#snowpiercer theories

[icebreaker01]

You had ONE job!

(Author stands in front the group tasked with killing Nima. Behind the author is a white board on which is a picture of a short stick figure with glasses, a messy drawing of hair on top and could be a body double for a platypus and no one would know the difference.) (Author snaps a pointer on the picture.) "You SEE this?! You see what it looks like!?" (Snaps the pointer over to a second stick figure on the white board which is much taller, has a neat head of hair and could double as a telephone pole.) "And you see THIS!?" (Pauses) "Can ANYONE P.L.E.A.S.E. explain to me how you can possibly MISTAKE the two?" (Group member 1) "It was dark?" "This whole show has looked like it was filmed in a mile deep bunker where they forgot to pay the electric bill. Try again." (Group member 2) "He had his back to us?" (Author angerly taps the two pictures again.) "Height alone should have been a tip off!" (Group member 3) "He was leaned over!" "Even at waist high he was still taller than that little weasel!" "Just a minute! Why are you so upset? You didn't like the character anyway. Why are you so upset about what happened to him?" "Because his 'sacrifice' made no sense whatsoever. Now get out there and try again!" (Author stands at the door and hands out 5X7 glossy's as they leave.)

And yes, folks, I am more than a little peeved at how they wrote Bennett Knox's character out of the show. The scene was poorly thought out by the writers and once again, I wish they would get off the crack. Now, having read ahead in this show, I have a bit of insight into things that are going to happen. And each character demise thus far has left me sitting in front of my TV thinking "Whattttttt?" I was fine with Zarah being written off. She was a self-serving little so-and-so from the start. Good riddance. But lets take a look at their latest 'It's the last season, lets see what we can do for shock value' action. 1. Did the trains need to be separated RIGHT THEN! No. This was a poorly contrived plot point. 2. What? Big Alice doesn't have ONE, single survival suit? You couldn't take five seconds of film time to slip his skinny little butt into it? And it isn't like he doesn't know about them! He's spent 50% of the series in one. I swear, I think the character sleeps in one he loves them so much. 3. The most important people on the trains are the engineers. Yet THESE are the characters you choose to write off the show? What? Did Bennett 'MacGyver' Knox run out of ideas suddenly. You're asking me to believe that a man who could come up with all the fun little tricks he has thus far in the show, could think of NOTHING better than to walk out into freezing cold weather to uncouple a train car? Sirs, you both insult and tax my level of disbelief. 4. Poor Melanie now has no one to talk science to except the smarmy little weasel. And talking to Nima is like talking to a Schizophrenic who has been off his meds for a month. And believe me folks, in my line of work, I know a thing or two about what this looks like. (Holds up a picture of Nima.) 5. Standing at the door, after the cars were uncoupled, Bennett was still alive. What? Did 99% of his brain freeze first and he didn't think, 'Hey, I can turn around and run back into the train!'. Instead he just STOOD there and froze? (See end of item 3 comment.) 6. In the 'The writers have no idea what their doing' column, I would like to point out that if you know anything about living up north, it is not for a fashionable look that people wear scarfs wrapped around their noses outside in 12 degree weather. If you don't, your lungs freeze LONG before the rest of you does. Why? Because of the moisture in them. Executing people on the train by strapping a mask on them with a tube leading to the outside took what?.....30 seconds? Yet Bennett had time to run down a corridor with no more protection than a winter coat and gloves, uncouple a train car, then stand back up and admire the view. Why did he not turn his skinny little butt around instead and run back up said corridor and into the train? This whole scene just made no sense.

Here's what I think happened: (The following is the author's interpretation of what happened at the end of S4E5.) (In the writers trailer, they are staring at names pinned to the wall, deciding who they can legitimately write off the show before the end and still have enough characters left to have an end.) (Iddo Goldberg walks into the trailer.) "Hi, guys. Look, I have a slight problem." "What is it? We're busy." "Well, I have another opportunity with this new show that's starting filming in a few weeks, and I....sort of need off the train." "Done! Have a nice life." "Thanks, guys. You're the best." (Goldberg leaves and the writers quickly smile at each other.) "Gone by the halfway point?" "No problem."

And I understand this was suppose to be a 7 seasons show, and the writers are annoyed because they had this great storyboard already planned out and now they have to cram everything into ten episodes. It bites. But could you at least leave a few main characters alive? And I would do a revised 'Who makes it and who doesn't' list. But due to my getting out my trusty shovel and digging into sites where people post who have seen the entire season already, I can't do this anymore. But in regards to the original list I made and how wrong it is.......I'm amazed.

One last word of warning, folks. Be sure in the next 1-2 episodes to have a thick layer of towels set under your TV screen. Because when Melanie finds out what happened to Bennett......well, we all know how that goes. And it will surely be...messy.

[redsolon]

Proudhon said exactly this shit.

"The spirit of rapine and greed is the true characteristic of the modern epoch: the poor exploit the rich, the workers their employers, the tenant his landlord, the company promoter his shareholders, no less than the capitalist exploits and puts pressure on the industrialist, the industrialist his workers and the landlord his tenants."

-- Pierre-Joseph Proudhon: His Revolutionary Life, Mind and Works by E Hyams

This is what no class analysis does to a motherfucker. Vague criticism of "the system" but no analysis of its logic, and no plan for confrontation. Any time I run into a self-proclaimed "radical" squeamish about confrontation, thinking the bourgeois state can be ignored because they're just smol beans--any time I run into someone with a purely critical, vague "anti-authoritarian" ideology--I think, "Ah, Proudhon yet lives!" It was insufficient for the Paris Commune, and it's insufficient now. Anarchism becoming a primarily communistic and syndicalist movement is the only reason it still has any influence today at all. Marx saved them from Proudhon.

Kay and Skittles did a video on Bong Joon-Ho's politics, and he gets at the heart of the problem with his worldview. (Kay and Skittles has perfected the art of using media analysis for actual, solid political education. All his stuff is great.)

if i had to materialize the epitome of petite bourgeoise intellectual's high horse attitude when it comes to class struggle it would be bong joon-ho talking about parasite (and his film itself)

[thezombieprostitute]

Tech Tuesday: Curtis

Summary: Curtis decides to take the next step and ask if you're willing to meet offline.

A/N: Reader is female. No physical descriptors used.

Warnings: Meeting someone from online, Mentions of past bad experiences. Please let me know if I missed any.

Part 1

Series Masterlist

It's 2 o'clock and you're at the library. Your friend, Cassandra, works the reference desk here so she's holding onto your computer, and you'll have an escape if things with Snowpiercer/Curtis go south. You've also packed your mace and Cassandra was nice enough to let you park in her usual spot in the library lot so you could sneak out the back if needed.

Part of you feels ridiculous for being so cautious about someone you've been talking to online for a couple years now, but you can't let go of the "what if". You're genuinely hoping it goes well, you really are, but it never hurts to be careful. Especially after last time.

You shake your head. No, you're not going to think about Chase again. He doesn't deserve the time and energy involved in thinking about him. And already Curtis was showing himself to be not like him. He suggested going to a public space for a first meeting. He didn't pressure you to say "yes" to this meeting. And he didn't argue with you, at all, about the time and place.

He also didn't argue when you asked him to send a photo of himself without sending one of yourself to him. You're fairly certain the photo is really him, but those eyes look too beautiful to not be touched up a bit. At least the rest of him lined up with things he'd told you about himself previously. Pierced lip, beard, buzzcut. Maybe the lighting just really highlighted the eyes.

Curtis had arrived at the cafe a half hour early. He'd parked as close as he could in case he needed to take the computer home. He was hopeful he could fix it here with his laptop, but it would be nice to have an excuse to meet you again.

He was worried you wouldn't show up at all. He tried to acquiesce to your requirements for meeting up but that doesn't guarantee you'll be here. For all he knows, he's the one being catfished. But with how long the two of you have been talking, the gradual building of trust on both sides, he's hopeful. He's not usually the type to give in to hope, but you changed that.

Curtis can't help but continue looking around as people come and go, wondering if one of them is you. You'd told him you'd be wearing your scrubs but maybe you were scouting him out first, making sure he was who he said he was. You'd told him that you'd had bad experiences meeting in person before. It was a big part of why he was going so far out of his way to accommodate your requests. He'd had to clock out of work early, though it also saved him from having to argue with Bucky about the legacy code. He'd driven all the way across town to the main branch of the library. He just really wanted this all to go well.

A beautiful woman in scrubs walks up to the counter and orders a drink. Curtis wants to go up and ask if it's you but he stays put. He doesn't need you to walk in on him trying to talk to someone else. His knee starts bouncing because of his nerves. The woman gets her coffee and walks over to his table.

"Hello, Curtis," you say.

"Hello, Heart," he smiles.

Part 1

Series Masterlist

Tagging @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory; @late-to-the-party-81; @lokislady82 ; @peyton-warren @ronearoundblindly; @stellar-solar-flare

[thekenobee]

Me listening to Snowpiercer theories for the next month-

[melcavills]

theory time

(i’ve not watched the entirety of season 4, i’m kinda following the airing schedule so i’m on 4.08, so if you do know how it ends please don’t leave any spoilers or hints in the comments or tags)

we know the gemini compound is gonna practically make the earth radioactive, and the goal is to prevent nima from launching it in the atmosphere.

from some promos we do know that one rocket does appear to be launched (which is the type of too-spoilery thing that really shouldn’t be included in any promotional material, as visually cool as it may look, but whatever atp it’s the least we can expect from this season).

i’m pretty sure though the whole point about the soldiers stealing snowpiercer was so that they could launch multiple rockets across the earth.

so here’s the point: in episode 4.08, while talking to alex, nima refers to it as the rocket, singular, which is kinda confusing considering the whole premise of it all.

all this to say i’m gonna be really fucking pissed if they actually make it so that that one single rocket is gonna be everyone’s doom. also because they could’ve had nima finish the compound and launch it from the silo without any need for the train if it’s so powerful that only one’s gonna be enough to cover the whole atmosphere.

not to mention that if they took my perfect happy s3 series finale away just to give me some kind of moralizing tragic “everyone dies because of humanity’s carelessness about climate change and its hubris thinking they could cheat their way into fixing it somehow”-bullshit istg… i don’t even have the words to express how cheap it would be, so tragically so that it could go all the way around and be hilarious to watch honestly.

if they were smarter than i think they are they would probably make it so that new eden won’t be inhabitable anymore so they’ll all have to go off on the trains again, facing the uncertainty of an increasingly damaged train and tracks (which could have also been a viable ending point if they thought they were gonna have more seasons like i’ve been told they did, but idk if they went back and rewrote a definitive ending upon learning that it was actually the final season).

[pupkinpumpkin]

Bro I was rewatching the Tim Burton Willy Wonka movie (just to get it out here and now, Tim Burton's is my favorite Wonka movie cause I grew up with it, but Gene Wilder is the best Wonka in my eyes followed closely by Christian Borle) and I was thinking of how utterly disappointed I am going to be with the new Wonka movie

Now you may think I'm going to be disappointed because of Timothée Chalamet being Wonka and because it's a cheap cash grab, and you're sort of right about that

Timothée Chalamet is a good actor, but he's not insane enough to play the iconic role as other Tumblr users have put it, and it is most likely a story that has no heart in it, but that's not the main reason I'm upset with it

The original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie is about Charlie, while the 2005 remake Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is about Wonka, so I think it is incredibly insulting that they do not continue this joke and make the new Willy Wonka movie all about Charlie

You think I'm joking but I'm not

I mean, the movie probably has no heart whatsoever, so why not at least make it a shitty sequel and let us keep joking about the mix up? The movie could be about Charlie trying to live up to Willy Wonka's image, balancing work and home life, the stresses of OSHA violations, building a gigantic classist train for when the world freezes over and starting to use kids from the poorest and most overpopulated part of the train to keep it running after all the needed tools have been used throughout the years (go see the Snowpiercer theories on YouTube for that last one)

One could argue that Timothée Chalamet could make a much better older Charlie than a Wonka and he looks slightly like that kid in the Tim Burton version.

Kinda.

Im actually not all that good at recognizing facial features, so someone can correct me on that if they look literally nothing alike

But the point is, it's a better option, at least to me, than what they have now and will try and do after they (hopefully) give writers and actors what they deserve if they aren't that big of assholes

Literally all they need to do is strike it and reverse it

I'm not saying I want an older Charlie movie, but I at least want to keep the joke running, and the fact it's gonna get ruined for a movie that has a high possibility of being shit is really annoying to me

Anyway, night

[spearxwind]

Actually my favorite conspiracy theory is the one that was like "charlie and the chocolate factory takes place in the same universe as snowpiercer"

[must-be-mythtaken]

sure I'll buy that

[sol1loqu1st]

unfortunately i've given too much context for this train of thought (was thinking about the tim burton stuff i actually liked, remembered his terrible charlie and the chocolate factory adaptation, etc) but sometimes i think about the "snowpiercer is a sequel to charlie and the chocolate factory" theory and lose my mind again. did you guys watch that video or am i alone in my insanity

[icebreaker01]

Predictions for S4E10

So here we sit, fellow Snowpiercer fans. On the eve of the last episode of our beloved show. I am practically already sitting in my chair, a blanket, a bowl of popcorn, and a bottle of horse tranquilizers in my lap……..W….A….I….T….I….N….G………..!

HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY THINK I WOULD NOT DO PREDICTIONS FOR THIS???????????????????? Also, it give me something to do beside go to Utube and watch all the Episode 10 reviews there. (This should not be allowed, UTube!)

So let’s get into it.

First off, a moment of silence for Hula Girl. (Pause…………) Her passing was as senseless as the rest have been. Well, except. Millus……I kinda enjoyed that one. Shame on you, Snowpiercer writers!!!!!!!!! What did Hula Girl ever do to you?!

Also, just to start this out on a positive note (because heaven knows there are not a lot to follow), in an interview Jennifer Connelly did state very clearly, and with a lot of room open for interpretation, that the fandom would be ‘satisfied’ with the ending. Well, I do not know what ruler you use for measuring ‘satisfaction’ Ms. Connelly, but mine looks like this; No more characters I actually give a *&$^% about are ‘put off the train’. Snowpiercer happily keeps running around the globe looking for lost colonies of people and brings them happily back to New Eden, without them trying to take over the train in the process. The people who we saw standing next to the tracks as the train pulled out of New Eden going “WWWHHHHAAAAATTTTTTT??????” are all safe and sound and the colony survived despite that it’s power source just left town. And regarding New Eden….., WHY are there mud puddles everywhere? It is still below the freezing point. The rocket, with adjustments made in the chemical agent by Melanie, manages to do what it is suppose to do, NOT rip the atmosphere off the planet (which, just as a side note, folks, could happen to us at any given moment in time due to a long ago, distance star exploding. Did you know that?). Due to said rocket doing what it should do (NOT killing us all), it starts the chain reaction around the world, the planet starts to warm up, and that is the epilog for the series.

Should these things not come to pass, Ms. Connelly, I can promise one very angry letter from a disappointed fan. Now, not the ‘I know where you live’ sort of letter. More the ‘How could you lie to us?’ letter.

Anywho; Predictions time! Did anyone else catch what I think was the biggest give away in episode 9 in foreshadowing E10? Alex asked her mother if, to distract Nima, they didn’t just bring him down to the retrofit chamber to look around……or whatever. Melanie responded “No. The last thing we want is him coming down here.” One question. Why? So here’s the theory; Crazy mad scientist Nima has been foolishly allowing Melanie to work on the retrofitting project alone. Unsupervised. Now we all know by now, four seasons into this series, that allowing Melanie to do anything, especially anything involving science, unsupervised, just flies in the face of “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!?!?!”

Onetrainsnowpiercer put a post up once that went like this: Bennett (moment of silence): I left instructions for everyone while I’m gone. Melanie: Mine just says “Melanie no.” Bennett (moment of silence): I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

And THAT, folks, is how you handle an engineer. Not handing them a screwdriver and saying “Have fun!”.

Next, a little something I like to call ‘The writers yanking our chain’. If you were still in a mind enough to watch the preview for E10, AND focus on anything after that little whirlwind of an episode, you would have caught the scene (possibly) of the Tailies standing around and Ruth in the back. In that little three second clip, Ruth clearly says “Layton’s dead?” Now, I heard it as a question, not a statement. Do I give it any credibility? No. Why? Folks, they already put Zarah off the train (so to speak), are they seriously going to leave poor little Liana an orphan? I mean, the writers got to put Hula Girl off the train in a senseless, shocking, explosive manner. WASN’T THAT ENOUGH TO SATISFY YOUR INNATE BLOODLUST, YOU FILTHY, INSENSITIVE, HACK-WRITING BASTARDS!!!????????

(There will be a brief pause while the tranquilizer dart takes effect.)

Several reasons I believe this.

You bastards already had your shot at Layton. You missed. Hahaha.

See above.

Layton is shown in practically every clip of the preview. That man gets around! Hard to hit a moving target.

Ms. Connelly promised us a ’satisfying’ ending. If Layton is ‘put off the train‘, Ms. Connelly, I am not satisfied!

If Layton is ’put off the train’ how can my Laytonie ship ever keep sailing?

This man is surely not out of stupid ideas yet.

Who will Ruth bully around for his stupid ideas if Layton is ’put off the train’? Do I think there is a small possibility? Yes. Why?

Layton asked Roche to look after Liana if anything happens to him. Too much foreshadowing for my liking there.

Daveed Digg’s costs a lot of money. Writers wanted to get rid of him, if even for just a few minutes of screen time at the end.

Shock value. Need I say more for this season?

With that said; Who do I think will survive? Melanie - Duh. Why? Because she’s made it this far. ‘Putting her off the train’ at this point is…….pointless. Also, humanity will clearly be ‘put off the train’ without her. Especially when you look at what is left of humanity in this series. Also, Alex deserves to have her mother. They can tie her father to the rocket for all I care. Melanie as been through enough, lets let the character have a happy ending. And lastly, Jennifer Connelly promised us a ‘satisfying’ ending. Alex - why have her mother survive and not her…..and vice-versa. Roche (and his lunchbox) - they had their shot at him….twice. Done. Boki - he’s just too darned cute to ‘put off the train’ now that he‘s sane and talking again. Javi - You need engineers to survive. Plus, somehow in this season he managed to grow a backbone and some character….all in one season! Sykes - Javi needs someone to love, too. Till - See my last post for rules about killing off the last gay couple on the planet. Audry - See above. Everyone left in the Silo - Because why wouldn’t they? They’ve survived for seven years, after all. (Unless this is where the show ‘Silo’ picks up, then it just plain gets weird.) Ruth - because she’s Ruth. And someone needs to keep Layton and his pervasively dumb ideas in line. Melanie will be on the train, after all, looking for other survivors. That leash can only be yanked from so far away. Oz - if that little &%^$&^$^$&#&()^$^&*&%^# could survive this long, I don’t see much hope for him being ‘put off the train’ in the near future. Wilford - Hope springs eternal! Josie - Because she actually got interesting in this season. Miles - I’ve said it a hundred times, you don’t kill kids. Tristan - Because he’s just too dang boring to bother with. Lights - Because she showed up every now and then with a good idea and deserves a mention, if not to survive. Dr. Pelton - You need doctors. Polar bears - I believe showing a polar bear at the end would be a lovely head-nod to the movie.

Who do I not care if they ‘put off the train’ or not: Dr. Headwood - good riddance, you weird little ^$%$&%&.

Who do they need to ‘put off the train’ for me to call this a ‘satisfying’ ending: Nima (And just a little side comment here, folks. Did anyone ever take a look at the actor that plays the insane little mad scientist? WOW! That’s one heck of a makeup job!)

And it’s too bad they didn’t start running Season 4 in place of season 3. If they had, this show might have survived. Because season 4, with the sole exception we got Melanie back in season 3, blew that one right out of the frozen water.

So, happy viewing, folks………………………we can only hope.

[bitethebullets]

my two favorite movie theories gotta be the saw/home alone and the willy wonka/snowpiercer ones

[hexabeast]

Nothing will top Rhino Stew's crack theory that Snowpiercer is a Willy Wonka sequel and quite frankly that makes the former so much more enjoyable to me as a result.

[hanavesinauttija]

If you have one, would you go on a dump about 2013 Snowpiercer? I've seen so much abt it but since you brought it up I'm curious if you have any thoughts

I don't have any enlightening takes on the movie that you won't find from people better qualified to analyze movies. It presents the train being a metaphor for capitalism and class structure damn near explicitly.

Spoilers for Snowpiercer (2013) below; watch the movie first, it's good.

The unwashed masses are consigned to the end of the train, where the upper class woman makes sure to remind them of their place. She claims that the idea of them being treated better to being as ridiculous as a boot being worn on the head. Compare the scene where she places the boot on the punished man's head to the classic iconography of upper classes treading on the working class.

A hero of the people leads the masses on a coup, which results in a huge amount of death. Throughout their journey, the lead character never considers whether his mission is good and right; he never questions whether the train itself is necessary. The only people who do are the engineer and his daughter, to whom the engineer teaches about life before the train.

In the end, the lead character is posed to become the conductor, or the highest authority in the train. He's going to become a new leader, instead of breaking the system that necessitates the cruelty he's had to live through. His view is always the front of the train vs the back of the train. But, the engineer knows there is another option; he blows up the side of the train and derails it.

Throughout the movie, there are constant reminders that there is no life outside the train. Despite this, the engineer and his daughter see a polar bear when they step out. It will be difficult, but it is possible to live outside the train (capitalism) despite what the conductor (the elite class) have told the people at the back of the train (the proletariat).

There's also a fan theory that the movie is a sequel to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It's surprisingly convincing.

[alicewhimzy]

This. All of this.

Me being fed up with stupid pointless edgy Wonka headcanons 😠😒

(rant and disturbing subject matter underneath) 🍫🎩🏭

It's not the jokes and playing around I hate, it's the fact that some idiots actually take those fan theories seriously. I hate it.

From assuming he planned everything like it's saw, to assuming the kids died when we see in the book they live and in almost every adaptation (every good one for sure) it's plausible they lived, to laser-focusing on the lost chapters and overblowing them out of proportion, to bringing up Dahl's original stupid design for the Oompa-loompas, as if modern adaptations didn't already fix this and future adaptations can't do even better, to venting frustrations about insert-asshole-who-happens-to-be-rich-here and just painting Wonka's name on top, even though without him Charlie and his family would have starved to death, and also he was impoverished and tricked into indentured servitude in the prequel, to claiming that FUCKING SNOWPIERCER IS A SEQUEL, cause it's not like the book already has a sequel, besides Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium fits much better, to straight up lying about characters and events, to pretty much piling on as much shocking shit as possible with murder and cannibalism and pedophilia and then acting like that's canon and condemning the story and characters for what they made up, to claiming that Wonka is literally Satan, no really someone actually did that, and way too much more! I HATE IT!

wtf. What is wrong with them? I am so angry about this.

At this point I'm convinced that to idiots like that, Wonka as a whole is a bitch-eating-crackers™, and nothing that's actually good will satisfy them because their standards are warped. The kind of idiots who hated the Wonka prequel because it was more accurate to Wonka's actual persona. The character that they want and are taking seriously, a homicidal maniac who murders and eats children and god only knows what else, has had so many changes that at this point they're looking at a completely different character, one who's nothing like Willy Wonka at all. god I'm tired.

AAAARGH!

[nysocboy]

Kurt Ostland: the Disney Channel's Slab grows up and beefs up

Mr. Young (2011-13), on Disney XD, featured Brendan Meyer as a genius who graduates from college at age 15 and, instead of taking a professorship at MIT and working on the string theory of the universe, becomes a high school science teacher.  In standard teencom style, he has a best friend, a crush, and a bully -- all students at the school -- and hilarity ensues.  And a lot of tongue-lolling, jaw-dropping "Girl of My Dreams" heteronormative ideology

But it wasn't totally execrable. There was a gay-subtext bromance between the buddies, and the bully Slab (Kurt Ostlund) only expressed heterosexual interest once.  Plus he had some gender-atypical traits that key in to gay stereotypes.

I've checked the adult careers of the three main male actors, and it looks like Slab is the only one with gay potential.  So let's take a look:

But then he went full-on bear to play gay-vague or "no expression of heterosexual interest" characters, such as a comic book fan who is targeted by a ghost for stealing important issues in an episode of Supernatural (2018).

Soldiers in Project Blue Book (2019) and The Terror (2019).

Strong Boy in 15 episodes of Snowpiercer (2020-2022), about a train that carries the last survivors of humanity after the world becomes a frozen wasteland.  He is brain-addled from his trauma, but eventually recovers, joins the resistance (there's always a resistance), and sacrifices himself to save his friends.

A Christmas romcom, Mistletoe Connection (2023), but Markian Tarasiuk gets the Girl. Kurt plays his gay best friend.

How to Rob a Bank (2024) is a documentary about Scott Scurlock, who robbed 19 banks in Seattle during the 1990s. Kurt plays Mark Biggins, his guilt-ridden accomplice in several of the robberies. I can't tell from the plot synopsis if they were a gay couple, but no girlfriends appear.

Kurt fills his instagram with bodybuilding photos, and has perfected the gay clone look

The full post is on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends