#anti asian

[male-spirit]

[horny-3]

I'm gonna tweak if I see someone drawing an asian character with clear white features AND defending it as "it's my style🤓🤓"

[stellawilsonx]

What do you notice first when you look at me🥰

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

Hey, this is the reason that i still support the death penalty

[stellawilsonx]

Best feeling ever😍

[little-one-eyed-monsters]

Inspired by @absolutebl and @heretherebedork's posts about 10 BL endings they wish had been April Fools Jokes, presenting:

10 BLs with plots that felt like an April Fools' Joke:

(Full disclosure: I loved all of these shows. I finished all of these shows. Whether they were good, bad, frustrating, or anything in between, they scratched an itch in my brain and entertained me to no end; like any well-executed April Fools' prank).

But before that, some honorable mentions:

1. Century of Love (hi grandpa. He's probably too young for you. Also, why is there a fox spirit here? Is this a transmigration series or a fantasy series?! Pick a lane dude!)

2. Pit Babe (ah, Pit Babe. Are you an omegaverse? Are you a sports-themed bl? Are you gay X-Men? Are you the unholy amalgamation of them all? I love this color on you.)

3. The Boy Next World (so he's lying about the parallel worlds... he's just a stalker. Or, wait, there is a parallel world? But he's stal-- oh, now they're both stalkers? What the hell is going on? Well at least the leads are pretty.)

4. Four Minutes (I fried my own brain trying to understand the plot of this one. I spent my viewing hours just listlessly looking at the characters doing something on screen, praying that one day, any day, it will all make sense.)

5. Jack and Joker: U Steal My Heart (this shouldn't make the list. BUT that special episode was a JOKE. I refuse to accept it as canon.)

AND WITHOUT FURTHER ADO:

10. Battle of the Writers

Because let's be honest, after the couples got together (which they achieved at an average length of one episode each), THE PLOT WENT EVERYWHERE and NOWHERE all at once. OOH they were childhood friends, OOH now this editor is trying to steal this writer friend from his boyfriend, OOH now this other guy goes on vacation and falls for a random islander, OOH lead character randomly LOSES HIS EYESIGHT, then gets it back an episode later. OOH random actor has a crush on the lead writer.

True to its title, I fully believe that all writers involved in this show had a battle inside that boardroom to see where the series' plot is supposed to go. Sadly, they all won.

9. Dead Friend Forever

...was this a BL? Maybe. Well, they made out with each other a lot in this. I spent half of the runtime wishing half of the characters were dead, and the other half wishing the rest would get the hell out of that school. Pretty, balanced ride now that I think about it.

(Barcode and Ta' characters should have ended up together. The fact that they didn't made this series a true April Fools' joke)

8. Choco Milk Shake

Some of the leads spawned from pets. That's it. That's the premise. Otherwise, this is pretty low on the list because the execution isn't as outrageous as the initial plot. I was kinda wishing they would run with the crazy, but this is Korea. This is as crazy as it'll get.

7. Venus in the Sky

This was as plotless as Battle of the Writers. The only reason this beat out the others on the list is because the plot was so glacially, PAINFULLY slow. The pacing alone was a bamboozle all on its own. Plus, characters would do the devil's tango OUT OF NOWHERE, in the weirdest places. At one point they went to town with each other's bodies while the front door and windows were OPEN. That poor, traumatized neighborhood.

6. Anti-Reset

Main dude fell in love with a ROBOT, programmed by a company, owned by his UNCLE. Thank the heavens the robot didn't look or act remotely like a robot, otherwise this would be at the upper part of this list. The robot can... cry? Are the tears made of motor oil? Battery-fluid? Gasoline? Speaking of fluids, I have questions... bedroom wise...

5. History 4: Close To You

This was a rollercoaster from beginning to end. Manchild meets old crush at his workplace, woes her by... pretending to be in a relationship with his best friend? And then falls for his best friend. Then there was a harrassment lawsuit somewhere in there? And two dudes got married? Aight, aight.

Don't get me started on the stepbros. It's a bit ickier than Unknown's premise, because here their respective parents are still MARRIED to each other when the stepbros start doing the devil's tango. This all feels like unintentional grooming. I'm with your parents on this one, sorry.

4. Utsukushii Kare

I'm gonna say it: Hira deserved better. And I know Kiyoi is made out to be this emotionally-stunted, tortured soul who's secretly been in love with Hira all along, etc. etc. I don't care. Hira deserves to be loved by someone who expresses it openly and proudly. And isn't a bully. Yes I said it.

(Kiyoi did get better in the following season. Hira still should have chosen that photographer friend from college)

3. Word of Honor (I'm counting it. That canon ending where they live together in the mountains is as homo as any on this list)

In hindsight, this one might not be as crazy as the others on this list. Villain assassin falls in love with villain cult leader. A match made in purgatory because turns out, someone else out-evils them both. But as a couple, they made sense.

If only they didn't COMPETE to unalive themselves or each other EVERY OTHER EPISODE. Dude bro puts nails in his own body. Other dude bro jumps off a cliff. Dude bro surrenders to the enemy and suffers torture. Other dude bro sacrifices his life energy so his main dude can survive.

I swear if this was released fifteen years earlier during the bury-your-gays era, both Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu wouldn't have made it past the third episode. Draw the curtains, plot will now focus on Gu Xiang. But no, it's 2021. The gays found the censored unlimited plot armor.

2. Secret Crush on You

The premise? Simple. Guy has crush. Crush likes him back (multiply by five couples).

The execution? UNHINGED. Toh, the main character, keeps a MUSEUM's worth of souvenirs (ehem, trash) of his crush. He kept a paint can. He kept a plastic bag. He kept leftover food, guys. FOOD. He keeps his crush's leftovers DEAR GOD.)

Toh also gets drunk every time they're travelling somewhere, intentionally KISSES the girl who's trying to steal his crush away to... fend her off? Tries to kiss Saint's character because he scored him a photoshoot gig with his crush (Suppapong I'm blaming this all on you). And his crush Nuea is INTO ALL OF THAT. What the ACTUAL HELL.

The rest of the cast was precious. That's the only reason this didn't top the list.

And the biggest joke of them all:

1. My Stand-In (because WHAT IN THE YAOI HELL WAS THIS?)

Screw the bury-your-gays trope. The gay will bury you, resurrect you, make you an escort, and... marry you?

Prior to My Stand-In, I have never seen Poom Phuripan (Joe's actor) act in anything else. From his MDL, he's been in a LOT of projects as a former Channel 8 agent. In Asia, that means you're under a steady rotation of guest and supporting roles in soap operas, most times as either the most expendable character, as a villain, or the anti-hero for bigger stars.

As for Ming's actor, I've only seen Up Poompat in one thing-- a bl called Lovely Writer. I am however aware that he started quite young in the acting industry, had a supporting role in Girl From Nowhere, and did a movie with GMM's Phuwin (didn't watch those before My Stand-In. This was all random info I absorbed from the general internet).

So I know both Up and Poom had more acting experience than most of their bl contemporaries. In their case, they've both been nominated for minor awards in previous roles. They would, on paper, be experts at this point.

And THANK GOD for that. Because only an expert could properly JUSTIFY what the hell My Stand-In's plot actually was.

This is the only show I've seen in my lifetime where one main lead acts like an absolute a-hole, gets little to no character development, gets NO PUNISHMENT for his actions (no, Joe's death doesn't punish Ming. It punishes JOE. He's the one who DIED; screw your tears Ming), then STILL GETS THE HAPPY ENDING. Oh, and he's rich too.

Why does fate love Ming? We don't know. Fate is Ming-sexual.

Meanwhile, the true main lead suffers unjust amounts of physical, emotional, social, and truly dysmorphic trauma, yet... remains a sweetheart? Joe, my friend, you died twice, I THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO STAB PEOPLE NOW. Did I mention he's an orphan? And that Joe lost his career because psycho ex-situationship Ming made him miss his big acting break by HITTING him with a bat and KIDNAPPING him. So he found another job which actually KILLED him DEAD. Then he was miraculously resurrected in another body for a second chance at life, only for him to become the boytoy of... psycho ex Ming?!

Why does fate hate Joe? Because they're Ming-sexual, that's why.

I hate Ming on paper. I HATE him. If I hated Kiyoi as an otherwise misguided school bully, then Ming gets all my rage as the most SPOILED, INSENSITIVE, truly HOMICIDAL mc to ever grace my screen. Each episode felt like a turn, and all turns went left. This was... romance? No, this is a True Crimes episode fr fr.

But that just adds to the surrealness of it, because good lawd Up and Poom can ACT. Up is one fine man, but I don't think his looks alone could have justified Ming's garbage character. Up played the role with such CHARM and nuance that I couldn't look away from his trainwreck. It was masochistic. It's his fault. But was it truly? OH NO.

And Poom's acting was a REVELATION. I've seen other great Thai actors before, and not just in BL. Being Asian myself exposed me to Thai series long before I saw my first queers on screen. Poom could best a lot of them. He played Joe in otherwise natural, blink-and-you'll-miss it actions, sometimes just through his eyes. But he played it in such detail that you could physically feel how lonely he was. How frustrated. How yearning. Truly IMPRESSIVE.

My Stand-In alone convinced me to watch all of Up and Poom's back catalog. They've each played monsters and villains and comedians and love interests in the weirdest series. You guys gotta give 'em a chance. Producers, I introduce to you the one ship in BL that can make your WEIRDEST premises watchable. Hot take: give them the accursed omegaverse Pit Babe cannot commit to. I'm sure they'll be able to glorify your kinks (unless Noeul Nuttarat wants to take a stab at it)

Bonus fun fact since you made it all the way here: did you know Up Poompat's original nickname was ALSO Poom (as in the nickname of his current bl partner?) He used Poom during his BL ship run with Kao Noppakao, as well as many of his previous shows and YT channel. He changed his nickname to Up after he screentested with a DIFFERENT Poom that was supposed to be his new bl partner, but it fell through. Then purely coincidental, he found another partner also named Poom, so at least that worked itself out. So how many Pooms does it take to make a ship? Just one apparently. Otherwise it would be PoomPoom. Sounds like a champion Pomeranian. (Ha, a joke!)

And that's a wrap for the biggest April Fools' pranks on Asian queer television to date. Thank you and sound off which BL you think should make this list. Stay kooky, folks!

[heretherebedork]

I may have cackled a little bit.

Gotta catch 'em all? Apparently?

[soyboyanarchy]

Hey pspspspspsps Americans look at this

[stellawilsonx]

Black or white?😎

[ansburg]

not to soapbox but like. diasporic asians growing up the in the west were constantly told we were uncool, ugly, unfit for leading roles, and just so generally other that many of us still struggle with that self-hatred and deal with the material discrimination that comes with looking "different" from the default. so many diasporic asians have stories about how our creative accomplishments or potential were discounted because we were told we didn’t have enough “personality” – a judgment call that can’t be divorced from how racial triangulation has worked to alienate asian people from dominant cultures in the diaspora.

you know how asian people have been treated by western fantasy? we’re either

ugly and monstrous

exotified beyond recognition

or we don’t exist.

(thanks david. it’s not like thedas is the only continent the player can explore or anything. or that boats exist. where does solas get his tea btw? where do the silks in orlais originate from? why are there always asian aesthetics present without asian faces?)

when a game like bg3 comes along and the studio makes a decision to make an asian companion, it’s huge for us. that’s our crumb of representation. karlach is very obviously not “eurocentric” in her features – if anything, westernized beauty standards would have her face redone to comply with market demands.

she has monolids. she has a flat nose bridge. her cheeks are full and round, buccal fat very much in attendance. whatever she may have arguably been in previous patches, that is not what she is now. and pretending like her face – a face that, newsflash, asian people can relate to – is just a toy you can pop features out of because they don’t have enough “personality” to you, or because they’re too “soft," or because you don’t think a face like hers is “warrior-like” (whatever the fuck that means), is insensitive at best and willfully ignorant at worst. her asianness isn’t a setting to opt out of any more than wyll’s blackness is.

lastly, i’m exhausted that it even needs to be said, but being a person of color does not absolve somebody of intercommunity harm. minority status isn’t an excuse to get out of self-reflecting. it’s okay to step back and say, “wow, i didn’t think about how i’d affect members of this community,” without digging your heels in like one mistake on the internet is an extinction-level event.

studies:

[what-shitfuckery-is-this-ew]

bro i'm not even Indian but seeing all these desiblr accounts being bjp supporters is disappointing

[ziggy-dunbar188917]

the woobification of Tim Drake is crazy

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

Hello, what is goetd super race theory?

In the world of ASOIAF, the Golden Empire of Yi Ti, far to the east, is a pretty blatant expy of China. One of their myths -- and it is only their myth, nobody else's -- is the Great Empire of the Dawn, the legendary empire that preceded their own. The Yi Ti imperial dynasties are named after colors (for example, Lo Tho, Lo Duq, Lo Han, and Lo Bu were Scarlet Emperors), but their mythological ancestors were named after various gemstones. The Great Empire is pretty obviously based on the Chinese myth of the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors, and is perfectly straightforward worldbuilding. There's some interest to current ASOIAF since the end of the Great Empire of the Dawn is connected to Yi Ti's legends of the Long Night, and since the Pearl Emperor established the Five Forts (a historical echo of the Wall and likely serving a similar purpose), but that's about all that's really relevant.

However. Because Dany's dream of her Targaryen ancestors used gemstone colors to describe their eyes, a theory has been built up that the Great Empire of the Dawn was not merely Yi Ti (Chinese) mythology, but the ancestors of Valyrians from millenia ago. According to the theory, this master race also founded House Hightower and House Dayne and thus they look Chinese no wait sorry they're all silver-gold haired and purple eyes except they're not, like you'd think if those particular traits were meant to be relevant for House Hightower they would have been mentioned once in all of ASOIAF (excluding Alerie Hightower, who's in her 40s and thus her silver hair may just be prematurely grey).

I find this theory to unfortunately echo various "master race" elements of Theosophy and Nazi race science, in addition to erasing the actual our-world cultural inspiration of the Great Empire. (This sort of thing is why an artist decided to make the Maiden-Made-of-Light, a Yi Ti goddess, a blonde white girl and based on Selene, instead of, idk, Ameratsu or Doumu.) I really truly dislike the theory and everything connected with it, and the fact that it's all built up over a misreading of one line makes it all the more frustrating to me. Like, I don't care for a particular theory Youtuber for most of his crack nonsense, among other reasons, but this one is especially bad.

Of course, the fact that House Hightower also gets hit with the Citadel-related southron ambitions theory and maester anti-magic conspiracy theory, which do have some standing, but have been blown up by paranoid ASOIAF video theorists on youtube and Tiktok to make them the eugenical secret breeders of all the noble houses and the secret reason for anything bad that ever happened to House Targaryen ever and the manipulators of all historical texts so the only true facts are the ones that put your blorbos in a good light, to the point that I've started calling this paranoia "the Protocols of the Elders of Hightower" -- anyway, the fact the Hightowers have these diametrically opposed fan theories attached to them, is something I'd find hilarious if it didn't depress me so much about fandom. 🤷‍♀️