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asocialangel · 1 year ago

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Hello !! I saw that your requests were open so I wanted to know how you think the bllk would react if their s/o asked for a break or a break up with them ?? Actually i read your work on it and it was very well written (hurts my heart ಠ⁠‿⁠ಠ) so I was curious about that.

Anyway have a good day~~

“let’s break up” - how the bllk boys would react

Hello lovely ! Are you doing great ? Was my response quick enough ? Anyways, i wrote short fics instead of headcanons, i feel like they are more suited. But if you wish, I can write them in hc forms ! Specific characters can also be requested for a part two~ enjoy and don’t cry too much~~

Blue Lock angst: breaking up with Isagi Yoichi and Itoshi Rin

Isagi - swear words, toxic behaviors from both ends, no one is right\an example to follow tbh TT - 1,2k

It had been a while. That Isagi was ignoring you. Your hugs, your texts, the cooked meals you always put aside for him. You lifted your head and looked in front of you. It was so dark now it hurt your eyes. The afternoon had gone by in a blink of an eye. You had sat on the couch and next thing you know you’re on the floor, back against the living room rug, still crying. Everytime you dried up your tears, a few minutes of thinking were enough for them to start rolling down your cheeks again. Purposeful or not, did it even matter ? And you had rehashed thoughts and fake conversations so much by now, that you started convincing yourself he avoided you deliberately, to have fun and make you cry.

The dim sky barely lit up the room, it was hard for you to distinguish the furniture around you. Everything was a grayish blue. Inside and outside. You and your surroundings. When you heard keys in the lock, you took a deep breath, eyes closed. The door creaked open.

“Hey ba-” The voice that started talking with so much enthusiasm abruptly stopped. “Why’s it so dark ?” Without even warning, Isagi turned the switch on. Ow. It hurts your eyes so much. Yet you continue blankly staring at the coffee table. “Practice was so tough today. Hum, Y\N where are you ?”. You could feel him searching left and right for you. So used to it huh, you greeting him the second he arrives, a warm smile on your face, the table set behind you. There was a last time for everything, but none of you knew that yesterday was the one. “Oh well.” Quickly giving up, you heard his duffle bag hit the floor. He left everything as it was, heading for a shower.

“I’m here.” Your expression still being as empty, not even looking in his direction, you got up. Your hand helping you lift your weight, you finally revealed yourself to him. From your peripheral vision, you could see his smile getting wider as he saw you. Not that you cared. You didn’t even bother to look at him when you pronounced that dreadful sentence: “We need to talk”.

“Do we ?” Isagi’s smile instantly dropped. But it made you furious. Instead of an apprehensive, concerned expression, he seemed annoyed. That bitch is gonna complain again right ? That’s probably what he was thinking. Couldn't he at least fake being scared for your relationship ? “Well i must. I’ll tell you something. Although I'm surprised you have nothing to tell me. Nothing’s been bothering you ? Everything alright, a-ok ? La vie en rose ?” You still didn't look at him, though you were walking in his direction, your eyes were empty. “What, does something seem wrong to you ? To me nothing h-” Ugh ! He was so ! Infuriating ! Why was he acting all cool, all unbothered, disdainful ? “Something ?! Something ?! Everything !”

You finally looked at him. Right in the eyes. You hadn't realized that anger had taken over your sadness. “How can you dare to pretend things are going right ? Have some respect, for me, and yourself !” “Okay okay, what will you whine about today ?” Isagi answered right away. “My fangirls ? How you wanna meet my friends ? The fact you’re convinced my parents dislike you ? Everything we’ve been through again and again.” He had an arrogant tone, almost laughing at you. “You always have something to bring up. I’m getting tired of your childish complaints”.

Right where it hits the most. You scoffed. “Okay. Okay then. You’ll be so glad to hear what I've got to say”. You too started putting on a derisive expression. “At first I was sad. But now I'm thinking, how could you let yourself be treated this way, love ?” You were walking around the living room, in a theatrical way, gesturing to yourself and raising your eyebrows faking concern. “Isagi. You looked at him. I’m not gonna let you neglect me again, let alone pretend I'm the one who’s wrong. You and I… We’re over”. You looked at him almost satisfied. You-from-4-hours-ago would've never believed that, out of all the feelings you could have felt when asking to break up, amusement would have been the one.

And what you saw was even more delightful. Isagi’s expression turned from scoffy to utterly shocked. He did not see that coming. After all, to him, you had become someone who would just complain… Not actually take action. Little did he know everything he took for granted was going to disappear. As quickly as you would. Suddenly his whole world fell upon his feet.

You smiled, walking closer and closer to him. His sad expression.. It was almost fulfilling now. So taken aback, Isagi couldn't move, he only looked you in the eyes, full of despair. His eyebrows were wavering, his eyes were starting to get glossy from tears welling up, he tried to blink. You approached your face dangerously close to his. Your noses were almost touching, but you didn't budge though. You looked at him deep in the eyes, feeding on his pain. “Can you finally feel what I felt ?” Your tone was full of resolution. You stayed for a few seconds, just to pressure him, until you stepped back. You took each of his arms, and looked at his face again. “It’s okay. You’re a resilient boy, you’ll get through this”. You put on a fake pout, mocking compassion. “It’s not like I mattered much to you anyway, right ?”.

You violently let go of him, shaking his arms with strength, your smile fading away. “Now go”. You walked right past him, took your keys, your bag and left. It was his apartment, and you still had some stuff left. After all, it’s not like you had planned to break him up today, he just brought it upon himself. The way you moved made it look like you were unaffected. You swiftly opened the door and exited. You walked with resoluteness, steady walking, chin up through the hallways, up until the elevator.

On his side, it took Isagi a few seconds to register what had just happened. He was still standing there, blankly when you left, not even trying to get you back. So confused. Until it hit him. It hit him so hard. Tears started rolling down his cheeks uncontrollably as he fell to the ground. What had he done ? How did he allow himself to lose you ? The corny saying that you ‘only notice something when it’s gone’ finally had meaning. As he played in his head every little thing he was already missing from you, a crushing feeling of remorse dawned upon him. Finally, he realized everything he’d done wrong while going out with you, and to add to the burden he now bore, he finally saw that that’s what you had been complaining to him about. Everything you had said, you were right.

Knees to the ground and hands shakily wiping off his tears, Isagi thought he’d never see the end of it. He wanted you back. Maybe if he called you, apologized, no, maybe if he, ugh it was in vain. He just wanted to tell you he’s sorry. But was he ? Maybe the two of you were not meant to be. He looked at his hands and got up, wiped his tears. Actually… you were wrong. He did everything right. But you were an ungrateful lucky lover.

Obviously, it’d end up like this. You broke down crying in the elevator. How foolish were you, to think he’d be affected. Like it always happens, you were the one hurt, and he didn't question himself. If just once it could’ve been reversed.

Rin - 1k2 words

Even though the lights were bright and the crowd was loud, it's like you weren't there. Everyone around you was keenly embroiled, but you could barely distinguish the players on the field. You had come to watch your boyfriend play, just like you’d watched every other game of his from this season. But this time, you couldn't force yourself to get into it. Your vision was blurry, you know, when you can't focus your eyes on something ? You see it happen from afar, you’d like to catch every detail of it, but your eyes just won’t let you. It happens when you’re tired, or when you don’t put in enough effort. You could not concentrate, too busy thinking.

You were sitting in the vip spot, all alone, unfilled seats surrounding you, an empty, almost sad, look on your face. You knew what would come after the match. And as boring as the game felt to you today -even though it wasn’t- you didn't want it to end. Because it finishing meant you also had to finish something. Something you had to say to Rin. He scores, smiles faintly and glances at your direction.

But you weren’t looking at him anymore. When you watch him these days… You don’t feel anything anymore. If you could force yourself to do so, you would have already done it a while ago. Every candle you blow is accompanied by the same wish, to restore the feelings you once had for him. It would feel so much easier if you could continue on pretending. What’s wrong with you ? He’s the dream guy…

You stared into space, and suddenly your ears rang louder than before. You looked up to see that the match had ended. You take a deep breath, faintly smile as you know your boyfriend is looking at you, and get up. Time to face reality. As you make your way to the backstage to meet him, you start thinking. You still have that surreal, high on over-stimulation feel, but your thoughts start clearing up: this might be the worst time to do what you’re about to do. He had just won a match, almost single-handedly carrying his team, and his season was far from over. It would most likely break his spirit. But you just felt like being selfish… Once again. Feigning this much, you can't do it longer. There was nothing left anymore that made you want to stay, apart from the objectivity that Rin himself, is what anyone would wish for. Even that was obvious to you, but it wasn’t enough anymore. Nowadays looking at him is like looking at a dessert when you’re not hungry. You don’t even want it, it wouldn’t satisfy you.

You feel the coldness of the metal stair rail you’re trailing your fingers on. It brings you to where you ought to go. “Y\N”. His voice is just as cold. You used to dig that, though. “I did good, didn’t I?” “You sure did”, you answer, looking at the floor. “Look Rin, there’s something I wanna tell you. I’m sorry for being brutal. I want us to break up”.

The whole room paused. Oh yes, because at this point, I might as well do it in a room full of people. They were bound to find out anyway. Rin’s feeble smile totally faded. His mouth was even slightly opened from shock. “Le-let’s take this elsewhere”. Rin had put a serious face on and sharply grabbed your wrist, dragging you rather inconsiderately in the staircase. No one came here ever. The sound resonated so well, it was almost scary. If someone were to pass by, they would hear everything. “Why so sudden ?”

You were so ashamed. You frenziedly shook your hand off his grip, still looking at the floor. “I don't know. It’s been on my mind a while. It just took me some time to muster the courage”. Lies. “That’s odd. It’s selfish, but I wish you’d never told me”. Rin took his hand to your chin, raising your head up so you’d look him in the eyes. You tried to escape, and look left or right, but you felt emeralds piercing right through your eyes. You looked straight up. You were most definitely going to miss this perfect face. His cold hands and towering stature. “Tell me the truth now”. He commended and you obeyed, as always:

“I dont love you anymore”. You glossy lips rested pouty. It was almost criminal, saying this while staring at him dead in the eyes. He roughly let you go with a ‘tch’, making you lose your balance. “That’s it huh ?” His back was turned but you could feel the disappointment in his voice. Not sad, just let down by your lack of effort. He was right though, if you were to end it, you could’ve done it nicely. You didn't know what to do as he wasn't speaking anymore. “Are you okay with that ?” What stupid thing to say. You looked at him, waiting for an answer. “Okay. Let’s break up”. Rin finally turned to you. You felt your heart fall to your chest, so heavy. Why now ? You’d rehearsed this conversation over and over, you knew well you didn't have feelings for him anymore. So why is it hurting ? Why now ? Rin walked to what you thought was closer to you, but shifted before. He was going for the door. “Tomorrow, come pick up your stuff at my place. If you can’t, please text my maid, she’ll get it sent to your address”. You started feeling tears welling up and your throat itching. “Is that all ?” You got walking too, to reach Rin.

Pushing Rin’s chest with both your hands, you felt your eyes getting heavier and heavier. But he barely budged. Your voice cracked: “Come on, react ! I don't know, throw a fit, cry, disrespect me, act like you care ! Grab my shoulders and shake me, shove me to the wall !” You were totally breaking down. Tears were now rolling down your flushed cheeks, your hands were shaking, rested on his chest.

“Is that wrong for me, to love you so much I'll accept everything you do to me ?”. You looked up, surprised to hear him answer. “If you want to break up, I'll accept, because I'd do anything and everything for you. I love you like that ! I’m so hurt but I'm trying to keep it cool so you don’t regret your decision. If you came to realize how terrible you’re treating me right now, you would feel bad. Let me pretend I'm the bad guy so you walk away with a clean conscience.” His words sunk into you. “What, did you, on top of treating me like this, expect me to plead with you to stay, to change your mind ? I’m all yours, but I'm no beggar.”

Rin finally pushed you off him, looking down on you. “It’s over, goodbye”. The sound of his voice and the door shutting closed resonated in the staircase. It felt so alone. You stood there shaking from the cold and crying. It might be better like this.

A\N: ngl, these are borderline corny, ooc, and took me way too long to write TT. Next time i'll write HC maybe. Advices anyone ?! not rly proud of these.

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sorrowfulmuse · 1 year ago

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Hi! Could you write some hc’s for Syzoth/Reptile where the reader is just completely enamoured with him?

♡:: syzoth x gn!reader (short headcanons)

✩:: whoop whoop! how do we like the new user? it’s kinda boring so i’ll switch it around couple of times 😭 but anyways thank you for requesting syzoth! i don’t know much about him but i'm rewatching the play through TT, he’s such a sweetheart! also later this week i’ll be opening requests again and all my drafts for older requests will be posted with a time schedule and then requests will be closed again! pls read this before requesting!

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀🦎 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀

the feeling will be very much mutual

you wouldn’t admit it but you found yourself by his side each morning until the sun kissed the moon goodbye

watching from afar as he did his daily routine, kitana swore she saw your eyes became heart shaped

you got to know him a little more once mileena caught on and gave you both a task to do around the temple

and from that day on, you sent the empress many thanks

syzoth was pretty awkward when he finally spoke but eventually calmed himself when he saw and just felt how comfortable you around him (his heart swelled)

your heart sung when he would smile at you, the way it’ll twirl and dance when he would say your name like a lyric from a song.. oh man you were down bad

you’ll try to help him certain tasks from the empress or follow him to sun'do and window shop as you both share stories from your culture to your adventures

you couldn’t lie to yourself, syzoth was more charismatic than people give him credit for. he’s not awkward but rather just more on the quiet side.

you’re not sure if he does it on purpose but there is times where you’ll catch him staring at you for a good while and only smiles back when you make eye contact with him

it’s like an arrow to your heart, he’s definitely doing that on purpose

you didn’t know how attach you were to syzoth until it came as a surprise when your peers pointed it out each time, "you’re by his side the moment you wake!" they would joke

although they teased and teased you, the immediately guilt fell upon your shoulders. were you really being THAT oblivious with your feelings?

but not for long, syzoth himself would put an end to their endless teasing

he would admit that he didn’t mind at all that you were by his side and that he deeply enjoyed your company just as long as you enjoyed his as well

you could feel the tiny fireworks light off when he would grab your hand to reassure you

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arwainian · 11 months ago

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The F@tT Fic Marathon: Catching up finally.

🎉I have officially read the full Friends at the Table AO3 tag!🎉

My very silly quest has reached its technical end point after EXACTLY 10 months of intensive reading! It has been sometimes grueling, often delightful, and led to me developing intense opinions in directions i never thought possible to myself. But I have done it, and I am extremely pleased with myself.

To get some housekeeping out the way, I usually give recs upon a writeup, but since there were only three fics left for me to read i'm just gonna shout them out generally.

Fics 1981-1983

check out i'm too scared to say half of the things i do (when i picture you) by waltztangocache for partizan era Kal'mera Broun fantasizing about Valence and trying to keep from letting that slip through their telepathic bond

and if you like Christmas fic, fangirl_squee has got you covered with Fero "not liking Christmas" but being roped into it anyway, and the Bluff City Masks crew hunting down some Christmas mini-miracles

and like, if you're looking for something to read, remember every single writeup has come with at least one personal recommendation. it's all under the tag #fatt fic marathon (also a caveat that these recommendations come from my personal tastes, i might not have mentioned a fic during the marathon that's a favorite of yours and i hope you continue to deeply enjoy what you love even when it might not have hit where I would have liked)

if you would like to take a look at the massive spreadsheet I used to keep track of which fics I was set to read together, as well as other info like what season it was for, and word count, here is a link to it!

What next?

First of all, I'm gonna spend a good long time reading other things. I've accumulated a great big To-Be-Read pile of pleasure reading consisting of both real-ass books and other fanfic that have been put at a lower priority while I powered through this project. I have had fun, but it is high time for a Break to read and do other stuff for a bit. (*glances nervously at my unstarted secsam project*)

If you happen to like my thoughts about what I'm reading, this past year I tried to keep track with reading log posts. They got stripped down to the basics over the course of the year and Finals Season sorta took it out of me so there's nothing for the past couple weeks BUT. i like reading a lot and i like talking about it a lot. so that's all tagged as #cal reading log if you want to keep up with me and my reading

and, what shall happen to these writeups! I'm not interested in continuing these in perpetuity, but I may give a final send off one when the tag hits 2000 (i'm still deciding). otherwise, this is likely the end of them. I might still shout out inidivudual cool fics that get published as I read them, but that's just like, good fandom practice to spread around cool fanworks tbh, rather than this weird thing I've done. nonetheless, i hope y'all had fun watching this journey

and a final thank you to all of the lovely authors who have made fanfic writing their hobby and have chosen to share what they write with others. Thank you! it is extremely obvious that I could not have done this if they never put pen to page or fingertip to keyboard and did the dang thing in the first place. you've made some cool stuff and i like reading it.

Happy New Year Everyone!

#fatt fic marathon #friends at the table #fatt

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sumaneun-stars · 1 year ago

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'Escape : My Cold Heart'

Pairing. Nishimura riki x fem!reader

Genre. Childhood friends to lovers, fluff, angst

Warnings. None!

Synopsis. You thought you could be with Riki forever, until one day changed everything. Years later, his absence didn't stop you from witnessing your dream, although he promised he'd be there with you.

A/n: I thought of this after I found out there was a comet called Nishimura which was recently discovered omg TT. Anyways I hope you like it!<3

“Run!” you heard from a distance. “Faster!”

You ran along the fields of grass and the wall of mountains, under the blanket of stars above. You ran along the never ending path towards your one desire. So far but so close, the collection of dust and ice, running beside earth to find a place to land- a place to call… ‘home’.

“Times up!” your coach announced for the 4th time, the only time you heard.

Snap.

Your feet stopped. You looked down at the paved ground with painted, yellow lines. You lifted your heavy head up, to see the disappointing view of beige colored concrete walls around you, followed by students dressed in their P.E wear, including you.

You made your way to your previous position, having no improvement from the last time. You sighed, looking down at your worn out sport shoes, which were gold to you.

'Escape is what I need' you thought to yourself.

You heard the last bell ring, and went straight to your best friend, Heather. You took her by the hand, walking out of school with her. You stopped on the nearest pavement bench and sat her down.

"Heather, I need a favor," you said.

You would never be the one to ask for help. You would always fend for yourself, and laugh at the word, 'dependent'. There was not an ounce of mischief in your face- making Heather know that you said this with all seriousness.

"Tell me"

She trusted you, at all costs.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

You walked down the busy streets of Tokyo, ears filled by the sounds of the honking of vehicles, the sweeping of leaves and the never ending talks of society. You wished you were in a movie. Where the main character would walk along the peaceful roads, admiring the beautiful red leaves falling from trees, which paved the way for him/ her. You sighed.

'Escape is what I need' you thought to yourself.

You took out the spare key in your pocket, opening the door.

"I'm home" you announced.

Your mother greeted you with a hug, and that's when you performed step 1.

"Mom" you looked up at her.

"Hm?"

"Heather invited me for a sleepover, can I go?"

With 15 minutes worth of interrogation, she finally allowed you.

You entered your small room, opening your cupboard and taking out a till. It had been five years since it was filled with a single penny, and now it was up to the brim. You took the hammer which you stole from your brother (it was lying around), and broke it open.

You gasped. You had never seen this much money in your life, ever. You spread it out, looking for the one.

There it was. The penny where it all started. There was a note taped on it, saying, 'I hope we get there, make it happen for us'. You softly smiled, reading the note which he wrote to you, five years ago, before he left.

You collected the money, emptying it into a polythene bag and putting it deep down into your backpack. You packed up all the necessary items for traveling, including the hopefully not expired snacks you kept hidden in your drawers.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

You got out of the taxi, your backpack hanging on one shoulder. You looked up at the beautiful, huge house in front of you. It was almost three times bigger than yours.

"Have a great time, honey. Be careful when coming back home, I have work so can't pick you up" your mother said, closing the door of the car.

You watched as the vehicle slowly disappeared. You rang the bell, and soon saw the door open, with the familiar face smiling at you.

"Hey y/n!" She greeted you.

"Hey"

She smiled.

"Well-"

"Here you go" she handed over a larger than usual lunchbox, wrapped up in a checked cloth with spoons and chopsticks attached. You were about to hug her, but got interrupted by the weird material which you felt under the lunchbox. You turned it over, to see an envelope. You opened it, finding money inside.

You smiled lovingly, tears rolling down your cheeks as you stepped forward to hug her.

"Thank you, Heather. Thank you so much" you said, your voice muffled with all the sobbing. She hummed, patting your back.

She parted the hug, caressing your shoulders.

"Be safe, okay?" She said, giving you a sad smile. "Call me if anything's wrong"

"Hm" You replied, watching her step behind, closing her front door, mouthing a silent 'bye' with a wave.

You had calculated all the expenses carefully, leaving enough money to buy a seat in the 'third class - reserved' section.

You sat yourself down on an empty bench, sighing. You looked at your watch. '5 minutes more' you said to yourself.

You felt something brushing on your leg. You bent down, spotting a ginger colored cat with sparkling eyes, just like his. You carried it and placed it next to you. The cat meowed at you, rubbing its nose on your fingers which reached out at it. You smiled.

"I'll name you… Riki" you said softly, patting its head.

Soon enough, the train arrived. You took a deep breath as you got onto the carriage, and took your seat. You reached out to your pockets, taking out the penny. You caressed it with your thumb, smiling at the words written on it.

"Hello," the girl who was sitting next to you, said.

You smiled. "Hi"

"What's your name?" She asked.

"Y/n, yours?"

"Suki," she smiled brightly. "Where are you headed?"

(5 years ago)

"Hey y/n! C'mere!" He called you.

"What's up?" You asked him, sitting cross- legged beside him on the ground.

He took out an empty till, and placed it in front of you both.

"Let's collect. Let's start collecting so that, five years from now, on September 4th, we can come here and witness the comet, together" he said.

You smiled, and nodded in agreement.

He took out a penny from his pocket, along with a pen and a tiny notebook. He wrote something down, tore the page and pasted it on the penny. He refused to show you. So for five years, you didn't know what he had written.

"Show me!"

"Never!"

You started chasing him. You chased him along the same fields of grass and wall of mountains, the sounds of both of your laughter filling your ears.

He ran back to the till and inserted the coin.

"No!" You screamed, tripping on his foot and falling sideways on his stomach.

He groaned in pain.

You both started laughing uncontrollably in each other's hold, feeling warm- and safe.

You took a breath after laughing, moving yourself to rest on his stretched out arm. He turned, smiling at you. You looked into his eyes- but they looked somewhat… sad.

"What's wrong?" You asked.

He hummed. "I'll tell you later, when we get back home" he replied.

And so he did tell you once you got back home- that he was leaving. He refused to tell you why, but he promised that he'd make a better version of himself, for you. He didn't say when, but he'd come back.

(The present)

You felt a pat on your shoulder, making your head shoot up.

"Excuse me? Your stop is in about 15 minutes" Suki informed you.

"O- oh. Thank you" you smiled.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

3.30 a.m.

30 minutes more.

You grabbed your backpack, an extra bottle of water, an extra jacket, your phone, and walked out of the tiny room which you rented for the night.

You walked along the empty road, with only a few street lights here and there which guided you. Your hands shivered, for the coldness of the deep night.

Your footsteps were the only sounds you could hear, along with your now pounding heart. You would be lying if you said you weren’t scared. The main characters in movies did it so easily, without an inch of fear in them.

You switched on the torch of your phone, because you were no longer on the streets. You were now far away from the place you stayed at, but you came this far for what? To turn back? Certainly not.

You spotted the small, rocky road to the fields of your childhood, and started following it.

Your feet stopped. Not because you reached the place, but because you could see the outline of a person- a rather tall person.

You took a step behind, but realized that there was no use- the person would've already known you were there, because you were the only source of artificial light. But why didn't he turn to look at you? Why was he looking up? Was he here to see the comet too?

You raised the torch to his face, feeling a hint of bravery. He turned to your direction, covering his face with his hand because of the light.

'Wait… could it be…?'

"R- Riki? You asked. "I- is that you?"

You moved the light from his face, and he moved his hand away. He smiled softly. You dropped your phone on the soft ground, your hands and legs now trembling.

Your legs moved faster than your brain.

‘What are you doing?’ you asked yourself as you ran towards him, on the very same field of grass.

Soon you were in his grasp, his warmth taking over your body as he wrapped his arms tightly around you. You buried your head in his chest, sobbing softly. He caressed your hair, whispering tiny shh's into your ear, in hopes of comforting you.

You didn't want to let go of him, afraid that he'd leave you, forever.

"Y/n…" he said.

You were shocked at his voice. He wasn't the kid he was before, he had grown, and you felt a sense of pride in that. You looked up at his moonlit face, sinking into his black hole eyes.

"Y/n, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being there. I'm sorry for taking so long. But I've found a new me. A me that's ready to take care of you, and cherish you with all my heart. A me that will give you all the love you deserve and more. A me that would spend every cent on you- who would die for you, and kill for you" he spilled out.

"Y/n, please love me" he pleaded. He looked into your eyes so desperately, that even a stranger would say yes.

You smiled, nodding your head. Tears refused to stop rolling down your cheeks and you held him in your arms.

He brought his hands from your back to your jaws, holding them delicately. He pressed his soft lips on your forehead, your skin tingling at his touch.

You looked at him, admiring his every detail, until-

"Riki, look," you said, calmly.

You both looked up at the comet running past earth. It lightened up the whole sky with its vibrant colors. It was ethereal, beautiful, gorgeous- and every other synonym to describe heaven.

He lay himself down on the cold, wet grass, pulling you down with him. You rested your head on his stretched out arm, looking up at the sight above.

"It's beautiful," you whispered.

He hummed. "Like you,"

And just like that, he thawed your once cold heart again.

End.

#enhypen niki #niki #niki x reader #enha scenarios #enha x reader #enha imagines #enha fluff #enha #enhypen #enhypen drabbles #enhypen fluff #enhypen oneshots

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doiesfav · 1 year ago

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˚ପ⊹Love letters - Doyoung ||

Pairing: non idol! Doyoung x fem! Reader

Plot: y/n works in a bakery, but one day she starts to receive love letters which always included the same perfume called “February to April”

Genre: fluff, romance, non idol! AU, fictional, very very very short story

Contains: Cuss words, overthinking

A/n: this is way too short than intentioned LMAO [but one of the next stories is gonna be good and long ;)]

MASTERLIST

｡.｡:∞♡*

(y/n’s pov)

The 4th letter

Dear y/n,

This is another letter for you again, these past weeks I realized how deep is my love towards you. Every time I’m near you I can feel my warmth, sweetness, and of course it soon became difficult for me to shut you out of my mind.

After every time we part ways, the wonderful memories always full my heart to not make me desire you even more.

The perfume I always give you are so special that by now you must have realized I create them myself. I just want to let you know that I love you and hope you this time I won’t be a coward and confess my love for you.

From dy.

I read all of it, it was weird, really weird. This is the fourth letter this month I could say that he looked sweet but at the same time I didn’t who it was so I also felt scared.

What if it was an stalker? And if it was someone I knew? But who is “dy”? Overthinking is something I do every time but it always end up the same, no answers.

Without realising I pulled an all nighter thinking about him “What if he shows up tomorrow?”

On my way to work i stared all the people around me, and when I was preparing the shop the first costumer came in.

“Good morning, one red velvet cake please” I recognized him, he was handsome, elegant, and well mannered. If I had a chance with that boy I would totally do.

But while preparing his order I just dazed and stared at him, he was looking around while playing with his finger. Fuck that was hot, until he said “So, did you receive the letter” while winking at me.

My jaws dropped hard and eyes wide opened towards him, I could not believe it, he was the man I dreamed of all this time. How could he fall in love with such an ordinary girl like me.

“Are you fucking crazy” it non intentionally slipped out of my mouth, I stepped back not knowing what to do “what if I get kidnapped by this guy” that thought crossed my mind and self reacted to the situation.

But he just giggled “My actual name is Doyoung, Kim Doyoung” and then grabbed my hand and smelled it “So you have been using my perfume, isn’t that amazing” I couldn’t move my body at all.

“Could you give me a chance? I swear I’m a good guy” My heart wanted it but my brain told me not to do it, it was like devil and angel on my shoulders.

“promise?” I finally gave in, what could go wrong anyway? “Promise” after those words doyoung hugged me as if it was the end of the world, so I hugged him back.

This hug felt eternal in a good way, it was like a puzzle piece, perfect to fit. We were a perfect fitting.

“Wanna go to the park after your shift?” He said sweetly, I nodded my head and got back to work. I saw him smile right after leaving waving at me.

Idk if this is good prob gonna remake it later TT

Thanks for reading~~!

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lprww · 1 year ago

Text

╰┈➤ Project: Sights

— Sypnosis; ✎ Niki, a student at decelis academy, has a project to fulfil which consists of doing a collage with the photos he takes in the following week. The subject; sights he finds appealing and beautiful. What he didn’t know was that you were going to be apart of them.

— Pairing; Student N. Riki x Student Fem!reader

— Genre/warnings; Fluff, one sided crush, cursing, au, This story is mostly Riki’s pov.

— W.C.; 2k

— A/N; This is my first tumblr ff! Not going to lie it isn't my best, but I hope it's still readable TT. English is not my first language and I apologize if I did make any mistakes (it isn't proofread)! Anyways, enjoy reading ^^

It was now lunchtime, so I sat down in the cafeteria along with the rest of my friend group just like the usual. They were all chatting while I had my mind on something else while eating.

"what's on your mind Riki?" asked Heeseung.

I got back to reality as I felt a nudge from Sunoo.

"Oh, uhm it's nothing."

"Okay..." he eyed me suspiciously "anyways, what was I saying? Ah right, so..."

I returned to eating my food and zoning out at the thought of the girl.

Flashbacks (a few days earlier)

It was the last class of the day and I was sitting down with my bag occupying the place next to me in the back of the class. “I will now assign you a project to complete by next week.” said Mr. Hwang as he wrote in depth information on the chalkboard. “All of you, individually, will have to do a collage with multiple photos that you will take in the span of a week. It can be anything, so you all should get creative and find some nice looking subjects.”

My eyes sparkled at the thought of finally being able to showcase my skills in photography. I looked out the window while thinking of what I could take pictures of.

The bell rang and I got up walking towards the exit of the classroom. It was the end of the day, so I took my things and decided to go to the local park near my place.

While checking my phone, I took notice that this weekend was Mother's day and I decided to get something for my mom in advance which resulted in me going to the flower shop instead, picking out a bouquet, and taking pictures of the flowers for the school project.

Then you walked in.

The sound of the door opening farther away from where I was picked my interest and made me slightly turn my head around as a reflex to take a glimpse of the new customer.

You walked in gracefully with your hair plopping down your shoulders. They were a dark shade of red which matched very well your necklace that adorned your neck wonderfully. For some people you might've looked intimidating, but as soon as you entered the shop, the cashier instantly looked at you with a smile on their face. Then, you both engaged in a conversation which made you laugh here and there. I suppose you failed to notice how long I was looking at you, but how could I not when you were looking so magnificent?

'Hold up... I sound so down bad right now... I don't even know her...' I thought as I mentally slapped myself and looked back at the roses before me to snap a few pictures.

I got up from the crouching position I was in, and decided to head out the store to start organizing my collage at home. Of course not forgetting to pay for the bouquet. and staring at you quietly

+++

I arrived home with the flowers behind my back as I walked towards the kitchen to find my mom cooking food for diner. I tapped her shoulder and handed it to her which she thanked me for. I then went up the stairs to my room and let myself fall onto my bed and daydream of you while wiggling from side to side like a lost cause.

'Am I actually falling in love at first sight like in those kdramas?? No way.'

+++

I woke up to my alarm going off. I got ready to go to school and headed out.

I walked through the main doors of the building and then to my locker where I found Jungwon, one of my friends, waiting for me.

"Yah Riki, what's up?" he asked finding my unusual calm self odd.

"Nothing..." I replied confused by my own feelings.

Jungwon looked at me then closed his eyes and sighed.

"Yeah right... What is it now be honest."

My eyes shifted to his and quickly back to my things.

"I went to the flower shop close to my place yesterday..." I started.

"...And??"

"I saw this girl... I have no idea who she was though..." I continued on talking about the situation of yersterday for a bit and Jungwon just kept looking at me and nodding till realization hit him.

"Can you describe her physical appearances? I might have an idea on who you're talking about... " said the shorter friend.

"Uh... she has dark red hair that are quite long I guess? She also wore a red necklace that matched her hair..." I said confused on why my friend asked me what she looked like.

'Is he trying to tell me he used to like her or something...' I mentally told myself as I subconsciously stared blankly at the ground.

"Yep I know who that is... Actually-" Won said till I shushed him with my hand covering his mouth.

"No don't tell me you like her? Right?" I nervously said while glaring at him.

The guy chuckled and removed my hand from his mouth before speaking.

"No no. I don't like her that way don't worry. You're talking about y/n that popular girl." He stated as I looked away due to my false assumption.

"Popular girl?" I questioned putting back my attention to my friend.

"Yah, you really are clueless huh?" he said jokingly.

"Well sorry for not knowing everyone in school." I said as I rolled my eyes.

Jungwon continued to look at me with a wide smile on his face until I finally looked back at him puzzled.

"Why are you looking at me like that hyung…?"

"Oh Riki... Dear Riki..." he started, inching his face closer to mine.

He closed his eyes giggling then gave me a look of amusement.

"I think you might've fallen in love for the first time" he said smirking.

I gave him a disapproval look which made his smirk grow even more.

“Yep, you’ve definitely fell in love!” He confirmed, jumping around saying it out loud.

The students eyes were on us as I went forward grabbing Jungwon and shushing him.

“STOP. I don’t like her!” I said with a stern look.

“Riki, you do know that you’re currently proving my point right?”

Confused, I took his arm and brought him away from the crowd of people that were around us whispering to eachother.

‘Did I hear that right?’ ‘Riki likes y/n… poor him’ ‘I think he doesn’t know that y/n isn’t interested in dating for now…’ whispered the students to eachother. Fortunately, the two guys were already far away.

“What are you talking about??”

Jungwon eye smiled me and said;

“You’re in denial Riki”

+++

For the next few days, I tried concentrating on the project to finish it before the deadline. However, my mind kept thinking of other things that were irrelevant. You for example. I started to truly consider my friend’s word and seeing you again confused me even more proved Jungwon’s point.

Flashback

As I was walking in the corridor with my music blasting in my ears, I heard a familiar laugh that caught my attention yet again. It was yours. You were with your friends talking about who knows what. At that moment though, your eyes met mine. You smiled at me tenderly while I returned it and quickly spun around embarrassed.

Present

‘Was Jungwon right?’ I kept asking myself. ‘What should I do…’

+++

The time to turn in our projects came along with an announcement from Mr. Hwang.

“The best collage will be exposed on the cork board outside this class for the students to see by tomorrow.”

I kept mentally telling myself that it’d be nice to see mine there while I, like my usual daily routine, walked home.

+++

The next day, I found Jungwon at my locker yet again and decided to turn around and walk in the opposite direction to avoid getting bugged about my ‘first love’.

As I did so, my friend instantly ran up to me and announced something unexpected.

“YAH NISHIMURA RIKI! NICE WORK THAT COLLAGE IS AMAZING!!” He said which which made me gasp.

“Wait… I got chosen??” I questioned as I felt happiness take over me.

“YEP! You should definitely go check it”

I smiled, curious of what it looks like and what others think about it.

Speeding through the groups of students that occupied the hallway, I finally arrived at the board to see my project on it. A sigh of relief escaped my lips before quickly changing to a wide smile as I small jumped around, cheering myself.

“Excuse me?” Said a girl behind me.

“Yes? Do you need something?” I replied not turning around.

“Are you the person that made that?” She asked.

I looked behind me with a smile plastered on my face and my eyes closed and affirmed that it was infact mine.

“Ooh! It’s very beautiful, I love flowers!” Said the student. “I’m y/n!”

“I’m Riki, nice to meet yo-” I chocked on my saliva as I opened my eyes and saw you.

‘Holy shit-’ was the only thing that came to my mind before Jungwon grabbed my arm and smiled at the girl infront of us.

“Hi y/n!” He said smiling warmly.

She smiled back.

“Jungwon, hello!”

I side eyed him so he could notice. Which he did, but that was his plan. To make me jealous and accept my feelings. And of course it didn’t work

It did

“Hey y/n we’ll be back alright, I have to ask something to Won real quick.”

She nodded

“Okay, take your time!”

We left and went a bit further away then I stopped in my track.

“Jungwon, no.” I said furrowing my brows.

He laughed and showed his dimples.

“Just accept your feelings Niki! It’s not that hard”

“Mhm… yeah whatever” I mumbled.

“Huh? What’d you say?”

“Okay… maybe I DO have feelings for y/n.”

I looked down as I could feel myself heating up.

“WOOO finally!!” He said taking me in a side hug. “See? Wasn’t so hard, yeah?”

“If you say so…”

+++

‘I tried multiple times to get closer to you but I have a feeling that you don’t think the same way of me. We did get closer but I feel like what I feel towards you only worsen considering that you probably won’t feel the same way if I do end up telling you the truth. Maybe this is only a crush and I’ll eventually fall out of love. We’ll have to wait and see. If we should be together, I believe fate will make us meet again one day.’

This was all I wrote before giving up on you, or at least for now, since I had to move back to Japan due to the worsening health of my grandma.

Time skip 5 years later

Finally back in the city of Seoul, I entered my new work place and went to the boss's office to have a talk with him before officially being a worker here. In Japan, I had continued my passion for photography and became even better which influenced my career path decision. I opened the door after knocking to see a man standing up Infront of a desk and another woman who was facing the opposite direction. The head of the company then looked at me and smiled.

"He's here" he said.

"Welcome new worker!" said the woman.

As I switched from looking at the boss to the other female worker, my mouth went agape and so did the woman's.

"Oh! You're Riki right? From school" she questioned still smiling warmly.

'She remembers me…' I mentally told myself.

"Ah! Yes that's me, y/n right?" I replied trying to sound as natural as possible.

"Yep! Glad to see you again" she said.

"Same goes to you"

Looks like we’re back to square one huh? I guess fate really do exists…

THE END

—> Bookshelf!!

TAGLIST <3;

@chaewon-slays

#enhypen #enha niki #nishimura riki #fanfic #niki fluff #enha x reader #enha fanfic #enha au #riki fluff #riki x y/n #niki x reader #enhypen fluff #riki x you #enha imagines

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lgcmedia · 1 year ago

Photo

I couldn't go to the Spring Boys concert the other day ( so sad ) but I decided to fill the hole in my heart by watching all of the fancams of my favorite trainees online. When I was watching Noeul's I noticed something when I got to the end while they were doing the closing part of the concert... :( I don't know what happened but he looked like he crumpled a bit and kept turning around to hide his face. He mentioned in his post he didn't tear up but that's probably what happened!

Anyway, I felt so bad but suddenly Seojin ran over and wrapped an arm around him. I guess to offer him some comfort or something. When I looked at his fancam, too, he stood there looking really concerned until he finally went over, even if it meant moving from his spot.

They seem like they're really close, too. Noeul even hugged him back! I barely saw them interact during the variety show. I really feel like we were robbed from seeing their dynamic. They both have such unique personalities. Seojin is really clever and Noeul is too mischievous. I think it would be a riot to see them bantering.

[ + / - ] I was there right in front of him. It looked like Noeul started crying or something. Anyway, doesn't this read performative to you? I don't buy it at all. -_-

[ + / - ] the way seojin rushed over seems off to me. does he not have enough fans of his own so he's trying to show noeul's he's such a 'good guy' to try to win us over? lol

[ + / - ] Tbh it's a really cute interaction... TT I love seeing the dynamic between the trainees and they've probably known each other for a long time. Please look after each other!!

▷ load next 15 comments?

#lgc:netizens #lgcseojin #lgcxnoeul

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0mysticjungle0 · 2 years ago

Note

Thank you for the kind words about my own retrospective journey as a BBRae Shipper. I'm not sure if you were on BBRae Shrine Forum that I mentioned at the same time, but if you were, we're still active. XD Anyway, apologies for not reblogging your reblog but this feels like a cleaner way of responding to your comments. I've also added some extra content to the post since you look at it, spelling and grammar corrections, expanding a few sections to better represent my points. Just general improvements overall.

TTG! like I said was never really my cup of tea, but I've come to accept its place on the airwaves. Like I said, I can't be mad at a show that is so very clearly at peace with what it is. And obviously, it has found an audience beyond me. Like Beast Boy in the finale, one must inevitably accept change. It is what it is. But I can't deny, making BBRae canon with the original cast, even on a silly show such as that... does feel good.

Well, all the same, in less than a week Beast Boy and Raven will be back in my life in a new series where they're apparently taking center stage. So really, I can't complain in any case, we've all gotten what we wanted. We won, friend... we all won. Thank you for sharing a bit in my look back at my own journey and I hope to see you around the Tumblrs... I mean we're kinda stuck here considering the state of Twitter. But I digress.

You're very welcome. I thank you for making me feel a little less alone. I don't think I remember being in that forum through. Two years ago I was in a very active TT group which was real fun and had I people to talk about this stuff with, but admin shut down the group out of the blue.

I'm a little out of touch with the comics so I finally got what the whole hype for Titans Academy is for.

Right now, I'm just getting over the Titans finale. I know they weren't romantically linked in this media (although the recent "Heroes in Love" featurette video might suggest something), they were absolutely adorable and soulmates in every way.

It certainly has been gratifying seeing this ship in every version of themselves. We win some, we lose some. And sometimes even "losing" feels like winning in this ship.

So, here's to hoping I'm still reading BBRae fics on my deathbed.

#gif stolen from #not-so-mundane-after-all #bbrae

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dirk-rider · 1 year ago

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TT: I’m here.

TT: I knocked for like five minutes and you still didn’t come to the door goddamn.

TT: Are you taking a massive shit or something?

TT: I bet you’re on the toilet going “Aw damn Dirk’s coming over and my toilet smells like a horse’s asshole right now”.

TT: That’s totally what you’re saying to yourself.

GT: Sorry im on my way to the door right now!

GT: I was just putting dinner in the oven my apologies!

TT: Dude it’s 13:00 why are you making dinner already. You probably just finished eating lunch.

GT: Well yes but im making ham! You cant undercook ham or youll feel ill and have to go home early and i dont want you leaving so soon!

TT: I don’t particularly mind being sick. I’ll just vomit all over your grandpa’s fuckin’ bearskins.

As Dirk sent his message, the door swung open in front of him and he was quickly pulled into a tight hug.

“Dirk, it’s so good to see your face! I’m so glad you could make it this early!” Jake said, giving Dirk a rough pat on the back.

Dirk coughed a bit into Jake’s neck at the force before replying “Yeah man, you said this series was long as hell. Figured we should start early.”

Jake let go of Dirk and stepped back. “Yes it is! Downton Abbey is quite a cinematic marvel, it’s a wonder it went on as long as it did!” He gestured towards the door. “After you!”

So Dirk stepped inside and looked around, still not entirely used to the… odd decor Mr. Harley used. He didn’t particularly dwell on it, though - the kitchen was already wafting out scents that made Dirk feel hungry. He felt his stomach rumble and put an arm around it reflexively, blushing a bit at the noise.

“Didn’t eat lunch again?” he heard from behind him, and spun around quickly to face Jake.

“Um,” was all he managed to reply. Of course he hadn’t eaten lunch, who has time to eat lunch? He was a busy guy and he didn’t need food, anyway. His mind had been occupied with other, more important things, like researching the best way to use a hydraulic system in a partially animated stuffed animal, as any normal guy would.

“It’s alright, I figured as much,” Jake chuckled. “I set out some snacks for you in the living room.”

“Uh thanks man. You didn’t have to do that, though,” Dirk tried saying, before his stomach let out another sharp growl. He grimaced. “Fine, I’ll eat something.”

Jake smiled. “Sweet! Well then, go make yourself comfortable! Just wait one moment for me to finish what I’m doing, and I’ll be right on out to join you!”

Dirk nodded. “Alright, see you in a minute.”

He made his way down the hallway until he found the living room, and was admittedly quite grateful for the sheer mount of snacks Jake had piled up.

He flopped down on the couch and grabbed the remote, quietly mumbling to himself as he turned the television on and started flicking through streaming services looking for whatever the fuck Jake wanted to watch. Some show about British people, that’s about all he knew.

Eventually he got to Jake’s watchlist and began scrolling down, looking for anything vaguely British looking. Jake was the only person he knew who actually used the watchlist feature, but hey, someone had to.

As he was scrolling he reached down and grabbed a handful of potato chips from one of the bowls Jake had laid out, leaning forward a bit as he shoved them into his mouth. He was really quite hungry, no matter how much he denied it. And he’d do pretty much anything to make the embarrassing noises from his midsection go away before Jake got back.

Finally he found the show and squinted his eyes to read the description.

“This historical drama follows the lives of the Crawley family and their servants in the family's Edwardian country house.”

Goddamn this sounded boring already.

Oh well, Jake seemed pretty excited to show this to Dirk, so he figured it’d only be nice of him to bear through it.

Especially since there was food.

He blushed a bit again but didn’t stop shoving chips into his mouth, only hoping he could eat enough before Jake got back so he didn’t have to embarrass himself.

After about five minutes, Jake came waltzing into the room and plopped himself down on the seat next to Dirk. He smiled when he looked at the television.

“Oh, good, you found it already!” he exclaimed, clapping his hands a bit. “You’ll love it, I just know it! Maybe in a sort of ironic fashion, but love it nonetheless!”

Dirk snorted. “What do you mean I’d enjoy it ‘ironically’? This shit looks so fucking real. Real as shit,” he said sarcastically. “Seriously though, I’m already asking myself why you’re so into this. Is it really that exciting?”

Jake grinned wider. “Oh, heavens no! It’s the most boring shit I have ever seen!”

Dirk sighed, then laughed a bit as he said, “Well turn it on already, I’m so damn excited you don’t even know.”

So Jake did just that, and Dirk leaned back a bit as the show began. And yep, it was pretty much as good as he expected.

As they watched, Dirk would make occasional comments and jabs at the characters, and soon he became so preoccupied with this that he hardly noticed how much he was eating. He only really went quiet when his hand reached the bottom of the bowl.

“Is everything alright?” Jake asked, looking to face Dirk.

Dirk quickly looked away before replying, “Uh yeah, sorry. I just, uh, finished that entire thing. Heh.” And lord, had he really?? Admitting that was almost… arousing.

No, it was definitely arousing, and Dirk knew it.

“Oh, that’s alright!” Jake replied. “There’s more, you know! One more bowl of chips and a box of cookies, all storebought but still quite good!”

“Uhh yeah. Thanks, man.” Dirk flushed a bit. God, he really wanted to eat all of that.

Really, the only thing stopping him was that he felt Jake had started catching onto what he was doing.

See, Dirk had began playing this little game with himself. He’d known since he was young that something about food was incredibly arousing to him, and when he realized how oblivious Jake tended to be, he began challenging himself to eat as much as he could on their dates. It made him incredibly flustered, but also incredibly aroused. Knowing he was doing something he would regularly get off to, right in front of his oblivious boyfriend, was like some sick kind of foreplay to him.

Recently, though, he got the feeling Jake was catching on. He’d ask questions, like “how much are you planning on eating today?” And he’d offer him more and more food, and he was just acting… different. So Dirk decided he had to cut back around Jake, at least for the time being.

At the same time, though, he didn’t want to be rude and just ignore all this that Jake had set out for him…

He grabbed a handful of popcorn and shoved that into his mouth, too.

About five episodes in Dirk had gone through another bowl of chips, a bowl of popcorn, and an entire box of cookies. Jake had also gotten up momentarily to “check on the food”, and had come back with an orange soda, which Dirk had downed as well.

His stomach was already gurgling quietly, but after so many months of regular sessions similar to this, he knew he could still get more food in there if he wanted.

He noticed Jake occasionally looking over at his stomach, but he never said anything, so neither did Dirk. Instead, he would fill space where they should be talking with admittedly less and less ironic rambles pertaining to the characters.

As he was cursing out a character named Matthew for not making any moves towards a girl named Mary (holding quite a few parallels to how he used to feel towards Jake, though he’d never admit it), he heard a bell ding.

“Oh, dinners almost ready! Alright, Dirk, I’ll be back in a jiffy to grab you!” Jake exclaimed, getting up.

Dirk looked up at him. “Man alright, take your time.”

“Will do! Should be about ten, fifteen minutes, give or take,” Jake said, flipping the light switch on. “I’ll see you then!” And he was gone.

Now that Dirk was alone on the couch, he felt safe pulling his shirt up a bit and admiring his stomach. It was shaping out nicely around his jeans, and he had a slight bloated muffin top, but he exercised enough that he still had a nice set of abs beneath it.

He pulled out his phone to take a quick picture, then went to scroll through his social media feeds while he waited for Jake to come back. As he was scrolling, he rested his free hand on his stomach and rubbed small circles around it, knowing this would ease the bloating at least a bit and make it easier for him to eat dinner without looking exceedingly stuffed. He patted his stomach and forced out a short belch to clear out some more space that was filled with gas bubbles from the soda he’d downed, and sighed.

God, he wished he could absolutely fill himself to the brim with good food, but he knew he couldn’t, not without fear of Jake calling him out. So instead he just continued on readying himself for the next meal and tried to distract his mind through reading mindless drivel.

Eventually, he heard his name, and looked up to see Jake standing over him. He quickly pulled his shirt down, hoping to look casual while doing so.

“Dinners ready!” Jake smiled down at him. “And I hope you’re hungry, because I made a lot!”

Dirks face reddened and he hoped to god that Jake didn’t notice as he replied, “Alright, I’m coming.”

“Swell!”

So the two walked down to the dining room, Jake leading the way.

When they got there, Jake pulled out one of the many seats for Dirk before heading to sit on the opposing end. The table was one meant for large gatherings, so the two sitting across from each other without anyone there made for a slight dissonance, but Jake seemed used to it by now. He’d already placed dinner on the table, too - half of a glazed ham sat in between the two, alongside a large bowl of assorted fruits (most of which Dirk couldn’t even name), and a few toasted bread buns.

“I hope you like it!” Jake smiled, resting his hands underneath his chin.

“Wow, man, this is… this looks so good. This smells so good. …You’re really spoiling me, huh?” Dirk chuckled lightly, and Jake looked very pleased with himself.

“Of course I am! I am your boyfriend, after all!” Jake smiled back at him. But there was a slight malicious undertone that Dirk wasn’t sure he was imagining.

To distract himself, he cut out a chunk of the meat and laid it on his plate. And as he took a bite, his eyes widened.

Dear lord if this wasn’t the best thing he’d tasted in a while.

He quickly cut out another bit and shoved it into his mouth, too, and then another, and another. And this time, he wasn’t even intentionally doing this to get off - it was genuinely amazing food.

As he was reaching for more of the ham, Jake’s voice came from across the table.

“Make sure to get some of the other things I’ve set out as well! I didn’t put all of this work in for nothing!”

Dirk nodded and took an admittedly large portion of the fruit plate (much larger than he’d intended, it was a really big spoon) and one of the bread rolls.

“Sorry I didn’t have too much variety in this meal, by the way! I figured you’d be more comfortable with something I know you like, so I really only set out things we’ve previously discussed.”

“Are you kidding? This shit slaps, man! You’re fucking fantastic!” Dirk replied, looking up and across at Jake. And he really meant it. Despite how he felt in situations like this, the sexiness factor was currently almost entirely replaced by admiration. It meant a lot more than he could ever put into words.

“Oh thank you, haha! I just wanted to make sure you could get good and full!” Jake replied.

Shit now the sexiness factor was back.

Dirk blushed a bit but said nothing, instead just going back to his own plate of food.

As the two ate they chatted about the series they’d been watching moments earlier, Jake going on a bit of a monologue quite a few times as he explained how “the narrative really almost plays second fiddle to just how much they put into this camerawork!” and stuff like that. And Dirk didn’t mind, honestly he was just relieved he didn’t have to say too much, as his stomach began filling out more and he couldn’t focus on too much else.

The pressure in his gut was becoming a lot if he was honest, and he was trying desperately to not find arousal in this, not now. He had to stop soon, he told himself, before his feelings made themselves known.

So Dirk put his utensils down and leaned back in his seat, hoping to say without words that he was done.

Jake noticed, though, and quickly interrupted his own ramblings.

“Aww, come on, Dirk! I’m sure you can fit just a little more food in that stomach of yours!” he exclaimed.

Shit if that sentence wasn’t enough to pop a boner.

“Sorry man, I’m stuffed,” Dirk replied, closing his eyes for a moment.

Next thing he knew, though, Jake was at his side, putting another few slices of meat on Dirk’s plate, alongside two more bread rolls.

“I bet you can at least eat this much,” he said. “I made all of this for you, you know! Would be a waste if someone didn’t eat it!”

Dirk opened one eye to look up at him.

“Can’t you just leave it for leftovers?” he mumbled, furrowing his brow and hoping to god Jake didn’t look down at Dirk’s pants.

Jake chuckled a bit. “Well of course I’ll leave some for a later date! But it’s still best fresh out of the oven, you know?” He patted Dirk on the shoulder. “So eat up!”

Dirk groaned slightly. If Jake would stop saying hot shit he might be a little more agreeable, but he knew he’d just keep pestering him until he finished what was on his plate, so he picked up one of the rolls and brought it to his mouth. Jake seemed pleased by this and went back to his side of the table.

As Dirk continued eating, he looked over at Jake. “Why don’t you have more? You’re real insistent on getting me all good and stuffed like a thanksgiving turkey, but you’ve hardly eaten half of what I have.” He forced a laugh to hopefully sound more playful.

Jake smiled smugly. “Dirk, you have a stomach of steel! I don’t think anyone could fit nearly as much in there as you can!”

Dirk let that run through his mind. He couldn’t find any counterarguments, so he just continued plowing on. The pressure in his stomach only became more and more noticeable, though, and with it so did the pressure in his pants. A few times as he was eating he had to stop to let rumbling belches into his fist, which only really made the problem in his pants worse. And then Jake would give his own plaudits on each one, which really cemented it all.

After what felt like forever, Dirk’s plate was finally empty, and he sighed as he slouched forward to put his head in his hands.

“Okay, man, I’mmrrUurp - fuck, sorry. I’m done.”

Jake grinned as the eructation forced itself past Dirk’s unwilling lips, and Dirk’s face heated.

“Oh, goodie! And look at you, too, all nice and filled up. You did extraordinarily, I’d say!” Jake told him, getting up from his seat and taking his diningware in one hand. “Oh, dear, apologies - could you slide that over to me?” he then asked, nodding towards Dirk’s plate, and Dirk nodded back as verification.

When he tried to get up, though, he realized his stomach was much heavier than he had previously thought. His brow furrowed, and he huffed as he got up to hand the plate to Jake. The table was wide enough that he couldn’t really reach Jake’s not-so-outstretched hand, so he had to lean forward. And leaning forward had the side effect of making sure the edge of the table cut directly into Dirk’s distended gut, forcing out a lengthy belch.

“bwoooOOAAaaaarrrphhh!!”

Dirk’s eyes shot open behind his shades, and he clamped the hand not holding himself upright over his mouth. Sick fuck that he was, of course he enjoyed the feeling.

“Oh, wow, Dirk, that one carried some absolute heft! I didn’t think you’d have room in your stomach to even hold that after such a dense meal. Nice work, bro!” Jake took Dirk’s plate from his outstretched hand and began walking back to the kitchen.

“Be a dear and go turn the telly back on?”

Dirk once again nodded, unwilling to open his mouth until he was alone once more. Jake was fucking with him, he just had to be fucking with him, there was no way he wasn’t fucking with him.

As Dirk made his way back to the living room, he found his second trip there much slower than the first due to the weight he held internally. He used this time to mull over whether Jake was finally certain one hundred percent in Dirk’s kinks. The way he complimented him wasn’t too far off from how it was when Dirk had first started, true. But it also felt as though Jake was now indulging Dirk, trying to get him to a point that he couldn’t deny his interest if his life depended on it. He was cooking larger and larger meals, feeding Dirk more and more, and now he was becoming pretty damn insistent, too.

When Dirk entered the living room, he took a precautionary step and took a blanket out of the basket (of course the English-Harleys had a blanket basket) to hopefully cover his arousal.

After he plopped down on the couch, he placed it atop himself in a way he hoped looked casual, as though he was totally not hiding anything at all. Because what was there to hide. Nothing, that’s what. Or, that’s what he told himself, at the very least.

He used one hand to hit the “on” button of the remote as his other hand ran through his hair, and he allowed himself a shaky breath out. He had to go full on denial mode, not allow his thoughts even a taste of arousal.

To do so, he went back to scrolling through his previous mindless online drivel, and it worked for the most part. His gut was still gurgling, and the sounds would pry his focus away from his distractions. But only for a few seconds, before he’d remind himself that now was most certainly not the time, not if he wanted to keep up the charade.

By the time Jake joined Dirk, Dirk had managed to get the majority of his blood back where it belonged. He looked up at Jake.

“Back so soon?”

“I told you I’d be no more than two shakes of a lamb’s tail!”

As he said this, Jake gave Dirk another pat on the back, which forced out a bit more gas than Dirk would have liked.

“Oopsadaisies, I nearly managed to forget your overburdened state. My bad, heheh.”

The tone he used, though, made it quite clear he had not forgotten. Not in the slightest.

“Well. Make yourself comfortable, I’m ready to continue where we left off if you are.”

“Right-o!”

So Dirk hit the play button and the two quickly got back into the swing of things, Jake pausing every so often to go on rants and rambles, restating his own marvelings, and Dirk swinging right back with his own disses.

At some point while the two were talking, Jake had managed to wiggle his way beneath the blanket as well, scooting a bit closer to Dirk as he did so. Dirk would have commented on this move, but he didn’t want to risk having anything thrown back at him, any questions asked about the reason for the cover in the first place, so he instead continued his speech.

“So. We can agree that there’s an absurd contrast between the A plot and the B plot, right? Like… they’re expecting us to take a flower show as seriously as a real, honest to god murder coverup. What the fuck.”

“There’s also feminism!” Jake added.

Dirk laughed at this, and the exhalation allowed another small burp to follow. “‘Scuse me, goddamn-“

As he excused himself, Jake placed his rough hand against Dirk’s abdomen, only for Dirk to reflexively grab it.

“What are you do-oouurp- what are you doing??”

Jake put on an apologetic face, but there was a smile threatening to break out from beneath it.

“What, can a guy not give his good pal a much-needed tummy rub?” he asked, fluttering his lashes. “Your eructations are becoming interruptions, I figured I’d try to get things settled so we could enjoy the show-!”

“The only show you’re enjoying right now is taking place inside my abdomen, English,” Dirk interrupted before he could think through his own word choice. He let go of Jake’s hand, though, and allowed it to fall back atop his distended middle.

Jake fell silent for a moment, before he began softly moving his hand against Dirk’s warm flesh.

“…I’m only enjoying it because you seem so enamored by your own gluttony, my good man.”

Dirk nearly choked on his own tongue.

He wasn’t sure what to say to that. He felt his face return to the bright red he was becoming used to tonight, but kept his mouth clamped shut.

“Not that that’s a bad thing, mind you! Really, I find your games quite charming.” Jake hit pause on the television.

“But you didn’t seriously think you were hiding it, did you?”

Jake’s ocular attention was now entirely directed towards Dirk’s face, and he looked away, unable to face the guy.

“Hiding what?” he asked, strained. Dirk suddenly felt the need to take a drink, his throat absolutely parched by nerves.

Jake’s expression turned thoughtful for a moment before he began once more.

“Your arousal, I suppose. That’s how this all appears to me, anyway,” he chuckled. Then he leaned in towards Dirk’s ear, as though he were readying himself to tell a secret.

Instead of a secret, though, Dirk’s senses were flooded with the sound of one of Jake’s own gaseous outbursts.

“There’s no use in denying it, Dirk. I see the way your fists are clenched, your breaths labored. I can feel your heart beating against my hand. You are loving this, Dirk.”

He leaned back a bit and thumped on his chest once more, then followed with another low belch. As he let it out he grabbed Dirk’s hand and guided it lower, then lower still, before he took the blanket off of the both of them and was met with a rather unsightly bulge on Dirk’s end.

“Peekaboo! Would you look at that, Dirk, hardened by eructations. Be they yours or mine, you enjoy the sound regardless.” He let go of Dirk’s hand and palmed around Dirk’s crotch, humming a bit.

“Oh, look at what I’ve done to you, Dirk. You’re bloated beyond belief and still have the capacities to get hard. You only have so much energy, and right now it all seems centered in one area.”

Dirk grunted at the touch but said nothing.

“Dirk, were you ever going to tell me how you felt about all this? Or did you enjoy the thrill of voyeurism too much? Has this all been a part of some sick ritual I’ve been forced to help indulge?”

“…When did you figure me out.”

That was all Dirk could really muster at this point. He’d been stripped down to his barest desires, exposed for the pervert he was, and it was driving him wild.

“Ohh, hmm, what a toughie… let’s see here.” Jake made a big display out of counting his fingers, and Dirk’s brow only furrowed further as he did so. Eventually Jake looked back up and grinned at Dirk.

“Well, I guess I’ve had an inkling for quite some time by now. I can’t quite pinpoint when I became certain, but the evidence just kept piling up until it became hard to say that you WEREN’T getting off to this, haha!”

Dirk groaned.

“Fuck, Jake, I’m. I should have told you. I guess it is pretty fucked up of me to get all hot and bothered, work towards my own pleasure, and not clue you into that fact. I just- you’re- you kept making it so easy, so hot, and-“

Jake cut Dirk off with a peck on the lips.

“Oh, hush, you,” he giggled, “I find the whole thing rather endearing.”

Dirk finally met Jake’s eyes. “Real- really, now..? You aren’t just saying that, rrrooUuurph… ngh, fuuuck.”

As he spoke, Jake hit a rather tight spot in Dirk’s gut and forced out another small belch.

“If I minded so, I wouldn’t be so eager to indulge you, now would I? I wouldn’t be making such meals, caressing your bloatation, allowing your crass noises to continue, now would I?”

Dirk sighed shakily.

“I- I guess not, no. Probably not.”

Jake grinned and began unzipping Dirk’s jeans.

“So why don’t we do something about this?”

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struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor · 1 year ago

Note

Regarding your last post, I thought the same while watching the behind the scenes of the MV. This is not a shade because I myself am not fluent in English and still need to improve a lot but to me it seems quite obvious Jungkook’s English isn’t as good as some Army like to pretend (I’m going to get call names…). I would say he’s around a low intermediate level, which is perfectly fine, he has a busy life so it doesn’t let him a lot of time to study. I guess his understanding is better than his speaking skills, which is usually the case for most of language learners, but orally I don’t think he fully grasps all the meanings and nuances and the slang etc. I just want to say again this is not me trying to belittle his abilities, it’s only my opinion, but to me it doesn’t look like he fully understands what he sings… his face expressions in that video, it looks like sometimes he was a bit clueless. I’m not saying he has no idea of what he is singing, obviously he got a full translation before accepting the project but he doesn’t look like he truly "feels" the lyrics and immerge himself in it. Idk, for me it lacks something and that video made me a bit uncomfortable. I know I’m being a bit dramatic but I can’t shake the feeling that the industry is using him for cash and immediate success without paying much attention to who he his, his personality, his artistry. And another collab is on the way with Kid Laroi apparently… I’m losing interest. I want to hear Jungkook on his own, with a song made only for him and that reflects who he is as a person and an artist. I miss that feeling, seeing him perform so honestly, when you can see on his face and hear in his voice how much he feels the song, how deep he goes to find the emotions and bring them to the surface. I truly hope there will be songs on his album that makes me feel connected to him again because at the moment it feels like I am totally unable to enjoy what he’s doing.

I don't even know if he bothered translating Jack Harlow's parts tbh. I remember one Run BTS episode where they had to sing their songs without using English, so they had to translate some lyrics to Korean, and, apart from RM, the members didn't even know what the English lyrics meant. I remember J-Hope being shocked, like, "So this is what this part means?", which was a bit wild for me since it was his song. Tbh, I don't bother reading the translation to most kpop songs. I only know what the tts mean because most MVs have subtitles now. If not, then too bad... Most songs have boring lyrics so it's often best if I don't know them. It's different for the artist, but I still can't be certain that Jungkook bothered finding out the translation to Jack's parts although he's the type to. Maybe he was so busy he didn't bother? Maybe he recorded his parts and only gave his blessing to the final version which included Jack's verses, without approving the lyrics beforehand. He doesn't seem the type to control what other people write in their own verses. Maybe he was too busy to translate the lyrics and only did it later? All seem to be possible options. The fact that Jungkook had to be coached to do the right facial expressions and gestures for his TikTok with Jack made it seem like he wasn't sure at all what the lyrics meant - at least then. It also makes me confident that he doesn't know what "rain, rain, rain" or "champagne, confetti" really mean. I think Jungkook cares more about melody and the vibe than lyrics.

Anyway, I don't think the industry is using him. He's not a victim anymore than anyone else. He's making his own choices, as much as someone in the industry can. Of course Big Hit loves the choices he's making because he's doing so well commercially, but I think he's made it clear that he loves what he's been doing. And if he's letting other people make choices for him, the blame is on him too, because he's in a position where he can say no.

I also want to hear Jungkook on his own, but, unless he's truly being pressured into only doing collabs for whatever reason, these are the choices he's making.

Thanks for the ask!

#ask #bts #jungkook #text #thanks for the ask

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5sosfanfictioncatalogue · 4 months ago

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Fic Titles W/ Their Names Masterlist

5 Seconds of Naughty (ao3) - sir_red luke/ashton, michael/calum E, 5k

Summary: Shameless smut about 5SOS.

5 Times Luke Though He Got Away With Keeping A Secret From The Boys and the 1 Time He Realized They Knew The Whole Time (ao3) - ProducedbyMGC N/R

Summary: 5 times Luke thought he got away with keeping a pretty big secret from the boys and the 1 time he realized maybe he's shit at keeping secrets.

Ash is on the floor (ao3) - tinyglitterrose ot4 M, 4k

Summary: “Are you hard?”, Luke asked bluntly and immediately he had the attention of three australians.

Play it cool, just play if off, Ashton thought to himself, as if he was not panicking right now.

“No? What the fuck, Luke?”, he tried to sound arrogant and even rolled his eyes at the blonde, but the other man wasn’t having it.

“No, no, you’re hard, I saw that”, then he giggled, “You have a boner, Ashy, I saw it”

Ashton shook his head violently, but Calum interrupted him before he could object again: “Do you really?”

— basically an Ashton centered foursome with plot.

Ashton Enchanted (ao3) - boomercal calum/ashton N/R, 46k

Summary: Ashton was given a special ‘gift’ when he was only a few days old, the 'gift’ of obedience. He has never been in love, never had friends and is content to keep it that way until a friendly girl in his class decides she wants to be his friend. Then Ashton has to come to terms with trusting those around him, maintaining his first friendships and managing his first real crush.

calum's song. (ao3) - badomensbaby luke/calum T, 6k

Summary: or, the five times luke thinks about telling calum he's in love with him, plus the one time he finally does.

Five Things Luke Hemmings Thinks About (ao3) - zaynshoran (oneswhonever) Luke/Calum, past Luke/Ashton M, 833

Summary: What Luke thinks about after Ashton’s death

How to make an idiot out of yourself, by Ashton Irwin. (ao3) - cuddlingluke luke/ashton T, 2k

Summary: the one where ashton mistakes his boss' son for a staff guy and makes him help him but luke doesn't mind

Life-Size Luke (ao3) - plushyluke luke/ashton E, 15k

Summary: ashton is a sex store employee when the new adult, collector dolls hit the shelves. he's had enough of these "lukey dolls," when one night everything changes, and his life becomes lukalicious.

lu and mike (tt) (ao3) - coolbabyblue michael/luke, calum/ofc T, 426k

Summary: The story in which Luke is an overly aggressive teen who just can’t seem to catch a break in life and Michael just wants to show him that he deserves the world and more.

Luke Hugged Him Back Just As Tightly And Heard Michael Whisper ‘Friends’. (ao3) - destiel_lemmings E, 28k

Summary: Luke knew that this was going to be weird. He new roommate/ex-kitten were now even more indulged in Luke’s mind. The only problem was that his roommate was not only attractive but he knew Luke like the back of his hand, and Luke had just met the boy.

Or this is a continuation of ‘With A Meow And A Belly Rub Luke Knew He Was In Love With The Ball Of Fur.’ And Michael knows all of Luke’s quirks but Luke is just getting to know the cute boy that was once his kitten. This is the journey through their friendship and maybe even relationship?

Lukey Boy - @daydadahlias (cornflowerblue (daydadahlias)) T, 4k

Summary: Ashton brings Luke to Craft Club.

Magic Mike (ao3) - im_just_a_sucker_for_bromance michael/everyone E, 3k

Summary: Ashton Irwin is turning 21 and wanted a grand party. To his surprise, his idea of ‘Grand Party’ does not coincide with what his friends think a 'Grand Party’ means. His night may turn out to be better than he had imagine.

Michael’s Dirty Diary (ao3) - im_just_a_sucker_for_bromance michael/luke E, 32k

Summary: Why did Luke find somebody’s diary? Why did he even want to read it when he knew he should not? The things he was reading were shocking but he could not help but read more, specially since he was involved. Who was that Michael anyway? Luke had to find out.

michael wants another slice - @sup3rbloom (haveufoundwhaturlookingfor) michael/luke T, 3k

Summary: Luke is Ashton's nerdy next door neighbor, and he also just happened to get a job as a pizza delivery boy. Michael crushes on him as soon as he meets him. Cue the endless teasing from Ashton and Calum. And Luke helps Michael get a job.

Mikey’s kink (ao3) - Directioner_Jcats_5sosfam michael/luke E, 4k

Summary: Basically, Michaels want’s to try a few kinks, and Luke want to help.

The 5 Times Calum Ran Into a Nameless Guy at a Bar, and The One Time He Wasn’t So Nameless (ao3) - awfuldaycupcake calum/ashton N/R, 7k

Summary: The one where Calum keeps seeing Ashton in bars, but doesn’t even know his name

#5sosfanfictioncatalogue #5sos fanfic #masterlists #5sosnames #5sosnames masterlist #misc

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tenaciouschronicler · 5 months ago

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June 16 2024 2009

For the last time, this boy's name is John!!!

Whoever >VOICE is has done nothing this update but make me and Narrator annoyed. At least theyve finally taken the hint and use our boys name for the majority of the following commands. Theyve also got a better grasp of what commands will yield results in moving plot forward.

Firstly we get to talk with Rose.

TT: I've been watching you scramble through the house like a lunatic.

Which is great news! We have confirmed there is still a connection between them and John at least had someone to talk to.

EB: oh man, sorry, i was looking around for my dad and i can't find him anywhere!

EB: have you seen him?

TT: No. I'm sure he'll turn up.

I wonder if Rose was too preoccupied with worry for John to be paying attention to Dad. Since she is able to place objects anywhere in the house it's obvious she can view everything. She may be limited to only seeing one room at a time however.

But now for some pressing questions.

EB: yeah, like where am i??

TT: I don't know that either. But I've determined your neighborhood was destroyed by the meteor. Wherever you were transported, it saved you from the impact.

TT: I've been reading reports in the news. Over the last few days, there have been many smaller meteor collisions with people's homes around the world.

TT: And they seem to be getting bigger. Yours was the biggest they've identified so far.

Ok so John is Not Here, meaning Earth, and all those meteors we had seen we in fact Not for John. I guess each SBURB player gets a meteor assigned to their destruction. I wonder if this phenomena has been occurring since SBURBs launch. Did meteorologists and astronomers alike come up with theories and reports that have only recently been made public? Rose doesnt seem to have any gunning for her place so its safe to assume only triggering the countdown would cause a meteor strike. Also how big is 'neighborhood'? Is it the block? The road? This picture? In the flash we zoom out to more houses. Is it all of those??

In an effort to gain normalacy we get this cute interaction.

EB: wait, rose! one thing...

TT: What?

EB: you never even wished me a happy birthday!

EB: um... hello?

TT: I was working on something to send you, but I was running late with it.

TT: I didn't want you to think I believed meager well wishes alone would suffice for the occasion.

TT: That said, happy birthday, John.

EB: haha, oh jeez, that is silly!

EB: anyway, thanks!

I really worry for John right now. This has all gotta be really stressful and hes just grabbing at straws.

What follows is a frustrating sequence to grab the PDA wherein >VOICE becomes more and more punchable!

[John makes his way to the balcony per your awkwardly-worded request.]

Looks like more one-sided banter between these two is gonna be happening in the foreseeable future...

<JOHN. RECYCLE THE GRIST AS WAS DICTATED BY YOUR COHORT.>

[John cannot do anything with the GRIST as of this moment! That is up to the Sburb player.]

[Yes, that will suffice.]

My guess is the Player is supposed to supply the Server with GRIST somehow so that the Server can then make the appropriate actions of building, moving, ect. Its still unclear how thats supposed to be achieved.

Luckily not all the grist was used in redecorating. Upon deleting the GENERIC OBJECTS [6 units of BUILD GRIST are restored to your GRIST CACHE]. Looking back at page 193 each cube was worth 2 GRIST so deleting all 3 gave us the total of 6. For this reason Im still holding that moving the CRUXTRUDER should be cost free. Its apparent theres no loss in conversion.

Rose uses these grist to build a walkway from the balcony to nearly above the PDA.

JOHN RUN ACROSS PRECARIOUS PLATFORM SWIFTLY.

excuse me?

BOY I SAID MAKE HASTE ON THE NARROW CATWALK!

Excuse me!!! Sir!!! Who are you to talk that way to John!!! How dare you make the boy frown!!!

John is very nervous about the idea, and the strident tone of your commands is starting to make him a little upset!

Exactly! Thank you!

And then the audacity to start your next command with <FINE.>! The only one with common sense here is the narrator (　｀ー´)

At least Rose can get the PDA to John...

You grab the PDA, launching one of the HARLEQUIN FIGURINES into the night.

You can kiss that one goodbye.

... with... minimal casualties...

#i am john; he is me #were it not for wanting to make these posts readable everyrhing would be lowercase #he does better than me is using apostrophies though :P #homestuck #homestuck replay #hsrp liveblog #ooc: not sure if i stated this anywhere but my blog operates on realtime for updates #ooc: i should probably put that in my pinned post #hsrp lore #chrono

0 notes

enmi-land · 7 months ago

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✶ ONE OF THE GIRLS

◜ ────𝗂𝖿 𝗆𝗂𝗅𝖺 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖻𝗈𝗒𝗌 𝗇𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖿𝖾𝗌𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗅𝗂𝖾𝗋.

💭 poly엔하이픈 ☓ f!addedmember (ft.m!actor)┊ ‘23ᴬᵁ . . . (9300𝔀𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀) ౨ৎ requested⦂en- seeing mila with someone who isn’t them❜ ╱ 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝓊𝓇𝑒 ?! · sexual themes (non-explicit), alcohol, unhealthy coping mechanisms, miscommunication & misunderstandings 。。星RETURN☆𝓗OME

꒰ NOTE ✦ i'm sorry for the rushed ending but it was difficult to end it in a way that wasn't yknow sad and it was getting too long TT [ extra. bonus scene for hwang sejun found here ]

MILA WAS SEVENTEEN WHEN SHE FIRST FELL IN LOVE. She was too young to know what it was, too inexperienced to do anything about it, but if there was anything she was certain of, it was that the warmth that filled her chest and the fluttering of her heart when she so much as looked at them could never be anything less than pure longing.

She was twenty when she finally realised she already knew what love was. And that was a problem. Because, you see, falling in love was normal; falling in love with seven men at the same time, however, was anything but.

Why do you do this to yourself? She thought miserably as she opened yet another compilation full of analysis on the interactions between her and her members – or rather, between her and the boys, specifically.

She recognised the clip playing on her phone. It was during an EN-O’Clock episode and featured the group laughing and having fun together as they played games arranged by the directors. It would seem like a harmless and wholesome moment shared by the group, if it weren’t for the fact that upon slowing it down and zooming in, one would be able to spot the exact moment where Heeseung raised his hand to pat the top of her head – only for his smile to suddenly dropped as he retreated, covering up his momentary slip-up by reaching to fix the hair of Riki who stood on Mila’s other side.

Then there was the painfully awkward moment during a livestream, where Mila was in the middle of Jake and Jay, laughing at something that Sunoo said. Jake was reading comments – trying to, anyway – when he suddenly froze, as if caught in the trance.

He stared at his phone in silence, missing the question that Kiara had asked the members. It was at that moment when Mila turned to look at him, silently questioning his distracted state, her leg brushing against his in the process. But the moment she did so, Jake flinched, as if caught doing something he shouldn’t have. He immediately shut his phone off, before moving his legs closer together so that their thighs were no longer touching.

It hurt. It hurt seeing just how hesitant they were around her, how cautious they were to avoid anything that could be read as intimate. Even more so when it got to the point where fans were taking notice of how distant they were compared to when they showered her with attention and affection during the early days of their career.

Mila shut her phone down, slamming it down next to her empty glass. “I’ll have one more,” she called out to the bartender across the bar, watching as he filled her glass to the top. In the dim lighting of the private bar, hidden away from the public eye, Mila closed her eyes and tilted her head back, letting the burn of the alcohol as it trickled down her throat.

She hated vodka, but it was the only thing strong enough to force down the bitterness of her lingering regrets. Mila slammed the empty glass back down onto the bench. I should have never said anything.

“You had something to tell me?”

Kiara had pulled Mila aside to their shared bedroom, a look of concern on the older woman’s face as she took in the fidgety gaze of Mila who stood before her. She only ever fiddled with her sleeves like that when she was nervous. By now, Kiara could read her like a book — and that made Mila feel both seen and exposed.

Mila swallowed nervously. She knew she could tell Kiara anything, and that the older female would never hold it against her. She played a role that Mila’s own mother had sometimes failed to do as she was growing up — the role of the confidant and counsel. Mila knew she could trust her with anything.

So why was she hesitating now?

Mila bit her lip. “I realised lately that I’ve been feeling… well I kind of have romantic feelings. But the thing is… “Well, my feelings aren’t really conventional. I’m scared that they’re going to make the others feel…”

Uncomfortable. Bothered. Disgusted.

“Well, okay, that’s fine. We can talk through it. You said that you like someone?” Kiara made a gesture with her hands. “That’s fine. I know that you don’t have much experience in this stuff, but that’s why I tell you I’m here if you need an ear. So what’s wrong?”

Mila took in a deep breath. “Well that’s just the thing— it’s not a ‘someone… it’s ‘someones,’ as in plural.”

Kiara was stunned into silence, her lips parting into a soundless gasp.

Mila lowered her head. “I like— Actually… ‘love’ might be the better word for it; I somehow fell in love. And I know it’s… weird— but I can’t help it. No matter what I do, whenever I try and focus on just one of them at a time, it’s like the others find a way to make themselves known.”

“All of them?”

It didn’t take long for Kiara to guess who had stolen Mila’s heart. For three years she had noticed a dynamic growing between Mila and the boys that differed from that between the seven of them and Kiara. But she never could have expected this outcome. (And yet, at the same time, it all made sense.)

Mila nodded. “Eung… I love them all…”

Kiara opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted by the sound of something by the door that sounded like something being knocked over and hitting the floor. The two women exchanged glances at each other, before the elder hurriedly rushed to the door. Kiara threw it open. There, standing on the other side, were the men in question… all seven of them.

And judging by the looks on their faces, they had heard everything.

“Not a good night tonight?”

Mila raised her head from the cool surface of the bar, eyes lifting towards a familiar face. His handsome features were done justice by the sensual lighting of the bar, the shadows casted in such a way that his sharp contours of his face became all the more prominent. The sultry smile on his lips would have had the knees of any woman buckling under their weight. His silk black shirt was unbuttoned to give a sneak peek of his toned chest, tantalising like the honey which the colour of his skin resembled.

Mila sighed as she straightened in her seat. She moved her handbag from the chair next to her, wordlessly allowing the man to take a seat on it. “Was it that obvious?”

He chuckled, shaking his head in fond exasperation. He hummed deeply. Long and slender fingers all too familiar to Mila reached out to her, brushing strands from her face. She felt the cool touch of silver rings around his fingers as his hand cupped her cheek, raising her head to look him in the eye.

“You can’t hide anything in those pretty eyes of yours, doll,” he replied. He smirked as his thumb brushed against her lip. “I know you better than anyone here.”

And wasn’t that the truth?

It was difficult to believe that there could be someone out there who knew so much about her within the span of two months. Among her own group members, she struggled to open up to them about basic feelings until a year after their debut — even those such as Sunghoon, Heeseung and Jay, who she knew years before I-Land. Normally, she was a lot more guarded around strangers.

But Hwang Sejun was no ordinary stranger.

Mila didn’t mean to seek him out, to cross the line with him. But the night they met was the same night Mila had her heart broken — and just like now, she was looking for a way to forget. That was why she didn’t flinch, didn’t pull away when his lips came down to hers in a teasing brush of a kiss.

Mila lowered her head from where she sat on the couch, surrounded by her group members.

“Is it true?” Jay whispered almost inaudibly as he sat on a chair at the kitchen table, watching the young woman with an unreadable look in his eyes. “What you said to Noona not long ago… Did you really mean it?”

Mila nodded. Heeseung sighed as he clasped his hands together, the dim lighting of the living room casting a show over his troubled expression.

And why wouldn’t he be? Mila didn’t know what he was thinking, but if the girl she had practically treated as a younger sister all these years took every act of kindness to be something more than platonic and even go as far as to profess her love for them, her world would tilt off axis too. Not to mention the fact that his six other members—friends—were on the list, too.

It was stupid of Mila to hope that there may be a chance for her to get a happy ending, with not one, but seven men. Maybe, a dark part of her whispered, maybe those ‘haters’ of hers were right after all. She could see the label plastering itself across her forehead: ‘Whore.’ In capital red letters.

“This isn’t something that will change our dynamic, will it?” their leader asked, after a painfully long silence. “It’s too sudden… I think we need to take a break to think for ourselves before we move forward with anything.”

It was the logical thing to do. Mila agreed. So did the others. But it felt like she was struggling more than they would—because, really, she cared more for them than they ever would. And as she found herself vsitting alone in the Hybe building, refusing to step foot before any of her members out of sheer embarrassment, that was when he found her.

The first time Mila met him, Sejun had crouched down in front of her, tilting his head at her puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

“Not a good night tonight?”

Mila could feel the way Sejun’s eyes trailed the column of her throat, felt the way his long fingers brushed against the skin as if wanting to wrap them around her throat like he had done however many nights ago. Mila looked up at him, eyes glassy and lips parted.

“What are you going to do about it?” she asked quietly, leaning towards him.

Sejun let out a breathy chuckle. “I’ll make it better.”

And he would. He always did.

Sejun was no good for her. He went through women almost as fast as he smoked cigarettes; he partied hard, and fucked even harder. He couldn’t be vulnerable, couldn’t be gentle, couldn’t love Mila the way wanted to be loved… He was exactly the type of man she was always warned to stay away from.

But he was here. And even if it wasn’t any coincidence that he was always here when she wanted to be held, she fell into his arms anyway.

Sejun moved his hand to the back of her neck, pressing his lips against her hairline in a soft kiss. “Come on, princess,” he mumbled against her skin, and Mila tried not to think of the fact that Sunghoon used to call her the exact same thing. “Let’s get you out of here.”

Mila didn’t protest, following the older man as he led her by the wrist.

(As the saying went: if you want to get over someone, get under someone else.)

“Won’t your members be worried if you’re out this late?” Sejun tilted his head as he sat down next to the crying girl. “It’s not exactly safe for a pretty girl like you to be alone. There could be bad men around who will want to take advantage of you.”

Mila sniffled, hugging her knees closer to her chest. She looked like a corner animal, hiding away from a prowling tiger, eyes looking warily at the man beside her. She knew of him—how could she not? He was the man every woman wanted to be with, and every man wanted to be. But she had only encountered him once before. She was walking around with Heeseung in the Hybe building when they bumped into Sejun, the older man greeting Heeseung familiarly.

‘Ah, Heeseung-ah, long time no see!’ he said with a smirk, crossing his arms over his chest. ‘Yah… Look at you, all grown up. Last time I saw you, was…. What? Before I-Land? You’ve gotten tall!’

Heeseung bowed to him and forced a smile. ‘Thank you, sunbae. It’s nice to see you,’

‘Aye, what’s with that tone? You should just call me hyung, like you used to.’ Sejun chuckled and clapped the younger man on the shoulder, eyes glinting with amusement when the younger eyed the hand with an unreadable look. But then Sejun’s eyes drifted over to Mila, who hid behind Heeseung, fingers grasping at his sleeve, and wide doe eyes peering over his shoulders curiously. ‘Oh– this must be your dongsaeng, right? Mila? I hear a lot about you.’ He leaned down to Mila’s height and smiled. ‘You’re even cuter in real life… like a bunny.’

Heeseung suddenly stiffened up, before stepping in front of Mila protectively, a stony look on his face. ‘Sorry, sunbae, but we have somewhere to be. Hope you have a good day.’ Heeseung gave a half-hearted nod of his head before quickly ushering Mila way with an arm around her shoulder. When they were out of earshot, he leaned down to whisper into her ear, ‘Be careful of him,’ he had told her. ‘If he comes up to you when you’re alone, let me or the others know, okay?’

Mila looked over her shoulder towards the actor one more time, to see him watching them leave, a sly smile on his face, his hands in the pockets of his pants. He shot her a wink, and Mila hastily looked away. As the good dongsaeng she was, eager to please, she had nodded obediently, not even questioning Heeseung’s warnings. It was just him being protective, she concluded. And she didn’t have any plans of disobeying him in the past.

But… he wasn’t here right now, was he? And she didn’t think she wanted to call him after what happened earlier tonight.

“What about you?” Mila asked. “Are you one of those bad men you mentioned?”

Sejun let out a hearty laugh, not offended in the slightest from Mila’s accusation. “Is that what your ‘Heeseungie-oppa’ told you?”

Mila almost shook her head, almost admitted that, no, he hadn’t told her anything of the sort—hadn’t even mentioned him ever since they first bumped into each other. But she didn’t get the chance before Sejun was leaning down so his face was only a few centimetres away from hers. A wolfish smile crossed his face.

“That’s right. So you should be careful, little bunny. Or else, I might gobble you up.’

Sejun playfully gnashed his teeth in a biting motion, causing Mila to blink at him dumbfoundedly. Seeing her expression, he laughed. And all of a sudden, Mila wasn’t so sad anymore. She was curious, instead. She wanted to know more about this man who she had been told to stay away from.

There was no need to fear playing with fire when she was already burnt.

Ignoring his feelings was the hardest thing that Sunoo could ever be asked to do. He was an idol, playing a part was what they did. But it was difficult to keep up the act when he had to watch the woman he loved grow further and further away.

“You look nice.”

Sunoo snapped out of his thoughts to see Riki standing against the doorframe to the bathroom, his arms across his chest. As he walked closer, he realised why. The younger male was watching as Mila applied makeup in the mirror, wearing her favourite black and white dress from Dior with a pearl choker. She smiled at Riki through the reflection, a soft thank you escaping her glossy lips.

“What’s the occasion?” Riki tilted his head, long locks falling over his forehead before he pushed them back. “Are you going out?”

Mila hummed. “Just to see a friend.”

“He’s right. You look pretty.” Mila smiled. Sunoo looked her up and down, foxy eyes gleaming with interest. “But you usually don’t go anywhere fancy with the girls…”

Mila and her friends were the type to enjoy cute cafes and shopping dates at the mall, just anything that gave them a sense of normalcy. They were too carefree to be interested in anything to do with high society or flaunting wealth, yet Mila stood here looking ready to walk the red carpet.

“It’s a different friend,” Mila replied. “We’re meeting at the company and then going to dinner at a new Italian restaurant.”

“Oh.” Sunoo nodded. “Do we know them?”

Mila cleared her throat. “Um, well, kind of? You know of them, but you haven’t met…”

Sunoo and Riki nodded in understanding. So it was another idol, then? Shrugging his shoulders, Riki leaned off from the doorframe, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. “Are you done yet? I wanted to go for a walk, so I’ll drop you off along the way.”

“Ooh, I’ll come too!” Sunoo said. “I need to go by the convenience store anyway.”

Mila blinked. “You don’t have to.’

Sunoo frowned. It wasn’t like Mila said that she didn’t want them to go with her, but he couldn’t help but feel a sense of nostalgia. He remembered when they first debuted, and the three of them had formed a bond stronger than steel. They were the golden trio, the three msuketeers; the sun, stars, and moon…

That was why it was so easy to nice that the three of them had drifted apart. They used to watch and mock popular dramas together and hide under the blankets of Mila’s bed while hiding snacks that they brought without the manager’s permission. But now it was like a wall was between them, one that Sunoo and Riki couldn’t climb, because Mila had refused to even give them a ladder.

And what was worse was that Sunoo couldn’t even complain about it. Because he was part of the reason it happened.

Jay paced in the living room, where the seven male members had gathered following the events of Mila’s unwilling confession. They sat there in silence, unable to say anything after they had rejected her, and she left the dorms in need of space.

“So are we just going to ignore what happened?” Riki asked. “Mila just admitted that she liked all of us. Doesn’t that mean anything?”

Heeseung sighed. “Riki-yah, not now please.”

“Then when?” Sunoo crossed his arms over his chest. “Isn’t now the perfect time?”

Sunoo couldn’t remember the first time he realised his feelings for Mila. It just felt so natural, that it didn’t even strike him as a surprise. And somehow, the same feeling applied when he learnt that his other members felt the same way towards her.

It felt like Mila was the only one who didn’t realise the true extent of their feelings for her. The way they would do anything and everything in the world if he asked, not because she was their precious co-member, or because they felt obligated by duty to coddle her since she was the youngest female of the group, but because they loved her wholeheartedly and wanted nothing more than to the the ones to cherish and protect her.

But the love that they had for each other was strong as well. They were friends, who had survived through the highs and lows of I-land together and continue to grow closer after they debuted. They weren’t the type to fall into competition or conflict with each other if they knew it would hurt the other, whether it was for Mila or anyone else.

They were willing to put aside all their feelings for the sake of the group. They were willing to hold their own remorse if the day ever came where Mila would develop feelings for one of them. But they never would have expected this outcome.

“It was too sudden,” Jungwon said grimly. “We never planned this, and it wouldn’t be good to jump into something without being sure.”

“What would we even do?” Sunghoon asked. “Even though she feels the same way, what happens next? We can’t all date her.”

Jake licked his lips in thought. “Can’t we? It’s not like it’s not a new thing. If we’re okay with it, it can’t be considered cheating. So why not give it a shot?”

“You mean a polyamorous relationship?” Jay took a seat next to Sunghoon, who bit the inside of his cheek at the thought. “No shame or whatever, I know it’s something that exists…. But there’s seven of us. And I know some of us aren’t really the type to ‘share.’”

Jay didn’t mention it, but he himself was included. He knew Sunghoon and Jungwon were as well. They were too jealous, too possessive to even entertain the thought. Even now, fans would pick up all the instances where the three of them would grow tense whenever one of their own members got too close and comfortable with Mila—much less any male idol that wasn’t part of the group.

If that was how they were now, they couldn’t even imagine how they would make Jake’s suggestion work.

“No,” Heeseung refused strongly. He would do anything just to be able to call Mila his. But the risk involved with this was too right. “If we decide after getting together that it’s not going to work, we’d just hurt Mila by giving her hopes and crushing them again. We can’t.”

Sunoo laughed humorlessly. “I’m not sure if you noticed, hyung, but she is already hurt as it is.”

Heeseung froze, his posture rigid.

The room was silent.

There was nothing they wanted more than to be able for in out of here and comfort her, because after what happened tonight, they had already broken a promise that they had made to the closer thing she had to an older brother in her life— her older cousin, who they met once when he flew over from China as soon as the borders opened. The one who had been the only strong male figure in her life after her parents divorced and her grandfather passed away.

‘I’ve seen how you look at her,’ he had said. ‘And to be honest, I don’t know what to feel about it… But I can tell you really care about her. So I’m trusting her to you. I won’t give you the shovel talk or anything, because she’s old enough to make her own decisions. Just, whatever happens… Don’t make her cry.’

“This is for the best,” Heeseung said, clenching his fist. “This way, no one gets hurt worse than they already are.”

Heeseung was wrong, Riki thought as he stood in the company lobby with Sunoo and Mila. Because after finding out the reason Mila had been so reluctant to let him and Sunoo accompany her, there was nothing that hurt more than this.

They were three steps into the lobby of the company, before Mila was turning to them with a smile. “Well, there is my stop. You guys can head off now and do what you need to do. My friend should be here soon.”

Riki frowned. “We should at least wait with you until they’re here.”

“It’s not good to be alone, even if it’s in the company building,” Sunoo agreed. “There’s still weird people who can get in here and go after you when you don’t expect it.”

Mila opened her mouth to protest. But before she could, someone else cut in before her. “They’re right, you know.”

Mila froze at the voice. Riki and Sunoo looked confused at the new arrival, but bowed in respect for their senior. “Hello, sunbaenim.”

Riki recognised his face from a few dramas that he had watched with Mila and Sunoo, but this was the first time seeing him in real life.

Hwang Sejun laughed, putting his hands into the pockets of his pants, his Bulgari watch flashing under the light of the lobby. “No need to be formal. Any friend of Mila’s is a friend of mine.”

Riki and Sunoo turned to Mila, the latter mouthing to her in disbelief. ‘You friend is Hwang Sejun?’

“It’s finally nice to meet you,” Sejun said with a charming grin. “Mila’s told me all about you.”

Mila frowned, nudging Sejun in the ribs. The things she told him about her members were all in drunk rambles, where she spilled her heart to the older man about her hopeless feelings. To his credit, he hadn’t shamed her in the slightest, instead comforting her by mentioning he too had been in a similar position once. (She doubted it was the same type of ‘love’ Mila felt, but she gave him the benefit of the doubt—just as she always did, for the sole fact that he was willing to help her in the only way he knew how.)

“Did she?” Sunoo asked, narrowing his eyes as Sejun’s hand found its way onto Mila’s waist. “She never mentioned anything about you, though.”

“Aww, didn’t you mention me to your members, doll? But we have such a special relationship.”

Mila swatted the man’s hand as he attempted to pinch her cheek. “Don’t say that. They’ll misunderstand.”

Riki bit the inside of his cheek, a pit forming in his gut at the tone and the nickname that Sejun used. He kept his glare on the older male, subconsciously standing to his full height. The two of them were eye to eye. But while Riki was tense, Sejun was relaxed, not the slightest bit intimidated by the younger male.

“What relationship?” Riki asked.

Sejun laughed. “I think Mila should be the one to tell you. Isn’t that right, baby?”

Sunoo took a sharp breath at the endearment, and Mila instantly panicked.

“Don’t listen to him, he’s just joking around. We’re just friends, right, oppa?” Mila forced a smile as she looked at her members. Riki and Sunoo weren’t ready to finish the conversation, but Mila seemed like she wanted nothing more than to end it. So she was grabbing Sejun’s arm in hers (her members’ eyes flickered to the way she held it, like she would usually—or rather, used to—hold theirs) before dragging him away. “I’ll see you later, okay?”

“Wait,” Riki tried to go after the two, but was held back by Sunoo.

“Don’t,” Sunoo said. But his eyes narrowed as he watched Mila drag the man away, not missing the way he quickly leant down to kiss her on the cheek when they turned the corner.

Right, Riki thought, as he watched them with clenched fists.

He wasn’t her boyfriend, and he wasn’t even her senior. He was just another friend to her, who had no right to feel jealous—because he had a chance and missed it.

Mila froze at the door of the dorms, her hand lingering on the door knob. What did she even say? She didn’t think she could be any more humiliated tonight, but coming back to the dorms after rushing out in tears was the second most embarrassing token that could have happened.

She could only hope that the others weren’t still awake yet. But that hope immediately dwindled as soon as the door opened, revealing Heeseung on the other side.

Mila should have known he would wait up for her. But she wished he hadn’t, because it only reminded her of why he loved him so much.

“You’re back?” Heeseung said, his voice fragile.

Mila simply hung her head and brushed past the older man as he held the door open, not wanting to let him see the tear streaks on her face. She clenched her fists, pulling on her sleeve as she shuffled awkwardly into the silent dorms.

“Everyone else is asleep,” Heeseung said.

“Okay.” Mila sniffled. “I’ll head to bed now.”

“Wait.”

Mila froze at the sound of Heeseung’s voice.

“About tonight…” Heeseung took a step forward, but then stopped, as if he were scared of getting too close. At that moment, all Mila could think about was if she just ruined her friendship with her members because she couldn’t keep her feelings to herself.

Heeseung clenched his hand into his fist when Mila turned to face him. All he wanted to do was to work up to her and bring her to his chest. To tell her how much he loved her, to let her know he wanted nothing more than to be hers. But he couldn’t.

“Sorry,” Mila whispered, her eyes stinging with unshed tears. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not that—” Heesejng had to physically hold himself back from running to her, to tell her that hearing her feelings for him made him the happiest man alive. “It’s just… we can’t love you the way you deserve.”

They weren’t prepared to face the challenges of loving her together.

Mila nodded. “I understand. And I—I really am sorry… I—” Mila let out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry. I’ll just go to bed now. Good night.”

Heeseung felt his heart shatter as Mila turned and walked away from him, shutting herself in her room. The sound of Kiara’s voice was barely heard from the room, and Heeseung was grateful that she was there to comfort Mila when he couldn’t.

In the other rooms, where the five remaining members were still awake, wide awake as they listened to Mila's muffled sobs through the silence of their once vibrant home.

Sunoo sniffled, unable to sleep when his other half was hurting.

“It shouldn’t have to be this way,” he said.

But what else could they do?

“You’re late.”

Mila almost jumped out of her skin when she walked into the Enhypen dorms at four o’clock in the morning, to see one Park Jongseong sitting on the couch, his arms folded across his chest and his eyes red from what Mila would assume was lack of sleep. She paused in the middle of taking off her shoes, looking like a child who got caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

Mila should have expected that this would happen. Jay was always the first one to wake up in the morning aside from Kiara; and it was just her rotten luck that he got up earlier than usual. Or maybe, not a coincidence at all. (She briefly wondered if Sunoo and Riki had reported her meeting with Sejun, after all, and he had been waiting for her to get home from her outing, like the overprotective member he was.)

There was a moment of silence where the two of them continued to stare at each other, a silent question lingering in the air. Where were you?

“I was out with a friend.”

“Until two in the morning?” Jay asked tensely.

Mila pursed her lips. There really was no way she could explain this in a way that would calm the older man’s temper. He was one of the most patient with Mila, and rarely ever raised his voice at her. So people would be surprised to hear that he was second to Kiara when it came to scolding her, like he was now.

(She tried to push down the feeling in her gut that always appeared whenever he was upset with her, because she wanted nothing more than to be the reason he smiled instead.)

“Do you have any idea how worried we were when we saw that you weren’t here?” he continued. “And that you weren’t answering your calls?”

Shit. Mila hadn’t even thought to check her phone, since she had gotten used to being gone unnoticed. She reached for it, opening it to see a number of missed calls from several familiar contacts. And it was then when she realised what Jay said. She furrowed her brows. We?

At that moment, Jungwon walked out of the bathroom, causing Mila to hold her breath. He was wearing his hood over his head and didn’t say anything as he walked towards where she and Jay were. But the look on his face spoke volumes. “I was the one who woke up Jay-hyung,” he said, biting the inside of his cheeks. “I woke up in the middle of the night to get a drink and noticed your light was still on inside your room. So I went to see if you were okay… but then I noticed you weren’t there.”

Mila bit her lip. She had always been so careful, but one mistake was all it took to get caught. “That’s right. Okay. I left without saying anything, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you and got you worried. But I just wanted to get out of the dorms for a while.”

“And you couldn’t do that during the day?” Jungwon asked.

“Kiara-unnie goes out during the night as well,” Mila replied. “I don’t see why this is different.”

“Kiara-noona is different because at least we know she’s with people who will take care of her if anything happens. But we don’t know where you were, or who you were with.” Mila opened her mouth to speak, but Jay cut her off. “And don’t use one of your friends as an excuse. We called them too. None of them knew where you were either.”

“Well… I have plenty of friends you don’t know about.” Mila straightened her stance. “And I trust him, so there is no reason for you to worry. Thanks for looking out for me, really, but I’m a grown woman, I don’t need you to do that anymore.”

Jay and Jungwon had flinched slightly, as if those words in particular struck a chord within them. And maybe it did, because Mila had meant to say, ‘I don’t need your overprotectiveness,’ it was dangerously close to sounding like, ‘I don’t need you.’

And she didn’t at the time how much that hurt for them to hear.

Jay stood from his seat as Mila tried to walk away, posture stiff. “Wait—‘him?’”

Mila almost cursed for having accidentally let that slip, only to rebuke her own thoughts. Why did it matter, if she were with a man or a woman, or how long they spent out together?

“That’s right.”

“You can’t just say that and expect us to be okay,” Jay muttered quietly.

“And why not? What’s it to you, if I was with a man, a friend, or a lover?“

There was a sharp inhale from Jay at the last word. A small part of Mila hoped that he would tell her that she didn’t need to find someone else to fill the void left by him and the others. That he was more than happy to take his rightful place in her heart, and allow her to enter his. And she didn’t know, but he felt the same way.

Because I love you, he wanted to say. And I could love you just as much as he could and more.

But he didn’t say a word. He simply clenched his fists, his shoulders tense.

“That’s right. It doesn’t matter. It shouldn't matter. Because we’re friends, and nothing more.”

Mila wasn’t going to stay as the girl with the one sided love—she refused to. She wasn’t going to put everything on hold for a slight chance that the ones she loved might be able to love her back. If this was what it took to move on, then that was what she would do.

Mila started to walk away, but a hand on her wrist stopped her leaving.

She looked up at the owner. “Yang Jungwon—”

“Was it Hwang Sejun?”

Mila felt all the air in her lungs rush out at the sound of Jungwon’s voice. His dark eyes bore into her, and she suddenly was reminded of the fact that he was no longer the young lovesick puppy that would follow her around when they were trainees.

She looked at Jay, and didn’t see any traces of confusion. So Riki and Sunoo told the others about earlier today, after all.

“Right. Sunoo and Ni-Ki told Jungwon, and he told me. But the others still don’t know,” Jay said. “We thought we’d ask you first, to see if it was true.”

“Can he treat you better than we can?” Jungwon asked, snapping Mila out of her thoughts with the weight of his question.

Mila’s throat tightened. No, she wanted to say. No man on Earth could ever treat me better than you do. And no matter who came after me, I would still choose you. But she didn’t want to lay her heart bare to anyone again; she didn’t want to get hurt.

So she lied.

“Yes.” A flash of emotion reflected in Jungwon’s eyes. His fingers loosened their grasp, and Mila shook his hand off. “He can. So next time I’m gone, don’t worry about me. He’ll be able to take care of me just fine if anything happens.” She forced a smile. “And you can forget about what happened with my feelings. I know it put you in a difficult position…. So I promise to get rid of them.”

She didn’t stay to see their reaction, no matter how curious she was. In the end, she knew it was better this way: if they thought she had moved on, maybe they wouldn’t avoid her any more. Maybe, they could all go back to normal.

“Wait, Mila.”

Jay rushed after Mila as she walked towards the door of the dorms with the intention to leave. But something held him back. An invisible string tugging him backwards.

When Mila opened the door, Sejun was standing on the other side, holding up a familiar bag.

Mila froze. Jay and Jungwon were silent. Sejun looked between the three of them, before raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, sorry,” he said. “Did I interrupt something?”

There was once a time when Mila felt like there was no other place she could call home, except wherever it was her members were. But she would be blind not to notice that the home she had been building from the last few years wasn’t crumbling down.

When did she first start to feel so out of place in the one place she thought she truly belonged?

“Good job on today’s filming!”

After bowing to the staff and giving her appreciation for their hard work, Mila found herself standing on the sidelines as she watched her male members interact with the woman in the midst—someone who wasn’t her or Kiara.

They were in the middle of shooting the concept trailer for their new comeback, and rather than using one of the female members as an actress for Sooha, the company hired someone else instead. She was a petty model under the company label, the same age as Mila. And perhaps that was why it stung so much when she watched them fawn over her like they used to do to her.

“Do you need help?” Sunghoon asked.

He held a hand out to the actress as she needed to stand from the snowy blanket that she sunk into when she fell over. The girl smiled charmingly, taking his hand like a princess would do to her prince. It left a bitter taste in Mila’s mouth. Because she recalled when she used to be called their princess, instead.

The actress suddenly slipped, causing the others to act fast. They all held out their hand on reflex to stop her from hurting herself, with Jake’s leaning on her back to help her stabilise her balance.

“Woah,” he laughed, “be careful.”

Mila couldn’t remember the last time they were so carefree around her. It felt like they were constantly drawing a line—one so thick they couldn’t even smile at her before they stepped back.

But there she was, watching them laugh with another girl without a care in the world.

“Come on,” Kiara said, breaking her out of her thoughts. “The director wants us.”

Mila frowned. It took her too long to rip her eyes from the sight, but even when she did, she could still see their wide smiles like they were tattooed in her head—smiles no longer aimed towards her.

“What do you usually do when you’re sad?” Mila asked Sejun that night. “Or when something really shitfy happens to you at work?”

Sejun hummed thoughtfully. “I drink… or I fuck. One or the other—sometimes even both.”

Mila scoffed. But even so, she found herself looking at the older man with a glint of curiosity. “Does it work?”

Sejun shrugged. “Sometimes.”

Mila asked again. “Would it work for me?”

Jake hated waking up early in the morning. But if there was one thing he hated more, it was the sight of the stranger standing in the middle of the living room—a man who he had never met before, but who Mila was very familiar with.

“Who are you?” he asked.

Mila looked at him, and he felt his heart squeeze when she bit her lip and looked away, tugging at the stranger’s sleeve. It was just another reminder that he was no longer someone she looked to when she wanted to smile. A reminder that they no longer had those ‘friendly’ dates where he would take her out to dinner, and she would peck him on the cheek as thanks.

“He was just leaving.” Mila pulled on the man’s sleeve again. “Thanks for dropping off my bag. You can go now.”

Jake narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Why would he have her bag?

“Why so quick to make me leave? I haven’t even introduced myself yet.” The man smiled, and Jake had to admit he was good-looking—which was yet another reason why he felt a prick of envy, and a tiny bit of insecurity. “I’m Hwang Sejun, nice to meet you.”

The man held out a hand to shake Jake’s. For a second, he felt that this ‘Sejun’ looked incredibly familiar. And that was when it hit—he was an actor in one of the dramas Mila had shown him a preview of, back before they got into this weird state of limbo.

Jake took his hand. “I’m Jake.”

Sejun smirked. “I know.”

Mila’s eyes flickered to Sejun and sighed. “Really, now’s not a good time. It’s way too early, and I want to get some sleep.”

“Right.” Sejun smiled at Mila charmingly. “I kept you up pretty late last night, didn’t I?”

Jake’s hand subconsciously tightened around Sejun’s hand. What was that supposed to mean?

It wasn’t that Jake was innocent or naive. He had his fair share of girlfriends and kisses, and a few nights where he woke up hot and bothered. He also knew of the reputation that Sejun had. And it bothered him more than it should—-especially when he wasn’t even her boyfriend.

“Thanks for dropping off our Mila’s things, but it’s not a good time for us.” Jay sounded very calm, unlike what he was probably feeling inside. “Do you mind dropping by at another time?”

Or not at all, went unsaid.

“Ah, sorry. I just thought I should meet you guys first.” Sejun smirked at the way Jungwon bit the inside of his cheek. He pried his hand from Jake’s tightening grip, before shaking his hand nonchalantly. He faced Jungwon. “You’re the leader, right? Ah… but I should probably introduce myself to your oldest first. Where’s Heeseung?”

Mila glared, and Jake felt a tiny bit of satisfaction. “Heeseungie-oppa is asleep. Don’t bother him.”

Sejun didn’t get to speak when a new voice entered the conversation.

“Why do you want to know?” Sunghoon walked into the living room, arms crossed over his chest as he sized up the new face in their dorms. “And what are you doing inside our home?”

Riki and Sunoo—likely having heard the commotion—followed closely after Sunghoon. Jake noticed a light of recognition, and wondered if they knew what the relationships between Mila and Sejun was.

To his credit, Sejun didn’t seem at all intimidated by the five men around him. “Well, I figured I should get along with you guys, considering my relationship with ‘your’ Mila.”

‘Your Mila.’ It sounded like a taunt, and from the cocky tilt of his lips, Sejun definitely meant it as one. Jake would admit that it got to him, too, because it wasn’t true. Mila wasn’t his—wasn’t any of theirs—and neither were they hers.

And nothing scared him more than the fact that he could lose her forever.

The room was tense. Sunghoon squared his shoulders as he glared at the older. “What do you mean by that?” His eyes then fell on Mila, who looked like she would rather be anywhere but here.

“What's he to you?”

Mila looked annoyed, her usually gentle features fixed in a scowl. “None of your business.”

Sunghoon obviously didn’t like her answer, considering the way he tensed his jaw, fist clenching and unclenching in his nervous tick. But Mila couldn’t care less.

Who was he—who were they—to demand who Sejun was to her? Who were they to seem so affronted by the fact that she could possibly be in a relationship with another man? They made it clear already that they didn’t intend to return her feelings, and that even a friendship with her was hard to maintain with the way they avoided all contact with her like she had the plague.

Mila was getting sick of all this male ego and testosterone. Sejun didn’t help her with his smug expression and his arm over her shoulder.

“Ah,” he said. “Well, it looks like you have something to sort out between you… So I’m just going to go ahead and leave.” He smiled down at Mila. “See you later, okay, princess?”

Sunghoon glared as Sejun leaned down to peck her cheek. Mila rolled her eyes, shrugging off his arm from her shoulder. It was just like him to try and rile up the others for his own entertainment. And she would have given him a firm rebuke if it weren’t for the fact that she was upset with them too.

“We won’t see you out,” Sunoo said.

Sejun laughed. “Thought so.”

Mila didn’t wait for the door to shut before she was already marching to her room, ignoring the way Sunghoon followed hot on her heels until he slipped between her and the door, barring her entry.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Mila asked with a shaky voice.

Sunghoon could go on and on about what was wrong with him. It drove him crazy every day that he wasn’t able to hold her the way he wanted to, that he couldn’t wake up to his face as she lay in his arms; or that he wasn’t able to kiss her until both their lips were swollen, that he wasn’t able to whisper ‘I love you’s into her ears before they fell asleep at night…

The thought that someone else might be able to do those things–to shower her with affection and attention–was enough to send him over the brink of sanity. Loving her seemed to be the only thing that was right; but he still managed to mess that up because he couldn’t stand the fact that he wasn’t the only one in her heart.

He couldn’t say that, though. He couldn’t express everything he felt so simply. So all he could manage to say was, “Do you love him?”

Mila had enough. God, she hated that she was so emotional. But this was just too unfair.

It was fine that they didn’t love her; it was fine that they couldn’t accept her feelings for them. But why did they have to act so jealous? It frustrated her. Because it made her heart hope that there was a chance that they could feel the same way for her that she did.

But that couldn’t be true. It just couldn’t. Or they wouldn’t be here to begin with.

“You– seriously what is wrong with all of you…?” Mila took in a deep breath, before turning to the rest of the men, who were still in the living room. She let go. “No, I don’t love him. And no, he’s not my boyfriend.” Relief crossed their faces, but she wasn’t done with them yet. “He’s just someone I’ve been sleeping with whenever I feel alone or miserable, because I couldn’t get over my stupid feelings for you!”

Mila heard a small gasp, but she didn’t know who it was from. Her eyes were too blurry with tears to see.

“Do you have any idea how crappy it feels? All I want to do is forget about my feelings so that we can all go back to how we were—but all you do is give me mixed signals that mess with my head!”

Mila swallowed the lump in her throat.

“Why are you acting like it hurts all of a sudden if I’m with someone else? You have no idea what it’s like to love someone who doesn’t even look your way. You have no idea what I feel whenever you ignore me, but smile at other girls like everything is okay. And—and I’m sick of chasing after you like some lovesick idiot because I can’t move on because—”

Mila never got to finish what she was saying, because the next thing she knew, she was being spun around, and Sunghoon’s hands found their way onto her cheeks, before pressing his lips firmly against hers. Her eyes widened at the feeling of his desperate kiss, her ability to breathe complete stolen from her. But a swarm of butterflies erupted in her stomach, flying their way into the chambers of her chest, where they settled among her widely racing heart.

Her legs grew weak, and she almost fell to her knees as Sunghoon pulled back, his dark eyes gazing into hers.

“What are you doing?” she whispered.

“Something I should have done a long time ago,” Sunghoon replied.

“But you—” Mila swallowed. “You don’t… I thought you didn’t…”

The dorm was quiet. And for a second, it felt like no one had the words to say. But right then, all of a sudden, they heard the voice of the eldest coming from down the hallway. Mila looked at Heeseung, whose eyes held a mixture of longing and regret as he walked up to Mila.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “This was my fault.” He looked at the others. “I said we shouldn’t get too close to you, because we didn’t want you to get hurt… and because we didn’t even know what to do with our own feelings.”

Mila shook her head, clearly still dazed from the kiss. “No. That’s not… I don’t need you to apologise. I just—I just needed to vent.” She wiped her cheeks and sniffled, stepping away from Sunghoon. “I don’t– I’m going to my room. I don’t know what’s happening, or why you’re telling me this all of a sudden, so...”

“No.” Sunoo stepped forward. “Don’t go yet. Just… hear us out for a second.”

Mila looked reluctant, so Heeseung continued. “The thing is, we do love you. More than you know. But it wasn’t until you confessed that we were actually realising that there was a chance that we could actually be with you.”

Mila let out a shaky breath. “That can’t be…”

“It’s true.” Jungwon was the one to speak. “We actually talked about it when you left the room that night… We were trying to decide what to do—because all of us liked you for a while now, but none of us expected that you would like all seven of us back.”

Mila couldn’t believe what she was hearing right now. She had gone for so long wondering what it would take to get them to love her in return, or for her to fall out of love with them. She had gone so long wallowing in her own self-pity and doubt, that she didn’t even know the extent of what was happening within the hearts of the others.

She assumed she had rightfully been rejected because they had seen her more of a sister than a lover, or because they were disturbed by the fact that she could love more than one person at a time. It didn’t occur to her that there might be something more behind it.

Her throat felt dry, and she couldn’t find words to say.

“We agreed that we would all lay off and let you choose,” Jay said. “But then we found out how you felt, and then we all disagreed about what to do next. So…”

“So I said that we would just lay off entirely, so that no one would get hurt.” Heeseung looked down at Mila’s wide eyes. “But it hurt–a lot. It hurt because we finally knew that we had a chance… and we decided not to take it.”

“So why now?” Mila asked breathily. “Why not tell me this earlier?”

“That was partially my fault,” Jay said.

“And mine.” Mila turned around to face Sunghoon, whose face had softened considerably—with that same look in his eyes he would always have around her, before everything went up in flames.

“We had a chance to save all of us the trouble, and to just court you together–as a group.”

Mila let in a sharp breath at the thought, an annoying flutter of both hope and wonder filling her chest. Was that even possible? She had thought about it, had dreamt of it many times… But it was different hearing it said aloud.

“But some of us were a bit selfish and didn’t want to go through with it. Until we realised that it would be better to do that, than to see you with someone else.”

Jake rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s really selfish, we know.”

Mila shook her head. “I know about being selfish… but you guys never were. Before… what happened, there wasn’t anything you didn’t do to make me happy, and I–I got jealous even at the thought of you doing the same to someone else.”

Mila didn’t see the way their eyes softened when she admitted it, because they would know all about the sort of longing and pining that came from seeing the person they loved drift further from them.

“You’re not selfish,” she whispered. “I was—am the selfish one. Because I could never just love one of you… It was always all or nothing for me. And I don’t blame you for not feeling comfortable with the idea, because you deserve someone who will treat you like you’re the only one for them, just like you deserve.”

“Don’t say that.” Riki frowned, reaching up to wipe the stray tear that ran down her cheek.

“Please tell me that this is not a dream.” Mila’s eyes shone as they looked up at his. “I don’t want to wake up if it is.”

The boys laughed.

“It’s not a dream, byeol-ah.” Sunoo squeezed her hand beside her. “We’re telling you the truth. We really do love you. And we’re sorry for not saying it sooner.”

“But if you’d let us,” Jungwon continued, “we really want to try and make it work.”

There was a look of understanding between the seven of them, and Mila didn’t know if there was even a second left for her to doubt. But there were so many things she would have to handle: her relationship with Sejun, the idea of having seven boyfriends, the reaction from others… And she was unsure of how she would deal with them when the time came—if she agreed to what they were asking.

All she knew was that she wanted to be theirs. Maybe, just maybe, they could make it work.

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