#anyways! thats lowkey besides the point
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mini life update in the tags bc i need somewhere 2 rant < 3
#u can ignore but!#in the process of secretly prepping to cut my mum off bc shes got total financial control over me (im 26)#i got a lot of money when i was 18 from an accident n shes basically in control of my assets bc she made it that wah#*way#if that makes sense#like i can only access my money if i go to the bank with her. she lives in a house i boyght her free of charge#sje bullied me into biying another house in wales so she can rent it out as a holidah home n use it as a free holiday spot n said i would#get an income from it but shes given me nothing in the 4/5 yrs weve had it#she put her name on the deeds to all my assets#so i have money but it is inaccessible#i need some bc i need to fund my phd next year but sje wont help me#anyways! thats lowkey besides the point#my dads got a brain tumor n my mum doesnt know i still see my dad bc she thinks i havent spoke to him since je left like 3 yrs ago#but i helped hjm leave bc she was abusing him n had been since i was like 9#n now im stressed out bc my dads not well and i feel like um running out of time with him#but hes in the hospital at the minute after having a siezure a few weeks after his brain surgery#so ive visited him like 3 days in a row n he remarried this year and my stepmum/sisters are so nice#its like having a real family#and it makes me feel guilty yo say that abt my mum n sister#like the guilt of havi g a bad parent is so real tonight fellas im just gonna sit n cry for a few dags#tbd.#if u read this far i love u .. whats hr zodiac#but yeah! this is why im so inactive#n bc im doi g my masters degree but . that pales in comparison rn
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thinking about how lowkey toxic a relationship with corpse would be....
warning, this is very angsty. to the point where i lowkey shed a tear writing this. and that doesnt usually happen lol.
gn!reader (as far as im aware) and sorry for the typos if there are any... 😁
anyway, enjoy! or dont :) m.list
it would prolly just start with you two hanging out. going over to his apartment, maybe hooking up once in a blue moon. but you two mainly cuddling and spending the days together in the dark rooms of his apartment.
he would try to hide from you how much pain he was in when you were around. but it wasnt hard to miss how he would wince at tiny movements and never be able to rest with you in his arms.
and when it got really bad, he hated how you helped him get around with no questions. how you so simply wanted to help him out because you cared. how you would even help him shower, bring in his groceries, cook for him, feed him if you had to.
he hated it because you cared more than anyone had before and you werent even dating. he wished you would just give up on him because it was too much. he wished you would just finally tell him 'hey... we need to talk' because maybe then it would be easier to hate you. but the truth is, he could never hate you. not anymore.
"so... you dont want to be in a relationship?" you asked quietly, confused more than anything. you look at his scarred face and messy head of dark curls. "...why?"
he sighed, "because this is too much," you scoffed, only more confused than before.
"what is?" you looked at him like he was crazy.
"...you," he said lowly, his voice resonating deep in his chest as he ran a hand over his face. you felt your heart pang as you diverted your eyes from him. you pursed your lips and your breathing got heavier. "well- not you- just-... this isnt worth the trouble im putting you through. that i will put you through."
"thats not for you to decide," you tell him, shaking your head at him. "I can choose when to call it quits and so far, im still fucking here."
you couldnt help but be offended. who wouldnt be after the person you care about is pushing you away. as far as you know, its unfair and incredibly ignorant.
"yea but how long until youre not?" he asked back angrily. "how long until you realize you can be doing so much more than taking care of me?"
"i dont want to be doing more! i want to be with you!" you tell him incredulously. he sighs and wets his lips, shaking his head at you. "do you just not want to be with me?"
he looks at you as if you had just said the earth was flat, "of course i do."
"so then why cant we?" you ask in complete exasperation. "what the fuck is the problem?"
"youre too fucking good for me!" he yelled back stepping closer to you. he threw his arms up in defeat, "is that what you want me to tell you? cause its fucking true. and i love you too much to let you rot away beside me."
your expression softens as your eyes dart back and forth between his eyes. in that moment you were speechless. and not because he had told you that he loved you, no you already knew that from his actions. it was the way he had said it. with more emotion than you could have expected from him.
"what if i wanted to 'rot away beside you'?" you asked him quietly.
"then you'd be an idiot," he says simply. "because we both know you have better shit to do. and better people to do that for."
you inhale deeply and release it as another exasperated sigh, "i love you," you say, emphasizing every word. "and its up to me whether or not i stay with you."
"and its up to me whether or not i want you here," he says crossing his arms. you feel you heart pang again, causing painful tingles to run down your arms and settle deep in your palms. "you need to run while you can. fucking get out of here before this gets more fucked up and shitty." you watched as he pointed between you two.
you step closer to him, "what are you so afraid of?" you plead to him with your eyes. just for this moment, for him to open up to you like how he had done hundreds of times before. "are you that scared I'll leave you cause you're what? 'too much'?"
he looked you in the eye, hesitating to speak for a moment. "i-..." he takes a deep breath. "yeah..."
you step closer, "youre not. not now. and it will only get easier." he starts shaking his head, backing away from you. "yes, it will! and if it ever gets to that point-"
"when it gets to that point," he tried correcting.
"no, if. because everything is an if," you say angrily. "you have no clue what its gonna be like. no fucking clue! so let us have this. while it lasts."
he sighs for what seems like the hundredth time that night, "i cant risk that."
"risk what? heartbreak? as if neither of us have gone through that before hundreds of times," you scoff.
"yeah, but ive never been heartbroken over someone like you."
"so then we hope that doesnt happen," you're trying. you're trying so hard to hold onto him. but your grasp is slipping. and he's trying to shake you loose.
"i cant take my chances," he shakes his head. "not this time."
"jesus fucking chirst!" you yell, tears welling up in your eyes. "let me love you! let me be with you! let me take care of you!"
"i cant let you do that! dont you fucking get it?!" he asks stepping closer to you until hes not even a foot away. "i dont want to see you leave! i cant have you around, cause when you do leave, i dont know what I'll do to myself!"
you stare into his eyes as your own vision starts to get blurry from unshed tears. you sniffle, keeping you gaze strongly on him. and you try one final time.
"so dont let me leave now, please," your voice comes out like a whisper. he swallows harshly and closes his eyes to stop his own tears from forming. "i dont want to move on from you when we havent even given it a chance."
"you'll have to," his voice matches yours. he opens his eyes and a tear falls as he looks at you. "fucking find someone who can actually hold you at night. who can make you dinner, who can give you a shower when you cant, who can actually fuck you when you want."
you tried to scoff, but it came out more like a sob, "i dont need that. i need you," your voice weak from the burn in the back of your throat. unshed tears welling up more.
"no you dont," he says, stepping closer. then leaning his forehead on yours. he closes his eyes, "please, go. for me."
your body racks out a sob, gasping for air to get out your next sentence. "if i leave, im just gonna wait for you."
he shakes his head against you, "no. no you wont."
"I'll wait until you realize you do deserve proper love." he continues to shake his head, pretending as if your words arent punching him right in the heart. "ill wait even if it takes you twenty fucking years."
"do you really think I'll survive twenty more years?" he asks with a laugh. you giggle back sadly, pursing your lips at the posibility of him dying. "do you really think I'll find my self-worth that soon?"
"I'll wait as long as i need to."
and you leave. with such a heavy heart but not without more tears than you could have imagined. and you try to move on. not easily but you put in an effort.
he writes songs with lyrics dedicated to you. written for you. whether its in a song about how he only want you at his side or how he has one person he will always be loyal to or about how his exes tried to chance him but one was different. you listen to it and somehow know its you.
you try to find a new partner to fill that void. but he will always be in your mind. as the right person but at the wrong time. the one that got away, if you will.
i like how angsty this was. anywayy, hope you enjoyed 😁😁 -nony
#corpse husband#corpse husband x reader#corpse#corpse x reader#corpse x you#corpse husband x you#angst#corpse angst#corpse husband angst#corpse husband x reader angst#corpse x reader angst#corpse x you angst#nony's back on her bs#aka im mentally ill#aka my angst is fireeee#alexa play fire by bts#nony speaks#teehee#help?
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KARLACH SFW HEADCANONS:
shes literally the least toxic out of everybody 😹😹 SHES JUST SO SWEET !!!! she loves to take care of tav, like after battles she'll have them sit on her lap while she dresses their wounds HELP !!! and the whole time she'll tease them with sneaky touches. she also likes to pick up tav, like spinning them around or throwing them over her shoulder is funny to her.
shes got a really innocent and childlike quality to her especially when shes in love like her and tav banter so often but its always lighthearted and sweet. and theyll play games with each other while traveling like who can throw the rock the farthest or some shit 😹😭 karlach would win normally but she likes to hold back so tav can win.
i also think shes pretty sensitive lowkey and its easy to upset her. she doesnt get mad though she just gets in her feelings and gets sad and distant. might need reassurance from tav sometimes when it comes to how much they love her.
love language:
giving = psychical touch and gift giving.
after not being able to touch people for soooo long of course her love language is touch. she literally cant get enough of tav, she almost always has a part of her touching them. i feel like she likes to wrap her tail around their leg when theyre talking lol like a cat. i can also see her being really excited to give tav items shes found or bought. all because they reminded her of them 🥰 her and tav should start a rock collection she'd love finding pretty rocks for them im crying can u imagine the party walking through the mountain pass and karlach keeps stopping to excitedly point out a rock to tav 😭😭
receiving = obv psychical touch but also acts of service? i feel like she doesnt ever EXPECT anything from anyone so when tav does go out of their way to do things for her it almost makes her cry lol.
shes also def as big and buff as she looks. like 6'4 pure muscle baby. she is a sight to behold. also feel like shes got bangin thighs and some booty too 🤭 she loves to sit tav on her thighs and do some nsfw things with them too lol
KARLACH NSFW HEADCANONS:
okay so karlach i feel is very switchy. like she really enjoys being dominant and on top but she'll also be submissive and bottom too. she really just likes to do what tav wants. that being said i feel like shes rlly a giver like she just wants to see tav get off and it turns her on so much.
ok this might be kind of obvious but she will want tav to call her mommy LMAO like she loves it and she also loves when tav calls her that outside of sex its just so saucy eugh 😜
sooo into thigh riding like will sit tav on her thigh and bounce them or press her thigh/knee betwen tav's legs so they can grind against her like its her favorite OK
cannot get off if tav hasnt yet so how long she lasts usually depends on them. its that serious
okay. listen. i feel like karlach is more on the vanilla side AND I KNOW RHATS NOT WHAT YALL WANNA HEAR BUT YOU WILL HEAR IT ANYWAY !!!!!! like besides the mommy thing she just doesnt have that many kinks BUT she will participate in whatever kinks tav has so 🤷🏼
likes to wear a strap. a big ass gargantuan one too #prayfortavshole i also think shes prolly a lil dry normally cuz of her condition and all that...... but thats ok baby thats why we have lube 😘 (also LOVES when tav uses their spit as lube)
aftercare is very important to karlach cuz she likes to take care of tav already like i said before. like she'll clean them up and maybe suggest giving them a bath after 🥺 and she'll tell them how much she enjoyed it and all that
#bg3#baldurs gate#baldurs gate 3#headcanons#karlach x tav#karlach#karlach x reader#karlach bg3#x reader#karlach headcanons#my headcanons#karlach cliffgate#baldurs gate headcanon
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DELTA DAWN - part 2// Bee in your bonnet
Pairing: camp counselour!joel miller x camp lifeguard!afab!reader
Rating: E!!!!! 18+ MDNI
Word count: 4.8k
Summary: (1979 summer camp AU) Things go south one morning after a particularly catty argument between Joel and our lifeguard in Joel's boat shed/self proclaimed 'man cave'. - Pictures in the moodboard are simply to get the imagination racing and for me to spill my pinterest all over your screens, the reader is at no point described!
Chapter warnings: age gap (20 + 49), enemies to loves - i mean it, mean!joel, lowkey mean!reader but we love them both, slight vouyerism, cigarette smoking, talk of pornographic magazines, complicated relationship (billy and reader dw), oral (fem receiving), semi-public sex (door open but thats it, degrading, pet names (kiddo, sweetie, doll - the good stuff ykyk), fingering idk, slow burn, fem!masturbation dirty talk, no descriptors of reader except she has hair, NO USE OF Y/N.
a/n: eekkkk ok you can probably tell from his horrific piece of writing that ive never done proper smut and i went a little overboard but i'm sure you'll like it anyway. i've probably got one or two more parts of their story left in me, depending on how happy i want the ending to be. Id love to get requests if anyone has any bright ideas! I love the 3 people who are reading this, it really makes me blush and you don't even know it.... also lmk if you want to be on the taglist for any future writings xxxx
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You were up in the chair early. Waking especially to sit and watch as the sun rose higher over the lake and above the pines, hoping to get there before Joel, just so you had time to ground yourself. You toyed with the cigarette between your fingers, a habit of yours that had really been getting you through the last agonising couple of days of avoiding Joel Miller, but there was no putting it off this morning.
Kayaking. Something you’d never really specialised in and were not convinced you'd know how to deal with if things were to go south.However, as always, you kept your doubts to yourself. Joel was taking the kids today, he was good with them and obviously knew what he was doing on the water. You hoped that meant no accidents.
“No smoking in the chair, cupcake.” Here we go again.
“Good morning to you too, cupcake.” You rolled your eyes, not bothering to turn around to see the one thing on your frazzled mind, not bothering to put out the cigarette either,
“Kids’ll be here soon, Lou’s bringin’em” He said coldly in reply, standing beside your chair, his face level with your hips as he looked out to the water.
Even being raised above him like this you still felt vulnerable, what was it about him? He turned to look up at you with his big arms crossed against his torso, “so, be a doll and put that thing out f’me will’ya?” The chair rocked slightly as he patted it, condescending as ever.
You rolled your eyes yet again and dropped the cigarette down beside his feet, raising your eyebrows. It was bratty and yeah probably a little crueller than required, but it felt damn good. “Happy?” you were pushing it, really pushing it, you could see it in Joel's hard expression. his impressive profile was only defined by the hot mid-morning sun as he glared up at you through narrowed eyes. He put on his ray-bans and turned away. =
The kids hung onto every word he said as he stood in front of you explaining to them how to kayak, in a way they never did with Billy or Abel, or even Sharon. You tried to listen, tried to look out at the lake, tried to do something that wasn't blatantly staring at his tight ass, the muscles in his back under his t-shirt. It was torture, adjusting in your chair, shifting around like a bitch in heat.
“Eyes on the water, lifeguard,” He taunted you from the deck, you’d really needed to remember your sunglasses next time.
If you thought the other day was bad, this was worse, sitting there melting into your lifeguard chair watching Joel being the hottest man alive and not caring how it might make you feel. The kids were playing capture the flag in the woods by the light of the setting sun, giving you a minute to cool off against a tree, the cigarettes lighting themselves at this point.
Your skin was lit up by the orange light that dotted through the trees as it sunk below the horizon. It was the first moment of mercy you’d gotten from this god-awful day of Joel Miller and his stupid tanned skin, the little sweat droplets on the back of his neck, his salt and pepper scruff, the thought of how it would feel against your inner-
“Found you,” You smelt Billy before you saw him, his freckled arms embracing you from behind, knocking you out of your dreamy state.
“You know this thing? It's called a shower, real cool I hear?” You chuckled, trying to laugh a little to disguise it as a joke, the last thing it was.
“Haha, very funny,” Billy smirked, planting wet kisses across your neck from behind, the moustache he’d been trying to grow tickling your jaw.
“Quit it,” You raised your hands, your shoulders tensing like an alarmed cat as he grinds messily against you, “There's kids around you little shit.”
Billy murmured a chuckle against your skin, his tongue tracing against it, a sensation that had the hairs on your arms standing up. “I’ll make it quick,” Now there was something you could count on.
“I said quit,” you turned abruptly to look at him, brushing yourself off, realising the harsh tone of voice you’d used. He looked pained, his eyebrows furrowed, eyes darting around your face quizzically.
“You know what,” Billy folded his arms, looking you up and down bitterly, “Im tired of you being a fuckin’ prude the whole time,” His voice was raised, whiny, trying to sound like his father.
You scoffed, putting your head in your hands and shaking your head in disbelief, this kid was insane. “Its not my duty to fuck you whenever you so wish, christ, you really are an entitled son of a gun,”
Billy stamped out his cigarette onto the ground, “Nasty bitch,” he shook his head, spitting on the floor, charming. “Don’t know why I even bother.” He marched off, back to his cabin probably, off to write another song about how much he hates women you’d have the pleasure of hearing at his next gig.
The day was dragging, it seemed unceasing, like this spiralling, horny, angry mess that was your body. The forest was quiet again without Billy’s cursing, often you’d hear a distant shout from a kid who’d been caught or a group of them running around, but it was hard to differentiate from a bird call, or the wind in the trees.
“Trouble in paradise.” Great.
“Look, I am not in the mood, so be a sweetie and kindly fuck the fuck off.”
That earnt an impressed chuckle from behind you, another pair of broad shoulders leaning beside you on the tree. “S’ my darn woods, ‘do whatever the hell i like, thank you missy,”
“Joel I'm serious, whatever witty little jabs you're cooking up, save them for another day,” You looked to him, it was hard to look away whenever you did.
“Wasn’t,” He shrugged, there was that gruff, southern nonchalance yet again, christ how it got to you, the complete opposite of Billy’s incessant bitching. You almost wished he cared enough to go off on you the way Billy tried to.
“Well…” you paused, eyes darting over his face, the strong profile, low set brows, those pouty lips you’d gotten pretty damn used to this week. “Dont,” you concluded.
“You really do have a bee in your bonnet don't you, kiddo,” there it was, just as you’d predicted, calm and collected and making you want to blow his brains out.
You shrugged. “Its Billy,” You shook your head, well that was only one of the bees in your very buzzy bonnet, Joels fucking face was the other. “You heard?”
He nodded, “I heard enough,” you both stood in the ambience of the evening, kids whooping, birds sounding from the trees. “Billy’s a dick you know that, ‘don’t know a single fucker from here to Timbuktu that dont know that,”
You couldn't help but chuckle, relaxing further against the tree, your shoulders untensing for the first time in weeks, forgetting who the enemy was. “You know fuckers in Timbuktu?”
“I bet I do,” he nodded, crossing his arms against his broad chest, the camp staff t-shirt barely accommodating his largeness.
Joel sighed, looking over at you, “got one of them cancer sticks you're always suckin’ on?” you had a whole pack of them in your back pocket.
He thanked you and lit one with the janky lighter you'd stolen from Abel, smoke muddying your view of him. There was a lull. “I don't know why you lead that bastard on,” he said through the smoke.
“Im hardly leading him on,” You scoffed, lighting a cigarette for yourself. “He was the one who wanted to keep this to strictly fuck-buddies,” Lucky for you, imagine being Billies girlfriend, jeepers.
“Sounds like you can’t even do that?” he smirked, and there he was again.
“You know, as I find myself repeating these days, s’really none of your business,” you laughed, turning to him, sighing through the familiar heat in your abdomen, the butterflies that felt more like horse flies in your stomach back and buzzing harder than ever.
“You're makin’ it my business, havin’ your lover's spat in my earshot.” he retaliated calmly.
you opened your mouth to bite back with something that attempted to match his condescension, but that was an impossible task. “You know what,” you settled on, again grasping for something to finish that sentence. “Fuck,” again you were gotten the better of.
“I’m stuck with him for the next three weeks, so, gotta keep sweet for that long I guess, maybe put out a couple times.”
He nodded, stamping out his cigarette next to billies, “S’a damn shame,” The eye contact felt like glass in your eyes, felt a big hand twisting your throat till it turned blue, it was those eyes of his in that permanent, laboured squint which you assumed came with age, they killed you. A damn shame. The words played on repeat like a song on Sharon's broken radio, the static soiling his voice in your mind. A damn shame. He was right, it was a damn shame.
“Would you make sure to deal with those kayaks tomorrow morning’, lifeguard? Just gotta pile em’ up in the shed,” He said over his shoulder as he turned to saunter away.
Before you could get your bearings, you were alone again, admittedly less grateful for it too.
Morning, kayaks, shed. Sounded like a relatively agreeable task that wasn't asking too much right? Wrong. You were lucky your body had gotten into the rhythm of waking up at sunrise cause this was a goliath task. Hauling 15 kayaks from one side of the lake to the other wasn't something you’d factored into your morning of rest and relaxation. You’d planned to take a secret dip, maybe grab a coffee, take a shower if you had time. But no, you were out sweating under the morning sun, huffing like a workhorse.
When the last kayak was hauled into the dirty little shed you reclined on the desk, all dusty and grotty but it didn’t even matter. Heck, you weren't even perturbed by the smug house spider that was perched close to your palm, not even giving a second thought to the porn magazine discarded beside your head. All you could think about was how this wasn't what you’d bargained for when you agreed to go on this little jaunt up to the northwest, oh yeah, and how much you hated Joel Miller.
After a couple of minutes of huffing and puffing, grumbling to yourself about how you were meant to be in LA by now, living a rich and famous life as some kind of starlet, a model, an actress maybe. The shed was a mess, every surface littered with junk. There was fishing equipment, books, more beer cans than you could count, the whole thing screamed Joel.
Soon, without even meaning to, your nimble fingers were straightening objects, tossing the cans into the bin, dusting, flicking through boxes, you even took the spider outside.
“Hey,” You heard a jumpy voice from behind you, clearly receiving the same fright you’d got from the sound of his voice. “What are you-” It was Joel, an accusatory expression all over his knitted brow. He saw the small desk bin behind your back, the cans in it, he saw the neat shelves and dusted desk with all his papers stacked orderly.
“Hey hey hey, I have a system..” Joel bolted over to where you stood, snatching the bin out of your hands, his knuckles grazing yours, you were in deep if such a small gesture made your heart drop so far down. “There's a system,” he repeated, running a hand through his hair and leaning back on his uncluttered desk, looking… pained, addled by the whole thing.
You scoffed, enjoying seeing Joel off guard, it was always you getting snuck up on, getting caught in a vulnerable situation. “Is the system complete chaos, cause wow Joel, im impressed,” you put your hands on your hips, your little red shorts riding dangerously high.
“No one asked you to go messing in my affairs,” he tutted, rubbing his brow, god he was a drama queen.
“Your affairs?” you laughed maniacally, “By your affairs do you mean a few dozen beer bottles, some dusty kayaks and your crusty spank bank mag?”
He scoffed, looking down at the magazine down on the desk. He'd been got, he’d give you that. “Just clear off, don’t need your bitchin,” He turned his back on you, tampering with your neat new order on his desk, “too damn early,”
You were furious, not even a thank you? If not for drastically improving his workspace, at least for stacking the kayaks, a lot of work if you did say so yourself. “Are you kidding,” you whined, walking up to stand behind him, trying to get his attention.
“I’ve been doing hard fucking labour, sleepy head, what were you doing? Jerking it into a porn mag I'm guessing?” he chuckled at this, turning over his shoulder to look at your exasperated expression. “Hard labour?” he murmured, audibly amused by your claim.
“Oh you poor thing,” he mocked, turning round fully to look at you, “Doll, you ain’t done a day of hard labour in your pretty little life.” He smirked wildly.
“You don’t know a thing about my life Miller,” you said, sounding like some cheesy cowboy movie, his accent rubbing off on her a little. This caused a full belly laugh to erupt from him, it caught you off guard.
“Your life ain't nothin’ but sunshine and rainbows, sugar, maybe a day’a ‘hard labour’ would do you some good.” He chuckled, walking across the room and correcting the ‘mess’ you made of his ‘system’. “Fuck you,” you bellowed, crossing your arms, your eyes wide and full of fury as you watched him in all his casual, condescending glory.
“You are maybe the most infuriating motherfuck on this damn earth,” you said through your teeth, so mad, so hot, so done with it all. He just chuckled again, raising his eyebrows, you were starting to just want his attention, wanting him to reciprocate your anger, not caring how you got there.
“And by the way, I don't care how you see it, I've been up all morning slaving away at something I am certainly not paid for and I don't even get a thank you?” You blurted out, the words falling out of you, you convinced yourself you felt sweat actually drip from your chin.
He turned to you, annoyingly amused, but there was something else, an underlying rage that really disrupted the usual sedate presence he provided. “Thank you?” He smirked, quirking an eyebrow.
You paused, never had you ever felt so damn angry at a man. “Listen up-” you began with a huff before being interrupted by Joel stalking over to you with a hostile smirk on his face. Towering over you even though you were a similar height, you backed up against his desk very slightly, trying to keep your chin raised cockily.
“Are you always this fuckin’ cranky?” he shook his head in amused disbelief and let out an exasperated scoff at the stuttering look on your face.
You could feel your heart beating like that of a hamster, hammering against your chest. He was so close you could smell him, old spice deodorant, campfires, the slightest tang of sweat and lake water, also the musty dust smell of the shack, you thought you might faint like some Victorian chick.
He was close, too close for comfort, his muscular frame, the threat of a non-sedate Joel wasn't something that settled you. You gazed into those eyes of his, narrow and all-seeing under a thick, heavy brow. “How’re we gonna cheer you up, huh kiddo?” He raised his eyebrows in mock concern, your mouth was left agape, eyes so wide they might pop. Joel was closer now, looking down at her very slightly, his breath fanned over her face. Holy fuck.
“Can’t have you all bitchy after doin’ me one little task, now can we?” He said after a beat, placing his hand on your jaw, wiping away a caked bit of dirt, probably from all that ‘hard labour,’ his big thumb moved from your jaw to swipe across your lips softly, gently feeling the plush, pillowy skin, freshly chapstick-ed from the Carmex in your pocket. “Can we, sugar?” he repeated the rhetorical question down at you. She shook her head lightly, the obedience hitting her like a 10 foot wave.
“That's better, that's it, that's better,” He said softly, like he was talking to a jumpy animal. “Not so hard being a nice girl is it now? Not so bad?” he cocked his head and raised her brow, she shook her head absentmindedly once more, completely entranced by whatever was happening to her right here against Joel's desk.
He nodded, his hand darting between your teeth, his other fingers holding your jaw still underneath. The other hand rested precariously on your thigh, leaning closer so you were sat up on the desk, right beside the dirty mag.
He let his hand trace drowsy circled under the hem of your shorts, his eyes following, “Think you're cute?” he smirked, his eyes told a different story, taunting, stormy. “walkin' round in those little damn shorts, all prissy, like you own the place?” He said darkly, almost to yourself, holding your eyes with his, his thumb swiping between your teeth, pressing the pad against your tongue. “Suck,” You did it straight away, hollowing your cheeks out and letting whatever this was happen.
You convinced yourself it was some kind of gross fever dream, being out in the heat for the last few days had given you hallucinations, but it felt real, the taste was real on your tongue, his taste. you lapped it up like medicine.
He clenched his jaw and gazed at your lips wrapping around his thick thumb, fuck. His fingers grazed the seam of your bikini bottoms under your shorts, he could already feel how warm you were down there, how much this was getting to you. He held eye contact with you as he pulled your shorts off, motioning for you to lift your ass, you were feeling compliant, a rare feeling.
Your bikini bottoms followed, leaving you bare on the desk, the lifeguard top riding up your midriff revealing your glistening (very 70s (interpret that however you like)) cunt to the daylight that streamed in through the open door - a risk Joel seemed to be taking, or something he probably hadn't even considered.
He rolled his neck, his hands on his hips, he seemed to be considering his options, weighing up the consequences. You pushed your knees together, hoping for a little modesty, the answer was no as Joel's big hands reached down and parted your legs once again.
“Ah, ah, baby,” he smirked wildly, truly a man starved. He reached down and dragged his finger between your folds, holding the wet digit to the light. It was all achingly slow, he sucked his finger clean, his eyes on yours as he tasted you, letting out a gruff, guttural groan.
“This gonna keep you sweet?” he said with an icy smirk, her skin was like a furnace; a sweaty, wet, flustered, confused puddle on this desk, dripping everywhere. “Keep you outta my way for a couple days maybe, kiddo?” He chuckled, looking at her domineeringly. “How’s that sound?”
You nodded eagerly, your expression desperate, whiny, you needed this bad. “When you touch yourself, whadd’ya think 'bout?” he taunted, leaning a hand either side of your hips on the desk, “You,” you gave in, it was just too easy when he talked to you like that.
“Show me,” He smirked, his words almost a growl, you raised your eyebrows. “Your a pretty little idiot aren'cha?” Now he was just being mean. “Touch yourself the way you do when you're in your cabin, up in your bunk, squirmin’ around,”
It was so easy, to let him order you around, to succumb to it. The heat, all the bantering, it had melted you into putty in his hands, it’d get to anyone. So there you were, on Joel Miller's desk, bare on the bottom half, your hand drawing tight circles around your aching clit.
“Fuck,” you bit down on your lip, it was all overwhelming, the feeling of an orgasm coiling around your spine, the blistering, green-house-type heat that had you all rosy and sweaty, the fact that Joel was stood right there, crossing his arms, watching you like a hawk. You knew he’d be a voyeur.
You watched as his wire snapped and he’d had enough of just watching, adjusting the tent in his shorts. He knelt down in front of you, his eyes looking bigger than usual from this angle, wilder almost feral. he pulled at your hips violently, hoisting you around so your back was flat against the desk, your head leant up against the wall so you could watch exactly what he was going to do to you.
His mouth was hot against you, licking a stripe up your seam. You could’ve sworn you heard him moan at the taste, felt the vibrations against your core. “This cunt is wasted on Keenan,” He chuckled, not even pulling away from you to lay his jab at Billy, he never could resist the chance.
You moaned loudly, your hair flying into his hair, feeling the chocolatey, salt and pepper ends in your fingers and you pulled hard, close now. “Don’t fucking stop,” you whimpered, grinding your hips against his face, nose deep in your pussy.
“Fuck, does he kiss it this good, doll?” He murmured, the vibrations of his baritone drawl against your aching clit were enough to make you toss your head back in sheer ecstasy, that coil winding uncomfortably tight, threatening to snap.
“He doesn't.” you chuckled through moans, Billy had never ever eaten you out, no matter how many killer blowies you’d served to him on a silver platter. This seemed to appal Joel, who only licked deeper, slower against you, it was agonisingly good, toe curling. He scoffed down there, his thick index finger working at your hole now, dipping in easily despite how tight you were.
“Poor thing, thas’ why you're so wound up,” He mewled from below, his voice patronising, taunting, but it touched you, “haven’t had someone take care of this pretty cunt in too long hmm? shit, I’d be mean too.” He said with a wet smirk, pulling away to slot another finger in, but you wouldn't give. “Won’t be able to take my cock if you can take two fingers down here,” He chuckled, taunting you further.
“Please don't stop Joel,” you squealed, pulling his hair painfully tight between your fingers, his condescending words only making you hotter, you weren’t usually into that, but shit, Joel could be wearing a fucking tutu and you’d be into it, come to think of it…
He was grinning smugly as he pushed his fingers into you at a gruelling pace, the desk shook underneath you, your head thrown back against the wall. “Billy hasn't done me any damn favours down here, you're tight as a virgin, baby,” you could see the smirk on his stupid face even with your eyes clenched shut.
Your release hit harder than it ever had before, your leg shook hard, a string of ‘fuck’s and ‘holy shit’s, laced with a fair pinch of ‘Joel’s and ‘baby’s, blurted out of your lips, you felt your abdomen clench and moaned incoherently, but Joel wasn't quitting, still kitten licking at your inflamed core, fingers curling up and into you, finding a new depth with every push.
“Joel stop, it-its,” you panted, not even recognising your own voice now, your vision blurred. Overstimulated didn't even sum it up, that shit hurt.
He didn't care, lost in your taste, lost in the feeling of you clenching around his digits. “Cocky little lifeguard, you're the bane of my life, you know that sweetie?” He said against your wetness, not giving a flying fuck how uncomfortable this was getting, knowing soon you’d ride it into another earth-eating orgasm.
“Really shouldn't be doin’ this with’ya, Can’t be,” He said over your moans as the discomfort bled into insatiable pleasure, the desk hard against your clammy ass, your release leaking down your thigh and pooling below you. “Holy fuck-” you squealed, your hand on his shoulder to stop yourself from collapsing, the other interwined in his thick hair, that must’ve hurt.
“How old even are you?” he asked with a mischievous chuckle, pulling his face away and slowing his hand movements, no no no no no. Your brain was fuzzy, all you could process was that Joel had stopped and that felt like death. “20,” She said quickly, needing him to continue. He knew what he was doing, taking a moment to process, watching the way you were squirming, so desperate for him yet again.
“You're too young for me, kiddo,” He said as he dove back into your crotch, a very contradictory statement when reflected against his actions so far this morning, i know. “I am not,” you bit back through a whimper, pouting, your eyes fluttering shut once again.
“How old’re you anyways,” you panted, your words all broken and high pitched, too fucked-out to feel humiliated. “76?” You chuckled, feeling your second orgasm of the morning chasing after you.
He bit down ever so slightly on your clit, causing you to wince and buck your hips, it didn't cause any damage or hurt, just hard enough to shut your bratty ass up. “49, missy,” he replied coldly from below you. “Watch it,”
“You wanna take my 76 year old cock next? think you can take it?” He smirked, pulling away to focus on his hand movements, in and out, hitting that spongy part of you, deeper than you could ever get. You nodded, words almost escaping you for the first time in your smart-ass life. He chuckled deeply at this, a hearty sound you were starting to crave like a meth-head. “She’s a trooper, ain’t she?” He breathed in your ear, planting a small, firm kiss on your neck, his fingers gaining a bruising pace, loud wails escaping your quivering lips.
“Fuck j-joel,” you stammered, your hot breath fanning against his neck, “want, need your cock,” you were getting needy, washed up by the incoming wave of your orgasm, ready to hit just as hard as before, if that was physically possible. “Don't get greedy now,” He smirked down at you, eyes wild. Hot tears were rolling down your cheeks, salty and stinging, your body shaking, giving way to another tortuous release.
He pulled his hand away and sucked eagerly at his drenched fingers, watching as you came apart on the desk, moaning and whining for him.
He sat you up, grabbing a coke from his outdoor refrigerator and leaning against it as he opened it, muscles flexing he clicked it open, tossing the bottle opener to the side and handing it to you. You grasped it with clammy palms, your vision slowly coming back, your body still fucked-out and trembling, cock-dumb for a cock you hadn't even had.
“Welp,” He put his hands on his hips, like some suburban dad done with a barbecue, “that was real nice, weren't it?” He patted you on the shoulder, ignoring the bewildered expression on your face.
“Duty calls, kids’ll be down here in an hour or so,” he slapped his thighs and raised his eyebrows, it was as if he’d just given you a friendly handshake, not eaten you out and made you cum twice.
“Aren’t you going to..” you stopped yourself, you’d been awaiting the next round, (even if you weren't sure you could take another round) the one he’d talked about with that same smug look on his face as he finger-fucked you.
He grinned down at her, ruffling your hair, “another time hey kiddo?” he said kindly, but it was perhaps the furthest thing from kind you’d ever seen. You glared up at him in disbelief, mouth agape, cheeks rosy, skin glassy from tears of pleasure, you didn't even know that was a thing. He patted you on the shoulder, smiling earnestly, that glint of mischief turned to one of absolute cruelty in his eyes.
“Atta’ girl.”
And he was gone. Joel was out the door as quickly as he’d entered, leaving you panting, bottomless and flushed and sweaty, your shorts half way across the room, the coke bottle dampening your fingers.
He’d really done a number on you, gotten you all needy and riled up, then done something to you that no one had ever bothered with. Then he’d just left, like it wasn't the best you’d ever felt, like you hadn't been imagining how many babies you were going to give him, what colour flowers’d be in your bouquet at the wedding.
It was embarrassing; being humiliated yet a-fucking-gain by a man well over twice your age, legs trembling on the soaked desk, the model on the front of his porno magazine beside you grinning up at you smugly, fucking bitch.
#pedro pascal#girlblogging#joel miller#1970s#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller tlou#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#lana del rey#enemies to lovers#mean!joel#perv!joel#wowowowowoww
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Anyway you can do Cal and Andre NSFW threesome headcannon?
🎀 Andre Kriegman and Calvin Gabriel SFW and NSFW headcannons 🎀
SFW
Andre and Cal are VERY obsessed with their “partner” I mean at first they called you their partner but tbh you barely even knew they existed until you found out Andre was like stalking you in the halls with cal anyways that’s besides the point.
Andre and Cal are VERY VERY protective like very even though you might not be with them YET doesn’t mean they will not protect you.
Once you do get with them there’s like no going back Andre is very good at gaslighting you while cal can manipulate THE SHIT outta you. (I’m sorry boo but they crazy)
The relationship can be kinda toxic at times but let’s be honest you love it and they always want to hang out with you if you aren’t in a room with them or at least not telling them where you are they will start to tweak or some shit.
Cal glares or gives them THAT stare when someone looks your way or even his or Andre’s like he wants everyone to fuck off EVERYONE.
Andre stares into peoples souls when they look your way this man WILL NOT look away until that person leaves he’s scary like that.
The cuddles are kinda the best tho y’all will just lay and talk about stupid stuff playing with Andre’s or cals hair or them doing that to yours holding hands sandwiched together type shit.
Andre and Cal again both are very controlling of your life like what you wear who you talk to because they feel like they have the right and can but ofc ur gunna listen to them I mean two hot guys like telling you what to do I mean..anyways
Andre doesn’t like you hanging out WITH ANY guy unless it’s family or some shit but that’s obvious even if it’s just a friend he would be so pissed he’d be so jealous he’s insecure asf.
Cal on the other I feel would be jealous but wouldn’t try and get in the way at first just glare at him.
NSFW
Cal is VERY impulsive like he will do new things on the spot but if you try something with him istg he will bite you he’s weird like that but you love him so Andre’s the same but he won’t bite you…he’d do more than that…
Andre on the other hand really likes you to suck his dick while cal fucks you from behind it makes him smile and laugh a bit
Andre LOVES to explore your body even sometimes cals body but he loves it no matter how much he’s done it before he loves it Cal likes the feeling of someone’s hands on him weather it be yours or Andre’s or better BOTH it makes him lowkey smile it looks cute and innocent oh but dear lord he is NAWT.
A lot of the times when you guys can’t hang out with each other or got stuff to do or your parents just simply say no to sleepovers y’all have phone sex A LOT and it’s kinda just exactly how it sounds…
Cal is a switch but mostly a top but sometimes when he is just too tired to do shit like after school or some shit or high something like that he’d let you do whatever Andre on the other hand is a full ass top this man would pin you up against the wall and MAKE you take it I’m sorry he’s rlly crazy he just hates being a bottom makes him feel like he’s small or some shit he wants to be like “a tough man” some stupid shit like that
They also the type to argue who gets to fuck you first.
OKAY THATS ALL I GOTS 4 NOW I AM IN SCHOOL SO SORRY IF THEY ARE SHITTY 😭😭❤️
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hey angel, I don’t know if you take song requests but I was thinking about an imagine with jj based on the song ‘I Know You’ by Faye Webster? I’m obsessed with it 🫶
totally okay if not ml !!
i know you
pairing(s): jj maybank x reader, jj maybank x kiara carrera
warnings: its lowkey sad, jj is distant, not so happy ending??
summary: you realize part of jj will always belong to someone else.
authors note: guys. my motivation has been at zero. i hope you guys enjoy this though. thank you so much for the request!!
not edited
do not copy my works. i do not condone rewrites, translations, or edited versions. all my content is my content that i wrote.
not my gif
you’re holding me and holding back
you were laying in your bed, jj sitting beside you against your headboard. your head was resting in his lap but what really struck you the wrong way, was the fact that his ringed fingers that were typically running through your hair, were now stiff at his sides.
i don’t really care for that
so instead, you sat up beside him and sighed. he immediately turned his head to you with a raised brow. “why’d you move?”
just you
“you’re not even paying attention to me, jj,” you said, staring ahead at the movie playing on your tv.
theres a pause between every minute
his hand reached over to take yours as he stopped for a second to think. “i’m sorry, baby. i’ve just been stressed lately.”
“about what?” you questioned, not understanding his point. “you don’t tell me anything anymore.”
feelin’ like i need something
“i miss you, jj,” you admitted sadly. “i barely see you anymore, you barely come over, text me, call me, anything. it doesn’t even feel like we’re in a relationship anymore.”
it’s just you
he used his hold on your hand to pull you into him, wrapping his arms around you in a hug. “i’m sorry, angel.”
i know, i know
he said this every time. yet nothing ever truly changed. he always distanced himself from you, then randomly came back in bursts of affection.
i know, i know
you always knew this was coming. you always knew he’d run to john b or kiara, then suddenly come back to you when he needed something.
you
you were so in love with him that you knew you’d never leave him.
you
jj was it in your eyes. you weren’t too sure if he felt the same though.
i know, i know
“hey, can you look at me sweetheart.” he knew that look too well.
i know, i know
he knew exactly what was on your mind. he just felt so bad that he made you feel like that.
you
he wrapped an arm behind your shoulders, knowing it calmed you in some way.
you
he knew you were upset with him. he wanted nothing more to just fix it, to have his old relationship back… to have his old self back. like how it was when you first started dating.
i’ll quiet down if thats what you want
so here you were, at the chateau with all of your friends around you. you were cuddled into jj’s side, choosing not to engage in the conversation. he didn’t listen to you anyway.
i understand i’m not the only one
you knew he was distracted. he always was. his attention was never fully on you.
for you
it was also on kiara. you saw the way he looked at her.
so tell me what you’re looking for
you really just wished he’d come clean and tell you how he really felt.
is it a picture perfect girl for you?
you weren’t even mad. kiara was gorgeous. she was absolutely perfect in every single way imaginable.
i know, i know
you knew sooner or later he’d realize.
i know, i know
you knew he could find better with her.
you
you knew how he thought.
you
you knew he was already half there.
i know, i know
jj dug his hand into your waist, looking down at you with a worried expression. he knew you often tended to zone out. “you still with me?”
i know, i know
when you nodded, he just knew you were lying.
you
he knew you too well.
you
he knew when something was up.
i’m here regardless of the pain
as much as it hurt you to know your boyfriend was in love with someone else, you didn’t want it to end. you just wanted to be with him.
don’t ever tell me to go away from you
you prayed he wouldn’t leave you, or tell you to do that to him. you wouldn’t be able to.
when we’re old and have to leave the earth
even if something did happen, you’d never forget this.
i’ll still remember all i’ve learned from you
maybe there was some truth to remembering your first love because you knew you’d never be able to fully let jj go.
i know, i know
“hey,” the blonde said softly when he noticed you zoning out in the car again on the way to his house from the chateau. “what’s up?”
i know, i know
he just knew you too well.
you
“it’s jus’ you and me, angel. forever jus’ you and me.”
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waittt I lowkey need to hear more about christian cult member armand turning journalist daniel into his new husbandfather au...
okay it gets kinda long but
•armands in a cult that marius & santino run & hes being groomed i mean trained to be the leader when they die & when hes old enough will marry one to bear his successor etc
•armand is trans in this au its pretty important
•as such hes been raised with really strict ideas regarding sexual purity & behavior & his relationship to other men because hes still 'technically a woman' (hes allowed to cut his hair & be called by his preferred name n pronouns but cant really transition otherwise
•daniel shows up because hes writing an article about cults or whatever
•daniel meets armand through the investigation & armands been raised in this super strict hypercelibate culture after marius 'adopted' him on a 'missionary trip' where its fine if marius fucks him because hes his father :) the spiritual head of the household :) & will pick out a husband for darling armand one day :) daniel i hope its you
•daniels article gets published & the cult is disbanded
•armand fr Doesnt know any other people so hes like daniel :( can you be my guardian now :( & daniels like okay sure til you find a job & house & whatnot
•armand moves in with daniel night one is confused because daniel gave him his own room & wont hover around monitoring what he does & doesnt make him read the bible or aristotle before he goes to bed & isnt touching him
•armand starts freaking out because he went from this tightly knit religious group very strict rules & guidelines & hes like i need someone to tell me what to do what am i doing wrong why do i not have commandments to memorize
•daniel realizes he may have made a mistake agreeing to be armands guardian because now he has this grown adult man sitting beside him in bed shaking & sobbing & asking daniel to absolve him of his sins & daniel did NOT sign up for that!
•like i cannot emphasize enough how much armand at this point does not have a basis for 'normal' behavior because hes been groomed to be so entirely dependent upon what his 'guardian' says & danie is very conflicted because 1) he doesnt wanna just be a replacement for the cult 2) armand is really really hot & basically just told daniel he can use him uowever he wants & follow all his rules & GOD does daniel really want to fuck him
•through herculean effort daniel doesnt fuck him even though armand asks him to do these 'rituals' to 'ensure his purity & route to heaven' (read: checking to make sure hes still a virgin, sending him to other 'leaders' to have sex with, etc)
•you know those cards ppl have that are like. pledging yr virginity to God til marriage. armand has one of those but it didnt count whem its his religious leaders bc thats how cults work
•'how can he be a virgin but have still had sex w marius' backdoor doesnt count
•anyway armand learning about modern life & culture he gets a library card & starts testosterone he still really wants daniel to fuck him & daniel lets him cuddle him & get handsy cause it grounds him & its getting really hard not to but daniel doesnt know if he actually wants to hit or just expects him to to fulfil his duties
•gets caught jerking off to daniels boxers
•daniel realizes Oh This Kid Is A Grade A Freak even outside of the cult
•they do end up having sex eventually but the burn is SLOW as FUCK & theres sooo much sexual tension & conflict
•oh yeah armand has a therapist named barbara
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TSUKIHIME FASHION REVIEW 4!!!!
hello hello everyone
*insert applause here*
i totally haven't been dealing with some severe writers block for this relatively improvised series of rants no way i just been uhh climbing a.... spiritual mountain! yes! that is it!
i strongly suggest everyone climb their own spiritual mountains it really helps clear *things* up
uh yea whatever
so today we will be returning to the much awaited tsukihime fashion review with the one and only CIEL so go whip up some good ole curry and read along for this rant breakdown of ciel's designs evolution throughout the years.
CIEL
just look at her for a second and reconsider your life choices? have you done your homework today? (if not please go do it thats very uncool) have you returned your library books? have you tied your shoe laces? thats the vibe im getting from her in this pic
suddenly she hits you with this look and its like ugh i could go to war for much less. i could take on maybe a dead apostle or two or even a dead apostle ancestor. sure i'd die but what is death in front of curry senpai amirite? im suuuuuuure she would appreciate that sentiment
on a serious note tho she actually is adorable as hell and i can't believe i only literally just noticed that. the hair especially is to die for.
Takeuchi bless his heart really nailed that cute older student vibe he so sought for
wait wrong pic
now THIS is raw as hell. pure peak 90s edge. i imagine takeuchi was literally sitting on the edge of a blade on the edge of a cliff on the edge of the world.... well theres one more edge joke here but ill leave it be point is this is edgy and i lowkey love it.
i used to feel somewhat indifferent to the design here especially concerning the tattoos which i think i still am. the biggest issue with the tattoos for me specifically the angel wings is simply they aren't symmetrical and thus look bad according to me but everything else is chefs kiss
i talked about this in the roa post but like wtf is wrong with roa man... first thing he does is strip down is bro ok? why does he do this? what does he gain? freak.
CIEL REMAKE
excuse the border im literally copy pastin here ANYWAYs yea idk how i feel about the remake ciel at all tbh to the point that i considered accidentally forgetting this section
its like they brought up her cuteness factor by 100 points in exchange of any edge whatsoever
she got sanitized damn it
SANITIZED
don't get me wrong i still find her cute but GODDAMN where is the edge? where is the allure? i bet she wouldn't ask "Glasses or no glasses" OH WAIT THEY TOOK THAT TOO!! why can't ciel have a good thing in peace... they took away the roa boner yall...
its kinda meh to me overall
again ignore the large size i cba to find a smaller pic rn
yk what she looks dope here so ill allow it. i may be feeling things rn actually its weird because i have never really been a ciel fan but now im gushing over her... huh strange
no comment besides omg hot
ANYWAYS thats all i have to say about ciel
i like her og design much better then the remake because i feel it was very hmmm distinctive is the word i would use.
the remake makes her look much more generic in a sense especially concerning the hair
overall i would say the remake really went for a slightly more generic look in the hair department and i aint really a tm boomer or anything but it is such a shame
thats all i have again so cya folks
remember to read tsukihime right the fuck now or else....
#type moon#tsukihime#ciel#read tsukihime#tag#yea that was just a tag#hm#hmm#hmmmmm#tsuki fashion review#kiku rants
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HAIII i miss going thru ur posts pleek I WAS SO SICK FOR DAAAAAYS but also i went to p1harmony concert n it was #AMAZING 🤭 (except for the person in front of me who kept blocking my view w their gawdamn phone !)
anyway! namjoon in 'bro?' oh mygawd im gonna combust i wish he was real hes so adorable i need him beside me rn. U JUSY GET IT. you get his vibes and energy like!! im a firm believer too rhat thats how he replies n shit 🤞 i might js be rlly insane and obsessed w him But i rlly do hear him / imagine his expressions with the way u write him ?!? it's just so ON POINT every single time 😭🙏
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY JOONBUG EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HIM OR IM GONNA HUNT EVERYONES BLOODLINE RAHHHHHHH 👹👹👹👹
i love u 4ever Like. im so srs when i say that reading ur silly stuff b4 going to sleep puts a smile on my face! ^3^
as always, joon & ur biggest fan 😘
STOP IM SOSOSOSOSO JEALOUS PIWON ARE LITERALLY MY FUCKING ULTS IM GONNA KMS UR SO LUCKY WOW. I BET IT WAS SO GREAT SO HAPPY FOR U BFF
hehehehehe ty my love i was lowkey was feeling a bit off? about how i write joon but you just know how to make me blush giggle and inflate my ego it’s like ur in my head. whenever i write joon from now on will have you in my mind >3<
HAPPY FUCKING JOON DAY OH MY GOD WOOP WOOP HAVE TO KISS HIM ON THE MOUTH
i love you to the moon and back kisses for you x10 i appreciate you always <3333
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manga ep2 big post part 2/?
this art style is kind of crazy ANYWAY. Ughhhhh. Somehow this too is about yasuda gender. Its so. Endless gender for the endless witch
Made jessica cry. Jessica im so sorry
completely forgot this is like A Rosa Episode lowkey ouhhhhh In the end. I love her too. But thats just because i can see...
COLOREEEED PRETTYYY oh shannon kanon counter but its just them and genji too
she said witch beatrice shes so fun i love her another fave-since-ep1 for sure
Keeping an eye on her and genji as well. Ugh. And nanjo too.
Hardest two in all of life <- i typed this sentence then looked away from the puter to talk to family for 2 secs and looked back and realised it doesnt make any fucking sense but i agree
Whys this art style making him look crazy cool well hes cool in ryukishi too but its like lame-cool this is like well i dont know
most normal girl ever
thank god for the love that i can see with because she is so evil. maybe its pretty privilege too Oh but rosas pretty and yet i hated her at one point. Idk something about eva is just. Ughhh
NOT sure about her btw im interpreting it as yasuda playing with her and marias fun and kanon here is kinda just hoping to get a perspective But also could be a lot of her doing play-pretend based on like A few interactions. I have to take a big look at mariage sorciere when its more relevant i mean itll be talked here but other eps too
BADDIE. Why i kinda like this style so much?!!!? Anyway easy to explain why rosa can see her (yasuda felt bad for little maria and dressing up. ill have to look but that might be the distinction between the two outfits)
Study door handle burned her hand i guess its because kinzo shouldnt be seen right now
SHES MENTIONING HOW KANON DOESNT HAVE TO BE FURNITURE ANYMORE I FORGOT ABOUT ALL OF THAT SHE KEPT PROMISING IT BUT I NEVER REALLY UNDERSTOOD. OH MAN
Exact same rank...
Lol gohda is so. Such an inoffensive character all in all? He does NOTHING for us. Or maybe i just dont have the love to see it. Like what his role is in the big picture. Hes just there. I dont think thats a bad thing though
Its so fucking good. Makes you wonder though. About genji kumasawa and even nanjos motivation to let her do her thing... Because kinzos supposedly already dead, are they really so loyal to give him his "redemption" despite that...
He says he never met her though and he doesnt think they had a child. Ugh.
maria keeps saying crazy things shes so funny light of the party
sayo. Ohmmmmm. I think the translation team changed cos the other one had her tell him her name is kiyo no? yeah i checked she definitely told him that. thats interesting
shes so funny i love her sense of humor its so great. Anyway one of the most iconic scenes in this ep commence
shes sleeping guys no shes meditating
girlslove
u crazy
I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BEING HERE OH MY GODDDDDD OK OK OK OK
i remember being a little confused when i first read on why tf they were focusing so much on the locked rooms but thats the thing now. and besides how else would u approach it well i dont know
its all about the closed rooms and the closed (cat)boxes etc
i need her . When her demeanor and appearance are partially specifically tailored for battler to like her Well call me battler cos it works. It does make u feel a bit bad though doesnt it
he doesnt like the rule though hes all zen zen dame da about it
shes got the gun and shit shes taking chargeeeeee.... queen
oh hell show UP ALRIGHT seriously one of my fav scenes to this day and this is like what ep 2
eughhhhhhh ughhhhh uhghhhhghghh well Yyeah To be fair with the truth and all im still not sure how it was done something something kumasawa or whatever its conceivable
they draw her so strange (good)
Omg its just like ep6
GIRLSLOVE
battler asked rosa how she can prove shes not a wolf Ohhhh girl. Hey maria. Im going to be the father that stepped up
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Dear Star Child, if this letter could see it's way to Idia Shroud, I would be most grateful. If you could get the gummy sharks to Idia I would be very happy, but the rest of the sweets are for you ^w^
Dear Idia Shroud,
Wow, it has been a while since I've written a letter that's not for school. Nvm, I have never written a letter outside of school; guess I'm finally putting that knowledge to use… Oh where to to begin, I'm rlly bad at doing the whole social thing yet if you would let me I'd be yapping on for eternity but luckily this is a letter and I have to condense it.
Well, Happy New Year! How the sale going? From what I can see into your world it looks amazing especially Ortho's gear. I'm always so impressed that someone was able to make a robotic body that ranged in movement-- here it feels like we just barely started to touch on robotics here, yet you are designing outfits for Ortho like it's nothing. Honest question, did you bless me with luck for the gacha or something did you know I fell like right when the clock hit midnight or someth, but srsly getting three SSRs without even indenting on getting them is something? I had to get a blessing from you or something. My irl would say that is a blessing from you… they have said "At this point I'm scared your obsession with Idia will transport you into the game" well I do wi Imagine if that happened? I don't even know what I would do? I think I would miss my friends but idk if they would miss me.
ANYWAYS, thats sad, moving on. I could have actually missed all of this I could have been boring and sad and still stuck on my utdr phase. Though it wouldn't be too bad Undertale and Deltarune still have th- WAIT YOU ARE A PURE SOUL-- FREE FROM UNDERTALE SPOILERS. Well I know whats happening if I ever get isekai'd. Gosh I would love to actually sit beside you and watch you play games. It's almost fascinating watching someone who is good at games play… Ehe.. I rlly don't know how to end this? Thx for existing please continue to do that.
P.S. Rlly srry for an typos, I wrote this at like 3 am cause I woke up n couldn't go back to sleep.
~ Your moonlight
(HELP ITS 4:30)
oh I LOVE THE BLUE THEME!! had a bit of oopsie delivering this letter but it's all good!! ( ^-^)/ *
Hey Moonlight.
Ugh nvm that sounds cringe please ignore that-- You know I'm not good with this thing either, so I'm gonna ramble if you don't mind. (I hope you don't or it'd be so embarrasing hhhhhhh)
I guess because of our worlds' differences that you'd find Ortho's gears impressive. I mean, I still do, and he's my brother now, he's gotta have the best tech to accomodate his needs. Your world sounds lowkey slow if they haven't even scratched the basics of robotics yet. Still I gotta hand it to them for making a kinda gateway connecting our worlds together.
YOU GOT? THREE?? SSR CARDS OF ME??? IS THAT WHY I KEPT FAILING GACHA EVENTS?? BC MY LUCK WENT TO YOU???? /j but congrats ig. Hope my cards been helping you through the game(?) By the Sevens, that is so weird knowing that I'm just a game character in your world.
But anywho, ignoring that blatant spoiler of fandoms I've never heard of before, for some reasons, I don't exactly mind having someone like you playing games with me beside Ortho. Maybe it'd be easier to breathe than going out and socialise with normies ugh.
Help how do I end a letter Happy New Year, may you be blessed with luck through the gacha system ig.
Idia Shroud
tags: @identity-theft-101 @twistwonderlanddevotee @ameleii @vioisgoinginsane @ferris-thewheel
remember to reblog if you enjoy my works!! ^-^
#irene's writings ♡#twst#twisted wonderland#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twst fluff#twisted wonderland fluff#idia shroud#twst idia#twisted wonderland idia#idia#idia shroud x reader#twst idia x reader#idia x reader#idia shroud fluff#letters from the stars 🌠
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its a journey, not a race. i have to feel this way to move on.
what do i want to gain from telling my sisters about this? or my mum? what could they tell me that would help?
all i truly want to hear is that i should listen to my heart and go back to him. that he really was one of a kind, and that i wont find another like him. but the reality is im still 22, and i havent even met anyone besides him, because i wont let go of him. i dont want to let go of him! i want him back. i want what we had back. i want to feel that kind of love and attraction for someone again. because so far, i havent found a single person who can aggravate and excite me all at once the way he did. that could make me genuinely LAUGH the way he did. that made me feel safe and cared for like he did. ugh. is it true that i felt this way? am i making it all up to feed into my delusions? its so tiring being this way. its like the only thing that would make it end is to simply do it. to actually unblock him, add him, send him a dm, and get to the bottom of it myself. to put my pride aside, and risk rejection, all to hear from him again. to relight that connection. to somehow get the answers that i seek. what answers? that he still wants me? but do i still want him? who even is he, now...? is that what it is? the lack of knowing? i want him to still belong to me, even when i dont want to be together. i have the audacity to think he owes that loyalty to me years after i left him.
i want to know if he still has any kind of feelings for me. do you still think about me as often as i do? does it make you sad? does it make you miss me? does it make you nostalgic, or do you want it back? do you wish things went differently...? do you wonder, maybe, things could be different now, if we tried again?
i wish we could get to know eachother all over again without it feeling wrong. i wish we could start again without feeling like its a mistake. i wish that i was right in thinking you were the one for me all along.
i used to think we'd be together forever. that we'd have kids together.
did you secretly expect us to break up too? or did you want us to be together forever? because somehow i wanted both at once.
well. anyway, the point of all this is this. i still cant get you off my mind. so, you did win. if there was anyone who won, it was always you. you got me, you got the experience of a girlfriend, you had the character development of dating a girl like me. we learnt from eachother but you get to take that knowledge and now find a new girl to charm and love better than you ever did for me. and after all my fighting and anger and resentment, now i cant go a day without remembering you and the amazing love we shared and the memories we have together. ugh. ew. im so sappy and pathetic.
i dont know if it would be satisfying or heartbreaking to know that you still think about me to, or miss me. it would be even more heartbreaking to know you didn't.
i know youre happy now and that makes me happy and proud of you. you honestly might be doing a lot better than me mentally now. thats so impressive. you have a good circle of friends, youre living your best life and having fun and you moved forward instead of backward. that change is so heartwarming for me.
it irritates me that youre a tradie now. did you do that on purpose, cause i find them so hot? do you know how bad that makes me crave you? my body hasnt forgotten the things you did to me... lol. thats fucked up and lowkey weird. we broke up a long time ago and we were still very young.
i wonder how much better youd be now. i wonder how many girls youve slept with now? i hope they were good. my body count went up but for no good reason. they were all terrible and never made me cum. what a waste of my body. another massive regret.
anyway. i wonder how you'd react if you actually knew i felt this way about you. if you read everything i just wrote... would you feel bad for me? or would it spark something in you, a memory, and hope, that maybe its worth trying again. or has too much time passed, and too much has happened between us, that it simply wouldnt make sense anymore?
ive tried and tried to reconnect with old friends from the past. even the ones who i left on good terms with, we just cant seem to click anymore. we changed and outgrew eachother. and they remind me too much of the past, and the pain of grieving that time and that old me is too much, and it makes it too hard to see her anymore.
maybe weve changed so much, and the trust has faded so far, that even if we were to reconnect, wed inevitably lose eachother again anyway. would that hurt more? perhaps its best to leave the memory untouched where it is, and not meddle with what we had, by replacing it with newly failed attempts of rekindling things.
ugh.
i always come back to the same conclusion. and thats good! its consistent, and its healthy, and its right, and it helps me to stay on gods path. but its so exhausting going round in this circle so much. when can i be given a break? when can this addiction end? who is holding onto who at this point? is it venus retrograde? this whole time ive been blaming my emotions on venus. but every now and then i wonder if its him manifesting himself into my mind by thinking about me to.
EXCUSE ME! IF YOU ARE HEARING ME RIGHT NOW, WOULD YOU PLEASE GIVE ME A BREAK? I DONT WANT TO IMAGINE YOU ALL HOT AND SWEATY IN YOUR WORK UNIFORM AFTER A DAYS WORK. I DONT LIKE IMAGINING YOU LAUGHING AND MESSING AROUND WITH YOUR FRIENDS. I DONT ENJOY MISSING A PERSON WHO DOESNT EXIST. SO PLEASE STOP THINKING ABOUT ME AND MANIFESTING IN MY MIND! ITS EXHAUSTING. I NEED A BREAK TO FIND SOMETHING REAL AND TANGIBLE, THANKS.
i am so fucking delusional and need professional help. thats all
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omg this is the best lyric video i’ve ever seen in my life
LOONA meets LEAGUE OF LEGENDS
#lowkey makes me wanna play league but i dont have a windows pc#also i cant even play overwatch why do i wanna play league at my current schedule lol#but anyway thats beside the point#loona#butterfly
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Anyways thinking of that struggle where you learn a language but it doesnt cover stuff like regional dialects or accents or how fast the people actually speak it and stuff like slang
And mentally applying it to the traveler at the beginning of genshin right as they first end up going to Mondstadt.
#anyways lowkey wanna make a new account purely cause i miss exploring in the beginning#like it actually felt meaningful to run around cause thats how you got a lot of your stuff#like i find some meaning now but it feels kinda empty kinda like whats the point of running around besides getting chests#genshin impact
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maybe you should talk it out with him? it might make both of you feel better to get things in the open
i 100% agree and i was hoping it could be that easy but. :/ just recently i left him like a minutes long voicemail TRYING to start this conversation (we only see each other once a week) and. man this guy is Really not up for accountability. i explicitly said "i really hope youre not about to play dumb about this" and apart of his like two sentence response via text was "[im] not sure what i would be "playing dumb about"" so. :/ this is gonna be Even tougher than i was expecting
#that one crush situation lol#though he did lowkey give himself away in saying that thats another explanation.#though. the whole thing Did have an air of confrontation to it tbh. like i GET that#i was feeling tored and just wanting some closure but naturally - and especially through a phone - like. man i probably sounded PISSED#which like. i am#and like 3 sentences into talking i realized woahhh i gotta real this in i sound like i wanna kick his ass#which i DO but thats beside the point when youre TRYING to reach a mutual understaninf with someone yk#anyways. even though i do like. just generally like him as a person the fact that hes THIS much of a self serving pussy#has just been the biggest turnoff#i feel like i gotta be clear about that. im not trying to GET with him im trying to get CLOSURE#but nooooooo. my luck is Not about to start now#anyways. sorry. yeah#i Do agree but. takes two to tango and rn one party is being a stubborn jackass about it#:/#we'll just have to wait and see what happens#and im just having to accept that Not all of this is on me because i can only do so much#and of the two of us ive been TRYING to make ends meet even if i suck at it#but just in general i tend to blame myself for things because then i feel like i have some ounce of control and can fix the situation#but. man im just having to come to terms w the fact this cant be fixed unless he helps fix it - whatever that may even LOOK like yk#anonymous#but yeah. <3 i hope ur well
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Self insert doodles bc i would 101% just wanna chill and perch on his shoulder
#no i dont have any explanations#hes an ass#he has baggage#smart and aNNOYINGLY ABRASIVE#but i like him a lot anyways?? YELLS#(lowkey find him hot too but thats really besides the point. aha..)
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