#anti text stutter

[thetetrisco]

I would like to remind people that I am:

— PRO RECOVERY.

— PRO GOOD FAITH.

— PRO CONSENT (NO MEANS NO).

— PRO PALESTINE

— BELIEVE NUMBER NAMES SHOULD NOT BE TREATED LIKE CLOSED CULTURES AND THUS ARE NOT OEA SPECIFIC (AND AGAINST NUMBER STRAINS IF YOU HAVE NOT EXPERIENCED OEA, THAT IS WEIRD).

— ANTI ENDOGENIC / NON-TRAUMAGENIC.

— ANTI PROSHIP

— ANTI DDLG

— ANTI RADICAL QUEER.

— ANTI “IRL”.

— ANTI “DOUBLES”.

— ANTI GENOCIDE.

— ANTI TRANS-ID’S.

— ANTI ALTER RACE.

— ANTI CREATOR DRAMA.

— ANTI TEXT-STUTTER (BECAUSE IT MOCKS SPEECH IMPEDIMENTS).

— ANTI TEXT-RHOTICITY (BECAUSE IT MOCKS SPEECH IMPEDIMENTS).

— AGAINST PREDATOR PRIVACY (AS PRIVACY GIVES THEM MORE VICTIMS).

[abyss-boxes]

Hello, hope you're having a good day!

Um, sorry for any awkwardness. We're very anxious and struggle with text.

Was wondering if you have the spare energy for a purple userbox with the text "this user struggles with text, pls be patient" or "this user stutters in text, pls be patient" ?

It's okay if not! No pressure to do this. Just wanted to ask. Um. Yeah.

Thank you and take care!

{ 👁️🪻🪽 }

[TEXT ID 1:”This user struggles with text, please be patient”]

[TEXT ID 2:”This user stutters in text, please be patient”]

No need to apologise!! Thank you for the ask anon, and i hope these help!!

Request for { 👁️🪻🪽 } anon

REBLOGS OVER LIKES

Credit appreciated but not required !!

[seungfl0wer]

*𝑶𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝑴𝒆*

Pairing: Jeongin x Reader (Fem)

Genre: Smut (Short One Shot)

Warnings: Corruption, Virgin!Jeongin, Oral(Both), Multiple: Rounds, Orgasms, Creampies, Unprotected sex, Slight degrading, public, hair pulling, I think that’s all? Sorry for any mistakes or missing warnings!

A/N: This is my first time attempt at a corruption kink so I hope I did it justice! This came out way longer than I anticipated and I wrote it over two days so I’m sorry if it’s kinda weird? Idk man lol. I hope you enjoy it!

Find Request Here

-🖤

Jeongin was known as the shy guy in class. You had never seen him talking to anymore, he always just kept his head in his books. You always wondered to yourself if he lived a double life or something because he was way too handsome to be this anti social kinda guy. As class went on you had to pick partners for a project so you made the choice to ask him to your partner.

When you walked up to him his eyes blinked at you in almost confusion. “Jeongin wanna be my partner?” You asked with a smile.

His eyes blinked quickly then down at his desk to avoid your gaze “I- uhm- s-sure” he managed to stutter out.

“Awesome! Here’s my number! Let’s meet up and talk about the project later yeah?” You smiled writing down your number on his paper. You flashed him that sweet smile one last time before walking back to your seat.

Jeongin breathed out like he was holding his breath. His face beat red not knowing what just happened. You were one of the most beautiful people to him. You were smart, kind and just stunning. He thought the world was just playing some jokes on him to have you come over to him. As he stared down at your number he felt a lump in his throat swallowing hard, he got his phone out putting your number in.

Jeongin: Are you positive you wanna be my partner?

He texted feeling regret after sending it. You smiled to yourself seeing it pop up.

You: Duh, you wanna meet at the library later? How’s 5 sound?

Jeongin: Sounds good.

Jeongin was screaming inside, he was so nervous. He’s never really talked to many girls only ever having one relationship ever when he was a teenager. He’s only ever had one singular peck on the lips so having you want to be his partner kinda made him feel proud almost.

When 5 came you were sitting in the corner of the library, the collage had comfy sides so you could relax and work. You sat on a beanbag chair almost curled up just waiting for him to come. When you saw him walk in you smiled waving him over to where you were sitting. His eyes didn’t meet your gaze looking everywhere else but you.

“Hey! You ready to start” you asked.

“Y-yeah uhm so what uhm did you want to do it on?” He asked back.

“Well from the topics why don’t we do it on gaming soundtracks?” You said looking at your paper.

The class you both were in was music production. Funny enough you both were in a lot of the same classes because you both were looking for a future in some sort of music field.

His head perked up at the thought of it. “Wait you wanna do video game stuff?” He asked almost dumbfounded.

“Yeah! I think it would be fun, I actually enjoy gaming a lot” you said with that oh so sweet smile.

He felt his heart do flips, he started asking about your favorite games, what console you used etc. You’ve never seen him so excited or talk so much for that matter. You happily answered all his questions each one making his heart just melt even more. I guess he can add gamer to the list of things he found attractive about you.

As you both started to talk about the project you moved closer to him. Your leg brushing against his. He felt a jolt go up his back his body stiffening. You were so close to him he could smell your perfume. “Hey, the library is gonna be closing soon you wanna come back to my apartment and keep working? I can order us some food.” You said before getting an excited “I can show you my gaming set up!” You said with a bright smile. He nodded feeling a bit excited as well to see your set up.

You got back to your place throwing your stuff down at the coffee table. “Make yourself at home” you said. Your apartment was small but it was cozy, it was a little messy with papers cluttering places. “Sorry for the mess” you said feeling a bit embarrassed. “Oh oh!” You said taking jeongin hand “let me show you my set up!” You said dragging him down the hall to your bedroom. His eyes widened as he walked in feeling like he shouldn’t be in here.

His attention was on your set up now though “No way! It looks awesome!” He said with a wide smile. He started geeking out over your equipment and how nice your color scheme was. You both almost completely forgot about doing the project sitting at your desk and just talking about gaming.

“You wanna test it?” You asked moving from the chair.

“Definitely” he said with a smile.

You pulled up all your games letting him pick whatever. When he started to struggle a bit with the controls you moved him a bit sitting on his lap. “Here let me change them for you so it easier” you said. His mind was blank. Every thought he might have had gone. Here you were sitting on his lap like it was nothing. He felt a breath get caught in his throat his hands not knowing where to sit.

You really didn’t do it for any other reason to help him until you felt his cock starting to poke at you. You smirked to yourself ‘this would be fun’. You moved your ass back against him a bit testing his reaction. He bit his lip feeling a groan dare to escape. This sweet innocent man didn’t know what to do. He had his eyes shut tightly hands gripping at the arm rest. Oh was it so hot to know how you were driving him crazy without even doing anything. In that moment you knew you wanted to corrupt him. To make him only be able to think of you. To only have one thought behind those beautiful eyes, you.

“Jeongin’ie are you alright?” You asked in a sickeningly sweet tone.

“Mhm” he said not being able to get anything else out.

You bit your lip moving your ass more against his now fully hard cock. You could feel his body twitching under you. He didn’t want you to move away but he didn’t think he’d be able to stop himself from cumming in his pants either. You turned your head only to be graced with the sight of him. His face was red, eyes glazed over his lip a bit swollen from him biting on it. “I can help you with that you know” you said with a grin.

His eyes just blinked at you not knowing how to reply. “Want me to make you feel good Innie?” You asked. He only nodded a little making you tilt your head. “Tell me, use your words” you said.

“I- please m-make me feel g-good” he stuttered out.

“Such a good boy” you said before moving off of him. You knelt down between his thighs pulling down his pants and boxers slightly enough to let his cock spring out. His fists were gripping the chair hard, eyes closed tightly shut.

You took his cock in your hand making him let out a soft moan at the contact. You smiled before licking up his cock rewarding you with another sweet moan. “Look at me innie” you said. His eyes slowly opening, the sight he had made his cock twitch in your grasp. While he still had his eyes on you, you quickly took him in your mouth. Slowly moving yourself over him eyes glued to his. He let out such a desperate moan as he watched you. You bobbed your head trying to keep a slower pace, your tongue swirling around his length.

“Ah- y-y/n” he moaned. His hands came up to grip your head however they just hovered over it. Scared to do something that would make you stop.

“Innie do what you feel comfortable doing” you said before reaching yourself to him.

His hands found their way to your head softly holding onto it like he’d brake you or something. He bucked his hips up into your mouth eyes fluttering at the feeling. “C-can’t I’m-“ he whined bucking his hips one more time before cumming hard back your throat. A long guttural moan left his lips as his body shook. You pulled away licking your lips eyes still glued to him.

“Didn’t think a sweet guy like you would fuck my face so well” you said with a smirk.

He was panting trying to catch his breath, when he looked down at you again his cock twitched. Your lips were swollen, eyes a bit teary and glassed over. When you stood up he watched you intently “wait- what uhm what about you?” He asked softly.

“What about me?” You said.

“I- uhm- do you want me to- h-help you?” He stuttered out.

“You wanna help me hm?” You smirked.

He nodded his eyes looking like a puppy trying to beg. “Alright come here” you said bringing him to your bed. You laid down pulling your pants down with your panties. Jeongins mouth dropped at the sight of you. He’s only ever seen a naked women through online videos it was even more jaw dropping that it was you who he was looking at. You gave him a small lesson on where to touch a girl and where it’ll make her feel good. He nodded taking in all your words like it was a class.

When he kneeled down between your legs looking up at you he felt his legs shake. He slowly leaned into you licking slowly up your folds as a test. Your words swirled in his head of what to do and as the good student he was he listened. He took your clit in his mouth sucking softly when he heard you moan he groaned back. You could see he was moving his hips against the bed trying to create some friction for himself. “Gonna be a good boy and make me cum innie?” You said with a sweet honey voice.

There it was that word again ‘good boy’ it was making his head all foggy. He wanted to be your good boy wanted to make you feel as good as you made him feel. He brought his long pretty hand up to your cunt slowly pushing a finger into you. The warmth that engulfed him made his cock somehow even harder. The taste of you was driving him even crazier. He lapped at your cunt like some dog pushing his fingers in and out of you. “Just like that, you’re doing so well- ah-“ you moaned out.

His eyes rolled back it was like some light bulb went off in his head he started to move his fingers faster curling them inside you. His lips sucked and nibbled at your nub. He wasn’t ready for what was about to happen though, your legs clamping around his head as loud moans left your mouth. “Shit- innie- I’m- fuck- cumming!” You moaned grabbing onto his hair moving your hips against his mouth as you chased your high.

You moaned out tasting every thing you gave him, he licked you clean. He moaned out loudly only to be muffled by your thighs. He bucked his hips again cumming in his pants. He looked up at you with those same almost puppy eyes, you smiled at him “you did good innie, such a good boy” you said pulling him up to you. You kissed his forehead softly holding him tightly to you.

—

The next couple days were a bit busy for the both of you only seeing one another in class while exams were going on. You two sat back in the back in class going over your project. Your hand resting on his thigh. A grin grew across your face feeling his cock already getting hard. You looked around knowing no one was even paying attention. Your hand brushed over his cock making him jump. You leaned into him a little before whispering into his ear “you’ve been working so hard, let me make you feel good hmm? Just gotta be a good boy and stay quiet, can you do that for me?” You asked.

He nodded, your hand dipped into his sweats slowly stroking him. He gripped onto the desk hard knuckles turning white. You kept your eyes on the paper asking him questions about it. He tried his best to answer it all coming out as a mumbled mess. Your fingers pressed against his tip hand speeding up. You could feel his cock twitch in your hand knowing he was already so close. “Tell me when you’re close hm?” You said softly. He nodded once more biting his lip harder.

Your hand gripped around him moving up and down faster than slower paying extra attention to his leaking tip. “Y/n-“ he said softly hand coming down to your wrist. You looked around once more before leaning your head down. His eyes went wide when he felt your mouth around his cock. Hand came to the back of your head pushing you the whole way down his length. His cum shot back your throat, you could feel his legs shaking from his orgasm.

When you finally pulled away licking your lips you smiled at his dazed over eyes. “Such a good boy, you did so so well” you said. He smiled at your words leaning into you more. He wanted nothing more than to cuddle up against you like last time.

Another day went by when you got a surprising text from him.

Him: Y/n are you busy?

You: No why what’s up?

Him: I uhm can you help me?

You: were you at?

Him: In the bathroom by room 235

You didn’t text back already on your way down to him. You smirked to yourself that he was reaching out for help. When you opened the door to the bathroom you softly said his name. He peaked out from one of the stalls his eyes looking at you like some sad animal. You quickly made your way to him you could already see how hard he was. “What’s wrong innie” you asked.

“I- I couldn’t stop thinking about the other day- please I-“ he whimpered out.

“What do you want me to do for you?” You asked.

He fiddled with his shirt not looking at you “come on baby, be a good boy and use your words” you said.

“Please I can’t cum with out you-“ he choked out. “Help me- I-“

You would have made him beg more but he looked utterly pathetic already. “Ok baby I got you, let me take care of you yeah?” You said getting down on your knees. You unzipped his pants pulling them down with his boxers. He was so hard it looked like it hurt. You wasted no time wrapping your mouth around him. You swirled your tongue around his cock looking up at how wrecked he already was. You pulled away pumping him with your hand “my sweet boy has become so dirty hasn’t he?”

He shook his head “I’m- I’m not-“ you whinnied out.

“No? So you didn’t text me to come suck you off in the bathroom?”

“I- m’sorry” he whinnied more.

“Such a dirty little boy hmm? Can’t get off by yourself anymore need to- to fuck my mouth just to get off?”

He whimpered “y-yes” he said truthfully.

“Then use my mouth to get yourself off” you said wrapping your mouth back around him but not moving.

He looked down at you eyes filled with tears he grabbed at your head pushing his cock back your throat. “Y/n” he whimpered out I’m already so close” he said head falling back. He pushed in your mouth a few more times his grip holding you in place. He was fucking your mouth like a flesh light. “C-cumming!” He moaned out a familiar warm liquid shooting back your throat. When he pulled out his eyes were glued to you. “Y/n I- wanna make you feel good again please- I need to- to- t-taste you again” he begged.

“Innie wants to eat me out hmm? How bad baby tell me how much you want too” you said.

“So bad, so fucking bad please- please I’ll make you cum like a good boy” he whinnied.

“Mm such a dirty mouth you’ve gotten, let’s put it to use yeah?”

He smiled he pulled your pants and panties down hosting you up against the stall. You were taken back by his surprising strength he had. He wasted no time diving straight into you. He lapped at your folds his tongue darting into your wet cunt, His nose rubbing against your clit. You grabbed onto his hair for some stability only making him moan into your cunt. “You like when I use your face hm? I bet you like it when I pull your hair too- such a dirty boy. You’ve become such a little whore” you said dripping at his hair harder.

His mind went blank his cock twitching already so hard again. He ate you out like a starved man. Nipping at your clit before somehow letting one of his arms go. He pushed his fingers deep into you curling them perfectly. “J-just wanna make you feel good” he said. “Wanna be- be your good boy” he continued. He sucked harsher at your clit your walls tightening around his fingers.

“Shit- innie-“ you moaned out “don’t stop- fuck I’m gonna cum!” You said. He listened, he didn’t stop he in fact took a mental note of what he was doing. When you finally came you came hard against his lips body shaking against the stall wall. To your surprise he came with you, untouched for his second orgasm. He let you down stumbling back a bit. His legs felt weak his body shaking. You wrapped your arms around him kissing his cheek softly “you did so well you know that? You’re such a good boy innie” You said. Making him relax a bit. He cuddled up to you holding tightly like you would run if he didn’t.

—

Today was the day to present your project, both of you were super nervous. However it went over really well. The teacher was really impressed even more so as he listened to jeongin talk. He was happy to see him out of his shell more than ever.

When you both got the grade back smiling wide at the big A+ you got, you hugged him tightly. He was taken back a bit, you were hugging him so openly he was just surprised you didn’t care that people saw. “Innie how about we celebrate today! I’ll order something and we can celebrate at my place yeah?” You said excitedly. Of course he nodded feeling excited too. He was just happy to see you so happy.

—

When jeongin knocked on your door he was greeted with you in an oversized shirt with nothing else on. His jaw dropped at the sight of you. You hugged him again pulling him into the apartment. “I’m so proud of you!” You said. “You talked so well in-front of everyone!”

“It was- easier.. you know having you up there with me” he said shyly.

Your heart melted at his words “yeah? Well innie I got a special surprise for you!” You said pulling him into your room. There was a box sitting on the bed with his name on it. “Just a little something to tell you I’m proud of you, it was actually gonna be a birthday present but- I think you deserve it now.” You said excitedly. When he unwrapped it he almost cried, it was a new headset he showed you before. There was also another small box in it. When he pulled it out he felt his chest tighten. It was a small necklace with the first letter of your name on it.

When he looked up at you he could see a small blush peppering your face. He felt all shy again like the women of his dream didn’t just basically ask him to be hers. He smiled putting it on right away before coming to hug you. In the moment he didn’t even realize before he pressed his lips to yours. He kissed you lovingly his heart pounding in his chest.

The kiss caught you by surprise but you couldn’t help but feel yourself melting at his touch. You moved yourself walking backwards to find the bed. You kissed him one last time before pushing him to the bed. It didn’t take long for you to be onto of him again lips pressed against one another. The kiss was more hungry this time more desperate. You grinned your hips into his already hardened cock making you both moan into the kiss. You quickly pulled away ridding yourself of your shirt. His eyes went big never seeing you fully naked before. His hands quickly grabbed ahold of your chest. He rolled his hips to meet your movements making you both moan in unison.

“Innie take your pants off for me?” You asked. He quickly did so pulling them down fast. You rolled your hips against him once more his cock pressing against your cunt. You yourself couldn’t take it anymore you needed to feel him inside you. You moved your body back holding onto the shaft of his cock before slowly sinking yourself down. It almost looked like his soul was pulled from him his breathing almost stopping. The warmth of your walls was too much for him.

“You ok if I move baby?” You asked softly.

“Y-yes” he mustered up.

You moved your hips sinking down fully into him. His hands gripped at your thighs digging in harshly. Your walls were clenching so tightly around him, the sight before him was not helping his situation. He watched as your perfect breast bounced with every movement. Your face contorting in pleasure and the sweet moans that left your lips. Oh man was he a goner. “Y/n! Stop I’m gonna cum!” You almost screamed out. But you didn’t care you kept moving, faster even.

You felt his cock twitch inside you cumming deep into you. His hot cum coating every part of your insides. You didn’t even notice your own orgasm creeping up on you until you were cumming from the sensation.

There was a moment of you both breathing until you felt yourself being hoisted up and pushed back down on the bed. “I- fuck- y/n I’m sorry- please I-“ he whimpered out. His cock already rock hard again. He pushed into you once more this time moving fast. He felt the warm cum around him letting him slide in and out with ease. “T’good- can’t- can’t stop- m’sorry” he groaned. He was fucking you as if he’d done it a million times. His pace perfect hitting all your sweet spot.

“Ah- innie- you’re such a dirty boy- ah- ah- fucking me again without even asking” you teased.

“M’sorry-“ he whimpered.

“I feel that good hm?” You said.

“Fuck- yes- feel good- s’good- can- can I cum inside again? Please please I’ll be good and make you cum again too” he begged.

“Be a good boy and make me cum first” you said.

He was on a mission after that his hand coming down to play with your clit. It really backfired on him though as your cunt clenched around him so tightly. “Fuck- fuck” he moaned out before he realized he was cumming again.

“M’sorry- m’so sorry” he cried out his head coming to rest in the crook of your neck. Even after cumming twice he was still so damn hard. He rocked his hips into you so overstimulated but he needed to make you cum.

He gripped at your thighs pushing them up, he fucked into you harder pushing his cock to the hilt. “Jeongin! Your- fuck your so deep!” You moaned out.

“Your- your not mad at me for cuming again?” He asked.

“It’s ok baby, fuck- you’re still my good boy” you said softly against his ear.

He moved back looking down at you “n-no not a good boy till- till I make you cum-“ his hand came down to play with your clit once more fucking into you like he almost hated you. His movements were sloppy but rough. You felt your high at its braking point watching as he fucked into you until the necklace caught your eye. Fuck- seeing the necklace knowing he was fully yours pushed you over the edge. You came hard around his cock pulling him down to kiss you as you swallowed each others moans. He came for a third time his body shaking like crazy against yours.

As you both calmed down a bit you kissed him softly “did such a good job- always be my good boy” you said softly.

“Your good boy” he said just as softly.

“Yes, you’re my. Good boy.” You said with a smile ���if that’s ok with you? To be mine?” You asked.

“Like- like your boyfriend?” He said looking up at you with puppy eyes.

“Yes, silly” you smiled.

“of course! Yes yes! I’d love to be!” He said happily.

“Then it’s settled. You’re all mine. And you know what that means?” You asked.

“What?” He said.

“I’m all yours too!” You said making him smile even more. He kissed you softly cuddling up into you. “All mine” he said in almost a whisper before slowly falling asleep.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

💙 If you’d like to read more of my stuff you can find it Here: Master List . Thank you for reading and if requests are open or you just wanna talk feel free to send me something🩵

Taglist: @satosugu4l @do-you-remember-summer-127 @xines16 @minh0scat @troublemaker02 @tr-mha-fan @lunearta @velvetmoonlght @minghaosimp @ldysmfrst @felixleftchickennugget

[starryeyedjanai]

bad boys do it better

rated: teen | @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt: modern au tags: dating apps, innuendo, bad flirting read on ao3

✿

Eddie finally opens Tinder after downloading it in a fit of desperation.

He's tried everything but these stupid apps—bars and clubs and pottery classes and rock climbing—trying to find someone he can connect with.

But he's mostly found guys that string him along with whispered sweet nothings and half-promises they don't intend to follow through on.

So he makes his profile and then promptly fumbles and drops his phone because— no fucking way.

There's no way this is real life.

There's no fucking way the first guy to pop up is Steve fucking Harrington, his unfortunate and longest lasting crush in high school.

He picks up his phone and sees Steve's face staring back at him, unassuming, a bright, cheery smile on his face.

Steve, 28 2 miles away "Hope you like bad boys because I have it on dvd and vhs" Interests: baseball, basketball, live music, movies

He taps to get to the next photo and lets out a shaky breath—the shorts of what can only be his Halloween costume are so short, exposing hairy thighs that Eddie wants to sink his teeth into.

The next photo is a snapchat picture of him grinning wide, cradling what might be the world's ugliest dog, the text across the screen reading my nephew is so handsome 🤩🤩🤩.

The last is an obligatory shirtless mirror pic, not showing off washboard abs, but the soft, toned skin of his stomach.

He closes the app, sets his phone down, and breathes through his nose.

This can't be real, right? In what world would Steve be the first person in a sea of profiles in San Francisco of all places?

Eddie expected him to chase after Nancy Wheeler when she went to Boston, but he didn't stick around long enough in Hawkins to find out if they ever rekindled their will-they-won't-they relationship.

Maybe he's just visiting. Maybe he found his match and just forgot to delete Tinder. Because there's just no way Eddie has this kind of luck.

He opens up Instagram and searches for Steve and finds him right away because they're probably still Facebook friends.

He scrolls through his profile and deflates a little, because all of the pictures on Tinder are from his Instagram. Which means it's probably much more likely that someone is catfishing using Steve's pictures.

Because the Steve from high school wasn't into men. And he's hot enough for someone to use his pictures to scam people or whatever.

He opens up Tinder again and his thumb is swiping right before he thinks about what he's doing.

It's a match!

Okay, now he knows it's a catfish. Or maybe it's a bot.

There's no world in which Steve Harrington would swipe right on him in the twenty minutes it's been since he created his account.

He types a message to "Steve" saying so are you a bot or just a catfish?

He doesn't get a response right away, so he clicks out of the messages, looking at profiles of what are hopefully actual people he can connect with.

His phone buzzes when the message from Steve comes in.

Hi3 Eddiems, cl!ck th3 linkin my proffile to . achat I am waitin9

He rolls his eyes and goes back to perusing profiles. It's not like he thought it was really Ste-

His phone pings with another message and he clicks back into the chat immediately.

That was a joke. There's not even a link in my profile

Eddie's heart beats a little faster, his fingers typing out a response.

So a catfish then?

Why do you think I'm a catfish?????

Because I know the guy in those pictures and there's no way hes into men. That guy was a jock extraordinaire in high school and very straight

You're awfully judgey for someone who was so anti-conformity in high school. Whos to say I haven't changed?

Or like, learned new things about myself?

Eddie's breath stutters in his throat.

Also you didn't really know me since we never talked.

Okay, I mean. It's pretty easy to guess that I was counterculture in high school by looking at me. So I'm still on the fence about the catfish thing

How about we meet up then? So you can see me in all my nearing-30 glory

And watch bad boys on dvd and vhs with you?

Dude, I am not inviting you to my house on the first date

That's a third date kind of thing

Oh yeah? Is it a back-to-back feature? We start with the vhs then move to dvd?

He can't believe he's entertaining this. A catfish wouldn't offer to meet up unless they thought Eddie wouldn't call their bluff. He kind of wants to see where this is going.

No see, we start with the dvd playing in the living room and then when we inevitably start being bad boys🥵 in the middle of the movie, we can pick it back up on vhs in my room later

To be clear, we stop the movie, right? I'm not sure bad boys has a soundtrack meant for the kind of activities we'd be doing

Oh for sure. I'd even put on my "let's get it on" playlist. As a treat.

Eddie can't help but grin. Even if this guy is a catfish, this is maybe the most fun he's had talking to someone in a long time.

Are you serious about meeting up?

Uh yeah, I can't have you thinking I'm a catfish forever

What's your favorite brewery?

Cellarmaker

Wanna do tomorrow afternoon at like 2 when it's not busy?

That sounds perfect

He isn't sure if it's really Steve or if he's going to be met with someone else or stood up, but at least he'll get to drown his sorrows if it doesn't work out.

Well—he's unsure until he gets the 'stharrington started following you' notification on Instagram a few minutes later.

He screams into his pillow so loud his neighbor thumps on the wall.

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Ok omggg so I know Vigilante is DC and Deadpool is Marvel, but just imagine Deadpool’s daughter dating Vigilante 🫣

STOP THATSS DUCKING PERFECT. R U SERIOUS RN?

i wanted to write something abt this so here’s a lil Drabble thing

Adrian held his hand out, nervous smile on his face. Wade looked the boy up and down, before extending this hand out, hesitantly.

“Dad, this is my boyfriend, Adrian. Adrian, this is… my dad.” You introduced, watching the way your dad narrowed his eyes at the boy.

Adrian had no clue your dad was Deadpool at first, and Wade had no clue you were dating vigilante, the very person he called “cool” the other day.

You knew both of their identities, but decided to keep it to yourself, knowing they would probably find out sooner or later. you were right.

Adrian was staying the night, and your dad had been out all day, and knowing him, you knew why. You had texted him multiple times, letting him know Adrian was there with you, but it seems as if he hadn’t seen the messages, because he walked in, suit still on, sipping down a milkshake as he shouted your name.

He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw not you, but Adrian staring right at him, water overflowing his cup as he stared with his jaw dropped at the side of your dad- Deadpool, dripping in blood in your kitchen with his mask off.

“You’re getting some… water on my foor.” He pointed to the puddle forming, breaking the silence. You came out, watching the two stare at each other, your dad dragging his blood in.

You watched as your boyfriend stuttered out an apology, feeling the need to explain himself and stumble to get a towel and clean up the water, while still looking at your dad like he had two heads.

“I’m sorry- deadpo- Wa- Mr. Wilson. Are you actually….? You know?” He gestured, standing up and pointing to the suit.

Your dad glanced at you, a smile visible on your face. He turned back to Adrian once he spoke again.

“Because if you are- I- I would like you to know something.”

Your dad sighed, putting the drink on the table and nodding at the boy to continue.

“Have you ever heard of Vigilante? Like- not the word itself, but like the anti-hero dude? Mighta seem him on the news, wanted lists-“

“Yeah, I’ve heard of him.” He shrugged, face full of confusion, until it dawned on him, his mouth forming an “o” shape. “You’re… vigilante?”

He nodded with a smile on his face. “Oh my god, this is so amazing. You’re like- my idol,” he rambled, turning to face you standing in the doorway of your room. “Did you know?”

“Course I did.” You giggled with a smile. “He’s my dad.”

[sweatervest-obsessed]

Violent Delights Have Violent Ends

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!reader

WC: 1.8k

TW: Serial killers, murders, blood, referencing to infidelity,

A/N: This has been something I have been thinking about for a while. I hope y'all enjoy it!

Spencer did not realize that someone could know more about anything intellectual than he did. It honestly baffled him, when Hotch called him into the office, to introduce the two of you. 

“Spencer this is Doctor Y/N Y/L/N, Doctor Y/L/N, this is Doctor Spencer Reid.” 

He gave you a small smile, and a slightly awkward wave. You were beautiful, there was no doubt about it, an absolute plus to the fact that you were intelligent. He was captivated by your eyes but quickly coughed and looked back at Hotch. 

“Doctor Y/L/N—”

“Please Agent, call me by my first name after the initial introductions, Doctor makes me feel a tad bit ridiculous after like the second time.” You couldn’t have been more than twenty four, Reid deduced. 

Hotch smiled at you, nodding. “Please, call me Aaron, or Hotch, I feel the same way about agent. Reid,” He turned towards Reid. “Y/N, is going to be a consultant on this next case, and you two will be working closely together.”

Reid was suddenly excited by the prospect of working with a consultant. He usually dreaded them, but something about you made him excited to actually be able to converse intellectually with someone on the team. 

But luckily for Morgan, you were not what anyone was expecting. You all had boarded the jet, sitting around and chatting since you had a long flight from DC to Oregon, not really willing to get into the details of the case just yet. 

“So, Doctor Y/L/N, what made you choose Shakespeare?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Agent Morgan, if you keep using my official title, you’re going to be talking to the wall. Wanna try again?” 

His jaw dropped slightly, enjoying the banter you were providing. Derek Morgan was far from ugly, far from it. But he simply wasn’t your type. But that did not mean you couldn’t flirt back. 

“Well then, Miss Y/N, why Shakespeare.” 

You smiled, “Shakespeare is just another language. And I already speak French, Arabic, Spanish, some Latin, a little Greek, and I’m learning enough Mandarin and Cantonese to get by on my next trip to China. So understanding Shakespeare from a linguistic point, I’ve already got covered. Especially since it was something I could read easily from a young age.” 

JJ and Emily had stopped their conversation and turned to face you, eagerly listening in to what you have to say. 

“But, from a theatrical point, his writing is so incredibly intricate. There are layers upon layers of text and context and subtext throughout all of his plays and sonnets, not to mention the fact that Shakespeare can be transformed, moved from one thing to another incredibly easily. You have to factor in that he was a misogynist, anti semitic, probably-most-definitely racist, among all of the other things, but adapting his works throughout time is something I have a special interest in, particularly his portrayal of woman and how that has been changed throughout productions over the years, mainly focusing in comedies and this strange need for him to have happy endings end in weddings.”

The jet was all staring at you, while a smirk slowly slid onto Derek’s face. “Looks like you got some competition here, Pretty Boy.” 

You shrugged at Derek, and looked back at your phone. “I appreciate competition more than meaningless run-around conversations Derek. If you’re going to profile me, then just profile me. Or google me really. There’s no need to prod and pretend like you’re not trying to find out whether or not I’m single. If you wanted to ask me out, you should just ask me out.” 

Jaws on the plane dropped. Derek tried to stutter out a response but was cut off by Emily, smirking over at him. “Besides consulting on murder cases, what do you actually do with a PhD in Shakespeare?”

You looked up at Emily and shrugged. “Whatever I really want to do. It’s just flexible enough that I can bullshit a job I want and take it, excluding present company. Usually I consult in England with the Globe Theatre and the Royal Shakespeare Company, I also guest lecture Shakespeare for younger audiences, like high schoolers and first years in college because I’m still young enough that I could be considered nerdy by a high schooler, but have college freshmen not be able to talk to me because I’m just good enough to get away with it.”

“What did you get your undergrad in?” Spencer spoke for the first time to you since you met him, you smiled a little bit. 

“No one really asks me that.” You looked over at Spencer. “I have a bachelors in Directing with minors in English Literature, French, and Classics, and then I went on and got my Masters in Art History, since the visual aspect of the Arts is what interests me so much.” 

Rossi nodded, “Makes sense considering I’ve seen your thesis–very impressive.” 

“What did you write about?” JJ looked over at you. 

“I–” You started but Rossi interrupted you. “Actually, if any of you had done any research, or were familiar with the Theatrical Arts, you would know that her thesis was an incredibly well-received production of Hamlet that delved into the female psyche and experience.” 

Your jaw dropped slightly. “I-I didn’t think you, any of you would have even known that. Let alone had time to go and see my production?”

“Well, I have a fondness for the arts.” 

You shook your head. “Or incredible timing.” 

“Wha–timing?” JJ scoffed. 

“Well,it’s— the program was in London, and it was only running for a few weeks…”

“Rossi when the hell did you go to London?” Derek finally spoke up, slightly captivated by you, but not in the way Reid was. You were something else, something completely new, which meant he could learn, and you were something he wanted to learn everything about. 

“Well, right before I rejoined the BAU, I did a lecturing series over at Scotland Yard, and everyone had been discussing this production by the youngest female director to ever direct at the Bridge Theatre. I loved your use of, what were they, silks?” 

You nodded, slightly embarrassed, mostly in awe. 

“Ah yes, your usage of silks and the columns. I was on the floor, part of the cattle that was moved around. Very innovative use of that space, very impressive.” 

“I’d have to agree.” Hotch spoke up, and you turned to look at him, eyes even wider than before. He smiled at the look on your face. “When we got this case, and we were requesting you as a consultant, I watched the recording. Very good work Y/n.”

“W-wow, um, thank you so much Age–Hotch. I really appreciate it–from the both of you.” You smiled at him and Rossi. 

“I would love to hear all about this production, if you don’t mind me asking.” Emily slid across the aisle, taking the seat across from you, JJ doing the same, crowding Derek. 

“Well, as Rossi said, it was about the female experience, and my Hamlet, was absolutely incredible, really took on the queer aspect of the role since Ophelia was still a woman, and–” You explained the concept, the design, the thought behind all of it. Every single person on the plane was simply obsessed with you by the time you were done, asking questions when they were curious. It confounded Spencer how he had never really paid attention to that section of the world of academia, and he was almost beating himself up over it, because he had missed you this whole time. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------

“Eyes look your last, Arms take your—this is Romeo’s death monologue before he stabs himself. And this other one, is ‘Be buried quick with her, and so will I’, which is Hamlet trying to fight Laertes after he learns of Ophelia’s death…And..this is the one from this morning ” You turned to the sheriff who was just trying to make sense of the fact that you just were able to comprehend and relay Shakespearean information after reading the images of the victim's blood used on the walls, so calmly. “Sheriff?”

“Sorry, yes. Yes” 

You frowned a bit, “They’re getting more violent. This is Brutus finding out Portia is dead–’with meditating that she must die once, I have the patience to endure it now…”

Reid looked over at you, “All of them are the men’s reactions to the death of their beloved.” 

You nodded and sighed. “That means, uh…If he has a list,” You walked over to the white board and started writing the names of the fictional couples on it. “He still has Antony and Cleopatra…Macbeth and Lady Macbeth,,,,and….”

“And what?” The sheriff looked between you and Reid, as you turned a little white. “The um. The last couple dealing with murder/suicide of each other is, uh, Othello.”

Hotch gave you a look. “Explain.” 

“What do you know about Othello?” 

Hotch furrowed his brow.

You took his silence as permission to ramble. “It’s just a theory but, it’s regarded as not only one of the most tragic endings to lovers, even beyond the stupid miscommunications of Romeo and Juliet, because Othello kills his wife, believing she had cheated on him, suffocating her to death on their marriage bed, and then once he realizes he’s been tricked by Iago, he kills himself next to her body. It’s horrendous.”

“If I had to guess, He’s forcing the husbands to kill their wives, and then he kills them..” Spencer followed up, analyzing the pictures across the tables. “Based on the way they were positioned—he’s setting them up as a series of muder-suicides, just like Shakespeare.” 

“Actually.” You picked up one of the pictures and handed it to Hotch. “I think it’s a woman.” 

“You just stole Reid’s line.” Derek mused from the doorway, handing you a cup of coffee, which you gratefully accepted. 

Reid huffed and rolled his eyes. “It’s not my line.” 

“It is.” Hotch said dryly as he analyzed what you had just told him. “Y/n, can you please get me a list of the monologues left, so we can try and figure out who might be his next victims, so we can try and link the victims we do have.” 

You nodded and sat down at your laptop. It was bugging you slightly at how much you enjoyed working on this case, working with the BAU, working with Doctor Reid. 

This was the most action your PhD had seen since you had written it. 

Part 2

[yanderes-galore]

Could you write a concept for Loona from Helluva Boss?

Sure! Here's some thoughts about it. @okchijt helped me out :)

Yandere! Loona Concept

(FT. Platonic! Blitzø)

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Possessive behavior, Violence, Blood, Manipulation, Stalking, Kidnapping, Blitzø enables her, Forced relationship/companionship.

Loona is a hard one to read due to her personality.

She's very dismissive and anti-social.

For a major part of her obsession she'll probably be distant.

She doesn't seem interested in anything, she has very brief interactions with people.

The only people she seems to like are Blitzø, Vortex, and maybe Octavia.

Even when friends with her obsession she may appear like she doesn't want to be there...

But over time she would enjoy your presence.

Loona would be the most compatible with Hellhound obsession.

She'd also most likely meet them at Beelzebub's party or perhaps they even work at I.M.P.

She isn't very intense with her obsession for the most part.

If her crush isn't immediate, she's rather tame.

She may struggle with social situations or brush her obsession off at first.

But the Hellhound does eventually begin to like you.

For example, she does care for Blitzø even if she brushes him off at times.

Working alongside you or chatting with you enough (no doubt through text due to how often she's on her phone) might make her care for her obsession more.

Due to being a Hellhound, I can also see Loona eventually being possessive or easily jealous once she's attached.

Her obsession is slow to show itself, but it happens eventually.

Loona would start by trying to be friends with you, showing care and listening to your problems at times.

Despite her dismissive attitude, she no doubt cares for her obsession if they manage to get under her thick shell.

Loona would take a long time to show any sort of vulnerability with you, but if she does it's in private.

Once she starts showing care to her darling, she comes off as interested and protective.

She does have care for those she likes, which can be seen when she helps I.M.P protect Blitzø from the Cherubs.

An interesting characteristic to consider with Loona is her human form, too.

Which means she could even follow you into the human world in case you have a job there.

One Loona realizes she enjoys your presence, she's not only protective but possessive.

She may also stutter or appear embarrassed around her obsession when she tries to be social with you.

She really isn't the best at this kind of thing....

Loona herself is very... tame.

She's fond of her obsession but knows to give them their space.

She tends to have protective instincts and easily picks up on your distress.

She may even follow you around due to such instincts.

Anything that would make her intense is actually due to her being... helped.

While Loona is accepting of giving you space, tolerating you around others, and just suffocating her instincts enough to be protective more than possessive...

You can bet Blitzø steps in.

Blitzø no doubt notices how Loona acts with you.

Even more so if you're another Hellhound.

Blitzø loves his adopted daughter more than most things.

He notices the way her tail aways when you're near, or the way her eyes dilate when you pay attention to her.

He can just tell she's shy towards you.

Imagine if Blitzø tries to play matchmaker?

He playfully teases Loona while also encouraging you to be closer.

He won't mind you two together... as long as you don't break her heart.

Loona often brushes the imp off, telling her dad to lay off while profusely texting apologies to you for his behavior.

She doesn't want Blitzø embarrassing her.

Honestly she'd rather die than go through that.

However, Blitzø would probably be the one to encourage Loona during her obsession.

He already acts like you're part of his family, always casual with you and bringing up Loona.

It's like he's using subtle manipulation to get you two together.

He says you two would be perfect, all while Loona is wishing he would piss off.

Although, there's some things she's thankful for.

For example, Blitzø keeps a careful eye on you when Loona can't.

While Loona is fully capable of protecting you, having Blitzø help is a game changer.

Blitzø would probably already talk about where you'd stay if Loona brought you to his apartment.

He lays down ground rules if Loona has you over, being the overprotective dad with her.

All while Loona feels this is a bit too fast...

But thinking of you... she isn't entirely against it.

Blitzø coos over Loona being around you.

His little girl... getting a partner of her own....

Luckily Loona spares you from him at times, often keeping you away from him.

Although... I imagine you'd end up at the apartment in some way near the peak of Loona's obsession.

Loona gets downright feral at the idea of you being hurt.

Biting, scratching, spilling blood...

It's nothing new for a Hellhound, especially an assassin.

Blitzø may try to say to Loona that her possessive instincts are normal.

She likes you, right?

Perhaps even more than that?

Then why not be a bit more... up-front with courting.

Honestly, if Loona allowed it, any "kidnapping" or isolation would be due to Blitzø helping Loona.

The two, mostly Blitzø, would manipulate you into the position.

Blitzø is already considering you his kid-in-law.

Meanwhile Loona is trying to calm you down, telling you she won't rush you....

Her dad's just... excited.

Yet she doesn't prevent things, either.

She tries to make you feel at home, she tries to show she cares.

She struggles with being affectionate but learns over time.

When you're eventually "moved in" to the apartment, you most likely rest in Loona's room.

You're given some freedom, as long as either Loona or Blitzø is watching you roam.

Blitzø is cautious you don't leave the apartment once you're in it.

He doesn't want you hurting Loona, often rambling with pride that his family is growing.

If you did try to escape, Blitzø may suggest cuffing you to Loona.

At the apartment you're cuffed to some furniture.

At the I.M.P HQ you're kept cuffed in a backroom.

Loona may be awkward as she isn't the most intense yandere herself.

She's apologetic for everything, all while Blitzø is praising her and trying to encourage her obsession to do the same.

Loona may feel guilty for the life her obsession now has to endure.

When you two are one on one, she tries to encourage you in your new life.

She knows she shouldn't do this... that you should be set free... but...

She... doesn't want you to leave now, actually–

Admittedly... She likes keeping you at the apartment.

She likes "dating" you.

She likes working with you.

Her father just wants to help...

For once she'll take this gift.

[cirqosmos]

FIVE KITTENS + ONE = CAN I BE YOUR KITTEN TOO?

2023 | 13+ | ONESHOT | YANG JUNGWON × READER

SUMMARY as a lifelong and dedicated anti-kitten, you didn't expect that looking after your older sister's cat shop was a downright bliss—but shock is an underestimation when a human incarnation of a kitten appeared before you, slowly blinking at you with it's boba eyes.

AUTHOR'S NOTE cough cough.. the amount of 'kitten' titles in my jw oneshots 😗 also a celebration for 1000+ followers! :D

cats. kittens. endless purring. being smothered with adorableness was beyond your limit to function properly. okay, you take back your words that you hate kittens. you love them, you absolutely love them.

how can someone blame you for initially despising kittens though? when you've seen nothing but wicked kittens glaring at you down and hissing with their creepy arching back, you swore that was a tight stare down as you tried to escape it's wrath.

but how horrendous it is that your sister had been gatekeeping you from her heavenly kittens (not really), you had a week off from your devil of a boss and got to visit your sister after awhile.

unfortunately, she had matters to settle for two weeks and had to travel to another state which is miles away and had asked for you to look after her cat shop. being the anti-kitten you are, you smashed her request with a humongous imaginary hammer.

but it's safe to say that you've been bribed by a ticket to your favourite kpop idol's concert, immediately falling on your knees and praying enormously to your older sister's smug looking statue.

goosebumps initially riled over your arms, neck, legs, let's just say your entire soul when you pushed open the shop's screen door. you expected the vile creatures inside to immediately hiss and devour you but to your utter shock, they smothered you with kisses!

so here you are now, on your fifth day of nothing but utter bliss with your babies. thumbing through the pages of the magazine you took under the shelf after feeding the kittens, some of them finished early much to your amusement and quickly went to your side. oh what kind of merits have you done in your previous life to receive such adorableness?

contented, you fell into deep slumber with the kittens on your lap.

the bell rang, signifying a person's arrival—your ears failed to catch the sound of the footsteps as you were deep in your dreamland of hopping along on the puffy clouds with the kittens

"hm?" the person putted his palms on his knees as he lowers himself a tad bit to gain a closer look to your face. fixing his posture back, he roamed around the shop—sticking his finger in the cages as he cooed at the purring kittens.

humming to himself as he took a seat on one of the chairs, taking his time as he thumbed through his social media, and reading his groupchat's texts—replying back before his reflected boba eyes lifted on your slumber form, his eyelashes fluttered as he slowly blinks at you.

your eyes shot wide open for no particular reason, groaning as you fell asleep for more than you need. your head throbbing as you clasped it, looking around for your kittens until your sleepy eyes fell on—huh—you rubbed your eyes and squinted hard at the humongous cat before you, why the heck is it so big and tall? and why does it have a hoodie on with pants, cats aren't suppose to wear one, don't they?

"hi."

d-did it just say hi to you? the realisation sank into your sleeping soul as you screamed at the humongous kitten sitting on the chair across you. "fuck! why are you so big!" the rest of the kittens on your lap flew to the air, surprised by your sudden raise of voice.

the humongous kitten's boba eyes ogled at your chosen words, frozen at the spot as it stuttered terribly.

wait?! did you accidentally feed one of your kittens way too much? holy shit—what are you supposed to do now? did you just raise a titan that would devour the entire world? oh my god—oh wait— it isn't a... cat tho?

oh. it's a boy. not a kitten. oh shit, how seriously embarrassing is this?! stuttering in a low tone. "uh, welcome. is there anything i can help you with?"

an awkward silence engulfed the room before the boy burst out into an adorable giggle, his cheeks growing like a puffing steamed bun as he raised his fist up to his lips. his boba eyes crinkling into glowing crescents which had you screaming in your mind—holy shit, why there's a cute guy here?!

"you must have a really nice dream to think that i was a kitten." his voice laced with giggles shoot Cupid's arrow to your rampant heart.

"u-uh, i don't know?" you pressed your lips tight awkwardly.

"i thought you said you hate kittens though?"

your eyes widened in pure shock, with your fangirling mode switching into ultra protection mode. "huh, how did you know! wait, are you a stalker?!"

"woah, woah. chill, a bit? i got to hear it from your sister, she told me—"

"wait you know my sister?"

"yeah, i'm her friend. and she called me awhile ago if i could check on you for some reasons."

your eyes sparkled upon the quick speed of your realisation, clasping your hands together as you reminisce the glowing aura of your sister. "was she worried about my me?"

"no. she was worried you're going to bury the kittens."

"ugh, never mind." you rolled your eyes before the shattered holy image of your sister, internally screaming at her for doubting your clean-ass reputation. your neck grew goosebumps when you realise the boy still had his boba orbs fixated on you.

"w-what you looking at?" your eyes darted all around the space before swaying your hand before the bot. "shoo shoo!"

he burst into another giggle once again, amused. "seriously, you're still treating me like a kitten. for your information, the proper name is mr. yang. kindly call me that, instead of shoo shoo, will ya?"

"okay, mr. yang! how long did my sister exactly ask for you to be here?" you frowned, "i assume that checking on me means going after two minutes of being here, so what are you still doing here?"

"ouch, getting rid of me so quick?"

"if that's what you'd like to hear, then yes."

"god." his low voice gave goosebumps to you for the nth time. "give me a break, i just got back from work. tired, you know?" jungwon stood up, and the kittens on the floor grabbed onto his pants—climbing utterly fast till his hips. "plus the kittens seems to like me, don't you think?"

"i had no idea what my sister fed them to the point they're unbelievably comfy with people, actually. So don't get too high on yourself." nonchalantly replying you did as you observe the kittens, or maybe him.

"nah, the kittens surely likes me." his eyelashes fluttered up along his boba eyes to look at you. "but how about you?" mischievous smirk adorning his soft pink lips along with his boba eyes gazing deep into your soul. w-what the heck is he pulling with such good freaking looks?!

"u-uh?"

"i was asking if you like me too," jungwon lifted the kitten, pressing a gentle kiss on its head with his eyes still on you. "cause you've been blushing for quite awhile now."

"ha! that was the heat, you got really some awful tendencies to flirt with people you just met huh?" you scoffed as you brushed the kittens back with the hairbrush. "just like these little fellas."

"however.. cats don't ease up easily to people they don't particularly like." jungwon pouted in a playful manner, carrying the kittens in his arms as he slowly approached you. "cats also know very well who they want."

your cheeks flushed into an utter mess, looking away from his once adorable boba eyes that held the melody of a siren. he stopped before your sitting form, lowering himself down as he slowly placed the purring kitten on your lap.

"i don't know your name yet, mind telling me?"

"we're not friends, why would i?"

he pouted immensely, as he patted the kitten on your lap. "how cruel, well then. can i be your friend?"

"no thanks."

smirking he did as he gestured his index finger at the kittens. "then.. one, two— three, four—"

"counting for what?" you raise your eyebrow suspiciously. "if you're thinking to steal them, then scrap the idea."

"five." he hummed in utter delightment, "i'm actually counting how many kittens you had on your lap right now."

you had no idea what this cat-like boy were up to, that mischievous smirk never leaving his lips had you feeling so many things.

placing his chin on his palms, "ah. since you don't want me to be your friend, then.. since there's five kittens here, I wonder if i can be your kitten too?"

your cheeks heated up with his choice of words, your mind scrambled over whether he had gone insane. "w-what are you—"

whatever you're about to say though had gone to ashes, as you caught onto his boba eyes slowly blinking at you, his cheeks blooming into pink shade as his lips pulling up into another mischievous smirk. "the name's jungwon just so you have a name to call whenever you want me."

「 © talesofyuan on tumblr 2023 」 all rights reserved. do not copy or post without permission.

[tales-from-syscord]

We were once in an anti-endo sys/agere server that claimed to be soooo great and progressive and you know, most servers will allow typing quirks but tend not to allow a stutter quirk because (we are sorry for this but just trying to show) t-t-t-t-they'll (they'll for those who don't wanna read that) say it like that which most people find mocking for people with actual stutters. But this one literally said that you couldn't ask for a translation for a "stutter quirk" because then you were being abelist and cruel to the system and it's just like what? We have to use a screen reader half the time (we have a form of arthritis that can mess with our eyes along with everything else plus just general eye fatigue we get) and it's so frustrating to hear "t dash t dash t dash t dash a dash" etc.

We get alters having a stutter, one of us has one from its source because its literally a broken AI and it could only communicate through kind of broken text. But even with it, someone's there to keep it under control and make sure there is no stutter.

We left soon after they allowed a system to say they were "traumaendogenic" and that they had "systemhopped" an alter into another system.

(Also we've talked here before, can we have the tag 🕷️🌌? If not that's totally okay!)

Not the systemhopping.. 💀

(Absolutely you may! I'm going to assume all new anons gotten before I replied to this with that tag are you guys, please tell me if they're not!)

[darkcrowprincess]

Lunter gender swap beautiful disasters au:

(I have no idea what beautiful disasters is. This is just a random idea I got from the trailer)

Hunter was just trying to make it on his own, away from his traumatic past. He never in a million years planned any of this. He never planned to fall in love. But you know what they say about plans. They never go the way you want.

"So it's basically fight club for women?" Hunter ask his new friends Gus and Willow. Willow smiles back at him to reassure him. "Technically yes, but it's not just beating the crap out of each other. Eda Clawthorne runs the club, and makes sure to provide first aid. Makes sure people get paid when they win their bets and stuff. The school is aware of it. So no one is doing anything illegal. Especially with Amity's parents spouncering everything."

Hunter nods, but can't help but nervously stare around at wild cheering college students in this underground room. Cheering for violence. Hunter's linkens these people to images in history books of Roman's of old, cheering in stadiums to watch gladiator matches. Hunter as you can probably guess doesn't like violence. He doesn't like lots of things. And this overcrowded room full of sweaty cheering people, as they gawk at two women in sports bras fight each other till their black and blue is the last place he wants to be. His anxiety is making his heart flutter. He second guesses accepting Gus and Willow's invitation.

This was suppose be a night out, a break from endless studying in his tiny dorm room. Gus and Willow were nice, new friends that wanted to hang out with him. Him grumpy anti social Hunter Wittebane. But honestly he rather go back to studying, isn't that what most of these people were suppose to be doing?

'Barbaric' Hunter can't help but think as he watches a girl with dyed pink hair and eye tattoo on her forehead give a hard right hook on the chin of a miss blonde ponytail. Blondie goes down hard as the crowd "oh's" in sympathy. Hunter turns to look at the doorway, estimates how long it would take to get through the thick crowd and reach the exit.

Willow and Gus are cheering, and Eda Clawthorne makes some commentary that gets the crowd to get even louder. Holding a Ms Boscha's arm in the air. Declaring her winner of this round.

Hunter turns to Willow and Gus, raising his voice "I don't think this is for me, I think I'm going to head back." Gus and Willow don't hear him. He tries again, louder and frustrated "I think I'm gonna head back, finish studying!" He goes to head out, even if they didn't hear him, he'll text them. They probably won't even notice till later, he thinks glumly. As he turns, he doesn't pay attention to who's heading towards him. Doesn't see. Doesn't see the girl stretching her arms as they collide.

He ends up bumping (chest to sports bra) into a female fighter, a short female fighter. Hunter, looks fully down at the fighter he bumps into to apologize, and feels his breathing stop and time stand still. She was tanned, she was beautifully athletic. Wearing almost nothing but black shorts and a blue sports bra. Hands taped up. Her dark brown curls tied back in a messy ponytail. The main things he noticed about her was her wide brown owl like eyes, a tiny scar on her eyebrow, and that she was smiling flirty like up at him. Hunter turns red, he can feel the heat on his cheeks staining his pale scarred skin. In the red lighting of the room she looks other worldly. Roman's and gladiators come back to mind again. She would definitely make a beautiful gladiator.

Time starts up again, as quickly as it stopped. The crowd turns on a again and euphoric silence is gone. Hunter tries to talk but he sounds like an idiot, only coming up with a stuttering, "Hello." The girl smiles back at him even bigger and sweeter at this. She gently pushes against his chest. That's when he realizes they where chest to chest close. Or really more of chest to him accidentally bumping her sports bra close. Finally having room between them, the girl gently boops his nose, " Excuse me, Pigeon."

Automatically, he moves. She passes by him with a giggle and a swing of her hips. The crowd easily parting for her like Moses and the red sea. She heads to the cage, turning her head towards him one last time to chirp, " Hope you enjoy the show Pigeon!" She closes the cage behind her, still smiling at him. A bright playful smile. Eda Clawthorne's voice announces loud, echoing in the room, "Next up is Ms Luz Noceda, a regular spitfire here, hoping to make it to the championship!"

Hunter watches dazed as that short athletic girl, totally and utterly demolishes her opponent. Grateful like a dance, yet wild and care free with every punch. In between the punches, she catches his eye again. She winks and mouths " Are you watching Pigeon?". Than turns back and gives a hard punch to the chin. Hunter eyes wide and dazed mutters, " My names not Pigeon. "

Again Hunter never really planned to fall in love. Especially with Luz Noceda. But everything about them was always a beautiful disaster.

[lavenderlambie]

Introduction

Hello! Hello! I am alter in a Polyfrag Traumagenic System. I am 1 of main hosts! I go by Lambie but Clyde is fine as well! This is my blog!

I am alter who needs lots of help. I am semi-verbal currently the few past months and somewhat year but don't remember exactly. Other alters usually speak for me or 'add' to what I make of my voice. Voice is quiet, weak, and stutters badly when attempt. Am starting use AAC more! Would like advice how organize AAC and such. I use Speech Assistant as starting AAC app.

I use this blog to talk about disabilities n disorders [DID, CFS, Autism, Tourettes, & NPD], I enjoy answer the questions as well! I also use this blog talk bout interests and such!! I enjoy Puppets [Welcome Home, My Friendly Neighborhood, Muppets, Sesame Street], Horror [Movie n Games], Sonic + Sonic.exe [And creepypasta overall], Mickey n Oswald, & Plushies!

I draw and writes! Though writing takes lots of energy, I put lots of energy in long text posts so can be understandable though hurts lots.

I age regress lots, so will share art of agere and have reblogs of it! While on agere topic, I will discuss of diapers [Even incontinence, as it affects me heavily]. Please do not judge that.

I identify with lambs and plushies lots! Always looks like one in headspace even with how much appearance constantly changes. I identify with otherkin terms and similar.

I aspire be game developer n content creator! N gets helps with all my needs as disabled person.

DNI

DNI: Usual Bigots, Ableists, Pro-Ship, Rad-Queer, Kink + NSFW, Narc Abuse Truthers, + Anti-Agere / Petre

Credits 2 @local-leon 4 dni banner! He is very kind caregiver. He takes requests 4 banners n moodboards! <3

[klaine-a03-feed]

And he's the boy who gets your love (and gets your heart)

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/axV85im by adankrivervalleynearyou “Hey, killer,” Sebastian gets closer, looping his arm around his shoulders and pulling him close, “penny for your thoughts?” There’s a stuttering in Blaine’s chest at the sudden proximity, a warmth pooling somewhere in him, but he swallows it and shoots him a smirk, “You really think I’m that cheap?” Sebastian’s answering laugh rumbles through him, and he can’t help but lean into him just a little, “Alright, fine,” He crouches down a little and now he’s right there, right in front of him, and Blaine is too drunk and too sober all at once, “You tell me what the teen angst is about, and I buy you another beer.”  Words: 3774, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Glee (TV 2009) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Blaine Anderson, Sebastian Smythe, Kurt Hummel, not just mentioned now! Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson & Kurt Hummel, Kurt Hummel & Sebastian Smythe Additional Tags: Underage Drinking, Cheating, Emotional Infidelity, and also physical infidelity, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Vomiting, Unhealthy Relationships, (not seblaine), Not Kurt Or Klaine Friendly, a lot more anti-kurt than the last one sorry, Bars and Pubs, Texting, POV Blaine Anderson, Hurt Blaine Anderson, i love making this twink go through hell, Episode: s03e05 The First Time, Making Out, Kissing, I Wrote This While Listening to Taylor Swift's Music, Song: A Boy Like That (West Side Story), new idea: adultery, no beta we die like blaines mental health, Not Canon Compliant

[gertlushgaming]

Snow Plowing Simulator First Snow Review (Steam)

For this Snow Plowing Simulator First Snow Review, Command a fleet of powerful snowplows, tackling realistic snowy landscapes. This free-to-play simulation adventure game challenges your plowing skills in dynamic weather conditions. Sit, relax, and plow.

Snow Plowing Simulator First Snow Review Pros:

- Decent graphics. - 9.56GB Download size. - Free to play. - Graphics settings - resolution, display mode, v-sync, max fps, gamma, resolution scale, visibility, anti-aliasing, post-processing, shadows, textures, effects, vegetation, vehicle Ray trace mirrors, and best settings button. - Can remap controls for the mouse and keyboard including Invert axis and sensitivity sliders. - Three pre-defined game difficulties - fun, realistic, and extreme. - Custom game settings - tool maneuverability (high/realistic/lack), player health (no diseases/high immunity/standard), vehicle adhesion (high/realistic/ice), collision with small elements, automatic snow dropping on reloading, show the hints where the finds are, continuous snow removal display. - First-person view. - Mailboxes outside properties show jobs and job descriptions and here is where you hand in completed jobs. - Tutorial pop-ups as you play. - The online shop on your office PC is where you can buy tools, clothes, plows, etc. - Power-ups last X amount of time and you buy them online from restaurants. - The game is going for realism in a lot of ways from managing the cold to balancing the books. - Jobs and your office will have a snow removal completion number and a mini-map showing what has snow and what doesn't. - Shoveling snow is easy as you hold the button down and a blue square shows where you are shoveling, depending on the difficulty you can freely change direction. - A handy little number pops up to show how heavy the snow is that you are shoveling. - You can find rewards like cash in the snow but you have to click it quickly. - The end of the job breakdown shows the time taken, name and address of the client, weight of snow removed, earnings, and a star rating out of five. - Hold down the Q key to highlight all snow still needed ING to be cleared. - A full 3D world with 360-degree camera control. - Find Artifacts to help with the mystery of the game, all found Artifacts go on the pin boars in your office. - A wardrobe is where you go to change your clothes. - Many keyboard shortcuts for the menus. - You can hide the hud at any time. - Vehicles have in-car or third-person view. - Mark jobs from the map to have them shown on the compass. Snow Plowing Simulator First Snow Review Cons: - Performs badly from stutters to screen tearing and graphics constantly popping in and out. - No controller support. - Doesn't feel as smooth as you would like when clearing snow. - Driving is bad. - The menu buttons and shortcuts are just ugly blocks of text, yes you can hide them but they are so ugly it makes reading them when you do need them harder. - Very easy to leave pixel-width snow particles that have to be cleared for 100 percent. - The first five minutes are just a constant bombardment of *tutorial* pop-ups. - Shoveling is tedious. - Any sort of precision is a frustrating task. - The music is very bland and not that energetic for the tasks at hand. - No timer on the screen. Related Post: Jurassic Park Classic Games Collection Review (Steam) Snow Plowing Simulator First Snow: Official website. Developer: FreeMind S.A. Publisher: PlayWay Store Links - Steam Read the full article

[bigolechompers]

in my dream today i was danny phantom and i was on the phone with bruce fucking wayne

on tim drakes phone actually, it could fly for some reason and got past the anti aircraft thing we had without alerting anyone because it was so small

i had it in my hands and text on it said unknown user detected

and then the background went from blue hologram techy to pikachu and bruce wayne was calling

i put him on speaker and subtitles appeared it was great

it accurately captured my stuttering butmessed up on some other words as i tried to convince bruce wayne to not come over here (i knew he was batman but like i didnt say that) and no nothings wrong here but you really shouldnt

but this was an interlude to a festivity with me (not danny) so granny called me to eat so i had to stop roleplaying as danny and go eat barbeque (before this point i actually was danny phantom, dream logic ig)

[once-in-a-blue-moon-rising]

Ok, so I've seen lots of headcanons about Mycroft being distressed about the Queen's death and Greg comforting him (and, honestly, cute) ... but as an anti-monarchy Brit who loves projecting onto Mycroft, let me offer an alternative:

We know Mycroft referred to an unspecified royal as a 'very old friend', the implication being it's probably the Queen, but we also hear Mycroft at various points decrying any kind of intimate relationship on the grounds that everyone else is, comparatively, goldfish (although it's clear he adores Sherlock, and he and Greg are also clearly made for each other, I do think it makes sense for his character that they really are anomalies).

SO, let's interpret that comment as the fact that the Queen is, for him, a long-standing ally - not entirely deplorable, but mainly just useful to have on side because, ya know, she's the Queen.

And so when she does die, the cause of Mycroft's monumental headache is not grief, but the fact that he has to beat off journalists until the palace is ready to announce it, plus contribute to the logistics of the funeral, the coronation, deal with anger of those who think it's fucking outrageous that so much money is being spent on the whole rigamorale and not, idk, homeless people... AND now he has to speak to Charles. Who he really, really doesn't like.

And so when Greg turns up unexpectedly with coffee at Mycroft's office - and bear in mind this is a coincidence; the announcement's not been made to the public yet - he looks at Mycroft's face and he just knows, immediately.

'Oh my god', he says, plonking the coffee on the desk, and looking up at Mycroft. 'It's happened, hasn't it?'

'No', Mycroft says stiffly. Then: 'Stop smiling.'

But the thing is, Greg has never been super fond of the royal family, always a bit anti-establishment, even though he ended up in the police... and he can't. He breaks out into a full grin, and then he starts giggling... and Mycroft has never been able to hold himself together when Greg starts laughing.

And suddenly, the worst afternoon of all time is bearable, and they're giggling away together in Mycroft's office, trying not to laugh too loudly with the whole floor conversing in respectful whispers outside the door.

'Do you want me to lose this position?' Mycroft hisses, when he can catch his breath. He pauses. 'Although, it might be preferable to - '

'Charlie?'

Mycroft hums then, trying to retain some shred of... propriety, perhaps, not that Greg needs that from him.

'You're a horrible influence', he declares instead, and he lets Greg kiss him, and smooth his hair back, his laughter finally stuttering to a halt.

'I know', Greg says, and he steps back. 'Give me a text if you need anything else, yeah?'

[getosubaru]

valentine’s winner

after the final competition, you decide who’s won the day with you. basically, solomare is full of cowards and i wanted to pick a date.

gn!reader, no pronouns used, no traits of reader defined at all (including skin color)

cw: mentions of alcohol in simeon’s part

inspo from @simeonsaysobeyme for sol’s history and simeon’s date <3

small text only for description

Twelve faces stare back at you after Diavolo announces it’s time for you to choose the winner. The amount of pressure over a date is ridiculous, but there was one who stood out to you. Taking a deep breath, you stand up straighter and close your eyes.

“I pick…”

Lucifer

“Of course you made the best choice.”

Acts completely unsurprised.

He’s all smug smiles and lording it over the others, but there’s red brushed across his face and ears.

While the Anti-Lucifer League (and Mammon) rant about your poor taste, he draws you in for a quick kiss.

Absolutely not to rile them up further. Definitely not.

Privately much softer about it, as per the course with him.

“Spending the day alone with you is a better gift than any I could have received.”

Plans a date at the symphony for Valentine’s Day, followed by dinner at a restaurant of your choice.

Extremely formal at first, since he has no idea how to be anything else.

Loosens up a bit when you pull him into a dance after the symphony, still humming the music.

People are staring and you’re right outside the concert hall, but he’s enthralled with your easy smile.

It’s hard to feel foolish when you’re giving him the grin you reserve just for him.

Mammon

“YES!”

Takes him a minute to realize what he actually won.

Cue stuttering and blushing and downplaying how excited he is.

His brothers take the opportunity to mock his tsundere ways, but he’s not exactly paying attention to them.

He recovers fairly quick with his ego.

“Why wouldn’t ya wanna spend the day with me?”

Kiss the sore winner on his flushed cheek to watch him blue screen.

Date is the Devildom’s version of go-carts.

Bet him kisses for each round he wins.

His competitive nature will kick in and make all of the races cutthroat.

But he’s flustered when you pull ahead on the final lap.

“You beat me! What’d’ya want as your prize, human?”

Just a kiss and that lovesick look in his eyes.

Leviathan

Sorry, did you think he’d be able to form words?

His brain shut down the second you said his name.

After he reboots, expect some version of his usual spiel.

“Me?? Are you sure?? Why would you want—“

Best idea is to start planning your date right then and there if you don’t want him to collapse.

He’ll come back to himself as soon as you suggest karaoke.

Bonus points if you agree to cosplay and sing anime intro songs together.

“This one’s from I Thought Confessing Was the Scariest Part, But Now We’re On a Date and I’m Terrified! It really picks up in season 3…”

Not many people really listen to him or even pretend to.

Your unwavering attention might just boost his confidence enough to hold your hand.

Just be careful not to startle him so bad he gets a nosebleed.

Satan

“I’m glad I was able to win you over.”

Probably one of the most chill about it. Just a happy smile and blushy face.

Secretly relishing in the disappointment of a select few of his brothers, but he’s not going to be obvious about it.

Expect him to call you “valentine” as a pet name for a while, though. Both to be cute and to rub it in their faces.

“Good morning, my valentine.” with a quick kiss on your forehead the next day at breakfast.

Date is an antique store that also specializes in rare books, followed by a trip to a cat cafe.

“This one is an old collection of Devildom fairytales. Would you like me to read you my favorite?”

Read to him after he’s done, with his head in your lap and a cat sitting on his chest.

He might not have ever stepped foot in the Celestial Realm, but he’s sure this here is better.

Asmodeus

“Yay! The two most beautiful people in the Devildom on a Valentine’s Day date? I can just see the Devilgram photos now!”

You’re a bit more covered in lipgloss than you were a few minutes ago, but his excitement is contagious.

Honestly, though, this is pretty restrained for him.

He will rub it in Mammon’s face. Distract him with more kisses to tone down the mean girl attitude.

Your outfits are coordinated for the date, not matching.

“Matchy-match just invites comparison, darling! While you may not be me, I don’t want you to feel the least bit dimmed on our date!”

You take tons of photos, but your favorite is one of the pair of you in mud masks at the salon making faces at the camera.

It’s awful and there’s mud in your hair and he’s grinning with all his teeth, but that’s the Asmo you love.

He sets it as his lockscreen, even after whining about how unflattering it looks.

The happiness in your eyes is worth it.

Beelzebub

“I can’t wait to try out all the Valentine’s Day specials with you!”

Another surprised one. Wasn’t expecting it, to be honest.

Very little grumbling from the others, because he just looks so thrilled.

Your choice whether to bring Belphie with you, but Beel would be happiest with both his favorite people there.

If you’re against inflicting him on poor service industry workers on the busiest day of the year, suggest a meal at home with a movie marathon in your room.

“Everything tastes better with you here, so I’m happy no matter what we do.”

You may have to use the pacts to keep the others away, but it’s for a good cause.

Cook up a special meal and spend the evening cuddling with the Devildom’s biggest marshmallow.

Belphegor

“You wanna spend the day with me?”

Smug Part 2. The worst kind of sore winner.

He’ll tease you relentlessly for liking him, even though he’s more awake than you’ve seen him in a while.

Your choice on bringing Beel or not. They are kind of a packaged deal.

Date is a planetarium trip.

They have both the Devildom’s sky and the human world one.

Whispers the stories of the constellations you’re unfamiliar with in your ear as an excuse to be closer to you.

“Just over there are Beel and I’s stars. The constellation next to them is meant to be…”

Falls asleep on your shoulder muttering about how no star in the sky could compare to you.

Diavolo

“Oh, this will be so much fun!”

Literal sunshine in demon form is practically glowing.

A bit surprised you picked him, but he isn’t going to question it.

Rein him in before he starts trying to buy you a cruise ship or something.

Belphie and Mammon are the ones pitching the biggest fit about your choice. And Luke, but Barb’s distracted him with macaroons.

He’s gonna take everything he’s ever learned about dates from human media and go overboard with it.

Flowers? Yes. Too many. Even Asmo is complaining.

Cancel his fancy reservation and tell Barb to lay out casual clothes for him.

Pack a picnic basket and drag him out to the beach.

Just the two of you on the sand, watching the waves.

Promise he’ll love it more than any over the top outing.

Barbatos

“I’d love to spend Valentine’s Day with you.”

No, he didn’t see this coming. Of course he wouldn’t misuse his powers like that.

Diavolo is delighted, especially since his friend’s ears are suspiciously pink.

And honestly the others find it hard to argue with your choice.

His first instinct is to plan and take care of everything. You’re not going to change his mind easily.

Snap him out of butler-mode by suggesting a museum trip in the human world.

“Hmm, this one has a quite famous tea shop around the corner…”

Someone seeing him for more than the role he plays is the best gift you could give him.

A speciality blend of tea from the shop to remember the day is the second best.

Solomon

“My apprentice does have great taste.”

Smug as shit.

Asmo, no. You’re not coming with.

Be prepared for seven different kinds of whining up until your date.

Leave your D.D.D. at home unless you wanna deal with a million interrupting texts.

Contrary to what you expected, he just invites you over to Purgatory Hall for the date.

“I had wanted to book us for this couples cooking class, but all of the spots were full before I could.”

Thank you, Simeon.

Instead, he opts to show you some spells and rituals he personally loves.

While he gathers materials, you find an old leather-bound book on his shelf.

Inside is symbols and text written in a language you can’t decipher, but his cramped, spiky handwriting is recognizable.

“Oh, that’s from when I was staying with Makeda. I think that region is called Ethiopia now.”

You realize you’re holding a book he wrote with the actual Queen of Sheba, and his timelessness suddenly feels like something you could touch.

He traces under a line of text with one finger and murmurs something against your shoulder. Gold swirls around you both.

“I’ve always found the most powerful magic is rooted in love.”

Simeon

“Oh, wonderful!”

He’s flustered, but trying not to melt in front of Luke.

Who’s going to argue with you choosing an angel? (Except Mammon)

That soft smile of his is enough to quiet any grumbling.

He picks you up with a lone flower, not a bouquet.

A single daisy slips into your fingers as he kisses you on the cheek.

The objective of the night is a couples painting class.

Luckily, it’s built for people of all skill levels, especially considering the free cocktails the staff provide.

“I can’t decide which blue to—I’m so sorry!”

He manages to smudge a bright turquoise on your cheek as he waves his brush around.

Both of you descend into giggles and it’s not long before you’re both covered in paint.

The staff politely, but firmly ask you to leave.

“Their loss. You’re the real masterpiece.”

Cheesy, but he’s still streaked with red paint and beaming at you.

When you kiss, the colors blend to a stunning purple.

Luke

“HA!”

Oh no. Hold him back before this gets ugly.

He was supposed to be the safe option. Now he looks like he’s puffed up with enough pride to make Lucifer’s head spin.

What do demons know about love anyway? Of course you picked your surrogate baby brother.

Your Pal-entine’s date wants to bake with you.

“I thought we could each make each other something! You were talking about that dessert you loved so much from home and…”

Cultural exchange as you show him how to make the dough the way you were taught and what spices to add.

He whips up a heart-shaped cake made of ingredients he ordered special from the Celestial Realm.

The tiny, sugar-dusted angel darts around the kitchen of Purgatory Hall, chattering to you the entire time.

Not even Simeon is getting a bite of the gift you made him!

Well, maybe one after he helps you both clean up.