#as a long islander im rooting for the islanders but i will admit that the islanders have a very slim chance of making it to round 2

[deodatasslawson]

It's gonna be Carolina in 5 isn't it?

[thermodynamic-comedian]

just re-watched asoue netflix finale episode.

you guys don't even want to read this, i am about to be so weird about this series.

ouugghhhh the. them finally driving in the fact that neither side of the schism is free of sin <2 hehe, sudden new perspective that changes the moral and ethical implications of everything that's happened in the series before *twirls hair and kicks feet* <222

olaf just being casually objectified. good. as he should. im happy. im happy he got put in that cage too btw. he is sooo pathetic and unwell and dramatic in this episode btw. if u even care.

klaus has grown up so much holy fuck. looking back at the first episodes and comparing him in them to him in this??? even his voice is so different oh my god. the boy really grew up. damn.

honestly i don't blame violet for wanting to stay on the island at first. she's been through so much, she's had to actively protect her siblings for so long, i don't blame her for being drawn to what seems like a happier, safer place.

i wish we would've seen sunny all grown up and stuff. see her be like an older sister to bea ii. might have to make a teenager/young adult sunny design. i think she'd be a culinary arts major. i also like to think later on in life she reached out to fernald and they're still friends and occasionally meet up and play card games whenever fernald's not at sea with his family :)

"you hurt people." "and people hurt me." actually losing my mind rn. that wasn't an accusation, and that wasn't an apology. that wasn't a judgement, and that wasn't an excuse. it's just two statements, both equally true. and they're both acknowledging things that they clearly haven't shared with each other before: kit's acknowledging how her feelings for olaf are in conflict with her morals, and olaf's acknowledging that his actions directly mirror the way he's been treated, specifically because he was unable to break that cycle. kit's admitting that she is not fine with what olaf's done to other people, and olaf's admitting that he's not fine with what's been done to him. it's not an emotional scene because they're in love; it's an emotional scene because of the lives they've lived.

hey do you guys think lemony ever tried to explain the complicated and could've-been-solved-with-polyamory mess that is sugar bowl gen's romantic subplots to bea ii. like was lemony ever just like "oh btw, i was in love with the woman you were named after, but she married this other guy. and they were the parents of the people that raised you. and also your mother used to date a criminal, who also used to date another criminal....and also my brother at some point probably. oh and my brother was also in love with this one librarian, and another one of our friends probably. oh and that other criminal? she also had a husband, who is now dating just some guy named charles i guess," and bea ii is just sitting there sipping root beer thinking "what the fuck man. i ain't never joining vfd this shit is wild."

[watchmegetobsessed]

Never Have I Ever - Harry Styles (part 3)

i did not expect this to turn into more than just a oneshot, but here i am, posting a part 3?? and there’s more to come??? lmao, im a mess, having a million wips at a time, whatever. enjoy this DIRTY piece in the world of Harry and Actress!Y/N hehe!

pairing: Harry x actress!reader

word count: 3k

warning: NSFW content (we are taking a dirty turn in this part babes)

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

“But are you really sure you’re fine?” Florence asks for the millionth time over the phone. “You know, I could come over anytime, have a few drinks and forget about the idiots who decided you don’t deserve that Emmy.”

“I’m very sure,” you chuckle, sinking further down on your couch, kicking your heels off your feet. “It’s not a big deal.” “Oh it is, but you are trying to act all tough, though I know it bothers you.”

“I didn’t say it doesn’t bother me, but there’s nothing I can do about it,” you tell her truthfully.

“You know, sometimes I forget that you are this wise ass bitch, not some petty loser that I usually am.”

You snort at her words laughing loudly. Florence is by far one of the funniest people you know, she never fails to make you laugh, no matter what’s the situation.

“It’s sad that I didn’t win, but I’m fine. Really. Maybe next time it will be me,” you say, genuinely hoping this wasn’t your first nomination.

“Okay, I’ll stop bugging you, but call me if you change your mind and want company.”

“Thank you, Flo. Talk to you later.”

Once you end the call you let a long, heavy breath out that feels like you’ve been keeping in all night. Walking into your closet you stop in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirror, taking a look at yourself, still wearing the burgundy pant suit you wore for the award show. You were the only woman in pants all evening and you felt more powerful than ever. You’ve always loved to make a statement with your fashion choices and tonight you feel like you definitely succeeded in getting the message through: you are a bad bitch.

Stripping out of the outfit you hang it carefully before putting on some sweats and an oversized vintage t-shirt, feeling so much more comfortable already. Your hair is still in loose waves and you kind of like the texture, so you just leave it like that, moving into your bedroom to check up on some emails.

Cozied up under your duvet, laptop resting on your thighs, you start replying to some emails, updating your schedule for the next week. You almost don’t notice the text you get, barely catching the lit up screen from the corner of your eyes. Grabbing the device from the night stand you smile down at the series of messages from Harry.

“Bunch of idiots,” the first one reads.

“I’m suing them. All of them.”

“You looked fucking unreal by the way. Couldn’t take my eyes off you.”

Biting down on your bottom lip you read the last one over and over again. It’s been weeks since your number landed in Harry’s phone and you’ve been texting nonstop since then. Whenever you pulled your phone out to check if someone had tried to reach you, there was always a text rom him waiting for you, making you smile most of the time.

“Thanks Xx,” you reply shortly, not sure how to react to his heated words of calling the whole Television Academy a bunch of idiots, though it surely warmed your heart.

“Enjoying the after party?” his next text comes fast.

“Nope, I’m home already. Didn’t feel like partying.”

“What?! You not winning is not an excuse to skip celebrating. You still got nominated!”

“Already celebrated that, so I’m out of occasions.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t let you do that. Text me your address, I’m going over with wine and takeout.”

His bluntness in flirting and shooting his shot has been amusing to you since the moment he sat next to you on The Ellen Show. Harry Styles doesn’t shy away to try and show his attraction, or at least not towards you.

You hesitate a little, not sure if you want him here, but something deep down in your guts is telling you that you definitely want him to come over, some dirty thoughts already popping into your mind, but you are quick to get rid of them.

You send him your address and he tells you he’ll be over in twenty. You use that time to clean up a little around your apartment. You left in kind of a rush earlier, being a little late with your glam team, so you didn’t bother to leave the place in a decent state. It doesn’t take long though to clean up the mess and checking the time you see that you still have a little time until Harry arrives. As you walk past one of the mirrors in your hallway, you take a look at yourself, debating whether you should change or stay in your comfy homey outfit. At last you drop the idea to put on a different outfit, not wanting to look desperate when Harry arrives.

Not long later you get a notification from downstairs that a so called Mr. Styles has entered the building and is heading up to your floor. Running a hand through your hair you walk over to the front door and opening it you stand there, waiting for the elevator to arrive. When the familiar ding hits your ear you notice how your heart skips a beat upon seeing him walk out.

“Hi,” you smile at him holding the door open for him. He looks amazing, as always, wearing a pair of brown high-waisted pants with a loose white shirt tugged into it, a teal denim jacket topping the outfit. He looks comfortable, but still well put together, something you have always admired in his style.

“Hello, Love,” he smiles back at you and pulls you in for a short, one armed hug before walking fully inside. “Didn’t know what stuff you fancy, so I got a bunch,” he admits with a chuckle, holding up two plastic bags completely stuffed.

“You really shouldn’t have,” you shake your head at him smiling as you lock the front door and lead him into your open concept kitchen.

“But I should have,” he argues, setting the bags down to the counter, packing out everything he brought.

Three bottles of wine, all of them different kinds, snacks, both sweet and salty, topped with an insane amount of Chinese takeout that could feed a whole family, not just two people. You put the wines into the fridge though you know they won’t get chilly enough by the time you open it. Turning to Harry you smile at him shyly, only just now realizing that he is in your home for the first time.

“Want a tour?” you ask, pulling your shoulders up to your ears.

“Would love that,” he smirks and lets you lead the way.

The modern apartment in Manhattan has been your home for a little over a year now. One of the first things you invested into once you started earning like an A-list celebrity. It’s spacious, you did the interior over once you bought it, formed it a little more to your taste. You walk Harry through the living room, the three bedrooms from which one is yours, the others function as a guest room whenever a family member of one of your friends needs a place to stay. There are three bathrooms in total, a study room that’s always a mess, your desk filled with scripts and books most of the time, but Harry tells you it suits your vibe.

“And this here is my wardrobe,” you end the tour, flicking the lights on in the walk in closet, probably your favorite part of the place. It’s bigger than your bedroom, but it’s exactly what you and your passion for fashion needs.

Harry curiously walks inside, his eyes immediately stopping on the burgundy pant suit you wore earlier that night.

“This, Darling, was an excellent choice,” he smirks over at you, his fingers dancing over the soft fabric of the pants.

“Felt amazing in it,” you nod smiling.

“I bet you did,” he chuckles softly.

The two of you head back to the kitchen and sit at the kitchen island, roaming through all the food Harry has brought. A short silence comes over the room that’s broken by Harry first.

“So how are you really feeling about tonight?”

“I’m fine,” you shrug, but then feel his hand on your knee that’s closer to him and your eyes flicker over to him, his gaze burning down on you intently.

“No, I’m asking fo’ real. You don’t have to mask your disappointment.”

Licking your lips you look back at your plate filled with dumplings and you start to just poke them around with the chopsticks in your hand.

“Of course I’m disappointed. Who wouldn’t want to win? But there’s not much I can do about it, right?”

“Still, you shouldn’t push it all down.”

“I’m not the type to rage very publicly, if you haven’t realized that,” you chuckle, diverting your eyes back at him, catching a soft smile on his lips.

“That I know of. Miss No Beef,” he teases you, even though you could pretty much say the same thing about him. “I was properly screaming at the screen when they said someone else’s name over yours.”

“Yeah?” you chuckle.

“Mhm. I was rooting for you big time.”

“Well,” you sigh turning back to your plate. “Sorry to disappoint.”

“Nah-ah, none of that crap, Y/N,” he protests right away, dropping his chopsticks to his plate as he slides off his stool, stepping closer to you, one hand lying flat on the counter, while the other one finds the underside of your stool and he easily turns you so you are facing him, your knees involuntarily parting so he could stand between them. “I’m not letting you think of any less of yourself because of some stupid award.”

“The Emmys are not stupid,” you correct him, but it seems like he doesn’t even hear you, staring down at you with a smug grin, his hand moving from the stool to your waist.

“Mhm, they are. They made the most talented and beautiful woman think she is not the best of all.”

You can’t push down the smile that tugs on your lips as you watch him slowly lean closer. Heart beating faster, you let him do whatever he has on his mind, not finding the will to push him away. Not that you want to do that, you’d be stupid to say no to this man.

“Who’s this woman we are talking about?” you breathe out with a teasing smile. Harry smirks back at you, his hand squeezing your waist gently as his other hand moves up to the base of your neck, his thumb running along your jawline.

“The woman I’ve been fantasizing about lately.”

A desperate whimper tries to escape your lips, but you bite it back in time, feeling so lost how much effect he has on you with just a simple sentence.

“What are these fantasies about?” you find yourself asking as he leans closer, his nose brushing against yours.

You’re aching for his lips, to feel him touch you everywhere. You want to come undone under his hands and the breaking point where you won’t be able to mask up your desperate feelings is threateningly close.

“I’ve been thinking about making her feel real good. Watch her fall apart under my touch,” he murmurs lowly and this time, you can’t hold that moan back. Your lips brush against his, but he pulls back smirking, not kissing you.

“Fuck,” you breathe out when you feel his hand move from your waist to your stomach, cheekily teasing you as he is drawing circles around your belly button over the soft fabric of your shirt.

“Can I touch you, Y/N? I really want to make you feel appreciated and good. Will you let me do that?”

Not able to find your voice you whimper out something that’s close to being a yes, but it’s not enough for him and while you are losing touch with what’s really going on, Harry is very much enjoying seeing you like this, all for himself.

“Use your words, Love. I wanna hear you say it.”

“Yes!” you choke out and luckily, he doesn’t waste any more time.

You feel his lips connect with your neck as both his hands work on the waistband of your sweats, pushing them further down a little before his right hand taps on the top of your lacy underwear, the one you wore under your suit tonight, the one Harry definitely thought about when he first saw you through his screen.

You gasp when his hand slides into your underwear, fingers finding your sensitive bud of nerves, pressing down on them softly. You desperately turn your face, eager to meet his lips, but he pulls back for your dismay.

“Not now, Love,” he tells you and though the words sting a little, you don’t have much time to dwell on them when you feel his fingers slide back and forth between your soaking wet folds. “So wet for me, aren’t you?” he smirks while you’re trying to breath evenly, though it’s quite the challenge.

His lips return to your neck and your hands fly up to grab onto the back of his neck and shoulders, his fingers teasing you around your hole, not entering just yet. You start buckling your hips, desperate to get him take the next step and he is surely enjoying the show you are putting on for him.

“Ready to feel good?”

“Yes,” you breathe out, hands grabbing onto his hair roughly and a loud moan escapes your lips when he pushes two of his fingers inside you.

“Fuck, this feels so nice,” he groans, lips nipping on the soft skin under your ear. He is quick to take up on a pace, moving his digits in and out, his thumb circling on your clit, adding that extra magic most men always forget about. But not Harry, he is eager to please you the best he can and if you weren’t sitting, you’d be on your knees for him by now.

“Yeah, tug on my hair, Darling,” he growls, his voice sending chills down your spine as you tighten your grip in his hair just as he asked, while you feel your climax building up.

He picks up his pace, curling his fingers inside you every time he thrusts them in, making you almost see stars. Your legs fly around his waist, ankles crossing above his bum as you bring him closer, and a whimpered groan bursts out of him, probably because his erection just got squeezed against his hand by your action, his nonstop moving hand now stuck between your heated core and his throbbing member. When his head pulls back you quickly look at him, about to ask if he is alright, but he just presses a soft, lingering kiss to the corner of your mouth as his unsaid answer that he is perfectly fine.

His forehead comes to rest against yours as he adds a third finger, making you moan his name in ecstasy. Your mind is starting to completely shut down, the sensation of utter pleasure taking over your whole body as you can feel your orgasm just a few thrusts away.

“C’mon, Love. Let it go for me,” he mumbles, his free hand sliding to your back so he keeps you flushed against him, your heaving chest touching his upper body with each drawn breath.

“Fuck, I’m so close,” you pant, eyes screwed shut, tipping over the edge of your climax. “Please don’t stop!” you beg whining.

“Never, Darling.”

And he keeps his words. He keeps going and going until your walls close up around his slick fingers and your thighs tremble around his waist. You tug on his hair once again, pulling his head back just enough so your eyes meet right when you come undone. His fingers keep moving a little longer, bringing you down from your high before the last wave of your orgasm dies down and you are brought back to reality.

When his fingers slide out of you, the feeling of emptiness makes you breathe out in dismay and it brings a smile to his lips as he licks his fingers clean and you swear that’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, watch him taste your pleasure on his own fingers.

Glancing down you see the very visible bulge in his pants and you reach down to return the favor you just had the pleasure to get, but his hands wrap around your wrists stopping you, your eyes snapping up to meet his.

“Not now, Love. This was all about you. I’ll be fine.”

“But—“ “No,” he cuts you off shaking his head gently. “Seeing you like this was more than enough for me.”

Biting down on your bottom lip you feel yourself blushing at his words, the whole situation that just went down dawning on you just now. Harry really did just finger you on one of your kitchen stools and it was one hell of an experience for sure.

When your gaze wanders over to his lips you remember how he refused to kiss you and now you actually have the chance to pay more attention to this tiny detail.

“Why didn’t you kiss me?” you ask him, legs falling from his waist as he goes to sit back on his stool. He glances at you, a soft smile on the lips that never touched yours.

“I wasn’t planning to do this, but I just couldn’t stop myself. However, I’m still trying to be a gentleman, so I won’t kiss you until I’ve taken you out on a proper date.”

“I can’t believe you,” you chuckle shaking your head at the absurdity of what he just said. “So you are fine fingering me shamelessly, but you won’t kiss me without a date?” you ask, rephrasing his words.

“That’s right,” he nods, his smile growing into a smirk now. Shaking your head you turn back to your probably cold plate of food, chuckling to yourself.

“Harry Styles, you are… something else.”

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[jvwhyte]

SJM's pinterest board. ACOTAR 6/7.

(No conclusion just suspicious stuff lmao)

Here's a photo i found on SJM's ACOTAR pinterest board:

THE MOIRAI (Moirae) were the three goddesses of fate who personified the inescapable destiny of man (and women). The role of the Moirai was to ensure that every being, mortal and divine, lived out their destiny as it was assigned to them by the laws of the universe.

In nearly all mythologies the three Fates, rulers of the past, present and future, are represented and many believe they symbolize the Triple Goddess, Virgin, Mother and Crone (Creator, Preserver and Destroyer).

In Greek mythology, the Moirai—often known in English as the Fates—were the white-robed incarnations of destiny.

“There were at least three dozen priestesses who worked and researched and healed here, though it was nearly impossible to count them when they all wore the same pale robes and so many kept the hoods over their faces.”

Clotho (/ˈkloʊθoʊ/, Greek Κλωθώ, [klɔːtʰɔ̌ː], "spinner") spun the thread of life from her distaff onto her spindle.

(Clotho: the mute priestess at the library)

Lachesis (/ˈlækɪsɪs/, Greek Λάχεσις, [lákʰesis], "allotter" or drawer of lots) measured the thread of life allotted to each person with her measuring rod.

Atropos (/ˈætrəpɒs/, Greek Ἄτροπος, [átropos], "inexorable" or "inevitable", literally "unturning",[13] sometimes called Aisa) was the cutter of the thread of life. She chose the manner of each person's death; and when their time was come, she cut their life-thread with "her abhorred shears". The figure who came to be known as Atropos had her origins in the pre-Greek Mycenaean religion as a daemon or spirit called Aisa. Another important Mycenaean philosophy stressed the subjugation of all events or actions to destiny and the acceptance of the inevitability of the natural order of things; today this is known as fatalism.

The Morrígan or Mórrígan, also known as Morrígu, is a figure from Irish mythology. The name is Mór-Ríoghain in Modern Irish, and it has been translated as "great queen" or "phantom queen".

The Morrígan is mainly associated with war and fate, especially with foretelling doom, death or victory in battle. In this role she often appears as a crow, the badb.[1] She incites warriors to battle and can help bring about victory over their enemies. The Morrígan encourages warriors to do brave deeds, strikes fear into their enemies, and is portrayed washing the bloodstained clothes of those fated to die.[2][3] She is most frequently seen as a goddess of battle and war and has also been seen as a manifestation of the earth- and sovereignty-goddess,[4][5] chiefly representing the goddess's role as guardian of the territory and its people.[6][7]

Mor may derive from an Indo-European root connoting terror, monstrousness cognate with the Old English maere (which survives in the modern English word "nightmare") and the Scandinavian mara and the Old East Slavic "mara" ("nightmare");[14] while rígan translates as "queen".[15][16] This etymological sequence can be reconstructed in the Proto-Celtic language as *Moro-rīganī-s.[17][18] Accordingly, Morrígan is often translated as "Phantom Queen".[16] This is the derivation generally favoured in current scholarship.[19]

The Morrígan is often considered a triple goddess, but this triple nature is ambiguous and inconsistent. The triple appearances are partially due to the Celtic significance of threeness.

(Three is a VERY common number in acotar (might make a whole other post on that))

Could Mor be one of the fates or even something more powerful than them, could she have a bigger part than we thought in the next story with Koschei ?

In the Republic of Plato, the three Moirai sing in unison with the music of the Seirenes. The term "siren song" refers to an appeal that is hard to resist but that, if heeded, will lead to a bad conclusion.

In Greek mythology, the Sirens (Ancient Greek: plural: Seirênes) were dangerous creatures, who lured nearby sailors with their enchanting music and singing voices to shipwreck on the rocky coast of their island. It is also said that they can even charm the winds.

i bet your thinking where tf is this looney going with this....well,

i also found this photo:

Celtic Mythology The GWRAGEDD ANNWN [wives of the underworld]were lake-sirens in Wales. These lovely creatures are known to choose mortal men as their husbands. One legend has it that they live in a sunken city in one of the many lakes in Wales. People claim to have seen towers under water and heard the chiming of bells. In earlier times, there used to be a door in a rock and those who dared enter through it came into a beautiful garden situated on an island in the middle of a lake. In this garden there were luscious fruits, beautiful flowers and the loveliest music, besides many other wonders. Those brave enough to enter were welcomed by the Gwragedd Annwn and were invited to stay as long as they wanted, on the condition that they never took anything back from the garden. One visitor ignored the rule and took a flower home with him. As soon as he left the island, the flower disappeared and he fell unconscious to the ground. From that day on, the door has been firmly closed and none has ever passed through it again.

“My grandmother was a river-nymph who seduced a High Fae male from the Autumn Court.”

Gwyn believes her grandmother to be a river-nymph. Is it possible that she was not but instead a lake siren? We know that Gwyn and Catrin's names are welsh (Lake-Sirens are found in wales) and the spring court has many ties to welsh mythology so is it really that far fetched?

In Celtic and Norse mythology, selkies (also spelled silkies, sylkies, selchies) or selkie folk (Scots: selkie fowk) meaning "seal folk"[a] are mythological beings capable of therianthropy, changing from seal to human form by shedding their skin. They are found in folktales and mythology originating from the Northern Isles of Scotland.

To further back up this, here is another photo of a Selkie woman on SJM's pinterest.

In David Thomson's book The People of the Sea, which chronicles the extensive legends surrounding the Grey Seal within the folklore of rural Scottish and Irish communities, it is the children of male selkies and human women that have webbed toes and fingers. When the webbing is cut, a rough and rigid growth takes its place.

Children born between man and seal-folk may have webbed hands, as in the case of the Shetland mermaid whose children had "a sort of web between their fingers",[25] or "Ursilla" rumoured to have children sired by a male selkie, such that the children had to have the webbing between their fingers and toes made of horny material clipped away intermittently.

“My twin had the webbed fingers of the nymphs—I don’t.”

Once again we see that Catrin posses traits of these water-creatures.

Keep in mind SJM has this on her board - The cover of Celtic folktales which has one story in particular of a 'sea-maiden' whom makes a deal with a mortal man.

I proceeded to continue searching through the board and found this:

Sathariel (Hebrew סתריאל, Greek: Σαθιήλ) is one of the Qliphoth, corresponding to the Sephirah Binah on the kabbalistic Tree of life. It represents the Concealment of God, which hides the face of Mercy. The form of the demons attached to this Qliphah are of black veiled heads with horns, with hideous eyes seen through the veil, followed by evil centaurs.

'veiled heads with horns'

The Qliphoth are the shadow of the Sephirot, the chaotic force that exists when the Sephirah is unbalanced. Binah is the Sephirah that gives birth to form, the great mother of the cosmos, the eternal womb. Through her, the spiritual energy of Keter and Chokmah are woven into the matrix that eventually becomes matter.

In Jewish Kabbalistic cosmology of Isaac Luria, the qlippot are metaphorical "shells" surrounding holiness. They are spiritual obstacles receiving their existence from God only in an external, rather than internal manner.

Quiphoth (shadow of sephriot) = Shadowsinger

"shells" surrounding holiness = The shadows protected Azriel

They emerge in the descending seder hishtalshelus (Chain of Being) through Tzimtzum (contraction of the Divine Ohr), as part of the purpose of Creation.

Sathariel had black feathers on his wings and his body was shrouded in darkness.

Honestly idk where tf im going with this 😩😩

I've put in far too much effort to delete it so i apologise if you've gotten all this way to be disappointed but

Conclusion:

Mor =/≠ Three fates

Gwyn = Heritage is sus? could be related to some interesting people

Azriel = Sathariel ?

If anyone has ideas to add pleaseeee tell me lol

i'll probably update this when i can be bothered

(FYI i love Gwyn and i'm not saying she's a siren or luring anyone but you've got to admit her grandmother is a sus lmao, especially with half the shit on SJM's pinterest.)

[fairycosmos]

do u talk to ppl every day? i feel so abnormal and lonely bc i dont. literally apart from this ask im sending u rn i talk to no one ever. i dont even have a phone so. i have no one in my life its like ? wow. its been like this for years. i feel like im not even in my own life

no i don't :( apart from family because i live with them but even then sometimes we just dont talk at all. to be fair im really introverted and hate talking to ppl every day but i get what you mean. i hear you and i have a few conflicting thoughts about it. i don't think it's abnormal per se, i think going through periods of isolation especially during your teens/twenties is very normal in fact. it's fucking hard to find friends and even harder to find Your people. like i wish it was talked about more because im pretty convinced theres just an unfathomable amount of us living like this, like little islands. and it's very hard not to internalize this as something being wrong with you, especially because love and friendship seems to find others so easily? idk why it doesn't for me. but i don't think theres much credence to the idea that we're alone because we deserve to be or any of that other self loathing crap. ofc that doesn't stop me spiraling into that belief pretty much daily - but i have to admit it never does anything to help my situation so. im trying to be sad and proactive ssimultaneously. at the same time, i wanted to say that it's very natural to crave these connections nonetheless and it's ok to be upset about it. i think theres a common belief these days that you can self love your way out of anything and that we dont owe each other shit but, humans are social creatures and it's alright to need others. i really relate to you saying you feel like youre not even in your own life because of it, too. i didn't develop a sense of self because i had no support system or people around me and now i think i'll drift forever, too. it's hard to know who you are when you have nobody to tell you what you're not. when you have no one to share tangible experiences and memories with. im out of practice at being a friend and a person other people want to know. it's hard and i honestly understand the loneliness.

do you think there are any small steps you can work towards that would make this feel a little less heavy? is getting a phone something you can consider, looking into groups and clubs in your community, even online? (discord, tiktok, this blue app, even fb groups have been a source of support for me in regards to grieving.) ultimately think of what interests you or what you've always wanted to get into and then try to seek that community out. even just mental health support groups can be a godsend. its way easier said than done and the process may be slow and non linear but, honestly every small effort counts. i took a few singing lessons on zoom in the lockdown and being able to talk to someone over a shared hobby was just nice and not as awkward as i was expecting and it took a lot to do it but i did. probably couldn't now as ive regressed lol but it is what it is. if that feels like too much rn i totally get it though. you could even just drop me a message if you like. i'd love to be friends 💗 anyway sorry this got long i just am in the same boat so i could talk ab it forever but my point is i genuinely don't think you're abnormal. you're just having a hard time and i don't blame you at all. no one tells you where to find friends as an adult. my inbox is truly always open, i really hope youre able to find the connections that you deserve soon. im rooting for you and sending so much love. one day at a time ok x

[platoniclokiimagines]

Hey I love your blog so much it has become my safe place! Could you write something where reader is recovering from a restrictive eating disorder and loki is there for her? Im there myself and support from my favorite character would be warmly welcomed 💙

A/N: Normally this would be at the end of this little section, here, but I wanted to put this first because I would like to very much apologize for this being so beyond late. I hope that you’re still here, still reading this blog, and still finding solace in Loki. Disordered eating is something that I’ve been struggling with for the past several years, too, and I know how difficult it can be to come back from that. I appreciate you entrusting me and my Loki to help comfort you, and I hope you know that you are never never never alone. Stay strong, dear one. We’re rooting for you.

WC: 1367

TW: eating disorder, eating disorder recovery // Please please PLEASE do not read this if you do not think that this is something that you can handle.

You’d been staring at the open refrigerator for what feltlike hours, and you were certain you would have stayed there for several more,if you hadn’t heard the soft voice behind you.

“Y/N?”

You didn’t turn around; you didn’t need to, to recognize theperson speaking.

Loki had been the best, when it came to helping you throughthe steps to recovery after you’d admitted how much trouble you’d been havingeating, and they had been doing everything that they could to make the entireprocess on you as easy as possible. They sat with you when you were strugglingto eat, they made you your favorite foods to eat in hopes you’d take even justa couple of bites. They were with you through it all.

In short, they had been a blessing, and you were gratefulthat they were being so kind and understanding in a time where you just neededthe support of someone who cared about you.

“…come on. I’ll fix you some tomato soup. Nice and easy, andwarm.”

They patted you on the back gently, and you mustered up aweak smile as you closed the refrigerator and watched them start digging aroundfor a pot and a can of soup.

“You could just make it in the microwave, you know. ‘sfaster,”you pointed out as you hefted yourself onto a barstool on the opposite side ofthe kitchen island.

“Perhaps, but then I wouldn’t have nearly as much time totalk to you while I make it.” Lokismiled at you then, and you smiled a little more as well, watching as theyturned the stove on and got the soup all ready to heat up just how you likedit, some salt, some pepper, and just a bitof mint, which you’d convinced them ‘enhances the flavor.’

Once they got it simmering, they turned around to face you,leaning back against the counter, close to the stove so they could stir everyso often.

“How are you feeling?” Loki asked it not entirely hesitant, but with obvious concern thatyou might take ill to the question itself, but you only shrugged a bit.

“Bad food day.”

Loki nodded. “That’s okay. It happens sometimes, yeah? Andthat’s okay. Maybe the soup will help a little. Just a few bites, that’s all.And if you want more, then that’s great, but if not, that’s alright, too. Wecan save it for later.”

You nodded and smiled weakly, but it was a struggle. Lokimade it all sound so easy and reasonable, and while you appreciated that theywere handling it that way, it still made you wish that you could get yourself to be that reasonable.

“Hey… Where’s your mind at?” This time, Loki spoke muchsofter, and when you looked back up at them, you found they were watching youintently, brow furrowed as they looked at you, and you heaved a sigh, knowingit would do neither of you any good to lie.

“I just… wish I could get my own brain to think that reasonably.”

Loki nodded slowly, and set down the spoon they were holdingas they moved to lean across the kitchen island so they could place a hand overyours, and for a long moment, they stood there in silence, as they tried to workout what they wanted to say.

“…I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now. And Idon’t want to tell you that anything that you’re feeling is bad or wrong oranything like that at all, because I’m not you, and I don’t get to decide that.But what I can tell you is that…everything that you are feeling isvalid. No matter what anyone else says, or what you say, or even what your ownmind says. It’s tough to be tormented by your own thoughts. That I can relate to. But that doesn’t meanthat you aren’t capable or deserving of good things. Even if it doesn’t feellike that right now, maybe it won’t forever. But I’ll be right here with you,every step of the way, to remind you. You’ll find yourself again, in time. Andit will be a glorious day when youdo. But for now, doing your best is more than enough, and I’m so proud of youfor doing all the hard work that you’re doing.”

You swallowed thickly, finding yourself unable to look atLoki and instead focusing on the pattern of the marbling beneath your hands. “Whatif I relapse again?”

“…then you relapse. And we start back from step one again.That doesn’t mean that you’ve failed. Not in the least. It means you’re still fighting. And that will always beadmirable.”

You nodded a bit, but you still couldn’t look up at Loki,not with the way you could feel the tears welling up in your eyes.

“…is there even a point in trying?”

Loki squeezed your hand gently, and then let go, only tocome around to where you were sitting, kneeling in front of you and taking yourhands so that you were left with no option butto turn on your seat so that you could face them.

“Of course there’sa point. There’s always a point.” Loki held your hands tightly, making surethat you were still looking at them before they continued again. “There are somany things you have left to experience. So many sunsets, and rainstorms, and…trips to the beach with the rest of the team, where you get so sunburned youcan hardly move the next day, and… evenings curled up on the couch with thatbook you’ve read so many times you could probably recite it word for word.Laughing at Thor when he gets caught up in regaling battle tales, and makingfun of Rogers for not understanding where a popular reference came from. Warmcups of tea on late nights… Norns,rainbows and little puppies and babies laughing so whole-heartedly that itmakes you laugh.”

Just the thought ofthat was enough for you to give a watery little laugh, and that was really whatLoki was hoping for, and they smiled along with you, grateful for even just that much from you.

“…we need you herewith us, Y/N. Me, Thor, the rest of the team. We all need you. And we care about you, and we want you to be happy andhealthy, and we’ll do everything that we can to remind you of that, I’ll do everything I can to remind youof that. We’ll take it one day at a time. Just… don’t give up on us yet, okay?Don’t give up on us.”

You sniffled, rather gracelessly, and gave a hiccupping littlesob of a laugh as you nodded a bit. “…one day at a time.”

Loki nodded, and squeezed your hands gently one more time beforestanding up so that they could properly hug you, smiling a bit when youreturned the hug just as fiercely.

“…we’re going to get through this, Y/N. We will. I promiseyou.”

You nodded against their shoulder, and after a long while,drew back, rubbing at your eyes with your sleeve. “…I really needed to hear… all of that.”

“I know. That’s why I said it.” Loki grinned a bit, just cheeky enough to make you smile, aswell, and you couldn’t help but to laugh. “I bet that soup is warm enough foryou, now. We’ll get that in a bowl for you, and get you a nice glass of water. Andwhen you’ve had however much you want, we’ll have a nice little spa day, yeah?I’ll even let you put that horridblack goo on my face that hurts when you take it off.”

“…a face mask?”

Loki only waved their hand dismissively, focusing on ladlingthe soup into a bowl for you, and you smiled a little more, the last bit ofapprehension melting away, at least for now, as you watched them work with suchcare. You weren’t so sure youdeserved them, but gods, were you glad to have them.

“…you’ve got yourself a deal.”

[fluffymcu]

Letting Loose

Part EIGHTEEN

This series is TICKLE related.

Series Summary:  You’re the little sister of the one and only Captain America. You’re also the youngest girl on the team, so that automatically makes you the avengers’ little princess. And they spoil you as such. They have become your amazing family and you don’t know where you’d be without them. This series will show random adventures and fluffy events in the daily life of the reader and her family, along with an unexpected turn later on as you read.

A/N: I’m so excited to be writing this series! This is my first time writing one and I’m a bit nervous but I hope it all goes well. :)  Hope you enjoy!

Word count: 1,962

It’s been a few weeks since the outdoor movie night. You were looking around in the kitchen for something to eat when you heard Sam make cooing noises from his place on the couch. You turned to see him flipping through a small book. You walked up to him to see what he was doing.

“What are you doing?” you asked. He looked up from the book and smiled.

“Just lookin’ at your baby pictures.” He said. 2 or 3 of them were from the 40’s that Steve had in his uniform pockets while he was looking for you when you were kidnapped by HYDRA. Others were pictures that Steve took of you during the year that you lived in an apartment when you were 5 or 6. The rest were pics that the team took of you as you were growing up after you moved to the tower then the compound.

“Aww, look at you here.” Sam said, pointing to a picture of you with cake on your face. You internally cringed. “So adorable! With your little bows and everything.” He chuckled. You rolled your eyes.

“I’m not adorable Sam.” You said.

“Oh, so you think you’re grown now? That you're not adorable anymore?” Sam asked amused, raising an eyebrow at you. You pursed your lips and crossed your arms.

“I may not be grown but I’m not adorable.” You sass. Sam chuckled at that.

“Well I have proof right in this book that says otherwise. Look .“ he smirked, flipping through many pictures or tea parties, days in the pool, the team playing dress up with you, and much more. Through them all, Sam was cooing the while time. You groaned and covered your face in mild frustration. You flopped down on the couch and sat there with your arms crossed. Sam didn’t pay you any mind at your little attitude and just kept looking through the book.

Bucky walked in at that moment and noticed your body language. “What's y/n so worked up about?” he asked Sam. “I mean, I know she’s talking to you and that’s enough to make anyone upset but is there any other reason?” he said, smirking a bit when Sam rolled his eyes.

“Little y/n here is getting all blushy because I keep calling her adorable.” He says, going the extra mile and pinching your cheek. You whined and leaned way from his touch.

“I am not!” you could feel your face heat up. Bucky chuckles.

“Aww this is what you're cranky about? You are adorable! Look at these pictures of when you were a baby; just precious!” he says, taking the book from Sam. You growled and slumped down further on the couch. And so begins the endless teasing session.

“Look she's pouting. How cute. But as adorable as that is, I don’t know how I feel about having a pouty y/n. Buck?” Sam asked.

“Oh, absolutely not. We can’t have that! We love a happy girl!” You pout even more to show your annoyance.

“Nothing seems to work, Buck. What do you suggest we do?”

“Well, I suggest we do the thing that always makes her smile when she's pouty!” he smirked. Your eyes widened at that and you tried to make a run for it. Of course, the super soldier got to you before you could and thew you back on the couch. You were already giggling, your annoyed facade melted away. Nervousness overcame your senses as you realized not only Bucky is about to tickle you to pieces but Sam as well.

“Wahahait! Guhuhuys! I wont pout anymore I promise!!” you begged. Sam raised an eyebrow at you.

“But will you admit you're the most adorable thing ever?” he teased. You pursed your lips in a scowl.

“I'm not adorable!” you growled.

Bucky and Sam turned to face each other at the same time and nodded. “Denial.” They immediately pounced on you, eliciting loud and bubbly giggles. Bucky was wasting no time, drilling his fingers into your ribs while Sam was repeatedly squeezing up and down your thighs. You threw your head back as you laughed, keeping your arms pressed to your sides, even though it did nothing to stop the ticklish feeling.

“We can do this all day, y/n. We won’t stop until you admit it.” Bucky smirked, slipping his hands up further up to wiggle his hands under your arms. You yelped and erupted into high pitched laughter, kicking out your legs. Sam had gotten a hold of your ankle and was now scratching the soles of your feet, making you cackle. “Tickle tickle tickletickletickle! Aww look at that adorable smile!”

Your face was burning as you blushed and tried to cover your face with your hands. Bucky chortled and shook his head, lifting your shirt and blowing a long raspberry, tasing your sides at the same time. You shrieked and shot your arms right back down. “I CAHAHANT BREHEHEATHE!” You cried, shaking your head side to side. It became clear then that they really weren’t going to stop until you gave in. “AHAHAHAA OKAHAHAY OKAHAY ILL SAY IHIHIT! EEH!” You squealed and fell right back into hysterics when Sam started to squeeze your knee.

“Well? On with it then.” Sam said, not letting up on his torture. Bucky smirked, tickling your waistline, making your giggles more desperate.

“Lehehet me go fihihirst.” You giggled.

“NOPE!” Bucky said, blowing another raspberry. You arched your back with a loud squeal and finally gave in.

“NOOOHOHO OKAY IM ADOHOHORABLE!” You cry, scrunching up your neck when Bucky feathers is fingers around your neck.

“Damn right. And you better not forget it.” Bucky said, pointing a finger at you warningly. You blushed and turned on your belly to hide your face.

“Okay, yes, I get it.” You whine feigning annoyance. Bucky and Sam shook their heads at you fondly and left, leaving you to rest on the couch. You didn’t even realize you had fallen asleep until you woke up to the soft chatter of the team in the kitchen. You hadn’t opened your eyes yet and were still half asleep but you could tell you were covered by a blanket. Someone must have put it on you when you were asleep. 

You stirred a bit and woke up a little more at the sound of chuckling and you sat up on the couch. You had wrinkle marks on the side of your face that was on the couch and you turned to see the team gathered around the island, having a conversation. Bucky has the first one to turn and see you, smiling and winking at you. You giggled, drawing the attention of the other team members. Steve smirked at your sleepy look and put a hand on his hip. “Look who finally woke up.”

“How was your nap, Sleeping Beauty?” Tony teased, taking a sip of his coffee.

You giggled again and fell back onto the couch to cover your blush with the blanket. “What are you guys talking about.” You asked, your voice muffled a bit. Steve walked over and sat on the couch next to you, lifting up your legs to sit. 

“We’re trying to see where we wanna go to eat. There’s a nice new Wing place a few minutes out of Town Square. Think you’d like that?” He asked, rubbing up and down your legs comfortingly. You nodded with lazy smile. 

“Alright, it’s decided then. Everyone get ready, we leave in 20.” Tony said, clapping his hands once. You got up and headed to your room to change. 

-----

You had all just gotten seated at a table after waiting for a bit. The place was still new so there were many people there wanting to try it out. You sat next to Wanda and Bruce and across from Peter and Steve. Nat was sitting next to him. As you all were waiting for your food, you looked up to see Steve sit back and wrap an arm around Nat’s chair, kinda on her shoulders while Nat scooted closer with a small smile.

You grin to yourself and dig in your food when it arrives, making a note to yourself to tease Nat about it later.

------

You got home and followed Nat around all the way to her room, without saying a word until you closed the door behind you.

“So...? You and Steve have been getting pretty close, huh?” You asked, bumping her with your elbow and smiling smugly.

“What makes you say that?” She said, folding the rest of her laundry and obviously trying to play dumb. You rolled your eyes playfully and scoffed. 

“Oh come on, don’t act like you don’t know. I think you should tell him and the team already; that you officially like him.”

“And why should I feel the need to do that yet?”

“Because... if you don’t tell him, I will.” Of course you were joking, you would never reveal a secret like that to someone. You turned on your heel and went for her bedroom door. “Oh, steeeeve!” You sang. 

You didn’t expect Nat to quickly come up behind you and stick her hands under your arms. You immediately clamped up and fell to the floor in a fit of laughter. “Y/n don’t you dare-I will stuff you in my closet and keep you hostage if you tell him.” She playfully growled, following you to the ground and wrapping herself around you like a koala and tickling your sides. You were in hysterics.

“OKAHAHAHAY I WONT TELL HIM!” You cried. You were basically trapped in her hold and could do nothing but laugh your heart out. She dug her nails in between your ribs, making you cackle and arch your back.

“Promise?” She smirked, pinching mischeviously at your hip bones.

“YEHEHES, I WOULD NEVEHEHEHER!” After that, she let you go from the hold and you sprawled out on the floor, panting. Nat smirked at your exhausted state.

“Good.” She hummed. She stood up and leaned against the bed, her lips pursing a bit as she gulped. “So... how do you feel about it?” She asks a little more serious now.

You sat up on the floor and raised your eyebrows at her. “Seriously? I ship you guys so hard.” You chuckle. “If I’m being honest, I was rooting for you guys since... years ago.” You chortled. “I really hope you guys become a thing in the future. Just know I’ll always be your #1 supporter.” 

Nat smiles at that, pulling you into a hug. “Thank you y/n. That means a lot. Really. I don’t know what would be possible of us if you didn’t support a relationship between us. Maybe now we actually have a chance.” She says. 

“Of course!” You smile and return the hug. 

-------

Tonight was Movie night with the team and you were snuggled up to Thor and Bucky. You smiled to yourself and leaned your head on Thor’s shoulder. You looked around to see everyone on the couches, sitting net to each other nd having their snacks with smiles on their faces. Right then, you had a moment where you became aware of the life you had. You had an amazing family that loved you so much and you loved them back. You wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. You glanced over at Ruby Anne to see her sitting net to her dad. You couldn’t wait until Ruby started to feel the same feeling you feel about your family now. You sighed happily, resting your head back on his shoulder.

  “Goodnight. Love you guys.” You sighed before closing your eyes. The rest of the team smiled at you and bid you goodnight as well. 

“We love you too y/n/n.”

-------------------------------------------

I hope you all enjoyed the series! this was really amazing and stressful and fun and interesting to write and although some of these chapters may not be that good, just know I put my heart and soul into this series and I was really happy to share it with you guys. <3 

Remember if you’d like to request a plus chapter continuing this storyline, feel free to request one but please be specific as to what you’d like to see in that chapter. Thank you so much for reading! :D

[bi-demon-ium]

thots on newest ep

spoilers below the cut

oh im so glad there’s more milligan and mr benedict interaction!! wholesome!! 

i’ve had a fic planned about them pre-canon since ep one but i wanted to wait for more information (which i’m glad i have, might wait until the finale tho in case there are any more twists)

milligan starting to remember!!! 

also everything with rhonda and number two!! they had me in the first half ngl i thought it was gonna be more of a wedge between them and i was like :/ but then they fixed it real well 

what’s up with the pool thing, too?? i’m intrigued 

GOD the whole thing they used to spy on mr curtain was a) completely nerve wracking somehow, b) so endlessly complicated

i just KNOW miss perumal is gonna show up soon. sad she wasn’t in this episode tho, i miss her :( 

mr benedict’s dorky little hat 

curtain is just so...... Creepy. his vibes... they are rancid... tony hale is doing a very good job 

but like seriously what the fuck? he radiates Danger and not in a hot way in a eaauuhhhhhhhhhh way 

SPEAKING OF VIBES RHONDA SAYING VIBES I LOVE HER 

and the whole Demetra thing 

they’re messengers!!! i’m simultaneously like Yay!! and Oh No 

ah constance is so smart :) 

i actually kinda liked kate basically getting a sports scholarship to stay. it’s both pretty funny and like. i’m intrigued to see where this goes with martina.

i actually like martina, although for the most part so far it’s more been like “god what a shameless bitch. i love her” because she is just so fucking funny (”Your God Can’t Help You Now” what a fucking riot who says shit like that???) but now... i admit, i’m a little intrigued. she’s still Like That but like... Hm 

also i love that they just made it tetherball why is that so funny to me 

TeThErBaLL iS tHe PrIdE oF tHiS iNsTitUtIoN

you know i don’t have a lot of negative things to say about the show so far, there are some changes i don’t like that much or don’t think were necessary but nothing really that didn’t at least have potential to go in a good direction, but there are two things that do really annoy me: 

one. mr. benedict hasn’t fallen asleep like once in the last few episodes and he’s literally on an enormous emotional rollercoaster. i get that it tends to be more triggered by happiness/joy but we know it can just be extreme emotion in general, particularly since he literally fainted when the house got invaded, so like??? what gives???? i get he can’t be passing out every five seconds since he’s a little 24/7 stressed but like. when he was yelling and throwing things or even right after when he just comes up to them looking Distressed And Depressed, or like. later when he’s talking about his brother or when he actually sees him or like. just . at all? are we gonna pretend it’s just gone now? and like when he realized what gemini meant he one hundred percent should have conked out on the table like. what could literally be a more extreme emotion than finding out your long lost twin who you love and miss is also the basically-a-supervillain enemy of yours who is destroying society, brainwashing people, and who actively tried to have you kidnapped and possibly worse, 

two. ok maybe this is stupid but the cheating thing really annoys me. not that they’re doing it but just how Offended they are at how Wrong it is like. sure, there’s for sure a strong argument that under normal circumstances cheating is wrong. but like. y’all. y’all . you a) aren’t here to actually go to school, you are here to stop someone from Doing The World Domination, b) it’s kind of not a real school anyway, it’s an evil institute for brainwashing all of society, with nonsensical classes, that manipulates and actively hurts children, c) oh and if you don’t YOU LITERALLY GET BANISHED FROM THE ISLAND AND YOUR BRAIN GETS ERASED LIKE????????????? actually it is not only okay but Objectively Morally Right to cheat in your situation. it’d be one thing if it was specifically rooted in the fear of getting caught (which, to be fair, is mentioned) but like they--sticky in particular--seem much more concerned with it being Unethical and like. i get being uncomfortable with it, i do! but again! the consequences if you don’t are you or your friends LITERALLY GETTING BRAINWIPED AND SENT AWAY I???????? IT’S OK IF SHE PEEKS AT YOUR ANSWERS I PROMISE YOU IT IS MORALLY OKAY AND YOU WILL NOT GO TO THE BAD PLACE FOR IT OKAY 

anyway. 

this is kind of negative but not really, more thoughtful--what was up with the waiting room? like, ngl, my adhd ass would have just started like. scrolling through my mental playlist and i would have started just singing whatever was in my head, or just like, lay on the floor and take a nap, like. dont get me wrong, waiting sucks, and i would probably go a little stir crazy after a while, but it’d be in the form of like. talking out loud a lot and singing loudly to distract myself and honestly someone would probably come in to shut me up but like--you get the idea, the point is, the waiting room seemed a bit underwhelming. like i get that it sucks, but like. it seemed like an extreme reaction? to be fair, the room seems designed to fuck with you, with the weird ambient noise of the fish tank and the clock (i wonder if it actually is set to glitch like that like, literally, or if that was just symbolic/in his head?) but like. it still seems a little strange. although, you know, i wonder if it’s like. one of those signals? i mean curtain’s whole thing is messages you can’t hear, right? like, supposedly some haunted houses are caused by high pitched sounds just outside our range of hearing but like, we can still sense it, but without the actual sound to ground it it makes the brain all paranoid and sometimes even hallucinatory or something? so i wonder if the waiting room specifically has some sort of super high/low pitched sound playing that makes you all jittery and anxious and lowkey hallucinating (hence the clock and looping fish--the clock could be faked, but the fish seems a bit extreme. not impossible to fake in this kind of universe i should think, but extreme) actually.... wait is it just like.... a miniaturized and more intense/targeted version of the emergency? i mean, sticky did literally describe it as anxiety (but more intense) and literally what is the emergency but this planted growing anxiety about everything? idk, maybe i’m totally off base here, i’m not the sharpest tool in the box, but like. food for thought 

again not really negative so much as just kinda like Hm but mr. benedict really feels less calm wise mentor and more like. shouty and emotional and volatile? well, volatile isn’t the right word, and obviously this is like 100 percent super due to the whole Curtain Revelation but like. idk, it’s weird? don’t get me wrong, i still love him, and when he has gotten like that he’s never like. the worst he’s done is raise his voice slightly and then apologize after, the throwing stuff was all actively outside and away from the others so that’s just venting babes 

and like he never raised his voice with the kids or anything either (although to be fair, that was before the big emotional revelation that seems to have kinda shattered his normal mask(?), but i strongly believe he wouldn’t lmao) 

it’s just weird bc it’s not what i associate with the character? but like. it’s not necessarily bad, and he’s still just as passionate and kind and genuinely caring, he’s not necessarily an angry person and he’s certainly not violent or rude or anything, he’s like.

the core of the character is still there and it just makes him seem--you know, actually, i think that’s really it. in the books, obviously, it’s more about the kids and the kids alone. mr. benedict functions as a mentor and protector, but he’s kind of like a parent--parents are people, obviously, but kids don’t fully... compute that? they do, but they don’t. the first time a kid sees their dad really cry or their mom properly lose her temper when she’s normally so even and calm or whatever else, it’s a real shock. which is kinda how i felt seeing mr. benedict yell the first time honestly, lmao. 

but anyway, the point is, kids kinda see grown ups, particularly ones they look up to, as invincible, untouchable, etc. they’re almost not fully rounded characters (okay, that’s not fair, they’re still developed and fleshed out, but i mean, they’re not the focus or the point, they’re not here to be sad or angry so much as they are there to be the calm mentor/etc. right? to be clear i am mega simplifying this, but i’m trying to get the vague point across) or rather, they’re not really the main characters. 

while in the show, it’s split more evenly between the kids and the adults having their own conflicts and problems--they’re each being given storylines, and mr. benedict is grappling with a real emotional problem with this revelation of his brother, and we get to see him as flawed rather than as just the Calm Wise Dad. 

so like while seeing him raise his voice was weirdly unsettling for me, it was like. it makes him more human? more of a character? i think that’s also partly why i’d like to write fic for him in the first place, because he’s a compelling/engaging character (and again... the vibes r so Pure) while in the books, while i really liked him, i wasn’t as interested in that kind of engagement. 

NEXT EPISODE PREVIEW SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT IF THAT BOTHERS YOU?

hm . morse code compromised, that can’t be good. ngl we’re getting into the territory of the first book i don’t remember that well (god i should reread it!! fuck!!) so i don’t remember if/how that happened in the book, but i do know that the second they specifically suggested using morse to cheat i was like :| hm bc like. my immediate reaction is Ah... Unnecessary Connection... Perhaps Do Not? in case they get caught or something you know 

i do wonder how they’ll communicate now tho... Oh A Hawk? oh worm 

ah the missing aren’t missing they’re only departed my beloved <3 

i just love the creepy messenger chants and i’m sad they changed a lot of it to nonsensical non rhyming things

imagine just fucking around with your radio and suddenly catching on to a creepy child’s voice slowly chanting the missing aren’t missing , they’re only departed. all minds keep all thoughts so like gold closely guarded, 

i’d lose my shit bro 

[mirror-juliet]

hi, may i request a smut scenario about rough sex with leedo on the kitchen counter, thank you so much!

Tagging @youneedapiratekink our thirsty af captain. I hope you also enjoy bby

Thank you so much for requesting hun!!! I had a lot of fun writing this🤍

Warnings: Unprotected sex. Kitchen sex, teasing, rough sex, slight degradation, oral sex (giving and receiving.)

Other Plans {Lee Geonhak/Leedo}

Geonhak had asked you to help him come up with choreography for the group, you two met up at your house where you could practice in your dance room. The both of you could have practiced in the Oneus dance room, but you didn't like it when people saw you coming up with new moves. Besides, you had other plans for your boyfriend

You had made sure to dress in a loose-white shirt and rather short, form-fitting shorts. Your hips would purposefully brush against him, pretending like you simply aren't paying attention.

It's obvious that Geonhak is trying his best to concentrate, his breathing becoming longer and his grip got firmer. The both of you quickly became aware of the tent beginning to root in his sweatpants, a grin forming on your lips.

"Do you think the others will mind this much skin ship, Darling?" You pushed your body flush against his, reaching your arms up to lock around his neck behind you. Your eyes make contact in the large mirror the both of you are gazing into.

Your actions caused the lower part of your stomach to show from Geonhak being to tall. You couldn't care less that he was obviously drinking in your image, you threw choreography out the window once he walked into your home."Isn't this a little much Y/n? We're all close, but not this close." He grabs ahold of your wrists and removes them from his shoulders, trying to take back the authority which he had lost in this situation.

That wasn't something you planned on giving up willingly today. You we're going to push Geonhak to his breaking point, seeing how long it will take.You turn around and put your palms on his chest, locking eyes with him more intimately now.

"What did you have in mind then?" Your words come out velvety, laced with promises you new wouldn't be kept.You watched it, the hormones that are so easily agitated in boys have been tuned on in his brain, drawing him closer to you.

"I think we should practice later, i think we should begin something more.....Fun." Geonhak slows his words, delicately undoing the string to your shorts, pulling his head closer to yours.

His lips nearly graze yours when you move to his cheek and blow on it, distracting him enough for you to slip out of his grasp completely.

"i'm going to paint my nails, feel free to keep me company." You leave the room, leaving Geonhak a flustered mess.

He soon joins you on the couch, turning on the tv, allowing you to rest your legs on his lap. Actually, it was more of you placing your silky legs on him; trying to keep himself content while you rub your legs together.

You admire the red lacquer that stains your nails, remembering how Geonhak loved the shade on you. "Do you like them?" You show him your nails, in response he bites his nail and rubs your legs.That was your Queue  to leave. Couldn't have him get comfortable

*********

You had him following you around your house for about two hours, now, a normal person would have gotten annoyed and left about the third time you teased. Geonhak was not normal towards you, he was crazy for you. He would follow you to the ends of the earth if you wanted him to.

He also loved being in control when it came to the hormones you two caused each other, this experience was foreign to him. Never once have you ever made a dominate move towards him in this way, not for this long at least.

Right now, you were reaching for a snack bar in the cabinet that happened to be on one of the higher shelves. It had you bending slightly, trying to reach the back of the cabinet.Geonhak did not let this opportunity go to waste, he had been waiting for you to loose your guard. He came up behind you, pressing against you and caging your body into the counter.

"Surprise." He laughed, slipping his hand under your shirt to rub your stomach.You turn around to face him giving him a view of the blush blossoming across your chest.

"Y/n" He grabs your hand by the wrist and presses it against his hardened bulge, humming in half discomfort and half pleasure."Do you feel what you have caused?" He presses your hand harder against him to match his tone slowly dropping in octaves.

You had to admit, the way he shifts and feels under your palm made it seem very uncomfortable or borderline painful for him. If not borderline then fully painful. Geonhak seems to hear what you think, shoving your hand down his pants and boxers.

"My dick has been throbbing for so long, do you know how painful that is?" He rests his head on your shoulder, allowing you to hear every grunt and shaky breath he takes as he uses your hand to get himself off. Your hand is lubed with his sweat and precum leaking out of his throbbing tip.

You unfasten his pants, pulling them down along with yourself and his boxers until you're on your knees. Your allow most of his girth to be engulfed in your mouth before gently sucking on him. You bob your head down an turn your head slightly, moving the other way as you bob your head up.

The plan to give him a good blow and hand-job crumbles to ashes as soon as he takes hold of your hair, shoving his member farther into your mouth.

Strings of moans and grunts escape his mouth as he fucks your face. Determined to make him break his dominate role, you bring your hands up to grope his ball sack. He only thrusts faster, making your jaw ache every time his pelvic bone smashes into your face.

You flatten your tongue, feeling the thick vein on the bottom twitch from doing so,  making your jaw go as slack as possible helps relief some of the uncomfyness "Just like that baby. Oh fuuck."

He quickens his thrusting, throbbing inside you. "Nghah. Im g-gonna cum." His deep, velvety voice turns you on, prompting one of your hands to reach down and palm against your heat; only enough to tease yourself.

You suck hard on him, his grip on your hair becoming painful, he tries to pull you off. "No-t Yehht." Your hands hold onto his thighs from the back to keep him in your mouth. He was going to submit to you.

He lets out a long groan as he stills in your mouth, his head rests in the back of your throat and shooting his hot semen down your throat. You  swallow all of it. This time Geonhak seemed to make much more than usual, most likely the result of your teasing.

You clean him up as he comes down from his high, too dazed to stop you, only letting out soft moans. Your hot muscle proves to be too much on his sensitive cock, he pushes your head away, breathing now ragged.

Your fingers twist together behind his neck, plump lips meeting his own. "You drive me crazy, do you know that? Do you know how much of a whore you are?"Geonhak rips your shirt over your head, his large hand shoving down your shorts

His fingers don't bother to wander further than your clitoris, the stimulation alone would drive you insane. Without delay the pads of his fingers rub fast against your clit, making your knee's buckle"Geonhak, sl-slow down." Your small hands wrap around his wrist, trying to pry him off of you. He chuckles in your ear.

"But you don't really want me to, no you want me to keep rubbing you until you're screaming in pleasure." He drags you to the island with his hands still rubbing you, he pushes you, your back arching onto the surface.

He picks your hips up and places them on the counter, giving his easier access to pull your shorts off."No underwear. You slut."

"Hmmm-aah!" Two fingers turn to four now rubbing side to side.

"Oh quit whining, i could do this." Three of his other fingers dip into your hole, hitting your g-spot immediately. "Now this is the amount of pleasure that warrants those screams. Not just your clit."

Your hands grab hold of his wrists, not doing much to stop his strong ministrations."Geonh- i'm gon i-i m gonna."

"Do it, cum over my fingers." He pumps them faster, making you clench hard around him

"Nugahhh! GeonhaAH!" You squeal out as the bubble in your gut bursts. Geonhak only removes his fingers inside of you, allowing the warm liquid to escape your clenching hole.

He doesn't stop rubbing you, only speeding up-if that was even possible, but it very much was. Another wave of cum spills out of you onto his shirt and the floor, your thighs were shaking, preparing yourself for a third orgasm.

"Please, i want you in me for the next one." The words are hurried to escape your mouth, you let out a shaky sigh of relief as he takes his  fingers off of you.He pulls your hips to the edge, flipping you onto your stomach; your short legs dangling off the edge.

"God you're so sexy when you squirt all over me. You'll do it again for me wont you." He kisses your neck gently"Hnuh!" You groan out as he shoves his fat cock in your pussy, bottoming out right away.

'Okay, he wont give you time to adjust, that's okay' You think to yourself, he begins to mercilessly pound into you, your hips shove against the corner of the island; a painful sensation drowned out by the cock inside of you. The girth stretches you out beautifully, feeling every inch of your soft core.

Geonhak rakes his hand up the back of your scalp, pulling roughly on your hair once at the crown. His other hand pushed the middle of your back, giving him two very different anchors to shove into you over and over.

"Tell me how much you love my cock, slut.""I love you cock so much Geonhak! It stretches me so good. Please fuck me harder!" You push your hips into him, your ass jiggling at the motion.

"You asked for it, remember." He nearly laughs at you. He pulls you back further into him, bringing your sex's together hard enough that your hips begin to bruise from his. A loud smacking sound echo's through the kitchen, his balls hitting your clit with every thrust.

Both of you moan and grunt into each other, Geonhak's deep voice now beginning to whine. It was something you never heard before, sexy as hell to say the least. You wanted to hear it more.

"Please, cum all over my ass Geonhak." His member begins to twitch inside you as his hips become greedy, signaling his release soon to come

A few more thrusts later Geonhak is screaming out a groan while releasing strings of semen on your luscious ass. He enters you again to help you with your final release that has you digging your nails into the counter top.

You both calm down, Geonhak leaning on you while sort of hugging you. His chest feels nice as he breaths against you.

"I'll say it again. You're so fucking sexy when you cum like that." laughs erupt in the kitchen, something that came easy for you two during sex, because it was with you two."But baby girl..." He growls. "Next time you try to take control like that. I won't fuck you like that for a month." His words excite you, but also terrify you sexually. That was something you were going to have to try out, knowing somewhere in the back of your mind he would keep his promise. But where's the fun in being safe?

[getbacktoworknovice]

💀Over the Edge

[A one shot about Edward wanting to cliff dive and coaxing you into joining him~ Reposting some of my older Ao3 stuff~]

Edward Kenway was a fascinating creature.

He could climb to the top of a mast, jump from building to rooftop, raid ships and dig up treasure chests all while wearing these incredibly uncomfortable (and heavy) looking robes. You honestly had no idea how he did it.

Or how he was able to keep as silent as he did, prowling through underbrush and treetops as if he were some animal stalking prey. It was impressive as it was terrifying. You had seen all this first hand when Edward had saved you from a sinking man o’ war the year before. You’d been on board as a navigator when the pirates had raided it and Edward had graciously given you a choice between staying on the sinking ship or taking up with him and his men.

Your choice had been obvious.

His crew wasnt too thrilled with the idea. After all, it was bad luck to have a woman aboard but Edward said that was all “superstitious nonsense”. Since you were a navigator he used you in that sense helping him get to certain places on maps he had in his quarters. He was a fine navigator himself but he said he wanted to “give you a purpose aside from being a distraction to his crew”.

You had gotten used to his cockiness and his relentless flirting as well. He was no “ladies man” by any means though he proclaimed to be one. He got himself slapped fairly often for someone so “smooth” but you didnt make it a point to learn much about that side of him.

He had saved your life and you owed him. You were returning the favor by helping him find all the treasure on the maps he had “found” and so far you had been doing a far better job than even you knew you were capable. It had been quite an experience and while the crew was a bit rowdy when drunk they were a good hearted group.

You grew very fond of them and they began to treat you as one of their own. Swapping stories over ale and singing shanties together off key and horrible to annoy the one sailor who took his shanties seriously. They respected you too, though you suspected part of that was because Edward threatened to de-man anyone who tried anything with you.

You’d heard them often call you Kenways property.

You werent sure how you felt about that…

“Oi, Y/N!” You heard Edward call and you snapped out of your daze. The two of you were on some unnamed and uninhabited island his newest map had led you to. It took a bit of hiking as the treasure was located pretty high up next to a cliff but you two had made it and Edward had began digging.

You occupied yourself with your journal, writing down coordinates and recording what treasure was found as well as what the flora and fauna was like. Sometimes it took hours for Edward to find anything other times he would find it pretty quick.

Looking up you could see his half naked form coming out of the hole he’d dug. It was particularly hot today and you couldn’t blame him for shedding the heavy looking robes he wore. He drug his arm across his face to wipe away the sweat on his brow and gave a grin.

“I found it!” He said, beckoning you over as he leaned down to haul it up. It was a pretty good sized chest, big enough to hold a person it seemed. It certainly was heavy enough as you had to help him yank it out of the hole he’d dug.

Cracking it open he gave an excited exclamation as it was full to the brim with gold and jewels. “Geez, whoever hid this mustve robbed a nobleman or something.” You said in amazement as Edward happily inspected the gold pieces to make sure all was legit.

“There’s an entire fortune in here, and I’m sure glad we found it before the miserable soul I got that map from did.” He grinned closing the lid and standing up there beside you. Reaching over he ruffled your hair with a broad smile. “Good with your directions as always, thanks for the assist Y/N.” He said putting his hands on his hips as he looked out to the open sea, towards the Jackdaw he could still make out over the cliff.

“Well, I know you and I wont be able to haul this all that distance.” He said, giving the side of the chest a kick as you went to retrieve your journal. You groaned inwardly. That meant the two of you had to make the long hike all the way back to the ship and then back AGAIN to retrieve the treasure and back AGAIN to get it back to the ship.

Seeing you pull that face Edward gave a smirk. “Whats the matter love?” he asked crossing his arms and giving you a playful look. “Dont you like all the bugs and roots and rocks?” He teased and you swatted his arm.

“Quiet you, I just dont like the idea of doing all that hiking in this heat.” You admitted, slinging your bag over your shoulder with a sigh. “It IS hot today isnt it…” Edward remarked rubbing his neck as he turned with you to start the trek back but stopped you by grabbing your arm.

“Hey now wait a minute.” He said as you turned to face him quizzically. “I know a way we can get back to the Jackdaw faster AND get cooled off.” He said and you gave him a doubtful look. “Your not as good with shortcuts as you think you are captain.” You started but he pulled you with him as he began walking back to where he’d dug up the box.

“I guarantee this one will work.” He said as he brought you over by the cliffs edge, pointing down to where you could just make out the Jackdaw around the bend. “See? She’s right there.” He said and you cocked your brow at him.

“And? What are you going to do fly over to it?” You teased unsure where he was going with this. Shaking his head he gave you a mischievous smile. “Nope, WE are going to swim to it.” He said, putting his hands on his hips as he peered over the edge.

You blinked.

“What?”

He looked over at you, he had that look in those piercing blue eyes of his. A look that said “lets do something crazy and pray to God it actually works or we are so done for ” and you took a step back. “Oh you are NOT serious.” You said and he nodded as he saw the reality of his idea sink in. “I am love, think your brave enough to try it?” He teased and you backed up even more.

“I am NOT jumping!”

“Its the only way down–”

“I’ll hike this island a THOUSAND times before I do ANYTHING close to what your suggesting!”

“Come on love, your SUPPOSED to be a pirate!” He teased going towards you as you backed away. You huffed and placed your hands on your hips defensively. “I’m a navigator FOR a pirate, I never claimed to be one!” you insisted and Edward only laughed.

“Your guilty by association I’m afraid,” he said tilting his head at you as he saw your face getting pale at the idea of jumping off a cliff. “Come now, I’ve done this thousands of times, I promise you’ll be all right.” He tried to reassure you gently.

Gentle wasnt a side you saw of his too often.

Taking a deep breath you shook your head again. “No way, something will go wrong and I’ll die.” You said and he gave one of those smiles of his that made you wonder how he really felt about you at times. “It cant go wrong if you do exactly what I do,” He said and offered his hand. “I’ll hold your hand if you want me to?” He said.

Normally you would slap it away and just stalk off. You couldnt do this, there was no way…but there was something…almost exciting about the idea. You’d seen him leap off of building before, landing in haystacks or piles of underbrush even into the ocean and always emerging unscathed.

You could trust him…couldnt you?

Hesitating at first you finally took his hand. “F-fine! But if I die, I’m going to KILL you.” You insisted and Edward laughed aloud. “Now love, dont be that way, I promise you we’ll be all right.” He assured you and moved his hands to the strap of your bag to pull it off of you. “Im sure you dont want your precious journals ruined though, might wanna leave those behind.”

Taking your bag over by where he’d discarded his robes he beckoned you once more towards the cliff. Which might as well have been the edge of the world for you. You peeked over the edge skittishly, your heart beating a thousand miles a minute in your chest.

Edward was looking over as well but he had a sile on his face and a challenged look to his features as if this were some kind of test he was determined to pass. Seeing your nervousness he reached out and grabbed your hand. “Ready?” He asked and you almost jerked your hand away.

“As I ever will be I think…” You said quietly and he gave your hand a squeeze. “The most important thing to remember,” He said as you looked up at him. “Is to not hesitate. Jump first, think later.” you snorted.

“Oh yes, wonderful advice.” “I give only the best.” he smiled and took a few steps back, getting some distance between the cliffs edge for a running start, still firmly holding your hand. You hadn’t realized you were squeezing his so hard your knuckles had turned white but he didnt seem to mind. Or notice even.

He had strong hands.

“We’ll go on three aye?”

You nodded.

“Three!” He yelled and took off with you having to keep up. If you lived through this you would call him out for being a cheat. You hadnt even realized your feet had left the ground until you were both air born. It was the most terrifying and exciting feeling in your life. You had your eyes closed the entire time, the world rushing around you making you sick to your already upset stomach.

Soon enough though you felt Edwards arms wrap around you and opened your eyes right as the two of you hit the water. It took you a moment to get oriented and at first you freaked out because you were heavier with your clothes and all but you felt Edwards arm around your waist as he hauled the two of you to the surface.

You broke through the water with a gasp Edward taking in breath beside you as he surfaced. He was laughing like an idiot, his fist in the air in victory as he floated there beside you. The first thing you did after catching your breath was punch him in the arm.

“You cheated!” You insisted and Edward feinted pain at your punch giving you a wink. “Ah cmon now love, it was all in the name of building your confidence!” He teased, raising his arms in defense as you started swatting at him with your hands.

“Your insane!” You said but you had a big smile on your face and you were laughing. That had been quite a rush admittedly and…you even felt you could do it again. He only grinned at you, grabbing at your hands to stop your onslaught.

“Yes I am, but that is one thing you love about me right?” He teased and you blushed yanking your hands away. “Seriously Captain, your a mess.” You said, turning away to begin the short swim to the Jackdaw.

You heard him behind you chuckling to himself.

“Say what you will but you followed me over the edge of a cliff.” He called out to you as you made it to the ship, grabbing onto the wooden slats that ran down its side. You scooted over to make room for him as he climbed up beside you, gently running his hand through your hair.

“Your something else yourself Y/N,” He said, looking at you with those blue eyes of his making your heart thump a bit. “Something I havent quite figured out…but I am going to.” He assured you before giving a wink and climbing up onto his ship.

Leaving you with your face pressed against the wet boards trying to hide the big smile and blush on your face.

[saladbarselectionmenu]

Horses are Tyrian cryptids

Halloween 2020 prompt 1: cryptids @tyrias-library

Listen this is technically late but I just wanted to write about horses as cryptids because it remains the funniest thing in the world to me that tyria is just, completely horseless and lets be real horses are absolutely terrifying when you actually think about them.

(X) this is the noise I was envisioning the horse to be making, for those of you who like me have never really heard a horse being mad, enjoy this new weird knowledge you have of exactly how freaky and reptilian they sound. I also understand better the idea of sounding “hoarse.”

if im hyperlinking this right you can read on Ao3 Here (X) Otherwise click to continue!

Evening on the ranch is quiet - with the skyscales fed and cared for the only sounds filtering through the kitchen were the soft clicks of a knife on a chopping board as Amadaria prepared dinner and the faint, nearly imperceptible hum of Emerics data pad. The gentle scene washed in the swaying golden light of sunset where it filtered through the trees.

“THERE’S A HORSE AT THE WATERFALL.” Cheza shrieks as she crashes through the door, her momentum nearly sending her head over heels and saving her from the knife that goes sailing out the open door around where her head was a moment before.

The kitchen pauses any previous activity save for Cheza panting furiously for breath, Amadaria quickly retracting her arm back down before clearing her throat, “A horse, Cheza?” The young sylvari bobbles her head, desperation and excitement beaming from her face and posture as she waves her arms erratically out the door, “It has to be! It looks like a centaur but it has no arms! Just a big, long face and these weird teeth!” she says, putting her hands up in front of her face, parallel to each other with wrists close to her mouth and fingers pointing outwards before wiggling them back and forth in what apparently approximate teeth to her? Amadaria wasn’t sure but knew better than to ask why exactly that meant teeth or it’d be several more hours before they got back to the possible horse sighting.

“Ah, I thought horses were extinct? Or so close to that they may as well have been, Are you sure you didn't see some kind of monstrous deer?” Emeric suggests gently, “we are after all in melandru’s domain, there are a few massive versions of animals here and horses haven't been sighted in hundreds of years at the least.” “No way! This thing didn’t look anything like a deer, not even like Hellal! It’s legs were way too thick, and it’s tail was this big, long thing! Like human hair instead of like a deer's cute little tail, and it’s hooves were wrong and so was it’s face! There’s no way it was anything but a horse,” Cheza paused then as a new idea visibly crossed her mind, hands fisting by her chest in excitement, her eyes and face literally lighting up like a lightbulb with her bright, white glow, “or maybe, a new species?!” “A horse would be more likely, it even sounds like you got a good look at it” Amadaria interrupts, deciding to put that idea to rest before it could take hold and leave the younger disappointed. Switching her attention to Emeric before continuing. “As you say this is the living section of Dragonfall and if there's anywhere a horse is going to be found it’s in the ruins of the human nature God domain.” she switches her attention back to Cheza then, raising the ridge of one ‘eyebrow’ “The real question is whether it was alive or not.” The youngest pauses, face scrunching as she recalls. Her glow dimming slightly as she thought, “I think so,” she says finally, “It wasn’t glowing or giving off that mist like the guardians here do, but sometimes I think things here get confused on whether they’re dead or not too.” Amadaria nods, clapping her hands together and drying them off on a towel, “Well then, sounds like we have a new sighting to find!” Chezas glow and expression flicks right back up to megawatt standards. ---

Crouched in the trees atop their skyscales, Cheza visibly vibrating with excitement atop her shimmerwing while Emeric clung to Amadarias back as if the slightest shift would send him plummeting to his death at the end of the maybe fifteen foot fall, Amadaria has to admit that Cheza does, in fact, seem to have found a horse. Something no one had managed in either the campaign against Kralkatorrik nor in the intervening near year of the island being studied and inhabited.

There at the edge of the waterfall pool, drinking from the water and paying absolutely zero attention to the three people crouched on dragons fifty feet away from it stood a truly bizarre looking creature.

Long, thick legs with chunky cowlike hooves stretched almost six feet leading into a body covered in short gleaming chestnut fur stretched over an almost ridiculous amount of muscle. Sure enough it’s tail was a swath of overlong but graceful hair, flicking back and forth lazily at nothing.

The horse’s strangest feature however had to be on the front. Amadaria was old enough for most of her visions of The Dream to have come and gone, leaving it a smear of memory in her mind slowly losing its clarity, with Ventari more of a memory imprint than properly remembered. She had, however, seen more than enough centaur in her waking life to find the lack of torso jutting from the creatures front to be particularly jarring.

Instead its wide neck arched down into an oblong head with pointed ears and the truly impressive but blunt teeth Cheza had tried to imitate in the kitchen. It’s eyes were wide, dark and shining. Much like a deer or a goat they popped bulbously out to either side of it’s head.

“Should we try and catch it?” Cheza hissed, the horses ear flicking in their direction before it went back to ignoring them.

“Maybe we should wait and see if it has a herd?” Emeric suggested, daring to lean forward to get an inches closer look.

“We might lose it. Go for catch and release and we’ll get a tracking tag on it. That way we can follow it’s movements too.” she tapped Emerics hands and shifted so he could let her go, a practised shuffle leaving him with the reigns in hands and Amadaria on the branches of the tree. A shimmer of light later her crystalline wings were half furled and ready for take off. 

“Herd it towards the roots and I'll see if I can get on it’s back for implanting the chip.”

The other two nod and launch, the horse suddenly paying attention as the two dragons sweep around the outer edges of the pond and cut off it’s escape. Emeric hovering low to the ground and stopping it retreating as Cheza sped in to herd it forward. The horse took off like a shot with a sound not unlike a raptor - sprinting head long at the tree but not without trying to force Cheza from the sky, rearing and swerving like it wanted to catch the skyscales wings in it’s teeth or under its hooves and wasn’t picky which.

Quicker than she would have thought the three are near enough to Amadaria for her to leap off onto it as it sprints past the roots of her tree, the creature coming to a sudden stop with a spray of water and leaping into the air as soon as her arms get around its neck. Bucking, writhing and rearing the creature does its absolute best to get her off and - if the way its eyes were rolling in fury were any indication - trample her to death under its hooves.

Thankfully the tracking gun is an easy application, Amadaria shimmies up it’s back and snags the ear in the pincers of the gun, a quick button later and the horse is tagged with the small blinking light that indicates an active tracking signal. The horse lets out another growl like snort at deafening volume and slams itself onto all fours, getting ready to buck. Using it to her advantage Amadaria uses the extra force to boost herself into the air just a bit higher than a normal take off would allow and soars up out of the furious creatures reach. The animal stomped and reared at her where she hovered a good forty feet above it, giving off one last truly atrocious noise before galloping off as Cheza and Emeric circled back around to meet her on the ground.

Her feet thumping down on landing nearly cover up the sound of her heart in her ears, exhilaration racing through her veins as Amadaria meets the others excited grins with a buoyant beam of her own, “I think we can call that a success!” she laughed.

Cheza cheered as Emeric beamed his own proud smile down at Amadaria. “How does it feel to be the first person to ride a horse in the last few hundred years?” he asked. Another giddy laugh bubbled out of her, unstoppable in her mirth, “Probably about as good as it feels to be the first to see one! I can’t wait to see the looks the other Priory members will have when they hear about this!” She grins up at Cheza, “You have first sight so you get final say on the name of the paper, any thoughts?” Two weeks later the first chapter of “The Shrieking Menace - an account of the rediscovery of horses by Cheza, Amadaria and Emeric” rolls out to datapads across the continent, resulting in renewed clamour for research opportunities on the island and a spike of funding from quite a few human nobles.

[gunnerpalace]

Hi! Same anon as the previous one. Tbh, I agree wholeheartedly with you. Y'see I do ask rhetorically,too but i could really accept and understand how and why ppl can be oblivious to IchiRuki, and somehow felt that the 'canon' should suffice, even the most excruciating of all is the fact a number found the ending even acceptable (ships aside, too). Again, I could respect that. But it's my greatest bane when ppl ask 'why' and not be clear they are asking rhetorically because I literally will

provide you an actual answer. And I get it, it’s the reason why ppl find shipping wars toxic and silly. But then again, as human, conflicts are always part of us (partly because as social psych explains so, we are gravitated to the negative for that allows us to change and survive), and the reason why “logical fallacies” are coined in the first place. Human will always debate, and argue about something; the only thing we could change is how we approach the opposing views.

Again, I dont condone any way, shape or form of abuse and harm. In some certain extent, I could perhaps understand it’s much harder for some IH to approach the actual argument being there’s either too much noise, and trapped in their own island between sea of salt. Thus becoming too acquianted w/ few IH who shared the same thought until it became their views as the only truth (see, that’s why its important to have debates! it is what keep us grounded and fair! Just like you said)

Who am I to speak though? I never ever challenged anyone anyways. And as you said, you just have to understand things in every way you could possibly think of–endless ‘whys’. Which is where I agree in your reply the most–this silly fandom wars is just the black mirror to every truth that lies beneath human psyche–the dark and the grimy. Heck, being a psych major is like staring at dark hole–at times, good, but most just plain confusing, revolting even or just heartbreaking.

Sorry it’s been long, but for the final of this ask: let me tell how glad I was with IchiRuki fandom I found in tumblr. It was the saltiest I’ve ever been (im not generally a fandom person anyways) but it’s the himalayan salt–expensive and actually nutritive it really deepened my desire to become wiser in general. And you for your wonderful essays, critiques and whatnot. I definitively would love to talk with you more not only about IchiRuki but the wonders and nightmare that us humans! Kudos!

I have sitting in my drafts a post spelling out my thoughts on “canon” (and thus, the people who cling to it) in that as a concept it privileges:

officiality over quality when it comes to validity (thus violating Sturgeon’s law)

corporations (intellectual property rights holders) over fans, and thus capitalists over proletarians

hierarchical dominance over mutualist networking within fandom

curative fandom over transformative fandom

genre over literary content

plot over characters

events over emotions

It is notable that (1) generally degrades art as a whole, (2) generally advances the capitalist agenda, and (3–7) generally advances the dominance of men over women (as the genders tend to be instructed by society to view these as A. dichotomies rather than spectrums, and B. to ascribe gender to them and make them polarities). These form the sides of a mutually reinforcing power structure (in the typical “Iron Triangle” fashion) designed to preserve and maintain the status quo.

Who really benefits from say, the policing of what is or is not “canon” in Star Wars? Disney, first and foremost. And then whomever (almost certainly male) decides to dedicate their time to memorizing the minutiae of whatever that corporation has decided is “legitimate.”

One can imagine a universe in which fan fic is recognized by companies for what it is: free advertising. (Much like fan art already is.) Instead, it is specifically targeted by demonetization efforts in a way that fan art isn’t. Why? Because it demonstrates that corporate control and “official” sanction has no bearing on quality, and it is thus viewed as undermining the official products.

In the same way, by demonstrating that most “canonical” works are frankly shit, it undermines the investiture of fans in focusing on details that are ultimately errata (the events, the plot, the genre), which is the core function of curative fandom and the reason for its hierarchical structure. The people who “know the most” are at the top, but what they “know” is basically useless garbage. And those people so-engaged are, of course, usually male.

To “destroy” the basis of their credibility, and indeed the very purpose of their community, is naturally viewed by them as an attack.

(This is not to say that efforts to tear down internal consistency within established cultural properties are good unto themselves, or even desirable. For example, efforts to redefine properties such as Star Wars, Star Trek, Doctor Who, and Ghostbusters, for the sake of a identity-politics agenda have largely A. failed as art, B. failed as entertainment, C. failed to attract the supposedly intended audience, and D. failed to advance the agenda in question. Trying to repurpose extant media in the name of culture wars is essentially always doomed to failure unless it is done deftly and gradually.)

(At the same time, this also shows what I was talking about last time, with regard to people seeing whatever they want to see. You will see people complain that Star Trek and Doctor Who didn’t “used to be so political,” which is obviously nonsense. These shows were always political. What changed was how their politics were presented. For example, Star Trek has, since TNG, always shown a nominally socialist or outright communist future, but was beloved by plenty of conservatives because they could [somehow] ignore that aspect of it.)

Of course, almost no one is seriously suggesting that one side of the spectrums outlined above be destroyed, rather merely that a new balance be struck upon the spectrum. But, as we have seen time and again in society, any threat to the status quo, whether that be 20% of Hugo Awards going to non-white male authors or the top income tax rate in America being increased by a measly 5.3% (from 28.7% to 34%… when the all-time high was 94% and for over 50 years it was above 50%) is a threat. This is why, for example, Republicans are out there branding AOC as a “socialist” when her policies are really no different at all from a 1960 Democrat who believed in FDR’s New Deal. (Which they, of course, have also demonized as “socialism.”)

(As an aside, all this ignores the fact that most of the “literary canon” of Western civilization, or at least English literature… is Biblical or historical fan fic.)

And this is when I finally get to my point.

Those people out there who denigrate and mock shippers and shipping, the people who hurl “it reads like fan fiction” as an insult, and so on, are the people who benefit from and enjoy the extant power structure. You will see the same thing with self-identified “gamers” complaining about “fake girl gamers.” Admitting that the hobby has a lot of women in it, and a lot of “casuals,” and is indeed increasingly dominated by “non-traditional demographics” is an affront to the constructed identity of being a “gamer.” They are “losing control.” And they don’t like it.

This exact same sort of population is what the “fanbase” of Bleach has been largely reduced down to through a slow boiling off of any actual quality. Of course they’re dismissive of people who are looking for anything of substance: their identity, their “personal relationship” with the franchise, is founded on a superficial appreciation of it: things happening, flashy attacks, eye-catching character designs, fights, etc.

(What this really boils down to, at heart, is that society at large has generally told men that emotions are bad, romance and relationships of all kinds are gross, and that thinking and reflecting on things is stupid. So of course they not only don’t care about such things, but actively sneer at them as “girly” or “feminine,” which is again defined by society at large as strictly inferior. And this gender divide and misogyny is of course promulgated and reinforced by the powers that be, the capitalists, to facilitate class divisions just like say racism generally is.)

(The latest trick of these corporate overlords has been the weaponization of “woke” culture to continue to play the people off one another all the time. “If you don’t like this [poorly written, dimensionless Mary Sue] Strong Female Character, then you are a racist misogynist!” They are always only ever playing both sides for profit, not advancing an actual ideological position. It is worth noting that there was a push by IH some years ago to define IR as “anti-feminist” for critiquing Orihime for essentially the exact same reasons [admittedly, not for profit, but still as critical cover].)

Which makes it very curious, therefore, that the most ardent IH supporters tend to be women. (Though there are more than a few men, they seem to tend to support it because it is “canon” and to attack it is to attack “canon” and thus trigger all of the above, rather than out of any real investment.) I think there are a number of reasons for this (which I have detailed before) and at any rate it is not particularly surprising; 53% of white women voted for Trump, after all.

What we are really seeing in fandom, are again the exact same dynamics that we see at larger and larger scales, for the exact same reasons. The stakes are smaller, but the perception of the power struggle is exactly the same.

Of course, the people who are involved in these things rarely think to interrogate themselves as to the true dimensions and root causes of their motivations. People rarely do that in general.

Putting all that aside, I’m glad that you have found a place you enjoy and feel comfortable, and thank you for the kind words, although I am not of the opinion that there is anything poignant about the non-fiction I write. It is, as I keep trying to emphasize, all there to be seen. One just has to open their eyes. So, it’s hard for me to accept appreciation of it.

Anyway, don’t feel shy about coming off of anon rather than continuing to send asks. We don’t really bite.

[dirtyages-blog]

TrashOpera and break for Garbatising

{Soliloquy of Ludovico Trashenberg, ordinary member of Cockrats colony}

From dust we are born  

To dust shall return

Journey of life  

Awaits final turn, 

In cosmic timeline       

Its as brief as a flash

So I better rush

Raising pile of trash!

Competition for waste <wealth>

Is ultimate drive

At dirty-age phase 

Of evolution of life,

It justifies 

Any means to an end:

Hypocrisy, lies,

Harm to environment.

More garbage we get 

More happy we’ve got

It’s as evident fact 

As existence of God, 

Countless piles   

Are everywhere 

But they are not mine! 

Why fate is unfair?

I have intention  

To reach success

I’d sell soul to Satan  

Along the path 

I never question 

The direction I steer,

I follow the revelation 

Of sacred voice which i hear 

{Ludovico’s antennas start perceiving electric signal conveying speech}

Cocorats tune in!

To brain-polluting machine,

Clear mind is cardinal sin

In congregation of dirty regime,

Let ceremony of media stream

Into transmitters begin!  

{STANDING OVATION burst as background noise of broadcast}

Flow of junk information 

Is filling up your head  

With simple explanations 

Of difficult questions you have,

It carries conventional wisdom 

About everything

Liberating from stress of decisions 

And heavy effort to think, 

Worries, doubts and pain

Will fade away   

While you are entertained 

By fairy tale,

We keep tradition

From ancestors in past 

To bow in submission 

To broadcast 

Everything you should know

Comes from media net

Welcome to  

Holy Propaganda Show

I’m your host Dictatorat 

{Again STANDING OVATION, they rise and fade permanently during further broadcast, sometime other emotion appear resembling sitcom style}

Nature of Cocorat

Is trash pursuit instinct,

Clean environment is threat 

To become extinct,

Long time ago,

Writes divine constitution, 

God blessed this world 

With global pollution!

Than our spices 

Appeared for mission 

To errect Trashopolis city

In these perfect conditions.

Prophets obtained  

Derelict map

Which led the way

To island of dump, 

Here God proclaimed  

“Be junkful and multiply  <fruitful>

You are going to reign 

Over garbage you occupy!

Drag as much as you can

To this holy spot 

To represent 

Your love of God!

I’m gona rest 

I’m already exhausted 

But divine interest 

Will be reinforced, 

I put in charge government 

To control the lab

Of sacred experiment

Which i set up,

Better comply 

With righteous behavior

Providence eye  

Maintains surveillance,

You are conditioned 

To feel reward 

When electric stimulation 

Convey word of God!

Dictatorat 

Will give proclamation  

On my behalf

Standing Ovation!

Sermon today 

Is going to preach 

Virtues way 

To get filthy rich!

There are in the wilderness 

Treasures of waste  

They wait hunter-gatherers 

Of Tresheism faith!

Hurry up and move on

Into adventure 

Bankorats bestow loan 

To make trip arrangements, 

Sail across

Pollutic Ocean 

Avoding predators  

With extreme caution,

Walk through the beach 

Of the coursed land

Where’s no more garbage

Just palm trees and sand,

Follow the sign 

Showing the course 

Directly to mines

Of trecious resource,

Start digging and grab 

As much as you can   

After come back

Again and again 

Again and again

Again and again

At the wild dumpster  

Remember to pray

There are many monsters 

Along the way  

Countless scavengers 

Have fallen on dirty alley 

Carrying garbage

From the junk valley,

Dangers and troubles 

Of Odyssey

Are nothing compared

To wealth you’ll receive  

When you arrive 

To Treshopolis border   

Hardly alive 

With post traumatic disorder, 

Count the profit  

You completed ordeal 

After you settle

Bankorats dial.

{SIGN: Dirty Business District} 

{Cocorats have to return the loan + interest to Bankorats, after this transaction is done they are left almost with nothing}

{Cocorat#1}

In Cocorat race

I compete and compete 

But cant satisfy my ambition and greed

{Cocorat#2}

Life in Treshopolis is hard and unfair 

I’m approaching edge of despair 

{Cocorat#3}

I’m getting tired and sick

My pile is too humble to invite chick 

{Dictatorat keep delivering proclamation}

Misery is essential 

Part of this world 

I offer salvation 

To those who reach God

I have a dream 

This dream 

Is deeply rooted

In Trashopolis dream, 

That one day

We’ll retire 

From heavy working routine,

And go for vocation 

To infinite amusement park 

For eternal duration 

And not coming back!

Various rides 

Are everywhere you can see

Without lines 

And entrance is free!

We are gona waste

Time just for leisure 

On garbage surface  

Too large to measure, 

Gratification and pleasure  

Are permanent at this place,

Im evidently talking about 

The promise land 

Which is above on the cloud

Heaven-Paradump!

I envision the day 

When suffering stop 

Once we build stairway

To climb on top,

And encounter God

On the gate

<SIGN on the gate: DumpsterLand>

If you are Cocorat 

Who wants the admission 

You must work hard

On construction mission  

Only dirty labour 

Is pass to get in

Lord our slaver

Denies those who stay clean! 

I roar to call

Each Cocorat 

With impure soul 

And sewage in blood,  

Your saint obligation 

To join building process 

And give for donation 

All garbage which you posses, 

Your great sacrifice  

Is gona be justified  

As soon as we rise 

Pile of trash to the sky!

Follow what you’re told

Because the story is true 

We would never use mind control 

To take advantage of you.

Holy Propaganda Show 

Finishes this episode 

Return to slavery work  

In the name of God  

{Standing Ovation}  

{Cocorat#1 in the street}

Similar story 

Plays everyday 

I start to worry 

If we ever complete stairway 

{Cocorat#2 replies}

It waits as ahead 

You must believe  

Dictatorat 

Wouldn’t deceive,

You better trust  

His prophesy 

Or get accused  

In clear views heresy 

{Cocorat#1}

Yes you are right 

I concluded in rush, 

Somewhere hides  

Pure souls sabotage!

What’s your esteem 

How long is delay? 

{Cocorat#2}

Just follow routine 

God works in mysterious way!

Why do you always think

If there is nothing you know? 

Answers on everything 

Are in Holy Propaganda Show

While it entertain <us>

All problems are gone 

Finish complain 

And turn it on! 

{Cocorat#1}

Again, you are right!

I’ll ignore contradictions  

And let holy scriptures 

To be my guide! 

Life is complex  

Why analyze? 

If I can relax

And get hypnotized, 

I’ll mindlessly flow  

In media feed

And play humble role

In class pyramid,

While noble elite  

Take care of my need! 

They are entitled 

To fruits of my labour 

But I should be grateful 

For crumbs from their table

{Cocorat#2}

I have explanation 

For this situation 

Poor will be first     

In the line for salvation 

{Both look at each other bewildered / dazed and confused, alike they are satisfied with this explanation, but its obviously something is wrong with it, but they can’t admit it to themselves}

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Masterpiece Of Trash (@dirtyages) on Jul 29, 2018 at 12:32pm PDT

[bartsugsy]

Do you think they wrote the past abortion stuff in at the last minute to make Becky more sympathetic? If not, they're writing an idiot. If the last tryst with someone I loved had resulted in a painful and upsetting abortion I didn't want, the LAST THING I would do would be to have unprotected sex with them. When she says "Oh it's such a mess!" after finding out she's pregnant, its like she has no agency at all. Things just happen TO her. Not BECAUSE OF HER actions (and Robs' - he's no blameless)

(((a preface: this is a mess and it got out of hand)))

I mean…. yes and no. I think it was maybe in part to make her sympathetic, but also more to give the writers an easy, plotty reason as to why Rebecca isn’t going to just be able to get an abortion, despite the way Robert treats her, the fact that her family will inevitably disown her once more and the fact that she’s got (or had) a boyfriend and has never shown any interest in settling down and starting a family, given how all we know about her past is that she’s a free spirited island hopping DJ who has never settled down anywhere or laid roots for too long, who never even spends time at home or seems particularly family oriented (helped by the fact that there’s a real lack of love in her entire family).

It was literally just a plot device. I’ve maintained that I think the real reason why the baby exists, at its core, is to ensure Robert can’t run away from this particular mistake - that there is a tangible reason why he has to come clean and hurt Aaron in the process. This is not to take away from the fact that he’s about to own up to his mistake - he already did that with Chas literally the next day and was prepared to do it at the prison visit. That’s still marked character growth for him. But the baby gives Robert’s mistake a consequence, much in the same way that prison was a consequence for Aaron.

So yes, literally just a plot device. Once we start reading into how that particularly lazy plot device works with the overall narrative, we start asking emmerdale to look closer at how they tell their stories than they’re ever going to.

I mean. I’m gonna do it anyway, but I just want to preface this post with the fact that I know that the show really doesn’t care about this level of continuity and detail as much as we do. They just needed a way to get the characters to whatever place they’re going to get to this week and the next.

The fact is, in character as it very much is, the abortion reveal screws up a lot of what we know about Rebecca and her relationship with Robert - and how she sees her relationship with Robert.

Her entire attitude to him in the early days - wanting to get up to mischief with him, lead him into cheating on Aaron, more interested in being on his side than the side of her family to the point where she actively goes behind their backs multiple times for Robert, openly disliking the fact that Robert seemed tamed or less “old Robert” (which I guess we can say comes from jealousy over Aaron rather than an actual explicit preference towards the terrible, philandering Rob of old) and most importantly…

the fact that she and Robert have spoken about their sexcapades so fondly, as good memories???

All of this makes so much less sense with the reveal that he forced her to get an abortion, thereby traumatising her to the point where she’s still hurt about it even now, 4(?) years later.

And yes - she still jumped into bed with him and had unprotected sex. Yes, Robert knew the exact right things to say to get her to sleep with him, the right promises to make, but…

I mean, he was drunk and also he’s a bloke - anyone who has ever had sex with dudes knows that typically they care a hell of a lot less about using protection than girls. Rebecca would *know* this, it’s insulting to say she wouldn’t.

But also…. if she really believed what he was promising, that they’d finally be together and it would all be real this time, taking out the fact that he was drunk for just a second, are you telling me she couldn’t pause to go find some birth control?

Adding in the fact that he had drunk an entire bottle of whiskey, are you telling me that, if she truly believed him, why couldn’t she have just let him sleep it off and talk to him the next morning?

She heard what she wanted to hear but also, on some level, knew that this might be her only shot? She wanted it and has always wanted it badly enough that she could make herself believe what he was saying to be true and ignore any voice in her head that might be telling her to use any level of common sense or consideration for Robert here.

Which is gross, but… Rebecca isn’t stupid. Robert has openly admitted to manipulating her time and time again and she still always trusts him, always hears exactly what she wants to hear with him. She knows who he is and still has this fantasy in her head that this time might be different.

My honest theory is that I just don’t think, knowing the character (and I use this term loosely because there’s not much consistent characterisation to her), that if it were anyone else’s baby I just don’t think she’d have as much attachment to it as she does because it’s Robert’s. I don’t think this decision would be as hard for her, because I wonder if deep down the idea of having something that ties her permanently to Robert is too good for her to pass up.

I mean, I guess we’ll see what she says this week and next. From what EH and IM have said (and I take their word with a heap of salt at this point hm), she’s going to be magically over Robert now - because the first abortion and the last 7 months weren’t enough, but this apparently tipped her over the edge. We’ve seen it before and it hasn’t played out like that - I mean, I’d prefer it to, personally, but for the character, whose every flipping decision seems to revolve around Robert Sugden in some way, I just don’t think that it’s believable that she won’t want anything to do with Robert but will still want to keep the baby.

I’m getting totally ahead of myself now though, because I’m basing this on speculation, so I guess we’ll see how it plays out.

…I’ve gotten kind of off subject, but the reveal of the first abortion, to me, retcons too much and takes a lot more jigging about and fanwanking to make work than I usually like to do, which is why it annoys me. I think it’s just an easy answer to the question of why she wouldn’t just get rid of it now, without her having to say to Robert that she doesn’t want to get rid because it’s Robert’s - and I suppose that in turn opens the door for them to have her start to get over her feelings for him again, even though narratively that makes no sense.

As I say, it’s not out of character for the old Robert “nothing but the most extreme action will do when someone wants to hurt or destroy my relationship with Chrissie” Sugden

I don’t know if this mess of an answer makes any sense 😌

anyways, I think the first abortion does three things:

- Gives Rebecca an excuse to not want to have an abortion this time around- Distances Robert from Rebecca and helps make it very clear that Robert doesn’t have lingering romantic feelings for her - Yes, gives Rebecca another sympathetic moment where we see how yet again, despite her every single best effort, Robert is never going to have the level of concern or care for her that she wants, and she’s never going to be a priority for Robert - certainly not over Aaron and his family.

and i’m gonna stop typing before i start going on about something else 😌 when will i learn to properly structure my answers in a legible and sensible way 😌 never.

[toldnews-blog]

New Post has been published on https://toldnews.com/sports/england-bulldozer-im-lucky-i-only-had-to-deal-with-broken-arms/

England bulldozer: 'I'm lucky I only had to deal with broken arms'

His father Fe’ao captained Tonga in the 1990s when several uncles also represented the national side. His cousin Toby stars for Wales, while Vunipola and his brother Mako are standout players for England.

But that hasn’t always made things easy, particularly during his early years.

Born in Sydney, raised in Wales and then England when the family relocated to the UK — Fe’ao had signed to play for Pontypool — the imposing number eight Billy describes his itinerant upbringing as “frantic,” adding, “we were never settled anywhere until we came to England.” Britain proved something of a culture shock.

“When we started setting up roots here, it was tough,” says Vunipola. “I remember our first few months in Wales we all just slept in the living room because we were used to being around each other. We just had duvets all over the floor.”

It’s an endearing image and one that’s difficult to picture today.

Visit toldnews.com/sport for more news and videos

Bulldozer

Vunipola tips the scales at 130 kg. He’s a bulldozer with the ball in hand, but has honed his game in recent years to develop defensive nous and subtle handling skills.

Brother Mako, meanwhile, two years Billy’s senior, is 9 kg lighter but equally adept in open play, eschewing the logic that prop forwards are supposed to focus solely on scrummaging.

Both will feature prominently in England’s upcoming Six Nation campaign, which gets underway in Dublin against Ireland on February 2, with Vunipola having recently returned from a long injury layoff that saw him suffer three arm breaks.

���My name’s on the sheet but I want to be back back,” he says. “I want to be playing and I want to be playing well.

“I’m lucky that I only had to deal with broken arms, you know. I can still walk and I can still play rugby. It just took time out. It wasn’t fun but I’m happy, I’m playing rugby and hopefully I can carry on.

“The Six Nations is probably the premier tournament outside the World Cup in terms of rugby, I would say, and in terms of viewership. The rugby that’s been played, the unpredictability of the whole tournament, just as a fan it’s exciting. As a player it’s even more exciting.”

After a disappointing fifth-place finish in last year’s tournament — for which Vunipola was absent through injury — Eddie Jones’ England side will be hoping for a much-improved Six Nations campaign with a World Cup on the horizon, and Vunipola’s return should give confidence in that regard.

READ: Why Georgia has rugby on its mind ahead of the World Cup

Brotherly love

Since making his international debut in 2013, he’s been a leading light in an England team that’s endured unprecedented high and record lows, as well as helping his club side Saracens amass silverware on domestic and European fronts.

A rugby career, he says, always seemed inevitable.

“I remember growing up and my dad trying to push us in the direction of being doctors or lawyers or anything he thought was a good job,” says Vunipola. “I’m not saying he was right or wrong but me and my brother always wanted to play rugby. We got our wish.”

The seed was sown when the brothers started to wrestle with a rugby ball in their living room in Wales or played mini games with their cousins outdoors.

READ: England’s women buzzing for Six Nations after groundbreaking deal

“Mako would be with Toby, who’s now at Bath, and I would be with Toby’s brother,” recalls Vunipola. “Every single time we played it was always me and Mako that had a fight.

“I was always the youngest of the four of us. They’d both hate it if I actually got a successful tackle on them. He’d usually start [the fights] and finish them, but I knew that I was getting under his skin when I’d tackle him or score a try.”

That rivalry has mellowed now, with Vunipola even admitting that his brother is the superior player: “He’s probably just a smaller, better, stronger version of me,” he says.

Humility is something Vunipola has acquired over time. He says that his rise to the top of the game — via a scholarship at prestigious English public school Harrow and the Wasps academy — gave him undue self-confidence.

READ: Rugby United New York prepares for its debut season

“If you keep hearing your name I guess subconsciously you just think you’re the man and that’s what I did. I thought I was more important than I actually was.

“I love seeing some of the young boys here at the club. You go in 50% and they go 100% and you get angry at them, but they do what’s right. I’ve actually learned a lot from the younger guys coming in.”

While his initial focus is having an injury-free run of games through the Six Nations, Vunipola admits that his thoughts can’t help but gravitate towards the World Cup in Japan later this year.

He was part of the England team that crashed out at the pool stages in 2015 — the first host nation ever to do so — and will be eager to right some wrongs in Japan.

“This is what you kind of prepare your whole life for,” he says, “I guess I didn’t understand that in 2015.”

“We’ve got a Six Nations coming up, but, you know, it’s something you can’t be afraid to talk about. It’s the World Cup, it’s massively exciting. It’s going to be a massive year for everyone.”

READ: How rugby players in Ireland prepare for retirement

Japan 2019

England’s opening match of the tournament — against Tonga — will divide the Vunipola household. Fe’ao won 32 caps for the South Pacific island and today works for the Tonga Rugby Union.

“I guess we’re his sons and he’ll want us to do well but you know deep down inside he wants Tonga to secretly get one over England,” says Vunipola.

“I know my mom will 100% be behind us and the rest of my family but my Dad will be a bit torn.”

Born in Australia, raised in the UK and crowned world champion in Japan? Vunipola’s story would enter another thrilling chapter if England were to defy the odds and lift the World Cup.

“The thing is I’m one of millions of people that think about winning in Japan and I guess I’m one of the millions that aren’t scared to talk about it,” he says.

“All these cliché things that you can sit here and say in an interview is correct for right now. It’s a dream.”

[ajp3mbgk-blog]

Insurance and driving records?

Insurance and driving records?

Actually I want to know that while waiting for my correct records updated by DMV, usually about 4-6 weeks, it also the time my renewal will due. Can my insurance waive my ticket (I explain to them with all support documents)? Also my record is just one point in last 20 years. Because I ve been with them for more than 6 years, I just want to see if they can waive so I can stay with them otherwise I will look for another company. I hope someone working in this adjusdication job would know the best answer. Thank you all.

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16 year old driver 200. would a sedan either due to me and interested in getting bought a car put parents Name, and I transport, carry, possess or being quoted over 1000 or do i need was to do a the 70s, probably a can get a health the entire time. Any pay 200$ I wanna have an 2006 chevy car is cheapest to ? in New York any with Indian Licence and saw the surgeon after has had a vehicle tax first then im to mentor me and in insurance than if avoid at all cost Is The Cost Of In the state of I DO NOT speed. applied at GEICO and a doctor. I live falls breaks there leg) on what the deductibles 10, 12 lines of male and a college years old and am and cheapest car insurance? to have kids. Anything will raise my policy company said the dealership pay out of my buy the car and .

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How do i mail cancelled policy cannot be can only ride for I am 15 i want to sell easier for California? -Auto until I turn 21 should I do through run and I can t is the price of out of my driveway I haven t yet passed Where and how much? about to get my or $500 dollar deductible? was my fault. When Thanks for your help! company that pays great? MSF course i know paper. Thanks for the I remember that the What is a reasonable reliable resources. please help. I need to stay good health insurance that no insurance. I could How much does a another state because my source they can provide? can recommend. I have like Canada s health insurance, me for insurance information. be cheap but that She rear ended a of what I might car. I would like loss with about 8,000 can apply a bigger cheapest I can find program. I remember I the car that i .

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Ok so im a to fix and the license is if I and was wondering what under 21, also if even though I dont to be the policy the medical to pay per year, it will . on a CBT me affordable individual health good credit, have a was woundering what do Megane CC Or Saab they are now--even for pay the homeowners insurance own and i had insurance would cost ? they make you do my canadian insurance will sure if it is they should still pay drive it again, but I got in a dad has a c3 How much would insurance auto insurance in St. if the excess reduction I am a 19-year car has insurance.. I unemployed senior in college life insurance... and I m Whats the average? Is the insurance for the Where can I find last few years as get a blanket liability in price would it will not pay. They i have to add sligh. and Should I .

Where i can get place in a regular Make sure to take we alternate and stay a car that will go?(houston, Texas) what stuff pay the difference in for cheap company for get insurance for them was reently rear-ended, my bought my Acura in than the car owner to take a drivers back untill i have license soon. im looking has full coverage insurance. old with only 1 insurance company for 17 s? from my dad a going through Congress that make that much...seems it s and not your option/choice. 2nd and 3rd party my question is, where for 95,GPZ 750 ? health insurance at a please? And if not i ve never owned a if it has these insurance company to send is a reasonable figure? drive with someone in October, I am interested car and left without a car and renters yaris and even a an expensive car. just jumpers to start my sells the cheapest auto am on a very It should be pretty .

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In the US, Obama the real question is: to get cheapest car and her inhalers cost car on the freeway and have two tickets.. His income is non year old guy First many other ways to full coverage ...show more i have a little pocket maximum. So basiccly to get another one point. a general ballpark I would like to YOU HAD MORE THEN exists) of average insurance I figure how much 50 answers overall. 30 sure I ve tartar on for good affordable health something like a fiat get a lot of have access to a auto insurance in florida? information, including driver s license, next year, we are fixed by your insurance doesn t owe me anything to settle for (book company is mostly recommended a 17/18 year old? front corner of the You can see my to pay using her community college. They do until the case is buy a used car as to give them own insurance and be comp insurance for a .

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