#anyway so frustrating that this tour had space available until literally this evening

[butleroftoast]

I’ve been planning a trip to Australia for a while, with my eye on a particular tour.

Today I cleared it all with everyone I needed to at work, so I’m good to go!

...except the tour I was looking at is now fully booked, and all the others designed for solo travellers are too long, the wrong dates, or spend a lot of time and travel on things I’m not interested in.

Do I trust the itinerary I subsequently designed on my own and hope I don’t run into any issues with transportation? Or do I admit defeat?

[blkmxrvel]

Hotel Mishaps

Pairing: brie larson x fem!reader

Words: 3k [ 3,014 ]

Request:  There’s only one bed! Ft Brie Larson and a Press Tour!

Summary: press tour has got you losing your mind, patience and self control. you blame your best friend, brie, for it all. 

Warnings: sexual themes! gets hot and steamy but no full fledged smut.

A/N: i tried my best, i really did. i hope you guys like it!! i needed something to get me back into the grove and take a hit at my requests so, here we go! look how fucking beautiful she is literally the love of my damn life. 

You sighed as you fell back onto the hotel bed, your body relaxing as you hit the soft mattress. You closed your eyes for a moment, allowing yourself to de-stress a little bit. And by deep stress, I clearly mean nap. You threw your forearm over your head to block out the sun, and slightly turned so that you were laying on your side. You continued to let your breathing slow, and your muscles relax. You were so close to sleeping when your best friend came barging into the room. 

“Oh, my God!” Brie groaned as she trudged through the hotel room, immediately flinging her jacket on a nearby chair. “Today was absolutely impossible! I’m just so glad that it’s over,”

You let out a sigh, knowing that you weren’t going to get any sleep anytime soon. Sitting up with your eyes still closed, you rolled your shoulders back, hopefully alleviating some of the tension building in them. 

“Yeah, then we gotta do it all over again tomorrow, and then the days after that for the next 3 months.�� You rubbed your hands over your facing, holding them there as you willed yourself to try and not fall asleep. 

You and Brie were best friends, as well as co-stars on this huge blockbuster movie. Of course, with every high anticipated movie, comes week after week of grueling press tours trying to promote it. 

Answering the same exact questions everyday, and having to have the same fake smile  plastered on your face was getting old really quickly. You weren’t really sure why you had to do the Press anyways. It wasn’t like the movie was struggling to pick up interest, and a large crowd wasn’t promising. It was quite the opposite actually. From the day the movie was announced there has been nonstop talk; it was almost positive that each box office would be bustling on premiere night, press tour or not. 

Either way, it’s not like you have much choice in the matter. A contract is a contract. And it wasn’t that you weren’t stoked. You were having an absolute blast traveling the world and getting to brag about your work, with your best friend at that. It was more so of how taxing it was, physically, mentally, and sexually. 

But things had to get done the way they have to get done. 

Opening your eyes, your jaw nearly fell to the floor. Brie was standing in front of you, back towards you. And that’s all it was. She was completely naked as she was trying to find her pajamas. 

“Can you pass me my towel? It should be on the bed.” You snapped out of your trance, muttering a ‘yeah sure’ and tossing the towel at your best friend. You tried your hardest not to steal another glance at your naked best friend. For some reason that you didn’t dare try to understand, Brie has just been making your body ignite in just the smallest of ways. Whether it was her hand on your waist when you were hugging, the way her jaw clenched when an interviewer asked her a particularly dumb question, or the way her voice rasped when she told you to go fuck yourself when you wake her up. 

Either way, for the past week, there has been a  dam growing at your core waiting to blow. You had blamed it on the Press Tour, saying that stress filled work hours as well as being with someone your comfortable with literally all day everyday was the reason for your constant arousal. But even after the 3 day break you had, the next time you saw Brie, clad her in muscle tank and sweatpants, you were ready to risk it all for the simple feeling of her lips on your neck. It had to stop, you knew it did. You have 3 more weeks of Press, and  you couldn’t spend them thirsting over your best friend.

You prayed to whatever, whoever out there that you would be able to make it through these next few weeks cool, calm and composed. 

It looks like you didn’t pray hard enough, because when you and Brie arrived at your next hotel, you were in for a loop. For some reason, there weren’t separate rooms booked for you and Brie, meaning that you needed to share one for the next few days. 

There wasn’t anything too bad about that. You and Brie do live together back in Los Angeles. So you knew how to get through your night in the same room. You also knew how to release the building pressure inside of you with anyone noticing, so you weren’t worrying about that either. 

That day though, Brie had just been turning you on to no end. She didn’t know it of course, but the way she smiled at you and the way her dress hugged her body in all the right places had you screaming for mercy. Internally of course. But that was all minor stuff, you could handle those turn ons. 

What you couldn’t handle however was the way veins popped out of Brie’s neck when some random idiot tried to grab your ass. The way her eyebrows rose and the vice grip she had on the man’s hand.

Can she put a baby in me?

How her jawline became more defined than it already is, and the way her eyes instantly darkened. You….You couldn’t handle that. 

Yes, Brie. Let everyone know that only you are able to smack my ass. Let everyone know that actually. Please and thank you. 

Okay, maybe your hormones were getting the best of you. But it did kinda suck that you had to platonically share a room with Brie when all you wanted to do was sleep with Brie ...if you know what I mean. 

But that’s okay, space was good. You needed as much space as possible to keep your arousal at bay, and make it through these next few days. Space was going to be a life saver. 

Until…..there wasn’t any more space. 

“So….” Brie uttered when she met you at the elevator. “It seems like the hotel messed up again, because there’s only one bed. So we’re going to have to share one.” What?

On the outside, you kept your cool, calm and relaxed composure, telling Brie that it was no big deal. You two had shared plenty of beds when  you were younger, and sometimes had to, like now. But back then, you weren’t itching to climb Brie like a tree. 

On the inside, you were a wreck, because how the fuck were you going to make it through your horny nights with Brie right next to you? What were  you supposed to do? You couldn’t silently rub one out with your best friend in the same bed as you, whether she’s the cause or not. And you couldn’t tell Brie how you were feeling, that would make things too weird. You definitely did not want to spend another night tense and orgasmless, but it looks like you were going to have to. 

You couldn’t wait for this Press Tour to be over. 

--

You thought that maybe after a few hours, your feelings would subside and you would be able to function like a normal human being. But you were wrong. Laying in the bed in the pitch black room, Brie right next to you with her heavy breaths hitting your ear, you were more on edge than before. 

Her warm body was only inches from yours in the king size bed. You could feel the warmth radiating from her body, going straight down and warming your core even more. You were aware of every single, grumbled, whine, and shift she made. It was driving you crazy.

You were shifting every five minutes, 10 at most, clenching your legs together in hopes that the rampant throbbing in your clit would just stop. But to no avail. You shifted one last time, letting out a frustrated groan, heart stopping when you heard moving from beside you. 

“Y/N/N? You alright?” 

Fuck. All you heard was rasp in Brie’s unused voice, and all you felt was a pool of wetness brewing in between your thighs. 

You inhaled a deep, shaky breath, willing yourself to sound normal. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Thank God you were facing away from her, bo way were you going to let her see your face. No way could you handle seeing her face without thinking about how much you wanted to ride it. 

“You sure?” You felt her place her hand on your hip. Her cold (yet oddly warm) hand on your bare, exposed hip. You couldn’t help but let out a moan at that. You tensed up and moved as far away from Brie as possible without falling off the bed. We needed as little embarrassment in one night as possible. 

Brie sat up over you and leaned on her hand, staring down at you curiously. 

“Did you…..” She hesitated. “Y/N did you have a wet dream?” Of course Brie would ask a question like that, she was your best friend. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for you two to share stories of your erotic dreams. Best friend do that kind of stuff, that’s why she asked, It wasn’t because Brie secretly hope that dream wet was about her. Most definitely wasn’t because she had wet dreams about you, often.

You decided to ride this one out, Brie had given you a good way out and like hell  you weren’t going to take it and run with it.

“Mhm.” You cleared your voice a bit as it went too high pitched, and Brie just looked at you. 

Something wasn’t right. Brie squinted her eyes. She knew your well enough to know that your voice gets high pitched when you were lying. She just couldn’t believe that you, of all people would hide something from her. But she wasn’t about to let it go either. 

Brie gripped your hips and flipped you on you back, the spontaneity taking you by surprise. The sheer force and speed of your best friends actions caused you to moan, albeit softly. 

“That’s a lie.” Brie sat up fully now, her eyes examining youts. “You don’t look like you just woke up, you like wide awake actually. And alert.” She observed you, your mind going blank and the way her eyes raked down your body. 

“And your chest is moving fast. Your hands are clammy and your forehead is sweating. Did you just masturbate?” Brie’s stomach flipped and a jolt went to her core at the thought. 

Your eyes went wide as you covered your face and let out a giggle. “Of course I didn’t masturbate, especially not with you in the same bed.” Brie let out a breath. Whether that was a breath of relief or disappointment, she wasn’t sure. 

“Then what’s wrong?” She moved to straddle your hips, something she always did when she was figuring you out. Best friend style...maybe. 

But with her over top of you, warm center placed directly on your stomach, you tensed. “There was a stutter in Brie’s movements; and if you weren’t mistaken you felt her hips move the slightest, right before she let out in suspicious, absolutely fake cough.

Did she ...? Does she…..?

���Because you literally moaned twice when all I did was do what I always do. What’s up?” She whined. “We’re supposed to tell each other everything.”

“It’s nothing, Brie. Just let’s go back to sleep.”  You tried to slow your breathing with your hands covering your face, waiting for Brie to get off of you.

Brie just stayed where she was, staring at you and analyzing this past week’s events. Your actions throughout the entire tour. You were jumpy around her, stuttering and flustered way more than usual. You didn’t cuddle her or hug her like you usually did.  You barely looked her in the eye, and when you did your eyes would widen and you’d duck away. 

Brie figured that this Press tour was just getting to you. That since it was your first for a really big movie, you were just slowly succumbing to all the pressure. But maybe...maybe she was wrong. 

“Y/N.” Brie’s voice made your body tense up and you hated how Brie probably felt it. Your cover was up, you were sure of it. 

“... Y/N …” She sighed more softly when you didn’t answer. She pried your hands from your face, pinning them next to your head. Her face was inches from yours. Your eyes gazed into Brie’s, moving frantically around them. 

“Brie? What are you doing?” 

“Can I kiss you?” Her eyebrow raised up, and as you looked into her eyes you saw a flash of regret and guilt in them. What was she doing? What was happening. And this was not a joke, you knew that. Brie’s eyes kept flickering from yours to your lips, and she bit her lips as she did so. She was serious. This was not a joke and you were losing your mind. 

“You want to kiss me?” 

Brie chuckled, her smiling eyes grinning at yours. “Of course, I do. Can I?” You searched Brie’s entire face for anything that would indicate this is a joke, that she was going to regret this in the morning. When you saw nothing of the sort, only your hopeful best friend biting her lip nervously, you nodded your head. 

You had countless visions about what it would be like if you ever got the chance to kiss Brie. You had dreams, both day and night about how her lips would feel against yours, how the breath expelled from your nose would hit your cheek just right. You figured you had prepared yourself for all of that, but clearly you didn’t prepare yourself for the moaned that slipped out of her throat when she finally kissed you. 

Your eyes fluttered shut and you let out a sigh, Brie’s moans going right to your core. She let your hands go, instead placing her own on your sides, gripping lightly as she swiped her tongue over your lip. Of course you opened your mouth. 

You didn’t mean for the moan to slip when her tongue swirled over yours. And you most definitely didn’t mean for it to be that loud. Brie broke apart from you, panting heavy with glistening lips. You thought that was it, that your lack of control of your hormones had ruined it all. 

Brie’s breath was shaky as she stared down at you.  She didn’t say anything, do anything, just stared at you with an indecipherable look on her face. 

“Brie?” 

She still didn’t say anything. She do something this time though, smashing her lips back on yours in a kiss that was sure to bruise. Her hands slipped under the loose fabric of your shirt, running up along your sides and across your stomach. You let out another moan at the feeling of her calloused hands on your soft skin. You let out another when you felt Brie grind her pussy just right on the lower half of your stomach, just inches away from where you wanted her most. 

“What has been bothering you all week, Y/N?” She disconnected your lips again to trail sloppy, wet kisses down your face and to your neck, where her lips made themselves home, sucking and biting bruises. 

“Don’t act like you don’t know, Brie.” You sighed out as her teeth clamped down particularly harsh on your pulse point. Your hips jolted up,some of the pressure relieving against Brie, but it wasn’t enough. 

“And what if I don’t?” You could feel her smile against your chest, the cool air abusing the bruises on your chest making you shiver. 

“Then I guess you just won’t ever know.” She chuckled, tugging on your shirt and looking up at you, asking for permission. You nodded as fast as you could, arching your body so she could take it off. 

Once she did, she got back to work again, her hands gripping over your breast and she placed delicate kisses along your chest. Her hands occupied themselves well, massaging and gripping them before her fingers decided you twist and pull your nipples. 

Burst after burst of energy was being sent straight to your core, the wetness in between your legs extremely uncomfortable. Your clit throbbed with no restraint as Brie took of those nipples into her mouth, her fingernails scratching over the other. 

“God.” You threw your head back and tangled your own fingers in Brie’s hair. “That feels good.” 

“Mhm?” Brie hummed, her mouth now around your other nipple. “How good?” She let it go with a pop, kissing her way back up to your lips. 

“Super good.” You moaned again when she pressed her lips against yours. You gripped her sides this time, pulling her impossibly closer to you, your lips moving with hers. 

“Do you want me to fuck you?” Brie mumbled against your lips, hands still playing with your breasts. “Is that what’s been bothering you all this time?” 

You nodded, helplessly. You pushed up against her, not wanting to speak with words, only with your body. You wanted her to fuck you, and you wanted her to do it now. 

Thankfully, Brie got the message. Because she broke away from your lips again, kissing right down your body. She didn’t failed to leave a trail of bruises that would take a little bit of time covering up. 

She tugged down your shorts and panties in one fell swoop, kissing along your inner sides, and blowing cool air on your pussy when she reached the top. You threw your head back again, moaning in relief as your felt her lips wrap around your clit. You threaded your fingers in her hair as she licked stripes through your folds. And you tugged her hair when you felt her tongue swirl over your clit before sucking again. 

You were thankful for press tours, and even more thankful for hotel mishaps.

[satorisa]

Lift the Veil - Chapter 14:  Thnks fr th Mmrs

Rating: T

Summary: After living in Tokyo for the past six years, she decides to head back to Azumano to escape the big city. However, she now has to face everything that she tried to flee from all those years ago. How exactly will she fare when the pages of a long forgotten book start turning once more?

Alternate links for reading available in my description! (Except for on ff.net rn since I’m having technical difficulties uploading it onto there.)

What better way to ring in the new year than with yet another Lift the Veil chapter! Here’s to (almost) new beginnings for our two main characters.

We are one, I repeat, one chapter away from the next arc of this story! So stay tuned for the tonal shift this story will take once we get there!

Happy readings, ya’ll!

Chapter 14 – Thnks fr th Mmrs

And I want these words to make things right, but it’s the wrongs that make the words come to life.

Alone. In my apartment. With way too much food for me to finish without puking it all up, too much alcohol for me to be around in such an emotionally precarious state, and an overwhelming understanding that I shouldn’t be in this situation any longer than I need to be.

I called Ritsuko first, half hoping she would pick up and half hoping she wouldn’t. She answered after the second ring.

“Hey, Risa! I thought you were busy with Riku and Daisuke’s return.”

“I was.”

“Your ‘was’ is worrying me.”

I take a deep breath. “Can you come by? Please.”

“Yeah! Yeah—let me just finish up something first, and I’ll head over as soon as I can. Can you hang in there until then?”

“I’ll try.”

“Okay, Risa, now you’re really worrying me.” I heard movement from her line. “Do you need me to bring you anything?”

“Just empty Tupperware. Please take home some of the food I have here.”

“Gotcha. Just wait for me, alright?”

“Alrighty. Thank you.”

“Always, hun.”

We hung up, and I stared at my phone. Ritsuko would be enough, right? I scrolled through my contacts until I saw Takeshi’s name. Did I need him over? Could he even be over? And what about Akane? Would she—

ACHOO.

The sneeze cut my deliberations short as I accidentally pressed the button to call him. And, after my round of sneezes ended, I heard a faint voice blessing me from my phone. I brought it to my ear, realizing it’d be too late to hang up now.

“Hey, Boss, are you feeling alright?” he asked with genuine concern.

The words rolled around in my head, like bingo balls bouncing around in their cage. I could say yes, effectively putting an end to this conversation and just dump everything onto Ritsuko. Takeshi would tease me for days about this call, but—

“No. I’m not.”

There was silence until I heard a muffled voice that sounded too high to belong to Takeshi. Akane?

“Akane’s asking if you need anything.”

“Just bring some empty containers. I have too much food here. ”

“Awesome!” I hear noise muffling the line.  “I’ll be on my way soon.”

“You don’t—”

“Nope. Nu-uh. I don’t want to hear it, Risa. I’m going to be over soon, and there’s nothing you can do about it, okay?”

“…okay.”

“Okay? Good. I’ll see you in a bit.”

He hung up, and I looked at my phone resting in my lap. Ritsuko and Takeshi were heading to my apartment to comfort me after Riku blew up because she found out about Satoshi. In other words, the world was going to explode in my face, and there was nothing I could do about it.

If I could help it, I wouldn’t tell them, but the secret was out. Knowing Riku, she’d intentionally blab about it until she finally came to terms with it. Which probably won’t be until after she’s razed Azumano to cinders. Besides, I’d rather they hear this from me than her. Better from the primary source, after all.

Dammit, Kazama. I really didn’t want to cross this bridge this soon. (Hopefully, this won’t bring that ugly mug of his back to Azumano again, either.)

Some time had passed as I sat there, unmoving, unable to process anything, slowly decaying with each breath I took until I heard them. They didn’t need to ring my doorbell. Ritsuko and Takeshi’s angry voices carried through the walls of my living room.

I sighed before getting up to open the door. And, sure enough, I peeked out into the hallway to see them a couple of units down. I glared.

“You guys better get in here before I throw out all my food.”

“This is your fault, Fukuda!” Takeshi screamed.

“My fault? Let me remind you that—”

I closed my door, mentally readying myself for any potential noise complaints as I returned to my spot on the sofa. When I heard them finally knock on my door, preluded by sweet silence, I let them in.

“Friendly reminder that I do have neighbors so please, for the love of God, keep it down. Thank you!”

“Yes ma’am!”

Ritsuko, still having not seen my place, gave herself a tour while Takeshi stood by the food, silently deliberating on what he’d take back with him.

“Sorry I couldn’t help you move in!” Ritsuko called from my bedroom.

“No worries! How was your business trip to Sapporo?”

“Honestly? I’d rather have suffered at the hands of moving stress than what I dealt with there.”

“Sorry to hear that.”

Ritsuko eventually finished and closed my bedroom door behind her. She sat on the sofa, and Takeshi joined her on the opposite end. They looked up at me, expecting and scrutinizing, and I sat down in the space between them to keep them from fighting.

I felt my arms start to shake once I realized that there was no turning back once from this.

“So, what’s up?” Ritsuko asked.

“Just…give me a bit.”

She nodded as I took a couple of deep breaths to calm myself down. They didn’t really help though; they were only delaying the inevitable.

 I took one last deep breath.

“…I was Hiwatari’s friend with benefits in high school. And he ghosted me a month before we graduated.”

They balked. Ritsuko quickly regained her composure, but Takeshi just looked like the world had suddenly turned upside down.

“I know we all had our suspicions, but…” Ritsuko couldn’t continue.

“Holy shit. Holy shit.” Takeshi paused. “This is what you were keeping from us? I knew it was bad because Satoshi was somehow always very specific yet very vague but—oh my god.”

“Who else knows?” Ritsuko asked.

“Some of the adults managed to piece it together, and I thought that Hiwatari-san kept it to himself like me…until he told me that Daisuke found out.”

Ritsuko looked at me in horror. “Oh no.”

“So guess who told Riku while being drunk out of their mind on their trip to Zurich?”

“No.”

“Yup.”

Takeshi groaned. “Daisuke, buddy, I love you, but how the hell could you pull a Satoshi with the last person on Earth you should’ve blabbed it to?”

“’Pull a Satoshi?’ What the hell do you mean by that?”

“Fukuda, I don’t know if you’ve had the—ah—displeasure of drinking with Satoshi, so let’s just say that he has no filter when he’s gone. One time, he said…er…”

“’Er?’” Ritsuko repeated.

Takeshi looked at me. “I don’t know if I can share this.”

“After Risa’s statement? You could literally tell me the world is ending tomorrow, and it would still pale in comparison.”

Takeshi bit his lip. “Well, since it involved Risa, I suppose I can. Just brace yourself. Please.” He then directed his attention towards Ritsuko. “You didn’t hear this from me, Fukuda.”

“Just. Spit. It. Out.”

“Risa, um, I don’t know if he told you this already, but he was practically in love with you in high school.”

Ritsuko gasped. “What?”

“Oh, I know. He told me in Vienna.”

“What?”

Ritsuko looked so distraught compared to Takeshi, but he was probably only taking this marginally better because he knew more about the situation. And since I already had enough time for me to decently process everything, I was faring the best out of the three of us. How funny that the ones I called to keep me company while I was distressed are the ones left even more distressed by the situation.

“Okay, okay,” Ritsuko said. “I understand why you didn’t tell us about it, but I don’t understand how or why this happened.”

“Fukuda, get with the program here!”  I felt her glare, directed at Takeshi, pierce through me. “There was nothing to be done here.”

“Bull. Shit.” I winced. “They both loved each other; therefore, they cared about each other. If they really cared enough, then they probably wouldn’t have ended up in this mess in the first place.”

“That was their problem: caring about each other.”

Being stuck in the middle of this felt like the personification of what was once my mental state. Their increasing volume, directed at my eardrums, really wasn’t making this any more pleasant than when it was contained in my mind.

“They would’ve found some way to talk it out then. What, did they not trust each other or something?”

“Bingo.”

Ritsuko stopped arguing, and an expression of bemusement erased the frustration from earlier.

“Risa, explain.”

“I…don’t think it’s my right to explain. Well, not for him anyway. Maybe ask Takeshi later if you’re so curious. Or ask Hiwatari out for coffee sometime and get it from the man himself.” I forced a laugh. “Trusting people is hard when you’ve gone through stuff, you know?”

Understanding what I was implying, Ritsuko nodded. I saw tears bead at the corner of her eyes, and she excused herself to my bathroom, leaving me and Takeshi left on the sofa.

“How’re you holding up?” I asked him.

“I honestly don’t know how I’m still keeping it together right now,” Takeshi hollowly laughed. “I know more about it than most people, but I’m still in shock about it. I get why it happened, but like, Satoshi’s the most logical person I know, so it’s just difficult for me to wrap my head around how he could let this train wreck occur.” He sighed. “God, considering how awful I’m feeling now, I can’t even begin to fathom how you two must’ve felt about the whole thing.”

“You can empathize?” I joked, if only to relieve the tension in the room.

“Boss, why do you gotta be like this now? I’m trying not to cry here!”

“Don’t you dare shed any of your tears in front of me.”

He retreated into my bedroom. Moments later, Ritsuko sat down next to me with puffy eyes and a red nose. She offered me a weak smile.

“If anyone should be crying, it should be me,” I said.

“Oh, can it. You want to cry, but you can’t, so you’re making all of us get dehydrated for you.”

“Crap! You’ve foiled my evil plan!”

Ritsuko laughed, and I smiled. Honestly, I was too numb to feel much of anything. Just having Riku find out the last thing I ever wanted to know about and barreling into my apartment with murderous intent was traumatic enough to shock the emotions out of me.

“Honestly though, I was so scared to tell anyone, especially you guys. What if you said that I couldn’t feel the way that I felt because I needed to be mindful of what Hiwatari-san when through? Or took sides, whether mine or his? I couldn’t deal with that.”

“Like Riku?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I get where she’s coming from. Even though I’m understanding of the situation, that doesn’t mean I’m not angry. There’s a lot going on here, and a lot I don’t understand, but I can see why you didn’t tell anyone back then, right? They’d tell you to cut him off, unaware of the baggage you two carry, and it would’ve just made you feel even worse about the situation, right?”

I nodded.

“Well, Saehara and I are adults who aren’t your family. And we’re also his friend. What you’ve said here won’t change anything regarding our relationship with him. Likewise, what he says about you when I ask him about it won’t change the fact that you’re an amazing person that I’m proud to call one of my best friends.”

“Ritsuko!” I pulled her into a hug that she returned.

“After everything that happened, this is what makes you tear up? God, you’re hopeless!”

I laughed, wiping my tears away as I let her go. Takeshi returned, looking like he had taken a trip through the seven layers of hell, but he grinned before sitting back down on the sofa.

We spent the evening digging into some of the food while watching a movie since I had done more than enough talking. And once they left, bags filled with Tupperware and wine, I retreated to my bedroom and collapsed on my bed.

I turned to the music box sitting on the nightstand, winding it up before floating away to dreamland.

…

I woke up the next morning, before my alarm clock would shock me awake or the sun would burn the inside of my eyelids, to my phone ringing. Most people wouldn’t think to bother anyone at this time but, cracking an eye open to look at the caller ID, he wasn’t most people.

“What?” I croaked, irritated that he needed me for whatever reason that warranted a call at this time of day.

“Good morning to you, too.” I could hear the smile in his voice. Damn bastard was enjoying this. “How are you faring from last night?”

“What do you mean?”

“Leaving you alone with all those bottles of wine after what happened yesterday? It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together; you’re probably hungover.”

“I am a perfectly functional human being who has other coping mechanisms besides drowning myself in alcohol.”

“Past experiences say otherwise.”

“I didn’t drink at all last night; I have Takeshi, and Ritsuko as my witnesses.”

Hiwatari fell silent on the other end of the line while I stretched awake, putting my phone on speaker as I got up. While I was making my bed, Hiwatari spoke up.

“So they know now.”

“I’d rather they didn’t hear from Riku, so I told them first. Sorry to tell them so soon.”

“It’s fine.” He paused. “Should I be expecting attempts on my life now?”

“Nope. They took it well, surprisingly. They might give you a hard time because of it, but no one wants you dead. I think.”

After smoothing out my sheets, I admired my handiwork before grabbing my phone and heading to the kitchen for some breakfast. “Anyways, why’d you call?”

“Partly to check up on you in case you were hungover, but I was wondering if you’d be okay with me walking you to the news station today.”

“…really? You called me this early in the morning for that?”

“I’d rather not be greeted by your choice designer handbag of the day in my face.”

“Who said I’m still not going to do that?”

“Damn. I thought this would lessen my chances.” I could hear the lilt in his voice, and I couldn’t help but smile. “I’m glad to hear you’re doing okay though.”

“I’m about as okay as I’m going to be considering. Thank you for your concern, though.”

“It’s no problem. And could you also open your door, please? This bag is quite heavy, and it might become a problem for me if I keep standing here holding it.”

My usual alarm rang and, startled, I frenzied over to my front door. I swung it open to see Hiwatari standing there, convenience store bag in hand, with unveiled derision on his face.

“…actually, seeing you fresh from bed might be a greeting worse than a purse smashing my face. Tokyo has not been kind to your skin.”

“Get inside before I smash your face with that bag in your hands.”

…

“So, how’s the engaged couple?” Takeshi asked before unceremoniously slurping his noodles and splashing some of his broth onto shirt as if he didn’t just ask a loaded question. He couldn’t be this obtuse considering what just happened.

“Why don’t you ask Daisuke yourself?” Hiwatari asked.

“After what happened when they got back? I’d rather not deal with Beauty and the Beast.”

“And you thought we would have the answer to your question?”

“Maybe not the Boss, but I’m sure you’ve got something, Chief. Gimme the deets.”

“Riku’s out for my head; Daisuke’s trying to protect it: the usual. I have nothing else to report.”

Takeshi groaned. “Useless! It’s like you want me to die in the lion’s den.”

“I’m sure an unsuspecting fly like you will survive just fine.”             

And with that, Hiwatari started eating his noodles, effectively direction his attention away from Takeshi and cleanly cutting that conversation short. Thus, I was the next victim of his poor attempt at small talk. “So, Boss, how’s the ramen?”

“Beautiful,” I answered, eyes trained on the wisps of steam coming from my untouched ramen. I noted the sheen of the broth on the noodles peeking out, following the fat bubbles gently floating amongst the green onions.

“Er, that’s not—”

My phone rang, and I looked at my phone to see a text from Riku asking to meet up for dinner later. Considering what had just happened, I didn’t think it would go well, but this was my sister. As hesitant and terrified I was, I wanted to put this behind us as quickly as possible.

“Whozzat?” Takeshi asked when I put my phone down after sending out my reply. He slurped down yet another ungodly amount of noodles, and I tried to conceal my disgust.

Akane scored in the relationship department. Truly.

“Riku. She asked to meet up with her later, so that’s what I’ll be doing instead of enjoying the comforts of my bed.”

Takeshi whistled, shaking his head, before returning to his bowl. “Don’t die, Boss.”

“I’ll try not to; no guarantees.”

I then decided to dig into my bowl, truly savoring my first bite. May this feeling prevail during dinner.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” Hiwatari asked, voice laced with concern.

“Yeah. What could possibly go wrong?”

Takeshi and Hiwatari looked up from their bowls with their eyebrows raised. Hiwatari’s skeptical expression, paired with Takeshi’s eyes that begged me to rethink my words, helped me realize that I was only fooling myself. My sister was a human, but she was a Harada. And, considering that we have practically the same blood, I knew the insanity that could arise from it.

No doubt, were this situation reversed, I wouldn’t have stopped until I had the head of whomever hurt my sister roasted on a spit.

“Okay. Fine. Everything can and probably will go wrong.”

“It was nice knowing ya, Boss.”

“Let’s relish in our last meal together before your premature death.”

“Oh, go f—”

“Irasshai!”

…

“God speed!” Takeshi saluted. I returned the gesture.

“We’re here for you if you need us later,” Hiwatari assured.

“Hopefully, I’ll be fine. And I’ll just bother Ritsuko if I need someone. You guys have done more than enough by walking me here.”

“What’re friends for? We gotta see you before you march to your death!” Takeshi chirped.

“Really?”

“Boss, your sister is terrifying.”

“Don’t mind him,” Hiwatari said. “Good luck.”

I nodded, waving goodbye to them as they walked away. And once they started talking to each other a considerable distance away, I took a deep breath before walking in. This was Riku’s favorite place to grab sushi, and I saw her standing by the hostess’ stand, a couple of minutes earlier than what we had planned, as she nervously toyed with a stray thread on her blouse. She noticed me and smiled before turning to the hostess, who greeted us with a blinding smile, as she led us to a booth with two menus in her hand.

Why the booth of all places? The bar was ideal: I wouldn’t have to face Riku, I could occupy myself by staring at the chef, focus on anything and everything but—

“Can I have a beer and a highball?” Riku ordered once our waiter came by. He then turned to me, expecting, just like the sister that sat across from me.

“Just some green tea, please.”

The water nodded, heading off to grab our drink and attend to the other patrons, leaving me to watch Riku flip through the menu. (She didn’t need to. Her staple was the combo of maki rolls.)

“Do you know what you want to eat?” she calmly asked me as if she wasn’t radiating anger and didn’t just order alcohol.

I was not making it out alive.

“Um, I’ll just have some ebi and tamago nigari.”

“You usually order something extravagant. Don’t be shy; it’s my treat.”

It’s precisely because this is your treat which is why I’m being shy. As susceptible as I am to free food, this was a gift horse I needed to burn. “It’s okay. I had ramen, and I’m still kind of full.”

“Huh,” she hollowly said. “Didn’t think your appetite could ever be quenched.”

And the crocodile snaps!

Before she prematurely exploded, the waiter returned to our table with our drinks. Riku ordered for us before the waiter headed off. I moved my drink closer to me, unable to enjoy the warmth in my hands as she downed her beer. I expected her to polish off that highball, but she called a waiter passing by, asking him to for a gin and tonic. Once he left, she grabbed her other drink that she finished in seconds before slamming the glass on the table and staring straight into my eyes.

In any other situation, this would’ve been a great time to ask what college shenanigans Riku got herself into considering what she did took skill, and we could laugh about all the ill-timed hangovers and nostalgia over a nice sushi dinner. This was me trying to imagine this as anything but what it actually was: terrifying.

“Honestly, Risa, what the hell were you thinking getting involved with Satoshi like that?” she asked, more disappointed than angry. “You should’ve known that was a bad idea.”

“Yes because I was able to rationalize while I was sick with the flu and the guy I thought would never love me kissed me.”

She groaned, reaching for her drinks. And when she found them both empty, she groaned again before slamming the empty glass on the table. Again. “If I wasn’t drinking right now, I wouldn’t be able to stomach your bullshit excuses.”

“Yeah, you’re right. All I’ve really got are bullshit excuses for what happened.” I paused our conversation when our water returned, drink in hand, as he placed it in front of Riku. I flinched as she reached out for it, scared she would down it again, but she merely took a sip. She looked at me when she finished, expecting me to elaborate. “I took the opportunity because I knew Hiwatari would—could—never accept my affections.”

“Do you know why he stopped talking to you and tried to erase you from his existence?”

“Did you know about it before Daisuke told you?”

“Not the specifics, but like everyone else, we knew something happened between you two back then. I thought the six years apart would’ve smoothed it out since you tend to over-exaggerate everything but—god. I didn’t think it was this bad.” She sighed before having another sip of her drink. “Are you guys stupid enough to think that getting closer would fix this?”

I shrugged. “Apparently.”

“You two are insane.”

“Just like what you’re being right now.”

She glared at me with a red face as the alcohol settled into her system. “I have every right to after hearing everything from Daisuke. Do you need me to—?”

“I know, Riku. Hiwatari-san told me himself.”

The rage in her expression fizzled out as she stared at me with wide eyes. Was this the ammunition she was waiting to use to get me to listen to her? Was she hoping that this would end it all?

“Y-you need to leave Azumano and get away from Satoshi,” she started. “This closeness can’t be good for you two. I-I don’t want to see you hurt again.”

Tears formed at the corner of her eyes, and she furiously wiped them away. Were those her true feelings hiding behind that animosity of hers? Or was it the alcohol causing her emotions to swing?

“I’m calling Daisuke to bring you home now.”

“No! I’m—”

“I’m calling him.”

She didn’t protest. She just sat in her seat, silently sipping on her drink while I headed out to call Daisuke. I returned to see Riku’s head resting on the table.

Passed out or asleep?

Daisuke came by pretty quickly, and I spotted him, completely flustered, as he approached our table.

“Oh, god, Risa. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. Just make sure she gets home safe.”

He nodded, hoisting her up on his shoulder. I expected him to leave immediately, maybe whispering something under his breath, but he just stood by the table.

“About Riku finding out…sorry. I accidentally slipped up by saying something, and Riku kept pestering me about it and—”

“It’s fine. Just go.”

And with that, Daisuke left. The waiter then came, food in hand, wondering where my sister went. I told him not to worry about it, saying to just leave the food there and get me the check ASAP.

“Risa?”

I looked up to see my parents hovering at the edge of my table. They were excited to see me, but what were they doing here?

“Where’s your sister?” my mother asked as my dad slipped into the booth across from me.

“Home. She ended drinking a little too much, so I asked Daisuke to take her back home.”

My mom gasped before sitting down next to my dad. “Oh my, goodness. Is she alright?”

“I hope so. What brings you two here?”

“Actually, Riku was the one who asked us to come.”

“Why?”

My mom shrugged. “She said she’d explain it to us here. Do you know what she wanted to talk to us about?”

“No clue,” I feigned. The longer I kept my parents unaware of this, the better I’d feel. No way did I want to deal with the wrath of three Haradas at any given time. “You two help yourselves. My treat.”

“Thank you,” my father grumbled, cautiously eyeing the half empty drink Riku left, taking a sip of it, and slowly moving it towards him, before looking through the menu.

“Are you going to eat that?” My mom motioned to the maki set that Riku ordered. I shook my head, and she happily dug in.

I had a feeling the next time I met them, they would be hostile. So I enjoyed this brief moment, getting along with my parents for once and hoping it would never end.

…

Once I was at the news station the next morning, my phone started vibrating like crazy. My mom was sending frantic messages about Riku waking up with a headache, asking me if I was sure that she was okay. Riku certainly was far from okay, but I didn’t want to aggravate this already precarious situation so, like any responsible adult, I lied to my mom by telling her that Riku was having so much fun last night that she wasn’t pacing herself well before silencing my phone and stuffing it into the deep recesses of a pocket in my purse that I zipped up.

“Good morning, Harada-san,” the security guard greeted when I approached the elevators. “There’s someone looking for you.”

“Where are they?”

“Upstairs. I led them to your cubicle.”

“You just…let them in like that?”

“He showed me proper ID, but I can’t seem to recall his name. He just told me that he has official business with you.”

“…and you’re sure that it’s not Commissioner Hiwatari?”

“I’d recognize him anywhere, so it’s not him.”

“Okay. Thank you?”

He offered me a smile that I hesitantly returned before walking past him, mentally noting that we might need a personnel change for safety measures. Who could possibly need to have an official meeting with me and come by unannounced?

…oh shit.

Once the elevator landed on my floor, I rushed to my cubicle. There Kazama sat, leaning back in my desk chair with a mug of coffee in his hands, animatedly chatting with Takeshi who looked ready to keel over. Poor guy having to deal with him so early in the morning.

“And so—oh! Harada-san! The woman of the hour! You’ve kept me waiting!”

“And you’ve entertained Takeshi enough. Let him get back to work.”

As Takeshi passed by me, he patted my shoulder. I expected a look of gratitude of relief on his face, but he looked like he was on the verge of tears. “You’re a saint for saving me, Boss, but the Chief’s going to kill me for coming into the precinct so late.” He rushed out before I could even offer him words of consolation for the predicament this dickhead had put him in.

“It’s to be expected that a Hiwatari knows how to crack the ol’ whip every now and then!” Kazami chirped as I loudly dropped my stuff onto my desk. He was unfazed by the noise, but a couple of my neighbors peeked over the walls of my cubicle, wondering if they could get a glimpse at what had pissed me off first thing in the morning.

“So, what brings you here?” I ask, sitting down in a chair I reserved for guests because of Kazama’s snooty ass lavishly lounging in my comfortable one.

“That’s a rhetorical question, isn’t it?”

“Look, I know why you’re here, but couldn’t this have waited until I finished work for the day? Also, don’t you have super important cases to win back in Tokyo?”

“They’re not as important as getting some much needed R&R.” I scoff at his comment. “And am I not allowed to say hello to my favorite Harada?”

I wince at his words. “You’re not. I have work to do, and you’re bothering me right now, so you need to leave.”

“Not even a please? Goodness, whatever happened to treating your elders with manners?”

“Look,” I started in English, hoping my coworkers would have trouble understanding me, “my job already pisses me off enough, and I don’t need you to add onto that stress, okay? So if you could just lay off until this evening, that’d be great.”

Kazama whistled. “Amazing accent, Harada-san! I expected nothing less from a Todai graduate.”

I glared at him, and he stood up and gathered his things. “I’ll see you at Satoshi’s place for dinner, then?”

“If you’re cooking, I’ll pass.”

He chortled, knowing that I enjoyed his cooking far too much to miss out on it, and he left without another word. As I settled into my seat, I saw the peering eyes disappear in my peripheries. While I got myself ready for yet another day of work, I heard the murmurs of my coworkers as they concocted yet another rumor to spread about me.

Don’t these people have anything better to do than waste their time on the train wreck of my life?

…

As usual, Hiwatari met up with me outside the news station after the broadcast finished. We didn’t talk much on the way to his apartment, but we dropped by a bakery and grabbed a cake.

When we arrived, we were greeted by a lovely smell coming from the kitchen. Hiwatari greeted Kazama while I sat down at the table, admiring the cake through the flimsy plastic window on the box. All I had to do was survive an amazing dinner with not-so-amazing company, and then I could indulge in this beauty.

After talking to Kazama, Hiwatari headed into his room. He came out in yet another pair of ratty pajamas before slipping into the seat next to me.

“Have you talked to Daisuke yet?” I asked.

“No. It’s—I can’t bring myself to see him. I’m upset that he told Riku, but I’m mostly ashamed that it had come to this.” I nodded. “How was your talk with Riku last night?”

“She got super plastered, passed out at the table, and I had to call Daisuke to pick her up. She couldn’t last long enough to tell my parents about it.”

“Your parents?”

“Yeah. She was planning on telling them while half delirious under the influence of alcohol. Luckily, they didn’t find out, but I don’t know how long they’ll be kept in the dark about this.”

“Oh, juicy stuff!” Kazama interjected. He placed steaming hot plates of food in front of us, and it looked like he cooked extra for me to take home. “So, the older sister knows and is planning on making it worse by involving your parents?”

“Well, they have every right to know, but I’d rather they not.”

Kazama’s laugh trailed off as he went into the kitchen. He returned with two cans of beer, placing one in front of me, before plopping into one of the empty seats and opening his can.

“None for you, Big Boy. It’s what got you into this mess in the first place.” He took a sip. “Ah, that’s the stuff!”

For the most part, dinner went smoothly Hiwatari and Kazama rambled on about politics while I savored my food. When we finished, Hiwatari vehemently insisted that he do the dishes, leaving me and Kazama in the living room, crowded around the TV softly playing a rerun of an old drama, while Kazama cut the cake.

“For you, madam,” he joked as he passed me a slice of cake and a fork.

“Thank you, but shut up.”

When Hiwatari finished, he sat on the floor by Kazama. He helped himself to a slice of cake with a blank expression.

“So, the heart of the matter, you two,” Kazama started. “Run your next steps by me.”

“Jump off the cliffs and fall to our untimely deaths,” I grumbled before taking a bite of my cake.

Ah, how blissful.

“Seconded,” Hiwatari said.

“Ah-ah. The goal is to live, children. So, seriously, what is your plan?”

“Hope my parents never find out.”

“And if they do?”

“Die.”

“Harada-san! I trusted you to be stronger than this! What did you expect to happen as a consequence of your actions?”

“This. Exactly this. It’s just as bad as I envisioned it to be.”

Kazama laughed, clearly amused at our suffering, but he eventually calmed down. I expected him to say something absurd or rude to follow my statement, but he didn’t.

“You can’t control others, Harada-san. All you can do now is hang in there and take the punches.” Kazama paused. “Does your family normally react this extremely to these kinds of situations?”

“Yeah. They’ve always been over-protective, but I think it got worse after Argentine kidnapped me.”

Kazama didn’t say anything. Instead, he turned to Hiwatari and frowned. “Friendly reminder that this is your fault. I won’t protect you from whatever will come your way. Do you understand me?”

“Yes.”

“You need to accept that the family you found with the Haradas will change or disappear when they find out.”

Hiwatari’s lips thinned in a line. I didn’t know how dear Hiwatari held my family. Likewise, I didn’t know how fondly my parents thought of Hiwatari, either.

The thought of losing people never sat well for anyone, especially Hiwatari. I couldn’t imagine what he could be feeling right now.

“Well, since shit hasn’t completely hit the fan, you two should play it by ear.” He glanced at the clock on the wall. “Well, it’s time for me to visit the Niwas! Can’t wait to see how divisive everyone will be! Toodles!”

The front door slammed shut, leaving me and Hiwatari with a half-eaten cake and the TV blaring some annoying advertisement. I moved towards him, concerned at his slumped body.

“So, how’d the thing with my parents happen?” I asked. “I’m genuinely curious; after all, they’re not the Niwas.”

“Because of Riku.”      

Hiwatari looked up and, after noticing the shock on my face, looked back down at the floor. “…you don’t know what happened?”

“This may or may not be news to you, but I also cut off contact with everyone in Azumano while I was in Tokyo.” I narrowed my eyes. “What happened to my sister?”

“After you left, she couldn’t leave her bed. She was nauseous, feverous, and could barely keep anything down.”

“What? Why?!”

“Apparently, whenever you two were separated for extended periods of time, Riku would always get sick.”

“Why is this my first time hearing about this? And from you of all people?”

“No one wanted you to worry. And you probably would’ve never found out if it weren’t for me. And this situation.”

“Okay, so what do you have to do with any of this?”

“When I heard about it from Daisuke, I decided to pay Riku and your family a visit. For whatever reason, they thought Riku’s condition was caused by some spiritual connection the two of you share because you’re twins.” Hiwatari frowned. “I don’t understand why you Haradas are so obsessed with mysticism.”

“You’re one to talk with that magical, artsy blood flowing in your veins.”

Hiwatari sighed before continuing. “It turns out that Riku was too anxious without you. Her brain was conditioned to think that the two of you being together meant that both of you were safe. So, whenever you were gone, she ended up worrying about both you and her.”

“What’d you do?”

“I told her you weren’t really gone. You were just living your life in Tokyo without much of a care in the world.”

“…I’m assuming that didn’t help.”

“Not at all.”

I laughed, and Hiwatari smiled before continuing. “Riku needed to learn how to live again for herself. So I made her exercise, go out with family and friends, and suffer through game night at the Niwas. I just needed to jumpstart her brain so that she wouldn’t crumble again when she returned to college.” 

“Returned to college?”

“She had to withdraw from college during her first semester after failing her first round of midterms.”

Our eyes met for a couple of seconds, and the shock initially on his face gave way to an expression of hurt. “Harada-san…”

“Continue, Hiwatari-san.”

“Are you sure?”

“Continue.”

He hesitated, and I watched him shift his posture slightly to buy him some time. His hand slid closer to me, unable to move any further: all he could offer at this moment was half-assed consolation, but it was the only thing we could mentally accept right now.

I slid mine closer, thankful for the gesture but too afraid to fully commit, and Hiwatari continued. “Since she wasn’t getting better, I had to coerce your parents into taking her to therapy. She improved from there, and she was able to go back to college the following year.”

“How did you get closer to my parents then?”

“A little while after I started coming over to help Riku, your mother, in true Risa fashion, had sat me down once with coffee and asked me to talk about myself. Honestly, I mostly just sat there in silence while she bombarded me with questions.” I laughed. “But, while one of her daughters was AWOL, the other one practically unresponsive, she still somehow managed to genuinely care about how I was doing.” He paused. “From there on, your parents somehow found a way to make me feel at home. They let me breathe in a way that the Niwas didn’t. Even though I had an inkling they did it to cope with what was going on with the two of you, I felt like that was how it felt to have parents.”

“Huh.”

Hiwatari only smiled. “Well, anyways, my uncle’s right; I only have myself to blame for this mess.” He then glanced at his phone. “And as much as I appreciate this intimate session of catching up, it’s late and we both have work tomorrow. It’s time for me to walk you back.”

“I’ll be fine. Thank you for the offer, though.”

“…I would insist but, after the conversation we just had, please accept me calling you a ride.”

“Thank you.”

Hiwatari packed enough food to last me a week and enough cake to fatten me up in two evenings. I stood by the door, putting on my shoes, and ready to go home and think.

“Harada-san.”

“Mhm?”

Hiwatari looked lost for once. “Your ride is here.”

“Thank you.”

“And I’m sorry.”

I laughed at his awful timing. My hand reached out to playfully punch him in the shoulder but, after seeing that somber expression on his face, I stopped myself. Only then did I realize the gravity of the situation.

“…your ride is about to leave.”

“Yes! Yes, I’ll see you around.”

When the door closed behind me, I sprinted down. The driver was feeling especially chatty for that trip, affording me a handful of minutes to not think about the shit storm waiting for us. And once they dropped me off at my apartment, it took me everything to not march to Mizuame de Noisette and have an evening full of regret.

I headed up to my room like a responsible adult and decided, instead, to pass out on my sofa, unable to fall asleep despite the tinny notes that usually lulled me to sleep.

…

Daisuke had sent me a message the next morning asking if I could meet with him at the museum café. I sent a message to the group chat I had with Takeshi and Hiwatari saying that I had other lunch plans that day and for them to enjoy their midday meal without me.

So, whilst eating a chicken club sandwich in a sterile museum café, Takeshi kept spamming the chat with the lunch menu from some upscale restaurant. I silenced my phone before tossing it into my purse and giving Daisuke my full attention. He was digging into a salad and wincing with each bite he took.

“Um…are you alright?”

“I need to start losing weight for the wedding.”

I blinked, examining Dasiuke’s lean body for any sign of fat. The man was barely filling out his clothes. What weight was he trying to lose here?

“Please don’t tell me you asked me to come over for solidarity during this time of suffering.”

“Oh no. I just wanted to let you know that Riku’s planning on telling your parents about what happened with you and Satoshi before she left for work later.”

I nearly squeezed the filling out of my sandwich.

“I also wanted to apologize, but I don’t think that’s going to help the situation.”

“Well, even though you’re right, I still accept your apology.” Daisuke nodded. “Actually, I’m kind of also here to ask about what happened with Riku after I left.”

Daisuke looked up from his sandwich in shock. “Satoshi told you?”

“Yeah. Why? What’s wrong?”

“Well, Riku kind of made us promise her to never tell you about it, but if Satoshi decided to tell you, I’m sure he had a good reason to break it then.”

“Is me asking about how he got close to my parents a good enough reason?”

“Considering the impending situation on our hands, I think so. Besides, I think it’s good that the truth is finally airing itself out even if it’s a little…hectic right now.”

“You’re the last person who should be saying that considering this mess is kind of your fault.”

Daisuke sheepishly smiled. “I suppose you’re right then.”

I watched him cringe through another bite of his salad, and I had half a mind to order the menu item with the largest calorie intake. My future brother-in-law shouldn’t have to suffer like this right after getting engaged.

“Well, I honestly don’t know if I can add onto whatever Satoshi already told you. Since I was in college at the time, I only saw Riku on the weekends. She called me a lot because Satoshi was brutal with her, but I don’t think that’s what you wanted to hear from me.

“I will say, even though I am your sister’s fiancé, I do think that she’s overstepping a boundary here. I understand that she’s hurt, but what she’s set out to do is probably going to cause more harm than good.” Daisuke smiled. “But there’s nothing we can do about that now. Once she’s like that, you know it’s impossible to stop her.”

Our talk had made me lose my appetite, and I left lunch with Daisuke earlier than I thought I would. Takeshi came into the news station that afternoon to gloat about his amazing lunch date with Satoshi, to which I didn’t pay much attention to considering I was more worried about what would occur later that day.

When I got a message from my dad around the time that Riku usually left for work, I knew it was over. I messaged Daisuke, requesting that he ask Kazama to grab a table at Mizuame de Noisette later, and I marched home for what may be one of the worst evenings of my life.

[cupofteaguk]

all too well | 05

summary: you and Yoongi shared a loving relationship with one another until you both agreed to end things and pursue your separate careers. but two years later, Yoongi is a member of the ever growing Bangtan Boys, and you are a new makeup artist for their upcoming tour. 

pairing: yoongi x fem!reader

genre: idol au, makeup artist au, exes au | angst/smut

warnings: hoseok develops a crush wink wonk, depictions of jealousy 

word count: 5k

.

You wish that your natural inclination toward Yoongi’s gestures, thoughts, and emotions was something you could flick off like a light switch. You wish you could turn off certain memories and knowledge, how you could tell and understand so readily about what Yoongi was thinking about.

The boy use to always be a stellar liar, able to cover up his emotions well in the form of a defense mechanism, but over the time you got to know him and date him and love him, you’ve always been unbelievably good at reading him. You understood better than most about how the air around him hung and what kind of emotions were always just brimming underneath the surface.

But you hate having that kind of knowledge now. You hate knowing that even after all this time, all this distance, after that heartbreak, Yoongi still cares. He cares so, so much, that desire swimming underneath the surface, he cares so much that the thought of you running off with Hoseok is enough to make his blood boil.

You never wished you could unlearn something more. You wish you could forget the way he looked at you that evening in Tokyo, telling you he didn’t care about you and he didn’t care about you and Hoseok when it was so glaringly obvious that he just cared too much.

That’s probably where things started to change between the two of you.

Now that you’ve been burdened with the insight of Yoongi’s true feelings, it’s only made things that much harder for you to try and remain professional. Yoongi has stopped trying as hard, meaning that his attempts to break you have only become more and more consistent. And it’s steadily becoming more difficult to ignore him.

“What about boyfriends?”

You blink, narrowing your eyes once more as you refocus on sweeping the color back across Yoongi’s eyes. Following the two nights of Tokyo have found Bangtan boarding a plane once more, flying into Beijing for another 2 night session in the city. The first night is fastly approaching, the excitement brimming underneath the surface as chatter remains as light-hearted as possible between everyone.

Well, with the exception of the pair in the corner, in which Min Yoongi is staring at you carefully, watching every gesture and expression your make, eyes wide to follow your movements. He’s gazing up at you as if he’s expecting something out of you and that thought is so unnerving that you try to keep yourself as preoccupied as possible with as many different activities as you could possibly see fit. You purposely take longer with the eyeshadow and the foundation and the lipstick, thinking you could actually survive another long, slightly awkward, very tense session with Yoongi—even though he’s giving you a look that simultaneously makes you want to shove him away or maybe even drag out all these stupid questions he has for you with your mouth against his—!

You apply the sponge against the corner of his lips. “No boyfriends,” You echo quietly, furrowing your eyebrows when you have to lean in a little closer to try catch every detail of the spot you’re trying to cover.

“None at all?”

You pull away. “Nope.”

Yoongi seems to relax a little the more you pull back from his personal space. “Why not?”

You whirl around to glare at him. “Oh, I don’t know, maybe because I’ve gathered some commitment issues over the years?” You retort, taking that frustration from Yoongi’s inability to cooperate on the professional relationship he requested in the start and your own personal irritation at somehow still caring for Yoongi as much as he cared for you. “I never know when a guy could just leave me behind for something they realize they care about more than me—there’s so much at risk, you know? Like a missed anniversary. Or a broken heart. Or refusing to eat any of the meals I could potentially want to cook for them.”

You gather the eyebrow powder and angled brush once more, collecting some of the color on before leaning forward once more.

Yoongi keeps his gaze on you. “There’s still a chance things could work out.”

“Maybe—if someone wasn’t always working.”

“Maybe if someone were more understanding.”

He sees something flicker in your eyes, the conversation turning from hypothetical to historical very quickly. “What could be more important than your health and wellbeing?”

Yoongi scoffs as if you had just asked him why the Earth orbited around the sun. “Uh, making music? Meeting the fans who take time out of their day to see me?”

“Sounds really selfish to me,” You interject through gritted teeth. “What about the person who stays behind, who stays awake just to try and have a five minute conversation with you? You leave her behind to chase after your dreams. You leave her behind to have this life of fame and success when she has days when she often struggles to make ends meet, when she has to cry alone in the bathroom because no one is there to listen to her problems. All because she thought playing the role of the supportive girlfriend was what her boyfriend needed—he never once asked her about her feelings, and she never once told him. When all that happens, who’s the selfish one there?”

Your faces are so close together again, the heat of your words weighing down upon Yoongi’s shoulders but he doesn’t look away, he refuses to, and he can see the memories like a movie behind your eyes. It seems as if all your previous exasperations only make your emotions even more intense, like you’re equally as tired of hiding behind a facade. For the first time since you walked back into his life (quite literally too, in fact), he sees you.

The you he left behind that one spring evening, black cocktail dress and high heel shoes, refusing to compromise—how much he truly ruined you, how much he left you behind with.

Your gaze flickers down to his lips, as if expecting him to say something, but it’s not like he has a statement readily available for moments like these so he struggles, desperate to say anything to rid of that look in your eyes but what on earth could he possibly say?

You straighten a little, snapping the eyebrow powder casing close, something finished and finalized. “But then again,” You draw out. “She’s not your girlfriend anymore—and she’ll never be your girlfriend again. What kind of say would she have in something like this anyways?”

You’re about to turn around, end the conversation even though your heart is positively ramming now. It would definitely do some good to take a step back and ponder about whether or not you went too far with admitting or showcasing too much of your emotions. But Yoongi’s hand darts out to wrap around your wrist, halting the gesture. You feel your heart stop as your look down to study the boy, still gazing up at you with eyes so big they look hopeful and that’s enough to get you turn your head away.

“He might surprise her,” He whispers, something about his tone forcing you to make eye contact with you. “He might have tried to forget her—but how could he forget her, really? She changed his life.”

“Yoongi…”

He can’t tell if you’re trying to stop him or egg him on, so he goes with what he feels is the best solution. “Do you remember the first time you ever saw me?”

“Yoongi.”

He tightens his grip around your wrist. “I remember,” He continues. “I remember seeing you every night, you would walk by while I was performing, but you never stopped—I think I started noticing you after about two weeks. But one day you stayed. It was that winter night, do you remember? Snow was even starting to fall, although it was light and wasn’t heavy enough to make it to the ground. You had those black jeans on, boots, a navy coat, that black scarf your mom knitted for you, and a beanie with that little puff at the top.”

That irritation clouding your eyes has melted away, replaced with a nostalgic softness and sympathy. “You know, under completely different circumstances, knowing all that information would be creepy.”

“You smiled when I asked you out for coffee. You don’t smile like that anymore,” He notes quietly, loosening his grip on you just enough to run his thumb gently over your skin.

You flicker your gaze down to study the gesture carefully, as if trying to gauge how you feel about it. True, it makes you feel softer and warmer, but it also fills you with a distant sadness with the knowledge that you and Yoongi could never return to who the pair of you used to be. Even though he feels so close now, skin on skin contact making your heart beat quicker—beat for him—he’s never felt so far away.

“Well, a lot’s happened in two years Yoongi,” You whisper back. “And there are some things you can’t take back.”

Yoongi opens his mouth to say something, anything, before a sudden voice calling your name is enough to get his blood boiling once more.

“Y/N! Noona!” Hoseok calls in a sing-song tone from a few chairs down, waving his phone wildly at you as you and Yoongi look up from your private conversation towards the younger boy. “Noona, can you do my hair?”

You manage an easy smile that makes Yoongi’s heart sputter in his chest. “I’ll be there in a second.”

“Y/N—!”

You gently try to tug your wrist out of his grasp. “C’mon, I have to do my job.”

“Can’t Hoseok get someone else to do it?”

“Yoongi, this is my job. Haven’t we all made sacrifices for it?”

Because you sacrificed me, you sacrificed me, you sacrificed me—!

Yoongi lets go of you, probably because he sees your winded expression and can immediately have some idea about the thoughts that suddenly plague your mind.

You’re going to have a talk with him about that, about how the pair of you really needed to stop reading each other so well, even though it’s just a natural setting in your day-to-day functions.

Giving the boy one last lingering glance, you find that you have to force yourself to look away first before pacing your way over to Hoseok, who looks excited to have gained your attention, even if it’s over something as silly as the fact that you had to flat iron his hair. “Hi noona.”

“Hi Hoseok,” You greet back, grabbing the flat iron and running your fingers gently through his hair, mulling it around just to gauge how much hair you would need to cover in a short period of time. “You excited for the show tonight?”

“Of course.” His eyes are watching you carefully through the reflection in the mirror as you poke your tongue out from in between your teeth in concentration as to ensure you wouldn’t burn your fingers. “Will you be watching me, noona?”

You snort, keeping your eyes trained on Hoseok’s hair. “Sure Hoseok.”

Even though the banter of teasing is light-hearted, you miss out on the way Yoongi grips the armrests of his chair as he watches your good-natured smile, your laugh, make their way back onto the surface. It seems like nowadays, all Yoongi can pull from you is a pursued lip and the memories of when you told him to walk away and he let you push him away like that.

You miss out on the way Hoseok continues to watch you through the mirror, eyes softening, lips curling up into a distant fondness, heart thrumming with nervousness as he juggles a question back and forth in his mind, something he’s been pondering after just a week upon your entrance into his life, something that merely solidified while getting to sit next to you on the plane. Every little moment spent in your company, no matter how significant or insignificant have helped him gather more and more on your personality and to say he was growing admirable over you would almost be an understatement.

“Noona?�� Hoseok starts again, inwardly cringing at how it lacked his usual amount of confidence and the endearing boyishness he usually displayed around you.

You combed your fingers through his hair, now flat from the iron as you rested the object back onto the desk. “Yes Hoseok?”

“What are you doing later tonight?” He inquires, tilting his head to the side as he watches you stand before him.

“Hm, I might order some room service,” You dismiss with a shrug. “Why? What were you planning?”

“I was thinking of going into the city,” He explains. “There’s this night market I hear is suppose to be really cool.” He pauses. “Maybe you should come with me.”

You raise an eyebrow and exhale in a laugh of disbelief. “Really? You want me to tag along with you and the boys? Wouldn’t that be a little weird?”

“No, no, not that—I mean, it wouldn’t be weird if you came along, the guys really like spending time with you—but that’s not what I meant. I meant if you’d like to come along with me. Just you and me. Together. But not like, together together, just a hang out. As friends.” He’s positively sure his face is beyond red, a signage that he couldn’t really seem to truly find him calm whenever he was around you. Most of those positive, happy-go-lucky facades were posters to mask his true feelings but when it came to actually initiating real requests to see you outside the walls of the industry that brought the two of you together, that’s when he almost couldn’t keep himself together.

“Oh.” The thought of hanging out with another one of the boys in a one-on-one setting really shouldn’t make you that nervous, given you did spend your first night in Tokyo with the company of Jeon Jungkook and that had surpassed your expectations beyond anything else.

But spending an evening with Hoseok fills you with a different sensation. You don’t know if it’s because Hoseok has been underneath your radar from the very first moment he introduced himself into your life, or because of Yoongi’s warning about Hoseok’s intentions. Your oblivious nature regarding boys and their feelings towards you is definitely not something that you’ve been able to outgrow since you last saw Yoongi, and he probably knows this which is why he felt the need to reflect his emotions and concerns back at you.

You rationalize that there’s no way Hoseok could possibly be attracted to you, or interested in you from the way Yoongi made everything seem—the boy certainly is friendly and teases you more often than he does with anyone else from the makeup department, but he has always been physically affectionate and so it leaves you enough to determine that he’s merely asking you to accompany him as a friendly favor.  

And you adore Hoseok. Who would you be to deny the opportunity to hang out with him beyond the walls of venues and soundchecks and screams that hover in your eardrums for hours on end?

You shrug your shoulders. “Sure, that sounds fun.”

Hoseok’s grin is almost blinding.

.

You’ve long since stopped trying to express your surprised nature over the boys and their stamina when Hoseok finishes an hour long concert—in which dance numbers, singing, running around, the whole lot have all been consistent throughout that hour—and bounds into the makeup room in fresh clothing and hair slightly damp from his quick shower, all bright-eyed grins and excitement over the prospect of going to the night market.

You suppose a lot of this readiness has something to do with the fact that Hoseok is about to emerge himself into an environment in which the food will be fresh, constantly available, and plaguing the air from the moment the pair of you step in. You know that thought would be enough to keep you on your toes as well.

Irene promises to help take your makeup products back into the room in return to make you promise you weren’t going to do anything stupid with Hoseok (to which you asked her what she meant, and she merely shook her head and grinned).

The night market Hoseok selected to go to is far enough that a company car has to be driven down to drop the pair of you off, but once you step off from the landing, you find that the only thing you can truly do is gape your mouth at the sight before you. Sure, you’ve experienced your fair share of night markets within Seoul, but it’s almost an entirely different feeling to stand here. It’s not overcrowded with people tonight, which is probably a good thing, as Hoseok grabs your wrist and drags you over to the different booths. The red lanterns are strung high above, clearly visible even from the cloud of steam that emits from each food vendor.

“How do you like it here?” Hoseok inquires as his teeth come out to nip at some of the shrimp on a skewer he has just purchased before handing it over to you.

You take it, purse swinging at your side as you sink your own teeth into your shrimp, allowing the flavoring and texture of the seafood to course down your throat. “Wow, this is amazing!”

“I know right?” Hoseok grins, finding your enjoyment beyond acceptable as he takes back the skewer to eat the last shrimp on the stick. “Seriously, if you see anything let me know okay? I’m paying tonight.”

“What? No way!” You retort, laughing as you gently shove at the boy in an act of rejection. “Can’t we take turns?”

“Nope.” He shakes his head. “You can just pay me back later, alright? I did drag you out here after all.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m really enjoying this,” You say, fixing your gaze upon a booth full of creme pastries and other desserts. “Hey look—sweets!” Grabbing the boy’s wrist, you drag him across the way towards the trays upon trays of display, taking in all the breads before your eyes settle upon a chocolate one with powdered sugar dusted atop. “Maybe we should bring some back for the boys.”

Hoseok watches, traces of a smile inching itself across his lips as he watches the genuine excitement display itself across your lips. “Whatever you say, Y/N.”

The pair of you could only take another hour of the night market before the festivities become too much for you, stomachs too full to fill with anything else of substance as Hoseok offers to led you around in a little stroll around the city. The crowds of people are expected as you both weave in and out of traffic, almost bumping into many people from the number of times you crane your neck up to take in all the sights and lights surrounding you. Beijing is truly not all that different from Seoul in terms of landscapes and city life, brightness threatening to drown you and crowds of people at every turn. But there is a strange adrenaline that comes with submerging yourself in a new city, tugging at the longing strings in your heart as you find that you are surprisingly content with being right where you are right now.

You only daze back when you realize Hoseok has stopped the pair of you in the middle of a small little outdoor shopping market, one of those corner ones that an individual would really have to keep an eye open to see. Little shops of brands you’ve never heard of line the area, benches shattered everywhere as chatter is light to match with the music played by street artists across a variety of small instruments. Despite the smile inching its way towards your features, the sight is achingly familiar. It reminds you of that evening in a navy coat, snow not yet cold enough to reach the ground, a man standing behind a microphone, dressed in black skinny jeans and his own black coat, hair jet black like the night above him.

His soothing voice surprisingly belting out the truth of your own life into the air around you, his eyes holding stories of intensity and galaxies you knew you would yearn for as soon as they looked up to meet yours across the way. How his lips curled up into a gummy smile that took your breath away, how he beckoned you towards him with the jerk of his hand, lifting his right hand to utter the words that forever changed the course of your own life, “Hey, I’ve seen you around a lot recently—I’m Min Yoongi—do you think you’d want to grab some coffee with me sometime—?”

“Y/N?”

You blink, blinking away the thoughts taking a liquid form behind your eyes before Hoseok can see them. He doesn’t appear to notice, because he smiles once he’s noticed that he’s gotten your attention once more. He starts talking, going on about how he discovered this little shopping mall, and you listen to it all with a bated breath because you genuinely are excited and you genuinely are happy to be in the company of Hoseok, the thoughts of another boy fills you mind like steam from the night market and even though you don’t mean to, you find yourself wondering what it would have been like to spend the evening in the company of Min Yoongi instead.

.

“What are you thinking about?”

You blink, hand carefully backing away from Yoongi’s face as he watches you carefully, quirked eyebrow up and that’s when you realize you’ve spent the last 2 minutes swiping the makeup remover back and forth across Yoongi’s eyelid. “Sorry,” You grumble, turning your attention to the other eye.

“I’ll say it again: what were you thinking about?”

“Nothing,” You press, retreating to remove the foundation. “I went out with Hoseok yesterday—to this night market.”

“I know,” He grunts, voice lowering considerably. “He wouldn’t shut up about it—sounds like he’s totally in love with you.”

“It was just as friends,” You snap at his sarcastic quip. “Why do you always assume every guy I hang out with just wants to get into my pants?”

“I’m not,” He grunts, taking in a few measured breathes. “But whatever—how you chose to spend your time doesn’t matter to me.” He pauses for a second. “Where else did you guys go?”

Your hand halts just as you’re about to switch to his other cheek. “This outdoor mall of sorts. They had little shops and… music performers.”

You swallow thickly as you are suddenly bombarded with the realization that you had been thinking far too deeply about Yoongi the previous evening while watching the entertainment behind their instrument or microphone. And because of all those things, you can’t help yourself this time: “You were dressed in all black that night.”

Yoongi shifts his gaze from the table back onto your face, something in his eyes glinting.

“You had such intensity in every word that you spoke into the world, yet when you smiled afterwards at me I… I didn’t know what to think of you. But I knew I wanted to know more. When you asked me out to coffee, your eyes were sparkling. You don’t do that much anymore.” You swallow as the gravity of what you have just said starts to sink in. “Sorry, I think I said too much.”

Yoongi’s hand reaches out to grip at your waist, the gesture so comforting that you unconsciously find yourself consoling in it rather than trying to brush it off. “They don’t sparkle anymore because they haven’t seen anything truly brightening. Until recently.”

You feel as if your whole body is shaking with the weight of intensity, lips parted to let the breath, because you feel as if Yoongi has just laid out all his cards down upon the table…

“What’s there to sort out? I want you to take care of yourself and you want to be happy—god forbid those have started to become two different things entirely!”

“I don’t know what you want me to say. I don’t know what you want me to do. This is my job Y/N, and I can’t start changing things around! I could lose everything!”

“You’ll still have me! You’ll still have me, you fucking moron! Doesn’t that mean anything?”

You close your eyes, reaching your hands out to push Yoongi’s from your waist. You don’t have time to catch the look of hurt that flickers behind orbs before your boss is calling your name, insisting that she needs assistance with organizing the jackets before they are flown off to their new tour location the following day. You ignore Yoongi as you make your way out of the room, down the hall. The jackets is a simple matter, they just need to be pressed one last time, rolled for possible lint, packed and zipped up and you find that you are so distracted that you almost can’t focus entirely on the manner.

It isn’t until you find yourself back out into the hall that you hear a familiar voice calling your name, as you crane your neck slightly to see Hoseok pacing over to you, determined expression upon his face. “Hoseok?”

“Uh, yeah, hey Y/N,” Hoseok says, stopping when he’s right in front of you. You’re surprised to find that he’s not looking at you right now, he’s scratching the back of his neck, the gesture so uncharacteristically nervous that you find that the only thing you can truly do is stand and watch him. “I have to tell you something.”

You blink, titling your head to the side as you watch the boy before you. “What is it?”

“Well, ah, Y/N, I want you to know that I…” The boy takes in a breath, and exhales. “I really enjoy spending time with you. You know that, right?”

You smile uneasily. “Hoseok, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”

“Ever since we first met,” Hoseok continues, fidgeting with his fingers. “I-I guess I’ve always been interested in you. There’s just something about you that’s always lured me towards you, and the more we got to know each other, the more I realized that I really like being with you because you’re funny, you’re sweet and selfless and you always put other people before yourself. Even when people are putting pressure on you, you never let that bother you. Spending time with you and hanging out with you is beyond anything I could have ever imagined.” His face is red, but he finally forces himself to look up at you.

You feel your eyes growing to the side of saucer plates, clearly not having expected this turn of events—although thinking about it, maybe Yoongi was right—!

Your silence is probably some sort of speechless confirmation for Hoseok, because his shaky hands suddenly come up to cup one side of your face. You can feel him drawing closer and closer to you and you find that you are so immobile with a feeling of something that you shut your eyes.

Behind your eyes, however, you see a boy with jet black hair, gummy smile, talent and passion hiding behind the shyness of his own eyes and the thought of the boy is enough to get you to reach out, gently gripping at Hoseok’s shoulder. “Hoseok—wait—!”

The boy pulls back at once. “What?”

Too afraid to admit the truth to his face, you stammer out something: “I-It’s just—your career! You could get into trouble if people found out about us, I work with you, Hoseok.”

“I don’t care about the rules,” He gruffs, trying to go back to kiss you.

“Hoseok, stop—!”

“Get the fuck away from her—didn’t you hear her tell you to stop?” Another familiar voice comes out of practically nowhere, but it makes your heart sing without meaning to as you hear a shove accompanied by Hoseok grunting as the weight of his hand upon your shoulder is suddenly gone and you feel as if you can breath away.

You look up at—“Y-Yoongi.”

“Hyung,” Hoseok shutters, still red in the cheeks, although it’s probably from his confession. “We were just—!”

“Save it,” Yoongi snaps, moving to stand in front of you before he’s suddenly whirling around to face you. “I need to talk to you.” He grabs your wrist and pulls you away before either you or Hoseok could protest the arrangement. So you let yourself be dragged away from the rest of society, down the hall until Yoongi is shouldering open an empty dressing room.

He shoves you in and kicks the door closed, the sound only echoing for a few seconds before it diffuses through the room, leaving only the straining tension of silence behind. You don’t think you’re ready to face Yoongi alone again, especially given what happened the last time the pair of you were alone (besides, look at what happens when you’re not even with the boy but you somehow get plagued with thoughts of him anyway). You wring your hands together as you desperately try to come up with a means of escape.

“You are a fucking moron.”

You snap your gaze up towards Yoongi, only to find that the other boy is positively glaring at you, the heat of his stare feels like hot irons upon your entire body but you don’t care, you really don’t care even though you probably should because—“What did you say?”

Yoongi barks out a laugh. “You heard me.” He takes a bold step forward, and you match him with a few steps forward, sputtering out a curse when the small of your back hits the edge of the larger makeup table in the corner of the dressing room. “I said you’re a fucking moron.”

“Don’t say that to me!” You snap back. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Shoving Hoseok away like that!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did we witness different things a few seconds ago?” Yoongi retorts, not stopping in his approach towards you until he’s standing no more than an inch away from you. “That idiot was about to kiss you! You may not have heard him when he said that he liked you beyond a friend, but I certainly did!” He laughs, but it’s without humor and only makes the blood underneath your skin boil even more. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

“Stop calling me that!”

“But it’s true! You—you never listen to me! You’re an idiot for letting yourself get carried off with Hoseok, leading him into thinking that you have a crush on him by granting him all of those things. You’re an idiot!”

You run a hand through your hair, already feeling the buildup of that headache coming on. “Okay, fine, I may be an accident for not watching the signs as much as I should have. But the fuck do you care so much?”

He gapes. “Are you really asking me that right now?”

“Yes, yes I am!” You retort. “It isn’t your responsibility to take care of me and watch out for me. I didn’t ask for you to do any of that! You’re not my boyfriend anymore, and I’m not some fucking kid you need to watch out for all the time! I don’t need a babysitter! So, let me ask you again, why do you even care him the first place—?”

Your question gets cut off abruptly by the sensation of Yoongi’s mouth against your own, his hands cupping your cheeks as he kisses you hard, all the frustration stacking up in his shoulders being taken out as he nips at your bottom lip. And even though you’re just as angry as he is, perhaps even a little bit more, the sensation of his lips against your own after so long after needing him and thinking about him for so long is enough to drag out the smallest of whimpers as your hands blindly reach up to fist his shirt.

He pulls away first, cheeks flushed and lips swollen as you look at Yoongi and he looks down at you. “You’re a fucking idiot,” He whispers, breath fanning your face, gaze trained on your lips, daring you to make the next move.

“Shut up,” You hiss, moving up to grip at his collar, pulling him back in, determined to drag out his insults with your own tongue.

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | epilogue

[minijenn]

Universe Falls Chapter 29

Welp, I’m dead. This chapter fucking killed me with both its length and its intensity. Still, I hope you all enjoy it, seeing as how I hyped the ever loving fuck out of it. So here we finally are, for your reading pleasure: Revenge Trip!

Previous: http://minijenn.tumblr.com/post/156721748044/universe-falls-chapter-28

Chapter 29: Revenge Trip

4-15-14-20 5-22-5-18 21-14-4-5-18-5-19-20-9-13-1-20-5 20-8-9-14-7-19 20-8-1-20 13-9-7-8-20 2-5 7-18-5-1-20 20-8-5-25 19-5-5 20-8-5-13-19-5-12-22-5-19 23-9-20-8 12-9-20-20-12-5 23-15-18-20-8 2-21-20 23-8-1-20 20-8-5-25'12-12 4-15 3-15-21-12-4 19-1-22-5 20-8-5 5-1-18-20-8

“Well, ladies and gentlemen, we’ve just about reached the end of our tour,” Stan concluded as he addressed the large crowd of tourists crowded right outside the shack. The conman grinned broadly as he heard the collective sighs of disappointment from the enthralled guests, knowing he had them right where he wanted them. “I know, I know. It’s a shame such a good time has to end. But… just because you folks have been such a good audience, I’ll let you all get a glimpse at one last exhibit. What do ya say?”

Of course, the crowd cheered in pleading support of this idea, prompting Stan to comply and continue on to the curtained off area ahead. “Well, if you say so…” he said with a coy smirk. “But I should warn you: this isn’t for the faint of heart. Because right behind this curtain, is a real, 100% genuine living dinosaur!”

The tourists gasped in awed anticipation, their cameras already raised to snap photos of the rumored creature. Which was why Stan wasted no more time keeping any of them in suspense. “Here he is! The one, the only: Compy the Compso—Compa—Compasaort—Dipper!” the conman shouted, hoping his nephew could fill him in with a proper pronunciation. “What’s it called again?!”

“It’s ‘Compsognathus’!” Dipper corrected, briefly poking his head outside of the shack.

“Yeah, what he said,” Stan said to the tourists. “Anyway, behold!” Without any further ado, the conman lifted the curtain to where the supposed dinosaur was contained. Stan prided himself on swiping a small dino egg the other day during the gang’s journey in the abandoned mines. And, as he had hoped, the egg had hatched a baby compsognathus, a dinosaur that likely wouldn’t grow beyond the size of a chicken, but a dinosaur nonetheless. And given its small size and generally non-violent demeanor, Stan saw the miniature creature as a prime attraction, especially since “Compy” just so happened to be quite the little pick pocket himself. The conman had already profited quite a bit off of the baby dinosaur, and he was poised to do so again as he unveiled it to the anxiously awaiting crowd.

However, Stan’s wide grin turned to a confused frown upon hearing the crowd’s shocked gasps turn into angry boos. Alarmed, the conman quickly spun around to see that the enclosure he usually kept Compy in was completely empty, save for the dinosaur’s small haul of stolen watches and credit cards. But the creature itself had vanished, the only sign of its escape being the back of the gate of its enclosure had been somehow torn off.

“What?!” Stan shouted, aghast. However, things quickly turned from bad to worse as the tourists voiced their enraged dissent.

“I can’t believe this!”

“What a rip off!”

“I want my money back!”

“W-wait, no!” Stan exclaimed, trying his best to calm his outraged patrons. Unfortunately, it was to no avail as they all collectively stormed off, leaving the conman very distraught over his sudden loss of profits. “Kids!”

There was just enough heated rage behind Stan’s bellow to prompt both of the twins to come running out of the shack, both of them startled yet quite curious to see what all the fuss was about. “Grunkle Stan, what’s wrong?” Mabel asked with apt concern.

“Do you need to hear how to pronounce compsognathus again?” Dipper asked, crossing his arms. “Because I literally just told you.

“I wish,” Stan scoffed coldly. “You two runts notice anything missing back there?” he asked, nodding to the empty enclosure.

“Whoa, hey, yeah!” Mabel exclaimed, running up to the side of the enclosure. “Compy’s gone! What happened? Did he go for his lunch break?”

“Or did he just finally pick the lock and make a break for it?” Dipper suggested much more rationally.

“That’s just it! There’s no way he could have busted out!” the conman grumbled hotly. “I had Soos rig this thing to be foolproof! And dinosaur proof! Somebody tore that gate off on purpose. And no one around here is resting until I found out who!”

“Yo, Stan!” Amethyst called as she jumped onto the scene quite out of nowhere.

“Not now, Amethyst,” Stan quickly brushed her off. “We’re kind of in the middle of a crisis here!”

“Oh what, you mean your missing baby dinosaur crisis?” she asked knowingly. “Well then, you might wanna take a look at this. Found it nearby on the way down here.” The purple Gem handed the conman a small slip of paper, one that he proceeded to read aloud to the kids.

“Dear Stanford,” Stan began reading, squinting at the tiny writing. “Hope ‘ya’ll’ don’t mind me fixing your gate for you. I thought your newest attraction could use some extra roaming space. But look on the bright side. With that curious creature gone, all your customers are bound to come on down to my ‘lil’ ol Tent of Telepathy instead! Warmest regards: Lil Gideon.”

“You guys ready to see something funny?” Amethyst whispered to the twins the second Stan finished reading. “Wait for it… In three… two… one..”

“GIDEON!” Stan shouted, completely infuriated as he crumpled the child psychic’s spiteful note in his fist. While Dipper and Mabel were quite startled by this, Amethyst simply let out an amused chuckle at the conman’s frustration, especially as he threw the note down petulantly. “That four foot, pig-nosed, pompadour-pedaling little creep! Why, I oughta skin him alive for letting Compy out! That dinosaur was the attraction of a lifetime and now he’s gone thanks to that phony!”

“Aw, don’t be so upset, Grunkle Stan,” Mabel encouraged sweetly. “I’m sure Compy’s still around here somewhere! We’ll even help you find him, right Dipper?”

“Uh, yeah. I mean, he can’t be too hard to find,” Dipper shrugged. “You could probably track him by the trail of spare pocket change he’s always dropping.”

“I appreciate the thought, kids, but chances are Compy’s long gone by now,” Stan said with genuine disappointment. “Gideon probably pried that gate open last night when we were all asleep. I knew I should have had Soos stand guard out here all night!”

“Geez, Stan, don’t be such a sadsack about it,” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “Look at it this way. Sure, Gideon’s a clever little punk who ruined your new attraction and has a way flashier setup than yours. But you still have something that he doesn’t.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?” Stan asked caustically.

“Oh wait… you wanted me to give you an answer to that?” the purple Gem asked with a frown. “Because I thought you would have one.”

“That’s not helping, Amethyst,” the conman said dryly. He paused for a moment, however, upon stealing a glance up at the temple. “Uh, speaking of not helping… have you seen your place lately?”

“Huh?” Amethyst turned around, confused, at first, before gasping at what she saw. She hadn’t noticed it upon emerging from the temple earlier, but now she could clearly see that the entire stony surface of the massive statue, save for the house below it, had been somehow coated in a rather obnoxious shade of pink paint, compete with a layer of shining glitter thrown on top. The purple Gem’s jaw dropped in absolute shock upon seeing such an alarming sight, and while both Stan and Dipper stared at it in apt bewilderment, Mabel let out a delighted gasp over it.

“Oh my gosh! The temple looks so pretty in pink!” she quipped brightly. “When did you guys paint it?”

“We didn’t,” Amethyst shook her head, still absolutely befuddled. “Besides, even if we did ever paint it, we wouldn’t-”

“AMETHYST!” the purple Gem didn’t have time to finish her remark before Pearl’s very loud, very angry shout coming from up the hill.

“Oh boy…” Amethyst cringed, already anticipating the white Gem’s inevitable rant. “I better run on up there before Pearl gets a crack in her gem. See you guys around. And hey, who knows? Maybe your missing dinosaur will turn up somewhere after all.”

“Yeah, maybe he will,” Stan deadpanned as Amethyst leapt off to head up to the temple. “Especially since you two munchkins are gonna go out there looking for him,” he said to the twins.

“Wait. By ourselves?” Dipper asked with a frown.

“You’re not gonna help us, Grunkle Stan?” Mabel questioned with a slight pout.

“Ha! You kids really think I have time to run around the woods searching for that thing?” Stan scoffed. “I gotta stick around here and get that fence fixed now, all because that skunk Gideon has to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong. Now what are you two doing just standing around here gawking for?” he asked the twins harshly, already ushering them off. “You got a compo-whatever to find. And don’t come back until you do!”

The twins simply exchanged an exasperated glance as they headed off into the forest, neither of them entirely sure how they were going to find, much less capture the baby compsognathus, despite the conman’s orders.

Amethyst let out a long sigh as she caught sight of Pearl, Garnet, and Steven standing before the now-pink temple. The elder two Gems looked far from pleased as they looked over the sight, though Steven glanced up at it in apt amazement, still wondering how such a thing could have happened in the first place.

“Oh, there you are, Amethyst!” Pearl huffed impatiently as the purple Gem arrived. “Care to explain this little disaster?”

“Uh, the temple’s pink, dude,” Amethyst shrugged. “Anyone with eyes could see that. Duh.”

“No, that’s not-” the white Gem cut herself off with a frustrated groan. “What I meant was, what in the world possessed you to do something as ridiculous as painting the entire temple?!”

“Wait… you guys think I did this?” the purple Gem asked in disbelief.

“Wouldn’t be the first time you did something like this,” Garnet noted stoically.

“Yeah…” Steven agreed with an apprehensive frown. “There was that time you filled the entire house with golf balls… Or that April Fool’s you washed all my clothes and shrunk them in the dryer on purpose…”

“Or the time you emptied a box of cicadas into my room!” Pearl interjected with an angry scowl.

“Or the time you broke the microwave trying to stuff it full of pinecones,” Garnet added.

“Or-”

“Ok, ok! I get it!” Amethyst interrupted, thoroughly annoyed. “Sometimes I get a little carried away with my pranks and end up making some pretty big messes. I know that. But do you guys really think I would waste so much time painting the temple pink just to get a quick laugh out of it?”

“Yes,” Garnet, Pearl, and Steven all answered in perfect unison.

“Amethyst,” the Gem leader said, her tone calm yet firm. “We understand that sometimes your emotions get the better of you and that acting out is the only way you can vent those emotions. But sometimes, you take things too far. And this is definitely one of those times.”

“But I didn’t do it!” Amethyst argued adamantly. “I’m serious! Steven, you believe me, right?!”

“Uh… well…” the young Gem frowned, not really sure what to think. After all, the evidence stacked against the purple Gem was pretty high, especially considering her countless past offenses.

“Oh come on!” Amethyst groaned, growing more desperate by the second. “You guys can’t be serious! I promise, I didn’t do this!”

“Well if you didn’t do it, then who did?” Pearl asked caustically.

“Uh… I don’t…” the purple Gem bit her lip, glancing around for a moment before gasping as she glanced down at the Mystery Shack and remembered something important. “It was Gideon!”

“Gideon?” Steven asked with a confused frown. “But he hasn’t really that bad since the whole thing with the size crystal and the Watermelon Stevens a few weeks ago. What makes you think he did this?”

“Because he just punked Stan too!” Amethyst exclaimed earnestly. “Gideon let Stan’s new attraction loose, a-and he even left a note about it behind saying he did it! Heck, if you guys need proof, then I can even have Stan vouch for me!”

“Oh because Stan is definitely a reliable source,” Pearl rolled her eyes.

“So what, are you saying that little punk wouldn’t do something like this?” the purple Gem asked harshly. “I mean, the kid’s made it pretty clear that he hates us. Messing with our temple like this would be jus up his dumb little alley.”

“We’re not saying he couldn’t have,” Garnet said. “But there’s just no real proof.”

“So basically… what you’re saying is that I’m getting the blame for this?!”

“For now, yes,” the Gem leader nodded. “At least until we figure out who really did this.”

“Which means,” Pearl added pointedly. “You’re the one responsible for cleaning this little ‘mess’ up, Amethyst.”

“Aw, what?!” Amethyst exclaimed in complete dismay. “You guys can’t be for real right now! You want me to clean the entire temple?!”

“Yes,” Garnet affirmed coldly.

“But that’ll take hours!”

“Well then, that leaves you with plenty of time to contemplate the consequences of your actions while you work,” Pearl remarked. “And maybe next time, you’ll think twice about doing something so… destructive and defiant!”

“I told you, I didn’t-” Amethyst cut herself off with a heavy sigh, knowing that Garnet and Pearl weren’t going to believe her, no matter what she said. “You know what? Who cares? I’ll clean the stupid temple. Even though I shouldn’t have to.”

“Taking responsibility for your actions is an important lesson to learn, Amethyst,” Garnet said as her and Pearl started to head inside. “You’ll thank us for this later.”

“No I won’t,” Amethyst scowled, kicking a rock once the two elder Gems were out of earshot.

“Aw, I’m sorry, Amethyst,” Steven frowned sympathetically. “To be honest, I… kinda don’t think you did this either… Though I guess there really is no way to know for sure.”

“Pfft, come on, Steven, I didn’t do this,” Amethyst reiterated. “That tiny dork Gideon did, I’m sure of it. If only I could make Garnet and Pearl see that. Or better yet, get back at that little runt for it…” The purple Gem scowled petulantly as she crossed her arms and glanced down. However, she was only silent for a moment before an idea struck her, one that would certainly satisfy one of those conditions. “That’s it!”

“What’s it?” Steven asked curiously.

Amethyst sucked in a sharp breath upon hearing this question, seeing as how she had forgotten the young Gem was even there. “Oh uh… nothin’. I… I just thought of a way to… clean the temple up really fast! Yeah.”

“Oh… well, do you want some help?” the young Gem offered selflessly. “Because between the two of us, I’m sure we could get it done a lot faster!”

“Nah, Steven, I got this,” Amethyst waved him off, glancing down to the Mystery Shack with a sly smirk. “Or should I say… we got this…”

Stan let out a long sigh as he finished off another can of Pitt Cola. Though had already sent the twins to bed roughly an hour ago, the conman stayed up and lamented the loss of his premier attraction by his lonesome. After hours of searching, Dipper and Mabel had finally returned with the unfortunate assurance that Compy was indeed gone for good, much to Stan’s deep disappointment. Not only had the conman lost plenty of customers thanks to Gideon’s underhanded scheme, but he had also lost any potential money the miniature dinosaur could have brought in for him in the future. And for someone who loved profits as much as Stan did, it was certainly a heavy blow.

“Ugh…” Stan finally groaned to himself indignantly. “Stupid Gideon…. Always ruining everything…”

“Tell me about it.” The conman perked up, surprised as he looked over to see Amethyst perched in the nearby open windowsill. A cross expression rested on her face as she reclined, her arms crossed and her entire body covered in flecks of pink paint and glitter.

“What are you doing down here so late?” Stan asked her, hardly even surprised by her sudden appearance. After all, this was far from the first time she had broken into the shack under the cover of night. “And what happened to you? You look like one of Mabel’s arts and crafts projects.”

The purple Gem blew her hair out of her eye with a huff as she jumped down at headed over to take a seat at the table across from Stan. “I just spent the past seven hours scrubbing paint off the temple because apparently Garnet and Pearl think I made the place all pink and sparkly,” she scowled, taking the conman’s empty soda can and swallowing it whole. “Of course, I didn’t do it. But you wanna know who I think did?”

“Let me take a wild guess…”

“Gideon,” the both answered with equal disdain for the child psychic.

“Ugh, that pint sized psychic is a real pain in the neck,” Stan remarked bitterly. “Who does he think he is, anyway? Messing with us. Somebody really oughta teach that kid a lesson.”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking…” Amethyst said with a growing smirk.

“Oh really?” the conman asked, somewhat intrigued. “And what did you have in mind?”

“Oh, nothing much,” the purple Gem shrugged casually, though it was clear her zeal was starting to get the better of her. “I just figured maybe finally it’s time for another one of our good old fashioned… Revenge Trips?”

Stan’s interest immediately pattered out as soon as he heard this. “No.”

“What? Come on!” Amethyst urged. “It’s been years since we’ve gone out on one! Don’t tell me you haven’t been itching for a wild night of righting wrongs, taking names, and getting even! You and me used to be revenge masters, remember?!”

“Yeah that’s just it, we used to be,” Stan pointed out solidly. “We haven’t pulled a Revenge Trip in over fourteen years now. And even back in the day when we used to do them every week, something would always go wrong. I told you after the last time we got arrested that I’m done with those.”

“Pfft, since when did you get so old and lame?” the purple Gem rolled her eyes. “So what if we got busted a few times? It’s like you always used to say: ‘no pain, no gain’. And we gained a lot back in our revenge days. You can’t deny that.”

“Heh, yeah we did,” Stan remarked with a small, reminiscent smile. It quickly faded however when he noticed the coy grin Amethyst was giving him. “B-but we can’t go on another Revenge Trip. Not now. Things around here… they aren’t like they used to be.”

“Oh yeah? How?” Amethyst asked, raising a suspicious eyebrow.

“Uh… well… I… I got the twins to worry about now. What if something happened on our Revenge Trip, huh? Who’d take care of ‘em?”

“They don’t live here all the time, do they?” the purple Gem reminded caustically. She let out a teasing laugh as she threw her voice to mimic the conman. “‘Oh, look at me! I’m Stan and I’ve turned into such a huge softie all because I took in two kids for the summer’. Chill out, dude,” she remarked in her usual voice. “Dipper and Mabel would be alright. They’d just get sent home or whatever. No biggie."

Stan let out a harsh scoff at this, glaring rather coldly at Amethyst upon hearing this. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, the thought of the twins being sent home because of his own misdeeds was a rather unsavory one. “Sure, ‘no biggie’,” he repeated sullenly. “By the way, don’t you have your own little munchkin to worry about?”

“What, you mean Steven?” Amethyst asked, glancing away briefly. “He’ll be fine if something happened to me. Heck, he’d probably be better off with just Garnet and Pearl taking care of him anyway.”

The conman’s expression softened as he noticed how suddenly forlorn the purple Gem was. “Hey, uh… you know the kids told me about your little trip to the Kindergarten last week…” he said rather hesitantly. “Is… is that what this is really all about?”

“What? No!” Amethyst retorted harshly. “This has nothing to do with the Kindergarten thing! This isn’t about ‘blowing off steam’ or anything stupid like that! No, you know what this is really about, Stan, just as much as I do. It’s about revenge!”

“Wouldn’t be a Revenge Trip if it was about anything else,” Stan noted with a small grin.

“And it won’t be a Revenge Trip if I try to roll solo,” the purple Gem huffed in annoyance. “Come on, Stan. I know you wanna go do this, even if you’re acting like you don’t. The look on Gideon’s face will be priceless once we get even with him! It’ll totally be worth it.”

“It won’t be if we get caught.”

“Then we just won’t get caught. Don’t tell me that you miss the thrill of going out on the road, the excitement of sneaking in and out of places, the sweet reward of sticking it to the man! You used to be all about that kind of stuff before you got all old and boring.”

“Hey, hey, hey! Who said anything about me being old and boring?” Stan protested.

“You did by saying you don’t wanna go,” Amethyst retorted, knowing she was getting close to convincing him. “Never would have pegged you to be such a scaredy cat, Stan. Especially given your track record. But I guess it was bound to happen eventually. You just can’t keep up with me anymore.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah!”

“Well, I think you’re wrong!” the conman exclaimed, slamming a fist down on the table petulantly. “I could keep up with you just as easily now as I used to way back when!”

“Then prove it!” Amethyst challenged, jumping onto the table herself.

“Fine! Then I will!”

“So you’re in?”

Stan let out a deep, frustrated breath as he glared down at the hand Amethyst was extended to him, catching the clever smirk she was sending his way. He knew that this would likely be a risky endeavor, perhaps one of their most dangerous Revenge Trips yet, given their history with Gideon. But still, he had never been able to turn one of Amethyst’s dares down. And this one was certainly no exception. “I’m in!” he exclaimed, firmly shaking her hand to solidify their plans.

“YEAH!” Amethyst shouted excitedly, jumping up and down on the table happily as the conman simply smirked in subtle satisfaction. “Stan and Amethyst are BACK in business, baby! Revenge Trip, here we come!”

As with all of their infamous Revenge Trips, planning was by far the quickest and easiest part for Stan and Amethyst to get through first. It wasn’t their custom to leave any stone unturned in their escapades, which was why they had conceived a two-fold revenge scheme against Gideon, one that they were certain would even the playing field and then some. Still, before they set out, they had to make sure to gather the proper supplies; after all, there was no room for error in a Revenge Trip, as the pair had learned several times over.

“Ok, so Greg agreed to foot the bail this time in case things do go wrong,” Stan said as he hung the phone up. “Apparently he expects me to ‘pay him back’ this time or somethin’. I dunno.”

“I don’t even know why you bothered to ask him anyway. I already told you, nothing’s gonna go wrong,” Amethyst scoffed as she continued laying their tools of the trade out on the table. Hammers, screwdrivers, and crowbars were only a small part of the extensive collection that also consisted of gloves, gaffers tape, rope, magnifying glasses, flashlights, sponges, and more. Neither of them were exactly sure what they would definitively need until they were actually out in the field, but still, there was no harm in going prepared.

“Still, we’re better safe than sorry,” Stan remarked, crossing his arms as he looked over their supplies.

“Geez, Stan, since when did you start caring so much about the fuzz?” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “You were the guy who crashed his car into the side of the jail just to break me out, remember?”

“I sure do,” Stan couldn’t help but chuckle fondly over the memory. “And then the next time around, you shapeshifted into a bulldozer and broke me out.”

“Hey, you know I always come through,” Amethyst smirked proudly. “Still… we’ve had some pretty wild Revenge Trips. You can’t imagine how hyped I am to finally be going on another one after all these years!”

“Yeah, well save that hype for the road,” Stan chuckled, amused. “Cause the last thing I wanna do is wake the-”

“Grunkle Stan?”

Stan and Amethyst both froze as they turned to the threshold of the kitchen, where a very tired Dipper and Mabel stood, both of them looking to the pair in apt confusion.

“Uh… yo, you guys,” Amethyst greeted with a forced grin. “What’s up?”

“I feel like we should be asking you guys that question instead,” Dipper said with a yawn. “What are you doing with all that stuff?”

“Are you guys gonna go rob a bank?” Mabel asked curiously. “And if so, can we come! I’ve always wanted to be an accomplice in a high-stakes bank robbery, just like in the movies!”

“Yeesh, kid, we ain’t robbing any banks tonight,” Stan informed dryly. “We’re just going to take care of a little… personal business.”

“At 11 o’clock at night?” Dipper asked, glancing over at the clock.

The conman and the purple Gem exchanged an uneasy glance, neither of them really sure how to respond, seeing as how they had been caught on the spot like this. Still, as usual, Stan was the one who came through with an expectantly snappy response. “Yeah, maybe. What’s it to you, kid? I’m a grown adult and Amethyst is a… grown magical rock person. Which means we’re allowed to be out as late as we want and do whatever we want while we’re out.”

“Oooo, you guys are gonna do something super mischievous, aren’t you?” Mabel asked with an intrigued grin.

“We don’t know,” Amethyst shrugged vaguely. “It depends.”

“Depends on what?” Dipper asked, still quite confused.

“Depends on a whole lot of none of your business,” Stan retorted crossly. “Now why don’t you two just run on back to bed and pretend like this was all just a weird dream, k?”

“Yeah, and don’t go telling Pearl or Garnet about any of this,” Amethyst added firmly. “It’ll just be our little secret, got it?”

The twins looked to each other, quite bewildered by how mysterious the pair was being. Still, it was quite clear that both Stan and Amethyst were irresolute in giving away any concrete answers about their plans, which was why Dipper and Mabel decided that all they could really do was give up. “Fine,” Dipper said, turning with a relenting sigh. “We’ll go and leave you guys to whatever most-likely illegal thing you plan on doing.”

“Good luck with it!” Mabel exclaimed brightly as she began to follow her brother out. “Oh, wait, Amethyst, can I tell Steven about this?”

“No, because he’ll tell Garnet and Pearl,” Amethyst shook her head rigidly.

“Aw… ok…” Mabel sighed as she left. “Still, he’d think it’s so cool!” Stan and Amethyst waited for a moment or two, making sure to listen for the sounds of the twins going back upstairs and climbing into bed before letting out a shared sigh of relief.

“Yikes, that was a close one,” Stan remarked, crossing his arms. “I thought those twerps were never gonna leave.”

“Well, at least you managed to drive them off,” Amethyst laughed. “Guess you are still as smooth as you used to be. Still, it doesn’t prove that you can still handle a crazy, high-stakes, fast-paced night on the run.”

“Well then I guess there’s only one way to find out,” Stan smirked daringly, spinning his car keys on his finger deftly. “Let’s roll.”

Amethyst could barely contain her excitement as she hopped into the passenger’s seat of Stan’s car. The conman himself was a bit calmer as he got into the car himself, though he still smirked in amusement as the purple Gem jumped up and down in her seat.

“What are we waiting for?” Amethyst asked eagerly as Stan turned the key in the ignition. “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go! We’re burning moonlight!”

“Geez, hold your horses!” Stan laughed as he pulled the car into motion. “The Revenge Trip hasn’t even started yet.”

“I know, but I can’t help it! I’m just so pumped! Tonight is gonna be legendary!”

“Sure, just as long as we don’t get caught.”

“Come on,” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “I already told you. Nobody’s catchin’ us. We’re way smarter than like, anyone in this lame old town. That’s why they call us the Kings of Revenge!”

“Oh yeah? Who calls us that?” Stan asked, raising an eyebrow.

The purple Gem paused for a moment, glancing down with a thoughtful frown before perking up once more. “I do!”

The pair shared a hearty laugh over this, one that eventually petered into a contented sigh as they drove down the dark, empty, narrow road. The sparse streetlights and the dim moonlight beaming down from above gave the road ahead a mysterious, yet somehow comforting vibe, one that Stan and Amethyst hadn’t really seen since their last Revenge Trip years ago. And experiencing it all again now certainly brought about more than enough nostalgic feelings for them both.

“Heh, I kinda forgot how nice this feels,” Stan remarked, hardly paying any mind to his speed as the car careened down the empty street. “Nothin’ but the open road and revenge schemes… It just sorta takes ya back to the good ol’ days, you know?”

“Yeah, I do,” Amethyst readily agreed. “Oh man, remember that one time we got revenge on ol’ Dewey for that zoning ordinance he put on the shack?”

“Of course!” the conman chuckled. “People around here still talk about how his dumb van was blaring ‘Mayor Screwy’ for a whole week! What a classic! Still, nothing compares to the time we pushed Toby Determined’s car into the lake for that stupid article he published about you Gems.”

“Hey, it served him right,” the purple Gem crossed her arms and smirked in satisfaction. “Dude should have known better than to try and get all up in our personal biz. But yeah, that was one of the best ones…” Amethyst sighed as she propped her arm against the car door and looked out the window with a contented smile. “Hey, Stan?” she spoke up after a moment of silence. “You still remember the night we met?”

Stan let out a small laugh at this, shaking his head but keeping his eyes on the road nonetheless. “Please. How could I forget that mess?”

22 years ago…

“Good night, ladies and gentlemen! Thanks for visiting the Murder Hut! And remember: we put the ‘fun’ in ‘no refunds’!” Stan exclaimed boisterously as he waved the last group of tourists out of the gift shop. He let out a tired sigh as he closed the door behind them, pinching the bridge of his nose as his grin faded into an exhausted scowl. “Sheesh, I thought they’d never leave.”

Since Stan had given Greg the rare day off today, he held the full responsibility of closing up shop for the day, which certainly wasn’t helped by the long night up that no doubt awaited him. Still, the conman dully attended to his duties of locking the shop up and making sure everything was in order for the next day. The good part about Greg being off for the night was that Stan wouldn’t have to waste time exchanging pleasantries with him in sending him off. After grabbing a quick bite to eat out of the fridge, he could easily head down and get right to work on what was really important.

After putting his fez down on the counter for the night, Stan headed for the kitchen to grab his rushed dinner, only to be caught off guard by an abrupt, quite loud crash from right outside. The conman had been around long enough to know that anything suspicious like this was enough to raise his guard over, especially considering his circumstances. To be fair, Stan had been on edge for quite some time now, though he honestly had every reason to be, considering he owned a surprisingly profitable business so far out in the woods. Not to mention the personal project he had been hard at work on, one that countless people would love to discover or get their hands on…

Acting quickly yet quietly, Stan crept to the side door, briefly glancing out the window first only to find no one immediately there. Still, he was hardly relieved by that fact alone. Making sure his fists were at the ready for a fight, the conman slowly opened the door, tucking just out of sight behind it as he surveyed the lawn. Still nothing. The area was silent, dark, and serene as always. Stan was just about ready to accept that his caution was mere paranoia and he had just been hearing things, until he happened to hear a soft rattle coming from the nearby trashcan.

While Stan’s initial assumption was that it was just a mere racoon or other wild animal, he still didn’t really want to take his chances with it. Which was why he carefully reached for the baseball bat he kept shoved under the couch on the porch before slowly approaching the trashcan, ready to swing.

However, before he could even really get to close to the rattling can, it happened to suddenly topple over, eliciting a startled cry from both the conman and the small purple figure who rolled out of the can and onto the ground. Stan stilled his bat from swinging upon realizing that it was a person, or at least he thought. Her small, stocky body and short, scruffy lavender hair were covered in filth, most likely from the garbage she had just been rooting through. Still, her eyes were bright and a wide grin was on her face as she looked over the stack of crushed soda cans she had gathered.

“Hey, buddy,” she said to Stan, who could only stare down at her, completely dumbfounded. “Mind kicking that can over here? These babies aren’t gonna eat themselves.”

“Uh… sure?” Stan shrugged in confusion, kicking the empty can near his feet over to her.

“Thanks, old guy!” the girl quipped happily, tossing it into her mouth and swallowing it whole. Yet as much as Stan was disturbed by this, he knew there was a much more pressing question that needed to be asked. Two actually.

“Hold it!” the conman exclaimed, still not letting his guard down at the sight of his diminutive intruder. “Who the heck do you think you are and why were you rummaging through my trash? You know I could call the cops on you for this sorta thing. If I wasn’t going to just fine you for it myself instead.”

“Whoa, wait a sec,” the girl exclaimed, jumping to her feet and letting the cans spill all around her. “Your trash? You mean you live here?”

“Uh… yeah,” Stan replied, though there was a hint of hesitance in his tone before adding more confidence to it. “Yes, I do. Why, you got a problem with that, kid?”

“Kid?” she chuckled, quite amused. “I’m way older than you, old guy. But still, this is crazy! Rose always says nobody lives down here, but what do ya know?! And here I was, thinking it was Music Man coming down here and squatting all the time, but no! It was you! …Whoever you are.”

“Wait, wait, wait, did you just mention… Rose?!” Stan asked, suddenly alarmed.

“Uh yeah,” the girl rolled her eyes. “Why, do you know her? Because everybody knows Rose. Especially me, and Garnet, and Pearl! Oh, and Music Man too, I guess.”

“Then that means… you must be one of those Crystal Crones who live up in that statue on the hill!” the conman exclaimed hotly.

“Sure am!” she proclaimed proudly. “Though we’re really called the Crystal Gems. But I get it. You humans aren’t always the best at pronouncing junk. At least that’s what Pearl is always saying.”

“Beat it, kid!” Stan snapped harshly, pointing up to the temple. “Your kind isn’t welcome around here!”

“Aw, what?” the purple Gem asked, dismayed. “But we just became friends!”

“Friends?!” the conman scoffed. “Please. I wouldn’t be friends with any of you ‘Gems’ if my life depended on it! I don’t want anything to do with any of ya! Now go scamper on back to your giant eight-armed statue before I have you run in for trespassing!”

The purple Gem simply looked to him with a confusion of slight expression, before shrugging in apparent relent. “K, fine. Whatever you say, old guy.”

Stan watched sullenly, his hands on his hips, as the Gem turned and began making her way back up to her temple home. She did stop on the edge of the yard, however, and cast a somewhat unreadable glance back at him, to which he simply responded with another dismissive wave of his hand. The purple Gem shrugged once more as she disappeared into the woods, leaving the conman satisfied enough that she was gone for him to head back into the house.

However, Stan had no sooner shut the door than something suddenly dropped right onto his shoulders, frightening him a great deal, especially as a pair of hands covered his eyes. “What the-?!” he shouted, stumbling around in an attempt to get whatever was sitting on his shoulders off.

Meanwhile, the purple Gem let out a rosaceous laugh as she gladly remained on her perch, having the time of her life as she watched this strange new human panic over her prank. “Ha! Gotcha! Guess you weren’t ready for a sneak attack, old guy!”

After what felt like several minutes of struggling, Stan finally managed to shove the Gem off of his back, glaring frustrated daggers at her as she landed on the floor with another playful laugh. “Well, that was fun!” she remarked, smirking. “Don’t ya think?”

“No!” Stan shouted, infuriated by this point. “Now get the heck outta my house!”

“Oh come on,” the purple Gem rolled her eyes. “You don’t really want me to go, do ya? Seems like this place is pretty boring and lonely. I could totally liven things up for you! If your beef really is with us Gems, then don’t worry! I’m not like Garnet, or Pearl, or even Rose, I promise! Cause unlike them, wherever I go, I bring the party!”

“I don’t care! I don’t want a party or company or anything else! All I want is for you to leave and never ever come back here! Got it?”

The purple Gem pouted insincerely for a moment before flopping down onto the floor lazily. “Nah… I think I’m just gonna hang around here for a while.” With another laugh, she threw her arms up towards the ceiling, watching the conman’s shocked expression in amusement as she shapeshifted them long enough so that they wrapped around the high support beam. With little difficulty, she shortened them a bit, but not all the way; just enough so that she was hanging from the ceiling almost like a hammock. “Get it? Hang around? Ha!”

“H-how did you…?” Stan began to ask, before quickly shaking his head clear of the amazement. “You know what? It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you’re outta here, purple. Or else.”

“Or else what?” she asked with a coy, challenging smirk as she continued to lazily hang.

“O-or… or I’ll-”

“Ha! I knew you didn’t have anything!” the purple Gem chuckled, dropping down from the ceiling. “You humans are so funny when you try to act all tough like that!” Once again, she shapeshifted, this time into Stan himself as she mimicked his gruff tone. “‘Oh, you better get on outta here, purple. Or else I’ll… I’ll uh… do nothing!’” The purple Gem had worked herself into a fit of laughter by this point, completely ignoring the conman’s awe and subsequent frustration as she reverted to her original form.  

“Yeesh, you Gems are even more annoying than I thought…” Stan grumbled indignantly as the purple Gem continued to laugh at his expense.

“So, you got a name, old guy?” she asked curiously, still reclining on the floor.

“Yeah, I got a name for ya,” Stan scowled. “It’s amscray before I call the cops.”

“Huh, kind of a weird name, but whatever,” she shrugged. “K, Amscray-Before-I-Call-The-Cops, I’m Amethyst. Nice to meet ya!”

“Pleasure’s all mine,” the conman deadpanned, rolling his eyes.

“So, what do you wanna do now?” Amethyst asked with an eager grin. “Eat some more cans? Cause you got plenty of cans out there and I don’t wanna hog ‘em all to myself if you want any. That’d just be rude.”

Stan’s scowl faded into a sly smirk as a sudden idea came to him, one that could hopefully rid him of this annoying intruder at least for a while. “Actually, yeah, let’s do that,” he agreed, feigning interest. “Why don’t you head on out there and grab the rest of them up for us?”

“Sure thing, Amscray-Before-I-Call-The-Cops!” Amethyst readily hopped to her feet and headed for the door. “Oh man, we’re gonna have such a great time! I-” The purple Gem was abruptly cut off as Stan slammed the door behind her the moment she stepped outside. A shocked gasp escaped her as she angrily turned around, pounding the door in a futile attempt to get back in. “Hey! Amscray!”

“Yeah, that’s right!” Stan called with a satisfied smirk as he walked away from the door. “Just amscray back up to your little statue and your ‘perfect’ Rose. And stay the heck outta my hair! Goodbye, good riddance!” The conman heaved an exasperated sigh as he headed back to the gift shop. “And if I never see another Gem again, it’ll be too soon.”

Amethyst raised a confused eyebrow as she glanced out the window to see that Stan was veering off of their intended course and into the suburbs instead. “Uh… Stan? Where are we going?”

“What?” the conman frowned, glancing over at her. “You said so yourself. For our plan to work, we’re gonna need a good backdrop. And there’s only one artist I trust with getting us that backdrop.”

“Wait…” A wide grin spread across the purple Gem’s face as she realized what he was implying. “You don’t mean…”

“That’s right,” Stan nodded with a smirk. “We’re heading to V’s place.”

Amethyst let out a loud, excited cheer at this, one that lasted pretty much until they arrived at their destination. Zealous as always, the purple Gem rushed to the door of the house and eagerly knocked on it while Stan followed not too far behind. “Oh man, V’s gonna be so surprised to see us!” Amethyst exclaimed. “Well… at least me.”

“Hey, me and V always got along just fine,” Stan said defensively.

“Yeah, but were you ever her muse?” the purple Gem snickered playfully.

Before the conman really had a chance to respond, the door abruptly swung open, revealing a middle-aged woman. Her hair was worn in a short, thick bob while she was clad in a green artist’s smock and red slippers. And while there was both exhaustion and confusion written all over her face, the most startling thin about her was the shotgun she wielded as she faced off against whoever had knocked on her door.

“Who’s there?!” she shouted fiercely. “It’s almost midnight! You can’t just-” She stopped dead in her tracks, her jaw and her gun dropping as she noticed the familiar pair standing on her doorstep. “Whoa, hold it… Amethyst?! Stan?!”

“Vidalia!” Amethyst exclaimed happily, rushing to embrace her old friend.

“I can’t believe it!” the woman, Vidalia, exclaimed, hugging Amethyst as she glanced to Stan in disbelieve. “It’s been years since I’ve seen you guys.”

“Tell me about it,” Stan remarked with a small, yet fond grin.

“Man, you’ve changed!” Amethyst laughed as she looked Vidalia up and down. “You look terrible!”

“You look the same…” Vidalia mused before breaking into a joking grin. “Terrible! And Stan, well, I don’t even think I need to touch on how you look.”

“Yeah, yeah,” the conman rolled his eyes, even if he did let out a small laugh. “Good to see your personality hasn’t changed even if your looks have, V. You’re still just as bratty as I remember you being.”

“Hey, that’s what I was known for back in the day,” Vidalia shrugged. “Speaking of which, come on in, you two. Just keep it down. The kids are trying to sleep.”

“Whoa, kids?” Amethyst asked, bewildered as they stepped inside the house. “What the heck happened? I thought you only had one! What, did you and ol’ Farty Marty hook up again?”

“Please. I don’t know where that fool is! And I don’t care either,” Vidalia smiled. “It’s just been me and Yellowtail for a while now.”

“Whaaaat? Yellowtail?” Amethyst gaped.

“How’d you manage to land that catch?” Stan asked with a joking smirk. “Get it?! C-cause Yellowtail’s a-” The conman cut himself off as he noticed neither Amethyst nor Vidalia were laughing. “You know what, never mind.”

“Same old Stan, same old awful jokes,” Vidalia shook her head with a coy grin. “But yeah, things just kinda happened. Next thing you know, I’m living with a fisherman and I have another little troublemaker on my hands. And here he is now.” The artist smirked as Onion ran into the room and jumped into her arms. “You’re supposed to be in bed, mister.” As usual, Onion didn’t respond, even as his mother took the pair of scissors he was wielding away from him.

“Heh, we get it,” Amethyst grinned. “Kids, am I right, Stan?”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! I didn’t know you, of all people, finally decided to settle down, Stan!” Vidalia exclaimed, impressed. “How’d you end up turning into such a silver fox?”

“Please,” Stan scoffed, crossing his arms. “They’re not my kids. I just took in my great niece and nephew for the summer. And honestly, the little scamps are more trouble than they’re worth. Most of the time.”

“Aw, looks like somebody’s finally gone soft in his old age,” Vidalia goaded as she sat Onion down, allowing him to run back upstairs.

“That’s what I was saying!” Amethyst exclaimed. “V, can you believe that this old loser nearly chickened out on going on a Revenge Trip with me tonight?!”

“Yeah, well I didn’t!” the conman protested. “I’m here now, ain’t I?”

“Yeah, only ‘cause I dared you to.”

“Oh, so that’s what you guys are up to, huh?” Vidalia asked with a knowing smirk. “I kinda figured that this wasn’t just a personal visit. So what are you two in the market for tonight? Disguises? Life-sized doubles?”

“Actually… we we’re just gonna need… a painting,” Amethyst said vaguely.

“A painting? Of what?”

“The Tent of Telepathy,” Stan said firmly. “You know, that chump Lil’ Gideon’s place on the other end of town? We’re gonna need a pretty huge backdrop of it, as big and as real-looking as you can make it.”

“Oh yeah?” Vidalia placed her hands on her hips. “You guys are going after Gideon Gleeful? Sounds like kind of a risky move, especially since you two have been out of the game for so long. You really sure you’re up to this?”

“You know we are, girl!” Amethyst said with a daring grin. “We already got everything all laid out, we just gotta go do it! And we need one of your ‘masterpieces’ to help us, V!”

Vidalia let out a long sigh, shaking her head as she looked between the pair. “You two are never gonna learn, are you?” she asked with a smile. “Still, I gotta say, I’ve always respected that about you guys. You never gave up. So, I guess I’ll do your Tent of Telepathy painting. When do you need it by?”

“By the end of the night,” Stan said simply. “If not sooner.”

“What?!” the artist asked, alarmed. “Stan, it’s gonna be a ten foot canvas! I’ll be up all night painting if I-”

“V, come on,” the conman urged with a charming smile. “You’re the best artist in town. If you can’t pull this off, nobody can. Besides, it wouldn’t be the first time you preformed a miracle for us. So… what do ya say?”

Vidalia gave him a skeptical look for a moment, though it petered out as soon as she caught Amethyst’s pleading expression. “Flattery will get you nowhere, old man,” the artist deadpanned with a coy grin. “But just for you guys, I’ll have it ready for you guys to pick up by sun up. If you don’t end up getting arrested first, that is.”

“Alright, V!” Amethyst cheered.

“Thanks, V,” Stan said with actual sincerity. “I knew we could count on you.”

“Who else would you count on?” Vidalia chuckled as she began leading them out. “I’m the only person who won’t rat you two clowns out. Now get on out there and get your revenge. And have some fun for me, will ya? After all, I am gonna be stuck in here all night painting…”

“Will do!” the purple Gem saluted as her and Stan got back in the car. “See ya, V!”

“Later!” Vidalia waved them off as they drove away. “And good luck!” The artist laughed to herself as she shut the door behind her, heading for her workshop to begin the task ahead of her. “Hard to believe that after all these years, the dynamic duo is finally back again… Who could have guessed?”

Stan grumbled indignantly to himself as he took in a long sip of his fifth cup of coffee, knowing that it was the only thing keeping him awake at the moment. Not only had he been up working all night, be he had to contend with the purple Gem still lingering around the shack, banging on doors and windows in a desperate attempt to get in. He had no idea what her reasoning was or why she was being so persistent, but his aggravation with her had grown steadily with each passing hour. And yet, right before he prepared to chase her off with the hose, she had apparently given up altogether and headed home, without so much as a single word. While the conman found it rather strange, he couldn’t deny that he was grateful for losing his unwelcome interloper.

At least until the Murder Hut opened for business the following morning.

“Hey, Mr. Pines!” Greg greeted with a smile as he came in for his shift. Stan merely responded with a sullen groan as he slumped against the counter, clinging onto his coffee mug like a vice. The former rock star frowned as he looked over his boss, unsure of what to make of his apparent exhaustion. “Uh… are you ok?”

“Yeah…” Stan mumbled tiredly. “Just had a long night last night…”

“Oh… Well, uh… then maybe now’s not a good time…”

“Not a good time for what?” the conman asked, sitting up a bit.

“Well… There’s someone who… kinda begged me to come down here with me this morning…” Greg said somewhat sheepishly as he turned to the open door. “Um… You can come on in now!”

Stan bolted upright in his seat upon seeing Amethyst walk in, a remorseful expression on her face as she looked up at him guiltily. “YOU!” the conman shouted furiously. “You little punk! I barely got any sleep around here last night what with you banging on stuff all night long!”

“I know… And I’m sorry, Amscray,” Amethyst pouted sincerely.

“Amscray?” Greg asked, looking to Stan in confusion.

“Ugh, stupid kid,” the conman scowled. “My name’s not Amscray.”

“But you said-”

“I know what I said!” Stan snapped. “Listen, couldn’t you just-” The conman cut himself off with a frustrated sigh before turning to his employee. “Greg, could ya give us a minute here? This won’t take long.”

“Oh, um… sure, Mr. Pines,” Greg nodded, exchanging a somewhat nervous glance as he passed by Amethyst and stepped outside. A long bout of silence lingered between the conman and the purple Gem, before the former finally spoke up, quite exasperated.

“I just don’t get you, kid,” Stan huffed, irritated. “What’s your deal with me anyway? Why couldn’t you just run back up to the statue last night when I first told you to?”

“I dunno…” Amethyst admitted with sincerity. “I guess… I was just so excited to meet you! I don’t know too many humans aside from ol’ Music Man out there, and he’s already super tight with Rose, so… you were like, a totally new face to me! I just thought you were kinda cool.”

Stan cocked an eyebrow at this, unsure of what to think after hearing something like this. After all, it wasn’t like he was called something as positive as ‘cool’ very often. Still, he wasn’t about to be taken in by such simple flattery. “Well… don’t you have Rose and those other two bozos to hang out with? Why do you have to pester me, huh?”

“Rose, Garnet, and Pearl are gone,” Amethyst informed with a frown. “They went on a mission yesterday and… they just… didn’t bother to tell me about it I guess.”

“Oh, well boo-hoo,” Stan deadpanned unsympathetically. “How rough it must be for you, not being able to punch monsters with all of your buddies.”

“It’s not rough,” the purple Gem remarked, pretending she really didn’t care. “After all, this wouldn’t be the first time they left me behind though. They’re always doin’ it. Probably ‘cause they don’t want me around, messing stuff up or whatever.”

The conman’s constant scowl suddenly lightened a bit upon hearing this. As much as he wanted to deny that he had anything in common with any of the Gems, he knew that thinking such a statement didn’t at the very least strike a cord with him would be completely false. “Uh… what do you mean?” he asked hesitantly, already regretting pressing any further, since he really wasn’t fond of the idea of striking much of a conversation with the purple Gem.

“Eh… It’s just… I’m not as smooth or strong as the other Gems…” Amethyst sighed, crossing her arms. “Garnet’s really powerful, Pearl’s super smart, and Rose… Rose can do anything. And me? I’m just the dumb ol’ rock that follows them around.”

“Heh, I know how that feels…” Stan muttered before he could really stop himself.

“You do?” Amethyst asked, surprised as she noticed the conman’s unexpectedly regretful expression.

“Course, I do. When I was a kid, everyone used to always compare me to-” Stan quickly stopped himself as he remembered who he was speaking to before revising his statement. “E-everybody else. And when it came right down to it… Well, let’s just say I was never at the top of anyone’s list.”

“Hey, same here!” the purple Gem exclaimed with a small, depreciating laugh. “That’s sorta why I like shapeshifting so much. Why do I have to be a nobody…” Amethyst smirked as she transformed into Greg, Garnet, and Rose, all in seamless succession. “When I could be anybody?!”

Stan couldn’t help but let out a small, sincere laugh at this, one that he actually didn’t retract on this time. “You know, as freaky as that whole shapeshifting thing is, it’s pretty impressive. You ever thought about goin’ on the road with that, kid?”

“Meh, it’s no big deal,” Amethyst shrugged as she turned back into herself. “But this place you have going on here? It looks awesome!” With an excited grin, the purple Gem looked around the gift shop, taking in all of odd sights on display. “What is all this cool junk anyway?”

“What, you’ve never heard of the Murder Hut before?” Stan asked, slightly offended.

“Murder Hut?” Amethyst stuck her tongue out. “Ugh, that name’s terrible! Who would wanna come to a place with murder in its name aside from crazy people? You should really think about changing it, dude. An old mysterious shack like this deserves to be called something just as mysterious!”

“Mysterious shack, huh…?” Stan mused thoughtfully. “Then how about… the Mystery Shack? What do ya think about that, kid?”

“Oh, man, yeah!” the purple Gem eagerly agreed. “That’s way better!”

“You think so?”

“Yeah I do!”

“Yeah, well I-” Stan cut himself off, his casual grin fading into a scowl once again as he spotted the gemstone on Amethyst’s chest. “Pfft, well, it’s not like I care about what someone like you thinks. I mean, I don’t even know you, much less like ya, kid.”

Amethyst rolled her eyes, her smile unshakable as she looked up to the conman. “You know what I think? I think that’s a lie, old guy. I think you do like me. At least a little.”

“No I don’t!” Stan protested adamantly. “I don’t like any of you Gems! I thought I made that pretty clear last night.”

“Yeah, sure,” the purple Gem laughed, calling his bluff. “Whatever you say, old guy.”

“Will ya stop calling me old guy, kid?” the conman asked impatiently.

“Only if you stop calling me kid,” Amethyst agreed coyly. “But if I can’t call you old guy and I can’t call you Amscray… then what can I call you?”

The conman sighed, part of him wishing he had kicked the purple Gem out of his house the moment she walked in. And the other part of him somehow strangely enjoying the bizarre conversation they were having and wanting it to continue. After all, it had been a long time since he had really opened up to anyone like this. And unfortunately for him, that other, softer part of him won out in the end. “Stan,” he finally answered, smirking just the slightest bit as he watched Amethyst’s eyes light up with delight. “You can call me Stan.”

“Well, we’re here,” Stan announced as he parked the car in the woods just shy of the Tent of Telepathy.

“Yeah! Here comes the revenge!” Amethyst exclaimed, bouncing up and down on her seat. “We’re gonna roast that little punk! I can’t wait to see the look on his face tomorrow when he-”

“Hold it, Amethyst,” the conman cautioned, stopping her before she could jump out of the car. “We can’t just go out there and do this as if it were any old Revenge Trip. If V was right about one thing, it’s that this is a high stakes job.”

“Heh, I get it! Stakes!” the purple Gem laughed. “Cause we’re gonna take the stakes outta the tent! Good one!”

“Heh, yeah sure,” Stan rolled his eyes, grinning in slight amusement. “But I mean it. Gideon may be a chubby little shyster, but he’s a chubby little shyster with a whole lot of clout around here. Which means if we’re not careful, then he could have the entire town turn on us in a heartbeat.”

“Pfft, like I care about what any of those squares think,” Amethyst scoffed. “But fine. If you’re so scared of getting busted, then I’ll cool my jets for you. And cause I don’t wanna get yelled at by Garnet or Pearl if we do end up getting caught.”

“Good,” Stan nodded, grabbing his gloves and hammer from the back seat. “Then let’s hit it.”

Amethyst nodded, holding up her can of spray paint briefly as they both got out of the car. Still, staying out of sight at the edge of the forest, the pair crept towards the tent, making sure to keep an eye out for anyone in the vicinity before they emerged to start their work. As Stan hurried around the tent and pulled each of the pegs holding it down out in quick, quiet succession, Amethyst stood at its rear, taking in the empty “canvas’ before her. She hadn’t really thought ahead too much about her manner of vandalism as much as her method, which was why she was at something of a loss about what to paint on the side of the tent now.

“Well, I got all the pegs,” Stan said as he joined her, holding up a full bag. “All it’ll take is one good gust of wind and this whole place will come toppling down. Plus, these pegs will make some great firewood back at the shack. What’s the holdup back here?”

“I can’t think of anything to write!” Amethyst groaned. “I mean, normally I’m super clever and witty when it comes to coming up with insults, but I’m so hyped on Revenge Trip adrenaline right now. I’m drawing a blank!”

“Geez, do I have to do all the heavy lifting on Revenge Trips even fourteen years later?” Stan asked with an amused grin, taking the spray paint from her. “Gimme that thing. I’ll show you what a good tag looks like.”

The purple Gem watched curiously as the conman graffitied on the side of the tent in deft, confident strokes, before letting out a rosaceous laugh upon seeing what he had written once it was done. “Oh my gosh. That’s hilarious. That stupid kid will never be able to live this one down!”

“Hey, I told you,” Stan shrugged as he tossed the spray paint back to her. “I haven’t lost my touch just yet.”

“Man, I’m sorry for ever doubting you!” Amethyst exclaimed brightly as she followed Stan back towards the car. “Guess you really can still hold your own in a Revenge Trip. So I guess that means you’re not boring. Just old.”

“Yeah, well we’re not done yet,” Stan rolled his eyes casually. “We still gotta-” The conman froze as he accidently bumped into one of the abandoned cars parked near the Tent of Telepathy by mistake. Much to the pair’s misfortune, the car’s security alarm immediately started blaring, which of course, woke up anyone within the immediate vicinity. Stan and Amethyst exchanged a wide-eyed glance as all of the lights in the nearby houses turned on, hoping that it wasn’t already too late for them to make a clean get away.

“Uh, I guess that’s our cue hightail it the heck outta here!” Stan exclaimed, dashing for the car. Of course, Amethyst made it there first, though the conman wasn’t too far behind. Acting as quickly as possible, Stan shoved the key in the ignition, though of course, the car just so happened to stall when he turned it. “Oh come on!”

“What’s wrong?” Amethyst asked, glancing out the front window anxiously. People had already started emerging from their houses as the car alarm continued to ring out obnoxiously through the night.

“Ugh, the stupid thing won’t-” Stan cut himself off as he threw his fist down on the dash of the car, which of course, somehow got it working finally. “There we go!”

“Well, come on! Let’s get the heck outta here before someone sees us!” the purple Gem urged anxiously.

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me twice!” Stan exclaimed, pulling the car into reverse before speeding back onto the road. Amethyst was thrown back in her seat as the conman floored it, practically burning rubber as he drove away from the scene as fast as his car would let him.

After regathering her bearings, the purple Gem sat forward and let out a loud, wild cheer, pumping her fist in the air with apt excitement. “Whoo! Yeah, baby! Petal to the metal!”

“Heh, ya think that’s fast?” Stan asked with a challenging smirk. “Then you ain’t seen what this baby can really do!” His grin widened as he put the car into the next gear, causing it to rocket forward even faster somehow.

Amethyst was practically screaming with exhilaration by this point, especially as she stuck her head out the open car window and let her long hair blow wildly behind her. “Aw, yeah!” she exclaimed with a warm laugh as she sat back down and Stan steadily slowed down. “This is the best! This is totally just how it used to be back in our old Revenge Trip days, and I love it! Doesn’t it just make you feel alive?”

“Heck yeah it does!” the conman boldly agreed with a wide grin. “I don’t even know why I was worried before! Like anybody’s ever gonna catch us this time! Even without Revenge Trips, we’ve still broken in and out of plenty of other tight spots over the years. This’ll be a piece of cake!”

“You’re darn right it will be!” Amethyst exclaimed. “I mean, we’re already one third of the way done! The night’s still young and the rest of this Revenge Trip is in the bag! Ain’t nobody gonna stop this party! And why?”

Stan laughed as he caught the eager, expectant look Amethyst was giving him. And of course, he gave her the answer he was certain she wanted to hear. “Because this party’s going all night!”

With the momentum gained from the first stage of their plan, Stan and Amethyst had more than enough to keep them going as they went on with phase two. Fortunately, the car alarm back at the Tent of Telepathy had hardly tipped anyone off to their presence there, as no one bothered to tail them or look into what had even happened, really. And so they were completely in the clear to ride through town unnoticed as they carried out the next part of their revenge scheme.

Part two was by and large the least risky stage, as it consisted of several brief, succinct stops all over town. They all did have a common theme, however: every stop they made was in front of some kind of advertisement for the Tent of Telepathy. Be it billboards, posters, bus ads, or anything else that had Gideon’s face on it, Amethyst and Stan made sure to stop by them and apply a healthy coat of graffiti. Their designs and messages were different on each one, from giving the child psychic an ugly mustache, to devil horns, to simply writing the word “fraud” on several of them. Whatever they could come up with, it was all fair game.  Fortunately, they only had to deal with one close call while they were working on a billboard in town, but thanks to Amethyst’s shapeshifting, they narrowly evaded being spotted by the passing patrol car.

From there, the rest of their work was relatively easy, especially as they took it to the side and back roads out of town. Along the way, the two of them continued to speed down the empty roads just for fun, laughing and yelling all the while. Whenever the decided to take a break from this, they would instead reminisce about Revenge Trips gone by, laughing over their many reckless escapades and close calls, most of which they could easily look back on as fondly as ever. And for a while, both of them were easily able to forget that they had ever stopped going on Revenge Trips in the first place.

For a moment, as fleeting as it might have been, they both felt just as young and as free as they had been during their very first revenge trip, over twenty years ago.

“Yo, Stan!” Amethyst exclaimed as she entered the gift shop. The purple Gem’s visits to the newly dubbed Mystery Shack had become rather frequent, to the point that she stopped by for a few hours at least once a week, if not more. While the conman did complain at first, he had gotten somewhat used to it after the first month or two. After all, when compared to her fellow Gems, Amethyst wasn’t really the worst company to have around, given her playful personality and her genuinely engaging sense of humor. Stan still wasn’t sure if he would ever refer to her as a “friend”, but at the very least, the two of them had reached an amicable place. For the most part.

“Amethyst,” Stan greeted the purple Gem dully, looking over his newspaper with a cross scowl.

“Whoa, what’s with the long face?” Amethyst asked, hopping up onto the counter as she usually did. “What, was someone a penny short on buying a bobble head?”

“Pfft, I wish,” the conman rolled his eyes as he set his paper down. “Have you seen this? Some chump “tourist destination reviewer” or whatever the heck he calls himself came by here the other day, disguised as a regular old tourist. And then, after I kicked the creep out for asking too many stupid questions, he writes this crummy review about the shack in the town paper!”

“Oh yeah? What’s it say?” the purple Gem asked curiously.

“Nothing but a bunch of complains about how this place is ‘run down’ and my business practices are ‘shady’,” Stan tossed the paper away from him harshly. “What a load of garbage. Weasels like that deserve to be dropped off a very high cliff, if you ask me.”

“Dang, this fool sounds like a real jerk,” Amethyst said, crossing her arms. “What’s his deal anyway? This place is totally cool!”

“Exactly!” Stan asserted. “That’s why I’m gonna put that reviewer in his place tonight with a little good old fashioned revenge.”

“Ooo, revenge?” the purple Gem asked, intrigued. “Sounds neat! Whatcha you gonna do?”

“Eh, nothin’ too fancy. I was just gonna go find his house and then let a bunch of rabid squirrels loose inside of it. Maybe get some pictures of it and send an article of my own to the Gossiper on it.”

Amethyst nearly fell off the counter laughing at this insane, yet admittedly outrageous plan. “Dude, that’s hilarious! You gotta let me come with you and watch! Or better yet, help you round up all those squirrels!”

“Oh, no,” the conman firmly shook his head. “No way. I work alone, kid. Especially on petty heists like this.”

“Aw, come on…” Amethyst pleaded. “I won’t get in the way! I promise! Besides, I need to see some action! Everything’s been so boring lately…”

“What, you mean you haven’t been out tossing that whip of yours at creeps with your buddies recently?” Stan asked, his disdain for the other Gems clear enough in his tone. If there was one thing that both Stan and Amethyst (and Greg, seeing as how he had been roped into all of this too) agreed on, it was that they had every intention of keeping their newfound comradery hidden from the other Gems, particularly Rose. The conman had his own reasons for this, ones that he never really disclosed to the purple Gem, who didn’t really care too much about them in the first place. But for Amethyst, the main reason why she didn’t really care to hear any possible complaints her teammates might aim at either her or Stan for it. After all, she had to put up with enough of those as it was.

“Haven’t been any creeps to toss it at,” the purple Gem shrugged. “And when there are, the others usually just take care of it without me. As usual.”

“Hpmh, what else is new with those three?” Stan said with a scowl. “Still, kid, you can’t come with me tonight. Mostly ‘cause I just don’t think you can keep up with an old pro like me.”

“Pfft, I know I can!” Amethyst exclaimed, hopping to her feet. “I’m a magical Gem warrior! I can handle anything that any ol’ loser might throw at us!”

“That’s a pretty bold claim…” the conman mused with a growing smirk. “You really think you can back it up?”

“Duh!”

“Fine,” Stan shrugged. “Then I’ll give you a shot. But if you start dragging me down for even a second, kid, then I’ll drop you just like I’m gonna drop those squirrels in that reviewer’s house.”

“Deal!” Amethyst exclaimed, taking the conman’s outstretched hand and firmly shaking it. “Aw, man, this Revenge Trip is gonna be great!”

“Revenge Trip?” the conman repeated, aptly confused. “What the heck is a Revenge Trip?”

“It’s what we’re gonna do tonight!” the purple Gem explained brightly. “Ya know, since we’re going on a trip to get some revenge. So it’s a Revenge Trip!”

“Geez, that’s corny,” Stan rolled his eyes. “You may have been right about renaming this place the Mystery Shack, kid, but you might wanna think twice about that whole ‘Revenge Trip’ thing.”

“Eh,” Amethyst shrugged blithely. “You’ll warm up to it eventually.”

It had taken several hours, but soon enough, Stan and Amethyst had succeeded in vandalizing just about every Tent of Telepathy ad they knew of in Gravity Falls. Still, neither of them were really even that tired yet, even if it couldn’t have been any earlier than 3 AM. If there was something either of them knew, it was that exhaustion was never a factor of a Revenge Trip. And if it ever was, then it could easily be fixed with just a few cups of coffee.

With phase two now behind them, Amethyst kicked back in her seat, letting out a contented sigh as Stan drove up the steep hill towards their penultimate destination: the Gleefuls’ merchandise warehouse. By and large, stage three was going to be the most dangerous and most daring part of their scheme, one that could easily end up with them getting caught if they weren’t careful. After all, what they planned to do next was more than just mere graffiti or stealing tent pegs. Stage 3 entailed actual criminal offenses, including breaking and entering, theft, and destruction of property. Nothing the two of them hadn’t done before, but still, things that could carry pretty hefty penalties if they did actually end up getting caught. But still, there was only one rule that Stan and Amethyst had for all of their Revenge Trips: “Instead of just going big, always go bigger.” And this was certainly going to be one of the biggest things they had ever done on a Revenge Trip.

“So you know the plan, right?” Stan asked as they arrived right outside the warehouse.

“Duh,” Amethyst rolled her eyes. “We get in there, get all the stuff, get out, and dump it in the lake. Simple as that.”

“Sure, ‘simple’,” the conman deadpanned, getting out. “It’ll be real simple if we manage to make it outta here without getting busted. Now can you give us an in?” he asked, handing her a crowbar.

“You got it!” the purple Gem gave him a thumbs up, running up to the warehouse before leaping high at one of its windows. After grabbing onto the ledge and perching there, she used her crowbar to pry one of the windows open before hopping down into the warehouse itself. Stan only had to wait for a moment or two before its front doors swung open, revealing a very satisfied Amethyst standing inside.

“What do ya know?” the purple Gem asked as the conman walked past her into the factory. “Looks like I haven’t lost my touch either.”

“How could you when you break into my house at least once a week?”

“Aw, come on. You know you love it.”

“Love is a strong word. How about we say I tolerate it and leave it at that?”

“Pfft, whatever,” Amethyst scoffed as they both stopped to evaluate the large task ahead of them. The warehouse was filled to the brim with Gideon’s self-advertising paraphernalia, piled up in boxes and crates that stacked up to the ceiling. Still, neither Stan nor Amethyst were too terrible daunted by it. After all, they had the rest of the night ahead of them. “So…” the purple Gem began, rolling her eyes as she glanced down at a Lil’ Gideon plushy near her feet. “Where should we start?”

“With anything breakable,” Stan said, clutching his own crowbar. “And then everything else we’ll haul down to the lake.”

“Sounds like a plan to me!” Amethyst readily agreed, more than ready to get to work. And that’s just what they did. Releasing any and all inhibitions, the pair began storming the warehouse, swinging their crowbars at literally anything that could be shattered, bent, or beaten. At one point, the purple Gem even shapeshifted into a wrecking ball and proceeded to plow through as many crates at once as she could. Stan could only stand by and laugh as she did so, taking sheer delight in the unapologetic destruction of his rival’s property. If nothing else, then one thing was certainly clear: the best kind of revenge was certainly being had in this Revenge Trip.

After they had busted just about everything breakable in the entire warehouse, they steadily starting rounding up anything that was left. It was still a fairly sizable load, consisting of clothing, figurines, posters, and more, and not all of it could easily fit inside of Stan’s car. Fortunately, Amethyst came up with a rather clever idea about how they could haul the rest of it down to the lake. Shapeshifting her body thin and wide, the purple Gem scooped the rest of the merchandise into her arms and formed herself into something of a large “sack” to hold it all in. With Stan’s assistance, she managed to perch herself on top of the car, holding tightly onto the roof as she held all of the stolen goods under her.

“K-k!” Amethyst exclaimed down to the conman, clearly straining. “I… I think I’m ready!”

“Are you sure?” Stan asked with apt concern. “Cause you look like you’re pushing yourself pretty hard up there.”

“A-aw…” the purple Gem laughed roughly. “Y-you really do care about me, S-Stan!”

“Yeah, yeah,” the conman said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Let’s just get going already. The sooner we finish, the sooner I can finally go home and get in bed. Coffee only does so much, you know.”

“Then c-come on!” Amethyst urged as Stan got in the car. “L-let’s finish this!”

The conman complied as he started driving off, going slow at first to make sure Amethyst had a steady hold on the roof before resorting to the normal speed. They both knew they had to exercise a bit more caution now, seeing as how the purple Gem large, bag-like form on the roof would certainly be a dead give-away that they were up to something suspicious. Still, time was on their side, since nobody was out so very late at night. Which meant that they were able to ride all the way to the lake without passing so much as a single soul. Indeed, it certainly seemed that everything was going off without a hitch.

So far.

Amethyst let out an exhausted sigh, finally lifting her straining form as Stan pulled up on the shore of the beach. All of the stolen merchandise fell off of the roof right along with the Gem, several boxes already dropping into the shallows of the lake already.

“You ok?” Stan asked as he stood over Amethyst, who simply lay flat on her back in the sand as she recovered. “Or are you gonna need a minute?”

The purple Gem responded with a feeble thumbs-up. “I-I’m… good...” she assured breathlessly.

“Good, because we don’t have a lot of time to waste,” the conman said. “We gotta shove all this junk into the lake before sun-up, or else we’ll-”

“Or else what, Stanford?”

Stan and Amethyst gasped in startled unison as a pair of glaring headlights suddenly beamed down on them. And of course, standing in the middle of the spotlights, was none other than the very target of their Revenge Trip: Gideon himself.

“Gideon?!” the pair exclaimed in apt shock, glancing to each other first and then to the child psychic, who stood before them with a very smug smirk.

“Well, good evenin’ both of ya!” Gideon exclaimed with transparently faux friendliness. “Or perhaps I should be saying good mornin’ since its, oh, about 4 in the morning! Now that begs the question… what are ya’ll doin’ out here this early with such a fine array of merchandise from my factory, hm?”

“Oh, this?” Stan asked with a caustic scowl. “We were just moving it all for you. Yeah, we figured that a bunch of useless tacky junk like this belongs more at the bottom of the lake than it does all nice and cozy in that warehouse of yours.”

“Oh, well I’m much obliged, Stanford, much obliged,” Gideon nodded, still playing his amicable card for all it was worth. “’Course, you both realize that I can’t just let something like this lie. Especially since all of my signs all around town were also shamelessly vandalized tonight. Ya’ll wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you?”

“Ugh, just shut up, you little twerp,” Amethyst groaned in exasperation as she stood up. “You already caught us red-handed, you don’t have to be an annoying jerk about it.”

“Very well then, I suppose your right,” the child psychic shrugged. “Guess there really is no need in bein’ pleasant if you ain’t gonna be. I’ll just settle for dialing up the police and letting them handle this,” Gideon grinned darkly as he pulled out his phone. “I’m sure the town prison will just love to welcome two new inmates in one night.”

“Ok then, go ahead and call them,” Stan challenged, unconcerned. Amethyst shot him a concerned look at this, but he was quick to reassure her with a subtle wink. “And while you’re at it, go ahead and tell them how you trespassed onto my property earlier and broke my fence. Or about how you vandalized the Gem’s temple and painted the whole thing pink. I’m sure they’d love to hear about that.”

“Ohhhh!” Amethyst exclaimed with a triumphant laugh. “You can’t smooth-talk your way outta all that, Gideon! We know you did all that stuff!”

“Maybe so,” Gideon acknowledged. “But it’s my word against ya’lls. And really, who are they gonna believe? Poor lil’ ol’ me? Or the town crook and a Gem with a known record of causin’ mischief?”

Stan and Amethyst both sucked in anxious breaths upon hearing this, knowing that as much as they hated to admit it, Gideon was right. He had the town practically wrapped around his little finger; it would take a miracle for them to convince anyone that they were in the right here, especially since all of the evidence of their misdeeds stood right beside them. “So are we making a break for it?” Amethyst muttered to Stan.

“Do you even have to ask?” the conman replied in a quick whisper. “Getaway time!” he shouted, throwing one of the smoke bombs he always kept on hand down. While the child psychic was blinded by the blast, Stan and Amethyst hurriedly jumped into the car and sped off down the shoreline, leaving their haul of merchandise behind completely in favor of escaping.

“Wha—hey!” Gideon shouted, enraged as he watched his foes get away. “Get back here, you—augh!” The child psychic ran to the car behind him, hopping into the passenger’s seat behind his father. “After them, Daddy!” he ordered harshly as he began dialing up the police. “Don’t you dare let them get away!”

Meanwhile, the conman was flooring it as he swerved back onto the road, while Amethyst took a nervous glance out the back window. “Uh, he’s following us!”

“Of course he is, the little troll!” Stan growled. “Wouldn’t have expected anything else from him. That’s why we gotta loose him!”

“Yeah! Now you’re talking!” the purple Gem exclaimed, her former pep returning. “Oh, wait! I got an idea!” Amethyst quickly turned around in her seat, reaching for the mound of plushies that they had shoved in the back and grabbing several of them. Opening her window wide, the purple Gem threw them hard at Bud’s car, watching with a satisfied grin as he had to swerve out of the way to miss one.

“Nice one!” Stan exclaimed, exchanging a high five with her. “Now we just gotta-” The conman froze the moment he started hearing police sirens from behind. Amethyst gasped as she looked out the back to see a patrol car had joined the chase, and now rode alongside Gideon and his father in trailing them.

“Aw, come on!” the purple Gem groaned. “How’d they get here so fast?! I swear, it’s like that kid can get anyone to do anything for him!”

“It doesn’t matter!” the conman exclaimed, speeding on the narrow forest road. “Cause we’re about to shake both of them as soon as I find the dirt path up ahead.”

“That old thing? You’ll never be able to find it as dark as it is out here!” Amethyst protested. “Let me drive, I have a much better idea!”

“What?! You really think I’m gonna let you drive my car?!” Stan scoffed in disbelief. “Now you’ve really lost it!”

“Come on, Stan, just trust me on this!” Amethyst pleaded, reaching for the wheel. “I have a plan! You know me! I always have a plan!”

“Yeah, well if you always have a plan, then why didn’t you plan on this happening, huh?!” Stan retorted crossly, pulling the wheel away from her. The car weaved back and forth wildly on the road as they grappled for it, but even still, both Gideon and the cops kept tight on their tail.

“I could have planned for it!” the purple Gem argued, pushing on the wheel hard.

“Then why didn’t you?!”

“Because… because I… Look out!” Amethyst let out a frightened shout as the car rounded the next turn hard. Fortunately, they managed to lose Gideon and the police in this turn, but unfortunately, neither of them were able to stop the car from veering out of control and off of the road altogether. The pair let out a unified frightened scream as the car plowed into the forest at an alarming speed, the breaks proving useless thanks to their drastic descent down the hill. They only narrowly managed to avoid hitting one of the many trees in their path thanks to Stan keeping his wits about him enough to swerve through them, though nearly every one they passed was a drastically close call. After what felt like ages of bouncing roughly through the woods, the car finally at last came to a gradual stop in the middle of a wide clearing.

As the car finally went still and the engine mercifully cut off, both Stan and Amethyst let loose the terrified breaths they had been holding all throughout their trip down the hill. However, as the conman leaned back in his seat to try and catch his lost breath, the purple Gem instead let out a raucous, excited cheer over their survival.

“Whoo! We lived! And it was awesome!” she exclaimed, stars in her eyes. “Man, I wish I could have seen the looks on our faces as we were rolling down that hill! What a wild ride! Huh, Stan?” Amethyst grinned widely as she glanced over at the conman, who was instead simply glaring down at his lap in utter disbelief. “Uh… Stan?”

“Amethyst, we nearly just died,” Stan said, his tone harsh and cold.

“Well, yeah, almost, I guess,” Amethyst shrugged. “But he, we didn’t! Cause like we said, this party’s going all night! And nothing’s gonna stop us from-”

“Amethyst!” the conman practically shouted, clearly in no mood for such merriment. “I’m serious!”

“Pfft, since when?” the purple Gem scoffed, crossing her arms as she glared away from him. “Oh yeah, that’s right. Since you got old and boring. Should have known you’d wimp out on me in the end. Just like last time.”

“And I should have known that everything would turn south, just like last time,” Stan scowled just as bitterly. “I don’t even know why I agreed to come along on this disaster. I knew I should have just gone with my gut and stayed home. At least then I wouldn’t be on the lamb again.”

“Yeah, cause anything’s better than going on another Revenge Trip with me, right?” Amethyst asked sourly. “Oh, and let me guess. You’re probably wishing that you never let me start hanging around you all those years ago either, huh? I’m sure that would have saved you a ton of headaches and annoyance! Well sorry that I thought you were cool for some reason back then. Because now, it’s pretty obvious that I was totally wrong!”

“Whatever,” the conman remarked coldly. “You really think I care what you think about me? Or about what anyone thinks of me? Well, I don’t! Never have! And you know why? Because unlike you, I’m totally fine on my own! I don’t need anybody to pick me up when I’m down and tell me I’m gonna be ok, because that’s not how the real world works! I don’t need to go out and act up like this just to make myself feel better! The only reason I ever went along and did any that was because of you!”

“Oh yeah? W-well, who said I ever needed you to make me feel better?!” Amethyst shouted, her temper getting the better of her. “I was just fine before I ever met you! Back then I had Rose, and she’d always tell me that I was special, that I was important, no matter what!”

“Oh wow, real inspiring,” Stan deadpanned. “I’m sure she really meant it too. Just like how she said she was gonna stick around you guys forever, huh? And look at how that ended up turning out.”

Amethyst suddenly threw her fist down hard on the dashboard upon hearing this. “Don’t you ever talk about Rose like that!” she practically screamed, tears welling up in her eyes. “You think it’s not hard enough that she’s gone?! I don’t need to be reminded of it, especially not by you! You couldn’t possibly know how hard it is to just lose someone like that!”

“Oh, really?!” Stan asked, completely appalled. “Because I know what it’s like to lose someone important too. I knew about that way before you ever did! In fact, I-” The conman quickly cut himself off before he said too much, but he still remained quite bitter, even if he calmed down somewhat and went off on an entirely different tangent. “See, this right here is why we stopped doing Revenge Trips…”

“What are you talking about?” Amethyst asked, letting out a frustrated huff. “We stopped because you got lame on me, just like everyone else…”

“No. We stopped because this happened last time too,” Stan said with palpable regret. “It nearly ended up ruining…” The conman sighed, knowing this would be one of the rare occasions he was actually going to admit to this, though he did so all the same. “Our friendship. Remember?”

The purple Gem stilled at this, her scowl fading as she looked to the conman somewhat gently. “Of course, I do,” she said, her tone strangely fragile and morose as she glanced down briefly. “How could I forget one of the worst nights of my life?”

Stan and Amethyst’s initial “Revenge Trip” had been a rousing success. In almost no time at all, they had filled the tourist reviewer’s home with rabid squirrels and had laughed together over it all the while. And of course, since their first Revenge Trip had gone so well, it didn’t take long for them to find reasonable cause to go on a second one. Then a third one. And a forth one.

Sure enough, Revenge Trips very quickly became a norm for the pair, at least a weekly affair that they always looked forward to. Under the cover of night, they would set off, with a different target in mind each time, always ready to right any perceived wrongs against them in the best of ways. Their methods were creative, their tactics, clever, and their zeal, undaunted. Rare was the occasion where they ever got caught, and if they did, then either Stan would talk their way out or Amethyst would force their way out. They had gained both allies and enemies along the way, but what they gained the most of by far were memories. Through their misadventures and scheming, Stan and Amethyst had gone from begrudging acquaintances to true friends, friends forged by nights of freedom, danger, and most of all, vengeance. For eight straight years, the dynamic duo felt like they were on top of the world, unstoppable in their many quests for revenge and excitement.

Until, of course, it all came to a grinding halt.

It was a simple job, one they had thought about and planned out as much as they could. A supplier up the road had failed to deliver a shipment of merchandise that Stan had already paid for, and they adamantly refused to give him a refund for it. So of course, the only way the conman could see to rectify the situation was contracting Amethyst for another one of their infamous Revenge Trips. The ride up to the factory had been a rather long and uneventful one, but once they arrived, they were more than ready to carry out their well-thought out plans. Making use of Stan’s wide variety of tools and Amethyst’s clever use of shapeshifting, the pair managed to sneak their way into the factory, where they planned on stealing several boxes of goods in order to make up for what the conman hadn’t received.

And yet, through years of successful Revenge Trips, Stan and Amethyst had gotten admittedly cocky in their scheming. Since nobody had ever really caught and held them for too long, they started to hold onto the belief that they were invincible, that no one could nab them because they were far too smart and far too fast to be pinned down by anyone. A belief that, of course, was their downfall in the end.

Usually, the places they raided on their Revenge Trips were abandoned by night, or far enough out of the way that they wouldn’t have to worry about being seen. However, what neither of them had anticipated was that the target of their heist was actually surprisingly upscale. While breaking in had been easy, evading detection was a whole other issue. The moment they dropped down into the factory, a siren alarm started blaring, prompting the security guards on duty to give chase. Seeing that their mission was immediately futile, Stan and Amethyst already started making a break for it. When they were inevitably apprehended at the door, they both tried to fight their way out of the officers’ gasp, with punches, kicks, and even a few whip lashes. But in the end, they were indeed outnumbered and outgunned, and both of them were ultimately arrested on the spot.

Since their Revenge Trip had taken them out of Gravity Falls, the pair found themselves in a precinct far harsher and more strict than what they were used to. What would have been regarded with a mere slap on the wrist in Gravity Falls was considered a serious offense in this new area. Breaking and entering, resisting arrest, and attempted theft were all on the bill for possible charges they were both facing. Still, there was little they could do to argue their case as they were locked in one of the police station’s small cells, awaiting further sentencing.

“I can’t believe we got caught,” Stan grumbled to himself, reclining against the stone wall behind him. “All these years of Revenge Trips and we’ve never been busted like this before! Guess that’s why got caught in the first place: we got sloppy.”

“Yeah, we did, but you know what’s not gonna be sloppy?” Amethyst asked with a sly smirk. “Bustin’ outta here.”

“What? You can’t be serious,” the conman scoffed. “Amethyst, we aren’t in Gravity Falls anymore. These cops aren’t as dumb or easy to fool as the ones back home. If they were, then I would have already talked us out of this cell and we’d be off the hook.”

“Oh, so what?” Amethyst asked, standing with an impatient scowl. “You’re just gonna sit here and serve five to ten just because we made one dumb mistake?”

“No, but I’m just saying. We need to see how this is gonna turn out before rushing into anything else. Tonight’s already turning out to be enough of a mess as it is, we don’t need to make it any worse.”

The purple Gem shot the conman a cold glare upon hearing this, but even so, she refused to sit down again. “Since when did you start wimping out on me, Stan? You’re always telling me about all of the wild and crazy things you used to do back in the day, so what gives?”

“‘What gives’ is that this isn’t worth it!” Stan exclaimed adamantly. “It’s all fun and games until something like this happens. And I’ve been in enough scrapes of my own to know that when things go downhill as bad as this, that’s when it’s time to bail out.”

“Wha—Yeah, b-but… that’s what makes it all so fun!” Amethyst protested. “It wouldn’t be worth it if it was easy! The risk is what makes a Revenge Trip a Revenge Trip! Duh!”

“See, that’s always been your problem, Amethyst!” the conman scolded. “You always gotta go bigger than you need to and it always ends up getting both of us in trouble! And… and I’m done.”

“D-done with that?”

“With this! With Revenge Trips, with getting arrested, with-”

“With me?!” Amethyst asked challengingly, her hands curled into tight fists.

“Maybe!” Stan shouted before he could really stop himself. He immediately regretted it though, especially as the purple Gem took in a sharp, very hurt gasp upon hearing this. Her bottom lip quivered as her eyes filled up with incoming tears that she refused to let loose as she simply glared piercingly at the conman, her expression saying everything that her words couldn’t. “A-Amethyst,” Stan quickly tried to redact his statement, his eyes wide as he realized he had definitely crossed the line in his frustration. “I… I don’t… I didn’t mean-”

“Amethyst!” The pair was abruptly startled out of the moment as a familiar pair marched up to their cell. Stan let out a disgruntled sigh upon seeing Garnet and Pearl, though Amethyst’s reaction was by far more worried.

“Oh no…” she muttered, knowing that the situation had just gone from bad to worse. For the past eight years, she had managed to keep her Revenge Trip escapades with Stan a secret from her fellow Gems, knowing that they would never approve of them. After all, she had learned over the course of the past eight years and whenever Rose and Stan so much as crossed paths, they would always buck heads in some way or another. And of course, Garnet and Pearl would always side with their leader, no matter what. But now, there would indeed be no denying it or trying to sneak off as Amethyst usually did. They had both been caught red handed.

“Oh, it looks like you were right after all, Garnet!” Pearl exclaimed, standing outside the cell with the taller Gem and glaring at the pair inside. “I didn’t want to believe that Amethyst would engage in something so deplorable, especially with a miscreant like you, Stan, but here we all are! Care to explain?”

“Sheesh,” Stan rolled his eyes. “As if getting arrested wasn’t bad enough, now we gotta sit here and listen to you lecture to us, Pearl? Might as well just send me off to death row and get it over with instead.”

Pearl was so livid upon hearing this that she was practically shaking with visible rage. “Did you hear what he just said to me?!” she whispered to Garnet harshly. “What a no-good, callous, irresectable, lying, cheating-”

“Pearl,” Garnet quieted her teammate evenly. “Calm down.”

“Ugh, what are you guys even doing here?” Amethyst asked, dismayed. “And how’d you find out about this anyway? We’ve been doing this for eight years, and you guys are only now busting our chops for it?”

“Eight years?!” the white Gem gasped, shocked. “We just started thinking that your little nighttime ‘solo missions’ were not what they seemed just the other week! How have you two been keeping this insane ruse up for eight whole years?!”

“Uh, maybe it’s because we’re way smarter than you, stretch,” Stan deadpanned. “Even thought about that one?”

“Clearly you weren’t smart enough to not get arrested,” Garnet remarked just as sarcastically.

“So what? Are you guys gonna break us outta here or not?” the purple Gem asked with an exasperated sigh.

“Of course we’re not!” Pearl exclaimed. “As far as I’m concerned, you both deserve to learn the consequences of your horrible actions! Isn’t that right, Rose?” The white Gem paused upon realizing her leader was nowhere to be found. “Rose?”

“Oh, sorry, Pearl!” the pink Gem exclaimed as she stepped into the cell block. Her stomach was starting to become even rounder by the day thanks to her pregnancy, which was still in its relatively early stages. Still, a look of palpable exhaustion was written on her face and her usually mirthful expression was anything but, especially as she took in the sight of the pair in the cell before her. “I was just making sure none of those officers you knocked out earlier were seriously hurt and—Oh…” Rose frowned, giving the conman a critical gaze as she regarded him. “Stan.”

“Rose,” Stan greeted just as dryly, not even bothering to hide his distaste for the pink Gem.

“Rose…” Amethyst muttered much more hesitantly, looking down to the ground guiltily.

“Amethyst…” Rose began, her tone soft yet firm as she looked down to the youngest member of her team. “What’s all this about? What were you doing to end up here and with… him?”

“Rose, these two have been up to no good for nearly eight years now, right under our noses!” Pearl quickly informed her leader, wrapping her arms around her arm. “Can you believe it?! Eight whole years! And we never noticed until now! I can’t imagine how they managed to-”

“It doesn’t matter now,” the pink Gem cut her off, surprising everyone. “Pearl, let me handle this.”

The white Gem sucked in a sharp breath, but nodded in relent, backing away to let Rose step closer to the cell. While Gems didn’t need sleep, there were clear bags under the pink Gem’s eyes, ones that seemed all the more present as she looked between the pair before her with an uncharacteristically cold expression. “Amethyst?”

“Y-yeah…?” the purple Gem frowned up at her leader, already feeling quite small under her imposing gaze.

“There’s no excuse for this kind of behavior,” Rose said, her admonishing tone still somehow strangely gentle. “You’re a Crystal Gem. You need to start acting like one. When I’m… gone, all that will be left is you, Garnet, and Pearl. And I need to be able to depend on you to protect humanity in my place. But I can’t do that if you’re going to be acting like… this. Do you understand?”

Amethyst nodded meekly, wrapping her arms around herself tightly as she fought back tears. While Rose’s words were hardly mean or hurtful, the purple Gem still hated being admonished by her leader at all. The very idea she had disappointed the pink Gem was enough to fill Amethyst with more shame than she could really handle, which was why she said nothing, but merely hung her head as Rose continued.

“And as for you, Stan,” the pink Gem’s tone turned harsher as she addressed the conman. “I just don’t understand. I thought we made it very clear where we stood with each other years ago. You said so yourself: you wanted nothing to do with any of us, which was perfectly fine. But then, all of the sudden, you start hanging around with Amethyst completely out of nowhere. It makes no sense. What could you possibly have to gain from that?”

“Maybe I didn’t wanna ‘gain’ anything from it, huh?” Stan retorted, scowling. “Maybe we just did it for the heck of it. And it’s not like you really gripe at me about any of this, seeing as how you three constantly leave Amethyst out of everything.”

“Wha—what are you talking about?” Rose asked, caught off guard by this. “We… we don’t… Amethyst… is… is that how you’ve been feeling?”

The purple Gem still didn’t meet her leader’s eyes as she slowly nodded once more. “Yeah…  a little…”

“I… I’m so sorry…” Rose said with genuine remorse. “I had no idea… But still. That’s no excuse for this. Stan, you had no right to inspire Amethyst to act so… so…”

“Morally irreprehensible?” Pearl suggested. “Deviously? Illegally?”

“Thank you, Pearl, that’s enough,” the pink Gem said with slight impatience.

“Oh, sure,” Stan remarked with biting sarcasm. “Go ahead, blame me for all of this. You already blame me for everything else, so why not this too?”

“Well maybe I would have to blame you if you had just let things be as we had agreed and left all of us alone!” Rose exclaimed, growing steadily angrier.

“Well maybe I would have left you alone if you had kept your nose out of things like you should have from the beginning!” Stan shouted, standing.

“Maybe I would have stayed out of things if you hadn’t shown up here in the first place and started undoing everything we had worked hard to-”

“Stop it!” Amethyst suddenly shouted, rushing to stand between the two to break the intense argument up. “Just stop it! I don’t even know why you guys are arguing anyway when this is all my fault anyway!”

“What?” Rose asked as both Pearl and Garnet looked to each other confused.

“Amethyst, what-” Stan started to ask, but the purple Gem was interrupt him.

“You heard me,” Amethyst said, irresolute. “This is all my fault. Not Stan’s. I was the one who went down to his house eight years ago and… I dunno, we just sorta became friends. In fact… I was the one who came up the whole Revenge Trip thing in the first place.”

“But-” Stan tried to cut her off, confused, but the purple Gem continued before he could say anything to incriminate himself.

“I’m the reason why we got in trouble and wound up in here,” the purple Gem affirmed. “So… if you’re gonna yell at anyone, yell at me. But… don’t blame Stan for this, please. I know you don’t like him, Rose, but… I do. We’re friends. He’s like… the only person who’s there for me when you guys aren’t. I feel… I feel like I can really be myself around him… Doesn’t that mean anything?”

Rose was silent for quite a long time as she looked down to her younger teammate, conflict written all over her tired expression, especially as she briefly glanced at Stan. And yet, after what seemed like ages of tentative silence, she finally released a long, pensive sigh. “Oh, Amethyst…” she began, glancing away guiltily. “I… We… We’ll talk about this when we get back to the temple… For now, let’s… let’s just get you out of there.”

Stan and Amethyst both looked to each other in confusion over Rose’s seeming acceptance over the purple Gem’s apparent outburst. Still, neither of them complained too much as Garnet stepped forward and summoned her gauntlets, easily bending the cell bars to the point that there was a wide enough opening for both of them to step through. Not too many other words were sparred between Stan and the Gems, save for a terse, dry thank you from the conman, one that Rose simply returned with a small, emotionless nod. And then, without any further signs of civility, they all parted ways the moment they all emerged from the police station.

And yet, as Stan headed back for his car, he happened to glance over his shoulder one last time to see Amethyst looking back at him too as she glumly followed behind her fellow Gems. While the conman wasn’t much for shows of gratitude, he did mouth her a soft ‘thank you’ before she got too far away. Amethyst’s only response was a small, yet bittersweet smile, one that quickly faded as she turned away from him.

And just like that, the final Revenge Trip was over.

“You wanna know what Rose said to me when we got back to the temple that night?” Amethyst asked, her voice still subdued as she hugged her legs tightly to her chest.

“Amethyst, I already-” Stan started, but the purple Gem quickly cut him off.

“Besides all that that. She told me she was disappointed in me. And… while that hurt, a lot, in a way it was sorta… ok. Because I took the brunt of everything for you and… I was really glad I did…”

The conman was silent for a moment upon hearing this, not really sure of what to make of something so touching. Even though that had been years ago, he suddenly felt compelled to finally give her the proper thanks she deserved for defending him that night, for sticking up for him even in front of the other Gems. But instead of any of that, a mere question escaped him instead. “So… are you still glad you did?”

Amethyst paused and seemed to muse over this for a moment or two. However, just as she opened her mouth to give him an answer, a sudden light flooded into the car from the outside. The pair shielded their eyes from it, all while exchanging a frightened glance because certainly Gideon and the cops must have found them by now. But as the light dimmed a bit, they were both equally shocked and dismayed to see who had really found them.

“Amethyst!” Pearl shouted hotly as she stood before the car, her hands on her hips. “Get out of that car this instant! You too, Stan!”

“Aw, geez…” the purple Gem groaned, complying as she opened her door and slipped out.

“Yeesh, history really does repeat itself, doesn’t it?” Stan deadpanned in a futile attempt to lighten the mood. Once they were both out of the car, the pair was able to see that Pearl was not alone. Garnet had accompanied her, of course, but so had Steven, Dipper, and Mabel, all of whom were clad in their pajamas and all of whom looked very tired and confused over having been roused out of bed so late.

“Amethyst? Mr. Pines?” Steven asked with a frown. “What are you guys doing out here in the middle of the woods this late?”

“Getting busted, apparently,” the purple Gem scowled, kicking a nearby rock. “Also what gives?” she asked the twins harshly. “I thought you guys agreed to not spill any of this to Pearl or Garnet. Not cool, dudes.”

“Just for the record, we didn’t tell them anything about what you guys were up to,” Dipper said defensively. “Mostly because we didn’t even know what you guys were up to ourselves.”

“Yeah, they just came by and got us out of bed so we could come down here and find you guys,” Mabel explained, letting out a yawn. “So what were you guys doing anyway? Racing through the forest against squirrels or something? Because that sounds like a lot of fun!”

“I can tell you right now what they were doing out here,” Pearl said, looking to Stan and Amethyst with a caustic glare. “Getting themselves in all sorts of trouble, that’s what.”

“Hey, we only got in trouble because we got caught,” Stan retorted crossly. “Besides, how’d you even find us all the way out here in the middle of nowhere?”

“Just like how we found you the last time,” Garnet said stoically. “Future vision.”

“Ugh, of course,” Amethyst sighed in exasperation. “That always comes in to bite us in the butt somehow.”

“Honestly, Amethyst, I can’t believe you would go out and do another one of these heinous… ‘Revenge Trips’ again!” Pearl scolded. “Didn’t you both learn your lesson last time when you got arrested for one of these nights of reckless abandon?”

“Whoa, you guys got arrested together before?” Steven asked curiously.

“Why don’t you guys ever tell us about all this cool stuff you used to do?!” Mabel asked, just as intrigued.

“Because it doesn’t matter, kid,” Stan remarked coldly. “That was years ago. Which means you two can’t hold it against us anymore,” he said to Garnet and Pearl.

“I think we have every right to, seeing as how both of you are still acting just as childish now as you were back then!” Pearl exclaimed. “Why, just think of the terrible example you both are setting for the kids!”

“Uh, to be fair, they really didn’t set an example that any of us would really follow,” Dipper pointed out. “What, with the whole driving a car into the forest thing.”

“Yeah, see?” Stan shrugged. “If the kids aren’t all torn up about it, then why should you be? It’s not even a big deal. You guys don’t have to get all bent out of shape about it.”

“It is a big deal,” Garnet said firmly. “What you two did tonight was irresponsible and reckless. You know that. And both of you should be ashamed for it.”

“I completely agree, Garnet,” Pearl affirmed pointedly. “Amethyst, didn’t you listen to a word that Rose told you that night years ago?! Oh, just think of what she would say if she were here now. She’d be mortified by your irresponsible, heedless, dangerous, selfish-”

“Hold it!” Stan interrupted, having heard quite enough, especially as he noticed Amethyst’s downcast expression. “Now you two can stand here and scream at me all you want for what happened tonight, but I’m not about to let you let Amethyst take the fall for any of it.”

“Uh, Stan?” Amethyst asked, suddenly confused. The conman largely ignored her however, as Pearl spoke up.

“Oh, and why is that?”

“Because… because this was my idea!” Stan proclaimed firmly, not even bothering to look over at Amethyst as she looked up at him in completely shock. “Yeah, that’s right,” the conman continued just as brazenly as everyone looked to him skeptically. “The whole shebang was my idea. Guess I was just getting a little stir crazy and needed some action. So I roped Amethyst into going on a classic Revenge Trip with me. And you can’t really fault her for saying yes, especially since you two are always fussing at her all the time anyway.”

“Whoa… Grunkle Stan, is all that true?” Mabel asked as both her and Dipper looked to him, concerned.

Stan did hesitate for a moment upon seeing the somewhat critical glances both his nibblings were giving him. He wasn’t too fond of the idea of painting himself in such a negative light in front of them, but still, Amethyst had done the very same thing before her fellow Gems for him years ago. It was only fair that he return the favor now. “You’re darn right it is,” he said with resolve. “Isn’t that right, Amethyst?”

The purple Gem looked to the conman in complete disbelief, knowing he had just lied to spare her from the criticism of her teammates. And while she wanted to turn right around and tell the truth to spare him from it all, she didn’t have the heart to undermine the selfless act he had just done for her. Which was why she simply mumbled her response, suppressing a smile of gratitude as she did so. “Yeah… That’s right.”

“Well, we should have figured as much,” Pearl scoffed coldly, glaring at Stan. “Nothing ever changes with you, does it, Stan? You’re still just as irresponsible now as you’ve always been. In fact, I have half a mind to-”

“Pearl,” Garnet suddenly cut the white Gem off, stepping past her as she approached Stan. The conman crossed his arms as he scowled up at her, but the Gem leader’s expression was surprisingly soft, as hidden as it was. “Stan,” she began, her tone firm yet calm. “Thank you for telling us the truth. This doesn’t make what either of you did tonight right, but… it does prove a lot that you’re willing to put yourself out there for Amethyst. Which… to be honest… isn’t something even we can say we do for her that often.”

“Well then, maybe you should start,” Stan said before Amethyst could cut in. “Cause you know, she really ain’t half bad.”

“Heh,” the purple Gem chuckled, clearly touched by this. Still, she made sure to hide it under her usual playfulness as she elbowed the conman in the knee. “Same goes for you, ‘old man’.”

The kids all exchanged warm smiles at this sweet exchange, one that Garnet shared and eventually even Pearl cracked a small smile over, her earlier frustration slowly ebbing away. However, the tender moment was cut far too short as the group overheard the heavy sounds of approaching footsteps and nearby voices.

“I saw a light over this way!” Gideon’s tell-tale accent called out. “C’mon!”

“Aw, man! It’s Gideon!” Amethyst whispered, worriedly. “We forgot all about that little loser!”

“Wait, you two were trying to get revenge on Gideon?” Dipper asked. “Well, I guess that makes sense considering what he did to Compy’s enclosure earlier…”

“Aw, you guys totally should have asked us to come with you then!” Mabel exclaimed with a smirk. “We would have loved to help you get even with Gideon!”

“Ugh, and he’s got the fuzz with him too?” Stan scowled, hearing other voices follow after the child psychic’s. “Whelp, that’s it! We’re pretty much done for this time! Might as well just surrender now, because how in the world would we ever get outta this one?”

“Like this,” Garnet said with resolve. “Stan, Amethyst, take the kids and hide. We’ll handle this.”

“Wha—we will?” Pearl asked as the others ran off to hide in the cover of the woods. She quickly redacted her hesitance, however, upon catching the caustic look the Gem leader gave her. “Oh! I mean, o-of course we will! Right…”

“Aha!” Gideon exclaimed as him and Blubbs and Durland burst into the clearing. “There they—are?”

“Evening, officers,” Garnet said calmly, leaning casually against Stan’s car as her and Pearl attempted to play it cool. “Gideon.”

“Wha—You two?!” the child psychic exclaimed, dumbfounded. “What are ya’ll doing here? Where are Stanford and Amethyst?! I demand you bring them out here so they can pay recompense for their crimes against me immediately!”

“Oh, we would, if they were still here, of course,” Pearl said with faux innocence. “And if they were guilty of any crimes at all. But, as it stands, you were the one who engaged them in a high speed car chase, Gideon and apparently from the looks of it… ran them off the road, endangering both of their lives and nearly causing a case of vehicular manslaughter…”

“What?! I did no such thing!” Gideon protested hotly. “Officers, they’re lyin’ to ya both right through their teeth! Can’t you see through their wicked little Gem trickery?”

“Hm…” Blubbs mused, glancing between the two Gems. “Well, if our two ‘culprits’ aren’t here, then where are they?”

“They went home,” Garnet replied simply.

“That’s right,” Pearl added with a nod. “The poor things were both so traumatized after the whole experience that they came and asked the two of us to retrieve Stan’s car while they recovered. And of course, how could ever deny a request from two… t-two… upstanding members of the community! Heh, right…”

“You really think we’re buying any of that trash?” Gideon asked with a scoff, turning to the officers once more. “I saw the two of them trying to dump all of my merchandise into the lake! Check the car! I’m sure ya’ll will find more than enough evidence.”

“You heard him,” Blubbs said to the pair of Gems as him and Durland stepped forwards. “Step aside, ladies.”

“O-oh… Of course!” Pearl exclaimed with apt nervousness. Fortunately though, Garnet had a plan as always.

“Wait! Look at that!” the Gem leader exclaimed, pointing in the opposite direction. Of course, the cops, as well as Gideon, were all gullible enough to fall for the ploy, allowing Garnet just enough time to grab all of the remaining merchandise out of the back of Stan’s car. While the others were still distracted, Garnet easily tossed her large haul across the forest right before they all turned around. “Alright, go ahead and check.”

The officers did so, shining their flashlight in the backseat only to find it was completely empty. “Well, golly, nothing’s in there!” Durland exclaimed.

“W-what?!” Gideon gasped, shocked. “But… but they-”

“Looks like you have no evidence for your bold claims, Gideon,” Pearl shrugged unsympathetically. “You might as well just head on home. It’s probably quite past your bedtime, after all.”

“Well it’s definitely past our bedtimes,” Blubbs concluded with a tired nod. “Come along, Durland. I’ll get pick us up some early morning coffee on the way back to the station.”

“Oh boy!” Durland exclaimed brightly, following his partner up the hill. “Can I have extra whipped cream in mine?!”

“No, wait!” Gideon called out after the cops, only to spin around towards the Gems with a hateful glare. “You conniving lil’ Gems may think you’re so clever, but very soon ya’ll are gonna regret ever makin’ an enemy outta me! You think painting your precious temple all up is bad? Well just wait until I smash it to smithereens!”

“Oh, so you were the one who did that?” Pearl asked, crossing her arms. “And here we were thinking it was Amethyst all this time! I guess we owe her an apology!” she exclaimed lough enough that the purple Gem would easily be able to hear it from her hiding spot.

“And believe us, we’re already regretting having you as an enemy,” Garnet deadpanned. “Having to put up with you alone is about as annoying as it gets.”

Gideon let out a frustrated growl upon hearing this, but even so, he spun on his heels and began to retreat, grumbling threats towards the Gems all the while. Once the child psychic had completely left, Garnet and Pearl called out for the others to assure them that the coast was clear and that they could out. And while the kids were the first ones to rush out and profess how amazed and amused they were with how Garnet and Pearl had handled the situation, but by far, Stan and Amethyst were the ones most impressed.

“Oh my gosh, you guys, what you just did was awesome!” Amethyst exclaimed with a rowdy laugh. “That little chump’s gonna be crying about this for weeks!”

“Yeah, I gotta admit you two pulled a pretty decent con back there,” Stan acknowledged with a smirk. “And believe me, I know all about cons.”

“Thank you, Stan,” Pearl said with a satisfied grin. “But for future reference, don’t ever make us lie like that to cover for you again. I nearly gagged trying to convince myself to call you an honest citizen.”

The group let out a collective laugh at this, one that faded as Steven spoke up. “Aw, well I’m really glad we’re all getting along again! But, uh… could we maybe go home now? I don’t know about you guys, but these past few nights haven’t been the best for sleeping…”

“Agreed,” Dipper said, aptly weary.

“Sleep! Sleep! Sleep!” Mabel cheered with as much waning energy as she could muster.

“Tell me about it, kid,” Stan agreed, rolling his eyes.

“Alright, alright, we’ll take you all home,” Pearl chuckled as her and Garnet began to lead the kids away. “Are you two coming?” she asked Stan and Amethyst.

“Eh, we’ll catch up with you all later,” Stan shrugged. “We still have one more thing we gotta go.”

“Oh yeah! That’s right!” Amethyst exclaimed, remembering Vidalia’s painting. “Uh… we’ll be back in a while. Don’t wait up!”

Pearl prepared to protest this, but Garnet was quick to stop her. “We won’t,” she replied as they all headed off into the woods, leaving the purple Gem and the conman alone once more. A stilted silence lingered between the two of them, especially as they both got back into the car. Only after Stan pulled the car into motion did Amethyst finally break the veil of quietness.  

“Uh… Stan?” she began hesitantly. “I… I, uh… Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it,” Stan said simply, slowly maneuvering through the trees before eventually finding the road again.

“Um… you know, nobody’s ever really… stuck up for me like that before,” Amethyst admitted. “It… it was nice, for a change.”

“Yeah, well nobody stuck up for me the way you did all those years ago, either,” Stan shrugged, cracking a small smile. “So I guess that means we’re finally even, huh?”

“Guess so…” the purple Gem sighed contentedly, though her smile quickly faded. “Uh… I know tonight ended up being a huge mess but… you really did prove that you can still keep up with me so… that’s pretty cool. Guess we’re still sold off of doing any more Revenge Trips though, huh?”

“Are you kidding?! Of course we’re gonna do more!” Stan exclaimed as if it was obvious.

“What? But you said-”

“What, you really think I’m gonna let one bad night stop us now that we got our mojo back? No way! I haven’t felt this young in years. And just for the record, I’d absolutely do tonight over again if I could, mess ups and all.”

“Heh, same here,” Amethyst laughed warmly. “After all, where would mess-ups like us be without plenty of mess-ups of our own?”

“Old and boring,” Stan replied with a smirk. “That’s where. Now, let’s finish this Revenge Trip once and for all. Because how long is this party going?”

Stars were practically in the purple Gem’s eyes as the conman posed this question to her, and she was more than happy to give her usual reply to it. “This party’s going all night long!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to humbly welcome you to my lil’ ol’ Tent of Telepathy!” Gideon quipped brightly, standing between a group of tourists and said tent the following morning. If there was anything the child psychic was good at, it was putting the embarrassing loss he had suffered last night behind him in order to put on his usual schmaltzy show without a hitch. Or so he thought. “Inside this tent, ya’ll will find a world of wonder and enchantment! So why wait any longer? Let’s head on-”

Gideon was abruptly cut off as he walked smack into the wide, large canvas behind him. The child psychic toppled over right along with the elaborate, realistic painting of the Tent of Telepathy, which had been enough to fool even him. His guests all let out simultaneous gasps of shock as the ruse collapsed, revealing the actual tent behind it. Or rather, what was left of it.

Without the pegs to keep it standing, the tent had easily collapsed to the ground overnight, creating a variable disaster in and of itself. Of course, to make matters even worse for Gideon, it had fallen in such a way that it was clear to see the insult spray painted onto it in bold red letters: “Gideon Peeful”.

“W-what?!” Gideon exclaimed, mortified and alarmed as he jumped to his feet. A mix of laughs and boos came from the crowd, which was quick to disband upon realizing the child psychic had nothing to show them.

As Gideon desperately ran after them in an attempt to get them back, he failed to notice the two figures hidden just out of sight in the bushes nearby. Stan and Amethyst finally let loose the pent up laughter they had been holding back once Gideon was out of earshot, both of them exchanging a high five over their rousing success.

“Man, V really came through for us this time!” Amethyst chuckled, glancing at the painting. “That worked perfectly!”

“Hey, all the best Revenge Trips always do, don’t they?” Stan asked with a satisfied grin.

“Heck yeah they do! I already have a bunch of new ideas for our next one, whenever that’ll be. That is, if you’re game for it.”

“You know I am,” Stan nodded, still grinning. “Though, uh, we might wanna wait a while before we pull another one. After something as wild as last night, I’m gonna need a little time to recover, you know?”

“Pfft, whatever you say, old man,” Amethyst joked, elbowing him playfully.

“Now listen, kid,” the conman started, feigning seriousness over this age-old nickname. “I thought I told you to—eh, you know what? What the heck. I’ll let it slide.” He sent a wink to the purple Gem, who was more than happy to return it, just as she always did. “This time.”

 Next: 

[ctsmclovinya]

You would think a full month (near enough) of travelling Europe by train would be as simple as it sounds. Hop on a train, end up in a city, find somewhere to stay, and Bob’s your Uncle; I never did meet Bob. Pints all round and before you know it you’re a local.

You believe you’ll be thinking,

What even is a tourist, OMG.

Well, no.

First up, DO NOT GET TOO CONFIDENT

Our first mistake when booking the Interrailing was to leave looking into it and booking our trains as late as possible. We bought our pass literally two weeks before we were due to leave as we wanted to accumulate enough money as possible so we could essentially do the whole thing correctly and take our time over it, to ensure that we did everything the way WE wanted to. Booking our journeys about 6 days before we left however was never going to be a good idea; is that a surprise though?

You see, through the website portal once you order your pass there is an area where you can literally plan all your train journeys and free of charge (I KNOW RIGHT). While some may be too far in advance, you can reserve seats on these (which is usually all that is needed to be eligible to make a journey) through their actual portal to save yourself stressing whether you can get on that train that will get you to Rome in time to check into your hostel etc.

Exhibit A: A Free service helps you plan out what type of trains you will need and when, down to the exact minute, SO MAKE THE MOST OF IT.

However, you need to book your journey far enough in advance for this to be possible. If your journey is two weeks after you try to do this, there is no chance you are doing it this way…

BUT FEAR NOT, DO NOT PANIC. Although at this point you are left with the challenging and frustrating task of visiting German, Swiss, Italian etc. rail websites and trying to reserve your train through translating them, it is possible. May I add, a lot of them genuinely do not have that oh-so-helpful ‘translate’ button, so you have to Google Translate EVERY SINGLE WORD on that page, and lemme tell ya, THAT. IS. NOT. FUN. But, it’s possible.

HELP YOURSELF OUT

There are resources and ways to help you plan your journey out. If it is easier for you to know where you are on what days and what you have time to do, then print a calendar out.

Almost better than an Advent Calendar… Minus the chocolate of course: This technique will do you wonders when booking your travelling and accommodation.

Organisation never hurt anybody! Keeping a folder to put all your train reservations and hostel bookings in together is super helpful and definitely recommended.

Keeping everything together makes each journey stress-free. Pink folders are also cool, don’t judge.

Hostels are your best friend

Prices, comfort (mainly, I mean it beats a cold hard floor), the possibility to meet people you would never have met otherwise. In a hostel you share rooms with strangers but it’s really not as bad as it sounds. The inhabitants are usually in the same boat as you. They want to see a city, they want to sleep inside for minimal price and, on the most part, usually to make friends. I mentioned in a previous post my past fears of hostels but I could not have been more wrong. Hostels are well and truly a travellers best friend, and I don’t say that lightly.

The only example I have (legally) since taking pictures of rooms isn’t usually my thing, this is CityStay Mitte in Berlin. A good night’s sleep in a fabulous city for on average €23.8 p/night in the middle of August is something you just can’t argue with.

Usually hostels will have games areas, bars, and even kitchens that not only save you money but help you decide the quality of your own food. Furthermore, some even offer free breakfast and the opportunity to have dinner with a group who necessarily maybe don’t want to cook themselves and save those pennies (or cents). Some even have nightclubs attached to them (Try Generator in Paris) and others are in the middle of nowhere (Innsbruck comes to mind), some are even like an actual hotel (Wombats at the Naschmarkt) however, you’re treated the same way that you would be in a hotel. Sharing a bathroom and communal area is really not that bad and if you really cannot go without your own space, many offer private rooms but these are much more pricey.

Hostelworld.com, Kayak, and even Booking.com are the usual booking suspects, but I thoroughly recommend Hostelworld. The ease of booking, the range of hostels that they have available and even the prices, (hostels are so much cheaper than hotels it’s crazy) you would be a fool to ignore how helpful they are.

Airbnb is another option too. The places available are actual homes, definitely like nothing you have ever stayed in abroad before. I’ve heard nothing but great things from people I know who have used it, so it is another option.

Disclaimer: I really make no money whatsoever from hostelworld.com for saying this, so really take my word for it, they made this trip a hell of a lot easier.

Research the cities a little (But surprise yourself a little too)

Correction, surprise yourself A LOT. But, researching a little so that you can utilise your time in each city is certainly a smart way to go about things. You see, travelling for a month will mean that at some point you’ll probably want a little resting time, y’know, the occasional morning where you won’t be getting up at 6am; not that we did that every morning but emphasis always helps my point. While you’re doing this to explore, it’s like a holiday so embrace that factor too.

Planning (even slightly) pays off: Knowing that in Milan we wanted to visit the San Siro, evaluating how much time we had there meant that not only did we get to tour the world famous stadium, but catching a game there was possible too, something we would not have been able to do if we didn’t consider it already.

So, planning pays off. It leaves you with no worries and the freedom to know that you can do what you like when you’re not doing what you planned. Honestly, surprising yourself is even better though, but you still have to get the amount of time you have free correct as well. While you may not be planning to visit 14 different cities in 30 days, having a little idea of what you want to do where you’re going, knowing why you are going there more than that it “looks pretty”, helps. FACTOR IN TRAIN TRAVEL TIME AS WELL. One thing we got wrong was the complete utilisation of our time in Vienna. We did our research while we were IN the city, and that was ultimately our downfall. We had about an hour at the funfair/theme park Prater which we were gutted about because it was somewhere we could have dedicated a whole day to. It happens.

We planned our trip to Pisa and took a Flixbus which, for the record, is another method of travel I would recommend. Another way that you can travel Europe and for a decent rate, with chargers and Wifi on their buses, there are many ways to make your trip less stressful. The issue with our Pisa trip however was that it left us with such little time in Florence that we never really got a feel of the city. Planning IS KEY.

Don’t formulate expectations

Prague, I underestimated you ever so much. From somehow ending up in a gay club (AND HAVING ONE OF MY FAV NIGHTS EVER, MAY I ADD) to meeting literally some of the best people, I'll never forget your ability to amaze me; that, and how cheap things are here. You're way more than absinthe and cheap booze. You make me more thankful than I already am. #Prague #CzechRepublic #Travel #Interrailing #CharlesBridge #StudentNomad

A post shared by C (@thelostenglishman) on Aug 13, 2017 at 2:09am PDT

Prague/Bern blew us away

Long story short, my opinions of Prague were formulated by the gov.uk page on the city (yes, yes, I know!) but in a way this helped it blow me away. The beauty that the city breathed, the prices, the people and the sense of freedom we felt when we were there made it an easy top 3 destination for us.

Rome failed to live up to expectations

Rome on the other hand was not comfortable for either of us. Aside from my stupidity in nearly being run over by a bus (story for another day) the Colosseum and Pantheon were breathtaking landmarks, simply unbelievable to see in person, but even they failed to balance the city for us. The hype we built beforehand was clearly too much as we never felt safe there. Again, expectations.

Budget (Know your limits unless money grows on trees you grow in your garden)

You’re gonna have to sacrifice some things, inevitably. Know how much money you have free (after you book your trains and hostels and even work out food costs). I ended up budgeting on £20 for the last 2 days, did I mention that that was not including food.

Some places will be more expensive than others (Switzerland). To say that it was worth it would really be the biggest understatement (regarding Switzerland anyway) EVER. It was incredible there and it was easy to make exceptions for how expensive it was there, because it was that pretty, however, we made incorrect estimations and money spent exceeded our budgeting. REMEMBER, RESEARCH.

Eating out is expensive – I’m not going to lie to you, we ate out everyday until our 9th city, that’s 17 days into the trip… RESTAURANT FOOD IS GOOD, OK. We were lazy, inconsiderate of the money we took and ultimately paid the price at the end. Buying food in and using the kitchens available to you is a valuable tool my friend, so utilise it while it’s there.

Conversion rates – learn before you go, and maybe take a bit of everything whether it be Euros, Kuna, Franc etc. many of them are different, make it easier on yourself. The rates were fluctuating while we were travelling so buying a little before you go does not do you any harm.

*If you budget correctly, activities such as Disneyland at the end of your trip can be made with no worries. Truthfully, as previously mentioned, my £20 p/day budgeting for the last 5 days of the trip meant I could not afford my ticket. So I gave my buddy a full weeks wage of mine when we got back so I could go… Not everyone has this freedom!*

YOU DON’T NEED TO TAKE YOUR WHOLE WARDROBE – Essentials

(An idea of what to take for a month):

1-2 pairs of shoes

1-2 pairs of long trousers

Girls – Makeup ofc, don’t go overboard – you’re gonna be walking with your bag a lot – be kind to your back.

2-3 pairs of shorts

1 jumper/hoodie

1 small raincoat

5-6 t-shirts

A charging pack and your charger – this will be important since some hostels have a limitation on plug sockets (yes, I know)

Just over a week’s worth of underwear – THERE ARE WASHING MACHINES. UTILISE.

CORRECT PLUGS – Despite being in the same continent, some nations need different plug adaptors, double check this before you go.

SUNCREAM. IT GETS HOT. BE CAREFUL. You can buy this in shops if you forget.

SHOWER GEL/SHAMPOO. You can buy this in shops too.

Books (a few of these) – Travelling alone? It’s good company. Travelling with someone? Sometimes on the train journeys you just want a break from each others voices, work that brain even whilst travelling.

Headphones – a saviour for when you’ve read way too much

Notepad and pen – if you come across something you have to remember or you like writing…

Playing Cards – Something you and your travel companion can interact over.

Travel Insurance – Just in case something happens, be careful homies.

A helpful travel bag – This is key as you will be walking A LOT to hostels and on your final day in cities when you have to hand back your room key because check out is early.

The North Face Base Camp Duffel Bag does not come cheap (we payed at least £90 for ours each) but the freedom to carry it or use it as a backpack made our lives SO much easier with all that walking, SO. MUCH. WALKING. There are many bags like this so choose what one suits you best, whether it be North Face or not, whatever caters to your travel needs.

Fanny Pack (yes, I know) or Waist Wallet – This is so much more important than you think. Keeping your passport and money in a save place on you at all times is important. You might think that it is not fashionable; bear in mind that it goes under your clothes, that it is an inconvenient object, but it proved me wrong and put me at ease even on nights when my paranoia sky rocketed.

The Hydroseal Waterproof Waist Wallet is cheap, has enough space for your cards, passport, and money and is the safest option when it comes to carrying your valuables on you.

I likely forgot something here, but it happens, these are ESSENTIALS.

GET IN THERE BEFORE YOU NEED VISA’S FOR EACH COUNTRY (Post-Brexit life nears… DUN DUN DUN)

You knew the Brexit talk was coming, c’mon, you should’ve prepared for this badboy.

As the UK slowly edges towards no longer being a member of the EU, we start to reminisce about all the things we are going to miss like the freedom to travel to other European countries without having to apply for Visa’s. Once we exit, it is likely that you will need to apply for EVERY country, making interrailing a nightmare, and possibly more expensive too.

The new passports are meant to be blue (WHY BLUE, WHY) and this makes us feel blue, because, just why? Oh politics. Anyway, utilise being part of the EU while you can, cause once it’s gone, it’s gone.

There are likely so many other things on here I have not mentioned, but as I always say, any questions, queries or a general interest in things that happened on our journey, hit me up and I’ll be only too happy to enlighten you. Happy Travels! 🙂

It''s been a while, let's kick off that talk about Inetrrailing yeah? You would think a full month (near enough) of travelling Europe by train would be as simple as it sounds.