#anyways legacies in stories make me sick

[nightmare-foundation]

There's something about superheroes and legacies that drive me absolutely NUTS, specifically with the imagery of looking at a suit behind glass

The imagery of a face juxtaposed over a suit. The weight of the world on your shoulders, whether it's new or if you're stepping into shoes previously filled, now empty. The weight of the world, the weight of that legacy. Bonus points if you didn't even want it. Maybe you did and you grew up and now you're not sure. Now you don't want it. But everyone's expecting it. Something something expectation of a legacy to strive toward and hollowness of a legacy unwanted

Anyways. I'm going to go throw up now

[wickmitz]

mitzi and mordecai are literally each other’s narrative counterpart : both serving the same purpose in a different way while being the figureheads for the lackadaisy and marigold plots respectively. they’re not similar, far from it, but their motivations are the same thing! they both loved atlas and are unable to cope with the vaccum his absence has created, the purpose they have lost, all aimless and suddenly desperate for familiarity … they are grief stricken and burdened with some sort of guilt about his death too. i say this all the time but had things been a little bit different i could 100% see mitzi turning to marigold to act as a spy while mordecai would desperately try to preserve atlas’s legacy -- all their actions are brash and impulsive and emotional and it’s an emotion that comes from the exact same tender little place. a lot of their tragedy ( to me anyway! ) is that they’re the only ones who could probably understand each other’s pain the best at this point, but are unable to do so because they’re too wrapped up in themselves to see past that. and they’ve always been volatile at best anyway. still, despite their harsh words, you can see that mordecai trusts mitzi to an extent, at least with this, with atlas, which is … a rather big deal to him. he seeks her opinion, he tells her about the oddities happening at marigold, defends her to gracie despite having ‘little interest’ in doing so … they still keep secrets, despire everything, ones they’ll take to the grave … they mirror one another so vividly in their pain how could they not trust each other so deeply? how could they not loathe one another? maybe it was easier to drift than it was to stay, being forced to stare at the visible ruination happening within, permanently etched on someone else’s face.

and if i said mitzi and mordecai are different sides of the same coin...

reddit won't like this one 🤭🤭🤭

[iid-smile]

can't get rid of me , fushiguro toji

a strong legacy to be left behind , chapter one

the series masterlist. | previous | next

cw: profanity, mentions of pregnancy (pills) but filtered for megumi's sake, mentions of violence in prison, you're broke, smoking cigarettes

author's note: sigh... im out of my fluff era 😞 (sorry guys) kinda wanted to write something that i think would actually happen in some sort of alternate jjk universe and um idk how far to go because this kind of stuff does happen in the manga, but writing it feels illegal??? idk...

"mom?" megumi peeks out from around the corner in the hallway. "who was calling?"

another groan escapes your lips, around the fifth one in the last three minutes, and you silence your phone once again. "your— excuse my language, shitty deadbeat dad keeps wanting to call me." you slap your hand across your forehead and lean back on the couch, a small creak coming from somewhere below. "apparently he's getting aggressive in prison. shut off the house phone, but they still found my number..."

your son comes closer to you, and you scoop him up, placing him by your side. he glances up at you, and you swear your fight or flight instincts nearly kicked in, (not that you'd be able to fight of a guy as big as toji anyways) flinching slightly from his sharp gaze. it sucks how he looks so much like his dad, because you loved megumi so much. but the image of that guy was almost too much to bear, and he's the spitting image.

"shitty?" he repeats. for a well-behaved kid, he really doesn't respect your words.

"don't say that megs, it's bad language." you swear around him all of the time, so what's the point in scolding him? "only your mama can say it."

"don't tell me what to do."

wow. okay. why do you feel threatened by a six year old? "damn, you've got his attitude too." you mutter, but you've only got yourself to blame for that. you knew you were never cut out to be a mother, so your ways of parenting weren't the best.

he snuggles closer to you, and you openly accept, moving your free hand to his hair to rub over it. "why can't i see toji?"

ah, this lovely story again. "because he left me as soon as you were born, love." really, you couldn't and didn't want to stop yourself from wrapping him up in your arms, feeling the need to protect him. "at this point, he's dead to me. seems like he doesn't feel the same though... i'm so sick of his ass." you also knew it wasn't good parenting to rant to your child about adult issues, but you've only got him to talk to.

that hug was out of comfort then. why are you lying to yourself?

he looks up at you with an irritatingly cute but blank face. "why?"

"god, i hate how many questions you ask." you speak under your breath once again, looking up at the ceiling from any sort of help from a higher being. the amount of times you've had to family-friendly-ify things that have happened isn't even funny. you're not naturally rated u for universal. it's more embarrassing when he recites those same stories to his teachers, and you get called into the school for a little talk.

yikes... here we go. "he lied when he said he gave me the right magical candy after we visited the stork. tried to make it drop you off back to where babies are made in heaven, but i wanted it to deliver you to me, whether he liked that or not." the story's got to be a little filtered somehow. you'd rather not get yourself in the principal's office again. "you're my little hero; a miracle to me. i would've given up on myself ages ago. your dad is a bad, bad man."

the type that would kill. if he found where you lived, or perhaps where megumi goes to school...

"and now i'm left broke in an apartment that barely functions, yet i still spoil my little hero." you sing-song, leaning your head back. "and with what money? i'm broke as hell, megs. can't even make both of us breakfast in the morning cuz your elementary school is too damn expensive."

"is this my fault?"

"...no. no, baby, of course not." you furrow your eyebrows more, a small pout in your lips. "if anything, you made my situation a bit more fortunate."

it's a selfish way of thinking, using your child to avoid solving your problems, using your child to wail and complain about how much you hate your life, but you've got nothing to lose. nothing to lose except for the one person you love.

you can feel your phone buzzing again.

"you stay here and watch tv, okay? mama's gonna go to the kitchen and talk to her friend." he seems a bit relieved as you let go of him, and you stand up.

you hear him mutter. "it's only playing the news though..." no shit it only plays the news, you can't afford to get a good television company that has any kids shows. that is, unless you wanna get scammed out of all of your money.

begrudgingly, you make your way to the kitchen, confirm that you closed the door completely, and answer the vibrating device. "hello?" you sigh, placing the device over your ear.

the other person on the call replies quickly. "is this miss—"

"yeah, yeah, it is. what the hell do you want?"

"um... we apologise, but we strongly suggest that you come to the prison building. he—" the guy's voice cracks. must be really nervous. "pardon me. he's been physically assaulting other inmates and guards, he doesn't follow orders, he never leaves his cell unless it's to visit the closed visits room. you know, in hopes that you'll come..."

obsessed much? where was this energy six years ago? "that's got nothing to do with me."

"please, ma'am. he won't listen to anyone, and we are unable to place him into special facilities as he doesn't emit any cursed energy." ah, he's begging? that's a first. you never would've thought you'd hear a person who works at a prison begging.

cursed energy, cursed energy, this talk again and again and again. "urgh..." you take a deep breath. your options are limited, and they won't stop calling until they can get that lunatic to calm down... surprise, surprise, you really don't want to go.

but if you were really uninterested in him, wouldn't you have already spent the bail money that's been sat on the counter for ages, neatly concealed in an envelope? wouldn't you have paid off all of your debts already? "will i— hm..." choose your words carefully, goddamn it. "can i get a reward of some sort if i go? money?"

"yes, yes! please do visit. there's nothing we can legally do to him in check anymore." ...you think this guy sounds a little too eager.

damn toji and his "supernatural powers", or else you wouldn't get yourself into this mess. finally, after your moment of silence, you respond. "okay. i'll visit."

"thank you—!" you cut off the line.

"fucking bastard..." you drop your phone on the counter, running your hands through your hair and over your face. "stressing me out for what? you don't even love me." your words turn into whispers. with haste, you rummage through your back pocket, trying to find those last few cigarettes, but as your hands were occupied, your eyes moved over to the ashtray that was collecting dust on top of the microwave. oh, right... you don't smoke anymore because there's no ventilation indoors.

you'd have to head out if you wanted to, but then megumi would be in the apartment on his own. and nobody can babysit, because you don't have anybody to ask to babysit. great, you can't smoke until monday. it's a friday afternoon. you have two whole days to get through!

you know for a fact your addiction won't hold out for that long.

[gyattoru]

SPOILERS FOR THE “IN THE SHADOW OF THE MOUNTAIN” QUEST OF HOGWARTS LEGACY DOWN BELOW 👇

So, I just finished this quest today and I REALLY had to write this ramble to get this off my mind.

The Hogwarts Legacy writing team really missed on Sebastian’s line after the last triptych quest by making his line “If not for me, than for Anne” instead of “If not for Anne, then for me.” because, let’s be honest:

All this time, us helping Seb find a cure was based on the fact that we were only helping because it mattered to him, he’s our friend and we don’t want to see our friend be hurt by the loss of his sibling, so why would he tell us to do it for Anne instead of him?

Also it would give him so much more depth, because to us he is a friend, but what about on his end? Does he fully consider us his friend or does he stick around because we conveniently have and ability that can help Anne, thus giving to him all he’s wanted since she got sick?

Anyways Portkey Games please hire me already for character story writing, thank you very much.

[worldsetfree]

Analysis: The Star (Part 6)

He's my favourite, oh my God I could ramble about this man. The character arc is chef's kiss. Will do proper headcanons another day.

Superman with a bad ending. Part 6 is a sad but fitting culmination of Kujo Jotaro's character arc.

The consequences of being distant and misunderstood combined with the burden of being "The Man" turn his life into a tragedy.

His anxiety has grown with his responsibilities. Look how his thoughts evolve from Part 3 to Part 6.

Divorce never happens for only one reason, but there are a few things shown in the story that make me raise my eyebrows.

Most obviously, I think the events of Part 4 scared him. He spent 10 years trying to live a normal life, didn't maintain his ability to stop time, and he almost died because of it.

"Stand Users attract Stand Users" - that and the effects that the arrows had on Morioh are enough to give anyone pause.

Jotaro is a protector first and foremost. He absolutely felt compelled to chase down the remnants of DIO's legacy to keep his family safe.

He also had a child VERY young, and that's stressful on a relationship no matter how much you love them. Recall that Jolyne is born only 3-4 years after the end of Stardust Crusaders.

But we know he loves Jolyne deeply and probably never wanted her to get mixed up in all of the Stand mess. He never wanted to get involved in this himself, remember?

The greatest gift he could give his daughter is the peaceful life he never had. That's all any parent wants for their child.

He probably had some awareness of Pucci's activity (though likely not his identity), but didn't put it together until it was too late.

Jotaro wasn't expecting to wake up after his encounter with White Snake. 100% was furious with Jolyne for putting herself in danger like that.

He's not proud of her at all for this stupidity, damn it.

I am soooo sick of the "lol Jotaro got nerfed why was he so dumb" rhetoric around the final fight.

In the end, he makes the same choice he's always made: to defend his loved ones because that's who he's always been. Pucci knew that, too.

And let's be real, Made in Heaven is a horrible matchup for Star Platinum.

Jotaro is among the most controversial of Joestars, and I get it, but I adore his complexities. He's a flawed hero, and he bears the heaviest burdens of the Joestars.

Like many, I wanted Part 6 to have a happy ending, but I loved it anyway. In the Ireneverse, he's still Jotaro. But without Pucci around to carry DIO's legacy, I hope he got the peaceful life he wanted.

Feedback and discussion always welcome. :)

[weekend-whip]

Ninjago Fic Rec Week: Day 4

Prompts: Fluff / Cole Recs! (i'm sure I'll be seeing a lot of my favorite fics today aaaa)

Fluff Recs-

Good Hair Day: Kai helps Skylor do her hair, based entirely on a headcanon of Kai being good at doing hair (hey, his own style is a choice)

Little Brother: Lloyd realizes the perks of having five older siblings. Lots of sweet family fluff and young!Lloyd shenanigans <3

Nya, Kai, and That One Drink: Including this one specifically because it's probably the most lighthearted thing I've written yet that doesn't involve Jesse snknksnskn, the group goes for takeout in the X-1 Ninja Charger, only for one thing to lead to another and Kai winds up forgetting Nya's drink. What's a brother to do now?

Socks: Wu wearily but delightfully is forced to watch the ninja get way too much merriment out of a ridiculous pair of socks (I, personally, am of the belief that they belong to Lloyd, but—)

Five Times Jay Cheered Someone Up: And the one time he was cheered up in return (i am DISTRESSED that i didn't include this on my Jay list aaaaAAAA)

Five Times Lloyd Was a Pain: And the one time he wasn't. Child!Lloyd for the soul in this one!!!!

There's Insurance For That: In which Skylor gets a taste of the life of a ninja (and learning just how many places they've been banned from in Ninjago) Quite possibly my favorite lighthearted Skylor fic!!!

Cole Recs-

Sick Days: Sickfic, featuring Cole and having to contend with "Being useless", and the doting care

Passing On the Hammer: Cole has a meeting with his grandfather, while Jay tries his hand at being a fisherman and Kai thinks he can do the Triple Tiger Sashay. (Really a fic about Cole and his family's legacy, but Kai and Jay's antics are too hilarious not to mention snksnknksnk)

You're An Excellent Chef, Really *screams loudly* UGNH one of my very favorite fics exploring Cole and Zane's dynamic, will recommend every single time!!!! But, it's basically the duo bonding over cooking over the years. Makes my heart very happy <3

Quiet Weirdo: Cole and Nya friendship fic that the world definitely needs more of!!!!

Adjusting: PILOT BONDING, this time Cole flavored!! Cole's thoughts on his new budding team consisting of a chatty blue guy and the guy that won't stop staring at things. But a guy like Cole has never needed friends anyway, so he's got nothing to worry about, right?

Again and Again: MORE PILOTS BONDING but this time with Glacier! People keep asking me how Cole fell in love with Zane in Legacyverse and my mind always drifts back to a thing similar to this story! My personal investment aside, a nice fluffy fic about how Cole met Zane and they became friends with a touch of pining <3

You Worry Too Much: By the author of Chips and Salsa (another fandom Cole/Glacier classic), here we have a another tale centered around Cole's parents while he was growing up, and though it's a little more about Lou than anyone else, Cole ofc has a huge stake in the story and uwaah I love reading about Cole's family dynamics (both the fluff and the tragedy)

Some Climb Mountains: A retelling of how Cole met Master Wu, always gets me misty eyed because i am a soft soul ;v;

Cole and the Tastiest Broken Glass: S2 Pre-Child's Play, Cole and Lloyd bond over broken things, life philosophy, and candy. Cole and Lloyd sibling duo that the world also needs much more og!!

I'm Sure He Knows: More Cole + Wu bonding that speaks to me specifically, involving a conversation about a certain ghostly wind master who is no more.

Four Times Cole Helped The Guys With a Nightmare: And the one time they helped him. Cole's character at his purest in this one!!!

[misguidedasgardian]

The Lifeaters (III.1)

I. Something's in the air

MASTERLIST

Chapter Summary: You are excited to return to school… so many changes though

Pairings: Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader (platonic)

Warnings: Cursing, magical objects, Mugglephobia, classism, charms and curses, reader is referred to as “little girl” and others, implied menstrual blood (sorry, it’s important for the story), UNCLE LUCIUS EXPLAINING POORLY TO DRACO WOMAN’S GROWTH, please don’t cancel me, I think its funny, might miss some warnings (this will be the only chapter discussing these things, sorry if it makes you uncomfortable)

Wordcount: 3 k

Notes: Like I say in the warnings, it's just a few paragraphs, I wanted to use that to say that the reader is growing and “maturing” and this year at school a line began to be drawn, her first real crush and all of that… anyways…

You smiled as you felt your aunt’s soft hands on your hair, she was looking down at you with those eyes so much like yours, with a strange proudness shining in them

“My little girl is not so little anymore”, she whispered sweetly, “you are almost a woman grown, a little lady of thirteen”

“I feel like one”, you contributed softly with a shy smile, your lower belly burned like hell

She smiled at you, and presented you with a small wooden box, you took it gently in your hands, and opened it quickly, revealing a silver ring, with Slytherin’s snake carved into the metal

“For you my love”, she said proudly, you looked at her wide eyed

“This is for me?”, you asked, it was gorgeous 

“It was your father’s”, she said carefully, you gasped

“What? how?”, you had so many questions, “Why? HOW?”, you were so excited she only giggled 

“You know you are the only second generation on our end, but this is a legacy ring”, she explained softly, “your mother had it, he had gifted it to her, it is said to have been in his family for quite some time, he was a Slytherin legacy”, she said softly, “and you are becoming one”, she murmured

“Thank you aunt”, you said softly, placing the ring in your finger, as soon as you accommodate it, it shrunk a bit to fit you perfectly, as magic rings usually did

“My father’s ring”, you whispered, looking at its perfect carving

“One day, I will talk to you about your father, I promise”, she said, smiling, “I know he would have been very proud of you, his young woman, a quidditch chaser”, she stood up and prepared to leave, but you stopped her, ready to ask her a question

“Can I go to the Malfoys for the weekend before school starts?”, you asked hopefully, and when your aunt smiled sadly at you, you frowned

“You are a woman now”, she said severely but softly, “it is inappropriate for you to sleepover with a young man”, she resolved, your eyes filled with tears

It was all different now

“Maybe I can stay in a guest room”, you suggested, “there are going to be more people there…”

“Why don’t you get in touch with the Parkinson girl, uh?”, she suggested, “we can go to Diagon Alley with her, and her mother, a girl’s day, wouldn’t that be nice?”, you nodded

“But can I still go to Malfoy Manor? Draco is going to be disappointed if I don’t”, you suggested, because you knew how your aunt was against “disappointing” the Malfoys

“Yes, I’ll speak to Narcissa”, she said softly, and let the matter settle, “I’ll brew you the potion, for your pains”, she said with a soft smile, and left you alone. There is so much things she relied on servants and house shelves for, but self-care wasn’t one of them, after all, your family’s fortune came from skin products, and your aunt was very good at brewing potions and creams

You sighed, feeling like you were somewhat sick, but you weren’t, right?. You sat on the edge of your bed.

Even though you felt a sharp pain you didn’t feel any different, you wondered if Draco was going to be acting differently towards you too? you doubted it 

You thought of Pansy, how nice she was and how you were actually thinking it was a great idea to go with her to Diagon Alley, to shop for your things for the new school year

So you did, you wrote hastily, asking her ho she’d been, what were her plans for next week, and if she would like to “hang”, to go to Diagon Alley with her, and you actually took the opportunity and asked her if she would like to spend the night afterwards in your home

Umbra went and came back with an answer the same day, which meant she had answered pretty quickly

“Dear (y/n), good timing you had because you see, I’m in need of a new pair of EVERYTHING for the new term! and would LOVE to hang out with you, can’t wait to see this season’s new shoe collection at Cobbler's fancies, see you Wednesday at 12 in front of Flourish and Blotts! and then of course I would love to go back to your house with you!”

Wednesday arrived pretty quickly and soon you were walking down Diagon Alley, alone! for the very first time! Pansy was there, just in time, smiled and waved at you when she saw you. You aunt was going to meet you, but like at five to have some tea, in the rumanian tea shop, she had given you a handsome bag of galleons to spend, so happy you got to go on a shopping spree with a friend, she went a bit overboard and told you to buy whatever you wanted, not only needed 

“Hey Basilik!”, she greeted cheerfully, hugging into you tightly

“Hey Parkinson!”, you teased back, it was nice to hang around with a girl-friend  

She grabbed your hand and led you down the street

“I need to buy some shoes!”, she said decisively, “and you too!”, she led you to the most famous shoe shop in London, “Cobbler’s fancies”, with the most delicately made shoes and boots, made from all kind of authentic magical leathers

You naturally turned to the most… flat, classic shoes, but Pansy only shook her head and led you to the back, to the woman’s shoes

“We are in our third year already!”, she said, “we need to get something more… Stylized”, she said, “like this!”, she gave you a low cane black boot that had a bit of heel, “gorgeous!”, it was very pretty, but you never thought you’d be wearing something like that for school, “go on! try them”

You indulged her, trying them on

“Your legs look great!”, she said, and you looked at her in terror, and then looking down again

“M-my legs?”, you asked her. It had never occurred to you that shoes had something to do with your legs 

“A bit of heel will made your legs look thinner!”, she explained, you walked around the shop a bit, and they were comfortable, you looked back at the window and you tried to imagine what they would look like with the uniform skirt on

“Should I get them?”, you asked her, who just had picked a Mary jane shoe with a thick high heel 

“YES!”, she insisted, trying her on her own shoe, which she also bought

“Fine Dragon skin leather!”, said the witch that minded the shop, and Pansy looked extremely happy, and you were too

“Now! new bags for our books!”, she said grabbing your hand and walking down the street

You got gorgeous new matching leather bags for your books, hers in black and yours in your favorite color, and you grew more excitedly each passing second. 

It was a fun day, giggling and gossiping with Pansy and you entered every store you could, getting yourself two entire new outfits to visit Hogsmeade, and winter matching hats, scarves and gloves. 

And then when you had the time… you went to get your school supplies…

“Is little sweet (y/n) joining us?”, Lucius asked, and by the look on his son’s face he already knew what the answer was going to be, as they both walked down Diagon Alley 

“No she isn’t”, he grumbled, “she told me she was hanging out with that Parkinson girl”, he said, and Lucius chuckled, “what?”

“What you need to understand Draco, is that when women are… growing… they reach a certain age, they can experience changes and alongside that… mood swings, she can become a bit… aggressive…”, he said softly, “they will tend to their own kind”

“own kind?”, he asked

“Other witches”, he continued, “they will hang in groups of only women, and they will form a coven, they become vicious creatures”, he started rambling, looking ahead of him down the road as Draco followed him, frowning, not understanding where this was going.

“what!?”, he asked, concerned, Lucius stopped his movements and grabbed his shoulder, “vicious?”

“There is a reason sirens and mermaids are only women”, he said frowning deeply, grabbing into his shoulders

“I don’t understand”, were you going to turn into a man-eating winged woman? Lucius seemed to think about it, looking at the horizon

“But don’t worry, she will grow out of it…”

“When?”, he asked

“A couple of years”

“YEARS!?”, he asked back, now terrified. Narcissa showed up then, with a frown on her face

“Lucius! don’t you dare!”, she threatened. Lucius whimpered in fear and started walking hastily ahead of them both

“Don’t listen to him”, she said severely, Draco, now in fear of his own mother, nodded quickly, “you are still the same two you had always been, you are just growing”, Narcissa said and leaned in and kissed him in the forehead, “I will advice, though, to always hang into a couple of chocolate frogs in your bag”

“As a tribute, I understand”, he said firmly, accepting this new “challenge”, Narcissa looked at him fondly and kept walking with him

Draco got his things in the company of his parents, indeed missing you, thinking time and again about what his father had said 

Were you really going to turn into a man eating striga? 

But then, as the sun was hiding through the streets, he walked by the Rumanian tea shop, and when he catches a glimpse of you, you were standing up to meet him

“Draco!”, you said, so excited, its only been a month since he last saw you, you looked pretty much the same, not, correction, you looked better

He knew everything was going to be as good as always

You hugged him tightly hiding your face on his neck

“Miss you!”, you said quickly

He greeted Parkinson with not the same enthusiasm 

“I see that you had fun!”, said Narcissa with a smile, “can you show me what you girls bought?”, she asked excitedly

Lucius joined too, as Cercille did, and as all the girls were giggling, gossiping and talking about their shopping man, Draco noticed how his father’s hands were trembling, grabbing into his walking stick, when they met their eyes, he whispered something like

“Don’t worry, everything is going to be alright”, as he seemed like he was going to be sick. Draco only laughed 

“What are you doing?”, you giggled, as Draco kept looking and palming your back for wings

“Nothing”, he said quickly releasing you, you saw his hand.

“So, you got yours”, he admired, grabbing your hand softly in his, admiring the ring, he was wearing the exact same one

“And you got yours!”, you teased, wanting to see his ring, your fingers with his intertwining playfully

“Was it your aunt’s?”, he asked, and you shook your head

“My father’s actually”, you said, and he looked at you wide-eyed

“Did she finally tell you?”, he asked

“No but she promised she was going to”, you said, and he nodded, “do you think your parents know?”

“I think they do”, he said and you thought bitterly that if they didn’t they probably wouldn’t let Draco hang around with you like they did

Whoever your father was, he must have been really important 

You often wondered the reason they didn’t want to tell you, it was because maybe he wasn’t dead at all. What if he was locked up in Azkaban for committing terrible crimes? What if he was a follower of you know who and got locked up?

You honestly were scared to find out.

“Have you seen that a prisoner of Azkaban escaped?”, he asked, you indeed had seen the page this morning in the daily prophet

“Yes”

“They say he murdered 13 muggles with only one curse!”, he almost admired

“He looks dangerous, and crazy, you should have seen my aunt’s face this morning when she saw the paper”, you said

“Is she concerned?”, he asked, frowning

“A bit, she wouldn’t say though”

“Well, he is a murderous lunatic and he is free somewhere”, he conceded

“They will catch him, right? the Azkaban guards?”

“Of course they will, have you seen those things?”

“They are terrifying”, you whispered

You were hanging out in the “informal” living room in the manor, as Cercille, uncle Lucius and Narcissa were having tea in the library

“Let’s go steal some pastries from our parents”, he said standing up, you followed him and almost trotted to the library, but before you barged in, he grabbed your hand to stop you, as they were talking and by their tone, it was serious.

“Do you think he knows?”, you heard your aunt ask, she was pretending to be calm, but you could tell she wasn’t

“There is no way to know”, said Lucius

“He didn’t”, confessed Narcissa, “I’m certain he didn’t, he was estranged for years”

“We don’t need to worry, he won’t get near us…”

You shared concerned looks, it was juicy

“Draco!”, called uncle Lucius angrily, with a flick of his walking stick the doors opened wide, exposing you to the three adults. They all looked like your crushed their party

“Join us for pastries dear”, said Narcissa with a soft smile

They completely changed the subject when you joined them, talking trash about Dumbledore and about the coming school year. 

You knew for Lucius to be a delicate subject, as he had been “relieved” from his duties as a governor for the school.

“Let’s see the character he is going to bring in this year to be our teacher against the dark arts”, whispered Draco, and for once you were truly concerned

“They should put in Snape already”, conceded 

You catched Narcissa looking at you fondly, and then at Draco

“You are staying dear?”, she asked softly, “we still have the party tomorrow”

“Yes I will”, you said softly, looking at your aunt, who nodded with a smile.

You spend the rest of the day chatting with your parents.

And before you knew it, you were in the platform 9 ¾ , your aunt fixing your jacket you picked for the journey

“I’m so proud of you, did you know that?”, she whispered, smiling at you

“Thank you”

“Do great this year, alright?”, she said, “follow the rules, don’t get into too much trouble… keep your friends close”

“And your enemies closer?”, you mocked, she faked a laugh

“I’m serious, please”

“yes”, you answered quickly, she cradled your face in her hands, caressing the apple of your cheeks with her thumbs

“You looked like your mother”, she whispered

“Do I also look like my dad?”, you asked her, and she smiled

“You got the devil in your eyes kid, that’s all him”, she answered with a smile 

With a last hug, you grabbed Umbra and climbed the steps inside the train

Draco, Pansy, Matthew, Greg and Vince got a compartment for yourselves, it was a bit crowned, but you were having fun talking about all the things that you were going to do

“I signed up for Care of magical creatures and divination!”, you said contently

“Me too!”, said Draco

“Nobody took muggle studies?”, asked Matthew, and you all laughed like he had cracked the best joke of the centuries 

The day outside was ghastly, it soon started to rain, the droplets hitting the window loudly 

“Heard about Sirius Black?”, asked Matthew

“he escaped from Azkaban, the ministry is concerned he will get to Potter”, said Pansy, and you all looked at her wide-eyed, her father worked for the ministry

“i thought this was the Hogwarts Express, not the Potter express”, you mocked

“And why would he go after Potter?”, asked Draco, now certainly interested

“Well, he was a big supporter of the Dark Lord, and Potter is on the way of him returning to his glory”, said Matthew

“So Sirius Black is on the hunt for Potter?”, you asked, “oh merlin, so the nutter will try to get inside Hogwarts, won’t he?”

“Maybe finally we can get rid of Potter”, said Malfoy with a wicked smile

Suddenly the train stopped suddenly, everyone jumping on their seats

“Merlin’s beard!”

“What was that?”

Matthew looked through the window

“There is something out there”, he said. The lights flickered and eventually, you were in the dark, illuminated barely by the stormy cloud outside 

The entire compartment moved, like something heavy had just come aboard, Matthew jumped from his seat and locked the compartment door. 

The entire window froze, the entire room temperature, even though there were six of you, dropped almost to the minus ceros. 

“What’s happening?”, you asked, hugging yourself 

You gasped when you saw it, passing by the door and window of your compartment

It was big and cloaked, and when you tried to look at its face, a shiver ran through you, like you were watching something that didn't belonged to this world, like everything was misery and you were never going to feel happiness again

That thing turned around, looked at you through the windows, tried the door, and then he kept going.

“Is that…?”, Pansy asked

“A dementor”, Matthew completed 

All the cheerfulness of the ride disappeared, and even though that the train was moving ten minutes later, you all just sat there, wide-eyed, not being able to say anything else.

[mostlymaudlin]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers 💫

thank you @decaflondonfog for the tag !! ill tag @sillyunicorn @starwarned @urban-sith @tea-brigade

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

98!! (woah) plus an unrevealed t&n fest fic, so 99. wow i need to do something rly crazy for 100 lol. what if i do a ridiculous crossover of all my fandoms and everyone in the fandom tags will hate me. 

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

544,914. (again. woagh)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

mostly all for the game and simon snow series, have dabbled in & posted even less for check please, captain america, and one direction! i feel like i’m missing something but regardless my fixations are hardcore, so all except like 4k of that posted wc is for either aftg or ss hahahha

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

all are andreil! boyfriend privileges (4k, T) / Trigger (62k, E) / flashes of intimacy (10k, t) / Would you still love me if I was a worm? (6k, T) / Inside Thoughts (1k,T)

man this is long, rest is going under the cut lol

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

not very often, but i wish i did. i am stricken with a combination of being really awkward when people are nice to me & being bad at interacting with anyone in ways i fear could be perceived as ingenuine. im not sure if that makes sense LMAO. and sometimes when i put a story out, i kind of feel like i’ve said my piece — i’ve put so much into it that i don’t really know what else to say!

anyway, i always reply to questions, because that’s got clear social boundaries hahaha, and i DO love talking abt my stories!! and sometimes i’ll reply to comments that really get me thinking. but yeah, i know i reply less than i could, and i want to like double down on the fact that i am endlessly grateful for everyone who has ever left a comment on my work <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i have killed simon snow twice lmfao. i’d actually classify icarus as rather hopeful — it’s about grief & healing. but legacies is just fucked up lmfao

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

oh man, i write a lot of happy endings haha. i feel like even when my story is tonally darker (rare), it still has a happy or at least hopeful ending. this is probably not the correct answer, but i think sing of the moon has a really vividly happy ending. like — the sun rises for the first time in the whole fic! amazing. or maybe my high school au, We Can Live Forever, which is just the happiest thing i’ve ever written. 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not really, thankfully! people are smartasses sometimes but overall ive been lucky. there have been a couple of fics where ive winced before hitting post, but it usually ends up fine

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yessss. i guess i mostly write tender smut, bc i write tender things in general. i think my smut tends to be rather exploratory/playful as well? intentionally sloppy and awkward choreography hahaha

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

sort of LOL. once upon a time i was betaing @tea-brigade's medieval snowbaz au, Reliquary of an Arsonist, and there’s this part where three highway bandits mug simon and baz and then get blasted by simon’s chosen one magic. i am sick in the head so im in the google doc like “lol what if its kandreil.” and then i was like… what if it was kandreil….. and so i wrote Reliquary of a Bandit

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don’t think so

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!!! and i’m really thankful for everyone who has done so <3333 shoutout to russian aftg translators, yall go HARD

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i recently collaborated with @thewholelemon on our episode of Star Trek: Redemption, Heart-Shaped Box. by which i mean: i wrote the outline & a few scenes, got really overwhelmed, and jenny turned it into something worth reading! 

i also wrote Good Boy in the snowbaz stoner verse with @starwarned, which was rly fun — we sat in the google doc for like, 5 hours trading back and forth on POVs as we wrote pure porn together LOL. it’s funny to think about this, because lauren knows like everything abt me now but we did not know each other as well back then!!! and we were just like “yeah lets write porn together” hahahahha 

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

right now it is deeefinitely andreil… they are everything to me for reasons i just cannot possibly be brief about LOL so ill just leave it at that

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i have a postcanon snowbaz time travel/time loop wip that i was going to try to write for COBB this year but i fucked up the deadlines then the brainrot was like “guess that means more andreil !”. i did SO MUCH research for it and i think it’s rather clever and smutty and fun bc they are yeeted back to watford era! but it’s also dealing with snowbaz, who are in their late 20s and are like in a relationship low point/actively fighting when they end up in the loop… so they are dealing with that tension at the same time as they are trying to get out of the loop. and also fucking around watford to fulfill fantasies HAHAHA

16. What are your writing strengths?

characterization is the thing i care most about! and i think that’s the draw of fanfic in particular to me — i love getting such a grasp on a character that i can translate them into endless situations while still making them feel true to self. i rarely let myself publish anything until i can read through the whole thing without any he would not fucking say that moments hahahha. this is of course pertaining to my own interpretations of the characters, which is the only thing i care abt lmfao

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i rely a lot on body language because im always writing abt reticent fuckers who cant use their words. but i think i sometimes overcompensate, or describe actions that don't actually fit the scene. i've seen this described as "cheek-biting" -- like, throwing in action during a conversation just to delay the pacing/further the tone, but when you really look at it, it's not necessary. (cheek-biting being like, "character bites at their cheek" in the middle of a tense conversation)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don’t really know any other languages! i think i’ve put a little bit of french in neil/kevin/baz POVs before, but my french knowledge is elementary at best. love the idea of it though.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

one direction babyyyyyyyy !! i wrote quite a bit of it in like 2012-2015 but published very little. there’s 1 on my ao3, some lost somewhere on fanfiction.net (i dont rmr my username lol), and tons in my folders from my old laptop lol.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

hmmmmm. im gonna cheat bc i cant pick a single favorite. i always say i think No Turning Back is some of my best writing from a craft standpoint, and it also includes my favorite type of conflict (andrew self-destructing lol). however, i reread both that fic & We Can Live Forever on a plane trip recently after not having touched either for 6+ months — and the solidness of We Can Live Forever actually surprised me, especially because i wrote the majority of that fic while i was stoned and also view it as just exceedingly silly. the world of it is just very rich, and also very very different from the typical character backstories, and i’m very proud of how much that reread played with my heartstrings.  

ok last one — there are several installments of my flashes of intimacy series that i come back to a lot, because i’m proud of what they each accomplish in 500 words. especially because i often turn to those when im trying to express my own emotions lol. specifically, my favorites are picking fights, i don’t mind, swimming lessons, and practicing gratitude.

that was such a bullshit and cocky way to answer this lmfaooooo. but tbh i am my own biggest fan and that is by design — i write stuff so that i can reread it months later and have it be perfectly catered to my tastes. i love all my fics <3

[thotsforvillainrights]

Washa washa!!

Your probably sick of stain but is there a way you could make a one shot of dad stain? 😅 there’s just something about a intimidating brute of a man who probably scares everyone with a small little girl that’s a ball of sunshine

(Sick of Stain? No, not even close! Sick of Wash however? That is a different story...stupid laundry appliance😒)

~Dad!Stain & Daughter Day~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

"Already that time again? Can't be right. Go check the calendar and get back with me." He grumbled while sharpening the blade of his oldest sword. You sighed and tapped the calender on the wall next to the light switch. He paused his actions and looked at it, squinting to get a better view of the dates.

The 28th...

"Ugh, fine then." Although he seemed to be bothered by it, it was HIM that set this day up every month. To combat the worry of not being present enough in his child's life, he made sure to set one day a month aside to spend the entire day with her. He'd called it 'daughter day' and was adamant on sticking to it...even when it sometimes came at an inconvenient time. Don't get him wrong! Of course he spent plenty of days in the month with her and you, but it helped to have one day set aside in case things had gotten hectic for him.

You smile as he put the sword aside before you place a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry about it. She's older now so I know it should be okay right?" He looks around the room in worry and then back at you. Of course you flashed a reassuring smile before hearing small steps scurry down the hall. You stepped to the side to reveal a very sleepy but excited little girl. "Daddy daughter?" She yawned out while rubbing the remaining sleep from her eyes. He nods and pushed his blade to the side, opening his arms and smiling softly to himself when she ran into him. After witnessing a nice morning hug, you headed to the kitchen to heat up the only thing your toddler was interested in eating right now: pancakes. Meanwhile, Chizome was taking an important step in parenthood by finally explaining why the hell he has all the 'shiny sharps' on the wall (as his daughter would call it). He sat her in his lap and carefully brought his blade close enough for her to see it. He made sure to have the sharp side turned down toward the floor in case her wandering hands decided to touch.

"This ahem...shiny sharp...is my most important one. This is the one that I've had for a very long time."

She stares in awe at the blade with her widened eyes. "Even longer than me, daddy?" He chuckles at her question and smiles. "Yes, even longer than you. To be clear here, this is actually called a sword. They all are...well most of them anyway. The smaller ones are called knives. There are many different type of knives by the way. The one over there on the wall is neither as it is classified as a machete. I'll go into more detail when you're older."

"Can I have a sword one day like you?" He paused at the question and took a second to think. Getting a 4 year old a butterfly knife would be so bad if he taught her how to use it right? He was taking it into consideration until he heard you clear your throat at the doorway. "When you're older...much older." You winked before holding down the large plate in your hands for her to see what was on it. "PANKCAKES!" She shouted, zipping past you to head into the kitchen and sit at the table. "Come eat some breakfast with us, hmm?" You ushered for him to follow along. He nodded and carefully put the blade away, still buzzing with silent excitement at the thought of explaining more to his little girl. Hopefully she'd take a liking to them. It would make passing on his legacy much easier when the time someday came. But for now, it would be a cozy morning with pancakes and a chat about some particular 'shiny sharps'.

[hella1975]

hmmm consumption as the ultimate form of devotion but ‘am I making you feel sick?’ the fact that it could be about dying and her only consideration is if she tasted good OR she’s dead and it’s the only act of revenge she can get. she’s dead now she has nothing but she made him ill. that’s it that’s her legacy: a polaroid in evidence and making isaiah sick. the emotion in her voice when she asks ‘am I no good?’ because after all this, 76 minutes and 13 songs, after being drugged and murdered and eaten, that’s what her story is down to: the human desire to be good. and it killed her. she tried to be good and she died for it. anyway tell me about this tragic villain failed by his family hella

oh he's just some guy that was born with the sole purpose of fulfilling his father's wish of becoming the number 1 hero and beating his dad's nemesis and his dad spent his formative years instilling that idea into his head and 'training' (abusing) him to be a fighter and a hero and never once letting him be a kid but he didn't have the right ability for it because he burned on his own flames so when his younger brother was born with the perfect ability he was just thrown aside and his father never bothered with him again like all of that pain and false love never meant a thing and it drove him to the brink of burning himself alive and coming back with his skin barely held together by staples some atrophied, monsterous villain and he made it his life's wish to kill his father for turning him into something so ugly and in his own hatred he destroyed himself enough that even his siblings became subject to his fury despite also being victims of their father and he's one of the main villains of the entire show but he was literally just a child who wanted to be good

[keeperofthesunandmoon]

Hey, anon who was asking about sending feedback here. Doing it not anon this time just to make any replies needed easier. Apologies in advance for the wall of text, I've tried to condense it, but I'm not the best at being concise. Also sorry if any of this has been brought up before.

First a couple technical issues I encountered. In chapter 7 I got the part about my mom taking care of me while sick, even though my parents were killed last chapter, then inversely when I went through again and saved them the dialogue option "“All my goodness died when he took my parents.” was available to choose.

Anyway onto the juicy stuff. So for the most part, I really liked the game so far, I thought it is a really good continuation of the story, and I'm definitely excited for more. But I obviously do have some notes, so here they are.

1) Being able to detect heartbeats isn't actually an accurate way of detecting bluffs (or lies in general). Heartrate raises if a person is excited or scared, and a good liar would be calm while lying. Plus with poker specifically, knowing your opponent is bluffing is only part of the equation, you still have to have a good hand, or be able to bluff yourself.

2) I feel like there should be the option to be opposed to control magic due to trauma rather than just general moral opposition, depending on the choices made. Like, at the very least, any MC unfortunate enough to have Julian Anderson as their birth father, probably has more reason to be averse to control magic than just "mind control bad cause it takes away free will".

On the same note, there are multiple instances where without player input, your character either uses control magic, considers using it, or sits there while someone else casually uses it. Which like, even trauma aside, if I’ve been picking all the “I think control magic is morally evil” options it seems weird my character would just casually use it to make someone forget a conversation, or be fine with their friends using it to get past airport security.

It also kinda sucks, for the above reasons, that in regards to the screening, your only options are let someone use control magic on you (whether or not you resist) or compel them first. Like I said, I feel like my MC would be very traumatized by the whole concept of control magic, and would very much not be on board with either of these options.

3) The jar of holy oil felt a bit like it came out of nowhere. Like I previously got the impression that holy oil was pretty hard to get your hands on, even for someone with the MCs connections, but then you just like have a jar of it in your bag I guess, no real explanation as to how it got there. Also IDK if this was intentional misdirection or not, so sorry in advance if it is, but because it’s first mentioned as an “unbreakable jam jar” directly after talking about the homemade snow globes (which are often made from jars), I thought the jam jar was the snow globe, up until you actually use it.

4)This one’s kind of a legacy issue from the previous games, so IDK how fixable it is at this point, but basically the game feels like it's in an odd situation when it comes to the MC, that I can best describe as being nonbinary inclusive, but trans exclusive. The game lets you choose the name/pronouns you want, but then the flashbacks just assume your character was still using the same ones back when they were a toddler (obviously there are people irl who do come out at a pretty young age, but, at least in my experience, that's the exception rather than the rule). Like obviously something to account for that could be added, but IDK if you can like update already published games, and if not adding it to the third game would probably introduce some weirdness, so IDK.

5) I’m confused as to what a “stereotypical drakaina” would be cause like a drakaina isn’t really like a thing in pop culture the same way something like angels and demons are, and the word itself is literally just the feminine form of the Ancient Greek word for dragon or serpent. Would it just be dressing up as a dragon? I realize this one's pretty nitpicky, I’m just confused.

6) In the dream sequence in chapter 8, the game seems to just like assume the MC and RO are able to have a biological kid together. I know that both it’s a dream sequence and also a setting with magic, so it’s not really a plot hole or anything per say, but I think taking that into mind, and maybe adding some text for situations where that might be in question, to explain that would be a good idea.

7) "…for the fact that the worst crime they’ve ever committed is jaywalking." I’m fairly certain forging a birth certificate is also a crime. /s

Thank you for the feedback! I've made some edits to earlier chapters based on it for next update

[wigglesforonce]

thank u for the tag keeb @vroombeams <3

Who is your favorite driver? Toss up between George and Oscar, depending on the day, vibes, and how many posts from Mark or Rosie i have recently read

Do you have other favorite drivers? i am known to enjoy logan-posting, and i always cheer for yuki points!! ill also say alex and lewis are up there

Who is your least favorite driver? obvious question to anyone who asks me. verstappen #1 (im enough of a hater to not realise that mv00 was meant as an insult as his championship, and not just what ppl would write to avoid using his name), and i am a respectful hater for norris, i keep it to myself and a specific whatsapp chat w someone

Do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well? i am more of a fan of drivers than teams, but i do appreciate the legacies and histories of the constructors on the grid, as well as the camradery of everyone on track! love watching teams celebrate wins/points etc together

If you like teams, what team do you pull for? i am a fan of the more historical side of f1, so i am nostalgic for williams (even tho i wasnt even watching and/or alive lmao), but i will say if i buy official team merch it'll probably be merc stuff

How long have you been into F1? i've always been vaguely aware of it, but i first rly learnt abt it mid 2021, and then the first race i watched live was COTA 2021 (rip why did i miss half the best season ever for like 0 reason)

What got you into F1? if we're being hyperspecific, the trailer for DTS that had grosjean's crash from Bahrain 2020 - i decided to watch Telly during a holiday in like. march, and was scrolling netflix and saw a massive explosion and went 'oh SICK', and accidentally watched all of that season of DTS in one day. i then spent the next like 2 months just watching youtube videos abt f1 and went 'no i cant be obsessed w cars going around in circles' and voila. we're here

Do you enjoy Fanfic/RPF? as with the way i enjoy any piece of media, i read fanfiction before actually consuming the source material, so to answer the question: yes (i've stopped reading it much nowadays, just a few stories ive been long time subbed to cough jeddah george cough)

How do you view new fans? love to chat w them, and figure out how much they know! (in a fun 'omg ur into my fav topic' kind of way, not a 'list every race winner since 1950' kind of way). i was a new fan rather recently, so i remind myself of that whenever i eyeroll at a bad take on twitter.

If you could take over as team principal for any team, who would it be and why? redbull and sabotage the Hell out of the team. also earn some nice cash at the same time.

Are your friends and family into F1 as well? it took me a year and a half of being into f1 to find out that not only did my mum used to watch f1 in the 80s/90s, that my grandfather used to watch f1 WITH her but my UNCLE on the OTHER side of the FAMILY has a SIGNED AUTOGRAPH from SENNA that was sent off like a week before he DIED. i thought i was ALONE in my enjoyment GENUINELY.

i also got many of my friends into f1, and have made new friends both irl and online through shared love of it, so u know. Skillz.

Are you open to talking to other fans/making friends? uh ALWAYS. as i just said, i have made many a friend this way, and its just fun to talk abt the sport w other ppl, esp when they have different opinions to u!!

anyways looong post and i shall tag (w/ no pressure): @toilethamster @russilton @ininininininstayoutstayout @georgierre @gayorphandepression :D

[wifelinkmtg]

Cruel Angel’s Thesis intensifies

Technically, it’s “Kamigawa: Neon Dynasty” and not “Neon Dynasty Kamigawa” but only the latter facilitates “get in the robot, Shinji” jokes when you tap your pilot token to crew your Thundersteel Colossus, so. Anyway, none of the mecha cards are relevant to this project - it would have been too much to hope for a POWER DoLLS situation - so really, the moral of the story is that I should have saved the Samurai Jack title joke for this edition.

TODAY ON WIFELINK: GUSHING ABOUT CYBERPUNK FANTASY JAPAN

NDK was a great set, you have to understand. Do you remember how one of the few unequivocally good things about Legend of Korra was this project of imagining a 1920s industrial setting derived from (mostly) East Asian art and architecture? Yeah, similar story here. Just one example: the Imperial mecha look like someone did origami to sheet metal, which is super cool and lends their faction a distinct visual identity. The art in this set is gorgeous - soaring architecture, grungy neon alleyways, sick cyborgs, spirits (in the original Kamigawa block, spirits had some of the weirdest creature designs Magic had ever had, and this continues that legacy) - sagas! saga art is in-universe visual representation of a story that’s important to the people of the world, and NDK sagas are told on ornamental fans, wall scrolls, porcelain jugs, the carved hilt of a katana, a silk dress, in a leaf carving and vector graphics AND, the best saga art ever, on the back of a biker rat’s leather jacket. (I would be remiss at this point not to recommend Rhystic Studies’ extremely good video on sagas.)

And the mechanics! Sagas turn into creatures when the story is over, sort of living memories. Ninjutsu made a triumphant return, the channel mechanic multiplied interesting choices, and so did the reconfigure mechanic, which let you either use a mechanical centipede as a whip attached to one of your creatures, or let it operate autonomously as a creature in its own right (which led to one of the best type lines in MtG: “Legendary Artifact Creature - Equipment Jellyfish.”)

The draft environment - and I know I’m way off-topic here, but I’m about to say some mildly unkind things about this set and I need to preface it - the draft environment was the best I’ve ever encountered. There were so many different viable archetypes, so many different cool choices you could make during drafts and gameplay. The blue-black ninjas deck, fast red-black artifact sacrifice, recursive green-white enchantments - all felt powerful and fun. The whole set was flavorful and compelling, and there are not that many good wifelink hits, I’m sorry to say.

THE QUALITY OF A MAGIC THE GATHERING SET IN TERMS OF THIS PROJECT IS NOT AN IMPORTANT INDICATOR OF OVERALL SET QUALITY

Heiko Yamazaki, the General (art by Magali Villeneuve)

Heiko makes it where her cousin Norika (also by Villeneuve) doesn’t for two reasons: one is that I find Heiko’s broody expression indicative of a rich and stormy internal life, which always hits me like the smoky scent of a fine scotch or a cup of lapsang souchong. A woman with inner turmoil draws me like a moth to a bug-zapper, which I suppose is why I keep getting into trouble with older women in troubled relationships. “If I simply provide enough unpaid therapy, she’ll leave her abusive husband back in [REDACTED FORMER SOVIET REPUBLIC] & also the closet she’s been in for forty-five years & stay in the United States with me!” Yeah, that’ll happen, idiot.

The other reason is that Norika is a cop.

Tamiyo, Compleated Sage (art by Chris Rahn)

There are a lot of planeswalkers I don’t care about, personally, and I’m not only talking about the male ones. If I’m being honest, my engagement with Magic story has always been kind of shallow on account of Magic story is frequently (but not always!) bad. Like, pursuant to the previous entry, I did enjoy the apparently-uncredited story about the Yamazakis Wizards published back in February. It’s compelling! There’s juice to that relationship. We will never get anything else about these characters.

See, it turns out that the incentives of creating a collectible card game are not terribly aligned with those of creating rich long-form fantasy stories. Novelty sells cards. We hop around. Those few characters who do enjoy a prolonged spotlight often wilt under the attention as we all collectively get sick to death of the fucking Gatewatch or whoever else. Magic the Gathering is still compelling media, or else why would I be doing this, but to me it’s a kaleidoscopic whirl of mostly detached ideas, characters, settings, and vibes.

ALL OF WHICH IS TO SAY that I never knew much or cared to about Tamiyo. She was some nerd from Kamigawa who didn’t save Avacyn, whatever. Then the Phyrexians got her and turned her into an ichor-weeping cyborg brainwashed into working toward the universal expansion of New Phyrexia, a biomechanical plane of horror, corruption, and ego death, so now she’s hot!

Go-Shintai of Hidden Cruelty (art by Johannes Voss)

I don’t think I can explain this one, to be honest. Sometimes you just wanna get fucked up by a magical bone machine.

I KNOW THIS ONE HAS BEEN REALLY TALKY ALREADY BUT I GOT SOME BEHIND-THE-SCENES STUFF TO SAY AND A SET WITH ONLY THREE HITS SEEMS AS GOOD A PLACE AS ANY

Well, only three hits that I can find high-quality images of for. I suppose I could be using card rips of Tia Masic’s Moon-Circuit Hacker (reminiscent of my introduction to cyberpunk via Shadowrun, a bad setting paired with a bad system which nevertheless compelled me to consume more cyberpunk, most of it also bad) or Wisnu Tan’s Spring-Leaf Avenger (a delightful vaguely-orchid-mantis bug ninja) but that would look like

and

...oh wait that actually looks fine, at least to me on desktop. Okay, then, I’ll incorporate those into my strategy as an acceptable last resort going forward. Actually, while I’m at it:

Junji, the Midnight Sky (art by Chase Stone)

The dragon’s hot, man, I don’t know what to tell you.

THE OTHER THING IS ABOUT WHAT WE WILL GENEROUSLY CALL AN “UPDATE SCHEDULE”

Phyrexia: All Will Be One releases the second week in February and I am goddamn well going to review that as soon as it’s out, because I played Cyberqueen at the young and impressionable age of twenty-two and now “quasi-omnipotent dominatrix corrupts you into a biomechanical horror ecstatically enslaved to her will” is the hottest thing I will ever get out of Magic: the Gathering unless Ashiok decides to start force-femming planeswalkers, so I am going to be tearing through one set a week for the next three weeks.

Next time is New Capenna, the Art Deco Metropolis of organized crime, bad draft experiences, and well-muscled arms, followed by a return to Dominaria where my excitement for more Phyrexians will be tempered by the fact that my favorite characters from the last Dominaria set are not quite so hot this time round.

[neverendingparable]

👍 Reccomended

5.3 hrs on record

As a mother of four, I loved The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe (Christmas Edition)! I had never played The Stanley Parable before, but my kid's invited me to play this version to get a 'festively-themed' understanding of the game. I think they were getting sick of me not getting there references. LOL!! Now, I finally understand all the 'Narrators' and 'Settings People' that they go on about, And I got to get in the Christmas spirit with it!

Would reccomend to anyone who wants a fun game to play or to understand what their 12 y.o is going on about now HAHA!!!!!

- Erica xoxxo

[ericareid38374]

👎 Not Reccomended

1.2 hrs on record

THIS WHOLE GAME IS A JOKE 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 I WAS TOLD I WOULD GET A CHRISTIAN STORY ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF DEVOTING YOURSELF TO YOUR JOB 🤬🤬 WHAT WERE THE DEVELOPERS THINKING MAKING THESE GUYS KISS FUCKING FUMING WE CANT SHOW THIS TOO OUR CHILDREN

ZERO STARS DO NOT PLAY !

[bg__seth_]

👎 Not Reccomended

9.0 hrs on record

'The Stanley Parable (Christmas Edition)' is certainly an interesting concept. I can see where the appeal might arise- that of expanding the game's horizons, or providing a furthering level of social commentary now the worldbuilding has grown more solidified in the face of TSP:UD. However, what the game represented was not this. The whole package reeks of desperation and pandering; pandering to an audience that I do not think truly exists. TSP:UDCE is a constant reusing, recycling and repackaging of concepts that were old and tired when they first appeared in the game, and are now simply sickening to see draped in Christmas lights and baubles and thrown in front of the player in lieu of anything new or innovative. This makes TSP:UD seem fresh and exciting, and I did not think even a full craniotomy could get me to type those words.

As a fan of the original TSP, it has been highly disappointing to see an idea that was once so impactful fall so far. TSP:UDCE reeks of desperate attempts to "play it safe"- but "playing it safe" has never been the subject of appeal that got the game where it was to begin with. If you want a "safe" game, I believe Hogwarts Legacy is on sale at this very moment.

I urge the creators to find a new market and new ideas, and to stop clinging desperately to the fifteen minutes of fame that the original provided.

I urge anyone else reading this to not waste your time with this product. In fact, I urge you to close your eyes and imagine you never saw it in the first place.

[goatscheese]

👍 Reccomended

0.4 hrs on record

👍

[iewis_]

👍 Reccomended

3.2 hrs on record

i loved the bit where the narrator was like "its The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe Christmas Edition)™ time and then Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe Christmas Edition)™ed all over the place

[thenarratorsgiantcock]

👎 Not Reccomended

6.6 hrs on record

didnf get to see the narrators Christmas socks. 0/10.

[auaighed7]

👎 Not Reccomended

3.4 hrs on record

STILL NO NARTATOR SEX SCENE

[gdsss888]

👍 Reccomended

5.6 hrs on record

Did you get the Christmas Broom Closet Ending? The Christmas Broom Closet Ending was my favourite.

[xxsaelsamainxx]

👍 Reccomended

9.3 hrs on record

booted up the game. game attempted to load 184 models of birds and immediately crashed. had to restart my whole computer 10/10 no notes

[hilly_b]

👍 Reccomended

3.4 hrs on record

Soaking my festive stanlurine in milk and throwing him at the wall

[fishussy89]

👎 Not Reccomended

4.7 hrs on record

I would say don't waste ur time on this but theres only like ten minutes of new content anyway

Lol

At least the devs made it free ig

[always__s1lent]

👎 Not Reccomended

2.2 hrs on record

WHAT THE FUCKKKK... WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABT THENFUCKING IMAGES DEVS WHAT THE HELL

[blackbirofl]

👎 Not Reccomended

4.3 hrs on record

let me kiss ulmar deluxe or else.COWARDSSSSS

[percyfi223]

[rudo-lfium]

Warning: looooong ass post/rant

So I've watched Avatar in the theater (that stank of mice), and I found it offensive not only to my olfactory senses but to my intellect as well. The plot of The Way Of Water is so watery I am not even going to apologize for the clumsy pun.

This story, it's so silly, I don't even... I mean, James Cameron is such a grand figure in cinema, how did he allow for such a script to even see the light of day? I mean all you need to do when you are making up a story in a fantasy world populated with fantasy people is compare their actions with real people, ask yourself if that's what real people would do in such circumstances, and if the answer is "no", then you need to correct the story, otherwise it is not going to be credible!

But sea (ha-ha) for yourselves. Just try to take this in: so the "Earth baddies" return to Pandora to get Sully's treasonous ass. Yeah, sure, they let slip somewhere that they also want to do some colonizing and terraforming, but seeing that in all the 14 hours of screen time they did exactly none of that, the whole colonization thing must be just a side quest to them. Somehow Sully realizes that all the hubbub is about him personally, and he says to his wife and kids "Hey, I got a great idea, since these angry earth dudes are after me, our presence here in this village is endangering the other other villagers, so let's all up and leave, and run and hide, and this way we shall PROTECT the village!"

And guess what, his dumbass wife after a moment's hesitation says "Sure, that's a splendid idea, I fully endorse it, let's do it at once." And they pack the fuck up out of there and leave their kindred behind for the earth baddies to stomp (because, remember - they are still colonizing the shit out of Pandora no matter what). The Sacred Tree, the ancestors' graves, all of that legacy gets abandoned -- just run and hide. He was the Chief of the tribe, too, mind.

"When danger reared its ugly head

He bravely tucked his tail and fled

Brave, brave, brave

Sir Toruk-Makto!"

And they go and instead of settling on some distant uninhabited island where no one can find them, they join another village, so they can endanger THEM with their presence instead, which is what ultimately happens. Duh!

Yes, they travel a thousand miles and reach a tribe that lives on a collection of islands, like a beautiful archipelago, and they call themselves "the water people" or something, and not only do they speak the same language as Sully's tribe (a thousand miles away, okay?) but they also accept them with almost no reservation. In fact, the only one that's at all concerned about these newcomers is the Chief's wife, but do you know what she finds disturbing? Not the fact that these guys are running from an advancing army of alien, fucking, invaders but because their tails aren't of the same shape as hers! She looks at them and goes "Why joo want to stay wid us? You can't survive underwater with tails and hands like that!" And I'm looking at her like bish, are you alright? You're a LAND creature, ffs, you don't LIVE underwater either, you're a goddamn biped! You only dive in the water SOMETIMES to hunt or do synchronized swimming with f*cking turtles, etc. What do you mean "you wouldn't survive underwater"? And your ass would??

Anyway they start living with them, and life in this other tribe is complete goddamn paradise, there are no hardships of survival, no one works, no one gets sick, no one needs anything fixed, no one is constructing anything, there's just this complete and utter marine idyllic, all they do all day is frolic in the waves and TALK to sea animals. Yeah, you read that right. Animals all know sign language. There must be a co-ed na'vi-sea-turtle school somewhere on those islands that teaches finger alphabet to predominantly finned creatures of the sea, but they left it offscreen. Sometimes I felt like the movie was made by Disney and they somehow slapped Cameron's name on it without him knowing. The life of this water tribe is so absurdly hakuna-matata, it's like they're living inside an amusement park and all the rides are free. So you, as a spectator, spend about a week and a half watching them do underwater donuts astride Pandoran seals, and ride flying crocodile-fish, and talk to whales, and sometimes ponytail-fuck an underwater Sacred Tree (which appears to be a common occurrence on Pandora and thus loses all importance and meaning in the plot, so it's just there, because water people also want one, I guess). Oh yeah, and they learn to hold their breath underwater for an almost indefinite amount of time, thusly becoming "one" with the water tribe.

Naturally the Earth baddies follow Sully to the archipelago and turn everyone's life to shit, but instead of feeling an e-e-e-tsy bit annoyed with Sully's family for bringing the war with them, the water tribe is like "Yay, what joy! You are now our BRETHREN! In fact, we are so pleased with you, why don't you stay with us forever? Here's our underwater Sacred Tree, go pigtail-fuck it to complete the ritual!"

AND THEY DO.

THE END.

Yes, that is the story.

The war isn't even over, they haven't defeated anybody. The cliffhanger is left in place for "movie #3", undoubtedly. But wait, did I mention the villain? It's the Colonel from the first film. The dead Colonel whom Neytiri left skewered on a bunch of 12-foot long na'vi arrows. They resurrected him through a custom avatar that was grown especially for him back on Earth. No one knows why. So the movie can happen, I guess? Or maybe the Earth Armed Forces are experiencing a catastrophic shortage of Colonels, otherwise they'd sent someone else, but what can you do, there are no Colonels left, absolutely have to spend a gazillion space dollars on a bespoke avatar for this guy. And another gazillion on the members of his original squad, because apparently there's a shortage of privates as well. And a few gazillions more on putting together a space armada so he can get back to Pandora and hunt down Sully. Wait, wait, you may ask. So the whole purpose of this enterprise was that some Colonel can have his revenge on some private that's gone over to the other side in a war that took place in a past life? In another galaxy? Yes. Yes, that is so.

There are two more aspects that I found especially irksome. First, Sully keeps harping on how he wants to PROTECT his folks, how his role as a father is that of a DEFENDER. Then why in the fuck did you run away and leave your wife's people to an invading horde's mercy then? Why TF did you leave your own tribe behind? They named you Chief and entrusted their lives to you -- how could you abandon them in the face of an invasion from an aggressive alien race? Wouldn't staying and calling the banners on all the other tribes that you'd allegedly "united" as Toruk-Makto, and fighting back -- wouldn't that be the noble thing to do? The very idea that running away is somehow a manifestation of being protective is laughable. And so are all characters who agree with him without a hint of irony.

When else was Sully being protective, hmm, let me see, it must be when he said to his wife "Honey, the Colonel has got our daughters, grab our remaining kids and stay someplace safe while a gather a team of fierce warriors and go deal with the motherfucker and save our girls!" But that's not what he said. He was like "Um, honey, why should I risk my ass alone, you can shoot can't you? Let's go and risk our lives together, and fuck them kids who are bound to become orphaned should we fail!" Right, what a fatherly slash husbandly attitude.

The second thing is the whole "you must learn to stay underwater very-very long or else we aren't going to accept you in our water tribe" situation. You see, the final battle is taking place on a sinking human ship. I mean, it's sinking. Sure, the Colonel's gang has got your two girls tied up to a railing with some rope (not even a chain), but THE SHIP IS SINKING. Get the hint? It's removing itself from the surface of the sea, where everyone can breathe, and placing itself under the water, where you and family can hold your breath, like, forever, and all those bad guys CERTAINLY can't! LET THE FUCKER SINK, you idiot, wait for the bastards to suffocate and then go untie your daughters, I mean, if they can ride Pandoran giant herrings deep inside coral mazes and swim alongside whales while grabbing onto their fins for miles and miles -- surely they can endure a couple of minutes of HOLDING ABSOLUTELY STILL and waiting for their Dad to come fetch a knife? *shakes head* But no, no. We can't have that. Neytiri, Sully's wife, has had absolutely nothing to do this whole movie. She's just kind of *there*, like furniture. She *cried in anguish* twice but aside from that -- nothing. We need her to at least shoot her bow and arrows at somebody (a family heirloom pompously given to her by her late father), so let's engage in a life-threatening shootout with a squad of earth marines in avatar bodies armed with machine guns and grenade launchers, right? Because bows and arrows have worked so well in the past, right? Those Aztecs and Mayans sure did lick them pitiful conquistadors armed with their puny muskets and harquebuses, didn't they. *head shaking intensifies*

The theater was full, by the way. Every seat taken. No one left. With about 1.5 hours to go I stepped outside to quickly meet somebody about an errand. I must have spent about 15-20 minutes on it. When I came back, nothing changed. The mice still stank . People were still filling their seats, their eyes glued to the screen. "Oh my god," I thought to myself then. "I'm inside the Idiocracy movie."

[queen--kenobi]

Congrats on the Duke win!! 🥰💙🏀 Been very MIA lately, but I'm trying to get back in the swing of things. Playing some serious catch up. 😘 I know you've got an OC for HoT/HotD but tell me more!!

Welcome back!!!

Hell yeah!!! I didn't end up watching it because I had to get up way too early for work, but I'm happy with the results sfsgsh

Okay so this might get long, I hope you're okay with that. I have a shit ton of lore. Not even just for Elayna but for the Reynes. They're my OCs now

I've got two because they're stories are intertwined but not in a "we will always find each other way" (romantic) but in a "we will always find each other" (hateful) way

My main one is Elayna Reyne! She's the only daughter and third child of Lord Alon Reyne. She has one surviving older brother, Seban, and a younger brother, Ryman. Her other older brother, Reynard, died in a mine collapse that killed him and Seban's mom. Alon got remarried, so Elayna and Seban are half-siblings (or are they? Dun dun dun). Elayna is absolutely a Daddy's girl and Alon's favorite whoops

Alon gets really sick when she's a preteen, and Seban sends Elayna to be a Ward of the Lannisters. Now, Elayna doesn't necessarily like the Lannisters but it's not full on hate at this point. It's more like "oh. Them"

Enter Tymon Lannister

Tymon is a fuckhead to end all fuckheads. It's canon in a modern AU Tymon is the played lacrosse in high school (probably even competitively in college), khakis and a polo, legacy family at Harvard and Yale, "it's not pink it's Nantucket Red", "I'm a nice guy just give me a chance", top honors frat boy kind of guy

Anyway. Elayna gets warded to the Lannisters, and Tymon sees Elayna and is just like "She's mine. I'm gonna marry her some day, and she's gonna have my kids and be my wife. She was made for me." Elayna doesn't hate him at first, and even gets a tiny bit of a crush on him, because he is legitimately nice to her. It's just when she starts noticing how he treats literally everyone else she's just like "mmmmhhhmmmm. No." Unfortunately Tymon is the only Lannister that's been halfway decent with her, and when Tymon feels like Elayna is pulling away, he starts to get. Unpleasant

Eventually, Alon recovers. Alon asks Elayna is sent home if only for a few weeks because he's missed his daughter. The Lannisters let Elayna go back to Castamere. Alon takes one look at Elayna and realizes oh, she is miserable. It's been about 3 or 4 years of her with the Lannisters, and Elayna is clearly not doing well. Also Elayna ABSOLUTELY hates the Lannisters at this point and has decided her purpose in life is to bring that whole fucking family down to the ground

Alon, being a loving father and the GOAT, says fuck that and instead of sending Elayna back to Casterly Rock, sends Elayna to the Red Keep. Alon was at Court for a bit in his preteen and teenage years and was actually fairly decent friends with Viserys and had friendly rivalry going on with Daemon. Alon knows Viserys will find a place for Elayna, and he does. I'm leaning towards Elayna being one of Helaena's ladies in waiting, but I'm not sure

Elayna ends up befriending Helaena! She and Helaena end up very good friends. Elayna also meets Aemond and phew boy. Elayna falls hard and fast. Thankfully for her, Aemond does too. Unfortunately Aegon also kind of falls for Elayna. Yes Elayna has three of Alicent's children wrapped around her finger ssssshhhhh

Now. Remember how I mentioned Tymon has decided Elayna is his? Yeah, uh, he pops up at Court. He tries to claim it's so he can learn from Tyland blah blah blah, but it's blatantly obvious Tymon has no interest in that. Tymon is just there to persuade Elayna to "come home" and "come to her sense". And Tymon is a Lannister which means he's decided Elayna will be "back where she belongs, with who she belongs", and he will do anything to make that happen

I don't want to say too much more because I don't want to spoil what's coming. I will say this, though. Elayna's story is a tragedy because, ultimately, she is the reason the Reynes are massacred. Obviously she's not the inciting incident, but she sets everything up, if that makes sense? It's obviously not her intention but Elayna's actions ultimately doom future generations and her entire family/bloodline

Canon is not a happy story. I have a bunch of other AUs that are happy but. Canon is an absolute tragedy