#anyone else feeling so normal rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yetdevout · 1 year

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hi everyone.

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selfindulgentfandomstuff · 2 months

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Polite reminder to any new ppl on my blog to read my pinned (at least, ideally my carrd too) before following!!

#I have exactly three f/os that I lose my mind (/neg) when I see other ships with them :(#everyone else is fine I’m mostly normal abt them 👍#I just want to remind ppl bc I have a couple new ppl in my notifications who seem cool but I wanna make sure everyone is clear on how I feel #about sharing Murdoc. sorry for being like this abt him he means so much to me and is an incredibly important part of my coping mechanisms #that being said I’m HAPPY to talk about Jack Delroy and Abner Krill with anyone else!!/gen #I’m obviously thinking abt Jack rn lately with all the posts but you know. whatever.

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nbmudkip · 10 months

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im CRAAAAZZZYYYY im FUCKING INSANE!!!!!! i’m a cycle path….. HHHHHHHFDRRRRRRRHHHHHGHHHH

#me.txt #IM SO FUCKED RN #IM IN THAT HORRIBLE STAGE OF A NEW HYPERFIXATION FORMING WHERE ITS ALL I CAN THINK AND ALL I CAN TALK ABOUT AND ALL I CAN SEE #which happens to be the VERY ANNOYING STAGE in which i am VERY ANNOYING towards EVERYONE AROUND ME because i wont SHUT UP!!!!!!#talking about anything that isnt isat for more than 30 seconds without bringing it up somehow is like PULLING TEETH to me right now #and my friends are already starting to get sick of and weirded out by it #and i dont want to keep randomly bringing it yp and being annoying but I CANT NOT DO THAT!!!#IT FEELS LIKE MY SYOMACH IS FULL OF BEES WHEN I TRY!!!! MORESO THAN USUAL!!!!!!!!#and its not like i can go on a reblog spree or talk to anyone else about it #BECAUSE IM NOT EVEN HALFWAY THROUGH THE GAME!!!!#AND IM ALREADY THIS SICK IN THE HEAD!!!!! BUT I CANNOT LET MYSELF GET SPOILED!!!!!!!!#CANT keep talking about it to friends CANT go online for an outlet IM GOING TO DIE #I HAVE NO WAY TO SCRATCH THE ITCH IN MY BRAIN AT ALL AND IT KEEPS BUILDING!!!!!!!!!!#AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHRRRRAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #okay. im fine now. im normal. i can survive without bringing it up. i can do it. im brave #<- guy who is not normal and will not survive and is kinning siffrin so hard they feel sick

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lolacouldnotcareless · 1 month

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Questionable DecisionsTM at work were taken and i don't even know yet their amplitude <3 will be fixed on it monday <3

#superior was supposed to send me my schedule so i could organise myself #he didn't <3 #i'm the last arrived so i get the places no one wants to go to which i understand #what i don't understand is being told that 'normally we wouldn't send anyone only in extern groups'#'we would rather give a intern group and an extern group'#'but we can't do that this year so you'll get two groups in extern! and you'll be left to your own devices for one!'#'also we know very well that you don't have a car i hope it won't be too much trouble' or else what i lose my job?#be so so ernst rn #i love my job. i love my colleagues. i'm fortunate enough to have that and it feels like i'll have to hold very tight on those two facts #my adult learners -most of whom don't really have the choice to be there- are much less frustrating to work with #than whatever is going on with my superiors

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bittwitchy · 5 months

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see the reality is i post on my rps usually when nobodys been there a bit and nobody is probably online, but the mental illness in me keeps saying its bc everyone secretly hates me and i dont deserve love, and when i tell a gov doctor that, they basically just say ‘take your antidepressant’s and shut up’ which is also funny when said gov doctor wont refill my fucking antidepressants in the first place

#what i need is smthn for my anxiety and PROBABLY the obviously worsening ocd #but anxiety meds and antidepressants dont mix well #just like adhd meds and anything else dont mix well #which is why i just have a redbull if i need to focus bx it works for a few hours and then i pass out #which isnt healthy but its better than going through the diagnosis process AGAIN bc they dont have my info anymore #its early sad times rn w brina who hasnt gotten an ounce of treatment at all hi #see the other thing is #if i talk about my mental health at all #people will either hate me for being annoying which is what my brain will pinpoint #or feel sorry for me which i also dont want #all i rly wanna do is vent but thats never really an option at all #like yes i know its not normal to want to have a breakdown and cry bc your fucking pillow isnt the correct fluff and wont dluff #i know its not normal to feel like you should die because something wasnt in fhe spot you put it in and was moved slightly #im aware. and the reality is nobody who can do anything about it cares #i have to get an authorization to see a therapist or get meds at all even tho the card claims i dont have to #and the doc tbey gave me wont give me one #they dont allow email so i cant leave a paper trail when bitching at them and my calls go ignored #im losing my mind steadily #and thats not even onto the physical problems #but also the sheer fucking audacity of the website being all ‘oh just go to ERs and UC snd we’ll cover it’ vs hospitals specifically saying #‘we will refuse you if you have Gov Ins unless you have the money to pay out of pocket #if youre on gov insurance you dont have fucking money thats the entire fucking point. you creedy fucknuts go shove tour nepotism in your #fucking eyes and die if anyone doesnt deserve to fuck its you fuckfaces #sometimes i just want to scream esp when this doesnt seem to be most other ppls issues #but then i talk to other women and it is #it just doesnt make sense and i hate it #but i never rly got help on private insurance either so #tbd #depression cw

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danothan · 1 year

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i keep wondering why my schedule has been so wonky lately as if i didn’t quite literally get into a car crash less than a week ago

#danbles #car accident mention #hello from 5 in the morning #we’re fine everyone’s fine the other person’s insurance is allegedly going to pay for it #but i think it was my first real look at death so i’m still trying to process it #weird guilt feelings for smth that wasn’t even my fault #grief is a weird thing to process i’ve found out!#i’m not used to being angry yet it keeps coming back #it’s very hard for me to care abt things rn #but ik it’s just one of those things i have to ride out. i’ve certainly been thru worse #and the fact that i can confide in my interests is a good sign that i still care at all. and i will care again #i’m rly lucky that i’ve had my sibling to talk to abt this but that’s also bc they were there #and got it worse than me! nothing hospitalizing thank god but we’re still healing #anyway i don’t need sympathy. talking abt this with anyone other than my sib has been rly irritating (is currently in an irritable state)#but i think i just wanted to let ppl know that i’m going thru smth. idk how that helps but it does #i think i just cant reconcile with the idea that i couldve lost someone i care deeply abt and everyone else is just moving on #ah fuck that’s what it is. im angry abt how insignificant a lifechanging event actually is #i don’t want anyone to care but i do think i need someone to know that it’s not normal rn #like i just need to throw it out there into the void that smth Has happened #and then i can go back to a new normal #alright it’s 5:30am now i think i should go to bed fr #also this got rly heavy but i dont wanna freak my friends out. like i’m okay and i’ll be okay #each day has gotten easier so far #and it doesn’t mean i’ve been pretending to be happy #it’s a rly weird duality idk how to explain #like apprently i was laughing a lot during the actual crash! emotions are weird man idk!#christ it’s almost 6 now OKAY GN FR peace and love everyone #normal is right around the corner 👍

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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...

#yesterday i was wandering around the campus where ive resided these last 4 years bc ive banned myself from running until my leg heals #and i was thinking like. what am i gonna miss about this place when i leave? bc im always thinking abt the things i cant wait to get away #from. and its a real short list. ill miss the palm trees bc i never get sick of seeing thrm. theyre so weird #ill miss the yucca. again bc theyre so weird looking. ill miss the way u can see where all the ants r bc in the non human populated areas #there isnt grass everywhere bc desert. ill miss that there r so many birds of prey hanging around. and the road runners and all the lil #lizards. and maybe in an abstract way ill miss being so close to the boarder bc when u live near a boarder boarders feel like bullshit #like staring down the road into another country. idk theres something i like abt that. ill probably also miss being able to run outside #all year long bc in the winter during the day all u need is a light jacket lol. where im going it gets real cold 🥶#maybe ill even miss the constant blue skies. but idk ive always liked a cloudy sky better. makes me think of home haha #ill def miss how convenient my apartment rn is. the loft bed. the low cost. the 5min walk to campus. sigh. but thats pretty much it. i #dont think ill miss anything else. im not really close with anyone. my boss was the reason i came here and she left this school in January #so thats it i guess. i think i stayed a year too long and was not well for a lot of my time here but so it goes #just gotta move to the next place. just gotta pray pray pray that i find an apartment soon. i dont even wanna say anything abt it bc im #afraid to jinx things. even tho thats irrational. like. i just gotta somehow project how good a tenant i am. im so quiet u will never see #me and i never complain abt anything bc i have brain problems. sigh. i cant wait for this transition to b over #im so so so ready to be in a new place doing new things. but at least my energy is back. im back to high energy on little sleep lol #i dont understand how my body functions lmao. somehow when i get a normal amount of sleep it's a sign that i feel awful #unrelated

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nygleskas · 1 year

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ermmm thinking abt pining era with jean visiting the parks department to talk w tom and asking if i'm around..............him making excuses to visit tom when rly he just goes there for the chance of seeing me ..

#bc i visit the department often if leslie or anyone else needs help w smth. like how ann's there often despite not working there yk #alsothinking abt him staying w me during late nights at the e720 office again. *bangs my head against a brick wall*#i feel so normal rn #.txt #lore tag

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zedif-y · 2 years

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anyone else just... a little bit gay for all of their best friends . a little in love with every person they hold dear ...

#ryan's screaming #ryan spends time with friends and goes a little insane with emotion . nbd #EITHER THIS IS NORMAL OR I NEED TO DO SOME REFLECTION #im Extremely demiromantic btw i feel like this is relevant info. all of my best friends are so important to me while also being the--#--only group of people atm i could even fathom loving in a romantic way .#but like its not. like that . i think. mostly #hejckdbdkdfbdj MY FRIENDS ARE AMAZING. OKAY #SORRY TO BE SAPPY ON THE MCYT SIDEBLOG BUT I REALLY REALLY LOVE MY FRIENDS #ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE THAT!! ANYONE ELSE JUST FEEL SO HOPELESSLY ENDEARED AND FOND OF YOUR FRIENDS #LIKE HALF THE SHIT I WANT TO DO WITH THEM WOULD BE CONSIDERED NOT PLATONIC BY A VAST MAJORITY OF PEOPLE #AND I DUNNO. I DUNNO #I JUST KNOW THAT I LOVE THEM . IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.#GOOF LIRD #JRJDFKNFJF DONT... LOOK AT ME RN IM EMOTIONAL

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vulpinesaint · 2 years

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one thing about me is that i really like making up new little rhymes for the little couplet in california girls by katy perry. if you ever see me start a tag or post with “california girls we’re unforgettable” PLEASE read the next line with the same cadence and melody as “fine fresh fierce we got it on lock” because i Will have written it with the appropriate meter and it will fit into the line Perfectly

#another thing about me is that i will use the words couplet and meter in casual conversation. apparently.#can’t think of any normal words rn though so 😭#god. i wanna go to souplantation. anyone else feel this way #valentine notes

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piplupod · 2 years

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,

#rly wish the holidays were not so difficult for me dhfjfl #i hate having a horrible time while everyone else is at the very least finding pockets of joy #and not in a ''poor me :('' way fjdlsl its more in a ''i dont want to bring anyone down'' way fjfkdl #i want to leave ppl to enjoy their time but god i am rly going thru it rn fjfjld #i just rly resent how unwell i am rn fjfjldl i hate being close to crisis while other ppl are just trying to enjoy themselves #why cant i just be normal fhfjdl #i feel very alone idk fjfkdl i am not bc i have a couple good friends but fjfkfl #i just hate being this unwell while everyone around me is celebrating and spending time w loved ones i guess fhfkdl #maybe i am jealous. idk. idk if that makes me scummy tho fjfklf #i just want to have like. one hour where im not actively seriously thinking abt killing myself fhfjdkl #i wont do anything until like mid January if i do anything tho dw fjfkdl im not going to do anything rash #suicide tw

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paeonie-s · 2 years

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SONNY BOY !!!!

#rewatching it w mel rn. one of my fave shows of all time i love it #three eps in already thinking abt how much is gonna change and be revealed. makes me so insanely emotional #tho a quality of it i rly appreciate abt the show that i can finally put into words is that the. the chs dont act like normal chs #typically i feel some connection to chs BC i can understand or relate to them on some level even if theyre personality and bg is completely #seperate to mine #and i wouldnt say most of sonny boys chs are v complex but it still does a phenomenal job specifically making me feel isolated from all but #select few (nagara mizuho rahjdani and later asakase and mb nozomi). which idk its like uniquely comforting #bc sonny boy is all about growing up and developing a sense of self in an ever changing world and connecting with others and for me i feel #like my experience w all that was already so alienating. so flattening the chs w the strongest social lives just feels like natural to me #bc i fr do not get or understand social ppl. love my friends but it feels impossible for me to ever understand anyone else or have them #understand me. there is just a degree of disconnect there that can never be solved and i feel like sonny boy is a piece of media #which acknowledges that disconnect and still allows its chs to form friendships beyond it. which is what i need in media #this is crazy if anyone understands this um. hi. are we abt to kiss rn #sonny boy #🌸.txt

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