#anyways. bites chews tears rips shreds kills

[ev1lde4d]

do you know how devastating it is for me to have the shark themed idol quickly start becoming one of my least favorites just because of her fanbase. do you. do you

[ivyfluoresce]

YOOO...... You're so right, more episodes in S4 is probably a controversial idea, but it could've worked! I'm rewatching it rn and I just wish so bad that they had taken the time to make some of these characters more "relatable" (in the sense that we can connect to or at least understand their motivations past surface level, whether we agree w them or not -- Ray Stussy and Bear Gerhardt are good examples) bc the emotional stakes here are… Oof. I completely agree with you abt them killing people off toward the end. Obv Fargo can make absurd deaths work (RIP Ray Stussy), but I rolled my eyes hard at Gaetano's thing. He deserved way more thought than that for carrying so much of the season's tension. Re: biting off more than they could chew, luckily S4 has some great fics filling in the blanks and giving these characters the time they deserve <3

Anyway… You can tell how much Iove an imperfect piece of media by how badly I tear it to shreds. 💔 S4 will be the death of me.

Why is season four of Fargo so underrated I’m gonna scream you guys are so fucking boring.

[kitty0boy]

Uh ohhh, back again. So this time it’s, you guessed it, Marichat. I will write other love square fics in the future but for now I must feed my Marichat starved ass. As always, Adrien is 18, Marinette is 17, and this time, Chat pays Marinette a visit, while drunk. Nothing smutty just dumb Chat Noir. And I checked, the drinking age in France is actually 16 so this is very much legal. Enjoy!

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Adrien was bored, so incredibly bored in his absolutely massive room. Despite having a rock wall, a piano, an arcade machine, a Foseball table, a wide screen television, a computer, and an entire wall full of CDs, Adrien was bored. He felt bad that he didn’t appreciate all he had, but the simple fact is that he would give all of it away in a heartbeat, and you know what? Maybe he should. There are thousands of kids in Paris that would kill to have a fraction of all he had. And he was rich anyways so he could just buy something else. He sighed and Plagg lazily rolled over on his desk. “Are you as bored as I am?” His Kwami asked. “Yup.” He replied. What to do what to do. “You know Plagg, I kind of feel like pissing off my father right now.” He said nonchalant. “Who are you and what have you done with Adrien?” Plagg teased, earning a giggle from his wielder. Over the years Plagg seemed to rub off on him. He was still a hundred times more responsible than Plagg but he wasn’t a stick in the mud when it came to rules. He wasn’t afraid to piss of Gabriel or disappoint him anymore, he didn’t spend much time with him anyways. “Well then,” Plagg said, floating up “let’s see what we can find.”

————-

Marinette had finally figured out a routine when it comes to being the guardian. The Kwamis were allowed out of the miracle box for two hours everyday. She would set up snacks, board games, arts and crafts and more to keep them entertained. In exchange, they would stay quiet so that people wouldn’t be worried for her, plus it helped to not have the Kwamis ripping her room to shreds. Their time out of the miracle box had just ended. She had already cleaned up the board games and brought the plates down stairs. She was about to change into her pjs when something poked through her window. It was a black glove. She squealed and tried to quickly pull her shirt back on before he could come in. “Chat Noir! What did I say about knocking?” She quickly stuffed the miracle box into her closet before approaching the window. He didn’t climb in right away though, instead he dangled from the window sill. She poked her head out and made eye contact with him.

“Look Marinette, now I’m the damsel I’m distress, waiting for my hero to save me.” He slurred his words a little which was odd. Playing along she grabbed him by the arms and pulled him up through her window. Instead of standing and climbing through the window. He dragged himself in and slumped to the floor with his back against the carpet. “You know, you’re strong for a little person.” He giggled. “Ok kitty, get up.” He followed orders and stood, but he swayed slightly and laughed more when she held him steady. He reached up and, booped her. What? She knew he was a dork but he never usually acted like this. Then the faint scent of expensive wine hit her nose. “Chat are you drunk?” He crossed his arms infront of him. “No I’m not, I’m Chat Noir.” He laughed at his own dad joke. “Yeah ok, you’re drunk.” She sighed and rubbed her temple. “Just wait here a minute.”

She went downstairs and got a glass of water and some croissants for him to snack on. She opened the trap door, “Ok kitty, time for you to sober up.” She looked at him, still standing in the same place she had left him. What a goof.

“Come sit Chat, we can watch a movie while you eat.” He obeyed and collapsed dramatically onto the chaise lounge. “Can I get cuddles Marinette, your knight in shining armour is touch starved, only the cuddles of his *hic* purrincess can save him from this curse.” She giggled, “Ok, but after you eat first.” He sat bolt upright and seemed to regret that decision because he slumped and collapsed again. She laughed and he pouted, “Chat oh my god, you don’t have to rush, I’m not leaving.” He smiled clumsily, was it even possible to smile clumsily? He sat up in slow motion, no he actually tried to move in slow motion before slowly reaching out and grabbing a croissant. “Chat you’re going to kill me,” she laughed “you don’t have to move in slow motion, you can eat at a normal pace.” Somehow, he didn’t understand the concept of normal because he shoved the whole croissant into his mouth, chewed, and swallowed. ‘How was that even possible?’ she thought, did he have power she didn’t know about? Like stretchy mouth or something? She stared at him dumbly as he inhaled another croissant. “Ok kitty, this time we’re going to take bites.” She picked up a croissant and took a bite out of it, “Like this see, bites.” It was like teaching a toddler, she had done it in the past but said toddler wasn’t drunk and 6 feet tall. Chat didn’t grab the last croissant on the plate, instead he took a regular sized bite of the croissant in Marinette’s hand, chewed and swallowed. She laughed again, he was such a dork. She decided that it would just be easier to let him eat the croissant like that so she fed him the rest and adjusted her computer on the desk so it was facing them. She handed Chat the remote. “Ok kitty, you pick what movie you wanna watch and I’ll be right back ok? Don’t go anywhere.” He gave a toothy grin before sliding to the ground and sitting against the chaise lounge. She sighed smiling and walked towards her bathroom to change and get ready for bed.

When she walked back in, Chat wasn’t scrolling through movie options or even sitting up right. He was lying, on the ground starring blankly at her ceiling with the song “Despacito” playing from his baton. She walked over to him and kneeled by his face, “Chat Noir what are you do-?” He placed a finger on her lips and slurred out a “Shhhhh.” Before a tear rolled down his cheek, she looked at him, mixed between trying not to laugh and concerned. “I’m in my feels princess.” He said before deeply inhaling. “DESPACI-“ her hand slapped over his mouth before she rested her head on his chest and wheezed out a laugh. “Chat oh my fucking god.” She said between giggles “You have to keep quiet, my parents would kill me if they found out you were here, and drunk no less.” He reached up and put his hand on top of her hand that was currently silencing him, instead of pulling it off, he kissed it and smiled at her. Her face turned beet red as she stared at him. That is until he licked her hand. She pulled her hand away and wiped it on her shirt. “Chat!” She exclaimed, he brought his hands behind his head and smirked at her, “Who’s the loud one now little lady?” She blushed again, if it wasn’t for the fact that he just licked her, she might have stammered too. Instead she just shook her head, “Come on Chat, let’s watch a movie.” His eyes lit up and he stood, jumping up and down, “Do I get cuddles now?” His tail swished behind him. Was he a dog or a cat? She laughed and agreed before the pair settled on the chaise.

————————

The sun was beaming on his face when he woke up. He was surprised he didn’t have a headache. He opened his eyes and the first thing he saw, was pink. Lots and lots of pink. His eyes shot open and looked around before landing on a mop of Raven hair. Marinette was cuddled up to him, her arms encircling his torso while her head rested on one half of his chest, one of her legs crossed over his. ‘Oh no, oh shit shit shit.’ He gulped before slowly moving his hand down her back, oh thank god, she had clothes on. He smiled down at her and soon, she blinked up at him. “Good morning Marinette.” He said, his voice still heavy with sleep. “Ah so you’re sober I see, don’t worry, nothing happened.” She said reassuringly. He ran a hand down his face, a gloves hand. Ah so he came here as Chat Noir. “Do you remember anything?” He shook his head and she filled him in. “Well I’m glad I didn’t do anything stupid.” He laughed, “Nope it was more like babysitting an overgrown toddler.” She laughed, he smiled. “I’m surprised you don’t have a headache.” She said, “It’s probably the suit, it will probably get worse when I take to suit off.” He made to leave but Marinette held him down. “Nope, I had to babysit you all night, I request cuddles as payment.” He sighed before rolling onto his side and nuzzling his face into her neck. “Fine by me purrincess.”

He was right, his head nearly split open from the hangover, but it was all worth it.

—————————————

Thanks for reading!

[hazbincalifornia]

Midnight Snack

Chapter 25: Blitzo gets peckish.

Warnings: As always, mpreg, and implied animal death. Also stuffing if that needs a tag I guess, and BABY VIOLENCE. (Violence committed by a baby, not against a baby.)

Likes, replies, and reblogs are all appreciated, both here and on ao3!

Ao3 link

Blitzo’s stomach gurgled, and his arms tightened around the pillow that he was hugging to his chest. A fussy, hungry stomach wouldn’t have necessarily been a problem, except for the fact that it had been doing it for the past hour, and he was just about ready to tear it right out of his skin and rip it in half. Acid sloshed around audibly in his empty gut- or maybe the freeloader wanted more room and was just squashing the organ down so much that it had resorted to griping as loudly as it could. Relatable fuckin’ content right there.

Dinner had been two burgers and fries smothered in hot sauce and mayo from the grease trap down the road, which was more than enough to coast through until breakfast. Besides, he’d be damned if the kid was going to make him deal with the grocery store any more than he had to in this condition. No, he was staying right where he was, especially considering he’d been denied any sleep last night. One day low on sleep was manageable with reduced caffeine, two would suck satan’s left tit.

“C’mon, that was enough and you know it, I don’t want you ruining my figure any more than you already have,” he grumbled as the muscles clenched around his stomach, wringing it out like a sponge and drawing a pitiful whine out of his throat. “I’m not gonna just- give in and give you whatever you want, daddy’s gotta do him sometimes and I’m not letting you empty out the fridge. I ate enough, siphon blood outta my system like a normal leech does. I’ve got plenty of that.”

The reply was another gurgling groan and a hard clench as Blitzo’s empty stomach demanded sustenance, this time loud enough to make his middle vibrate even through the pounds of baby. He stuffed the pillow over his mouth, drool leaking down the case and over his chin as he forced out a scream.

He had to take a few seconds to pant before setting a hand on the side of his stomach, fingers drumming. “This is a battle of wills, and I am not letting you win. Your baby-daddy already started all this shit, so I’m just going to treat you the same as him- by ignoring you as long as feasibly possible until you decide to pop up and make everything difficult. Sound good? Yeah, sounds perfect.” There was a nudge from inside and Blitzo nodded in satisfaction at the apparent agreement, settling back down on the bed. He’d gone to sleep hungry plenty of times before, the baby gut notwithstanding, he just had to muscle through this for the next few-

There was no time to muffle the next scream as a sudden pinching pain went from ‘noticeable’ to ‘holy shit who’s tearing up my guts with a chainsaw?’, and there was a thud and a shuffling of feet before Loona started pounding on the door.

“You having a heart attack in there or something?”

Blitzo clutched at his stomach, wheezing as he was clawed apart from the inside out. “N-no!”

“Look, if you die, I’m on the hook for the rent.” Still, there was a semi-worried vibrato to her voice, and he swallowed down the coppery taste flooding up with the saliva to his mouth.

“I’m- fINE-!” His voice pitched up at another pinch-turned-horrorshow and his claws dug all the way through the pillow, stuffing spilling out like viscera.

“What the fuck are you doing in there?” The doorknob jiggled. Where was a portable x-ray when you needed one? Or ultrasound, or whatever the fuck you used to look at a baby that was trying to kill him before it even got out yet. What kind of horrible mouth or claws must it have- oh, fucking hell, Stolas had said something about his kid having a razor-sharp beak from birth, hadn’t he?

“Okay, I’m coming in.” Loona eased the door open, already in her pajamas and clutching a package of opened peanut butter crackers tightly enough that crumbs were sticking to her fingers. “You look like shit.”

“I feel like shit, so good-” Sharp inhale for breath, let it out- “-To know that I’m all on the same page.”

She dropped down on the bed with a metallic creak. “What’d the kid do now?”

“It feels like they’re biting me again, but w-worse- fuck!” Another nip, this one dragging a line on the inside of the womb like they were drift racing in there. Wait, dragging? He swallowed down more coppery bile. “Okay, fine, fine, sheesh, I’ll fuckin’ eat something, happy you little shithead?”

Loona raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t say anything.”

Blitzo shoved himself up off the bed to wobbly knees. “Junior’s gotten real bold, and instead of just sucking up the meat I’m eating for them like a good little lump, they decided to put me on the menu- ow, fuck, I’m going, keep your baby-tits on!”

“Babies don’t have tits, Blitzo.”

“They do if I say they do, sweetie.” Blitzo ruffled Loona’s fur between her ears as he waddled across the room, pausing next to the TV to take a breath.

Loona raised an eyebrow. “Do you need me to bring you something? I don’t want you passing out in the middle of the apartment and tripping over you tomorrow morning.”  In response, Blitzo just waved a dismissive hand.

“I can handle walking across two rooms, Loonie.” The active chewing had paused for the moment, but whatever they’d shredded in there was still shredded, and he’d rather not make it any worse- he had work tomorrow, dammit.

The fridge bathed him in a sickly, hospital-like glow as he tugged it open, and drool immediately started leaking from his mouth as the smells of half-forgotten, time-ripened leftovers hit him. A small mouse with four red eyes leaped up from the floor when he opened the door, burrowing into a box of takeout on the bottom shelf that Loona must have gotten when he’d been at Stolas’s place. His tongue snapped out automatically, snatching its furry body up and slurping up the tail between his lips before swallowing, and it took a second for his brain to load enough to register- after it slid down his throat.

Holy shit, did he just…? It squirmed a little as it descended, little hairs stuck in his teeth, and his fingers tightened on the side of his stomach before he reached for the box it had been after to wash out the aftertaste.

Everything after that was a bit of a blur, although he did retain enough sense of mind to avoid the six-pack of cheap beer in the back that still had four cans on it. Better to not risk puking all of this up or ruining the kid any more than they already were. Carbs, meat, a few wilted veggies that Moxxie had pawned off on him, sweet, sour, cold chili and whole untoasted bagels- it didn’t really matter what it was as long as it was at least mostly edible (he was pretty sure he swallowed a wrapper at some point), he just needed it inside of him now. Smothering everything in hot sauce and salsa and mustard made it more palatable anyway, especially the ice cream. The kid didn’t start taking chunks out of him again, at least, so he must have been doing something right. More and more of the white fridge walls became visible as the floor around him littered with containers, and his stomach grew tighter before he finally slumped back against the nearby counter with a groan. His legs sprawled out on the cool tile, both hands now stained with a mixture of about five kinds of leftovers, and he cradled his stomach after muffling a burp.

“Are you happy now, you needy little shit?”

Blitzo didn’t really expect a reply and almost didn’t hear it over the churning gurgles of digestion, but a soft ‘eee’ of a hoot, more a whisper-screech than anything, murmured from his midsection. He stared down at it, the warmth of his full stomach counteracted by ice dripping down his back.

“Oh, of course you sound just like him.” His claws dragged along the sensitive, itchy-while-stretched skin before the protection spell sprung up and pushed the fingers away. It only let him touch his own stupid body when he laid his palm flat. “Sure, it’s cute now when it's all little and squeaky, but you’d better not be as entitled as he is, alright? Or as you are now, since I’ve gotta do everything for you until you’re born. Considering you just settled right down in there without even asking in the first place, I doubt it. Rude.”

There were no more noises other than his stomach grumbling about going from empty to full so quickly, and he stayed slumped against the cabinet for long enough to let some of it digest. He must have been more tired than he thought, because he swore that he already looked bigger than he’d been when he’d finished binging. Maybe it started swelling in a bad reaction from whatever fucked-up food cocktail he'd accidentally made.

When he didn’t feel quite so much like a boulder had gotten stuffed inside his guts, it took three tries to haul his ass off the tile and drag himself back to bed, huffing like a cop running for the last doughnut in the process.

The ice had crept from his spine to the rest of his bones and muscles as he tugged the blanket tight around himself, but at least the churning food kept his stomach warm, and he passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

[hartigays]

17. “Because I love you!”

17. “Because I love you!”

“what the fuck were you thinking?”

steve bristles at billy’s tone, groaning pitifully in lieu of a response. his lower leg is torn to hell, and he hisses in pain when billy peels off more of the shredded fabric of his jeans from the gaping wounds covering his calf.

“going out there on your own,” billy mutters, his brows furrowed in concentration. there’s the barest hint of anger in his eyes, and it has steve’s cheeks burning in shame. “did you smoke fuckin’ crack for breakfast? i mean, seriously. the fuck were you goddamn thinking?”

steve just lets his head fall back against the couch, throwing an arm over his face. “maybe save tearing me a new asshole for when i’m not bleeding to death? thanks.”

“can’t help it that you’re a fuckin’ idiot,” billy tells him.

it’s then that billy does it, tearing away the remnants of steve’s pants leg with one final tug. steve can’t help but yelp in pain, biting down on his fist.

he hadn’t intended to go out and get attacked by a fucking demo-dog. he just wanted to do a short sweep. hop did put steve in charge of his cabin for the week, after all. it’s the least he could do. steve never thought there’d actually be anything out there. not when things have been this quiet, this peaceful, in recent months.

if steve had thought there was any immediate danger, he never would’ve gone out alone.

“what the fuck were you doing out in the woods anyway?” steve asks, his voice somewhat strangled as billy continues to staunch the blood spilling from his leg.

“the chief said you’d be out here,” billy explains, like it should be obvious. “brought you some food since lord fuckin’ knows you can’t cook.”

steve can’t help the way that knowledge makes his stomach flip-flop. because either billy had been asking around about where steve had run off to, or the chief had let it slip and billy took it upon himself to come out here to check up on him.

a quiet voice in his mind whispers that billy cares, and the butterflies suddenly fluttering around in steve’s stomach start going so crazy that it feels like they’re bound to burst right out of him.

“i don’t see any food,” steve says, finally taking a moment to look around hopper and el’s cluttered living space. trying to focus on the situation at hand rather than the messy feelings he may or may not have for another boy.

billy pauses his patch-job, giving steve a pointed look. “yeah, cause i dropped the shit. saving your dumbass.”

steve winces, scratching his head sheepishly. “oh. right. sorry about that.”

they both fall silent, billy working on steve’s leg, and steve trying not to be a total pussy by breaking down into tears. but the shit fucking hurts - the dog had ripped his lower leg to shreds, and steve is pretty sure there’s still teeth embedded in some of the wounds.

billy confirms that suspicion when he says, “gonna have to get these out with tweezers. pushing antibiotics won’t do shit if you’ve still got these stuck up in there.”

he’s gesturing to a particular set of gashes on steve’s leg, and steve braves a glance, seeing the sharp edges of what can only be teeth sticking out from tissue and muscle.

“it’s gonna feel like shit,” billy continues, clearly waiting for a signal from steve before continuing.

steve tries to steel himself, gritting his teeth and clenching his fists. “just do it.”

“deep breath,” is all billy says before taking the medical-grade tweezers into his hand, and starting the process of pulling the teeth free from steve’s flesh.

for a few moments, steve keeps quiet. but the pain is too much, somehow worse than being bitten and torn up in the first place. steve starts cursing and crying out after a few short minutes, his eyes blurring with tears.

it feels like it takes a century, billy pulling out tooth after tooth, the pile beside him growing higher and higher. billy at least isn’t making fun of him for crying, instead just reminding him to breathe and telling him every now and then that it’s almost over.

the next time billy says it, that they’re almost done, steve grits his teeth, blowing the air out of his nose harshly. “would you quit fucking saying that? jesus christ, you’ve been at it for 20 fucking minutes. we’re not almost done and you know it.”

billy just sits back on his heels, blinking up at him and looking wholly unimpressed. “that was the last one. quit fuckin’ whining.”

then, billy’s covering steve’s calf with a clean, rubbing alcohol-soaked cloth, and steve can’t help the way his leg kicks or the way he screams. it burns like hellfire, and steve can feel the tears leaving warm, salty tracks on his skin as they run down his cheeks.

“hey, you’re okay, you’re fine,” billy shushes him, and steve barely registers the fact that he’s now squeezing one of steve’s hands. “worst part is over. like ripping off a bandaid.”

“is it bad that all of this has felt like the worst part?” steve asks through gritted teeth, squeezing his eyes shut as billy starts to roll on the gauze and bandages.

a moment later, billy sits up, releasing steve’s leg from his grip. “done. you did good, c’mon. let’s get you some pants that haven’t been half-chewed off.”

“don’t think i can walk right now,” steve says honestly, giving billy his best puppy dog eyes. “could you bring me the pair of sweats from my bag?”

billy rolls his eyes, but doesn’t say anything, just heads into the back room like he’s been here a million times before to get steve’s belongings. he returns with steve’s favorite pair of sweatpants, kneeling down and helping him out of his torn-up jeans.

“wouldn’t have to act like your fuckin’ mom if you hadn’t been running around outside alone like an idiot,” billy grumbles as he tugs steve’s sweatpants up over his hips, carefully minding his injured leg.

“i didn’t think there’d be anything out there,” steve says, his own irritation starting to fester. “just wanted to do a quick perimeter check before locking up.”

“you should’ve waited.”

“waited for what?” steve snaps, throwing his hands up. “it’s not like i fucking knew you were coming.”

“it doesn’t matter,” billy argues, “you know better. because shit like this happens. you’re fuckin’ smarter than that, harrington, jesus.”

steve gives him an incredulous look, trying and failing to quell his mounting frustration. “why the fuck do you care? why are you even here in the first place? ‘s not like i asked you to come. i don’t need protecting.”

“because i love you!” billy blurts, whirling around to level steve with a wild-eyed stare. “i don’t need you going around getting killed just because you want to play the big hero or some shit. and you clearly do need fuckin’ protection, because look at you! you could’ve died!”

the silence hangs heavy between them when billy finishes, his chest rising and falling rapidly. steve feels like he’s been slapped, but not entirely in a bad way, billy’s words ringing in his ears.

“you... did you just say you love me?” steve finally asks, looking at billy with something akin to wonder.

“i - no. that’s not... i didn’t mean it like that,” billy rushes to say, his cheeks burning bright red. he’s staring at something above steve’s head, refusing to meet his eyes.

steve just keeps watching him, his heart feeling like it’s about to beat right out of his chest and plop onto the floor. “what if - what if i said i wanted you to mean it like that?”

billy looks at him sharply. “what?”

only hesitating for a moment, steve takes a deep breath, patting the spot on the couch beside him, chewing on his lip. “i want you to sit here. and i want you to tell me again.”

a long stretch of silence. then, billy’s slowly walking towards the couch, seating himself next to steve. he’s rigid as a board, looking like he’s bound to bolt at any second.

“can you tell me again?” steve asks, his voice soft.

billy glances at steve, looking uncertain. “i... love you.”

and this feels different than all the other times steve has been told he’s loved. it’s different than all the other times steve’s told someone they’re loved. because billy isn’t soft and feminine and all the things steve is used to. but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s everything that steve wants, the realization suddenly clear as day.

so steve makes the first move, leaning in and sealing their lips together with a soft sigh. billy squeaks in surprise before melting into the kiss, one hand coming to rest against steve’s cheek.

it’s not like any kiss steve has ever experienced. billy is sturdy and solid beneath his hands, all broad shoulders and toned muscles, and his stubble scrapes across the delicate skin of steve’s face as they kiss. but steve chases the feeling, something warm and hot blossoming in his stomach.

steve thinks he could do this forever, could hold and kiss billy just like this all the time. except maybe minus the injured leg. he could do without the underlying throb, the only thing distracting him from the heat of the kiss and the softness of billy’s lips moving with his easily. like they belong together.

“i love you too,” steve says easily when billy pulls back to breathe. he presses a gentle kiss to billy’s cheek, smiling against his skin. “maybe a little too much sometimes.”

“you could never be too much,” is all billy says.

billy kisses steve this time, soft and sugary sweet and with enough purpose to make steve’s toes curl.

“and you know, love me all you want. you’re still an idiot, harrington.”

steve just tosses his head back, laughing loud and unabashed. because yeah, he is, but it’s okay.

billy still loves him anyway.

[gustafsnightangel]

Shattered Lives Ch 15 Pt 2

“Is she going to be ok?” He asked and the twins looked at him too.

“We’ll make sure she’s ok. Team work right?” He smiled, he was so not equipped to handle this. He just hoped he wasn’t fucking things up as he went, talk about flying by the seat of your pants.

She barely stirred when he moved seats, bundling her closer he relaxed back. He let the boys play, they needed a distraction now, a little down time of their own. Resting his head back he felt himself slip into sleep and there was nothing he could do to stop it, he was emotionally exhausted.

The knock at the door snapped him awake though. Instantly alert like his subconscious knew there were four kids to watch out for and he was the responsible adult. Brendan answered it and brought the pizza in. Gustaf had crashed out for at least two hours and Sildie was still out cold. Exhaustion had taken her under, hard.

He ate with her in his arms and watched the kids race each other on Mario Cart. Laughing quietly with them, keeping spirits high on a day where it was easy for them to slip into the darkness and stay there. She shifted and opened her eyes.

“That smells really good.” She said groggily.

“Good thing I got one for you to then.” He smiled at her. Those eyes were clearer now which put him at ease.

“Feeling better?” He asked carefully.

“Much, still tired.” She huffed and sat up so she could pinch a bite of his before eating her half cold pizza.

“Early to bed, more sleep will be good for you.” He kissed her softly.

She nodded. She was out of words, her throat sore from screaming, and her body ached.

She ate three slices and he had to be happy with that, and she was warm now too. Climbing off him she went to the bathroom and collapsed on the bed when she came out. She knew she should tend to the kids but the exhaustion was too great and felt guilty for dumping it all on Gustaf. She curled up on the bed just wanting sleep to take her under again, it did without fail.

That was how he found her a little while later when he put Lily to bed. Smiling he settled Lily and then undressed Sildie. She was out cold, deep restful sleep had claimed her and he hoped it would last all night. He gently pulled the covers from under her and snuggled her in, naked and warm.

He got the kids to bed, the twins talking to him about both their parents and another round of tears. They needed their time to be heard too and it warmed him that they felt comfortable with him to do that.

“Gustaf?” Liam called as he stood at the door.

“Yeah?”

“Love you.” The twinning voice called.

“Love you both. Sleep now ok, dream big.” He half closed the door and headed to the living area closing the hall door.

“Thank you.” He said to Brendan as he sat across from the kid and a fresh pot of tea.

“I know you and Ama usually have one before bed.” He mumbled.

“I meant for today too Brendan. I couldn’t have done any of this without you. Sildie will be better after today she can start to heal.” He knew the kid wanted to get something out but he didn’t want to push him.

“You’re worried about her.” He said softly and the quiet tears streaked Brendan’s cheeks.

“I remember it more than the twins. The look on her face when she walked through the door of our old house. I knew something really bad had happened.” Brendan took a steadying breath and hesitated before speaking again. What if Gustaf told Ama he thought?

“I was so angry at her.” He said quietly as a sob escaped. “It wasn’t her fault but I was so angry at mum and dad and her.”

“That’s normal B.” Gustaf said gently, he was way out of his depth here and had to be careful.

“I didn’t want to be with her, not after what gran had said and I feel like sh...” he stopped at the swear word.

“You can say it.” Gustaf wouldn’t deny him that luxury right now. The kid was talking and that’s what mattered.

“I feel like shit for everything I said and did when we were all dumped together.”

“Brendan, I didn’t know you all then but I do now. I don’t think that bothers Sildie, she’s just happy you’re all doing ok.”

“I could see her screaming today.” He scrubbed the teas away and blew his nose.

“I think that was more between her and her brother. They were twins dude, I have no idea what that bond is like but she’s lost without him, like she’s missing a limb. That’s how she explained it anyway.” He said softly. “Anger is necessary in dealing with grief and it’s ok to be angry at your mum and dad. You can still love someone and be angry at them.” Didn’t he know that all too well he thought bitterly. “Are you still angry at Ama?” He asked quietly.

The kid shook his head vehemently. “No, not since my birthday where she chewed me out.” He said with a smirk. “Quite rightly.” He added in a mutter. “I was a prick to her.”

“Well yeah you have point there.” Gustaf said with a slight smile remembering watching the lawyer surface as she dealt with the birthday boy.

“I just feel really guilty for being an asshole to her. Everything she said or tried to do to help us I had to argue with her just because I was angry. The fighting with grandma was much worse. It made Ama really stressed.”

“Did you ever hear them arguing?” He asked carefully, dangerous ground he was treading here.

Brendan shook his head. “No she always did it at the courthouse or away from us.”

She was protecting you, shielding you from all that upheaval, the anger.”

“I still feel like an asshole.”

“Don’t Brendan, you are far from it and like I said, you’re grieving and I don’t think she even worries about that now.” He said and looked at him. “You could always talk with her about it if you think need to. You know she’d listen but I think I’m pretty safe in saying she’d hug the shit out of you and tell you it’s ok.”

Brendan nodded. “I’ll think about it.”

“Don’t stress over it anymore though ok? Let it out, let it go don’t let it eat you alive.”

“Thanks.”

“Anytime kid you know that right?” He said and gave the kid a slight smile.

Brendan nodded and smiled as he stood. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You will indeed. Go on get to bed. Ama will kill me if you’re up past your bed time.” He chuckled.

He finished his tea and thought about what the kid had just said. It hadn’t all been smooth sailing which was understandable given the situation. The situation with Dana’s family made it that much worse.

With his tea finished he cleared the table for breakfast and headed to the bedroom. He stripped and all but fell into bed, he was beat to hell emotionally. As he lay there he let the day seep from him.

Even in sleep she found him. That unmistakable scent that was her home, her comfort, her love. He felt her curl against him, that need for him to hold her. Wrapping her up in his arms he kissed her hair and breathed her in. He felt her relax and sigh as if the remainder of the days tension had finally gone from her.

“I’m so in love with you.” He murmured so softly even he could barely hear it and let the emotions well up inside him.

He cried silently for the woman in his arms, that she would heal, for the kids and hoped he could be half the father Quinn was. He cried for himself and the fear his own demons would surface and destroy the delicate relationship he had with all of them.

He held her letting his own grief pour out of him, grief for what they had endured. She’d purged her soul today yet his felt ripped to shreds at hearing her cries, her sobs, that keening of shattered lives.

He calmed eventually, his own emotions bringing him to the point of exhaustion. Sleep took him as he murmured his love for her into the night.

The apartment was quiet when he woke. It was late yet everyone had slept and slept long, even Lily. The universe must have seen the signs that they all needed it. Sildie was sprawled over him and he smiled. That curvy body, lush and tender pressed against him in all the right places.

“Woman you turn me on just by breathing.” He smirked as she stirred and curled into him more.

He kissed her temple and she stretched pressing that slender body tighter against him.

“Morning love.” He murmured as those stunning eyes fluttered open and focused, or attempted to.

“Need more sleep.” She said chuckling as he kissed her again.

“Still tired?”

“Worn out and drained.” She yawned and kissed his cheek.

“Emotional release will do that to you.”

“It feels as though I was dragged behind a team of horses for a thousand miles.” She scrubbed her hand over her face to try and clear her head a little. “I’m wrung out.”

“We’ll shoot for a better day today.” He kissed her, those lips he craved.

“Mum Mum Mum.” Lily cried softly and popped her head up over the railing of the crib.

“Hello Lily bear.” Sildie chuckled and kissed Gustaf so he’d stay in bed. “I’ll get her. You did enough of that yesterday.” She kissed him again, tongue teasing.

She rolled so her chest was resting on his and she looked down at the man she was completely in love with.

“Thank you for yesterday.” She saw him try to look away, the sentiment making him uncomfortable. Her finger trailed his jaw until his eyes eventually found hers again. She wanted to say it, those three words that she felt so deeply for him. She kissed him with such love and tenderness his head nearly exploded.

“And I’m sorry if I put you through hell. I feel slightly better for it so thank you.”

“Then that’s all that matters.” He kissed her and tangled his fingers in her hair taking it deeper.

Lily squealed as if to say hurry your ass up Mum Mum I’m dirty and not on a good feeling way, and Sildie smiled against his lips. She crawled out of bed and hastily threw on her robe. Gustaf watched her as she changed Lily and got her dressed for the day. She seemed settled, tired certainly, but calmer as if a massive weight had been lifted. He hoped the day in the snow with laughs and the chance to build memories would help.

“Tea?” She asked as she made her way to the door.

“Yes please.” He sat on the edge of the bed and watched her take Lily for breakfast.

He stood under the spray of the shower. He’d had a couple of opportunities to say those three little words just now and he hadn’t. Why was it so fucking difficult? He was in love with her, no question, no doubt. He snapped the water to cold and hissed out a breath before turning off the tap and stepping out.

“No chickening out.” He muttered to himself in the reflection of the vanity mirror. “Just fucking tell her.”

Dressing quickly he headed out to find the twins talking and Lily eating and Sildie and Brendan talking in the kitchen. As he got closer he could hear snippets of their conversation and let them be, it was along the lines of what the kid had talked with him about last night and true to form Sildie just held him while he cried his heart out.

“B look at me love.” She said quietly and she cupped his face in her hands. “We were all angry, and heartbroken and fighting. That was then, this is now. I don’t blame you for feeling like that and I’m certainly not angry at you for it. I was angry at myself and Quinn, still am in some ways. It’ll take time.” She kissed his brow and hugged him tightly. “I love you Brendan. I love all of you. Don’t ever forget that ok?”

He nodded and wiped the tears away. Seeing that Gustaf was up he went to the guy that he thought of as a bigger older brother and hugged him fiercely.

“You ok?” Gustaf asked quietly.

“You were right.” He chuckled and sat down as Gustaf smiled and nodded his head at the kid knowing exactly what he was talking about.

Sildie brought out the tea and breakfast and they all sat as a family, it still made her heart ache at the sight. Best get used to it she thought. This was the new normal, their family as blended as it could get.

His hand rested on her knee pulling her back to the present.

“Sorry, drifted off there.” She smiled at him.

“Shall I tell them where we’re going?” He asked.

“If you want. Or we could all just pile in the car and you can surprise us?” She glanced at the kids and grinned.

Turning she kissed Gustaf and the kids gagged and made noises of eww and yuck. She smiled against that clever mouth. They really were ok with it she thought. Time, time was healing them.

“All I’m going to say is dress warm and in layers.” Gustaf laughed.

“Where are we going ?” Liam asked.

“Wait and see.”

“Aww maannn.”

“It’ll be fun I promise.” He laughed.

With the boys off to shower and dress he brushed his knuckles against her cheek before kissing her.

“You’re beautiful love.” He murmured and kissed her again.

Say it, the little voice in his head said softly. Say it now.

“Only to you.” She kissed him and stood. “Can you watch Lily a moment while I get dressed?”

“Of course.”

She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him again longingly.

“I can’t wait for tomorrow.” She grinned.

“Me either.” His growl as she walked away made her pussy suddenly very wet.

Sildie packed a picnic lunch while Gustaf fielded questions as to where they were going. He could see Brendan had figured it out but held off saying anything so it was still a surprise for his brothers. He’d have to talk to Sildie about doing something nice for the kid, he’d been a real trooper yesterday and had a need to address it.

Once they had packed the car and squeezed everyone in he kissed Sildie seductively and felt her body melt against him as a tiny whimper escaped.

“Don’t tease.” She said playfully.

He winked at her over the top of the car and got in as she laughed.

There was laughter and giggles and jokes all the way to the ski resort. He’d chosen a family friendly one with lots for the kids to do. The smiles on the twin faces were all worth it. They were almost hyperventilating they were so excited.

“Stay with us boys.” Gustaf chuckled as they were in awe of the place and starting to wander away from the car.

Each twin took a hand and Sildie’s smile was wide at the sight of Gustaf and the twins bonding too. The guy melted her heart, this would be a good day. They discussed the options and settled on some tubing first. Gustaf got the boys settled in and stood with Sildie and Lily to watch.

“You want me to take Lily down?” He asked and snaked an arm around her kissing her gently.

“Sure if you want to. I don’t know how she’ll handle it.”

“We’ll be just fine.” He said as Lily let out a high pitched dad dad and he chuckled. “Back in a bit.” Just tell her he thought as he headed up the hill with Lily.

“How do I say it Lily?” He asked all smiles and kisses. “It doesn’t want to come out.” He sighed. It was the truth. Every time he went to say it it just wouldn’t. “Maybe it’s not the right time.”

He sat in the tube and got Lily settled. “Ready little lady?” He chuckled as she clapped her hands together with a dad dad.

She squealed the entire way down she was so happy. Sildie met them at the bottom and she was laughing with a huge smile of her own. He’d missed that smile, her incredible laugh.

Sildie got most of each child’s tubing on her cell phone camera and video. She would download them later so the boys could watch them. Gustaf handed Lily to Brendan and scooped Sildie up in his arms half dragging half carrying her up the hill.

“Come on it’ll be fun.” He said out of breath. He was just like a kid himself.

He pulled her into his lap and pushed them off. Say it now the tiny voice in his head said as they reached the bottom but all he could do was look at her and kiss her with a big ass smile. He put it aside as clearly he wasn’t ready, the words just wouldn’t come.

“You ok?” She asked and she helped him out of the tube.

He kissed her with all the love he couldn’t put into those three little words.

“I am now.” He growled knowing what that did to her.

He’d leave those words for later. Maybe when they were curled up tonight. She looked so happy as she set up their picnic, the boys too.

“Much better today aren’t they Lily?” She patted his cheeks with a soft dad dad as they sat down to eat.

She knew something was bothering him she just didn’t know what. It maybe just the exhaustion from yesterday catching up with him, but she saw apprehension in his eyes today that wasn’t there Monday. She just hoped she hadn’t hurt him with her outburst at the cemetery yesterday.

He was a gentle soul, tuned to her emotions so intently she knew he felt her pain, physically and emotionally. He felt the pain from the kids too. She usually shielded him from it but yesterday it flowed out of her like an avalanche.

She watched him smiling and laughing with the twins as they told him about their exploits in the tubes and racing each other with the sleds. Those crows feet she adored creasing the corners of his eyes. She wanted to tell him she loved him but knew he wasn’t ready. The pain from Ana was too raw and she couldn’t hurt him, it would destroy her.

“Lost in thought there love.” He chuckled as those slender fingers toyed with the wisps of hair that had escaped her beanie.

“Sorry.” She kissed him quickly and got busy tidying up from lunch.

“Good thoughts?” He’d been watching her and saw her zone out.

“Thoughts of you.” She said quietly and smirked at the stunned look on his face. “Yes I think about you while you’re right here.” She kissed him and laughed as the snowball from Finn had hit him square in the side of the head.

“Excuse me love, I have so business to attend to.” He grinned as a second ball from Liam hit him on the shoulder.

He kissed her hard and took off after the twins.

“Give me Lily love.” She said to Brendan. “Go on, go get him.” She laughed as the kid grinned and went to join his brothers.

With Lily in her lap, sitting in the snow she videoed the boys snowball fight. This was important for them and Gustaf, more bonding time and building memories. Lily was content at trying to copy the boys and scoop up snow for a snowball. She helped the one year old make a pile of them ready to fire at the boys as they came to sit down.

“I see Lily’s ready for another round.” Gustaf chuckled and sat in front of the child.

“Like this Lily.” And before Gustaf could brace or shield himself Sildie gently smooshed the snowball into his face. Lily giggles and clapped her hands with a dad dad.

“Oh you’ll pay for that one love.” He growled and scooped up a massive snowball three times the size of hers in his huge hands.

“Don’t you dare.” She laughed.

“Oh, I dare.” He aimed higher so it would go mostly over he head as he didn’t want too much to land on Lily and get inside her jacket. Snow and babies didn’t mix well on bare skin.

Lily squealed and scooped up snow and tried throwing it at Gustaf. Sildie took another snowball and had Lily grip her hand too before throwing it at him. He acted as if it hit him and fell over, Lily giggling again.

“Come here boys you all have to take one from Lily.” She called and the twins sat down in front of Lily. She did the same thing to them as Brendan recorded it. He’d got the one between Sildie and Gustaf too.

Handing Gustaf the phone he sat and grinned at Lily as she “threw” the snowball into his face. “Was that fun little miss?” Brendan asked and scooped up a tiny amount of snow and tossed it at her cheek. Lily squealed, that smile so wide.

“She’s so happy.” Sildie said as the twins did the same as Brendan. Lily’s snowballs hitting them too and making them fall all over the place dramatically.

Sildie let her stand and wobble. She went over to the twins where they were laying and grabbed a fist full of snow, tossing it on them and squealing. It was the most adorable thing Gustaf had ever seen. Brendan got Sildie with a snowball to the side of the face so she tackled him to the ground and shoved snow down his shirt. It was a low blow but well worth the reaction.

Once they were all out of breath they sat for a moment before Gustaf started building a snowman. The twins caught onto it first and got up to help. Pretty soon they were all helping, even Lily who was still throwing snow at everyone.

“See what you’ve started?” Sildie laughed and pointed a finger at Gustaf. “You’ve created a monster.”

He looked at Lily happily giggling and tossing tiny handfuls of snow at the boys and then running away laughing. That smile she thought, how she loved it when he smiled at her like that, pure love and happiness. He shrugged at her as if to say “what are you going to do” and grinned. The roll of her eyes, the cocked eyebrow, and grin of her own was the only response worth the effort.

The snowman was huge, almost as tall as Gustaf. The kids found sticks and rocks to decorate him with and Gustaf picked Lily up to help with the face.

Sildie would have a full phone with all the pictures and video she took of them today but it was worth it. Building memories for the kids was so important. She managed to wrangle them all around the snowman for a photo and it made her smile to see the kids and Gustaf as a family. That guilt and grief still surfaced but it wasn’t all consuming today, the bite had gone out of it.

“Would you like me to take a picture for you miss?” A feminine voice said from behind her. “So you can join them?”

“Oh that’s ok it’s fine.”

“It’s no trouble.” She smiled and held out her hand for the phone.

Brendan saw Sildie try to turn down the offer and not be in the photo, and ran and grabbed her hand. He pulled her in so she stood behind the twins.

“Thank you so much.” She said after the shots were taken.

“No problem. You have a beautiful family. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.” The lady said kindly and waved to everyone before moving on.

She stood there looking at the photos and short video of them all laughing. It was their first family photo and her gut plummeted.

“Shit.” She muttered at the thought and willed the tears to stay away. “Not now.”

He saw her emotions change on her face before he felt the swing. The forced breath of air in and out as it hit her. Those long strides ate up the ground beneath him as he came to her.

“Breathe love.” He said gently as he wrapped his arm around her and kissed her brow. Lily hugged Ama too.

“I’m ok.” She closed her eyes and lost herself to his warmth, his scent and let it ground her and pull her back from the brink. It was still too raw.

His hand brushed her cheek before kissing her tenderly.

“What happened?” He asked gently.

She shook her head. “I’ll tell you when we get home. Not here, not now.” She said with the lawyers finality that he had no choice but to let it go.

“I’ll hold you to that love.” He murmured and kissed her tenderly.

“I know.” She smiled and Lily started to fuss. “And you miss are all worn out and need a nap. She’s going to be up half the night because I know she’ll sleep in the car.”

“It’ll be fine. She had fun today.” He kissed her cheek not ready to let her go just yet.

“I think I’m ready to go home and kick back.”

“Me too. I’ll get the boys.” He kissed her again and lingered. Tell her now he thought but hesitated. Not after nearly losing it, she wasn’t ready to hear it and the words wouldn’t come anyway, they’d denied him again.

Even though the boys said they wanted to stay longer Gustaf could see they were exhausted as they headed to the car. Exhausted, happy kids, it had been a good day.

Gustaf gently pressed her against the car when the kids were in and ready to go.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy.” She said as he smiled. She kissed him so his toes curled.

“You can’t kiss me like that when we’re in public and I can’t fuck you.” He said nipping her jaw and then kissed her in the exact same way so her mind imploded.

Damn he knew how to kiss a woman. “You’ll just have to wait then won’t you.” She purred.

“Get in the car.” He growled and her throaty chuckle only made him harder than he already was. The sooner they were home and the kids were in bed, the sooner he could have her.

The car ride home was quieter as the kids were worn out. It wasn’t surprising as they’d spent a good four hours tubing and sledding, then the snowball fight and snowman with Gustaf. It was a good release for them after yesterday, even for her.

He could all but hear her mind grinding on something as they drove home. Once he was out of the snow he brushed his knuckles against her thigh. Tender strokes to bring her back from where her mind was at. She was still fragile from yesterday, it would take time for it to settle again.

She laced her fingers with his. The gentle touch drawing her out of her thoughts. She couldn’t dwell and she knew that, it was just difficult to fathom they’d become a family. So much so that others noticed.

She looked at him as the car came to a stop and realized he was picking up Chinese. When did he order that she wondered? Taking care of her when she was falling apart all over him, again. The guy was going to get sick of doing that at some point.

They got in the apartment and sat down to eat, the kids were hungry and it was later than their usual dinner time. Sildie put a hand on Gustaf’s shoulder when he went to collect Lily and put her to bed.

“I’ll do it.” She said softly and kissed him.

“Come on Lily time for bed miss.” The little girl was working her way up to beyond the point of no return.

With her bathed, changed, and warm, Sildie snuggled with her in the chair. The occasional mum mum drifted to her as Lily started to calm.

“Busy day huh little lady? You had fun though.” She smiled against her hair as she kissed her head.

“Dad dad dad.” She mumbled as she was nearly asleep.

“Dad dads still here love, sleep now.” She soothed her with tender strokes up and down her back.

Gustaf watched them from the doorway, he’d heard Sildie soothe her over the baby monitor. His two best girls. How he desperately wanted to say those words that wouldn’t come. Maybe he wasn’t as ready as he thought he was, maybe he was rushing things.

He saw Sildie start to drift off, she was tired too. He moved to her quietly and grazed her jaw with his fingers. She inhaled deeply and looked at him. He lifted a now asleep Lily out of her arms and into her crib and settled on the floor like he usually did, one hand on Lily, the other on Sildie’s knee.

He rested his head against the bars of the crib and watched the child sleep. He heard the quiet weeping from Sildie and squeezed her knee gently. Remnants of yesterday crashing down around her he thought, he’d let her get it out and hopefully she’d talk to him over tea after.

“I’m going to go get the boys squared away.” She sniffed and went to rise.

“Take a breath first love.” He soothed and ran his hand up and down her thigh gently. “The boys are already taking their showers. Collect your thoughts first.” He murmured.

She did as he suggested and headed out. The twins were almost asleep by the time she got in there to tuck them in.

“Did you guys have fun today?” She asked sitting on the floor and their tired faces split into a grin as they nodded. “I’ll take that as a yes.” She chuckled.

“It’s was so much fun and Gustaf hit me with a huge snowball.” Liam said animatedly.

“Well you’ve seen the size on his hands so yeah the snowballs are going to be overly large.” She chuckled.

“Can we go there again sometime?” Finn asked softly.

“I think so, it’ll be something we can plan out a little more maybe stay overnight or something.” She suggested. It would be a good break for them at least.

“Sweet!” Finns face lit up more than she’d expected or seen in some time.

“Alright, sleep time now ok? Love you guys.” She kissed them both.

“Love you Ama.” Their twinned voices making her feel that pang of jealousy, she buried it deep.

“Night Ama.” Brendan said softly as she turned off the twins light and shut the door half way.

“Night B, you have a good time today?” She asked.

“So much fun.” His grin was wide. “I’m gonna get you back next time for the snow down the shirt.”

“Ha! We’ll see.” She scoffed. “Get some sleep, love you.”

“Love you too.” He said and closed his door.

She came out to Gustaf sitting at the table with a fresh pot of tea. The man just knew what she needed. Closing the hall door she made her way to him and snaked her hands over those strong shoulders and down his chest, planting a kiss on his neck. His hand took one of hers and brought it to his lips for a kiss before tugging her around and into his lap. He kissed her longingly, with a passion for her that ran to his core.

“You ok?” He asked gently and she nodded.

“It just hit me like a ton of bricks when the lady said goodbye.” She said and continued at seeing the puzzled look on his face.

“She said we have a beautiful family.” She choked, the sob threatening but she stopped it.

“You do.” His quiet reply had her shaking her head.

“No she said we, Gustaf, as in you and me.” She looked at him and saw his eyes widen slightly before he kissed her.

“Ok.” He said as if it wasn’t an issue, and it wasn’t for him, it’s what he wanted.

“You’re ok with it?”

“I am if you are.” He kissed her again and chuckled at her face. “Sildie I’m...” in. love. with. you. It’s not that difficult you moron. “I’m ok with it. Whole package remember? Together, you and me.” Chicken shit he swore at himself. You fucking chicken shit.

“Oh.” She relaxed.

“You thought I’d be angry?”

“No, I just... I don’t know, maybe. I nearly lost it today. It all came surging up so suddenly.”

“I know love.” His fingers toyed with her hair that had escaped her clip. “I know you feel guilty for what it looks like. Like you’re replacing them but you aren’t. You’re giving the kids a safe and loving environment.”

“So are you.” She looked at him. “You mean so much to them, to me.” Her fingers grazed the scruff at his jaw. “I can’t do this without you anymore.”

“I’m ok with that love.” He kissed her, those soft lips kissing him back. “I’m not angry, maybe a little ill equipped, but not angry.”

“You’re so good for them.”

“So are you.”

“It’s good to have you here, I don’t feel as out of my depth with it all when you’re here.” She chuckled and kissed him.

“Sink or swim.” He grinned.

“I remember thinking that the first time you met them.” She huffed and his chuckle made her smile.

“Me too.” His smile widened. “I thought at least if it went pear shaped I’d have someone else to go under with me.” He kissed her sweetly. “I’m glad we didn’t go under.” He whispered. SAY. IT. his mind screamed but it wouldn’t come out.

“So am I.” She kissed him and rested her forehead against his. “Will this get easier?” She asked quietly. “Tell me it gets easier.” Her voice choked.

“Hey, love, it’s ok.” He ran a soothing hand up and down her back. “With time, yes, it’ll get easier, but it’ll never leave you.” He murmured. “And you wouldn’t want it too. You’ll still remember them regardless but in time the pain will lessen.”

“Who did you lose?” She asked gently watching him closely as the old pain of loss resurfaced.

“My grandmother. We were very close.” And he smiled at the memory of her face. “She’d have liked you.” He said with undoubting finality and smiled at her. “Smart, sexy, and doesn’t take shit.”

He kissed her, willing the grief to leave her alone for a while. “You’re tired love. Finish your tea, go shower, and let me snuggle with you.” He took the clip from her hair and released the copper mane.

“I think I’ll just go to bed. I’m beat up after today’s marathon.” She huffed. “And I’ll need my energy for tomorrow.” She said and that smile turned mischievous.

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot about adult playtime tomorrow.” He winked at her as her eyebrow shot up. “I said almost.” He growled. “What time tomorrow?”

“Alice will be over at eleven.” She said kissing him seductively.

“That’s not going to be early enough if you keep kissing me like that love.” He smiled against her lips.

“You’ll have to wait, no spoiling my plans.” Her finger gazed his cheek, toying with his scruff.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He kissed her quickly. “I have a short errand to run tomorrow morning. A bunch of scripts to pick up and a few other things.” He kissed her as she stood. “I’ll make sure I’m back by eleven.”

“Don’t be late.” She whispered and kissed him before going to check on the kids. With him being out of his apartment was perfect for what she had planned. It would give her time to set up and get dressed.

“Wouldn’t dream of it love.” He he murmured. He wasn’t going to spoil her plans for the day she’d spent months working on.

He rinsed out the teapot, turned the lights off in the living room, checked the lock on the front door, and headed to the bedroom. She was already half asleep by the time he crawled in beside her. He rolled so he was pressed against her gently.

“Sleep love.” He whispered and kissed her tenderly.

She curled into him as his arm wrapped around her.

“Thank you.” She mumbled.

“Sleep now.” He kissed her brow and smiled as she sighed out and dropped into sleep.

He lay there while she slept and mentally kicked himself. He’d missed so many opportunities today to tell her he loved her. The words just wouldn’t come.

“Don’t force them.” He muttered. “It’s obviously not the right time.”

He felt like he’d let her down. She deserved to be told how loved she was, deserved so much better than he could give her. And those thoughts are dangerous. Maybe after his errands he could work the bag and meditate. He needed to keep his demons in check.

[whumpster-fire]

Whumptober Day 8: Isolation

Content Warnings For: Isolation (duh), Animal Abuse, Self-Harm, Animal Whumpee, Monster Whumpee, Trained responses, mention of bodily functions

The Indoraptor squinted out into the darkness of the space beyond the doors as they slowly swung open and his cage started to move. Darkness was good. Darkness was safe, not like the blinding floodlights all around him, even coming from the floor under his feet. He’d scratched at the floor for a while, trying to break them like he’d broken the light in his enclosure and make at least some of the uncomfortable glare go away, but the clear stuff was too strong for his claws. It was so bright that even with his excellent vision what lay ahead was lost in shadow, but he could hear, and he could smell.

Humans. There were humans everywhere, almost all of them unfamiliar. There was at least one talking very loudly, and maybe others more quietly, but it was hard to make out among all the noises of machinery and a droning, pulsing, rhythmic sound that seemed almost alive. There was a cacophany of smells too – human scents, and all the scents that accompanied humans, all the strong, headache-inducing plant smells. The tumult was maddening, but it was almost a relief compared to the assault on his senses that he’d just been released from.

For the first time he could remember, the cage he was being moved in was one of many, filled with other creatures that were different from the humans, and the other animals that were thrown into his enclosure as prey. If anything, they were like him, with scaly skin and long, tapering tails, some on two legs and some on four. They were tempting targets – every time he saw one turn its back he imagined stalking it, pouncing, and digging his claws into its spine and his teeth into its throat. But the noises – the heavy, echoing footsteps, and the slamming metal doors, and the roars and cries of distress that were at once exciting and unnerving, triggering the instinct to hunt and the sense of impending danger at the same time, and the fear scents and the foul odors from some of them soiling their cages, were too much at once. He’d started chewing and biting at his arms, struggling to resist the urge to draw blood. Pain was often his only respite from boredom, and in an odd way it was almost comforting, because it was something the humans used to control him, so if he could control when he felt pain it took a little of their power away. The victory was only in his mind, though: the pain-sticks the humans carried still hurt too much, and they tended to use them if he bit or clawed himself hard enough to bleed when they were watching.

Several of them surrounded the cage, watching him intently. The Indoraptor stood up on his back legs, trying to keep to the center, but there was barely even enough space to turn around in, not enough to be out of reach of the pain-sticks. He watched them back, and watched the humans farther away who were slowly coming into focus as his eyes started to adjust to the darkness, letting out anxious caws and chatters. This was something strange, something special, and that rarely meant anything good.

Sure enough, they struck him with the pain-sticks, sending burning, tingling shock waves across his body. He snapped at them, hissing and growling in annoyance, but it was only halfhearted. He knew from experience that they were too far away to reach. A couple times a human had gotten too close, and he’d hooked a claw into a limb and dragged him to his death, or at least inflicted a long, deep cut after which that particular human didn’t return, but it only ever brought more pain and being shot with the sleep guns. He could reach the pain-sticks themselves, but even if he took one away from the humans and broke it they had more, and getting shocked in the move or hand hurt even worse. It was pointless to try to fight back. If the humans wanted him to feel pain, there was no way to stop them. But it was making him angry, too angry to sit still and not give them the response they wanted.

Then there was a noise that was familiar – a high, warbling whistle. Immediately Indoraptor was alert, looking around and tilting his head to pinpoint the source. The Light Gun. The Light Gun was one of the only good things he knew. It meant food, and usually better food than normal, still alive food, if he attacked the thing that the red light was pointed at. It had been hard to understand at first. He could only attack the target of the light, and only when the gun made its other, louder sound. If he attacked too early, or attacked the wrong thing – even if the target wasn’t food and something else was – or didn’t obey in time, he’d be hurt, and he wouldn’t be fed for a long time.

The light was pointed at one of the humans in the front of the rows further away, sitting down. Indoraptor’s heart began to race as he caught the human fear-scent. It had been in the room before, but it was stronger now. The man was far out of reach. Were they going to open the cage? Let him free? He sized up the target, his throat quivering in anticipation. Then the screech of the second noise sounded. The response was automatic, out of his control. He flung himself at the human, slamming his head painfully against the bars. But the door wasn’t opening! He couldn’t reach!

He bit and clawed furiously at the bars, stretching his arms out between as far as he could, screaming in frustration. This wasn’t fair! He was going to fail, and they would hurt him again, but this was impossible! He saw a human with a pain-stick start to move towards him. No! He lunged again, frantically beating his head against the bars. A tooth broke, and his nose was bleeding, but he couldn’t stop. His breath started to wheeze and rattle in his throat, and his head felt like it was tipping from side to side. He stumbled, and in another desperate attempt to pounce his feet slid out from under him. He crashed to the floor in a tangled heap of shaking limbs, and lay there, panting and gasping for air. One of the men with pain sticks made a move towards him. He responded with a furious hiss that turned into a fit of coughing, and shrank back away from the wall. His head hurt, and his chest was throbbing like his ribs were broken.

The pain-stick struck him once, twice. He snarled and hissed, lashing his tail against the bars and beating at the cage, but when he struck with his claws the man easily backed out of reach. But he had to do something with the anger boiling inside him. Had to kill… had to hurt… he tucked his head under his arms, and dragged his claws down the sides of his head. The scales broke. Sharp, burning pain flooded his mind, and warm, wet liquid ran down his neck and dripped onto the clear floor of the cage. But the maddening human fear-scent coming from all around him only grew stronger. He glared out at them through eyes blurred with tears. What he wouldn’t give to be out of that little cell… He’d make all of them pay… every single one of them...

~~~

A/N: I’ve been wanting to write about Indoraptor for a while, because Jesus... if there’s any demonstration of the sheer incompetence and ignorance of animal welfare of every villain in the Jurassic Park series, it’s this. This poor animal spent his entire life trapped in a small, dark cage underground, with little to no enrichment or social interaction, and trained by the kind of scumbags who, in their little demo, physically abused him to get him angry and making noise for the customers, and visibly didn’t reward a trained behavior. And then Wu’s dumb ass blamed it on genetics.

Bitch forget Blue’s DNA: before you try kidnapping a dinosaur for her genetic material because you lost the files, try raising a goddamn Golden Retriever with the same practices you’re planning on using for your purpose-built dinosaur-based killing machine and if you still get a vicious, uncontrollable animal the problem probably isn’t the genetics. Or, y’know, don’t since that would be abusive too. Instead consider asking literally any competent dog trainer about your plans to raise a dog like this and watch the reactions.

Anyway, I saw concept art a scrapped design of Indoraptor that was covered in tumors because of bad genetic engineering, which is cool, but ya know what? Screw that, make the movie really realistic and have him be covered in self-harm scars. Parrots are just about the closest thing to Jurassic Park’s raptors in real-life, and they frequently rip their own feathers out and tear themselves to shreds if neglected or stressed in captivity. This would also give Owen an opportunity to point this out and show that he is a competent animal behaviorist, something that doesn’t happen nearly enough.

But of course, Fallen Kingdom disappointed me on this, just like it disappointed me with... just about everything else besides basically being a canon whump fic for Blue.

[katastroficwriter]

Cutscene #5

*Once again, I apologize for the late update. This update would feel very rushed--but that’s because of my inexperience with writing action/fighting scenes. And because I needed to push the story to where it needs to be as soon as possible. I hope this fact won’t reduce your enjoyment of my au. ^^;

May 18, 20xx, 4:43 pm

“Hey, Kiiboy?”

“Not now.”

“Yes now.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Ye~s!”

Kiibo leaned against his seat, sighing in exasperation as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “What do you want this time? Can’t you see that I still have a lot of schoolwork I need to catch up on?”

“What I see is that you are in desperate need of a good walk in the park, my friend,” Ouma shamelessly plucked his roommate’s reading glasses and wore it on his head. “Getting stressed about doing work while doing work is hardly productive, you know.”

They spent a couple of minutes in an impromptu staring contest, to which Kiibo eventually forfeited.

“Fine. I suppose I do need a breather,” Kiibo snatched his reading glasses back from his roommate’s head. “As long as we don’t stay out too long, I guess it’s okay.”

“Great! There’s this good hotdog stand by the park. My treat!” Ouma grinned. ‘Step one--cleared.’

Kiibo shook his head. “No. I’ll treat you. You took care of me while I was sick.”

Ouma blinked in surprise before moving to cover his pleased smile. “Be careful there Kiiboy. Keep doing this and I might just fall in love~”

The albino simply rolled his eyes as he pocketed his wallet. “Ha, ha. Anyway, are we going or not?”

“Heck yeah we are!” Ouma skipped towards the doorway after shrugging his backpack on.

“What’s the backpack for?” Kiibo asked as he locked their room.

“It’s just in case something happens! Like sauce spilling on my shirt. Also first aid kit in case you...I don’t know, slip and fall or something. You’re just so clumsy that I can’t afford to be confident that you’re getting out of this trip unscathed.”

“Is this how you see me?” Kiibo huffed.

“I’m just stating facts, my good sir,” Ouma tipped his invisible hat. “Anyway we better hurry! If we wait around any longer they might run out of the good stuff!” He grabbed his roommate by the wrist and made a dash for the school gate.

After paying for their hotdogs, Ouma led Kiibo farther and farther from the crowd of people and into the forest. Which normally would raise alarm bells in any sane person who was being tugged into a forest. But this was Ouma. If Ouma wanted to murder him, he would have done so as soon as he went to sleep.

“Why are you taking me into the forest?”

“I usually go for walks while eating, and I happened to find this great spot to watch the sunset. There’s also a bench there! The best part is, no one really wants to walk all the way here just for a seat. So it’s practically all ours,” Ouma grinned.

“I see...”

“Oh it’s here! Man the light reflects really well in the lake--”

“A lake?”

“Yeah, a lake!” Ouma grabbed Kiibo by the wrist for the umpteenth time that day and led him to the bench with unbridled excitement.

Kiibo had his doubts, but the sunset view had rendered him speechless. Ouma wasn’t lying--the view was gorgeous. The way the sun’s rays bathed the forest with a soft yellow glow was something worth painting. Oh, if only he were a painter...

“You sitting or not?” Ouma punctuated his question by shoving the hotdog in his mouth as he patted the free space beside him.

“Ah,” Kiibo shook his head a little to snap out of his daze. “I’m sitting.”

Ouma simply smiled at him with his eyes since he was still busy chewing. At least he still had the manners to not speak while eating.

They spent time eating their snack in comfortable silence as they watched the golden orb that is the sun slowly sink under the horizon.

“Soooo...whatcha think?” Ouma tilted his head as he grinned--cheek stained with ketchup and mustard. Not at all ashamed of breaking the silence.

“...I think you need to clean your face up,” Kiibo heaved out a sigh as he made a move to wipe the other man’s face with a tissue. “And...you’re right. It’s pretty good. The price is affordable too.”

“Riiiight?! I always try to drop by their stand everyday--except when my schedule doesn’t allow me at all,” Ouma grabbed the tissue from the albino and started wiping his face on his own.

“By the way, there’s something I’ve been wondering about.”

“Mm?”

“I still find it weird that there’s a bench all the way out into the forest.” Kiibo looked around their vicinity. It was his first time visiting the forest area located in the park, and he wasn’t too sure if it’s normal to find a well furnished bench hidden by trees and foliage.

“No, actually,” Ouma paused to finish his last bite. “It wasn’t here before, but maybe I’m not the only person who found this spot after all. Probably asked some of the people in charge to move a bench here.” That’s a lie, of course. This was simply Step 2 of his plan.

“I see...I suppose that makes sense.”

“Well, at least we benefited off of it,” Ouma smiled, stretching his arms over his head before standing up and walking towards the lake. “I wouldn’t have brought you here if it weren’t for the bench.”

“So the bench was the most important thing here and not the view?” Kiibo quirked a brow.

“Of course! My comfort--and in this case, our comfort is way more important than watching the sun,” Ouma wagged a finger as though he was sharing valuable wisdom. “We can enjoy the view better if we’re comfortable.”

“You’re right,” Kiibo then crumpled the hotdog wrapper and shoved it in his pocket. “...Anyway, it’s getting dark. We should head back now.”

“No! Not yet!” Ouma puffed his cheeks. “We’re not here just to watch the sun set. We’re also here to watch the moon rise!”

“The moon...you do realize it would be really dark in the forest if we actually wait for the moon--”

“I know! That’s why I packed a flashlight in my backpack,” Ouma waved a hand in the general direction of his backpack which was resting on the bench.

“You’re awfully prepared for this. Did you plan to lure me out here from the start?” Kiibo shook his head in mild disbelief.

“What if I was? It worked, didn’t it?” Ouma winked. Now this was definitely not a lie. “Relax. Just stay in your seat and watch the moon, alright? We’ll go home as soon as it’s over.”

Aquamarine eyes stared into amethyst. He’s really doing a bad job at winning in conversations today. “Alright. Dinner’s going to be on you tonight.”

“I accept your terms,” Ouma could see it--how relaxed the albino was. His pupils were slowly dilating--the moon wasn’t out yet but the dark sky was starting to affect him. His body knows what’s about to come. Fortunately for both of them, Ouma knows too.

Truth be told, the thought of watching the moon rise filled him with dread.

Kiibo found it odd how he couldn’t remember anything that’s transpired during nighttime for the past few week. He can’t trust himself to study at night because of this. Which is why he rescheduled his studying time to the afternoon. It scared him a little--feeling this way. But surely there wasn’t anything wrong with him? Maybe he was falling asleep without him realizing which is why he doesn’t remember much about the night before…

“Kiiboy, it’s here.”

Prompted by his roommate’s voice, he looked up at the rising moon.

That was when he felt completely odd. His body froze at the sight of the glowing white orb on the darkened sky. His body felt hot. Extremely hot. His bones were aching. His entire body was shaking. His mind was growing blank the longer he stared at the glowing celestial body.

The worst part were his thoughts.

Kill.

Destroy.

Tear it to shreds!!!

Such violent words invaded his mind. Words that have never crossed his mind were filling his headspace. Commanding him to obey. He moved to stand up, trying to steady himself with the bench.

The pain that followed was sharp. Excruciating. It felt like he was being ripped apart and then later reassembled into a form that’s only vaguely his. Much like a badly sewn ragdoll that was given the Frankenstein treatment.

“Gghhk!!” The pain was unbearable. He couldn’t hear himself. But he could feel it. He could feel his throat growing raw from all his screaming. He felt like he was being slowly ripped apart from the seams.

Deaf to his own screams of agony, Kiibo didn’t realize that the sound that left his mouth were no longer screams of a pained human being--but rather the angered howls of a wild beast.

The soft rustling of the trees and the sight of leaves falling like gentle rain did little to calm the situation.

“Heh...not a bad form at all, Kiiboy. You’re honestly a lot bigger than what I expected you to be.“

“But size has never stopped me from putting a pup in its place.���

Their battle was without ceremony. What else do you expect when one of the parties is a rampaging werewolf?

Kiibo was completely acting out on his new instincts. The instinct to kill any and every vampire in sight. Despite his rather large form, his agility was not to be underestimated if Ouma wanted to live. Which he does.

Ouma swiftly transformed into his bat form and flew above his rampaging roommate before reverting to his previous form and landed a strong kick across the werewolf’s torso--sending it flying into a lake. He took this chance to catch his breath and to assess the damages he’s sustained.

“Tch...I won’t be able to hold out for too long at this rate...” he panted. “The one thing I desperately needed but failed to get a hold off--blood. Fucking awesome.” He glared at the torn sight of his navy blue hoodie. “He owes me a new hoodie too.”

The werewolf let out a furious howl as soon as it got out of the lake’s watery depths. It seems kicking him in ice-cold water only made him angrier.

Ouma cursed his exhaustion when he lost his footing mid-dodge. He grunted as his head collided against a tree before getting pinned beneath the growling creature.

“Shit--!!!” Ouma screamed when he felt Kiibo’s canines dig in his right shoulder. “Get off me you dumbass!” he aimed his punches at the albino’s eye in the hopes of making it lose its grip on his shoulder. Fortunately, it worked.

The vampire then struggled to move his legs upwards until his knees are pushing against his chest. “I said get off!!!” He kicked Kiibo on the chest with both of his feet as hard as he could.

Ouma then grabbed a fallen tree by its roots and smacked Kiibo away from him, not giving the werewolf time to recover at all. With a palm resting against his bleeding shoulder, he teleported on the werewolf’s back and dug his nails into its shoulder, eliciting a pained howl followed by another angrier one.

“Oh shut up! I’ve had enough of your BULLSHIT!” It had been centuries since he’s had his fangs out in its full length. It almost felt alien to him. Almost. He made sure to put in all of his strength into this one bite.

The deliciously rich flavor of werewolf blood mixing with Kiibo’s human ones filled his throat much to his content. His strength was returning and he could already feel his wound closing. Even Kiibo was having a hard time getting him off his back due to his growing strength.

Ouma only let go once he felt the muscles and bones beneath him shifting and crunching. He licked his lips as he watched his roommate slowly revert back to his original form. His naked and shivering form.

The vampire then moved to grab his backpack from the mess of fallen trees and pulled out a fresh change of clothes he got for Kiibo. He didn’t miss the confusion in the albino’s eyes when the latter saw his bloodied form approaching him in calm strides.

“What...happened?“ Kiibo’s voice was hoarse. Raw from all his screaming and howling before, during, and after his transformation.

“Oh, nothing much. Just had some intense make out session that got of hand. Ended up destroying a few trees here and there because of how amazing a kisser I was,” Ouma deadpanned. “--Of course that’s a fucking lie! You turned into a werewolf Kiiboy! I could have died!” He tossed the clothing at the albino with a frown.

“A...a werewolf...?” Kiibo blanched at the thought.

“Wear your clothes first. I’ll answer your questions later,“ Ouma idly rubbed his right shoulder, hiding his satisfaction of finding that the wound was no longer there.

Due to the roughhousing earlier, the bench got wrecked into mere splinters, and so they had no other options but to sit on the grass. As Kiibo listened to the voice recording Ouma took with his new phone, he felt dizzier and dizzier. The screaming was definitely his. And although it was a little vague--even during the growling parts, he could still hear traces of his voice coming from it.

Ouma’s bloody face and clothes were an indicator that this wasn’t an elaborate plot just to mess with him.

“I...how? This never happened before!” Kiibo regarded his companion with panicked eyes. “How could I...how could I suddenly turn into a monster?!”

“The ‘dog’ you took care of was a werewolf, you ding-dong,“ Ouma huffed. “How could you even mistake a wolf for a dog!?”

“It was barking, Ouma-kun. Wolves don’t bark! They howl, they growl--they don’t bark as often as dogs do!” Kiibo hissed, faltering a little when the pain from the previous skirmish was finally registering.

“Tch. Terrific acting from an old bastard, I see,” Ouma bit on thumbnail. “...In any case, everything’s going to be okay.”

“Okay? No I’m not! How am I supposed to deal with this?!” Kiibo grunted when he felt a slightly dislocated shoulder pop back into place. One of the perks of his new predicament is his enhanced healing. Not that it made him any happier. “There’s going to be another full moon tomorrow and--I still have a lot of schoolwork to do! I can’t--I can’t possibly juggle being a student and a monster at the same time!”

“Of course you can! All you need is some proper training and you’ll be able to keep your self-awareness even during a full moon,” Ouma patted him on the back. “Dogs can be trained. And you’re practically a big dog. Chin up!”

“Training. I don’t even know where to start.... For one thing I won’t be conscious tomorrow to even think of training, am I?” Kiibo groused, burying his face in his knees.

“It’s fiiine. Because I’m a vampire. I can keep you in check,” Ouma smiled.

Kiibo lifted his head to glare at him. “Look, it’s nice and all that you’re trying to cheer me up. But cracking jokes like that just makes me want to smack you. Because now is definitely not the time for jokes like that.”

“Huh? But it’s not a joke though! See for yourself!” Ouma tapped his neck on the left side, prompting the albino to do the same.

Kiibo froze when he felt two deep puncture wounds on his neck which was still in the process of healing up. He looked up at Ouma, eyes widening in shock when the latter unabashedly showed him his fangs.

He knew that he really should be more shocked--but the revelation that he’s going to be stuck as a werewolf monster for the rest of his life took the brunt of his shock. Not to mention how it felt like he had solved a mysterious riddle surrounding his odd roommate.

“Is that why you’ve been going around licking my wounds all this time?”

“Yup!”

Kiibo hid his face in his hands. His days of peace are now over.

“Nishishi! Don’t worry, I know a thing or two about werewolves~” Ouma snickered. “I’ll train you in exchange for your blood!”

“M...my blood?” Kiibo gulped.

“Mmmhm~” Ouma placed a finger against his own lips. “Now that you’re a werewolf, I could feed to my heart’s content without worrying about turning you~”

“I...I see...” Kiibo’s mind was reeling from the new knowledge. He knew he didn’t have much choice. Ouma was a vampire--another monster. He was pretty much the only person who can restrain him in his werewolf form as proven by this night alone. This was his only bet of maintaining his normal life without causing trouble for everyone. “...Alright. I accept.”

Ouma’s pupils narrowed into slits as he smirked. “That settles that then.”

[not-reddie]

Richie Tozier Must Die - Prologue.

Hi guys! So this idea popped into my head and I really couldn’t resist! I’m so pumped to write this fic!

I will still be posting Night Changes so don’t worry, but I really hope you like this. Of course it’s inspired by the movie “John Tucker Must Die” ! i’ll be changing it up a bit though!

Word count: 910.

Eddie backs away, but they keep coming forward, cornering him. He feels like prey, perhaps a small rabbit, and his predators are studying him closely, ready to pounce at any moment. He eventually hits the back wall of the classroom, and gulps upon the realisation that he has nowhere else to go.

The boy, who he can’t quite remember the name of, but he thinks is called Joshua, jerks his thumb at the desk next to them, and Eddie, knowing that his 3 against 1 chances aren’t looking too good for him, cautiously places his bag down before sitting.

“We’ve been thinking a lot about what you said, and we have a proposition for you,” Emily tells him, sounding bored, looking bored. She always has an aura about her, one that says, “I would literally rather be anywhere but here.” Eddie thinks that the feeling is mutual.

“We need you to date Richie Tozier,” Lucy speaks up, smacking gum in her mouth obnoxiously. Eddie can see that it’s been stained by her bright red, overbearing lipstick, and he internally cringes. If her top was cut any lower, Eddie’s positive her whole breast would be on display. Her mini skirt is only saved by the fact that she’s wearing thigh high boots.

“W-what? Why would I do that?” Eddie squeaks, his throat going dry, a blush tainting his cheeks. The pack of wolves are going to tear him to shreds. The predators have gone for the kill.

“You’re the first person I’ve ever met at this god-forsaken place that doesn’t seem to be affected by Richie Tozier’s charm. We need you to make him fall in love with you, and then rip his heart out of his chest and stamp on it, just like he did to us.”

“That’s crazy. Richie would never go for that. We've never even spoke! Besides, why would I help you?”

This seems to get Emily’s attention, and she turns to look him straight in the eyes. She smirks at him, and Eddie gulps down his nerves.

“You want valedictorian, right?”

“Um… yeah?”

“I can make sure that happens.”

Eddie’s eyes widen in surprise, but he knows she isn’t lying. Emily is the school's golden girl, and student body president. She plays a facade around the teachers as an innocent, hard working school girl, and she has them practically eating out of her manicured hands.

“You’re serious?”

“Do I look like I’m kidding?” She didn’t, Eddie noted. She really, really didn’t.

Eddie squirms in his seat, feeling so guilty for even considering it. It’s not right, and he knows it. But valedictorian? The one and only thing he’s ever dreamed of? Can he really pass it up?

“Well… don’t you think that maybe your plan is a little bit extreme? I mean, I know he’s an asshole but, don’t you think maybe you’re taking things a little bit too far?”

“He broke our hearts, don’t you think he deserves a taste of his own medicine? He’s too cocky for his own good, and we think it’s about time somebody taught him a lesson.” Eddie jumps in surprise when he hears the deep voice because he had forgotten that Josh was even here. He hadn’t really said much.

He looks to where Josh is sitting, towards the front of the classroom. He’s sat on one of the front-row desks, furthest away from the group. He’s taken off his shoes and propped his feet up on the desk in front of his own, and Eddie has to bite his tongue so he doesn’t end up lecturing Josh on how unsanitary that is. He figures it would be a waste of his breath anyway, because Josh doesn’t seem like the type to give a shit.

Eddie stares up at the three faces looking back at him, chewing on the inside of his lip anxiously as he ponders the offer in his head. The thing is, he really needs to be valedictorian if he has any hope of getting that scholarship. And Eddie really needs that scholarship. There’s absolutely no way he can afford to pay through college on his own.

Emily leans forward, bracing her palms on either side of the desk. Her eyebrow is raised in expectation, a half smirk hanging off her lips. She knows that she’s got Eddie interested. Eddie has seen first hand how much of a jerk Richie Tozier is, so maybe it’s not too bad after all.

“I don’t think he’d go for it. I’m not exactly…” Eddie sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. Is he really going to do this?

“I have no idea how to seduce people, okay? I have no idea what I’m doing. He might not even go for me.”

“That’s what we’re here for!” Lucy speaks out, and her face lights up like she’s come up with a ground-breaking idea. It only makes Eddie nervous.

“We’ll totally teach you! We’ll be your coaches, show you what to do. It’s like, super easy!” Every time Lucy says something, Eddie wants to cringe. She is the real life version of “dumb hot high school girl” clichés, and Eddie almost pity's her. Almost.

“With an ass like that, he’s definitely going to go for you,” Emily winks, reigning the conversation back into her control. Eddie ducks his head, blushing furiously.

Making a decision, despite the twisting of protest in his gut, Eddie looks back up and sighs, feeling defeated.

“Ok. I’ll do it.”

@richietoaster @reddie-to-go @edwardtheloser

[the-kryomancer]

Alone: Magicwatch AU

Warning: profanity, angst, mentions of death, angst, body horror, ANGST, funeral, alcohol, ANGST HOLY SHIT

A/N: So, I cried writing this. I really cried. It was so sad to write. I’m sorry. Kind of. It’s an important scene but IT’S SO SAD. For @nutbrain14 because they asked for something McCree. This is the prequel to The Midnight Visitor

It hit him like a ton of bricks. Ana had been the one to tell him.

“I’m sorry, Jesse,” she had said. “He’s dead.”

He didn’t believe her. Not until he saw the body.

He was angry. He’s still angry. If Jack wasn’t already dead he’d kill him.

“Fuck,” Jesse mumbled. He was curled on the couch in pain as he felt his muscles and bones shift. This transformation was different. He didn’t have to restrain himself. He didn’t have to worry about accidentally hurting his father.

Jesse’s eyes teared up at the memory of Gabriel. He sat up—biting his lip in the process to keep himself from screaming—and wiped away the never ending tears. “You’re a grown man, Jesse.” He scolded himself. “Get yerself together.” He wiped away the tears one last time before standing up and stumbling into the kitchen. He carefully made his way over to the counter where he took out a glass and a bottle of whiskey. With shaky hands he poured the alcohol into his glass and took a sip. He shuttered as the drink burned down his throat and left a warm feeling in his gut.

Drinking always numbed the pain. His father would rarely let him drink it during transformations though.

The glass in his hand shattered as he was bringing it to his lips.

“Damn,” he cursed. The glass shards fell harmlessly into the dirty sink. Jesse let out a sigh. He’d deal with it in the morning.

A wave of pain ran up his back—his knees buckled and he grunted. He gripped the edge of the sink to keep himself from falling. He rested his sweaty forehead against the cool surface of the sink. Jesse took deep breaths.

“Wish you were here, dad.”

He stood up slowly, the pain spread to ever part of his body. He shuffled toward the den and threw himself back onto the couch. He winced and instantly regretted that action as pain shot through his back. Another wave of pain followed soon after.

Before Jesse could prepare himself his bones shifted and his skin grayed. Dark brown fur sprouted from his body, and he grabbed the couch cushions in pain. His nails hardened into claws and he ripped holes into the couch. His clothes tore, leaving him bare naked in his wolf form.

Jesse took in the room. The floor was coated in blood and his destroyed clothing, and the couch was shredded. He lowered his head and rested it on the floor. He whimpered softly, wishing Gabriel was there with him. He missed Gabriel.

Jesse lifted his head.

He had… thoughts. He was aware and didn’t have any animalistic traits at the moment.

For the first time ever he was in control during his transformation.

He sat up with a groan. His head was hurting and his muscles were sore. Jesse remembered everything from that night clearly. It was odd. He usually had blurry memories.

A knock on the door pulled him from his thoughts. He got up and grabbed a blanket from a chair. There was another knock. “I’m comin’!” He shouted. He held the blanket so it covered his waist and with the other he opened the door.

In the doorway stood Ana Amari. Her black hair had gray scattered in it and a blue eyepatch covered her left eye. She was dressed in all black and the hood of the clock was pulled over her head.

“Ana? What are you doing here?” Jesse mumbled as he rubbed his eye and yawned. He felt like he had a hangover.

“We need to talk, Jesse.” Ana brushed past him and walked into the small home. She headed for the kitchen. “I’ll make breakfast. You should go get dressed.”

Jesse muttered a snarky reply and trudged up the stairs to his room.

He sat at the kitchen table across from Ana. A plate of sausage and eggs sat in front of both of them. Ana took a sip of her tea while Jesse chewed sausage.

Ana caught sight of his tired look and knew something was wrong. She chose not to mention it. “You look terrible.”

Jesse shrugged. “I was a wolf last night. Does that qualify as an excuse?”

It was brought up anyway.

She cleared her throat. “I would have come last night but it seemed like you needed time alone. Plus, I wasn’t sure if I was welcome or not.”

“You’re always welcome.” Jesse gave her a small smile.

Ana reached across the table and gave Jesse’s hand a comforting squeeze. She contemplated for a few moments before speaking.

“The funeral is this morning. I was hoping you’d come. For Gabriel’s sake.” Jesse let out a sigh. “He’d want you there. You meant a lot to him.”

“I was his son. Not once did he ever say that he loved me. How am I supposed to know?” Jesse asked bitterly. He loved his father, he truly did. But that affection wasn’t always reciprocated.

Ana let out a sigh. “Gabriel was going to retire. He was going to propose you as his replacement.”

“He– he what?” Jesse stuttered.

Ana nodded. “It was going to be a surprise for your birthday.” She ran a hand through her hair, and took another sip of her tea. “I decided that after the funeral I will take a leave of absence. I need some time to myself to think.”

Jesse was taken aback by this. “But who’ll take care of Fareeha? I’m hardly able to take care of myself. Besides, I won’t have time.”

“I have faith that Jared can take care of her. Fareeha is his daughter too.” She replied.

Jesse scoffed. “I trust the King as far as I can throw him. And after what happened in Lumperland–”

“That happened before you were born–”

“My school had a history class–”

“–yet you don’t hate Gabriel for what happened in Lumperland.”

Jesse closed his mouth. He had nothing to reply. He never thought about what Gabriel had done in Lumperland. He knew his father was in the infamous Lumperland Massacre but he wasn’t sure what Gabriel did.

Ana squeezed his hand again. “Jesse, I’m putting you in charge while I’m gone. I trust you. Please, take care of the citizens.”

He squeezed her hand back. “I will. But promise you’ll write to me. I can’t lose you too.”

Ana nodded. “Now, we have a funeral to go to.”

It was a small funeral, much smaller than Jack’s. Ana tried to reach out to Gabriel’s family but they were resentful and refused to come.

Jesse was thankful Gabriel was buried with his amulet. The ceremony was quiet and simple. There was a priest who spoke, and Ana got up to say a few things. Torbjörn and King Merlin spoke as well. The crowd fell silent when Jesse went up. Ana didn’t need to convince him to speak. He already decided when they arrived.

“I was a stupid kid when he took me in. He saw something in me that no on else did— even myself. He knew I could be more than just a thief. And I’m grateful for that.” He cleared his throat and held back the tears. “Gabriel Reyes was a good man. He was a good father.” He wiped away a stray tear. “I didn’t know what I was going to do when he died. I still don’t. I–” Jesse let out a shaky breath, “–I want to honor him. I hope I can’t be like him one day. But how can I be so selfless, so strong, so brave? I don’t think I can, but his sake I’ll try.” He stopped fighting the tears. “He’s my father and I love him. Even though he didn’t really show it I know he loves me too.”

Ana walked over and took Jesse’s hand. She guided him to the group and they watched Gabriel’s coffin get buried. Jesse looked away and squeezed his eyes shut. Ana noticed this and pulled him into a hug. Jesse buried his face in her shoulder and sobs racked his body.

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[bettsplendens]

Alzu and Almul inspect a corpse, Almul takes out some frustration on said corpse. Warning: messy. Descriptions of a corpse being messily taken apart and inspected. Also- it’s not technically cannibalism because they aren’t the same species, but Alzu is an opportunistic carnivore faced with a body made of meat. His response is unsurprising. 

“What- you wanna know why that works?”

Alzu kicked lightly at the corpse of someone who had formerly been a rather nasty rapist, turning the body over to look down at the severely burned face. “Yeah, actually- not a bad question. See- clearly dead, but you only burned ‘is face. Got all choke-y, though. Bet he couldn’t breathe, but- yeah, might as well, let’s figure ‘er out. Gonn’ make a mess o’ the guy anyway, may as well learn.”

Hefting the corpse, Alzu tossed it over one shoulder and set off, tail wagging slightly as he watched Almul following. Almul got an energy boost from being near something that was dying, so they were now trotting happily, almost seeming to whistle as thin lines of smoke wafted up from their frame. If Alzu were to open Almul’s chest, their life-flame would be visible and burning bright.

Once they were well away from the road, Alzu dropped the corpse and pulled a large hunting knife from its spot alongside his pack, crouching to inspect it. “A’ight- let’s see if I can open this wi’out makin’ a mess.”

 Almul sat down nearby and rested both hands on the ground, watching intently as fragile human hide parted under the knife, and didn’t bother trying to hide their satisfaction at the noise it made. Ugh- smooth skin. They had nothing against humans, really, but the squishy things still had such an awful texture. And, after so long feeling that inside them, unable to see properly or focus on anything else, there was something viscerally satisfying about watching-

Wait, now… it didn’t have to just be watching. Rumbling softly, Almul reached out with one hand and slowly dragged it down the man’s leg, watching the cloth part, then repeated the motion- this time tearing through skin. And he was right- it was satisfying. So very, very satisfying. Enough that he repeated the motion, then again- with both hands this time, clawtips sharp as possible, ripping pale skin to shreds. Then further through skin, into and through muscle, shredding in further until the still blood started to cake their hands-

 “Woah, hey- Almul, you wanna mess ‘im up, I got no complaints, bu’ you might be gettin’ kinda- hey now, easy, shh. Catharsis is all well an’ good, jus’ no good makin’ yerself more upset while ya do it. Easy- shift t’ th’ other leg now, gonn’ get blood all up in yer hands. Yeah? There we go.” Alzu purred, pausing in his careful parting of the skin and muscle to watch Almul for a moment. “Tha’s better.”

He had to crack the ribcage rather carefully to get to the lungs intact, but it worked, though he had to pull a few large chunks of rib out. And, of course, pop them into his mouth to chew on. “Now-“ *crunch* “-what we have here arrrre- lookit, tha’s a heart, you know ‘bout them. Now, these’re lungs. You also know ‘bout them, yeah? We got heart here- pushes blood ‘round. Lungs, they get air in ‘em. People really need air in ‘em or they die, you figured tha’ out. This, here- diaphragm. Real strong hunk o’ muscle. This- pretty sure it pulls down an’ helps open th’ lungs. Ain’t no good for eatin’, not bad fer jus’ chewin’ on. Anyway- lungs. They got air in ‘em. All th’  way up- that’s th’ windpipe. Gonn’ cut that through, an’-“

A few deft cuts and nicks with his claws, and he lifted the lungs out of the human’s chest, splaying them grotesquely across the relatively intact stomach. The hunting knife, next- slicing down the windpipe, then into and across one of the lungs. When he spread them open, thick burns were revealed all down the windpipe and into the lungs, scorching them almost beyond recognition. “Well. There’s yer problem.”

Pausing to point out the issue, Alzu aimed a tongue-lolling grin at Almul, prodding at a particularly bad spot. “Lookit this mess, Almul- that ain’t good! Okay, look- I dunno how lungs really work, but I doubt they can do it when they’re all burnt up. Tha’s why ‘e’s dead. You gotta have lungs t’ be a workin’ human, an’ they gotta work, an’ you made ‘is lungs not work. Nasty. But- mmph-“

Clearly he had to see what those tasted like. And they fit in his mouth in two nice bites.

“-like a lotta nasty things, tasty.”

 Almul had mostly been ignoring Alzu’s work in favor of clawing up the corpse’s other leg, stripping long ribbons of skin free and hissing in satisfaction with every long stroke, but they stopped to look the organ over before Alzu, once again, ate their anatomy lesson. Chirping quietly, they shook their head and flicked both hands, peeling loose the bits of gore, and leaned over to look down at the exposed organs. Humans were complicated. What did all this do, again? They only knew about the bits that could make someone dead if you damaged them right. So, making the noise that they’d established with Alzu as meaning “please explain”, they indicated something that was in the “this will eventually kill someone but not right away” section, wanting to know what some of those things did.

 “Wha? Ah- let’s see. Okay. That, there, tha’s a liver. Real tasty, lotsa meaty flavor. Not certain wha’ it does, bu’ I know people who drink a lot got real messed-up ones, an’ there’s some diseases that’ll do it. Makes people ge’ yellow eyes, an’ they get real sick when they got messed-up livers, so I think it does somethin’ like blood-cleanin’? Now- this, in here, dunno. Uh- tha’ thing? Tha’s a kidney. Lookit- you follow th’ string down, goes t’ the bladder. Tha’s where piss stays. I figure kidneys’re wha’ make it. Dunno why, sorry, y’d need a doctor. Uh- you punch someone in their back, o’r th’ kidneys, they start screamin’. Don’ taste good, either. Now- I am gonn’ eat this liver.”

Alzu then proceeded to eat the liver, tail wagging vigorously, before just driving both hands into the corpse’s innards and ripping. Standard contract deal- make a horrific mess of someone’s innards, hang them up as a warning, write whatever they did on something nearby.

In this case, a cliff.

 Almul sat back and watched, fascinated as always by the way flesh tore under proper force, and kneaded their claws in the leaf litter to clean the worst of the blood away. As Alzu continued to work, they edged over and grabbed the pack, pulling out a length of rope, and fastened it around the corpse’s ankles. The knot was not neat, they were still learning how all that worked, but it held well enough, and they had the end of the rope in their hands as Alzu stood up.

 “Yeah- there we go, yer learnin’ how ta make knots.” Alzu declared, tail waving a bit harder, and hoisted the corpse in both hands so that the end of the rope could be tossed over the branch. A quick pull and another knot later, and the corpse was suspended from the tree by both ankles and one arm- thoroughly undignified, plus it showed off all the damage. Alzu padded over to the cliff nearby for just long enough to paint “RAPIST” in messy letters across it, using the blood all over his hands, then shook himself and scooped the pack up as he padded away. “Startin’ ta leak gut contents everywhere. C’mon- let’s get a river.”

 Churring in agreement, Almul followed Alzu and snagged a cloth from the pack to clean their hands off, quiet and satisfied. Okay. That… that had felt nice.

Maybe they could do this with the next target. It wasn’t as if the average rapist deserved any respect, after all- might as well use them for something helpful.