#are you a mutual? or someone who wants to be one? bc I need friends so please do be my mutual
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hellsite-hall-of-fame · 1 year ago
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I know who you are
well that’s good- because I myself barely know who i am, aside from being a ✨mystery✨
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robotiv · 8 months ago
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can someone bleach my roots for me. id really appreciate it. Thank you love you
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albedobeheading · 1 year ago
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last day in Rome probably ever
#didn’t see the Vatican or statue of David but hey ya win some ya lose some#I still would not be surprised if I get a huge text from my friend after I leave saying that we’re no longer friends#I think I’ve said all of this stuff before#and it wasn’t even that like. I actively wanted to go home and was sad outwardly the whole time#my posts may beg to differ but I think like three days in it became a wanting to go home situation to be away from here#not back to where I wanted to be#I did go to a few churches and those were amazing every time and the one museum I went to was also very cool#maybe I also associate a lot of stress with my camera#I think my friend is also maybe just a bit narcissistic?? Ik everyone is the main character in their life but like. reminds me of my mom#when she exaggerates how scary something was or how a story only happened because of her#my friend always tells the story wrong of how we met where she makes herself the one who instigated the conversation but it actually was me#and I slightly helped my friend make mashed potatoes for thanksgiving and she made direct eye contact with me and said she did it all by#herself and the potatoes were actively trying to kill her#she also misgendered and deadnamed our mutual friend to her other friends and again I just#I’ve said this before and I know it is fucked but I am thankful and privileged that my gender fuckery is not so extreme that I can be#deadnamed. bc it really is your own people! and sure everyone is learning but!!!#and I also have not always been the ally I need to be and corrected people in the moment#that’s also its own thing of who people are out to so I’ve gotten better about asking if they use their pronouns with everyone or just with#friends at whatever point in their transition. even at that yanno#I think it’s called a red lie? where it hurts someone but benefits you? bc there were also times I didn’t want to have to explain#who is trans to my mom. depending on the day she’ll either be so phony and welcoming or just refuse to get it. anyway#half of that doesn’t relate to my current situation#I also do sometimes worry though if I’m coming off as self centered/ narcissistic if I take up space in convos or if I’m not checking on#people/ if I’m actively making a situation bad for others. the cop out answer would be to say that there’s a learning curve to this stuff#but I still need to be actively trying. I think I need to not be a bitch when I’m planning things bc sure even tho I sometime get stressed#it’s for all of the people I love that also love each other to hang out. what could possibly be bad about that#I’m gonna get up now
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pathologicalreid · 7 months ago
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gemini | S.R.
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two emotionally wrought people collide at a wedding, and a sexual escapade ensues.
part two
who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: smut (18+ mdni) content warnings: softdom!spencer, use of the term "good girl" (i couldn't help myself), unprotected sex, reader on bc, alcohol, spoilers for 14x15 truth or dare, lowkey idiots in love, fucking against a wall?, fingering, heavy petting, r has an oral fixation, r is wearing a dress and makeup, explicit consent (hot), public sex, i think that's all word count: 3.42k a/n: this is a little self-indulgent and i don't care! based on literally just the first line of the song gemini by del water gap. probably not ever gonna get a part two. i've never done angsty smut (smangst?) before, so this was fun.
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so, here's the setting, we met fucked up at a wedding
Swirling the drink you held in your hand, you watched your friends as they chatted. The pink liquid in the cup, concocted by Penelope Garcia, was far too sweet for your taste, but you needed the liquid courage to make it through the wedding.
It wasn’t that you weren’t happy for Krystall and Dave. It was that weddings oftentimes left a bitter taste in your mouth – one so bitter that not even Penelope’s drink could offset it.
In your periphery, you saw a blur of purple in the corner, looking up to see Spencer. His hand still bandaged from his most recent brush with death, he used his free one to grip a glass of water. Raising your eyebrows, you gave him your best attempt at a smile before you greeted him, “You look good, Dr. Reid.”
He was fully donned in his favorite color, and you tried to pretend that you didn’t notice that your dress matched the purple hue of his suit. “Thanks,” he said shortly, not quite meeting your eyes.
Noting the way he was looking past you, you demurely leaned your head down, glancing over your shoulder so that you could see what he was looking at, only to see JJ. She looked gorgeous in her red dress, laughing at something her husband said before her eyes caught something.
She was staring back at Spencer, and not for the first time, you found yourself wondering what happened in that pawn shop. Bringing your eyes back up to Reid, you watched the confused look in his eyes bloom as he peeled his eyes away from JJ.
Sick of it, you spoke up, “Alright, I had dibs on being the mopey one tonight. What’s wrong?” You had wanted to brush it off as long-lasting nerves from the hostage situation, but he was acting strange.
You knew you weren’t his best friend, that was a title that JJ had been the reigning champion of since the beginning of time. Yet, you still noticed the rigidity in Spencer’s shoulders as he displayed a clear discomfort with his surroundings. You tried to think of something to say to him. How could you ask him if he wanted to get out of here without it sounding like a sexual proposition?
“JJ told me she loved me,” he said, his voice so low you weren’t even sure you had heard him correctly.
Your head snapped up, “Oh.” Swallowing thickly, you tilted your head curiously, letting loose hair tumble to the side. “Do you love her?” Likely not the right conversation for the wedding of everyone’s favorite right-person-wrong-time couple, but you were desperate for a rope to pull yourself out of your wallowing.
He took a sip of his water before setting the empty glass on the bar counter, “I did.” The admission hit you like a ton of bricks, until her continued, “but now…”
Filling in the blanks, you shrugged, “She’s married. They have kids.” Spencer was always doing the right thing, so pushing his feelings aside for the sake of JJ’s family made the most sense.
Furrowing his brows, he pondered this for a moment before speaking, “It’s not just that. I have feelings for someone else.”
“Oh,” you repeated, and somehow the thought of him being in love with an unfamiliar figure hurt more than him being in love with your mutual friend.
The both of you let the conversation lag, watching as Penelope came back up to the bar and poured more drinks. After she accused you of being boring for not wanting another drink, everyone returned to the tables. “Have you dated anyone since him?”
You choked on your newly acquired water, cupping your hand underneath your jaw in an attempt to stop water from getting on your dress. “Uh, no. I’ve kind of sworn off dating ever since,” you replied, shaking your hand out and letting water droplets fall to the floor.
Sighing, you slouched in your seat, remembering that all you’d ever be was a jaded bride. Left by your fiancé on the day of your wedding, doomed to never love again. Until you met Spencer Reid.
“For everyone?” Spencer asked, and you cursed his natural curiosity.
His question caught you off guard. Despite yourself, you shook your head, “I have like… one person who, if they asked me, I’d say yes.” Your skin started to feel warm, and you weren’t sure if it was your proximity to him or Penelope’s drink coming back with a vengeance.
Spencer stepped a little closer to you, leaning casually on the counter as if he wasn’t affecting your ability to focus. “Who’s your person?” The question was innocent enough that it made your heart ache.
“It doesn’t matter, he’s into someone else,” you told him, reaching behind your neck to pull your hair up, haphazardly twisting it. You didn’t have a hair tie, so you let the locks fall once you felt some semblance of relief.
This statement seemingly bothered Spencer because he looked into his glass, “Did he tell you that?”
Nodding, you chewed on the inside of your lip. “Yeah,” maybe not in so many words, Spencer was rarely crass enough to say he was into someone, but you understood well enough.
The conversation lagged between the two of you once again, your own private thoughts were only interrupted when the music changed. It was a slow song, one for the couples of the night to dance to.
You took a chance, “Do you want to go explore the building with me? It’s getting stuffy in here,” you said, taking one final swig of your water before jumping up from your stool.
He looked back at JJ, who was there with Will, and then forward to the girl who was asking to take him away, “Yes.”
David Rossi had spared no expense for his second wedding to his third wife, and the manor that you found yourself meandering within felt never-ending. Something about following Spencer as he led the way and told you facts about the history of the building felt so normal, and you wondered if it would hurt when the night was over. Maybe this would just end as another memory to loathe about weddings.
Trailing him into another room, you stumbled into his back. Quickly, Spencer spun back and caught you before you could fall to the ground.
Steadying yourself, your heart thrummed at the way he was touching you, tightly holding your waist so that you wouldn’t trip. Once you were no longer wobbling, Spencer reached up and gingerly lifted the fallen spaghetti strap of your dress back over your shoulder. Before you had fully thought out your actions, you leaned up on your tip toes and kissed him.
It was hesitant and gentle, but once you registered that you were kissing him you soon realized that he was kissing you back. What started out as a small peck on the lips quickly morphed into full, open-mouthed kisses.
You thought Spencer might eat you alive, and for a moment, you thought you might let him.
Without separating your lips, he herded you over to the wall, pinning your hips to the wall as you felt heat grow between your legs.
Pulling at your bottom lip with his teeth, Spencer pulled away ever so slightly, your faces just inches apart. “Is this okay?” He asked you, his eyes flickering down to your lips like he was holding himself back from kissing you again.
There was fear. A fear that if you moved forward tonight, nothing would ever be the same, but you took a chance  and nodded quickly, “Yes.”
Your answer acted as a release as Spencer dropped his head back down and the two of you reattached your lips. Despite your attempts to ignore it, you felt his hardened length pressing into you through several layers of clothes.
Twisting your head away, you gasped as Spencer took the opportunity to place his lips on your neck, gently suckling on the tender skin as you tried to catch your breath. “Are you sure about this?” You breathed, running your hands underneath his suit jacket, wanting nothing more than to push it off of him.
“Yes,” he answered, giving you the same consent that you had already given him, and it was enough for you to reach for his belt buckle. No matter how badly you wanted to see him entirely bare in front of you, this just wasn’t the place for it.
Gently, you slid your hand down his front, savoring the way his breath hitched against your neck as your fingertips precariously lifted the waistband of his boxers. He gently nipped at your earlobe as you wrapped your hand around the base of his cock.
You let your head fall backward, allowing him better access to your neck as you moved your hand. Moving your hand up so that you could swipe your thumb over the tip.
You dragged your other hand down, pulling his boxers down so that you could get a good look at what you were working with, and biting your lip at the sight of it. Slowly, you started to pump his impressive length, noting how his breathing patterns changed with your movements.
Dragging a knuckle up the underside of him, he dropped his head to your shoulder as you collected his pre-cum on your index finger on your way up, bringing your hand up to your mouth and licking the droplet off, peering up at him.
“You’re so good at that, baby,” he told you, sighing as he reached up and placed his hand on the side of your neck, skimming his thumb over your jawline as his free hand started to make its way up your dress, pausing when he only met bare skin. “No underwear?” He questioned, furrowing his brow at you as you bit your lip, trying to refrain from pressing into his hand.
Whimpering almost indiscriminately, you shook your head, “Couldn’t, panty lines would show under the dress.”
Spencer hummed in recognition, moving his hand up to cup your sex so that you could feel your own wetness on his hand. A pathetic whine escaped your throat as your walls clenched with need, still stopping yourself from grinding on his hand. “What do you need?” He asked, a teasing lilt in his voice, “Come on, you can tell me.”
“You, please,” you answered, your voice dangerously bordering on pleading. “Your hands, anything,” you squeaked out, breathing heavily as you awaited his next move.
Gently, he slipped a finger inside your wet hole, causing you to release a satisfied sigh. “You’re so wet,” he whispered in your ear as you tilted your head back and pressed your lips to his.
As his hand picked up in pace, so did your breathing. With each movement of his hand, you struggled to keep your volume at a respectable level, small whimpers continued escaping you even as you bit down on the inside of your lip. “Spence,” you whined, moaning aloud as he slipped a second finger into you, “Oh, god.”
The silence of the room around you only exacerbated the wet sounds that were emanating from your sex, and if it didn’t feel so good, you might’ve been embarrassed. In fact, as you felt a familiar coil winding in your abdomen, you found that you didn’t have the capacity to feel anything other than pleasure.
Crying out, you nodded as Spencer continued to thrust his fingers in and out of you, “Fuck,” you said, caring less about your volume levels. Even less so when he responded by pressing the heel of his hand against your clit, the pressure proving to be enough to send you over the edge.
“It’s okay,” Spencer whispered in your ear, “Let it go for me, baby.” His words continued as you felt your walls spasming around his fingers, his ministrations had slowed, but he worked you through your orgasm before withdrawing his fingers and lifting them up to your mouth.
Accepting the invitation, you leaned forward and sucked the sweet juices off of his hand, slipping your tongue between his two fingers as you looked up at him. You half expected him to be watching you with lust-blown eyes, but he was watching you just as attentively as he had when you started this escapade.
He retrieved his fingers from your mouth with a satisfying pop and reached down to ruche the fabric of your dress up around your waist. “Wait,” he said suddenly, gripping the silky cloth, “I don’t have a condom.”
Your eyes widened and you shook your head, “I don’t mind.” Still breathing heavy from your previous orgasm, you shook your head again, “I mean. I’m on birth control – and I’m good at it. I mean I keep up with it.” Now babbling, you hoped he’d say something. “I’m clean. I trust you.”
Nodding in understanding, he placed a hand on the side of your neck and looked at you intently. “I’m not going to do anything until you catch your breath,” he told you, taking up an authoritative tone.
Blinking rapidly, you evened out your breathing as he ran his hand up and down your torso, “I’m sorry,” you whispered, taking another deep breath as you looked up at him.
Spencer shook his head, “Don’t be sorry.” He leaned his head down, pressing soft kisses down the side of your neck as you finally pushed his jacket off of his shoulders. “You’re so pretty,” he murmured, leaning down to grip the backs of your thighs.
“It’s okay if you can’t lift me,” you rambled quickly, getting his attention as you aired your concern.
He raised his eyebrows expectantly, pressing his hips into yours and lifting your feet off of the ground. The leverage that he had, along with the support of the wall behind him, allowed him to get both of your feet off of the ground. You would’ve spent more time being impressed by this feat if you weren’t so distracted by his painfully hard cock that had now slipped between your folds.
Leaning down, you desperately kissed his lips, wanting him to give you those open-mouthed kisses that you had started out with. Instead, you cried out when, without warning, his full length slipped into you.
Placing gentle kisses on your collarbone, Spencer murmured, “Are you okay?” He whispered, seeming like he was using all of his self-control to just stay still.
You nodded, feeling his cock throbbing so deep in you that you were almost afraid you’d come from just that pressure alone. “Been a while,” you murmured, taking a deep, shaky breath.
He hummed in understanding, “I’ve got you, take your time.”
His words filled your stomach with butterflies, and it wasn’t just because he was fully sheathed in you. “Spence,” you whimpered, “Move.”
On your cue, Spencer gave a tentative thrust, permitting your resulting moan to mix with his grunt. “Fuck, baby,” he said, continuing to thrust in and out of your cunt, filling the room with the crude squelching of your actions. “I’m not going to last long,” he informed you.
Throwing your head back in ecstasy, you moaned helplessly when Spencer dropped one of your legs to the ground, hooking his arm underneath your other knee, providing a new, deeper angle. You swore as the sensations started to feel overwhelming.
The new angle gave him more control over his movements, enabling him to use his free hand to pull at your breast through the fabric of your dress. As you tugged gently at his hair, you tilted your head back, “Spence, I- shit,” you cursed, recognizing the tell-tale signs of your second orgasm approaching.
If it weren’t for his words of encouragement, you would’ve been embarrassed by coming too quickly, and if anything, the words only spurred you closer to the finish line. “Come for me,” he said, thrusting harder into you as he tried to reach the same point. “Let me know how good I make you feel,” he said, continuing his thrusts until his hips stuttered.
“Coming,” you whimpered, dropping your head forward onto his shoulder as you felt your walls tightening around his hard length. Crying out as he continued to pound into you, you buried your face into his neck and nipped at the skin to muffle your sounds.
Now he was solely working toward his own orgasm, having given you two of your own. “You’re such a good girl,” he panted.
Suckling gently at the skin on his neck – not hard enough to leave a mark, you littered kisses on his sensitive skin. “Come in me, baby,” you murmured, trying to spur him on.
Your success was apparent as his movements faltered and his cock started throbbing, feeling the pulses of his cum as it filled you, your eyes rolled back at the feeling while Spencer slowed to a halt, waiting for a beat before he pulled out of you entirely.
Shuddering at the emptiness you now felt, you leaned against the wall once both of your feet were on the ground. As your legs trembled, you watched as Spencer crouched to fish something out of his jacket, leaving you with your mixture of fluids running down your legs.
As he grabbed the handkerchief from his breast pocket, you gasped slightly as you realized his intentions. “Spence, you’ll ruin it,” you insisted.
“Would you rather go back out there with my cum dripping down your thighs?” He asked, knelt in front of you with his brows raised in mock innocence.
Swallowing thickly, you shook your head, “Jesus.”
He chuckled, using the handkerchief to wipe up the mess the two of you had made on your legs before carelessly tossing it into a nearby trashcan. Noting the way your legs were still shaking, he lifted your chin ever so slightly, “Are you alright?”
Nodding, you offered him a tired, but genuine smile. “I’m great,” you told him, wiping underneath your eyes where you were sure there was a mess of mascara.
Taking your hand in his, as if it was the most normal thing in the world, Spencer led to toward the French doors that led to the balcony, taking you out into the fresh air.
As you leaned up against the railing, Spencer shook out his jacket and draped it over your shoulders, doing his best to keep you comfortable. “Hey,” you whispered, “I really am fine. Are you? How’s your hand?” In all of the hormones, you had forgotten about his injury.
Spencer nodded, looking over the property that Rossi had rented. “I’m good, Y/N. I feel good.” You wished he’d call you baby again, but maybe that was too much to ask for. His eyebrows furrowed.
“What are you thinking about?” You asked him, recognizing the look from years of working together.
He hummed, reaching up and sweeping a strand of hair off of your forehead. “That guy? The one who told you he’s into someone else? I can confidently say he’s an idiot.”
Flushing, you smiled to yourself at the fact that Spencer was calling himself an idiot, especially when he was anything but. Shrugging, you waved him off anyway, “Nobody’s perfect, Spence.”
“No, I suppose not, but even so…” he told you, allowing his voice to trail off like he wasn’t totally sure what he wanted to say to you. “If he can’t see what’s right in front of him, then maybe you need to turn your attention elsewhere.”
Sighing, you leaned your chin in your hand, “Thanks, but I don’t know. Maybe there is better out there, and I’m just not worth it.” No, after tonight, you’d likely never get over him. It might’ve started as a workplace crush, but you felt in your heart that it was now something deeper.
Spencer shook his head, “Now, that’s where we disagree.”
“Spencer, I can’t-“ Your voice is cut off when you hear someone calling your name from inside the building, smoothing out the front of your dress one more time, you step back into the room, coming face to face with JJ.
She smiles in recognition of you, but the grin immediately fades from her face when Spencer walks out behind you, “Hey, we’ve been looking for you guys,” she said flatly. “They’re about to cut the cake.”
Nodding, you took another quick look at Spencer before following the blonde out of the room, leaving your secret in the room behind you.
part two
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proudfreakmetarusonikku · 9 months ago
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Anyway, while people are discoursing about men and not sharing Shubble points, here’s the actual advice I got from watching the stream bc I think that probably needs to be spread more. Shubble elaborates it much better but if you can’t watch it’s better than nothing.
Physical abuse is not just hitting or kicking, anyone causing physical pain intentionally to you without consent is physically abusive, regardless of how that manifests or if it seems silly.
Pressuring someone into using a safeword on something that’s not, like, a mutually agreed thing and is just something one partner wants is controlling and creepy.
Partners who push at the edge of your boundaries and avoid safewords are abusive.
A partner insisting you’re remembering things wrong and making you seem crazy is abusive (specifically, it’s gaslighting)
Grand romantic gestures from the beginning can very easily be a sign of abuse, as abusers use it to endear themselves to their victims.
Controlling behaviour and refusing to break up while also refusing to make changes is possessive and unhealthy at best.
Abusers will manipulate things to make it seem normal to those outside of their victims- by being kind and helpful even as they neglect their victim, by pressuring their victim to treat their abusive behaviour as a joke, ect. It’s often very hard for an outside observer to know if something is abusive, and making assumptions off of what you know in front of closed doors isn’t helpful.
It’s very hard to tell that you’re being abused, and you'll often still retain affection for your abuser for a long time- this is normal, and this isn’t your fault if you wanted to stay friends.
Even if an abuser is struggling with their own problems, taking it out on you is not acceptable. People can be bottling up their emotions and struggle with depression and past trauma and that gives them no excuse to hurt you.
If your partner relies entirely on you to take care of them, and support them financially, that’s financial abuse one way or another.
Abusers tend to hurt more than one person, and their actions escalate without outside influence (be it intervention if possible or something that keeps them away from victims if not.)
Listen to your gut, if you think a relationship is bad. Even if you’ve been through this before, sometimes you can’t realise in it, but you’ll feel it subconciously.
Also, Shubble is being supported by friends who helped her cope and went through different but similar things. She's specifically mentioned right now keeping the stories anonymised, but she might change her mind, if I interpreted the last bit correctly. She's doing alright, she's healing, and it sounds like she's being believed by her friends, at least most of them. I wish nothing but growth and healing for them, and wish them the best moving forward.
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buckymorelikefuckme · 2 months ago
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fri(end)s
bucky barnes x fem reader
words: 3.8k
warnings & tags: **18+ ONLY** friends/roommates to lovers oh my god they were roommates, smoking weed, brief mutual masturbation, frottage (i think that's the right word idfk i'm all out of practice), p in v sex, unprotected sex (don’t do that), reader has nipple piercings bc i said so, slight pain kink? mayhaps? ok pls let me know if i’ve missed anything!
a/n: i made this fic my bitch tonight. this is absolutely not proofread or beta'd, you're just gonna have to take it for what it is, sorry not sorry. anyway, it’s been too long since i wrote for this beefy man :’) i really hope you like it. this was originally very loosely inspired by a scene in what’s your number? but it quickly gained a mind of its own to become what it is now, so. there ya go. title is from the song of the same name by V of bts thank you very much. any and all mistakes are my own. feedback is greatly appreciated and heavily encouraged!!! xoxo
bucky barnes masterlist || main masterlist
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Bucky’s introduction to weed was something you’d been supremely proud of.
When the two of you became roommates, you both had been kind of quiet and kept to yourselves at first, which isn’t too unusual, but you noticed that Bucky almost always had a frown etched into his handsome face. A frown that only ever softened after a night out with his friends and, you assumed, a decent hook-up. It never took long for that frown to reappear, though.
You didn’t know what could have been so stressful for him, but you knew he needed a way to relax, and not just for himself, either. The sight of him glumly moving around the apartment—honestly, you’ve never seen someone make fixing a bowl of cereal look so fucking sad—was beginning to weigh on your own nerves.
So, naturally, you thought of asking him if he’s ever tried weed. Somehow, his frown had deepened at that question. He said no, shocking absolutely no one, and then you asked if he wanted to try it. Admittedly, he was a little hesitant at first, but he eventually agreed.
The way his body, all two hundred and whatever pounds of muscle and angst, sank into the recliner like a ragdoll when the high really hit him made you grin. Though, to be fair, you were already smiling, what with you also being high. It was the first time you saw a real, genuine smile from Bucky, and you were immensely pleased to have given him a way to decompress from whatever kept him so tense all the time.
It became a sort of thing for you two. Saturday nights were for getting high, binge-watching Love Island (UK, because you both have class, thank you very much) and raiding the pantry for all the good snacks when the munchies hit. You’d never tell anyone, but those nights quickly became something you looked forward to every week, something you could cling to when your own life got a little difficult. Who knew smoking weed—and on a few special occasions, doing edibles—with your roommate would make a friendship blossom so prettily?
***
After how late Bucky got in last night, you knew he’d be sleeping in and would more than likely have a hangover. So, for this particular Saturday morning, you get up and quietly start gathering your laundry while Bucky snores loudly into his pillow from his bedroom. You were getting behind on it anyway, down to your last pair of clean shorts.
Before you put them on, though, you purse your lips in thought, staring at your pile of dirty clothes. You didn’t want to put on clean shorts with the panties and shirt you slept in last night. It would be smarter to wash them with the rest of your clothes, right? But that would leave you topless, which, you wouldn’t exactly be opposed to it, but you’re not sure Bucky would appreciate waking up to you walking around with your tits out. Or maybe he would? Whatever, it doesn’t matter.
You shake your head to clear your thoughts and then remember that Bucky did his laundry yesterday, and knowing him, he probably left at least some of his clean clothes in the dryer. Surely he wouldn’t mind you borrowing a shirt.
With that plan in mind, you dump your clothes into your laundry basket and make your way down the hall to the doors where your washing and drying units are (a major selling point of the apartment, if you’re honest). Just like you thought, Bucky’s left a load in the dryer, and even some of his button-downs are hung up on the drying rack. You quickly pull your t-shirt off, shivering against the cool air, and reach for one of the hangers, slipping his shirt off of it and onto yourself. For a dress shirt, it’s actually quite comfortable, obviously one of the shirts he wears more often with how soft and a little worn the fabric is. You shimmy your panties down your legs and add them to your pile, grabbing your clean shorts and tugging them on, too.
You make quick work of starting your first load of clothes, closing the doors to muffle the sound of the washer, and head back to your room to do your morning routine. By the time you’re done and have also cooked yourself breakfast, Bucky is staggering down the hall and into the kitchen, hair a tangled nest atop his head and eyes bleary.
“Good morning, sunshine,” you greet with a teasing smile.
He flips you off and beelines for the coffee machine, pouring himself a cup and not speaking a word until he’s downed at least half of it. Part of you is concerned for his esophagus, but you’ve long since come to the conclusion that Bucky’s probably got a thing for pain—both physically and emotionally.
“Remind me to tell Sam he isn’t allowed to bring Natasha on our nights out anymore,” he grumbles, voice rough from both sleep and a long night of drinking. “I’ve never taken so many shots of vodka in my life.”
You hum. “Sounds like my kind of woman, actually.” He cuts his eyes at you, silently judging while taking another sip of his coffee. “Want me to fry up some bacon and eggs for you?” You almost laugh at the way his expression immediately switches to pleading.
The rest of the morning is spent finishing your laundry and putting it all away, even gathering up Bucky’s clothes that he’d left and dumping them on his bed. You’ll leave the folding to him, though; your generosity only extends so far, after all.
Lunch rolls around and you both decide to order takeout from the burger place down the street, Bucky shushing you when you keep insistently whispering for him to order extra truffle fries (which he does order, after you’ve sworn pain of death if he doesn’t) and once it arrives, the two of you settle around the coffee table in the living room, putting on a random movie to watch while you eat.
And of course, when the sun begins to lower on the horizon, you start pulling out your stash and getting everything ready. Bucky’s already got the windows open in the living room to let the smell air out as you smoke, and he also has Love Island queued up and ready to go.
While you smoke the first joint, you make the conscious decision to bake a small batch of brownies for later. Bucky sits on the counter beside you, passing the joint back and forth as he quietly watches you work. Wordlessly, you hand over the bowl and spoon to him after you’ve poured the batter into the awaiting pan. No matter how many times you’ve tried to warn him about salmonella he always insists on licking them clean.
Sometimes, in these moments, you forget how surly he used to be with you. Not that he was ever rude or anything, but he never would have pouted about not being able to eat raw brownie batter before you helped him break down some of those walls of his.
***
“He’s such a dick,” Bucky mumbles a while later, face impassive and tone bland as he refers to one of the islanders of the show, slouching so deeply into the couch he’s practically become one with it.
The high from the first joint is finally kicking in fully, doing its job of releasing every ounce of tension from your bodies. It’s also making your mouth dry and tummy rumble for snacks. Thank god you made those brownies and Bucky unearthed some candy from past movie nights and lots of chips out of the pantry cabinets.
You hum at his comment. “Most men are.”
Bucky turns his head in your direction with an affronted expression that has you snickering. He goes to reply, giving you the sassiest once-over you’ve ever seen, but his eyes doubletake on your torso and he pauses. He stares for a moment.
“That’s my shirt,” he states.
You look down at the shirt in question, of which you’ve worn all day long and somehow he’s only just now noticing.
“Wow, you’re like Sherlock Holmes or something,” you drawl.
Bucky stares some more, and then, “Why are you wearing my shirt?”
“Because I had laundry to do and I needed something to wear while all my stuff was washing,” you say in a “duh” tone.
“But…” He frowns. “It’s my favorite.”
You snort inelegantly. “Bucky, you literally have, like, at least four other white dress shirts.”
“So? What, I can’t have a favorite one just because I have more of the same color?”
“Christ,” you say on an exasperated exhale. “I’ll give it back before bed, okay? I don’t wanna move right now. I’m scared I’ll bump into stuff again.”
Bucky huffs a laugh at that, which turns into a full-blown giggle fit that is contagious. Soon after your shared laughter dies down, the conversation moves back to the illicit love triangles among the islanders. You trash talk the couple that Bucky likes, just to see him get riled up and rant about how they’re the most real couple of the season and everyone else is just jealous. He gets red in the face and pouty when you remind him that this is a heavily produced show about pretty people getting a chance to get famous for being pretty people by hooking up with each other and playing stupid games that mean nothing in the grand scheme of it all. Really, it’s quite cute.
To placate him, though, you get a second joint rolled and let him take the first hit.
***
Turns out this second one hits you rather harder than normal. It feels like your head is a balloon and your neck is the string tethering it to the rest of your body. Everything feels much more sluggish compared to all the other times you’ve gotten high with Bucky. Somewhere in the depths of your hazy brain you remember that you’d gotten a different brand this time around; perhaps that’s why.
On the tv, the islanders are getting ready for bed, and once the lights go out in their room, some of the couples engage in some serious heavy petting, lifting their comforters for a semblance of privacy. The sounds start next, sighs and low moans, and it all begins to settle into your subconscious. Between one lazy blink and the next, you realize you’re… actually kind of horny. It’s not enough for you to really pay attention to it, not at first, just a little sprinkle of it, a tiny twist in your core that briefly has you pressing your thighs together then relaxing again.
But then the arousal builds up inside you so slowly and easily that you don’t even realize your hand has apparently grown a mind of its own and found its way down your shorts. You inhale sharply at the touch of your fingers against your clit, lashes fluttering as the sensation registers. The sound gains Bucky’s attention from where he's been lounging on the opposite end of the couch with his head tipped back and eyes closed.
They’re not closed anymore. Out of your peripheral, you see his head shift in your direction, feeling the weight of his stare like a physical thing. Your mind is both connected and disconnected from your actions, half-aware that this is probably not the smartest thing to be doing, that you’re absolutely crossing a major boundary. Touching yourself in this way in front of your roommate, your friend, is so not normal.
Yet, for some idiotic reason, you leave your hand down your shorts, continuing to lightly pet at your clit, neediness rising steadily. Even though you know he’s watching—and suspiciously quiet—you can’t help but let your fingers slither down to where you’re beginning to drip to gather some of your slick and bring it back to your clit and swirling your fingers at a sedate pace, sighing as your nipples tighten underneath your shirt.
Bucky is as still as a statue, gaze honed in on the movement of your hand, on how your thighs ease open more and more the longer you play with your pussy.
It takes very little time for your eyes to wander over to the man just a couple feet away, and to then notice and fixate on the growing bulge in Bucky’s sweatpants. The weight of his stare is almost a physical thing and you swallow roughly as you think about what he might look like, if he’s at all how you’ve secretly imagined when you’re alone in your bedroom, in much the same position as you are in now.
His hands creep towards his thighs and smooth down the expanse of them and back up, slowly, over and over, like he’s teasing himself. Like he’s teasing you. Your fingers don’t stop as you lift your other hand to tweak and pinch at your nipples through well-worn cotton, a tiny noise slipping past your dry lips.
Bucky pulls the hem of his shirt up, exposing part of his toned stomach and only hesitates for a split second before he lowers the waistband of his pants, pulling his cock out and matching the pace of his strokes with the pace of your fingers. The head of his cock is pink and precum makes it shine under the low light of the lamps in the living room.
You bite your lip as your arousal increases from the sight alone, and you decide to follow his lead, just a bit. You whine from the loss of stimulation when you remove your hand to shimmy your shorts down and off your legs, letting them fall to the floor carelessly. And now, Bucky has an unrestrained view of your glistening cunt as you sink two of your fingers inside yourself and use your other fingers to rub all around your clit. It has you gasping, eyelids threatening to close through the pleasure that sparkles throughout every vein in your body.
It’s good. Amazing, even. And it’s only making you want more. Bucky, it seems, feels much the same.
“C’mere,” he rasps, tone leaving no room for arguing, never mind that you wouldn’t have argued anyway.
You sit up on the couch, knee-walking over to where he’s still in his slumped position, never pulling your hand away from your clit because it feels like you’d cry if you did. Bucky curses under his breath and lets go of his cock to firmly grab you by the hips and tug you onto his lap. Your pussy ends up aligned perfectly with his cock, and you both shudder as you begin gliding back and forth across it, small movements that only increase the suspense of what likely comes next. He meets your eyes, red and glazed over from both the high and the toe-curling feeling of his cock along your wet center.
The kiss, when it happens, tastes like weed and the peanut M&M’s you both were snacking on just a little while ago. Bucky's tongue licks into your mouth like he can’t get enough, nips at your bottom lip to hear you whimper, gets a fistful of your hair and pulls and guides you until you’re pliant for him.
He knocks your hand away from your clit, but before you can complain about it he’s nudging the head of his cock against your entrance and you’re gasping all over again, grinding sloppily as you try to get him inside you. He finally sinks the head in and you allow gravity to aid you in taking the rest of him, moaning brokenly and high pitched at the stretch of him inside you. Bucky groans deep in his chest, hands clutching your waist like a lifeline as you slowly circle your hips, getting used to the feeling.
You stay like that for a few minutes, your breath and Bucky’s mixing hotly between you, and then you finally start fucking yourself on his cock. He grunts when you clench around him on the downstroke. You decide you like the sound, and you really wanna hear it again, so you repeat the action, moaning when the grunt is accompanied by a curse and his fingernails biting into your skin.
It takes what feels like ages for you to realize your thighs and knees ache from riding him, the weed making everything feel like it’s floating, including yourself, but Bucky sees the furrow in your brows and the shaking strain of your legs, and in the next second, he’s got you both moved from the couch to the floor. Time ticks on glacially slow like molasses as you stare up at him whipping his shirt off from where you’re sprawled on the carpet, your limbs shifting lethargically when he spreads your legs to better fit himself between them.
He fucks you hard, but not fast. you’re both much too high for anything fast, yet it still feels like your heart is going to pulse out of your chest, rabbiting away like you’ve run a marathon. Bucky buries his face in your neck, mouthing at your skin while he thrusts almost lazily.
Suddenly, his large hands encapsulate your hips, fingers pressing into the fleshiest parts of them as he sits up, getting his knees under him so he can rest on his haunches. He keeps your ass in his lap and your legs spread on either side of his waist. It makes your back arch and hips tilt up into a position that has you shuddering and sobbing when he begins to grind his thick cock deeper into you.
“I could stay buried in you for hours,” he mutters.
He reaches for the throw pillows on the couch and puts them under your hips, and then he fucks into you so hard it steals the breath right from your lungs, your mouth hanging open on a silent cry. His thrusts are sharper now, angled to perfection and making your toes curl so hard you fear them cramping and body jolt when he glides all the way back in. You gasp when Bucky rips open your shirt (his shirt, your mind helpfully supplies) and sends the buttons scattering across the floor. Those will be a bitch to find and clean up, but that’s a problem for much later.
“Fuck,” he grunts when he sees the piercings glinting in your nipples. “I fucking knew it,” he continues, squeezing each of your breasts in his hands and pinching your nipples between his thumbs and forefingers, making you gasp again, pushing up into the sensation.
“Knew—“ You cut off with a whine when he pinches harder. “Knew what?”
“You walk around here wearing those goddamn cropped tank tops as tight as possible with no bra. Thought I was going crazy when I saw what looked like piercings underneath them,” he confesses as his hands travel back down to grip your waist, never losing his rhythm while he pulls you down to meet his thrusts.
At the sight of your tits bouncing with the movement of his hips, he groans, gravelly, his top lip curling as he grits his teeth and squeezes your hips so hard it hurts, and it only adds to your pleasure. With the way your skin is tingling, your pussy fluttering around him nonstop, you’re not sure if it’s because Bucky is fucking you that well or if it’s the weed. It’s probably both, and you have a split second thought that you’ll just have to test that theory once the high wears off.
It’s almost ironic, you think, how wet and messy your cunt is compared to how dry your mouth feels. It probably doesn’t help that your jaw seems to be permanently slack as you’re unable to stop your gasping inhales, only to exhale sounds you might be embarrassed about if you were clear-headed. Alas, your mind is a lot more focused on the way Bucky is splitting you open and carving a space inside you all for himself.
“So much better,” you whisper absently, fingers clawing at the carpet beneath you.
“Better than what?” he wonders, shifting to grip under your knees and push them up, changing the angle.
You cry out sharply, writhing uselessly in his hold. “My imagination,” you whimper.
Through bleary, tear filled eyes, you glance up at him just in time to see his lips pull into a boyish smirk.
“Mine too,” he confesses and sends you reeling.
You whine and reach down quickly to rub your throbbing clit, your whole body jerking as your pleasure mounts higher and higher. Bucky moans as he watches, stare trained on where you’re joined. His speed does pick up then, the slightest bit, a shudder wracking his frame as you clench down on him, head tipping back and exposing the long expanse of his throat for a brief moment before he suddenly leans over you, letting your legs fall into the cradle of his elbows.
“Won’t you be good for me and cum?” he asks, breathless, hips never letting up.
You open your mouth to reply but all that comes out is a strangled cry of his name, your fingers keeping their pace as your climax swells until it overflows, bursting like a firework and pleasure like you’ve never felt before sparks through every vein, muscle, and bone within you. Bucky curses in such a way it would make a sailor blush as you pulse around him. The sounds of your orgasm and his thrusts meeting your hips are the filthiest things you’ve ever heard, and it doesn’t stop for several moments, dragging on and on. It leaves you trembling and shaking and trying futilely to gather air in your lungs as he refuses to let up.
With great resolve, you bring your wet fingers away from your sensitive clit and up to his panting mouth. He groans at your taste, licking and sucking on your fingers as he chases his own release.
“Please,” you whisper, tears finally escaping your lashes and trailing down the sides of your face, and that seems to be his undoing.
Bucky moans, something high and broken, fucking into you rough enough that you’re worried about carpet burn. But then he pauses, gasping as he finally lets go and rides out his high.
Your hand slips from his mouth and falls to the floor like a deadweight. The only noise in the room now is the both your and Bucky’s harsh breathing and the television still playing that stupid fucking show. Bucky doesn’t move right away, of which you’re very thankful, because you’re not ready to feel the emptiness you know is coming, and it feels nice in a weird way to have him buried in you.
“Fuck,” he exhales, breaking the relative silence.
It makes you giggle, a small thing that turns into something uncontrollable, and when you manage to look at Bucky, he’s grinning in a dopey way that sets you off even more.
This is definitely something the two of you will have to talk about when you’re both sober, but like the buttons, that can be handled later. Although, something tells you it’ll all turn out just fine.
759 notes · View notes
two-white-butterflies · 5 months ago
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★ — imgonnagetyouback | max verstappen
Description: Max ends the relationship with a phone-call.
Pairing: actress!reader/max verstappen
Disclaimer: Everything written in this fanfic holds no truth about anyone's personality or actions. It is made purely for entertainment.
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A/N: everything i do used to be inspired by the 2014 ver. grimes. reader is unhinged as her, but gets development in the end!! THIS IS AN ODE TO THE "MONSTER" TITLED FIC I READ ABOUT LEE PACE.
"Let's break up."
Let's break up.
You could still hear the aftertaste of his voice on your ears. How nonchalant he sounded while denying a relationship of seven years. Why was he quick to leave? Did he find someone else?
You sniffled, wiping your snot with a tissue on your right.
I'm gonna get revenge.
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yourname: me, the dogs and @edmundquandt
liked by 728,391 others
>comments
maxversworldargentina: huh isn't she dating max? did u break up?
reversethismess: Who is he?
victoriaverstappen: ❤️
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Y/N L/N AND FORMULA ONE DRIVER, MAX VERSTAPPEN CONFIRM THEIR BREAKUP.
Yesterday UMG Inc. Agency released a statement to SSN confirming the breakup between Y/N L/N and her Formula One boyfriend.
The pair began to date each other in 2017, where Verstappen was accepted into Toro Rosso and Redbull Racing. They have been together for 7 years and have been dubbed as the most iconic couple in the Formula One paddocks.
Rumors between the two splitting emerged late March, however the couple affirmed that they were still dating each other. On December, however the netizens were greeted with radio silence.
According to L/N's team: the breakup was mutually agreed upon, as they grew apart from all the travelling required for their job.
>comments
grills93: I can't make it go away by making you a villain, I guess it's the price I pay for seven years in heaven.
lnworld: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AND HER NEW INSTA POST WITH EDMUND???? NOOOOOOO
carshfo: she defo cheated with edmund bcs no way lol
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Max's pulse was racing at the sight of you around another man's arms. Seeing your arms wrapped around his shoulders, leaning into him for balance as you laughed at a joke that wasn't funny at all. "- and then we found out that there wasn't a building in the hotel with those rooms." Edmund finished his joke.
By that time, you were already laughing uncontrollably.
Max clenched his jaw.
A piece of his heart regretted breaking up with you.
"Control yourself mate, he's a big investor." Yuri reminds.
Max didn't give a flying fuck. He didn't own any Redbull stocks. He's a good driver, this Edmund Quandt has nothing on him. His features only soften once he remembered the reason why he broke up with you. He wanted to focus more on his career. He wanted to test the pond for more fish.
He needed upgrades on his car.
Fuck.
He needed to chafe his knees for this guy.
"Funnily enough, when I was in Texas I had a similar encounter. I knew exactly what to do." Edmund placed a hand on the small of your back. Max prevents his eyelids from twitching.
Charles smiles, showing the crowd his dimpled cheeks. Charles always had the ability to charm other people. He was perfect, and now he's friends with Mr. Quandt whom he only met.
"I'm sorry for asking this Edmund, but are you two...?" Charles paused, allowing the other man to fill in the blanks. Edmund smiles - pearly white teeth and a godly physique.
Max doesn't fail to observe the glance that Edmund gives you, a look that asked for your permission.
"We're dating each other, for a month now - but we're still testing the waters." you chuckled, ignoring the presence of your ex-boyfriend despite his figure melancholily staring at you.
"I just want to put a ring on her." Edmund admits.
The other people fade into the background.
"My father always says, give her a ring with a big diamond so she won't be able to see how much of a monster you are." he teased.
"You're not a monster." your eyebrows merged into each other.
Max wanted to punch the air.
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yournamepriv: i love this big baby 🥺 @e123456
liked by 92
>comments
haileybeiber: i love this for u omgg
sophierichiegrange: So cute ❤️🥺
e123456: You got my good side! - yournamepriv: Ur good side is 360 degs
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Max takes a deep breath. Again.
You forgot to remove him as a mutual in your private account. And he was greeted by a picture of you kissing Edmund Quandt. His mind raced through a million different thoughts. Regret, anger, resentment - but they were mostly filled of regret.
He didn't appreciate what he got, and now it's gone.
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maxandynfanbase: do you get deja vu? 😭
liked by lewishamilton and 72,192 others
>comments
mercyplease9: EDMUND IS SO TALL??
ohnoaosd9: lewis we can see u 💀
holyhell1: i like pic 2 more
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yourname: visited some mangrove swamps with this big baby. 🥺your integrity makes me seem small... #savethemangroves tagged: edmundquandt
liked by maxverstappen, lewishamilton and 1,283,923 others
taylorswift: You and Edmund have the KINDEST heart. - yourname: thanks taytay i wanna see u and trav here next time - taylorswift: Will do! I'll tell you when my schedule clears up. - yourname: love u ❤️
haileybeiber: We love a momma who cares
sophierichiegrange: <3
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"I can't believe she's out there helping the fucking mangroves." Max places his phone on the couch.
He couldn't believe your sudden change in tune, that drastic of a change to come from someone like you? "She used to complain being in the EU because it meant not using plastic straws." he breathed, still choosing to believe that you were like him.
Still the same crazy. Still the same stupid.
"She's really being fake for him." he shook his head.
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yourname: i totes know how to play 🎾 this friday we're having an event for all the young racecar drivers that unfortunately can't afford to pursue the sport. all proceeds will go to @bmwfoundationsports and the @grandprixtrust !!
liked by edmundquandt and 1,283,912 others
>comments
edmundquandt: ❤️
CharlesLeclerc: Will be in attendance. 🫡
oracleredbullracing: We love a Queen with a good heart
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maxverstappenupdates: Max Verstappen in @bmwfoundationsports and @grandprixtrust.
liked by kellypiquet and 23,392 others
>comments
youalloverme: HE LOOKS SO SAD...
maxismybf: Hadnsumm
posyposie: wondering if a dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life
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He takes another sip of his whiskey, forgetting about the cameras that snapped his figure left and right. There were a million things he wanted to say to you, but he wanted to start with a question.
"I never imagined seeing you change yourself for a guy." he scoffed.
You turned around with your eyebrows raised. Flabbergasted at his insinuation. "Change myself?" you repeated the word, finding it to be hilarious on his tongue.
"The whole save the earth, save the kids thing - you don't care about that. I understand though, money is money and your boyfriend has a lot of that." Max allowed the alcohol to speak in his behalf.
"You don't have the right to talk about me or my integrity. You abandoned me, remember?" you argued, feeling anger pulse through your veins.
Since he left, you tried to make yourself better.
"When I was with you, we were both horrible people. Quite literally the rich people cliche that we promised not to become. I guess you were right, we weren't growing together - and now I've become a better person without you - all because of Edmund." you gritted your teeth, grabbing the champagne on the table before the media realized that the 'ex-lovers' were talking to each other.
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(PRE-EDMUND QUANDT.)
I'm gonna get revenge.
That night you planned to ruin his chance at winning by exposing a flaw in the car that would allow the other drivers to overtake him. A button outside of the car - with the engineers that could remotely turn off a key engine that allowed his car to move faster.
He told you about it because driving at that speed endangers his life, and if you were the only one in the administration panel that knew about it - he made it your duty to push that button.
You grabbed your laptop, sneaking inside the garage. "What are you doing?" a voice emerged from behind you, and you momentarily stopped with the program.
You turned around - only to be greeted with your ex-boyfriend, Edmund Quandt. A man that your parents adored. A man whom everyone thought was going to become your husband, and he was here - behind you. Looking at you.
"Just grabbing my things, I won't be here anymore." you lied. Despite your obvious lie, he chose to give you the benefit of the doubt. He always kinda chose to see the better side of a person, rather than thinking the worst of them first.
"Oh why is that?" he asked with a smile. "Because of things..." you evaded the question - not wanting to rant about your other ex-boyfriend that broke up with you because of a phone call.
"Are you done with grabbing your things?" his eyes narrowed.
"Oh yeah." you breathed.
You had to evade your plan of revenge.
"Do you want to grab some coffee?" he offered.
"Of course."
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Max Verstappen I'm really sorry for doing that. Must be all the Whiskey I drank 😅
Y/N L/N Drunk actions are sober thoughts, Max
Max Verstappen I still shouldn't have confronted you It's just really weird seeing you post things like save the turtles, donate to the kids we never gave a fuck about those 😆
Y/N L/N Yeah, I didn't care about them But now I do We used to be the same but now we aren't
Max Verstappen ?
Y/N L/N You broke up with me because you wanted to focus on your career Because all you care about is money and success We both got stuck on that We didn't see the value in other things When we broke up, Edmund brought me back to earth Opened my eyes to the privilege we've been granted
Y/N L/N Take this as a warning Max The high life isn't gonna last forever
*blocked*
740 notes · View notes
bolithesenate · 8 months ago
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Satine Kryze should not be a sympathetic character.
A complex and tragic one? Sure. Every day of the week.
But she did not 'have a point', neither in-universe, not outside of the sw framework. She isn't a hero, neither of her own story, nor of someone else's. There is no way she wasn't a tool. You should not look at her and think 'this woman has done nothing wrong and what ultimately happened to Mandalore was to no part her fault'.
Because guys. Friends. Strangers on the interwebs.
Pacifism doesn't work.
And it certainly wouldn't have worked in motherfucking Star Wars – the 'wars' is literally in the title – for a system or series of systems who wanted to stay neutral.
YOU DON'T STAY NEUTRAL FOR LONG BY JUST SAYING 'YEAH, NO THANKS <3' TO A LARGE-SCALE CONFLICT.
source: I am Swiss, we've looked at this in history class. Extensively.
Satine was a dreamer (thanks Obi-Wan) who was allowed to keep her delusions because they actively benefitted Palpatine's plans. And that's something you can quote me on. There is literally no other reason (apart from supremely bad writing but we'll leave that aside here) for her and her little friends' 'Alliance of Neutral Systems' or whatever to be allowed to exist.
Not that they were neutral in any way, shape or form, by the way.
So yeah sorry to the Satine stans, but you're idolizing a character that was written exclusively and specifically for Obi-Wan's manpain and who, in-universe, was a supremely bad politician. Because the level of mental dissonace needed to factually be a Republic System, have a seat in the fucking Republic Senate, rely upon their military for aid while actively proclaiming that All Violence Is Bad And Barbaric one sentence later AND THEN CLAIM TO BE NEUTRAL IN THE WHOLE CONFLICT – it's just mind-blowing. Even moreso that people actually look at this character and see something aspirational in her.
Again, I'll gladly dissect her character any day of the week. She is fascinating because of all the implications her existence as a head of state carries with it, as well as her deeply complicated family history and her relation to mandalorian culture.
But it just grates on me personally that that all gets ignored in favor of her being some sort of icon of white american saviorism (bc that's literally what she is) and her objectively bad political takes being treated like they are the only correct stance to be taken during the Clone Wars/Mandalorian Civil Wars.
If you think pacifism works and actually lets you stay neutral, I desperately urge you to open a history book. Because those two are mutually exclusive. Especially in the scenario that Star Wars paints.
555 notes · View notes
aventurineswife · 1 month ago
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Hello ^^ How about i request something about reader being like aven in a way that they have walls too (yes, we're usually sweet to him in the established relationships). But like, i'm curious how it'd be for two people with difficulty admitting their own feelings.
Basically: mutual pining with aven and no one is admitting anything because it'd take a lot to admit it. Not in an enemies way, but just because they both think they don't deserve the other. "i think theyre just being nice to me bc i always hangout with them" kind of oblivious but others would think you're both dating. Until someone like topaz or ratio got fed up with it lol. I'd love to see your take on this.
Thank you! Please do whatever you can with this description, I believe in you ♪
“Don't you want me like I want you, baby? Don't you need me like I need you now?”
Summary: You and Aventurine, despite your deep feelings for one another, have built emotional walls that keep you from confessing. Both of you believe the other is just being nice, too oblivious to realize you're mutually pining. That is, until Topaz and Ratio grow tired of watching the two of you dance around your feelings and step in to smack some sense into you.
Tags: Aventurine x Reader, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Confession in the Rain, Fluff, Emotional Vulnerability, Topaz & Ratio Being Matchmakers, Subtle Romantic Gestures, Light Angst with a Happy Ending.
Warnings: Minor self-doubt and insecurity from both characters
A/N: THIS IS SUCH A CUTE PROMPT!! 😭 AND I CAN TOTALLY SEE THIS!! ESPECIALLY BEFORE AVENTURINE AND YOU WOULD GET INTO A RELATIONSHIP, THIS SUITS SO WELL!! THANK YOU FOR THIS PROMPT AND BELIEVING IN ME!!🤭🫶💖 I HOPE YOU ENJOY!!
(Ifyk the title yk🤭)
Keep sending those requests y'all, I love reading and writing about them 🫶🤭💖
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The click of glasses clinking echoed through the room as a sea of gold and velvet flowed around you. The IPC’s high-profile event had you standing at the corner of the lavish hall, drink in hand, stealing glances at Aventurine across the room. He was his usual self, smiling that easy, carefree grin while chatting up the attendees, his sandy-blond hair perfectly styled, magenta and cyan eyes gleaming.
You sighed softly, feeling the familiar tightness in your chest.
It was so obvious to everyone else—the stolen glances, the shared moments of quiet company, the lingering touches that could be dismissed as nothing. To you, though, it was an enigma. You couldn’t fathom that Aventurine, with his charm and confidence, could actually feel something for you. No, he was just being nice, right? He was always kind to those close to him.
But maybe that’s all you were—a close friend. A confidante.
"Of course, he doesn't feel anything more..." you muttered, running a hand through your hair, as if the action would sweep away the doubt.
Unbeknownst to you, Aventurine was having a similar struggle. Even as he entertained the crowd, his mind was on you. He hadn’t been able to shake that tightening in his chest every time your gazes met across the room. He knew you were kind, gentle even, but surely, you were just being nice because of how often you spent time together. And he? He certainly didn’t deserve you. Not with the walls he kept up.
His fingers played with the roulette-detailing on his sleeve as he watched you from the corner of his eye. ‘How could someone so warm even look my way?’ Aventurine thought. The idea of confessing, of breaking the silence, seemed too daunting—too risky, even for someone like him who played with fate itself.
It was a strange dance, this oblivious pining. And everyone around you was done watching it.
“Are you serious?” Topaz’s voice cut through the polite conversation with the sharpness of a blade. She stood there, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised in an almost imperious arch as she sized you and Aventurine up.
“What are you talking about?” you asked, trying to play dumb.
Topaz narrowed her eyes. “You and Aventurine. Everyone in the IPC knows. Heck, even Numby knows.”
Ratio, standing beside her, shook his head, clearly exasperated. “It’s painful to watch, honestly. You two are practically dating without even realizing it. How much longer are you both going to keep this up?”
A flush crept up your cheeks, and you felt your heart stumble over itself. “W-what? No. We’re not—”
“Oh, please,” Topaz interjected, rolling her eyes. “Don’t even try that excuse. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. It’s like you’re the only one in the room. And don’t even get me started on how you gaze at him when you think no one’s watching.”
You were stunned into silence, and Ratio sighed, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Don’t overthink it. Just… talk to him. He’s probably thinking the same things you are.”
As if on cue, you spotted Aventurine making his way to the exit, slipping away unnoticed by the crowd. The sky outside had turned stormy, and you felt something twist in your chest, urging you to follow.
The rain poured down in a steady rhythm as you caught up to Aventurine, his overcoat already soaked, but he didn’t seem to mind. His back was to you as he stood under the awning, staring out into the storm.
“Hey,” you called out, breathless from both the rush and the nerves building inside you. “Aventurine, wait!”
He turned at the sound of your voice, and for a moment, his expression was unreadable. You felt the words stick in your throat, the intensity of the moment hanging heavy between you.
“What are you doing out here?” he asked, his voice softer than usual.
You swallowed hard, heart hammering as you took a step closer. “I… needed to talk to you.”
His eyes flickered with something—hope, maybe? But also a hint of wariness. “What about?”
Taking a deep breath, you searched for the right words, every inch of you trembling with nerves. “Topaz and Ratio—they think we’re dating. And, well, I… I didn’t know what to say.”
Aventurine stiffened slightly, his gaze dropping to the ground. “Oh...” was all he managed, voice unusually quiet.
You hurried to fill the silence. “They said we’ve been acting like we’re… more than friends, but I didn’t think you’d—”
His gaze snapped back to yours, a flash of emotion crossing his face before he schooled it into that familiar smile. “And what do you think?” he asked, but his voice was a little too casual, too light.
“I think…” you hesitated, your walls creeping back up, fighting the vulnerability of the moment. “I think I’ve been lying to myself.”
That caught his attention, and he straightened, the air between you charged with tension. The rain drummed softly around you, a perfect backdrop to the storm of emotions swirling within.
“I’ve been telling myself you were just being kind to me. Because I was around, or because I was useful, I don’t know. I thought I didn’t deserve you.” you admitted, the weight of the confession making your chest tighten.
Aventurine stared at you, stunned into silence. His smile faltered, and in its place, something softer, more raw, slipped through. “You thought you didn’t deserve me?” he murmured, incredulity coloring his tone. “All this time…”
He chuckled, but there was no humor in it—just a deep, aching understanding. “I’ve been thinking the same thing. That you were just being nice because I was there. That maybe I didn’t deserve someone like you.”
Your heart clenched at the vulnerability in his voice, the real him peeking through.
He took a step closer, his hand reaching out to brush a strand of hair from your face, the rain still falling around you both. “I thought… if I let myself hope for more, I’d lose you.”
You swallowed hard, overwhelmed by the depth of his words. “I’m not going anywhere.” you whispered, voice trembling.
And then, before either of you could second-guess yourselves, you closed the remaining distance, your lips crashing together in a kiss that was both hesitant and fervent. The rain soaked through your clothes, but you didn’t care—the warmth of the kiss, of finally closing that distance, was all that mattered.
When you finally pulled apart, breathless, Aventurine’s smile was different—softer, more real. “Guess we’ve both been fools, haven’t we?”
You laughed, the tension between you finally breaking as the rain continued to fall. “Yeah, I guess we have.”
From a nearby window, Topaz and Ratio watched with satisfied grins.
“Took them long enough.” Topaz muttered, arms crossed, a smirk on her face.
Ratio nodded. “At least now we can stop pretending we didn’t see all those obvious looks.”
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gloomwitchwrites · 9 months ago
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I wish to see how each of the 141 boys respond to their ex, reader, calling them for emotional support bc readers newest bf was toxic af
bonus points if 141 boys are still possessive over reader, but doesn't do anything besides telling reader to leave her toxic bf. OR ORRR he's possessive bc him and reader have been together for so long, who would know how to treat her better than him? He knows every little detail she cares about, every little action that makes her fall head over heels in an instant. Her toxic bf? He doesn't care to learn about those types of things, even if reader outright says it
EVEN MORE BONUS POINTS for smut to show reader what a quick fuck of satisfaction looks like vs genuine sex / love making
Apologies, Anon. This has been sitting in my inbox for…a while, but I’ve been thinking about it off and on since you’ve sent it in.
I’ll drop some HC’s about how this would go down but I absolutely want to explore this further as part of the Imagines & What If Series.
I'll tackle these separately and make them individual one-shots (with much more detail) once I wrap up the By the Belt prompt. But for now...enjoy my HC's (if you will) on what I think would go down in this scenario.
The official masterlist for the extended fics can be found HERE.
ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist
Content & Warnings: suggestive themes (it's vague), brief mentions of protective/possessive behavior, canon-typical swearing
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John Price
Breakup status: Strained (at first), but settled into friendship.
Absolutely hates texting, and you know if you need to reach him immediately, you have to call. Price isn’t an old man, he’s just the old man of the group, and would absolutely be tech literate but also super picky on how he communicates with people personally. It’s Price’s job to be calm, to be a leader, and pick up on things others don’t necessarily notice. So, Price would know you’re upset with your current boyfriend without you even having to spell it out. Besides, Price hates the guy, and knows he’s not worth even a lob of spit.
Plus, Price has been wanting to get back with you for ages. Now that the two of you are friends and have repaired whatever it is that separated the two of you in the first place, Price is looking to find a way to move in again, to slowly (or quickly) win you back, and now he has the opportunity.
Price insists on talking in person, and the moment the two of you are together, he makes the effort he knows you’re needing—because he wants you back, but also because he knows you better than your current boyfriend. Price doesn’t understand why you even gave the guy a chance, but he’ll do everything to get you back.
He would start with subtle indications eventually moving the conversation into past memories, reminiscing on happier times when you were his woman, and how that felt. It slowly devolves until you’re admitting first that you still miss him, and Price goes in for the kill, stating clearly that he still has feelings for you.
The final act is passionate, rough, and intense. Like an atom splitting, it is explosive.
Kyle “Gaz” Garrick
Breakup status: mutual (away all the time; hard to make it work)
When you call, on the verge of tears, needing to talk to someone, Gaz immediately knows something is wrong the moment he picks up. (Sorta like Price but more attuned emotionally to the situation).
I can see Gaz not being a fan of chatting for long periods on the phone, so you don’t even need to ask, Gaz will drop everything and come to you without you having to suggest it. In fact, Gaz picks up, realizes your upset, and immediately says he’s coming over.
When he arrives, it’s like the two of you have never been apart. It’s almost routine, completely natural the way the two of you come together. Gaz is very much about physical affection. He’s constantly touching you, comforting you, and saying sweet things that always make you melt.
Totally knows you need a distraction, and while you’re upset, you’re having a difficult time expressing yourself. When this happens, Gaz just shuts it down, guiding you toward distraction to help you calm down and ease your mind before probing to see if you want to return to the topic.
Once that happens, game over for boyfriend. He’s lost you to Gaz.
The reunification is absolutely passionate and soft. I will die on that hill.
John “Soap” MacTavish
Breakup status: Messy. (You cannot tell me Soap isn’t a hot mess. Our boy is a little too high energy at times.)
While the breakup between the two of you is messy, Soap has always been a “safe” person for you. So, when you call him to vent, you don’t realize that Soap immediately starts heading in your direction until he knocks on your door and the two of you stand there staring at each other, phones held up to your ears. It’s an impulsive decision on his end to come to you, but you don’t turn him away.
Like Simon, Soap would be forward in the way he addresses your concern and the issues—which is your shitty boyfriend who deserves to only be known as your ex. However, where Simon is more of a blunt “these are the facts” kind of communicator, Soap will go for the jugular, using harsher language about this “boyfriend.” He won’t be critical of you, but he will be overly critical of him, listing all the ways this idiot doesn’t deserve you. He might even grow a bit heated in tone and pitch, becoming creative with his slang, and his accent might thicken slightly especially if he’s going off.
But ultimately, Soap is defending you, and reiterates the need for you to stand up for yourself and get rid of this loser.
I don’t think anything passionate would happen in that moment. But I could also see Soap in the middle of him criticizing your toxic boyfriend, you shutting him up with a kiss. Now…that could easily go sideways with someone like Soap. He’s very much impulsive at times, and I think that would win out. Soap would totally kiss you back and not allow you to pull away from him again until you’re…satisfied.
Simon “Ghost” Riley
Breakup status: Tumultuous, eventually mellowing to mutual understanding afterward.
Would listen to you rant without interrupting. He would not ask any clarifying or follow up questions.
When you have it all out of your system, his response is simple: break up with him. Simon is direct—could even say blunt depending on the situation, and he would absolutely be that way in this scenario.
He makes it clear that you’re obviously not happy and that the relationship is making you miserable. He might even lay it out plainly, stating only the facts, sliding into that mindset when he’s in the field, thinking about all scenarios and problem-solving while doing so.
Internally, he’s absolutely ecstatic that your current boyfriend is a garbage heap of a human being. He will see this as an opportunity to slip right back into your life if he plays this right. Sure, the two of you aren’t together anymore, but he’s not over it. Simon is possessive and territorial to the core. Totally still considers you his.
Will absolutely make up a reason to come over, and it will likely fall under the “I’m looking out for you” or “trying to protect you from him” insisting that your boyfriend could escalate and he won’t allow you to potentially be in harm’s way.
When he arrives, Simon immediately turns soft and attentive in just the way you like. He gives you his full attention, doesn’t lecture, and offers plenty of physical touch.
The physical touches turn…well, I’ll save that for the full fic. But it is a reminder of how you’ve always been his and you just need to realize it.
taglist:
@km-ffluv @glitterypirateduck @tiredmetalenthusiast @spicyspicyliving @coffeecaketornado @aykxz98 @kayden666 @36namey @miss-mistinguett @keiva1000 @cherryofdeath @pertinentpostmortem @enfppuff @berarenado @saoirse06 @ninman82 @no-oneelsebutnsu @thewulf @hayleybarnesx @lxblm @ferns-fics @ooldcardigan @beebeechaos @enarien @sw33tsnow @kessi-21 @makayla-666 @lifes-project @burn1ngw00d @heeheehoohoohahahihi @lulurubberduckie @ravenpoe67 @jade1605 @miaraei
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idyllic-ghost · 10 months ago
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title: Forever Yours, Faithfully pairing: lee jihoon x fem!reader genre: romance, fluff, slight angst, smut warnings: mentions of food (sushi) and alcohol, mentions of clothes not fitting (jihoon buys reader something new, but one of the items are uncomfy bc women's sizes are weird), nsfw content (make-out in hot tub, fluffy smut, unprotected sex (don't do this, wrap it up pls), oral (f receiving), slight overstimulation) synopsis: Ever since you had Valentine's day ruined for you by an ex, you decided to never pay the holiday any attention ever again. However, when your new boyfriend finds out about this, he just has to do something for you and change the connotation you have with the fourteenth. wordcount: 9.7k taglist: @enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag
a/n: breaking my hiatus for a moment to post this valentine's fic! this is a @svthub fic swap for @wooahaeproductions! happy valentine's day, i hope you enjoy!🩷 and a special thank you to @wongyuseokie and @strawberryya for proofing this!
see the rest of the posts for the collab here
join my taglist
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“... I hate it. I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh. Even worse when you make me cry…”
A knock at your door interrupted Kat Stratford’s monologue on your TV screen, forcing you to look away from the movie and put down your bowl of ice cream. Pausing the romantic comedy, you listened to see if you were just hearing things - secretly hoping that was the case. However, there was another knock. It sounded cautious rather than angry, so you had no real reason to worry about who was on the other side of your door. You reached for the tissue box to dry your tear-stained cheeks and adjusted your clothes to make you look at least halfway decent. Before you had even stood up from the couch, there was yet another knock at the door.
“I’m coming!” you shouted and stood up. 
You weren’t expecting anyone and silently hoped it was just your neighbor needing something and not one of your friends trying to take you out for drinks. Valentine’s Day was tough for you, it had been for a couple of years now, and you knew that your friends were only trying to cheer you up. However, when you opened the door, you were met with someone that you hadn’t anticipated.
“Hi.” Jihoon stood in front of you, fidgeting with the strap of a bag.
“Hi,” you said, trying to hide your disheveled self behind the door.
“Have you been crying?” He asked with furrowed brows.
“Oh, uh… I was just watching a movie.” You wiped your face with your sleeve. “10 Things I Hate About You… the ending always gets me.”
“Right, I’m sorry I interrupted… I know you said that you didn’t want anything for Valentine’s Day, but…” He sighed and looked down at his feet. “I talked to Soonyoung, and he…”
At the mention of your mutual friend’s name, everything fell into place. He wasn’t a bad friend, not at all, but sometimes he found the most particular ways to get in your business. You knew it came from a good place. However, a warning would be nice.
“He blabbed, didn’t he?”
“Yeah…” He looked back at you. “I know it’s only been a couple of months or so, but I don’t want our first Valentine’s to be… well, this…”
“You’ve got something planned?” You couldn’t hide that you were pleasantly surprised, your joyful tone giving you away.
“It’s a bit last minute, but yes.”
You look into your messy apartment, internally fighting with yourself over whether or not letting him in was worth the embarrassment. When you look back at him, he seems patient - Jihoon always had a way of communicating without having to say a single word, his feelings coming through his expressive eyes or his gentle smile. You didn’t need to worry about making him agitated. He was always patient with you. Moving to the side and opening the door ever so slightly more, you silently invite him in. 
You met Jihoon a few years ago, when you were still with your ex. The two of you never talked much, as a result of Jihoon being so introverted and your ex being a possessive jerk. The time spent with your ex wasn’t all bad, but the good times were drowned out by the bad times - such as your last Valentine’s together. Neither of you planned anything for the day, but you decided to do something last minute: dinner and a movie. When you told him of your plan, he exploded at you.
“I hate Valentine’s, okay!? It’s not my fault you think one day of pampering will fix our problems! Just go out with one of the other guys you’ve been texting- I’ve seen your messages!”
The words rang in your ears every time the holiday came, creeping back each year. Throughout the relationship with your ex, your needs were never met when you were with him. Things were different with Jihoon. Once you had broken up with your ex and a few months had passed for you to heal, Soonyoung introduced you to Jihoon again. It started slow, the two of you stayed friends for a little over a year before even considering dating. Mostly because you were still hurt but also because neither of you seemed to figure out what you both felt for each other. You remember your mutual friends’ reaction when you told them you had started dating; “Finally… we can stop pretending that you don’t make googly eyes at each other whenever you’re in the same room”, or something along those lines.
Now that you had been together for a couple of months, you didn’t understand what took you so long. Even though he was busy most of the time, he always put all of his attention on you whenever the two of you were together. However, when Valentine’s Day rolled around yet again, you didn’t plan anything. You didn’t ask or hint at anything that you wanted to do. You just let it be. That way, your heart stayed safe. Valentine’s wasn’t meant for you, or so you thought. Soonyoung had been with you through it and had been a shoulder for you to cry on from time to time. You swearing him to secrecy about the meaning of the day didn’t work when it came to Jihoon. 
“What’s in the bag?” You asked and tried to take a peek.
“You’ll see.” Jihoon smiled proudly and pulled the bag behind his back, away from you. “Go get some things packed - just enough for one night. I’ll wait here for you.”
“Do I need to get dressed?”
“Whatever makes you comfortable.”
You looked at Jihoon in his usual attire - an oversized t-shirt, big pants, and slippers - and decided you could leave as you were. While throwing a few necessities in a bag, Jihoon stayed in the hallway and watched you. His proud smile never left him, and it made you all the more excited. Just the fact that he wanted to do something with you at all, and pulled himself out of work on his own accord, made you happier than you had ever been on any other Valentine’s. 
Your happy jitters turned into nerves when you saw where Jihoon was driving you. A five-star hotel. Suddenly, the idea of staying comfortable over being dressed up didn’t feel very smart. It was an expensive part of town; people dressed to the nines walked up and down the streets, and you slowly sank further into your seat. As if he could sense your anxiety, Jihoon put a comforting hand on your thigh.
“We’re going in through a back door. Is that okay with you?” It was his way of reassuring you without pointing out your insecurities. “I want it to stay private. Going in through the main entrance could cause a scene.”
You nodded, although you were mostly happy to hear that you didn’t have to walk around in your sweats amongst people with thousand-dollar suits. Usually, you would’ve considered this a negative side effect of dating someone famous - but this time, it was welcomed.
“... why don’t you take a look in the bag now?” he suggested.
“I thought I wasn’t allowed to.”
“Just take a look,” he said, “I think it’ll calm your nerves.”
The bag sat between your legs, so you pulled it up to sit in your lap. Inside the bag was a beautiful green fabric. It felt expensive to the touch. When you pulled it up, you saw that it was a dress - a gorgeous, designer dress. Looking at the bag again, you finally recognize the high fashion brand.
“Jihoon…” You were at a loss for words.
“You’ll have time to freshen up inside, then you can put it on for me.” His eyes stayed on the road, but his ears turned red. “And there’s something else in there too… but you probably don’t want to pull it up in front of the window.”
You rummaged through the bag, seeing something lacy at the bottom of it. Turning to Jihoon with wide eyes, he still didn’t meet your gaze but was smiling. The two of you weren’t necessarily an innocent couple, you were not abstinent, but this was something that he hadn’t done for you before. Any nerves that you had felt before were now replaced with pure excitement. If this was just the beginning, then what else did he have planned?
The two of you made your way up to your suite rather easily. Jihoon got the keycard from the reception and helped carry your bags to the elevator. There weren’t many people around, seeing as you had just missed rush hour, and you ended up getting the elevator all to yourselves. The eleventh button was glowing. You couldn’t remember if you had ever been in a hotel room so high up. While you were lost in your thoughts, Jihoon snuck up right next to you and wrapped his arm around your waist. The bags were on the floor right by your feet, right next to the bag with your dress. The memory of the silky fabric made you smile. He had found something to your taste just for this occasion.
“I’m going to order some food when we get up,” Jihoon said. “But there’s a very nice bathroom with a waterfall shower so, if you want to freshen up before we go out later, I can postpone dinner.”
“We’re eating dinner in the hotel room, but still going out after?” You turned to him with an intrigued look. “What do you have planned?”
“It’s a secret.”
The suite was huge - which, to be fair, is what you should expect from a suite. When you walked in, you were met with the king-sized bed, its headboard against the wall. To the left of it were the windows and balcony, and if it hadn’t been for the cold, you would’ve stepped out on it immediately. To the right of the bed, the floor dipped down one step. There stood what seemed to be a jacuzzi. It was covered with a gray sheet, but the nozzle was still visible. On the other side of the jacuzzi was another small step up and a door - which you assumed was the bathroom.
“Where do you want your things?” Jihoon asked after putting his bag next to the bed.
“I’ll take it to the bathroom,” you hummed. 
Jihoon gave you a small nod and a smile before handing you your bag. You carried your bag across the room to the bathroom. Once the door closed, Jihoon’s smile faded. He hated that he had to figure all of this out through Soonyoung. The history between you and your ex, the meaning of Valentine’s Day for you, and even what you wanted. It felt like he didn’t know you at all, even if you had been friends before you started seeing each other romantically. A big clump of sorrow had grown in his throat ever since he talked to Soonyoung about you earlier that day.
He was in his studio, working like any other day of the week. You had told him that you’d rather not do Valentine’s Day. That it wasn’t your thing, and Jihoon had taken that at face value and respected it. He thought it was what he was supposed to do as your boyfriend. If it weren’t for the city's decorations, he would have completely forgotten the holiday. In fact, he had forgotten that it was the fourteenth already. It was only when Soonyoung burst in with a cute bouquet that he remembered what day it was. 
“Happy Valentine’s Day!” Soonyoung had shouted jokingly as he handed him the bouquet.
There was a small pink note attached to it. It said “Be Mine?” in curvy red letters. Jihoon scoffed at the gifts but still put them somewhere he wouldn’t forget them. The flowers had a small plastic bag with a wet paper towel wrapped around their ends, so they could make it another few hours before he put them in a vase.
“Where did you even find a floral shop right now? It’s only eight in the morning.”
“I have my ways.” Soonyoung shrugged. “What do you have planned for tonight?”
“Nothing,” Jihoon said nonchalantly.
The sudden silence from his usually loud friend made Jihoon push off one of the ear cushions of his headphones and turn to him.
“What?” he asked.
“You’re not doing anything for Valentine’s Day?” Soonyoung was unusually serious.
“Y/N said that she’d rather not do anything,” he answered. “Am I not supposed to respect that?”
“Did you ask her why?”
“I just assumed she didn’t like this kind of stuff. She doesn’t like those cheesy things.” Jihoon tried to brush off the sudden feeling of stress that he had done something wrong, but Soonyoung’s sad face only made him worry more.
“Maybe not, but you didn’t plan anything at all?”
“What?”
Soonyoung sighed, before going to make himself comfortable on Jihoon’s couch. Jihoon followed his friend’s every movement, suddenly feeling like it was hard to breathe. Had he really done something wrong by just respecting your wishes?
“I’m going to assume you don’t know anything,” he said.
“Know what?” Jihoon started getting frustrated.
“Okay, well… do you remember that guy Y/N was with a few years back?”
“You don’t have to remind me…” Jihoon sighed and leaned his head back. “Yes. I know what happened between them and that she hasn’t seen him since.”
“Yeah, but you don’t know about Valentine’s,” Soonyoung explained, “She broke up with him the day after- I don’t know all the details, but they fought about what to do on Valentine’s. She was trying to keep the relationship together, and he just snapped - said he didn’t like the fourteenth and basically made her feel like a burden for trying to patch things together.”
Jihoon put his face in his hands, trying to navigate how to handle this new information. How could he have known? Maybe he should have asked, but he didn’t want to intrude on her privacy… Everybody told him that communication is key, but nobody warned him that it would be this difficult.
“Y/N loves Valentine’s Day, as long as it’s not some cheesy thing- she didn’t lie to you about that,” Soonyoung said, “She’s just scared that if she put pressure on you about it, you’d blow up on her.”
“Why would she think that?”
“Because everyone’s not always rational.” Soonyoung stood back up and walked over to him. “Like you right now, you’re probably worrying about her not feeling safe around you. She does. She just has her problems to deal with. Instead of worrying, you should do something.”
“What? Like dinner and a movie?”
“No-” Soonyoung cleared his throat. “No. That’s what she wanted to do with her ex. Find something else.”
“What do people do on Valentine’s?” Jihoon’s eyebrows furrowed as he tried to find the answer to his question in some corner of his mind. 
“Wine tasting.”
“Wine tasting?”
“She’s always wanted to go, and I know a place- and the owner…” He paused and quickly added, “Well… Mingyu knows the owner, but you get my point.”
“And you think Y/N wants that?”
“Definitely. Go find Mingyu and ask him to help you out.”
“I will, thank you.” Jihoon stood up and walked over to the door but turned to face his friend again. “When did you start acting wise?”
“I’m a man of many mysteries.” Soonyoung joked. “You can thank me by letting me borrow your studio.”
“... fine.”
“Yes!” He quickly got up his phone and started tapping. “If you see me go live, no, you don’t.”
Not even wanting to think about what that meant, Jihoon left the studio with a huff.
The sound of the water turning on in the shower brought Jihoon out of his thoughts. You seemed happy, albeit nervous, so he shouldn’t have anything to worry about… but he couldn’t help worrying about you and your feelings. He would do anything to make you forget about your past connotations with today. Jihoon got out his phone and looked at his messages. “Do you know that Soonyoung’s in your studio right now?” sent in different variations from many different people… he would have to worry about this later. Tonight was supposed to be all about you, so he turned off his phone and put it back in his pocket.
You were blissfully unaware of Jihoon’s troubles as you stood in the stream of the waterfall shower. The warm water created a comforting barrier around your body. The steam from it created a mist that seemed to silence all sounds except the water hitting the floor.  You could close your eyes and forget everything around you for a moment. Letting the water run over your head yet another time before turning the nozzle off, you let yourself have a moment of pure silence. Without the water running down your body, the cold air started tickling your skin. You reached outside the shower and grabbed your towel, drying yourself off before wrapping it around you. 
The bathroom of the suite was as luxurious as the rest of it. There was a window, currently fogged up from the steam, facing another part of the city than the windows in the bedroom. The toilet seemed to have different settings, given the many buttons you didn’t dare touch, and the sink had a wide marble top. In a box on the sink, there were a plethora of travel-sized sample products - and you looked through their assortment before doing your skincare. You could hear Jihoon talking on the other side of the door, probably ordering the two of you room service, but his voice was too muffled for you to hear what he was saying. You wondered just how much Soonyoung had told Jihoon for him to act this way. Jihoon wasn’t neglectful. However, he didn’t always know how to express how he felt through acts of service or coming up with cute dates. The two of you spent most of your time together the way you had when you were just friends, with some changes of course. Your most precious memories with Jihoon were from the simple times; watching movies together, going out to get coffee, or laying in bed together during the morning when neither of you could get up. He knew he didn’t have to do something like this, you had told him yourself, but he decided to do it anyway. You smiled to yourself as you put on the fluffy hotel bathrobe. 
When you got out of the bathroom, you looked to your left to see an entire area of the room that you seemed to have missed. Your want for a luxurious shower was bigger than your want to explore the room, it seemed. The unknown area of the hotel room had a couch with a TV in front of it and a lonely armchair standing in the corner. There was a small bar with a minifridge, and on the coffee table stood a pink, heart-shaped box and a bouquet of red roses in a vase. Beside the coffee table stood a very flustered Jihoon, looking puzzled at the sight of the box and flowers.
“Are those for us?” You asked, making Jihoon look at you.
He paused for a moment at the sight, forgetting the box of chocolates on the table, his jaw first going slack before he started smiling. Clearing his throat, he looked back at the coffee table and picked up a note to show you.
“It looks that way,” he said.
You took the note from him; “Enjoy the evening! Happy Valentine’s Day, from the staff of Prestige View,” it said in bold golden letters. You turned it around in your hand, but there was nothing else on the back. 
“I told them it was a Valentine’s getaway. I didn’t think they’d do something like this so last minute,” Jihoon said and took another look at you. “Did you enjoy the shower?”
“It was the most wonderful shower I’ve had in a while.” You put down the card and approached him with your arms open. “Thank you for doing this. It’s very sweet.”
“You don’t have to thank me… I wanted to do this,” he assured you as he wrapped his arms around you. 
Jihoon nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck, and you could feel his cool breaths against your warm skin. You squeezed him tighter as he whispered how beautiful you looked. It was barely audible, and you silently acknowledged it by pressing a kiss to the side of his head. He pulled away from you with a small smile, his eyes sparkling with adoration. Your moment was ruined by a knock at your door and a voice shouting, “Room service!”. 
“I’ll get that; make yourself comfortable.” Jihoon left your side.
You sat down on the plush cushions of the couch, practically sinking into the fabric - almost like floating on a cloud. Just as you put a blanket over your legs, Jihoon comes back with a big tray. You let out a delighted gasp as he put it down on the coffee table. 
“You still like sushi, right?” Jihoon joked as he went to grab two bottles of water from the mini-fridge.
“Yes.” You looked over the large tray and the many different kinds of sushi bites.
Quickly, you patted the space beside you for him to sit down. Jihoon put the bottles on the table and sat down. You captured his face with your hands and brought your lips to his cheek for a thank-you kiss. The sudden act of affection had the man beside you stumped - barely moving while you reached for the tray with your chopsticks.
“You’re being ridiculous,” he chortled with a reddened face.
“No, am not- dish ish amashing,” you said with your hand over your mouth to hide the piece of sushi you were still chewing.
You looked over at Jihoon, who had still not touched the food. He was still stuck looking at you as if he was trying to memorize every detail of how you looked at this moment. With one hand, he reached over to your head and ruffled your hair despite your grunts of protest coming from you.
“Eat well,” he said and started eating himself.
Once the food was finished, at least as much as you could muster, and after a food coma nap on the couch, the two of you started getting ready for the mysterious evening. Whatever he had planned, Jihoon wasn’t telling you. All you knew was that he wanted you to wear the dress he had gotten you, so while Jihoon was in the shower, you picked up the bag and looked at the garments inside. It was a silky dress and lingerie with a matching color. The thought of your boyfriend knowing exactly what you were wearing under your dress throughout the rest of the evening felt exciting in some strange way.
Your fingers grazed the green fabric of the dress - you were almost too afraid to put it on. It looked expensive. A part of you wondered how he had gotten it so fast. Had he gotten someone else to get it for him? Had he gone into stores himself? Picturing it in your head almost made you start laughing. You could see him furrowing his brows at the sizes and different shapes. Mustering up the courage to put it on, you sadly find out that the underwear doesn’t fit very comfortably. And although you want to wear it for him, it would just not work. So you put on the undergarments that you had brought with you - which were not as luxurious as the ones he had bought, but they were still pretty. You had packed it at the last minute, just in case you needed it.  More importantly, the dress fit you perfectly to the point that you questioned how he could pick it out.
When Jihoon got out of the bathroom, he was already dressed. His hair was still slightly damp, it was slicked back to the best of his abilities, but a few strands of hair still fell over his face. His all-black suit made you think of one of those dramas where the main female character gets together with a demon. 
“You look beautiful,” he said, but his eyes drifted over to the bed where the lingerie he bought was still lying. “Are you…”
“It didn’t fit,” you answered quickly. “I put on something that I brought. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course, it’s okay.” He walked over to the bed to return the garments  in their bag. “I’ll just get you a better size next time.”
“Next time?” You raised your eyebrows in surprise.
“Sure, why not?” He put the bag down on the floor and turned back to you. “I liked getting you these…”
“Well, I won’t stop you.” You walked up next to him and held onto his arm. “You look very handsome, by the way.”
Jihoon put his hand on top of yours, still holding onto his forearm, and gently squeezed it as a silent thank you. A soft squeeze of your hand was his usual way of communicating things to you that he didn’t know how to express verbally. The casual compliment proved too much for him; he avoided eye contact, and you could see his ears turning red. You would never think that this man could get so flustered the first time you talked to him. He was quiet then too, but he was calm and collected. Maybe it was a front, and maybe he was good at hiding these things from strangers - either way, you were happy that he felt a little more comfortable now.
The two of you made your way to the hotel restaurant, and you were looking for something that could tell you what you were in for. Dark hallways and furniture, lit up by elegant chandeliers in the ceiling and sleek lights on the walls, made the hotel seem endless. You and Jihoon walked in comfortable silence, mostly because you were trying to focus on finding signs. There were other people around you dressed in visibly expensive clothes, so you knew that it wasn’t a private event. However, you had no idea what kind of thing Jihoon could come up with. 
At the entrance to the restaurant, you were greeted by a tall man with a slim mustache. He was dressed in the colors of the hotel and had a small name tag. You neither had the time nor energy to read what it said, as it was written in complicated cursive, and the man quickly opened the door for you after Jihoon said his name. In the restaurant, there were round tables placed in a half-circle. By each table stood two chairs, and the man by the door brought you to one by a large floor-to-ceiling window. Out the window, you could see the entire city. It wasn’t very late, so most of the windows in the buildings surrounding you were lit. The man pulled the chair out for you, and you sat down.
“Thank you,” you said, and the man walked away.
A tall candle, a small plate and knife, and a myriad of wine glasses were on the table. In front of you was a small card, and on the front of it said “Menu” in the same kind of cursive as on the man’s ineffective name tag.
“Are we eating more?” you asked with a worried glance at Jihoon.
“Open it,” he answered simply.
You opened the card and read a list of French and Italian names, most of which you couldn’t pronounce. 
“Wine?” You looked back up at Jihoon with big eyes. “Is this a wine-tasting event?”
“Do you like it?”
“Are you kidding? I love it,” you said with a big smile. “Thank you, honey.”
Jihoon didn’t have time to respond as another man, dressed similarly to the man by the door, stood in the middle of the half-circle and began speaking. The murmur of the people in the room died down as everyone turned their attention to the man.
“Welcome to our Valentine’s wine-tasting event,” he said with a clear and loud voice, “I will be presenting the wines for you all tonight, along with the assortment of refreshments that go along with them. To start the night, our servers are currently providing you with an extra dry Prosecco.”
A server approached your table and poured the sparkling wine into your glasses as if on cue. The murmur started up again as everyone began talking about the wine. You thanked the waiter, and he walked away. 
“This 2022 sparkling wine, made of the Glera grape, has hints of apple and honey,” the wine presenter said. “This is produced in the province of Trieste, Italy…”
The man kept talking, but you started to tune him out when he started saying words you didn’t recognize. You carefully sniffed the wine before taking a sip of it.
“Good?” Jihoon asked.
“Very good.” You put your glass down and opened the booklet of wines. “I don’t know how much I should drink of it… how many glasses are on the menu?”
“Six,” he answered. “Including the Prosecco.”
You looked at the list; Pinot Grigio, Chardonnay, Merlot, Nebbiolo, and Vin Santo… yeah, you’d be drunk by the end. The glasses weren’t extremely big, and they certainly didn’t fill the glass all the way, but there was no way you’d walk out of here just barely tipsy if you drank everything. 
“Drink as much as you want, okay?” Jihoon brought you out of your spiraling thoughts. “I’ll take care of you- even if I have to carry you out of here.”
You chuckled at his joke and comfortably brought the glass of Prosecco to your lips again. Jihoon was still looking at you when you put your glass down. He had a certain look in his eye that you had only really seen a couple of times before. Mischief mixed with something sentimental - playful and romantic.
“What?” You asked.
“All of this…” He motioned to your surroundings. “It suits you… it’s sexy.”
“Sexy?” You raised your brows as you raised your glass to your lips again. “Good to know.”
Jihoon looked away from you, one of his hands coming up to hide his reddened face. He let out a huff and straightened his back.
“I just mean that-”
“No, I heard you,” you teased.
Before Jihoon could get another word in, the servers came out with the next wine; Pinot Grigio, paired with small crackers with goat cheese and apricot jam. The presenter began speaking about the wine again, but your head was already buzzing, and you were far too distracted to listen to him. One of your feet was running up the inside of Jihoon’s calf. Your hand was resting on the table between you, and Jihoon quickly put his hand on top of yours. 
“What are you up to?” He asked with a strained smile.
“Hm?”
“What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” You picked up the second glass of wine as you brought your foot up higher.
You brought the wine to your lips, letting out a delighted hum before putting the glass down again. Jihoon squeezed your hand as your foot was now brushing against the inside of his thigh. Instead of backing down, you let go of Jihoon’s hand and picked up one of the crackers. A little bit of jam got on your finger as you put the appetizer in your mouth. You locked eyes with him as you put the tip of your finger in your mouth.
“You’re insatiable,” he said.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You shrugged and grabbed your drink again.
Jihoon shook his head slowly, picking up his glass. However, just as he started to enjoy teasing, you brought your foot back down. He gave you a confused look, trying to figure out your motive.
“Did you like the wine?” You asked, ignoring the tension growing between you.
After each glass, the soft buzzing feeling in your head grew more prominent. You got giggly and touchy - you couldn’t seem to let go of Jihoon’s hand across the table. The restaurant offered you bread and other refreshments along with your drinks and played romantic ballads over the speakers. It wasn’t like anything you had done with Jihoon before, but it was just perfect for tonight. Your teasing under the table had stopped, although you sometimes nudged your foot next to his, but the tension it had left between you didn’t break. At this point, you weren’t listening to the wine presenter nor taking his advice on how you should drink the wine. Maybe some of the wine-tasting experience was gone because of it, but you were more than content with the night still. When they brought out the Vin Santo, they also came out with a dessert; a tiramisu shaped into a heart and two spoons. Jihoon quickly picked up one of the spoons and let it sink into the dessert. The spoon dipped into the creamy dessert, ruining the layer of cacao powder laying on top. Picking the spoon back up with a perfectly bite-sized piece on it, he held it up to your mouth. 
“Are you feeding me?” You asked with a giggle.
“I want you to have the first bite.” He smiled and urged the spoon toward you again.
You opened your mouth and as you closed it around the spoon, you were hit with an explosion of flavor - the strong espresso, the bitter cacao, and the sweet lady-fingers and cream. The two of you laughed, for no real reason, as Jihoon pulled back the spoon. 
“This has been so nice,” you said and motioned to the last glass on the table. “But I won’t be able to finish this drink…”
“That’s alright,” he hummed. “Do you want to… go back to our room?”
“Yes, please.”
After, not so carefully, sneaking out of the restaurant while the wine presenter was talking, you walked through the long hallways towards your room. Jihoon's hand was at first only placed on your lower back, but eventually snuck around your waist to keep the both of you upright. The two of you had been drinking a lot, but the long walk helped sober you up just a little. You'd definitely get a headache in the morning, but it wasn't something you couldn't handle. As the two of you finally got to your hallway, you were ready to throw yourself in bed - but Jihoon apparently had other plans.
“I still have another surprise for you, you know.” He held your waist firmer, keeping you close to his side. “They should’ve set it up for us in the room by now.”
You excitedly giggled as you watched Jihoon fumble with the keycard before unlocking the door. As soon as he opened it, the smell of roses hit your nose. By your feet laid a trail of red rose petals, which was leading you into the room. You followed the trail with careful steps and looked up as they came to a stop. The jacuzzi was now turned on and bubbling. In the water, even more rose petals were floating. Jihoon came up behind you and wrapped his strong arms around your waist.
“Is it okay?” He whispered next to your ear.
“It’s perfect,” you answered softly and with a warm smile. “If this is last minute, I can’t even imagine what you could do with time on your hands.”
“You could find out,” he suggested and pressed a kiss to the area where your neck meets your shoulder.
Jihoon’s words, although softly spoken and barely over a whisper, sent a shiver down your spine. His hands played with the fabric of your dress, and you leaned back against his chest to fully welcome his embrace. The soft kisses he was placing on your shoulder and neck didn’t stop, and you leaned your head to the side to allow him more access.
“I’d love to keep this going,” you whispered. “But I don’t want to waste all this.”
Your boyfriend sighed and let you go, the absence of his arms leaving a chilly imprint around your waist. You went to take off your shoes. After putting your feet on the floor, you looked up to see Jihoon taking out his button-up from his pants to unbutton it. You watched in anticipation as he shrugged off the shirt, watching the muscles in his back move as he did. He threw his shirt on a chair before unbuckling his belt, all while being unaware of you ogling at him. When his pants had been unbuttoned, he finally looked back at you - at your fully dressed form.
“Are you going to make me get in alone?” He asked.
“I…” You paused to find an excuse. “Well, since I didn't have time to get you a Valentine's Day present, I thought you could unwrap me instead.”
"Ah, so that's the only reason you were just standing there looking at me?" Jihoon teased.
"Definitely." You nodded, content with your answer.
Jihoon motioned for you to come over to him, which you quickly did. You had no trouble unzipping yourself from this dress but getting a little help never hurt. His hands made work of your zipper, slowly dragging it down your back. The soft touch of his fingers tracing the edges of your lingerie had your head buzzing more than the amount of wine you had been drinking. 
“Thank you,” you murmured and let the straps slide off your shoulders.
It always felt a little nerve-wracking to get undressed in front of him - being vulnerable with him like this was still somewhat new to you. Nevertheless, the feeling of him embracing you again comforted you. 
“You look beautiful,” he said. "I thought it'd be fun to buy lingerie for you, but letting it be a surprise might be better..."
You got out of his grip and turned to him, putting a hand on his chest to prevent him from wrapping his arms around you again. Jihoon was grinning like a love-sick fool - an expression that you hadn’t seen much of before, but that you could definitely get used to.
“Stop fooling around,” you said. “We haven’t even gotten in the hot tub yet…”
"Then let me finish unwrapping my present," he argued with a flirtatious tone.
You let your hand fall to your side, allowing Jihoon to approach you again. His hands went behind your back, playing with the edge of your lingerie again before unhooking the bra. He took his hands back from behind you and gently, almost innocently, pulled the straps of your bra down. The garment fell to the floor with a soft thud. Jihoon brushed your hair to the side, pressing a few kisses on your neck before trailing them down your clavicle; down between the valley of your breast, over your stomach. When he was down on his knees, he looked back up you - silently asking for permission as he played with the hem of your panties. You nodded, and Jihoon pressed a kiss to your hipbone before pulling them down.
After getting fully undressed, and after Jihoon grabbed the box of chocolates and two bottles of water, you sat down in the jacuzzi. With one hand, he opened up the box and put the lid on the floor. He picked up a random piece and put it in his mouth, making a weird grimace.
“Not good?” You asked.
“No.” He shook his head. “Could you hand me the water?”
You picked up one of the bottles for him, unscrewing the top and handing it to him before you grabbed the second bottle for yourself. Drinking the cold water contrasted nicely with the hot bath. While it didn’t help you to sober up completely, it helped you clear your head a little.
“Sad to let them go to waste…” you said as you put the cap back on your bottle, and he hummed in agreement. 
“I’ll take them with me, maybe someone else likes them.” He put down the water bottle and offered to put yours down as well, which you gladly accepted.
Jihoon let out a sigh and leaned his head back, while you moved over to sit beside him. One of your hands caressed his chest and landed on his shoulder, while your head rested on his other shoulder. Jihoon wrapped one of his arms around your frame, trying to pull you impossibly close.
“Tonight was perfect,” you confessed.
“You’re talking like the night’s over.” He turned his head to look at you.
“It’s not over?”
“It doesn’t have to be.” Jihoon cupped your face in his palm, bringing your face closer to his. 
The two of you looked into each others’ eyes before he suddenly broke out into an embarrassed fit of giggles. His forehead leaned against yours.
“Sorry… that was cheesy, wasn’t it?” His thumb was caressing your cheekbone, slowly going back and forth over the soft skin.
“It was sweet,” you assured him. “But a little bit cheesy, yes.”
He let out another short laugh and turned away from you, suddenly very shy. Your hand left his shoulder to turn his face back to you. The way that he looked at you drowned out all sound, even the sound of the hot tub jets, and for a moment you let yourself be engulfed by bliss. It wasn’t how you had imagined spending Valentine’s Day - it was better than you could have imagined. You wrapped your arms around Jihoon’s neck and brought him closer for a kiss. At first, it was gentle, practically just a peck, but then you grew hungry. In a sudden need for more, you pressed your lips against his again. Your lips danced for dominance, all the while Jihoon gripped your hips to maneuver you to straddle his lap. Everything was spinning, you found yourself completely lost in his kiss - only for Jihoon to break it, the feeling of him smiling against your lips making you smile as well.
“What?” you asked, out of breath.
“Nothing,” he said. “Just you.”
You rolled your eyes at his comment, but couldn’t help your smile growing wider. Jihoon pressed another kiss to the corner of your lips, then on your jaw, down your neck, and on your clavicle. Exploring every inch of you that he could reach, Jihoon pulled you in closer. The action made you come closer to his already hardened cock. Testing out the waters, you started slowly grinding against him. Between lingering kisses against your skin, Jihoon let out soft groans and whimpers - it wasn’t even in his head to tell you to stop. Your fingers raked through his hair, silently urging him to keep going.
“Jihoon.” You let out a shaky breath. “Baby…”
“What?” He pulled away and looked up at you, pupils blown out to double their normal size and hair messy by your doing. “Is something wrong?”
“Yes,” you whimpered. “I need you.”
“In here?” He looked amused at your sudden desire. “Right now?”
“I don’t care-”
In a split second, Jihoon manhandled you to sit with your back against his chest. Water splashed around the tub, possibly spilling off the edge as laughter spilled from your lips. One of Jihoon’s arms was wrapped around your waist, while his other hand was spreading your thighs apart. His lips were back on your neck again - his kisses and his fingers drawing patterns on the inside of your thigh were making you dizzy.
“Is this okay?” He asked.
“Yes.”
At this point, you were aching - the simple touch of his hand where you needed him most had you falling apart. While his middle- and ring finger circled your clit, his other hand ran across your body. Jihoon was everywhere, there was no way you could escape him - so you let yourself be engulfed by all of him, slowly sinking into your body. Your mouth hung open, and your moans and whines were impossible to hide. His hot breath fanned against your neck, teeth grazing against the delicate skin before his soothing tongue made contact with it. His other hand reached your chest, fingers circling your nipple. Suddenly, in desperate need to ground yourself, you grabbed his hand. Your breath hitched in your throat as his fingers plunged inside you, his palm still grazing against your clit. The grip you had on his hand tightened, and you could feel him smiling against your neck. Jihoon’s hand moved expertly as if he already knew every crevice of your body - and where his touch would drive you mad. Your hips stuttered against his hand.
“There you go,” he murmured in your ear. “Fall apart on my fingers, baby, you can let go.”
The feeling of him lightly biting down on your earlobe, and the persistent thrusting of his fingers, made something snap in your lower stomach. A wave of pleasure washed over you, your body moving on its own against his hand. You could hear water splashing on the floor, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care about it at that moment. Jihoon left his hand in between your legs, letting you ride out your high against it. His other hand lovingly held onto yours still, not even planning on letting go unless you did so first.
“Are you alright, darling?” His velvety voice brought you back to the real world.
As soon as you tried to move, Jihoon helped you to move your legs to sit across his lap. Leaning your head against his shoulder, you finally found your voice.
“I’m more than alright,” you answered.
One of Jihoon’s hands rested on your back, while the other held your legs. In his arms, you were safe - you had a feeling you always would be. You snuggled your face into the crook of his neck and closed your eyes. However, the feeling of something hard pressing against your thigh had your mind drift off to other things.
“Jihoon?”
He hummed in response.
“Could you help me get to bed?”
“Tired already?”
“Not a chance.”
The two of you managed to get out of the hot tub and dry off quickly - not caring about being completely dry before moving over to the bed. Plush pillows and covers welcomed you as you practically jump into them. You held out your arms to Jihoon, and he quickly came to your embrace. Leaning over you, his hair fell in front of his face - but he didn’t seem to mind. Instead of brushing it to the side, he leaned down and placed a kiss on your lips. Clearly, he had a more important objective, and so it was up to you to brush his hair away from his face. You held it back, intertwining your fingers in his locks, and he let out a delighted sigh as your nails gently scratched against his scalp.
“Let me take care of you too,” you suggested as you broke the kiss.
For a moment, Jihoon considered it. He couldn’t deny that he loved having your lips wrapped around his cock, or even just your hand, but he couldn’t forget why he was here in the first place. 
“Tonight’s about you,” he reminded you. “Just relax and let me take care of the rest.”
You couldn’t exactly say no to that kind of proposition. One of Jihoon’s hands traveled down your body again, separating your legs for a second time tonight. You wrapped your legs around his hips, pulling him closer. The soft and slow was nice, but now you were getting antsy. A smile flashed across Jihoon’s face, which he tried to hide by biting down on his bottom lip. Showing him your unabashed want for him was something he’d never get used to. As he lined himself up with your core, you moved your hands to grip onto his shoulders. The stretch of him entering still managed to feel like the first time you had been with him like this. As he bottomed out, you let out a guttural moan - still sensitive from your earlier orgasm.
“Fuck, you feel amazing…” Jihoon rested his head in the crook of your neck.
Having struggled through the entire night, trying not to take you on the couch earlier or even on top of the restaurant table, this alone was almost too much. The sting from your nails digging into his back cleared up his fogged-up head slightly, and he started moving. Jihoon’s movements were slow, agonizingly so, but if he moved any faster he was afraid he might cum on the spot. This entire night had been a tease for him, and now that he finally got what he wanted he didn’t know how to act. Jihoon lifted his head and looked at your face. Your eyebrows were furrowed, your eyes shut tight, and your bottom lip slipped between your teeth. Brushing his thumb against your cheek, and cupping your face in his palm, your eyes fluttered open to look at him.
“Please, Jihoon,” you whimpered. “Just a little faster?”
How could he say no to you? His hips picked up their pace, while his head was back in the crook of your neck. You let out a surprised moan as his teeth dug into your skin, as he tried to contain himself. How could you look more beautiful every time he laid his eyes upon you? Jihoon swore that you’d kill him someday if it continued like this. He leaned back up on his arm. The hand that wasn’t holding him up went to grab your thigh, pulling one of your legs up to rest on his shoulder. A string of swears flooded out of his mouth, and he switched positions so that he was sitting up. Your hips were pulled up on his thighs, your back arched up from the bed, and your jaw went slack as Jihoon’s hips pistoned into you - hitting a spot inside you each time that made you see stars. Your hands went to grab something, anything and landed on the sheets. The white fluffy sheets creased under the pressure of your grip. You couldn’t hold it in anymore - between managing to hit your g-spot with each thrust and your previous orgasm, you were getting all too close to the edge.
“Oh- shit,” you moaned. “I’m gonna cum-”
“Cum for me, baby,” he groaned in response.
Your body twitched as you let go, cumming a second time this night. Jihoon, filled with a sudden determination, didn’t stop. He switched positions to lean over you again. The more intimate position allowed you to grab onto him again. Even when you had come down from your orgasm, he didn’t stop - and you weren’t about to tell him to to do so.
“Give me another one,” he practically begged.
“I can’t-”
“Yes you can, darling,” he growled. “Just let go of everything, just focus on me.”
Your legs were around his hips again, and your arms wrapped around his neck. Jihoon leaned his forehead against yours, his eyes staring into your soul. One of his hands slipped between your bodies, messily rubbing your swollen clit. You felt like you were about to explode, spasming at his movements.
“Fuck- I love you,” he groaned, “Cum for me again, darling- cum with me…”
At his command, your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you came for a third time. Jihoon followed shortly after, pulling out to cum on your stomach. He threw his head back as he pumped his cock with his fist. Your limbs were unmovable, falling to the bed with a thump. His words rang in your ears. “I love you”. Was it a slip-up? Something that just happened in the heat of the moment? Or did he mean it? You didn’t have much time to think about it. Jihoon placed a kiss on your forehead, mumbling something about getting you cleaned up, before he got off the bed and went over to the bathroom. 
Jihoon came back with the forgotten water bottles from before and a warm, wet towel - cleaning you up with a gentle touch, making sure that he wasn’t too rough with your aching body. When he was done, helped you under the covers before he got in himself. The water bottles were standing on the bedside table, waiting for you tomorrow morning when you’d need them most. You lay on your side, and Jihoon curled up next to you - his arms wrapped around your frame. The words he had spoken never left your thoughts. Jihoon, unaware of your spiraling thoughts, cuddled closer to you, but your stiff body caught him off guard.
“Are you okay? You’re not hurt, are you?” He asked quickly.
“No- no… I’m fine,” you said. “It’s just… did you mean that?”
“What did I say?” Jihoon’s eyes widened.
“When you-… before-… you said ‘I love you’,” you mumbled.
With his body lying so close to you, you could hear his breath hitch. A moment of silence passed between the two of you. Jihoon’s fingers were nervously drumming against your back, you could almost hear the gears in his brain turning to think of something to say. He stirred around the bed, moving to look at you. There was no regret in his eyes, only worry.
“I’m sorry-”
“I love you too.”
Jihoon let out a short breath, which turned into a relieved laugh. The sound of his laugh made you relax, melting into his embrace again. You were struck with a sudden wave of embarrassment, hiding your face in his chest. He put his chin on the top of your head, wrapping his arms tighter around you.
“I didn’t mean to let it slip out like that,” he murmured. “I mean- I was planning on telling you, just not… like that.”
“I know,” you said and adjusted yourself to look back at him again. 
Jihoon’s body relaxed under your hands, his muscles releasing any sign of tension. There was a little voice in your head, anxiously asking “What now?”, but you decided to ignore it for now. At this point, you had no reason to worry. You had an entire future ahead of you, and you got to spend it with the man lying next to you. It was more than you could ask for. Suddenly, Jihoon got a weird look on his face - as if he had just remembered something important that he had forgotten to do. 
“Shit… did I forget to ask you to be my Valentine?” he asked.
You thought back to the day, trying to remember if he had ever carried out the silly tradition, and couldn’t recall that he had asked you.
“I think so,” you hummed. “You have to hurry, the day’s almost over.”
There wasn’t a clock nearby that you could check, it might have already been the fifteenth, but you couldn’t find it in you to care. Jihoon cleared his throat ceremoniously and tried his best not to burst out laughing again.
“Will you be my Valentine, Y/N?”
“I’ll always be your Valentine, Jihoon,” you answered.
Quiet laughs echoed through the big room, as the two of you lay in bed talking until you fell asleep.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ . ⁺   ✦ B O N U S ✦ ⁺ ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ . ⁺  
"Sooo?"
Jihoon hadn't even noticed that Soonyoung had approached him, or that he was even in the building, and jumped a little as the man came up beside him.
"So what?" Jihoon kept walking towards the elevator.
"How was the date?"
"Good."
"Just good?"
"Yeah."
The two of them stood in silence, both of them waiting for the elevator to reach their floor. Jihoon adjusted his sunglasses and hoodie, trying to not avoid the bright lights as much as possible. He had wanted to stay at the hotel with you, to spend a quiet morning in bed together was all he wanted. However, when he's suddenly called into an important meeting he can't just ignore it - no matter how much he wanted to. Jihoon let out a quiet sigh. You were probably still in bed right now. He had paid the hotel to make sure you could take as long as you wanted to get up, all you had to do was leave the keycard in the reception before you left. As Soonyoung started whistling, Jihoon seriously started to regret not giving into your pleading to stay in bed with you. He'd kill to get to still be under those covers - he'd even let you press your cold feet against his warm body if it meant that Soonyoung would just stop whistling.
"Would you stop that?" He hissed.
"Damn... you woke up on the wrong side of the bed." Soonyoung huffed. "Poor Y/N... she probably can't even walk, right?"
"What?"
"Because of the hangover," he explained. "If you're like this, I can only imagine what it's like for her. How much did you drink last night?"
Jihoon stayed quiet.
"Wait, what did you think I meant?" Soonyoung asked with a knowing smile.
"Shut up," Jihoon groaned.
"I'm just joking, come on!" He poked Jihoon's arm. "Did you bring me back a souvenir?"
Jihoon, struck with a sudden wave of evil genius, reached into his bag and took out the weird-tasting chocolates. He handed them to Soonyoung, who giddily accepted them.
"Chocolates? For me? Gosh, you're such a romantic!"
Finally, the doors to the elevator opened with a pleasant ding. The two idols walked in, still completely silent. Seokmin came running down the hall, holding his hand out and shouting at them to hold the elevator. Jihoon held his hand out before the doors could close, and the younger man managed to get in just in time.
"Thank you," he said breathlessly.
The elevator started going up, while the three of them stood in silence. However, Seokmin quickly took note of the big pink box Soonyoung was holding.
"Who gave you chocolates? Isn't it a little late."
"Jihoon got them for me," Soonyoung bragged.
"Is that true?" Seokmin looked over at Jihoon who nodded. "Wow, I almost thought you'd bite his head off after Soonyoung's live yesterday... I mean I know it was Carat Day, but I didn't expect you to do that in..."
Soonyoung tried to shush the younger man, but it was already too late. Jihoon sighed, and turned his head to the elevator doors again. Maybe turning off his phone for the night wasn't the best idea, even if it was worth it to spend a quiet evening with you.
"Soonyoung," Jihoon said with a stern voice. "What did you do in my studio?"
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sluttysnowangel666 · 3 months ago
Text
Home Is Where the Heart Is - jace velaryon x reader (request)
summary: in a modern au, jacaerys must return home from studying at uni to help his stepsister care for his younger siblings when their parents and brother die. The step-siblings already complicated relationship grows more and more tense given the circumstances, and they find themselves being each other’s source of comfort in hard times.
cw: stepsiblings, death, angst, grief, emetophobia warning, childhood trauma, modern au, modern!jace, smut, idiots in love, mutual pining, slow burn, talks of abusive/ unhealthy relationships, jealous jace, NO INCEST(except daenyra but like not really bc it’s au) not entirely canon, drinking, use of Y/N
this one was hard to write for me, given i’ve experienced parent loss. i put a lot of emotion and personal experience into this one so pls be gentle with this one if you don’t like it.
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I - The Leave
To say you and your step brother had tragic lives was a bit of an understatement.
Jace’s father, Harwin, had died in a fire when he was a young boy. Your mother had died in her birthing chambers having you. The paths your lives had been on as children shifted, leaving your parents to remarry when you and Jace were both only 15.
You initially did not get along. Jace did not like your father Daemon, and you did not like Jace’s mother Rhaenyra.
Over time though, you both acclimated to each other. You grew closer as the years aged you. By the time you both turned 19, you were thick as thieves. You had comforted each other through heartbreaks, similar childhood trauma, navigated what it meant to grow and change as people, and protected each other from the rest of the world.
Jacaerys was your best friend, and you were his. In another universe maybe, you could’ve been more than that. But it seemed in this world you were only meant to remain as blended family.
So when Jacaerys told you he was leaving to go across the country to Uni, your heart nearly split in two.
“What’s in Manchester?” You ask him.
“A school.” He replies sarcastically. You throw a pillow from his bed at him.
“No shit.” You say as he throws it back. “But why’d you pick one so far?”
He pauses, not wanting to reveal the honest answer. Truth be told, he found it more and more difficult to keep his secret around you. He needed to go simply for the fact he was falling in too deep, deeper than a stepbrother should fall for his sister.
It was hard seeing you every day of his life yet never being able to be with you. He saw you with other men, which ignited a jealousy in him he didn’t even know that he had. He couldn’t stand being around it, couldn’t stand lying to your parents when you snuck out of his bedroom window, couldn’t stand watching you allow yourself to get treated like shit by men who provided nothing. If you had been his… in another life… things would be different.
“I just think I’ve outgrown London.” He says, continuing to pack his clothes.
“I hope you love it.” You tell him. You were so sweet, so kind to everyone. You hadn’t deserved the hand life had dealt you. He only wished you could see the love you deserved, he wished he could show you.
He felt sad leaving you, but he felt better knowing you would be safe with mom and Daemon. He knew you would take good care Aegon and Viserys. He knew you would care for Joffrey and Luke too. Even though they weren’t your blood you loved them like they were.
“When do you go to get your rental car?” You ask him.
“In the morning. Then I’ll drive non stop to Manchester.”
“Hm.” You hum while petting his cat, Vermax. “He will miss you.”
“I trust you’ll take care of him for me.” Jace says.
“I will, besides he’ll have Arrax and Syrax to keep him company.”
“And what about you? Who will keep you company?”
“Don’t you worry about me, Jacaerys. I will get by.” You say. He looks at you, comfortable on his bed with Vermax on your lap. “Perhaps you’ll even meet a girl in Manchester.”
“Perhaps you’ll meet someone who won’t cheat on you.” He says, a random anger appearing out of nowhere.
“Don’t be fuckin’ rude, Jacaerys.” You say. “I’ve done nothing to anger you.”
“No, you’ve just allowed yourself to be treated like shit by men and I know you will continue to when I leave.”
“I don’t see how it’s your business anyway.” You say. “But be like that if you wish. I have a tampon I can throw in your bag if it’s that time of the month.”
He sneers at you, waving you away with his hand. You stand to leave. “Goodnight, Jacaerys.”
“Wait.” He says, grabbing your wrist as you open the door. “I’m sorry… I’m just… scared. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
“You have nothing to worry about Jacaerys.” You say, taking his hands in yours. “You’re gonna do great.”
You look into his eyes, but he looks past you at the door. His hand pushes it shut, and you look at it, then back at him. “Jace?”
He presses his lips onto yours and you pull away, shocked. You both stare into each other’s eyes in silence, both of you gasping in shock at what just happened.
Neither of you had any idea what to say to each other, so you pressed your lips back onto his. His hands rested on your waist, pulling you into him. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he backed you onto his bed. You landed on the pile of clothes on his bed, letting him in between your legs while playing with his pretty brown curls.
“Bubby!” Viserys yells, coming into Jace’s room. You practically kick Jacaerys onto the floor. Viserys doesn’t seem to notice what you two were both up to, too distracted with his mission. “Have you seen Aegon? We’re playing hide and seek, mommy said check in here.”
“No, Viserys! Get out.” Jace says on the floor. Viserys sticks his tongue out at him.
Your heart was racing from the fear of getting caught by your sibling, clarity hitting you in the face.
“I’ll help you find him, Vis.” You say, standing and leaving Jace’s room, avoiding Jace’s eyes that were pleading for you to stay.
The next morning you all woke early to say goodbye to Jacaerys. He’d wanted to text you during the night and ask you to come to his room so you both could talk, but he gave you your space.
Your family all said goodbye to Jace, helping him bring his bags to the car and giving him a tearful goodbye.
You waited by the car door and he walked over to you with a gentle smile. You both stared into each others eyes, pleading.
Tell me to stay. I’ll stay. His eyes begged yours.
Stay. Your eyes begged.
But in the end neither of you said a word. Instead you wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug, and he did the same.
He moved you by your hips away from the car door, getting inside and avoiding your eyes. Your family all waved goodbye to him, saying they loved and were proud of him.
He drove off, staring at you in the rear view mirror.
That was the last time your family was all together.
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II - The Photo
A few months had gone by since Jace left, and neither of you had spoken. You occasionally stalked his Instagram to see how he was doing though. He had been traveling, getting sunburnt, clubbing, DJing apparently. A hobby you hadn’t expected him to pick up, but one he had nonetheless. He had made two friends you noticed often, Cregan and Benjicot.
He was doing good. He was handsome, growing into a man. You missed him, in ways a stepsister shouldn’t miss her stepbrother. You dreamed of him often, even sneaking into his room at night every once in a while just because you missed his smell.
You stole oversized shirts he left behind, sleeping in them. You messed around on his PC, playing games like Roblox knowing he would get home and think it was Luke.
One day you had been mindlessly scrolling on Instagram when you saw Jace was tagged in a post by Cregan.
It was the two of them… and a girl. Jace’s arm was wrapped around her and they were practically connected at the hip. You gasped softly, trying to find who the girl was.
Her name was Sara, and she was obviously Cregan’s sister. They had the same sharp features.
“Slut.” You mumbled to yourself. You liked the post to be petty.
Jace’s heart dropped at the notification. It was the first interaction, if you could even call it that, that you two had shared since he left.
He wondered if you were jealous.
You were. You wondered if they were hooking up, or even dating.
They weren’t, she was a lesbian, but he knew the photo would get your attention.
Jace had told Cregan about your kiss, and Cregan wanting to be a wingman posted the photo in an attempt to get you to message Jace.
It didn’t work, and slowly you both started to move on from each other. You never exchanged any texts or calls or letters, and another year and a half would go by before you would reunite under the most unfortunate circumstances.
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III - The Loss
You’d awoke in the middle of the night to a frightening knock on your door, a knock that only comes when there is bad news.
And bad news had come indeed.
Rhaenyra and your father Daemon, as well as Lucerys died in a car accident.
The news was debilitating for you and your walls had broke down.
You called Jacaerys in the middle of the night, and when he seen that call he knew only the worst had happened.
He answered, his voice shaking. “Y/N?”
“Jacaerys.” You sobbed into the phone hysterically. “Jacaerys, come home please. You have to come home now.”
“Y/N, I’m on my way. Y/N, please please calm down, you’re scaring me. I’ll be there in the morning. Do you want me to stay on the phone with you?”
“No, Jacaerys, just please get home as soon as you can.” You sobbed, and he heard your brothers crying in the background too.
“Okay, okay.” He said, beginning to cry. Cregan heard the commotion and awoke from his side of the dorm.
“Are you alright, brother?” He asked, his voice groggy with sleep.
“I don’t know, I don’t know. Y/N called me freaking out, the twins and Joff were crying too. I don’t know what’s going on. I think it’s my parents.” Jace said crying.
“I’ll drive you to London.” Cregan said, immediately dressing.
“You-sob-don’t-sob-have to.” Jace cries.
“Dude, you’re in no condition to drive. Don’t worry about it.”
“B-But it’s a four hour drive and there’s-sob-classes-“
“Dude. It’s fine. Alpha Drac for life, right? I’ve gotchu.”
Cregan drove them to London without stopping once, speeding 15 over the limit the whole time. Jacaerys cried half the car ride, then fell asleep the second half.
Cregan pulled down your street, waking Jacaerys before reaching the driveway.
“Be safe. Call me when you can.” Cregan says, but Jace was already sprinting out of the car door and tripping up the stairs.
He burst into the door, saying your name, mom, luke, anyone.
He ran into the living room, waking you from the couch where you had pulled out the hide-a-bed and were sleeping with the twins and Joffrey.
You immediately started crying when you saw him, trying to stay quiet so you didn’t wake the boys.
“Oh, Jacaerys.” You pulled him into a hug, and you both sobbed into each other.
“Is it mom and Daemon?” He asked, knowing the answer but fearing the worst.
You nodded. “And Lucerys.”
Jace pulled away from you. “You’re lying.” He said in a whisper.
“No, Jacaerys, please listen-“ He turned and walked away from you upstairs. You followed right behind him as he turned into Luke’s empty room.
He fell onto Luke’s bed, screaming into the pillows. You laid behind him, rubbing his arm and sobbing into his back. You kissed his shoulders, quietly saying a prayer for your broken family.
He sat up, “Oh my god, I think I’m gonna be sick.” He said, leaving to the bathroom.
You followed again, holding his hair back as he got sick into the toilet and sobbed. You sat on the edge of the tub, and when he was done he rested his head onto your thighs continuously sobbing while you rubbed his hair and sobbed with him.
You eventually walked downstairs when the sun began to rise, and you both laid down and fell asleep next to your brothers, not letting go of each other once.
You both only slept for a few hours before you woke up, seeing your brothers awake and sitting in silence.
“Jace.” Joffrey said, and he and the twins all moved to lay on Jacaerys. He held them, wanting to cry more but there was nothing left.
“Kids?” The door opened and Rhaenyra’s aunt and uncle Rhaenys and Corlys, her cousin Laena, and your cousins Baela and Rhaena walked in.
Rhaenys and Corlys were also Jace, Joffrey and Luke’s godparents. Joffrey and Jace immediately greeted them, while you and the twins remained seated. They were not your family, and you had only met them a few times.
Your father could be an ass, so he had a lot of enemies you could say, including majority of Rhaenyra’s family.
Thankfully they had been kind and sympathetic of your grief and the twins as well, knowing you all were now also without a father and mother. They were your father’s enemies, but not yours.
Corlys and Rhaenys pleaded with you and Jace to foster Joffrey so they could teach him about the Velaryon family business in overseas trading, as they had done with Lucerys.
You wanted the best life for your siblings, so you let Jacaerys decide for his blood brother. You knew Joffrey would be better off with them and his older cousins, but Jace said no.
“Our family is here. We need to stay together from now on.” He told his aunt.
“Jacaerys, you’ll have to return to Uni at some point. You’re so close to being done. How do you expect Y/N to raise three children on her own so young?”
“I’m not going back.”
“Jacaerys!” You yelled at him. “You have to finish school.”
“No. My decision is final. We’re staying together. Nobody raise the matter again.”
The funeral was a few days after that, and it had brought all of Rhaenyra’s family as well as Daemon’s weird and mysterious friends from all over the world.
People gave you and Jace their condolences, as well as tons of money. You knew Rhaenyra was rich from inheriting her father Viserys’ estate, which Jace would now inherit in turn, but Rhaenyra’s cousins and aunts and uncles and friends wanted to make sure you both were well set on top of that inheritance so that you and Jace could take care of your siblings with no trouble.
It was a generous thing, money, but it didn’t bring your family back. It didn’t matter how many checks they wrote, you couldn’t cash them to heaven.
“Brother.” A deep voice said.
You and Jace turn your heads to see Cregan and his sister approaching you.
“Cregan?” Jace embraced him in a hug, both of them holding each other for a moment.
“Hi, I’m Sara.” Sara said, taking the moment to introduce herself. “I’ve heard nice things about you.”
You turned your nose up at her, thinking she was being sarcastic. She wasn’t but despite your attitude she was polite to you anyway, knowing you were heavy with grief.
“It’s nice to meet you, I’m sorry it couldn’t be under better circumstances.” Cregan says to you, hugging you as well. You appreciated them coming, knowing it meant a lot to Jacaerys to have them there.
Jace took your hand in his, both of you in all black, staring at the three caskets. You thought he held your hand for your comfort, but it was for his.
The guilt Jace felt was huge. He hadn’t been there, he had left to Uni for his own selfish reasons. It didn’t matter how many people told him it was okay, he was trying to get an education, it wasn’t the real reason he was there. He left to get away from you.
And that own selfish reason he had for leaving… he thought it could be the reason why your parents and brother were now in the ground. If he had stayed, they might have too.
“Jace?” Your voice was muffled. “Jacaerys?”
“Hm?” He asked, your voice pulling him back to reality.
“They want you to say a few words.” You said. He looked around, noticing his family was looking to him to say the final goodbyes.
“Will you come with me?” He asked. You nodded, standing with him to look over the caskets.
He said a few words of love and praise to his now lost family, holding your hand the whole time. You both couldn’t recall what he said, only having said it for the others around you.
You both grabbed a pile of dirt, throwing it onto the caskets. Jace winced when it landed on Luke’s.
“Are you okay?” You asked, rubbing his arm. He shook his head no. You brought his head to your lips, pressing a gentle kiss on his temple. “Me either. But we’ll be okay… someday.”
He liked to believe that what you were saying was true.
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IIII - The Recovery
Jacaerys moved home, taking a leave of absence from Uni. They were more than generous with him, giving him as much time as he wanted to decide when to return. You begged him to reconsider, but he was set in his decision.
You both stepped into a parental role, playing mommy and daddy 24/7. And by god’s grace for some reason those kids to listened to you.
You did everything Rhaenyra and Daemon had done like bathing, cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc. You and Jace had become a power duo at the household chores just like they had.
Neither of you worked, taking time off to grieve and you also really didn’t need to work due to Jace’s inheritance.
You both contemplated moving. The house held bad memories for you both, but you dared not touch your parents and Luke’s room. Neither of you had the strength to even go in the rooms anymore, nor uproot your little brother’s lives by making them move from the house they were raised in.
You and Jace never talked about the night before he left, instead focusing on the chaos of two teenagers raising three young, rambunctious boys.
A year went by of this lifestyle, making it three years since your initial kiss and a year of your parent’s and brother’s passing.
In a way, you both had moved on. You were older, forced to mature quicker than you’d have liked, raising three kids, unable to focus on the past of what once could have been.
Cregan and Sara moved down to London following their final year at Uni, requesting you both to come out and celebrate their birthday.
You both hesitantly agreed, given the boys had all just left a day before to be with Rhaenys and Corlys for the summer, and you had not experienced what it was like to still be a young adult in almost a year.
You had nearly forgot life could be fun when you weren’t being a parent.
You all met up at a sports bar since Cregan had wanted to watch a soccer game, and it was packed.
You managed to find a table, but it did hardly anything. Bodies were packed in there like sardines to see the world cup final.
You and Sara both sat, sipping on a cocktail while the boys got more drinks. You weren’t particularly keen on being left there alone with her, given you hadn’t cared for her since you didn’t know what had gone on between her and Jace when they were at Uni.
You made polite small talk, but Sara was a certified yapper. She’d find anything to keep the dying conversation going.
“Do you have a boyfriend?” Sara asked.
“Uh, nah. Haven’t really had the time nor the want with the kids and all.” You said, sipping your drink.
“Maybe you ought give girls a try.” She said. “I did once and I’ve never gone back since.”
“Yeah, maybe.” You chuckled. “Wait, what?”
“What?”
“You’re… a lesbian?”
“Don’t look so surprised.” She said.
“Well, I thought you and Jacaerys-“
She spit her drink out onto you, laughing at even the idea. You wiped your face off with a napkin, trying not to smash your drink upside her head.
“And this whole time I had no idea why you hated me.” She sat back, crossing her arms and smirking. “No wonder… This whole time you thought I was in love with Jacaerys.”
You couldn’t hide the little smile that crept on your face.
“Oh, sweet thing… Jacaerys is all yours.” She looked over at him at the bar. “I think he always has been.”
“So… were there any girls at Uni?” You asked.
“A few.” She mumbled, hesitant on telling you. “I’m sure you had a few back here as well.”
She wasn’t wrong, but it still hurt knowing Jace had moved on too during the time. It hurt knowing girls were getting his love that you desperately craved.
“He told me and Cregan about your kiss.”
“That was a long time ago.” You say. “We both have bigger things to worry about now rather than a moment in time three years ago.”
“I know you love your brothers, Y/N. I know Jace does too.” Sara says. “But don’t forget to take care of yourself. It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.”
You looked at Jace, who was making his way back to your table with more drinks. His eyes caught yours, and he smiled at you. He didn’t do that a lot anymore since they died.
“I got you a negroni, my lady.” Jace says, setting your drink in front of you. You roll your eyes with a smirk.
The four of you drank all night while watching the game, you and Jace loosening up the more alcohol you consumed.
The night had spiraled out of control, the four of you separating from each other.
You found yourself at the bar, ordering more drinks, Sara was in the bathroom with a girl, Cregan was busy arguing and growing closer to a fist fight with Germany fans, and Jacaerys was busy searching for you on the wrong side of the bar.
A man sat beside you by the bar while you waited.
“Her next drink’s on me.” He said to the bartender.
“No, that’s fine actually. I’ve got a tab open. My drunk friends will find out in the morning they paid for it.”
He laughed, and a blush creeped across your cheeks. “What if I had been ordering 15 shots? Then what would you have done?”
“I would have paid for 15 shots.” It was your turn to laugh now.
“What’s your name, pretty?”
“Y/N. What’s yours?”
“Jason Lannister.”
“Nice to meet you.” You say. He was kinda cute, and the thought made Sara’s words from earlier echo in your head.
It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.
“Actually, you can pay for my drink.” You say.
He smirks, pulling out his wallet. “What’s your poison?”
“Surprise me.”
He bought you both a few rounds of shots, and you grew more confident and more drunk with each one.
“I’m gonna use the bathroom.” You drunkenly slur.
“Do you want me to come with you?” He asks. You say yes, taking his hand and dragging him along behind you.
You got lost on the way to the bathroom, instead ending up dancing in the middle of the floor.
You were chest to chest with him, his hand on your lower back as you leaned up to kiss him. Your hands held tight onto the collar of his shirt, which was keeping you from falling. He matched your energy with the kiss, his hand tangling in your hair.
His other hand snaked its way to your inner thigh, his fingers tickling the skin under your skirt.
“What the fuck are you doing?!”
“Huh?” You pulled away to ask Jason, drunkenly wondering how he was able to talk while kissing you.
But it wasn’t him yelling, it was Jace.
Time slowed down for a second, and it all happened in slow motion as you watched Jace swing his arm to hit Jason in the jaw.
Jason stumbled, holding his jaw and glancing back and forth between you, Jace, and Cregan who had noticed the commotion and came to back up Jace.
“The fuck, Y/N?!” Jason yelled at you, pushing your shoulder lightly, but you were drunk and uncoordinated so you fell.
Jacaerys practically jumped on Jason after that, punching him over and over in the face.
“Jacaerys, stop, now!” You yelled. “Cregan, stop him!”
Cregan didn’t help the situation, only helping Jacaerys jump Jason.
“Oh my fuckjng God.” You yelled to yourself, trying to pull Cregan and Jacaerys off of Jason.
Bar security came, kicking you all out and banning you forever. You didn’t care about that though, you were just pissed at Jace for embarrassing you like that.
You, Cregan, Jace, and Sara took the taxi home in silence.
Cregan and Sara had immediately went to bed downstairs, while you angrily stormed up to your room.
“Are you seriously angry with me?” Jace asked, following you into your room and closing the door.
“Get out, Jacaerys.” You said, both of you sober by this point from all the adrenaline of the last hour of events.
“I was just protecting you!”
“From what?” You laugh, frustrated.
He had no answer. He knew he had only attacked the guy out of jealously, seeing you kiss a man that should have been him.
“Why would you do that?” He asks, his voice laced with sadness.
“Do what?” You ask, rubbing your eyes as you felt a headache forming.
“Kiss him.” He said. You sighed.
“Because I wanted to. I don’t need you protecting me.” You looked at Jace, his signature pout forming. You glanced down to his hands, which were bloody and bruised.
“Jesus.” You mumbled. “Come on.”
You pulled him to the bathroom, making him sit on the toilet while you cleaned and bandaged his hand. He watched you the whole time, your eyebrows knit together as you focused on his wounds.
It was there it hit him, that he loved you. He was tired of burying that feeling. He loved you. He loved how you took care of your siblings, he loved how you immediately stepped into the role of a mother without ever complaining, he loved his life with you.
His hand caressed your cheek.
“Stop, I don’t want you to hurt yourself anymore than you have.” You say. His fingers were gently gliding over your jaw, eventually taking a hold of it to make you look at him.
Your heart was racing, you knew what he was feeling because you felt it too.
“You’re mine.” He said, and without even thinking you smashed your lips onto his. He pulled you onto his lap, his damaged hands loosely resting on your waist.
Three years it had been since your first kiss, three years of longing and aching for him, trying to let the feeling go for the sake of your children.
It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.
You pulled him into his room, kicking the door shut as you fell onto his bed, just like the first time.
He nestled between your legs, kissing you intently. He moved his lips down, pressing kisses on your neck and chest.
You whimpered, your fingers toying in his hair.
“I need you, Jacaerys.” You whisper.
“Fuck, I need you more.” He whispers back.
You sit up on your knees as Jacaerys stands. You pull his shirt gently off him, avoiding his hands, and move to helping him undo his belt and pants until he’s in only his boxers.
You undress your torso, then wiggling to kick off your skirt to reveal your thin little panties.
“You might have thought you had a mission but really you had a death wish going out in those.” Jace said, pressing his lips onto the thin black lace. He kisses your wetness, moving your panties to the side so he can eat. His tongue glides into your cunt, making sure to lick and taste the sweetest parts.
“So possessive, and for what?” You moan, your fingers gripping his curls.
“Because you’re mine.” He says into your heat, and you moan at his voice.
He eats you with a burning desire, a taste he had dreamt about for years. He’s messy, yet coordinated, kissing and sucking just the right spots to make you melt onto his tongue. He was starved for you, and now he eats as if he’ll never eat again.
You chase the release, grinding your hips into his face.
“I’m gonna cum, oh my god.” You whine, your hand trembling in his curls. He moans into your heat, pushing you over the edge. You spill onto his tongue, and he doesn’t miss a drop, licking as long as he can until you’re shaking.
You go to kiss him, but he pulls away. “I’ve still got you on my lips, I wanna savor it as long as I can.”
“You can’t share?” You tease.
He shivers at your words. “Ooh, don’t test me.”
You settle for kissing his neck instead, pulling him by his hips between your legs to make him grind onto you.
You feel his length inside his boxers against your heat, and you shiver at the size.
“Don’t keep me waiting any longer, Jace.”
“How long have you been waiting exactly?” He teases.
“A long time. Longer than three years.” You say. He finally presses his lips back onto yours, his hand weakly kneading your breast. You gently take his hand in yours, guiding his weak fingers.
“I wish my hands weren’t numb.” He moans between kisses.
“What-“
“Sh, it’s fine, just keep kissing me.” He says, refusing to let you break away. His tongue plays with yours, and your lips are bruised and swollen from the eagerness of his.
“You’re playing a dangerous game.” You moan, trying to push down his boxers to rub his length.
“Just like you were at the bar, walking around in that tight little black skirt, kissing on guys who had no business even breathing the same air as you.
You finally reach your hand in his boxers, eliciting a gasp from him as you rub his length. You push his boxers down, and he pulls your panties off you.
You rub his length against your wet slit, moaning as you guide him inside you.
“Baby.” He moans. You shiver at the pet name, wanting to hear more of his sweet voice. He rests his weight on his fore arms, kissing and sucking on your neck to leave marks. His thrusts are fueled with love, unlike ones you’ve felt before from others.
He fucks you so sweetly, pulling away your neck so he can look in your eyes. He holds your hips into the bed, fucking you. You moan and whine, gripping his wrists for support.
“Say you’re mine.” He moans.
“I’m yours. Fuck, Jace, I’m all yours.”
“Yes, my girl. Fuck, you’re so wet.” He says, his words sultry and low.
“I’m so in love with you.” You moan, lost in lust.
“I wish I could fuck you all night long.”
“Don’t worry.” You moan. “We’ve got a lifetime to do that.”
“Fuck, I love you so much.” Jace moans. “I’m so in love with you it hurts.”
He nestles into your neck, and you hold him close to you, moaning in his ear.
You feel his thrusts grow sloppy, and he shakes as he grows close to his release. He fucks you so deep his pelvic bone rubs your clit, drawing you closer too.
You pull him by his neck into your lips again as you both cum. He fills you up, warm and deep inside your stomach as he moans into your lips.
“Fuck, fuck.” He pulls out, gasping. He looks into your eyes, both of you catching your breath and coming down from what just happened.
“Are you alright? I wasn’t too rough, was I?” He asks, still shaking him his release.
“No, Jace.” You say, tucking a curl behind his ear. “You were perfect.”
“I’m sorry about tonight.”
“Nothing to be sorry for.”
He lays beside you, resting his head on your shoulder. “What happens now?”
“We…” You say, not knowing where to start.
Your whole life had been uprooted. Both of you had done nothing for yourselves, until now. You both had a choice to make. You could quit living half a life, one foot in one foot out the door, doing your duty yet nothing for yourself. Or, you could get busy living. Take care of your brothers, love each other endlessly, make the most out of your life and your love like your parents would have wished for you both.
“I think we just start enjoying it.”
“Enjoying what?”
“Our lives.” You look at him, and you take his bruised hand in yours.
“Together.”
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rosesrotofficial · 2 months ago
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hi, i just wanted to ask why did ronin and angel break up? also, love your game, i think ive replayed it around 5 times now. thanks for answering, if you do <3
i have lots of thoughts about this... i feel like to explain why they broke up u need to know why they got together:
ronin and angel got together partly out of proximity: feeling like they were the only ones that understood each other. they were also the only people in the server at that point which meant for about 2 weeks it was just them flirting.
angel felt safe with ronin bc unlike the men she's been with before, he actually respects her boundaries and genuinely cares about her (the bar is in hell). the fact that ronin's a trans guy helps, too: angel felt a sense of safety in his transness cause like he's dealt with everything that comes with growing up afab; he understands in a way that her past relationships don't, or don't care to understand. and ronin is quite the devilish gentleman. like angel says in game, being with ronin is the first time she truly felt safe with anyone.
as an additional point, i think angel feels guilty about "using" ronin in this sense and fears invalidating his masculinity; "does ronin think that i think he's not 'really a man' which is why i'm with him and feel safe with him?? because i don't think that" but i feel like that's a whole other ask haha. angel has a lot to unpack i'm ngl. anyway ronins answer to that is stop worrying your pretty little head.
ronin felt safe with angel because he was subconsciously projecting ther, his first love (who he still has a lot of unprocessed feelings about) onto angel. angel gives him the push-pull of ther, but without the heartbreak that came with them. angel is "his girl", now, someone he can focus on and care about, someone that he can be with, who acts similar enough to ther that he can almost pretend it's them. (as for a fun fact, angel's VA is ther's VA from gluttony gods!) even though angel's not and will never be.
angel and ronin's relationship was more out of necessity: it helped angel process her feelings about men (to an extent) and helped ronin get closure too. after realising this though, they realised they worked better as friends - because they were mutually using the other to cope and process feelings, even if it was mutually beneficial.
thank you for your ask! <3 i'm glad you enjoyed the game so much :3
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justcallmesakira · 9 months ago
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HIIIIII
okay, so how about, chuuya, atsushi, dazai, and nikolai with a s/o who loves dresses gothy??? they act cold and mean around others too, other then them?
yayay tyyy, remember i luv youuuu
"Skulls and hearts"
Sypnosis: You are the epitome of goth and a breeze of coldness, how do these lovely men take care of you?
Genre: romance, suggestive (slightly)
Warnings: reader is more of goth lolita than like abosolute goth bcs i have no knowledge on goth, suggestive on chuuya, one wednesday addams joke, please lmk if i didnt manage to quite reach the goth culture-
A/N: HII sweetie hru? just wanted to say i put more of a lolita goth since i am not educated well on it lol-
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DAZAI was definetly fascinated by your style, infact when he first saw your dark attire on the day you entered the agency to file a report, his eyes were already sparkled!
The way you spoke so confidently and was non-chalant about it and everything, your formal attire, everything piqued him.
Especially the cold air surrounding you with your blue hued gaze. He love how you did your make up so much you could call it a mini crush at first sight.
So to fill his intrests he decided to stop you for a while to maybe use his charms but unfortuantly for him it obviously did not work out with how deadly your gaze is
"If looks could kill..." he had thought to himself.
Overtime he had started to court you and all though you despised his annoying tactics he seemed quite cute to you so you accepted his "love" for you
He even bragged about how cool and pretty his new girlfriend was all day at the agency especially when you dropped off his lunch at the office saying "I aint nobodys petty little housewife but here`s your lunch, bandaged idiot. Next time i will throw your lunch down the sewers where your rat friend lives" You had spitted t out loud.
Even the agency is piqued in you and your creative insults which you throw at him whenever he does soemthing stupid For example: "Bandagedass" "Suicidal loverman who cant even fix his clothes" "Charming bedbug i picked up from the trash" "Idiot with a handsome face'' and so on!
But ofc like the masochist he his he loves listening to them which made you creeped out and made you use much appropriate words to insult him.
He definetly tries to rile you up by saying suggestive stuff by playing with the hem of your black laced skirt, push him ten feet away if he does because you wotn be able to do that when you get home...*wink wink*
He loves your music taste, though he isnt into goth culture he loves it when you tell him about goth subculture, it reminds him how your closer and more vulnerable around him than anyone else.
You gave him some goth themed band-aids to put around his bandaged arms and neck which he shows them off like a badge of honor!
Put your makeup away from him though he will probably mess it up and make himself look like if wednesday went through a bad eye day.
And later after scolding him for going through your stuff you finally taught him how to properly do goth makeup.
You even taught him some gothic slurs to throw at anyone who tries to disturb him though he will probably use them is someone insults you which we will be on about now.
If someone dares to insult your gloomy atire, well he doesnt need to say anything because you are there already with your gaze sharper than your eyeliner.
But even so hes ready to take care of his goth gf who only soften around him anytime, anywhere!
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Of course CHUUYA supports your style why wouldnt he?
If anything the first time you two had met he had a mutual intrest for you, "how pretty yet terrifying at the same time" he thought.
Soon enough he put up the courage to speak to you though the atmosphere around you was quite cold
He didnt really like people who had arrogance in their personality but you maybe seemed nice to aproach.
Of course the person you are you kept calm and maintained formality, if so you looked quite elegant.
Time passed, dates were booked, hands were slid. He finally confessed to you and you calmly smiled at him.
God...how he loved seeing your eyes soften and your matte lipstick lips form into a small smile at his smallest gestures.
Like buying you all types of goth culured dress since he doesnt know what tyoe you wear and he doesnt want to disrespect goth people
And seeing that smile and light hue of happiness form on your beautifully done cheeks
He loves complimenting you too, all the time!
"Babe you look so pretty right now," "Do you like that dress over there? The laces might suite your skin" "That evangeline themed makeup set...The colours suite your eyelids." "All dressed and pretty just for me to ruin,,,Hahh you really want to rile me up, doll, Dont ya?"
He CAN and WILL buy you the whole fricking hot topic.
Oh you like a chain belt there? frick it buys you the whole belt section. Oh you liked the glossy purple lipstick at the side walk shop? buys 10 different shades.
Hes an executive ofcourse he will buy you everything!
Chuuya can make a few suggestive comments too,,,yknow.
"Wow, doll you do your makeup so well? You could be a professional you know?" "Oh chuuya, how you fluster me'' "Well...professional or not imma` bout to ruin that makeup so bad right now."
Dont worry he will help you clean up the mess he did to your face later. Afterall he loves a cute little goth gf!
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I wont deny it but ATSUSHI was quite scared by you at first glance, but warmed up soon when he realises that your not half bad afterall
He had met you at cafe uzumaki sipping on a coffee cup while sketching, wow, the fancy sketchbook and the fact that you were drawing while wearing long black dimond studded nails really made him admire you
Though he was shy at first since you had this shilling aura around you, he still took a breathe and walked over you
You kept looking at him up and down as he nervously tries to introduce himself which makes you break your demeaner and let out a soft chuckle "Oh my...what a wonderful laugh they have..."
So the conversation between you two started, infact while conversing you had drawn a very neat sketch of him with your skull printed pencil.
He was definetly shocked on how you drew him so well in such short time.
Over the agency work days, atsushi was quite a bit nervous, which dazai made a few jokes about him having a crush on "The cafe's goth girl"
And so you two became a thing! well after atsushi got somehow rid of his nervousness
Except your the boyfriend in this relationshio ;D
He tries to buy you stuff though, but you always deny and take him to oth stores at the corners of yokohama, to say the least your better guided than him.
I am sure the agency also warmed ap at you! not since whenever you would always have this threatening aura with a ravishing face of dark-hued makeup but when he turned around to speak to you
Your all soft smiling and tilted eyes.
You even dressed him up in goth clothes one time which he looked a bit too silly in.
If dazai ever saw atsushi in scene clothes though...he wil definetly say something like "Ohohoho you two remind me of Morticia addams and um, oh yeah! Gomez addams Hahaha, wait then kyouka can be your..."
You instantly went "Atsushi please, tell your STEROTYPICAL, UNFUNNY, MENTALLY ILL father to get the fuck out of here and go try to drown himself or something"
So now, not only is atsushi scared of you so is dazai!!
He still loves you and your style though, who wouldnt because i would love a goth s/o who would put on the most gorgeous make up ever and rai--
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...
He`s both barking and joining your cult.
JUST KIDDING-
NIKOLAI obviously fell in love with your sass at first sight! What an independant and cool woman! he had thought when his emerald and blue eye fell upon you.
You werent even scared of his illy and outrageous tactics instead you just rolled your eyes at him as if hes some freak
Now this is intresting.
I think nikolai has prefernces for goth lolita so if by any chance thats your aesthetic get ready to be filled with flirts and touchiness
He just cant help it! Your so cold to him but cant you see how intrested he is in you? not just your style but your whole personality he loves analizing people!
Which you find about after many tries of him trying for you to at least speak with him, He was annoying especially during the first stages of your relationship
But soon enough you warmed up, realising that though hes a bit fucked up in the head hes quite chill and fun to hang around.
Niko definetly uses his ability to steal your favourite items from hot topic, so be prepared when you see your vanity filled with all kinds of stygian clothes, lingerine, cropped tops, fishnets, corsets, puffy skirts, makeup etc.
That act made you more soft around him and hes just giddy he got to make his infamous "gloomy" dove smile :D
You help him dress up sometimes too, maybe drawing out long triangles under his eyes for his next show or maybe putting on some dark lipstick just to smooch his neck.
Okay i can defiently see him and you be great fashionistas! One with clownish crimson and black attire and the other with a menacing aura of a maginficent raven (got the reference?)
He is just into you okay? Dont question it!
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A/N: i had a bit too much fun writing this lol BY THE WAY GUYS DONT BE OFFENDED BY THE JOKE MY HUBBY MADE AT ATSUSHIS PART, HES JUST A LIL SILLY :33
Divider crds!: @firefly-graphics
Tags: @heartsfourdazai @silverbladexyz @ruanais @biscuits-spooky-corner @riiwrites @chuuyasboner @atlasnessie @saelique @tsuunara @elizais
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mithliya · 5 months ago
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i’m getting spammed with anon hate and i honestly don’t think this place is redeemable so im probs not going to be posting for idk how long. radblr has given me less than nothing. since joining radblr, people have overwhelmingly been unbelievably cruel to me.
my first year on radblr, women 1-2 decades older than me viciously harassed me for asking questions as someone not familiar with certain beliefs held here. these women harassed me for months non-stop, posted my full legal name, posted homes neighbouring where i lived in bahrain, and essentially released my private information. i had to threaten them back just in hopes they would leave me alone, which they didn’t really do. they simply stopped posting my name bc they wanted to make me look like im bad for finding one of their names simply by googling her url (her full name was her twitter username). one of the people in that circle was radicaldumbass, who then came back as macroclit, and again came back as radicalstoner. i moved on but i haven’t forgotten.
then, black-diaspora repeated the same thing. she posted pictures of my mother and led people to finding my mom's facebook. to this day, i still get anons with my mother’s name and my sister’s name. my sister was about 13 when anons first started sending me her name in threatening anons. somehow, black-diaspora was rewritten as a victim of mine despite her being repeatedly racist & lesbophobic to me & posting my mom’s info.
i was being abused by my ex-gf and women on here literally picked my abuse apart and enabled TRAs like lostelvenqueen to make up lies that i was the one abusing my abuser. that vicious lie was reiterated for 4 years. while being abused, women on radblr were mocking me for needing money when my ex-girlfriend was actively stealing from me at the time. to this day people use against me the fact that i needed help in that time bc some mutuals helped finance 2 dinners & my medication, all of which i either paid them back for or drew art as payment.
then, again, another woman dug through an old blog i ran as a teenager and found some posts here and there to make it seem like i, as a 15 and 16 year old, definitely loved being totally controlled by someone and physically abused whenever i didn’t follow his exact commands. i spoke openly about this trauma years prior to this person “exposing” me & arguing that i actually wanted that abuse by pointing to random innocuous posts and forming a story out of it. i think every abuse victim can imagine how difficult it is to still face trauma from something and instead of being allowed to heal, having it brought up to you several days a week to taunt you and having “feminists” tell you that you actually wanted it and are lying when you say otherwise. to this day, i get daily anons mentioning my name because this woman also put my legal name out there.
women here have put me in physical danger, they have made up the vilest lies about me, they’ve called me racial slurs, they’ve been outright racist to me, they’ve speculated about my rape & abuse, they’ve joked about lynching me, they’ve questioned things as minuscule as what i had for dinner. and despite that, i haven’t returned that same treatment. i remained relatively consistent, i simply criticised what i thought was wrong and provided evidence to my statements.
i made some nice friends on here & i’ll keep talking to them. but i’m going to be reevaluating why i’m wasting my time in a space that has overwhelmingly caused me stress, a space where countless unbelievable lies have been spun about me and a place where people have said & done the vilest things and in the end, i was always framed as a bad person based on half-truths or outright lies. now, people falsely claim that women who unfollow me or block me risk having their private information exposed, when i have met at least a dozen women from radblr and run a server with hundreds of women from radblr, have seen hundreds of faces, and have never exposed such information even if we end up disliking each other. i could tolerate many ridiculous lies, but why should i? i’m pretty fed up of tolerating this.
enjoy spinning this however you want and lying about me further. idk when i’ll be back or if i’ll want to be back. it’s pretty clear to me that this space prioritises lesbophobes & racists (& sometimes even downright misogynists) over people who calmly criticise it. i joined this space initially bc i thought it was somewhere where i could freely be a lesbian without being hassled for it, but radblr doesn’t even offer that anymore.
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luminoustarlight · 1 year ago
Text
Passionfruit | Anakin Skywalker
Ingesting a foreign fruit leaves you and Anakin feeling strange.
rating: explicit | pairing: anakin skywalker x afab!jedi!reader | wc: 2.1k | read on ao3 warnings: literally no plot, just porn, SMUT [sex pollen of sorts, mildly dub con due to sex pollen, mutual masturbation, blowjob, cum swallowing, anakin spits in readers mouth, unprotected p in v, creampie, dirty talk], swearing
kind of but not really inspired by passionfruit by drake but covered by scary pockets. i really just use song titles as my titles bc I'm uncreative and lazy.
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As soon as you and Anakin reach the ship, you both know something is wrong. 
It’s in the way your conversation halts, the way Anakin looks at you with inky pupils bleeding into his blue eyes, the way you suddenly feel like you can’t breathe. Your first thought is that you’ve been drugged. You’ve been together the whole day, you haven’t encountered any suspicious beings, you’ve eaten the same things—  “The fruit…” you mumble. 
Anakin is peeling off his black robe because his skin is so hot, he feels like he’s going to burn right through the fabric. “What?”
“The fruit!” you repeat, tugging at the collar of your tunic. The symptoms wash over you like a tsunami making landfall. Instantly and violently. Sweat has formed across your brow, your entire nervous system is on fire and your cunt has started to ache. 
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Anakin shouts, now undoing his utility belt and taking off the rest of his layers. “Maker, why is it so fucking hot in here?” 
He doesn’t mean to be cross with you, he’s just so fucking confused. Nothing makes sense. He has one singular thought. I need to fuck. 
He’s so painfully hard, he’s not sure if he has ever felt this miserable. This desperate. He needs his hand around his dick or better yet, slipped inside a tight pussy. He’s pretty sure it’s the only thing that will make him feel better. 
With Anakin’s broad chest and chiseled abdomen on display, it makes it impossible for you to make sense of the mess in your mind. You feel drunk, weak knees wobbling as you literally cannot resist the urge to touch yourself. 
Before you’re even conscious of it, you’re ridding yourself of your Jedi robes and everything else except for your bandeau and underwear. It’s an out of body experience realizing that you’ve stripped yourself almost bare without consciously thinking ‘ I’m going to take my clothes off ’. 
You’ve read about certain flora and fauna like this in the library at the Temple. Certain foods and flowers are known aphrodisiacs, containing a chemical that puts the person who is exposed to it in the mood. However, there are some that are so potent, it quite literally makes the person so aroused, the only way to remedy the symptoms is to orgasm. If you try to explain all of that to your Jedi companion, the one you’ve known since you were younglings, the words would come out as mush. 
“Fruit… horny… we need to-fuck,” your already weak train of thought gets even more derailed once Anakin starts palming himself over his pants. 
Anakin’s brow furrows but he doesn’t stop running his hand over his bulging dick. I want it in my mouth, you think. Although the fruit has left you and Anakin with the insatiable need to fuck, you feel a pit of shame in your stomach. Sex is not forbidden as a Jedi, but it’s not something you regularly practice. You usually take care of it yourself, as you’re too afraid to partake in something so intimate with a stranger. It makes you wonder if Anakin simply uses his hand or goes out of his way to find someone to have sex with… 
Possession quickly swallows up all of the shame you were feeling. Imagining Anakin with his lips on someone else, his cock inside someone else, making someone else cum— it makes you want to puke. You want him all to yourself. He’s your best friend, you’ve saved each other’s skin countless times, your bond is like no other. And now it’s going to be irrevocably changed because of something you ingested. Not because you finally acted on your true feelings for him. 
“The- the fruit made us… fuck,” Anakin groans. “I need to take my cock out, it hurts so much.” 
“I know, Ani,”  you watch him intently, impulses absolutely impossible to ignore. As he removes his pants and takes a firm hold of his cock, your hand slips beneath the waistband of your underwear and you begin rubbing quick circles over your clit. “Oh…” you whimper, even though you’ve barely scratched the surface of satisfaction. 
“Take it off,” he says darkly. His dick is throbbing and leaking an obscene amount of precum. His hand moves up and down with ease, brushing his thumb over his tip with each upward stroke. “Take off the rest of your fucking clothes, Y/N. I need to see you.” 
You nod, wriggling out of your underwear and slipping your bandeau over your head. Your fingers are back inside of you, prodding as deep as you can go. Anakin is going feral watching you fuck yourself with your fingers. Pretty tits on display for him, even more perfect than he imagined. 
Maker, he’s in awe of you. He always thought you were cute growing up. But then you seemed to blossom overnight and suddenly you were a woman. He wants to worship every inch of you, run his hands over the hills and valleys of your body, and then he wants to fuck you stupid. To fuck you so hard you’re screaming nothing but his name and seeing stars. 
“Keep touching yourself, Ani. It’s the only way we’ll feel better.” 
The wet sounds of both of your sexes fill the hull of the ship and you think briefly, that this is one of the worst places to experience the effects of a foreign fruit. At least it’s just the two of you on this mission. Just the two of you, the most mischievous Jedi pair the Order has ever seen, mutually masturbating in a Republic commissioned ship. And it’s not enough. Your fingers have never felt so pointless and disappointing in your entire life.
 “More…” you mumble, pulling your fingers from your cunt as they were doing you no good. “Anakin, I need more.” 
“Fuck,” he breathes, bottom lip catching between his teeth. Your pussy clenches pitifully as you imagine what it’d feel like to be filled with Anakin’s cock. He’s thick and long, and you’ve never particularly thought of dicks as pretty, but Stars, if Anakin’s isn’t the definition of pretty then you don’t know what is. “I’m gonna cum- I can’t help it, angel. It’s- fuckfuckfuck-” 
You’re in front of Anakin in a flash, dropping to your knees and throwing your mouth over his cock just as he begins to cum. Anakin can’t help but push you further down his length, groaning loudly when you choke on him. “Shit- that’s it, choke on my cock, baby.” Anakin pushes your hair away from your face to see you looking up at him with the wickedest eyes. He knows you need more and even though he’s just cum himself, he doesn’t feel too much better. It’s a good thing he was going to fuck you regardless. 
Your nose is nuzzled against his tuft of hair and the musky scent of him makes you dizzy. You’re rubbing your clit again, but it’s no use. Nothing is going to make you feel better but Anakin. You’d settle for his fingers or even his mouth. You just need him. 
Once Anakin is sure he’s milked everything out, he pulls his cock out of your mouth. There’s still cum on your tongue when he leans down to kiss you, pulling you up from the ground with just his hand around your neck. Your tongues dance around each other briefly before Anakin breaks away. “Open.” 
You open your mouth and Anakin spits the cocktail of your saliva and his cum back into your mouth. It’s the most erotic thing you’ve ever experienced. It makes your whole predicament worse. It’s actually cruel that Anakin has already cum and you’re still miserable. You’re still suffering the effects of the fruit. “Ani, please. I need to-” 
“Get on the floor,” he orders. “On your back.” 
You don’t need to be told twice. You hiss at the cool metal flooring of the ship, but it’s honestly like an ice pack on a battle wound. It feels amazing against the burning inferno you’re feeling from the inside out. This isn’t how Anakin imagined ravishing you. Ideally, he’d make you writhe against the mattress with his fingers, then with his mouth. It isn’t until you’ve cum at least twice, does he go about making you cum around his cock. But unfortunately, urgency is of the utmost importance. 
As he lifts your leg over his shoulder, his cock brushes against your folds. You whimper at the all-too-brief contact with his weeping tip. He’s going to stretch you out, going to hit so deeply you won’t be able to fucking walk for a day. “Oh my Gods, Anakin, please. I feel like I’m dying.” 
His perfect pink lips form a devilish smirk before he finally, finally pushes himself into you. Immediately, the fire feels like it’s beginning to extinguish. He hasn’t even begun to move yet. “Need my cock to save you, baby?” 
Your eyes roll to the back of your head and you wish you cared enough to come up with a retort but it just feels so good to have Anakin inside of you. “Sh-shut up,” you clench your walls to tease him back. “Fuck me, Anakin. Hard.” 
“You’re gonna get it hard for being a little bitch just then.” Anakin nips at your ankle as he draws his cock almost entirely out of your cunt before ramming back in so forcefully it makes you scream. Like, bloody murder scream. “Louder, honey. I can’t hear you,” he taunts.
“Fuck!” Your arms stretch above your head, gripping onto the grated floor so you aren’t pushed away with each demanding thrust Anakin delivers. There’s no finesse to it, really, he’s just fucking you hard like you asked. His knees are probably aching from the uncomfortable surface of the floor but he doesn’t seem to give it much attention. 
“Is this how you wanted it, then? To be fucked so hard you’re basically just a toy?” Anakin leans down, which makes your hamstring stretch and sting as your knee is practically next to your face. The new angle with which Anakin’s cock is entering you is divine. You feel like he’s in your stomach with how deep the tip of him is hitting. 
“Mmmm,” you murmur, wrapping your arms around Anakin’s neck. You tug at his grown-out hair, bringing him down to your mouth. He still tastes a bit like his cum, along with the salty sweat that has formed over the top of his lip. You drag your hands down the expanse of his back, muscles tensing under you with each thrust. 
He’s driving into you with strong, punctuated movements. He kisses along your neck, over your racing pulse, and bites down. He hollows his cheeks to leave a mark that will remind both of you of the time you ate a fruit that made you carnal for each other. He soothes his tongue over your new bruise before leaving a butterfly kiss on your jaw. When his mouth settles over your ear, his hot breath sends a new wave of tingles down to your toes. “Feels so good, angel. Maker, your cunt is perfect. Just the tightest little hole for me to use.” 
“All yours, Ani-” your thought is cut off when Anakin’s gloved hand presses against your clit. Your back arches off of the floor and you know it’s only a matter of seconds before you finally reach your peak. Anakin knows just how to rub you so it pushes you along. Your long-awaited orgasm explodes like a firecracker. It jolts through your body, your pussy pulsates rapidly around Anakin and that sends him over the edge, too. He’s cumming for a second time and thankfully, he actually feels satiated. He just hopes you do too, because he’s exhausted and aching. 
It takes you several moments to calm down from your orgasm but the fog has finally begun to dissipate from your head. Anakin pulls his softening dick from you and collapses next to you on the floor. His chest is heaving from the exertion, which is understandable. But then he just starts laughing. 
You turn to look at him, totally puzzled. “What?” you can’t help but smile too, because his laugh is just that infectious. 
“I just can’t believe it took eating a fruit for us to finally make a move.” 
“We kind of didn’t have a choice.” 
“Yeah,” Anakin sighs. 
“Wait,” you prop your head up on your elbow. “You wanted to… you know…with me before eating the fruit?” 
Anakin mirrors you. “Well, yeah. Didn’t you?” 
You roll your eyes. “Could you be any more conceited, Anakin Skywalker?” 
“Actually, I could.” 
Yeah, he could. That was a stupid question. So your suspicions were right, after all. 
You and Anakin have always been close. A bit too close for the Council’s liking if we’re being honest. They would be lying if they said they weren’t worried about the two of you. 
It’s a good thing they will never know about the mess you two made in this Republic star ship.
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