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gernades · 4 years ago

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Ace is gone. He’s been gone for five weeks.

Nancy has had a lot of time to think.

She sees the places where he used to be- the kitchen, his house, the spot in his driveway where Florence is always parked- and can’t stop looking at them.

“Nancy?”

Nancy blinks and looks up. Ace’s mother is watching her, hands resting on the dough, eyes concerned. “Are you okay?”

Today they’re making babka-chocolate bread, braided in sections and glazed with egg wash. Nancy looks down. She’s not very good at braiding, but it mostly looks like Rebecca’s dough.

“I’m fine,” she says, a half-smile working its way across her face. “It’s just been a long week.” Another week without Ace. She doesn’t know why she’s here, in his house- in his kitchen- but Rebecca doesn’t seem to mind. She never has.

Nancy’s here every other day, now. They’ve made bread and biscuits and a dozen Jewish desserts that Nancy is now addicted to.

Sometimes, Thom joins them.

( “He’s taken quite the shine to you,” Rebecca whispers on one such day, eyes sparkling. “He’s not like this with everyone.”

Nancy doesn’t bring up the ASL textbooks sitting new and shiny on her desk at home.

Talking about me again, Thom signs over his shoulder, and Rebecca laughs, flicks him on the shoulder. )

Now, Rebecca gently sets down her dough and wipes her fingers off on her apron. “Do you want to talk about it?”

No, thank you, is Nancy’s knee jerk reaction. She pauses before letting the words come out. She’s been doing that more often, as of late. Sana-her therapist- would be proud.

Nancy purses her lips and drags a finger through the loose flour on the counter. “It’s nothing, really. I’m just… going through a lot with my dad’s business, and... I can’t help but feel like I’m never going to be happy again.”

The last part she doesn’t mean to say out loud. “I’m sorry,” Nancy says immediately, and lifts her head up. “That was…”

“Oh, honey,” Rebecca whispers. Her eyes are shiny. “I don’t know exactly what’s been going on, but I can tell that it’s been hard on you. You’ve always been so strong. Just like your mother.”

“Hm,” Nancy manages, throat tight and vision blurry. When Rebecca bustles around the table and wraps her arms around her, she doesn’t pull away.

Rebecca smells like soap and rosemary: she is warm and accepting and she makes Nancy’s heart hurt less. This will have to end eventually, but she can’t help but lean into it anyway.

***

“You’ve been spending a lot of time out of the house,” Carson remarks later that night.

They’re sitting at the dinner table, doing their best to eat what is supposed to be spaghetti, courtesy of Ryan. He’s still learning how to use basic appliances: his cooking is dangerous.

Nancy wrinkles her nose and stabs at a coagulated lump of pasta.

“Yeah. Nothing bad. I’ve just been… baking.”

Ryan hums and shoves a forkful of food into his mouth. Nancy and Carson watch in amazement as he gets it down without gagging. “You’re really good at it, too. That, uh, chocolate croissant thingy you brought home yesterday was amazing.”

Nancy raises an eyebrow, amused. “The rugelach?”

Ryan jabs his fork into the air. “Yes. So good.”

“Spending time with Rebecca, I gather?” Carson’s voice is light and free of judgement. Before the whole Wraith thing, Nancy would have pulled up her walls, deflected the conversation.

It’s a little different now, though, so Nancy just nods. “It’s just... nice to have someone to talk to who’s normal.”

Carson sighs and rubs her shoulder. “I understand that completely.”

“Hey,” Ryan states, expression pinched, “is pasta supposed to make my stomach bubbly?”

Nancy and Carson exchange a long, tired look.

They take Ryan to the ER for food poisoning.

***

George slams a palm down onto the table. Her engagement ring sparkles in the afternoon light. Nancy jumps. “It’s been quiet, Drew. Too quiet. I don’t trust it.”

Nancy takes a long look around the Claw. It’s nearly packed to the brim with customers- their Yelp ratings have skyrocketed since the staff have actually started working again. “This is your idea of quiet?”

George groans and slides into the opposite booth. “You know what I mean. We’ve had nothing supernatural happen for almost a month. It’s driving me crazy.”

“Good,” Nancy replies mildly, and takes another bite of her crab roll. “I’m taking a sabbatical from sleuthing.”

Sana was the one to suggest a break from anything stressful- like sports or large events! Avoiding murder and possession via the paranormal probably isn’t what her therapist means, but Nancy can read between the lines.

George screeches. Half the restaurant turns to look at them. They turn back when they see who it is.

“What?” She narrows her eyes and leans in. “Okay. I never thought I’d live to see the Hero of Horseshoe Bay gives herself a break.” She crosses her arms. “I’m proud of you, Nancy.”

Nancy’s heart hums. She sends George a grateful smile. “Thanks.”

George smiles back. “Your lunch break was over ten minutes ago, by the way. I need you to clean out the grease traps.”

Nancy’s smile drops.

The grease traps are gross, hard work. They’re also the last normal thing Nancy did with Ace, which is equal parts sad and amusing.

She grits her teeth and scrubs her cloth against the dirty metal. At least it’s cool here, in the kitchen, and away from the always-prying eyes of customers.

The bell above the restaurant door tinkles faintly. Nancy sighs and dips her rag into the bucket of degreaser.

Bess screams, high-pitched and excited. “Ace!”

Nancy stands up so quickly that she knocks the bucket onto its side. No way.

He can’t be back- it’s too soon, too late. Nancy needs to think more. If he’s back, she can’t go to his house again, can she?

Heart pounding, she creeps over to the window and peers into the restaurant. He’s surrounded by Bess and George- and, after a moment, Nick jogs in from the parking lot, smile blinding.

Nancy wants to go see him. She does. Her feet seem to have other ideas, though. She can’t seem to move at all.

Ace looks good. His hair is longer, and sun-bleached; his skin is tanned. Even from this distance Nancy can see the new freckles on his face.

There’s a leather jacket, black and tight around his shoulders- and two new silver studs in his ears. He’s smiling. He looks happy.

Nancy’s chest aches.

“Hey,” she hears him say to George, “Where’s Nancy?”

Nancy takes a half step backwards.

“Cleaning the grease traps in the kitchen,” George replies, spreading her arms in a grand gesture. “The best job in the world.”

Ace laughs.

Nancy runs.

She doesn’t really run- she simply makes a strategic, tactical retreat into the staff room and out the back door.

There’s no time to overthink it- not yet, her brain and heart agree. Not yet.

Nancy thanks her former self for parking her car at the very edge of the lot. Nobody notices as she pulls out onto the road, a full two hours before her shift is supposed to end.

Ooh, she’s a little runaway! Bon Jovi croons on the radio. Daddy’s girl learned fast-

Nancy grits her teeth and pushes her foot against the accelerator.

All those things he couldn’t say! Ooh, she’s a little runawa-

Nancy spins the radio dial with fumbling fingers, and spends the rest of her drive listening to germanic opera.

“Shit.”

***

“Jesus,” Ryan says when he opens the front door. “You look worse than I do, and I spent three hours getting my stomach pumped last night.”

Nancy pushes past him without a word.

Ryan’s voice lowers, softens. “Nancy. Hey.” He reaches out, gently wraps a hand around her wrist. She stops walking. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Nancy says, but her words come out wobbly, uneven.

Ryan scoots a little closer. “Okay, well… that’s a lie.”

Nancy snorts. “Ace is back.”

Ryan smiles, relieved. “That’s great!” He pauses. “Isn’t it?” When she says nothing, he squints his eyes, searches her face. “Oh,” he says finally. “I see.”

Nancy stiffens, alarmed. “How did you-,”

Ryan sighs and taps his cheek. “We make the same kind of face, you know. Genetics and all that.”

“Shit,” Nancy says again, and tries very hard not to sink through the floor.

“Don’t worry,” Ryan promises. “I wont say anything.”

“What’s going on?”

Ryan and Nancy turn to face Carson, who is wrapped in a purple robe, fresh out of the shower. He takes one look at the expression on Nancy’s face and rushes over. “Is there another entity-,”

“No,” Nancy says vehemently. She drops her head onto his shoulder, breathes in the smell of his aftershave. “I’m just not feeling well.”

Neither of her dads press her for more- they simply stand like that, the three of them, for a very long time.

***

George: where the hell are u??

George: hello? nancy?

George: are u ok

Bess: ACE IS BACK!!!! :D

Bess: wait where r u

Nick: Did something happen?

Ace: hey. i just got back. where are you?

“No,” Nancy says softly, and turns off her phone. “I am not good.”

She needs a plan. Something to protect herself, and to spare everyone from the complications that one-sided feelings often bring. It’s been a good five weeks, if she doesn’t include the whole Ace thing. It’s been peaceful. Happy.

She doesn’t want to ruin that.

Nancy draws her knees up to her chest and stares out the window. I think I’ll just have to pretend. It’s either that, or avoiding Ace altogether- which would be impossible.

No more baking with Rebecca and Thom, either. That hurts more than Nancy wants to admit- but she’s already made up her mind. She’ll keep her feelings on the back burner, and do her best to keep things normal.

With a sigh, she stands, and goes upstairs to take a much-needed nap.

She dreams again. It’s the same one she’s been having every night for the past five weeks.

Nancy dreams of silk and cigarette smoke- because Ace always has to light one up after he has a joint- and of the ocean. The waves lap at the shore, rhythmic and quiet. It’s peaceful, here. Safe.

She dreams about a cliff, soft grass: warm, roving hands and a familiar mouth against her own. If she calls out his name in her sleep, that’s her problem.

If she wakes up sweaty and teary-eyed, that’s her problem, too.

#VERY quick thing before work #just thinkin. yanno.#nace #ficlet #t

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woodstockbtswriter · 4 years ago

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Voyagers

Genre: Fluff/Headcanon

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader (Female)

Summary: A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to join BTS on a Bon Voyage adventure leads to once-in-a-lifetime love.

Warning(s): Some mentions of physical intimacy, but nothing detailed or graphic.

Author’s Note: So... this is it. This is the end. And as promised, it is looooong. You might want to find some snacks and a comfy spot before we get started. I probably could have broken this up into 3 or 4 more parts but, here it is. Please note, my SMAU Sentimental and my drabble Love both fit into this part, and I’ve added links where they should be read.

I can’t believe how far we’ve come! This story is my baby, and I’m so immensely grateful for all the love and support it has received! As relieved as I am to finish it, it is hard to let go, so it’s entirely possible that I may write some bonus chapters in the future. Although, I tried to fit so much into this epilogue, I’m not sure what’s left to say! So anyway, for the last time, please, PLEASE enjoy! 💕

GIF Credit: MONOSUGA

Masterlist

Epilogue

Leaving New Zealand

Yoongi promised he’d take care of everything, and he meant it

You learned that maybe an hour after he snuck out of your room, when one of the producers stopped you as you were lugging your suitcase down the hall

You recognized him as the same producer who’d requested you spend less time with Yoongi, and you worried you were in trouble

But to your astonishment, he apologized for suggesting anything, saying it was never his intention to make things difficult for you and he meant no disrespect

He then informed you that he personally made all the arrangements for you to fly to Korea with the boys instead of returning home

And as he bowed and wished you all the best, you realized Yoongi must have spoken with him

You were touched that he kept his word, and made sure to thank him as soon as you found him out in the main area of the house

All the members and the crew were bustling about the living room and kitchen, hurrying to pack up and clear out

But you dared to give Yoongi a quick, grateful hug, and a blush spread across his cheeks

Hoseok noticed and froze in his tracks, shooting you a look

So you guessed it was as good a time as any to let the other boys know you’d be joining them on their flight home

(Though you’d have to wait until you were all alone to tell them exactly why)

They were all happy and excited, but none more than Hoseok

He scooped you up in his arms and twirled you around, squealing

And when he set you back down, he whispered in your ear that he wanted to hear all the details later

With a laugh, you promised to tell him everything as soon as you got the chance

Not much later, everyone was all loaded up, and you made your way to the airport

Leaving New Zealand was bittersweet

Your week there with the boys had been one of the best of your life

But you were excited to have another whole week with Yoongi

And you were particularly looking forward to more privacy

Though you knew it wouldn’t be much more

The Bangtan boys were constantly in the public eye

And that meant that - even though filming for Bon Voyage was over - you and Yoongi still had to maintain some distance when you weren’t alone

That much was apparent the moment you arrived at the airport in Christchurch

Yoongi had held your hand the whole drive, but released it before exiting the vehicle and didn’t take it again

But you still sat next to each other on the plane, and enjoyed talking and watching movies together during the long flight

And everything about it just felt so comfortable and normal and… right

That is, until you ultimately arrived at the Incheon airport, and the reality of dating an idol became even clearer

Dozens of paparazzi and fans were gathered, obviously aware that BTS was due to return that day

The crowd fluttered to life as soon as your group came around the corner, cameras flashing and girls calling out

And when they caught sight of you with the members, they became even more frantic

But Yoongi subtly kept you close behind him, shielding you from the mob as best he could

And the other boys formed a circle around you until you made it out of the airport and into a waiting car

Then when you were safely behind tinted windows, Yoongi finally took your hand again

And he expressed his regret that you had to endure that scene, seeming worried that you’d have second thoughts

But you reassured him that you could handle the craziness, and promised him that he was worth it to you

He was visibly relieved when you said that

With a smile and a squeeze of your hand, he assured you he would look out for you

And promised that you were worth it to him, too

First Night in Seoul

When you arrived at their luxury apartment in the heart of Seoul, Yoongi and the boys gave you the grand tour first thing

It was a little surreal to actually be there when you’d only ever seen it in videos

But you noticed how much more relaxed the boys seemed the moment they walked in the door, and could tell how happy they were to be home

And you felt instantly at home, too

Which was a good thing, because Yoongi informed you that you would be staying at their apartment with them all week

You would have been more than happy with a hotel room, you told him, your mouth hanging open

You would have even taken a bunk in a hostel, as long as you were close to him

But Yoongi insisted, saying you could stay in his room, and he’d sleep on the couch

Or you could share his bed, he mumbled so only you could hear, if that was what you were most comfortable with

With a suppressed smile, you told him you’d think about it, and you resumed your tour of the apartment feeling unreasonably flushed

After you’d seen the whole apartment, the boys ordered dinner (Jimin’s treat, of course)

And as everyone tucked in, Namjoon raised his glass

He proposed a celebratory toast, to a successful Bon Voyage, to returning home, to you - their new friend

And to Yoongi-hyung falling in love

The other members cheered enthusiastically in agreement, tapping their glasses together

Which caused you to grin, and Yoongi to groan

Namjoon, Hoseok, Taehyung, and Jungkook wasted no time recounting their version of events, filling Jin and Jimin in on anything they might have missed

And you happily supplied any further details they lacked, like the fact that you and Yoongi were now officially together

All the boys teased Yoongi mercilessly for being so soft

And Yoongi was a grumbling, blushing mess all the while

But you could feel the love behind their mocking

And they made sure you knew - despite their joking - how truly happy they all were for both of you

By the time dinner was over, everyone was exhausted and ready to call it a night

You hadn’t given a lot of thought to the sleeping arrangements since Yoongi first mentioned them

But as he made up his bed for you with clean sheets and extra pillows, you knew you didn’t want to sleep in his room without him

And when you asked him to stay, Yoongi needed no convincing

He quickly slipped beneath the covers with you, hugging you tightly against his body and pressing kisses to the back of your neck and into your hair

And that was how you spent the whole night, curled up together, sleeping blissfully

And though you’d be lying if you said the idea of doing something other than sleeping never crossed your mind…

Just being able to spend the night together without any fear of being caught in the morning was enough

For the time being, anway

Boyfriend/Girlfriend

Your extra week with Yoongi in Korea, like your week in New Zealand, was one you’d never forget

The boys had full schedules, consisting of everything from rehearsals to filming to recording to appearances, but Yoongi continued to keep his promise

He arranged for you to accompany them to everything, so you were able to spend a lot of time all together

And you naturally continued to grow closer and closer to all of the boys

Especially Hoseok

He remained your biggest ally and most trusted confidant, and you quickly became best friends

Those hours of downtime in dressing rooms were some of the most fun of your week

They were also some of the longest, as you spent many of them waiting on the boys to fulfil their responsibilities

But their staff members were very accommodating - having been instructed to respect and protect you - and you even made friends with a few of the the stylists

When the guys didn’t have obligations, Yoongi spent every waking (and non-waking) moment with you

On the second day of your stay, Yoongi gave you a private tour of Genius Lab

At first, he seemed shy and self-conscious about showing you such an important part of his life

But when he sat in front of his computer, Yoongi casually pulled you down to sit with him, reaching his arms around you and resting his chin on your shoulder as he played you a couple of beats

And next thing you knew you were turned around on his lap, exchanging heated kisses as Yoongi leaned back in his office chair

Eventually, you forced yourselves to leave the studio

But not before Yoongi gave you the passcode, and told you to feel free to use it anytime

Which you did, every chance you got

You loved to see him in his element, and were content to just sit and listen to him work for hours

You’d thumb through his Ikea catalogs while you listened, nodding along to his beats

And you often brought him coffee or lunch, to keep his energy up

On the third day, you found time to play some one-on-one basketball

Which Yoongi let you win

And you let him think he let you win

You also cooked dinner together a few nights

Stole a nap together more than once

Binge-watched The Lord of the Rings together

And spent every night secure in each other’s arms

Yoongi may have been worried he couldn’t be the kind of boyfriend you wanted

But he was

He absolutely was

Completely unlike his cold, unfeeling, disinterested, tough-guy persona, he was nothing but soft and caring with you

Just as you’d always known he would be

And the first time he referred to you as his girlfriend - on the fourth day, when he told Jin to stop bothering you with his dad jokes - it made your heart skip a beat

You still had to be mindful in public and around cameras, but it wasn’t as bad as you thought, and it got easier every day

In fact, Yoongi found it remarkable how well - and how quickly - you were able to adapt to his chaotic life

Last Night in Seoul

Before you knew it, it was your final night in Korea

As you as laid together in Yoongi’s bed - after having shared your last meal with all the members - your head and heart were both fit to burst

You couldn’t bear the thought of saying goodbye to Yoongi in the morning

Especially without telling him you loved him

And when Yoongi kissed you slowly and deeply...

After his eyes caressed your face as he told you how breathtakingly beautiful you are…

You were overcome by the desire to show him - physically - how much you loved him

Your hands fumbled to grasp his shirt, and pull it up over his head

But Yoongi stopped you as soon as he realized your intent

“Not like this,” He said

Not rushed

Not urgent

Not desperate

As much as he wanted you - and he wanted you very much - he didn’t want to take this step just because you were leaving the next day and felt like you were out of time

He wanted to wait until the moment was right

When he could take his time with you, and treat you the way you deserved to be treated

You couldn’t help but be disappointed by his response

But deep down you appreciated how much he respected you, and you knew he was right

So you only stayed up talking that night

And as hard as it was, you refrained from ever blurting out, “I love you”

Because you wanted to wait for the right moment, too

“Home” At Last

Leaving Korea the next morning was one of the hardest things you ever had to do

But you managed to save your tears until after you hugged all the boys, kissed Yoongi, and climbed into the car that would take you to the airport

Before you left, Yoongi bought a return ticket for you to visit again the next month

And you promised each other to keep in constant contact until then

But as the driver pulled away from the boys’ apartment complex and you waved to each other until you were out of sight…

You felt like you were leaving half of yourself behind

Sentimental

When you were finally home, it seemed as though you had been gone much longer than 2 weeks

And, if you were honest, it didn’t really feel like home anymore

You tried to return to your normal routine, to immerse yourself in your work that you loved

But now that you knew what it was like to have Yoongi in your life, normal life felt…

Empty without him

You kept in touch and communicated through texts and calls everyday

Any spare minute Yoongi could find in his hectic schedule, he would video chat with you

He always made time for you, and always made an effort to be open and vulnerable with you

And though he rarely said it in so many words, you could tell he missed you just as much as you missed him

Hearing Yoongi’s deep voice and seeing his handsome face always put you at ease

But no call was ever long enough

And after one particularly brief conversation, you idly began researching how to apply for a visa

You also hated not saying “I love you” every time you said goodbye

But you didn’t want the first time you told Yoongi to be over the phone

So you made up your mind that the next time you saw him, you would tell him no matter what

Firsts

Finally, after what felt like a never-ending month, you found yourself back in Yoongi’s studio

And in his arms - where you’d been longing to be - as he played a new song for you

It was softer and more melodic than his usual style

He sang along to the music, his voice smooth and low, and you quickly realized…

It was a love song

And when the last notes faded out, he admitted that he wrote it for you

With tears brimming in your eyes, you couldn’t contain yourself any longer

Your words spilling out of you, you told Yoongi you loved the song

And you loved him

So, so much

Yoongi wiped your tears with a soft smirk

That’s what he was going to say

You stole the words right out of his mouth, he teased you

You chuckled, apologizing, but Yoongi shook his head

And as he kissed you tenderly, he said he loved you

So, so much

He’d been falling for you all along, he told you, but when you left last month…

He immediately noticed how empty his studio, his bed, his life, and his heart, felt without you

And that was when he realized he was completely in love with you

It was impossible to describe how you felt hearing Yoongi speak those 3 little words

Finally being able to say those 3 little words to him felt almost as good

And you looked forward to saying - and hearing - them often from then on out

For the rest of the day, Yoongi could hardly keep his hands off of you

And later that night, he did more than say “I love you”

Though he did say it, over and over

But he also showed you how much he loved you

Physically, for the first time

And contrary to most fanfiction you’d come across, Yoongi was not rough

In reality, he was gentle and sweet and soft and caring and loving and patient and giving and...

Perfect

Everything about that night was perfect

And more than worth the wait

Yoongi marveled at and worshiped every inch of you

He made you feel so loved

And beautiful

And good

More than once

You didn’t take a single moment of the experience for granted

You were mindful to appreciate every detail, to admire everything about Yoongi

And you made sure he felt just as loved - and as good - as you did

That visit was a turning point for your relationship

Yoongi had made it clear - in more ways than one - that any fear he may have felt about falling in love was long gone

And when you returned home, your mind was made up

So you secretly began applying for a work visa in earnest

Because seeing the man you loved so infrequently was only getting harder and harder to bear

Bon Voyage On Air

The next time you visited Yoongi was another month later

And your season of Bon Voyage premiered that same week

So with plenty of snacks and drinks, you gathered in the dorm living room with all the boys and watched the first episode together

Seeing the footage of your incredible journey brought back so many feelings and memories, and it was so fun to reminisce with everyone

But you noticed the editors made suggestive comments every time you and Yoongi were on screen together

Nothing obvious, just subtle little remarks about how cute you were around each other and how fond you seemed to be of one another

You hoped it wouldn’t be enough to make viewers suspect anything about the true nature of your relationship

But the other members noticed, and it was enough for them to tease you and Yoongi

A few weeks later, after several episodes of Bon Voyage had aired, it came to your attention that ARMY had picked up on the chemistry between you and Yoongi

Speculation as to whether you were dating was all over the internet

A lot of fans eagerly shipped you together

As Yoongi had predicted, they found you very likeable, and it was easy to see how well you got along

But there were also plenty of “fans” who had some not very nice things to say about you

Yoongi comforted you when you saw some of the negative comments, and begged you to not worry about any of it

He assured you that things would blow over

And if they didn’t…

Well, you’d deal with that when the time came

The Holiday Season

The next month, BTS had several appearances scheduled in the U.S., so Yoongi arranged for you to meet up with them

One event was a Christmas concert, and you agreed to exchange gifts afterwards because you wouldn't be able to be together Christmas day

You gave Yoongi an authentic chef’s coat with his name embroidered, and a certificate for a couples cooking class

Both of which he moaned and grumbled about

But you knew by the way his eyes twinkled that he was touched, and that he secretly loved his gift

Yoongi gave you a gorgeous, one-of-a-kind light fixture he’d commissioned from a local artist in Seoul

And when you opened the box, you found yourself doing something you never imagined you would do:

Crying over a lamp

Yoongi looked scared when he saw the tears running down your cheeks

But when you managed to articulate that they were happy tears and you loved your present, he grinned and you pulled him into a crushing hug

The week between Christmas and New Year’s, you received word that your work visa had finally been approved

BTS was going to perform in Times Square on New Year’s Eve, so you planned tell Yoongi the good news then

You had to wait behind the scenes while he and the boys were onstage during the countdown

But Yoongi kissed you the moment they returned to the dressing room

And when you told him that you were moving to Korea, he was so stunned he didn’t know what to say

The other members reacted so enthusiastically to your announcement - jumping, dancing, and shouting - that you wouldn’t have heard Yoongi speak anyway

But you could see the tears gathering in his eyes, and they - along with his gummy smile - told you everything he couldn’t say

Moving to South Korea

Over the next month, you happily packed up your entire life and moved to Seoul

Though you didn’t have an apartment lined up yet, you did manage to find an amazing job opportunity with a local interior design company

But all of the guys urged you to not to wait any longer, because they’d be releasing their new album soon and would be busier than ever

They were only too happy to let you stay with them until you found your own place

You didn’t want to take advantage of their hospitality but, once again, Yoongi promised he’d take care of everything

It was only when you were standing inside an empty but beautiful, luxury apartment in an upscale neighborhood not far from the dorms, that you realized how he intended to keep his promise

Yoongi explained that even though all 7 boys chose to still live together, several of them actually owned their own homes

They kept them mostly as investments, but they occasionally came in handy

Like now, when you needed a place to live

The apartment you were in was Yoongi’s private suite

And he wanted you to have it

You tried to decline, saying he was being way too generous and you couldn’t accept

But he insisted

He wanted you close by, he wanted you to be somewhere safe

And he liked the idea of sharing his home with you

But if it would make you feel better, he smirked, he could always charge you rent

You were still hesitant

But then he showed you around the place, pointing out his favorite architectural details, telling you about his plans for its design, and asking you for your professional opinion...

And he was just so cute and eager you couldn’t refuse

So you moved in right away, and you and Yoongi thoroughly enjoyed working together to pick all the paint colors, the furniture, the decorations, and - especially - the light fixtures

As always, you were a great team

Your Christmas present was the perfect final, finishing touch to your new home

And though Yoongi maintained his main residence with the other members…

He probably spent more time at your place than at the dorms

Isolated Together

The next few months were hectic, for you and the boys

You were adjusting to living and working in a new city, and they were gone a lot to promote their new album (which you loved)

But you were so proud of them, and remained their biggest fan, always cheering them on and supporting them

And Yoongi never failed to make time for you

Whether it was by sharing a cup of coffee, a meal, or the couch while you watched a show

Yoongi always took the time to remind you how much he loved you

So you never once regretted your decision to move to Korea

Then a global pandemic turned life upside down

All the members were deeply disappointed when they had to cancel their world tour, and you were heartbroken for them

You knew better than most how hard they’d been preparing for it

But they stayed positive, and took advantage of the unexpected extra time, relaxing and trying new hobbies while in isolation

You were able to work remotely during that time, and stayed at the dorms with Yoongi and the boys

And you cherished the opportunity to be together even more often

You spent a lot of time in Yoongi’s studio as he put the finishing touches on his mixtape

But you also enjoyed several leisure activities together

Like painting

And playing video games (You dominated Mario Kart, but he was the surprising champion of Just Dance)

You even convinced Yoongi to sew a few throw pillows with you for your couch

Then as the release date for Yoongi’s mixtape approached, you accompanied him to the set of the music video for his first single

And your jaw dropped when you saw him in his costume

He looked amazing

Amazingly hot

Because he’d dyed his hair black a few days prior and you missed his light-colored locks, seeing Yoongi in a long blonde wig was particularly…

Exciting

And you may have bribed the costume department to let him keep the outfit

Your relationship progressed a lot in those months, and you grew to understand and respect each other on a deeper level

Though some couples naturally got on each other’s nerves the more time they spent together, the opposite was true for you and Yoongi

Sure, you disagreed occasionally, but you never fought

Yoongi was infinitely patient with you, and often told you that you had calming effect on him

Your personalities were just so compatible, and things only got easier and better the longer you were together

And as it became increasingly apparent how well both of you - together, as a couple - worked…

It became harder and harder to imagine your lives without one another

The Secret’s Out

After Yoongi’s mixtape was released and saw much success, you were ridiculously proud of him

You blasted his songs every chance you got, and constantly showered him with praise

But with so much media attention focused on Yoongi, ARMY once again started getting suspicious about your relationship

Rumors about you moving to Korea had been circulating for a while

And despite taking extra care to stay off camera whenever one of the boys went live, it somehow got out that you were in quarantine with them

What’s more, it wasn’t hard for ARMY to notice how happy Yoongi had been

Eventually, it got to the point where management felt like they needed to be involved

The higher ups at Big Hit wanted to deny everything, and were sure they could convince the public that you were just a friend - to all the members

But after some long talks and careful consideration, you and Yoongi decided that you didn’t want to deny or hide anything anymore

You knew how you felt about each other, and you knew it wasn’t going to change

You were in each other’s lives for good

So the company released a statement confirming your relationship, saying you’d been together since Bon Voyage wrapped

And the internet exploded

A K-Pop idol publicly dating someone was highly unprecedented

But to your relief, the majority of ARMYs were supportive

And they advocated that if Yoongi was happy, everyone should be happy for him

Of course there were still others who felt you didn’t deserve him, or that Yoongi should leave the group

But together you were able to disregard any hate, and just enjoy being with each other openly

A little while later, after the initial shock of your relationship announcement had worn off, the Bon Voyage producers contacted you

Due to the ongoing pandemic, they’d made some adjustments to the show’s format

They’d decided to film in an isolated location in Korea instead of traveling outside the country, and they changed the name to In the Soop

And since you and Yoongi were public now, and because your inclusion in the previous season had been such a success…

They invited you to join BTS for another adventure

Love

Taglist: @bucky-thorin-winchester @yvemoon @serpentiinequeen @neilpoetssociety @narcissism-iskey @kaitswrld

#bts #bts fanfiction #min yoongi #suganetwork #hyunglinenetwork #bts bon voyage #bts headcanons #yoongi x reader #bts imagines #bts fanfic #bts scenarios #bts suga #bts fluff #bts imagines suga #bts fics #bts fic #bon voyage season 4

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purpleyellow · 5 years ago

Text

Bon Voyage season 4

BTS 8th member

Sunny’s masterlist

“Sunny during Bon Voyage 4″ Shout out to the Bon Voyage anon!

a/n: It took a while but it’s done. Your opinion is very important for me, send feedback and requests anytime 💜 Also, don’t be shy and interact a little, ask box is always open

(Italics means the person is speaking in English)

“It’ll be around 45 minutes until we get to the destination” Jimin spoke from the passenger seat after reading the GPS.

Jungkook nodded while starting the camping trailer they were in and Suny got comfortable in the small table the van had, Hoseok and Taehyung sat in front of her. The other members were driving in an SUV.

“Are you going to read during the trip?” Hobi asked the girl pointing to the book she had placed on top of the table “We’ll probably be noisy so I don’t know if it’s the best idea right now”

As he said that, Jimin pressed play on his phone and the melody of Ddaeng started playing as Taehyung turned the electric microphone on, singing with his whole soul and ignoring the two members talking.

“I was going to see if I would be able to read without having motion sickness but I guess I won’t be able to do that now” She sighed looking at the noisy boys and head bopping to the beat. “Ahh, New Zealand”

Looking out of the window, Sunny got lost in the view as she sang along with the boys, the small road trip passing by relatively fast for her.

“Okay, let’s go,” J-Hope said opening the backdoor of the vehicle and the three members in the back instantly got hit by a very cold breeze “Maybe not without coats,” He said turning around and Sunny grabbed the big trench jacket she had miraculously found in the store they had gone to earlier.

Putting on the black thing on top of her jeans and pink sweater, she finally got out of the car and ran to the fence that divided a big field filled with sheep. Waving at them, she unintentionally caught the attention of the pastor there.

“You guys are recording something?” the middle-aged man asked her pointing at the cameras recording the rest of the members who were only starting to make their way to where she was.

“Yes, it’s kind of a Reality thing” She answered and smiled politely, not wanting to give off too much information about what they were doing.

“Oh okay, I’ll see if the dog brings them over so you and your friends can interact with them” The man did a head nod and whistled to the dog. Jungkook approached Sunny after a little sprint, leaning on the fence as well to get a better look in the approaching sheep. “Come inside, there’s no problem”

Opening a little gate for them, and the other members, a few of them walked inside and started taking pictures with the animals and the landscape for a moment, until it got too cold for them and they decided to go inside to grab warm drinks.

��Are you ordering?” Sunny asked Hoseok as Namjoon told him the same of the drinks and he nodded to her.

“Putting to work the English I learned in the US” He smiled and waved the waiter over “You want coffee right?”

“You got it” She answered him in English making RM chuckle. They walked together to the table and waited for the waiter to bring them their drinks.

The group spent a good amount of time just sitting in the small restaurant as some of them rested and J-Hope and Taehyung recorded the Chicken Noodle Soup challenge. Retuning to the campervan, they sat in the same arrangement and tried to pass time since the trip would take a long time.

“Let’s play that game where you have to rhyme” Jimin spoke loud enough from the passenger seat so everyone could hear him.

“Which one? The poem thing?” J-Hope asked locking his phone and putting it away.

“I don’t know. Let’s just have one person say something and then somebody else rhymes with it until everyone had a go” He explained while still giving out directions “Taehyung you can start”

“Roses are red, violets are blue” He said without thinking too much.

“I was born smart, what happened to you” Sunny completed with the first thing that came into her mind making Hoseok and Jimin laugh while V widened his eyes.

“That’s not the direction I was going for but okay,” He said repressing a smile.

“I want to start, let me think,” Jungkook said from the driver’s seat and thought for a second before speaking and leaving everyone dumbfounded “Roses are red, corpses are blue”

“Sorry you’re dead, I forgot you’re allergic to roses,” Sunny said without really thinking and making the rest of the boys laugh once again “Oh, it doesn’t really rhyme”

“What’s up with you today?” Jimin turned around to look at her and she just shrugged.

“Kook was the one bringing up dead people”

The BTS members had just arrived at an observatory when the sun started setting, having to wait for it to be completely dark before looking at the stars, the members parted ways, some of them going inside the small cafe to stay warm, while the others, Sunny included, stayed outside to look at the landscape or shoot J-Hope’s challenge (a very recurring theme in this trip).

“We should have bought more coats, it gets too cold during the night” Namjoon noted while he and the girl were walking around and taking pictures of the view.

“Yeah, I have like this thing and a hoddie in my backpack,” Sunny said looking down at her clothes and staring out again “It’s fun to have a change for once, we usually go to warm places for Bon Voyage”

“Agreed, although I miss the warmth a little” He chuckled kicking a rock and pondering for a moment before speaking again “I have so much to do back home, it’s like my mind can’t stay focused and enjoy what’s going on in that moment”

“Oppa, I think you’re going through work abstinence,” Sunny said with a breathy laugh.

“The weird thing is when I was on vacation back in Europe I wasn’t feeling like this. But now, it’s like the cameras triggered my memory and everything that was on hold keeps showing up in my head” He sighed stopping in his tracks and looking around to see if anyone was recording them. Although the mics were capturing all the words, the audio wouldn’t have a use unless there was footage.

“We won’t go back to actually work in a week, but I guess you can find some time to rest your conscience and run over the lyrics I wrote over the break” She smiled sheepishly and shrugged her shoulders.

“You didn’t rest?” He turned around to her with a shocked face and tried pinching her arm, although all he did was twist the fabric of her coat.

“I did. I spent some time with friends and stayed with my mom for some weeks. But when I had nothing to do I wrote a little, not my fault I wasn’t in some foreign country like most of you” She winked making him roll his eyes.

“Not fair, I’m as much as a workaholic like you. Now I feel even worst for not being productive”

“You’re the biggest workaholic in this place, maybe with the exception of Yoongi Oppa but you get me” She placed a hand on his arm and turned around so they could go back to the little restaurant. “That means you deserved to rest more than anyone here. So tell me, did you find a girlfriend during your break like JK?”

“Please don’t remember me those rumors,” He said now fake annoyed and smiling at the situation. “I’m kind of worried for him still”

“He does seem a bit quieter than usual” Sunny noted “I just wanted to talk to him for a bit and get him to vent for once, he seemed so stress when I called him one day”

“Yeah, let’s give him time. I’ll chat with him if I get the chance and I’ll tell him you’re worried too”

“Thanks, on a random note, I’m still not 100% used to seeing him with tattoos, but it does fit his image for some reason” Sunny smiled along and they joined the rest of the group.

Waiting for a few more minutes inside, the members had a pleasant surprise once they walked out and the sky was completely full of stars. The desert-like place helped to make visible the whole milky way, making a lot of amused sounds leave their mouths.

“It’s insane to think that’s over us all the time and we can’t see it” Yoongi said from somewhere near her and Sunny nodded along, even though it was too dar for anyone to see her.

“The camera can’t capture it like I’m seeing it” Jungkook complained while trying to take a picture and Sunny grabbed her own phone to see if she was luckier than him.

“There’s no use trying to take pictures,” One of the observatory people told her and pointed to the telescope they were walking to “You’ll have a better sight with that, but everything is going to be stored in your memory”

“Oh, so like, not even the crew is going to capture the sky like this?”

“I’m afraid not,” He told her and she nodded “I’ve seen they have some professional cameras so maybe a picture that comes close to it”

Smiling at his reassurance, Sunny walked a little faster to be able to look through the telescope before the other members.

“It’s dark, stop running or you’ll trip” She heard Jin speaking from her left but she ignored him, going straight to the object and bending a little so she could see better.

“Woah” Sunny gasped with how close the stars appeared, their shine being indescribably beautiful, but the moment got interrupted by Jimin patting her on the back.

“I want to see it too” He insisted until she moved along, of course stealing a last look to hopefully remember that sight forever.

After the two accommodations they had gone to, BTS finally arrived at the place they would be camping for two days.

To be honest, Sunny wasn’t too excited about it, sure she had gone camping with her parents as a child, but she knew the boys wouldn’t just let her run around and play with flowers like she used to, not that she would do that anyway but it still would be nice not have to light up a fire like she was doing right now.

“Why can’t I help them with the tent?” Sunny asked Jin, who was next to her trying to do the same thing.

“Because they learned how to do it last season when you were doing nothing because of a small cut” He reminded her of the excused the had used last time and Sunny tried not to smile.

“It hurt okay, I still have the scar on my foot”

“Show me then” Jin challenged her, knowing it was a lie and Sunny shrugged.

“It’s cold, I’m not taking my shoe off,” She said and sighed when the small flame she had going died once again. “I don’t think I’ll be able to light this”

“Of course you are, just keep fanning it,” Jin said handing her a frying pan, to which she frowned at “What? It helps to make more wind, you’ll thank me once it works”

“Alright then” She grabbed the pan and started fanning the fire more aggressively, her arm growing tired sooner than anticipated, but the flame got bigger none the less and at some point, the fire was strong enough to live by itself.

Massaging the muscle on her arm, Sunny got up from her crouched position and walked over to the campervan, where Taehyung was grabbing some things to decorate the tent they had just built.

“Can you help me carry those things outside?” He asked and gave her a bunch of fairy lights after she agreed.

“Do you know who will be sleeping here tonight?” She asked him once they were inside the orange tent and watched as he hung the lights on the walls.

“I think it’s Yoongi Hyung and Namjoon Hyung” V answered “I’m staying in the trailer with Hobi Hyung, Jimin, and Jk. Are you really staying in the SUV with Jin Hyung? We can make room for you if you want to”

Taehyung recalled the conversation they had earlier when Jin said he didn’t like sleeping on sleeping bags and since there was no room in the van he would just lay one of the car’s seats down and sleep there. Sunny said she could do the same since she didn’t want to make the trailer’s bed too crowded.

“I can give it a try, it’s no big deal,” She said getting out of the tent with him. “If it gets too uncomfortable we’ll change the sleeping settings tomorrow”

“Okay then, if you want to wake me up in the middle and trade places I’m okay with it” V smiled and they walked to where the rest of the members were getting ready to have diner.

“Why are you going to do this when last time you almost died with only having diner in a suspended table?” Hoseok laughed at Sunny when they arrived in the place they would be going on this insane swing.

“Because since last time everyone keeps saying I’m scared of heights, I’m here to prove I’m not,” She said determined but her palms were slightly sweaty.

Of course, it was normal to get a little scared before going on a 300-meter swing that could probably lead to your death, that did not mean she was afraid of heights, it only meant Sunny had the self-preservation instinct that people like Jungkook didn’t seem to have.

“You should go on the catapult thing as well,” He said while bouncing on his place and the rest of the boys bought their tickets.

“I’m already going on the swing of death, I don’t want to be thrown into it as well” She mumbled holding onto his arm, to both keep him in place and relieve some of the nervousness she was feeling.

After getting into the special gear and both Jimin and Yoongi had declined multiple times the opportunity to do it, the group moved along the bridge that they would be “jumping” from. Holding onto Jungkook’s shoulders, Sunny tried her best to not look down and quickly got over that part.

“We doing the swing part in pairs, so Jin Hyung and Hobi, me and Taehyung, ad then you and Jungkook okay?” Namjoon asked her once they were on the platform thing and watching Jin and Hoseok get settled on the thing.

“Okay” She said strangely more calm than before, mostly due to the instructors making sure the equipment on her groupmates was very well adjusted before letting them hang over the edge of the platform.

The sudden drop and the boys’ scream startled her a little, but Sunny couldn’t hide the smile on her face seeing how much fun they were having on the swing. So she sat next to Jimin on the steps and cheered Taehyung, who was far more scared than her when it was his turn.

“We’re doing it like the others okay?” Sunny turned to Jk once they were waiting for Namjoon and V to get back on the platform. “No funny ideas or things to make this any more dangerous than it is”

“Sure, sure,” He said jumping excited for their turn, and once the instructor asked them which way they were going to drop he nonchalantly answered “Upsidedown”

“No, no” Sunny exclaimed shaking her head. She had watched four people safely drop on the thing sitting down, she would safely do it sitting down as well.

“Yes, yes. Upsidedown” Jungkook repeated making the woman smile.

“He can go upsidedown and you can sit normally after him. How does that sound?” She asked politely making Sunny consider going alone.

“Can I do it first then?” She asked turning around to one of the producers to ask if it would make the content less exciting. Giving her a thumbs up, Sunny took it as a yes and turned to the instructor again.

“Sure, you can go in any other you want” She waved the girl near the edge and started to fix her gear.

“Wow, you’re making me wait more because you’re too scared” Jungkook laughed watching from her side and leaning on one of the security bars.

“I’m swinging off this thing by myself, I think the only thing you can’t call me right now is scared” She rolled her eyes at him and heard Jin laughing at their exchange.

“Okay, you can sit and take your feet off the edge,” She said, and in that moment, sitting seconds away from a 70-meter free-fall and 300-meter arc swing, Sunny felt scared shitless.

She looked ahead to the instructor and blocked out any kind of noise around her, not really knowing what was going on or how much longer until she would fall onto her inevitable death backward, the only thing she could feel was her heart beating out of her chest.

It came out of nowhere, but suddenly she felt all of her body drop and a scream leave her mouth, instantly gripping onto the swing’s ropes. After a few milliseconds that felt like ages, she finally could feel the security stuff holding her body in place and preventing her to slip and die. Her screams turning into a laugh as she started to swing on the huge thing.

“I’m gonna swing, from the chandelier” Sunny sang as the thing lost momentum and looked around at the mountains around her. The adrenaline running crazy on her body as she leaned her body back every time the swing went back.

“Were you singing Sia?” Jimin asked once she made back to the platform making the girl laugh.

“Did you hear that from here?”

Getting out of the helicopter, Sunny stretched a bit and walked along the mountain of snow, following her members. She saw a few of them making snowballs, and falling in the snow so she thought she should do the same.

Falling back on the snow, she moved her arms up and down hoping to make a snow angel, but once she got up it didn’t look like one at all.

“That doesn’t look quite right” Yoongi smiled at the weird blob on the ground and helped her get some of the snow off her hair.

“I don’t know where I was aiming with that, to be honest” Sunny said shaking her coat. “What are the others doing?”

“Jimin and Taehyung are walking around and doing something I don’t understand and the rest are building a snowman” Suga said and started walking with her to where the rest of them were.

“Sunny, do you have something to put on it?” Hoseok screamed for her pointing at the two balls of snow that barely looked like a snowman.

Taking off her beanie, she threw it to him and walked closer, looking for things that could make the “statue” more human-like.

Placing a pair of glasses on its face and a scarf around its neck, the members decided they had done a good enough job and walked away, looking for more things to do.

“Hey, look at this” Jimin approached her with a concerned face and a hand full of snow. “Is this an insect?”

Leaning down to look at what he was showing her, Sunny didn’t react fast enough when he lifted up his hand and smeared snow on her face.

“Really?” Sunny screamed after taking some of the snow off her eyes and looked around to see the boy jumping excited and grinning mischievously. Running towards him to push him on the ground, she got slowed down by the snow and failed to do it, instead of holding him in place and kicking the back of his knee to somehow take him down, which she also failed to do.

Looking at them from afar, Jin sighed and looked at Suga “Why are they like this?”

END OF THE TRIP INTERVIEW

1.What did you think when you heard you were coming to New Zealand?

“I liked it but it wasn’t anything special. Like I had heard good things about it and was interested in some of the videos the guys showed me so I thought it would be fun to come here, and it really was.”

2. This was your first work after vacation. How was it?

“I didn’t travel anywhere during the vacation, mostly because I wanted to see some people and I couldn’t do that if I was away, but also because I knew we were going to come to New Zealand right after and I just realized I didn’t have this extra need for going away and spending time outside of Korea. It sure was fun to spend this time with the members after not having them on my daily routine like I’m used to, it consolidated in my mind that no matter the time we spend apart this group of people will always feel like family.”

3. What did you like the most?

“I really enjoyed the overall feel of the country. I don’t know how to explain, but everywhere we went the sky was always beautiful, the landscape, the mountains, the roads we went through, everything was always beautiful, and even though my nose is stuffy and my fingers froze a lot, the weather feels so cozy and so nice. This just seems like one of those places you go backpacking with your friends and the fact that we did exactly that feels really good to me”

4. When did you feel bad or disappointed?

“Hmm… I don’t think I felt disappointed about anything, but since we changed locations so many times this trip, it did cross my mind how I wasn’t much use whenever we went to another accommodation since I don’t drive and couldn’t really help them whenever someone got tired and needed a rest. Also, I don’t think I was that entertaining this time, so sorry for the people watching this”

5. How did you feel about this trip?

“Everything was really nice. Compared to the last time we spent most of the trip together as a group instead of pairs, and that made me grateful for all of the members’ presence. Also, the destination really made me want to come back, with them but also with the rest of the people I love”

6. To ARMYs who’d watch Bon Voyage Season Four

“I said it before, but first I’m sorry if I didn’t appear as entertaining. I hope you understand that I truly liked this trip and was just living through it in my own way instead of exaggerating it and making it seem fake. Everything was perfect and I hope you can have some enjoyment just watching the members being ourselves”

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theotherackerman · 3 years ago

Text

My Mind Turns Your Life Into Folklore

NOTES: New Year’s Day January 1st, Friday

Trigger warning: mentions of self harm and suicide.

song credit:

exile- taylor swift featuring bon iver, Ymir is singing the first verse that bon iver sings

CHAPTER FOUR: second, third, and hundredth chances

As she drove out the cemetery, she began to realize how strange this truly was. Eren used to be the one who drove everywhere. Mikasa wasn’t a big fan of driving due to the car accident she had been through as a child. It was a necessary evil in her mind. Yet here she was driving Eren home. Their roles had reversed in a sense.

“Do you not drive anymore?” She broke the awkward silence between them.

“Not really.”

“Can I ask why?”

“You can but I won’t tell you.”

Mikasa was glad the roads were empty as she slammed on the breaks. Eren jolted forward and then back again.

“Mikasa!”

“Stop it! Just stop! Stop acting like this. What could I have possibly done to make you act like this? What did I love you too much? Did I give you too much? Just tell me what I did!” Mikasa had broken. The sadness inside her had been replaced with nothing but pure rage. “You owe me that much, Eren.”

Eren sighed, “fine, just get out of the middle of the street.”

Mikasa began driving again.

Eren sighed again. “I don’t drive because I don’t have a license anymore.”

“Why don’t you have a license anymore?” She had a feeling, in the pit of her stomach, that she already knew.

“Because I crashed my car when I was drunk. Hit a building. No one was hurt besides me. Car was totaled. Building was set for demolition anyway so the people really didn’t care. Spent the night handcuffed to a hospital bed while Zeke worked everything else out with lawyers. Just ended up losing my license.”

“Is that why you couldn’t walk?”

“No, that was because of my liver.”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

“I didn’t think you’d care.”

Mikasa stopped at the red light and looked over at Eren. He was staring out the window, no emotion on his face.

The rest of the ride was spent in silence until they reached the old house. Mikasa knew this house as well as she knew her own home with Levi. She was shocked to see a for sale sign on the front lawn.

“You’re selling it?” She asked as she pulled into the driveway and parked.

“Yeah, I’m never here. I’m at Zeke’s place most of the time. I only moved back here temporarily to get the house in order to sell.”

Mikasa hadn’t expected that to hurt but it did for some reason. She had spent a lot of time here as a child. She could still see Carla in the kitchen watching over her, Armin, and Eren.

She understood it though. She had moved to the city with her friends, after all.

“Did you want to come in?” He asked after a few moments of awkward silence.

“Yeah, I’ll come in.”

“Okay,” Eren got out of the car first and she followed him, locking her car behind her.

Eren unlocked the door and held it open for Mikasa to come in.

“Thanks,” she told him as she walked in.

Stacks of boxes were all over the living room, that was the only thing that had changed. The walls were still covered in pictures, the bookshelves were still full. Mikasa began to wander the room but she didn’t dare look at the pictures. The couch was still in the middle of the room, tv mounted on the wall. Grisha’s leather chair and Carla’s rocking chair were still side by side.

She missed Carla. She could see her sitting there in her mind. Her welcoming smile. She missed the woman as much as Eren did. She rested her hand on the chair for a moment as if she was willing Carla to come back to life. She couldn’t help but wonder if Carla was here, would this still have happened?

“What did I do wrong?” She asked again as she turned around to face him.

Eren sighed, “nothing.”

“Well, there has to be something for you to say those horrible things! Eren…”

Eren sat down on the couch. “It’s better this way.”

“Why?”

He stood up and began to walk away.

“Why?” She knew she was pressing her luck but she didn’t care. She could feel the rage running through her veins like she had in the car.

“Because I’ll be a burden to you!” He yelled.

“You don’t get to make that choice!”

Eren stopped and silently turned towards her.

“Maybe I wanted to share your burdens!” She took a step closer to him. “That’s what friends do. I thought I was more than that. I thought I was family.”

“That’s all? Family?” he scoffed.

“Eren...I thought I was your future.”

Eren moved from across the room so quickly Mikasa wasn’t able to process what was going on until his lips were on hers. His hands were in her short hair, he wasn’t pulling away this time. She responded, moving her lips against his. Oh, how she had missed this. Her hands gripped onto his shirt pulling him closer to her. He walked her backwards so that her back was pressed against the wall. Just as she wrapped her legs around his waist, the front door opened.

“OH! I’ll come back later…”

With that, the door closed again.

Both of them began to blush as they untangled themselves from one another.

“Zeke?” Mikasa asked and Eren nodded.

“Zeke. Guess he got done with….whatever he was doing earlier.”

“He says you’re an asshole and a fucking idiot. His words, not mine,” Mikasa laughed a little.

“He’s not wrong,” Eren laughed before looking away from her.

“Talk to Armin. He needs you. Talk to me. Don’t...push us away...again.” She reached out and touched his face, making him look at her again.

“Mikasa, I’m fucked up, more than you know and once you know….” He placed his hand over hers on his face.

“What am I going to do? Run? I’m not a coward!” She removed her hand from his face and took a step back.

Eren sighed again, “you two are better off without me.”

“I told you, you don’t get to make that choice. Armin and I will. I leave on the 8th. I’ll talk to Armin, we’ll meet before then.”

“You’re not giving me a choice here, are you?” He asked as he walked back over to the couch and sat down.

“No, I’m not. You owe Armin and I the truth. All of it. You have the same number?” She pulled out her phone.

Eren nodded, “yeah. I didn’t change it. Do you still have it?”

“I couldn’t delete you. I tried but...I couldn’t.” She put her phone back into her pocket.

There was a knock on the door before it opened.

“Sorry to interrupt but I seemed to have locked the keys in the van,” Zeke announced as he walked in.

“I should be going anyway, Levi is probably wondering where I am.”

Eren just nodded.

“I’ll see you later, Eren,” she promised.

And with that, Mikasa walked to the door.

“OW! What was that for?!” She heard Eren yell as she began to close the door.

“You are a fucking idiot, that’s what.” Zeke replied.

Mikasa couldn’t help but smile to herself as she walked to her car.

----------------------------------------

“So I see you listened and talked to her. I can leave once we get the car unlocked and you can continue...wear protection..” Zeke said as went to the closet to grab a wire hanger.

“I’m not going to have sex with Mikasa after you leave. It was just...the heat of the moment…” Eren said as his face went red and he rubbed the back of his neck.

“And if I would not have walked it?” Zeke smirked.

“Please stop,” Eren pleaded as he walked out of the door.

“I just want to make sure my little brother is prepared,” Zeke called after him as he followed Eren out the door.

“Stop. I hate you, you know that?” Eren said as he walked towards the van.

“That is a lie and we both know it. I told you to talk to her and I was right.”

“Please stop talking. When does Pieck get done today? Isn’t it time for you to annoy her yet?”

“No, unfortunately she is booked with engagement shoots today.”

“Just give me the damn hanger,” Eren sighed as he held his hand out.

------------------------------------------------------

When Mikasa arrived at the Ackerman house, this time she was not greeted by two barking puppies. As she took her shoes off at the front door, she noticed the dogs were nowhere to be seen.

“Levi and Hange left with the dogs,” she heard Ymir’s voice say.

“What are you doing here? I thought you went with Historia.”

“I did. Then Rod kicked me out. Historia had the limo drop me back off.”

Mikasa could hear the coffee maker running.

The amount of coffee that Ymir drank in a single day was ridiculous.

“Why?” Mikasa hung her jacket up on the coat hanger by the door. She then remembered she still had Eren’s in her bag, wherever Levi had put it. She made a mental note to find it and give it back to him.

“Because he’s an ass. I don’t know. He wanted to talk to her and Freida about something. Apparently, I’m not family as he likes to remind me constantly. So I came back here. Levi and Hange were leaving just as I came in. I have no idea where they went. ” Ymir came from the kitchen holding a cup of coffee. “So you going to tell me why you have sex hair?” She asked as she raised an eyebrow.

“ I don’t have sex hair!” Mikasa protested.

“Okay, if you say so,” Ymir said as she lifted the coffee cup.

“....I ran into Eren at the graveyard.”

“So you had sex with your ex at the graveyard. I mean sounds weird to me but if that’s what you’re into, I’m not going to judge.”

“I didn’t have sex with Eren at the graveyard! I drove him home and we got into a fight. I told him he owed me an explanation for everything. So he invited me in.”

“So you had sex with your ex at his house? Boring but okay.”

“I didn’t have sex with Eren! We just...kissed...but more than last night.”

“You kissed Eren last night?!”

“Well he kissed me but it wasn’t long. Then he left but this time, Zeke came in.”

“So his brother cockblocked him. I’m starting to like this Zeke guy more and more.”

“Yes but no. We talked for a little bit more and then I told Eren he owed Armin and I an explanation. I was here until the 8th and I’d set him up. I didn’t give him a choice, actually.”

Ymir wrapped her arm around Mikasa’s shoulders tightly. “There’s the Mikasa I know and love! I mean, your angst is great for the album and you needed to heal so I didn’t say anything. But that’s...that’s the girl I met in high school. Take no shit Ackerman style!”

Mikasa could feel her cheeks turning red.

“So why were you at the graveyard?” Ymir removed her arm from Mikasa’s shoulders and sat down in Levi’s chair. She put her coffee cup down the coaster on the coffee table.

Mikasa wandered over to the couch and sat down.

“Visiting Mom and Dad and Carla. I visit them every New Year’s. Christmas….too many people. I like to talk to them.” She didn’t know why she felt embarrassed about it.

“That’s the look Armin gave you, that makes sense.”

“Yeah….”

“I haven’t gone and seen my mom since she died. Dad….longer than that.”

“Do you remember anything about them?”

“Not really.”

Ymir didn’t open up about her family very often. Mikasa never pushed for answers with her. She knew the basics. Ymir had been in foster care as a child, just like Annie had. Neither of them had any family step up to take care of them after their biological parents had passed. Annie was adopted by her first foster father while Ymir had moved around from place to place until she was sixteen. Then Ymir went through the emancipation process.

“Alright, let’s work on the new song you wrote,” Ymir said as she walked over into the sunroom.

Mikasa’s keyboard was still set up, music resting on it.

Mikasa pulled the piano bench from the grand piano over to the keyboard. She sat down, Ymir sat down next to her.

“Okay, so how is Historia going to hit this low note right here? The notes for the entire first verse are too low for her. Do you think she planned for this to be a duet?”

“I hope so because I wrote it as one. So the first verse is for you to sing. I wrote it from your perspective too. “

Ymir stared at Mikasa for a moment. “Wait, what? Do you not write all of these about Eren?”

“No, I write from my friend’s perspectives sometimes. You and Historia happened to be having problems so I wrote this as you and her. The first verse is you speaking to her.”

Mikasa began to play the introduction of the song.

“[lyrics redacted due to copyright],” Ymir’s voice rang out through the house.

Mikasa enjoyed the fact that Ymir had a lower voice similar to hers.

“Is that about the farmer or Reiner?” Ymir asked.

“Both. So you sing this whole first verse.”

“[lyrics redacted due to copyright],”

“Yeah, is that okay?” Mikasa just realized maybe her friends weren’t okay with her writing about them.

“It’s fucking brilliant,” Ymir reassured her. “What’s next?”

“This is the chorus but I thought for the first one, you’d sing it alone.”

“[lyrics redacted due to copyright].”

“So then there’s vocalization which I thought Annie could do. Then Historia would do the next verse and chorus. Then there’s a….”

BANG!

Someone was pounding hard on the front door.

“Who the hell is that?” Ymir asked as she went towards the window to see who was out there. “It’s Historia but there’s no limo, no car. How the hell she’d get here?”

Ymir threw the door open to a sobbing Historia.

Mikasa left the sun room as soon as she heard Historia’s sobs.

“It’s gone. It’s all gone. My money. My car...the recording contract. I’m so sorry.”

#mmtylif #my writing

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btsandvmin · 4 years ago

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I love your analyses , coz you're always puts everything so logically . Bdw what do you think of that famous jikook trip together ?? It's still intrigued me why Vmin always wants and say out loud that they want to travel together just Only two of them , and they even made a promise of that ,but then suddenly JM goes w JK (and they likes to talk about that trip a lot) , and i still can't get why Tae coudn't be there too and what stopped them to made their wishful promise ??

Thank you. I try at least… Though sometimes it really feels like I can’t make sense of anything. ^^’’

Anyway, about the ji/kook trip I don’t think the trip in itself is anything weird. I mean, Jimin went to Paris, Russia and Hawaii with friends last year. I am glad they get to travel and enjoy their free time (as long as people leave them alone).

As you say it’s more about how Vmin keep saying how they want to do things or makes promises (vlive) but nothing happens. Of course they could end up like that because of coincidence or because they prioritize something else. As for that time Tae also went to Japan but with his family (Tae was in Osaka, not Tokyo) so perhaps it just was that Tae already had plans with his family. And it’s not like BTS members go places together often unless for work, so it’s probably not a big deal to them. You can talk about wanting something but it never works out for various reasons.

At least we know Vmin do want to go somewhere together, and we know that when we see them in places like Bon Voyage they like sharing their experiences if they can. It’s possible they are more careful and private, or it just didn’t happen for other reasons. Or they might even have been somewhere but we don’t know about it.

I see why Ji/kookers see it as a big thing, I would too as a Vmin shipper if they did the same. But I also wouldn’t make it into proof for a romantic relationship, even though it definitely shows that Jimin and JK are close and love spending time together. But as I have mentioned before Vmin have spent time together and we don’t know about it because no ones saw them. Like them going to the Sapporo snow festival together, or to London Bridge from where Tae posted pictures but only alone.

I guess the biggest questionmark isn’t the trip in itself but rather the video JK made, the song he used and the fact that Big Hot posted it and that Ji/kook talked about the trip a lot. Jimin even tried to say he was the main model and said he and JK should go on a trip again so JK could film him. Personally I don’t know why two people hiding a relationship with a lot at stake would try to show it like this and more importantly get approval from their label to do so when Vmin couldn’t even sing a Christmas song together due to the lyrics. It’s not impossible it really means something, but to me it’s a bit weird if I compare with how Vmin act so careful. Ji/kook is for some reason favored by Big Hit (not talking about them being together backstage or privately) as they are often put together for photoshoots or various units. I mean, they even had the famous Unicorn shoot that was made to look romantic and was LGBT+ friendly, so maybe Big Hit is just supportive. But yeah, to me it seems a bit too much if they don’t want to get exposed. I would expect them and their label to be careful due to how bad it could end both personally and for their career as BTS.

Once again, if ji/kook is real then they don’t seem keen on hiding it. And if so it’s also possible their relationship might have had an impact on Vmin, like Tae trying to keep a distance. But again, there are many Vmin things I personally think look contradicting here, like them starting to hold hands more and more or how they chose to sleep together or be together a lot in BV4. Specifically because they had been apart for so long and Jimin directly went to Tae and cuddled up to him. If ji/kook can be so open, why does it often feel like Jimin does more weird things he doesn’t have to do with Tae? And why are Vmin careful? If they feel awkward because of ji/kook, why do anything at all they don’t want?

In the end I understand why it was a big deal for shippers, as I see the logic behind many ship theories or moments. But I always come back to Vmin’s behavior being more suspicious and “fitting” for a hidden romantic relationship. Just my personal take though, so of course I can be wrong, and that’s the whole point. There are people who believe 100% that Jin and Tae are a couple and write theories. It all depends on what you focus on and find the most likely, but in the end it’s just speculation.

Thanks for the ask, sorry for the late reply and sorry for once again speaking about other ships in a comparing way. BTS all love each other, that’s all that matters and something all shippers need to remember.

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sweetestrequiems · 5 years ago

Text

I: Meetings and Photos

Word Count: 3,025

A/N: Hello you lovely people of the Queendom on Tumblr. I’m Kit, and... well, you’ve seen me around enough. I wrote Silence is Never Better, The Tower of London, and maybe a few other things you might have seen around. Anyways... Welcome to the first chapter of Out of a Book! I’m very excited to share this with you all. I truly hope with heart and soul that you all enjoy this. If you ever want to leave any feedback, feel free to message me, or contact me at one of these profiles:

Instagram: @/Reinapuff Twitter: @/Reinapuff

If you’d like to be added to the tag list, let me know! I’m always happy to share my work with others!

––––––––––

A rather early Thursday morning in the city of Syracuse, New York. The time’s about 7:15 in the morning.

The sun was over the horizon, but there was little to no noise inside of the apartment. The birds sang their graces and none of this seemed to be the thing to wake up the sleeping woman. In fact, a little snore escaped from her while she slept. Had her roommate not needed to go to work, she would've turned that against the woman in a heartbeat. But of course, this was not out of malice; the two would see the situation being out of fun. Getting up this early in the morning, however, never came easy for the woman that was still in bed. There were two things able to get her to wake up: the sun hitting her eyes, or an alarm of sorts, whether from a phone or a clock.

On this Thursday morning? It was both of those things that would wake her up.

An aggravated Catherine Parr turned to face away from the sunlight, and to reach for her phone. Forcing herself to sit up to turn the alarm off, Parr set the phone down before stretching her arms up and yawning. She noticed the quiet of the apartment about a few minutes from initially waking up. This meant that she was half asleep for a good little bit. “Ah, Lina went to work. Right, I almost forget she’s a teacher sometimes,” she finishes her sentence with a hum. Catalina Aragón, someone she affectionately called Lina, or even just Aragon. She found it fun to have a Spanish roommate, if she was being honest with herself. Made for a more entertaining time some days.

Parr’s never-resting mind began to try to think as to why she had set an alarm so early in the morning. Was it due to the fact she kept waking up too late? Was it a meeting with her publicist? The woman, for the life of her, could not remember. A hand came up to her forehead, rubbing it a few times before pinching the bridge of her nose. “This is bollocks. I can’t remember why I set my alarms so early,” a groan of frustration comes out under her breath. If she hadn’t turned her alarm off so quickly, she might’ve read the reminder that she had put for it. That didn’t matter much. It would come back to smack her in the face later.

Letting her legs swing over the edge of the bed, Parr pushed herself up and on her feet she landed.

––––––––––

7:45 am.

For Catherine to admit she was ready for the day, she needed one thing, and that one thing was in her hands as she walked back to the small table. Sitting down, the ceramic mug came up to her lips. Coffee. That was the one thing she needed. Her shoulders came up for a moment before they eased up, a smile helping her expression soften up from grumpy-seeming to amused. Opening up her laptop, Catherine softly hummed. A buzz makes her gaze shift from the laptop screen to her phone’s screen, seeing the notification on it. Tapping on it, she allows her phone to open up the email.

From: Cleves, Anna To: Parr, Catherine Subject: Planning for next release

Parr,

Writing a short email to remind you about our 8:00 am meeting for the first steps of getting the announcement of your upcoming book release. If you have any ideas post-conference, be sure to write them down and send me an email with them. We can further discuss those at a later date.

Anna Cleves Media Agent/Public Relations

Bringing her free hand up to her mouth, Catherine Parr forced herself to swallow the mouthful of coffee and then hissed under her breath. “That’s today?! It’s 7:55, I have barely any time to get ready!” Gold star for Cathy Parr. Standing up, the author gave a sigh and quickly disappeared off to the space that was her room in the apartment to at least make herself presentable from the torso up. It did not matter that she was wearing black joggers, so long as she looked like she was ready for a business meeting.

Adjusting her curls so they wouldn’t fall over her face, Catherine paced over to the chair, and sat back down. Now that she had her headset on, and got ready in the nick of time, she patiently waited for the call. There it was. Taking a brief moment to look at herself and adjust her blouse, she answers. “Good morning, Anna.”

“Good morning to you too, Cathy. Glad to see you’re awake at an early time. And you got all dressed up, too! You didn’t have to,” a chuckle. Cleves ran a hand through her hair and gave a smile. “So, we’re looking at what kind of a timeline for the release, exactly?” A slight roll of the eyes, and a shake of the head. “Would’ve been nice to know before I spent the last five minutes panicking over being dressed decently. Anyways, to the main topic. My editor is getting ready to give me the list of revisions made to the draft and then I’m going to once again, go in and edit whatever needs to be changed per her advice. We’re... aiming for maybe... three to six months from now.”

A nod from Anna. Catherine could see the woman looking at a second screen and typing something. Probably notes about all of this. This conversation carried on past 8:30, until it was Anna herself who decided to conclude it. “Sounds wonderful. I’ll be in touch, as per usual. But now that this is over, we can talk about something else, if you’d like.” Although they saw each other maybe once or twice a month in person, Anna and Catherine were quite the close friends–– about as close as Catherine and Catalina, since the two have been roommates since their university days. “Look, I woke up this morning thinking I had nothing to do, and I was just going to text Lina for the grocery list but then your email popped up,” a laugh. The German woman simply shook her head.

“So you got dressed up in a panic, Cathy? I’m shocked.” There was another bout of laughter that interrupted them. Parr found herself nodding. “Of course I did. I’m not going to just answer a conference call from you in a crop top and joggers, and with a messy bun.” The thought of Parr actually having a messy bun made Cleves laugh. “You and messy buns? You’ve got to be kidding me. But good job admitting you’re still halfway in your pajamas.”

Now she rolled her eyes. She rolled them so hard, they could've rolled right off her face.

Catherine shook her head, not being able to help the smile. “Hush. As if you weren't in your own. You’re at home, I know you are!” Her hands went to grab the cup of coffee, and she brought it back up to her lips. She was a bit proud of herself for not having touched it the whole time during the meeting, but now she was craving it. So, she began to drink it, allowing Anna to talk. “Where’s Lina? I’m surprised the woman isn’t around there. Wait, no... never mind, don’t answer that. She’s at work, isn’t she?” A nod. “Yeah, she’s a teacher, Anna. She leaves early. Comes back by dinner time normally.”

It was a safe assumption to say the two were having a fairly good time speaking to each other.

––––––––––

11:11 am.

“Perfect. That’s the shot,” a southern English voice rang out in the studio apartment. That was the voice of the beauty that took the world by storm: Anne Boleyn. “Tu as un bon oeil avec une caméra, Maggie! Ça a l'air super, vraiment. Go on and head on home, you’re good to go. Have fun with the pictures,” the ruby-lipped woman gave a kiss on both cheeks to her photographer friend, who packed up soon after and headed on out. Sitting down on the loveseat, Boleyn ended up getting herself to lay down and hold her phone right above her face.

“Lame.” She scrolls past one post.

“Seen it.” Another.

“What’s this?” A new post from her favorite author. She’d never admit it, but deep down inside, she was a huge nerd. Anne skimmed over the post, her thumb double tapping the screen. Parr’s posts were always inspirational quotes, or some snippets from her works. This one was just an appreciation post. A smile began to form, with it eventually becoming a light laugh. “She’s so kind! It’s amazing how someone so famous has a golden heart. And I’m sure she knows she’s got the fame.”

Most of the remainder of the morning for Anne was spent laying down, on Instagram, with no care in the world. Truly, the woman was one of a rather mellow personality. And in her spare time, she loved a good book. Deciding she’d had enough of Instagram for the time being, she closed out of the app and opened up another one. Probably delivery or something, considering it was approaching the afternoon and she felt her stomach rumble just a little. “Good thing I decided to get food. Has it really been almost five hours since I ate?”

An early riser, she was. On most days, Boleyn woke herself up at around three in the morning to go work out from maybe 3:30 to 4:45 in the morning. Sometimes she’d extend that work out to 5:45 in the morning. Then it was off to come back home, shower and get comfortable to be in the kitchen and cooking food for herself by around the 6:45 mark. She was always eating by seven in the morning, if not ten minutes later. But she was feeling particularly lazy today, so she’d take advantage of the day to just lounge around.

Standing up, Anne left her phone face down on the loveseat. She didn’t need it to get comfortable. And to be fair, it took her maybe about ten minutes, because the majority of it was her washing her face and making sure to take good care of that. She did however, come out of her bedroom with her glasses on. Now that she was alone for the day, she could just be Anne. No contacts, no sunglasses. Just plain Anne Boleyn. She was a huge nerd growing up, and she knew this to be quite true. She loved herself, and she truly did love her modeling career, but she found it odd to be both a nerd and a super famous model at the same time.

So, she’d keep her personal life to herself. Just like that.

––––––––––

1:00 pm.

Having finished her lunch around fifteen minutes ago, and having cleaned everything up, Anne found herself at a crossroads during the day. She could take her glasses off, grab a blanket, and take a nice nap. She could go out to the local shops and peruse their inventories. She could get into the kitchen, and do some meal prepping. She had options, but she just couldn’t quite put her finger on what she wanted to do. Shrugging it off, the woman reached for the bookshelf. One of Parr’s books was in her hands.

Anne couldn’t quite tell what drew her into Catherine’s writings. Her books were not quite memoirs, but not quite fully opinionated pieces either. However, they did fall into the non-fiction category. Think of it as a discourse, kind of–– but one full of opinion, experience, and even proven fact. She was a strong woman, and had morals. Anne Boleyn was drawn to that from the first day she picked up a book by Catherine Parr. Laying back down on the loveseat, she opened up the book with a smile.

“A well deserved following,” she’d softly mutter. Her smile became less and less of one until her face was deadpan; a sign she was focused on reading. Word by word and page by page. Killer looks in front of the camera and the world, but a calm and soft appearance in private. This was something Anne showed maybe once or twice, since she has occasionally posted on her Instagram stories a picture or a video with her in her glasses.

One page became another as the time passed. Page to page, eventually book to book. Anne was in one of her reading holes, humming to herself to add a little more entertainment to her already uplifted mood. What broke her out of the daze was her phone ringing. A phone call. Pulling the phone out from underneath her, Anne answered after reading the caller ID. Maggie. Probably an update about the pictures or something.

“Anne! Bonne nouvelle, mon ami! I’ll have these edited by tonight or tomorrow at best. You’ll be right back on a runway soon enough with these,” Maggie sounded excited. A smile came across Anne’s lips. “Besides, you now have an updated picture for events instead of having to use the one from three years ago! Isn’t that great?” Sitting up, Boleyn set the book down and nodded to herself. “Oui. Merci à vous, comme d'habitude, Maggie. You work miracles,” she chuckles. “We’ll talk later. I might just take a nap or binge some Netflix.”

The conversation carried on for maybe five more minutes before Maggie hung up. Quite literally Anne’s best friend from childhood. Put the two together nowadays, and if Maggie had her camera or Anne’s phone in her hand, it was a photoshoot wherever they went. Safe to say that Maggie was responsible for the solid 90% of Anne’s feed that wasn’t selfies and food posts. Count your blessings, they always say. And despite the overwhelming following, Boleyn truly was grateful for what she had. Every single bit of fame that came her way? She was thankful she managed to get that far.

––––––––––

6:30 pm.

“Cathy? Estoy aquí y traje comida!”

Catalina had shut the door to the apartment as she finished that statement. Catherine peeked from behind the wall, before stepping out into view and smiling. “How was work, Lina?” Setting the food down on the table, one could see Catalina’s eyes roll to the back of her head for a moment. Looks like she had a troublesome day, considering she wasn't too cheery coming in the door. “Don’t get me started on it, Cathy. They were so unruly today for no reason. Part of me wonders if it’s the fact that they’re teenagers or not, but... it was unreal. The few that sit by my desk in the back of the classroom? They kept their cool, and I was glad about that.”

Catalina and Catherine both opened up their respective take out containers.

“Pero, gran y poderoso Señor... it was a nightmare today.”

A snicker came from Parr. “That’s why I don’t teach English. Could you imagine it? I’d be being told I’m spelling stuff like colour and favourite, or honour wrong! I’m English, we spell it differently than the Americans!” That snicker became a laugh. Catalina couldn’t help but laugh herself. “But truly, I’m so sorry you had to deal with a rowdy bunch today. Maybe they will be more mellow tomorrow. One day is just one day, and you have had one bad day... what... once every few months normally?”

“Yeah, it does happen every few months. So, I guess I won’t worry too much.” Catalina just shrugged it off, stuffing a spoonful of rice into her mouth.

––––––––––

A bite of chicken found itself on Anne’s fork. She was staring at her food, debating whether she should, or should not, post the dinner she so graciously decided to make. One could see the questioning glimmer in her eyes. The voice across the room made her attention snap from the plate to the source of the voice. “Je sais que c'est joli, mais allez, Anne. You haven’t touched your own food!” A bit of a laugh from Maggie. “I know, I know. Look, I just... wonder sometimes, if there’s anything else I can add to it. I always do that after I finish something.”

“I can tell. Just like when we were kids. You ALWAYS wanted to experiment more with your food. It’s almost like you live to be chaos.”

“Well, I mean... have you seen how I look? I’m chaos disguised as a babe. I like to think I’m pretty fit, after all,” there was the laugh from Boleyn. Shrugging it off, she just started to eat. Maggie was the one to continue the conversation. “Speaking of things you like, Anne... has that favorite author of yours posted anything? You always had a bit of a love for books. I saw that appreciation post earlier, and thought that was sweet. Even with the fame she has to her name, she remains humble. D’you know what, Anne? It reminds me of you a little.”

“How so?”

“Because you are the exact same way! Even with this huge following, you... you take the time to reach out and say thank you! You’re quite humble, despite what your looks say about you. I guess that whole don’t judge a book by its cover thing is real. Also, how do you just know how to make chicken taste good? This is amazing! I’m surprised you didn't go to culinary school,” Maggie practically shoved her food into her mouth, knowing that it would make Anne Boleyn laugh.

––––––––––

At the end of the night, both women could be found doing the exact same thing before they made themselves fall asleep:

Scrolling through their social media pages. One admiring the other’s confidence, and one admiring the other’s intelligence. A fair trade off to it all.

And despite the surprisingly good chaos from earlier on in the day, Anne Boleyn and Catherine Parr both could agree on one thing:

That there would be one day that their paths cross.

#Out of a Book #Catherine Parr #Anne Boleyn #six the musical #six the musical fanfiction #six the musical fanfic #Parrlyn #six ff #six fanfiction

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infriga · 5 years ago

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Monkey D Luffy!

Sexuality Headcanon: Luffy is ace/aro as FUCK. Asexual icon.

Gender Headcanon: Luffy identifies as a guy and he definitely cares about being manly, but his ideas of being manly seem to be based less on him wanting to be a man and more on him just liking manly things because he thinks they’re cool. Aside from that he’s completely gender blind so I doubt he thinks or cares about it much.

A ship I have with said character: What ship DON’T I have with Luffy. He’s the kind of character who can be shipped with basically anyone because he has chemistry with most people. My favourite are probably SanLu, ZoLu, and KataLu, though I’m also fond of LawLu.

A BROTP I have with said character: My top ships are also my top Brotps, but I also love his friendship with Bon-chan, and his relationship with Tama is also really cute.

A NOTP I have with said character: Tama, his grandpa, Dadan, uh, there are so many characters in One Piece god, probably the really shitty villains like Spandam or St Charles because they don’t deserve him. I prefer his brothers as a brotherly relationship. Blackbeard. Oh Akainu for sure, Akainu doesn’t deserve to be loved at all. Most of the other characters are fair game tho.

A random headcanon: Luffy is secretly instinctively good at math but has a hard time articulating it out loud so most people don’t realize it. His culverin attacks in G4, especially as Snakeman, basically require a hefty calculating ability with angles and stuff to be as accurate as they are, and he was able to determine how many meals he missed in an instant when he woke up in Alabasta so canon supports this. He’s really good at judging distances and stuff in general too so it fits in my opinion. But he’s so dense most of the time about other stuff that no one would suspect it.

General Opinion over said character: I think Luffy is a more complex and interesting character than most people give him credit for. A lot of people mistake being a simple person with being a simple character, but there’s a reason why it’s so hard to get a good handle on his characterization when writing him. Part of it is that Oda almost never shows Luffy’s thought process, which leaves a lot of his actions up for interpretation. It also means we can’t really delve into how he thinks like we could for other main characters who tend to do a lot of thinking that the audience can see. Luffy does do a lot of thinking himself, but we don’t get to see it, we just get to see him pondering something before making a decision. He often seems to come to a quick conclusions which makes people think he doesn’t take much time to think, but too many of his decisions had to have been thought through beforehand so that means he does often put a lot of thought in to plenty of his decisions, even if it doesn’t seem like it. He's definitely a quick thinker, but he does think.

One arc that really showcases how Luffy isn’t just a singleminded idiot is Water 7. We get his reaction to finding out that Merry can’t be fixed, where he insists that they won’t ever leave someone behind, that they refuse to accept that her journey with them is over, but then the shipwrights counter that by telling him that he basically has to choose between the ship and his crew, because they won’t be making it to the next island if they keep sailing on Merry. And this obviously hit him hard. Later when we end up in the cabin with Usopp, Luffy has decided to buy a new ship. Usually Luffy makes choices based on what he wants, and does whatever he can to do it no matter the obstacle, but here he’s taking his role as captain seriously, and instead making a decision for the good of the crew, whether he wants it or not. This is where it gets really interesting to me. We the audience know he’s just as upset about leaving Merry behind as Usopp, but Usopp has been through a lot of shit in Water 7, and is blaming himself for losing the money they were going to use to repair Merry, so Luffy tries to put on a happy face to keep Usopp from feeling bad. This is very out of character behaviour for Luffy clearly, he’s never been the type to hide how he feels, but the decision itself makes sense in context. He’s not acting based on how he feels, he’s acting based on what he thinks is best for his crew. That moment, where he masks how he feels because he’s trying to do what’s right as captain based on what he thinks will help the crew and Usopp, is reflected again at the end of the post-Enies Lobby arc, when he wants so badly to let Usopp back on the ship, but he knows he can’t until Usopp apologizes, because he realizes that Zoro was right, crewmembers can’t be allowed to leave and rejoin the crew so easily without consequence if they show a lack of respect for Luffy’s decisions. So he stands there and sweats and is so obviously unhappy about it, but he waits anyways. These sorts of moments are the ones where I want to point at him and say “there’s more to him than just meat and punching things!” We see another good moment at the end of the WCI arc, when Jinbe asks Luffy to go on without him so he can stay and help his former crew. Luffy absolutely doesn’t want to leave Jinbe behind. They finally just got him to join their crew, they just spent the whole arc trying to rescue another crew member, and they’ve had friends die for that cause. The last thing they want to do is abandon Jinbe, leaving a crewmate behind is one of the things he would never be willing to do, but Luffy has to make a choice. He could order Jinbe not to go, but he respects Jinbe, and he doesn’t want to take that choice from him. Jinbe’s former crew is like family to him. But they can’t stay and help Jinbe either, because after everything they went through to get Sanji back it would be an insult to stay when the fishmen are putting themselves at risk to give the Strawhats a chance to escape. The best thing he can do is give Jinbe the order to survive and return. “Even if you die, don’t die.” aka “Don’t let even death stop you from coming back to us.” He tells Jinbe with all the authority of a true king that he is Jinbe’s captain now, and Jinbe is bound to obey his orders. There are so many other scenes I could point to for this topic but these ones are some of my favourites and if I went over all of them this would probably get way too long.

Yeah, basically it bothers me when people say Luffy doesn’t have any complexity as a character, he absolutely does, you just have to look for it. He’s not giving up all his intricacies easily, you have to work for them. I could talk all day about this topic but I’ll stop here for now lol.

#One Piece #Monkey D. Luffy #me going on a long tangent about something One Piece related? Who could have predicted such a thing #reply #ask meme #Anonymous #Luffy is a perfect example of how my sexuality headcanons have no bearing on which ships I like lmao #Like you can pry ace/aro Luffy out of my cold dead hands #but here just let me add one more character to Luffy's enourmous harem because they conversed once or twice and I just think it's neat #sp

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lalainajanes · 5 years ago

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I teased this one ages ago! Sorry, rl got in the way! Do me a favor and cross your fingers that my bosses agree to start letting ups work from home a couple days a week next year bc that will make my life waaaayyy easier.

You’re Better Than Normal (Part Two)

Part One

Caroline shifts from sleep to wakefulness violently, with a jerk and a gasp. She can’t trust the fuzzy place between the two.

She’s yet to manage a decent stretch of rest. She dreams of walls that shift closer and closer no matter how hard she tries to force them back. Of Bonnie fading and weakening when no rescue comes. Of Bonnie hanging in there until Caroline gets so thirsty.

Those are the worst.

She fights her way out of the nightmares and her body reacts accordingly. Each time she wakes she’s rigid, ready to use every ounce of her strength to get free.

Klaus is always there to remind her that she is.

This time her palms slam into his chest when she tries to spring to her feet. She snaps into lucidity when his body gives in a way the ground wouldn’t. He inhales sharply but makes no other noise of shock or pain, just grabs her wrists firmly. “Caroline, wake up.”

Caroline’s eyes pop open, only to close quickly when the light stings. She relaxes as the memories – of the last few hours, of yesterday - flood her. She inhales deeply in relief before she slumps back down. There’s a lamp on the bedside table, the shade off so it’s as bright as possible. “Ouch,” she grumbles, tucking her forehead against Klaus’ chest.

He laughs and his hands glide up her arms, his thumbs rubbing circles against her stiff shoulders. “You seemed not to appreciate the lack of light the last, oh, half-dozen times you woke.”

She’d been so sure she was back in the cave when she’d found herself in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by unbroken darkness. Her throat had tightened, her breathing growing ragged and painful. Klaus had asked what was wrong and parsed the issue from her frantic gestures and garbled words.

He’d left the bed long enough to solve the problem, had brushed off her weak protests that he wouldn’t be able to sleep. He’d said he’s gone weeks without sleeping while on the run, without slowing or resting, so he wouldn’t even notice a few nights spent awake in the comfort of a bed.

When it had been silence that made her uneasy, he’d talked. About what Caroline’s not quite sure because the words had mattered less than his voice.

She’d grown used to noise while she slept in various hostels and hotels in Europe. People shifting across the room or through too thin walls, city noise streaming in through open windows. Birds chirping and trees rustling the few times they’d ventured somewhere more rustic.

The cave had been quiet.

“Sorry,” Caroline says, not for the first time. “For, well, you know.”

Keeping him up, invading his bed, being so freaking needy. It’s an ever-lengthening list.

She bites back a moan when he digs into a particularly tight knot near her spine. “Stop apologizing,” Klaus chides.

Again.

The first ‘I’m sorry’ she’d muttered had been mortified. They’d moved to a bed but she hadn’t allowed Klaus even a fraction of an inch of personal space. Each time she barrels into alertness she’s half on top of him. Her hands are always on his skin, gripping too tightly.

He’s yet to complain.

She sighs, turns her head to rest her ear against his heart. “It must be almost morning.”

“Nearly.” He doesn’t seem particularly eager to start his day.

“Bonnie’s still asleep?”

“Yes. We’ll know when she stirs,” Klaus promises. Elijah’s with her, he’d explained. That there were plenty of other vampires he could have posted but Elijah had offered, reasoning it was best that someone familiar attend to Bon.

“How long has it been now?”

“About fourteen hours.”

So an hour longer than when she’d last asked. She’s kind of impressed that Klaus doesn’t sound more annoyed. “I’m…”

This time Klaus doesn’t allow the apology. “Worried about your oldest friend, I know. If she’s not up in another few hours I’ll send someone to fetch a doctor.”

“Have house calls made a comeback in the twenty…” Caroline pauses abruptly, lets the joke die. She doesn’t even know what century it is.

“Second,” Klaus tells her softly, his palm flattening on her back like he’s braced for her to rear away.

Caroline doesn’t move much, lets the news sink in. Honestly, she’s kind of relieved. She’s had no real way to guess – Klaus and his siblings will look the same if a hundred or a thousand years had passed. “Are we talking early twenty-second century?”

Hey, she’s always been an optimist.

“Mid,” Klaus says, a touch regretfully. “Just on the cusp of late, mathematically speaking.”

That startles a choked noise of amusement from Caroline. She taps his chest lightly, “Nerd.”

Klaus doesn’t react much to the teasing but then he’s definitely been called worse. “Do you want a specific date? Or would you prefer to ease into it a bit?”

Caroline takes a deep breath, then another. She’d told herself she’d face her problems head on in the morning. It’s time to stop procrastinating. “No, let’s get it over with. How long did I spend molding in a cave, Klaus?”

She shivers involuntarily, remembering just how long it had taken for the water in the shower to run clean.

His hand starts to move, gliding up and down the length of her back. It’s an attempt at comfort that she wouldn’t have thought Klaus capable of, once upon a time. “One hundred and forty-seven years.”

She’s always been a fan of numbers. In goals that could be measured. Timelines. When Klaus gives her the number – the length of time she’s been gone – her brain whirls, trying to quantify it.

One hundred and forty-seven years equals two human lifetimes, almost. It’s roughly ten percent of Klaus’ very long life. Almost eight times as many years as she’d lived. Caroline can’t decide whether she should laugh or cry or scream.

“And a few months, I believe,” Klaus adds softly.

A few months doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things but Caroline does appreciate precision. It had been the very beginning of spring when they’d returned to Mystic Falls. After a winter in Greece neither she nor Bonnie had been happy to find their hometown chilly and damp. “What’s the date?”

“September 30th. Twenty-one-sixty-four.”

“Huh. Just in time for my…” Caroline thinks for a minute, “…172nd birthday.” She’s technically older than Stefan had been when they’d met. Damon too, she’s pretty sure.

“I know,” Klaus murmurs. “I’ll have to scrounge you up a gift.”

Caroline lifts her head, glad he’s given her an opening to quit obsessing over a length of time she truly can’t even fathom. She glares at him playfully, “You’ll scrounge? You, a birthday enthusiast, will scrounge for a gift for the first birthday I’ve been aware of in a century and a half?”

He smiles at her and shifts so he’s propped against the bed’s padded headboard, easily moving Caroline with him. She stretches out her legs, wonders if she should move. Discards the idea when Klaus’ fingers sink into her hair. He matches her feigned outrage with a taunt, “I know you love surprises so I wouldn’t want to spoil anything. I may have a suitable item or two laying around.”

Hmm. Would it be rude to snoop? Probably. Is she going to do it anyway? Of course. Hopefully cake is still a thing in the twenty-second century.

“I hate surprises.”

She feels his amusement this time, rumbling through his chest under her head. “I’m well aware, love.” Klaus rubs at the base of her skull and Caroline finds her eyes drooping, unable to form a clever comeback. She knows she won’t sleep properly but a few more minutes of rest might be a good idea.

She wants to be sharp when Klaus’ guests arrive.

* * * * *

Caroline paces, waiting for Bonnie to wake. It's been at nearly eighteen hours and Caroline’s worry is mounting. Bonnie seems okay – she’s not too hot or too cold, doesn’t look like she’s in any pain or distress. She looks like she’s just sleeping well.

Kol’s insisting that’s exactly what’s happening, that it’s normal for witches to need to rest after big spells to recharge. He’s made the proclamation at breakfast, while double fisting blood and bourbon, in the most man-splain-y way possible, and Caroline’s temper had flared.

"Bonnie is not a freaking battery!" She’d snapped, her hands hitting the table hard enough to send cutlery rattling. Kol had leaned forward, his lips twisted condescendingly. Whatever he’d been about to say had been cut off by the warning look Klaus had leveled his way. It had promised retribution and so Kol had refrained from snapping back.

Or snapping Caroline’s neck.

She'd left the breakfast table (and it's weird, unidentifiable, array of food-like things) in a huff. After a few wrong turns she’d found her way to the room they'd deposited Bonnie in last night. She'd been soothed by Bonnie's strong heartbeat, by the steady rhythm of her breaths. She'd relaxed enough to accept the glass of blood Rebekah had dropped off, had even remembered her manners and muttered a thanks.

Rebekah had left quickly, telling Caroline to yell if she was too dim to remember how to work the shower, leaving the door ajar.

She'd downed the blood quickly and rinsed the glass (managing just fine, Rebekah). Bonnie’s a little uneasy about the whole blood drinking vampire thing. Better than she had been but, when they’d been travelling together, Caroline had gotten into the habit of hiding her meals as much as possible.

Unable to sit still any longer, nervous energy thrumming through her body, she'd started to move.

It takes fourteen strides, from wall to wall, and she's never been more grateful for Klaus' penchant for opulence. She's making lists in her head. There’s so much she’ll need to know, a million things she'll have to do. Like, how's she going to go about getting a driver's license? Do people still have those? Or is there a retinal scan, or some creepy microchip implanted in your body? Caroline had never been much for sci fi movies, something she deeply regrets now that her life has become one.

She's got her ears focused on Bonnie, however, recognizes the little annoyed noise Bonnie always makes when she's about to wake up. Caroline's in the chair beside the bed in under a second, legs pulled up under her, trying to look casual and like she's not freaking out.

The attempt is pointless, Bonnie's known her forever, and it only takes a second before her green eyes sharpen and focus on Caroline. "How bad is it?" Bonnie asks, resigned because she’s way too accustomed to doom and gloom.

They’d been doing so well on their own. They’d been away for months without even the tiniest threat of danger.

Caroline chews on the inside of her lip for a second, considering how to answer. She can't lie, won't lie, but a little stalling might be a kindness. Just until Bonnie has a chance to shower and eat. "Honestly? It's not great, Bon. But we're alive. We’ve got… help.” She’d almost said friends but that would have been pushing it.

Bonnie closes her eyes again, “This bed is an improvement over the cave.”

“That’s the spirit. I felt a bajillion times better after a shower.”

When Bonnie sits up and kicks the blankets aside, the sheets are no longer white. She makes a disgusted face at the grit and grime covering her body, "Gross. I can't believe I fell asleep like this."

"You were right out," Caroline tells her. "Rebekah tucked you in and you didn't even notice."

"Weird. I wish you hadn't told me that."

Caroline cracks a smile at the mildly disgusted look Bonnie wears, "Don't worry. I have it on good authority that Nice Rebekah will be a fleeting presence. We'll probably miss her once Bitch Rebekah rears her ugly head."

"I heard that!" Rebekah bellows from several rooms away.

Caroline looks away, from Bonnie. She'll start giggling if she doesn't and that will likely not endear either of them to Rebekah.

Caroline’s stronger than she had been but Damon will be too. If things get violent, well, she wants all The Originals on her side.

Once she's swallowed down her laughter she stands, brushing her hands together, "You'll have to bear with me. Everything in the bathroom is crazy fancy and I've only been in it once. I'm pretty sure there's no boil humans alive setting though."

"Are you sure?" Bonnie asks dryly. "You're aware of just who lives here? Might be something they do for fun."

Klaus, with his impeccable timing, chooses that moment to poke his head in the door, "Now why would we overcook a perfectly good meal?"

Bonnie glares, dark and deadly, and Caroline hastily steps into her line of sight, in case she starts throwing magic around. "He's joking, Bon. Klaus just doesn't realize that he's not actually funny."

She shoots him her own quelling look, more exasperated than upset, and he merely smirks back, leaning against the open doorway. "Nonsense, my sense of humor is delightful, everyone says so."

"People you're attempting to kill, I'm guessing? I think that counts as duress and you should assume they're lying."

Klaus places a hand over his heart, his face dropping into an exaggeratedly wounded expression. Caroline rolls her eyes, "Did you need something?"

He turns serious in an instant, "Yes, actually. Our guests will be arriving within the hour." Klaus' eyes flit over to Bonnie, and Caroline glances over to find her friend looking puzzled at Klaus' words. She’s not going to start explaining with Klaus in the room. There are things Bonnie needs to hear from Caroline. Privately. "I'll let you know when I'm ready to see them," she says.

He nods in acceptance, rocks back a step, before turning to leave. A thought occurs to Caroline, one she's kind of ashamed is just now popping up. "One sec, Bon," she says, before darting out the room after Klaus. He turns, a brow raised, and she invades his personal space to speak quietly.

It’s weird she even notices considering how she’d spent last night draped all over him.

"Bonnie's mom was a vampire. Can you find out what happened to her? If she's still around?"

"I can," Klaus says. "I even have a reasonably good idea of where to start looking."

"Good. Thank you. Can you let Enzo know what I'm doing? I'll find him as soon as I can."

"And our other guests?" Klaus asks mildly. "Any specifications for how I treat them?"

She knows what he's asking, wonders what it says about her that her first instinct is to ask for a little bloodshed, Damon's in particular. "Are their memories still gone?"

"Yes. It was a clever spell. Your little witch friend is the only person who can break it."

Caroline's not surprised. Of course Damon would craft the tiniest loophole possible. "Then I think they should be comfortable."

“Such generosity.”

“Comfortable for now.” Until their memories have returned, and they’ve confessed to the exact series of events that had led to Caroline and Bonnie losing so many years.

Klaus' eyes gleam, a slow, pleased smile tugging at his lips, "I’ve always enjoyed the way your mind works."

She remembers, had always found it flattering, his intrigue with her brain when so many had only seen a pretty face or attractive body. What does it mean that it's endured?

Klaus tips his head, gestures to the room behind her, "You'd best return, it sounds like someone's getting impatient."

She can hear Bonnie moving around, now that he mentions it, "Right. I should," Still Caroline hesitates. She wants to say thank you, again, but she feels like she's already said it so many times. Knows she'll probably need to say it more, over the coming days and weeks.

"I'll send someone with a tray of food, in a bit. And you may find me, if you need anything."

"Klaus…" Caroline murmurs, trailing off helplessly. She can't find the words but she's always been good at actions. Before she can second guess herself, she puts her hand on his shoulder, rises and brushes her lips over his cheek. He stiffens, and his eyes are slightly wider when she pulls back, trained on her face. She feels a momentary surge of satisfaction at having caught him off guard.

Surely not many can claim the same.

Caroline lets her hand slide down his arm, before she steps back. Throws him on last smile, before she turns on her heel.

Klaus, and all the things between them, will keep. He's proven that. Right now, Bonnie needs her more.

* * * * *

“What? That’s insane. Impossible. She can’t be a vampire. She took the cure. Katherine tried to turn back, remember?”

Bonnie’s restless, crackling with energy. She’s pacing the room, just as Caroline had earlier. They’ve thrown all the curtains in but there’s not a whole lot of natural light to be found. Clouds pack the sky, sitting low and heavy, like a storm threatens. They hadn’t been able to figure out how to open the windows but at least the room is big and well lit.

They’re avoiding the view. Caroline vaguely recognizes the back grounds of Klaus’ Mystic Falls home but it looks way different. Once carefully manicured it’s now little more than a few scraggly patches of brown-yellow grass dotted over rocks and cracked soil. The outbuildings are crumbling and weather beaten and the stone paths that had once wound around the house no longer visible.

Caroline’s doing her best to project calm. So not her forte but she’s had a good chunk of time to process. Someone to lean on (in the most literal sense of the word) and answer her questions. “Bon, you’re a witch. Once upon a time we thought that was impossible.”

Bonnie’s head swivels to shoot Caroline an annoyed look. Caroline’s sitting cross legged at the end of the bed and she tips her head to the side and maintains eye contact until Bonnie huffs out an irritated sigh and resumes walking. “Fine, I will give you that one.”

“Why thank you.”

“She wouldn’t though. Elena never wanted to be a vampire.”

That’s kind of a sticking point for Caroline too. Klaus hadn’t known how or why Elena had turned but he’d had theories. Caroline goes with the most generous, “Maybe it was life or death again. She chose to be a vampire rather than die the first time. If she had to choose again...”

“She wouldn’t sacrifice us though. That’s not Elena.”

Caroline’s not so sure.

Elena had chosen sleep knowing that the future she wanted was on pause. That Damon would be waiting for her, and Stefan would remain unchanged. That she could have everything her little heart desired when she woke up and that she wouldn’t even suffer the agony of waiting. If something threatened that future? Caroline doesn’t trust that Elena’s selflessness would have held.

She’d let go of the things Elena had said and done with her humanity off, had known that holding on to her anger was pointless when Elena hadn’t even been willing to entertain the idea of an apology. She’d rationalized that it wasn’t really Elena. Then she’d flipped her own switch and she’d been entirely herself. The worst parts of herself that she’d tried to temper, yes, but she’s not going to deny they exist. She’s ruthless and blunt, and capable of terrible things in pursuit of her goals.

Some might label those traits as flaws but privately Caroline thinks they can be strengths too.

Elena had always been selective about the flaws she was willing to overlook, a teeny bit in denial about the ones she possessed.

Damon and Stefan were gifted limitless chances. Other people not so much.

Sometime after Damon and Stefan had shown up Elena’s universe had narrowed. Caroline had been aware of just who existed at the center of it. If Damon was the sun and Stefan the moon, destined to be stuck to Elena’s side, Caroline had figured she and Bonnie were planets. Their orbits would grow bigger, away from Mystic Falls, but that they’d still be important. They’d keep track of each other, share milestones, celebrate success and band together in tragedy.

That may have been too rosy a view. Maybe, to Elena, she’s Pluto. Easily demoted.

“She’s here, according to Klaus. Damon and Stefan too. That wouldn’t be possible if she hadn’t turned.”

Bonnie pauses, her head snapping up and her eyes narrowing in suspicion. “Are they the guests Klaus was talking about? He sounded extra smarmy.”

“Yup. Their memories are all messed up. Klaus thinks you’re the only witch on the planet with a fix.”

“Klaus thinks,” Bonnie repeats and there’s a whole heap of distaste in those two little words.

Oh boy.

“I know you don’t like him,” Caroline begins.

“That’s understating it a bit.”

Caroline decides it’s prudent to ignore the interruption. “Or trust him. And you don’t have to. But maybe give him some credit for springing us yesterday.” Caroline’s not sure she would have been able to do it on her own. She’s definitely sure that she wouldn’t have been fast enough for Bonnie to make it out with no ill effects.

“Yeah, about that. He says it’s been a hundred and forty seven years, how did he happen to show up in the exact right place at the exact right time?”

Caroline had really been hoping to avoid that question.

But she’s not going to lie. Or even sugar coat. She and Bonnie need to be a united front.

“Klaus has been… searching for descendants of the witch who sealed us in.”

“And?” Bonnie prompts because she really knows Caroline too well.

“And killing them. If they proved unable to help.” She’s not well versed in the intricacies of magic. Only knows that there’s usually a whole heap of terms and conditions. Klaus had explained, sometime last night, when Caroline had been failing at sleep, that the original witch had anchored the spell to her line. That Damon had compelled her very human husband as a means of making her cooperate. She’d refused to lift it no matter what Klaus had offered or threatened.

Damon had, apparently, used every ounce of self-serving cunning and self-preserving intelligence he’d possessed. Without any memory of the undoubtedly heinous orders he’d given the witch’s husband, Damon couldn’t be forced to undo his compulsion. The spell to seal his memories away had involved Bonnie’s blood and the spell to return them required the same ingredients.

And Bonnie was trapped, her blood well out of reach.

Klaus had seethed with frustration as he’d explained, his body a solid mass of tension where they’d been pressed together. His hands had remained gentle, however, his fingers in her hair soothing.

Caroline still wears his scent on her skin and she’s glad Bonnie’s human senses can’t detect it.

“How many?” Bonnie demands.

“You know, I didn’t ask,” Caroline replies, and that’s not a lie. She hadn’t wanted a count for this very reason.

Bonnie rolls her shoulders, a hand coming up to rub at the back of her neck. “I think I need a couple minutes. To make this all make sense. Is that okay?”

Caroline’s already rising and she scoffs, “Of course it’s okay. We’ve dealt with a whole lot of crazy but this is a brand-new level of nuts. You can have all the time you need to process.”

Bonnie smiles. Just a tiny wan quirk of her lips but Caroline will take it. “Thanks, Care.”

“Come downstairs whenever you’re ready. Klaus has been hoarding spell books that might help with the memory thing but honestly, there’s no rush.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Caroline Forbes?”

It’s a terrible joke but Caroline lets that slide. She shrugs, turning when she reaches the door. “It’s not life or death. I’m alive, you’re alive. Everything else we can figure out, right?”

Bon blinks a little, her eyes shining, and Caroline swallows passed a lump in her throat, rushing forward and throwing her arms around Bonnie. She watches her strength, mindful of how much it’s grown, how weak Bonnie had been just yesterday. Bonnie returns the pressure, her breathing shaky, “We’ll figure it out,” Caroline repeats.

This time it’s a promise, one she intends to keep.

* * * * *

Caroline had been on her way back to her room to wash her face and fix her hair. When she’d gotten closer to the staircase she’d heard the voices. They’re too quiet for her to make out the words but one voice is new, just slightly familiar. Her feet take her down the steps quickly, towards an open door.

There’s no real point in cleaning away the evidence of tears. Enzo had always been annoyingly perceptive about her emotional state and, with the events of the last 24 hours, Caroline’s in no position to attempt to act like she’s okay.

Besides, he’s seen her look far worse.

Caroline deeply regrets the hair and leather pants related mistakes she’d made with her humanity off.

She’s not trying to be stealthy and the conversation pauses, a glass hits a table with a clink.

Her hand touches the door and then everything gets blurry. There’s a crash, she feels a whoosh of air, hears a groan and a tear. Caroline shakes her head, blinks, finds herself staring at the back of Klaus’ neck. Enzo’s there too, right in front of Klaus, wide-eyed and unconcerned about the death grip Klaus has on the collar of his jacket.

She’ll chalk that up to his total lack of a survival instinct.

“Manners, Lorenzo,” Klaus warns, mostly friendly but with the tiniest edge of a threat.

Caroline brushes passed Klaus, a laugh bubbling out of her. She plows into Enzo and he grunts but lifts her off her feet in a bone crushing hug. “It has been far too long,” he mutters into her hair.

She returns the embrace just as fiercely, “Doesn’t feel that long for me but I have missed you.” Enzo sets her down and Caroline notes the room’s other occupant. Kol’s here, slouched on a leather sofa. He lifts his glass in her direction in welcome, Caroline supposes he’s over their breakfast table spat.

“Aren’t you two adorable?” Kol drawls.

Enzo shoots him a casual rude gesture and Klaus laughs softly behind her. His hand presses into her hip briefly, drawing Caroline’s attention. “Drink, love?” he murmurs.

She’s hopeful the booze is less terrible than the food. “Yes, please.”

He makes his way to a cart across the room. It holds glasses, several crystal decanters, Klaus pops the top on one and pours a more than healthy portion. Caroline drops down into an armchair, curls her legs under her. Enzo pats her head and she swats at him but he’s still much faster than her, dodging easily as he throws himself down next to Kol.

And props his feet on the coffee table. Caroline glares a little but he grins at her, unrepentant. Caroline half expects Klaus to comment but he doesn’t seem bothered, leans against the arm of her chair after handing her a glass.

“How’s the little witch?” Kol asks, as if he’s genuinely interested.

“Fully recharged,” Caroline tells him. “She wanted a little time alone to process but she’ll be down later.”

“Have you told her…” Klaus lets the sentence hang.

“Everything I know, she knows.” Caroline twists her head to study Klaus’ reaction, searching for a hint of displeasure of disapproval.

Klaus only nods, “Did you discuss what we’d like done with our other guests?”

“Not really.” She and Bonnie had only decided that the first order of business would be to figure out how to restore the memories that Elena and the Salvatores apparently lacked. “I’d like for them to be kept comfortable. Until we can make them remember.”

AKA warm and fed with all their organs and extremities intact.

She watches Kol as she says it. Klaus had already agreed but she remembers Kol being volatile, fond of bats and not a big fan of Damon.

He moans in exaggerated disappointment, his head rolling back against the couch, his expression growing petulant. “You, darling, are a bit of a fun killer, aren’t you?”

“Elijah’s settling them,” Klaus tells her, ignoring his brother’s complaint. “In separate, well stocked rooms.”

“Cells, technically,” Enzo pipes up.

Kol cheers up a bit, “Well, at least that’s a little bit of torture. As clingy and nauseating at their little triangle is.”

“Did Elena go back to Stefan?”

“Back and forth. Back and forth,” Enzo drawls. “For ages.”

“Took her far too long to work out that she didn’t have to,” Kol adds. “Imagine, being a hundred years old and only just realizing you’ve options other than monogamy?”

Unfortunately, Caroline had just taken a sip of her drink. She chokes on it and her throat burns. Her eyes water and she coughs while Klaus pats her on the back. He sounds distinctly amused when he speaks, “She insisted on living with humans. Got a little caught up in the norms.”

“This is really too much information,” Caroline manages, her voice weak. She’s also seriously regretting her honesty is the best policy vow. This is not gossip she wants to have to relay to Bonnie.

“Jealous? You’d developed a bit of a thing for Stefan, hadn’t you?”

Ugh. Had it just been a few minutes ago that she’d been elated to see Enzo?

Klaus straightens next to her, putting more distance between their bodies and lifting his hand away. This time, Caroline does not check his reaction. “I got over that pretty quickly, thank you very much.”

“Oh?” Enzo asks, like he doesn’t believe her.

Caroline takes another sip of her drink, this time welcoming the fire when she swallows. “I wasn’t good with change. With everything that happened with my mom…” Caroline hadn’t been ready to lose her mother. She’d had plans – she’d wanted to graduate college and get a job, to make her mom proud while she could, knowing that by the time she hit thirty-five or so she wouldn’t be able to show her face in Mystic Falls without whispers starting.

With her mother’s death Caroline’s reasons for playing at being human evaporated. She’d taken a leap, dropped out of college, and bought a plane ticket. Had quickly realized that there were plenty of new experiences worth having.

“Stefan was familiar,” Caroline says, keeping it simple because Kol really doesn’t need to know her personal business, outdated though it is. “After I left I found I didn’t actually need familiar.”

“I could have told you that.”

She makes a face, barely resists the urge to stick out her tongue. Enzo’s not the least bit chastised. His boots squeak against the polished coffee table as he gets comfortable. “Tell me, Gorgeous, what’s the plan then? We just wait?”

She’s about to snap an apology for inconveniencing him but Klaus speaks first, “It shouldn’t be too long. I believe we have the spell, the wi…” Caroline sees him glance at her when he pauses. He smiles at her, all warmth and dimples, and corrects himself. “Bonnie just has to look it over. It’ll take a few days to track down the necessary ingredients but she likely shouldn’t be spilling blood immediately, given her condition.”

“Is my usual room ready?” Enzo asks.

It’s so weird that he has a usual freaking room.

“Of course,” Klaus answers, the tiniest hint of offense making the words come out clipped.

Caroline takes another drink. A bigger one. “I’m going to need the full story of how you two became bffs. Like, right now.”

Enzo smirks, his eyes growing gleeful, “It was a rocky road, Gorgeous. There was bloodshed, severed limbs.”

“His,” Klaus mutters darkly.

He doesn’t try to stop the story, however. Only interjects when Enzo begins to embellish and occasionally to supply extra details.

It’s not long until Caroline’s sides hurt from laughing.

For the first time she feels like maybe, somehow, she really will be okay.

* * * * *

It takes a minute for Elena to realize she’s no longer alone. Caroline hadn’t announced herself but she’s kind of surprised Elena’s not more alert. She looks miserable, wrapped in a blanket on the mattress in the corner of the cell. It’s not her only blanket, she’s got a whole pile. Pillows too. It’s only the locked door that makes the room a cell because it’s clean and dry and well lit.

Far nicer than a cave.

The door’s feature small barred cut-outs, high enough that Caroline doesn’t have to duck to look through them.

There are guards behind her, at the bottom of the staircase, but they hadn’t tried to stop or discourage her. Caroline thinks they’re hybrids but she’s not sure how that’s possible. It’s another question to add to her endless list. It’s mental list for now. Klaus had informed her that paper and pens were no longer commonly used. She’d been horrified and he’d smiled, had told he’d sacrifice one of his sketchbooks and some pencils for her until he could track down something suitable.

He’d offered a tablet too but nothing is as satisfying as striking off a task on paper.

Stefan had glanced up as she’d passed his cell. They’d eyed each other for a moment before he’d bowed his head once more.

It had felt like a dismissal and she’d be lying if she claimed it hadn’t annoyed her.

She can hear Damon moving, breathing harshly. Dull thuds that must be him slamming into the walls. Idly, she wonders if putting Elena in the center cell had been purposeful or coincidence. She doesn’t travel beyond Elena’s cell, has no pressing need to check on Damon.

Elena’s still a pretty crier, no snot or splotchy skin, just big fat tears and attractively clumped lashes. Her hair is shorter than Caroline’s ever seen it, resting just at her collarbones but that’s it. Physically, the Elena before her is identical to the Elena she’d always known.

Caroline taps at the door and Elena startles, springing from the bed and pressing her back to the wall. Her face is twisted in anger but confusion takes over when she spots Caroline. “Who are you?” she asks warily.

Well. That’s weird. She’d shared dolls with Elena, games of Candyland. Giggled about crushes and complained about pop quizzes. There’s no hint recognition in Elena’s red-rimmed eyes.

She takes another step closer, “My name’s Caroline.”

Damon’s stilled and Stefan’s risen. A glance to her left and right shows the they’re peering out at her. Elena can’t see them and she’s waiting, like she expects a longer explanation. “Where’s your boss?” she spits, when Caroline remains quiet.

“I don’t have one of those.” Technically, she’s never had one of those. She’d had ideas about trying her hand at a career or two, hadn’t gotten the chance.

“Klaus,” Stefan cuts in. “Where is Klaus?”

Caroline shrugs, points upwards. He’s somewhere upstairs. Bonnie had emerged from her room, had begun to go through the research Klaus has compiled over the years. He’d excused himself to make a call, had said something about arranging for reinforcements. “I’m not a hybrid. Just a regular ol’ vampire. About the same age as you, actually. And I don’t work for Klaus.”

The noise Elena makes is disbelieving. “Sure you don’t. Why else would you be here? Unless you’re…” she trails off, her eyes flitting over Caroline in a way that’s familiar in it’s silent judgement. Caroline’s sure she’s trying to find a safe euphemism but she apparently fails. “…with him,” Elena finishes.

Caroline keeps her reply simple. She doesn’t owe anyone in this basement an explanation. “He’s helping me with something.”

“Klaus doesn’t help people.”

Technically false. “Really? I thought it was pretty helpful when he offered up a hybrid for you to kill so you didn’t spend a few decades going insane.”

Elena shrinks back, growing fearful once more. “How do you know about that?”

“We used to know each other.” Kind of an understatement but Elena’s not going to believe her anyway.

“We’ve never met.”

“We have,” Caroline counters. “I don’t actually remember when.”

Mystic Falls had been small, and big on community celebrations. She assumes she’d met Elena and Bonnie at one of them, had been plopped in a group with kids her age under the semi-attentive eye of whatever grown up was the most likely to go easy on the spiked punch.

Elena’s watching her with some measure of concern. Caroline can’t blame her. A stranger, talking nonsense, while you’re trapped in a cell is bound to be alarming.

She should probably apologize for the kidnapping thing but she’s not sure if Elena deserves it.

Elena moves forward again, her big brown eyes once again pleading, and her voice turns soft. “Listen, Caroline. If you need help, I’ll help you. We’ll help you if you get us out. But Klaus is… Klaus is bad news, okay? You need to get me out of here. Damon and Stefan too. He’s going to kill us. Torture us.”

A demand, one that’s annoyingly condescending. Not even a request.

“He’s not going to torture you.”

Caroline’s hoping that, whatever went down, Elena had been kept in the dark. Damon and Stefan had tended to get high handed and she thinks it’s plausible that they’d decided on a course of action for Elena, had decided what her best interest was and hadn’t cared about collateral damage.

The door to the next cell rattles and she hears a strangled grunt. Glancing over Caroline sees Damon, his pale blue eyes just as startling as she remembers. He’s livid, his color high and his mouth is ringed with dried blood. He makes more sounds, feral inarticulate noises that don’t resemble actual words.

Elena’s frantic, stretched up on her toes, her head pressed to the bars but there’s no way she can see Damon. She glares at Caroline, “Do you not consider cutting out a tongue torture?”

A throat clears behind her and one of the guard pipes up, “Technically, that was Kol.”

Ah. She should have known. He’d acquiesced so easily.

Caroline wonders if she should be outraged but she finds she can’t muster the energy. ““I mean, it is but it’ll grow back.”

Elena gasps, “That’s not the point.”

“The Damon I remember was really bad at knowing when to shut up.”

Elena recoils, watching Caroline warily now. “And that makes it okay?”

It’s not a debate Caroline’s willing to entertain, especially when there’s no point in reminding Elena what a giant freaking hypocrite she’s being.

Stefan says her name, catching her attention. “Caroline,” he repeats, drawing out the syllables. “Klaus asked us about you. Several times.”

This time the noise Damon makes is a snarl and Caroline figures those were not civilized conversations. “Like I said, he’s been helping me.”

“For a hundred years?”

“More like a hundred and fifty.”

She can still read Stefan. He’s measuring her, trying to figure out how loyal she is to Klaus, if he can use her. He’s going to be disappointed. “An awfully long time,” he finally says, carefully neutral.

Caroline laughs even though none of her present company will get the joke, “Didn’t feel like it.”

She studies each of her old friends in turn. Stefan’s got his brows furrowed in frustration, Damon’s tense like he’s considering going for her throat, thick doors be damned. Elena’s sad and anxious, her knuckles white where they clutch the edge of the window.

Part of her hadn’t understood what it meant that she’d been erased. She’d half expected recognition. That seeing her in the flesh would shake whatever magic that had been weaved loose. She’d hoped for answers. At the very least she’d wanted a target for her anger.

Of course it’s not that simple.

* * * * *

She’d planned to sleep in her own bed.

Had showered, explored the bottles and tubes of sweet-smelling lotions and creams that had appeared in the bathroom adjacent to the room she’d been given. Had used up several hours making notes in the sketchbook Klaus had provided while scouring the internet for answers to some of her more practical questions.

She’s super disappointed that flying cars still haven’t become a common mode of transportation.

When she’d settled under the covers and closed her eyes she’d begun to get anxious. It wasn’t the silence because music hadn’t help. She’d turned on a lamp, just in case it was the dark. She’d grown tense as she’d lain there, struggling to take even inhales and exhales. Had thrown off the blankets once she’d grown hot and sweat slicked.

Her mind had kept returning to waking up alone, in the cave. To the moment when she’d realized she was trapped, when she hadn’t been sure if Bonnie was alive. She’d felt utterly alone and so scared. That same terror creeps into her bones, until she’s shaking and curled into a tight ball, her teeth grinding together.

Maybe she should have stuck it out. She’d known she was safe. That Bonnie was just next door, that it would be daylight again in just a few hours.

The longer she’d lain there, unsleeping, the harder it had been to tell herself that she needed to.

Why she should have to suffer? It’s not like Klaus is going to judge her or turn her away. He’d made that clear last night. She’s not sure what time it is when she gives up, only knows that she can’t hear a peep from any of the other occupants of the house.

She finds Klaus’ door wide open.

She can see him propped up in the center of his bed. He watches her approach, shifts to one side, an invitation he doesn’t bother to voice.

She reaches behind her once she crosses the threshold and shuts the door, fingers fumbling for a lock.

It’s warm when she tucks herself under the covers and she sighs and stretches out her legs, her muscles unclenching in relief. Klaus sinks down until his head rests on a pillow, on his side facing her. There’s no hint that she’s not welcome.

It used to make her jittery, the way Klaus looked at her. She’d tried to tell herself that he wasn’t actually interested, that he had a motive or a lack of other prospects in the immediate vicinity. That his pretty words were practiced lines and that he’d offered trips and trinkets to a thousand people before her.

Caroline knows she was wrong. That if she’d been only convenient he never would have bothered digging her out of that cave.

That should scare her.

Should.

Caroline pulls the heavy comforter over her shoulders, wonders if she should just say screw it and cross the few inches that separate her from Klaus now, or if she should make a show of getting heavy eyed and sleepy first.

“Something wrong with your bed, love?” Klaus teases.

Ugh, he’s so not going to let her get away with faking sleep before she gets hands-y, is he?

She rolls until she faces away from Klaus but rests against him. “Shut up,” she mutters, reaching back to grab his arm. She wraps it around her middle, rests her hand over top of his and squirms until they’re comfortably pressed together. He takes the hint beautifully, his legs bending to tangle with hers.

She feels him laughing, his breath against the back of her neck. “I’ll take that as a no, then.”

They shift, settling, and Caroline finds that she can breathe easy now that she can focus on the faint thrum of Klaus’ heartbeat. “How did your visit downstairs go?” he asks.

Caroline scoffs, tugs at a leather cord on his wrist, “Like your minions didn’t report back my every word.”

“They would have. I didn’t ask.”

Caroline finds that she’s smiling, presses her face into the pillow to try to hide it. It’s a simple statement but it tells her that Klaus trusts her. She hadn’t expected that.

“They don’t remember me. I knew they wouldn’t but I still didn’t totally expect it. I felt… expendable a lot, you know? I thought I’d gotten past that but… they kind of brought that all back.”

His grip on her tightens, his stubble scraping her skin as he shakes his head. “You are not expendable.”

“I know,” she answers, firm and steady.

Caroline isn’t who she’d been when she’d called Mystic Falls home. Getting out had been good to her. She’d lost the instinct to second guess her actions, to wonder if her choices would negatively impact her friends. Outside of the tiny town, away from all the people who’d known her all her life, she hadn’t worried about anyone whispering about how she was disgracing her family name or embarrassing her mother.

She’d shed insecurities as she’d hopped planes and trains.

Caroline knows she deserves to be happy, that she matters. Leap frogging into the future hasn’t changed her mind.

“Good,” Klaus rumbles, a wealth of satisfaction in his tone.

Caroline shifts back slightly, nudging him with her elbow, “What? Did you seriously expect me to argue?”

She knows he’s smiling, can hear it in his taunt, “Are you implying that you’re not argumentative, love?”

Caroline twists to glare at him, “I’m going to ignore that obvious baiting because I recognize that I’m totally invading your space right now.”

“It’s not baiting, it’s a statement of fact. And I’m not implying it’s a defect. Quite the opposite, really.”

She studies Klaus carefully, judges that he’s being honest, and turns until her head’s once more resting on the pillow. “So I like a lively debate, sue me,” she mutters.

Klaus laughs, so softly that she feels it more than hears it. Caroline closes her eyes, lets the warmth of him behind her help ease her into sleep.

Tomorrow’s bound to be another whirlwind of a day.

#klaroline #klaroline drabbles #yay sequels finally #ybtn

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livinglikearoyal · 5 years ago

Text

Love on a Schedule | Namjoon

Summary: You were able to join the boys on their trip to New Zealand and comfort Namjoon when he is unable to enjoy the trip due to stress.

Inspired by Bon Voyage S4 : E6 when Namjoon decided to forgo cycling to work and the anonymous request “I was just wondering if I could request a Namjoon/reader oneshot based on the lyric “let them be them, let us be us” from Love Maze.”

Director Junsoo to camp. Namjoon has decided to return to the campsite. Please ensure that the cameras around the site are ready for his arrival. No personnel is required to remain onsite other than camera op one. Once again, Namjoon will be returning to the campsite for the afternoon. Once the site is prepared, no personnel required to remain besides camera op one.

The rise in volume signals the departure of the staff that remained at the cabins for the day. Quiet murmurs spread throughout the common room as the men and women that expected to have the afternoon off to rest and prepare for the rest of their trip find this time put momentarily on hold.

Director Hyangmi veers away from the small group heading toward the door when she sees you standing near the front desk, holding your coffee mug. Moving to meet her halfway, you prepare to ask your question when she interrupts.

“You want to go, don’t you.” It was a statement and not a question. It seems as if she has gotten to know you well as that is exactly what you want. Her face is stern for a moment before it breaks into a small smile. “Give it an hour or so for the camera op to get some footage for the broadcast. After that, you can head that way. While the camera op is there be sure…”

“To remain inconspicuous. The camera shouldn’t see or hear me. Understood!” You give an exaggerated salute.

The director shakes her head as she chuckles, “I’m glad you were able to come along this time, Y/N. We’ll be back shortly.”

You return to your seat near the fireplace and continue to eat your previously forgotten lunch as your mind wanders.

Namjoon has been having a rough time lately. The month-long break was meant to be a time for the band and company members alike to recharge and refocus themselves: go on trips, visit friends and family, eat whatever they want, sleep the day away. While on paper and in the headlines this seems like a fantastic idea, for a person like Namjoon, it was a struggle. He had been working almost without pause for nearly ten years. His love and dedication to his work is something that he takes pride in, even when it is at its most challenging. So to have a month where the expectations are not for him to produce content but to stay out of the studio, it caused its own form of anxiety for Namjoon. While you weren’t able to be with him due to your own job, you know that he tried the normal vacation things: trips to other countries, countless museums, walks with his dog and bike rides along the river, dinners with his family. He did all of that. He enjoyed all of that. However, at the end of the day, he felt like he was neglecting what he should truly be doing.

You were able to join Namjoon for the last week of his vacation. He treated you to a trip that you had been wanting to take for as long as he could remember and ended it with a couple of nights spending time with both of your families. While you had been able to see his internal conflicts during the countless video calls you had with him and you tried to cheer him up, it was during this week when he opened up about how he struggled with the break. He confessed that he felt the stress building and almost guiltily showed you the notebook of lyrics, ideas, and deadlines he just couldn’t help but put into writing throughout the month.

Now, you were allowed to follow the boys to New Zealand and spend some more time with Namjoon, albeit interrupted time. You have to respect the filming schedule for Bon Voyage. Essentially if there is a cameraman around–you should not be seen or heard. This is when BTS having seven members comes in handy. When some of the members go on an excursion or begin to do something ridiculous, that is when you and Namjoon can have some time to yourselves. The crew usually goes to the bare minimum shortly after dinner so you can usually spend some time with the entire group at that point as well. Otherwise, it was very hit and miss. With that being said, you were provided lodging in the cabins near the campsite and got to see the beauty of New Zealand while spending time with your boyfriend so you can’t complain too much. At all, really.

Coming back to reality, you notice that over an hour has passed. You grab your bag and stop by the kitchen before heading toward the star of your daydreams.

You see the camera operator leaving the RV as you make it to the campsite. He nods to you in acknowledgment and holds the door open, gently closing it once you are safely on the interior steps.

Namjoon doesn’t initially notice your appearance. His hands are in his hair, leaning over his notebook like a desperate college student trying to block out the nonexistent library noise after a regretful night of partying before an exam. You can hear faint sounds coming from his earbuds and can see the tension radiating off of his frame.

It isn’t until you place the steaming mugs that you brought along with you onto the table that he registers that he has a visitor.

“Thanks,” he says while scratching out something in his notebook.

“Anytime.”

Looking up for the first time, his surprised look quickly fades to one of curiosity.

“Babe?”

“Filming is over for a while. I got here right as he left.”

“I didn’t even see him leave.”

“Understandable. You were really focused.”

“How’d you know…”

“Everyone knows your here this afternoon, Joon. They announced it over the walkies. The director said they’d only film you for about an hour.”

“Ahh, yeah. I messed up their afternoon off.” He tosses the pen he has been writing with onto the table and leans his head back.

“That’s not it. They know you.”

He opens his eyes to look at you in question. When you don’t respond, he sighs and finally takes a drink from his mug.

“Have a seat?”

You run your hand lightly through his hair before settling onto the bench across from him. You grab a book from your bag before taking a sip from your own mug and making yourself comfortable.

“You’re not going to tell me to stop working?”

“Would it help if I did?”

A pause. “Probably not.”

“Then no, I won’t.” You smile softly at him. “I’ll just read a little bit while you work. Maybe I can even help you think of a word or something when you can’t quite think of how you want to say it.”

You take another sip of your drink before opening your book. The smile that Namjoon sends your way goes unnoticed by you.

After finishing a couple of chapters in your book, you stretch and take in your surroundings. Your feet have found their way onto the bench across from you so that your lower legs are resting against Namjoon’s thighs. Observing the man in question, he is in an almost identical position as he was when you entered the RV. You spend some time watching him: the tapping of his fingers against his head or paper, his grip on the pen, his mouth forming unknown words. Only after he lets out several frustrated sighs do you nudge him with your feet to capture his attention. He looks up and removes one of his earbuds; eyebrow raised in question.

“What about a change of scenery?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why don’t we take this outside? The sunshine and view might help your ideas flow better. It is starting to get kind of stuffy in here anyway.”

He looks around reluctantly, “We could open the windows?”

“Namjoon.”

He sighs. “Alright. It wouldn’t hurt to stretch a little bit anyway.”

Grabbing your book and a blanket from the bed, you take his unopened water bottle and lead the way out of the RV. You glance around the campsite and find the perfect spot to sit. The two of you take your time walking the short distance to the pair of chairs set up near the lake, where you lay the blanket out in front of both of them.

“Lay down.” You point to the blanket.

“Y/N, I didn’t know…”

“Don’t make it weird. Just lay down, please?”

He grins and lays down on his back after setting his notebook, phone, and pen safely in one of the chairs.

“Roll over.”

You sit down next to him as he does so before saying, “Oh, so you aren’t going to make that rated R?”

He chuckles and a smile comes to your face when you see his entire body shake because of this.

“Take a bit of a break, Joonie,” you say. “Stretch out and relax for a few minutes.”

He lays his head on his arms and looks at you with a smile.

“That sounds good.”

“Hmmm,” you respond before kneeling and beginning to massage his back and shoulders.

“That feels good.”

“Hmmm.”

The next fifteen minutes are spent with his eyes closed and your hands working their magic on the tension in his back and neck. The only sounds that can be heard are that of the surrounding wildlife and the occasional gasp or groan as you hit a particularly tender spot. You are content to continue for quite a while longer when you notice that his eyes are open and you can see the thoughts forming.

“I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

“For this.”

Your hands stop their ministrations and you sit back so you can look at him better.

“What?”

He sighs and sits up as well.

“We can rarely spend time together. And whenever we can spend time together, my mind is elsewhere. That isn’t fair to you. Everyone else can go to dinners together whenever they want, stay at home to watch movies, spend birthdays at amusement parks. But you’re stuck with me, an idol that can’t be seen in public even if he had the time and energy to go out. A songwriter that sucks at putting his thoughts into words. A stressed workaholic that can’t find a balance between home and work, even after a decade. A boyfriend that can’t treat his girlfriend like they do in movies.” He grimaces. “We have to love on a schedule. And when we do find the time, it seems like you are always taking care of me. I’m sorry.”

It takes a moment for all of that to sink in. In that moment, Namjoon seems to shrink into himself and looks down at his hands.

You place a hand over his and use your other hand to guide his chin upward to look at you, finally resting it on his cheek. The unshed tears in his eyes are mirrored in your own.

“Namjoon, you have nothing to apologize to me for. I enjoy taking care of others. That’s why I do what I do for a living. The fact that I have this amazingly strong, ambitious, and responsible boyfriend that allows me to take care of him, makes me feel important. Special. We all have a lot on our plates and you are no different. The amount of expectation and responsibilities that you have is unreal. You have so many upcoming projects to balance along with the responsibilities of being a leader and brother to the guys. But you manage it and you succeed more times than not. And the amazing thing about you is that you take those times that you don’t succeed and create the most beautiful and inspiring work from it, whether you share it with the public or not.”

A tear falls as he shakes his head.

“You are one of the most important people in my life, Joonie. Of course, I want to take care of you. Of course, I’d love if we could be together at all times of day and have that typical fairytale romance. But you know what? I absolutely adore what we have. It gives us both the opportunity to flourish in our own independence while also having the comfort of knowing that the other is just a phone call away. That distance…that makes times like this even more sweet and memorable. This relationship has not only brought me you, my prince charming, but it has also brought so many more people into my family. The guys and crew feel like my brothers and sisters. I hope that my family and friends are the same for you?”

He nods.

“So what if we can’t have dinner in the same room every night. So what if we don’t spend our birthdays together at arcades or amusement parks. That is what everyone else does. Let them be them. Let us be us. I absolutely love every single moment we have spent together. Every single trip. Every word. Every touch. It doesn’t matter if we are somewhere extraordinary like this or on different sides of the globe, speaking through the phone. I’ve loved it all. You are home to me.”

You kiss him gently on the lips.

“I love you. I love you the most.”

“Y/N, I…” Namjoon tilts his head like he can’t figure out what to say before he moves forward, capturing your lips in his once again.

“I love you, Y/N.”

Your smile is reflected on his face as you scoot to sit between his legs and lean into him. His arms come to wrap around you and he leans his chin on your shoulder. The two of you sit looking at the gorgeous scenery for an unknown period of time, sharing gentle kisses and touches, whispered promises.

“You know, you can go ahead and work on your music if you want to. I’ll stay,” you say softly after you give him a kiss on the cheek.

“You sure?”

“Hmmm. If there is ever a time when I want or need your undivided attention, I will let you know. Just like I hope you would let me know. Right now though, I just want to be around you. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing.”

“Alright.” He places a kiss on your temple before untangling his limbs from yours to stand up and retrieve his supplies. He soon returns, handing you the book you had been reading before laying down on his stomach and getting to work. You watch him for a few moments before making yourself comfortable, using his back as a pillow. You let out a contented sigh when you feel his back move slightly, signaling that he has started to write.

You’ll have to be sure to thank Director Hyangmi when you get back to the cabins for having the crew avoid filming near the lake once everyone returned.

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a-decent-steve-coogan-blog · 5 years ago

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Steve Coogan Reaches the End of ‘The Trip’

New York Times 20.05.2020.

He plays a version of himself in the movie series, which is ending with “The Trip to Greece.” In reality “I’m not quite as precious as I come across. But there’s certainly a lot of truth in it.”

As fans of “The Trip” movies know well by now, Steve Coogan has a shelf full of Baftas, the British equivalent of the Oscars. It’s a feat turned running gag throughout the films as he flaunts it at virtually every opportunity.

So when Rob Brydon, his traveling companion and comic foil, asks Coogan what he’s proudest of in “The Trip to Greece,” the answer is perhaps not surprising.

“My seven Baftas,” Coogan says.

“For me, it would be my children,” Brydon says.

“Well, because you haven’t got any Baftas,” Coogan replies.

“You have got children,” Brydon retorts.

In “The Trip to Greece,” opening Friday on video on demand and some theaters, the preening Coogan and laissez-faire Brydon, playing slightly exaggerated versions of themselves, come to the end of their decade-long series of gastronomic excursions. The structure is familiar: They drive through breathtaking scenery on their way to multi-star restaurants and hotels, peppering their conversations with bon mots, celebrity impersonations and insults.

Only this time, the director Michael Winterbottom has given the men six days to retrace Odysseus’ 10-year journey from Troy to Ithaca, while finding their own ways back home.

In a Zoom session from his house in Sussex, England, a mustachioed Coogan, 54 — who in real-life received two Oscar nominations for “Philomena” (2013) along with those seven Baftas — spoke about staying relevant in middle age, imagining where his character winds up, and quarantining with his 23-year-old daughter, Clare, and her boyfriend.

“I’m just this kind of slightly annoying dad that comes in and goes, ‘What are you guys doing?’” he said, with a flash of goofy laughter. There wasn’t a Bafta in sight.

These are edited excerpts from our conversation.

How have you been coping during quarantine?

I’m lucky that I’m in lockdown with my daughter, who’s just a fantastic cook. Each night I go, “Oh my God, this is the best thing I’ve ever tasted in my life.” And I’ve been writing a lot, because that’s one thing that we are still able to do. We already isolated ourselves.

What have you been churning out?

I’m a bigamist writer; I’ve got various partners. I’m writing a post-woke comedy-drama — a sort of romance, really — with a female writer in L.A. We’re navigating the rocks of the new sexual political landscape, shall we say. I’ve also written a drama about a hippie commune in Wales in 1969. And Jeff Pope and I wrote about the woman who found the body of Richard III in a car park. This is the third screenplay we’ve written since “Philomena,” and it’s quite odd that two middle-age men write stories about female empowerment. [Laughs] We’re desperately trying to hang on by writing things that are proper, modern.

I’ll write another Alan Partridge, too [a reference to his vain talk-show host character]. It’s nice to do stuff that’s pure comedy because then when you write it, you laugh a lot. And when you laugh, it releases endorphins — or is it serotonin? Pleasure chemicals, I get them confused. [It’s endorphins.] But anyway, it makes you feel good.

With “The Trip” movies, you’ve eaten and written your way through northern England, Italy and Spain. How did you, Rob and Michael decide that Greece would be your last adventure?

Four felt right. And Greece, it was a classic. The Greek philosophy and mythology lent themselves to this huge, contemplative quality, and having me returning home and mimicking Homer’s “Odyssey” to this sort of conclusiveness. We also felt on a level, “Let’s quit while they’re still good.” That’s not saying we’d never do another one, but it feels like we should wait. Right now our thing is middle-age angst, but pretty soon it will just be old-man angst.

These movies are a showcase for Steve’s attempts at erudition. Do you actually have all that knowledge rattling around in your head?

I do prep work, but I’m naturally curious. I had a quite good education, I would say. I went to a Catholic school, which in this country was a bit like a free private education. The curse is, if you’re from very humble origins and you haven’t had a good education, you don’t know what you don’t know. Then if you’re half well-educated, the curse is that you’re aware of the knowledge you don’t have. That’s what I felt I was. In answer to that, I love to learn.

So yes, I do my homework. Rob doesn’t do his homework, but that’s almost deliberate, because he can trivialize my quest for the truth, as it were.

This time around, Steve’s father is seriously ill. You lost your own father two years ago. What was it like tapping into such personal memories?

Funnily enough, I did a version where I was very emotional. I wept as I would when I re-emulated some of those scenes. Then Michael wanted me to do it again and just hold it all back. I think it’s probably better for that, because audiences don’t like completely candid displays of emotion, whether happiness or sadness. Audiences like to look for stuff. And painful stuff is where you find good art, I suppose. Otherwise you end up with some vanilla-flavored mediocrity.

What misconception might viewers of “The Trip” have about you?

I’m not quite as precious as I come across. But there’s certainly a lot of truth in it as well.

Onscreen, Steve grapples with relevancy in middle age. And offscreen?

Right now I’m probably the happiest I’ve been — with the proviso that there’s no such thing as a state of big happiness. I’d like to work a bit less, to be honest. But I’m grateful that I’m able to make creative choices based purely on whether I believe in the thing I’m doing. Also, weirdly, this lockdown meant that I discovered a parallel universe in my daughter that I hadn’t really been aware of before, because I’ve not spent this long with her since she was a child. That’s a kind of strange blessing.

What life do you imagine for Steve now that his journey has ended?

When I shot that scene of going home, it felt strangely poignant — almost as if, I said to Rob afterward, I got dementia in my old age, I might imagine that that was my life. It felt real. And in my head I suppose it plays out that he does come home, he does return to the stability of those people that love him. Craving the stability more than the excitement of being rootless, of being nomadic. Yeah, it’s a funny little thing, playing a version of yourself.

#steve coogan #new york times #The trip to Greece #juststeve

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chiseler · 5 years ago

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Puttin’ on the Ritz

No fame is more fleeting than the showbiz kind. Some entertainers are just too much in and of a particular time. In the 1920s Harry Richman was a big star, billed as the Greatest Entertainer In America. He could sing and play piano, dance and act a little; he ran a hugely successful nightclub, was the toast of Broadway and, very briefly, a star in Hollywood; he wrote or introduced several songs that are still sung. But most of all he just personified the Roaring Twenties. He was the sleek, rakish, vaguely smarmy bon vivant in top hat and tails who was enjoying the decade's non-stop party as much as you were. It's been said that he was to the 1920s what the Rat Pack were to their era. Harry's career peaked just as the party crashed to a halt at the end of the decade, and he faded out in the 1930s. If his name comes up at all today, it's probably less often as an entertainer than as a footnote in aviation history.

He was born Harry Reichman in Cincinnati in 1895. His dad, a Russian Jewish immigrant, started out peddling eyeglasses door to door, carrying all his equipment on his back. He worked his way up to a prosperous wholesale business and real estate empire, and developed a taste for the high life. It killed him by the time Harry was an adolescent. In his thoroughly entertaining (sometimes suspiciously so) 1966 autobiography A Hell of a Life, Harry paints himself as a fecklessly scheming kid who grew up quick. At nine, he writes, he was a weekend ticket taker at an amusement park, shortchanging every customer he could because he was saving up to marry his childhood sweetheart. One night he showed off his ill-gotten riches by taking the girl out on the town. They stayed out too late to go home, so Harry got them a hotel room. When the cops burst through the door in the wee hours they found the kids sleeping fully clothed on separate beds. A doctor confirmed that the girl's honor was intact. Her dad put the kibosh to their romance anyway.

Harry's mother bought him piano lessons, dreaming he'd be a concert pianist, but like most kids at the time he was more interested in ragtime and jazz. He left home at around fourteen and headed to Indianapolis. There he and a kid who played fiddle went door to door in the kind of neighborhoods where an upright in the parlor wasn't uncommon. They'd bang out a few popular tunes for spare change. As Remington & Reichman they were soon touring the very small-time Webster circuit of vaudeville theaters in the Dakotas and Canada, known to vaudevillians as the Death Trail. Harry kept working his way around the west, singing at the piano in saloons and whorehouses, working as a singing waiter in restaurants, as part of a "Hawaiian" hula act in a circus sideshow. At the 1915 Panama-Pacific International Exhibition in San Francisco he was in a musical act that opened for Harry Houdini, fifteen shows a day. Playing in Los Angeles clubs favored by the movie crowd he got to be pals with Charlie Chaplin and Al Jolson, whom he idolized. Jolson got him a shot at Ziegfeld's Midnight Frolic, the late-night club revue that gave Eddie Cantor his big break. Harry raced to New York, but flopped and was canned after only one night. He was so despondent he ran off and joined the Navy.

He arrived back in New York in 1920, just when Prohibition did too. Now he and the city were ready for each other. On vaudeville stages he found work as an accompanist for headliners like the singer Nora Bayes and the beautiful twin Dolly Sisters, and for a while was Mae West's on-stage pianist and straight man. He was reluctant to speak lines at first because he had a lisp that he could hide more easily when singing. West convinced him it was a distinguishing feature. He soon got top billing on his own on the Keith-Albee circuit. He also played at ritzy speakeasies like the Beaux Arts, where, he claims, Prohibition's hostess with the mostest Texas Guinan stole her signature line "Give the little girls a big hand" from him.

Nils T. Granlund, known as NTG, was both a radio pioneer and the publicist for Marcus Loew's movie theater empire. He hired Harry to headline live radio shows from Loew's State Theatre, the movie palace in Times Square. Harry plugged new songs on air, like Billy Rose's "Does the Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor on the Bedpost Overnight?" With NTG's help he opened his own Club Richman just behind Carnegie Hall. Harry made it one of the most opulent and exclusive nightclub/speakeasies in town. A lot of Broadway and movie stars became regulars, as of course did Mayor Jimmy Walker, and the Vanderbilts and Whitneys, and foreign royalty -- you saw everybody who was anybody there.

Or wanted to be somebody, like the chorus girl Lucille Le Seur. Accounts vary as to how Lucille got into the swank club. In one version, she convinced NTG, her sugar daddy at the time, to get her a spot in the club dancing the Charleston. NTG introduced her to Loew, who arranged a screen test at MGM, where she'd get her first tiny roles in 1925. Studio chief Louis B. Mayer decided her name sounded like Le Sewer, so the studio ran a publicity campaign in which the fans got to give her a new name: Joan Crawford. She never liked it.

For his part, Harry claimed that he discovered Crawford. He did have an eye for the beauties. He was one of the first to spot Jean Harlow, Sally Rand and Maureen O'Sullivan. Harry was an infamous ladies' man, bedding a long line of beauties from chorus girls to socialites to Harlow, maybe Rand, and Clara Bow. According to Harry, his office at the club had a secret door for sneaking them in and out while their husbands or dates drummed their fingers at their tables thinking they were just taking a long time powdering their noses. He says that the Hollywood Bowl couldn't hold all the women he had, and classes himself "a specialist in man's favorite sport."

Between the club and his other gigs Harry minted money and became the playboy nonpareil. He wore the finest bespoke suits and carried a gold cigarette case with his initials on it in diamonds. He commuted in a Rolls from Manhattan to his big house out on the water in Beechhurst, Queens, where he had a yacht and threw Gatsby-like parties for celebrities, beauties and millionaires. He learned to fly and kept a growing fleet of planes at nearby Flushing Airport. Harry worked hard, played hard, drank oceans of booze and smoked whole fields of tobacco. Everyone marveled at his stamina and joie de vivre even in that over-the-top decade.

In 1926, while still playing the host at his club, Harry got a featured role on Broadway in George White's Scandals, one of several knockoffs of the Ziegfeld Follies. After a boffo year it toured other cities, including Cincinnati, where, he notes ruefully, it tanked. In 1930 he headlined Lew Leslie's International Revue, where he introduced "On the Sunny Side of the Street." And in 1931 he made it, finally, into the Follies as well. He got his choice of songs to perform, including "Lullaby of Broadway." He was at the top of his career in those shows, the king of Broadway; his friend Eddie Cantor memorably said he wore Broadway like a boutonniere.

He didn't do so well in Hollywood. He starred, playing himself as "Harry Raymond," in the 1930 musical Puttin' on the Ritz, in which he introduced the song by his pal Irving Berlin. The movie did mediocre business then and is barely watchable now except for that number, Harry gliding around in front of an army of dancers with his top hat tilted over one eye. His recording of the song, which some consider the best, was a hit. (Among his other records are Berlin's "Blue Skies," his own "Muddy Waters" and a pretty wonderful Jolson-ish rendition of "Ain't She Sweet.") While in Hollywood to make the film he met Clara Bow. Teamed up at first for publicity purposes only, they became a hot item and got engaged. Then she suddenly married someone else. Hearing the news, he says, was the only time in his life that he fainted.

He'd make only two more feature films and one short. He sums them up this way: "All were forgettable. It became clear to me that whatever I had was best projected in person, either on the stage or in a night club." By the time he made the last film, released in 1938, he was well past his prime. When the Depression hit and then Prohibition ended, guys like Harry, icons of the Roaring Twenties, just didn't fit the new reality. To his credit, he didn't hang around like some other ghosts of the 1920s did. He left New York and settled in Miami, which was booming and lousy with new nightclubs where he could coast for a few years on his dazzling past. He went fishing with Hemingway and played with his airplanes.

His real fame in the 1930s came in fact as a flyer. In the mid-1930s he'd set altitude and speed records. Then in 1935 he and the pilot Dick Merrill made the world's first round-trip transatlantic flight in a single-engine plane. They filled the plane with tens of thousands of ping-pong balls as flotation devices should they land in the soup. Harry being Harry, after reaching Wales on the outward leg of the trip, they flew on to Paris to party all night with Maurice Chevalier before making the return flight. They landed upside-down in a Newfoundland bog, but they made it. It wasn't as big a deal as Lindbergh's one-way crossing in 1927, but Harry calls it the high point of his life.

Harry didn't make much news after that. He played some clubs through the 1940s, his looks and voice rough from all that carousing and smoking. He still had lots of friends in the show business who tried to engineer comebacks for him, but the public had long since forgotten him. By the time A Hell of a Life came out in 1966 he'd spent the millions he'd made in his heyday and was living alone, quietly and frugally, in Burbank, an old guy who'd gone full-tilt as long as he could, had a hell of a lot of memories and not too many regrets. He died in 1972.

by John Strasbaugh

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morethanithoughtofficialblog · 5 years ago

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Chapter 8: I’m a simple human, nothing more than that.

In which you almost cried in a friend’s house

*Your POV*

I had to go to the doctor to see if my injury wasn't anything serious.

Turns out it was.

He had to put twenty-five stitches on my fingers. Obviously not twenty-five on each of them, of course not. They were twenty-five in total...

Wow, you are such an idiot. Who the fuck punches a mirror?! You'll probably feel worse than before...

And that was true.

The doctor recommended me to avoid any activities involving my fingers. That practically is avoiding any activity at all. But I, being the stubborn woman I am, won't listen to this suggestion he made, although it sounded more like an order. Still, I can't quit my job just because I did something stupid.

So I arrived at my messy apartment, angrier with myself than before. I felt like trash. But, after seeing the pleased and happy faces of all those people, I feel like I can't give up. So I'll continue living...

For now, of course.

I changed into my pajamas and sat on the couch. I surely don't want to go to my room yet, remembering what happened yesterday. Or today. Whatever.

When I was scrolling through the channels my phone buzzed, and I took it without hesitation. I watched TV a bit before checking the notification but I got bored and decided to see it.

Sans: hey

Sans: can i ask u something???

Well, that was new. Sans had never messaged me before; or well, at least not in private. After all, he did say a few jokes and puns to me especially, but only in the chat group with everyone else.

You: Go ahead

I silently prayed for it to don't be something related to my past or my backstory. It's really complicated and hurtful to explain; maybe it wouldn't make me cry, but it would definitely make me uncomfortable.

Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me. Please, not about me.

Please, not about me-

Sans: i noticed an injury on ur right fingers today

Sans: wanted to make sure what happened

...phew.

Still, I couldn't just tell this guy that I punched a freaking mirror. He would probably block me and stare at my soul whenever we would meet. And it was for a fact that I will see him more, so...

You: Oh, about that...

You: It was an accident

Wow, that didn't look suspicious at all.

Sans: really?

You: Yeah, pretty much me being stupid

At least you didn't lie this time.

Sans: oh

Sans: it wasn't somethin' serious, tho?

You: A bit

Sans: stitches?

Wait, why does he know about stitches? He doesn't even need them!

You: Actually, yes

Why did you say that?! You are supposed to keep it a secret!

...

Even if he was going to find out anyway...

Sans: oh shit

Sans: how many?

Well, it's not like it's there any point in lying...

You: Twenty-five

Sans: jesus, what did u do?

Sans: r u ok now, tho?

You: Pretty much

Sans: well, that's good, kiddo

I'm fucking twenty-

Sans: welp, that's all i wanted to know

Sans: srry if i bothered ya

You: Nonsense!

You: That's actually really nice of you!

You: I mean, to actually care enough to ask

Sans: eh, it's nothin'

Sans: i was goin' to ask ya there, but thought it would be better in...

Sans: private?

You: I understand; talking about someone's injuries it's not that great of a topic.

You: It would have been catastrophic if Mrs. Dreemurr or Mrs. Arial knew

Sans: yeah

Sans: welp

Sans: i should go by now

You: I bet

You: Have a good night, Sans

Sans: you too, (l/n)

It was quite a conversation, I must say. I mean; Sans called me by my last name at the end, which it's weirdly formal. And, out of all the people, he was the one who asked. Maybe he was the only one that noticed something odd on my hand, but I highly doubt it. It was visibly out of place.

Or well.

At least for a human.

It's hard to remember that we don't have the same problems, physically talking. Some of the monsters that confuse me the most are the skeletons and the fish-like. How could skeletons feel anything at all? One day I heard Arial complaining about how hot the day was, and that's... weird. How Undyne can breathe? She's out of the water! Unless she has lungs...

But wait- skeletons don't have lungs...

This is confusing as fuck.

How could Sans have noticed something odd to my hand, though? It's either he had seen it before on Frisk, or he actually researches a lot about humans. That would be weird as well. I mean, it would be like he had a human fetish. And that's scary.

I'm making him sound like he's a fucking rapist.

I felt shivers down my spine and quickly shook my head. It was disturbing to think like that, to say the least. I don't think someone like Sans could have such a guilty pleasure.

But maybe he's just like me.

I mean- not as a fetish! But more like... curiosity. After all, I do have my doubts about monsters. I just made some five minutes ago. So he has all the right to know about humans as I do about monsters. Or maybe we don't. But hey, how a freak can judge another?

...

Did I just call Sans a freak? I barely know the guy, for God's sake!

I felt worse, naturally. I would apologize to him, but he doesn't know that I called him a freak. He doesn't need to know, either.

As much as I wanted to avoid it, I had to enter my bedroom eventually. This night, though, I decided to take a sleeping pill. And just like that, I was knocked out on my bed, forgetting that my daily dose should be a quarter of a pill.

Good thing I have an alarm, or else I would have been on dreamland forever. Well, I don't remember what I dreamed, but that's not the point. The thing is that I have work to do, so I can't sleep all day.

And so I got ready and went to work, taking the subway like every day. And, for my surprise, I saw a family of monsters hanging out on the subway station. I smiled, knowing that now they can take public services.

I arrived and went straight for a cup of coffee and a mini donut. Miracle there was any food to eat with the coffee; good thing they actually had coffee and not water. I need my drug to start the day. Always.

Such a coincidence I was listening to that song: 'Always' by Bon Jovi. Such a nice and romantic ballad, cheesy and totally different from what I use to hear. But hey, whenever it's a rock classic, I have a reason to listen to it. Especially if it is a ballad of Bon Jovi. They are just unique.

Fun thing: I was listening also to a song called 'Unique', by Lenka. It's not a classic; it isn't even Rock N' Roll, but I like the calm and cheery tone it has. The lyrics have a direct and almost literal meaning, and it's really positive.

The group of monsters arrived, then we headed out of the building.

Yep.

Work wasn't in my office.

Everyone took their money and belongings with them. We went to a near bank and I made all the changes in their currency to make them dollars. We had agreed that every 'Gold' would be a dollar. 1 for 1. (I remembered a song again. I shouldn't be talking about my whole playlist)

They ended up with a good amount of money. Well, a lot. Some of them had sold their houses in the Underground, so they had even more money. Now, who bought their houses? God knows- that's the answer.

So some of them bought a house. Like, today. This totally surprised me, considering how much time I spent searching for a new place to live, that it's a small apartment. And now they have houses. HOUSES, FOR GOD'S SAKE!

Calm the fuck down, (Y/N) (L/N).

...(L/N).

That kinda reminded me about my conversation with Sans. I glanced down at him and saw that he was talking to an excited Papyrus.

"You look happy" I bluntly said, facing towards him. I froze but quickly relaxed, watching his smile growing bigger.

"aren't i always happy?" he answered, winking an... "eye".

"I mean, for real" I muttered, but I was conscious that he heard me since he stared at me in shock "Shit, I'm sorr-"

"you could say i feel happier. i, after a long time, have a bit of hope about the future-"

"YES HUMAN!" Papyrus shouted, smiling excitingly "SANS HAS BEEN DOING GREAT! HE'S BEEN WAY MORE POSITIVE SINCE YOU SHOWED UP, AND THAT'S A HUGE PROGRESS!"

He isn't that positive, huh? We may be really similar, then.

I could see why he was more positive, though; he got a house for his family, and that feeling is simply amazing. Well... I suppose it must be incredible. I haven't bought a familiar house, but when I got the keys to my apartment, it sure felt great. It must feel similar, if not better.

But he was eager about something else as well, noticing the look he gave to a bookstore. That really caught me off guard, not seeing him as the type to read a lot. Maybe I shouldn't be judging the poor guy just yet. He seems nice to this point, and that's it.

We finished our journey at the new and huge house of the Dreemurr family, everyone feeling like little kids. And with everyone, I include myself. I honestly forgot my problems for a bit and I was hoping to see how these guys reached their dreams eventually.

It's just a matter of time.

"How about if you stay as well, (Y/N)?" Frisk asked with a smile, snapping me back at reality. Wait, WHAT?!

"S-stay?!" I asked amazed, not believing what my ears were hearing. Why would they want me to stay?!

"YEAH! WE WILL HAVE A HUGE SLEEPOVER IN WHICH EVERYONE WILL PARTICIPATE!" Papyrus exclaimed, eyeing Sans and Dr. Gaster there for a second.

"Uh... I don't know..." I started, trying to dismiss the topic. And as expected, I failed.

"it's really late now, kiddo. from what you have told me, it's not good to leave at this time. less if you're a girl" Sans cleverly argued, using my words of that telephonic conversation.

Goddang it, Sans.

"...are you sure?"

"totally"

"Well, if you really want me here..."

Everyone smiled, even that freaking flower (though I bet he won't admit it). I felt a nostalgic wave hit me, but I hold the tears.

You can always cry at night, (Y/N)...

Except that tonight you can't, if you plan to stay.

Shit. If I had grabbed along my pills, it would have been easier. Hopefully, this so-called sleepover would last until morning. Maybe then I'll pass out.

That means no coffee, though.

Shit.

However, it wasn't as bad as I thought. All of them were super nice, and even shy Napstablook opened up once in a while. I felt really welcomed by most of them, making jokes and thanking me for what I've done.

Even if it was really nothing.

"So (Y/N)..." The sassy robot asked, making a fake hum of curiosity... that makes me feel curious as well. "How is your love life, darling?"

I don't think I should tell this guy I'm lonely as fuck...

"Pretty much dead, honestly" I simply answered, trying not to get into details.

"Oh. Did a bastard just left you?"

I don't think I should tell this guy I've always been lonely as fuck.

"Eh... sure"

"That didn't sound too believable, (Y/N)!" Frisk pouted, getting into the conversation without anyone minding her opinion.

...that was rude.

"YES HUMAN! YOU DIDN'T SOUND TOO CONVINCING!" Papyrus exclaimed, making my heart skip a beat for a second at how loud his voice is. I need to get used to this. "...OR DO YOU RATHER NOT TALK ABOUT IT?"

It would have been useless if I lied, knowing how little experienced I am about the topic. They would find out sooner or later that I was a fat ass liar, just trying to fit in and failing miserably. So instead of taking that risk, I decided to take another.

"Actually... my love life has always been dead..."

Mettaton almost choked in the glass of... an unknown drink he was... drinking?

How does he fucking drink, though?

"Darling, what the hell?!" He exclaimed with a remarkable tone of indignity in his voice, gaining the attention of the others in the room... who weren't paying attention before. Oh my god, why?! "We need to get you a date! Like, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Eh... what about no?" I answered, trying my best to escape. And, as expected...

I failed.

"WHAT ABOUT YESSSSSS??????????????????????????" He snapped back annoyingly, making me feel like the stupidest person on Earth. Maybe I would have really lied if I knew he would be like this about my non-existent love life.

"Me-mettaton" Alphys intervened, with an instant look of regret after spitting out that word. Please save me. "I do-don't think you should judge her that easily. I mean, everyone has their reasons. I bet she does as well"

"...fine!" He sassily exclaimed, faking their annoyance "Just don't say that I, an expert in love lives, didn't try to help!"

ohmygodthankyou

"...sure thing, Mettaton" I sighed, mostly in relief "Sure thing"

And so the night continued, not without me being able to avoid all their questions. I was okay with telling them about the surface, but my life... now that's another thing. People say I should be proud of what I've done, either in school and work, but it's hard for me to see it that way. And so my pride is substituted by doubts and insecurity, feeling not good enough. Because maybe if I tell them too much about me, they would not like me anymore (if they ever did, in the first place). And even if it's really selfish, I enjoyed their company more than anything in ages.

And I didn't want it to stop.

My time there was pleasant until it was 1 am. Frisk and Papyrus were seemingly tired, and Sans added that "his brother would get cranky without his bed story" or something like that. I felt a rush of panic hit me like a brick, realizing that it would be impossible for me to sleep at this hour.

And knowing that I couldn't do my nightly shenanigans made me feel worse.

Panic, then, was starting to get mixed up with anxiety, while the others were discussing who should get the couch-

wait a minute.

"Uh... I can sleep on the couch if you want me to" I interrupted, hoping that this would be a good idea.

A lot of the people arguing told me countless times I shouldn't take the couch since I was "the guest", but my insistence and my insecurities were way stronger than all of their goodwill combined.

Or maybe not, but the point is that I won.

Everyone went to sleep, some of them even hugged me before leading to their temporary rooms. I smiled, feeling happy...

Wow. Never thought I would use that word again.

Don't get me wrong, my life it's not that shitty. I mean, if we get ourselves more reasonable, at least I'm not in the middle of nothing dying from starvation and from having a fucked-up mind. That's something I should really feel thankful for, except for that last part, since my mind it's actually a huge mess.

Still, I can't consider myself being happy. Or more like... satisfied? Yeah, that must be. I've always been exigent with myself, feeling the pressure of keeping people's expectations high. I don't want to fail them. I don't want them to see me how I see myself. That's why I smile, I laugh and even cry when I don't want to.

To feel more human.

To feel sane.

To keep moving on.

Because I know that other people might need my help in, well, anything! I just can't give up if people in worse situations haven't. That would just make me look and feel worse.

But it's really worth living just for the others and not for myself?

I mean, it's not like I'm completely selfless. I consider myself really selfish at some points. Because I also do things to keep myself sane, to keep myself out of trouble, and hell, to even keep myself out from the death list.

I'm scared of death, no doubt about it. I'm scared of letting go before I find someone that truly cares about me...

...maybe I should listen to Mettaton. But a broken heart would be unbearable to me. Falling in love is a risk I can't take, less if I'm in this state.

I mean, look at me! I've been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and a high fucking IQ which I'm not proud of at all! I question reality often, I doubt how capable I am to do even the simplest of tasks, and I can't even establish a normal conversation without freaking out! I sometimes even ask myself if I don't have schizophrenia, for God's sake!

My mind went blank when I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. That warm and familiar feeling made me want to scream and punch a fucking mirror again. I contained myself, though, when I see in the darkness the green couch I was laying on.

I couldn't make them worry about me.

I just couldn't.

And so I softly removed the tears from my face and shut my eyes, not before noticing a blanket that, as far as I could remember, I never grabbed...

#sans x reader #more than i thought fanfiction #more than i thought #chapter 8 #sans #x reader #undertale

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iamnathannah · 6 years ago

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So...I got this review on ff-net for "Longing" this morning. Usually I love reviews because they give me encouragement...this ain't one of them, though.

If you don't want to read through it, in summary...

"Great story, but it seems like you hate men and the direction of society. Why isn't Dean just the bland fella presented in the show? Why is he violent and a cheating asshole who's rich; that's Logan y'know? Love the story as I said and Madeline and Louise are great, but I'm done with it."

Yeah, a lot to unpack here if you're not in the GG fandom like I've been since near the beginning, along with the basic concept of fanfiction.

"It's a well-written story with good characterisation of Rory and Paris but...there's a lot of anger in it."

When I started the story in 2003, the sky was the limit, and Paris and Rory were on their way to great lives bereft of any issues with men and so much potential for women in the world. Fast-forward to 2019...where we have a lying cheat of an asshole in the White House, merely disagreeing with a man is enough to bury your Twitter mentions in hate, and LGBTQ+ rights are being attacked at every turn.

Then we have the aftermath of AYITL, which dynamited Rory's future into being completely dependent on men (aka Logan), took away her entire drive and reason for being, and left her as a homewrecker having a kid she probably never wanted. And Paris is in a loveless marriage with a completely underwritten Doyle whose character traits went from 'being a loving and supporting boyfriend to a neurotic Jewish girl with the entire world upon her shoulders' to 'wink-wink Danny Strong writes Empire and Oscar-winners; Doyle can't raise kids let's just write that Doyle's that now since we threw out the Doyle notebook in our post-S6 burning of all our character notes'.

Yeah, over sixteen years, you tend to write for your reality, and the reality right now? Totally sucks.

"Some of it seems to be directed at society, some of it at the show, with a disproportionate amount of it being taken out on mostly male characters who bear only a passing resemblance to their on screen portrayal..."

Once again...AYITL hasn't aged well. Society hates journalists. It hates driven women (see my last post taking down that asshole who hates Brie Larson). Males are pretty damned well responsible for most of it. And I haven't had the best male figures of my life and have been mostly around women. I'm probably not going to write a positive view of some men; it's bias, and I own up to it here.

And yeah, my men don't match up to how they are on screen. Because, fanfiction is...

'Fiction written by a fan of, and featuring characters from, a particular TV series, movie, etc.'

Speaking of which...

"...Which seems to have got worse as I suspect you liked the show less and less."

You're reading my story. A Gilmore Girls fanfiction. My Twitter bio declares that I've loved it a decade and a half before the Gilmore Guys started their podcast. A show where I literally follow nearly main actor on the series into every future project they've had and watched loyally, for the most part. I buy every movie the girls have been in. Fanfiction isn't defined as 'a random person writing hate screeds against a particular TV series, movie, etc.'. You're not going to ever see me write even a drabble about how much Kevin Can Wait should be called Kevin Can Burn In Hell Because He's a Ghoulish Sexist Fuckface Who Celebrated His Wife's Death To Move On With His Former Hot Wife From Another Show.

Still love Gilmore Girls in full. But being a fan doesn't mean I have to like every single decision the writers and ASP ever made.

That is the fun of fanfiction. If I disagree with canon...I can disregard it, in part, or in full. I have never been able to find a fellow fan that agreed with every plot point the show has ever made. I hope I never will, because that's definitely not why anyone should ever be a fan of the show.

And excuse my language here...but I've written over a MILLION WORDS for this story. 27 chapters have been posted. I have an eventual endgame planned for the story that has been in my mind since the day I posted chapter one. Why the fuck would I write a million words about something I hate?!

"Dean has gone from a good first boyfriend who just wasn't right for Rory long-term to a violent thief who cheated on Rory throughout their relationship and never loved her anyway. And now, incredibly, seems to be just another entitled rich kid? It feels like you really want to bash on Logan but can't find a way to have him in the story, so you've turned Dean into him."

Oh reviewer...dear reviewer...oh, you don't know what you've gotten yourself into.

I have ALWAYS hated Dean. Always. Since January 2001 when I caught up on the backlog of episodes I missed because I only started watching during the two back-to-back night Christmas episodes, the only positive thought I've been able to spare for him was that Jared Padalecki (no attacks on him here, just the character) got a good living playing a completely underwritten bore who has nothing redeeming going on and a backstory that I would call 'existent'.

The show claims he's from the south side of Chicago in a neighborhood near the Dan Ryan that has 5% white people going by the zip code of his mail from there (the show's basic research department blew it there). Most white people from Chicago are in the Gold Coast, the northwest suburbs, or the North Shore. I have been adjacent to the Chicago market my whole life. He's from the North Shore, no question, judging from how his parents seem to have good enough wealth and how every white guy Chicago teenager story is drawn from a kid from the North Shore.

He literally punched Jess out three times!

He made Rory fear violence for merely losing a bracelet he gave her and for being near Tristan for a school function (LOL, Dristan...that burn still causes me to laugh at inappropriate times about how dumb it was, and I'm sure Tristan has it as one of his constant bon mots).

He called her home phone nearly a hundred times a day and drove her to the edge of madness with a 'must watch every day' love of Lord of the Rings that compares unfavorably to my four year-old nephew only loving Frozen, PJ Masks and Daniel Tiger. That isn't anyone any person has to tolerate in a relationship.

Dean’s only reaction to Rory trying to prove a point with her Donna Reed night was just she looked hot and he learned nothing about how women hate being confined to being solely homemakers and sexual receptacles.

He dumped her because she didn’t say “I Love You” like it was the goddamned bonus round in Wheel of Fortune and she didn’t get the solution out before the buzzer.

Dean’s shambles of a gift, that piece of shit car? It almost killed Rory and Jess. It looked like it didn’t have seatbelts. I’m surprised we didn’t get an episode where Dean ended up homeless because Richard sued his cheap ass into the fucking ground.

He decided to make her go back to him in front of the entrance of Chilton, where Rory would have looked like the biggest b***h in history if she didn’t return an ‘I love you’, and goddamned well knew it. Any good person would have done this in fucking private, like a considerate person.

He never respected the Chilton side of her life. At all. If it was up to him, he would’ve made up a bomb threat and had his friend imitate Rory’s voice to get her kicked out of the school she spent her young life trying to get into. If it was up to him, Harvard would have never even been a possibility, and if not for Jess coming in, he would have intimidated her into pushing off her dream entirely to stay in the kitchen.

His origin story was never mentioned outside 'he moved from Chicago and had a girlfriend in the past, Beth'. Fanfiction allows you to examine the holes in stories and go from there, and I just worked with them because the thing with moves to new locales? You can have a brand new image with people, and they will never know what you did in your old place. Judging by his violent/stalkerish tendencies, he has a pretty good case for having Imposter Syndrome that eventually reset itself in the Hollow.

Over time he went from a guy who seemed to like good literature to hyperfocusing on the 'it' media property of the time. Likely he started out liking fine literature, but once he fell in with the imbeciles of his friend group in the Hollow, that proved to be a lie.

He had a thing about being close to Lorelai. So much that around that time, there were so many more people shipping Lorelai/Dean than Rory/Dean as a romantic couple. If not for his later flanderization, that fangroup would still be strong.

HE CHEATED ON HIS WIFE!

**HE. CHEATED. ON. HIS. WIFE!

***HE! CHEATED! ON! HIS! WIFE!

****And outside losing his home and some stuff being damaged (rightfully fucking so) by Lindsay, both her and Rory took all the brunt of the damage his wandering dick did between all of them. Lindsay was guilted by her parents for checking out on her marriage and was never heard from again (I assume she's in a convent now because ASP's writing outside of Lorelai and Rory [or Paris, Sookie and Lane on a day she wasn't angry at the world for not pressing her hat right] for women was 'they are the enemy'). Rory had to find her way back to her old self (and she never did going by ending up with Logan). Dean? Welp, good thing "Supernatural" started at that time to save ASP the bother of having to explain what a dumbass Dean was.

*****Justice for Lindsay Lister! I hope she didn't go to a convent, but flipped off her parents, squealed out of town and is killing it in a career where she's respected, with a partner who loves her deeply.

The scene where he cornered Rory into sex in her house and said he didn’t love Lindsay was sexual assault and gaslighting. ASP intended it to be romantic, but instead created a nightmare scene that would be completely passe in a Lifetime movie. Rory’s first time was her being forced to give up her sexual agency for the pleasure of only Dean. And it’s exactly why the Paris/Rory scene I wrote on the yoga mats was intended to be the exact reverse of that trash.

He hoped to get ahead in life on a hockey scholarship. That's...not a life plan. And he paid for it by being stuck doing construction.

He hated Paris. He hated that Rory had her as a friend. He wanted a life with Rory that never involved Paris.

Paris is a strong-ass lady for daring to step to him and lie through her teeth about wanting Jess to stop the Great Stars Hollow Homicide of 2002 By The Coward Dean Forrester from ever being a thing.

LOL Logan is Tristan Lite and always will be.

About ten chapters back I mentioned how the girls consider Logan terrible already from a distance based on the New York media scene. Trust me, he's in this story (he may be a little more in this story later).

"There is a lot to recommend in this, like the slow burn set-up (although you've made up for it since!)..."

#backhandedcompliment (Also, what's to recommend? Love to know what you did like, but you spent all that time saying 'I'm mean to men', so I guess you ran out of time on that)

"...and turning Madeleine and Louise into three-dimensional characters..."

You sent me a flame, but didn't expand on what you loved about this? Thanks for the lack of feedback (and for misspelling Madeline’s name).

"But there are several reasons why it's not been an easy read so I won't be hanging out for an update, I'm afraid."

You basically said that you consider me a man-hater and that because I choose to have the ladies present their views in the story, you don't like that I'm drawing real life into their motives, mores and decisions. And you said I hated the show when most of my friend circle was formed through bonding through it, and we still love it, even if we think Rory needed to do better in life and ASP's writing weakened as each season went on.

I don't need readers like you, seriously. There are many other Rory/Paris stories you can read out there. As I have said in many other flame responses;

I am not the be-all end-all of Paris/Rory fic. PLEASE, read other writers. Enjoy their stuff. But don't whine at me or them because we choose to show that even in fictional worlds, people are against LGBTQ+ issues and people. We're not going to get equality by sugar-coating or whitewashing our way past those issues, and if you can't handle what I consider light attacks against entitled men, you should probably find something else to read.

#longing #paris x rory #review #review rant #fanfiction rant #gilmore girls #longing with a cherry tomato on top

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