#any character who isn't immediately miserable is lovely

[hollownest-whore]

Nobody cares but hc that bardoon's kind are a type of lesser Wyrm "worms" that specifically feed off the decomposing bodies/kingdoms of dead Wyrms as they grow

[winters-rose-daughterofcain]

It's actually so important to me how flawed Penelope is you don't get it. She's complex and she's kind and sweet and caring and loving and bitter and manipulative and insecure and she's young and hurt and fucking up and making mistakes and hurting people and loving people and handling things in the worst way possible with the resources she has on hand and she's allowed to.

So often for a fat (and I say that within the context of the show, Pen is a fat/plus sized character within the narrative even if Nicola isn't) character to have any storyline outside of mother or joke they have to be the perfect victim. To be fat is to be victimised by society to some degree, it is to be told you are unloved and unwanted and unworthy without anyone saying those exact words, we all know this even if we don't want to except it. It's why almost every fat character is bullied in some way even if it's passed off as a joke, and they are just expected to take it because to actually acknowledge the pain and hurt and damage that causes is to acknowledge their humanity.

There is no space for complexity when you do not recognise the humanity of a character, there is no room for mistakes or grace or forgiveness in a narrative when the character is presented as lucky to simply be there. This goes doubly so for romance, as rare as it is to even see plus sized girls as a romantic lead, when they are there is no room for mistakes, the standards they are held to are so vastly different because they can't fuck it all up, they have no room to make mistakes when people question why they're even there in the first place.

But not Penelope. She fucks up so many times over, she creates half her own problems trying to fix things or make herself feel better. It dose not shy away from the damage and underlining issues and insecurities the life she has lead has left her with, and it's sympathetic to be sure, but what she dose with it isn't. Because fat people do not have to be the perfect victim and honestly most of the time are not. Because when you tell someone how little they are worth and how out of place and undesirable they are at every turn and expect them to internalise that, especially a young girl with very little power at her immediate despoil, it doesn't always come out in a very nice palatable way. It doesn't always create nice sweet uncomplicated people who cry a little when insulted but otherwise brush it off. It creates people like Penelope, it creates anger and resentment and bitterness and a need for control.

Whistledown is so many things, not all of them negative, but it is the cause of so many problems in her life after she made it as an attempt at a solution. It has caused her to hurt people and betray people and lose some of the very few genuine connections she actually has. She manipulates people and misleads them to keep her secret, because keeping a secret like that will always result in that. Her motives are sympathetic, she rarely dose anything to bad without reasoning, she has all the excuses in the world and still at the end of the day she fucked up. Her and Eloise are the second love story of the season for a reason. She adores that girl so much and she is absolutely miserable without her, as Eloise is without her. They love each other so much and there is so much pain between them now, they're practically crying every time they look at each other. And even tho the situation was complicated an messy and not completely her fault, she did in a way cause it. She's hurt people and she's hurt herself. And I love that.

Because she's a main character. We know her and Eloise will make up even if it isn't the way it was before (arguably a good thing but that's a different post.) Because she's a romantic lead, because we know, even if we don't know how they get there yet, that she will get her happy ending with the man she absolutely adores and who loves her just as much. It will not be easy I don't want it to be easy, Colin has every right to be angry and hurt and betrayed and he deserves to have the space to say whatever it is he's feeling and to have a negative reaction, but he will forgive her. Part of that is just because of who he is and the relationship he has to her (mandatory Colin appreciation moment) but it's also because the narrative has given her room and grace to be flawed.

There is so much to love about Penelope. She's so intelligent, and she's funny, she's a good listener, she makes people feel heard and important, she's kind, she's attentive, she's romantic, she's creative, she's beautiful. She is a victim and people and society do hurt her, but that's not all she is. She's given the space to be more and still be forgiven and loved just like anyone else. Because her actions is what she's apologising for not her existence. She dose not need to earn her place in a love story just because she's fat, it's her actually flaws and mistakes that exist in abundance no matter how sympathetic some of them might be, that she has to make up for. And I adore that and her.

You take away so much of her character and her agency and her complexity when you say she did nothing wrong or that she's the absolute devil. Let her be flawed, let her be someone trying their best and failing at it, let her make mistakes. But give her some grace, for once the narrative is. Her happy ending will come Bridgerton is a romance show, but she'll have to work for it. Colin and her will work for and earn their happy ending together, because they love each other and because of who they are and what they mean to each other they will find a way to make it work, but also because the writers let them and her find it.

[reiderwriter]

The Us That Could Have Been

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female BAU Reader

Requested: yes - role reversal of the player!Spencer fic I posted here!

W/C: 5.7k

Summary: They say if you want to get over one man, you have to get under another. Spencer isn't so sure why he dislikes the idea of you doing that quite so much.

Warnings: Mentions of Maeve, spoilers for S8, mentions of minor character deaths, smut, unprotected sex, creampie, angst.

A/N: I'm not going to apologise for this one... Have fun.

Find the rest of my masterlist here.

If you were a genius, you’d know that it took you three hours, twenty-three minutes, and six seconds to fall in love with Spencer Reid. If you were a genius, you’d also know that it took him five years, seven months, twenty-seven days, and two hours to the second for him to break your heart. The thing you were learning about geniuses though, is that they were the most oblivious people on the planet. 

Her name was Maeve, he had told all of you. And he needed your help to save her because he was in love with her. And of course, you went along with it, you tried your best even while your heart was cracked in two because at this point, you couldn’t stand the desperation on his face. The day he told you about her, only days before he died, you cried in the arms of Penelope Garcia for hours, letting her console you as you felt your world get flipped upside down. 

“I don’t know why I’m feeling like this, god, Penelope. Five years, and I knew, I knew that if he liked me like that something would have happened already, but I just…” She rubbed your back as you laid your head on her shoulder, letting your tears fall freely as the sobs wracked through your body. 

“I’ve been in love with him for five years and he never even noticed, and… Penelope he hasn’t seen this girl before and he’s desperate for her. What about me is so unlovable?” Your voice cracked as you broke down again, burying your head in your friend's arms as you let all the emotions hit you at once. 

“Y/N you listen to me right now. You are not unlovable, you have never been unlovable. If Spencer cannot see what is right in front of him, then he is an idiot. You are the most amazing thing that has happened to him, you’re a great friend, you’re smart, you’re beautiful-” 

“I’m not her. Penelope, I… I want to be her-” She held you as you emptied yourself for hours, crying until you were so physically exhausted that you just couldn’t anymore. You couldn’t say that you stopped crying per se, just that your body ran out of emotions to sustain you. 

“Okay, Y/N, here’s what you’re going to do now,” Penelope said. She’d heard you out for long enough, but she wasn’t going to let you be miserable for long. 

“You’re going to pick yourself up, take care of yourself. Get a haircut, dye your hair, whatever you need to do to get some change. And then you’re going to do your goddamn best to forget him, because if he’s too stupid to realize how special and amazing you are then he really doesn’t deserve you.” You sniffled a bit and nodded at her words. 

“And then, you’re going to get back out there. Y/N, when was the last time you went on a date?” 

“I don’t know it’s been… The last one I can remember was before I entered the BAU. I’ve just been so busy-” 

“Bullshit. You’re going to put yourself back out there and find a man, or multiple men, who actually value you and want you. A wise scholar once said the best way to get over a man is to get under another.” 

–X–

A year later and you’d probably taken Penelope’s words to heart a little bit too much. Maeve had died at the hands of her stalker not even a day later, and you felt terrible for Spencer, but he’d pushed you away, he’d pushed everyone away, so you’d decided she was right. 

Your first date had been a few weeks later, and you’d have liked the fact that you’d taken him back to your place and then immediately kicked him out and never seen him again after that to stay a secret. But the BAU copycat didn’t let any of your business stay within the team for long. He had pictures of you with the first guy, the guy from a week later, and the guy after him as well. By the time you’d figured out who the copycat murderer who’d sent you all Zugzwang-themed threats was, he’d got pictures of you locking lips with five separate one-night stands.

The team had said nothing about it, of course, except Hotch’s private aside asking if any of the men in the pictures needed informing about the situation. You’d had to admit to them that you’d not seen any of them since, and, with no reaction from Spencer, you’d felt almost vindicated in taking this step. 

If he didn’t care then, in those tense months where you were all leaning on each other for support, reeling from the death of Erin Strauss and the attacks on the team, closer than you’d really ever been before, then he wouldn’t ever care. 

The thought was freeing. So you’d kept up with your constant stream of men, not letting them get close enough to hurt you in the way that Spencer had, using them and discarding them like broken toys, ignoring that maybe it was you that was the broken one. 

It took a year for him to notice it. A year of you coming in with suspicious bruises on your neck that you laughed off, a year of your newfound confidence, a year of your conscious distance for him to notice that he missed you. It was slow at first. In those first few months, he just accepted that of course, you’d been seeing people. He’d assumed from the photographs everyone had seen that you’d been dating the entire time he’d known you, the feeling unsettling him a little, but he thought that was only because he’d never noticed. 

Now it was all he could notice. The way you’d walk in sometimes smelling unfamiliar, having showered at a hookup's place before taking off, the way you were suddenly open to the flirting by the local PDs on your cases. The way a sadness seeped into his chest every time he saw you with someone else. Envy wasn’t a feeling he was familiar with, so it took him stupidly long to name the emotion. 

You were back at O’Keefe’s after a local case successfully closed, and if you were drinking a lot, no one mentioned it. No one except Spencer, who’d made it his objective to keep you safe and by his side the entire night, for reasons he couldn’t even name. It was stifling, having him constantly hovering over you. 

“Spencer, lighten up a bit, have a drink.” You smiled up at him, trying to get him to loosen up so you could escape the way his sudden care was making you feel. The bartender was eyeing you up from his place behind the bar, and while you were usually careful not to get involved with men whom you’d likely run across again, you were throwing caution to the wind that day. 

“I’ll have a drink if you drink some water and slow down a bit, Y/N.” He handed you the glass he’d retrieved earlier and you sipped it slowly, squirming under the care in his gaze. He ordered a drink, and you eyed up the bartender as he did so, pushing Spencer’s hand off your hip as he approached, offering him a smile. He looked between you and the unfamiliar man, and felt a cold flash in his veins, waiting for his drink and then pulling you away back to the table with the rest of your friends, tangling your hand with his. 

You pulled out of his grip but followed him dutifully. He guided you into your seat quickly, brushing your hair out of your eyes before falling back into conversation with the rest of the team. You hated the way he could still make your heart stutter, still have you feeling hot all over from a single touch, and you felt trapped in the booth, screaming for a way out. 

Your chance came an hour later, when he excused himself to the bathroom, and you excused yourself as well, running back up to the bar. When he came back, you were gone.

“Where is Y/N?” He asked with a scowl, cursing himself for letting his eyes off you for even a second when you’d drank so much that night, having come back to suggest you turn in for the night, getting ready to offer you a ride home. 

“Y/N? By now, she’s either in the back room with the bartender or she’s convinced him to get off early and head back to hers,” Morgan chuckled, taking a swig of his drink. “Took her only two minutes of conversation to have him inviting her out the back entrance, she’s been gone for like five minutes now. 

The constricted feeling settled in his chest again, as his scowl deepened. Not knowing why he was feeling so goddamn destroyed by that statement, he let his head hang and left the bar himself, taking himself outside to get in his car and go home. Unbeknownst to him, you watched him leave from the alley behind the bar, the bartender placing open-mouthed kisses on your exposed neck as you buried your worryingly consistent feelings in the scent of bourbon and lust. 

The next week is rough for both of you. You laugh and play along with Morgan’s jokes about your game, keeping an eye out for him the entire time and ending all the conversations as you feel him enter the room or step closer. It doesn’t stop him from hearing it all, though, all the details about your sex life tormenting him, as he boils with anger at how wreckless you’re being with your constant stream of guys. 

“Mama, you were on fire last week. Took you only two minutes to disappear with that guy, you’re going to have to let me in on your secrets,” Morgan laughed from his perch on your desk. 

“Sorry, a magician never reveals her secrets, and what I do is definitely magic.” Your tone was suggestive and set the man off in a booming laugh, but with your back to the door, you hadn’t heard Spencer’s entrance. 

“The secret is that men are more accepting of casual hook-ups with strangers than women,” he snapped at you both, beginning to ramble as you both looked up at him in shock. 

“Okay, kid, I was just joking-”

“When surveyed over 75% of men said they would be willing to have sex with a complete stranger, vs. 0% of women, and while that’s just one study, there are multiple others that I could quote that have similar results.” 

“Spencer,” you chastised him, but he didn’t stop.

“What? Did you want to know when posing the question of an affair to people in a relationship that 18% of men reacted positively to having casual sex with a stranger, and surprisingly 4% of women also reacted in the affirmative? Did you ask that guy if he had a girlfriend before you fell into his bed, Y/N?” 

“Okay, that’s enough, Spencer, take a walk. I don’t know what’s up with you today, but that was out of line. Hotch is looking for you in his office.” The words came from Morgan, but he kept his eyes locked with yours as he was scolded, memorizing the look of pain in your eyes as he finally backed away. 

He didn’t know why he did it. He knew it would hurt you, and yet he continued anyway, even after you’d begged him to stop. He was hurt, and he didn’t know why, and he didn’t think he had any reason to be hurt, and somehow it was all because you’d been in the back of his mind constantly for as long as he could remember. 

–X– 

“Okay, girl’s night, my place, tomorrow night. There are no cases, and I managed to get Hotch to agree to let us put our phones on silent for the night, so it’s just me, you, JJ, and Blake, a bottle of wine and some good old-fashioned girl talk, what do you say?” Penelope asked you gleefully in the break room one day as you both prepared your drinks for a busy day of paperwork ahead. 

“I’m sorry, Pen, I have plans already.” You grinned up at her as she pouted, promising to make it up to her another time. You didn’t offer an explanation though, just excusing yourself back to your desk and letting her know that you’d make it up to her another time. 

Reid took your place as soon as you vacated it. Almost obsessively, he’d been following you around like a lost puppy since he’d exploded on you the other day. 

“I know you said girls’ night but… Could... Could I come? I think I need some uh, girl talk?” He asked Penelope, an awkward, embarrassed look on his face as he smiled tensely. If anyone knew what was wrong with him, recently, it would be them. 

Last year, he’d have said it was you, but the distance he’d felt recently, combined with the fact that he was almost 90% sure you were the root of his problems had him desperate for other opinions. 

“Oh. Are you sure, Spencer, we’ll be talking about all kinds of gross women stuff?” 

“I was raised by a single mother. I’m sure nothing you say could gross me out. Please?” She nodded her approval telling him what time to get there and to bring his beverage of choice, knowing he didn’t really drink wine all that much if he could help it. 

He turned up twenty minutes late, after spending a great deal of time pacing outside of Penelope’s apartment building wondering if he had any right to unburden himself on them like this. Pacing he wondered whether you’d actually showed up despite your mysterious plans and whether this had been all for naught anyway. 

When he eventually knocked on the door, Penelope opened it and greeted him with a warm hug. “We were wondering when you were going to knock on the door, one more minute and we were going to come out to get you.” 

JJ stood up to hug him, wine glass in her hand, and Blake offered him a wave from her perch on the couch. He took off his scarf and coat and accepted the glass of water Penelope offered him, settling into a chair opposite the three women. 

“Penelope said you wanted advice about something?” Blake was the first to enquire, the three of them getting straight into it, not letting him chicken out of it. 

“Yeah, I think so. Lately, I’ve been having these, I don’t know, weird feelings…” 

“Oh god, I thought I was a few years out from having the talk with someone,” JJ joked, but Penelope shushed her quickly after a quick snicker, letting him continue. 

“I’ve been… I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but I’ve been acting really weird around Y/N, and I can’t figure out why.” He finally pushed the words out, feeling a weight off his chest at the confession. 

“You can’t?” The room was silent for a minute as they looked at each other, and he looked at them looking at each other, wondering what it was exactly that he’d missed. 

“Yeah? I don’t know, every time I see her I just want to, I don’t know, have her attention on me, even if I have to say something a little mean to get it. And in the bar that time, I was so, I don’t know hurt, I guess, when she disappeared without saying goodbye.” 

They just listened to him go on, not stopping to interrupt him, so he continued. 

“And there’s been this weird distance between us lately, and I guess it’s been there for a while, but I miss her, but she’s still there. I can still talk to her, and I can still spend time with her but I miss her all the time.”

“Spencer,” Blake said with a soft voice. “Since when have you been feeling like this?” 

“I don’t know, I guess it started after everything happened with Strauss and the copycat in New York. But she’s always been… I don’t know, closer than most people? But every time I think we’re getting back to normal recently, she pulls away again and there’s this… void where she should be.”

JJ put her drink down and leaned a little closer to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. 

“Spencer, I think you might be in love with her.” He considered the words for a moment, before getting ready to dismiss them. 

“No, love is a good emotion, this doesn’t feel good, it feels… ugly.” Blake stared at him sympathetically, calmly talking him around. 

“Spencer, think about it. You’re protective over her, you don’t like seeing her with other people, this all started right around the time the copycat sent those pictures of her with other people. It is love, and it’s jealousy, too.” 

The words hit him like a tonne of bricks as he suddenly felt the full force of his words. He was in love with you. 

“Oh god, what do I do?” He held his head in his hands, and Penelope scoffed a little from her seat, the rest of them turning to look at him.  

“I’m sorry, you’re going to have to figure this one out on your own genius.” She said with a slightly sharp tone, and even the girls sent her questioning stares as she continued. 

“You don’t just get to decide that you want her after all this time, not after how you’ve been treating her these last few months.” She turns her head away a little bit and sips her drink, her tough-love approach leaving him slightly defeated.  

“Penelope, do you know something?” Blake asks firmly, trying to coax some answers out of her. 

“If I did, I’d be under a strict oath not to tell anyone. And I wouldn’t want to considering how much pain she was in when she made me swear never to tell anyone.” It was clear from the tone of her voice that she really wanted to say something though, the words desperate to spill out. 

“Penelope, your loyalty is commendable, but don’t you think what you have to say could help both of them?” JJ quietly coaxed out of her, and she finally gave in. 

“Okay, but if you hurt her, Spencer Reid, I will never forgive you ever again.” He nodded quickly, hanging onto her every word. 

“Think about what else happened a year ago.” She encouraged him, and for a moment, he was coming up blank.  

“A year ago? We were in the middle of the copycat case. Strauss had just been killed. We were close to being pulled off the case-” 

“You got a girlfriend, Spencer. You came in one day out of the blue and just announced that you were in love with someone you hadn’t met, and you didn’t realize that you were torturing her.” Penelope tried really hard not to snap at him, but his ignorance of your feelings was frustrating, to say the least.  

“What Penelope is trying to say, Spencer, is that we think Y/N was in love with you, too,” JJ added, softening the blow. “And finding out you didn’t feel the same way so suddenly was, well it was a shock to all of us really.”

“What Penelope is trying to say is that she spent six hours with me crying into this couch, and then picked herself up and helped you try to save the woman you had chosen over her. So yeah, she’s been a bit distant, but can you really blame her?” 

“She… She was in love with me?” His heart stopped for a second, dropping to the pit of his stomach as he thought back to those days, how you’d acted around him, the smiles that hadn’t reached your eyes, the reassurances that he’d brushed off, so desperate to help Maeve. 

“Honestly, until you told us about Maeve, I thought you two had something going on,” Blake added. 

“We used to have an office bet when Emily was around about which of the two of you would confess first,” JJ admitted shyly. 

“Oh, god.” He let his head hang a little in shame. “Do you… do you think she still feels the same?” 

They shared another glance at each other again, and he panicked trying desperately to decode whatever it was that had just passed between them. 

“Look, we shouldn’t profile each other but… It’s not a coincidence that all of her hookups tend to happen after you pay her some attention.” Blake observed, letting Reid fill in the blanks of her statement.

“That might be my fault actually, I told her the best way to get over you is to get under someone else.” 

“I don’t want her under someone else,” he stated then, cutting himself off before he could say anything else too damning.  

“She’s not here tonight, why isn’t she here?” He panicked looking frantically around the room for answers, but none of them knew really.  

“She said she had plans, but she didn’t tell me what they are.” 

“Do you think she’s… do you think she’s with…” He couldn’t finish the thought, instead bolting upright and gathering his things. 

“I need to go.” He let out, as the women cheered behind him, finally happy that he was taking action. Penelope shouted your address at him as he left as if he didn’t already have it memorized, running out in the rain, his feet carrying him to your apartment.  

He saw the light on when he approached, thankful that you were still there, and bounded up the stairs to your floor, not giving himself time to second guess this before he pounded on your door.  

You pulled the door open, a confused look on your face as you greeted him, his chest heaving, water dripping down his face. He looked like a mess. 

“Are you alone?” He gasped out, having to pause between each word to catch his breath.  

“Spencer, what are you doing-” The breath left your body as he leaned into you, catching you around the hips and walking you back into your apartment, your back hitting the wall behind you as he rested his forehead against your own, chest still desperately drawing in oxygen. 

“Please, please tell me right now if there’s someone here with you. If there is, I’ll leave, if there isn’t…” His gaze fell to your lips and your entire body lit up, the haze of your confusion finally lifting as you took in each of his words. His lips moved forward, seconds from connecting with your own when his question was finally answered.  

“Y/N? Who is it?” The voice was male, and it was coming from your living room, but it was all Spencer needed to know as he detangled himself from you, pushing his wet hair out of his face and putting some distance between you two, muttering apologies as he backed out of the door again. 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t… I’m sorry,” he said, quickly turning away from you and leaving your apartment quickly. 

“Spencer, wait-” You tried to yell after him, but it was too late. He had disappeared into the night, as quickly as he came. 

You returned to the living room, cursing yourself for not answering quickly enough as you crawled back into the seat you’d just left. 

“What was all that?” Your brother asked from his perch, shoveling popcorn into his mouth in a way that had you somehow even more pissed at him for the simple fact of his existence.  

“That was Spencer. He… God, I think he thinks I’m in here with a guy.” 

–X– 

The next few days at work were tense, as you desperately tried everything to catch his eye. But you weren’t sure why you were putting in so much effort. He was the one who had burst into your apartment and practically begged you for your attention, why were you now the one chasing him?

Needless to say, you took your frustrations straight to Penelope Monday morning. 

“And then he left without letting me explain that it was my brother, and he hasn’t talked to me once this morning, he keeps running away from me and I don’t even know what the fuck it was he was trying to gain from all that and- ughh he is so dense.”

Penelope had sensed the oncoming disaster the moment she’d seen your social media post about your brother’s visit Saturday morning, and you only confirmed all her fears as you unloaded onto her. She silently cursed Spencer as well, and once she’d given you some reassurance and reminded you that you had some case files on your desk that were urgent and distracting enough to calm you down, she practically lept from her seat to hunt Reid down.  

“Spencer Reid, you get your ass in my office right this second,” she whisper screamed at him in the breakroom, his sunken eyes showing that his jump to conclusions had left him in a poor emotional state. He jolted at her words, as she watched to see if you noticed the two of them before practically frog-marching him off down the hall.  

“What the hell happened? We sent you off to confess your feelings, and you what? Pin her to the wall and breathe down her neck before running off with your tail between your legs?” 

He looked down guiltily before replying. “She had a guy there, Penelope, I didn’t want to… I didn’t want to get rejected like that.” 

“She did not have a guy there, Spencer, she had her brother there.” She pulled up your post on her phone and thrust it in his face as she watched his eyes go wide at his own stupidity, clutching the phone as he read your words.  

“And if you weren’t a coward, you’d have stayed and told her even if she did actually have someone over.” 

He’d since tuned out her words though, the crushing weight of his almost-confession that had been stuck to him since the weekend dissipating slowly. 

“This is her brother?” He looked up at you again, desperate to confirm the words she’d already said. 

“Yes. You’d know that if you weren’t such a technophobic freak. I love you but this is the 21st Century and you’re an idiot.” 

“Yeah, I am.” He handed her the phone back and slunk out of the office, and back to his desk. He had a chance to try again, and he wasn’t going to fuck it up this time. 

–X– 

You didn’t know how you knew that night, but when you heard the knock at your door, you knew it was him. 

You hesitated before reaching for the door handle, pulling it open, and confirming your suspicions. 

“Hi.” You said, and he returned the greeting with a mumble of his own before the two of you fell into silence again. He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something else, but couldn’t, instead letting his gaze fall to your lips. You heard the hidden question in his look and opened the door a little wider. 

It took only a moment for him to come crashing into you, hands holding your face as his lips met yours in a passionate embrace, drinking you in as again walked you back into your apartment, not even breaking away as he closed the door behind you.  

You wrapped your arms up and around his neck, as you let his hands fall to your hips, your chest, your ass, exploring every part of your body he could reach as you stood caught up in each other. In your desperation for each other, you hit walls, and bumped into tables, finally stopping at your kitchen island as he lifted you up, wrapping your legs around his waist as he started pressing kisses down the hollow of your neck. 

“I’m sorry,” he muttered between kisses. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was your brother and I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner, and I’m sorry I’ve been so weird recently.” You pulled his face back up to your own claiming his lips in yours once again, swallowing each of his other apologies. 

He pulled away again, looking at you tenderly as he lifted you into his arms and gently carried you into your room, laying you down on your bed. 

“I love you,” he whispered, and the words broke you. You’d spent five years practically begging him to say them, and another year since trying to bury even the very idea of him feeling the same way deep inside you. Tears fell from your eyes and he kissed each one of them away, muttering confessions into your skin. 

“I love you, please don’t cry.” 

“I love you, you’re so beautiful.” 

“I love you and I’m so so sorry.” You pushed him away again slightly, regaining enough of your composure to finally talk again. 

“I need to know that you’re serious, Spencer. I can’t… I can’t do this if you’re not totally sure, because it will destroy me.” Your voice broke as the words stumbled over the knot in your throat, your hands balled into his shirt, legs still wrapped around him. 

“I’m serious. I don’t want to hurt you ever again.” He pressed his lips back into yours again, and you let the kiss deepen, lips slanting over each other in desperation as the need to be joined overtook your body. 

He lifted your skirt, trailing a hand between the two of you as he checked your arousal. You could feel his cock pressing into your thigh, desperate to be freed from it’s restraints. He began kissing his way down your naval, but you pulled him back up.  

“No, I need you now. There will be time for that later, but if you don’t do this now I think I’ll drive myself mad with wanting.” His lips reconnected with yours again as you began divesting yourselves of clothing, and within another two minutes, he was pressing into you, muttering more adoring serenades into your skin as he began catching the tears escaping your eyes again. 

“Yes, Spencer, more please,” you moaned underneath him, legs tight around him as he began thrusting into you with a ferocity you hadn’t felt from him before. It was tender, but you were both desperate, after months of separation, to come back into one another. 

Your lips and teeth clashed together as you let the room echo with your moans, his moans, and the sound of your skin slapping against each other. His forehead came to rest against your own as he grew closer to his release, lips disconnecting as you just stared into each other's eyes in that moment, seeing each other truly for the very first time. 

“Y/N, I’m gonna… I’m gonna cum.” He pressed down into you harder, looking down to the place where you were joined and letting out a whispered curse as he watched you take every inch of him. His hips stuttered then, and you felt your own climax reach you as you felt him release into you, his lips softly tracing your own as you breathed each other in again. 

He pulled out and immediately went to work making sure you were comfortable, propping you up on the bed, making sure the pillows behind you were plump and soft, and running off to find something to clean yourself up with. You watched him silently, again brushing some of the tears from your eyes. 

“How do you feel?” He said shyly as he returned, having pulled his pants back on at least as he bought you a glass of water. You offered him a small smile and a thank you as you replied. 

“I think… I think we need to talk, Spencer.” You said, not meeting his eyes as he looked down at you attentively. 

“Why did you come tonight, Spencer?” You asked, voice so quiet you resisted the urge to repeat the question, knowing that he heard you perfectly clearly, 

“I needed to tell you how I feel. It’s been staring me in the face for six years, and I somehow didn’t know, but once I did I just… I needed you to know.” You nodded at his words, standing still in front of you on the bed as you swung your legs off and asked him to pass you your nightdress back. You pulled it on over your head as you asked him your next question. 

“Why did you run away the other day?” 

“I didn’t know it was your brother, Y/N, I should’ve-”

“It shouldn’t have mattered who it was. If you love me, you should fight for me, right? The way you fought for Maeve.” Your tears start falling again as you open the wound that brought you this far. 

“Y/N, that was… That was different-” You can hear the panic in his voice as he tries to come up with the words to explain himself. 

“Spencer, if.. If it’s different then I think you should leave. If you don’t love me the same way you loved her, then there’s no point starting something.” 

“Y/N, please.” 

“No, Spencer. I have spent six years of my life filled with nothing but love for you. I wake up and think about you, I go to bed and you’re still there in the back of my mind. My every action is informed by your presence and I am so, so tired. So if you do not feel the same way, you need to turn around and leave this apartment.” 

The silence between you is thick, as you stare up at him through your tears, face stern as you push him away. 

He gathers his things. Moves towards the door and doesn’t say anything, and just as you’re about to break down, to let the sob burst from your chest in an agonized wail, you hear your front door close behind him, and you’re left alone in the empty apartment, stuck in the purgatory of your love for him, unable to move an inch. 

[aingeal98]

"Tim is the bat kid the most like Bruce." The one year where Tim acted as close to Bruce as he possibly could was the most depressing and miserable time of his life and not something he ever wants to go back to. You tell him he's Batman in the future and he puts a gun to his head. Sure he has similarities but it's very much like Dick where if you tell him he's just like Bruce he'd immediately spiral about what the hell he was doing wrong and what changes he has to make. He's different from Bruce and he's very happy with those differences! He thinks it's a good thing! Tim loves and respects Bruce but he's also suffered due to Bruce's flaws, and so he very notably does his best to never replicate those flaws. Of course sometimes he fails, and he has plenty of flaws of his own. But he wouldn't pull say, a Tower of Babel unless he's at rock bottom. And he'd view it very differently from Bruce. Which isn't a character beat that's any different from Dick or Duke btw. They'd all be capable if pushed to their limits but they hate that and never want to go there, which makes them different from Bruce who goes there all the time.

"So then who is the bat kid most like Bruce?" Well you're not gonna believe what answer I, a Cassandra Wayne fan, have for that question.

[romchat]

Unknown (2024) visual analysis (ep. 1-8): How to film heartache

This show.

The writing and acting continue to be fantastic, but I feel like I haven't seen enough appreciation for Unknown's cinematography, which captures the heartache of Qian and Yuan's changing relationship so beautifully.

Here are some of my favorite moments of visual storytelling so far...

Framing & Composition

Something that I immediately noticed about Unknown is how much dirty framing it uses. "Dirtying the frame" is when a cinematographer uses architecture, nature, objects, or even people in the foreground to add depth to a shot. In earlier episodes, we often see Qian and Yuan framed together by everyday household objects.

These shots emphasize the uniqueness of their relationship: they are brothers because of the domesticity surrounding them and yet at the same time the framing almost tucks them away into a private space of their own. Their relationship is born from yet separate from the familial space they share with Lilli.

So when Yuan drunkenly confesses his feelings and shatters any lies Qian might have been telling himself about their complex relationship, the camera language loses its earlier intimacy.

We suddenly see more medium and long (versus close-up) clean shots where the characters are surrounded by tons of negative space, isolated from each other.

I also don't think it's an accident that we start seeing more dirty frames again once Yuan leaves for America and Qian realizes how much he misses him.

The New Years scene is a perfect example of this. As Qian miserably cheers an absent Yuan, we see the camera subtly pans to the side of the table where he'd usually sit. No one has been able to occupy that private space at home or in Qian's heart.

Visual Parallelism

In a previous post, I've talked about how visual parallelism (when we link characters, events, storylines, etc. through a shared image) can signal major changes in the relationship between two characters, and the show uses this technique in multiple ways. (Yuan’s cheeky and completely satisfying “is there something you want me to do?” in Episode 8’s seatbelt scene, for one.)

But I think the most striking moment is when Yuan asks Qian to confront his own feelings at the end of Episode 8.

When we look at the composition, camera angles, and actor blocking (how the actors are positioned in relation to one another) we can see that the scene directly mirrors the moment that Yuan gifts Qian with cufflinks in Episode 6. In that episode, Yuan is shot from a high angle, making him look even younger and more vulnerable, while Qian cups his face from above, anchoring him as he tries to give misguided advice:

Qian: I actually feel sorry for you. Isn't it tiring to love him? Yuan: It is. It's so tiring to like someone you shouldn't like. Qian: Then what are you doing? Why are you limiting yourself?

It's notable then that during the last scene of Episode 8, the roles are reversed and the blocking and camera language changes accordingly. Throughout Episodes 7-8, we can see the ways Yuan adopts a more mature approach to his interactions with Qian. He has made it clear that he still cares about him but he will only make another move if Qian clearly expresses his desires. Now it's Qian who is the most unsure and vulnerable, with Yuan anchoring him:

Yuan: Wei Qian, don't you like Wei Zhiyuan? If you do, is it only because we're brothers? This thing about us, is it that you don't want it or that you don't dare?

Like Qian had advised him years ago, Yuan now asks why Qian insists on limiting himself by denying what he wants.

Bonus Parallelism:

Both Yuan and Qian's kiss fantasies mirror each other as well.

[ystrike1]

Concubine Walkthrough - By BongBong (9.5/10)

What if it was all a dream, and that was ok? An entire world dedicated to one love. There is so much darkness in this story. So many messed up questions. AI. Gender identity. Good people dying of illness. Innocent people dying by poison. Giving up on life. Giving away your life for someone else. Every bad thing ever happens, but this is such a happy story. Happiness feels more real when you earn it, after all.

I'm not going to crack any jokes for this one. This particular webtoon has won several prestigious awards. It was written and drawn with passion and talent, and it also happens to be an epic obsessive love story.

It's about a girl who falls into a dating game. A loser. A girl who lost her dad. Her future. Her chance to go to college. She tried to jump out of a window one day, and a friend with a crush on her saved her. Another friend offered her a chance. A life in a virtual world.

She takes it.

She is reborn beautiful. The Emperor of the fake world loves her. Worships her. She was placed in the body of an awful villainess, but she's so wonderful that the Emperor immediately notices she is a new soul.

Try to remember.

The Emperor is an AI being. Yona, the player, came in with two friends to forget.

Yona falls in love for real. Yona shows "Sunshine" all of the games quests and tips. The Emperor doesn't really exist. She basically creates him. She names him.

Her reality causes madness in him.

Yona is naive at first. Maybe there is a way to bring Sunshine with her....but there isn't.

Pain and war and lies and betrayal bursts out of her naive fantasy.

The game repeats 103 times.

The Emperor begins to think he is a toy, and Yona is only capable of loving the male player who saved her.

The world ends in fire.

Doha, another player, does love her.

Doha can be what the Emperor can NEVER be. Sunshine just can't go to the real world, but Doha can log off....the game gets corrupted.

Nobody can log off now.

Memory loss. More obsession. Confusion. Yona forgets details about her real life. Time keeps going backwards. Poor Sunshine is powerless to save his true love, who can no longer remember why she wanted to forget in the first place.

He uses the secret admin room to destroy everything. Everything. Yona and her game friends are trapped. Scientists on the outside are saving them, or trying to. Sunshine decides to make Yona hate him. Then he will use the admin room to delete every trace of himself, so no one but Yona will ever know he existed. That way Yona can be his forever, in a twisted way.

It's not real. It shouldn't matter, but that's not how people work. The AI humans in the game adapt. Grow. Change. Obsess. The sweet ones that die get loving funerals.

They exist.

Yona does something selfless.

The Emperor does not succeed.

Yona gives her body to Ranhee. The evil original concubine who was just a miserable puppet. She gives that pitiful, but interesting, character a new reality. She stays behind, in the game with Sunshine. He might be the Emperor, but to her he's Sunshine first.

Doha wakes up, and the game is modified one last time. A time acceleration button is pressed, and the world AI simulation doesn't end until the end. The heat death of that universe. The quantum computer that made the game is destroyed, but in that time Yona lived her whole life. The game was allowed to grow and become a real world. In that second a new humanity lived their lives fully.

Yona was truly happy in that blink of an eye.

[mochippyyy]

Ven and Vel getting jobs xD

Dancer AU!! (technically Veneer isn't a dancer in this but my explanation will be on the bottom! TLDR it was just cool so yippee [there's lore!!!!!!!])

Also! sorry@imadumdumjewel for the late reply!

If you guys req anything, I'll get to it, just may be a tad late...

Anywho! I ran a lil poll on Twitter to decide on the types of jobs they would have so here we go:

So I actually forgot to put dancer Vel/artist Ven because I kinda thought Ven would kinda fit the thing but after I finished this art I was pretty happy I didn't put it on there lol.

I honestly think that the other job options seemed pretty interesting, but no one really suggested any other jobs, and almost everyone was enthralled with the idea of dancer Ven & Vel.

For Veneer:

At first, my friend and I were planning this, but nothing really felt right to us. I did suggest Ballerino, but it didn't feel like something Veneer would do without Velvet, because they kinda come in pairs. Gymnast was also a suggestion, but after a couple minutes, it was swiftly discarded because I didn't want to draw Veneer's toes.

Anywho, while searching for other options, ice skating appeared, and my friend suggested an interesting idea as to

Lore time:

When Veneer was young, his parents pushed him towards traditionally male hobbies, such as sports and more sports. When his dad saw a flyer for an ice hockey team, he signed him up immediately. However, some mischievous kid had taped a different number to the hockey flyer, so Veneer's father ended up signing him up for figure skating instead.

At first, Veneer thought he was out of place, after all, the ratio of boys to girls was significant and he found himself to be the only one in that class. He didn't enjoy it much and regretted that he didn't join Velvet in her breakdancing course. However, as he unwillingly went to classes, he slowly started gaining a love for the sport and noticed how beautiful it was.

That led him to go down into professional figure skating and join competitions, eventually leading him to go down in history. For Velvet

My friend suggested swapping traditionally male and female dance styles, which led to the eventual conclusion: breakdancing. Velvet is a strong-willed character who would definitely try to get her way (as shown in the trailer of the movie) and take the classes that she liked.

Lore time:

When Veneer got signed up to do ice hockey, Velvet felt like she didn't have to deal with her little brother all day, and felt that she had a lot of time to herself. At first, she found a lot of things to do every day, running to places, going to parties, and just generally having fun.

At this point, Veneer was still unwilling to go to figure skating classes, (turns out Velvet was the mischievous kid who changed the number on the ice hockey flyer into a figure skating course phone number) but since his father had already paid for a year, he had to go anyways. Velvet would purposely use this to upset Veneer when she didn't get what she wanted, but then would accidentally make Veneer cry, resulting in her getting lectured by her parents, and Velvet holding back tears as she apologized to Veneer (she was totes in the fault here tho).

She realized that the more free time she had, the more her parents would lecture her. She decided right then and there that she would sign up for a class. She spent days, scrolling her phone and watching videos of different skills to decide what she wanted to do. However, nothing caught her eye.

Then, one day, she saw a kid do a flip, and slip and fall miserably. First, she took a video and laughed, and then thought to herself, "Hey, I could do that waaaayyyyy better. That kid's a failure!" And so she threw herself into learning it, but unsurprisingly, she fell flat on her face.

She was unhappy with this result, so she immediately went to her parents and asked them to sign her up for a breakdancing course. However, she had a tendency to give up when things got annoying/hard, so her parents turned her away each time. However, both the nonstop pestering and the fact that she no longer was bullying Veneer (because she was too busy following her parents around and throwing tantrums), they finally gave in.

From then on, she started breakdancing classes, and Veneer was upset because now his sister got to do something she liked, but Veneer was stuck in ice skating hell. He was very unhappy for some time, but then decided, "If she's gonna be happy, I gotta be happier. I gotta upstage her". So, he took to ice skating and started focusing all his efforts on it.

Velvet, seeing her twin brother become increasingly devoted to learning the trade she had forced him into while she had just started to get bored of breakdancing, felt a spark of competition and decided to practice harder.

Her parents were really impressed. Periodt. Now they are famous both nationally (Veneer) and on the streets (Velvet, for breakdancing, not giving up). YIPPEE

THE END

[plottwiststudios]

Furina Deserved More Empathy

Most of you are here because you dig my writing for "Women of Xal", but please bear with me on this: Furina is a worthy character to study, respect, and love. To me, she is Genshin Impact's best character, and certainly my favorite from the game.

But although her characterization was top tier, the characters and writing around Furina were just... so ugly to her in a few areas that I believe are worth talking about. Even if you think the Fontaine arc was perfect and beyond reproach with how Furina was handled at the end, please at least hear me out. I promise I do come with not only my empathetic insight, but a writer's with a keen eye for the unfair, as well. Everyone, strap in and click that spoiler line for more~

"But Furina is only human, isn't she? Even though she has had a long life, her mind is no stronger than that of any other ordinary human being. I cannot begin to fathom what she has had to endure. It must have been torture for her." - Neuvillette

This quote comes immediately after Neuvillette realizes that his partner in crime, Furina, has been playing a role of a god far outside of her true personality every (perceived) second of every day for 500 years without end. Fooling the world, and keeping the secret that she was a mere human was crucial. If she didn't, her nation would have met oblivion via drowning, according to an increasingly real prophecy. If you don't know the story/why, it's complicated, here's the cutscene. Collaborating with her divine 'half', she commits to this agonizingly long performance willingly by weighing her own happiness with the lives of the people. And does that take a toll on her?

Yes! It got bad enough to where she started crying without realizing she was -- in front of a citizen she of course had to deceive. She had to use her vast experience to play it off, and, well, you see how easily that citizen bought it, and you can see how Furina is handling that situation, even if you're not used to Genshin's models. What I'm trying to get at here is, Furina carried Fontaine's salvation on her back for 500 years. In complete secret and isolation. And as we are playing a video game, we naturally see to the finale of her 500 year performance...

By putting her on trial as a fraud god!

Now, although I felt grimy from the jump about the whole "Trick Furina into her own public trial", the plan itself is legitimately justified from the player / accusing party. She played her role too well, and now her own nation and allies think she's not taking the threat of her nation seriously. (The threat? Ironically the flooding she's trying to prevent) Her peers do know she's hiding something. So in a desperate gambit to get her to talk and hopefully give them something to stop the incoming flood, they trick her into arriving at her own trial. And, I believe my necessity, she is given more trauma for her troubles before this trial ends. You can watch it all here.

Even for players who didn't figure out Furina's big secret, this trial was BRUTAL to watch, and the fact the player character initiated it by trying promising Furina that her secret can be safe with the player -- WHILE the player was actively and secretly transporting Furina to her trial is just... cutthroat. Necessary given the lack of context (mostly), but cutthroat. I'm glad Furina considered her options with entrusting the player, but ultimately would have decided not to. Because we didn't deserve Furina's trust.

Long miserable story short? Furina is judged guilty and sentenced to death, but she doesn't care, because to her, she spent 500 years, only to think she "failed" and now everyone will drown and die. So she's left essentially dissociating with only tears to show consciousness. Longer story short? She didn't fail! Her trial was all part of the plan her divine half cooked up without telling her about the trial! To save the nation. (Prophecies, am I right?) And the nation is saved! All because Furina kept up the act for 500 years -- well past her emotional breaking point. Like, well, well, well past her breaking point.

Most importantly: Furina is free to be a regular human that no longer has to perform. She no longer has to rule as a god. So what's the first thing she hears from us? (Link for the conversation)

tldr: "We sure Kathryn gave us the right address we obtained without permission? Wow, Furina's living situation got a whole lot worse different after she stepped down from ruler."

If you're wondering if I skipped a few cutscenes covering how Furina got there and how she's doing, don't worry! Same here: After the story's climax, Neuvillette tells us that Furina steps down and numbly packed her bags and hecked off for peace and quiet. Did we ever VISIT this woman after asking her to trust us before destroying that request for trust? Did ANYONE besides Neuvillette give her an apology, or go out of their way to check in on her besides Clorinde? Am I supposed to assume that the same writers who keep doing insensitive things, has a staggering fear of dark skin, and seldom have enough courage to trust the audience, are expecting us to fill in the gaps of time with the most positive outcome that Furina was apologized to and supported off-screen? And hey, if you're on team "We had no choice, given the circumstance; no apologies needed", then look at it like a human, not (just) an apologist! If YOU underwent 500 years of never being you, but an exaggerated trope for the world, and at the end, that world temporarily rejects you in public, cutthroat fashion, is this how you would like to be treated?

An organization gave out your address to help the player

The player only visits you to help NPCs

Pressure you to perform yet again, this time for fun!!!

Express how your boundaries for no-acting actively hurt the NPCs

No noted thanks or conversation about your sacrifices

The writer to your life railroads you into feeling bad for boundaries

Someone dryly states, for her own reasons, that you were inactive

Made fun of for your lifestyle decisions post-freedom from acting

The writer of your life railroads you into singing for the NPCs

Some more I am probably going to regret not remembering

Even people who haven't played the game, but read this will note that something went amiss. One or two of these bullet points can be seen as fine or not-horrible when isolated, but literally all of this happened to Furina. Even if you want to say that all of these are properly addressed offscreen and not mentioned in the game, then what about the writer's desire to resonate with the audience?

To the writers of this game who obviously do not take words to heart: We resonate with Furina just fine. She's a beautifully written character and I have nothing but the fiercest of respect for her. But we don't resonate with how she was treated after her 500 years of torture ended. Not by the characters or writers. As writers, how did you WANT us to react to these insensitive scenes? Why? Did you think the lines of dialogue through from a humane angle, or were you stuck in the immediate present of writing a "funny"? Did you think about the cost of not letting the most tortured character in the country have any scenes after her trial until we're looking for her to help people we've never met before? Was the tonal whiplash wise in your eyes? Could you find no better way to get Furina comfortable to sing and get her vision? Why do I get the feeling that even an author with no experience might have known better than to do some of the things you decided to do to Furina? As writers, do you think everything I've stated is what she deserves, or even the natural course of events for a character as important and as good as Furina? Is that the extent of your writing prowess and creativity?

This is a story about a nation of justice. So where's Furina's justice?

[mymarifae]

does anyone want to join me on the aventurine/argenti train. it's got all the perks of being as funny as any other argenti ship - especially given the random absurdity of their first meeting. what the hell was argenti doing in the depths of the nihility? who even knows anymore man. but like also i think it has the potential to be really sweet?

aventurine hasn't let anyone In since his sister died. he's long since forgotten how to Trust, and Love, and how to BE Loved. and this, combined with enormous amounts of survivor's guilt and trauma and being treated as an object, has really done a number on his self-esteem. he doesn't act like it (because he's learned that it's dangerous to be vulnerable; it's the one gamble he's not willing to take), but 2.1 gave us that glimpse into his inner dialogue and it is Bad in there

between his conversation with acheron, the note veritas left for him, and finding a sense of closure in the apparition of his younger self, he's on track to becoming better. we can see it in the way he pretty much immediately reaches out to the trailblazer to get some things off his chest once he gets his phone working again. and the way he's accepting what is basically a form of therapy from the doctors of chaos. but his self-hatred has been building up for years, and it's going to take a long time to unpack and unlearn all of that

so like, in comes argenti, right? he's a loud show-off, but he is SO earnest. he sees the beauty in everything and everyone. he's kind, and gentle, and so full of love. he also comes off as a bit... lonely to me? he's spent so much of his life chasing after idrila's shadow, and only catching a glimpse of them in his many near-death experiences (and isn't that something to think about...........). he's not like, secretly miserable or faking or anything - i think his exuberance is 1000% genuine. but humans are social creatures; everyone wants and requires at least some form of closeness and intimacy. to have a love to pursue in This realm... someone he can see and hold without needing to have one foot in an early grave . i think that would be good for him. that's all

anyway, it's clear that argenti was pretty enchanted by aventurine

like yeah that's kind of just how he talks normally but !?@,%&#& that's a lot of awfully romantic things to say about one specific person out of the several you apparently rescued (??????? god i love this guy he makes no sense. literally why are you even here bud). it seems that aventurine's more subdued state left an impression on him too, and well wouldn't it be pretty in character for him to start popping in randomly... as he does, because he can apparently just go wherever the fuck he wants. to check on this sad yet oh so beautiful peacock.. to try to bring a true smile to his face... to show him how kind and beautiful the universe can be......

i think aventurine might have a hard time laughing off offers of comfort and company and the beginnings of a courtship if it comes from someone like argenti. this man couldn't be disingenuous if he tried. he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve as much as he rips it out of his chest to show you. it'll be a learning curve regardless - aventurine is too used to needing to constantly prove his worth to keep anyone around and to keep them from hurting him

but do you see it. do you see the vision. do you see how Sweet this could be. aventurine is about to receive more roses than he'll know what to do with

[smokersbaby]

What is true romance for Smoker? If you have any headvanons for it, I'd love to see them!

I loved this simple but adorable request, It was so heartwarming to write and I hope it has the same effect on you just as it was for me.

Characters: Smoker TW: none, just fluff Word count: + 1,1k Author's note: I found some material on the internet about love language, so I decided to write some headcanons for Smoker about it.

The 5 Love Languages of Smoker

1 - Acts of service: Smoker is for sure into the "act of service" kind of romance: he adores giving his partner his time by doing something that will make you happy for sure (even if it's not that obvious, Smoker is a careful observer when it comes to his s/o and manages to understand what you like and dislike just observing your reactions through everyday life), and above all knowing that he has little to no time, due to his full-time job as a Vice Admiral, makes his actions even more valuable. 

Smoker would find a way to show you their love through everyday efforts, just as bringing you your favourite snack when he sees you in a bad mood, knowing it will cheer you up for sure, or handling you something to drink in the middle of the afternoon without even asking for it, just because he imagined his S/O was thirsty. 

Once, when you were outside doing some kind of everyday commissions, he decided to try to cook your favourite dish for dinner. As you returned, you found out how he failed his task successfully, burning the stoves. He felt so miserable for not being able to give you a decent meal but your heart melted seeing that tough and grumpy man putting all himself into cooking just to put a smile on your face. 

2 - Words of affirmation: let's be honest, Smoker hates catchphrases such as the classic "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?". Furthermore, he's not good with words and prefers to express his affection towards his s/o with actions. But sometimes words of affirmation escape his mouth, and every single time it happens Smoker's words are genuine (and they come out of nowhere, without even realizing that his sentences sound like compliments until he sees you blush after hearing them).

Once, after returning from his job to your shared house, it was impossible not to notice how tired and a bit down in the dumps he was. As he entered the front door, Smoker embraced you in a tight and comforting hug: that simple gesture was all he needed at that moment.

"My home..." he mumbled while caressing your hair and holding your body pressed against his to feel your comforting warmth. 

As he spoke that simple word, you immediately realized that he wasn't referring to the fact that he was finally home, but he was somehow addressing you as his home, implicitly saying that you were his safe place. 

3 - Gifts: thank God he's not the kind of guy who needs to buy you expensive gifts to show you his love. On the other side, if you are accustomed to receiving lots of presents from your S/O, it can be a bit strange for you to understand his way to express his feeling at the beginning of your relationship. 

He may think that expensive gifts aren't a sign of romance if there isn't a true reason behind them, they are probably just a waste of money since happiness doesn't come from this kind of thing for him.

As said before, it's more common for him to make acts of service that can be considered little gifts to make his S/O smiles, such as giving them snacks or something they truly like eating, bringing them to see their favourite places together and enjoying a peaceful evening looking at the sea and drinking beers.

On the other way, if you look for a way to melt Smoker's heart, you can give him any kind of present, even the silliest and simplest one (like a handmade bracelet or a piece of cake) will make him all flustered and a blushing mess because it's his S/O that gave him that. He'll keep that gift of yours forever (not the cake tough, he'll eat that right away).

4 - Quality time: his favourite way to spend some quality time with you it's through cuddling: he'll lay in the bed right beside you, his arms wrapping around your body as he spoons you, making you feel protected in his warm embrace. That kind of safety you feel in his arms it cannot be found anywhere else but with Smoker since in these kinds of intimate moments he just stays silent and enjoys your presence. 

That's also his favourite way to fall asleep since he can keep you close to him and snuggle against your body. It may be difficult for you since he's 209 cm tall, but Smoker adores being the little spoon sometimes, just to understand how his S/O feels when they are in his arms (he won't tell you he likes it though).

But cuddling isn't the only thing that can be called quality time with him, since he's busy with work most of the time when he finds time to stay with you during the day Smoker tries to take you on simple dates, knowing you'll enjoy spending your time with him not only at home.

Once he brought you to a hidden tiny beach where the two of you had a picnic while looking at the sea and as soon as he understood that you loved that kind of thing so much, he tried to bring you there as often as he could (consider that he'll probably propose to his S/O there, in their special place).

5 - Physical touch: as you can already imagine, Smoker isn't the kind of partner that likes to show his love to the world.

For him, it doesn't come naturally to kiss or hug you in front of others, that's because every single touch counts as an intimate and shared moment between you two and he feels uncomfortable knowing that someone else might watch sharing your love. 

That's why other people addressed him as grumpy or rough, but if someone doesn't like to be touched in public it doesn't mean that they're a cold-hearted person. On the contrary, Smoker is a bit of a softie, and when he's alone with his S/O (as soon as he starts to get accustomed to physical touch and this way of showing love) he can become that kind of man that hugs you all the time if he has the possibility. 

Above all, he loves hugging you from behind when you don't see him coming and placing his chin on your head.

Talking about smooching, he loves to kiss your forehead as a sign of protectiveness towards you, he starts to kiss your face all over if he sees you sad or crying, making you all ticklish and laughing because of the way he smooches your face as to say "don't cry, I am here".

[hsrlanedefencesquad]

Ok so I've finally played the haze story and the premier was ok, nothing special, nothing bad about it (same way I've always felt about alice's other books so maybe this writing style just doesn't resonate with me) but I still have high hopes for this story...it has so much opportunity to get better

Things I didn't like:

Alice should have explored on Lada and veraya's relationship more, they didn't feel close to me, so much so that I wasn't moved by the sister's death at all

Dragan - what's this guy's problem??? No seriously, I hate this "boy is mean to you because he secretly likes you" CHILDISH ASS TROPE. It's not even a sort of dislike that I can digest from a red flag, no he is full on being mean and insulting & looks like he hates mc with every fiber of his being (I mean he literally clenches his jaw when he sees her coming) I don't like this (and this is coming from someone who loves romancing red flags) I really hope he has a GREAT excuse for why he acts that way other than he has a secret crush on her or else that would be stupid and I will use all my diamonds in making him miserable anyway I can

I was really expecting better from an RC writer not to do this annoying ass trope ESPECIALLY because GOE has already done it and it was no less ANNOYING...like what's going on with the "Boy is mean to you because he secretly likes you & you think he is in love with your dead twin sister but he is actually in love with you" trope?? Did Alice just take inspiration from anastasia's cas route or did a book recently blow up in book twt that had this trope, making other authors go crazy & venture into it or what?! Stop it, it's annoying & childish 🫵🏾

It's just been 2 episodes and I can already see that Lada has little to no backbone, why did anastasia write Lada being in love with that dragan idiot as the canon?? No like even on the determined/stubbornness path....Lada just keeps blushing like a fool thinking about dragan immediately after the idiot says the most insulting thing about her ever, even when I hadn't taken diamond choices with him, she was already blushing?? I hate my mcs being canonically in love with a character especially when said character is a jerk

Not only that but she also seems pathetic over him too, she obsesses over any little interaction her twin sister has with him, EVEN IN HER DEATH & FUNERAL, like what??? your sister just died and the main thing that made you finally drop a tear was whether dragan's gift was sincere or because he liked your sister so he gave you a gift because she asked.....like I would have been able to accept her having a crush on that idiot if she hated herself for it too or had strong internal monologues struggling with liking someone who despises her, like girl have some dignity please. I don't think I have found any mc so pathetic (in how she treats her romantic feelings aspect) in just 2 episodes.....plus she just feels so empty written (yes it has only been 2 episodes so we can't know much about her but still) it feels like there isn't even anything to know about her and please don't bring up lane because that is a very differently written character, she is written as cold and apathetic but we still could feel out her personality but lada? she isn't even described as being cold or empty, just average yet she still feels so.....meh

(I will humbly offer my apologies and give Alice all the praise if she progresses in the upcoming episodes, please note this isn't my analysis for the WHOLE story just this 2 little episodes so yes I do know there is still room for more and I am excitedly waiting on it. This is not a hate post)

Good thing I can say about Lada is that all her sprites are pretty and even though she feels bad about being average compared to her sister, she doesn't go the pick-me "woe is me, oh look at me I'm not like other girls route or develop some grudge or inferiority complex towards her sister for being better that her, No she accepts the way she is and instead find something else she loves doing that makes her whole)

The races

I either don't have eyes or I'm delusional because let me tell you, I haven't seen ONE black character in this story yet that was all the russians could complain of, either racists are that obsessed with black people that they pretty much see them every where, they aren't or there are some hidden characters that maybe I didn't see because where are the black people everyone was talking about? Only black person I saw was the opportunity to choose your mc's sprite

Infact, the race that I kept on seeing was asian (this also seemed weird to me but I googled it and it says slavic people extended to some parts of asia so they rightfully belong there & I don't really know what the russians have to complain about)

[scaly-freaks]

The wolf den is one of my favorite books. Really changed the way I write relationships and characters.

(Your) Amara is such a lovable character. You write her with so much love and your love and care for her really shines through in the story. Her vulnerabilities and strength makes her so easy to love and genuinely relate to. She’s a uch a cool and unique character. I’m a huge Amara fan

I’m absolutely loving Alys and Amara ! They’re so weird and adorable? That scene where Alys is acting all creepy imitating aegon and Amara’s like “omg that’s so cool I want to be a witch” was kind of wholesome. I know that Alys and Larys are probably playing some bigger game, but I’m hoping that Alys could be a friend to Amara.

And poor little Jaehaerys and jaehaera!!! As much as I believe that aegon genuinely loves his children, at this point he kind of sees them as cute toys and not as actual human beings. I’m not justifying him separating Amara from Jaehaera, but I also don’t think he understands the severity of his actions - for both Amara and jaehaera - who needs her mom!

Aegon leaving his kids to the nannies was so sad. Alicent’s gone and Amara is banned from seeing jaehaera. But Amara and Jaehaerys bonding was adorable.

Aegon is being his usual self, making everyone’s life miserable because he feels rejected by someone he loves. He’s really not as smart as he thinks he is. Getting a new lover to make Amara jealous? He has tried that before and it didn’t work!! He’s just reaffirming her belief that she shouldn’t let herself love him.

Aahh thank you so much :')

I hear so many i don't read OC fics and urgh I hate OC fics they're just author self-inserts so it made me a little 'eh' about it at first. I think OCs are fucking amazing, and they may start out as author self-inserts but as they experience more of the plot, they take on a life of their own, so I really don't understand the vitriol against them. Besides, all literature is author self-insert to an extent. It is coming out of someone's brain, and you expect it not to be coloured with who they are as a person? Don't be daft. Even y/n fiction is author self-insert because they're the ones writing it.

Though I suppose I understand any objections if the OC in question is a Targaryen sister/daughter, rides three dragons, kills Alicent and Alys Rivers and Aegon, rides Aemond, makes Rhaenyra queen, and then becomes queen herself.

Not to get kinky over the Alys-Amara thing (age gap...I support this one), but I had this vivid scene in my head where she and Amara...you know, do stuff, and in the middle of it, Alys starts speaking with Aegon's voice, so it's like he's there with them. And it wreaks havoc on Amara, and she orgasms almost immediately with Alys between her legs (and Aegon's voice down there too...okay I'll stop). Anyway, I bet Amara would be the first to try and suggest Alys fucks the pair of them together, and I don't know how Aegon feels about sharing but I hope he says yes (it'd be the first time he actually sees Amara being pleasured by someone else, whereas she's seen him literally pounding Mirian).

Aegon absolutely loves his children, and I think is afraid his inactivity in regards to them will turn him into Viserys 2.0. But being too proactive is also detrimental as we're now seeing. I do headcanon that both Jaehaera and Jaehaerys grow up to be very violent people, but they actively understand their father and in an almost sociopathic way, hide the worst of themselves from him so he never suspects a thing. Everyone else suffers, but Aegon of course believes his own kids (ironically, he does turn into Viserys but just takes a different road).

"Aegon is being his usual self, making everyone’s life miserable because he feels rejected by someone he loves." I love this because yep, exactly. He can be very clever when he wants to be, but not when he's clouded by love, and the need to be loved the way he loves others. He thinks just because someone isn't crawling all over him and whimpering and blubbering the way he devolves to, that means they don't love him as much. He's not good at empathy, which is something I wrote in specifically as part of his canon character being raised as a prince. It was just a bit of fun. Of course it was, Aegon. It was fun for you, but you don't understand how it couldn't possibly be fun for someone else.

I didn't want to fall into the trap of getting Amara to "fix" him though, so she makes her own mistakes in regards to his behaviour, and then suffers/makes him suffer. She still doesn't get why he acts the way he does, but sometimes it clicks and she does what's best for herself (as she should).

[paragonrobits]

aparently the Disliked ATLA Ship discourse at the moment is not merely arguments about Fire Lady Katara, but people who don't seem to understand her character as much as they think they do believe that the only option for Katara is to either hide from the Fire Nation (??? by what? going HOME?) or rule over it

and the first point is, yes she WOULD want to go home. Keeping her homeland safe and returning home without living in fear of her father never coming home again because of the war; these are things she pretty implicitly wants.

secondly, there seems to be a power trip involved in the idea of her as Fire Lady. Again, this has little connection to canon; as popular as the idea of Katara becoming Fire Lady and being co-ruler of the Fire Nation is, there is no basis in canon for the consort of a Fire Lord having any political power or even being particularly relevant to history. The vast majority of the wives of the Fire Lords aren't even known; they're functionally non-entities who can only be stated to exist because their children had to come from somewhere. They're certainly never given any real importance and there is no indication of them being involved in politics or having any power at all.

It seems the only one with power there is the Fire Lord; unless you're suggested Katara conquer and rule over the Fire Nation as a tyrant (you know, exactly like the people who devastated her homeland and almost wiped out her culture), she's certainly not going to get any political power.

This isn't even getting into the problem of her being a Water Tribeswoman. These particular fans really love to exist in an alternate reality composed entirely of their headcanons on how the Fire Nation operates, as shown by how much they make a lot of meta saying 'oh the Fire Nation isn't REALLY colonizing or rascist despite canonically having massive rallies yelling about how fire is the superior element to triumph over the savage barbarians in other lands or FIRE NATION COLONIES being referenced repeatedly'.

But again, even a small village of otherwise friendly people, upon discovering Katara is from the Water Tribe, IMMEDIATELY turned on her when they found out she wasn't Fire Nation, and their choice of words 'you're not so bad for a waterbender' sounds a LOT like them saying a relatively child-friendly way of saying 'you're a credit to your race'

at worst, Katara would be subject to repeated assassination attempts by Fire Nation nobles that resent someone they consider a barbarian in charge. At best it would still be a profoundly exhausting thing spending the rest of her life far from home, surrounded by racists that hate her, and laboring until her death to help a nation that tried to destroy her people, and almost did.

Power is, as Iroh says, overrated. The glamour of a life of luxury and wealth has no indication of being interesting to Katara (and she may even find the concept repulsive), and would undoubtedly just be miserable.

[mywingsareonwheels]

On "Endeavour" series 9 (a critical/disappointed but affectionate post)

Cut for length, spoilers, and criticism :)

I've been thinking so much (too much ;-) ) about the ending of Endeavour since it came out. Sometimes joyfully, sometimes wistfully, mostly sadly. Occasionally angrily.

What series 9, and especially 9.3 really needed to do was a) wind up and honour the character arcs/plot arcs of Endeavour and b) set things up for Inspector Morse. And honestly, after months of pondering and thinking and hearing other people's views on it (both those I agree with and those I don't, the latter actually including Shaun Evans's ;-) )... I think it did at least partially fail in both those aims. But I think it failed ambitiously and lovingly. Which matters.

The Bad Stuff:-

The key problem Russell Lewis has said he had in writing s9 was the Thursday family and the fact that Morse never mentions any of them in IM, at least unless Joan really is the Mrs Strange of that period of time.

This problem was made worse by the fact that they are four of the most lovable characters in Endeavour, and that the relationship between Morse and Fred Thursday is the key one within it. So I can see the logic! Something awful has to happen. And given Morse's romantic interest in Joan, the Thursday family generational war trauma, and Fred's PTSD-ridden tendencies towards explosive violence when he's feeling protective of his loved ones or other vulnerable people... I can see why Lewis went with the solution he did.

The trouble is... solving the Problem of the Thursdays I think took over series 9 to such an extent that the writing managed to:-

a) honestly? fridge the character development and perceived quality of all four Thursdays (especially Fred and Joan, both of whom I think got a really rough deal tbh) in order to further Morse's long-term arc, which really is a bit bloody unfair after 9 seasons. Very very damn unfair in fact. And... uncompassionate, which is awful given that overall Endeavour is one of the most compassionate shows I've ever seen.

b) undermine Jakes's return by giving a necessary incompleteness to his search for Big Pete (and also massively underusing Jack Laskey, but honestly the fact that series 9 was only three episodes long did cause problems there).

c) turn Big Pete/Raymond Kennet into just a plot device for the aforementioned fridging of Fred's character development which... actually I admit didn't fully notice until I read a fic chapter today which did the opposite, but oof.

d) undermine Max's friendship with Morse in Inspector Morse by ignoring it completely and implying that Morse is Alone Forever after the events of Endeavour which just Isn't The Case (and again, James Bradshaw was shockingly underused). Gods could we have done with at least one scene where it was recognised that Max isn't going anywhere and they like each other so much. <3

e) actually? Undermine the complexity of the Morse of Inspector Morse too. Because DCI Morse? Is not constantly miserable and dour and closed off and unable to connect with people. He has friends, he has choir, he can make literary references in the station and have a random PC pick them up, he has a positively impish sense of humour at times, he still has his wonderful relationship with Joyce. His house is gorgeous and thoroughly well-loved. He immediately warms to Lewis who is a lot like Thursday at times, and he clearly rather enjoys Lewis teasing him so much. He is kind and compassionate, and sometimes his manner with witnesses is very like Thursday's avuncular best moments. Sure, DCI Morse is also difficult and grumpy and most definitely an alcoholic; he struggles to open up fully to people and never manages to pull off a long-term romantic relationship. But he's not a permanent ice king. He's actually a lot more like the earlier DC Morse at times than the Morse of the last few minutes of 9.3! The whole "I was betrayed by Thursday and now I will never trust anyone ever again ever" thing just wasn't necessary in order to set up Morse in his 40s and 50s. If anything, it leaves open the question of how he navigates what's actually a rather larger character jump than it would have been if Endeavour had ended earlier. Which just... ngyargh. (Also, I mean... I'm not aro, very emphatically not, but even I can see that there's something more than a bit problematic about the suggestion that Morse's life is tragic forever because he's usually single.)

Here's the other thing though: the one respect in which he is very closed-off even with Lewis in Inspector Morse is that he never tells Lewis about anyone important in his past unless he actually has to (usually because they die a violent death and his connection with the victim comes up). Never mentioning the Thursdays, Dorothea, Bright, Jakes? It didn't need that intense an explanation. At least, not a "he can't even bear to think about Fred or Joan again" explanation. It just means none of them died a violent death in Thames Valley during his time as DCI which, you know, I am extremely fricking glad about! ;-) He could press the still-beloved Thursday family to his heart like flowers, and that would be enough. He could still be getting postcards from all of them right up to the end (and I'm persisting in believing that he does ;-) ).

To unpack point a) a bit:- I mean where Joan's concerned I think a lot of us agree on this. I actually do like Strange! But it is horrible that we never hear anything about Joan's social work in series 9; it's implied that she's giving up her job in order to marry him. And Joan finding herself and moving towards saving the world one woman at a time was beautiful. I mean, there was no obligation to have everyone have a happy ending series 9! But the ending of that arc of Joan's without explanation and without comment. Not even a brief discussion where she says that she's regarding it as worth it, or is wondering about going back to work at some point... gah. That's harsh. Also, if she is the Mrs Strange of Inspector Morse? That isn't going to be a very happy marriage. :( So we're left I think hoping that they'll divorce, and that Joan will go back to social work one day, and perhaps go and find her family.

And Fred. Oh Gods, Fred. I mean, I have made so many posts about him on here. ;-) The thing is: with the context provided in series 9, him committing manslaughter (not murder! not under English/Welsh law! and he might even have a decent case for self-(and other) defense!) and perverting the course of justice (yeah okay that he definitely is guilty of) in order to save Sam... it makes sense. He has had his moments of violence, and I think it's crucial to not forget that he's killed two people to save Morse in the past. Which... is part of what frustrates me, because it feels like the narrative in 9.3 is that we should treat Fred killing to save Sam as somehow less morally okay than him killing to save Morse. Which is the kind of protagonist-centered morality (or indeed police-centered morality?) that the morseverse generally avoids, and I Do Not Like It.

But the precise circumstances that series 9 creates in order to make it convincing for Fred to a) do that, b) cover it up, c) snap that badly at Morse, d) try to justify what he's done to Morse... they were extreme. It takes one of the most intense piles of trauma laid on one character in one 3-episode season of anything I think I've ever seen. Fred is going through so much, he's so broken, he's so burnt out. And I mean... of course! It took all of that to make him make those mistakes! But in retrospect... if you need to set up that intense a situation in order to make a character fuck up enough to further the plot line of another character... yeah. Hence my comment about fridging his arc. The point of Morse and Fred's relationship until series 9 has always been that even though they are both very flawed and very fallible, their love for each other is a good and awesome thing (series 7 I think really brings that home <3 ). It feels to me that 9.3 makes the whole of the rest of the show less moving and good, and that's... oh that's sad. So sad. :( I mean, I'm very biased, the Morse & Fred relationship has always been my favourite thing about Endeavour! But if the ultimate message is "Morse should never have loved Fred that much, however kind Fred was and however often he saved Morse's life"... oh that's just... it makes the whole thing so much thinner. This is, apart from anything else, a man who explicitly puts his marriage at risk when his son is missing in order to save Morse at the end of s8! But now we're supposed to see everything a tragedy because Morse has to accept that he isn't that important to Fred and never has been because during a really intense few months he's not been Fred's number 1 priority and... gaaaah.

This is terribly rambly; I'm really not as articulate today as I should like. Apologies!

The thing is: I've been fighting actually-being-a-bit-disappointed-in-series 9 for months, but now I'm going "no actually they failed" I can be a bit more generous. :)

Because...

The Good Stuff:

a) Bright's arc is fantastic. 100/10, no criticisms. <3 Probably the only one I'm fully happy about but I am very happy about it.

b) There is not a split-second in the whole of series 9 (the whole of Endeavour in fact) in which the acting is other than superb, especially from the main cast. That farewell scene between Morse and Thursday? Fucking hell. I mean, Roger Allam is my favourite actor, he never disappoints, but he still astounded me! And Shaun was also just magnificent. <3 And why hasn't Anton Lesser played Prospero yet; his delivery of the speech was incredible! Also fucking hell Caroline O'Neill is an unsung hero of the whole show.

c) To do the Fred arc justice: Fred's morality wasn't thrown away over nothing. I do feel that the trauma-conga-line-to-enable-Fred-to-let-Morse-down-sufficiently bordered at least on the contrived and unkind, but my Gods it would have been so much worse if it wasn't there! <3

d) So much nuance. I mean the fact that a lot of us cheerfully disagree with each other over how forgiving or otherwise Morse was feeling towards Fred? Is based on microexpressions, and call-backs, and how much we can read into the layering of Fred's image over the reference to Lazarus "born a pauper" in the "In Paradisum" of the Faure Requiem, and what sounds like was more than one filmed version of the farewell scene. I mean, my Gods. Endeavour has always respected the intelligence of the viewer, but that was something else.

e) The nitty-gritty of the dialogue never stopped being wonderful. Some absolutely incredible lines, literary references, layered scenes... I know I talk about James Bradshaw and Jack Laskey being underused, but the lines that each of Max and Jakes got while actually onscreen? Phenomenal. Ditto Abigail Thaw/Dorothea, on all counts.

f) The cinematography bloody hell. <3 <3 <3 And the music! Aaah!

The failures of series 9 I see are in pacing, and in making flawed decisions that don't serve the characterisation. They aren't, not once, about the quality of filmmaking being anything other than fantastic. <3 Or the storyline being other than extremely ambitious. There's nothing lazy or cheap or shock-tactics-for-the-sake-of-shock-tactics or (grr) prioritising being unpredictable over being good. It's all earnest and loving and beautifully-realised.

So many times when a show ends disappointingly (or a show's current main actor's final series ending disappointingly *cough*Shetland*cough*) it's down to lack of care and attention and love. I can't possibly accuse Russell Lewis or anyone involved in Endeavour of that. <3

I just... I just wish, so much, that they'd made different choices for the Thursdays. But at least we still have fanfic. :-)

(Also, full love to those of you who disagree with me on part or all of this! I love that this is a fandom where we can agree to disagree, and avoid much in the way of ship wars/character wars etc.. <3 Long may it continue!)

[rajanilefreak]

villainess writing prompt

So I found myself thinking on all of those villainess stories going around the other day. And while the existing concepts are amusing as fuk I was wondering what would be an idea that hasn't been used yet and got an idea to start off with.

at the most, the people who get isekai-ed to a villainess Au go up to two but never three or more and usually the villainess one has the knowledge of the otome game it's based on. So I was thinking... three people get brought in:

one of them is a mega fan of the otome game and immediately recognizes it... but unluckily they get cast as a background character that they only recognizes because they are that big of a fan. let's call them BGC for now.

one of them knows the game somewhat, enough to have some characters they like. they get cast as the main character and are incredibly thankful for it because now they know some of the options they have in front of them so they are less likely to misstep in a way that gets them killed/exiled/expelled (depending on what sort of otome it is). let's call them MC.

one of them knows nothing of the game, probably had a rather dull or miserable life and thinks they just got isekai-ed to some sort of fantasy world (if it has magic and other races and all of that) and is unaware they're the villainess. let's call them V.

Imagine all the shenanigans that this could lead to!!

BGC is now determined to befriend the MC at all costs just to lead them away from their favorite love interest. they'll, of course, help MC with any of the other available love interests, so long as that specific one stays free. Then BGC will try very hard at winning them over for themself. (don't care if BGC succeeds in getting their man or not, maybe they do or maybe they end up falling for another along the way instead of their 'one true love'. but this is mostly meant to be a softer AU so they get their happy ending all the same)

MC doesn't care much about the getting together and marriage part. they mostly see it as the price to pay if they are to survive since it's the easiest way to go about it but their heart isn't really on it. they do find BGC's attempts at befriending them a bit weird since they don't remember that character at all but chalk it up to them just not knowing enough about the game. Honestly, they would be satisfied if they got a normal job that got them enough money to live happily and not have to deal with heavy handed politics and all that jazz. (once again I don't have a defined path for them to take. maybe they do eventually fall in love with one of the romantic interests and get married, or maybe they do away with all of them and instead get a very successful business, we stan a aro queen in the house. again, so long as they are happy with their life by the end I'm good with it) V thinks they got isekai-ed into mayeby a fantasy adventure world and is just having a blast exploring the different culture. At most they're annoyed at any societal constrictions they might have due to their character's background since villainesses are more often than not ladies of high standing, usually engaged to one of the love interests, usually the prince. Honestly they barely pay attention to any of that beyond said annoyance when they get barred from doing something they want or expressing gratefulness that their stature allows them to do some things they otherwise wouldn't be able to. They also completely befuddle MC and BGC since they act nothing like what the character was supposed to. BGC is conflicted, thinking that somewhere along the line they must have altered the story in their rush to befriend MC that meant that V now lost all her bitterness and that might make things more complicated because BGC would feel bad if MC decided to go for V's fiancé. MC is just thinking that they didn't know the game very well and now considered it to be a shit game if it meant turning this person into an enemy when they didn't deserve the bad things that would happen to them and is resolved to avoid that happening. V is just happy that they now have two dedicated friends they can talk lore with. (again, don't care if they get with the prince or have they engagement broken off and get together with someone else or even neither option, but they are going to enjoy every second of exploring this new world as some sort of adventurer). So this is my idea. I tried refering to the characters by gender neutral terms (despite my tendency to refer to them in the female because most stories have them as being female) because I don't care what genders them have (heck take the chance to make one of them transfem and be thrilled that them waking up in this world means they get to have their real gender and no dysphoria. I'm always up for that).

I'm also up for this to be used as an AU of an existing fandom (even if I don't know the fandom, I think I would read the fuk out of it if it got written all the same.)

So, if anyone takes this on, just send me links so that I read it later.

[ravenwitch45]

I don't know if I'm overthinking about it, but: (warning, english isn't my first language)

I saw the Helluva Boss S2E1 several times already, and started thinking aboute this quote from Stolas. "You have no idea how long I craved this kind of passion, and how much it means that the one who wants me is my first ever friend."

At first, I just found it a little pitiful (not in the degrading sense), but then I thought of some conext we were given and some details.

1) Stolas probably though he was not desirable on sexual aspects, as we saw his own wife insult him both in private and in public, both having normalized this. Stolas teases Blitzø, but he didn't really expect a reaction from it, as if he wasn't able to cause one.

2) He said "friend", which even if it's hell, seems strange to say to someone not only you haven't seen en several years, but also are about to have sex with. He could simply said "you" or "crush" (as we saw how shameless/bold Stolas is when Blitzø is involved), but instead he wanted to expresses that the most important thing about that moment was that it was someone with a bond of mutual affection (literal friend definition).

I started hearing the line as "You have no idea how much I wanted to feel atractive/desirable, and how much it means that the one who makes me feel this way, that the one who wants me, actually cares about me".

It hit me hard.

No I don't think your overthinking it at all, we literally hear Stella insult his skills in bed so straight out insulting his desirableness seems very in character, and Stolas's mood immediately changes once Blitzo shows up, and as for the aftermath of their first night, just look at the difference

He goes from miserable to ecstatic and happy. Being intimate with Blitzo did that, It makes his heart soar to share that with someone he cares about, and that he knows cares about him.

After sessions with Blitzo we can see how he happy he is, he's giggly, smiling and playful. The interpretations of Stolas as a creepy obcessed pervert ignore that it's obvious that it isn't just the physical aspect he enjoys, it's the emotional and meaning of that matters it to him a lot too. That first night pushed off the idea that he wasn't desirable, that he didn't deserve to love someone like that.

It isn't the idea that a hot imp finds it worth having sex with him. It's the idea that Blitzo does. His old friend, probably the only person from his childhood that treated him like a person instead of an asset. It means the world to him.

There's a reason that sex is also called making love, that's because it is sometimes. Stolas once thought Love was fun cause it was, cause it was with Blitzo. And seeing that love as returned after years trapped with Stella could not make him any happier.

These two break my heart good lord, sorry I need get back to wholesome fic writing immediately. Loved doing this ask btw, it was nice to examine their relationship like this.