the-kryomancer

[the-kryomancer]

If you have a friend that wants to vent to you but doesn't want solutions but you are a solutions-oriented person, may I suggest Silly Solutions (TM)? For instance, whenever my friend complains about the people at her job being dumb, I remind her that if only one of us had studied engineering, we could create a giant hippo robot with laser eyes to destroy them. It fulfills my need to offer a solution, doesn't violate her boundary of not wanting to problem solve, AND it cheers us both up!

[the-kryomancer]

being on tumblr for a long time but never reading homestuck like

[the-kryomancer]

GOOD.

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[the-kryomancer]

[the-kryomancer]

Why are bad things happening to mutuals. Nothing bad should ever happen to mutuals. Stop. #ilovemymutuals

[the-kryomancer]

type prevs url with your eyes closed in the tags

[the-kryomancer]

[the-kryomancer]

Had my suspicions but I have finally confirmed it this morning: The rival Pokémon Go team I have been beefing with, whose gym's total annihilation I have incorporated into my morning routine, is actually a group of local elementary school students

[the-kryomancer]

I think grandpa has a new grandson

[the-kryomancer]

this guy posted this video called “unethical money making hacks” and was like “i’m selling bullshit art!” and he was buying prints from kmart and covering them in joint compound and making interesting shapes in the joint compound and then selling it as “textured wall art” like sorry bro that’s just regular art you made art i know it feels like bullshit but you’re actually just making art rn

[the-kryomancer]

Writing Commissions

My Ko-Fi

DM me on tumblr to discuss commission requests and pricing

Prices

500 word fic–$5

1,000 word fic–$10

2,000 word fic–$20

$5 added per additional 500 words

Prices are negotiable depending on word count.

I accept payment through Ko-fi only. I accept payment up front or upon completion of the commission

What I do Write

Fluff

Angst

Hurt/comfort

Gore (it depends)

Canon x Canon

OC x Canon

OC x OC

OT3’s

Canon x Reader

Self insert x canon

Self insert x OC

What I don’t Write

Pedophilia/Adults x minors

Dubcon or non-con

Yandere

Horror

Self harm/suicide

Real people/celebrities

Sonas of youtubers

Hate propaganda

This is a nonnegotiable. Do not try to get me to write something I’m not comfortable writing

Fandoms I write for

Marvel comics/MCU

DC/DCAU/DCEU

Arrowverse shows

Supernatural

Critical Role/DND

Overwatch

TF2

Star Trek (TAOS)

Star Wars

OUAT

Prison Break

Mission Impossible

Gotham

iZombie

Detroit Become Human

Arcane League of Legends

How to Train Your Dragon

BBC Merlin

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

God of War (4 & 5 only)

Bridgerton (Netflix version)

Netflix’s Ragnarok

ATLA/LOK

Stranger Things

Invincible (cartoon)

If a certain fandom is not up here that you want me to write for, just ask! I’m willing to do research!

Fandoms I do not write for

Five Nights at Freddy’s

American Horror Story

Creepypasta

Homestuck

Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel

Harry Potter franchise

Once I’ve written the fic and sent you the link and it’s been approved and paid for, I’m okay with you posting it as long as you credit me as the author since it is a commission. If you would like it posted by me to reblog I’m happy to do so

Slots Available

1,500 or less words Slot 1 [CLOSED]

1,500 or less words Slot 2 [OPEN]

1,500 or less words Slot 3 [OPEN]

1,500 or less words Slot 4 [OPEN]

1,500 or less words Slot 5 [OPEN]

2,000 words Slot 1 [OPEN]

2,000 words Slot 2 [OPEN]

2,000 words Slot 3 [OPEN]

2,500+ words Slot 1 [CLOSED]

2,500+ words Slot 2 [OPEN]

[the-kryomancer]

Being a little too cold: brrrr i’m a little too cold !!!

Being a little too warm: i am going to kill the next person who makes eye contact with me.

[the-kryomancer]

[the-kryomancer]

I've gone fifteen years on this website without absorbing any information about homestuck and I'm not about to start now

[the-kryomancer]

how it feels when one of your hyperfixations comes back and stronger than ever

[the-kryomancer]

"i hate spamlikers" "spamlikers dni!" "spamlikers are so annoying" "spamliking = blocked" SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUPPP MAYBE I JUST LIKE YOUR POSTS