#anyways i just wrote a couple hundred words for a fic that's been in the works for way to long(like a fukcin year) LOL

[alliumbunny]

sometimes i love writing and sometimes it brings me physical pain

[da-rulah]

i’m so happy you’re requests are backkk!! and that you’re back safe from your trip!

could i have some copia hc about him having an s/o or crush who LOVES writing, like they have whole shelves of notebooks and everything. would he try to read their stuff? stuff like that!

thank you i hope you’re doing well!

Thank you, lovely! They are for the time being - I'm going to be writing another fic soon so that'll take priority over any new requests but I'm still happy to take them ofc!

And I am doing well, thank you! My trip was good, but exhausting... 5 days of conferences and 10 working days in a row is not my idea of fun, but I've got a couple of extra days off now to compensate. So of course, I'm writing...

Anyway - onwards with the HC! This will be extremely self-indulgent seeing as you literally are describing me lmao

When you'd first met the cardinal, it had been in the library. You'd stumbled upon his little back office where he restored old books and ancient texts day to day.

You'd only been looking for some reference material, still new to the ministry and unfamiliar with the library's layout. But he was happy for the company, effectively guiding you to the section of the library you needed while conversing about what you were writing.

He offered you the spare desk in his little office, to use when you needed a quiet space free of the expectation to be social in another's company while you could focus on your writing.

You would use it often, and you got to know Copia quite well over time.

The longer you shared an office, the bigger your collection of notebooks with ideas, mind-maps, character profiles and plot plans gathered on the shelves behind your desk. Rows upon rows of notebooks...

He would nag you to let him read something of yours some time, but you'd wave him off with an "it's not ready yet..." But he'd never stop asking. One day you'd let him...

"Please, just a chapter? Will you let me, just once cara mio?"

And you did. Eventually, you let him read the book you had typed on your typewriter over the span of the last six months. He laughed. He cried. He fell in love. With the book, but also... with you.

The way you wrote, it was like the words sang to him. Your mind was truly as beautiful as your physical self. How could he not fall for you?

But he kept this to himself, for fear of frightening you out of this tiny little office and risk not seeing you every day.

Eventually, your birthday came around, and Copia had prepared something so special for you...

Whilst you had slept, he had snuck back into the office and worked all night.

Using his talent for book restoration, he had bound the hundreds of loose pages of your novel into a stunning original hardback book, crafted himself.

The cover was so ornate, so beautifully designed with references to the story itself in the red embossed artwork.

When you had opened it, he was terrified. What if you hadn't wanted it to be bound? What if you weren't totally done with it?

But, oh, how you wept.

It was the most beautiful, most thoughtful gift anyone had every given to you. He had handled your work with the care and affection that you had poured into it whilst writing it.

The same care and affection, it would seem, he had for you.

That night, after celebrating your birthday with him at a dinner he had prepared himself, you had confessed to him that the love interest of your novel had taken on the traits you had seen in him.

"What... what do you mean?" He had been so confused at first.

"I guess... what I'm trying to say, is that... He became you. And I think I fell for him..."

He had kissed you when you confessed, relieved to have his feelings reciprocated.

Years on, even in his now papacy, the two of you shared that office when he had some free time.

And somehow, he still always managed to find the time to bind the first drafts of your manuscripts together for you, to then ship to your publisher as a fully fledged published author now.

With the same care and affection as that first binding, you now had a collection of manuscripts you kept for your own personal memento collection.

Just as he would bind your books so beautifully together, you were now bound to each other. Forever.

[solitaireships]

Shared Stories

One of the biggest things I considered with what character I wanted to have as my official romance in VG was some of the dynamics that I would hopefully be able to play out in game with Minala. And one of the biggest things I considered making her was how she was an elf raised by humans, which meant there was a kind of distance for her from elven culture growing up. And that was something that I carried over into my views of her dynamic with Bellara, and how there's this kinda exchange going on between them that comes from Bellara being very in touch with elven culture while Minala is more distant from it

Anyway, here's a fic I wrote about that and also Minala and Bellara getting together

Rating: Gen

Genre: Fluff

Words: 1715 words

Divider by saradika

When Minala comes into Bellara’s room, she’s in the middle of working on some kind of elven artifact that she can't identify. She always seems to find something to keep herself busy with, making things that haven't seen use in hundreds of years work like new again, studying them to figure out how they work.

The curiosity that no doubt drives Bellara is part of what brings Minala to her now. Minala was never raised around many elves. There were some in the Grand Necropolis that would share what they could with her, but even then, their knowledge on elven culture was shaped by living in the city. Humans pushed conformity on them over the centuries, keeping them from their traditions and gods. It was the Dalish who were the keepers of ancient elven culture, and Minala had few opportunities to ever talk to them. The Dalish rarely ever visit cities, and they had even less of a reason to walk among the dead of the Necropolis. Minala could scrap together bits of Dalish culture from books and the rare person from one of the clans she met, but never enough to feel like she's actually learning what she should be doing as an elf.

Now though, she’s working with two Dalish elves. She wonders what it must be like for the two of them to learn not just the truth about their gods, but now have to get ready to fight two of them. It doesn’t seem like Davrin cares much, but Minala notices how Bellara still almost says the Dread Wolf sometimes. Between being Dalish and being part of the Veil Jumpers, she has to have been steeped in elven culture and history for years. And now she’s finding out what she had believed in her whole life is wrong. 

It’s hard to find the right words to comfort Bellara. She doesn’t seem to want to talk much about it either from any time that Minala has tried to. But one thing she knows about Bellara is she likes to talk about the things she’s been working on, and she likes talking about Dalish culture. If nothing else, Minala can probably help to keep the stress of things off her mind while also sating her own curiosity about where she came from. 

Plus, it’s nice to get to visit with her. Bellara’s room has been shaping up since she got to the Lighthouse. It started with just a couple of small things, but she’s slowly started to bring along more, setting up an assortment of trinkets and tools around the room. It looks nice, a little cluttered, but it has a homey feel to it.

When the door swings closed behind Minala, Bellara’s adorably lost in thought, eyes narrowed and nose scrunched as she looks over the artifact, mumbling to herself. She only notices Minala when she’s just behind her chair, clearing her throat. She jumps a little, but smiles when she turns around to see Minala. 

“Oh! Hi! Sorry, I didn’t hear you come in,” she says, tucking a bit of hair behind her ear. 

“And I’m sorry for bothering you when you were in the middle of something,” Minala replies. 

“It’s no big deal, don’t worry! Were we going to head out? I’ll be good to go in a minute or two,” Bellara asks. 

“No, not yet, at least. I was just wondering if maybe you could tell me some more about elf stuff,” Minala says.

“Elf stuff? What kind of elf stuff?” Bellara asks.

“Ah, I don’t know,” she admits. She hadn’t really thought much about the specifics of what to ask. It’s hard to when she feels like there’s so much that she never learned. “I don’t really know much about Dalish things.”

“Oh, yeah, you were raised in the city, right? So you probably don’t know a ton,” Bellara says. Her eyes widen when she pauses, quickly adding, “Not that that’s a bad thing! I mean, it’s different, but you not being Dalish isn’t bad. It’s great, actually!”

Minala can’t help but smile a little at that. It’s not a sentiment that many have, though she supposes that’s part of what she likes about Bellara. “Thanks. It’s not just that I grew up in a city, though, I was raised by humans.”

“Right.” Bellara pauses. “So, wait, sorry, how much do you know? About elven culture and history and that kind of thing?”

“Pretty much the stuff that everyone knows. I’ve done some research into other parts of it too. Holidays, traditions, that kind of thing. But there’s only so much you can learn in a city and without any other elves to really teach you that kind of thing.”

Minala’s disappointment in the fact must come through to Bellara, because she stands up from her seat to be closer to her. For a moment, she thinks she’s about to reach out to take her hand, though it seems she changes her mind about doing that at the last minute.

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a start, right? And don’t worry, I love getting to talk about this kind of thing, so I’d be happy to help fill in some of the gaps,” Bellara says. “Maybe too many of them. You know— me and all my rambling, right?”

“I like it when you ramble,” Minala says. It’s nice to hear her voice, and even more so to hear her be happy about something.

“Oh. Thanks!” Bellara says, a hint of awkwardness tinging her voice but a smile on her face.

Minala tries not to let herself get too caught up in how cute Bellara is. It’s strange to feel her heart practically skip a beat at her reaction to being complimented, and to think of how much she wishes she could keep seeing that pretty smile on her face. She would gladly listen to Bellara talk for hours, even if she does get off track. It would just be nice to get to be with her. 

“Ooh, wait,” Bellara says. “You like stories, right? If you want, maybe I could try to write down some old Dalish fables for you to read. Given everything with Solas and the gods, I don’t know if they’re as true as I used to think they were, but still. They might be a fun thing for you to read, and maybe give you some of your own story ideas.”

“If it’s not too much trouble,” Minala says. It’s not as if everyone at the Lighthouse isn’t busy in some way or another. They all have their obligations outside of just going out and trying to stop the gods. 

“Oh, not at all. It’ll be fun to do,” she replies. 

“Maybe we can do a trade? I can give you some of the stuff I’m working on writing-wise for you to look over, and you can give me some Dalish fables,” Minala suggests. At least then she won’t feel like she’s asking Bellara to do too much, though it does flatter her to think that she’d be willing to help out for nothing in exchange.

The idea of a trading stories seems to make Bellara excited though, her eyes lighting up. “That’d be really fun! We could make it kind of like a mini book club, outside of the one we do with the others.”

“Then it sounds like we’ve got a date.” The words slip out before Minala can realize what she’s saying. When she does process what she just said, a wave of embarrassment washes over her. “Well, not an actual date. But I— you know what I mean.”

“Right. It’ll be fun, though. Just… a fun thing for two friends to do,” Bellara says. 

But Minala swears she sees Bellara’s face turn just the slightest bit red. Normally she wouldn’t read too much into it, dismissing it as no more than her looking for a reciprocation of her feelings and seeing something that’s not really there. But Bellara blushing at the thought of a date is just about as clear of a sign she might be interested in Minala as she could get. 

“Exactly,” Minala says with a nod. She takes a breath before continuing, trying to build her courage. “If you wanted it to be an actual date, though, it could be.”

“Oh.” Bellara’s face only seems to get redder, and she looks from Minala down to her desk, then back to Minala. Her mouth opens and closes a couple of times, like she wants to say something but isn’t sure what. 

It’s a rare sight to see Bellara at a loss for words. Minala doesn’t know whether to feel proud of herself or sorry that she flustered her so much. 

“It can just be something we do as friends, though,” Minala reassures. “Whatever you want.”

“No, no— I would like it to be an— an actual date,” Bellara says. “I just… are you sure that’s what you would want?”

“Absolutely,” Minala replies. There are few things she’s more sure of. 

“Oh,” Bellara repeats, nearly falling as she sits down and tries to lean with one arm on the edge of her desk. “Right! Well, I also want that! A lot. And I’d really like to do more with you. Maybe— I don’t know, it’s been a while since I’ve actually, um, been in any serious relationships.”

“It’s been a bit for me too,” Minala says. 

“Well, that’s good then at least. That both of us haven’t been in anything serious for a while, I mean.”

“Right. And we can figure out what things are for us together.”

Bellara smiles. “That sounds nice.”

“And maybe share some stories with each other in the meantime?” Minala suggests. 

“I’ll make sure to put together some for you,” Bellara promises. 

“Which I’ll be looking forward to as I put together some things for you to read,” Minala says. “So I guess I’ll let you get to it?”

“Thanks. And we can share whatever we put together over dinner maybe? I don’t know, the last time I was doing this was in the middle of Arlathan, so we didn’t exactly have a lot of nice dinner options,” Bellara says. 

Minala smiles. She’s cute when she starts rambling. “Sounds like a date.”

[larkral]

Oh, hello. Wednesday, huh? Thanks for the tag @artsyunderstudy !!

SO this week I have been doing MANY THINGS including many fannish things. Including things in several fandoms. Me earlier this year: I truly cannot handle having more than one thing on the go. Me now: Yes, maybe I do have six active writing projects in three different fandoms as well as four podfics on the go. WHAT OF IT!?

I've finished recording all of my podfics, and I'm editing them now and... well, it's hard. One is edited, one is 1/8th edited, and the other two are freefloating audio. But, uh, yeah, here's some audio. Because. I... well, you'll get it.

Yes, I titled this file TENDER because I just, it's... yeah. I'm not totally sure whether I'm allowed to say who/what I'm podficcing... (@caught-on-tape-fest can you advise?) But, anyway, probably someone will get it based on that snippet.

Below the cut: snippets of writing and tags!

Here, also, is a little, silly segment of my OMGCP fic, the Holsom Timeloop, featuring an OC who, let me just say, I gave excellent breasts, and zero flaws. I will accept no critiques:

He bumps into someone as he turns, attempts to keep anyone from falling with one hand in the steadying region of what should be a shoulder but turns out to be a truly exceptional handful of cleavage.  "Shit, I'm so sorry," he says, taking a half-step back and looking at the woman he just groped.  There's a lovely flush on her olive cheeks, and her hair is a cloud of beautiful, wild curls.  Marjorie. She's in his o-chem class and she's cute. She's been cute all semester. And smart. And funny. Though her typical cozy-sweater-and-jeans look in class does not betray how truly magnificent her tits are. They're propped up by some kind of bra magic in defiance of gravity, and barely contained by the blue-green fabric of her shirt.  She laughs. "You're forgiven. Though by the transitive property, you definitely owe me a drink."

I also wrote another couple hundred words on my @carryon-reverse-bang beach fic, of which these are some:

The moon is rising and the tide is coming in. "D'you know," he says. "Even if there were no moon, we'd still have tides?" I hum. I look over at him. His silhouette is blurred by the rays of the setting sun, lighting him up from behind like an unearthly being.

Tagging @stitchyqueer @thewholelemon @confused-bi-queer @raenestee @facewithoutheart @cutestkilla @hushed-chorus @sillyunicorn @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @basiltonbutliketheherb @ileadacharmedlife @asocialpessimist @bookish-bogwitch @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @petedavidsonscock @yeonjunenby @carryonvisinata @takenabackbytuesdays @martsonmars @nausikaaa @nightimedreamersghost  @chen-chen-chen-again-chen  @ionlydrinkhotwater @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @shrekgogurt @forabeatofadrum   @palimpsessed @fatalfangirl @blackberrysummerblog @valeffelees @imagineacoolusername @orange-peony @j-nipper-95 @whogaveyoupermission @wellbelesbian @rimeswithpurple

[howdaretrashships]

AO3 Wrapped 2024 (writer's edition)

Tagged by @bbcphile and @la-muerta. Thanks for the tag! This is a little late, but I was waiting for the last minute anyway.

1. How many words have you written this year?

Of the published works: ~19.2k. Of the current WIPs: no idea, but probably somewhere around the same number.

2. How many works did you publish this year?

5, technically, although one of the works could be counted as four separate fics.

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

My Past has Tasted Bitter for Years Now

4. What work of yours has the most hits?

The 5+1 Yingzhu Armor fic has 840.

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

The Unhinged Tournament Propaganda. It was literally only written for the tournament, but it got feedback on both AO3 and here on tumblr.

6. Favorite title you used

pack up the moon - pour away the oceans

It's a reference to W.H. Auden's Funeral Blues and perfectly fits the fic and Feihua's vibes in general. I've loved the poem since high school and was very proud of myself for remembering it when it came time to name the fic.

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

I'm using I'll Be Good by Jaymes Young for most of the Prince/Bodyguard AU.

8. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

Feihua/Dihua was the only pairing I wrote for.

9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

Feihua/Dihua

10. What work was the quickest to write?

The Unhinged Tournament Propaganda was literally written over an hour or two.

11. What work took you the longest to write?

5+1 Yingzhu Armor fic. I worked on the newlywed room scene for weeks.

12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

So many. So so many.

13. What’s your longest work of the year?

The 5+1 Yingzhu Armor fic at 11663 words.

14. What’s your shortest work of the year?

Technically it's the Unhinged Tournament Propaganda. Total it's 1087 words (making it actually the second shortest) but each "chapter" is only a couple hundred words each.

15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

Mainly the Prince/Bodyguard AU. There's still a lot of work to be done, since only 2 of (initially planned) 16 parts have actually been finished.

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

Post-Canon, Not Beta Read, POV Di Feisheng are the top three.

17. Your favorite character to write this year?

Di Feisheng. I just love him so much.

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

Fang Duobing. Mostly when it's his POV, because there's how I'd like him to act/react, and there's how the character would actually act/react. And often those two things are in direct opposition.

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

Zhan Yunfei/Li Lianhua. I was going to write their part earlier this year but got distracted by other WIPs first.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

Which Moment, which was actually written and posted last year, but most of the works this year have been short and angsty, and it was the fic that helped me regain confidence to keep writing. Because if I could write a 21k word fic out of nowhere, then maybe I could write those other ideas I had.

21. How many kudos in total did you get this year?

295

22. Which work has the most comments?

The 5+1 Yingzhu Armor fic has 16.

23. Did you do any collaborative works this year?

I started one, but it's still in the very beginning stages.

24. Did you write any gifts this year?

No

25. Did you receive any gifts this year?

No

26. What’s your most common category?

M/M

27. What do you listen to while writing?

Just my everyday playlist. If I want something different then I'll turn on YT Music.

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

My Past has Tasted Bitter for Years Now

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

There's a few but I'll go with this one from the 5+1 Yingzhu Armor fic.

Hulijing snuffles at the silk looking for her promised snacks, and whines when she doesn’t find them. He reaches out to pat her head as a reassurance, then narrows his eyes at her. “Did you know about this?” he asks, pointing at the pup with an accusatory finger. “Did you know he had this?” Hulijing tilts her head first to one side then the other and licks at the end of his finger. Di Feisheng huffs a laugh and then sighs, “No, I suppose not."

I just like the little bit of playfulness from Di Feisheng, since it's not something we get to see much from him (if at all) in canon,

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

That I was actually able to stay engaged and excited for most of the year. Usually I'll write a couple things, get distracted by other things, and then disappear for a couple years. But I didn't just give up and I'm hoping I can continue that in the new year.

It was also a great help to have @bbcphile as an amazing cheerleader!!

If you'd like to do it, consider yourself tagged!

[s4pphic-sh3nan1gans]

Welp I just re-read Zame, si čisti dopamin because of your WIP post even though it ends on a cliffhanger and I shouldn't do that to myself😭😭😭 please tell me Bojan ends up kissing him

awwww thank you so much for re-reading!!! I know cliffhangers kinda make me wanna tear my hair out, so I'm immensely sorry for leaving it on one for so long aksjsksh 😭

so, I had a dive deep into my notes app and I realised that I actually wrote a decent amount of the final chapter?! like... over 1000 words?!?! which I was NOT expecting at all. it just makes me wonder why I lost motivation, usually if I have a big chunk of something done it just makes me want to finish it even more but gosh, idk 😭 sooooo perhaps I should finally finish it after all these months? 👀 it seems like a tragedy to leave it as is.

anyways, for your commendable bravery of reading an unfinished fic, I now gift to youuuuu (drumroll pleeeeease) the start of the final chapter, so far unseen... until now! enjoy 😌

Chapter 5 - Have I ever told you?

The next couple of days raced by for Bojan. Of course, he spent most of his time simply with Jere enjoying his company, but also getting to know his friends and being taken sightseeing around Finland.

If he was being perfectly honest with himself, a solid (and embarrassing) 70% of the time was spent over-thinking every single interaction and wondering if his sentiments were returned, and how he would even begin to bring it up.

(And if the other 30% was spent stealing glances and touches whenever he could... well. That was no one else's business but his.)

The day of the Tavastia concert was finally upon them, and Bojan had never felt so much anticipation in all his life. He simply could not wait for the atmosphere that he knew would feel like liquid electricity injected straight into his veins, heightened even more when he would step out onto stage with Jere, to a crowd not expecting him.

And yet... something was nagging at the back of Bojan's mind. Because as much as he was looking forward to sharing a stage with Jere - with Käärijä - it was also tainted by the fact he knew that he wore his heart on his sleeve and was as easy to read as a book. Maybe not by Jere himself, (because that man had proved himself to be clueless even at the best of times) but by the hundreds of people watching, and the countless thousands more inevitably watching videos online afterwards.

He knew that the fans were perceptive, and he knew that he didn't trust himself enough to keep his reactions and his goddamn smiles under control whenever he's around Jere, and as much as he might try, he knew there would be absolutely nothing he could do about it. To his eternal annoyance, he was in way too deep.

However, despite his worrying, a part of him really didn't care. It was highly likely that any embarrassing, lovesick moments on his part would be seen as a performance, simply fan-service and nothing more... but that simultaneously filled another part of him with dread and nausea, as he feared that is how Jere himself would view their antics. Playing it up for the crowd. Evoking reactions. Getting people talking.

"Bojan?"

He jumped. Jere was looking straight at him and... oh. He was shirtless. Clearly, Bojan had been too inside his own head to even notice him losing an item of clothing. Great, and now he was staring.

ask me about one of my wips!

[nereidprinc3ss]

ok finished. i missed dybmn so bad like literally best thing i could have opened this app to yayyyy!! i wasn’t even supposed to read it today like ive been rereading the rest of the chapters but its not something i can ever do at once like i always have to take my time with them and so i was gonna build up to this but i got really super impatient and ended up caving before 7 am yayyy lets give it up for responsible adults that can totally set boundaries for themselves

they are so cute. they are SO CUTE they will always have a special place in my heart but i love them so much i love their dynamic so much they are so back like they never left and we are all the happier for it. reading this was such a good experience because there were probably like 3 points where the chapter could have cut off like thought it was going to end but then it kept going and idk how much that sounds like a compliment now that ive typed it out but i promise you it really truly is 😭😭😭 jt was like but wait there’s MORE and that’s not to say the chapter felt really long cause i do read fics very slowly LOL idk what it is but i like to savor them so it usually takes me. While even just to read a couple hundred words on here but anyway the point is that i was really happy like you totally delivered even though there was never any doubt

unfortunately no university level peer review for today i’m just very excited and happy their interactions had me kicking my feet i’m serious i honestly just missed them so bad. spencer is so delicious like the way u write him is so YUMMYYY plz call me good girl and sweet thing and make me so flustered that i can’t sort through my thoughts omfg needdddd. also r is so funny the navy seal comment made me giggle and also the sheer twilightness of almost crying cause she wants that cookie soooo effing bad is hilarious me and u both sister girl. sometimes x reader is so fun when u consume it as another characters story that ur just watching over and can relate to

one thing i will say though is u do such a good job of setting a scene like it’s one of those things people deserve more credit for cause u don’t usually notice it unless it’s done wrong LOL but i don’t really visualize in my head while i’m reading but little things like how u wrote spencer pushed off the counter or like they walked to the back of the store in x aisle idk my brain kind of like Knows what ur talking about. ur like well yeah obviously cause i wrote it LOL idk how to explain it really but u do a really good job of setting a background even though it’s an underrated skill did any of that make sense i hope so sorry anyway

we are sooo back also the progression of the story is excellent i hope you feel better about it an also knowing that it doesn’t have to be a grand epic sometimes things can just be FUN and still be incredible and u cracked that code sam seriously not to sound all high and mighty and omniscient but i hope you can just enjoy it without feeling all this pressure even though that’s so much easier said than done. anyway now that i’ve written an entire dissertation in your inbox it’s time to clock out love u all hail nereidprinc3ss 🧸

Yayyyy ily ily yes I am feeling much better abt it now!!! I honestly do agree like I very rarely read the reader as myself yk like she’s usually some kinda faceless entity and I love her as a character who is not even me but also it’s extra fun cause she completely also is me like I get to make her talk how I talk and do what I’d do and I love it and I love that other ppl love it and thank u for being so sweet and kind as always lover!!!

[jazzypizzaz]

Fanfic writer interview meme

thanks @obstinatecondolement for tagging me!

How many works do you have on AO3? 79

What's your total AO3 word count? 337,715

Your Top 5 stories by kudos

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This DS9, Quodo cuddling, Odo is a blanket. Of all my fics this is the one I’m most perplexed by its kudo count. Are people that hungry for hurt/comfort pre-slash? Was it on a rec list of a popular blogger I’m unaware of? I don’t know, like it’s very nice it's good fic, but not one I think about often.

What Is This Feeling, So Sudden and New? DS9, Quodo, Odo adjusts to being solid, drinks all sorts of drinks, and has a sexual awakening. Now this is the fic I’m most proud of. That makes sense. Sexual tension! Plot! Emotional beats paced just right! (imo)

like to the lark at break of day arising OFMD, Stede/Ed’s first time, silly but emotional sex. This one I posted just at the right time in the fandom, and I had a lot of fun with it. Dumb banter, Stede gets carried away, Ed nuts and cries, I’m hitting all my favorite tropes lol.

Made Me Feel (Shiny and New) DS9, the sweetest hard Quodo, slow banging D/s double bluff. I never question a smut fic doing well. I assume you’re in it for the same reason I wrote it lmao.

Down On My Knees (I Wanna Take You There) DS9, Quodo, blowjob and tentacle sex. Ditto. :-P

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 

I always try to!!! The exception being if I’m not paying attention to fandom at all at the time, I go through phases like anything.

As a reader, I love to comment for the author interaction -- especially because sometimes you mention something you liked and it unlocks a whole interesting train of thought from the author about the behind the scenes insights, like a bonus meta. I’m obsessed by this pairing, you are too, please tell me everything hell yeah.

Do you write crossovers? 

I’ve written one Glee/TNG and one Glee/Harry Potter. Not generally though.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? 

Yes. Oh idk whatever I think is hot that the character also might be into. It has to be goofy, somewhat ridiculous, and definitely too many feelings are involved... 

Have you ever had a fic stolen? 

Not that I know.

Have you ever had a fic translated? 

I think someone asked me for permission once or twice, but I don’t remember if I saw the final result.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? 

No, gosh that’d really have to be the right person because it sounds maddening as a process. The potential to be more fun?? But potentially more frustrating.

What's your all time favorite ship? 

Oh you know. Somehow I started writing for rubber head aliens and never looked back.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but probably never will? 

I’m bad at starting things (there are tons of fic prompts I squirrel away for a rainy day), but compulsive about finishing them. If I have more than a couple hundred words written, by jove I’ll figure out a way to get to something I can call a final product that I share, even if it's several years later. 

Even when I’ve posted WIPs, almost the entire fic was written, I just needed to iron out details in the second part and only published the first part to stop myself from messing with it. Actually, exception that proves the rule (?) Coin-Operated Boy is my first true WIP, where I have a long list of ideas brainstormed, but I’m writing a bit by the seat of my pants rather than having all the plot points mapped out already. We’ll see how that goes, always fun to try something new!!

I’m also still committed to finishing the fic I started where Quark and Odo meet in prison and escape together based on this one comic about Rocket/Groot I read. I have like 7k written but there’s a looooot of rough sketchy bits and both details and broad strokes I have to figure out first.

What are your writing strengths? 

Managing tone? Something I enjoy doing anyway -- zipping along on a wild ride from goofy to angsty to heartfelt to absurd and back again. I’ve also been told I’m good at weird banter lol.

What are your writing weaknesses? 

Awkward run on sentences where I’m trying to pack too much in at once. PLOT ??? WHAT IS PLOT why can’t the characters just have a lot of feelings for no reason idk idk. being heavy handed with metaphors and ~themes~

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet, but want to? 

I want to write for Phlox sometime. I’m sure there’s a Quark rare pair I haven’t touched yet that’ll get obsessed with enough for a oneshot lol.

What's your favorite fic that you've written?

“What Is This Feeling?” has my whole heart. 

"Dinner for One" also has a special place - getting out my Sisko family feels, plus I pulled off making Siskuark happen (briefly) lol.

--

@wowbright @chacusha @quodo-brainrot tagging you if you want to participate I'd love to read your respones!

[sineala]

So Iron Man #172 was the July 1983 issue, so have a belated chance to commemorate anyway you want!

(Review, Drabble, Cake, General Thoughts, (Self) Rec Fics inspired by this issue etc)

I love this issue so much. Also this cover. At first I wasn't entirely sure if I had read any fic inspired by this issue specifically (rather than fics that just mention it in passing) and then I remembered that I had in fact written a very long story with a key scene that absolutely hinged on this issue. *facepalm*

I have not, however, posted this story. It's the 150,000-word Madame Masque story that I wrote for @phoenixmetaphor's awesome art for the Cap-IM RBB back in 2019 and, for a variety of reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, I ended up not posting it and writing an entirely different story that was just long enough to hit the word count minimum for the RBB. At some point I need to just take some time and rip out and redo a couple of big scenes closer to the end of the story, but I really hate editing and still haven't figured out how to fix the scenes and that's why I still haven't posted it.

Anyway, it has a pivotal scene (not one of the ones I am planning on changing) that heavily involves that issue. Phoenix even drew some lovely art for this particular scene and posted it a couple years ago, and, yeah, I still haven't posted the story.

I was going to post a longer excerpt of the scene in question but I couldn't figure out how to give the necessary context for the scene without spoiling about half of the story. So, uh, maybe someday I will manage to edit and post the entire thing. I just need to sit down and edit it. I have not yet managed to do that.

But you can have a couple hundred non-spoilery words of the very beginning of the story, because the actual first paragraph of the story is Tony having a nightmare about being back in the flophouse from IM #172. Uh, TW for alcoholism?

Tony woke, terrified, gasping for breath, the illusory taste of whiskey still lingering on his tongue. He clawed at his neck as phantom smoke stung his lungs, as his throat burned from the liquor, as tears leaked down his cheeks, while the flames roared around him, as he huddled alone and waited to die -- and then his eyes snapped open into quiet, serene darkness.

It had felt so real.

You're okay, he told himself, the beginning of the litany he'd made to ward away his nightmares. You're okay. It was a dream. It was terrible, but you're not there anymore. It's over. You haven't had a drink in years. You didn't really take that drink. You didn't ruin your life again. It was all a dream. You're safe. You're going to be okay.

The craving was still there, of course. It wasn't going to go away just because he wasn't drinking. Even if he never took another drink in his life, he was never going to be able to forget every last detail: the heft of a rocks glass in his hand, the way the light filtered through amber liquid, the smoothness of a fine scotch as he swallowed. His mouth was watering. He tried not to think about it, tried not to remember, tried not to build an image of something he couldn't ever have again.

The thirst was a siren's song, and it always had been: just one drink and nothing will hurt. Just one drink and nothing will ever hurt you again. Just one drink and you'll be happy.

It was a lie, and he knew that too. It was a lie, and for him it was never going to be just one drink, and that was why he couldn't have it.

But he wanted it. He always wanted it.

He pushed himself up to his elbows, and the sheet pooled down around his waist, exposing his bare skin to the air. The lights were off, but there was enough light through the curtains from the streetlights outside to orient himself.

You're in Avengers Mansion, he continued. You're not in that goddamn flophouse anymore. You're not shivering on the streets. You're in your own home and you're in your own bed and you're with someone who loves you.

That was when Steve, a light sleeper as always, rolled to his side and opened his eyes, pale blue gone nearly colorless in the dimness. His brow furrowed. "Tony?" His voice was thick with sleep. "Sweetheart? Everything okay?"

[grimeysociety]

20 questions for fic writers

technically my sideblog @youthereader was tagged by @indulgence-be-thy-name - thanks bb ❤️; and like Em I'll be answering for both accounts

How many works do you have on ao3? youthereader - 4 grimeysociety - 171

What's your total ao3 wordcount? youthereader - 17,245 grimeysociety - 2,299,669

What fandoms do you write for? MCU - almost exclusively Darcyland, a teeny bit of Stranger Things and RPF (Cillian Murphy characters mostly...I've barely begun though)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? I can only answer this from grimey so... The Comeback Kid Among Wolves Damn, I'm In It I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm Heart to Break

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not? I always reply to comments unless they're the rare dickish one (I delete those, that's always fun). I reply to everything to thank people for interacting in the first place. I like it when I get a reply from authors, too. I'm very grateful.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I think it was one with Shieldshock and hacking, post-Infinity War, so everyone was dusted except for Steve and Darcy. It was kind of Schrödinger's ending because it might have been happy? I left it open (and I won't ever tell the 'real' ending).

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Most of mine do. I can't help it. Especially since the 'happy ending' tends to be because of sex. I mean...

Do you get hate on fics? A couple times but it was really insignificant and swiftly deleted.

Do you write smut? If so, what kinds? I write it all. Kinktober was kind of my 'thing' for a few years, as in, some followers looked forward to it each October. I rarely don't have some form of smut in a fic. The filth is fun, and so is the intimate erotica type of stuff. The fluff is great, but I have actually written one that had no response whatsoever and I think it went a little too far for my regular readers.

Do you write crossovers? I think some of my Darcy fic count so I'm going to say yes. I've written her with most Chris Evans characters, like Ransom Drysdale to name one. It counts, right?

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes and it's still up lol

Have you ever had a fic translated? I've had a couple translated into Russian but can't recall which, it's been a few years.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I had someone ask me to ghostwrite their fic ending and then when they weren't happy with what I'd written they said 'no thanks' and haven't spoken to me since, does that count?

What’s your all time favorite ship? I will never be able to decide this, sorry. It's been years and I can never pinpoint it. Literally hundreds of thousands of words written over the three particular ships I'm thinking of and there's no way. There's just no way.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? The Americans. It's been nearly 2 years since I updated and I think it's been forgotten about anyway, so that's me off the hook.

What are your writing strengths? I can't answer that. I have no idea.

What are your writing weaknesses? My pacing is the worst. I repeat myself. I don't think I'm consistent in any way. I get impatient and hardly edit sometimes, which bites me in the ass later. I am bad at a lot of things.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I've done it and it's fine. It's my average high school level French, but it's passable. Literally I passed high school French.

First fandom you wrote for? Kingdom Hearts

Favorite fic you’ve written? The Comeback Kid because it seems to be everyone else's favourite, too.

I will tag @sarahbeniel & @aimmyarrowshigh

[ace-does-stuff]

Surge

Summary: Lare is dead, as expected she freaks out a bit- it's her first time! Who can blame her? She'd like to consider herself lucky that someone else is there, if that someone else was helpful.

Warnings: Implied character death, check Ao3 port for full tags

Authors Note: @bree-sae wrote a fic, and I went, 'crossover time' and proceeded to explode. @sobredunia it's a Kenikari fanwork, I am obligated to tag you in every single piece of Kenikari I write ever.

Why is it so bright? And warm? And never fucking ending, everywhere her eyes land all she can see is white.

Panic settles into her form and she's frozen where she stands, unable to move her legs. Wait, standing. She can, she can probably sit down if there's something that she's standing on. But she should be looking for an exit before anything else, try to scrape up some idea of how she got here.

So Lare walks. Presuming she's heading north instead of south. Or east instead of west. But she walks, she walks through the blank void laid out below and above and all around her.

She walks into someone and they both fall, she's quick to start apologizing. It's returned with a couple shockingly low it's fine's as she takes a moment to look at what she bumped into.

A humanoid, dirty blonde, orange outfit- snow gear in every essence of the word. He's got a knife stuck in the side of his throat but he doesn't seem to notice it. He blearily blinks himself back to awareness and he has indigo eyes.

"You're new here," Was what he said before anything else and that only left Lare with more questions than before.

"Where even is here?" Lare asked, trying her hardest to not ask a hundred other questions.

"This? This is death, you are dead, and so I am," He said and Lare could feel herself panicking, It must've shown because he was quick to try and rebuttal, "Don't worry! You aren't dead dead, you're just yet to return."

"You have a knife sticking out of your neck," Lare said, he feels around for it blindly. He gives a hum before tugging it out, there's almost no blood.

"Almost forgot about that, you get used to it after a while," He said as he drew his knees to his chest, "What's your name?"

"What's yours?" Lare spits back defensively.

"Kenny- Kenny McCormick, from South Park Colorado!" He wears a grin as he speaks despite the fact he's dead.

"I'm Lare," Lare said stiffly as she held out a hand to shake, Kenny gladly took in a shake.

"Look, I doubt you wanna talk about it but how did it happen?" Kenny asked.

Lare stiffens up, "Why would I tell you?"

"Helps the process go faster," Kenny answered with, "I mean, if you like purgatory I'm not judging."

"I'm pretty sure I froze to death," Was Lares response.

Kenny gives a hum, "Skill issue, anyways, my good friend stabbed me over something stupid- probably pissed I'd rather fuck Kyle than him, might've been monopoly."

Lare has so many questions at the statement.

"I don't know when you'll die next, but if your life is as cruel as mine I doubt we won't see each other again," Kenny said as he tightened his grip on Lare's hand, already fading.

She glanced down to her hand, "Oh fuck what's happening now?!"

"Relax man, you're just reincarnating," Kenny said calmly as Lare started to fade.

"What?!" She sounded distraught at the notions, Kenny placed a hand on her shoulder.

"You aren't gonna wake up a tadpole or some shit, you'll just end up back at home, or somewhere near your death- I don't know how your shtick works," Kenny said in an attempt to console her.

And then Lare passed out.

-/-/-/-

The time between her first death and the next death blur together in a horrible mix of everything and nothing at all. She can still hear him, that stupid voice singed into the back of her head and it's driving her mad. It was some dumb dream her brain produced while she was passed out in the cold room, nothing more.

Which leaves her with the question of how it felt so real.

The ice grasping at her skin. Chills seeping deeper into her lungs. Hands shaking her. Voices begging her to stay awake. It all felt so real, but when she asked questions, ever so subtle, worded carefully at that, they all looked at her like she was insane. Murasaki, Chuyo, Bee, even Mako and Detah- and maybe for a second she believed them that she was insane.

It had to be a dream, it could be nothing else. She pushed it all down and acted like it never happened because who would believe her if it had? No one, no one would believe her even if she wanted to act like they would.

She really hopes that releasing the cart when she trips is the right choice, that Bee and Mako make it out while she doesn't. She can feel the pain start at her feet and then crush the rest of her in an instant, she's sure she's been flattened into a paste rather than a pancake. She can hear Uzomi's scream of her name even after she's been thoroughly killed, the few seconds she gets before being thrust back into the void.

She finds that idiot in orange sipping on a juicebox with a slice down his throat that's still oozing. She walks over and takes a seat down beside him, he perks up a bit and has the audacity to smile.

"You're back!" Kenny sounds happy when he speaks, placing his juice box down beside his thigh as he speaks.

"I actually died," Lare got out quietly, disbelief heavy on her voice. She draws her knees to her chest, "And it's happened before."

"Yeah, the first couple times are always rough," Kenny said, voice softening a bit. He slings an arm around her shoulders, "I had an Italian who only communicates in wahoo! and yippee! with a heavy dose of body language for my first deaths."

"You had Jumpman Mario around when you died?" Lare asked, she sounded a bit hysterical.

"The one and only, he was hard to deal with, but I doubt he enjoyed consoling an idiot third grader who got turned to a platypus and mutilated," Kenny said as though it was common. Lare rested even more of her weight on him.

"Kenny when is it gonna stop?" She choked out quietly.

And Kenny didn't know how to tell her the truth.

"Well, I've been coming back here since the third grade and I'm what, fifteen? Yeah, about fifteen, so, a while," He got out sheepishly, "But hey! You aren't dying a lot which is nice, I used to die every single day."

"Really?" Lare asked, wrapping her arms around her legs as she spoke.

"Really, and then I got some weird ass disease that destroyed my muscle cells. I really thought that I was gonna stay dead when that happened, just me and Kyle, and then I was gone. I was here, but I wasn't there, and then I stayed here for weeks straight," Kenny said, he heaved a sigh, "But I'm back to my usual death schedule with slight alterations, so far you've only died twice which is rather impressive."

Lare was crying now.

"It'll be fine," Kenny said, "Promise," He rubbed Lares arm a bit.

Lare didn't answer.

"Ready to say how it happened?" Kenny asked.

"I was crushed to death by a rolling stone," Lare choked out on a strangled sob, "It was fast, but really shitty- children watched it happen Kenny! There were two kids who I hope lived even though I died."

"I'm sure that they did," Kenny said, he tightened his grip on her a bit, she wasn't fading yet.

"How about you? Who slit your throat over a game of monopoly?" Lare asked, almost jokingly. She had a gut feeling it would be much worse than that.

Kenny quirks a brow before realizing what she means, "Oh, that, that's nothing- most of the damage is internal. I don't know what they slid in through the hole," He brought his fingers to pull it open further and Lare gagged, "But it was something sharp and probably poison coated."

"Nasty," Lare said, sticking out her tongue a bit as she spoke.

"Super, but I've had worse deaths," Kenny said, he grinned a bit as he thought back on them, "Wanna hear?"

"Why not, pass the time or whatever," Lare said dismissively before her partner in death started to ramble.

[birdybirdnerd]

WIP Wednesday Game

It’s WIP Wednesday, time for a little accountability, sharing your work, and getting a kick in the pants. Thanks to @kedreeva for the prompt! Also @laureniscoolcool if you don't to it this week I'm kicking your ass

Here’s how it works:

In a reblog (or new post w/ rules attached), post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can't share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post. If you tag me in your post, I will send you an ask request!

If you’re reading this, you’re invited!

If you see someone posting a WIP Wednesday Game snippet, send them an ask! Make them write.

My WIPs:

SE CH19

tsp zombie au

pendragon alderpat thing

fofe shock

Snippet from SE CH19 under the cut!

A section of the ceiling unfolded and lowered, bringing down with it a sturdy looking wooden ladder that thunked to the ground at their feet. It led up into a room up above that was shrouded in darkness and dust. 

“It has been long enough,” Ana explained as she waved at the dust that fell in their eyes, “that I think it is time you moved out of Natalia and Isabel’s room, and into your own. And it is way past time we cleaned out this old attic and went through the generations of basura we have collected up here.” 

The Narrator felt like he was catching up, but still a touch unsure. “And so you’re… conscripting me to help you?” 

“Of course!” Ana’s eyes glinted. “What, you expect me to climb up there and haul down a hundred boxes all on my own? Ha! I would break more than a hip, narrador.” 

At her instruction, he helped Ana climb up the wooden ladder into the hole in the ceiling. She pulled on another string at the top, and a couple dusty old bulbs flickered to life, illuminating a small and cozy room stacked floor to ceiling with boxes. 

[gretchensinister]

authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤

In no particular order:

Incarnation: The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance, SkekGra/UrGoh, E, 152,469 words. Not just on this list because it’s the newest! I’m really proud of what I was able to accomplish, meeting the challenges posed by alien bodies and the question of how to make characters that are pulled together for supernatural reasons choose each other and fall in love in excess of fate. I loved writing this slow burn, mutual pining journey. It’s about those moments when you realize you want to live more than you want to be good, and that you want to love more than you want to be good—and then realizing that there never had to be a choice between them.

A Draught of Light: Rise of the Guardians, Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie, M, 200,099 words. Epic Fantasy AU. Don’t worry, I’m staring gobsmacked at that word count, too. I started writing this shortly before completing my master’s degree, and continued it through quitting grad school and therefore drastically changing my goals for my life, a short and panicky time of unemployment, and a year at a rather shitty office job. I think about it a lot, and not only because I have fanart a friend made for me of it hanging on my wall. It’s about truth and knowledge (who creates it, who has access to it), loving someone one has explicitly been told not to love, what kind of power and what kind of reasons might lead someone to stay with an institution that hurt someone they loved, how it feels to leave an institution that has been your whole life, even after it has hurt you, what is valuable beyond the institution, when that institution has vanished, what it feels like to conclude that the only solution to right a fundamental wrong is your own death, what it feels like to be told that to undo a fundamental wrong you must be the one to cause the death of one you love, and still making it turn out all right in the end. I used Choose Not to Warn because I wasn’t sure where the line for graphic violence fell.

The Doors of Perception: Rise of the Guardians, Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie, M, 43,892 words. Human AU, 1960s to early 2000s. I also wrote this during the semester before I got my master’s degree. I was IN IT in the spring of 2013. It starts with all the Rise of the Guardians characters as hippie/counterculture types in San Francisco in 1967. The Summer of Love is the beginning of something wonderful between Sandy and Kozzy until an ill-fated return home leads to Kozzy’s unaccepting family separating him from Sandy for far too long. It does work out in the end, though. Also the era is one I have a passing research interest in, so I’m not just using pop culture osmosis to write the 60s. I’m not claiming perfection, just that I don’t, for example, make LSD do things it definitely doesn’t do. This was the fic where I learned how to look up historical weather data.

A Perfect Man is Hard to Find: Rise of the Guardians, Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie, E, 20,266 words. Human AU, 2010s, serial killers. *Evil grin* This one’s pretty sick, babes. I posted this during a trip where someone had flown hundreds of miles to meet me in person for the first time, which seems weird now. I mean, it was done, so what else did I have to do while waiting for her to shower/put on makeup etc.? I guess? Anyway, I think the summary explains it best: Pitch Black, the cannibalistic Boogeyman serial killer, and his partner, Sandy, a serial killer ex-psychologist who Pitch helped escape from police custody, now live a quiet life together in the suburbs. One morning, Pitch encounters a beautiful young man on his morning run, and knows at once he must hunt him, devour him. Sandy is all too glad to help him, and they make a very, very lovely day and night of it. (AKA, murder as an erotic couple bonding activity.)

The Dream Forest: Rise of the Guardians, Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie, T, 2,838 words. This one I originally posted just to tumblr and then took seven years to move it to Ao3. As you do! Written after getting my master’s degree during a semester of grad school I honestly DO NOT remember. Except for writing this story during a professionalization class that absolutely sucked. An experimental second-person story where the main character makes their way through a dreamlike forest, wondrous and ominous at the same time, catching only fleeting glimpses of the entities that created/inhabit such a space.

[awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands]

🦋🧃🎲 <3

Writers Truth & Dare Ask Game

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately

Personlly it has been I've felt not confident enough in my writing for a while now. The lack of notes and interactions got me and I found asking myself " What if I'm just not good?" " What if writing is not for me?" but eventually the urge to write gets the best of me and I end up doing it anyway even if I'm posting less. I also wanna get more involved in screenwriting since I'll never know if I'm good enough without trying.

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

Me lore? Goodie, I think I overshare quite much, I have a boring life hahaha. I wish I had juicy secrets but I can only say that I wrote fanfic about real people in my highschool but ofc I've never posted it, just shared with my close friends through text. Said ff never left my computer and I deleted it long ago, however it was a nice experiment and I entertained my besties for a month or so.

🎲 ⇢ what stops you from writing more in your free time? 

Honestly, I'm just an idiot because I tend to procrastinate. I usually try to fight this by making sure to create an habit and write a couple of hundreds of words every day. I manage to do the with the stripper Vince but there are fic I wanna finish that I need to get to. I wanna say the lack of interest, my perfectionism, the fear of rejection are all factors but sometimes I just end up playing silly games instead of writing T.T

[kenobster]

honestly I wouldn’t put too much stock in follower counts and activity pages. obviously we have no idea how many followers users have but I’d wager it’s around 50 for most people, and depending on how long you’ve been on here, a good chunk of them might be inactive or lurkers.

furthermore, this used to be the reblogging things site, which has since been plagued with likes only. it’s like that for a lot of posts, big blog or otherwise. but the problem with that is, if no one reblogs things, there’s less opportunity for more notes in the first place.

the moral of this story is, do whatever you want and don’t worry about adding your voice on anything! the numbers do not matter at all

Thanks so much anon, that's very kind of you to say!!! I love every single one of my followers, even the inactive ones and even the scandalously dressed ladybots that I haven't reported & blocked yet. XD Like, I seem to be miscommunicating lately, and it feels like maybe I'm coming across as upset/stressed out/angry without meaning to? So I'm gonna take this chance to needlessly describe my activities for the last 24 to 48 hours to prove a point lmfao.

Yesterday morning, I was reintroducing my grumpy timid cat to a super friendly cat I will be cat-sitting for the next month or so, which was super fun and one of my special interests. After that, I was chillin with my fandom homies while we played Jackbox and heard each other's voices for the first time ever (voices that were audibly referencing Vader's Uterus lmfao so I was pretty ecstatic). After that, I played around with my INCREDIBLE Vader bop-it toy that I bought yesterday based on a friend's recommendation. My first Hasbro merch ever. :) I'm in love and I still can't believe it's a real thing that exists.

At that point, I checked Tumblr and... yeah, admittedly I panicked a little because I was a bit scared I'd soon get a bunch of angry asks screaming at me for being a meanyhead (to beat a horse dead, this is just a regular run-of-the-mill anxiety of having a fandom blog and it is absolutely nobody's fault). So I spent an hour or so chatting with a friend until I felt better and then I quickly made the post in question regarding my follower count so that, despite the bewildering attention Five Peggats Each has gotten, everyone would know the truth about my lack of influence lmao. (This is a compliment. From me to me. I like my lack of influence. I'm not fucking kidding lol. I actually have panic attacks sometimes about the idea of becoming internet famous. I literally don't want that lmao. Fifty to a hundred followers is an A+ amount imo, so it's about time I guess it's about time I start losing those pornbots lmfaoo.) Anyway, last night was probably the first time I've checked my follower count in the entire history of this blog tbh. So like, you're being super sweet, anon, and I'm hoping other people will see this too because it's absolutely true and I think your words would be very encouraging and reassuring to anyone who sees this!! But I promise you that my activity log statistics and teh amount of followers I have are not things I spend time thinking about.

Once that was all taken care of, I wrote/edited a little bit for my fic for QuinObi week (SO EXCITED! Literally just a few more days!). Then at around 4am, I woke up with middle-of-the-night epiphanies on how to phrase a couple things/finish/tidy up my thoughts for that Fox opinions post, and I lay in bed working on that for an hour or so. After that, I went back to sleep, woke up, chatted with the fandom homies again, and then, ever since, I've been playing a video game I've been dying to play all week. Until about an hour ago, I literally had no idea what may or may not have been going down on Tumblr, and I wasn't thinking about it at all. And now that I've enjoyed myself on Tumblr for the day, I'm probably gonna invite my mom up tonight so she can spend time with the cats while I use her as a captive audience to talk about Vader's Uterus lmfao. And then at about 10pm, I'm gonna head bed because I work for a living and I forgot to ask if I get the holiday off.

All of this to say I am fine!! I'm just chilling, living my life, doing my own thing. For me, Tumblr is like a fun thing to check out every once in a while, the same way I spent time playing my video game, enjoying my Vader bop-it toy, hoarsing around with the cats, or anything else that strikes my fancy. Kidney stones and abusive ex-bosses are the things I worry about, not like.... a pixelated number on a screen lmao. In other words, this is a hobby to me, not a livelihood, and if I wasn't enjoying my time here, I literally would not log on (and sometimes I don't log on! For days and days at a time. Because I'm enjoying other things more!)

But anyway, I will say that the thing that makes it the most fun for me here? People like you!! Who send me asks. Who share their thoughts on my posts. Who became friends that give me the confidence to make the posts that I wanna make. Who have other fun lil interactions with me. So (1) Please don't worry about me. I'm fully medicated, my back is sore, and I'm too old to be upset over fandom things lmao. And (2) I really cannot thank you and everyone who makes my fandom experience so enjoyable!!! :D Y'all are great and I'm thrilled to be able to have fun here. I'm living my best life.

[sammyluvr]

ahhh yes!! i actually didn't do much, i just wrote a couple hundred words to finish off the charlie fic! but it was nice to finish regardless!

yayayay!! i'm so very glad that it was good, that sounds lovely!! AGH SO JEALOUS OF THE KBBQ i need some good samgyeopsal ASAP !! (had kbbq last weekend but i felt like it could've been a lot better.. the samgyeopsal at the place in my city is a whole lot better than this restaurant and it was so much more expensive boooo lolol) anyways!! i love that for you sm!! i hope you rest well tonight!!

sighhh it was a long long day it felt like lol. luckily i think it ended up good overall, i love being at dance practice and i had some lovely chats on here + i studied/hung out with friends just a bit ago and that really cheered me up! i had a slightly unfortunate part of my day where i got really overwhelmed/overstimulated and it really drained me and put a damper on my mood for a bit, but like i said, hanging with friends really brought my mood back up again so i'm feeling good! just tired and ready to head to bed LOL

so i will talk to you more tomorrowww i love you so so very much <33

BABYYYY your fall theme is my everything i love it sm <333

ARGHH THANK YOU BABY!! IM GLAD YOU LOVE IT AS MUCH AS I DO HEHE <33