#anyway in my sister's and my version of future events that's just how things go

[flowerandjewel]

Hello. I’m Florian, or Mod Flower I guess. My sister and I decided to set up this blog since we’re moving to Paldea soon. We wanted to make friends online at least, since making friends in person at a new school is probably going to be kinda hard. Uhhhh an about me… I like watching competetive battles on tv or mewtube. We’re from Galar so like, battling in general is kinda big culturally, yknow? I could never strategize like some of those gym leaders could though, have you seen Raihan’s weather team?

Okay okay we get it, you’re a nervous mess that likes to watch battles but not train Pokémon yourself. Okay. Hi, I’m mod Jewel, aka Juliana! Said the galarian way not the paldean way. I had to cut out like a paragraph of my brother going onnnnn and on nnnnn about gym leaders and the former champ Leon and strategies and like. Yeah that’s cool or whatever but we’re fifteen, we should be doing that ourselves now! Hopefully once we’re settled in paldea and the issue of school is dealt with, we can have our own exciting adventure!!! -Mod Jewel

This may not matter now, but for the future-

Mod Flower’s Pokémon: Sir Flatbread the Drowzee, Flint the Houndour

Mod Jewel’s Pokémon: Bowsette the Bounsweet, Lapis the Azumarill

Shared Pokémon: Koraidon, Miraidon

(OOC below the cut)

Howdy! I’m vesper, of @vespers-pokeblog-hub fame. This is a pokemon irl liveblog retelling of the events of Pokémon scarlet/violet, but with both protagonists and both versions of the story in one universe

Anyone can interact! I don’t know all the terms or anything, but I treat pokemon as sapient, if usually unable to speak with their trainers in most cases, anyways, and even if it’s other versions of Flori, Jul, their friends, etc, rotomblr is a multiverse imo. The twins are used to rotomblr at this point so they’re just like “oh ok might as well happen” about things.

I would like to ask you guys to not tell them how the story of scavio goes, unless it’s really vague like “the professor thing” or “is Mabosstif ok” or something like that- if you “spoil” their story to them I’m probably just going to ignore the ask.

Mails are okay, magic anons aren’t, I don’t know much about all the other stuff, but I’ll take it on a case by case basis, and I withhold the right to ignore anything that I don’t want to incorporate. Mystery gift is open!

This is really just an excuse to replay scarlet and violet, and a way to dip my toes in the Pokémon irl rp scene with a story I don’t have to completely make up since it’s just the canon story but my version haha.

I don’t really do DNIs because they don’t work imo, but I do block if I don’t like something. This probably won’t matter so long as everyone is normal, but this is tumblr, so like. It is what it is. I’m an adult but flori and Juli are kids so be normal, I’m autistic and might misinterpret things but I’m open to (good faith) correction so be normal, just treat me like you’d wanna be treated and we’ll be chill.

[heliphantie]

It's not symmetrical or perfect But it's beautiful, and it's mine

Some long ramblings about Isabela under 'read more':

I originally didn’t use to be interested in Isabela, brushing her aside as yet another emancipated princess character, but with time, I figured she’s more dimensional and distinctive character of her kind, and possibly, most multifaceted one next to Bruno. More than that, the two, as opposite they look on the surface, have enough things in common for him to have more rapport with her than with Mirabel, as movie seems to suggest.

First of all, magnitude of their powers. All of original triplets have got gifts that surpass any others in the family, outright divine in nature – abilities of healing, conduct the weather and foreseeing future. While out of third generation, Isabela has got an ultimate divine power – of bringing life out of thin air, and in accordance with her emotional state no less. Thus, her powers also require thorough control, which may be another hidden reason for her always needing to keep herself straight. And it’s apparent too, bearers of greatest gifts are also under hardest pressure, with Bruno and Isabela even visually (in the sequence of “Dos Oruguitas”) indicated to be most subjected to.

Second thing is, external and internal presentation. Out of all characters, the two have the most conflict between public perception and genuine expression, and an array of different facades in case of both – from impassive and contemptuous to caring and heartful. We don’t get to see any objective view of Bruno’s behavior in the past, but from how he’s perceived in retrospect, it appears he used to give off impression of distant and uncaring to people around him, which could’ve been simply an effect of his professional duty, including acting impartial to the events he gets to witness as local oracle and avoiding personal interference with anybody’s fate (just my conclusion, anyway). Which is rather similar to Isabela’s acting around people – pleasant, but not extremely intimate, more like performer than participant, and impression of egoistic, haughty person she leaves on Mirabel. (Did encounter with and insight of real Bruno give no clue about what her sister’s situation would be? It’s not a Mirabel-bashing article, but she’s one dense protag, I must say…) In that, they’re two people in family who appear to bottle their feelings and maintain the constructed façade the most of all (“So much hides behind my smile…”). In addition, as parallel to Isabela’s built image of conventional feminine “perfection”, Bruno has his own invented persona of Hernando, which seemingly serves as “perfect”, and more stereotypically masculine version of himself. (Their natural selves are, of course, still properly feminine/masculine, just of more subtle and nuanced variety.)

And what is fundamental trait shared between two: the extreme selflessness and devotion, and sense of responsibility, being prone to self-sacrifice with long-lasting consequences and openly declaring their willingness to give it all for the family. Which also slips into coming to well-intended, but misguided, and even hurtful in perspective, decisions: no, making yourself a traitor in the eyes of your relatives, never getting rewarded for your good will, while for noble reasons, is not going to bring family together, and neither does confining yourself to lifetime of fake love relationship (and hell knows how suppressed discontent seeping through would manifest itself in the end of things… Mariano dodged a bullet, also not deserving such misery). Anyhow, willfully getting your freedom cut short for the rest of your life for the sake of wellbeing and benefit of your loved ones is tremendous sacrifice (and yet again, it’s such a short sight on Mirabel’s part to take confession of that sacrifice lightly, beside of not realizing she is a case of Isa’s predicament, what with approving a proposal behind her sister’s back). And that’s where Isa is deconstructing Disney rebellious princess archetype even before her breaking out: unlike Jasmine or Merida, she actually holds her family in priority over whatever carefree life she could lead, and makes mature move, total opposite of pampered princess Mira thinks she is. It should be said, marriage is not something exactly forced upon Isa, but rather silently accepted on the assumption she does return affection of would-be fiancé. While Isabela seemingly doesn’t have the same luxury as Jasmine to reject suitors left and right (it doesn’t seem there’s a lot of options…), nor fiancé in question is as obnoxious as any of Jasmine’s, or, say, Gaston, she definitely has enough authority around the town to deem any suitor unworthy of herself or make her own choice, so she’s not that submissive in that situation as it may look. (And nothing indicates any of older Madrigals were forced into arranged marriage, which makes me think that is not entirely in Alma’s hands to decide on whom or if her children going to marry.) It appears, based on observation of similarities between Alma and Isa being possible reason for her singling the granddaughter out as her favorite, Alma might just have been projecting her own perfect romance on the young couple, being convinced they’re destined for each other just as she and Pedro were, and have to make up for her own abruptly cut matrimonial bliss, not taking in account Isa doesn’t have to be her carbon copy. Note that, entering marriage, Isa is not simply getting what she (presumably) wants, she puts herself in a role of next (after Julieta, most likely) matriarch, a head of family, a ruler of town, accepting huge responsibility, quite an opposite of effort-free fairytale life.

Which brings me to connection between characters affirmed in the movie itself: what was exact output of Bruno’s words – either prophetic or not – for Isabela? She is the only one, whose prophecy wasn’t appearing to fulfill itself, and she doesn’t comment on it even in the moment of honesty. We never get closure on that issue, let alone any conversation between two (because poor Bruno was denied of opportunity explaining himself properly by his kind relatives…). One answer that seems to be likely correct in context of Bruno’s reputation: because his vision always undoubtedly becomes reality, promise of the dreams coming true was taken for granted, and Isa considered that, as long as she goes with the flow and doesn’t take the initiative in deciding for herself, she obtains happiness by default. So, she’s basically another princess in waiting for the miracle (hm…) until she gets to break free on her own, which is consistent with modern trend of Disney subverting and defeating their own fairytale standard.

But other possible interpretation is: what if that promise, while leading to wrongful and harmful conviction, was giving her strength to follow her path and assigned duty, vested with faith she, by doing right thing, eventually will become a master of her life and achieve fulfillment. (And probably, it makes sense for her to think Mirabel, revealed being linked with imminent destruction of miracle, somehow also leads to her miraculous destiny being dissolved with no hope left.)

Worth noting, it brings up a parallel with classic story about destiny – and also another one of Disney fairytale standard – tale of Sleeping Beauty, blessed with magical gifts and cursed with ominous future, outcome of which tale being basically the same as Encanto movie: fighting future is dangerous, some losses are inevitable, but what’s matter is what we learn and take from it to improve even more distant future. Also, there’s even visual parallel – Aurora’s two-colored in funky manner dress as result of fairy godmothers fighting over its color, and Isabela’s multicolored holi’d dress, I wonder how intentional it was.

And one another minor and not instantly obvious connection, not clearly visible in the movie: both Isa and Bruno may be “brains” of the family! Some concept arts depict Isa being something of a bookworm, and while you have to be really observant (or peek at production art), there’s hints in Bruno’s environment he’s one himself – in addition to some books in his hideout, there’s drawings on the walls showing doodles of rats in casting of stage plays of Shakespeare’s tragedies and “Don Quixote” (both are not exactly light literature).

And while Isabela being an intellectual isn’t something directly stated in the movie, it’s still part of her development and isn’t contradicted by anything on screen. Though she probably may give preference to non-fiction on the topic of biology. Speaking of nerdy inclinations…   

One last (rather tangential) thing worth of discussion: abandoned Bubo storyline and its connection to ultimate version of story. For the aspects that justify it being scraped for good: first, as I stated above, her being actually loyal to family, instead of trying to elope, makes for all more powerful presentation of her character. Second, is unfortunate implication of her being driven to person simply because he understands her (which is valid on its own) rather than because she likes him for his own qualities and personality. But it may be just lack of context for single scene, otherwise dynamic of two people with connection to nature and such contrasting behavior and appear is pretty endearing. (Official source states the storyline is written off so Isa in the end does not “defined by a man”, but then, Mirabel is treated like hero and she’s “defined” by two men, given she’s in need the word of Bruno on what action to take, and if we take literally statement that she was “send by Pedro” to save the family…) So while I appreciate her ending as more independent and decisive person, I still like how concept of that relationship speaks of her personality, and it did find its way in final version, even if in funny way, by replacing man with cactus:) Even as brief moment leading to big reformative number, having her admiring the “imperfect”, peculiar creature gives evidence of her carrying deep fondness for unconventional forms of beauty, fascination for irregular, whimsical (as opposed to what she’s assigned for -  Mariano, while having his own depths and not entirely flawless as well, kind of dorky in his own way, is simply that – conventional and too ordinary for Isa to spark interest). And considering that trait of her was maintained through the variations of story, it seems more than plausible she may develop profound fondness and connection with her eccentric (and definitely “fish out of water”, as Bubo is described) uncle, which makes it a loss that the story didn’t even tipped toe into interaction between the characters. (And it’s hard to overlook, Bubo’s personal and even physical traits also seem to transfer into final version of Bruno, so the character’s concept wasn’t entirely lost either.)

On the final note, bunch of random musings about the character of Isa, that neither here nor there:

Speaking of unpredictable nature of gift and popular parallel between Isabela and Elsa: may it be that Isabela had to teach herself to regulate her power for pretty much the same reason, given connection between emotions and outcome, and inability for child to properly control it? Even in suppressed state, Isa’s powers have dangerous side to them: we see her being able to use vines to restrain people, making flowers grow from every surface, and later she creates carnivorous plants and just unleashes botanical chaos all around the town, not to mention that her negative emotions resurface itself as plants that unsafe for handling. Between Alma’s worried notion that Isabela got “out of control” and Bruno’s reluctance to face her (which he only partially admits to be for the fear to meet Alma), there could be something that young (and simply not being in existence yet) Mirabel might not knowing about full effect of Isa’s power when unbound and under emotional affect.

And one aspect that felt conflicting to me for some time: as for type of person with “green thumb” she’s supposed to embody (and more prominent “child of nature” image with which her character was conceived at first), Isabela acts rather violently, shown destroying her creations, plucking roses out of her flower bed, ruining topiary and such. But considering she’s not simply nature lover and expert (who she seems to genuinely be), but embodiment of nature itself, like Pepa is an embodiment of atmospheric forces, it’s organic for her to having embraced its destructive side as well, as part of death and resurrection circle. /So she’s a bit of like Stitch, with equally creative and destructive inclinations at one because of immense abilities she’s packed with:)/

I definitely have a little more to say, and contemplate, about the character… but some of it going too far into speculative and fanfic-y territory, so it’s a topic for another time. And sorry for all incidental Mirabel kicking:) – I have things to say about her too, but in its own turn.

[entityupdates]

This post contains spoilers for chapter 13 of Destructive Interference.

So. N. Looking forward to the comments to see if this made sense or not.

Quick summary of what was revealed in chapter 13: Ingo's Zorua siblings from Hisui were reincarnated as N and a Unovan Zoroark in modern times.

The in-universe explanation is basically just that sometimes Zorua spirits don't want to die and Ingo's Zorua brother and sister weren't done being part of Ingos story.

The real explanation is far longer.

Initially I was going to talk about this in Boss, Warden, Alpha (the unused but still posted epilogue where Ingo writes a memoir about the events of Masking) but I started writing Destructive Interference before I posted Boss, Warden, Alpha so this little detail was edited out:

Originally Ingo's Zorua brother was going to be a past incarnate of Emmet and Ingo's Zorua sister was going to be a past incarnate of Elesa.

Only two people have noticed this so far! I mostly edited it out of Masking but there are a few lines in the early chapters, especially chapter 1, that referenced this. The main thing that remained is that Ingo's sister/not-Elesa-anymore/Theta prefers to disguise herself as an Electric-type (Luxray) but there are a few other details intended to be foreshadowing were left in.

Note: Destructive Interference is a spin-off so Runt and Theta are not Emmet and Elesa or N in Masking. The timeline doesn't make sense for that.

To lay it out a little more clearly:

In Masking, Runt's ghost/soul (ghosts and souls are not the same thing in this fic but for convenience let's say they are) was taken from one of Lady Sneasler's kits. He goes to the modern world and was not further reincarnated. Ingo's sister's ghost/soul was taken from an Alpha Luxray. She remained in Hisui so it is still possible for her to be reincarnated as Elesa but I've never touched on this and don't plan to.

In Destructive Interference, Runt is a Sneasler kit turned Hisuian Zorua turned N. I never address if N is a Zoroark disguised as a human or not but it is implied that his past life as a Zorua is the reason he can understand Pokémon. Theta (Ingo's sister) was an Alpha Luxray turned Hisuian Zorua/Zoroark turned Unovan Zoroark. It is implied that N and Theta were reborn in modern Unova through "regular" means of reincarnation.

The original version of Masking had Ingo's Zorua siblings be "new" ghosts/souls. When they died in Hisui, they were reincarnated as Emmet and Elesa in modern Unova. I decided not to stick with this idea because I thought it was too complicated and would distract from my original intention with Masking (to explore how Zoroark illusions work but I gave up on that like halfway through and no one cared anyway).

I'm thinking about eventually doing another spin-off where I write out this idea of Emmet and Elesa as future lives of Runt and Theta but I don't want to commit to anything.

But back to Destructive Interference, it does seem kind of random that N and his Zoroark friend are Ingo's siblings and they're not in the fic for very long. This is intentional. Sometimes there are just regular people in stories that aren't main characters but affect the plot. Arceus just thought they deserved to know where their brother ended up and sent them to the future.

Runt and Theta totally could've been Emmet and Elesa in Destructive Interference but the appeal of the fic is waiting for Emmet's reaction when he learns Ingo is a Zoroark so if Emmet was also a Zoroark, I don't think it would be as satisfying.

TLDR; N and Theta are reincarnations of Ingo's Zorua siblings because they were always intended to be reincarnated.

[scribhneoirtuirseach]

Slices of Lives (also on AO3)

featuring: a sentimental Carlos, a sleeping Cecil, and a lot of dialogue

references: 1983 (Episode 67: [Best Of?]), the Underground City (Episode 107: The Missing Sky), Esteban (only a mention)

wordcount: 854

“The place is here and the time is now. To be more specific, 'here' is our couch in the living room, and 'now' is a late Friday evening. You've had a busy news week, with all the usual nearly town-ending crises— And, as usual, the town remains.”

Carlos speaks softly, yet still just loud enough to be heard by his tape recorder, as he threads his fingers through Cecil's hair.

“There is a thing that we've both said often, so much so that I probably don't need to say it for you to know, but I will anyway; Past performance is not an indicator of future results. I think about that a lot. I think about when the different realities of Night Vale were collapsing in on each other pretty violently. Do you remember?”

It's a hypothetical question that of course goes unanswered by his sleeping husband, whose sounds of radio static while he rests acts as comforting white noise in the background of the recording.

“I remember you saying you had a brother visiting, and how when you had him, my office and I were gone. I remember having three radios in the lab playing at once. One played current broadcasts as usual, and the other two played two different realities on repeat. One of you at the end of the world, lamenting your lack of a loved one while you were alone in your booth, and the other where you were one of those tiny people living in the Underground City.”

The scientist pauses here, thoughtful. He is often thoughtful, as being a scientist requires mostly thinking— But it's always felt different when examining personal issues. Feelings are still difficult to examine at times.

“I think of how improbable the chances were for us to pair up the way we have. For us to even meet in the first place, given how elusive Night Vale is as a town. There are infinite possibilities of how things could have happened; Possibilities I also think of when I look at our sister cities and their respective radio hosts, their possible partners. But this version of us, in this particular reality? We made it. We met, and we married, and we made a family together. I feel… scientifically lucky.

In science, there are three proposed types of luck. A supernatural event, an explanation people use to make sense of certain events, and a personal attribute one has within themselves. The Roman philosopher Seneca once said that luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity. I'm glad this me came here prepared, even if it took a year to trust in it… Even if I delayed things, with being in the Desert Otherworld.”

Here, Cecil grunts as though he heard that location crystal clear through his dreaming, and Carlos smiles.

“I don't think I apologise enough for that, or for not telling the whole truth of my side of that. I know—” He chuckles. “I know you'll say it's fine, whenever you hear this. You're good like that, always so reassuring to anyone about anything, but still. I'm sorry, and I love you. I don't think I say that enough either. Or maybe I say it too much? There's a fear that saying words too often will make them lose their meaning, but I hope not. I make an effort to say what I mean, even if it's difficult.

This… is difficult. Talking to you on the radio is one thing, because I talk to you and you answer, and in my mind it is just the two of us when I know the whole community is listening. I know only you will hear this, but you don't answer yet. While I sit normally on our couch, you lay curled up, head against my stomach and arms around me, like I might go somewhere. I won't. Not in this reality. Past performance is not an indicator of future results… But I choose to believe we are in the best reality we can be. That though there will be bumps in the road, we'll make it through to the other side mostly unscathed, and whatever that other side holds will be what we want or need. That if we do end up parted, we will find our way back to each other and continue on with this strange life.”

He takes in a deep breath, as though realising he hasn't done that for a while in the midst of his rambling. And in taking that break— He thinks he may be done. The feelings, and the worries that lay just beneath them, are off his shoulders. Not to mention, he's running out of tape.

“I hope it will be a long life together. I hope Esteban will be as lucky as we have been, if he wants to find a lifelong partner. And if not, I hope he enjoys whatever profession he finds himself in. I hope that you're having a nice dream,” Leaning down as best he can, Carlos presses a kiss to Cecil's head. “I love you, honey-voiced honey. Thank you for loving me too.”

[godsofhumanity]

I meant hera and demeter sisterhood hcs loooool

oooohhh lmfaoo sorry haha, WHEW! i was worried someone read my hc and was like "yeah that's romantic".. ewww they are SISTERS in the sibling-sense.

so, Hera and Demeter are like two sides of the same coin to me.. Demeter physically looks like Rhea, but Hera has a lot of Rhea's personality.. so they kinda balance each other out. like, Rhea's whole character gets embodied between the two girls (im not talking about Hestia in this post haha).

anyways, this is important to me because, in my hc's, Rhea sticks around with Kronos for a REALLY long time before she finally puts her foot down.. and i mean, she goes through A LOT. similarly, Hera also sticks around with Zeus for a REALLY long time.. and unlike Rhea, Hera never gets to finally be free of her difficult husband.

now, naturally, i think Zeus and Kronos are on different levels, and there are reasons why i think it was necessary that Kronos x Rhea didn't last, but Zeus x Hera do, but i won't explore that here... my point is that i think Rhea has a hugeee heart, and was extremely forgiving (note: she's not a pushover, she doesn't love Kronos, but she forgives him for all the pain he causes her because she's just the bigger person)... and i think that's similar to Hera always opening her arms to Zeus every time he betrays her heart. Hera inherits Rhea's forgiving nature.

meanwhile, Demeter is wayyy more rigid. she doesn't stay on Olympus because she knows the absolute dogs many of the gods are on Olympus... and she hates the environment. she hates the debauchery, the competitiveness, the corruption. she saw it once, and she will never give Olympus another chance. that's why there's no question that Persephone will be raised away from Olympus... Demeter is unforgiving.

this is where the sisters balance each other out. Hera teaches Demeter to open her heart a little more, Demeter teaches Hera to stand up for herself and fight harder. in this way, both learn the right time to wage war and the right time to end it.

my classic example is the Persephone and Hades myth. we all know how pissed off Demeter was when she learnt of Hades and Zeus' secret arrangement.. in my version of events, after Persephone spends time in the Underworld and learns of a future where she could be a great goddess on her own, not under the shadow of Demeter, she decides to seize that opportunity (she does not love Hades at that time, she just has ambitions and wants to make the most of her godhood), however, when she learns that Demeter's gonna starve the world to death, she decides that she should go home because she doesn't want everyone else to suffer. in Olympus, Zeus, Demeter and Hades are all arguing about what should happen to Persephone, and Hera is the one who is like, "hey let's listen to what Persephone wants"... and by doing that, i think Hera helps Demeter to forgive not Hades, but Persephone.. she helps Demeter let go of her daughter and understand that Persephone isn't leaving her and isn't betraying her.. she kinda opens Demeter's heart up a little.. idk if i explained that properly.

anyways, my point is that Demeter and Hera help each other develop.

i imagine Demeter to be Hera's closest confidant in all the affairs that go down in Olympus. i like the idea of Demeter being the one who encourages Hera to put her foot down to Zeus, and i like the idea of Demeter being on Hera's side for all of those mini-(failed)-rebellions that we see Hera lead against Zeus in the myths. to be clear, i don't think Demeter encourages Hera to abuse Zeus' mistresses-- that's Hera's own thing. but i do think Demeter helps Hera to be a little tougher.

i think Hera spends the most time in Demeter's company, like on her farm... i think both women appreciate being away from the buzz of Olympus... i imagine that in their youth, when the second generation of titans and the Olympians were on good terms (i.e., before the punishment of Prometheus), Demeter and Hera would have gotten away from the busyness of Olympus by hiding out on Asteria's island (which was forbidden to all gods/men), and they would spend their time with the other girls; Hesione (Prometheus' wife), Metis (this would have been before her death), Asteria, Styx, Eos, Selene, etc., dancing, frolicking in the fields, making flower crowns, sparring, etc.

and then after the titans left Olympus when relationships broke down, Hera and Demeter were kind of the only ones left... that's how they started hanging around Demeter's farm instead of Asteria's island.

anyways. they are super tight and are essentially each other's best friend <33

[adanaac]

Could I ask about your OC's? Specifically Ophicucus and Tsuru, I love how majestic Ophi is drawn and Tsuru fascinates me both with the concept and also how lovely you have illustrated him.

I hope you are well, and thank you again for helping me with my questions o7.

Sincerely HMAD.

oh good i get to talk about my son!!

my blorbo my beloved my babygirl he means everything to me

i made him in 2017 so hes sort of grown up with me (or i've grown up and realised things about him that i couldn't have when i was younger. i have so many complicated feelings abt this that i made a short comic about it last year)

to preface this im not a great writer dont expect good writing from me lol all i have is my personal experience and stealing tropes from stories i like

(got a lot to say so its all going under the cut. also a lot of death mention)

So. who is this dude

Tsuru (not his real name in-story, i havent come up with one im happy with), 18 years old, a ghost

he has a little sister, Ori, 15, who was meant to be my sona but then i just drew him more and like drawing him more anyway

first 2 drawings i ever did of him. he was based off natori natsume yuujinchou at this point, i dont remember why or if i even liked natori that much, but i remember distinctly hes based off him

u may have noticed he sort of looks older in my older art. this is because first of all art style drift lol but also as ive gotten older ive figured out that 18 isnt actually that old.

theres also a black haired version of him (two actually) its basically something like this ⬇️

important to know that everything about this dude is a convoluted metaphor

i lovingly summarize white tsuru as "people pleaser" and black tsuru as "nihilist prick" in my head and those are the things consistent throughout all the AU versions of him

(important differences only to me) alive tsuru doesnt act like black tsuru at all thats just his warped self perception (he also doesnt act exactly like white tsuru either)

also alive tsuru has black eyes and the shortest hair, black tsuru has blue eyes and slightly longer hair (also white tsuru is slightly taller than both of them)

if they all existed at the same time they would hate each other on sight but fortunately (unfortunately?) he is just 1 dude with issues

the general vibe is white tsuru is the "yippee floaty trickster" brand of ghost and black tsuru is the sort of ghost in horror media that stands just outside your field of view in the darkness dripping with blood

for the longest time only white haired tsuru was a "character", "black haired tsuru" existed just as his corpse at most, a footnote

but over the past 2 years ive figured that hes actually really fun to draw and play with, and in a different way than white tsuru

(wait fuck isnt this just abe trio. i do always almost accidentally draw tsuru when im trying to draw haruaki.... fuck.....)

(ive had tsuru for long enough that i just keep tacking details from my fav characters onto him.....)

halls smp

so ive been on this minecraft roleplay server called halls smp with other artists for the past 2 years, theres a new season of it every few months with a different theme each time to keep things fresh and ive just been making AU versions of tsuru for it so ive had a lot of opportunity to think about him

season 1 - halloween - jiangshi tsuru

this one is almost entirely unchanged from his base characterization because i didnt want to rp too much and also didnt know there would be future seasons at this point (also basically after the first day i gave up on being called "tsuru" bc its too hard to pronounce and everyone called me canada anyway)

same basic story, guy dies and theres now a white haired version of him (actually this is the same for all the AUs). in fact im pretty sure the black haired version of this one is exactly base alivetsuru. basically what ive been interested in exploring is different kinds of death, the events leading up to it, and what kind of person he becomes afterwards (but also in equal amounts im interested in making fun designs and playing minecraft and fucking around)

(this feels like the start of the beginners guide...)

i associate him with doves and at the time, tarot card 18: the moon, but in retrospect i now think he's card 0: the fool.

season 2 - winter - ishmael

guy who died at sea and eaten by a interdimensional whale and got isekaied. loosely conceptually based off moby dick, although i havent actually read it LOL but i did spend a week reading up on drowning and hypothermia

strangely, his death didnt create a white haired version of him, perhaps because he didnt have anything in life to give up his identity and replace it with. (and also remember the hair color doesnt actually mean dead/alive)

im only calling him ishmael now in retrospect, at the time he was just tsuru/canada

while designing him i had the biggest crisis bc i didnt want him to look to much like this old old oc i had (pic 1) but then i sucked it up and went with it anyway

i never got around to drawing it but his fingers are black from frostbite thats why he wears gloves all the time.

hes one of my favorite iterations of tsuru he looks so mad or upset all the time it makes me want to tease him, and also i think the grey skin and eyebags are very cute

i associate him with whales and tarot card 18: the moon

season 3 - golden grove - fox tsuru

honestly i think this is my favorite design of him i kinda popped off. i think im just a lot more comfortable working with warm colors. and also i associate white tsuru with foxes anyway (black tsuru is totally a catboy btw) (why is he not associated with cranes if his name is tsuru you ask?? bc cranes are hard to draw next question. he did start out based off cranes tbf, thats where the white hair and the tallness comes from)

dead fox possessing his dead human friend's body (although thats only the most literal interpretation of events; in all these iterations there's only ever been 1 person) the white tsurus are mostly interested in "moving on", whatever that means to each of them

btw my banner on this blog is him

hes sort of a set with s2 tsuru to me, mostly bc theyre the ideals that "white tsuru" and "black tsuru" hold taken to the extremes, and also theyre on opposite ends of the "hates people hates talking" and "loves to talk and mess with people" scale

anyway. hes tarot card 10: wheel of fortune to me

season 4 - wild west - mirage

the desert dragon, mirage. this is the season i started giving them actual names that arent "tsuru" and putting actual thought into the story lol previously it was just vibes-based character design. i have a short thing written about him thats meant to be the script for a comic, but i never got around to drawing it.

a sandworm-esque dragon that got tired of being a dragon and took up a passing witch's offer to give him a human form. this is all a metaphor i think. he has longer hair bc i wanted to spice things up a little

(also i consider this a form of death bc he left behind a giant sandworm/dragon skeleton somewhere in the desert)

the mirage-dragon thing comes from the shen 蜃 (which is used in the chinese word for mirage, 海市蜃楼 haishi shenlou, literally translating to "ocean city and shen's castle"). it's a clam-like dragon that produces foam that creates mirages over the ocean.

if u read "even if you slit my mouth", this is what the "shinkiro" or "shin" in recent chapters is. (i had one of those "smug because i already know all about the mythological creature a story is referencing" moments, which i also had with the four gods in yohaji bc i used to translate a game that mentioned them too)

isnt it romantic in a way? that the two places mirages are most known for happening are the ocean and the desert.

i dont have too much art of him because around this time i was uhhh (checks calendar) got back into yohaji and got consumed by it for a couple months lol (can u even blame me. it was july to september that was when like chapter 91 came out lol)

an earlier version of his design that i didnt end up using but i still really like this art

hes tarot card 9: the hermit to me

season 5 - fairytales/medieval - ophiuchus

NO FUCKING WAY YOURE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS for this one i actually ironed out what kind of people the black haired and white haired versions of him are. and also specifically this one isnt black tsuru but alive tsuru

i have a short poem thing about him, to summarize its like so many other fairytales about grateful animals granting their saviors something, but it doesnt end well for anyone

hes based off ophiuchus and asclepius of course, but also a lot of other snake stories in general, like the lindwurm and baishezhuan

to reiterate, for none of these stories do i consider there to ever actually have been 2 separate people, its always just 1 fucked up guy

i also sort of consider him to be a set with mirage, for both being serpents, and also for being "black tsuru whose personality is like white tsuru" and "white tsuru whose personality is like black tsuru", thereby codifying for myself that to him, someone who's stuck in his own head a lot, what matters most to him is his ideals, what all his actions are in pursuit of

he's tarot card 12: the hanged man to me

bonus: dnd character - alba

i also have a version of him i play for dnd, named alba to match with my party who all have color themed names. a halfling ranger who's very small and very loud. except he has amnesia and cant remember anything from before he was 12 (hes around 18 now according to him), including that he's actually a changeling who just transformed into a halfling to seem older than he is to work at a bar and nearly died in a bar fight.

(if you spend as much time fretting over semantics as me, you may note that changelings are medium sized and cannot transform into halflings which are small sized, for which my explanation is that he's been in halfling form since he was a kid, and after the amnesia he thought he actually was a halfling. this is also why his hair is white btw bc changelings have white hair. pre-amnesia in his "actual" halfling transformation he had black hair. i care too much about semantics but hey isnt dnd the semantics game anyway?)

anyway congrats alba for being the only version of tsuru that hasn't outright "died"!! if only because dnd has actual rules and i can't pull my usual death-ghost nonsense as easily!!!

hes very ship of theseus to me, all versions of him are. what makes up a person? what defines them? is it their face, their appearance, their name? their personality, their memories, their ideals? if you slowly replace each of those, one at a time, with a copy thats very similar to the original, at what point are you a different person?

as thanks for reading all of this i'll reveal what some of the metaphors are, the core of who tsuru, as a character, is to me. maybe this is fairly obvious, but all the death and personality weirdness stuff is a convoluted metaphor for depression and autism, as well as the experience of reading the things you've written years ago, seeing old photos and others talking about who you were years ago and finding that person wholly unfamiliar, that you understand the thought process of that person no more than you would a stranger's, as a result of having taken apart your identity and replaced it piece by piece with things from people you like more than yourself.

im always scared of scrutinizing tsuru too hard because he's just a weird reflection of myself, and i think i'll only be able to write a version of him thats more of a "whole person" once i figure that out for myself. the only way you see your own reflection is through a mirror after all, a flattened 2D surface.

haha this got kinda weird and depressing and personal at the end (mostly bc ive been writing this in the middle of the night, its now 4am)

after seeing my soul laid bare like this, if theres one takeaway, i think its pretty obvious why i'm so enamored by the parts of yohaji that i talk about often (huh wasnt this a post about my oc why did it become about yohaji)

oh yeah i just realised u probably also wanted to hear more about my yohaji version of tsuru specifically. honestly theres not really more to it i just like drawing him in situations. like of course the same themes apply but i just like drawing this dude thats 90% the reason hes my sona. like heres a pokemon au of him i drew recently bc i wanted to draw them as kids and also as pokemon gijinkas

anyway thats all. not really bc i could go on and on about him but this is way too long and also way too personal at this point. i think about him a disproportionate amount, i only have 2 other ocs i remotely care about and the extent of my thoughts for those guys is "i think hes fun 👍"

this has probably also been like, the 3rd most comprehensive description of tsuru that ive made, 1st being the thoughts in my head and 2nd being the past 5 years worth of DMs with my friend who i talk about tsuru with

(why was this sort of structured like the beginners guide. if youve seen the beginners guide tell me if im right or delusional. if u havent, go watch a playthrough of it, have an existential crisis, and then afterwards tell me)

[maryellencarter]

so sleep is refusing to happen, which is very annoying. i took my night meds and wore my blindfold and everything. my right leg has also decided it is stabbing pains time, which might be associated with the first thing. so while i wait for some ibuprofen to kick in, i figured i would start to explain my latest effort in the ongoing saga of getting myself to actually go to work.

so i was talking to logan about it, as one does. i haven't even explained logan for the sherlock holmes people, have i? call him my imaginary friend, close enough. he's a version of wolverine from the x-men (comics version circa 1983 if you want to get specific -- hugh jackman is a foot too tall and looks oddly like peter lorre to my prosopagnosic ass), he's my big brother via my teenage mary sue (that's a whole other post, but my little sister maintained this au where we all got to pick our own fictional or invented parents and relatives, which says exactly the things about our irl family situation that you'd think), he's been with me for nearly twenty years now, saved my life multiple times, got me out of some truly horrendous situations. these days he mainly shows up when things are Very Bad. and right now, because i'm struggling to get myself to go to or stay at work by any damn motivation whatsoever, things are pretty damn bad.

so i was talking to logan about it, which i've been doing for a bit while, but this time we were talking about the delayed gratification aspect of a paycheck. how if i skip work and go do a fun thing, i get to have fun immediately, but if i sit at work being mildly bored and intermittently annoyed, then i get money 1-3 weeks later, which might as well be the heat death of the universe as far as actually making an emotional connection between action and reward is concerned.

(it might be relevant to explain what i even do, huh? text chat tech support for a major cell phone company, basically. it's the sort of job where the elevator pitch is like "living the dream", because i get to sit around at home in whatever state of dress i prefer, doing anything i want as long as i keep an eye on my workstation and drop everything when a message from a customer comes in. on slow days it can be a good 15-20 minutes between customers. on busy days, i can be typing nonstop for hours, but those are rarer. however, when faced with a basic choice between "i can't practically play certain video games or do complicated crafts on the clock, because they're too space consuming or not pauseable enough, and I definitely can't go to any events or meet people" versus "if I'm not on the clock I can do whatever I want", it's hard to prioritize Getting Money At Some Future Point.)

so anyway what logan suggested was -- because i know how to calculate my own payroll taxes and often do it for fun (in fact, it probably indicates just how badly off i've been emotionally that i hadn't even downloaded the 2023 irs schedule 15-t for payroll tax brackets until yesterday), i have the ability to figure out, down to the minute if necessary, exactly how much my take-home pay will be based on time worked so far. because logan is inside my head, he also knows that i used to really enjoy being the banker for monopoly, organizing all the play money and making change and keeping track of Amounts and what-all.

so he suggested getting some play money and paying myself in realtime -- basically creating a physical representation of how my paycheck is accruing. i have sat at work for so many minutes, pay myself a dollar. like gamifying shit, but instead of getting a little token in an app that doesn't directly relate to anything irl, i'm getting tokens that very directly represent the exact benefit i am getting by sitting around being annoyed that i don't have room for my gaming laptop next to my workstation.

at this point it becomes relevant that the game of monopoly no longer comes with play money. the company that sells it decided, some years back, that declining sales were due to cash being insufficiently hip with the kids and making change being an absolute turn-off, rather than... you know, literally nobody anymore having the free time for an all-day game that causes intergenerational feuds. so they replaced the paper money with play debit cards and a digital voice-activated top hat that does all the math for you. so now you don't even get any practical life skills with your intergenerational feuds!

so, after a couple of shopping adventures, i have procured construction paper and a silver sharpie (and a working black one because mine was dead) and a clear jar so i can see all the colorful play moneys when i pay myself. i have adapted the rupee color system from breath of the wild, because i'm already familiar with it, to fit the colors of construction paper i have, so ones are green, fives are blue, and so forth.

i tried this method at work yesterday, and so far i'm very excited about it. it takes me about six hours of work to cover my healthcare deductions for a two-week pay period, and after that (until federal tax brackets kick in after a few days' earnings) i basically earn a dollar every four minutes after tax, which means roughly every time i start to get bored, i've earned another dollar and i get to fidget with my little pieces of construction paper again.

i'm also definitely going to have to confront the thing where it feels wrong and unrealistic that i make this much money. because in an eight hour workday near the beginning of the pay period, my take home pay is about $120, and that just feels like a silly amount that doesn't apply to me. but, well, i earned this dollar, and also that one, and the other one over there... which one didn't i earn? it is a conundrum.

i don't know if i'm just excited because everything is shiny and new, but i definitely am very excited that this might actually Help, because it's making being at work *feel* different in a way that hasn't happened before. have a couple of pictures.

[troutfur]

Oh my god the festival! Yes they would 100% reenact the festival under the roles of their future clans! That would be a golden opportunity for them to be stolen you are so correct I'll note that down for later.

Yeah Frostflower really wasn't sure about Firepaw and even though she insisted on his place in the clan due to the prophecy she personally kept a distance. Firepaw does earn her respect eventually though, helped by her mate Lionheart having a soft spot for him since he acted as his mentor before Bluestar stepped in. Makes it worse when it all crashes down. They do manage to reconcile after Bluestars breakdown though, largely due to Cinderpaw still being close to Fireheart and partially out of necessity.

About the Dogs: So it was super important to me that I kept the canon injuries for the sisters so Brightpaw still goes with Swiftpaw to hunt down the dogs. However shes not entirely untrained, when Cinderpaw was injured they ended up swapping training for a while and Brightpaw trains under Whitestorm (since 3 apprentices between 2 cats is already a handful). Swiftpaw is fed up of being an apprentice for so long and Brightpaw gets caught up in the thrill of being a warrior - although the change in training was temporary Bluestar isn't in the headspace to make readjustments and isnt listening to Starclan and by extension Frostflower. When Brightpaw ends up wounded the mentorships switch back and once recovered a bit she is back to the herbs.

Related to the above though I will say Brightheart and Cinderstream (am I referencing Silverstream? Perhaps) have an interesting dynamic once Frostflower is gone. They are both Augurs, with Brightheart as the Matriarch, but often switch between themselves what roles they carry out. They manage to balance out so that neither has to entirely give up warrior duties and stay stuck in the Augurs den. When Brightheart is expecting though Cinderstream takes the role full time until Brightheart is ready to come back. I just dont see either being fully content without having some outlet for their warrior side.

Yeah DoveIvy and HollyLionJay are around the same age here! With no Bracken around Thunderclan theres no HoneyCinderPoppy so instead the apprentice gang for Po3 would be BerryHazelMouse, DoveIvy and HollyLionJay (you could even throw in AlderSpark if you wanted to be REALLY chaotic)

With BrightCloud I must admit I haven't thought that hard about how the clan sees them, I just knew I had to keep them together because they were my very first OTP when I was like 10<3

AGAIN SORRY FOR THE WALL OF TEXT BUT GLAD YOU LIKE IT!

Don't apologize! It's all very readable and it always leaves a huge grin on my face knowing I've inspired someone else! You've got a great thing going on here, if you are inclined to considering writing this out as a fic or something you'd have my full support.

I'm glad Frostflower and Fireheart managed to reconcile, that's nice for them. Love how he interacts with the Frost family, it's a very sweet if turbulent dynamic between them all.

I like that for them! 3 apprentices at once is certainly a lot and I'm sure the augurs' den was really cramped during that particular period. I like the idea that officially Brightheart gets the title of matriarch as the one initially supposed to stay in ThunderClan but them swapping duties every so often. Certainly an unorthodox way to run things, but Brightheart has the authority to make it so.

YES! The huge apprentice generation in Po3 is my favorite, wish we'd seen more of it! Not to mention how it shifts the dynamic between Jay, Lion, and Dove if they're the same age-ish. Augur AU is already a no powers AU so it's already drastically different anyway, but I still like what this shift brings to the table. I like the idea that in another version of events they could've all been really good friends and I love the possibilities in Jay, Holly, Lion, Dove, and Ivy growing up together.

They deserve to be together, truly!

Thanks for all the delicious thoughts once again, you guys are the best. <3

[inked-out-trees]

Tell me about fixed point my friend. In return I offer a monologue from one if my stage scripts, Matthew's Marvelous and Mystifying Magic Act (ironically preceding my knowledge of magic goes wrong)

Matt Thank you, to those of you who have stuck around to see the latter half of the production. We’ve had a few minor hiccups, but the show must go on, as I have to fulfil a contractual obligation to our sponsor: Wowzafresh cleaning products; scrub away your past with the all new ultra deluxe exfoliator, not safe for human use. Anyways, it seems my parents have still not arrived, though upon checking my email I’ve found that in response to the tickets I sent my mother she has sent back a link to a two year course in Accounting. Perhaps she is hoping I will one day take after my younger sister, a rather successful paralegal, in having a career she can tell her book club about and not receive condolences in return. Still, as a brief note the rabbit has been captured and safely returned to its cage and Sasha and I will be arranging a carpool after the performance to get rabies shots. I would highly encourage any of you who may have come into contact with it to do the same. Now, back to the magic!

(He is visibly startled by the smoke bomb this time, not managing to exit before it dissipates. Instead he just waits for Sasha to open the curtain.)

man i'm starting to think that you didn't find the goes wrong franchise... the goes wrong franchise found you

as a (fictional) scientific concept, the fixed point theory is a maxim of time travel that suggests that the progression of events is relatively immutable - summed up in the phrase anything that has happened will happen, and anything that will happen has happened. mainly, if a person goes back in time to do anything, whatever they do will ultimately contribute to the version of the "future" they know. vanessa speaks to this rather confusingly in the first chapter: "if she went back and time and killed her grandfather, she wouldn't cease to exist because her grandfather wasn't actually her grandfather, and this was how time was and he would always die like that. or something."

specific events are known as Fixed Points - moments in time that everything surrounds, like nails in a string, things that Cannot Be Changed, even as little bits and pieces shift and twist. most of what we know as history consists of fixed events. the shattering of the cornely drama society is also a fixed point.

this reminds us, as time travelers, that despite the freedom and adventure that comes with it, all our choices still have lasting effects - you can't go back and change it once it's happened. as a bonus, it means that the cpds didn't fuck anything up when they went to the seventies 😁

(also, it's just very important to the plot.)

thanks for the ask you're the best!!!

[panharmonium]

now that tumblr automatically forces an op to see your tags, i don’t like rambling to myself about unrelated fandom stuff in the tags of posts that aren’t mine, BUT i also hate not being able to finish my self-indulgent thoughts on whatever fannish nonsense pops into my head, so re: this image from earlier (source):

the point i was trying to make -

- is that sasuke is a cat person, and the chart above is definitely another one of the diagrams he drew during Unofficial Therapy

[favefandomimagines]

Be Kind (r.c)

Summary: the facade Rafe puts up has caused tension in your relationship

AN: this is inspired by the song ‘Be Kind,’ by Marshmello and Halsey. also threw a little klaroline quote in there

quick PSA, i don’t condone anything Rafe does in the show at all. He killed a cop and was just a sadistic asshole. SO THIS IS NOT CANON RAFE i just wanted to make that clear and i DO NOT condone domestic violence of any kind, verbal or physical.

You’ve put up with Rafe Cameron for two years. But you didn’t used to phrase it like that until recently.

Rafe puts on a mask when he’s with Topper or Kelce or any of his other Kook friends. He never used to do that with you. He wasn’t afraid to show how he was really feeling. But when he turned to drugs, that mask was kept on permanently.

He wasn’t kind to you anymore. Didn’t call to ask how your day was, didn’t stay up late with you combing his fingers through your hair while he vividly described your future after college.

It was almost as if the cocaine made that version of him dormant. It wasn’t something you ever planned on getting used to. But for the foreseeable future, you had too. 

There was a huge Kook party that was being held at your house, your younger brother Topper being the host.

That’s how you and Rafe initially got together. It didn’t matter that you were one year younger. The connection was there. 

All of your ‘friends’ were there and you somehow managed to convince Topper to invite the Pogues. They were more your friends than anyone on Figure 8 anyways.

You didn’t know Rafe had brought the drugs. Not until Kiara was the one to point it out. He had told you he quit a long time ago so you had to see it for yourself. 

“Y/N, I thought you said Rafe quit?” She asked. You followed where she was pointing and saw your boyfriend doing a line off the glass coffee table.

Both Kie and JJ saw your face contorted with not just anger, but disappointment and disgust as well.

Rafe gets angry when he’s high so you knew you had to get him somewhere quiet until he came down. Usually he always started a fight with JJ or some other random person just for the sake of fighting. 

You carefully approached him, him having at least four inches of height over you.

“Baby, maybe we should go get you some water.” You said sweetly, touching his arm gently. “I’m fine, Y/N.” He protested, pulling his arm back rather violently. “Rafe, come on.” You said, masking the fear you were feeling. 

You kept pushing and hoping he’d give in to your pleas. “God, Y/N, you’re so fucking clingy! No wonder none of us like you.” He spat back at you.

By that point, everyone was watching in anticipation to see how you’d react to your boyfriend speaking to you like that. “That’s enough, man.” Topper interjected.

His words hurt you and that was clearly evident due to the tears that welled up in your eyes. “Alright, fine. You wanna be an asshole, that’s on you.” You snapped, turning to walk away from him. “Don’t turn your back on me!” Rafe bellowed. “I should have turned my back on you months ago with all the shit you’ve put me through!” You yelled back. 

You thought he’d scoff and roll his eyes like every other argument. What you didn’t see coming was Rafe bringing his hand up as if he were going to hit you. Rather harshly by the looks of it. 

The action made you flinch as Topper moved quickly to stand in between you and Rafe, as JJ and John B pulled you away.

The realization of what Rafe could have potentially done finally hit him when he saw the look on your face as JJ had his arms wrapped around you and his face softened.

“Y/N, I-I don’t know-“ He started before you cut him off. “Fuck you, Rafe. We’re done.” You sneered, before letting JJ and Kiara take you away from the party.

Once you had left, the mood of the party died completely. People beginning to clear out and Rafe standing there, trying to understand what just happened.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Topper yelled at his friend. “Topper,” Rafe started. “That’s my sister, dude! And she loves you, would do anything for you and you were going to hit her!” Topper said. “She was good for you. And you threw her away.” He added, before walking off to clean up the mess.

Rafe stood there, not a single ounce of a solution in his brain. Topper was right. You were the best thing that happened to him and he treated you like shit. And he knew he was doing it too. It was always after his dad tore into him about something he messed up. So he didn’t believe he deserved you so he pushed you away.

Ever since he started doing drugs, he gave you every reason to leave. But you never did. Not until you thought he was actually going to physically hurt you.

Rafe would never think of laying a finger on you in a way that would hurt you. But when he was on cocaine, he wasn’t Rafe. And clearly that didn’t stop him from hurting you verbally.

The Pogues brought you to the Chateau after JJ pulled you away from your own house. You hadn’t said a word since then and it was starting to worry JJ and Sarah.

JJ had known you just as long as he had known John B and he knew you better than most. You were a Kook but long before the prejudices started, you were their best friend.

Which was why he knew that when you weren’t talking, there was too much going on in your head.

The rest of them went inside while you sat on the front porch. JJ and Sarah stopped in the doorway and looked from you to each other.

JJ slightly nodded his head before walking over to sit by you.

“You can talk about it. You know you can tell me.” He said. You let out a deep breath before resting your head on your friend’s shoulder.

“He didn’t used to be like that. He was good to me but then he started doing the drugs and it just got worse.” You started. “Do you think it’s me? And it isn’t really because of the drugs?” You added.

JJ moved so he could look at you before he spoke. “You’re my best friend, Y/N. And I can tell you that it has nothing to do with you. It’s on Rafe if he can’t see what he’s had next to him for two years.” He said.

You have him a sad smile before putting your head back on his shoulder.

—

It had been two weeks since you had broken up with Rafe. His efforts to get you to talk to him happened every day, relentlessly.

Rafe showed up to your house not knowing that you weren’t there. When the door opened, Topper saw a very distraught Rafe standing there.

“What are you doing here?” Topper asked. “I need to see Y/N.” Rafe answered. “She’s not here. She’s with Sarah and Kie.” Topper told him.

That was when Rafe had taken off the mask, taken down the facade, and let all of his emotions show.

Topper had never seen his friend in such a fragile, emotional state before. “There’s no way out of this, bro. She’s never gonna come back to me.” Rafe cried.

“You know what you need to do then? Stop doing drugs. Stay sober and never even attempt to lay a hand on her again.” Topper told him. “I need to see her. I need to know that there’s still a chance.” Rafe said.

Topper sighed before checking the time on the Rolex on his wrist. “She’ll be home in fifteen minutes. You can wait for her upstairs.” He said.

Rafe thanked Topper quickly before rushing upstairs. He entered your room and felt the difference of tone in the room. It felt sad and different and he knew that he was the reason for it.

He could easily spot out the holes on your dresser where picture frames used to be. Pictures of the two of you that you couldn’t stand to look at anymore. He noticed the top drawer was open and empty. The drawer that held a couple of his t-shirts and sweatpants for when he’d spend the night. They were now in a duffle bag on the floor. 

Another thing he noticed was the Midsummer’s dress you were supposed to wear to match him. It was placed back in the garment bag and hanging on the back of your bedroom door. Probably so your mother could take it back. 

He remembered how excited you were to wear it, you tried it on for him and modeled it for ten minutes before he convinced you to hang it back up in your closet. 

About fifteen minutes later, Rafe heard the front door open before hearing your voice call out to your brother, causing his heart to speed up.

“Topper, I’m home!” You called, as you walked up the staircase to your room. “Wait, Y/N, I need to warn you.” Topper stopped you. “About?” You questioned. “Rafe.” Topper answered.

Your face fell at his words, not needing a further explanation. “He’s here?” You asked. “Yeah. He’s in your room.” He said.

You sighed as you nodded your head curtly before continuing your trek to your room.

Opening the door, you saw Rafe seated on the edge of your bed with tears in his eyes. A photo of to two of you in his hands. It took everything you had not to just run over there and tell him everything was going to be okay.

“What are you doing here, Rafe?” You asked, keeping your composure. “I needed to see you. To apologize for-“ He stopped himself, not wanting to relive that night’s events.

“I’ve been clean since that night but I can’t do this without you. It’s so hard. I start thinking about you and then how I lost you and it makes me want to just forget about it for a while. I need your help, Y/N. Please.” He added.

You looked at him, the broken boy who sat in front of you and sighed. This was the Rafe you missed and it seems as if you were starting to get him back.

“No more drinking. And no more drugs. Rafe, what you did scared the hell out of me. I’ve never seen you like that before. Yelling at me and telling me that I’m clingy and bitchy is one thing but hitting me is unforgivable.” You spoke.

Rafe stood up and approached you feeling a sense of hope. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I will never do anything like that again, I promise. Just please forgive me. I love you.” He said.

You took a moment to process his words and to find any trace of a lie. But when you couldn’t find one, you gave in. 

“If it happens again, I’m done.” You said quietly. “It won’t. I promise.” Rafe said. You nodded your head as Rafe pulled you into him. It wasn’t until then that you had let out the sobs you were so desperately trying to keep in. 

The two of you stayed that way, holding each other and just crying for what felt like hours. 

“You’re a mess.” You laughed, wiping the tears off of his face. “Yeah, you’re one to talk.” Rafe replied. “You know that I love you, right?” He asked. You nodded your head before speaking. “I love you too.” You replied. 

[erosia-rhodes]

As much as I love binge-watching television, it's kinda fun speculating each week about what the hell is happening on WandaVision, a show that's made the brave choice to keep so much unexplained for so long. So, let me speculate:

Evan Peters is playing Peter Maximoff from the X-Men universe and not someone else in disguise.

Here's why:

Wanda has to use real people to populate her daydream If Wanda could make everything up from scratch, she wouldn't have to take a whole town hostage. She needs real people and real matter to fuel her daydream. Sparky's death showed that Wanda can't bring organic beings back from the dead, so that makes it impossible to resurrect Aaron Tayler-Johnson as Pietro. Instead, the next best thing is another speedster that could pass for Pietro, which is how Peter got plucked out of the X-Men universe. By whom? Either unconsciously by Wanda or on purpose by whoever is the secret villain of the show. Peter's real memories were blocked and new ones were implanted. I'd bet he only remembers events where Wanda was present because her magic is powering everything even if she's not totally in control. Some of her other memories might have bled through during the process, which would explain why this Pietro is somewhat aware of what's actually going on. Or X-Men Peter might be having fun with the whole thing and doesn't need as much of a shove as everyone else! He seems like a guy who would try anything once.

Out of character for the MCU, but in character for the X-Men universe Some people think Pietro is sus because he's acting out of character, but that's only true if you're comparing him to the MCU's Quicksilver. He's acting perfectly in character for Peter from the X-Men films, a twenty-something "man child" still living in his mom's basement who enjoys playing video games when he's not stealing things and pranking people like Wanda's Pietro does with his Halloween antics. X-Men Peter is also morally flexible, filling his basement with stolen TV's and Twinkies and breaking Magneto out of prison just for kicks. That's why he's not overly perturbed that Wanda is mind controlling a bunch of people. Peter's done crimes himself, and his dad is a super villain who tried to kill the president, so if he has a sister who's mind controlling a town, it just makes her fit into the family.

This place is insane, of course he has questions! Some people think Pietro was asking way too many questions, but anyone dropped into this weirdo town would have questions. The people in S.W.O.R.D. have nothing but questions! If he were the main villain in disguise, he wouldn't need to ask any questions because he'd already know how Wanda was doing things. People also thought it was suspect that Peter responded to most of Wanda's questions with questions of his own, but that was probably the writers' way of including exposition about the missing kids and what was up with Wanda's accent. We don't know if the villain can disguise themselves as someone else anyway, and if he could, wouldn't he just use the Aaron Taylor-Johnson version as his illusion? Why choose some guy no one in town recognizes?

This casting choice feels like more than just fan service I don't think Marvel would go to the trouble of casting Evan Peters in this role unless he really is the Quicksilver from the X-Men universe. Marvel has served up some good fan service over the years, but typically only when it makes sense for the story or it's been earned. I don't see any reason to use Evan Peters unless it's really X-Men Peter. If it's not him, it would be simpler to use a random person in town to play Pietro and pay the actor less. If it really is X-Men Peter, this development cracks open the multi-verse which we known is going to be explored in the next Dr. Strange movie and the next Spider-man film.

Ok, but who sent him? Probably the secret villain who is behind all this. (My money's on Nightmare.) Peter first appears when Vision is questioning Wanda about the nature of their reality. Quite a convenient way of derailing that conversation! Another theory is that Dr. Strange sent him as some sort of mole, but I don't think Pietro would have appeared when he did if that were the case. His distraction was too well timed to shut down Vision's line of questioning.

But isn't he too old to be X-Men Quicksilver? Ok, I admit, this is sort of a problem. The X-Men version of Peter was born in the 50's and the MCU is taking place slightly in the future because of the Blip. That means Peter would be well into his 60's. Does he not age at a normal rate? Are the universes slightly out of sync so the 80's are taking place in the X-Men universe at the same time the 20's are taking place in the MCU? Or did he get snatched out of time as well as location?

What's with the necklace? Pietro has been wearing the same necklace whenever he's on screen, even when it didn't match his Halloween outfit. It's like Agnes's brooch—something almost always worn, no matter the era. It might be a transformed version of his goggles or the headphones he always carries. Or perhaps it gives some sort of magical protection which allows him to realize this world is being run by Wanda? Not sure. If this ends up not being Peter, it could be something associated with whoever he really is.

If it is Peter, how will this end? It seems certain the hex has to end at some point. If Peter is still around at that time, he will be restored to his normal self, probably wearing a silver leather jacket over a t-shirt featuring a band's logo. (Twenty-One Pilots? Fall Out Boy? What modern band do you think Peter would dig?)

Most importantly, he will have created a true emotional bond with Wanda. Their relationship started out as fake, but they've spent real time together and she's opened up to him about how alone and empty she's felt, allowing herself to be vulnerable in a way she rarely has with anyone else. He also clearly loved being Uncle P, goofing around with her kids. (Please let the kids live! If they vanish with the hex, it will be heartbreaking.) Peter could be a true connection that helps bring her back to the world, particularly if he ends up retaining all the memories of Pietro and Wanda’s childhood. I don't think this is the end of their relationship. Honestly, Peter might end up thanking Wanda for all the fun he's had and ask if they can do Knight Rider or The A-Team next time. So, I see three options here:

Option 1) Peter hangs around for a bit because he's stranded in this universe and needs Wanda's help to send him back. Maybe Dr. Strange helps them with that in the next movie.

Option 2) He is able to return to his universe and invites Wanda back with him so she can avoid prison and start a new life. I mean, this woman is definitely facing charges, right? She may not have started this insanity, but she went along with it when she could have stopped it. At this point, she's the Patty Hearst of mind rape. She's either going on the run or spending a lot of time in prison or in a mental hospital.

Option 3) Peter gets expelled from this universe either by Wanda or the secret villain or someone else and never gets a chance to explain anything. This would be the least satisfying conclusion, but it's possible.

I guess we'll see what happens! I will be utterly devastated if this isn't Peter from the X-Men universe because I love all the implications of that. I'd also love to see more of Evan Peters in the MCU.

[alreadyblondenow]

When December comes | Hendery

✦ Hendery x reader x Lucas ✦ Fluff, Smut, Angst, Royalty AU, Nutcracker AU ✦ 3/5 for HOLIDAY SERIES: Once Upon A December

Summary: As an adopted legitimate princess and future queen of two kingdoms, you grew up proving yourself that you deserve the role that has given to you. Nothing is simple about being an adopted princess but being arranged to marry Prince Hendery turned your life upside down.He left you, eventually. And by the time he came back to your life, you have a loving boyfriend, and Prince Hendery…. is arranged to be married to your sister now.  

Word count: 8,690k

Warnings: adopted reader (if thats triggering at any point, please click away) A lot of smut, unprotected sex, mentions of sex, swearing, mentions of other idols, fingering, mentions of rough sex, heavy cheating, major character death

A/N: PURE FICTION. This is a love triangle fic but not much focused to Lucas, more on Hendery. Inspired by a bunch of royalty movies, especially princess diaries, Nutcracker (ballet), inspired by the song Satisfied from Hamilton. Love writing for Hendery so much. Check my recent post for Hendery’s thirst photos whahaha, as per Lucas character here idk I always see him as sweet and lovable and he always knows what to do. The guy has serious good leadership skills if you haven’t’ notice and i think its sexy. I’m glad this didnt reach to 10k bc u know me i hate my works being long af haha enjoy reading mwa!

For @jeongyoonohs​ sorry it took me so long to finish this :( But this is for you! 

OPENING

Once upon a time, in a kingdom not so far away, ruled by a king and queen who can’t have a baby no matter how many times they’ve tried. The sad news spread all over the kingdom and caused chaos everywhere mainly because they were scared for the fall of their beloved kingdom.

But the king is wise. He made an alliance with the kingdom of his truest friend and together they helped each other’s kingdom by making an agreement. “I can’t have a child, but my queen and I have decided to adopt a baby girl,” the king says to his fellow king.

“And my wife is carrying a baby boy”

“It’s settled then. My adopted daughter will be arranged with your son, and someday be married to each other” They shook hands and made the agreement official by sealing it with their signatures and royal seals in front of their queens.

The kingdom that lost their trust with their king is now calmed relieved after hearing the great news of the two kingdoms having an alliance. And to fully earned their trust again, they searched far and wide for a baby girl that will soon be the future of their kingdom.

“And that baby girl is you my darling” your grandfather finishes his bedtime story to you. Caging you in his strong arms, cradling you like you’re truly related by blood. “Grow up as a fine woman and save this kingdom” he added. You embraced your grandfather back and smiled so sweetly at him, tracing his handsome features… then you remembered.

“Tell me the story about the Nutcracker prince,” you singsong to him. He doesn’t tell you the original story, but instead, he always tells you his version and it’s always better. His embrace became tighter, then he looked at his expensive watch to check how many minutes does he have left.

“Okay. I only have a few minutes left, princess” He started by introducing the Nutcracker prince to you which is actually magical because even though you’ve heard of this so many times it never gets old and you’re always excited to hear it again.

He described the prince as a soldier like him, but a younger version he says with a giggle. And that Nutcracker slash prince slash soldier is made specifically for you so that one day, the two of you can rule two kingdoms all at once. “Why do I need a prince?” you pout, and your grandfather is startled by your question.

“Well, jeez, I don’t know. I’m sure you can still be a fine queen without a prince, right?” he says while tucking you in and preparing you for bed. “But let’s just say that princesses like you need a proper man like the Nutcracker because… grandfather will not always be by your side” of course he can’t mention death to you, no, you’re too young to know about these things. So he kissed you goodnight on your forehead and promise to see you early in the morning again.

Growing up as an adopted princess was never easy because the eyes of a judging kingdom have always been against you and your family. That’s why as you grow up, you swore to yourself that you will prove them wrong and that you are the future of this kingdom. At a very young age, you made your parents proud of your gift of leadership and continue to make them proud by doing great in school.

Until one day, the queen finally got pregnant.

The kingdom became so busy about the queen’s pregnancy and literally, every person is excited about your baby sister. You were only nine years old and you were innocent as you can be so you don’t know that the attention is slowly shifting to your baby sister. You didn’t mind of course, again, you were just a kid. But as you grew older and older you can finally foresee a life behind the shadow of your baby sister. The real princess. It’s like she took everything from you… but whenever you remember that you’re adopted, it seems like she’s just taking what’s originally hers in the first place.  

Today is your thirteenth birthday and you celebrated it with your grandfather in an amusement park. He is the only person left in your life who can see you as a rare gem and you’re thankful for him. As you walked around the busy park, with a few bodyguards on your sides, you and your grandfather laugh and laugh while you’re eating hotdogs on a stick.

“Your father told me that you refused to have a ball for your thirteenth birthday? Why?” he asked while enjoying his food.

“I’m not a real princess grandfather, I don’t deserve a ball. And besides, riding that scary rollercoaster is better than dancing with a bunch of princes whom I don’t know in the first place, and playing dress-up the whole night”

“Hmm. Don’t you say that you’re not a real princess, there was a Y/n before your baby sister. And the kingdom is still looking forward with you ruling us someday because you’re older than your sister and you’re still a legi-“

“timate daughter, I know, I understand grandfather thank you for reminding me” you wiped the ketchup on his lips and smiled at him, “What will I do without you? I hope that my Nutcracker prince is exactly like you. Wise and strong”

“Don’t worry about that darling, you’re still young, and I’m still here” he giggles and walks you towards that scary rollercoaster ride.

ACT 1

Things slowly change around the castle and you learned to distant yourself from your parents but not forgetting your duty as a first born and legitimate adopted daughter of the king and queen. And as you enter royal high school, you thought that your life will get uglier but no. Surprisingly, school made you feel alive and less of a princess and more like a future leader.

But most importantly, you finally met your Nutcracker. Prince Hendery.

Usually, prince and princesses meet for the first time during a royal ball, soiree, or a simple lunch at the palace’s garden grounds. But you and Prince Hendery, met in the school hallway for the first first time. It is as if your whole world slowed down, every student walked in slow motion while you and Hendery locked eyes on each other. And the best part is, he did not know that you’re the princess who’s meant to be forever with him.

At first, you don’t talk to each other and just simply exchange smiles and glances from time to time whenever you cross paths in the hallway, eating at the cafeteria, or ‘reading’ at the library. You thought it wasn’t fair that you know everything about him but he doesn’t even know what you look like.

“You know I’ve been flirting with this princess for months already, do you know her name?” Hendery whispers at his fellow prince, Xiaojun, and told him to take a look at where you’re seated. Xiaojun then scoffed at his friend and playfully slapped Hendery’s face knowing that he is completely clueless about who you are.

“I don’t know if you’re always going to be this dumb, you’re going to be a king someday. Anyway, that princess is Y/n. The Y/n” and that is all it takes to make Hendery realize that he has been flirting with his soulmate for weeks now.

From there on the prince has become bold with his gestures. Sitting with you during breaks, even flirting with you in front of your friends and his friends. Prince Hendery has the most beautiful smile you have ever seen, hair is black and soft and you bet it smells good either, he was tall but just right for your height. Not only he was perfectly handsome, but he is a gentleman too. In other words, everything about him screams prince charming.  

You and prince Hendery were the talk of royal school. Everyone knew about your arrangement and the alliance of your kingdoms. You even hear people talk on the hallways that you’re literally made for each other that’s why everyone envied you.

“Let’s grow up first, okay?” Hendery says, giving you a single rose during your school’s Valentine event. A simple gesture that says there's no need to rush on being in a relationship and make everything official between the two of you but also, it was a subtle move to show everyone that you already belong to each other so there should be no competition.

You fell in love with each other from a distance, not rushing through love, taking your time, and enjoying your youth because you have a lifetime together. Although, Hendery likes reminding everyone that you’re his in the most subtle way, may it be hugging you in public, kissing your cheek before you go home, and smiling your way whenever he sees you around the school.

From freshman year until your senior year, you and Hendery waited until you’re both legal of age to finally make it official. The news was all over the TV, tabloids, articles, and magazines that you’re in love with each other. It was a cute high school sweethearts story and every day was perfect.

Senior year just started and you and Hendery decided to study together but the planned study session became a make out session, giggling and cuddling in his bed while still wearing your uniforms. The prince was looking at you, admiring your pretty face touching your features softly then suddenly he noticed that he can almost see your breast. He looked away, of course. And covered his head with one of his pillows as he groans in frustration.

“What? Why?” you asked, completely clueless. He didn’t answer you, instead, he covers your exposed skin with a small pillow. “Oh shit, I’m sorry” you apologized immediately and became shy like him too.

“It’s okay. If I’m being honest I wanted to touch you but, I knew better than that. Can we promise to be each other’s first and last?”

“You mean sex?”

“Exactly, sex”

“Only if we seal it with a kiss,” you bite back in a flirty tone, looking at his pink lips that are slowly coming closer to you. When your lips touched, you returned the kiss and swing your arms around his neck, situating him accidentally in between your legs. Skirt lifted and all. Your bodies are becoming warm in an instant and you both know you need to stop before you make wrong decisions.

“How's that for a promise? Let’s get married when we grow older and have sex every day” he bit the shell of your ear, making you giggle and laugh with him. Being this horny with each other is normal, you thought. You are both young and full of passion, and it amazes you how Hendery wanted to wait until you get married and be kings and queens.

Senior year is perfect. Every day.

Until one day, Hendery’s father died and he stopped coming to school. You hear different kinds of gossip every day. 'Is he a king now? That's why he's not coming to school?', 'School is boring for king Hendery now', 'Are they gonna be married soon?', 'Are they even ready to rule yet?'. Again, you were the talk of the nation. The headline ‘Prince Hendery left Princess Y/n’ was everywhere and you can't do anything about it. You weren’t hurt that he left everything, you were more worried because maybe he’s all alone and grieving. You wanted to ask his family but you respect their privacy.

“So he just left?” you told your grandfather everything. He just came back from his cruise around the world and you’re happy to see his visible tan lines, for sure he had a great time.

“Yep, just like that grandfather,” you walk shoulder to shoulder around the palace’s garden, looking at the flowers and harvesting some fruits.

“Well, I’m sure he had his reasons. Just stretch your patience my darling, you know what they say, love is patience” he pats your hand before picking a lemon. “Enough about the prince, I heard you are making quite an impression now. The king is beyond impressed” he was talking about your win, elected student body president. Apparently, it’s a big deal for your father, because, during his stay in royal school, he was elected as president too.

“I didn’t try too much, I think I won because of my popularity and not because of my leadership skills” you once again doubted yourself but of course, your grandfather is here to straighten you up.

“Show them you’re both. Popular and a great leader”

It was always a good talk with your grandfather, but whenever you remember that Hendery is not with you anymore it automatically makes you sad. You missed him. So much.  

ACT 2

But even though you missed Hendery and it’s like he took a part of your heart and brought it with him, life goes on. You faced Senior year and showed everyone your perfect smiles like nothing is bothering you. But at night, when you’re all alone, you just can’t help but look at your pictures with Hendery on your phone and miss him.

Life goes on.

With or without your prince.

You studied day and night, kept your eyes on the prize, and busy yourself until your heart is finally healed. You waited for him of course, you waited long and hard but you can’t wait forever.

As you continue to know yourself, get involved with a lot of organizations in college, your journey has become even more thrilling when you met Lucas. He’s not royalty nor does he came from a rich family, he’s “just a man who’s brave enough to ask a princess on a date” his exact words.

Lucas is a whole new adventure to you. He’s the epitome of new things and new experiences. But your favorite thing about Lucas is, he can make you forget that you’re a princess even just for a few hours. He made you happy every day because he never forgets to tell you that being happy is the most important thing in this world. He loves you with every part of his being. And he’s ready to face your world and be with you in every step until you become queen.

“N-no I don’t want to be king. I can be your butler and still love you for all I care” he covers your naked body while you both come down from your highs. Tonight is one of those nights that you can be with Lucas without having your bodyguard. He was praising you during sex, calling you ‘princess’ or ‘my queen’ whenever he thrust and pushes you on the edge, so you asked him a stupid question if he wants to be king. “I just want to be with you, people may see me as a gold digger once the news that you have a commoner boyfriend comes out, but we both know that’s not true right?”

“Of course, not” you embraced him and apologized for the question, hiding your face on his chest. You feel his big hands caress your back to comfort you and soon plant kisses on your temple. He’s always sweet and gentle like this. If only people would see the kind of person Lucas truly is.

“But what if he comes back? What will happen to us?” he was talking about Hendery. When Lucas knew that you’re arranged to be married to Hendery, he didn’t take it lightly. He was mad but not to you. You didn’t talk for weeks and you’re both heartbroken, but Lucas realized that it's better to love you fiercely now than waste his time worrying about the future.

“I will talk to my father, don’t worry about that. Wong Yukhei don’t you trust me?” you kissed his chest to put him back in the mood and change the subject. Of course, he can’t say no to you.  

After getting your degree in college, you started working for the king and queen, spearheading foundations, and knowing the kingdoms that you’re going to rule someday. Remember when you thought your parents will forget about your existence because they had your sister? Well, that didn’t happen. Your parents were proud of everything you’ve achieved and they wanted your sister to follow in your footsteps.

Slowly, you proved to them that you don’t need a king to rule this kingdom. Introducing Lucas to your parents did not go well at first but eventually, they saw that you and Lucas are happy with each other despite having different worlds.

Still, they want to keep your relationship hidden.

It’s Christmas Eve and you’re all dressed up right now, ready to shake a lot of hands and dance with a bunch of princes and dukes and god know what else but you can’t help but take care of a few things before you enjoy this night. You were signing some last minutes contracts and reading proposals when you heard a soft knock from your door, “S-sorry. Come in” you see your boyfriend dressed up in a tux, looking so handsome. He smiled at you before he enters and closed the door behind him, “well you look dashing” you put your pen down and crossed your arms.

“I’m here to pick you up your majesty, the guests are waiting downstairs and your grandfather-“

“Oh he’s here! Perfect!” you exclaimed and express your excitement upon hearing that your grandfather is here. You haven’t seen him for a very long time and you have lots of stories to tell him. “Oh shit- by the way. Lucas, uhm… Can you zip my dress, I forgot I unzip it because it was uncomfortable. Stupid ball gowns” you said, turning your back to Lucas and waiting for him to take care of your zipper. But before he zips you up, he kisses your exposed shoulders and massaged them.

“Don’t forget to have fun tonight okay? I’ll be watching you like a hawk the whole night- well actually, not you. The men that will dance with you tonight” Because Lucas has no rank or title, he can’t earn a dance with you because it’s against the conditions that your father gave.

“All done your majesty,” he says and stepped back to open the door for you.

Every Christmas Eve, throwing an extravagant ball has been your family’s tradition for centuries. It is known by royalties across the globe and this fancy Christmas party is actually part of your kingdom’s history. Different respective kings, beautiful queens, annoying princes and princesses, dukes and duchess are invited and all are here not only to have fun but also here to talk business with you.

The night goes on, dancing with a few guests before you meet and spend some time with your grandfather. You wanted to whine and complain to your assistant but she’s just doing her job so you shrugged it off. “How many more left?” you asked while waiting for the next Prince to ask to dance, “two more your majesty. Your grandfather is next after this” you smiled and thanked her, giving a bow to the next prince who’s about to dance with you. And the moment you lift your head to meet his eyes, you thought you were dreaming.

For a moment you forgot proper princess etiquette and gave Hendery a tight hug, shocking everyone at your behavior but they’re even more shocked about Hendery’s appearance. ‘The son of the dead king has finally shown himself’ you hear everyone murmur around you but you don’t care. You smiled so big seeing that handsome face again. He kissed your hand and asked you to dance which you accepted gladly, now that Hendery is back and you’re all dressed up wearing your tiara, you feel like a real princess finally meeting his prince in a storybook.

“Where have you been?” you whispered to him.

“I’m sorry I left you like that, I was devastated” he whispers back as you two dance in the middle of the ballroom with the other royalties, trying so hard to hide the excitement. While you were dancing with Hendery, you remember that handsome smile that made your knees weak, his sweet gestures to prove his feelings for you, and your promises to each other.

Is it really true that first love never dies or your love for Hendery was just too strong that it never died?

When Hendery was about to hand you over to your grandfather, your father and mother came out of nowhere with your younger sister on their side. Is it because they’re happy to see Hendery too? Or are they going to press you regarding the arranged marriage again? You cling to your grandfather as you get nervous but careful not to show it. “Ah! Hendery welcome back! How was your time in the army, good?” your father exclaims. So all this time he knew where Hendery is.

“I had a hard time your highness, but I made it back in one piece” Hendery answered and made a small joke that made you all giggle and let out a small laugh. Oh you missed him.

“Hendery, I want you to meet Y/n’s younger sister” you watch him kiss your sister’s hand, “and also your future bride to be”

You were completely taken aback by what you just heard and the words that came into your head were, ‘I thought you were mine’ but you didn’t speak your mind and listened further to what your father is saying. But as you listen more, you feel like your dress was becoming tighter and tighter in every second that you can’t breathe anymore. “She will be your queen in your kingdom, and Y/n will be an independent queen here” your father explained proudly.

“But she’s too young” you pointed at your sister but you see how your sister’s eyes are sparkling. Too late. You thought. You watch her be charmed by Hendery’s visuals, that damn smile captured your sister’s heart in an instant.

“Hendery can wait until his bride is in the right age to be married, right son?”

“Of course your highness, it’s my duty” he answered confidently.

After the unexpected talk, you excused yourself, went to your room, and breathed outside on your balcony. You can’t forget your sister’s face as she looks at the man you used to kiss and you used to love. She has no idea what controversy she will face in the future, she is so young and blinded by infatuation…Or maybe you’re being like this because you’re jealous.

“Believe me I’m just as shock as you are”

A familiar voice made your heart race and your body stiffen in no time. You turned around secretly hoped that you’re wrong, but you will never forget his voice and also how his mere presence makes your heart excited. “How did you get in here?”

You hear him scoff and stood behind you, “We used to make out a lot in your room-and mine too of course. I still remember the way to your room by heart” he looked up the stars to stop himself from looking at you. You looked so beautiful tonight that he can’t stop blushing and admiring you.

You were silent. Mainly because you don’t know what to say and you’re not sure what to feel either.

“It’s going to be fine” with all his courage he tried hugging you like how he used to when you were only teenagers. But you pushed him away and stepped away from him. Hendery felt a slight pang in his heart, he never thought that you could do that to him.

“Were not together now don’t you get it? You were gone for years Hendery, a lot has changed”

“You’re hurting me, this is not our fault we love each other what's wrong with that” he reasons out, trying to lower his voice because someone might hear him.

“Loved. Past tense. My sister likes you and you are arranged to be married to her Hendery” you close your eyes as you remember what happened again earlier.  

“If I have known that life will take you away from me, I shouldn’t have wasted my time and showered you with love and affection when we were young”

With a heavy heart, your first love left you in the cold night with a confused mind.

ACT 3

To make it up with your grandfather, you spend Christmas morning with him while drinking tea by the palace garden and telling him numerous stories about Lucas…and also your talk about Hendery last night.

“Don’t do something stupid that your future self with regret” he says, stirring his coffee and chewing his bread with jam. He was talking about cheating, he didn’t tell you exactly but you get it. “Did you tell your boyfriend already about what you felt upon hearing your sister’s engagement?” You shook your head and see your grandfather get disappointed but he understands that everything that’s happening now is not easy for you.

“He’s away, for now, left first thing in the morning to go to Hong Kong for his family” you felt hopeless again.

“Oh everything will be fine. I’m sure he will understand, that man is wise. I’m rooting for him” he says like Lucas is his son.

“What- really not Hendery?” you let out a laugh because your grandfather is cute.

“Nope. Now, don’t ask me why. Figure it out yourself” he winks and continues to eat his breakfast.

As days go by without Lucas, you and Hendery continue to meet each other accidentally whenever he visits your sister. You’re a busy woman, but your mind seems to have time to think whether they kissed already, hold hands, or admitted their feelings to each other if there's any.

You saw flowers on your way to your office and you thought that maybe it's for your sister, from Hendery and you can’t help but to get envious and jealous. He used to give you flowers back when you were in high school and now… he’s doing it to your sister too.

While you were reviewing proposals, you got a phone call from your personal phone and it's Lucas which you’re very excited to answer. “Hey” you singsong, putting the phone between your ear and neck while you continue to scan through papers.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch, everything okay back there?”

No. You wanted to tell him that you’ve been having these weird feelings towards Hendery. “No, baby. Everything’s fine, I’m working now… As usual- how's everyone there?”

“They miss you. They wanted you to visit next year” he says, breathing deeply before he continues. “Listen, I want to stay here for a little longer. I miss them too you know-“

“And it’s fine! Baby, I understand. You’ve done so much for me already, go and be with your family” you felt guilty for caging Lucas in your country. Even though he’s the one who wanted to stay here, still. You can feel that he’s homesick sometimes.

After working in your office, you went straight to your room and purposely skipped dinner because you knew that Hendery is still here. When you opened your door, the same flowers that you thought Hendery gave to your sister is sitting on your coffee table with a small envelope that has your name on it.

Dear Y/n,

Back when we were in high school, I gave you a single rose for Valentine's day and I told you, “Let’s grow up first”

Now that we're all grown up, and still obviously madly in love with each other, I will not hold myself back from loving you. Not anymore.

I’m sorry for leaving, please give me a chance and meet me at the back of the palace at midnight. I’ll be waiting.

H.

Bold of him to think that you’re still madly in love with him. How can he say that?

You look at the letter as you grow weak and let yourself flop on your couch, face first and still undecided if you’re going. Frustrated and guilty, that’s what you’re feeling ring now. Frustrated because you don’t know what to follow, your heart or your mind. Guilty because your heart says you should go.

At the end of the day, you find yourself walking in the dark on your way to the back of the castle to meet Hendery. Hugging yourself as you cling more in your thin cardigan, trying to keep yourself warm as you feel your heartbeat faster by every second you come closer to the meeting spot. You see Hendery at the back of a thick tree, face illuminated because of his phone screen. “Oh you’re here. Sorry I was about to ring your phone” he admitted.

“Why am I here? What do you want?” You asked in the softest way possible. He saw that you’re shivering and invited you to go around the tree. There you see a blanket and small pillows and the lake was perfectly lit by the moon. What a beautiful view. And while you were admiring the view, you feel him place his jacket around you and motions you to sit on the ground with him.

“Please for once let’s pretend I didn’t leave you. I didn’t want my father to die, I didn’t expect our kingdom to suffer. And you’re the only good thing that’s left to me. So please”

You looked at him for a second that soon turned into minutes. You bit your lower lip and you remember that you weren’t mad at him for leaving, so why are you mad at him now?

Slowly, you accepted the warmth that he offered and sat close to him, sharing the blanket and keeping you close. “You’re here to hear me apologize sincerely” he gulps before he starts talking and explaining why he left, looking into your eyes so you know he’s telling you the truth. He told you that his father’s last will is for him to join the army and to be a soldier because in his father’s eyes he’s not yet ready to be a young king so he didn’t have a choice but to leave.

You were heartbroken while hearing his part. “I was never mad at you for leaving. I was worried about you”

He smiled sweetly at you. The kind of smile that makes your body warm and heart flutter, he pulled you close and you let him. “I know. Mother told me you were looking for me, but she can’t tell you anything. I told her I’m the one who should tell you someday. I’m sorry” he embraced you tightly, his cheeks resting on your shoulders. And right then and there everything is clear to you. You still have feelings for him.

“What are we gonna do now? My sister, Lucas” you asked him as you rake away strands of hair from his face.

“I’m not in love with your sister” he admitted without hesitation.

“But I love Lucas” there’s that guilty feeling again. You feel your heart breaking for Lucas, he doesn’t deserve being cheated on like this.

“I thought you were mine” he whispers. And even if it's a whisper the hurt was obvious from the sound of his voice. He didn’t see it coming. He didn’t think that this will be more complicated than he imagined.

“Funny. I thought the same thing when my father told us you're enggaged to my sister” you admitted and scoffed.

“Give me a chance to win you back. And if you're not coming back to me, just let me be with you for a little longer. I beg you”

There was a moment of silence and Hendery understands that you needed that silence to think, “Okay” you said. And saying ‘okay’ never felt so wrong. You cupped his face and tried to turn this moment around, “what's it like to be away from home?”

“Sad. I think of you every day and of course my family but they get to see me but you... not even a picture just our memories in my head”

Now that Hendery is a prince slash soldier, you remember the Nutcracker story your grandfather used to tell you for bedtime. That’s when you realized that you and Hendery are truly made for each other.

But you have Lucas...

As your night with Hendery continues and makes up for lost time, the emotional reunion turned to giggles and laughs when your time together has ended. He invited you over to his own house for a date since he can’t take you out like he used to, and reminded you that you gave him a chance to win you back, and thanked you.

On the next day, your mind was blanked. You can’t believe that you’re cheating on Lucas and have been refusing to answer his calls.

Days went on like this until you’re not awkward with Hendery anymore and you’re comfortable again around him. He showered you with love, you accept it wholeheartedly. Every day was sweet with Hendery even though you’re both aware of the future consequences but no one seems to care for now.

You go to his place and spend time with each other, whether talking the whole night and telling each other stories, him making you giggle and laugh with your legs on top of his thighs while you both sit on his couch enjoying a glass of wine or whenever you’re busy reading something or you brought a little work at his place and he can easily take your stress away by making you laugh.

Today, you came early and decided to cook for him and have dinner together. You don’t know but Hendery is leaning on the door frame of his kitchen with a flower in his hand, watching you chop some peppers in his kitchen. He felt like he finally won you back. Just seeing you hum while you prepare dinner makes his heart so happy. He then walked slowly and hugged you from behind, resting chin at the top of your shoulders, and showed you the flowers he has for you.

You smiled so big, dropping the knife on the chopping board and turning around to give him a kiss.

That’s your first kiss again.

He was shocked but you did it again. You realized he was trying so hard that he’s slowly being successful in winning you back and you’re actually scared of the future but he makes you happy.

“What? It’s not like we haven’t kissed before” you touched his lips and felt his embrace tightens every second. “Dinner in 30 minutes” you smiled and went back to finish chopping the peppers and finding a nice vase for the flowers he gave.

After dinner, a few glasses of wine, cheese, and grapes, you and Hendery are buzzed and talking about work as prince and princesses while enjoying the view from his couch. The lights are turned down low and you didn’t even notice at first but the mood has been making you horny even though your topic was stressful and your minds are clouded with alcohol. You don’t know what came into your head but you sat on his lap with lidded eyes, touching his body feeling his hard rocked abs through his white dress shirt.

He giggles and laughed at you. He’s so fucking handsome when he does that. “Seriously you have to stop you will embarrass yourself in the next morning,” he told you to stop but he fixed the way he sits and made sure you were comfortable on top of him. He teased you more, smiling so handsomely and making your heart flutter.

“I'm not that drunk just buzzed. Want me to prove it?” You challenged with a flirty tone that turns him on.

“Mhmm. Okay,” he tilts his head and waited for this proof you were saying.

“I still remember how we sealed our promises with a kiss. Like that day when we promised to be each other’s first and last” your fingers went up to his hair, ruffling his soft black hair and massaging his scalp.

You don’t know what happened but the mood changes and he’s avoiding your eyes. ”I’m sorry,” he says.

“No no don’t be, you’re here now make it up to me” you kissed his neck while he gets drunk even more because of your kisses. Your hands are placed on his neck like you’re telling him you still belong to each other, rolling your hips slowly to make him horny as much as you are.

“Did you have sex with anyone already?” his question made you stop what you’re doing to him and pulling away from the kiss to look at him, you thought he didn’t like what’s happening. But to your surprise his lips went to your neck, kissing you softly but full of lust. You feel his warm tongue just below your jaw and it felt great.

“Lucas, how about you?” You moaned out, shamefully.

Usually, his heart will hurt whenever you mention Lucas, but he’s the one kissing you now. So instead of getting hurt, he smirked. “A couple of girls. Life can be stressful I need an adult stress release. Any kinks?”

“Not that I know of? You?”

He stopped and looked at you to tell you the story. “Well remember when we were making out and I accidentally saw your breasts?” you nod at him, “I think I developed some kind of breast kink and I always imagine that I’m having sex with you instead of a stranger” he admitted and looked at you clothed breast right now. “That's how much I miss you” he placed a gentle kiss on your lips and went back to leaning comfortably on the couch. He got shy but he can’t stop looking at you.

To be honest your heart swells knowing that he desperately wants you like that. As quickly as you can, you untuck your blouse and removed it in front of the prince. “You can experience the real thing tonight “ you intertwine your hand with his and slowly placed it on your breast.

Breathing heavily. Both of you. You’re like teenagers who are just about to have sex for the first time.

He sat up to meet your lips and kiss you the way you deserved to be kissed, slowly you feel his hand travel to your back to unclasp your bra. You removed and fed his lust, revealing your breast to him for the first time. Hendery was so nervous that his hands are shaking when he removed strands of hair away from your face and held you on your shoulders, slowly he lowered your body on his and started kissing your collar bones and chest before he proceeds to your breast.

It was quiet and all he can hear is your moans and the sound of his wet kisses. You wanted to tell him that his lips feel great against your skin, and simply tell him to fuck you already. When his mouth finally reached your hard nipples and bit them softly, you parted your lips and your arms swings around him and push his head to your breast even more. You noticed he knows how to use his tongue, you figured he has been doing this to someone else for years and years while the whole truth is he always wanted to do it to you. The way he flicked his tongue brings you back to reality and when he sucks your nipples good your grip on his hair tightens and when that happens he bites your nipples again to make you shiver. This man is good.  

He placed his hands just below your boob area to hold you still while he does whatever he wants to your breast. Sucking, pinching, bitting, and kneading. Everything felt good and your moans are good proof. With his strength, he got up from the couch and carried you to his room while you kiss with lust. He lay you down on his king-sized bed and kissed your body down while unbuttoning your pants and pulling them down until you’re only wearing your panties. Hendery then unbuttoned his dress shirt in between your spread legs, kneeling in front of you, stripping until he’s only wearing his boxers briefs. He situates his body on top of you grinding on your clothed private parts, hands all over each other’s body. He then went back to kissing your nipples and sucking them but little did you know Hendery is just distracting you while his hands are slowly coming down inside your panties.

With a great shock, you closed your eyes and parted your lips as you feel Hendery’s cold fingers slide up and down on your wet slit while his mouth is still sucking your nipples. It was a whirlwind of feelings, everything felt good, and seeing Hendery enjoy turns you on too. By the time you had your first orgasm, shaking and body so sensitive with swollen nipples, Hendery was kissing you softly and asking you in the most innocent way if you’re okay. The sound of his giggles makes you calm, the way he whispers soft praises beside your ear while his hands roam freely around your body. Truth is he’s genuinely happy right at this moment because he doesn’t need to imagine anymore.

He went back to kissing your body down until he reaches your wet core and licks it up and down for a while before he lines his cock. In between your widely spread legs, you watch Hendery lick you good and feel him moan from time to time. “Hendery” you called him, kneeling in between your legs in an instant, flashing his beautiful body to you. His skin is flawless, strong arms, perfect abs, and of course, fucking beautiful smile. Everything about him makes you weak right now that you just opened your legs, reach for hard cock, and line it to your entrance yourself. “Woah” he giggled and stopped you, “Okay calm down, I’ll fuck you good I promise” he pumped his cock in front of you and lines it immediately just how you want it and slowly enters you. He wasn’t big like Lucas but he kept his promise, he fucked you good.

So good that you asked for more as you grip his Egyptian cotton sheets and let your body be dragged with every hard thrust he give you.

So good that you asked him to go slower because you don’t want it to end yet.

So good that you asked him to cum inside you and asked for another round.

On your third orgasm, your hole is dripping with mixes of your cum and Hendery’s while the handsome prince is kissing your neck as you come down from your high. “I love you” he whispers but he was too late, you were sleeping soundly already, arms wrapped around his neck. He smiled and kissed you one last time before he pulls out and cleans you up.

He didn’t sleep that night, he just watched you sleep beside him. Let you cling to him in the middle of the night, watch you roll in his bed and expose your body, but of course, he’s quick to cover you again. And when the time comes, he wakes you with kisses on your shoulders, embracing you tightly and kissing you more.

“Wake up” you hear him whisper and you try to open your eyes the moment he told you so. You see his window, it was still dark so you closed your eyes again. “Want to watch the sunrise with me? You’re going to love it” he went down from his bed and opened his curtains so you can have a full view of the sky while you enjoy your comfort in his bed. You sat up and waited for him to join you again and stay warm together. Slowly, you see how the sky became pitch black to deep blue to light blue until you can see the pretty view outside his house. It was calming. He was holding your hand the whole time.

After watching the sunrise with him he fell asleep while holding your hand and you think he’s cute for having a tight grip even though he’s sleeping. While he was sleeping, it’s now your turn to admire his handsome features and watch him sleep before you start your day and make breakfast.

You hate to admit it but it looks like he has completely won you over.

“You look good in my dress shirt” he greets you good morning and kissed you on your temple while you set the table. You feel his hands in your hips, slowly coming down to your butt, and realized that you’re only wearing his dress shirt and thin panties. He still can’t believe that this is all happening, “are you real?” He whispers.

“Yes. Now come on, I have a meeting with the parliament. Need to go home and get ready” you eat some fruits as you scan your schedule for the day and there you see it and completely missed it.

Lucas went home last night. And you left your personal phone in your car. Fuck you said to yourself but didn’t show it to Hendery.

Leaving this morning became harder than you expected and you spent a total of 20 minutes kissing and flirting with Hendery before you finally open the door.

You went on with your day and made an excuse to Lucas as to why you didn’t pick him up at the airport last night. You were at your office with stacks and stacks of paper works and you weren’t even acting stressed when he came in because you were indeed stressed with everything.

“Oh baby, I’m really sorry” you greet him with a kiss and left everything on your desk. Lucas saw how stressed you are so he understood immediately and didn’t even bother asking. “You’re coming home to me tonight right? I missed you” he added and pouted like the big baby that he is.

“Uh-huh. Of course yes, I’m all yours” you smiled and he hugged you so tight before he leaves you to work again.

“Of course. You’re always mine” he said and kissed you goodbye.

The nights are cold for Hendery when Lucas got back because he can’t get a hold of you. No text, no call, no email. No nothing. And once again, he was heartbroken and he felt like he’s losing you again.

When he visited your sister a week since the last time he saw you, Hendery saw you with Lucas and didn’t even think of taking another glance. He had all these emotions ball up in his chest and he needed to release them.

“Hey, I didn’t know you were visiting today” your sister was surprised and invited him into her room. When she turned your back at him, he saw your figure in your sister. He’s back to imagining girls to be you, he’s back to that sick habit of his. But he can't help it. Effortlessly, he flirted with your sister, and surprisingly your sister was horny. Very horny for Hendery. One thing led to another and the next thing he knows he’s fucking her hard from behind kissing her shoulders and imagining that it’s you.

“What’s that noise” you murmur to Lucas while you were having a nap with him. Lucas giggled and whispered back, “I think Prince Hendery paid her a visit and... you know...” he was giggling and keeping you close to him as he went back to his nap, completely clueless that you’re hurting.

Everything that you and Hendery built from the past few days falls down when you came to his house and had your first fight.

ACT 4

“You didn’t call! Or texted that he’s already back you just left me hanging!”

“And that’s a good reason to fuck my sister?”

“It just happened!”

“Bullshit!” You shouted back. Louder than before, completely overpowering his shouts. With all his bravery, he got you a glass of water, came closer to you, and caressed your shoulders to keep you calm.

“I fucked up and I’m sorry, please,” he says sincerely.

Then you realized something.

“You don’t have to say sorry to me. It’s okay if you and my sister fucked because someday you will be married to each other. Were the ones cheating”

He listened to every word you said and begged you to take it back because he’s losing you again. When you finally said, “let’s end this Hendery. Do you want to have more fights like this in the future? What will you feel if I tell you that me and Lucas fucked last night-“

It was like thunder, disturbing the silence of his quiet house when he grabbed the glass of water and threw it in one corner.

“Exactly my point. We don’t belong to each other anymore. I’m sorry”

“Y/n. Please-“ he begged once again but you just repeated everything you said and left him.

The end.

It was the end of your story with Hendery.

But just as you thought that you’re done handling one heartbreak for the day, you’re wrong. Lucas called to tell you the news that your grandfather had a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital.

After everything that happened on that day, you never made peace with Hendery and never talked to him again. Lucas saw you at your lowest and took care of you every day after the funeral and never left your side.

Months passed by quickly and Hendery is staying in your palace as per your sister’s request and continue to ignore each other for safety. Sometimes you greet each other for formality but never as friends and as past lovers. Lucas is not stupid to not see what’s happening.

Two months before your coronation day, you were sitting on your throne with your leg up and pouting as you’re thinking if you’re really ready to be a queen. You see Lucas enter the hall but you did not move an inch. He sat on the cold floor in front of you, reaching for your hand and kiss it.

“I miss him, I wish he could see me as a queen” tears started to fall but Lucas is quick to dry them.

“He saw you as a queen already even when you were only a little girl” you understand what he said and you’re thankful for him for not leaving you at your lowest and choosing to be with you even though he found out about you and Hendery. “So... I wanted to do this, while you’re still you. And not...the queen” he says awkwardly and pulls out a small red velvet box.

But you sit properly and stopped him from opening it and saying the question that will change your life, “how can you stay to a woman who cheats?”

“Your grandfather told me love is patient. I had a meaningful talk with him, you’re right he’s wise. He told me you love me and he said if one day you do something stupid and wrong, which turns out you did... He told me ‘check your heart if you still love her, and if you still do marry her and don’t ever let her go again’"

Tears started to fall from your eyes again. “So will you marry me Y/n. Let me be the one to dry your tears forever?” He let out an awkward laugh, nervous about the next thing that will come out of your mouth.

“Yes, of course, yes” you cup his face, and this time you’re the one to dry his tears away.

Little did you know that Hendery heard everything. And he is beyond heartbroken.

[twstheadcanons]

This is a lore question and a slightly specific one. Cater as a character and otherwise is super interesting to me but at the same time insanely confusing. While at first I thought he would end up having maybe slightly abusive family there's a possibility that's not the case. His sister's seem to enjoy dolling him up and his mother seems to go along with it and his father's a bit more absent. I think I would mainly like to know what his true self is truly reflecting and also if Trey seems to know about this 'true version'. Don't feel pressured to anwser this if you can't btw ❣️

Cater fans come get yall’s food.

S, iideally I’d go through events Cater’s prominent in (Beans Day, Halloween), but that would just make this whole post longer.  So I’ll be using Cater’s card stories for now.  What we know about Cater, on the surface level, is that he comes across as happy-go-lucky, energetic, social, trendy, superficial, flaky, and insensitive at times.  But that’s Cater on a surface level.

So for Cater, his major issues from his background are:

his family frequently moving to accommodate his father’s occupation as a banker

his sisters dragging him into their own interests that he was expected to accommodate as well

Cater repeatedly states he disliked getting dragged around by his sisters and having cutesy stuff he wasn’t genuinely interested in shoved into his face.  This would even happen on his birthday, where his sisters got him things they’re more likely to enjoy, which made Cater feel frustrated since he was supposed to be the focus on his own birthday.  But despite that annoyance, Cater understands his sisters didn’t really mean any harm.  From the sounds of it, they liked hanging out with Cater, and assumed that Cater enjoyed how they spent time together as well since Cater preferred to go with the flow, rather than rock the boat.  

In his Bday SSR, Cater mentions that his sisters became more considerate of his own interests and asked him what he wanted.  All three coming from a family where they move and lose close friends a lot, the sisters are probably close and want to stay close to their brother as well, since they’re the only consistent company in a similar age range.  His sisters are each other’s best friends, Cater didn’t have that growing up.  He also mentions his sisters and mother’s sweets-making kick, and how he eventually got over having sweets every day.  But when he protested, it’d disappoint and sadden them/they’d have dejected looks on their faces, which Cater didn’t know how to handle, so he made himself go along with their whims to keep them happy.  

This pours into his social media life, where he’s a peppy, cheery guy that posts upbeat content and responds with light, casual, carefree messages to people.  His Lab SR literally has him state that he ‘should always be happy and excited, after all’.  So, clearly, whatever dynamic the Diamond family has, while not what I’d call something as heavy as abuse, isn’t considerate of Cater’s feelings and views Cater’s ‘go with the flow’ ways as approval.  If he ‘breaks character’ of the devil-may-care person he is on the surface, it raises questions, and Cater would rather just avoid all that and enjoy himself instead of getting involved in anything heavy.

Again, Cater doesn’t like to rock the boat.  He also mentions in his Lab SR that this obsession with cutesy stuff became rather invasive, and he’d even be criticised or second-guessed if he didn’t go along with the idea.  Cater ends up accommodating that interest to prevent any debate, even if he didn’t actually care for them.  That said, with such an emphasis on aesthetics being the way he grew up, Cater has a good understanding and practical knowledge of decour and eye-catching designs, which makes him helpful and invaluable when the time calls for decour.  This is something Cater knows he’s good at, and enjoys showing off since the focus is on himself and he’s acknowledged for his skills.

With their family moving all the time, Caters gained and lost friends a lot.  Cater has an outgoing personality, at this point, it’s safe to assume he’s an extrovert, so making friends comes naturally to him.  But when you’re moving a lot, maybe sometimes in the middle of a school term, .  Cater needs engagement and social interaction, but at this point in his life, he’s tired of trying to keep up with old and new friends on deep levels, hence his interest and obsession with social media.

One thing to note about Cater: he likes cutting corners.  a lot.

In his R card “Portrait of Rosalia”, it’s understood that Cater being nice to Rosalia by throwing her a party with some lively students around is a way for him to get on her good side, because Rosalia overhears the teachers’ discussions of tests and future lessons so that he wouldn’t have to study for an upcoming history test: while Cater’s idea of a party to lift Rosalia’s spirits is in good nature, he wants something out of it that benefits him.  But while disappointed the plan didn’t work, he’s quick to brush it off, and Rosalia’s anger, by mentioning that she’s cuter when uptight anyway.

In his PE card “This betrayer!” Cater only have five laps left to do in PE.  But he hates how sweaty he is and how tedious the overall task is.  So he uses his UM to try and avoid doing all five laps himself.  Riddle catches him red-handed, and Cater tries - albeit I’m sure he knows it’s a lost cause - to flatter Riddle at the last minute.  Trey’s also involved, and despite leaving Cater in the dust, Trey also returns with Riddle, because Trey knows that Cater’s the type that tries to cut corners whenever possible, something against the rules in Heartslabyul.  Honestly, as far as Trey goes, Trey’s someone used to the way Riddle holds himself back.  Cater’s exterior personality wouldn’t be hard for Trey to recognise as Cater pushing himself or exaggerating points of his personality just to keep up an image. especially after being in the same dorm for three years.

In short, while he isn’t malicious about majority of the time, Cater will use others to get out situations and tasks he wants no part of.  This is a huge thing reflected in his UM, as it allows Cater to be in more than one place, so that he personally doesn’t have to be involved.  Growing up with two pushy older sisters, it makes he develops a UM that complements a need for escape when pure wit won’t work.  And despite being someone with a superficial interest in trends, that experience accumulates in him understanding the basics about social media and how it affects others, himself included, since it became the only way he could stay in contact with acquaintances and ‘friends’ from previous years. 

 Cater has a good understanding of how people, in general, work, especially those in his agegroup, which makes him rather crafty when he wants to string others along and get out of a situation.  This doesn’t make Cater a mean or conniving person, and in fact, he’s generally amicable and social.  Cater lives by a pretty ‘live in the moment’ credo.  He enjoys having fun and not getting overly serious about issues when he can help it.  There are instances where he doesn’t care about the situation he’s in, or thinks it’s lame/boring, but he tries to make the most of it as something to post about on MagiCam later to engage in low-effort social interaction for a mental break. 

Cater pretty much states this in his Halloween SSR:

“If I left there, they remained there. That’s why I’d rather have a casual and happy time with everyone instead of going steady. It’s like a circus troupe, you know, having fun hanging with people all over the world and then leaving. And that’s why MagiCam is the best. I suddenly got messages from acquaintances from the school I went to 3 years ago. Aren’t my casual and light relationships multiplying? It’s lovely! “

Social media helps him keep in contact with people on a low-effort level, so the risk of moving doesn’t damage his relationships online like it would physical friendships.  As for family, Cater’s feelings towards his family are difficult, tricky ones he has problems with.  He certainly doesn’t hate them, but their lifestyle, the moving and pushy personalities, don’t mesh well with Cater’s personality overall.  When Lilia tries to relate to Cater’s experiences of fleeting relationships, Cater can’t help but dismiss Lilia’s empathy as surface-level, since, to CATER’S knowledge (it’s not like he knows Lilia’s old as shit), Lilia’s always lived in the VoT with his own family and friends, which hits a sore spot with Cater:

““Cater: ….Family…huh.

Flashback Lilia: I feel like I understand you. But it is just as Cater says, it might be the truth that you should not attach yourself too much to one person in particular.

Flashback ends Cater: (That was full of lies. For a guy who grew up in the same place and never had to deal with rebuilding relations over and over… He wouldn’t understand my worthless and meaningless feelings.)

/Notification

Cater: Hello, Trey. What’s up? Huh? Are we doing our rehearsal for our night show at the stamp rally now? And is Deuce from my committee lacking in hands, so Ace is helping him out? Darn, Ace is definitely going to use this to ask me for a favor later!

Cater: Argh! And is Riddle on the verge of a rampage? I’ll be back soon, Trey, please calm him! It was such a pain getting involved in the biggest crisis of this Halloween week! No, for real! I’m not lying. That’s why you don’t have to say such cold things to me, kay? URGH, TREY, YOU’RE SO CRUEL!!

Cater: Now that Diasomnia’s turmoil has settled, it’s time to change the mood. No matter how you slice it, we’ll still separate if we become 4th years… It would be different if I repeated a year though. Anyway, I should just enjoy the memories I’m making “now”! I’ll surprise everyone with this charming skeleton costume! I’ll show them my serious side!”

Cater calls his own feelings ‘worthless and meaningless’, which likely ties into how he got dragged into his mother and sisters’ own interests over his own, and sometimes even criticised if he didn’t go with their flow.  He also expects the friendships he’s made in NRC (as we see with him talking to Trey about the rest of the Heartslabyul cast), to inevitably disappear after he and Trey are fourth years with their own internships and lives to live.  Because to Cater, the future of his life and relationships appear disruptive and inconsistent, so instead of fretting about them, he wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing at all times, hence why he cuts corners to make things easier on himself.  This is why he can come across as superficial and easy to get along with, because he doesn’t want to fret over the details.

unrelated but we’re team ‘former dorm leader cater’ here because him doing it because it sounds cool and fun fits perfectly with his personality

[zuko-always-lies]

Why Azula Staying a Villain Will Only Lead To Bad Stories Part 2: Negative Effects on Other Characters, World Building, Lore, and Thematic Expression[Submitted by justanotherthrowaway1950]

Part 1 Link: https://zuko-always-lies.tumblr.com/post/662081384160067584/why-azula-staying-a-villain-will-only-lead-to-bad#notes

I know already in part 1 how I briefly mentioned how keeping Azula a villain causes everyone to start acting stupid and incompetent (and thus denigrating them and their arcs/character growth) whenever Azula is involved so Azula can remain a credible threat despite The Gaang all being masters in their respective fields and having the resources of several nation-states at their beck and call plus a PMC (The White Lotus).

But I understand that I didn’t go into details and so my analysis was lackluster at best and very controversial at worse. So I am going to go into detail based on importance and with that said here I go.

Zuko (The Search)

Realistically, other than some minor complaints most people agree that TV!Zuko’s arc is one of the greatest in Western Animation. For the tale of someone who had at times almost given into his abuse and conditioning but, with the help of loving Uncle, his travels, and mercy/compassion showed to him by his enemies/future friends, he had managed to overcome it and start the journey of not only becoming a better person, but also help his country heal after several decades of propaganda and brainwashing.

And part of said arc is what he comes to realize about Azula: that she is not worth emulating; that she is abusive to him and the people he cares about like Mai and Ty Lee; and that she (a genocidal authoritarian colonizer) needs to be stopped and locked up by any means, even if it hurts him. For it is the only way that the world and his country can achieve peace and balance once again…that is until Azula starts showing signs that either she has realized the error of her ways or that she wants to take a new path, but needs help finding it.

But, in an effort to allow Azula to become a villain again, Bryke has Zuko engage in several actions that not only betray his character growth, but worse, aren’t really explained and negatively reflect on him.

Like, during that conference concerning Yu Dao where Zuko “realizes” that the sorry state of his nuclear family negatively reflects on him, why would Zuko care suddenly about what his subjects think of him? 

Did Zuko forget that basically he not only betrayed his nation and caused them to lose a war they had already won, but is also forcing them to pay reparations (as is said in North & South)? 

And that he is going to remain a pariah in his subject’s eyes until he manages to undo the decades of brainwashing considering his only real allies are foreigners, Iroh (who is just as much of a traitor in the FN’s eyes as Zuko), and Mai (who committed treason that led to the FN’s lost) & Ty Lee (who did commit a less extreme version of treason but immediately post-war left to join a foregin military/PMC, which would look suspect in the populance’s eyes)?

But things really start to go sideways when he goes to Azula’s asylum to get Azula to extract intel from Ozai about Ursa, allows the two to talk alone, and foolishly wheels Azula alone while promising to move her back into the palace.

Like when he went to the asylum, how come he didn’t ask them about Azula’s treatment and whether it was safe to take her out to see Ozai (her abuser and co-conspirator), let alone take her back to the palace? Maybe he would have found out she was being abused in the asylum and he could have done something about it so Azula and her fellow inmates could be treated better.

But maybe not considering it is Azula and she deserves to be abused for making Zuko’s life hard from the moment she was born.

Like why would he allow Azula and Ozai to talk alone considering their conniving natures and the fact that they are the two biggest threats to his regime (at least politically)?

Why would he wheel Azula alone, especially after Ty Lee told him that the chi-blocking is wearing off? For I know this depends on how much Ty Lee knows about chi-blocking and its effects (I’ll talk about this more in Ty Lee’s section), but Azula has already shown that she is still hostile/violent towards Zuko. That in combination with her previous showings of being able to escape nearly any situation she finds herself in should have made Zuko wary of being alone with Azula when the chi-blocking wears off instead of trying to have a soft brother-sister moment.

And then that whole sequence where Azula breaks free, and manages to burn every single letter in Ozai’s chest, save for the “Zuko is Ikem’s bastard” letter before blackmailing him into going on the search free, unbound, and with dignity. *Sigh*

Like why would Zuko shoot a fireball of the perfect size and speed that would allow Azula to break free of the chains on her legs instead of, I don’t know, calling the rest of his elite guard to subdue Azula? Especially after she has managed to bullshit instant lighting out of nowhere and thus has tricks that Zuko does not know about?

After Zuko had caught up to her and found out that she had supposedly burned every single letter and tried blackmailing him into going on the search for Ursa free and unbound, how come Zuko didn’t pat her down? For even if he had no way of knowing that she had that “bastard” letter, wouldn’t it be wise to check if she hid any letter on her body? 

I mean this is one of the most trickiest characters in the franchise so why not be extra cautious?

And the whole blackmail situation? Look I understand why Zuko agreed to Azula’s terms for who doesn’t want to find out what happened to their beloved mother? But doesn’t Zuko have a responsibility and duty to the world and his subjects to make sure that Azula remains in jail until she at least tries to reform herself? 

I know this sounds callous, but the moment Azula tried blackmailing him, he should have told her that finding Ursa was not worth letting Azula free and should have jailed her again. For why run the risk that Azula could do something horrible or escape? I mean what could go wrong if she escaped…?

Also, even if she had to be free, unbound, and travel with dignity, why didn’t Zuko have a small platoon with him? For even if he did have The Avatar and the world’s greatest waterbender by his side, shouldn’t Zuko have taken precautions in the event that Aang and Katara got separated from them, leaving just him (I know Zuko is stronger than Crazy!Azula but not to the point that she couldn’t cheapshot him) and Sokka (I know he is a badass, but as of current canon he is still weaker than Crazy!Azula) with her?

But most galling is the fact that he made this decision unilaterally without asking Mai and Ty Lee for their opinion, or, if he was adamant about agreeing to Azula’s terms, not providing them with 24/7 security until Azula was safely back in the asylum and/or prison.

For Azula was not just Zuko’s abuser, she was Mai and Ty Lee’s abusive friend and commander before almost killing Mai (The Boiling Rock Part 2 script said Azula was going to generate lightning) and then throwing the two into jail for life.

Considering that Mai saved Zuko’s life, that Ty Lee saved Mai (who is the love of Zuko’s life) and is part of Zuko’s current protection team, and that the both of them are closest thing to childhood friends that Zuko has, why didn’t Zuko treat them with the respect they deserved? Especially since post-redemption Zuko is someone who is supposed to be empathetic and caring?

But moving on to the rest of The Search, how come after Zuko found out about the “bastard” letter, how come he didn’t burn it? For even if he did want to find out the truth, isn’t it more important that he prevents a civil war by not allowing his “illegitimacy” to become public knowledge. At least until he can give power to Iroh in the case that he was truly a bastard?

Or, even if he didn’t want to burn the letter until Ursa confirmed the accuracy of it, why would he allow Azula to keep it on her person? I mean, what would have happened if she had managed to escape with it on her person? 

Sunshine and roses or a bloody civil war that threatens to undo everything Zuko and his friends fought for in the war?

Which ties into my last point about Zuko’s behavior in The Search (and to segue way into Smoke and Shadow) why the hell did Zuko not chase after Azula?!

For even if he would be risking his life and potentially Noriko’s, couldn’t Zuko have seen the danger in letting Azula free? Especially considering as far as he knew she still had the letter on her person?

Or, once Ursa had her face and memories restored, how come he didn’t leave Katara with Ursa and her family, and search for Azula with Aang and Sokka?

Did Zuko forget that it was all his fault in the first place that his life, as well as Noriko’s, was in danger and that he had a responsibility to the world, his country, and his friends to make sure Azula got back into his custody?

But anyway, even if Azula was still free, at least Azula is no longer a threat to Zuko, his regime, and/or anyone he cares about? 

Right?

Zuko (Smoke & Shadow)

After searching for Azula for a couple of weeks, he goes home and tells Ursa that he “tried.”

But did he really? Cause if we take his word at face value do you know what that means?

(Note: I think his statement could be interpreted to mean that Aang, Katara, Sokka, and him spent weeks searching the old fashioned way. But if that was the case he really didn’t try considering all the options he had. So I am taking Zuko’s statement at face value.)

That means a mentally broken Azula with no allies or no resources, managed to avoid an Avatar State powered seismic sense, June’s shirshu, Toph’s seismic sense, as well as anyone Iroh and/or the White Lotus sent over to help Zuko find his sister.

Do you know what that implies about the competency of everyone involved? How bad that makes them all look?

Anyway moving on, it appears that not only did Zuko fail to issue a public proclamation that Azula had escaped but also failed to give Ty Lee and Mai (and their families) protection. 

For if he had issued a proclamation maybe Azula would have been found earlier instead of being able to break six girls out of her asylum or manipulate the New Ozai Society (NOS)/Safe Nation Society. And in regards to Ty Lee and Mai, even if he felt they didn’t need protection while Azula was free but by his side, the moment she managed to escape him, he should have given them and their families protection.

For Zuko didn’t know that Azula wasn’t seeking revenge; as far as he knew she probably was going to kill everyone between her and the throne, including everyone who betrayed her. And even if Zuko hadn’t seen Mai since their break up, Ty Lee is part of his detail and thus Zuko should have realized how paranoid and scared she was and asked her what he could have done to alleviate her fears as well as her best friend Mai’s as well.

And Zuko still makes similar grave errors even after he finds out that Azula is behind the kidnappings and after he had found out that she had been manipulating the NOS/Safe Nation Society as part of a long-term plan to turn Zuko into a tyrant.

For after Kiyi’s kidnapping, instead of issuing curfews, searching Caldera City citizen’s homes without cause, and engaging in mass jailing of anyone who was on the streets when the Safe Nation Society was rioting he should have called all of the Gaang and had Iroh call the White Lotus before starting an all out manhunt for Azula and her followers.

And he especially should have done this after she told him his plan and he found that Aang had gotten knocked out by Azula’s henchwomen.

For not only has Azula basically gotten rid of his trump card over her (lighting redirection), she has become the GOAT lighting manipulator and H2H fighter in ATLA. That, combined with her and her Fire Warrior’s smoke bending abilities, makes them the biggest threat to Zuko’s throne and world peace. 

Thus, Zuko should have spent every waking moment hunting down Azula instead of doing stupid shit like going on a diplomatic trip to the South Pole. 

For I admit the image of the leaders and the most important people in the four nations eating with each other is a powerful one, but it is still hollow as long as the biggest threat to the post-world order is still roaming free and plotting to bring it to an end.

Aang (The Search)

Right off the bat when Zuko told him about the whole blackmail situation he should have either said ok but call in Toph as well as anyone else who he thought was needed or told Zuko that finding his mother was not worth it since the was a chance, no matter how small, that Azula could escape and put Azula back in the asylum himself.

For yeah, I know the first point sounds OOC but Aang out of all people should know how dangerous Azula is (the lighting wounds on his left foot and back say hi) and thus take the proper precautions. 

And yes, I know the second point sounds really OOC but doesn’t Aang know that his duty isn’t to his friends but to the world? And thus even if it hurts, he has to prioritize the world’s safety over his friend’s well-being and thus not allow arguably the most dangerous (both politically and bending wise) non-Avatar person in the world any chance of escaping?

Especially when it appears the only thing Azula regrets is losing and not any of the actions she took during the war?

But alas, this blatant disregard towards his duty as an Avatar continues not only when he finds that “bastard” letter with Zuko, but also when he fails to give chase to Azula after helping Ursa restore her face and memories.

For even after Zuko refused to burn the letter because he wanted to find out the truth, Aang should have taken the letter and burned it, or at least not let the letter get back into Azula’s hands.

For if that letter ever became public, it would ruin everything that Aang fought for in the war, for either Iroh (an old man who has no inclination to produce heirs as far as canon is concerned) would have to take the throne to prevent Ozai and/or Azula for taking it or it would cause a massive civil war considering Zuko is already on thin ice with his subjects.

And once he had helped Ursa restore her face, he should have entered the Avatar State and used his seismic sense before entering his elemental shield to look for Azula. 

For even if Azula is mentally broken at that point, she is still a Top 4 fire-bender, at worst, in the world with a strong claim to the throne and thus should be his highest priority. Not staying by Zuko’s side, especially now that he has been reunited with his mother and can adequately protect Ursa and her family now.

Aang (Smoke and Shadow)

Assuming that we take Zuko’s comments at face value about how he tried, what does that say about Aang that Azula not only managed to escape his Avatar powered seismic sense, but also that even with his elemental shield providing unmatched mobility, he still couldn’t find Azula?

But moving onto something that requires no assumptions: what he did, or didn’t, do after finding out that Azula was behind the Kemurikage kidnappings due to working with the New Ozai Society.

Why didn’t Aang call in the rest of The Gaang and/or White Lotus to help apprehend Azula? For the worst case scenario has happened and Azula is actively working to restore the old regime (as far as Aang knows at this point), has become the strongest firebender and H2H fighter in the world, and has regained her sanity (as far as he knows).

Considering all the harm Azula has caused, and is currently causing, how come Aang didn’t take every measure to make sure that Azula would get back into their custody as well as make sure the kidnapped kids were in no danger whatsoever?

How come when he went into that room to help rescue the kids, how come he didn’t have his guard up or enter the room with his elemental shield up?

For Aang knows that The Fire Warriors have smoke-bending abilities, it was smoke (combined with volcanic gases) that had killed his predecessor, and that the Fire Warriors are seditious, mass child kidnappers in league with Azula. 

So why didn’t Aang take them seriously?

For if Aang wasn’t protected by the fact that he has to die as a 66 year old man (LoK), after the Fire Warriors had knocked him out, they would have killed him instead of monologuing just long enough for Mai and Kei Lo to save him by knocking out the Warriors.

And then what? A world without a fully realized Avatar that is liable to fall back into war long before his successor could be identified and become a fully realized Avatar. Especially if Azula had killed Zuko in after their tomb shuffle, leaving no one really able to fight back against The Fire Warriors as they consolidate power and restart the 100 year war as far as Aang knows.

But most galling in my opinion is how Aang doesn’t drop everything and lead an all out manhunt for Azula and The Fire Warriors, especially once he found out that their true goal is to break Zuko and make him into a tyrant. For Aang out of all people should know what Azula is capable of when she is “sane.”

So why does he fuck off?! 

What is he going to say when The Fire Warriors do something irredeemable and/or unfixable and so Zuko and him and have to explain to the world community why Azula got free in the first place, why they lied about her involvement with The Kemurikage kidnappings, and why she has managed to avoid capture despite no longer having a nation-state backing her (and her lack of resources in general considering she is a homeless, penniless fugitive), and the fact that she is no match for the Avatar State (or even a bloodlusted 4 element Aang)?

Mai

A lot of people hate on Mai, calling her a bad, high-maintenance girlfriend who doesn’t understand Zuko and an undeveloped character among other things.

But I think TV!show Mai was a loving girlfriend who was trying her best with a boyfriend dealing with trauma on top of his precarious position in court before ultimately betraying her and her country without any warning from her POV.

Moreover, for a tertiary character, I think her arc is short, sweet, and powerful: she was a girl who was heavily implied to be forced into an abusive friendship for the sake of her father’s political career in addition to having to suppress her true emotions.

But, thanks to her boyfriend having the courage to stand up against their abusers, she learns to stand up against her abuser, while also helping her real best friend find the courage to also stand up against their mutual abuser, and is on the path to healing and learning how to establish healthy relationships.

In other words, Mai learns that she doesn’t have to put her head down and ignore her emotions/capacity for love. And it is this realization that allows her to help create the promise for a better day for herself, her boyfriend, her best friend, and the rest of the world, including her own nation once they come to the same realizations as she has.

But instead of continuing on that path, the comics have her completely forget the realization she had and have her behave OOC, in my opinion, in several contexts.

For even if she, like Ty Lee, where completely done dirty by Zuko in that he let Azula free without asking them how they felt about it before losing her and having the gall to not assign protection to them and their families until he recovers Azula, it doesn’t excuse the fact she hid from Zuko/the proper authorities the existence of the New Ozai Society and that her father and “boyfriend” where members of it, with her father leading and funding it as well.

For it is quite obvious what are the out-of-universe explanations for why Mai didn’t go straight to the palace after The Rebound (so Azula, who no longer has a nation-state backing her, would have the means and funds to manipulate terrorist groups as well as house her kidnapped kids as part of a longer plot to make Zuko snap) and tell Zuko but there is no good-in universe answer that is inline with her previously established character.

For when did Mai suddenly care about her father to the point that she was willing to commit treason by supporting, or at least covering up, his seditious plot? 

For didn’t Mai, as part of betrayal at the Boiling Rock, essentially betray her father and the rest of her family in favor of Zuko?

Moreover, why would she prioritize her father and his potential political power considering what would happen if Ozai ever got back into power? For I know Avatar is a children’s franchise but I am pretty sure one of Ozai’s first acts once he got back on the throne after he had Zuko, Ursa, Iroh, Noren, and Kiyi killed, would be killing her and Ty Lee for their treason. 

Especially considering that if hadn’t turned when she did, half the Gaang would have died and Ozai would have very likely won the war. For without Aang learning lighting redirection, unless rock-kun (rock-kun is the younger cousin of Naruto’s swing-kun) intervenes much earlier, Aang dies to Ozai’s lighting spam and no one else on the remaining Team Avatar is a match for Comet!Ozai except in the very unlikely chance Katara manages to develop 24/7 blood-bending in the aftermath of her brother’s death.

But alas, Mai decides to act in an OOC manner and hides from Zuko the existence of The New Ozai Society/Safe Nation Society until her Zuko’s half-sister, along with her brother, have been kidnapped by The Fire Warriors after Zuko, Ursa, Noren, and Kiyi barely survived a New Ozai Society ambush.

And by barely, I mean if it wasn’t for the combination of Ukano’s monologue, Kei Lo’s last minute heel-face turn, and Zuko managing to bullshit the greatest non-Avatar fire redirection feat in the franchise, Zuko and his family would have been burned to death and/or brutally stabbed to death.

But even more galling, when confronted with her treason, Mai claims that Zuko out of all people should know how hard it is to betray your father as if there wasn’t a difference between betraying the all powerful ruler of your country who has a cult of personality, has burned you before, can quickly fire off lethal amounts of lighting on command, and has said before he wanted to kill you versus betraying your mentally and physically weak father who rejected being integrated into the new government and seeks to put someone back in power who would likely kill you for committing treason against him.

Especially that Zuko accepts her explanation and no one in-universe or the narrative never challenges Mai on why she committed treason again.

For I understand that Mai is a tertiary character, and thus can’t have the same narrative focus in regards to her redemption arc like Zuko. But if the narrative is going to treat Mai as a hundred percent redeemed good guy, she should be held to the same standards and be criticized when she acts in a villainous manner.

But yet again, the comics fail to challenge Zuko for almost restarting the Hundred Year War instead of calmly showing Aang and Kuei why he revoked his unconditional support for the Harmony Restoration Movement so why should we expect any “hero” to face any criticism?

Ukano

How come Ukano was willing to work with Azula to restore Ozai for the sake of his nation and family when not only is Fire Lord Zuko indebted to him for life due to Mai saving him at The Boiling Rock (not to mention Zuko offering him a job when his governorship disappeared after Bumi retook Omashu), but also when one of the first things Ozai would do after taking back power is killing Mai for her treason (imo, it is clear that after Zuko’s defection, the only punishment for treason was death, with no chance for life in prison like Iroh had)?

What is Ukano’s plan for dealing with a fully realized Avatar considering that Ozai with Sozin’s Comet got utterly stomped by Aang? I don’t think it is wise, or in line with someone leading a vast seditious conspiracy, to rely on Azula getting another cheap shot on Aang or The Fire Warriors able to get one over Aang using their smoke-bending.

Also, as a matter of storytelling, why should I root for his heel-face turn and acceptance of his prison sentence when one of the last things he does before being sent to prison is subtly imply that he was manipulated/coerced by Azula.

For in-universe, didn’t Ukano have several opportunities to tell Aang and Zuko about the kidnapped kids? And out of universe, even if Azula is extremely dangerous, it is kind of pathetic to hear a grown-ass man essentially be bullied by a bunch of mentally ill teenagers.

I mean how would you react if someone in a similar situation tried pulling Ukano’s excuse? 

Sympathy or mockery?

But in any case, how am I supposed to feel that even if Ukano has to go to jail, he at least did good by standing up to Azula and her followers if Ukano tries to deflect blame by blaming Azula?

I mean, would Zuko’s apology to The Gaang during The Western Air Temple felt as sincere if he blamed Azula’s manipulations and the promise of his father’s love for why he acted the way he did during The Crossroads of Destiny even if it were valid explanations for his behavior? 

Would the audience have so readily accepted Zuko into The Gaang if Zuko didn’t take sole responsibility for his actions?

Ozai & Ursa (The Letter)

Note: Ursa is a kidnapping victim who is highly implied to never had consensual sex with Ozai and thus her kids were highly likely to be conceived without her consent. The combined trauma combined with the fact that Ozai had all the power in the household in addition to his emotional and (heavily implied by artwork) physical abuse explains almost all of her bad parenting decisions and behavior towards Azula and Zuko…except for what I am going to describe below imo. So the point of this is just to make it clear that I don’t blame Ursa for what went wrong in Zuko’s or Azula’s life, for the responsibility solely lies on Azulon and Ozai’s shoulders, I am just criticizing one particular choice she made in-universe and the creators’ out of universe decision to make her act in that fashion.

Most people talk about the letter in relation to Zuko and how it affects him but I have a very hot take: the letter only really exists to allow Azula to be a credible antagonist during The Search considering her still mentally broken state and the fact that Zuko, Katara, and/or Aang where keeping eyes on her at all times. 

That and to also facilitate a means for Azula to get free of her restraints and eventually escape Zuko’s custody because without blackmailing Zuko, Azula would have never been free, unbound, and treated with dignity.

Also, the letter serves to unnecessarily woobify Zuko but that is not the focus of this post.

So with that in mind, let’s delve into what that letter implies Ursa’s and Ozai’s characters.

In regards to Ursa, I find it hard to believe that someone who basically begged for her son’s life and constantly shielded him to the best of her abilities would reckless endanger Zuko’s life by writing a letter that claimed Ikem, not Ozai, was Zuko’s father.

For Ursa, out of all people, should know that she, along with Zuko, only have value to the Royal Family if Zuko is Ozai’s kid. And that if Ozai was so inclined, he could have used the letter to kil Zuko and/or herself.

And even if it is a hundred percent Ozai’s fault that he used the letter as an excuse to essentially treat Zuko as a bastard (though personally I think Ozai just continued treated Zuko the way he previously did and just said that to further emotionally abuse Ursa), why would Ursa ever give Ozai the means to (further) torment her beloved son? Especially when she knows Ozai, and most likely Azulon considering how quick he was to order Zuko’s death to punish Ozai, has it out for Zuko?

In regards to Ozai, the letter, and what he did and didn’t do with it, makes him even more incomptenent than what previous canon suggested.

For even if he couldn’t have used the letter during Azulon’s reign to get rid of Zuko and/or Ursa (ex. Due to fear of retaliation from Azulon due to being a “cuck”), how come he didn’t use the letter to disinherit Zuko, instead of burning Zuko and having to cover it up?

Or, after Zuko went full traitor, how come Ozai didn’t use the letter to ensure that Zuko could never inherit the throne…at least through his claim as Ozai’s son (Iroh could have adopted Zuko and then abdicated in favor of Zuko)?

Iroh

I understand that Iroh is technically retired and doesn’t have to do anything. Moreover, I understand that the adults in child/teenage led action-adventure series can’t really be as proactive and/or responsible as IRL adults due to the constraints of the genre.

But Iroh is still involved in politics as seen by his willingness to serve as Zuko’s temporary Fire Lord when Zuko is gone. Moreover, Legacy of The Fire Nation does say that Iroh is still a White Lotus Grandmaster during the period the White Lotus becomes the Avatar world’s version of the UN Peacekeepers.

So with that in mind, we can criticize his lack of proactiveness in regards to Azula. For even taking away the assumption that Iroh offered the White Lotus’ help to find Azula after she ran into The Forgetful Forest, how come after Azula has been found to be masterminding the Kemurikage kidnappings, or after Azula revealed her plan to turn Zuko into a dictator, Iroh didn’t drop everything, call up the White Lotus, and lead a manhunt for The Fire Warriors?

For not only is Azula the biggest threat to world peace and balance in their world, she is the biggest threat to Zuko throne and safety. Especially after she has removed Iroh and Zuko’s one trump card over her (lighting redirection) and is arguably way stronger (at least as a combatant) than Ozai ever was.

For someone who lost his son and watched his beloved nephew be abused due to the effects of the Fire Nation’s imperialism and authoritarianism, why doesn’t Iroh make sure that the horrors of the past just stay in the past? Especially when he has the power, means, and connections this time around to make sure no one ever gets hurt again, not now and not in the future?

Ty Lee

In regards to The Search, Ty Lee was mistreated by Zuko when he first took Azula out without asking Mai or her about their feelings and then when he had the gall to lose her without granting her and Mai (and their families) 24/7 protection.

Though if Ty Lee is as much of a chi-blocking master as the narrative implies, when she warned Zuko that Azula’s chi-blocking was wearing off, she should have also warned him that there would be a period of time that Azula would be super flexible and have full control of her muscles and chi.

For even if Ty Lee had no idea that Azula had apparently learned instant lighting in the two years she had spent in the asylum, Azula is still capable of short bursts of fire that could have disoriented Zuko, leading to a similar outcome as to what actually happened in canon once Azula had the above period of time.

But moving on to something much more concrete, Ty Lee remembering the Fire Nation Palace’s secret tunnels and being able to pinpoint locate the one leading to Azula’s secret lair has some very negative implications about Ty Lee.

For even if she says it in a really roundabout way, The Sisters comics has Ty Lee say that she joined The Kyoshi Warriors at least in part to make up for the imperialism she helped perpetuate under Azula’s command.

Moreover, The Kyoshi Warriors agreed to be Zuko’s bodyguards in order to help protect the fragile peace that The Gaang helped establish at the end of the war. And in order to do so that means they have to be able to secure the Fire Nation Palace to the best of their abilities.

However, despite knowing about these secret tunnels, Ty Lee apparently never mentioned them in the year that the Kyoshi Warriors had been in The Fire Nation (The Promise takes place one year after Sozin’s Comet Part 4; The Kyoshi Warriors become Zuko’s bodyguards during The Promise; The Search takes place one year after The Search with the main plot of Smoke and Shadow taking place a couple of months after the climax of The Search).

And this lead to not only The Fire Warriors being able to walk into the palace and almost kidnap Kiyi unmolested (in fact, if it wasn’t for their smoke, The Fire Warriors would have kidnapped Kiyi without anyone being wiser), but for an entire conspiracy to operate right under their noses.

Not to mention what could have happened if The Fire Warriors where a little bit less mentally ill and used the fact that they had access to secret tunnels that no one knew about to do the obvious: carry out covert assassinations of all their enemies, which, depending on the time, could include important foreign figures like Aang, Katara, and Sokka.

Making things worse is that just like Mai really wasn’t challenged narratively or by anyone in-universe for her treason, Ty Lee is never challenged by the narrative or by her fellow warriors, Zuko, and/or Aang for knowing such a gaping security hole and not telling anyone earlier.

I mean the lack of knowledge of the secret tunnels could help, partially at least, explain why Zuko faced so many assination attempts, like Kori’s, that got frighteningly close to killing him. 

For instead of his original guard being disloyal and/or incomptenent, they could have had a lack of knowledge about the tunnels and thus didn’t know how to protectly seal them off and/or monitor them for threats.

Like I understand Azula being freed probably impacted her ability to think rationally (Ty Lee all but says she hasn’t had a peaceful night of sleep ever since Azula got out) but it doesn’t excuse the fact that she forgot to tell anyone about this security gap beforehand.

For doesn’t Ty Lee have a professional and moral duty to protect the Fire Nation palace and The Royal Family to the best of her abilities?

Kei Lo

I don’t hold him to the same standards as the heroes and outright adults in this analysis since  most of Rebound and Smoke and Shadow was about his heel-face turn and redemption arc.

But there is one thing that does bother me about post-redemption Kei Lo’s actions and this is when he attacked Azula in The Garden of Tranquil Souls without any apparent plan and got himself turned into a (brief) hostage.

For I understand that it was a moment to not only show how far Kei Lo had, but also to show Azula evilness by mocking Mai’s taste in men and implicitly threatening his life for daring to touch her/interrupt her “dialogue” bullying, assault, and psychological torture of with Mai.

But looking at Kei Lo’s actions from the bigger picture, they don’t really make sense and don’t paint a good picture of Kei Lo at all.

For Kei Lo had not only seen Mai defeat an entire NOS hideout with a toddler strapped to her back, Kei Lo was in fact the last person she fought before she left (spoiler alert: it was a total curb stomp battle).

Moreover, during the time that he had spent dating Mai and spent with Zuko and Aang, it is highly unlikely that the topic of Azula didn’t come up even if there was no comic panels showing us this (when you have limited space, you can’t waste panels on “superfluous” dialogue) and should have known that just like Mai was way out of league in terms of combat prowess, Azula is similarly beyond his abilities.

In addition, even if he didn’t believe what people mostly likely told him about Azula, he should have believed his own eyes as he wanted Azula basically toy with Mai despite Mai actually fighting with true lethal intent (I know some people might disagree with me but the art makes it clear that Mai was trying to kill Azula and not just pin her).

And finally, instead of rationally thinking and trying to get Zuko and/or Aang’s attention so someone way more equipped could help rescue Mai, he charges at Azula. But instead of using his knife or trying to get Azula into a chokehold, he just shoves her. 

Allowing Azula to not only shoot him with concussive lighting but then hold him at firepoint, forcing Mai, who had been able to stand up to Azula, albeit terribly I admit, to basically beg for Kei Lo’s life and leave herself vulnerable to Azula’s attacks as well.

For I know they are not analogous situations, but what Kei Lo did reminds me of dumbasses who try to intervene in active shooting situations, thinking they can be the hero, but end up making things worse due to being taken hostage, if they aren’t outright killed, making a peacefully resolution that much harder for the relevant authorities.

Likewise, Kei Lo, by getting himself taken hostage, could have, and should have as far as he knew, led to a nasty outcome. 

For as far as he knows, Azula is a sadistic, seditious, child-killing, child kidnapping, genocidal domestic terrorist who has no qualms about killing or cruelly treating “friends” or family. And so what is not to say that Azula wouldn’t have tortured him to get back at Mai and/or tortured Mai in front of him, forcing Mai to take her cruel punishment in order to prevent Azula from killing her boyfriend?

Kei Lo is very lucky that Zuko intervened when he did and is even more lucky that Azula was more interested in making her brother “strong” than really hurting anyone.

But instead of showing everyone berating him after the kids had been rescued, there was no narrative time spent at all. 

Which leads me to believe that that particular moment just happened, in part, just to showcase how vile Azula is despite in not being in line, imo, with the conscientious and aware person Kei Lo seemed to be growing into (as seen when he broke up with Mai since he realized despite being aloof for Smoke and Shadow that Mai could never get over Zuko).

Sokka & Katara

There isn’t much to say other than they were the only ones who interacted with post-canon Azula who treated her like the threat she.

That and it was obvious they were written out of Smoke and Shadow before Azula’s involvement with the kidnappings was revealed because if they were still in the Fire Nation when it happened, Azula and her girl gang would be back in jail instead of remaining menaces to society. 

Or at least at bare minimum they would have had to work much harder during the climax (ex. The Fire Warriors, including Azula, would have had to fight with lethal intent).

Toph

Other than the assumption that Toph helped Zuko search for Azula after the climax of The Search, all I have to say is that there is a good reason why Toph has not really shown up in any of the comics Azula has been. 

And that is because Toph would have never tolerated any of Azula’s bullshit or treated her with kid gloves instead of the genocidal war criminal who is still trying to negatively influence Fire Nation politics that she is as of current canon.

Other World Leaders

Note: Yes, there is no evidence that Azula was part of the war council meeting that ordered the attack on the Northern Water Tribe. But considering how comfortable Azula was in the “let’s burn down The Earth Kingdom” war council meeting plus the fact that Iroh thought it was appropriate for a 13 year old Zuko to partake in a war council meeting, I don’t think it is that much of a leap to assume that Azula was part of the war council meeting that ordered the Northern Water Tribe attack.

From Kuei’s perspective, Azula led a coup that ended with him in exile before suggesting and helping plan a genocide of his people. From Hakoda’s perspective, Azula almost killed both of his children several times. From Chief Arnook’s perspective, Azula was part of the war council that decided to not only invade his country, but to also kill the Moon Spirit and indirectly force his beloved daughter to sacrifice her life to restore said spirit.

So once Azula gets into Zuko’s custody, shouldn’t they have had established monitoring protocols to make sure that Zuko, who had less than six months ago willingly worked with her to conqueror Ba Sing Se and help Azula kill Aang, keeps one of the most dangerous war criminals in their world locked up while also establishing contingency plans to deal with scenarios in which Azula escapes?

Especially since Aang took mercy on her and didn’t remove her bending, meaning that Azula could grow stronger if she ever escapes (though I guess being in an asylum does allow for exponential growth anyway…) and eventually be able to get a cheap shot on Aang again before violently retaking the throne and restarting the 100 year war?

But instead of doing that, they naively trust that Zuko will keep Azula locked up without any check-ups (none of Zuko’s interactions with Kuei or Hadoka ever imply the topic of Azula’s status ever comes up). And while I understand the meta-reason for this (so it is more believable that Azula could remain an undetectable fugitive), it still has the potential to make them all look really, really bad.

For what happens, for example, The Fire Warriors create an international false flag terrorist attack that gets people from the other nations killed, in addition to Fire Nationals, that leads to a short skirmish that gets even more people killed before The Fire Warriors are found to be the true culprits and dealt with.

For even if they manage to capture The Fire Warriors, how are the world leaders going to explain to their subjects/citizens the lack of security measures they took in ensuring that Azula stayed in jailed or, if she ever escaped, the lack of plans to make sure she was apprehended as swiftly as possible?

Moreover, how are they going to explain the fact that they naively wholeheartedly trusted Zuko to make sure that Azula remained in prison or, if she escaped, that he would tell them and ask for their help if needed in apprehending her instead of trying to cover up the fact that it was his selfish desire to find mommy that gave the most dangerous person on the planet the means to escape? 

Especially after the Yu Dao fiasco showed that Zuko might not be the most trustworthy or reliable partner?

Do any of them take their responsibilities seriously!? No and that is why the Red Lotus had a point for why should a bunch of clowns be in charge of nation-states if they can’t even use state power to properly protect people.

Bending & Combat

One of the more endearing things about Avatar is the fact that its combat & magic system is based on IRL martial arts. And this is reflected in the fact that all of the named prodigies except for Katara & Sokka (who likely the greatest prodigies in the franchise in terms of speed of skill acquisition and mastery) have undergone years of rigorous training to be the master benders and fighters that they are shown to be in the show.

Moreover, the show explains that bending & fighting are not just martial arts, but are also a spiritual practice as well and that the more spiritually in tune you are the stronger your combat prowess will be. And that the less spiritual and/or the more out of balance you are, the weaker your combat prowess will be. 

For not only does your mental state affect things like your breathing or tactics, but also your willingness to incorporate other styles of bending/fighting into yours as well.

And the show makes it very clear that the strongest and best benders/fighters incorporate all the other styles of bending.

Finally, the show, whenever it introduced new bending/fighting techniques and/or power ups, made sure they didn’t contradict what was previously established (ex. Metal bending is possible only because most metal still has pieces of unrefined earth in them; chi-blocking is possible because everything has chi in it) or gave them logical weaknesses to make sure they weren’t completely game breaking (ex. Lighting redirection does negate lighting bending, but you need to be in the proper stance and make sure the lighting never touches your heart or else you will still die; chi-blocking only works if you can touch someone).

But the comics, in an effort to keep Azula a credible threat, seem to disregard all of the previously established rules and themes about bending and in doing so leaves the Avatar franchise in a worse off state.

For why was Azula, after two years in an asylum where it can be presumed she wasn’t able to train like she used to, didn’t have anywhere near the same resources, and went further into psychosis was able to retain her physicality and remain the hype-athletic fighter she was during the war?

Moreover, how did Azula get so strong and fast during her time in the asylum (and later in the wilderness and as a fugitive) to the point that she is arguably the best H2H fighter in Avatar?

For not only did Azula manage to hold off a serious and in armor post-canon Suki and Ty Lee despite wearing a billowing cape and a mask that blocked vision in her left eye, she also managed to consistently and causally dodge Mai’s knives despite the latter actually trying to kill her.

Not to mention how she managed to over-power Zuko, who was arguably the second best swords fighter in the franchise before having two years to add to his sword fighting prowess, in their short fire-sword fight in the tomb to the point that Zuko thought he could only prevent his death by convincing Azula that no one would ever accept her on the throne.

Zuko! You know the person who literally has to be knocked out and/or dying before giving up in a fight did not believe he could get out of Azula’s hold before she presumably stabbed him to death.

How come Azula’s fire managed to not only get stronger (ex. During the war, if she released her fire from her control it became orange, but after the asylum, it stays blue) but also why was Azula able to develop several new lighting techniques, several of which where completely unseen in the franchise, or hadn’t been seen for centuries as far as the reader was concerned (ex. Concussive lighting; instant lighting; quick charge lighting; lighting sphere; a bootleg chidori; instant area of effect lighting; lighting zaps; the ability to split and control her stream of lighting after she has fired it; lighting redirection).

And speaking of new lighting techniques, how did Azula manage to learn the lighting redirection technique on her own? For none of Iroh, Zuko, and Aang ever showed her the technique and Azula only saw the technique like four times (Iroh on the ship during The Avatar State; Zuko during Sozin’s Comet; Zuko twice during The Search). 

And as far as I remember, the TV show never implied or showed that Azula was a Goku-level prodigy in that she only had to look at technique only a handful of times to completely master it and/or develop a counter to it.

Not to mention the fact that Azula is still a hyper-nationalist who still has no respect for the other nations, let alone their bending arts.

Like have you seen all the times she calls Sokka and Katara snow peasants despite the two of them technically being her equal politically, Katara defeating Azula during Sozin’s Comet and almost defeating her during The Crossroads of Destiny? Does comics!Azula seem like the person to willingly incorporate waterbending principles into her bending, which is necessary to redirect lighting?

Also, what the hell is smoke-bending?! For I know in the Kyoshi novels, Kyoshi bends smoke as part of her first attempt at firebending and that Aang generated smoke during The Firebending Master (so smoke-bending is a subset of firebending as the seeming precursor to firebending itself).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqLW99cn1A8

But how did The Fire Warriors manage to learn how to psychically generate and manipulate smoke?

Moreover, how did The Fire Warriors manage to learn how to use smoke-bending while using their firebending at the same time? 

For as far as I know, other than Azula in the Smoke and Shadow Omnibus Cover, there is no other instance as far as I know of a non-Avatar bending an element and a sub-element at the same time. So how were they able to do so?

And how come Aang and Zuko (two master firebenders, one of which is also a master airbender) were not able to do anything about The Fire Warrior’s smoke? 

For shouldn’t they have been able to use their bending to clear to smoke instead of either choking on it (Aang) or allowing Azula to escape despite being a tomb with only one exit (Zuko)?

But I think the most frustrating thing is how strong the Fire Warriors are. For yes, I understand that the Gaang aren’t the only prodiges in the world and that for a children’s action-adventure series, it is hard to write conflicts if heroes face no physical challenges whatsoever.

But there is no justification both in-universe or out of it for why the Fire Warriors are so strong both in terms of bending but also in terms of athleticism as well. Especially considering the fact they were heavily implied to have been kept in the same conditions that Azula was (and thus shouldn’t have been able to train to an elite master level) and the fact that they too were wearing long billowing capes with their left eyes blocked by their wood masks.

In fact, this ties into my next point…

Fire Warriors & The Asylum System

How was Azula able to break out six girls from her old asylum without Zuko finding out? For even assuming that Azula killed everyone there, eventually someone had to have come and found out that at least six girls where missing? Especially when, assuming Zuko really did try to find Azula, one of the things he would have done is put a guard there since it was likely that Azula would try to return there.

But instead of getting an answer on how Azula was able to break them out without anyone finding out (other than the meta-textual answer of Azula needed a new girl gang and the only people who she could have plausibly convinced considering her living conditions of the past 2 years were her fellow asylum inmates), all we are left with is speculation, some of which implies some very nasty things about Zuko’s reign and The Fire Nation. 

Like the idea that the asylum system remained in control of Ozai loyalists and are currently weaponizing the inmates to create a shadow army to overthrow Zuko using the group of people Zuko and his regime would be least likely to suspect.

And speaking of speculation, what are The Fire Warriors’ motivations and/or goals in regards to joining Azula’s ongoing seditious domestic terrorism plot? For I understand that Azula needs new hench-women in order to carry out her plots since it would break the suspension of disbelief to have Azula carry them out by herself, but neither non-ableist explanation I could think of makes any sense.  

For either they are scared of her and/or being manipulated, but that doesn’t make sense since Azula no longer has any political power and thus they can ignore her once she breaks them out. Not to mention Azula doesn’t seem to have regained all of her mental faculties (ex. her Mochi rant during Smoke and Shadow and how her eyes bulge out like crazy!Azula in The Search at the end of the rant). 

Or because she became non-ironic friends with them, which doesn’t make sense since Azula during her time in the asylum was clearly not in the mental state to take care of herself, let alone make friends not relying on her status or fear-mongering. Especially when The Search has Azula blame “Ursa” for making Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee stop fearing her, heavily implying Azula still thinks fear is a good way to maintain relationships.

Which leaves us with the ableist answer (sorry for the language, it is to get my point across): they are crazy bitches and crazy bitches don’t need any reason to do harm!

And do you know how harmful that is to IRL mentally ill people? For mentally ill people have had to fight really, really hard to fight the association that being mentally ill makes you evil or prone to evil. And it is only recently they have been able to fight back against such associations thanks in part due to positive representations in various artistic works.

So it makes me really disappointed that Avatar, a franchise that handles several difficult topics (ex. Child abuse, rescue parents, imperialism/colonialism, child soldiers, physical disabilities, war orphans, sexism/misogyny, hyper-nationalism, genocide, abusive sibling relationships, abusive friendships, etc.) with such grace that even children can clearly understand and learn from them, engaged in such harmful stereotyping. Especially when one of the most highly regarded arcs in LoK is Korra overcoming her PTSD from being poisoned with mercury over the course of several years and with the help of several people.

For at least Azula, with all the cries of ableism about her treatment in the comics and other post-canon works like Legacy of The Fire Nation, has reasons for being evil other than her mental illness. 

Like the fact that she was indoctrinated and groomed from birth to be an active member of the ruling family of an authoritarian, genocidal, imperialism empire.

But what are the Fire Warrior’s reasons for helping Azula outside of being mentally ill?

Themes (The Search)

To be quite honest, I really don’t think The Search has a theme since it mostly exists to answer the question of what happened to Ursa. So I don’t think there is much to analyze or criticize in terms of themes.

Themes (Smoke and Shadow)

However, Smoke and Shadow does have a central theme: fear, or more importantly, getting over the fear of: Ozai (for Ursa), Azula, and/or being a tyrant (in Zuko’s case).

And in regards to Ozai, I think Smoke and Shadow actually did a good job of showing Ursa getting over her fear of Ozai. In fact, I think their confrontation in Ozai’s jail cell, with Ozai being reduced to a mad dog after seeing he has no hold on Ursa anymore is one of the few good things that come out of the comics.

But in regards to the other two themes, which are heavily tied to each in my opinion, are butchered by the need to keep Azula a credible villain.

For I think fear does serve a valid purpose: to make sure we avoid situations and/or people that are likely to put ourselves or the people we love in danger. 

And boy do a lot of people have a lot to fear about post-Smoke and Shadow.

Mai and Ty Lee have every reason to continue to fear Azula after Azula basically humiliated them in combat and made it very clear that they are only still alive because Azula wants them to be. Not to mention in Mai’s case, Azula basically bullied Ukano into action, causing her father to eventually have to go to jail for a long time, and kidnapped her brother before put him in a holding cell for a good period of time.

Aang has ever reason to continue to fear Azula considering she has several lighting attacks that can bypass lighting redirection, the fact that Azula herself knows lighting redirection, the fact that Azula has smoke bending powers similar to The Fire Warriors that caused him to be knocked out cold, and that Azula has successful shown that she can cause Zuko to fall down the path of his ancestors, meaning that Azula could eventually succeed and indirectly wipe out everything Aang and his friends fought for during the war.

Zuko has ever reason to fear Azula considering: she basically broke into the palace and operated a conspiracy from right under his nose; she kidnapped a bunch of kids, including their half-sister, and he could do nothing until Ty Lee remembered the secret passageway; that she has taken away his trump card over her and has essentially become the strongest firebender in history; that he is only alive because Azula has plans for him; and that she is still loose and plotting the next step in her dastardly plot to remake Zuko in her image.

Moreover, Zuko has every reason to fear turning into a tyrant since he not only has failed to capture The Fire Warriors post-Smoke and Shadow, all that he has done to show that he won’t fall prey to the Fire Warriors manipulations and assaults once.

He doesn’t order a sweep of his government to make sure that there aren’t any more mavericks like Constable Sung in his ranks. 

He doesn’t try to craft policies to ensure the various Ozai loyalists groups can’t take advantage of alienated people like Kei Lo to fill their ranks with people willing to die since they have nothing in life. 

He doesn’t institute any safeguards or protocols to make sure that if he has to ever institute authoritarian measures ever again, he does so because it was the best and logical decision possible and not out of fear. 

He hasn’t undergone training (ex. Combine his firebending with his sword skills as is implied in the “Old Friends” artwork) to close the gap that has once again opened between him and Azula so that if he ever encounters Azula again, his life won’t be in her hands once more.

Hell! People like Iroh, Noren and Ursa have a lot to fear considering that Azula has easily breached the palace (and probably has other means of getting in undetected even if the tunnels are now known since she was responsible for evacuating Caldera City during the DoBS), one of the secure places in the world, and has demonstrated continued willingness to not only hurt Zuko but also now hurt Kiyi.

Moreover, assuming they ever find out where the other Fire Warriors came from, they will (and should considering their eras’ lack of knowledge on mental health) fear the inmates in the asylum system. 

For if six of them were willing to join Azula and were really strong benders who could even knock out a fully realized Aang, what will happen, hypothetically, when Azula builds herself an army out of the asylum inmates she and her warriors break out of the various asylums in the country?

So I guess what I am trying to say is that, by keeping Azula a villain, Smoke and Shadow undermined its own theme of “we have to learn to live with fear and never let it rule us.”

For only fools would not live in fear of Azula and The Fire Warriors until they are apprehended and I don’t think any of the characters mentioned in this section are big enough fools to underestimate what Azula and The Fire Warriors can do and what they are willing to do to achieve their goals.

Conclusion

Azula was one of the best villains in Western Animation and part of that is because the characters and the narrative treated her like the threat she was and that, even if her schemes did rely on good fortunes (ex. Sokka vouching for The Kyoshi Warriors before leaving with Aang to his father) they were created by various characters acting like they did normally and not in OOC fashion (ex. Kuei is an airheaded fool and so it is not out of character for Kuei to forget that he told Azula about the DoBS invasion plan and/or tell anyone associated with the plan that he spilled the beans before going on exile) just so Azula could win. 

Moreover, Azula doesn’t display new powers/abilities when the plot demands it just to remain a threat; all she does is exploit her previously established abilities and intelligence/cunning (ex. The Avatar is slowly floating up in the air in his Avatar State that is previously established to turn him into a berserking force of nature. Ok. I’ll just take advantage of the fact that he is exposed to shoot him dead with lighting before he can harm my allies, my friends, my brother, and/or I).

However, in the comics, Azula, despite remaining just as big as a threat, if not bigger, is not treated as such by either the narrative or the characters she interacts with. Moreover, Azula and her henchwomen frequently come up with new powers just so they remain a credible threat. And it not only ruins Azula as a villain, but also the characters that she has the misfortune of interacting with directly or indirectly.

For it really hurt to see a fully realized Aang essentially get knocked out by some faceless goons.

It really hurt to see Mai break up with Zuko because he visited Ozai without telling her and then hide from Zuko the existence of the New Ozai Society and the fact that her father was leading it. Not to mention, when confronted for treason, seeing her avoid owning her mistake before everyone unceremoniously dropped the subject.

It really hurt to see post-canon Suki and Ty Lee, two of the best H2H fighters who have learned each other’s techniques, essentially get fodderized by a half-blind Azula. Or to see Azula learn lighting redirection with no prior indication of how she managed to learn the technique. Or to see her invent concussive lighting because the comics want her to spam her iconic lighting at everyone like the villain she is but don’t want to deal with the consequences previously established in the TV show or in LoK.

It made me angry to see Zuko keep giving Azula second chance after second chance when Azula deserves no chances as long as she is on her current path. Especially when she keeps on hurting the people Zuko supposedly loves and the subjects he supposedly cares about.

Anyway, before my rant gets too long, the point is that not that Azula can’t remain a good villain. For even I, as someone who believes an Azula redemption would be compelling, believe there are ways to keep Azula a credible antagonist in line with what was shown in the TV show.

But if this is the way Azula is going to be continued to be written as a villain, as a living plot device, I don’t want her to remain a villain. 

Especially when the bad writing surrounding villain!Azula starts to ruin other character’s previously established characterization as well as previously established world building and lore.

–Submitted by justanotherthrowaway1950

[dontbipanicjonsa]

The Unkiss

TW: discussion of sexual assault

The purpose of this post is to explore how and why the Unkiss came to be, and speculate (poorly) on what purpose it may serve in the future. Read under the cut  (thanks @esther-dot )

So, I’m going to tell everyone right away that I’m not a very big fan of the pre-existing theories surrounding the Unkiss. Specifically, I tend to disagree with the “how”. This is partly because I think all the explanations offered are too Freudian (*shudder*) and partly because I’ve had a similar instance myself so I tend to project (sue me). 

THE HOW

First, let’s look at the pre-existing theories: 

The Unkiss is actually a sexual fantasy that Sansa has confused with the real events that happened (exactly what Freud would say. Creepy fuck.)

Sansa invented the Unkiss to romanticize an otherwise traumatic event so she could cope with it better. 

Is there any other theory I’m missing? These are the ones I know. 

I’m going to jump straight to the second theory. The issue (for me) in this theory is that it sort of assumes that Sansa herself would consider that kiss “romantic” or that it would somehow help her cope the BoB night.

He yanked her closer, and for a moment she thought he meant to kiss her. He was too strong to fight. She closed her eyes, wanting it to be over, but nothing happened. - Sansa VII ACOK

This is the moment. She is expecting a kiss, but wanting it to be over. It’s very clear that the kiss would have been non-con. More importantly, it looks like Sansa herself would consider the kiss non-con. 

Why on earth would Sansa invent a kiss she didn’t want in the first place to make coping with an already traumatic event easier? 

He kissed me and threatened to kill me, and made me sing him a song. - Sansa II ASOS

This is the first time we are introduced to the Unkiss, and it shows that Sansa’s memory of that night is perfectly intact. The Unkiss is an addition. It isn’t replacing any other, more traumatic memory (like the threat to her life). 

Now this is what I think happened:

Her emotions were running high that night, and her mind muddled up real events with the memory of that mounting (practically tangible) terror. 

Yeah, it’s that simple. You know how you get really angry in a fight and then later you can’t recall the exact the words? Memory is unreliable. There are plenty of studies to show the varied effects trauma has on memory. There are plenty of studies to show how easily memory can distort. There doesn’t need to be a great, complex reason for Sansa to misremember a traumatic event. Also remember that Sansa may not be entirely sober for this encounter, since Cersei did make her chug that wine before. 

Being stuck in a situation where you’re terrified and anticipating some sort of assault any second? Having a single moment where the emotions peak, where you’re sure the assault is going to happen right that moment? Misremembering if the assault did or didn’t happen later? Yup. Been there, done that. I still don’t remember what happened, and it’s been years. I sure as fuck wasn’t romanticizing shit, so it never occurred to me to think that Sansa might be. So when I heard the theories I went back to her chapters and honestly, I don’t think she is either. Not yet.  

Then this happened:

She could still remember how it felt, when his cruel mouth pressed down on her own. He had come to Sansa in the darkness as green fire filled the sky. He took a song and a kiss, and left me nothing but a bloody cloak. - Alayne II AFFC

Now this is Sansa romanticizing the Unkiss. She romanticizes the kiss she remembers. That does not mean she invented the kiss to romanticize the BoB, it only means she remembers a non-con kiss from a traumatic night and chose to romanticize it to cope. See the difference? 

The kiss isn’t a way for her to romanticize her trauma to cope, she romanticizes the kiss that was a result of her trauma- to cope. 

I won’t be so sure of this theory though, because (no offense) but GRRM does seem like the kind of guy who would read Freud and incorporate his ideas in his story. There’s already a shit load of incest and let’s admit it, Sansa canonically has daddy issues. How far or in-depth did GRRM think about the “how” of the Unkiss? We don’t know. 

THE WHY

Well, this one has been explained by GRRM himself:

You will see, in A STORM OF SWORDS and later volumes, that Sansa remembers the Hound kissing her the night he came to her bedroom... but if you look at the scene, he never does. That will eventually mean something, but just now it's a subtle touch, something most of the readers may not even pick up on. - GRRM 

He also said:

File this one under "unreliable narrator" and feel free to ponder its meaning...- GRRM 

So, it’s safe to say that the Unkiss is basically being used to establish that Sansa has an unreliable memory. Of course, other characters probably have unreliable memory too (for example: Arya misremembering the name of Joffrey’s sword) but this is still most likely about Sansa. 

Sansa has always been considered an unreliable narrator by the GA anyway, since so much of her narration in the first book was at odds with the narration of Ned and Arya, who were both fan favourites at the time. This should probably indicate to the readers that the other characters are unreliable narrators as well, but it doesn’t. People carry on reading simply assuming that only Sansa’s POV is unreliable, or at least the most unreliable. So using Sansa’s POV to lay the groundwork for memory issues in someone else’s POV is...not gonna work. 

This doesn’t necessarily prove that the pay-off of the Unkiss is going to come from Sansa’s POV only, but it makes it seem likely. So I’m going to restrict myself to looking at the possibilities of misremembering stuff from Sansa’s POV. 

One more thing we need to look at before we start looking at future possibilities:

"It's not the same," Sansa said. "The Hound is Joffrey's sworn shield. Your butcher's boy attacked the prince." - Sansa III AGOT

On the surface, this looks like another memory edit. The situation is remarkably similar; it was a traumatic event for Sansa, she was not entirely sober when it happened, and now she is misremembering what happened. We know that Mycah did not attack Joffrey, Joffrey attacked Mycah. However, it’s not quite the same. For one, we don’t actually know if Sansa believes that, or if she’s just trying to be contrary to Arya. 

Also- 

"Sansa, come here." Ned had heard her version of the story the night Arya had vanished. He knew the truth. "Tell us what happened." - Eddard III AGOT

Sansa had told Ned what happened. But then she said-

She blinked at her sister, then at the young prince. "I don't know," she said tearfully, looking as though she wanted to bolt. "I don't remember. Everything happened so fast, I didn't see …"- Eddard III AGOT 

So.......is she lying or did her memory actually get fuzzy afterwards? What exactly did she tell Ned? Considering that he’s the one who asks her to “testify”, I’d assume she told things as they really happened (as in Joffrey attacked Mycah). Did her memory of the events slowly fade...and then reverse (as in Mycah attacked Joffrey)? Or is she just taking the neutral stance here, and later the opposing stance (Joffrey’s side) in her fight with Arya? We don’t know. 

PURPOSE IT MAY SERVE GOING FORWARD

First, let’s assume that the Trident accident really does count as a memory edit. This would mean that Sansa has edited her memory twice now, which makes it very likely that a third memory edit is coming. There are two directions this can go-

The third memory edit has already happened pre-canon (so technically it would be the first edit)

The third memory edit is going to happen sometime in the next two books.

Warning: this is where I get back on my Jonsa bullshit. Turn back now if you don’t wanna watch me make everything about Jonsa.

Pre-canon Jonsa crush 

If the first option is true, and Sansa has already edited her memory once that we don’t yet know about, then a pre-canon crush/moment between her and Jon is...a pretty strong possibility. 

I’ll admit, I’m very very skeptical of the pre-canon crush, simply because I think there isn’t enough evidence or foreshadowing for it. On the other hand, the groundwork has already been laid, if GRRM were to go in this direction..it would be believable. Shocking, but believable. 

We have numerous mentions of kissing games in the godswoods. We have a pre-canon conversation between Sansa and Jon about How To Hit On Ladies. And much more. The possibility is there. 

Sansa having a crush on Jon and being so traumatized she replaced Jon with Waymar Royce?? Sansa getting tipsy on watered down wine and giving Jon a blue rose-

There are other possibilities though, for example, a fight between Sansa and her father and/or Arya that she’s not remembering correctly. It would explain her daddy issues (even more) and work to create conflict between her and Arya (why though). But I don’t THINK there’s any evidence for that..? I don’t know I’m just throwing out ideas.

Moving on to the second option- a third memory edit to come

These memory edits are not likely to be nearly as innocent. 

One possibility I’ve heard about is Sansa forgetting her identity and sinking into Alayne. No. Very Unlikely. Sansa’s Stark identity appears to be going strong even in the TWOW preview chapter.

Second possibility- Sansa memory edits Lysa’s death. 

She was mad and dangerous. She murdered her own lord husband, and would have murdered me if Petyr had not come along to save me.- Alayne I AFFC 

It’s...possible? But it looks like she does remember what Lysa said and how she died. She’s just suppressing/dismissing the parts that implicate Littlefinger, which is not the same as a memory edit, where the memory is changed somehow. 

More possibilities- Littlefinger will do something and that will lead to a memory edit. She’ll flee from the Vale and run into Ramsay (I dearly hope not) and bam trauma -> memory edit. The possibilities are pretty much endless. 

Now let’s assume that the incident on the Trident was not a memory edit. This means she’s only had one memory edit yet....in which case the pay-off is probably something kiss-related, or it is something she remembers, but which didn’t really happen. A pre-canon kiss, or some serious Freudian shit that I’ve been trying desperately to avoid, a Sansa-Sandor faceoff....yea I’m not actually good at speculation.