#anyway you would not believe how abnormal i am about this video
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marshmurmurs · 1 year ago
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enrichment
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shawnjacksonsbs · 16 days ago
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I probably feel about you how you feel about me, except without the hate. 10-26-24
"People shouldn't be afraid to express their opinions." - Eminem
I'd like to think I'm past that. Grown up away from that side of it, the hate side of it.
I know I put a lot of my heart into trying to not be that, but also without backing down from, what I believe.
It's a hard battle sometimes, mainly because it's such a fine line running between both.
The video in the comments gave me goose bumps to watch, for sure, but it's the quote I'm trying to focus on.
. . .
I'm sure I feel the same about the opposition as they do about me, at least in terms of . . ."How could you believe that side? Or you're falling for that crap!" etc, etc, etc.
I'm definitely an "anybody but Trump" kinda guy, but regardless of where you land politically, these opening and closing quotes are gold.
And then, seeing him welcome Obama, I got chills, but I digress,
I'm not the first to say that I only want the greater good for all of us, but I do want that.
Our biggest difference lies in who we believe and which side we believe will get us there.
One of us is being ignorant and the other is being arrogant(?), or . . . Or maybe we're both being both?
Just give up the hate, and let people be who they want while making choices they believe is best for them and theirs.
Do we really have freedom to, and freedom from . . .?
I mean, really??
~
Things I catch myself doing that I'm trying not to do . . .I still fall short of, probably a lot more than I'd like, but it's like those indirect jabs you hope startles someone awake.
True motives are ours and ours alone. So knowing the why, we do things is on us.
I have things that bother me when I do them. And things that don't.
To reference a specific incident, I had a cousin say something to the effect of, "Someone would have to have their head in the sand" Now . . .not a direct jab at me but grouping me with others that I align with, so I'm jabbed all the same. Lol
I want so bad to be bigger than those times. But like I said, I fall short sometimes myself.
How do we, the ones that don't want to play the us vs them game, stop?
How do I show love and compassion to the side that hates me, while letting both sides know it's not o.k.? How do I get others to follow suit?
'Cause even those that lean my way, do us no justice sinking down to that other level from time to time.
I want to be over it, without losing my way.
#stopthehate
#stoptheugly
Life is too short to spend such a large part of it "against" other human beings thinking and trying for a bigger, better, brighter future.
Mr. ROGERS would be so disappointed.
Feel your feelings. Don't be ashamed and don't let anyone make you feel less than, for doing so.
None of them care about us anyway, not individually, not really. The politicians, I mean.
How am I gonna carry hate in my heart for someone, especially someone I care about, based on an aspiration of a political, elite puppet(s) who will never know my god damn name?
Got 5 bucks says that our daily lives aren't severely affected in any abnormally negative way after this election, no matter who wins.
Just like every other ridiculous hate fueled election we've ever had before.
How many of these have you lived through now?? I mean, c'mon.
Life goes on, and the people we care about in the first person way, like inside 6° kind if way, all die, but yeah hate on that guy who wants a better life for his daughter and doesn't really know all the truth and then bases it all on what he believes in his heart to be true.
. . . .
I want you all to share in the love and the laughter of those really around you . . .before it's too late.
If we stand up, it's game over.
Stop playing it their way. (We could just stop playing the game at all, but that's a whole other conversation)
That's it.
Just quit.
Talk to your neighbors and stop hating people because it's easy or it's the "in" thing to do.
It's so fucking . . .fucked up.
Anyway, until next week;
"And I don't think anyone wants an America where people are worried about retribution, of what people will do if you make your opinion known." - Eminem
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garciavillacisdaniel · 1 year ago
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Integrated project
Story: A description, either true or imagined, of a connected series of events
Tale: A story, especially one that might be invented or difficult to believe
Science fiction: Literature or film that deals with the future and technologies that do not exist yet
tale. (2023). In Traducir Al Español - Cambridge Dictionary. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/es/diccionario/ingles-espanol/tale
science fiction. (2023). In Traducir Al Español - Cambridge Dictionary. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/es/diccionario/ingles-espanol/science-fiction
story. (2023). In Traducir Al Español - Cambridge Dictionary. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/es/diccionario/ingles-espanol/story
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I used an IA called Craiyon, which is totally free to create these images.
An unexpected odyssey
Hello, my name is Frank, and what can I tell you, since I was in kindergarten life has been quite abnormal, my family is something that we could call “rich”. Obviously, I don’t remember how they became so rich but well. During my childhood I noticed how the water began to run out, I still remember the day when the water officially ran out, I mean there is water but it is not admissible in any living being, for example, fish, at the beginning when they stay in those waters they melted like chocolate, currently they have been adapted, let's say that they seem like a strange combination between demon, zombie fish.
But who would have thought that one day everything would change, I still remember when I saw that video, which announced that people were needed for a strange project. “You can't,” my friends told me, “It’s crazy,” my family said; I didn't care about everything and I went anyway, apart from this, I was very anxious, but you must be strong, it's for the greater good, I told myself. Many people wanted to go since the pay was more than half a million dollars, and many wanted a year of good water, but many were not suitable, despite everything I did and I went in.  First, they made me sign a consent saying that they had zero responsibilities in case of any damage or loss, second, they explained to me How everything would be from now on. “You will go to another planet by opening a portal, and through portals we will exchange water,” said our new bosses, also, they said that if we said something of this mission to any person that person would die, and, in addition of that we could have several consequences.
They gave us an agenda, where we would write down everything that would be useful, the truth is that I did not use it since one of my characteristics was a good memory, especially in important moments like this, the next day they woke us up at 4 AM to have breakfast and to give us our itinerary, since this was going to be the big day, they told us that we were going to separate into 2 groups, one would be in charge of maintaining the portal while the other would be in charge of passing it and activating the transfer; Unlike what we thought the fish were not wild, and that helped a lot because we had to be in the middle of the ocean to start, finally we achieved our goal and went to the other planet and we could make the transfer in a successful way, and well since that day the planet was a better place and everything returned to normal, and people learned to never lose water and to conserve something as valuable as it is the water.
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you-did-well-moon · 3 years ago
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Day6 Reaction to s/o learning their instrument while they're away
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Type: Fluff, angst in Dowoon dont know what happened wasnt me
Word Count: 2.865
A/n: I took some creative freedom with why they were away but that is it. Keep in mind, I have no experience with instrument except for when I played the piano in 5th grade for like two weeks. Anyways, I hope you enjoy! - Moon
TW: small cuts, fight, second hand embarrassment
Sungjin
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Sungjin was absolutely and devastatingly exhausted. His own guitar case felt like it was weighing him down tremendously, and he had a huge headache. Jae and Wonpil arguing in the back of the car was not helping in any way. It has been going on since they left the airport. He rubbed at his temples tiredly pressing his head against the cool window from his place in the passenger seat next to their manager. 
Still, he couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at his lips as he thought about seeing you, probably curled up in the couch cheeks puffed from the snack you were inhaling. The pounding in his head lightened at the cute sight he would soon get to enjoy as he played with the loose threads of his old button up shirt. 
True to Sungjin’s imagination, your form was sitting on the couch. Not true to his imagination, you were actually bent over something in your lap, lightly humming and bopping your head to the rhythm being produced by your still clumsy fingers. The guitar in your lap had gotten lighter as the days went by without your boyfriend, and in replacement of his touch, leaving your fingertips warm and tingling, it was small cuts you hadn’t bothered to bandage as it disrupted you when playing.
 You missed Sungjin an abnormal amount. The cold spot in the bed or him making weird faces at you through the mirror in the mirror when brushing your teeth. You missed all of it. With a slight tremble in your chest you started playing the chorus to “You Were beautiful”.
You were so focused on trying to get it right you didn’t notice the door closing only to startle when you slightly looked up through your lidded eyes seeing the shadow looming over the coffee table. With a small yelp of surprise you jumped immediately looking up only to find your boyfriend staring at you with wide eyes. 
His surprised expression made you shrink into yourself. You threw your head into your hands in pure embarrassment letting the guitar gently slide off your lap, hitting the floor with a soft thump. “Can you just pretend you didn’t see that I can’t believe I even tried learning all that by myself I” you cut yourself off with an un-pleased sigh shaking your head and looking at him with pleading eyes. 
Your boyfriend continued in his frozen state for about five seconds before breaking out in the biggest smile rushing around the coffee table in which you panicked trying to get away from him with a squeal, but being too slow im the excitement that was usually in a much dormant state in Sungjin. The wrinkles near the corner of his eyes deepened adoringly, and his chest shook with soft laughter while he held you close. 
There was a fond twinkle in his eye as Sungjin forgot any tiredness that clung to his bones and kissed the tips of your fingertips while maintaining eye contact. He kept your hands encased in his when scolding you for having such low faith in yourself and softly encouraging you. He would probably put little stitch band-aids on your fingertips and continue teaching you, sitting you on his lap and scolding you when you lose focus with a sharp poke at your ribs smiling when you giggled. This man just fell impossibly more in love with you.
“You shouldn’t say those things, look at you love, learning all alone and doing so well. I'm so proud. Would you rather have the elmo band-aids or the stitch band-aids… I don’t know about you but Elmo kinda creeps me out. Just five more minutes little love then you can go mug Young k with Dowoon. Don’t look at me like that! You finally have a teacher and you take him for granted. The audacity-”
Jae
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Jae was a thin hair away from just ripping his hair out. He didn’t believe the kpop industry would take very kindly to him going bald, but he had come to a point where he didn’t really care about what people thought anymore. But thinking about you not being able to play with his hair anymore while he drifted off to sleep with his head on your chest severely upset him.
 Jae had gotten stuck in another limbo, stuck in the studio and in his own head desperately trying to finish any of the unfinished songs left in his computer files. He missed you so much, he eventually called it quits, deciding to go home to you, who he hadn’t seen in days.
Just the thought about seeing you energized his previously exhausted self. He never could get sick of you. Every day, every week was a new adventure, a new chapter, all with his favorite person in the world. The night sky, although beautiful, seemed to mock him, reminding him of how late it was, meaning you were most probably asleep. 
Opening the door to his apartment, he heard soft music. He briefly recognized “I Need Somebody”, and thought you were playing it from your phone. All his thoughts came to a halting stop when he saw you perched on the bed, in his shirt, playing the melody of the previously mentioned song.
You had hair falling into your eyes with your eyebrows slightly scrunched trying not to mess up and heavily focused. Jae had loudly yelled in surprise, causing you to flinch and look up shocked at the sudden surprise. When you saw it was just him, you had comically thrown your hands in the air yelling at him about how it was supposed to be a surprise. 
The irritated look on your face vanished as you went up to give him a light hug with a kiss, softly smiling at him. Meanwhile Jae, was completely out of it, lovestruck eyes while he instinctively returned your affection.
“Come Jae, you look like you haven’t slept in ages, your eyes are so sunken babe”, you had softly whispered to him, rubbing the soft skin under his eyes, the way you were always soft with him when he came back from the studio. You slept in the same bed for the first time in what had been days, Jae tightly clutching on to you.
 He may have not been completely there at the moment, but in the morning when he had time to process everything, he was a changed man. He wouldn’t stop laughing and giggling excitedly, eagerly wanting to hear everything you had learnt. He even poked fun at you when you made a mistake. But it was all lovingly as he also praised you non stop while looking at you with his messy hair and big smile next to you on the couch. He had so much inspiration now. To finish what had been left behind.
“Pop off queen who gave you this much talent, you couldn’t even tell me what bass was last time we talked, which was like a week ago. Might just make you play when I don’t feel like playing. Give you a wig and people won’t know the difference! Why are you booing me, I'm right?”
Young K
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Young K’s foot tapping on the floor of the car was the only sound that filled the car aside from the soft sound of the car’s engine and tires. He was absolutely spent, having to have stayed in a different city for a show he was invited to that was filmed far away from his home. 
Far away from you. Young K could tell his manager was starting to get irritated, but Young K was already massively annoyed and too far in his own world to really care. He missed the pine scent of his sheets, and he missed you.
It was not a good combination. When he got to his place he quietly thanked the manager,  getting his bag before trying to ignore every urge telling him to run into the building and fall into his soft bed with you in his arms. When he opened the door, your keys were there, so he knew you were in the building. That thought filled him with more relief than it should have. 
He did have to admit, hearing “I smile” this early in the day was odd as you usually saved the more mellow songs for later in the night. Young K told himself he had many euphoric moments in his life, but seeing you staring at a sheet of paper with so much determination and a bass guitar in your arms came pretty close to the top.
The absolute warmth that exploded in his chest was a feeling he would not forget in a long time. He could feel his lips slightly curl up in fondness as your hands shook while your eyes wavered unsurely between your hands on the strings and the video on your laptop sitting further on the edge of the bed. Your face scrunched up before you sighed and stared dejectedly at the instrument on your lap. 
“Why so sad love?" His voice made you instantly sit up, pushing the instrument gently off your lap. You crawled to the edge of the bed where Young K had already gotten closer where he met you tenderly running his hand through your hair, and he curved his hand around the back of your head bringing your forehead to his abdomen.
He brushed his thumb over where your hairline met the sensitive skin of the back of your neck immensely enjoying being back at your side. Your hands were clutching the back of his shirt, and your simple touch brought a warm feeling to his chest. You both leaned back as Young K’s chest started to rumble with laughter “You should have waited for me, it would have been easier if I could teach you”, he softly said, pushing your hair back from your face causing you to lightly laugh.
 “I wanted to surprise you, but I didn’t get that far anyways. Can’t become a prodigy in one day I guess”. Young K smiled again, promising to himself to help you as much as he could as he put his hand fondly on top of your head.
“You’re doing so good, just move your finger up a little, you’re plucking the c chord instead of the e chord during the chorus, don’t look at me like that i’m trying to help?! I wouldn’t put you on my level, but I think you’re doing really well. I’m hungry now, what do you want? No- What do you want? I am okay with anything just tell me-”
Wonpil
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Wonpil was trying his hardest not to think about you. From the way you got excited when you got to see the moon in the cloudy sky to the way you smiled when you saw the neighbor’s cat while getting the mail. 
He was happy to be on a trip with her sister, he hadn’t had much time to be with her in recent, well forever really. While you had been invited, you hadn’t been able to attend due to work. Wonpil did his best to keep his mind off you and enjoy the trip, he just hadn’t spent this long without you in a while. 
Even so, he still had a fun time with his sister and her boyfriend creating many memories. He didn’t regret it, but he was extremely happy to come back to you. Opening the door to your apartment, he dropped his suitcase by the door, an excited smile tugging at his lips as he traveled through the apartment with his arms spread knowing you would embrace him as soon as you saw him. He felt so giddy, he didn’t even notice the broken keyboard sounds ringing throughout the living space.
His smile fell in a comical way, his face morphing into one of confusion instead. He recognized a broken rendition of “Mary had a little Lamb”, and tilted his head as he opened the door to your room seeing you with really big headphones on your head staring down at the keyboard with the most offended look on your face.
 How dare this keyboard not give you its secrets! Wonpil couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his chest, not mocking you, but he just thought you were so cute. He lightly touched your shoulder causing you to jump, and the slight movement of your head caused the headphones to slide off your head. It didn’t matter much. You instantly dove into his arms, pressing the side of your face against his chest.
He felt warmth flood his chest as his hand encased the back of your head while he pressed his lips to the top, closing his eyes in bliss enjoying having you in his arms again. He leaned back from the brace as his eyes flashed with amusement and yours with slight embarrassment. He lightly laughed, eyes crinkling. He cradled your face in his hands, a teasing lilt to his voice, “What were you trying to do, hmm?” He could feel your face grow hot under his finger tips.
 “I was just trying to surprise you. I felt bad for not being able to go with you”. He shook his head, hands playfully pinching your cheeks as you whined. “You shouldn’t act that way, I understood from the beginning. It must have been hard for you. Here, come, your lovely boyfriend will make this easier for you”.
“Y/n the keys will not bite prEsS dOWn, no, no keyboards do not have to be oiled, this is a musical instrument not a mechanical vehicle. You are so cute. What am I gonna do with you? No, you can not play the keyboard with your forehead, DO NOT put your foot on the keys. I don’t care if it’s for the vine. 
Dowoon
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Dowoon was beating himself up. Looking back at what happened a few hours ago made his chest tight. He couldn’t help but wince at the words both of you had thrown at each other. You had been with each other for so long, and when his lovely mother asked him when he would propose, although with good intentions, it put pressure on him.
 He was still young. He had mentioned it to you in a joking manner, but there was a misunderstanding and you thought he was blowing it off as he didn’t see a future with you. 
Somehow feelings were hurt, and the fight escalated. And Dowoon decided he was a coward because it was when you had started stuttering through your words and avoiding eye contact, he knew. He knew he had pushed you across a line that might not be able to be crossed again. 
He panicked. He was really good at doing that wasn’t he? He left. He took a bus and went to the nearest hotel he could find. There he was sitting on the edge of the too perfectly made bed with his head in his hands.
Had he just ruined his precious relationship because he was scared of what the future could or could not hold? Why did he have to run away? Why couldn’t he just stay? Most importantly, how badly had he hurt you?
 With a sigh he stood up, and he got on the bus back to your apartment. Staring at the door, the fact you were just on the other side and hurting is what pushed him to open it with the key you had given him. Opening the door, he was met with silence and darkness. Have you already gone? He walked through the apartment, hope dwindling with every step. 
Then he heard a soft thump thump thump. His heart seemed to match with it, and as he walked to his studio which held his spare drum set, he thought of what he could say to make it better. Opening the door, he saw you softly hitting the drum with one stick, as if testing the waters and humming along to “When you Love Someone”. Dowoon couldn’t fight the sad smile that broke out on his face, and the absolute warmth that filled his chest. 
Why did he ever even doubt your future with him? There was no person more perfect for him than you. He stood next to you, softly taking your hand in his and guiding your hand to the right beat, although a bit broken. When your sad eyes looked up into his, forgiving in nature but still frustrated beyond belief, he knew he could still fix things. You were you, and Dowoon was Dowoon. You always somehow found your way back to each other.  
“No no, put your hands higher on the stick, no lower, now higher...a bit lower. No, Y/n drum sticks do not belong in my throat. What do you mean I have no room to talk, I thought we were over the fight. I would marry you in this life and the next! Why are you looking at me like that? I am not cute, I am handsome and overflowing with testosterone. Oooh are those gummies?
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dreamsofalifeold · 2 years ago
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((I enjoy watching tiktok compilations on YouTube, and I tend to watch a lot of storytime videos bc they're interesting to me and I love stories. Anyway, today I stumble across a comment thread being like "I find it hard to believe these people were really abused/traumatized, it isn't that common and if they were really traumatized they would have a hard time talking about it."
McScuse me bitch??? I say this as someone with c-ptsd from childhood trauma, not just my emotionally and sometimes physically abusive stepfather, but as a kid who was in hospitals frequently due to my poor immune system, who lost a parent, who was bullied severely and has serious abandonment trauma from being left with my mom's second ex husband for a year while my mother looked for a house, not to mention other shit from even within the last five years??? I talk about it. Frequently, in fact. I even joke about it because it helps me cope with how fucking awful things were and how fucked up I am now!
Basically every close friend I have has suffered some kind of childhood trauma, almost always linked to unhealthy relationships with caregivers and family members.
Trauma thrives in silence. People who are traumatized don't always act like they do on television or in movies; we're not fragile little porcelain angels who cry and sob whenever something brings us back to our ~darkest point~ and then never discuss it. Most people I know are really candid about their trauma because talking about it, even jokingly, helps people realize they aren't unlovable or abnormal for what they went through. You wouldn't air out a carpet by keeping it locked up, so why would you keep all of the negative things inside you bottled until they rot you??
Sorry, but attitudes like that just piss me off. Trauma survivors deserve to be taken seriously, even if they don't act the way you think they should.))
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scabopolis · 3 years ago
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😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
Hope that I do this properly 🙃
I would adore a XO between Veronica Mars (LoVe) & Once Upon a Time (C/S).
PROMPT: "I’m really competitive and drunk and I just told a rival that my relationship is way better than theirs, but they don’t believe you exist (but I’m too stubborn to admit they’re right)" OR really anything you'd like. Honestly, I'm dying to see Logan and Killian interact/co-swagger.
And / or another installment of "Come Rain or Come Shine" from In Lovers Meeting because I love it with my whole ❤️.
Thank you so much for doing this. You made my day,
😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
Oh @jjmazzy​ you bring my heart so much joy! I didn’t feel quite up to the task to do a crossover between OUaT and Veronica Mars so I went straight for a OUaT AU. I hope that’s okay? 
This is just a silly little thing that I am realizing only fulfills about 40% of the prompt, but I think it’s cute??
ANYWAY! Enough hemming and hawing xx *** Title: Of Expats and Onion Rings Rating: PG Fandom: Once Upon a Time Pairing: Killian Jones/Emma Swan (mentions of Robin/Marian and a smattering of other characters) Additional Tags: Two out of three of my OUaT fics feature Killian as a bartender, silliness and only half a prompt, probably way more fluff than is medically recommended Word Count: 1,500
Every Friday night, Emma Swan sits on the same barstool at the same bar in the same restaurant. This Friday night has her staring into space as she lets the sounds from the kitchen and the bar swirl around her. It’s busier than usual, with almost all the booths and tables filled and the bar area half-occupied. In fact, when she first walked into the bar, she worried there wouldn’t be a seat for her. But the bartender caught her eye and waved her over, a menu and a glass of water waiting for her in her usual seat at the end of the bar. 
Said bartender slides her an Old Fashioned, extra maraschino cherries on the toothpick per usual. 
She takes a small sip of the drink. “Why is it so busy?” 
Killian’s eyes roam about the room and then come back to rest on her. “Some magazine labeled us the best kept secret in Portland, Maine.” 
“And in doing so—”
“Assured that we would never be a secret again. Yes.” 
“The pitfalls of fame.” 
“Burger or chicken sandwich?” 
“Burger. Any chance—?”
“Aye, probably a very good chance, but only because Graham is sweet on you.” 
Emma feels her cheeks redden. “He’s not sweet on me.” 
“Sure he isn’t.” 
She watches Killian step away from the bar and into the kitchen to talk to Graham. How Graham can manage to listen to anything given the noise of the dining room and the kitchen she’ll never know. Graham and Killian both look over at her. Graham rolls his eyes but nods, and Emma raises her glass in thanks. 
“Okay,” she says to Killian when he’s back at the bar. “He might be a little sweet on me.” She takes a long sip of her cocktail. 
Killian’s brow is knit with concentration. “Long day?” 
She nods. “I had a run in with Zelena.” 
“Ah. The wicked witch of the northeast. What’d she do this time?” The ticket printer next to Killian’s till spits out a long drink order, but he listens even as he mixes drink and pours glasses of wine. 
“She got engaged over the weekend and hasn’t shut up about it. And today, she took great pains to ask me, in front of everyone in the faculty lounge, if I’d be okay if she didn’t give me a plus one.” 
“Bit rude, isn’t it?” 
“Right? But then she kept going on and on asking how long it’d been since I dated someone, and did I know that after 35, forty-five percent of women’s eggs are considered genetically abnormal and her fiancé is a very wealthy furniture manufacturer and she’s certain he has some less attractive less wealthy friends he could introduce me to and on and on and on.” 
“Does she truly want you at her wedding?” 
“Oh, yes. She said she wouldn’t take no for an answer.” She runs her finger along the condensation of her glass. “Which is when I did something very very very stupid.” 
“Smacked her?” 
Emma snorts. “I wish. No I—” Her explanation is interrupted by the arrival of her burger and the plate of special order onion rings. Onion rings which are technically available only as an add-on to the steak sandwich but that Emma has a 80% success rate of cajoling the kitchen to make her a plate of. 
She eats her meal with one eye turned to Killian, waiting for a long enough lull in the drink tickets to finish her story. She’s almost finished her burger when Killian slides another Old Fashioned in front of her.
“What was this very stupid thing you did?” he asks, leaning towards her. 
“I told her I was dating someone.” 
Killian remains where he is but she notices the clench of his jaw. “Ah,” he says. “I was unaware.” He seems to hear his own words as he says them because he cringes. “Not that there’s a reason you would tell me. I mean, we’re friends, but friends in that way that I get you drinks and —”
Emma rests a hand on Kilian’s to stop the rambling. “I’m not. Dating anyone, that is.” 
“Then why—?”
“It just popped out. I’m not sure who was more surprised, me or Zelena.” 
“So, this fake boyfriend of yours. Just who is he?” 
“Well, okay, so this makes sense when you remember it’s Friday, and I knew I’d be coming here.”
“Right,” he says, equal parts cautious and curious.
“I told her my boyfriend was British.” 
Killian shakes his head. 
ExPats has been her weekly haunt for close to a year now and while not everyone who works there is a British expatriate, with Killian as bar manager, Robin as front of house manager, Graham as chef de cuisine, and Phillip as pastry chef, it kind of feels that way.
“And that he had blue eyes,” she continues. 
“Ah, I see,” he says, teasing her. “Are you telling me you’re sweet on Graham too?” 
“Not Graham.” 
“In that case, Marian is likely going to have a big problem with you trying to date her husband.”
“And, uh,” she clears her throat, “I told Zelena he has dark hair.” 
Killian wings an eyebrow. “How dark?” 
“Uh, right about your color probably.” 
“My color?” 
“Probably. I said probably.” 
“Interesting.” Emma takes a sip of her drink. There’s a delicious, hazy feeling brought on from the second cocktail washing through her veins. “So, you and I are dating?” he asks. 
“Stupid. It was so stupid.” 
“I wouldn’t say that. I mean, I’ve been meaning to ask you out for months now. This might be just the little push I need.” 
“What?”
“What?”
“What did you just say?” 
“What now?” he asks in return, the picture of innocence. 
“You’ve been trying to ask me out?” 
“Not as such, no.” 
“Oh.” She sinks back in her seat, disappointed.
“I didn’t want to risk you running scared and not being here every Friday night.” 
Emma perks right back up again. “Oh?” 
“You already said that, love.” 
Emma looked down at her plate, the remnants of the crispy bits from her onion rings on her plate. Something occurs to her then. “Graham doesn’t give these to me because I want them. Does he?” 
“Excuse me?” 
If she’s not mistaken the tips of his ears have gone a little red. She loves his little elf ears. “He makes these for me because you ask him. Don’t you?” 
“I might have told him they bring you an inordinate amount of joy.” He scratches idly at a spot on his arm. “And that it brings me an inordinate amount of joy to see how happy they make you.” 
“Did you know my weekly ExPats date used to be on Wednesdays?” 
She can see him try to mentally adjust to the change of direction in the conversation. “Really?” 
“I only came in a few times, but then one week, I had parent/teacher conferences so I came on Friday. And there you were.” Emma shrugs. “Your Old Fashioned is better than Will’s.” She bites off one of the maraschino cherries from the toothpick. “Your smile is better, too.” 
“Emma, darling, are you flirting with me?” 
“What? Suddenly it’s a crime to flirt with my boyfriend?” 
Killian laughs and it makes her heart hum. She likes the clean line of his throat as he tilts his head back. “Your boyfriend? I don’t suppose you’d want to go out on a date with, then?”
“I’m free on Wednesday.” 
“Funny that,” he says. “That happens to be my day off.” 
“Is it?” 
Emma would be content to sit at this bar all night and let Killian smile at her and make her drinks. It seems like Killian is having similar thoughts, until something seemingly flies out of nowhere to hit him in the back of the head. 
Killian reels around to find Robin standing there, arms folded across his chest. 
“What’d you throw at me, you git?” Killian asks. 
“A dinner roll.” Robin gestures at the drink ticket printer. A ticket printer which has at least 10-tickets waiting to be fulfilled. “Pardon, Emma. Mind if he stops flirting with you long enough to fulfill the drink orders?” 
“You’re fired,” Killian says. 
“For the last time, mate, you can’t fire me. My name is on the lease right next to yours.” 
“Murder it is, then.” 
“Make the nice customers their cocktails and then you can murder me.” 
Robin walks away, and Emma notices it’s not just her at the bar who finds herself charmed by the whole display between the two men. She thinks she might see a small group of women sneakily taking a cell phone video, giggling as they watch it through.
“Emma, I’m sorry, but I—”
She waves him off. “Do your thing. I’ll be here.” 
“Yeah?” he asks, and when she nods, he beams. “Good, because if we’re in a committed relationship I’m probably going to need your phone number.” 
“Pour the drinks, you goon.”
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arigatouiris · 4 years ago
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an inconvenient crush // kenma kozume x reader (1/2)
Author’s Note: A new story?? SO SOON?? Thank you for all the love for my previous Kuroo story, it meant the world to me. I write for myself primarily, yes, but it brings me SO MUCH JOY to know that my words reach you. It helps with the motivation to put them out more often. Thank you. This story is very close to my heart because I’m a gamer, although I don’t stream. I’m more like Kenma though, personality wise. Haha.
Word count: 5k+
Pairing: YouTuber! Kenma Kozume x Streamer! Reader
Summary: YouTuber Kozume Kenma has had the biggest crush on Twitch Streamer, (s/n) (y/n), who in actuality simps heavily after Kenma's secret YouTube persona, puddinghead0.
What happens when their paths cross?
Kuroo is honestly tired of Kenma's second-guessing, and (y/n) is a bit of a crackhead.
Warnings: unrequited love, one-sided crush, slight angst, pining, crackhead reader, internet bullying, slang, gaming references, haikyuu manga spoilers, fluff
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C h a p t e r O n e : puddinghead0
Kozume Kenma suddenly turned existential when his eyes shifted to his phone screen for the 12th time in ten minutes.
Was he always doing this? Was he always obsessed with his phone to a point where he'd constantly check for notifications? Did this mean he was deeply lonely on the inside and wanted approval from people on a virtual platform, which meant that the approval was also virtual and none of it was real? Did it mean that he craved to nullify the growing void in his chest by distracting himself with a black mirror that showcased light that could permanently impair his sight?
He let out a breath and forced himself not to look at his phone. He didn't care. It didn't matter. That's what he always said.
    "Hey!" His classmate/room-mate screamed from the entrance to his flat, "Are you watching her stream? Posted two minutes ago!"
His phone was definitely slow. He had been checking his phone but there was no notification. Letting out a breath, and giving himself a mental reason to actually check his phone, Kenma opened the notifications tab to see the one notification he had kept his eye out for had been buried under ridiculous facebook notifs.
An inconvenient crush, that's what he told himself whenever he looked at you. You were a streamer, a bit different from what he did on YouTube because you were primarily on Twitch. There were reaction videos of you on YouTube, which was where he found you, but damn—how could one be pretty while rage-quitting a game? It was abnormal. Nothing about you was normal; college student/Twitch streamer, an apparent baker in your mother's bakery, game reviewer for Sony, and you were insanely cute.
    "She's getting to that part," his roommate commented from behind Kenma's back, while Kenma really just wanted to watch the video in peace, "Shit, she's gonna cry."
You did cry, quite a few times, and too easily if he could add. You cried at the ending of God of War, you cried to The Last of Us (which made sense, but you were perhaps just bawling throughout the entire game), you cried in a game called Detroit: Become Human, you cried far too easily, but you never really quit. He loved how passionate you were about games, and it was the sort of passion he could completely understand.
    "Oh shit," You said in the video, your eyes scanning all over the game screen, "What's happening? What's happening?"
Kenma chuckled at how cute you were, god, you were killing him. You looked worried, and he could visibly see a sweat drop on your forehead, but you were so focused that it didn't matter. Suddenly, there was a screaming sound from the game you were playing, and your eyes popped open as wide as they possibly could and you just sat there, unmoving. He loved how you never squealed or made any loud reactions, except when you were in a fight with a difficult boss, but whenever something traumatic happened, you just froze and sunk it all in. You were currently playing the second part of The Last of Us, and a traumatic scene was definitely happening. Kenma had just finished playing it the night before, so every scene you were playing was familiar.
    "I officially hate this game," You said, your voice breaking and he desperately wanted to hold you, "Fucking hell."
    "God, she's amazing." Kenma's roommate said, eyes turning into literal hearts.
    "Hm." Yeah, she is, Kenma thought, but could never really say.
As a YouTuber himself who streams games, he was aware that you were not as popular, and it was a fact that he really didn't like. Sure, you were on a less popular platform, but Twitch was incredibly popular by itself as well. He also understood the bias that came with being a female gamer, and while it sounded ridiculous to him, Kenma was one of those people who believed gaming required no gender.
He adored your content, and he secretly adored the hell out of you, so seeing you soar would only make him happy.
    "I... I can practically feel what pain she's feeling right now," You spoke about the game, a lone tear threatening to leak out of your eye, "But! We shall persevere. I've been waiting 7 years for this game, so I won't let... won't let something like this halt my interest. Let's see if this has a point to it all."
God, he adored you. But, Kenma considered it an inconvenient crush because of course, the world was small. The first big crush he has on someone and he hoped it would remain over the internet, but it just had to become something more tangible, something that could make him weak in the knees.
You, a college student/Twitch streamer, an apparent baker in your mother's bakery, a game reviewer for Sony, insanely cute, and also happened to be one of his YouTube channel's biggest fans.
He had only recently discovered your personal twitter handle, and dear lord, you were simping after him with no remorse. It wasn't as if he was all you talked about, but he had also noticed the trajectory of the games you were playing were on par with his own timeline. Kenma had finished his final stream for The Last of Us II just the night before and you had now started playing it. Right before that, it was Bloodborne, and before that, it was Final Fantasy VII Remake. However, your public handle was a lot more professional and despite knowing that it was there, he hadn't sent you a follow request because well, Kenma called himself an introvert in every matter but Kuroo just said he was shy.
While he knew that he could easily approach you and have you know he knew of your existence, Kenma preferred not to get into such detail. It was comfortable admiring you from afar, and it was comfortable being where he was—he had his company to work hard over, he was also a computer student and a YouTuber. Sure, he had his hands full especially after calling you abnormal for something that he himself was doing, but he never really fit into a bracket anyway. Kenma's latent obsession with you was something he wasn't particularly proud of and this wasn't because it had anything to do with you, but simply because he didn't want to make a big deal out of it. Change, in many ways, scared him. And by changing the structure or dynamics of him admiring you in secret, while you admired him not so secretly, Kenma was certain that it might not lead where he may have wanted it to go.
Surely, Kuroo was against this sort of caution, calling it cowardly and saying it lacked passion; but Kenma knew it was just a crush. There was no way he could deduce the kind of person you were based on how you gamed or reacted to games, based on the little tid-bits of information you gave out while playing those games, or even how you openly spoke about how much you admired 'puddinghead0's videos. Kenma hated Kuroo for giving him that name, but he was too lazy to come up with a new one.
    "Also," You sprung up in the final two minutes of your latest video, "I'm on Patreon, now! I honestly have no idea how it works, but if you really like the content I make and want to support me, you can become a patron and wish me luck!"
Kenma waited for his stupid roommate to go out of his room before he could open Patreon and find your link, which was thankfully in the description. Without a second thought, he donated to your profile but cussed instantly when he realized what he had done.
He had sent you a donation as himself, as 'puddinghead0's Patreon.
Without a second thought, Kenma called Kuroo and explained what had happened.
    "That is why, Kenma, you need to check a thousand times and not let blind love navigate your actions—"
    "If I knew you were going to spout such nonsense I wouldn't have called you."
He could hear Kuroo snicker while he ran a hand through his hair. Kenma groaned before Kuroo said, "How bad is this, Kenma? She'll be happy. Of course, this means she'll know you watch her content, but how bad can this be?"
    "I didn't want her to know."
    "And leave her devoid of the happiness of having her idol appreciate her content? You're cold, Kenma."
    "You don't understand. What if... What if she tries to contact me?"
    "You, my friend, have not even shared your personal account anywhere. The only way she can contact you is by commenting on your videos, which I am sure you check constantly to see if she did comment, or Tweeting, which she does every three days."
Kenma blushed at the accusation because it was true.
    "She won't know who you are. Besides, there's no harm if she even does contact you! Just tell her casually that yeah, you like her contact. I don't see what the big deal is."
    "Of course you don't—"
    "Oh, she's tweeted something."
Kenma's entire body froze. Leaving Kuroo on the call, Kenma opened Twitter on his laptop and there it was, your latest tweet.
I am trying NOT to freak out over puddinghead sending me a donation on Patreon, pls save my soul, I am dead.
Kenma groaned before hearing Kuroo laugh once more, "She's adorable!"
I know that, Kenma thought before feeling his entire face flash up. Ending Kuroo's call, Kenma looked at your public profile before then moving to your personal one. He wasn't following that one either, but he wanted to see your tweets, he wanted to know more about you—he wouldn't deny any of these facts, but Kenma believed it was far too idiotic to dream of getting to know you through a virtual media. He wasn't even the sort of person to become close to people he met in real life, how could he allow himself a virtual friendship?
The thought staggered him, and the idea behind it was what kept him at bay. Kenma wanted to know about you, talk to you, learn about who you were and what you were doing, but he felt the media that connected you was what separated you.
It wasn't cowardice at all if he was just sticking to the facts and being real.
*
The next day, Kenma walked to his class by himself, listening to the latest podcast by Joe Rogan. While the external sound wasn't entirely muted, Kenma could discern sounds of people talking, cars moving around, and other noises even though he was playing the podcast on full sound. However, there was one sound in particular that stood out. Kenma paused before turning to his right, noticing a crowd of people had gathered there, with some sort of event going on. He didn't pay attention to half the events that his college conducted, his mind was obviously quite busy elsewhere, but when the announcer moved around in a weird Joker cosplaying outfit, Kenma was a tad bit intrigued.
Was it gaming related?
He slowly moved toward the crowd before finally being able to hear what the anchor was saying.
    "We've got prizes for the top three best performers, and one of the participants is the one and only (s/n) (y/n), streamer from Twitch!"
Kenma froze, half-minded to run the hell away from there. But, it seemed as if his feet were stuck to the ground. How had he not known this? Didn't you always announce the events you go to? Why were you suddenly here? A second later, he spotted you, hair put up in an updo, a plain black tee, and regular jeans. You were smiling, but some part of that smile seemed a bit hesitant.
    "We will be playing a bit differently today! Instead of the usual Fortnite battles or Apex Legends, we'll be going went and battling out on Red Dead Online! And of course, if you beat (y/n) here you earn bragging rights!"
He noticed you shift in your position a little bit, clearly uncomfortable with the attention you were getting; it didn't even look like you wanted to be there. Kenma could feel his chest hurt, and his palms were sweating now. That's all it is, he told himself. An inconvenient crush, an inconvenient crush, that's all.
Kenma sighed before noticing how he barely knew anyone there and was almost thankful for that fact; but before he could thank his stars, a hand threw itself around his neck and sprung him forward, earning the attention of not just everyone there, but especially you.
    "We have our first participant," It was his goddamn roommate, "Kenma's a brilliant gamer!"
Kenma's eyes immediately found yours, and you were looking at him with wide, confused eyes. Although this was set in the open and the atmosphere was quite cold, Kenma felt nothing but warmth radiating all over his body at the mere sight of you; you were just a few feet away, and you were giving him a rather sympathetic expression, and god, you looked so fucking pretty—
    "That's great! Sign up, ya'll! Winner will be winning a brand new DualShock 4!"
Oh fuck, Kenma thought before he felt his heart beginning to pound. He was now seated beside you, and he could practically shrink into non-existence. You were unmoving, and you weren't looking at him, but would you have looked at him if you knew he was puddinghead? Insecurity swarmed his being and he could practically feel steam escaping his ears but a moment later, he thought he'd die.
    "This was so last minute," you said, rubbing the back of your neck, "The anchor's my cousin and she's so demanding."
    "Oh," Kenma said, feeling his heartbeat skyrocket, "I see."
    "Yeah! I mean," You giggled now, "I'm not even good at Red Dead Online!"
Kenma smirked, knowing the fact already. You struggled with Red Dead Redemption not because you were bad, but because you couldn't progress with a plot so divisive. You wanted to explore more, and since the game was so vast, you barely bothered with the Online version. You turned to him now and tilted your head.
    "You're a gamer, I heard? Kozume-kun, right?"
Fuck, she knows my name, "Y-Yeah. I game when I'm free."
    "Do you have a Twitch or YouTube?"
There's no fucking way I'll answer that, "No—"
    "Ah, you must really be having a great time then."
Kenma blinked before turning to you with confusion. What did you mean?
    "Don't you enjoy streaming?"
    "Ah, no, no," You flailed your hands shyly, and Kenma believed he could combust, "It's not like that. I just think, after a point, streaming becomes more for the fans than for yourself. I used to do it for me, but now... I'm needed in places like this for promotion, and I need to have a Patreon if I'm popular or it'll look weird, I don't know... Too many restrictions. I just love gaming, you know?"
Kenma found himself smiling, "Yeah, I know. I've seen your videos."
    "Oh?"
Kenma's eyes widened. He wanted to slap himself on his forehead.
    "I—I mean, y-you're popular."
    "Thanks! You're really sweet, Kozume-kun!"
Fucking hell, Kenma placed a hand on his forehead, She's too cute.
    "Say," you said, a sly tone to your voice, "Do you want to get out of here?"
    "I'd do anything." Kenma honestly agreed.
But, you couldn't just up and leave. You were called here as Twitch streamer (s/n) (y/n), and that meant your behavior was restricted. As much as you seemed to hate said restriction, Kenma was certain that you wouldn't go against it. It could take a big blow against your viewership, and you wouldn't take that chance.
A second later, your hand gripped his wrist before you shot him a wink. Kenma's heart jumped to the skies before you pulled him away from the crowd, with participants lining the entrance to enter their names. Sure, you were doing something bad—your cousin wanted you there, but not once had she even asked if you wanted to be a part of this event. Just as Kenma was pulled in without his consent. You weren't a competitive gamer, and you were not going to be, even if it was for someone else. After running away a fair distance, Kenma felt the part of his wrist burn right where you were touching him.
    "I think I need to run more in real life and not just as Ellie." You said, and Kenma chuckled.
    "Running's good."
    "I used to run track," You said, turning to him. "Now I run in games and that's it."
You have no right being that cute, he thought before clearing his throat. He slowly pulled away from you, which made your eyes widen before shooting him an apologetic smile. He was a bit confused as to what you had done, did this mean you didn't care about losing followers?
    "You might think that I've committed career suicide," You scoffed, "Honestly, this is the bravest I've been in so long."
    "What do you mean?"
You shrugged, "Ever since I became a bit popular by streaming, I've just... I could feel myself change with the way my viewers wanted me to be? I don't blame them or anything, I just think that the love I get from them makes me yearn for more. And that yearning leaves me... inept to be myself. It's the downside of wanting to remain popular, I guess."
    "It's not like you can't be yourself and still be popular." Kenma added.
    "Yeah I know," You said, "I mean, just look at puddinghead0, we don't even know what he looks like, and wow. I adore his content."
Kenma froze once more. Was this being recorded? Did Kuroo finally tip you off and was this being filmed for his reaction? Whatever it was, he wasn't going to reveal to you now.
    "Y-Yeah, I think he just doesn't care."
    "I wish I was more like that because I end up caring. I like the comments and the views and the love. Agh, it's such a weird complex moral question. Don't even get me started."
Kenma laughed at your reaction before you turned to him and stuck a tongue out. Kenma rolled his eyes before waving a hand at you.
    "If anything," Kenma said, looking at the ground, "You didn't lose this follower today."
Your eyes widened at his statement. You smiled before nodding, and let out a chuckle.
    "Thank you, Kozume-kun."
*
Locking the door to his room, Kenma began to edit for his latest video. He was making a review for The Last of Us 2, but his mind was elsewhere. He still hadn't told Kuroo that he had met you, which would only cause the black-haired man to tease him relentlessly. Letting out a sigh, he felt sleep douse his eyelids as he continued the edit, right before a notification popped up on his phone.
It was you.
He narrowed his eyes before checking the date and time; it was unusual for you to stream live on random days. He'd learned your pattern by now. You'd been doing this for a couple of months, and it was quite easy for him to know just when and what time you'd begin. However, the screen for The Last of Us 2 was open and you looked like you had just stopped crying. His heart broke at the sight, and he instantly closed the tabs to his own edit, before opening your video on his monitor. You were taking deep breaths before chuckling.
    "Hello to everyone that's still with me," You sounded so broken, Kenma felt helpless as he continued staring at you, "You might be wondering why I'm... yeah. So, I did something and I guess I got punished for it? I was forced into a game contest and I think walking out of it made some of my followers mad. I even spoke to this other person about walking out and honestly, it didn't hit me then that what puddinghead's doing takes a lot of courage."
    "Ah, fuck, (y/n)," Kenma groaned.
    "I guess even when I expected to lose followers, I didn't expect the hate? Some of the comments were just... nasty. I..." You sniffed, "...I didn't expect that you would hate on someone for making a personal choice? And I didn't do it to offend anyone, I seriously don't know how the internet works. Oh, oh wow—" You looked troubled and Kenma could see why. "—losing out on viewers now, great. 'Don't be a whiny bitch', 'This is why girls shouldn't game'..."
You took a deep breath before calming down and saying the few words Kenma feared you might eventually come around to say.
    "This is (y/n), signing off to a world where gaming is appreciated and is not filled with a community of hate. Hope to see you there."
And the stream ended.
Kenma sighed before leaning back, no thought in his head. He knew for a fact that his room-mate must have seen the stream as well, and Kuroo would be calling him about the entire ordeal just to ensure he had something to say about it. Kenma, on the other hand, felt like he had practically pushed you to make this decision and partly felt like taking the blame, despite the common sense telling him that he had nothing to do with it. You weren't the sort of person who would jump at something without a second thought, and even if he didn't know you personally, he had been following you and your streams for months now. It felt like he knew that part of you quite well.
Kuroo was the first to call. Kenma stared at the phone for a bit before letting out a breath and getting back to editing his video. He only had to add commentary, and his mind was already circling on what to say.
Uploading the video took him exactly two more hours, after having missed three calls from Kuroo and twelve messages. At one point, Kuroo had even stopped contacting Kenma, thinking he was busy with something, and he was spot on. Kuroo's eyes wandered on the new notification about his friend's YouTube channel, which was weird considering it was not yet time for him to post something. He knew quite well that Kenma might have definitely seen (y/n)'s stream, and wanted to desperately talk to him about it, but without a clue of what the boy was thinking, Kuroo simply clicked on the notification and let the video play out.
It was the review for the game, The Last of Us 2, and Kuroo knew while giving the review, which was around 8-9 minutes, Kenma would speak his thoughts that were a tad bit uncensored toward the end. He'd talk about the drama surrounding the game, he would even bring up the entire hate that this game was receiving, but instead—Kenma had a rather strange dialogue instead.
    "One thing I don't understand is how toxic the gaming community can be, at times," Kuroo paused, narrowing his eyes at his friend's words, "While we welcome new gamers to the entire journey of learning and discovering the joy of gaming, we also tend to put them down if they didn't adhere to a certain trend. I came across one such incident happening to (s/n) (y/n)'s Twitch channel."
    "Holy shit!" Kuroo sat up straight, eyes wide as saucers at the bold move his friend made.
    "I'm part of this community and I think I have the right to call out how toxic we are in general," 
Kenma's voice didn't even waver, but after knowing him his entire life, Kuroo could deduce that the boy was a bit angry, 
"(y/n) didn't particularly do anything wrong, and she's received some nasty comments about being a female gamer, and I think that's...just disgusting. She has all the right to either attend or ditch a gaming event, and no one has to be forced to do something they don't want to do. We all have games we don't like despite being gamers, we don't have to do it all. I support (y/n), and I'll admit, I'm saddened by how her fans have treated her. Her content is great and I have immense respect for her. I hope she decides to come back and stream more. That being said, I think The Last of Us 2 is..."
As he got around to talk more about the game, Kuroo knew that this was a huge step for Kenma, and he had no idea what suddenly made the boy rethink his entire decision on never bringing her up. Now that he had, he's indirectly initiated a conversation with her, she'd definitely try and reach out now—in any way she possibly could, just to thank him at least.
Kuroo noticed his phone ringing a second later and a grin made its way to his lips.
    "What just happened?"
    "I met her, Kuroo," Kuroo almost had the wind knocked out of him, "She was at my college campus. I was walking back to my room since classes were canceled. There was some sort of gaming event. She didn't want to be a part of it, and neither did I, and we ditched. It was—"
    "You like her more now, don't you?"
When Kuroo received nothing more than silence from Kenma's end, he was certain. His precious, introverted, best boy had fallen for someone. It was a proud moment, almost.
    "You have to tell her—"
    "Kuroo, this... this is all I want to do."
    "That's bullshit, and even you know that."
    "What? You want me to open up to her and tell her I'm the YouTuber she's been gushing about for so long and I was the one who kind of pushed her into doing what she did, and so that she can hate me afterward for hiding the truth because I wouldn't be losing out on anything and she—"
    "Whoa there, Kenma. I'm just saying go talk to her as her favorite YouTuber. You're overthinking this."
    "No, you're underthinking this. I did what I had to do. It was... hard to see her like that."
Kuroo let out a sigh but before he could say anything, Kenma had already ended the call. That boy needs to grow a pair, he thought, a bit annoyed at Kenma's nature of avoiding his feelings. While Kenma believed it was for the best, he knew he was simply running away from it. Kuroo knew his friend adored (y/n), but the boy couldn't categorize that as real feelings because he's met her just once. Finding something real virtually scared him more than finding something real in real life, and while Kuroo wanted to understand that, it only annoyed him because Kenma wasn't even trying.
When you watched puddinghead0's recent video, you were jaw-dropped in awe and absolute admiration. Tears filled your eyes, but what was more was how his voice now seemed a tad bit familiar, though you didn't pay any heed to it since you've been following this channel for an entire year now. It moved you to know someone you've been admiring has been watching your content, but at the same time, he was speaking up for you? You wanted to thank him, you wanted to send him a message and say you were incredibly grateful for what he's done and the only way you knew you could say something was on Twitter.
So you mentioned him on a tweet and poured your heart out within character limit. You wondered if he would notice your tweet since you've mentioned him countless times before, but even if he didn't, even if he paid you no heed after all of this, you were still grateful. However, a second later, you received a new follower. You blinked upon noticing that it was Kozume-kun from the other day. A soft smile fell on your lips at the soft recollection of running away from a gaming event, after which everything spiraled, but you didn't in any way blame him. Your mind again drifted back to puddinghead0 and you sighed.
I'd kill to see him, man, you thought, eyeing your tweet of him dreamily.
A second later, there was a notification. You almost spat out your heart at the mere words: puddinghead0 likes your tweet.
puddinghead0 likes your tweet.
puddinghead0 likes your tweet.
    "Oh my god—" You choked on air. However, a second later, you found it difficult to remain sitting on your bed.
Don't thank me, I hope you're feeling better. You didn't deserve any of that.
Is that a—
...deserve any of that. <3
Fuck me.
Kenma almost dozed off in class right before it ended. It wasn't like it was school where the teacher would wake him up after noticing him asleep, no one really bothered. Kenma was pushed awake by the momentum of the class once it was over and he leaned back before gathering his things. Tightening his hair tie, he casually walked out of class and got to the campus. He spotted the event area, where the gaming event had occurred and instantly spotted his room-mate and a bunch of people gathered there. Rolling his eyes, he walked away from there, not wanting to gather any attention.
    "Kenma!"
He had failed. Kenma froze to his spot before turning to spot his room-mate dashing over to him, a wide grin plastered on his features. Wrapping a hand over Kenma's shoulders, his roommate brought him to the others he was talking to, before releasing him.
    "You're that guy (y/n) ran away with during that event, right?" One of them asked, and Kenma didn't bother to respond.
    "Why did she run though? I mean, it doesn't make sense for her to just up and leave."
    "I've been telling you," The same guy said, "She's not the one playing those games. She's just the face."
Kenma frowned. What is this dick talking about?
    "Man, I think that's harsh," His roommate said, "I just think she's too chicken to play in front of people—"
    "She's literally a streamer." Kenma said, rolling his eyes.
    "Yeah, but why did she—"
    "If you can't understand that she doesn't owe you shit, then there's no helping it. She didn't want to play at that event, and she didn't. I don't see why you aren't calling me a fake gamer for running too." Kenma snapped.
The others shrugged, "That's because we've seen you play—"
    "It's bullshit." Kenma said before walking away. You all are bullshit, he thought before the frown on his face settled into an uncharacteristic glare, directed at what who knows what.
A moment later, he felt his phone buzz with a notification. Kenma opened his phone and saw that he had a message from you, but what confused him was—
The message was directed to Kenma and not puddinghead. His heart jumped as his fingers roamed over the notification, wanting to open it only when he was in the comfortable confines of his room. Swallowing the bubbling anxiety, Kenma fought the urge to smile as he continued walking back, unaware of what the Twitter message could be. It would normally take him around 12 minutes to get to his apartment from campus, but that day, Kenma merely took 7.
On reaching his room, he finally allowed himself to open your message.
(y/n): Hey! I've taken a break from streaming for now, just wanted to let you know. I don't know why I'm sending you this message, but talking to you that day made me realize that I don't really need to seek approval constantly. Also, puddinghead liked my tweet and I'm a bit too happy so I needed to gush, don't @ me
Kenma chuckled, feeling his heart jump at every word you'd said. He knew you didn't realize that you were gushing about him to him, but that didn't matter. He wanted to gush about you too. He felt a stone stuck at his throat at how real all of this felt, despite having only seen you once.
Kenma Kozume: I think he's the sort of guy who isn't too loud about the things he likes. And I think a break is a good idea, (s/n).
(y/n): Call me (y/n), came the immediate response. Kenma's eyes widened at the fact that you were online, and that the two of you were currently exchanging messages live.
(y/n): Yeah, I got the feeling from his videos that he's perhaps a private person. I'm still really glad that he supported me, I can't thank him enough. I'm feeling much better already!
Kenma smiled, I'm glad that you are.
(y/n): Also
He blinked.
(y/n): Do you want to co-op at Bloodborne? I'm trying to get a platinum, haha.
    "Fuck," He let out a breath before chuckling uncharacteristically. "You can't be serious."
(y/n): I'll send you my PSN, and you can add me as a party member. Only if you're up to it, I mean.
Kenma Kozume: Sure, sounds like fun. Also
Kenma gulped. He felt like this was showing off, but he didn't care. He was going to say it.
Kenma Kozume: I already have platinum in Bloodborne. :)
(y/n): Ah, screw you.
Kenma chuckled. He wouldn't admit it, but his heart was hammering against his chest and his palms were sweating. Soon, he'd be connected to you via the DualShock and the two of you would be co-oping in a game that was designed to make players fail. He wasn't too sure how much more his heart was going to take, and while he knew he had to tell someone, for some reason, Kenma wanted to keep this a secret. It wasn't because he was ashamed or he didn't want anyone to find out.
It was simply because it was too good to be true, and he didn't want to lose out on a chance to get to know you more. Because, if this kept up...
If this kept up, Kenma was surely going to fall in love with you.
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a-ghostlight-for-roman · 4 years ago
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how to never stop being sad
Summary: Following his brother's acceptance, Roman's life felt like it was falling apart. His family was turning against him, that awful snake was being allowed in their home, and worst of all, he still couldn't seem to do anything right, no matter how hard he tried.
How does he choose to deal with it?
Not in a good way, that's for sure.
Warnings: Gore/Death/Violence (none actually occur but it is described), food mention, cursing
AO3 link
Chapter 1
Repeat to yourself that they’re not really gone
Time has proven
That fooling yourself into believing a lie
Is the most effective way
To deal with things you have no control over
Roman was fine. Completely 100% percent, absolutely fine, and he would tolerate no thinking to the contrary. Things were abnormal, sure, but he was coping. Maybe he felt a bit (a lot) guilty for letting things in the Mindscape get so bad, but it’s okay! He’s managing! Maybe he’s surrounded by people that barely tolerate him now, but he’ll fix it!
...eventually.
Right now, though, he’s in his room. Alone, as is usual these days. Usually, he’d ask Patton or Virgil to hang out with him, but after the last video, things were… Tense, to say the least. 
Patton wasn’t mad at him, of course; he wasn’t ever truly mad at any of them. However, Roman would have to be stupid not to notice the disappointed looks Patton gave him when he thought he wasn’t looking or the way that after Roman left the room, he always made a point to talk to Janus afterwards, as if he needed special attention just for enduring Roman’s presence.
Things were a little better with Virgil, but he was frustrated with Roman for tolerating Janus’ presence at all. Despite his obvious vitriol towards him, he still outright refused to talk about what exactly Janus had ever done to him. So Roman was forced to choose between Patton, his father figure who’d never meant to do him wrong (who had acted like Roman was unreasonable for sticking to the very moral rule set that Patton had imposed on him since they were children), or Virgil, who Roman had been wrong in not listening to before, & who was obviously extremely hurt and betrayed by both Janus, and now his own family.
He still hadn’t quite been able to choose, straddling the line between adhering to Patton’s kindness policy towards Janus and respecting Virgil’s feelings. It didn’t really work-- rather, it just seemed to leave them both dissatisfied. Roman could hardly stand it.
...but it’s fine. Really. It’ll blow over eventually. He isn’t quite sure how, exactly, but things always turn out alright in the end, right? There’s always a happy ending.
Except when there isn’t, but… bad endings only happen in Remus’ stories, & he doesn’t have power here in the Mindscape.
...except he sorta does, now. After his video, he’d (albeit reluctantly) been accepted. His ideas were considered, even valued, now. Sometimes, he was even chosen over Roman. Not only by Thomas, but also by the other sides, at times; Logan may think he’s slick, but Roman’s seen him specifically request his brother’s assistance in the Imagination, in the living room, in the archives, in his room- It made Roman sick to think about, and whenever he walked through the house, he could see evidence of his brother’s influence littered throughout. For the life of him, he couldn’t understand the appeal. When had society fallen so far as to value a duke more than a prince?
---
Roman hadn’t thought he’d been in his room for long; he’d only meant to duck in to get a breather after having to endure Remus’ maniacal ramblings for nearly half an hour, but it seemed he’d been brooding long enough to attract Logan’s concern. He heard a knock at his door and broke out of his haze, looking towards it.
“I apologize for bothering you Roman, but I was wanting to inquire whether you were alright. It’s been an hour,” Logan said. Had Roman really been away for that long? No wonder Logan was checking on him.
“Yeah, Specs- Sorry. I’ll be out in a minute, just finishing a project,” he lied. Logan was so cold, calm, rational- Surely he would look down on Roman’s groveling simply because he couldn't deal with his brother for more than a few minutes. As much as Roman was full of himself and proud of his work, he thought if Logan talked down to him, he’d break down and cry.
“We’re currently 'hanging out' in the common room. You’re welcome to join whenever you finish. I look forward to hearing about what you’ve been working on.” Roman could hear his footsteps slowly grow farther from the door.
Shit. Now Logan thought he’d been working on something, so now he had to do something-- he couldn't just show up empty-handed. They’d see through his lies in an instant. He’d be just as bad as Janus, imagine what Virgil would think--
He took a steadying breath. Okay, yeah, he’d lied, but that wasn’t so awful, he just had to make it right. He just had to make something, and that shouldn’t be so hard, right? That’s his job! He’ll just think of something real quick, and it’ll be done in a jiffy, and then it won’t be a lie anymore, and on top of that, he’ll have something to talk about! Talking parts were hard to come by sometimes when you had to find something that would include the two people you hate most, your former-enemy-turned-best-friend, your dad and your colleague (as he insisted to be called), but everyone was always eager to hear his new ideas, so this would be perfect.
---
It was nothing special, but it would do. He hadn’t had the time or energy to think of a concept for a whole scripted video, so instead, he’d written the next Shoutout Sunday. Simple, but it had to be done, and it was already Friday, anyways. He closed his notebook, and stood up, keeping it under his arm. He never knew when inspiration would strike, so he tried to carry it with him whenever possible. He opened his door and stepped out from his room, making his way down the hallway past the multicolored doors of the other sides, pointedly avoiding looking at Janus’ signature black and yellow-colored door. Out of sight, out of mind.
As he walked into the commons, the conversations faltered for a moment, but everyone quickly returned to what they were doing. Remus was noticeably absent; Patton and Virgil were curled up on the couch, sharing a blanket between them and speaking in excited whispers; and Logan and Janus were speaking across the counter separating the living room and the kitchen while Logan made dinner on the stove and Janus leaned with his hands crossed under his chin. 
Roman lingered by the stairs for a moment, caught off guard by the lack of greeting, but continued to the side of the couch not occupied by Patton and Virgil. He’d hoped to share his script with Logan, but he was busy at the moment, and he so rarely was this casual with the others; Roman figured it better to let him be for the time being. He pulled his notebook from under his arm and summoned a pencil from his desk. If he couldn’t share his idea, he might as well get started on the next.
He spent around five minutes doodling a new creature to introduce into the Imagination when Logan finally seemed to notice he was there.
“Ah, Roman! Apologies, I hadn’t noticed you were here. What was the idea you were working on?” he asked. He turned off the stove and fully turned to Roman, looking past Janus. Roman was almost ashamed to say he felt a certain degree of satisfaction that Logan had put aside his conversation with Janus in favor of speaking with him. Keyword being "almost."
“Well, it is a most illustrious, melodic creation--” Roman sunk down from the living room and rose into the kitchen, laid his now open notebook on the counter, and gestured towards it with a bow-- “Behold, the newest Shoutout Sunday!” He smiled and rose from his position, bouncing on his feet a bit as Logan rested his chin on his hand, looking thoughtful, and read it. Logan gave a slight, satisfied smile.
“So you’ve worked ahead of schedule, then. Wonderful! Good work, Roman."
“I know,” Roman replied, beaming, “I shall have a new idea by the morn-- perhaps I can even start the next video script!”
“So long as you do not burn yourself out, Roman. Otherwise, I look forward to your next contribution.” Logan closed Roman’s notebook, handed it back to him, and then opened a cabinet, gathering bowls for… Whatever healthy monstrosity was in the pot on the stove. Roman could only guess what it was. Some sort of soup, maybe? “Will you be joining us for dinner tonight, Roman?”
“I’m afraid there are simply too many ideas and too little time, I must return to my work!” Roman replied. Janus narrowed his eyes at him from across the counter.
“I wouldn’t be witnessing any self-neglect right now, would I, Roman?” his voice dripped, cool and patronizing. It carried a lilt of care, but it was clearly faked-- Patton would have scolded him if he’d been listening. Roman rolled his eyes.
“No, I am simply dedicated to my craft! Creations don’t come from thin air, do they?” he replied. Logan tilted his head, brows furrowed.
“...They do,” he said. He raised his palm, and atop it, a paper appeared. “As you can clearly see, I’ve just summoned this piece of paper- Now, it’s not on par with many of your creations, of course, but I’m sure you understand my point. Just last week, you summoned me a new Rubik’s Cube. Don’t you remember?”
Virgil snorted from across the room, and Roman sighed. “Yes, Specs, I- I remember. I meant that metaphorically.”
“That was not a metaphor. According to Oxford Languages Dictionary, a metaphor is 'a figure of speech in which a word or phrase is applied to an object or action to which it is not literally applicable.' Would you like an example?”
“Not now, Logan. I’ll be taking my leave-”
“Aw,” Patton interrupted, “why not stay? You’ve spent so much time up in your room- Now, I know sometimes we need our alone time, but spending some time with your famILY won’t kill ya!”
“Did someone say kill?” came Remus’ shrill, excited voice from by the lamp where he’d just appeared.
“Not that kind of kill!” Patton rushed, “there will be absolutely no killing on my watch, mister!” Remus put his hands on his hips and blew a raspberry at that, exaggeratedly pouting at him.
“You’re no fun,” he replied. “Nothing wrong with a little casual murder to pass the time! Everyone dies sometime, might as well make it exciting.” Patton grimaced as Virgil’s eyes went wide and he groaned.
“...Everyone dies sometime. We are going to die. Thomas is going to die. Death is inevitable,” Virgil mumbled shakily, though it was still quite loud once the tempest tongue kicked in. He put his hands in his hair, but before he could pull at it, Patton led his hands away.
“Now Remus, that may be true, but there’s no need to dwell on it, especially when you know it will upset Virgil,” Logan said with a strict tone.
“Oh oh, I wonder who’ll go first when Thomas dies? Think it’ll be all at once, or one by one? I vote Roman-”
“Won’t you just shut up?” Roman spoke up, voice raised. “You’re harming Virgil and you know it. Keep your ideas in your side of the Mindscape; We don’t want them here.” His fists balled up as he glared at his brother. Oh, what he’d give to be able to walk up to him, to punch him square in the jaw. He’d love to unsheathe his sword and bury it right in his fucking stomach, to watch the emotions flicker through his eyes as they slowly went glassy and he collapsed to his knees, the blade continuing up through his skin like it was paper, the blood leaking through his clothing and pooling around him on the floor-
Roman blinked hard, brows furrowed. No one had responded to him yet, because it had only been a moment. What kind of thought was that? Certainly not one becoming of a prince. Was Remus messing with him somehow? Roman knew he could project thoughts into Thomas and the others’ heads, but Roman had never experienced it himself-- Why would Remus give him an intrusive thought right now, especially one so gruesome as to include his own gory death by Roman’s hands? He didn’t look like he had done anything, but he had to have, right? Roman didn’t come up with ideas like that. He was light creativity, he was good creativity!
Patton must’ve noticed his distress, as he quickly looked between the two. “Oooookay,” he began, “Remus is being a little inconsiderate of Virgil. And that isn’t okay! But that doesn’t mean we don’t want him at all. Everyone messes up from time to time!”
“But he’s doing it on purpose!” Roman exclaimed. He gestured his arms towards Remus and waved them incredulously. “I mean, look at him! He doesn’t even care!” 
Remus didn’t respond, continuing to stand in his spot, smiling and unblinking. Janus cleared his throat, gathering their attention. 
“I’m sure Remus just loves being talked about as if he isn’t here. Regardless, it’s hardly fair to criticize him for one incident that’s a result of his function as intrusive thoughts, especially considering that you’ve shown a pattern of worse behavior over the past… What, three years?” He looked towards Logan for confirmation.
“Yes, approximately that long, although that’s a misleading usage of the information. He’s improved over time,” Logan responded.
“Only if you consider his treatment of Virgil exclusively. Regardless, you've proved my point,” Janus said, sounding satisfied. “If it took Roman three years to warm up to Virgil, why does Remus only get a few months? Not to mention that he’s just being told that he’s unwanted and to leave, you've never experienced despite your actions, and which is preposterous notwithstanding.”
Virgil finally ripped his hands from Patton and covered his ears, shutting his eyes tightly.
“Shut up shut up shut up!” he said frantically. Patton bit his lip and looked around the room.
“Listen, usually I’d encourage a healthy family discussion, but now’s really not the time to be doing this-- Roman, please go to your room. Remus, I’m not mad at you, but I’d really appreciate it if you would go ahead and leave for the night, too.”
Roman stared at Patton for a moment, mouth agape and brows furrowed. “My room- Patton, I’m not five! This isn’t even my fault-”
“Don’t argue, Roman,” Logan cut him off, “Do as Patton said. We’ll discuss this more in-depth later.”
Roman gave a loud scoff as he trudged across the room and began making his way up the stairs. He gave one last glare to Remus, who’d finally begun to move, and then continued to his room, where he fell backwards onto his bed. He closed the door with a flick of his hand, and stared at the ceiling, letting out a resigned sigh as he reminisced. Why was everything so backwards nowadays, he wondered? When had the dastardly acts of his brother become the new norm, overshadowing his own heroism and creativity?
It wasn’t as if Roman could even do anything about it, either; Patton’s decisions on what was right and wrong was like the word of law in the Mindscape. Sure, Roman could challenge his thinking, but he hardly wanted a repeat of his… Frog incident. He couldn’t bear it if he distressed him that much again. All Roman could hope for was that one day, sooner rather than later, someone would either talk some sense into him, or he’d come to the realization himself that Remus was merely a parasite to their famILY.
For now, at least, Roman could dream. 
‘Patton loves me just as much as the others. He’s a dad! Dads love all their children equally.‘
‘Even if it seems like it sometimes, no one really hates me- Well, besides Remus.’
‘...And even if they do, I can fix it.’
Even if it meant lying to himself.
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gandalfs-mommy-milkers · 3 years ago
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my health.
k so to run it down: basically around five months ago i started experiencing a lot of fatigue and daytime sleepiness without any lifestyle changes. at first i chalked it up to stress, possibly spurred by my family member going through chemo, but it was too abnormal to just be from stress.
i started waking up every day with a headache and was struggling a lot more to sleep. i have always snored, since i was a kid, and i used to always wake up at least once during the night to use the bathroom, but that started becoming more frequent. i started waking up feeling so tired and exhausted, every single day. and i would go through the whole day like that. i'm still going through most of my day like that.
fast forward about 2 months and i finally was able to bring up these recent issues to my psychiatrist and my primary doctor. both of them suggested bloodwork to test for different vitamin deficiencies. before i could have the bloodwork done, i experienced cataplexy for the first time. it was terrifying.
cataplexy is a sudden loss of muscle tone and is most commonly associated with type 1 narcolepsy. it can be just one part of the body (your face going slack, for example) or it can affect your entire body at once (which is what happened to me). i was laying in my bed watching tv, feeling very sad and anxious, my arms struggling to type on my computer, when i lifted my arm up and promptly had it fall on my face. i tried to move my arms, and couldn't. i tried to move my legs and couldn't. i tried and tried to move everything, anything, and couldn't. the only thing i could move was my face, and i didn't even really have control over that. i was just laying there, arms covering my head, stuck, and crying uncontrollably. i couldn't even call for help. all i could do was cry and feel. it was probably 3 or 4 full minutes before i felt my abdominal muscles twinging, and suddenly i could move again. i was so relieved, but also terrified.
i just so happened to have a video intake appointment the following morning with a nurse practitioner at the sleep clinic. we talked about what had happened, as well as my history of snoring and my family history of sleep apnea. she notes that it doesn't sound like narcolepsy because i've never experienced this before, but also says that cataplexy can be associated with and caused by other things, although it is rare. she believes that what is most likely happening is that my body and brain are so tired from consistent poor sleep caused by possible sleep apnea, that it is beginning to cause other issues (such as the cataplexy).
i take the home sleep test on a friday night. i have to watch a youtube tutorial on how to hook it up correctly. my adhd is so thankful for the very specific instructions. i bring it to the clinic the following monday morning. i am diagnosed with sleep apnea and sleep paralysis, only one of which is a bit of a surprise. honestly, idk how i didn't realize i have sleep paralysis. though i don't think i've ever hallucinated (save for maybe once when i was a kid), i regularly find that my brain is awake and aware during the night, but that i can't move my body. really, i thought this was normal and something everyone experienced. i just thought like, in that alpha sleep, your brain was awake but your body was still. i didn't realize that being unable to move even when you wanted to was sleep paralysis.
anyway. moving on. i get a CPAP machine. ohhhhh my cpap. how i love love love my cpap. sure it makes me break out around my nose a little more, and sure sometimes the straps bother the tops of my ears where they meet the skin on my skull, but dammit if that bitch doesn't help me sleep. cpap machine my beloved, thank you for helping me to get oxygen throughout the night. thank you for allowing me to dream again. i don't think i've dreamed consistently in years.
however. the cpap is only helping so much. i've been using it all night every night for almost 3 weeks and only some of my problems have started to improve. yes, i'm sleeping through the night most nights, and i'm waking up without those awful headaches, and i'm sleeping deeply enough to dream again, and i'm waking up with a bit more energy. but i'm still so tired. i know it can take 6-8 weeks to fully feel all the positive effects but. i'm so so tired. I've stopped experiencing cataplexy but my legs feel so weak every day, and my arms often do too. my legs are constantly experiencing that crawling feeling that i've come to know so well with restless leg syndrome, but now its happening all afternoon and evening, even when i'm not trying to sleep. my legs have started to tic now, twitching and jerking upward toward my abdomen. it happens most often in the evening, and used to only happen sometimes when i was very very tired but has since started happening every day. i'm just so discouraged and anxious and sad. i'm sad that this is happening and i'm sad that i don't know why. this pandemic and my family member's cancer have already been so detrimental to my mental health, my depression has gotten so bad again, and my anxiety has worsened. and now, this. i'm just. i'm so tired.
anyway, that's it pretty much. i just wanted to spell it all out and like. ask for help? offer validation?? idk. if you're going through or have gone through anything like this, let me know. let me know what worked for you, let me know if this post helped you feel more valid, let me know anything you want to let me know. i think asks are open.
<3
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emerald-studies · 4 years ago
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Diverse Perspectives | Discussion 3
I sent some questions to @jasperwhitcock​ for her perspective as a POC woman and daughter of an immigrant.
[ It is required to participate and watch/read these discussions, in order to follow me. Participate or get tf out. We aren’t performative in my lil’ area on Tumblr.
This discussion isn’t representative of an entire population or meant to be super professional. It’s to share different perspectives and also is an opportunity for me to practice what I preach: intersectionality. If you’d like to participate in this series please send me a pm or an ask and I’ll get back to you ASAP. We can do a written, audio, or video interview.]
As a mixed person, do you feel isolated from your community?
J: If you mean community as in the community I currently live in, I’m fortunate enough to live in a very diverse place. Surrounding the city of Houston, there’s a lot of prejudice integrated into a lot of the suburban neighborhoods, but in terms of the city itself, I think the POC communities really uplift and support each other. I’m a concert photographer when there’s not a pandemic, and I’ve always appreciated the way latinos and black artists are respected in the indie community. Houston’s a very rap/hip hop/R&B city, so black artists are especially celebrated. There’s also great latinx bands that I know, latinx venue owners/employees, and latinx brands connected to the indie community. We’re very well represented in this area.
If you mean community as in the latinx community, I wouldn’t say isolated, but depending on the day, I might say that I can feel distanced at times. This isn’t particularly due to the latinx community itself, so much as it may be a distance that I create in my head. As a mixed person, I think there are times where you can feel confused on where you belong. I’ve brought up the quote before from the Selena movie, where Selena’s father Abraham is speaking on the potential difficulty of Selena being accepted in Mexico because of the fact she is Mexican American: “We have to be more Mexican than the Mexicans and more American than the Americans, both at the same time! It's exhausting!” It can be difficult at times to navigate your sense of belonging when you are in between two cultures because you want to recognize that you may have privileges someone of full Mexican descent may not have, but at the same time, your life is still very much defined by being Mexican and having Mexican blood while living in America too. You’re definitely not absolved from having latin experiences. Latina stand up comedian Anjelah Johnson made a joke in her stand up about there being a Latinx hierarchy. She said that Spanish speaking latinos are better than the rest of us who are not fluent in Spanish (such as herself), and it was funny because sometimes you do feel that that can be true. My tías will always ask me why I’m not fluent in Spanish, and my mom will be like “yeah, why don’t you?” and I’m always like… because y’all didn’t teach me! My parents speak Spanish to each other at home. My father is not only fluent in Spanish, but his Spanish is oftentimes superior to a lot of Spanish speakers according to my mom and my tíos. He used to teach English in Mexico, so there is no reason that my sister and I shouldn’t have been perfectly bilingual. The reason they didn’t teach us as children is because they didn’t want us to be speaking Spanglish. (Spoiler: it happened anyways). Around white people, I definitely feel that I am not a white person. I feel very much latina in a group of white people. But then around latin people, I sometimes feel white enough to feel a sense of shyness. I definitely feel more at home with latinx people, but overall in both groups, I definitely feel that I am mixed.
It doesn’t happen often, because I think although the majority of latinx people have pride in their background, the hyperawareness of our identities right now is relatively new, but there have been instances of latinx gatekeeping the latin identity. Growing up, I didn’t think about what I was labelled as or think about how my family structure is different to other families. I didn’t consider how in some areas, it is an abnormality to have an immigrant parent or a parent with an accent. I definitely noticed that my family was different, but I didn’t understand why until much later. My mom, her sisters and brothers, and my primos… They don’t live their lives with the awareness of being defined as Mexican immigrants. Of course, they again have pride in where they came from. They live as Mexicans and engage in Mexican culture, but overall, the way the youth today has really grasped onto the labelling of our identity is kind of a new thing. There are some young latinx people who do try to quantify and measure whether or not your experience is valid. I know it comes from a place of protectiveness of their own experience, but it’s ridiculous to gate keep because something that really characterizes latin culture is our warmth, our sense of family, our willingness to embrace other people as part of that. If you’re of latin american descent, you have a place in the latinx community.
Since your parents don’t have college degrees, do you believe college is important and/or necessary?
J: I think it depends! I think a lot of immigrant parents really push for their children to get a college education because they see that as opportunity, particularly when they did not earn college degrees themselves. I think college can be important depending on what you want to accomplish, but I also think it’s not completely necessary. For my career path as a photographer/videographer, I chose not to do college. I do think I would have enjoyed college because I like learning, but because it was something unnecessary for my job, I couldn’t justify the time invested or putting my parents into a difficult financial situation. Especially because my college education would have overlapped with my sister, and I saw how difficult it was to juggle handling my sister’s student loans. For my sister’s career path (she is studying to be a nutritionist/therapist to help teenagers with eating disorders), college was necessary.
Your Mom has been stuck in the US, unable to return to Mexico for awhile, has your Mom’s experience with immigration changed your views in some way?
J: As context, my father lived in Mexico for a decade and married my mom in Mexicali. They hadn’t planned to move to the United States, but when they came to the US to marry here so that she could have citizenship and be able to visit his family, there were complications that made it to where she couldn’t leave the country. Luckily, the time she was unexpectedly stuck in the United States didn’t last super long! Long enough to become comfortable enough to decide to settle down in California, but we have been able to travel to Mexico often. I think it really highlights how unnecessarily complicated a lot of the processes regarding immigration are. The people in the country who are very malicious about undocumented immigrants love to jump to saying, “well, why can’t they just become an American citizen?” when the reality is that every process in place has a lot of complications. Not everyone has access to the resources to be able to make these transitions happen smoothly. Also, the time it takes to acquire your visa is not an overnight thing. People severely underestimate the difficulty involved.
What do you think about the “hard-working immigrant” stereotype?
J: I hate the idea that immigrants work hard because they’re low-skilled, but I do love that there is a lot of pride in how motivated immigrants are. It’s always been a ridiculous claim that immigrants are taking American jobs. Immigrants work the jobs that the majority of Americans have no interest in doing, especially the people that make this complaint. For a country that prides itself on working to make your dreams come true, Americans neglect to recognize that immigrants have a drive that most Americans don’t have.
Which parent do you feel more connected to? Your Mother who’s an immigrant or your Father who was born in America?
J: I really do feel that I am a coalescence of both my parents, so I think I feel equally connected to each of them. I feel a very strong emotional connection and concern for my dad because his mental health suffers a lot. His mother had bipolar depression at a time where mental health was even more stigmatized, and she endured a lot of ridiculous, merciless treatments that are no longer utilized today. When he was nine years old, his mom committed suicide, and this was an event that really defined his life forever. I think that kind of heaviness passes down through your family. When my dad is not doing well, I feel really imbalanced and emotionally impacted even if I’m not home to witness it. It’s kind of like that idea of an invisible string tethering you to someone, and it’s a weight that I carry always. However, overall, he’s a very positive person. When he is going through his kind of manic highs, he’s a lot more of what I recognize of who my dad is. He’s creative, a musician, and deeply caring for other people. His mother’s death has empowered him to really try to make a difference and “paint a picture of a better tomorrow.” I’m a lot like my dad in personality, but in disposition, I’m so much like my mom. She’s tough and outspoken at home, but in public, it takes awhile for her to open up. My mom’s very selfless, kind, and very much shy and quiet. She definitely exemplifies a lot of the sacrifice that you see many immigrants make. I do like both sides of my family, but I definitely feel more at home with the Mexican side. My dad’s side is loud, vivacious, and very much funny, but I feel extremely shy around them. My sister and I have always felt a tiny bit left out. I think they’d be hurt to know we feel this way, but I definitely don’t think they do anything to intentionally enforce this division. But I think it developed because there is a bit of a cultural disconnect between my aunts and my mom. It’s also very interesting to me that when they first met my mom, my mom didn’t speak any English. It’s fascinating to consider how it might change your perception of someone to go from not being able to communicate with them to watching them learn your language. My mom enjoys the time that we do spend with my dad’s family, but she’s kind of the odd one out in that her humor isn’t the same and her experiences are so different. I think that my dad’s sister and brother’s families were able to connect in a stronger way, so sometimes my mom, my sister, and I feel just a little isolated. In those moments, I feel the most aware of my Mexican background. With my mom’s side of the family, it’s a lot more comfortable. My dad’s able to develop his humor in a way that translates well into Spanish, so he fits in very easily.
You’ve lived in a “Blue/more liberal” state and a “Red/more conservative” state, which state has affected you more?
J: Definitely the red state. Seeing how intensely and ridiculously conservative some southern people are has really radicalized me in a way. I feel overwhelmingly liberal because there’s a defensiveness that develops when you’re in a space like this where you have this intense disbelief that people hold the ideas that they do. Especially because in Texas, black and latinx culture is a major contributor to southern culture. There’s a lot to be said about how black culture shapes the south, but because I’m latina, I’m focusing on latinx culture with this question. White conservatives want our food, they want our work, but they don’t want us. I don’t understand how anyone can be all #TacoTuesday one day, and then the next, be anti-immigrant. If you really want Mexicans out of your country, then maybe you should start living your life without any Mexican influence. Stop eating Mexican food. Clean your own pool and mow your own lawn. It’s ignorant to speak down on immigrants when their life would be so altered to be rid of immigrants. They rely on immigrants. Their lives are shaped by immigrants and built by immigrants.
(I had to chime in here: )
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 Are you proud of your parents?
J: Absolutely. As a young teenager, I had a lot of problems with my parents. I think I still have issues I’m working through as a result, but now that I’m older, I really do feel a deep sense of admiration and respect for them. Growing up really makes you view your parents differently and understand them as people rather than just as parents. I held onto a lot of anger and resentment, but I’ve come to truly see how they really did do their best. They’ve worked very hard, and I think not having everything that kids around me did really helped me grow into a more grateful person.
Have you faced discrimination for your race?
J: Of course, but in all honesty, it really rolls off my back. I think hate that is personally directed at me doesn’t bother me, but the discrimination that does affect me is anything directed or related to my mom. I remember my parents had a customer who made a really ugly complaint to my father about my mom’s english. My mom essentially handles most of the written communication with their business, and she still speaks and types in broken english often. The majority of my parents’ clients are latinx, so it’s typically not an issue, but it’s unbelievably offensive and ridiculous the assumptions people will make about your intelligence based on your english. The customer had no idea that the woman she’d been communicating with was my father’s wife rather than just an employee. It’s really sad how someone can see someone as unworthy of respect until they’re tied to a white man, and then they’re suddenly apologetic. This is another extremely mild example, but I’ll get a few laughs when I mispronounce something or don’t know how to say certain words. People always find it funny as though it’s embarrassing –– and it definitely can be –– but people forget I learned english from a woman who speaks two languages.
As the child of an immigrant, how has the anti immigrant talking point affected your mental health?
J: I think the toll the anti-immigrant bias in the United States has on immigrant children is a relevant conversation to have, but I think I’m very lucky in that I feel very tough in the face of that ignorance (which is not to say anyone whose mental health suffers as a result is not tough!) If anything, I feel pity for the people who are so hateful that they see other human beings in such a derogatory and entitled way. Similar to what I said before, my outrage really comes from a place of defensiveness for others. The talking point doesn’t hurt me, but it hurts me that people can speak about my family and my community the way they do. It hurts me that there are other immigrant children who have to work as hard as their parents to make their sacrifices worth it, and people are so insensitive as to not respect that. I’m pretty strong, but it does break my heart when my people are disrespected. If someone were to say something to me, that’s fine, but if i saw someone mistreating a little mexican lady in the store… I may be 5’3 but that don’t mean I won’t come for your ass. Okay, in all honesty, I’m really not a violent person. I’m more of a rise above kind of person because the hate someone has in their heart is not worth our time, but some people do need a chancla thrown at them to learn some respect.
In your opinion, in what ways does the Latinx community need more support?
J: I think because the latinx community is so much so composed of hard workers, people really need to support latin businesses more. That’s a direct way to impact latin lives. There’s an abundance of latin small business owners in every category. So many white kids love going to Cozumel for Spring Break and love wearing sombreros on Cinco De Mayo, but then the rest of the year, they have no care or respect for the authentic culture. For every dollar a white man makes, hispanic women still make statistically less than white women, asian women, black women, and native women. We gotta back up these businesses. Choose local taco shops or restaurants over chains. Choose online shops and Mexican boutiques over fast fashion. And this applies to everybody. We can always support black business or asian businesses over large competitors. It really does make an impact. I also think a lot of latinx children need access to better mental health resources. I’m lucky in that because my father struggles with mental health issues, mental health in my family wasn’t exactly a taboo, but in a lot of latin families, mental health is something that is hard for older parents to validate. Latin children need those resources. A simple google search of “latin mental health resources,” bring up a bunch of organizations that you can support. I think every POC community needs to be boosted right now because although we’ve been under attack, conversations about minority communities are being had by white people right now. We have their attention, and we do need their support to enact change because they have the power as the oppressor. We need to be going to bat protecting black people right now because of the insane damage the community has been enduring at the hands of police, and we need to be protecting immigrant children from what’s happening to them at the border. I know the election is extremely controversial right now, but I would urge anyone who has the ability to vote to really consider the importance of doing so. People love to be cynical about how our votes don’t matter, and I understand that cynicism, but a lot of immigrants don’t have the luxury of voting when the results of the election will directly impact their lives. I hate that there is no option of a president that will perfectly support POC communities, but there are options whose party is far more aligned with supporting and protecting POC communities than Trump is. Trump spews hate and fuels racism and prejudice. He calls Mexicans rapists and black protestors thugs. He encourages the blaming of the coronavirus on the asians in our country. He does not need any help winning the election. We need to get this hateful man out, and I strongly encourage anyone who can vote to do so.
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Let’s have a discussion! Did you learn anything new from this conversation?
Let me know here.
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To close out each post, I’d like to write a lil’ paragraph about the person I talk with:
I’m so lucky to have you as a friend darling. You always bring a smile to my face when we chat. You’re funny and so smart. I admire you deeply for being able to share your perspective in a clear way. Thank you for putting up with my 2 am messages lol 🖤🖤🖤🖤Your continued support makes me feel safe and very, very, loved. I hope I encourage the same feeling with you. 
You’re the best babe,
-Faithxx
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calypsoff · 3 years ago
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Sixty Four.
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“Rihanna, hello!? Are you with us” I blinked looking around me and then looking at the laptop “yeah” I laughed to myself, I zoned out to a place where I wasn’t married or pregnant, the way I would get him back for this in so many ways “I am here, carry on. So” I stifled out a yawn “sorry, so the Puma event will be in California for me? That is sweet thank you, I know it was going to be in London but moving it for me is sweet” I am tired as hell “yes, so as we was saying the event is pretty much after your husband’” I rolled my eyes, do I even have one “yeah, ok that is fine. I am excited, sad that I couldn’t be in the promo video. I just didn’t expect to be growing this big” I laughed “funny when this shit sells because of me, I don’t even think my foot would fit in any of the shoes at this moment” I sighed out “anyways, I am fine with that. I will do everything I can, I will be posting soon with the slides on so I will start rolling that out” I explained “Yeah, that is fine. So onto other things” Jay Brown smiled at me, it wasn’t a smile that I want. It’s that he knows I don’t want to speak on it “cheating rumours, what is happening. Your publicist is in the Zoom meeting, so let’s speak on it” Jay Brown sat back in the chair “we need to speak on something that is plastered on many avenues even though you have been quiet about it, he is where? In Canada and you are in Mexico. What is happening” looking over at Mel “it’s a little bit of a misunderstanding but I rather be quiet on it, I haven’t exactly spoken to Chris like that. So no comment really, I don’t want to speak on it when I don’t know what to say. I know my husband hasn’t cheated on me, that is it” silence from the call and this place is driving me crazy “so can you actually speak to him, he’s doing a lot of damage. We are building him up alongside you, if he is putting my client down Robyn then something needs to be done about it” nodding my head “when I speak to him I will, I need to go. Bye everyone” I knew that part would come on “ASAP Rihanna, we need you to do that” getting up from the chair, closing my laptop.
Sitting down outside on the chair, this weather is the only thing that is making me happy. Just sun, sea and breeze “are you ok? You knew they was going to ask; everyone is asking. I know you’re sick of people asking but I would ask, just like you snapped with your mother, but they are just asking, they don’t understand when you say he isn’t when the blogs have really manipulated the situation” Mel sat down across from me “he texts me, he won’t call because he knows I am pissed. How can he do so much in these two days, he has me Rihanna looking at his Instagram like I am nothing. I don’t want to be nasty to him, I don’t but it’s getting there. He hasn’t checked on me, I want to get him back, I want him to know pain. He doesn’t know where I am or what I am doing. We are flying back to Cali; you are coming with me to my scan. I bought the date forward. I said I am busy, I will find out the sex of my baby without him there, we will come back to Mexico. I have to get him back; I have to do it. I have worked so hard for him; I don’t get it. I am never enough for a man?” Mel held my hand “that is untrue, I think he is in the moment. He’s having fun but the fun is no good, I believe in Chris. I know his intentions aren’t what the public see, the girls are making it that way. But I am excited to come with you, you my wife” I smiled at Mel “I was daydreaming if I wasn’t married or pregnant, I would have got him back publicly to shame him, but he is my husband, and I don’t want that. So” I breathed out “I am doing that, I know he said he is coming back Monday night, night? You hear that? Such an asshole, not even morning. But we will be back here, he will feel how I felt, and I put that on my momma. I am not going to lash out, but he will feel it” I slammed my hand on the table, I am sick.
Mel and I are funny together, we have a burner account to be nosey and to mingle with my fans. My fans want me to divorce, I get it. Outside looking in this looks bad, it looks like he is openly just doing that, but I know he isn’t, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry, they are writing thesis about my wellbeing, how I am a single mother already. They are very hard headed my fans “juicy, so someone asked who is this chick? I don’t get it why is everyone on her ass, this fan page put India Love has been with Drake and has been staying at his house for a week now, looks like he has passed him onto that bastard husband of hers, fave can do better. She has been around, I mean are we shocked” shaking my head “I didn’t even know girl until now, is he being blind to the mess. Like I am deep in it and he is in that OVO compound just doing what? I mean come on, are you really being this ignorant” speaking of him, he calls when I just want to slap that face of his “what?” I answered, “I call and all you keep saying it what?” placing my phone on loud speaker “are you being ignorant Chris? I know how much of an asshole you can be, are being ignorant?” I need to know, he is just being sly with everything “those blogs can suck my dick and if you believe that then you dumb as them” shaking my head “right, Chris you are very new to this. Trust me, you are very fucking deluded right now. So you didn’t repost anything on your page?” I just can’t help myself; I am not getting real answers by being quiet “I have no idea, I was drunk. I didn’t see anything on my page” Mel’ mouth fell open “so all those screenshots were just lies Breezy huh? You know what, bye get the fuck off my line nigga” disconnecting the call “no way, he has been caught out, he knows he has made a mess. Oh my god” he is digging and digging “if I knew he wanted fun then I wouldn’t have married him, he asked” I sniffled “anyways, I just. I need to get on hateful mode, tomorrow we are going to the hospital and coming back” flicking the tear away, Chris tried calling me again, but I put it down, he can go and have his fun because he will have no choice but to be coming home to me soon.
I somehow feel upset that Chris is not here, I feel the sadness in me but he needs to feel how I feel and he will, I look so stupid publicly and social media is the devil for him, I feel for him because that India chick is running, I was going to comment but I stopped myself because then it looks like there is issues, I didn’t know he followed her either. Not even recent either, he been following her which to me I didn’t think like that. But the recent picture of Chris I seen and I know his face, I think it’s hitting him now. He isn’t smiling but yet manages to take pictures, he needs to know that India chick is not a friend, she is dragging him down. I assume he is thinking they are just friends, and he is being kind. I know him, I know what he is like, but he is playing dumb, he is really doing it “Mrs Fenty-Brown” looking up as the nurse “hi” getting up from my seat “hello, nice to see you again. You look so well, follow me” smiling at the nurse as I followed her to the room, Mel wasn’t sure about doing this and was like maybe this will break him but he has the world questioning my intentions of marrying him, I can do better but I can’t because I love him, I do love him and to me he is perfect but he is causing so much shit and then when he played a stupid card about being drunk, I don’t care. I rather find out the sex of the baby with Mel “hi Robyn, welcome” Audrey waved me in, walking into the room “nice seeing you” hugging Audrey “likewise, and who is this?” she pointed at Mel “she is my best friend Mel, Chris is busy” Audrey shook her hand “please come in” sitting down on the chair “I always said I had time for you did I not, I guess you have a busy schedule” nodding my head “I do so that is why I had to change it, but thank you for fitting me in” it was nice of her.
Audrey wasn’t wrong when she said that this scan is long as hell, she hasn’t said anything to me so I can imagine that things are ok with the baby but she is still measuring things and checking for any abnormalities, I have been very quiet since laying down with Mel holding my hand but I am just missing him and he should have been here really, this is what sucks but he has shamed me enough publicly, and making me look stupid “did I ever tell you that on Chris’ and I honeymoon that this guy called captain, I never said anything about being pregnant, that was when I was hiding that fact, so nobody really knew. He randomly told me that I am having a daughter, out of nowhere said I am having a girl. And I was so taken aback that he said that. I questioned how he knew, he said he sees the future and that I have four children but he is not sure about the forth, I am like what the fuck” Mel’ eyed bulged out “if he is correct I am going to him, he can tell me where the fuck I am going wrong” I laughed “likewise, that is if he is right” Audrey added that to the end, she isn’t giving anything away “he also said that we have a beautiful marriage and there isn’t anything we can’t take, things will be bumpy so yeah” I shrugged “I am being deadass Robbie, if he is right. I am going to Jamaica and seeing him” I chuckled “you ain’t going to wait for anything huh” shaking my head laughing “nope, Audrey tell us please” Mel is rushing her.
Audrey has been quiet and that scares me “why are you quiet?” I asked, she spoke more last time “I am doing a report on baby, there is a lot I have to write. No news is good news, if I started speaking and telling you then I was leading up to bad news. So are we ready to see baby, I can tell you the baby is so healthy, very active in the stomach. You heard the heartbeat right, but shall we see?” nodding my head “I can’t wait, I want to see my baby” I shrieked “I always felt like yes I am pregnant but it was a tiny little thing and I have been reading up on it and now they take form so I am so excited” Audrey smiled “that is right so if you would like to look at the screen in front of you, and now it’s in a weird position, let’s see if the baby moves while we do this” the screen came on and I pulled a face “this is the baby feet” she laughed “awww, showing the feet off, how adorable. Oh wait, I see a penis” Mel said, squinting my eyes “I am joking” hitting her arm “lying bitch” she is annoying “do you know hundred percent what the baby gender is?” I questioned “I can say one hundred percent I know what it is. Do you want to know?” looking over at Mel and guilt just came over me but then why should I wait “oh my god look at the baby moving Robyn, this one doesn’t actually be still” I swallowed hard “tell me, I want to know” staring at the screen seeing my baby “if you can see here, she just put her thumb in her mouth” poking my bottom lip out “wait” it just hit me “we have a mini Rihanna with the way she moves” placing my hand over my mouth “it’s a girl?” Audrey nodded her head “It’s a girl, congratulations” I sobbed out loudly, I was louder then I should have been but I am feeling so hurt about everything and now I am having daughter.
I feel so embarrassed that I cried the way I did, I wanted to run out of the place after that “mess” I said to myself “don’t say that, I am happy. So fucking happy, a whole niece. And I think she has your nose; I swear she does. Just look at the polaroid” shaking my head “you think I did wrong?” I asked Mel “erm, only you know your own pain Robyn. I think what makes it worse the headlines, it’s making the whole thing worse. Only you know the hurt he will feel but I mean, he has the world thinking the marriage is sham too, it’s a hard situation” looking out of the SUV window “I just wanted him to tell me before, I wanted him to keep in contact. It stemmed from that, that was the downfall. He is showing out, I get it but he needs to come back to who he is, he is not like them. Money can change a person, it can, and I don’t see that with Chris, but you end being that way because you have to show off to make it. I don’t ever expect him to not be around females, I don’t. But there are classy women and classless. Those girls that are there are there for one thing, I fully expected women to be there, I did but I just you know. I didn’t think Chris would be laughing and joking that way with them, he is flirty with his niceness and then when he reposted that and deleted it and his reaction to it, I have work on my hands. His ego is getting in the way, one of us are going to break and I hope it is him because if I do then my point isn’t going to get to him” I spoke to myself really, Mel will be just listening “my daughter will never go through what I went through, she will have a home and a loving home. She won’t go through that, she won’t and so help me god I won’t allow that, she will be loved by her dad, and she will get that” wiping my tears “she will get that Mel, my daughter will. Anyways, back to Mexico I need to sleep. I am tired” this is a mess.
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Drake’ crib is the best thing I have ever seen in my life, the place is amazing, and I appreciate that he even allowed me into his home and let me just relax with the homies, I have had the best time here “back to sunny Cali now” Drake made his way over to me with his hands stuffed in his pockets “yes, I think it’s time. I think a nigga is in trouble, so you know” he got his hand out “I don’t pay attention to the blogs, you know what is in your heart so who cares” dapping him “true but thank you. Also they think I am a rapper now” Drake laughed out “album soon come, but we will see each other soon. Birthday next” I took in a deep breath “I think I am going to be in trouble bad, there won’t be one for me” Drake is laughing but I am being dead ass “this is why I don’t do marriage; I am young, and I need to evaluate myself. I need to test and taste the world yet but you’re an exception you had to wife Rihanna up, that was a must because it’s Rihanna but marriage for me, you did it anyways, but I wouldn’t pay attention to what the blogs say, you know your heart” he has a point “Breezy leaving us that quick, he barely arrived” Drake turned around to India “he has priorities now, you could both catch a flight together. I am joking but he’s going, link up soon. Tell riri it was nothing, it was just a little get together” picking up my duffle “be quiet nigga, anyways I am out. Indian, peace. Nice meeting you love” waving her off “until we meet again” I laughed out, that won’t be happening for a while “sure” I said as I continued to walk off.
I have not managed to look through social media like that, I have been peeping here and there but from what I know, from what TJ has been saying it’s not good and now I have to face the music of Robyn which I did nothing wrong, she is acting like I had an orgy which yes there could have been a thing but no, I am faithful to Robyn, she is my wife and I love her, but I enjoyed myself so much. I have never laughed so much in my life, just good vibes. Good booze, good weed, good vibes all around. It’s just amazing but now I am here, and I am dreading it, Robyn did not see the IndiaLove repost, I did it in a drunken manner in the middle of the night and I deleted, she sleeps early. It’s all hearsay on what happened and she is reading into that “thank you” picking my duffle back from the backseat as I got out of the Uber, I don’t know about that SUV shit, I don’t’ know how to be booking that shit when Robyn be telling about it. Drake only allowed phones in the oarty, that is why there is only pictures of that floating around, there was plenty of other shit in that, it’s all bullshit but I am just going to have to listen to Robyn go on about it, throw me out of the bedroom and deal with that, she is going to be dramatic.
I huffed out, I came back at night because she will be asleep and looks like she is. It’s quiet as hell but none of the lights are on, let me go upstairs and say hi to her that I am back because I want her to know that I did come back. Walking up the steps, looking down at my phone laughing at Drake’ text about have a I been kicked out yet, TJ said the same thing what is wrong with these niggas. Making my way to the bedroom, I don’t want to argue with Robyn this is why I will let her speak on how she feels first before I even say anything, yes I get it women were there. But nothing happened, pushing open the bedroom door and it’s just dark. No light on, I pulled a face. Not like Robyn at all, reaching over and putting the light on seeing the empty bed “Robyn?” looking around the bedroom, she can’t be in the bathroom because the light is off there too. Walking into the room more confused, slowly placing my bag on the bed looking around and then seeing my clothes on the floor, a trail actually. I swallowed hard; did something break into the home. Putting the light on in the walk in closet and my clothes are on the floor “fuck” where has she gone, getting my phone out of my pocket panicking on where she has gone.
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Staring at Mel, Chris is on the phone to Mel because I have ignored his calls, so he called Mel “how do you not know where she is Chris? I don’t know where she is” Mel lied, I wonder how far is he going to go “I will try for you, ok bye” Mel disconnected the call “he is panicking sis, like when I said I don’t know she is supposed to be home he said I should know, like hell I should” my phone started ringing again “he is going to call me again, so he says because I am going to find out for him. He didn’t say why he just says she’s not home. Where is she, she should be home. What if someone has kidnapped her” rolling my eyes “now he cares, he hasn’t bothered since being in Canada but now he’s trying to move mountains. If he calls again I will pick up but honestly I should make him suffer for how he has done me, I just knew this whole trip would have been bad vibes because of the way he told me, I don’t want him to be Rihanna’ husband, I want him to have his own name but in the right way, anyways. I think it’s time I post” I smiled “oh yes, Melissa photography!” I grinned “let see how he feels when you post on Instagram and you don’t pick up, I am not saying about who took it though” looking down at my phone “I don’t mind” Mel said, she took a beautiful pictures of me with the sunsetting in the background. A side view of me, one hand just under my bump and the other arm just over my boobs. Bitch I was naked and what but it’s just a side view and it’s a nice ass picture, I smiled to myself adding a caption ‘Peace’ I wanted to keep it short, I did want to put just the two of us but it’s sparking drama so that is simple “that is now posted” I giggled to myself “it’s a beautiful picture, a black queen is going to give birth to a black queen and I love that for you” I am excited to know I am having a daughter.
That picture wasn’t even up for a second, he is calling me already, so the nigga has my notifications on clearly “that was quick, you know he is panicking” Mel is right he is, answering the call “yes?” I answered “I have been calling you! Least ten times now, what the fuck!” he shouted, “lower your tone, what is it?” oh the nigga is panicking, he is shouting so he has lost senses now “where are you!? Why is my clothes on the floor, where did you go without me knowing, are you serious? I thought someone took you, I panicked” he said out of breath “ok” I don’t care “ok? Robyn, I was scared. Where are you? I expected you home, this is stupid. And you posted a naked pictures, I told you about the body thing” I knew he would say that “so nigga?” I said, he is acting like I care “I get it, you’re angry with me but where are you. Come home” I sniggered “I am in Mexico” the line went silent “for what?” he said, his voice is less panicky now “I don’t know, last minute thing. You know how that goes” he did that to me “I will come to you, you went there alone!?” staring at Mel “yes” I lied, I think I will tell Mel to go because she doesn’t need to be involved in any of this “right, I will come there to you, like now” he can come I don’t care “make sure my house is clean before you think of leaving that house, I want the bed made, clothes picked and the washing done. And the floor needs cleaning Breezy” disconnecting the call “Mel you will need to go, he wants to come here. I don’t want you involved in any of it, neither of us can look to you for help. This is between me and him, he better clean that shit up” placing my phone on the table.
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jaehyunspeachparty · 5 years ago
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daddy jaehyun
iii.xvii. (m)
"Is that you?" Eunbi held out her smartphone and showed you an article from a Korean celebrity magazine. She was a fellow student and you hadn't talked to her very much yet. She was always nice and polite and you once exchanged transcripts. She was very young, maybe 20 years old, like your little sister Mia. "Uhm yes." It was an article about Jaehyun on Return of the Superman and a picture of you was also posted. You try to read about it for a moment, but Eunbi is too excited about it. "Oh my god, I can't believe it. I was wondering all the time why you got a Korean last name. I've always been a fan of NCT. Ahhh Jaehyun and Haechan are ... were .. are my bias." She didn't quite know how to express herself so as not to look disrespectful. "To be honest, I was a little bit sad when I found out that Jaehyun had married you. But ... wow ...you look so beautiful!" She talked and talked and could hardly breathe with excitement. You had never experienced anything like this before. "Hey Eunbi, could you maybe not tell anyone? Almost nobody in the university knows that and I would love it if it stays that way. Can it remain our secret?" At some point it had to come out anyway, but you wanted to have your privacy for as long as possible. "Yes, of course, I promise. I swear!!!!" She smiled and put her books on the table. "Thanks, that's really important to me." You smile kindly and turn a little to her. "I just can't believe it. I'm studying with Miga and Sunoh's mother. I love Return of the Superman. They're both so cute." Now she sat next to you and you found it all very exciting, because you never met someone like that yourself. It was always Jaehyun who gets the reaction. You have deliberately moved away from the media, especially since your miscarriage. "Thank you, yes they are both angels." The thought of your children made your heart warm. "Jaehyun seems to be such a good dad. I'm looking forward to a new episode of Return of the Superman coming out tomorrow." She was delighted, but at that moment Matthew came to you with a female colleague. "Are you talking about Return of the Superman?" You didn't really know her, she was in a higher semester, but she may be a good friend of Matthew's. "Yes. Do you watch the series too?" Eunbi smiled kindly and she was just cute in her way. But the other student laughed contemptuously. "What? No. I'm not looking at how parents sell their children to subordinate themselves to capitalist social structures." You had to cough after this statement and hope that you don't react too obviously. "Oh no, it's cute." Eunbin looked at the other woman in shock and tried to defend you also a little. "What is sweet about it? Let us now congratulate the men that they are finally get to know their children? In reality, women are still forced to stay at home in our society. In addition, how should the children lead a normal life? Especially those of former idols. They are already being put in the spotlight and what will become of them later. Like their parents idols? Are they also sexualized? When does that start? " You don't know what to say, you were simply shocked and couldn't say a word. But you didn't have to say anything because Mathew spoke. "In our pluralistic value system, it goes without saying that such things develop. But I am shocked that such industries still sell women and men, portray them as sex objects. Politics only want to keep us from the real problems with such conversations and everyone who supports this supports capitalism and the restriction of democracy." Eunbi looked at the two in shock. "Why do you put that on a political level? Can't someone just enjoy the music and the entertainment without losing social values?" This sweet soul was not only lovely but also super intelligent. "If you consume and support everything, you promote sexism and political secrecy. Who benefits from all of this?" Slowly this debate was too much for you and you feel more and more uncomfortable. "But that's normal business. I still enjoy their music and admire the work of the groups." Eunbin not only defended you and your husband, but also yourself. "Nevertheless, you support sexism and slavery. We have been fighting for women's rights for years and there we see girls jumping on stage in short skirts. They correspond to an ideal that we are not all. For example, I could not be tattooed." She pulled her sleeve up and she could see that her arm was completely tattooed, but then she pointed to you. "Or it would not be okay to be a bit fatter liker her...” She points to you. “...because a flat stomach and a very thin figure are required." You then had to cough. Apparently no one really noticed that you were pregnant, they just think you have just gained some weight. "Hey, that's going too far." Eubin was really angry now and at this moment you get a message from Jaehyun that he was in front of the university. "I'm sorry, I have to go now, unfortunately." You get up and smile. "Yes me too, I still have to learn." Eubin also got up and you leave the cafe together.
"I hope you don't take what they say seriously." Eunbi looked at you with concern and you both slowly left the campus. "No, I can't take things seriously from people who don't know what they're talking about." You smile and Eunbi seems calm. "And you're not fatter. If then it is me." She looks down at her sadly. Eunbi was a bit firmer and she took it all to heart. "That shouldn't be important. She should never have said a comment anyway." You smile and notice how angry Eunbi is. That's why you're trying to calm her down. When you were in the parking lot, you can already see the car, with darkened glasses, that had your license plate. "Jaehyun is already there, should we take you somewhere?" She was so nice all the time and you wanted to reciprocate. "What? No, no. I live here in a student dorm, that's only a bus station away." She smiled and you see the car door open and Jaehyun get out. "Shall we really not take you home." You wanted to offer it to her, but her eyes suddenly grew big and you feel Jaehyun's hand around your waist. Eunbi squeaked softly, turned stiffly and quickly ran away without saying anything. You had to laugh and turn to Jaehyun. "How are you? How are the two?" He kissed you gently and his hands stroked your stomach. "We're fine. Are you ready to see our babies?" You smile and put your hands over his neck. "I can’t wait any longer." He kissed you again and then you set off.
It was your next big check-up at the gynecologist. It was the next important appointment in which you will now find out whether everything is going according to plan. Since you can feel the little ones, you are now less worried than before. Jaehyun was almost more excited than you. When you were talking to the doctor, he held your hand all the time and you notice how restless he got. When the doctor started the ultrasound examination, he only looked at the screen. And when the gynecologist put the device on your stomach and you could see the two of them moving, you were completely fascinated. "I will now check the umbilical cord, the cervix, the amount of amniotic fluid, the placenta and the organs." She tried to explain everything to you, but you were only focused on the screen. You can feel the babies moving, but seeing it at the same time made you so happy. "I would now start with the 3D / 4D ultrasound. I have to know beforehand whether you want to know the gender or not." She replaced the device and you feel Jaehyun stroking your head. "We don't want to know it." You smile and the doctor immediately noted this in her files. "Okay, I'm starting now." You look at the screen again and you could hardly believe it. First, you could see their little feet. They were so tiny and while one baby was kicking, the other had crossed the little legs. Then the doctor zoomed in on their face. You could already see so much, there were just two little people in you. "Oh is that a dimple?" The calmer baby was now sucking on his thumb and it looked as if there was dimple on the cheek. "Maybe, but it doesn't have to be." The doctor examined everything further, but you don't really get any of it because it felt like a dream. "Imagine they would get your dimples as well as Sunoh." You smile and feel Jaehyun kiss your forehead. When the doctor zoomed out further, you could now see the whole stomach and you can see how close the two were. They lay side by side, head to head. It was incredibly cute. "Mr. and Mrs. Jung, the babies are in perfect condition. Everything seems to be perfect. There are no abnormalities. The babies have a perfect size and weight for twins. We are still waiting for your blood test, but I will only check your Blood sugar and iron level. But the babies are really fine." You were incredibly relieved to hear that. The gynecologist sent you the videos and photos by email and you head back to the car. "I am so relieved that everything is fine." You smile and buckle up. "Me too. I can't wait to show the kids." He looked at you and kissed you. At that moment you just feel happiness.
It was late now, but Johnny had managed to get all the children ready for bed. You were really excited that he had all three under control so well. "And they're in there?" Miga looks at the 3D ultrasound and cannot believe it. She taps your stomach and you can feel how one of the babies reacted to their sister. It's so sad for you that nobody else could feel it. Sunoh also had his hands on your stomach and giggled.  "Yeah, they're in Mummie's stomach." Jaehyun stroked his daughter's back and smiled. "Where are you?" She leaned forward and palpated you. "One is here and one is here." You draw along your stomach and Miga was totally thrilled. Her reaction was very different now than it was with Sunoh. But at that time she was still an only child and now she had developed into such a great big sister. "When can they get out?" She continued to ask curiously while Sunoh was already falling asleep in your arms. "It takes a little while, they have to grow a little bit. Now they are too small." This time Jaehyun explained it to her and slowly put her in bed. "Tell them to grow faster. I want to play with them." She giggled and you kiss her. After Miga had also fallen asleep, you two put Sunoh in bed and then goes down to the living room. "Would you like to watch another movie?" You ask your husband, he nodded and you make yourself comfortable on the couch together. You sit in front of him, your shoulder lies on his stomach, so he could stroke your belly. You pull a blanket over yourself because you have already gotten cold and you go through the films that are available. "Hey, can I join too?" Johnny came to you and Jaehyun waved him on the couch. You keep looking and in the end, you agree on a film that Johnny and you thought was good but Jaehyun found a little boring. 
Halfway through the movie, you hear a sigh and you know Jaehyun didn't think the movie was great. But you keep watching it when you suddenly feel Jaehyun's fingers a little further down and suddenly under your panties. You press your lips together when he starts massaging your clit under the blanket and you look briefly at Johnny, who was almost asleep. Jaehyun didn't respond at all, just kept looking at the TV. If the feeling gets too intense, you clear your throat to suppress your moaning. But Jaehyun didn't massage you too hard, so you won't get to orgasm right away. In between, he stopped and left you behind. But then he kept starting teasing you again. He then put a finger in you and you feel how needy you already are because your muscles around him contract tightly. You look up at him, but he keeps staring at the television, but at the same time you feel how he put his second finger in you and slowly you can't stand it any longer. "Jaehyun ..." You whisper while he only gives you a kiss on the head in response. He slowly pulled his fingers out of you and starts massaging your clit again. You went crazy, your whole body reacted. It felt like your whole panties were already completely wet. But then suddenly you hear Johnny and you startle for a moment. "Hmm, I think I should go to bed. Good night." He got up, yawned, and then left the living room. You wait until you hear the door that locked. Then you turn around very quickly and sit on Jaehyun's lap. "How can you tease me like this?" You put your hands on his chest and he just grinned. "It's your own fault if you choose such a boring film." He put his hands on the upper side of your thigh and pushed your sweater dress up so that your ass is free. "What if Johnny had noticed?" You start to grind on his middle and you can hardly stand the tension anymore. "That never bothered you in the dorm before." He winked and grabbed your ass. He was right, at that time he had done it often and you both had found it exciting to test limits. "Shit Jaehyun, I need your dick. Now. Inside me." He immediately took off his shirt as you pull his sweatpants down further. His length immediately jumped out and you don't hesitate a second and raise your hips to place it in front of you. Jaehyun put his hand on your ass again and pulled your panties aside with his fingers so that they weren't in the way. You sit down and feel full lust when you have completely absorbed his dick. "Fuck, you make me so hard." Jaehyun groaned and threw his head back. You put your hands on his chest to support yourself and start riding him. The feeling was incredible and you feel how you got closer to your climax. Jaehyun was louder this time too, his moans made it more intense. At some point, he wants more from you. While riding him but throwing your head back. He pushed your dress up so far that your breasts were free. He was playing with your swollen nipples and you feel that your orgasm would come soon. You wanted to lean forward to ride him faster, but when you lean your head forward again, you see someone standing in the room. "JAINA!" You cried out and quickly pulled your dress down. Jaehyun also turned and looked at the little girl who was staring at you with wide eyes. "Shit." Jaehyun swore as you climb down from him. You straighten your dress and walk towards the girl. Then suddenly she started to cry. "Mummy." She was looking for her mother because she missed her and you were so sorry for all of this. "Come on my little one, we're going to your daddy." She rubbed her eyes and nodded. 
Slowly you go back to the guest room with her and wake up Johnny, who then takes care of Jaina again. You go up and see Jaehyun waiting for you. "It can't go on like this. We can't do anything in our house anymore. We should enjoy the time before the twins come." You go up to him and kiss him. "It won't be long anymore." You try to calm him down, but Jaehyun was already pissed off. "But it's enough for me now.”
daddy jaehyun masterlist
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ahmedmootaz · 4 years ago
Note
Hello! I saw you request of requests, soooo. Can I request a story and it can be however long you want it to be. The sort of prompt is what you think would or want to happen in the upcoming episode “The Phantom and The Sorceress”. It’s fine even if you don’t answer this ask, thanks for all your content and theories!
Dear Anonymous,
What, did you think that just because I replied one day before the episode aired that I wouldn’t do it?...Well, I was debating it, but this was a fun one. I really hope you like it, because I spent quite a bit of effort on it.
Beware of possible spoilers, however. I mean, it is all prediction, but you never know when you’re right. So, here’s the link:
https://archiveofourown.org/works/26551864
And here is the magical Read More button, for those who need it (Note that Tumblr doesn’t copy italics, for some reason):
It was a dark, cold night in the Forest Of...whatever. Lena couldn't care less about what its name was. It was damp, awful, cold, and filled with monsters. No wonder Magica would hide here; it was basically her dream home. Maybe it was a mirror, too. She trudged with her friends, Violet and Webby, who'd oh-so-kindly volunteered to help her on this mad quest of hers. She was going mad, that's what, and they were both ready to go mad with her. She really was lucky when it came to friends.
They kept trudging in silence, not wanting to reflect on the series of what must've been unfortunate events to lead them to searching for Magica DeSpell in the dark, cold night in the middle of a swamp. An ugly swamp, too...though, now that she thought about it, there weren't really 'pretty' swamps, so it wasn't like Magica chose a bad one; they were all bad.
Despite telling herself several times how she was over this, how she had no issues whatsoever about what they were doing right now and that it was for the greater good, she found herself contemplating any other choice. Just what, exactly, led them to this point?!
...Well, they all knew. It was a rhetorical question. An angry rhetorical question. Leave it to the McDucks to be attacked by a literal video-game monster that crawled out of the screen and treating it like another boring day. Which...yeah, it kinda was for them, but she'd gotten used to the calmer household she moved in. It wasn't like that was the biggest thing that happened today, either, it was more like...the appetizer, even though that wasn't really a correct statement, since it was like eating a whole roast duck only to be told it was an appetizer.
Still, it wasn't the tentacle-monster which they took down that led to this situation. It was the fact that Gladstone...Gladner? Something along those lines, showed up. Apparently, he was the boys' uncle, which made him someone she didn't know. Not that it mattered anyway, he came in, crying about how his luck left him forever before weeping on her arm, which was conveniently next to him. Her sleeve was never going to return to regular levels of salt after this.
It took a while before Scrooge managed to calm him down. It seemed like his luck...which was a thing she didn't know about, had left him. Normally, she was told, they would've chalked it up to some paranormal mystery and had to excuse themselves and send her home, but it went further then that...Almost everyone in Duckburg was losing their abilities.
They didn't really believe it at first, but when Scrooge's monetary abilities started going blank, the alarms blared loudly enough in everyone's minds. It wasn't just him, too; Gyro was losing his intelligence, so was Huey, Mrs.Beakly lost a good portion of her Agent skills, and Dewey lost the ability to Dewey, whatever the heck he meant by that.
It only left her and the rest of Team Magic to fend for themselves and figure out what was draining their powers. There was one teeny-tiny problem, however:
How would they do that? Webby was an amazing fighter, but their enemy, a certain Phantom Blot that Violet heard about, didn't leave a trace, much less a body to fight, and despite Violet's best efforts, nothing came out of her investigations to find where he hid, which left Lena to do the job. One issue, however: She couldn't.
She was a brilliant sorceress, or so she bragged, but there was still much she needed to learn before casting detection spells. And they, she theorized, didn't have that time. Violet was an amazing step-sister and a scarily fast learner, but even she came up empty-handed when it came to learning anything about that power. That left one magic user in Duckburg she knew. Ugh.
She shivered at the memory, snapping out of her mind due to some whimpering from Gladstone. He said he needed to find his luck or else he was a goner. She thought he was exaggerating at first, but then a boat nearly fell on him. 4 Kilometres away from sea. He promised he'd do them anything if she let him accompany them on this treacherous journey while the rest of the gang tried investigating using their own ways, and the agreed. How bad could he be, anyways?
-"U-Um...Lena? I don't know how to tell you this...but I...I hate swamps. I don't think I know how to walk in them. It was always my luck helping me out. I'm cold, scared, and humiliated."...well, not too bad, but he just wouldn't shut up! And while he seemed to amuse Webby and Violet, he was just getting on her nerves.
-"Well, nobody here likes swamp, either! And you've been listing the things your luck did for you for two hours now, is there anything you can do on your own, Mr.Gladstone?", she shot back, irked.
He used to argue and bicker with her, but as his luck kept worsening throughout the day (How on earth does one get mauled by a bear, an alligator, and then receive a speeding ticket because the alligator's death-roll was too fast??), he mostly stuck to paranoia to help himself. She couldn't help but feel bad for him, despite how much he annoyed her.
-"W-Well...I used to breathe well on my own...I could also walk...I think...", he mumbled, his voice a broken mess compared to his arrogant and proud tone, or so she was told by Webby. "A-And...I think I might need to learn how to go to the bathroom in the swamp.", he added, his exhaustion overpowering his embarrassment.
-"Pffft, don't worry about it, Gladstone! The entire swamp is your bathroom! You're basically the King of the swamp!", and there it was, the perky, energetic voice that was trying to keep Gladstone away from depression this entire trip.
-"Oh, quit with the lies! I am nothing without my luck!", he cried, seeming on the verge of tears for the...seventeenth time today? Lena couldn't remember. "B-But...It wasn't my choice! My luck was always there for me! Like...Like a-a stick! Something to lean on my entire life and now it is gone!", he lamented, slouching as his footsteps got a bit slower. For the sake of all them, Lena hoped he regained any of his luck soon.
-"Well, it is true; any being born with a condition, abnormal or not, that aids him throughout his life without any major work done from the part of the being will eventually get used to this condition, which could explain why you're taking this particular misadventure hard, Mr.Gladstone.", Violet bumped in their chat, checking the notepad on which they brainstormed the possible locations of Magica. "Still, I'd advise you to remain positive, as I sense we may be able to fix these conditions.", she added, giving him a small, encouraging smile which he didn't notice.
-"Yeah, probs.", the teenage witch agreed after she felt a nudge from the Vanderquack. Anything to cheer up her friend's friends' uncle. "Hey Vi, are we close or not?", she asked, trying to ignore the eye-roll from her shorter friend.
-"Well, I don't have a particularly detailed map, though I imagine that Magica would mark her camp with a particular sign; an X on the ground, perhaps, or perhaps we must deduce it from the surrounding environment-"
-"Or she might've carved her face on the bottom of an ancient tree!", the cheerful duck happily announced as they entered a clearing with a small dirt road that led to the mouth of Magica DeSpell. A wooden carving of her, anyway.
It was just as Webby said, large, reeking of pride and arrogance, and yet...oddly well done. The details were really nice and actually looked like Magica. If she had to give her 'aunt' something, it had to be that she apparently didn't suck at something in her life. Really though, wood carving, of all things? Was she a carpenter before becoming an evil, awful witch? Is she talented? She didn't have her magic...maybe she had someone else with her.
-"Alright, so, is everyone prepared to meet my homicidal aunt?", the tallest duckling asked with fake happiness, receiving a nod form everyone but Gladstone, who emitted  something of a sniff. Webby readied the axe she brought with her, patting the kitten at the top while Violet tightened her garlic necklace, while Gladstone...he stood there, steadying his back a bit. "Mr.Gladstone?"
-"Ah, forget about it, whatever she does to me, it can't be worse than having an anvil hit me from ten-meters.", he steadied his tone, managing to make it more bitter than desperate. Well, at least he wasn't going to cry when they see her.
She looked back at the tree's base, blocking out the various memories that gave her the urge to blast the door, and knocked. Harshly. Hey, she was going to give herself something. She felt both Webby and Violet's hands on her shoulders, and she anticipated the door opening. Now or never...they were going to convince her, and somehow, she didn't think it was going to be too easy.
Her mind raced, imagining all the awful things she could be plotting right now. She heard garlic was harmful to magic users, something she didn't know too much about, but was apparently true, as she figured out when her magical powers suddenly dimmed as she touched some garlic. Still, Magica could hit them form a distance...and what about that axe? Was going physical the ideal plan? Was-
 CRASH!
The quartet of ducks yelled, jumping back before they realized the door didn't even open. It was something from the inside. Someone, to be exact. A couple of curses came through the door as a metallic sound came through as well.
-"Bloody Hell! Who comes in this hour of the night, in this swamp, to this tree?! I don't even pay bills!", the angry yelling of her not-really-aunt came through. Yep, that was about the attitude she expected. "If you're the Magical Supplies Shop, I'm sorry, but if you couldn't tell, I lost my powers after following a wonderful plan of mine. I cannot pay you in whatever things you want. Now go away before I shoot you!", she answered with a sickeningly sweet tone. Even her voice brought Lena awful memories and forced her to frown.
-"You can do this, Lena. You faced her down before. She can't do anything to you.", Violet squeezed her shoulder, giving her a determined smile. Lena shot one back, before taking a step closer to the door.
-"Hey, this is Lena...Your...", she sighed, bringing a hand to her temple. "Niece?", she finished, awaiting a sick laughter or an undignified scowl at her for attempting to break free from being a shadow. Sorry-not-sorry, Magica. For moment, there was silence. Then there was laughter. Hysterical laughter. So much laughter Lena felt scared.
-"Ooooh, good one, person-who-is-trying-to-fool-me! I don't have a niece! My brother is dead and my sister cannot keep a worm alive! Now scram before my patience runs out!", she thundered from behind the door, leaving the ducklings and Gladstone in shock.
-"She has a brother?", Lena repeated with incredulity, looking at her two friends and Gladstone.
-"I don't know! How should I know? I thought she didn't have family!", Violet answered with equal confusion, shrugging.
-"I mean, technically she doesn't have a brother anymore.", Gladstone chimed in, his voice devoid of any enthusiasm. "Who's this woman anyway? And why does she sound like she woke up on the wrong side of the bed?", he asked, raising his voice a tad too much.
-"The wrong side of the bed?!", came the war-cry from behind the door, only leaving a moment before a couple of locks unlocked and it swung outwards, revealing Magica DeSpell . With a shotgun. Oh, well this was just lovely, wasn't it? "Alright, that does it, I will put more holes than you than there is in...swiss...cheese...", her speech slurred, looking at the three ducklings in front of her house.
The silence remained for a moment, with no one doing anything. Webby brandished her weapon, Violet made a threatening expression, and Lena ignited a spark in her hand. And Gladstone stood there, trying to take all this in. That moment gave Lena enough time to admire Magica's hut; a three-room lodging, more aptly. It was basically a sink, a gas-cooker, and some drawers, a wardrobe, and a bookshelf, all locally-made, apparently. There was also a toilet and a bath in the background. It was a pretty sorry place to live in, but it seemed functional enough.
-"Hi, Aunt Magica.", Lena greeted, gritting her teeth and delivering the widest, fakest smile she could possibly give. "I almost forgot how you looked! We haven't seen each other in such a long time. What a shame.", she continued, trying her best to remain calm and to look the elder sorceress in the eyes. Said sorceress was now surveying the ducks surrounding her, measuring her chances and keeping her hands on the shotgun's trigger.
-"Get out. Now!", the cape-wearing duck yelled, looking dangerously close to a rage-fit. "All three of you. Now!"
-"Three? Hello? I may have lost my luck, but I am certainly not invisible, lady!", Gladstone announced with an undignified tone. He got a glare that shut him up. "Yeah, sure, okay, talk with the people who really matter. Why wouldn't you?", he grumbled bitterly.
-"Listen, as much as we'd love to, we can't really do that.", the younger sorceress laid her hand on her waist, looking both bored and uncaring. At least, she hoped she did. The last thing she needed was for the awful, horrible duck in front of her to sense any weakness, something she assumed she excelled at.
-"Besides, we're already outside! Your evil mind trick won't work on us!", Webby boasted, swinging her axe a bit for intimidation purposes. They didn't seem to work all too well, but at the very least, they made Magica's shotgun point at her just a tiny bit. Was that a victory?...Probably not.
-"Fine then, get away from me! From this place! The last thing I need is to spend my night with a bunch of *McDucks*.", the gun-wielder practically screamed, her veins starting to bulge from the anger. Her voice was laced with venom dripping off of every word. It was honestly both terrifying and admirable how much hate she poured into every word.
-"I told you we can't.", Lena repeated calmly, trying to avoid a fight she saw she was coming.
And then, just as she hoped things would calm down, a loud, roaring BANG! filled the swamp. Every single member of her group jumped, looking frightened as they searched around for wounded. There were none, only four ducks staring at each other. She'd tricked them. And she didn't even have her magic. Lena frowned and turned her face back to her shadow's origin. Her...uh...creator? She was her shadow, did shadows have creators? Maybe a caster was a better term? As much as she hated it, 'Aunt Magica' rolled off the tongue far better than 'Caster Magica'.
-"Are you searching for fight? Because I'm not certain your chances would be very high with the four of us.", Violet spoke for her step-sister. Her new room-mate at this point, but Lena still appreciated the gesture with all of her heart. It appeared Magica actually fired a shot, even if it was only a warning shot. Everyone tried to make good on that statement, looking as threatening as they could. Even Gladstone lifted his fists, adding a grand total of 4% to how threatening they were.
-"Maybe you are! Why can't you get away from me? What do you want? I don't have any more plans for the moment, I didn't do anything illegal for the last month, and you're taking my books from my cold, dead, hands!", the former-Sorceress Of The Shadows barked back defiantly, still pointing at them with her gun. "I don't care if you kill me! I'll take at least two of you down before I-"
-"Could you shut up?!", Lena cried out, her eye twitching and doing everything she could to not attack Magica. "We're here because...because...", she couldn't say it. She couldn't bring herself to ask her for help.
-"...You want to buy something?", her 'aunt' guessed, gun still pointing at her head, but apparently curious.
-"No."
-"You want to brag?"
-"...No.", okay, maybe they did, but they couldn't do that. Not now, anyway.
-"Are we here to rent the room?", Gladstone chimed in, scratching his head. Lena was certain Violet explained to him on the way here...but he apparently forgot.
-"I NEED YOUR HELP!", there, she spat it. She couldn't believe she said it, covering her face afterwards. She felt Violet's hand pat her and heard Webby saying something along the lines of 'There, there'.
-"...I'm sorry? Is this...Listen, it's the middle of September, the swamp is humid as all Hell and I'm trying to set up a fan, if you're just here to brag,", she said before adding 'as you McDucks do.' under her breath, "Then you can come sometime else, these garments aren't exactly fun to wear when the humidity is 85% today so-"
-"No, we need the help. But you'd better watch your back, you witch, because if you try to betray us, I'll shove this axe right down your head!", Webby warned threateningly, patting the kitten once more. Magica actually remained silent and judged what she said, and Lena decided it was time to uncover her face again.
-"And why would you need my help?", the witch repeated, lowering her weapon. Lena could just feel smugness radiating off of her, and she hated it with every molecule of her being.
-"There's a thief in town. He's stealing everyone's abilities. Everything about them. He's stealing it. He calls himself the Phantom Blot.", Violet answered, looking rather impatient with Magica, who smiled with a hum.
-"And why should that concern me?", she smugly inquired and...well, she wasn't wrong. Lena hated that she wasn't wrong.
-"The Phantom Blot hates magic and its users. He wants to eradicate the both of them and you, if I remember correctly, are a witch, yes?", the hummingbird explained, gaining a bit more of a reaction this time: A chuckle. They really couldn't find anyone else, huh?
-"Listen, Purple, if you can remember so well, then you might as well remember that Lena over there stole all of my power. I'm in no danger of this Phantom Blot.", she shot back, a taunting smile on her beak and crossing her arms.
-"Alright, listen up you freak, maybe you don't realize this, but he doesn't know that you don't have your powers. All he knows is that you were the single biggest magical spell to hit this town less than a year ago. I'd say you're still on his hit list.", not taking any more of this back-and-forth, the younger sorceress quipped, closing her hands together and trying a smirk of her own to counter the furious frown and growl her 'aunt' gave her.
-"And you're still on our hit list, you monster! So don't try to even think about doing anything funny!", Webby added, giving her best-friends a reassuring smile, though a somewhat threatening one.
-"I don't think I care about that too much."...she didn't? Oh. Well. There goes the entire base of their plans. "My family isn't here, neither is my home, I don't have my powers, I struggle to eat half-decent food, and I can't even make any new plans after that piece of-", she stopped herself, "Sorry, after Glomgold took everything I had monetarily. In other words, life isn't looking too great for me.", she finished indifferently, though a bit sad and bitter. Huh. That's...really odd. Bitter yes, but sad? Lena wouldn't have ever expected that from her.
-"Tough luck, lady. There's a great pharmacy that sells anti-depressants on the next corner. You know. If you're like me and lost all the joy your life ever had.", the former-luckiest duck in the world suggested darkly, pointing a thumb somewhere. "Look, I don't know you, you don't know me, but please just do me a favour, alright? I need your help. Magic or whatever I just...I just need my luck bad. I need my life back. Can you please help us for the good of your heart?", he got down on his knees and begged, not showing too much emotion, but just enough to almost make you forget his bitterness a moment ago. Almost.
-"...Yeah, listen, the 'good of my heart' doesn't really exist, and even if it did, then I won't be giving it to you of all people.", well...Lena couldn't say she wouldn't say something similar to some duck she barely even knew. Unlike Magica, however, she'd actually accept. Probably. "But it seems Scrooge's thinking isn't there quite yet for all of you.", she stated, almost with disappointment, as she brought two fingers to her temple. "My life at this point is in danger...but that's not really what's motivating me here. What do I have to gain?", ah, straight to the point, are we?
-"What, keeping your life isn't enough for you?", her former-shadow snarked back, utilizing the opportunity to show no respect whatsoever. Ah, that felt good. It didn't feel good to see her nemesis laugh at her, however, as if she knew something she didn't.
-"Now, I may be misunderstanding this, but you don't have much time, yes? Phantom Bolt or whatever is already striking. Both of our lives are endangered, and if it means taking you out...well, I don't need to say much, eh?", oh, how Lena hated the smugness in her voice. They'd accounted for this, but she just wanted to punch her in her stupid beak so much!
-"Fine, does this make you any more inclined?", the younger witch pulled out a purple gem, dangling it from her finger and immediately making Magica's pupils widen.
-"My Sumerian Amulet!", she yelled, throwing herself on Lena, though not with so much force the latter wasn't able to repel her. Indeed, all the younger duckling had to do was raise a hand as her 'aunt' tried grabbing the amulet that was dangling so close to her.
-"There, feeling a bit more excited now?", the intelligent, sharp voice of Violet observed. "We know how much this means to you. Maybe you could even regain your magic with it, yes? This is as much as we're going to offer, so if you don't want it..."
-"...Fine!", came the near-instant response. Magica was biting her lower beak, looking majorly conflicted. "Alright, you have some of ol' Scroogie in you. You want my help? Fine. Fine, no really. How about we seal the deal, then? I help you with whatever it is you want to beat the Phantom Blot, you give me back my Sumerian Amulet, and we all try to kill each other sometime later, affaire conclue?", she extended a fingerless-ly gloved hand, looking all-too-gleeful about all of this. Lena knew the amulet was powerful, but the way Magica accepted their offer...it gave her second thoughts about giving her the amulet.
-"It means 'deal?', Mr.Gladstone.", she heard her step-sister tell the triplets' uncle. Apparently, he wasn't too fond of Magica's new terminology...but then again, neither was Lena. "Though I must wonder how you know of French, Magica.", the short hummingbird muttered as she extended a hand alongside the other three ducks.
-"I have some Savoyard cousins. You're not the only ones with a family here.", came the dry answer.
It took a moment of hesitation, with everyone almost certain that the other side will pull out at the last second. Then, suddenly, Webby's hand went forward and shook, or rather, grabbed Magica's. Violet soon followed, and Gladstone did as they did. That only left Lena, who stared at Magica. If she shakes this hand...she'll take orders from her again. She'll give her the amulet that will make her able to hurt her again. She didn't want to do this...but she had to. Not only for herself, but for her friends. For everyone who depended on her, she took a breath and forced her hand to shake with Magica's. It was...huh. Wow. Her fingers were tiny compared to Lena. How did she never notice?
-"Lovely. Now, you're trying to go after this Phantom Whatever, yes?", the cape-drapped witch asked, looking a bit more enthusiastic. She received a nod from everyone, Gladstone included. "Very well, I can make you an elixir to poison him, though it's going to take some-"
-"Woah woah woah, we're trying to defend ourselves here! Not everyone is a murderer like you!", Lena objected, waving her arms frantically just as her 'aunt' was going to enter her hut. She earned a disapproving stare. She hated them.
-"He's going to kill you, Lena. You're being naïve if you think showing kindness is going to change someone who's bent on murdering you.", the sorceress mocked, resting her hand on her hip. "Besides, why come here in the first place if you're all such big fans of Gandhi?"
-"We want you to teach Lena spell.", Webby replied, her axe still unsheathed, though it only gained an unimpressed look as her enemy got used to it. "We can defeat the Phantom Blot without resorting to your methods, and you'll see that yourself!", she proudly continued, lifting the axe a little higher.
-"A spell?", Magica repeated, mystified. "You...You want me to teach you a spell?! To be back where I belong? To rejoin my magical destiny-", oh, come on. Couldn't she stay clam for five minutes? Why was she acting like a hyperactive child all of sudden? That wasn't how she was supposed to act!
-"Yes, yes, all of that. Now if you could just-"
-"Ooooh, it feels good to be back!", deciding that two could play at the interruptions game, she ignored her 'niece' as she wrapped her cloak around her, covering her beak and moving her fingers for dramatic effect.
-"You are exhausting to be around, you know that?", Lena quipped, glaring at the far-too-gleeful duck in front of her.
-"I try. Now, what spell do you exactly want?"
-"We were thinking about trying a spell to locate the Phantom Blot.", Violet explained, and Lena couldn't help but notice Magica tilted her head just a teeny tiny bit. "We want to know where he is, and if possible, bring him to us.", she clarified, her dignified tone not wavering.
-"You seem worried, witch. Are you worried because you're trying to play us and now you can't?", Webby interrogated with her 'detective accent', looking suspicious to Magica's current indescribable expression.
-"No, it's not that, it's just...Locating people and things is more of a Teleporter thing...", she answered, almost begrudgingly.
-"Welp, we came to the wrong person. I told you! We needed a teleporter, we have a witch. And we made a deal. This is just fan-tastic.", ever the positive one, Lena ranted as she started walking around, waving her arms, exasperated.
-"Of course it would be you to not know magic-branches, Lena.", her 'aunt' scolded, noticing Webby's sudden axe-swing and trying to ignore the obvious threat. "Teleporting is magic. Just a branch of it. I'm more talented in the spells branch and the alchemy branch, alongside shadow-manipulation, of course. Teleporting...well, I can help you. I tried learning it, after all.", she boasted, mumbling the last part to herself more than to the ducklings surrounding her.
-"Branches, huh...And how can we know you're not just messing with us? You could be saying absolute mallarcky!", the seater-wearing duck accused, earning an undignified huff from the older sorceress.
-"I said I tried learning it, and not without some success.", she claimed, hoping to satisfy Lena's questions and just get closer to getting the darn amulet. She didn't. "Listen, my brother was a pretty good Teleporter. I'll tell you what he told me, alright?", she explained further, noticeably uncomfortable with what she was saying.
-"How come I never heard of him if he's so go-"
-"Because you've never spent more than two months in Europe, you brat! Don't you dare talk about the King Of Napoli like that!", she screamed, looking more threatening by the second. A full-blown beatdown was about to ensue if it wasn't for Gladstone, of all people.
-"Hey...I remember that name...He stole my car when I was on a trip in Europe! And my newly-won crown which I won in Barbaria!", he recounted, looking far-too-happy for what he was saying.
-"Bavaria.", Violet corrected.
-"Whatever, he just teleported in my car and stole it after throwing me out! And he had someone else with him, too!", the former-luck king continued, still looking inexplicably happy. "I never thanked him for his service! Some old lady saw the accident and thought I needed help, so she gave me one of her luxury jets to console me! Told me nobody was safe from the King Of Napopi.", he finished, a smile on his face. "That was before the whole...unlucky thing...", and now he was going to be depressed again.
-"See? Now just listen to what I tell you and you should be fine!", the elder duck ordered, apparently unable to sense the internal moment of struggle Lena had before she obeyed, taking a step forward.
-"Yes...Magica.", she muttered under her breath, standing in front of her arch nemesis' cold stare. Her friends were there to protect her. There was nothing to fear. Nothing to fear at all. This was just a forced training session. She was going to get through this.
-"I'd appreciate it if you call me Miss Magica.", and yet it didn't seem like her momentary teacher was willing to make this easy for the both of them. Holding her sly smile, she straightened her back and looked at her forced-apprentice for a second. "Let your magic run through you. Teleportation is a complex art, and all its branches need a constant flow of magic through one's self. Location is no different, let the magic run through your body.", she stated, trying to throw her cloak in a dramatic way.
-"Okay so...like this?", the tallest duckling asked, holding her right arm in front of her and sensing the tingling sensation of magic as it coursed through her. She came to control it after a multitude of attempts, so this wasn't much of a trial. "Oh, and since I might as well milk you for whatever you're worth, can I change this colour? I hate this purple.", she wondered, noting that she didn't get any reply before forcing her vocal cords to add "Miss Magica?"
-"Hmm, well, I don't know, the colour of one's magic is determined by both their will and their chosen Branch of Magic, I had to go through lots of training to change my magic's colour, and since this is my magic,", she pointed at the flame-like purple shape that surrounded her 'niece', "It's going to take a lot of time for you to change it back. But it's no special technique. Some can immediately change it, others cannot. It comes eventually.", she continued indifferently, paying attention to the magic that was radiating off of Lena.
-"Don't talk to Lena like that!", the Vanderquack reaffirmed her stance on Magica as she exchanged glares with the now-dysfunctional sorceress.
-"Webs, it's fine. I can deal with her.", her best-friend answered, turning her attention back to her teacher. Oh, how she hated that she had to refer to her as that! Nevertheless, she was surprised she actually got an answer. She expected some insults and nothing else, but it seemed that once they had a deal...she worked with it. It was...unnerving.
-"When it comes to searching for something, you must see it with your blind eye. You must both wish for it, see it in your mind, and release enough magical surges to clear the way for you. Only then will you sense where what you search for lies. For example, I have a red neckerchief in my house with a raven on it in my home. Try sensing where it is.", the DeSpell explained emotionlessly, guiding Lena a bit closer to her home.
She closed her eyes, as she was told, and tried seeing the neckerchief. Red...raven...yep, pretty plain alright. And yet...she tried releasing energy as she was told, but the only thing that was getting released was a bunch of aimless magical balls that deflated on the ground. She couldn't sense anything. She had the image in her brain, but she couldn't really...get 'it', if that made any sense.
-"Not good. As expected, you cannot properly use my magic. Perhaps you need to be more emotionally motivated to feel the 'click'?", of course it would be like Magica to benefit off this situation. Of course. Well, at least she was partially right. Lena grunted as a response, not wanting to give her trainer any more satisfaction than necessary. "Then we must up the risks a bit.", the elder sorceress claimed moving a bit to where her friends stood.
-"Listen here, Magica! Lena's trying her best, and we have no need for you! If you ever- Hey! My...bow...", in an instant, there was a 'splash'. The eldest of the ducklings turned around to see Webby without her iconic bow staring into the stagnant water of the swamp, shocked and furious at the same time. "That was a gift from my grandma!", she yelled back.
-"Oh, quit it, you want to help your oh-so-precious friends, yes? Then let me teach!", the witch shot coldly, evading an axe swing with relative ease, watching as the energetic duckling gritted her beak; they had no one to trust but her. "Now, Lena, this swamp is filled with alligators and all sorts of nasty creatures. If we don't find Debby's bow in five minutes, it might as well be gone forever. If you can find where I threw it, I'll go get it myself. Sounds good?", too good. Especially that last part. In fact, only that last part, since Lena had little faith that she could succeed.
When everyone around her went silent, the young witch turned her head to Webby. She looked distraught. Closing her eyes once more, she faced the swamp and tried sensing for the bow. Pink, small, and plain. It was a rather noticeable part of Webby. Something that clearly meant a lot for her. If she could find it...Then she'd have helped her friends. She saw it...she willed it...and she started releasing magical sparks. For a moment, just like last time, they merely deflated.
Then, all of a sudden...she felt 'it'. A guiding feeling...like an arm on her shoulders. It made her open her eyes, but she could still see the bow. She saw it. She felt it. It was pulsing...the pulsing pushed her to where it came from:...Away from the water? It was behind her. But the only thing behind her was...she turned around to look at Magica, who had a detestably smug expression on her face as she showed Lena her fingerless-ly gloved left hand. The glove had a small bulge near the wrist.
-"Seems as if I was correct.", was all she said. Lena didn't growl or frown this time. She had no reason to. It slightly angered her to agree with her 'aunt', but as far as correctness went, there wasn't much to critique here. "I learnt this little trick as a little girl. It can help you in a tough spot.", she added as she removed it from under her glove, throwing it into her student's hand. "There, I made good on my promise, right?"
...She did?...Well, yes, she did teach her. Lena thought that she didn't mention some things, such as the formula or how much energy one should dedicate, but in the end, those details were all discovered by her apprentice with no need for more external help. She, should she follow the instructions correctly, was now technically able to find the Phantom Blot.
Then why did she feel something wrong? She felt as if something wasn't quite...right, to put it simply. She expected a bigger fight with Magica. Harsher treatment. Little to no emotions, but it was just...meh. Nothing too big. She stared again the the elder witch. She was smiling. It was a smug smile alright, but it was a smile. It wasn't something she expected to see of Magica. Perhaps as a result of her disdain for her 'aunt' she, too, came to see her as incapable of being a person.
-"I guess so...", she murmured, knowing exactly where her former-teacher at this point was going. She prepared her amulet, not wishing to give it away. "Her name is Webby, by the way.", she added, not getting a response
-"I told you my brother was a good teacher.", her fifteen-minute trainer mumbled, more to herself than to anyone else, and Lena felt awkward. She stared back at her friends.
-"I...uh. Sorry about him. Dying. I guess.", she whispered but it caught the attention of Magica, and she looked positively shocked. "Don't look so shocked. Respect the dead and all that.", that came out wrong. So wrong. If she meant to disrespect him, she couldn't have done worse.
-"Heh...listen, sometimes faking death is a bit easier with magic on your side. If you're willing to share a bit more than the amulet, then maybe I can tell you about him.", she smiled again, though this was one of her more typical smiles, if still an actual smile. Huh. Curious
But just as the newly trained sorceress was about to say something, a 'zap' echoed in the swamp. There was light for a moment, and Magica had to jump to avoid the bolt that zapped a part of her hair and neck. Everyone turned in a split second to see a black-clothed figure with green eyes and a metallic glove on his right hand.
-"And I was just about to pick this four-leaved clover, too...", was the only sentence uttered for a solid minute. And by Gladstone of all people.
The Phantom Blot looked menacing. Pure, undiluted, unadulterated intimidation radiated off of his clothed figure. From afar, you wouldn't be blamed if you thought he was a medieval executioner. The metallic glove on his hand looked more electronic than medieval on closer inspection, but that didn't matter too much. His eyes, fully green by some method, conveyed little emotions, but there's something Lena sensed from him: Hatred.
-"Finally...", his clunky, distorted and terrifying voice announced, his footsteps calculated and his eyes focused. "It seems my searching has led me to the most vile of beings, at last.", he added, closing his fist.
-"The most vile of beings? Listen, I heard some nasty things about ducks, but come on man-", Gladstone tried countering, only to receive a bolt that knocked him over, making him grunt.
-"Not you, you imbecile! These WITCHES!", he cried, hatred drenching his words as he advanced. He most certainly had an accent...But Lena couldn't just pin-point it...though she thought she heard it sometime in the past...
-"These what now?", Magica repeated, apparently offended.
-"WITCHES!", he repeated, not slowing his advance as the group of ducks slowly backed off. "You come in with your magic, destroy cities with your undeserved power, and you...you're never satisfied! You always want more! You never leave something to the people who work for their power!", he ranted shooting a couple of bolts that forced the group the yell and retreat further to Magica's hut.
-"Oh. Witches. I think I still hate you, but a little less than when I thought you said-"
-"It would just be like you to show up now, huh?!", back to interrupting Magica, it was Lena who couldn't keep it in her head anymore. "I spend an hour with Magica to learn how to find you and you just show up like that?! Couldn't you have came in a little early?! Do you have any idea what kind of deal we made?!", she complained, ranting at him, and forcing him to do a double take on her words.
-"Not only are you a witch, but you are a sore loser. I could make my nonna's pasta with that much salt!", he mocked, doing a small laugh that almost sounded dead...like, the whole laughing part was there, but there was no spirit behind it. Just a sick, twisted glee.
-"Hey, hold it there for a minute, you're italian?", Magica asked, flabbergasted. Ah. Right. Sometimes Magica lost control of her British accent in front of Lena. Now she remembered. But really? This was the thing she asked about? Why would that matt-
-"Indeed, and my heart shall always remain there! It is why I find great pleasure and cleaning Napoli of your filth!", he growled, firing another shot which she barely avoided but backing her into the tree where her hut was located.
-"Oooh, you're digging your own grave here, you Blot! I am a proud Neapolitan, and the mere name is much more than wherever you're from!", she challenged, pointing an accusing finger as the other ducks stared at each other. They didn't know what exactly was unfolding in front of them, but it couldn't have been anything good.
-"Don't you dare insult Genova, you wretch!", he shot back, almost losing his nerves for a second before calming down. "No. I am much better than losing my nerves to a fiend like you! Prepare for justice!", he suddenly declared, and the speed of it made Magica unable to dodge the bolt he fired, punching her into Gladstone, who tried hiding behind her, and throwing the both of them into the trunk of her tree. She fell down with a hard 'crack', leaving Gladstone in a duck-shaped impression.
-"Wh-Why me...?!", he lamented before falling. The sorceress tried getting up but she limped.
-"Magica!", Lena yelled. Why did she yell? Why could she possibly yell?...Because if she dies, he's going after them. Definitely. She ran, trying to raise a shield to protect her from another, more frightening zap that would've hit her. Heck, even then, it shattered Lena's shield. Crud, this guy really isn't messing around anymore. But then a pink figure shined behind the Phantom. Yes! Webby was doing it!
-"How's this for justice!", she cried from behind him as she jumped, but he was good. Too good. He managed to spin his entire figure, raise his mechanical weapon and take a fighting pose at once, stopping his assailant's hit. Oh. This guy wasn't going to be any fun, was he?
-"You...Hah! It wasn't enough!", he bragged, pulling the battle-axe from his glove as his previous wielder suffered from the vibrations of hitting a metal. One powerful grab and swing from his glove sent Webby back to her friends, face in the dirt, and with no weapon.
-"What kind of justice are you hoping to achieve?!", cried Violet, hoping to buy them some time. It didn't work, and he only accelerated his assault, firing multiple electrical charges or whatever these were, forcing the ducks to separate.
-"Justice is not my primary concern, hummingbird. I am a criminal, after all, but if I can do my job and rid the world of this evil, then I shall take the initiative!", he calmly replied, not paying any attention to the fact that most of them were getting zapped or were running in terror. "But enough playing around, I do not wish to fail now!", he stopped, preparing what seemed to be a worse, more powerful form of his weapon.
-"Lena, do you think we can take him on?", Violet asked, trying to get them regroup.
-"Nope."
-"Webby, do you have any more weapons?", she turned to the Vanderquack, trying to assume to role of the leader.
-"Don't really think they're going to affect him.", she answered pulling out a few knives that looked like toothpicks comapred to her axe.
-"Mr.Gladstone-"
-"Don't have my luck; can't do anything.", came the reply.
-"...Magica?", she asked her voice a bit desperate.
-"My shotgun has one more round in it.", she declared, pointing it at their attacker, who finished upgrading himself and was about to shoot once again. "We're going to die, aren't we?"
-"Probably.", Lena answered her, watching the black-wearing man as he began shooting at them again.
Well. Nothing else to do but to face the music, as they say. Whoever 'they' is. And whatever that meant. And whatever that had to do with their situation. Oh, give her a break. She didn't have time to think about this fight of theirs. Magic versus one very wronged, apparently, and angry man and his technology. The fight of the century.
The Phantom versus The Sorceress. Time to see how long they can stay alive.
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bow-woahh · 5 years ago
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She-Ra Fics Masterlist
(It’s 100% Catradora but hey)
Started: 12/10/19 Last updated: 28/10/20
Multi-chapters:
Catradora —
What drove her insane... (Canon Divergent)(Completed) (4/4)(13k+)(Ao3 only)
There were a lot of things Adora would do that would get to Catra. A lot of things that would make Catra melt inside or combust. Or both. Things that would make her feel this intense feeling in her stomach, these flips, these... butterflies, is what she thought of them as.
Similarly, Adora didn't think she had many weaknesses, but most things Catra would do drove her up the wall. In a good way. In the best way. In a way that made her heart feel like it was about to hop out of her ribcage, that made her feel she was about to faint, from an unfamiliar, yet familiar, dazed dizziness.
Both of them drove each other insane.
Heal me after hurting (Modern AU)(Completed) (3/3)(29k+)(Ao3 only)
A million feelings she’s been fighting off for months threaten to overwhelm her: feelings of deep and utter care; of complete adoration; feelings of hot and harsh hatred; of absolute disdain; and abandonment, definitely abandonment; to confusion, anxiety, all bubbling as she tries to calm herself down; eyes closed, chanting the mantra:
you are in control, you are stronger now.   ___
Catra gets sick and someone unexpected turns up to help.
bloom (just for you) (High School AU)(Ongoing) (8/?)(68k+)(Ao3 only)
She was probably about to tell her to fuck off, though maybe—hopefully—she'd say it nicely. Catra closed her eyes and hoped when she opened them that this whole situation was just a figment of her imagination. Instead, she saw a one word reply. One single word. 
bet.
*
Adora Grayskull is the popular jock, the golden girl, the one that everyone loves. Catra D’riluth is the opposite. Yet despite this, they form an unlikely bond.
One shots:
Catradora —
What (Who) drives her to this? (Canon Divergent)(2k+)(Ao3 only)
Both Catra and Adora are tired. Both Catra and Adora reach a breaking point. Both Catra and Adora need to stop thinking. And when they do what will it drive them to do?
Catra’s Last Day (Canon Divergent)(2k+)(Ao3 only)
Catra has been anticipating this for months now, and now it's finally come - her last day at the Horde.
As the Sun Sets (Canon Compliant - Post S1)(1k+)(Ao3 only)
Watching the sunset was one way to end your day back at the Horde...
damn you, unrequited love (High school AU)(7k+)(Ao3 only)
Unrequited love sucks. That's what both Adora and Catra think.
Don’t sneak into the kitchen (Unless your girlfriend tells you to) (Canon Divergent)(2k+)(Ao3 only)
Catra has a bad habit of getting into mischief and Adora has a bad habit of agreeing to get into mischief with her.
Or
They sneak into a kitchen and make a mess.
As the Petal Falls (Beauty and the Beast AU)(1.5k+)(Ao3 only)
Shadow Weaver comes to kill the beast and take back Adora, who to her knowledge is a hostage there, when she has actually chosen to stay there - with Catra.
If I was perfect (Modern Family AU)(2.5k+)(Ao3 only)
Call it a coincidence, but just as Adora said the word “baby” (for the second time actually), Catra had choked on her own saliva.
How had children not crossed her mind before?
Two Sides Of The Same Coin (Gang AU)(1k+)(Ao3 only)
"Come on, Catra! You know better than to trust the horde!"
"And you know better than to trust the Rebellion!"
"The Horde is manipulating you!"
"At least they don't hide it and do it behind your back!"  
OR AU where the Rebellion is manipulating Adora and she doesn't realise (but Catra does)
I could get used to the sound of her voice (Royalty AU)(3.5k+)(Ao3 only)
Princess Adora was lucky enough for her parents not to marry her to a man. But, Princess Adora didn’t feel lucky in the slightest when she learned her wife to be was a right pain in the backside – or so she thought.
Or
Who knew that all it would take for Princess Adora to fall was her voice?
Fiction will make you think (what if it was real?) (YouTuber AU)(8k+)(Ao3 only)
All of a sudden, a new thought hits her like a train. Why does it matter so much? Image? Catra doesn’t exactly have a good one anyway, and if anything, it would be worse for Adora. But she is already in most of her videos, so clearly Adora doesn’t care either. So what would actually change?
Wait, Catra’s train of thought stops. Why am I thinking about dating Adora anyway?
OR
A YouTuber AU
Perspective (Prison AU)(25.5k+)(Ao3 only)
"Like you caved in Adora, you took the dive, and was it worth it?"
Adora looked at Catra, biting the inside of her cheek.
"I guess not."
Although, Adora couldn't deny that she felt almost lucky to have met someone like Catra, even if it was in here.
OR
Twelve months. Adora had earned herself twelve months in Prison — it was virtually hell on earth. Or it least it should have been, if not for a certain someone.
Sink my teeth to save you (Vampire AU)(1.5k+) — Ao3 link —
“How did...what are you?”
The stranger stroked her chin, pondering something, then said, “Well, I’m the tall dark stranger your parents warned you about," flashing her abnormally sharp fang like teeth, almost in a grin, though it felt more like she was just showing off.
I'll be your crutch to cope (College/Modern AU)(1.5k+) —Ao3 link —
A late night (or early morning) text from Catra’s roommate leads to more than she bargains for.
Do you know any spells to get rid of this thing? (Modern with Magic AU)(2.5k+)—Ao3 link—
“You know, like, spells and stuff, right?” Adora asks, hold a little looser on her wrist.
“Uh...yeah?” Catra replies, baffled.
Or
Catra’s a mage in training and Adora comes to her with a ridiculous request.
Christmas wouldn't be so bad (with you) (Modern Christmas AU)(1.9k+)—Ao3 link—
Catra wants to reject her responsibilities and problems for one night. Though, she can't avoid the one right in front of her for much longer.
As our differences divide us (Canon Divergent )(3.2k+)—Ao3 link—
Adora believes in the Horde. Catra doesn’t.
Or
An AU where Adora (with the sword) stays with the Horde and Catra leaves for the Rebellion.
Lost my heart (now you've taken it back) (Valentine's AU)(1k+)—Ao3 link—
Catra decides to make her first Valentine's with Adora a memorable experience.
Demons hiding underneath (Modern Gang AU)(3.3k+)—Ao3 link —
She kept plummeting deeper and deeper into the once beautiful blue abyss. And the further down she got, the more Adora realised it was closer to darkness than blue. It seemed she would continue falling, falling into the darkness until—
“Adora?”
They may be running away, escaping from their problems, but that doesn’t mean Adora can avoid her own too.
Distressing (over you) (Modern Superhero AU)(3.1k+)(Ao3 only)
Wearing her signature smug smirk, she stood, hands on her hips with a knowing look. Despite how many times she'd seen her in the familiar getup before, it somehow always managed to get her stomach lurching: those thigh highs which somehow weren't impractical; the crimson red suit which clung to her body in all the right places (arguably there were no wrong ones); the black sleeves which came up to cover her hands; and the red mask with pointed ears obscuring her face. However, the blue-gold glow of her eyes was still inexplicably Catra. It still captured her essence. At least to Adora.
things you said with clenched fists (Modern AU)(1.5k+)—Ao3 link—
Alone, at loss for words, but still – I've won and I've lost but I've fell and I've fucked it up
Or
An argument which stems from lies, deception and the past.
things you said when you were drunk (Modern AU)(1.6k+)(Ao3 only)
As Catra took her hand, with her mismatched eyes gleaming, and flashing her pearly white teeth in a grin, the smells, the noises of all the people around them dissolved into nothing more than white noise. 
The aftershock (of your touch) (Modern Soulmates AU)(28k+)(Ao3 only)
“When one finds their soulmate, they don’t immediately know that is the case. Some believe it is a way for the universe, for the great First Ones to test our ability to listen to its calling, to let us steer the wheel to our own fates. Others believe it is an act of cruelty—to try our patience, to punish us for being unable to love without any inhibitions. No matter what one believes, it doesn’t rid us of the fact that finding one's other half does not allow for instant gratification.”
Catra, jaded by her past, moves to Bright Moon to start a new life, and finds herself growing increasingly closer to her neighbour, Adora. Initially, she's apprehensive, but no matter what she does, something draws her to the girl, and a revelation causes it to make a lot of sense—and none at all.
all the time in the world (Post-Canon)(1k+)—Ao3 link—
In space, it feels like they have all the time in the world. All the time to relearn the new parts of each other, all the time to indulge the old parts of each other, all the time to simply just be.
You have their attention (and I want yours) (Modern AU - Actors)(1.9k+)—Ao3 link—
It’s all made worse when Catra does look in her direction, searching for none other than Adora’s eyes. She sees her sitting there, seething, and all she does is raise an eyebrow, then after a moment, grin. She can tell. And that only makes Adora more agitated as Catra turns back to the crowd and that girl is practically hanging off her arm. Now, Adora really is contemplating going up there, kissing the smirk of Catra’s face where everyone can see.
a regular customer of mine (Modern AU - Bakery)(3.9k)(Ao3 only)
Catra works at a bakery and Adora comes by every day trying to build up the courage to ask her out (unbeknownst to her).
Headcanons + Shorter Works: 
Catradora —
Fate Only Plays a Part (Canon divergent)(Ao3 only)
Adora finds a wounded and almost lifeless Catra in the woods and decides to bring her back to the castle.
I want to be with you when I grow up (Canon Divergent)(Ao3 only)
They are supposed to be fighting- they should be killing each other.
But they never can. And they never will.
Bad Dreams (Canon Divergent)
She tastes like coffee (Modern AU)
I like me better when I'm with you (Modern AU)
Adora's birthday (Canon Divergent)
The Start of Something Wonderful (Canon Divergent) 
Catradora Summer AU (Modern AU)(Snippet)
things you said when we forgave each other (Post-Canon)(Written before S5)
Reunion (S5 speculation)
354 notes · View notes
schrijverr · 4 years ago
Text
The Mystery of Castiel
Dean sets out to prove that his husband, Castiel, is an acual angel walking amongst man. He tries to convince his friends with his documentary. much to the confusion and amusement of fans.
Part of the Famous Husband verse, which is also a series)
On AO3.
Ships: Destiel
Warnings: None, but I’ll be happy to tag something for you, no questions asked! :)
~~~~~~~~~~
The video opened with a grainy and moving shot of a dark hallway with lights spilling out of a doorway at the end. From behind the camera Dean whispered: “I think there’s something in my house. It feels ancient, powerful. So, I’m checking it out.”
He was close to the doorway and he took a deep breath before rounding the last corner, finally showing the kitchen.
Standing at the kitchen counter was Cas, he was in his pajamas and looked like a dear in headlights when he heard Dean enter. In his hands he held a cereal box from which he was eating dry cereal. The digital clock beside him displayed the time, 03:07. His voice was gruff from sleep as he hurriedly said: “It’s not what it looks like.”
Dean screamed, then his intro rolled. It was a drawn impala that came down the road, it stopped in the middle of the screen and the drawn Dean gave a wink to the viewers, then he sped off again and the smoke was bridge back to the video.
The backdrop was out of focus, but you could make out a bunch of red string and vague pictures. Dean was sitting in front of it, his hair was disheveled and he had dark bruises under his eyes. Of course, the viewers didn’t have to know that was thanks to Jessica's make up skills. He rubbed his forehead and said: “I can’t do this anymore.”
He sighed deeply and went on: “I love my husband, I do. He is my everything, but the elephant in the room hasn’t been discussed seriously and it’s eating me up. I don’t know how to start talking about it without him turning it into a joke. Which is why I am making this video, I want your opinions and tips on how to handle this or just for you tell me if I’m acting crazy. Because I really need someone to tell me what to do.”
He was now looking straight into the camera as he said: “I think Cas is either an angel or some sort of cryptid. He’s just not human that’s all I know, okay. He has to be immortal, not of this world. I mentioned this before, but no one takes me seriously.”
The video changed and a time line came into view, while Dean did a voice over: “I met Cas in September of 2010. According to him he is born in 1990, so he should be 30, if all of this is correct and he has aged just like a human would.”
A dot appeared on the line and 2013 came above it. Dean said: “I started my YouTube channel in 2013, Cas claims to have been 23 at this time and I have footage of him in one of my videos.”
A clip played of Dean telling the camera he was going to try and drink three liters of soda in one go with no break in between. In the background a man walked past.
“I now see that that might not have been the best clip, so here is a picture as well.” Deans voice was heard as a photo of a young Dean and Cas appeared. They were sitting next to each other on the beach. Dean had a beer in his hand and cheered to the camera while Cas did a peace sign in the background, bee sunglasses firmly on his face.
“To compare this to now, here is a picture Sam took of us last week.” Dean said and another photo appeared beside it. This one was taken on the couch the viewers knew so well from live streams. Dean and Cas were sitting next to each other in this picture as well, they had a blanket thrown over their legs and a bowl of popcorn on their laps. Dean was kissing Cas’s cheek while he flipped of Sam, aka the camera.
“He appears to have aged normally, although he is still dashingly handsome, if I might say so. Not the point. Anyway, since he has aged so normally most people don’t believe me, but I’m going to prove it.”, the photo’s faded and the Dean from earlier reappeared.
“I’ve been awake for days now, trying to find all the evidence I could, just to try and convince someone out there, to hear a voice back saying that I am not going crazy.” Dean said, “I am married to an immortal non-human, an angel in the biblical sense, and I need to tell someone.”
He picked up a manila folder, and opened it. He started: “Okay, so the first thing I have is his family. He grew up extremely Christian, or so he says, but I think he’s hiding behind a facade of biblical households to hide the fact that he is an angel himself and therefor witnessed everything that happened within the Bible.”
Dean chuckled: “He’s not even subtle about it. I mean, seriously. His name is also the name of an angel, Castiel the angel of Thursday. And he has eleven siblings, which makes a total of  twelve children, like twelve as in the amount of apostles Jesus had and they also all have biblical names. His brothers are Gabriel, Micheal, Raphael etcetera. He even has a brother named Lucifer that apparently no one talks to anymore, because he defied their father and is now in prison or something. That’s not a good cover story. That’s the Bible retold, but then bad.”
Cas and Dean had discussed what Dean would say about Castiels family beforehand and they had decided that this was enough. No reason to get into more detail about it. This was supposed to be funny and dumb, not revealing and sad.
“What shoots a hole in this, according to Sam is that we have pictures of him from when he was a child.” Dean said and a picture of a toddler Cas with big blue eyes and a small frown already on his face was shown, before Dean went on: “I think that Sam is wrong. If you’re a powerful entity, you can make fake pictures of a baby-you that has never existed. But I will let you draw your own conclusions about that.”
“Coming back to an earlier point,” Dean went on, “his History knowledge. This is also weird, since he knows everything about History, in particular thing about long long ago. Which as he points out is because he studied History. And that’s fair, but it’s weird.”
He rubbed his face again and groaned in frustration: “Ugh, just let me, let me put this into words better.”
“If you studied History, you know History and that’s just how it is. But what you don’t know is suddenly everything about the ancient times, no matter how much you specialized on it, which I know he hasn’t since he teaches History and you need to know more than just one period in order to do that.” Dean said, “We all on the same page?”
There was a silence, like he was waiting for a response. He acted like he got it: “Good, so why- how can he know everything in excruciating detail about that period? And he knows it like he’s been there and he has an abnormal amount of space in his brain for memories.”
A clip played of Cas, Dean behind the camera. They were on vacation, probably, and standing in a church. Dean said: “Can you repeat what you just said, sunshine?”
Cas looked over, saw the camera and shot it a tired look. He rolled his eyes and pointed at a picture of Jesus: “I said that this Jesus isn’t very realistic, because he isn’t smiling. Well, he has a smile, but it’s like this weird serene one. He was young when he was crucified. You really think a twenty-year-old had any patience or chill? I think not. He had a big happy smile,” then hastily, “probably. I think, at least.”
Disheveled Dean reappeared and said: “Tell me that is not fricking suspicious. And that’s just the one I captured on camera. He’s always commenting stuff like that.” his eyes lit up and he snapped his finger as he said: “Like, like he did in the Q&A video we did!”
The clip played of Castiel talking about the Tower of Babel.
“I mean come on. He talked about it like he knew how it had suddenly turned, because he had been there. I know what you’re thinking, it’s a story that gets told to Catholic children. And you’d be right, it is a biblical story. Yet, Mr. History talked about it like it is something that happened, even though it hasn’t been proven.” Dean explained, “And then he tried to cover it up, by saying how it would be an opportunity to find out. Good cover story, angel, but not happening.”
“And don’t get me started on his lack of pop-culture knowledge.” Dean went on, “I mean, I got him a phone. His first phone ever, for his 21st birthday. No one should get their first phone in 2011.”
A picture of Cas came on screen. He was holding up a phone, but it was all wrong. He held in with his pointer finger and thumb, a thumb that was in the middle of the screen, and he looked at it with confusion written all over his face.
“He also knew nothing about movies.” Dean appeared again, “I had to show him everything. And I mean everything. No Disney, no Star Wars, no Lord of the Rings, no Friends, no Indiana Jones, no horror movies, nothing. Almost like he had been away from earth while all of it was made and only popped down recently, which reconnects to my previous point about the specific History knowledge.”
“Another thing is his social skills.” Dean moved on to his last point, “He had no clue how to interact with people when I first met him and when I asked about it he claimed his ‘people skills were rusty’, like he used to have them, but they had faded over time. Which would be impossible, because at that age you either don’t have them or you do, you cannot have forgotten entirely.”
The screen went black again and a list appeared: “So we now have four strange things about him.”
1. Youth and Family
“His youth is filled with weird biblical details that are so accurate or strange that it couldn’t have been a coincidence.”
2. History Knowledge
“Despite his study, this is still weird and suspicious, but I feel like the evidence I showed speaks for itself.”
3. Lack of Pop-culture Knowledge
“This could also be his sheltered upbringing, but he was already out in the real world for two years when I met him, so why he had never encountered any of it is a mystery. With, in my eyes, an easy explanation.”
4. Lack of Social Skills
“Again this could be his upbringing, sure, but even then. If he isn’t lying about his family that is eleven children and parents along with an entire church to communicate with. You still pick up stuff like personal space.”
Dean appeared again and said: “I’ve laid out this evidence to some of my friends, this were their reactions.”
It cut to Sam sitting on a chair, looking like he’d rather be anywhere else. Sam asked: “Do we really have to do this, Dean?”
“Yes,” Deans voice came from behind the camera, “just hear me out, okay. I get that you didn’t want to listen before, but I have evidence now.”
Sam sighed.
It cut again to Sam shaking his head and saying: “I don’t know, why you’re so invested in this. All of this has a rational explanation, you can see that too.”
“But the family thing is weird, right. It’s so suspiciously correct that has to be fake that just can’t be coincidence.” Dean protested.
“Actually,” Sam replied, “humans have a weird sense of perception about coincidence. So much happens at one moment in the world that something strange or usual is bound to happen, we classify that as coincidence, but it’s just statistics, Math. It’s very interest-”
“Yeah, whatever, nerd.” Dean interrupted, “So, you don’t believe me.”
“No, Dean. I don’t.” Sam told him, “Can I go now?”
“Yeah.” Dean sighed, before it cut to Charlie sitting in the same chair.
Dean asked her: “So do you know why you’re here?”
Charlie nodded: “Yes and I am willing to hear you out.”
“You are?” Dean said, excitement seeping into his voice.
Charlie nodded, then it cut to her reading the final notes in the folder. She bit her lip and said: “I don’t know, Dean. Some off this is pretty suspicious, but I wouldn’t call it evidence of Cas being an angel or other immortal. I mean, the church can be weird.”
“But the History thing is definitely suspicious, right? I’m not being crazy about that?” Dean asked
Charlie answered: “Well, it wouldn’t surprise me, if he had developed a special interest in ancient Christian history while growing up and if he used to be a heavy believer then I suspect he must have thought a lot about how Jesus must have been and stuff.”
Dean huffed, but didn’t respond.
There was a shaky video of Ellen saying: “Dean, I have a bar to run, I don’t have time for your bullshit.”
But then Jo was in the chair and she said: “Dean, I love you and all, but I’m not doing this.”
“Please, just hear me out.” Deans voice was tired and it cracked, Jo relented.
In the end she said: “This is all strange, sure. I might have believed a bit of it, if I hadn’t known Cas. I mean, come on. He’s a dork and a teacher. He loves you, Dean. Don’t ruin that over something stupid.”
A sigh was heard.
After that it was Bobby, who was sitting on the chair. He didn’t look all that pleased. Most knew Bobby from Deans series about Baby where he would sometimes help or appear in the background and stories about Deans childhood.
Dean said: “Bobby, you know me, right?”
“I’d hope so, boy. I practically raised you.” Bobby replied.
“Exactly,” Dean said, “so you know, I’m not one to make random claims about this.”
“I do.” Bobby sighed, clearly not liking where this was going.
“Great.” Dean exclaimed happily, “Because I have collected a bunch of evidence and I want your opinion on it.”
It cut to Bobby rubbing his forehead while he read the last bits of evidence. He looked up and said: “I think you’re grasping at straws, right now. There are more logical solutions than this, but you’re ignoring ‘em, because you want to see this.”
Significantly sadder than before Dean responded: “So you don’t believe me either?”
“No, of course not, you idjit.” Bobby replied, “I walked Cas down the isle, I think I know the damn guy. He’s not some immortal. And don’t go bothering Jody about this either, you hear me.”
Then it cut back to the disheveled Dean, who said: “As you can see they still weren’t ready to listen to me. So I turned to my last resort, Gabriel. Castiels older brother.”
Gabriel was lounging in the chair, smirk playing on his lips and lollipop in hand. He smiled: “Dean-o, it this what it’s come to? Crawling to me?”
Dean sighed from behind the camera and said: “It was either you or Michael, you’re the least worst option.”
“Ahw, you flatter me.” Gabriel said with a wink, then he asked: “So, what is this all about?”
Dean answered: “I’m trying to prove that Cas is an angel, or an other sort immortal, but main theory is angel. I figured you were the best bet to get to the truth.”
The moment the word ‘angel’ left Deans lips, Gabriels face fell although he quickly tried to cover it up. He tried to laugh it off: “You’re being ridiculous. Little Cassie is a nerd, sure, but immortal. Sorry, but that’s hysterical. Besides, how else would you explain me, or the other people at the wedding?”
“I don’t know, other angels? Actors? Lot of possibilities. Maybe it was mind control.” Dean replied.
Gabriel laughed and shook his head, but when he looked up his face was completely serious as he said: “Stop searching, Dean. You won’t find anything, just love your husband in peace and live a long and happy life, okay.”
Dean swallowed thickly and shakily said: “Okay.”
Then it cut back to Dean from before, who said: “As you can see, he wasn’t very helpful. Although he did kind of scare me, the guy nearly threatened me, but he also made Cas more suspicious. He’s hiding something, I can feel it.”
“Anyway, none of my outside resources were helpful, so it’s time to look at our subject himself, Cas.” Dean said and the screen warped to a vlog.
It was filmed in such a way that it was obvious that Dean was trying to be stealthy. It showed Castiel doing the dishes, after a second Dean asked: “Why don’t you use the dishwasher, sunshine?”
Cas looked around and shrugged: “I don’t trust it, Dean. Machinery doesn’t seem to like me and I have not come to an agreement with the dishwasher yet, maybe later.”
Dean laughed: “The dishwasher is not a businessman, Cas. Here I’ll load it in.”
Then it changed to the living room, specifically the couch. It was a solid couch, easily a 1000 pounds. Dean yelled: “Caaaaas!”
From the distance came: “What is it, Dean?”, along with footsteps.
“I dropped my phone and accidentally kicked it under the couch. Can you help me?” Dean answered.
Cas looked at the couch and nodded. First he tried to fit his hand under and swipe the phone out from underneath it, but when that didn’t work, he grabbed the underside of the couch and lifted it as he told Dean to grab his phone, which he did.
Dean smirked at him and said: “Wow, Cas, very sexy. Have you been going to the gym lately?”
He only got an eyeroll in return along with a quick kiss, before Cas disappeared.
What the viewers didn’t get to see was the small carjack that had been carefully edited out, along with Sam, who had operated it.
Then it was Dean running up to Cas, yelling: “Smile, angel!”
Castiel turned to him like a deer in headlights and blinked heavily when the flash nearly blinded him. What was peculiar about this moment was the fact that his eyes seemed to glow an intense light blue, almost as if he was illuminated from the inside, which had been an easy edit, but it looked very cool, if Dean was being honest.
After that Dean said: “I showed these clips, along with a few others that are, admittedly, less convincing to my friends.” followed by a quick compilation of Sam, Charlie, Jo and Bobby shaking their heads and telling him he was an idiot or other variations thereof, “As you can see, they were still unconvinced.” Dean finished.
“They were unconvinced, what I have set out to do isn’t achieved. They aren’t listening and they aren’t seeing the truth. I know what I see, I know what Cas is. And they are just blind for the truth.” Dean told the audience, “So, I’m trusting you to open your eyes and see what is out there. Please, look at this and see the truth.”
Then it went to the endcard. Dean waved and said: “That was it for today. I hope you can support me and tell me that I’m not crazy. If you do, comment about it, like this video, share it to get the word out. Maybe subscribe and ring that bell, so you won’t miss out on any updates about it. Bye Hunters, see you on the-”
He was cut of by the slam of a door. He startled and looked over, but before he could get over the shock the lights overhead exploded and the room went dark. You could hear the heavy and angry voice of Castiel, who bellowed: “Dean Winchester, you have not listened to the warning Gabriel gave you. Your time has come.”
Then the video ended.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Oh my god is he okay?!!!?!?!?!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Pff anyone who believes this
shit is an idiot
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I know this is probably fake,
but I’m scared now
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Don’t lie, who’s been a fan of
Dean since day one?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Okay, but are we gonna talk
about Gabriel???
No?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You’re not crazy Dean. I once
saw a ghost. The supernatural
is out there and Castiel can be
who you say he is. We don’t
know what the paranormal has
in store for us. Keep believing,
keep fighting!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dudes, if he had time to edit and
upload it then he’s prbbly fine
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Should we call the police??
Is he ok???
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Dean be looking like a raccoon
and still be hella fine
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Cass talking about Jesus is such
a mood, my Christian ass can
relate
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
IS HE DEAD?? DID DEAN JUST DIE!!! HELLO??? ANSWERS PLEASE!!!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Really? After all the sweet and
loving Cas content we got, we’re
supposed to believe this??
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Get yo self a man whos willing
to make a fake docu bout you
pretending to believe youre an
actual angel
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
~
Dean was grinning as he scrolled through the comments on his latest videos. He was quite proud of it honestly and was very happy with how it had turned out and the reaction of the fans. Cas saw him smiling and asked: “So I take it, it went well.”
Looking up Dean said: “Yeah, you might have to answer some questions tomorrow, if you want those kids to trust you after ‘murdering me’.”
Cas groaned, but couldn’t suppress the smile and fond eyeroll.
Then the phone rang, Dean looked at the screen with surprise, but smiled when he saw who was calling. It was Sam, the picture of him sleeping with a plastic spoon in his mouth lighting up the screen. He picked up: “Heya, Sammy.”
Sam answered: “Dean, come save me.”
“What is it?” Dean asked, serious brother mode instantly activated.
But it was lost with Sams answer: “I know you’re trying to sell the whole ‘I got murdered by my own husband who is an angel’-stick, but you’re fans are worried and mobbing me on Twitter demanding answers.”
Dean laughed and relayed what Sam had said to Cas, who also chuckled. Then Dean turned back and said: “I’ll do something about it.”
“Somehow that’s not very comforting.” Sam said.
“Don’t worry about it, Sammy.”
“That isn’t helping.”
“I said don’t worry about it.”
“Dean? … Dean! … Dean!”
Dean hung up and turned to Cas as he asked: “Would you mind filming me?”
An hour later a video was posted on Deans Twitter and Instagram. It was off Cas walking into the living room, where an unharmed Dean was sat on the couch. Cas said: “Hello, Dean.”
Dean looked his way and smiled: “Hey, angel. What’s up? Why are you filming?”
Cas replied: “Some off your fans were worried about you after your last video, so I’m showing them you’re okay.”
Dean frowned and asked: “Why would they worry about me? It was just a dumb video doing Just Dance, not flattering, but hardly worrisome.”
“Don’t you remember your funny little video about me and some conspiracy?” Castiel asked, way too innocently.
Dean frown deepened and he looked confused and he said: “What are you even talking about?”
“Nothing, it was all just silly. Don’t worry about okay?” Cas answered, still holding onto that innocent voice.
Dean smiled at him and said: “Whatever you say, sunshine.”
Then it was over, needless to say that fans weren’t reassured, neither were the kids at school the next day, when Cas pretended he had no idea what they were talking about and shut them down the moment they tried to show him the video on their phones.
@Deanmustbeprotected posted about it on their Insta and multiple conspiracies were posted on every platform.
Dean and Cas along with everyone they’d gotten involved watched from the sidelines with amusement. Mission accomplished!
20 notes · View notes
skyefullofdaisies · 5 years ago
Text
I just got told on Twitter the reason I don’t think Supergirl queerbaits SC shippers because I “see it through a heteronormative lense”.
Honey. My God. Much to the complete disgust and disappointment of several extended family members I am not straight in the least little bit. Of course the last time I made this point an SCer told me I was lying because they could “smell the straightness on me” though that is another conversation altogether.
Don’t you all love being told what you are, what you believe and how you view things because the SCers don’t like anyone who doesn’t agree with them, calls them out on their shit and acknowledges that Lena/Kara aren’t secretly in love? This all started because I tweeted that no wonder toxic SCers are so adamant on their ship when they’ve got people like that Abnormally Adam dude, who has a pretty big platform, backing them up by saying bullshit like “Cat needs to come back and tell Kara she’s in love with Lena”. Also doing entire video’s devoted to the “queer baiting” in SuperGirl that doesn’t actually exist except for in their heads because the writers won’t bow down and give them what they want.
Can you imagine the outrage if a straight person decided that a truly LGBT+ couple wasn’t what they wanted so they decided to ship them with straight characters? So why is it okay to force LGBT+ on Kara and Lena because a certain number decided they have romantic tension/chemistry? Because THAT isn’t hypocritical at all. Don’t @ me with that representation crap either. We have representation with such a great character who is unfairly ignored in favor of forcing Kara/Lena to be lesbians or bisexual when there’s zero narrative justification for it other than SCers seeing what they want and then harassing writers and anyone who doesn’t agree with them while claiming they aren’t the problem everyone else is. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Which is also why every single male love interest for Kara/Lena is deemed immediately “abusive” but Lena can gaslight Kara, use Krptonite against her, trap her in her own fortress and treat her like shit for nearly an entire season because that is, apparently, not abusive at all. It’s just signs of true love and that Lena loves Kara so much she is simply overreacting!! Who knew?? 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Sorry for the 12 paragraph essay here but I’m just so very tired and annoyed of being told what I am and what I believe because these horrible fucking shippers want to stand on their soap boxes. The only good thing about this is we get to watch these toxic SCers spin in an outraged circle every season knowing SC will never, everrrr be canon or endgame. Just like Destiel isn’t and just like SwanQueen wasn’t. They can ship it all they want but Emma Swan didn’t end up with that toxic mess that is Regina and our Superbae won’t end up with that toxic mess that Lena is becoming more and more as this season wears on. So they can rant and rave and tweet hateful shit all they want. SQer’s did at Eddy for 7 seasons and Emma still got her HEA with Hook and Baby Hope so 🤷‍♀️. I guess I would be angry too if I constantly lost when everything is said and done. Also knowing Alex Danvers wins like the Queen she is. Anyway, I’m going back to bed. Have a good rest of your evening ya’ll.
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