#another barely developed story idea I’ll probably never write
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djhonnie14 · 2 years ago
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Modern AU- Cody and Obi have been together for a few months and with all of his brothers in town for the week (celebration of some sort?) it seems like the perfect time to introduce Obi to the clan
Except when they arrive to game night at Jango’s, Fox (recently back in town) seems to recognize Obi and calls him Ben
Obi gets super embarrassed and is very quiet and there’s a weird vibe between him and fox and fox and Cody until it finally comes out
Flashback to uni days-
twenty-something twink Obi with daddy issues galore and his best buddy (with occasional benefits) Quinlan go clubbing and run into Fox who’s been forced out to socialize by his law school buddies. Long story short- they have a threesome
Quin and Obi stop hooking up shortly after bc Quin and Fox get together and spend the next decade as on-again-off-again life partners
Obi somehow only puts the pieces together when he’s introduced to fox by Cody in jango’s living room like 10 years later. Cody has to tease out what’s wrong which results in a conversation that includes the phrase “I kriffed your brother”
Cody ends up thinking it’s hilarious- especially after Obi promises Cody’s better in bed.
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bakuhoes-dumbass · 4 years ago
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Aberration - Chapter 2
MHA!Various x Fem!Reader
Thriller/Horror/Drama
Criminal!AU
Words: 1.5k
A/N: Yay, here’s the second chapter of my new AU! It’s a little shorter but I promise chapters will get longer as we go.
Warnings: Yandere Themes, Mentions of murder, blood, felonies, bullying, swearing.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of MHA, just this story. In no way does this reflect the characters, writers or VAs of the show/manga. MINORS DNI.
~~~
Aberration Masterlist
~~~
"Now, on to your next subject. Inmate 04, Eijiro Kirishima." You flip the page of your inmate profiles to see a picture of a red-haired man. "He is of a higher danger level, so make sure to keep your guard up. And for the love of God, under any circumstances…
Do not touch him."
Only slightly acknowledging his warning, you look down at your notes, eyebrows shooting up in surprise at the words on the page. "He suffers from Erotomania? Interesting…"
Aizawa nods. "Ah, yes. A very rare condition indeed, especially in males. The affected person strongly believes that another individual is in love with them. This delusion develops and persists despite clear evidence to the contrary."
"That's a very exciting find. I can't wait to meet him." Your eyes light up, quite intrigued.
Aizawa sighs and gestures with his head. "Follow me."
Kirishima's room was only a few doors down from Tokoyami's. Once again, Aizawa presses his hand to a key code and you hear the door unlock, following a buzzer. You slowly make your way into the room. It mirrors Tokoyami's down to the last detail, the only difference being a redhead was currently doing pushups.
He barely acknowledges a person stepping into his room, eyes flitting to your form and back to the ground. It takes him a moment to realize it was someone new. As soon as he does, his eyes widen and he springs onto his feet, slightly startling you.
"Oh! Hello there! You're new!"
You nod your head and smile at the red-head. "That I am. My name is Y/N and I'm the newest scientist at this facility. My role here is to get to know and observe you all to help further our findings for a cure." You choose to leave out the 'friends' part, as something about him makes you weary. You don't need anything being misinterpreted.
"Hello there, Y/N! My name is Kirishima!" He takes a step towards you but is suddenly stopped by a lower force. You look down to see his ankles chained to the heavy-duty bed frame, connected to him by quirk-canceling cuffs. You look back up to see him looking at you intensely, with a shark-toothed smile. "Man, you're really pretty!"
You swallow thickly, but keep your smile. "That's very kind of you to say, Kirishima. Now, if I may." You take a seat at the desk like you did with Tokoyami. Kirishima follows suit and sits across from you on the bed. His smile never wavers, making you slightly uneasy. You ignore it and turn to a blank page in your notebook. "Now, if you could please state your full name, age and date of birth?"
He gives you a chuckle and points to himself proudly with his thumb. "I'M Eijiro Kirishima! I'm 22 years old and my Birthday is October 16th!"
You giggle softly at his extroverted personality. "Ahh, same birth month as Tokoyami." You mumble to yourself. His ears perked up and his smile faltered slightly.
"You met Tokoyami already?"
"Hm?" You look up and smile fondly. "Ah yes, I have. He was the first one. A very nice young man."
You look back down at your notes, failing to see Kirishima's eye twitch slightly. He returns to his signature smile as you look up at him again. "And what is your quirk?"
"Oh, it's so cool! I can harden my entire body to an extreme. I can make myself a shield or a weapon! Pretty manly, am I right?" Kirishima wiggles his eyebrows at you, causing you to chuckle.
"That is definitely a unique one, Kiri." You, once again, fail to notice the way his eyes light up at the nickname, too busy looking down at your notes. "Now I see here that you've been charged with Stalking and 2 counts of second degree murder. Is that correct?"
"Yup! Although I don't understand how it would be considered 'Stalking', when she always knew I was around. She was okay with it, too! I mean, we WERE in love, you know." He furrows his brows.
You raise a brow and write down everything he says. "Care to continue explaining what happened? Why were you brought into this facility?"
Kirishima sighs and rests his chin on his hand, a dazed look on his face. "Well, you see. There was this girl. We were totally, completely head over heels for each other. You've probably heard of her, Kim Hyuna?"
Your eyebrows shoot up. Yeah, you heard of her. She is one of the biggest idols around right now, extremely pretty and extremely talented. She has millions of fans from around the world. You already can see where the direction of this story is headed.
He continues with a wide smile. "We used to go out on dates everywhere. To the mall, the salon, even to her dorms. We were so in love." His dazed expression turns sour. "Then that stupid boy shows up outta nowhere. He took her from me. He dared to take something so precious from me. So, I couldn't take it anymore and, uh, kinda killed them."
You watched him rub the back of his neck sheepishly, like the situation was no more than a mere broken dish he dropped on accident. You nod your head carefully, writing the last bit of information down. Clicking your pen, you look up and give the young man a fake smile.
"Well, that's it for today, Kirishima. I must take my leave, but I'll be back to run some tests soon."
Kirishima frowns and quickly stands up. "W-Wait, already?"
You gather up your notes and clipboard. "Yes, unfortunately. I do have some other patients I need to get to before-" as you go to stand up, your foot gets caught under the chair leg and you trip. You accidentally fall forward and into something hard. Looking up, you realized you fell against Kirishima himself, your hands splayed out against his chest.
His eyes widen, staring down at your hands against his chest, something shifting in his eyes. Before you're able to pull your hands away, his own reach up and snatch your wrists, holding them in place. A blush appears on the apples of his cheeks.
"Y-Y/N. I-I had no idea you felt the same."
Your eyes widen in fear. You attempt to tug your hands away, but his iron grip tightens into a bruising force. "Kirishima, I would advise you to kindly let go of me. Please, don't misunderstand the situation."
His grin widens, showcasing his sharp teeth. Red eyes bore into yours with a wild look. You hear the door buzz behind you and a flood of voices coming in. You feel a pair of arms reach around you and hands grip your elbows. Two pairs of hands each grab Kirishima by the arms and force him to release his grip on you. You watched two of Aizawa's assistants hold down a struggling Kirishima as you were forcibly dragged out of his room.
Once safely outside, you were spun around to meet the eyes of a fuming and worried doctor. "Are you alright, Y/N?" Aizawa's eyes travel along your body, doing a quick examination to make sure nothing was injured.
You nod your head and rotate your slightly bruised wrists. "Y-Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little shaken up."
Aizawa sighs. "Didn't I say NOT to touch him? His obsession tends to solidify with physical contact."
You wince. "I know. This time it was an accident. I tripped and he just happened to, uh, be the 'wall' I fell against." You think back to the moment you fell against Kirishima. His chest felt almost rock solid, not like a normal human body would be. Now you're thinking that his quirk leaked through the cuffs and that thought scares you.
"Nobody said you were clumsy when you were hired," he sighs and runs a hand down his tired face. "There are still 9 other inmates you need to check with. And 6 out of the 9 are above Kirishima's danger level. Are you still up for it today?"
You shake out your hands and nod your head. "Yes! I am. A little scare never bothered me. This is my job."
Aizawa hummed in reply and flipped through his clipboard, stopping on a page. "Inmate 09, Keigo Takami. Mafia leader. He's a level 7 as well, but doesn't have delusions like Inmate 04 does. While he's very dangerous, he's a little more tolerable." Aizawa hesitates before continuing. "Er, minus the excessive flirting."
You sigh and flip through Keigo's information. "Oh goodie. Well, let's get this over with." You follow Aizawa to Keigo's door and once it buzzes, you enter the pristine, white room.
"Good afternoon Mr. Keigo, my name is Y/N and I'll-" You look up from your notes to see a half naked man with blonde hair and bright red bird wings lounging on his bed. Your jaw drops and you hold your clipboard up in front of your suddenly heated face.
Keigo looks over to you with his brows raised. "Well well, looks like we've got ourselves a new baby bird. How…" The handsome man's lips turn up into a cocky smirk.
"...interesting."
~~~
Taglist: @theblueslytherin @sterassion @somechick30003 @meena-in-a-nutshell @justtj-andnonumberspls @zombieonna @amajikiwife @yulifee @atexansadventureintokinkandlife @ep-ip-ha-ny @hcneymilkks @pastelmoonwitche @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l @railmeddy @unlimitedfirepheonix @confaegion @drownedbytears @burntcrips @silverqueenie @the-lady-writes-what @awkward-confused @themotherofmoons @ihaveakoreanseoul @1-800-multifandomness @tragically-here @andyronii @sunnnyshark @henhouse-horrors  @dabis-s-whore 
(If your name is bolded, I couldn’t tag you)
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neonacity · 4 years ago
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LUCID | NCT DREAM ‘00 LINE X READER | CH.6
LUCID DREAMS - A TYPE OF DREAM WHEREIN THE PERSON IS AWARE THAT THEY ARE CAUGHT IN A DREAM WORLD.
Summary: It was supposed to be a harmless, professional transaction. You were to tutor a group of boys, get your pay at the end of the day, and go home to your loving fiance. Kids aren’t supposed to be dangerous, right? So why, then, are you caught up in a web of madness that slowly makes you feel like you’re in a living nightmare?
NOTE:This is a yandere plot featuring NCT Dream ‘00 line which means there will be mature themes in the story as well as obsessive, toxic behavior. If you’re a minor, please refrain from interacting. If this isn’t your thing, then just scroll and skip. In no way am I condoning anything written here— this is not love, this is obsession—nor do I think that any of the people mentioned here will act any way like in this story. This is purely a work of fiction.
Genre: yandere, horror, suspense
TW: abuse, obsessive behavior, toxic relationships, suggestive scenes, stalking, possible kidnapping, mental health. Age gap–though nothing dramatic. Everyone is of legal age, drugs, slight smut for this chapter but nothing graphic, questionable consent (?) I guess? Creepy, creepy, creepy! This will be updated as the story goes along.
CHAPTER 1 | CHAPTER 2 | CHAPTER 3 | CHAPTER 4 | CHAPTER 5
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“EVERYONE HAS A DARKER NATURE. EVERYONE. GOOD MEN FEAR IT, AND EVIL MEN EMBRACE IT.” - JAMES ISLINGTON
The silent hum of the air conditioning filled the space like a foreboding chant. Nothing else but the sound of the hospital machinery and random noises outside pierced the stillness of the room as you stared, unseeing, at the green and orange numbers that blinked on the monitor above the bed. 
You barely have any recollection of how you managed to find yourself in the hospital, but you do remember brief memories of Taeyong picking you up from the floor you found yourself crumpled on after you got the call. You remember seeing Jaehyun's parents at a brightly lit corridor and his mother pulling you into a hug as she broke down and his father telling you how his son hasn't woken up since he was brought to the emergency room.
You remember your heart breaking in shock, mind too numb from the godforsaken pills you have been taking and your own injury. So many times you wondered to yourself if you were still caught in one of your nightmares, but every time you tried to break free from it, you're slapped back with the reality of how all of this is real.
Your fingers gently tightened on Jaehyun's hands now as your gaze landed on his face. He looked so peaceful, like he's just sleeping, that you almost wanted to bend over and try to kiss him awake. You don't even have any idea what time and day it is already, but you have barely left his side since you were brought to him. The nightmares and sleeplessness? They're barely a problem for you anymore because right now, you're entirely not resting at all unless your body forces you to crash from physical exhaustion. Even then, you usually only sleep for about two to three hours at best to make sure that you never miss a moment with your fiance.
"Severe traumatic head injury. He was lucky enough that the airbag shielded him from the worst of the impact."
The words of his attending doctor echoed in your head again like a faraway voice. You could only remember bits and pieces of what he said to his parents back then as he reported his findings, but you caught enough context for you to draw a picture of the situation. You remember Jaehyun's mother asking the chances of her son waking up again, her voice barely holding up from her emotions. 
"I cannot promise anything, Ma'm. I'd say he has a 60 percent chance. He's fighting."
And he is. You know Jaehyun inside out. He might be unconscious now, but there is no way he is giving up. Not from something like this. 
"Keep fighting baby…" you whispered in the stillness of the room as you lifted his hand gently to your lips to kiss. "I'll wait for you. We still have a wedding to do."
The slight creaking of the door barely made you look away from his sleeping face. You only did at the gentle sound of a throat clearing, your eyes slightly widening as you recognized the man who just walked inside the room. Taeil had the same mildly shocked look on him as he stopped on the  other side of the bed across from you. 
"You…"
"Are you a relative of the patient?" He asked now as he tucked his clipboard under his arm. You simply nodded, watching him quickly glance at the numbers on the monitor before his eyes settled on you again.
"I'm his fiancee."
That made him raise his brows slightly. He pulled a pen now from the pocket of his coat to quickly write something on his file. "What a coincidence. Not a good one obviously. I'm sorry to hear about him. Mr. Jung, right?"
You swallowed. You didn't want to acknowledge anything that he just said so you tried to divert the conversation instead.
"You're not his doctor. Why are you…"
"Oh. He was turned over to me today. I am one of the resident neurologists here but he had to be moved to me because his first doctor has too much in his plate already. Don't worry, I was briefed properly about his case."
Your gaze followed Taeil as he bent over to check Jaehyun's oxygen level as well as the other wires attached to him. You don't know what to feel about him taking over, but at least you already know him previously.
"Are there any changes? Positive ones?" You asked in a frail voice that Taeil definitely didn't miss. You told yourself to not act silly and ask questions that probably do not have answers yet, but you couldn't help yourself now. The man seemed to think over his words first, noticing your state, before calmly giving his reply.
"No particular ones, but the fact that there are no negative developments is… something. I will have to request for some tests to be done on him again tomorrow so we can see if there are positive changes in his brain."
Neutral. Not good, but at least it's not bad either.
"How are you? I was about to check on you again. Is your head okay?"
You were still thinking over his words that you barely caught his question. Looking up, you tried to scramble for an answer to give. To be honest, you haven't given proper attention to your own injury since this happened. You would even only remember to take your medications on your clearest, less anxious moments, which, honestly, isn’t a lot. 
"I'm uh… the wound has closed. But the headaches. They're still there."
He simply nodded. "Any other side effects?"
You didn't immediately answer. You didn't want to sound whiny, but it's not like you're going to lose anything by telling him the uglier parts of your recovery. You swallowed to try and dislodge the slight blockage in your throat.
"Nightmares…" you said now, voice soft. You briefly remembered the last one you had back in the manor before you woke up to the bad news and you felt your stomach turn again. "Lots of them. Hallucinations sometimes…"
The doctor watched you carefully and you know he is trying to compute things in his mind despite his face remaining calm.
"Have you been keeping to your schedule with your medications? Are you taking too much?"
You firmly shook your head no to his last question.
"No, I haven't been overdosing. But… I've been skipping my pills the last few days because of...because of this."
"How have you been feeling since you started missing your dosages then? Do you remember?"
That made you actually stop and think about it for a moment. Now that you are paying attention, you did notice how the nightmares have calmed down slightly. Even the hallucinations are almost gone. You frowned slightly to yourself.
"A bit… better actually."
Taeil took his time to observe you a bit more before writing something on a new page of his clipboard.
"You must have had severe reactions to the mixture of pills I gave you. I'm going to prescribe you new ones and ask the nurses to pick them up and bring them to you here. Can you promise that you'll try and take them though? You really need them to fully heal."
You nodded and gave him a slightly sheepish look.
"I will, thank you very much."
Taeil dug his hands into the pockets of his coat and gave you a gentle smile.
"Well, that's it for today. I'll come back tomorrow to give you updates about Mr. Jung." He had already turned and started walking away when he suddenly stopped to look at you again.
"Oh, and another thing. Please try and get some sleep. Recover… and then focus on helping your fiance."
******* You didn't really know what woke you up. Stirring from your sleep, the first thing that registered to you was the sound of distant traffic mixed with the gentle chirping of the morning birds from outside the window. A warm feeling radiated on your cheek and made the back of your eyelids glow red.
You flickered your eyes open and immediately rolled away to escape the ray of sunshine that slipped from the open curtains and shone directly at your face. You easily evaded it as you moved over to the other side of the bed which was empty and cold from the night before.
That was when you finally remembered that you were back in your home, in the same bedroom you share with Jaehyun. The day before, his mother offered to take the responsibility of watching over him so there was a sudden change of plans that finally gave you the reason to check back into your apartment after so long. If it were you, you would have preferred not leaving your boyfriend’s side until he wakes up, but you also knew that your future mother-in-law wanted to spend time with him so you relented. 
Of course you weren't thrilled to be home alone, especially with Jaehyun not being there, but the comfort that a real mattress provided—over the small couch you used to sleep in back at the hospital—is definitely a welcome change for your body. You even tried to take your medicine properly, the new ones that Taeil had provided, in the hopes of getting knocked down fast. Your adrenaline and anxiety had been fueling you in the past days, but you know from the way your heart thumped and your hands shook that you need a solid rest.
And you got it. You still feel a little groggy now but your body is definitely lighter and your head clearer. The nightmares didn't even come, and while they were replaced by total darkness or dreams in white that still made you anxious, you are willing to take those anytime over the graphic ones that you used to have.
You gently sat back against the headrest of the bed now and reached out for your phone to check the time. It's barely 7AM but as expected, Jaehyun's mom has already provided you with updates from the hospital. He’ll have some tests taken today as Taeil advised and then they’ll hear more about his progress. From the looks of it, she seems still set on watching over her son, which means you still have at least today free to yourself.
You quickly typed a reply to her and sighed. You’re thankful that even though you weren’t related by blood, his parents have always treated you as if you were their own. Having a family is not something you’ve really experienced in your childhood, so that’s something you’ve always appreciated about them. That is also the reason why you wish for the best out of this situation, because you also couldn’t bear seeing your fiance’s mother and father heartbroken. He’s their only son, after all.
A quick look around your room left you feeling empty. The last week has been so hard that it felt longer and now you’re struggling to find your normal pace again. In an effort to bring yourself to focus, you decided to pick up your phone once more and started flipping through your calendar to check your schedule. It didn’t take long for you to frown when you realized the upcoming dates there. You’ve plotted important academic schedules in advance and one quick look at it told you how much you’ve obviously missed in the past week. You’ve been so lost in the mess of everything that has happened that you’ve entirely forgotten about your job at the manor. You realized that they didn’t even call you once to ask about your absence, probably because they also know about the situation, but even that is not enough excuse for you to entirely fall off the radar.  
Biting your lip, you quickly scrolled through your contacts now to look for the number you need. Your thumb hovered over the call button momentarily, but you eventually pressed it anyway. Your eyes wandered towards the clock on the wall, hoping silently to yourself that it wasn’t too early for you to call.
“Rosewood Manor, how can I help you?”
You straightened on your seat.
“Hey, Taeyong. It’s me. Sorry if I called so early.”
The other boy seemed to have been taken slightly by surprise by the way he fell silent at the other end of the line. You tapped your finger against your knee, waiting for him to speak again.
“Hi. No, it’s fine. Work started for me about an hour ago. Are you okay? How’s things on your end?”
You nibbled guiltily on your lower lip and finally got off your bed to walk over to the window. You pushed the curtains open and stared at the slight snowfall that had started falling on the ground. You’ve missed so many days of reporting to them but the first thing he does is to check if you’re fine.
“I um—things are still the same. My boyfriend’s still at the hospital.”
“Oh… I’m so sorry to hear that.”
“Look, I want to apologize. I haven’t really reported to work and I didn’t even call about it. It’s just that—things have been so crazy lately, but still that isn’t an excuse for me to just not show up.”
Taeyong, however, was understanding as always. You were about to go off for another round of apologies when he gently cut you off. 
“Hey, it’s fine. We know you’ve been dealing with a lot lately so we also weren't expecting anything. Don’t worry too much about it.”
“But, the boys’ examinations and portfolio review is happening in three days and I haven’t really checked in with them. How are they doing now?”
“Oh...that. Well, we actually tried looking for a temporary tutor to help out but I...uh… I think he isn't really cutting it. Maybe because he isn’t the one who started the program with them. But he’s a big help still.”
“Oh god, I’m so sorry about that. I should have at least—look, I can drop by today and just try to fix things.”
“Are you sure? You really don’t have to. Don’t you need to be at the hospital?”
You started going around your room now, trying to gather the scattered papers and files that you’ll need. It’s a good thing you woke up early so you still have time to prepare for work. “My boyfriend’s mother is the one watching over him today so I have the day off.”
“And your injury? How is it?”
Your eyes landed on the new bottles of medicine sitting on your bedside table.
“Better. I’m feeling so much better.”
You heard Taeyong sigh in relief over the phone. “Thank god. We were so worried about that. Well, you really don’t need to go, but if you have time, I guess doing it today won’t hurt. It will help us a lot.”
A small smile tugged at your lips now and you switched the phone over to your other ear as you started arranging your bag. “Thank you so much for being understanding. I need a distraction anyway. I’d rather work than stay home alone… Thanks for not firing me.”
That made him laugh a little. “I’ll tell the boys that you’re coming over. Oh, and be careful on your drive here. The roads are a little bit slippery today because of the snow.”
“I will, thank you. I’ll be there by 9.”
******* “Noona!”
You have barely finished arranging your materials on your desk when the door to the room burst open and ushered an anxious-looking Jisung inside. You looked up quickly at him, only barely catching Chenle wobbling with his crutch before your vision of the entrance was blocked by Jisung’s tall frame. His hair looked swept up as if he ran and there was a slight flush staining his cheeks. He stopped right in front of you, stopping just in time for him not to topple you over.
“Hey, Jisung how are—” You tried to give him a smile but he was quick enough to grab your hands between his.  
“Are you back? Are you really back for real?” He pressed now, eyes wide as he tried to bend over to look closely at you. He looked like a puppy, the only missing thing being a wagging tail to complete the look. You couldn’t help the brief laugh that passed over you as you tried to calm him down.
“I am. For the day, yes. Sorry I missed so many of your sessions.”
“We thought you left us,” Jisung continued, his lower lip protruding just a bit. Just then, Chenle had finally reached the two of you, a slightly embarrassed look on his face. This is actually the first time you saw him again since the day the two of you had your accident and you’re glad to see him healthy despite his broken leg.
“Hi, Chenle. How are you?”
The boy scratched the back of his head and looked away slightly. “Fine… I’m sorry, noona. I wasn’t able to visit you when you stayed with us. I’m really really sorry about what happened in the forest.”
You tried to give him a reassuring smile and freed one of your hands from Jisung’s hold to ruffle his hair. The action seemed to have calmed him down a little because he finally looked at you again, a small apologetic smile on his own lips.
“Don’t worry about it. It’s not your fault. But be careful next time, okay?”
“Are you going to be our tutor again, noona?” Jisung pressed once more and you turned your attention back to him. To be honest, you’re still not sure how your schedule will turn out after this, but you couldn’t really bear to break the poor boy’s heart at the moment.
“Yes… I’m here to teach your big brothers today for their tests though. We’ll have to schedule you and Chenle’s lessons again. Is that alright?”
A brief look of disappointment flashed on his face but he was quick enough to pick it up. Jisung smiled and gave your hand a squeeze.
“Okay. We can wait. It’s good you are back, Jaemin-hyung was so—”
“Yah, don’t hog her by yourself. You’ll scare her away.”
A new voice made the three of you look back to the doorway. Haechan smiled at your little group as he strolled casually into the room followed by Jeno and Jaemin. The three of them joined your crowd and you felt Jisung finally let go of your hand as he stepped away to go over to his brothers’ side.
“Hi. Sorry, I only returned now. Taeyong told me that you—”
You weren’t able to finish what you wanted to say as Haechan gently stopped you mid-sentence. He leaned his head to the side, eyes briefly scanning you from head to toe. Unlike Jisung, he looked calm and only barely excited.
“It’s fine. We knew you’ll come back. How are you?”
“Oh… I’m good. My head is better. I haven’t had the chance to thank all of you for taking care of me when I was here.”
“How about your boyfriend?” It was Jeno who asked this time and you quickly turned to him to address his question. Your eyes briefly slipped to Jaemin who was standing behind him before you could even speak though, and for a moment you had the impression that Jeno was shielding him—or blocking him from you. You blinked a little bit in confusion, wondering if it was just your imagination that was making you think that way.
“He’s still… still unconscious,” your smile dropped a little but you tried your best to keep your voice casual. “We’re getting more tests for him. His doctor said that he isn’t showing bad signs at least.”
“I’m so sorry to hear about him,” Haechan said with compassion and you gave him a grateful look. Your gaze settled on Jaemin again, however, who for some reason had barely looked at you since he came into the room. You know that he can be quiet and reserved at times, but there is something in the air around him that makes you slightly worried. He’s so still, but the way he carries himself makes it seem like he’s so strung up at the same time. It also doesn’t help that Jeno seems to be almost pushing him back from view.
“Hi Jaemin… How are you?” You tried to gently ask him to make sure that he is okay. He didn’t look at you at first, but when he finally did, you felt yourself freeze a little. His eyes looked dark and almost emotionless when he met yours and there were shadows under them as if he hadn't slept properly for days. He didn’t even answer and just simply stared, his gaze blank and accusing at the same time.
Haechan casually glanced over his brother and chuckled. “Our Jaeminie here has been sick for the past couple of days so he’s a little out of it. But he’s going to be fine now,” he put a hand over the other’s shoulder and gave it a slight squeeze as if to calm him down. “Right, Jaemin? We’ll try our best to go to class today since noona is finally back, hmm?”
Jaemin, however, didn’t even seem to hear him. He continued staring at you the same way that kept you pinned on your spot.
“Are you leaving again?” he finally asked and you almost felt goosebumps rise on your skin. It didn’t sound like a question… but more of a threat. You swallowed.
“I’m going to have to arrange my schedule till things get better…” you answered carefully, as if you’re navigating dark waters. That didn’t seem to cut it for him, unfortunately.
“So you’re not leaving. Forever?”
You blinked. To be honest, you’ve been thinking of quitting and just finishing the rest of the month if things didn’t improve, but you don’t think that’s the right answer to give at the moment.
“No… not for now,” you finally managed to say. You watched as Jaemin seemed to visibly relax, his stiff shoulders loosening under Haechan’s grip. He didn’t say anything after that, but he at least looked away, seemingly more satisfied with your words.
“Great. I think we should get to work,” Haechan broke the silence and looked around the room as if the tension you were feeling was just something only you could feel. He nodded towards Chenle and Jisung then. “You guys go back to your own classes. You’ll have your share of noona once it’s your turn.” He then glanced at you, smile still in place. “Should we start then?”
You nodded. “Is Renjun still not back?”
“Not yet. He’s going to be here tomorrow though,” Jeno answered as he took his seat on one of the desks.
“I see…”
Haechan also found his spot, but not before you’ve noticed him urging Jaemin to do the same. Playfully, he took the pencil you’ve arranged on the desk and started tapping it against the wood of the table.
“Don’t worry. We’ll tell him you’re back. I’m sure he can’t wait to have his lessons again~”
******* You looked over the window for the third time in the last fifteen minutes and sighed. The day had been busy with you trying to catch up on the boys’ lessons that you barely even noticed the state of the weather outside. When you finally did, it took you by surprise when you saw how much of the ground was covered by snow—one look at it told you that it is at least a feet deep by now. Your first instinct was to try and maneuver your car out of the lot before your tires get entirely buried in it, but then you remembered that you promised to wait for Taeyong to come back before leaving the manor. The butler requested for you to temporarily watch over the manor while he tries to do some last minute errands back in the city, but it’s been two hours since he originally promised to come back. You eyes glanced at your watch now, then back at the quickly darkening view outside. 
“...severe snowstorm has blocked some of the main roads in the city at the moment. Expect heavy traffic and don’t forget to drive safely.”
You turned to the television now to catch the last of the rambling dialogue of the reporter about the weather. You’ve been debating on whether to call Taeyong or not to check on him, but you didn’t want to seem impatient to go home when you only really wanted to make sure if he’s safe. From the looks of it, he’s stuck somewhere because of the hale, too.
You were on your way to get your phone from your bag to at least try to shoot him a message when you suddenly heard it ring. Getting it just in time, you almost sighed in relief when you saw his number there. You quickly took it and went over to the window to answer it to make sure you get some proper signal.
“Hello? Taeyong?”
“Hey. Finally. I’ve been trying to call you for the last hour, thank god it finally connected.”
“Oh, sorry, my phone’s in my bag. I think the signal’s getting bad because of the snowstorm. Where are you? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, about that, I’m still stuck in town. The traffic’s so bad here because a section of the main road is blocked. Road maintenance is supposed to come thirty minutes ago but I think there’s a delay because there are other roads they are working on.”
Your gaze drifted back to the television where scenes of the same blocked avenues were being flashed. “Yeah… the news says the same.  Are you safe though?”
“I am. I’m really sorry for making you wait. I’d tell you to drive back and not wait for me anymore but I don’t think you’ll also make it home in time with all this traffic going on. I don’t think it’s going to be safe. Do you mind waiting for a little bit more? I’ll tell you once the roads are better.”
You thought it over quickly, a frown settling on your face. You really want to go home, but he’s right. There’s no point in trying to drive back if you’ll only find yourself stuck in the roads for hours. Not being a big fan of night driving yourself, you can already imagine the stress waiting for you if you add a snowstorm to the mix. As much as you wanted to leave, you’re left with no choice, at least for the moment.
 “I can… I’ll just wait for you, I guess. Do you want me to do anything here while you’re gone? Dinner for the boys?”
“Oh no, no, you don’t need to do that, that’s not part of your job,” Taeyong sounded abashed when he said that. You stepped away from the window then and took a seat by the fireplace that Jeno started earlier. Half of your concentration was on the news which has now shifted to a different set of reports also caused by the snowstorm. “They’ll know when to go down and eat. Don’t worry about them. Where are they right now?”
“Ah, I think they went back to their rooms? I did tell them earlier that I’ll try to wait for you.”
“I see. Yes, I think that’s better. Don’t worry, I’ll keep you updated. If things don’t get better, I think I’ll have no other choice but find a hostel here and wait for the weather to calm down. You can stay there and just ask for help from any of them. You can stay in the same room just in case.”
You didn’t quickly react to the offer. Instead, your eyes flickered to the doorway of the room before refocusing your attention back to the conversation. It’s not like you have anything against spending the night again at the manor—you’ve done it before, after all—but it’s honestly not really something you’re comfortable to do again. Maybe it’s because you’ve never really been okay with overstaying at strangers’ houses but your gut feel is also telling you right now that it shouldn’t be your top option regardless of the situation you are in.
Still, you didn’t want to come off rude to Taeyong, not when he is only being kind to offer you temporary shelter while being stuck in the middle of nowhere himself. So instead, you went against your initial doubts and offered him your thanks in return. It’s just Plan B that he’s proposing after all. 
“I will. Keep me updated though if you need anything you think I can help with.”
“Thank you and I will. I have to go now though. Please make yourself at home. I’ll try to call again after an hour.”
“Okay. Take care.”
You put your phone down now with a worried frown as you heard the line drop. You couldn’t believe this is happening the first day you got back to work but it’s not like you can really blame anyone for it. The only good thing is that you’re sure Jaehyun is being taken care of right now so that is at least one thing off your shoulders. You didn’t really need to rush anywhere, not especially to a vacant home. Leaning back against your seat, you tried your best to relax as your gaze travelled around the room once again. You deliberated on sending a text to your mother-in-law to tell her about your situation but decided against it, not wanting to worry her more. You sighed. For now, you guess you didn’t have any other choice but to wait.
You did try to distract yourself by watching the news for a few more minutes before finally giving up on it. With resignation, you picked yourself up from your seat again and turned the television off. For a moment you simply stood in the middle of the room, trying to figure out what to do with your time when your gaze settled on the door again. Everyone retreated to their own rooms after they finished with their lessons so it means the house is pretty much yours for exploring if you wanted to. You toyed with the idea for a little bit, before finally resigning yourself to it. It’s not like there really is anything else left for you to do, and Taeyong did say you can make yourself feel at home if you wanted to. With a sigh, you finally turned on your heels to leave the room and peered silently into the hallway. It was deserted as expected, but still your eyes travelled left and right to check if there’s anyone out and about at this hour. It was only after you made sure that you were alone when you finally allowed yourself to step into the corridor.
Of course, you have a plan. You’re pretty much sure that checking out the rooms on the first floor is acceptable since it’s where you’ve been rotating your classes so you’re going to stick to those areas. You remember finding a library there once and you focused on finding your way to it to maybe check out some of the books in the collection. 
It did take you about five minutes to finally find the place you were looking for. For some reason, the sections in the manor always confuse you no matter how many times you try to memorize each one, probably because of how big and similar-looking they are on the outside. You’ve already tried four doors when you were finally welcomed by the familiar-looking bookshelves at the fifth one. You sighed and gave one quick look around the room before slipping yourself inside after making sure that you’re alone.
There will probably never be a time when you won’t find yourself fascinated by anything in this grand home. If the architecture of the mansion is not enough to convince anyone how rich the family is, their book collection is enough to assure that at the very least. You’ve only ever taken a quick glimpse of it once during one of your lessons with the boys, but one look of the titles in their shelves is enough to make any literature major excited. You looked at the floor to ceiling collection now, your fingers gently running over the spines of the books you could reach with a small smile on your face.
You were about to check out the rest of the collection on the other side of the wall when something in the middle of the room caught your attention. You didn’t really catch it at first because of the shadows that concealed it when you first came in, but you could pretty much discern the outline of a blanket covered standee now from where you stood. You frowned. Taking careful steps, you closed the distance towards it to try and figure out what exactly it is that you’re seeing.
A closer look revealed it to be an easel covered with white cloth. You could see the outline of the canvas where the blanket falls over it while shadows of colors peeked out into the thin fabric from the surface it was covering. How odd… you knew that Renjun had a different art room for his paintings so to see this now here in the middle of the library seems uncanny.
You didn’t know how long you remained standing in front of it, too. You know you should have walked away—after all, the white cloth hiding it away from plain view means whatever is on that canvas is not meant for everyone’s eyes to see, but you simply couldn’t tear yourself away from it. It’s as if there was a silent force asking you to pull that cloth to reveal what’s underneath, the inclination so strong that you could almost hear its voice breathing down next to your ear, unrelenting until you do what it says.
The next thing you know, you had your hand attached to one end of the fabric. You stared at it now, wondering last minute if you should go ahead or not. You swallowed and glanced around one last time around the room. If you’re alone… it wouldn’t hurt if you could take a peek, right? Nobody will know. You just have to see, then cover it back again. Before you could even think about it too much, your arm was finally moving on its own as it gently tugged at the covering. You watched as it fell gently on the floor, like a bodiless ghost melting into the shadows on the ground.
Your eyes couldn’t make out what you were seeing at first. The dim lighting of the room wasn’t helping at all, but you were sure that it was a woman’s silhouette that was staring back at you from the canvas. Colors swirled around her, like some unknown mass trying to drag her back into unknown depths. Shapes and tones jumped from the picture, but her form stood out from the rest, gracefully twisted as if she was in the middle of trying to fight and succumb to it at the same time. You frowned. Taking a step closer towards it, you tried to study its details under what little illumination the lamps above afforded you.
That’s when it all happened simultaneously. Your heart stopped beating the same time your eyes widened as they finally focused on what’s in front of them. It’s as if the ground suddenly vanished from underneath your feet and you were falling, falling, deep into the abyss despite your body being frozen in fear and shock.
You know this painting. You’ve seen it before. It was the same one by Renjun, the one that you saw on your first day working in the manor.
But it was different now. Instead of the unfinished state that caught your attention before, everything about the picture now is in sharp focus. The lines on the woman’s nude body, the hands—which you thought were simply dark swirls dragging her back—and her face twisted beautifully in pleasure and madness stared back at you like a nightmare.
But it was not those which truly shook you to your core. It’s the realization that it was your own face in the portrait that was staring back at you, silently screaming for you to run away.
You stumbled back in shock. Your chest felt tight as you tried to grasp for air while your hands fumbled to find something to hold on to keep you from crashing on the ground. Before you could even take another step, however, something hard hit your back and you felt strong arms wrap around your waist like a vice. You have barely realized what was happening when you felt someone lean over your shoulder, lips pressing against the shell of your ear.
“Isn’t it beautiful? You’re the perfect muse, don’t you think?” Renjun asked softly as he pressed a gentle kiss to your temple.
******* You didn’t know how long you stayed frozen in his embrace. For a brief moment you thought you were dreaming again until you felt his arms slowly tighten around your waist. As if a jolt of electricity shocked you, you immediately turned to push him away as you scrambled to put some distance between the two of you.
Renjun didn’t seem the least bothered when your eyes finally focused on him. He remained on his spot, his gaze on you unwavering. You, meanwhile, were shaking from head to toe, the vision of the painting still branded vividly in your head.
“Renjun—what’s this?” you managed to stutter as you pointed at the artwork in the middle of the room. You couldn’t even spare to look at it again while he merely gave it a casual glance.
“It’s you. I’ve been working on it for a long time. I was about to show it to you but it seems like you couldn’t wait for it yourself.”
You felt nauseous. A part of your rational mind was slowly losing it as you tried to process his answer. Something's not right. Something is so terribly wrong.
“Why—why did you do this?”
Renjun simply stared at you and leaned his head a little bit to the side as if he was only mildly curious of your reaction. Your stomach turned even before hearing his answer.
“You said it’s beautiful.”
“This is not right—!”
“I came home because they said you were leaving for good,” he continued speaking softly, effectively cutting you from what you were about to say. The hairs on the back of your neck stood on end and you took another step back as you watched him get close to his artwork. You watched in horror as his thin fingers lovingly ran over the corners of the canvas. “Jaemin almost lost it… It’s a good thing I got here on time.”
And just like that, everything seemed to have clicked into place. The glances, the touches, the words that seemed to have a different undercurrent under them… they weren’t just fragments of your imagination. Every little thing that has gnawed at you from the inside came into crystal clear focus and you felt your knees go weak from the weight of it all. It took every fiber of your being to try and keep yourself steady now, your legs moving on their own as they took small backward steps away from the boy staring at you now with dead eyes. You couldn’t breathe, but it was the last words he told you that finally snapped you to run.
“I don’t think you’ve realized it yet. But no, you cannot leave. Ever.”
You didn’t know where you got the energy for it but in seconds you were flying out of that room and running blindly down the darkened corridors. Your blood pumped noisily in your ears and your chest felt like it was going to split from the sudden exertion you put on it, but you didn’t stop, not even looking back as you tried to put as much distance between you and the library. You didn’t even know where you were going. All you’re focused on is to find the exit and leave the house as soon as possible.
A loud bang that sounded off to your right startled you and you screamed, the force of your shock making you whip around and almost lose your balance. Before you could even hit the floor, however, a pair of hands caught you and you immediately turned, grasping at the chest of your rescuer.
You froze. Haechan smiled down at you as he tried to steady you on your feet.
“Haechan,” you gasped as you took fistfuls of his shirt and tried to shake him in your panic. “Renjun—he’s—please, help me. He’s after me—” you gasped out, almost out of your wits. You’re on the verge of a total breakdown that it almost escaped you, the way he simply smiled down on your shaking form. It was only when you felt one of his hands gently caress the top of your head that reality slapped you in the face again. You suddenly stopped struggling in his hold, pupils shaking as you watched him study your features lovingly.
“Shh… it’s fine. I got you,” he whispered and you could swear ice pricked you from the inside. A slight movement to the right made you turn your head and you saw Jaemin lean casually against the banister of the stairs, his face serene. He gave you one quick look before a gentle smile finally lit up his features.
“Has it started?” he asked and you felt Haechan’s hold on you tighten.
“It has.”
You didn’t struggle. It was as if any trace of fight you had left you in that moment and you let your hands fall limply on your sides. Haechan also loosened his grip on you and you stared at the two boys blankly, your chest heaving as if fighting for air. They didn’t move from their spots and simply followed you with their eyes as if relishing the fear and realization flashing in your face.
Trapped.
You’re trapped.
You’ve always been.
You didn’t even realize that your legs had started moving again on their own as the pieces of the puzzle started to fall together in your mind. You were only shaken from it when your back finally hit the front door, the cold metal of the knob pressing against your spine. Jaemin and Haechan remained on their spots still, even as you blindly reached out for it from behind.
You were expecting it to be locked, so you were a little bit surprised when you felt it give way under your hand when you tried to turn it open. Just before you could even entertain the idea of escaping, however, any trace of hope you had quickly died as you turned and came face to face with Jeno standing right in front of the entrance. He didn’t look the least surprised seeing you there, as if he was waiting for you in the first place.
You eyes took in his calm countenance before slowly moving to stare downwards at what he was holding by his side. Your gaze locked on it in fear, and that’s when the flight response in you flared up again.
Jeno’s hunting rifle shone dully in the light of the entryway, his pale fingers wrapped on its handle.
“There’s really only one place you can run, noona, but I won’t advise it,” he said evenly and you felt your blood freeze in your veins.
“After all, no matter where you hide, I’ll still find you in that forest.”
It happened all at once. You broke into a run, your body screaming at you to go faster as you heard gunshots pierce the air.
---
CHAPTER 7
A/N: Good lord, I wasn’t expecting I’d finish this today but I got one large iced coffee and well... things happened. Anyway, enjoy! Let’s hope the format won’t mess up this time. T.T Finally, all hell broke loose~ <3
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some-dr-writings · 4 years ago
Text
SDR2 guys x intimidating looking but sweet S/O
Hajime Hinata:
·       You had been Hajime’s best friend for as long as he could remember. You were always so smart and the top in your class. Truthfully Hajime expected you to be invited to Hope’s Peak, but… you were always rambunctious. As smart as you were, you didn’t care for rules that existed outside ones of safety. You were labeled the school delinquent, getting into fights, breaking most rules for the sake of breaking them, doing whatever you could to get a reaction from others, all the while smiling and laughing away having the time of your life.
·       “Ah! Hajime! That’s amazing!” “Y/N!?” You scooped him into your arms, lifting off his feet, spinning around and around. “MY boy, going to HOPE’S PEAK ACADEMY! This is amazing!” Suddenly your spinning came to a stop, stomping a foot on the ground to do so. “Hajime. Hope’s Peak is far, so you’ll be moving right? If that’s the case, you better text me every day! Okay, you don’t have to if you don’t want too, but at least keep me informed of the big stuff like how your first day was or the school festival or at least the sports day! Or, OR! If you’d like, maybe I could move with you, somewhere close to the school and I’ll just get a job in the area so you could just talk to me in person! I would visit, but even by train it’s a two-day trip and I’d probably get board at some point and get kicked off, and there’s also studying for school or work or whatever I do.” A light pink dusted Hajime’s cheeks, feeling a bit flustered at how excited you were, still effortlessly him closely, high off the ground. He swore his heart began to race seeing your absolutely beaming smile which seemed to shine brighter than the sun to him.
·       When with his friends he’d speak of you often, not to the point of annoyance, just enough for them to know he clearly missed you. From how he described you, you seemed to be the sweetest, most wholesome person in existence despite being a bit rowdy. So when Kazuichi caught Hajime holding hands and appearing to be going on a date with a person covered in scars exposed by your unbuttoned shirt, haired dyed a bright blond, scary tattoos, spiked jacket and boots, even having a mask covering you face, nobody believed him till Hajime walked in on the conversation, saying that was you. After that they insisted on meeting you, wanting to know such a seemingly contrasting person existed, and when they did meet you, they gave Hajime their approval, even if he didn’t want or need it.
   Izuru Kamakura:
·       Many things Izuru found boring, but if he had to choose one thing he found more boring than anything else, it’d have to be the baseless rumors surrounding you, his partner, all because you had a scary face. It was so ridiculous he couldn’t even entertain the idea of you secretly being the heir of a yakuza gang or something so off the wall even he couldn’t recall. Whenever he heard such rumors as he walked down Hope’s Peak’s halls, he thought he may just fall asleep from how tiring it was, thinking about the mental gymnastics people had to go through to even come to such conclusions.
·       It was another day and again he heard of your imaginary exploits of having killed a man in cold blood for money or some such and instantly he just felt exhausted. He continued to walk till he stopped before a door and knocked. “Oh, hey Izu-baby. What brings you here?” “… I just found myself here.” You chuckled, simply opening the door, taking your boyfriend’s hand and leading him in.
·       You promptly plopped him into a seat, going off to get something, Izuru had the chance to examine the many brushes, hair products and hair accessories spread out on the counter. There were even several sticky notes on the edges of the large vanity mirror, neat writing noting some appointments you had. Seems like he had come in when you were cleaning between appointments. “I found a new brush and I think it should work well with your thick long hair.” You placed your a hand on one of the back rest corners of the chair, leaning a little over him, smiling as you held said brush before him. “Then test it.”
·       You giddily collected his hair, your touch occasionally grazing across his skin. Your hands though covered in cuts, slightly dyed from all your hair styling work, and probably tired from having worked for almost six hours straight according to the sticky notes, they still were ever so gentle, making sure to not get caught on or pull any knots. Then you began to brush, starting from the bottom and working your way up. “Izuru, you have a few split ends, and it’s been a while, mind if I give you a light trim while I have you here?” “You have an appointment in forty-three minuets.” “Hmm… Yeah, I can get this done in time.” Once you reached the top you gave his hair a few extra strokes from top to bottom, making sure you got everything. “Oh, I also found a new shampoo which can help your hair. It’s still so dull, but at this point it might be because of your diet since I can’t seem to find anything that can work for you. Have you been eating? Has the staff been testing you on talents again and not feeding you?” “No.” You were going to ponder for a moment, to try figuring out what your boyfriend’s problem could be when said boyfriend placed a hand on your cheek, lightly pulling you beside him. Closing his eyes, he leaned in and kissed you on the cheek. “You’re so exhausted you forgot we spoke of this very subject yesterday.” “Huh?” Your entire face flushed a bright red, still unused to Izuru’s sparce displays of affection. Then to your confusion he pulled you onto his lap. “I-Izu-baby?” “You are taking a nap.” For some reason in that moment of seeing you so flustered he recalled the rumors. The thought of you even harming a fly was laughable, you were the absolute sweetest, kindest, caring person he had ever met. Holding you close he simply leaned into you, thinking you could both use a nap together.
   Nagito Komaeda:
·       You made your own rumors. The ones about you secretly being an assassin, you started it. The one about how you once were an international thief, you did it. The one about you selling drugs, that one was actually an accident, you were just getting a friend their pain meds, but you spread about a few more stories like it not long after. Why purposefully spread rumors many would wonder… well… there were two reasons.
·       The first, you found most people annoying and simply didn’t want to deal with them, content with your small, very close friend group. It was the perfect way to get people to back off so you wouldn’t have to deal with them in their first place. You also found some fun in seeing people run from you from your presents alone, made you feel like some cartoon super villain which you found quite amusing.
·       The second reason… You had always told your boyfriend the first one, but to his confusion, you’d always avoid telling him the other reason. Nagito knew you’d had to have your reasons for not telling him, but… well you were his partner, of course he was going to worry a little even if it seemed you knew what you were doing.
·       But he could ignore it no longer when you took the blame for him. Nagito came up with a plan to blow up a building, forcing the exams to be delayed so his classmates could have more time to prepare for them… and you took for the blame for it, being expelled for a time, but not forever. You couldn’t even stay on your dorm on campus, winding up staying in some cheap hotel paid by the school.
·       “Why did you do it?” “Eh, Nagito?” “WHY! Why did you take the blame for me!? I was trying to get you more time so you could show off in glory, but now you’re stuck here. Why did you do it?” Nagito was always so calm and composed, likely from facing disaster after disaster caused by his bad luck, but he was actually troubled, he was upset, but not even at himself like he always did thinking himself trash, no, he was legitimately upset with you. “… Normally people greet their partner with a ‘hello’ or something.” The last thing you were expected to be greeted by your first morning exiled from school was your boyfriend in such a state. “I- No. Y/N, tell me, why?” “… I…” You couldn’t tear your eyes away from him, this new side you had never even thought existed, yet you also couldn’t bear to look at him either so instead you looked to his feet. “I don’t want to lie to you, but… I don’t want to tell you the truth either. But! What I can tell you, is that this is fine, I chose this, I wanted this. So, you don’t have to worry about me, this just means I have even more time to develop my talent.” You tried giving him a smile, but it just ended up strained seeing that didn’t placate him. W-why? He always saw everything ultimates did was amazing and respected even the worst of decisions, yet… he was mad, and sad, and so many other things you couldn’t pinpoint not being able to bring yourself to study his expression for long.
·       “No, this is not fine. What you did is not helping you. This is only a detriment. I-I-I, I just can’t understand! I can’t understand why. How did this turn out so wrong?” “… the other reason.” “Huh?” You spoke so quietly, it was but a whisper, Nagito had just barely caught it. “The other reason… It’s why I NEED a bad reputation, not just something I want for the fun of it.” You sighed, preparing for the inevitable Nagito calling himself trash and you trying to comfort him song and dance. “You’re such a volatile wild card. I never know what you’ll do next. Nagito, you literally tried to blow up a building with people inside, I know your luck probably would have saved them or something or you assumed the ultimates inside would save the day, but… that’s not healthy! You’ve been through so much and need help. I, I want to help you, but I just don’t know what to do. So… to me, the best I can do is try to protect you.” Even as his eyes widened, realizing what happened, you continued. “With a bad reputation, rumors of all sorts, both extreme and little, it can be expected that I can do anything without it being out of character. I can take on anyone’s bad actions and call it my own and all will believe it… Even if I can’t protect you from the insanity that is our life, the very least I can do is protect you from yourself, the consequences of your actions. I can’t get you to at last see yourself as decent, I can’t stop your luck from torturing you, this… this is all I can think of for what I could ever do for you… it’s the only kind of affection I can give without you saying or thinking you’re unworthy of it… though I guess I don’t even have that now, but… I don’t know, maybe this was-”
·       …
·       He hugged you. He didn’t know what to say. He took in everything you said, yet his mind was just blank. He had so much to say, yet he just could… All he could do was just nuzzle into you, one who was just so sweet and kind, and… he needed to better for you, Nagito at least new that for sure.
   Imposter:
·       Imposter wondered how they ever were lucky enough to find a partner like you. They never thought they’d find anyone who could get them to see themselves as a person even without the disguises, let alone a whole class at one point. Yes, they still disguised themselves, but when they were just with you they felt okay to not keep the make-up, wigs and costumes. They were just… whoever they were without being someone else. Their own identity was something they still struggled with but working on it with your helped.
·       Individuals who could stay true to themselves no matter what were people they respected highly, that was probably what got them to fall for you in the first place. No matter who avoided you, the children who cried from seeing your large, buff figure, no matter the sports nuts who insisted on you joining their team, you always were the shy Super High School Level Flower Shop Keep who loved exercising.
·       When they first met you, they were masquerading as Beyakuya Togami, not exactly the most sociable of personalities, so they thought they scared you away. When first meeting a person you didn’t speak much, instead you’d gift flowers and spoke through flower language. “Oh, well… there’s a lot you can say with flowers. I’ve just always liked them. I just like being outside, so I exercise a lot! But then I got toned, and already being on the bulkier side some people find me scary… Ah, but if I give the children flowers, they usually stop crying… unless a bee comes by, then they cry again.” Even though you were so soft spoken when you did speak, it was still rather intimidating. There was just so much power in it.
·       They rather enjoyed how you’d decorate them with your beloved plants, whether it be placing them behind their ear, in their hair, or in their breast pocket. They also adored each bouquet you gave. Very quickly their whole dorm room smelled of fast-food and a light floral perfume. They pressed and kept every last flower, preserving them all even the ones from when you first met.
·       You were so open and honest, even though you tried hiding it they knew when you had a crush on them- or well Beyakuya… They had no identity outside of whoever they were impersonating, but… the thought made their heart ache. So, when you came up to them with giant bouquet filled with tulips, purple roses, red roses, alstroemerias, and baby’s breath they could easily see even as you hid it behind your back, a bright blush on your cheeks, they knew what was happening, and rejected you before you could give them the flowers and confess. You hugged the bouquet close as they explained their situation, and even after, you still held out the flowers to them. “So, your identity is more complex than I knew, but all our time together still happened. And if you change identities, it’ll be like a change in color. Definitely different, even changing the meaning, but the base is still the same, you’ll still remember our time together even as someone else.” And since that moment, no matter what came, you never left them.
   Gundham Tanaka:
·       The moment Gundham met the Super High School Level Vet, Gundham fell head over heels for them. They were an intimidating, brutish, scarred from battles past, every last feature was terrifying, their features sharp, everything about them commanded the respect of all, even getting his Dark Devas to be weary of them at first sight.
·       Caring for animals was a tricky job, it often involved getting scratches and bites, but you also needed to be patient and kind. You needed to be respected but also not appear hostile. A balance you embodied, looking fierce, yet you were so gentle and sensitive to others around you.
·       The pair of you always spent time looking after his many animals, tending to any injuries or illnesses they possibly could have gotten.
·       You also tended to Gundham Tanaka himself, much to his flustered, blushing protest. “I have no such injures of which you speak!” “Tanaka, you can’t even hold a pencil you hand is hurting so bad. Please let me at least look at it.” He kept refusing till some students came by asking if he were alright, fearing the scary looking person who kept looming around him all day. “Pathetic! Of such a low level you can’t even decern one’s true nature!” Then he stomped off till finally he found you. “My Emperor!” “Hey Tana-” “I seek thy aid, for only one of your caliber could even remotely stand a chance of resisting my poisoned skin, let alone tent to the curse that plagues this mortal form!” You just silently stared at him for a moment before you started fussing over him, clutching his jacket since you wanted to hug him. “What happened!? Did it get worse!? Tell me EVERYTHING about how you feel! Do you think it’s infected!? How does it hurt!? Does it sting or burn, or what!?” Gundham himself began to panic, unsure as to how to calm and put you at ease, never before seeing you worried to the point of tears forming in the corners of your eyes! However, you did quickly settle down, getting serious tending to his wound…
·       And even as you did so, you avoided touching him. If you needed to apply ointment, you’d use a q-tip, you’d do anything you could to not touch him… Even you tending to him sent his heart racing, showing vulnerability, he was used to giving the care, not the other way around. He felt vulnerable in a way, he showed you he was hurting, but you were so gentle with him, so aware of him, even stopping and giving him a moment to pause and collect himself.
·       Someone so attentive and understanding… He groaned, embarrassed at how giddy, and excited, and nervous even the mere thought of you made him.
   Kazuichi Soda:
·       He was terrified of you at first, even going so far as to actively avoid you. But then he met you. The moment he did so he was so confused as to how he found you scary? After actually taking to you, he found you, looks and all so adorable! He’d gush to anyone and everyone about how kind and amazing and sweet you were. He’d defend you to the death if a person even made the smallest negative comment about you, much to your complete embarrassment.
·       After becoming your boyfriend Kazuichi would always hang around you, cooing over everything that was you, shattering any intimidating precents you had with the man hugging your arm, speaking in such a sickeningly sweet tone with sparkling eyes.
·       Feeling like the world was against you, Kazuichi spent all his time with you to make up for it. No matter how many times you told him he didn’t have to he insisted on giving you all the affection you so rightly deserve!
·       When you weren’t embarrassed by the man’s antics you’d be just as affectionate in return. As he tinkered on whatever you’d hug him from behind, sighing, and nuzzling into the nape of his neck, tickling him, distracting him from his work. He’d giggle, giddy out of his mind at having someone so sweet and adorable love him almost as much as he loved you!
·       If Kazuichi caught even one person giving you a funny look, he’d just hug and snuggle you with a pout, glaring at others.
·       “Kazu, you don’t have to defend me from everyone. I know I’m not exactly the most approachable looking.” “What!? No! You are gorgeous! Adorable! Beautiful! Don’t self-deprecate yourself!” “I’m not, I just… I know you’re affectionate, but you don’t have to be so protective, I appreciate it, but you don’t have to do this every time. I just want you to enjoy yourself not feel like you have to be my knight in shining armor or something.” “Well, I can’t enjoy myself if others are being jerks!” Kazuichi would never admit it to you, but he felt guilty. He knew what it was like to be bullied, for others to make comments. He also felt guilty for judging you so much before meeting you. he was once scared with a person he instantly fell in love with after finally talking to them. He just wanted to make up for that, he wanted to say he was sorry… And feeling you hug him, thank him for being your knight, he was reminded all over why he loved such a sweet person so much, and he was determined to give you all the love he could to make up from being so cruel before.
   Teruteru Hanamura: part 1
·       Teru had a rather interesting relationship with the new delivery person. You weren’t mean, but your whole aura was rather intimidating with your cold demeanor and with how muscular you were. Yet of all people, you were warm and kind to him. You merrily chat about your day, or about anything. You’d get a laugh out of his flirting, even try and miserably fail at flirting back, something Teru found endlessly endearing. Whatever made Teru special he honestly didn’t care, just enjoying your company so much.
·       After your hard work, well hard for most but for you it was just seemingly light stretches, Teru would cook a hearty meal for you to keep you going for the rest of the day! It was his favorite thing to do before opening the restaurant, just that single quiet moment of enjoying a meal with you.
·       Teru could find something attractive about anyone, but with you… well you were certainly attractive, a stallion, a ten out of ten to him, but he found he so quickly grew feelings for you. True a person’s personality or voice could be sexy but there was something different about it with you. But whatever it was, didn’t matter to him, all he knew was that he just wanted to spend more time with you, and whatever you did together didn’t matter to him, as long as you were together.
·       You sighed, taking another bite. “Is something the matter?” “I’m just going to miss this.” “What?” You didn’t even glance his way, simply continuing to enjoy your meal. “Yeah, I gotta move soon. I’ve actually stayed here much longer than I should, but… I just couldn’t resist sticking around longer ‘cause of you… again.” “Ah, well… that’s too bad. It’s been rather fun having you around.” “It’ll be alright. I know you’ll be fine without me. Actually, I’d like to ask you to make a promise to forget me.” “Forget you!? How in tarn- AH I- Ahem- How could I do that!?” You simply smiled and laughed, just as you did before. You placed a hand on his cheek, gently caressing him with your thumb. “You’re the only person I can call a friend. I know you can keep this promise, that’s just the kind of person you are. Sure, you’re a bit raunchy, but you truly are kind and care for others. You could never let me feel guilty about leaving you behind.” Teru was silent for a moment, just taking in what you said. “When will you be leaving?” “Uh… I should say tomorrow, but I’m thinking a week.” A week? Teru could work with that!
·       “Please go on a date with me!” “… Huh?” In complete bafflement you just let Teruteru take your hands into his, a determined glint in his eyes. “If you’ll be leaving I want to make the most of the time we have left!” “…oh… uh… o-okay, we could do that.”
·       And so, the week was filled with date after date, going all out with no inhibitions doing anything you could think of from watching a movie to sky diving. Wherever you went Teru always had a packed meal on hand for the pair of you to enjoy. It was honestly the best week of either of your lives. And all too quickly it had already passed you by.
·       Standing on the bridge in the park you stood side by side watching the sun rise. “Well, that’s it, I better get going. I really enjoyed this, just as always. Thank you.” “Now hold on a moment, you can’t go just yet!” He held out a small plastic container to you. “You need a good meal for the road! Don’t know where you’re going, but wherever it is, it’d be a downright shame if I left you hungry along the way!” You simply stared at him for a moment before the softest, most earnest of smiles he had ever seen creased your lips. So tenderly you took the container. “… Some things never change I suppose… At least I know you can still keep that promise.” Then without so much as explaining your strange words, you disappeared as if you never even were there. It was sad for Teru, yet something in him knew he’d see you again, and that thought let him go back to his everyday life as if you never appeared, yet after that life just seemed more lively to him, just like those later years back in Hope’s Peak, though as to why that time seemed livelier he couldn’t quite remember.
  Nekomaru Nidai:
·       Being a rather intimidating looking guy with a heart of gold, Nekomaru took to understanding your situation quickly. Both of you being athletic and getting rather larger builds it just kinda naturally happened.
·       Being the exceedingly kind individual you were others often took advantage of that. Even if you knew it was bad you couldn’t bring yourself to not help others in need for even the smallest of things. This was not something Nekomaru could stand, but finding you standing out in the rain for two days straight was the last straw and the man insisted on training you! You were a bit nervous at first not wanting to take up so much of your best friend’s time, but with some reassurances Nekomaru managed to warm you up, both literally and metaphorically to the training.
·       At some point the training turned into days out, going hiking up mountains, or jogging on beaches, swimming in lakes and doing crossfit, sometimes going out for walks in the night, exploring the city looking for things to do, perhaps some karaoke, some slow dancing by moon light, and yeah you two just ended up dating without meaning too.
·       The pair of you always came up with excuses like the slow dancing was training in balance, no you totally did not want to dance because it was a beautiful night and you could hear ballroom music not far in the distance, no that was totally not it, that’d be dumb… or so you kept telling yourself in these moments so you would not confess to the man fearing he really did only see these outings as training and nothing else.
·       That was till you overheard Nekomaru chatting with his classmates, one of them asking how his ‘date’ with you went and he spoke of your beautiful hike up the mountains, not even batting an eye at their wording. Did… did he not notice, or just not care? Did this mean he liked you too? Or did you mishear? Quickly getting frustrated with this line of thinking you decided to just settle this!
·       “There you are-” “I have something to tell you!” The man silently stood there, just waiting. Okay, this was it, and you took a deep breath. “I… I REALLY LIKE YOU!” “I REALLY LIKE YOU TOO! YOU ARE A CHERISHED FRIEND OF MINE!” “NO, I MEAN- I-I-I LOVE YOU, I THINK!? I DON’T KNOW!” “I LOVE YOU TOO, A LOT IN FACT!” “N-NOT AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU!” “OH YEAH!?” “YES! SO MUCH!”
·       Screaming your feelings for one another was a very common occurrence in the relationship. Even if one of you simply caught sight of the other off in the distance you’d yell ‘I love you’s, which more often than not scared or startled the people around you hearing such loud, booming voices out of nowhere.
·       Life with Nekomaru could be a bit much at times, but it was well worth it for such an amazing guy.
   Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu:
·       You were perfect for him.
·       You didn’t have any reputation really, but wherever you went people knew not to mess with you. Your mere presents not much but if one got close, they could feel this unsettling air about you making them go away. You, being the Super High School Level Street Fighter knew how to defend yourself from most attackers so Fuyuhiko didn’t have to worry about your safety like he’d have to with most others like the majority of his old classmates like Hajime.
·       You were also the most kind and sweet person he had met. Behind closed doors you’d always have you arms open for Fuyuhiko. You’d hold him close, just let him listen to your steady heartbeat and make him feel so safe and secure. His favorite thing was to just cuddle with you.
·       He also liked you being by his side, it served a dual purpose. One: if somehow when meeting some rival gang his reputation didn’t precede him, you were enough to intimidate them at a glance, despite his own baby face. The second and much more important to him, just being with you. True you were well equipped to handle yourself, but you were still human can had come back home to him plenty of times with new scars not from your usual fights, so by your side he and Peko could protect you.
·       He also liked how you were with his subordinates. You were strict, showing no signs of weakness, more than willing to put them in their place should it be needed, yet that didn’t stop you from being kind. You’d do research for days on end trying to find the perfect birthday gift them. You’d train their kids by hand in all ways of fighting, but not for attacking but self-defense, their parents were in a dangerous job so your ‘day job’ of being a children’s fighting instructor helped to place their minds at ease a little.
·       If he could he’d go on for hours singing your praises. You were perfect for him in every single way without a single doubt.
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writefightandflightclub · 4 years ago
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Trial by Fire (Part 1/3) Santiago “Pope” Garcia x GN reader
Summary: You’re finally introducing your new boyfriend to The Boys. It must be intimidating for your guy because, hello? Not only are they literally lethal, as well as infeasibly handsome, but they’re hella protective of you to boot. They want the best for you so, naturally, they make your guy run the gauntlet the whole evening. Santiago, though? Well. Given that he is secretly in love with you? Let’s just say he doesn’t handle the situation very well at all.
Genre / tropes: angst, friends to lovers, love confession.
Author’s note: I wasn’t planning on writing this (in fact I’m writing the opposite, where “Santi has a new girlfriend and you don’t take it well” as a series, loosely based around the 7 deadly sins); but, in the meatime, I wrote this to get back into the swing of things after a lil break. It’s just a quick one, but there will be a second and final part, if you want it! Let me know!
Word count: somehow, 4.4k.
Warnings: language, angst, best friends arguing, Santi being an asshole.
Rating: T
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The boys aren’t being as awful as you had anticipated, at least. For the most part, they’re actually being pretty friendly, and although they’ve transitioned into grilling Dean about every aspect of his life, they are at least listening intently and smiling at his answers. All except for one fucker, of course; and, naturally, surprising no-one, the fucker misbehaving is one (1) Santiago “Pope” Garcia. 
The group - the boys, yourself, and Dean- are huddled comfortably around the blazing warmth of the fire pit in Frankie’s yard. The dancing, oranged flames cut through the dark and cold of the crisp night, as you sit upwind of the smoke on scattered, mis-matched camp chairs.
Whilst the others are evidently enjoying the evening -faces painted with smiles, body language open and leaning-in to chat to Dean- that fucker Santi is leaning back in his chair, his jaw twitching in seeming aggravation, his arms folded, and his intense eyes needling your beau. In this dim light, with the firelight licking over the sharp planes of his face, he looks every bit like a trained killer about to leap out of the shadows and garotte someone. Well… a very petulant trained killer. His call sign should have been Mr. Grumpy Pants, you think idly.
What’s up with him this time?! you wonder.
He gets these moods sometimes. And, when it strikes him, he can be a little bit hostile - despite the fact he’s a puppy underneath it all. You had hoped that for once, maybe he would suck it up, and yet, your hopes had been in vain, it seems.
Every time Dean speaks, or touches you, or even laughs at another of the guys’ stories, Santi’s expression sinks further and further through layers of distaste; and, by this point, he’s eyeing Dean as though he’s a war criminal the squad have been sent to take-out. You half expect him to leap up and take down Frankie any second for fraternizing with “the enemy”, if you’re honest.
Truth be told, you’ve had just about enough of this. Your friend had better buck his ideas up, sharpish, or he’d be reminded very swiftly that you were Delta Force too.  
For now, trying to ignore the bastard, you look back at Dean, and the sight of him in animated conversation with your buddies causes at least some of your aggravation to fall away. Things have been going well between you and Dean, even if you do say so yourself. Originally from Michigan, he now worked as a lecturer at a nearby music school. He was also a banjo musician in a bluegrass / synth power-pop mash-up of a band, which (sort of) explained his retro-inspired mop of brown hair and his thick dark moustache - majestic enough to rival Frankie’s. True, he wasn’t your usual type, but he was honest, and sweet and kind... Plus, he’d never killed anyone with his bare hands, which was rather refreshing too, if you were honest.
Safe to say, so far, things were working out. So well, in fact, that you’d recently met his parents for the first time while they were in town. So well, in fact, that -after keeping him purposefully away from the boys for as long as you feasibly could- you’d now brought him to meet your family. That’s what this squad was to you, after all. Your family.
Remembering sporadic moments from the past few months together, you smile gently as you listen to Dean talk. You watch him seamlessly integrate some tailored conversation starters you’d fed him ahead of time, and you gently squeeze his thigh in an act of reassurance and appreciation. He is feeling the pressure, you can tell, although he is handling it well. To be fair, you think, who wouldn’t feel the pressure? You’d been nervous enough to meet his parents, but this? A bunch of Delta Force guys and an MMA champion? This squad was lethal; literally -you’ve lost track of your combined kill count, though Will probably hasn’t, you are sure.
Aside from that though, most of all, they are your family. You need them to like Dean and vice versa, and you know that isn’t necessarily a given. You are a tight-knit group, with little hope of outsiders grasping the full extent of your decade’s old in-jokes, or the intense camaraderie instilled by facing a hail of bullets together. Plus, as the baby of the group, they were protective as all hell of you.
It came from a good place, you knew: they wanted what was best for you. But, there was a reason you’d delayed this meeting... It’s not as though they were threatening or anything. They didn’t do the whole “if you hurt our buddy, I’ll kill you” thing, for example (at least, not while you were present – you couldn’t vouch for what happened when you were out of earshot).  However, after introducing a succession of boyfriends to them over the years, the squad had developed a well-rehearsed system for sizing-up your new squeeze. In the past, not all of your squeezes had made it through the gauntlet. It was a trial by fire, to be sure, and you were pleased that Dean has not yet been burned.
Of course, whilst the boys’ approval didn’t mean everything to you, you couldn’t deny it was important; perhaps especially this time, with this guy. And, out of all of the group, Santi’s approval meant the most to you. Always had. Probably because Santi meant the most to you, full stop. You simply couldn’t imagine having someone in your life that didn’t get on with your best friend. And, so, you are not overly thrilled at the reception Santi is giving Dean right now. The reception he had been giving him all evening, in fact. And the more you dwell on it, the more an anger bubbles forth from you. Even though you try to push it down, and focus on Dean, that fucker in the corner of your eye sends you.
“What’s wrong with you tonight, Garcia?” you blurt out, a little louder than intended, causing the amiable chat and giggles to stall, all eyes turning to you - then, in turn, following the direction of your fiery gaze over to Santi, who shifts uncomfortably in his seat.
Now, he leans forward. Looks back at you with a rare venom in his eyes. With a smug curl of his mouth, he dips to pick up his beer from the floor and takes a swig - buying himself some time. Trying to brush you off. Still, your gaze does not relent as he rests his elbows on his thighs, bridging his fingers together in the space between, thumbs sticking in the air.
Now, he engages, and he looks directly at Dean, his eyes sweeping dismissively over the entirety of his form. Now, he speaks, his voice filled with far more bitterness than the situation merits. “Nothing at all. I’m fucking peachy. So, Dean. You play the motherfuckin’ banjo?” he offers, and yet, it sounds far more like an accusation than a question.
What the fuck is up with him?
Wilting a little beneath Santi’s stare, as the ex-operative squints his eyes in his direction, Dean casts a helpless, sideward glance at you from his place in the circle, and yet, you are so stupefied by anger that you can do little to help.
“I think what my dear friend means to say -” Frankie dips in valiantly, smacking Santi pointedly on the thigh, likely hoping to smack some sense into him too “- is why don’t you tell us more about your music, Dean?”
Frankie’s eyes and smile are soft when he looks at you, surreptitiously exchanging a pointed look -what’s up with that pendejo?- and you are grateful that at least some of the evident tension is diffused when he picks up the slack in the conversation.
Santi and his mood swings be damned, and, feeling bolstered, Dean continues on.  
“Actually, it’s going pretty frickin’ well with the band. It’s a side-gig to my lecturing job, but we’re planning a tour during summer vacation. The States -east coast- and Western Europe for now. Maybe headlining a couple of small festivals, if that pans out, who knows.” Dean relates, humbly.
“That’s great, man,” Will chips in, helping Frankie get things back on track. “We’ll have to come down to a gig soon, hear you play.”
“Actually, we have something to tell you about the tour, don’t we, babe?” Dean says bashfully, and he looks at you expectantly, waiting for you to pick-up the thread. You’d talked about it before coming today, and it had seemed like a great idea at the time, but suddenly, now that the announcement is imminent, your mouth is dry - as if filled with cotton. Still, you force a smile, and you’re not sure why, but you look anywhere else but at Santi as your lips form the words. “Yeah – kinda big news, fellas. I’m going to join Dean on the Europe leg of the tour. I’ll be leaving you losers behind for a few months.”
Dean’s face cracks into a smile and he reaches for your hand, looking made-up at the prospect. Still, while you will yourself to be fully present in the moment, you find yourself focussed on looking anywhere but at Santi, sure that his stare must be boring into the side of your head. You hadn’t told him yet. Unfortunately, at Santi is where just about everyone else ends up looking, as the fucker abruptly pushes his camp chair back and stands, storming indoors before anyone can hope to fathom it.
You exchange glances with Frankie, Will, and Benny, with Benny thankfully stepping-in this time to distract Dean from the obvious, and asking him which stops you two will be making, and which sights you plan to see.
“Look, man, don’t mind that tool. Got any sightseeing plans?”
What is Santi’s problem? Why can’t he give Dean a chance? Yes, you’ve made some mistakes in the past- been hurt, and Santi had helped you pick up the pieces -every time- but you had a good feeling about Dean. A really good feeling. Can’t he see that too?
Frankie throws a concerned glance back towards the house and motions as if to stand, but you beat him to it, wanting to get to the bottom of this. “I’ll go,” you insist, motioning for Frankie to stay put, and with a quick promise to Dean that you’ll be back soon (and a silent plea to your boys to take care of him in your absence), you do just that, walk-jogging across the grass.
When you step inside to the kitchen, you find Santi stood, hunched over the counter, his palms clasping the surface tight enough that his knuckles pale, and his head hung low, his shoulders rising and falling as he takes in exaggerated breaths.
“Well?” you ask pointedly, with zero tolerance for his bullshit. “What’s going on with you? Wanna explain why you’re being an ass to my boyfriend?” you challenge to the back of him, and he instantly whips around at the sound of your voice. 
“I’m being an ass?” he asks indignantly, his eyebrows shooting towards the top of his head. 
“Yes. In a nutshell. Yes,” you hiss, any other interpretation feeling impossible. You fold your arms and purse your lips, making it plainly evident that you are waiting for some explanation. And, oh boy, it had better be good.
Instead of explaining though, Santi simply huffs out breath, gesturing angrily out of the window. “That guy, really? That’s the guy you’re gonna go all in for? Go to fucking Europe for?”
That guy, you mouth silently, completely stupefied for a moment. You’re not sure exactly what your so-called friend is insinuating, but you are clear that you don’t like it one bit.
“What is your fucking problem?” you ask, punctuating your words with motions of your hands, as if you are trying to strangle the air in-between you in lieu of his neck. “Dean’s a catch. He’s hot, he’s sweet, he’s a nice guy. He’s there for me. He takes care of me.”
“Like I don’t take care of you?!” Santi exclaims, his voice rising and abrasive; and then, immediately after the words tumble forth from his lips, he steps back imperceptibly, as if startled by his own outburst, his hand rasping over the stubble on his chin.
“What in the...? This isn’t about you, you ass!” you bite back, face scrunching up in confusion. Your fingers come to your temples as you grow increasingly lost-off and perplexed, and seemingly, your riposte only makes Santi double down on whatever the hell he is complaining about.
“Who’s the one who’s always been there for you, hmm? Who picks up the pieces every time you make yet another dumb shitty choice with another shitty guy?” he rambles, gesturing his hand towards you dismissively.
You step back from him this time, just a little, tears spiking instantaneously in your eyes at such an unnecessarily cruel blow. He’s right, in a sense: you had always relied on Santi to heal you, not to hurt you - and yet here he was dealing these painful, incoherent blows out of nowhere.
“Shit, Garcia. If it’s that much trouble to be there for me don’t bother next time,” you snap, your voice breaking as the swell of anger and hurt and adrenalin sends tears spilling over your cheeks. “Don’t worry though, I don’t think I’ll need you again. In fact, I have a feeling this guy might stick. So, maybe? Maybe you should think about the fact that the only shitty guy around here is you.” 
“You really think he’s good enough for you, hmm? He’s really who you want to end up with?”
You listen, aghast, as his tirade keeps coming. However, as Santi’s voice breaks with emotion part-way through his second question, you can’t explain it, but you feel an intolerable sadness in the pit of you. Even though you’re not sure what’s causing all this, what you’re barrelling toward, you want to thrust this sadness away from you. Push him away from you.  You want to push away the knot in your stomach for fear that if you tug at that thread, you might arrive at an answer to his question.
Exasperated, overwhelmed, you roughly paw tears from your cheeks, not knowing where all of these feelings are coming from, in either direction. “Fuck, I... I don’t understand what this is. I don’t get it!” you say, waving your hands, palms-up, through the air. “Is this some macho bullshit? Have I pissed you off somehow?”
At that, the wave of Santi’s anger crests and breaks; as you wonder if you annoyed him. Then, as suddenly as his anger came it is waning, his eyes pooling with rare tears now. With a huff of breath he tears off his damn cap, tossing it aside to run a hand through his grizzled hair. 
“No. No,” he backtracks a little, palms up in surrender. “You haven’t... I.... I just...” He pinches his lips in-between his teeth and looks up at the ceiling as his words trail off, perhaps trying to steady his voice before continuing. Or, perhaps he has nothing else to say to you. Perhaps he’s said enough.
You examine him. Still pissed as all hell, but worried now too, and ultimately, your love for your best friend slightly edging-out the anger. It’s rare that anything affects him like this, and you can’t help the sudden rush of concern.
Cresting too, you exhale a tightly held breath into the now silent, taut space between you, and your body sags - just a little. You chew over your words a moment, but when your voice comes back the volume is lower, your tone softer - and, although it cannot be considered friendly, by any stretch, it’s the best you can do right now.
“You know what,” you offer, generously, wrapping your arms around your own middle, stroking your forearms with your own fingertips. “I’m giving you a pass. You don’t even want to give Dean a chance? Then just leave, Santi. Just go. I’ll give the guys some bullshit excuse that doesn’t leave you looking like a total ass, because I’m not a dick to my friends. So just go, okay?” You pump your eyebrow at him indignantly and await a response, your manner stiff and unyielding.
Santi closes his eyes and knits his brow together, something like regret finally passing over his face and he shuffles guiltily from foot-to-foot.
You puff out air through your teeth and shake your head, as you observe this Delta Force hero; the bravest man you know in many ways, but still too cowardly to tell it like it is. To admit that he’s in the wrong. You are afraid to say that even as his gaze comes back to you, misty-eyed, you have little sympathy for his plight. You are sure it is of his own doing. You are almost as sure that he won’t open-up.
“You know,” you begin, breaking from your position and gathering up a fresh cooler of beers from the fridge, turned away from him as you speak. “I brought Dean to meet my family. Do you understand that? I didn’t have parents and siblings for him to meet. I have you guys. You’re my family.”
Still nothing. Nothing but silence greets you. Nothing but a pained expression on his face, his brows drown together and the artificial light of the kitchen highlighting the harsh planes of his face as you look over your shoulder at him, waiting for some reaction. Some admission of guilt. None comes. He simply slots his hands into his jean pockets, looking sheepish.
“So,” you continue, greeted with a brick wall, “fuck knows why you don’t want me to be happy, but I am. I’m happy with him. Thanks a ton for shitting all over that.”
You don’t even bother to look towards him this time, instead placing the last of the clinking, condensation-adorned bottles into the carrier, resigned to head back out without him, and without any apology.
“I’m sorry,” he finally says, and your head whips towards him in surprise.
He looks it - sorry. He looks apologetic. Deeply so. He looks sorry for this, for every way he’s ever slighted you, for every time he’s hurt you, even in ways and moments you never knew about. He looks sorry down to the pit of him, and it catches you off-guard when you see it freely offered there in his eyes.
Even so, this is a stubborn man. There’s an apology, but there’s no explanation. Nothing to explain his behaviour. So, even though it seems genuine, it also doesn’t seem like enough.
It doesn’t appease you, and yet, all you can bring yourself to do is sigh deeply.
You know Santi better than anyone, but there’s always been a part of him that has seemed out of reach, even to you. You’re not sure -never have been- whether to be scared or excited by those unknown parts of him. Not sure whether the impasse hints at buried secrets too dark and deep to bear, or whether it hints of a possibility of something more. Something deeper or something better you could have together, if only he would let you in. You don’t know, and you never have, but all you are sure of is that you have constantly teetered on the edge of that abyss, too much left unknown to know all of him, however much you may have wished to. He’s entitled to his secrets, of course, but you hate how they hurt him. 
With a little sympathy now, you examine his watery eyes, and when your voice comes back this time, it is softer and slower than you intended. More tired than you expected.
“You know, Dean wants to be with me. And he tells me so.” You casually dip down to pick-up the cooler handle, eyes still fixed on your best friend. “He might not be Delta Force… he might be a banjo player from Michigan… but even he’s brave enough for that.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Santi says, bristling all over again, his hand rasping angrily over his stubbled jaw, and yet, you decline him an explanation. Instead, keeping your own secrets now, holding back, you head towards the door, beers in hand.
Still, you turn back to him. You might be angry, but you still care for him -more than you could say. 
“If you figure out what’s up with you, let me know, and I’ll be there for you. Whatever you’ve got going on, you know that, right? But this? This isn’t okay, Garcia. You might think that I make dumb choices -you ass, by the way- but I’ve watched you hit self-destruct so many times instead of dealing with your feelings. Maybe you should look at your own life, huh, instead of shitting all over me for trying to be happy? Shit, at least I fucking try.”
His eyes shift from side to side in the room, the muscles in his jaw twitching, chin jutting forward, and his thumbs locked in his belt loops. He can’t quite bring himself to meet your gaze; at least not until you are disappearing through the threshold; until it’s almost too late. Why can’t he ever manage anything unless it’s too late?
“Wait!” he pleads, but you cut him off, before he can speak. Even though, truth be told, you’re not sure he would muster anything to say at all, even if you gave him a chance. He’s so used to holding back.
“No,” you say firmly. “Forget it, I’m done. I still love you- you’re my best friend. But, fuck, just go home, and get out of my sight, Santiago. I’m so pissed with you right now.”
And so, you turn away, and when his words finally do come, they are spoken to the back of your head. They are spoken without you ever seeing his lips move, and you wonder if he ever said them at all, or if this might be some cruel trick of the night. Some witching hour spell. That is, until you turn towards him and you see the words painted clearly on his face too.
“Fuck it. I’m in love with you.”
I’m in love with you.
Why can’t he ever manage anything unless it’s too late?
You’re not sure what reaction he was expecting, but you almost choke on the sudden lump in your throat. You feel a taste of bile rising-up into your mouth. An intense, resurgent anger fills you, which near makes the room spin, and makes your hands and your legs tremble.
Even if a hidden, unconscious part of you has been waiting, hoping for these words all these years, when they finally come all you can feel is... royally pissed off.
“Oh. No. No. No,” you repeat, words gradually increasing in volume, looking at Santi as if he has mortally wounded you, rather than offered that confession. “You do not get to do this to me.”
You see a hard swallow bob down his throat, a near-instant regret on his face, and your heart pounds in your chest as you reel with the implications of his words.
The coward. The fucking asshole. He waited until now? All the times things had gone to shit, and he waited until you were happy?
“All the times...” you accuse, your tone as bitter as the taste in your mouth, the metallic tang of blood as you feel a rushing in your ears. “All the fucking times. All the chances, Santi, and you do this now?” you continue, your finger sawing through the air, wagging accusations at him, even as your voice wavers, as your hands notceably tremble. “No. Fuck you, Garcia. Fuck you.”
You want to cry, or scream, but you are too angry. So angry, that it eclipses anything else which might come to light. So angry that you almost come full circle again, beginning to stabilise out at eerily calm.
Santi looks down at the floor, and exhales air, chuckling disbelievingly to himself, then lightly nodding his head, lips pressed tightly together. His feet shift agitatedly below him as he brings his endlessly familiar eyes back up to meet yours. This time when he looks at you, it hurts. You remember bullet wounds, and you swear that was nothing compared to this.
“That’s it? That’s all you’ve got to say to me, hmm? Fuck you, Garcia?”
“What the fuck were you expecting?” you say, launching your words before you realise the implications of them. Yes, you know fine well that your boyfriend is sitting outside, likely wondering where you have got to. But, if you had the wherewithall to have thought about it, you would know exactly what Santi was expecting, despite all of that. You would know that a part of him must be expecting, hoping, that when he told you, you might reciprocate. That you might love him back.
And, would that be so outside of the realms of possibility? Would it be so hard to imagine that the deep, magnetic, and unshakeable friendship you shared could be something else? Something more? That you could tip over the edge you had long been teetering on? Maybe it could, or maybe it could have, but right now, you can’t see past the flashbang he has just dropped over your life, and it is clouding your vision.
You were happy. You are happy. Fuck him for doing this now.
Why would you fall into the unknown for him, if you never knew whether he would catch you? If you never knew whether ruin or safety awaited you if you let yourself tip? He always held back.
What the fuck were you expecting?
Your words linger in the space between you, and in lieu of any other lifeline, realisation dawns on Santi’s face. Realisation that, although he jumped, you are not intending to catch him either. But how could you catch him, with your arms already full?
And, so, he slowly nods his head once again, his eyes beading with glassy tears and his hand grazing over his chin in a self-soothing gesture. Wordlessly, he sets his jaw and he abruptly replaces his baseball cap on his head, padding a few steps forward to stand opposite you, sucking all of the breath from your lungs. This time, when he looks at you, you see all of your past, but you still can’t see beyond that. The abyss still scares you too much.
Like this, facing each other down, eye-to-eye, the silence in the room grows sharp as a knife, refined to a point. So, when Santi abruptly turns to leave in a sharp, determined trajectory, without so much as looking at you, it is as if he has dragged the blade across your skin in an equally swift motion. As if he has left you open and bleeding-out, having delivered a mortal wound with the act of his exit. You’ve felt like this on the battelfield before, and in life, yet he was always there for you. Always there to patch you. To pick up the pieces.
Instead of screaming open-mouthed for help, this time, you simply watch him go, and now you are the wordless one, mustering nothing but a gasped inhale of breath before your vision blurs with tears - as you watch his hazy form disappear along the hall and out of your sight.
“Santi,” you call pathetically, your voice small and weak and teary, barely making it past your throat, and he doesn’t hear you. He doesn’t hear you but even if he had, you’re not sure anymore if he would have stopped.
When Santi slams the front door behind him, you shudder with it in its frame, your hand coming to your chest as if to hold your heart inside your opened-up ribs, and you close your eyes against the jarring sound, tears spilling down your cheeks, your face screwing-up into a shined, contorted grimace.
Entirely lost, now alone, you bizarrely wish for the room to be filled with anger again, instead of the intolerable sadness - which all too suddenly takes hold of you as your emotions crest and break. It is all you can do to stumble forward a few paces and hunch over the countertop, finding yourself in the exact position you had discovered Santi in. You stand, bracing yourself with your arms, fingers clutching the edge of the worktop, and your head slumped forward, tears freely spilling out of you as your chest heaves.
You wonder whether he’d held himself in this same position because he had felt an intolerable sadness too. An intolerable sadness at seeing you happy.
Suddenly you could understand it.
That fucker. Santiago “Pope” Garcia.
I’m in love with you.
I’m in love with you.
The words echo in your mind, but this time, if you’re honest, you’re not wholly sure if they’re his, or yours.
PART TWO IS HERE
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sekaedy · 2 years ago
Text
2023: The Year of Expression
Welcome!
Hey there, person. Someway or another, you’ve found yourself at the personal blog of me, Kayla or Sekaedy, and I welcome you. I hope your 2023 is off to a good start.
I guess I’ll introduce myself a little bit. I’m 24 years old, I live in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, and I’m in school for web development. It’s not exactly my dream career but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t enjoying it so far. And as far as job prospects go, I mean, everyone needs a website nowadays, right?
What I really want to be is a writer. I want to tell stories. To communicate the weird, unique ideas I have in a way that people can actually start to understand and even enjoy them. Mind you, it's not that I'm just beginning writing for the first time at the ripe age of 24, having never touched a keyboard before. I have stacks of notebooks of half-baked concepts, heaps of unfinished fanfiction and plenty more ideas kicking around my head. I even had a short story published in a university anthology!
But I still feel like I haven't earned the right to call myself a 'writer' yet. Mostly because I don't actually write that often. I'd like to think the act of writing this article and posting it is enough to change that, but I don't. Not really. I fell off completely the last few months for all sorts of reasons, but even for a while before that I was barely writing a few paragraphs a day. The mental act of formulating sentences and paragraphs, and the physical act of typing them out feels almost foreign now, because I've been out of the game for so long.
But no longer! Enough is enough!
Why we're here
Starting with this post, my writing funk is over. Throughout 2023, I intend on writing one article a week, for the purpose of reacquainting myself with writing stuff and, equally importantly, posting it. One of my problems is placing way too much importance on the things I write, to the point I get psyched out and paralyzed.
This project is designed to be as low pressure as possible, so every week I can just have fun with it. Maybe one week I'll do a review of something I read or watched, and the next I'll do a writing prompt. Maybe I'll have a thought I want to explore, or god forbid some opinions on current events. The possibilities are endless. The only rule is they have to be at least a thousand words long, so I have to actually write something of substance. As of the end of this paragraph I should be about halfway to 1k, so I'd like to talk about my plans for the new year :)
New year new me
youtube
That was one of my favorite videos by one of my favorite YouTubers, CGP Grey. If you didn't watch it, it's about an alternative to New Years Resolutions: themed years. Normally, people set goals for themselves for the new year that, ideally, feel attainable within that year. But then life gets in the way, you set aside your goal, and by the time December rolls around again, your goal is no longer attainable and you've failed. This video instead proposes that you choose a broad theme for your year to strive toward, that you can adapt to your needs as your circumstances change while still moving in the right direction.
I think it's an amazing concept. CGP Grey didn't invent it, I'm sure, but that video has over four million views. I'm probably not the only one who found out from him. A few years ago (I want to say 2020) I did the Year of Creation, and I actually wrote more that year than I ever had previously. For various reasons I didn't do any themes since then, but I'm revisiting it now because I know which direction I want to grow this year.
My theme
All my life, in all sorts of ways, I've been pushed away from being my true self. I'm not going to spend this article recounting my ~tragic backstory~ or anything like that, except what I have to to make sense. I was always a weird kid. Some people were curious or mystified, but most were annoyed or weirded out by me. I'm almost definitely some flavor of undiagnosed neurodivergent, and I was bullied a lot no matter where I went.
The lesson I learned from that is to push my personality deep down and be agreeable and unobtrusive wherever I went. I definitely had annoying tendencies and bad habits that I needed to improve on, but I think instead of refining my personality to something unique that people could appreciate, I just pushed it all down. And I realized that it was killing me.
Nowadays I actually do have friends who genuinely care about me, but I feel like they don't know the 'real' me. I never really let them know the ‘real’ me, because I don't know the 'real' me. In 2023 I want to be more true to myself, and become more comfortable putting myself - whoever that may be - out into the world. I don't want to live in fear anymore.
I recently realized (or maybe accepted) that I'm trans. I'm at the beginning of a very long journey with respect to transitioning, and I'm sure I'll talk about that experience here. Either way though, I don't think I'll ever get results if I'm not honest with myself about who I am and who I want to be.
I'm also in the middle of a more-or-less mutual breakup of a 3.5 year relationship. I respect my ex and care for her, but I needed to be able to find myself independently of another person. I also want to expand on this experience through articles in the future, because man if that’s not a catalyst for self-reflection and growth I don’t know what is.
So this year, I'm focused on getting to know myself. Understanding myself. Figuring out how I fit in this hellworld by actually putting myself out there in my writing, my actions, and my choices. It's really daunting, and I'm scared of being on my own again, and I'm afraid of alienating people, but I'm also excited. I've suffered from depression for so long but I'm hopeful that there's a light to the end of that tunnel. Sometimes that hope takes more effort than it feels like it's worth, but it's not like I have anything better to do than to strive for it. So my purpose for this year is clear.
2023 is the Year of Expression.
Thanks for reading.
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mingoyeob-archive · 4 years ago
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Can you please do:
53: "We're stuck in the middle of a storm and all you want to do is play in the rain,"
41: "Dance with me,"
61: "If you keep looking at me like that I won't be able to handle myself,"
45: "Take.It.Off"
With Jungkook and reader.💜
Loads of love✨
under the oak tree drabble game ⚔️🌳 to make up for my delayed release of part 3 of under the oak tree i’ve decided to do a drabble game! send me a number + any of the characters from under the oak tree and i’ll write you a drabble :)
thank you so much for sending in a request 💜 💜 I love that you sent in multiple prompts cause it allowed me to really develop the story! I kinda went crazy with it tho, can you call 2.5k a drabble? idk but I hope you enjoy!
53: "We're stuck in the middle of a storm and all you want to do is play in the rain," + 41: "Dance with me," + 61: "If you keep looking at me like that I won't be able to handle myself," + 45: "Take.It.Off" - jjk x reader - word count: 2.5k
Your body swayed back and forth in your seat as the carriage wheeled over bumpy roads and rocky dirt paths. It had you gripping tightly to the underside of the leather seat to prevent yourself from falling to the hard cabin floor. Your gaze stayed trained out the window, watching the trees go by and the rain pouring down creating puddles along the roads. The small drops on the glass had your eyes zeroing on them, watching as they raced back and forth towards the edge of the carriage door. Oh how I tire of this dreadful weather you mused, a frown settling on your face at the thought.  Jungkook grunting as if to catch your attention was the only thing that had your head turning away, meeting dark brown pools that filled steely eyes.
“Are you upset with me?”
Any other day his question would have had you scrambling to pacify his concern, but today, your foul mood had you holding your tongue. Of course you were upset, he was taking you to the one place you hated the most - home. Well, what used to be your home, Uwhen felt more like your home now than that place ever did.
You fixed him with a blank stare. “Yes.” you say, voice monotonous and lacking any obvious emotion.
Your blunt response had Jungkook's eyes slowly widening as he registered just how bad he had fucked up. He never would’ve guessed you’d be this upset, he was doing this for you after all. When Jungkook first got the invitation to attend one of your fathers council meetings to oversee the trades occurring with other kingdoms he was completely set on denying the request; he was never one to meddle into things that didn’t directly affect his people. But one of his own advisors, Seokjin, had reminded him that as the new Duke it technically was one of his responsibilities to be there. Plus, according to him, a good opportunity to get you out of the castle.
“If I was her, I’d want to get out of here as soon as possible!” He had said comically, laughing at his own terrible joke loud and squeaky like. Jungkook frowned at the memory.
Had you said something to him about wanting to leave? he had wondered. Even though you hadn’t (you barely even knew the man), Jungkook’s worries continued to spiral out of control and he hastily had sent your father confirmation that he would be there and that he was taking you with him. He hesitated with his response trying to find the right words to make sure he didn’t make the situation worse. “I’m sorry I assumed you would be ha-”
Bang!
Jungkook's apology was interrupted by the loud sound of something cracking, the two of you launching off your seats as the carriage immediately leaned over on its side. The crash had you two falling out of your seats onto creaking wood, bodies crumpling onto one another and limbs draped everywhere. You had let out an oof at the fall, but Jungkook had seemed unfazed and if anything more pissed off than dazed. It took you a minute to gather your bearings, trying to determine which way was up and which way was down, but as soon as you did you realized you were staring directly into Jungkook's eyes, body sprawled across his chest.
It seemed like he had made an effort to try and catch you during the fall and somehow his arm had found its way around your waist, huge hand unintentionally landing directly on your ass. Your face heated up immediately. “Jungkook, your hand.” he just quirked an eyebrow, oblivious to what you were referring to which only served to make you more annoyed. "Take.It.Off"
He looked confused for a second before finally registering where his mischievous hand had strayed. Despite how he was internally freaking out, his hands had calmly retracted and instead moved to your shoulders to lift you back into your seat as if you were as light as a feather, catching you off guard. You could only sit there surprised at the action, watching as Jungkook’s giant figure struggled to stand up in the cabin, neck bending to duck out of the cabin when he opened the door.
“What the hell happened out here?!”
“I’m sorry my Lord, but it seems one of our wheels got stuck in a hole and broke its bearing.” The coachmen muttered embarrassed, cringing at the obvious anger that showed across Jungkook’s face. The driver's words had you sticking your own head out of the door, flinching as the ice cold rain immediately started drenching you.
“Well how long will it take you to fix it?!” Jungkook questioned irate.
The man avoided Jungkook's fiery gaze, rubbing at his neck, “Considering the craftsman isn’t until the next town, I’m not quite sure. We’d have to walk the rest of the way unfortunately and that could take the rest of the day and probably into the night, sir.”
Jungkook let out a groan, obviously upset with the coachmens words. He threw his hands up, turning in his spot to kick at the edge of the broken down carriage only to just notice that you had stepped out into the rain yourself. Immediately he walked over, boots stumping in the mud. “Get back in the carriage Y/N.”
You scoffed, “No way, you heard the man. We’ll have to walk and you’re not leaving me out here by myself to wait for you to return with a damn wheel.” You glared up at him, neck straining to look up and meet his gaze confidently. “Besides I think I can handle a little rain by now.”
“Rain has nothing to do with it. I didn’t plan on leaving you, I’m staying here. He can walk to the town by himself,” The driver let out a sound of alarm at his statement to which Jungkook paid no mind to. “He can send word to your father to get another carriage to escort us the rest of the way.”
“Jungkook, staying here would be the worst thing to do and getting my father involved would just be a nuisance and you don’t want to make him upset, do you? We can just stop at an inn and stay till the morning.” You were obviously trying to stop Jungkook from continuing the journey to your father. But he didn’t know that of course and he actually began to mull over the idea. The two of you stood in the rain for a moment glaring at each other, waiting for one of you to give up. When he realized that he wasn’t going to win, he let out a grunt, spinning on his heel to trudge down the path. The driver stared back and forth between the two of you, confused about what just happened. You just smiled at your plan actually working and followed behind him, satisfied with your accomplishment.
For a while the three of you walked, completely soaked from the relentless downpour with clothes clinging to your bodies. Thankfully it began calming down as you continued on the road, but the mood surrounding everyone was still tense. You could tell Jungkook was still upset as he had never stopped glowering at the forest ahead, eyebrows furrowed and jaw tense. His bristly mood had you sighing, perhaps it was time for you to try and break the ice.
“Jungkook.” you called from behind his towering figure, stopping in your tracks. He didn’t immediately respond, but after realizing you had halted he turned to look over his shoulder, offering you a grunt in question.
“Dance with me.” you say with a smile, beaming despite his obvious annoyance.
He merely arched a brow, finally facing you to stare at you blankly. Jungkook crossed his arms, “What?” he said.
You giggled, “I said dance with me!” you did a small spin in your spot, lips tilting up at the corners as you extended a hand in his direction. He just looked at it, face void of emotion.
“We're stuck in the middle of a storm and all you want to do is play in the rain.”
He sounded dreadfully confused, but that didn’t deter you from your mission. “Yes! In my opinion, mud makes for an excellent dance floor.” your voice dripped with excitement and when he didn’t show any sign of taking your hand you just took it upon yourself to take his hand from his folded arms and pulled him forward (it barely moved him but you get the jist).
Jungkook sighed and tried to stand his ground as you pulled relentlessly on his arms. The sound of your feet splashing in the mud made him cringe but regretfully he started moving to the beat you seemed to have made up in your head. You two spun in circles and moved back and forth down the path, making up your own dance as you went. The coachmen watched amused from the sidelines, clapping along to the two of you to mimic the sound of music. You knew Jungkook was trying to look like he was still upset, but you could tell it was an act and that he was starting to warm up to the idea as you went along. His arms started to loosen and his back started to untense, shoulders relaxing to make it easier for you to pull him along. He was even biting back a smile at the sound of your cute sounds and the hums you were letting out in tune to the drivers rhythm. At that moment Jungkook thought you looked absolutely enchanting.
Despite the hair stuck to your face, the bottom of your dress covered completely in mud and lingering scent of mildewy smelling soaked wet cotton, the drops of water stuck to your long lashes and the flush in your cheeks trumped all of those things. He had never seen you smile so hard or look so comfortable in his arms. Besides the accidental fall back at the carriage, this was the first time you had been this close to him since your wedding night and he could feel the heat radiating from your body, your hearts beating to the same rhythm. He truly felt like you were his.
So he watched as you continued to spin, laughs full of glee escaping past your lips. You even had the nerve to stick your tongue out in an effort to catch raindrops, showing off the long expanse of your throat and jutting collarbones. The sight had something stirring in him. And you must’ve noticed the change in his face because you stopped in your step, smile calming and eyes softening. You could tell he was deep in thought, so you didn’t feel the need to speak just yet. Instead, you just looked at him, eyes gazing up at him and swimming with admiration. Your shining irises peeking up below your lashes had your stare coming off as almost sultry and he felt his pulse quickening. When you picked up on the shift in his mood you decided to speak up. “Is something the matter, Jungkook?” you questioned, looking up with wide eyes. You looked so innocent. He knew it was wrong, but he wanted so bad to corrupt you.
Jungkook pulled you so close you had to strain your neck to stare up at him just before he dipped his head down, lips so close to touching. "If you keep looking at me like that I won't be able to handle myself."
Your breath caught in your throat and your face was full of surprise as you just stared at him speechless. It was almost as if you two were having some type of heated conversation with the way his dark eyes connected to yours. The tension was undeniable. But you two seemed to have forgotten that you guys weren’t the only ones out there on that dirt road, and the sound of the driver clearing his throat had you two stepping apart.
“Are you guys um...ready to keep heading towards the inn?” he mumbled, obviously uncomfortable. The two of you couldn’t answer fast enough.
“Yes!”
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esperantoauthor · 3 years ago
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Oh I'd love to hear about Tech Thriller? 👀
You may have seen me posting that I wanted to write something like this a while back. I wholly intend to publish this eventually so I won't say too much but basically it is a story about Kurt uncovering the hidden dangers of a new implantable technology and desperately trying to prevent it from being released to the public. It was inspired by the podcast Tomorrow's Monsters which featured the voice acting talents of Darren Criss and John Boyega.
I'm going to share the first opening I wrote for this story because I really like it but as I developed this idea I started to think it might be better if Kurt started out more naive. So if it never does again, at least for today it can see the light of day.
🌟Ask me about my WIP folder🌟
Rule number one: never trust the government. 
Rule number two: no matter what you do, don’t get chipped.
Kurt tapped his foot impatiently against the slate tile of the coffee shop. It was one of those ultra corporate ones, the kind you can find on a the street corner of any city in the nation. It was done up in muted shades of green and brown. They probably had focus groups filled with people from all over the country so they could pick furnishing that offended no one. The walls are decorated with landscapes and the couches have fabric that is just a little bit rougher than you’d like, so no one gets tempted to linger. God forbid they make the place welcoming. Kurt hates these places but it’s a necessary evil today. He ran out of coffee and he can’t possibly start this day uncaffinated. To be fair, he can’t start any day uncaffinated. But this one is going to be particularly grueling. 
He looked on with disdain as the patron in front of him dutifully swiped his left wrist over the monitor. It beeped cheerfully and then he stepped aside to wait for his order.
Kurt gritted his teeth and stepped forward.
The girl working the register couldn’t have been older than 19; barely a legal adult. And yet, as she reached her arms behind her head to adjust her hair tie, Kurt saw the pinprick of blue light pressing through the skin on the underside of her wrist. She was one of them. It should be illegal to put one in someone so young.
“Uh, sir? Aren’t you going to check-in?”
Everything inside of him wants to glare at her but instead he screws up his face into as unthreatening a smile as he can muster. “I’m unplugged.” He holds up his arm to show her.
The girl’s eyes grow wide. “Didn’t know they were still letting people.” 
“Well, they are. At least for now.”
The cashier popped her gum and frowned. “I’ll have to get my supervisor. They haven’t trained me on manual orders yet.”
Kurt pressed his lips together but managed to repress a disdainful frown.
“Sure.”
After the girl has gone, Kurt mutters under his breath. “You’d think they don’t want to make money with how hard they make it.”
A gruff voice from behind him sends a chill down Kurt’s spine. “Seems to me like you’re the one making a problem. Reluctant adopters like you gum up the whole system, slow everything down. Like this line, for instance.
“I’m sorry, really. The sign outside said they take cash.”
The man scoffs but says nothing further.
The supervisor materializes, looking annoyed. “Cherlydine says you refused to swipe in?”
“I-I don’t have one. The sign says—“ 
“Yeah, I know what the sign says. Those are coming down at the end of the month. New policy rolling out nationwide. No more cash orders so don’t get used to it.”
Kurt swallows. Another one bites the dust. It was nice to know there was reliable caffeine fix within half a mile of him at all times, even if the coffee was nothing special. This is fine, he will just need to be more diligent about keeping his pantry stocked. He should get in the habit anyways. You never know what can happen.
The supervisor grunts as he hauls an old-fashioned cash register off of a cart and places it on the counter, plugging it in. He glares daggers at Kurt.
“Now, what can I get you?”
“I’ll have a large Peruvian Dark Roast with just a splash of soy milk.”
The supervisor merely grunts.
“Name?”
Not likely. “Eric.”
The supervisor presses a few more buttons on the register. “That’ll be $7.50.”
Kurt considers objecting but decides it isn’t worth dealing with any more of this man’s ire than he already is. He’s encountered this type of thing before. An extra charge for the inconvenience. More like a noncompliance tax. They haven’t made the chips mandatory yet but they sure have found plenty of ways to make life without one incredibly annoying as well as expensive.
He counts out exact change and hands it to the supervisor, then goes to wait for his drink.
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jaskierswolf · 4 years ago
Note
My dearest darling Wolfie, I saw your idea for game gerlion friends to lovers in @thewitcherbog horny chat and I am here to ask you to write the fic. Pls 💜😘
Tada!! I can't remember if this was exactly what I had planned... but it's what we're getting. Lovingly beta'd by @comfyswitcherblanketfort.
CW: probably rated M? Briefly mentioned masturbation more horny than smutty.
____
A retirement at Corvo Bianco had never been what Geralt expected of his life. He hadn’t been lying when he’d told a young Dandelion that witcher’s never retire, but in recent years between looting caves and haggling for contracts, he’d managed to save quite a bit of coin. He was, objectively, rich. He had the best armour on the Continent, the most deadly swords and crossbow bolts, and thanks to B.B., his house was beautifully decorated, with the exception of the rather garish portrait of his most loyal friend. Yet, he was still gaining more money than he knew what to do with. He’d started investing in merchants and refusing payment but the vineyard brought in a steady income and Geralt had to admit that his life was pretty luxurious these days.
So it wasn’t exactly a surprise when Dandelion had turned up, in fine, brightly coloured silks and the elegantly decorated elven lute from so many years ago. Geralt sometimes wondered whether Toruviel had enchanted her lute. There was barely a scratch and Geralt couldn’t even recall Dandelion ever having to change the lute strings in all the years he’d known the bard. Geralt was no expert but he was pretty sure that you were supposed to change the lute strings.
The sun was shining over the fields of Corvo Bianco, and Geralt felt at peace. Perhaps that was why he was feeling so nostalgic, pondering over the events that had led him to this moment. His life had always been so busy, but with Ciri off touring the multiverse, and Yennefer doing whatever Yennefer did these days now the Djinn wish had been broken, he was… well… bored? He had every Gwent card currently made, and no one would play him. It was just him and the bard, living the bachelor’s life in Touissant.
So was it any wonder that Geralt had started to develop feelings for his friend? Perhaps they’d always been there, clouded by the wish that tied him to Yennefer, or perhaps their newfound domesticity had awoken something in Geralt that he had never expected. Dandelion spent a lot of time in the makeshift study, working on his latest book, but they always ate together and sometimes the bard would even accompany Geralt on his contracts in the fields, for old times sake. After long nights of drinking too much wine or vodka, it wasn’t unusual for the pair of them to fall asleep together, curled up in one bed just like they used to in their youth. Those were Geralt’s favourite nights, because despite his protests of being better alone, he enjoyed the familiar warmth of another body pressed against his, and Dandelion had always been a cuddler.
And as if on cue, the bard burst through the doors onto the patio where Geralt was watching the world go by.
“Ah, Geralt, old friend, there you are. I’ve been looking all over for you!” Dandelion announced with a flick of his wrist. “I was just in town.”
“Dandelion,” Geralt groaned. “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”
“Dear Henrietta will forgive me in time, my friend,” Dandelion winked, his tongue flicking out between his lips, “and until then I have plenty of friends who will offer me shelter if the guards are around.”
“You look like a man sized peacock,” Geralt scoffed. “How the hell does no one see you?”
“Ah, dear witcher, you forget that I used to be a spy,” Dandelion laughed, putting one hand on his hips. “Now, stop interrupting, Geralt, or do you not care about the gift I picked out for you in town today?”
Geralt hummed, knowing that it didn’t really matter whether he cared or not. Nothing would stop Dandelion once he was in the middle of a story. Some things just never changed. “Go on.”
Dandelion beamed, and from behind his back he produced a wooden box. The poet cocked his head as he opened the lid, revealing a set of tiny vials neatly lined up. Geralt almost choked, his breath catching in his throat.
“Oil?” he spluttered. A man such as Dandelion had to know of the more promiscuous uses of oil. Whilst Dandelion had never explicitly said as such, the way he talked of his lovers had always led Geralt to believe that he was rather flexible in his tastes, much like Geralt himself.
The poet blushed as he pulled a single vial from the box, his long lutist fingers wrapping around the glass. “Bath oils, Geralt.”
“Oh, of course,” Geralt cursed internally. Dandelion had bought all sorts of expensive oils and lotions when they had been on the path together, neither of them were shy with their bathing habits and the poet was a highly skilled masseur.
Which was not helping Geralt’s sudden rush of arousal as he remembered the feel of the poet’s hands on his skin. They’d laughed off awkward erections in the past, it was just a thing that happened… but Geralt was starting to wonder what would happen if, for once, they let it happen.
“This one will probably be a bit much for your witcher senses, my friend, but I rather like it,” Dandelion continued, oblivious to Geralt's inner turmoil. “This one,” another vial was plucked from the box, “however, I think you will like, and I managed to buy this,” Dandelion pulled a scroll from his pocket, “from a local mage. It’s supposed to move the water around the tub, like a massage!”
“And you’re telling me this, why?” Geralt sighed, rolling his eyes. As much as he adored his old friend, the man could take his sweet time getting to the point. It was even worse when the poet and Regis got together, Geralt honestly thought he might never know peace again.
“Because, Geralt, I am treating my dearest friend to an extravagant bath time experience!” Dandelion exclaimed with wide arms, almost knocking off his own hat in his enthusiasm. “Friendship and love, art and wine, Geralt. What more could you want in life?”
Love.
No, friendship. Geralt needed to focus on that. How many times had Dandelion called him his friend? Too many to count.
“Assuming you have wine, what’s the art?” Geralt smirked, enjoying the offended noises Dandelion made.
“Geralt, I’ll have you know that-”
“Relax, Dandelion. I’m teasing. So how about this bath then?”
The two men made their way upstairs, peeling off their outer clothes as they strolled past Geralt’s bedroom, and picking up a robe each. Dandelion had filled the room with candles, and there was a soft floral scent hanging in the air, roses, the oil vial that Dandelion had initially held up.
“I thought this one was too much for my ‘witcher senses’?” Geralt scoffed, peering at the magically bubbling water.
“Well, yes, but I did also say I liked this one, and I’ll admit that I got a little carried away. You don’t mind, do you Geralt?”
Geralt shook his head as he stripped off his final layer of clothing and settled into the tub. Dandelion sat in a chair, still wrapped in his robe, and picked up his lute. He plucked idly at the strings until he was seemingly happy that they were in tune, and then he began to sing. Geralt sighed as he sank deeper into the hot water, the enchantment really did feel like a sort of massage as jets of water pulsed against his skin, but he couldn’t help but wonder. The oils, the candles, the romantic ballad…
Was his friend trying to tell him something?
It was time for Geralt to test the waters as it was. He trod the water with his hand, gently splashing to the beat of Dandelion’s song. Normally, he would close his eyes and let the poet’s music fill the room, but instead he was mesmerised by the way Dandelion’s finger caressed the lute strings. Geralt could feel his cock harden as he pondered what other uses his friend’s delicate hands could have, the way they found their mark with such precision. The poet could make any instrument sing to the gods in his hands, Geralt was sure that he was no exception.
“Practicing your fingering?” he asked Dandelion with a tilt of his head.
The strings twanged unpleasantly, making Geralt grimace as the sound reverberated in his head. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”
Geralt smirked. “On your lute.”
“Right, yes, of course,” Dandelion muttered. “I’m just trying to figure out the next verse. I could use a hand, or an ear if you’d be willing to help.”
“I have a hand you could use, or two,” Geralt muttered not really intending for Dandelion to hear him but the poet had sharp ears and he spluttered incoherently as he set down his lute.
Geralt hummed and let his hand drop beneath the water, stroking his cock lazily. He wasn’t really chasing any real pleasure, but it was a good feeling, sending warmth across his skin. The bath, the candles, the song, they had to mean something even in Dandelion’s subconsciousness. The man was an insatiable flirt, and yet never seemed to notice when others’ affections were cast upon him, not unless it was blunt in its honesty.
So Geralt would be blunt.
He closed his eyes as he continued to stroke the length of his cock, the motion causing the water to ripple slightly, but not yet enough to draw Dandelion’s attention. The poet was too busy wittering on about his rhymes, only noticing when Geralt’s breath hitched as he cupped his balls.
“Geralt?”
“Dandelion,” Geralt grunted softly, his pleasure beginning to build from a warm ember to a roaring blaze that burned through him. The poet’s cornflower blue eyes were on him, dark and hungry. His cheeks were flushed rosy, and it seemed his dear friend was finally catching onto what was happening.
“I- I can leave, my friend, if you would prefer…”
“Stay,” Geralt insisted. “This not what you had in mind?”
“Well,” Dandelion laughed. “I had hoped, but I never thought it would actually happen, and well, really I thought it might take a little more convincing. Who knew all I needed all along were a few cheap candles?”
“Just get in the bath, Dandelion,” Geralt growled.
“Okay, okay,” Dandelion said with a roll of his eyes but shrugged out of his robe, allowing Geralt to admire his slender form. The poet’s cock remained soft as he stepped into the water. “So… how long?”
“Hmm?”
“How long have I been more than just a friend to you, Geralt?” Dandelion asked, settling into the water with a soft moan. His hands resting on Geralt’s thighs, fingers drawing patterns on Geralt’s skin under the water.
It wasn’t an easy question to answer. Could he even pin it down? Geralt wasn’t sure.
“Hard to tell, our friendship has never exactly been normal, Dandelion,” Geralt admitted.
Dandelion laughed, leaning forward in the tub, his hands stroking up Geralt’s thigh, the movement forcing the air from Geralt’s lungs. “You know, you’re right, and I think we should celebrate.”
“Celebrate?”
“Mhmm, and how about we start with a kiss?” Dandelion winked, before falling into Geralt embrace with a splash.
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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 4 years ago
Note
What are your thoughts on Near and Mello (Death Note)? You don’t seem to like them as characters
I was about to say that I don’t necessarily dislike them, but, honestly, I do. I really really do.
And hey, look at that, I get to offend an entirely new fandom. 
To be honest though I’m not even sure where to begin.
I suppose I’ll start with the concept of the orphan heirs to the title of L.
Wammy’s Dog Fighting Arena for Boys
Death Note is a fantastic and brilliant anime, however, every once in a while more general anime tropes sneak through and cause it to fall flat on its face. We have L, who for reasons is a sugar addicted man child (well, I actually have thoughts on L, who I quite like, but my theory is that he is the way he is because he’s a jackass who fully intends to be that off putting).
The Wammy orphan bit is the worst of this. We have an orphanage of... children competing for the title of L, an anonymous detective that Watari made up. These children are all super serial geniuses who are even weirder and less socially adjusted than L. Just, kill me.
Even the premise for why they exist is bad. The authors’ in the Death Note guide admit that, when they realized they were going to kill off L, they realized they had a major problem. They didn’t want a repeat arc with another L as a nemesis, SO THEY BROUGHT US TWO Ls, THAT’S COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!
Why I call it anime derp is that the whole ridiculous Wammy’s concept is never addressed. Wammy’s existence, the little we do know of L’s backstory, makes Watari the level of skeevy reserved for manipulative Dumbledore.
The man uses these children and pits them against each other in a high stakes intellectual environment where they stake their entire worth on their still developing intelligence.
In canon, we see what this has done to Mello, L, Matt, and Near. All of them are completely messed up human beings and they either die or never get better. L is an utter jackass who cares very little about justice. Mello becomes an actual gangster and uses the Death Note to make hits on rival gang members (not to mention Sayu, but we’ll get into that). Matt also becomes a gang member and kidnaps multiple women. Near cannot function, at all, in society and when we catch up to him ten years later in that hilariterrible one-shot he’s gotten even worse.
If we’re taking LABB as canon then you have Beyond Birthday who becomes a serial murderer and lights himself on fire in a desperate, insane, attempt to show up L. We have reference to A who killed himself under the pressure of trying to become L. 
We can presume there’s been other orphaned children, who had nowhere else to go and no one to protect them, that Wammy just destroyed so that he could have Batman.
Death Note, however, never touches this with a ten foot pole.
Instead these are our weird and quirky band of heroes who are so weird because... it’s anime and we like weird! Weird means you’re a super genius! Yay genius orphanage!
So, right at the very idea of Wammy’s existing, they already have to win me back. Mello and Near do not win me back.
Mello is a Thug
We’re supposed to feel very bad for Mello, he’s always been second to Near and this messes him up, and he leaves to try and find his own path. I’d say god bless him, you go Mello, except his own path turns out to become a gangster.
Mello’s not a remotely good guy.
Just because he’s pitted himself against Light, and tells us he’s sticking it to Kira and Near at the same time, does not make him remotely good. And that’s what irks me about him, Mello is a great skeezy character, but the story actively wants me to think he’s the hero.
It’s sort of like trying to convince me that Kylo-Ren is secretly a great guy. It’s really hard to sell me on that when we watch Mello in real time and, more, why are we even bothering? Let Mello be the scumbag he is.
First, Mello steals a weapon of mass destruction and immediately begins using it. It’s not about solving the Kira case for him, or at least, it’s certainly not about stopping Kira. It’s about showing up Near, L, and all those who never believed in him. 
That Mello, first, not only steals the notebook from the government, but then gets it into the hands of gangsters, AND THEN USES IT TO ASSASSINATE HIS RIVALS. Well, suffice to say, you do you Mello.
More, this is a guy who tortures, murders, and probably rapes multiple people to get this to happen. Mello’s attempts to retrieve the notebook start with the kidnapping of Japan’s head of the police force. He then kidnaps Light Yagami’s younger sister and... Something very bad happens to Sayu.
We never get confirmed what happen, we don’t see much of her in captivity or much after, however immediately after the events we see her in a wheelchair. At the end of the series, Sayu is catatonic and barely able to express emotion.
It’s highly implied she was raped.
With the kidnapping of Takada, regardless of what you think of her... Nothing good was going to come of that. Mello resorts to the tactics of terrorists just so he can prove he’s a big man.
Further, Mello’s brilliance is never really that brilliant. Yes, he gets the notebook (though notably does not hold it long and loses his name in the process). However, his big win at the end is supposed to be him having realized Mikami would mess up were he to kidnap Takada. He had no guarantee of this, frankly, I think he was just kidnapping Takada in an act of desperation. Because that’s what Mello does when he runs out of ideas: he kidnaps people close to Light Yagami and sees what happens.
This gets both him and Matt brutally killed.
Near’s a Moron
Near is so weird and so maladjusted, my god, and he’s such a pretentious ass. He’s just... knock off L in every way. Which, granted, is kind of what he’s supposed to be. Except that the story never capitalizes on this. 
We see hints of it, Near trying desperately to live up to L’s name and mantle, but it never really delves into it.
More, what we do see of Near’s plans...
I really want to go into the one-shot epilogue, because that said so much about Near, but I’ll resist.
Instead I’ll note that L was 13 days from proving Light’s guilt. It takes Near and Mello combined five years, and Mikami’s dumb ass, to get to the same place. And even then, they nearly all died if Matsuda had been a worse shot.
Near has no idea that he’s nowhere near as brilliant as L. Instead, he gives us the world’s most hamfisted, frustrating, lecture at the end of the series where he tells us that Light was so stupid and that together he and Mello triumphed over evil.
Good for you, Near, I’m so happy for you.
I Just Don’t See the Point of Them
The second half of Death Note, in general, is a slough. It’s not just me saying this, you ask the majority of the fanbase, and they’ll admit it all goes downhill with L’s death.
I think the authors desperately wanted to avoid writing the dystopian politics of what would happen if Light won unopposed. They wanted a detective thriller, the trouble was, that story ended with L’s death.
So they try to feed us the same, but worse, story twice, and it just doesn’t work.
Personally, what I’d rather have seen is Matsuda and company slowly but surely realizing Light is Kira and Matsuda, in the end, having no choice but to assassinate him as they just cannot get any proof. It’s a very different story, but it would have been such a good story of betrayal that, again we sort of got hints of, but never really confronted.
Alternatively, keep Naomi Misora alive, and have her be the spearhead of brilliance we need. As it was, I am eternally sad/amused that she was killed off because she was too damn smart for the series (the authors admit she figured everything out too fast and as a result had to be eliminated).
Just, please, not genius orphan children. 
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ourloveisforthelovely · 4 years ago
Text
Jealousy (oneshot)
Harry Potter marauders era 
Request: Hello, I was wondering if you could write a oneshot, where the reader and Regulus have a friends with benefits thing going on and they have feelings for each other but he won't admit it, so a random boy asks the reader on a date and Regulus gets super jealous and admits his feelings and they start a proper relationship. You can decide whether you want it fluffy or smutty. 
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 
Rating: M- smut
Songs in Story:  Songs in Chapter: Tiring Game by John Newman and You and your Hand by Pink
________
Our love is just a tiring game, I never want a thing to change, Our love is just a tiring game. I'll never give it up,
“Y/n, wake up. We fell asleep again.”
You yawned before yanking the blanket over your head. The last thing that you wanted to do at the moment was to think about going to potions class. All that you wanted to do was lay in the nice warm bed that you had been occupying for hours.
“Quiet yourself, Regulus. Still sleepy.”
You heard Regulus chuckle as he pulled his abandoned pants on. He sat back down on the bed and shook your leg.
“If we don’t get to class, Slughorn will figure out that we are out together. If he starts watching us then there will be no more fun.”
You knew exactly what Regulus meant by “fun.” The two of you had been in a "friends with benefits relationship" for over a year and a half. Fun meant the two of you sneaking off to some hidden section of the castle or the room of requirement to fuck your frustrations away. The arrangement had worked just fine for the most part. Both of you acted as friends during the day (with the hint of mutual pining) then at night both of you would be all over each other.
No one seemed to notice anything different about your relationship with Regulus and if any had any suspicions they didn’t speak of it. Regulus had been glued to you since your first year so it wasn’t uncommon to see the two of you together constantly.
Everything about the arrangement had been just fine for you until you started developing feelings for Regulus. The realization hit you like a brick to the stomach around month five of the “arrangement.” You had started to look beyond Regulus’ good looks to see the man who he was beneath it all. He wasn’t the shrewd, sarcastic boy that everyone else saw. With you, Regulus was gentle and cared about what you wanted or needed. He knew how to please you and often left you crying out underneath him (or on top of him).
The problem was Regulus didn’t seem interested in taking this relationship up to the next level. You would have been thrilled if he would have asked you to be his girlfriend...but it never happened. He instead seemed happy with just keeping you under his watchful gaze with the title of “best friend.”
Sitting up, you knew that if the two of you didn’t get a move on there would be no time for breakfast. Pulling your shirt on, you froze the moment that you felt Regulus’ hand on your shoulder.
“Wait, I forgot to cover up a love bite.”
You sighed as he took out his wand and pointed it to the very noticeable bite on your neck. What you didn’t say to Regulus was that you wanted to stop hiding the bites. You wanted to be able to kiss him in public...but how could you when he didn’t seem interested?
What you didn’t know was Regulus was feeling the same way. He had been silently brooding over feelings of love and desperation for the past few months and didn’t know how to deal with them. Never in his life had he had these feelings before. Now that he had them, Regulus had no idea what to do with them.
What if you didn’t love him back?
What if saying how much he loved you turned you off and you wanted nothing more to do with him?
Was Regulus ready to risk losing the chance to give you physical love if you would accept the romantic side of things?
There were so many “what ifs” that Regulus was left deciding to keep all of his feelings on the inside and suffer in silence. Suffering in silence was, after all, what he was good at. You would be yet another reason for him to keep quiet. Regulus didn’t want to lose the one bright spot in his life. The last thing that he wanted was to lose the one real friend that he had in his life. You had been his best friend since first year and hell would freeze over before Regulus let you get away from him.
“Reg, are you ready? We need to get going?”
Your voice pulled Regulus from his thoughts. He quickly looked up and nodded before throwing on his robe.
Slipping into the great hall, Evan was the first to look up when you sat down beside Regulus. He looked up over his half-eaten breakfast. You gave Evan a warning look as if begging him not to say anything. Evan was the only person that remotely knew of your “true” feelings about Regulus and had been sworn to secrecy. That didn’t mean that he had to be quiet about it in private. Evan had encouraged you multiple times to talk to Regulus but you never did.
“Good morning to the both of you. Where have you two been?”
Regulus didn’t turn to look at you. He took a sip of the drink that Evan shoved in front of him.
“Sorry, my brother and his idiot friends were pranking some poor Ravenclaw. It was such a disaster that we couldn’t look away.”
Evan chuckled.
“That is highly believable. It's like watching a world-class disaster.”
You nodded, rolling your eyes.
“Detention is their second home. If you two will excuse me a moment. I need to go talk to someone.”
Regulus knew that you were going to talk to one of your female Slytherin friends. You didn’t have many of them but the few that you had were halfway decent. Regulus didn’t feel bad giving up some of his time for the two.
“When are you going to ask her out?”
Regulus looked up at Evan’s comment.
“What?”
“You heard me. The two of you have it so bad for each other.”
Regulus snorted.
“You’re full of shit.”
Evan shrugged as Jacob Brown from Ravenclaw walked across the great hall to where you sat with Ameile Adams.
“Yeah, well, how do you feel about that boy talking to your girl?”
Regulus immediately sat up straight and frowned as he watched Jacob’s mouth moving. You, meanwhile, sat appearing stunned. Regulus didn’t like that look on your face. Was Jacob making you uncomfortable? Did Regulus need to kick his ass? If so, he didn’t mind. He was bigger than Jacob. It was more than a fair fight.
“Come on.”
Regulus snapped before getting up and storming over to where you sat with Evan on his heels like a puppy.
Jacob barely looked up when Regulus sat down beside you.
“I’ll talk to you about it soon. Thanks for the consideration.”
Jacob grinned before turning and walking off looking freakishly proud of himself. Before Regulus could ask what happened you turned to face him.
“How bizarre, Jacob asked me on a date.”
Regulus immediately felt his stomach drop to his feet. Evan’s mouth had dropped too and he didn’t dare turn to his best friend. He didn’t have to look at Regulus to know that the boy was in an internal panic.
“And you said?”
Regulus questioned. You shrugged.
“Well, I said yes. It’s just a lunch date on Saturday.”
“But my quidditch game is Saturday. You always come to that.”
Regulus immediately snapped. You frowned, slightly taken back by your best friend’s sudden horrid mood. If you didn’t know better, you would think that Regulus was jealous. You knew better than that though. That would mean that Regulus would care about you in a more than friendly way. He was probably only upset because you were going to miss his quidditch match. You, of all people, knew how much that meant to him.
“Reg, it's just one match. I come to them all.”
Regulus’ eyes were darker than normal as he glared at you. He sat a moment before muttering “whatever” under his breath before standing up and storming off.
“What the hell was that?”
You questioned. Ameile, seemed as surprised as you did. She didn’t respond as Evan laughed.
“I think Reggie is feeling a bit jealous.”
Regulus avoided you for the better part of the day. He was literally nowhere to be found and it was starting to bug you. If Regulus was so jealous of some other guy dating you then why didn’t he man up and ask you himself?
You are overthinking this. This is just about the stupid quidditch match.
You thought angrily as you stormed down to the quidditch pitch. Practice for the Slytherin team should be over within the next few minutes. If Regulus thought that he was going to get away without the tongue lashing of a lifetime then he obviously didn’t know you too well. The last thing that you were about to be was some “poor pitiful” soul.
Regulus stood talking to another teammate when you finally spotted him. Normally, you would have patiently waited for him to come to join you. As much as you didn’t care for anything athletic, you knew how much quidditch meant to Regulus would come to watch him practice or his matches. That’s what good friends did.
You could see Evan sitting in the stands in your typical place with Barty Crouch Jr. He automatically grinned before elbowing Barty in the ribs. You of all people knew that Evan was waiting for some kind of “show.” If he pulled out a bucket of popcorn, you wouldn’t be the least bit surprised.
Regulus had finally looked up. His gaze met yours before quickly looking away. He said something to the other boy and turned to go off in the opposite direction.
“Oh hell no, you didn’t”
You grumbled before going after him.
“Regulus, wait!”
He didn’t turn. Regulus apparently decided that he was going to refuse to acknowledge your presence.
“Regulus Arcturus Black, I said fucking wait! I swear to god if you don’t stop ignoring me I am going to fucking hex the hell out of you and you know that I can do it.”
Regulus finally glanced over his shoulder.
“Whatever, sweetheart. See you tonight.”
The little jab about sleeping together quickly got under your skin. Is that how he felt? Did he think that he was going to get to be inside of you after treating you like this?
“Whatever right back to you, sweetheart.”
Regulus laughed at that. His next comment was about to be very crude but he didn’t care.
“So how do you think that your little boyfriend is going to like knowing that I feed you my cock every night? Do you think Jacob will like knowing that you are fucking another guy on the regular?”
You turned and stormed off in the opposite direction before you said something that you were really going to regret later.
Ameile looked up when you barged into the common room. She was surprised to see the angry expression on your pretty face.
“Okay, Y/n?”
You shook your head.
“Hell no. I hate Regulus.”
Ameile looked totally surprised by the comment that came out of your mouth. You never said anything bad about Regulus. Ameile had literally never heard you say a single bad thing about Regulus. When Ameile began a friendship with you, she thought that the two of you were Regulus’ girlfriend. She was honestly shocked when Evan told her differently.
“What did he do?”
You sat down and slammed your head onto the headrest.
“I can’t tell you everything. He’s just being a jealous shit.”
Ameile raised an eyebrow.
“Oh come on, Y/n. We tell each other everything. I can assure you that there is nothing about you that would honestly shock me.”
You knew that you didn’t need to tell Ameile your biggest most guarded secret but at the moment you needed advice from someone who wasn’t Regulus.
“Fine, don’t breathe a word of this to anyone or I will hex you. Regulus and I have been friends with benefits for a while...well....well...fuck I have feelings for the git. He’s been a seething jealous little shit since Jacob asked for that date. Well, me being the joyful person that I am, decided to call him on his garbage and you know what the ass said? He had the nerve to say, see you tonight, sweetheart AFTER FUCKING AVOIDING ME ALL GOD DAMNED FUCKING DAY!”
Ameile looked totally surprised by your outburst. She had honestly figured that you were sleeping with Regulus and now that she had the confirmation she was thrilled.
“That was a little bold on his end.”
“A little bold? I want to punch his fucking face in then kiss him. What is wrong with me?”
Ameile giggled.
“Nothing. There is nothing wrong with you at all. What did you tell him?”
You laughed.
“Whatever right back to you, sweetheart. I should have said it was going to be just you and your hand but I was so mad that I didn’t think of it.”
Ameile smiled before getting up.
“Come on, let's get you a drink. Evan has some whiskey and I have access to it.”
Half an hour later, you were pleasantly buzzed yet still feeling ready to fight. Ameile had put on some record and the lyrics hit perfectly.
“Feeling better?”
Ameile asked. You nodded.
“Feeling saintly.”
You replied as Regulus stepped into the common room with Evan behind him. Both boys automatically winced at the volume of the record that was blaring. In fact, they had heard it as soon as they stepped into the dungeons.
“That noise is coming from here.”
Regulus groaned. Evan noticed his bottle of whiskey in your hand and decided that it wasn’t worth losing a limb or getting a black eye over.
“Are you two drunk?”
Evan shouted over the music. You shook your head.
“Just buzzed and enjoying our boy hating music.”
You said the last part and focused your eyes right on Regulus who was clearly hearing what the song was saying..
I'm not here for your entertainment. You don't really want to mess with me tonight. Just stop and take a second. I was fine before you walked into my life. Cause you know it's over before it began. Keep your drink, just give me the money. It's just you and your hand tonight…
Regulus waited all of three seconds before realizing this was your drunken way of telling him to piss off and that he wasn’t getting a goddamned thing from you that night.
The next morning, you awoke in your own bed for the first time in a week. Groaning, you sat up. Just what the hell had you been doing the night before and what did Ameile give you to drink?
“Hey, are you awake?”
Ameile’s voice was super cheerful and loud. You winced before moving to get a clean uniform on.
“I’m alive if that is what you are asking. Where the hell did you get that booze?”
“Rosier.”
You rolled your eyes. Of course, it was Evan. Evan was the guy that you didn’t take booze from. Whatever he had would knock you on your ass and leave you drunk as fuck singing songs about stuff that made no sense.
“A word of advice, never take alcohol from Evan Rosier.”
Ameile shrugged with a grin.
“Come on, let's go get some food in you. I’m sure a nice piece of toast will make you feel better.”
Stepping into the great hall, you groaned at all of the loudness that was surrounding you. Regulus was staring right at you when you finally looked up. It didn’t take you being his friend to know that he was ticked off about something.
Probably me telling him that it was just him and his hand for company.
You thought before sitting down beside Ameile. Evan was cheerfully talking to Barty about something as he turned to you.
“Good morning, star shine. You look a bit rough.”
You didn’t hesitate to flip Evan off to his face.
“Fuck you and your booze, Rosier. If I wouldn’t puke on you, I would come over and beat the shit out of you.”
Evan looked a bit taken back as Regulus took his place beside you.
“That’s rude.”
Evan commented as you whined when Ameile started scraping butter on the piece of toast in front of her.
“Would you stop?”
You snapped. The sound of the knife scratching the toast was about to drive you nuts. How long did it take someone to put goddamn butter on a goddamn slice of toast? Ameile put the bread down before putting her hands in her lap.
“Y/n.”
Regulus’ voice was soft. Finally, something that wasn’t making your head throb.
“What?”
You replied as his long fingers wrapped around your wrist.
“Can we go talk? Alone?”
“I guess.”
You said as he stood up and gently pulled you along after him.
Walking in silence, you didn’t realize where you were going until the room of requirement’s door closed behind you.
“Here, drink this.”
Regulus said before handing you a cup. You looked down at it before snorting.
“Yeah, so you can poison me?”
It was Regulus’ turn to scoff.
“Would you stop it? I wouldn’t harm you.”
You finally took a sip of the drink and felt instantly back to your normal self. Looking up, you shook your head.
“Better?”
Regulus questioned. You nodded.
“It's a good thing that you are so wonderful at potions. I felt like death. What the fuck is wrong with Evan to drink that?”
Regulus laughed.
“It's Evan that we are talking about. Look Y/n, I wanted to apologize about yesterday. I was...I was a dick and you didn’t deserve it.”
“Why did you act like that?”
You questioned. Regulus shoved his hands in his pockets before his eyes rolled up to you innocently.
“Because I love you...and knowing that you are going to go on a date with Jacob is destroying me because it's not me.”
You knew that you had to be staring at Regulus with your mouth open for a while.
“You love me?”
Regulus nodded. He knew that he had to get his feelings out before he lost you for good.
“I do. I’ve been afraid to tell you because I thought that you would reject me. It looks like that is what you are doing by going out with Jacob so I fucked everything up anyway.”
“I never told Jacob yes...for what it's worth. Furthermore, I love you too, Regulus. I’ve been in love with you for so long. You just never seemed to be interested so I kept it myself.”
Regulus reached out to cup your cheek.
“Sweetheart, I love you. I want to be with you.”
You placed your hand on top of his.
“I want to be with you too. Regulus, I’m yours.”
Regulus looked as if he had won the lottery.
“I’m yours too.”
The kiss was soft and timid at first before growing needy. Neither of you was the least bit worried about the need to breathe.
“The bed...get on the bed.”
Regulus moaned against your lips as your hand gently palmed him through his trousers. You didn’t have to be told twice. This was the quickest that you had undressed in a long time. Sure, sex with Regulus was enough to get you naked anytime that he asked but this time it was different. The two of you weren’t just having sex as friends with benefits anymore. You were making love as a couple.
You quickly lay down on your stomach bringing your leg up giving Regulus access to your waiting core.
“Get inside of me.”
You ordered. Regulus didn’t have to be told twice. He was on the bed behind you in an instant. His fingers gripped your hips pulling you up enough to bury himself inside of you.
Fuck, she’s dripping wet.
Regulus thought. He knew that he was going to have to stop thinking or he would explode quicker than he needed to. Regulus wanted to take things slow. He wanted to watch every moment of pleasure that graced your face. Knowing that he was going to be the only one to make you smile this way was more than enough to stroke his male ego.
Regulus set a punishingly slow rhythm. You were clearly getting annoyed with his slower than normal teasing and tried to speed Regulus up by pressing back into his body. Regulus was not about to let that happen.
“If you don’t be a good girl then I’m going to flip you over and lick your pussy nice and slow. I think you know me well enough to know that I won’t let you come.”
“I want to hold you.”
You moan as Regulus slowly pumped into you again. Regulus considered your request for a moment before pulling out enough to gently roll you onto your back. He was back inside before you had enough time to come up with something crafty. At the moment, all Regulus wanted was to show you just who you belonged to. It was him...not that Jacob guy whose name you wouldn’t remember by morning.
“Reggie.””
You cried his name before tangling one hand in his hair and the other arm around his back. Regulus’ mouth was on yours. The sounds of skin slapping skin filled the room along with your cries of completion, as with each thrust of his hips, you were coming closer to falling off the edge.
“Damn it, sugar, you should feel how you're spasming around me. I’m so close baby. Would you like me to finish you off?”
You feebly nodded as Regulus reached between your joined bodies to tease your clit. His middle finger went from rubbing in a up and down pattern before switching to a circular pattern then back to the original.
“Fuck, yes. Regulus, please.”
You cried out, not caring if anyone in the castle could hear the two of you fucking like bunnies. Regulus picked his speed up abusing your already spasming core over and over.
“Good girl.”
Regulus praised as you finally came. His eyes had closed as he focused on his own release. Regulus wanted nothing more than to keep fucking you until you begged for mercy but...today...that wasn’t going to happen.
“You’re too fucking good, sweetheart.”
Regulus cooed, feeling his own release building. Your hand was on his cheek silently begging him to look into your eyes.
“Let me on your lap.”
Regulus silently agreed to whatever plan that you had to make him come. He sat up, stroking his length as you positioned yourself over him. Regulus groaned when you slid down onto him. Right as Regulus started to thrust again, you shook your head.
“No. Be still.”
Regulus groaned as your body gripped him tighter if possible. He wanted nothing more than to thrust up into you but he did as he was told. Regulus could be the perfect most devious of a dom but with one of the flip of the switch, he could be an obedient submissive.
“Be still, darling. Just relax. Enjoy the feeling of being inside of me. I’m still so wet, Reggie.”
He had a good idea what you were going to do. You were going to make him come just by being inside of you. This was one of your favorite activities when Regulus was desperate to come. You would sit snuggled on his lap with his cock inside of you while you stroked your fingers through his hair and whispered erotically to him.
“Not tonight.”
Regulus replied before snapping his hips one final time and coming inside of you. You moaned as his mouth closed on yours sealing the moment.
It was Regulus that was the first to move. He gently moved to lay you on your side. You only had to wait a moment before Regulus had his arms wrapped around you. Snuggling your face into his chest, you yawned happily.
“So I guess I should properly ask you to be my girlfriend?”
Regulus said with a truly happy smile. You quickly responded with a kiss.
“That’s me saying yes.”
________
@amelie-black @truly-insatiable @fandomsxxregulus @realgaytrash @spiderxalmighty @teletubiswszpilkach @whymyparentscheckmyphone @fific7 @jessyballet @knreidy1 @criminalyetminimal @rubyroscoe1 @acciosiriusblack @bennyberry @hazncalsgal @exhsle @lucasfilms77 @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @fandom-trash-worth-it @hankypranky @summer-novak @shaylybaby2032 @emiwrites3reads @li0nh34rt @tas898 @marichromatic @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @knight-of-gleefulness @stuckinsaudi1 @untoldshortsofthefandoms @sprnaturallover @deanwherescas @shitfaceddaniel @wontlookaway @mycuddlycorner
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cryinginthebackseat · 4 years ago
Text
you’ve got more poison than sugar - part i
AO3    part ii
Fandom: Call Of Duty 
Pairing: Russell Adler x Bell
Words: 4.009
Summary: Russell Adler should have known better that it wouldn’t take an entire nation or continent to bring him to his knees.
Warnings: just swearings, sexual tension, blood, mentions of past abuse and brainwashing. adler being that manipulative asswipe like usual. 
Author’s note: i don't know what i'm doing. one moment, i was watching the walkthrough of the new call of duty game, found myself curious, acutely curious by that guy with the scars and shades on- a younger, shadier (no pun intended) Robert Redford in Spy Game and oh my... fast forward to 2 weeks later, here we are.
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A house somewhere on foreign soil,
Where ageless lovers call,
Is this your goal, your final needs,
Where dogs and vultures eat,
Committed still I turn to go.
I put my trust in you.
A Means To An End - Joy Division (1980)
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It's mystifying how little she talks. Or when she does, it's always in fragments. Like a crossword puzzle in your local newspaper, but several letters are missing. He initially thought maybe MK-Ultra fucked her head or worse, if it hasn't worked at all, but the more he watches her, the more he realizes it's just the way she is. And it's ironic because he named her Bell. He expected her to chime like a goddamn goldfinch yet here they are. 
But he won't be fazed. Russell Adler is a man who's stopped at nothing in getting what he wanted before, he sure as hell won't stop now for a close-mouthed science project.
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“We've got a job to do, Bell."
It intrigues him, every time, the way the words trigger something deep within her psyche, the way her eyes change, her body stands a little straighter, like a machine ready to function at his disposal. It reminds Adler of one of those cartoons he watched when he was a kid about wizards and magic words, except there are no musical dance numbers playing in the background or a talking cricket perching on his shoulder. This is his power over her, over the USSR, over Perseus. That monstrous filth. It really does take a beast to tame another. 
Although he surmises calling Bell one would be superfluous. 
She barely looks like one, but Adler knows too well than to underestimate her. Just because Bell hasn’t shown her set of claws, that doesn’t mean she’s harmless, delicate, like a miniature China Doll in his breast pocket.
Bell never offered him her reply before, but now, now, she nods, head almost bows, obedient pretty thing, and says:
“Yes, Adler.”
So it goes.
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It takes West Berlin for Adler to realize she’s left-handed. 
She wears her watch on her right hand, smokes with that same said hand only when she’s writing or moving her pieces for an impromptu late-night game of chess against Lazar. And she always wears her gloves all the time- leather, black, lined with silk and pretty, small buttons on the cuffs, covering those striking red nails underneath. Whether it is for the theatrics or an old habit of hers, he can't really tell.
He doesn’t know why he begins to take notice of these mundane details about Bell, but rationalizes because he’s never been in the same room with this version of her, post-brainwash Bell, for more than 10 minutes. And for all intents and purposes, there’s still a lot of question marks surrounding her character; who is she? Where did she come from? What is her connection to Perseus? 
Are they in a possession of a walking, breathing bomb about to destroy them all or the West’s only salvation?
He supposes he’ll find out soon enough.
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Adler hears Bell from his table, typing busy on the computer- barely blinking- all soaked up in that caffeine-infused energy at 1 am. She's always like that, he learns, when it comes to working, always with that steel determination, pulling out all the stops as long as it gets the job done- that Soviet discipline at it's finest.
Reminds him a little of himself when he's young.
Adler walks up to her. 
“You done for the night?” A shake of her head is her only response. He sighs. “You should go home, Bell.” 
“You go. I’ll lock up behind you,” Bell replies, low and monotone; that youthful stubborn.
If she was any other person, he would probably commend her for such fierce willpower, but she is Bell, the walking conundrum, his ace in the hole. Call him paranoid, but the idea of her having the safehouse for herself does nothing but raises every alarm in his head.
“No, we’re going home,” he says instead, tone brooking no argument and she frowns at the screen, her fingers stop moving then looks up at him with those goddamn empty eyes. "Come on, it's late anyway."
She doesn't say anything. Adler wishes he could read her mind- or crack that lovely skull on the back of her head, dissect her brain, learn its secrets and answers. 
Adler has his gun with him. It wouldn’t take long. A quick, true shot to the heart to keep the brain intact. He’d have Hudson contact one of his people inside BND and he'd deliver the brain himself if he has to. They could do it. He heard they’ve been studying inmates' brains for decades now, anyway. 
Before he has a chance to entertain the idea further, though, Bell nods once and rises up from her seat. 
Bell walks past him. Her scent, like honeysuckle on ice, hits him like an uppercut in the face. Adler inhales, as if against his will. 
He thinks he could get drunk on it.
“Hop in. I’ll drive you back to the hotel,” he says once they’re outside, regretting the decision the moment the words left his lips, but he knows he can’t just leave her on her own at this late hour.
The irony isn’t lost on him, though, considering he just thought about unspooling her brain a few minutes ago.
Bell complies without a protest. Getting inside the passenger seat, wordless still, fingers toying with the radio. An angry, krautrock music comes blaring all over his car. Adler winces, but at least the riot is loud enough to muffle the one's brewing in his head. 
"How's your memory these days?" 
Bell shrugs. "Nihil novi sub sole." There's nothing new under the sun.
Good, he muses. The least she knows about herself the better.
Though that doesn't mean he's out of the woods yet.
"Listen, from now on, I want you to keep me informed if there's any new progress about your memory or if you've developed any new symptoms. I want to know everything." He steals a sidelong glance at her, making sure she is listening (she always does, but Adler needs an excuse)
(An excuse for what?)
"Alright, Bell?"
"Of course," replies the woman in question.
"Good." Adler shifts his attention back to the road. "Good." Taking a long drag, he considers trying to appeal to her sentimental side. It's not something you'd improvise last minute- at least not with someone you brainwashed to believe you are her mentor/confidant for the past decade, but he's itching to know where he stands with her.
"You know, I'm just tryin' to look out for you, kid."
Her lips twitch but the rest of her visage remains impassive and faraway, more like a flick knife than a woman. The correlation is uncanny.
That's when she inches closer. The space between them bridged. He freezes. Hyper-aware of just how dangerous this is, but can’t bring himself to pull back, to look the other way. Not when her hand reaches out to pluck the cigarette from his mouth, eyes still glued to his, and curls her lips around the filter. One heavy pull, and then she rolls down the window and tosses it out on the side of the road.
"Thought I'd reciprocate the sentiment."
And with that, she leans back in her seat before Adler could even process what has just transpired.
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“Welcome back to the land of the living, kid,” Adler greeted her, about a month ago. 
Park had insisted that he had to be there for her when she woke up (naturally, Adler had balked at the idea, but at the English woman’s fact-of-the-matter explanation, also because it had somewhat dawned on him last minute the logic behind her machinations- “both of you are supposed to have known each other for years now. If she doesn't see you by her side, she’s going to wonder why”- thus, here he was)
“How are you feeling?” 
Bell blinked owlishly and stared at the older man with those bottomless, cat-like eyes that had haunted him since January.
Her gaze eventually softened as recognition flickered across her face.
“Like someone just hit me in the chest with a bulldozer,” she said hoarsely. “Where are we?”
“St. Dismas’ hospital, Pittsburgh.” Adler got up and fetched her a glass of water from the table. “Although not a bulldozer, but bullets did. That, and you hit your head really hard on your way down. Thought we’d lost you there, Bell.”
Bell drank in silence. She’s still watching him, thinking. This was the first time he realized that he couldn’t exactly read her expression and somehow that threw him off.
“What happened?” she asked, one hand mid-air, like she was deciding which to touch first, hesitating and abandoned the idea. 
“You don’t remember?” She shook her head. Adler pretended to look remotely distressed about it. “The doctors warned me about this. It must have been because of the fall- heck, I could even still hear that sickening crunch from here.” He dragged his chair closer towards her bed.
“We were in Amsterdam. Remember Fohler?” she shook her head again. “Well, we’d been tracking this son of a bitch for months, but we were chasing him in Amsterdam. He was running away and climbed up some scaffolding. You were about to go up after him,” he recited the fabricated story he, Park and Hudson had crafted. “He shot you and you fell and hit your head against the pavement.”
Bell looked away first, silent. Her hand gingerly touched the back of her head and winced, albeit only slightly. 
Adler was almost impressed, if not, disarmed by how calm and composed her reaction was to all of this. But then again, after having had witnessed first-hand how the woman barely flinched under any kind of interrogation technique they threw at her- a personality built for wrestling tigers- he really shouldn’t be surprised. 
“Bell, what is the last thing you remember?”
Bell frowned. “Not much. I remember ‘Nam, but-”
“Vietnam? Kid, that was thirteen years ago.” Adler watched the way her throat bopped, like she was swallowing her own blood and the color drained from her face, just like the first time he’d seen her, and proceeded to drop the bomb:
“Bell, the year is 1981.”
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"Bell dear, would you mind taking a look at this?" 
Park's voice sails from across the room. She says it like it's a compound word: Bell-dear. Like the two words belong together. Bell-dear. 2 syllables, 1 word, 9 characters and that just might be the weirdest thing he hears this year and he heard many things.
"Bell dear?" Adler asks much later, his gravel-and-smoke voice reduced to a whisper, when she delivers a document to his table.
Park shrugs as if that explains everything. "What? I like her." 
He's tempted to say you really can't put a term of endearment and someone you brainwashed into submission in the same sentence, but what else is new?
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They wind up in a bar. It’s called Die Stube and the place’s brimmed with artists and all sorts of leather-clad, Bowie-esque dramatic, chromatic blue eyelids young people chattering over a dirty cloud of smoke.
The two of them colonize a lone booth in the back. It’s dark and the quietest. She orders a beer and he, a scotch and they drink in silence. There are moments where her head would twist to the side, as subtle as a needle and survey the phantasmagorical scene before them, like studying something from a petri dish. 
While he’s watching her.
Only to tear his gaze away to the nearest object he can find.
It lands on his watch.
"It’s almost ten. Hudson's contact should be here soon," he announces, if anything to distract himself. She nods mutely in reply, as always, and runs a finger around the rim of her glass.
"The place ain't much of your scene?" 
She shrugs, like it's self-evident. "I didn't know this was a scene, though."
"Well, that’s West Berlin for you. A worry-free playground for the hedonists, hipsters and proto-electro NDW enthusiasts with drugs on tap," Adler says, sipping his drink in practiced nonchalance. "Always makes my head spin."
"I guess I remember it differently," Bell replies, tinged with something akin to begrudging. 
That warrants his full attention. "What do you remember?”
Bell shrugs again and lights a cigarette instead, menthol, one of those long, skinny cigarettes they only market for women; biding her time, making him wait. She lets the smoke flares from her nostrils so her eyes are veiled.
"It’s hard to explain, but I suppose it’s grittier?” she gesticulates, searching for the right word like she’s skim reading the entire Oxford dictionary in her head. “Bizarrely, infinitely grittier and dimmer? Like being in an underground tunnel and there's not much to see."
Interesting. Maybe she’s recalling one of her ops for Perseus or her mind is confusing her with the world on the other side of the wall.
“Maybe you’re remembering one of our clandestine ops here. It was a few years after Vietnam,” Adler supplies, passing over the tale like bait.
She falls for it, hook, line and sinker.
“Ah, I guess that also explains my fluency in German.”
“I taught you that.” It’s only logical, he decides, that she learned from him. She’s supposed to be his protégé after all. 
An elegant brow quirk. "You did?"
"Yeah, though you were already fluent in Latin, Russian, Vietnamese and Portuguese when we first met anyway. You have quite a natural ear, kid.”
She gives him a look. He really can’t categorize it, but it makes it a whole lot harder to fight against her stare.
 “What else did you teach me?” 
If they were anyone else, the lines could have a potential to entice, to seduce, that winsome, catty-eyelashes coquette, but they aren't anyone else and Bell does not voice it like that. Yet the implication behind the question stirs something in the pit of Adler’s stomach anyway, that tight knot of confusion as it is buried with something else and he finds himself, once again, uncharacteristically speechless.
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That particular question of her stays, even hours later, unbidden. Interspersed with her scent and face. 
His emotions are a minefield whenever she’s near now. It evokes that newfound rush of terror within him, like walking on a tightrope or being thrown into the pit to face hundreds of hungry lions, bare hands. It makes Adler questions his every decision, and he can’t have that in his line of work. 
Adler lights his sixth cigarette, contemplating everything, nothing. Anything to distract him from her. It's 4 am and he’s exhausted, but his mind won’t stop whirring. This isn’t like him at all- like he's lost somewhere in a Dali-style labyrinth that is his head and he wonders if this is a byproduct of his fear or fascination or confusion for the young woman.
He fears it is all of them.
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(They're only 10 minutes away from East Berlin when he senses it, something akin to burning on his peripheral vision, pulling him like weight.
Bell is staring at him from across the seat.
He cocks his head slightly to the side.
Adler catches the quick, telling quirk of her lips, like she's about to smile but lights a cigarette instead.)
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“Did you hear that?”
Krauss has just crossed the wall and their soles are slippery from the rain. She's panting. Her breath is white like a fog. Adler muses it must be from the running, until his iris trails down to where her hand is clutching his jacket sleeve, the leather creasing like a modulation signal.
“What is it?” Adler asks, hushed. There are no Stasis here, but even one can't be too careful.
“The TV.” She’s gaping at the broken TV next to them. Adler looks at the said object, frowning, then back to her. “Y-you didn’t hear it?”
"Heard what? Bell, the thing's dead."
Bell withdraws from him. Stepping back until her back meets the walls, her eyes seeing and unseeing, like a lens finding focus in the dark, then she closes them, as if trying to regulate her breathing. Adler has never seen her scared shitless of anything before. The sight confuses as it intrigues him. 
"Bell, what's going on?" Adler steps closer, but he dares not to touch her. 
She shakes her head, dismissive. In just a span of seconds, Bell dons that mask she likes to wear again; deadpan and frustratingly distant. A spike of annoyance drives through him. Just when he thinks he can get through her, there she goes again, retreating behind her palisades.
"Nothing." Bell turns away abruptly and she’s walking again."Let's just go. The others are waiting for us."
He doesn't pry about whatever she heard on the TV- Adler knows better than to beat a dead horse, thank you very much- not even after they save her from Volkov's clutches, after she bashes his head against the steel door and reeks his blood all the way home, it seems superficial at the time.
Until two days later.
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The day starts, as it mostly does for the team, with a briefing. 
Fifteen minutes in and something like a gasp pulls his attention to her. 
That’s when he notices it; her hands are shaking, coffee spilling out of the mug over her hand. A shatter follows. Her mug smashes to smithereens at her feet. She’s swaying, near collapse, like a house of cards about to fall, a hand on her nose.
Adler catches her before she tumbles to the floor.
“Bell!” His arm around her waist tightens, trying to keep her steady. Lazar rushes to their side in a flash and helps him move her to a nearby chair. 
"Jesus Christ," he curses, more to himself than to her as he watches blood, a bead of angry red, trickling down her nose. "Sims, get me a washcloth from the bathroom."
He kneels before her once Sims returns with a damp cloth. Nicotine-stained gloved fingers tentatively grasp her chin, holding her still. 
“Kid, you alright?” Adler asks, worry bleeds into his voice without him realizing it. He firmly presses the cloth under her nose, his other thumb touches the pulse at her throat- it's almost sickly affectionate. “Bell, talk to me."
Bell looks at him, discombobulated, like he's a figment of her imagination, then blinks. Again and again until she heaves a deep breath.
"I-" she hisses. One hand flies up to her head. "Fuck. My head.”
Adler’s eyes immediately search for Park’s. A knowing look passes over her face and he knows without saying that she's thinking the same thing, like they're attached to the same brain-wire:
MK-Ultra.
There’s a fraction of pause, then Lazar asks, "Should we give her something?” 
Before Park can voice her answer, Bell beats her to it. "I already took an anticonvulsant this morning. It should have helped.”
“Wait, this has happened before?” Adler asks.
Bell looks away, a hesitating look shadowing her face. He fears the worst.
“Bell…” he tries again, a slight warning to his tone.
She sighs loudly, as if mentally preparing herself before walking into a storm. 
“Yes. Two days ago."
His mind instantly refers to East Berlin, the TV. Trying to connect the dots in his head. It seems far fetched, but now he wonders if she saw something that triggers this. Although he's never read about this on other subjects before, the correlation is just impossible to ignore.
Fuck. He heaves a breath, willing himself to calm down, to think. They can't afford complications at times like these. Not when there's so much at stake right now.
Adler snaps his attention back to Bell when she tries to scramble awkwardly to her feet, swatting his hand away. The hand on her neck immediately reaches for her waist again and pushes her back down onto the chair. His grip's tight enough to leave marks on her skin, but he doesn't care.
"Bell, for fuck's sake, stay still or so help me," he says, exasperated, not letting go of her waist. 
"I feel better now." Stubborn little shit.
He is tempted to scream at her face and grab both of her shoulders and shake. “The hell you’re not. Stop fighting it. You’ll only make things worse.”
Her face sours, if only for a millisecond before it morphs into guilt. “I’m sorry.”
Adler watches her for a long moment. It’s only now that he realizes that he’s still holding her waist and the cloth on her face. 
He backs away from her like he’s been burnt. 
“You should have told me. I thought I made it clear the other night to keep me informed regarding this,” he scolds. 
“I’m sorry,” she utters again and she looks so pliable like this, a blank canvas perfumed with obedience and lethal mind. It makes him almost feel sorry for what he has in plan for her once the shit show is over.
“Look, just go back to the hotel and take a day off.” Her mouth cracks open. He raises a silencing hand. “That’s an order, Bell.” But she merely scowls, looking more like jagged ice than a person. Hudson may have just met his match, after all.
“I told you I’m fine.”
“That’s not how it looks to me.”
“It is. It’s my body and I know what I’m feeling, and I’m telling you, I. Feel. Fine.”
His jaw clenches. “Are you disobeying a direct order, agent?”
Bell doesn’t answer, but her whole face remains challenging and hard. Undeterred.
Adler holds his breath. He feels the whole room collectively does the same. It’s like staring down the barrel of a gun and there’s an awful sort of danger to be found in that. 
Just when he thinks an imaginary bullet would dig itself into his skin, however, Bell utters, “Of course not.”
And so the woman resumes to her normal, docile self at a drop of a hat. Even when Park steps in and whisks her out of her seat, drives her back to her hotel with Lazar on shotgun. 
It doesn’t assuage his worry, though. He’s still restless throughout the day, like a roaring ocean inside a bell jar. She’s never done this before, openly rebels against him. Now, the situation is just bad. Not casually bad or almost-got-shot bad, this is the-entire-Europe-could-turn-into-a-nuclear-wasteland bad, an-armageddon-waiting-to-happen bad. 
What if this is the beginning of her old self trying to scratch her way out of the surface? Adler’s blood goes cold at the thought. He is going to have to keep a close eye on this development.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
West Berlin - 1 am, local time.
“How is she?”
“Stable. I’ve administered another dose of Propranolol before I left the hotel. She should be fit as a fiddle in the morning.”
“Tell me, what do you think happened to her?”
“My theory? Traumatic brain injury. A cumulative product of torture, trauma-based mind control and chronic stress. I've read reports about cases like these before in MI6. None of them is still alive to recount the tale, unfortunately."
Adler grips the phone. 
“How long do you think we have?”
“Theoretically, 2-3 weeks tops.”
“But?”
He hears Park sighs on the other line. “But then again, none of the subjects I’ve encountered before were like her. So, I suppose it’s still a little too premature to determine at this point."
Adler kneads his temple, feeling the start of that familiar Bell-induced headache forms in his head. Can things just be fucking simple for once? 
“We don’t have that much time anyway, Park. And if Hudson gets a wind of this, he’ll want her gone by morning. I can’t let that happen. Not…” he pauses. “Not when we are this close.”
"What are we going to do about her, then?" 
Adler sighs.
"Raise the dosages of her drugs,” he says. “And keep an extra eye on her. I think we may be heading into uncharted waters now.”
Tagging: @mvalentine cause you said to tag you with everything i write so  👁👄👁
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jdmslut-red · 4 years ago
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Alright hear me out… I’ve got this idea for a Loki x Daenerys story that I can’t get out of my brain
Figures… when I actually have time to think I get inspired instead of sleeping or relaxing on my time off 😅 I warned you guys, I’m in Loki world right now
Ok so in the events leading up to and during Ragnorak, Thor and Loki come upon the 7 kingdoms and meet our queen Danny. Im not gonna spoil too much in case I do decide to write this but I’m thinking of different ideas of how this will play out. I just need to explain and write this out cause currently my brain is like this is great… 😅 But basically, Thor and Loki help Danny and the others defeat the white walkers. After the battle is won Thor returns to Asgard to defeat Hela. Loki later joins him against Daenerys wishes. He promised her he would return however. ( by that time Loki and Danerys had already developed feelings and of course expect lots of kinky smut involving… magic 😏) but they never admitted straight out how much they actually cared for each other.
Anyway, after Asgard is destroyed. Thor, Loki and the rest of the survivors come back to the 7 kingdoms. Thor begs Daenerys to take the Asgardian citizens under her protection, which she does. Thor then tells Daenerys and Loki he’s going after thanos. Loki decides to go with him but Danerys pleads him not to. Loki promises her he would return to her again. Before they could speak again thanos appears in the 7 kingdoms as well looking for the tesseract in which Loki had taken.
After a somewhat lengthy battle, in which a lot people die including Daenerys second dragon. (The first one dying in white walker battle) Daenerys is furious and charges at thanos. He easily takes her down of course but before he could kill her Loki saves her, sacrificing him self (much like the painful death scene we all know)
Danerys holds a dying Loki in her arms while they finally confessed their love for each other. Anyways, Thor wants to go to earth to join the avengers. He pleads Danny to go with him but she declines, telling him she still needed to win the throne.
After witnessing her closest friends death, both of her dragons and the love of her life die before her arms, Danny whirlwinds into madness much like in the show. Burning the whole city to the ground. However, in my story jon snow doesn’t actually kill her. Having been taught some magic by Loki, Danny fakes her own death with an illusion before killing jon snow herself.
Ok so I haven’t really decided how she ends up in a different time line, there are possibilities. But basically the TVA finally tracks her down in which she meets present or past Loki I guess. There’s a lot more to it, but I just wanted to explain the important bits and see what you guys think. Cause in my head and typing this out now I’m like oh this sounds epic 😅 but knowing me and how complicated the MCU and Game of thrones universes are (especially since I don’t keep up with anything that Loki is not involved in) it’ll probably be shit 😅
Here’s some screenshots of a little sneak peek of a scene I wrote on my phone where past Loki escapes the TVA with Danny…
Ps: If I do ended up writing this I’ll probably only post on my archive or maybe create another blog idk yet. I mean I can barely keep up with this one with my life being chaos right now 😅
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zirkkun · 5 years ago
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Maybe this is cheesy, but with all the praising on stream, I decided I wanted to just gush about my friends and people I look up to on here too. I’m gettin’ sappy and sobby at this hour and I just wanna go out on a high note.
(Started writing this at about the half hour mark before Unus Annus’s death, and now it’s like an hour later. Gosh I just don’t know when to shut up huh? lmao)
@zilthai37 - heya!♥ know you don’t follow Unus Annus stuff, so this will definitely be out of no where for you, but god. You’re too good of a person. I can go to you for literally anything and honestly I probably take it for granted. Something trivial, something serious, you’re always down to talk. I’ve never met another human being who’s so open with talking about things and so open to learn about other people and ideals. You’re honestly so great and so wonderful, man. I love talking to you and I just want you to know that you’re incredibly irreplaceable as a friend and a person.
@cheshiregrinnbuttoneyes - I think you’re the only friend of mine from high school that still talks to me consistently -- and that’s so wild, considering during high school we almost never had the chance to talk. God, you’re just so passionate about your works and you’re always working on your art, and your art is so cute and wonderful. You’re also one of the NICEST people in the world. I don’t know many people who would be willing to give away what they have to support someone else. I adore talking to you and I’m so glad I didn’t lose you, and I never want to, not prematurely.
@secretly-neurotic - heyo! i dunno if you’ve been watching Unus Annus at all, so this might be a little random, but I just really want to say that you’re such a great friend and such a great memelord to talk to. Your art is AMAZING and I’m so glad that you’ve had the chance to be able to spread it to more people recently. I should do a better job of reblogging it so even more people can see it, haha. I know you’ve been real busy with school stuff lately and honestly i just feel really proud seeing you work towards things that you’re really interested in doing, while memeing it along the way. Tell your dad good luck with his BOTW game, hope you get your Switch back eventually lmao
@thoughtfullytired - i think of all my irl friends on this list, i’ve know you the shortest amount of time, but that doesn’t mean you’re any less valuable to me than any of my other friends. You always work so hard to improve your art, and you’re always so amazing at being able to express your emotions into your artwork. I love talking to you about everything, whether it be our nerd stuffs or just regular stuffs. You’re also so incredibly kind to offer your help on Act to Flirt, completely unprompted, when I came to you just ranting about my inability to write music, haha. Hoping the best for you in school (and for your space ship!!) even though I haven’t seen you in a long while.♥
@sansismybitch - ah the name sticks out in this sappy list, but it’s still a very fitting name regardless lmao. you’re honestly a really great and really inspired person. your dedication and interest in supporting those whose works you like is honestly unparalleled. i love when i get asks and memey submissions from you, it brings a smile to my day! talking to you is just so wonderful, and i know a lot of people out there would agree. i just want you to know that you’re really a wonderful person, truly.
@alch3mic - we’ve not talked very long, and I know I definitely already wrote you an incredibly sappy message the other day lmao, but this write-off wouldn’t feel right without saying something to you, especially since the two of us have been watching this stream together (though separately!) You’re just so incredibly passionate with all your projects and I honestly really look up to you and what you do. I’m always so happy seeing when you post because everything you write or draw always brings a smile to my face. Keep doin’ what you do man♥
@teirrart - maybe we don’t really talk (unless it’s some intense thirsting over milo), but I still really adore the work that you do! i think you were one of the first couple of people i followed when joining the fandom and re-joining on Tumblr here, because I adored the buttons you had on your store and bought them IMMEDIATELY haha. It’s still kinda funny to me to realize I have a set of buttons with Ink and Lust made by you and you’ve got my charms of Ink and Lust too.. it’s like a trade in a way, but I’ve just never had it happen lol. Your work is so cute, your characters are wonderful, and your stories are so emotionally driven. I adore them and adore what you do.
@tatatale - god, I still think about the drawing you did with Lust, Insans, and Ace. It brings such a smile to my face and it makes me so happy. I never thought someone who’s artwork and comics I’ve been reading since they started and really admired would ever make something with the characters I’ve made. And you do collabs and fanarts of people’s others works a lot! It’s so incredible to see. This kind of fan interaction is honestly so precious and rare. I adore your comics, I adore your art style, and you’re just so kind.
@owl-bones - we’ve only talked a few times, usually passively talking about the development of our dating sims, haha, but honestly your artwork is amazing, and the work you put into what you do is amazing. sometimes I sit here, a bit jealous of just how good Bonely Hearts Club is, but it’s honestly some silly jealousy lol. You put in an incredible amount of heart and soul into every bit of that game, and it’s so clearly evident even in just the short demo we’ve had so far -- everyone can see that. You’re an incredibly talented person.
...and, well, although you two will probably never ever see this, I suppose I’ll take the chance and throw my voice to the wind anyhow lol:
@markiplier and @crankgameplays - jesus christ, I’ve been watching you two for so long now that i can’t even believe how long it’s been. i was literally barely in high school. it’s so funny to me how I literally had the thought of “Man, I wish Ethan and Mark did more collabs” when YouTube decided to recommend me the escape room video from Unus Annus, a channel that I had somehow MISSED entirely. (At that point, of course. I watched every video from then onward and the ones from the couple of weeks I’d missed). It’s just so wild to me to really think that... a lot of what you two have done have really shaped me today. People often talk down upon the idea of looking up to others because people can do things wrong in the future and then - oh no - now you’re suddenly regretting supporting them. But you two have never once given me that kind of vibe, and I don’t feel like I’ll ever get that from you two in the future. Your work ethics and dedication to what you do really inspires me. It’s gotten me to where I am. Unus Annus ironically made me want death less when I was at such a low point in my life, and made me realize the value of using the time I have been given. It just somehow clicked for me. So, if either of you ever do see this? Just - thanks.
Memento mori.
but also, memento vivire. Remember to live.
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julyarchives · 4 years ago
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Don’t You Hear Me Howling? || (M) || 01
Finding out you are a female Alpha sparkled some rivalry inside your pack, and resulted in you losing your best friend and your life turning upsidedown, so leaving for college was the fresh start you needed. Years later, you are about to finish your degree and suddenly this past comes back to mess with your head.
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→ Pairing: Yeo One x Female Reader | Kino x Female Reader
→ Genre: Smut; A/B/O AU; Omegaverse; College AU.
→ Words:  3.4K
→ Contains: Mentions of Alcohool; Power Play; Hair Pulling.
→ A/n: Hey guys! So this is our new multi-chaptered story! We have never written this kind of AU before, so please be kind if you spot any mistakes and feel free to educate us. This story will follow cisgender real-life anatomy (a.k.a. it won’t have knotting, mpreg and changes of those sorts). This took us out of our comfort zone and we enjoyed writing it so much that we couldn’t wait any longer to share it with you guys. We hope you all like it as much as we do!
→ Index: 01 • 02 • 03 • 04  • 05  • 06  • 07  • 08
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Changgu and you have been friends since before you could remember. You grew up in the same pack, Changgu being the firstborn of the alpha. It was obvious to everyone that he was going to be Alpha as well, the next one to take over the pack when his dad steps down. You two grew up as best friends, and the consequence of being brought up together with an alpha-to-be is that you end up getting some of his personality traits. You were very stubborn and territorial, often getting into trouble for feeling jealous when someone tried to approach your friends. But it was all brushed off as you just mirroring your friend.
Changgu got his first heat at the age of 15, and everyone celebrated the fact that his scent was very much dominant. Everyone started treating him differently, even your other friends in common, but to you, he was the same old Changgu, and one more time your lack of responsiveness was just “she just didn’t get her heat yet, I bet she’s going to change in a few years. I swear, those two will end up marrying”
You heard that since you were a child, and for a while you let yourself believe that. He was your best friend in the world, so why not? You would be his omega, fine, he’s always treated you nicely, so it wasn’t the worst idea.  You two remained friends, even though he was becoming a different person each day, cockier and sometimes even rude, growling and bossing everyone around. You were the only one that never took his shit, but he never seemed to mind that
Until the day of your first heat. It was all the pack would talk about. You were in your senior year, and when everyone realized that your scent was much stronger than Changgu’s it was a shock. It took a while for you to believe that you were really an Alpha, and to understand what that meant for Changgu. He was actually a Beta, that’s why everyone assumed he was an Alpha when you didn’t have your scent. It explains his personality and yours being so similar. It explains everything. 
At first, you didn’t think it was that big of a deal for your friendship, but Changgu suddenly started hating you. You two had plans to go to college together and even live together at some point, but after he found out he wasn’t the Alpha, he redirected his frustration towards you. As an Alpha, you could hold him back sometimes, stopping him from being the worst dickhead. But sometimes you just let it go for the sake of the friendship. He wasn’t willing to do the same.
Once you two moved out to college, it was the breaking point. He stopped talking to you at all, barely acknowledging your presence when you two came across each other in the hall.
Eventually, you just gave up and accepted you weren’t friends anymore. He found his omega friends where he could be the dominant one, and the fact that he provoked heat in them gave him quite a reputation on campus. You were fine, though, have moved on with your life, and last year to graduate as a chemical engineer, developing a research thesis on the studies of blockers and those types of hormones.  
This thesis was so important for you because it's a pioneer one in blockers for female Alphas, using plant based hormones to help block scents but not body growth, actually helping with it, so females can not be jeopardized by smaller body structure than males. Your life was hard because of that condition, that's why changing that for future Alpha Women meant so much to you, and nothing could stop you from achieving your biggest goal in life.
All of that didn’t stop you from developing certain anger towards him for abandoning you just for some stupid hierarchy shit. 
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It was a particularly shitty day. All your lab experiments went wrong, and you got so out of control when a girl tried to help that you actually lost it and growled so loud that caused everyone in the room to stop immediately what they were doing and lower their heads towards you.
You just sighed, holding back all your instincts, and left everything behind. Rushing through the way to your apartment, you stumbled onto Wooseok
“Wow, (y/n), what is going on? I could feel chills all the way across the yard” He held onto your shoulders, towering his 1.9m over you.
Another growl escaped your lips, his touch was not doing you any good. He just released you, holding his own hand behind his back and muttering an apology. Wooseok is an omega from your pack, one of the friends you used to have in common with Changgu. You guys never lost touch, especially because he was a very submissive omega. But overall, a good friend.
“Everything is going to shit today, I got caught in the rain, my experiments went wrong, I frightened everyone in the lab and I’m pretty sure I’m getting my rut soon, so help me God if anyone else fucking touches me I will have a fit.”
“Oh, I see.” He twisted his lips “Let’s throw a party, my frat house is always down for a rager. You can find a nice unmarked person to have your fun with, and getting wasted as a bonus”
“That’s why you are my favorite omega” you reached up above you and patted his hair, and his reaction was smirk proud of himself “see you tonight.”.
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Wooseok’s frat was huge. He lived with about 9 other boys, and they were known for having the best parties, so you had high hopes for tonight. The place was already crowded and the music loud. You quickly looked around searching for your friend, with no problem finding him, given his height.
“Hey, you made it!” he said when you approached, and introduced you to his group of friend “guys, this is my Alpha (y/n)”
One guy chuckled, you looked directly at him
“She’s your Alpha?” he asked, condescendingly, eyeing you up and down.
Your smile quickly faded.
“Got a problem with that?” You lifted one brow, crossing your arms in front of your chest
“Nothing, your just…” He looked at Wooseok, then at you “short.”
Alphas are usually the tallest of the pack. You weren’t. Being a female Alpha was already difficult, harder to be respected, and your height has always been a reason to be discredited of your position, you always took shit for that. You hated it.
Your blood boiled, everyone around you could feel it, it was easily noticed how everyone flinched. Your eyes were fixated on the boy, ready to jump at his throat. How could he be so disrespectful to an Alpha?
“Shouldn’t have said that, man” Wooseok said immediately
You growled hand curled into fists. You started to move to go against the boy, but a hand caught your wrist. 
Changgu was looking at you seriously, a very concentrated frown, though not a mad one, just focused. You two didn’t exchange words, just stared at each other for a while. As your Beta, the influence he has on you due to your connection is undeniable. With just that look, he meant “I got this”. And you trusted him.
The stupid boy had his head lowered still, he knew he fucked up. Everyone was paying attention to what happened, your scent probably stronger than ever. Changgu released you.
“C’mon, get away from here. And learn to have some respect” He smacked the boy in the back of the head. 
You were now calming down, and feeling embarrassed for causing a scene right when you arrived. You turned to Wooseok, who was watching you attentively.
“Get me to the booze, would ya?” You asked, and he just nodded and obeyed.
Arriving at the kitchen, Wooseok passed you a can of beer.
“I’m sorry for him, he was a jerk” he said, starting the conversation
“It’s alright, I’m used to it, honestly. Just lost my head because of everything today, I told you.”
“I know. I’m sorry”
“Yeah, it’s ok.” You took a long sip. Staring straightforwardly, you continued, not daring to look at Wooseok for the next sentence. “Didn’t know Changgu was going to be here”
“You didn’t? He moved in this semester.” He said carefully., knowing your history. “I was hoping you two wouldn’t stumble onto each other, it is a big party, it had a chance of happening.”
“Lucky me, my Beta senses my every feeling like a radar” you said with irony.
“At least he stopped you from committing a homicide in my house” your friend joked.
“Shut up” you punched his arm lightly.
Encountering Changgu was something else entirely. This was the most he acknowledged you in years. You do understand, though, that it was a natural reaction, very instinctive. No matter how much time you spend apart, if you two are near enough, he will sense every strong feeling of yours and act as your right arm. 
You hated that he was looking good. He recently dyed his hair a pale blond, his cut-out black tank top displaying his strong arms were very sexy, his piercing dark eyes staring directly at you, knowing your every feeling. God, you bet the sex would be amazing, and…
“Erm, y/n,” Wooseok shifted “You horny very out loud” 
“Oh,” you adjusted yourself “Sorry” you laughed.
The downside to being an alpha about to get your rut is that everyone around you gets horny. Even without you want to.
“I’ll fix that, let me introduce you to someone” 
Wooseok guided you to the crowd. Your eyes immediately found Changgu’s again. You couldn’t keep off of each other’s now. Years without any kind of contact were replaced by his touch and all the mental talk you just had. Now the bond grew stronger. It was inevitable to find each other no matter where, and it was pissing you off. You wouldn’t be the one to cave in, not at all. He was the one who put distance between the two of you, so he will be the one to change that if he wants.
Wooseok moved out of the way, letting one of his friends stop in front of you.
“y/n, this is Kino. Kino, this is y/n, the one I talked about earlier today.”
“It’s nice to meet you, y/n” he smiled at you, reaching his hand respectfully.
He was cute. He seemed young and cheerful, yet his eyes hovering you all over showed his intentions were beyond cheerful.
“It’s nice to meet you too, Kino” You dragged his name, sounding good on your lips.
He smelled like fresh strawberries, the scent filling up your nostrils very intoxicatingly. He was in heat. Just what you needed exactly. You had to remember to thank Wooseok later.
“I’ll leave you guys to it” Your friend excused himself, probably overwhelmed with the number of pheromones in the air.
“So, I’ve never been with a female alpha before. This should be fun” He grinned, his flirty personality enticing you
“Well, I guess there’s a first time for everything” You winked at him.
“Better not waste time, then” He reached for your hand, which you gladly allowed him to, and he guided you away from the crowd.
As you approached the empty hallway that led to the bedrooms, you stopped and backed Kino against the wall.
“Your scent is driving me crazy” You said in a low seductive voice, pressing your body against his.
His immediate reaction was to hold your waist and pull you closer, Hips rubbing together so you could feel his bulge through his jeans
“I could say just the same.” was the last thing he said before closing the distance between you two.
He kissed you hard and hungry, contrasting with his soft lips. His hands immediately slither inside your shirt, his warm touch burning trails against the skin of your back. Your nails lightly grazing against his neck, using your palms to cup his face and dominantly guide him to kiss you as you pleased. He was more than compliant.
“Shall we move this to the bedroom?” you said between pants. He looked amazing with his hair messy from the way you grabbed him, and lips in a pretty shade of pink, plump and swollen.
He just nodded, chest rising up and down fast.
This time you took his hand and pulled him to the nearest door you could find, luckily it led to a bedroom. 
“Sit.” you ordered shortly and he quickly obeyed. 
He sat at the edge of the bed, legs spread, leaning back supporting himself on his arms. He looked absolutely gorgeous, his eyes following your every move as you walked towards him and stood in between his knees.
He sat up, hands reaching under your shirt and pushing it up oh so slowly, taking his time feeling you. He looked at you with lust in his eyes. After he discarded your top, he planted slow wet kisses across your stomach, his hand working on the buttons of your jeans. He took the chance to take in your alpha scent, that’s when you say his pupil dilating, taking over almost his whole iris.
“You’re so gorgeous” he said, tugging your pants down. You caressed the top of his head, running your fingers through his hair.
“undress” you commanded him again.
When both of you were left naked, you straddled him, kissing him passionately as he grabbed your ass, grinding you against his bulge. You pushed him to lay down, not wasting time to sink down on his dick. Both of you couldn’t handle waiting any longer. You started riding him and he immediately started moaning and groaning high pitched in a small voice that turned you on even more. He carved his nails on your thighs as you kept the fast pace. 
He started rocking his hips up, following your movements, getting deeper inside of you, and hitting just the right spot to make you scream.
“Fuck, baby, keep doing just like that” you told him in between moans
Kino moaned louder at the pet name. You opened a smug smile.
“Like being called that, huh?” you ask and he nodded, moaning your name “like being my baby boy?”
He muttered a few curse words and your name repeatedly.
“That’s right, baby, keep being loud for me. Sounds so good” You kept encouraging him.
He looked fucked out already below you. His sweaty hair sticking to his forehead, a blush spreading across his cheeks, and his mouth hanging open.
You leaned down, not stopping moving your hips, to kiss him again, you just couldn’t resist. The harder you kissed him, the closer you got to your high. The arousal pooling in your core the harder he thrust into you. Soon like that you were coming hard and loud, and you thanked the loud music, otherwise, everyone would have heard you. Kino fucked hard, just the way you like it, and it got you exactly what you needed, obeying your every order like a good omega.
But he wasn’t done yet. 
You got off of him, laying in the bed on all fours and he soon was inside you again, taking you from behind with loud skin-to-skin sounds, his moaning getting louder and louder. 
“Pull my hair, Kino” you managed to say.
He quickly grabbed it in a make-do ponytail, pulling it so it hurt how you wanted, making you hiss in pleasure. But it got him too confident.
“Fuck, y/n, it feels so good like that” he said and followed with a light slap on your ass.
It got you snarling.
 "Oh no, don't think you're in charge.” you warned “Hit me again and we're done, baby boy"
He muttered a quick apology between gasps. 
Being put back in his place, Kino was working his hips enthusiastically now, while you backed it up against him. He definitely knew what he was doing. He took you by surprise when he reached below you for your clit, rubbing it in circular motions in sync with his thrusts. You buried your head in a pillow, muffling the high-pitched grunts leaving your throat due to the overstimulation, but you were loving every second of it. Kinos thrusts started to become more sloppy and faster, indicating he was about to cum. You both reached your high at the same time, the pheromones boosting it, making it the most intense orgasm you had in a long time. Curses and names being thrown around by the both of you, his hands digging in your hips while yours twisted the sheets around. 
Kino collapsed by your side at the same time you laid down on your back. He approached and kissed you again, this time not so urgent, but rather slow and sensual. His hand now patted your side softly, causing small goosebumps to rise on your skin. He kissed down your neck and buried his nose on your hair, taking in your scent 
“You did good…” you started teasing “baby boy”
Kino grinned, proud of himself.
“You were pretty amazing yourself.” he answered, biting his lip.
You hugged him closer, letting him cuddle you and enjoying the way he smelled as well. Strawberries will never be the same, you chuckled to yourself. You knew that for an omega, being with an Alpha was overwhelming, so you knew, that, even if the sex wasn’t the kinkiest, the aftercare was necessary.
You took the opportunity to get to know each other better. You learned that he is a dance major, which explained the flawless hip work, and he was 2 years younger than you, which was a first for you. Nevertheless, he was good company. After exchanging your numbers, agreeing to repeat the latest activity would be good both for your rut and his heat, and a quick makeout session, you both got dressed and headed back to the party due to the need for beverages.
The party was still at its high point, everyone was drunk and dancing like no one was watching. Kino and you earn a few lingering looks for showing up smelling so strongly like pheromones and sex. But you didn’t care, you were used to it. You two found a good spot on the dance floor and you told him to stay there, so you would get drinks for them.
Back at the kitchen, you quickly grabbed a pair of red cups with a blue vodka that god knows what flavor it was. When you were heading out, someone blocked your way purposefully.
“What do you want, Changgu?” You lifted your head, staring at him face-to-face, Alpha and Beta matching heights.
“So I am left to clean up your mess while you go around and fuck the first guy you see in front of you?”
You thanked whatever bigger force that the kitchen was empty, you didn’t want to cause another scene, but Changgu was getting on your nerves.
“Oh that’s so sweet, you think that was about you?” You spilled ironically.
“Just get your shit together before I have to rescue your ass for you to grind it on someone else” He said, trying to get the upper hand.
“I don’t know if you forgot, but I’m still your fucking Alpha, so back the fuck off before talking to me like that. I didn’t need you to come to rescue me of anything, I’m pretty sure I can handle myself. And finally,...” you looked at him up and down “Why do you care who I grind on? Upset it’s not on you?” 
He curled his hands in fists, staring at you with that same frown, only this time you knew he was pissed. You got closer and whispered at him.
“Next time, all you have to do is ask, sweetheart.” You bit your lips into a grin.
You backed out to stare at him again when you saw Kino approaching.
“Y/n!” he called you, Changgu immediately snapped his head to look at him, fuming. “Is everything okay?” He stared between you and Changgu, defensive mode ready to fight in case needed.
“Don’t worry, baby” You said to Kino, but actually staring at your Beta, who was gritting his teeth at you “Changgu was just leaving.”
You walked past him, bumping your shoulders on the way, and heading back to the dancefloor with Kino.
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jeonjeonggukenergy · 5 years ago
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Anti-Hero
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summary ~ in search of wine at a party that’s so not your scene, you run into jungkook, the weeb from your film class, and become determined to learn just how much he lives up to his big reputation.
pairing ~ jungkook x reader
genre ~ fluff, smut - college!au
wordcount ~ 8.5k
warnings ~ 18+ only! smut, explicit discussion of kinks/sexual preferences (yay healthy communication), dom/sub undertones during both discussion and sex (dom Jungkook, sub reader), mentions of daddy kink and degradation but both are a no, marking, biting, hair pulling, spanking, they both have a srs pain kink lmao, brief oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, creampie
a/n ~ SO excited to finally have this chapter out for yall! it’s a huge one and i’ve been working on it for quite a while, this includes the first full smut scene for this fic and i would love to know how yall like it or any other feedback. i really enjoyed writing the character development in this chapter too! they’re so cute and whipped for each other already hhhhhh. thank you so much for loving this story so far, i’m really looking forward to writing the rest. hope you enjoy! ❣️
previous: chapter 1 | chapter 2 ~ next: chapter 4 (coming soon!) 
~ read on ao3 ~
CHAPTER 3 ~ particular, perfect
You concluded your walk home by ditching your shoes at the door, swinging your bag off your shoulders to the floor, and plopping down onto the couch immediately. Pulling all three nearby blankets over yourself, you realized you still weren't quite comfortable. You looked around for a second, puzzled, until an absentminded clutch of your boobs reminded you why. Triumphantly, you reached into a sleeve to untangle your bra and chucked it across the room with a deep stretch of relief. Okay, time to overthink again.
Jungkook? What the fuck?
Wait. A bag of chips on the kitchen counter caught your eye before you could descend any further into panic. The perfect emotional crutch. You clutched it to your chest like a safeguard against your own internal monologue, anxiously shoving handful after handful into your mouth. After about thirty minutes spent motionless on the couch with one hand shoved in the chip bag and the other distractedly scrolling through Twitter, your eyes suddenly widened and your hand froze, dropping your next bite of chips back into the bag. Fuck. You had just eaten nearly an entire family-size bag of chips before what could end up being your first fuck in over a year. Well, maybe this was part of why you hadn't gotten fucked in over a year. No, don't go there. You shoved down your own insecurity, knowing you'd just been too busy for a relationship and honestly, probably still were. But that wasn't going to stop you today.
You shook the chip dust off of your hands and got up to head to the shower, turning up your trashiest throwback playlist of getting-ready bops and resolving to at least shave your legs. Going in with no expectations was probably the best strategy here, but it never hurt to be prepared.
~
Having cleaned his apartment in record time, Jungkook was now at the gym. After triple-checking that his roommate Jin would be in rehearsal until 10pm at the earliest, he quickly scanned all the common spaces and his bedroom and realized he didn't actually have that much work to do besides politely closing the door to Jin's still-decent-but-somewhat-messier room. To be honest, Jungkook had mainly bought himself the time after class so he could shave just in case. But then he figured if he had to shower, he might as well hit the gym first. So here he was, burning off an unprecedented amount of nervous energy. Settling comfortably into the leg curl machine, he turned his music up and started on a low weight to put in reps until his thighs burned and his head felt pleasantly empty.
After completing his normal leg day rotation and dutifully stretching, Jungkook prepared to head home. He walked out of the gym feeling more energized and centered, barely even flinching when he switched his AirPods off to say bye to the nice girl at the front desk and the action accidentally blasted "Whistle" by Flo Rida from his phone speaker for the whole lobby to hear. As he walked back into his apartment, the kitchen clock let him know it was only 4:30. He had plenty of time. Jungkook hopped straight into the shower, shampooing his hair, shaving everywhere he normally did, and savoring several extra moments to relax his muscles under the hot stream of water. Finally, he toweled off to wrap up in the black t-shirt and cozy matching sweatpants he'd carefully stacked on the counter. Offhandedly singing to himself in the steamy mirror, he checked the time on his phone, deciding he might as well go ahead and text you before he got nervous again and did something stupid. Like chickening out completely.
hey its jk! im ready when u are :) my apt is 344 glencoe rd #1521 (yes its on the 15th floor sry D: )
His charming old-school smileys lit up your phone while you still had a leg perched on the bathtub's edge.
"Fuck!" you reacted. The hiss resounded, thanks to the too-good acoustics of your cramped bathroom. Your razor clattering to the floor, you paused your max-volume 2000s music to check the message, and then the time. Only 5! That wasn't dinnertime yet. Plugging his address into Google Maps, though, you realized it was a 15- to 20-minute drive from yours on the opposite end of campus. Even if you got ready at light-speed, you would get there closer to 5:30. Which was a bit more reasonable. He was being reasonable! You should be ready by now!
You leaned over to pick up your razor and cursed again as the water stream grazed the blouse you'd left on out of laziness. You'd showered this morning, so there was no need to repeat that with your shave, but now you'd have to change outfits completely. Feeling like an idiot, naked from the waist down but now all the way wet, you peeled the shirt over your head slowly to preserve your good hair day and glanced down at the dilemma you'd been facing. The patch of hair between your legs stared back at you like the final boss of stupid societal beauty standards. You'd only shaved down there once, as an anniversary present for your first boyfriend the summer before college, and it had been a fun, smooth novelty for about two hours and then itchy, red, gross-looking, and miserable for about three weeks. Also, it had kind of made you feel like a little girl, which creeped you out when you thought about why guys would prefer it. You'd been debating whether to try it again for the past fifteen minutes, because if there was ever a right time, this was probably it. But now you didn't have time, if you were going to be respectful and not keep Jungkook waiting. Well, this was the real you. He could take it or leave it.
Slathering a quick coat of lotion over your freshly shaved legs, you prepared to get dressed in a soft pastel sweatshirt and a flattering pair of workout shorts. Wait, should you wear lingerie? Was that too try-hard? You didn't really even need to wear underwear with these lined shorts, which could be a cool-girl move, you supposed. You settled on a cute white sports bra to go with the shorts, not wanting to deal with a real bra and hoping it still appealed to Jungkook's casual, athletic style. You checked yourself in the mirror briefly before grabbing your bag, confirming you looked chill enough but still felt like your best color-coordinated self. Heading out, you shoved a tin of chrysanthemum green tea in your water bottle pocket. Why not?
~
You whizzed over to Jungkook's apartment, yelling along to "Sex With Me" by Rihanna from your throwback playlist to hype you up in the car. When you knocked on his door after a nerve-wrackingly long elevator ride, Jungkook welcomed you with a "C'mon in!" amidst a mouthful of shrimp chips.
"It's not really dinnertime yet," (yeah, no kidding, you thought) "I went ahead and worked out but it's still kind of early, so I figured we could just have a snack and do the homework first."
"Sounds good," you affirmed. "I'm not really that hungry," (read: there's no way I can eat chips AGAIN right now, I'm going to bloat so badly) "but I brought tea so I can go ahead and make that if you want some too!"
"Oh cool, thanks!" Jungkook accepted. "Are you sure you're not hungry though?"
You almost gave into his sweet pout, but managed to convince him, and soon you both sat at the table with laptops open and twin cups of tea. You had a blast working together for the first time, acting out your "conversation" for the discussion board and pretending to respond spontaneously to each other's points like you hadn't already excitedly rambled back and forth through them in real life. You hit "send" five minutes apart, your idea to not seem too suspicious, and kept raving over Rear Window in between. As the sun lowered outside his living room window, you moved on to making the ramen.
After three offers to help Jungkook, all of which he denied, you simply made another steep of the tea, leaving a mug on the counter for him. Standing at the bar counter sipping yours, you enjoyed all the tiny, cute noises he made while chopping green onions and sprinkling extra garlic in the seasoning, like an anime character who came with his own sound effects. You could tell he made these recipe additions every time, because bulk quantities of the same simple ingredients lined the counters of his cozy kitchen. When he beat two eggs and dropped them into the pot, though, he couldn't seem to find a lid, and eventually settled on trapping the steam with a plate. You both waited on the egg for a silent moment, your foot bouncing under the bar while Jungkook restlessly acquired a slight wiggle. As he took a sip of his tea, a strand of hair fell over his eyes, and he yeeted it out of his face. Your inner language nerd cringed, but there really was no more apt word to describe the action.
You offhandedly said you liked his hair long, and he replied with a smile, "Maybe I'll have to keep it then."
"Do you like it too?" you wondered.
"Honestly no, it's kind of inconvenient."
"Oh, then why would you keep it?" you immediately asked back.
"Well..." he dragged out. "You like it? Maybe I should keep it if it looks better this way."
Your eyes crinkled appreciatively at his thoughtfulness, but then you backtracked. "Wait, no, it's okay! If you don't like it, don't feel like you have to keep it just because of something I said. You can do whatever you want."
"Hm, yeah." A demure smile tugged up the corner of his mouth as he lifted the plate from the ramen pot.
You watched him drag a chopstick through the floating, now-cooked egg to tear it into ribbons, then divide the noodles between two generously-sized bowls. He carefully wiped down the drips of broth from each bowl before sprinkling in his fresh toppings, then walked with you to the table.
Serving you with a pleased smile and a slight nod, he announced, "Dinner!"
"Wow," you mused playfully. "So gourmet."
"I'm really particular about my ramen," he admitted. "I have it down to a perfect routine at this point."
You took your first slurp of his particular, perfect ramen. "Well, it's really good. I'm impressed. And thanks for making me dinner, you didn't have to do all that."
"Oh, come on, it's instant ramen," he laughed. "Nothing special. And you brought the tea, so thanks. And thanks for coming over. And doing the homework with me. And...yeah." Rambling again. Why did he seem so...nervous? You were nervous. He couldn't be nervous. What reason did he have to be? But the twitch of his mouth under his wide eyes, his slightly reddened ears, his hand skittering over his neck—fuck—to ruffle his hair...every action turned another page of his open book. It felt infuriatingly unfair that genetics had assigned someone so sweet and shy and unsure of himself to that fucking body.
While you both ate and talked, you kept catching glimpses of any small flashes of skin you could find, as his long sleeves fell to expose his forearms and the wide neckline of his boxy black shirt gaped around his collarbones. What was wrong with you? Even if this did eventually turn into a dick appointment, the boy still had literally all of his clothes on. You tried to refocus on finishing your noodles, while your brain screamed at itself in shame that you could get this turned on by the sight of someone covered from neck to ankle.
Jungkook ate surprisingly slowly, probably because he kept pausing to excitedly explain his favorite things about the Cowboy Bebop episode you were about to watch together. You smiled into your tea through every out-of-context fun fact and "wait, sorry, that might have been a spoiler!"
Finally, he reached the bottom of his bowl and insisted on both taking your dishes to the sink and leaving them for him to clean later. "You sure you want to start on episode 2? Not 1?"
"Yeah, I remember well enough and your summary helped a lot too!"
"Okay, if you're positive!" he double-checked, grabbing the remote.
Gingerly lowering yourselves to the couch in sync, you avoided looking at each other as you both tried to calculate a comfortable distance between you. His hand looked ready to either hold yours or lower to your thigh, but he retracted at the last second, smoothing it over his own leg anxiously and still clearly itching to make a move. You shuffled closer to him until your thighs barely touched, and he shifted to slink an arm around you, letting your head rest on his well-muscled shoulder. After pressing “play”, he began wiggling slightly again, subconsciously grooving to the old-newspaper-style intro. Spike Spiegel appeared on the screen, his broad shoulders squared into a slouch as he listlessly watched TV. Jungkook kicked one leg over another and stretched his arms out symmetrically to echo the pose. Raising an eyebrow, he waited until you acknowledged him with a faux grimace and a hand to your ear, imitating the old man in a lab who’d just called up Spike for a new mission. You both burst into laughter and settled back into your former arrangement, Jungkook holding you imperceptibly tighter. Though you tried to stay staring straight ahead, wanting to genuinely appreciate the anime, you kept catching his doe eyes in the corner of your sight as you both giggled and gasped your way through the episode.
After avoiding eye contact too many times, you finally tilted your head for a cute sideways view of his face. He leaned toward you too, shyly closing the gap to touch his warm lips to your nose, then lower. You responded immediately, rolling your body with his so your chests met as he pulled you up into a full, deeper kiss. The longer you explored each other's mouths, the more Jungkook punctuated your movements with whimpers. He seemed hesitant to let his hands roam away from your face and neck, but his high, breathy moans made it clear that he was just as into this as you. Your hands had naturally found his taut waist, and at some point you started to bring them back up to his face too—but as your short nails grazed his chest, a particularly sensual, voice-cracking moan interrupted you. You drew back in slight surprise, blinking your eyes open to scan from his face to his body.
He followed your gaze, both slowly settling on the massive tent in his pants. You froze. Your breath grew heavier, confronted with evidence of his physical attraction to you, if nothing else. After regaining his composure, he laid a useless hand over his lap in a delicate attempt to distract you and brought his other hand up to tap your face lightly.
"Is this okay?"
His eyes glittered with equal parts hunger and concern.
"Yes!" you nodded, too quickly, too eagerly. "Yes, this is totally okay. Sorry if I'm being weird, I just...it's been a while." You cringed internally at your own words, but couldn't seem to avoid putting your foot further in your mouth. "I haven't really, like, hooked up like this before—like, I've had sex, but never really outside of a relationship. But don't worry, I get this is more your thing, and I'm totally down if you are. I just don't really know what I'm doing, and you clearly do."
Jungkook blinked at your admission, then his face twisted into something curious, inscrutable. Would he decide you weren't worth the potential for drama? His lips flattened out to a tight line, then pursed to speak, and you looked down at your lap, hoping he wasn't as embarrassed of you as you now were of yourself.
"Well, I've never had sex sober."
Your eyes flashed back up to his. A complex half-smirk offset the furrow in his brow as he exhaled in nervous relief. "So, I don't actually know what I'm doing here either."
You tried to delay your response as you processed the implications. "You mean..." You tilted your head for better eye contact, hoping to convey empathy but not pity while you silently contemplated how to proceed. "Never?"
"Yeah, I've always shown up to parties and the hookups just...happened. Nothing I didn't want, nothing bad like that, but always spontaneous. So I guess we're kind of meeting in the middle, because I've never really had to plan ahead for a situation like this and, uh, figure out what I want. Beyond, yknow, wanting to get laid in the moment, of course." Jungkook laughed off the end of his explanation, but the smile never quite hit his eyes.
"Well, okay, let's pause right there." You sighed. Something in his words didn't sit right with you. "What do you want? I want you to be sure about this, of course, but more than that, even—what do you like?"
"I..." he chuckled, sheepish, shaking his hair over his face again. "What, you want me to just tell you? Like, what I'm into?"
"Yeah," you shrugged, trying to project more confidence than you felt in hopes of encouraging him to keep opening up. "I want you to be able to communicate, I want you to be comfortable. And I want to know what you like, so I can make it as good for you as possible."
With your hands still laid flat on his chest, you felt his heart rate jump a tiny bit, and took the liberty of digging your nails in just slightly deeper. His breath caught him, and then he caught himself. "I don't know, I just want what you want."
Jungkook struggled to appear nonchalant as you rolled your eyes with an "Oh, come on," challenging his avoidance. Every instinct was telling him yes. He could hear his mind screaming at him to be intentional for once and let you take him, if not farther, then deeper than ever before. But he still hesitated, because being intentional in this case required him to be real. He had always been a fairly private person, but something about you made him feel so comfortable so fast that it counterintuitively made him more nervous. Of course Jungkook knew you weren't all innocent at this point, but the risk remained that you wouldn't really be down for everything he secretly wanted to explore. Even worse, though he didn't truly think you would, you could easily turn around and spin anything he revealed into yet another graphic rumor. Especially since you had no skin in the game yourself. He glanced down at your fingers, tensed into his chest, and narrowed his eyes.
"Why don't you tell me what you like first? And then I can tell you where we overlap," he grinned competitively. Your eyes widened as he tossed the challenge back your way. Not backing down, you flattened your hands and steeled yourself to settle the stakes.
"Fine—but only if you promise not to just go along with whatever I say. I'll let you know anything that's a hard no for me, but otherwise I want to hear at least one thing that's not on my list. I really do want what you want, that's how I am too, okay? So..." you paused to slide your fingertips over his collar and drag it down with a light scratch, now directly on his skin. You smiled with your eyes, enjoying the way he naturally responded with a hitch of his breath again. "Surely you can think of something specific."
He nodded quickly, before he could convince himself to back out. "Yeah. Promise."
"Okay," you confirmed, slightly nervous but determined to go through with this, for Jungkook's sake if anything. Seeing his body come alive with each new twist of the situation was building your curiosity, not to mention turning you on beyond belief. You could barely stand the warmth of his skin under your hands, so you drew them back to fold in your lap as you began. "So. Uh. To start. I've never really laid it all out like this either. I really like neck kisses? Like, a lot." Equally unused to this kind of directness, you wrung your hands together nervously, but sucked up the boldness to keep elaborating. "That's definitely, like, a big thing that turns me on...and then getting marked up and everything is really hot to me too. Like you can honestly go really rough with me on that, bite me even. I don't know if this is weird but even though it's annoying to cover up, I love taking off the makeup at the end of the day and seeing all the bruises on myself. Knowing I was walking around all day with that as my little secret." You swallowed shyly before continuing, but Jungkook interrupted the brief silence immediately with a hushed "Fuck."
You turned to face him fully and he didn't even move to meet your stare, eyeing the space above your sweatshirt's wide neckline like he was ready to devour you. Emboldened, your smile grew.
"So...yeah. I like being bitten, marked up. Mostly, uh," you rubbed a slightly trembling hand over your shoulder, "I'm just really into pain in general. Obviously not the bad 'I'm too dry and you're jackhammering me' kind of pain, or like, anal. Anal is a hard no. But things like biting, or hair pulling, or overstimulation. Or, like—I don't really know how to explain this, but...getting held too hard? That deep pain like when you get a massage when you're sore and it hurts but it's good, yknow?"
Jungkook looked like he was about to vibrate out of his skin, breathing shallow and rapid. His eyes flicked up to meet yours, just in time for you to whisper in conclusion:
"I love that feeling."
You suddenly looked away, reticent. A thick silence swelled between you, until he composed himself enough to punctuate it. "Okay. Yeah. Pain. So like, BDSM?"
"I mean, kind of? Sure? I don't have much experience with that and I don't really need the whole power dynamic aspect; I just like the, uh, physical pain. I wouldn't be opposed to trying further, but one thing I do know is I really don't like being degraded. And I'm not into the whole daddy kink thing either. I'm just not gonna call you that, sorry," you laughed, and fortunately he giggled too. "But I know that's not, like, necessary to the rest of BDSM, and the part about giving up control is still...interesting, for sure."
"Wait," Jungkook cocked his head, making a mental note of your last sentence before he went back to the previous one. "What do you mean, being degraded?"
You half-chuckled, half-cringed, never having needed to explain something like this, especially to a guy you hopefully were about to fuck. Cheers to better communication, you supposed.
"You know, how some people when they do dirty talk are like 'yeah, you little slut, you're such a whore.' I don't like being called any of that. Like it's fine that other people like it, there's nothing wrong with that, it's just really uncomfortable for me."
His brows knit together as you explained, and he shook his head so fast it almost looked cartoonish, like a little kid refusing vegetables. "Yeah, no. Don't worry, not really my thing either."
You sighed in relief. "That's nice. I feel like it's, like, weirdly common with guys. Maybe just the kind of thing people learn from porn."
"But you still like it rough, huh? Did you learn that...from porn?" he half-joked, trying to overcome both his shyness and his gritted-teeth arousal.
"No, I don’t like porn. Most of it’s really unethical. I learned from experience," you sassed back. "I don't have a whole lot, but enough to know what I like."
"Well. Hm." He worked his tongue over his teeth, poking one cheek out over his tensed jaw. You couldn't get enough of watching him grow fascinated by your every revelation, and you were preparing to keep pressing further when he beat you to it, posing a question. "Is there anything you haven't tried before, but really want to?"
Your face heated up instantly, tasting your own medicine. You looked back to your hands, breaking his intense eye contact to give yourself the courage to be even more uncomfortably honest. "I...I...um." Your first attempt at disclosing your fantasy came out as a squeak. Swallowing, you set your shoulders and tried again, selfishly reminding yourself Jungkook seemed so eager to please that this was 99% likely to get you exactly what you wanted. "I've always been, uh, really into the idea of, um, getting spanked. I've been, uh, too nervous to ever bring it up, before now obviously, but it's definitely one of the biggest kinks I've always wanted to try. Maybe being tied up too, I think I'd like it if I tried but I haven't thought about that as much. But, yeah...spanking, definitely."
"Fuuuuuuuuck."
A lengthened version of Jungkook's earlier under-breath exclamation made you peer up at him. Your thighs already pressed together from the tension of admitting something totally new, you found yourself needing even more friction just from the sight of Jungkook with his head thrown back on the couch, a veiny hand threaded in his hair to pull the long waves back from his forehead. The full reveal of his sharp eyebrows brought a whole new level of intensity to Jungkook's already beautifully carved features. He glanced over at you, then squeezed his eyes shut with a terse exhale. You couldn't place why, but you felt a deep attraction to the way he expertly restrained himself from acting on the lust written over his face—not under your control, but his own.
"Oh, fuck. What the fuck. How the fuck would you fucking know," he swore more in a single burst than he cumulatively had ever in your presence.
"What?" you toyed, heart rate still high but relaxed enough to enjoy agitating him. "Something ring a bell?"
Jungkook shuddered out a long breath, hand ruffling his hair as his other forearm still tried desperately to subdue his boner.
"Everything," he hissed, more willing to elaborate now that you had done the same, and especially now that he could tell you really did enjoy him being more assertive. "Shit. I...I want...I know you said not to just say this but I really do want everything you want. I can't wait to mark you up. I can't wait to hold you down and bruise your neck. I want it all, I want to make you hurt so good. And then—" Breathless. He looked almost embarrassed. "Then you had to go and somehow guess basically my biggest fucking kink, I can't fucking believe you." Both hands had come up to seize his long locks as he held himself back physically, while finally letting his guard down mentally to declare everything he intended to do to you. Letting out a short laugh, he finally met your eyes. "I wanna spank your ass bright red. Fuck. This is crazy. You're perfect."
Your core throbbed at every bold word. Leaning in close to him, you let your lips approach Jungkook's beautifully sculpted jawline as he panted, his chin tossed up to fully expose his neck. You stopped just short of his skin, in awe of how much you'd been able to work him up and still so tempted to take it to the next level. "Fuck," you echoed. "This is so hot," you murmured almost to yourself. Your eyes closing along with his, you dealt the final blow. "I love that we have so much in common. But come on, you promised. One thing that's not on my list."
Jungkook whined. You could tell he needed to touch you so badly, and no one was stopping him but himself. He had no way of knowing that if he cut the whole discussion and just took you, you wouldn't even try to resist at this point. Staring at his trembling mouth from below, you quickly averted your eyes when he opened his, pretending you hadn't been looking. He inhaled a short hiss, and then spoke.
"Okay..." He paused after just the first word, blowing air through the tiny "o" of his mouth as his eyes bugged slightly from nervousness. He couldn't resist a challenge, though, and his urge to please you overwhelmed his reluctance to peel back one more layer. "So, the pain thing. I think we, uh, feel the same about me giving and you receiving. But...I'm really into it for myself too. I don't know if you'd be comfortable with it, I know you maybe want me to be more dominant and I think I like that more too in general, but you can be as rough with me as you want back. I'd love that." Eyes still open but fluttering, Jungkook's tone grew breathier, heady as he confessed. You almost giggled at how bashfully he worded his desire to dominate you, to rough each other up, but the contrast was so hot you couldn't help sucking your bottom lip between your teeth, eager for him to continue. His voice lowered. "I love being scratched, marked, bitten...hit me, push me back, any kind of pain or any way you can hurt me, I want it." He shivered, but his voice firmed up even further. "I want it so bad."
You fought to stay motionless beside him, unable to even process how much more his honesty had turned you on. You felt helpless in your desire for him, your craving to give him everything he wanted and more. He noticed your charged stillness and shifted toward you, removing a hand from his hair to finally reach for your face. Threading his fingers through your hair instinctively like he had with his own, he tilted your head back to access your neck. Jungkook finally felt confident enough to tease you back as he skimmed his lips over your pulse point, tugging your skin between his teeth for a gentle first taste and grinning when you moaned. Seeing someone so satisfied, for reasons better than just his body or their pride, brought the most incredible rush of blood to his head. And his other head.
"And I get why you want it too," he finished with a whisper in your ear. "So trust me when I say I really, really want to give it to you."
In an instant, your hands yanked his hair down to bring his face up to yours, mouths crashing together. Feverish, restless, you kissed him, hastily attempting to straddle his thick thighs before he threw his body over yours and pinned you to the back of the couch. His hands wandered, intrepid, from your waist to a quick squeeze of your breasts before he spiraled you into his strong arms. Pressing your chest flush with his as your mouths meshed, he ground his hips into you shamelessly, enjoying the way you struggled beneath him to align your core with his rock-hard dick.
"Your room?" You rushed out the words.
Jungkook laughed a little, his tone half whine and half dare. "So we're done talking?"
"Come on," you pleaded back. He finally relented, pulling you up with him and dragging you across the living room and through his door, lips not leaving yours for a second. You backed him into the bed with your arms against his strong chest, and once he was sitting perched on the edge, you laid yourself horizontally over his thighs.
"What are you doing?" he murmured, curling a hand over the dip of your waist to hold you gently.
You angled your head back to make unsteady eye contact with him, flipping your shorts down boldly. His free hand automatically reached to slowly conform to the shape of your ass, so eager to touch you but tentative as he grazed your curves.
"Giving you exactly what you want."
"Fuck. Really? You're sure about this?" Jungkook held careful eye contact as you brought your arms back up, crossing your wrists over your head delicately. You nodded slightly and did your best to meet his gaze with confident invitation, convincing him how much you trusted and wanted him.
He smoothed his warm hand over your ass one more time, then brought it up and watched your thighs tighten at the loss of his touch. Breathing in, still a little shakily, he brought his hand down on your right cheek with a loud but mild smack. A grunt of satisfaction involuntarily left him when he saw your face flinch down into the sheets, subduing a small noise of surprise. He returned his hand to caress the light redness he'd left, checking in with you again. "Is this okay? Let me know if I should stop."
You replied with your face still tucked between your arms, muffled by the bed. "More than okay. Please don't stop."
He spanked you again, moving to your left cheek. This time you felt his dick twitch under you and couldn't help grinding down on him a little bit. "Is that as hard as you can go?" you taunted in low tones, brave enough to egg him on but not quite enough to meet his eyes again.
Jungkook's thighs and core tensed under you, and he squeezed his fingertips tighter, digging into the skin of your ass. "Not at all," he said simply.
Deep breath. A few seconds passed, and his hand came down, harshly. You cried out in shock, the timing unexpected and the sting far sharper, and he gave your other cheek a fourth hard smack before you could even process the third one. "Harder?" he tested. "Tell me."
Another spank. "Mmmf."
"You like this, huh?"
"Yes, I told you," you whimpered back, half-teasing even though you were in no position to do so. Immediately, he cut you off with a stinging hit across both cheeks, and you moaned.
"You really do," he breathed lowly. "Fuck yeah. Take it then."
He spanked you again, and again, then paused, tugging down your shorts all the way to your ankles to expose the crease right above your thighs. Rubbing your already sore bottom, Jungkook cupped the underside of its curve in his big, firm hand. Already anticipating your whine, he drew back his touch and hummed in harmony with you. He continued landing satisfyingly hard smacks, alternating to cover your ass evenly. His dick strained through his pants more and more each time you trembled under his touch. Never hitting you hard enough to do serious damage, he still clearly enjoyed his thorough reddening of your ass, and occasionally took a moment just to caress your skin as it warmed from the spanking. The pain lit your senses up from head to toe. Face burning with deep arousal, you mentally thanked yourself for going out of your comfort zone and unprecedentedly admitting your kinks before even venturing into your first time together. Amidst the thrilling sting of his hand meeting your soft curves, Jungkook eventually noticed your thighs clenching together, craving friction but not really wanting relief from the pleasurable burn.
"You're wet," he marveled, sliding two warm fingers up and down your slit.
"Mhm," you mumbled back as you tilted your hips into his hand. He gave you a light slap right on the folds between your legs, eliciting another soft moan.
"So good for me," Jungkook said softly, pulling you up into his lap by your waist. "You look so pretty like this. I wanna see all of you." He tugged your sweatshirt over your head, followed by your sports bra, thankful that it stretched over your head easily. Suddenly grinning, he wound up and shot it across the room like a rubber band, and you smacked his arm, giggling.
"What was that? You cheeseball," you teased, and he blinked, chuckling lightly back. It occurred to him that he'd never laughed, or made someone laugh, during sex before.
"It was so stretchy! Don't make fun of me," he blushed.
"You're so cute," you said, fingers sliding under his t-shirt hem.
"Cute?" His eyebrows rose in mock disbelief, and he reached around to land another hit to your still-red asscheek.
"Hot," you amended. Raising his shirt and finally getting a full glimpse of his enviable abs, you groaned. "You're extremely hot, and also really cute, and it's kind of ridiculous and I don't really know how to handle all of it at once."
His face scrunching up into a smile at the praise, he fell back onto the bed with his arms behind his head. "You are too, you know. Really cute, of course. But really hot too." As you discarded his shirt and moved on to easing his sweatpants down his hips, you held in a gasp as his erection sprung up from the waistband. He was big, thick, and painfully hard, his tip glistening warm with precum and a lone vein running prominently up his smooth shaft. Although you wouldn't be corroborating them, you had to admit to yourself that all the rumors were true. You instinctively curled a hand around it, barely covering half his length, and he winced at your slightest touch. Pulling off with a single slow stroke, you slid his sweatpants and briefs all the way to the floor and then stood, looking up from his legs to his blown-out eyes to take in the glorious sight of his fully naked body.
"You shave," you said, surprised by the clean skin under his arms and between his legs.
"Yeah," he demurred, self-conscious for some reason. He lowered his arms to fold them over his torso, somehow defining his biceps even more. "I'm on the dance team, and it's nice to feel all smooth for practice and stuff. I don't know, I just like it."
"Oh, that's cool! No worries, I like it too. And you don't mind that..." You looked down at yourself, still just standing naked in front of him. "...I don't? Like, down there at least."
"No, you do you!" he said quickly. With a shy smile, he admitted, "I actually kind of like it on you. I do this for me, anyway, not for anyone else," he playfully noted. Slowly, he was sitting up to take hold of your waist and lower you down to the bed with him. Pausing to kiss the sweet spot under your jaw, he continued. "So don't feel like you have to do anything, or not do anything, either."
Jungkook couldn't quite explain the nature of how his attraction to you had developed. Seeing how open and honest you were with him made it easy for him to be honest with you too, and just to feel comfortable being himself. He admired the way he could still tell you sometimes got nervous like him, but it didn’t stop you from getting real or going bolder. Unable to fully express it in words, he just hoped to ensure you felt as comfortable and respected around him as he did around you. He already knew that he wanted this to be more than just a one-time thing, and while he still hesitated to assume that you felt the same, he intended to leave no doubt by the end of the night.
You moaned as he nipped at the skin of your neck. It was so easy to get swept back up in Jungkook. You could barely handle the friction of his dick rutting against your wet folds from below, craving him inside you. "Ughhh. Wait, one more thing. I'm on the pill, are you clean?"
"Yes," he gasped, barely removing his mouth from your jaw. "Are you?"
"Yeah, so we don't need a condom. If that's cool with you!"
"Yeah! But, you're ready?" He seemed surprised.
"Aren't you?" you whined, beyond holding back. He felt so unbearably hard that his coherence and willpower kind of surprised you too. "Please, I want you so bad."
To your surprise, he lowered his head to the crest of your legs, dotting wet kisses down your torso. Keeping his big brown eyes on you, he teased your entrance with a finger and echoed your immediate groan at the welcome stretch.
"You really are ready," he remarked, awed at the ease with which your wetness sucked the digit in. Frankly, you were in awe as well. It had taken your ex-boyfriend months to figure out how to get you this worked up. Jungkook either had even more experience than you'd heard from the grapevine, or he was a natural. Or maybe you were just really, ridiculously, primally attracted to him. He went on to curve his finger in you and lick a messy swipe up your folds, sucking hard once he reached your sensitive clit. You cried out at the delicious burst of stimulation and he rose up to catch your lips with his.
"I had to do that, just once," he grinned breathlessly. "But—"
"Let me suck you off," you interjected, unbelievably fucking turned on and dying to please him.
"No," he gasped with far more fervency than you'd think anyone could refuse a blowjob. "Please, I was about to say—" he choked out a high-pitched moan as you ran a single finger up his shaft in anticipation, sinking the nails of your other hand into his thigh. "—I think I'm gonna explode if I don't get inside you right this second."
So he did have a breaking point. "Fuck," you muttered, bringing your legs around his to tuck your heels under his tight ass as he lined up. He eased his tip in, keeping heavy eyes on you the whole time, and you could feel the hot, thick tension in his thighs as he struggled to hold himself back from just thrusting into your heat. Slowly, he drew closer into you until he bottomed out with a low moan. You whined at the perfect slight pain of the stretch, and Jungkook squeezed his eyes shut, gripping you by your waist. Watching the veins in his forearms stand out as he drove almost all the way out and back into you, you rocked your hips carefully against his with each smooth stroke, getting used to his fullness. When his balls met your ass again, he shuddered a bit and opened his eyes into yours.
You answered his question before he could even ask it. "Jungkook—you feel so good. You can go faster, it's okay."
A smile hit his eyes before his mouth, and he kissed you once, pressing his chest to yours and intertwining your tongues eagerly. You bit his bottom lip as he slowly drew away, tugging it between your teeth to pull a sweet little whimper from his throat. Grinning, he leaned back in to touch his forehead to yours and simultaneously slid a subtle hand under your ass to curve your hips up with his. The slight leftover sensitivity of your skin amplified his light touch, and Jungkook seemed to realize this, curling his fingers to tease you with the tips of his nails. Instinctively, you ducked to bite his neck, not even registering your move to pass the pain back to him until he choked out a beautifully half-restrained moan and snapped his hips into yours. Gasping, you encouraged him to lose himself in you, dragging your lips up to latch around his earlobe. He hissed and thrust into you sharply again, meeting the time of your movements as you swirled your tongue between each of his hoop earrings. Soon he was pounding you rhythmically, finally letting you feel the full force of his strength but keeping remarkable control over both his body and yours. Both of you had gone silent except for your heavy breaths, lost in the moment, but the flexed shivers of his thighs and twitches of his fingers in your hair told you all you needed to know. Suddenly yanking your strands to pull you back from the additional bruise you'd sucked beneath his ear, he earned a new set of scratches on his back as your hands dragged down the muscular expanse in reply. Jungkook switched places with you to draw dark clouds from your skin, a storm brewing under your jaw. Your face fell into pure bliss, eyes shut and immersed in the barrage of sensation from his hands, mouth, and big dick filling you. Already feeling the familiar tension that preceded an orgasm building through your whole body, you chased him closer to his climax too, grinding back roughly into every thrust and raking your hands over every part of his firm body you could reach.
You had really been fooling yourself when you thought you could try something casual for once. You wanted more of Jungkook, all of Jungkook, nothing but Jungkook ever again. Knowing he'd never even gone back to the same hookup twice sank slight anxiety into your stomach, a kind of future nostalgia for this moment you already feared losing. You knew you weren't anything special compared to the catalogue of gorgeous girls he'd had his turn with, but a deviant voice whispered from the back of your mind that you could be, because it was clear none had bothered to learn him like this. You'd still try your desperate best not to want too much from him, but you resolved to do whatever you could to make him crave more.
Rolling your hips in a smooth circle against him, you clenched around his dick and your hands tightened their fierce hold on his tiny waist. You felt his abs tense within your grasp as he tried not to stutter into you.
"Fuck. No." His voice cracked, but held an undertone of ferocity. "You come first." Jungkook rushed a hand to your clit, adding pressure in small, deft motions with a fingertip as he kept fucking you deep. You sank your teeth into his shoulder in response, drawing your hands up his back to clutch him closer to you, and Jungkook cried out. You left your mouth on his golden skin to stifle your moans as he sped up his fingers, and he tried to let you stay there but eventually couldn't help pulling you off him to see your face. Eyes narrowed and eyebrows turning up sharp at the ends, he watched you like a hawk to track the exact moment when he pushed you over the edge. Your face crumpled and you felt your whole body burn under his gaze as you came, squeezing around him in waves of pleasure while he fucked you through your high, unrelenting. Drinking up the bliss obvious on your features, Jungkook's eyes never left yours and his expression grew more and more fucked out. You marveled at how even as you lost control and energy to fuck him back, your body freezing in orgasm seemed to turn him on further. One last pulse of the tension leaving your core made his dick throb inside you, and you impulsively broke your eye contact to lean in and bite down slow but hard on his neck again. He gasped.
"You're amazing." Murmuring into his skin, you kissed the bite marks gently. Jungkook whimpered at the sweet contradiction and lurched into your hips even harder. You recovered to move with him, squeezing him deeper into you every time he bottomed out, and as his breathless moans escalated in pitch, his whole body shivered with each stroke. Pressing wet, heavy kisses all over his neck, you felt his jaw flutter while his lips hung open. His considerable strength spent, Jungkook shuddered one last hard thrust into you and finally let go, coating your walls from within. His hips lightly rocked against yours as he stayed deep inside you, still hard and savoring the euphoric release he'd held back for so long. You felt so incredibly warm and comfortable around his sensitive dick, relaxed but still holding him tight, and he couldn't help holding you up for a languid kiss before pulling out of you smoothly.
He briefly looked into your eyes, and you saw stars. The sun had continued to set outside, and it peeked between the blinds of his window to wrap you both in a warm, slivered glow. Staring down at his hands on your body, Jungkook took a deep breath and collapsed to your side, holding you close. You settled into him, cupping a hand over his head on your chest. With your fingers laced through his sweaty hair, you stroked his temple with your thumb, worrying for a second whether the gesture seemed too intimate but forgetting your fear when he snuggled up into your touch. You felt the need to say something, to figure out what the fuck was next after this, but stayed silent, not wanting to disturb the comforting weight of his frame. Heartbeat still racing, Jungkook stretched out to breathe a long sigh. As he sank back into you, you stretched under him too, letting his solid, warm body drape over you like a blanket. This couldn't be farther from what you'd expected with him, but you weren't about to make it stop. Surely, eventually, he would.
A minute passed. And then five. And then, before either of you could talk yourselves out of it, you were asleep, intertwined.
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