#anyway i miss nathan

[harocat]

Remember when people were like 'omg it's a good thing for Nathan Chen that sports is gender segregated, because if Sasha Trusova could compete against him it would be over for him.'

She couldn't even win any major senior women's events, and they thought she'd beat Nathan Chen???

[thetarttfuldickhead]

Coach Beard has a secret Traitors Club. It consists of himself, Nate and Jamie, ie people who have (at least in the opinion of one Willis Beard) betrayed Ted Lasso – but who have also learned the error of their ways through the goodness of Ted’s gentle heart.

(Yes, yes, you might argue that Jamie’s insulting remarks about Ted in 1x10 is a reasonable reaction to what, from Jamie’s POV, looks like Ted unreasonably dumping him, but a, I’m not sure that Beard knows that, and b, I’m not sure that Beard cares about that. You might also argue that Nate and Jamie have both learned a lot of stuff from people other than Ted, but: see the a and b of the previous sentence. And anyway, this is Beard’s club and you don’t get a say in his absurd selection criteria.)

Beard doesn’t inform anyone of the club’s existence. That includes the other members, Nate and Jamie, who just suddenly finds themselves regularly invited out for drinks with the most mysterious man either of them have ever met.

There are a lot of weird but oddly good talks about feelings. There are silences neither Jamie nor Nate know what to do with. And then there’s the football strategy chatter, which unites them all in a wild and eager frenzy, and an unexpected but pleasant sense of shared understanding.

Nate think it’s nice that Beard wants to hang and he’s not one to look a gift horse in the mouth anyway, so he doesn’t question the set-up. Jamie generally assumes that given the choice anyone would always choose to hang with him always, so. He’ll indulge his coach. They have a shared love of trivia.

Eventually Beard learns of Rebecca’s early transgressions, and (secretely) inducts her into the secret club. Club meetings get a whole lot more interesting from there on out.

[montied]

Jack: Flustered™️

[ab-pimenta]

this is kind of dumb but I saw the post on tt a while ago and I couldn't not think about Alex and Nathan, sooooo

[hellofanidea]

curt has a crush on arthur 🎤🎤

This got away from me so badly, and it now is its own ficlet! It does get heavy during the latter part, however, so tw for alcoholism, PTSD, character death, and people being shitty to each other in the throes of those.

"Y'know Curt's got a thing for you?" Bucky grins at him one night, closer to five sheets to the wind than three, leaning into Arthur's space outside of the O Club.

There had been a few of them who wandered out initially, chasing fresh air to clear their soaked heads, but then the band had started up again and they had followed the music inside in search of dance partners. Arthur had expected Bucky to be first amongst them to go, but he had stayed when Arthur lingered under the night sky, and now he understands why.

"Not sure you're meant to say shit like that, Major," Arthur laughs, mostly out of shock at the way Bucky seems perfectly at ease with the idea. "Gonna get somebody a blue ticket home."

"Naw," Bucky scoffs, still smiling, though it's starting to look more like a leer. "Ain't runnin' to tell nobody. Just figured I'd try my hand at bein' a wingman."

He laughs at his own joke, swaying away and hiccuping drunkenly.

There's no need, Arthur wants to tell him; him and Curt have been slipping into dark corners together for a bit of stress relief for nearly two weeks now. He wonders if he pieced together Curt 'having a thing for him' from the newly charged air between them, or if Curt really had said something to him. Wonders what either of those could mean.

"You're a good friend," he tells Bucky instead, and means it. "You're also drunk as a skunk. C'mon, we should head back inside before you sober up enough to remember this in the mornin'."

Bucky makes a dismissive noise, but turns towards the door with him anyway.

"You're not gonna give me anything to take back to him? What kind of a wingman are you makin' me, Foster?" He complains.

"Well, considerin' I didn't try to punch yours or his lights out when you said somethin', a real lucky one, sir."

Several Years Later

"Y'know Curt's got a thing for you?" Bucky slurs, and Arthur feels his heart drop to his knees.

It's hot in the VA hall they've piled into for the reunion, and Bucky's been on fine form all night, to the point that some of the boys who didn't know him as Air Exec or CO or POW had been looking at him funny, and Arthur had to volunteer to take him outside for a moment. Let him cool his head in the relative privacy of the side alley. Catch his breath. Shiver off some of the burn of whiskey in his stomach.

And Arthur has been doing so well recently, but now he wants that same burn something fierce. He should go back inside, send Viv or Buck to take care of Bucky. Find Ev and get out of here before he follows Egan the way he always does eventually, and throws away three months of stone cold sobriety over the invocation of a ghost that he's never without anyway.

He doesn't go back inside. He stays next to where Bucky has his head tilted back to the sky, his eyes closed. Ignoring the tremble of his fingers, Arthur takes out a cigarette and lights it.

"Yeah, Bucky," he sighs around the filter. He doesn't have the energy to play along, or the heart to stop him.

"What, no joke about a blue ticket?" Bucky asks.

Irritation abruptly curdles in Arthur's stomach. He can't tell if Bucky's really back in Thorpe Abbotts in his mind, or if he's just trying to get a rise out of him. It reminds him, bitterly, of the Stalag. Bucky growling at him at him like a cornered animal, digging his fingers into Arthur's bruises; Arthur letting him, because at least it made him useful.

"I'm a civilian, now," he reminds Bucky. "Me 'n' Ev get caught it's jail, remember?"

The other man has the decency to look uncomfortable at the reminder, kissing his teeth unhappily. His closed eyes remain turned up to the pollution-hidden stars.

"Yeah. Forgot that." A heavy pause, and Arthur feels himself tense. Bucky's winding up for something, drawing his arm back to throw a curve ball. Definitely looking for a fight of some kind, and Arthur hasn't taken any of the bait so far, but he's come pretty close. "You 'n' Ev moved pretty fuckin' quickly. After Africa."

"Don't," Arthur snaps.

"I mean, I've heard the stories, you practically jumped him right there in the desert, right? Fucked him all the way up until you got yourself shot down. Wrote him fuckin' love letters from a Nazi prison camp, for fuck's sake." Bucky's eyes open. There's something dangerous in their piercing blue. "I bet Curt's body wasn't even cold when you jumped on his dick."

Arthur had never snapped at him in the Stalag, had taken his licks from Bucky like a good little soldier and kept on trotting after him. It had been worth it then just to feel the ache. Even more worth it for the times when Bucky wasn't at his lowest ebb and he would try to silently make it up to him.

Now, though? Arthur doesn't have that kind of patience left in him. Not even for Bucky, not when it's about Ev, about Curt, and not really about either of them at all, but about Bucky needing something he thinks he can only get by finding a sore spot and poking.

He has to know it's coming, but Bucky doesn't dodge when Arthur throws the punch. It's a good hit, or a bad one, something crunching under Arthur's fist in a way that instantly overrides the fury that had risen in him at Bucky's provocation. Bucky goes staggering, hands up at his face, and Arthur stares in horror at the aftermath of what he's done.

"Jesus, shit, Bucky, 'm sorry, 'm so sorry, are you alright?" He jabbers, frozen to the spot.

Just out of reach, Bucky sways. He's making grunts and groans as he seems to fight to stay upright. When one of his hands moves, red spills from between his fingers like wine, trickles down the backs of his hands, and drips onto his dress uniform. It's all over his tie. It'll stain, badly, and Arthur can't stop staring at it, even as Bucky straightens out and makes a throaty 'whoop' noise.

"Always knew you had a helluva swing on you, Foster," he laughs thickly.

His own blood is all over his lips, and he's still laughing, and there's too much happening at once, too many pasts layered together in Arthur's head. The smell of burning skin draws him from them, then the pain in his fist. Not just his knuckles; he had curled his hand tight around his still lit cigarette to throw the punch, and the end was now searing into his palm.

Finally, he drops it. If he lets it burn him a moment more than he needs to, that's between him and God and his ghosts.

[blazing-spectre]

Getting around to posting my new icon of Nathan :3c Love a guy with a single expression always🧡

[samgirard]

walk in: mackinnon | game four: col vs. sea | 4.24.23

[19871997]

u've sold me on natemaccmd. will be rotating it in my mind

i have more for u. kinda. in the avs no good very bad historically terrible season (2016-17) where they had the worst points percentage of any team in the salary cap era (sub .300) (and would hold that record until the 19-20 drw? i think) connor mcdavid won the hart, art ross, and ted lindsay becoming the youngest to sweep those awards since sidcros. sidney crosby, of course, would win his third stanley cup that season. connor mcdavid won his first hart before nathan mackinnon was ever even a finalist. but. natemac won the cup !

[moonfurthetemmie]

Happy Halloween!

I have no tribute to give, but I did just watch Repo! The Genetic Opera and unfortunately for all the fictional characters that I play with like dolls in my head, I have been given ideas for Gouge

[abluescarfonwaston]

Wait. Kotetsu and Barnaby were partners for four years. That makes Karina like. 20. She's probably already had to struggle though explaining to her friends why she wasn't studying for her college entrance exams. Pao-Lin is 16. She's about to hit her growth spurt. (And perhaps be disappointed when she's still left as the shortest after Lara. Who pops up like a weed a few months later.)

How. I feel like i missed so much. Did they go to Karina's graduation? Did Pao-Lin have an awful acne outbreak that Nathan helped her deal with? Did they gussy up Lara for her first homecoming dance with Pao-Lin in a suit only to be called into work at the last minute? Look at each other and laugh cause at least they don't have to explain why they can't stay?

[crow-talks-hockey]

Killing Strangers - A Colorado Avalanche Mob AU (Part Twenty-One)

Cale knew from the look in Nate’s eyes that he didn’t believe this, and he felt a small pang of guilt about it. He wouldn’t believe him either. But there hadn’t been any other way. Cale was going to need Nate to understand that. Cale wasn’t sure it would happen that way.

Cale reached forward, unspeaking, and Nate flinched. He flinched. Cale felt as though he’d been struck across the face. Nate’s eyes were glistening with tears. Everything around him was quiet. From the corner of his eye, he could see Bolts and Red Wings slowly backing away to retreat. Some looked like they wanted to fight back, but they’d all seen Stamkos’ blade. He’d broken the rules of a challenge, and Cale doubted he would be welcomed back easily had Cale not killed him. They’d strike back, he knew, but right now it didn’t matter. Nate was standing before him, hurt and alone.

Cale searched his gaze for any sense of recognition. “Nate, please—” he pleaded.

“You aren’t real, are you?” Nate asked, voice broken and upset.

[notwithaste]

What evidence do you have that it was me who broke into the bookshop?

MISS FISHER’S MURDER MYSTERIES 1x06 - Raisins and Almonds

[skrunksthatwunk]

ARMY OF THE DOOMSTAR KAIJU BATTLE?????????????

[figueroths]

now why did it take netflix literal months after canceling bastard son to give it a proper teaser when u scroll over the title like babes y’all could’ve done that and maybe promoted the show well before it released

[fallstaticexit]

Prev / Next / Beginning / Pillowfort

AN: As a heads up, I do not have anything scheduled for the rest of the week. I could post but I'll give a notice :) otherwise, we will return Monday 8-14 (if you know me, I probably won't even wait that long lolol)

Transcript under the cut

Nancy Narrates: [I never felt more terrified in my entire life. I could hardly look at him at first. I almost couldn’t bare to hold him, I thought I would break him]

Geoffrey: He’s beautiful. I can’t believe we made something so perfect.

Nancy: [voice wobbles] He’s so tiny... innocent. I don’t want to ruin him.

Geoffrey: You won’t. You’ll be an amazing mother.

Nancy: It’s not like I grew up with the best example of one. What if he hates me?

Geoffrey: Look at how he’s already looking at you. He’s 3 hours old and he’s looking at you like you’re the love of his life. You’ll be great, Nance. We’re going to love him together, our Zachary.

Nancy: I was thinking. I’d like to name him after my brother.

Geoffrey: Oh yeah? Nathan?

Nancy: [hums] Jonathan.

Geoffrey: [smiles] Jonathan Landgraab. I love it.

-

Geoffrey: Hello Mrs. Landgraab. Thank you for coming.

Queenie: I wouldn’t miss the birth of my first grandson. Chester, however, sends his regards; he had a last minute meeting with a client.

Queenie: My, he is stunning. He looks just like my Nathan.

Geoffrey: We’ve named him after him. His name is Jonathan.

Queenie: [softly] I see.

Queenie: [to herself] I’ll do right by you, Jonathan.

-

Nancy Narrates: [When I did look at him, I couldn’t stop. He was beautiful. I counted nearly every eyelash. I kissed every single little toe on each foot. I was mesmerized]

Nancy Narrates: [How did I create something so utterly perfect]

Nancy: [whispers] I don’t know what I’m doing, Jonathan but I’ll figure it out. Bare with me.

-

Nancy Narrates: [ Turns out, I had alot to learn. Motherhood did not come to me as easily as fatherhood did to Geoffrey]

Nancy Narrates: [Jonathan was always regarding me so curiously, and I him. I’ve never interacted with children until I had one of my own. I hardly knew how to talk to them]

Nancy: Oh. Hello. So, what would you add to this lobby to make it look less sterile?

Jonathan: [coos]

Nancy: Natural materials? What are we thinking, wood or stone?

Jonathan: [gurgles]

Nancy: Can I tell you a secret? Your grandmother drives me crazy. Can you believe she mocked my blueprints in front of the entire department? What would she know anyway, she went to school for journalism for fuc- for flip sake.

Jonathan: [babbles wildly]

Nancy: [scoffs] Exactly!

Nancy: Goodness, you’re greedy. You’re like your father. You’re actually a lot like him. You’re sweet; you’re silly. You’re nothing like me, are you? That’s a good thing. I want you to be more like Geoffrey. That’s your father’s name, by the way. I don’t know if you knew that.

Nancy Narrates: [When it came to fatherhood, Geoffrey was a natural]

-

Nancy Narrates: [They were made for each other]

Nancy Narrates: [And began to feel softer every time I looked at them]

Nancy: What did I say about dressing him?

Geoffrey: Heh. Don’t. Don’t dress him.

Nancy: Exactly. He can’t go with my mother dressed like this. I’ll never hear the end of it.

Geoffrey: But he looks so cute.

Nancy: He does but that’s besides that point.

Nancy Narrates: [I was smitten. Everything felt perfect just the way it was. This was certainly the life I signed up for-]

Nancy: [retching, coughing]

Jonathan: Mommy?

Geoffrey: Yeah bud, sounds like Mommy’s not feeling too good. Hey, Nancy? Are you ok in there?

Jonathan: Mommy kay?

Nancy: Oh, for the love for fucking-

Nancy: GOD!!

Nancy: RAAHH! If you get me pregnant again I will kill you, Geoffrey! I swear to god I’ll kill you!

Geoffrey: [nervous chuckles] No Nancy Jr. then, huh?

Nancy: Shut up, shut up, shut up!!

Nancy Narrates: [And before I knew it, we were a family of 4]

Malcolm: [wails]

Nancy: What’s wrong? Why is he still crying?

Queenie: Well, he’s certainly your son, Nancy. You drove your father and I mad with your colicky cries.

Nancy: I did this to him?

Geoffrey: [softly] No, someone’s just having a rough time adjusting to the outside world, that’s all. Hey, Malcolm! It’s mommy and daddy! Your big brother is here! You two are going to be the best of pals, I just know it.

Nancy: Look, Jonathan. This is your brother, Malcolm.

Jonathan: Ew!

Geoffrey: [chuckles] He’s not ew, son. He’s a baby. He’s just a little fussy right now.

Nancy: Do you really think we can handle two children under 2 years old?

Geoffrey: Hey, if there’s anyone who can do it, it’s us. It’s me and you.

Nancy: [sighs] Ok. Me and you.

Jonathan: [screeching] EW!

Malcolm: [screams]

Nancy: Geoffrey do something!!

Geoffrey: Oh! Oh, damn it- Hey! That’s enough!

[basu-shokikita]

About Depths of Humanity

So, I talked about The Duel some time back and I thought, why not do the same for this song too? It's actually one of my underrated faves from Doomstar Requiem.

This more of a rant than a strict analysis though, I just really enjoy thinking about the implications of this song and what it means in regard to Skwisgaar.

Let's start with Ishnifus' warning. He claims that inside lies danger, the ghosts of their pasts and their fears. He cautions them to stay alert and Dethklok brave forward, even if scared.

Inside, they encounter their old manager, old groupies and Skwisgaar's old guitar teacher, in that order. As promised by Ishnifus', they're all people from their past, coming back to haunt them.

Immediately, these people start recriminating Dethklok for not having paid them back after how much they helped them. In short, they're jealous of Dethklok's fame and money.

The band is clearly affected by the plaints, quickly forgetting what they were here to do. Except Skwisgaar, who reminds them all they have to find clues about Toki's whereabouts. It does not seem like they're listening to him, though.

Now up to here, I want to point out 2 things:

That Nathan and Pickles seem the most upset by these confrontations.

That, while Skwisgaar is disturbed, he still has their goal in mind.

About Nathan and Pickles, I think it makes sense, they are the leaders of the band, they're most conscious of its tremendous success. They also know they're extremely talented musicians, meaning, they're aware of their value. They know they're far from being these miserable pricks demanding rewards. Nathan had a nurturing family while Pickles used to be in a huge band, previously to Dethklok. They're both people that have been inherently helped by other people, which is why being confronted is actually uncomfortable.

Skwisgaar is certainly a different case. I have to say, I was pretty surprised to find out that he had a guitar teacher. Based on the flashbacks in Fatherklok, I assumed he had been self taught. Skwisgaar himself has admitted he was pretty poor in his childhood so it's hard to believe Servetta would've invested in his music education. Plus, he can't read music which I think would be hardly the case if he had gotten classes.

But anyway, I'll play along. This teacher is speaking English and he doesn't make any mistakes so I'm guessing he's american. Meaning, Skwisgaar took classes when he went to America, which was later in his life. To strengthen his game and/or learn the technical bits he might have missed before? Maybe? And if this was the case, then Skwisgaar would've felt less obligated to indulge to other people in his life, when he learned to be independent from a really young age. He doesn't feel like he owes shit to other people, because other people didn't give him shit. Thus, the Depths of Humanity effect is not that strong in him.

You could also argue that the loss of Toki is a far more terrifying prospect than these bitter acquaintances from their past but I'll elaborate on that further in this post.

Murderface? Well, Murderface has low esteem and is the less popular member in the band, so of course he can't fall victim to guilt-tripping. Because that would mean acknowledging he feels like he's in a better place than others, it would mean that he actually believes himself superior than others. But he doesn't, Murderface is convinced he's worth nothing, so this whole charade is more grating than anything. Which brings us to the next moment.

The way Murderface is coaxed by the Depths of Humanity crew, is when a seemingly fan approaches him and starts praising him, claiming he's the best one. And then, is when Murderface is hypnotized by the attention. He's already such a negative person, of course more negativity isn't going to get to him. But positivism? That's another deal.

Skwisgaar once again insists that they have to find a clue on how to find Toki but it falls on deaf ears. Nathan is grabbing his head in despair while Pickles clutches his chest in what seems to be an impending panic attack.

Now I really like the wording 'I'll look if you do, too' from Skwisgaar. It almost feels like, even in this situation, he's trying to sound cool about it. He doesn't want to be the only one caring this much about Toki, he doesn't want to be the one leading this operation. He's not a leader, he's never been a leader, even less when it comes to emotional stuff, which is the implicit purpose of this search. They care about Toki, and that's why they're looking for him. But is Skwisgaar seems to be unconsciously rejecting this fact. This attachment.

However, his bandmates aren't listening, too self-absorbed in their anguish to do so. Skwisgaar continues the search and is quick to point out at something on the wall. It's a flyer that he grabs and, immediately, seems to connect the dots about. In an unusual display of leadership, he tells Nathan to grab Murderface so they can leave. Their purpose has been fulfilled and they can finally escape this horrid place.

Okay, so this is my favorite bit, obviously. Once they're outside, Nathan and Pickles keep complaining about what they were just subjected to, and Skwisgaar stops them to show his discovery. It's the same flyer he just grabbed, and it features the place where Toki had his audition. Also known as the place where they all met Toki for the first time and Skwisgaar and him had the legendary duel.

We don't have a precise Dethklok timeline but it's been a long time since Toki joined the band. Several years, at the very least. And this building is nothing but a far away memory, from when they were a lesser band. From when they weren't the big rockstars they are now. So, it really begs to question that not only did Skwisgaar remember the place, but he did so at once, when he hadn't seen or heard of it in years.

...Unless, he had been thinking about it recently?

We know, thanks to the beautiful central section of the movie, that Toki had been thinking of his audition, of joining Dethklok, as a means to cope with the devastating reality he was faced with. We know reminiscing of his dazzling battle with Skwisgaar and the happiness he found within the band gave Toki strength to carry on. But what about Skwisgaar?

For someone who considered himself much better than other guitarists, to the point he didn't want to play with another one, to actually find an equal, someone that challenged him, it couldn't have been anything short of extraordinary for Skwisgaar.

The summit is for the very best only, yet it's quite lonely too, and Skwisgaar had been basking in that isolation his whole life. Until he played with Toki, then the idea of sharing his field no longer felt like an insult, but potential instead. He found someone that could improve his own playing, someone that could compliment his guitar, take it to even higher heights.

And so, Skwisgaar was the one to invite Toki to the band, more specifically, to tell him he wanted him in the band. While we can't factually know how the rest of the members joined Dethklok, we know for sure that Skwisgaar was the sole responsible for making Toki join, as the rest were already bidding him farewell for failing to keep up with Skwisgaar.

So, when the one person that challenged Skwisgaar's playing was taken away, it wouldn't be a stretch for Skwisgaar to look back on how it all happened. To ponder about the circumstances that lead them to the current situation. It's clear the whole band loves Toki and, unable to deal with their own sadness, drank and fucked to oblivion. This also applies to Skwisgaar, except that with him it's especially complex, given that he's the one that brought Toki to his world to begin with. Given that Toki and Skwisgaar share the same instrument. (Fun fact: you don't actually see Skwisgaar fiddling with his guitar in Doomstar Requiem, just puttings dat out theres.)

Obviously, this is a bunch of mumbo-jumbo but as any Pepe-Silvia-scene impersonator that respects themselves, I want to point out how interesting of a coincidence it is that, less than 2 songs later, Skwisgaar is saying this:

Right before they head in to rescue Toki and Abigail, Skwisgaar imparts some reflection of his. He's been wondering if maybe it wouldn't be better to go back to being a one-guitar band. Toki has been in Dethklok for a long time now, so it's interesting Skwisgaar has been thinking about this...

...Except, that's exactly what his mentality used to be like, before meeting Toki. Right when he was trying to convince Pickles that they didn't need a rhythm guitar, he spoke these words exactly. One-guitar band.

It's almost like Skwisgaar is trying to do some self-preservation by returning to his aloof roots. He made Toki join the band, now Toki's gone and in danger, and maybe this wouldn't have happened if they had stuck with Skwisgaar's original plan. Because they attempted to replace Magnus is why this came to be. The revenge Magnus promised did arrive.

I just wanna be clear. I don't think Skwisgaar believes he's the sole to responsible for this, I'm sure he knows Magnus is the main perpetrator here. But the facts remain the facts, and had they all stayed as they were, then they wouldn't be risking their lives now to save their fifth member.

Like this, it seems entirely logical that Skwisgaar would be thinking of his former reluctance, of the Duel, of everything. It's all fresh in his mind once again, because Toki's kidnapping has forced him to realize they're not actually untouchable. Their mortality is back on the table, and so are their bonds.

In short, Skwisgaar had been repressing all his emotions about Toki's disappearance, but from the Depths of Humanity onward, he can't help but show them. He can't help but admit to himself and others, that he wants Toki back. So much, that a bunch of angry and entitled people can't affect him enough to forget it. So much that it's making him remember how distant he used to be, before Toki. So much that it's making him realize how different he is now.