#annoyed me lmao. great points as always nick!!

[hickeygender]

ironically enough, some people claim he stole his idea for the fountain from elsa von freytag-loringhoven. in my eyes that theory has been completely disproven due to those letters both being taken out of context and willfully mistranslated. but the fact that it could have been a stolen idea? what would that mean for the piece? would that mean it's not art? would that undo the influence it had on the art world for more than a century? theft does not negate art.

i personally don't like ai art, but i don't think that it's ontologically evil, or that it isn't art, because i believe anything can be art. the theft of living artists' work by these sites does make me uncomfortable, just as if duchamp stole the urinal from either freytag-loringhoven or from a pub, that would make him a bit of a dick. he'd still be an artist, though.

it’s awesome that we’re doomed to hear the same reactionary opinion that art is only art if the artist puts work into it for the rest of time

[crossovereddie]

Thoughts on S11xE3

Me being a mom means now these recaps will be up at random times unlike when I used to be on a schedule. Let’s get right into it. Again I’m not a spoiler free blog. This post is one big ass spoiler.

Wtf was that intro

Great now my wifi connection is fucking up

I’m actually watching with my husband so if he says some dumb shit I’ll let y’all know

Debbie is hella annoying damn

Fred’s room is so calming

OH MY GOSH WTF

THAT WAS OUT OF NOWHERE

OH MY GOSH

AN EXPLICIT SEX SCENE?!

IS THIS REAL LIFE

WHAT

Okay I’m in shock I had to pause

“I mean....it’s kinda hot.” I HATE MY HUSBAND BYE

We started that scene over lmao

DIRTY CONVICT

HANDS AROUND HIS THROAT FUCK THATS WOW

A JONAS BROTHER PLS

JOE ALDNRSkdbd

“Joe was my fave too” seriously I hate my husband 😂😂😂

IM TOTALLY NICK

BITCH NICK JONAS WAS MY FIRST TRUE LOVE

MICKEY REALLY IS MY SON

“Jonas loving slut” that’s me

“I’m gonna get you pregnant” IMFUCKING SCREAMING

REALLY I SCREAMED

“If you scream again and wake Gid up before we finish this scene I swear to god we’re done” I HATE MY HUSBAND SOMEONE COME GET HIM

PRISON PORN

POWER BOTTOM

I WILL PASS OUT

COLOR IT ORANGE AND CALL IT IAN STFU

We had to pause and rewatch that scene a few times

“So would you fuck Mickey or ian if you could?” “Uh....i don’t know man. Maybe ian. He looks like an emotional lover and you know I’m vanilla” “he just had his hands around mickeys throat” “It looked soft....Do that later ” have I mentioned how much I hate my husband?

Okay wtf Debbie but I also laughed

“Why can’t little miss sunshine wear pants?” Thank you Carl

Did frank say “you are”??

“Well who sticks it in who” oh god

“Mines wider which is the only metric that matters” he’s not wrong

They’re fighting about who is prettier this is all I’ve ever wanted

I actually love them so much guys I’m so fond of both of them not just Mickey WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN

ugh tami

Hubs: “She’s hot....oh but we hate her” me: “yeah she’s hot but where’s my girlfriend”

I love how gallagher Mickey is in that scene 😭😭😭😭

Mickey Gallagher 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

No Liam don’t leave her lolololol

Kev would be a tp hoarder

VERSOCKY

Hub: “I want that tracksuit” “I will leave you”

WHERE IS MY GIRLFRIEND

I NEED MY GIRLFRIEND

I MISS HER PRETTY FACE

HE TOOK HER TO THE WRONG SCHOOL THATS SO FUNNY

WHY DID I LAUGH SO HARD

Frank tried

Ugh bye Carl

SHES CALLING HIM BILLIE IM DONE

WHERE THE FUCK IS SANDY

Aw Kermit and Tommy made up

Hi Mickey baby I love you

MICKEY WORKING OUT

“since I married a body shamer” BABY PLS

Mickey is so pretty wowowowowow

KEGGY BANK

I hate that these dumb jokes have me laughing

My Mickey is so smart

HE SAID SWOLE

Omg the flexing more like when I “flex” my baby’s arms and tell him he’s a strong boy after tummy time 😭😭😭😭😭

Now I’m thinking of Mickey as a tiny baby and I wanna cry

I told my husband this and he rolled his eyes 😭😭😭

DAMN YOU TELL HIM IAN’S COWORKER!!

Why are they so caught up on this

Oh no brad’s baby 🥺🥺🥺

Put your fucking mask on Tami it’s a hospital

Still waiting for Sandy

“Rain girl” another stupid joke that made me laugh

Franny is too cute

I really hate Carl’s storyline

SANDY

BABY

GOSH SHES SO HOT

HELP ME RELAX INSTEAD

FUCK SHES SO HOT

IM SO IN LOVE

“If you left me for her I’d understand” thanks hubs. If you left me for ian I’d understand too

Okay bye kev I need more sandy

I’m the #1 Sandy Milkovich stan

I wish we could’ve gotten more seasons with her 😭😭😭

Oh gosh kev

Who thought “hmm. Let’s make the crazy cop who abuses their power a black woman”???? This show is so fucking ridiculous most of the time

How ooc Mickey loves working out

Mickey with the Alibi crew is always my fave

Remember how supportive they were when he came out

I hate Tami :))))))))

Fuck

Sandy

Pls

Aunt Fiona :(

Is “fuck if I know” Mickey????

He better be in the family group chat

I FUCKING HATE CARLS STORYLINE

I just want ian to have a job he loves somewhere he’s respected

I’m proud of you ian

Mickey has the best arms

“Put some pants on you’re turning me on a little bit” MICKEY

Mickey is so fucking smart

My baby

You make me so proud

I love the way he says Jesus

“Man swole”

BABYFACE

BOUFANT

Me as V breaking up the fight

“Or they” I love franny :(

Fuck frank I need a franny and uncle mickey day

Oh no....

They’re really gonna do this to frank huh?

I’m actually sad

I honestly didn’t see this coming

I mean I kinda figured something was gonna happen to frank since it’s the last season but this isn’t what I was expecting

I’m just assuming at this point btw

Yes V pls parent them

YOU TELL THEM V

Pouty Mickey :(((((

Lip is the best person

I love this tattoo scene

Frank nooooo

Why am I getting emotional

So is hubs

Ugh sandy I love you

Debbie sucks man

“I’d divorce you but you never signed a prenup”

“Fuck you cop” MICKEY PLS

DEBBIE SUCKS

TELL HER LIP

Yikes

Maybe don’t tell her that

She is hella annoying though and doesn’t take any responsibility ever

FRANNY IS THE BEST 😭😭😭

MICKEY CALLED IAN DADDY

DADDY

OH MY GOD

Uber masculine slut

OH MY GOD!!!!!

NICK JONAS

THEYRE FUCKING TO A JONAS BROTHERS SONG

OH MY GOD

This episode man.....wow.....I don’t even know what to say. All Gallavich aside though I really am enjoying this season so far! Again sorry for the random posting time. My husband and I really missed watching the show together and this was our only free time. I cant wait to rewatch this episode later! I hope y’all enjoyed watching as much as we did!

[cherrymoonvol6]

hey i just finished watching julie and the phantoms so here’s a quick “““““review”““““ on it. lmao

this show is VERY disney channel esque. once you know that, it’s easy to enjoy it for what it is, but if that’s not your thing there’s not a lot to enjoy for you, sorry.

the fact that most of the high school kids look like actual teenagers really cement that last fact lol but i do appreciate that they got a bunch of kid actors to portray the characters. like, i just love looking at nick and realising he looks so much like fellow teenager streamer tubbo, that shit fuels my soul. in contrast though, the guys from sunset curve give me whiplash. luke is supposed to be 17, which i’m guessing is 1-2 years older than julie’s age in the show, but he just looks like he’s on his mid twenties and it never fails to take me out.

because of the amount of kid actors/disney channel vibes, the acting ranges from mediocre to good. the standouts for me were alex and willie. despite being the “sober” one of the three, alex’s delivery was on point and he got the most laughs from me for that exact reason. willie is quite standard most of the time: i think his first scenes with alex made him feel real to me, sort of charming but also a bit awkward and giddy. he stepped up his game on that scene where he finally tells the band what’s actually going on. for the first half of that scene, he came off to me as stressed, if not a bit embarrassed/guilty for the bad things that he caused. it was at that moment where alex pushed him and he says that he really cares about him, that the emotional impact of the scene really struck me. like, up to that point i didn’t see how much that stress actually came from the anxiety that willie felt from getting these people that he genuinely cares about under trouble. it completely shifted the scene from me and it’s like i felt the same whiplash that alex, luke and reggie did, and i was surprised that it landed so well for me. but yeah, anyways. er, all actors do a good job in the emotional scenes, which is just enough, so in general i’m pretty okay with the performances (excluding all the disney channel laugh track esque moments that didn’t land at all for me but, eh)

the pacing of the show was good for the most part: just when it feels like it becomes aimless, a new plot thread begins and gives the characters something to do. i also liked that the stakes were pretty high by the end of the season, despite not keeping the tension for long enough imo. although the show doesn’t waste that much time with dumb, inconsequential plotlines, the whole liar thing with flynn was extremely annoying despite being resolved quickly and rather lightly as well. it’s just, blegh, excuse for a new song and also filler for the episode. i think the show did a much better job with the subplot of julie’s brother finding out about the ghosts, since the scenes are always charming and don’t really put the plot on hold like flynn’s part did.

i also wish the show did something... interesting? with the archetypes of the disney channel characters it presents. i think the sharpay evans clone (CAN’T remember her name </3) had something going on for her when she said that it was unfair that julie was getting so much attention since she put all the effort into her project from the start, but her complaints seem so stupid when it’s revealed that her dad is the fourth member of sunset curve. like, she’s just some spoiled brat that has everything handed out to her, why is she mad? if she was in julie’s situation she’d find it even easier to get back in the music program or whatever it’s called, due to her daddy’s influences. why am i supposed to feel something for her when she claps for julie at the end of the show, out of the blue? she’s literally been an asshole in every other scene. likewise, nick simply doesn’t have a personality. he just humors julie from the start and makes it kinda like he’s always had a crush on her, and there’s like no scene in which he looks actually happy to be with his gf. why is he even dating her? why hasn’t he tried to be with julie all this time? he’s likeable yeah, but only because just as the audience he likes julie and wants to get closer to her, and doesn’t offer anything interesting - which is a shame because i do think him and julie have some chemistry. lastly, caleb is a textbook classic disney villain (flamboyant, evil to the core, queer coded, fucking gay and evil, did i already say flamboyant). surprisingly i’m of the opinion that he’s exactly what he needed to be lol. i like that the show gives him exactly the amount of screentime that he needs, and presents a big threat and a nice expansion to the ghostly part of the universe of this show. he’s also the best vocalist in the cast so all of his performances are a blast.

i also feel like they underused trevor’s character. idk, there could have been a lot more to him than just stare in amazement/fear whenever he sees the dead members of his former band singing with julie. i think julie’s dad filled the quota of sorta-incompetent adult just fine and we didn’t need him to be like That. it would’ve heightened the emotional impact of the death of these guys and maybe him apologizing for erasing sunset curve’s legacy could work as a nice character moment AND a red herring for their “unfinished business”, idk.

about the songs, i feel like the creators wanted an excuse to bring the 2000s pop-rock vibe back and i wholeheartedly support that decision. my favorite one is probably edge of great, but there’s not a song in the soundtrack i truly dislike. also for the love of god please give alex more solos </3 his voice is my favorite.

watching this show was a reminder of what i hate from first seasons/movies lol. i’m always afraid of the creators making it so these 10 episodes are only an introduction of themes and situations to be resolved and explored in other seasons. i feel like the biggest offender of this category is (netflix’s) ragnarok, and 3% is as usual the one who did it right. i’m conflicted as to where does jatp fall in this category. i wouldn’t exactly say that the focus of this show was on julie’s reintroduction to music after her mother’s death: like, she literally starts singing by the end of episode 1. the show clearly wants to follow up with caleb’s business, which is also the chance for the band to meet other ghosts who are in the same situation as willie. and the last scene where caleb possesses nick’s body shows like, how willing they are to go into that route lol. just the comparison of those stakes makes it..... blegh. i think at the end of the day it doesn’t really matter, right? i enjoyed this show for what it is and in terms of personal entertainment, i’d still give it an 8/10. good stuff. fun songs, cute characters. looks really good!

[characteroulette]

GAME KIDS TIME for Dante Going Fuckin Berserk for the first time (cuz you sent it to me years ago and it's still sitting in my inbox lmao)

ohhhh nice! hahaha. I actually rewrote the whole beginning of that one night because I had the thought of "no, this needs more build up." because it used to just start with the kids in the Game, hearing the singing and then Dante popped.

(I also need to rewrite it again now that the kids are more Aware of Dante's trauma with Hell hahaha)

(here is a read more because I have more to say than I thought I would)

Then Dante's fire sparked up, a hotter and bigger flame. [...] They blasted Frank, Abraham, and Vektor straight out of the game and they hit Petel as he dove into the cover. The burns and the heat around him didn't cease, the waves rocketing out past the visible horizon in every direction.

I did my best to convey Inferno here and I still like it hahaha. getting the same 'fire fire fire' thing that'd probably be going through Dante's head is an interesting challenge, since we're in Petel's pov, but it worked out pretty okay?

There, in the middle of a scorched circle on the ground, was Dante, crumpled on the floor in a familiar way. Though, the only thing recognisable as Dante was the soft, wavy blond hair and the knowledge that Dante had been at the centre and cause of this. Dante's clothes had been torn and were now grey and all available skin Petel could see had been scorched charcoal black.

hey I really like writing character descriptions whoop. also, fun fact! Dante's Berserk aftermath is based off an Elsen (from the game OFF)! that's why he head asplode, actually.

"Why can't he utilise this power into a more constructive gain for us?" Vektor lamented loudly. Knowing Vektor, he was probably also waving his hands about and nearly knocking himself over from the movements. "Every time he shows any kind of prowess in his abilities, it's to our detriment. Every time! He's a jeopardy to the mission."

"Your mission." Abraham's voice came across as cool, but as annoyed as Petel was growing. "He made a mistake, it happens."

I just really still like this exchange, honestly. Abraham being the one to throw that back in Vektor's face was supposed to show his growth, but honestly Abraham is just really friendly and patient towards Dante ;w;

Finally, Dante said, "Sorry."

Petel's response was immediate. "It's okay."

"I-I got scared. And then. I couldn't stop it."

Petel gave it a moment of thought. Back to when all he could comprehend was teeth and claws and making sure every living thing in his vicinity was torn to shreds. He shrugged in the end. "It happens."

even now, EVEN NOW, Dante's still not being truthful about things. he just lies about the root cause of his Berserk because, to him, it's all Fear and Trauma wrapped up in a neat little package (named Orpheus and Hell, but no one would know that since they haven't seen Orpheus yet) and so he just tries to use his Excuse here in a desperate attempt to keep the others out of the loop still. Dante man what the fuck are you doing

One of the Gargoyles dove suddenly, aiming for Dante. Petel managed to claw its wing enough to redirect it, but it still nicked Dante's exposed arm. Dante's mouth opened, a half-formed scream not quite making it out, before his head exploded in a spray of black liquid and a column of black smoke spilled out of his neck. Petel and the two Gargoyles hesitated. For once, Petel sincerely hoped it was just that Dante had been killed, had been logged out of the game. "Uh. Paige?"

"What the hell is going on?" Her voice came over with a stronger terrified tone than she probably meant. "Dante's stats just rocketed up by a 400-times multiplier and he's got 5% health left and the computer's refusing to tell me why it's going mad like this."

The creature formerly Dante straightened itself up, now taller and with broader shoulders. The claws had grown and whiffs of black smoke drifted off their sharp tips with every slight movement, while Dante's legs had curled backwards and the clawed feet had become stumps, nearly hoof-like. A constant stream of black smoke and spurting blood oozed from the stump of Dante's neck. Petel had nothing better to say than a succinct, "Dante's head came off."

At this, the rest of the crew spoke in unison with Paige. "What?"

head asplode! god I love this scene a lot hahaha. the Gargoyles hesitating, like Petel, is meant to be significant! but Petel can't really pay attention to that right now since their friend's head just exploded. I struggled, also, for a long time on how much exactly to jack up Dante's stats and then went "fuck it, 400x is broken" and settled on that hahaha

Petel desperately wished he could explain it better, but his words were caught in the back of his throat and he knew that if he tried to force them out, all that he'd manage would be whimpering and whines. Dante grabbed the remaining Gargoyle as it tried to escape and tore its wings off, then tossed it away as it dissolved into code. Then the thing turned towards Petel.

Petel had no other instinct. His tail tucked, ears flattened against his head, and he ran.

[...]

Of course, Dante was right there behind him. It didn't seem like Dante could fit in the checkpoint or even get inside, but it didn't stop for a second. It slashed at the checkpoint with those sharp claws, making the structure shake and fizzle and actually damaging the thing. After a few slashes, Dante then dragged its claws along the ground, tossing up some sludge-like lava that splattered against the openings of the checkpoint but was kept out by some invisible force. The walls continued to shake and Petel whimpered quietly. "Paige. Paige, please."

Petel showing real fear!! also very good. also very significant. Dante's coding is so fucked up that it actually breaks some of Petel's coding, too. that Fear is just so palpable that it leaks out and infects those around it. (and also Dante's Warping is just That Bad hahaha, this is why he does his best to be careful all the time)

Frank frowned, slowly tilting his head to the side. "It'd be faster to force the log out, right?"

"What exactly is this risk factor?"

Abraham seemed hesitant to ask and Paige hesitated on answering. That was enough for Petel to figure out the rest. And it wasn't good. "He'd come out without a head. Wouldn't he?"

Paige cringed. Frank and Abraham's jaws dropped open. And Vektor, in fabulous Vektor fashion, rolled his eyes. "There's only a fifteen-point-eight percent chance that the system will mistake Dante's current form for his form on this plane of existence. The odds are in our favour."

"No."

Petel narrowed his eyes at Vektor and Vektor wilted under his glare. Paige twiddled with her fingers. Frank came out of his shock first, giving a strangled cry of outrage. "You'd risk Dante coming back headless and dead just to get him out a little quicker?"

Vektor gulped, voice unsteady. "Technically, he wouldn't be dead. The system would just mistake his current form for your reality." Vektor looked around at them expectantly, but Petel wouldn't budge. Not on this one. [...] Vektor puffed up again, getting huffy. "Look, if we did lose Inferno, why would it matter that much? He's of no great contribution to our mission, anyway."

"Your mission!" Petel growled and surged forward to grab the front of Vektor's suit coat. "Dante. Is not. Useless."

ahh, Vektor. (there's that line again whoooo) I have to rewrite all of this but I always want to show the disconnect between how Vektor treats Dante, because of his built-in muscle memory. Vektor doesn't even understand it himself, but he tends to treat Dante worse than the others just because it's what feels right in his programming.

the rest of this chapter is a lot of me getting the rest of the kids out so Paige and Petel can discuss exactly how Dante's Berserk works hahaha. man, I need to rewrite this...

Dante would get out. Things would be all right. They'd all find this very funny in a week or so. 'Hey, remember that time you went berserk and got trapped in the game for several hours? Wasn't that just a hoot?' 'Not as much as that time you ripped us all to shreds when you went berserk! Ah, how time flies.' They were good enough friends by this point, right?

Petel please what the fuck is this XD

anyway, yeah! those are my thoughts on this chapter as it is in beta form hahaha. the ending is basically Petel reaching a conclusion about his feelings towards Dante and that's why he just thinks of them as dating in the next one (which is also something I need to rework, aaaaaaa) but also showing off the trio as friends!! even though this thing is a couple years old by this point, I still like it a lot!

(sorry to everyone else hahaha if you're really curious about the whole chapter, here's the google doc of it. please don't make a mess of it ;; )

[staliasjeronica]

Riverdale S5 Ep9 Thoughts

It’s been awhile since I’ve watched Riverdale, I’m getting bored with them going back to Varchie out of literal nowhere and I’m assuming BH will soon follow because they don’t know how to write anything else even though that’s all the show needs to be good. Look how great the show was when they were finally starting to give us Barchie…. anyways thoughts under the cut so this post doesn’t clog up the tag. Also: MANIFESTING JERONICA AND BARCHIE BYE

- Honestly a lot of people are weirded out/annoyed by the alien plot but I love aliens so I’m lowkey okay with it.

- Alice this is Riverdale you really think some bad coincidence couldn’t have happened right after Polly left the phone booth?

- Veronica stop using money for no reason PLEASE. And god more VA scenes I’m so tired of it… though somehow it fits better than them being together as teens. But we’re not forgetting how he cheated on her with Betty, still loves Betty, and is mostly just going back to Veronica because it’s “comfortable”

- TABITHA AND VERONICA SCENE!! They look so good standing near one another ugh

- … if I heard the football coach say that over the intercom I’d literally think he’s a whiny piece of shit and never go to the games in spite. What the fuck was that???

- Jughead acting like he probably wouldn’t have written a story like that kid when he was in school lol okay...

- Reggie pointing at each bulldog and calling them a loser on his way out…. what the actual fuck asdfgjkl;

- Give Veronica literally anything than plots surrounding Archie and Hiram we’re so fucking TIRED

- Veronica needs Archie to talk to Reggie about this boring football bs but will make a wager with her dad that will go against everything Archie would like… please nothing about them as a couple has changed!!! IT’S SO BAD AND BORING!!!! WE DON’T WANT THEM!!!

- We really could have had teachers!Barchie and Jeronica but noooo they’d rather cater to toxic bh and va who don’t deserve to have their boring ships that ruin their characters. Why did Riverdale get stuck with the people who can’t write to save their lives?

- Cheryl and Betty finally having an actually good conversation wow-

- VA once again in bed sigh. The only thing getting me through is that Archie seems much happier with Betty muah

- Veronica stop being cute I’m trying to hate you and Archie getting back together out of nowhere

- Betty please for once in your life stop lying… I know you’re trying to protect her but if Polly really is dead it’s gonna hurt even worse now that you gave her hope

- LERMAN LOGAN AAFJDSHKHFJDFASHJKN THAT’S HIS FUCKING NAME? BRUH-

- “The story could have alluded to stuff happening at home.” “Then you should have come to us!” yes because parents who were abusing their child totally wouldn’t say anything to throw off the teacher who’s just trying to make sure their student is okay…….. why would he go to the parents first?

- #Kangs Cheryl shh we already don’t like them together please stop… anyways Swangs and Keggie when???

- Fangs really dated Kevin for 7 years, weirded out with his bf going into the woods to hook up with strangers and only now is talking about it… and they thought they’d be able to marry and have a baby together??? damn anyways SWANGS AND KEGGIE WHEN????

- But also Fangs is so right that’s why Kevin’s angry

- Adult friends BH is literally so much better than teenage co dependent toxic wannabe detectives but also if this makes them get together, also out of nowhere, I will rip out my hair

- what kind of nick name is T-Dub………… but anyways this scene was so cute

- See adult BH and VA could have been so good if they kept romance out of it since they already milked the shit out of it for four seasons (at least three too long), because them as adults, as FRIENDS feels so good to watch.

- HIRAM BENCHES REGGIE BC HE DOESN’T WANT TO LITERALLY BREAK A CHILD’S LEGS?!?!??!? This is how we get Reggie back to the “good side” and not Beggie sighhhhhhh imagine if we had good writers

- Betty’s like “…… the mothmen……. god I literally grew up to be a real detective what is this bullshit?"

- Also instead of mothmen why not just make it all about aliens by themselves

- This proves that BH is STILL not compatible after five seasons muah I guess I can deal with boring VA as long as the worst of the worst, BH, is gonna stay dead. At least VA is hot

- That edited picture of Betty and Polly I— afsdfhfasf

- Polly deserved so much better… anyways go read my Sweet Pea x Polly drabble!!! based after the time jump :)

- Kevin please if you’re gonna painfully flirt please learn a few actually good pick up lines

- Ummmm okay first of all why did that guy not say anything about Kevin calling him hot if he was straight and not into him hitting on him? Second of all, why does Kevin always get these awful plots, and lastly, what the fuck anyways can’t wait for Fangs to find out and sick the serpents on that Shane guy bc while him and Kevin aren’t together anymore, he definitely still cares about him

- Betty once again resorting to assault……. okay…… what a gross misuse of power

- Kevin feeling ashamed of him being gay because his mom once talked about him wearing husky clothes…? God everyone on this show deserves much better plots what the fuck

- Can’t wait for Betty to be suspended for this bullshit

- I don’t think the Logan’s would like Jughead of all people helping find their son but okay

- Betty is so unstable please how did she become a detective… ahhh right the writers eat from her ass lmao

- Love that Reggie gets no shit for just suddenly switching sides

- also sigh pairing up bh and va for the millionth time. It’s interesting that everyone enjoys the show much better when literally anyone else interact

- more singing…………Cheryl you’re not in high school anymore BUT it is lowkey a bop somehow though

- I know the answer is no but V never told Archie of her dumbass wager huh

- 0 to 52………………. so how is Hiram not gonna win this. We find out he cheated in some way and is disqualified or something?

- VERONICA, REGGIE, AND TABITHA HUGGING AHHH NEW OT3 FUCKKK

- Why is Hiram so mad his team has 52 points I—

- That kiss was so boring please give us Barchie and Jeronica and stop having V go back too Archie

- THEY LEFT RIVERDALE THAT QUICKLY? damn okay

- Betty feeling bad just because her mom found out she lied… like okay I know we’re supposed to want Betty on the case but she really shouldn’t be. She’s such an awful detective. She had potential in the beginning but :/

- anyways thank fucking god it’s over that felt like a million years long of boring bullshit where is Barchie and Beggie and Jeronica and Keggie and Karchie and Swangs ugh make Riverdale interesting again PLEASE I’ve never stopped watching like this, ever…

[returnn-of-the-mac]

How would the companions, including DLC characters, (+ Maxson, Cade, Haylen, Rhys, Sturges, Desdemona, Glory, Father, and Synth!Shaun) react to Sole acting high off their tits? And then they find out it’s because Sole is part feline and has been rolling in catnip? Bonus point points if laser pointer-related shenanigans follow said discovery.

Nick broke the 4th wall so much in this lmao sorry. Also only a handful of the companions (the ones I thought would actually do this) taunt Sole with the laser. Please enjoy!

FO4 Companions (+Many Others) React: Sole Being Part Cat

*[Companion] walks in to Sole rolling around in kitty litter*

…

Curie: [intrigued] Zo Ztrange. Zis ees deeztinctly feline behavior.

Codsworth: [Sir/Mum]! Pick yourself up and out of that filthy catnip! It’s probably festering with bacteria.

Piper: [slightly embarrassed] Havin fun, Blue?

Gage: [embarrassed] C’mon boss, stop it [harshly whispering] You’re makin us look bad.

Nick: I should be surprised, but I’ve already reacted to you doing much more absurd things.

Longfellow: You, uh…you good kid? Drink a little too much?

Strong: Why human act funny? Look like flipped over Radroach!

Ada: [Sir/Ma’am]. You are acting strange. Is there any way I can assist you?

MacCready: [looking away; embarrassed] Yeah. Rolling around in catnip. Totally normal behavior.

Cait: [annoyed] Oh c’mon now! Cut the crap! Yer embarrassin yerself!

Hancock: [amused; chuckling] The hell did you take? Give me somma that shit.

Preston: General, you look unwell and you’re acting strange. You need to see a doctor.

Sturges: [amused] Glad to see you’re takin a break and having some fun!

Deacon: [playfully] Hey! Don’t have all the fun!

Tom: [amused] Mind if I join ya!?

Desdemona: That’s quite…disgusting.

Glory: [amused] Yuck! You do you, but I’m not partaking.

Danse: [harshly whispering] Stop it, soldier. You’re violating our code of conduct…and you’re making a fool of yourself.

Haylen: [concerned] Hey, uh, are—are you okay there?

Rhys: The fuck is wrong with you? I knew you were an idiot.

Maxson: What has gotten into you Knight? This behavior is inappropriate.

Cade: Hm. This behavior is certainly abnormal. I would like to conduct some medical testing on you, Knight.

X6-88: Is there a reason for this behavior, [sir/ma’am]?

Father: [disgusted] What do you think you’re doing?

Shaun: [scared] [M-mom/D-Dad]? Are you okay?

…

After some medical tests, it turns out that Sole was part feline.

Curie: Well zen! Zat zertainly explain’s zeir peculiar antics!

Codsworth: I beg your pardon!? But…how? Did Vault Tec have something to do with this?

Piper: A cat, huh? [devious grin; pulls out laser] Ohh Blueee~

Gage: No way! What!? [laughing, reveals laser] I carry this around for Mason but this. This‘ll be fuckin hilarious.

Nick: Even with this twist, I’ve still reacted to stranger.

Longfellow: A cat you say? [removes laser pointer]

Strong: Part cat? [suddenly scared] Human scratch Strong!?

Ada: Interesting. My databases don’t indicate any previous accounts of homosapien-feline hybrids. You must be one-of-a-kind, [sir/ma’am].

MacCready: [genuinely amused, but pretending not to be] You can’t be serious. [takes out laser and stares at it]…always wanted to try this though.

Cait: [unconvinced] Yeah, yeah. An’ I’m part bloodbug.

Hanocck: No kiddin, huh? Well. Cat’s are chill.

Preston: One of the best Generals in Minuteman history is part cat. That’s impressive.

Sturges: [Roars with laughter]

Deacon: [excited]You can’t make this shit up! [takes out laser pointer]

Tom: Nah! For real!? Ha, that’s great [takes out laser] And so is this baby.

Desdemona: What’s next? Deacon’s a molerat…don’t answer that.

Glory: I’ve heard my share of crazy stories, but this is something else.

Danse: [completely baffled] I…I don’t know what to say.

Haylen: [playfully pets Sole’s hair and giggles]

Rhys: And just when I thought you couldn’t get any more despicable. [Takes out laser pointer]

Maxson: [on the verge of a breakdown] One of my best Knights…is…a cat.

Cade: Better a cat than a malfunctioning synth!

X6-88: [skeptical] I somehow don’t believe that [takes out laser] I’m going to need solid evidence.

Father: Stop with this nonsense!

Shaun: [Mom/Dad] is a cat? Can…can I keep it?

…

While some of the companions took this new information and rolled with it, others decided to have some fun.

…

Piper: [giggling] Look, Blue? What’s that? What’s that? [moves laser in opposite direction] Where’d it go!?

Longfellow: [slightly intoxicated] [aims laser off dock and into ocean]

Gage: [moves laser in circles and watches Sole run around] Heh heh. Go get it, boss!

MacCready: [moves laser back and forth; chuckling]

Hancock: [amused; lazily moves laser back and forth] Heh. This is pretty damn entertaining.

Deacon: [laughing and moving laser in circles] ooooOOH! [moves laser up wall] OOOooooh! [moves laser down wall]

Tom: Heh ha! Go get it, kitty! [moves laser in zigzag patterns]

Rhys: [points laser off the edge of Cambridge Police Station roof] [Sole hisses and claws the shit out of him]

X6-88: [Moves laser in a perfectly straight line back and forth] Cat confirmed.

[photolover82]

The Masked Singer Season 5 Episode 10: Quarterfinals! ft the “fiesty five” (Commentary & Guesses... well me reiterating the same guesses but adding a new one yay!)

Hello my fellow Masked Singer fanatics! Welcome or welcome back to Ana’s Masked Singer recap, where I, Ana, recap every episode of The Masked Singer excluding those weird sing-a-longs and Road to Finals. If someone goes home and they all sing new songs, then you will most likely see me recap it! And that’s exactly what happened this time... quarterfinals baby! We are almost at the end, only 2 more weeks to go wow! 5 contestants remaining, so let’s start with our 5th place contestant, shall we?

So the person (or should I say people) coming in 5th place and getting eliminated this episode is...

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

The Russian Dolls 🪆🪆🪆(yes, there are 3 of them)

Commentary: This one really surprised me honestly, I didn’t see this coming. Their performance of I’m Still Standing by Elton John was one of my favorite ones they have done honestly. I really enjoyed it, and even one of them was playing the freaking piano! Like it was super impressive and as always their harmonies are on point and insanely perfect.... that’s the only way I can explain it: perfect. Their voices work together perfectly, it’s like they’re a band of brothers or something (😉😉).

Anyways, they were revealed to be...

*DRUMROLL AGAIN*

Hanson (Wooo!)

Woohoo! Another one bites the dust, I got it correct yay.. 9/10 right so far. This is a new record for me, I usually get 2 wrong in the beginning reveals of previous seasons, so I am kinda proud of this so far yay! However, the reveal itself surprised me, I thought that they would make it at least to the semifinals if not the finale so this elimination I didn’t see coming. Especially after that performance which I think is one of their best. However, I was super nervous that they were gonna send Black Swan home so I was relieved by this ngl...

Anyways, having said that, let’s talk about the remaining 4 semifinalists:

1. Piglet 🐷

Commentary: Ok, so of all the performances this episode, his was the most surprising... because he started off sing OPERA. Honestly, I would have never thought Nick Lachey can sing in Italian and have that strong Operatic voice... the more you know man. However, he actually continued by singing Supertitous by Stevie Wonder which was a bit of a let down.. as I have said multiple times, his best is with ballads and his voice isn’t suited for upbeat songs like this one. In this case, he started at an all time high 📈 and it got me hyped but then it kind of died down 📉 by the middle and end. I did enjoy the performance tho but I wish he would have just sang opera the entire time because it left me wanting to hear more of the opera song.

2. Chameleon 🦎

Commentary: again I say, I am so sorry to people who are rap fans and/or fans of the chameleon/Wiz Khalifa, but I honestly feel like he should have gone home instead of the dolls. His performance of “Drop it like it’s not” by Snoop Dogg was not his best one, and his rapping is getting kinda repetitive at this point,even tho he is very good at it. Also, side note, the judges had the audacity to say that they thought this was Snoop even tho he sang a song by the guy and in the song he legit spelled “S-n-double o-p D-o-double g....” like um if it were Snoop, he wouldn’t be THAT obvious. Anyways, yeah I predict he is next to go.

3. Yeti ❄️☃️

Commentary: Alright, so Yeti is really surprising me honestly, quickly becoming my second favorite after my girl Black Swan. He is such a versatile performer, I never would have expected Omarion to rap, dance, roller skate, do R&B songs, and now sing some country. It made me nervous at first when he said country in the clue package, because I know him as a R&B musician, but I was really pleasantly surprised with his performance of Bless the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts, it was really smooth and unexpectedly great!

4. Black Swan 🖤🦢

Commentary: Speaking of my girl, here she is... omg I love her, please win girl, I beg of you! Her performance of Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran was.... um... interesting.... in the song choice department. It was absolutely not her best performance, but I gotta give her credit that she did make the song her own. However, she has so much range in her voice and she absolutely didn’t showcase it with this song. I really want Jojo in the semifinals to step it up and choose songs that I know she can absolutely crush like songs by female R&B and Soul singers (some of these do mix these genres with pop but u get me) that are still mainstream enough that people know them (i.e. Aretha Franklin, Destiny’s Child/Beyoncé, Jennifer Hudson, etc.).... even like them pop girlies who have like crazy ranges, y’all know who I am talking about: Mariah Carey, Ariana Grande, Celine Dion, Tori Kelly, etc. Please girl give me something with more oomph and that will give me goosebumps, because she can do that stuff but I feel like she is holding back. It’s gonna be the semifinals, I really hope she doesn’t hold back!

Bonus Jonas: Clueluedoo aka the freaking clue chicken...let’s talk about who I think he is (since he will be revealed next week!) 🐓

Commentary: ok like please Masked Singer I beg of you, never give me this character again, who doesn’t even sing but interrupts people with clues or something idk... I didn’t like this concept, it was strange, sometimes he was MIA and sometimes he got annoying... so I really hope next season they don’t bring this back. But at the same time, I kinda understand why they did do it this time based on who I feel like it is

I think he is...

Donnie Wahlberg (aka Jenny’s husband)

Reasoning: ok, you might know him from New Kidz on the Block or because his family is very famous... but he is married to one of the judges, Jenny McCarthy, and I feel like that’s why Masked Singer decided to take the “he doesn’t sing nor get any clues on the show til the end” route but still give him this weird clue route... I get it, I didn’t like it, but I understand it. Anyways, here’s why I think so (only clues imma provide for y’all)

He has never been on the show, as a contestant nor judge= this was on the Masked Singer podcast, and this is true, which rules out another popular guess, Joel McHale

He has a connection with one of the contestants= that would be Nick Lachey, they toured together (New Kidz on the block and 98 degrees did)

He pointed out Ken and Jenny specifically= he’s married to Jenny duh... and Ken is a family friend of theirs, they have dinner at each other’s houses a lot

He’s known in the kitchen (also from the podcast)= yup, he is known for his burgers (Wahlburgers)

Also, in the preview, Jenny is seen freaking out and falling on the floor, probably because that’s her husband and she prob guessed him incorrect but I didn’t so lol am I married to him? No... how did I get it then lmao 😂

Anyways, yeah that’s it! I hope you guys enjoyed it! See you this weekend hopefully for the semifinals recap! Let me know any thoughts about the chicken in the comments.... Like, comment, follow, do all the social media things, it really helps me out and makes me happy 😃. Bye guys!

[jlf23tumble]

This one’s for @homosociallyyours and @silverfoxlouis, the former because she’s not going to listen and the latter because they’re listening as we speak! I saw a post earlier that low-key annoyed me because it either misrepresented today’s Stern interview or it skipped right over the fascinating bits, so here are the parts I enjoyed (I won’t waste my time on the shit I hated, lol):

Shrooms and the song-writing process are related to Harry’s anxiety about fucking shit up and needing to get out of his own head; related: coming from a band, if there's something you don't like, you can tell yourself that it wasn’t your choice.

The Rob Stringer talk made me SIDE EYE w/r/t the delay, like, okay, you’re a label boss who’s gonna drop a ton of money, but you’re cool with telling the artist to just relax and take all the time they need, you’ll just pick up the thread when hs2 is completely finished, lolz (I have my own theories about allllll of that, but okay!).

I love Stevie and her coven of nocturnal witches, too, but tell me more about how she hated Harry’s choice of first single (in my heart, she wanted “Golden”) and the song that she thought should have been on the album but isn’t, god, she’s such a yoda, and this entire bit was so much bigger than the coven.

I live in Harry’s soft, breathy “thank you” whenever Howard praises SOTT.

I feel like all the White Eskimo talk is a fic waiting to happen, the whole battle of the bands and them winning studio time and how Harry talks to maybe one of them and there’s a guy who IS STILL IN WHITE ESKIMO I GUESS???? WHAT?

Howard Stern hatesssssssssssss Simon Cowell, so his attempts to get Harry to talk shit were both wonderful and expertly dodged, lmao. 

My only positive comment about the discussion around Harry “putting on some timber” during his bakery (cashier at a baker) years was how much it echoed Louis’s comment about “having extra timber” during one of his recent BTS specials.

Were the guys in One Direction REALLY saying that Matt Cardle was “so fucking good” back in the day? This junior statesman!

Ralph pointed this out when we were talking about the interview, but a lot of the time, Howard just makes statements (as per usual), and Harry says, “Right,” which is a great response because it isn’t really an answer, yet it’s still participatory.

Howard is obsessed with coronavirus, so it was hella interesting to hear Harry’s thoughts about it affecting his tour, when his tour is still so far away (yet another tour is so much closer and in the direct line of fire).

Howard (like me) was pleased that Harry’s band is a mix of women and men and not just dudes (I should take a drink every time Bowie is mentioned, like around Harry’s clothes, how Harry is starting his tour in Philadelphia, the entirety of that convo making me want to see Harry’s face as much as all the xarries want to).

One of the things I hated seeing earlier today was this notion that Howard “forced” Harry to talk about the robbery because he absolutely did not, Harry went into CRAZY levels of detail about it when Howard asked, “When did this happen to you?” (and the way Harry talked about it wasn’t full of trauma or sadness, it bordered on humorous in spots but still serious; it clearly shook him up, but he wasn’t about to let it change his life of feeling free to walk around at night). 

I wanted to hear a lot more about all the musicians hanging out in the ‘70s and being competitive in terms of who was writing the best songs about a particular party vs. the competitiveness of banging out the best single today. Harry’s focus was that if you say you like a song, people think you should collaborate…if two musicians hang out, they're dating or recording (like with Adele, and case in point, Howard immediately asked if they were working on something).

I also loved the bit about acting and how nervous Harry used to be about EVERYTHING because he’s waiting three hours to do three minutes, and he focuses so much on his voice or hands shaking, but this last SNL really helped (in my heart, his “little tweaks” were on the Sara Lee sketch).

I live in the guffaw from Harry whenever Howard unexpectedly hit his funny bone (like Harry saying Anne gave him some money to buy clothes when he first moved to London, and Howard saying it was good return on investment for her, what with the house Harry eventually bought her, etc.).

I absolutely LOVED the entire bit about Ben Winston’s attic (and Ralph’s related takes on it), the fine line of the plausibility yet the doubling down; the word “cocaine” coming out of Harry’s mouth; the parts about dating and keeping your relationship normal/secret, etc., GOLD, ALL OF IT. 

Harry, like Phoenix Mendoza, writes every day, which is part of why he wasn’t really into giving up his phone to muggers because that’s his writing zone of choice for lyrics and poems (the whole robbery clapback here: “for the purposes of not getting mugged again, no, they’re on a different device”).

MITCH SPEAKS!! He was into his Nick Drake phase when Harry met him, but apparently everyone is into the open D (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) chord, so he was a shoe-in. Also, Harry met Adam in 2010??? I’d like more information.

We move back into 1D territory with Zayn’s departure, which is still shittily handled but somewhat more maturedly discussed, and yet another attempt to get Harry to talk shit about Simon, which is getting us closer to what we want/need (Harry’s very real answer to Simon being pissed that Harry didn’t consult him about going solo: “I’m in a band since I was 16, there were five of us, we had a lot of managers, lots of people at the label, and all of these decisions affect your life in a massive way, every decision I made was a group call. I didn't know who I was as an adult,” and a lot of that is paraphrased in spite of the quote marks, but just know that I am screaming LIAM).

There’s a lot of weird downspeak to Sarah and Ny (Adam and Mitch were talked at earlier), but everyone’s very much into Sarah, and rightfully so. I loved the slip up where Howard is trying to figure out if there’s anything romantic going on between Harry and the female band members, and someone says, “Mitch!” so you can hear Howard process Harry and Mitch for a hot sec, cracking the Hitch dream, before we get clarification and Harry gleefully taking us into the story of their love. (Me as the speech Howard gives Sarah and Mitch about how dangerous it is to be in a band together and to have a relationship because if you fuck it up, it’ll be terrible.)

SLEDGEHAMMER NICE.

We get a bit into the “Adore You” video because Howard’s an animal softie, and he loves it (it’s downplayed, but Howard also mentions how fans have put a lot of “thoughts” into the fish), but then we get into talk about how this song is about the girl Harry’s banging (HIS SNICKER HERE) and how the common denominator in all of Harry’s failed relationships is him, huh. All of this relationship talk here makes me want to DIE with how much I love it.

Everyone focuses on the gross talk from Howard about Harry having a lady therapist (this is a long-standing Howard trope), but some good shit disappears between those cracks, like how Harry decided to go into therapy, how he’s keeping his LA therapist instead of having two in different countries, etc., and it’s actually Robin who asks Harry about seeming weak or vulnerable in front of a female therapist, but clearly, he’s not bothered.

I’m so interested in how the shrooms tongue-biting incident cured a speech impediment I wasn’t fully aware of but that is still so impossibly endearing.

Harry himself picks out his opening acts, which we already knew but is always nice to hear confirmed. 

The drug convo in text from earlier today makes it sound like he doesn’t smoke cigs, but to me, it seems like he doesn’t like to smoke weed (an edible king, relatable).

Harry says, “you’ve said it all,” which just makes me think he’s a long-time (or recent) Stern listener, because that’s what Howard says when he’s done/interview’s over.

We think it’s all done but the shouting, and then Robin gets into Harry’s clothing, which is where it gets dicey. Howard (of course) mentions that Bowie wore a skirt and how he himself did full drag on TV (“legs shaved and everything, you should see how gorgeous I am as a woman”), but Harry keeps it very much in the realm of what he wears is what he wears because it’s fun for him, he’s not wearing a school uniform or trying to look cool for his friends, he’s a lot more comfortable with himself: “At shows, I tell people to be who they want to be, I plan on telling my kids that, so I don’t want to be a hypocrite, I’m not wearing it for shock value.” 

Howard says people will assume he’s gay or bi (like Bowie, YEAH, SIGH), but Harry says it’s not performative. This whole bit is fascinating on so many levels, he touches (without saying) on the entire queer-baiting issue, and it’s cringe-y, with Howard saying “I’m not criticizing, wear what you want, I’m a big mess, etc.”

Anyway, they pivot out of that with Howard moving beyond into asking Harry who he wants to badmouth: “Simon?” Harry: “This has been great!” and this entire bit about how Howard wants to know if Harry considers Simon a friend, and Harry saying he doesn’t talk to him gives me life. There’s a lot of gross talk about who Harry has his eye on for his next girlfriend, but I will tell you that I never in my life expected to hear the words SUSAN BOYLE thrown into this convo. 

The interview closes out with Harry getting progressively more silent about the women he should date, saying that he doesn’t talk in interviews about his love life, he talks in music (oh?????), so Taylor Swift comes up, and Harry says it’s flattering to think you’re in a Taylor song because she’s such a great songwriter, which, true, I guess?

Harry hasn’t used a dating app (duh), but Howard thinks he should create one, and…scene. 

[fmstevie]

              *    ╰              waddup   y’all   ruby’s   back   2   annoy   u   all   w   a   lil   british   fuckboi   action   .   here’s   stevie   ,   inspired   by   matty   healy   n   thinkin   she’s   a   god   among   men   .   i   don’t   recommend   u   read   on   but   in   case   u   do   i   pray   u   forgive   me   enough   2   want   plots   w   that   like   button   .   🤡

                new   york’s   very   own      𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐄   ‘   𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘   ’   𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄            was   spotted   on   broadway   street   in   doc   marten   smooth   leather   chelsea   boots      .   your   resemblance   to   diana   silvers   is   unreal   .   according   to   tmz   ,   you   just   had   your   twenty   -   second      birthday   bash   .   while   living   in   nyc   ,   you’ve   been   labeled   as   being         𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐬   ,   but   also   𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞   .   i   guess   being   a   cancer      explains   that   .   3   things   that   would   paint   a   better   picture   of   you   would   be      erudite   inclinations   informed   by   a   god   complex   ,      melodrama   as   your   magnum   opus   ,   &   the   world’s   most   secretive   love   life         .               (   i   had   a   secret   marriage   that   lasted   6   months   but   ended   due   to   my   fear   of   my   family’s   mafia   ties   getting   in   the   way   .         )      &      (   cis   female   &   she   /   her      )

𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆      :      stephanie   charlotte   greystone 𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒔      :            primarily   stevie   ,   although   her   stage   name   is   ‘   grey   ‘   which   has   caught   on   as   a   go-to   nickname   .   takes   little   to   nothing   else   wilingly 𝒂𝒈𝒆      :            twenty   -   two 𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄      :      cancer    𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏      :      professional   musician   with   a   voiceclaim   of   lorde   ,   on   temporary   hiatus   to   write   grey3   .   casual   photographer 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓      𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚      /      𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔      :      cis      female      /      she      her      hers 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏      :      pansexual   w   strong   female   pref   but   tbh   if   u   can   handle   her   energy   she’ll   b   down   WKERWJER 𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕      :      5’10  🤤 𝒍𝒂𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒔      :      the   hedonist   ,         the      aesthete      ,      the      opaque   ,      the      vainglorious      ,      the      prodigy      ,      the      intangible   concept       𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒈      𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒔      :      rhiannon      -      fleetwood   mac      /      WHAT   U   CALL   THAT      -      chase   atlantic    /      iceberg      -      borns      /      UGH      -         the      1975     /      boss   bitch      -      doja   cat      /      elephant      -      tame   impala     /      black   hole   sun      -      soundgarden      /      black   madonna      -      cage   the   elephant      /         this   charming   man      -      the   smiths     /      swim      -      chase   atlantic      /      1999   WILDFIRE         -      brockhampton

tw      drug   mention

𝒊.  𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.

there   is   perhaps   no   more   a   formidable   surname   in   the   organized   crime   circuit   in   all   of   europe   than   greystone   ,   a   name   risen   to   fame   through   countless   court   cases   and   highly   publicized   trials   .   dubbed   ‘   el   chapo   of   the   old   world   ,   ‘   liam   greystone   makes   his   reputation   known   as   a   ruthless   and   conniving   leader   of   a   million   dollar   cartel   business   ,   distributing   to   most   of   the   UK   and   eastern   europe   .   it’s   perhaps   an   even   greater   shock   to   find   even   as   public   enemy   #1   ,   he   takes   a   welsh   wife   by   the   name   of   marissa   and   weds   her   in   a   lavish   and   very   public   ceremony   ,   surmounting   crowds   not   unlike   those   of   the   royal   weddings   .   such   a   decision   is   a   clear   power   move   on   his   part   ,   flexing   the   pure   influence   it   would   require   to   have   such   a   public   family   life   with   no   fear   of   repercussion   from   rivals   or   enemies   .   

it’s   several   months   following   their   wedding   that   james   is   born   ,   with   nicholas   taking   a   few   years   after   .   elite   prep   schools   in   the   most   posh   london   neighborhoods   were   abuzz   with   equal   parts   curiosity   and   concern   to   be   sharing   streets   with   the   most   feared   mafia   family   in   their   whole   country   ,   though   the   elite   nature   of   liam’s   new   societal   presence   meant   he   took   to   his   ‘   dealings   ‘   with   a   but   more   subtlety   than   before   his   rise   to   power   .   something   of   a   media   frenzy   ,   it’s   the   talk   of   the   town   when   marissa   falls   pregnant   another   time   ,   nearly   a   decade   after   nicholas’s   birth   ,   this   time   with   a   baby   girl   ,   something   that’s   all   the   sun   and   mirror   can   seem   to   post   about   in   their   celebrity   tabloids   section   for   weeks   on   end   .   her   birth   raises   questions   of   immense   speculation   :   what   will   the   world   do   with   a   greystone   girl   ?

as   it   would   result   ,   they’d   worship   her   .   stevie   found   herself   raised   in   a   world   that   sought   her   out   at   every   turn   ,   cameras   pointed   towards   her   at   every   outing   .   james   and   nick   ,   now   teens   by   the   time   she   enters   primary   and   just   as   big   of   terrors   as   their   father   ,   view   their   lavish   lifestyle   as   the   result   of   some   bigger   destiny   for   greatness   ,   as   their   father   had   always   fed   to   them   ,   something   they   passed   on   to   their   baby   sister   who   took   it   as   her   mantra   .   one   of   the   earliest   manifestations   of   a   rather   intense   personality   ,   stevie   takes   this   to   an   extreme   ,   turning   her   unwanted   stardom   into   a   fuel   for   an   ever-increasing   god   complex   to   develop   .   the   apple   of   her   father’s   eye   and   every   bit   as   quick   ,   her   instructors   note   a   dedication   to   perfection   and   an   obsession   with   accomplishment   ,   along   with   a   natural   intelligence   that   leads   her   to   blast   through   her   studies   with   relative   ease   .   

she’s   just   16   when   she   completes   her   schooling   and   already   has   a   reputation   that   will   precede   her   ,   just   as   her   surname   had   before   .   relaxed   and   observant   ,   her   voice   never   peaks   higher   than   a   low   alto   with   her   charming   londoner   drawl   ,   a   facade   never   cracking   from   her   knowing   poker   face   .   there’s   something   about   being   so   above   everyone   (   even   if   it   is   a   self-imposed   superiority   )   that   leads   stevie   all   but   to   the   brink   of   isolation   ,   finding   solace   only   in   the   words   of   a   self-deluded   father   and   her   own   scribings   in   a   leather   bound   notebook   .   piano   lessons   since   early   childhood   lend   themselves   to   melodies   following   melodies   ,   and   before   she’s   even   able   to   legally   drink   ,   she’s   released   her   first   album   under   the   moniker   ‘   grey   ’   titling   it   pure   heroine   as   a   cheeky   nod   to   the   inevitable   accusations   of   it   being   her   family   ties   that   got   her   a   record   deal   .   but   as   streams   of   the   melancholy   tunes   begin   to   pick   up   fans   worldwide   ,   the   album’s   themes   of   isolation   ,   abandonment   ,   and   wasted   youth   hit   harder   than   ever   anticipated   from   the   youngest   greystone   .   she   leaves   home   to   tour   the   world   with   the   album   reaching   #1   in   countless   countries   ,   forging   her   own   path   with   a   maturity   beyond   her   years   and   a   vision   beyond   this   world   .   

    the   tour   ends   and   she’s   smitten   by   the   charm   of   new   york   ,   opting   to   move   to   continue   to   pursue   her   music   away   from   the   tangled   complications   of   family   life   in   england   .   barely   18   and   perhaps   intoxicated   with   the   loneliness   of   a   life   spent   in   the   watching   eye   of   others   ,   the   semblance   of   privacy   is   something   she   takes   to   like   an   addict   ,   exasperating   prying   paparazzi   with   her   notorious   refusal   to   comment   on   details   of   her   personal   life   .   she   builds   a   wall   between   herself   and   the   world   ,   keeping   out   prying   eyes   with   a   tight   -   lipped   grin   .   its   at   this   time   that   she   lets   the   first   person   into   her   life   perhaps   ever   ,   a   whirlwind   romance   so   intoxicating   it   results   in   a   courthouse   marriage   done   in   secret   .   never   to   be   seen   together   ,   never   a   word   spoken   to   anyone   else   ,   stevie   relishes   in   the   secret   which   is   soon   to   sour   upon   the   passing   of   their   honeymoon   phase   .   with   her   brothers   expanding   their   reach   into   the   US   for   their   unsavory   dealings   ,   it’s   not   long   after   her   marriage   begins   that   the   conflicts   reach   a   breaking   point   ,   an   annulment   following   barely   6   months   after   they   had   traded   ‘   i   do’s   .   ’

she   takes   to   the   studio   with   a   new   resentment   of   the   concept   of   love   and   even   more   sequestered   heart   ,   producing   melodrama   which   takes   the   world   by   storm   ,   snagging   her   a   grammy   win   for   album   of   the   year   .   fatigued   from   the   constant   go-around   of   keeping   her   secrets   her   own   except   for   when   they’re   taken   to   radio   streams   ,   she   does   a   limited   tour   for   melodrama   and   lands   herself   right   back   in   new   york   at   20   ,   putting   grey3   on   the   backburner   as   she   takes   to   all   the   hedonistic   engagements   she   had   indulged   herself   in   during   her   time   on   tour   .   she’s   kept   herself   busy   between   mindless   flings   and   days-long   benders   with   hobbies   such   as   photography   and   writing   ,   the   former   of   which   is   building   her   a   rather   impressive   reputation   in   the   arts   world   .   

𝒊𝒊.  𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆 .

if   y’all   ain’t   tired   of   me   yet   god   bless   u   .   ..   .   bc   i   straight   up   b   tired   of   myself   :/

anyways   dis   is   stevie   ,   also   accepts   grey   the   same   way   ppl   talk   abt   lorde   n   switch   between   ella   n   lorde   !   she’s   not   picky   :~)

major   inspos   are   matty   healy   from   the   1975   n   hayley   kiyoko   if   she   was   less   of   a   try   hard   .   little   bit   of   kristen   stewart   in   there   ,   big   2016   ruby   rose   energy   n   brie   larson   top   me   tomfoolery   as   well   !   

basically   da   fuckboi   of   ur   dreams   ..      ..   .   lil   devilish   londoner   who   stays   thinkin   she’s   the   closest   thing   to   a   god   on   this   green   earth   !

notably   ,   she’s   incredibly   intelligent   and   profound   ,   tends   to   take   on   a   rather   patronizing   and   condescending   tone   bc   she   straight   up   b   thinkin   she’s   usually   the   smartest   person   in   the   room   (   how   annoying   )

so   laid   back   n   observant   ,   rlly   has   no   need   to   raise   her   voice   ever   bc   her   arguments   b   runnin   circles   around   ppl   !   imagine   the   way   harry   styles   talks   low   n   slow   n   calculated.   .   .   .   .   cameron   from   love   is   blind   ,.   ..   .      kristen   stewart   lowkey   sometimes   ..   ..   ..   das   grey   .    sexy   ass   alto   monotone  🤤🤤

i   dont   wanna   use   chaotic   bc   she   rlly   isnt   the   WILDEST   bitch   but   that   god   complex   means   she   deadass   thinks   she   can   get   away   w   what   she   wants   n   she   usually   does   ?   less   of   a   chaotic   evil   n   more   like   a   neutral   evil   lmao   she   can   follow   rules   just   fine   she   jsut   prefers   whatever   suits   her   better

on   that   note   —   OBSCENELY   self   obsessed   .   follows   her   own   natural   whims   n   impulses   bc   that’s   just   what   appeals   to   her   .   is   inclined   to   follow   rules   if   she   calculates   itll   work   in   her   favor   bc   she   also   doesn’t   like   to   look   sloppy   !

super   secretive   and   OBSESSED   w   her   presentation   .   every   movement   is   calculated   n   she   doesnt   want   anyone   seeing   a   side   of   her   that   she   hasn’t   designated   for   them   !   she   doesn’t   care   what   other   ppl   think   but   she   DOES   care   abt   what   she   sees   herself   doing   n   her   vision   .   doesnt   fit   the   vision   ?   will   NOT   happen   in   her   book   .

straight   up   a   WHORRE   lmao   she   likes   2   fill   the   void   left   by   a   lack   of   human   connection   w   sexual   intimacy   n   then   is   like   nice   imma   have   u   leave   now   love   LMAO   .   does   not   discriminate   and   is   rlly   inclined   to   follow   any   sexual   impulse

this   was   implied   but   her   relationships   are   super   messy   ?   does   the   leonardo   dicaprio   thing   where   she   will   never   fuckin   discuss   her   love   life   in   interviews   or   anything   so   ppl   just   gotta   SPECULATE   .   she   lets   ppl   post   all   they   want   abt   her   but   she   wont   say   a   WORD   abt   them   JWHEKJWH   her   socials   r   basically   just   abt   her   n   her   music   we   said   SELFISH   lads   .   she’s   bad   @   bein   tied   down   n   is   probs   polyamorous   as   it   stands   but   im   p   sure   she   has   cheated   on   every   single   person   she   has   ever   been   with   lmao

lowkey   a   shit   friend   most   of   the   time   lMAO   she   can   b   really   unreliable   bc   u   guys   can   have   plans   n   then   she   takes   someone   home   n   misses   yalls   plans   n   then   texts   u   4   hours   later   after   all   ur   missed   calls   n   is   like   my   bad   bruv   i   got   tied   up   AS   IF   THAT   FIXES   IT   KWEJKWJEKWE

chain   smoker   n   its   nastie   but   lowkey   sexy   somehow   :/  ,   will   ONLY   wear   outfits   that   r   equal   parts   thrifted   n   designer   ,   always   has   her   hands   in   her   pockets   n   if   her   jacket   has   a   hood   its   UP   like   a   big   ole   homo   ,   is   rlly   annoying   bc   shes   good   looking   n   KNOWS   it   so   she   uses   it   to   her   advantage   ,   wants   2   get   her   motorcycle   license   ,   judges   u   based   off   the   music   u   play   in   the   car   ,   judges   u   on   everything   tbh.

[greatfay]

Sabrina

Ohhhhh boy.

my all-time ultimate fave character:

Ambrose Spellman. First of all who are his parents? How is he Sabrina’s cousin? Whatever. This man is so beautiful right like all the time, or 90% of the time, idk why the other characters don’t just record his voice and play it back whenever they have a dumbass moment, a sort of audio “What Would Ambrose Do” recorder because every single time, Ambrose ends up being riiiiight. And there’s still so much about him that’s gone unexplored imo. The Vatican plot, the group he was a part of, him grieving his boyfriend from season 2?? Just saying, considering the character of Salem was split into the not-talking Cat and Ambrose, he really should be more intertwined into the plot.

a character I didn’t used to like but now do:

Prudence. She also grew on me, though there’s some issues with this show’s writing and I think it comes from Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa trying to be Ryan Murphy in the worst way possible. Yes you can quote me on this, don’t @ me, argue with your mama. Prudence and her Weird Sisters are basically the Unholy Trinity of CAOS, except that unlike Brittany and Santana, Agatha and Dorcas never get real character development, and Prudence’s cold outer shell slowly melts only to pop back up unexpectedly and cruelly, so it’s like I like her! But then she’ll say/do things in random moments that makes it hard to like her because The Writing. Liiiike her blaming Ambrose at the end of Part 3 for that thing that happened. Also casting a person of color to play a fictitious fantasy race that calls other races “half-breeds” is never cool lmao, I’ve noticed this is a trend in fantasy, basically take your character who’s supposed to be a race supremacist and cast a black person to be them and suddenly it’s not as bad—it’s worse. And anyway I’d take a whole spin-off miniseries of Ambrose and Prudence with her TWO FUCKING SWORDS prancing across the Scottish countryside and down New Orleans streets on a quest. Geralt is shaking.

a character I used to like but now don’t:

Nick. I love a bad boy. I love a bad boy with layers. Everything about his character was supposed to be a tempting fruit to convince Sabrina to sign her name in the book, and for the most part it works!!! So the Dark Lord might ask you to sacrifice a baby here and there, you get to have magic! And do sex magic with Gavin Leatherwood. And I had very different expectations for where his arc would go in Part 3. Sulking was not a good look for him. Jealousy was also not a good look for him. And the foot thing was gross af. I don’t see how his character can remain relevant moving forward if he’s not even Sabrina’s friend, let alone her boyfriend.

a character I’m indifferent about:

Sabrina. At first, I liked her characterization because as much as I’m a sucker for magic, it would be hard to just ghost all your friends. Especially if you have real friends, people who would be there for you, people you know are vulnerable and want to protect. I liked Sabrina as this half-in/half-out girl who wants both worlds and does the right thing. I also don’t mind a hero who does shady shit to save the day because I’m all about that moral complexity. But now she’s a bit annoying, like pull out your moral compass and pick a point! So I feel nothing toward her. My positive and negative feelings cancel out.

a character who deserved better:

Lilith. She should’ve been Queen of Hell. That whole plot point should’ve been stretched out WAY longer, especially the “they’re praying to ME” scene. BUT. I’ll say this. As much as I would’ve liked a whole Queen Lilith/Church of Lilith thing, miss thang didn’t really market herself at all. Lucifer knew exactly how to get these people eating out of his hands, and Lilith does… nothing! When they prayed to her for the first time, she should’ve made all the statues cry milk, butterflies sing with the voices of the dead, and a rainbow appear in the sky. It’s about the Drama, she could’ve a whole following but spent the whole season being Sabrina’s Unholy Godmother. Which of course, is due to the Writing. I’m just surprised she never betrayed Sabrina, and also her getting stuck with her abuser again is disgusting.

a ship I’ve never been able to get into:

Sabrina/Harvey. They’re portrayed as endgame in the beginning but I knew he’d always be the thing holding her back from Plot Stuff, so he had to go; plus he never had a positive experience with magic and was never going to be onboard. Next is, surprisingly, Ambrose/Prudence. I really like the Sherlock/Watson thing they have going on, but Ambrose is just so nice and Prudence so blunt that they only have chemistry when they’re fucking, and tbh my “ships” are actual relationships, not fuckingships, there has to be shared emotional baggage and communication, which they didn’t have. Ya know what… Sabrina x Prudence. Now there’s a couple I would root for.

a ship I’ve never been able to get over:

Sabrina/Nick because it was the sneeze that never happened. Feels like I didn’t even see it onscreen. Next is Tommy/Life because he shouldn’t have died, and my OTP is Faustus/Jail because he’s a fucking creep.

a cute, low-key ship:

Theo/Robin. Listen… not only are they cute as heck individually, but together it’s too powerful. And it’s such a big deal that a trans masculine main character can be the object of someone’s affections that were so strong that the character in question betrays their own family, a group of mythical creatures and gods, to do the right thing and protect him. Runner-up is Zelda/

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it:

I don’t think I have one  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened:

Zelda/Faustus. Literally I vomit, I euuuughhh, euuuuughhh 🤢 listen I am not a woman, I don’t think I believe in incarnations? But watching their interactions triggered like… flashbacks in me as if I was a suburban housewife in the year 1958 and my husband will be home in 5 minutes and the “shrimp jello salad” I was supposed to have ready for him is a complete disaster and he’s going to beat me. I got Game of Thrones flashbacks watching their interactions.

my favourite storyline/moment:

When I actually thought Sabrina killed one of the Weird Sisters was a great moment for me personally, also liked the flashbacks of Lilith in the dawn of Earth, also loved Ambrose and Prudence’s adventures across the world.

a storyline that never should have been written:

That whole nightmare hallucination where Theo (before he changed his pronouns and name) woke up in a “boy’s body” was so intimately disgusting and terrible and problematic, it almost completely undoes every good thing about Theo’s storylines and the representation.

Harvey getting accepted to some artsy private school only to be haunted by nightmares of the Dark Lord??? Where did that go again? I forgot.

my first thoughts on the show:

Dark, creepy, stylish. I like it.

my thoughts now:

Messier, sometimes frustrating, still dark, still stylish. I like it? 

Ask me about a tv show/movie series/book series!

[blacknovelist]

CLAUDE VON RIEGAN for the character meme pls?

BWOP HEADCANON MEME

C L A U D E V O N R I _ G _ _

C: Can they swim well?

Hm..... At first I thought yes, but keeping in mind upbringing.... I think he knows how to swim, and thusly can. He isn't like, captain of the swim meet but he ain't gonna be drowning anytime soon. So... yes?

L: What is their favourite board game?

Claude loves games like Betrayal at House on the Hill, which always change when you play them, along with more strategic ones such as Dominion. Between them though, I think he'd enjoy Dominion the most (though it's more like a card game than a board game, so maybe these two and Settlers of Catan can tie for fave).

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Chemistry! Also, he'd totally be great at social studies and sociology classes u can't change my mind.

U: What’s their voice like?

Pre-skip, Claude tends to talk fast and hard. His every day voice is like a wall, see -- he uses them like shields painted with faces and puts them smack dab between him and others, tries to convince them that what comes out is what's inside. Worry reigns in him at how others see him and to speak is the best way to affect that, so he must speak quick. 

Even when he's getting down deep he talks with a little hardness, but that one's because he isn't sure of himself, quite yet, still unsettled as a person. Still, when he gets more genuine, his speech slows. He sets them down from his heart, which must work to dredge these words up, as opposed to his mind, which whirls at top speed all the time. 

Post skip, Claude's manner changes. With leading the Alliance comes the assurance of a leader -- his hardness and speed are unneeded, now, though they still yet come by sometimes. But he no longer needs words to form impressions for him. Claude had learned to do that with physical presence, with fewer words. There is no more worry or confusion on his goals, where he is going, what he will be. This Claude is a Claude who understands: that who he is now is the Leader of the Alliance; that he can love his people and be angry at their blindnesses both, that he can have the power to change that; that his teacher(s) are people he can trust, without fail, to be who they've always been. 

D: How they react to being flirted with?

I know everyone portrays him as being smooth, and that's not wrong, but... I feel like Claude also has not considered being flirted with before. Given the difficulties he grew up with -- constantly attacked and hated seemingly without reason and certainly without his deserving it -- it wouldn't be a surprise to me if Claude even struggles with the idea of people genuinely liking him for who he is and how he presents himself. He'd hardly have been told he looks great by the very people who grew up despising his mixed blood. 

So I think that if he's flirted with, while he will do his best to roll with it, his knee-jerk reactions and the feelings he will maintain in his heart is that of confusion and flustered-ness. Pre-skip especially. Post skip he'd be more used to it, seeing as everyone views him primarily positively at that time, but there's something about people genuinely flirting with him that, once it passes the Wary Anti-Betrayal part of his brain, kind of makes him go "hey hold on what????"

E: How are they with children?

I think he's okay with them! He'd be surprised at how much energy it takes to keep up with them, perhaps, and be caught off guard there -- and he takes a minute to get to know them, to get into the swing of caring about them. But he'd get there, and then I think he does well.

V: What’s the easiest way to annoy them?

Canon facts Claude gets "annoyed" with characters like Judith, who share positions of power, appear unflappable, and who always seem just as prepared as he is. Continually, in GD route, Judith is the one person that can get under his skin, though he still clearly cares and thinks very highly of her. They verbally spar a lot!

So the best way to annoy Claude is to pester. Ironic, considering his method for gaining secrets is "relentless nagging" in his own words lmao. But tbh Claude is... less of a verbal nagger and more just sneaky and good with words. So like, he's way less of a nag than he might think. 

When people undermine him -- his plans, or his words, or his thoughts -- in any way, minor or not, he tends to get frustrated, even if grateful for it. He's listed as disliking illogical arguments. Someone pestering him, or someone continually one upping in a way he can't argue with -- both these things would irritate him after a while. 

O: What would it take to break them, inside and out?

Claude's whole thing is built up on like... plans. Contingencies on contingencies. Out-thinking the enemy, figuring out the beats to their tactics so he can slip through the cracks. He accepts he is not the best but he puts pride into his skill at winning fights with minimal losses, at out-thinking the foe to the point of even trying to avoid fights, the point of ending what he can before it begins and in keeping the advantage when it can't be prevented.

So I think to break him would be someone using this penchant against him to kill his people, back him into a corner and conquer his lands. Turn his pride into the reason for death, in his eyes at least. Damned if you do and damned if you don't, see? But slowly. It has to be slow -- it can't be losses 24/7, it's gotta be a majority. He has to know he's being played with and that the hope exists so he can eventually lose even that.

He might lose his mind before he falls that far.

N: What do they usually eat for breakfast?

I imagine he usually eats fruit or granola bars -- easy to pick up and go!

R: What are their hands like?

Calloused and scarred but only a little, and especially in the fingers and palms. The backs of his hands probably have some old chemical scars, his fingers flecked with nicks from arrows and plants-of-ill-effect, palms leathery after all the bows shot (AND axes swung, come post skip). 

They're warm when one takes them, and steady as the earth. Deft still, in spite of everything. 

I: On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do they love themselves?

Claude, pre skip, hovered solidly in the 4-6 range. Fact, he's aware the people who attacked him as a child were wrong. Fact, being surrounded by people who hate and scorn you, even while beloved by family, affects you. This academy Claude is a Claude still learning, a Claude still coming into himself. He has faith in his abilities, yes, but that is not the same as self love.

Post skip, I think he's made the arduous journey into the 6-8 range. He's more assured, he spent years growing and training and waiting and you know what? He's allowed to be proud, to be happy, to be sure of himself now. And it's difficult to be -- he still dips, as we all do -- but he tries. 

G: How do they flirt?

Claude strikes me as one to flirt more with actions and indirect statements than anything. A flower in one's hands, a cup of tea shared, a difficult admission of trust or emotion where he'd have hidden before. It's a lot of little moments until the time comes that he is ready to confess or confront about it, or until the target of his affection notices and confronts first. 

He wouldn't flirt with someone he does not want to flirt with -- on a related note, he wouldn't flirt with someone he isn't sure he can put faith in. 

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: 👍? Jimmy: you? Janis: what kind of answer isn't that, boy 😏 Jimmy: what kind of question were it in the first place, girl? Janis: honestly, try and be a good host Janis: you just want me to be shit Jimmy: that's not what I want Janis: Go on, you've got me interested Jimmy: What, you're not riveted by Gracie's IRL storytime? 😱😱 Janis: if I was, I'd be subscribed Jimmy: OMG you're NOT suchanathlete69??! Jimmy: that's awkward Janis: Catfished again Janis: unlucky, mate Jimmy: did wonder why you were saving your best chat for them late night 🗨 we were having Janis: 🙄 Hilarious Janis: obviously you'd have got none if I'd have known you were coolguy666 Jimmy: 💔 Janis: I know Janis: welcome for the pain for your art Jimmy: #whenyourmusenevertakesadayoff Janis: this is a business trip Jimmy: owe you a golf holiday, I know Jimmy: gonna have to proper unwind for a bit as only a rich girl can Janis: No, no Janis: golf trips are boys only clubs Janis: 💔 💀👑 Jimmy: poor baby Janis: please never call her that Jimmy: you don't think it's a goer? reckon she'd 💕 it Janis: 🤢 Janis: she doesn't 💕 you, soz Jimmy: I'd obvs say it in her daddy's accent, not that thick Janis: Stop 😂 Janis: we cannot afford to pull over Jimmy: he ain't driving that fast, let's just jump out Janis: I know her voice IS that annoying Jimmy: could easily drown her out, mine's worse Janis: nah Janis: no 🥇 for you on that one Jimmy: [nudges her like rude] Janis: [nudges him back like it's a compliment, idiot] Jimmy: [a look like it's not one of your best 😏] Janis: [a look like you want my best rn?] Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [just the longest LOOK back ever but then looking at the fam like 😒 ugh] Jimmy: [just touching her 😒 face so she's looking at him again like forget them] Janis: [makes a lil noise like oh, but then so 😍] Jimmy: [a lil kiss but really soft and quick so nobody else notices] Janis: you are so Jimmy: you are Janis: no you Jimmy: [kisses her again less softly or quickly because no you] Janis: [goes in like dgaf fam] Jimmy: [y'all can deal we know Grace is the only one who's bothered and she's seen worse/is chatting away] Janis: better? Jimmy: how do you want me to answer that? Janis: truthfully Janis: obvs Jimmy: [shakes his head because we know any time they kiss he just wants to kiss more #mood but she could read that no as he's not gonna answer] Janis: [is a bit like ?? but shrugs like okay] Jimmy: [I like to think he's about to say something but then his phone is going off cos all that fam drama whenever he goes anywhere] Janis: [just sitting there, not knowing what the craic is #always] Jimmy: [sums up this era so accurately] Janis: do you reckon that lot are even in the car yet Jimmy: probably still trying to fit the tall one's body in the boot Janis: great Janis: HATE when you have to wait for the gals to decapitate ⏲😩 Jimmy: I'll tell 'em to crack on Janis: 'cos they always listen to you Jimmy: duh Janis: you'll need at least (1) sports car for those privileges Jimmy: better get to nicking one then Janis: oh yeah Janis: gonna be loads rocking up Jimmy: Challenge accepted, Jules Janis: know I said it was a business trip Janis: but gonna be suspicious if you don't at least pretend to enjoy the tunes Jimmy: 🥇 but it'll still be a stretch Janis: you got this, babe Jimmy: 🏆💪 Janis: all tight tanks and short shorts, is it Janis: gotcha Jimmy: [😏] Jimmy: can't bully you into wearing pjs everywhere Janis: too right Janis: well soft, you Jimmy: [pushes her like oi but deliberately really softly] Janis: [😏] Janis: I might've brought a pair Janis: if you're lucky Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: not a paddy Janis: then I'm gonna be well cold in our tent tonight Jimmy: not gonna let that happen Jimmy: what kind of fake boyfriend would do Janis: one who's busy jacking cars maybe Jimmy: fancy cars have heated seats, you'll be alright Jimmy: on or off my lap Janis: on Janis: thanks Jimmy: [pulls her onto his lap now so casually] Janis: [snuggles into him as casually like, could be warmer] Jimmy: [puts his arms around her like he's doing it for warmth but we know he's just pulling her closer too] Janis: alright, I'll trust you Jimmy: alright, I might be a bit lucky Janis: you can be Jimmy: [such a LOOK] Janis: I can't wait to be alone with you again Jimmy: you sure we can't pull over? Janis: can you reach the break from here? Janis: [reaching her leg over like she's gonna but they are obviously nowhere near] Jimmy: [just looking at her like well you moving about is not helping] Janis: [is fully aware and enjoying it herself] Jimmy: [whispers in her ear that he hates her because we can't say what we really wanna say] Janis: [#into it and having to do the most to hide it from the whole van rn] Janis: you're so rude Jimmy: how am I? Jimmy: it's you Janis: you started it Jimmy: it's your fault Janis: it's not my fault you look like that Janis: or feel like Jimmy: but you're so Jimmy: that's nowt to do with me Janis: it's everything to do with you Jimmy: alright maybe a bit Jimmy: I just Janis: I know Jimmy: do you? Janis: [a LOOK up like don't I?] Jimmy: [just gonna kiss her so you don't say something you shouldn't thank you boy] Janis: [a moment] Janis: Me too Jimmy: [looking at her because she's so beautiful it's killing us all] Janis: [when you can never keep looking as long as he can so you move somehow closer to hide] Jimmy: [making it so she has to look at you, excuse you sir cos you're shamelessly hot about it, as if all the eye contact in the world will do the job of telling her you love her so you don't have to do it #ifonly] Janis: [when you literally cannot and you go way too hard 'cos you have no other option because what can you say] Jimmy: [excuse them rn everyone, thank god Grace is loud af whether she's still talking or blasting music or both lol] Janis: [at least the camper does offer a degree of privacy too you two are clearly in the back alone] Jimmy: [mhmm you're all very welcome for that] Janis: ['can you be quiet?' when you're so serious suddenly 'cos the need is so real] Jimmy: [nods but like can you actually boy I am less convinced] Janis: [do your best lads 'cos we doing this regardless tbh] Jimmy: [you must've been pretty quiet in that kitchen the other day as his brother and sister were in the next room then, you can do this] Janis: [we believe in you, in his ear whilst she can still trust herself to whisper though, 'I'm gonna make it so hard for you'] Jimmy: [already biting his lip because you can't be making a noise that fast #challengeaccepted but he obvs wants to and would've] Janis: [biting his ear lobe at the same time 'cos forever a thing now for all those #mems 'it was never hard to fake this part, you know' 'cos we all know that was never fake 'cept the very first time 'you're so fucking wantable'] Jimmy: ['its so different with you' even as a whisper you can imagine how his voice sounds cos as much as he meant that like he's so over all the girls in his DMs telling him how hot he is etc that 100% isn't ALL he means, likewise he doesn't just mean this is so different from the fake and we all know it #emotions] Janis: [when it's obviously exactly the same for you and it's been known since the first kiss so it throws you when he says it 'cos still just think you're broken or something at this point and you really wanna ask really so he says it again but you don't wanna give yourself away so you just go in 'cos you need all the moments] Jimmy: [safer that both of you don't talk for a bit tbh] Janis: [deffo gonna be saying his name though like it's the only word you know casually] Jimmy: [so into it, she was not wrong about making it hard for him to shhhh] Janis: [so into that, soz to everyone else we know they do not care] Jimmy: [glad as I am Harold is not turning up at this festival always a bit gutted because you need to know just how much you can't compete sir] Janis: [foreals, though it should be obvious with how hard you're being ignored/she's not hitting you up] Jimmy: [just Mia in his DMs what a downgrade] Janis: [when even her intentions aren't pure, poor boy lmao] Jimmy: [I'm sure there's also loads of girls from your own school, I don't feel sorry for you boy] Janis: [no one should] Jimmy: [he's a bad egg] Janis: [and not even bringing it sexually, rude] Jimmy: [he and Mia so #fated cos she's obvs not either] Janis: [imagine they got together together if Mia wasn't cray] Jimmy: [they're getting as together as she ever does, being in love with her dad and everything, like he'll last longer than anyone else has] Janis: [awh, get married guys] Jimmy: [thank god they can't have babies cos imagine] Janis: [gutted y'all won't be invited to the wedding and baby shower] Jimmy: [so glad she's as barren so she can't have a child just to hurt Grace when that all comes out] Janis: [the levels of petty] Jimmy: [she'd be gutted she can't force one of the others to do it] Janis: [do not need that level of drama ty ladies] Jimmy: [anyway is there any other shit we wanna do with JJ before they get there?] Janis: [we know the vibe, in their happy bubble now 'til they have to deal with the flat whites again] Jimmy: [ignore your fam for as long as you can as well boy, you need a break] Janis: [do we wanna hit the flat white points in here or ref on socials or a mix of?] Jimmy: [we can probably do both cos plenty of slagging off of them to be done] Janis: [right, what do we wanna do first, what makes most sense, Asia maybe, or Mia] Jimmy: [we said that Mia hits that first aid tent pretty fast for the attention so we could do that first] Janis: [lego 👍] Janis: don't you fancy being 🥇 nurse? Janis: sure you can plump a pillow better than any of them 😏 Jimmy: that'll be why I'm legging it in the other direction Jimmy: she's getting too used to having me about as is Jimmy: and I've only got a 💀💀💀 pact with you Jimmy: unless 👵👴💕 come asking Janis: treat 'em mean is her whole thing, she'll 👀 your game from a mile off, like Janis: and I'll keep mine out for any 👵👴 that are down with the kids Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: d'ya reckon we could convince her 💊 were sleeping tabs or Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: though if she tells me she loves me, I will need the med tent for real 🤢 Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: 💔 Janis: don't lie Janis: all you want is her love, be like you doubled your dose Jimmy: steady on Jimmy: can't all pile into first aid Janis: not getting in no tent with them again Janis: the ☁ of fucking glitter and 'perfume' was worse than tear gas Janis: gonna have flashbacks Jimmy: Baby Jimmy: I get it, you already ✨ eh, vampire girl Janis: any more glow would just be showing off Janis: not like me, obvs Jimmy: don't sound like you at all Jimmy: [but kisses her] Janis: you tryna save me, yeah Jimmy: got some first aid skills of my own Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: [😏] Janis: can we keep that between us Janis: or they'll all be faking it Jimmy: they were warned only one of you is getting mouth to mouth ages ago Janis: her man ain't here so Janis: you're well in Jimmy: ⏲💔😭 Jimmy: [playfully pushes her out of the way like I g2g] Janis: me that's 💔💔💔 Janis: dickhead Jimmy: [pulls her into a hug that's meant to be OTT but is just real] Janis: [when you can't even pretend to push him away] Jimmy: ['I told you ages ago, I just want you' as a whisper in her ear but with kisses in between the words like the first time he said it for those mems] Janis: [the 😍 are so real, at least they must be somewhere nearby but definitely not for their benefit really we know 'good'] Jimmy: [we know he's giving them back] Janis: [they need to be dragged to an artist they 100% don't wanna see rn] Jimmy: [10000% cos for him that's literally all of them and I vote she sees community service girl with her 📷 but she doesn't see them cos busy and Janis makes sure Jimothy don't see her lol lol] Janis: [tbh, we all know there's ways of doing that, namely dancing with him, even if the music is far too shit so you have to make your own rhythm] Jimmy: [he's only got 👀s for her at the best of times so it's really not a challenge to distract him lol] Janis: [this can be when Ella freaks out too, when you and Mia just wanna be alone in the tent lmao you seem SO gay] Jimmy: [oh ladies] Janis: 🖖🕙✂ Jimmy: ? Janis: contenders for love's young dream Jimmy: you and Mr Lucas got a better shot Jimmy: 🎯💕 Janis: sure, he's less 💀 than them but young is still a stretch Jimmy: he's too young for me Janis: who isn't Janis: dead fussy Jimmy: we can't all be as unfussy as the #squad Jimmy: 💀#2 excluded Janis: you can say slags, it's alright Janis: never hear you over this racket Jimmy: [shouts it because that nerd] Janis: [loling] Jimmy: didn't have their hearing checked Jimmy: shit nursing that Janis: your standards are very high, it's been known Janis: [OTT smug face like look at me] Jimmy: [twirls her around because nerd] Janis: [fully have a nerdy dance moment and knock into people be those dicks 'cos the level you do not care about anyone else ever] Jimmy: [literally nobody else here as far as you two are concerned] Janis: [until we blow that up anyway] Jimmy: [speaking of I like to think Grace is starting to put the moves on whatever guy she ends up pulling to annoy Mia cos not there to stop her] Janis: [telling her all about his band and set, like how fascinating] Jimmy: [the fam she's grown up in, boy she knows] Janis: [when you realize none of 'em are paying attention now, Asia's probably missing and the two left are flirting so you see your chance] Janis: wanna go find some overpriced food n drink? Jimmy: stop calling me fat OMG 😱😱 Janis: [pokes his non-existent belly 'cos you ain't even with how much you smoke/general decent genetics, lucky] Janis: that's what we 💗 about you Janis: make us look better Jimmy: first off, Asia couldn't look any better, tah very much 👻💕 Jimmy: second, piss off you Janis: 🤞 an opportune date rapist has thought so too and we won't have to see her 'til tomorrow Janis: [going in the direction of the food trucks etc] Jimmy: [following her obvs] Janis: [holding her hand back like 'don't get lost'] Jimmy: [giving her look like he might find Asia but boy we all know you'd be gutted instead of thrilled if you did, stop playing] Janis: [gesturing with your free hand like be my guest, but 😒 face with it] Jimmy: [return of the pouty lip kiss thing because he can't even pretend he wants anyone else at this point] Janis: [enjoy your moment being so in everyone's way in this crowd] Jimmy: [we know you love it] Janis: [stay back community service gal] Jimmy: [we're not ready for you yet hun] Janis: [well you are gonna have to shoot your shot soon 'cos this is only a weekend but ignoring you rn thanks 'cos full on alone time 'cos the flat whites are being messy by themselves] Jimmy: [soz jj have gotta do the most so it's the most awkward when you do appear] Janis: [oosh she's gonna be so mad, already mad you're here like no you ain't allowed lol] Jimmy: [like I think she should do something at the last possible moment so then it's like raw af when they gotta leave] Janis: [I vibe] Jimmy: [so for now you can be happy nerds until Asia's bf appears and is like ??] Janis: [oh sir, you don't even know] Jimmy: [they'd both be so relieved you're not Harry though tbh] Janis: [#bffs probably checking his socials so hard making sure he looks busy somewhere else like] Jimmy: [she can be doing that while he's having a text argument with either his dad or sister casually] Janis: [awkward if he saw that out of context] Jimmy: [OMG should we] Janis: [why not yo] Jimmy: [let's say he goes to take her phone to look at something on Cass' socials cos she's blocked him as a fuming 12 year old would and that's how he sees it cos you know he's not gonna ask if he can borrow it just take it like a rude hoe] Janis: [when you're just like excuse me, taking it back 'cos you lowkey aren't even thinking how that looks] Jimmy: [looking at her like EXCUSE YOU cos of how it does look] Janis: [taking what would seem like a rude amount of time to get it like ? then just pshing like oh please] Janis: checking he ain't coming Jimmy: 👍 Janis: really Janis: what is up with you? Jimmy: [just shaking his head because fuming] Janis: ['what?' and a look like I know this cannot be about him rn] Jimmy: leave it out Janis: you can read my messages if you like, 'cos I ain't sent him none Jimmy: I don't wanna read whatever bollocks he reckons is top 🍑📞 Jimmy: you're alright Janis: yeah, me either Jimmy: don't wanna hear your protests either Jimmy: @ Bill's 👻 Janis: Don't be a dick 🙄 Jimmy: you only about it when he's doing it? Janis: yeah, obviously Jimmy: 👌 Janis: seriously Janis: so you're gonna be in a mood now, for what Jimmy: for what? Jimmy: are you serious? Janis: I told you why I was looking at his shit, why do you have an issue with that? Jimmy: you weren't gonna say nowt til I caught you at it Jimmy: how's that to start with? Janis: don't make it sound like something it ain't Janis: it's irrelevant as long as he's not showing up, that's why Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: you being glued to your screen ain't irrelevant Janis: for fuck's sake Janis: I'm not glued to my screen Jimmy: not now, dickhead Janis: oh, you want me to be loving this convo more Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: wow, please tell me more Janis: 😍 Jimmy: go back to working out where he is Jimmy: never seen you care so much about owt else Janis: because I don't want to fucking see him Jimmy: check out his socials a bit harder while you're saying that Jimmy: see if you can really take the piss Janis: [walking off from wherever they're currently situated] Janis: fuck this then Jimmy: Great talk, babe Janis: don't talk to me then Janis: and don't fucking babe me Janis: as bad as that lot now Jimmy: Yeah I got the message that you don't wanna 🗨 Jimmy: could always block me like you ain't done him Janis: What do you want me to say then Janis: 'cos you ain't listened to fuck all I have Jimmy: I heard you Janis: don't believe me then Jimmy: you easy could've said to me, check he ain't coming Janis: why would I when I can do it myself and not bother you Jimmy: you don't wanna see him, there's a reason Janis: he's a prick? Jimmy: is that a question? Janis: hardly Jimmy: you think I can't handle him or what? Janis: Obviously not Janis: you did, didn't you Jimmy: what then? Janis: it didn't make any sense to me to have you thinking about him and if he might come and all Janis: that's it Jimmy: like I weren't Janis: well that can't be put on me Janis: or do, whatever Jimmy: I give a shit about what you do and don't want Jimmy: do what you want with that Janis: then believe me when I say I don't want him Jimmy: Alright Janis: is it or not Jimmy: I said alright Jimmy: come back Janis: not yet Jimmy: please Janis: don't do that Jimmy: I'm sorry Janis: it's fine Janis: whatever Jimmy: it's not Janis: I just need Janis: some fresh air Jimmy: I get it, everyone's doing my head in but you Jimmy: I didn't mean to do yours in an' all Janis: you mean 'til you caught me hoeing I weren't Janis: are you alright? Jimmy: I mean you weren't, that's why I said it Jimmy: you're not Jimmy: I were doing my own head in about that dickhead, you did nowt Janis: we can count him as a no-show, anyway Janis: not stalking him in vain Jimmy: yeah Janis: don't make me sound as cliche to say he ain't worth the mental energy Jimmy: don't make me sound as cliche as some dickhead who's only bothered by a bigger dickhead Janis: he's just some dickhead Janis: this town is full of 'em Jimmy: like I said Jimmy: ain't got the 🎻🎻 out for him Janis: well I don't need it, tah Jimmy: not playing you a song either, girl Janis: yeah, I noticed you didn't answer my question Jimmy: probably don't need answering then Janis: your mood is obvious, obvs Janis: you could give me a why Jimmy: I did Jimmy: I said everyone's doing my head in Janis: yeah Janis: beyond the obvious everyone and their standard annoying bullshit or Jimmy: depends Janis: depends on what Jimmy: what else you've noticed Jimmy: I dunno what's obvious to you or what bullshit you reckon is my standard Janis: 🔎🔎 Janis: that'd be telling Jimmy: there you go then Janis: take some of their drink Janis: doing them and us a favour Jimmy: 👍 Janis: it'll make you feel better Jimmy: weren't arguing Jimmy: no need to convince me, mate Janis: it's my calling Jimmy: don't give up 🏃 Janis: most people hear have heard the good word Janis: then some, state of 'em Jimmy: but have they heard Bill's? Janis: it's his 🌍 babe Janis: we're all just players Jimmy: I know Jimmy: I'm already a fan Janis: hipster scum Jimmy: it's my calling Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 😎🚬 Janis: good idea too Janis: don't need to tell you that though Jimmy: just did Janis: do plenty of things I don't need to Jimmy: you wanting a 🏆 for that or what? Janis: you wanted me to come back a second ago, dickhead Jimmy: I still want you to come back Janis: then don't sass me Janis: you are well becoming one of them Jimmy: saying that ain't gonna stop me wanting you back Jimmy: however many times you compare me to them slags Janis: shout it again so I know it's real? Jimmy: [does] Janis: [comes back from wherever she was, not that far away like 👏] Jimmy: [just looking at her like he hasn't seen her for a thousand years] Janis: [just coming over and hugging him in a way that is clearly genuine] Jimmy: [hugging her back really tightly even if he has to put that stolen vodka down to do it] Janis: ['I just want you too, alright'] Jimmy: [when you gotta kiss her because overwhelmed by emotions because we only got that cheating ex is our past no ride or die and no crying at the festival boy] Janis: [we just always kissing so we can't admit the obvious right now god bless] Jimmy: [both of you acting like you're shit with words but we know the truth is you're scared to say anything too hardcore because you're not shit with words at all] Janis: [mhmm] Jimmy: [just not letting her go cos you're a clingy bitch] Janis: [doing that thing where you're backwards and just let him walk you around as one to cheer him] Jimmy: [feeding her some vodka because why let her do it herself when you can and make it a moment] Janis: [#aboutit even if you gotta be like 😏 'you trying to get me drunk?'] Jimmy: ['not much of a challenge that' forever calling her a pisshead and/or lighweight but smiling] Janis: ['wrong twin' and an OTT pissed off face whilst you return the vodka favour] Jimmy: [loling don't choke boy] Janis: ['I don't find it funny, thank you very much' but not actually mad] Jimmy: [tickling her to try and make her laugh too] Janis: [tryna escape but not that hard moment] Jimmy: [you know he's gotta make it hot and pin her up against something soz not soz] Janis: [when those #mems hit and you're 😳] Jimmy: [telling her you missed her even though she was only gone for a hot sec cos you're highkey] Janis: ['you are such a headfuck' followed by the most torturously slow kiss ever 'cos this whole situation got you like] Jimmy: [SUCH a noise because torture is right] Janis: [going at it like you're mad at him] Jimmy: [enjoy it cos we gonna make all that Asia drama happen soon] Janis: [oh Asia you fool, I like to think the people who's tent you're in don't even know that you're there like they're just chilling with a BBQ or whatever] Jimmy: [same though] Janis: [but your mans clearly thinks you're cheating on him so you getting dumped, poor hoe] Jimmy: [Mia and Ella would have totally encouraged him to believe that] Janis: [gotta let them have some victories, sadly] Jimmy: [I do love what a shit time you anorexic gays are clearly having though] Janis: [yes, overall this has been worth it, not that JJ are gonna care about that once we fuck this all up with community service girl but still] Jimmy: [soz lads] Janis: [hohaha it works out in the end so got to be done] Jimmy: [you gotta be pushed or you'll be fwb until you're like 23] Janis: [and there are babies to be had just you wait lmao] Jimmy: [beautiful af babies] Janis: [but for today, Asia drama pops off] Jimmy: [when he's gonna be worried cos he's a good boy not because he's 😍 thank you gals] Janis: [the level of 👀 they'll all be] Jimmy: [like soz he's triggered by her just disappearing shut your mouths ladies] Janis: [all be looking and shouting and pissing people off who are tryna kip probably like be those hoes] Jimmy: [how drunk the flat whites are I can't even] Janis: [Janis like 'I'll stay here in case she comes back' 'cos cannot be seen with them/does not care about Asia we all know lol] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna be separated but you have to go look because the squad can't be trusted to do fuck all rn] Janis: Godspeed Jimmy: Tah Janis: don't let lizard boy get in a punch up Janis: 'less you're gonna film it for me Jimmy: he couldn't throw a punch if you 💰 him, rich girl Jimmy: but if some dickhead gives him a smack, I'll obvs get my 📷 out Janis: maybe I will Janis: make it worth him coming down Jimmy: 👍 Janis: what's 👎 Jimmy: what kind of question's that? Janis: what do you mean Jimmy: what I said Janis: are you actually worried about her Jimmy: shut up Janis: fuck off telling me to shut up Janis: you know she's just carrying on the party somewhere else Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: fine Janis: be a dick Jimmy: lasses first Janis: what, 'cos I'm not gonna freak out over wherever Asia is sucking dick and getting more white-girl wasted Jimmy: just leave it out Janis: have fun with that then Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: 👌 Janis: had no idea you were such an amateur Jimmy: Piss off Janis: really Janis: see if Mia needs anything whilst you're at it, like Jimmy: yeah alright Janis: 👌 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: if you're lucky Janis: depends if you're personally gonna check every tent Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: I'm not, you're being a mug Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: idc, and you clearly love it Jimmy: obvs Jimmy: living laughing loving, me Jimmy: having a top time with my #lad BFF Janis: you fit right in, how many times can I say it Jimmy: as many times as you like Jimmy: wouldn't wanna piss on your parade Janis: yeah Janis: so considerate and caring Jimmy: I get it, you're gutted I'm not a massive bastard Jimmy: bit busy rn but I'll dry your eyes when I get back Janis: 'cos that makes sense Janis: don't bother, I don't need you Jimmy: don't bother to start talking sense now, you've been going on ages without any Janis: if you're so busy, then you don't have time to come at me with all this bullshit Jimmy: too right Jimmy: nowt left that needs to be said any road, you've well covered it Janis: yep Janis: go away now Jimmy: [does for ages because obvs they don't find Asia til the AM/way later we know and her bf is fuming and there's DRAMA and nobody notices that Jimothy is struggling with all this] Janis: [when you've just been here alone with nothing to do and no updates so you're casually fuming at all this] Jimmy: [just goes back into their tent because bye everyone he's so over y'all] Janis: [just lowkey shouting at them all to stfu with this bullshit now so he can get some peace] Jimmy: [get in your tent and sleep it off you hot messes] Janis: [just sat outside 'cos you aren't about to go in either tent like thanks so much for this gals] Jimmy: [just throwing a hoodie or whatever at her through the tent flap cos you know she's out there and it's been raining] Janis: [tapping the tent to say thanks 'cos you aren't gonna actually say it] Jimmy: [when you know they just sat on either side of this tent opening so casually how romeo and juliet of you] Janis: [the accidental drama of it all] Jimmy: [get drunker yourself boy that'll help SO MUCH honestly] Janis: [oh no no] Jimmy: [full of good ideas jimothy is] Janis: [when you just wanna go so bad but can't 'cos Asia's fucked that for you] Jimmy: [Oh Asia] Janis: [just picking up the shit they left outside and fucking it up/throwing it/losing it] Jimmy: [I don't blame you babe, go off] Janis: [gotta do something yo] Jimmy: [I'm just gonna leave him in here marding, much less productive] Janis: I'm going for a walk alright Jimmy: Alright Janis: you need anything? Jimmy: Like what? Janis: Shoes, is a good one Janis: more bottles, less likely but maybe Jimmy: I don't need owt off you Janis: alright Janis: your loss Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: have my 😭 when you've gone Janis: no thanks Jimmy: on you go then Janis: weren't waiting on your permission Jimmy: weren't giving it Janis: just keep the search party away and it doesn't matter either way Jimmy: not your bodyguard Jimmy: or theirs Janis: yeah sure Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: meaning tell yourself that then Jimmy: fuck you Janis: wow Jimmy: find someone else to take the piss out of while you're out and about Janis: I'm not the one that's taking the piss out of you Jimmy: bollocks Janis: No, not bollocks Janis: have I had you running 'round this entire place after me Janis: no Jimmy: I'd go looking for you whether or not you reckon it makes me a twat Janis: it makes you a twat for them Jimmy: she's an fucking idiot Jimmy: not gonna just leave her Janis: She's managed to keep herself alive just fine 'til now Janis: how is it your job Jimmy: what so I'm a knobhead when I'm not on the clock? Jimmy: tah Janis: oh whatever Janis: I can't be bothered with this Jimmy: Why do you care if I look for her for a bit or not? Janis: I don't Janis: the question is why do you care Jimmy: It's what we're here for, for a start Jimmy: fake nice Jimmy: not that you can be bothered Janis: bullshit Janis: it's not fake, and even if it were, they're all too plastered to care or remember Jimmy: And what? Jimmy: You're jealous of her now Janis: get real Jimmy: you Janis: I am Janis: and I told you, this whole nice guy thing Janis: can't be bothered Jimmy: her boyfriend's at a loose end, crack on Jimmy: he's well more your type Janis: yeah you wish Jimmy: weren't a request Jimmy: I'm actually alright for threesomes as it goes Janis: and I'm alright without them or any of their sloppy seconds so piss off Jimmy: night then Janis: good chat Jimmy: won't get any 🏆 or owt but whatever Janis: I'll cope Jimmy: I'll live an' all Jimmy: 💔 to hear it, I know Janis: yeah Janis: 'cos if you ain't a 👼 you're that dick Janis: no inbetween Jimmy: it's you who's trying to shove a label on my head, when you ain't chucking me in a reusable coffee cup with them that is Janis: What are you trying to prove Jimmy: What are you on about? Jimmy: she's gone, I had a look for her 'cause her mates are too pissed, nowt else Janis: 👌 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: just go to bed Jimmy: you ain't put any more work into being my step mum Jimmy: let that dream 💀💀💀 Janet Janis: You're so funny Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Janis: 🤐 then Jimmy: piss off with telling me what to do Janis: you're annoying Jimmy: yeah and you being a dickhead'll stop me Jimmy: good one Janis: what will Janis: seriously Jimmy: [stops replying like fine if that's how you want it seriously] Janis: [let's give you both a break] Jimmy: [we should say it's later and he's drunker and he's wandering around looking for her but in a more chill way than the flatwhites earlier so we're not waking half the campsite] Janis: [whereas she has been 'cos AM so nowt still officially on but people carrying on so she can be coming back] Jimmy: [awkwardly bumping into each other like] Janis: [literally 'cos can't straight up ignore him so just looking like oh, it's you] Jimmy: [looking at her like where the fuck have you been cos will never say it] Janis: ['I can't sit still'] Jimmy: ['I can't sleep'] Janis: ['why?'] Jimmy: [shrugs because so many reasons] Janis: [nods like #relatable] Jimmy: [nods like okay now I know you're alright I'll fuck off] Janis: [just looking at him like seriously 'this is stupid now'] Jimmy: [looking at her like it's been stupid this whole time] Janis: [walking alongside him like where are we going then 'cos you aren't just leaving] Jimmy: [god knows where they are actually going but he's sneaking looks at her with every step honey] Janis: [if you see it's 'cos you are too so can't say anything] Jimmy: ['I don't get why you're fuming at me' cos drunk enough we can just say it] Janis: [when you didn't take a bottle so you aren't at that level so you're more awkward but like alright, we're doing this, shrugs 'cos doesn't fully get it herself that's the tea 'I don't get what you really want'] Jimmy: ['from what?'] Janis: ['from-' gestures at herself then around them '-any of this, all of it, I knew, and then it changed, then I thought I knew again but then you do something or say something and I'm back at the start'] Jimmy: ['what did I do or say?'] Janis: [a look like, loads of stuff 'I've got to remind you?' and tapping his head and then the bottle like pisshead] Jimmy: ['I just mean-' stopping himself cos do you even know what you mean rn] Janis: [a sigh like fuck it, why not, 'cos he might not remember and tbh over the weirdness and tension so may as well 'you say you want me but then you trail after her for ages' shrugs 'we could've had fun instead'] Jimmy: ['it weren't like that' trying so hard not to owt all his secrets rn casually 'she could've been any of 'em' shakes his head at himself like he's remembering who they actually are 'except Mia, fuck her'] Janis: [lil 😏 but not committing to it 'cos still too awks and gah on this 'I know, do I have to be fair and logical about it though? Not good like you, fuck her'] Jimmy: ['I weren't thinking proper about it, you know what I'm like, full Shakespearean tragedy or nowt' shrugs like it's all such bants and it's so fine but he's obvs worried] Janis: ['You're just a nice person' shrugs like obviously, we're not here to debate that 'but-' making an actual ugh noise out loud 'cos can't believe you thinking like this, never mind saying it '-you say it's different with me, yeah? But you'd do that for anyone, and you just lump me in with them, like, how is it different...' looking away 'cos so mad at yourself and shamed] Jimmy: ['I've never lumped you in with them, that were you doing it to me' stops and looks at her 'you are different, from every other paddy dickhead I've met and a fair few northern ones an' all, I'm not just looking for you 'cause you're lost, I wanna be around you loads and I don't wanna be around anyone, even do my own head in, don't I?'] Janis: [not kissing him even though you (clearly) really, really want to, because you've been doing that when you're stopping yourself from saying what you want to but you're finally getting somewhere here and it doesn't feel shit, trying to actually say something in response though, is difficult 'cos OVERWHELMED 'I like you too'] Jimmy: [100% is 😳 and he's so white we all see it okay] Janis: [when he's so cute you gotta at least hug him 'so can we-' pausing 'cos about to say 'go back to how we were' but that's not exactly what you want so you're like umm '- you know, go back to our tent now?'] Jimmy: [hugging her back so hard like don't hurt yourself boy you're still not healed thank you 'we can do owt you want' sounds so casual but he's never meant anything more] Janis: ['I just wanna be with you, as long as it's alone, I don't care where'] Jimmy: [we handholding back to that tent because I don't think we can guarantee alone anywhere else] Janis: [we buzzing but we got some stuff we gotta say still so 'I'm sorry, you know, I was taking the piss a bit'] Jimmy: ['me an' all' because he is also sorry and was also taking the piss 'it does my head in like nowt else, fighting with you'] Janis: ['yeah' 'cos hard same 'it's just how I am with everyone else, it's easier to me than-' when you don't know what this is so we're just trailing off here '- but easier doesn't mean not shit'] Jimmy: ['I get it, all that nice lad bollocks, I get paid for it or get forced into it 'cause I don't want them turning into massive dickheads, like he is, and how I am, off the clock' when you just ranting about your fam casually now 'but I'm still doing the wrong thing for trying to get it right for myself for a bit' shrugs like so what can I do] Janis: [just letting him and listening because you can just about catch up to what he's saying here 'well, we don't have to spend no more time with this lot now and you don't have to fake nice to me, is that a start for some time just for you?'] Jimmy: [holds out the hand she's not holding like pinky promise me gal 'I ain't been faking nowt with you for ages' because tea that we can drunkenly spill] Janis: [does 'this shit is over' gestures towards their tents 'cos we can all see the squad turning to shit without you two needing to be involved 'good, 'cos I'd call you a liar if you said otherwise, I'd know if you were faking that, tah'] Jimmy: [the new dawn new day is gonna be messy for that lot we know 'will piss on their tent for you before we proper draw that line, if you like' because remember when she said he should] Janis: [lols 'so romantic'] Jimmy: [😍 which would seem so fake after she's said that but it's for the lol and how fucking cute she is] Janis: ['not gonna tell you where or where you can't piss, not that kinda fake girlfriend' 😏 'anyway I wrecked loads of their shit earlier so' shrugs like no room to talk] Jimmy: ['I were about to ask what kind you were, but that answers that' 😏 gives her the 🚬 from behind his ear like you a bad bitch I see] Janis: ['you've asked me that one before, only on special occasions, alright' loling again 'where are your sunglasses, like?'] Jimmy: [touches the top of his head like a nerd like nope they not there, looks down to see if they're on his top and pats his pockets, doing a more and more pouty face the longer the search goes on and he doesn't 'find' them] Janis: ['how do I even know it's the real you, honestly' then gasps dramatically like OMG 'Jamie?!' and being so 😍] Jimmy: [lols 'top news that some good'll come out of how our kid is probably scratching knobhead into 'em with her compass instead of doing her maths'] Janis: ['it's a look, sure you can style it out'] Jimmy: ['duh' in such a flat white voice] Janis: [shudders like #triggered 'don't, they're finally asleep and not annoying me'] Jimmy: [pretends like he's gonna shout slags but only whispers it cos doesn't want them to wake up either] Janis: ['far as dirty talk goes...' but is 😍 can't lie] Jimmy: [gets his empty bottle from earlier and spins it then kisses her really hardcore like it's a pisstake of how the flatwhites hook up but also a shameless excuse] Janis: [have at it kids, you've been waiting for ages by your standards] Jimmy: [I wanna volunteer that this is the first time he calls her baby not as a pisstake because drunk enough that he accidentally could do] Janis: [yas, here for that] Jimmy: [we crossing lines today] Janis: [and it feels so good] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [step back homewrecker] Jimmy: [I'm so mad at her like yeah he's hot af but who do you think you are, this is not a James and Ava situation thank you] Janis: [lucky you ain't getting brawled tbh] Jimmy: [would love that] Janis: [we tryna be mature and show our feels in a better way though, tragically] Jimmy: [she isn't worth it anyways lbr like he's not even interested] Janis: [and they'll be done with community service soon they wouldn't have got that long so bye] Jimmy: [let the door hit you on your way out] Jimmy: [imagine their cute little disorientated sleepy faces though and how snuggled they'd be] Janis: [getting woken up by shouting is so confusing like 'scuse me hello???] Jimmy: [and once again lowkey triggering for my soft son] Janis: [we just staying snuggled 'til we work out what's going on and even then we ain't getting involved honey, just making a face like, called that] Jimmy: ['I've changed my mind, don't bother fucking him' we joking but we're also not because the voice is soft] Janis: [pushing his body with yours from a sleeping position, so also gently 'no scaly #kinkunlocked, idiot'] Jimmy: [pulling her closer again nbd] Janis: ['poor boy though, don't think it's even a record of shortest relationship for her' snuggling in harder without thinking about it 'cos they being so loud about their 💔 rn] Jimmy: [stroking her hair because it's comforting for them both 'do you wanna go get breakfast?' tea makes everything better that's facts] Janis: [#facts, nods 'they'll need to keep their energy up and all' 'cos remembering to be fake nice more whilst you're still here also the idea of throwing a sandwich at them like there you are is amusing her greatly] Jimmy: [we'll never know what amazing shade he was gonna reply with because a massive yawn instead cos you know they ain't had hardly any sleep] Janis: [Awh'ing at him, genuinely, and closing his eyes with her fingers like go back to sleep 'I'll find some earplugs for you, sleepy baby'] Jimmy: [holding onto her like DON'T GO without thinking about it] Janis: [is not going, just looking at him 'you shouldn't be allowed to look like that in the morning'] Jimmy: ['gotta keep up with you, girl' morning 😍] Janis: ['you don't have to try' the multiple meanings, love that] Jimmy: [does an IRL 🤏 like I do a bit] Janis: ['but I'm SUCH an athlete' 😏] Jimmy: ['help me up then' cos determined to get tea but would need help up cos those tricky ribs sleeping on the ground isn't really the one] Janis: [not to mention all the extra activities y'all have been getting up to on the ground, but helps him up, lol at them just scooting past like don't mind us you two] Jimmy: [god imagine, at least you can pretend you're wincing at that scene and the drama boy] Janis: [obvs notices 'you need another massage' looks about as they walking 'they probably have a tent here, like' 'cos the random hippie crap they do at festivals now be wild] Jimmy: [yeah even at small local ones like you know this is, the gimmicks be cray 'depends'] Janis: ['go on'] Jimmy: [draws two lines on her back like are you keeping a tally of how many I'll owe you or not] Janis: [shakes her head like nah 'I don't need nothing, besides, basically helping me with my homework so'] Jimmy: [draws the 🤓 in the same place but under whatever top she's wearing rn so it's against skin because harder to work out what he's drawing that's his excuse anyway lol] Janis: [has no idea what that was, the confusion and lol like boy what but also being like 'do it again' 'cos you want him to heheheh] Jimmy: [obvs does do it again slower like let's make this a moment] Janis: [so faux offended when she works it out 'shut up, I just like touching you'] Jimmy: ['gutted how I'd rate you don't actually count for nowt' cos she'd get that A+ honey] Janis: ['well you can tell Mr Joyce how good I am if you want but he'll just swear up and down he's NEVER made us massage each other for our mark, like'] Jimmy: ['til Mr Lucas comes through with the hours of footage, dickhead can't deny it then'] Janis: [loling 'dread to think what they have you do for art, babe'] Jimmy: ['yeah it's a proper laugh a minute, like' making a face because lord the bollocks he would have to do all jokes aside] Janis: ['he is an excellent life model though, be fair' the fakest wistful 😍 for Mr Lucas] Jimmy: ['that'll be why my dad put that one on the fridge' what a lovely mental image 'nowt to do with my talents'] Janis: [loling 'I'll try not to be offended he don't wanna look at me every day instead'] Jimmy: ['he does but can't be letting our kid get inspired by you an' all' mimes drawing a moustache and some devil horns on her even though we know Cass would probably do worse 'you're my muse' casually saying that like you're mine, we know] Janis: ['fair' 'cos we get it, dealt with a lot of siblings and a lot of siblings gf/bfs but not and never dealing with that so we coming at it with bants 'how much do muses get paid then, 50, 60?'] Jimmy: [IRL 🤔 winnie like he's so seriously considering for ages but then shrugs 'I gotta stay poor and you gotta stay rich' when you just saying you gonna give her all your money bye] Janis: ['gotta stay on brand, I get it' looking at the food trucks and tents like 🤔 Winnie herself 'they'll all bankrupt ya but may as well enjoy it'] Jimmy: [just 😍 so hard what is she even saying he don't know] Janis: [squishing his face like focus boy but you ain't mad, just getting in people's way, again, at least most people won't be up until the music starts again] Jimmy: [we know you there somewhere though with your coffee and your camera, community service gal] Janis: [ugh, have a tea you scumbag] Jimmy: [that's how you know they ain't #fated] Janis: [mhmm, she'd probably put the milk in first] Jimmy: [they only gonna talk about 📷 when they do see her cos only thing they have in common and all he's bothered about hearing from her] Janis: [like take a hint, it's not what you think it is, are you a flat white] Jimmy: [like I'M SORRY even when he's talking to you he's gonna be touching the bae so much unless she literally leaves, get a grip] Janis: [it's shameless, have you even talked to Janis or tried to] Jimmy: [blatantly scared of her aren't you babe] Janis: [like she hate you now but you know, not without reason, she'd definitely wanna leave but would probably stand her ground 'cos why should you just get to talk to him, be polite, madam, you can't] Jimmy: [1. even Grace was more subtle when she was leaving half the shit she owns at the CG 2.he don't wanna talk to you hun he don't wanna talk to anyone but her so excuse you 3. he blatantly would make NO indication that he wants Janis to leave hence holding her hand still/touching her all the time without even being aware of it really and like showing her the pics too/trying to include her in the convo like I should take a pic of you like this etc] Janis: [seriously, like this is so awkward and it's all your fault, probably in community service 'cos some girl scrapped with you 'cos you tryna steal her man] Jimmy: [go and hoe on pete he'd be about it, except don't cos he's too good for you too] Janis: [my boo says stay away, we aren't having you in the squad honey] Jimmy: [I like to think she finally makes her excuses/has some friends to get back to but like I said we all been knew she gonna try and chat to him in his DMs and get him to hang with them all later like a snek] Janis: [mhmm, we see you, hoe, also thanks for making this so awks now] Jimmy: [Jimothy just like 'bit weird she were here' cos boys are oblivious] Janis: ['is it?'] Jimmy: [a look like umm yeah? because he genuinely thinks it's a coincidence, oh boy] Janis: [shrugs 'small world, smaller town'] Jimmy: [shrugs back because he's already forgotten her and that's the tea, casually heading back to see what state the flat white drama has reached] Janis: [meanwhile we'll just be angsting don't mind us] Jimmy: [when you know she's quiet and it's different but you think she just doesn't wanna see the flat whites and is tired like you are so you just squeeze her hand like it's okay] Janis: [just the fakest smile, one that looks like a grimace, they're probably at the comforting stage so leave them to be extra about it, breathing out like 'thank fuck' Jimmy: [I like to think Grace shoots Janis a tiny look that nobody else sees like please kill me because so over it 5eva] Janis: [just 😏 and silently like good luck with that] Jimmy: [please can we say that when jimothy and community service girl cross paths again later Grace sees them and 'accidentally' does something to fuck with her like spill a drink on her/her camera whatever cos she's that clumsy bitch but she's also jj's biggest shipper on the low and it's never gonna get back to Janis but #defense squad regardless] Janis: [100% here for that] Jimmy: [she's a hoe and she 👀 you gal] Janis: [when you're that unsubtle] Jimmy: [for now though enjoy Asia crying too loud guys] Janis: [just having your breakfast in your tent like isn't this fun lmao] Jimmy: [getting his headphones and giving her one cos he's put on songs he knows she like because a babe] Janis: [literally anything over the sound of that lot] Jimmy: [you know they wireless cos it's the future so he doesn't have to sit as close as he is] Janis: [just looking at him silently saying as much but turning it into #bants like you think he's tryna steal your food like get off] Jimmy: [does steal some cos that bitch and it's all #bants and we're all fine] Janis: ['fat bitch' in a flat white impression] Jimmy: [dramatic OTT 😱] Jimmy: stop trying to make me 😭 an' all Jimmy: be rude to take the 🏆 Janis: they're pros at 😭 if nothing else Janis: don't be so cocky Jimmy: and I'm not? Jimmy: had the 🎻🎻 out when I came out my mum, ain't stopped since, tah Janis: that's 'cos you're the first child Jimmy: she weren't chuffed about none of us Jimmy: not special, me Janis: still, you get away with more by default Janis: even if it's just 'cos they're green Jimmy: yeah get away with loads Jimmy: be why I'm in community service Janis: amateur Janis: if you turned on the waterworks, might not have happened Jimmy: that's on Bill's 👻 only floating about when I don't need him Jimmy: your fault an' all though, meant to be #inspiring Janis: yeah well, you're welcome Jimmy: when you're not tucking into any grub, might be Janis: now you're calling me fat? Janis: get your own insults Jimmy: calling you territorial if owt 😾 Janis: you got your own, dickhead Jimmy: maybe I like yours better Jimmy: [a LOOK] Janis: [😳] Janis: shut up 🙄😏 Jimmy: [does the whole what charade like he can't hear her even though they are typing] Janis: [🖕] Janis: not getting 'round me that easy Jimmy: it's alright, not scared of hard work, as well you know Janis: yeah yeah Janis: ⌚💕 Jimmy: [throws something at her but like a pillow because he's like be nice to me not fight me] Janis: [😒 'oi!'] Jimmy: ['Oi you' but softer] Janis: [taking said pillow and laying down like I'm exhausted, 'scuse me, which is true but you just can't] Jimmy: [you 100% know he's gonna lay down and spoon her like okay then] Janis: [allowing it 'cos you want it and you're trying not to let a hoe ruin shit for you 'cos ultimately you ruin things for yourself if that ain't a mood and you're just fighting all your instincts to not rn] Jimmy: [just having that moment even though we know it's not comfy for you on the ground because you wanna snuggle her more than you care about yourself] Janis: [and we know neither of you is sleeping but this beats interacting with the flatwhites at least] Jimmy: [you can blatantly hear his heartbeat in between songs gal you know he's not] Janis: [turning to look at him and frowning 'cos he looks as uncomfortable as he is 'you need your massage now' and putting him on his back] Jimmy: [shamelessly so into it when she's doing power moves like that] Janis: [when this keeps your hands and mind busy so you can just get into it and forget about that hoe for a hot sec and try to make him feel better] Jimmy: ['it weren't this bad before' when you've accidentally outted that this isn't the first time this has happened so you're like hope she's focused enough to not question me] Janis: [when he would've tensed when he realized what he'd said so you definitely took notice, as if you weren't anyway, but it does give you indication to not freak out, again, as if you would 'you probably had fractures and injuries, but smaller, repeat injuries in the same place lead to smaller cracks making bigger breaks and giving you longer healing time overall' shrugging like it's that casual 'plus, you're well old now, yeah? muscle and bone don't repair like it used to, granddad'] Jimmy: ['One foot in the grave, me, just waiting for you to get in' because we can always hide behind #bants] Janis: ['no pressure, like' shaking her head like 😏 'worse than a proposal'] Jimmy: ['might be worse than the proposal they pissed on, give you that, Jules' saying that like you're gonna do a better one] Janis: ['be serious, if you distract me I might break another bone and fuck taking the blame for someone else's handiwork and all'] Jimmy: 'Alright, well that there's a seriously good angle for you' mhmm on top of you we know what you're saying and mimes a 📷 like he's taking a pic of her cos that's his handiwork] Janis: [when you're into it and wanna be more into it but 📷 triggers you so you gotta brush him off like oh please 'I'm a professional'] Jimmy: [when you're gonna agree/give her another compliment but you don't have to say anything because a NOISE happens instead because that's how good she is at this] Janis: ['even when you make that very hard' 'cos fuuuck boy 😍] Jimmy: [giving her a LOOK because she's making it very hard for him to even function rn on every level] Janis: ['you deserve it' whispering this when you're inches from his face 'cos massaging his neck and shoulders] Jimmy: ['because?' also whispering and leaning in even more] Janis: ['because...' getting so close that when you talk, your lips touch his and he can feel how hard you're breathing and the heat 'you know exactly what you do to me'] Jimmy: ['because I need you' cos he's not said that yet and we know it's the truest thing and we're all dying because he's as close rn still cos there's never any chill] Janis: [such a noise 'cos not what you were expecting him to say but exactly what you wanted to hear and didn't even know how much that you cannot deal 'if you're lying, I will kill you' Jimmy: ['you'll have to kill me 'cause I'm not' when he's literally saying break my heart bitch idc like he's Peter from all the boys excuse you sir] Janis: ['I won't hurt you' like all the meaning and intention behind that because she hurts everyone else in her life very much on purpose so even to promise to try, bye] Jimmy: [gotta kiss her because we can't even like soz I know we're trying to communicate better but] Janis: [it is needed] Jimmy: [let them have it, they've done loads of meaningful chatting by their standards] Janis: [and the gals should've pissed off to get ready by now] Jimmy: [100% hope they can hear you though because payback is a bitch and so are all y'all] Janis: [same like they better but you two don't need to think about that] Jimmy: [it's okay we know it's not intentional like the fake dating days you're just loud af] Janis: [same like they better but you two don't need to think about that Janis: [Asia gonna have a meltdown lol] Jimmy: [And Mia cos she only just got rid of the band boys and now she has to be reminded yet again that lads exist other than her father] Janis: [so gutted harry isn't here so you can use him, also omg she's like bffs w matty from skins so she should end up going out with him] Jimmy: [she's the only one gutted he's not here] Janis: [mhmm] Jimmy: [also Grace is the only one who is allowed to be like NOPE over hearing anything cos that's her sister the rest of y'all can calm down] Janis: [like you ain't hoeing when it suits lol] Jimmy: [jj are in LOVE bye] Janis: [we already got one hussy tryna ruin it, y'all can stay in your own tent tah] Jimmy: [oh what a fun tent that would be] Janis: [at least this will probably make your giggle 'cos you're 12, welcome for the mood boost] Jimmy: [honestly grow the fuck up gals] Janis: [immediately like shh Asia, so they can get back to Mia's fave topic, JJ] Jimmy: [Grace just wants to LEAVE RN IMMEDIATELY but she can't cos where would go you even go gal #coffeehunting oh Sammi] Janis: [just put some headphones in, it'll piss off Mia but what doesn't, just means they can bitch literally behind your back knowing you can defs still hear] Jimmy: [100% the mood well enjoy looking a state all of y'all cos Grace is good at makeup for all her many other flaws and she's not gonna do none of yours now soz not soz] Janis: [you know the day #2 looks are not gonna be as popping, we've all been taken down a notch/to reality here] Jimmy: [not that any of you were serving on day 1] Janis: [well no but less glitter and feathers today I feel] Jimmy: [we should say the 🌧 is worse too just to really rub salt in] Janis: [it probably would be, and muddy festival is the vibe for everyone else just not y'all] Jimmy: [like you live in Ireland not Ibiza deal with it] Janis: [you should not be surprised at this point like hellur] Jimmy: [what do we wanna do next?] Janis: [well his phone needs to be blowing up on the sly once they're remotely paying attention to anything else again] Jimmy: [yeah they're probably trying to get a snuggly little nap in as well how rude] Janis: [when his phone always blows up low-key and obvs you've always wanted to know but not your place but I feel like he'd act different somehow from when it's just basic DMs or fam so she's like oh but obvs still saying nothing] Jimmy: [I had the most heartbreaking mental image of him smiling or loling at his phone and I'm like WHAT ARE YOU SAYING YOU HUSSY] Janis: [just like brb need something from their tent like you ever do 'cos gotta go] Jimmy: [when that doesn't strike you as weird because you too busy reading whatever bs this gal is all up in your inbox with boy no] Janis: [asking grace to do your makeup so you've got an excuse to be an age] Jimmy: [when she'd be so ???!! because when does that ever happen but she's not gonna say anything like what's wrong in front of the others] Janis: [we sitting there in silence like mia don't start] Jimmy: [she'd be so annoyed so a big part of Grace would be thinking that's why Janis asked because she did promise she'd annoy Mia whoever she can but she's not stupid so she knows its not just that hence her revenge against community service girl later because even if that's not it, it's not helping and that's her sister you hoe] Janis: [just like well you must be having a great chat, Jimothy, don't even care where I am or what I'm doing, great] Jimmy: [that said I am gonna have him hit her up like ? when it's been ages so I'll do that rn] Jimmy: Alright? Janis: 👍 Janis: party never stops Jimmy: you're still next door then? Janis: yep Janis: 💄💅💇 takes time Jimmy: if you get ✨ in my sleeping bag I'm dumping you Jimmy: you would look 🥇 wearing 🌹 in your hair though Jimmy: proper renaissance verona #aesthetic I reckon Jimmy: Bill will be well chuffed Janis: don't think that's the era we're bringing back here Janis: but yeah, give her your notes Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: UGH won't bother asking her to do me next Janis: you're not invited Janis: 💔 Jimmy: bit rude Janis: they are Jimmy: but they can't stop me nipping round to borrow a cup of sugar or whatever bollocks good neighbours are supposed to let you have Janis: oh yeah Janis: dead likely to have sugar Janis: ask about carbs whilst you're getting kicked out Jimmy: hair straighteners then Jimmy: the what don't matter Janis: you won't be able to breathe for hairspray Janis: go enjoy the delightful weather Jimmy: how long are you gonna be? Janis: depends Jimmy: on what? Jimmy: how decent the setting spray is? Janis: no, how much you keep chatting Janis: and why do you know what setting spray is Jimmy: I'll call you then, you can put me on speaker Jimmy: and 'cause I've had a girlfriend before Janis: never hear you over them and their 'music' Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: I get it, you're being tortured Jimmy: but I can save you Janis: I won't be that long Janis: no need for heroics or dramatics, boy Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: just every need for you to have Bill turning in his ⚰ with that blasphemy, yeah? Janis: he's your imaginary friend more than he is mine 👻💕 Jimmy: so you don't want custody when we break up? 👻💔 Janis: you're alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [some time] Janis: you good to go? Jimmy: depends Janis: ? Jimmy: 1. where 2. who with 3. what have they done to you Janis: 1. mainstage 2. who do you think and who did you have in mind 3. dramatic, sure she's put a selfie up by now Jimmy: 1. if I have to 2. you and not them 3. stop saying that like it's a bad thing, dickhead Janis: 1. sure you can convince the alternative act in the 2nd tent is gonna be more fun 2. I'll be there and all 3. soz, it's so wonderful I 💗 it Jimmy: alright Janis: 👌 Janis: [squad rolling out, at least you wouldn't have let Grace go cray with your look so you aren't looking a state, not the mood here ty] Jimmy: [she gonna look good Grace knows what she's doing and Jimothy gonna notice so hard bye] Janis: [ah the awks of treating this like a mission like you need to be up front or something like you suddenly care] Jimmy: [the joys of how much he doesn't know what's going on so he's just being their normal] Janis: [oh boy, meanwhile we getting on it hard, like thanks for the drinks, strangers, we do not care] Jimmy: [like that's registering with him but as per he just thinks she's over the flat whites cos hard same for him always] Janis: [it's a good cover honestly] Jimmy: [and we know he's getting on it too because still got that fam drama and guilt that only gets worse the longer he's away] Janis: [we're just partying, this is casual] Jimmy: [I just imagine Grace like 👀 at them both lowkey trying to work out why the vibe's off cos she don't know yet] Janis: [try and be subtle gal, she will not be happy lol] Jimmy: [contrary to popular belief she can do subtle lol] Janis: [the front was a mistake 'cos obvs community service will be there for the photos] Jimmy: [we see you giving him the eye gal even if he hasn't noticed] Janis: [you're 'working' focus] Jimmy: [literally though and more importantly if you're gonna look then see his blatant 😍 for his bae cos she looks good as hell thank you] Janis: [heading out for a piss, like we all know you aren't finding your way back through a crowd for time/if ever] Jimmy: ? Janis: 🚽 Janis: doing it in a bottle and lobbing it isn't an option for the fairer sex Jimmy: 🎻💔🎻 Janis: real tragedy, yeah Jimmy: would've come with you, that is Janis: told you the trick now, you don't need to Janis: keep 🕺🙌🎉 Jimmy: my turn to get tortured now? Janis: don't seem like it Janis: music ain't up to much but you know Janis: all things considered Jimmy: I'd have rather had the contouring done Jimmy: said as much Janis: 🙄 Janis: you don't need contouring, I need a piss Jimmy: what's your sister's problem? Jimmy: keeps 👀 it's weird Janis: fancies you still, obviously Jimmy: so funny you Janis: who's joking Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: she's been all over that dickhead with the 🍕 and 🎸 til a bit ago Janis: so? Janis: 💔 you ain't her one and only Jimmy: obvs yeah Janis: she ain't fussy Jimmy: makes one of us that does Janis: ha Janis: alright Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I'm well fussy, me Janis: you picked her so not fussy enough it's gonna get in the way Jimmy: what? Janis: what do you mean what Janis: only so many ways to say that Jimmy: What are you saying it for? Jimmy: that were a game and it were ages ago Janis: alright, ignore it then Janis: joke fit Jimmy: Nah, how about you answer me Janis: I did Janis: joke Jimmy: 👌 Janis: 🤣👮 Jimmy: alright, shut up Jimmy: that don't make it funnier Janis: gutted Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: such a 🥇 taste in humour, you Jimmy: I'm northern, we're #blessed there's owt at all Janis: meant to give you a sense of humour along with the chip on your shoulder Jimmy: is it? Janis: yep Jimmy: go on and @ my dad with what a disappointment I am there Jimmy: been running a tally for ages Janis: write it down yourself and get a routine going Jimmy: to have no dickhead 🤣? you're alright Jimmy: got that already without putting 🖋 to paper Janis: got your fans Janis: taste not necessary Jimmy: Tah Janis: any time Jimmy: 👍 Janis: less typing more dancing, dickhead Jimmy: I don't have any dickhead to dance with Janis: yeah you do Jimmy: nah Janis: there's a crowd Janis: last I checked Janis: 'less everyone's pissed off Jimmy: 🤞🖤 Janis: yeah Janis: that's the spirit Janis: dance like no one's watching, probably got that on a shirt Jimmy: the tall one 100% has Janis: irony lost on them as well as sarcasm Jimmy: real tragedy that Janis: not as tragic as her dancing Jimmy: nowt could be Janis: not seen my sister;s Janis: don't tell her, she'll be devvo Jimmy: 👀 it now Jimmy: hang on, I'll shout her Janis: go ahead Jimmy: better trained than my 🐕 her Jimmy: comes right when you say her name Janis: fuck off Jimmy: what? Janis: not funny Jimmy: is a bit Jimmy: you'd know if you were here Janis: glad I'm missing out Jimmy: I get it, you must've seen her 😭 loads Janis: duh Jimmy: you've been ages Janis: 🚽👮 now too are we Jimmy: would obvs go towards ✔ my #ultimate kink Janis: recommend the portaloos then Janis: sights and smells 10/10 on that score Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: gotta queue obvs Janis: not the only pervert around Jimmy: just the 🥇 Janis: prove it Jimmy: go on Jimmy: what do you want me to do? Janis: you've got the sick 🧠 Janis: why have I got to think of the task Jimmy: you set the challenge Jimmy: come on, don't be 🙀 Janis: I'm not Jimmy: tell me then Jimmy: ⏲💪🏆 Janis: I dunno Janis: not gonna make you do anything you don't wanna do, am I Jimmy: how do you know I don't wanna? Jimmy: do owt to prove myself, me Jimmy: I ain't scared Janis: well if you do wanna then you can just do it Janis: I cba to facilitate that Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: call me what you want Jimmy: Hey, what's wrong? Jimmy: I'm only pissing about Janis: good for you Janis: I'm fine, bored of this shit Jimmy: we can leave them to it for a bit, when you come back Janis: I'm already back at the tent Jimmy: Alright, hang on Janis: you don't need to Jimmy: Do you not want me to or what? Janis: I'm just going sleep so you may as well stay there Jimmy: that weren't what I asked Janis: stop asking questions Janis: I'm fucked Jimmy: fucked how? Jimmy: that can be the last one Janis: how you think Janis: 🍻🍹🥃 Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: you're not Janis: yeah I am Janis: how'd you know Jimmy: we're 🗨 Jimmy: and I've 👀 you pissed before Janis: Autocorrect pretty sound Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I'll be there in a sec Janis: fine Janis: do what you like Jimmy: Why are you fuming at me? Jimmy: I just wanna check you're alright Janis: yeah, make it sound like an obligation Janis: I said I was going kip, not lying in a pool of my own sick Jimmy: calm down Janis: just stop, alright Jimmy: What, giving a shit about you? Jimmy: No Janis: being so Janis: you know Jimmy: bollocks do I Janis: just stop Jimmy: you Jimmy: stop saying that Jimmy: I haven't done nowt Janis: stop talking Janis: I wanna go to sleep Jimmy: properly talk to me Jimmy: how about that? Janis: No Janis: I've got nothing to say right now Jimmy: why? Jimmy: it don't make sense Janis: if it don't to you that ain't my problem, alright Jimmy: what the fuck does that mean? Janis: that if you're that oblivious then there's nothing I can do about it Jimmy: to what? Janis: now you're just trying to piss me off Jimmy: now you're just being a twat Janis: then leave me alone Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: if you're so bothered Jimmy: I don't get this Jimmy: you Janis: yeah Jimmy: What kind of answer is that? Jimmy: and you say I'm a headfuck Janis: you expect me to sit and explain myself Jimmy: why not? Janis: 'cos what kind of fucking question is that Jimmy: a valid one Jimmy: what's changed, when the fuck did it? Jimmy: there's some others Janis: I don't want to do this right now Jimmy: me an' all but you come out of their tent and you're a different lass Janis: called a makeover Jimmy: it ain't about what's been put on your face Jimmy: sort your head out Janis: don't fucking tell me to sort my head out Janis: who the fuck are you to Jimmy: Or what? Jimmy: great question though, babe, who the fuck am I? Jimmy: some mug again, do you reckon? Janis: Yeah, or what me too, that'll help Jimmy: Go on, what would? Jimmy: I don't need this bollocks from you Janis: How many times have I told you to leave it and go away Janis: if you don't need it, there's your solution Jimmy: how many times have you said you give a shit? Jimmy: words or no words Jimmy: so we're here for a second go, what's changed? Janis: well you say a lot of shit too Jimmy: is that it? Jimmy: what did I say? Janis: No Janis: you say shit that you then prove you don't actually mean Jimmy: like? Janis: you should know Janis: not make me sit here and fucking spell it out like a twat Jimmy: well I don't Janis: then forget about it Janis: you don't have to say anymore bullshit and I won't believe it Jimmy: if that's what you reckon this is, there's nowt I can say Jimmy: come talk to me when you know what the fuck you want me to try and prove Janis: what I reckon is you say all the shit you say to me but literally moments after we've been together you're more concerned messaging someone else and saying shit to them to notice anything about me Jimmy: ? Jimmy: this is about Becca then Janis: Becca, is it Janis: how would I fucking know Jimmy: you spoke to her this morning, maybe that'd be how Janis: no I fucking didn't Janis: and she's never talked to me either Jimmy: I were there Jimmy: yeah you did and yeah she did Janis: Piss off Jimmy: you Jimmy: all of this is about her? Janis: if you're this stupid, happily Jimmy: it's me being stupid? not a chance, mate Janis: It's incredible you ever get laid if this is how bad you are at taking a hint Jimmy: it's even bloody more so that you still can't get your head round this after we've been over it when you had your two previous strops about her Janis: fuck off Jimmy: yeah I will do Jimmy: 'cause what more can I say or do Janis: Try not being a patronizing cunt in the future Jimmy: what future's that? The one where me and Becca run off into the sunset or? Janis: yeah, keep trying Jimmy: yeah, that's what this is, you putting me on trial for nowt Jimmy: it's such bollocks Janis: it's not Janis: you think and respond how you like Jimmy: fuck responding to any of this Jimmy: Asia's ex boyfriend had a better argument than you're bothered with Janis: yeah well if you want to be as much of a cunt as Asia, do it on your own time Jimmy: nearly there according to you, just swap patronising for owt she can spell Jimmy: thick'll work, you've said that one enough Janis: if it fits, have at it Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hypocrite is a great one and all Janis: two-faced, if you wanna stick with their vernacular Jimmy: 'course I do Jimmy: peas in a pod, us Jimmy: another load of bollocks you've stuck with Janis: show me where you ain't and I'd take it back Jimmy: if you need showing, you're more of a headcase than I gave you earlier credit for Jimmy: and I'll give you another 🏆 for it Janis: you want headcase, you had a fight with Harry, I've not fucking touched her Jimmy: neither have I Jimmy: you gonna pretend you've not touched him? Janis: so as long as there's no touching, it don't count Janis: like it's not a strop when you do it Janis: alright, yeah, go along with those rules, sounds fair Jimmy: it's not a strop when it's your ex Jimmy: she's nowt to me Jimmy: neither's your sister Jimmy: neither's Asia Jimmy: Do you want me to go on or what? Janis: he isn't my ex, actually Janis: and she doesn't intend to stay nothing, just because you've not realized doesn't mean I'll sit here and pretend I ain't so you reckon I'm chill Jimmy: call him what you want Jimmy: and her Janis: whatever Janis: you're a fucking hypocrite Jimmy: you're fucking Janis: you've said enough Janis: I'll read it back and make a list Jimmy: you can crack on with that when you've slept it off Jimmy: won't be about distracting you Janis: yeah I don't plan to stick around either Jimmy: 🥇💡 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [well that was a fun time but I don't think there's anything else I can say sadly] Janis: [probably not] Jimmy: [we should 1000% say he gets a lift back with community service girl though cos you know that bitch would offer #keen thank god her friends are also there cos I don't trust you gal] Janis: [yeah she's already hitched a ride in this convo like weren't hanging about, the flat whites will be thrilled] Jimmy: [Grace will be losing her mind] Janis: [soz 'cos we know she's not going home] Jimmy: [literally trying to phone her constantly even though you know she won't answer babe and what are you gonna say if she did anyways] Janis: [fun times] Jimmy: [Cali are gonna be thrilled af] Janis: [like she already weren't coming to the house low-key never mind not coming back to town] Jimmy: [and we said this is near the end of the hols so that makes it worse like school be looming] Janis: [basically] Jimmy: [at least the flatwhites don't know that jj didn't leave together because he's not gonna be hanging around waiting for them to wake up and fill them in on his plans, like Grace will know cos she'll see him with that hoe like we said but she's not telling the squad] Janis: [like you'll know if you get to school and she ain't about but 🤞 lads] Jimmy: [yeah depending how long we drag the angst out but for right now you're still #goals and Mia is fuming about it] Janis: [realistically CS isn't waiting any time to make a move so it wouldn't take long to out] Jimmy: [exactly dr phil and we know they highkey too so] Janis: [bit awks when you gotta be like oh u right but that's the path you chose jimothy] Jimmy: [when you're so focused on the bae that you don't see any other girls trying to get their claws in, oh sir] Janis: [what fun, look forward to that]

[peterstanslizzie]

Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.25 (Facts of Life)

We should give this trio a group name. I mean, Andi Mack has the ‘Good Hair Crew’, which comprises of Andi, Buffy and Cyrus. So, it’s only fitting that we give this group a name. Any ideas?

- Gordo has too many eggs in one basket; On top of having to finish three book reports and a science project, he decided to burden himself even more by joining glee club. This is so he can diversity his school resume with non-academic activities. 

- Side note: It’s cool that the writers acknowledged that Miranda had joined glee club back in episode 1.14 since it was kinda randomly thrown into that episode. 

- Mr. Escobar clearly isn’t impressed with his students’ singing chops and urges them to practice at home. After their glee club session, Lizzie suggests to her friends they should try out for the ‘Fact-athlon’. They don’t think it’s a great idea since Gordo is already under a lot of stress.

Getting a reward is always good motivation

- But when Lizzie brings up the fact that the winners will get a free trip to Miami, the tone suddenly shifts from nay to yay. Plus. this would be a nice addition to Gordo’s already packed resume. 

Bring it on ‘Fact-athlon’!

Preparation

- Lizzie and Miranda are busy studying and quizzing each other History facts in Lizzie’s living room. Gordo arrives and is supposed to bring donuts for his friends but he ate them on the way. That’s literally me lol. 

- Gordo mentions to them that they need to get a faculty advisor for their team. Lizzie suggests a teacher who has a huge head but apparently, Kate has already snatched him; So I guess Kate’s also competiting in the ‘Fact-athlon’. Luckily, Gordo says they have Mrs. Trimmer as their back-up. 

“What does a cannibal call a phonebook? A menu”. I don’t think jokes are Lizzie’s thing lmao.

- The next day in school, Gordo draws up a study plan that recommends 4 hours of studying each day in preparation for the upcoming competition. I have a lot of respect for those who are willing to put themselves through these kind of things, even if it’s all for a prize. 

- We come to find out that Mrs. Trimmer has left the country (for no stated reason...) and Mr. Dig will be replacing her as their advisor for the ‘Fact-athlon’. I think Mr. Dig is great and all but good luck to them lol. I will still give him the benefit of the doubt though. 

Team Lizzie vs Team Kate

- We come to find out later that ‘Team Kate’ comprises of her, Claire and Larry; Smart strategy to rope in Larry. Team Lizzie is about to start their study session with Mr. Dig and they brought in with them every math book they can get their hands on from the school library. 

- But with Mr. Dig, you can’t expect to have a conventional study session with him; The only study tool he’ll be using to teach math is a deck of cards. This doesn’t sit well with Gordo because he feels that they should be studying from books and not from playing blackjack. Gordo and I share the same sentiment on this. 

- But after getting teased by Miranda for being an “old man at 13″, Gordo decides to go along with Mr. Dig’s creative way of teaching Math, Science, English and History. And we then get to see a montage of him doing just that. 

No shade but Team Lizzie is just clowning around whilst Team Kate is actually doing the proper preparation for the ‘Fact-athlon’. Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Dig’s method of teaching by showing is definitely effective but when it comes to a trivia competition, cramming facts into your brain as much as you can in a short period of time is the best strategy. 

Day of the Fact-athlon

Team Kate is getting down to business but as you can see, 2 of the 3 members are a nervous-wreck

VS

Team Lizzie seems confident but maybe a little too confident

- The competition then kicks off with English History and Team Kate is owning Team Lizzie from the get-go. As expected, Team Lizzie doesn’t know all the black and white facts like the dates and names when it comes to historic events. 

- As Team Lizzie continues to get creamed in the ‘Fact-athlon’, Lizzie comes up with a plan to get out of the competition without forfeiting by telling Gordo to fake being sick and asking Miranda to trigger the water sprinklers. They follow the plan accordingly and manage to get themselves out of the embarrassing situation they were in. If I were them, I would be worried about getting punished for doing all of that lol.

I love how Gordo committed to his fake heart-attack though 

- After the whole fainting and water-sprinklers fiasco, Team Lizzie are sitting on the stairwell suffering from their epic defeat. Team Kate rubs in their faces that they’ve lost so badly that Mr. Dig is quitting as a teacher. Yikes! Now things are getting serious.

- The find Mr. Dig packing his things from the classroom and they plead with him not to quit. They tell him that they’ve learned a lot from him and he has shown them that learning can be fun and how seemingly boring subjects like World History can be interesting. Now that’s the ultimate goal of a teacher; To inspire his/her students.

- Also, it turns out that going to Miami wasn’t the best prize for Team Kate:

Kate got bit by sand fleas, Claire stepped on a sea urchin and Larry got extreme sunburn. Wow, they were really unlucky over there.

B-Plot: Matt and Lanny are Starting A Band

- In the kitchen, Matt asks his parents if they have any musical instruments lying around the house that they can borrow. Sam suggests his old guitar he had used when he was in his own band with his cousin and his friend called “Midnight Sam and the Love Patrol”. Matt, Lanny and even Jo don’t seem impressed with this and they even laughed at the idea that he was in a band. 

The song they were playing in this video was actually pretty good. I wonder if it’s an actual song in real life?

- Before I continue, I have always wondered why isn’t Matt in school for majority of these episodes whilst Lizzie is? I know this is a fictional show but it’s a funny pattern I’ve been noticing for quite some time now. 

- Anyways, they are holding auditions to find a third band member in the backyard and Matt’s parents seem to be okay with the idea; They are such chill parents, I can’t. After viewing a bunch of ‘meh’ performances (well I thought that the oboe player was pretty good), they finally get a good audition...from a grown man by the name of Rick Marotta.

This is an adult who wants to be in a band with a couple of kids....I have questions

- I looked up Rick Marotta and he’s legit a big-time drummer in real life! His credits include playing with Linda Ronstadt, James Taylor, Steely Dan, John Lennon (as mentioned in the show) plus Carly Simon, Stevie Nicks and Randy Newman. Woah, impressive! But anyways, he is the best one so far and he gets the gig! Later, they start playing together for the first time and let’s just say, they don’t sound too good.

- It then escalates to the point where Sam and Jo can’t even stand the sound of them playing anymore. It’s cute how they don’t want to disappoint Matt by telling what he can or can’t do but if I were them, I would definitely put my foot down and ask them to stop the ruckus. Like please.

- We fast forward two days later on Sunday and Matt’s band is holding their first ever live performance and I must say; They look stylin’:

And they gave an incredible performance. Bravo! Of course it’s unrealistic for them to get so good after a short period of time but hey, I can definitely let this slide. 

- In the end, however, Matt and Lanny want to move on to another hobby instead of continuing on with their band *facepalms

Overall Thoughts

- I really enjoyed re-watching this episode. They did a great job making an episode that centers around a ‘Fact-athlon’ quite entertaining. Plus, the writing and the dialog used in this episode was really witty. Kudos to Douglas Tuber & Tim Maile for writing this episode. 

- I also like how they showcased the contrast between traditional ways of studying versus interactive/non-conventional ways of studying. Obviously, the former is more effective when it comes to trivia contests/quizzes but the latter makes students enjoy and really soak up what they’re learning. I also have to give props to Arvie Lowe Jr. for doing a great job as Mr. Dig in this particular episode. I loved seeing the bond between him and Lizzie, Gordo and Miranda. Teachers like him are absolutely gold.

- As for Matt and Lanny’s storyline, it was pretty good. I obviously don’t care about it as much as I do with the A-storyline but I definitely have to give them credit for their performance towards the end of the episode; It was great and I also like how Matt/Lanny didn’t annoy me as much as usual lol. 

[tinkdw]

14x01: watching notes / mini meta

This episode is just like one long tick list of previous meta and I love it even if the actual ep itself was slightly bland with a few niggles, the thematics are so exciting for what it means for the show overall and the characters we love. Here’s my watching notes / mini meta short versions of the themes, (previous longer meta’s on each theme are linked with x or underlined sentences). Here we go!

I called the Angel wings, yay!

Opening song: shot down in flames by AC/DC. A song about unrequieted romantic feelings. Lmao. OK, good start...

- Dean screaming at Sam “all I see is everything we’ve lost” - cuts to just Cas dying. OK. Thanks for clarifying that meta from last year up for us Dabb ;)

- That freeze frame tho. Even shortened it’s still terrible. Stawp.

- Cut to Sam in the car, this is like the one with Rowena where it went from the opening song to her in the car and I love it, please do more. Oh, bonus if we can get one where Dean does it and he looks at the camera like he’s on the office and switches it from something rocky to, like, Miley Cyrus :p

- The point of the Jamil scene, whilst in itself it is divisive and has offended some viewers (and I do not condone that but I write meta so here is the meta), was clear re: Michael. Showing that Michael essentially is that asshole who doesn’t care how much you redeemed yourself and now are trying to do good but says you want selfish things and remembers that one time you did something wrong 8 years ago and won’t let you get past it. He also enjoys putting words in others’ mouths and judging them from above because he somehow thinks he is some all knowing, all judging clever clogs (and better than Gabriel, pfft he doesn’t even know our Gabriel but just assumes he’s better, ok then...). He’s a self absorbed, self assured, arrogant, genocidal, doesn’t give a shit about humanity wanker with a chip on his shoulder having inherited some power from his daddy he doesn’t know what to do with and has only shown so far that he can balls it up royally but somehow thinks this time, this time it'll work cos he’s oh so intelligent and right. Oh look, Michael is Trump.

- “A better world”. Well I’ve talked about that a lot previously, how this links to the other extreme end of the MoL, essentially we have the MoL at one end telling us the world can only be better if you remove anything supernatural and Michael at the other saying it can only be better if you remove anything natural. Longer meta on these and how they also link to John and the season 1 onwards black/white to grey area progression here: x and x  Dabb is really hammering home the grey area / balance themes in the middle for endgame and I love him for it.

- DEAD MANS BLOOD BULLETS what a great idea! I’ve not seen anyone comment on this yet but honestly, this is up there with salt hoolahoops and exorcisms saved on your phone ;)

- Sam “chief” Winchester. I’m living. I mean let the dude take a nap but the concept and symbolism of him as the leader, taking charge of the hunters and the bunker, Mary as his lieutenant, everyone looking up to him with respect because of what he has done and who he is rather than out of fear or duty... I can’t express just how much I love this and am grateful it’s as blatant as it is.

- Castiel gets kidnapped and used as “bait” (yes there’s like 5 layers of symbolism here and I hate/love it) and the whole thing with Sam telling them there’ll be no king of Hell goes down in Detroit. Yeah sure tell me Dabb doesn’t care about mirrors and previous canon references, parallels and subversions ;)

- I just can’t even with Sassy!Cas *rolls eyes* *uses “GOD” as a blatant blasphemy* is just so human, being so done when Kip makes his stupid OTT grand entrance whilst Cas is calmly sat in front of the fire pit and then tells him he’ll burn him to ash. YES MY SON.

- “Joined at the... (Dick)”. Yes Kip I get you, everyone does, literally everyone thinks they’re boning, cos duh, but you see they could actually have an ounce of happiness within the chaos if they weren’t so bloody miscommunicative and self hating that they haven’t even admitted their feelings let alone touched each other yet below the shoulder. But yes, please, do join the hoards of characters on the show who assume they are a couple. 

*Tink stares into the camera*

- The less said about Michael’s puny ass winged ‘twuform’ the better. Yes it looks like a pigeon with disproportionally tiny wings, yes it looks like Dean bent his halo (lolz) but aside from the humour there’s nothing good about this.

- Michael: Dean said yes for love. Ah yes. The power of love. I love to be reminded that this whole show’s premise since the pilot is love. Thanks Satan.

- Michael thinks Anael is everything Cas is. “The rebel, the Angel who doesn’t like playing by Heaven’s rules” I mean jeez, like a hammer to the face much! Well, Danneel said she did want to play Castiel so ;) x and x 

- Tbh I also got massive self reflection vibes here off the next part on performing!Dean and I just love how all this comes out of Dean’s own mouth, it’s just so symbolic. Every time Michael says something it seems to be a reflection on John or Dean or daddy issues of some sort.

Re: Performing!Dean: “You pretend to care about these things... pretty things, but that’s all it is, pretending. These trinkets, they don’t make you happy they just pass the time, they’re not what you really want”. *Tink stares at all of the meta on Performing!Dean repression by overcompensating, especially with sex to pass the time and try to alleviate his mood with women, especially since season 7, every time Cas is gone and he’s pining*.

- What do you really want? This basically works for both Dean and Cas (and Sam too to be fair but he’s not been mirrored previously so I’m going with the symbolism here being most relevant to Cas mirror Anael and Dean whose literally saying it through a veil): “love, to belong, to have a place a home a family... it’s very very human”.

- *Cough* blatant easy link and exposition of endgame Human!Cas and Nonperforming!Dean. *sends Dabb a giant fruit and donut basket*

- Cleary the theme of season 14 is “what do you want” just as season 13′s was “who are you”. Excellently linked themes.

- Sam is just going around all episode fixing other peoples issues and taking no time for himself, he needs a friend and a nap.

- Jack is actually not doing badly considering and I’m so happy they made him sad and angsty without being an annoying whiney teenager (I do have an issue with how Claire was made into this and am annoyed with the m/f difference but sigh, clearly they were trying to do something better with WS. Sigh again).

- I actually kinda loved the Sam / Nick scene. Since it was clear Mark P was coming back (literally why Satan) I made peace with it and expected Nick and I hope they continue with it as well as I think it started. Mark’s little gestures of itching and wincing really helped with the overall feel here so through gritted teeth I say kudos. Jared steals the show though at his own minute facial expressions and the deep meaning of this scene for him, I’m sure he enjoyed acting this immensely as he’s always cared a lot for the Sam/Lucifer storyline and it’s closure. Obviously it’s got implications for Michael!Dean so let’s see what happens. Sam was amazing obviously, man, I just... really hope Bucklemming don’t fuck this up as Nick’s likely their play thing. Fingers crossed, it’s off to a good start.

- If they really do follow through on this really cack-handed obvious “we can kill Michael by stabbing Dean and save Dean” story then I’ll be really fucking disappointed. This is lazy and too obvious, it also negates all the possibility for the Dean/John mirror from 2x01 with John angry at them for not killing him to kill Azazel and thus leading into Dean’s blatantly exposed self worth arc throughout the season while he struggles to feel worthy of being alive at the potential expense of the world, with his family telling him he does deserve to be saved (>...>). I mean... I just can’t really get my head around this not happening? Or it being so frankly badly written if it is? It feels more like a red herring to me, like, a giant red herring. If it doesn’t happen like this and they just stab Michael with the shittyretconblade then I’ll be shocked. Though I’ll be less shocked if it’s in the Bucklemming episode and I’ll attribute this to their shitty writing and Dabb really having zero fucking says in his own show anymore and the whole thing going downhill moving forwards. So either way it’s bad. So fingers, toes and everything crossed this isn’t what happens.

- The fact that Cas knew Sam would come save him gives me so many happy feels whereas I feel only a few seasons ago he would have said he’s not worth saving / why would Sam bother. He trusts Sam and he believes Sam loves him. Happy Tink.

- “He just told you he’s a demon?” “Yep”. I love Sassy! Sam.

- Bait. It’s kind of what you’re for isn’t it? I just... That was so hilariously triple, quadruple, whatever, entendre... bait for the audience, bait for the Winchesters, bait associated with fish as Castiel usually is, just, it made me laugh out loud and @bluestar86 looked at me like I’d gone nuts but I loved the cleverness of it. Though also fuck you Cas is more than bait ;) I mean Dabb knows that he loves Cas he’s being tongue in cheek but yeah, this made me chuckle big time.

- Michael has been to see Kip and it again hopefully will be a continuation of the theme of Michael being so black and white he turns grey people black or white. I’d love to see an opposite where his asking this question of what do you want actually makes someone choose to do the right thing.

- Mary “I have to think about the good Sam, because if I don’t I’ll just drown in the bad, for Dean’s sake I can’t do that, we can’t do that”. Wow. Mary ploughing on, seemingly cold to others until she’s probed, revealing her internal emotional struggle, forever threatening to overflow and the actual drive for her actions that in full circle are what makes her come across as uncaring. If this isn’t Mary’s whole arc since her resurrection in one sentence. If it ain’t also a massive TFW mirror. IN ONE SENTENCE. GOD I LOVE ANDREW DABB OK?!

- Bobby re-emphasising the family theme to Jack in the impala, reminiscent of Jack telling the Winchester’s they are his family in the impala last season.

- Equating Sam to Beyoncé for his glorious physique, hair and overall legend / icon status is just A. Brilliantly hilarious and reminding us how great Sam is but also B. So cool to give zero shits that Beyoncé is a woman and is just as capable of being a role model for a guy. Kudos Dabb. C. I just imagine Cas looking on like but I’m Beyoncé! ;)

- The fight scene is just too embarrassing, that knife flip between Mary and Sam is so 80’s bionic man and more wires like, my dudes, my guys, stawwwwwwp. I’m also annoyed tbh that Maggie is for some reason a young, relatively helpless and hapless girl rather than being an AU survivor and hunter. Like, why even bring her from the off no questions asked while questioning Jack, if she’s so helpless she’s hiding and gormless to the point Mary had to actually ask her if she knows how to stab someone. This is weird and I hope they’re going to show her developing cos urgh. wtf.

- Cas is “still breathing” after fighting like a human and being all bloodied up like a human without healing himself. straight into the #human!cas tag. 

- Callbacks to Crowley and as @bluestar86 said Kip just reminds us of another demon dude from 14x08 and this is totally true, “Barthamus call me Bart" and “Kipling call me Kip”. What’s next, “Judas call me J”?. 

- Sam’s “enough!” 

is the best moment of this episode hands down and I am excite for this symbolism for his character growth. I don’t personally think this is at all him declaring he’s King or Regent, he’s just asserting his very puny human authority, albeit as the one time could have been ruler but he isn’t and doesn’t want to be, and regardless the demons fear him for who he is as Sam Winchester not as a potential king. 

BOOM> Sam Fucking Winchester amiright?!

He’s feared by demons because of who he chooses to be as a person and he’s respected by humans for who he chooses to be.

It’s a total mirror opposite.

It’s a bookend. 

I LOVE it.

DAMN DABB.

- Cas supporting Sam, the only one who really asks how he is, is such brother / best friend goals. Sam being honest about his feelings and the opposite mirror of Cas deflecting from his own when Sam asks how he is in return is painful. Please Cas, tell us what you want.

- “Sunshine”. OK but literally the whole point of that scene was Bobby calling Mary sunshine while flirting with beer bottles. Nothing else happened. It’s like Dabb is literally wielding a Destiel subtext hammer and bashing it into canon in new and interesting ways every moment he can at this point when they’re not even in the episode or scene. I’m reminded of David/Violet. I wanted Mary/Bobby Destiel parallels and we got it in episode 1. Excellent.

- Cas and Jack have their deeply meaningful mirroring scene about feeling human whilst both sporting mirroring injuries from mirrored wounds and both being punched in the face. (Dabb loves mirrors so much I may send him a fruit and donut basket with a great big mirror inside too for shits and giggles). 

Cas and Jack’s scene is yet more exposition that neither are valid due to their powers but valid and loved for who they are. 

Just as Sam is feared by demons and respected by humans for who he is not due to any demon blood or destiny. 

Just as Dean is loved and will be saved by his family because of who he is not how useful he is as a tool.

I’m reminded of my tag #season who we are 13 because that was so set up in that season from Dabb’s own premiere, showing just how much he does hark back and have a clear and consistent thematic overview of his story. 

You may by this point see why I’m quite so done with the Dabb bashing on SM this week? How it’s totally inconsistent with the actual canon of the show? That he clearly knows exactly what he’s doing thematically even if he’s not so hot on small details and Bucklemming/Singer take turns dumping a turd into his and the others writers’ pot of gold every now and again? Yeah, thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

- LET SAM SLEEP 2k19!!!

[serenagaywaterford]

#5 - I am checking in now that you’ve read some of these reviews. Yeah, very uneasy about this development. You are right, if the diehard Serena fans are getting tired of the seesawing, imagine the casual fans, or haters. But I am still hopeful a firm and lasting June/Serena alliance is still a possibility in the second half of the show, we’ll see. Either that, or kill her off. I don’t want them ruining a great character. It is a bit tiring honestly, my enthusiasm definitely suffers a bit.

Numba 5 :D I take it you’ve read all the reviews too? Sigh. Just a great big head-shaking sigh. 

One minute I read all this disappointing, worrisome shit. The next I read something nice and positive that gives me some semblance of hope it won’t be  that bad after all, and then I come back and read new shit that sounds even worse than the initial disappointing stuff! What is happening lol. This is the worst way to build enthusiasm for a new season!! Honestly, I don’t see very many fans all that pleased in general. Serena fans are on anxious tenterhooks, Nick fans seem rather bummed by some of it, Rita fans are flipping out, Lawrence fans seem a bit hesitant, (Are there Fred or Luke fans???), Moira and Emily fans are also worried from what I can see, casual fans seem okay, I guess?? Everyone’s a June fan so... that’s sort of pointless to talk about lol. Like the reviews sometimes sound good, and then another one will say the opposite thing happens. (I really don’t know what to think about Emily’s arc... I can’t tell where its head is at based on the reviews/spoilers.)

I won’t post any spoilers, but just in case people don’t wanna read me bitching about the vague shit in reviews and interviews, I’ll cut this. Also, I’m a major Debbie Downer lol so I’m sure a lot of excited people don’t wanna read that either, haha.

But I feel ya. I’m tired. My enthusiasm has deffo really suffered in the last few days. I was just saying the other day that all these “teasers” aren’t helping either cos everything is out of context and says nothing really, but requires a lot of speculation and that’s just exhausting to do day after day. AND THE SEASON HASN’T EVEN STARTED YET. I remember last year being a lot more excited. Like legitimately thrilled, even reading the pre-season reviews. It’s weird to me to feel this way when I was soooooooo excited just a month ago. I was bouncing off the walls with joy! Now I’m burnt out, lmao.

“But I am still hopeful a firm and lasting June/Serena alliance is still a possibility in the second half of the show, we’ll see.”

You know. I’m with you. All of these reviews are based on the first 6 episodes of the season and it is sorta jumping the gun to judge a whole season based on the build-up. Six episodes isn’t even quite halfway. Maybe it gets significantly better in the backhalf. It just doesn’t bode very well if it takes 6 episodes to get things moving, and that even at that point Serena is still full on her annoying bullshit.

I’m pretty much a hopeless romantic in some ways. Like it won’t really matter completely but I will ALWAYS hope that there is a LASTING June/Serena alliance in the latter half of the season that is significant and shows Serena’s character growth--if there is any lol. Like, even in a non-shippy way, I want June and Serena working together. I’m gonna be picky and spoiled but I need it to be together. Not working towards the same goal, but divided and at odds with each other. I want them communicating and agreeing. Not just “Oh, look, there goes June doing her idea. And, oh, over there is Serena doing her totally separate thing, that’s vaguely related to the same goal?” I want teamwork. And I want teamwork with other women too. With Alma, Janine, Moira, (Emily? I dunno if she’ll be in a healthy enough place tbh.), even possibly Aunt Lydia. I don’t need unrealistic “super happy families!” vibes either. It can be terse and difficult and conflicted and they can stumble and miscommunicate along the way. It can require June ramming Serena with reality checks (as she does)... but I want them all in the same general direction, with the same general ideas of how to get there. Each has their own strengths, skills, opinions, and knowledge that would influence the goal in their own ways. Oh god, I’m making it sound like I want Ocean’s 8: Gilead Edition. And I want the complex June/Serena dynamic at the centre of it. 

But that’s my personal perfect world and this show is very much not willing to be that brave, lmao. (MAKE IT GAY(ER), YOU COWARDS. I’m only half-kidding.)

“Either that, or kill her off. I don’t want them ruining a great character.”

I used to be really opposed to killing off Serena. But that was back when I thought they were going to move her arc along to something better. If this all they insist on doing to her for the backhalf of the season, and presumably the next... just kill her off already. I suspect, based on Miller’s “jokes”, that he has no intention of killing either Waterford off -- which is a shame cos Fred just... go away, Fred. He’s redundant and so superfluous to these women’s stories at this point and I don’t care what headass sympathy-inducing crap they give us in S3, I will always feel that way. But she’s been a fantastic character thus far and to just keep beating this flipfloppy dead horse they consider “interesting” wrt Serena, just let her go. I can’t imagine anybody sticking around and retaining their interest in a character that literally never grows or learns or commits to anything and is constantly going one way only to flip back the other for seasons on end. Sounds... annoying and boring.

Maybe some people like that? Miller and Strahovski seem to. (I get why Yvonne does on some level: it’s fun as an actress to play with all those extremes. It’s challenging and exciting not to play the same note all the time. So, I get why an actress would think it’s a good idea for a character to be so... extra.) What I don’t get is why a showrunner/writer would. I’m not saying never have Serena fuck up--cos we all know she’s gonna--but just not the same ways all the time. Cos at this point, we been knew. We KNOW that every single time Serena does something kind/nice/good, she’ll snap back and do something fucked up. Like, it’s just EXPECTED. There’s no surprise. The first few times, sure. But when they keep doing it over and over and over and over...

That is fucking BORING. It’s come to just eye-rolling now. I don’t read these reviews and comments by Yvonne and say “OH NOOOOO. Serena’s back on her bullshit!! Nooooo. SAD FACE!!!!” Nope. I just read them and say, “Ugh. Again? Really? Yawn.” and “What shitty writers that they can’t come up with anything new for her to do.”

Like, we knew at the end of S2 that Serena was gonna regret letting Nichole go. Miller came right out and said it. And that was fine. That’s actually reasonable and normal and I can get behind that. It makes sense. I was all onboard for some serious grieving and regret. That’s totally understandable under the circumstances. I’m even here for the way trauma/grief/fear influences Serena’s often confounding decisions. And, I mean, I’ve seen a lot of cult-breakers and cults in general and all sorts of psychological stuff so I know Serena’s crap isn’t something she can just shut off in one day; it’s a long process--but it tends to move in a determinate direction, even just baby steps (or not at all). It’s so deeply ingrained and it’s ~safe. It takes time and I was 1000% behind ALL that. But by the sounds of that, it’s not really going in that thoughtful direction. People’s attitudes and beliefs may be difficult to change, but they don’t weave all over the damn place merely for the sake of shock and drama.

More like “We want Serena and June to scream at each other under iconic American monuments! How can we do that? Make Serena do some super fucked up thing for barely any reason!” Also, “Hide all her motivations! Make it really murky so people won’t understand it! That makes us clever. Hurr durr!!”

It’s just giving me Benioff & Weiss vibes...

Harumpf.

I will keep an open mind, but I’m no longer holding my breath that something amazing is gonna come out of this unless the backhalf of the season is exceptionally better than the first 6. (But again, I feel like S2 was like that. The second half did seem stronger overall. IMO, anyway. With 2 major exceptions, heh.) 

So, yeah. I’m trying to just not read or look at too much more until it starts airing. Otherwise I may talk myself out of enjoying it! LMAO. I’m so weak. (But I’m also such a slut for June/Serena so........)

[staliasjeronica]

Riverdale 3.01 Thoughts *spoilers*

- the kids... are JUNIORS? Uh okay.

- VERONICA. MY LOVE. MY BABY. IN A POP’S OUTFIT!!!

- still iffy about Betty being in law... like where’d it come from? Her likeness of it? It’s probably just because of Archie’s trial and the fact that she constantly breaks the law, but still... it seemed to come out of nowhere

- In the narration he talked about Archie, Betty, and Veronica being the “best friends you’ll ever have” and I’m just stating that that means that Jeronica are officially best friends! Y E S BITCH!

- did this bitch seriously just call Nick St. Claire... INNOCENT? And brought up the fact that he pulled a gun on Sweet Pea? I’ve always wanted that confrontation but NOT LIKE THIS.

- MARY ANDREWS! A fucking legend! Her speech was incredible, too. Like, if I was a Riverdale resident and didn’t know Archie, I would definitely believe that he was innocent. But of course something stupid like Archie being a dumbass (love you though, Arch) is going to fuck everything up 🙄🙄🙄

- JOSIE AND KEVIN STANDING SIDE BY SIDE IS ALL I NEEDED!!! I can’t wait to see more of them as step siblings and shit. Maybe she can convince Kevin not to get with Moose lmao I hate him so fucking much

- HIRAM YOU DO NOT GET TO FUCKING TALK TO ARCHIE YOU LITTLE BITCH

- I’VE SEEN SPOILERS SO I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE FRED PUNCH A BITCH

- As amazing as that was though... THAT WOULDN’T HELP ARCHIE’S CASE IT WOULD MAKE IT WORSE!!!

- lmao Hiram gets angry and pushes the guy who kept him from getting back at Fred as if he didn’t start it what a bitch

- dilton and Ben... are really gonna die aren’t they. This is a Midge situation— bring them back to kill them wow... also why does Dilton look like he could be Sweet Pea’s younger brother...

- so both Veronica and Jughead got chocolate shakes. I’m not saying they’re soulmates... but they’re soulmates and I don’t care what Camila says about Jeronica... they’re meant to be together oops

- CHERYL MY BISEXUAL/LESBIAN QUEEN!!!! MAKING HER FUCKING ENTRANCE!

- but it’s so sad that she made the effort to invite all of them to her party but they couldn’t make an exception to couples weekend... like I know it helped Cheryl get with Toni but that’s just... sad.

- ALSO CHERY’S JACKET IM WHEEZING CALL AN AMBULANCE

- of course Choni had three months of development but we won’t see it 🙃🙃🙃

- can’t really hear what Alice and Polly are really saying... but I definitely heard Alice say “ritual” and you never hear that word unless you’re in a cult wake the fuck up alice you can’t be more fucked up than Betty and Polly you need to help save them

- Dr. Glass... therapist? Mmhm but wouldn’t they tell her that she’s too reliant and co-dependent on Jughead and hopefully break them up? I call bullshit on this therapist

- BARCHIE + FRED WORKING ON A CAR TOGEHER WOW WE LOVE A FUTURE ENDGAME BEING HOT ASS MECHANICS TOGETHER WITH HER FUTURE FAMILY

- “we did it dad” the way he said this... might have made me choke... it was so happy and excited, like a kid. I’m NOT CRYING OKAY

- “just in time” *Fred immediately avoids eye contact with Archie before stating he’s going back into the house* BITCH HE’S GOING IN THERE TO CRY HUH LIKE HE’S THINKING ABOUT HIS SON GOING TO JAIL THIS IS HORRIBLE.

- “the jury is still deliberating, you don’t need to put your house in order” Betty... it’s called JUST IN CASE. Plus it would ease his mind so... shut up lmao

- THE TEARS IN RONNIE’S EYES AS SHE’S CONFRONTING HER FATHER BBY NOOOO

- ALSO SHE HAS TO LIVE UNDER THE SAME ROOF AS HIM IM SO SORRY SWEETIE GO LIVE WITH JUG OR MOVE IN WITH FRED! She doesn’t deserve this you bitch ass Hiram

- also I’m sad that Hiram doesn’t have a bruise from Fred punching him

- I’ll say it until I die but I’m just gonna say it now: HIRAM IS A BITCH ASS HOE! He literally destroyed Archie’s life and devastated his daughter... all for a fucking P R I S O N

- SWEET PEA AND FANGS HAVE OFFICIALLY BLESSED MY SCREENS YAY. Also Fangs your bisexual ass is showing with that extremely open shirt... and Sweet Pea... you fucking too lmao I love Swangs (no hate but I’m also kinda here for Swosie even though it’s just a fling)

- it’s... so annoying... that Hiram is with the Ghoulies, yet makes out the Serpents to be the worst. Like Hiram your bought gang members are cannibals (apparently), and are the ACTUAL gang that sells and distributes Jingle Jangle soooo wtf

- Jug... you can’t send Fangs without backup. I REPEAT YOU CANNOT SEND FANGS WITHOUT SOME BACKUP! He got shot once and I swear if he’s hurt again I’m going to end you. I only care about certain people: Sweet Pea, Fangs, Cheryl, Toni, Veronica, and Archie... so if you get one of them hurt you’re dead to me

- we all been knew that Archie’s tattoo was fake but LOOK AT FP IN GLASSES I’M

- I love Betty with these outfits. They’re really nice tbh

- Alice... you can’t burn SOMEONE ELSE’S JOURNAL! Also yeah it’s filled with negative shit but that’s why it’s written in journals... to vent and get it over with.

- also if you have to reference someone (Edgar) every sentence you know you’re probably too reliant on them

- although what Alice says about sitting still and shit is kinda true I guess. Betty doesn’t need to be constantly figuring shit out but I’ll just pretend I never agreed with the woman in a fucking cult

- is Polly gonna tell her about her Betty’s “darkness” because PLEASE(or the webcamming). When Alice gets better she can call Betty out on her shit.

- Cheryl’s a queen, I love her place, but Moose is here so uhhhh ew.

- SWOSIE BITCHES!!!! I saw gifs of it and I love it

- “not even a tall, cool drink of sweet water like you...” as she STROKES HIS FUCKING CHEST I’M

- but he was so happy and cute “I can’t wait to see you in the hallways”

- BITCH SWEET PEA IS A ROMANTIC WHAT

- the way he leans back into the kiss is everything, and the way he watches her leave I’m star struck goodbye

- you give me Swosie just to immediately go to Mevin? You couldn’t have gone to another couple at least? Don’t ruin the moment ugh

- Kevin... is proposing... a sex pact? Wtf? But Moose looks so uncomfortable, which I find actually pretty sad. Kevin wants someone who’s out, who isn’t afraid to be with him in public and that person isn’t Moose. He was really happy with Joaquin and now that he knows why Joaquin was slightly distant there’ll be no secrets between them so... bring Joaquin back so Joavin can rise again you cowards! Moose needs to find himself, but he shouldn’t bring Kevin with him. He needs to go through this by himself.

- mmhm Reggie not giving a damn about Archie’s (fake) Serpent tattoo... I want to see Reggie apologize to the Serpents (and also find out that Sweet Pea is his brother oops)

- oh Bc Archie asks Reggie’s cool with the Serpents. I DEFINITELY need an apology right fucking now, Mantle.

- “whatcha thinking bout, babe?” BABE. B A B E. BABE BABE BABE BABE BABE BABE BABE

- I have subtitles on and it says “Tee-Tee” NO ITS T-T (or just TT)

- poor Cheryl 😭😭😭

- but also why the fuck is there a couch outside by the pool lmao

- Veronica is constantly about to cry and I’m... with her. I’m gonna cry too STAWP

- YAS JOSIE!!!!

- dilton... we were all excited to see you again but now you’re just being a creepy weirdo so...

- FANGS MY BBY

- UMMMMMM LEAVE HOTDOG ALONE

- lmao Betty seems so out of place at this little Serpent meeting... she really does not belong there

- “the Serpent Queen is a Warrior queen” the next fucking sentence better be Toni or Sweet Pea shutting her the fuck down. If she was a “Serpent Queen” she would ACTUALLY TRULY care about the Serpents instead of joining so she can stay closer to Jughead and shit

- Sweet Pea slightly shook his head in the background so I’m just gonna... pretend he told Betty to shut the fuck up

- Betty’s gonna fuck everything up and then blame it on someone else isn’t she

- Awww Archie overhearing his parents talking about Archie and the trial. “Even I couldn’t stop Hiram Lodge from getting his claws into our son” STAWP 😭😭😭

- Archie thinks that he deserves this? Bitch BETTY is the one who’s done actual (okay well the worst crimes of the group) crimes but her bitch ass isn’t going to jail! She never gets any repurcussions. If anyone deserves going to jail it’s Betty

- Sheriff Minetta... no one misses you

- Betty has her own Serpent jacket... I mean thanks I hate it but I also hate to admit that she looks actually good in it. Still doesn’t deserve to be a Serpent she’s done nothing for them except bone their “leader”

- lmao Cheryl is strong af pushing Betty back into the car.

- Jughead... do you seriously think they’re going to let you leave with Hot Dog? Lmao maybe you do deserve Betty you two are both idiots

- YASSS CHERYL FUCK MALACHAI UPPPPP

- this weird dream of Archie’s was pretty cool. I was confused for a second but still it was really awesome

- of course the one thing Betty ACTUALLY needs and she lies about it. Also, add forging prescriptions to her list of criminal offenses. Can you just once write Betty to be likable? When she comforted Veronica was great (although still need an apology from her) but that Serpent queen line... omfg no

- although they’re a part of a fucking cult Polly is making some great points.

- YOUNGBLOOD BY 5SOS!!

- So... despite being invited by Cheryl to her party they don’t invite her or anyone else to the fucking water hole place? Wtf

- “last one in gets a sticky maple!” That’s... kind of rude considering what Chuck did to Veronica. Speaking of where is Chuck? Did they start that redemption ark for NOTHING? Also the statement is worse when V is the last to jump in...

- wow look at Varchie being the hottest couple (there. The hottest couple is obviously Choni)

- Jughead you’re not supposed to burn the marshmallows

- JUGHEAD YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL ARCHIE TO MAKE A RUN FOR IT YOU STUPID FUCK

- YES BETTY! GET SOME FUCKING HELP

- If Jughead supports this, they will finally being going in a good direction? For once? Like if you’re going to force this disgusting ship on us at least make them healthy and tolerable

- I hate them but the beanie scene was cute. Probably because Cole actually improvised that

- When Varchie’s scene was still much better, hotter, and aesthetic than Betty and Jughead’s lmao thank you Riverdale

- why do they make Varchie cuter when they’re going to end them? This is bullshit

- hey maybe if they make Betty and Jughead cuter (cause let’s be honest they’ve had like two cute scenes that I’ll admit to lol) they’ll end their relationship too

- VEGAS

- what the fuck dilton lol

- “we can talk about this when I get back” wow that’s a surefire way to make sure that Dilton dies

- like I said Archie does something stupid and ruins EVERYTHING.

- Archie... if you’re FIGHTING FOR YOUR LIFE no one FUCKING cares that they’d have to go through this shit again. I love you but you’re stupid as fuck

- Veronica 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

- ARCHIE’S LAST WORDS WILL BE “I love you, Veronica” IM SOBBING

- Veronica’s look to Hiram is lethal and I’m here for it.

- Honestly... if they somehow manage to make this about Betty I’ll scream because we all know Betty has to be interwoven into every plot

- DADS OF RIVERDALE FUCK YEAH

- ALL OF THEM WORKING TOGETHER? YES BITCH

- AND VERONICA STILL HAS TO GO HOME WITH HIRAM?

- honestly though why didn’t they make her testify awhile ago? They said it was too late but her statement would help? She LIVES with the man, she could easily tell them about how much of a master manipulator he is like... what the fuck

- literally Veronica just wear a wire around Hiram so you can implicate him. He legit just told you that he did all of this to get back at you for choosing him over blood (also wow so healthy)

- “you don’t have a daughter anymore” we love and stan Veronica

- so... Jug shouldn’t have gone alone but uhh Dilton is fucking dead

- um what the fuck is with the babies... and also why is Betty convulsing? Probably gonna be blamed on the supernatural instead of her Adderral. (Also I just reached the limit of this holy fuck lmao)