#apologies in advance.
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im feeling wild about cortex again.
you know what that means!
ART /ref
#comet rambles#comet's blasted bandicoot buffoonery#he's too hard to let go...#his laugh. his hair. his eyes. his voice. his personality. EVERYTHING IS UNRESISTABLE ABOUT HIM#IM DRAWING MORE OF HIM NOW EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP#apologies in advance.#the amount of drawing him you'll see will not be pretty. and if you have young children this would be a good time to leave the room /ref /j#I LOVE YOU NEO CORTEX YOU DESERVE MORE FANART RAAAHHHH RAAAAAHHHH
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hard stop punctuationâŠwho is she?
#if you see the shift in my writing from girl crush ch3 to ch4 i love you#also ch5 is insanely littered with big vocabulary and these guys:#; â : and commas#apologies in advance.#i donât know why i am the way i am#i donât know why im suddenly writing very flowy but uh. itâs happening#đ«§đȘŽ#wayli writes
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âWho the fuck does Ang Lee think he is, man?â
KNOCKED UP (âBrokeback Mountainâ Deleted Scene) | 2007 | dir. Judd Apatow
#(i'd like to apologize to everyone in advance for (giffing and posting) this)#knocked up 2007#moviegifs#fyeahmovies#doyouevenfilm#filmgifs#userfilm#userbbelcher#chewieblog#dailyflicks#userrobin#userconstance#userstream#usermarina#usersavana#cinemapix#filmtv#jonah hill#katherine heigl#myedit#don't misunderstand me! i love brokeback mountain just the way it is! ang lee is my friend#yeah there's also something to say about the movie being made in the early 2000s#and the double standard when portraying gay relationships onscreen as compared to portraying straight relationships#(if you're interested in that topic you should watch the documentary 'this film is not yet rated')#but i mostly giffed this bc i thought it was a funny deleted scene! and it goes on for longer than just this but i wasn't doing alladat!#(hence the link to watch the scene in full. mirror screened tho? idk but dailymotion's version is the right way round if that matters)#don't ask me how i found this clip in a better quality. it was hard. i was bored. i did it for the bit.
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The Pink Coffin Bag has arrived! Please welcome the pink pastel version of the Everyday Coffin Bag, as well as the Bat Wallet with some cute new inserts and enamel pins, now live on Kickstarter! And if you missed the opportunity to get a black coffin bag, now's your chance--I'm restocking them!! :D
#alternative fashion#pastel goth#halloween#kickstarter project#apologies in advance for the blaze spam I love this project a lot and want everyone to see it <3
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due to drug. reading comprehension is at an all time low.
#apologies in advance.#spent 5 minutes puzzling over a post#only to realize i read it completely wrong and thought it meant the opposite thing it said
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blood sports finale is today but I have a strict watch order so I cannot watch yet. sad! anyway if I see any spoilers I will make people blow up and die.
#IF I SEE THINGS THAT GET THROUGH MY TAGSâŠâŠâŠ expect my righteous anger#Thank you#apologies in advance.
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This dramatic bald guy again (I'm impatiently waiting for news from da4)
#Solas#dragon age inquisition#dragon age#da#fen'harel#emo edgy bald elf boy#I don't know who I will become when the game finally comes out#but I apologize in advance lmao
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[Day 163]
Will the pattern continue?
Everyone you have clo @clopiya to blame đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„
#dddaily4sherin#grian#goodtimeswithscar#but bros all flowers HSKAHAKjahaoah#desert duo#namemc spoilers#trafficblr#my art#i apologize in advance i honestly dont know how much damage this will do but i apologize and am running away at full speed#HEKEHKAJAJWHWJWWJWKHA#o7
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#there's no escape huh.#like a couple of weeks before da reawoke i had thought i had got deep into ff7. like real deep#deep enough that i posted 'well i hope da news will get me back to normal because this game drives me crazy' or smth like that. lol#my ff7 brainrot was bad. it made me really abnormal. but oh boy in comparison i was the sanest not at all obsessed person ever#when a couple of years ago i apologized in advance for a person i'd become after new dragon age. yeah i clearly foresaw that outcome#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard
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GOT WHAT YOU WANTED
summary: you're rafe's best friendâkelce and top's too, but there's always been something more between the two of you. neither of you will do anything about it. clearly, the solution is to become friends with benefits.
now spinning: too many nights by metro & future
word count: 11.5k
warning/tags: kook trio reader, using jj to make rafe jealous, mentions of drugs/partying, jealous/possessive rafe and reader, smut !, rafe deals coke. tysm to @zyafics for betaâing & helping me so muchh & @inimamea for being so lovely and supportive. tysm to all the lovely anons who have been supporting and loving this concept from the start, i hope u all love this ⥠(but sorry in advance if u donât)
truth be told, you didnât like making rafe angry.Â
it wasnât fun for you, like other things wereâwatching your boys play golf while you lounged in the cart with the cold drinks, picking out a pretty outfit for the day, crashing on the couch at tannyhill with your head in rafeâs lap and feet over kelceâs legs.Â
those were fun things. what you were doing now, with jj, was something borne of necessity. youâre not a mean girl. you find it tough to be mean to anyone except rafe, actually, and only because he dishes it back and you know his feelings arenât really hurt, but right now you were being mean.
to jj that is.Â
you smile at the blond boy seated next to you, the golden glow of the bonfire casting its warmth onto both of you. you laugh at another joke he makes, but only half-hearted, taking another sip of the beer heâd gotten you from the keg.
jjâs funny, heâs sweet too. itâs not his fault you wish you were seated next to your best friend instead of him, drinking a strawberry seltzer from the case that rafe keeps in the back of his truck specially for you.Â
âso?â jj asks, and you turn from staring at your shoes to look up at him. heâs looking at you with a smile, a very charming smile that you could have a lot of fun with, except youâre starting to feel bad about toying with him like this.Â
âso?â you repeat back, softly. he leans in a little to hear you. you feel a little warm at the action, but it could just as easily be from the fire.Â
jjâs niceâand youâve always liked nice, preferred it to almost anything. every boy you had ever introduced to your trio had been nice, though rafe hadnât ever cared. heâd hated them from the moment heâd laid eyes on them. you wonder now when you let him seep into your mind like this, with every other thought about rafe rafe rafe. somewhere in between accepting jjâs invitation to come to the bonfire with him and getting jealous over the fact that rafe was seeing some random girl.
âyou didnât tell your other boy about this, didâya?â you look up at jj with eyebrows knitted, puzzled.
âother.. boy?â
âcameron.â now you really flushâyou certainly donât want jj to think rafe is your other anything.
âno, no. weâre not dating. weâre just friends.â
âright, okay. you tell him about tonight?â
âno. it didnât come up.â
âah. got it.â
âwhy?â you ask, and before you can look around, jj stares into the distance, gesturing with his eyes to a blurry figure.
ânothinâ. heâs just been starinâ at us since we sat down, so i figured, but-â you stand up, looking into the distance where rafe was. you can feel yourself turning green with envy, red with rage, watching him stand next to the same girl heâs been with, her looking at rafe while rafe looks at you.
you sit back down on the log, wrapping a hand around jjâs arm and pulling him down to sit beside you. from this angle, rafe canât make out anything but your backs, and maybe the lack of any real distance between you and jj.
âsorry,â you say, sweetly, almost having regained your wrath the second you saw the two of them standing together. âheâs crazy.â
âsâokay. not news to me, princess.â jj takes a pause, and you chew your cheek, trying to decide how far you were willing to take this. âyou okay?â
âyes. why wouldnât i be?â
âwell, uh, it doesnât take a genius. even though, yâknow, i am one, to know somethinâs up.â âno, jj, i promise, weâre ju-â âjust friends, yeah, i got it. i mean, i donât know what type of friends exactly, but uh, i like you. and iâll like you even if he has a problem with it. so up to you, really.â you glance up at jj, who is being nicer to you right now than you deserve.Â
and you hate it, hate every second of it. you hate how rafe makes you feel, how angry and jealous you get, the fact that you even started talking to jj when in the back of your mind you knew it was because rafe would get upset over it.
but you also hate what rafeâs doing, the girl heâs with and the way heâs with her, the fact that he brought her here and still wonât stop shooting daggers into jjâs head. in short, you hate all of it.Â
you lean in, resting your head against jjâs shoulder.Â
âiâm sorry. i donât know whatâs going on with him. but, heâs here with a girl.â
âand youâre here with me.â jj wraps an arm around you.Â
âyes, but not because-well, i donât know.â it feels stupid coming out, but if jj thinks that, he doesnât show any signs of it.
âsâokay. donât always have to know.â you keep your head on his shoulder, enjoying the warmth he brings. âby the way, heâs still watching.â you smile, though you canât tell which boy elicited it. âi mean, not gonna complain if i get to be your boy toy for a little but, nice to know you care-â you giggle, pulling away to put your drink on the sandy ground.
âyouâre telling me you donât want a sugar mama?â he laughs at your words and you relish in it.Â
it could be picture perfectâwaves crashing in the back, the fire flickering in front of you, stars sparkling above. jj keeps his hand on your cheek and leans in for a kiss, and you find yourself leaning too, when the voice of your best friend breaks the silence. you pull away from jj to look up at rafe standing behind you.
âhey. weâre goinâ. câmon.â
ârafe-â you start, but you get interrupted. jj stands, facing rafe.
âhey buddy, weâre a little busy. but uh, iâll make sure she gets home safe-â
âguys-â
âwasnât fuckinâ talkinâ to you, pogue-â
âtuck her into bed, and everything. donât worry your little head âbout it-â
âmâgonna knock your little head out if you donât get the fuck away from-â having heard enough, you drag rafe away by his arm, your pretty nails digging in harshly.
âwhat the fuck was that, rafe?â you ask, though you feel the bitterness coursing through your veins. howâs that fairâthat he parades his girlfriend around you, at the club and here at the bonfire, but you canât so much as spend a moment alone with jj.Â
whatever reservations you had just held about using jj to make rafe jealous seem to have gone far away. instead youâre just angryâhe wants his own girlfriend and he wants you without a boyfriend too. you turn to look back at the boy you left behind at the fire. jj gives you a thumbs up.
âhow many times do i have to fuckinâ tell you to-to stay away from that pogue-â
âhe has a name,â you counter, so defensive because jj was being nice to you even when he didnât have to be, helping you even with no gain for himself. âand you canât order me around, okay? you brought a girl here but i canât talk to jayj? how does that make any sense?â
âstop yellinâ,â he barks, grabbing you by the arm now, and guiding you away.
âwhy? afraid someone might hear us? like your little girlfriend? whereâd she go, by the way, i bet sheâs missing you right about now-â
âshut up. shut it.â you donât realize how far rafeâs dragged you until you shake out of his tight grip, standing next to his truck on the street.
âiâm sick of this rafe.â it comes out quieter than you intend, tears prickling up. you hate crying, especially infront of the boys but even more so infront of rafe. âiâm not stopping my life and boys that i wanna see, and relationships i want to have because youâre not okay with it. not when you have your own girlfriend. itâs not fair.âÂ
âi donât. i donât have a girlfriend.â you roll your eyes, he watches it happen with a tight fist, jaw clenching.
âyes, you do.â
âno, i donât.â
âyou donât?â you question, unbelieving. âyou just.. walk around with the same girl for weeks. take her everywhere. but sheâs not your girlfriend?â youâre snarky like alwaysâyou still donât know if he likes it or not.
âno, sheâs not.âÂ
âbullshit. at least get your fucking story straight, rafe. that girlâs probably half in love with you-â âmânot dating her. and if it bothered you so much how come you didnât say something, huh? you pull this shit with fuckinâ maybank instead?â
âiâm not pulling anything with jj.â you lie through your teeth, hoping rafe bites. âi-i like him.â
âno you fuckinâ donât.â
âwho are you to tell me-â
âyou donât like him. what you like is makinâ me fuckinâ angry. well, it worked. stay the fuck away from him. and get in the goddamn truck.â
you groan loudly, the noise almost a scream and filling the quiet street. but you comply, getting into the passenger seat and letting rafe drive you homeâto your house, not tannyhill like every other night. when he pulls up to your house, you resist the urge to get out without saying anything at all.
âiâll see you tomorrow, kid.â you sigh, looking back up at rafe.
âthatâs it? youâll see me tomorrow?â
âwhat else do you want me to say, huh?â
âare you just gonna ignore all of that? what the hell was that?â
âmânot ignoring anything-â
âso, i canât see jj anymore. are you still seeing her? who am i allowed to date then? kelce? top? do you have a pre-approved list for me?â
âshut up.â
ârafe,â you sound serious, as serious as heâs ever heard you, shifting in your seat to look right at him. he looks back, his knuckles white on the steering wheel at the mention of you dating kelce or top or anyone. âiâm not gonna stay single forever. i know your alpha-male tendencies donât agree with it, but girls have needs too. i want-â
âwhat? what do you want?â
âthe possibility of getting laid without you screaming at every boy i talk to would be nice.â
âdonât talk like that.â
ârafe.âÂ
exasperated, you unlock the door and climb out, not turning back to say goodnight. the last twelve hours seem like a blur, between texting jj and actually seeing him and rafeâs reaction to it. youâre not sure what kind of reaction you really wanted out of him, but youâre not happy with the one you got. you donât know what, if anything, would have pleased you.Â
that night, you go to bed angry and wake up sad. jj texted you something but you canât find the heart to look at his message yet.Â
youâre sure the boys have something planned for today, like they always do, but the idea of opening the groupchat to look at what they decided on makes you feel sick. so you stay home instead, showering off yesterdayâs anger and wondering why rafe thinks you donât deserve to have a boy in your life to fool around with, to date, to do anything with.Â
the answer, sharp and painful like the jagged end of a piece of glass, hovers in your mind. you try to push it away.
rafeâs wrongâlike always. you really donât like making him angry, like it even less that your routine is disrupted and that for the first time in a long time, you donât want to see your best friends today. brushing your hair, the sound of your bedroom door opening snaps you out of your thoughts.
âcâmon kid. get dressed. topâs got tee time at two and we booked lunch before.â you turn to look at rafe but donât budge. he takes a look at youâdressed in one of his old frat shirts and plaid shorts that barely peak out.Â
you look pretty all the time but it feels the worst, the hardest to deal with, when itâs just the two of you alone like this, none of the shit that you do for other people, for outside the houseâthe makeup, the hair, the nice clothes. when youâre pretty like this itâs just for him, since no one else gets to see you, no one but him. you probably didnât even notice you were wearing one of his shirtsâsomething that leaves him feeling more pleased than he should be. but like always, heâs not gonna tell you any of that.
âare you adding deaf to stupid?â he asks, and you roll your eyes, letting out an irritated huff.
âiâm not coming. go away.â you turn around on your vanity chair to face your mirror, continuing brushing your hair. rafe walks up behind you, staring at you in the mirror.
âcâmon. lunch is at the place you like. iâll even talk to you when kelce and top are up.â
âis that your way of apologizing?â
âitâs not an apology.â
âof course itâs not. why would you say sorry? you probably donât think you did anything wrong.â
âi didnât.â
âmm-hm. when does rafe cameron ever do anything wrong?â you keep brushing your hair, staring at yourself in the mirror instead of at him. âpsycho.â
rafe yanks the brush from your hand, spinning your chair around to face him. he boxes you in, his hands resting on the armrests. heâs too close to you, it makes his head spin. you wish heâd stop, you know heâs not going to. you watch with bated breath, wondering whatâs coming next.
âi⊠didnât mean to make you upset.â you keep staring up at rafe, blinking fast. âand i didnât see it from your side. so, mâsorry. about that part. nothinâ else.â you canât help the slow smile that grows on your faceârafe, apologizing, and to you of all people. you thought youâd never see the day.
âthanks rafe.â
âalright. get ready. truckâs still runninâ.â he pulls himself upright, freeing you of the restraint. you can hear the bass of the music in his car, the future song audible from your open window.Â
âthatâs bad for the environment. and i didnât say i forgave you.â snatching the hairbrush back, you resume your motions. you hear rafe groan and itâs hard to hold back the smile. maybe you did like making him angry.
âkid.âÂ
âwhat? i heard your apology, and i donât accept it. hope you girls have fun at golf-â rafe leans back in, holding your jaw shut between his fingers.
âdo you ever shut up?â you shake your head from your position, though you canât really move. âwhatâs it gonna take, huh? you want my permission to fuck âround? sleep with some, some fuckinâ nobody? some pogue? tough shit. youâre not gettinâ it.â he lets you go, and you rub your jaw tenderly.
âbut you get to do it?âÂ
âthatâs different-â
âno itâs not! youâre just a dick. and sexist. who am i supposed to sleep with, then?â you shoot back.
âi donât fuckinâ know, kid. me, i guess. at this point-â
âha-ha funny. youâre an-â when you finally get up and look at him, heâs staring at you. âwhat?â
âyeah. thatâs fine.â he shrugs, like heâs just decided something trivial, like what to order at lunch or which iron to use. âyou can sleep with me.â
âexcuse me?â
âyeah. yeah, itâs a good solution. that way you can stay the fuck away from maybank and any other asshole.â
ârafe. shut up.â
âthink about it,â he says, and you fall silent to listen, though this is the worst idea youâve ever heard in your life. âyou get what you want. i get what i want. it works out.â
âhow is being your pity-fuck remotely close to what i want?â
âsheesh, kid mâtryna help you right now. offerinâ you a solution-â
ârafe?â âyeah?â
âget out.â you walk over the door, swining it open and waiting for him to step out.
âjust think âbout it,â rafe says, standing by the door but not leaving just yet. âalright?â
âgoodbye, rafe.âÂ
you listen to the soundsâhim walking down the staircase, the front door closing, his truck taking off. after youâre sure heâs gone, you let out a breath you didnât realize youâd been holding inside.
sleeping with rafe had been nothing more than a drunken thought that occasionally slipped into your mind when heâd be nice to you after some party. curling up next to him at tannyhill every other night certainly didnât help, but thatâs all it wasâa thought, not reality.Â
then you wonder if itâs really such a bad idea. maybe if you just got out all of this pent up energy with rafe, and then worked on finding someone he actually approved of, it would be easier for both of you.Â
key word: maybe.
the idea that heâs still seeing that girl, the one he keeps denying is his girlfriend, makes you want to puke. heâd have to stop that, that would be part of your agreement.Â
maybe rafeâs right, maybe you both get what you want out of this, as messed up as it seems. it canât be the worst idea in the worldâkelce and top always joke the two of you are half a couple already.
you go to your closet to pick out an outfit for golf, hoping you werenât about to ruin your friendship with your best friend.
.âïž ĘË
rafeâs leaning against the bar at the club when you find him. you think heâs got a weird sixth sense, he always knows when youâre around, and he looks up before youâre even near him.Â
âi knew you wouldnât pass on lunch. top owes me five bucks.â
âyeah. sure.â you put a hand on the counter to steady yourselfâthis is harder than you thought it would be. rafe takes a sip of his drink. you want to chastise him, tell him itâs only twelve-thirty and too early for drinking, but nothing comes out. your mouth feels dry and you almost want to chug the rest of his scotch. surprisingly, you refrain.
âwhat?â rafe asks, and you glance up at him, eyes locked.
âi thought about what you said this morning. what you offered.â
âand?â the bastard looks so smug. you should the slap the smirk off his face but you know what heâs thinkingâproud of coming up with the idea himself, thinking heâs doing such a service.
âand.. better the devil you know and all that.â you wait for the other shoe to drop for a moment, for rafe to admit it was all a big prank and you fell for it, and now the boys owe him money or something.
âgood. i agree. so should we get outta here, or what?â
âright now?â you question, eyes widening. âwhat about tee time?â
âyouâre the only whoâs so horny youâre on the verge of jumping pogues. mâjust tryna help you-â
âshut up!âyour face heats, looking around to make sure no one heard him. âby the way, between the two of us youâre the only one jumping pogues.â
âyeah, yeah. so not now, then?â
âa gentlemen as always, rafe. no, really, thank you, for showing me chivalryâs not dead.â you roll your eyes again, staring ahead at the bottles behind the bar. you donât want to turn and look at rafe again, but you do.
âat this rate mâgonna have to show you what friends with benefits means too.â
âshut up.â it comes out like a hiss this time, narrowed eyes focusing in on your best friend and apparently, new fuck buddy.
âyeah, yeah. theyâre at the table near the window.âÂ
âthanks.â you walk in that direction, catching a glimpse of top and kelce, but your feet pause for a moment. you stay still, but glance back at rafe.
heâs not leaning against the bar anymoreâheâs facing you, staring at you. blue eyes rake over your skin top to bottom, focusing on the pretty sandals and polished white toes, smooth lotioned skin, your short white skirt and tight golf shirt, with one too many buttons popped.Â
when youâre talking without ever shutting up, itâs hard for him to focus on anything but your glossy lips or long eyelashes fluttering when you roll your eyes. but now heâs taking it inâhow easily you agreed to this little idea, how you talk a big game but you donât seem as hesitant or upset as you were this morning.Â
you turn back and keep walking towards the tableârafe can tell youâre flushed. heâs fine with it, prefers it this way. anythingâs better than you going on dates with strangers, showing them looks and emotions and other things that belong to him.
if youâre horny, all you had to do was tell him. downing the rest of his drink, he goes back to the table and like always, sits next to you.Â
kelce and top talk about the same old shit, until they focus their attention on you. youâre being quiet, not nearly as talkative or snippy as usual, and you havenât said a word to rafe the whole time.
âand whereâd you two go off to last night?â kelce asks, pointedly looking at rafe while he asks you the question.
âyou guys know you left us stranded, right? we all came together. i mean iâm not saying self-absorbed but-â topper adds, but you cut him off.
âyouâre really not one to talk about self-absorbed, are you top?â you shoot back, and kelce chokes on his water.Â
âeasy,â rafe says, and normally youâd fire away something at him too, but this time you donât. âwe had somethinâ to take care of. but you got home didnât you?â
âyes, but-â topper says, but rafe cuts him off again. you hold back a laugh.
âthen shut up âbout it.â
âkelceâs mom had to pick us up. it was humiliating.â you snort into your lemonade, all four of you bursting into laughter. you turn to ask kelce a follow up question, and rafeâs staring at you while you laugh. something low in your stomach twists, like a butterfly trying to fly out and away.
when kelce and rafe start talking about the course today, topper leans in to say something to you.
âyouâre getting mean. yâknow that means youâre spending too much time with him.â you transfer your gaze from top to rafe, staring at the boy next to you.Â
the idea of what you would normally say floats through your headâsomething funny and earnest but still making top feel better, not saying sorry but making him laugh instead. nothing comes to mind.
âyeah. i guess i am.â
you sit through golf, reading your book in the cart while the boys play nine holes. your phone rings with a call from your parents about an hour in, and when you step away to take it, rafe follows you. the boys protest from the distanceâit must have been his turn.
âyou goinâ home?â rafe questions, and you jolt at the sound, not realizing he was right behind you.
âgod. you scared me.â he doesnât say anything, just keeps staring down at you. âyes, uh, mom wants me home for something.â
âyou need a ride?â
âno, i drove here, remember?âÂ
âoh. yeah. am i gonna see you tonight?â the words make you flushâstupidly, no matter how hard you try to fight it, knowing that they shouldnât. the two of you are going to be terrible at this. âkid?â
âcareful, rafe. youâre starting to sound like a boyfriend.â âyeah. and we wouldnât want that, now would we?âÂ
sucking in a breath, tearing your gaze away with pretty blue eyes that are looking at you like maybe that wouldnât be the worst idea in the world, youâre at a loss for words again. before all of this drama, you could count the amount of times you had been rendered speechless by rafe with no handsâsince it had never happened. still with nothing to say, you turn around and start to walk away. foot steps follow you.
âhey, hey. mâjoking, itâs just.. a joke. how about i come over later? and weâll talk about it.â you spin on your heels to face him.
âtalk about it? talk about what?â
âour.. arrangement. yâknow talk about it..â he tilts his head stupidly and you canât decide if you want to slap him or kiss him. â..fuck about it.â
âokay! thatâs it. bye, rafe.â storming away, you almost wish you hadnât heard what he called out after you.
âbye, kid. iâll see you later.â
.âïž ĘË
at ten pm that night, freshly showered and somehow in another one of rafeâs shirts, you were back to where you were this morningâbrushing your hair. rafe doesnât knock on your door, just barges in.
âoh my god-â
âhello to you too.â he steps in, shutting the door behind him and taking a seat on your bed. you spin on your chair to face him.
âhow the hell do you keep getting in here?â
âwhat? your mom let me in.â
âyou didnât even text-â
âi told you at the club. you have selective memory, kid.â he looks you over again. ânice shirt.â
âoh shut up.â you turn away for a moment, setting the hairbrush down, biting your cheek. âso?â
âso?â he repeats. heâs smiling, you can just tell.
âarenât we gonna talk about our arrangement? thatâs what you told me at the club-â you finish in a mocking voice.
âwhat else is there to talk about? you wanna get laid, i donât wanna see you with random guys.â
âi still donât understand whatâs wrong with the guys that i-â rafe cuts you off, and he sounds angry.
âof course you donât understand. you donât haveât think about this shit, because i think about it for you. whatâd you gonna do when some guy starts sleepinâ with you âcause me and top pissed him off once? or one of those pogues, huh? to get back at us? take some video of you and send it to everyone? brag and show it off to everyone?â
âoh.â
âexactly. so mâlookinâ out for you. this is better, trust me.â the thing rafeâs saying are making sense. you were on board anyways, but you feel better that thereâs a real reason behind it.
âbut what about that girl-â you ask, though you donât know what kind of answer youâre expecting. rafe sighs.
âwhat about that girl?â
âare-are you gonna sleep with other people too?â
âno. mâtoo busy anyways. works out for both of us.â
âoh. okay. promise?â
âwhen have i ever lied to you?â you sigh, about to protest, when he finishes his sentence. âpromise.â you feel strangely reassured, like this is a good idea.
âokay. thanks.â you dodge his gaze, playing with your manicured nails, pink this time.
âalright. get on the bed.â
ârafe-â
âwhat? i just said-â
âyouâre not even gonna, like, take me out for dinner first?â
âwho the hell dâyou think paid for your lunch?â
âi donât know.. kelce? he got lunch last week. should i go sleep with him next?â
âha-ha. get on the bed.â
âugh. youâre so crass. i donât even know how you get any girls-â
âyeah, yeah. are you gonna shut up now or what?â
you canât think of anything to say, so you finally follow his instructions, crawling into your bed and sitting up against your pillows to look at rafe.Â
youâve see him naked before. heâs seen you naked before. with all the time you spent together on the druthers or at the beach, you should be used to seeing him like this. he yanks off his shirt, pulling it off with a fist in the back over his head.Â
the first sign that this idea wasnât going to go as planned should have been nowâfeeling your breath catch in your throat at the sight in front of you. your best friend shirtless, getting closer to your bed. your eyes rake over tan, muscled skin and the silver chain glimmering around his neck. you donât realize you moved, body sliding down and back flat against your mattress while rafe starts to lean across the bed, his hand planted next to your head.
rafeâs hovering over you. your breathing shakes for a moment, wondering if it would be this easy for him to do this with any other girl. you dismiss the thought when rafe leans in to kiss you, but it almost seems too wrong to let it happen.
âwait-â you move your head a little so your lips are away from rafeâs. âare you sure? you donât think itâs gonna be weird?â
âstop bugging out, kid.â he says it low and quiet, and your entire body quivers from the sound.
âanswer the question, asshole.â rafe laughs, his hot breath fanning across your cheek. you canât help it, you laugh too, turning to look at him. you think heâll be grinning like somethingâs funny, but your smile dies the second you lock eyes.
heâs not smiling, he looks as serious as youâve ever seen him. he licks his lips, moving his eyes over your body, his shirt and your bare legs.
âyou wearinâ anything under this?âÂ
he moves one of his hands from your knee to your thigh, stroking the soft skin. you curl your leg automatically, head lifting to watch his hands and your entire body trembling under his touchâitâs hot and electric, making your heart beat faster and the hairs on your arm stand up. he looks up from your legs to your face, watches you shake your head to answer no.Â
âgood girl.âÂ
your head falls back onto the pillow when the words leave his mouth. a chuckle leaves his mouth, but still heâs not smiling, itâs more just a noise of pleasure than anything else. rafe sits up between your legs, hands grabbing onto both of your legs and stroking again. he makes his way all the way to your hips, fingers dancing over the waistband of your panties.Â
you think heâll stop, maybe at least answer your earlier question, though you canât remember what you had even asked him. he doesnât, fingers swiftly hooking around the fabric and pulling them down your legs. you suck in another breath, angling your foot so they fall onto the bed while you keep your eyes locked on him.
âyâready?â he asks, and you nod, though youâre not sure what youâre agreeing to. his hands go back to your thighs, pushing his t-shirt up to expose more skin. you tense up, but he keeps a palm on your knee. ârelax.â
before you can anticipate anything else, he strokes your pussy, which is shamefully wet already, with two fingers, prodding the sensitive skin and gathering wetness. he does that laugh again, like he canât believe what heâs looking at, and you try to shut your trembling thighs in embarassment, but rafe holds them open.
ârafe-â but before you can finish your sentence, two thick fingers plunge inside you, âoh my godâ!âÂ
âhah. good.â when he pushes his fingers out, just to slam them back in, your eyes roll all the way back, another loud moan emitting from your mouth, sounds heâs thought about a hundred times before but still canât compare to the real thing. but of course, you donât need to know any of that. âdonât get too loud. yâfolks are downstairs, remember?â
you donât seem to remember. when he picks up the pace, really just wanting to test you and see how much you could take, you start moaning even louder, sweet breathy sounds filling the room. theyâre just for him, and normally heâd want you screaming, but he canât arouse too much suspicious, or your parents wonât ever let him back in the house. his other hand, the one holding your legs open, moves to your mouth, clamping his palm over your lips to keep your noises quiet.
you must like it, you clench around his fingers and your walls flutter when he locks eyes with you, almost hunched over you to keep you quiet while still fucking his fingersânow three, though he didnât realize when heâd added anotherâinto you.Â
rafeâs hard, and he canât remember the last time he was patient enough to wait to get his dick wet, but he likes you like this, not just shutting up for once, but eyes shut and face twisted with pleasure, whimpering into his hand, legs shaking in his grip while youâre wet around his fingers.Â
ârafe-â you mumble, the sound all muffled. âmâgonna, ohh-â he picks up the pace, shushing you while battering into your pussy, listening to the gasps and whimpers through his palm while you cum all over his hand.Â
limbs like jelly and throat dry, you lay there, catching your breath. your skinâs hot and flushed, and you stare at rafe while he stares at you.
âwhat?â you question, and it comes out quiet, soft, like youâve done something you shouldnât have. heâs thinking a couple of things, some of which have no business being in his head at all. do you always get this wet? who else has seen you like this? whoâs gonna get to hear you moan the way you just did for him some day?
ânothinâ.âÂ
âoh. okay.â you sit up against your headboard, pulling yourâhisâshirt down to cover up a little. âwell, thank you.â
âyeah. no problem.â for a second he hestiatesâbriefly concerned you want him to leave now. âwell? come on.â youâre trying to sound like you always do, a little irritated at him, a little snarky. he can see through it this time.
âwhat?âÂ
âget the condom. youâre the one who said weâre doing it today.â rafe watches for a second, wondering if he should laugh or yell at you, when you pull off his shirt. he stares at you, not moving, wondering why he thought this would be a good idea.Â
heâs seen you naked before, changing in the same room or when you two lost all boundaries and started walking into bathrooms while the otherâs showering, but this seems different. propped against your headboard naked, with your cum on his fingers, asking him to get a condom. now that heâs seen you like this, he has a new life mission of making sure no one else ever gets to.Â
âgod, youâre such a boy.â
âshut up.âÂ
âyou shut up. you talked such a big game and now youâre just staring at my boobs-â he moves quickly, fingers on your jaw, actually shutting you up.
âlie down.â biting your lip, you comply, sliding down so rafe was on top of you. âspread your legs.â you move to do so, but rafe uses his hands on your thighs to pull them apart before you can. you canât look at his face, it almost feels too weird, so you decide to stare at his dick instead, watching him roll the condom on with a puzzled face.
âwhat?â heâs been looking at your face the whole time.
ânothing. if i had known you were this big i wouldâve asked a while ago-â rafe starts laughing, a real one this time, and you burst into giggles too.
âstop-â and he gets closer to you, lining himself up with your wet cunt, â-making me laugh. shut up.â
âyouâve said shut up like thirty times but you wonât stop talking eithe-oh!â he pushes in all at once, and all the breath leaves your lungs. you gasp instead, toes curling, feeling incredibly full, the disbelief that youâre full of rafe quickly fading away.Â
you should have known heâd be good at this, good enough to actually get you to shut up. he starts a slow pace, thrusting in and out and you look up to see your best friendâs face contorted with pleasure, heavy breaths in your ears and the scent of his cologne overwhelming everything. his chain dangles on your neck, tickling you, and you try to permanently engrain the feeling into your memory.
you attempt to stay quiet, though the slam of the headboard against the wall is a dead giveaway. rafe pushes all the way out and then all the way back in with another slam, and thereâs nothing you can do but take it, clamping your hand over your mouth now.
he manhandles your legs into place, pressing them to your chest while he continues the exhausting pace. you canât discern anything but rafeâs quiet groans and heavy breaths. youâve just cum but it doesnât take long for that hot feeling to wind up again in your stomach, toes curling and eyes getting watery. your moans are still muffled, but the way rafeâs looking at you is only making them get louder.Â
your bottom lip must be bleeding from the way your teeth have been abusing it. rafe moves your hand out of the way and leans in for a hot kiss, his tongue in your mouth and swallowing all of your noises.
with a final oh god, oh god, oh god, moaned into rafeâs mouth, you cum hard around his dick, eyes pressing shut and stray tears falling down, rafeâs lips not leaving yours.Â
you donât know whyâbut you wrap your arms around his neck, keeping the kiss going. rafe pulls away for a moment to breathe and you open your eyes, staring up at him through wet lashes, licking your swollen lips, while he looks back down at you.
he leans in for a final kiss, groaning into your mouth while he spills into the condom, still thrusting in and out of your sore pussy.Â
rafe rolls off of you, resting on your sheets beside you. you try to catch your breath.
âyou didnât last very long.âÂ
âand how long did it take ya to cum all over my fingers?â
âoh, whatever. whereâs my shirt?â
âitâs my shirt,â rafe says back, finding the discarded clothing on the ground and tossing it on your chest. you sit up, sliding his shirt back on. rafeâs standing, pulling on his shorts.
âare you leaving?â you ask, and you regret it the second it comes out, quiet and soft like you want him to stay.Â
you do want him to stay, but you donât want him to know that you do. it all feels very complicated and your thighs are aching, your throat dry.Â
âno.â he sits back down next to you, swinging an arm over your shoulder like he always does. you lean into his chest.Â
âyou kissed me,â you say quietly. youâre glad your face is pressed into his side, you donât think you could handle looking at his face right now. âand you were quiet. i didnât expect that.â
âyour parents are downstairs, remember?â
âoh. i forgot.â you realize after that you donât want him to know he fucked you so hard you forgot where you were and who was home.
âis kissing off limits?â rafe asks, and you almost choke processing the sentence. things you never thought rafe would say to you.â
âno.. it was nice.â you pause, listening to the silence of the room and the thud of rafeâs chest in your ear. youâre no expertâthough you fear youâre about to become oneâbut it seems faster than normal. âyou want ice cream? or cookies? i made some yesterday.â
âno, kid. itâs fine.â you chew your cheek nervously. you want rafe to want to stay, not just because you asked.
âyou can go.. if you need to.â you look up at him and then look back down when he meets your eyes.Â
âwhy? got nowhere else to be.â
âoh. okay.â
âturn the tv on. weâll watch your stupid movieâ
âreally?â your face lights up, grabbing the remote on your nightstand. you open up the blanket at the foot of the bed, covering both of you while you try to find youâve got mail. you go back to your position and lean against rafeâs warm body, and he presses a kiss to your forehead. itâs not unusual, heâs done it before, but you donât miss the fact that heâs decided to do it now. you try to push away the warm feeling blooming in your chest.
âdonât ever make a joke about sleeping with kelce or top again.â
.âïž ĘË
your tired muscles wake up to the sun pouring into your bedroom. the light shines on rafeâs still-asleep figure, but you knew it wouldnât wake him up, nothing ever does. you donât remember falling asleep, barely remember anything after rafe showing up.
and the part where you slept with your best friend.
a guilt-trip dangles on the edge, about to take over, when you push it away and focus on the text messages on your phone instead.
top: rafe canât believe u bailed on cod. u better be dead in a ditch somewhere
kelce: maybe princess finally killed him
top: stop hanging out without us
kelce: top lets just pull up next time
you laugh, and rafe stirs at the sound. you give his arm a shove.
âyou ditched playing video games for me? iâm so flattered, rafey.âÂ
âshut up.â he grumbles. âgo back to bed. sâtoo early for this shit.â
âitâs nine in the morning. and i have pilates in an hour.â
rafe turns over, and you canât deny itâs nice to have him in your bed for onceâit seems like youâre always sleeping at tannyhill.
âdidnât get enough exercise last night? you need more?â
you fake a yawn, covering your mouth.
âexercise? what exercise? i donât remember that. you mean the boring sex?â
rafe sits up, facing you. you choke back a laugh.
âyou wanna say that again?â
âuhh-â
âin fact, why donât you try and get up? ten bucks says you canât even walk to the door.â
âi canât believe the two of us even fit on this bed with your gigantic ego-â
âdonât see you walking. mâwaiting.â you toss one of your throw pillows at him.
âget out!â
âalright. iâll say good morning to your parents on my way-â
âokay! wait, stay.â
âsâwhat i thought.â
âsome way to say good morning,â you mumble, scrolling through your other messagesâa text from your other friends about a party tomorrow and a reminder for your pilates class.
âyou woke me up.âÂ
âoh whatever. i was just surprised you skipped a video game for this. but i guess most boys would.â
âthereâs not much i wouldnât skip for you.â you smile at rafe, misunderstanding him.
âthatâs so nice. are you saying iâm a great lay?â he rolls his eyes.
âiâm trying to- shut up. whatâd they say?â he picks up his phone.Â
about twenty minutes later, after checking the hallway (and that too on wobbly legs, just like the smug idiot had predicted) rafe leaves. like always, he says heâll see you later.
you fall on your bed and dwell on the fact that rafe kissed you last night. itâs hard to focus on anything else, and with every passing second, you think this whole thing was a worse and worse idea.
but he doesnât seem to think that way. he seemed fine. heâs better at the no-strings-attached thing than you, and you donât think he would have suggested it if he didnât think you could handle it.Â
with that thought lingering, you get dressed for pilates and hope itâs easier to walk before you see the boys again. you find out that itâs really not.Â
after your class, you check your phone, finding messages from top and kelce. game night and pizza at kelceâs house. youâre invited, of course, but you shoot them a message saying youâre staying home with your parents instead.Â
the second you press send, rafeâs contact photo lights up your screen.
ârafe?â you answer it without even waiting.
âwhat, not cominâ tonight? you always come.â
âoh, um-â you pace around your room, trying to think of a lie on your feet. âmom and dad wanted to stay in. you know. game night.â the words feel stupid, though you hope heâll believe it.
âokay. you gonna swing âround after?â
âno, probably not. um, iâll see you tomorrow?â
âyeah, tomorrow. have fun, kid.â
âyou too. tell them i say hi.â
the rest of your day flies by and itâs not long before youâre curling up in bed with a tub of ice cream. your parents went out to dinner with some friends, while you contemplated what the hell you were doing with your own friends.
you four always had a standing date on saturday mornings in the summerâsnacks and a spin on the boat. if you donât go, itâs going to be incredibly obvious something was going on with you.Â
you call topper while you pack your boat bagâgrabbing the necessities the boys always completely forget about; spray sunscreen, an extra baseball cap, a book for you when you inevitably get bored of listening to them talk.
âwhatâs up?â top says, and youâve made your way into the kitchen, pulling out fruit to wash and cut.
âwhat time are we going on the boat? and iâm bringing strawberries and mangoes, is that fine?â topper is the pickiest when it comes to the fruitâkelce and rafe will eat whatever you bring.
âuh, i think noon. call rafe, weâre taking the druthers today.â crap. thatâs what you were trying to avoid. it feels crazy the second you think itâtrying to avoid rafe. you need to get it together. acting like some love sick girl over your best friend feels like the stupidest thing youâve ever tried to do. he must bring it out in you. âdo you have any of those oranges? the little ones?â
âiâll bring âem. listen, i need to get ready, do you know the time? iâll just meet you there.â your self-realization is going to have to wait for another day.
ânoon, yeah. iâll text it.â
âthanks top.âÂ
you start an internal monologue on repeatâstop being weird about it. heâs still your best friend. be normal. he is not your boyfriend. you repeat it, but still pick out the prettiest bikini you own, yellow gingham and held together entirely by straps youâve tied into pretty bows. you throw on one of the boysâ button-ups thatâs ended up in your closet somehow on top.Â
walking onto the pier, you hesitate in front of the druthers. you donât hear any of the boys, and though nothingâs stopped you from getting on and making yourself comfortable, you wait for a second.
itâs like he knows. rafe steps out from the bridge, and takes one look at you, eyes flicking up and down your body and taking in the yellow fabric thatâs barely covering anything, before offering you his hand to get on.Â
âhey.â
âhey.â you look around. ânice weather.â
âyeah.â
âkelce and top running late? he told me noon.â
âthose two are always late.â heâs staring at you, and this time it becomes clear, that heâs looking at you the way a boy who has been inside of you looks at you.
âi packed mangoes. you liked them last time.â
âyeah, i did.â
âi just hope theyâre sweet.â
âyeah. they probably are. sweet.â rafe keeps looking, and you turn around to set your bag down. âlisten, kid-â
âitâs a great day. good weather.âÂ
âyou already said that.â
âoh.â
âwould you stop and look at me?â
âno, um,â you start, emptying out your bag onto one of the seats. âsorry, iâm busy.â you feel rafe grab your shoulder, turning you around. heâs not as rough as he could be, like he usually is.
âyou okay?â he asks, and you feel stupid.
âiâm fine.. are you okay?â
âyeah. but youâre actinâ weird.â
âwell yeah, rafe. we slept together. itâs weird.â
âyou were on board-â
âi was. i am,â you clarify. surprising even to yourself, you think you still are. âdoesnât make it not weird. imagine if you and kelce slept together. wouldnât it be weird?â rafeâs face twists into a mixture of disgust and concern. âokay. bad example. sorry.â
âyeah. mâjust saying, i wanna make sure youâre okay. but i donât regret it if thatâs what youâre afraid of. and nothinâ has to change.â hearing him say it makes you feel better. you repeat the words, tasting the feel of it on your tongue.
âright. nothingâs changed. youâre still rafe. iâm still me.â
âit doesnât have to happen again, if you donât want it to.â you stare up at him with crossed arms.
âwhy are you being so nice about it?â
âjeez, kid. what, you-you want me to be a dick âbout it? sounds like youâd prefer that.â
âno, just. itâs weird when youâre nice.â you look at him for a second before the two of you start laughing. âyâknow what i mean.â
âalright. iâll stop being nice.â
âthank you. now where are these two? i wanna read my book.â
âprobably still sleepinâ. played until-â rafe keeps talking, but you realize youâre only half paying attention. he takes his shirt off, and at the very sight of his chain sparkling in the sun, you realize youâre no better than the girls who chase after him. âwhat?â
âhm?â a little dazed, you look up from his abs to his face.
âyouâre starinâ.â
âoh. you think we have enough time before they show up?â
âtime for what?â rafe stares at you while you stare at him. âoh.â
turns out he thought you did have enough time. you end up with your cheek pressed against the tan sofa in the cabin, body folded with your head down and ass up. rafeâs slamming into you from behind, and though itâs only the second time with him, you think thereâs no pleasure in the world comparable.
from this angle he feels even bigger than yesterday. you feel tighter, or maybe itâs just the way your cunt is sucking him in, he thinks, thrusting in and out with his hands grabbing the fat of your ass, watching it bounce with every one of his motions. he has an urge to untie your bikini top, just so he can look at the expanse of the bare skin of your back, but he knows youâll fuss if he does. he settles for shoving the thin yellow fabric of your bottoms to the side, yanking it so hard that youâre scared itâll rip.
âbeâohâcareful,â you get out in between moans, louder than the first time and louder still than he thought youâd be. he likes it more than he should. you already came once, but he wants to see if he can get another out of you.
âshut up,â rafe groans, eyes fixated on your perky ass, the one heâs stared at in hundreds of short dresses and tiny skirts, bikinis that he shouldnât let you wear and panties he gets an eyeful of when youâre asleep in his bed. âjusâ take it-â
you keep moaning against the couch, head shoved in to muffle what you can, but itâs when you look back at him, turning your head to watch rafe slam into you with wet, lustful eyes, tired from how hard he had just made you cum, that he really canât take it, finishing hard and fast while you let out pretty mewls that are still ringing in his ear.Â
he pulls out, adjusting your bikini bottoms to cover you up, though thereâs visible wetness staining them. your inner thighs are shiny where your juices glisten. rafe has to tear his eyes away, you keep your legs clamped shut.
âyou okay?â he asks, trying to catch his breath. you donât speak, just nod. âcâmon.â rafe offers you a hand, again, and you accept, following him outside and into the sun, even though youâre so tired you could fall asleep where you were.
âthanks.â you say, wiping your neck of the sweat that has collected there. he watches you do it. âsorry, i donât have a tip or anything. how about some fruit instead? call it even?â âshut up, kid. mânot a hooker, you fuckinâ weirdo.â
âno, of course not,â you gasp, like youâd never suggest such a thing. âthe correct term is escort, rafe. itâs all very american gigolo.â
âyou watch too many movies.â but you still hear him laugh when the two of you step onto the deck.Â
âwhatâs so funny?â you hear topâs voice, freezing up. you catch rafeâs eye, before looking away
ânothinâ, man-â rafe starts, but you start talking over him.
âjust debatinâ how long it would take you idiots to get ready. got enough gel there, top?â rafe and kelce laugh while topper narrows his eyes at you.
your days are on the boat are always funâthe boys steer while you enjoy the breeze and the sun. you pass the fruit around and read your bookâanother romance beach read, of course. this oneâs about two best friends falling in love. you canât find the will to keep reading.
you tune in a conversation about a party tonight.
âare we going?â you ask, looking expectantly at the three boys in front of you.
âyeah. why wouldnât we?â kelce says. you shift your gaze to rafe, who gestures to your thighs with his eyes. you clamp your legs shut, flushing.
âfun. what time?â
.âïž ĘË
finding a little hard to walk straight after your little tryst on the boat, you switch your heeled sandals for a pair of sneakers for tonight. you smooth out your pretty blue dress in the back of topâs jeep. him and kelce are in the front, you and rafe in the back, pulling up to whichever family that was off-islandâs mansion for the evening. the music was blaring, audible from even down the street, with two boys carring a keg into the house while top parked.
âare they celebrating something?â you question, staring at the crowds of people inside.
âyeah. the fact that itâs saturday night,â kelce answers, and you shove the back of his head from the backseat.Â
you hear rafe and top talking about something, though you canât make it out. yesterday you thought, dreading when the boys swung by your house to get you, that it would be awkward to sit next to rafe and act like nothing had happened. surprisingly after the conversation this morning, you find that itâs not. he leaned over to open the door for you to get in, asked you how your class was, did the things he always did.
topperâs an idiot for boosting his wheels, and youâd told him as much when he showed you guys for the first time. getting down is a nightmare, even more in your sore state (which you are attributing to the pilates and not the boy sitting next to you right now).Â
you turn to look at rafe again but heâs not there, and instead you see him in your window, opening the door and offering you a hand to get down. rafeâs probably helped you down a dozen times. this feels different, you admit to yourself, holding onto his hand to get down and keenly aware of his other hand hovering around your waist.
inside, the party is in full swing, one corner by the windows with billows of smoke and a group of boys in another corner mixing drinks.Â
the four of you end up like alwaysâdivided into half on opposite ends of a painted pong table from someoneâs old frat house. some girl topâs been talking to makes her way over, hanging off his arm before long. rafe watches you toss the white ball, your nose scrunching up in concentration. you cheer when it goes in, turning to hug kelce. youâve only had two cups but youâre getting tipsy already, he can tell.
âtop. top!â rafe shouts over the music, but heâs too busy talking to the girl to notice.
âman, heâs clearly busy,â kelce says with a laugh.
âi agree. looks like that oneâs for you, rafe.â you look at him with a giddy smile, leaning forward on the table, palms pressed flat. he wishes you wouldnâtâhe can see down the front of your dress from this angle. you cheer when rafe chugs the cup of cheap beer.
he should make the next one just to get back at you, but he doesnât want you to get too drunk. instead he misses, the ball falling right into kelceâs hands.Â
if you were sober, youâd roll your eyesâyouâd recognize that rafe missed on purpose. heâs better at this than all of you combined.
âgive me five,â rafe says to top, casting one more glance back at you and kelce before walking towards a group of people on the couches and fishing something out of his pocket.
heâs gone, at most, ten minutes, and returns to find kelce missing. his place is taken by some brunette boy, who is currently trying to show you the best way to toss the ball. heâs standing awful close, a hand on your shoulder, his gaze on your exposed skin while you stare at the red cups.
âwho the fuck is this?â rafe barks, though with the music blasting, only topper can hear him.
âi dunno, kelce ran off with that chick heâs been hooking up with-â the white ping pong ball lands in the red cup closest to rafe. he hopes he doesnât look up to see something thatâs gonna piss him off, but itâs dashed in secondsâyou hugging the stranger in glee that you made another shot.Â
he swings around the table, shooting a glare at the boy while putting himself in between the two of you. he faces the boy first.
âget lost.â the boy tries to say something, but rafe interrupts before he can get a word out. âget. lost.â you watch him scramble away, rafe turning to face you.
âcâmon. weâre done with pong.â
âbut i made the last one!â
âi said weâre done. yâlucky i donât take your ass home.â
âwe just got here. why would you take me home?â you question.
for all the big talk, all the jokes and banter and emotions youâre trying to bury, you still donât understand the simple truth known to everyone thatâs ever met you and rafeâheâs never going to be happy seeing you with any boy besides himself.
âwhatâs wrong?â you question softly, looking up at him with big, confused, drunk eyes, not snarky like he thought you might be.
âno. just.. stop talkinâ to strangers, sâall.â
âbut he was nice!â you yell over the music, picking up another cup from the table and taking a sip. you hate beer, but they took topâs jeep and not rafeâs truck, so thereâs no spiked seltzer here for you.Â
âno he wasnât.â he takes the cup from your hand, pouring half the beer out into another cup before shoving it back in your hand.
âyeah he was! donât you want that? the sooner i find a nice guy we can stop all of this, right?â you look at him earnestly, before chugging the rest of your beer.Â
âalright, youâre cut off.â
the rest of the night goes by the same as all the othersâkelce and top into a competition to see who can get more drunk, you tipsy enough to talk loudly about anything that comes to mind and rafe scaring away any guy who stares at you for too long. you stare at rafeâs back when he goes to sell, watching a pretty girl touch his arm when heâs counting the cash sheâs handed him.Â
you look away since you feel the beer coming back up, anger bubbling. you focus on topper, trying to follow along with his nonsensical conversation about his ex-girlfriend.
âdonât worry,â kelce says, and you turn your gaze on him, confused. âhe didnât even look at her.â
âwhat?â but his eyes arenât on you, glancing behind you. you turn, though you shouldnât, looking at rafe, two girls laughing at something while he opens the little white packet for them. glancing at kelce, and then at top, who is keeled over on the sofa, nursing a half-empty bottle of tequila just by himself, you walk over to where rafe is.
âwait, donât-â kelce calls out after you, but you donât listen.
ârafe, i think topâs ready to go. are you?â you interrupt his conversation with the two girls, and though you despise the fact that youâre doing this, you realize kelce was right. he wasnât even looking at them. you gesture at your two other best friends on the couch, kelce trying to yank the bottle from topâs grip.
âyeah, kid. câmon, this place is dead anyways.â you smile, though you shouldnât let rafe see it. no, your smile is for the girls. you feel an unparalled joy when rafe swings his arm around you, guiding you back to the couch.Â
you shouldnât look back, but you do. the girls look mad and you feel happy.
this is fuckedâthe very thought sobers you. you shouldnât be happy that those girls think thereâs something between you and rafe, but you are.Â
rafe manhandles topper into standing up, while kelce turns to talk to you. heâs drunk, and it comes out like a laugh. you smile, thinking heâs going to make some joke about top and tequila.
âyouâre just as toxic as he is. hah. and i thought rafe was bad-â
âwhat?â you ask, but rafe cuts you off before you can figure out what kelce means.
âkelce, itâs your job to make sure he doesnât puke in the back.â
âman, why am i always on top watch-â
in the car, you pick the music while rafe drives. you notice he keeps an eye out in the backseat, with topâs head half out the window and kelce texting on his phone.
âdid you sell a lot?â you ask. youâve never really mentioned it before, so rafe didnât expect it tonight.
kelceâs words linger in your head. if you werenât sober before he said that, you certainly are now.Â
âenough. why?â
âjust wondering. i saw you before we left, thatâs all.â you look at the road ahead, listening to the quiet tune of the bryson tiller song youâd put on.
âyou saw me?â
âwith the pretty girl throwing herself at you? hard not to see.â you regret the words as soon as they leave your mouthâyou sound bitter and angry, two things you truly are, but you donât want rafe to know already.
âwhat, you jealous, kid?â
âwhy would i be jealous? youâre not my boyfriend.â it comes out louder than you expected, trying to talk over top and kelceâs voices in the backseat.
âno, mânot.âÂ
you bite your cheek and stare out the window.Â
ânot to interrupt, or anything, but i think topâs gonna puke-â you jolt when rafe slams on the brakes.
tannyhill is fifteen minutes from where the party was, but it takes fifty minutes to get back. rafe pulled over twice to let topper puke on the side of the road, so itâs three am before the four of you get back.
you want to go homeâthe alcohol in your system and unfinished conversation with rafe have left you feeling queasy too, but itâs three in the morning. top and kelce are too drunk to drive you, and you donât want to ask rafe.
you decide that you donât want to be alone with rafe either, changing into one of the shirts youâd brought from home and stupidly looking down realizing itâs one of rafeâs. did you own a single t-shirt that wasnât from his closet? where had all of your clothes gone?
grumpy that youâre in his clothes, upset that he had pretty much admitted he wasnât your boyfriend, and riddled with the assumption that he meant he would never be your boyfriend, you collect a pillow and one of the blankets from his bed, walking out the door when you hear rafeâs voice saying your name.
âwhere the hell are you goinâ?â facing him, you stare at your feet.
âthe couch.â
âwhen have you ever slept on the couch here?â
âiâm starting something new.â
âget in bed before i drag you there.â you groan, thumping both feet on the ground before stalking into the room. rafe exhales loudly, loud enough that you hear it, before muttering something under his breath and following you inside, closing the door.
you sit on the bed, but before you can think about what youâve done, you bunch up a pillow in your hand.
âyou-â you throw the pillow at rafe, which misses him completely. âsuck!â the second thuds against his chest, before falling on the ground. you huff from your position on the bed.
rafe picks up both pillows, dropping them on the bed.
âwhat the hell was that?â
âthis whole thing was a mistake.â
âitâs been two days.â
âwell iâm an emotional fuck!â
âyeah, i can tell.â you pick up the pillow again, whacking rafeâs side with it.
âugh! you canât just-â your hands falter, dropping next to you while you look up at rafe through wet eyes. â-just say that us sleeping together is a good idea because you donât want me with any other guys. what the fuck am i supposed to do with that?âÂ
âi donât know! youâre the fuckinâ clueless one. whatâd you think that means?â
âstop! just tell me! stop making me think, iâm so drunk and everything is mental gymastics with you-â
âwell stop throwinâ my own pillows at me!â
âyou suck, rafe. all of this and you canât just tell me whether you like me or not?âÂ
in hindsight, you donât know where the question came from. maybe a small part of you that wasnât willfully ignorant suspected a long time ago that the way rafe acts towards you is more than just overprotective friendship. you had buried the thought the second it emergedârafe cameron doesnât have girlfriends, doesnât do relationships. the rafe thatâs been your best friend was your best friend for that very reason, because you werenât in love with him.
or at least you thought you werenât in love with him. and at least, he thought you werenât in love with him.
the truth, youâre beginning to realize, watching rafe grab the pillow youâre about to hit him with out of your hands and set it down, is that rafe only acts the way he does with you, and no one else. the drinks you like in the back of his car, his shirts in your closet, the bed you share and all the time you two spend alone. you thought it was a great friendship, and maybe it was. but all along thereâs been something bubbling underneath the surface, the feeling in the pit of your stomach when he started talking to that girl, how angry you get when you see him with any girl thatâs not you.Â
you thought rafeâs a dick for giving you such a hard time about any boy you try to talk to. he is a dick, but youâre the bitch that canât stand seeing him with another girl.
and as the thoughts rush through your head, rafe looks at you in his bed, in his shirt, and realizes the answer to your question is that thereâs no one in the world he likes more than you.
âyou should have told me âbout the emotional fuck part.â
âyou should have just confessed.â
ânah, not really my thing.â he sits down on the bed next to you, and you stare up at blue eyes that are looking at you, a smile on his lips. âthis whole thing was a bad idea.â
âitâs been two days,â you mock.
âyeah, well, we tried it.â
âdo you regret it?â you hold your breath for the moment of truth.
âcâmon kid. yeah, i do. âcause iâm not letting you out of my sight after this. youâre dating me or no one at all.â
âso if we break up-â
âstraight to the convent for you. donât worry, iâll send you a care package. strawberry seltzer and those porno books-â
âshut up.â
âyou shut up. and get the fuck into bed. itâs late.â
âyou donât want one last emotional fuck? on your last day as a single man?â you tease, crawling under the sheets. âlearn how to read a clock. itâs past midnight.â
âoh. whatever, you know what i mean.â
âi guess i can be convinced-â he leans in for a kiss, and you hold your breath waiting for it, when thereâs a sharp knock on the door.
âguys. sorry to interrupt whatever the hell this is, but i think top needs to get his stomach pumped.â
#đhere it is#i am so nervous about this if you think itâs ass . i apologize in advance#kook trio reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader
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two very pretty hockey players đ
#ateez#atzsource#ateezlovenet#ultkpop#kpopccc#malegroupsnet#seonghwanet#yeonet#seonghwa#park seonghwa#yeosang#kang yeosang#hwahwa đ#+ yeosangie!!#mine.hwa#1kâš#usertheos#useranusia#lucieblr#userkngld#fordaniseyes#forbelleseyes#majatual#rhitag#tuserchrissy#i apologize in advance if this post lags your device
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[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Donât Let it Reach the Heart]
Listening to dbhc Ethoâs playlist got me thinking about Joywaveâs Destruction again, and even though I talked a little bit about this scene last year, I never really properly got to tell what exactly happened here⊠So, this is how it starts: Doc and X try to get Etho back online at the start of season 9 after his tragic shutdown at the end of season 8. Haunted and glitched out over the Last Life memories that made him shut down, Etho wakes up not⊠quite feeling like himself. Complications ensue.
Most of the words written here are lyrics from the songâ HIGHLY recommend yâall give it a listen to see the full vision here >:]
#dbhc#ethoslab#xisumavoid#docm77#bdoubleo100#tangotek#grian#dbhc doc#dbhc etho#dbhc xisuma#dbhc bdubs#dbhc grian#dbhc tango#hermitcraft dbh au#xisuma#doc#etho#bdubs#tango#tw eyestrain#tw glitch#tw blood#art escapades#last life smp#llsmp#HI IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS IM SO EXCITED and also apologies in advance for the upcoming horrors#BITING TEARING i hope you enjoy#dbhc art#dbhc music#destruction
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very goofy idea that came to me in a convo
Bonus: maybe grooming sheep wool isn't a good idea for a cat
#cult of the lamb#lamb cotl#narinder cotl#narilamb#suggestive cw#honestly just tagging as suggestive to be extra cautious lol#I apologize in advance for this lmao#lambert cotl
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putting this here
#apparently the two worst people of all time are what my brain wants to hyperfixate on specifically so i (dont) apologize in advance#xandraws#hazbin hotel#vox#valentino#vox hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel valentino#valentino hazbin hotel#hazbin vox#hazbin valentino#vox x valentino#voxval#valvox#staticmoth#xanqueue#< new tag?
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well, I can't say I expected the new chapter to feature Idia (metaphorically) going to (metaphorical) hell, getting a pep talk from his (metaphorical) Phantom brother which helps him finally move on once and for all from his brother's death, and (metaphorically) overblotting again to fight his way back out of (metaphorical) hell, only to have his darkest fear (non-metaphorically) come true when his mom goes through his computer and finds all his secret files. but I am glad it did!
also this is all a flashback for the purpose of explaining to our group what the heck is going on (whether or not any of it is getting through is another matter)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 chapter 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 chapter 7 spoilers#it's okay she said she didn't look in the password-protected folders#your secret recipes are safe#what's up guys it's IDIA TIME#red idia. redia. is this anything#(my thoughts are all over the place so this is not going to be comprehensible sorry in advance)#woooooo and his character arc is resolved!!!!#including my new favorite shroudbros interaction#idia: ortho i need to apologize for how much i must have hurt you --#ortho: whatever niisan i went to SPACE#they're so stupid. i love them so much.#not to mention idia starting to realize something is up when he pulls 3 ssrs no problem#(stares at 3 currently-running ssr pickups) twst is mocking me personally#aw man though! i forget if he had that line before about crimson muscle coming to his entrance ceremony or if that's new#either way i think that's sweet!#there's been a bit of a running subplot that idia actually really does want to be friends irl#but is too shy/anxious and convinced crimson would hate him immediately if they ever met#so idk. it was kind of a throwaway line but it still got me! when are he and lilia gonna meet for reals :(#(this will definitely involve makeovers) (this is not how idia expected their friendship to go but he has no choice now)
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Gale Math
So, we all know that in the epilogue, Gale tells Tav:
I love you.
And if you look at the datamined dialog files and read the dev notes, youâll see this:
Devnote: With the warmth of having said this a thousand times before.
So, taking that statement as a FACT (which, you know, Iâm certain it was intended to beâŠ) we now have a solid numerical value to start with: 1000.
Next, we know that per the narrator at the epilogue start, itâs been 6 months since the defeat of the netherbrain; therefore itâs been 6 months since Gale and Tav got engaged/agreed to live together. Weâre going to conclude that they have spent every day together since then.
6 months = 182.5 days
Now, assuming that Gale says âI love youâ to Tav on a relatively similar schedule each day (ex: when they first wake up, when Gale heads out to Blackstaff Academy, etc. etc.) we can make an equation:
1000 declarations of love divided by 182.5 days = the amount of times Gale tells Tav he loves them every single day.
We solve the equation and get 5.47945205
We round that down, and voila! We now have flawless mathematical proof that
Gale says âI love youâ to Tav an average of 5 times every single day
#Going to apologize in advance as Iâm already assuming I did something wrong here đ#âŠbut honestly?? 5 times a day sounds correct to me!#if I did mess this up I will gladly take basic math lessons from Professor Dekarios#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#gale#gale x tav#galemancer#Bg3#baldurâs gate 3
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