#anyway happy 4 years of canon destiel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[aerialworms-art]

Saw this post by @chapeldean a couple years ago and wanted to illustrate these two idiots yearning two feet apart cause they are gay. All the text is from chapeldean's post!

(ID under cut)

[Image ID: A five page black and white Destiel comic. Each image is one page.

Page 1: Cas, shirtless, lying in bed, looking off to one side, thinks: devastatingly handsome. ………….. devastatingly handsome?

Dean, also lying in bed, wearing a ratty t-shirt and looking in the other direction, thinks: i love you…. i love all of you— i love you?

They roll over at the same time, both saying: i don’t want to make this weird….

The 'camera' pans out to reveal they're both lying in Dean's bed in his bunker bedroom, facing each other.

Page 2: Dean says: you go first

Cas looks down at his hand on the blanket between them and says: oh. uh. so when i said i loved you. i meant i love you all. like a family

Dean pauses, then says: ok.

Page 3: Dean looks off to the side, away from Cas, and says: that’s good no that’s what i thought you meant. awesome. and when i said you were handsome.

He turns towards Cas and waves a hand dismissively as he says: i meant that as a friend. you know as a best friend, but really there’s nothing wrong with the way you look, man, seriously, you’ve uh. you’ve got it

Cas looks dubious as he says: thank you. i think

Dean doesn't look convinced either but says: yeah no worries.

Page 4: They stare into each other's eyes and the tension grows. Dean blushes, Cas frowns.

Then Dean turns over to put his back to Cas, faking a grin, and says: glad we cleared that up! we should sleep now

Cas looks disappointed, his left hand outstretched, lying on the blanket between them.

Dean pretends to sleep. Cas rolls onto his back, his left hand fisted over his heart on his chest: yes.

Page 5 is completely black, with white text: goodnight dean.

All the pages are marked at the bottom with the following text in light grey: 'original text/idea by @chapeldean' and 'art by @aerialworms' /End ID]

[soullessjack]

listen i get your frustration about how people treat jack, i hate when people reducd him down to just a destiel baby too. but as an autistic person myself, i really disagree with you calling people that like baby jack ableist. he's canonically 4 years old and had to have his childhood basically stripped away from him due to how dangerous it was. i don't think people enjoying the thought of him getting to have that chance at a happy childhood is as cruel and evil as you seem to think.

hi, I’m actually going to answer this differently than I did at first, because I feel like I missed the point and spent way too much time on the canon logistics of “giving Jack a childhood that he chose to skip and is never shown to want,” or that he’s actually pretty obviously portrayed as a teenager in the show, or that his character fundamentally revolves around autonomy & the struggle to have it, and not enough on the actual ableism. I’m also going to be a lot meaner this time, sorry.

honestly, you don’t get my frustrations. you don’t get that this isn’t some petty fandom drama about “muh fav being misunderstood” or “grr this content bad.” you don’t get my frustration if you think that’s all there is to any of this. this is something with an actual bearing on reality and the entire topic of representation in general, which you’d get if you took your head out of your ass and looked around for once. autistic people are still immensely underrepresented and misrepresented in most mainstream media. we are still seen and treated as circus animals, as punchlines, as lesser humans if not subhumans, and we have to face that alongside navigating a world that is wholly and systemically unnavigable to us. fiction and fandoms are an escape for many people, but especially marginalized people who long for community and representation.

the autistic community has a pretty long history of resonating with nonhuman characters in fiction over time, from robots to aliens to monsters in horror movies. because whether it’s their mannerisms or specific struggles or even narrative experiences, they resonate with us. jack resonates with us. he’s important to us as autistic people—and namely, as autistic adults who very rarely see ourselves represented in ways that don’t depict us as gross man-children, infantilized precious beans or emotionless geniuses. in fact, the very notion that autistic people are inherently childlike or mentally children directly leads into our sole representation being children, and even more into the treatment of us as “precious small beans.” does that ring any fucking bells to you yet?

jack might not have been intentionally written with autism or representation on mind, but this fandom literally builds itself up on coding and unintentional implications. he was also confirmed to be autistic anyways, so anyone still whining should just grow the fuck up about it. also, ironically, most accidentally autistic characters end up being the best kind lmao. but these discussions? these analyses by autistic fans —and even just fans who actually care about his complexities — only exist within our own little circles, and the idea of baby!jack is very much the fandom’s steadfastly going mainstream version of him—so much so that people are convinced it’s actually canon, they die on that hill like it’s some obligation to uphold. and any viewing of his canon character with nuance or complexity, or even his basic personality, is left to gather dust. it stops becoming people having fun when it’s over-saturating and supersedes actual canon. it stops becoming people having fun when it’s actually fucking harmful.

it’s frustrating as a general fan, but downright upsetting as an autistic fan who sees themself in him and has to witness every fucking day — in a community that prides itself on being a big found family no less — the infantilization of traits I and other autistic people express, and the stubborn justification of him being “actually a toddler” with even more autistic traits. There are literal scraps of canon adult Jack content to engage with; of any semi-intelligent thoughts on him to indulge in.

what you don’t get (or you refuse to get) that there is a direct correlation between all of this, the way jack is treated (ie ‘reduced to a destiel baby’) and the ableist infantilization surrounding his character. as in, this content directly feeds into his treatment, which then feeds back into the content made of him, which then feeds back again into his treatment in a horrible and exhausting cycle.

what you don’t get is that constantly regurgitating content where the baseline is jack being actively stripped of his identity and autonomy for the sake of becoming an accessory to Destiel/Sastiel/the Domestic Winchester Family is inherently rooted in layers of deep ableist rhetoric, and you can perpetuate all of that even without any intent for it. I’m not a fucking moron, and I’m not the big bad guy you’re talking to me like. I don’t think anyone who enjoys baby!jack is inherently “cruel” or “evil,” or turning jack into a baby while thinking “this’ll stick one to those retards,” and twirling their moustache, okay? and it’s really so funny to me that you’re trying to point the finger back at me. at least you tried.

what you don’t get is that whenever autistic fans voice our perspective on baby!jack, we’re fucking ignored. we’re fed the same rotten slop over and over and over again. “But we want him to be happy!” “But it’s an AU, it’s not canon!” “But he actually is a baby because XYZ!” “But, but!” Buts are not an argument, they’re the thing you still haven’t found a way to pull your heads out of. maybe the lack of oxygen from so many people in one small dark space is why you’re so fucking stubborn to understand this.

you wanna know what is cruel? being told that you are doing something hurtful, something harmful and something that painfully reflects real life struggles a real community goes through, and shrugging it off. being aware of the value something brings to someone else, and stripping it away simply because it doesn’t matter to you personally. finding another But or a corner-cut to excuse yourself from blame. you didn’t have the decency to listen when general fans said “hey this is kind of annoying can we treat him like an actual person,” and you don’t even have the decency to concede when autistic people are saying this is a deeply wrong thing to do.

if you have to ignore an entire community’s voice to feel better about the content you’re making that directly hurts them, if you don’t personally think it’s harmful or even real because autistic struggles are never real, then I am well within reason to assume you’re not a good person. it’s one thing to do something wrong because you’re uninformed, and it’s another thing entirely to continue to do that when you’ve been informed, and simply decided that it wasn’t worth changing or stopping.

believe me, as an autistic person I am well used to being isolated, to not being anyone’s priority in this capitalistic circle of hell. I am ready to expect my struggles and existence to be tokenized for somebody else to feel good, or squeeze money from. Im used to seeing movies portray my experience as some Manic Pixie Star-seed or creepy overgrown child. I know the world doesn’t care about me. But I don’t think I’m asking too much for this, the big found family fandom that’s been shown to care so much about every other problem, to care about me. To listen when it’s hurting me, or uplift something I care about.

I don’t think I’m asking for anything less than this family to actually treat me like I am part of it. But can you even do that?

[roublardise]

tag game - 20 questions for fic writers

YAAAY thank you for the tag @dogearedheart i love talking about my own stuff 💕

i'm unlocking some secret fanfic facts about myself that only two people know about!!

.

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

17 i can't believe it.... only 6 on my spn pseud which is my main one at this point

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

107 433 😳

3. what fandoms do you write for?

i only write for spn rn. the 11 other ao3 fics are from my vld era, and they keep getting kudos it means so much to me.... tho it's not my best works lmao i'm glad it still resonates with some people especially bc i wrote them for trans & autistic teenagers and like, you go ily

now, here's the secret facts: before ao3 and writing fics in english, i wrote many things in french. my main fandoms were Yuri!!! on Ice (i was in the french trenches!!) and Notre-Dame de Paris (the book & musical)

4. top five fics by kudos

i'm done taking the vld fics into account, so it's only spn stats:

You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect

It's new - the shape of your body

The Way Home

amidst ashes and feathers

here come the fallen, here come the failed ones

5. do you respond to comments?

i can't really say i do 😔 i TRY to, and sometimes i DO!! i used to reply to some on ff.net and i loved discussing with readers & other writers, but it's very time consuming and i already don't get much writing time anymore

so i take a while especially to longer comments bc i wanna give it justice? idk. i already struggle a lot with responding to my besties' texts so yeh ao3 comments aren't my priority unfortunately. they do mean everything to me and i screenshot them and read them and reread them and read them again like 😭😭

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm i think it's my unfinished french Yuri!!! on Ice fic lmao. the ending is still in the drafts but it's very bittersweet bc the main relationship doesn't like, fall in love together and all. i play with that trope of "i'm not gonna fall in love!! *does anyway*" with an aro character and they will not, in fact, fall in love.

but the other character will with someone else and so it's this change of relationship that can get pretty heartbreaking still, bc something is still ending. well, more like evolving into smth else but a huge part of what they've shared is kinda lost and it's sad (<- fic written by a situationship survivor)

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

amidsts ashes and feathers TO ME!!! The Way Home's pretty happy as well but blablabla they kiss romance whatever, it's an easy answer.

now my Mary's fic is about finding community and she starts to collect every part of herself to be herself and she finally feels welcome somewhere 💕 pretty open ending and it's not much about reconnecting with dean & sam it's about taking steps yipeee

8. do you get hate on fics? i haven't gotten any so far!

not a big enough fanfic writer for this

9. do you write smut?

i've never done it in english.... YET 😏 if/when i drop my bela x meg you'll see. things happen!

i can't really say i've done it in french either tbh bc i never went super explicit but i did write many kinky scenes at this point so it's like. very sensual at least.

10. craziest crossover?

i don't do crossovers

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

not by someone else, but i've translated a few of my own things from french to english!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes!! i wrote a three-chapter thingy with @littlehaize that i think we deleted bc it was 10 years ago LMAO. it was very fun to do!

14. all-time favorite ship?

well...... no one will ever be destiel. however it's a fanfic ask and i do not write them much, so my fondness goes for sapphic ships and ships that are not canon. always been a rarepair girlie (gn)

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh for sure my dean & sam portraits. i had actually started a kind of sequel to You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect, that was like, "From the same soil we've grown and yet he doesn't know"

GOOD stuff in there, but it was back in 2021. since then my spn takes have changed so even if i took it back up i'd have to rewrite it from scratch + i'm not super interested in it anymore. i started this at a specific time in my life, and now i'm onto new things, different issues, same themes but different takes!

16. what are your writing strengths?

poetic prose!! it's about creating emotions and imageries.... lots of my fics are character studies for a reason, i just like exploring ideas and that's what i've been doing for the longest time

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

worldbuiling LMAO. do NOT look too closely into my fics' timeline and chronology, i try my best but there's also a point where i stop trying. sometimes everything is vague bc it says smth with the story and/or bc it goes with the genre, but also bc it's vague in my own head

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

i did that!! i think sometimes it's a better choice depending what the story is saying, like slipping some foreign language than one character speak and not the other to say smth (show what a character is still too afraid to say / it's hot / etc). in The Way Home i tried to insert actual ASL in some dialogues, and it felt important both for the disabled rights and bc like, bilingual life sometimes you have the right word in one language and not the other (and again, it says smth)

sometimes it's not quite relevant to actually write it down in the language, just mentioning what it is is enough. different choices for different contexts and stories 🤷‍♂️

19. favorite fic you've written?

The Way Home 💖 i love amidst ashes and feathers so much i have to mention it as well. but ultimately i have a fondness for longer stories bc i have very few of them!! The Way Home is a first in that regard, longest finished work of mine. i spent 3 years with this story and it's gonna be forever with me just like the city i left behind when i posted the last chapter :) it means a lot on a personal level

20. tagging: @littlehaize 🫶

[nancylou444]

Hi! I hope you’re having a good day/night/morning!

So, I I need to share my thoughts with someone before I burst, and you’re always posting your thoughts, current and past, on destiel, so I’m hoping you can sympathize. Of course, you’re free not to read or post if you don’t feel like it (and I know you don’t need my permission for that either 🤦‍♀️ ).

So, I’m currently watching a reactor watch Supernatural who ships destiel. I’ve almost quit a few times due to annoyance, but they are otherwise entertaining and generally try (or tried) not to bring it up too often, and it’s now on season 15, so I’m locked in until the end. They just watched the episode "Last Call" where Dean is suddenly a good singer. Of course, they mentioned "bi lighting" and "subtext" because of course Dean can’t hang out with a male friend, especially one John caught him drinking with and got "mad" without it being because he was caught doing something "gay." 🙄 Not just because it was, you know, stupid to get drunk on a hunt. Plus being hungover for a hunt isn’t exactly ideal, even if Dean was old enough (he might have been). .

Anyway, this person actually used the words "I’m winning" in reference to the episode because Jensen (not Dean) sang, Sam was hanging back with Eileen, and Dean was chilling under the "bi lighting, " apparently. All I could think was, I’ve been literally watching this destiel shipper turn into a heller before my eyes over the months. And of course, they ship Sam and Eileen and were so happy that Dean went off to give them time alone 🙄 . It’s like heller brains only have one accepted scenario, and once they get in too deep, they become a clone of the rest.

Naturally, they want the show to end with Dean and Cass off on a beach (never mind that Dean mentioned wating Sam in that scenario) and mostly out of hunting, but not to get away from Sam, no. He’s there, too. Somewhere. Teaching the new hunters with Eileen or … something. It’s so ridiculous that they think this will/should happen. 1) When has the show ever hinted at a conventionally happy, or even happy at all, ending? 2) Dean would sooner gnaw off his own arm than semi-retire with Castiel on a beach while Sam continues in the hunting world without him. 3) Dean hasn’t wanted a romantic relationship since Lisa. 4) People who think Sam would want to continue hunting, on his own, if Dean stopped or semi-retired haven’t been paying attention to the show. I even saw one of their idiot followers saying Sam was alway better at adapting to hunting while Dean has always wanted out. 👀.

Anyway, I got ready to write a reply arguing against their idiotic ideas, but then I stopped and realized there was no point. There is literally no point trying to talk sense into people who spend so much time looking for hints and parallels pointing to the things they want (less codependent brothers and destiel) that they ignore the very literal and easy to follow canon, or actual text, of the show. It was a breakthrough fir me. There. Is. No. Point.

So, I deleted my planned response and just thought to myself, "You just enjoy your 'winning" honey, while you can." Because they are going to absolutely HATE the end of the show, and I’m just petty enough to be looking forward to seeing it. Does that make me a shitty person?

I realize it’s my own fault I’m annoyed right now, but I can’t just quit watching something once I’ve gotten this far, so I’ll have to suffer through (not looking forward to Despair 🙄) until the end.

Anyway, If you took the time to read this, thank you. I just needed to share this with someone.

This was an enjoyable ask, my darling. ❤️

LMAO, yes it is amazing the way that hellers 'see' the show.

Even now, almost three years after the finale, they still think destiel became canon because of the dubs and THEY had a 'wedding'.

Please let me know how they reacted to the 'confession' and the finale. 😆

[castielcommunism]

Hey :) I have a question; do you have any destiel fic recs? Blogs or user that complited lists? Years ago when I was more active in the fandom I saw a lot of "fic recs" categories on peoples blog and there were big fanfics everyone knew (91W, T&S, Not Part of the Plan, Redemption Road etc) but now I'm not in the game and I don't know any of the new "Big Fics" you know D: Thanks for any help

For starters, I have a fic rec list here that you can look through! There are a million fic rec lists out there but I have very specific tastes, so those are all ones I’ve personally read and enjoyed enough to recommend to other people.

As for the Big Fics, there are a lot of those but the ones I recommend are:

So Says The Sword (Season 4 AU where Dean is held captive in the Green Room for a ~2 years while Heaven gets the apocalypse properly set up, and Cas is his guard for the duration of it. This is a must read)

A Complete Kingdom (post-s8 horror fic. This does not have a happy ending and you should mind the tags, but it’s one of the best spn fics I’ve read period, so if you want to read like, “supernatural but it’s good and also actually scary”, that is a very good starting point)

where the weeds take root (post-canon fic set during s12, dean and cas buy a house together and then realise they’re in love. if you want domestic bliss fic it’s a good one)

Put Up Your Dukes (incredibly horny destiel fic. it’s lighthearted and fun and also, I cannot stress this enough, very horny)

Some of the newer, post-Nov 5th fics that I’ve enjoyed and aren't already linked in that fic rec list above are:

r/supernatural (dean posts about his relationship and family problems on Reddit. It’s really funny)

canticles (dean takes cas out on a “friend date” after failing to get him laid. set during Free To Be You And Me. It’s a fun early seasons pining fic)

the doorway to a thousand churches (Cas dealing with Naomi’s programming and brainwashing during s8. VERY GOOD, PLEASE READ)

my heart a compass (this is THE definitive post-15x18 “dean rescues cas from the empty” fic imo. it’s really good and even if you aren't interested in s15 fix-it fics (which I generally am not) I still really recommend reading this)

My Week (I WILL continue to plug this fic because I love it so much and it’s criminally underrated. Sam, Dean, Cas and Jack all keep a bullet journal and write about their weeks. It’s fun and heartwarming and sweet and formatted beautifully. you should read it)

Pillow Talk (nobody is allowed to even look at drowley or call themselves a crowleygirl unless they read this first. Even if you don’t care about drowley you should read this anyway)

a short history of dean and tentacles (I know what you’re thinking. This sounds insane. And it is. But you need to read this. nsfw obviously and read the tags, but I promise you it’s a genuinely good dean character study fic and not just like, weird porn)

Also, all the fics in my AO3 bookmarks are ones I would recommend to people!

The best place to look for fic rec lists in general is @jewishcharliebradbury!

[gentlemancowboy]

#remind me to tell you about the time I brought up spn in conversation with a coworker before I was REALLY into it #and then the inevitable insane fallout of that convo I'M ASKING

Oh boy, okay anon, this got long because I don’t know how to be succinct, but you asked for it so here we go.

(the following recounting is posted with permission)

Let me set the scene: March 2020, the world is thrust into wide-spread lockdown due to the novel coronavirus. Cue me starting Supernatural for the first time because “what else is there to do?” I knew nothing about the show. 

Zip. Zilch.

I ended up mentioning it during a Zoom work happy hour when we were talking about shows we were watching. The following is the first instance of Supernatural conversation with said coworker:

That was pretty much it for a couple months. But don't worry, it gets better (or worse, depending on your perspective).

Putting the rest below the cut because... it's long.

The next notable moment was coworker deciding to do a rewatch (they had previously watched up to s7).

Thus began us texting our reactions to the show. I’ll include some notable moments.

I was NOT initially a casgirl, though I do think the fact that OTHOAP was the turning point for me says a lot. Please note coworker’s casual response to this (this will be important later).

At some point, someone mentioned the term “Destiel” to me. I can’t remember when. But I was aware it was a thing. Now here’s where things pick up. These texts were all a few weeks apart.

I think it was at this point that Lie #1 was revealed that coworker had been way more into the show when they first watched it then they initially let one. Like fully on fandom Tumblr and LiveJournal and stuff. It’s fine. No harm. We came to the understanding that, “oh okay we’re both not normal about this, this is now a safe space.” Also funny side note: we at one point had a group chat with ANOTHER coworker but very quickly realized we were so far beyond where they were so we stopped talking to them about it.

We continued spiraling more and more. Coworker eventually ended up getting 4 seasons ahead of me in their rewatch. They broke the news about Destiel going canon to me, though at that point I was still on s11. Sharing some of those texts because our speculations were… well…

Sick and twisted.

Anyway, we finished the show, I signed back up for Tumblr in January 2021 after 7 years away, I start making gifs, reading fics. I see people talking about 4lw, don’t know what it is, ask coworker about it to which they said “never heard of it.” Lie #2. A couple months later they revealed that they read it way before I did. Fine. I get it. If you’ve read it, you know. Sort of a weird topic of conversation for coworkers. Moving on.

At this point, I’m now just fully in the fandom. Making gifs, writing fic, making amvs. The whole nine yards. I thought I had fully spiraled past where coworker was in terms of fandom involvement. Well…

October of 2021, they disclose that they had been writing Destiel fanfic since November 2020 (stream something suddenly everywhere).

And that’s pretty much it. We’re no longer coworkers but we remain very good friends that still don’t know how to shut up about this show.

I have a lot more hilarious anecdotes but this is already long enough.

[erosia-rhodes]

Top 9 Newbie thoughts on Supernatural after Six Months of Madness

I started watching Supernatural a week before the series finale, and full disclosure, it was only because I heard about the gay angel. I loved me some Good Omens, so I decided to check out a series my only previous thoughts about had been, "Is that show still on?" In the past six months, I've watched about fifty percent of the episodes scattered across all fifteen seasons. I've also spent time following the bonkers-in-the-best-way fandom on Tumblr, and here is what I have learned:

1) Everyone who loves Supernatural also hates Supernatural

No one is capable of praising this show without also trashing it. Supernatural is as awful as it is awesome. Watching Supernatural is like hate-fucking your nemesis against a wall; you're totally conflicted about it, but it's enormously pleasurable and you know you're going to do it over and over again. No one has a pure, untainted love for this show. They only have complicated emotions. This is because…

2) The fact that the show needs to be fixed is an essential part of its appeal

Strangely, if this show were better, it wouldn't be as popular. If you love a show that is perfect, you watch it once or twice or thrice, make a bunch of memes, and move on with your life two years later when you find something else to hyper-fixate on. If you love a show that's broken, you spend the rest of your life obsessed with fixing it. It's the crooked photo hanging on the wall that yearns to be straightened (because, you know, this show is bad at making things straight). It's the stray dog you know would be adoptable if you fattened it up and socialized it with your other dogs, and just like some people can't stop rescuing animals, Supernatural fans can't stop thinking about how to fix a show that isn't great, but could be with a flea bath and a trip to the groomers. Supernatural fans are not fans of the actual show, but of the show they imagine it could be, one that only exists in an alternate universe. They are in love with the Platonic ideal of Supernatural. That's also the reason why…

3) The fans understand the characters and themes better than 95% of the people who worked on the show

The people who watch Supernatural have thought about it way, way, way, more than anyone who produced it. I have read complex essays about what the color of people's clothing imply and how the state of the Impala reflects the state of Dean's mental health and other things I'm certain this show did not do intentionally. People can find depth in the shallowest aspects of this series. Any random fan could explain the complicated dynamics of the Winchester family and the overriding themes of the series better than most of the people who worked on it. That includes the LGBTQ stuff, which leads to the fact that…

4) The show is simultaneously too gay and not gay enough

On one end of the spectrum are fans who are offended you would dare to suggest one of the Winchesters might like kissing a boy and they'll shove you in a locker and duct tape your butt cheeks together for it. On the other end of the spectrum are fans who think it's odd that every episode doesn't end with two attractive men dry humping in a dark corner of the bunker library. No one is happy with the level of gayness on this show. It's always got too much "No Homo" or too much queer subtext, which is why I've concluded that…

5) The audience this show wanted is not the audience they got and they are resentful of it

The original pitch for this show targeted a male demographic who’s into toxic masculinity in a non-ironic way. It was about bros and beers and muscle cars and shotguns and hot chicks who will be killed to further the man's storyline. However, when making that show, they accidentally created a show that attracted female viewers who liked speculating about the queer subtext of each scene while looking at pretty men with traumatic backstories fight back their man tears. The show depends on the unintended audience segment to survive, but is bitter about it, which they remind you of time and time again by killing the female and non-white characters and toying with endless queer-baiting. It's like the writers got a plane to Rome, ended up in a gay nightclub in Amsterdam instead, and even though the canals and tulips make it a lovely city to visit, they wanted to go to Rome, damnit, and they'll never let you forget it! I also suspect that…

6) The people who made this show were at constant war with each other

This show has such a split personality. Sometimes it leans into the gay stuff and other times it makes fun of it outright. Sometimes they'll introduce an interesting side character that could make the show more diverse and then they'll slaughter that person for practically no reason. Sometimes they praise free will and other times they force people down pre-destined paths. The writers feel like a dysfunctional family stuck at Thanksgiving dinner endlessly squabbling with each other—who then had to write a TV show together over dessert. That's why it's such a weird hot mess. The show's unevenness makes me think that…

7) Some people's attachment to the show can only be explained by the fact that it imprinted on them when they were young

Some fans have mentioned they started watching Supernatural when they were kids. It's a pretty common experience to go back and watch things you loved when you were a kid and realize they were…not so good. Your memories of them are far better than the reality of them, but you cling to them anyway. The shows you watch when you're young imprint on you in a way you never forget. Supernatural fans are like a baby duck who looks up at a cat and assumes it’s their mother. Then that cat slices open their poor little hearts, leaving them wounded but not dead, forever be toyed with in agony. The only relief is that…

8) The fandom is batshit insane in the best way

I started following the Supernatural fandom on Tumblr in November of 2020 and OMG, it was AH-MAZE-ING. It was total insanity. I didn't understand half of what was going on, but it was more fun than a yard full of puppies doing zoomies. People were posting detailed PowerPoint presentations theorizing how the series would end, citing extensive physical evidence like the background in Misha's hotel room. People learned election results through Supernatural memes. Destiel went canon every other week. When the Spanish dub was released, Tumblr literally crashed! Obama's Twitter was following a Destiel account. There was a Twitter wedding for Destiel on Valentine's Day, which made the one-month anniversary on Pi Day.

It's been a ride, y'all. I have no idea how you guys survived fifteen years of this. The fandom has been so much fun that I actually sat down and watched more than 100 hours of this show so I could understand everything better. It's like the show is an extension of the fandom instead of vice versa. If anything sums up Supernatural for me, that's it. It's all about the fandom and the show is secondary to that. It's like the fans willed the show into existence as part of some partially botched spell. And part of that twisted spell is that…

9) The show will never die until someone finds its bones and burns them

This show has been off the air for more than six months now and it keeps trending on Tumblr consistently. Misha recently trended on Twitter simply because he was at the Oscars. That was it! He didn't even do anything there, he just attended, and some people figured it out by the reflection in a photo posted by someone else! And just as I was proofreading this post, Destiel started trending again because John Cena is a stan or something? This fandom is crazy and unpredictable and I love it like Dean loves pie! If there ever does come a time when this show stops trending, that will be the moment when they decide to reboot it or revisit it.

There is a lot more I could say about this show, but these were the elements that seemed most unique and bizarre about it. I wouldn't say Supernatural is a ride-or-die fandom for me, and I have no intention of watching another 100 hours of this series, but it's been hella' fun to drop in for a while. The show is just as much a dysfunctional mess as the Winchester family and I guess that's why people love it, right?

[anthonycrowleymoved]

I know this is old discourse but in light of destiel becoming canon, what are your thoughts on neil gaiman not allowing Crowley and Aziraphale to be gay lovers? He said that they're angels, not men, so is that supposed to imply that they're not gay simply cuz they're non-binary (so they're asexual)? I just wanna know if they'e in love or not lol. I ship them so much.

yeah okay this is gonna have to be tagged neil discourse because thinking about this over a year later i’m still mad huh

so like. i know very well what he said at the time. he was basically like, and i’m paraphrasing but that’s because i simply do not care enough to give a direct quote but on twitter he was like ‘oh well angels don’t UNDERSTAND human concepts like GENDER and SEXUAL ATTRACTION so NO they’re NOT GAY’ and then someone was like ‘but they’re in love right?’ and he was like ‘of course.’ right? everyone agrees that’s what happened right after the show aired? and like, okay, i’m not going to begrudge people seeing this as representative of themselves if they’re nb and/or ace, that’s cool and fine, and you do you. i find it interesting that i saw a ton more criticism about it on here than on twitter, but that’s probably just more indicative of who i’m following and how much i’m on here than anything else. anyway.

let’s break this bullshit down and explain piece by piece why i think neil’s quote unquote representation in gomens is a hot garbage fire and why it kind of rubbed me the wrong way from the moment i saw it.

1. he posted it on twitter. he wrote the script and could have like, you know, put it into the show, if them being In Love was like, actually part of the story. he had the ability to do that. gomens was already going to piss off right wing groups because of how it treats religion, this wasn’t something i legitimately think amazon/the beeb would have just said ‘no’ to if neil was serious about it. mean, maybe that’s a bit far into conspiracy territory, but i truly believe if they really wanted to make azcrow canon the one person who could have managed getting a scene would have been the author/showrunner. and because he didn’t if you’re a casual viewer who’s not fucking following his goddamned twitter seeing gay representation is now a rorschach test

‘they don’t adhere to human ways of thinking about gender and sexuality’ MANY THOUGHTS HERE but let’s start with

2. i think hallie originally said this and neil i know you wrote the book but like. did you read the book neil. because i thought one of the main points of it was that aziraphale and crowley had effectively ‘gone native’ and saw themselves more like humans than like celestial beings. and they’d been on earth for all of human history. it’s a bad take i’m sorry i know he literally wrote it but like really. really.

3. look i’m nb and i’d love some nb rep. but that was not nb rep. those were two cis male actors playing (largely) male presenting characters with absolutely no in-text indications that they aren’t cis. there’s one (a few? god it’s been a minute since i watched the show) character referred to by singular ‘they’ and it’s not aziraphale or crowley. and like, look, i get that in real life there’s nb people who don’t go by gender neutral pronouns and that’s cool and fine because that’s what those people feel inside. but, like, this isn’t real life, it’s a tv show, and referring to male presenting characters as he/him and then occasionally putting them in feminine clothing isn’t representation because people who aren’t looking for that kind of representation aren’t going to see it, they’re going to see a joke about a man in a dress

4. and i’m not ace so i can’t speak on that, but i do remember at the time ace people being like ‘that....was not ace rep’ so like, make of that what you will. again, i’m not going to tell you you can’t see them as nb and/or ace, but like, i’m just asking you, was that really representation? like, was it? in your heart like, would you have been happy with that representation if neil didn’t tell you it was representation? because if you’re just starved for content, that’s FINE, you’re ALLOWED, all i’m asking you is to not praise the creator for doing fuck all.

5. ‘of course [they’re in love]’ again where??? where??? where is it neil. where is it in the actual text of the show. like there’s in text evidence that they love each other platonically and there’s lots of jokes made by other characters but like. i hate to say that but that’s it. i don’t know why this off the cusp response still makes my blood boil but boy does it

6. i don’t want to go looking for it because i’ve done that like six times but there’s a post on neil’s tumblr from before the show dropped about how there would be moments that people who ship it would be happy with but it wouldn’t become canon. you can look it up i swear he said that in like....december of 2018ish? something like that. which, again, is fine on its own, but combined with the fact that after he was like ‘lmao that’s what i was going for’......not my favorite look

what i’m saying is like, if he wanted to create an actual queer narrative he could have but he just like, chose not to and then when he realized he could have people watching his show just because they’re thirsty for representation that isn’t there i think he went ‘oh i’ll jk rowling this’ i don’t KNOW that that’s what happened but, like, that’s what it looks like to me.

i used to regularly refer to the “representation” in gomens as nu-queerbaiting, which i still like as a term, because to me it’s the person in charge (not the actors, usually, unless they have some say in the writing process) going, oh no they’re totally in love with each other totally trust me :) and then like, they’re not, not really, not to the people who like, watch the show but don’t fucking follow the author on twitter. and that’s. i’m sorry, that’s not canon to me.

and, to be honest, how this is presented honestly makes me more angry than if it was just maybe in-universe wink wink nudge nudge, because i’m USED to queerbaiting and i know that like, almost nothing ever ever ever comes of it and i get it and i like having fun anyways, so i deal. and like, i was a book fan before the show came out. the book was written in the late 80s, and i knew that it wasn’t going to be anywhere near as gay as the fandom has made that work for thirty goddamned years, and i was fine with that. like, going into it, i joked, but it was fine because it was a relatively faithful adaption of a book i like. i wasn’t looking for gay representation, even though i ship aziraphale and crowley.

but like, there was this wave of people who came looking for representation, and the show is so vague on that concept that they saw it, but it’s like. it’s not actually really there. there’s no one saying ‘yes they’re really irl in love.’ there’s two male-presenting characters who COULD be in love, if you choose to view it like that, but maybe aren’t. and like, that’s FINE, on it’s own, but i hate that someone in a position of power said ‘no you’re right lmao’ even though he didn’t do shit. it was made in 2019. queer representation should be better than that. i’m not patting neil on the back for doing literally nothing.

so like, tldr: yeah the rep is bad in my opinion!!! it’s not good!!!! i don’t like how neil handled it and it’s gross!!!! i hope this answers your question!!!!

anyway that being said azcrow is such a good ship anyway, so like, why does it matter if they’re canon? ship em anyways no one can stop me from doing it even though how it was handled by the actual creator is a garbage fire when you look at it for more than like, thirty seconds. like......why must a ship be ‘canon’? is it not enough to read a book and see two celestial beings, in love with humanity?

[princesscas]

hey again mandy!! i was wondering if you could rec some fluffy destiel fics? just your favorite ones if you’ve got some, either fluffy or angsty! i’d love to add some diversity to my bookmark list ☺️💕

Ooohh yeah! You sent this right as an anon sent the same request :3

Anon: I have seen your answer to an anon and now I want you to do a list of your favorite destiel fics please!! I just need to read fluffy fics but I also want some that have very good plot and also good portray of the characters but with a happy ending i can’t stomach more sadness. Thanks!! By the way for these who haven’t read it I want to recommend a very good fic call I don’t care where you been.

So I’m not too big on angst, like yes I do love angst, it can be good for the plot/character development/etc, but sometimes too much angst is well, too much for me to handle lol. Fluff is my bread and butter when it comes to not only writing, but reading. It can do me no harm, besides making my cheeks hurt from smiling so dang much! 

So here is my list of fluffy, plotty, longfics! These are pretty old, because I haven’t been in the market for any destiel longfic in the recent years, besides oneshots and a few WIPs here and there. (i’m still neck deep into the stucky dumpster lol) 6 canon fics and 6 AU’s :D 

CANON

Professional Couple Only by saltyfeathers (Fake/Pretend Relationship) - There's a haunted apartment building in Vermont, and the ad says "Professional couple only". Dean and Cas rise to the occasion.

The Silence Between Heartbeats by yesmsmoran (elliedew) (2x20 AU) -  "Fic that replaces Carmen with Cas. And then, when Dean wakes up and he meets Cas for the first time he freaks out because it's the only man he's ever loved and he's so confused as to how he can be real when he obviously had to be something the djinn created."

i wanna see your animal side by microcomets (Animal Transformation) - Dean gets attached to a dark-haired, blue-eyed kitten. He hates cats, so he can't really say why.

Just To Make You See by youaresunlight (Mutual Pining) - “I’ve been reading,” Cas explains, lifting his coat to reach for something inside. It’s another magazine but not one about nature or economics. It’s a GQ with a suave male celebrity gracing the cover. “There’s an article in here that gives advice to those who are ��seeking to escape the friend zone.’”

And I Will Walk On Water by tracy_loo_who (Post-S4) - This fic is set after season 4 and totals ~122,600 words. It's a story about friendship and love, recovery and trust, free will, and Dean and Castiel's journey through it all. It's also about chocolate and hugs. If you read it, I really hope you enjoy it. ♥

Broadway Musical by Griftings (HILLARIOUS GO READ IT) - This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

AU

a world above water by museaway (Fairy Tale AU) - Castiel’s hope for freedom is threatened by a chance encounter with the Crowned Prince of Lawrence, who is trying to avoid an arranged marriage

To Find a Family by linasane (Kid Fic, Domestic) - When Dean's little brother gets taken away, he's expecting the fight that ensues. He's expecting the stress that comes from separation, expecting to do all he can to get Sammy back from whatever awful foster family he's been placed with. He's not expecting Castiel Novak. (Castiel, in turn, isn't expecting his first foster child - five years old and angry - to be the one that leads him to the family he's always wanted, but life has a funny way of working itself out).

Shorten the Distance by GhostGarrison (Online/Long Distance Relationship) - "Nerdytr3nchcoat" and "Impala67" weren't looking for romance on the dating website called 'dateangels.com'. Castiel was looking for friends and Dean was just looking to get his nagging brother off his back. What they didn't expect to find was each other. [a long distance, online relationship fic]

Cooking with Gas by WinJennster (Food Network/Chef!Cas) - Castiel Novak has it all. He's rich, famous, has a top rated cooking show and restaurant, drives an expensive car and wears Armani. His producer throws a contest to spend a day with Chef Novak, cooking and learning techniques. Castiel wants no part of it, but Balthazar insists and Castiel will do as expected. What Castiel wasn't expecting was to fall head over heels for the winner. Dean Winchester hasn't had a successful relationship in his 34 years on Earth. He's got a past he'd like to keep hidden, and his life rotates around his family and his business. Winning a contest to spend a day with his favorite TV chef is a shock, but a welcome diversion from his day to day life...until he meets the guy, and he turns out to be a big jerk. Dean figures he should have expected that. What he wasn't expecting was that same gorgeous blue-eyed man to sweep in and shake up his entire world.

Life In Pink by youaresunlight (Kid Fic - SO FLUFF) - At just 33 years old, Dean Winchester is one of the most sought-after wedding planners in the city. He’s chased his dream ever since he was a kid and is now on the brink of making partner at his firm. But the wedding that’ll make or break his promotion? Is his best friend Dr. Castiel Novak’s. It’s going to be the event of the season - unlimited budget, no expense spared - and it’s the kind of task that Dean has been waiting for… except he’s hopelessly in love with Cas.

Kiss the Baker by Ltleflrt (Bakery AU) - Jo is pregnant and craving something a little bit unusual. When she sends Dean on a mission to find her some chocolate cake donuts with bacon sprinkles, he's sure that he'll fail. Luckily his partner Benny comes to his rescue and introduces him to a quirky little bakery that sells all kinds of weird (and delicious!) baked goods. And they do special orders!Dean finds excuses to keep going back, and Castiel finds excuses to keep giving him special treats.

And I believe this is the fic Anon was referring to: don't care where you've been by thanks_tacos (A/B/O) Dean's life is finally changing. After years of enduring Alastair's abuse, the alpha dies and Dean's married off to the next alpha the system pairs him with - Castiel. The man is strange and distant, but not exactly bad, and Dean's determined to be on his best behavior and not mess up the chance he was given. Soon enough, though, he fucks up anyway and has to call the alpha for help.Castiel's lived his entire life without an omega by his side, and he was fine with that. He doesn't know how to proceed once he's suddenly married to a beautiful man who's obviously been through a lot. Omegas were always a confusing subject to him, so he tries not to interfere much - neither of them is there by their choice. But when Dean calls for help, he understands he's going to have to set some things straight and engage more.

[hawkland]

Destiel fic recs (round #4) + commentary

Time for another (mostly) Destiel fic rec round-up post before my bookmarks get out of control! This one’s a mix of longer and some shorter fics (or series thereof), no particular theme except I guess a lot of angst, hurting Cas, and all the other things that tickle my Id. Several Season 9 human!Cas divergence fics, plus some later season angst-fests and rewrites.

In the Shadow of your Wings by Enochian Things (Salr323) (52k) The first of two fics by this author which I absolutely fell in love with! Canon-divergence from the end of Season 11. Cas finds himself blasted to Naples, Italy by the banishing sigil in the bunker and he stumbles — almost literally — into a sexy, delightful Italian Man of Letters, Luca. When he makes his way back to the bunker and finds Dean still alive, he tries to confess his feelings but Dean panics and shuts him down. Cas goes back in Italy soon thereafter and ends up beginning a relationship with Luca, much to Dean’s chagrin. Meanwhile Sam is still missing and it turns out there may be some dangerous individuals who are out for Cas more so than even the Winchesters. 

I loved everything about this fic so much - Luca is an amazing OC, the Naples and London locations are wonderfully evoked and took me straight back to places I’d been. The angst, the pacing, the plotting and the eventual Dean/Cas getting together are all amazing and this is definitely on my re-read in the future list.

The rest of my recs below the cut!

My heart is beating from me by Enochian Things (Salr323) (55k) The other fic by this author that I literally inhaled in one day! Season 9 Human!Cas canon divergence. It’s been months since Sam and Dean have heard from Cas, and when they do, it’s in the form of a wedding invitation. Cas is getting married to Daphne - the woman who “rescued” him and named him Emmanuel when he’d lost all his memories post-Leviathans. It seems Cas went back to her while on his own and they’ve rekindled their relationship...whatever it is. Dean just knows something isn’t right about her, so he sets out to investigate and try to figure out WTF Cas is doing before it’s too late. 

This story is so, so good! The case Dean gets Cas to come along on is unique and provides a neat investigation subplot, but what’s so especially wonderful is the explanation the author gives of who Daphne really is — and why she’d been so cool about just having a strange man with no memories move in to be her “husband” (and then want to marry him for real a couple years later, after he’d vanished from her life!) In fact it’s so brilliant I’m basically accepting it as my Daphne headcanon from now on and I don’t want to spoil it. The fic is also great in exploring Cas still struggling with understanding human emotions, customs and etiquette, Sam is A Very Good Friend, and Dean is, well, Dean. (I’m just sad this author hasn’t written more SPN fics because what they have is just brilliant.)

The wilderness. by orange_crushed (8k) Wonderful, shorter Season 9 canon divergence fic by an author who consistently makes me happy. Human!Cas leaves the bunker with a few things to get off the ground from Dean and directions to connect with Garth...but he ditches that plan to try to find his way on his own. It’s wonderfully detailed about the basic struggles of survival, finding work, making ends meet and trying to make some new friends...and why it’s important for him to prove he can make it on his own before he’s willing to welcome Dean (back) into his life.

I Through My Window See by deHavilland (26k) This is an interesting one, written well before we had canon human!Cas in Season 9. Canon-divergence in which Cas remains human after they avert the apocalypse in Season 5. Sam and Dean set him up in an apartment in Sioux Falls and then...just kind of abandon him there. He spends most of a year just barely existing before a visit from Sam finally stirs him out of his inertia and depression, to eventually get a job and also start hunting on his own. This is an interesting read, if just to see an author exploring the idea of human!Cas abandoned by Dean a few years before it actually...ended up becoming canon! I love how Cas is written in this (it’s a story much like the next one on my list that I thought does an amazing, realistic job of capturing what depression feels like), but I do have some issues with Dean. It’s never fully resolved or explained why Dean was being such an ass so I honestly wasn’t totally sold on the ending - I wanted some more out of Dean, some more explanation or apology or something. It’s a story that would have been great to have a sequel from Dean’s POV but after all this time, that will just have to exist in my brain, I suppose! Still worth a read because it’s excellently written, Cas becomes totally bad ass again by the end and it’s always fun to read early SPN fic speculating on future developments.

I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures (20k) I found myself inhaling a bunch of wonderful short ficlets by this author the other day, but this is the one I had to stop at to rec. It’s another Season 9 divergence fic, of a sort - Cas is newly human, for the sake of the story there’s no Abbadon to worry about, Sam is healed...and Sam wants to move out and get on with his own life. Cas and Dean are both struggling with adapting to their new lives and it’s a hauntingly rich and stark portrayal of depression, inertia, and the slow healing process of accepting and adapting to change. I also liked that this story gives us a Dean who is a little more aware of his feelings for Cas and they both struggle to reach out to each other - for once it’s not sexuality causing a crisis of identity but all the other shit they are coping with.

Don't Sing Love Songs by ireallydidthistomyself (17k). I’m not normally a big fan of baby/toddler!Jack fics - I like the angst that he was forced to grow up too quickly, and in general I’m not big on kid!fic in fandom. This author’s work is a big exception to that. They’ve written several stories along a similar theme: Cas raising Jack on his own/in secret for years, Dean only finding them or coming back into their lives later on. But this is the version of that idea that really packed the most punch for me and was incredibly emotionally satisfying. Dean finds Cas after 6 years, where he’s kept Jack mostly isolated and safe from the world. But with Dean allowed back into his life, Cas may be inviting grave danger upon Jack as well. This one ripped my heart out but managed to make it all better by the end.

Better Ways to Kill Our Time by always_a_birthday_girl (8k) I don’t know why I torture myself reading Dean-in-the-Ma’lak-box AUs, but I do. I think because it’s pretty much my biggest nightmare/horror and for some reason it’s cathartic while terrifying? Anyway here’s one where Dean goes through with his plan, Cas crashes and burns for most of a year, until Dean finally starts doing what he promised he wouldn’t: praying to him. Cas figures out a way to communicate back and over the distance, they manage to have certain conversations they should have years before. It’s painful but lovely and there is a happy ending, so it’s well worth the read!

Time Flows Like Water and We're Drowning by triedunture (7.9k) A little break from the later-seasons stuff I (mostly?) read, featuring a seriously hot (but angsty) Cas/Endverse!Cas/Dean threesome. When Zacariah’s plan to show Dean the future doesn’t change his mind about taking on his “responsibility”, he sends Endverse!Cas back in time to try to convince Cas instead, showing him what he’s to become. I don’t think Zac expected it to turn into a threesome, but it’s hot and beautiful and sad and wonderful all at once. 

hachikireru by vaudelin  (23k) At one point I went on a wallow-fest of reading a bunch of sad 14x20-15x03 divorce-arc fics. Just to hurt myself more, I guess. I know this fic’s been recced around a lot (at least on fail_fandomanon) and I can see why! After leaving the bunker, Cas ends up in Sioux Falls to visit Claire. She’s busy tracking down leads to find Kaia’s killer and he decides to go along with her on one such hunt. But what they find is an unexpected supernatural threat targeting those with broken hearts. Well. I think you know where that might be leading. This is a wonderful casefic with lots of character moments between Cas & Claire and then Cas & Dean, working through their pain and angst and just...it’s a very satisfying read.

Moriah Codas: A Trilogy by Toomanyfandoms99 (11k total) A series of 3 shorter fics spinning off the events of 14x20, developing a slightly divergent universe the author’s written where Cas does have his wings back and has helped resurrect a few of the angels (Balthazar, Gabriel, and Samandriel in particular). This series is absolutely heartbreaking — Cas is completely broken by Jack’s loss, has “fallen out of love” with Dean after he was ready to kill Jack, and sees no way back to what he’d had and felt before. He’s determined to just let the Empty take him...but not until he and his assembled squad of “avenging angels” clean up the mess Chuck has created, smiting zombies and taking out super-powered monsters across North America. 

Cas’s motorcycle gang/angel squad is so fucking awesome (I want a happy fic where they do this!) and this is BAMF!Cas at his finest. I just have to include a quote:

He set down the empty glass, and Gabriel said, “well, dearly beloved, we have gathered here today to kick some zombie ass. Since they have chosen to amass in Carthage, we are here to take out as many as we can without causing this town to flip the fuck out. Are we in agreement?”

“I expect,” Balthazar grinned, “a full-on bar brawl. Do not disappoint me.”

“Cassie, Driel,” Gabriel addressed the duo, “how are we with weapons?”

“I have enough machetes in a storage facility uptown to film a Jackie Chan movie,” Castiel said.

But it’s also utterly and completely heartbreaking, so don’t read this one if you need a happy ending. If you do read, check out the author’s other later-season coda fics and fic series as they are all really great.

to mend what is not broken by gothyringwald (2.6k) This last short one I’ve mentioned before, but I just have to rec it again! It was my gift for the 2021 Hurt Comfort Gift Exchange and it’s everything I wanted, and more. Sweet and caring Dean, wounded but still prideful Cas, and some lovely wing!kink/wing!care that pushes all of my button just right.

Anyway, that’s it for now as I think this is long enough. If you enjoy my recs, could you let me know? I try to not just list titles but give some commentary...as it helps me re-find stories I enjoyed the most, too!

[fanfic-corner]

Ineffable Husbands

I’ve watched Good Omens all the way through twice, and although I haven’t read the book (yet!) I absolutely love Crowley and Aziraphale, and couldn’t help reading some fics with them in this week.

Inspecting the Spectacles by almaasi on AO3. (6,394 words).

Tags: 5+1 Things, Fluff, Romance, Developing Relationship, Historical, Bickering, Glasses, Sharing Clothes, Sharing a Bed.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: Six times Aziraphale tries on Crowley's sunglasses with permission, and one time he doesn't need to ask.

Notes: This is literally the cutest fic to have ever graced my eyes! Also, now I demand to see Aziraphale in Crowley’s glasses.

You’re the Only Prayer I Need by Kedreeva on AO3. (5,507 words).

Tags: Ineffable Husbands, Wingfic, Angel Wings, Angel/Demon Relationship, Wing Grooming, Bathing/Washing, Cuddling & Snuggling, Asexual Character, Asexuality, Asexual Relationship, Snake Crowley, Love Confessions, Trust, Non-Sexual Intimacy.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: Crowley had, in the six thousand years Aziraphale had known him, shed his skin exactly twice that Aziraphale knew of. Both times he had disappeared without a trace, having retreated somewhere very safe and very, very unknown to hide while he was so vulnerable, and Aziraphale had never thought to ask beyond that information. Everyone was, he had supposed at the time, entitled to their secrets. The problem was that he had stumbled directly into this secret now, and there was hardly a graceful way out of it.

Notes: The sheer level of trust is adorable, and I’m always here for snake Crowley.

i’d like for you and i to go romancing by dollsome on AO3. (6,748 words).

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: In which people keep mistaking Crowley and Aziraphale for a couple, and Aziraphale starts to wonder if there might be something to it.

Notes: This was so goddamn cute!!

The Angel Cake Challenge by almaasi on AO3. (8,132 words).

Tags: Canon Universe, Fluff, Romance, Team Free Will 2.0, Day At The Beach, Mistaken For A Couple, Bakery and Coffee Shop, Food as a Metaphor For Love, Public Displays of Affection, Pet Names, Endearments, First Kiss, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Closeted Dean, Coming Out, No Prior Knowledge of Good Omens Needed.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: There’s a kooky gay couple sitting in this little beachside bistro, at the table next to Dean. Dean’s biggest mistake was telling them they looked cute together. Now they’ve noticed Cas, and they’re silently encouraging Dean to be as openly affectionate as them. Dean didn’t sign up for this challenge. But now? Hell, he’s in it to win it.

Notes: I love my Ineffable Husbands, and I love Destiel, so this was perfect. Also, Jack deserves a day at the beach!!!

An Honest Surrender by Kedreeva on AO3. (4,107 words).

Tags: Ineffable Husbands, Post-Apocalypse, Love Confessions, Marriage Proposal, Marriage, First Kiss, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Soulmates, Soul Bond, Aziraphale’s True Form, Crowley’s True Form, Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship.

My Rating: 5 stars.

Description: "For six thousand years,” Crowley said, voice cracking, “I have wanted something I couldn’t have, because I asked the wrong questions. But I’m asking the right one now. The only one that matters.” In which Aziraphale follows Crowley home after the nonpocalypse.

Notes: Seriously, reading Good Omens fics always makes me so relaxed and sleepy it is unreal. I need to read them more often. Anyway, this is such a cute explanation for the final episode, and I loved it!

A Little Less Celestial by Kedreeva on AO3. (2,360 words).

Tags: Non-Sexual Intimacy, Non-Sexual, Sharing a Bed, Ineffable Husbands, Literal Sleeping Together, Wingfic, Cuddling & Snuggling, Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship.

My Rating: 4 stars.

Description: Aziraphale accidentally falls asleep, and Crowley teaches him sleeping isn’t so bad, really.

Notes: Oh my God, this was so calming to read in a way I really can’t describe? Also, now I want a bookshelf bed.

I hope you enjoy these! Good Omens fics are like Supernatural ones, except way, way more relaxing and usually with a ton less angst.

[justlikeeddie]

hey so look okay here i am standing shamefaced outside your door asking you if you wouldn't mind sharing or re-linking if you've shared before the names/numbers of the handful of spn episodes you've watched so i can get a slightly more informed flavour of the show when i inevitably capitulate to reading fanfic without giving up too much of my finite time on this earth to watching multiple seasons of supernatural.

GOOD NEWS - here are All Ten Episodes of SPN I Have Watched So Far, In The (Correct) Order I Watched Them. They are also rated for gay angel content, which tbh is mainly what I’m watching for, for the benefit of anyone else who may be in a similar situation.

15x20 Carry On - I maintain that watching the finale of this show first is the funniest thing you could possibly do, if you’re happy for it to be a completely incomprehensible experience. Witness Dean getting nailed to death. Cas content: 0.5/10, for one line in which his memory is briefly invoked at some kind of pie festival the Winchesters are attending

1x02 Wendigo - I only watched this because I was coming off a Due South jag and I thought it was funny that Callum Keith Rennie was in a very early episode. This is probably only worth watching if you too want to check in on how Callum Keith Rennie was doing c.2005, and/or if you are interested to see what the two leads looked like before they became the exhausted 40-year-olds in most of the gifsets, though I imagine there are probably better S1 episodes to do that with, not that I know what they are. Cas content: 0/10

4x01 Lazarus Rising - this is the Castiel introduction episode, although he only shows up in the final scene, and most of the rest of it is prime Men Stand In Rooms Talking To Each Other. When he shows up it’s good though. Cas content: 5/10, and all 5 of the points are for making the line “I am the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition” somehow even more intense than it looks written down

10x05 Fan Fiction - I maintain that trying to understand the first 200 episodes of the show by skipping to the one in which a girls’ high school puts on a musical summarising everything that has happened so far is the funniest thing you can possibly do. This episode is stupid, but I do recommend it, if you can stand to hear the word “Destiel” come out of the mouths of the actors. Cas content: 2/10, in that he isn’t in it, but he’s being played in the musical by a teenage lesbian, which seems Right

4x16 On The Head of a Pin - watched this in an attempt to watch “a good Cas episode”, although the (interesting) conceit of Cas experiencing doubt for the first time was overshadowed by the discovery that this show thinks that the way angels fight is that they just punch each other. Sure. Cas content: 6/10, not enough interaction with Dean, but strong points awarded for the beginnings of a crisis of faith and also being forced to his knees with a bloodied face

3x11 Mystery Spot - @the-omnishambles (who watched the first few series of the show in the 00s) kept telling me this was the one good episode she could remember. This was literally the first episode I thought was great from start to finish, and the knowledge that this show is capable of an episode that is good all the way through makes almost every other episode so much more of a shame in comparison. Anyway, this is a Groundhog Day conceit and it’s genuinely very funny. Cas content: 0/10

4x02 Are You There God? It’s Me, Dean Winchester - I thought that since Cas didn’t do much in the first episode of S4, maybe he started doing more in the second episode. He doesn’t, and this episode is boring, apart from literally the final scene (again), when Cas shows up to tell Dean he should show him some respect, which - according to most of the fanfiction I’ve consulted - sends Dean sexually insane. Cas content: 4/10, and all 4 of the points are for nobody realising they should have cut this scene if they didn’t want billions of words of Dean being dommed by an angel to exist on the internet

4x06 Yellow Fever - this is another silly episode, because by this point I was getting the hang of the fact that the silly episodes seem to be the most watchable. Dean gets a ghost disease (?) that makes him scared of everything. It’s pretty funny. Bonus points for a scene where he is hit on by a (male) deputy sheriff for literally no reason. Cas content: 0/10

5x03 Free To Be You And Me - this is the “Bert and Ernie are gay” episode, in which Cas shows up in Dean’s bathroom because Dean is The Only Person Who Will Help Him, and Dean agrees to help him but also insists on being present for his first sexual experience. Seems a bananas decision to make Cas very awkward about sex - rather than just uninterested in or intellectually curious about it - if you don’t want to make it clear that angels can fuck, do fuck, and might want to fuck Dean. Also seems a bananas decision to have Dean appear to fail in his extremely solemn promise to get Cas laid, if you don’t want to make it clear that he presumably just had to sort Cas out himself in the car afterwards. Cas content: 8/10, two points removed for not showing whatever happened in the car afterwards

5x04 The End - this episode was the second one that I thought was good from start to finish, so honestly it’s great to know that the show managed this at least twice in the 320 chances it had. Anyway, in order to convince Dean to do what heaven wants him to, another angel projects Dean into a vision of a nightmarish, post-apocalyptic future in which Dean has become a ruthless killer, Sam has been possessed by Lucifer, and Cas has got into yoga, orgies, and weed. I thought at least some of this was a joke every time I saw it referenced in a shitpost, but it isn’t. Cas content: 9/10, point removed purely because he’s not in the whole episode, but he’s high, sad, and dressed in a big baggy shirt when he is. Bonus points for the canonical creation of a self-contained AU for people to write depressing but very explicit fanfiction about. Extra bonus points for the insanity of airing this episode directly after the Bert and Ernie one.

[a-single-man-tear-dean]

My takeaway on #destiel, and the panels of the two people involved in the scene.

1. Cas’s love declaration very closely mirrors Dean’s apology in episode 9 in purgatory. Dean talks about how he doesn’t know why he always gets so angry and in the declaration Cas tells Dean that anger isn’t all he is.

2. Dean running up the stairs when he hoped that lucifer was actually Cas and then him basically saying that he’ll kill Sam or Sam will kill him but “Cas, you gotta bring him back” shows that he doesn’t hate Cas for the love declaration, he still wants him back even with the declaration and to me that shows a deeper love reciprocated.

3. Misha Collins does an interview with a bunch of the cast and makes clear that it “was a homosexual declaration of love” and does feel bad about the bury your gays trope. And also he made sure we knew that Jensen signed off on the scene and it wouldn’t have been written if he didn’t, shows that it is more than platonic otherwise why would Jensen need to sign off? Because it’s not like platonic “I love you’s” haven’t been declared by all of them before. And he did like a tweet that said “misha like this is destiel is canon”

4. Bobo Berens wrote the episode and he is also the writer of episode 9 with the purgatory scene. Coincidence? I think not. He has always been behind destiel and everything that goes along with that.

5. Jensen was decidedly quiet after the episode, however he did like Mishas tweet about how he wishes he was more like Cas. But in his panel this Sunday whewwwww boy there is a lot to unpack from it. First - the moderators wouldn’t let destiel questions through and destiel and deancass were all blocked out from the questions on the side, but even still Jensen made nods. He brought up misha, he mentioned the colours green and blue (which we know are the ship colours) and he *intentionally* didn’t mention cas being dead when he said what has happened vs what is left to do (might not have been intentional but for this deep dive I am going to say it is). And let’s not talk about the giggle he did when he saw Elvis being his last downloaded song, yes it’s clearly because of soldier boy as that is the song he downloaded, but anyone who reads Destiel fan fic knows that Elvis is a big deal there because of Twist and Shout, one of the most read AU destiel fics out there. and second - someone transcribed his answer from a 1 on 1 where they asked about destiel and his answers were nothing short of confirmation 100%. Him and misha had talks about how they were going to answer fan questions regarding the scene and agreed to all (which means Jensen knew misha was going to call it a homosexual declaration of love). He also made mention that he didn’t want to “cop out” in his answer; and why would he need to cop out if it was purely platonic? But that he doesn’t believe Dean had time to process what was being said to him, for multiple reasons including his best friend was about to die, and he didn’t think that celestial beings could feel human feelings. He also said that he believes Dean thinks that Cas’s feelings are basically too monumental for Dean to process. So he made clear that no decision was made on Dean’s side about reciprocation it was more Dean couldn’t reciprocate because of the situation not that he didn’t want to. He also called out knowing how important that scene was for many reasons - and we all know that those reasons are because of the slow burn of destiel AND the goodbye to a long standing fan favourite character. While he did want to make known that the scene can be interpreted anyway we chose, he knows how he played it and how misha played it and how bobo wrote it.

6. Last year at a gold panel in Jacksonville someone asked Jared his thoughts on Samstiel and Jared fully gagged and responded “Sam has better taste”, Jensen not required an answer at all pipes up “and clearly Dean has no taste at all” this joke wasn’t necessary but does it foreshadow something bigger down the line? At this point Jensen didn’t even know about the love declaration though misha did, so why make this joke unless you as an actor played your character in love also.

7. In conclusion I do believe that Destiel is canon, I don’t believe it is unreciprocated by Dean, I think we don’t know deans thoughts one way or another. I do think we have a good understanding of the actors views on it one way or another though; and I believe they have both admitted it is canon at this point. I hope for great things in the series finale, but at this point in the game I would be happy with cas just coming back, or any mention from Dean what was actually said and how he is processing. But this is supernatural and I am also prepared for dissapointment

[thiscastielhasflown]

[excuse my mediocre banner, i honestly tried my best]

well, i'm happy to say that i've officially made it to one year on here -- part of me feels like the time has gone so fast, yet so slow at the same time. i joined the fandom about a month into quarantine back in april of 2020 when i started watching supernatural again after taking a 4-year hiatus. i just wanted a place where i could interact with people who felt/thought the same things as me, and i am literally so glad i did. everyone welcomed me with open arms and instantly made me feel as though i was part of the spn family. it is a little sad to me that i joined in so late in the game (especially with the final season in progress), but i've learned and experienced SO MUCH with everyone (of course, destiel going canon is the topper to everything).

thank you to everyone (new and old in the wild process of mine) who have joined me on this journey, sent me asks when i forcibly asked for them, became my friends, and made me feel truly loved for the first time in years.

anyway -- i love you all, cheers!! hoping for more years to come 💞

[laora-inn]

Supernatural - Destiel in 14x13, or Why SPN end must be happy

Hi, guys. 

I’ve re-watched 14x13 and need to add something about relationship between John and Dean. Considering Destiel as an endgame, of course; don’t like - don’t read. 

Literally, 14x13 is about forgiveness. Sam and Dean both forgave John and finally let him go while Mary is staying with them. 

But when we look to the structure, we can see some directly unspoken things. 

Here I wrote:

Sam didn’t admire John the way Dean did. Of course, he loved him, but in 14x13 Sam would be the one who’d be against John’s appearance in the bunker. On the other hand, Dean’d be blissful… until he’d discover John’s presence’d make Cas a stranger to him. Yep.

Well, Cas was never so important to Sam than he is to Dean. That’s canon.

John’s presence not only makes Cas a stranger to Dean. It ruins all Dean’s family, while Cas as Dean’s romantic partner is a crucial part of it. So in his case this ruining can be fatal to Dean. 

But what Dean’s family is? 

In the middle of 14x13 John says to Sam and Dean: “Now you live in a secret bunker with an angel and Lucifer’s kid”. In the end John says to Dean:

JOHN: No, son. My fight. It was supposed to end with me, with Yellow Eyes. But now you – you are a grown man, and I am incredibly proud of you. I guess that I had hoped, eventually, you would… get yourself a normal life, a peaceful life, a family.

DEAN: I have a family. 

Many Destiel shippers pointed this moment. I think we can suggest that ALL WHO LIVE IN A SECRET BUNKER are family Dean told about. His family.

Here I wrote about metaphorical similarity between “Dean’s” family and “John’s” family. A quote:

You know, this thing was bothering me all the time. Does Jack really have 3 step-fathers, Sam, Dean and Cas? Clearly it’s Sam whom Jack trusts the most, Sam was the first man whom Jack saw after he was born. Clearly it’s Dean whose appreciation Jack wants the most, whom he is fishing with, like Dean was with his dad. Also it’s Dean who promises to talk with him about sex. And clearly it’s Cas whose love for Jack is absolutely unconditional, like... oh, wait. Like his mother’s love was.

So technically Jack has 3 step-fathers, but in fact their roles are divided like this: "father”, “mother” and “brother”, who is like third parent to Jack and is closer to him than dead “mother” and angry after “her” death, desperate drinking “father” are.

This situation is very similar to John, Mary, Dean and Sam family dynamics.

In 14x13, with John staying in the bunker, Dean is going to lose all of them - Cas, Sam and Jack. And even Mary, who doesn’t live in the bunker anymore. 

Sam will become a lawyer without children - I think Jess is dead anyway - he and Dean won’t have anything in common. Cas’ll become a stranger. Jack isn’t going to be born at all! Mary, whose resurrection was a gift specifically to Dean from Amara, will be dead.

That’s more, Dean won’t be himself anymore, without them. Maybe, he will be killed by the angels, by Cas. 

ALL HIS LIFE Dean was trying to restore something that was broken. That’s why he says to Sam right after John’s appearance and his reunion with Mary:

DEAN: You said that the – the pearl gives you what your heart desires, right? So, my heart desired – I – I’ve wanted this, man. I’ve – I’ve wanted this since I was 4 years old.

What Dean truly wanted was the family that had been destroyed by Mary’s death. ‘Cause with Mary John is a different man. Sam, who, unlike Dean, never knew this side of their father, clearly sees it. Gosh, John even makes apologies to Sam!

That’s why in the end of the episode it’s Sam who hesitates whether it’s fair to send John back:

SAM: Did you see them at dinner, the way they looked at each other? They just seemed happy, you know? It doesn’t feel fair to get all this and have to throw it away, and I know we have to. But it just feels like, you know… Once we send Dad back… it’s none of this ever happened. He – he just goes back to – to… to being Dad.

As for Dean - he knew it long ago. He’d seen his father different... and still, in the end it’s Dean who wants to send John back. Not Sam. 

I suppose that’s because Dean’s wish changed. He understood, that all this time he was creating new connections without literally repeating the patterns that had existed in John’s family.

Dean was creating a new family, his own. And he’s succeeded. 

John from the past can’t be here, ‘cause there is no place to him anymore. To Mary - yes, she understands Dean and his relationship with Cas from their first meeting, it’s shown to us. But John can’t understand. To him Cas and Jack are “an angel and Lucifer’s kid“. That’s why he is toxic to Dean. And that’s why his appearance ruins Dean’s life. Cas, who is a stranger to Dean, who tries to kill him, is the clearest evidence that John can’t be here. 

So after encounter with Cas whom he lost in “John’s” reality for sure, Dean replies to Sam: 

DEAN: And for the longest time, I blamed Dad. I mean, hell, I blamed Mom, too, you know? I was angry. But say we could send Dad back knowing everything. Why stop there? Why not send him even further back and let some other poor sons of bitches save the world? But here’s the problem. Who does that make us? Would we be better off? Well, maybe. But I gotta be honest – I don’t know who that Dean Winchester is. And I’m good with who I am. I’m good with who you are. ‘Cause our lives – they’re ours. And maybe I’m just too damn old to want to change that.

First of all, it’s breaking news to Sam that Dean blamed John. Sam didn’t know that, though we knew. We saw a demon!Dean from his subconsciousness in season 3, who blamed John. Gosh, we heard demon!Dean’s words about John just in 14x10, in Dean’s subconsciousness AGAIN, and I think it was done on purpose. 

So Dean is ready to say aloud that he blamed John. And to say that he loves him, as he said to Mary in 12x22. 

But also it’s John’s appearance that made Dean realize HE HAS a family already, there is no need to restore something. And in this point John’s presence isn’t wanted anymore. John is Dean’s past, and his influence on Dean’s world is still strong enough to ruin it.  

Like Elsa sang, let it go. 

In season 14 we had an episode which had strong parallels with 14x13. That was episode 14x04, with a ghost, who tried to kill his metaphorical “son’s” best friend. 

When the ghost vanished, a new relationship could start. That’s why in 14x13 we see two girls in love who’re holding hands just like John and Mary were and Cas who is back in the end of the episode, who’s Dean’s Cas again. 

And right after this episode 14x14 comes, where queer-coded character Noah the Gorgon expels Michael out of the “closet” in Dean’s head. 

The one who kills Michael is Jack. He is the hope for Sam, Dean and Cas for the peaceful lives with their significant others (I mean DeanCas and Saileen, yep), he is the one who can defeat all the monsters.  

He is really the future. 

And the future is just impossible if you’re living with the past. 

_____________

After such massive structural preparations the end of the show MUST be happy, for Destiel especially. 

Otherwise it won’t be the end. 

[1strongindependentcatwoman1]

Since it’s basically 2014 tumblr again, in the year of our lord 2020, I have a few thoughts about Supernatural that I need to just get out of my head.

Before I start my rant, I want to say that I haven’t kept up with supernatural for some time but I watch it from time to time. And I did watch the Destiel scene that has now sent us back to the dark times. So, what this post is not going to to is harass the actors, especially Jensen, for doing their jobs. And I am going to call out how the writers are actually the homophobic ones because Hollywood can’t write gay characters for shit without killing them off.

We have to remember that the actors are actual people with feelings and are perfectly valid in not wanting to answer certain questions at con’s. Especially from people that have threatened to harm their families. They are not there for you to harass and demand answers from. They are just doing their jobs. They don’t owe you anything.

Without further stalling let’s begin:

My thoughts on Destiel:

1. The fandom: the supernatural fandom has been a complicated one since 2010. I feel like many of the fandom has projected themselves onto the characters without regards to what the characters might be feeling and thinking based on how they are written.

2. Hollywood writers: the writers of supernatural have been there for at least 10-15 years. Characters change as they are being written. That being said, most Hollywood writers are straight white men and don’t know how to write a good LGBTQ+ story line in a show that was primarily aimed at a male audience and was adopted by a young female audience. Writers tend to use gays for one trope, the “bury the gays” trope in which one character confesses their love for a same sex character and then dies. Or the only character to die in a show is gay. This has become a clique. The fandom is tied down with Destiel becoming cannon that that accept this as an outcome and don’t demand better writing from the show. They just accept it because the got a small taste. Destiel is not full Canon, it’s only half Canon. Absolutely not, writers. Do better.

3. Cas: though I haven’t kept up with the show, I know that characters go through a lot of inner conflict and change throughout the series. Cas in this episode used his love for Dean to save him. His goal has always been to save Dean, even at the expense of himself. He knows that Dean might not feel the same about him, but he tells him he loves him anyways because it will save him and that makes Cas happy. Knowing Dean is going to be alright was enough.

4. Cas as a reflection on unrequited love: something many young viewers of supernatural in the LGBTQ+ community might not take away from this scene is that in life, confessing your feelings for a person might not work out with a relationship. Especially if someone of the same sex is straight. This is a real thing that happens to people in the LGBTQ+ community and I personally felt it when watching his scene because I understand what both Cas and Dean were feeling at this moment in time.

5. Cas’s love language: cas’s love language is reassurance. He uses words of encouragement and care to Dean to show his affections. “Your more than what our enemies see.” “Your more than ‘daddy’s blunt instrument” “everything you do is out of love” “you are loved”. He gives Dean something he’s never gotten before, reassurance that he’s a good person and what he’s doing is for good.

6. Dean’s reaction to Cas: I think Dean’s reaction to Cas is justified because he has absolutely no time to process the information that he is given. Dean has never thought he could be loved by anyone in the way that Cas loved him. And the fact that Cas immediately dies after confessing his love just leaves Dean more confused and in an emotional mess. Imagine your best friend gives you a death bed confession of love to you and then fucks off and dies. The questions that are going through this man’s head. He was just told he’s more than a weapon, more than a solider. That he deserves to love and be loved back. If Dean doesn’t go through a mental breakdown in the next two episodes, I would honestly be shocked. He’s losing everyone and he doesn’t know how to cope. Someone help this man.

7. The fandom’s complete disregard for Dean’s feelings: once again the fandom accepts the scraps of gay writing that we are given and have no love for characters going through trauma because they are ✨projecting✨. Dean is not homophobic, he’s confused and traumatized. If I see another bitch say that again, their gonna see these hands.

8. Dean’s love language: dean’s love language is acts. He saves people out of love. He raised sam out of love. He cares for his family out of love. He has already shown Cas that he loves him without having to say it out loud. And I think Cas understands that and that’s why he didn’t wait for Dean to respond. Love doesn’t have to be spoken aloud. It might not be romantic love that Dean has for Cas but it’s love none the less.

AND THIS TOXIC FANDOM DOESNT GET IT BECAUSE THEY’RE ALL YOUNG AND DONT KNOW WHAT REAL LOVE IS YET. ESPECIALLY YOUNG LGBTQ+ VIEWERS THAT ARE BLAMING THE CAST FOR THE TERRIBLE GAY WRITING! DO FUCKING BETTER. DEAN/JENSEN IS NOT HOMOPHOBIC. BUT THE FUCKING WRITERS MIGHT BE.