#anyway i LOVE writing comments as a separate thing from being a writer and it is a different skill that readers can (and should) learn

[kshaar]

sorry but i do believe that it's normal to want AND possible to achieve a good grade in comment writing

[onyourowndaisymae]

Yoo I have two request which I’ll send the other one separately but I am in an ANGSTY mood rn sooo yah also been binging ur headcanons and stuffs and I just love the way you write ?? It’s so entertaining lol

AnywY the actual request: can you write like a one shot or headcanons if you prefer of mc who is struggling after the belphie incident ?? Like they feel like they’ve mostly forgiven him and can act normally around him and they’re friends and take naps together but sometimes the flash back just HITS THEM and they have nightmares and panic attacks that can be so bad sometimes someone needs to get Simeon to calm them down. Maybe something of how the brothers react/treat mc and belphie? Idk I’m just thirsting for like MEGA ANGST rn bc my dad made me cry little bit lmao 😭

it comes at night

hello anon! i'm terribly sorry you're in such an angsty mood, though i thank you for all the love-- and for sending this request right as these ideas were on the front of my mind. it genuinely makes me so happy to see people enjoying my work, and it makes all the writer's block and such worth it. i cannot express enough how much i love seeing all the comments, reblogs, etc. as people engage with my work.

anyways. i'm not sure how i feel about this piece, especially with how LONG it ended up being, but maybe that's just my mushy brain talking after looking at it too long. regardless-- i hope you enjoy (well, y'know, in like a sad and angsty way).

synopsis: you thought you would be able to move on like all the others. your body was healed, your anxiety tucked neatly behind a mental wall built to keep you safe. yet something in you was stuck. you couldn't just move on. you were trapped in a battle between your friendship with belphegor and the fear gnawing at your brain as you remembered what exactly he did to you. when the dam finally breaks, your whole brain floods with terror, until you're swept away with it. nobody can save you now.

genre: angst, no happy end, just a big ol spoonful of sadness

word count: ~3.1k

content warnings: chapter 16 spoilers, graphic(?) discussions of death, depictions of panic attacks, nightmares, mc progressively getting worse from fear + lack of sleep

it's funny how time works. 

you'd been around your fair share of years. you’d grown, you’d changed, you’d spent your entire life looking toward the future you had planned. then you, a mere human, were yanked into an unfamiliar world. you spent an entire year in the devildom– a year that simultaneously dragged on and flew by– and came out the other side a new person. a single year in the devildom has changed you more than the human realm has your entire life. time was a mischievous thing, always leaving you chasing behind in a fruitless pursuit of something you’ll never quite understand.

but, she also brings blessings with her. they say that time heals all wounds. you've always agreed with that sentiment. scraped knees and adolescent broken hearts are swept away with the passing days, trailing further and further behind you until one day you forget to look back and remember them. the pain scribbled down on diary pages or cried into pillow cases no longer stings like a fresh burn. these things are nothing but scars now. time has a special way of patching you up, of rubbing your back until the tears clear up and you can finally see again. that is how it's always been. 

where is time when you need it? 

she hasn't quite abandoned you, this much is true. cuts and bruises heal over the passing days. your hair and nails still grow. your body still changes, slowly but surely, marching onwards week after week. yet your mind is trapped in stasis. you struggle to break free, but at times the rot consumes you whole, until you’re crying under the covers and begging from respite from the memories. 

on the worst nights, you find yourself in the attic again, watching the door between you and belphegor swing open. you watch yourself march towards death.

you can still feel his hands around your neck, digging his claws into your fragile human skin like you're made of sand. the scent of blood-- your own blood, on the floors, on the walls, leaking from your torso and staining your clothes a permanent maroon-- still clings to the inside of your nose. even your wildest dreams could not erase the sight of his smug grin, the way his eyes lit up looking at your battered body.

no one person should have to carry the weight of realizing they're going to die. that's what you thought about when your body hit the bottom of the stairs, when belphegor tossed you down from the attic with a harsh laugh and punted your limp body into the entrance hall. you thought about how unfair this all was. you were just trying to help. you thought you were doing the right thing.

one of the worst parts of your untimely demise was watching the others react. the voices pool together in your head, like the colors of the rainbow twisting together on the surface of an oil spill. asmo's panicked shriek blends into satan's angry shouts, desperate to understand what's going on. lucifer's yelling almost drowns out the fearful cries coming from levi, held back by a very silent beel. 

but above all of that, you remember mammon. your first man, the first demon who took a chance on the defenseless little human, rushing to your side and gathering you in his arms like you were about to break. his hand on the side of your face, the tears streaming down his face, the shaky, desperate voice assuring you that you'll be okay and begging you to hang on, okay? please don't leave me. you can't remember if he was shaking or if it was your body's last ditch effort to stay conscious-- maybe both. your trembling fingers intertwined with his. words came out of your mouth, and you're not sure what exactly you said, but he only cried harder in response. 

and then, as your eyes shut for the final time, you woke at the bottom of the attic stairs. you had cheated death. 

your price? you had to carry the memories. 

the world kept spinning. days passed in the devildom. you returned to school, kept on top of your homework, spent your days in the house of lamentation alongside the seven demon brothers. you even got to know belphegor as he navigated his return home. he quickly grew fond of you. that, in and of itself, was jarring. but you returned each and every smile with one of your own. his actions were rooted in his own grief for his sister, you knew, and for that you could not fault him. you helped him repair the severed relationships between him and his elder siblings, stitching the family back together like a prized quilt until the seams of betrayal were sufficiently hidden. 

time is a traitorous bitch. why did she choose now to leave your wounds bare and bleeding?

everyone moved on but you. everyone got to wake up in the mornings without a nagging anxiety holding them back. the others could hang out with belphegor day in and day out without a growing feeling of dread popping up when you think you're safe. 

he killed you. he was grieving. your blood drenched the entryway floors as he laughed. he has grown. you watched the light leave mammon's eyes as you slipped away. belphie has been nothing but kind to you since that day. you fucking died. 

you wish your mind could pick a side. did you forgive him, or did you resent him? was he your friend, or your killer? these answers evaded you in the dead of night as you struggled to sleep again. it was becoming more common for you to lose hours of rest to these nagging fears. who are you? are you even you anymore? did the switch in timelines scatter your atoms across countless universes, leaving the you that looks back at you in the mirror nothing more than a hollow shell? 

you thought that you could keep your mind on a tight leash, keep your cards close to your chest as you continued to live with the brothers. you were wrong.

the first meltdown came during a nap with belphie. you had grown to trust him-- you thought you trusted him-- enough to sleep around him. he'd coax you every so often into an afternoon nap. always in the light of day, always your choice. and for many afternoons, you were perfectly content with this arrangement. belphie was warm and cuddly, a perfect companion for a lazy afternoon. he had this way of making you feel safe as you slept-- the nightmares couldn't come when he was snuggled up next to you, when you were sure his actions were ones of affection and not another trick to gain your trust.

one afternoon, while the sun was beginning to set, you stirred under the warmth of the blankets. the body next to yours lingered close, steady breaths lulling you back to dreamland. you could stay like this forever, you thought.

and then you felt it. the gentle graze of a familiar cow tail against your skin.

something inside of you, a dam you didn't even know was there, snapped. a hot flash of panic rose up your throat as your whole body jerked away from the feeling. your eyes shot open and you found yourself in the last place you needed to be right now: the attic. you pulled yourself out of bed before your brain could catch up. colors flashed across your vision as a consequence. you whipped around, disoriented and upset, and spotted a sleeping belphie in the bed where you once were.

a sleeping, demon belphie.

the familiar curve of his horns made your throat spasm as you tried to breathe. the colors flashed in your vision again-- oh god, what a terrible time to be left defenseless-- as your brain tried to drag you back to that day. you could practically see his face shift from relief to malicious, insidious joy as he began to attack you.

"hehe... does it hurt? finding it hard to breathe? i'm sure it must be very unpleasant."

please. please no.

" i have to say, seeing a human face twisted in pain like this... why, it's so much fun that i can barely stand it! i... i can't contain the laughter!"

you weren't quite sure when you hit the ground, but it was loud enough to wake belphegor from his slumber. he peeled his body off the mattress, slow and dazed, as he looked for you.

"mc? what're you... what's going on?"

please don't. this can't be happening.

your lungs collapsed from the weight of your own panic. you gasped-- once, twice, as your vision went in and out. were you bleeding? your hand loosely brushed at the front of your clothes, but couldn't process whether that was blood or your vivid imagination. were you even breathing? your head felt light and heavy at the same time. the wires in your brain were all crossed, sending both resuscitation and shutdown signals to each part of your body. this feeling... this was too familiar.

were you dying?

"mc, what's going on?"

you came face to face with belphegor. your friend, your killer. the demon who had lured you up to this very attic to kill you, now gripping your shoulders as interrogated you inches from your face.

you screamed. you screamed until your brain shut off completely, leaving you in an inky pit of darkness as your consciousness slipped away.

the house was in disarray for several days. apparently, lucifer came in shortly after you passed out, mammon at his heels, to save the day. you woke up later in his bed, the room cold and empty, with a throbbing head and a tear stained pillow. you stumbled out into his office to find him at his desk, lost in some paperwork like always. the solemn look he gave you as your eyes met told you everything you needed to know.

from this day forth, your fear was now your constant companion.

nobody in the house of lamentation knew how to move forward. not you, not the brothers, not the widening gap growing between you all with each passing day spent in emotional limbo. finally, lucifer called everyone to a family meeting where, over the course of an hour or two, everyone came to an agreement to acknowledge what had happened and why, promised to be mindful of this trauma that you're carrying, and move forward like you requested.

silent days slowly but surely filled back up with laughter again. the brothers came back to your side at their own pace-- asmo first, within a matter of hours, then mammon shortly after, then the others in the following days.

belphegor was the last to come around. his silence spoke volumes about his guilt. he had no clue how to comfort you. he'd do anything to repent for his actions. yet that was the way that life worked, didn't it? some actions simply cannot be undone.

but you didn't let that stop you. despite the panic that closed your throat every time you saw him for the next month, you slowly earned his friendship again. you assured him that the attic incident was a one time thing, the remnants of a lost nightmare blending into your consciousness as you awoke.

until it wasn't a one time thing.

the nightmares crept up on you. the first one happened, of course, that same night, as you thrashed and wept into lucifer's pillows. then a week later, another. a week and a half after that, another. the frequency eventually became higher and higher, until you started planning your sleep schedule (or lack thereof) around your new insomniac tendencies. but even you couldn't manage to stay awake forever.

on a bad night, you'd wake up in tears, crying weakly to yourself as you tried to coax yourself back to bed. on worse nights, you'd shoot up out of bed, limbs tingling in fear, opting to spend the rest of the night in the common room until the others woke for the day. on the worst night, you finally broke. you shattered worse than you could have imagined.

you finally collapsed into bed, body shutting down after a three days of minimal sleep. you were starting to get shaky from the lack of rest, and your lack of appetite was upsetting the others. you crawled under the covers and let your brain slip out of your hands and off to dreamland.

what a fool you were to think you'd get by without nightmares.

visions of demonic teeth tearing at your flesh filled your head. you tried to run away, tried desperately to wake yourself up, but their claws sunk into your flesh. the pain was vivid, was real. memories of your death lived underneath your skin, ready to resurface in the dark of night when there was no escape. you fought back as best you could, kicking and screaming and trying to run, but you were no match for the supernatural strength of your demons. you eventually gave in, an act of learned helplessness, and surrendered yourself to your worst nightmares.

you woke up choking on your own tears. heaving, gasping breaths tried to save you, mixing with coughs as your body struggled to hang on. the tears finally gave way to the memories-- hot blood dripping from your torso, screaming faces begging you to stay, your head going fuzzy as your vision followed--and your screams escaped without a fight.

a mixed cacophony of voices came flooding in the room. you'd be touched by the gesture, seeking comfort in the arms of your dearest friends, if your brain hadn't reminded you that they were demons as well. nightmarish beasts with fangs and claws, predators built to rip your soft flesh from your bones and leave you to die like roadkill.

you felt a hand on your shoulder. who's was it? you could not tell. your first and only instinct was to scream for mercy, hot tears streaming down your face as mammon's hurt expression moved back out of your line of sight. your chest heaved with effort. it felt like your whole body was caving in on itself. you didn't even realize you were shaking as you curled your body into a ball. your side hit the mattress with a pathetic thud and you wept, bitter and fearful, as a panic attack kept you trapped in its grip.

you don't know how long you stayed curled up like that, wordless cries echoing from your room and into the hallway, but eventually the sound of approaching footsteps caught enough of your attention to forget the panic, even if just for a moment.

"hey, it's okay," a familiar, comforting voice approached, cutting through the fear like a moonlight on a stormy night. "mc, it's me, it's simeon. it's going to be okay."

you felt the bed shift under the weight of someone sitting down, and you blindly threw your body at the person before checking to see if it was really him. it took you a few moments to raise your head, and when you did, you saw him: simeon, your angel, blue eyes full of worry as he met your gaze.

you cried in his arms until you fell into a fitful, dreamless sleep.

the next morning was miserable, to say the least. breakfast was tense. they all watched you like a hawk, like you were a powder keg about to explode with one wrong move. you couldn't blame them. you were afraid of your own emotions, and on some level, you were afraid of them. your trauma was making you afraid of the very people you cared about the most. these brothers had welcomed you into their home, took care of you as you adjusted to life in the devildom, and yet you couldn't hold eye contact without breaking in to a cold sweat.

the only person who did not watch you was belphegor. he was nowhere to be found during breakfast, nor dinner, nor breakfast the following day. you tried to seek him out, but somehow the avatar of sloth had become a skilled sneak in his silence.

you finally caught him alone on day four of radio silence. you both had stayed home without realizing the other had also skipped school that day-- you, from the lack of sleep eating at your brain, and belphegor, with his usual routine of missing class to nap at the house of lamentation. he was curled up on the couch in the common room, basking in the warmth of the fireplace in his slumber. you decided to wait for him to wake up. you sat down on the couch opposite of the one where he rested and watched him, quietly, like he'd disappear if you dared to blink.

creepy? yes. but your brain was long ruined by sleep deprivation and gnawing anxiety to worry about such trivial things.

when he finally stirred, you gently called belphegor's name. he took a moment to finally look at the source of the voice, but when he did, his body froze as the two of you made eye contact. a few moments passed in silence. finally, he sat up and began to make a move to leave.

"wait."

he stopped, but his gaze did not meet yours. you rose from your seat and joined him on the couch. the youngest pulled his legs in, twisting his body into a defensive little ball, and countered your next sentence before you could even open your mouth.

"you shouldn't be here with me."

"i think i'm old enough to make decisions for myself."

he shifted uncomfortably in the silence. you spoke again.

"i miss you. and i'm sorry."

he scoffed to himself and stared at the fireplace. "don't know why you think you should be apologizing to me. i'm the one that's the problem."

"you're not a problem, belphie. i never meant to make you feel like one."

every hair on your body stood on end. your hands trembled against your wishes, so you sat on them to stay focused. you had to do this. you had to keep moving forward.

"i hurt you, mc. you're afraid i'm going to do it again."

you sighed-- it came out more shaky than you would have liked-- and looked down. how had it come to this? how had someone you'd grown to hold so dear become a stranger again?

"i don't want to stop being friends. i don't like when you avoid me."

"you still get nightmares, don't you?"

you pause. his icy gaze on the side of your head sent you into a cold sweat.

you smiled-- it felt more like a grimace, personally-- and prayed it didn't come across insincere. your fingers carefully intertwined with his. he met your gaze. you were thankful he couldn't see the way your chest tightened when you made eye contact. 

"i'm okay, belphie," you lied. 

this fear was going to be the death of you. 

[luninosity]

It’s funny, I’d actually been putting off making this post, even though of course I’m thrilled at the book release and seeing Sam and Leo get their happy ending! But it comes with a lot of feelings.

But, first – yes, In Focus is out now! As of last weekend, from JMS Books! Book two of two, of the Character Study duology – in which supporting actor Leo and photographer Sam meet each other’s families (including Benvolio the cat!), and navigate press tours and coming out, and help their friends when a crisis happens, and find their happy ending!

It’s got a lot of emotions because it’s really the last story in the whole Character Bleed universe (as far as I know, anyway) – the original Colby/Jason trilogy, all the bonus stories, and this spin-off because Leo demanded his own book…I’ve had these characters living in my head and being excitedly loud in my writer-brain for so many years. They’re friends. I’ve written little crossovers with some of my favorite other characters – with Colby and Jason meeting Ben and Simon, who were the main characters from my first-even published M/M story, years ago! (That was “Leather & Tea,” if you’re wondering, and the crossover stories are “Coffee & Tea” and “Coffee & Tea: Epilogue,” which is, er, quite spicy!) That felt like such a full-circle moment – it was lovely.

And it’s so odd thinking that this is really it. (Okay, technically my story for the JMS Books holiday advent calendar this year is in the Character Bleed universe! But it’s a one-shot with all new characters – they might go on a date to see a Colby Kent film, but there’s no real crossover!) And I know it is the end – we’ve left everyone in a wonderful happy place, and the characters aren’t metaphorically tugging on my sleeve and popping up with a new idea about home renovation or baking contests, not anymore. I suspect that’s how my head knows it’s probably time for the next thing. (Yep, I’ve got some Ideas. Probably more in the fantasy realm…there’s the Apprentice’s Luck sequel, and story about Lorre’s daughter, and the next Aric/Em short story, and the third Regency Magicians book with @thebestpersonherelovesbucky, among said ideas…)

But this is still the biggest story I’ve ever written, counting all those books and bonus stories, and it’s been so much a part of me – it’s the story I’ve done the most outlining for (ever!), had random ideas for whilst driving home from campus, got the Good Sex Award runner-up nod for, looked up historical ship parts for, thought up terrible bread puns for…I’m so very very proud of it. I loaf it.

Thanks for reading. Thanks for sharing Colby and Jason and Leo and Sam with me. Thank you for the conversations in comments, and for the fan art and fan fic and fan trailer for Steadfast-the-movie – it’s a delight and a joy and an honor to see people making awesome things, creative things, because you love these characters too.

(Y’know, it’s also funny – I realized how many tropes I wrote into this book that I don’t normally write! It’s a coming out story, there’re kids around in the form of Sam’s sisters – well, teens, but still – there’s [sort of] a third-act breakup, or at least a needing some space, for good reasons, mind you, and it doesn’t really last that long…but all of that is just really what this story wanted to be! Of course Leo would have to be dramatic and unusual. Of course.)

So I hope you enjoy In Focus! It’s also got rather more fish and seahorse references than I expected. But everyone needs a rainbow crystal fish comfort object once in a while…

Oh, and this book also has one of my favorite playlists! I do usually have a plan for those, some more than others, and this one just…every song fits so well. I’ll probably make a separate post commenting on some of those choices, sometime, but I did start this playlist off with one of my very favorite songs (at least top five, maybe top two), which I’d been saving for the right story, and it felt right here for Sam and Leo, celebratory and tentative and determined and hopeful and full of explorations, all at once – that’s “Aside” by The Weakerthans:

…and I’m leaning on this broken fence Between past and present tense And I’m losing all those stupid games That I swore I’d never play But it almost feels okay

Circumnavigate this body Of wonder and uncertainty Armed with every precious failure And amateur cartography…

(and yes, if you know me from Stucky fandom circles, you might know which other fic I've used that song in! it's also a story I have a lot of Feels about. <3 )

[jumpywhumpywriter]

I don’t know how to start messages at all, so I’ll just get to the point: you’re writing is hecking amazing. I literally only just discovered your blog and I’m already hooked and invested in like 5 different stories. As people say, I want to consume your writing the way a wolf tears apart the innards of its prey (hope that’s not too weird of a compliment; I mean that the writing is very good. I’m not good at expressing extreme amazement and stuff through writing at all and general social awkwardness so sorry if I’m coming off as weird, I don’t mean to).

I have more things to say/ask (like how you write so fast cause the heck? That’s a compliment by the way), but I don’t want to be rude or annoying. Anyways, I hope you’re having a good day/night and are staying hydrated and enjoying some cookies (or whatever your favorite food is) while you do writing stuff (or school or whatever. Idk anything about your life. I’ll stop talking now before I go on another tangent like right now) :)

This is literally one of the sweetest compliments I've EVER gotten! I love the analogy with the wolf tearing out the insides of its prey, that gave me a good laugh and made me smile LOL. It's not weird at all! (At least, not in MY world, because 'weird' is my version of 'normal'. You can't out-weird me haha) and I'm super socially awkward too so I totally understand how you feel!

I absolutely adore the fact that you took the time to send this to me! It really helps motivate me to keep writing! I honestly wouldn't post here very often without comments like yours to keep me going.

On to answering your questions now. This is going to be a long one.

Firstly, I have a terrible relationship with sleep. Sleep hates me. So my solution? Stay up to 3am writing giant novels! Some nights the inspiration hits out of nowhere, and I'll write like a crazy person on their 10th cup of coffee, doing five whole pages in Google Docs. Like I don't know what sleep is anymore LOL. Then I break the large chunk of writing I did up into several smaller sections I can put into separate posts on this app that I can post slowly over time to keep people entertained for a longer time instead of posting everything all at once and running out of content.

For example, I might literally have 13 posts in my drafts section ALL from a single batch of writing I did all at once the night before that took me 5 whole hours to write and edit.

In all honestly I am NOT a fast writer at all. I just happen to be able to write giant sections at a time and then split them up so I can post frequently which gives the ILLUSION that I am fast writer because of how often I post content. But in reality it's just been prepared in advance on my sleepless nights where I power through and complete whole pages at a time. (I'm actually a slower snail when it comes to writing because I try to go for quality not quantity -- I take my time to make stories interesting vs just writing as long as I can)

It's convenient too because some days I don't have the inspiration at all/experience writer's block so I can just post content I made over the previous few nights instead to make up for not writing anything new that day.

I also have ADHD which makes it so I can hyperfocus on writing for several hours at a time without a break. Sometimes I'll get really deep into a story where I just can't put down my phone and stop writing to go to sleep.

Thanks again for your WONDERFUL ask! It made my whole day (or night in this case, ironically because that's what it is right now for me as I'm answering this LOL -- proving my point about no sleep 😅😅)

Keep being awesome my new fan!! 🥰 And hope you enjoy more of my stories!

[amaranthinespirit]

— guidelines and boundaries

a list of guidelines and boundaries for requesting and interacting on my blog!

— nsfw this is a nsfw blog. that being said, i do not necessarily have a massive problem with minors interacting in some cases. I ask that any minors don't interact on the nsfw posts (such as commenting), but i don't see a problem on ones that are sfw. I can't stop them from consuming the media i post, it's up to them and their parents to monitor their media consumption. my content has not reached that necessarily dark point yet, and it might not ever, however it is still 18+ i can write outside of nsfw if anyone requests, or is interested in it, but as of late, it is mostly nsfw content featured on my blog.

— characters assuming you've taken a peek at what's posted on my blog, you'll see that it's primarily simon riley, but i am not opposed to any other call of duty characters! feel free to ask!

— requests and asks are open closed feel free to send a request about any cod character with what you want me to write about! please be as specific as possible because then it helps me understand what you're wanting, and it increases the chances of making it out of the inbox (unless stated creative freedom!) and for those who don't want to send requests and just chat, please do! feel free to ask questions, start conversations, etc. <3

— emoji anons i am not opposed to anyone who wants to become an emoji anon! just send an ask with the emoji, and whenever one gets taken, i'll list it here <3

— for requests: my blog mainly focuses on writing fem readers because that's just what i do best! with more practice, i'm sure i could write it, but as of late, there are other blogs who do it best so i'll leave it to them. i'm open to writing a lot, so if you're unsure about what is okay or not, just request it anyways! as long as it's not listed below as a hard no!

— boundaries 1. there are certain things i will absolutely never write for, which are as listed here: scat, pedophilia, underage, necrophilia, beastiality, zoophilia, ageplay, race play, pet play, incest, rape (cnc is fine, nc is iffy), etc. (list is subject to additions if i see fit. just because you don't see it on here, doesn't mean i'll write it. feel free to send an ask about it, i'm always okay with clarifying!) 2. if you haven't seen your request or ask, please don't spam! i like to pick and choose which ones to do first depending on my mood, how easy it is, and what ideas i can get from it that feed my motivation. i am also writing for an entire other blog, though not as frequently as this one, i am quite busy! 3. If i don't do a request, it will just be deleted from my inbox! 4. feel free to message me whenever! i'm always open to talk to people, but if it's speed along your request, i ask that you just don't do this! i will get to it whenever i can! if i rejected your request, and you'd like to know, we can always discuss further details and workarounds!

— p!links i am open to receiving them! it's definitely something i'd like to write around, and i am open to receiving any p!links from people. i just ask they come from twitter/x, and that it's nothing extremely graphic/gore!

— reblogging i don't typically reblog because i like to keep my page mostly my writing, but i know some people have a separate blog where they do reblog content. i think that's what i'll do in the future because i see a lot of content that i really like and think about reblogging all the time! and right now, all of my likes and comments show up as my main @amaranthineghost because this blog is under the same account so i think it'd be cool to have a reblog account.

— mutuals i'd love to have cod mutuals! if you want to be mutuals, you can just ask! for other writers, there may be a chance i already follow you 🫶🏻

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

“yes, other writers who have smaller blogs would love to have more comments on their fics, but they too would feel annoyed if all the comments they were getting were 'Part 2???'”

OMG YES! i love it when people comment on my fics like so so much but a lot of the times there’s at least a few ‘part 2??’ type of comments. (also a lot of the time the asking for a part 2 is the only engagement they give) while im not opposed to the idea of writing a part two, i usually don’t have any ideas for a part two because most of the things i write are meant to be 1 parters and so if i can’t think of anything sometimes ill ask them what they’d like to see in a part 2 or if they want to send in a request for it but they never respond? i hope it doesn’t seem like i want them to basically come up with the idea for me but im just kinda confused on why people ask for a part 2 on something i wrote when it doesn’t seem like they’re really that serious about wanting to see more because it’s happened at least 3 times now.

anyways, i hope your day is going good (and if it isn’t i hope that changes soon :/ <3) and that those delusional obsessive weirdos learn to fuck off and stop making shit up

okay, idk if people have noticed this, but I have started putting disclaimers on my fics. I have literally had to put disclaimers at the end of my fics saying 'this is meant to be a oneshot, so please to not comment asking for a part 2' - and comments on my oneshots have gone down so much since I started doing this. I have gotten way less comments on my oneshots because of this. (because people don't want to talk about the actual fic, they just want to ask for more.)

because I couldn't handle the mental strain of getting a notification of a comment, getting excited about it, and then opening that comment to see 'part 2?' or 'omg you need to continue this' - when the ending was very purposeful and it was a oneshot for a reason. especially smut. like just because I don't include both partners having an orgasm and pillow talk, people demand that it's incomplete. people saying 'when are you gonna finish this fic' kills me. it is finished. (kill me, please. you need to kill me.)

and like sometimes I never think that I would ever write a second part to a fic, but positive comments encourage it. my Gleggie fic Hold Me Tight Or Don't - a fic where the main character fucking dies - is a very open and shut case for a fic without a sequel. because the main character IS DEAD. but someone in the comments made a joke about being in their 'Ellie Williams era' because they wanted to mentally deny the sad ending, and it sparked a whole idea for me where the reader character is immune and lives instead. and that fic is currently in my drafts and I am excited about finishing it in the future.

that is the power that engaging comments can have - it can spawn a whole new fic from a place where there was a dead end plot with absolutely 0 potential

but yeah, thank you for this message. I hope you're having a good day - my day is mid level, and I hope to have a better day tomorrow.

and for reference, to all fic readers/commenters out there - if you really like a fic and you are really excited about the idea of a possible sequel to it, here is how you go about asking for it:

go to the writer's ask box or their DMs - open up a line of communication that is separate from the comment section of that fic

tell them that you really loved that fic, and tell them a reason why - the writer will want to know that you are supporting their work, and that you're not just asking for more fanfiction because you're bored

politely ask if they would consider writing a sequel or a continuation to that work

and maybe, in the same message, pose some possible ideas or concepts for that follow up

so, something like "hey, I really loved Hold Me Tight Or Don't. I love the way you contrast the themes of sex and death. but I couldn't help but to wonder what would happen if the reader was immune and survived. would you ever consider writing a follow up or a sequel to it? if not, that's okay."

(fyi, even on works where I have said I do not want to make a sequel, I am open to these ^^ kind of messages if you are particularly interested in one of my works having a possible sequel. the circumstances for each of my works having a sequel is different in every case)

[goneahead]

Writer 20 Questions

I was tagged by @stephmcx and @itwoodbeprefect back when trilobites roamed the earth. Um, sorry?

How many works do you have on A03? Actually, I’m mostly on Dreamwidth so:

Dreamwidth ~150 fics

AO3 is 59 fics

What's your total AO3 word count?

DW is 1,012,997

A03 is 404,628

note: I don’t keep an exact track of my separate poetry journal but there are 947 poems—so I am guessing that’s another 75,000 words😁

What fandoms do you write for? Currently? Steve and Danny from Hawaii Five-0 have stolen both my heart and my muse!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

* Care and Feeding of a SuperSEAL

* Trusses of my Heart

* A Bodyguard for Christmas

* The Long Road Home (Broken Road on DW)

* Five Times Steve was an Idiot, but Danny Kissed Him Anyway

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I do respond to comments, but in a completely random and haphazard way because I am incable of being organized😂

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? My H50 comment fic ‘Anger’ is definitely my most angsty ending. And yes, it’s yet another fic I need to cross-post to A03…

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? It’s a toss up between Care and Feeding and Bodyguard. I love happy ever afters!

Do you get hate on fics? Not on my fics per se, but I called out some people who were bullying a friend of mine in another fandom—and they decided to repost all my fics on other sites to punish me for speaking up. So, now all my fic is on Dreamwidth and friend-locked. I am slowly cross-post H50 fic to A03, but I doubt I will ever cross-post fic from that other fandom.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I will write sex if its necessary for the story, but porn is definitely one of my weak spots as a writer.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Occaisonally. I wrote an Addams FamilyxAvengers that was very short and very silly😂

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes, many. At least I am really good at writing DMCA letters now?

Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope, but I had few pod-ficced ages and ages ago.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I used to co-write regularly, but my co-writers all got super busy😭

What's your all-time favorite ship? I think McDanno has ruined me for all other ships.

What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? I have a X-MenxSupernatural fic that my co-writer had to abandon.

What are your writing strengths?I love to world build and have been told my AUs are very believable. Even when I do really crazy stuff, like **checks notes** space spiders.😁

What are your writing weaknesses? Writing sex scenes. Definitely.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

In general, I think writers are still working out how to write fanfic that is easy to read on mobile screens. For example, long paragraphs and conversations between more than three people are sooo much harder to read on a mobile phone.

Heck, I’ve even stopped using italics for dream sequences/flashbacks because it’s just not readable on a small screen. And then there’s coding. **Sigh** Dreamwidth has updated their coding and now I really need to reformat my entire journal because the changed have made my older fanfic much harder to read.

So when it comes to different languages or dialects, I try to come up with something that will make it easier for my readers, instead of relying on the ‘proper’ way to do things. I don’t know if I’m always successful, but I at least make a stab at it. And since I have a fic I’m currently rewriting that has 13 different languages in it, I definitely spend more time than I want to admit thinking about this problem! ��🤪

First fandom you wrote for? Duran Duran bandom. Yes, I just dated myself😂😂😂

Favorite fic you've ever written? My fic with the most kudos is Care and Feeding of a Super SEAL. The fic that people are still dming me about is So Let Me Set Your Battlements On Fire over on dreamwidth.

Tagging @cowandcalf @actingcamplibrarian @stellagioia @redgoldblue @bennyokelly and anybody else who wants to play!

[randum-famdoms]

Small progress update on my mom sold me to the detective prince :)

So, chapter 14 is still far from ready. BUT! I have finally caved and switched to using a different writing program than docs, and in the process I went through the effort of actually organising my warzone of a notes system (which was basically four different notes systems, comprised of comments on the google doc, the bottom ten pages of the google doc, a file in my phone’s notes app, and screenshots from my texts with my beta, and of course none of it was actually organized and half of was no longer accurate to my current plan for the fic).

I also finished a COMPLETE preliminary outline. By which I mean that I have a tentative plan going all the way up to the end of the fic, but it can change at any time if I have a better idea or whatever. Said summary is like, 5k words long. And still doesn’t cover everything (it covers the main beats but not all the fallout of events, like if someone dies then it’s in the summary but the character reactions to said death is not). I gotta say, I’m pretty excited about what I came up with. Now it’s just a matter of getting there…

I haven’t organized all of it into individual chapters, but if I had to guess then I’d estimate the total complete fic will be something around 80 chapters long (mind you, that’s completely subjective to change. In the past one chapter has become three, so. Yeah. Give this estimate a 20 chapter buffer on both ends) and 500k ish words (again a total guess and with a large buffer).

I’m hoping that the writing program switch will make things easier, especially organisation-wise.

If anyone is wondering, I switched to Elipsus, and I am loving it so far. I’ll be making a separate post basically just singing its praises. Highly recommend for any writers out there, 10/10 program.

Anyway, chapter 14 is going to be MASSIVE. Should I probably split it up into multiple chapters? Yeah. Will I? No, because I like how dramatic it is. Think if it like a season finale, 2 hours long compared to the normal 45 minute episodes. It’s going to be the “final” chapter of the Kamoshida arc - sort of. There’s still the fallout to get through, and that’s going to be just as dramatic, at least in my opinion. Don’t worry though, we’ll be at the second palace soon. Provided my outline doesn’t change, chapter 18 will be the start of Yusuke.

In other news, my schedule has gotten busier. By a lot. School things have come up, and I’m trying to make some money by getting a part time job I’ll still write when I can, but I might need to change the post schedule again. That remains to be seen. Regardless of what happens there, I WILL continue making these progress reports, as well as always posting on the same day, even if the gaps between chapters is inconsistent.

I might make the discord server public on here, before the chapter is posted. That’s only if it isn’t done by the end of the week, though.

As always, feel free to scream at me in asks, comments, and dm’s about whatever you want. If you ask a question then there like a 90% chance I’ll answer (the 10% being if it’s private info about me or my beta). Suggestions are always welcome too!

That’s it for now, see ya’ll eventually

[icebreaker01]

You had ONE job!

(Author stands in front the group tasked with killing Nima. Behind the author is a white board on which is a picture of a short stick figure with glasses, a messy drawing of hair on top and could be a body double for a platypus and no one would know the difference.) (Author snaps a pointer on the picture.) "You SEE this?! You see what it looks like!?" (Snaps the pointer over to a second stick figure on the white board which is much taller, has a neat head of hair and could double as a telephone pole.) "And you see THIS!?" (Pauses) "Can ANYONE P.L.E.A.S.E. explain to me how you can possibly MISTAKE the two?" (Group member 1) "It was dark?" "This whole show has looked like it was filmed in a mile deep bunker where they forgot to pay the electric bill. Try again." (Group member 2) "He had his back to us?" (Author angerly taps the two pictures again.) "Height alone should have been a tip off!" (Group member 3) "He was leaned over!" "Even at waist high he was still taller than that little weasel!" "Just a minute! Why are you so upset? You didn't like the character anyway. Why are you so upset about what happened to him?" "Because his 'sacrifice' made no sense whatsoever. Now get out there and try again!" (Author stands at the door and hands out 5X7 glossy's as they leave.)

And yes, folks, I am more than a little peeved at how they wrote Bennett Knox's character out of the show. The scene was poorly thought out by the writers and once again, I wish they would get off the crack. Now, having read ahead in this show, I have a bit of insight into things that are going to happen. And each character demise thus far has left me sitting in front of my TV thinking "Whattttttt?" I was fine with Zarah being written off. She was a self-serving little so-and-so from the start. Good riddance. But lets take a look at their latest 'It's the last season, lets see what we can do for shock value' action. 1. Did the trains need to be separated RIGHT THEN! No. This was a poorly contrived plot point. 2. What? Big Alice doesn't have ONE, single survival suit? You couldn't take five seconds of film time to slip his skinny little butt into it? And it isn't like he doesn't know about them! He's spent 50% of the series in one. I swear, I think the character sleeps in one he loves them so much. 3. The most important people on the trains are the engineers. Yet THESE are the characters you choose to write off the show? What? Did Bennett 'MacGyver' Knox run out of ideas suddenly. You're asking me to believe that a man who could come up with all the fun little tricks he has thus far in the show, could think of NOTHING better than to walk out into freezing cold weather to uncouple a train car? Sirs, you both insult and tax my level of disbelief. 4. Poor Melanie now has no one to talk science to except the smarmy little weasel. And talking to Nima is like talking to a Schizophrenic who has been off his meds for a month. And believe me folks, in my line of work, I know a thing or two about what this looks like. (Holds up a picture of Nima.) 5. Standing at the door, after the cars were uncoupled, Bennett was still alive. What? Did 99% of his brain freeze first and he didn't think, 'Hey, I can turn around and run back into the train!'. Instead he just STOOD there and froze? (See end of item 3 comment.) 6. In the 'The writers have no idea what their doing' column, I would like to point out that if you know anything about living up north, it is not for a fashionable look that people wear scarfs wrapped around their noses outside in 12 degree weather. If you don't, your lungs freeze LONG before the rest of you does. Why? Because of the moisture in them. Executing people on the train by strapping a mask on them with a tube leading to the outside took what?.....30 seconds? Yet Bennett had time to run down a corridor with no more protection than a winter coat and gloves, uncouple a train car, then stand back up and admire the view. Why did he not turn his skinny little butt around instead and run back up said corridor and into the train? This whole scene just made no sense.

Here's what I think happened: (The following is the author's interpretation of what happened at the end of S4E5.) (In the writers trailer, they are staring at names pinned to the wall, deciding who they can legitimately write off the show before the end and still have enough characters left to have an end.) (Iddo Goldberg walks into the trailer.) "Hi, guys. Look, I have a slight problem." "What is it? We're busy." "Well, I have another opportunity with this new show that's starting filming in a few weeks, and I....sort of need off the train." "Done! Have a nice life." "Thanks, guys. You're the best." (Goldberg leaves and the writers quickly smile at each other.) "Gone by the halfway point?" "No problem."

And I understand this was suppose to be a 7 seasons show, and the writers are annoyed because they had this great storyboard already planned out and now they have to cram everything into ten episodes. It bites. But could you at least leave a few main characters alive? And I would do a revised 'Who makes it and who doesn't' list. But due to my getting out my trusty shovel and digging into sites where people post who have seen the entire season already, I can't do this anymore. But in regards to the original list I made and how wrong it is.......I'm amazed.

One last word of warning, folks. Be sure in the next 1-2 episodes to have a thick layer of towels set under your TV screen. Because when Melanie finds out what happened to Bennett......well, we all know how that goes. And it will surely be...messy.

[bibliophileiz]

2023 in Books, Part 2

(posting a day late, oops)

This was a pretty great literary year for me. Even the books at the end of this list I enjoyed reading. I left out an anthology I read for class (Peach Pit is ... interesting) and a book of poetry written by someone I know, just because I don't know anything about poetry and don't want my personal feelings about the poet (she's great) to muddle it even further. I also already posted a separate list ranking the six children's/YA books I read. That still leaves thirty-one books to rank, though.

As usual, this is based entirely on personal preference/enjoyment and not necessarily on quality of writing or story. I reserve the right to change my mind about this ranking as soon as I post it because I am fickle like that. (Although I don't think I'm going to change my mind about my number 1 choice.) Here ya go.

31. The Ex Hex by Erin Sterling Dates Read: Dec. 12-13 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: A witch accidentally curses her ex-boyfriend, and by extension her small magical Georgia town. She and her ex have to lift the curse without falling in love (which of course they do anyway). One-sentence review: (directly from my GR review) Cute and witchy, just the thing to get you through finals week.

30. Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld Dates Read: April 28-May 7 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: A musician and comedy writer seem to hit it off when the musician guest stars on the comedy writer’s late-night show, only for the writer to blow it by assuming the musician is a shallow womanizer. A few years later, they rekindle their connection during pandemic lockdowns. One-sentence review: I liked the characters, but as usual Sittenfeld is more interested in commenting on whatever she saw on Twitter while she was writing this then she was on, like, writing a dramatic plot.

29. The Murder of Mr. Wickham by Claudia Gray Dates Read: Aug. 19-27 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: All of Jane Austen’s beloved couples (except the Tilneys), plus the Darcys’ son and the Tilneys’ daughter, attend a house party at the Knightleys’ where Mr. Wickham turns up and is immediately murdered. One-sentence review: This is what P.D. James’ Death Comes to Pemberley SHOULD have been.

28. Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus Dates Read: May 24-27 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: It’s the 1960s, and chemist Elizabeth Zott was kicked out of her Ph.D. program for reporting her supervisor for rape, and then loses her job after she becomes pregnant outside wedlock, and ends up starting her own STEM cooking show and some other stuff happens, look, I know you already read the reviews of this one. One-sentence review: It was fine, I just thought it was overrated.

27. The Paris Deception by Bryn Turnbull Dates Read: Aug. 23-Sept. 7 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: Two women immersed in the French art world in the 1930s and ‘40s defy their German occupiers by hiding, documenting, and sometimes copying “degenerate” art to keep it from the hands of high-ranking Nazi officials and sympathizers, or to keep it from being destroyed. One-sentence review:  The main characters were great and I really like the focus on protecting art and culture from extermination, but the constant time jumps drove me nuts.

26. Forever, Interrupted by Taylor Jenkins Reid Dates Read: April 3-5 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: Less than two weeks into her marriage, a young woman is widowed and only meets her mother-in-law at the hospital. The two strangers find a way to navigate their grief together. One-sentence review: While the grief could be gut-wrenching due to Reid’s fantastic writing, the characters were nothing spectacular.

25. Hell’s Half-Acre: The Untold Story of the Benders, America’s First Serial Killer Family by Susan Jonusas Dates Read: Jan. 29-31 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: The Benders were a creepy family in late 19th Century Kansas who murdered people who stayed at their boarding house and then disappeared before they could be arrested. One-sentence review: I’m not super into true crime—it has to be historical for me to even start it--but I did like the look at life in the Midwest.

24. Galatea by Madeline Miller Dates Read: Jan. 6 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: Madeline Miller retells the Pygmalion myth in a way that doesn’t suck. One-sentence review: Miller smartly skips the gender misery by making this a short story and then delivers an extremely satisfying ending.

23. My Sister, the Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite Dates Read: July 26 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: Korede and Ayoola are sisters who fall for the same man. Ayoola is hot and a serial killer, and Korede is getting pretty tired of covering for her. One-sentence review: Despite (or perhaps because) all the characters are awful, this book STAYS with you, and I feel like it would be a blast to talk about in a drunken book club. Note: I listened to the audiobook and want to give narrator Adepero Oduye a shout out.

22. The Weaver and the Witch Queen by Genevieve Gornichec Dates Read: July 24-Aug. 17 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: Three friends in Medieval Scandinavia find themselves in the middle of a Game of Thrones-esque rivalry for the crown and a deadly battle between supernatural forces. One-sentence review: Good story and I liked the characters, but it moved too slowly sometimes.

21. The Wedding Dress Sewing Circle by Jennifer Ryan Dates Read: May 7-10 GoodReads Rating: Four stars (I was feeling more generous about Grace marrying Hugh than I am right now) Summary: A sewing circle in a small English village in the 1940s decide to pool their talents and resources to help English brides wear the perfect white gown to their weddings, clothing rations be damned. One-sentence review: Ryan excels at writing about women and civilians in wartime, and I would have ranked this so much higher if it hadn’t ended with the best character marrying the worst one.

20. The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid Dates Read: Jan. 31-Feb. 8 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: Aging actress Evelyn Hugo (who is not Elizabeth Taylor, by which I mean she absolutely is Elizabeth Taylor) invites a young journalist to write her life story. One-sentence review: The plot was engaging and thought-provoking, but I never could decide how I felt about Evelyn.

19. A House with Good Bones by T. Kingfisher Dates Read: Oct. 28-Nov. 1 GoodReads Rating: Three stars Summary: An archaeologist visits her mother at the family home in North Carolina only to find that her grandmother’s ghost is haunting it. But how do you banish a ghost once you learn it’s keeping something far worse at bay? One-sentence review: Of all the haunted house books I read this year, this one was the worst, and yet it was still great.

19. To Swoon and to Spar by Martha Waters (That’s right, I ranked a trashy Regency romance above both Romantic Comedy AND Lessons in Chemistry) Dates Read: May 17-24 GoodReads Rating: Four stars (Objectively, this was too many, but I also don’t care.) Summary: When Viscount Penvale’s uncle promises to sell him back the family estate for a steal if Penvale marries his uncle’s ward Jane, Penvale reluctantly agrees. He and Jane make an agreement to leave each other alone, but Penvale didn’t expect to fall in love with her. Nor did he expect his family house to be haunted. One-sentence review: The Regency Vows series just keeps getting better, honestly.

17. A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson Dates Read: Aug. 31-Oct. 13 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: Humor writer Bill Bryson and his on-again-off-again friend Katz decide to hike the Appalachian Trail, and Bryson tells you all about its history and natural resources along the way. There are moose, but no (confirmed) bears. One-sentence review: This book got me really into nature and hiking again.

16. The Shining by Stephen King Dates Read: Dec. 1-4 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: I know you know what this book’s about. One-sentence review: Super tense, riveting look into the mind of a toxic, self-absorbed abuser who doesn’t need to be anywhere near blizzards, haunted houses, or children.

15. Carrie Soto Is Back by Taylor Jenkins Reid Dates Read: July 12-23 GoodReads Rating: Five stars (Objectively, this book probably deserves that. Subjectively, I like Regency romances and journalists better than sports stars.) Summary: A retired tennis star full of rage and ambition makes a comeback to keep a younger player from breaking her record. One-sentence review: An absorbing, balanced take on the pressures women athletes face, plus a heart-warming father-daughter story, with some romance and female friendships to round it out.

14. Swamp Story by Dave Barry Dates Read: Dec. 30 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: There is actually too much going on to summarize this book, but suffice to say it involves a desperate single mom, her shirtless fame-hounding ex-boyfriend, a failed journalist with a drinking problem, and a lot of people in the Florida Everglades looking for a cryptid OR Confederate gold OR pythons. One-sentence review: Dave Barry writes about Florida like it’s a drunk, eccentric relative who everyone hangs around at the family reunion even though he smells bad, because he has the best stories.

13. Vampires of El Norte by Isabel Cañas Dates Read: Oct. 15-28 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: During the Mexican-American War, a Wuthering Heights-esque couple learn their homeland is being stalked by vampires. One-sentence review: You root for the couple, you root for the Mexicans, you even root for the vampires once or twice, but you never root for the Texas Rangers. Note: The couple is Wuthering Heights-esque in the sense that he is poor, she is rich, they were childhood sweethearts, and then they were separated—not in the toxic incest way.

12. A Lady for a Duke by Alexis Hall Dates Read: July 12-23 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: A trans woman believed to be dead at the Battle of Waterloo reinvents herself and returns home to England, only to find that her best friend has been consumed by grief over her death. As she helps him heal—and he slowly falls for her—she battles with whether to tell him who she really is. One-sentence review: I'm a sucker for love stories in which the couple are torn asunder, believe they will never see each other again, and then are reunited unexpectedly. Note: This actually would have ranked a lot higher if all the main couple’s angst wasn’t basically resolved in the first half. The second half is fine but not as good.

11. The Lover by Silvia Moreno-Garcia Dates Read: Dec. 26 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: A young woman must choose between two potential “lovers” who come from the woods in this dark fairy tale novella. One-sentence review: Finally, a good werewolf book.

10. The Dark Queens: The Bloody Rivalry That Forged the Medieval World by Shelley Puhak Dates Read: April 4-14 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: Puhak writes about the feud between rival Merovingian queens Fredegund and Brunhild in sixth century western Europe. One-sentence review: It’s like Game of Thrones, but real, shorter, and with more women and less sexual assault.

9. Lafayette in the Somewhat United States by Sarah Vowell Dates Read: Dec. 14-25 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: Vowell writes Lafayette’s biography, focusing on his and the larger French role in the American Revolution, all while musing on our country’s inability to agree on anything. One-sentence review: Vowell’s irreverent essay style is just the tone needed to tackle the oft-romanticized American Revolution.

8. The Hacienda by Isabel Cañas Dates Read: July 23-26 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: In the aftermath of the Mexican War for Independence, a young bride moves to her landed husband’s country estate, only to find that the house is super haunted and her new in-laws super racist. One-sentence review: Your standard haunted house story, except the ghost is colonialism.

7. Under the Whispering Door by T.J. Klune Dates Read: Oct. 29-31 GoodReads Rating: Five stars (was probably generous, but the ending had just made me cry, so) Summary: When workaholic Wallace dies, his spirit is sent to a teashop for transition to the afterlife. But after a few weeks of hanging around teashop owner and “ferryman” Hugo, his reaper, and the ghosts of Hugo’s dog and grandfather, Wallace realizes he doesn’t want to leave what he’s coming to think of as his family. One-sentence review: A lovely mixture of funny and sad, this book is a nuanced look at death and found family.

6. Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia Dates Read: Nov. 1-6 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: A debutante from Mexico City visits her cousin’s haunted house in the countryside where she’s pulled into a mystery surrounding her cousin’s eugenics-obsessed in-laws. One-sentence review: Noemi is a fantastic character, and the plot is engrossing, which is good because you will hate all the other characters.

5. Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer Dates Read: Aug. 9-29 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: In 1996, Outside magazine sent Jon Krakauer to cover the burgeoning commercialization of Mount Everest. When Krakauer climbed the mountain himself, he and his team got caught in a freak snowstorm that resulted in what was then the worst disaster in the history of the mountain. One-sentence review: Apart from being a really tense and riveting account of a brutal natural disaster in an already brutal environment, Krakauer’s account of the 1996 storm on Everest raises questions about who should be on the world’s highest mountain and whether money and fame have blinded guides and climbers to the risks of tackling the summit.

4. The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi by Shannon Chakraborty Dates Read: Nov. 20-30 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: Amina al-Sirafi, a retired smuggler and single mom on the Arabian peninsula, has to get her old band crew back together for the promise of more money than they’ve ever dreamed of when wealthy grandmother hires Amina to rescue her kidnapped granddaughter. But things go awry when the crew learns the girl is with an evil crusader with plans to unleash dark magic and monsters on the world. Inspired by the rich mythology, religions, and history of the Middle East, East Africa, and the Indian Ocean. One-sentence review:  I have not had so much fun reading a fantasy novel since I was a kid reading Harry Potter and I can’t wait for the sequel.

3. Lone Women by Victor LaValle Dates Read: Oct. 5-12 GoodReads Rating: Four stars Summary: In the early 1900s, a woman burns her parents’ mangled bodies in their California farmhouse and flees to Montana with a secret locked in a heavy trunk. One-sentence review: Frankenstein meets Calamity Jane in this horror Western about race and female friendships.

2. We Could Be So Good by Cat Sebastian Dates Read: Oct. 28-Nov. 9 GoodReads Rating: Five stars Summary: Two men reporting for a progressive newspaper in 1950s New York fall in love. One-sentence review: I mean, it’s journalists in love in the 1950s, and one of them is investigating police corruption and the other covered a Civil Rights meeting in DC, so of course I loved this book.

1. The Correspondents: Six Women Writers on the Front Lines of World War II by Judith Mackrell Dates Read: Nov. 27-Dec. 26 (during finals and holidays with family—I don’t think I could have finished the book if it wasn’t so good) GoodReads Rating: Five stars Summary: Mackrell covers the WWII careers of six journalists—a correspondent in Berlin who ingratiated herself in the Nazi Party to tell America about Hitler’s plans for world domination; a photojournalist for Vogue who took pictures from the Blitz to Dachau; a young American whose coverage of both sides of the Spanish Civil War catapulted her to journalistic stardom; Martha Gellhorn whose fury at her husband (you’ve heard of him) compelled her to illegally stow away on board a hospital ship and cover the invasion of Normandy from Omaha Beach while helping wounded soldiers; a rogue freelancer who broke the story of the invasion of Poland and whose thrill-chasing career took her from there to Greece to North Africa and beyond; and Helen Kirkpatrick, who covered the liberation of Paris while Hemingway was getting plastered at the Ritz.

Review: There is too much to say about this book. Mackrell did an incredible job. These journalists’ triumphs and tragedies play out alongside the triumphs and tragedies of the world’s biggest conflict. Each woman had different motivations and goals, from thrill-seeking to career-making, from spite to idealism to simply a love of journalism and dogged search for the truth. While Sigrid Schultz’s Chicago editor applauded Hitler’s control of Germany, Sigrid warned his readers of Hitler’s ambition. When the world turned a blind eye to Hitler’s military build-up and annexation of half of Europe, Virginia Cowles and Helen Kirkpatrick wrote furiously against Chamberlain’s policy of appeasement. And while the rest of the world celebrated the end of the war in Europe, Lee Miller swept through Dachau taking pictures and refusing to ignore the human cost of fascism and war.

All of this was at great personal risk. The Nazis tapped Sigrid’s phone and searched her house until she was finally forced to flee to America in the early 1940s (where her editor promptly benched her for three and a half years). Virginia dodged bombs in Madrid, and Helen dodged bullets in Paris. And Lee Miller defiantly washed off the stink of Dachau in Hitler’s own bath, which was immortalized in a photo her equally defiant boyfriend took in the days after the Fuhrer’s death. Mackrell’s prose also gets into the nitty gritty of correspondent life, how the reporters all camped out in hotels and spent their days chasing stories and their nights drinking whiskey. She discusses the friendships and rivalries—Marth and Virginia became great friends in Spain and eventually wrote a play together satirizing the misogyny they faced during the war. And while the stars are the six I mentioned above, cameos include Mary Welch (Hemingway’s wife after Martha), Dorothy Thompson, Vogue editor Audrey Withers, and “Maggie the indestructible” who convinced an American commander to let her go on a bombing mission over North Africa, paving the way for other women correspondents on the front line after the US entered the war. Plus there are appearances from Picasso, both Randolph and Winston Churchill, Eleanor Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, David Lloyd George, the Duke of Windsor after he abdicated, Hemingway of course, and half the Nazi high command. Mackrell uses the women’s own words to describe the bombing of Madrid, the mass evacuation from Paris, the refugee crises in Eastern Europe, and the Night of Long Knives in Germany. Every moment is riveting as Mackrell and the women she writes about pull you into Europe of the 1940s.

[13-rats-in-a-trenchcoat]

Traffic/Evo Watcher headcanon, don't mind me

Ok, so we've known awhile now that the next season of the Life series is going to be released soon, so naturally I've been re-watching the previous seasons and going over POVs I hadn't seen before. While going down this rabbit hole I came across a Martyn stream I missed where he was talking about the Watchers lore and how he and Grian worked on it for Evo and then he kind of altered it from what Grian originally imagined (i.e. the Watchers being representative of us, the audience, who watch them for entertainment) to the more sinister lore we Traffic connoisseurs are familiar with today. This got me thinking. A lot. Too much even. What if we, the audience, were STILL the Watchers? I'm not talking about for the Life series or Evo series specifically, I'm thinking more broad spectrum, like across the MCYT multiverse type thing. I like a cohesive story, and I like puzzles, and when there are stories that look like they could be pieces of a bigger puzzle I enjoy smooshing them together in one giant headcanon that more or less makes sense, so here we go.

The canon lore we have (as I understand it anyway) is as follows: the Watchers first made themselves known during Evo, where they messed with the Evolutionists as they went through each Minecraft update, ultimately separating them for the final dragon fight where Grian would leave Evo and become a Watcher himself. From there the Listeners (who I know diddly squat about) got involved and helped the Evolutionists escape the Evo server, thus getting them away from Watcher influence. Or so they hoped. The Watchers somehow regained power over the Players that were involved in Evo, along with some of their friends, and put them in what is essentially a never-ending loop of death games as punishment for their defiance. Grian didn't like how the Watchers operated, so he left them to join his friend in the death games. The Watchers feed off the Players' negative emotions, but leave their memories, thus enabling them to start fresh each season without holding on to previous grudges (though considering Impulse's thing with BDubs and the clock and Tango's rage that might not be entirely effective)

This is where my headcanon comes in. The Watchers are a group of people/sentient beings of some kind who feed off of the negative emotions of others and watch their misery and struggles for entertainment. They're a mischievous bunch, some might even say troll-like (of the internet variety, not like in fairy tales), and at least two of them enjoy speaking in rhyme, i.e. they're artistic and dramatic. Sound familiar? Because to me this description sounds very much like the wider MCYT fanbase, especially the fan artists/writers. I mean come on, when have we NOT jumped at the opportunity to turn a pretty normal moment into the angstiest piece of writing/art imaginable. Case in point, Mumbo and Grian at the ghast farm in Last Life. They were giggling through that whole interaction, yet I've watched SEVERAL angsty animatics about just that one scene and I've loved every second of it.

This next bit is likely a pretty big reach, but the thought popped into my head and wouldn't go away so I would just like to get it out there. Grian doesn't really interact with his comments on an individual basis, but he definitely has addressed the more negative ones, especially the ones that go after his friends when they're on an opposing side of whatever war he's started at that moment in time. This ties in pretty well with him not liking the way the Watchers operate in my opinion, and it also ties in with him leaving the Watchers to help his friends. Not necessarily directly, but more in the sense of the vibes matching up.

We currently don't know enough about the Watchers to definitively say how plausible this headcanon of mine is, like we don't know exactly how many Watchers there are, or how many Listeners there are, or what separates a Watcher from a Listener, or really any info about the Listeners in general. I do think it's a pretty fun headcanon though, and until it is directly contradicted this is how I will view the Watchers. Thank you for reading my essay.

[sorcerous-caress]

I just wanna thank you so much for your completely earned deconstruction of the writer/reader relationship. I have 2 separate writing blogs, and one, my main in fact, I've all but completely given up on until I want to write again. The other is being transferred to be my new main, and I'm not sure if I'll take requests. I've been debating just taking commissions that I'm comfortable with, and posting my own writing when the mood strikes. You've really made me think, and I appreciate that so much! ❤️

I'm not sure if you've had a similar experience, but basically one of my works exploded somewhat and another did to a lesser extent. I was working on other things and all anyone cared about was those two fics.

When I tell you I pored hours upon hours into this super high fantasy rewrite crossover of my favorite game with the same characters, I mean it. My first chapter was over 8k and I made sure I did a bunch of research to nail both the combat, and dialouge.

I posted it, initially meant to be posted between that and one of the fics- only for it to be ignored and instead all I got was update asks. No-one cared when it was right in my rules that it gave me anxiety and made me not want to write.

It got so bad, I literally dropped the blog. I haven't updated my most popular work since 2019 and I've only the past 6 months got inspired for the secondary popular fic. I got so in my head- desperate to do what my readers wanted and not upset anyone. To this day the next chapter sits half written, with me still torn to rewrite it entirely, or just finish it the way I want to and go from there. Yet it's so soured for me. I still love my concept. I still kind of want to repurpose it and flesh it out but I just get such a bitter taste in my mouth and I freeze and get anxiety even now when I re-read it.

Ironically the lack of reception to my passion project was my wake up call. I was genuinely devastated. I had one thankfully amazing commenter(of course on Archive of Our Own), who didn't know my niche little fantasy video game save its very opening hours(It's Final Fantasy 4, in case you're curious), but clicked anyway and gushed about my execution. A whole 4-5 paragraphs. I cried when I read it, beaming ear to ear grin.

If it wasn't for her? I very well may have quit posting my writing altogether and you know what? I still post that fic. Slowly, granted. My 2nd chapter was 9k+ and the 3rd is looking to be over 10k and has taken over 2 years thanks to a lot going on. She posted again on that 2nd chapter though! And I go back and read it when I need inspiration. I'm basically solely posting it for her.

Just...thanks. For sharing how you feel on this. I've always really struggled with feeling selfish, or like I have no right to ask for a comment. I still can put myself down and feel incredibly guilty, especially about that constantly asked about fic. Feel like I should take the likes and update asks with a smile because "that means they like it, obviously, they're asking for more, right?" I don't think people not actively creating and posting get it, and you truly put it into words in a way I've struggled with for years.

I'm new here, and still playing through the game and all, but please know at least I see you. I appreciate all the hard work you do and put in. You don't owe any of anything, and I'm so grateful for anything you choose to share with us. I think a lot of people underestimate how intimate sharing our writing is.

Also appreciate you mentioning the difference in respect between fanartists and fanwriters. SO many people think "Anyone can write." and we get belittled so much faster for offering commissions too. It takes just as much skill, whether people believe that or not.

Just...thanks. For real. You've given me a lot to consider as I work on transferring my new blog over and I appreciate it more than you know. ❤️ -S

That genuinely means a lot, it's an honour to have even meant something to anyone at all.

Especially someone struggling with the same thing I am. Thank you for taking the time to write and tell me this, i never thought anyone would bother to read my rant or take it seriously.

I relate to a lot of the things you've just described, it's really horrible how the world can twist something we love and are passionate for into something that hurts us instead. I'm never forgiving anyone who made me feel anxious about writing a story I was excited about or for posting something knowing instead of feedback I'd be met with asks about updating the more popular story.

And I'm happy to hear that you take commissions, just to make it clear I'm totally against the whole "mixing money with art makes it lose meaning" fiasco. I think it's stupid and people who claim that they don't understand that you can never put art in a box or steal its meaning away, that artists are people who need to eat and pay their bills too.

Your writing more than deserves money, it's something intimate that we pour our heart into, that we take parts of our life experience and memories and put it in the story to give it its own life.

Fuck anyone who thinks writing is below art, just because it's written words. They never consider the planning, creativity, writing style and experience, the research, plot and energy it takes.

If anything at least you can draw and paint while listening to music or watching youtube, you can let your hand go on autopilot every now and then. With writing it's one of those jobs you can't distract your mind from, you have to be present and you have to focus on every word and line, consider every dialogue option and every descriptive word, it's draining mentally and takes so much focus.

Both art and writing are important, all artists deserve respect and compensation for their work. People are getting too comfortable demanding work that takes literal hours from your life for free or a low price, a work they'll consume so quickly and never give a second thought to.

I hope things get better for both you and me, I hope we find readers who appreciate us for who we are, who actually respect and value our work instead of consuming it mindlessly, who understand what it takes to create and the amount of time we're giving out for free.

Who realise that taking 10 or 5 minutes to write a comment under a fic and phrase it politely isn't that hard, how it's literally all we ask for because it means the world to see someone appreciate our effort.

Good luck on your new blog <3 Close the requests whenever you want and open them whenever you want. Write how you want to, and please don't let anyone steal the joy of writing away from you.

[krankittoeleven]

[20 Question Fic Writer Tag]

tagged by @brasideios - Thank you thank you!

How many works do you have on AO3? 16

What is your AO3 word count? 179,340

What fandoms do you write for? Currently Trigun, Jujutsu Kaisen and Assassin's Creed Valhalla

What are your top five fics by kudos? But Like a Refuge (Trigun), Because the Night (Trigun), Sweets for the Sweet (Trigun), Midnattssol (ACV), Water of Life (ACV)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, if I don't then there was a clerical error on my part or something. Comments make me feel great so of course I'm gonna return the vibe.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Gefinn Óðni, maybe. Honestly all my fics currently up have positive or hopeful endings. If I went through my pre AO3 fics I'm sure I could find worse. lol

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Sweets for the Sweet is pure donut eating fluff so probably that. Or But Like A Refugee since someone lives when they would have died in canon.

Do you get hate on fics? Nah

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, mlm mostly, have written all orientations in the past. Got some m/f and m/m/f coming down the pipeline (in theory lol).

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I keep mixing Lovecraft into things, so idk if that counts. I keep pondering a GO/Trigun crossover but IDK. One crossover I started 15 years ago, but never finished (I still have it though!) was Kenren (Saiyuki Gaiden)/Kakashi (Naruto) where Kenren was ex military and Kakashi was an assassin whose inner dialogue comes in the form of his dead fellow assassin-former-lover's voice (that'd be Iruka XD). It is 100% the wackiest thing I ever thought up and I honestly would LOVE to finish it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? I don't think so.

Have you ever had a fic translated? No.

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? No but I'd give it a try. Back in the day I did do some writer-artist collabs.

What's your all-time favourite ship? I could not possibly choose one. <- yeah what Jenn said. But I'm gonna go off anyway LOL I cannot separate Kenren/Tenpou, Aziraphale/Crowley and Vash/Wolfwood, they all fell into my lap around the same time in the early 2000s and they all changed my brain chemistry. Even if I never consume a piece of media about them again, they'll live in my head, rent free, for all time. Modern day shout outs, though, to: Eivor/Vili (got me back into writing) Ubba/Vili (kept me writing) and Nanami/Gojo (currently destroying me one molecule at a time).

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will? As I said, that crossover up there, that would be awesome but it's probably a pipe dream. I do not want to mention any current WIP of the last couple years because I don't want to jinx anything.

What are your writing strengths? I think I write dialogue and banter well, I get a lot of complements on that and I tend to agree. I think I also nail it on longing and loss just from rl experience lol

What are your writing weaknesses? Not being able to finish but a fraction of what I start. And also sometimes I am just not able to convey things how I really wanted them to be.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I know some people get uppity about sprinkling in foreign language in fic dialogue, but, like, there's good ways and bad ways to do it, and sometimes the original language word has no good equivalent in other languages.

First fandom you wrote for? Saiyuki

Favourite fic you've ever written? Hmmm, well, for better or worse Water of Life is my baby and I love it. lol I have some WIPS though, that I am dying to finish and they might eclipse that love.

Tags with zero pressure to @aeide, @madnessmadness, @softest-punk, @myriath, @akashadarkblade

[johnbly]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by the @boltlightning the myth the legend

1. how many total works do you have on ao3? 31

2. what’s your total ao3 word count? 137,304

3. what fandoms do you write for? mostly potc, but i did toss out that one roland fic the other day. also at some point hornblower and his dragon will be published. i promise bolt. i will not abandon justinian. he also likely wouldn't allow me to anyways. he is likely just outside my window at this very second

(putting it the rest under a cut as this is a bit long)

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

a birthday dinner for two (tears of themis)

i would do it again (tot)

partners in everything (tot)

party in the mansion (fe3h)

learning to trust (fe3h)

of the five, learning to trust is definitely my favorite and the one that i think actually deserves the kudos. like not that the others are bad but tot is up there because of fandom popularity and then the other 3h once was for an exchange

5. do you respond to comments? usually!

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? i was gonna put one of the potc fics here but it feels more bittersweet than angsty so i'll return to my hubert and edelgard pov azure moon fic that i remembered from last time (our paths end here)

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i'm p sure last time i did this one i did one of my tot fics which makes sense bc they're basically the only happy ones but i don't think i'd published this one yet? who knows. anyways partners in everything

8. do you get hate on fics? thankfully no but i did get a somewhat rude one that one time

9. do you write smut? only fade to black here and i don't think i've ever posted any of that anyways. don't hold your breath on this changing but also if you're following me expecting that kind of content to begin with you are. in the wrong place

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written? i don't usually but i have done hockey aus for two separate fandoms (3h & pb) so there's that. i wouldn't consider that too crazy though

11. have you had a fic stolen? / 12. have you had a fic translated? / 13. have you ever co-written a fic? keeping these stuck together with a no for me as well. i did do a back and forth writing thing with a former friend but that was for a personal project

14. what's your all-time favorite ship? i am not really a big shipper! i went through my charmed tag the other day so i guess i can say piper/leo bc i was very into them when i was watching. if we can extend ship to being not necessarily romantic then we all know that The Horny Lads have rewritten my brain

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? great question! i can't think of any bc if i don't think i'll ever finish a wip i likely. don't want to finish it

16. what are your writing strengths? i'm good with dialogue especially banter and since i refuse to write fics where i can't get into the head of the pov character i'd like to think my characterization is solid

17. what are your writing weaknesses? society if i could describe things without suffering. i will blame the aphantasia

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i'm not sure i've given it much thought since i haven't done it before. i'd def be scared of messing something up

19. first fandom you wrote for? my first ao3 fic was for pb but i know i did fics before that. i'm gonna guess hp since that was my first fandom

20. favorite fic you've written? look i have to hype this fic up bc it has an audience of like five people but i put a lot of love and time into my fernand character study (the fallen knight)

i tag @writingbyricochet (not sure how much fanfic/ao3 you do since your blog is mostly original worksso feel free to ignore this/adapt as needed) and @philcoulsonismyhero and whoever else wants to do this!

[cinderfeather]

20 Questions For Writers

Yay, thank's for the tag @sinvulkt! I've seen this going round and been hoping to participate.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

21

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

81,221 words! That's basically a novel, although split out across many shorter works.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Almost all my works are Star Wars (Luke & Vader or occasionally prequals Anakin), then DC (Superman). I only have one fic about Superman posted, but I do have quite a few drafts about him.

I also try to write origional works, but I find it a lot harder to create something I feel is as compelling without having 'the iceberg of canon' beneath it. (Granted I've made a lot of progress on trying to write origional works since I started writing fanfic.)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Operation CHEER LUKE UP AFTER BESPIN (Star Wars OT)

282 kudos

This was the first fic I ever posted. I do want to finish this one, but I'm currently facing a challenging plothole, so I keep waiting till I've finished up whatever other WIP I'm working on, and then after finishing a WIP I want a break before coming back to writing a fic again, except that after a break I come up with another WIP idea…

2. Whose Propaganda is it Anyway? (Star Wars OT)

134 kudos

I'm surprised this beat Mistaken Son-dentity, given that it gets quite serious toward the end. But rereading it again I forgot how fun the first part was, and the way the first line eches the last.

3. Mistaken Son-dentity (Star Wars OT)

120 kudos

I love the crack in this one, I often think back on it if I need a way to cheer myself up but don't have access to my Ao3 bookmarks (given that I wrote it it's much easier to play in my head).

4. Skeptics of the Force (Star Wars OT)

119 kudos

I'm very proud of this one. It's the longest thing I've ever finished, and it grew from what I thought would be 7,000 words to 36,000 words. I edit very slowly so that was a Marathon! The plot and foreshadowing was very complex, so by the end it I was playing whack-a-mole with all the inconsistencies.

5. Hide (Star Wars OT)

111 kudos

I'm surprised this one was so well loved, it's very short and I was hesitant to post it because it felt a bit unfinished and like just the start of something. So I'm glad I did!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, occasionally I miss some but in general I try to keep up with them. If someone gives me unsolicited constructive critisim I generally don't reply, but I'm reluctant to delete their comment.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm. So there are several top contenders:

Initially I thought The Haunting of Order-66 might be it, but then I realised that while that was one of the angster ones, it actually had quite a hopeful ending.

Alone is sad, but I don't quite feel it has the gut punch to be the top contender.

Ghost is also pretty up there, but I'd say the ending leans more into horror than 'angst'.

The above two lean into 'not getting there in time', but I think the betrayal in 'Can't Go Home' elevates the angst to another level. (I double-checked The Right Hand of Justice because it Very Much explores betrayal, but the acceptance and teeny tiny thread of hope laced into the end knocks it from first place.)

So Can't Go Home is the winner!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmm. I think Rivers of Lava, Rivers of Life has a beautiful ending.

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

There's a lot of imaginary hate in my head when I'm working through those last few edits before I post something 😅. Occasionally people have said they didn't like some of the ways my characters behaved, but I think it's mostly just being annoyed at them, not at the fic.

9. Do you write smut?

I don't have any posted, but there is some in my drafts. If I edited some I'm not sure if I'd post it under this account or make another I keep separate.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Sort of. I stumbled across the song 'I Know Those Eyes/This Man is Dead' (from The Count of Monte Cristo musical) and instantly went 'This has EPIC Vader/Padme reunion vibes. I promptly went and wrote a fic based on those vibes alone, and then after I finished I watched a film adaptation and read the book so I finally knew what was going on (because I knew if I looked up what was happening before I wrote the fic my perfectionism would get in the way and I'd never end up writing it).

Now, after reading the giant tome that was The Count of Monte Cristo I have an idea for a more accurate crossover called 'The Sith of Monte Cristo,' but (as I predicted) I feel too overwhelmed to write that one.

In addition, when I read Hamlet last year for the first time in my life, I was entranced and sketched out a Luke!Hamlet AU, but I also feel like that might be quite a bit of work so I haven't been motivated enough to write that either.

Finally, The Right Hand of Justice technically falls into the crossover category on Ao3, but it doesn't feel like a myth retelling makes sense to label a 'Crossover'.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

If Ao3 ever been scraped as a dataset into a Large-Language-Model.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet, I can only speak one language. Feel free to offer if you'd like to translate one of mine, though!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Not yet!

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

Um, does 'Superman/anyone' count? I love Clois, but sometimes I wish there were more AUs so it wasn't just Superman/Reporter all the time. I also love a good Clex, the enimies-to-lovers angst is delicious. I am super down for Superbat - it has the double the Identity Shennagins from Clois with a light dose of the Enimies-To-Lovers angst from Clex.

However, this might be weird, but I'm really, really down for Superman/Female Origional Character, just someone fun and quirky and quite fleshed out but a bit different to Lois's personality (because I have read mountains and mountins of Clois and while it's amazing I sometimes get a little bored of the narrowness of reporter life and the 'in love with Superman, in friends with Clark' tropes). I have a few drafts of this, but then I worry that a female OC in fandom won't be very popular so I don't clean them up 😅

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Um. Um. I mean I want to finish 'Cheer Luke Up' and I will, okay, I will. It just could possibly take up to quite a number of years before I get back into it. I'm getting faster at editing, so one day it might not take that much work to finish up. I think it's just past the half-way point at the moment.

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I'm really proud of a lot of the cosmic horror I've done! I think it has a great sense of a slow buildup of dread, and then some really unique and otherworldly horrors, tinged with just the right amount of wonder and awe.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Perfectionism. The initial draft isn't too hard, but it usually takes at a minimum a full week of being mostly focused on it to months for anything above 5k words. It tends to exhaust and frustrate me so much.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Haven't done it yet (unless you count me makeing up stuff that sounds like Latin or outright using Latin in one or two sentences). As long as it fits well, but I think excessive use of it could frustrate the reader.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Wars Origional Trilogy

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Aaaaaahh. I think Stride of Terror is an awesome 'Vader captures Luke' fic, 'Cheer Luke Up' is the silliest, wildest, unhinged crack, Skeptics of the Force gazes into the abyss, and The Sith in Yellow is a really impressive piece of cosmic horror.

I'm going to say Skeptics of the Force, because out of all my fics when I think about how to bind one into a book it's that one that I want the most.

Tag time (if you wish to): @andyboops, @insertmeaningfulusername, @smolavidreader, @overallobsessiveness, @softlysuited, @softieskywalker

[fxshrxfmxn]

How to Request

I have decided that I will write for The Chosen. Maybe a good decision, maybe a bad decision. But here we are.

This seems like overkill right now if I’m honest, but I might thank myself later.

As of this moment, I do not have a masterlist, however, I do tag all of my writings so you can search them and read them all.

Just search:

fxshrxfmxn writings

Or

fxshrxfmxn fanfic

And they should all be made available to you to find relatively easily💖

To make things a bit easier for me and how I want to stay within my beliefs, I’m setting up guidelines for requesting writing from me for The Chosen.

Before I begin, it is important that we all understand that I am writing for the storyline of The Chosen. Each event in The Chosen was either spun by the writers and directors OR pulled from the Bible itself. I am writing for the character that the actors in the show portray, not the real people themselves. The Bible and the Chosen, to me, are separate things and I will be treating them as such. (I am for sure okay with talking about scripture itself, but in a different kind of context.)

Anyways…

With traditionally romantic writings, things tend to be a bit touchy and comfy. That’s fine, I love that. Lord knows, I will be huggy with my future other half before marriage(I don’t think I could just not touch them, luckily our current culture allows for that.)

But the culture in bible time was very different. The parents would arrange with the parents, or the parents would talk to the guy. There wasn’t dating as it is now, certainly not premarital kissing or hugging, not in public anyways, because it was seen as improper. Also pretty much no touching. So, I really want to try and keep things more proper.

In A Misunderstanding (my fic about John the Beloved) I do think that’s the most contact I will allow for “romantic” fics, that I write. Not entirely true to the proper culture back then, but less scandalous, y’know?

(I might budge the line occasionally, but if it doesn’t feel right, I just won’t write it. I will for sure communicate that to the requester.)

That being said, I have only written for John so far, I will write for anyone in the show. I am female, so anything “romantic”, I will only write for the men in the show(anyone BUT Jesus(obviously)), and beyond that if you want just a chill fic about hanging with the Marys and Ramah and Tamar, I can do that. I love writing fanservice, just shenanigans and things of that nature are super fun. Give me a challenge, I love those.

So: Keep it E for everyone, not even PG. Minimal hand holding; maybe a few hugs. No kissing on the mouth and certainly no NSFW. Men and women, who were not married, weren’t allowed to be alone together. So that is the way my fics will be.

(Not telling other people they shouldn’t be writing it, (you write what you like and are comfortable with) I am just setting a personal standard for myself and will be keeping to it.)

I am a female and, as this is already out of my comfort zone, will only be writing from the female perspective.

NO:

-NSFW

-Mouth to Mouth(kissing)(unless it’s a marriage fic, which Idek if I’m comfortable writing that yet)(idk why either so don’t ask)

-No being completely alone with the opposite sex

-if the character is married or already betrothed in the show, please keep the request platonic.

-edit: 10/23 anything same sex romantic is a no as well. I will not change my mind. Any messages/comments will be deleted/reported and you will be blocked if you harass me about it. We can discuss things without those coming into the mix.

YES:

-Shenanigans(practical jokes and things of that nature, family friendly comedy stuff)

- Girl time with the female disciples

-Found family is my favorite trope, so anything about learning to cohabitate in a camp with a bunch of Christ’s followers? Yes, please.

-prompts about Christ accepting you as you are, calling you to follow him and helping you turn from old lifestyles are fics that I think can be very healing. (Things like this I will be discerning on a prompt to prompt basis)

Characters I will write for at least once:

Simon Peter(platonic only please)

Simon Z

Thomas(platonic only please)

Andrew

Matthew(either romantic or platonic for now until we actually figure out where his relationship with Mary is going)

Nathaniel

Thaddeus

Big James

Little James

John the Beloved(of course)

Judas(tentatively because I have a personal bias to get over(I had always thought of him as the villain(which isn’t the case))

Philip

Any of the girls(Mary, Mary M., Ramah, Tamar, Eden, Salome)(platonic only please)

Jesus(platonic only please(I shouldn’t have to say that, but there’s always someone)

Potentially Quintus, Atticus, and/or Gaius(platonic only please) (I would actually prefer platonic for all three, but I will use discernment on a prompt by prompt basis.)

TL;DR: Every prompt that comes to me, I will use my own discernment for whether I am comfortable or not with writing it, all I ask is that you be respectful if your prompt is not answered the way you want it to be. If you request something that goes against everything on the “NO” list, your request will be discarded, so I recommend you at least read that bit.

Tutorial on how to request anything from me:

Use the ask button! Or send me a message! Both are located in the upper right hand corner for mobile. I don’t use a computer, so I’m not sure where those buttons are at on the computer.

I also prefer dialogue prompts have at least two bits of dialogue and a genre with it, just for a bit more guidance on what you want.

Will do headcanons, but if you could say whether you want separate headcanons or just a group headcanon so that I give you exactly what you want and don’t have to guess, that’d be great.

I love you so much because Jesus loves you so much and wants the best for you. I respect you as a person, the way Jesus respects you and ask that you extend me the same courtesy.

Blessings to each and every one of you. 💗✨🫶🏻