#anyways im posting this bc i need the record and bc if it was inspiring to me it might help someone else

[1o1percentmilk]

how the hell r u gonna b in ur early 20s with zero goals. pick the craziest most impractical one out there and start grinding

[faeriegoth]

As someone who is recently obsessed with hand-poked tattoos and doesnt use tiktok, THANK YOU for uploading that video of you practicing! There is like... not a lot of info on how to get started hand-poking the safe and sterile way online.

I had no idea what 'multiple passes' meant (and see people railing against it all the time) and couldnt figure out a way to hold the needle 😳 Wrapping it in tape is so smart and way safer than the other methods I've seen! A LOT of 'pros' are out there taping them to popsicle sticks or chopsticks... and re-using needles 😵 my tat artist wraps her tattoo machine in the same kind of tape, I don't know why I didn't think of it.

I am terrified of 'starting out' on my own skin so I've been trying to do as much research as possible on practicing the same way you would with a machine. Im going to buy the same supplies my tattoo artist has, but with a ton of fake skin, and practice on those for as long as I need to perfect the techniques and develop my style eventually.

Anyway I wish you luck on your hand-poke journey!! Your first stuff looks great already. Your vid encouraged & inspired me. I'll follow you on ig soon

thank you for this message it's v sweet :) i'm glad it helped and inspired you! if i'm honest i've had a lot going on in my personal life, mental health hasn't been great + also don't have stable housing rn so i haven't practiced in a little while, so this was a really nice message to read i appreciate it. hopefully i'll have the space to get back into it soon.

the guide i was following did suggest wrapping a popsicle stick to the needle (you see me use it to scoop the vaseline in the vid) but i found it didn't work for the way i hold the needle to poke. my tattoo artist used a popsicle stick when they did my arm tattoo, but i use tape. either way is fine just whatever works for u! i think the stick can help keep it steady and consistent, but it just doesn't feel right for the way i hold pencils etc when making art so i go with tape instead. re-using needles is obv a big no-no though, also if you're working on skin, whatever surface you're working on in the space should be sanitised and covered with cling film/saran wrap to make it as hygienic as possible - i just didnt do that with the fake skin bc i wasn't working with real skin. i'm not sure if they post internationally but i got my handpoke kit from here and they include a link to an informative guide by the seller who tattoos for a living. def recommend it if you're looking for some more insight and information

if you do follow my instagram i have a few videos of me practicing handpoke pinned as a highlight on my profile :) they're not as in-depth as the one i posted here, more like a little digital record so i can see how i improve as time goes on.

good luck on your handpoke journey! i'm by no means an expert but if you ever have any more questions about it i'll do my best to answer them

[euthanasia-enthusiast]

new theory i just thought up abt psychological damage from multiple choice testing. the way i learned how to pass my classes in like fuckin 2nd grade without doing any work or paying attention in class was to like,, focus only on the end of grade tests bc a 100 would bring a f to like a d or c. and i def wouldnt study but i would work backwards based on the options for answer and fucking just learn enough to pass based only on the test itself somehow??? for certain classes i would read the textbook like it was a novel if i felt compelled to for whatever reason, or if the teacher had taken away all other possible distractions and my thoughts werent interesting that day. but anyway now i really fucking struggle with any information or decision or record keeping/journaling situation that is not a multiple choice question.

if someone asks me what i want or says something like "im here for you if you need anything" or "tell me about yourself" or "how are you doing" or "what are you into" or any number of vague but extremely common questions/statements, my mind goes completely blank, i have no idea how to answer without having at least an example of the type of answer theyre expecting. i feel like im missing something, like i only heard the last word of a sentence, like im missing all of the context required to answer. i know its usually dependent on the exact circumstance but i have no way to determine what the circumstance is and what options are available/acceptable in that circumstance without being told. there are infinite possible answers that are true and infinite more that would be an acceptable bending of the truth but determining the relevance of each is impossible without the prior knowledge of what is relevant to the question and what the person had in mind when they asked, and there are also infinite ways each infinite answer could be misinterpreted!!!

open honest communication is a myth

writing blog posts is a fucking struggle and i hope that somehow doing it badly anyway will strengthen something in my mind to make it not quite as difficult. at least thats what im telling myself to justify the compulsion to word vomit nonsensically for several hours and post unedited to the sideblog where i usually just talk about killing myself.

the stupidest and most annoying struggle that somewhat inspired this theory though, is my inability to pick a video or tv show to watch without there being something particularly interesting in the recommended section. i genuinely cannot on my own think of anything i would be entertained or interested in, even in vague terms specific enough for a search term.

i believe there are many more examples and the words ive written dont really portray the issue accurately but the very issue prevents its own analysis, as i could not think of the words to document the experiences so i dont remember enough to analyze, and i have no clue what the possible conclusions could be so i cannot work backwards to determine which is most likely

but i believe i lack some type of mental infrastructure required for converting abstract thought into something that can fit into an established framework like language or action, or some type of inability to process and understand abstract thought. (im not honestly sure i even understand what a thought is, and what differentiates it from a feeling or belief or "hearing voices in your head"), often when im journaling i will write out the objective facts of whatever event, with the intention of extrapolating how i think and feel about it, and just draw a blank. maybe i think of a few possible interpretations of the events, some feelings that would make sense, the feelings implied by compulsions i felt, but the act of determining how i feel and believe and desire in a specific situation feels like what a fucking ai chatbot does, just guessing the most likely next word based on past data, with no method for determining the accuracy of the statement.

maybe i just smoked too much weed or i have brain damage or its some kind of psychosis/dissociation or maybe its the autism who fucking knows. its probably completely unrelated to the us education system idk what i was on about i barely remember how i started this rant

[mjvnivsbrvtvs]

doing some project management organization and realizing that using brutus as the lynch pin for remembering dates relative to whatever the hell he was up to was, in fact, a mistake, since events I care about happen for about ten more years after he dies

[princeanxious]

I'm still trying to figure out how exactly im going to record this process- if I do, bc I may just not have the resources available to do so, havent figured that out yet, though arguably the biggest resource I need right now is uninterrupted time and I'm just not going to get that with a full time job and split days off, so- anyway

Virgil's base doll is in transit, and the others eagerly await his arrival as I work on stripping the doll bodies down to their bases. It is at this time i realize the twins doll bases are gonna give me just as much grievence in the way of modifications as Janus's just to get them to look 'normal'-ish.(not even touching on the fact that those three's base dolls dont have humanoid ears and that i will be having to make them djdjdhd RIP)

So anyway, heres a glimpse of the boys(ill leave yall to take guesses at who is who but I hoped to make it obvious in pose alone) as I was working on hair wefts this afternoon and pulled them out for inspiration/reference.

(I will be using this post to begin the tag '#tss doll project' on my blog as a way for myself to post updates as well as allow others to keep up with them 💕)

[20cm]

⭐️ AS we have discussed it def feels that we have been mootz for much longer than we have, you v quickly have become one of my favorite people on this app ! it’s bc truly you have the best best energy & are so creative in so many ways; whether you’re sharing your gifs, poetry, art, or just bits of yourself I’m *genuinely* inspired by everything you put out there. not only that but you r just so warm and kind and thoughtful. I feel very grateful to be in your orbit & the more we interact I only feel that more ! kith kith for you & thank u for being exactly who you are 💘

eri 💕💕😭 PLEASE hold on i need a second 🥺🥺 (i hope its ok tht i use tht nickname btw, u put it in the survey + its so cute 🥺) this is so so so sweet i had to read it over a couple times bc im just like 🥺🥺🥺??💖💖💖💖💖💖

thank you genuinely for like. kgjdlkfdg idk appreciating my work in general that means a lot :") 💖 like im rly happy tht u remembered my poetry + art bc i havent posted much of it 🤍🤍

kfdjgf im . just overally rly thankful <3 this is beyond sweet and i feel like a broken record answering these but i rly do mean it all 💕💕💕tht u find me warm and stuff is genuinely all i want to be for people so :")) <333333

anyways 🤧🤍🤍. YOU!! im so so glad to be in your orbit as well like same at you 100% <3 genuinely one of my fave people ive met on tumblr and the fact tht we can talk is so important 2 me!! i seriously just smile whenever i see you and i love talking + interacting here<3 i rly admire your work and dedication and you make this place better with your presence for real 💕

mwah mwah back to you and sob thank YOU right back 💖💖💖💖

send me a ⭐ if im one of your favorite mutuals and explain why, maybe? <33

[selfcareparker]

LMAOO I WAS GONNA BRING UP FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLIDER BUT I WASNT SURE IF YOU WERE WATCHING IT HSKAJ (are you liking it? i know it’s only the first episode but ya know, another one tomorrow night- well tomorrow night for me, and did you like wandavision?? i loved it!!)

oh my goodness i’m watching lion king while writing this and i haven’t seen it in a while and i am..... emotional. but anyway, i love that streaming services think that imma pay for them while they charge $50 a month. like yes of course i have that kind of money and i am going to give it to you to watch tv 🙄 that $50 is budgeted to sims thank you. (ALSO SIMS!!! i’ll get to that in a minute) now see if i don’t google levidia right this minute LMAOO, not that i’m gonna use it.. just for the research...

AND HDKSHS SEND THAT CHAOS WALKING LINK LMAO i saw it for the third time with a different one of my friends and she wasn’t the best one to see it with? she literally was on her fucking phone and i was like ok whatever her loss not mine, and idk if you’ve read the books or if you’ve seen it by now, but by the end of the whole movie, after they’ve confirmed THE THING throughout the whole movie she asked the dumbest question and i’m like diD YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE, and i guess she didn’t. so. this sounds so vague but i don’t wanna spoil the movie for you just in case lol.

THE STORY LMAOO, so A DIFFERENT FRIEND LOL, like my oldest bff, we had a day together and we wanted to go see chaos walking. and i honest to God thought that no one would be seeing this movie. like NO ONE. every day, i checked the theater seating and no one was there right? plus i really wanted us to have the theater to ourselves. so we sit in the wrong seats, the row in front of us, STILL THINKING WE’RE ALONE. and then these 3 older people came in AND IM ABOUT TO SCREAM FHSJSH AND IM LIKE “are we in your seats?” and they we were like uh yeah, AND IT WAS SO BAD LMAOO , we’re moving and everything would’ve been FINE but my friend’s reclined seat was going down so slow and as it’s going shes LITERALLY SAYING ALOUD “awkward awkward awkward” so she thinks forget it, lemme just get up. HER BAG GETS CAUGHT ON HER CHAIR AND HER FRIES AND THEY SPILL ALONG WITH HER HONEY MUSTARD 😭😭 ALL OVER THE FLOOR! so i’m trying not to laugh lmao but those aren’t even our seats and we just made a mess, so naturally, i get on the floor and start cleaning it up with my napkins (this is going for too long) AND MY FRIEND IS STILL SAYING “awkward awkward awkward awkward” and i’m really abt to crack up bECAUSE LIKE SHUT UP HAHAHA and we’re cleaning it and shit and the oldest lady is gonna say “yeah you’re not gonna make an old lady get on the floor, are you?” AND I WANTED TO LAUGH AND SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME BC DID WE ASK YOU TO, NO, so then i had to get the manager and she helped us clean it, we got new fries and everything was fine, it’s just a crazy story bc LITERALLY WE COULDVE AVOIDED IT AND EVERYTHING BUT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE HAD TO COME AND SEE THIS MOVIE😭😭 at least the gentlemen was nice.. he helped us clean. but then his wife was like “i aM nOt siTTiNg tHeRe” and at first i thought she was a teenager bc of her stink attitude but her husband was nice. and it’s not like we weren’t cleaning it up, we were!!! like i was so apologetic- anyway.

about sims! do you play console or pc? wait,, you already told me you play pc bc your computer was broken, i’m glad you can play now though :’)) litetally when i read in the tags that you’re playing sims !!!! and are you hyped for bunk beds? i have cc so i’ve had them for a bit, but they were glitchy... but i’m so excited we have them now! i should really play sims today...

GURL IM SO PROUD OF YOU 🥺🥲 i know you aren’t fluent in everything and you aren’t a linguistic genius LMAO but it’s still soooo amazing :’) here i am reading the captions while ur just going hahah, yea i tried duolingo but.... i didn’t stick to it HDJSH talking to you though makes me so interested because you know all these languages, not even studying them like that, but you have this foundation and ahh it’s just super cool. LOL YOU DONT SOUND LAME HAJA IM TELLING YOU ITS SO SO COOL, i’m loving this lesson btw oh my goodness- HSKAJS YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT??? HDYSJHS MY ONLY ENGLISH SPEAKING ASS??? HAHAHAHHAH i find that word (Rindfleischetikettie- i’m not gonna write the whole thing i’m sorry) very interesting... like... wow. did you have to google that or did you just know lmao

OKAH THE WATER THING HDKDJDKS UR GONNA TERRIFY ME HAHAH OH MY LORD- first of all CROATIA 😍😍 but thinking about it like that, I WOULD FREAK OUT TOO HAHSGSG i never go that deep into the water, or if i do i have my dad with me lol and i kind of hold onto him bc ive seen/heard too many things about people being dragged into the sea. but i loveee the water (i wanted to be a mermaid soooo bad ohmigosh)

I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ONE CANNOT LIKE MUSIC ITS AWFUL !! lmao yeah i haven’t even listened to harry’s his first album, everyone says they love it more. I WAS GONNA SAY IMMA LISTEN TO ONLY ANGEL BUT THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE IT HUHAHAH also i have never listened to anything by mgk (i actually had to google who he was IM SORRY😔) i’m tempted to listen tho lol PLEASE JUSTIN BIEBER- I PROMISE IM NOT LAUGHING AT U IVE JUSY NEVER HAD SOMEONE SAY THAT B4!! like i don’t know many people who’ve liked him bUT NOW IM GONNA LISTEN & the cardboard cutout- okay. 😭😭😭

oh my goodness to see the vamps live 🤧 TO SEE ANYONE LIVE PLEASE JJDGSHAHGD and little mix is so good oh my goodness- i actually haven’t been to that many concerts.. i was at my first one, elsie fest (it’s like a broadway thing really) in uhhh october of 2019, yea i took my mom for her birthday bc she loves darren criss and i’m obsessed with glee lmao OH MY GOODNESS YOUVE BEEN TO SO MANY!!! and those are such great artists 😩😩

LMAO UR FINE, hamilton is a musical that lin manuel miranda wrote and i think generally made? i’m obsessed, but basically it was on broadway and then recorded and put on disney+ ... idk i guess it counts a film bc it’s like a movie really cuz it was recorded but in what 2018 or 2016? i don’t remembers the date that is on disney+ but it’s strange how i got into it, a lot of my friends were obsessed and i was like uhh why? and while researching it and watching it, trying to figure out why people love it... i fell in love with it LMAO but the music is FANTASTIC and lin is incredible😭 but yes yes yes i loveeeee high school musical!! my dad actually took my cousins to see it on ice or something (i absolutely forget lmao) but i don’t know how people don’t know hsm. it upsets me.

OKAY IM DOWN TO THE BOTTOM HAHAHA (it takes me so long to respond, now i’m on lion king 2 WHICH IS SO GOOD PLEASE FHHSSHHSHSH) i could respond in chunks but i kind of enjoy responding like this? it feels a bit like a letter but if this whole thing is overwhelming i’ll cut it up lol

+ yes that was me about your fic and sleep and everything lol but it was so good😭 i don’t understand how you write peter so well like you have this ability to capture his.. everything? i’m crine. all the time. over your fics. & i cannot describe my happiness for youuuu :’) i’m so happy you’re writing again 🥺🥰 the thing about how you only want to write the long peter fic but you don’t know how to continue... i feel that so so so hard, i don’t think i told you but ughh i was so blah bc of that feeling of having pent up inspiration for only one fucking thing and not being able to write it. it’s so frustrating 😭

not to add more to this but i need to vent a bit? the situation is definitely different bc with your major it obviously requires for you to ya know, know english lol, but uhm bc i’m homeschooled ive been cheating on all my work SHSHDHSJ like i google the answers but i’m still learning! it’s just..... i find it so unnecessary, like going for an audition no one is gonna say to me “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” like tf??? there’s literally no point. i’m gonna be getting into voice lessons again soon and i’m already doing dance, AND i’ll be doing this summer camp program (more hamilton lol) and thinking about school is only making me stress more, like i haven’t been able to rehearse dance at all this week bc of it...... so

hahaha reading your tags, lonely anon would still be accurate HAHAHHAHA // another add: yea i love ur current theme, i’ve gotten used to “seeing you” like this, but anything will look super pretty :)) ALSO HOW IS IT STILL SNOWING THERE, i swear it’s getting warmer and warmer by the day here 😭🤧

these long ass posts, my gosh🥲 lonely lovely anon <3

Omg yes it does feel like a letter sldkdj and then the few days of waiting also make more sense okay i love this ❣️💕❤️💓❤️💞🧡💜💘(wtf)sksjhz

Dear lovely anon,

ALSKSJVKD yes i‘m liking falcon and winter soldier dlkdh i haven‘t watched the second episode yet but i‘ll watch it tomorrow! but i didn‘t watch wandavision........ eidislskks i was going to but idk i wasn‘t that interested in it and watching series is already too much of a commitment (what can i say i‘m a Sagittarius—🤧 (no i’m joking i actually know NOTHING about starsigns)) didjj that i couldn‘t force myself to watch it, ALSO i hate (idk if this is an unpopular opinion) when every episode is like a whole hour. i‘m rewatching an old series today (it‘s german so i won‘t even get into it) and the episodes are 25 mins each and i‘ve already watched 8 episodes today ridlndjdjd,,, and i feel like if the episodes were an hour each i wouldn‘t have gotten past episode 2 today like idk.... even if series had the same length in total, i prefer when the individual episodes are shorter idk why tho tbh (so yeah i already wasn‘t 100% convinced about watching wandavision so i just couldn’t make myself watch a bunch of 1hour episodes— i‘ve heard that it‘s good tho- but i‘m not much of a series person so. Dldkk (have we talked about this already??? sorry i don‘t remember what i said lol and i couldn‘t find my own post anymore so dkdjsh) (WAIT I JUST CHECKED THE WANDAVISION EPIOSRDES ARENT EVEN THAT LONG??? Okay wait i might watch it now - did you like it? let me know if i should watch it— why did i think they were 60minutes???)

okay another confession i‘ve never watched the lion king????? i mean i watched it when i was a child but i was too young to actually pay attention to any kind of plot i just liked the songs lol sldkdj i‘ve been meaning to watch it for years tho 🦁 (idk it just felt appropriate to put a lion emoji lmoaoo)

OH MY GOD THE CHAIS WALKING/CINEMA STORY AHSJSKKS😭😭😭😭 NOOOOO (very fitting that there was so much chaos when you were watching a film that has chaos in the title loool) and the “awkward awkward awkward“ SAME SKSKSLSKDJ, that‘s literally me 24/7 ahajshshhshshsh. Like i was so skdjdjdkdllsldksnsnsnsb while i read what you sent me djslslsjdjdbdn why are old ladies always so grumpy btw 🥲🥲🥲 at least the man was nice tho! and wait did i read that right... you have fries (which, to me, are called chips dusuusldk) at your cinemas?? (Movie theatres sorry sksjsh) we just have popcorn and nachos and drinks i want chips too when i‘m watching a film what😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also i still haven’t watched it so thanks for not spoiling it!!! (idk when i’ll watch it i’m so bad with films and even worse with series💀💀💀- same with cherry. i literally forgot all about cherry, i was SO hyped when the trailer came out like i’ve never been so excited about a movie... and then it came out... and i still haven‘t watch it like what‘s wrong with me???? Dkdjdjdjdklsl i feel like i‘m not gonna watch it anytime soon tbh, but i wanna watch chaos walking i just have to find the time

Okay and @ your other friend who wasn‘t paying attention like why are you even watching the film then???? but ok (omg this sounds so mean i‘m sure she‘s very nice but in this situation just like❔❔❔)

SIMS ahhh, BUNK BEDS, ahhhh sdljdjdjdkdkdldksj i actually haven‘t played it since the update 🤧🤧 i made both of my sims (enisa (bestselling author already, thank you) and michael (aspiring doctor)) go to university and bro it takes so long 😭😭 and you can‘t do anything else if you want them to do well so literally the last three times i played sims i was just constantly clicking their homework and computerd to write their assignments (i play it in german so idk what its called on the sims) and do their presentations and do them all over again so that they get better or whatever for HOURS, but imma play again soon

also i‘m living my fanfiction life loool, so i made my two sims neighbours (on the same plot tho but i made two small separate houses lol, i still wanted to control both of them at the same time but i made sure they didn‘t interact before i wanted them to skdjdjdk). and first they both experimented and got some experience in the love department you know (all genders, cause i have to live my sexuality even in a pc game slskdjh— wait, i‘ve never lived my sexuality irl like i‘ve done NOTHING nothing with guys nothing with girls (🥲) but maybe that’s why i want to do it even more in the sims) and then they met at uni and realised like hey we‘re neighbours and now they‘re together (but michael accidentally had an alien baby with another woman (who was an alien which i was not aware of) cause i wasn‘t paying attention like i said woohoo not try for baby like michael why is your pull out game so weak tf LSHDDHDJDJSKKDKSKDKS okay but making out and flirting and doing all the fun stuff in the sims turns me on way more than it should PFAHAHHAHSH) so idk why i told you this but I’m creating that neighbour!au in the sims lmaoooo

i did not have to google Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsübertragungsaufgabengesetz (just did it again😌 sisjshhs) but i might have mixed up the words überwachung und übertragung or i might have even forgotten a word skskks but in the end it doesn‘t matter (by linkin park- ok i‘m so sorry it‘s 2 am and i have a headache from having waveformers in my hair all day but i still wanted to reply to this now so sorry if i‘m not making any sense right nowbahahshah)

i wanted to be a mermaid too dldjdksksj like h2O and all those series convinced me i could be one like. i remember i‘d always go in the deep pool and attempt to swim like them in all the series with that wave motion i must have looked so crazy with my goggles as well dkdjsksöksj (i was like twelve but still)

so mgk has two sides one is hip hop/rap which is like ~~~~ idk he has good and bad songs, but his latest album is like punk pop snd I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, so if you like punk pop I’d recommend his album tickets to my downfall (i don‘t blame yoj if you don‘t like it tho like about a year ago i would have HATED that type of music dkdkdkkd)🥴

Okay talking about music, there‘s this german rapper and he is... not a good person. he‘s literally a criminal and extremely sexist but to me he‘s still hot???????? he‘s even cute at times even tho he has tattoos everywhere and is like 6‘5 and is super aggressive but i see him and i‘m like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 my heart beats only for you💘💘💘💘and he released a new song today and i watched the video and i‘m wondering wtf is wrong with me 😃 (he did look particularly cute cause he was high so idk he wasn’t really aggressive in this one) 😭 so i thought i‘d share that LMAO IDK

(not saying tattoos aren‘t cute btw i LOVE tattoos imma get some soon, but you know he looks like someone your grandma would be afraid of (and in his case rightfully so💀)

okay wait i‘m getting so tired it‘s 2 am i think i‘ll have to do the rest tomorrow but i wanted to do it now😭🥺🥺 see you tomorrow

it is now 3:42 am and i couldn‘t sleep so here we go again

girl you can laugh at me for liking justin tho skskks i wanna laugh at myself idk, like i said i really really really liked him a few years go, basically my life was at least 50% justin and then he went on a break for a while and released an album last year which i hated 🥴 but this album is wow. (Still weird to me because it‘s literally the definition of pop and i don‘t ever listen to pop?) and it‘s so weird because i used to know so much about justin and had so many friends who loved him as well and now it‘s like I’m listening to someone new? Don‘t get me wrong i never KNEW justin and i never will and i‘m aware of that shahsh but yeah i used to be soooo used to him and it‘s like reconnecting with an old friend and you realise you don‘t know that friend anymore- like you don‘t know them anymore at all. I mean justin is weird nowadays 😂😂😂 so pls laugh at me tbh dskksjsjsh

awww it‘s so wholesome that you gave your mom tickets to the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i gave my mum tickets for pink like 2 years ago and she loved it so much and i was like 🥰🥰🥰 (i went with her) AND OMG GLEE ok so unfortunately i barely remember glee, but i used to watch it too!!!! And it‘s actually on my list of series i wanna watch (again) so youre making me want to watch it even more (but like i said i‘m bad with series so 😩😩😩 who knows when i‘ll rewatch it)

When all this pandemic shit is over (let‘s be hopeful <3333) then you need to go to as many concerts as possible!!!!! i‘ve been to SO MANY and it‘s literally one of the things in my life i‘m the most grateful for, concerts are some of the best experiences i‘ve ever had in my life especially the ones that are in smaller concert halls where you can feeeel the vibe and everyone‘s energy (and that sounds awful thinking about it mid-pandemic 😐) anyway—

Okay omg you‘re absolutely making me want to watch hamilton right now like omg i WANT TO WATCH IT NOW but it‘s 4 am sodndkdldl

what you said about my peter fics🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺like omg i love these emojis they literally just describe how i felt when reading what you said so, yes, 🥰🥺 + thank you :) it really means a lot <3

and no omg i totally get the studying thing. like last year before i graduated .. was that last year? yes wtf omg okaykdjdj, so the last three months before i had my final exams we were just in a lockdown and we didn‘t even have online classes. We had nothing except one teacher who left our group chat (😭) because she was mad at us (?) and one maths teacher who did an online ““lesson““ once a week. he‘d ask: so does anyone have questions. us: . Him: okay, bye then. So. Yeah dndldldj. But we had one online test and it was in german and like i read the book wee were supposed to read? but the questions on the test were all unanswerable (is that a word?) and i had to google everything (got an A tho 🤪 but only because i googled everything so i was so scared that i wouldn‘t be able to get a good result on the final exam because what if i‘d gotten used to just googling everything and i couldn‘t do it by myself anymore? anyway it was all fine in the end but yeah at times i couldn‘t even study because i had so much anxiety about studying and yeah- like this whole annoying cycle. but you said you‘re still studying———- okay wait 👁👄👁 i forgot what i was going to say??????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like wtf. Is wrong with me? And i‘m reading what you wrote again and i just don‘t know what i was going to say? Like i get what you‘re saying obviously but i‘m like? Idk 4am brain ayeee, please vent more if you need to and elaborate further because right now i‘m???? Too dumb to respond to this right now wtf. I‘m so sorry lmao ddlkdjdjd what is even going on like i‘m sitting here open mouthed just like ? But btw the fact that you have Voice and dance lessons is like SO FUCKING COOL like oh my god that is sosososos cool wtf, i was thinking that when you first talked about it too

And “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” ODHDKSLDBDJDOFIDKDNDLDK

Yes i know about the weather dkdkdkjd but it‘s getting (a lot) warmer here too and where i live we kind of get a weird type of wind called föhn (which literally means hair dryer but idk if that‘d the reason why it‘s called that, i‘m too tired to think of whether it makes sense rn) and it gives me headachesssssss and the changing weather is also giving me headaches 😭😭😭😭 so this season right now is just headache season and i hate summer so i wish it would just snow again lmao (okay it‘s getting so late that it‘s early already snd i can hear this bird chirping so fucking loud wtf i‘m also getting a headache 🤧🤧🤧) but at least i can do my new theme soon (i hope it‘ll look good🥺 and omg thank you for what you said about my current theme- i always feel like i‘m so bad with aesthetics, i obviously like my theme but i feel like every single person on tumblr has a theme that is prettier than mine so it was very nice to hear you say that you love it👉🏼👈🏼 (i‘m so used to it by now that i actually hate it lmao so it‘s getting yeeted soon and i‘m making megan thee stallion my pfp 🤪 (if the graphics and shit works out skdjdjdj)

[yoon-kooks]

Pick Me Up

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: Fluff, LIGHT smut, fwb!AU

Summary: Jimin has a cute habit of visiting his favorite songwriter late at night.

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: five seconds of smut if you squint

A/N: reposting this drabble from 2018 bc tumblr is acting up again. also! im posting a new prequel to this later on today! 

-

Knock, knock. You glance away from your computer screen and into your mirror that reflects a shadowy figure standing outside your studio door. Normally, you wouldn’t respond to a potential zombie lurking around the BigHit building so late at night. But you know who it is.

“Did someone order a large coconut cold brew?” Jimin says in his best delivery boy voice. Of course, you hadn’t actually ordered anything, but you certainly are in dire need of a pick-me-up after working endless hours on a new song.

“I’m pretty sure I didn’t,” you shake your head as he places the cold drink into your hands. With the first sip, you give him a smirk. “But thanks, Jimothy.”

“How’s the song coming along?” He looks over your shoulder at your computer and then back at your dark circles.

“It's… coming,” you sigh. As much of a knack you have for songwriting, there’s something that has you stumped. “At the very least, I’ve nearly finished the melody composition.”

“Ooh, can I hear what you have so far?” Jimin’s eyes light up. You love how genuinely interested he is in the songwriting process. He’s always dropping by your studio after completing his own schedule, often bringing you snacks or coffee from your favorite café. Although you know it’s sometimes just for a quickie, you really do appreciate his company.

“Jimin, the last time I gave you a sneak peek, you deadass leaked it onto Twitter,” you cross your arms. “Bang PD will lose his shit if it happens again without his consent.”

“In my defense, I just wanted to show off how talented our songwriter is~” Jimin says with a hmph.

“Fine,” you roll your eyes to conceal a smile, pulling the boy into your studio and shutting the door behind him. “Just don’t record anything or tell the other members about this!”

“It’ll be our secret.” His hushed ASMR voice is only a tiny bit seductive, slyly entwining his chubby pinky with yours. “Promise.”

“Hmm, on second thought, I don’t trust you~” You break off the pinky swear and skip back to your computer, sliding your headphones back over your ears. Teasing him is your favorite pastime.

“You’re so stubborn…” The boy rolls a chair over and takes a seat next to you. He just sits there quietly. Whether he’s paying more attention to you or to what you’re editing, you aren’t sure. All you know is that he’s never a bother to have around, especially when you’re stressed over deadlines and low on inspiration.

After rearranging a bit of the composition, you slip your headphones off and put them over the boy’s ears for him to hear. You stare into his focused eyes, watching his every reaction to your work in progress. He looks right back at you, trying his hardest not to give you any kind of feedback, just to spite you.

When the track ends, Jimin simply removes the headphones and deadass says it was “aite”.

“Go home!” You shove his shoulder and send him flying off on his rolling chair.

By the time he rolls his way back to you, you’ve already resumed working on the track. “I like it so far,” he watches and waits for you to turn towards him before giving you hearty eyesmile.

“Really?” You ruffle his soft hair before slipping your hand down to his neck. Your fingers massage him gently.

He nods. You use the tips of your fingers to tilt his chin, giving you full access to his plump lips. You can’t remember the last time the two of you had studio sex, but you’re certainly craving his touch, his affection, and his love.

“Do you have time?” Your voice is already breathy and needy, praying he says yes so you can soothe the growing ache between your legs.

“Only about five minutes,” Jimin glances up at your kitty clock as he lifts you up from your chair and onto your desk. “But we can make it work.”

You watch as he rids you of your leggings and lace before running a pair of fingers up your thigh and along your soaked center. The intense sensitivity makes your entire body shutter with lust and anticipation as he brings himself closer to your erect little bud. But at the same time, you realize you would be the only one on the receiving end.

“Jimin… Let’s wait for a time when we both have more than five minutes,” you say softly as you close your legs, though you appreciate the boy’s thoughtfulness to satisfy your dire needs.

“It’s fine, Y/N,” he chuckles at your considerate gesture. “Besides, how’re you supposed to focus on work when you’re this wet?” He holds up his glazed finger tips to show proof of your sexual need before sucking them off. “Didn’t you say you work best after our little studio sessions?”

“Yeah, but…” you blush and pout, despite there being some truth in his words. There’s been plenty of times where you think you’ve lost all inspiration for a song until Jimin comes along to take your mind off work for just a little bit—sort of like a cleanse. Some of your greatest tracks have come after late nights spent with Jimin. But many of those nights didn’t even involve sex.

You hop your naked ass off the desk and push Jimin back into a chair with you on top of him. Your lips clash with his as you feel his grip tighten at your hips. “A makeout session will do for tonight,” you lick your lips, smiling at the boy. “I’d rather save the sex for a time when we have all night.”

“Quickies aren’t cutting it for you anymore?” Jimin asks between liplocks. You feel him getting hard through his sweatpants against your crotch.

“It’s not that,” you suck gently against his neck, just enough to get him to moan but not leave a mark. “I just don’t want to feel so rushed when I’m with you.”

“Oh? Is this a confession?” Jimin pulls away and smirks at you. “You enjoy spending time with me that much?”

“You can’t talk. You’re the one who always uses coffee as an excuse to visit my studio like twenty times a week.” Despite the defensive jab, your next peck is a soft one against the boy’s cheek. “But sometimes I just think about spending quality time with you outside of here…”

“Like dating.” Jimin’s smirk fades.

“I mean, I know we can’t, but-” You’re cut off by a long and tender kiss. It feels like forever before either of you pull away. And when you finally do, Jimin just stares into your eyes in silence.

“Anyway, I need to finish this song…” you say when you realize he can’t give you the reply you want. “… And you need to get home before the guys worry about you.”

You slip off of the boy’s lap to reclothe your lower half. He takes your hand as you walk him towards the door but stops you before you can turn the knob.

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” he says, looking down at your fingers interlaced with his. “I’m sorry I can’t give you the relationship you want…”

“It’s not your fault, Jimin. I don’t think you realize how much it means to me every time you drop by the studio. Even if it’s one time or twenty times a week.” You wish he wouldn’t always blame himself. If anything, you’re grateful that he takes time out of his busy day to spend with you. He dotes on you because he adores you. “We don’t need to date for me to know your feelings.”

“I’m glad,” he smiles with less worry. “But if you ever want to spend time outside of the studio, let’s hang out at the dorms, yeah? It could be like a mini date?”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to keep this a secret even from the guys?” you ask, even though you’d be delighted to have some Netflix and cuddle sessions with Jimin.

“If it’s just them, they’ll understand. You know how much they all love their cute songwriter,” he pinches your cheek. “Plus, they’ve been pestering me to ask you out for the past few months. You already have their approval.”

“I am cute, thank you.” You gloat in his compliment.

“You are.”

“But yeah, I’d love to visit you at the dorms, since you always visit me here~”

“…Should we start tonight?”

“Wow, someone’s eager,” you snicker. “I knew that bulge wasn’t just my imagination…”

“Y/N!” he whines at your teasing.

“I do still have a lot of work to do on this track, though.” You bite your lip, trying to come up with the best solution. “Will hanging out with you tonight spark any inspiration for my songwriting?”

“Possibly~” Jimin raises his eyebrows and widens his eyes. He knows that’s the expression that never fails to make you laugh. “And if not, I’ll spend the weekend being your coffee fairy until you finish that song.”

“Alright, alright,” you giggle at his funny face. “I’m counting on you, Mr. Coffee Fairy.”

[madiiko12]

new york’s very own madison ‘madi’ ko was spotted on broadway street in chanel sneakers . your resemblance to kim chungha is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty-first birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being obsessive , but also ambitious . i guess being a virgo explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be glittery eyes, dangling earrings, & chanel draped in pearls.  ( cisfemale & she/her) + ( kale, 20 , she/her , est. )

hi honeybuns !! im back and with child. there is a brief mention of an ed under the cut but i block it off with a tw start & end.    if you’d like to plot pls leave a like and i can dm you or hit you up on discord !! my discord is kale#3079  

BACKSTORY

haneul madison ko was born september 18, 1999 to two immigrant parents from S.K. her birth name is haneul, but she went by the name madison since it was easier to pronounce + madi began to almost detest her culture??

it was just that growing up she would sometimes get bullied for looking different at her school, for the way her packed lunches smelled/looked, the way people would stare if she spoke korean to her parents, how other kids would make fun of her english since she didn’t pick up on vocab/grammar as quickly since she didn’t practice at home with her parents. she just became SO insecure about it that she rejected her culture. she wouldn’t bring her mom’s food to school, if her mom ever forced her to take it she’d throw it away  and choose to starve instead. she wouldn’t speak korean back to her parents in public, barely even in private (which reeaaallly upset her parents). this also REALLY destroyed her korean language skills. she can understand still, but she can barely hold a basic conversation anymore.

as she grew up, and continued this sense of distancing herself from her culture, she ultimately distanced herself from her family. which left her feeling -  - alone often, even though it was all due to her own choices. in this loneliness, she found her escape in music. she would wear headphones constantly through the halls, in car rides, in her room when her parents yelled at her to turn the music down. she just loved music. she saved up the money her parents gave her whenever she worked at the nail salon (her parents owned it!!) to thrift an old keyboard. she became self-taught by trying to copy melodies of songs she’d listen to, thrifting piano lesson books, staying after school with the music teacher learning to play. sometimes she’d even skip lunch to sit in the chorus room with her choir director and play.

it’s not that she had a LACK of friends growing up, maybe just that she lacked a best friend. she had a lot of friends, but no one that she felt so connected to in the way she felt connected to music. perhaps, she was addicted to her loneliness.

she spent a lot of time playing the piano and dabbling in writing music that her grades started to fall (not that she was ever the BEST student) and her parents literally took away her piano. they said it was a waste of time because they wanted her to focus on doing well, so she could get into a good university, and then live a good life. music was just a distraction

but that didnt work

she would sneak out into the city to go to concerts and poetry readings. she’d sneak out and go to indie songwriters scenes while her parents thought she was at the library with one of her school friends

This underground scene had her full heart!! she was surrounded by likeminded people who just lived for music. she was hearing all of these incredible people who were all looking for their start. maybe not looking for anything at than just to sing their songs. tbh i think this was the point she was happiest. she was completely enveloped in music, just for the sake of music. There wasn’t any pressure, just music. Just the songs. she was wide eyed looking at this whole underground scene of artists. So maybe some plots from these underground charas?!

she’d perform some songs at karaoke nights and the indie sessions, and a producer took a keen interest in one of her songs. basically im kind of stealing halsey’s career start, but she posted a song Came in Close on SoundCloud and just blew up overnight. in the morning, she woke up to a record label asking her to fly to LA for a meeting.

and thus, Madison Ko began a career as Madi Ko where she’d release her debut album, Honey, a few months later. (DISCOGRAPHY HERE). her music is very 80s synth inspired!

new album that is most definitely CRJ’S EMOTION is coming soon...

PERSONALITY

right off the bat, madi is an absolute firecracker!! she’s loud, bursting with personality, has a lack of inhibitions that CHAOTICALLY mixes with her spontaneity

part of this is projecting her insecurities. she felt lonely as a child but doesn’t want to be seen as that to the world. it’s not so much a persona but an exaggeration of who she was. 

she likes to show off her glam bc it, once again, hides her insecurities. 

she just kind of is dramatic anymore

like everything about her

her persona as Madi Ko, upcoming popstar underdog, is like DUNKED in glitter, over the top stages and sets, draped in couture. basically her stages/outfits/dances/mvs are like Chungha’s but with Pale Waves and Carly Rae Jepsen VC. ex: 1, 2, 3, 4

also bc im obsessed with chungha’s famous diamond wink, IT’S GONNA BE MADI’S THING TOO. so basically madi has trended on twt a few times bc of her signature diamond wink bc she effing glues rhinestones and glitter under her eyes for performances !! she said fuck corneas !! ex: 1, 2, 3      ....god chungha is magical

so while madi is like a brand hypebeast n never shuts up, she can also get,,, easily annoyed. and heavily perceives ppl on first impressions despite that being the reason she felt misunderstood a lot growing up. 

definitely argumentative!!! will blow up arguments for no reason n then later questions why she made it such a big deal but cant own up to her mistakes

when she decides she doesnt like you, SHE DOESNT LIKE YOU. it’s done. bridge is burned, she’s not keen on second chances

fame has definitely given her a bit of an ego problem --- she’s a bit more aggressive, self-obsessed while intrinsically insecure, is too busy flaunting her material possessions and trendy life that she can...lose touch of reality. basically most of her high school friends cant stand her. HC that her high school bf broke up with her bc she was no longer was the madison ko he knew!!! so if anyone wants to be that ex lmk !!! she’s written songs about them!!!

definitely the type of girl who is so hype at a party, dancing in fallen confetti, standing on the fireplace mantle, but then midway realizes she’s lonely. sad at a party. 

ED TW STARTS!!!!!

....

she kind of always had body image issues growing up, but it was very off and on, but once she got signed and being by surrounded by cameras became normal she formed a full fledged ED. she’s passed out at concerts a few times bc of her ED, but they always brush it off as “not enough rest” or “she wasnt feeling well that day but pushed to perform anyway as to not disappoint the fans”

so feel free for ur muses to point it out !! she’ll get really defensive like “i eat i just work out a lot” and yeah it’s true she works out a lot but she...doesn’t really eat

it’s also one of the causes of her irritability ...

.....

END ED TW!!!!

idk why this is so long

always up for mischief! 

does love a good prank. asks weird hypotheticals 

is not scared of an ouija board

will get wasted off a few shots and drunk madi is UNSTOPPABLE 

one time drunk madi cried bc her siamese cat (MOCHI !!!) wouldn’t ever get to go to school and would never know chemistry..... the dramatics.....

she is sensitive and despises it. she does everything she can to not come across as sensitive

however, she’s so obsessive. so deep in feeling. when she feels something she FEELS it. when she is mad it boils through her. when she is in love it is all she knows. when she is sad it covers her like sweaters and blankets on rainy days. she doesn’t know how to half-feel. everything she feels stops her in her tracks.

HOWEVER she’s the most obsessive with her own insecurities — so in relationships she’s kind of known for tapping out early. she just gets scared and the fleetingness of her career and that she’s at her very core, lonely and disappointed in herself, makes her want to run away thinking that letting down her walls and being vulnerable could only be disappointing for her SO. so maybe she ghosted ur chara or gave some lame excuse

Kind of obsessed with how she’s perceived

terrified that at any moment her career could be thrown away, her deemed irrelevant, and she goes back to being Madison Ko, daughter of nail techs in Koreatown. and then her parents would have been right all along, music was a waste of time.

she’s just my little fallen angel who flew to the sun (fame) and it constantly eats away at her girlhood, at her heart.

anyways this is all i got rn <3 come love me sorry i kind of didn’t shut up this is long

WANTED CONNECTIONS

an ex from before she was famous who broke up with her because of how she changed!! PLEASE i have ideas for this. plus,,, you get a lot of songs about ur chara!!! could be from high school, maybe someone in the music scene she frequented before she was signed, anything!!

anothr ex/fwb/undefined relationship i’d love is one when she was first famous who just introduced her to everything. something like a whirlwind that was exciting and magical. she’s written songs about this person.

exes in general. 

hookups/fwb

romantic plots. pls i have songs who need meaning. friends to lovers, one sided (either way), slowburn, ANYTHING. love cruel summer plots, anything lover by tswift

PR relationships -- would LOVE one where she falls in love with the other despite how clearly defined they made their relationship

love triangles in general just get me going

best friend!!!! the one’s who know how the other feels just by looking at each other. they have countless sleepovers. tell each other everything. cry together on bathroom floors. pregame together. 

ex friends. for whatever reason -- maybe madi did smth shitty, maybe they did. maybe there was backstabbing, maybe madi sacrificed friendship for a career, maybe she made moves on their romantic partner/interest despite being fully aware. idk. gimme

People she knew from the underground/indie scene before they were famous!! they’d have bonded over their love for music, little indie dreams kind of vibe. just imagine a group of dreamers !! Would love if they made some kind of pact!!!

party friends

collabs !!

pranks. mischief. gimme

enemies. gotta cook up some drama, yknow

GIRL GANG. god i just want this so bad like make a girls dream come true

[hopeandharmonizing]

RP Plotting Sheet : Briar Rieka

Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted.

Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

tagged by: stole it from an old blog

Mun name: Rachel or Teceraca OOC Contact: Start with tumblr IMs. I have discord as well. Talk in the tags.

Who the heck is my muse anyway: 

Creeping up on middle-age, part-time Happy Huntress, part-time musical performer, wolf faunus lady who occasionally plays with gender presentation, mostly on stage. She has a painful past, but it only hardened her into a stronger, kinder self who wants to help everyone else to never hurt that badly, or at least not have to shoulder the pain alone. All she wants is to empower people, and yet all she seems to do it make them weaker and intimidated in her presence. Regardless, she continues to try and inspire through words and music, and protect through fists and claws.

Points of interest: 

black and white wolf tail, thorny vine tattoos wrapping most of her body, a semblance which cancels out others’ semblances, skilled in Aikido, guitar, keyboard/piano, and vocals. Graduate of Sanctum and Atlas Academies. Her huntress license lapsed after its first expiration date and remained that way for ~10 years until she reinstated at the behest of Robyn Hill. She will love you if you love yourself, and likewise do her best to truly scare the shit out of you if you mistreat others.

What they’ve been up to recently:

In mainverse, she’s living her best life in Mantle city, trying to bring hope to the masses and occasionally going on stake-outs for Robyn Hill or acting as entertainment or security detail for her rallies.

If you want to meet her somewhere in the past, you can find her either just looking to survive, mastering her music, or completing combat training followed by huntress training. then, trying but failing to work effectively as a licensed huntress, and slowly feeling like she’s lost herself before she finds music again.

Where to find them: 

In chronological order:

Morkmani Village Anima forests Argus Sanctum Academy Atlas Academy Mantle city  - wherever the work was   - performances at nightclubs, bars, street venues, coffee shops, etc  - libraries, cafes, anywhere she can sit and work on her stuff  - her apartment  - supporting other people’s shows! having fun in the crowds.  - out shopping, especially to add to/update her wardrobe with cool shit

Current plans:

make the world better! or at least feel like less of an oncoming storm. continue to be a badass? love as many people as she can. from a distance, usually.

Desired interactions:

WHEEZE. A lot of this is similar to the associations bit in my page but here we go.

Robyn recruiting her to join the huntresses, any and all shenanigans that may follow. Fraternizing with fellow huntresses in general, or missions together.

Qrow and/or Clover semblance shenanigans and training. Also her and Clover generally giving each other shit bc it is just So Much to have those two egos in one room.

Bitching at Ironwood about what trust and loyalty REALLY means or maybe just her venting to someone about him, but this requires her getting to know him somehow in the first place, or at least to hear from others what he is like. idk. this muse has meta feelings about micromanagement, I would love to thread them.

Giving Weiss vocal training classes when she was a lil’ girl. and/or catching up in current verse. 

Briar getting to meet Blake and absolutely gush about her speech at Menagerie bc she saw it from some scroll recordings.

Basically anything with Jaune. I still have no idea what is going to happen when these two semblances meet each other. I do know hers can basically act like a spiritual resistance weight to help his get stronger. It probably goes both ways. Semblance arm wrestling is what I’m sayin’. But also she just.......... she has a lot of feelings. It’s like a Qrow/Clover thing too where she looks at him and sees everything she could be, but isn’t. She’s too proud. Help her work through this and question herself a little bit so she can come out better for it, and realize they are both different yet who they are supposed to be.

Silver eyes training with Ruby!!!! She doesn’t know anything about them besides what she’d find out from the crew, but she does have plenty of skills and pep talks that can probably help Ruby focus and/or project her power. Briar's semblance color is silver for a reason.

Semblance/aura training with anyone in general. But when I say that I also mean “learning not to rely on your semblance” training. She’s good for that. She may get being a professor for it added to either her history or her future, idk yet.

This also leads into being able to have a discussion with Oscar/Ozpin about a different take that can help her fully realize her semblance abilities. If you’re interested, we can chat mun to mun so I can let you know my ideas and you can decide how your muse wants to guide her through it.

Other OCs idk who what where when why how but that’s exactly the point. the whole verse is our oyster, let’s see what happens. come @ me. let’s let our muses help develop each other.

Offered interactions:

Briar’s actually pretty easy to have interactions with villains? She probably won’t know any better if she runs into them and they aren’t immediately stirring trouble. For better or worse, she’ll give them the benefit of the doubt if they are trying to confide in her about something or just chatting.

Also I haven’t made one yet but she’d be damn good for a villain herself AU.

She will listen to you! She will sing to you!! She wants to make you happy and help you grow, plz come to her with whatever. (Or vice versa! She’s not difficult to get to open up and she will talk with you about her own doubts and demons if u want).

Anyone can watch one of her performances and/or come find her hanging around the venue afterwards. I’ll probably make some opens for this kind of thing.

Are you another performer character??? Duets??? duets.

Faunus mentor!! Music mentor!!

Sanctum or Atlas Academy student days can be a thing. Likewise for her more interspersed street performances during those times.

future volume interactions if you’re comfortable with hcs of what goes down until we find out canon. She can go after Robyn/Qrow in the immediate timeframe, or run into any of the kids in the process. I like to think she joins up with the main cast to head to Vacuo when that happens. Whether to just bring her music along for them and/or to start spreading it to more reaches of the world bc hopefully Atlas/Mantle is under control at some point and in good hands with Robyn and however that leadership shakes out, and damn the whole world needs hope right now, so it is... Time To Dream Even Bigger.

Current open post/s: 

here’s the open starter tag!

Anything else?:

I thought there was a shipping section on here but uhhhhhh i’m too much of a wuss to make one myself right now. maybe a bias list in the future. I feel like I should get some general interactions going first. 

Tagging: I’m not making anyone commit to this beast. If you want it, take it and most certainly blame me and tag me so I can read it.

[lanamemories]

hLO itsa me nai-io!!!!! (read shrieked in a high voice like mario if he buckled his dungarees too tight around the crotch)...... im sad i missed opening bt i had a pretty busy past 2 days so i didn’t hav any chance at all to b online bc i ws staying at a friends bt. anyway. excited to b here nw regardless of my Fashionably Late entrance. i’m 22 n live in manchester (the u freakin k Bay Bee) n cackle a little too mch like a witch fr supernatural suspicions nt to arise. thts all u rly need to kno. like this or hmu fr plots!! 

p.s. this is her pinterest for those of u tht like tht kind of thing

「 bridget satterlee. cis-female. 」have you seen lana jameson around yet? i hear SHE decided to be in ALPHA NU for their JUNIOR year as a DANCE major. the 21 year old SHEEP is known to be vivacious, alluring, childish and impulsive. ➨ the muse is written by nai. she is 22, in the gmt.

some random aesthetics: a red water pistol topped up with caribbean rum and covered in stickers of cartoon pin up girls, a vinyl record whirring silently because you got too distracted by a stranger’s hands to reach over and flip sides, giant inflatable flamingos floating in the aftermath of a pool party, smudgy lipstick kisses left like an autograph on someone else’s mirror, seventies platforms covered in bowie inspired lightening stripes, fanning the flush in your cheeks with a bright red flamenco fan in the back of a crowded lecture hall, michelangelo reminiscent statures clasping at their stone in suggestive places, bopping stranger’s on the forehead with heart shaped lollipops, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘SCRAPPY DOO IS A FILTHY SLUT’, lighting a paper lantern and saying “aw, how pretty,” only for the whole party to shriek as it crashes into a children’s tent in the next garden over, a ball point pen that turns a woman naked when you click up the nib, cackling so ferociously that you almost throw up and your ribs ache.

ok im a Lay Zee gorl n dnt wna waste any mre time redoin lana’s intro so im pastin in her old one so i cn hop right to interactions. the only thing i can think tht needs to b added is the stuff abt danny nielsen (an evil npc of mine bc im a sadist) who recently beat up zeke van doren (full name this is Official feel like im writin a journalist article) bc he found out him n lana slept tgether n her n danny were kind of dating if....u can call his idea of romance tht. danny is in custody nw bt its a whole Thing like.... is prob... known around lockwood bc it ws a pretty intense..... thing tht happened n danny ws quite a popular senior

grew up in a big house in albany, NY, bt also spent time all over the place n was in the city a lot

okay so her mum is an old money socialite / three time campaign model way back when n her dad is a big record label mogul. he owns a label called jameson records n they repped a few big rock bands back in the eighties, altho they’re mostly known for ‘poppy injects’ whose lead singer had a big heroin scandal tht brought down his career. lana p much grew up around musicians snorting lines instead of spooning down cereal fr breakfast n her parents were v much absent her whole life

they’re pretty well off obviously n bc of her relation to such a big music industry figure she’s hung out w a fair few relatively high rep ppl thru her teens. she amassed kind of an instagram following mainly fr her style (v penny lane-esque in some aspects aka lots of fur cuff trimmed jackets bt then also jst…. a wild combination of everything honestly. pastel faux fur coats, seventies style platforms, flame red cowboy boots, pink fishnet tights n glitter used like highlight Everywhere) n bc she’s undeniably very pretty

her parents always kind of jst… didn’t like her. it was v clear that she was an accident after her older brother caleb n that even when they just had him alone they weren’t cut out for parenthood. they always kind of jst… ignored her n hoped she’d go away. she had to mke herself microwave meals when she ws only like 12 bc they’d forget to get her anything. once she went like 6 days without her mum even looking her in the eyes once

despite this tho!!! she’s always been insanely close w her brother caleb. he’s her whole world. thts why when he decided to sign up to the army she ws understandably scared bt supported him after initially bein mad tht he ws leavin her all alone. bt then he wound up getting discharged under grounds of severe ptsd when he witnessed his best friend die in an explosion tht took place in a shock raid. caleb returned home n he was never the same n lana kind of felt like he’d died out there too. he’s in n out of hospital a lot n it’s rly hard on her bt she doesn’t tlk abt it to anyone rly

growing up lana was always a huge social butterfly. jst literally…. knew everyone n everyone definitely knew her. she ws one of those girls tht ws kind of impossible to ignore or forget. very animated, always made u feel like u were the centre of the universe whenever she spoke to u, always made it feel like u were best friends even if ud only spoken to her once. she has this magnetic way abt her tht is kind of hard to find in real life. it’s something ud only rly expect out of a movie character n she like. deliberately puts tht on sort of. kind of.... is always playing A Role of the person tht she wants to b seen as

she’s always been insatiably spontaneous n adventurous. always doing something weird n wild every weekend. she has ten thousand stories tht always earn a laugh or a gasp over how ridiculously absurd they r

anyway so after caleb got back he was rly withdrawn n depressed. he shut lana out n was kind of harsh to her a lot of the time, always telling her to leave him alone or pushing her away. it didnt help either tht lana had a rly traumatic experience w some of her dad’s colleagues at the label when she ws 16 n he was away n she cldnt even tell him abt it once he was bk bc of his own traumas. she kind of jst shut it all in n kept it to herself

this obviously?? made her spiral a lot. she was already a girl tht loved sex (she’d only rly done foreplay before tho) but since her trauma it got…. completely out of hand. it got to a point where she couldnt rly go 2 days without it, probably not even 1. her lowest point has probably been scrolling thru craiglist for anonymous encounters n meeting up w strangers on there fr a quick fuck jst for the thrill even tho it’s insanely dangerous n she cld wind up getting herself killed. it’s v clear at this point tht she has a sex addiction whether she’s ever admitted it or not

she also currently? is working as a cam girl. she found this website bc she trawls… porn stuff a lot n she wound up applying to work as one bc she thought it’d b fun n wld earn her some disposal income (even tho she frankly doesn’t need it bc she’s already well off). the guy tht manages all of the girls on the site is kind of suspect n it’s a whole plot i’m gna unravel where it’s actually like the front for a cult or something wild so. stay posted ig. kgjdkgjh

personality/some fun facts: uncontrollably flirty. boundlessly confident. cld make a joke out a paper bag n her comedy is sometimes surreal / absurd. she tends to laugh when she feels like crying n has a smile brighter than a ray of texas sunshine. always dapples her fingers thru the breeze when she’s driving in a car w the window down. her fav book as a child used to b alice in wonderland n she’d fantasise abt having her own little wonderland too where everyone knew her name n asked her things n took her on adventures. at the time it didn’t rly strike her how evident it was tht that was bc she was so lonely. she almost always has some sort of sweet on her, whether it’s strawberry laces or gummy bears or cherry lollipops. she adores david bowie n prince n madonna n anyone tht’s a vintage style icon w little care fr what ppl think. wildflowers r her favourites bc they’re the brightest and u can’t buy them. she’s had like 8472493874 ‘relationships’ n none of them hav lasted beyond a month / hav been terrible / hav seen her being treated badly / she’s cheated on them. i dnt think she’s actually been w anyone she hasn’t cheated on in some form or another

plot ideas: exes tht lana’s fucked over hideously. she’d probably cheat a lot and it’d be a whole…mess. mayb someone tht flipped the switch and cheated on her? a cousin plot cld b fun too. a friend tht lana fel out w bc she slept w their significant other. someone tht’s getting lana into drugs?? she’s kind of impressionable/down for anything so tht’s a likely scenario she’d get into tbh. an unrequited crush!! (either way is cool). someone tht is just hanging out w her/using her bc she has a lot of instagram followers or they want to b signed to her dad’s label. someone in a band!! she’d probably make like penny lane n b their groupie/sleep w them all fgjkshgkh. umm a good influence too mayb? oh and a past summer romance/fling tht cld either have meant a lot or not have meant anything at all. bonus points if both of them hav a diff viewpoint on it. honestly?? anything is fine i cld ramble for days

[jadevndermeer]

( dua lipa. 24. cisfemale. she/her. ) ❛ jade vandermeer, an aries from seattle, washington, moved into holloway three years ago. they are a musician that lives in apartment 5d here and their neighbors don’t particularly mind them. some say they can be volatile and impulsive but others say they’re bold and magnetic. anyways, one thing is for sure: you hear tongue tied by grouplove, it’s jadey-v blasting it.

INTRODUCTION : JADE VANDERMEER

hey! it’s ya girl jess & i’m here with my girl, jade. a little about me, in case you didn’t see my lil ooc intro in the discord – i’m 22 and in the bst timezone. i’m ur local bisexual aries disaster who is indie band trash & resides in rainy england. i played johnny before the revamp ( the nico mirallegro fc! ) and was also an admin for a lil bit. without further ado, here’s my babe!

my d*iscord is @ soft aries#7087 & i prefer to plot there over IMs!

jade’s pinterest board can be found here!

BACKGROUND

jade is the daughter of two business-people. the pair of them strict & straight as a line for her whole childhood. she was born in seattle, but since her father is dutch (hence her last name) and her mother is albanian, the family spent a lot of time travelling to their respective homelands, which was just about the most fun she had as a child. when at home in baltimore, she was kept under close supervision as her parents were the typical snobby, superficial semi-wealthy types and way too overprotective.

leaving the states for long periods at a time made it somewhat hard for jade to keep a friendship group, so she found fun in things that she could do alone like songwriting, singing and learning to play bass guitar. these were just hobbies at first until she entered her mid-teen years and began to take it more seriously, knowing she had the talent to do so. 

music forced her to come out of her shell massively. it gave her the confidence to. kids at school would want to hear her play all the time, and she was happy to show off her talents to others, which helped her to make friends

of course, around this time is when she developed a taste for fun. she wanted to hang out and go to parties and stuff like a normal teenager but again, her parents were still being way too strict & sheltering her

so she had to make do with sneaking out when she could, and when she couldn’t go have fun she continued to refine her passion as a musician, starting to post covers & original songs to youtube and bandcamp & even managing to get quite a substantial fanbase

however, her parents weren’t happy with this. they thought that music wasn’t a real job and that she needed to follow in the family footsteps and work towards being employed by their business. so, they made sure to only extend the offer of financial support through college if she promised to study business, marketing or something similar. and so, she had no choice but to agree to their ultimatum

she began studying at a university in new york, with a degree in business management. of course — she hated it. her studies didn’t align with her passion and so, to the dismay of her parents, she dropped out only a year and a half in. 

it was around this time that jade’s parents figured out that she was going to pursue the music thing no matter what and she wouldn’t be working for the family business. their ultimatum had technically failed, and jade was worried about potential problems between herself and her parents if she were to go back to seattle. and so, the search for a roommate in new york started. she moved into holloway as a matter of urgency

she could finally focus on being herself and taking up music as her full-time focus. there was an issue though, she needed a band. though, that issue was solved when she got together with some fellow holloway residents to form the indie rock band solar eclipse. with jade on bass, of course !!

jade worked as a barista and spent any free time she had working on music with solar eclipse. over the past few years, they’ve managed to take off quite a bit — they’ve signed to a record label, so jade quit her barista job and the band started to work on an album! everything seems to be falling into place.

PERSONALITY

fiery aries lady. aka charismatic and magnetic but do not cross her bad side sksksk

comes across kind of self-centred / vain but really she’s just super proud of herself and has a lot of self-confidence?

very all or nothing. doesn’t like to half-ass things. v determined and inspired at all times

can be a lil intense but is high-key lovely, v sweet and loyal, cares about her friends so much

she has a very strong personality and can be a bit of a liability. does a lot of things she regrets. doesn’t always think before she speaks

impulsive and unpredictable, she’s one of those extroverts that can become draining to be around after a while. she’s so talkative and excitable, a little too much. your muse may find her annoying or endearing depending on what they’re like

a bicon ( shocker.... not )

hopeless romantic, idealist / optimist, quixotic type.

aesthetics: yellow, converse high tops, vinyl pressings of all great indie records, denim mini skirts, mischievous grins, gold glitter

i’m gonna stop here bc i reallllly wanna jump into some plotting !

SUGGESTED CONNECTIONS

best friend(s) — it’s probably a given that this is taken up by her bandmates but i’m open for her to have more too! only requirement for this is that they vibe well with her personality!

past college friend(s) — friends she met at college before she dropped out. maybe they drifted after she left & now they’ve graduated and their friendship will rekindle in holloway?

bad influence — jade is a mischievous little binch. loves to party, go on wild spontaneous adventures, still has a rebellious streak thanks to growing up with strict parents. this person is a bit of a partner in crime for jade, always convincing her to join them in doing dumb shit

good influence — maybe another musician who mentors her as well, but this isn’t required? basically just anyone who can keep her grounded when her [ jenna marbles vc: ARIES ] energy causes her to wild out 

exes (on good or bad terms) — i love angst k thanks. if they’re on good terms, maybe they stayed friends & they’re still in love w jade but she doesn’t know ? if it’s bad terms maybe the relationship ended rly messily or they cheated on her and now they can’t stand each other, idc just gimme angst

a slow burn love interest — i’m not a fan of ship plots that happen right away like??? i like a cute plot that can build and develop for a while !! gimme a lil somethin somethin. our characters have to really work together for this tho so ig i’ll be picky when it comes to this plot

anything honestly!! hmu and if none of these appeal to you we can brainstorm!

[tvmblrsillyman]

usually i’d either have a shitpost-y caption or none at all when it comes to posting these random one off doodles but here I’ll record this weird personal Epiphany/self reflection that i had while drawing these two below the read me.

these aren’t great but like,,,gesture wise I think it looks great

most of my artworks lately have felt more lazy and in lesser quality, while it’s true that i’ve been trying ton converse as much energy for more important works theres also the same problem where i get super into a doodle i really like and i end up working more on that then the drawings i need to do. 

however even w/ simpler doodles felt like more effort than necessary and like, compared to somewhere around 2016-2017 where i was pushing my art sometime 2018-19 i feel like im starting to falter behind. of course this is my mind blaring the “DO YOUR STUDIES” alarm but also im like, still struggling to properly manage my time and prioritization. even now when i have much more time i still struggling to keep up w/ little responsibilities i have. (and honestly im kinda grateful its like. not as bad but im like too much of a disaster of a human being to keep my shit together sdgjksdgsdf)

lmao i’ve already forgot most of whatever i was going to type but i most certainly feel like i should start pushing myself and my art more and I’ve said this already 1000 times but I want to get better, i only wish i had that motivation/inspiration last longer than 20 minutes. sgjksdf

also here’s like the og tags of this post that turned into a rant/vent/a log of my thoughts:

#my mind is really weird bc like. ive been doing a lot of research on adhd lately since ive noticed i related to a good handful experiences #but also apparently everyone experiences w/ adhd is different and i've only seen myself struggling in only a handful of areas #like i dont rly know the threshold of what is normal thing that happens and a not so normal thing #since it seems like im edging between normal and not normal #like right in the middle where that line stands#and its still taking an impact of my life #it could also be myself doubting myself since i feel fake if i self dx myself w/ adhd 

#mood as ive already taken around 3-ish hours researching this and then done it again now for another hour#i'm still not sure -_- (as again i've noticed i relate to a handful of other ppl's experiences but also i feel like theyre not severe enough#my symptoms are not severe enough i mean. my bad#i said earlier that ive been on the edge but also taking more time to think about ive always had problems w/ scaling/deciding the severity#of my experiences since im not sure if im over selling it or under selling it#since i tend to do both. like No In Betweens#anyways sorry to rant abt this fdgjkhdfhsdfgd

[edelwary]

when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.

REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS : 

TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part 

mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah : 

I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !

around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x) 

For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!

Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls). 

I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !! 

Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper) 

This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING. 

And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there. 

Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is

 HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW : 

I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why : 

You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3) 

You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved

It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong

Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones. 

Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.

I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage. 

You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you. 

Use. References. 

Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support. 

I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff ! 

Make it harder. 

No eraser. 

Paint. 

I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds. 

Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.

And if you make mistakes :

New page, restart

It’s okay

It’s for you

I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades 

You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit

Draw as large as you can 

There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines

Thin lineart helps

Thinner. Make it even thinner

Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art 

Big lineart ? Why not

Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty

Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think 

Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great. 

Don’t be afraid to do nothing

Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know… 

Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :

Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style

Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back

Take breaks. Breath. 

Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different

I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard 

But I really, really think it’s worth it 

MOTIVATION :

My main bitch 

I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-

Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work

Actual advices : 

I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later

Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic. 

Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.

Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf. 

Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool. 

Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT. 

Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry. 

Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more

Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF 

Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford 

MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol) 

Prompts blogs are cool too 

Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !

That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT

Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it

Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see. 

Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you. 

Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer 

Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it. 

FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one. 

Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them. 

WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!! 

[absolutelybifurious]

homecoming feelings inc (spoilers: most of them will look something like i love tony stark i LOVE tony stark i loVE TONY STARK I LOVE ad nauseum) 

peters video recording of civil war what an absolute babe

“thats not a hug im reaching for the door” (yeah right tony we all know you crave human contact)

why does peter know spanish?

peter taking time to pet the cat *_*

peter desperately looking for ways to help and giving that lady directions,,,, my son

“why did i mention the churro”

peter saving the cat and handing it back to the shop owner LIKE OH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDDD I LOVE HIM 

michelle doing situps with her book

no one will convince me flash doesnt have a massive gay crush on peter parker yall, i mean cmon?? HE MAKES EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM CLASSIC CRUSH SIGNS,,, hes legitimately obsessed with him, like i’m not kidding i can’t remember the specifics but several times i was like ok this is just kinda coded like hes into peter actually?

“you’re here too” “am i?” truly the best scene in the film michelle is a gift and zendaya is our glorious goddess who has bestowed this wonder on us

god the van scene, i immediately loved donald glover but that could be bc hes cute. but the thing is, this movie did such a Job of making peter immature. like i was continuously frustrated with him bc he was so markedly different and less mature than any of the other heroes. he screwed up again and again and again and the kidness of him was so well done. like it infuriated me half the time. but damn it was well done

TONY INSTALLED A HEATER IN PETERS SUIT

TONY WAS PAYING SO MUCH ATTENTION TO PETER THAT HE NOTICED WHEN THINGS WENT POORLY

TONY LISTENED TO THE PROBABLY HUNDREDS OF REPORTS PETER SENT AND REMEMBERS THE FUCKING CHURRO

tony wants to talk to peter about his college plans

tony stark is the best dad ever, and really in general he is the best person ever and no one will ever tell me that there is a person with a better heart in the MCU BECAUSE THERE IS FUCKING NOT 

TONY STARK IS TOO GOOD FOR ALL OF US WE DO NOT DESERVE HIM

poor ned :( “that hats not working” i was really mad at peter for the way he kept ditching all hsi real life friends

kinda glad vulture killed that guy what a disrespectful douche

“i thought that was the anti gravity gun” “wHAT NO” hmMmMmMm I LOVE

also he treats his other ppl with a lot of respect and later the ppl still think they can leave and like, thats cool

michelle noticing what peters quit already

i have a hot date with black widow later

that is false

another long one: i didnt super buy peters crush on liz. it felt really faked because he never really made choices for her, and i get that he was more into spiderman but i never felt the significance of the crush... i think that was played over a little bit too much

also i dont think ive been this impressed with a villain in the marvel franchise since loki. vulture was so compellingly realistic. i know they tried that shit with whats his face from civil war but he was so irrelevant i didnt care. vulture was relevant, scary, but also emotionally compelling

fucking taser web

you jumped off the sign and landed on your face

i love karen

i read a post about tony coding an AI thats emotionally encouraging and invested in peters life bc tony is invested in peters life and like iw ant to die

i just dont want to celebrate something built by slaves

THE GUARDS LIKE PREACH

michelle is a gift

“kiss her peter”

“thank you”

donald glover I HAVE A NEPHEW YEEEEEEEEEE BOY GIVE ME MILES I DESERVE IT

the whole interrogation scene was golden,,,, “NEVER DO THAT AGAIN KAREN” 

you’re a criminal!!! you deserve it!!!!!!!!!!!!! bye!! criminal!! i love peter so much

TONY STARK CALLING TO TELL PETER WHAT A GOOD JOB HE DID IN DC TONY STARK BEING A SUPPORTIVE, GOOD PARENT AND WANTING TO MAKE SURE PETER KNOWS HE IS PAYING ATTENTION 

peter just keeps causing disaster after disaster 

that whole ferry scene had me cringing

but he tried so hard to help everyone!!

tonys anger after it was totally warranted. i dont blame him for taknig the suit. 

MY FAVORITE LINE: if you really cared you’d be here AND TONY MOTHERFUCKING STEPS OUT OF THE SUIT

and god rdj brings the fuCKING PAIN you can see how panicked he is how muc hhe doesnt want to hurt peter but how SCARED he is bc peter isnt listening to him and god!!! what if something happened to peter!! you can hear the self loathing and the pain that hes carrying from all the other movies all he wants to do is make sure nothing happens to peter or anyone else

tony listened to peter to try and stop the vulture, tony takes him seriously!!!!!!!!!!! tony is such a good dad and such a good person and HOLY SHIT!! TONY STARK!!!!!!!!!

hes hurting so much in that scene he doesnt wanna be like howard HE DROPPED EVERYTHING TO GO HELP PETER IM UNDONE

also look how well peter got back on track after he lost the suit

still ??? at the liz scene tho?? i just didnt feel that relationship much at all, there wasnt anything there

PLOT TWIST PLOT TWIST PLOT TWIST 

MMMM THATS SOME GOOOOOOD SHIT 

and once again vulture is incredibly compelling bc that brings a whole new context to why his face changed re: dc and why he didnt try to kill peter on the ferry

michelle doing the casual flip-off, god i love her so much??

holy shit peter in the wreckage, tom holland go off that acting tore my heart in half AND THEN HE REMEMEBRED TONY WORDS

CMON SPIDERMAN I AM SOBBING

FLASH ASKING DO YOU REALLY KNOW PETER PARKER HES IN LOVE

vultures desperation in this final scene is,,,wow, you fucking feel it, it makes sense. hes such a compelling villain.

peter saving vulture what a fucking babe

liz really is a sweet girl i wish i’d believed the crush more bc she deserves all the love

my friends call me mj YISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS gimme that michelle/peter RN

michelle acting like she doesnt care and then THAT LOOK THAT LOOOOK OMG ZENDAYA KILLED ME HOW DID SHE CONVEY SO MUCH ACTUAL LOVE AND COMPASSION AND CRUSH 101 IN A 2 SECOND CLIP YALL

happy in the bathroom. goodbye to me.

can we talk about tony? being so ecstatic that peter did all this? tony saying thatw as the tough love moment you needed and being so convinced that it wasnt and so convinced by his own acting that he could never actulally ahve inspired anything like that so hes just going to blaze ahead and not even acknowledge that yes!! it was actually!!!!!!!! he was a great father figurei n that moment and in this whole movie 

but he doesn’t believe that so he’s just going to keep being sarcastic to cover up for the fact that he doesnt think any of this had almost anything to do with him and everthing to do with peter

bc he has no concept of his own self-worth and yet to contrast that he directly inflates it and is so used to ppl disregarding it and accusing him of having an ego that even in this moment when he does something really amazing he makes it about his fake-ass ego and doesn’t let anyone actually give him credit for anything bc he is too busy giving himself fake-credit that he uses as an excuse in every other scene to call himself a piece of shit,,, that other ppl use to call him that bc ppl cant see through it bc he doesnt actually WANT anyone looking too closely, and yet, in this scene, he seems to be using it to exempt peter from actually acknowledging what he did was good bc hahaha im a self-congratulatory egomaniac

anyway hahahaha i love tony stark

also he is sad, he wants peter to stay with him, but he lets it go bc he recognizes it was the mature choice (and probably not the one he’d ahve made) 

hes so proud of peter i want to die

PEPPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE RING!!

they’re both so confused about happy and the ring i love it

PEPPER!!!!!!!!! THEY’RE BACK!!!!!!!!! THANK FUCKING JESUS BC IF SOMEONE DIDNT LOVE TONY STARK IN THIS DARK TIME THEN IW OULD HAVE FOUND A WAY TO BREAK INTO THIS FICTIONAL REALM AND DO IT MYSELF

that little kiss was everything she lvoes him i love them

ugh

this movie was gr8 a++++

i love my son tony stark and his son peter parker and his future wife michelle

[gukiee]

Spread Friendship And Love 🌸 Give a shout out to 5 of your irl friend or mutuals and say why you love them! Send this to 10 other people once your done 🌼

Lmaooo OH boy okay have fun w/ this

@bluekyun SO I’m sure u already know my feelings 4 u since im emo almost every day of my life BUT i’m gonna tell u again anyways. I’m kind of surprised by how quickly we became really close and how much we have in common i swear to god we’re the same person it’s almost weird @ this point. The fact that you’ll watch all my conspiracy/murder videos n talk to me about it like wow queens of friendship can u believe. You’re the one person I talk to from the second I get up to the second I go to sleep and honestly idk what I would do without you. You’re always able to calm me down when im having a bad day and are one of the only people who can still manage to make me smile n laugh when I’m at my lowest. every time i talk to u my heart quickens a little bit because you’re such an amazing person and will ALWAYS put others before yourself even if you’re drowning in your own stuff. You’re one of the most selfless, thoughtful people I’ve ever met in my life and I’m so thankful to have you. ALSO your writing is phenomenal? you put SO much time and effort into everything you do and are so hard on yourself it’s actually really inspiring to me and pushes me to always work harder and do my best. If I could put even HALF of the time, effort, n heart that you do into things I’d get so much accomplished. Thank you for being such an amazing bestfriend I truly love you with every single inch of my heart 

@hyungsk marissa...... my angel..... my lov... honestly together we’re the sour patch kids bc ur honestly my bitter queen n if i ever need to rant i know i never need to filter myself around you because ur just as bitter as I am and will always listen n be understanding (you’ll also make me feel better when ppl r doing me dirty smh). You’re SO easy to talk to and make me so happy. Honestly like? it was meant to be considering we were reach other’s valentines before we were even friends like? queens of friendship? wow. Even tho u think ur bad at expressing emotions you’re always so so so good to me and are really a lot more kind hearted than I think you even know. I lov u lots!!!!

@floral-hobi DANI okay wow u r? the sweetest honestly wow I love being friends with the sun. You always tag me in some good guk and yoonseok posts and every time I see you in my notifs I get really excited. I’m really so thankful that we actually talk now because I feel like you’re someone I can go to if I need a pick me up or if I’m having a long day because you’re honestly? So refreshing. You make me feel SO good about myself n give me so much happiness. I love reading ur tags when u reblog stuff from me u honestly make me laugh so hard (tbh we’re talking as i’m writing this and i’m laughing as we speak). I lov u so much i’m really thankful we’re friends!!! Thank you for always listening to me and cheering me up after long work days! 

@1una CARLY MY ANGEL honestly ur so fun to talk to (even tho we don’t talk much because school/work plus timezones ugh) BUT whenever I talk to you I always laugh so hard. You’re another person who is SO understanding n ur also a lil petty like me when it comes to things n I feel like I can talk to you about literally anything n you’ll always listen (like when we talk abt gg’s and shitty record labels lmaooo). You always tag me in SUCH sweet posts n r the only person who tags me in dog pictures/videos n I’ll forever be grateful for that. You’re SO friggin beautiful it’s unreal like i love being friends with a queen??? i lov u! 

@taekookiesandcream kia you are !!!!! so great honestly, I know I don’t tell u enough and I’ve been really busy so I’m sorry for that but you’re honestly such a good friend? you hype me up SO much my heart is always so warm talking to u. your snapchats always make me laugh SO hard n the memes we send each other are sgfhjkdgf too much. The fact that you message me to check up on me when I’ve been a little MIA is so thoughtful and I really appreciate it more than you know. You’re so kind hearted n gentle n silly I love you so much. Thank you for putting up with me even when I’ve been super busy and haven’t had the chance to speak to you as much! I promise I think of you daily and love u a lot!!!

@jungkookio okay ik it said 5 but i needed to add u in here because ur so gr8 omg dghfjk I remember I used to look at ur blog from afar and always think abt how cool u were and how I wanted to be ur friend. Now that we snapchat n speak more regularly i really honestly wouldn’t trade you for the world! Even if we don’t talk much I honestly appreciate you so much. You’re SO pretty omg dshgfj every time u tag me in a selfie game I honestly die, you’re also so sweet and kind like you rly have a heart of gold and I’m so thankful to have u in my life

SO ya anyways I’m sorry I haven’t been around as much BUT I love u guys all so much wow okay