#aperfectexampleofsarcasm

[alpacalmond]

happy birthday cuck

[amporazz]

@aperfectexampleofsarcasm said: theres a bpd discord and someone in it ate jelly made of their own piss and someone else made a callout post about it. apparently its been revealed the jelly was lemon but theres no proof either way

--

oh??

my god.

not to be a piss-jello apologist but why would that warrant a callout post. it’s gross as hell, but ultimately harmless? i think?? that is wild either way

[ayanak-archive]

hey ik u got a lot of asks for certain characters for the style ratings but could you also do dave if u get around to it? theyre so good and pure ! ur doing gods work

I’m going to do Dave next! I’m glad you like them.

[feraldavestrider]

url change from aperfectexampleofsarcasm

hey everyone decided to actually do it so my url is now feraldavestrider esketit

[nomoreheroes]

@aperfectexampleofsarcasm

[uiyutrentasei]

Three Fandoms Meme

I was tagged by @hal-strider thanks :)

Rules: Choose any three fandoms and answer the questions, then tag 10 people you want to know better.

My Three Fandoms:

Homestuck

Steven Universe

Star Trek

The first character you loved:

Rose.......

Amethyst! friend sized 

Spock???? just look at him

The character you never expected to love so much:

John tbh . maybe dirk? maybe both

Pearl...... i used to hate her

do i say it? im saying it . im gonna . im gonna say it . Sulu . there, i said it

The character you relate to the most:

im gonna say jade like the actual madman i am

Peridot >:)c

Kirk because i, too, am a mess

(after a second inspection i realised that all three of these characters are a mess so yeah that explains a lot)

The character you’d slap:

honestly ? Caliborn? but just to see his reaction

fucking Lars

Kirk but just because hes hot when hes bruised

Three favorite characters (in order of preference):

John, Roxy, Dirk

Peridot, Connie, Sadie

SULU, Spock, Kirk

A character you liked at first but don’t anymore:

none of them! theyre all good characters, i just dislike how jade was used and moved around as a prop for the plot to move on

Lars. just because i feel like the crew is......... not doing a good job characterizing him anymore

that one cute alien in the third movie that turns out to be evil? what a bitch

Three otps:

oh....... uh...................... dirkjohn, davekat, roxy x calliope ? i dont know their ship name :)

i actually dont have SHIPS per se, but i do think that lapis and peridot are cute . and ruby and sapphire sure love each other goddamn

look............... sulu and his husband are perfect i have nothing else to add 

I tag @alpacalmond @aperfectexampleofsarcasm @ewooon and @taggedgore

yall better do this

[hal-strider]

 I was tagged by @aperfectexampleofsarcasm​ @uiyutrentasei​ and @alpacalmond​

how tall are you:  I’m 5′0/152.4 cm 

what colour are your eyes: I have hazel eyes but they change depending on my mood, like if im angry they turn red and if im  happy they are purple :)

do you wear contacts and/or glasses: im amazing and have perfect vision sometimes 

do you wear braces: no but i should

what is your fashion style: mostly just hoodies and leggings. I would really like to show off and wear really cute clothes like crop tops but im not comfortable with my body just yet ! so i guess my fashion style is like. Comfortable 

when were you born: February 21st! 

how old are you:  :/ 

do you have any siblings: Two older brothers! They’re 25 and 29. 

what school/college do you go to: I’m hoping to go to UVIC or  a  university in Ontario 

what kind of student are you: I procrastinate, get exhausted and miss weeks of school, but still manage to pass just because i’m friendly with all the teachers I guess. 

what are your favorite subjects: I’m a social studies bitch 

what are your favorite movies:  I love animated movies, or comedy/love stories! 

what are your pastimes: I play lots of videogames!! 

do you have many regrets:  my last relationship lol 

what is your dream job: A school counsellor! I really think that school systems don’t really have the right people working in their schools to help guide students and have presentable personalities that kids want to talk to. I personally had very intimidating Counsellors, or ones that just didn’t know what they’re talking about. I’d like to change that!! 

would you like to get married: Yes. I just think it’d be Neat

do you want kids? how many if so: I would like to adopt some older kids in the future

how many countries have you visited: none :(

what was your scariest dream:  I don’t have just one dream but I have a lot of recurring “Evil demon at the foot of my bed” dreams 

do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other: ruh roh 

put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping the first 15 songs:  Yeet 

1) Moonlight Shadow - Italobrothers

2) For reasons unknown - The killers 

3) Emperor's New Clothes - Panic! at the disco

4) 6PM in new york - Drake 

5) A dustland fairytale - The killers (My favourite song ever! ) 

6) Hold Slow - Labs

7) Miss Atomic Bomb - The killers (I’m telling u now that I have a lot of the killers music ) 

8) Flesh and Bone - The killers 

9) Hold on, We’re going home - Drake ft Majid Jordan

10) Sex Yeah - Marina and the Diamonds 

11) Doubt - Shallou 

12) Midnight city - M83

13) No Place Like Home -  Marianas trench 

14) Miss you - James Hersey 

15) (i just) died in your arms - Cutting crew 

I tag all my mutual’s to do this. you know who you are 

[peachteaprophet]

@aperfectexampleofsarcasm had to go and tag me in a gtkm thing SO i guess I’ll do that instead of sleeping. I like doing shit like this :’’)

and I’ll tag @ratfuxk @relativelyjilly and @dyerink and that’s. all I’ve got

how tall are you: I tell everyone I’m 5′11″ but honestly? I think I’m 5′9″?? I’ve got absurdly long legs (at a lil over 3 feet) so it gives me the illusion of being taller

what color are your eyes: uhhhhh, blue? but also a bit green in the right light? once they were very gray and i had a five minute identity crisis

do you wear contacts and/or glasses: according to the optometrist, yes? but one, they’re just reading glasses and two, I forget that I own them so I won’t wear them until the migraines get too bad cause I’m stupid

do you wear braces: not anymore, thank fuck!! I have a permanent retainer along the back of my bottom teeth, though. 

what’s your fashion style: occasionally feminine, mostly fuckboy? I dress in a manner that makes it hard to determine my gender/sexuality/age?? most of my shirts used to belong to my dad and I’ll wear skinny jeans in 110+ degree Fahrenheit weather. also i only own one pair of tennis shoes that i rarely wear because 90% of the time it’s black combat boots. and one pair of cowboy boots

when were you born: september 22, 1999! on that day in history the US spy Nathan Hale was hanged by the British in 1776 :D

how old are you: 18 but i feel like a 1950s housewife high on drugs. that’s not an age but like. yknoww

do you have any siblings: I have one half-sister that I know, then two other half-siblings that I’ve never met

what school/college do you go to: no school or college for this idiot, I’m disappointing everyone I know and avoiding school for as long as I possibly can

what kind of student are you: I was the sort that never did any work until the last minute and half the time I found ways to convince other people to do a lot of it for me. I was never dumb, and I excelled fairly well in history/english/theatre, but like math and science shit? I was really bad at it, so I’d work my way around that by befriending the nerds. I also refused to read a lot of books for english throughout high school simply because they were all shit but i also never read the cliff’s notes so to be honest? i have no idea how i passed. i’m a fast typer so in some classes when the teacher was asking questions i’d already have answers and shit queue’d up? all the teachers liked me but the asshole teachers? I was their Favorite because I, too, am a sarcastic little shit like them. (specifically my government teacher, advanced english teacher, and that final theatre teacher i had)

what are your favorite subjects: psychology, government and economics, theatre, english, almost any home econ class, and i already said theatre but like. ESPECIALLY theatre.

what are your favorite movies: The Labyrinth, Jumanji, Stardust, Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas, Hercules, Deadpool, Burlesque, Silent Hill, Grease, and I don’t know if I’d consider it a favorite but I watched Leap! today, twice, and cried both times so. 

what are your pastimes: reading, writing (fiction and poetry), listening to an absurd number of podcasts, daydreaming, cleaning, drawing eyes on everything, drinking coffee, uhhhhhh. spinning really fast until the circles until the world is still a blur even when i’m standing still.

do you have many regrets: if there’s any one person out there that has no regrets, they’re probably a shitty 2D excuse of a person. 

what is your dream job: I want to be a NYT bestselling author, that’s the job I want more than anything in the world, but there are a few other things that all equally come a close second so.

I want to get my doctorate in psychology, and I wanna work with either criminals or teenagers.

I want to make either short films or podcasts? I haven’t decided yet, but I’m too visual of a person to not take advantage of at least one of those.

I want to do more with theatre. I don’t think acting is something I could do, at least not anytime soon, but. I have so many stories to tell and, like with the films/podcasts, I’d love to just do one thing onstage. I love set building and the idea of choreographing every move to mean something it just. i love theatre

and, lastly, I want to just travel. I think I’d do this with any of these jobs, but I wanna go everywhere I can possibly go

would you like to get married: I mean in theory, yes? but I’ve never been provided with very good examples of healthy marriages so I don’t think that’s something I’ll be comfortable with for. a long time. BUT THAT BEING SAID, weddings? I love the idea. If I could just have a wedding without the actual marriage that’d be fantastic. I’ve been planning it out for so long I just. ignored the part where I needed a partner (basically I just wanna wear a fancy ass dress and be adored and eat cake??)

do you want kids? if so how many: I adamantly refuse to give birth to any living, sentient thing. My family doesn’t seem to grasp this but I hhhhhate the idea of giving birth. It absolutely horrifies me, and also? I just don’t like small children. I’ve got the patience of a hand grenade when it comes to small kids cause like. they can’t read?? I literally do not remember how the fuck i learned how to read one day i was illiterate and then suddenly i had a college reading level in third grade???? i can’t handle kids they’re just so. egh. BUT I’m okay with older kids? and also they’re the ones less likely to be adopted from the foster system so like. I wouldn’t mind, one day when I’m older, fostering older kids? 

how many countries have you visited: I have not left Texas/Oklahoma since I was seven years old. someone please save me

what was your scariest dream: oh where do I start?

the dream where the rocking horse flies from Alice in Wonderland ripped the skin from my face? (I was five)

the one where I watched three witches perform an autopsy on my mom? (I was five)

the one where I continued to dig a bloody gouge into the side of my face and no one bothered to question it? (recent dream!)

I have been visited infrequently by a very large ant since I was about six?? but these were less dreams and more vivid hallucinations? the first time it happened i woke up in the middle of the night and watched this ant crawl across my body? and then another time in broad daylight i watched it crawl through a large dollhouse like it lived there? but it left when my friend returned?? 

do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other: i don’t know? i mean i guess not, not really? it’s weird and complicated, but it’s all good!! complicated is my middle name :’’)

put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping the first 15 songs: i have like a million playlists so I’ll just put the first song of each!

"When You Loved Me Least” by Michl

“Fine!” by Mal Blum

“Never Wanted to Dance” by Mindless Self Indulgence

“More Than Survive” from Be More Chill

“Girls” by Marina and the Diamonds

“All I Want” by Kodaline

“Traveling Song” by Ryn Weaver

“The End of All Things” by PATD

“Neptune” by Sleeping At Last

“Maps” by Keaton Henson

“Smother” by Daughter

“Fear of the Water” by SYML

“warm glow” by Hippo Campus

“Sleepover” by Hayley Kiyoko

“Whoa Whoa Whoa” by Watsky 

[whimsicmimic]

the evolution of tobis face 2017 The most important thing is i got an itty bitty cat around april and now hes a 13 pound monster and i love him. i was tagged by @violetsapphos and ill tag uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh @bureau-of-benevolence @aperfectexampleofsarcasm @aggressivelyqueerdisaster @darerarara because i dont know who else to tag :')

[pendragonshoard]

Asdfghjkl

Okokok callout post for @aperfectexampleofsarcasm bc my eye keeps catching the tags on all your reblogs and I'm wheezing oh my god

[alpacalmond]

PASS THE HAPPY ALONG! when you get this, reply with five things that make you happy and pass along to ten nice people ❤️

nerd

[windyvalleyzone]

tagged by @the-feeling-is-mutual!! thanks i lose doing these!!!! rules: tag some people @jack-bauer-afarmerfromillinois @jack-masterofnone @littleladyshady @memebuster5000 @sourcandeyes @maddieide @aperfectexampleofsarcasm

answer 11 questions and then pose 11 more for the next person!

their questions:

1. Is there a pet you always wanted as a kid? I always had the pet I wanted. He was a rag doll cat named Jesse and he was my best friend for 13 years.

2. What is your opinion on musicals? Great. they need professionally, legally made recordings. Theres a LOT of people who would buy these, so what’s the deal???

3. memes. good or evil? what is your favorite? there are no evil memes, only evil memers. depending on the user, a meme can be used for good OR evil, but by themselves they only hold raw power waiting to be utilized. 

4. there are three doors. one that opens onto a field of lettuce, another that opens onto a room of really comfortable blankets and pillows, and a third that opens onto a room full of books, stacks and shelves, all the way to the ceiling. it might just be the library of alexandria. pick one. is this a real question??? the books. cmon.

5. pick an animal. give them a treat. kittie. tuna.

6. blondies or brownies? is this asking if i prefer women with blonde or brown hair?? because theres no other way i can take this. i dont really have a preference

7. was jean valjean straight? whom? 

8. what numbers are Bad Numbers? seven. you know why.

9. plays or musicals? musicals

10. what is a word that just emanates dark energy? antidisestablishmentarianism 

11. what city is less glamorous and *sparkly* than tourists think? i’m talking pizza rat nyc. new donk city

heres some questions of my own! 1. if you could have your ashes made into any vinyl album, which would it be?

2. do you believe in the oxford comma?

3. how many windows in your house?

4. favorite pizza toppings? (if you don’t like pizza take a moment to contemplate how much a sad person you are before continuing)

5. dream car?

6. favorite shoes?

7. do you know team starkid? you don’t? wow.

8. have you ever read something so stupid on this website that it almost made you go amish? tell us about it.

9 whats your social security number?

10. you’re on death row. what’s your last meal?

11. WHAT TEAM

[windyvalleyzone]

@aperfectexampleofsarcasm @godtierluigi

That person who followed you since you were a newbie and up to now, and they're still following you.

[mithryl-ninja]

is this cheating? whoops. i tag uhh... @littleladylulub @princessrobocop and @aperfectexampleofsarcasm

[uiyutrentasei]

so @aperfectexampleofsarcasm tagged me!!! this year was wild and SO much is still happening and im glad i managed to leave behind some of the negativity that was really fucking me up lately

and i was really lucky to find people who could work that out with me too like not to be gay but im so happy i have my friends and i love them so much? im a ufcking sentimental bitch but im so grateful they were there to actually talk to me like they did (heart emojis)

i hope im gonna have some pics with my internet buddies for next years post................. yall better be fucking ready

ill get to tagging these assholes,,, @alpacalmond (i double dare you bitch) @hal-strider @taggedgore (i will also accept pictures of a child elijah wood because thats what i call you and picture you as at this point) @nomoreheroes and  @leggomynyeggo (you have to do this now)

[hal-strider]

I was tagged by @uiyutrentasei and @aperfectexampleofsarcasm to do the six selfies tag or whatever!! 

2017 has been suck a wild ass ride. It’s been the best year and the worst, but I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished and all the new amazing friends I’ve made 💝💖 

 I tag: @alpacalmond @mithryl-ninja @kittyrockertime @mimsiical @jakequirks