#arthurian incorrect quotes

[oneshoulderangel]

Arthur: Merlin says insane stuff all the time! How was I supposed to know this one was true?

Merlin: If anyone sits in this chair, they’ll die.

Arthur: See!

[escespace]

Arthur: I know he might seem clumsy,disrespectful and idiotic but he is not a traitor.

Merlin: jeez... What have I done to earn such a good defense?

Arthur: Shut up Merlin, I'm trying to prove that you didn't break the law.

Merlin: Well, you certainly believe that so that's half the battle won.

[h0bg0blin-meat]

*The Knights cleaning up* Gwaine: Pick up the nearest piece of trash and throw it away. Arthur, to Merlin: Aight, which bin do you wanna go in—

[ofstarsandmoonlightt]

Bree: You're smiling, did something good happen?

Selwyn: Can't I just smile because I feel like it?

William: Valec tripped and fell in the parking lot

[incorrection-quotation]

The Lord Bertilak after Gawain kisses him: *Dang, this man was literally too nice to sleep with my wife*

Sir Gawain blushing profusely: *kissing two people in one day? What am I? A whore!?*

[thatdamhobbit]

Perry: So, apparently the “bad vibes” I’ve been feeling are actually severe psychological distress.

And also

Gwen: How many kids do you have?

Perry: Biologically, legally or emotionally?

And

Perry: Please, I’m begging you, go to a doctor

Morgan: I’m sorry is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it

And

Morgan: You’re my best friend and I would do anything for you

Dai: Eat three full meals a day and have a healthy sleep schedule.

Morgan: Absolutely not.

[gringle-pringle]

It’s been pointed out to me that the entire merlin series is just merlin being Perry the platypus.

Merlin takes off his neckerchief

“A servant?”

Merlin puts on his scarf:

“MERLIN THE SERVANT?!?”

Merlin’s eyes turn gold:

“EMRYS THE PROTECTOR OF THE ONCE AND FUTURE KING??!?!?”

[incorrectjttw]

Erlang Shen: Wow, left handed AND British? You really are an illusion.

King Arthur: ...thanks?

The East meets the West in the mythological realm and shit gets wild.

[15pantheons]

Lancelot: I am an expert at identifying birds.  Arthur: Okay, what about those ones flying over there?  Lancelot: Yeah, they're all birds. 

[marthalmary]

kidnapper: We have Princess Guinevere. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed

Guinevere: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars?

Arthur:

Guinevere: MAKE IT ONE MILLION–

Arthur: GUINEVERE STOP

[oneshoulderangel]

Lancelot: Sometimes, I get the feeling that you secretly hate me.

Kay: I don’t secretly hate you. I‘ve been very upfront about my distain for you. You’re just oblivious.

[escespace]

Gwaine: You know... Before, I kind of had a crush on Merlin

Arthur: ...

Arthur: that shit gets over?

[h0bg0blin-meat]

Merlin: WHO THE FUCK-

Arthur: Whoa, language!

Merlin: I speak fucking English!

Arthur: ...

[ofstarsandmoonlightt]

Bree: it's Valec's turn to pick for game night

Valec: we're all gonna sit in a circle and be nice to each other

Selwyn: that's not a game you moron

Valec: Sel is already losing

[sipthestarswithme]

Lancelot: I am no killer

Gawain: You just decapitated -

Lancelot: I simply sent him to God

Gawain: Yeah… that’s still murder, bud.

Lancelot: If God found it unjust, then he would resurrect this man.

Arthur: Has that… happened yet?

Lancelot: No. Which means I’m doing a good job.

[taliesin-the-bored]

Post-Camlann Incorrect Quote

Bedivere (to Arthur): I just fought in a battle for you, most of my friends are dead, you’re dying, I’m unemployed, the land is in turmoil and potential anarchy, Kay is I-don’t-know-the-heck where, you just killed my brother by hugging him, and I don’t even get to keep the darn sword?