#anyways *cough* i am gods most normal man

[crazylittlejester]

say it a little louder one more time for the people in the back anon: If he were a woman people would not be treating him this way

We need to respect male victims, even in fandom spaces

Speak it louder for the ones in the back, cause the Fandom brushed over that way to quickly in my book. 3 whole updates of just body shaming Wars and everybody acted like it was nothing, and I thought I was going crazy for being grossed out by it! What's worse is that that's a normal body type for a lot of people, including myself. I can't imagine other fans who say all those comments and felt bad about themselves because the character that looked like them was a laughing stock. And don't get me started on people not treating Wars's trauma seriously. My man would not be a womanizer, and he'd be terrified of women he didn't know or trust. It's disgusting how we don't respect male victims in Fandom spaces too. If he was a chick this wouldn't be a thing and that says something. I'm happy that this is something the fans are leaving behind and stopping, but man that was a weird time to be a LU fan.

-❄ anon

Awful time to be a Warriors fan too. The fandom is starting to treat him better too but it's a few us spamming the tags to get him the respect he deserves. Actually, it's mostly one person because I work a lot and I'm tired but I like to think I help.

And those three updates was about helping Time out so that he could be there for Twilight. People didn't touch a lot on the seriousness of those updates because people were too busy editing Warriors to accentuate everything "he lacked".

[phightingconfessions]

here you go lmao

----

GOD banhammer is so fucking perfect, i've been staring at a picture of him in some way shape or form for probably like fifteen hours out of the last three days. he is just so very mwah i wanna bite his armor it looks so fucking cool bro. and his teeth, good LIRD his fucking teeth those chompers are driving me insane. i wanna put my hand in his mouth and i don't think i'd even be upset if he bit me for that, hell i want him to bite me. he could step on me too and pick me up and throw me down the stairs and i wouldn't even be mad. did i mention how fucking tall he is? mans is like 6 foot 11 inches, thats bonkers, he could punt me into the sun and i'd let him. his hands are probably huge as fuck too. i want him to hold me but i'd settle for being manhandled into a jail cell. he probably patrols the cells on occasion since he's just built different and i'd stand in my 'pathetic homosexual loser' cage and give him a gay little wave as he walks past. blow him a kiss and all that. he might not even notice because he's blindfolded which would be saddening but hey maybe i'll get to feel his touch when he drags me off to be executed or whatever. does he even execute his prisoners at all? if he doesn't i guess i will just rot in that cell until he sees fit to release me. bummer. or perhaps i could seduce him into letting me work as an assistant/maid/etc for him instead. he seems like he'd get off on having someone to order around directly, and i wouldn't mind obeying his every command. anyways as much as i'd enjoy letting him order me around it would probably get boring eventually. he'd probably melt immediately if i gave off even a whiff of dominance. mans still listens to his mom for fucks sake, he'll fold like a wet napkin if i yank him down to his knees and grab his chin. that might be tough with the size difference though. i could back him into a corner and grab his horns and pull his face down to mine and then kiss him or whisper to him or whatever. fuck yeah. not to mention he's blindfolded too, so i could mess around with that. he'd probably be kinda mouthy about it, especially if we have a significant strength difference, but he'd like it. putting a hand in his mouth would probably shut him up. god the thought of running my hand along his teeth is just so fucking enthralling. they look kinda similar to shark teeth. built to maul people and yet here i am touching them like the most foolish creature upon god's green earth. cough this is getting a little too immersive whoops fuck uhhh right! his armor. the gems everywhere is attractive. shiny objects are so cool and banhammer has a gem on like every section of his armor. they probably make cuddling a tiny bit uncomfortable but that's par for the course with armor. i'd put up with it. his weapon looks sick as hell too but i am not a weapons connoisseur, i am a men connoisseur. and this one is delicious cough right his armor. his boots look pretty tough. they probably have treads that'd leave a good mark if he stepped on my back. that'd be cool. i'd let him dig his heel into me with great force. god at this point i dont even wanna fuck him i just want to either destroy or be destroyed by this man. good fucking god why did i write so much. *checks wiki* right he has four eyes. assuming they look like his mom's do it'd probably be pretty cute. two little extra ones beside his normal eyes. he probably winks by closing half his eyes. and now i'm thinking of various seductive faces he could make. i am down so bad i can't even. i wanna kiss him choke him slam him into a wall. or have him do that to me. i'm not picky. one of us is gonna be pathetic, obedient, and submissive and i frankly do not give a fuck which one it ends up being. i'd let him put a collar on me. the thought of banhammer wearing a collar is making my brain do terrible horrible things so i will leave it at that. i do draw the line at like 'daddy' shit tho that's not for me at all & he probably has daddy issues anyway

I've read this like 5 times and I have determined. I will post it.

behold: the banhammer manifesto. I don't think it gets crazier than this I think we've reached craziest post about ban on this blog. well done everyone! I'm going to go cry now bye forever /j

[iguessitsjustme]

The On1y One Ep 4 Thoughts

It has been one million years (2 days) since I have been able to watch this show. And now I have made it. I can now binge this show and I am sooo excited. But once I catch up, I WILL cry. Anyway. Under the cut:

I honestly think that one of my favorite things that I think is gonna happen in this show is Wang starting to at least trust and like Jiang Tian’s mom. Not as a replacement mom, but as an adult who cares about his well-being and understands him and his situation. I love how little pressure she puts on him. She always cooks for him and is never mad when he just leaves. She didn’t even get angry at his outburst about her not being his mom in the last episode so I genuinely think that she is doing it right and I think they’ll at least get a little closer and I love to see that.

That egg is PERFECTLY cooked. What is the problem with these boys?

That egg was raw? It was just runny. No I refuse to believe raw. It was perfect…maybe this is why eggs hurt my stomach…

*chokes on my own gay coughs* *coughing in gay*

*spluttering in gay*

Poor Jiang Tian is too gay for this man. Too gay for this world. He’s just trying to survive.

Yeah, I just started screaming. Piggybacks my beloved.

And now Wang is texting him in class. Truly testing the limits of this model student. I love this.

This school affecting the sleep of these children pisses me off in a special kind of way. THEY NEED TO SLEEP IN ORDER TO FUNCTION AND LEARN. Poor Wang has no choice if he wants to catch up. Absolutely bonkers and insane school. I kill them with my mind powers.

Awwww they’re studying together. And you can tell Jiang Tian was impressed with Wang immediately understanding why he chose the key points he did.

Oh these two go off the cliff. What the fuck is this behavior?

Awwww and now they’re fighting together. Also thank you Wang for adding to my collection of “boys throwing their bags at a bully” (there are two that I know of now. maybe I should make a gif of this one too)

Normal. I am normal. Completely normal about this.

COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY NORMAL.

Also it’s been a minute since I’ve said this but I LOVE this soundtrack so much.

SKLJGHKDHFLHKDHFH;LKDJFLHKJ

I am obsessed with the way that Wang looks at Jiang Tian. OBSESSED with it.

Okay I figured out what is pissing me off the most about this school. Wang is behind because he transferred late. They expect him to attend class and understand everything but also catch up on the semester he missed. By himself. His peers had a semester of being taught by their teachers. Wang has to teach himself. If it weren’t for Jiang Tian, he would be screwed. Even though he is incredibly smart and capable, he is being offered no help from the school. All of the help he has received has been from his fellow students. His friend tells him the weird rules of the school, not the administration. Jiang Tian helps him study to catch up, not his teachers. This is actually insane. I need to have a word with SOMEBODY about why they want my poor baby boy to fail.

This show insists on making me SCREM

No screenshot, but just know the noise I made when Jiang Tian asked if they could come out of the closet was not human.

Someone is up to some SHIT and it’s making me ANGRY. Leave my baby boy ALONE.

Just know. That these men that are beating up Wang. They are on my shit list. And they die now.

Thank GOD I don’t need to stop right now. I think I would lose it actually. On to episode 5.

[kerubimcrepin]

Episode 20 - My Friend Bashi (Part 1)

We had reached the milestone of 20 episodes, and I want to sincerely thank the readers for sticking with me so far. :)

I also have a small announcement: after finishing liveblogging this episode, I will take a very small break from the show to do some reading of articles and comics instead.

It's starting to feel awkward - constantly referencing some canon materials without reviewing them on this blog proper, y'know? I originally planned to do this all at once, before the movie, but I think it'll be more fun to do it in multiple reading breaks, during the show.

So many kids in this city, and Joris is friends with none of them. Except for Tatak.

All analysis and plot leaves my body as I think about how much Kerubim cares about Joris.

He's really not perfect, but no matter how much I joke about his failures, he really does care and try his best.

He's too nice for me to actually make fun of in any serious manner.

It's very nice to see the more down-low, bittersweet moments of parenting and childhood portrayed. It's also nice that it's just between the two of them, without Simone.

I love her, but it's very cute to see just Joris and Kerubim, and how they act when they're alone together.

I think that it's interesting, that even at 7yo, Joris is already at the... "this one social interaction was a disaster, and it's over, just irredeemably over"-level overthinking about relationships.

Perhaps it's knowing that for Kerubim it, often times, was like that. Kerubim did inspire very many people to either hate him with passion, or leave him.

Perhaps it's the fact that, besides Kerubim, Kerubim's friends, and Simone, he doesn't have a family; and besides Tatak, he doesn't seem to have any friends: and that makes him struggle with the idea of losing relationships.

Keke I will be real, I think Tatak is his only friend in general.

...Man. I am making myself sad by writing these things.

I don't think Joris ever had good social skills in his life. Just issues after issues.

As I've said in the previous posts, both Keke and Joris have an issue with needing to be liked always all the time, and the way it makes them do things to seem Cool and Awesome. Even if Joris has this issue in a very introverted way.

It might just be normal kids stuff, but it does add a certain flair to the things we see him do as an adult, if one accepts the idea he's always been like this.

Kerubim's way of connecting to others is to draw from his own experiences, and compare them. It's a more... mature way of cheering up people, than just saying "it gets easier!" like he used to.

For all his faults, Kerubim has grown emotionally from his youth. But it can be a thin line between making everything about yourself, and trying to say that it gets better from experience.

Even so, Joris cares a lot about his experiences and life (cough cough. the Lore), so it works for them, both as a way to distract him and to cheer him up. Kerubim knows this, it's his go-to technique.

Anyway.

I think Kerubim either vastly overestimates the depth of what happened here (I highly doubt Ecaflip is giving him tasks because he's "the best"), or he is lying to Joris, because "I spent my whole childhood afraid that my father, who is a living god, would eat me Zeus-style, because of shit like cleaning the toilets badly or not delivering the fish on time." isn't a nice story.

This is exactly what I'm talking about.

A small aside: according to The Wheel Of Destiny #8 Kerubim Crepin (which will be one of the things I liveblog during the Reading Break), Bashi and Kerubim became friends before the events of episode 3, Strich Hunt.

It makes a lot of sense, because before the events of that episode, Ecaflip had... a very rough way of treating and speaking to Kerubim. Even if he had a soft spot for him, enough to save him (and then manipulate him) during said Wheel of Destiny article, I think Kerubim only truly cemented himself as Ecaflip's most favourite in the Strich Hunt episode.

Also, considering the fact that in Wheel of Destiny, little Bashi reports to knowing and strongly disliking Atcham, it's safe to say that in this episode we have a confirmed instance of Atcham being canonically present and simply not mentioned.

...keke sure is the guy who says "im the last living crepin. laugh" while having a brother. insane.

I yet again want to gush about the portrayal of relationships in this show.

I think all of us can relate to meeting someone, and not thinking much, — not yet knowing that they will turn out to be one of the coolest people you've ever met.

Anyway, tangent incoming.

One thing that's interesting to me, is that Kerubim is never depicted as having friends in the temple. From what we see, he spends most of the time alone, or with Ecaflip.

The reasons may be:

He is Ecaflip's favorite. He had important tasks from the moment he joined the temple. It alienated people.

He was Atcham's brother. Kids are judgemental, and Atcham is a perfect bullying target. Chances are, they didn't like him due to the association.

He came in very mentally ill and unsociable, due to, y'know, being orphaned, and never managed to make friends because the impression that he's "the sad mentally ill kid" stayed.

No wonder that he got anxious around three people, and then immediately trusted them when they were nice to him.

He probably hadn't had anyone be nice to him in ages. Or, like, acknowledge him too much, at the very least.

I won't elaborate on how I think Atcham was treated in the temple lest I fucking scare you, (Something-something, literally catboy Rule of Rose,) but I will say that, just like Atcham is still violently mentally ill due to whatever happened to him, Kerubim's experiences with loneliness and alienation as a child most likely fueled his dishonesty and attention-seeking behaviours as an adult.

So I understand why, even though Bashi kinda sucks, Kerubim is so broken up about losing him. There's a lot more tragedy to this than one can first see.

It was a very important moment for Kerubim to finally have a person in his life that wasn't his father (who constantly threatened to fucking eat him), one of the kids who either disliked him or were too intimidated to talk to him, one of the random monks, or his severely mentally ill brother (who fucking hated him.)

He was his first friend.

[getranched]

coulddddd we have a rundown of the habitants of the ranch?

Well I'm not sure about every single being who makes this (cosmic nightmare) house a home

But I'm sure we can give you a good rundown!(also PSA this account does deal with unreality so if that kind of thing messes with you be careful)

First up is the Ranch itself! A mimic in its final stage of life! They normally become dungeons or haunted houses but this lovely guy had the (mis)fortune to become a familiar with Moon in around the 1700's I'm pretty sure. And as a fully adult mimic it spawns thousands of baby mimics which end up replacing our furniture and the like.

EREN INTERJECTION i’m eren, OR RIJU, a shapeshifter. i just live here idk. i have a friend who’s a burmese python but he doenst live here. uhmm yeah idk i just eat the food in the fridge and sometimes i’ll throw bits of my fresh kills in there too. idk uhmm yeah im friends w everyone here except for like. FD maybe?? but he doesnt live here i dont think….

tbh i dont really keep up with who comes in and who doesnt HAHA im usually in my room playing with bones or reading when im here at the ranch

Twi interjection! I'm Twilight (or just Marth) i'm just kind of here, and if i'm not, i'm tending to my acnh island Tabantha. (Also this account is being shared between 15 or less people, some are more active than others and their individual accounts are being followed by this one)

Is it really an interjection if everybody’s doing it when nobody else is typing? Who knows! I’m Vivian, local semi-moth humanoid and god/dess of the Lost and the Traveling on occasion. Unlike most local chumps deities, I am a multiversal being, which means I am THE deus ex machina in any given situation, and like to Borrow from other universes. cough cough: ner beskar’gam. Also, I have a sapient AI living in “my” spaceship (which is legally his, don’t tell xem), just for funsies

This is Sky now. I'm not really supposed to be in this galaxy, I crash landed in the front yard on one of my spaceships. I tried apologizing to the landlord but we ended up throwing hands, not my fault. Eventually I stayed at the Ranch tho. Hobbies: leading prison breaks, motorcycle rides, eating lightbulbs for the sake of trolling, antagonizing gods, blasting my friends into space. Ended up adopting a demon cat guy. (Vivian note: this is not the catboy incubus. This is a different demon cat guy) (Sky note: Yeah, my boy is the cat butler, the other catboy is a pain in my ass) (Vivian again: and a pleasure in mine)

This is Luna! I am the goddess of horses and all things related. I spend most of my time as a horse (sometimes a centaur) AND I AM NOT A CHUMP VIVI! anyway I used to run an empire ages ago before it was destroyed, and I got sealed away. I have Twi to thank for breaking my seal! Nowadays I'm restarting my cult (its horse girls mostly rn) and fixing horse races. If you ever see a horse say hello it might be me.

Heyo! I'm saria, local milf. I have deer antlers because some grass god decided it'd be cool to mix the local humans with deer. (to be fair, he was right.) I'm mostly human, though. I stream bloodborne because that game reminds me of my found family and my village. I'm still piecing together what happened to my people, but for now I bake, garden, and play my silly little video game. catch me having tea with a succubus and a doll on tuesdays and shopping with a horse on thursdays.

Hi! I'm Wild! I was Moons first kid after my dog and I accidently ended up in this world, escaped jail, and hid in her man eating garden. Most of the time, I sail the seas of my home world and have the best adventures with the greatest pirate crew u could ever imagine. But, I do come visit home from time to time, too, thanks to my crystal that lets me travel through time and space. Somebody's gotta bedazzle FD's tools and give Moon a headache, ya kno?

Yormp here! I’m not totally sure who I am, I’m working on it. Moon says I’m a creature of my own choice, but I’m not too sure about that. Before I was an omen of war, and my friends called themselves pestilence, conquest, and death. Then I died, some time passed, I don’t remember it all, got cursed to be an otter for a bit, and met Moon. Now? I’m just going to college. Learning a little. If I really do get to choose, I think I’ll choose not to be War reborn this time.

Oh… and uhh. Goose.

Hmmm? OH it's my turn! Hey hey hey! I am (the) Sun Sun Sun and when you're with me everything is fun fun fun!. I'm Moon's counter part. We share a body, we share a mind, we are the same person, but not quite! Much like Moon I am also a clown, but instead of resembling a porcelain doll I have the body of a goat (sorta)! You can think of me as Moon's opposite! We may not agree on much, but we do hold our family very dear to us! I'm also referred to as a father and much like Moon, I don't mind what I'm called! Speaking of Moon, she wants her turn to speak now!

Hello, dearest traveler,

It seems you have found our home. I'm (the) Moon. I am the one that eats many gods in this world. But do not worry, it is strictly business. As of this moment, I have taken the form of a porcelain clown. This body was provided to me by a dear friend. I am also referred to as the father of many Ranch residents. Though I am called a father, and might be referred to as Mr. Vilon, I do not care much for what I am referred to as. Most use she/her.

[Psst. Moon. Don't forget to tell them some house rules!]

Ah yes... While you are here traveler, be sure keep some things in mind:

- Mind your teeth and your belongings, else they might be stolen

- Remember to keep your feet off the grass. The plants get hungry after a certain time.

- Not everything is what it seems. I'm sure you will become familiar with our mimics both big and small.

- Do not assume a door, hallway, or stairwell will take you to the same place twice.

- The void will always listen to your troubles.

- Do not pet the cats. Some are... not the kind that you want the attention of. Or maybe they are. That's up to you.

- And most importantly, remember, that sometimes, it is better to stay lost than to be found.

Enjoy your visit,

The Vilons

[gglitchshit]

omg hi, I didn't know you before today but please give me as many of the numbers from the gw2 ask game for gliaster as you want. I am fascinated.

HIII finally after more than half a year. I am here. With all of the numbers. Thank you so much for the ask and the interest in my lil rat. 🥺❤

GW2 ASK MEME 3: Back and worse-er than ever (accepting still I guess. Just slow.)

Putting it under a readmore because. Long. (Also cw for some animal cruelty mentions, dark topics implication and the usual spoilers for LWS4E3 long live the lich~)

1.) Your character is now the leader of their species, whatever that looks like for them (Arcane Councilmember, Imperator, Royalty, etc). How do they govern and what sorts of changes would they make if any?

They would certainly reform education in some way. That's all I can think of rn... :')

2.) What class would your character just absolutely blow at?

(CW: Animal cruelty)

Ranger. They would use any and all animals they find/come across for some kind of fucked up experiment. None of them would stay alive.😞

3.) What person impacted them the most?

*Shows a picture of them surrounded by 500 Joko statues. Surprisingly.*

*Coughs* Anyway, yeah, the moment the asura first learned about Joko in a corner of a library, the impact was made. Gliaster cares about nothing but necromancy and seeing that there was this powerful lich out there was just the cataclysm of everything. Like a god. That man was so otherworldy for Gliaster in everything, even decades later they can't let go of him. Ever.

4.) Assuming they're a commander, how close were they really to Destiny's Edge? To Trahearne?

5.) What would they look like as the side character in someone else's story?

IDK I can only think of as a trope, like in general. Cuz yeah they're kind of a side character for Joko but it's Complicated.

Anyway, they would be the type of side character that's like always around in the background, kind of like as a running gag. Not even them personally always but like a picture of them. Just always there in the corner of your eyes... Always watching.....

6.) They're now a heart NPC/part of a string of quests. What does that involve?

Hhh I have way too many ideas for this. One that would be similar to the Vabbi heart at the Necropolis (Help the living and the dead at the Necropolis) with processing and honoring the dead but also one where they're in Tyria in disguise (they're a wanted criminal in there so gotta be careful lol) spreading Joko propaganda which would be just the opposite of a heart in Ebonhawke. 😭 (Help the people in Ebonhawke). I'm sooo original.

Something other I can think about is some generic asura stuff helping around the lab or with experiments, possibly again involving animal cruelty or even worse, but I already wrote a similar heart for Rikka. 😞

7.) Do they have any skills or abilities that their class wouldn't normally have/just go about their class differently in some kind of way?

Ohhh boy yes they do. 😈 So, they're a necromancer, but with some sub-abilities similar to other classes/specializations' abilities.

For example they CAN "manifest sand shade" like an in-game scourge, but it's actually sand manipulation. They can use sand to lift or carry objects, for example caskets or even themself. They like to make themself taller this way hehe.

They can also summon fire in/around their left hand due to a Djinn's blessing, but can only use it as a light source and can't attack with it.

But most importantly, and also the most powerful of them all, they can manipulate other living beings' blood in their veins, essentially controlling them like puppets. This costs great energy though, so they only use it as a last resort. Later however, when they themself become a lich, this limitation ends and this becomes their main way of practicing necromancy.

8.) How willing are they to bend/break the rules for their cause (be it selfless or otherwise)?

They will literally commit murder for it so yes, very willing.

9.) What's an AU for them you think could be fun to explore?

I do have two AU ideas... one of them fun, one of them just fucked up (and fun. for me.)

The fun: Inquest AU sort of, but so far it's only in the Mists because Inquest member Gliaster is my WvW toon, and haven't really explored it much. Only fashion-wise. Yet.

The fucked up: An AU where Joko somehow has remains. For Gliaster to keep to themself and do whatever with it. And probably prevent any future tragedies that exist in their main verse because of this... :') Exploring dark/taboo sides of my OCs like my life depends on it...

10.) Would/does knowing their backstory change how people (in general but also Tyria at large) view them?

Probably not, it's not like they have a tragic backstory and that's why they are "evil", why they like necromancy or are siding with Joko. Even when they become a lich and seek revenge against Aurene and the Commander, their past doesn't really redeem them.

11.) How accurate is their reputation/image compared to how they really are?

Quite accurate. They don't really show a fake image and are very honest. Their reputation is basically "murderous traitor" in Tyria and "weird little cruel guy who's also Joko's lover" in Elona, so yep.

12.) Have they "completed" the map? What does that look like in your canon?

In-game they do have full map completion of core Tyria and every other map as well because they're my main and I do every story with them, but in canon... A bit of here and there in core Tyria. They used to have a travelling era before they permanently moved to Elona. But they surely have the Crystal Desert and Elona "completed." But they don't explore every tiny bit of areas like how it is done sometimes in-game to get map completion.

13.) What is the worst/funniest/dumbest article that could be written about them in Tyria's trashiest gossip mag?

In Tyria...some big dumb lie of how they betrayed and murdered the Priory excavation team on their way to Elona. People would blow it out of proportion for sure.

Then in Elona.....people would probably distastefully curious and disgusted about their sexual life with Joko.

14.) Biggest misconception about them?

Not quite a misconception but their looks are quite misleading; they're small and have quite a high pitched voice. Probably nobody would assume from first sight that this little creature tortures and murders people on the regular. First, for science/knowledge, then in Joko's name, and later, their own satisfaction.

15.) What is their favorite and least favorite part of being the commander (or whatever role they play in your canon)?

While they enjoy the privilege of being close to Joko, they also love the luxuries that come with it. What they don't like...hmmm...Head empty no thoughts, so nothing comes to mind, but might edit later if I think of something. :^D

[kinglyisms-archived]

𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘋𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘔𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘳 𝘉𝘰𝘺𝘴 𝘓𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴: 𝘊𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥. 𝘖𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘥𝘦: 𝘡𝘦𝘳𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘌𝘳𝘪𝘤 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵.

   It took him a while but Zero finally got the tea up to Eric’s study and sat it down on top of the coffee table, off to the side of the chess board. Eric had finally managed to talk his father into a game of chess though Artemis seemed very much to not be enjoying it. Zero can never tell if the God likes the game or if he just indulges his son when it’s clear Eric is far to board. He straightens back up, gives a gentle sigh and fixes his clothes a bit more into place. As he goes to turn to leave he feels a cough bubble in his throat that just doesn’t seem to stay down. He covers his face, coughs rather hard into his hand and feels the smallest bit of blood trickle down the side of his face. 

   For the briefest of moments he sways, his head spinning as his heart thumps a bit too slowly. It’s enough to get Eric’s attention given the soft alarmed sound of his name. “Zero!” His forearm is grabbed, gripped tightly in Eric’s hold and he gets him standing back up straight once more, the slightest look of concern on the man’s face. 

   “I’m fine, I’m fine.” He attempts to wave off, tugging his arm gently from Eric’s hold and standing straight on his own. “I probably just pushed it a little too hard today, there’s no need to make a fuss over it.” He feels tired, he feels off, he feels weak and he certainly doesn’t like it. Eric holds him with such delicate hands, he doesn’t need to be babied just because things are a little bit harder today than normal. 

   “You should take it easy.” Eric interjects, not at all fazed by Zero’s words. He’s far too used to him, used to his habits. He knows that Zero plays things off that he probably shouldn’t. How many times has he pushed himself too hard and ended up collapsed on the floor of the kitchen? 

   Still, he shakes his head. “I can’t. I was sick yesterday and I put too much off, now it’s building up.” He has laundry to tend to, dishes to do, food to cook. He’s neglected the dusting, the library, the organization of the books Artemis just leaves lying around. He had a lot of housekeeping to do, and he can’t lay around in bed another day letting more of it pile up. He was the only one who did chores here, in this big place, it takes time. And he doesn’t mind it, normally, he’s just a little stressed. It’s been a rough week, with his health.

   There’s a frustrated look that passes over Eric’s face, he doesn’t like when Zero doesn’t listen. When he’s testing the fates and the limits of his body. “And if you collapse it’ll just continue to pile up anyway. If you take it easy, you can get stuff done and still not end up making yourself sick.” 

   “And then what use am I to you?” The cold snap of the words has Eric blinking at him and Zero tries very hard to pull that back in, to take the words back. He can’t. They’re already out there no matter how much he might regret them. 

   Eric’s face gives no emotion away. He thinks he hates that more. “I don’t want you to be of use, I want you to be alright.”

   “And yet, is that not what you made me for? To take care of this place? To tend to your needs? To serve you?” More or less. Zero was created because Eric was lonely and he needed help. He was to fill two positions. The servant, and the companion. He was much better at one role than the other. “If I am too weak to even fold laundry, what use am I around here? I might as well be a freeloader like Artemis over there.” He waved his hand at the God who didn’t even blink, just continued to stare at the chessboard like he was doing the most difficult game of sudoku on his own. 

   He doesn’t want to be useless. All he wants is to be able to do the things he needs to do without collapsing every time he does a bit extra. Out of all the things in the world he could ask for he didn’t feel like that was the worst. Like it was selfish. Eric doesn’t seem to know how to respond, conversations like this with so much emotion are not his strong suit. Zero sighed and turned to leave, taking a few steps before Eric’s slim fingers wrapped tightly around his wrist, holding him in place. 

   “Zero–” 

   “I don’t want to talk. It’s fine, I get it, it’s not fixable and it’s not your problem.” Twisting his wrist he yanked it from the other’s hold and continued out the doors of the study, willing his heart to still and calm inside his chest. To worked up, to frustrated, he just needed to breathe.

   Eric gets a step toward the door before Artemis’ voice fills the silence left behind. “Leave him be, Vercingetorix. He’s angry, but his anger is not directed at you and further chasing of this will only make it worse.” Artemis moved a chess piece on the board. “He’s angry at what he is.” 

   Lips pursed together Eric twisted and looked at his father. “Is that not the same thing?” 

   “Perhaps, in some regards, but in this case it’s a bit different. Zero’s struggles change day to day. The weather if it’s too hot, the movements if he does too much, the pulse of his heart and the rush of his emotions. Everything around him can trigger a different reaction in his body that can affect his heart and by extension, the rest of him.” Artemis blinked at the chessboard and moved one of Eric’s pieces. Continuing the game alone as he thought. “He does not carry the same vices as most of the creatures I’ve made. He doesn’t need to feed on blood, on sex, on human flesh. But his struggles are not to be ignored either. They, in some ways, can be even worse.” 

   He knocks over the Queen and places the pawn down. “To feel weak, to feel pain, to feel useless, over just walking up the stairs can be enough to harm one mentally. To instill negative thoughts into them like a poison. But, this is the nature of what he is. And, there is no changing what you are.” He picks his head up, looking toward his son. 

   “And some days I think there is no one who knows that more than Zero.”

[soggymentos65]

GOD banhammer is so fucking perfect, i've been staring at a picture of him in some way shape or form for probably like fifteen hours out of the last three days. he is just so very mwah i wanna bite his armor it looks so fucking cool bro. and his teeth, good LIRD his fucking teeth those chompers are driving me insane. i wanna put my hand in his mouth and i don't think i'd even be upset if he bit me for that, hell i want him to bite me. he could step on me too and pick me up and throw me down the stairs and i wouldn't even be mad. did i mention how fucking tall he is? mans is like 6 foot 11 inches, thats bonkers, he could punt me into the sun and i'd let him. his hands are probably huge as fuck too. i want him to hold me but i'd settle for being manhandled into a jail cell. he probably patrols the cells on occasion since he's just built different and i'd stand in my 'pathetic homosexual loser' cage and give him a gay little wave as he walks past. blow him a kiss and all that. he might not even notice because he's blindfolded which would be saddening but hey maybe i'll get to feel his touch when he drags me off to be executed or whatever. does he even execute his prisoners at all? if he doesn't i guess i will just rot in that cell until he sees fit to release me. bummer. or perhaps i could seduce him into letting me work as an assistant/maid/etc for him instead. he seems like he'd get off on having someone to order around directly, and i wouldn't mind obeying his every command. anyways as much as i'd enjoy letting him order me around it would probably get boring eventually. he'd probably melt immediately if i gave off even a whiff of dominance. mans still listens to his mom for fucks sake, he'll fold like a wet napkin if i yank him down to his knees and grab his chin. that might be tough with the size difference though. i could back him into a corner and grab his horns and pull his face down to mine and then kiss him or whisper to him or whatever. fuck yeah. not to mention he's blindfolded too, so i could mess around with that. he'd probably be kinda mouthy about it, especially if we have a significant strength difference, but he'd like it. putting a hand in his mouth would probably shut him up. god the thought of running my hand along his teeth is just so fucking enthralling. they look kinda similar to shark teeth. built to maul people and yet here i am touching them like the most foolish creature upon god's green earth. cough this is getting a little too immersive whoops fuck uhhh right! his armor. the gems everywhere is attractive. shiny objects are so cool and banhammer has a gem on like every section of his armor. they probably make cuddling a tiny bit uncomfortable but that's par for the course with armor. i'd put up with it. his weapon looks sick as hell too but i am not a weapons connoisseur, i am a men connoisseur. and this one is delicious cough right his armor. his boots look pretty tough. they probably have treads that'd leave a good mark if he stepped on my back. that'd be cool. i'd let him dig his heel into me with great force. god at this point i dont even wanna fuck him i just want to either destroy or be destroyed by this man. good fucking god why did i write so much. checks wiki right he has four eyes. assuming they look like his mom's do it'd probably be pretty cute. two little extra ones beside his normal eyes. he probably winks by closing half his eyes. and now i'm thinking of various seductive faces he could make. i am down so bad i can't even. i wanna kiss him choke him slam him into a wall. or have him do that to me. i'm not picky. one of us is gonna be pathetic, obedient, and submissive and i frankly do not give a fuck which one it ends up being. i'd let him put a collar on me. the thought of banhammer wearing a collar is making my brain do terrible horrible things so i will leave it at that. i do draw the line at like 'daddy' shit tho that's not for me at all & he probably has daddy issues anyway

[flutteringfable]

post shouki no kami comfort

finally. FINALLY. ITS DONEEEE -<3

enjoy 2841 words of cael and scara being sweet and in love. it’s 12:19 am so i’m too eepy to proofread this anymore, i’m just happy it’s done, so ignore any mistakes. it should be fine for the most part though!

no warnings aside from a brief blood mention, scara’s arm is broken but it’s more of a large crack in his arm bc doll anatomy, and i guess nudity? in a nonsexual context of course (they take a bath together <3)

moonlight spilled dimly through the trees, barely illuminating the paths through the city. scaramouche didn’t need much light, anyway; he had every route to cael’s house memorized. he coughed, cursing under his breath. why had he been given lungs? they seemed to do nothing but weaken when they were filled with debris. being able to breathe used to be one of his favorite things, because it made him feel more human, but once he discovered how fragile his lungs truly were it was less appealing.

he held one piece of his left arm up to a crack in his elbow to keep it from falling off completely. he was amazed that only one of his limbs had broken, though the rest of his body was covered in sizable cracks and bruises.

if this was anything close to the human experience, maybe scaramouche didn’t really want it after all.

he gingerly lowered his broken arm and wiped synthetic blood from his face, trying to make himself look somewhat presentable and less like the broken mess he was. after taking a deep breath (which ended up dissolving into a coughing fit), he raised his good arm to the door and knocked.

a few moments passed. scaramouche considered leaving before the door opened, and he was greeted by a familiar sleepy face.

“ah— kuni?” cael was rubbing one eye behind his glasses. “what brings you here so la—“

cael paused, and scaramouche watched as the taller man’s face fell. almost immediately, cael was leading him inside.

“what happened?” he exclaimed, a mrrp of panic rising in his throat. “are you okay?”

as scaramouche carefully took a seat on cael’s sofa, he took another breath (carefully this time) before speaking again.

“do… do you remember… the project i showed you?” he despised how weak his voice sounded. “i was… i was so close, cael. i was going to be a god…”

an unfamiliar lump built in his throat, causing his voice to falter. had he not been so exhausted and broken, scaramouche would have made more of an effort to keep the tears from spilling onto his cheeks. every effort to calm himself down only made it worse, and within moments he was a sobbing, hiccuping mess.

almost as soon as the first whimper left his mouth, he was pulled gently against cael’s chest. his head rested perfectly above the taller man’s heart.

“hey, shh, i’ve got you,” cael whispered, cradling scaramouche’s head with one hand. “you’re home now, you’re safe.”

“i’m sorry,” scaramouche mumbled. “i don’t know why i can’t control my tears… i’m sure it’s probably annoying…”

cael shook his head, picking up a roll of bandages from the coffee table. he had brought them in his hurry to get scaramouche inside, presumably.

“there’s no need to be sorry, kuni,” he spoke gently, adjusting scaramouche’s broken arm to bind it temporarily with the bandages. “this is a normal reaction, especially after all the stress of the past few months. you’re not a bother. you can lean against me and cry for as long as you need.”

after cael carefully bandaged scaramouche’s broken arm, he held him close.

“cael…” scaramouche mumbled. “why do you still care so much for me? i’m nothing anymore, i’m pathetic…”

the taller man hummed shortly, puzzled.

“what do you mean, darling?” he asked, stroking scaramouche’s hair. “i don’t think you’re pathetic at all.”

“what good am i to you anymore? i’m not a god; i’m not even a harbinger. i’m just… a puppet now. not even human. what worth do you see in me?”

“i didn’t fall in love with you because you were a god, kuni. hell, i didn’t fall in love with you because you were a harbinger. you are so much more than just your power to me, darling. i love seeing you every morning when you come into the cafe for tea. i love listening to you snark about your coworkers, and about the akademiya. i love seeing you curled up beside me every evening, even if you don’t need to sleep. kuni, you mean the world to me, and it has nothing to do with how powerful or important you are to others. i love you because you’re you.”

there was a brief pause, and scaramouche inhaled. his exhale felt shaky as he balled his fists into the back of cael’s sweater. he didn’t deserve someone this kind to him. every time he thought someone truly cared for him, they would turn and betray him sooner or later. it had been that way his whole life. yet, as he pressed his face against cael’s chest, he felt… safe. the gentle rumbling of a purr overpowered the sound of cael’s heartbeat, but the sound was just as comforting to scara.

“i’m so glad you’re alright,” cael sighed, and the crack in his voice caused scaramouche to glance upwards. “i was… really worried…”

“i can’t understand how you still see worth in me…” scaramouche mumbled. “but i appreciate it, i guess. when… when the traveler and buer brought me down, i —“

“the TRAVELER did this to you?!” cael exclaimed. “the next time i see them—“

“don’t bother.” scara reassured him. “you’ll be getting yourself into more trouble than me if you do something rash, especially to the newly appointed ‘first sage of buer’.”

cael sighed, a discontent mrow rumbling in his throat.

“i want to talk to them, at least. but if they lay a finger on you again, they may not be so lucky.”

“how very bold of you,” scara laughed. “you would really take on the world-renowned traveler for me?”

“you underestimate how dedicated i am to protecting you and your happiness. even if i had to explore to the ends of teyvat or take on the abyss, i would do so if if it ensured your safety.”

cael eased out of the hug, leaning back with a sigh. he reached up to pat scara’s head, gazing quietly at him.

“do you want to take a bath? it might help you relax a little,” he suggested. “if not, we can just go straight to bed, i don’t mind either way.”

scara leaned against cael’s hand. “a bath sounds really nice…”

he smiled as cael kissed his forehead and gently scooped him up.

“a bath it is, then.”

he carried scara upstairs, humming to himself as he nudged open the bathroom door with his hip. cael set scara on the edge of the tub, giving him one last kiss on the nose before drawing the bath.

“do you want me to get in with you? i’d be happy to wash your hair for you,” he offered.

scara glanced quizzically at cael. “i get that you’re trying to take care of me and all, but i can wash myself perfectly fine.”

“that wasn’t the question,” cael chuckled, reaching over to gently nudge the shorter man’s leg. “if you don’t want me to, that’s fine, but if you don’t mind, i want to stick around and talk with you, at the very least.”

there was a pause as cael shut off the water.

“mm, alright,” scaramouche sighed. “you can get in with me… and i guess you can wash my hair if you want.”

he chuckled, reaching over to pat the space between cael’s ears. cael faltered a little, leaning into the touch and purring. he fought back a disappointed whine as scara moved away to undress.

“i should’ve never let you know i liked being pet there,” cael huffed, pulling off his sweater. “it seems like all you do is tease me for it now.”

scara laughed, working awkwardly at his hakama with his bound arm. “well, if your reactions weren’t adorable, maybe i wouldn’t tease you so much.”

“fair enough,” cael shrugged. “do you want some help? sorry, i would’ve tied the bandages a little looser if i wasn’t trying to literally hold your arm together.”

after a moment or two more of struggling from scara, he gave in and nodded. cael moved closer and untied scara’s obi, gently setting it and the attached armor on the floor.

“if you want, you can borrow some of my clothes to wear to bed,” cael offered as he continued.

scara laughed, holding out his arms as cael pulled off his gloves. “they’ll probably swallow me up, since you’re so stupidly tall.”

“yeah, but that’s the best part! i don’t get to experience it as often as others do, because like you said, i’m “stupidly tall,” but oversized clothes are so comfy.”

scara rolled his eyes before cael pulled his shirt up over his head. “whatever. we can sort that out after the bath.”

cael nodded. “alright,” he chuckled. “you can go ahead and get in, i’m gonna get some towe-“

scara flinched as he heard cael abruptly gasp.

“what—?”

“your chest!” cael beamed, purring.

“hm..? oh. yeah, before i went in to pilot the shouki no kami, i had dottore modify my body.”

cael blinked owlishly. “really? dottore did this? i can’t believe that archons-forsaken doctor did something right for once.”

scara laughed. “you and me both.”

“regardless, i’m so happy for you!” cael traced the scars on scaramouche’s chest. he paused, snorting.

“it must be a huge weight off your chest.”

“gods, have you been hanging around the general mahamatra again?” scara groaned, leaning away and scowling. “that’s the worst joke i think i’ve ever heard.”

cael laughed. “okay, okay, i’m sorry! it was just too good an opportunity to pass up!”

“i think i’m starting to understand how that botanist fox feels,” he remarked with a huff.

“nooo! i’m sorry, darling!” cael laughed.

he pouted as scara turned away, and inched closer with a pout.

“c’monnn, don’t tell me you hate me for that,” cael leaned down to put his head on scara’s shoulder. “be thankful you aren’t actually stuck with cyno. i dunno how tighnari puts up with him enough to be his husband.”

scara sighed and reached behind him to pat cael’s head reluctantly. “whatever. you’re stupid.”

“says the one who decided to ask dottore of all people to give him top surgery.”

“weren’t you just saying how proud of me you were?”

cael laughed and nuzzled against scara’s hair.

“i am. i’m so happy for you, my dear.” he softened, reaching around to hold the shorter man by the waist.

scara leaned back against cael in return. they stood there quietly for a moment, enjoying each other’s presence before cael stood back up.

“alright, i guess i should go get the towels now. be right back.”

he kissed scara and headed out, humming to himself.

scara sighed as he sank down into the tub, immediately feeling more at ease as the warm water surrounded him. the bathroom door creaked open as cael returned, setting the towels just outside the tub. he took off his glasses and set them on the counter before he finished undressing and stretched.

“mmh, okay, make room.” he carefully stepped in, easing down into the water.

after a moment of adjustment, cael had scara in front of him, resting against his chest. he gazed down at the ex-balladeer as they relaxed in each other’s arms, earning a scoff from scara after a moment.

“you sure do like to stare,” he remarked, crossing his arms.

cael playfully poked scara’s cheek with a grin. “not my fault you’re so handsome.”

he laughed as scara nuzzled back against his chest. he scooped up a handful of water, pouring it gently over the shorter man’s hair. cael repeated this a few times to make sure scara’s hair was completely wet before he washed it.

“so… what now? i don’t mind living with you, but i imagine lord kusanali will want to have a word with you eventually.”

scara sighed, shrugging as cael worked shampoo through his hair.

“i don’t know. the harbingers probably won’t want me back after i failed such a large-scale mission, and frankly, i have no other business with them besides getting revenge on dottore, so i don’t have much of a choice. she probably knows where i am now, if i’m being honest. i don’t know what she wants with me… she didn’t kill me after the battle, so presumably she sees some use for me. i don’t want to think about it right now.”

“fair enough,” cael replied. “hmm… what do you want for breakfast tomorrow? i know you don’t technically have to eat, but i like cooking for both of us.”

scara pondered for a moment, shutting his eyes briefly as cael rinsed his hair. “i like the way you make eggs, i guess.”

“i think i could arrange that,” cael smiled. “oh— do you want to wash my hair? i can lean down for you if you need since it’s hard to move your arm.”

“…sure,” scara replied.

cael lowered his head, as promised, and scara reached up to rinse his hair. he was careful to keep the water out of cael’s ears as he poured it gently over his hair.

the two spent a while longer in the bath once cael’s hair was washed. cael traced circles on scara’s shoulder with his finger, humming quietly.

“mm, i’m gonna fall asleep if you do that,” scara muttered, pouting up at cael from his place against the taller man’s chest.

cael laughed, sitting up a little. “i guess that means it’s time to get out and dry off.”

scara leaned back, stretching with a soft groan. he stood up, getting out carefully. he picked up one of the towels and bundled himself in it after rubbing his hair dry. cael wasn’t far behind, and yawned softly.

“mmh, let’s go find you something to wear to bed,” he mumbled. “if we take much longer i might fall asleep standing up.”

scara shrugged. “i could carry you if i needed to.”

“with one arm?” cael raised a brow, chuckling.

scara shot him a look, but sighed as he muttered “probably not, i guess.”

cael decided not to tease him further, and led him to the bedroom. the shorter man finally looked tired again as he sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for cael. the creak of a dresser drawer and soft shuffling were the only noises in the room as cael searched through his clothing for something for scara to wear to bed.

“do you want to wear one of my sweaters?” he offered, holding up a pink one with a white cat on the front.

“leave it to you to have something so sickeningly cute,” scara remarked with an amused huff. “but sure. thanks.”

he raised his arms, letting cael gently pull the sweater over his head. just as scara had predicted, it reached well past his waist, and the sleeve ends flopped over his hands. regardless, he snuggled into the plush fabric, sighing softly. he must have shut his eyes a moment too long, because he was startled awake by cael laughing softly at him.

“one more thing, and then i’ll let you go ahead and sleep,” he remarked. “i brought your clothes back from the bathroom; they’re on the chair by the window.”

cael crouched down to help scara back into his underwear, and then brushed his still-damp bangs aside to kiss him on the forehead.

“okay, that’s everything. you can go ahead and get comfy while you wait on me if you want.”

despite his exhaustion, scara managed to wait until cael had changed and was curled up beside him to even think about letting himself fall asleep. once cael was settled in, scara snuggled close and shut his eyes.

“i don’t deserve you, cael,” he mumbled, sighing as he carefully draped his injured arm over cael’s side. “but i’m so happy you care for me.”

cael looked down as he rubbed gentle circles on scaramouche’s back. “on the contrary, kuni. i think you’ve needed someone to care about you for a while now, and i’m more than honored to be that person for you.”

scara yawned, feeling his exhaustion slowly overtake him as he curled up against cael. soon enough, the two were sound asleep in each other’s arms.

[picusviridis]

helloooo you rbd the "ask me about my ocs" post from me so i am here to ask you abt them (even if you said youre not good at answering them. 😔🤝😔)

i would like to know... anything! about ur ocs :] but i know from experience vauge questions r hard to answer so maybe some trivia? like, howd you choose their names or designs. thatd be cool doesnt have to be the sol ones either !! or i think ur sol ones are also repurposed ones? so their original forms would be cool too. either way i would find it interesting :D

you are so nice to me

AND YOU KNOW ACTUALLY? NAMES & DESIGNS I WAS THINKING TO MYSELF JUST NOW "OH THEY AREN'T THAT INTERESTING" THEN I REMEMBERED NO? THEY BOTH HAVE NAME-AND-DESIGN STORIES? that I find funny anyway........

also i realise how long this is IM PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE.

the readmore fucking MOVED?

& ONLY cassius was repurposed . though like before SoL he was . essentially nothing . rotting in my beloveds toyhouse-folder w TWO images (NOW HE'S GOT THE MOST IN MY TH AT... 40...) because I didnt know what to do with him (and it's like... i don't wanna move him out D:) & then i made him in SoL and i think a neuron fired or something idk what happend . the moment I drew him w short hair it all went downhill i think . Anyway, so original cassius, he's named after (coughs) Cassius by Foals . I SAY THIS EVERY OTHER DAY I FEEL "LISTEN TO CASSIUS BY FOALS" (LINKED, THIS TIME.) BUT HE CAME ABOUT COS I SAW A TEMPT6T VIDEO WITH UHH

SOMEONE AS THE GEN 4 GUITARIST. AND FOR DAYS I WAS IN A STATE OF LIKE... ILLNESS? "I NEED TO NAME SOME OC CASSIUS" (....) "I WANNA MAKE THAT GUY AN OC" (....) oh mon dieu now there's a blonde guy in my brain . what the fuck . what the hell? who let him in dude dude dude dude what the hell . tangent but he even was in a band. at first. cos of course he was . a band, fun fact, based on AN OLD POKEMON BAND I HAD . WHICH I HADN'T TOUCHED IN YEARS . BUT cassius was based (i say based loosely) on a shiny minccinno/cincinno named "S I N" so that's fun & the bassist (i.e.) the only other one i . sketched (half-finished?) . i wanna say "oh haha he looks like alfie but with glasses on" but he doesn't . not at all ??? he would have had the same colour hair though. so that's like... the exact same character then

see. him? i wanted to put him here he hasn't seen the light of day in months . ok . where was i . oh yeah this was dropped pretty quickly cos i didnt know what to do with them LOL. now long-haired cassius has been repurposed AGAIN to be cassius' older brother in........the loathingverse! which is cool :-)

& even like i tried so hard to make him fit with the song back when but it NEVER worked and then he gets LOATHING'D AND NOW HE FITS? what the hell man

.

also alfie. alfie oh my god alfie can i say? can i start? do not look at me strangely for this but

this was who he was based on. alfie from fucking blue y . i dont know how i found him nor why i wanted to make a character named alfie because of it but i did AND i needed a name for my achievement hunter (which i portmanteaued, horribly, into his last name) save file(s). So alfie achivunter it was.......... and AND THIS IS WHY HE'S LIKE. THE "DOG GUY". and thats why he looked like THIS at one point :

but i was making his ref & i was like. dear lord this looks atrocious . so im pretty sure i colourpicked from like . ron inside job or something (i distinctly remember being like "this sucks" "what if i made him look like ron instead" & i did) instead and now he looks NORMAL except NOW HE LOOKS LIKE CONNOR SCP CONTAINMENT AND RON INSIDE JOB???? like okay i feel mental every time i say this but like come ON . COME ON?

the Exact Same Man. ok???? i feel like a detective gone mental pointing to a board with red threads and photos like DON'T YOU SEE? IT'S ALL CONNECTED!!! THEY LOOK THE FUCKING SAME!!!!!!! THESE THREE LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh and fun fact alfie is short for alfred he really cannot win . have i said this before? i probably have

& one last thing I guess

these little dots beneath the eyes . it basically means he's got a little evil in him OR really, IMPOSSIBLE TO GET FORESHADOWING. unless you .... know...... the cosmosdex??? yeah. i thought itd fit AND right beneath ALL OF MY OTHER INSANITY. WITH AN ACTUAL LITTLE TRIVIA POINT? HUUUUM. OKAY?

[dncinginthemccnlight]

It had taken time after they had parted for Isolde to feel anything more than the lack of him, a sort of emptiness that swallowed all the color and life in the world, leaving her in a perpetual winter. Eventually, she found a sort of peace even with the ache in her heart by turning all her love to Scotland. She threw herself into her good works, trying to make up for the hurt she felt, the hurt she had inflicted on Javier, by helping the citizens of her country. But now she was in front of him once again and there was nothing in the world that could disguise the ache, the hunger that she felt in his presence. She listened calmly to him as he asked her to stay, but inside she yelled for him to grab her up as he once had and kiss her until both their lips were bruised. "I did not want to leave anyways. It has been too long Javi since I have seen you." Since I have talked to you, touched you, been with you. By God, if he knew how she wanted him.

"I will sometimes take a glass of wine or some brandy in my tea," she teased. "Plus, I could hardly not learn how to drink a bit while being with you. I can't let you have all the fun after all." Truly, Isolde had never been able to drink like Javier and he knew it. It had always taken her only a few drinks to get tipsy, giggly, and silly, leading to (only a few, as she still had a reputation to maintain) nights of her being carried back in his arms. In more recent days, she had found that brandy soothed her throat when she had her coughing fits.

The coughing fits had become all the more frequent, often keeping her up at night, more apt to occur when she was laying down. However, once they started, no matter the time or position, they were brutal, shaking her slender frame, bending her over with their force as she clutched her chest. Red-hot pain shot through her and she winced even as the cough subsided. Her excuse, when it came, sounded hoarse, not adding to her authenticity. Still, his hand was on her back and her body reacted to his touch and her breathing returned to normal. She looked back up at him, her eyes watering, whether from the exertion or emotion, she would not even hazard a guess as she reached up and smoothed his furrowed brow with her thumb. "I am with you, how much better could I be?" How could she convey that she was both the most tormented and the most incandescent she had been in recent memory?

"You have me...in whatever way we may have each other. Javi, I am forever in your corner even if I am away," she whispered, her brow furrowing with worry this time. She had always been the one to stand by his side and she worried that he would try to take on too much alone. She took his hand traveling along her arm as an invitation, wrapping her arms around his neck and reaching up on tiptoes to hug him tightly. "No matter what, betrothals or none, you will always be the man who knows me best," she murmured into his ear. She breathed him in, closing her eyes as she let herself indulge in all the sensations of finally being with Javier.

"With you? There's never been a choice." And for all of Javier's natural charm and flirtation, that reality remains. Love renders even the great King of Prussia helpless. And no amount of pretty debutantes, fine ladies, or women of the night can distract from the ache of his heart in her proximity. "Please, stay." His voice cracks at the request, and were it not for the heavy liquor, he may turn a shade of pink. He is a proud man, despite his insecurities, and such pride keeps him from asking for help. And yet... It is he who needs her, more.

She is everything, he is just Javier.

"I don't remember you being much of a drinker." He comments, though perhaps it had something to do with Javier consuming it all for himself. It is difficult to look back at their youthful love, without seeing the sacrifices he demanded; to have her carry his demons, his insecurities, and even his childishness. Meanwhile, Isolde is the picture of a Crown Princess; strong, intelligent, and easy in spirit. Even in love, Javier wonders of the inadequacy he feels will eclipse it all.

"Is." He blinks, quick to place a hand on her back amidst the cough. His hand soothing along her back, furrowed brow at her excuse. "Are you certain?" He asks in disbelief. No one catches air quite like that. Yet she is quick to dismiss, her hand in his, with her body in close proximity. Javier can practically smell the familiarity of her, and there is calm even as all falls apart by the seams. "If I had you... I would not shoulder it alone." His hands track along her arm, sincerity growing with each ounce of liquid courage. "He was undeserving, anyway." Javier adds, with a crude smirk. "He does not know you the way I do." Or love you, he is tempted to add, but it is left only with his eyes to say.

[bnhabadass]

Pairing: Bakugou x reader Genre: Smut, 18+, Mafia AU Trope: Woke up married Dialogue Prompt: “Aren’t we supposed to be working?”  Warnings: overdosing on cold medicine, mixing cold medicine with alcohol, dub-con, mentions of sex while unconscious, vomiting Word Count: 4,480

This is my contribution to this month’s bnharem collab. I was so happy when I spun the roulette wheel and it landed on my favorite au, the mafia au. I hope you all enjoy and make sure to check out everyone else’s contributions here. Also a big thanks to @doinmybesthere​ for being my beta reader and putting so much work into creating the master list for this collab.

“A fever? Are you fucking kidding me?”

You winced at the voice coming out of your phone. You were curled up in bed, a heavy futon draped over your achey, chilled body. “I’m really sorry,” you croaked into the receiver. “I can’t get out of bed; there’s no way I’ll be able to come into work today.”

“You know how important tonight’s meeting is.”

You could feel the fire in the eyes of your underboss as he spat at you about how important tonight’s festivities were. You couldn’t care less. You hated the guy, but more importantly you hated your father for getting you in this mess.

A debt needed to be paid and your family couldn’t afford to take out a second mortgage on the house. So your father, as smart as he thought he was, went to the nicest restaurant on the far side of town where the boss of one of the most dangerous mobs in the city stationed his office.

A debt for a debt. That’s what he told you as he came home smiling with a big check in his wallet. No one in your family knew where he got the money, but he seemed confident enough that he’d be able to pay it back.

A month went by and one day, three scary men knocked on your apartment door. They said they were there to “collect”.

You were terrified. You thought they were there to rob you, to take the money you had been saving in a rainy-day fund. But no, they came to collect you. Now, it’s been four months and you’re still stuck doing odd jobs for them--grocery and coffee runs as well as spending reports and other money related things you are less than qualified to do.

You hate your job. You hate having to put up with the unorthodox hours and the unsavory jobs and the complaints about your work ethic and the having to do it over again because you didn’t do it right the first time. You want out. If you weren’t positive that if you left they would be able to hunt you down, you would have fled the country by now.

But your father’s debt still hasn’t been paid.

“Look,” you pleaded. “I can come in tomorrow and work double my usual time. Please, Kirishima-san, I just need the day to rest.”

“Not a chance. You’re coming in today and that’s final. If you don’t, well, then maybe we need to take an extra payment from your parents.”

Before you could even process what he just said, he hung up the phone.

Another payment from your parents. You couldn’t possibly let them take any more from your family. With a new threat looming over your head, you mustered up enough strength to push off of your futon and get dressed for the clients’ dinner.

By the time it was 7:00 in the evening, you had taken a large swig of cold medicine and were ready to spend the night serving these criminals.

Outside of the restaurant, two bodyguards were stationed at the front door and one at the back entrance. All three of them were dressed in black from head to toe. You, on the other hand, were tasked with serving your boss’s clients, so your outfit differed from theirs.

You were dressed in attire suited for waiting tables. Black slacks stretch across your legs and your pristine shirt was smoothed against your body. A tight black vest clung to your chest and pressed against your boobs, squishing them together. If it weren’t for the fever, chills, and headache, you would look like you belonged with this crowd of criminals.

You flashed your ID to the guard at the back door and he nodded you in. Your eyes had to adjust to the fluorescent kitchen lighting, but once they did you saw how busy everyone was. It truly was one of the most important nights for your boss, so you understood why you were needed. Still, this night would truly take the most out of you.

“Oi, (L/n),” one of your boss’s associates called for you. “Take these to table four. I’ve been covering your ass for the last twenty minutes.”

“Of course, Kaminari-san.” You bowed your head and skirted over to the table where two well-dressed men spoke with one another in a hushed tone. You placed their meals in front of them and bowed your head.

“Wait,” one of them called as you began to walk away. “I asked for a Jasmine tea. This is Sencha.”

“Yeah,” the other one piped up. “And I asked for a Sencha tea and this is Jasmine.”

You wanted to scream. You wanted to yell into the abyss and slap those men across the face. But of course all you did was bow in apology and take the cups back. Kirishima’s words to you over the phone rang loud and clear in your mind.

“Anything they need, you get it for them. These are important people the boss works with and we can’t have idiots like you messing this up for us.”

The men smirked at you and as you turned around to grab their “correct orders,” the man who ordered the Jasmine tea leaned over to leave a hard, painful smack across your ass.

You froze but didn’t say anything and walked away.

It was still early in the night but you had run yourself thin. You needed to sit down or to at least take a sip of water, but there was no room for breaks as you bounced from table to table getting the people what they wanted. You had even left the venue a couple times to retrieve items like the proper creamer one client required in their coffee.

Your throat was so sore and dry and it was aching for a break. Your entire body was aching for a break. But as you saw someone sitting at one of the tables raise her hand to wave you over, you had to put all of your aches aside to tend to her needs.

“Good evening, ma’am.” You bowed your head. “How may I assist you?”

A small smile was on her dark red painted lips. She seemed to be searching for something as she eyed you up and down. “Do you happen to know when Bakugou-san will be joining us?”

Bakugou-san… Were you supposed to know who that is? You had never heard the name before, although you knew your boss had many ties throughout the district. It could be one of them.

“I’m not sure,” you answered honestly. “I could ask my supervisors if they happen to know.”

She waited a moment. She seemed to be searching for something in your expression. “That’s all right. You may go back to work now.”

You bowed and thanked her.

Bakugou-san.

The name did sound familiar, but you’re not sure where you could have heard it. It wasn’t until you were deep in thought, trying to recall where you had heard the name, that you could feel something pushing up against your throat. Oh god. Your stomach was churning.

You ran to the bathroom, pushing someone out of the way to get there. You’d probably hear an earful from Kirishima for pushing a guest, but you needed to find a toilet before--

Oh no.

You barely made it into the stall before emptying the contents of your stomach onto the white tiles of the bathroom floor. Your legs collapsed from under you and you kneeled in your vomit as you coughed up your stomach lining into the porcelain bowl.

Tears fell from your eyes as you struggled to breathe while hacking everything you had into the toilet. The black eyeliner you threw on before leaving the house had smudged into raccoon eyes around your lashes.

You rested your cheek against the toilet, ignoring all of the germs that were most likely crawling up your skin and into your pores. The toilet seat felt cool against your burning cheek and watering eyes. You thought you could die happily here, kneeling on the bathroom tiles in a pile of your slowly cooling vomit.

“Aren’t we supposed to be working here?”

Your eyes shot open, and in trying to stand up you slipped. Your ass landed in the smeared vomit. You winced and let out a drawn out, “fuuuck.”

It took you a moment before opening your eyes again and looking up at the man in front of you. And boy did your eyes widen. He was clearly a guest at the clients’ dinner. His blonde hair was slicked back and the bulge of his muscles under his crisp black button down didn’t go unnoticed by you. His sleeves were rolled up, revealing his forearms and as he crossed his arms over his chest, his sleeves began to tighten.

“Who the hell are you and why are you puking on the floor?”

It took you a second to find your voice. “I’m, um...” you trailed off. “(L/n), sir.” You cleared your throat. “I am a worker for the person hosting this dinner.” You tried to stand up and bow, but he put a hand up to stop you.

“You work for them.” It was a statement not a question, but you nodded anyway. “Why? What do you owe?”

You’re not sure why he was asking, but his intimidating glare compelled you to answer his every question. “My dad owes them money,” you admitted. “And he wasn’t able to pay them back.”

“Who do you mean by them?”

You weren’t sure how to answer. You didn’t even know what these people did. For all you knew they were drug mules or assassins. You never wanted to know what they did when you were roped in. After all, the less you knew meant you could have more of a normal life. “The boss,” you finally answered. Who the boss was, you weren’t sure. You answered to Kirishima but he didn’t have much power aside from ordering around you and every other person unfortunate enough to be roped into working for them.

The man in front of you scoffed. “Get up.”

You scrambled to your feet, ignoring the wave of nausea that hit you. The man led you out of the bathroom, and as you walked behind him, people who passed the two of you stopped and stared. Oh no, it had to be from the vomit stains on your leg and down your shirt. You probably stank to high hell and your eyes wouldn’t stop watering from your fever.

The man stopped and you had to keep from bumping into him. “There’s an extra work shirt in the closet,” he said. “There should also be some slacks in there. Leave your dirty clothes in a pile and I’ll have someone collect them.”

His voice was demanding and it took you a moment to register what he said. It wasn’t until he snapped in your face that you moved.

“We don’t have all day, princess.”

You flinched and nodded before scurrying into the closet and flicking the light on. Inside the closet was the restaurant’s sad excuse for a boiler room. The low humming from the machinery brought you back into the present as you searched for the change of clothes you were promised.

There was a crisp white shirt folded on one of the shelves as well as a few different slacks in varying sizes. The shirt was a size too small, so you had to leave the first couple buttons popped open. Before leaving the closet, you tried to think about who the man was and why he was helping you. Was it possible that he wanted something in return?

When you emerged from the closet, he looked you up and down. You were too tired, however, to notice his lingering glare on your chest and the way the button down squeezed your breasts closer together.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, looking down at your shoes. You’re not sure why you were too scared to look into his vermillion eyes, but the way he called you princess earlier as he snapped at you had definitely made you tremble in your core, and you swore that if you looked up to meet his eyes, your fever would only go higher and higher.

“Why the hell’d you come here if you were sick anyway? Are you trying to poison everyone in the damn building?” His words were like little bullets that shot at every one of your doubts of coming in tonight.

You thought back to why you had come in the first place. You were huddled up in your futon that morning when Kirishima called. You begged to stay home, right? But you couldn’t. You squinted hard as you tried to remember why you weren’t allowed to rest. “I was threatened,” you thought out loud. It wasn’t directed towards the man but he nodded in any case.

“(L/n) was it, right?”

You finally managed to look up at him with bleary eyes. “Yeah, um...” You couldn’t seem to remember what his name was. Wait, he hadn’t told you. He had just led you around and given you new clothes, but he never properly introduced himself.

“Bakugou Katsuki,” he said as if he could read your mind. His lips turned up into a smirk. “But call me Katsuki.”

“Katsuki,” you mumbled. “Bakugou Katsuki.” You had heard that name before, but where. “Bakugou,” you mumbled again as if you were trying to put the pieces of a puzzle together. “Bakugou-san.”

He quirked an eyebrow up at you.

“Oh!” It hit you like a ton of bricks and as soon as you shot up, you had to recoil because of the ache in the back of your neck. “There’s a woman looking for you, Bakugou-san, er, Katuki,” you bowed.

He just chuckled. “There’s a lot of people looking for me tonight. Who was it?”

That’s a good question. You squinted as if you were looking deep into your memories to remember who it was who asked for him. “She was a woman,” you remembered. “With long dark hair and dark red lips.”

Katsuki nodded. “I see the Yaoyorozus are here.”

The Yaoyorozus. You weren’t sure what that could mean but you didn’t feel like questioning it, so you nodded instead.

Katsuki was looking down at you. His arms were crossed over his chest but a smirk that had been playing across his face all night wouldn’t seem to go away. “Feeling better?”

You didn’t feel better. Although you felt cleaner in the new clothes, there was still a throbbing in your head that wasn’t going away and the overhead lights made your eyes water. But the way that Katsuki looked at you like he was expecting you to say yes just drew you in.

He could tell that the way you nodded a yes in response to his question was a lie, and his face fell before pushing a hand up to your forehead, checking your temperature. “Have you taken anything today?”

You had to think back to earlier that day when you brought the bottle of cold medicine up to your lips, not even reading the recommended dose before downing what you could and leaving your home. “Yeah, um, I took some medicine.”

The grin that had been spread across Katsuki’s face returned. “Well I guess we’ll have to get you some more.”

He grabbed your wrist and led you through the halls and over to the bar. You didn’t pay attention to where you were going. The world seemed to be going too fast for you to keep up. What you were able to notice was that everyone’s eyes were on you as you gently swayed back and forth, trying to settle yourself down. As you were in your own head, you couldn’t start to picture what everyone else saw when they looked at you. You with your raccoon eyes due to streaky makeup that you couldn’t stop rubbing.

“Here.” Katsuki shoved a glass in your face. “Not necessarily traditional medicine but it’ll get the job done.”

You looked up at the whiskey glass in his hand. The ‘medicine’ was a deep brown color which swirled around as he handed it to you. Your fingers brushed against his thick ones as you took the glass. You lifted it up to your nose and took a deep breath in, gagging at the smell. “Um, I don’t think I should.” You had been warned about mixing alcohol with drugs and the dangers that came with it, but no one had ever told you not to mix drinks with cold medicine. Still, that couldn’t be right, right?

“Come on, it’s good for you,” he egged you on. “Besides, it’ll get that nasty taste out of your mouth.”

You had never tried whiskey before. You were used to lighter drinks, something bubbly with a shot of vodka or two in it. But this was almost too much. You lifted the glass up to your lips and tilted it back. Your lips stung as they made contact with the drink, but you didn’t want to seem weak to Katsuki. He’d taken care of you so far and seemed pleasant enough, albeit intimidating.

As you tipped it back further and took more of the drink into your mouth, Katsuki pushed his hand against the bottom of the glass so you couldn’t tear it away, making sure you would drink every last drop. It stung going down and the cubes pressing against your lip were colder than you expected. You gagged as a couple loose tears rolled down your face from the drink’s burning sensation. You bet you looked even more of a mess now.

“Good girl,” Katsuki said with a low demeanor. With his thumb, he wiped away a drop of whiskey that rolled down your chin.

“And this’ll make me feel better?” You didn’t think you were supposed to drink when you were sick, but you were far too tired to even think about what was wrong and what was right. If he said that it’d make you feel better, then that had to be a good thing. You’re sure of it.

“Sure will.” He placed a firm, calloused hand on your head and stroked down your hair. You nuzzled into his warmth.

It was such a nice sensation that it almost made you forget that you were supposed to be working. That there were people waiting on you to bring them their food and fetch their creamer, people who were ready to slap your ass and laugh as soon as you turned away.

“I have a,” you started, not really sure where that sentence was going. “I have to go back to work.”

As you began walking away, Katsuki stopped you, pulling you back over so your face was practically pressed up against his chest. “No you don’t. You’re sick, remember?”

Right, as if you hadn’t forgotten. But he was right. You were sick and your medicine hadn’t kicked in yet. You couldn’t risk spreading your germs and getting anyone else sick.

You watched the dinner guests from afar. You leaned in to hear conversations about hitmen and other rivaling mobs around town. Some were about money laundering and clients that needed to be taken out, whatever that meant.

At one point, someone asked to pull Katsuki aside and talk alone, but instead he just pulled you closer.

“The hell do you want, Yoarashi?”

Yoarashi was a big guy, bigger than Katsuki, but it was clear even to you that he was intimidated by the blonde in front of him.

“You owe me for what I let you borrow last month.”

“I don’t owe you shit.”

To you, they sounded like they were underwater and you weren’t sure what they were discussing, but you were curious to learn more.

“Come on, Bakugou. Work with me here.”

“I’m a busy man, Yoarashi. Now get out of my face before I have my men take care of you.”

Something about the raw power and the threatening tone behind Katsuki’s voice made you excited. You wanted to melt into his words, but you weren’t sure why.

“Busy man?” Yoarashi scoffed. “Come on, Bakugou. You’ve barely been seen all night. Where have you been, fucking this little lackey of yours?”

He didn’t mean you, did he? Before you could even comprehend what he just insinuated, Katsuki turned you around and pressed your face up against his chest. You could feel yourself growing even hotter as you were pushed into one of his pectorals. One of his hands cupped the back of your head. Was he protecting you?

“Listen here,” you heard him say. “Don’t contact us ever again unless you want to end up like your first boss did. I can make your life a living hell and I will, got that?”

“Don’t think I don’t have other contacts, all right? You aren’t the only one in this town with resources, Bakugou.”

You felt something jab into the other side of Katsuki’s chest. Did Yoarashi hit him? A few seconds went by before you heard the snapping of fingers and two men came over to drag Yoarashi away.

Katsuki released the hold he had on you, and you watched as the tall man struggled out of his hold. “You aren’t gonna tell anyone what you saw here tonight, right princess?”

You shook your head. You weren’t sure what exactly you felt when you saw that man being dragged away. You were scared, of course; scared for your own life and of the raw power that Katsuki seemed to hold. But on top of fear there was something else. There was a tingle between your thighs that wouldn’t seem to go away, and there was also a sense of excitement. Out of all the people here, this man was paying attention to you. You were far from Mafia material, but he clearly saw something in you and you wanted more of his gaze lingering on you.

Your mind felt hazy with Katsuki and you wanted even more. You didn’t know what to do when you felt him smooth his hand down your back. You didn’t know what to do when his usual smirk turned into something much more dangerous. And you didn’t know what to do when he leaned over and pressed his lips against your own.

His lips felt heavenly as they explored you. They were soft and welcoming despite his cold and dangerous exterior. His tongue probed its way into your mouth. He tasted like whiskey and something else which you assumed was just him. He bit your lip and it felt like he smiled when you let out a moan.

When he released, you felt as if the whole world was spinning with Katsuki. You wobbled around a bit and he chuckled. You tried asking if you could sit down, but the words refused to come out. The last thing you remember is seeing the world go black, the sound of the clients’ dinner fading out of earshot, and two strong arms carrying you away from reality.

You were in pain by the time you woke up. Your body, especially your head, ached tremendously and you wished the sun would stop shining so bright through your window. But wait, the window in your bedroom at your apartment faced another building. The sun never shined too bright in the morning when you were at home.

Slowly, you peaked your head out from under the covers and looked around. You weren’t in your bedroom, but you were in a bedroom. The bed you had been asleep in was enormous, but aside from that there was not much else furniture in the room or even any pictures to signify who the room could belong to.

It wasn’t until you sat up that you realized just how exposed you were under the covers. You couldn’t find your clothing anywhere. What were you even wearing last night? Where were you last night?

You remembered being sick and being called into work by Kirishima. You were stressed. You were nauseous. There was a beautiful woman who asked for someone in particular but you were too sick to remember what their name was, right?

And then you raced to the bathroom and met--

A groan from beside you shook you out of your thoughts, and as soon as you saw the person lying in bed next to you, all of your memories came flooding back.

“Morning, baby girl,” Katsuki said.

You didn’t know what to say. Your mouth hung open and you felt lightheaded.

Katsuki was shirtless under the covers and you were too scared to ask if he had anything on covering his lower half. “You put on quite the show last night.”

Last night. Where you met him. What did you do last night? “I...” You didn’t know what to say, and that made Katsuki let out a booming laugh.

“Come on, you remember at least a little of it don’t you?”

You shook your head. Then you shook your head again. You couldn’t stop shaking your head.

Katsuki put a hand on your shoulder and you stopped. He had a shit eating grin spread across his face that you wanted to both punch and kiss at the same time. “First throwing up at my party and then getting blackout drunk in front of all my guests.”

“What?” You could barely remember anything. What did he mean ‘his party’? The clients’ dinner was run by…

Your eyes widened as you realized just who you had found yourself naked in bed with. Who had found you puking on the bathroom floor. Who that stunningly gorgeous woman was asking for earlier.

You clamped a hand over your mouth and Katsuki let out another chuckle. “You really were the life of the party.” He grabbed your wrist and dragged you over to his side of the bed, and you let him. He dragged his hand up and down your exposed body and roughly cupped your sex. “I had a blast toying around with you last night, but now I want you to be able to remember what it feels like when I bury my cock inside of you, sweetheart.”

You hated the way he was grabbing you and the way he forced your legs to open up for him, but what you hated more than any of that was the way his words made your inner thighs ache and how they instinctively parted just for him.

You turned away as he leaned down to smother your chest with rough kisses, and as you looked over to your left hand, you couldn’t help but notice a diamond ring that wasn’t there the night before.

[absolutelyfizzing]

unwanted feelings

james potter x reader

description - You'd had a crush on James Potter for years and when he kisses Lily Evans in front of you, you are heart broken. Later you find that he didn't actually feel as you expected and he explains himself.

warnings - some angst, unsure reader, fem pronouns, self doubt, negative self talk, not eating for a day cause reader is avoiding someone

word count - 2800

A/N - so this one isn't my best work by far but i wrote it so looks like its getting posted. i don't know why all of my reader inserts lately are so fem and sort of bubbly, i guess it's sort of what i'm aiming for for myself right now but i'm sorry if it maybe isn't coming off as relatable.

MASTERLIST

Your throat tightened in anxiety as you watched James zoom around the pitch. He was reckless when he was playing quidditch and it was one of the things that made him great at the game and an excellent captain. It was also the thing that nearly gave you a heart attack every time you watched him play. You went to every one of his games and you always wore something of his with his colors when you were in the stands. You were stood up on your seat and a slightly bored looking Remus sat to your right, reading from a book you didn't recognize. You'd thought that Sirius playing would be enough to keep him interested but sports was just not something he enjoyed watching. You were usually that way as well but whenever James was playing, suddenly you were the most intent spectator in the stands.

You were more worried than you should have been. More worried than what was appropriate for a friend to be. That's what you were, friends. That had been reinforced many times by the shaggy haired boy and you tried desperately to get it through your head before you embarrassed yourself one of these days. Sometimes though, you just couldn't help it.

Really you might have thought he reciprocated if you didn't know any better. You often got comments on what an attractive couple you guys were but each time it was quickly corrected by James. Normally along the lines of 'Oh god no, we are just friends. Purely platonic' , sometimes followed by a shudder or a gag even. It upset you every time to no end but you played along. You rarely, if ever, contributed to the shooting down of any feelings but that was never noticed by the man you had feelings for.

You'd had a crush on him since you were probably in your second year and now you were coming to the middle of your seventh. There were a million times that you almost said something but every time there was a reminder that you were not the one he had eyes for. It usually took the shape of disgust at the thought of dating you or commentary as he pined over the Evans girl who you felt you could never compete with. How could you when she was just perfect. You saw her to the left of you as she stood in the stands as well and your hands shook with insecurity before looking back toward the game. Your heart raced nearly as quickly as James did around the pitch and you prayed that the snitch would be caught soon so that you could get rid of the stress surrounding you. You felt a hand on your right shoulder and you looked over to find Remus had stood and was looking at you caringly.

"Are you alright, Y/N?" He asked softly and you tried your very best to soften your gaze and calm your stance so you appeared less concerned with someone that you shouldn't have that much interest in in the first place.

"Of course I am. When am I not?" You smiled before looking out at the pitch.

"When youre watching the guy you're in love with play a dangerous game that you don't like." He stated simply in response to the question you meant to be rhetorical and your eyes widened.

"I don't know what youre talking about." You nearly whispered and Remus smiled.

"I'm not gonna tell anyone Y/N but its not exactly subtle. It probably doesn't help that I know the look on your face because it's how I feel too watching Sirius play." He was still smirking but your anxiety was far from eased.

"Oh god, does he know?" You asked scaredly, terrified that the answer would be yes and you would have to stop spending time with him.

"Shockingly, no." You sighed out in relief but Remus continued. "You should tell him though or else he might end up moving on."

"What do you mean? There's nothing for him to move on from. Everyone knows he's in love with Evans and he has made it pretty clear that he is opposed to being anything more than a friendly relationship with me." You choked out, struggling with the words leaving your lips but knowing them to be true.

"I mean he has a minor crush on Evans but it's nothing compared to the annoyingly huge crush he has on you. He's probably just overcompensating for the fact that he's insecure and doesn't want you to reject him."

"Why are you telling me this?" You asked sincerely. You were friends with Remus as you were with the rest of the marauders but it was nothing compared to the friendship they held within their group. You knew Remus was more loyal to James than to you so you couldn't understand why, if it was true, Remus would be telling you at all.

"Because he is trying desperately to move on seeing as he is under the impression that you aren't into him and I'd hate to see him throw something away that could be really good for him." Remus smiled gently and you looked at him gratefully.

"I really appreciate you telling me and all but I just don't think I can believe you. I can't even count how many times he has made a big show of not liking me. I love him too much to ruin what we have and I know that if I confessed and it went bad that I would lose him all together. I would rather have him in my life in a way that hurts than not have him in it at all." You stated sadly and Remus sighed but nodded in understanding.

"I get it but just know that I'm being honest and pretty soon he is going to give up on it. I just want to see you both happy but if its too big of a leap, I understand. That's exactly the excuse he tells the rest of us too."

Suddenly cheers erupted from the stands, cutting your conversation with Remus off as everyone ran to rush the pitch. The snitch had been caught and gryffindor won. You were excited for James but you were also a little terrified to walk onto the pitch to see him with the now conflicted thoughts running through your head. Your thoughts were stopped by the image in front of you which was causing the whole crowd to cheer. James had pulled Lily Evans into a kiss in his excitement and your heart stopped. You felt nausea rise in your throat and Remus caught your eye with a sympathetic look. You didn't look at him for longer than a second and you ran off the pitch with tears streaming down your face. You found your way up to your dorm, pushing yourself to get there quickly before the common room filled with students celebrating their victory. James was always one to love attention so he would be getting crazy after the game which he did just about every time they won.

When you made it to your bed, you hurried under the covers, throwing the shirt you were wearing which belonged to James onto the floor. You felt your heart clench at the despair you felt. You wanted to be upset at Remus for getting your hopes up but you knew he was sincere in his want to help. Still you felt that you would probably not be able to face James in the weeks to come. Maybe, given a little time, you could be around him and not be upset at the world for taking away your chance with him. As you laid in your bed, you stared at the ceiling. You felt tears streaming down your face and you grew angry at yourself. He didn't owe you anything, he wasn't into you. That wasn't his fault and it was so unfair of you to expect anything more from him when your feelings were not his responsibility.

You weren't sure how long you laid there but you could hear the party start and end in the common room. It must have been late. Sleep wouldnt come though, you could just feel your heart continue to break and you were stuck in a loop of self pity. You made the decision that the following days would be spent away from James if you could at all help it. That was probably what he wanted anyway and it was the only way that you would get over the pain you were feeling. At some point your roomates entered your dorm and sleep overtook you for a few restless hours.

When you woke up, the sun was barely on the rise. You hurried up and got dressed and ready. You were planning on getting to breakfast early to avoid running into any of the marauders. You found your plans were not going how you wanted when you entered the great hall to find a head of red hair next to a mop of black. Your throat tightened and you quickly moved to turn and head out of the great hall. You heard a familiar voice call your name but you rushed out before you could give it too much thought. You knew that if you let him try to convince you, you would end up having a very upsetting breakfast with your best friend and his new lover. You would rather avoid breakfast.

Throughout the day, avoiding James was proving to be harder than you had thought it would be. You had many of your classes with him and you even sat next to him in a few. He was insistently trying to get you to open up about why you were suddenly so closed off to him but you remained shut off, reassuring him that nothing was wrong and you were just a little tired from the game the day before. You avoided lunch for the same reason as you had avoided breakfast and you felt yourself starting to get a bit lightheaded. Your afternoon was spent avoiding James but soon he was preoccupied with Lily anyway.

You were hid in a corner of the library when a cough alerted you of someone's presence. You looked up to find the very eyes you hadn't wanted to see.

You pushed it down with a gulp and smiled a bit at him, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay but they were growing harder to hold back after keeping everything pent up all day. It probably didn't help that you were hungry and therefor a bit more emotional. You could feel the tears sitting in your eyes, waiting for something to go wrong so they had an excuse to escape you.

"I don't know what I did wrong." He mumbled while looking at the floor in front of you and you took a deep breath.

"There's nothing wrong James, I promise. It's just been a long day." You smiled and your heart picked up speed.

"Since when did we lie to each other?" He questioned and your heart stopped. You were left unsure how to respond.

"Since the truth would cause more damage than good." You spoke honestly. At this he looked up at you and your eyes met. A tear left you and James immediately moved to comfort you but you tried to move away, standing quickly to evade him. You regretted it as spots filled your vision, the lack of food catching up to you. You know that you turned a bit green for a moment because James looked slightly scared.

"Y/N I dont know whats wrong but you look like you should be getting to the hospital wing. You don't look well."

Before you could answer you felt your vision blacken and your legs give out before your consciousness left you completely.

When you woke up, you knew you were in the hospital wing. It smelled sterile and the bed was stiff underneath you. When you started to wake madam pomfrey came to check on you.

"You can't go around with an empty stomach like that again, do you hear me?" She scolded, though her eyes were soft. You nodded solemnly. "I was alerted that you hadn't been to the great hall to eat all day, you have to know that isn't good for you. I'm gonna have a prefect watch out for you the next couple days to make sure you're eating at meal times. Understood?" She asked again and once more you nodded before leaning back and sighing. You looked at your surroundings and were surprised to see the black haired boy next to your bed fast asleep. Your heart took off again and you felt trapped by your environment. As anxiety swirled around in your chest, James had woken up a bit.

"You're awake." James sighed, laced with relief. You still wouldn't make eye contact with him.  You felt the bed dip as he sat on it and you looked up to watch him put his head in his hands as he leaned over. You felt guilt fill your chest more than it already had from hating that you felt any claim over the man in front of you. You knew you were in the wrong and the last thing you wanted was to cause him any pain. "Remus talked to me." He almost whispered.

At that moment, you wished you could have apparated to anywhere else in the world. You looked back down at your lap and tears were once again brought to your eyes. You felt betrayal that Remus would reveal your feelings to James.

"I'm sorry." You apologized and you fiddled with your fingers.

"Why are you the one apologizing, I'm the one whos behaved poorly." He assures and you shake your head.

"That's not fair to yourself. You're allowed to want to be with whomever you want and my feelings should have no effect on that. You've made it clear for years that you weren't interested in me and it is my fault that I couldn't take a hint. I'm so sorry." You gushed out and tears started to fall from your eyes. You felt James get up from your bed and you prepared him to leave but instead you felt arms wrap around you and a kiss came to your head.

"Y/N I have had feelings for you for years. I was just always too scared for myself to even consider that you might feel the same." He whispered out but you felt only a different kind of pain. Even though he had now admitted his feelings, he was still dating Lily. Not you. Almost as if he could hear your thoughts he spoke quietly. "I broke it off with Evans." You pulled away immediately.

"What? Why would you do that?" You asked quickly and before he had a chance to answer you feared the worst. "Oh god is it because of me? James please dont let my feelings have any bearing on who you want to date, I can't stand the thought of being the reason you broke up. Even if we do have feelings for each other, you deserve a chance with Lily if that's what you want."

"It was mutual, actually. She understood that I had feelings for you and she said she had a crush on someone else. It just seemed like I had kissed her a bit rashly on the quidditch pitch and we agreed that we shouldn't have gotten together in the first place. It was only a day anyway." He reassured as he explained himself and you calmed a bit.

"So what does this mean." You got out, almost inaudibly.

"It means that, if you'll have me, I'd like to take you out on a date." He stated as if it were the simplest thing in the world and you almost couldn't believe your ears. Before you were even thinking you were nodding quickly, causing spots to once again fill your vision and James grabbed your shoulders to stabilize you before you both laughed. He pulled you by your shoulders toward him and he caught your lips in a kiss that somehow expressed all of the years of repressed feelings. When he pulled away he smiled at you and sat back on your bed. He spent the rest of the day with you in the hospital wing talking about all of the places he was going to take you in the coming weeks.

[iguessitsjustme]

I Saw You In My Dream Ep 10 Thoughts

I’m behind on this show. I was debating even continuing my liveblog because I am very sleepy and also I have since started my book and now I gotta know how it ends. It took until chapter 4 but now I’m intrigued. Anyway. Reading break so I can eat so I’m catching up on this show. As always, under the cut:

These two are so ridiculously cute. I love them. I sure hope nothing weird happens in this episode.

Noisy sidewalk people go AHWAY.

Oh this other model dude is a creep. Creepy creep creeperston. And Yu is gonna need to save her and that’s gonna cause dumb drama. Where have I seen this before? Oh yeah. Very similar to Love Mechanics which I just binged recently. Do not ask me my thoughts on that show unless you want a whole rant about nothing in particular.

Now Yu. You’re going to explain to your boyfriend that Pan needs a safe place to stay and has nowhere else, right? RIGHT? You don’t gotta tell him why but you can at least communicate that. Right???

YU. Why are you sitting next to your EX and NOT your CURRENT boyfriend?

Honestly, if I were Ai, I’d leave. I would make Yu come after me to explain himself. Somewhere in private. Alas. Ai is a better person than I am I fear.

Noisy sidewalk people go AWAY. Question for my followers that read these: is it impossible to leave a restaurant without yelling? Cause I think it might be impossible.

Ice stop doing the most challenge. Why be a creep when you could literally just go like…read a book or something. I do not understand.

What an evil dream.

But I knew it. The levitating means it’s a dream that represents Ai’s fears and insecurities.

Oh yay we’re getting similar drama for the side couple. Of course it’s just a double dose of jealousy. Why have variety when you can do the same cliche twice in different fonts? I’m yawning. Where’s my book? It’s not something I’d normally choose for myself but it’s more original than this.

Oh my god they’re self aware.

Ice go away. Why is he doing the most to be the worst? See, if I were Pan, I would have posted a picture of the gps tracking device and tagged Ice and said “did you put this in my purse before or after I rejected you?” but again, she’s a better person than I am. Also I’m pretty sure doing that would violate a lot of her contracts. But also someone there needs to call the police what the fuck???

The POLICE. GO TO THE POLICE.

Ice stop breaking into people’s houses challenge. What the fuck is wrong with this man?

Ai’s mom picked up that frying pan and I yelled “Get ‘em girl!” and immediately went into a coughing fit and it seems that’s all the vocal power I had left. Forgot my voice was going out. Worth it. I hope she gets him.

Well that episode was…pointless. Why did that episode exist? Though I would love for a spinoff GL for Pan actually. Give me that? Please?

Anyway on to episode 11. Looks like it’s gonna be…something. Sure. This show doesn’t hurt me nearly as much as others have.

[xoxoavenger]

Challenge Succeeded, Love

pairing: Young!Charles Xavier x Reader

summary: After a small dispute, Y/N knows she has to make Charles regret talking to the girl at the bar.

word count: 2057

warnings: none

masterlist

“Oh, Charles, when are you going to learn that the girls you meet at the bar just aren’t the right ones?” Y/N asked as they walked out of the bar. Raven and her had just pulled him away from a girl who was trying to get handsy, the three deciding to go home. They walked in the rain outside the bar, Charles reached over to grab the umbrella in the holder outside of the door.

“At the rate he’s going, I doubt he’ll ever learn.” Raven said, and Y/N frowned.

“And what, you two are the only girls I’m allowed to look at?” Charles asked, holding an umbrella up for Y/N while Raven held her own up.

“No.” Y/N said meekly, folding her arms. If she were being honest with herself, she was definitely jealous, but she had to keep these feelings away, because Charles could easily tell.

“Then I don’t see the problem.” He shrugged, and Y/N frowned deeper. She looked to Raven, who was looking straight ahead. Y/N knew, though, that she was upset. She was somewhat a telepath, just as Charles is, but her specialty was emotion. She knew what people were feeling, knew how to manipulate it.

Sometimes she wished-

Y/N didn’t finish her thought, feeling Charles in her head already. She shoved him, making the water on the umbrella fall onto her, along with the rain from outside. She shivered from the cold, but didn't join him back under the umbrella.

“You know I hate it when you do that!” Y/N said, walking away and into the rain to further herself from him.

“Something’s troubling you. Why haven’t you told me?” He asked, and Y/N rolled her eyes.

“Like you would want to hear, much less understand.” Y/N picked up her pace, walking ahead, getting drenched as she tried to ignore him.

“I wouldn’t look if I didn’t feel the need to, Y/N. You are important to me and I care. I want to make sure you’re alright.” Charles said, and Y/N stopped, turning to him. He stopped too, holding the umbrella out to cover her. Raven stopped as well, looking between the two, then at the people still walking, now staring at them.

"Have you ever thought that maybe I do tell you everything I need to? I deserve to keep some things private."

"I understand, but you aren't listening to my side."

"You shouldn't even have a side!"

"Every disagreement has two sides! Otherwise, it wouldn't be a disagreement!"

“Guys, maybe here isn’t the best time to have one of your-“

“You’re just so smart, Charles. It seemed you always know what’s right, don’t you? You can just use those amazing powers of yours and know exactly what’s right or wrong. You know exactly what everyone’s thinking all the time, don’t you?” Y/N said, and Charles tried to grab her arm.

“Y/N, can we talk about this at home?”

It was silent between the three. Y/N turned and walked away, moving out of Charles' grasp.

“Hey, you’re going the wrong way!” Raven called, and Y/N didn’t even look back, just continuing to walk.

“Y/N? Hey, Y/N! What the bloody hell are you doing?” Charles practically ran, finally catching up. “Stop walking away. Don’t make me-“

“You already have! You know everything you want to about me!” Y/N yelled, wiping her face and hair. Charles looked at her, and she knew he was in her mind. She tried not to think about it, tried not to think about him and his eyes and his hair and how she was so in love with him,

“Y/N,” Charles said softly, and she knew that it was too late. He had looked, even when she told him not to. He knew now.

“Please, just, leave me alone.” She said, walking away. Raven and Charles watched, both too shocked to say anything to the girl that was now walking away from them.

~

Charles regretted letting Y/N walk away. It had been a week since he had seen her, and he had thought she would come back last night. He tried to find her, but she seemed just out of reach most of the time. It was frustrating to say the least. He had tried Cerebro, but she knew when he was in her head even before he even called out to her. Once he had her location, she would leave.

He knew where she was that night, however. She was at the bar, the same one the three had been at the day she walked away. He had almost exhausted himself to find her without Cerebro, the connection so weak she wouldn’t be able to know he was even there.

And there she was, standing in a dress Charles had never seen her in. His heart skipped a beat as he looked at her. She had her back turned, but Charles still thought she was the only girl in the room. A thought ran through his head, that maybe she had known he was coming.

Why did he let her leave? Why did he let her just walk away from him? Why was he talking to that girl the night of their fight?

He hated himself for it.

Charles fought himself not to go inter her mind, to see if she was even thinking about him. He didn’t want to betray her trust by looking at what she was thinking. He let his eyes drift from her bare legs to the bottom of her dress, which was purple. Charles had to shake his head to calm down. His eyes traveled further up, studying her curves. He got to her shoulder, where the thin straps lay, making her collar bones pop. When he finally got to her head, the loose curls falling in front and behind her, he saw it.

Y/N was talking to a man. He had dark hair and light eyes. He was tall, muscular.

Charles wasn’t jealous.

He almost stormed in, but then she turned. They made eye contact, and Charles felt his heart stop beating. Logically, he knew this hadn’t happened, but it felt like it as they locked eyes. She raised an eyebrow, and Charles belatedly realized that she had gotten into the mansion while he was out, as she was wearing makeup and holding her favorite clutch that she brought everywhere. There was much more than normal, but she looked beautiful all the same. Her hair was curled in a way he had never seen, and Charles’ breath left him. He couldn’t feel his legs as she winked at him, and then turned back to the man. Charles realized that she had let him find her, this was her plan, not his. He sat at a booth, putting his hands to his temple. Charles finally made his way into her mind.

Well thank God you finally found me, Professor. Y/N thought, and Charles frowned.

You wanted me to find you. Charles said into her mind, and he watched as she smirked, still listening to the man in front of her even though her reactions were for him.

Where did you get your degree? Because I thought that was common knowledge before you came. She said, and Charles let out a sigh.

Who’s the man? I thought you said bar people aren’t the people we need to be with. Charles said, and the smirk faltered. He wondered if he had made the right choice with that comment.

Did I? I believe you’re the one who disputed me on that. She said snarkily, before opening her mouth to reply to the man. Charles knew she barely had a clue what the other man was saying, too focused on the conversation in her mind.

Yes, well, I think I realized I was wrong. Charles said when he saw her finish talking, and she shook her head, laughing to play it off.

Did you? Because I don’t believe you. She said, putting a hand on the other man’s arm. Charles glared at her. He was about to respond when someone came up.

“Are you alright sir?” A girl in a white shirt and a black skirt came up. Charles smiled, barely even taking in what the girl looked like before speaking.

“Just forget I’m here.” He said, and the girl blinked before walking back behind the counter

She was cute. Charles wasn’t sure if Y/N was thinking this for him or if she was just thinking it, but he responded to her anyway.

Bar girls aren’t my style. Charles said, and Y/N laughed out loud, making the man next to her chuckle.

Really? What changed in a week? She asked, and he took a deep breath, heart now pounding out of his chest.

You. He said simply as she took a drink of whiskey. He had caught her off guard, and she coughed, the glass in her hand dropping. It startled Charles enough to break their connection, and he watched as the man jumped back, Y/N staring at the ground.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll get some napkins.” The man said, and Y/N nodded. She hadn’t expected him to be so forward; hell, she had expected him to come and beg her back for the team. He was asking for himself, because he wanted her. Charles watched the other man move away, and when he looked back at Y/N, she was staring at him. He slid out of the booth, walking to her.

“I’m sorry, love. I messed up.” Charles said, grabbing her hand. She just stared at him, mouth slightly open.

“Hey, Y/N, who’s this?” The man said, and the pair turned to see him holding napkins.

“This is Professor Charles Xavier.” Y/N said, and when Charles looked down at her he didn’t need to read her mind to know that she wanted an out. He didn’t know where she was staying, but it was probably exhausting being on the run. Luckily, he knew the perfect excuse.

“Her boyfriend.” Charles removed his hand from hers and put it around her waist.

“Yeah.” Y/N said, moving closer and putting a hand on his chest. The man looked confused, and Charles almost felt bad.

“Oh, I thought you were-“

“I know. We were fighting, but that doesn’t give me the excuse to say I was single. I am sorry, Jax.” Y/N said, and Charles raised his eyebrows.

“Right, sorry.” Jax seemed to be uncomfortable now. Y/N grabbed Charles’ sweater, trying to tell him she wanted to leave.

“Don’t worry about the glass.” An employee said behind them, and the pair turned to see her picking up the pieces.

“I’m sorry.” Y/N repeated to the employee, and they turned around to see that Jax was gone. “Let’s go.” Y/N said, walking away. Charles grabbed her hand, and she looked up at them as they left the bar.

“Did you mean it?” Y/N asked after a couple minutes of walking in the dark silence. Charles thought for a second as they kept walking, and it made Y/N’s heart drop. Why would he mean it? She wasn’t important.

“Why do you think like that?” Charles finally asked, and she was almost shocked silent. She had been so deep in her thoughts she hadn’t even realized he was as well. She looked up at him, trying to get a read on his emotions, but he blocked her out. Like he always did.

“So you’re always listening to my thoughts now?”

“You’re thoughts are so loud. It’s like you want me to hear them.” Charles said, and she scoffed.

“You didn’t answer me.” Y/N said after awhile. They were almost at the mansion.

“I didn’t think I needed to. Why would I lie to you?” Charles asked, and Y/N shook her head.

“It’s not like you haven’t before.” Y/N said as they made their way to the road the mansion was on.

“When have I ever lied to you?” Charles asked, and Y/N sighed.

“Well, why would you flirt with that girl at the bar?”

“Why did you flirt with the guy?”

“To make you jealous, of course.” She answered without hesitation. He could read her mind, anyway, so it’s not like he wouldn’t eventually figure it out. Charles’ eyebrows raised, and she tried not to look at him, even though she knew he could read her mind at any moment. She would let him, it didn’t matter now, but it was embarrassing looking at him.

“Well,” Charles said, stopping in front of the driveway to the mansion. He lifted her chin, and she leaned, the two kissing. It was soft and pure, a nice first kiss. “Challenge succeeded, love.”

[ppersonna]

out of my league - knj | 01

you were out of my league. got my heartbeat racing. if i die, don't wake me, cause you are more than just a dream - out of my league, fitz and the tantrums

✹ summary- Kim Namjoon was never supposed to find out about your years-long hopeless crush on him. And he most definitely was not supposed to find out about it in front of all your coworkers in a company-wide meeting.

✹ rating- explicit/18+/nsfw

✹ pairing- kim namjoon x reader

✹ word count- 6.6k

✹ genre- angst, smut, comedy

✹ chapter warnings- swearing, descriptions of sex, sexual content, namjoon being a sexy flirt, jungkook being a himbo, awkward conversations, jimin being a protective bff

✹ a/n- hello and welcome to this fic thats lived in my google docs for almost a year now. without @ladyartemesia @xjoonchildx @untaemedqueen and @chimoona, i would never have posted it. i truly owe so much of my brainstorming and creativity to their incredible brains and thoughts and ideas. i love them very much! i hope you enjoy this first chapter! please feel free to message me, talk to me abt anything!! im always here to chat. ILY!

MASTERLIST

Kim Namjoon was never supposed to find out this way.

You planned to confess your undying, unerring love for your coworker at a better time, a classier place. You would wear a dress that highlighted your features, hair cascading down your back, makeup done to perfection and spritzed with expensive perfume. You’d confess, he’d confess right back, and you’d live happily ever after.

You’d also dreamt that Kim Namjoon would have the slightest inkling of who you are before he finds out about your year long crush. He might know you as the mousy girl in the office who doesn’t talk and doesn’t contribute much other than some crunched numbers and apparently the best coffee brewer in the office. But you’d prefer he knows you well—your favorite colors and movies and foods, what makes you happy and sad; things future husbands should know.

You very much did not think it would happen in a company wide conference, full of over five hundred suit-wearing executives. You did not think it would be done by the office bully, Chungha, who carefully takes over the mic and speaks the words clearly as she presents awards of recognition.

“Congratulations to Kim Namjoon for 5 years with the company, over $4 million in revenue, and the object of ____’s lust and affection. I’m sure you two will have the happy life she’s written in her journal about. Make sure you celebrate with her today!”

The room is silent, so silent you could have heard a pin drop from a mile away. Your face is cherry red and you wish the earth would open up and swallow you whole. Your heart feels like someone has ripped it in half and you stare in horror at the girl smirking at the front. Is this what it feels like to be backstabbed? Namjoon looks perplexed—confusion written on his face as he gestures around to no one in particular like he’s saying ‘what the fuck was that?’

Awkward coughing and clapping begins and Namjoon stands to receive his award, a fine wooden fountain pen, and chances a glance around the room. He easily spots you, with your wide, frightened face. His look remains passive, not hinting what he’s thinking behind those stormy eyes, before he turns and sits back down at the table with his buddies from his department.

You seriously contemplate quitting your job. You could find a new one easily, right? Just stand up and tell your boss you quit and you’re out of there before Namjoon ever sees you again and you’ll never have to face the mean girl who’s ratting you out.

As much as the idea rolls through your head, you know you won’t do it. You love your job, love the security and finances it provides you, and you love to look at Kim Namjoon, all day every day.

You don’t understand where things went wrong.

( one month ago )

It’s 9:03 am. You finish brewing the coffee in the small staff kitchen and sigh at the aroma of the freshly ground beans. Coffee is your favorite meal, favorite time of day, favorite snack, and preferred beverage. You drink it constantly. You’re known as “coffee girl” at work, mostly because no one really bothers to get to know you beyond that. You drink coffee like it’s a devoted religion. You could drink a cup right before bed and still sleep like a baby. It was, put simply, your drink.

The office workers deem you to be the one to make the pots of coffee every morning, claiming you were the ‘best’. You didn’t mind—you preferred to make your own coffee regardless—but you believe your coworkers are trying to pass off the twenty-minute job to someone lower in the office hierarchy. And you were one step above the interns.

The coffee machine chimes to let you know it’s hot, and it’s ready for you. You eagerly pour a mug, a large one, and smile as the waft of freshly ground beans (by you, of course) fills your senses.

You nearly knock the cup out of your hand as Kim Namjoon strolls into the office, eyes set on the coffee.

You feel your throat swell up, like he’s an allergen and you’re caught without an epi-pen. Butterflies swirl in your stomach and you can’t stop staring at him. He pays you no mind, tired yet determined to pour a cup of coffee and get back to his office.

You stand in the small kitchen, clutching your coffee like a lifeline, and pray to god you don’t do something stupid.

Namjoon pours his mug, and you watch his muscular hands grip the coffee pot. He pours a hefty amount of cream and sugar into his cup—it appears even perfect male specimens have their faults. 

Your eyes dance on his face before they tango down his body. You wonder what he looks like in the morning, crawling out of bed with mussed hair and a sleepy smile painted on his face. He’d look at you and tell you you’re the most beautiful girl and kiss you deeply despite morning breath. Maybe he’d take you to the shower to press you against the tile as he fuc-

“Oh!” it startles Namjoon to see you, and the coffee in his hand swishes violently. “Didn’t see you there. Sorry!”

Your heart melts. He’s the picture of kindness and politeness. You recognize it’s been a few seconds and you still haven’t replied.

“It’s fine!”

“Great coffee, by the way,” he smiles. His teeth nearly knock you out cold with their brilliance. “Have a good day.”

He turns and exits the room without so much as a glance back at you. Your knees feel weak.

Kim Namjoon talked to you. He complimented you. He told you to have a good day. It’s the best and most significant conversation you’ve had with your secret crush.

You definitely file that away for another day when you need to reminisce on his compliment, and you scurry out of the kitchen towards your desk.

Park Jimin is waiting dutifully at your desk when you arrive, a smug smile still slapped over your features as you sip at your coffee. Namjoon spoke to you today—how lovely.

Jimin quirks an eyebrow. 

“What’s got you so perky this morning?” 

You’re normally quiet and passive, avoiding eye contact or any semblance of emotion on your face.

You look up at the blonde bespectacled boy. Park Jimin is the closest thing to a best friend in the company. He’s who you spend time with at lunch, see on weekends, and text often. You suppose he’s the closest thing to a best friend you have in your entire life.

You send him a smirk and lean in close to whisper. “Namjoon said hi to me today!”

Jimin sends you a pitiful look and pats your shoulder. Your best friend is well aware of your secret crush and while he thinks Namjoon is a nice guy, he thinks your crush is a little hopeless. He’s the most popular guy in the office, often has dates lined up every weekend. Jimin hears the way he and his friends talk in the break room. The man is definitely not hurting for female attention.

“Oh, honey,” he sighs, unenthusiastically. “That’s great.” He can’t help but feel a twinge of sadness over how excited you’re getting from a simple ‘hello’ from a coworker.

“I know, right? Anyway, lunch today?” You ask as you settle down into your cubicle.

Jimin pushes his glasses up his face and nods. “Of course! That’s why I came by this morning. I wanted to let you know that Jungkook from marketing will join us.”

You make a face, disgust etched in the lines creasing your forehead. 

“Why?”

Jungkook is well known in the company. He’s a loudmouth, a player, a clown, and everyone’s favorite comedian. He’s just not your favorite.

“Don’t be rude,” Jimin admonishes at your grimace. “He asked to join and well—he’s cute. I can’t say no to him.”

“Oh Christ, Jimin,” you groan. “Not you too! Don’t tell me you have the hots for the serial fuckboy?”

He blushes lightly and shrugs. “Maybe I do! Be nice to him today or I’ll eat all your chocolate ice cream I know you have at home.”

You stick your tongue out, petulantly. “Fine, now let me get to work or else Seokjin will be up my ass.”

Jimin smiles and kisses your cheek before he scurries away, back to human resources.

It feels as if barely any time has passed. You’re working hard, running calculations and updating spreadsheets. You have an eye for numbers, and losing yourself in an equation is just another day for you. You’re shaken from your cheerful place by a vibration from your phone, and a text alert popping on the lit screen.

jimin 12:01 pm- it’s lunchtime!! you better get your butt out here!

You smile and text back an affirmative reply, then move to grab your lunch from the company fridge. Gliding down the steps leading to the fresh outdoors, you meet Jimin at the lunch tables in the grass.

Jimin is sitting with Jungkook. You can recognize your best friend by his hair and glasses, and Jungkook by his obnoxious laughter.

“Hi,” you murmur as you sit down and open up the brown bag lunch you’ve brought.

“Hi!” Jimin is excited to see you, and just a pinch over eager to be sitting next to Jungkook.

“You know Jungkook, right?” Jimin asks, a harsh look in his eyes that reminds you to be on your best behavior.

You nod as you pull out a bag of grapes. “Oh, yeah, hey,” you smile. “I’ve seen you around.”

Jungkook delivers you a signature smirk and you feel yourself roll your eyes internally. “Yeah, you’re Coffee Girl, right?”

You pout and glare down at your brown bag lunch. Will you ever become more than just Coffee Girl?

“Yeah, I suppose that’s me.”

Jimin clears his throat to dismiss any awkwardness. 

“So, Jungkook, I hear you like working out? ___ likes to work out too. She drags me to the gym sometimes. Maybe we could all meet up sometime?” You don’t miss the hopeful lilt in his voice. Jungkook does.

“Oh, yeah?” He narrows a sexy look at you, rather—a look he thinks is sexy that you find off-putting. “What do you do at the gym? Little cardio sets with 5 pound weights?”

What an asshole.

“Sometimes,” you state as you take a bite of the homemade salad you handcrafted last night. “Most of the time I’m lifting heavy. I can bench 275 and deadlift 300.”

Jungkook looks taken back. “What, really?” He sounds breathless. “You lift more than Namjoon-hyung.”

At the sound of the love of your life’s name, you pause. Your face heats quickly and Jungkook smirks. Of course, he recognizes this and not Jimin’s obvious flirting.

“Why are you blushing?” He asks. “Did I say something?”

You’re quick to dismiss things. “Um--no. I just um,” you’re grasping at straws. “I’m hot.”

Jimin is trying not to laugh, hiding his mouth behind a petite hand.

Jungkook tilts his head. “It’s not even sunny today.”

You gulp. “Yeah, I must be hot. With a fever. M-malaria… probably.”

Jungkook snorts. 

“You have malaria? Bummer.” He picks at his nails. “I thought for a moment you had a thing for Namjoon.”

“No!” The retort is quick, too quick for normal conversation, and it gives you away.

“Aha!” Jungkook points an accusing finger at you. “You have the hots for him, don’t you?”

Your features melt, and Jimin tries to assuage the situation. “Jungkook, please don’t tell anyone,” he pleads.

Jungkook smiles at you. “That’s so cute. It’s like a little nerdy freshman crushing on the senior class president.”

You bury your head in your hands, suddenly unable to stomach any food.

“Jungkook,” Jimin’s tone becomes more firm, authoritative. “I’m asking you this as a friend. Please, don’t say anything.”

Jungkook holds his hands up to prove his innocence and waves his proverbial white flag. 

“Secret is safe with me,” he promises. “But it’s cute. I know him really well, you know. I could try to hook you two up.”

You blanch, unsure if you want Jungkook saying anything about you to the man of your dreams. 

“I’m good, but thanks,” you offer meekly. “I’m not feeling well. I’m going to head back to work, okay?”

Jimin frowns, knowing you’re feeling like a cornered animal, and nods. “Feel better, babe,” he sighs.

Jungkook watches as you leave and turns to Jimin. “Man, he’s way out of her league.”

Jimin slaps the boy in the chest. “Be nice, asshole, that’s my best friend.”

Jungkook promises to be nice, and Jimin is blissfully unaware that others are listening and that the man beside him is easy to persuade.

( present day )

The company-wide meeting adjourns soon after what is likely to be the most embarrassing moment you’ve ever lived through.

You’re grabbing at your things and trying to run out of the room, desperate to get out before anyone sees you or talks to you or laughs at you.

A hand grabs at the coattails of your suit jacket and you’re pulled backwards with a yelp. You turn to seek your captor and find the concerned face of your best friend, Jimin.

“Are you okay? What the fuck just happened?”

Jimin’s concern makes it all real. Until now you could pretend you were in a fugue state, totally dissociated from reality. Now, you realize that everyone in the entire company is aware of your crush on Kim Namjoon.

You can feel your bottom lip wobble, tears threatening to spill. Jimin murmurs an ‘oh shit’ and drags you out of the large room and into the nearest bathroom. He pushes you to sit against the sink and passes you toilet paper to dab at your eyes.

“I don’t know how she found out!” you cry. “God, I feel so stupid and embarrassed.”

It incenses Jimin. He’s holding it back to ensure you’re okay, but in reality, it’s an HR nightmare waiting to happen. He’ll find who did it and punish them accordingly.

They will suffer. 

“It’s okay, babe,” he pulls you into a hug. “Everyone will forget about it soon. They’ll think it’s just a lame office joke, okay?”

You nod, feeling the slightest bit comforted by his words. 

“How could she find out, Jiminie?” You ask with a sniffle. “You’re the only person who knows.”

Jimin sighs and shakes his head.

“I don’t know, but they’re dead. I haven’t told any-... oh, my god,” Jimin stops suddenly. You look up at him to catch what he’s thinking.

He growls and balls his fists. 

“Jungkook knew.”

You let out a sob and bawl your eyes out into the tissue you’re holding. Jimin holds you tighter while he conjures up a hundred different ways to hurt someone and make it look like an accident.

“Don’t worry,” Jimin sighs, trying to comfort both you and himself. “I’m HR. I have to handle this. I’ll make sure they get what they deserve.”

You feel a sting of pain for Jimin. He’s been hopelessly doting on the man who spilled the beans for a few months now, even got to take him on a few dates. It was still nothing serious, but Jimin was clearly smitten.

“I’m sorry you have to do that, Chim,” you whisper. “I know how you feel about him.”

“Yeah, well,” he swallows thickly. “You’re more important than any asshole.”

Jimin holds you tight for a few minutes longer, before you clean yourself up and steel yourself. Ignore everyone, Jimin encourages. Just get to work, he says. Then you can go home and we’ll drink wine and forget about it all, he promises.

You replay his words in his head like a prayer as you walk down the corridors and towards your office. Everyone in the hallways stops to stare at you. They lean towards their friends and whisper. You hear snippets of their gossip, like “Namjoon” and “out of her league”. It drives the sharp blade lodged in your chest even further. It threatens to collapse your lungs and break your ribs.

You make it to your desk safe and sound and bury yourself in work and forcibly ignore the gawking and the stares. 

Just make it home. Just get through the day. You’re almost there.

You could do this.

You nearly make it the entire day before running into the one person you didn’t want to see, Kim Namjoon.

At the end of the day, you’re taking the stairs down to the parking garage instead of the elevator. The elevator is too busy, too many people, and you’re trying to avoid the stares and giggles at your expense. The stairs are always deserted and you figure it’s your safest bet.

You can nearly hear the wine calling your name at home. A delicate glass of Sauvignon Blanc and some chocolate ice cream and a good cry—it sounds like the best and only way to unwind after the worst day you’ve ever had in your life.

The chanting of your name gets louder and you wonder if you’ve finally lost your mind—if you’re actually hearing your wine bottles all the way at home talking to you.

No, wait. The voice is real, and coming from behind you. You turn around to face who’s calling you and nearly faint at the sight.

Kim Namjoon stands on the landing above you, one strip of stairs between you.

“Hey!” He seems glad he’s caught you. “I’ve been calling your name for a minute.”

You swallow and search for an answer. 

“Sorry, I’m-.. I guess I’m just a little out of it today.”

Namjoon grimaces. 

“Yeah, about that…” he begins as he takes the steps down to be on equal ground as you. Your heart is spinning wildly. He’s so close to you. He’s talking to you. On any other day you’d be erupting towards the sky like a firework. But today isn’t any other day.

“I feel like I should apologize,” he states. “I don’t know what happened. I didn’t plan it or anything.”

Damn him and his kindness. Damn him and his cute, awkward smile.

“No, no,” you assure. “I know you didn’t. You don’t have to apologize.”

It’s hard to make eye contact with the man. You want to, know it’s important in intense conversations like this, but the thought of him seeing you—really seeing you makes you ache inside.

“It was a really shitty prank,” he begins. “I’m sure you don’t even know who I am, let alone have a crush on me.”

For the millionth time that day, your face heats to a near boil. You stammer and you’re sure you’ve blown any chance at even thinking about a date with Namjoon.

“Oh, uh, right,” you seek an answer, beg your brain to pick something to say that doesn’t make you sound stupid. “I do.”

“You do what?” He’s confused and you widen your eyes at what just left your mouth.

“I do know you! I mean, I do have a crush on you! Oh, fuck,” you shove your face into your hands. “Please, ignore that. I need to go. Sorry!” You don’t give him a chance to reply, you book it out of the stairway as fast as your heels will take you.

Today was the worst day you’ve suffered through in your life.

The next few days aren’t much better.

Not only are you “coffee girl”, you’re now also sarcastically called “Namjoon’s girl”. As much as you hate your initial title, you’d prefer it to the new one they throw at you as you walk by.

Jimin rats out Jungkook and Chungha to the bosses. They get two weeks probation and they have to write you apology letters if they wish to keep their permanent files clean of any reprimands. It’s a slap on the wrist, and everyone involved knows it. Jimin is furious and wants the boss to reconsider. You tell him not to push it. You’d rather this be over and everyone to forget it even happened. Jimin unwillingly agrees.

You’re working at your desk, earphones shoved in your ears to diffuse the gossip in the room, when you feel a tap on your shoulder. You turn and are greeted with the face of Judas Iscariot himself, Jeon Jungkook.

“Hi,” he sounds sheepish, cheeks reddening.

You narrow your eyes at him, sharper than steel. “What the fuck do you want?”

He winces, knowing he deserved that. “Well, I just wanted to apologize. I know they told me to write you a letter, but it seems too impersonal…”. 

You can’t believe Jungkook is sucking his ego up and actually coming to you to apologize. You thought he’d for sure be the one to cop out and send a shitty letter.

He continues. 

“I just wanted to let you know that I’m sorry that all went down. I didn’t mean to tell her. She got me drunk and said she saw me eating lunch with you and Jimin. I think she was jealous or something and it slipped out. I know that’s not an excuse. I fucked up your trust and Jimin’s trust. But I just wanted you to know I didn’t do it to be an asshole. She sort of duped me.”

You pause as you take in the man’s apology. He didn’t have to come to you in person. He could have easily taken the shitty route and half-assed a letter to you. But he didn't, and he owned up to his mistake. God dammit.

“I appreciate your apology, Jungkook,” you sigh and you see his body visibly relax. “I’m still mad, but I guess the anger is at her for doing it in the first place. I’m sorry she tricked you.”

He breathes a sigh of relief and kneels down beside you. “I’m really happy you believe me. I was worried you were going to kick me in the nuts.

“I won’t lie, I thought about it.”

He smiles with you, and you feel like this is the restart of a friendship. “I definitely deserved it.”

You shrug and smile. “Jimin would kill me for hurting you. He might even kill me for thinking about hurting you.”

Jungkook’s smile drops at the name of your best friend. Yikes. Looks like there’s still trouble in paradise.

“I think you’d be in similar company with Jimin right now. He’s not speaking to me.”

You let out a breath through your nose. “Yeah, he’s a little protective of me.”

“For good reason,” he admits. “You’re like a cute little flower. A cute nerdy flower.”

“Jungkook,” you warn. “I just forgave you after I was humiliated in front of the entire company. I’d be careful with calling me nerdy right now.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”

It’s hard to stay mad at the boy, no matter how much you dislike his reputation around the office. The fact that he humbled himself enough to seek you out and apologize is proof enough to you of his character.

“It’s okay, Jungkook. I forgive you,” you smile. “Thank you for apologizing.”

He rubs the back of his neck anxiously as his cheeks flare red.

“Yeah, it felt pretty shitty to just… do anything else. Plus, you seem really cool.”

“You seem great, too, Jungkook.”

He smiles and pulls you in for a hug, catching you off guard. For the fuckboy type, he’s surprisingly sensitive and soft. You like that about him.

“I’ll see you around, okay?” He says as he pulls away from you.

“Maybe you should apologize to Jimin, too?” 

His smile drops, but he nods anyway. “Yeah, maybe I’ll go find him now.”

“Good luck,” you offer with a pat on his shoulder.

With a sad smile, he turns and heads down the hallway towards the HR department. You pray Jimin shows mercy to the handsome boy.

A few weeks go by, and you’re sure that everyone has forgotten about you and your most embarrassing moment to date. You make the coffee, you calculate the numbers, everyone ignores you. Things return to relative normalcy.

Until it doesn't. The moment you think you're safe is the moment your guard comes down and everything falls apart around you.

It's when you're in the staff kitchen, grinding fresh beans to brew a second pot of coffee, that it happens.

The kitchen is fuller than usual. You normally try to wait until the lunchtime crowd dwindles and leaves to make your second pot, but you're so desperate for the caffeine that you can't find it in you to care.

You trudge into the kitchen with your handy coffee mug clutched in your tired hands and head towards the cupboards to grind up the beans.

There's a few groups of coworkers lingering in the room, and as your grinder whirs the beans around into a powder, you chance a look around to see who's among the crowd.

Your eyes flick immediately to where a hearty laugh erupts. It makes your heart still in your throat. Namjoon sits with his usual crowd of friends, hand gripping a homemade sandwich while the other assists him in telling his story to his friends. He pays you no mind—why would he?—and you can't help but stare at the way his dark brown hair lays perfectly against his forehead, and his eyes crinkle so cutely at the edges when he smiles.

You nearly forget about the coffee grounds—you're snapped out of your Namjoon-induced trance when suddenly a woman's laugh echoes around the room.

"Look at her," the voice states.

You peer up and see a girl you vaguely recognize. Is she from Marketing? Or perhaps Sales? You’re not sure, but she’s staring at you with a sneer.

“She’s so weirdly obsessed with Namjoon. It’s so creepy.”

Your face turns cherry red and you’re sure your lungs stop functioning. The air your body needs to breathe freezes and your chest aches. 

Namjoon turns to look at the girl before he looks and sees you grasping your coffee grounds tightly.

“Chungha was right—it’s so weird. Namjoon, you should talk to HR about this!”

Namjoon turns back to the gossiping coworker and frowns. “Can you leave it alone? She wasn’t even doing anything.”

The girl huffs and crosses her arms over her chest and looks back at Namjoon.

“How can you stand to be in the same room as her? She clearly thinks she has a chance with you.”

Her words come out like a bite. She punctuates her point with a harsh laugh and the group around her mumbles and chuckles in agreement.

You’re desperately grabbing at anything you can, wanting to leave as quickly as possible before you’re embarrassed further.

“Well, she does!” Namjoon replies loudly, annoyance written in his features. “I was actually going to ask her to dinner this weekend in private, but since everyone is so fucking interested in my love life, I have to do it publicly.”

The room falls silent, and your favorite mug falls out from your hands and shatters on the floor. All sets of eyes stare at you while yours widen with disbelief—you don't even care that you’re standing in a pool of old coffee and shattered ceramic. 

Namjoon stands and heads over to you, bending down to pick up the shards of your coffee mug. You take a few stunted breaths to kneel and help. 

His eyes peer into yours. They’re warm—a chocolate brown color that makes you feel safe.  

“What do you say?” He asks with a smile so gentle it nearly breaks your heart. “Will you let me take you out this weekend?” 

You’re gaping like a fish and the surrounding room is silent—bated breath waiting for your reply. 

“Yes, I would l-love that.” 

His smile turns even brighter, and he stands to throw the broken mug away. 

“I’ll email you the details, okay?”

Your head nods dumbly without thinking. His eyes sparkle as he smiles at you, and he extends his hand down to you to assist you off the floor. As your hand slips into his, you can’t help but feel how soft and strong he feels. You wonder what his hand would feel like caressing your face, smoothing down the expanse of your bare back, running down the length of your body.

The thoughts shake out of you as he winks and kisses your hand gently, causing the gossiping coworker to grunt her disapproval and for murmurs of shock to echo around the room.

“I’ll talk to you later, doll.” Namjoon winks at you before he grabs his sandwich and leaves the room, gesturing to his crew to follow along.

The place on your hand felt warm where his lips once lingered. You no longer cared about the angry glares from the rest of your coworkers. Your heart beats wildly in your chest, and you leave the kitchen nearly floating on cloud nine.

Email from: Kim Namjoon

Sent: 3:06 pm

Subject: Hey good lookin ;)

Hey! 

Just wanted to see how you are! I’m sorry about what happened at lunchtime. That was super petty and uncalled for. I really wanted to ask you out, and I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much by doing it in front of everyone.

I was wondering if you’d like to go out this Friday night after work? Say around 7? If you send me your address, I’ll pick you up.

Let me know!

Xoxo, Joon

You’re sure if you weren’t sitting in your tiny cubicle, you’d be screaming your lungs out.

The second the notification of the email came through, direct from the man of your desires himself, your body froze.

You re-read the message, over and over and over.  

The winky emoji, the xoxo, the nickname ‘joon’. It’s all so much and makes the grin on your face threaten to split your lips in half.

Your fingers press the “FWD” button and you quickly send the message to Jimin, before you stand demurely, attempting to give off an air of professional confidence. You need to talk to Jimin, now.

As soon as you’re out of the eyesight of suspicious coworkers, you bolt down the hallway towards Human Resources. Your high heels click loudly on the tiled floor, but the sound doesn’t even register in your mind. All you can think about is Namjoon, the email, the press of his lips on your hand, the way his smile made you feel as if you could fly.  

The door to HR swings open with your tight grip around the doorknob, and you open your mouth to call to Jimin, the lone employee, when you’re startled by the sight ahead of you.

Jimin sits on the edge of his expansive desk with his arms thrown around Jungkook’s neck and is clearly engaged in a deep, sensual kiss. At the sound of the door opening, they quickly break apart, with matching cherry red blushes on their cheeks and mused hair.

“Oh, shit,” you gasp. 

The men are silent and you can’t help but giggle after a moment passes. “I’ll take it you two made up?”

Jungkook flashes you a dopey grin, one that gives you an answer, while Jimin smirks haughtily.

“Jungkook and I were just discussing, umm… his 401k.”

Jungkook looks at the blonde boy for a moment, confused, before he gets it. “Yeah! Totally. Retirement. Love to t-talk about it?”

You laugh out loud and walk towards the couple.

“I’m sure it was a titillating discussion,” you tease. “I have good news though, if it’s okay to interrupt this retirement planning session.”

Jimin nods and Jungkook rubs at the back of his neck awkwardly. “I guess I should leave?”

“It’s okay,” you smile. “I trust you.”

Jungkook smiles as if he’s just won the lottery. He looks between you and Jimin, face pure and excited like a puppy.

“What’s up?” Jimin asks as he moves to sit down at his desk.

“I forwarded you an email. Read it.”

Jimin nods and logs on to his posh computer, scrolling and clicking before narrowing his eyes and reading.

“Oh, my god.” Jimin’s face is shocked—it's written all over his features. “Namjoon asked you out?!”

Jungkook’s child-like grin turns into one of shock himself. He runs around to stand behind Jimin, eyes seeking over the words of the email.

“Well, hot damn,” Jungkook whistles. “He asked her out.”

Jimin exchanges a look with Jungkook, one that you’re not sure you can read. It quickly slips your mind, however, as you’re more focused on the task at hand.

“Can you come over tonight after work and help me pick out something to wear?” You ask excitedly.

Jimin smiles at you, a touch of sadness in his eyes, before he nods.

“Of course, babe,” he assures. “We’ll make sure you look nice and hot for the date with Mr. Kim.”

“Thank you!” You squeal as you wrap your arms around your best friend. He hugs you back before you scurry out of the office and back to your cubicle, itching to reply to the message.

Jimin sighs as the door to his office closes behind you.

“Kook, please don’t tell me he’s going to break her heart. He’s asking her out to make himself feel better about this, isn’t he?” 

Jungkook slips his hand into Jimin’s and squeezes. 

“I’ll find out, baby.”

Jimin smiles and nods appreciatively at the boy, before leaning up and kissing him.

Jungkook smiles against his lips, and is determined to ensure the young HR specialist never hates him again, even if he has to go behind his hyung’s back to ensure his new boyfriend’s happiness.

Jungkook has one mission now, and that’s ensuring Namjoon takes you on the greatest date known to man.

He grills Jimin with questions about what you like over dinner one night. Jimin finds it endearing that Jungkook is so eager to rectify his mistakes, but he still can’t help but worry that Namjoon is doing this to save face—not because he actually likes you.

“So, what does she like doing?” Jungkook asks as he spins his pasta around his chopsticks idly.

Jimin smiles as he takes a bite of the ramen Jungkook has thoughtfully prepared for their stay-at-home date.  

“I’ve told you already! She’s easy to figure out.” Jimin pats Jungkook’s hand gently. “She loves cooking and baking, working out, daydreaming about Namjoon.” 

“Cooking, hm,” Jungkook looks thoughtful as he takes a bite. “I think Namjoon can work with that. I’ll let him know!”

Jimin tries to hide the anxiety brewing in his stomach. He’s had to plaster on a fake smile for you while you tried on different outfits, wondering which will be the one to finally convince Namjoon he is the one for you. It’s hard to fake it around his boyfriend, too—but something tugs in his stomach that flares the cynical side of him.

Namjoon went from not knowing of your existence, to watching you get publicly embarrassed in a matter of minutes. While Namjoon isn’t a terrible guy, Jimin knows he doesn’t like anything to tarnish the gentleman reputation he’s built in the office. And as much as Jimin likes him, and surely likes his friend Jungkook, he can’t help but feel skeptical.

Jungkook hurriedly pulls out his phone and types away, letting his elder friend know of what he’s found out. Jimin swallows his food, and his pride, and hopes to god his growing cynicism is wrong.

Friday comes slower than you’d like. You wake up every day during the week, one day closer, and your eagerness hits peak levels. Namjoon sees you in the hallways during the week and winks at you, hands shoved in his tight slacks that make you salivate.  

He emails you again Thursday afternoon, confirming things and getting your address. You reply in nanoseconds, uncaring how overeager you come off. 

By the time your alarm clock rings on Friday morning, you’ve already been awake for 4 hours.

All you can do is daydream about the date, the way his hand fits into yours, the warmth of his eyes when he smiles at you.

It’s what fuels you through work.

You hope to god the numbers you’re attempting to work during the day come out right, because your mind is elsewhere for more than most of the day. There isn’t enough coffee in the world, but also your body feels as if you’ve overdosed on caffeine already.

The clock eeks towards 5:00 pm and you’re bolting out the door at 4:56 to head home and get ready for your date.

Jimin attempts to meet you before you leave, but your desk is cold and empty by the time he gets there.  

He sighs and heads back towards his office to gather his things, waving bye to various coworkers as they file out of the corporate building.

He turns the corner towards his office but stops in his tracks as he sees Namjoon’s back to him, phone pressed to his ear.

“Baby, I’ll come over later tonight, okay?” Namjoon speaks into the phone.

Jimin feels his heart fall into the pit of his stomach. He retreats and hides behind a wall, ear carefully peeled to listen to the tall man’s conversation.

“I’m going on this date with that chick from work,” he sighs. “It won’t last more than a few hours. Poor girl has a crush on me and you know the usual assholes won’t leave her alone.”

Jimin bites his lip and clenches his fist. Namjoon thinks he means well, but he knows his suspicions have been confirmed, and he’s torn inside. He wants to tell you, to warn you not to get too invested in the man, but he also has no interest in popping the bubble you’ve been in since the day he asked you out.

Jimin lets it simmer for now. He decides he’ll monitor Namjoon and cut things off if it appears the man strings you along for fun.

Namjoon finishes his phone call with a promise to see whoever is on the other end of the phone later that night, and Jimin quickly pulls out his phone and fakes a conversation with no one when he hears the man approach.

“Oh, Kookie,” Jimin giggles, leaning against the wall casually. “I can’t wait to see you tonight, either, babe.”

Namjoon walks towards Jimin and makes eye contact with the HR specialist.

“Bye, Kook! See you tonight, baby.” Jimin finishes up the fake phone call as Namjoon arrives next to him, and he plasters on his best fake smile.

“Congrats on you and Jungkook,” he speaks sincerely.

Jimin hates how nice he is, hates that he’s a nice guy who gets too wrapped up in his own good looks and reputation.

“Thanks, Namjoon,” Jimin smiles uneasily. “You too! Have fun on your date tonight.”

Namjoon’s face lights up and Jimin desperately wishes he could go back in time to 30 seconds ago, before he heard the conversation, and believe that Namjoon truly wanted to date you.

“Thanks, should be fun, huh?” He winks and nudges Jimin, before he waves a goodbye and continues out the door.

Jimin pulls his phone out of his pocket and dials the number of his boyfriend.

“Hey, baby. We’ve got a problem.”

tag list! - @jimidol @aretha170 @dearbambideer​