#appropriate that they become bffs really

[vidavalor]

Hi! In your post earlier today discussing the importance of subplots, you said

“You might think a subplot about The Hellhound and The Ginger Cat learning to play nice and that they have a fuckton in common and should maybe bury the hatchet and just become eternal bffs already is filler but Crowley and Gabriel aligning is set up for the end game.”

and you included a gif of them looking out the window together while Crowley explains his plan to make Nina and Maggie “vavoom.” It reminded me of something that puzzled me on yesterday’s rewatch, and I thought maybe you might have written about it already or, if not, have some thoughts you could share.

We see multiple glimpses of Crowley and Jim/Gabriel in the bookshop while Aziraphale is away in Edinburgh. Crowley seems tolerant, even maybe friendly — certainly not afraid. Then, in the “smited? smote? smitten” scene, we see Crowley wary of returning to the bookshop because of the “amnesiac archangel hiding out” there. And, when he does go to “talk to” Gabriel/Jim at Aziraphale’s suggestion, he is clearly very angry.

I guess I’m wondering why we see Crowley go from initially suspicious (terrified) to seemingly unconcerned (willing to bond alone with Jim in the bookshop) to suspicious (angry) again. I’m not sure whether the important part here is the absence of suspicion in the middle or the return of suspicion nearer the end.

(On a side note, after countless rewatches, this is the first time I heard Crowley whistle at Aziraphale at the start of the smitten scene!)

I appreciate any thoughts you might have to share and I’m grateful for all your recent posts about the upcoming conclusion to this story. I’m glad that be getting one and thought your recent statement summed it up perfectly. “It's going to be very queer and very Pratchett and very good.”

Hi there, @killingmenotatallsoftly! Thanks for reading that meta, for the kind words & for the ask. 💕 I'd be happy to share some thoughts & you can see what you think. There is hot chocolate, of course, because there is nothing more appropriate for meta involving Gabriel and tough topics than that. *starts gathering marshmallows and other mix-in options*

I'm really glad you sent this question because I've seen some other people with similar confusion. I think I can help because Crowley's behavior, imho, is 150% a trauma-related thing. It's actually such a good portrayal of it that diving a bit on this fictional demon's issues might be helpful for some for better recognizing trauma-adjacent behavior with actual people in real life as well, which is why I wound up making this post a whole thing about how trauma informs a lot of Crowley's behavior. That is why it took a minute-- thank you for your patience! 😊

A deep dive under the cut below on how Crowley's PTSD is shown in his behavior, including in his response to Gabriel's presence in the bookshop, and what all of this has to do with his story arc around self-doubt.

TWs: PTSD; anxiety; rape; fire-related trauma... if Crowley's living with it, it's probably in here somewhere.

Crowley's up-and-down response to Gabriel in S2 actually doesn't have that all much to do with Gabriel himself. It has everything, though, to do with Crowley's own trauma-adjacent self-doubt issues.

When a person survives traumatic events, they are very often wired as a result of the trauma to become hyper-vigilant when it comes to their sense of personal safety. This is especially true of those who, like Crowley, have suffered violations to their bodily autonomy and those who, also like Crowley, have developed PTSD. This is related to the self-doubt issues, as we'll see.

One example of this self-doubt is given to us in S2 and that's the revelation that, since S1, Crowley-- a demon of Hell who can make fire with his body-- is now, as a result of the bookshop fire in S1, terrified of fire.

Fire has become a trigger for Crowley's PTSD to such an extent that Aziraphale, in an effort to help Crowley manage his anxiety over this, has replaced every candle in the bookshop with battery-operated ones and scattered fire extinguishers all over the shop. He's even replaced the tapers in the candelabra with LED battery-operated ones so they can continue their candlelit dinners, noticeable when he wields the candelabra like a sword during the bookshop attack.

Aziraphale has done this because the fire in S1 had so triggered Crowley's PTSD that he had been having trouble relaxing in the bookshop, which is the only place he has been able to go for the last few hundred years and be and feel truly safe.

Changing the lights to battery-powered and electric ones are an effort to reduce the likelihood of another fire and the fire extinguishers are there to help Crowley feel more in control. He needs to know that he can quickly and easily put out another fire, should one start. Aziraphale understands this and has been doing what he does best, which is try to help Crowley feel safe.

Crowley's continued trauma over the bookshop fire is also a great example of self-doubt, though, in the sense that he's in a period with his PTSD where it has worsened and, as a result, Crowley is afraid of something that his body is actually capable of making.

In other words: he's afraid of himself.

In S2, Crowley is having trouble overcoming self-doubt about his ability to assess a situation, which can be a very common element of PTSD.

It's not a new thing for Crowley but it was worsened by him watching in S1 as his safe space and the place he considers his home burnt down around him while he, more importantly, thought he had lost the only person he feels truly safe with-- the love of his life-- all at once.

So, why and how does Crowley doubt his ability to assess a situation?

What often happens as a result of being raped is that the person who was harmed feels as if it were their own mistakes that led them to be in a place to have been attacked and that, while the perpetrator is to blame for the assault, they themselves hold some blame for having been in a position where they were vulnerable to being hurt.

This is not true. The only person who holds blame here is the perpetrator and, intellectually, many survivors know that, but trauma response is emotional, not logical. Whether it's conscious, semi-conscious, or unconscious, one of the most difficult aspects to heal from for someone who has survived these kinds of horrors is often the feeling that they hold some blame for it.

Often, resulting behavior from this, though, is that the survivor is always worried on some level that there's something that they are missing that could impact their ability to accurately read a situation.

They are worried that they're going to miss something that puts them in a position to be hurt again in some way or that will endanger those they care about. After all, they think, if they once failed to judge the situation that got them so badly harmed, how can they trust themselves to be sure that they won't make a similar mistake again?

This causes them to react with an extreme sense of hypervigilance around safety that can often get a bit illogical at times, depending on the situation.

This all goes hand-in-hand with other trauma-related behavior we see in Crowley, especially his control-seeking behavior. To be clear: I am not saying controlling behavior, I am saying control-seeking behavior-- rituals and actions in everyday life that are about trying to regain through unrelated things the sense of self-control that was taken in the assault. Crowley's sunglasses, driving, obsessive cleaning, etc. are all examples of control-seeking behavior.

Everyone reacts differently to different forms of trauma but Crowley's story is using pretty much all the hallmarks of common struggles and behavior patterns in people who have been assaulted and who have developed rape-related PTSD and, at the same time, it has shown Satan assaulting him through non-consensual possession, emphasized that as allegorical for rape all over the story, and shown that it was not a new thing the first time we saw it in 1.01.

There is nothing funny about having suffered trauma but there can be some objectively funny aspects to trying to deal with the aftermath of it. Good Omens is great at finding humor in the dark things while also respecting that it's dark stuff, which is a tricky line to walk but is something that is done very well in a very trauma-informed way in Discworld. Sometimes, the easiest way to come at the dark stuff is actually through a comedy but it's a delicate thing and I think what resonates about it in this story for people who have been through different traumas is how they hit the right notes with it.

Crowley's obsessive cleanliness, his spotless flat, his alphabetized music and books, are all because he self-soothes by maintaining order when it comes to the material objects around him. He is at home in Aziraphale's cluttered bookshop but he needs that particular clutter to be undisturbed to a point that he's bothered by Gabriel moving one pile of books from one place to another.

The sunglasses are an attempt at control-seeking behavior because they allow him control over how others see him and mask his full expression from others, allowing him to feel more powerful by feeling more aloof. The biggest example of this stuff, though, is The Bentley.

It's a truth universally acknowledged that many, many people who are pretty far into rape recovery and are more functioning than not with PTSD, if they've developed it, fucking love to drive.

This might initially seem counter-intuitive to what I'm saying because the hypervigilance aspects of PTSD and the overall concern for safety sometimes result in survivors being less risk-averse and driving comes with risks. Its rewards tend to outweigh those risks for many survivors pretty quickly, though. Driving is actually an activity that helps build back self-trust in survivors and it's the ultimate in a sense of control.

People who have survived stuff like this benefit from small, frequent examples of successful situations of which they were fully in control to help build self-trust and work on overcoming self-doubt.

Driving a car requires the successful navigation of several tons worth of machinery from Point A to Point B without accident or injury and back again. It's simple but simple is often the point because survivors need both to feel in control of themselves and their immediate environment while also proving to themselves that they can trust themselves to assess situations. Driving solves those issues at once and helps build that confidence back in people.

It's what makes the already horrifying scene in 1.01 a thousand times worse. The decision to show Satan going through every one of Crowley's desperate attempts at defenses is what emphasizes the brutality of this but it was the fact that Crowley was driving when this happened as part of our re-introduction to him in the first episode that makes it even worse.

That his control over the car is forcibly taken from him and he has to watch as he comes within a breath of killing the guy in the on-coming truck is basically one of his worst nightmares. This guy we've seen wearing the dark clothes, the sunglasses at night, dripping in snark, is already someone for whom abuse is clearly, horribly, nothing new, but it's seeing him lose control of his ability to drive that emphasizes the horror of his loss of control over himself.

This moment is mercifully fairly short, if only because of Crowley needing to deliver the baby to start Armageddon. It shows us, though, that the point is the cruelty with Satan. The only information he gives to Crowley during the assault are instructions as to where to drop off the baby-- information that Hastur & Ligur could have been told to verbally give Crowley. He assaulted Crowley for his own pleasure, to try to exert power and control over him, and part of that involved not relinquishing control so Crowley could drive until Crowley almost killed a human... all with Satan's own infant son in the backseat the whole time. Crowley's inability to use miracles when possessed like that means he wouldn't have been able to stop Satan from forcing him to do someone harm (compounding the guilt and self-loathing from his fall) and he might have thought, during one or more times of this, that he was going to die himself.

So. Yeah. Many people who go through the real world horrors that Crowley's story is about are often just like he is, in that they usually have an overwhelmingly common tendency to need to feel every bit of control over themselves that they can, in an effort to compensate for the control that was robbed from them. They often like to drive, they often relax by cleaning, they likely will absolutely self-soothe by re-alphabetizing their already alphabetized collections...

They might even also try to deal with these control problems and their anger and depression by taking that 'grow a garden to experience some self-trust wins' thing a little too intensely...

I'm not even being tongue-in-cheek here-- gardening, especially small batches of indoor container gardening, is one of the most frequently recommended activities for people who suffer from PTSD. It's low-maintenance enough that it doesn't overwhelm someone experiencing anxiety and/or depression and there are some houseplants that are borderline unkillable, making it a safe, likely win.

Keeping plants alive can be therapeutic for people who find it difficult to trust themselves because they can often find a win in having looked after the plant's basic needs enough to have kept it from dying, which also comes with the joy and pride in seeing it grow. We all can see from a hundred miles away Crowley's issues projected all the fuck over his gardening 😂 but, as um, Crowls, you good over there? as him pretty clearly reenacting his fall and lording over his plants, it's a healthier direction for his anger than taking it out on people would be. Better he's screaming at the plants he thinks don't really understand him than at Aziraphale.

The spots on the leaves really, really bother him, though, because he personalizes the growth of the plants. The criticism isn't really about the plants-- it's self-criticism he's projecting onto them. If the plants aren't lushing up perfectly constantly, Crowley yells at them but he's really blaming himself because he's the one in control of taking care of them. The spots, in his mind, reflect a failure on his part to have anticipated the needs of the plants-- a situation he did not properly assess, a thing that he should have seen coming and missed.

He's yelling at them on the surface and, internally, trying to figure out what he did wrong. Did they need more fertilizer or less? More water, more sun, and when? How did he not see the yellow spot coming?! <insert negative self-thoughts as a result of this here>

Obviously, not super-healthy, right?

The concept of 'sometimes, plants just get yellow leaves and one or two here or there is not a big problem'? That is difficult for Crowley, just as the concept that, sometimes, a person is not going to be able to judge every single situation perfectly and most mistakes there are not a big deal, is also difficult for him and people like him who have experienced trauma and have a lot of self-doubt as a result.

All this need for a sense of control over himself is also what makes the show's several references to Crowley enjoying Aziraphale periodically restraining him in bed such a big deal. The level of trust it takes for that to be even attempted, let alone enjoyable, for someone who has been raped is enormous. Sex, as a whole, can get understandably complicated for rape survivors. There's this bit o'meta about all that mindful sushi, if looking at that aspect of this story is of interest to you.

Right, so, all of this control-seeking, hypervigilant, self-doubting behavior also causes very high levels of anxiety in survivors. As would make sense, right, because if you're worried that you're missing something, you're attempting to be hyperaware of everything, all the time, in an effort to not be blindsided and harmed, and that gets stressful.

To give you an example of how used to Crowley having periods of high anxiety like this Aziraphale is, look no further than The Meeting Ball, when Aziraphale initially failed to see one example of Crowley's high anxiety actually being more warranted than just alarmist, simply because he's so used to Crowley's default state, especially of late, being something is wrong.

Aziraphale overlooks the possibility of Crowley being right about this danger because Aziraphale is going through his own stuff on this night but also because he's so used to Crowley being constantly jumpy and worried about everything that it's gotten to a point that his default response is to just try to help Crowley calm down because, nine times out of ten, there's no real, actual danger.

Aziraphale thinks Crowley's just nervous about the party so he's just like ok tell me what's upsetting you and I'll listen and we can talk but let's dance while we talk. He flirts with him and tries to get him to eat a vol-au-vent during The Meeting Ball because talking with him, hearing his worries, and then offering him reassurance and affection and trying to help him calm down by making sure he's not spiraling worse from low blood sugar and the like is Aziraphale's (genuinely helpful and effective) go-to strategy.

In Aziraphale's defense? Crowley's like this all the time and most of the time, he's grossly over-estimating the danger because he's anxious, so it's more often than not the case that Crowley is just overly-cautious rather than that something is genuinely wrong. Aziraphale tries to just provide Crowley the reassurance that Crowley seeks from him that they are safe (while making sure that they genuinely are safe) and to help him with perspective.

These same people who are survivors, though? They can be very, very different in behavior when they are in a situation where they aren't being triggered as much by their PTSD.

They can be patient, kind, thoughtful, and great at big picture thinking and managing life when they are in a situation that is not triggering. They can be wonderful friends and partners and, maybe because of being exceptionally in tune to noticing trauma in others, they can also be really exceptional at helping loved ones manage their own dark stuff, as we've seen Crowley show time and again with Aziraphale.

The key thing here is that they're at their best when they're not in a situation where they're being triggered by the things they're trying to manage themselves. When those things are overwhelming them, it's going to be pretty much all they can deal with or think about until the situation becomes manageable for them.

This is basically the state of things for Crowley for much of S2 and in his interactions with Gabriel, which we're on the scenic route to here, I promise. 😉

When triggered by something that they experience as a threat to their safety, many survivors can experience a panicked kind of tunnel vision. Their only response becomes about getting as far away from the threat as possible, as fast as is possible.

Logic tends to fall by the wayside in these situations. Crowley's default response of running away to Alpha Centauri whenever he thinks Hell is after them is the most trauma response that has ever trauma responsed. It makes absolutely no logical sense. Heaven and Hell can absolutely find them in the star system they all share. The reason why Crowley chooses this as his default is because, in reality, there is nowhere for him to run to escape Heaven and Hell and his default response is to just get as far away as possible.

It's to literally put as much distance between himself and potential harm as possible, as quickly as possible, even if he cannot ultimately outrun it. This fear response is the body flooding itself with cortisol and other stress hormones screaming we are under attack! at the first sign of danger as its strategy for keeping another attack from happening. It's an almost animal instinct to run for safety.

To Crowley, safety is Aziraphale and a threat from Heaven or Hell looming means he goes into a state of tunnel vision where all he can think about is keeping Aziraphale and himself safe in whatever way he can manage. In S1, that meant getting Aziraphale into the car and apparently Chitty Chitty Bang Banging it to Alpha Centauri-- just getting as far from pain as possible with the person who makes him feel safe and whom he cannot bear the thought of losing.

Did it make any sense? Good heavens, no. Neither did asking Aziraphale for holy water in a panic in the public park where the listening ducks had ears back in 1862, which is a very similar kind of PTSD-induced panic but one that can see a survivor run in a different way, which I looked at over here in this post about insurance, should you be interested.

The problem is that a person that is panicking cannot think clearly and so isn't super-great at making a strategic plan to overcome whatever the threat actually is-- presuming there even is a legitimate threat.

While Crowley is under threat from Hell in the Alpha Centauri scene in S1, he's panicked and all he can really think to do is to get safe which, for Crowley, means getting Aziraphale and getting as far away from the danger as possible, even if that isn't a great plan for actually eliminating the overall threat of the danger itself.

This is basically the same thing as his initial response to Gabriel in S2.

Crowley has legitimate reason to be afraid of Gabriel after S1 and his panic over seeing him again in the bookshop is understandable and no joke. Good Omens, though, is good at finding the humor in the darkness, and Crowley's outsized response to Jim as the scenes continue gets amusing, even as the reasons for it are dark.

When Aziraphale first saw Gabriel at the door, he was obviously and understandably surprised and anxious. He was able, though, to evaluate the situation rationally and make decisions based on the facts in front of him because his own traumatic experiences are a bit different from Crowley's. Aziraphale does not have rape-related PTSD. This is why Aziraphale is able to look at Gabriel from the get-go, see that he doesn't pose a threat to them, and begin to consider that he and Crowley and Gabriel might all need one another.

Crowley takes longer to get to this place because he takes one look at Gabriel, whom he believes that he last saw trying to kill Aziraphale and who is now in the middle of their bookshop safe space, and his PTSD goes into overdrive.

What makes this funny is also what emphasizes the horror show that is living with PTSD that Crowley exemplifies, which is that Gabriel in 2.01 could not possibly be less threatening.

He's wearing a tartan toga and not much else when Crowley first sees him. (Aziraphale was really hoping that would help mitigate the alarm for Crowley lol.) Gabriel's dusting the books. He's super-friendly. We're all calling him Jim now, for whatever reason. He is, quite clearly, having a complete and utter mental health breakdown, and is in desperate need of help. It doesn't take much to see that, all things in the past aside, their naked man friend is not really especially scary-- a fact that becomes more evident with each passing moment.

Crowley's response to this, though, is if Aziraphale had invited Hannibal Lecter over for dinner. His initial response is what, of course?

To get as far from Gabriel as he can!

The immediate response to this from Crowley is just basically running for the private room in the back of the bookshop, shutting himself inside it with Aziraphale, and looking at the closed door with an eye so watchful that you'd think he expects Gabriel to Kool-Aid Man through it at any moment.

Crowley is literally incapable of thinking logically at this point. His mind and his body are screaming at him that this situation is unsafe because Crowley's trauma over the body swap in Heaven is such that he's never been able to think rationally about it or about how he and Aziraphale have managed to elude deception all this time. He's never considered the idea that Gabriel is as trapped as they are and was flanked by other angels Up there and so had to lay it on thick or risk death himself.

To Crowley for most of S2, Gabriel is a villain and that's the end of it, and he's certainly not capable of thinking this through right after he sees him in the bookshop again, as he's triggered to the moon and back. Nuanced thinking-- the stuff that big-picture thinkers like Crowley are usually very good at doing-- goes out the window when they're triggered.

The only person that Crowley feels truly safe with is Aziraphale. Aziraphale has earned a level of trust with Crowley where, even in Crowley's most panicked state, it's never just his own safety he's concerned with but his and Aziraphale's. He can't run without Aziraphale because he can't live without Aziraphale. Aziraphale is the only one who gets to see him at his worst with managing his PTSD because he's the only one Crowley truly trusts.

Gabriel is in the bookshop, though, so it's not like they can run from him because this is their house 😂 so Crowley's PTSD pivots it to become that if they can't get away from Gabriel here, then they need to get Gabriel away from them.

To Crowley, Gabriel is immediately a threat and one that needs to be gotten as far away from him, Aziraphale, and their bookshop safe space as quickly as possible.

This is how Crowley's initial plan for how to deal with Gabriel is the absolutely hilariously ineffectual "we could drive him out to the middle of nowhere and leave him for dead!"

Right, and what's the plan for when the angels show up at the bookshop looking for him, Crowley? Do we also have a strategy for how we're going to feel about leaving a guy who can't remember his own name in the cold on the side of the road when we're a soft-hearted, Jemimah's-pot-saving, Richard-Curtis-film-devotee marshmallow? No? Of course not. 😂

There's no logic here. This is an ineffectual as running to Alpha Centauri. He's pacing and wide-eyed and not even really trying with the PTSD response at this point, completely impervious to Aziraphale's more rational honey, I don't think the amnesiac guy in the towel is going to kill us opinion of the situation.

What Crowley needs is for Gabriel to be nowhere near him and the precious, peaceful, fragile existence he's carved out for himself here, right?

And, ouch, Crowley, when it's clear that Aziraphale is right-- this existence (really: a life) is one that they've carved out for themselves, together. Crowley is choosing, though, to respond as if Aziraphale isn't listening to to his need for safety when, in reality, Aziraphale wouldn't have allowed Gabriel to stay if he hadn't deemed him safe to both he and Crowley. Crowley is scared so he's saying I can't be around him, I can't deal with this. It's my life, not ours, if you're letting him stay here, which leads to their argument.

PTSD is hard to manage, especially when new triggers come up unexpectedly out of nowhere during a time that is already been difficult, and we've been given some indications elsewhere in the season that Crowley's been struggling of late, like the fact that he's having an existential crisis on the park bench at the start of 2.01, among other things. Crowley can usually can do better than this with managing his PTSD and he fails at it while Aziraphale winds up more successful with his own trauma-adjacent issues during their argument, resulting it being Crowley who is apologizing later on. Aziraphale understands, though, and lets it go with the apology because he knows how difficult this is to deal with, especially when they are not fully free of Heaven and Hell.

The reason why Crowley cannot look at the Jim situation in the first moments he's informed of it with anything resembling logic has nothing to do with Aziraphale or Gabriel, though.

It's entirely because Crowley struggles to be able to trust himself to be able to judge what this situation actually is.

Being always worried that there's something going unseen that could lead to harm for themselves or the people they love leads PTSD sufferers to feel a lot of stress and anxiety. This is especially true because, to an extent, missing something will eventually be a self-fulfilling prophecy at some point, just because no one sees everything clearly all the time.

Everyone misjudges situations at times or doesn't see what a person was trying to say or do. Not all of these are five alarm fire situations but no one gets it right all the time and, when that happens to someone who has PTSD, it can worsen self-doubt issues.

The problem for people with PTSD is that, sometimes, worsening self-doubt issues can snowball. If they miss something and that worsens the self-doubt, they might then wind up in a panicked tunnel vision state of mind. This heightened level of panic might cause them to keep making mistakes and misinterpreting situations or intent with other people, causing more errors in judgement. It hammers away at their ability to feel like they can trust themselves to accurately judge situations and keep themselves safe, worsening their state of mind. This happens with Crowley in S2 and it's actually still on-going heading into The Finale because he's missing something massive in The Final 15, which is you can read more about in The Kiss, if you're interested.

Crowley already had been suffering for awhile ahead of S2 with the loss of control and feeling of having misjudged a situation in S1 that led to what he thought at the time was the loss of both the bookshop and Aziraphale. This was bad enough but, then, something else happened in 2.01 that caused the self-doubt to get really bad for the rest of the season and that affected his interactions with Gabriel.

That thing was his conversation with Beez about The Book of Life.

When Beez brings up The Book of Life, Crowley has an immediate answer. He has a memory of him and Beez having made up The Book of Life to tease more impressionable angels. He has a memory that Beez does not and Beez's expression says that they think that Crowley might be correct. (We see their expression but they are angled away from Crowley, who does not.)

Beez is embarrassed to think that they've been afraid of a thing that is something of their own making and not real. A thing that is of someone's own making and only as real a threat as they allow it to be?

That's also true of anxiety.

The Book of Life being something that Crowley and Beez once made up as angels that reflected their anxiety over living in Heaven becoming something that they convince themselves is a real threat is a plot that works basically the same way as anxiety does and emphasizes that anxiety as part of both of their stories.

Beez's embarrassment over having believed this results in them doubling down over it being true. Crowley could have decided that he was sure about his own memories but, instead, he chose to default to Beez, assuming that they would know more from running Hell and that it must be him who was incorrect.

There's that self-doubt again.

He trusted Beez over his own mind because he doubts his ability to accurately parse his own memories at times-- which is to say that he doubts himself.

The irony is that it's this lack of self-trust that causes him to doubt his own mind that leads him to believe in The Book of Life and not mention it to Aziraphale all season, in a misguided effort to protect him and not give more to worry about, that means that Crowley is so worried about The Book of Life that he can't see what is actually happening in The Final 15.

So, after talking with Beez, Crowley is now even more anxious, because he thinks that they're all going to die if they get caught helping Gabriel. He absolutely knows that helping Gabriel is the right thing to do but living with the up-and-down of PTSD is this level of exhausting:

Here's where we can add in the extra-stressful layer to helping Gabriel here, which is that Crowley has been, more or less, living in the bookshop. He and Aziraphale both get "plenty of use" out of it and various hints-- the book he gives Muriel being likely his own; the fact that Gabriel appears to be wearing Crowley's tie and shoes later on, etc., a bunch of other, little things-- emphasize that the bookshop is, unofficially, also Crowley's house.

Aziraphale's got Gabriel staying in a bedroom in the residence upstairs and it's shown a bunch of times to be next door to the room at the top of the stairs, the door to which stays shut all season but is, more than likely, Crowley and Aziraphale's bedroom. Gabriel's presence in the shop to Crowley means that he and Aziraphale are risking Gabriel getting the impression that they are a couple. (Like seeing them for three seconds together wouldn't give someone this impression lol.) It might not matter that much to Jim who doesn't know what the fuck is going on lol but Crowley's more concerned about what happens if the person he thinks is Gabriel suddenly pops out of Jim. What happens if Jim's amnesia disappears and the nice dude becomes this evil person that Crowley has convinced himself that Gabriel must be?

Crowley was never really that safe in his flat but he doesn't have that to go to anymore because, ya know, kipping with Shax around isn't the most zen way to unwind. He hasn't told Aziraphale for reasons looked at in that The Kiss meta linked above but part of why Aziraphale hasn't realized it is because Crowley is just in the shop most nights until the early morning hours. He leaves before dawn in an effort to keep them from being caught. The bookshop is basically Crowley's house, too, so having Gabriel stay there means them figuring out what to do about the fact that they've been trying to hide their relationship for thousands of years.

Crowley is having difficulty processing the idea that, amnesia aside, Jim is Gabriel, and that Gabriel came to him and Aziraphale for help. Aziraphale is more capable of seeing that he and Crowley are the ones in control of the situation, which he helps Crowley to see a bit more once Crowley has calmed down from the initial shock of it and come back to the shop, worried about The Book of Life threat and feeling guilty about their argument and, especially, about saying that he's leaving Aziraphale on his own, when he knows that's as triggering for Aziraphale as all of this Gabriel stuff has been for Crowley himself.

As Crowley sees a little more of Jim and how really vulnerable he is ("Hello! Where did you come from?... Can I go to the outside?" lol)... and as Aziraphale gives Crowley a task-- something he can do to help and to feel in control of what's happening... Crowley gets a little bit more comfortable with what's happening, if still nowhere near relaxed about it.

Crowley is shown to be very unsure about Aziraphale acting in a way that is normal for them when in the shop with him around Gabriel-- mainly, with Aziraphale getting so near to him and moving to touch him in a way that, if Crowley hadn't backed up, would have been ridiculously couple-y. Crowley isn't sure what the whole deal with Jim really is at this point and he's not sure that he wants Gabriel to see anything that suggests that he's Aziraphale's partner, even if that's exactly what he is.

The irony here is that Gabriel's first scene in the first episode-- the one in the sushi restaurant that is cut into off of Crowley being assaulted-- shows that Gabriel had absolutely no reason for being there in the restaurant that night other than to try to help Crowley by telling Aziraphale what was happening and then trying to tell Aziraphale that he'd cover for him and Crowley. He told Aziraphale that he was under special assignment to watch Crowley (which, as Aziraphale pointed out in the scene, is just Aziraphale's usual job lol) and to "keep him under close observation." (Interesting, doctoral choice of phrasing from Gabriel there.) He was giving Aziraphale an excuse-- if you get caught, we can say that I gave you this assignment and I'll do what I can to protect you both is essentially the message.

Gabriel's entire reason for being in the sushi restaurant was because his informant (Beez) was upset over not being able to keep Crowley out of Armageddon and Gabriel's response to that was to try to help Crowley and Aziraphale by trying to tell Aziraphale listen, I'll take care of Heaven. You just take care of Crowley. His very first scene in the show is him trying to do what he could to help Crowley but Crowley and Aziraphale don't really see this and remain afraid of him when, in reality, 1.01 suggests that Gabriel and Beez have been trying to protect them all along and are the strongest allies they both have.

In S2, Aziraphale is in a more logical place. Gabriel has amnesia, showed up naked, needs help. Even if he recovers, he owes them one, and he also protected Aziraphale from Sandalphon in S1. They can trust him and they are the ones in control of the situation. Crowley manages to listen to Aziraphale's idea, though, as he's calmed down a little bit by seeing again just how unthreatening Jim is and by Aziraphale taking charge of what they can do and giving Crowley something specific that he can do to help protect all of them.

Aziraphale all smiles at seeing Crowley grinning and hippity-hopping for the first time since the whole mess started...

Aziraphale knows Crowley well and he knows that, sometimes, Crowley needs to prove to himself that he can handle things and tries to find ways that he can help by having Crowley do something to help prove to himself that he can trust himself the way that Aziraphale trusts him.

Aziraphale's confidence in Crowley helps Crowley trust himself more, as we saw on full display in S2 in one of the biggest moments in the series:

Chief among Aziraphale's many reasons for being the one of the two of them to go to Edinburgh is that he wanted to help Crowley by giving him control over the bookshop and the Jim situation.

By trusting Crowley to mind the shop and care for Gabriel while he was gone, Aziraphale was reiterating that he trusted Crowley to judge accurately any situations, including those with the angels, that might come up. He was trusting him to manage his PTSD, in spite of the struggles with it that Crowley had been having that week, because he trusts Crowley, which is a reminder that Crowley needs a lot and that can be very helpful in boosting his confidence in his ability to trust himself.

Aziraphale also knew that Crowley was tired and didn't want him to feel kicked out of his home. Aziraphale didn't know that Crowley was living out of his car but he didn't know that because Crowley was just in the bookshop so often that it meant that Aziraphale hadn't noticed that Crowley didn't have his flat. Crowley had low key moved in as much as that was possible for the two of them. He was used to sleeping in their bed and being in the bookshop which, even as it had been a bit stressful because of the fire, was still the place that made him feel the safest.

Aziraphale wanted him to get some rest and relax for a bit in the shop and was hoping that, since he was charging Crowley with Gabriel's care, it might cause them to talk a bit more, which Aziraphale wisely knew would be good for both of them.

All of that was a good plan but, as we see, though, Crowley's response to Gabriel starts to go up and down during the rest of the week. Why?

One of the reasons is a series of things, most of them not terribly consequential, but which add up to Crowley having one of those weeks we all have from time to time when new information is causing us to feel like we don't know much of anything or can't do anything right.

Crowley is the one who knows popular music but he doesn't know this "Everyday" song so he's not much help with that mystery. He bungles his Vavoom attempts for Maggie & Nina by collapsing the awning with too much rain. He had absolutely no idea that his old pal, master spy/brandy smuggler/brains behind the 1810 Clerkenwell Diamond Robbery/all around legend, Jane Austen, wrote books, let alone classic, romantic ones.

These are also nods to how Crowley's missing memories means he's fuzzy on the origins of things. "Everyday" is one of the foundational songs of rock 'n roll and Jane Austen is the same for modern romantic stories but Crowley knows better what came after-- Queen, Richard Curtis films, etc.. It emphasizes that he feels more sure of his memories since his fall but, because he lived through these eras, not knowing things from them are then also examples to him of times when he wasn't fully aware of his surroundings and missed things.

What unsettles him is that Aziraphale knew that Jane wrote books so it's overall a case of Crowley having missed something important. It's something that, in this case, everyone seems to have known but him, which is the most unsettling kind of thing for someone dealing with PTSD. It's not the end of the world but it didn't help his already bad week.

Another thing the different perspective on Jane Austen did is emphasize how Crowley having to deal with trauma causes him to move through the world differently than other people. The way that other people commonly experience things aren't always his experience, even if he can intellectually understand theirs. This is just a fact of life for people who have been through things like what Crowley has but, when a reminder of it is mixed into a time when the self-doubt is especially high, it can worsen a sense of being 'other' from other people, and worsen PTSD.

In the middle of all of this are also Crowley's interactions with Shax. Shax is a devout diabolical minister and the closer she gets to figuring out that he and Aziraphale are a couple, the more Crowley's stress is compounded as his usual fear of Satan turning up increases.

Shax is also a constant reminder of Satan-- one that has an unnerving habit of just popping up places and being far too close for comfort. She doesn't hide her attraction to him and he doesn't want anything to do with her. He's balancing that disinterest with trying to keep her from figuring out about Aziraphale. He's technically not a demon anymore but Hell is still following him around via Shax and Hell is, fundamentally, Satan. She's the inability to escape reminders of trauma that can come up in different periods and worsen PTSD.

Then, there's the bigger problem: Crowley kinda likes Jimbriel.

He is relating to Gabriel. He has been the whole time. An amnesiac former angel leaning on Aziraphale for safety and comfort while struggling with trauma and memories... yeah, Crowley knows nothing about how that goes. 😂 Gabriel's struggle with his memory was very familiar for Crowley and he empathized enough to, in his own way, try to help-- revealing another example of just how hard Crowley is on himself in the process.

What's causing complications for Crowley is that he both likes and sympathizes with Jim. Crowley knows that the most logical answer here is that it's really that Jim and Gabriel are the same person. Crowley is being confronted with the idea that maybe this scary monster he's built up in his mind really isn't a scary monster and he can barely make sense of that.

Crowley has not previously put a lot of thought into the idea that Gabriel has been as trapped as he and Aziraphale have been and that he might have had to act a role to survive, in a way that Crowley himself often does and did in the past. He's tended to see Gabriel as a threat and nothing else... but the Jimbriel currently driving him insane rearranging the bookshop is anything but a threat.

Then, while Aziraphale is in Edinburgh, it's just Crowley and Gabriel for a time, and Crowley's perception that Gabriel is not a threat just keeps increasing. Gabriel just looks more like walking depression, struggling as Crowley himself has done with his sense of self, and trying his best to be helpful to those around him.

He's kind to Crowley, eager to help with whatever Crowley is up to, and not at all threatening. There's no sense from Crowley that this is all some master plan where Gabriel dons a Christmas jumper and earns their trust, only to slit their throats in their sleep. He's just a lost guy who needs their help.

Jimbriel, it turns out, is fucking nice. He's kind to Crowley and appreciative of his help. Crowley has no idea what to do with this. This messes with Crowley's perception of what he thought reality was so it's confusing for him.

Because Aziraphale has tasked him with managing this situation and given him reassurance that he can, Crowley has dived into not letting Aziraphale down with it. He's gotten a bookseller outfit on, he's keeping the place somewhat organized so that Aziraphale won't lose it too much over Jim's reorg project 😂 (really, probably, just pulling his own books out of Jim's piles because a traumatized demon can only give up so much control at once here lol) and he's being generally pleasant to Jimbriel, whom he'd rather, at this stage, die than admit he kind of likes.

He's cautious about things but he's also relaxing a little more around Jim, which is scary for him because what if he's misjudged this?! But, Aziraphale wants him to try and all objective evidence points to Aziraphale's assessment being correct and Jim not being at threat, so Crowley tries, as he supposes that there are worse things than having an archangel owe you a favor, even if Crowley is still not at all for this situation as a whole because the wolves keep circling.

Not only is Crowley worried about the angels and demons who are trying to find Gabriel getting them erased from The Book of Life that he's convinced himself is real, Crowley now has the new problem of ugh kinda caring about what happens to Jim. Goddamned feelings. 😂 To be sure, he'd still chuck Jim off a bridge if it meant keeping himself and Aziraphale from harm, but Crowley's warming up to him a bit.

Early on, he's more amusing himself than anything, when explaining the plan to make Maggie and Nina Vavoom to Gabriel. In that moment, Gabriel can't remember anything so the concept of The Vavoom is new information to him but it's funny to Crowley that it would be because it's something of a repeat of how he and Aziraphale once fooled Gabriel to save Job and Sitis' kids off of what, essentially, was Gabriel's lack of information about human sex.

There's an argument to be made that Gabriel let himself play the fool in that scene but, even if you think he genuinely did not know then that all human babies are not made and birthed through ribs, he certainly has acquired that information since, among other scenes, that dry, "it's a miracle he hasn't spotted you yet" to Aziraphale in the sushi restaurant scene was overflowing with sexual innuendo.

Crowley chats on, using words from his and Aziraphale's language around Gabriel in the vavoom explanation scene to ease his stress and have something amusing to tell Aziraphale when he comes back. He's still snarky in the other scenes ("well-observed") but he also shows genuine empathy and provides calm, patient answers to Gabriel, especially in the gravity scene.

He sympathizes with Gabriel and helps him try to process what he's going through. He's seeing Gabriel as a person for the first time in doing this and the image Crowley has of him is changing, which, as we've said, is overall positive, but also compounds anxiety in the short-term because he cannot find a path to reconciling it with the past in his mind.

The self-doubt doesn't disappear but he's gathering some more information about the situation to inform his decisions the longer he's around Gabriel... and the longer he is, the more worried about all of it-- the threat of the situation to him and Aziraphale, but also now the danger to Gabriel himself-- Crowley becomes.

Still, he had every opportunity to betray Gabriel during the time that Aziraphale was away and he didn't. He could have chucked him at Shax more than once, if he was of mind to do so, but he didn't because Crowley has a good heart and he knew that Gabriel needed them and that helping him was the right thing to do.

The more Crowley saw about what was happening to Gabriel-- especially the eerie "there will come a tempest" moment when Gabriel isn't even really Gabriel and can't remember what just happened and then is in a state of distress afterwards-- the more he wanted to help him and the more Crowley believed that whatever was happening to Gabriel was genuine... but that didn't stop the larger threat to Aziraphale that concerned Crowley more.

At the same time as he's making sure that Jim is safe in the shop, he's also then turning around and growling at him that Aziraphale is risking his existence to help save him-- something which Gabriel, without his memories, doesn't really have any concept of, which just frustrates Crowley because it's unsatisfying to vent fear at someone who really doesn't have the ability in that moment to understand your fear. It looked and sounded like anger but it was really fear.

By the time Aziraphale returns from Edinburgh, it's first thing on Thursday morning, and Gabriel's been in the bookshop since Monday morning. At this point, after the last few days and what Crowley's seen, it would be pretty absurd to still think that Gabriel himself poses a threat to them, and Crowley knows that's true. He knows that, if Gabriel were there to harm them, he would have done so already. He knows that if Gabriel wanted to kill them, there would have been no better time to start that then when Aziraphale was gone but, lo and behold, Crowley is still alive and breathing.

Gabriel was very scary while Aziraphale was gone, doing things like looking sad and lost, sleeping, rearranging books, and, occasionally, singing to himself. Very frightening lol.

That said? Crowley's self-doubt is such that, while all of the evidence that Gabriel is not a threat is overwhelming at this point, he cannot shake the fear that he's misjudged this, and he's terrified about not getting it right because the stakes are so high.

Crowley wants to trust in Aziraphale's assessment, as he always does when he's not sure of his own, but what if they're wrong? What if he fails to see some flaw in Aziraphale's assessment that he normally would have noticed if he weren't so anxious and that proves to be their fatal undoing? What if Aziraphale's got this backwards? Then, if Crowley doesn't get it right, he'll be failing to protect him. He'll have been a bad partner to him and, atop that, they could wind up dead.

Aziraphale didn't just meet Crowley yesterday, though, and he knows how Crowley's mind works. When they start to talk about this at Marguerite's, Crowley fails to tell Aziraphale the big threat that's on his mind-- The Book of Life. I remain pretty convinced that if Crowley had chosen to bring this up, instead of trying to manage all of this on his own, that Aziraphale could have reassured Crowley that Crowley's initial memories were correct and it wasn't a thing. If that had happened, The Final 15 never would have happened the way it did because Crowley wouldn't have been so distracted from The Book of Life that he failed to see what the threat really was.

But, in that moment, while he didn't tell Aziraphale about his concerns over The Book of Life, he did talk with him about how he was feeling about the Gabriel situation.

In the scene, Crowley admits to being awake the prior night worrying about the Gabriel situation. (And also likely because he missed Aziraphale.) He's self-deprecating as he expresses concern about what might happen if Gabriel "wakes up" and about the possibility of Gabriel "faking it"-- which they both know isn't really a thing at this point. Crowley turns the concerns into a flirtation with Aziraphale, needing a moment of play, and jokes that Gabriel could smite him, before flirting over the past tense of the verb to smite... the most Crowley and Aziraphale flirtation possible. 😊

Crowley knows how absurd the ideas he's saying sound aloud but he's saying them aloud anyway-- giving voice to some of his most anxious thoughts, which is a good thing-- because he needs reassurance from Aziraphale. It speaks to how much he trusts him and how healthy they are in being pretty open about talking about how they feel.

Crowley needs Aziraphale to tell him that it's okay and that they're safe and to just flirt with him a little and get him out of his head and Aziraphale does that. It's the same thing as this:

Crowley trusts Aziraphale and he sometimes just needs Aziraphale to tell him when he's going around the bend with something. Part of that is running his most anxious thoughts about the flagpole to Aziraphale and seeing if Aziraphale thinks that they sound like legitimate problems or more like the product of Crowley's anxiety talking. Crowley usually already knows the answer to this-- and he definitely did in the smitten scene-- but it's comforting to have Aziraphale tell him in that fond way of his that it's all alright and that he doesn't need to worry so much.

Aziraphale is very gentle in his response when he gives Crowley that reassurance. He teases him a little-- saying that the appropriate past tense for what Crowley would be should Gabriel smite him would be 'smitten', which is the one that corresponds to being infatuated, teasing Crowley a bit because you know he'll never miss an opportunity not to after Crowley said Gabriel was beautiful on their date in 1827 😂 -- but the sweet part is actually the wordplay in the soft "you're being silly."

The tone alone is sensitive enough but the choice of the word silly is an interesting one, especially since they're wordplay-flirting in that moment. It contains sill, a word that means threshold, usually of a door or a window. There's a level of humor to this because it's saying that Crowley is being silly about Gabriel-- about who they've let in past the threshold of the bookshop door-- and that all holds true. There's also, though, that the context of what Crowley's saying in this scene-- about the reassurance for his anxiety that he's looking for-- especially when coupled with remembering Aziraphale's "you can call me an old silly but I think The Devil is coming" from back in S1 suggest that silly is an already-existing PTSD-related word to them.

Aziraphale saying that Crowley is being silly is meaning that Aziraphale's is trying to gently say that he thinks that the anxious thoughts are related to Crowley's trauma, and the threat is more of a perceived one than a real one. They're things related to Crowley's own threshold that has been forcibly crossed in the past, leaving him wracked with self-doubt and anxiety.

Aziraphale's gentle "you're being silly" is a way of reassuring Crowley that, yes, the threatening things he's suggesting that might happen with Gabriel are really out there and very unlikely to occur and that this is the PTSD talking.

Aziraphale then asks has Crowley considered just talking to Gabriel? You know, like how he is talking to Aziraphale in that moment? Just openly telling him what's bothering him and going from there? That might be a healthy option? 😲😂

This is a great idea but the for the fact that Crowley is a little drunk and then decides to basically drink the rest of the bottle of wine before having the conversation in question but we're at least sort of headed in the right direction!

Crowley decides to confront Jim-- who remembers precious little about prior events so, you know, really satisfying confrontation for Crowley here lol-- about that whole "shut your stupid mouth and die" business back in S1.

This is the big problem for Crowley-- the one thing he's having trouble getting around. Jim, the last few days? A pleasure. A fellow snarky, fucked up, gent that Crowley wouldn't have an issue becoming eternal friends with. His impression of His Royal Smugness from back in S1, though? A little lacking.

Note the emphasis in the "And I do remember..." as he confronts Gabriel in the moment above. It shows how the conversation with Beez is still bothering Crowley and how that is worsening the self-doubt.

What Crowley is sure he does remember correctly, though, is the "shut your stupid mouth and die" scene from S1 and we know he's correct in doing so because we were there with him. We can contextualize it better than Crowley can because we've seen more of Gabriel during the story and, also, we aren't so directly traumatized by this that we can't consider other reasons for his behavior, like that he was also trapped and being watched by other angels.

This is where, even though the biggest sticking point for Crowley here is this moment of Gabriel's behavior from S1, Crowley's response to Gabriel is still really not fundamentally about Gabriel himself so much. How so?

It's because Gabriel doesn't mean to be, of course, but he is, unintentionally, the biggest, possible trigger there is for a lot of Crowley's PTSD. Why him, more than anyone else?

Well, not for nothing, but the last time Crowley trusted an attractive Supreme Archangel? It didn't exactly go well... Gabriel has been the Supreme Archangel since the only other, prior one fell and that other one was Crowley's abuser.

Gabriel has moved into the bookshop showing similar symptoms that Crowley himself did after his fall, unintentionally bringing all that up for Crowley, and, atop that, Gabriel had held the same position of power that Lucifer did. By pointing out across several scenes in S2 that Crowley is attracted to Gabriel (even if that's going nowhere as Crowley's a one angel kinda fella), it's also emphasizing the semi-conscious parallels in Crowley's mind between the powerful ex he once trusted who then harmed him and the handsome Supreme Archangel Crowley isn't sure he can trust but that, bizarrely, seems actually trustworthy.

The last time Crowley listened to his friends and supported an attractive person who seemed like they were going to treat him well and that everyone said could be trusted, Crowley wound up damned for eternity as a result. He wound up a rape survivor.

When Crowley and his wine go to talk to Gabriel, what they're really saying under the surface of all of that anger is that he is terrified that the Gabriel he saw in 1.06 is not a construct, like what Aziraphale thinks, but the real person-- that Gabriel is cruel and that the Jim thing is the charade, not the whole Archangel Fucking Gabriel thing.

What Crowley is really saying is that he doesn't know how to get it but he needs proof that Jimbriel won't hurt them.

Aziraphale wasn't the one there in 1.06; Crowley was. Crowley can, and has, heard Aziraphale's opinion on it, but he thinks he knows what he saw, and it's what he thinks he saw that is keeping him from fully agreeing that Aziraphale is correct and Jim can be trusted.

Crowley is too traumatized to really pull back, think about it a bit more, and understand what he saw, though. He's having trouble recognizing Gabriel with his trauma blinders on but it's really, really hard to take them off when, even though Gabriel had no intention of doing so, this situation is triggering everything for Crowley.

What Crowley hasn't given a lot of thought to is that Gabriel had two other angels standing there, including Sandalphon, whom we already saw earlier in S1 that he didn't trust at all. That he was in trouble with The Metatron over the failure to start Armageddon and that he didn't yet know that The Metatron wouldn't send him to Hell.

Gabriel was a dick, yes, but he was fucking terrified of falling and, even worse, at failing the angels he had been trying to protect, who would be left with no one really fighting for him without them.

Crowley's never really considered what Gabriel meant by don't talk to me about the greater good, sunshine.

Gabriel was also angry at being put in the position of it being Aziraphale-- the only angel he somewhat regularly saw whom he really felt was good and trustworthy and the closest thing to a friend, besides Beez, that he had-- versus the thousands of angels that he felt it was his duty as the Supreme Archangel to try to protect and keep safe.

How many times has Crowley put on a show around the demons to seem like he's one of them to try to stay alive? More times than he can count, right? But what Crowley hasn't been doing with Gabriel is consider that he was in the same kind of boat up in Heaven-- that "shut your stupid mouth and die already" is Gabriel acting like the angel that Sandalphon and The Metatron would think was on their side but that angel is not the person that Gabriel really is-- Jim is.

Crowley's basically projecting a version of his own fall over what's happening with Aziraphale and Gabriel here and has been for most of the season. He's worried that if he gives in and trusts Gabriel that Gabriel will turn out to be like Lucifer and Aziraphale will be hurt. It's basically trauma that is keeping Crowley from seeing that these two situations really are not the same at all.

Part of Crowley brings up the body swap plot to Gabriel in the hopes that he'll see Gabriel "crack", which will expose the whole Jim thing as a fraud, and then Crowley will have a reason to just say that Gabriel is like Lucifer and get Aziraphale away from him. It's the simple solution that Crowley knows isn't coming because he already knows, deep down, that Gabriel isn't Lucifer, but he feels he basically has to try and test him.

When he does, Gabriel is just continually nice. He expresses gratitude at how kind Aziraphale has been to him. He is-- to Crowley, wonderfully and infuriatingly at once-- patient and understanding about the fact that Crowley is drunk and expressing a lot of anger and hostility towards him. When Crowley says that he's endangering Aziraphale, Gabriel is upset and asks how he can help them.

He's fucking great lol and Crowley, drunk and angry, in one of the darkest moments of the show, tells him to jump out the window. [This is why you don't have intense conversations about trauma with wine involved.]

It's more of a flippant comment because Crowley doesn't actually think that Gabriel will attempt to do it but then he finds himself watching in horror as Gabriel proves that he is so lost and despairing that he would kill himself in an effort to be what the only friends he has needs.

Gabriel, it turns out, would jump out a window to his death without a second thought to keep Aziraphale from harm.

Crowley is shocked out of both his wine haze and his PTSD-related stuff and quickly keeps Gabriel from killing himself.

For the first time, Crowley really sees Gabriel there because this person who just-- really unnecessarily-- tried to sacrifice himself for his friends is, Crowley suddenly realizes, the complete fucking opposite of Satan.

Gabriel is someone who is actually way, way too self-sacrificing but he got there because of how deeply he cares about others and how isolated and lonely he feels. This is someone who has been taught that he exists as a symbol and feels like he's failed to live up to the impossible standards of it. He's struggling and he's depressed. He's not actually a symbol of Heaven; he's a victim and a survivor of it, the way Crowley and Aziraphale themselves are.

He really is Jim, just as Crowley has been seeing him the last few days. Gabriel is Jim. There is no secret evil about to come to the surface here and Crowley knows that for sure now-- he's just horrified that it went that far for him to see that realization.

Crowley's "Well, if you're not really him, what are you?" is such an interesting line. In addition to the idea that if he's not really like what Crowley thought Gabriel was like, there's also an element in there of:

If you're not really like him [Lucifer], then who are you?

It also mirrors Uriel's "What is he?" from the same scene in 1.06 that Crowley had been bringing up to Gabriel here. It's not just *who* someone is but *what* they are. In that way, it's comparing Uriel having her mind blown by what she thought was an angel who was immune to hellfire with Crowley having his mind blown by an angel who he thought was a villain turning out to be just a snarky lovebug.

For Crowley, the rest of this scene is the bigger realization-- the thing that Aziraphale has seen all along, and why he correctly thought that Gabriel and Crowley could become good friends if Crowley could get beyond his trauma to give that a try. The thing Crowley has been trying to avoid seeing, even as Gabriel's struggles over the last week so reminded Crowley of some of his own.

It's that Gabriel isn't just like Lucifer. He's just like Crowley.

As they talk about memory, the more honest and nice to him Gabriel is, the more Crowley feels guilty and terrible for how awful he was when he first came into the room. He came in angry that Gabriel had said terrible things to Aziraphale and then turned around and did basically the same thing to Gabriel. He almost leaves without trying to rectify it but, well...

...he and Aziraphale are quasi-immortal beings with no other friends who aren't human. Jimbriel is still willing to talk to Crowley, even after Crowley went, in his mind, full on embarrassing PTSD anxiety mess on him. He deserves a 'sorry for drunkenly telling you to kill yourself and would you like to be friends forever?' hot chocolate.

Worse to Crowley, even though Jimbriel doesn't remember enough to really understand during this scene why Crowley is Like This, he doesn't let that stop him from being kind and empathetic about it. He responds to Crowley's hot chocolate gesture by reassuring him that he is nice but it's here that Crowley truly adopted Jim forever:

Jimbriel doesn't remember the specifics in this moment but he can recognize in Crowley someone whose sharp edges are an act to cover for how badly they've been hurt. Crowley brings the mug in, holding it from the bottom so that Gabriel can take it from the sides-- and Gabriel does, but from lower than could have. As he takes the hot chocolate and thanks him, Gabriel brushes Crowley's wrist, very gently.

Just as Crowley's hot chocolate gesture is some softness to try to mitigate how harsh he was before and start anew, Jimbriel shows that he has intuited the problem without remembering all the details by touching Crowley lightly, taking intentional care in trying to show Crowley that he doesn't have to doubt that he's safe with him.

They're both saying the same thing:

I won't hurt you.

All that understandable anxiety? All that self-doubt in Crowley, where Gabriel was concerned?

It turns out it was all very silly.

[bunnygirl678]

I keep thinking about a role reversal au for pokespe, like I’ve outlined a fic and write on it when I feel like

But Gold being the one taken by the masked man, Blue not getting attached to him like she did Silver so when she escaped he got left behind. He has Aibo but that’s it.

Silver growing up with his gym leader daddy, a totally normalish life, probably overprotective if there had been an attempted kidnapping, there is no team rocket, just spoiled baby boy with his sneasel.

and maybe he goes to Johto because daddy set him up to fill out the Johto dex, and gold escaped from the mm at like 11, but instead of revenge or finding out his past he just wants to live free, but he sees Silver be given totadile and then how upset cyndaquil is so he takes exbo just to reunite the pair,

But silver who has been sheltered and doesn’t have a lot of friends sees how exbo already loves this boy and decides to invite him to help fill out the dex, silver gets picked up by a car service every afternoon and brought to his nice home, gold always meets up with him in the mornings at a prearranged spot.

So the two of them wander around Johto becoming bffs catching pokemon, somehow it comes out that Gold lives where ever, so sometimes trees, sometimes alleys, his clothes are ratty, Silver starts bringing him lunch, brings him a Viridian city gym promotional blanket (remember there is no tr so Gio is still gym leader)

A snow storm moves in and silver is freaking out, where are you staying this is dangerous, ect, gold is like idk I’ll figure it out, no worries, when silver’s ride comes he grabs gold and pulls him into the car, he’s like I can’t let you freeze to death

Silver shows up at home brining along this dirty very homeless looking boy, Giovanni is like omg wtf ew, I don’t want this street rat around my perfect baby boy, but again, blizzard, and he can’t/wont just leave him out in the cold

Gold has a hot shower, wears some of silvers clothes cause his are dirty and falling apart (and not weather appropriate poor cold baby), he has dinner with Gio and silver, Gio is polite but gold knows what he thinks, he likes hanging with silver so he ignores the judgement

Gio puts gold in a guest room as far from silvers room as he can, everyone goes to bed, due to his terrible childhood, Gold is prone to nightmares, of course he lives wherever so he has always only had himself and Aibo for comfort, he has a nightmare, wakes up crying into Aibo’s fur as his Pokemon tries to comfort him, he’s too far from Silver for him to hear buttttt sneasel hears, goes down the hall and grabs gold and Aibo and guides them to Silver’s room, the boys end up cuddling, after silver wakes up and is like omg what’s wrong

Gio goes to wake silver up and finds the dirty boy curled up with his son, he’s pissed off but again there isn’t much he can do, he ends up moving an extra bed into silvers room but again each morning gold is curled up with silver

silver starts asking about the nightmares, gold notices he doesn’t get them when he sleeps in the same bed as silver, they’re like 11 here so it is innocent just two kids cuddling and being friends, gold finally admits his past, being a child soldier, doesn’t go into the details but it’s obvious it was bad, silver is like omg we need to tell my dad! And gold is like no! He’s scared if they tell an adult somehow he’d be returned to the mm

The storm ends, silver insists that gold continues staying with them, Gio hates it but silver is spoiled af so he gets his way, it’s fine Gio makes comments about gold a lot, subtle digs (ha cause he is a ground type gym leader lmao) gold knows but ignores them, he’s used to it. Knows how people see him

He’s a smart ass and one time he gets himself and silver into trouble, except it was actually golds fault, there was a sign with warnings or something, it comes out that he never learned how to read, thinks silver will judge him, but he’s really kind about it, really cautious about ect

One day when they’re out filling the dex silver just caught a shiny gyarados, the masked man shows up, he’s like oh boy, I’m taking you back, I spent 9 years training you, you think you can leave that easy, then he notices silver, gets excited, I actually wanted you but my attempt was ruined, so I settled for that little brat, he was never that great anyway, but at least I’ve got a gym leaders son now,

Gold is like, ‘hell no you aren’t taking him, do what you want with me but you aren’t going to hurt my friend’ gold uses his new pokemon, fights hard, tells silver to run, tries to buy him time,

Silver doesn’t leave, instead calling his dad in a panic, tells him everything happening and a quick recap, Silver waits for his dad, wants to go back to help gold but gold flipped out begging him to run,

Giovanni arrives in time to see Gold being flung into a tree, he hears MM mention him being a terrible soldier, wasted his time, ect, says he’s going to take silver, gold staggers up, barely standing but says that he won’t let silver be taken, he’d rather die, mm says something about if that’s your wish, gold gets thrown into the lake of rage, as he’s falling he sees Gio, smiles as he sinks his last thought is he’s glad silver will be safe then darkness

Gio fights mm, ends up beating him, cops come, all the while as gold was sinking silver sent out his new gyarados who dives down pulling gold out. Silver tries to do cpr then an ambulance comes they try to ignore gold to help silver who has like a tiny cut,

Silver is just like no save him! They end up taking gold to the hospital, Gio takes silver to get looked at, cops end up finding out about all the kidnappings there were some bodies too (making this darker than canon lol) they go talk to Gio, silver is sitting with gold in his room, trying to help him feel better,

Gio feels like shit cause omg this poor kid and I was an asshole to him, asks cops what is going to happen to gold, is he going to a foster home? Cops are like no, unfortunately there isn’t space, kid is going to stay on the streets, goes in and tells gold he’s going to live with them now

Gold thinks he said it just to appease silver, when they leave to go home, gold is sure he will never get to see silver again, in the morning they don’t show up like promised and gold is just like, well at least I got to have a friend for a while, I’ll cherish it forever, cop comes and is super rude to him but gets his statement, gold has really high anxiety without his pokemon especially Aibo, they’re in a daycare while he’s in hospital and he is not sure how to pay to get them out, he doesn’t have money, let alone pay for the hospital

Mid afternoon the door opens, he assumes it’s the doc about to kick him out realizing he was just street trash, instead it’s silver and Gio, Gio apologizes for being late, cops wanted statements from both of them, he hands gold a bag with a stuffed version of his team, you can’t have them in your room but these guys may help you feel less lonely when visiting hours are over, it’s the first stuffie gold has ever had,

A day or two passed and he gets released, still not convinced he’s going home with Gio, but he does! And suddenly it’s spoil time, like gold has a broken foot, but he’s put in a comfy spot, gets lots of treats, his team with him, silver hangs out, finally feels like he has a home,

Time passes, Gio decides to raise them like brothers, gold gets tutors to help him learn to read and math and stuff, him and Gio end up really close, gold gets into sports with Gio being his coach, silver is happy, he’s training to take over his fathers gym, Gio sets gold up to have a daycare, thinks of him as a son

Gold and silver are besties, at least until they hit puberty, they shift into dating without ever talking about it, one day they’re cuddling like always the next minute they decide to try kissing, nothing changes except now they kiss lol,

They decided to get married really early like 18, it’s fine, gold doesn’t ever really talk about his childhood, they know things were bad but not to the extent, one day gold is walking in the living room holding a glass of water, he trips, glass shatters and he lands on the floor, Giovanni gets up to help him, but all of a sudden gold is in a ball crying begging for Aibo not to be taken away again. Totally inconsolable, silver comes running and they are both like ??

After that they get gold to start letting it out, telling them the things that happened, getting beaten, forced to train till he collapsed, having Aibo taken away as punishment, ect

He has a few more episodes through the years but for the most part he’s happy

Him and silver never split, die of old age ect ect

Idk if anyone is still reading but this is what has been spinning around in my head lately lol

[chaotic-tired-bastard]

Hi !!

I'm such a big fan of your artworks, especially Rozin. (They just mean so much to me, I can't get them out of my mind..) and I would love to ask you this,, What are your thoughts that Rokus' companions in the novel are both Gyatso and Sozin? I would love to see how their characters to be fleshed out and what they were like before especially Sozin. I'm simply so filled with ectasy and excitement for his upcoming book since he's one of my favorites aside from Aang and Kuruk.

Hiiii thank you so much! I’m so glad that you enjoy my art, it always makes me so happy when people tell me that :)

But also I am SO GLAD that you brought this up because there’s so much POTENTIAL THERE. Roku’s gonna be dealing with Sozin, his best friend from childhood, and Gyatso, who is described as a bit of a nuisance but we all know they’re gonna be besties. There’s the potential for an interesting dynamic- Roku's past life as Sozin's BFF competing/conflicting with his new life as the Avatar. There's also Sozin fighting to stay Roku’s friend, his past fighting to stay in the present, and Gyatso being as lovable as he is, the future slowly becoming the present and pushing the past farther back. I foresee some jealousy on Sozin’s side mayhaps, and maybe some frustration on Gyatso’s side because “Why is this Fire Prince being so MEAN TO ME I’m LITERALLY the AVATAR’S BFF!!” I can't get my thoughts in order rn because I have been doing Work and my brain is Dead but I understand and share in your excitement 100% :)

but the idea of jelly Sozin was actually was so juicy that I wrote a lil thing about it I hope you don't mind :)

“And here is your room,” Sozin said with a smile, pushing open the door and revealing the inside with a grand sweep of his arm. “I made sure nobody came in and moved around all of your stuff; the dust on the floor is 100% natural!”

“Wow, thanks,” Roku scoffed, unable to keep a smile off of his own face. “I’m so glad. Thank you, Sozin, I do appreciate the gesture.”

“Right…” Sozin’s smile softened and he peered up at Roku through his eyelashes, his cheeks darkening. He’s always been the shorter one, and he seemed even shorter now that Roku had hit yet another growth spurt. “You know, I really missed you. I’m glad you’re home,” he said quietly, as if he was afraid that someone would overhear.

Roku bowed his head so he could look down at his best friend, a similarly soft smile on his lips. “I missed you too,” he whispered back. “It’s weird not seeing your dumb face every day.”

Sozin turned away, worrying his lower lip between his teeth, his grip tightening on Roku’s door. “Roku, I-”

“Wow, this place is awesome!” Gyatso crowed, narrowly missing bowling Roku over as he basically crashed into his back. “Hey, do I get a room too? Is it near Roku’s? Oooh can it be near that little pond I saw earlier? It’s got these turtle-ducks and-”

Sozin’s eyebrow ticked and he shot Gyatso a look that Roku had dubbed the ‘annoying teacher’ look when they were younger, reserved for prissy professors obsessed with dates. “Yes, I will see to it that you are given appropriate housing,” he forced through gritted teeth, removing his hand from Roku’s door and holding it behind his back. Roku tilted his head minutely, surprised—what had caused his mood to change so drastically?

“Cool!” Gyatso stopped using Roku as a wall and poked his head inside of his room, his eyes wide. “Woah, is this your room, Roku? It’s so fancy!”

Roku sighed, bringing a hand up to rub at his temples. Great Agni, Gyatso, calm down for once in your life. “I’m sorry, Gyatso can be very energetic. You come to love it, though. Now, what were you going to say?” He prompted, returning a smile to his face.

Sozin’s face froze and his shoulders tightened. “I… nevermind. It was stupid. I’m glad you’re back, Roku, and I’ll see you later,” he replied curtly. Then he turned around and walked off, one of his hands curled into a tight fist behind his back as the other gripped his wrist.

[thenugking]

✨🌊🌸🌿

✨Which is your favourite platonic BG3 dynamic and why?

Hmm. Based on purely in-game stuff, it’s got to be Wyll and Karlach. Enemies to BFFs in like three days. Out of game, I love my Durge Lee with Astarion (they are like when you have two pets or perhaps siblings who sometimes just slap the shit out of each other for no reason before going back to chilling together) and my first Tav, Val, with Shadowheart (bitchy goths who don’t care about people except actually they care So Much). Would love to get around to writing them someday.

Also the dynamic I’m writing between Orin and Ketheric in No Highly Esteemed Deed. This is Ketheric’s emotional support surrogate daughter figure with zero red flags!

For my favourite dynamic not in the game or made up by me… we’ll get to that in question four!

🌊What moment in the game had the strongest emotional impact on you? 

Karlach’s breakdown after killing Gortash gets me every time. And I was sobbing in my Shadowheart Origin playthrough when I saved her parents. That storyline is so comforting to me, especially when, if you’re not playing as her, it’s Arnell who goes, “Ohh you don’t want to go by your old name anymore, of course we’ll love you for whoever you are now.”

🌸Rec one of your fics and tell us what you like about it!

My series No Highly Esteemed Deed Is Commemorated Here is my baby at the moment. So I’m actually reccing two fics but look I spend half my time thinking about this series and I want some validation. But, uh, warning for incest and every relationship here being at least toxic, if not downright abusive. If you like your doves dead, come and give me some validation, if you’re not into that shit, understandable, have a nice day.

What Is Here Was Dangerous And Repulsive To Us: Gortash and Durge take a nice romantic carriage ride to Moonrise Towers except that lol no they don’t, Orin Is Also Here, and gortash isn’t positive she wants to fuck her sibling but The Vibes Are Fucking Rancid.

Super proud of the slowly building Well This Is Fucking Uncomfortable in this one! And that multiple people have told me “damn how did you make me feel for Gortash here?” He’s still very much a bastard and I loved writing him hating the whole world, but he’s fucking Going Through it.

One of my favourite reviews: EXCUSE ME ORIN> MA’AM. THIS IS A WENDYS

This Place Is Not A Place Of Honour: The multichapter sequel that I’m currently working on! The events between the gang arriving at Moonrise and Orin stabbing my Durge in the brain (and the aftermath of that, if I ever get there). They’re all doing their evil plotting in the background, but it’s mostly focused on the relationships between Durge, Orin, Gortash and Ketheric, and the various ways in which these characters are deeply fucked up.

Like I mentioned, I’m really enjoying writing Orin and Ketheric’s weird fucked up friendship. Ketheric imprints on Orin as his New Daughter Figure after Isobel runs away from him (just because he told her that her wife who he is currently torturing was dead so Isobel should get over her) and that’s going about as well as you’d expect. Ketheric is trying to fix Orin while ignoring most of her underlying issues, Orin’s worrying that she’s going to lose Durge to the Gortash and the Absolute plot, Gortash is determined to Win his relationship with Durge despite the constant red flags, Durge is causing problems on purpose.

Another of my favourite reviews: i went into that scene like "hehe the horrors" and i went out like "OH DEAR GOD THE HORRORS"

🌿Rec someone else’s BG3 fic and tell us what you like about it!

here there be dragons by shadowfell

13 year old Orin ends up the ward of the BG1/2 protagonist and under a geas stopping her from murdering people, and becomes friends with 14 year old Wyll. Two Weird Theatre Kids with no other friends hanging out while Orin puts a lot of effort into drawing Wyll’s thematically appropriate gruesome death. They work so well together and their dynamic fucking delights me. And I love getting to see my two blorbos who fandom often doesn't give the love they deserve fucking shine.

There’s also a multi-chapter sequel of the two of them as adults going through the game plot. It’s still early on, but chapter four got posted last night and that’s my read for this evening, once I’m done killing Orin in my current BG3 game and need to go and read a kinder AU for her.

[guessimate]

Hello, welcome to round 5, Bruni family part 1 (I think I'll be splitting posts about this family, as there are so many of them and they have 2 households).

Winter ('ice age') has come to my neighbourhood. I'm thinking of having it last this whole generation, and then moving on to the 'ancient' times. I am going to give each family a cave (for free), a couple more Sun&Moon mods (the giving tree/functional fire, and ice fishing). I believe most of the cave items are from the mining set (on top of the cave I just have a tiled roof with deco stones on it). For Sun&Moon mods head here.

At first it was not cold or snowy at all, so I ended up just setting all seasons to winter. I think to make it fair for the other families, I should start the all-year-round winter on the 3rd day of the season, as that's when it started snowing (and they couldn't fish the maxis way anymore). The Orange family is also a bit ahead in time, because I played them a bit longer the last rotation, so that's what I'll try to do.

~*~

The firstborn daughter, Baset, aged up into an adult this round, and the youngest child of the Brunis became a kid. The middle daughter, Satet, will be becoming a teen next round, so I'll focus on her more then (this round she was just happily fishing anyway).

The toddler, Gautseshen, started this round in aspiration failure, despite having learnt all the toddler skills (besides the Nursery Rhyme). What hit her aspiration bar so hard was the death in the family.

Even though Baset must be terrified by her younger sister's fate, she might have to start thinking of marrying someone, or her parents will choose a mate for her. They would like to have more grandchildren, and see a relative get married.

Baset wanted to bond with her youngest sister, Gautseshen. And after they had become BFF-s, they both wanted to go hiking. I imagine they went hunting together (I will use the hunting spears mod too). I'm really not surprised they are besties, since they have almost the same personalities (they both have high points in nearly everything, but they're 0 shy; members of this family are overall very similar to each other).

Not that it matters, but Baset rolled the want to get a job in Law Enforcement career, which is quite rare for Romance sims, I think. She will not be getting the job, but maybe it's a sign she'd like to fight burglars.

~*~

Nothing much happened but the heir with his wife paid his parents a visit. I will play them right after this household.

Yes, I know I should give my sims more appropriate clothes, and I will after they have been hunting enough. I'm planning on giving them all some leather castaway outfits.

[clunelover]

I was going to do this as a reply but it was getting too long, so @alfa-lima-limon and anyone else who is interested - how we got the idea to check out OT is actually along the lines of what you just said - he would have big meltdowns over seemingly small things (or sometimes just nothing, as far as I could see). If I go through my MyChart messages between me and his pediatrician, I think as far back as 2 years old I was asking her about what I considered unusually explosive tantrums…but we were told “well it’s age appropriate still, just keep an eye on it” and then “everyone is stressed due to the pandemic and it’s especially hard on some kids” etc etc until he for sure became too old to be tantrumming like this. e

I really didn’t know what to make of it, I thought he was just “difficult” (I know not a good label but I didn’t think he fit the profile of any specific condition) but my best mom friend has a kid who’s a year or so older and autistic, and she was the one who first said “it sounds like sensory issues actually” and then I asked social worker BFF and she said she agreed - it’s still sort of amazing to me, I could not put these pieces together on my own, but now I can see he had:

- extreme meltdowns especially at times of transition, like trying to leave in the morning, which is often a hard time for these kids

- when in the midst of a meltdown about leaving in the morning, he would try to strip off all his clothes. If he was prevented from doing it he would at the very least take his shoes and socks off in the car. At the time I thought this was him “being obstinate” and just seizing at any possible thing to delay, but now I know he was overwhelmed and seeking a particular sensation to make him feel better (air on skin, or escaping clothes that feel confining or scratchy and thus upsetting). He still doesn’t like to have shoes and socks on.

- really rigid about getting his way or having people play exactly how he wants. Again, another thing I thought was him just being…kind of a jerk (🫣) but is more to do with changes feeling upsetting, so anything he can do to control what is happening will make him feel better. It doesn’t mean that’s okay for him to do of course but now we know that if he’s not overloaded with sensory stimuli he’s more likely to be able to go with the flow, and sometimes he just needs a little extra time to calm down and accept what is happening.

So, I was kind of skeptical (and still in dark moments sometimes think “isn’t all this just CODDLING him?”) but we got him evaluated by a local place that does OT among other therapies and services (like speech, psychology, etc) and they said he did seem like a good candidate for OT.

As part of the occupational therapist’s initial assessment, she checked for “retained primitive reflexes” …like, the Moro reflex is the only one I’d ever heard of prior to all this, but there are others! And you’re supposed to not have them by a certain age but if they don’t go away, it can lead to issues with integrating sensory information. C has retained a couple (I forget which) that, when retained, can cause issues with tracking movement with your eyes (which then leads to getting overstimulated easier than people who don’t have it). Isn’t that CRAZY?! This is something that is still a little in the “sounds fake but okay” realm for me, but at the same time does make sense to me. It’s weird.

So a lot of our OT activities involve things where you need hand eye coordination and balance.

This whole thing about “being afraid to fail” is something he’s only recently started bringing up, but the occupational therapist told me he probably did already have that fear, but he’s only now become able to express it. And it goes right back to wanting things to be a certain way, unexpected outcomes feeling bad, etc.

So yeah, it’s been a journey for sure! A lot of the work is of course us learning how best to react and help him get what he needs.

He had the recent evaluation for autism and didn’t meet criteria for a diagnosis, but has symptoms for sure. Jeremy has bonded with his mom over this, because according to her this is exactly what he was like as a kid (eventually diagnosed with ADHD as a teen). So we just kind of keep an eye on it and get him evaluated again if his symptoms get markedly more severe.

Okay that was a large dump of info, but anyway, happy to answer any questions about it any time!

[hullosweetpea]

hello friend!!! for your plot bunnies list, 1 and/or 22 please!!! 💛

how about both!

1.) baby stobin series ❤️

baby stobin, my beloved 🥺. this is just a series of one-shots based on my stobin month prompt “birthday” wherein stobin meet at age six and become the cutest bffs. in a perfect world, i work on this whenever and just surprise drop stobin moments. i just have a lot of emotions of stobin going through the growing pains of childhood 🥹I’ve being going back and forth on if i would write the series to overlap with the show or stop where s1 starts. The current one i’m working on is middle school stobin, so here’s a snippy snippy:

Steve watches Robin ride up the sidewalk of Hawkins Middle School. “Robbie, over here!”

She coasts to the bike rack —barely stops her bike in a slot— and tackles Steve in a hug. “I missed you, Stevie!” 

“I wanted to call, but my Mom wouldn’t let me.” Steve pushes Robin off of him and stands. He holds a hand out to her. “Come on, I want to show you all the cool stuff.” He pushes through the front doors and the student body is a mass of limbs. A large banner that reads “Welcome Back!” hangs above the hallway. Steve shoulders his way through the crowd and stops at a wall of lockers. “This one is mine.” He spins the lock and opens the door. “Look, I’ve already put our pictures up.” He points to a row of photo booth film. “Your locker’s going to be in the sixth grade hallway.” 

“Slow down! I’ve barely got in a word and I haven’t seen you since the end of July.” Robin places her hands on Steve’s shoulders. She frowns and tilts her head from side-to-side. “Still, tragically, 30% hair and 70% dingus.” 

Steve laughs and bumps his shoulder against hers. “So are you.” 

Robin blinks and squishes Steve’s face between her hands. “When did you get braces?” 

Steve feels his face flush. “Around the middle of August. I can’t eat gummy worms now.” He pouts. 

“No! Who’s going to eat my green gummy worms now?” Robin shuts Steve’s locker and pulls a folded paper square from her pocket. “Can you help me find Mr. Clarke’s room? He’s my home room.” 

22.) TikTok Stobin

So this is v much just an idea that was written down, but this one is based on a TikTok that was shared in the server a hot minute ago and I would have to track it down. It shows a woman knitting and she talks about how she can hear her apartment neighbor through their shared walls and he tells all his dates the same really cute story about himself and his grandma. and then it cuts to like a year later, and the woman is knitting something else and she tells the story about how she left her window open that looks out into the complex’s hallway and she totally flashes her neighbor and his date and she’s just like “what’s the appropriate apology for that” and the whole thing is v stobin coded.

send me a number between 2-40 and i’ll tell you about a stranger things prompt

[bentleysnbookshops]

Head Cannons of how I think Crowley would take care of a depressed partner GN (may be a series):

1. Crowley becomes a master at reading his partner's mood, offering support without overwhelming them. He picks up on the subtleties of your tone, body language, sighs, habits and actions that indicate a low.

2. He develops a list of comfort foods that he knows will make you feel comforted if not happy and secretly collaborates with Aziraphale, his resident foodie BFF, to create a stash of heavenly treats around his apartment.

3. Crowley encourages open communication, making it clear that his partner can share their feelings without judgment. He has no problem listening to you talk on and on about your feelings if that’s what you need, sometimes his hyperactive ness kicks in and he wanders while listening but he always listens. He will, when appropriate, share his thoughts. Additionally, he subtly incorporates positive affirmations into conversations, in an attempt of boosting his partner's self-esteem. He tries not to commiserate unless he is also in a mood.

4.He organizes movie nights filled with lighthearted comedies or nostalgic favorites to lift their spirits. He loves to lay on the couch with you wrapped up in some blankets. Often times he’s watching you watch the movie, he loves seeing your reactions.

5. Crowley creates a playlist of music that you like that’s up beat, knowing your tendency to feed your low demeanor with sad music. He tries to keep the music on his playlist for you with an uplifting vibe, including some of his favorites. When he plays it for you he tries to get you moving a bit with the music. He never stops you from listening to whatever you want, but if he has the control, he tries to keep it peppy and something he knows you like.

6. He offers gentle physical affection, like comforting hugs or holding hands, providing reassurance without words. When you sleep, he always goes to bed with you so you’re not lonely, even if he doesn’t need sleep. He always keeps you in his arms while you sleep. Sometimes if he’s feeling silly and wants to see you smile he will go to little snake from and do silly things or wrap around your wrist or neck to snuggle.

7. Crowley discreetly arranges surprise visits from your friends or family to offer additional support and connection if you have some that are good for you during these times. Aziraphale is often one of them, coming over to see Crowley and you and make sure you’re both alright.

8. He plans small, manageable activities to break up your routine. Encourages your hobbies or takes you to feed peas to ducks.

9. He makes sure your appointments either doctors and therapists are booked and don’t go forgotten. To that end, your prescriptions are always full, and sorted into boxes and he ensures that a dose never is skipped. The best part is your insurance miraculously become really good and everything you need and more is suddenly covered.

[nono-bunny]

I can't believe they combined the Canada and memory loss arc, that's fucking brutal!!! Ya'll I've been crying for an hour straight why would they do that to me 😭

No but. Actually I very much like Umi being the one to lure Tsukushi out to the blizzard rather than Yuriko, she feels much more like the type to say something like that out of habitual lying and spite without even realizing, and I buy her apology over it a lot more since like. Yuriko&co are kinda just dumb, but they also,,, continue to pull shit like that, because they're dumb and entitled and jealous. This definitely seems to be a first for Umi, and like, especially with how the jdrama didn't mention her being a habitual boyfriend stealer... I think this legit just might have been the first time she really messed up with her lies like that- a lot of her breakdown was exaggerated and it started to become a big cry-fes when she sensed she had an audience, but like. Before that I think it really was a genuine private moment of reality hitting her in the face... Which Rui really made sink in for her

LOVED the change of not having Tsukushi just. Forgive and forget and say "we'll be friends someday!" after what she pulled, like. That amicable farewell and genuine show of good faith from Umi definitely feels much more deserved and appropriate. Tsukushi is still too forgiving, but like. This time Umi DID actually try, like, she pretty much had nothing to gain there but her forgiveness- she made amends the best way she could without making excuses or seemingly empty promises or demanding too much of Tsukushi, she just. Helped when help was needed and I think that's a much better send off for a girl whose whole personality revolved around presenting herself as a kind person in order to get attention. Like. Her ACTUALLY doing something for once? It wasn't much, it absolutely wasn't! Not when compared to all the shit she pulled, but. It was a start for her, and I really liked seeing it. THIS is an Umi I can believe might actually go on to change, and one who might someday end up actually becoming friends with Tsukushi.

Fr they did a great job by combining like. The most frustrating manga arc with probably the sweetest one that was missing because Kazuya isn't there, and they truly brought out the best of them both! Very strong ending! Also made me kinda physically cringe, because public proposals make me intensely uncomfortable and I could see it coming from a mile away (I mean, COME ON, FUCKING BUDOKAN) but I'm happy that it worked for the two of them lmao.

Personal favorite moment would have to be the debut of the teasing Sakurako we've been missing out on, and it being the first time she and Shigeru were in the same place so like. It 100% was the beginning of what I can only imagine is going to be a beautiful friendship! They didn't interact once I don't think but!!! Trust me on this!!! They're girlboss bffs after this, Yoko Kamio said so herself!!! Source; the manga!!!!

Gonna have to take a break because I am. Emotionally drained for the day but if these two don't interact in the movie imma riot 🙃 (or maybe just like. Look for some fanfics because I have not finished the manga but these two gave off a VERY strong "we both got dumped by the same guy, maybe we should just go out together! haha just kidding... unless?" vibe)

Ah fuck I meant for this to be like. A one paragraph add on,,,, self control? Restraint? Compact writing? I don't know her

I can't believe the Jdrama of Hana Yori Dango did my girl Shigeru so dirty like bro wtf

So this is? Technically the second HYD post I'm writing here, and my first one still exists in draft form, it's just. A true mess, written before I finished either the manga or the jdrama which I've sorta been going through at the same time- I started with the jdrama, fell in love with the story, paused to go read the manga until the SECOND Yuki and Sojiro intermission during which I got frustrated* and decided to pause and go back to the jdrama and start it from the beginning and anyway----

I ADORE manga Shigure, like. I think it's impossible not to love her, and she was definitely one of the real shining stars of the story in the later parts. I love how her and Tsukushi end up mirroring Tsukasa and Rui (WHICH THE JDRAMA PLAYED UP BY DOING A PARALLEL SCENE OF RUI AND SHIGERU AND IT WAS GLORIOUS). I love how ultimately, she's sad and heartbroken about how things turned out with Tsukasa, and how she chooses to continuously try and learn how to put those intense feelings aside not only for herself, or Tsukasa, or even Tsukushi, which she very dearly loves, but for all of them and because it was ultimately the right thing to do by ALL of them. I love how easily I believed her when she says SHE'S Tsukushi's best friend, because, really, she was!** I LOVE her strange, amazing friendship with Sakurako, like, they're such an unlikely pair, and they worked SO well together in a way I never would have expected them to. Mostly thought I just. I loved her existence as a character in the story, she was such an excellent mirror to both Sakurako and Rui, who are the only real "rivals" Tsukushi and Tsukasa ever have in the manga (Fs in the chat for Kazuya, the poor guy never stood a chance I am ignoring Umi she is a bitch and I hate her she got off WAY too easy for the actual malevolent shit she pulled)

....And also being part of my beloved love-rivals to best friends trope, I love that shit so much!! If Tsukasa and Rui can both love the same girl and remain friends, Shigeru and Tsukushi should too, and they do!!!! Except that, of course, they don't really in the jdrama, because they were never actually friends there and unfortunately Shigeru is presented as like. Weirdly way more observant, calculating, and even cruel than how in the manga she was mostly just. Taking Tsukushi and Tsukasa's words at face value and doing her best to make both relationships work at the same time. Like she had her bitch moment in both versions but in the manga in was much more of a "I'm extremely emotional and lashing out as a result" than how she just,,,, continously emotionally tortures Tsukushi and Tsukasa, and straight up ignores them when they talk to her about the situation, like BRO I WAS NOT A FAN OF HER IN THE MERGER EPISODE, WTF!! Also then she just,,,, fucks off to NY, and personally I am more heartbroken by THAT than by Kazuya and Kinsan just NOT EXISTING IN THE JDRAMA (which, just to be clear.... I AM DEVASTATED BY, THEY'RE BOTH SO MUCH FUN!!!), like. I guess we just never get to see the Sakurako and Shigeru friendship, or Shigeru being just. The best in every subsequent appearance 😢

Anyway she's been gone for five seconds and I miss her already, BRING ME BACK MY GIRL AND ALSO LET TSUKUSHI ACTUALLY CONSIDER HER A FRIEND THIS TIME TOO!!!! AND SAKURAKO AND SHIGERU SPIN OFF WHEN?????

*So tbh the reason my first post is such a mess is mostly me writing it immediately at this point, when I was very frustrated and I had a toigh time being coherent- long story short (might still edit and release that post someday though), Iprobably only had an issue with it because the jdrama did that part MUCH better by making it actually like. Connect with the rest of the story rather than essentially just be one LONG oneshot that completely disrupted the flow of the story, I don't think I'd have hated it as much if I read it first tbh- it's also like, the only case of me strongly feeling that one version was clearly superior over the other, because despite the differences and the relatively weird exclusive plot points each version has, I somehow like both version just as much. The Shigeru case definitively comes close though lmao

**Fr though adding Okami-san in the jdrama definitely helped solidify Tsukushi and Yuki's friendship, and also give Yuki a more satisfying role in the story other than "Tsukushi's longtime best friend who is mostly irrelevant aside from her and Sojiro's weird one shots", like. She was constantly present and her transformation from a weak naive girl to someone strong who can protect herself and help others was much more satisfying

[shakethatsassyass]

hi!! are u still active? i see the askbox is opeen sooo.

could i request some relationship of older!GOM like who's the marrying type, what do they like, who sleeps around most, who finds dating bother some etc etc!!! Maybe their ideal types in a s/o as well??? Thank u so muuuuch im so excited if everaaa

Hi! This request is really interesting and here are my dating headcanons for the GOM. You can request another one for their ideal types if you’d like since this ended up quite long 😅

GOM Dating/Marriage Headcanons

a/n: unedited

KUROKO

Come on, obviously this guy is the most emotionally intelligent out of all of them. 

But does he approach the people he likes? No 

But it’s painfully obvious when he does fancy someone

His ears become red. Warning: fair chance of passing out

He does his best to be more assertive though, meticulously planning how to approach his crush

Very very thoughtful, remembers what you told him 128 days, 13 hours, 6 minutes ago about that video you were showing him

When he’s with someone, you better bet the relationship will last for years

Not that he’s boring like that or anything but Kuroko hates the mind games that come with modern dating

But Kuroko’s immensely loyal to some may argue, a fault, I think

Like s/o wants to swerve careers? Kuroko supports

Wants to start a small business? He’s supportive 

Needs to rob a bank/hide a body? He has all the tools already......

I just imagine domestic fluff kuroko being the troll that he is. he purposefully hides in the corner to surprise you with a heart attack when you come back home 

KISE

Kise has quite a fanbase, as we all know

Headcanoning is that a word that Kise gets scouted by a Japanese company and becomes an idol for a short while

Kise’s a jack-of-all-trades so I can definitely see him working in different fields and having multiple sources of income

Which means he’s probably met a lot of people along the way

So yes this boy dates casually a lot, mostly just for publicity, and the other party knows it usually. People just come up to him and ask him out.

He has to have MAD respect for the person to even consider seriously or sometimes casually dating them or making the first move, though. Like the person of his interest has to be VERY good at what they do and have banger character

Kise is, contrary to popular opinion, not shallow at all. Personality and a person’s passion/morals comes first. He knows the feeling of being ogled for your looks and how those feelings of infatuation are fleeting

BUT I’D BE LYING IF I DONT SAY THAT KISE 100% LOVES THE CHASE. He’s a fast learner so I bet he also gets bored pretty quickly

If you wanna date Kise, you better not be the jealous type and not be controlling. Someone who can keep him on his toes. 

Fun, goofy, sometimes intimidating lover

AOMINE

Somehow I see him settling down earlier than the others. 

But before that he sleeps around a lot. 

He likes hot women, that’s canon, but like he doesn’t date seriously during his early 20s, just casually. 

Many fics present Aomine as this suave guy who can pick up any person he likes but I honestly doubt that’s the case 

Definitely gets with Momoi at least once, whether they cross the line between bffs and lovers officially is up to Aomine sadly (see Replace novel)

Thankfully, he’s as graceful on the court as he’s not on the dating scene 

So many people approach him on their own, often as fans who, if they ask appropriately enough, gets to go home with him

Boy just wants to have fun

But he never love bombs, and is in no way a manipulative lover

Respects your boundaries and asks for consent 1000%

When he falls in love tho, he falls hard

He might start off with seemingly cold feet and is indifferent but that’s just him actually thinking how to properly take the relationship to the next level considering all his hang-ups

Aomine’s insanely loyal and a committed relationship with him is something that even becomes sweeter over time. 

Once he’s committed, he’s all in: he thinks of marriage, kids, the works

Aomine may look tough but he’s all soft for his s/o

MIDORIMA

He’s a late bloomer in the dating department

Midorima just thinks it’s bothersome. He’s busy with basketball and medical school already. He just doesn’t see what the fuss is about 

But can you imagine if he just falls in love with an incompatible sun sign???

Like an Aquarius or a Libra (Murasakibara’s one)… or god forbid an Aries!!

And he just freaks out and questions his beliefs and does research on the rest of his/their birth chart. Lmao

Takao secretly made Midorima a dating app account and his profile gets plenty of traffic

Midorima knows nothing about this and refuses downright every time Takao tries to set him up with someone

Doesn’t do casual. Period.

You have to be very patient with him he’s the densest out of all of them you might as well just spell it out for him for Midorima to get the hint that you’re flirting

Midorima’s romantic relationships can only ever happen organically so you can’t 1. Force it. 2. Expect him to seek out relations for its own sake

Will either have to be set up by a friend on a date OR

Have some Kdrama destiny shit to occur for romance to get through his head (Doctor Midorima with patient reader AU???

Needless to say Midorima’s a faithful partner in all senses of the word. He’s consistent, hard-working, and responsible. He’s the kind of person who’d literally grow old with his lover and wake up next to them each morning. 

MURASAKIBARA

Another one who doesn’t like initiate dates

No formal conversations of labels or anything like that

He may be a man child at times but no one is more loyal than this giant

You wanna date him? You better know how to cook. Or at the very least love food

He will not ask you out, well not directly anyway

Doesn’t take breakups well

He will sulk for days, someone from the GOM or Himuro or his siblings has to drag him out of the room so he could take a shower

One day you’ll just notice him hanging out with you

Anyway I hc that he gets the most jealous out of everyone in GOM. Like he gets too little attention and you’ll find him pouting like a kid

Mura also really easily distracted, and might even come across quite cold

It’s only because he rarely sweats the small stuff

So sometimes you’d be upset and he wouldn’t notice

WARNING: this could go on for days so unless you tell it to him straight up he won’t know you’re even upset

Buuuuut gets the hang of it after several months

He’s attentive when he needs to be, especially when it comes to his partner’s needs

So fights would rarely occur, unless it’s about his habits

His ideal s/o is a mom. Sorta

There I said it

TL;DR Murasakibara baby in the streets daddy in the sheets

But tbh any established relationship with him would be quite stable, his life would simply revolve around his s/o, food, and basketball

AKASHI

Akashi’s future is all planned out.

Being the only child in his political and influential family, marriage and family’s simply part of his duty. I read somewhere that his parents were most likely in an arranged marriage and that it’s not far off that he would be too, as Masaomi expects, when the time comes.

He sees the appeal in dating around but eventually decides against it because it’s seen as taboo (his family seems to be traditional), though he thinks about it from time to time when he feels lonely :-(

Lots of women (and men) fawn themselves over Akashi, he’s used to it, while he appreciates the support, emotional connection and bond is an important factor for the redhair

So he’s either seeing someone properly or not talking to anybody at all. Akashi’s forward like that.

He’s very discreet about his dating life. Like one day he just announces to the Miracles that he’s engaged to the love of his life and like??? No one knows he was even seeing someone?? Maybe just midorima and kuroko. Maybe Momoi (and by association Aomine)

Akashi haaaas relationships… they’re just very selective and won’t last long if he can’t see marrying them

Eventually marries for love. I just can’t see him tagging along an arranged marriage (like his father expects) with someone if he doesn’t like them

Yes boy do clear that karmic ancestral baggage

If you want to date Akashi, you should probably not be afraid to take the lead too sometimes. He already juggles plenty of responsibilities outside the home, he appreciates if he can just let go of the reins when he’s with his s/o

Bonus bonus if you can hold an intellectual conversation with him. He also takes a keen interest in your hobbies

Akashi’s a generous, kind, faithful, and attentive lover. You’re provided for for life.

[hologramcowboy]

https://twitter.com/raths_kitten/status/1604578613042548736

Jensen also improvised as Soldier Boy and Beau Arlen. He’s going to become the actor you can never fully write for but may get great stuff out of. #SPNNash

https://twitter.com/inpainla67/status/1604578624790843396

jensen: i get texts from the show runner in the editing bay like ‘did you mean to do this?’ and i’m like ‘i dunno!’

Do you think this kind of lackadaisical attitude about the script actually helps Jensen, or hurts him? I would think that it hurts him because I've heard there are shows where improvisation is highly discouraged. It almost makes it sound like Jensen never really memorizes all his lines, he just gets an idea of the scene and uses his own words. To be honest, it sounds kind of lazy, but I was curious about your opinion.

I won't just give you my opinion but that of CDs, producers, writers, acting coaches, etc. An actor who doesn't memorize his lines disrespects the writing and the whole cast and crew. It's a huge no no. It's a very easy way to get blacklisted from auditions or even fired from set.

It sounds like Jensen has the entitlement of an A lister or a guy directing and producing his own movies and he takes liberties that surely offend the professionals involved as he is overstepping boundaries. If his relationship with the people on a particular set is like let's say director is his bff so let's him do whatever, fine but still needs to due inner prep work and proper script analysis.

If he's making calls on scenes without getting feedback from the appropriate people then his career is going to be very short and I am calling it now. Because that denotes a sense of immense entitlement and a lack of care towards others as well as especially towards the storytelling itself. Something a professional actor would never put at risk.

"an actor you can never fully write" is an actor who is incapable of embodying the character and rather creates a caricature of it...Jensen won't work on any A list projects because real actors don't work like that, ever. It's one thing to improvise a line based on your script analysis and inner work and another entirely to wing an entire performance with no through line and with the entitlement that you just work because you're Jensen Ackles. If that's the way Jensen approaches his scenes then he is no Actor, sadly, and he will never be an A lister, unless someone writes a hugely entitled character and then he can just play himself and "improvise" as far as it will take him and it won't take him very far. The industry is looking for actors who truly live their roles and to do that you must understand and embody the character. Jensen is all over the place and doesn't know his characters, he diluted SB and failed to bank on the role and as for Beau, he keeps shifting week to week so who even is he as a character? Because Jensen even changes his vocal register, mannerisms and makes misaligned choices compared to his previous work on the show.

Also, there's no such thing as "improvising" because when you are truly connected to a character you can follow his/her organic impulses and amazing things can happen and so I think this is the angle Jensen is trying to play, trying to come off like some very rare A listers like Meryl Streep who is indeed capable of organically following those impulses and giving you a lot to work with but I guarantee you that even Meryl learns her lines to perfection.

I'm really dissapointed, Jensen sounds like an extremely lazy, self involved actor when an actor should be about allowing others to experience catharsis by giving life to certain truths others can recognize themselves in. Sounds like Jensen goes on set to play different variations of himself and doesn't care about serving the story, the character and most of all the public. Hope I'm wrong but it all sounds pretty bad.

Thank you for the beautiful ask! ♥️

[thevirgodoll]

Me and my bff have noticed that the third girl that we incorperated into our friend group acts out when she’s drunk. She doesnt know when to stop and its become a problem. She always gets too fucked up, she tries to flirt or fight with me and my bffs boyfriends and talks about really graphic sexual stuff in front of them. How should we go about handling this? She doesnt understand us when we explain that she needs to work on herself. We really love her and we do alot for her (we always pay for her whenever we go out etc)

Hey angel,

It sounds like your friend is having a lot of her own internal problems that manifest as alarming behavior. This is definitely a symptom of a bigger issue. Dealing with it from a rational perspective while she is drunk won't help you, because she is not sober.

Who is the closest to her? Maybe you should have that friend speak to her individually. A group intervention will only overwhelm her and make her feel like garbage.

I would avoid framing this as "stop drinking now"/"you act a fool and embarrass us when you drink/etc. because it lacks empathy and perspective. In my experience, I avoid the word "problem" as well.

Try "Hey girl, I really care about you and I get really concerned when we are out. I have a lot of fun with you, but sometimes you get a little too drunk and act differently" or "Are you worried about your drinking? Do you think you sometimes drink more than planned?"

This conversation should happen in a neutral zone...away from people...at an appropriate time when she is sober and not hungover. If she doesn't respond well, just say "Okay. I hope you will think about it."

Try also hanging out with her in situations that don't involve going out or drinking. This will make it easier to just be there for her, without having to overextend yourself. If you are trying to counteract the behavior, your friend group might have to make a pact to stop drinking so much around her.

I won't say that she isn't aware of her drinking being a problem. I won't say that she is aware. The worst thing y'all can do is shame her and be too emotional. I know she is out of pocket, but chances are if you rail on her about the things she has done to y'all, it will only make her defensive and shut down. A lot of people who drink too much already feel enough self loathing when they don't remember what they have done or said.

Know this: you can't make someone work on themselves or see how they look from your point of view. You can only meet them where they are.

Give her grace. It sounds like she's fairly new to the group and you all don't know her well. The things she is doing has no excuse or rhyme or reason, but it's not a personal thing. It's a manifestation of poor self management and a coping mechanism. For whatever reason that may be.

The most you can do is say your rules on drinking before you all go out and try to cut her off. When y'all are out, just prioritize water and distracting her from getting too turnt up with random conversations or dancing. But don't police a grown woman!

Above all, set boundaries and be clear without a judgmental tone of voice. This should not block all of you from having fun. Be prepared for pushback, be prepared to distance yourself, and be prepared to sometimes go out without her. Give me an update and let me know how it goes.

[carewyncromwell]

Bill would be the one friend tasked with ALL the difficult “teenager” conversations. Going on your first date? Becoming sexually active? Worried you might be pregnant? Thinking you might not be straight or cis? Doesn’t matter whether Bill’s experienced those things or not himself, he’d STILL be the designated “parent” in this situation and he’d fall back on his mother Molly’s habits and talk you through it and reassure the hell out of you until you felt better. 🥰

Mum Bill is all I can think about, and I'm gonna make it everybody's problem.

Can you imagine Bill giving the gang THE TALK?

[antifainternational]

Whenever I get invited to a "leftist" space I'm almost immediately kicked out for advocating violence against nazis. I've just become completely hopless as of late. I'm not sure anyone's gonna bother fighting back anymore and I have no idea what to do.

It looks like wherever you are, people are spelling “liberal” wrong, Anon. First, some memes to cheer you up:

Now, here are a couple of essays that underscore the huuuuge position of privilege it requires to be able to sip tea and politely debate the philosophical merits of stopping racists bent on genocide and murder: -”My ‘Nonviolent’ Stance Was Met With Heavily Armed Men” by Luke Rimmel -”Antifascist Practice and Impossible Non-Violence” by Natasha Lennard Not the essay-reading type?  Dr. Cornell West on his experience of nearly being lynched in Charlottesville in 2017 summarizes it succinctly:

Don’t feel like reading @ all?  Watch Philosophy Tube’s breakdown of “antifa + violence” (from the 20:47 mark of this video, but the entire video is faaaantastic!):

Three final thoughts for you, Anon: -Maybe the problem is how you’re phrasing things.  Antifa do not actually want violence and are not very keen to employ violence.  But we do believe that antifa reserve the right to defend their communities from fascists and because fascists are violent by definition, this can mean sometimes having to physically defend their communities.  “Community self-defense” = a far more accurate way to describe what antifascists do than “violence.” -If the liberals you’re running into know a better way of dealing with fascists, ask them what it is.  WE’D LOVE TO KNOW!!! Is it “we should win debates with fascists so everyone can see how bankrupt their ideology is?”  The historical record disproves this, as Holocaust survivor Frank Frison would tell you.  To quote Frank, “If fascism could be defeated in debate, I assure you that it would never have happened, neither in Germany, nor in Italy, nor anywhere else. Those who recognised its threat at the time and tried to stop it were, I assume, also called “a mob”. Regrettably too many “fair-minded” people didn’t either try, or want to stop it, and, as I witnessed myself during the war, accommodated themselves when it took over … People who witnessed fascism at its height are dying out, but the ideology is still here, and its apologists are working hard at a comeback. Past experience should teach us that fascism must be stopped before it takes hold again of too many minds, and becomes useful once again to some powerful interests.” Maybe liberals think we should just ignore the fascists and they’ll go away if we don’t give them the attention they’re seeking?  Again, the historical record shows that  an unopposed/”ignored” fascist force quickly moving on to pogroms and mass murder. The only thing that works to stop fascism is stopping them by any means necessary.  We don’t usually quote Adolf Hitler, but here’s what he said in 1933 about stopping the nazis: "Only one thing could have stopped our movement - if our adversaries had understood its principle and from the first day smashed with the utmost brutality the nucleus of our new movement." So really, if the liberals you’re running into don’t think it’s appropriate to physically defend their community from fascists, ask them what they think the correct approach is.  Should we hug it out with them, maybe?  Turn the other cheek and let them slaughter us?  Their responses will at least be entertainingly naïve.  Here’s a bingo card for you to use while you’re having those conversations:

-You should probably accept that some/most liberals are simply never going to accept that fascists can’t be debated away or ignored away or made your BFFs.  Fuck ‘em, then!  We know that fascists pose a very real threat to the lives of people they target for violence (a quick glance at our list of the 578 bigoted & fascist attacks on people so far this year - attacks which have killed 372 people and injured over 1100 others - attest to this fact) and must be stopped by any means necessary before they hurt people.  Move on and find some people that have a more realistic understanding of the threat posed by fascists and what is required to stop them. -Finally: antifascism isn’t all about violence.  In fact, it rarely is.  99% of anti-fascist activities don’t involve violence at all. Here’s our list of 30 antifa things you could probably do where you live that even liberals would approve of; here’s Pop Mob’s list of 40 street legal ways to fight fascists that again liberals are going to have a hard time arguing against.  Pick some stuff you think you can pull off, maybe grab a couple of friends, and do the things!  And let us know how it goes!

[a-libra-writes]

this might be far-fetched regarding stannis’s character, but i really like the idea of him pulling an all-nighter and being super groggy and exhausted the next morning, so he wakes up half-asleep, sees his childhood bff (who he’s crushing on) sitting in a leisure room reading or something, says good morning, and then pecks her on the cheek (or even the lips??), only to realize a good five seconds later what he’s just done. he becomes mortified and fully awake, and she’s never seen him so red 😅😅

awh no but i love this 😭😭 Esp if she was the one platonically kissing when they were younger, and ofc stopped when it wasn't appropriate. I like the idea of him kissing her on the forehead or cheek without thinking!!!!!!

he's mortified for days ... ..... doesnt want to look at her .... just hides in the library. what a doofus ... ....

[yakumtsaki]

Cyneswith rolls the want to dine out with her Methuselahian boy-toy and I’m hoping we can knock this love out during this date so we never have to see him again. Naturally the road to 20 simultaneous lovers is gonna have some duds, but did we really have to start with one?? Between Cyn’s gray hair turn on and Shajar’s fitness/fatness ones the chemistry mechanic is ruining my life this generation.

Yea that’s great, CADP, here’s an even more appropriate green face: 🤢🤢🤢

-I don’t get paid enough for this shit. 

Random Waiter sweetie, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry we’re romancing this old bitch in front of you, oh my god.

Mercifully CADP wastes no time falling in love with Cyneswith after this public woohoo witnessed by every townie within a 20 mile radius, and the date is a stunning success:

LMAO. Watch Cyneswith become a pillar of the community thanks to publicly banging the elderly, she truly can do no wrong. No wonder she’s the only child Jojo acknowledges. 

Beyond over for Don. 

Cyneswith returns home in the glowing triumph of her platinum plumbob. She literally hasn’t even made it to the front door yet-

-and CADP calls to ask her out again! Man, these drama professors are relentless, remember how half-alien prof stalked Gunther? Did this guy even go home or is he calling us right from the diner where we left him?? Whatever the case, hardest ‘Stay Here’ ever pressed, grandpa. 

-But I wanna go out with him again! 🌸

Yea well we don’t have time to be systematically dating these flops, Cyn, if you wanted in depth affairs you should have rolled a different LTW.

NICE. Another fine addition to our yard of wonders! We’re still not dating you, CADP, but when we’re throwing ragers on this thing, we’ll be thinking of you with some nostalgia and a lot of disgust. 

With Cyneswith platinum for the foreseeable future, I take a look at how everyone else is doing to ensure there aren’t any aspiration failures lurking. Ti-Ning and Frances are ultra-loved up and doing great-

-Angel rolls the want to get engaged to Wulf as well as the want TO INVITE OVER GUNTHER AKA HER TEENAGE FLING FROM 30 YEARS AGO, FFS ANGEL-

-and Don.. well he’s seen better days. The sad ‘go on a date’ want is killing me, I’ve considered it a given so far that he’s endgame for Cyn but they haven’t been interacting much lately, we’ll see how it goes, it might legit be over him.

The semester ends and with it Sophie’s insane 0 studying A+ streak, which is understandable since she literally almost died. Proud of Wulf and Don for bringing their grades up since they were both doing terribly, Don especially was flirting with academic probation last semester. I guess once your gf is no longer distracting you because she’s too busy cheating on you, you start hitting the books.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, it’s a new life.. and Sophie autonomously goes to gossip with Shajar!!! I was so shocked I unironically took a screenshot of the little action queue window, but whatever, it’s a big deal! 

-Hey Shajar, you know who’s an even bigger turbocuck than you?? Ti-Ning! God I can’t stand that loser. 

-Haha couldn’t agree more, Sophie! 🖤 Not like I’d agree with anything you say, I have my own personality and opinions and everything!! Why are we talking about him like he’s not right here? I’m not questioning you, just curious! 🖤

-It’s my new bullying tactic! 

-It’s great! 

-Congratulations on your ever-evolving bullying techniques, Sophie! 🖤

-Congratulations on idolizing me! Maybe you’re only a cuck and not a turbocuck after all.

AAAAAAA THEY’RE PLAYING RED HANDS OMG OMG IS THIS FINALLY GONNA HAPPEN????

-Haha great punch, Sophie! I actually felt the nerve damage as it happened!

-Thanks, ever since my post-workout coma I’m stronger than ever!

OMG THEY FINALLY BECAME FRIENDS. Bro I still cannot believe Cyneswith not only befriended Sophie first but is LITERALLY BFFS WITH HER. UN.REAL. ANYWAY there’s only so much blue balling I can take from these two, it’s time to find out if there’s something there once and for all. But first, we need a slight adjustment so let’s head to the nearest mirror..

-OH BROTHER.

In the name of love, Shaj, come on!

-So, Sophie.. As I’m sure you can see, I’m blonde now. And I had to sign a contract promising I won’t sue for how terrible it makes me look, so I’m legally blonde. Now that that’s out of the way..

-..it’s Ti-Ning trashing time!

GODDAMMIT SHAJAR NO. NO MORE TI-NING TRASHING, NO MORE USELESS PLATONIC INTERACTIONS, IT’S GO TIME. Check her out, and let the chips fall where they may!!!

F I N A L L Y I                 L N                L A                A L                N L                I Y L L A N I F

OK. SO NOW WE KNOW. What you do from now on is up to you, first and last time I’m intervening but these two were driving me insane.

-And so after careful consideration, it became clear that blonde is truly my color! 

-Are you sure, Shaj? Because when I saw you upstairs you were sobbing and doing vomiting motions in front of the mirror.

-Aw Angel, that’s not a very nice thing to say! Don’t worry sis, I love your new look! In fact, I’m so proud of the way you look I want you right there next to me when I meet potential lovers! 💗

NOW THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO SEE. I mean I wish I wasn’t seeing Shajar’s terrible blonde hair but Sophie’s blondeness turn on forced my hand. But the rest of this pic is what I like to see!

Despite recent developments, Sophie remains elusive af but I’m not butting in anymore, I’m returning to my go with the flow playstyle. So Sophie once again leaves us dick in hand and goes inside to.. you guessed it, socialize with Cyneswith. Shajar follows suit.. and..

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SHAJAR. YOU FINALLY STEPPED UP. I guess there’s only so much cucking from Cyneswith one person can take!!! If Sophie rejects this I’m literally gonna die-

-HELL YES OMG FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY 

CYNESWITH ARE YOU KIDDING ME. BRO. LITERALLY THE BIGGEST COCKBLOCK TO EVER LIVE

And Shajar is now in love with Sophie, whereas Sophie isn’t even best friends with her yet, oh Shaj.. Well whatever, you’ll get there (I hope). ACR gets right down to business, let’s ignore Sophie thinking of Cyneswith, istg..

Boy, that escalated quickly. I mean we literally went from first kiss ever to woohoo with 0 other interactions in between but after all those years of incelitude who can blame Shajar.

And it’s official!!! ❤️ I’ve been convinced these two belong together ever since they were teens but I was also convinced Gunther belonged with Melody/Daniel belonged with Brittany/Jojo belonged with Frances and we remember how all 3 of those went so only time will tell.

In the meantime let’s marvel at how uneven this burgeoning relationship is thanks to Shajar unilaterally obsessing over Sophie for half her teenhood. But she finally got her! An inspirational tale about never giving up on your dreams even when your dreams prefer your sister.