#are we looking at the same guys? that's a praying mantis

[menlove]

being in fandom as a lesbian is so funny bc everyone else is posting hornily about your special guys and you absolutely cannot see it at all he just kind of looks like a stick bug but he's a stick bug you want to study under a magnifying glass in a little tank.

you know?

[see-arcane]

WARNING: Spoilers for The Vampyres, Dracula, and "Clarimonde" below the cut.

Also a bit of knife-twisting of the metaphorical variety. (Not that it hurts any less than steel.)

Rather than throw myself into another scribbling digression to take a break from other scribbling digressions, I���ve scratched a story itch via the sketchbook. This is the result.

I’ve gotten questions about what happens to ‘Quinn Morse’ aka a certain knife-swinging solicitor who God, the Devil, and Death itself won’t let die after the events of The Vampyres. The obvious answer is: dude’s still doing the job appointed to him by the Powers That Be. Poor guy is stuck paying a Faustian due of wiping out the predatory undead before he can ever put down the blade and hop in the grave himself.

Enter Clarimonde, from Théophile Gautier’s short story of the same name (also “La Morte Amoureuse” “The Dead Leman” “The Dead Woman in Love”) who’s still out here breaking hearts and ruining sleep schedules. The girl’s an undead party queen and a romantic hedonist, but is so terrible at the vampire part of vampirism she regularly drops dead(er) from being too hesitant about taking blood and/or conscripting. She takes barely a drop of blood when she does get to it; though that sin was enough for her own heart and physical form to get broken with betrayal. She got better—corporeally, at least—and carried on.

Until she crossed paths with Mr. Tall Dark and Sold His Soul for Love. And vice versa, our good friend the ex-Victorian psychopomp has finally run into a vampire it would be immoral to slay just for the sake of erasing another undead ‘to-do’ off the list…even if she’s temporarily the only one in the world. And therefore the only barrier between himself and finally getting to rest with his loved ones. He doesn’t even have the impetus of killing to save someone’s life as an excuse. Damn it.

I won’t say I’m not thinking about fully scribbling out the bizarre/sweet/likely doomed companionship that could exist between these two love-powered angst machines. The idea’s got teeth, pun intended. Plus there’s definitely an itch to be scratched regarding my old headcanon that Clarimonde was the Pretty Girl in Piccadilly that Mina and Dracula nearly broke their necks trying to get an eyeful of once upon a time. There’s some loaded ammo there for Clarimonde to really test her safety by mentioning, ‘Hey, your wife would have wanted it. I know, I read her mind that one time. We can break out a Ouija board and confirm.’

But I am trying to reserve the bulk of my writing juice for the current Big Project, so it’ll have to be something to poke at around the corners for now. Just wanted to share the concept with folks who might be interested.

Also, some deleted dialogue:

Clarimonde, posing in her sheerest funeral veil: “So, what are your thoughts on casual intimacy?”

Jonathan, sharpening the kukri: “I’m a big admirer of the praying mantis’ approach.”

Clarimonde: “The male’s or the female’s?”

Jonathan: “Either.”

Clarimonde: “So no romancing unless it’s to pull some psychosexual chess master mess on a villain?”

Jonathan: “Supposing the villain in question used said intimate betrayal on their own victims, yes. Also, they’d know something was wrong if I was ‘immune to their charms’ and—what’s this?”

Clarimonde, handing over several centuries’ worth of letters: “Documented evidence from members of aristocracy and clergy that I am a nefarious succubus in need of punishment for my preying on the morals and hearts of pious citizens. Look, they even included illustrations of how they’d do it.”

Jonathan: “…And were these documents attached to deliveries of jewelry or just sacks of gold?”

Clarimonde: “Both. On account of my evil coercing them into it.”

Jonathan, handing the letters back in a portfolio: “I’m afraid your villainy does not qualify for my services at this time. You’ll have to reapply with one or more proofs of murder and/or predation upon mortal innocents at a later date.”

Clarimonde:

[multi-fandom-imagine]

A/n: Yessss more Cal, I love him.

Five years….five long years since you’ve seen your favorite red headed Jedi.

You missed Cal, missed his jokes, his smile. The poncho you managed to swipe before you two went your separate ways was started to lose his scent though you couldn’t help but cringed at that thought.

“God I feel like a creep.”

Shaking your head you tugged at the poncho, your head snapping to Mirrian. You weren’t quite sure you should trust the woman’s smile. “Is something wrong?”

Shrugging her shoulders she then turned her back to you. “Cere wants to see you.”

Dropping your shoulders, you bit back a groan. “I was hoping to take a nap.”

“Trust me, you’ll want to be awake for this.”

Shaking your head you tried to wonder what the hell that meant then again you could never tell with Mirrian.

Rolling your shoulders you glanced around the room spotting Cere talking to some guy you didn’t know but your heart nearly stopped seeing who was talking to Greez.

“Cal?”

Hearing his name, Cal’s eyes went wide for a moment before he started to rush towards you and soon you were being lifted off the ground, his arms wrapped tightly around you in for a crushing embrace. “I can’t believe you’re here.” He whispered in your ear.

He was trembling as he held you, he thought he would never see you again. He did his best to look you up but you just vanished and he was to scared to ask the others.

Cal honestly thought you would hate him, maybe you did hate him. Should he even be hugging you?Wincing he then let you down as he stepped back rubbing his neck. “Sorry…..I uh got excited.”

BD-1’s beeps seeming to agree as the little robot jumped at your feet. Shaking your head you laughed for a moment stepping close. “I see you haven’t changed Cal” titling your head you then placed your hand on his cheek, him leaning into your palm.

“Well not all of you are the same, I like the beard and the hair is a nice touch.” You teased.

Letting out the breath he was holding in Cal returned your smile though it turned to confusion once it finally hit him. You were wearing his poncho, one he thought he lost. “Is that…Is that my poncho?”

Feeling warmth creep up your neck you adverted your eyes. “Maybe…it’s been helping me….I can give it-”

Shaking his head, Cal quickly grabbed hold of your hands. “You don’t…You don’t need to give it back, I want you to keep it…it looks good on you.”

It was cute, seeing the red envelope the man’s cheeks though you did see his eyes darken. You’re all to familiar with that look.

Biting your lip you took a step closer, your chest needy touching his. “Can I show you the Archives?”

“I’d like that.”

Grabbing Cal’s hand, you tugged the man towards one of the rooms ignoring Greez shouting at you both.

“Where the hell are they going?! Don’t we-.”

Mirrian hummed Placing her hand on the pilots shoulder, she gave him a smile only glancing to where you two walked off, happy to see her two close friends finally reunited again. “Let them be, they’ll be fine and they’ll be much happier when they return.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean.”

Cere sighed as het shoulder’s slumped. “I just pray they stay far away from our work.”

“Is anyone gonna clue me in on what you two are talkin-.” Seeing the look on Cere and Mirrian’s face Greez’s eyes went wide before he let out a laugh, BD-1 jumping on Mirrian’s shoulder. “Well as long as it’s ain’t the Mantis then I’m happy.”

Though it was Mirrian’s turn to let out a bark of laughter.

“Why are you laughing, why is she laughing Cere.”

Cere shrugged turning away. “I am not getting in on this, let me know when they’ve returned.”

“I just find it funny that you think they haven’t fucked on the ship.”

“Wait! What! You must be lyin! Come on Mirrian! Tell me you’re lyin? Stop walking away Mirrian.”

[colonoscopys]

yes i did mean what drink they were and i still don’t know why bc the only drink i know is a sangria. little do you know i yap enough for two friends!!! anyway new question what would everyones biggest fear be hashtga halloween

my god had a LONG drawn out conversation about this and then promptly forgot to fucking answer. forgive me forgive me forgive mee

bobby: i think (other than needles), because his son is Certified Bug Boy, bobby is a little afraid of bugs. i think buck is the little guy whos like 'bobby a PRAYING MANTIS. LOOK AT HIS LEGS' and bobby is like oh yes son... you both have the same amount of legs... lets look over there. i think he's 100% calling athena to get her gun to shoot a spider in the bathtub, clutching a towel daintily to his chest while he runs.

hen: i think its got to be like. ET. I think hen is rational at all times but one time her and chimney watch an alien movie and hen is like. what the fuck is this. and then she goes home and tells karen about it. and karen is like ms. rocket scientist like. There have been reports of the extraterrestrial. and hen just sits at the counter and waits for karen to finish cleaning the kitchen so that they can hold hands to walk up the stairs. she clings onto karen very tightly in the bed later that night like 'DONT LET THEM TAKE ME!!!!' and karen is sitting there like 'if they fucking take you theyll somehow rip out my spine the way youre fucking holding me'. denny comes in the room a little later. hen starts screaming karen says 'THAT IS OUR CHILD"

chimney: crows, obviously. but also i think its the dentist and demons. he hears a shifty noise outside and he grabs a rolling pin and stands in front of the door like 'MADDIE BABY I WILL PROTECT YOU!!!!'. maddie holding jee staring at the damn door like honey that is the mail man. please god. i also think he is 100% raising the type of kid that would go 'daddy, who's sitting in the corner of the room?" and chimney starts screaming and then maddie comes in and fist bumps jee

eddie: eddie would be vaguely uncomfortable by clowns. also with jumpscares i think he just wrinkles his noses. but i think one time him and buck go to a haunted house and theyve got one of those screens that move eerily and its like a live version of karen from spongebob and hes fucking shivering and shaking. i also think he plays up on the jumpscare thing to plaster himself to bucks biceps like a koala. he would be like "HELP ME IM SO SCARED (grabs bucks boobs) THIS IS HELPING ME!!!!!"

buck: i think he's scared of dolphins (they're Scary. and he knows so much about Them.) but also he's a huge conspiracist theories. i think he listens to a podcast and starts telling eddie about it in the drivers seat, wide eyed and blue, and he's like 'RFK JR. EVIL. EDDIE. WE NEED TO GO." and eddie just nods with his sunglasses on and says 'okay, let's go get iced coffee first'.

[malcontentmathador]

Idk if I am reading too much into it but I love how weird Agni and Vayu look, even compared to other Atma avatars. Varna, Prithivi, Dyaus look fairly close to human with extra teeth, Indra just looks cool, but I feel like Agni is fairly monstrous, and Vayu is just bizarre.

For Agni, I think what gives me that vibe is the weird hunched up posture and the double-head action. The former in particular really gives the vibe of a prowling predator, and his physical move animations have him jumping around very suddenly like he's pouncing on prey. @goatwithaplan also mentioned in a post that the 2 mouths are probably representative of how willing he is to abide by the new laws of the Junkyard; my guy needs two mouths cause he do be eating a lot. It's really cool; I think "this guy is kind of violent and means trouble" is clearly communicated through Agni's design

The clearest inhuman thing about Vayu is the insect-like elements of its design, like the elytra. The Atma avatars that are clearly animal inspired draw primarily from mammals, since we have an easier time projecting humanity onto them; Cerberus and Hayagriva, for instance. Insects, by contrast, are harder to project onto; we're used to thinking of eusocial insects which have little or no individuality to speak of. It fits well for early DDS1 Gale, who is preoccupied solely with the Embryon's success and relatively little for his comrades ("Bat would make a better ally than Cielo"). This is totally vibes based, but Vayu always makes me think of a praying mantis.

Vayu's split head and idle animations also contribute to that alien vibe. The former is, again, clearly inhuman; all the other Atma avatars have recognisable head shapes and mouths. And unlike the subdued idle animations of other demons, he does that very noticeable side-to-side jerking motion over and over again, like he can't quite find his balance, or as if his body was constantly jolted by an electric current. It's weird!!

Those things play in the general autistic pattern I've mentioned in the past for Gale. Autistic people often relate with robot characters because they struggle with social cues and emotion, and because they are othered and isolated from their peers due to their nature. Those aspects of Gale's character translate into his Atma being bizarre, inhuman, and othered even when compared to the rest of the monstrous cast

(also the side to side swaying reminds me of physical tics)

I have fewer opinions on villain atma avatars. Rahu is very weird, but Mick is not really much of a character, so I don't want to read too much into it. Ravana is also very weird, in much the same "clearly alien" way that Vayu is, but I'm not totally sure what it's meant to convey about Beck. Opinions welcome :)

[shredlad]

Chapter 2

Day was coming to an end in the land of Metkayina clan and Quaritch found it difficult to search for the survivors. It's been hours, but he was somehow hoping maybe Wainfleet could be still alive, floating somewhere in the open sea.

Luck was on his side, he's not alone. Wainfleet was holding onto ship remainings, unconscious. Quaritch descended to grab his comrade by the arms with the help of ikran and lift him off taking him to safety.

Wainfleet's head was hanging loosely as the three of them ascendend back into the dark night sky.

Colonel felt relieved for a bit now that he's got Wainfleet with him. He sighed, thinking of Spider. He was already cooking up a new plan in his soldier thick skull.

"Well, Jake is sure he won against me so they have definately returned back home by now. If I give them a visit, that feral bitch Neytiri will definately kill Spider. It'll be obvious that Spider is the one who spared my life. I must not put him in danger again." He thought to himself.

"AAGHh!" Wainfleet screamed as he woke up catching himself being carried in the air by unknown ikran rider.

He looked up and around, realizing there's not much he can do. Falling from a height like this will surely get him killed. Ikran gurguled, feeling his prey moving around.

Quaritch smiled, amused by Wainfleet's reaction. He pressed the button on communication collar as he spoke: "Relax. Papa Dragon speaking."

Wainfleet looked up and stayed quiet for a second, twitching his ears up front, as if relieved to hear its Quaritch and not some savage Na'vi. He tried to reach up for his collar but unable because this big bird had his arms locked, claws cutting into his flesh as he wiggeled more.

"Well you could've released the grip a little!" He yelled, irriteted and in pain. Luckily, the land was near. The three of them landed on a spot hidden by the rocks. Ikran released Wainfleet and he fell down on the sand. Wainfleet grunted.

"Be lucky its just sand." Quaritch responded, stepping down from an animal's back. "We gotta move. Hurry. We might need to settle around here."

Colonel stepped into the woods while trying to contact the rest of RDA military. Finally, Ardmore responded. He gave her exact location, they are on their way.

"Looks like 'Eywa' is on our side after all." Quaritch said sarcastically while looking into the distace. Wainfleet approached him after wiping all the sand from his clothes and face. Quaritch glanced at him and proceeded to smacked him on the back, letting out a satisfied chuckle.

Soon, the RDA was there to pick them up. As they entered, medics hurried to support them, inspecting them of any severe injuries. Swinging with stethoscopes and antitoxin injections in case one of them got hit by a poisonous Na'vi arrow.

Quaritch's ears went back as he became more irritated with all these little humans running around him, inspecting him.

"We're alright. No need to make a deal out of it." He pushed the humans aside to walk up front to Ardmore that was waiting patiently. She raised the palm of her hand to the forehead saluting.

"Colonel, thought we lost you, again." A smirk escaped her mouth making her sound ironic. Quaritch shot her with a piercing gaze, letting her know he's serious.

"That Jake Sully bastard escaped. I'll need another recom team." The blue man inhaled, pinching the root of his nose. He hissed as the wound in his arm opened again.

A medic hurried with a bandages to help Colonel. "Uh, sir. Please, kneel so that I can apply the bandage." The guy smiled weakly while looking up, afraid of a blue man standing tall double his height.

Colonel shifted his gaze at the medic standing left off him. Obeying him, he knelt down. The wound started dripping again, it needed a bandage this time.

Ardmore was afraid of no man, whether blue or any other color. Standing tall and mighty, appearing to be nearly the same height as the avatar. Like a praying mantis deceiving an enemy.

"Unfortunately, we have no more recoms left. Growing them is expensive. It would mean wasting all the money we have earned killing tulkuns and digging up unobtanium. We need something profitable." Ardmore exclaimed fixing her hat looking down.

"And that is?" Colonel leaned his head and frowned, expecting some valid solution. "Well, I thought you were the visionary guy." She looked up again, crossing her arms.

Quaritch made a disappointing expression. "And I thought you were the general." he brushed off. There was Wainfleet approaching. All bandaged up, he suffered more injuries than Quaritch after all.

"Colonel, what's the plan?" Lyle said enthusiastically. Medic had just finished bandaging colonel's arm so he stood up facing Wainfleet.

"The plan is, there is no plan." He smiled at Lyle stretching his shoulders and ready for more.

[ravenya003]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Teacher's Pet, S01E04

It’s our first Xander-centric episode and... it’s not great.

The episode starts off with what is clearly Xander’s daydream, evidenced by the fact that Buffy is suddenly helpless in the face of an aggressive vampire. Xander saves her and then leaps up on the stage to finish his guitar solo. I guess the nicest thing I can say is... it could have been worse?

Back in reality, the Scoobies are in biology class and Dr Gregory (who we glimpsed briefly in the previous episode) targets Buffy for an on-the-spot question about how ants communicate. Willow does her best to give her the answer from behind his back, but Buffy has a ditzy moment and says “B.O.” instead of “smell.” C’mon Buffy, that was an easy one!

The writers have an extremely limited window of opportunity to make us feel sad about Dr Gregory’s imminent death, and for my money, do a pretty good job when he approaches Buffy after class and gives her unexpected words of encouragement instead of the expected scolding. It culminates with him saying: “let’s make them eat that permanent record.” Aww.

So when he inevitably gets dragged off by a giant tentacle two seconds later, it’s a bummer.

The whole thing also sets up the moral of the episode: do your homework. This is quickly followed by its central theme: the sexual prowess of teenage boys (or rather, their anxiety over the lack of it). Xander is at the Bronze, trying and failing to look cool, and overhearing fellow student Blayne bragging about his conquests in such a way that makes it clear he’s never had any.

(Most of the season one episodes are heavy-handed metaphors for teenage dramas, but this one’s even heavier than usual).

Xander’s masculinity is in trouble, so he takes advantage of Buffy and Willow’s arrival to put his arms around them – Willow is all for this, but Buffy is distracted by the arrival of Angel.

And hey! This is the first time Xander and Willow see him! I’d forgotten all about this scene. There’s no interaction between them so far, but Xander definitely clocks him as a handsome threat, especially when he gives his jacket to Buffy on noticing that she’s cold.

Though that might just be a ploy to get her to notice the wound on his arm, and he warns her about a vampire she nicknames “Fork Guy.”

The following day, a new teacher arrives to take Dr Gregory’s place. As befits her attractiveness, she walks up in slow motion while sexy music plays, and both Xander and Blayne are rendered helpless.

This episode very much frames Blayne as a male Cordelia (jock instead of a cheerleader, but with the same undercutting, dismissive attitude toward the Scoobies) and specifically a foil to Xander as Cordelia is to Buffy. It’s a shame we don’t see him again after this, though I like to imagine he made it to Graduation Day and fought in the battle there.

Natalie French is played by the very beautiful Musetta Vander, and glancing over her IMDB she’s still working – though during the late nineties/early noughties she was in a lot of genre stuff: Xena Warrior Princess, Babylon 5, Highlander, Star Trek, Star Gate...

Her first lesson to the class is some straight-up exposition about how the praying mantis lays eggs (way to give your secret away!) though I find it interesting that she argues the insect (and by extension, her) is not evil – just acting according to nature’s design. As far as I recall, this particular Monster of the Week isn’t technically a demon... just a big bug.

In the cafeteria, the Scoobies are handed lunch trays by someone off-screen – I only mention this because... do you think this is the lunch-lady who goes nuts in “Earshot” and tries to poison everyone?

Cordelia marches into the kitchen to make a special dietary lunch for herself and opens the fridge to reveal Dr Gregory’s headless corpse. Charisma Carpenter does a good job with Cordelia’s hysteria in this moment, though I have to wonder why the She-Mantis kept Gregory’s body on-campus. It doesn’t fit the MO of her other three victims, who she lures to the privacy of her house. And wouldn't she want to lay her eggs in a safe place?

I suppose she simply doesn’t think anyone would believe a giant insect is on the loose and that she’s entirely above suspicion (which I suppose would also explain her casualness in giving the class a lecture on praying mantises).

Regrouping in the library, the Scoobies discuss the murder. Buffy has tears on her cheeks and Giles says that he liked Dr Gregory too. Aww. Also, it intrigues me that Giles probably does have to interact with the Sunnydale High facility on a regular basis – little chats in the staffroom and so on. That’s a glimpse of his life (and his relationships with other adults) that we never get to see.

Detective Buffy points out Gregory was wearing the same clothes – specifically his lab coat – from the last time she saw him, which suggests he was killed at school. Skipping ahead, she's also observant enough to notice that Miss French was carrying groceries when she sees her outside Weatherly Park, suggesting that she lives nearby.

The gang floats the possibility that this death has something to do with the enigmatic warning Angel delivered about “Fork Guy” the other night – are they connected? (They’re not, but I like it when characters are wrong about things in logical ways).

Giles has heard of a vampire such as the one Angel described, stating that he works for the Master and cut off his hand in penance for displeasing him. The gang are smart enough to realize that what happened to Gregory doesn’t really fit this MO... so could it be there are two monsters out there? (Yes).

Their only lead is that a drunk was killed the other night in Weatherly Park, so naturally Buffy goes to investigate despite Giles ordering her not to. Which is a little weird come to think of it. Isn’t it her job to investigate these types of things? But still very telling that she went of her own accord.

She bumps into a drunk who tells her to go home (it’s kind of unclear, but I think this is actually an undercover cop) who is swiftly followed by a pretty big vampire with a claw in place of a hand. Buffy tussles with him for a bit, only for him to scarper when – holy shit, the police arrive! This is one of... I dunno, four times the police force appear in the entire series?

It makes sense the writers chose to keep them on the periphery (I have an explanation for this, but it’ll keep) so it always comes as a shock whenever you see them actually doing their job.

The Claw makes a run for it with Buffy in pursuit, only for her to witness a strange scene: the vampire is spooked by a woman walking home with her groceries, and when she turns around – it’s Miss French.

Giles is cross that Buffy disobeyed him, then interested when she tells the story of a big scary vampire being driven off by the mere presence of a substitute biology teacher. I love that Giles immediately believes her story without question (Merlin still leaves its scars) and promises to research more.

We get something of a filler scene, in which Principal Flutie waylays Buffy on her way to class and forcibly escorts her to the crisis councillor’s office. Cordelia is already inside, getting her second scene of the episode in which she tries to argue that at least Dr Gregory’s death has been good for her diet. Buffy’s face is priceless:

Late to class, Buffy looks through the window in the door and sees Miss French perform a “full Exorcist twist” of her head in order to look behind her. Willow is computer hacking and informs them that Blayne has been missing since the previous night. Did his parents call the cops? Probably not, since parents – like the police – barely exist in this show.

We get a real clunker of a line in which Willow asks Buffy: “what are you going to do?” and she dramatically announces: “my homework.” Look, it’s early days. Moral anvils are going to be dropped.

Conveniently, Xander is not here to share in all this important research and moralizing about how homework helps you learn stuff, and accepts Miss French’s invitation to her house that night.

We get another kinda-filler scene in which Miss French prepares a sandwich full of bugs for herself, and it’s worth noting because it’s very cute the way the close-up on her hands demonstrates that the actress hated touching those bugs. She does it so quickly and yet so carefully, with as little physical contact as possible.

Buffy has done her homework and reached her conclusion: Miss French is a praying mantis. All the evidence puts to it – the headless corpse, the rotating head, the fear she instilled in the Claw... and of course, her fashion sense.

Her conclusion inspires Giles to make a call to a contact called Carlyle Ferris who specialized in fairy tales and bugs (before he went mad) while Buffy rushes to warn Xander.

It does not go well. Granted, her insistence that a woman he’s being somewhat chemically induced by is actually “a big old bug” isn’t the most convincing argument in the world, but it soon veers into Xander’s personal insecurity and jealousy when he brings up Angel. Dude. Come on.

I obviously don’t have a problem with characters having flaws (the showrunners of the live-action Avatar the Last Airbender have recently stated they’re toning down Sokka’s chauvinism, which is eye-rolling since one of the central tenants of that character is he grows OUT of it) but in this case it’s difficult to separate “accurate depiction of teenage boy” from “still not cool behaviour though” from “how cognizant is Joss Whedon to the fact that this level of entitlement IS bad behaviour?” from “he nearly gets eaten a few scenes later, so clearly we’re meant to be on Buffy’s side here.”

It's an entanglement of authorial intent and dated nineties concepts and Watsonian/Doylist interpretations of the material – so let’s just go with: Xander is wrong to let his insecurities about women guide his behaviour in this instance, and his arc will eventually culminate in a really lovely scene with Dawn in season seven in which he admits that being the one without superpowers is tough but he sticks around anyway because he loves his friends.

This scene is his first step on the way to that self-actualization.

Xander reaches Natalie French’s house, who opens the door in a suggestive dress and offers him a martini. It does not cross his mind that there’s anything wrong with this, though he starts to get a clue when he overhears Blayne yelling for help from the basement.

Giles is having a hilarious one-sided conversation with Carlyle Ferris on the phone, assuring him that he was right about everything “except for your mother coming back as a Pekinese.” It’s a tragedy that we never meet this character in-person.

In any case, Giles fills them in: that there is precedence to the existence of a giant She-Mantis, who he explicitly compares to creatures like the Greek sirens and the Celtic sea-maidens – I like it when the wider reaches of human mythologies are integrated into the world-building. (Also, maybe this was the show’s nod to the succubus, a creature mentioned in the pilot episode and then never actually seen in the show itself).

Buffy orders some recordings of bat sonar from the “video library” (that was a thing that existed in the nineties) and they all head for Natalie French’s house. Turns out that the inhabitant is a little old lady and retired teacher in her nineties whose identity the She-Mantis has stolen.

She’s a very funny character, who takes the opportunity to overshare details of her life with the three complete strangers on her doorstep – though I like the implication that some residents of Sunnydale manage to have a perfectly nice little life while living atop the Hellmouth. This Miss French has probably had a few brushes with the weird and supernatural during her time, but clearly made it to retirement age intact.

In another of this episode’s most grating scenes, Willow suggests they start knocking on doors, only for Buffy to insist that they don’t have time. But what they DO have time for is Buffy to leap into the sewers, find the Claw, and walk him like a dog around the neighbourhood until he reacts badly to one of the houses, thereby demonstrating that the She-Mantis is inside. Suuuure.

(I’m guessing that this early on, and after the vampire-free episode “Witch”, the writers’ room decided they just really needed to shoehorn a vampire into the mix somehow).

Xander wakes up in a cage in the She-Mantis’s cellar, only to find a panic-stricken Blayne jabbering about what the creature is about to do to them. It involves eggs, “throbbing,” rape and beheading.

However, in a classic Xander move, he’s managed to force out one of the bars in the cage and plays along with the She-Mantis beckoning to him... before whacking her with his makeshift weapon and making a run for it. He doesn’t get far, and the worst is about to happen when Buffy bursts through the window.

She starts with insect spray and then the recording of the bat sonar. In another clunker, she feels the need to spell it out: “Bat sonar makes your whole nervous system go to hell.” Yes, I’m sure that the She-Mantis writhing in pain is AWARE of this fact, Buffy.

The monster is finished off with a machete, and the boys are saved. In a nice moment, Blayne genuinely thanks Buffy for the save, and then disappears into the darkness of one-shot characters.

Motor-mouth Willow feels the need to point out that the She-Mantis only targeted virgins, and I get the feeling this isn’t an innocent slip of the tongue, but something that Willow wanted to make sure that Buffy knew. She can be a sly one, sometimes.

With Buffy’s machete, Xander takes out the rest of the Mantis eggs.

Much like Cordelia, Angel only gets two scenes this episode, but Buffy confirms the death of the Claw (she staked him with a picket fence) and gives a quiet “oh boy” as he walks away. Yeah, she’s in trouble.

The following day, we meet Dr Gregory’s less-inspiring replacement, but Buffy gets a nice little moment to honour the teacher who believed in her (and whose “do your homework” reminder saved the day) by gently putting his glasses back in his lab coat hanging in the cupboard.

We then pan down to a remaining clutch of eggs concealed at the back of the cupboard – one of which is already hatching. But don’t worry, we never see or hear about this ever again. For such a continuity-heavy show, it’s a bit weird.

This episode stands out because the monster is so different from practically every other villain in the show’s seven-year run. The She-Mantis has more in common with the more sci-fi tinged elements of the show (the internet demon, the resurrected Frankenstein-like jock, the fish boys, the various evil robots) than the old school vampires, demons, witches and werewolves, but it still feels more like something out of a cheesy black-and-white serial called “Attack of the Giant Insects” or something. Nothing like the She-Mantis ever comes up again – something that’s not demonic in nature, nor attracted to the magic of the Hellmouth, but just a creature acting according to its own nature.

It's not unwatchable, but it’s safe to say that this episode is the weakest of season one – and for that reason, not one that gets referenced very often (if at all) in future episodes.

Miscellaneous Observation:

The lore surrounding the She-Mantis suggests that Dr Gregory... was also a virgin? I mean, it’s not out of the question, especially if he was asexual or something. But there was an easy alternative to this odd implication, and that’s having the She-Mantis kill him in order to take his place as a substitute teacher (which she needed to get into closer proximity with the actual virgins).

That said, this would have denied Buffy some of the necessary clues she needed to identify Miss French for who she really was (namely, the lack of a head on Dr Gregory’s corpse).

So, did everyone learn that the moral of this story was to do your homework? It was pretty vague, I’m not sure they mentioned it enough times.

The episode does much better with the metaphor of predatory adults around minors, and the show was rather ahead of its time in demonstrating that a woman making sexual advances on teenage boys is just as dodgy as visa-versa.

Xander’s middle name is established as Lavelle, something that I’m pretty sure is never mentioned again.

Giles mentioned that the Claw cut off his own hand after displeasing the Master – I kind of want to know the story behind that. Of course, knowing the Master, it was probably something frivolous. He talked out of turn or something.

Giles calls what Buffy did at Weatherly Park “hunting” instead of “patrolling.” Heh. 

For a guy constantly worrying about his masculinity, Xander is man enough to tell Buffy to her face that she was right and he was wrong. Too many dudes don’t realize that this sort of thing is what REALLY makes you a man.

The writers clearly still haven’t figured out Angel’s deal, and so play it safe by having him appear, spout some cryptic warnings, and then disappear again. The chemistry between him and Buffy is stirring up though...

Best Line: Buffy: “She could be anywhere!” Miss French: “No dear, I’m right here.” I don’t know why it’s funny, but it is.

Best Subversion: Dr Gregory is nice and supportive, instead of a big meanie. Then he dies.

Minor Character I’d Most Like to See In-Person: Carlyle Ferris. He sounded hilarious!

Death Toll: Dr Gregory. The drunk at Weatherly Park. One off-screen individual that Blayne saw getting killed by the She-Mantis, so I won’t count it. The Claw. The She-Mantis.

Grand Total: Six civilians, seven villains.

[mitamicah]

Looked at more (almost all of them) of your ocs, so cute. They are adorable.

So cool, love the horns/antlers? And colourful hair, sea horses are cool.

This lil one is adorable, and very fascinating :3 love the hair, look like bunny ears which is so awwwwwwww.

Now my favourite quill, I love him so much, so freaking sweet and cute, chimeras are so cool and I have to know a few things.

1. does he like dressing up?

2. if he does what about dog costumes?

3. is it offensive that I want to put him into several dog outfits since he’s a chimera?

4. here are a few suggestions if it is not offensive :3

(Yes I know the shark one is a cat😺 but the ones with a dog didn’t looked as sweet 😭)

And can we get more quill facts? :3👀👀👀👀👀👀

Like are there more? He’s the adopted son of phoenix, is there a reason? Tragic backstory or just sweet like sugar?

Thanks for listening. And I hope this wasn’t too much :3

Why, thank you Jay ^V^ glad to see my babies getting some love :3

The rest of the reply will be under the line :3

Ah, that's Skari ^V^ he's pretty cool :3 it is indeed horns like those on a seahorse ... just a lot bigger x'D

Aww, you found little Val :3 I believe he is my newest closed species character (an original species created by another online creator that has given me permission to make a character in this species ^V^) I had a fun time designing him for sure :D bunny ears and all :3

Heck yeah, more love for Quill :D!! He is not usually one who gets a lot of attention so I am glad to see he caught your eye ^V^

Why then ask away :3

Quill haven't done a lot of dress up but like most else in live he is very happy and eager to try :3

Same as before - he is a happy boy who'd be open to try anything else dog costumes

I don't think so?

Oh these are cute :3 although I hope that Phoenix are allowed to make little adjustments for their friend since otherwise I fear Quill's secondary set of arms would feel very cramped in these :'D

Is there anything specific you'd like to know ^V^?

Depending on how much you've read already these might already be something you know :'D

Quill is part fruitbat, part deer, part dog, part praying mantis, part bird (could be a parrot given his ability to learn words) and possibly part snake.

Quill hasn't learned to speak in full sentences so he communicates with single words like "hi", "road" (his way of asking to go for a walk), and "bed" (his way of saying goodnight).

Quill has learned to weave with his secondary pair of arms (I call them his mantis arms).

Quill learns new words through echolalia which in short is that he echoes a word you say to him in the same tonality back at you (it is often seen with autistic people).

While Quill can speak a few words his vocal chords are actually better suited for high pitched bird like sounds so he is often found echoing bird twitter/song.

(if you want more and/or more deep cut facts than this let me know :'D

Oh no his story isn't that tragic :'D Quill was bred in captivity to be a housepet. Phoenix found Quill at a parisian adoption center where the little guy had been given up since nobody had wanted to adopt him from the breeder. Phoenix themselves being a chimera chose to adopt Quill as a sort of son. Quill is often seen helping Phoenix carry around their arrows (Phoenix are an archer amongst other things) - actually this is how Quill got his name. :3

Thank you for the questions ^V^ I hope you can use my answers :3

[cassowary-rapture]

Day 1

T and I decided to go out for dinner at one of two restaurants in his tiny town and within 30 seconds of me starting my car I had gotten it stuck in a ditch with the rear passenger side tire hanging in the air. T had to tow it out with his truck and the little girl across the street came outside to film it lol

To be fair he was staring at me while wearing a werewolf mask but to be more fair almost this exact same thing happened before, except worse and when I was alone in the car -- I tried to back out of a driveway and got stuck on a retaining wall

Had grilled cheese sandwiches and chocolate shakes and then went for a night hike, with lots of big frogs and arrowhead spiders/triangle orbweavers (Verrucosa arenata) with big webs across the trail

Day 2

BUGFEST!!! It's gotten a bit repetitive since they have basically the same tables/exhibits every year but I actually went to one of the presentations this time -- one on spider venom -- and think I'll try to attend more next year. But the main thing is that it's just wonderful being surrounded by bugs and people who are excited about bugs, some of whom were also dressed as bugs, including a spider with entombed prey and a praying mantis.

Also saw the guy who was wearing a full-body moth costume two years ago and showed us some other awesome buggy sewing projects

Wandered around for like three hours, got some cool free pins, had a picnic with R on the art museum grounds, and then headed back to T's place

Day 3

Hung out with T. We went to the Old Carbonton Dam, hiked/climbed stuff at my favorite hiking spot on the Haw River (lots of wolf spiders, baby toads, and freshwater snails!), got Greek food, hung out at Bynum Bridge, and went to a guerrilla screening of Nostalgia for the Light, which was very good and chilling, at a park in Durham. On the walk to the park there was a bench that was also a mailbox!! Had a long and sleepy but fun drive back to T's with Joep Beving and many toad puns

Staying in the RV was fun and I miss my table bed but do not miss the very tiny bathroom or drinking what I am pretty sure was hose water

I really miss that area. You know when you go to the mountains and look out at the landscape and it's just kind of breathtaking? I feel the same way about the Triangle area now. I'm used to living someplace flat and overdeveloped and it's so green and hilly there. There are SO MANY TREES

I could go on but yeah yeah I like it there

Non-death related post-trip thoughts: I should maybe try to make friends here? Try another app maybe and open it up to men? I can tell them to fuck off if they don't read the "sexual orientation" bit and hit on me. I could probably make one friend. Anyway T asked if I'd made any friends here and I told him about cute vape shop guy and feeding the turtles shredded carrots. So I have done business with cute living things. Which is something! But that does not actually count and I can probably do a bit better

[tombeane-blog]

THE BATTLE OF THE SEXES IS OVER!

(March 2023)

Men Won!

That's right, males of my specimen have won the battle of the sexes.  It's over.  Put a pin in it.  We guys won, you gals lost.  

(Full Disclosure: Although I was born biologically male at a very early age, it is only recently that I made it legally binding in the United States by openly declaring that from this place and time I hereby identify exclusively as male.  You may continue to call me - he/him, Mr. Majestic, that hunk over there, frijoles, sir, seer or sensei - just as you always have.)

For untold millennia, possibly even billennia, nature has endowed us guys with more power and strength than you gals, which allowed us to rule unchallenged throughout the natural world.  Well, all except for being eaten by that evil female Praying Mantis.

Take the mighty male lion.  Lord of the jungle and master of all he surveys.  He sits back, concentrating on diddley squat while the gal lions do absolutely everything - hunting, having babies, nursing and raising more lions - the whole megillah.  When a pack of female lions brings down a water buffalo, the male stretches, yawns, slowly saunters over, shakes his magnificent mane and roars, "Get The F Back Ladies!".  Then proceeds to dine alone.  Only after satisfying his hunger do the females get to eat the scraps.  This natural and equitable distribution of effort and reward has always worked flawlessly.  

There was only one small problem i.e., when the male lion lost his female pride to another male lion.

But forget that.  

Over hundreds of thousands of years the lion learned to walk on his hind legs and slowly evolved into us guys. To this day we still retain our advantage in strength and power - guaranteeing that our well deserved lordly privileges stay in place.

In fact, there are only two significant differences between us modern guys and today's un-evolved lions.

One:

Today's King Of The Jungle never learned to ferment beer.  A serious oversight on his part.

Two: *(This is Rated R. You must be 18 or older to read this next salacious bit of science. No cheating kids.  Skip over it.)

Let's compare a male lion lounging on the Serengeti surveying the passing herds with today's male-male guy lounging on the beach with a beer in his hand.  Although they both will have the same exact thought, i.e., "Wowza! look at the gorgeous haunch on that sweet looking young hottie over there.  I'd love to take a bite of that!"... 

...only the lion means this literally - I'm pretty sure. 

(Rated R section ends.  Under 18 can resume reading.)

All throughout hysterical time this precarious balance of nature has existed.  Only in the last coupla' hundred years have you gals decided to upset all this.   Your birthing and your rules about marriage before(you know) and your cooking all our food and washing our clothes and your bikinis and your common sense and all those other feminine supremacies just weren't good enough for you were they?  

Nope.  First it was voting, then owning things, wearing pants, driving cars and even forming a female rock band.  Talk about a slippery slope... 

And then in the 60's you must have thought you were all but victorious when you threw off the last of society's cultural mores and brazenly assumed histrionic male privileges.  

You fell right into our trap.

We fought.  We clawed.  We scratched back.  We reclaimed our territory inch by inch.  

You want proof?  Go to the the finest restaurants.  All the great chefs are men.  Who's designing all of Hillary's pantsuits and bikinis?  Armeni, Klein, Lauren, Dior.  What about shoes?  Jimmy Choo.  Who developed Mustang Sally's 1965 baby blue convertible you gals seduced us into buying for you?  Lee Iacocca.

And now.  The final hill has been conquered.

Men are better at literally, as well as figuratively, everything.  Men are setting new records in women's swimming, women's running and women's weightlifting.  How long do you think you can keep us out of female mud wrestling? 

The writing is on the wall gals.  Modern high school guys who can't get a partial baseball scholarship to the all male, College of Winnebago Repair in Bugscuffle, Tennessee will jigger their gender and become PAC 12 Player Of The Year on the Stanford softball team.

(OK Vern, I'll admit I have to give up watching women's gymnastics and figure skating but that is a small price to pay.)

You gals may fight back and enact legislation mandating some sort of Made In America type label.  Like defining a maximum percentage of X and Y Chromosomals we are allowed to field in order to retain the designation of a 'Women's Team'. 

But.... it is a losing battle and you know it. 

Congress, the President and even the Supreme Court can no longer even define what a women is. (Unless it depends on what the meaning of the word is, is.)

According to our government, universities, schools, movies and mainstream news, males can now do everything a female can do - menstruate, give birth, nurse, have sympathy for others, ask for directions when lost, flirtatiously evade speeding tickets - you name it.  

You want more proof that the XY chromosome now dominates what used to be for XXs only? 

"Makeup companies, feminine hygiene companies, and clothing companies have all concluded that men are better than women at selling their products."

"Dylan Mulvaney, transgender influencer, is the big winner in all this, thanks in part to his being Joe Biden’s favorite girl."

Drew Barrymore kneels before the better woman.

The Battle Is Over.  

Men are now better women than women.

[honeyspiders10]

could you do a tamaki amajiki x male reader fic? :DD i love him sm

Of course! I haven't written for tamaki yet, so I'm super excited!! I didn't get a prompt or any specifics, so I'm just going to do basic headcanons!

P.S. I'm so sorry this took so long to get out!! I've been busy with schoolwork and working on other things and stuff, and with Thanksgiving coming up, I've been trying to make myself look presentable to people by using skin care! And I just started streaming on Twitch! So I've been dealing with technical shit and stuff. (Alot harder than it seems, btw) anyway enough about my problems and excuses that's get started!!!

-------------------------------------------------------

Request: Yes!

Genre: Fluff!

Fandom: BNHA or MHA

Pronouns used: none used, but used the word 'boy' when referring to reader. Male reader is strongly implied.

Pairing: Tamaki Amajiki x Male reader!

Style: Headcanons

Proofread: yes

-------------------------------------------------------

Tamaki is a very shy person. We know this. We've seen how he acts in public. He hides behind Mirio and asks Mirio to do all the talking and stuff. He's the same way with you.

He obviously is a cuddlebug. He's just too shy to admit it. He will start getting more comfortable the further into the relationship you get.

He gets nervous when out in public with you. Not that he's ashamed of liking boys. He's just afraid about the stares when you guys hold hands or when you give him a peck on the cheek all the :O faces he gets. He will put his head on your shoulder and just lay there until you reach where you're going. But he loves you and doesn't want to be with anyone else, but he could definitely go without all the stares.

If you find out what's making Tamaki so nervous, you will throw hands. Like things along the lines of: "What are you staring at? Have you never seen 2 boys love each other? We're not circus animals. Look the other way, Karen." He'll be thankful but with also be petrified.

Not that this has any backup, but I feel like he's extremely artistic. He loves to paint, specifically, oil painting. It is one of the hardest media's to use, and he is AMAZING at it. He loves getting praise for the paintings he...paints. and of course, when he shows you, you give so much love and praise, and for what he's created, he gets a little overwhelmed, and then you have to calm him down while mildly panicking.

Tamaki has some sensory issues. He doesn't like loud noises, which is the one that you can see in the show. Doesn't like fireworks or loud music or anything. So, there are no parties for Amajiki.

This boy loves taking baths, and I mean LOVES. Bath bombs are probably his favorite thing ever. His favorites are soft purple ones and the ones that smell like caramel and vanilla.

With the HC above this one, his favorite place to go is bath and body works or the candle section in Walmart. He definitely had like 50 candles. His dorm must smell amazing.

Tamaki has a fear of insects, but he loves butterflies and bees. My guy hates centipedes (same bro) and crickets. Or practically anything that jumps. Will runaway screaming if he sees a praying mantis. NEVER let this man around a spider he won't even be able to run away he'll pass the fuck out.

His favorite time of day is dusk and nighttime. He loves watching the sunset and mapping constellations he's great at astronomy. Bonus points if you're there. ^^

-------------------------------------------------------

Alright, sorry it's kinda short!! I hope you like it though! I love Tamaki and can't wait to write for him again! Toodles!!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 322: IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME

Previously on BnHA: Endeavor was all, “Kirishima please take Hagakure and Aoyama and put them away somewhere out of sight until we’re finally ready for the U.A. Traitor Plot.” Shouto was all “HEY DEKU DID IT EVER OCCUR TO YOU THAT MAYBE YOU WANDERING THE STREETS LOOKING LIKE A GOTH PRAYING MANTIS IS EXACTLY WHAT AFO WANTS.” Deku was all “I’M SORRY I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY CRUSHING MARTYR COMPLEX AND ACCUMULATED TRAUMA.” Mineta was all “HEY DEKU YOU SWEET THANG, IF I COULD REARRANGE THE ALPHABET I’D PUT ‘U’ AND ‘I’ TOGETHER, ANYWAYS HMU 💖”, or at least that’s what fandom apparently thought he said. Everyone was all “WELL SINCE WE’RE BACK HERE IN KAMINO WE SHOULD DO THE THING” and did the whole “launching someone into the air to save someone by dramatically grabbing their hand” thing that everybody fucking loves to do in Kamino so damn much. Iida was all “[bombards me and Deku with feels].” Deku was all, “ू(ʚ̴̶̷́ .̠ ʚ̴̶̷̥̀ ू).” I was all, “(;*△*;).” Horikoshi was all, “my work here is done.”

Today on BnHA: 

oh my god.

so I finally went back to look at what I wrote up for 321 last week, and it’s a hot fucking mess lol, and I really don’t want to deal with that right now, so we’re just gonna skip it and go back sometime in the next few days or something because I really want to read the new chapter and I have no self control. I’M SORRY IIDA

oh my god he’s breaking out the narration word bubbles oh my god. shit is about to get epic isn’t it

has there ever been a chapter that opened with these that WASN’T epic? serious question. anyways all aboard the Feels Express I guess

YEP

I saved a bunch of other crying kaomojis when I was looking for ones to use in the “previously on” summary, and right now it’s looking like that was a good fucking decision you guys. if I’m going to be an emotional wreck I might as well do it in style ʕ ಡ ﹏ ಡ ʔ

AND BY THE WAY!!

SHOULD I JUST THANK HORIKOSHI NOW AND SAVE MYSELF SOME TIME LATER. THE MAN ALWAYS FUCKING DELIVERS WHAT ELSE CAN I FUCKING SAY GODDAMN. IS IT TOO EARLY TO DECLARE THIS MY NEW FAVORITE CHAPTER? I SHOULD PROBABLY READ FURTHER THAN ONE PAGE BUT I’VE JUST GOT A FEELING

(ETA: it’s like. maybe my second favorite lol. A HUG WOULD HAVE PUT IT IN FIRST, I’M JUST SAYING.)

anyway so Ochako is releasing Iida, which is actually hilarious, because idk if you all know this but Iida can’t fucking fly you guys

like, I assume Ochako released him because she already knew that Kirishima was in place to catch him, but I really love this split-second of panic on Iida’s part where he’s all “HMM, IS OCHAKO TRYING TO KILL ME, ACTUALLY”

LOL THERE’S A THOOM AND EVERYTHING

that’s some plus fucking ultra on Ochako’s part right there. “IF THEY DIE THEY DIE” goddamn girl did you leave your chill in the same locker as Momo or what

now poor Kiri is all “DAMMIT DEKU ARE YOU PASSED OUT OR WHAT, I DIDN’T GET TO TELL YOU MY THING GODDAMMIT”

oh my gosh he is curled up so small you guys oh my fucking lord

RESIDUAL “LOST CHILD” FEELS FROM LAST WEEK COMING IN FOR A LANDING!! PLEASE MAKE SURE YOUR SEATBACKS AND TRAY TABLES ARE IN THEIR UPRIGHT POSITIONS OMG ( ˚͈͈͈͈̥̆ ₍₎ ˚͈͈͈͈̥̆ )

LMAO IIDA IS TRYING TO CONFIRM THAT OCHAKO PLANNED FOR KIRISHIMA TO CATCH HIM, AND KIRISHIMA IS ALL “NOPE I’M JUST HERE BY CHANCE BRO”

Ochako is the U.A. Traitor confirmed. Hagakure I am so sorry I doubted you. Ochako get over here. so are you Toga now or what

anyway so now everyone is running over before Iida can react to this casual announcement of his attempted murder. and now Mina is taking her turn, and Horikoshi is all “HEY BTW IS MINA CRYING ON THE LIST OF THINGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY?” and of fucking course it is, you bastard. I’m not made of stone

( ɵ̥̥ ˑ̫ ɵ̥̥)

SLDKFJLSDKJ:LKWEJ

IS THIS THE PART WHERE I JUST START SCREAMING INCOHERENTLY FOR THE REST OF THE CHAPTER LOL. SURE FEELS LIKE WE ARE GETTING TO THAT TIME

OH MY GOD KACCHAN AHHHHH

I CAN’T OMG LOL I ALREADY GLANCED AT THE NEXT COUPLE OF PANELS, AND HE’S STARTING A WHOLEASS MONOLOGUE ABOUT ALL OF HIS DEKU FEELS AND OH MY GOD

“HERE YOU GO MAKESTE, A WHOLE CHAPTER OF ALL YOUR FAVORITE META TOPICS JUST THE WAY YOU LIKE THEM” THANK YOU HORIKOSHI YOU’RE A BRO (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ

SLKASODIFALWKFLKJ

THEY’RE JUST DEKU AND KACCHAN. holy shit you guys. because oh my god, but it’s like when Deku was talking to the Vestiges about saving Tomura, and he turned into his little child self because his heart and intentions were so pure?? and it’s like that again, except that we’re seeing them as their child selves because that’s who they are to each other?? like, not that they actually see each other as children, but just, they can see past all of the stuff on the outside and see each other to their cores, to who they are inside, and when they look at each other they each simply see the other boy that they’ve known their whole entire life. idk?? does that make sense??? DOES ANY OF THIS EVEN MAKE SENSE I DON’T KNOW WHAT WORDS ARE ANYMORE I’M JUST SWIMMING IN FEELS OKAY. I’M TRYING HERE

they’re just boys, is what I’m trying to say, I guess. just Deku and Kacchan. all the walls are down, all the gaps are bridged, and all it is is the one boy reaching out and connecting with the other, and just,,, (꒦ິ⌓꒦ີ)

OH MY GOD [GRABBING YOUR SHOULDERS AND POINTING WORDLESSLY] !!!1LK1

DO YOU ALL KNOW WHAT THIS IS YOU GUYS

HOW PERFECTLY FUCKING RAD. WELL LET ME JUST ENJOY THESE LAST FEW SECONDS BEFORE MY LIFE IS FOREVER CHANGED, I GUESS

OH

MY

GOD

CAN HE EVEN SAY THAT??? IS THAT EVEN LEGAL??? IS HE EVEN FUCKING ALLOWED TO SAY THAT. WHAT IS HAPPENING

OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

─=≡Σ((( つ ◕o◕ )つ

GET IN HERE, EVERYONE!!

Y’ALL HE REALLY DID IT. “BAKUGOU IS SUCH AN ASSHOLE HE HASN’T EVEN APOLOGIZED” WELL GUESS FUCKING WHAT. GUESS FUCKING WHAT, YOU GUYS!! LET’S FUCKING GOOOOO ((((／￣∇￣)／＼(￣∇￣＼)))) AHHHHHHHHHH

OHHHHHHHH

HEH. I’M ALREADY DEAD, HORIKOSHI, YOU BASTARD. DO YOUR WORST. GO ON

YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON “US”, HE SAYS. ALONG WITH A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF OMG. KACCHAN, YOU STUDIED!! YOU UNDERSTAND!! PREACH!!

OH NO!!

OH WAIT!!!!

LOL I GOT SCARED THERE FOR A SECOND BUT ANYWAY! EVERYONE GET IN HERE!!! GROUP HUG!!! OR WAIT, NO, WHAT ABOUT -- [GRABS YOUR COLLAR URGENTLY] YOU DON’T THINK -- COULD THEY POSSIBLY -- !!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ARE YOU GONNA HUG!??!?!?!?! I AM NOT OKAY!!!!!!! !!!hgk

REACTION PANELS LOL EVERYONE ELSE IS ON THE EDGE OF THEIR SEATS TOO WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER

LOL OCHAKO

I KNOW THAT IN REALITY THIS FACE IS JUST BECAUSE SHE’S CONCERNED ABOUT DEKU’S FRAGILE STATE RN, BUT I KEEP THINKING ABOUT THE WAY SHE JUST DROPPED IIDA COLD THOUGH, AND I CAN’T HELP BUT FEAR FOR KACCHAN’S SAFETY LMAO. THAT FEELING WHEN THE CLASS PERV AND THE CLASS BULLY BOTH BEAT YOU TO THE LOVE CONFESSION. KACCHAN WATCH YOUR SIX

OKAY BUT LOOK, IT’S NOT THAT I DON’T LOVE ALL OF THE OTHER KIDS, OKAY, BUT CAN WE PLEASE!??!?! HELLO?!?!? MOMO, JUST -- COULD YOU JUST FOR A MINUTE --

NOOOOOOOOOOO

“DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT, I HAVE TO SAVE SOMETHING FOR THE FINALE” HORIKOSHI YOU BETTER WATCH OUT, I’M COMING FOR YOU WITH A TWO BY FOUR!! NOT THAT I’M UNGRATEFUL!! BUT JESUS CHRIST, YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT, AND THEN ALMOST DO THAT, AND THEN NOT!! OMG I HATE YOU

sure let’s cut to Thirteen then, yay. I mean I’m glad they’re alive lol, don’t get me wrong

(ETA: I think that might have sounded a bit sarcastic so I just want to clarify that I really am happy Thirteen is alive and on the job again lol.)

it’s just that if your name doesn’t begin with Baku or Deku I honestly am not interested for just these next five minutes okay lol. like I’m just gonna be completely honest. I am too invested lol, please, they were having a moment, JUST LET ME HAVE THIS PLEASE

OH DAMN U.A. GOT SWOLE AF

THIS SCHOOL HAS BEEN JUICING WTF. I THOUGHT YOU WERE TARTARUS LOL

I’m literally not even reading the speech bubbles though omg I’m so sorry. I really hope there is not a quiz, I promise I will come back to it later scroll scroll scroll

okay so they brought him back to U.A. and he’s all tired and out of it yes

oh goody Hagakure knows all about the security system

(ETA: is it just me or is Horikoshi really laying it on thick with the hints about these two guys lately? I’m on to you sir.)

THAT’S WONDERFUL NEWS. GLAD THIS CRITICAL KNOWLEDGE IS SAFE IN THE HANDS OF THE PEOPLE THAT WE TRUST

ffs Deku

WHAT WILL IT EVEN TAKE TO CONVINCE YOU THEN?? SWEET JESUS

-- holy shit, what??!

they know?? how did they find out??! holy shit???

I’m about to cancel the whole of Japan lmao. fucking try me dudes

-- THE PRINCIPAL!?

NEZU GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!! WHAT THE FUCK

“a ticking time bomb” tell you what, this man is just asking to be punched in the face. literally begging for it omg

(ETA: I have been advised that I misread this part; Rat Principal told everyone how safe U.A. was, but he’s not the one who ratted out Deku; that was “the rumors”, apparently. which, if I had to guess, were probably started by AFO.)

oh I see, so it’s to be Feels, Part II then

he looks so sad and tired and lonely and she goes right for the hand, god bless. though if Kacchan’s not gonna hug him, you’d think someone would at least. or is it because he still smells bad. hmm

AND THE CHAPTER’S ENDING ON HER LOL WELL OKAY THEN

I MEAN IT’S GREAT AND ALL, I LOVE OCHAKO REALLY I DO, BUT WE WERE PROMISED GREAT EXPLOSION MURDER GODS, WHAT GIVES SOB. I WAS ALL READY TO BREAK OUT INTO SONG AND EVERYTHING. SURE, HE DID THE APOLOGY, BUT WHERE IS THE FOLLOW-UP GODDAMMIT

(ETA: just to clarify the reason for my rambling here, I was really waiting for the hero name reveal and the presumed deeper meaning behind it lol. but I guess that is a conversation still to come! and we still need Deku’s response to the apology too for that matter. lots to look forward to still.)

WELL WHATEVER, SO THAT IS THE END OF THE CHAPTER! SHOUT OUT TO MY BOY RAT “LET ME JUST TELL EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD ABOUT DEKU’S SUPER SECRET IDENTITY, I GUESS THAT’S ALL RIGHT NOW, NOTHING BAD COULD POSSIBLY COME OF THIS” PRINCIPAL. listen here you little shit

anyway but if you’ll excuse me... IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME. IF I COULD FIND A WAY. I’D TAKE BACK THOSE WORDS THAT HAVE HURT YOU, AND YOU’D STAY. I DON’T KNOW WHY I DID THE THINGS I DID. I DON’T KNOW WHY I SAID THE THINGS I SAID. PRIDE’S LIKE A KNIFE, IT CAN CUT DEEP INSIDE. WORDS ARE LIKE WEAPONS, THEY WOUND SOMETIMES. BUM~ BUM~ BUM~, I DIDN’T REALLY MEAN TO HURT YOU. BUM~ BUM~ BUM~, I DIDN’T WANNA SEE YOU GO. I KNOW I MADE YOU CRY, BUT BABAY, IF I COULD TUUUUURN BACK TIIIIIIIIIIIME...

[shyficwriter]

Who's Tougher Part 3

Guardians of the Galaxy fanfic | Reader x Guardians (With Yondu and Kraglin!) Guest starring Thor & Loki

Summary: If you were expecting anything the day after the Guardians find out you're a Nephilim, it wasn't for Thor and Loki to decide to "pop-in" for a visit. Too bad Yondu won't let you hide.

Author’s Note: Part 1 here. Part 2 here.

Word Count: 1,873

You were on the lower deck helping Yondu and Kraglin sort out the best course for an upcoming job. They hadn't brought up anything from the night before and you were grateful for that. You could feel the others staring at you all morning, and so you jumped at the chance to join the two men below deck to work.

Like, you got it. You really did. It would be odd to find out one of your friends had been hiding that they had certain powers or extra abilities, but it was nice to be with a couple of people who at least pretended they didn't give a crap about finding out you weren't actually Terran.

And for the most part, it was true. Yondu and Kraglin didn't care if you weren't Terran. They had raised Peter knowing he was half-celestial for 24 years. You being a Nephilim probably wasn't much different, and the fact that you admitted you didn't use your powers because you couldn't control them pretty much put you in the same boat as Peter, far as they were concerned. It also didn't look like you were gonna start wanting special treatment, if anything it was obvious you would abhor anything like that happening, so yeah, they didn't really care as long as you continued pulling your weight. Far as they were concerned, nothing had changed.

You had opened your mouth to ask Yondu a question when you heard an all-too-familiar voice booming out a happy greeting from the floor above you, followed by Mantis's bubbly excited cry of "Peter! Thor came to visit! And he brought a friend!"

You eyes went wide and you paled, dropping your pen and whatever else you were doing in an instant. "Oh no- Oh fuck-"

"What?" Yondu asked, looking at you strangely. He of course had heard it too, but he wasn't really expecting the look of fear that was in your eyes. Yeah, you had looked awful nervous when Rocket had called the "Thunder Man," but now that almost looked like genuine horror in your eyes. He wondered if he should be worried or amused, and from the look on Kraglin's face, he did too.

"I've got to get out of here." you say, starting to back away while still looking at the ceiling.

"No ya don't," said Kraglin, grabbing your arm and pulling you back. He realized this was likely the perfect time to find out why you were so nervous when Rocket called Thor last night. "Not until you at least tell us what's got ya so scared of Thor and his brother."

You looked at Yondu pleadingly, but he only nodded in agreement with Kraglin.

"Can we maybe do this later?" you plead, your urgency to hide becoming ever more apparent when a voice, softer than Thor's, could be heard asking one of the others upstairs if you were around.

Yondu almost laughed. He hadn't seen you like this before, but whatever had gotten your pants in a twist was clearly the fault of whoever was upstairs. "Nah, I wanna hear what's got you all riled up. This fella an ex-boyfriend of yers or somethin'?"

You make a face at him. "No!"

"Then what? Spill it, otherwise I might just be tempted to call them down here myself." Yondu chuckled.

You glare back at him. "You wouldn't dare."

"He really would, trust me." Kraglin warned, grinning.

"Ugh, fine!" you relented. "When we were younger, there was this prank that sorta went wrong..."

"Go on," Yondu prodded, intrigued.

"And well, you see, I didn't mean for it to happen, but I might have sorta accidentally made Loki lose his hair. Like all of it. Not just on his his head, everywhere. Eyebrows, everything. I heard it took months to start growing back in fully..." you nervously fidgeted, "and I imagine he's probably still real sore about that."

Yondu laughed. "That's all? If that happened when ya'll were kids I doubt he even remembers. I don't see what yer worried about." Sure, maybe it was because Yondu never had much hair himself save for his beard, but he didn't really see what the big deal was.

"You clearly don't know him then," you say, "so if you'll excuse me I'm going to go hide."

Yondu scoffed. "Last I checked we don't hide from our problems like scared babies. How can ya expect to call yerself a guardian of the galaxy if you're gonna run and hide like a scared little orloni? Ya gotta face up to yer fears, not run from them."

You tried to reason with him. "No- you don't understand-"

"I understand plenty enough. Yer gonna march up there and face yer fears like an adult."

"You really don't understand," you pleaded, "I'd have a better chance with the airlock. I can't!"

Yondu rolled his eyes, "Yes ya can. Come on." he then collared you and began to march you towards the stairs. Kraglin followed, fighting not to giggle at the sight.

"No- wait- Yondu- please! Come on!" Your pleas fell on deaf ears the entire way up the stairs until you reached the landing and Yondu turned you to face him.

"Look here. Either ya can straighten up and face this fella, or you can embarrass yourself by continuing to act like a scared little kid, what's it gonna be?"

You look at him pitifully and say, "I really hate you right now."

He only grinned and said, "I know it," before ushering you forward towards the sounds of the voices, keeping his hand on your shoulder.

When you neared the doorway of the room the others were in Yondu felt you start to resist again, but he just pushed you on without a word, chuckling to himself and throwing an amused look at Kraglin, who was grinning wide. All too soon the three of you were standing in the doorway, staring at the rest of the team as they caught up with Thor.

You forced a small smile when Mantis looked over and happily announced your arrival, prompting Thor to turn towards you with a big smile and begin to approach you, calling your name and opening his arms for a hug.

Yondu gave you a not-completely-gentle push when Thor got close enough and you collided the the tall man as he embraced you. You returned the hug, tentatively at first, but then fully. If you were honest with yourself, you had missed him too, and it was nice to be hugged by your old friend.

After a moment or two he pulled away so he could look at you. "It's been so long! No wonder I didn't recognize you!" He chuckled, adding, "I guess 800 years will do that though, I'm sure I also look very different, so it's no wonder you didn't recognize me as well."

Well, that saved your ass in one regard, at least he wouldn't be hurt by (rightfully) thinking you'd been avoiding him and Loki.

"I'm sorry, did you just say 800 years?" Peter interjected.

You gave a sheepish look to your team, who all had wide, surprised eyes. There were several open mouths about the bunch. You were sure if you turned around to look Yondu and Kraglin might have matched their expressions.

Thor looked between you and the rest of the gang before looking back at you with a chuckle, "Didn't tell them?"

You shrugged, still looking sheepish. "Do you think they'd have believed me?" you say with a slight chuckle, throwing a nervous look at Peter and Gamora who still looked like they were processing this new information.

Thor grinned. "I guess not." He then stepped aside, beckoning Loki to say hi to his old friend, cooing about how much you had changed since they'd seen you last.

It wasn't until then that you had gotten a good look at Loki, as Thor's larger frame had obscured him before. He didn't approach to crush you in a hug like Thor, instead staying where he was and offering a little wave as he grinned. You grin nervously and offer a wave in return. You could feel a heat rising in your cheeks.

Dammit.

Of course he would have grown up pretty. His hair certainly came back nicely.

You try to shake the thought from your mind as you turn to Thor and ask, "So, um, what brings you guys here?"

To your surprise, Thor put his arm around your shoulder and walked you closer to where everyone else was at. "Well, Rabbit's call lost signal before I could find Loki," He released you and you turned back to the doorway to see that while Yondu and Kraglin had also stepped further into the room, they remained close to the door, grinning. They were blocking the door so you couldn't run away, the bastards. Thor continued, "so Loki suggested we just pop-by for a visit instead." Thor answered with a grin.

Your head snapped back toward the group. So it was Loki's idea? Oh no.

Loki's grin seemed to get wider. "Yes, I thought it'd be fun to catch up with an old friend. I can't for the life of me remember why we lost touch. Do you?" His eyes seemed to sparkle with glee, and you were certain you weren't imagining it.

You swallowed, forcing a smile. He absolutely remembered. Crap. "Um, no. I have no idea either..." you lied, praying that no one else noticed the blush in your cheeks. "I guess things just... happen."

"Would you guys like to stay for supper?" Gamora offered, and Peter gave her a look. Peter and Thor had only just barely gotten past their dick-measuring contest the last time he was here, and his ego was still a little bruised. Gamora caught his look and clarified, "That way everyone can catch up more? Drax will be making stew."

Stay for supper? Oh no. It was only just after lunch, they'd be here for hours if they stayed for supper. Gamora, why?? Well, it was just an offer, they may decline...

Thor and Loki exchanged looks each meant to ask if the other cared before shrugging and Thor answering that they'd love to stay for supper.

Damn.

Yondu spoke up. "Hell, why not stay a couple days!" Peter shot him a look as well before he caught Yondu's wink. "After all, you three must have a lot of catchin' up to do if it's been 800 years since ya'll seen each other last."

You throw a pleading glare at the Centaurian and Thor speaks up, "Oh, we could never impose like that-"

You quietly sighed. Thank goodness.

"Nonsense, boy!" Yondu says, approaching to put his arms around you and Thor's shoulders. "We're happy to have the company. Right, Quill?"

Aw, hell, Yondu! Seriously!? You wanted to kill him.

To your dismay Peter had read the room and now sported a smile. "Yeah. Stay a couple days, I insist."

Your nostrils flared. These fuckers were working against you. However, your blood ran cold when you heard Loki's smooth voice say, "Well, brother, they did insist," and then heard Thor finally agree to staying.

Loki met your eyes, grinning wide.

You were so dead.

[echos-newlegs]

Modern!Wrecker as a Country Boy/Redneck head canons:

Here is my one over Echo, I plan on doing the rest later!

These are all based off @spaceydragons original post! Please check out their blog they have some rad ideas 😌💙

Okay so Wrecker would be the aggressive hard-core one of the group

By aggressive I mean "not afraid to get dirty, BUT would not even harm a fly."

He is very soft and isn't too fond of hunting. He loves wildlife too much to hurt it

One time you and him were hiking and he found a baby bunny and nearly started bawling because of how cute it was.

You and him often go on nature walks

If you know a lot about nature and explain things to him about it he will love you for 1000+ years.

He loves hearing your passions

He will pick you up to set you on tree branches for giggles. Unless your scared of heights, then he won't.

Be ready to go mudding because he loves it, with his big truck that can get out of anything because him and Tech customized it.

He will also love you forever if you bake pies

You often have to chase his away from the kitchen while they're cooling(yes, he gets his own pie. We spoil him in this household)

10/10 piggy back rides

Your feet are tired? Piggy back ride

You're sad? Piggy back ride

You're sick? Piggy back ride to the living room if you wanna lay on the couch because he will not let you do anything BUT sleep

Everyone thinks he's well- dumb, but he's actually really smart.

He may not be book smart, but he is street smart

He can fix vehicles like no other

He taught you everything you know about vehicles

Oh, you also better hope you aren't allergic to dogs because he comes home with a new one at least once a month

So be thankful tbb has a lot of land they own

When you two first start dating he's afraid you won't like how rowdy he can get, and how messy he can be, but you don't mind one bit and he loves you for it.

He saw you playing with Omega once and his heart melted. He thought he was going to combust with how adorable it was

Man will eat everything you cook

Even if it's the first time you made something and it didn't turn out great

He doesn't care, he will do anything to see that pretty smile of yours

Idkw but I feel like he asked you out by saying, "wanna be the cowgirl to my cowboy?" And everyone was astounded that 1. He overcame his awkwardness and thought of the line and 2. That you said yes.

Wrecker will never admit he heard Echo use it once at 79s

Wrecker loves picking you flowers, unless you have really bad allergies

Then he refrains and just points out the pretty ones that reminds him of you when you go on your walks.

When the two of you go to town he helps you pick out plants for the garden

He has his own flower garden and you cannot change my mind

But I feel like ladybugs frighten him

He got bit by a cornbug(they look like lady bugs) once when he was younger and it traumatized him

He likes watching the bees, but if they get too close he screams and runs inside

Same with wasps and spiders

Once he was attacked by a Pray Mantis and he has now decided he only likes butterflies and moths

He LOVES lifting you up to help you pick from the fruit trees 🥺🥺

If he sees you struggling to reach. Instead of reaching for you

He also loves swimming with you.

He grabs you by the waist and lifts you up, or sets you on his shoulders.

You often find him walking around with one of your hens under his arm.

He calls himself the chicken whisperer because only he can pick them up without them running away.

The two of you always win at the game chicken against his brothers and the 501st

Only time he's been jealous was when you paid more attention to a dog than you did him on one of his needy days

Other than that he's not really a jealous type. He trusts you

Oh, he also loves tractors and will take you for rides in them

Tractor rides can occasionally get steamy as well iykyk

He has ptsd and nightmares from the war and you are always what calms him

Even just your gentle breaths and presence in his arms while you sleep next to him is enough to calm him down.

He gave Lula to Omega, so for his birthday you made him a Lula 2.0 out of an old dress/shirt of yours and an old flannel of his. The dress/shirt was one of his favorites that you wore, but it was old and ripping so you put it to good use.

If you guys get a place of your own you occasionally steal Omega, and Cuts kids on weekends because you and Wrecker are the best Aunt/Uncle and Uncle

This man will sing to you out of the blue and is a really good singer. I don't make the rules

Man makes you blush after he's been working outside for a while 😳

Oh, you also get to borrow his oversized shirts and flannels

He also will save up money to buy you matching bracelets or necklaces

He would get a locket with you in it so he always has you by his heart 😌

In conclusion. He is a wholesome man, looking for a lover who would get muddy with him.

I could write more but it is currently 1am 😭

I might make another post for more ideas later or just write him a small drabble for wholesome purposes

Tags

@andiebell2023 @kaitou2417 @murdertoothpick

If you want tagged in future posts comment "future tag"!

[buglife]

You guys know I love bugs.

But why?

Tw: I talk about an abusive past and how bugs helped me because it's early in the morning and I had nightmares and I just wanted to say this. Feel free to ignore!

All my life I've really loved bugs. I grew up in the country in a little trailer with no central heating or ac. We had a wood stove to keep warm and I lived on 85 acres of ancient woodland. So yeah, it was full of bugs! One of my earliest memories was being in bed and seeing a praying mantis come down from a hole in the ceiling. She hung out with me for a while and caught a fly that was bothering me so that was pretty awesome.

I also remember watching Pirates of the Dark Water and looking next to me to see a bigass wolf spider watching tv too. Groovy.

Now my brother and father are incredibly awful people. I won't go into details but they were horrible. And one thing that always struck me as being funny, was that they were scared of bugs. ESPECIALLY millipedes! So sometimes to protect myself, I would go out in the woods and find a couple cherry foot millipedes and hold them so that they would think twice about coming after me. Them and snakes. I would just hold wild snakes and they wouldn't come near me, but millipedes were easier to find.

So yeah, big tough guys who had no trouble beating and abusing a little girl, being absolutely terrified of one of the most harmless order of bugs in the world. I found that kinda funny.

Everytime I wanted to talk about bugs, I was told to shut the hell up because nobody cared about what I had to say, because I was stupid and girls should be seen and not heard. So I stayed quiet for years.

I saw myself in bugs, to be honest. They were hated and misunderstood, which is how my 'family' treated me. I was too young to understand why I wasn't loved. I didn't understand why I was treated like an awful burden to the family. I felt like a spider, or a millipede. They try so, so hard to be what they are and to help the world but are subject to the vicious cruelty of those bigger and stronger than themselves. People have no problem torturing them just because they were small and helpless. I was small and helpless too.

Nobody advocated for me when I was small and helpless. Nobody showed me mercy. I was on the same level as a bug, ignored at best and harmed at worse. At least bugs didn't hurt me. I could pick up a brown recluse and have it not bite me because it only bites when afraid. I may not have a venomous bite, but I was tenacious and eventually, I escaped that life and now live where I am now.

So now I can have my bugs, bugs that my father used to threaten to kill at any given moment. I remember him telling me that if I ever got a pet bug, he would come over to my house just to kill them. Well, he can certainly try, I have pepper gel. And that will go right into his eyes if he tries something. I have my bugs, and I'm no longer afraid of him. I'm free to do what I always wanted to do, free to care for things that have no voice to help themselves. I will make sure that all my bugs are loved and have the best lives possible. They make me happy. They give me so much joy. I feel honored and privilaged to be able to take a tarantula sling, the size of my pinkie nail, and care for them enough to grow up fully. The fact I can share my life with such wonderful and unique creatures is amazing.

I am so much happier and healthier now. I have since cut my 'family' out of my life going on seven years ago. I am healing. I have a loving girlfriend who loves bugs, probably not as much as me, but she got me rubber ducky isopods as a gift. She knows I don't care about jewelry or anything like that, but a gift of bugs? Perfect.

I actually planned to be an entomologist when I grew up, but I couldn't get the math grades to get the degree. So I went for fine arts instead lol.

So that's why I love bugs, and why I flip my shit at people casually hurting bugs for no reason but to get a power trip from it. I've learned that people who are willing to do that are willing to hurt people too.

Also I'm okay now. I have therapy and medication and a new found family who loves me very much and allows me to talk about bugs as much as I want to :3

[miraizu]

Maybe a killua having to break up with his innocent s/o to take care of his sister and then a few years later he meets her again n shes a bad bitch, like shes changed n takes no ones bs and is a player bc she got hurt. Like no longer cute n innocent but hot n a baddie. Kskskskssksk ily

we stan a bad bitch.

also, this turned out MUCH longer than I meant for it to be, askkdklsjfd sorry!

        "I'm breaking up with you."

        Faltering as you were eating your ice cream, your eyebrows knit together in confusion.  "You're....  what?"

        The boy across from you looked pained, but resolute.  "I can't protect both you and Alluka, [Y/n].  This is for your own safety."

        You couldn't believe your ears.  Blinking rapidly, you willed yourself not to cry to no avail.  Fat tears rolled down your cheeks, your ice cream all but forgotten as it dribbled down the side of the cone, staining your hand.

        "But--"

        Killua Zoldyck, your boyfriend - well, now ex-boyfriend - cut you off.  "No.  I'm not changing my mind.  You're too...  Nice.  Innocent.  I have to focus on protecting my sister first."

        You didn't stop him as he walked away, staring after him in shock, your heart breaking in two.

        And that was the last you had ever seen of Killua Zoldyck.

---

        "I'd like two scoops, please."

        Ordering your favorite flavor of ice cream, you took the cone gratefully and went outside the parlour, the sun beating down mercilessly.  You sat down at the first table, smile wry as you let your mind wander while you waited for your date to arrive.

        Five years...  In this very spot, five years ago, you had broken up with your only love.  It had hurt at the time, but now looking back, you were grateful.  It was a much-needed kick you needed to get your life together.  Killua had been right - you had been too innocent, naive and ignorant to the world's true nature.  Once he had left, you had vowed to never be weak again.  You couldn't afford it; you needed to be able to protect yourself.

        "[Y/n]!"

        Looking up as you lazily slurped your ice cream, you tried to keep yourself from grimacing.  The guy you were going out on a 'date' with was much older, easily in his 30's and not at all attractive, but that was fine.  You weren't here to actually date him.  The man before you was a child killer, and you were here under the pretense of a date to lure him out and kill him.

        And that's how it always went.  After training and fighting and honing in your nen, you had figured the best way to live your life was to use your "naivety" to your advantage and kill the bad people of this world.

        The man grinned at you, a leer that made a chill go down your spine.  "You're much more gorgeous in person."

        "Thank you," you responded demurely, standing up.  You finished the ice cream cone, throwing away the wrapped and giving him an icy polite smile.  "Should we get going, then?"

        The man immediately draped an arm around your shoulder, grip just a bit too tight.  You kept a neutral face.  "Yes.  Let's."

---

        The man had moved quicker than you had expected.  Most of the time, you had to do all of the work to get the men alone, but this guy was either impatient or sloppy as he pressed you up against a brick wall in an alley, lips at your neck.  You remained cool, slowly reaching down to grab the knife that was hidden in your waistband - the moment you withdrew it, though, he had grabbed your wrist, twisting it painfully, the dagger clattering to the ground noisily.

        "Shit!"

        His face was blank, eyes soulless as he looked at you, unamused.  "You really think I don't know who you are?  Mantis - you're the one killing people from the underground."

        You gritted your teeth, and without anymore banter, you swung your knee up, kneeing him right in the crotch.  The man immediately bent over, yelping in pain, and you didn't hesitate when you grabbed the back of his head and slammed it into the wall.  He wasn't down for the count yet as he twisted out of your grip, managing to pull your leg forward and causing you to fall.  When he stood up, you could see blood streaming from his forehead from where he had hit the wall.

        "You little - GGGK!"

        The man froze, and you blinked, confused as he fell down to the ground.  What the hell just happened . . . ?

        "Seriously?  Five years and you're still getting into danger?"

        Five years, and you recognized that voice.  Scrambling, you stood up, outrage flashing across your features - turning around, you saw a familiar head of white hair.  His nails were still sharpened, and you knew the little pouch he held in his hands was that guy's heart, an assassin technique you had seen plenty of times before.

        "I'm not some damsel in distress, I had it under control!  What the hell are you doing here?!"

        Blue eyes squinted at you in confusion.  "Is that...  Really you, [Y/n]?  You actually sound angry."

        You threw your arms up in the air in exasperation, not at all amused by the turn in events.  "This was my job.  That was my kill, and I did not ask for or need your stupid, goddamn help!"

        Killua continued to squint at you, dropping the heart he held in his hands.  You barely noted that there wasn't any blood, meaning he had actually perfected the technique.  "You're different," he pointed out, pure confusion in his voice.

        You did not want to deal with this.  Not right now.  Walking towards the alley entrance, you didn't even give the now-dead serial killer a second glance, a glower on your face.  "You're different," you mocked in annoyance under your breath.  "It's been five years, and we're adults now.  Did you think I was going to be the same, cute little [Y/n] you once dated?  I learned nen and can protect myself now, asshole."

        Killua stepped to the side, blocking you from leaving the alley, and you huffed in even more annoyance.

        "Move."

        Unsurprisingly, he ignored you.  "You're the Praying Mantis - you lure murderers and predators in, and then brutally murder them."  You kept your face stoic, not denying his claim.  "That's honestly kind of hot."

        Okay, no.

        Shoving past him, you shook your head, muttering obscenities under your breath.  "Fuck everything.  For real."

        Killua didn't bother to follow you out, instead calling out.  "I'll see you later!"

        It was only when you were further down the street and had pulled out your phone that a sleep of paper fell out, and you immediately picked it up, immediately recognizing what the set of numbers were.  A phone number.

        When the hell did he . . . ?

        Shaking your head, you finally allowed a dry smile to grow on your face.  Five years, and while a lot has changed...  Somethings, it seems, never changed, and it took all you had to ignore the beating of your heart.

        Even after all of these years, all of these changes . . . 

        You still loved Killua.