#another angst chapter

[currentlyreadingawesomefanfics]

Chapter 9 of Somnolent is going to be mighty interesting…

[rockingtheorange]

Do you ever think about how important and significant Alex's action to give his key to Henry was?

Alex had brought the key with him everywhere throughout his life since he got it.

Then, the first moment he's quietly alone with Henry, Alex gets to explain what it means to him: it's the key to his family's house in Austin.

But it means much more to him: it's from the times when his family was still all together (book), it's his childhood, his time growing up in Texas, it's his mixed blood, and the quiet life he left behind to follow his mother in something bigger than him.

That key is his comfort and reminder of what he was and the memories he will treasure forever.

Alex doesn't tell all of this to Henry, but Mr. HRH Prince Dickhead knows there's more about it underneath, just like how he had always known Alex wasn't just a peasant boy.

Alex brings his keychain everywhere and Henry is always there to admire it.

The key to Henry means something completely different: it's the reminder of his unusual life, the fact that he can't have such normal things as possessing a simple key, it represents all the things he can only admire from afar but he'll never be able to posses.

And then Alex breaks the wall that Henry thought would suffocate him forever, that seemed impossible to destroy.

Alex starts to remove the key when he's in the most intimate moments with Henry. He decides to leave the thoughts and worries related to his family for another time. He decides to be fully Henry's, even during just brief rendezvous.

And Henry takes everything he can, as far as he can. Till the moment, he's sure will come, when the magic breaks and the key will return to be something to admire and desire from afar, but never possess.

But Alex isn't just a peasant boy.

He hands over his childhood, his memories and his whole being to Henry, with just a simple gesture. Alex says "Henry, I'm yours." by giving him the object of his desires, by breaking the illusion that Henry can't be a normal boy, simply owning the key of someone's heart.

And Henry is reluctant to accept it, cause he knows (just like he had always known that Alex wasn't just a peasant boy) that the key means so much to him. But Henry accepts, cause he wants to believe that the wall between them can break, Alex made him believe it. And he grips and holds onto that hope like his life depends on it, cause it does.

Alex is the only key to his freedom.

[ghost-bxrd]

Static crackles over the phone, Dave choking on cigarette smoke no doubt, “S’cuse me, what?”

Jason doesn’t laugh. It’s not funny.

“I said to shoot the Bats.”

Another staticky sound, “Boss, I- even Robin?”

Jason takes a deep breath, “Yes.”

“But, uh, sir, Robin’s a kid, are you-“

“He’s sixteen,” Jason snaps, “I was fifteen when I die-“ He cuts himself off, breathing deeply.

On the other end of the line, Dave is silent.

“He’s not a kid,” the words burn in his throat, “You don’t get to be a kid in those colors, Dave. Just fucking do as I say.”

— Sneak peek of chpt xii of What You’re Longing For (you claim to abhor)

[queenie-ofthe-void]

A Desperate Fool - Part 6

Part 5

Last Time: Nancy starts filling in the gaps of everything Eddie's missed

~~~

Max, Lucas, and Erica were the first to quit calling. Hell, they’d always been more Steve’s than Eddie’s, since he’d adopted Max with the last of his parents’ trust money when he turned nineteen. After the kids graduated, Steve had set himself, Max, and Robin up in a cheap two bedroom apartment in Chicago where they all started school. Then Lucas moved in only a few months later– Max and Lucas in one room, Robin and Steve in the other. Only for Eddie to then uproot Steve to LA just before he could finish his degree, selfishly isolating him from his family.

Dustin was the next to disappear. They were close, and Eddie considered the kid one of his best friends. It apparently didn’t matter, which–just like with the other three–he should’ve seen coming. Steve was practically a brother to Dustin, same as Max. Eddie just always thought the split was more fifty-fifty with Dustin. It was a thick pill to swallow, but he managed.

He reached his final breaking point when Nancy and Mike started ignoring him. Eddie could make excuses for the rest of them, they were Steve’s adopted, puzzle-piece family. The Wheeler’s were Eddie’s family by blood. 

His parents kicked him out for kissing the neighbor boy– well, his adopted parents. Turns out Karen Wheeler had put him up for adoption three years before she met Ted, but was too scared to reach out, hoping he was happy with his new family. When little twelve year old Eddie showed up with a social worker at her door the next day, however, Karen welcomed him with open arms. He figures he’d be dead if it wasn’t for them, caught up running petty crimes just like his dad.

But that all meant Mike and Nancy were supposed to love him, not Steve. He called non-stop once he’d finally understood what was happening, but they never answered. Eddie remembers lying in bed for days, ruminating on how they’d picked golden boy Steve Harrington over their own family. Old feelings of neglect and rejection curdled up in Eddie’s stomach. A reminder that he was just a burden. Some lost, broken, queer kid they never asked for, forced onto them when Karen and Ted already had three mouths to feed.

Eddie's resentment towards everyone carried the band through their first national tour. He wanted to kick-off on a festival tour in Europe once they finished, but the band was exhausted. They were desperate to take a break while Metal Munson was still riding on top of the world, a full-fledged rockstar getting invites to behind-the-scenes parties, walking the red carpet, and casually dating celebrities. 

But he still loved his Corroded boys, so he agreed, thinking the break would allow them time to recover and give him more time to reap the benefits of a rockstar lifestyle. 

Except staying out every night started to lose its shine. The parties were duller than he remembered, the lights less bright. Mindless flirting with boys only interested in Metal Munson strained his smile. Strange, strong hands started to feel like sandpaper across his bare skin, the tangled sheets between them constricting Eddie until he couldn’t breathe. 

It all came crashing down when he woke up in an unfamiliar bed next to a man with fluffy brown hair, moles scattered across his back. Brilliant, sky blue eyes staring back at him.

Eddie quit going out. Stopped answering phone calls– not that the calls came from anyone who actually mattered. 

Because Steve never called. Not once, still hasn’t. And Eddie doesn't think he ever will.

~~~

Part 7

Tag List!!!

@sadisticaltarts @5ammi90 @blacklegsanji21 @jaytriesstrangerthings

@thewickedkat you didn't actually asked to be added to the tags, but I included you bc of your comment on the last part. If you'd like to not be included next time just lmk <3

[plantwithoutplot]

ASL Brothers sketch art

Chapter 7 of Speak Up, Boys!

[formulapookie]

💛💛

Under the cut to read on tumblr, here to read on Ao3 chapter 1; chapter 2; chapter 3

Les fleurs du mal ch4 rosquez, 1.8k words

Vale has been thinking of everything but Marc lately, or at least, he’s been trying to.

He wakes up every day with a different person in bed, this break is getting him the refill of energy he needs, or well, the refill of alcohol and whatever substance he keeps putting in it he needs.

He had thought about calling up Marc.

Just to fuck, or to have him suck him off, like it happened in Sepang.

But the chill that runs up his back at the thought of Marc being hurt, those damn petals in the bin, Marc yelling at him not to touch him makes it impossible.

He turns around, he doesn’t even remember who he got in bed with last night, too high or drunk or both to care.

There’s a cute guy beside him, he looks young, he probably is not older than 25, brown curly hair, slightly tanned skin.

Ok so this one Vale has to admit is basically another version of Marc.

Even the lips they’re - not the same but similar to Marc’s.

There’s no mole on his pec though, the one Vale kissed so many times before, there’s no twitch of his eyebrow when Vale moves the sheets, no heavenly sweet voice calling him back to bed as he gets up to get dressed.

If this was Marc’s home, he’d stay.

Get up, prepare breakfast, wake Marc up and lead him to the kitchen.

Eat together, mostly in silence because Marc doesn’t really like to talk in the morning and then either have another round, nice and lazy, or just lay on the couch watching something horribly romantic Marc would put on the TV.

Now, he just gets dressed as quickly as he can, ignoring the boy still sleeping in the bed, and getting out of there.

Luckily this guy doesn’t live too far from the hotel he’s staying in, so he can walk there pretty easily.

Marc on the other hand, he’s been spending his winter break at home, cold and shivering, refusing visitors except for his mother and exceptionally his brother and father, without ever mentioning his disease, playing it down to a harsh fever he didn’t want to pass to others.

Jorge had texted him, phoned him, trying to put some sense in his mind, trying to convince him to get the operation done, telling him Vale would not go back on his steps, that Vale had probably never even loved him to begin with.

He had just worsened the situation, trying to make Marc understand it was useless to keep hoping.

But once again, Marc is a stubborn man, he’s set his head on the thought Vale will reciprocate again, that Vale will call him.

Or text him.

Or meet him once they’re both back on track for the new season.

But more than a month has passed since Valencia, since the incident he had to mask to the media, since Vale obviously came to know about the situation he is in.

And he hasn’t called or texted.

But maybe he just needs time.

They have time.

Marc is sure they have time.

Even if these days the shivers and fever are higher, even if his own mother is begging him to get the operation done, he knows they have time.

Because they’re soulmates, they’re made to love each other.

Marc knows the story about the red string of fate and he’s ready to swear him and Vale are connected by it.

To each pinky they’ve got a red string bonding them together for the stars to see.

“You’re really pretty in the morning you know?”

“Only in the morning?”

Marc had pouted playfully at Vale’s words, still curled up against his chest, smiling against it.

“During the night you’re more hot than pretty amore”

“ I like you calling me hot”

“Yeah? You’re really hot”

“Are you trying to charm me in your pants Vale? Not very gentlemanly of you to do”

“You don’t like gentlemen Marc”

“Mh no, I like you”

They had kissed, Vale’s hands guiding Marc on his lap by his hips, as if he weighed nothing.

“I love you”

“Love you too Vale”

It was then Vale told him about the strings of fate.

“You know baby? There’s a legend, it says when two people are made for each other they’ve got an invisible red string which is tied to both their pinkies and bonds them together”

“You think we-“

“I said you would be the next me no? Would I say that to someone I don’t think has to be mine?”

It hurts to remember.

Because Vale had so much love in his words and so much truth it seems impossible to Marc that he’s puking petals again, hung over his toilet, because Vale had wounded him so deeply he could feel the blood run free of containment in his body.

There’s a knock at the bathroom door.

A soft one, almost ghostly.

“Marc? It’s mom, are you coming to lunch?”

“Yeah I” he holds in his cough, he knows it hurts his mother to hear him

“I’m coming mom”

“Are you - again?”

“No no mom don’t worry”

When he gets out his mother hugs him, so tight he thinks his lungs are breaking more under pressure.

He’s fragile now, really fragile, his rib cage is very visible through the skin, his cheeks are hollower than they used to be, the color of his skin no more a sweet caramel tone but instead a pale and washed one.

He’s thinner, every cough feels like a hit to his sternum, if he bumps into things a bruise is really quick to follow.

He’s sick, sick as he’s never been before.

He even had to miss a training session because he was too debilitated to do it.

Santi had pretended to know what was going on, he had said bronchitis.

Which wasn’t completely far from the truth.

He can feel his mother’s pain through the hug, in the way she tries to keep the crying at bay, the way her heart is synchronizing itself to his.

“Marc, you need to listen to your friend.

He -” his mother never said the name Vale, or Valentino, not even Rossi.

it was always “he”

“He’s not coming back Marc”

“Ma-“

“Marc, please”

“Just - just give him some time mom. He’ll come back. I know he will. Now can we go have lunch? I’m hungry”

“You need to tell Alex”

“No. I won’t tell, there’s no need to. He doesn’t need to know, I’m gonna be fine in no time anyway. Plus if I told him he’d do something stupid like forging my signature and force me to get the operation”

“Marc”

“Mom. I’ll be fine. I promise you. We’re both gonna be fine, he just needs a bit more time to realize it”

Roser tries to have this conversation three more times during Marc’s stay at home.

She tries to tell Alex, but when her younger son answers she can’t tell him anything, beside “Marc is still sick, but he’s getting a bit better”.

Marc had begged her not to talk, and Roser can’t bring herself to betray her son’s trust, not after his heart has already been shattered by the person he loves more than anything in this world. 

In the delirium caused by the fever that keeps getting higher and higher, Marc had called for that man.

She had run to him, cold towels placed on his forehead and wrists to try and bring the temperature down, with little results.

“Vale it hurts please bring me water”

“Marc, it's mom, what's going on?”

“Vale just - he went to take a glass of water, don’t worry go back to sleep”

“Marc he is not -”

“Look he’s back, see? Go to sleep mom”

“Thanks Vale, you see mom? I told you he just needed time, we’re fine”

It had been a painful night, Marc snapping out his open eyed dream and sobbing in her arms like a little kid who just scraped his knee and wanted to be held by his mother.

And she had held him like that, trying to protect him from all the evil in his mind, from all the evil that man had sewed into his skin, but to no avail.

If she placed a hand on her son’s ribcage she could trace the outline of a root.

When he took deeper breaths in her embrace she could feel the bumpy surface of his bones against her chest.

She had thought, once, to call the man’s mother.

She thought that maybe she would’ve understood the worry of a mother, that she would’ve tried to talk to her son.

But she knew if she did she would’ve just spewed hate towards that woman’s son, and couldn’t do that to another mother.

So she just held him as if he was a little boy, tried to picture him as his three years old self when he had fallen from the mini bike and hurt his elbow, and she had held him until he slept.

Vale meanwhile had begun to doubt.

Doubt everything.

Uccio first of all people.

It made no sense, no sense what he had accused Marc of doing.

And even if - even if he had been shown proof of it, Vale doubts.

After months, long infinite months later he’s doubting.

Of the telemetry, of the color of the petals.

Hell he even doubts Marc ever came to the Ranch on purpose to beat the record and shame him.

Because it simply doesn’t hold ground as an accusation, why would Marc, a lovestruck 20 something kid, who just loves Vale so much to still have a collection of bikes representing him, a rival,

in his room, why would he do something like that to him?

He wouldn’t.

He loved, still loves Vale, he’s sure of this. He just has to find counter proof.

For the first time ever he’ll have to work against the one friend he always trusted with all his everything.

So he begins his personal crusade to find out the truth he thinks lies covered beneath the surface of thick and carefully built lies Uccio fed him.

For what reason he doesn’t know, he can’t find it in his mind to understand what could have driven Uccio to do what he did.

He spends a month locked in his house, not even paying attention to his academy of growing riders, the only one partially admitted at home being his little brother, but not more than once every week.

He spends a month looking for evidence he’s been lied to, driven away, manipulated, blinded by his competitive spirit.

He doesn’t call or text Marc.

He fears if he’s not completely sure of his idea it will end up hurting Marc more.

The start of the season is two weeks away when Lorenzo sends him a text.

[leapdayowo]

Redstone and Skulk ch. 43

Had to draw this moment cuz it’s been eating away at my brain since I read it😭 Next on my list is EB giving them a hug

[phoebepheebsphibs]

Double-Mutated Mikey

Chapter 35: Monster

Continued from the short story written by @boots-with-the-fur-club

Prev || Next

Leo readies his twin katanas. Raph raises his sai. Donatello points the end of his bō staff in Chaplin's direction.

"You," Donnie growls. "What. Have you done. With our brother."

Chaplin smiles.

"What haven't I done is a better question," he jokes. "I've improved him. Though, let's be honest... with your kind, improvement isn't enough."

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?!" Leo spits at him.

"It means that the Yokai and the mutants are... how shall I put this..."

"What, a disease? A cancer? A deformity? I've seen the movies with the evil villains who want to eradicate a species, I know this bullcrap speech!" Leo snarks at him.

"No no, you misunderstand. Your people are quite talented and impressive!" Chaplin says with a grin. "I've studied your cultures, your biology, your abilities. I've travelled the world and seen many Yokai cities. But you are a threat. And I won't allow any threats to humanity. Alien or otherwise."

"So, then why the mutations?" Raph asks. "Why do so many cruel experiments?? If you hate mutants so much, why make more?"

"Quite simple, really," Chaplin explains, lifting his legs and recrossing them the other way around. "We've been trying to fight fire with fire. To destroy the mutants and the Yokai, we had to make some of our own. Though, our experiments continuously failed us. We were missing some crucial element, the secret ingredient that allows you to function and survive and have incredible supernatural abilities -- until we found your Mikey."

Leo hears Raph growl from behind him.

"He is quite resilient, your brother. So much stronger than we expected! And that was even before we mutated him! His potential is practically unlimited."

"Why would you subject him to this?!" Donnie hisses. "What was the purpose of this room?! Why make him fight?!"

"Three reasons," Chaplin explains calmly. "One: we needed to see his abilities in action, and the extent of those abilities. Two: it was a way to train his problem-solving skills. We knew he was strong and powerful, but we also needed to confirm he had intelligence. None of our other experiments were advanced in the mind. Far from it, they seemed to deteriorate rapidly."

"...What was the third reason?" Donnie asks with hesitance.

"Oh, yes. Waste management."

Leo glares at the scientist.

"What."

"Well, we'd been doing quite a number of experiments, and they were piling up. We were running out of space, supplies, food, etc. And they were all disappointments. True, they had interesting new abilities and enhanced strength, but they were disgusting failures in the end, and we had to free up some space to try again with new vermin. So we had to eradicate the excess mutants, and Mikey was a big help with that."

Raph stomps forward.

"You're... you're a sick, twisted, sadistic MONSTER!"

"I'm a man who is working towards a goal," Dr. Chaplin corrects.

"What does Mikey have to do with it? How does he accomplish your goal?!" Leo shouts. "How does kidnapping my baby brother help you?!"

"Mikey is a weapon," he explains, leaning back nonchalantly. "MY weapon. He is indestructible, powerful, his instincts are impeccable, and he can take orders. He's the perfect living weapon, and he will help me eradicate every threat to humanity."

"You can't turn our brother into a weapon!" Leo shouts.

"Yeah, that was my idea!" Donnie chimes in, though Raph smacks him upside the head in frustration. "Ow! Right, right, not the time..."

Leo saunters up to the mad scientist and presses a katana against his neck.

"Now. WHERE. IS. MIKEY?! What have you done with him?!"

"Oh, of course!" Dr. Chaplin laughs. "Don't worry, he's right here..."

Dr. Chaplin taps a button on the side of the chair, and a panel in the wall opens.

From the darkness, two glowing yellow and red eyes can be seen peering at them. Slowly, Mikey steps out, staring blankly at his brothers.

"Mikey!" Leo gasps, releasing Dr. Chaplin and rushing over to his baby brother. "You're okay! Come on, we're getting out of here and--"

Leo takes Mikey's hand and pulls, but Mikey refuses to move.

".......Mikey...?"

"I'm afraid he can't hear you," Chaplin huffs.

Leo turns to glare at Dr. Chaplin. He suddenly notices the headband crowning him, the bright pink lights that adorn the sides. How had he not seen it before?!

Leo steps away from Mikey, staring in fear as he realizes what's about to happen.

"Mikey... no..."

"Wonderful little gadget, this!" Dr. Chaplin brags. "Can work up to a three mile radius in all directions. It's based on Krang technologies and biologies."

"B-biology...?" Raph whimpers, hand going to his eye once again.

"Oh yes. We learned a lot from the infected zombies. This machine combines a severed part of the brain from that one alien we captured. I'm assuming I have you four to thank for that..."

"Her... brain?" Leo gawks. "You took her brain?"

"Oh, don't act like that is some terrible and horrific thing after all they tried to do!" Dr. Chaplin groans. "You honestly can't say that you're not relieved that 'she' is dead now. And besides, the real person you have to thank for this machine is actually your own brother!"

Leo, Donnie, and Raph simultaneously turn to look at Mikey.

"You see, he showed us something we never expected -- Mikey could control the zombies. That was when we realized, there was a hierarchy to the Krang -- the zombies were the omegas, and Mikey was the beta, hence why they followed his commands. The Krang were the alphas, and as such could control all of them easily. That was what we needed with Mikey. During of our evaluations, some of our staff psychiatrists discovered that Mikey had an alternate persona that activated during moments of intense emotion or physical distress. It was strong, forceful, and wasn't afraid to go for the kill. But he was also stubborn and dangerous, and refused to comply willingly. We needed a way to have Mikey be the monster while also listening to instructions. And so I created a way to mimic the Krang brain waves so as to control him."

"You... you beat him," Donnie heaves. "I saw the video, you tortured him..."

"That was for a reason," Dr. Chaplin insists. "I needed to see if he would follow orders to a tee, even if it meant physical harm."

Donnie heaves again.

"And he did superbly; his compliance was wonderful. A perfect living weapon that will follow orders unto death! Speaking of which --"

"D-don't do it, don't listen to him --" Leo tries, reaching for his baby brother.

"Mikey," Dr. Chaplin orders, "If you would be so kind as to dispatch these intruders for me."

Mikey glares at his brothers. His mouth curls into a snarl, his irises slit into thin lines. He places himself in a ready stance, claws elongated and ready to fight. His tail whips around him, the tip spiking like a mace.

"Mikey, please, I-I don't wanna fight you!" Leo begs. He doesn't want to go through this again... not again...

Mikey rushes forwards.

Raph pulls Leo away and shields him, holding his arms up and activating his ninpo. Large holographic arms cover over him, protecting him from Mikey's onslaught. Mikey lunges and starts biting the hologram, tearing it apart piece by piece with his sharp claws and talons. He sinks his fangs into them; they go so deep they nearly puncture Raph's actual arm.

Donnie's robot arms protrude from his battle-shell, grab Mikey from behind, and yank him off of Raph. Mikey shrieks angrily and turns back to attack Donnie.

"Mikey, snap out of it!" Donnie yells.

Mikey screeches and slashes his claws at him. Donnie reels back, dropping his brother as he guards himself. Mikey slashes his tail and several projectile spines fly at him. Donnie twirls his staff and hastily creates a shield, deflecting them at the last second. Raph wraps his ninpo arms around Mikey, who struggles against him. He howls and yowls. The cries sound desperate, scared --

"M-Mikey?" Raph gasps. "Wait, did I hurt you--"

"Raph, no, don't--!"

Raphael drops Mikey, afraid that he may have held him too tight. Mikey instantly turns on him and attacks, his tail slashing at the ankles and knocking him down. Raph yells in pain as he falls, clutching the wound and trying to stop the bleeding.

"Mikey!" Leo scolds. "Snap out of it!!"

The double-mutant turns and glares at Leo. He's next.

"Dee, keep him distracted, I'm going to take out the controller!" Leo hisses.

Donnie nods, and creates a series of mini missiles to fire at (and purposefully miss) Mikey, as Leo creates a portal and slips through.

The portal reopens and appears right behind Dr. Chaplin. Leo reaches for the headset before being swatted away by the mad scientist. He says nothing, but the string of pink glowing lights around his head indicate he's given another order. Mikey is by his side in an instant, pouncing on Leo and crashing him to the floor. Mikey bares his teeth and tries to bite him, but Leo narrowly blocks with his katana hilt. Mikey chomps down on it, growling as he tries to pull it away.

A mini missile strikes him in the back, and he turns to roar at Donnie.

"Mikey, you have to ignore whatever he's telling you to do! Wake up! It's US!!" Donnie shouts.

Mikey has had enough of their antics. His eyes burn bright, a series of scales on his neck lift up, revealing what almost looks like gills. They vibrate, charging up with a pink and orange glow. Mikey roars loudly, deafening the entire room. Visible sound waves pulse like giant ripples, throwing everyone off balance.

Donatello is knocked back, slamming into Raphael with a thud and a groan as the mystic shockwaves dissolve his hologram weapons, and disintegrate Raph's armour.

Leo watches as the portal he made evaporates, the markings on his arms and legs flicker out before dimming.

N-no... no, not again --!

Mikey jumps to Donnie and starts to attack. Raph shields him again, but Mikey snaps his teeth and bites down hard on his forearm. Raphael screams, shaking and waving his arm as he tries to get his baby brother to release. Donnie grabs Mikey and pulls. Mikey turns to snarl at him before wrapping his tail around his neck, placing him in a chokehold. Mikey grabs his two hands and clasps them together between his talon grip, essentially cuffing him. Donnie gags and gasps, sputtering as he slowly turns blue.

"Mikey!" Raph screams. "L-let him go--"

Mikey whirls around, maneuvering in such a way that he throws Donnie's body at Raph's head. The two crash to the floor. Mikey regains his stranglehold on Donnie as Raph tries to get back up. Mikey doesn't give him the chance, and punches him between the eyes, knocking him unconscious. Donnie slowly goes limp as well, his eyes rolling back in his head as he chokes-out. Mikey releases him once he's certain he also has succumbed.

He turns to face his last adversary.

"Mikey," Leo whimpers. "I-I know you don't want to hurt me. And I don't want to hurt you..."

"Oh, don't worry about that," Dr. Chaplin laughs. "He won't give you the chance."

Mikey rushes him, gaining speed before leaping and kicking Leo in the chest, crashing him into the wall behind him. The tiles and panels leading to hidden rooms crack from the impact, leaving a gaping crater. Leo coughs and holds his side, looking up just in time to see Mikey do a spin kick before the side of his foot collides with his head.

.

.

.

Mikey slips into the vents easily. The EPF should really work on their security, any nutcase could break in!

He crawls around, going deeper and deeper into the ventilation systems, floor after floor after floor. Every once in a while he can hear some animals crying and growling and barking loudly. He shudders at the thought of what they could be doing to these poor guys...

He pushes on.

Mikey hears a snarling sound, eerily familiar. It's animalistic, but not like any animal on Earth. It's alien.

He peeks through the vents to see the EPF men taking the krangified dude he saw from earlier into a lift. It's perfect luck that the angle of the vents lets him see the elevator room, a mirror glass on the back wall reflecting everything. He can see their reflections, he can see the button they pressed -- The very bottom floor.

Mikey goes in pursuit of them. He has to know what they're going to do with that poor man...

Mikey's almost there when his phone buzzes again. Probably Leo or Donnie, they've been calling him a lot. He picks it up and checks the lockscreen. Oh, it's Raph! Mikey guesses he wants to know where he is... He should have left a note or something. He answers.

"Shello?" He whispers.

"Mikey? Where are ya?!" Raph hisses at him. "I thought we said no inside stuff!"

"I saw a weird van pull up," he explains. "They took a krangified person in through the back."

"They what?" Raph sounds terrified. Mikey can't blame him, not after everything that has happened.

"Yeah, I know. I wanted to see what they were gonna do with him."

Because that's what heroes do! Mikey thinks to himself. That's what Raph always says, and that's what he expects him to say. Instead he's met with a panicked and desperate command.

"Mikey, I think you should get outta there."

That's not like Raph, why is he so scared? Sure, the place is creepy, but no creepier than when they broke into Draxum's lab that first time...

"I will in just a sec," Mikey responds, having finally made it to the bottom floor vents. "I think I found the room where..."

Mikey's voice trails off as he sees the entirety of the basement. It's a little dim, but there are a few lights here and there. Mikey flips the vent flaps open just a bit more for a better view. It looks like some kind of secret lab. Why is this lab separate from the rest upstairs? What's different about this one, apart from the colour scheme?

The krangified victim is strapped to a chair, several scientists standing beside him and a few guards with special futuristic-looking weapons pointed at him.

"Huh..."

"Mikey? Mikey, what is it?" Raph's voice hisses nervously through the phone's tinny speakers.

"I'm not sure... hold on a sec, 'kay?" Mikey whispers as he watches. He puts Raph on mute, just to be safe.

The scientists are talking about something as they operate on the guy, pulling pieces of krang flesh off bit by bit. Mikey can't hear much, just the occasional "Hold him still," "Be careful," "Not too much," etc. They're... curing him?

Mikey watches as a doctor takes a vial of the bright blue liquid April found. Guess these guys found it, too. Donnie made sure to release the formula publicly so the police could help save the infected people. The scientist fills a syringe with mixture, then inject it into a part of the krang on the guy's face. The krang screeches in agony, the flesh flailing and wriggling.

"Now!" he hears one of the doctors yell.

The scientists pull the flesh away, ripping it off of his face.

The guy yells, his eyes roll in the back of his head, and he flops over in his chair. One of the guards checks his pulse.

"He's alive."

Mikey sighs with relief.

"Good, now get him out of here before he wakes up," one of the doctors orders.

The man is slowly unbuckled from the chair and carried away by two of the guards, the other two remaining.

"Now, let's get this thing into storage for the next batch of test subjects," the head scientist says, taking the still-alive-but-barely krang parasite away and placing it in a jar.

Mikey crawls a bit more through the vents, trying to follow the scientists to wherever they store the parasite. How many more do they have??

Mikey gasps when he sees the centerpiece of the labs -- a giant cylinder tube housing the Krang Sister, her eye still melted from where April attacked her. She looks thin, wrinkly and emaciated. Her left eye is still intact and open, but unfocused. He can almost see her breathing if he watches hard enough. But there are parts of her missing, torn off, cut off, melted off, take your pick.

There's a cryogenic freezer cabinet or something housing her organs and severed limbs, along with so many other krang parasites. Bits of pink and pale purple flesh, teeth and fangs, claws and talons and nails... He sees a jar of just eyeballs, krang eyeballs... he recognizes a few from the traincar that attacked him and Donnie!

"Ohmigosh," he whimpers, unmuting Raphael. "Okay, that's enough for me, I'm coming out now!"

"Mikey?! What did you see, what's going on?" Raph asks, his voice high and shaking.

Mikey doesn't respond at first, he's trying to crawl away as fast as possible. He lifts up his phone to try and tell Raph what he saw, but his fingers slip and it falls. Mikey's heart stops as the device clangs and clatters against the metal with a hideous echo. He can hear the scientists start yelling.

"What was that?!"

"Something's in the vents!"

"Call security, we have a breach!"

Mikey quickly scrambles to get his phone, he starts crawling with lightning speed, not trying to be quiet anymore as his kneepads smack loudly against the panels. He knows Raph heard what just happened.

"I dropped my phone," Mikey whimpers into the device. "I think they heard me."

"GET OUT NOW!" Raph yells at him.

"I am! I AM!" Mikey whines, terrified.

He should never have come in here, what was he thinking?! If they find him --

There's a clicking sound from his phone as another voice joins the call.

"Raph? What's going --"

"Mikey's been made," Raph says in a hurry.

"Get out of there, now!" the voice shouts.

"Leo?" Mikey whispers nervously. "Is that you?"

"Mikey, we're on our way now," Leo informs him. His voice is stern, but smooth, feigning frenzied calmness as he tells Mikey what to do. "Just get out as fast as you can! Don't worry about whether or not you're seen, just get out!"

"I'm trying!" Mikey yells back, desperate not to let the sound of his tears come through the speaker. He turns a corner in the ducts, coming to a small fork in the road. Wait, which way did he come from? Which way gets him out of here?!

"I'm stuck in the vents!!" he realizes out loud, hoping somehow his brothers will help him -- maybe Donnie can look up the building plans and use that subdermal tracker to guide him, or Leo can make a portal, or --

Something pushes against Mikey's chest, slamming him into the top of the vent. One of the guards shoved the barrel of their weird gun thing into him and is trying to knock him down! The panels underneath him start to shake, the duct comes loose from Mikey's weight and the jabbing of the guards.

Mikey screams as the section he's trapped in falls to the floor. His phone hits the ground and bounces just out of his reach.

He looks up in terror and sees that he is surrounded by six or so people.

"There he is!"

"Get him!"

"Come'ere, kid!"

Mikey shrieks, trying to scramble away. His legs are grabbed by a scientist on the end as the guards rush and nearly tackle him, trying to secure his arms.

"Let me go! Stop! Leave me alone!" he begs, trying to wrench himself free.

Mikey kicks, shoving the scientist back and forcing himself up, lifting the security guards who have practically dogpiled him.

Mikey struggles under their weight, and reaches for his nunchucks. He's kneed in the gut by one of the guards, knocking the wind out of him and he falls, face mashing into the floor.

He can hear the cell phone, he can hear Raph and Leo shouting for him, yelling instructions or pleas for him to get to safety.

"Raph! Leo!" He screams, reaching frantically for his phone.

He just catches them shouting back to him before one of the scientists can smash his heel into the device, breaking it into pieces.

"NO!" Mikey yells, struggling against the men who hold him down.

"Keep it still," one of the lab coats say, grabbing a syringe with clear liquid in it.

Mikey growls as he pries an arm out from under their weight, shoving and pushing as best he can. His hand is grabbed by one of the scientists, the one who broke his phone.

"Let me go!" he yells. "Let me go! I wanna go home!"

"You should have thought of that before you trespassed on government property," says the scientist.

"What?! Who are you people?! What is this place?!" Mikey demands.

"A better question is, what are you?"

The doctor with the needle kneels down beside Mikey's head.

"Hold him still," he orders the others.

A hand is pressed against Mikey's head, shoving him down into the linoleum floor as hard as he can. Mikey shouts and screams in protest as the needle is stabbed into his neck.

It stings, the sharp pain masking over the feeling of the instant anesthetic being injected into his veins. He leans his head as far away as he can, trying to keep away... k-keep away fr-from... the... ttthhhhhe.......

Mikey is flooded with the oddest sensation of panicked anxiety meddled with forced calm as the anesthetic takes effect. It ends up giving him the biggest feeling of butterflies in his stomach, fluttering up into his head and through his limbs, making them light as a feather yet heavier than lead. His thoughts swirl messily, trying to stay tethered to reality...

A countdown starts in him. Mikey's limbs slow, relax, fall limp against the cold linoleum tiles. The tears in his eyes slip loose and drip down his cheeks. His breathing is deep and sluggish, he clicks his tongue and whimpers as he tries to make some kind of last attempt or argument to save himself. Mikey's eyes flutter closed... he vaguely registers the men climbing off of him and lifting him up, a doctor giving orders to carry him somewhere... Mikey mumbles a sleepy protest before his tongue and vocal chords seem to disappear... Everything disappears... Everything goes dark...

Where did Mikey go...?

Where are his brothers...?

Where is the world now... where... where are his dreams...?

It's all inky black void. It's all deep and mindless sleep.

Mikey has vanished.

Mikey's head rolls groggily as he comes back to reality.

Feeling seeps back into him, though his head is numb and still exhausted from the drug.

He can't move. His limbs are tired. And there's something cold and heavy against his wrists and ankles. Leathery straps tie him down by the waist and thighs and across the shoulders.

He slowly starts to register sight and sound, as a painfully blinding light is shined in his face.

"Ah, it's awake," a voice says. Mikey recognizes it as one of the doctors from the secret basement...

Mikey grumbles softly, squinting his eyes shut tightly and turning away from the light.

"Mmnngh... too bright," he mumbles in discomfort.

"Since you can speak, that means you can answer a few questions for me," the voice says.

Mikey can't see anything apart from the blinding light being shined in his face. He peeks one eye open and immediately regrets it; the light burns his retina and leaves spots in his vision.

"First off, what are you?" the scientist demands.

Mikey groans again.

"C-could you maybe turn the light off? I can't think straight with the full force of the sun in my eyes," Mikey half-jokes. Somebody has to fill in for Leo.

There is a huff of a dry laugh, followed by the dimming of the light. Mikey opens his eyes slowly, adjusting to the new level of brightness. There are a group of scientists in the room, each one staring and glaring at Mikey.

"Uh, hi, guys," he chuckles nervously. "What's the happs?"

"The 'happs' is that you broke into a government sanctioned facility for genetic studies," says an elderly doctor with frazzled white hair. "That's... well, that's illegal."

"And kidnapping isn't?" Mikey challenges. "I saw that guy you took. I saw what you did to him."

"We saved him," one of the doctors growls. "We were able to take the alien infection away from him --"

"You stabbed him with a needle and harvested the krang parasite!" Mikey argues. "And then you just took his body away!"

"He's alive," the elderly doctor says. "He's alive and well and back in his right mind!"

"Professor Honeycutt, if you wouldn't mind?" one of the other doctors grumbles. "We're in the middle of an interrogation..."

"O-oh, yes, right..." the elderly professor says meekly, cowering away.

"Now, how do you know about the -- what did you call it? Kang?"

"The Krang?" Mikey answers, confused. "That's... that's what they are. Didn't you know that? You've got the Krang Sister downstairs in your creepy cellar dungeon thing!"

"So, you DID see it," the younger doctor says. "Well then. That means you can't leave."

"What?!" Mikey gasps. "W-wait a sec --"

"Dr. Chaplin will be arriving soon, and what will we tell him when he discovers that there was a breach in security?! There have been setbacks after setbacks, and we have yet to provide a successful mutation --"

The doctor turns to contemplate Mikey. Mikey swallows nervously.

Uh oh.

"...I say we try it out on this one," the young doctor snickers before turning to the rest. "Prep him."

"Prep?" Mikey echoes. "P-prep for what...?"

"Do you realize what you're saying?!" the man called Honeycutt asks, pulling the younger man's arm away. "No, that's -- that's a horrid suggestion, Timothy! We can't just operate on -- he's a kid!"

"He's a freak of nature, look at him!" 'Timothy' shouts at the frail old man. "He's probably one of those mutant monsters that's been running feral on the streets these past two years. I don't see why we shouldn't."

"He's a sentient being! He has a higher intelligence than one of the rats or rabbits -- it would be inhumane!"

"Does he look human to you?" Timothy asks.

Mikey's heart is pounding in his chest.

"W-wait, please, I-I -- please, don't do this," Mikey begs. "I'm not a monster!"

"Maybe not now," Timothy says with a wicked smile. "But you will be."

The doctors place masks on their faces and gloves on their hands as they get ready. Mikey's head is strapped down and the light turned back on to its fullest extent, blinding him again.

"Wait!" Mikey screams. "Wait! I-I've got lots of other interesting things to talk about! I can tell you where the Krang came from, how we defeated them -- Please! You can't do this! Don't do this!!"

"I wash my hands of this," the older doctor says. "I won't have any part of this ridiculous madness.... I'm staying out of it."

"If you don't like it, then you can go back to working on your little robot pet 'Sal' of yours, or that android 'Ms. Campbell'," Dr. Timothy replies drably.

Mikey sobs in terror as the chair he's strapped to is lowered even further so the doctors can operate on him. Odd circular metallic suctions are pressed against his temples and cranium.

"Please! No! No!"

"You know, most of the mutations don't take very well, but considering you're already a mutie, that may mean you could survive this," Dr. Timothy teases. "I'm excited to see how your biology will react..."

"NO!!!" Mikey shrieks.

Mikey's ninpo starts to activate, the marks on his arms glowing as he struggles to pull himself free. One hand shatters a cuff.

"Hold him down!!" Dr. Timothy yells.

As Mikey is shouting and shrieking, one of the scientists lunges at him and holds his arm down.

A second doctor takes advantage of the fact that Mikey's mouth is open and starts shoving a tube down his throat. Mikey almost chokes on it as he struggles.

Mystic chains start to fill the room, a golden glow builds.

"Start it!! NOW!" Timothy shouts.

The doctor who shoved the tube down Mikey's throat pulls a lever connected to a big metal container. Pink and green glowing ooze starts flowing through, filtering into Mikey's mouth.

Mikey watches in terror, screaming muffled cries as he waits for the vile slime to pour through his throat and infiltrate his body.

It's cold and slick and slimy. As soon as it enters into him, Mikey's body starts convulsing. He howls, shrill and high and blood-curdling and despairing and pained. His body jerks every which way as it tries to reject the profane concoction.

The glow on his arms flickers out.

The golden chains in the room shatter and crumble away to dust.

Mikey is sobbing, tears streaming down his face as he tries to get free, tries to spit the tube out, tries to vomit up the ooze he's being force-fed. He doesn't notice the doctors preparing injection-devices by his neck, filling several vials and test tubes with different colored liquids and DNA samples. A soft mechanical whirring sounds, and cold metal clamps are pressed against his throat.

"Now!" Dr. Timothy shouts above the noise.

Mikey's world turns into a hurricane of static and unbearable pain as electrical charges course through him via the suctions pressed on his forehead. Needles pierce his skin and fill his veins with sludge and poison.

Mikey screams like he's never screamed before.

His body becomes a living x-ray, glowing bright blue from how much voltage he's taking. His skeleton is showing through the lights against a black silhouette. His body snaps and breaks and reforms. He can feel himself dying and coming back to life over and over again as he is morphed into something horrid, terrible, cruel.

Mikey blacks out. One last mercy his body bestows upon him, thankfully.

Mikey wakes up in agonizing pain. His limbs are a tangled, sloppy mess underneath him.

He can't move yet.

He can barely think.

All he can do is breathe and cry. The tears burn against his cheeks.

The position he's lying in gives his tortured limbs a numb buzz of pins and needles. Mikey tries to sit up, but trips over his arms and legs.

He doesn't know how to move them anymore.

They hurt too much. He can't feel them, but every movement he makes sends a rippling effect of horrid pain throughout his body.

There's something in here with him. A snake... a serpent... it slithers away from him. The slithering hurts... it... is it part of him...?

Mikey's eyes flutter open and closed as he fights to stay awake... and then fights to fall back asleep, be put out of his misery and just be unconscious. He doesn't want to hurt anymore.

His throat feels like it was mangled, burned, crushed.

His eyes sting like acid was poured into the tear ducts.

His hands ache, the palms are cut from where he dug his sharp nails and claws into them.

His feet must be disfigured, as far as he can tell.

His back is broken, the shell is shattered and cracked; he can feel air filtrating inside it.

But his head hurts the most. It is heavy and impossible to lift up. It aches and stings and pounds in a hundred different ways. His ears are stuffed up and ringing loudly. He's dizzy and disoriented. He's... so confused and lost... he doesn’t know how he got here. He doesn’t know what happened to him, or why he's hurting, or what he did to deserve this...

He doesn't know why he's longing for someone to hold him.

Someone that is blue. Or red. Or purple.

He's... he's unsure what those shadows dancing in his mind are, who those silhouettes belong to. But they mean something. They'll be coming for him, soon.

How he knows this, he isn't sure.

But he's a little scared for when they do find him...

Because, while he doesn’t know much...

...He knows he isn't 'Mikey' anymore.

He tries to sit up again. He somehow manages to do it, for two full seconds, before almost passing out again and falling to the floor of the cage, hitting his head against the metal.

Don't try to get up, Instinct whispers. Don't move yet. Rest. No moving, just rest. I will protect us now.

Mikey doesn't need to be told that twice...

His eyes slip shut.

Prev || Next

[ineffable-kelpie]

Rating: T

Chapters: 9/9

Wordcount: 39,657

Summary: After leaving Crowley to return to Heaven, Aziraphale Falls, certain that no one will help him pick himself back up. Crowley proves him wrong.

(Updates every Sunday)

[guqin-and-flute]

WIP...Thriday (aka proof I'm not dead and still writing)

An And A-Fu Makes 4 Chpt. 7 exerpt in which A-Fu and Wangji are equally bemused by each other

__

It turned out that his uncle was actually pretty funny. Not totally, like, ‘haha’ funny, but ‘different from what A-Fu was used to’ funny.  A-Fu had always thought that his face was blank most of the time, but he found out that wasn't true--he smiled and frowned and looked worried and annoyed just like everyone else. His expressions were just super tiny compared to other people, so you had to study his face as hard as school, but A-Fu was getting the hang of it. If he didn’t get something, A-Yuan could usually interperate for him pretty good, ‘cause he was an expert Hanguang-jun interperatator. He knew what all the different tones of ‘A-Yuan’ meant when apparently it was supposed to be a whole sentence that meant ‘time for bed' or ‘too loud’ or ‘not that way’ or ‘did you finish your homework?’ or ‘do you want to play guqin with me?’

Uncle Wangji sorta reminded A-Fu of Gray-Father and how sometimes he looked so serious and scary to other people, but you just had to know what they meant to say on the inside. Except unlike Gray-Father, Uncle Wangji had never laughed in front of A-Fu; but when he and A-Yuan did something silly together, he sometimes had a little bit of Laughing Eyes, just like Blue-Father did. Maybe A-Fu was a gray, blue, and yellow father interperatator? Maybe after staying at the Jingshi, he could become an Uncle Wangji one, too! 

Sometimes his uncle was ‘haha’ funny, usually by accident and usually because he didn’t really get A-Fu--a lot of the things he did seemed to confuse him; like how he liked mud and salamanders and toads, and how he hated wearing socks to bed, and how he got an idea to do things but then didn’t really think about how it might end up and then he fell over or broke something, sometimes. Then, Uncle Wangji would get a little wrinkle, right in between his eyebrows, like he was trying to figure out a hard math problem and his mouth would get all small and he would blink reaaaal slow. Sometimes, he even looked over at A-Yuan like he needed his help as an A-Fu Interpretator--which he kinda was, since he was A-Fu’s bestest friend in the whole entire world and knew him better than anyone.  

Uncle Wangji definitely didn’t get Sneaking-and-Snooping, and when A-Fu actually really did surprise him a couple times, his uncle said all serious that he knew A-Fu was there, he just didn’t expect him to jump out and yell at him and A-Fu said uh-huh sure he did, suuure, and Uncle Wangji would just coolly say ‘good’ that A-Fu was sure--but he would say it like he knew that A-Fu was being sarcasms and was agreeing just to make him annoyed, which it did ‘cause that’s not how sarcasms worked, Uncle Wangji! And his uncle would say, without any hint of a smile, that he would try to remember that, which A-Fu figured was sort of like a joke and it made him laugh. 

One day, when A-Fu got in trouble with his teacher because he had colored his whole tongue black with his paintbrush during class just because, he had been really anxious about when his uncle came to pick them up from school. After talking to the teacher for a bit at the desk, he came over and stood all tall in front of A-Fu. When he looked all the way up at him, he  saw that scrunchy-confused wrinkle on his face but all he said was, “...Why?”

“Uh. I dunno.”

“....” Uncle Wangji said things with his silences best of anyone A-Fu knew, and this silence was like a whole bunch of question marks, like A-Fu was some sort of mystery. When he looked over at A-Yuan, who was waiting patiently by the door with his stuff all packed up, A-Yuan just shook his head and shrugged. 

 Uncle Wangji just looked back at him for another second, then just turned and walked right out the door, hand behind his back, not even waiting.

A-Fu assumed that that meant something like ‘let’s go home, you’re not in trouble, but what the heck’, so he just happily trotted out after him into the sunshine with A-Yuan next to him. He must have been getting better at understanding his uncle’s silences, because all that happened when they got back to the Jingshi was that he was handed a cool, damp cloth from the fancy wash basin in the corner and told, “Do not eat paint.”

He tried to explain around sticking out his tongue and scrubbing, “I wa’n’t ea’ing i’, I wath theeing if I coul’ color i’ all in,” but Uncle Wangji didn’t say anything else about it and just sat down at his table play his guqin.

[currentlyreadingawesomefanfics]

I haven’t updated my fanfic because I don’t feel like editing 2,446+ words only to finish chapter ten and have to edit even more—

[imekitty]

Today I worked on:

Disillusioned: 303 words

Last sentence written:

Yes, that was right, down on the floor like a good—

[samijey]

(Monday Night RAW 16/10/2023)

[laxmiree]

[CN] MLQC Season 2 Chapter 56 Translation [Lucien’s Part]-(2/2)

⚠️  SPOILER ALERT  ⚠️

This post contains a VERY HEAVY SPOILER for the chapter that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

I see your darkness, your failures, your confusion.

"Are you leaving?"

His deep gaze makes my heart tremble, and his tight grip on my hand feels as if he wants to imprison me here forever.

I purse my lips and gaze into the depths of his dark eyes, confronting the obscurity and paranoia lurking within.

Translation under the cut!

[Previous Part-> Click Here]

—[Chapter 56-15]—

Next, Lucien and I search the orphanage thoroughly under the cover of the night. Along the way, we inevitably trigger hidden rules, failing the mission several times.

We stop at the entrance of an underground secret chamber as the moon begins to fade away, and I look at Lucien.

MC: Do you want to go in?

Lucien: Mm, it seems that the door is locked though. We might need a key.

MC: No need, watch this!

I proudly take out my lockpicking tools from my backpack and fiddle with the lock. Then, with a click, the door opens.

Lucien's eyebrows furrow slightly, but his eyes squint with a smile, appearing somewhat resigned but also amused, as if he didn't expect this turn of events.

Lucien: As a mentor, I'm surprised to learn that this classmate also possesses lockpicking skills.

MC: Hehe, I have plenty of skill points to spare, and with Professor Lucien being so capable, I thought I'd invest in some odd skills.

MC: Lockpicking, tracking footprints, beast hunting... If I see something fun, I'll learn it.

MC: Otherwise, in "Odyssey", wouldn't I have to rely on Professor Lucien for everything?

Lucien is amused by my demeanor, and he bends his eyes, showing a hint of interest in them.

Lucien: Then I'll look forward to experiencing this classmate's diverse "life skills" in the future.

Pushing open the door, a cold, stark white light suddenly appears. I enter the secret room with Lucien one after another.

I squint my eyes slightly, waiting for them to adjust to the light, and in front of me, many unknown cold white devices come into view.

A massive amount of documents is locked in cabinets and some handwritten notes are scattered across several tables, documenting the experiments being conducted here.

Lucien stands in front of the desk, flipping through several experiment records, his brow furrowed.

Lucien: These children are involved in an experiment to synchronize their minds. Once the experiment succeeds, they will become "puppets" that can be manipulated by others.

MC: But... what is the purpose of such experiments?

Lucien: Not entirely sure yet, but I did see the signature of the sponsor of these experiments.

I take the list he handed me. "Angel Adoption Center", “Childhood Charity Association", "Neurological Research Institute"...

As I look at these words written in black and white, a chill emanates from the depths of my heart, slowly spreading throughout my body.

Children who should have received special care are instead becoming experimental subjects at the mercy of others in the dark basement.

What should be a joyful paradise for children turns out to be a breeding ground for evil to satisfy the desires of adults…

The indoor walls are painted snow white, under the pale light, we feel as if we are trapped in a lab rat's cage.

The familiar scene almost makes my hands tremble, I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

MC: …Lucien, have you found any new clues on your end?

I wait for a while, but there is no response from Lucien.

I open my eyes in confusion, only to see an icicle hurtling towards me, aimed directly at my forehead!

I instinctively roll to dodge and crash heavily onto the cold ground.

MC: Ugh…!

The icicle lodges tightly into the ground, piercing through a strand of my hair. I gasp and turn to look at Lucien.

With one hand gripping the report, his other hand hanging limply and emitting a chill. Lucien's face is frozen in shock.

MC: What's going on... Could it be?

Subconsciously, I recall the myriad of hidden rules in this place. Have we unwittingly violated something again?

Is ‘’you can't read the experiment report" also an unwritten rule of the orphanage? But why weren't we teleported out this time?

MC: Lucien, we…

Lucien: MC.

His voice is chillingly cold, carrying an inexplicable danger. I turn my head to see veins bulging on his forehead like ice cracks as if he's struggling to restrain something.

Lucien: [sternly] Just... abandon the mission.

Before I could ask anything, another icicle pierces straight into the ground right beside my foot, sending a chilling sensation through me.

Lucien: [SHOUTING] ….MC, RUN!

As the words register, I finally realize what's happening. I sprint forward, but as soon as my foot hits the ground, the space distorts, and I'm instantly back in front of him.

MC: Ah, sprinting is futile! I forgot that you can also space-fold!

Since I can't leave this underground facility, I'm forced into a relentless chase with Lucien within this confined space.

An icicle shoots towards me at lightning speed, and I can almost feel the freezing sensation brushing against my skin—

However, the icicle grazes past me at the last moment, mercilessly severing just a strand of my hair.

I turn around to find Lucien breathing heavily, as if he just exerted himself to regain a moment of consciousness, barely managing to deflect the icicle.

And I'm not doing so well either. To avoid his onslaught, I've almost used up all the items in my backpack.

The only thing that might still be useful... is this rope.

MC: I have no choice but to spare no effort…

I suddenly stand still on the ground, not dodging the incoming icicles.

In an instant, the icicles seem to veer slightly, grazing hard past my shoulder. I grunt in pain, and in the corner of my eye, I see Lucien's figure pause.

Now's the time!

I swiftly unleash my "Beast Hunter" skill, and the rope descends from the sky, tying Lucien tightly.

MC: Success….!

The next second, silver-white streaks cut through the air, and a barrage of ice spikes slice through my rope.

MC: ...It's over.

Is the mission going to fail again? I close my eyes, waiting to be respawned back to the orphanage.

Yet the next moment, I find myself falling into an embrace.

Lucien: MC, it's okay now.

I open my eyes, gazing at Lucien dazedly.

His eyes regain that familiar gentleness, though the coldness seems not to have entirely dissipated.

MC: Have you... regained control?

Lucien gently curled his lips and winked his crystal-clear eyes at me, but it was as if he had used up all his strength.

—[Chapter 56-17]—

-You've discovered the orphanage's conspiracy; it's time to make a choice with your mentor.

As soon as I walk out of the basement, the system pops up with a new prompt.

MC: Of course, these conspiracies must be exposed to the public!

MC: Otherwise, I would be letting down the children in the night division, the children waiting outside... and even letting down my childhood self!

Lucien: It seems MC really empathizes with this mission.

Lucien smiles as he watches me angrily select the "expose conspiracy" option, making the same choice as me.

MC: For the children of the Night Division, this orphanage must be a complicated place.

MC: It provides them with a living environment, yet pushes them towards hell…

I take a deep breath, feeling somewhat melancholic.

MC: I wonder how long it will take to dispel the trauma left here for them…

Lucien: Perhaps what lingers in one's life is more than just the haunting trauma.

As he speaks, a hint of snow-colored moonlight seeps into Lucien's eyes, cold yet beautiful.

Lucien: It's just that this soil no longer needs to continue preserving it.

MC: Are you suggesting…

Lucien: Let's do what couldn't be done in reality.

With that, he grabs my hand and turns back to the basement.

Twin Leaves Orphanage stands on the ground like a beached white whale gasping for its last breath on the shore, no one knows that its insides have rotted away.

But now, we have unearthed all of them, exposing them to the moonlight.

Lucien and I have transported all the books and equipment related to the experiments, piling up a series of decrepit items at the entrance of the orphanage.

He half squints his eyes, as if pondering the next move. Understanding his unspoken thoughts, I retrieve something from my backpack.

MC: Here, matches.

Lucien strikes the match, and the flame throbs in his hand, as if a powerful, vivid heart is being put into it.

In an instant, the flame shoots up into the sky, illuminating the words "Orphanage" at the entrance, consuming and burning away all the sins.

I take a deep breath of the scorching air, witnessing the imminent arrival of this new beginning.

Lucien: ….

In the corner of my eye, Lucien's figure comes into view.

He holds a burning record of experiments in his hand, silently watching the flames.

Against the backdrop of the blazing flames, his features outlined by the light appear increasingly cold and indifferent.

It’s even darker and colder than the moonlight.

MC: Lucien…?

The crackling of the flames drowns out my soft shouting. Lucien's figure is half-hidden in the shadows, revealing an indescribable loneliness and desolation.

I quietly walk up to his side, gently placing a hand on his arm.

MC: What are you thinking about?

Lucien shakes his head lightly, casually tossing the last remnants of the page into the fire.

Lucien: [chuckles lightly, then sighs] Just feeling like this scene is somewhat familiar, and I've come to understand something.

Lucien: Perhaps when faced with failure, looking back is also a choice.

Lucien: Maybe we can find answers among the things that have already been burned.

He smiles at me, the curve of his lips perfect yet distant. I gaze at his profile, silently tightening my grip on his hand.

Before my eyes, the flames roar fiercely, yet it feels almost chilling.

After sending all the children away, a halo of light appears and disappears around us, signaling the completion of the mission.

I look at Lucien, who has been silent since just now and squeeze his hand with concern.

MC: Are you tired? You look like you're not feeling well.

Lucien: …I'm fine.

Lucien: It's just that the mission we just had was a bit special, so I've been thinking about the reasons behind it.

MC: Special?

Seeing my confusion, Lucien furrows his brow, then speaks thoughtfully.

Lucien: …When being controlled by the game, what I felt was not the usual sensation of a mission… but rather something akin to the takeover of my central nervous system.

Lucien: This is the first time I've experienced such a sensation in a game.

Lucien: [quietly] …The feeling of being deprived of control over my consciousness is not good.

He speaks with indifference, but his eyes seem to be shrouded by a layer of darkness.

Thinking about how he looked just now, I worriedly reach out and touch the tired corners of Lucien's eyes.

MC: [worriedly] Is there anywhere you feel uncomfortable right now?

Lucien shakes his head, but I still can't help but feel a little worried.

MC: Could it be that we've been doing tasks for too long? Or maybe there's a bug on Infinite's side?

MC: If that's the case, no wonder it feels like the "hidden rules" this time are different, and neither of us got transported back to the orphanage…

Feeling anxious, I speak faster and faster until Lucien gently squeezes my hand, speaking in a soothing tone.

Lucien: [soothingly] We might need to look for the answer to this question within the game.

Lucien: Would you like to join me?

The warmth emanating from his palm feels different from before, now harboring a hint of burning nostalgia.

When Professor Lucien gets clingy, he's like a fox narrowing its eyes; I simply can't resist him.

A hint of sweetness wells up in my heart as I take a few steps forward with him.

MC: Alright, then I'll keep accompanying you to find the answers, anywhere you want to go.

✂———————–

We wander aimlessly along the path we come, watching together as the starry night is melted away by the sunlight.

Hand in hand, we cross the untouched stream, occasionally plucking flower buds together, knowing that new ones will soon bloom again.

The dew on the stones and the newly bloomed flowers tremble with each step we take, showcasing their vitality.

After hopping onto a slab of stone, I don't hear Lucien's voice. Turning around, I find him behind me, lost in thought with his head bowed.

During our leisurely and carefree stroll, I often catch glimpses of loneliness and coldness in his expression, tinged with sorrow.

Soon, he resumes his usual gentle smile, catching up to me as if those moments of cold loneliness were just insignificant illusions.

I hold his arm as I maintain a natural expression, and continue to talk and laugh with him without losing my smile.

I can feel restlessness in the corner of his heart, and the root of these changes—

Seems to lie outside of the game.

Walking through the night into a new day, as we witness the sunrise melting into the horizon once more, we find ourselves back at Lucien's home.

The morning light blankets the river, its ripples dancing in Lucien's eyes, as if a layer of mottled silver is painted across them.

I take a gentle breath of the air filled with the moisture of water and the fragrance of grass, then turn away and speak softly.

MC: Lucien, is there something... happening to you in the real world?

—[Chapter 56-18]—

The water gurgles as it flows, and an invisible silence spreads around us, concealing the warmth of the sun from our bodies.

I hear Lucien's light exhale as he reaches out to touch my cheek, prompting me to look back at him.

Lucien: MC, in front of you, I want to accompany you with a calming mood and a clear mind.

Lucien's gaze carries shattered dawnlight. He lowers his eyes, his tone calm and natural.

He didn't directly answer my question, yet it was as if he explained something.

It's as if he casually mentioned something irrelevant. He doesn't continue, instead he takes my hand and sits by the river with me.

His silence on the topic, and the way he skirts around it, leaves a lingering cloud of doubt in my heart.

Lucien has always been calm and composed, but in the places I cannot see, has he silently endured something I am unaware of?

The river breeze sweeps over our heads, tousling our hair. Watching Lucien's quiet profile, I can't help but speak up in the end.

MC: Lucien, when I came to see you today, I couldn't help but feel... that you may have encountered some "difficulties".

MC: It's just that at that moment, I felt like you didn't want to talk about it, so I thought of spending some fun and relaxing time with you first.

MC: Actually, I should have just told you directly…

With both of my hands cradling his face, our eyes meet, and I speak firmly.

MC: We've been through so much together. No matter what difficulties we encounter, haven't we always faced them together?

MC: Tell me about the difficulties you're facing, okay?

Lucien looks at me, sighs softly, and rests his forehead against mine. Our breaths mingle, tracing each other's heartbeats.

Lucien: [inhales then sighs longly]…

His eyelashes tremble a few times, and he embraces me tightly, warm breath murmuring softly in my ear.

Lucien: [whispers softly and quietly] Then let me... tell you myself.

After Lucien finished speaking, he logged off. I take a deep breath and then log off as soon as I see his avatar turn gray.

The lingering light of the setting sun dances through the windows. It's been almost half a day since I went to see Lucien.

It's the first time I've been online in "Odyssey" for so long. After leaving the game, I feel a wave of dizziness flooding my mind.

The light from the hallway in the research institute seeps through the gap in the laboratory door and the lights inside the room are off.

The room is filled with the dim yellow of dusk, with the steadily dissipating setting sun as the sole source of light.

Lucien sits beside me, the twilight casting shadows on his clear and refined face, making it difficult for me to discern his expression.

I get up to turn on the light, but a gentle touch brushes against my cheek.

Just like how I cradle his face in the game, my face is being held up by his cold hands.

A pair of eyes shining with a cold gleam lock onto my gaze.

As we're within a very close distance, Lucien's body emanates a faint chill, as if submerged in seawater, yet his gaze is blazing hot and surging.

Lucien: [quietly and softly] Are you leaving?

MC: I'm not leaving, I just want to turn on the light…

Lucien: …Don't turn on the light.

A cold breath brushes past my cheek. Lucien takes a deep breath, his gaze flickering.

Lucien: …Just stay here quietly by my side like this.

Lucien's tone remains gentle, but his hand firmly grasps mine without any explanation, rendering me unable to move.

He looks deeply into my eyes as if seeing something through me.

His deep gaze makes my heart tremble, and his tight grip on my hand feels as if he wants to imprison me here forever.

I purse my lips and gaze into the depths of his dark eyes, confronting the obscurity and paranoia lurking within.

His grasp on my palm feels burning hot, with a slight tremble that's barely perceptible, as if it's desperately restraining something about to burst out.

I don't know why he's like this, but I know one thing— he wants me to stay by his side.

So I take the initiative to open my arms and embrace him tightly.

MC: Alright, I'll stay right here, not going anywhere. So... don't force yourself.

I feel his body stiffen, before his arms around me tighten and embrace me harder, as if he wants to meld me into his body, causing a bit of pain.

The last glimmer of twilight fades away, and in the darkness, I hug him tightly for a long time.

The breath by our ears and the heartbeat pressed against each other’s chest gradually sync in frequency, becoming our sole yet intimate form of communication.

Feeling the breath of the person in my arms has gradually calmed down, I softly ask him.

MC: Shall we go turn on the lights together?

The person in my embrace remains silent. I hold his hand and slowly stroke his back.

MC: I want to see you, Lucien.

There's a pause on his breath, and then a faint rustle of our rubbing clothes follows.

I'm pulled into a tighter embrace and he moves a few steps. Immediately after, the lights switch on.

Under the cold light of the laboratory, I notice the dark circles under Lucien's eyes, standing out prominently.

I let him hold me as my fingertips slowly touched the proof of his fatigue.

MC: How many hours have you been sleeping lately?

Lucien: ...This week, it adds up to three hours.

Lucien closes his eyes and presses his face against my palm, his brows furrowing unconsciously. I pause, then gently massage his forehead.

MC: Does your head hurt a lot?

Lucien: It hurts.

He doesn't open his eyes, but his brows relax slightly. His hoarse voice seeped into my ears, tinged with a hint of vulnerability.

...Remembering Lucien's appearance the last time he lost control, my heart tightens.

This isn't the first time. It's been happening since a few months ago and there have been subtle signs of this.

Lucien: This kind of headache prevents me from concentrating and stabilizing my emotions for research, causing progress to slow down.

He opens his eyes, seeming to have recovered a lot, and loosens his tight grasp on my hands.

Lucien: But in the game, I can escape from physical discomfort and think more freely, which leads to faster research progress. So I believe this is a great way to do it.

His tone becomes calm again, even indifferent as if the person suffering the torture is not himself.

I embrace him distressfully, my eyes involuntarily becoming moist.

After a long while, I hear his calm voice ringing beside my ear.

Lucien: MC, it's from Evol's deterioration.

—[Chapter 56-19]—

I startle, lifting my head to look at him.

Although there's a vague premonition in my heart, I still uncontrollably feel a sharp pain hearing these calm words.

MC: Lucien…

I open my mouth, but all that escapes is his name. My eyes sting with tears, blurring the person in front of me.

From the moment he broke NW's glass chamber and carried me out from there, I had already noticed some subtle differences.

All the things that I couldn't figure out before, now seem to have answers.

Without effective treatment, the deterioration symptoms of Evolvers will only worsen, leading inevitably to death or premature demise.

Lucien is no exception to this.

So much has happened recently, with no events related to deterioration occurring, I've almost pushed it out of my mind.

The grim memories flood back into my mind, and I take a sharp breath.

I forgot.

I forgot that the conflicts arising from deterioration had only temporarily receded into the depths, but the symptoms of the illness had never disappeared.

They still spread and feed on their host like parasites.

I look at Lucien before me, his complexion much dimmer than before, and his lips are as pale as autumn frost.

MC: I genuinely forgot, Lucien…

Even if Lucien had never mentioned it, I should have checked for changes in his physical condition.

Lucien is so adept at feigning normalcy and enduring; enduring pain, enduring collapse, enduring…… deterioration…

Now, with even him unable to bear it, just how far has his deterioration progressed?

I dare not dwell on it, feeling tears welling up in my eyes, yet Lucien simply gently and slowly holds my hand in his palm.

Lucien: Don't blame yourself. It's just some unavoidable problems with my body. Moreover, our recent research on deterioration has been going smoothly.

MC: Have there been any breakthroughs?

I blink quickly to conceal the glisten of moisture in my eyes.

Lucien shakes his head, deliberating as he simplifies the complex process of his findings.

Lucien: For a long time, the drugs developed have shown limited effectiveness in clinical settings.

Lucien: Yesterday, the final clinical trial of the last drug also concluded, and the result was a failure.

MC: ….

I open my mouth, but feeling a sudden heaviness in my heart, many thoughts that had bubbled to my lips now dissolve into nothingness.

MC: ...Then why is it going smoothly?

Lucien notices my emotions and, in turn, comforts me by gently squeezing my hand.

Lucien: Because this failure is the most special one.

Lucien: For years, all the solutions in the field of biomedicine for deterioration, the biological material—

Lucien: Have been extracted from ordinary people and Evolvers, then applied to Evolvers.

Lucien: The failure of clinical trials proves that both paths we've been pursuing for so long are wrong, so we can only find another way.

He looks at me, his gaze filled with certainty about the conclusion, completely unconcerned about how shocking his words sound.

Lucien: The biological material to cure deterioration is neither in ordinary people nor in Evolvers.

My head spins a bit, leaving only one path, neither ordinary people nor Evolvers…

Who else could it be? Could it possibly be... me?

As if guessing what I'm thinking, he shakes his head.

Lucien: CORE is indeed a perfect gene, but it is not replicable, what I mean is, for example...

Seeing him about to think again, I blurt out almost in a panic.

MC: ...F-for example, relying on aliens?!

Lucien: Aliens? [chuckles lightly] That's also a possibility.

My scattered thoughts amuse Lucien, causing a slight curl of his lips.

Lucien: If there really are aliens, I would definitely think of a way to capture them for research.

Our conversation started on a somber note and ended with Lucien's playful joke.

The lights in the lab are glaring in the darkness of the evening, and I'm just thinking about how to ensure Lucien gets a good night's sleep tonight—

Lucien seems to have anticipated my thoughts. He stops in his tracks, not allowing me to lead him out of the lab.

Lucien: You've already helped me a lot today and provided me with new inspiration.

Looking back on my actions throughout the day, nothing seems particularly special. I furrow my brow, looking at him in confusion.

MC: Did I?

Lucien smiles and smooths out my furrowed brow, extending his hand to me.

Lucien: Can you accompany me somewhere now?

✂———————–

As the sunset bathes the earth, Lucien and I become solitary figures amidst the tranquil twilight, walking side by side in the quiet evening.

Lucien: Watch your step, give me your hand.

I take his hand and we walk around a cement wall, feeling a bit curious.

MC: I didn't expect there to be such a large expanse of ruins behind the research center…

Lucien: From here onwards, this used to be the territory of the research institute. However, after the reconstruction of Ultima Bioscience Research Institute, this area has been abandoned.

As we walk, Lucien vividly recounts the research heyday of the research institute.

Lucien: There were multiple laboratories, control rooms, and even a display center here…

I listen to Lucien describe in detail the comprehensive facilities that once existed in the main building, and I can't help but be amazed and impressed.

The completeness and capacity of this abandoned area are rare even in today's research institutions.

Despite being abandoned, one can still see how grand its building area was back then.

Now, the walls of the buildings above ground in the main building are mottled and fragile, crumbling at a mere touch due to lack of maintenance.

Lucien: When the research direction of the research institute was first proposed, it attracted a lot of attention.

MC: From your description, this place must have been filled with talented individuals.

Lucien: Mm, at that time, the main research direction was to find methods to delay or even reverse deterioration through gene editing and cell manipulation experiments.

Lucien: And leading the team was a highly respected scientific researcher, Mr. Xu.

[T/N: Mr. Xu (徐) in this has a different surname  from Lucien's Xu [许] surname]

I look at him in surprise as he leads me through the ruins, his gaze calm.

Lucien: But the field of gene editing inevitably involves modifications that could potentially be irreversible to human genetic material.

Lucien: You can guess what happened next.

MC: There must have been a lot of controversy.

Lucien pauses his steps gently, his tone cold and distant.

Lucien: One could even say that it was sensational.

—[Chapter 56-20]—

The twilight seems to have grown even darker.

I exhale softly into my hand, listening as Lucien continues to recount the difficulties faced by the research team in those years.

Lucien: Soon, some people raised objections that this violated academic ethics and norms. They went to Mr. Xu's office to exert pressure, using both soft and hard tactics.

MC: Indeed... it's something expected.

Lucien: Mm, after such ethical controversies persisted for a while, they significantly impacted the progress of the research.

Lucien: Afterwards, the research outcomes also failed to meet the standards for an extended period, leading to a decline in external funding support and morale within the research team.

Lucien's voice is steady as he narrates the end of this place's story.

Lucien: Ultimately, due to technical limitations and insufficient understanding of the nature of the deteriorating disease, the key samples were damaged.

Lucien: This incident became the final straw that broke the camel's back, causing the management to completely lose confidence in the research direction.

The wind whispers through this now desolate wasteland as if sighing at the hasty conclusion of a grand tale.

Lucien: The research team disbanded, and the complete abandonment of the base became the final chapter of this place.

Just like dominoes, one problem leads to another, ultimately leading to failure here.

Lucien retrieves a fragile, weathered page from the ground, its surface bearing faint traces of burn marks.

Lucien: For me, this base is like those "dark pasts" we burned in the game today.

MC: So, back then, when you were staring at the flames in a trance...

Lucien: When the flames lit up, I recalled those research contents that were "burned" due to failure.

Lucien: The drugs developed at that time did indeed temporarily repair the defects in the Evolver gene, resulting in experimental subjects exhibiting extraordinary enhancements in abilities.

Lucien: However, this enhancement came at a cost. It resulted in excessive accumulation of Evol energy in the body, rapidly draining the life of the subjects.

Lucien narrates the story as if it’s not a big deal, yet I'm listening with cold sweat trickling down my spine.

Lucien: Even after all these years, no one has looked back at those failed research endeavors, myself included.

He turns to me, a faint smile playing at the corners of his lips.

Lucien: But today's orphanage mission has given me new ideas.

Lucien: Perhaps, within these 'burned' pasts, there indeed exists some useful information.

Guided by Lucien, I explore cautiously, sidestepping collapsed walls, navigating around dusty stairs, and avoiding dilapidated benches.

Step by step, I tour the area, using my feet as a ruler to measure the former grandeur of this place.

It feels as if I'm transported back to the past, witnessing firsthand the research institute's rapid decline after a brief moment of glory.

I had assumed that we would continue to wander through every corner of the research institute until Lucien suddenly came to a halt.

Following his gaze, I peer ahead to see that the corridor in front of us looks as if it has been subjected to an explosion.

Glass and rubble are scattered around us, blocking the path ahead. Unless cleared, it’s impossible for us to proceed.

Lucien falls silent, his gaze lowering as if lost in memories.

I don't disturb him and quietly wait by his side.

To me, it's just an abandoned research institute, a relic of a bygone era. But for him, it surely holds memories of his own.

After a moment, Lucien turns to me, a faint smile gracing his face.

Lucien: Come on, let's go back.

MC: Is that all? No more searching?

Lucien's eyes are filled with traces of memories, but he doesn't linger. He simply gazes up at the sky above this wasteland.

The sky from years ago had the same sunset as today.

Lucien: This is enough.

Lucien had no intention of going home to rest and insisted on continuing to research at the research institute.

I can only insist on escorting him to the entrance of the research institute and bidding him farewell downstairs.

Under the moonlight, our shadows are stretched long, occasionally overlapping with my careless footsteps.

I ponder the ending of that story and can't help but cautiously ask the question that has always lingered in my mind.

MC: Lucien, what happened to the supervisor who led the group after the team disbanded?

Lucien: He has a very realistic ending.

Lucien: Faced with overwhelming pressure and the irreparable setback, he chose to leave the field of biological sciences and went to teach in remote mountain areas.

Lucien: Now, he should continue teaching in some mountainous region.

I have a feeling inside that's hard to describe as if there are pieces of cotton soaked in water stuffed into my heart, permeated with a heavy sense of worry.

Lucien: Don't worry, in the journey of scientific research, coming to a dead end without any particular reason is the most common thing.

In reality, the night wind is even more biting than in "Odyssey," Lucien straightens my coat.

Lucien: Besides, whatever price failure demands, it's all within our expectations.

Lucien's gaze is gentle yet subtly imbued with an unparalleled dedication.

I meet his gaze and eventually nod with a smile, wrapping my arms around his neck and nuzzling him affectionately.

Lucien also pulls me into a tight hug, and we exchange each other's body heat, enjoying the silent moment in tacit understanding.

Just then, the phone rings abruptly. I pick it up and see that it's a call from my work partner.

I quickly answer the phone and exchange a few words. After hanging up, I glance at Lucien, hesitating as if wanting to say something but holding back.

Lucien: [softly] Do you still have work to attend to?

I nod and hug Lucien tightly with reluctance, unwilling to part with him.

MC: Our partner isn't quite satisfied with our plan and wants me to take charge and revise it.

Lucien: Then, I'll call a cab for you.

Feeling somewhat sad and reluctant, I tighten my grip on his sleeve, looking into his eyes.

MC: [worriedly] Lucien, I know you're dealing with something very difficult alone.

MC: Although my power is small, if you need me... I'll be there.

MC: Whether you need the power of the CORE or simply need me.

Lucien: Don't worry, I certainly will need you. After all, I'll need you more than you imagine.

His eyebrows arch slightly as he gazes into my eyes, a hint of a smile playing on his lips.

I hop into the taxi, and Lucien stands there, watching me leave. Until the car turns the street corner, his reassuring figure is still in sight.

✂———————–

The building of the research institute is also shrouded in moonlight, gradually disappearing into the concrete and steel jungle of the city.

The corridor is brightly lit. The high-wattage lights are unadorned, making the bright areas even more dazzling and the shadows even darker.

Lucien walks back to his dimly lit office alone.

He reaches into a corner of the filing cabinet that hasn't been opened in a long time, finding only a brittle yellowed piece of paper inside.

The light from the corridor spills into the office, and the red emergency exit lights are on, providing enough illumination to see the entire contents of the paper.

[Name: Xu Yijian, Cause of Death: Explosion caused by laboratory sample leakage.]

[Due to severe damage at the scene, there is currently no evidence of human factors, and it is deemed as an incident.]

✂———————–

[Afterword, rambles, and highlight(s)]

After MONTHS of foreshadowing and subtle signs in both the main story (especially chapter 45 + Chapter 51) and R&S, the deterioration finally takes a toll on Lucien. The main focus revolves around the long-awaited arrival of the deteriorating disease event, marking a crucial turning point in the storyline. In this sort-of-analysis want to highlight and talk about the underlying theme of this chapter and what the future may hold for his main story sub-plot.

[Odyssey]

MC: I signed a collaboration with Infinite for their new game, and today, I’m going to try out their gaming equipment. Lucien: Is it the game called “Odyssey”? MC: Oh, you know about it too? Lucien: Since the first-generation products of GA, they’ve been using a lot of technology related to brainwaves and data conversion. [S2 Chapter 51]

As I mentioned at the beginning of this chapter translation, Odyssey is a hyper-realistic VR game developed by a company called Infinite. Their technology not only allows players to see and hear in the realistic game world but also to touch, taste, and smell as they interact with it.

To enter the game, players need to put on a device called Golden Apple (GA for short). Not only that, but the game also incorporates AI technology into it. Infinite has a lot of technologies that are said to be "out of this world, besides AI they also develop other things yet to be revealed.

MC: I never expected that the charm of "Odyssey" would be so great that even Professor Lucien has become an "Internet Addict". I clear my throat and then nonchalantly add a "harmless" little question. MC: Lately, it seems like I've been seeing you online often. Is the work at the Ultima Bioscience Research Institute relatively easy?

MC notices that Lucien has been spending a lot of time online in the game. Although Lucien explains that he does so because it's quieter and allows him to focus better, but is the reason really that simple?

[Children of Night Division - Emotional Neglect and Loneliness]

Ever since the start, the mission has felt very personal to them. Why did the mission lead them to the exact place that can trigger trauma for both Lucien and MC over their pasts? Why does the mission lore bear an uncanny resemblance to what they experienced as children? How did a mere game take over the human nervous center, isn’t this technology dangerous?

MC: I can't shake the feeling that this orphanage mission seems to have some sort of prototype reference... like the mirrored building we encountered before. MC: There's a kind of... indescribable familiarity in my heart.

I have two theories:

The game digs into their memory and with AI technology, uses it to create such a mission, raising the stakes for both of them

Infinite has some information about BS experiments and besides using it to develop its technology, Infinite also uses it as a ‘prototype reference’ for the AI to develop a mission, resulting in such a mission.

I don’t know which theory is more f*cked up, be it the game gaining data from the players without their consent or them using those kinds of data to design the game:” therefore also exploited the orphanage children indirectly…

Anyway, both theories can explain the sudden takeover of Lucien’s consciousness. Because the ‘data’ gained from them (be it their memory or BS experiment file) have him as part of the orphanage experiment. So, I speculate that the game can control him because it considers him part of the "night division"... Let me explain a bit more.

The orphanage segregates children into night and day divisions based on their performance and physical condition. Observing their demeanor during classes, it seems plausible that the night division comprises children deemed academically proficient.

As I look at these words written in black and white, a chill emanates from the depths of my heart, slowly spreading throughout my body. Children who should have received special care are instead becoming experimental subjects at the mercy of others in the dark basement. What should be a joyful paradise for children turns out to be a breeding ground for evil to satisfy the desires of adults…

Lucien's past in Black Swan (BS) shares striking similarities with the experiences of the children in the night division. Like them, he was subjected to experimentation and exploitation. [Till Dawn R&S].  While he may have consented to some extent, there is definitely some manipulation involved in shaping a child into a tool for BS.

MC: For the children of the Night Division, this orphanage must be a complicated place. MC: It provides them with a living environment, yet pushes them towards hell…

BS provided him with a living environment that allowed him to survive, but it also pushed him towards a hell where he had no time to contemplate his circumstances. He was constantly driven to keep running, with his emotional needs completely neglected. While he may not have experienced physical abuse later on, the emotional neglect he endured as a child is a form of abuse in itself.

Lucien: I think maybe it's not resistance, but rather she also needs an opportunity to connect with you. Lucien: When you talk to her, although her reactions are a bit cold, her body always unconsciously moves closer toward you. Lucien: Rather than resistance, it might be more like "not good at" or "not daring" to communicate with you. My heart tightens. Could it be that the reason why these children from the Night Divisions are so quiet... is because of similar reasons? Children in orphanages are already more prone to feeling lonely than others. A girl who struggles to communicate is even more susceptible to being ignored to some extent.

Emotional neglect can lead to difficulties in emotional regulation, low self-esteem, relationship challenges, and insecure attachment styles, which can all contribute to feelings of loneliness. People who experience emotional neglect can have trouble expressing emotions effectively, leading to isolation and a belief that they don't deserve love or connection.

Even prior to the car accident, Lucien struggled with understanding and expressing his emotions. His time on BS exacerbated this issue. Despite his outward demeanor of indifference, it's clear that he experiences deep loneliness (please read this good analysis about Lucien and his loneliness lol).

Lucien: Some children develop a dependency on specific plush items during their growth process, finding a sense of security in them. Lucien: I think, this scarf might be just that special existence for her.

Besides loneliness, children who experience emotional neglect can develop feelings of insecurity. Emotional neglect involves not receiving the emotional support, validation, and nurturance that are crucial for healthy emotional development. When children do not feel valued, heard, or understood by others, they may internalize these experiences and develop a sense of insecurity about themselves and their relationships. This insecurity can manifest in various ways, such as seeking comfort from special objects like plush toys or blankets. I will come back to this later ;)

Lucien: These children are involved in an experiment to synchronize their minds. Once the experiment succeeds, they will become "puppets" that can be manipulated by others.

The purpose of these experiments was to create puppets that could be manipulated by others. And guess who suddenly found themselves being manipulated by the game?

With one hand gripping the report, the other hanging limply, emitting a chill, his face frozen in shock. MC: What's going on... Could it be? Subconsciously, I recall the myriad of hidden rules in this place. Have we unwittingly violated something again? Is ‘’you can't read the experiment report' also an unwritten rule of the orphanage? But why weren't we teleported out this time? - Lucien: MC. His voice is chillingly cold, carrying an inexplicable danger. I turn my head to see veins bulging on his forehead like ice cracks as if he's struggling to restrain something. Lucien: [sternly] Just... abandon the mission. Before I could ask anything, another icicle pierces straight into the ground beside my foot, sending a chilling sensation through me.

Freaking, Lucien.

From all the coincidences and connections, we can theorize that according to the game, Lucien is the result of the experiments, which enables the game to freely manipulate him. According to the game, Lucien IS part of the night division!

also, can I point out that loss of control has been one of the constant symptoms of his deterioration disease, which means that this accident can be a foreshadowing of a future ‘knife’ where Lucien loses control and accidentally hurts MC-

Luckily, Lucien managed to regain control in the end, ~though this experience undoubtedly added extra trauma for him~. After uncovering the conspiracy, they both chose to expose it. However, Lucien proposed something unexpected.

Lucien: Perhaps what lingers in one's life is more than just the haunting trauma. As he speaks, a hint of snow-colored moonlight seeps into Lucien's eyes, cold yet beautiful. Lucien: It's just that this soil no longer needs to continue preserving it. MC: Are you suggesting… Lucien: Doing what couldn't be done in reality. - Lucien strikes the match, and the flame throbs in his hand, as if a powerful, vivid heart is being put into it. In an instant, the flame shoots up into the sky, illuminating the words "Orphanage" at the entrance, consuming and burning away all the sins. I take a deep breath of the scorching air, witnessing the imminent arrival of this new beginning.

He suggested burning everything. Perhaps it is his emotional catharsis over his past. Burning can symbolize purification and a new beginning, a way to get rid of past sins and start anew. By suggesting this drastic action, he might be seeking closure and a sense of control over the painful events that transpired, although it can only be done in-game:”.

[Deterioration]

The crackling of the flames drowns out my soft shouting. Lucien's figure is half-hidden in the shadows, revealing an indescribable loneliness and desolation.

During our leisurely and carefree stroll, I often catch glimpses of loneliness and coldness in his expression, tinged with sorrow. Soon, he resumes his usual gentle smile, catching up to me as if those moments of cold loneliness were just insignificant illusions.

Throughout the chapter, MC keeps catching glimpses of his loneliness and sorrow. which leads me to ponder: with such a heavy burden of facing his own mortality and failures after failures... has he been carrying it alone for so long?

In this chapter, it’s the first time… we see him actually being so close to death as if there's a death countdown ticking with each breath.

Just like how I cradle his face in the game, my face is being held up by his cold hands. A pair of eyes shining with a cold gleam lock onto my gaze. As we're within a very close distance, Lucien's body emanates a faint chill, as if submerged in seawater, yet his gaze is blazing hot and surging. Lucien: Are you leaving? MC: I'm not leaving, I just want to turn on the light… Lucien: …Don't turn on the light.

Confronted with his own mortality, despite his usual indifference, Lucien’s reaction to the situation is one of vulnerability and desperation. Perhaps, more than death itself, he’s even more afraid to be separated from her. Thus, upon returning to reality, his immediate instinct is to cling to her, preventing her from leaving. All while trying to conceal his vulnerability and condition from her by preventing her from turning on the light.

Lucien: …Just stay here quietly by my side like this. Lucien's tone remains gentle, but his hand firmly grasps mine without any explanation, rendering me unable to move. He looks deeply into my eyes as if seeing something through me. His deep gaze makes my heart tremble, and his tight grip on my hand feels as if he wants to imprison me here forever. I purse my lips and gaze into the depths of his dark eyes, confronting the obscurity and paranoia lurking within.

Remember when Lucien mentioned how some children develop a dependency on specific plush items during their growth process, finding a sense of security in them? This scene perfectly mirrors that concept. In addition to his fear of losing her, he also experiences a lack of security at that moment, seeking solace in her eyes. MC is that special existence for him, someone he has grown dependent on because he finds a sense of security in her; the way he holds and looks at her… almost akin to a devout believer seeking comfort from the divine.

His grasp on my palm feels burning hot, with a slight tremble that's barely perceptible, as if it's desperately restraining something about to burst out. I don't know why he's like this, but I know one thing— he wants me to stay by his side. So I take the initiative to open my arms and embrace him tightly. MC: Alright, I'll stay right here, not going anywhere. So... don't force yourself. I feel his body stiffen, before his arms around me tighten and embrace me harder, as if he wants to meld me into his body, causing a bit of pain.

Oh and don’t get me started about how he *still* tries to restrain himself from completely holding her :"" only allowing himself to seek even more comfort when she's the one who initiates the hug; when she chooses not to leave him ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ .

ALSO, the hug that feels as if he wants to meld her into his body :”” It's been so long since the PG used this description, which shows the DEPTH of his fear of separation; He just wants to meld her into his body so that there's no way they'll get separated.

The last glimmer of twilight fades away, and in the darkness, I hug him tightly for a long time. The breath by our ears and the heartbeat pressed against each other’s chest gradually sync in frequency, becoming our sole yet intimate form of communication. Feeling the breath of the person in my arms has gradually calmed down, I softly ask him. MC: Shall we go turn on the lights together? The person in my embrace remains silent. I hold his hand then gently and slowly stroke his back. MC: I want to see you, Lucien. There's a pause on his breath, and then a faint rustle of our rubbing clothes follows. I'm pulled into a tighter embrace and he moves a few steps. Immediately after, the lights switch on.

Not really analysis I just want to highlight this scene because, GOD this is so bittersweet and intimate ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ  the way they cling to each other in the dark, comforting each other and communicating only through their heartbeat and breath… how MC gently and softly coaxes him to reveal himself to her and he finally obliges, ugh, my kokoro just :"

Under the cold light of the laboratory, I notice the dark circles under Lucien's eyes, standing out prominently. I let him hold me as my fingertips slowly touched the proof of his fatigue. - Lucien closes his eyes and presses his face against my palm, his brows furrowing unconsciously. I pause, then gently massage his forehead. MC: Does your head hurt a lot? Lucien: It hurts. He doesn't open his eyes, but his brows relax slightly. His hoarse voice seeped into my ears, tinged with a hint of vulnerability. -

His tone becomes calm again, even indifferent as if the person suffering the torture is not himself. I embrace him distressfully, my eyes involuntarily becoming moist. After a long while, I hear his calm voice ringing beside my ear. Lucien: MC, it's from Evol's deterioration. -

Lucien is so adept at feigning normalcy and enduring; enduring pain, enduring collapse, enduring…… deterioration… Now, with even him unable to bear it, just how far has his deterioration progressed?

WHEN I HEARD THIS WORD “疼” (lit. painful) MY HEART JUST BROKE INTO PIECES༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ . It's just... how awful his condition must be if even Lucien (who's used to freaking pain, who can still laugh even after he slit his own eyes, or get his shoulder blasted) finds it unbearable?

As mentioned in R&S Threshold, Lucien's evol deterioration manifests as cancer. Judging from his symptoms such as headaches, anxiety, and depressive symptoms, it's likely that Lucien has a brain tumor resulting from his evol deterioration. Evol deterioration worsens exponentially due to the overuse of evol, and in the past few chapters, Lucien has repeatedly overused his evol to protect MC, again and again, resulting to his condition now :".

It's only when the lights come on that MC realizes what he's been enduring lately :". The unease that MC felt since the start of the chapter now has an answer. It turns out that Lucien has been spending a lot of time online recently due to the unbearable pain caused by his worsening condition:"". He ‘escapes’ to the game to avoid the pain yet also never gives up on his real life.

Although he needs coaxing, it's also the first time he shows his vulnerability; being clingy solely because he needs her there in that moment.

In a way, this is also proof of his growth. He has truly learned to share his burden with her, realizing that she does care and he no longer needs to bear everything alone. So, when he's not even sure if he'll survive this time, the least he can do is tell her some truth, perhaps easing her into preparing for the worst.

Lucien: For a long time, the drugs developed have shown limited effectiveness in clinical settings. Lucien: Yesterday, the final clinical trial of the last drug also concluded, and the result was a failure. - MC: ...Then why is it going smoothly? Lucien: Because this failure is the most special one. Lucien: The failure of clinical trials proves that both paths we've been pursuing so long are wrong, so we can only find another way. - Lucien: Mm, at that time, the main research direction was to find methods to delay or even reverse deterioration through gene editing and cell manipulation experiments.

More than Lucien facing his circumstances with indifference and sorrow, what I find more heart-wrenching is the very clear emphasis on the passage of time. The research into the deteriorating disease has been ongoing for an extended period, with Lucien's condition progressively deteriorating. Enduring failure after failure, he now embarks on a dangerous journey of researching gene rewriting and cell manipulation, the only path left to solve this deterioration. And...

[Name: Xu Yijian, Cause of Death: Explosion caused by laboratory sample leakage.] [Due to severe damage at the scene, there is currently no evidence of human factors, and it is deemed an accidental incident.]

Lastly, he tells the truth about his condition yet lies about how dangerous this path is. Does he not want MC to investigate his death and involve herself in danger in case the worst happens? ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

[The path moving forward]

As usual, the chapter posted right after the anniversary chapter tends to mark the beginning of the conflict or the introduction of a major challenge. So, it's safe to assume that we'll face an even more intense knife ahead (a.k.a the angst in this chapter is just beginning-) . Aside from Lucien's subplot of treating evol deterioration, I'm betting that this year's anniversary chapter will involve defeating the enigmatic Infinite or perhaps a hidden boss/evil within Odyssey. If you’ve read so far, thank you for reading this chapter and my rambles~

[some-pers0n]

Every once in a while I think about the ship I've been obsessed over for close to two years now and feel like I'm ascending to another plane of reality. Like sometimes you just encounter a ship that hits every single mark and is perfect in every regard and you're left stunned how something like that can even exist

[lotus-pear]

NEW BSD CHAPTER IN 8 HOURS how we feeling ma chérie???

(hope you’re doing well & sorry abt the wedding 😔 dw rest assured our engagement is still withstanding 💍)

wait what /gen