#aph fanfiction line

[neufhistoires]

Loveless Marriage (FrUK) Introduction

Loveless Marriage

Synopsis: Francis Bonnefoy and Arthur Kirkland are in an arranged marriage.

This is the first chapter/introduction!

Word Count: 4,069

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It all started when Francis’s family’s business plummeted. They had owned a successful vineyard and winery long before he was even born, so he had always lived a life of luxury, able to buy anything he fancied, to travel wherever he wanted to. 

He did have to do work though. It wasn’t as though they just handed him everything. In fact, he usually worked as a sort of wine salesman, taking samples of wine from his family’s winery with him when he traveled.

One day, which had started to feel like forever ago, when he was around eighteen, Francis brought his wine to England and it caught the eye of a certain family, the Kirklands. They, too, owned a successful family business, but rather than selling wine, they sold watches. They weren’t too well known across Europe at the time, but they were flourishing in the United Kingdom.

The father of the Kirklands, or the head of the watch company, had decided to stop by and try some of the wine the Frenchman was serving samples of in a British shopping mall. He was quick to say he liked it and offered to buy some, but unfortunately he’d brought his mouthy son who was a few years younger than Francis along and he had nothing but complaints about it.

The one who complained about the wine was named Arthur Kirkland, and based on Francis’s first impression of him, that was all he was good for - complaining.

Naturally, Francis was offended by the way Arthur spoke about his family’s wine, so he made snide remarks about the way the Englishman was dressed, the bickering continued from there, and they quickly became enemies.

It wouldn’t have meant much, really, making enemies with someone who lived in a different country, that is. However, as both of their families’ companies grew, their parents signed a business contract together, and they ended up seeing each other more and more.

The Kirklands wanted to sell the Bonnefoys’ wine in England, and for some reason that Francis couldn’t comprehend, the Bonnefoys wanted to sell the Kirklands’ watches in France. It seemed that somehow, despite the way Arthur and Francis couldn’t look at each other without fighting, their parents got along well.

At business meetings, their parents would talk for hours. When it was time for the holidays and they threw large parties, they would make sure to invite the other family as well. It was beneficial for the companies, so Arthur and Francis didn’t make too much of a fuss about it, but they would always end up fighting at every occasion they were forced to see each other.

One might think that they simply would have avoided each other at these events, but no, they seemed to seek one another out just to pick a fight. They were both filled with hatred for one another, practically obsessed with each other.

Everything changed about eight years later when a heavy drought hit France. The Bonnefoys knew the lack of rain would be bad for their vineyard, but it could only last so long, right? And they were rich. They had been running the vineyard and winery for years, so what were the odds that one little drought would be enough to ruin their business?

Francis had unwavering faith that everything would work out. He was lucky, after all. Things always worked out for him. That was why when Arthur had teased him about the whole thing, all he could do was laugh. As if something so unfortunate would happen to him!

It wasn’t until he heard his parents talking one night that he realized how serious the situation was. They were running out of wine to sell and they didn’t have enough grapes to make more wine. They had already started pulling money from their savings to try and get enough water for the grapes, but it wasn’t enough. They were all rotten.

Upon hearing the state his family’s company was in, Francis began to panic. As silly as it sounded, he had always been well off, so he would truly have no idea how to live if his family’s business plummeted. He wouldn’t have any products to sell, so he supposed he could work as a host or something like that, but… he wouldn’t have enough money to provide for his family that way. It wouldn’t be enough.

Just as he thought things couldn’t get any worse, he heard his father on the phone. He was talking to the Kirklands.

Francis had wanted to solve the whole issue before Arthur had a chance to find out, especially after he had teased him. The thought of him being lower than that Englishman… He would surely rather be dead.

He listened carefully to the conversation on the phone, impatiently waiting to hear what his father said so he could guess what Arthur’s father was saying on the other side.

“Well that settles it then!” Francis’s father said with a laugh, as if everything was fine and their entire business wasn’t plummeting.

Francis scowled, stepping out from around the corner to let his presence be known. His father glanced over at him, and there was something suspicious about the way his demeanor changed.

“Oui, well we’ll discuss it more when we get there,” His father added before saying his goodbyes and hanging up.

And that was how the Bonnefoys ended up going to England for the summer. Yes, the entire summer.

It turned out that Arthur’s father had given Francis’s father quite the offer. They had become close friends over the past few years, and their relationship was something that easily surpassed being just business partners, so it wasn’t that big of a surprise when Mr. Kirkland told Mr. Bonnefoy that they could put the wine business aside for right now and just focus on selling watches.

Hideous watches, if you asked Francis. He didn’t understand how people found them fashionable at all, and here his parents were selling them. He was so embarrassed.

As soon as they pulled up to the Kirklands’ mansion, Francis was disappointed. Now he had turned into the one who was all complaints.

It seemed as though they were stuck in the nineteenth century, not a single modern decoration in sight. He hoped that he would be able to at least decorate the room he was given if they would be staying there for the entire summer… 

“Oi, what are you doing gawking like that at my family’s heirlooms?” A certain British man asked, interrupting Francis’s train of thought.

Francis turned to face him, a somewhat disappointed look on his face.

“Is that how you greet your guests? I thought you were supposed to be a gentleman,” Francis replied with a scoff before taking a step towards the shorter man.

The Englishman scoffed, too, but then a devious smirk spread across his face.

“I imagine you’ve sold all your family heirlooms by now, right? But don’t worry, you’ll be able to buy them back soon with the money my family’s company practically hands over to you,” Arthur said, a smirk on his face as he stepped closer to the Frenchman, not willing to back down.

Francis’s face flushed in embarrassment. Yes, Arthur definitely had an advantage over him right now…

“My family doesn’t need any help from your stupid family,” Francis replied, raising his voice as he took another step closer to Arthur, almost completely eliminating the space between them.

“Oh, really?” Arthur asked, the smirk on his face growing as he knew he was pushing all of the right buttons. “Is that why your parents called mine, begging for some kind of assistance or they-”

“They did not beg!” Francis yelled, cutting Arthur off.

“Of course they did. You heard them and that’s why you’re so embarrassed right now..!”Arthur replied, laughing quite literally in Francis’s now completely red with embarrassment face.

“You’re the one who should be embarrassed, trying to make fun of anyone with those bushy eyebrows of yours..! It looks like you have caterpillars on your face!” Francis yelled, forcing laughter as he pointed his finger at the man who was so close to him that he just ended up poking his chest.

For some reason, despite being ahead financially and everything, that was enough to set Arthur off.

“Oh what would you know about what looks good?! You frog!” Arthur yelled, poking his finger into Francis’s chest as well.

Things could’ve easily gone on like that all day, but… Their parents had entered the room, and they were the ones who really looked embarrassed.

“Really, Francis? We’re guests here, so apologize now,” Francis’s mother scolded him, which made Arthur’s cocky smirk return.

“Yeah, you heard her. Apologize to me,” Arthur insisted, but then his mother cleared her throat and he looked over at her.

“You apologize, too, Arthur, and please take Francis to his room,” Arthur’s mother insisted.

The two of them looked at each other in horror. They had to apologize to each other? They really were being treated like little kids, but…

“Je suis désolé,” Francis mumbled reluctantly, an obvious scowl still on his face as he said it.

“I’m sorry,” Arthur responded flatly. “Please do follow me to your new room,” He added sarcastically as he started to walk up the steps.

Francis laughed under his breath at how pained Arthur seemed to speak politely to him. Then he picked up his suitcases and followed the British man upstairs, bracing himself for the room he was about to stay in for the entire summer.

Once they got up the steps, it seemed as though Arthur was walking down hallways and taking different turns forever. It would’ve been fine, but since Francis was carrying luggage packed for an entire summer, he already felt winded after climbing up a flight of stairs.

“You purposefully gave me the room farthest away from the steps, didn’t you?” Francis asked with a huff, looking a little disheveled as he dragged his luggage around.

Arthur turned around to look at him, a smirk taking over his face, which let the Frenchman know he was going to say something sarcastic again.

“I know it must be intimidating, but this is what wealthy people live like,” the Englishman replied with a small smile before turning back around.

Maybe it was something about the way he smiled, but… for just a second… Francis thought Arthur didn’t look so malicious. It made him let down his guard some, until… 

“Here’s your room…” Arthur eventually said, opening a door.

Francis hesitated some, preparing himself for the worst, but… he was visibly shocked when it wasn’t so bad. No, it was… nice, even. 

It didn’t look anything like the rest of the house. It didn’t have that old, Victorian, English feeling the lobby had. It looked like a normal, modern, French room.

Francis was stunned, taking a look at everything as he dragged his luggage into the room and set it aside.

The color and design of the walls, the floors, the curtains, the bed sheets, the pillow cases… all of it was beautiful. Francis was impressed, to say the least.

The Frenchman glanced over at Arthur with a different kind of look in his eyes. Up until then, they both hadn’t said anything, but when Arthur made eye contact with Francis, he took it as a sign and walked over to the window.

“It’s not just the inside of the room,” Arthur murmured quietly, giving a tug on the curtains to pull them open.

As the curtains parted, they revealed beautiful scenery. 

The Kirklands lived in a rural area that was still within driving distance of London. It had all the charm of a rural area with the convenience of being close to the city… 

And to Francis, it felt as though all the charm and appeal of rural England could be seen through his ornate bedroom window.

Without a word, Francis walked over to the window, glancing over at Arthur for a split second before he leaned on the windowsill to take in the tree-covered sloping green mountains accompanied by blue skies and small residences scattered in the distance.

“C’est trop belle pour les mots,” Francis murmured, his eyes glued to the scenery in front of him as he spoke.

The Frenchman looked moved. And if he had looked closely at the Englishman, he would’ve seen the soft smile that had taken over his face as he watched the other man take in the view.

“This room has the best view in the whole house,” Arthur said proudly, but then when Francis didn’t reply right away, his cheeks dusted pink.

The Englishman’s face could only flush more when Francis averted his gaze towards him, making eye contact with him again. There was something about the soft look on the Frenchman’s face that made his heart race.

“You would give the room with the best view to moi?” Francis asked innocently before a smirk took over his face. “You must secretly like me a lot,” He teased before standing back up straight.

That comment alone was enough to turn Arthur’s face tomato red and lose all his composure.

“I don’t like you at all, you git! I just thought it must be a pain that your parents’ business is suffering and you have to go stay in another country with people you hate for an entire summer! That’s all!” Arthur yelled, flustering himself further as he realized what he said made it sound like he did indeed like the other man at least a little bit.

Francis had prepared to yell back at the Englishman, but as his words sunk in, the smirk on his face only grew.

“Those sound like the words of someone who likes me more than a little bit,” Francis continued to tease him.

“Stupid frog,” Arthur muttered before pulling the curtain closed.

Maybe things wouldn’t be so bad, Francis thought. If Arthur was willing to consider things such as his comfort and personal style, the Frenchman supposed he could put up with him for just one summer. At least he wouldn’t have to look at tacky English tapestry every night before he fell asleep…

Arthur left Francis to unpack, and the two didn’t see each other again until dinner. The same as usual, they bickered with one another at the table and their parents happily chattered. The conversations between their parents were mostly light-hearted, except for when they discussed business, which was when they inevitably became serious.

There was no talk of the Bonnefoys’ winery at all anymore. It seemed they had completely shifted their focus to the Kirklands’ watch company and how to open up more shops in France. Essentially, the Kirklands would be putting the Bonnefoys in business by employing them in watch stores in Paris.

The next few days continued on like that, with Francis and Arthur bumping into each other in the halls and gardens and picking fights, their parents discussing business ideas, and the begrudging times when they all did some sort of activity together, like croquet.

Arthur was definitely sick of seeing Francis, but the Frenchman had started to think of it as some sort of game. The game was most likely called “Let’s See How Much We Can Annoy Arthur,” and for a while he thought he was succeeding at it, but on the contrary, the Englishman seemed to be getting used to him.

Francis would sit down across from Arthur when he was crocheting and start a conversation with him, and the Englishman wouldn’t even be bothered by it until he realized who he was talking to and stopped out of spite. The two of them could laugh about it though. Yeah, it actually wasn’t so bad…

It wasn’t so bad until Arthur’s mom walked in one day when the two of them were talking and commented that she was glad they seemed to be getting along so well. That was when they both were kind of freaked out. Surely they weren’t really getting along, right? They were just acting.

Francis was a great actor, as he had to be, being a salesman. Whether it was false compliments or stretching the truth, he could charm anyone into buying something from him. And his summer in England was just the same, he thought, he was simply there to charm the Kirklands and save his family’s business. That was what he told himself, at least.

About a month into the Bonnefoys’ stay in England, both Francis’s and Arthur’s parents started to act weird. They both weren’t aware of the other’s parents behavior, but they could tell that their own parents were acting strange. For example, when Francis asked his mother if she wanted to go shopping in London with him, she agreed, but their conversations felt filtered, like she was hiding something from him.

The same with Arthur, when he spoke to his father about the next upcoming event for their company, his father was short with him and didn’t seem to want to go into details with him.

It went on like that with their parents acting bizarre for a few days, until dinner one night when the truth finally came out. 

Arthur hadn’t wanted to make a scene in front of Francis and his family, as it was really none of their business and he had no idea that the Frenchman’s parents were acting strange, too, but when his mother refused to answer his questions when they were alone in the kitchen, he decided that he had no choice but to bring it up at dinner.

“Mum, Dad,” Arthur started, his voice hesitant as he inevitably caught the attention of everyone at the table rather than just his parents. “You've been acting awfully strange recently and I want to know what’s going on,” He eventually said, ripping it off like a bandaid.

Arthur’s mother seemed surprised that her son confronted her so bluntly at the dinner table when everyone was listening. She turned hesitantly to look at her husband, who also seemed a bit surprised.

Before they had a chance to reply, Francis interjected.

“You know, I hate to be in a situation where I agree with him, but you two have been acting strange, too,” Francis said to his parents.

Francis’s mother sighed and looked over at Arthur’s mother. Arthur glanced back and forth at them with a confused look on his face before he started to look annoyed.

“So you’re all hiding something then? Well what is it? Is the business okay? Why won’t you tell me?” Arthur asked.

“You asked too many questions. Now they’ll take even longer to tell us!” Francis complained, crossing his arms.

Before Arthur had a chance to reply, his mother interjected.

“I suppose now is a good time to tell you,” Arthur’s mother said, but then she glanced over at Francis’s mother as if she was waiting for her approval for something. Francis’s mother gave a small nod and a smile, which seemed to relieve some tension because then Arthur’s mother smiled as well.

“You’re getting married!” Arthur’s mom said enthusiastically, making Francis’s parents clap as well.

Arthur looked terribly annoyed, letting out a “hah?!” as soon as she said it. The Frenchman started to snicker and covered his mouth.

“Wow, congratulations,” Francis said as he let out more laughter, causing Arthur to look even more upset.

“What do you mean I’m getting married?! To whom?!” Arthur yelled, standing up from his seat.

“Now, now, calm down son,” Arthur’s dad said, standing up, too, to signal that he should sit back down.

“I’m not calming down until I know what’s going on here! Why the bloody hell would I marry someone that I don’t know?!”

“Oh, you know this person,” Arthur’s mom replied, a smile somehow still on her face.

Arthur looked dumbfounded. He genuinely had no idea who it could be.

“Is it… the woman who works at the flower shop..?” Arthur asked awkwardly and his parents shook their heads. “Alright… The library?” He asked, making them shake their heads again.

It went on like that as Arthur tried to guess who it might be, but he eventually just got annoyed. Why were they making him guess so much? He clearly didn’t even know who the woman was.

Francis was just sitting there, watching everything unfold like a soap opera. He thought the house had been rather quiet recently and had wished for something interesting to happen, but he was not expecting this.

“It’s Francis,” Francis’s mother eventually interjected, her cheeks flushing.

Suddenly, Francis went from enjoying the show to choking on his wine. Arthur, on the other hand, couldn’t even get any words to come out at first. Then he suddenly started to laugh.

“You’re joking, right? I didn’t realize today was April Fools! I forgot to check the calendar!” Arthur replied, expecting someone to laugh along and reassure him that, yes, it was a joke. 

However, no one laughed, and Francis started to look more and more mortified. The Frenchman looked over at his mother, expecting her to start laughing, but instead she gently placed her hand on his shoulder.

“I was going to tell you soon… I was just trying to think of the right words,” Francis’s mother said eventually, causing his face to pale.

“Quoi? Est-ce vous vraiment pensez que je vais me marier avec lui?” Francis asked his parents with a look of disbelief.

“C’est pour notre famille. Si tu te maries avec lui, nous pouvons nous assurer que nous avons des emplois,” Francis’s dad responded casually before taking a sip of wine.

If Francis married Arthur then it would ensure their family had jobs? That was all their son was to them?

“Nous détestons l’un l’autre,” Francis responded with a sigh before he picked up his own glass of wine and drank the whole thing in one go, glaring daggers across the table at Arthur after he finished it.

Arthur hadn’t even been looking at him, but he felt his gaze and looked over.

“Why are you looking at me like that? It’s not like I want to marry you either!” Arthur spat before turning back to his parents. “Besides, what do we even get from a deal like this?” The Englishman asked.

“Well, you are already twenty-three…” Arthur’s mother trailed off before clearing her throat, signaling for her husband to finish what she was trying to say.

“You’re twenty-three and you still haven’t even tried to date anyone yet. At this point, we’ve decided that since you’re still living with us and you’re part of our company, we’ll make this decision for you,” Arthur’s father said in a matter of fact tone.

Francis went from looking annoyed to bursting out laughing again when Arthur’s parents teased him for never dating anyone. Arthur’s cheeks burned red.

“Besides, we like the Bonnefoys, so why not marry their son?” Arthur’s mother interjected, smiling at Francis’s mother again.

“Oh, I don’t know, because I hate him?!”

“I hate you, too, but I guess I could accept you as my obedient little wife,” Francis teased, a smirk on his face as he draped his arm over Arthur’s shoulder.

Arthur had no idea when Francis had stood up and walked over to his side of the table, but the hair on the back of his neck stood up as soon as the other man got close to him.

“Get off of me,” Arthur yelled, shoving the Frenchman’s arm away. “And there’s no way I would be the wife! You’re the one who’s staying over at my house, so you’re the wife!” The Englishman yelled with a laugh, pointing his finger at Francis.

“Oh, really? Well–”

“Calm down, s’il te plâit,” Francis’s mom interjected, standing up when she realized they might start actually fighting each other.

“Yes, let’s just go to bed early tonight and we can talk more about this tomorrow,” Arthur’s mom replied as she stood up from the table as well.

“Bonne nuit,” Francis said softly, locking eyes with Arthur for just a second before he turned on his heel and left the dining room.

And the next day, despite all of their objections, their parents didn’t budge. It seemed that regardless of what they wanted, for the sake of their parent’s companies and images, they would be marrying one another.

[aphverse-confessions]

Hello hi, self-proclaimed favourite anon here to respond to anon who said that Jess being an irl shipper/mlm fetishizer isn't exactly the most pressing issue compared to everything else (link for everyones convenience -> https://tinyurl.com/response-to-original-anon). Personally speaking (and no shade to anon at all) Jess's fetishization of mlm being dismissed as a 'non-issue' is… a little frustrating since the fetishization of mlm is a very real issue a part of a larger issue of Jess's treatment of queer people and queer relationships. Warning: This will get lengthy because I do want to articulate why I included Jess's fetishization of mlm and her Septiplier involvement and to provide a broader perspective of all of the issues with the former has caused. I want to be as thorough as possible with writing a response to the original anon.

My point was Jess used MLM and queer ships to fuel her own amusement/fantasies but doesn't show ANY queer relationships and queer folk at all. To Jess, queer men were objects to get off to and find amusement in, Jess could toy around with and discard when she gets bored. Jess's fetishization and queerbaiting very much go hand-in-hand together because she didn't treat queer relationships as a tangible relationship for the characters but she still used the chance that these relationships could have any screentime to string her fanbase along. Look at Garrance in MyStreet and MCD. Back in MyStreet, Laurence wanted to kiss Aphmau in a Romeo-Juliet play so he used a potion that would switch Garroth out (since Garroth was Romeo and Aph was Juliet). Hijinks ensue, Laurence swaps out Aphmau, he and Garroth kiss and there's a HUGE spectacle made about it. Both of these men DID NOT want the kiss, they were reacting quite badly to it actually. It VERY MUCH was fuel to the fanbases love for Garrance in MCD as people read the queer undertones between the two characters.

To my memory, I don't think Jess didn't confirm that Laurence nor Garroth were ever queer or expressed interest in men. Their sexualities were very much written to be straight as Garroth and Laurence only pursue women: yet in MyStreet and MCD they were pushed into a compromising situation where they had a kiss with another queer man + Garroth and Laurence both did the devils tango with one another according to 'The-List™'. Garrance is deeply important to this fanbase because a majority of people are queer, and Garrance was very much their exposure to queer relationships and queerness in general. To have two fleshed out characters have the possibility of being in an actual relationship was deeply important to people.

Jess hyping up the idea that Garroth and Laurence could have an actual queer relationship despite never explicitly making/stating either characters queer, a relationship Jess herself supported amongst fan to just…. NEVER follow through with it nor even bother showing that either character is queer despite putting them in situations where they can be read as quer, isn't just queerbaiting you're fucking queerfishing with hook line and sinker. Something Jason Bravura himself agreed with (link -> https://tinyurl.com/jason-admits-the-queerbaiting), Jess was writing MLM to string fans along and for her own amusement. Jess never bothered to confirm Garroth or Laurence queer, Jess never bothered to confirm or show that Garroth or Laurence had an attraction to men, Jess never bothered to even put Garrance as an actual possibility aside from subtext and blatant queerbaiting. She only portrays Garrance to be put in wACkY situations to be made a spectacle out of and to string along fans.

Also anon, I'm going to be blunt here: you're absolutely downplaying the extent of Jess's involvement with Septiplier to 'Jessica thinking it’d be cool if two YouTubers kissed in 2016'. Alongside the link to her tweet about Septiplier, I included a link of a person reacting to a whole ass VIDEO of Jess CREATING a whole ass Septiplier fanfiction for her own amusement. The entire premise of the whole video was Jess making an entire fanfiction and having her characters roleplay to said fanfiction. Like, Jess sat down, decided that she will write a romantic fanfiction between two real breathing men, will make an entire video dedicated to roleplaying this fanfiction, even telling audience that "if you enjoyed this fanfiction, leave a like + comment + subscribe and don't tell mark or jack about this please". And mind you, this is all from watching 1 minute and 30 seconds of the video. I implore anon and everyone else to watch this clip of the video (since the other video is an hour long react) for yourselves if you wanna confirm -> (https://tinyurl.com/jess-septi-video)

Jess profited off of violating the boundries of two men and their discomfort, acknowledge how uncomfortable this entire fucking video will be (don't tell mark and jack, amiright) and profited off of said discomfort. Holy shit, Jess had a whole ass room DISPLAYING Septiplier fanart and she was super giddy about roleplaying this fanfiction for her own amusement. And mind you, she was fully aware of the consequences that real life "shipping" causes between two people as seen with the linked -> (https://tinyurl.com/max-ross-ship-tweet)…. Like, anon do you not see the issue with her fetishizing this relationship??? It's one thing to privately write fiction and ship two real people, and it's another to make it a whole ass fanfiction to make a fucking video milking the hype between the relationship of two real people.

Like… that IS really questionable behaviour for Jess. It's really questionable that Jess, who was 23 years old, was actively treating the relationship between two REAL men as amusement and content to profit off of. It's really questionable that Jess presented the idea of a queer relationship between two men, hyped up that relationship to her very much closeted/queer fanbase and NEVER bothered to canonize either men as queer or their relationship.

Everything I have mentioned above is JUST one side of the coin. In a vaccum, its not an issue if Jess enjoys MLM pairings and/or 'it’d be cool if two youTubers kissed'. The other side of the coin is that there has been REAL tangible HARM that Jess contributed to. There's a reason why Jess took down that horrendous video because it ABSOLUTELY contributed to the disgusting sexual harassment Mark and Jack received; she was a stupidly popular youtuber making roleplays and feeding into the Septiplier hype of the 2010s. The reason I say she fetishizes MLM because Jess didn't treat queer men or mlm romance as actual who are worthy of respect, she used it for silly scenarios to hype up the shippers and to string along her fans. Jess absolutely contributed to the social-othering queer men faced online, seeing them as 'exotic' spectacles to be gawked at and admired yet simultaniously be disrespected and seen as toys to be discarded off once the awe wears off. Queer people and their queer romance is sexy and hot for straight people to get off to, but god forbid we actually make it serious and have queer people have queer romances that aren't just kiss teases or ship bait. Jess wasn't some teenager who had an underdeveloped perspective of queer people and queer relationships, she was a grown ass woman making these videos and making these decisions and DISREGARDED all of the potential harm that it would cause to people.

When you step back and consider the implications of Jess's actions, yea its. Not really a non issue now it is? It's absolutely awful behaviour and awful actions that were done, and as a queer person themselves, it's fucking uncomfortable as shit to look back upon. Watching that Septiplier clip just, felt like I was being lobotmized by a yaoi paddle while sitting in a sharpie bath. It was uncomfortable to see how queer romance was to be gawked and oogled at and feeling so othered by it. It's really uncomfortable and I would not invite Jess and Jason to the Aphblr Pride Parade, they get to watch from a safe distance in the safety of an Arby's parking lot. Regardless, this was a super lengthy response so as compensation here is your shrimp for reading it to the end 🦐

.

[rosesandalfazemas]

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5

I’m a little bit tired and thinking very hard about port x nyo England at the moment and so, even though I’ve yet to see Van Helsing (2004), I do think that scene where Dracula dips a woman in front of a mirror and she’s the only one who shows up in this room full of people has major engport vibes 👀

You should watch it, it's a good movie :D. If I tell you I'm roleplaying Vampire!Port with @greengreekeyes25 and one of his brides is Arthur, maybe you would think it's a coincidence. But there're not coincidences in the world, just fate.

Happy Samhain ;)

Ps. The other brides are Francis - who has Scotland as his lover/child, and Ana (Belgium), who has Antonio as her slave; and Abel is Van Helsing.

56 notas. Fecha de publicación: 31 de octubre de 2022

4

Rarepair Hetalia Week - DAY VI - Mermaids n' Pirates

Almost last work for @hwsrarepairweek2022! - This is the first time I do this kind of AU, so while I was drawing it, that line came up and then I had the idea of a context for this:

Iberia is a Mermaid Queen, ruler of the Mediterranean area. She has two children who are the inheriters of the kingdom. It is said there is a whole country-like under the seas made of pure gold and pearls. Of course this makes marines and pirates to navigate there, but there are legends of being devoured and the ships always dissapeared.

Our ambitious Arthur goes to adventure to find treasures with his crew, but their destiny is the same as everyone else. Fortunately for him, the princes weren't hunting for her mother or for them (yes, human meat is a delicatessen), and one of them rescued him and put him in land. The mermen have never been seeing by humans, and then Kirkland, after a couple of months, went to look for him once again. Since it seemed an accident - or the human is a total dork - Portugal rescues him again and then this scene happens.

Nop, t's not a fic, just the idea came out alone so, I shared it with you!

Thanks to @geocore who let me use their desing of sea-creature Portugal, as they imagine him from the myths. I applied it for a merman and it fits perfectly so, welcome to my new visual headcanon my friend )?

Hope you like it, and take care~

57 notas. Fecha de publicación: 25 de junio de 2022

3

Finally I could do the cover for my fic, La Perla y El Rubi~

Hope you like it!

63 notas. Fecha de publicación: 17 de julio de 2022

2

Everyone in the fandom jokes that Arthur has a flat ass but it would really funny if he didn’t and it would drive Port crazy

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66 notas. Fecha de publicación: 26 de noviembre de 2022

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[thedarkmistress16]

Favorite fic you've written? What would you recommend someone first reads of your work for the best first impression?

good q! ...Do I have to choose one? lol

I think my favorite is a very old, dark aph idea I had that I still think about sometimes, and I mean that in a way where I can clearly visualize what I was going for at the time today, as if the idea was always living in my brain without realizing it. I think I'm attached to how I set the tone in the way I wrote the description of events and just the concept of the character dynamic in general. I never finished it and it was never published, but I feel like if I sit myself down, I can complete it and improve upon the elements I was trying to go for, since I remember exactly how I want to write the progression of events after reading through what I have.

I would have to recommend one of my fanfictions since that's basically the majority of my writing still, even ones unposted XD. I would actually recc. my YouTuber one-shot series, specifically for fans of the channels mentioned, because despite the older and shoddy writing style, I still find it to be an enjoyable read for a 2015 fan (like a piece of history). Plus, I've been told I write their personalities accurately/in a believable way so there's that. 👍

And if that recc. was too old or not part of your YouTube watch experience, then I would suggest reading any one of my yan!rpf headcanons, as crazy as that sounds. It's one of the more recently-posted writing projects that entails a lot of my writing habits into digestible bullet points for a, what I've gathered, a niche idea for an AU:

injecting some comedy (plays on words relating to the actor's body of works) which implies some research on the subject for inspiration

exhaustive details on how the character would react to the darling's potential actions (choice inclusivity for the reader's theoretical, multiple routes)

how becoming a yandere would affect their personalities and actions (to murder or threaten? composure or rage?)

outlining a general plot from point A to B (start of obsession to relationship developments to "snapping" and eventual kidnapping to their ideal outcomes)

and how I write in the 3rd limited and omni/2nd POV.

And on top of that, for those who've read more than one hc, you can compare how different the characters as yans are from each other in levels of intensity, their moral lines (some don't kill and others are forceful), and how they are best subdued by their darling. And I think for a good first impression of what I tend to write, as dark shit is my jam and this formatting/length is more my style than a long, chaptered fic (I am trying to branch out into it, tho).

Actually! Since we're on the subject of ✨moi's writing,✨ may I kindly suggest this one aph fic I planned on extending from the silly idea I had sitting there years ago only to completely write an entirely different plotline from the ground up and add in a bunch of unnecessary details? 👀

[mysticalmusicwhispers]

Summary: Seychelles goes down to the beach.

Warnings: implied nudity at the very end

Notes: intended to be a small drabble about Seychelles and a moment at one of her islands' beaches, but it morphed into a sort of description study for the five senses ig. I'm honestly not sure what I'm trying to convey here, but I hope it makes you feel something regardless. Enjoy!

Michelle can feel the ocean long before she reaches the end of the small path winding through the coco-de-mers. She wonders if it is instinct that pulls her towards it, pulls her like a magnet to true north; or maybe it is because the sea is simply a part of her, the salty ocean water the blood that runs through her veins. It is fitting, she thinks: she often fancies that her heart beats in time with the waves lapping gently at her shores, sometimes thinks that she hears the soft susurrus of the surf in places far inland, occasionally catches whiffs of salty air and the crisp sea breeze when she sniffs at her hands. So, she thinks, as her bare feet step nimbly over the twisting roots and smooth pebbles and dry leaves that litter the winding path, perhaps that—the fact that she is a child of the sea much more than the land—that is why the ocean has always felt like her true home.

The sand is cool and silky under her feet, and with every step it shifts slightly, enveloping her toes, embracing them in welcome. She is suddenly reminded why she loves walking barefoot along the shore, and she grins, digging her toes into the sand and feeling the fine grains slip around them like water.

Water. She can smell the half-sweet, half-salty tang of the ocean— the breeze is stronger on the shore, filled with the smell of brine and seaweed and signs of small shellfish hiding under the sand. She breathes in deeply. Her fingers tingle, and she imagines it is from something in the seabreeze, something magic, perhaps, that stirs her marrow and quickens the beating of her soul.

She slips out of her dress easily and places it on the sand. It will be comfortably warm when she comes back, like a hug from the sunshine.

And then she walks, with careful, dainty steps, towards the water, and stands there, feeling the waves lap at her ankles and curl around her feet, an entreaty to come closer, to come home. The voice of the sea calls her name.

The voice of the sea calls her name, and she obeys. She walks further and further, deeper and deeper, until she strikes out with a sweep of the arm, and beings to swim.

The sea embraces her gently, and she relaxes into the welcoming waves. Seagulls shriek distantly above, and a school of fish dart past, quick streaks of yellow and orange on a vase canvas of blue. The cool ocean water invigorates her, excites her; she can hear her heartbeat thrumming loud in her ears and see the sparkling glint of sunlight on the water. When she comes up for air, the familiar tang of sea spray hits her, and she breathes deeply before dipping back down into the waves.

She is home.

Feedback is welcome and appreciated!

[a-selkie-abroad]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Hetalia: Axis Powers Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: America (Hetalia) Additional Tags: Alternate History, Alternate Universe, World War III, Cold War, Post Cold War but it ended badly, Post-Nuclear War, Nuclear Winter, Post-Apocalypse, Alfred F. Jones, the f stands for 'fucked up', cause that's presumably what he did, I haven't thought through what happened, Hopeful Ending, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Human & Country Names Used (Hetalia), inspired by jubilee line, vaguely, Implied/Referenced Character Death, New York City, Experimental Style, Liberal use of Italics, Disassociation, lots of ash, Minor Injuries, Alfred F. Jones-centric, America-Centric (Hetalia), Phoenix symbolism?, in MY fanfic?, perhaps, snowglobes, those tacky souvenir ones, You know the ones I mean, Repetition, Guilt Series: Part 6 of Selkie's Hetalia Fics Summary:

MAD (Mutually Assured Destruction) A doctrine of military strategy and national security policy in which a full-scale use of nuclear weapons by two or more opposing sides would cause the complete annihilation of both the attacker and the defender.

-o0o-

Post-cold-war-but-it-ended-badly, Alfred wanders what used to be his Heart alone, left to question what's left if everything he knows and what defines who he is is gone.

[peppermint-chocolate-cherries]

Chapters: 32/53 - Chapter 32 published August 18 2021

Fandom: Hetalia: Axis Powers Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Canada/Lithuania, Spain/Ukraine, Belarus/Germany, Liechtenstein/Russia, Czech Republic/Switzerland Characters: England, Female Canada, Belarus, Hungary, Germany, North Italy, South Italy, Lithuania, Switzerland, Spain, Japan, Poland, Ukraine, Czech Republic, Prussia, Liechtenstein, Russia, America, France Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fantasy, Adventure, Fairy Tale Retellings, Fairy Tale Elements, Satire, Magic, Royalty

Fanfiction.Net Version HERE

Summary:

Arthur falls asleep in his cozy bed, in his modern-day London flat. He wakes up in the royal hunting grounds in the kingdom of Ixaidel, in a magical realm far away.

To the west, the kingdom of Prathage is resolving a civil war, triggered by the “Ice Princess” who cast the land in an eternal winter five years ago.

To the east, the Princess of Stulikya is planning a coup, hoping to reclaim her family’s crown from her wicked sister-in-law.

As the realm’s unexpected Don Quixote caricature, Arthur finds that the misdeeds must be corrected, the spells must be broken, and the kingdoms must be set right before he can finally return to his own world.

[itsyaboibossypuppy14]

[ MMD HETALIA ] Cant I Even Dream [thx for 17,000 views also read the d...

thank you for 17,000 views!

also i decided  to write something to go with this video or i guess the meaning behind it.

here we go.

Romano was tired of doing the same thing he wanted a change after so long. so he decided to leave everything behind to live on as someone new,. but there was a catch to all of this 1. he would no longer exist and would be replaced 2. everyone s memories would be replace with new ones.

so he took the risk and now he is free .

thats it for my crappy memeing (lol)

[ask-hetalia-jones-family]

STATE FILES

hey heres al being pretty,

Summary:

The USA goes into isolation for many years, then one day a few kids are in the world meeting ready to greet the nations. Now, certain Nations are being allowed within the US's border and are in for more then just a shock. Not only is the US much more advanced but Alfred lets them in on his little secret.

State oc story! I will make the canon america ship (Pruame/ Prussia x America) skip able so there is no need to worry about a ship with Alfred

Links to elsewhere to read it

WattPad: https://www.wattpad.com/story/222120798-usa-reopened

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23822452/chapters/57240190

—————-—————-—————-

Chapter one: Isolation

—————-—————-—————-

 “What do you mean by isolation?” England asked America as he stood at the podium.

“My new president, Ms Angela Gracia, is going to be isolating the US for a minimum of 15 years. I will send letters and limited photos but other than that I will not be allowed to go out of my country, but I can still text, call and stuff!” Alfred smiled at the last part. 

“Alfred,” Brazil asked, “What about trades?” they asked, many were anxious about that topic. 

“We’ll continue to buy things we can’t grow in the US! But many other things we will slowly stop buying, But a few months after we stop buying we will give you money for no product for the sake of ensuring countries can find new trading partners.” Alfred explained.

“Debt aru?” China asked.

“Continued to be paid”

“Game imports?” Japan asked.

“Will continued to be imported”

“Exports?” Korea asked, 

“Only certain things will continue”

“Puerto Rico?” Cuba asked, tapping his figures on the table. 

“Depending if they want to join as a state,”

“If they don’t?” Cuba pressed annoyed.

“I will personally escort her right to you” Alfred said clearly. Cuba seemed satisfied.

“Any other questions?” Alfred asked. 

There were no further questions

———

A month passed and now the USA was in official isolation. 

———

The next world meeting was very strange. Cuba and Spain were talking fast paced spanish with a little girl on Cuba’s laptop.

“Ve~ Who’s a she?” Italy asked, leaning to see the screen. 

The little girl gasped and turned yelling something to someone off screen, there was a fast reply in a southern accent but it was also in a language they didn’t know. 

“Puerto Rico, she's with Alfred but I can still call her.” Cuba explained with a grumble. 

“Hello hello hello” She repeated with a few giggles, “I’m Alondra!” 

“Ohh! Caoi Alondra!” Northern Italy smiled cheerily.

Matthew surprisingly has his feet on the table, Bear in his lap and was staring intently at his phone in a very serious text conversation with his brother. 

England was going on a rant about Canada’s manners and France was trying to get him off of Matthew’s back. 

———

Little was done that meeting. 

———

“Hey Mattie!” Alfred greeted over the phone.

“Hey Al,” Mathew said a smile shining threw his voice.

“Long time no talk? It’s been what? 3 months? Ya been busy?” Alfred asked joyfully. 

“Yeah, it’s been a bit more difficult with your ships out of the water but everything’s fine” Matthew said with the sound of a keyboard in the background.

“Yeah, it’ll be hard for a while but I promise it will be ok in the long run. I won’t let you get hurt in all of this” Alfred explained chipperily. 

“I trust you Alfie, I just wish I could visit and see what’s happening over there” Matthew sighed.

“I wish I could tell you, and bring you over here,” Alfred sighed thinking to himself.

“Describe it.” “What?” “Describe the advancements, not how it’s happening just how it is.” Matthew explained. 

“Oh. Hmmm.” Alfred looked out the window at the rolling hills, trees and cleaner air.

“You can smell the trees in the middle of time square. The grass is a beautiful green. It really is beautiful Mattie,” Alfred sighed. 

Matthew smiled seeing the image in his mind, “I need to go Alfred, thank you,” Matthew said.

“Ok, I’ll talk to you later Mattie” They hung up with smiles. 

———

“Hey Molossia!” Sealand greeted.

“Do you realize what fucking time of day it is Peter?” Micheal grumbled, rubbing his eyes looking at the red numbers on his bedside clock.

“Uhhh, a time?”

“6 am” Micheal muttered glaring at the clock. 

“Oh! Well do you want to play or not? Dad let me on the computer all day because I’ve been good all week and he said he and Papa have to clean the house,” Peter explained with a shrug. 

“Just give me a minute, who else is on?” Micheal yawned. 

“Seborga, Ladonia, Wy, River Hutt, oh! And Kugelmugel is joining after their piano lessons.” Peter explained briefly. 

“Alright, let me find my mouse,” Micheal sighed. He grabbed his laptop and mouse and flopped back onto his bed and turned on discord and grabbed his headset from his lamp on his bed. He got onto discord. “I’ll get on Discord” Micheal hung up as he connected his headphones. He joyed the call.

“Ciao! Micheal! How’s isolation?” Seborga asked with his joy shining through his voice.

“Good, hope ya’ll don’t burn down the meeting house while i’m fucking gone.” Micheal sighed as he logged onto their server. 

“We won’t! You think so lowly of us” Wy huffed annoyed. 

----------

“Kenneth?”

“Yes Alferd?” “Is this the right thing to do?”

“Yes.”

“But people are suffering Kenny” “I know Alfred, but think about it. We can do much more good once we get clean power. He can close the gap” 

“Really?”

“Ofcourse, you have my word and heart of my first land of Vinland”

“Ok” 

“Don’t cry Alfred, I promise this will all get better, ok?” Kennth promised, Alfred just silently nodded an ok. 

///Small  not so much hinted- Hinted Pruame//

“Come on, why don’t you call Gilbert? I’m sure he’ll be overjoyed.” Kenneth suggested. Alfred smiled, wiping his tears away. “Ok” Alfred murmured as he went to grab his phone. 

Alfred sat on his bed calling Gilbert, he kicked his feet as he waited for Gilbert to pick up. 

“Hello?” Gilbert asked.

“Hey Gil,” Alfred said a smile already shining threw his voice. But Gilbert knew Alfred better than that.

“You’ve been crying, Liebling” Gilbert said bluntly.

“I don’t think I can get through this isolation thing, Gil,” Alfred hiccuped. 

Gilbert slowly walked, Alfred through calming down. It was a slow process but Alfred had calmed down after a while, he was curled under the sheets with Gilbert’s hoodie on, it was too big for him but made Alfred feel safe. 

“I’ll stay on the line until you get to sleep alright?” Gilbert asked, he himself was in bed with Gilbird nesting in an old pillow on the nightstand as his old cat purred at his side. 

“Ok Gil.” Alfred yawned, he was tired after his crying.

“Ich liebe dich Liebling” Gilbert said with the most loving voice Alfred could hear,

“Love you too Gilbert.” Alfred yawned, his voice drifting.

[ficrecshetalia]

SENDLINGUR OG SANDLÓA

Author: pyrrhocorax (mniotilta)

Type: Canon

Main characters: Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Iceland (with appearances from Sealand, Ladonia, Estonia, and America)

Summary: During an average summer in modern day, the Nordics meet up in the countryside for a long vacation to relax together. However, with hundreds of years of history between them, old memories get dredged up, both bad and good. Sendlingur og Sandlóa is a story about perspective, of loss and longing, the temperamental nature of both life and human relationships, and family. (Aromantic asexual Iceland, queerplatonic SuNor and EstFin, romantic DenNor and SuFin. Centered around DenNorIce as a family unit but includes other relationships as well. And honestly, even though this is my intent, you can freely interpret the relationships however you see fit and I actively encourage you to do so if you'd like.)

Progress/length: Complete/74,016 words

[gallifreyanlibertea]

You made me cry. That was beautiful.👏🏻🙌. Can I request some Bunny and wolf? I love the sweet stuff, and these guys are naturally fluffy😂

a/n: I don’t remember what this was in reference to LOL but thank you, anon!! 

Odd

“I was wondering if you had… um,” Arthur wondered what it was today. “Some sugar? White sugar.”

Alfred Jones had a sweet tooth, it seemed, because this was the third time this week he had asked Arthur to borrow ingredients for a confection he claimed to be making. And here, Arthur thought wolves were the more savory type.

Well, Alfred was different. He was… odd. Arthur remembered being scared senseless only two weeks ago, when he had moved into the house that was directly beside one that was inhabited by a wolf. Arthur had seen him as he dragged his heavy bags up the steps into his new home. He had remembered watching, wide-eyed, as his new neighbor absent-mindedly peeked into his mailbox, those large, tanned, muscular arms, hanging at the sides of a large, muscular torso- attached to large, muscular legs, and god- Arthur had felt faint. He didn’t recall his realtor telling him there was a wolf in the neighborhood! The man could’ve crushed his skull with his two fingers! He had contemplated turning on his heel and finding another home right then and there, when the wolf had looked up from reading a letter.

He had glanced back down, to which Arthur had wondered how quickly he would have to shift his belongings into the house before the wolf glanced back up in shock at the sight of a rabbit moving in next to him.

It had been not even a second later. The man had glanced back up, blue eyes wide behind his glasses, “Oh- hi, there! You must be the new neighbor.”

Yes, Alfred Jones- as he had introduced himself to Arthur, stammering and red-faced as he had stretched his hand out for Arthur to hesitantly shake- was odd.

And it had taken Arthur far too long to finally understand why Alfred had held the handshake a bit too long, pulling away with a flustered smile and a wag of his tail as he offered to help move Arthur’s heavy bags for him.

“Good afternoon!” Alfred chirped.

Arthur had blinked. It had been days after their first meeting, and Alfred already seemed comfortable enough to peer over the low fence that divided their backyards, half dressed too, and while Arthur had been in the middle of reading a rather good book.

Really, he hadn’t thought it was too hot outside. Patches of clouds blocked the sun’s rays, and a thin layer of dew rested on the grass from the rain that had sprinkled over the yard only half an hour before, so Arthur had dried off his lawn chair and taken a seat. However, as soon as he’d stepped out, Alfred came bumbling out of his own house, shirt coming clean off as soon as Arthur’s eyes rose from his book to meet Alfred’s baby blues.

“It’s boiling out here.” Had been Alfred’s reasoning.

Odd.

Alfred had tripped over the long green hose he used to water his plants. “I’m just out here to garden a bit. I love plants n’ stuff yanno. I have some… um, I have some carrots here too.”

It was funny, Arthur hadn’t recalled there being a garden the first day he’d moved in. It had seemed to appear almost mysteriously the day after: tufts of carrot tops and herb leaves peeked out of the ground, similar to the garden Arthur had set up in his own yard.

“Um, but Mr. Jones-” Arthur had put away his book, “It already rained just a while ago, I don’t know if you should be watering your plants again.”

Alfred blinked. “Oh. Right, yeah, you’re right… I guess I’ll just… go back inside.”

Arthur had smiled, looking back into his book.

“God, I-” Arthur had glanced back up as Alfred cleared his throat to speak again, “I’m really bad at gardening, aren’t I?”

“Well, if I can help in any way, let me know.” Arthur had said in response.

He hadn’t, of course, expected Alfred to ask him to come over to his backyard right this second, it’s urgent! to check on the health of his plants. “I mean, I just wanna make sure they’re not dead. You’re a bunny. Right? You guys know how to take care of plants.”

“Rabbit.” Arthur had corrected. He didn’t know why he hadn’t just conjured an excuse to keep reading. Arthur watched Alfred unhook the fence door and usher Arthur into his yard. 

Needless to say, there was a reason wolves didn’t keep gardens, and Alfred specifically ought to have kept to tradition, because he was in no way competent to handle plant life.

“These plants have been watered to death, Mr. Jones!” Arthur had said with a gasp, a long blond ear twitching at the sight of shriveled, damp leaves strewn across the dark earth, as if bloated.

Arthur wasn’t surprised! Every time Arthur stepped out for some air, it seemed Alfred was outside too, in a manner of seconds, watering his plants.

Never mind it took Arthur weeks to realize the idiot wolf had been doing it as an excuse to ogle Arthur in his shorts. At the moment, Alfred had seemed like a very dedicated man. He’d seemed odd. Arthur had never known a wolf to be one for plant care.

So Arthur had helped him. He’d told him the simplest way to raise new plants and Alfred had listened intently, hanging on to every word that left Arthur’s lips.

Arthur had gone home with his chest swollen with pride at the fact that he’d been of service to a wolf of all people. See, wolves never listened to rabbits, no. The predator-prey instincts of the traits tucked away in their ancestral DNA had led rabbits to shy away from the likes of wolves, and led to a sort of wolf-superiority-complex, despite the fact that at this point, they were more human than anything, save for their few animal features.

Yet there Arthur was! He had been proud of himself to get a man like Alfred to listen to what he had to say.

Of course, Arthur came to realize later that the only service he’d provided Alfred was the red flush in the wolf’s cheeks from having eyed the contours of Arthur’s lips for the entirety of Arthur’s instruction, not having heard a word that came out of Arthur’s mouth over the beating of Alfred’s own heart because, well, Alfred had apparently sported a raging crush on him. 

Arthur should’ve known! Hell, he had been oblivious every single time Alfred mowed his lawn where Arthur could see, shirt discarded as Alfred flexed his muscle for no apparent reason.

Alfred had taken up morning runs at the same time Arthur would embark on his walks- oh wow, funny to see you here, Arthur! Where are you off to? Oh- th- there? Uh… I’m going the same way, actually!

And Alfred would slow down to Arthur’s pace, every time, until Arthur’s morning walks became a time he would walk out in front of Alfred’s door, pausing momentarily until Alfred came out to join him, tail wagging.

Arthur should’ve known simply based on the number of times Alfred needed to borrow flour, or eggs, or milk-

Or sugar, as Alfred asked two weeks after they’d met.

Arthur had let him in, as always, “Are you a baker, Alfred?”

“Uh, I guess you could say I dabble?” Was Alfred’s weak reply, “I was just in the mood for making some… um… cake.”

“What kind of cake?” Arthur asked politely, searching his cupboards for his jar of sugar.

“… carrot cake!” Alfred blurted. Arthur raised a brow, unknown to the wolf behind him.

“Carrot? I didn’t think wolves liked carrots.”

Arthur’s ear twitched to the sound behind him, or rather, a lack thereof. Arthur heard a sharp inhale, and then, nothing, as if Alfred had held his breath.

“Nah, I like all sorts of… vegetables. I’m not really a meat kinda guy.”

Arthur turned at that, “You don’t eat meat?”

Alfred winced, “No, I lied. I do.”

Arthur furrowed his brows, to which Alfred sighed in what looked like defeat. Blue eyes were trained on the floor.

“Look, I mean, I could stop eating it if that’s what you want. I could go vegetarian.”

“I beg your pardon?” Arthur said, “What? Wh- why on earth would I want you to go vegetarian, Alfred? Are you alright?”

“I mean, it’s not going to be too difficult! I’ll do it.” Alfred said, as if convincing Arthur, and it really didn’t make a lick of sense to him! That seemed apparent by the look in Arthur’s eyes because Alfred chewed his lip, “I mean, I had a roommate back in college that dated a rabbit and she made him go vegan so, if you get what I mean…”

And Arthur had laughed. He laughed because he was an idiot, an oblivious bumbling idiot! “Alfred, come on now, I wouldn’t make a friend go vegan!”

Alfred had paused, eyes dragging up from the floor to look at Arthur with a look of disbelief that Arthur hadn’t understood. “A friend?”

See, Arthur had mistaken it for doubt. He’d pressed the jar of sugar into Alfred’s hands with a reassuring smile, “I don’t mind your habits, or you being a wolf, really. You’ve been a great neighbor and a great friend.”

Alfred took the sugar, eyes retreating back to look at the floor. “Right. Okay. Thank you for the sugar, I’ll- I’ll bring it back as soon as I’m done.”

“Have fun,” Arthur said with a smile as Alfred shut the door behind him, and then he paused, smile melting away. The gears in his brain clicked into place as he gasped, hands cupping his mouth. “Oh!”

It was now that Arthur finally got it, it all made sense, and he was a colossal, dimwitted fool!

Of course, Alfred had just poured his heart out and Arthur had laughed and called him a friend. Although he was in no way obligated to say yes even though Alfred had asked, Alfred deserved a proper, well-meaning rejection! They were neighbors for god’s sake! They would be seeing each other every day, and Arthur had gone and made it all awkward. He’d ruined it all.

Arthur reached for the door handle. He then paused. What would he even say?

I’m truly so sorry, Alfred, I misunderstood what you meant and I- then what? I think we would be better friends?

Did Arthur really believe that?

He hadn’t given it much thought. The only men Arthur had ever dated were rabbits like himself, so he’d seen nothing in Alfred but the wolf that lived next door.

Right?

Arthur furrowed his brows, taking to pacing across the floor. 

Well, since when was he in the habit of putting away a book to help a neighbor? Arthur wasn’t necessarily a ‘good bunny’. He preferred solitude to anything, yet every morning, he waited for that wagging tail and those bright, blue eyes.

Now that he thought about it, how had he noticed that Alfred would take to flexing as he mowed the lawn if Arthur hadn’t been looking out his window to watch it? He could’ve gone back to doing whatever he’d been doing but no, Arthur was watching. He was always shamelessly watching, turning away only when he felt Alfred was about to glance up and find him looking. 

It seemed Arthur was just as much oblivious to himself as he was to Alfred Jones.

So before he knew it, Arthur was knocking at his neighbor’s door. Alfred opened up before Arthur could even knock the second time. “Hey, what’s up?”

Arthur froze, tongue numb in his mouth. It seemed that once he’d come to terms with everything, Alfred suddenly seemed so intimidating. Not quite in the sharp-fanged predator sort of way- rather, as the attractive neighbor next door. The two shared a similarity in that Arthur truly felt like a cornered animal of prey.

His tail twitched, but he was glad it was far too small for Alfred to see. “Have you started making the cake yet?”

“No,” Alfred said, hand coming to scratch the back of his head sheepishly. “I was going to in a while-”

“Good, I was hoping you’d say that.” Arthur said feverishly, “I was thinking I could help since you probably don’t know how to make it.”

Alfred laughed lightly, “Yeah, I really don’t. I’d appreciate the assistance.”

He moved aside, making way for Arthur to enter.

Arthur paused halfway through the door. “Alfred, I completely misunderstood what you had said, I’m so sorry I didn’t give you a proper response.”

“Misunderstood?” Alfred said, and Arthur walked further into the house, hearing Alfred shut the door behind him.

“Well, I didn’t know you were… that you-”

“That I liked you?” Alfred completed. Arthur’s cheeks flushed in response as he turned to face Alfred.

“Yes. I don’t want you to think I’d ever want someone to change the way they are for me, or-”

“Hey, it’s no worries!” Alfred said. His tail swished behind him. His eyes twinkled in slight mirth, an expression Arthur could sense was forced. “I didn’t think you would, but you know how crazy a crush can make somebody. You don’t have to give me an answer for my sake, I’ll survive. Let’s make some cake!”

He then turned to enter his kitchen, shuffling around pots and pans, “Say, I really have no idea what to use, mind helping me out?”

When Arthur didn’t reply, nor did he move, Alfred turned to face him, smile melting into a slight look of concern. “You okay?”

“I think you misunderstood me.”

Alfred furrowed his brows. HIs grey ears flattened against his caramel blond hair in mild confusion. “Huh?”

“I don’t want you to think you’d need to change the way you are… when you’re dating me.”

And those ears perked up just as fast as a smile spilled from Alfred’s lips, as fast as he practically stumbled out of the kitchen over to Arthur, tail wagging. 

“When I’m dating you?”

“Yes.” Arthur replied, cheeks tinted pink, “I was hoping this carrot cake would be our first one. Our first date, I mean.”

Silence. Alfred grinned, “Then let’s start dating.”

Of course, like Arthur had expected, Alfred hadn’t really liked the carrot cake. The wolf wrinkled his nose after the first fork-full, glancing over at Arthur with a pout, “You said I wouldn’t have to change myself for you, right?”

And Arthur laughed, brushing the flour off Alfred’s cheekbone because really, this whole situation was nothing but odd- Arthur could imagine his mother’s shrieking if he ever told her he was romantically involved with a wolf.

A wolf with sweet blue eyes, tan skin that glowed under the kitchen light, and grey ears that twitched atop his blond hair when he smiled. Arthur forked another chunk of cake into his mouth, “There’s more for me, then.”

Alfred smiled, tail wagging blissfully behind him as he leaned forward to press his elbows onto the countertop, cradling his face in his hands. “Since we’re on the topic of things you rabbits love, I absolutely hate gardening, hate everything about it. I only watered those plants to check you out.”

“I figured, Alfred.”

[hetalia-the-ghost-turnip]

Hi me again

I’m busy trying to find/write more sarcastic lines but while you’re waiting for that collection here’s another one

Did I say one I clearly meant two

[koolkat9]

Happy Hetalia day or the 16th anniversary at least everyone!

God damn I've been in the fandom for five long years. It feels a lot longer than that honestly.

I'm not sure what to do to celebrate so why not tell my fandom story.

So I got into it Hetalia at 13 after watching a top 10 Christmas episodes in Anime video. For awhile I thought this was from the channel Anime America, but I’ve recently discovered it was actually a WatchMojo video lol. Basically I got most of my anime recommendations from videos like that. A couple months later and I finally got around to watching Hetalia. I almost quit the series three episodes in because I watched the dub and some of the jokes made me...uncomfy... at times. But for one reason or another I returned to it a few days later and then it just...stuck with me. 

For awhile I just consumed content for the series in private. I watched AMVs, those ship videos with (often uncredited) fanart and a song fitting the ship in the background, read all the GerIta fics I could find, downloaded like all of the character songs. I even got Pinterest behind my parents’ back just to look at fanart xD (don’t lie to your parents kids. Don’t worry I stayed safe and just looked at fanart). 

Of course I read Auf Wiedersehen Sweet Heart. It was probably one of the first few Hetalia fanfics I read). I haven’t read it since I was 13 but I remember it being well written and it made me realize just how good fanfiction could be.

Somewhere in that exploration of content beyond the anime, I found Kyokoon’s channel through Dreamtalia and discovered the world of hetagames. Honestly, at the time I found Dreamtalia, my obsession with Hetalia was waning. Like I still liked the series, but I almost completely stopped consuming fan content unless it came across my dash. I got into it at a good time when the game was pretty much complete save for some unfinished screenshots and I got to the point where I was watching it unfold weekly. I remember the day I was supposed to leave for my end of the year school trip (which would last a few days), I got up extra early to watch the new episode of the lp because it was close to the end and thus they were leaving it off at a bunch of cliff hangers and I had to find out what happened next. Eventually I joined Kyo’s discord server, introducing me to discord for the first time. In conclusion, Dreamtalia played a huge role in my early fandom experience and later on down the line it would play an even bigger role in my current experience. 

So, once again, I consumed all the fan content I could find, mainly being Gerita. Through Dreamtalia, I found other hetalia youtubers.  Hetafacts was probably  the other channel that I frequented the most as I loved their theories so much. I ended up making Kaitlyn (a secretary/self-insert oc) and I even made a fanfic of her. My art style started to become inspired by Hetalia. I got my first fictional crush on England, read my first reader x character fanfictions. Things were going great!

Then IT happened. Dreamtalia came back, finally complete with all screenshots and everything. I of course, loving the game watched the new lp. As I’ve explained before: hand-holding buddies happened and I got pulled into GerEng, the world of multishipping and rarepair hell. Not long after, I read the book “Fangirl” and have the strong urge to write fanfiction. Having just gotten into GerEng and loving Arthur I decided to start off writing for them. A year or so later I joined tumblr to share fanart and get in touch with other fans. I joined a bunch of discord servers and eventually made my own. I made my own ask blog after being inspired by asking-gereng and ask-aph-fruk (which I have scrolled through multiple times because I still love both blogs to death). 

Through Hetalia I was able to find my passion for writing (which I’m now hoping to pursue as career), my love of history and make many wonderful, talented online friends. Though the series itself and the fandom is controversial, I’ve been lucky and have had nothing but good experiences within the fandom and it’s changed my life for the better. It’s one of my greatest comforts and I can’t imagine a life without it. 

[esoteric-champagne]

Liech is a wonderful cute girl.

Participate in the beta read in my tag “hetalia fanfiction”.

[breitzbachbea]

📒💖

Emi, I'm kissing you on the mouth right now, you're so sexy. In general but also for taking the bait.

Put “📓” or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I’ll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven’t written but daydream about.

The Constantinople AU

This AU is from 2017 and came about because I watched a TED-ED video about Constantinople's walls, relistened to the Aladdin soundtrack and because I had earlier talked with a friend about how I had not really seen people make a genie a woman. I came back years later to explain it to my friend Jonah and add new stuff and this year I showed it to @amber-isnt-a-precious-stone to add even more things. It's one of my favourite AUs for sure.

Dramatis Personae:

- Herakles Karpuzi (APH Greece) as Son of the Roman emperor and heir to the throne - Sadık Adnan (APH Turkey) as Soldier in the Ottoman army and Imposter Prince - Dilan Taş (Human OC) as Jinn and Sadık's unsuccessful wingwoman - Athanasios Karpuzi (Human OC) as the Roman emperor and serial skirtchaser - Salvatore Vento (Human OC) as Advisor to the emperor and Fuckface McBadDad - Michele Vento (APH Sicily) as Herakles' childhood friend

The Happenings™:

- It's set in Constantinople in an alternate Universe, close to ours. It’s the late High Middle Age/Early Late Middle Age (depending on how you want to periodize. I am working with how the German Middle Ages are divided, which is arguably a very bad method for classifying Byzantine. But this is my silly Hetalia AU, not my term paper). Around 1300, I’d say.

- Athansios Karpuzi is the current Roman Emperor, which makes Herakles the heir to the throne. Athanasios is desperately trying to wed his son off to any available suitors to form new alliances, but two things keep getting into the way: 1. Herakles is thoroughly uninterested in playing along with Athanasios’ plans. He’s not a chess piece on his father’s board if he's got anything to say about it. 2. Salvatore Vento is Athanasios’ closest consultant and protests any marriage for whatever reason he can find. For the sole reason that he has been eyeing the throne for himself the entire time and wants to marry his own son, Michele, to Herakles.

- Like in my Hetalia AU "Like Father Like Son", Salvatore and Athanasios trust each other as far as they can throw one another. There is no genuine trust here at all, no sympathy, really, they just stick together because they know the other is useful. Have some assorted banter as result of this:

Salvatore: "Immortal what a name! What a title to bear! Although immoral would have fit you much better." [Athanasios’ etymology is “immortal”]

S: "Maybe you wouldn't have to struggle to find a suitable bride for your son if you stopped dragging every young woman within and from outside Constantinople to bed." Athanasios: "He's into guys too, problem solved." S: "Oh, yeah, me dumbass thought you needed stop whoring around, how silly of me."

A: "If he is into anything at all. But if I have another child, they might keep this empire going." S: "No legitimation to the lineage's claim to power like a gay loner and a bastard child." A: "Ah yes, I hired the man whose wife ran away with his son so he could berate me about family life. How I value your opinion, Salvatore." S: "She didn't run away." A: "No, she just hides and sends you people until she can get her divorce. I'm very inclined to give it to her."

S: "They're childhood friends! They'd make a great couple!" A: "All I can hear is what a great emperor you'd make, ruling on my corpse."

- So. Herakles is staunchly resisting any marriage to anyone and minding his business one day, walking along the great walls of Constantinople. He stops to look out into the surrounding area and suddenly, hears a noise. Confused, he looks down and sees someone scaling the wall. Sadık looks up and sees the most beautiful man he has ever seen … spotting him trying to get into the city.

- Sadık is part of the Ottoman Turks, who’re conquering the area around Constantinople these days. He’s some nobody in the army and thought he’d give it a shot and get into the city by himself to earn some fame (and money).

- Herakles is seriously impressed Sadık managed to actually almost scale the famously impenetrable walls of the city. Not impressed enough to actually let him in. So these two banter a bit, Sadık now distracted by this hunk in front of his nose. Herakles correctly assesses that he’s a Turk and says of himself that he’s the emperor’s son. Sadık: “Hey, hot stuff, if that’s true and it’s so impressive, why don’t you let me in as a reward?” Herakles: “Yes, of course. And then I’ll open the gates for the rest of your people, so that you can just walk in and take the city. What impossible thing do you want to happen next, a kiss on the mouth?” Sadık: “What’s so impossible about that?”

- Either way, Herakles threatens to sick the guards on him, which leads to a “Oh no you wouldn’t” - Herakles grins and definitely would, so Sadık has to retreat. (#Don’tSickTheGuardsOnMyAssYou’reSoSexyAhaha).

- He goes back to camp, having gained nothing but a crush. He gets in real trouble for rummaging around the booty, where he finds an oil lamp and WOULDN’T YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. Dilan, a Jinn, pops out and Sadık uses his first wish to get out of trouble. Once that is done and the two have a moment of peace, he's thinking about what to do next and his mind circles back to Herakles.

- Dilan: "Ah yes, they always want something with love ... so who struck you and what's the problem?" Sadık: "Well ... I don't really know if it's true but he said he was the son of the emperor. He certainly looked the part! And I didn't really want to wait for him to call the guards to confirm it." Dilan: "Wait ... so you want to get with the son of the Roman emperor?" Sadık: "If that handsome little shit didn't lie to me, then yes." Dilan: "Isn't that a little out of your ballpark?" Sadık: "What, is it out of yours? Can't help me in that case, magic lady?" Dilan: "Psht, don't make me laugh! I can make the impossible happen, just tell me what you need." Sadık: "I dunno ... I guess getting inside the city?" Dilan: "That's it? That's all you need? That's less than a no-brainer -" Sadık: "Oh yeah, if it's so easy then, save that second wish for later. I got past one of the walls already once, I'll figure that out without your magic." Dilan: "Alright, alright ... and what about the wooing of your sweetheart?" Sadık: "That we'll see to once we're there ..."

- Dilan and Sadık chitchat while they make it to Constantinople. Dilan spends some time in the lamp, because walking is boring, but she does tell him that she's pretty sick of being in there. So that's where Sadık learns about her wishing to be free. Dilan in turn learns that Sadık doesn't have such a rosy life either (especially because now he can't return to the army, after he basically deserted).

- So they get to Constantinople and decide to actually factcheck if they got the right guy - and if yes, some general information about the emperor's son. Luckily enough, a friendly trader/tradesman tells them a bit about the city and the imperial family. Dilan: "So, did you by any chance ever see the emperor's son?" Trader: "Oh, well, that's an odd question, isn't it? But since you don't seem to be from here, I can understand the curiosity. Well, let me think ... You often see him only from afar ... during a triumph where he had accompanied his father during the campaign I got to see him up close. What a regal figure there at the head of the troops!" Sadık is too lost in the vision of his crush all decked out in military gear on a horse. And then taking all that gear off and being a regal figure while he fucks Sadık into the sheets … Dilan: "Yeah, yeah, yadda yadda, we need something more concrete. Height, hairstyle, haircolour, what does the dude look like?" The trader/tradesman is a little baffled but does provide a description that lines up with who Sadık saw. So with that information, they start to wonder how to woo a future emperor.

- Luckily, now that the trader/tradesman thinks they're here for imperial gossip, he actually mentions the fact that Emperor Athanasios hopes for his son to follow his footsteps and is currently looking for a suitable match, so that Herakles can be of political use even while he's still in charge. So Dilan and Sadık get an idea how to get into the city and Herakles heart. Or his pants. Milestones are still up for negotiation.

- After the grand entrance happened, where Herakles definitely took offense at either "Heard your prince was a sight lovely to see" or "Heard your prince was hot, where is he?" because either question was accompanied by Sadık's flirty looks, Athanasios actually lets Sadık and Dilan into the palace. There he and Salvatore discuss the entire thing, aka if whoever Sadık pretends to be is a good match.

- While they talk political stuff and snark, because of course Salvatore is against it, Sadık continues to feel very smug in his new princely identity and makes flirty eyes at Herakles. Herakles is just like "ugh" and much more happily plays with his cats. Which tbh sounds like they're 16 or something, but they're not that much younger than in canon (I think they'd be 22 and 24 here).

- Hijinks ensue. Herakles tells his dad that he’s a Turkish soldier that tried to sneak into the city and Athanasios doesn’t believe him, thinking Herakles is now lying badly to not get married. Dilan and Sadık are developing a friendship that is best described as hoes being bros.

- Dilan: "Look, you like cats. Cats are furry. Hairy, if you will. You know who else is hairy? Sadık. He's juuust as hairy as a cat - shhhht, I'm wingmanning for you and it's working great, you can thank me later."

- At first, Dilan mostly employs her magic for some silly little things with Sadık to woo Herakles. It doesn't work very well. Herakles: "I know it's magic, that's not impressing me - Okay, it is kinda cool, but you're still a dick." Dilan: "But a dick with a cool sidekick, come ON! What else do you want me to do to make the nerd viable?!" Sadık: "You call that wingmanning?!"

- Once Dilan realizes dickbags Athanasios and Salvatore are, she also uses little magic tricks to continously make their lives worse. Ironically, this may be what finally endears her and Sadık to Herakles. (If you haven't noticed, he doesn't like his father very much and Athanasios doesn't care for him aside from being a political pawn).

- At one point, Michele shows up at court! Herakles is overjoyed to see his childhood friend, which he hadn’t seen in years! Sadık is absolutely not, because it looks like just when he and Herakles almost had something, this twat shows up and steals the show!

- Dilan: "Well, I can't make him not love this dude, but I could beat the dude up." Sadık: " ... keep that in mind."

- However, when Dilan goes to investigate what Michele is doing here (and wingwomanning again), this ensues: Dilan: "Hey brah, what's up, why so blue looking? Is it because your boo just told you you ain't his number one anymore?" Michele: "I, eh ... no ... May I ask who you are?" Dilan: "Just one of the servants of the insanely charming and powerful - and hairy - Prince who's here to marry the Prince. Yep, he's sooo gonna marry that guy." Dilan: "There was a whole musical number about it, you should have seen it, I was on top of my game." Michele: "Sure heard about it, you stirred up trouble here. Hope it helps ... I'm not saying that Herakles should marry someone his dad set in front of him, but it'd be nice if he found someone at last. He told me he was very lonely the last years ... I don't want to leave him behind just as lonely again." Dilan: "Yeah, it'd be - Leave him behind?"

- Dilan: "Good news! His loverboy is not here to stay! He wants to go to the west, he's just here because of his terrible dad!" Sadık: "Oh, that's good! Wait ... isn't his father that asshole of an advisor?" Dilan: "Yeah. Why." Sadık: "The guy who wanted to marry his son to Herakles since apparently forever?" Dilan: "Yeah, but his son is not going to marry him." Sadık: "I smell a trap 10 miles against the wind."

- There is no trap however. Herakles realizes that the crush on Michele is nothing but a childhood crush and has to be left in the past … and that he wants to move forward with Sadık. When he wants a conversation one-on-one, Dilan wants to make it a one-on-two, but Herakles asks her if she doesn’t want to keep Michele company in the gardens, it’s not gonna take long, an hour or two at most. Then she can also fetch Michele when they’re done, so that Herakles can say goodbye before he leaves for Sicily.

- Dilan thinks about it, finds it’s not a trap (and if it was, nothing she and her fists couldn’t solve) and goes in the garden. There she talks with Michele and makes the mistake to either show off her magic powers, tell Michele of TurGre’s meetugly (#Don’tSickTheGuardsOnMyAssYou’reSoSexyAhaha) or to be like: “Hey, do you wanna know a cool secret? Sadık isn’t a Prince, all of this is my doing. Pretty cool, eh?”

- Unfortunately, they’re not alone. Salvatore was searching for Michele in the gardens, to get his “fucking rotten brat of a son” to play along after all instead of disappearing once again. So he overhears this. Salvatore: "Oh, so Prince Sadık is not a Prince? That's a funny joke indeed and I'll laugh my ass off the hardest in the end."

- So just when Herakles and Sadık had time to talk about their feelings and confess and, also, you know, make out and fumble for good measure, they get interrupted. Literally when Herakles was finally stripped down to his tunic and Sadık slid his hand underneath it.

- Athanasios: "This is gonna be the last wall you breached, you little rat." Herakles: "Dad! Stop it!" Athanasios: "This man nearly ruined our dynasty. Arrest him." Salvatore: "Arrest the man indeed. Go and get the ex-emperor." Athanasios: "Ex-Prince. It's not the right time for your snark." Salvatore: "I'm not talking about that small fish. Guards - arrest this careless idiot who nearly ruined our city by letting a scammer into its walls! Clearly the emperor's been in on this and can't be trusted!" Athanasios: "You've lost your mind." Salvatore: "You've lost yours and it's actually the thing you'll miss the least when syphilis is going to eat away the last of your rotten brain in the dungeons. So get him! And that ottoman faker, too, just get the trash out of here."

- The scene ends rather dramatically, because I love the thought of Michele and Dilan rushing to their help, but they get held back. Dilan maybe gets restrained by some anti-magic stuff. And Dilan begs Sadık to use his last wish to help him. To solve this problem. But Sadık refuses, because he promised to use it to set her free. So Dilan is just livid and upset, distraught, yelling at him to let her do something while he gets taken to the dungeons.

- So now Salvatore’s in charge and setting his plans into motion. PR is of course the first thing that needs to be done, so there’s a speech to Constantinople’s masses: "But, as you know, I respect and regard the royal family, the entire dynasty, more than any of you! So I am not going to assume power, it'd be a crime against God himself who granted us this emperor, if I had removed him for anything but his unstable condition and his tragic mistake of almost letting his lineage being tainted! Not to mention that this would have been the end of our beloved empire, our city, suddenly overrun and ruled by those barbarians! No, of course I'll give my power to the true heir who was merely a victim to his father's incompetence. To prove I really mean it, I'm even going to give up my son to the Prince, to forever bind my loyality to the throne!"

- Michele: "I hold no more respect for you as father as I did when we left. I'm not going to play along your perverted plan." Salvatore: "Well Michele, if you don't respect me as father, then maybe you'll respect me as the Roman Emperor!"

- Meanwhile, in the dungeons, Athanasios and Sadık have some great chitchat. Sadık: "Guess that's some quality father and son in law bonding time, eh?” S:“Though I'm pretty sure your son would rather call me daddy than you." A: "Once this entire drama is over, I'll have you decapitated. Or just kick you back to your people and let them handle this." S: "Ah, but when I came here as a fake prince, your arms and gates were wide open. Should've listened to your son when he told you so."

- Here’s also some Salvatore content: Athanasios: "And now you strut around in my clothes. I'm surprised they even fit you fatass!" Salvatore: "Oh, the entire imprisonment is really getting to you, ain't it, emperor tightlips? Ah, I meant - ex-emperor tight lips. Now you've sunk low enough to insult me with such details. Is it because you have nothing else left now that you're off your high horse?" Salvatore: "I thought so. At least you're enough of a sound mind to not threaten me with 'once I get out of here' hot air. Because we both know you're not getting out of here in a lifetime anymore. And yes, I’m wearing your rags, since I’ve got no time to waste.” Salvatore to Sadık: "Actually, it's sad that you aren't going to be there to watch it. Although, I think a public execution would just spice the entire wedding festivities up, if I think about it."

- Ah yes. The wedding. Herakles: "You look great today, my love. Like a polished jewel." Michele: "Thanks. I'd never seen a man more handsome than you though. Truly, a prince with all his qualities seen right away." Both: -sigh- Ft. Dilan, who’s just watching the kids sadly and is trying to reassure them she got this, she’s gonna find a way, it’ll be fine!!!

- Herakles and Michele wonder why Sadık didn't use that wish. To which Dilan replies he said he'd free her with it, but she didn't believe he'd actually uphold that promise. And he shouldn't have because now she's useless and he's in trouble. (And Hera only falls more in love with Sadık, because being a good person is HELLA swoony.)

- Dilan also tries to cheer them up and I believe she can still do small magic tricks, she just can't get out of whatever shackles/confinement she is in. So when she isn't despairing or raging, she tries to cheer Herakles and Michele up with some silly little tricks. She shapeshifts into their fathers to make fun of them. Which leads them to an idea ...

- I have no idea what it is though. I only know that the grand final and resolution involves shapeshifting. If anyone who's better at plots wants to give me ideas, please do.

- However they manage to stop Salvatore's machinations, this is what follows: Salvatore gets thrown into the dungeons. Herakles decides to not let his father out and instead take the crown himself. He becomes emperor and marries Sadık. Sadık uses his last wish to set Dilan free. Michele goes to travel to Sicily, promising he’ll write letters to them and come visit some day (Dilan promises the same).

- The end of Salvatore and Athanasios rotting in jail together is SO satisfying to me, bc now that they are useless to each other, there is nothing left to do but be a pain in each other’s ass. They hate each other and they DESERVE EACH OTHER.

Sequel Bait:

- Before we get to the sequel bait, let me give you some prequel bait for a change. Here's a little "what if one of the many suitable matches for Herakles had been one of the Beilschmidt brothers" scenario. Plus free medieval history lesson:

- Now for the actual sequel: Three years come and go. Herakles and Sadık settle in their new rules as emperor and ... emperor's husband. (I don't know if Byzantine empresses were "put into office" in the same way the Emperor was. If someone is more knowledgeable about this than me, correct me).

- Their marriage is going swell, however both struggle in their new official roles. Herakles faces all the administrative problems and tough decisionmaking that comes with being a ruler, while Sadık struggles to be accepted by the people of Constantinople. Where Herakles tends to take care of the court, Sadık tries his hand at being a military leader.

- One morning, Sadık wakes up with Herakles in the room. Which should not be surprising, if it wasn't for the fact that Herakles had left the city yesterday. He's oddly nonchalant about it when Sadık asks him and also ... weirdly chipper? Eager? Kitschy in his flirting? He's at first flattered, but soon very confused by everything and wonders if either he hit his head real hard in his sleep or if Herakles fell off his horse when he tried to make it out of the city.

- Turns out none of it, because after some more eyelash fluttering, his "husband" goes POOF! and turns out to be Dilan, who's on the floor laughing. "You should have seen your stupid face! Really! Wait, I'll show you!"

- After Dilan is done shapeshifting into Sadık, absolutely overacting his reaction and argueing with him about it, they finally get to catch up. Turns out that Dilan was bored by travelling around the world and wanted to check in on her old buddy.

- She couldn't have chosen a more opportune time to do so. Once Herakles returns, he ... at first has a weird reunion with his husband. Sadık is kind of wary around him and starts to list his attitude and general personality traits/ticks as proof for ... something. Takes a while for Herakles to get the news that Dilan is back, too.

- Herakles is very relieved to hear that! He wanted to confide something in Sadık, because after he had returned to the city, someone had taken him aside. Natasa Simonides, an old and trusted courtly advisor, needed help. Recently, her husband Ibrahim disappeared and she's worried.

- Natasa also told Herakles a secret: Ibrahim is a Jinn, which is why his disappearance worries her even more. Herakles informs Sadık and asks Dilan if she knows anything, but she sadly hasn't heard anything either. - Before she can zip off and see if she can find Ibrahim, Herakles asks another favour of her - to educate Natasa's twins, Timothea Farah and Omar Veniam instead. Natasa thinks they may be able to find their father, but they don't know they're half-Jinn, so they'd need some guidance. Dilan happily agrees to be their teacher!

- My only more in-depth infos on Jinn and their children with humans comes from this Monstrum video by PBS Storied. I don't think Thea & Omar would need to be taught by anyone to be seers and how to be in communication with non-human spheres, but it makes for a better story.

- So Dilan is off to teach the kids while Sadık volunteers to go and search for Ibrahim. Herakles resumes his imperial role in the city.

- It's not really fun and as the people become more and more agitated with the status quo, more and more people "remember" that the old emperor is still around. Enough people are going "What's that kid knowing anyways?! All those highfangled ideas and useless reforms, for what?" that a select few decide to stage a coup by releasing Athanasios from the dungeons.

- Now, I still haven't decided if Salvatore also gets let out. The problem is that I really would begrudge him his freedom ... but I also begrudge Athanasios his freedom! It doesn't feel fair that one bastard gets to walk free and the other doesn't!

- Out in the field, Sadık isn't having much more luck. No Jinn in sight and the trouble he has with a few of the men that accompany him keeps him thinking about the acceptance problems again. He really wishes at one point that Herakles wasn't emperor at all. You can imagine how terrible he feels for these thoughts when news of the coup catches up to them. Be careful what you wish for and all that jazz. On top of that, he gets into trouble as well - betrayed by some of the men he had taken along. He gets stuck in some place like a cave or an abandoned house he was investigating ...

- Sadık finds a large sealed bottle and thinks 'Well, what's the worst that could happen?' He is greeted by a GIANT cloud of smoke instead of anything edible/drinkable. By the time the cloud is human-shaped, he already has a giant grin on his face. Sadık: "Hah! I have a sixth sense for this kind of stuff!" Jinn: "Greetings, mor-" Sadık: "Yeah, yeah, quick question, is your name Ibrahim? Or do you know one of your kind called Ibrahim who's been passing through recently?" Jinn: "My name is Ibrahim - " Sadık: "Great! You know a Greek lady called Natasa? I take that look as a yes. Okay, so first wish is to get us out of here, second wish we'll see, third is like freeing you from the whole servitude bit - You do the three wishes thing, right? Anyways, your wife and kids are wishing for dad to come home, so get us out of here, you'll get explanations on the way back."

- In the meantime, Dilan and her protégés, along with Natasa and Herakles, have been trying to figure out how to solve the problem at court. It doesn't help that the news of Sadık's troubles also reached them (I know the speed of spreading information may be historically hella inaccurate, but I need it for the drama). So Dilan is torn between helping her best bud and helping the rest at court. The Greeks cook up a plan and assure her that she should go and help Sadık, they've got this.

- The plan is to get Athanasios to do something incredibly stupid that would immediately turn the people against him. They exploit the fact that Athanasios likes to listen to words that fall from pretty lady's mouths. So Timothea flatters her eyelashes and promises to tell him something of a vision she had ... that the divine has something to tell him through her. (Don't worry for her, she may have to endure his fingers under her chin, which is infuriating and nauseous enough, but no more skin contact than this). Thea gets backed by her brother to lend it more credibility once Athanasios considers with his head and not his dick.

- And we can all appreciate that Dilan has been sent away, otherwise the scene would have been like this: Thea: "The spirits are talking to me about you ... " Dilan: "Mhm, mhm, indeed, I can hear them to. They're saying that you're a bitch!"

- Dilan in the meantime reaches Sadık, Ibrahim and those of his troop that haven't betrayed and abandoned him as soon as they heard of the coup. A little happy reunion before she immediately fills them in on what's happening.

- They come up with a plan themselves to finally get rid of Athanasios and the Simonides and Herakles have begun to sweat a little back home, because Athanasios mistake of listening to the twins' advice has bought them time, but not really solved the problem yet. Which is when Dilan and Ibrahim sweep in, concocting an illusion powerful enough to wrap up everyone in Constantinople and make Athanasios seem like the literal devil. Some mass-hallucination miracle bullshit, truly, to assert that he doesn't deserve the throne.

- Maybe for good measure, Athanasios disappears after the illusion is over. Dilan and Ibrahim have no idea where he went, they say with a smile.

- Another grand finale! The four lovers are reunited, Thea and Omar are overjoyed to have their dad back and he is overjoyed to have his kids back. When Dilan tells the Simonides twins that they did a great job, she's a good teacher after all haha!, Ibrahim and Natasa invite her to stay. Dilan says that they don't need her, surely, now that Ibrahim can teach them, but Ibrahim says he could use some help. Herakles also encourages her, saying that he'd love to have her at court - and Sadık also bullies her into staying. "What do you wanna do, see the world again? Didn't do much for your peanut brain the first time around, maybe hit the books together with Hera so that you'll be a passable teacher some day."

- Dilan and Omar also have evolved a crush on one another during this entire mess. That's what I'll leave you with - all well that ends well.

Also hey you! Thanks for reading all of this! Here's a little bonus content if you made it this far!

A wonderful fanart of Michele and Salvatore by my beloved friend C0FFINATED over on twitter!

Here's an amazing commission of the Greeks and Turks by @captkirkland ! I'm not sure if I'm allowed to repost the pictures myself on tumblr & you shoud reblog it from him anyways. Show him and his amazing art some love! From left to right it's Timothea, Herakles, Omar, then Dilan, Sadık and Havva (who's not featured in this AU, rip. Things would have worked to well with their brainpower).

Thanks for reading this! Hope you have a wonderful day!

[pndglcs]

fanfiction: it was just six in the morning

Pairing: APH England/APH Spain

Rating: Explicit

Summary: they woke up way too early to begin the usual routine line-ups and they knew how to spend the time.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23773171

yes, explicit fic again baby ;)