#anime is a good example bc sometimes there will be an old man that actually looks like one

[gatitobladee]

my very own tips for young artists that wouldhave helped me immensely

- im begging you practice face shapes that arent a triangle with spiky chin. there is so much variety in face shapes

- if you hate the lineart go over it one more time. especially if it's traditional art and you cant ctrl+z

- ummm. study and do it with your hand & not your eyes. i look at pictures all day and still nothing beats just sitting down and practicing

[lannisterdaddyissues]

Ahhh sleepover!! 😆 need to know all your pennymav headcanons and also how was your day?

OMG SLEEPOVER WITH THE BESTIE WHAT WILL WE DO 😝💕🎶

^us rn <3

as for my day, it was really good!!!! i visited my parents today, we went out to dinner at this really nice backwoods restaurant! they had really delicious seafood and it was run on a farm, so they had a whole garden out back with a bunch of farm animals to go look at, plus i got to meet two of the restaurant cats and they were soooo sweet 🥺 one of them jumped up on the railing whenever i walked by because it wanted me to pet it and i just ughrsdghsrgfh kitties 💗

anyway PENNYMAV HEADCANONS !!!! GOD I LOVE THEM SM I WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE THIS IN MY INBOX BC I CANNOT THINK ABOUT THEM ENOUGH <33333 THEY ARE SO IMPORTANT TO ME

so without further ado, the goods:

penny was the first person mav serenaded in a bar when they were younger

penny liked to think she had high standards but mav had her as soon as he opened his mouth

he still sings to her in private but don’t make the mistake of asking him to sing in public. that right belongs to penny and penny alone

penny was actually the one who convinced mav to steal the f-18

she was literally insane back then

mav tells this story to everybody but they never believe him because penny is literally god’s perfect angel

penny thinks this is hilarious and gaslights him about it because she thinks it’s cute when he gets mad

mav is so easy though. all it takes to earn his forgiveness is a kiss on the cheek. #simp

brunch dates are their thing

they do go out for fancy dinners every once in a while, but casual settings are actually preferred because they don’t want to force their relationship, keeping things chill and low-key is fine with them

also, penny is OBSESSED with breakfast food

her go-to order is a stack of buttermilk pancakes with powdered sugar and fruit on it because she loves sweets and fruit

mav just orders something healthy and boring like avocado toast lol. he’s a health nut with terrible taste in food (seriously he would eat a brick if you served it to him on a plate, he tastes no

difference)

penny highlights her hair now because it used to be more naturally auburn when she was younger and she misses the color

her hair was actually the first thing mav noticed about her when they first met, he thought it was so prettyyyy

penny cannot stand roaches and spiders so mav has to play brian pest control in her house once every few months

for real if penny sees a roach it’s game over. she will scream and wail like a banshee until mav finally ambles over to get rid of them for her, she’s so pathetic about them

on the other hand penny LOVES lizards because being a reptile enjoyer is her weird girl trait. there are lots to be found at the hard deck too which is great

more often than not if amelia isn’t sitting at the bar doing homework she’s out back chasing lizards. if mav isn’t inside either then he’s out there with her

aside from de-roaching her house, mav is also penny’s personal handyman

need your lights strung up? he’s your man

need your appliances fixed? he’s your man

need repairs done on your car? he’s your man

need kisses on your forehead? he’s your man

mav gets sleepy when he’s drunk and his favorite place to nap is on penny’s chest

“she’s soft and she smells nice” - mav 2k19 (he’s no thoughts head empty for her when he gets like this)

penny loves it when he naps on her. it’s like having a heated AND weighted blanket rolled into one

however sometimes said blanket will awkwardly grope her on accident (or was it…) in the middle of the night and that’s always fun

the 86 squad jokingly buy mav wife guy t-shirts as gag gifts but he loves them and wears them unironically all the time

examples include:

“PROPERTY OF MY HOT WIFE”

“MY WIFE SAYS I ONLY HAVE TWO FAULTS 🌠 I DON’T LISTEN AND SOMETHING ELSE.” (purchased by hollywood)

“MY WIFE HAS AN AWESOME HUSBAND”

“THIS GUY HAS A 👉 CRUSH 👈 ON HIS WIFE”

mav being an old guy gets really sore sometimes and penny gives the most incredible massages

if she hadn’t opened the hard deck she could’ve been a masseuse fr

she has such soft hands!!! and her nails feel so good when they scratch his back just ufhrsgfhrsghgr

mav is in heaven rn

AAAAA AND THAT’S ALL I HAVE FOR NOW BUT THAT’S ONLY BECAUSE IT’S PAST MIDNIGHT I’M SURE I COULD THINK OF MORE IF I TRIED HARDER

also… ahaha… nsfw headcanons beneath the cut if you want… 😳👉👈

young penny and mav were both shameless harlots and had a pretty sexually open relationship

naturally this means they got into lots of threesomes because hell yeah

they’re pretty private about their sex life now though because they like to keep that part of each other all to themselves… hehehe

BUT if cyclone ever decides to take penny up on her offer he knows where to find them ;)

penny is such a lingerie girl she could be a victoria’s secret model

she likes to surprise mav with new sexy lil pieces she finds online, it keeps things spicy in the bedroom

his face is always a national treasure every time she brings out something new

if you think seeing them on her is good though? imagine how good she looks when he takes them off for her

the only thing better is how good it feels when he takes them off for her

mav is a master of the art of cunnilingus

he’s sucked so much dick between relationships you can’t tell me he doesn’t know how to use his tongue

he gets hard instantly when penny sits on his face (and he’s real for it honestly have you SEEN young jencon!!! she has the sexiest thighs i’ve ever seen in my life i want them to choke me)

if mav is a master of cunnilingus then naturally penny is the mistress of the strap

she definitely pulls mav’s hair when she fucks him

the moans he makes are OBSCENE

they have crossed off every item on their sex bucket list

fuck on a boat

fuck on a beach

fuck on the dock

fuck in a bathroom

fuck in a car

fuck in a plane

fuck in her dad’s bed

fuck in her dad’s office

fuck by a window

i cannot believe i just typed all of this jesus please forgive me

[faulix]

Mhm! I am also rooting for Meteor Impact to get animated bc G O D, but right now the signs are not pointing towards that one right now. Tbh Meteor Impact would be a good one to end on. And yeah, Marionette was in the original anime, but so was Rocket Start. And they also animated a part of RS (conversation between Wataru and Natsume) in the Element anime which is why I was (and still am tbh) leaning to Rocket Start potentially not getting animated. BUT I MUST BELIEVE.

Their climax story is literally an apology for sidelining Trickstar as protagonists so much in !! era, so they could start fixing that problem with RS anime and event ^_^

And yeah they absolutely get a bit sidelined and overshadowed by other units, though sometimes they do give them the favorite child treatment, emphasis on SOMETIMES. Xday, their climax story, for example was AMAZING especially when compared to other unit climax stories. But the rest of !! Trickstar? Ayayaya man... they fell off. Their entire problem throughout the !! era is about how much they fell off, how they're broke and how much ES hates them bc of their troublemaker reputation. They did basically nothing with that at all except for in their climax story (I mean Satellite is also like that but sssshh) where they teases that Trickstar's next arc is gonna be about them once again rebelling and potentially going independent! So I'm excited to see where they're headed in the future and what the actual arc is going to be like.

So imagine getting hit in the face by potential new idols. Goodbye😭

I didn't want new idols in the first place because it'll fuck with the rotation and HappyEle already does pretty poorly with balancing their characters already with focus and such.

But if these new idols end up taking up all the focus again when it looked like Xday was trying to lead to Trickstar making a comeback as the true protagonists, it just makes me sad. I'll stay hopeful until we got more info though, but it's looking bleak out here. Especially the rotation is looking bleak if these new characters are actually playable idols oml.

It really feels like it's gonna be like "hey so Subaru is our posterboy, but do we actually have any plans for him?"

"We do, but we're not gonna do any of that. He'll just stay our posterboy"

Like dude the papahoshi storyline is found dead in Miami, god help me out of here. First they tease he might be alive in Sanctuary which is like 2.5 years ago and then Xday was about gifting Subaru the gift of seeing his dad again through an old video showcasing what papahoshi was like as a dad and now... I can see myself waiting another 5 years. But that's typical for enstars. It's not like papahoshi is the whole reason anything happens here anyways. Not at all. Why would he. And why would his son be important to anything in the plot. Protagonist? No. Just my househusband.

possible rocket start anime announcement 🤝 possible meteor impact anime announcement

one of my friends passing out instantly at the announcement

ok i have not been keeping up with enstars at all but god the rotation would be so fucked. i like that they got some good content in their climax though!!!! honestly it does suck that the revolutionary group got sidelined a lot in !! and now we need !!! for more. and now we have a new idol group for it as well. the story is gonna take 8 years for 1 normal year at this rate

i had no idea any of this was happening. subaru's dad. i genuinely forget about him half the time because no development ever comes from it (that i've seen it's been a while) but do not worry. we have your new househusband/crush to draw more lore from. and another idol group. god help us

[eli-elien]

Ask game - 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 11, 25

[a lot of questions, sorry xD but I love those, they're good ones]

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

Kyo, I would love to draw religiously symbolism-esqe stuff with him and Elijah cuz he's The Bitch that really twists the story up in reverie but I gotta know who is outfitter is why so many belts? Why the tubes? the weird ass accents and cloak, uuuggghdhjghgh

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

Maybe more than 50 I keep to myself, most are doodles without context but I think maybe thats pushing it cuz I did do a worstie without context doodles

one day I'll make a post abt them and the aus I have with them (also general aus for shield hero I've made lol)

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

Hmmmmm off the top of my head I think Belos from TOH considering most of my characters are brunettes with their eyes leaning to blue, another one is just ben tennyson and his overall personality and body of being a twink with an ego who is also extremely self sacrificial altho it differs how much depending on the type of character I actually want and ofc their age

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in

I had an old story called Terminal something something and the mc was a nonbinary kid who was secretly related to an ancient family of warriors that now has to fight the ancient evil that's abt to come back, but is the evil really so evil?

Think of Tales of Arcadia's Trollhunters, Randy cunningham 9th grade ninja and jack long

Say hello to Piper! there were also going to be a set of weapons that get collected over time that cast use but they didn't seem like weapons. For example Piper's was a mask that turned them to the Sun Warrior (able to use it bc of their family blood) and another example is a vase that controls wate! A mirror! A book that has people and things sealed within it able to release said thing and control it with a key! and a painting! theres more but I don't want to have this be too long

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw

PUFFY SLEEVES AND SKIRTS/DRESSES

I love love drawing elaborate lavish dresses

these are old but still hold up well with what I like to give my characters if ever there's a ball :p

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what

Alot of different things depends on the vibe sometimes I listen to classical music esp while animating or doing a piece that's "classical" yknow oooorr esp when it's abt my fave duo

The Worsties Playlist

or hannibal edits on youtube bc hannibal fans have such a way with music and the lines they put in there inspire my characters and art

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

hmmmm I think once I was told my style looks like early 2000s animes like full metal alchemist and ok the story and writing yes but the style I wouldn't say I got inspired by it esp considering my coloring being akin to stuff like cyberpunk and arcane lol

[minsarasarahair]

My thoughts about Belle: Ryuu to Sobakasu Hime (Dragon & Freckled Princess)

Despite imperfections in the plot, I really appreciate that the film has a message to convey. It’s about healing and never about romance. Sometimes a person can only heal themselves by helping other people and that’s exactly what the heroine did. Tbh films or anime lately are focusing on visuals too much so I really love this aspect of Belle. For example, Makoto Shinkai’s overrated Your Name and Weathering With You can be categorized as romance film but there’s no really message in the story. The two protagonists are just shippable and that’s it. Makoto Shinkai’s Garden of Words is different tho. At least even tho it’s romance between an adult woman and young man, it tackles about an adult’s anxiety and young person chasing his dreams in his own way. 

I really love the heroine here. She’s not really pure like how majority perceived her. She’s a flawed heroine. You can see that she show jealousy toward the most popular girl of her school, has bad relationship with her father that most likely her fault, has very low self esteem so she unconsciously hurt her male childhood friend, and she’s having a hard time to recover from the death of her mother. If you see her in this way, she has many toxic traits. I also love that her normal voice when she talks don’t sound beautiful compare to her singing voice.

Supporting characters are very likable. They are more pure compare to the heroine tbh. The side romance between supporting characters are cute lol

Belle and her interactions with Dragon gave me the same vibe the Disney’s Beauty and the Beast animated film has. Belle has big adorable eyes like your typical Disney princess bc they hired the former Disney’s character designer and the animation of her character will make you think about Disney. This aspect can be good or bad bc people will either accuse the film for copying or people will enjoy it just bc they also love the old animated film. I’m the latter of course but sometimes I can’t help but think if that’s acceptable? Is it consider a plagiarism or parody or reference? 

I love Belle’s songs. I love how her emotions overflow when she sings. You can really feel when she’s angry, happy or afraid with those songs. 

Like I said plot is not perfect especially the ending, it left you so many questions unanswered and seems like it’s rushed. Like what happened to the kids she helped?, she just left them there?, where did she got money to leave?, why the kids father become afraid of her? why kids place is in livestream? So many plot holes. I guess it’s open for interpretation but at least we have a clear ending with her dad. 

I think you’ll love the film if you’re into virtual youtuber community bc it’s similar to that. All in all. The film is good. Not best but good. Especially visually. The 3D is actually smooth and decent.  

Almost forgot! I love that Belle’s name is originally BELL but the internet people kinda changed it in however they like it bc that’s internet. As if it tells you “You can’t control how others perceive you.” That internet is a very toxic place which is so true. 

[izukult]

what they get you / what kind of gift they get you for valentine’s day :D

idc ab valentine’s day whether i have a partner or not but i would geek ab it for these mfs

warnings: swearing!! fluff ���

characters: hinata, kageyama, oikawa, suga, tsukishima, bokuto, akaashi, iwaizumi, matsukawa, atsumu

hinata shoyo ♡

this ray of absolute sunshine would see smth from tiktok and be like: yup. perfect. he’d get you like the chocolate box of crystals !! and be like “look at how pretty they are- this one looks like my hair!” and he also gets you some homemade ring from etsy and makes this big deal ab how “HES NOT PROPOSING BUT HE WOULD BUT LIKE- LATER ON BUT HES NOT PROPOSING AT ALL ITS JUST A PRETTY RING” he gives me secondhand embarrassment sometimes. really tho gets so giddy seeing you wear anything he buys you and if anyone ever compliments the ring he loves hearing you say “thanks! my boyfriend got it for me for valentines:)”

kageyama tobio ♡

he gives you this ratty ass old ass volleyball and you are trying your best to give him a convincing smile, but you’re really, really confused? it wasn’t the fact that it was volleyball related, it was just the fact it was so old. he rolls his eyes and turns it in your hands to show the tape on the other side of it. ‘kageyama t. grade 4’ MF GAVE YOU HIS FIRST FUCKING VOLLEYBALL PLSSSS that’s so goddamn cute i’m gonna throw up. you cried idc

oikawa tooru ♡

oikawa tooru is an overcompensating bastard man. no matter what he’s doing, he feels the need to prove himself. he kind of goes too hard for valentines LMAO. flowers and chocolates? yea. a teddy bear? i wouldn’t be surprised. a jersey? you betcha. romantic picnic at night? if you want. a playlist? probably. a necklace? maybe so. your favorite part, though, is the little note he writes you talking about how grateful he is for you that he slipped in your (his) jacket pocket at the end of the night. neither of you bring it up tho- bc emotions 🤢

sugawara koushi ♡

old fashion sweetheart i sure do love this man. i’m sorry to be so vague for this one, but his gift is definitely some very niche, partially homemade idea of some inside joke of yours. he wants you to know it’s personal to him, that he really put a lot of thought into your gift and that he loves you. a cute little stay at home kinda date, and you two make dinner together as you listen to your favorite playlists and laugh. very good fella. love him sm.

tsukishima kei ♡

his gift is that he doesn’t insult u all day😁🤝 no. no it’s not. he still insults you you’re not fucking dying why wouldn’t he? he burns you a cd and then realizes that’s kinda not cool and so he just makes you a playlist. actually explains the reason for each song (not verbally, though) and he brings u strawberry short cake bc he is convinced it’s the pinnacle of desserts he does not care if you like smth more take the gesture.

bokuto kotaro ♡

this lil dummy is so doting. starts your day off by bringing you your favorite coffee or tea and a lil kiss. he buys you guys something matching LMAO like maybe some bracelets or smth and while i am not a big “matching” fanatic and i don’t think bokuto would necessarily be an avid bracelet wearer, but he will not take that bracelet off unless it’s like a tournament game. definitely takes you out to some fancy dinner and also probably gets you kicked out of the restaurant

akaashi keiji ♡

akaashi is very down to earth. so, he knows what you’re going to want. he also knows what he wants to give you. so let’s say you’re really really into smth he rly rly hates, he’ll listen to you talk about it absolutely, but he might not spend money on it? in his eyes, the gift would be just like your relationship— a mutual understanding where two separate people come together. i cant say what it would be specifically (i’m sorry D: if u want my generic answer it would be: a lamp), but it definitely is a representation of what the two of you are together.

iwaizumi hajime ♡

he gives you something disgustingly meaningful. like the kind of nice that makes you want to gag yknow? but you don’t really know how meaningful it is at first?? he gives you like this little “photo book” esque thing, and you KNOW oikawa gave him the idea LMAO. it’s already so cute but at the end there’s just a little piece of paper with a day on it and you’re like what? and he shrugs and goes “wonder what that is? hmm” and you know he’s teasing u so u kinda joke ab it but he won’t tell u. then at the end of your date when he’s dropping you home he kisses you and he’s like “oh yea, that paper??” and you’re like omg yes finally and he looks so nonchalant when he says “yea, kinda weird that i remember this, but that’s the day i fell in love with you🤢” and he nods and laughs and you’re just Staring. you are STARING loss for words but he fucking leaves before you can ask him ab it. this made me physically sick to write bye

matsukawa issei ♡

simpleton scrub. buys you a gag gift or pretends he doesn’t remember. starts breaking out laughing when you try to hide ur disappointed look (it’s ok to punch ppl sometimes😁‼️). his real gift is kinda cliche, but i feel like he really has no idea what he’s doing for like actual relationships even if he tries to hide it. he just gets you like one of those rectangle bar necklace, and he does get his initials on it bc he’s kind of a braggy fuck, but he only does it on one side so you can choose whether to show it or not.

miya atsumu ♡

this man is absolutely a perfectionist. he is so loving, absolutely, but he’s also kind of immature? so, he’s a little nervous to give you a gift because what if yours isn’t as good. LMAO it sounds rude, but he always wants to be pushed to be better and do better, and even tho this is a declaration of affection, he can’t help but attaching competition? so he buys you two gifts- a mediocre one and what he thinks is really good. the mediocre one is just like a stuffed animal and the really good one is personalized, and well thought out, and it just Screams that he loves you. it definitely centers on a passion of yours so i can’t get like a specific example but if you play guitar he like bought you a fucking case youve wanted for months kinda vibe LMAO. also, truth be told, bc he’s a sucker for you, no matter what u get him he’s gonna give u the “mediocre” gift and the other one as well.

[yue-muffin]

well, cherry magic was absolutely devastating and yet another example of why i love jdramas: when they set out to do so, they are full of so much heart and understanding of what it means to be human. i have had so many emotional rollercoasters over the years, but the angst is not usually angst for its own sake; there’s a purpose: to paint a tragedy and make you think ah, if only..., or testing the bonds of friends and family to show that what makes us human can just as easily tear us apart as be the cause for us to overcome obstacles in life.

i usually don’t like romances. i avoid them. which is also why i like jdramas. romance-centric ones are clearly marked and indicated in the summary, if a romance appears in a non romantic drama, it doesn’t often take anything away from the plot or characters. in fact, aside from old bl movies, i’ve never watched a single romance jdrama, no matter how highly recommended.

this got LONG so.

two things: 1) im really glad i gave cherry magic a chance. 2) my mind was blown by how far the japanese romance genre has come in terms of depicting same sex relationships. all you have to do is look to the old bl movies i used to watch- even if the characters are respected within their medium, they all end in tragedy.

so, cherry magic along with several other jdramas coming out or that have come out recently, really impressed me. i stepped away from the jdrama world for a while, and im glad that i slipped back in.

so about the whole drama since ive really been talking about the overall genre - it’s so damn good and relatable, to a painful degree. to me, particularly, who has lived a privileged life and moves through the world without too much fuss, it’s that self-sabotage of adachi’s that really hit me hard. you’re your own worst enemy sometimes. and, indeed, his anxiety is also really relatable. how many times do i always think the worst of my performance, when the grades, the instructors’ assessments, my friends and family, all say i didn’t do as bad as i think in my head? or thinking whatever you do, it’s never going to be enough to match so-and-so’s expectations, and if you fail their expectations you fail them and yourself. man, that spiral of his thoughts in the last two episodes was painful but the resolution of which was so cathartic.

(also, i guess i just have to own up to the fact that i do have some sort of anxiety. i never really talk about myself to others, and to my family who i do, they don’t believe anxiety is even a thing beyond a funny feeling in your gut which is like “wow, really”, but a thing i’ve learned to ignore, except this ongoing pandemic situation has really made it rear its ugly head, which i can normally keep in check ok)

but the drama as a whole...it’s so realistic, and positive. it’s a perfect balance. it handles the “typical” bl tropes well, giving a bit of its original manga flair but taking it to a realistic level. like all the classic kabedons! the mind reading bit is actually really helpful here to break those tropes apart a bit by being able to know kurosawa’s thoughts even tho on the outside he’s mostly as suave as ever

and another thing! it’s so...life-affirming. that it’s ok to not know where you’re going even at age 30, to set little goals for yourself, to pursue happiness in your relationships. the way society is these days, there’s so much pressure to be the best and succeed - even to the point, it’s not just good to be happy with what you’re doing, you must be successful by society’s standard (the minato storyline particularly addressed this)

and i, at least, really need that reminder. i love the career im working towards now, but when i was only 21, i was just about having a breakdown every other week bc i was coming to the end of my undergrad studies and didn’t know where i wanted to go next. it felt like ‘if i don’t make the right choice in these 3 months, it’ll ruin the rest of my life or i’ll just never be happy’. that’s so crazy, thinking back.

and another thing: the characters are all so different, but i found a bit of myself in each of them nonetheless. unlike fujisaki, i do want to be in a relationship someday, but i don’t want one now and i would greatly appreciate people in my life to stop pressuring me into one with their well-intentioned comments. i thought at first that kurosawa wasn’t going to be super deep, just a really nice guy in love, but actually his mask of perfection and need to meet others’ expectations as his self-perceived redeeming qualities really hit hard. and adachi, who is like my spirit animal, his anxiety and worries over whether he’s worth a love that seems so good and perfect, running away rather than face the possibility of getting hurt from that interaction. even rokkaku, who acted all energetic and excited at the drinking party but really just wanted to get the heck out of there

the actors were all just. so good. i mentioned this last time, but they got the perfect balance of comedy moments + realistic reactions/nuanced acting that isn’t exaggerated, for the non-comedy moments. they all did a stellar job of selling this drama!

so, the bad thing is that this has set the bar high on modern romance dramas for me, and considering i don’t give them much of a chance in the first place, lol.

[redxblueihateloveyou]

spill the yoi hot takes :o

I’m really flattered with the amount of asks (I hope you won't mind that I combined at least 5, it's just easier this way), interested in my yoi opinions, I wasn’t planning to get into that honestly, until I mentioned it to my friend Alex (I’ve mentioned him here before without a name tho, he’s gay, he’s very into anime, he was also the one behind that 4am text “but how do u think Rin’s teeth feel on Haru’s dick” lol). 

I just didn't want to rewatch it, as I've said before, but something he said got me very intrigued and last week ended up with me staying until 7am for a virtual watch party that got pretty hilarious, but not for the yoi reasons lol.

So just know that to be completely fair we did it and I'm saying everything below with a very fresh impression, which hasn't changed really bc like I'm 25, I was watching it the first time when I was 21, not 14 xD. I think it got worse actually.

Once again, I know that since they’re both gay sports animes comparisons are inevitable, but to me one has nothing to do with the other and no matter the fact that I adore Free! and don’t like YOI, I don’t want to throw words like smth is “superior” out there, bc I don’t want to be like those YOI fans back in the days, who thought that none other gay ships should exist after this (unless they say smth specifically for me to counterattack, then I can say whatever lol).

Like if you love stories like this, it’s okay. Like what you like. But to yell at everybody that they must think that this is how relationships should be and trash every other gay ship in existence, you maybe should not, especially when you don’t really have much to be proud of. Just like kisses don’t make a love story high-quality, full censorship doesn’t take away a good love story.

"Heaven official’s blessing” is also censored, but no matter how much you censor it, their love for each other is seen in their actions so clear, that it is in fact will not take anything away from the power of their feelings and the greatness of their love story if at the end they won’t show them kissing. Just like if I kiss a random stranger on the street, it won’t make us the best couple in the world.

Now I went into watching YOI unbiased the 1st time I watched it (I did watch it after Free, bc it was in “recommended”). I did not expect it to be “like Free”, I just wanted smth that’ll give me the same kind of emotion, investment in the story, ship, etc. It didn’t, so I just moved on.

I didn’t even think deep about why. I thought I just grew out of the “Cinderella” stories a long time ago or as it was here not very gracefully called “how to turn the pig into the prince”.

Like if you want the “she’s all that” but with the boy instead of a girl, you’ll probably enjoy YOI. But once again, love stories I enjoy are the opposite of those. It's really nothing bad, if you enjoy the stuff like “Someday my prince will come” in whatever age tbh, but I since a certain age just wasn’t invested in those anymore and began to obsess with stories like “Anastasia” instead, and I’m talking about love stories with less naivety in between and feelings out of nowhere, but more stuff like “yes, bitch, I find you attractive, true, but whether I fall for you unconditionally or not, only real life situations will tell later on”.

And I don’t mean stuff like going through war together or some epic journey, but grown ups must know those. Those life situations or even tiny things someone do, that make you not only fall for someone, but think “yeah, I can imagine my life with you”.

Like in my humble opinion, you can’t fall in love with someone bc of the way they swim or skate, for example. What ppl call “love at first sight” is in fact “attraction at first sight”. So yes, we do joke about Rin falling in love at first sight, bc he did in fact walked into the hall, saw Haru and was like “dat bitch is so fine”, even tho he was just standing there, but once again, he was just attracted to him. What happens after this is you can go on a whole beautiful journey with tiny Rin putting together the prettiest puzzle of why he falls for Nanase Haruka. In such little things like when Haru slowed down when he saw Nagisa feeling bad during running and Rin was like “omg you’re so uwu”, how he mentions that he always helps ppl, but never asks for help himself, he slowly gradually paints a picture of what kind of person Haru is, same goes for Haru about Rin. And then you have a whole story of them falling for each other all over again when they’re already adults, and you again watch it through their eyes, and once again I’m not in fact talking about some grand gestures like 1x12, I’m talking about stuff like them focusing on Haru’s eyes shaking, when he saw that Rin secretly helps Rei to learn how to swim. It’s the little things, that you watch and you get why they feel what they feel for each other. And that also makes you fall in love more with their characters by seeing how the other sees them.

YOI doesn’t have those moments. Not only they weren’t in any situations that would make them know each other for who they really are, they hardly even know the basic info about one another. Hell, the viewer doesn’t know anything about them. And this is why to me it goes into the category of those typical romcoms I can’t get invested in.

So I don’t think these two can be compared. And while some yell “bc you’re not canon, but yoi is canon”, I think they can’t be compared for another reason. Bc some ppl are trying to prove to me that a 27 years old man fell head over heels in love with someone overnight during a drunk banquet, then watched a vid of him skating and flew to another country and hey “if you win a gold medal, lets get married”. This is not the kind of relationship progression I’m looking for like at all. Between that time he started training him and their “censored kiss” there was nothing and I mean nothing that’d made me go “yeah, I see why he loves him”.

But anyways, lets live piecefully really, you can like one, you can like both, it’s all okay.

Like I know many have ptsd and it’s true that back when YOI was popular, most of their fans for real did annoy to death almost everyone, bc they yelled that No.6 is trash, when someone said “but you’re not the only one gay story that’s not based on sex”. They yelled that Free! has no right to exist bc its queerbating (LOL). By that time, I’m not gonna lie I was ready to poke my eyes out each time I saw smth YOI related, bc it was like: you make a multigay shipping vid -  “how dare u not include YOI”, you make a gifset - “you forgot YOI” like I HAD TO like it just bc it’s gay. There is no such rule to me. Just like I don’t care for some hetero romances, I don’t care for some gay romances. Simple is that. Once again gay has nothing to do with the relationships dynamic and the story.

Yeah, comments about fanservice. Like why should I watch Victor’s naked ass for several minutes every episode, but don’t get to see Haru or Rin’s at least once? So salty rn.

Free is more fanservice-y.. well, it’s hella fanservicy, yes, but like we can’t swim in shirts, you can tho not show naked ass in each episode, I thought you were skating. 

See, it’s all debatable.

But I do wish ppl stop putting yoi relationships on a piedestal, their relationship are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too far from being inspirational for many and not even close to the what love is in my opinion. If you seek smth of a very high standart of gay love, choose MDZS for example, idk. But don’t throw YOI at ppls faces as a “this is how should be”. Not everyone wants that.

I don’t need a half-assed engagement and esp the censored kiss (like either do it or don’t do it at all honestly). Also stuff like this should carry weight. I don’t want things for the sake of things.

Like to me Rin’s “the only thing that hasn’t changed in my life is how I feel about you” speech, considering the fact that he felt like that throughout all those years, means hella more, than this. 

I think 1stly, it’s because of the “it’s like it was a destiny xD” factor and 2ndly, bc at least this scene gives a little more sense to the fact that he flew to another country to train him. Now it’s if “I fell MADLY in love in one drunk night and was pining my whole life after that and that vid was a sign for me to go see you again” makes any sense to you. At least that’s how some fans read it.

Once again it might be a good thing for a passable one-time romantic comedy. But plots and pairings like this is what made me turn to anime in the first place, so.. sorry lol.

All this mega tragic posts of “Victor was soooo in love for such long time, it’s so sad” made me laugh so hard. Like he feel in love so hard during a one drunk banquet with a guy who was so drunk he didn’t remember anything he did? WHY? HOW? what could he possibly do to make him fall that hard, no one knows. Like to me the only reason u can fall for someone in one night is if you saw him risking his life saving a kitten or a puppy from a car or smth.

I’m just not the kind of person who thinks you can fall for someone for no reasons. Again, you can find someone attractive and go from there, but there must be things along the way that will make me believe in the progression of it. It can of course all come in the future, but the story was what the story was. Whatever you are trying to add to it is already a fanfiction.

YOI is not boring per se, bc everything goes way too fast and sometimes with no reasoning, so I was more surprised that “this was it?” lmao. But their relationships are dull, yes. Bc there is nothing to even discuss really, you can only assume things, bc the whole thing didn’t give u much, esp in the characters department. It’s just really funny to me that someone would write a whole post of “I love this character bc I presume he’s like that”, usually it’s “I love this character bc facts, facts, facts”.

______

Now back to the beginning of my post and to the funny story that happened. We were randomly discussing shit, when I mentioned about possibly rewatching YOI, bc I didn’t want to start talking about smth in case I forgot some stuff (I didn’t btw lol) and turned out that he freaking disliked it a lot. I never even asked, for some reason, and we’ve been yelling about Free! and other stuff for ages and like his boyfriend is in love with Sousuke and they both adore rinharu to death.

And he has lots of gay friends who love Free (this made me happy the most, btw during our YOI chat I asked and it was 4:1 harurin:rinharu haha I win) and some ships from Haikyuu too, but turns out that literally none of them were into YOI. And the funniest thing he said was “bc it felt more heterosexual than some heterosexual stories I’ve watched”. Now I don’t know if it would make sense to anyone else out there, but I kinda did get what he meant.

I asked if it was bc of the “fairytale setting” and the fact that no one cared that they’re gay (bc “in front of the stadium?!” was the reaction, when I told them “there was a cencored kiss here” (btw not everyone got it lolz) and then “did they just write the story with a girl, but then changed it by the end?”), but they said “no, just the overall feeling”.

And like everyone knows that YOI targeted audience is hetero girls. It wasn’t made for the sake of the LGBT community and none of the homophobic ppl will watch it either, no matter what some think. So for whom they did it the way they did it is very questionable tbh. They say it’s the LGBT representation in anime, and yes, good, great, always happy about, but isn’t it kinda funny that some of LGBT representatives don’t even feel like it apparently.

Now I’m just saying some, I’ve asked him to ask around out of curiousity, and it was only 11 gay guys in total, who watched it, including our company and his bf who was forced into it haha, but 11 is quite a lot, considering the fact that not even 1 liked it. But then somehow stuff like MDZS and even uncanonical mikayuu was highly appreciated and loved, bc it accidentally made a dent in some extra conservative parents and dull ppl.

It’s just much more interesting to hear what guys who are actually dating guys think about all those kind of animes and ships, than some girls here who yell at me stuff like “why are you supporting queerbating”. Btw I asked Alex if he’s offended by that, he said “no, but we for real think they’re doing it” lmao.

It is supposed to be funny. You didn’t get it wrong. But if you saw many ppl would aggressively disagree with you. I just thought that “analysis” was an “interpretive process that draws conclusions from a set of facts”, not “writing a fanfiction based on assumptions”, but then again to each their own. 

The problem is that I don’t even get what’s cute about it, it’s just absurd to me. Like it’s pulled out of an ass, for real. They’re not in the stage of a relationships, when I would find such thing romantic. And all the agressive denying of the fact that it was indeed wedding rings made this scene cringy, too. The whole thing is cringy to me idk. The “win the gold, only then we’ll get married”.... It all gave me a weird feeling. The opposite of “touching”.

So in conclusion, when you skip most of the important parts of the love story and jump into stuff just for the sake of it, then also make fun of it, it leaves a hella weird impression and aparently not just to me.

And once again trying to market some primitive story as an epic love story, just bc it’s gay is extremely weird to me. If you make 50 shades of grey gay, it’s not gonna suddenly become a pulitzer prize winning kind of book, it’ll stay the same dumb af story with dumb af characters, but gay.

So being happy about some representation (and btw they still managed to add stuff like “its not gay if you exchange rings with your hommies” here and there and make it “hahahaha joking”), I get it, but to say that this what all the gay ships should aim for, pls stop. We really don’t wanna. Sincerelly. 

We here stick to a motto “I can picture the kiss of the characters whose story is so amazing, that the kiss is the only thing missing, but if I basically have just a picture of two guys kissing, I won’t write a whole story myself.”

P.S. I will forever laugh now tho at the fact that calling your bf a “pig” and being an arogant asshole without any canonically established reasonings is a great relationships, but Adam with his past gets what he gets now for the “dog” comments even tho his bf enjoys it lmao like I did not remember this bits in YOI. I honestly thought it was like completely “unproblematic” one, but it’s like hilariously not. So what ppl are trying to even put out their as a “pinnacle of the lgbt representation” as you say, like there are for real older yaois that are much better than this.

[tfw-no-tennis]

ani....morphs.....

ok so picking up after the david trilogy, which hit hard as FUCK, we have book 23, which basically was a semi truck that ran over my corpse, jesus christ, they really followed up the david trilogy w/all that....

23 was so so good and also painful. its the culmination of a lot of tobias’s characterization in the series thus far and also we finally get the reveal we’ve been waiting for about elfangor....ooooh man 

and there was a lot of painful stuff in this book but the worst imo was tobias wondering if it were possible that somebody wanted him and would take care of him, only to have it all come crashing down in the worst way when it turned out aria was visser three in morph, ouch. 

that was so brutal augh. and when he figured it out and just crash landed and kept thinking about how he wanted to die and how he was stupid to think he could have a home...bro get these kids some THERAPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

so yeah that book was absolutely brutal but also so good...and it further fleshed out the animorphs working as a near-flawless team, w/the whole setup of tobias meeting w/the lawyer being so airtight and well-planned 

also more free hork bajir!! its cool that there's stuff happening w/them offscreen, I like that 

I literally had to take a break from reading the books bc the david triology + 23 was like so much, and also bc the olympics were on and all my time got dedicated to watching those, but then I opened 24, not sure what to expect, and BAM it was the helmacrons lmaoooo

I don't even remember the helmacrons but ig a lot of people hate them? lmao so that whole reputation preceded the book and I was like oh wow time for a change in tone

which wasn't wrong but also I liked that book?? I was never bored, even tho the whole thing was patently ridiculous and also had very little bearing on the overarching story

but I think it would be a standout if it were a TV episode w/a good budget - the visuals were amazing even in text, and I can imagine all the cool shrinking/growing/cellular stuff would be WICKED cool visually (ideally 2d animation but an ant man-esque live action adaptation wouldn't be terrible if they had the budget for it)

whatever let me dream. so yeah I didn't hate the helmacron book even tho the helmacrons themselves were...sure something. lmao I think they come back? that should be interesting

next book is the arctic one, we have yet another alien of the week style adventure - I liked this one too, it felt like more plot-y stuff happened since they destroyed the base, and marco’s POV is always fun 

I do find it funny/interesting how sometimes when the animorphs do something - like in this book, destroying that base in the arctic - it doesn't really seem to impact the yeerks much/it doesn't get brought up much after that. and then other things like them destroying the ground-based kandrona get mentioned a lot (that example is understandable tho bc that WAS a big deal). its just hilarious to me how blowing up entire building complexes has become so routine that it isn’t even worth mentioning at this point

Also I adore when they meet other random people/kids and are chill w/them, like w/that kid they met in the rain forest earlier on w/the time travel 

the descriptions of the brutally cold weather were great. I hate the cold so I was like oof this is a nightmare lmao

also ig that was the first ghostwritten book and I did kinda notice it was slightly different than usual? maybe? I could be imagining it tho 

okay but book 26 tho...BOOK 26. bruh 

that was SO good and I really didn’t know what to expect - but when we finally revisited Jake’s dream w/crayak I knew it was gonna be good (but I didn’t expect it to be a chess game war epic..!)

basically I loved it. SUCH a good Jake book - I really appreciate his character now as opposed to when I was 10 and often overlooked him (sorry jake).

similarly, when I was a kid and read these I sympathized a lot w/the chee and felt bad for them towards the end of the series when they had to get more involved in the war (genuinely don’t remember what they even do but ik I felt bad) 

but now I've basically 180′d and I'm like damn those chee sure are hypocrites huh. 

like they could solve So many of the animorphs problems but their stringent adherence to nonviolence leads to them actively getting in the animorphs way sometimes? and obviously pacifism is a complicated topic, but in this case it also intersect w/the whole ‘child soldier’ thing, and as beings who are insanely old and wise, the chee probably shouldn't just leave all the dirty work to a bunch of literal middle schoolers

aaaaanyways. there’s so much I love about this book. the iskoort! they were sure something. and the ‘plot twist’ that they are actually 2 beings, the Isk and the Yoort - and the Yoort are essentially Yeerks - that slapped. the symbiosis of it all! 

I loved the part where they all realize what this means, that this is why Crayak wants the iskoort destoryed - because someday the yeerks might come across them and realize parasitism is not the only way. I love it! 

alas I don’t recall the iskoort returning in the story (but also my memory is terrible so who knows?) but still that would be cool

basically I feel like this is the book where Jake Truly comes into his own as a leader, in every sense. he outmaneuvers Crayak, and even the ellimist, who’s yanking them around in his own way

the scene where jake shoves the howler off the cliff and jumps off and morphs and acquires the howler...that was fantastic and tense. 

also the murder is definitely becoming more overt. I mean, it has been for a while, but it isn’t really pointed out as much anymore. oof

more on the chee - as Jake points out in this book, and other characters point out in other books - the chee could have saved the pemalites, but instead just stood by while their creators were slaughtered. on the other hand, jake says, what do the chee do AFTER they’ve killed the howlers - where to point them next? when is the end of their violence? 

buuuuut also standing by while atrocities occur is pretty damning, as is frequently mentioned in this series - from the very beginning, when marco initially doesn’t want to get involved in the war at all, and the other animorphs basically tell him that turning his back on the war and acting like he doesn’t even know it’s happening would be immoral and cowardly (which imo this reaction helps to push marco in the direction he ends up going, but I digress) - this topic comes up again in 19 when cassie quits the team and rachel is upset bc she sees it as cassie elevating her own feelings above the greater good (as in, as long as cassie feels good about how she acts, it doesn’t matter how much preventable evil the yeerks are committing while she turns away). etc etc. but that’s essentially what’s happening w/the chee - even tho they help w/intel, the lack of any sort of Action on their part means that they’re essentially allowing awful things to happen when they could prevent them. this is rambly but basically...animorphs deals so much in grey areas, and the chee are noticeably black and white in their actions, despite falling, in a meta sense, in an extremely grey area. its such good, thought provoking writing!

anywayssss I keep talking about the chee lmao what else was there. oh YEAH jake and cassie kissed for the first time awww that was super cute 

and ofc immediately marco teases them as asks jake if he’s gonna kiss him next, and all I can say is...marco is a bicon 

also I love the background worldbuilding w/the iskoort, how they have all these groups and guilds and stuff - its not dwelled on much, which actually works really well to give the world/species a sense of lived-in realness 

okay oh man and the reveal at the end that the howlers were just like...children who thought the whole thing was a game...AUGHH man that’s sooo fucked 

like, when jake morphs the howler and has rachel ready to knock him down in grizzly morph if he gets out of control due to the howler’s murderous instincts, and he morphs to find that the howler is...playful, like a dolphin morph. SUCH a good fucked up sense of dawning horror there 

and the fact that as far as I can tell the chee KNEW this, but wanted revenge anyways, so they let the animorphs assume that the howlers were Evil On Purpose

also I love smaller moments, like jake seeing that ax is ashamed for briefly running away during one battle w/the howlers, and then entrusts him w/an important task bc he knows that ax will see that as redemption - and when everyone thought jake was dead and were so happy when he wasn't (they all love each other so much im gonna cry about these child soldiers augh)

basically that book was so good

man one thing I absolutely love is that the longer the series goes on the more obvious it is that andalites, despite inventing morphing technology, barely use it themselves 

like, most of the andalite characters we see barely morph. its kind of a last resort to them, as they’re already plenty dangerous in their regular forms 

meanwhile for the animorphs, that’s all they have to fight with. that’s their only weapons against the yeerks, and its so fun to see them use the power in so many varied ways, and so creatively, while the andalites have barely scratched the surface of their own technology

its also interesting to contrast against the yeerks who start out w/absolutely no technology, and the andalites share some but not all of their technology w/them...its too bad that morphing technology was just starting out cause that would’ve been interesting

like imo a lot of the conflict w/the yeerks could’ve been avoided if they could just nothlit into better forms - of course, there’d still be plenty of yeerks who want to go start wars or w/e, just like pretty much any species in the series, but a lot of yeerks would probably be like ‘yeah I'm good’ and just chill out as nothlits

also people online love to talk about how humans are alienfuckers and would definitely have sex w/sentient aliens and whatnot, and while I'm not saying that's untrue, its just funny bc in animorphs the truest alienfuckers are definitely the andalites

as of the hork-bajir chronicles, we now have a second instance of an andalite morphing another species to be in an inter-species alien romance (and eventually have kids) 

speaking of, I don’t think I’ve talked abt the hork bajir chronicles yet??? even tho I read it a while ago lmao 

HBC was great...I honestly haven’t really run into an animorphs book I’ve actually disliked at this point, I’m sure it’ll come w/all the ghostwriting and whatnot, but I’ve liked at least some aspects of every book

anyways HBC was great, and it’s funny bc I remember that I read this book as a kid, and yet rereading it now I didn’t remember a single bit of it lmaooo

I really liked the framing device of the free hork bajir telling this story to tobias. I also liked how we know from the beginning that this story wont have a happy ending - we know all the hork bajir end up enslaved by the yeerks, but it’s still somehow hopeful at the end? I think this is largely due to the framing device tbh. 

also I love toby, and I love that the First free hork bajir named their kid after tobias ;_; 

and oooh mannn I LOVED the different POVs from this book. all the characters were so interesting! aldrea was fascinating - I really like the increasingly negative view of the andalites that the readers are getting, all while maintaining the sense that they aren’t like, actively evil, just that they have their issues - like aldrea’s arrogance, and the general andalite arrogance which lead to the loss of the hork bajir. also, who knew andalites had their own brand of sexism? Ls

I did like getting a female andalite tho, that was cool. and dak was really cool, he was such a good, compassionate character who was able to maintain his morals in an interesting way throughout the story

and VISSER THREE...or should I say esplin 9466, because he’s not visser 3 yet...getting his ‘origin story’ was excellent - I really like how we’re learning about visser 3 backwards - we start off the series w/him as the main villain, and he’s campy and menacing, and then we see him in the andalite chronicles as a power-hungry sub-visser trying to climb the ranks and eventually getting alloran as a host, and then back even further here, w/the start of his focus on the andalites and the beginning of his ambition. its been very cool and interesting to see

plus, the beginning of the yeerks as we know them! seerow! alloran! it’s a party and nobody is having a good time, except for some of the yeerks. 

I like how it’s pretty obvious that the andalites are well-meaning with their interactions w/the yeerks, but go about it the wrong way - they give them enough technology that the yeerks realize there’s a whole world out there to experience, and then they blockade the yeerks on their planet and tell them they can’t leave. nnnnot the best approach imo

again, as I said above, I’m interested in how things could’ve gone if the andalites had given the yeerks morphing technology early on - could a lot of the conflict have been avoided, or would it have been worse? the yeerks seem pretty evil in this book, immediately jumping to enslave anyone they can. otoh we hear from esplin that not all yeerks like having host bodies, and find it overwhelming, preferring to swim around in the yeerk pool as a slug - I assume as host bodies became more available this type of thinking was probably stamped out in yeerk society or w/e, but there are a lot of interesting what-ifs in the situation 

I loved the scene where esplin first experiences having a host, and immediately knows he can’t go back. there are a bunch of great sensory descriptions, and it’s a nice scene to pinpoint as a foundational moment for the visser three in the current story, who spent a lot of time and energy getting what he sees as the best possible host body, an andalite

I find it interesting how much visser three clearly respects the andalites, even while constantly deriding them. and you can see the origins of that here as he immediately focuses in on the andalites, working to become an expert on them in order to make himself useful enough to move thru the ranks

another thing I like is how esplin seems a lot more crafty and ambitious than the visser three from modern times - I would guess that reaching his goal (andalite host body) and being given all that power was detrimental, playing on his weaknesses instead of his strengths. basically, I don’t think it’s ooc or anything, I can see how HBC-esplin became animorphs-esplin, especially w/TAC in between

as for seerow...poor dude. you really do have to feel for him, because you get the sense he really did just want to be kind to the yeerks, but it was borne from a place of pity, and he (and the other andalites) consistently held too much power over the yeerks for the species relations to ever be truly equal and functional 

AUGH I have so many thoughts about alien space politics. omg. I need to talk about the actual story lmao

so yeah I also feel for aldrea, she had a rough time, watching her entire family die and being thrown into a hopeless war

and then the andalite council or w/e not listening to her bc she's a girl AND seerow’s daughter...oof

also, I really really liked the running theme of the andalites - specifically aldrea - looking down on the hork bajir as ‘simple’ and constantly underestimating them, especially dak

and I like how this is portrayed as a bad attitude for aldrea to have, and she still remains and interesting and sympathetic character even while having obvious flaws. it’s about being 3-dimensional baby!

and oh man I love that dak realizes that aldrea looks down on him, and his entire species, but he can see that that’s how the andalites are, and it all connects back to the beginning of the story w/the yeerks, bc the andalites looked down on the yeerks and treated them with pity and kept them pinned under their proverbial thumb ‘for their own good’ and look how that turned out 

but dak is wise and kind enough to not hate aldrea for this, even acknowledging when she’s using him, but not pushing her away because he recognizes good in her too - and she ends up changing, partially because of his faith in her

and I feel like it can all be compared to that scenario of like - a hypothetical creature that lives in a 2D world suddenly being thrust into a 3D world, and comprehending what its seeing, and understanding that there’s so much more out there outside of the flat lines of its world - and then its dropped back into 2D-land with the knowledge of all the stuff its missing out on, and no way to get back to it or explain it to anybody else

I loooove that ‘trope’ or w/e you wanna call it, and it’s done beautifully here w/the yeerks - whos the say they wouldn't have been fine in their pool swimming around; as esplin said, a lot of the yeerks were terrified of having a host, it was only from the andalites’ perspective that their lives were sad and pitiful, and the andalites showed them what the world could be like, and then said ‘no, you can’t travel the stars like we do, you have to stay here on your planet and do what we say.’

and then again, w/the hork bajir - dak talks about how, even though he drinks up the knowledge that aldrea gives him, in the end it might have been better to just have lived peacefully, not knowing what was in the sky or the Deep - as aldrea says: “It was too late for Dak: he knew that the stars were not flowers.” 

plus the hork bajir having to go from a completely peaceful species who don’t even understand the concept of violence, to a bunch of soldiers fighting a war...oof 

basically everyone in this story uses the hork bajir. the yeerks use them as hosts, the andalites use their planet as a convenient place to dump seerow and then take their sweet time coming to help, and the arn created them as means to stabilize the planet, but block them off from their society and refuse to help when the yeerks come

like, the arn modifying themselves to be un-infestable by the yeerks and then being enslaved for physical labor instead? oof guys. if they had teamed up w/the hork bajir resistance things might have gone better, but probably not 

more on aldrea - throughout the story I was always thinking ‘how am I supposed to see her? as a good person, or as a bad person?’ 

as a POV character, especially a ‘good guy’ andalite, you just start off automatically thinking of her as a good person, but as the story goes on, she starts getting lost in revenge and begins using dak and the hork bajir, and you’re left wondering if this is a story about her slide into darkness, and then towards the end of the story her character development culminates in her making the decision to stay w/the hork bajir, and the be with dak, and that’s about when I went ‘ohhh right this is animorphs so every character is pretty much gonna be grey’

I feel like that moral grey-ness was on full display w/aldrea, and I really enjoyed that. I love so much when characters who are good do bad things, for good or bad reasons, especially in media like animorphs that’s aimed at kids. it’s so compelling. 

oof, and the ending when aldrea convinces dak to mobilize the hork bajir and teach them violence...and dak asks her if she’s ever killed another andalite, and she’s horrified, and says of course she hasn’t, and he says that that’s what she’s asking him, and all the hork bajir, to do - to kill their own people, even if they are being controlled by the yeerks. biiiig oof. I love that dak can keep up w/aldrea and her andalite supremacy attitude - it seems that the non-andalite characters who get along best w/the andalites are the ones who wont take their bs 

what else happened....oh my god how could I forget about alloran, and his quantum virus. oooof. I like how we find out about alloran in parallel to visser three, in the same backwards way - in animorphs he’s the tragic host of visser three, in TAC he’s the disgraced but still semi-respected war-prince who becomes the first ever andalite controller, and here he’s the guy who decides to commit some war crimes because, hey, we haven’t tried that yet 

but yeah that was fucked up, I love it. I’ve said it before I think but I like that alloran isn’t some perfect martyr tragically taken by the yeerks - it’s a lot more compelling that he’s a very flawed person who was taken as a controller partially due to his own bloodthirstiness. 

but yeah, the part where aldrea morphs alloran and ‘sneaks’ into that room was great. aldrea’s dedication to disposing of the virus is a great indicator of her character development - it really feels like the straw that broke the camels back w/re: to the andalites not being what she thought they were, w/their tardiness coming to help the hork bajir planet and the way her father was treated being the precursors to this realization. it all culminates nicely in aldrea saying ‘fuck this actually’ and nothlit-ing into a hork bajir.

and it’s really tragic but realistic that even though aldrea and dak end up seeing eye to eye at the end and getting together, the virus ends up being released anyways (and fails in its objective to stop the yeerks from using the hork bajir - the whole thing was p much a lose-lose situation oof), and aldrea and dak still die fighting a hopeless war 

but then we have the free hork bajir on earth, including toby, who, like tobias, has andalite ancestry, but no DNA to show for it - I like that they have that connection as well as tobias being her namesake

so yeah I enjoyed that one and its many-layered themes

WOW this got long uuuuuhhh ok I think i’ll leave this one off here. at the time I’m actually finishing the writing and editing, I’m on book 35 lol so I have some backlogging to do. never fear, I have a lot to say....

[transsexualhamlet]

me going off about yoichi again

What the fandom sees Yoichi as: basic ass katy perry song from 2014

What Yoichi actually is: Karma by ajr

I mean, I don’t really know how this applies to the fandom now, but it’s definitely anime fans and most yoichi fans. I just, I wanted to watch a yoichi amv because I was working on Yoichi stuff but like. I could not find a SINGLE one that was even voiced by a guy?

Now, in general, that’s not an issue, just because he’s a guy obviously doesn’t mean that he can’t have a girl song because that would be dumb to say so. But that’s just not something I see for anyone else. When I see Mika or Guren or Yu centric amvs and stuff, there’s plenty of edgy boi songs and shit. Sometimes Mika gets sexy bitch songs as a joke, but when they’re actually trying to be about that character, they’re all songs sung by dudes. 

And I mean, I just...

Here.

Yeah so @autpunk-godling​ and I like to complain about kagami I know but right now I’d like to complain about the fandom

I don’t really think it’s any of you on tumblr to be honest but it’s just the shit I’ve seen from a few years ago

Yes we’ve established that Yoichi isn’t a smol baby bean boi so fucking stop, a lot of people just kinda ignore that but even without the manga, even without taking into consideration a single thing he said in chapter 51 onwards, the way that the fandom likes to see him is just... not right.

yeah I’m defending him bc i’m a yoichi kinnie go off ig

Jupiter’s response pretty much sums it up but basically it boils down to

1. fangirls who see yoichi, think “gay”, and think they know his entire character because of a stereotype, honestly this was probably something to do with kagami, I feel like I’ve heard around for a long time Yu was supposed to have a fucking harem like guren and they just basically never developed yoichi beyond ‘clearly is gay for yu as a plot point for like three episodes before forgetting about him after school arc’

2. The fans basically just thinking that he just ✨ tried harder ✨ not to have trauma and now he’s fucking fine, I was glad to see that wasn’t the case but people don’t understand how or why it happened, I’ll gladly explain

3. People forget so easily how terrible he had it. It’s not just “gay boy fucking mans up” it’s “gay boy is consistently told for eight years that he’s completely useless if he can’t kill things and every trait he has is terrible because it’s weak and associated with gayness so he internalizes that to an unhealthy degree”

I mean, I’ll try to explain how I see his character, but yeah.

Back to my “I don’t understand how people were suprised when Yoichi admitted he would have killed himself if Yu hadn’t showed up” point... do you remember what he was like back in school arc?

He was not ok. Bro, that guy was so soft and scared. He didn’t want to hurt or offend anyone. He didn’t want to get into any conflict and his first instinct was to submit to abuse or run away. He was desperate for validation and friendship, and he fell for things like bullying easily because he wouldn’t fight back and he wanted someone to like him so bad. He didn’t really want to be in the army, he was glad he got saved even if his sister didn’t make it, he didn’t truly want revenge. Obviously he wasn’t over it, but he didn’t think “boy howdy do I want to kill a vampire”. 

The only reason that he got so stuck on that was because it’s been pounded into his head from moment one. He got called every manner of weak, weakling, wuss, crybaby you can think of by not just shitty high schoolers but by authority figures. They live in a militarized society where your worth is determined by your physical and mental strength, so people with disabilities, mental illnesses, shit like that- they’re not doing so hot. Their way of dealing with Kids Have Trauma is “get over it” or “seek revenge against the vampires who did it”. This is actually a thing Kureto stated very clearly at the beginning of resurrection when he gave his dumbass speech to a bunch of traumatized 11 year olds right after the catastrophe. He’s weaponizing a bunch of kids by putting all these ideas into their head- giving them all fucking hero and martyr complexes because it makes them better soldiers. He tells them that they should want to get revenge and they should be strong and suck it up and use strong emotions against them.

So Yoichi basically grew up conditioned to absolutely fucking hate himself because that’s the ideal. He isn’t like that, and so he sees Yu who is basically the shining example of that kind of thinking, at that point in time. Basically just toxic masculinity central. He’s aggressive and strong, is much quicker to pull a sword on someone than hold out a hand, doesn’t want to make friends, he’s serious and dead set on revenge, he doesn’t cry in front of people and he uses his trauma as a weapon. Yu’s actually a total dick at the beginning of the story, to be honest, and I was surpised to find out the shit he said straight to Yoichi’s face. “give up” “weaklings like you would only get in the way” “nice guys like you shouldn’t be here” “we’re not here to make friends” basically telling him to suck it up or leave, bro, the dude was a fucking jackass to Yoichi, and Yoichi internalizes everything these people say to him, he believes every terrible thing people say.

And Yoichi still completely idolizes him because that’s everything Yoichi isn’t, as this obviously queer coded side character, and everything Yoichi is told he’s supposed to be. *clears throat* toxic masculinity

So in the beginning of the story Yoichi aspires to people like Yu and Kimizuki who are very,,, not open with their emotions. Gee whiz I wonder why he’s keeping up this facade to all his friends instead of trying to sit down and talk about how fucked up he is now. But let’s now talk about how Yoichi got to be the way he is now.

People, again, seem to think that when he got a demon he just decided to stop being traumatized or something, that he just finally got the strength to deal with that and it wasn’t a problem again because he gained confidence. But uh... remember what actually snapped him out of being possessed? You’d immediately go to Yu, but when Yu said all those idealistic things about friendship, Yoichi was still pointing his weapon at Yu. What actually stopped him?

Right after that, it was Guren telling him that becoming a demon was the equivalent to running away and hiding. (which, well, guren, I have a few things to say about that but)

He didn’t stop having those internalized ideals, the things he’d been told over years didn’t just go away or suddenly work at “fixing” him. He was just accused another time of being weak. He didn’t get over or resolve his trauma in any way, he just found a different way to deal with it, with a demon. The reason this actually works for him is that if you’ve literally ever looked closely at the times Yoichi interacts with demon stuff, he’s very innately talented at it, which is odd. He was completely immune to Guren’s test, he came back from being possessed out of sheer force of will, he learned manifestation by himself, he talks to his demon like he’s the one that Gekkouin should be scared of. He finally found something he was good at, that made him strong, and boy, he really clung to that one. He found a way to make himself the ideal they all wanted: in control, powerful, an asset to the team, stuck on revenge and without hesitation to kill- even if it’s not really something he should aspire to be. He just hides the fact that it’s a problem even more because it’s not something he’s supposed to talk about. because. toxic masculinity-

And so if you realize that, it’s not very surprising to see that reveal coming the whole time.

Simply put, if you liked yoichi, y’all should have realized he was never ok. Boy’s got issues. He’s a really complex character that, well, kagami kind of fails to do justice, but the fandom just kind of warps into smol uwu bean boi I could go on but my brain isn’t working so take this

[bitchiha]

HC of Kiba, Shino, Choji, Neji and Lee playing animal crossing. Do they do it hidden from others or not? Their islands, favorite activities, group interactions (especially) and other things you like.

A/N: Yes!! Thank you for requesting this!! I love writing little fun things like this. I haven’t gotten a chance to play animal crossing on the switch because I was saving up for it w/ my job and everything, but now that Corona has shut down my province I can’t actually buy the switch or Animal Crossing 🥺 I watch gameplays for like hours on end tho and my friends never shut up about it so I know enough to make these HC’s I Hope lmfao and I’ve played it on my DS and phone for timee so I’m educated dw

✎ Animal Crossing x Naruto Characters!

Kiba Inuzuka

He was so pumped for animal crossing to come out. Probably used man the beast clone justu in the game store to make sure that he got his hands on a copy.

He won’t hide that he plays Animal Crossing, he’ll be such a confident douche about it. Once he’s got a fly outfit and he’s starting to get gains he will flex his island to anyone, especially Shino.

He would pick an island in the northern hemisphere and he wouldn’t even strategize tbh like he’s just excited

He would name it like “Dog Land” or “Akamaruville” or some shit like that

He’s the type to read all the things the characters say out loud. Will also 10/10 respond to them.

He’s so excited at little things “look akamaru! It’s a stick!” “Oh shit! Wow! It’s a fishy!”

Or when the seasons change he is so hyped

Hates Tom Nook (greedy capitalist) and also hates Eugene

Starts calling people by nicknames from animal crossing. “Sure, Bunyip!” “Sure thing daddio!” And only the other ninja who play Animal Crossing will get it

Everyone else will be like: (;-;) shut the fuck up dog boy did you just call me “daddio?”

His title on his animal crossing passport is “photogenic animal” I felt the need to include this information

Sometimes I don’t even know what the fuck Kiba does on animal crossing like he just messes around all the time

I think he’ll like fishing a lot tho

Despises the snooty or cranky villagers like he wants to pop one at them through the screen

Having interactions w friends on Animal Crossing can either be fun and friendly or super passive aggressive

Him and Shinos interactions are so ducking passive aggressive like Shino is hitting Kiba with his bug net and Kibas like ?? And Shino will just be like “there was a bug on you” like bruh

Him and Chojis interactions are friendly at first until he realizes how much better Choji is doing than him and he gets so aggressive so Chojis like: aight imma head out

Refuses to let Rock Lee get into his island and it makes Lee so ducking mad bc he wants to flex on him, but Kibas ego will be so damaged so he refuses

Anyway, his house is literally what a 12 year old boys house would look like. Like there’s clutter everywhere the only clear path is the one to his bed

Also whenever he uses the vaulting pole thing he pisses himself like he thinks it’s so fucking funny

I’m sorry but Kibas character will look like a rat like it will look so ugly

I feel like he has like one braincell when he plays this game

Shino Aburame

He’s so secretive about it at first, like this is Shino Aburame, he’s supposed to be this cool mysterious guy

So he will not let anyone know about it, until kiba accidentally finds out

Like they’re on a mission and they’re in their tent sleeping. Once Shino thinks everyone’s asleep he whips out the Switch and starts playing. Then Kiba rolls over to face him and is like “I KNEW IT”

Then Kiba tells everyone else

They’re Animal Crossing rivals now

He’s got a Southern Hemisphere island and he strategically picks his island in a way that he’ll (in real life terms) be able to have access to bugs... but it’s a game, no point in explaining it to him tbh

Like he only strategizes on the game for bugs. Probably talks to himself whenever bugs are involved in it

He doesn’t read the captions out loud, he’ll read them in his head like normal person

Names his Island after a bug species or “Bug Landia”, “Bikochu Island” <- as tribute to those filler episodes lmfao

Starts talking like K.K. (The dog w the stupid ducking guitar) and tbh it fits his personality pretty well, minus some of the hippie energy, but still.. sometimes Hinata and Kiba look at eachother like: is he good?

Will talk like K.K. When fighting enemies and sometimes they’ll stop and be like “did you just quote fucking K.K?” Sometimes it pisses enemies off even more

Also hates Tom Nook, Kiba and him will put their rivalry aside sometimes just so they could gang up on him

Like they’ll just yell insults at him through the screen and think they rlly did something amazing

His fav activity is obviously bug catching!! He gets so hyped when he catches a bug.

If he’s playing the game outside and you can’t rlly see his face bc of his outfit, it will look like he’s spazzing, but in reality he’s bursting with joy bc he caught an uncommon bug

Likes the cranky villagers.. idk why he just gets a kick out of them

His little house thing is bug and tropical themed, he lowkey should be an interior designer

Shinos character will resemble a bug. Don’t know how, but it will.

Choji Akamichi

Loves animal crossing almost as much as he loves food, it’s a close second

He will talk about Animal crossing with anyone, like he thinks everyone is dying to know about his island

One day Sai made eye contact with him for like 2 seconds Chojis dragging him over to his Switch like “oh hey Sai! I seen you looking at me and I figured you must be wondering what I was doing. So I’ll save you the time and just show you instead.” Sais just there like: wtf?

He’s neutral on the capitalist pig that is Tom Nook, Infact, he thinks he’s kind of nice. Poor Choji, so naive.

His island is in the Northern Hemisphere and he doesn’t really strategize it too much bc he doesn’t take the game as seriously as the rest of them like they’re really out here with survival tactics? My G..

Like he doesn’t take it as seriously as Neji and Lee, but he still is doing better than all of them in the game

Anyways, he’ll name the island after his favourite chip brand / chip flavour

Lives for interacting with the other islanders!! Loves Lily and Pashmina bc they’re so nice.

The sisterly and peppy villagers are his favourite

Favourite thing to do is collect fruits and get cool foods. Aside from that, I would go with bug catching as a close second.

Hosts everyone who plays animal crossing for the coolest funking hangouts poor Neji has to sit there and pretend he doesn’t play

Like he is so creative about it to and he’ll think up games like playing musical chairs or hide and seek that they can all play together

Probably results in Lee and Kiba getting into a fist fight irl and accusing eachother of cheating

His house has butterfly themed stuff in there as well as cool food things

Tenten is the only one who doesn’t get pissed tf off when she sees how fly his island is, like she’s jealous, but she isn’t like Kiba and Lee

Chojis character will look so adorable like idc his is the cutest one out of everyone’s

Neji Hyuuga

He first sees TenTen and Lee playing it and he acts like he doesn’t like it, but there are fireworks going off inside his head, like the game looks so fire

So he buys it secretly and he is obsessed, he will deny he plays it if anyone asks though

He wants his islands name to be something thought out, like it takes him 5 days just to name his island.. Only for him to settle on some shit like “Leaf Island” he wanted to name it Byakugan Land but his pride wouldn’t let him

Definitely respects Tom Nook. Like Rock Lee and him both treat the game like a survival tactic so he respects Tom Nook as a superior, even if he has some greed problems. He’s still a superior and he must be adressed with respect >:0

Will get worked up when he overhears Shino and Kiba trash talking Nook and it takes every bone in his body not to knock them out, but he doesn’t want them to know he plays so he refrains

I’m not gonna lie he tries to use his Byakugan when he’s fishing in animal crossing so he can see what type of fish it is through the water and it pisses him the fuck off when it doesn’t work

Like he’s just playing Animal Crossing at like 3 am and you hear him whisper shout “Byakugan!” And then he punches the air bc it doesn’t work

He changes his passport title to “Nook Inc’s Island Dweller”

Nejis favourite thing to do on animal crossing is probably fishing tbh. Like yes it does aggravate the absolute fuck out of him sometimes when he keeps catching the same worthless fish over and over again, but he enjoys the rush of it

His house is all white, like only white furniture idk why

No group interactions, only w Hinata who he made swear she wouldn’t tell anyone he plays

Def critiques her Island and in her head she’s like :0 bruh I’m ur only Animal Crossing friend and youre gonna critique my fucking island nah bitch not w your ghetto ass all white stinky looking cottage

I love Neji I’m sorry but this shit is too funny for me

Neji wants his character to look as much like him as possible, but can’t find the right hairstyle

His drip is fire tho like his outfit is so nice even if it’s all white as well

Rock Lee

Kiba and Shino might be rivals, but they both equally despise Rock Lee on Animal Crossing

Treats it like real life.

For example: since him and TenTen are friends he’s like “me and Tentens islands are Allies”

Has declared war on Kiba and Shino so many times and they’re like?? Dude you can’t even start a war like wtf

He is so competitive though LMFAOO AND HE MAKES HIS CHARACTER WORK OUT. Like he makes him run laps every morning and it doesn’t even benefit him in the game at all... anyways

His island is in the northern hemisphere for sure and it’s named “Power of Youth” or something involving the word Youth

Uses his Nook phone to take pics will all the islanders he stumbles upon

“Good evening, Lily! Let’s take a picture together, the sun is shining in a way that perfectly accentuates your features!”

He also talks to islanders out loud and reads their captions in designated voices for them, it annoys the shit out of Neji

Jazzes the shit out of his Passport like his title is “horizon bound patron” and his little passport comment is “THE POWER OF YOUTH!”

Takes the Nook miles quests so seriously. “I will complete three quests today.” Thinks of them as missions and so he gives them the same energy

Probably calls Nook “Nook-Sensei”

“right away Nook-Sensei” or “you can count on me Nook-sensei!” Whenever Nook asks him something

Rock Lees fav activity is literally just completing whatever a character asks him to do. Like constantly does quests and enjoys it. Wtf

If there is workout furniture on animal crossing, best believe it’s in Rock Lees house

He gets so pissy when Kiba won’t let him on his Island

Invites everyone to his island and forces them onto a tour of it.

Also his character looks so fucking similar to himself that it’s eerie

Kiba will make fun of him for it (Shino will probably join in too)

[kingneptunesthinninghead]

How much do you weigh? what a weirdly personal question

If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? sitting in the shade reading a book

Do you think you can love someone without trusting them? yes but not in a way that will ever be truly fulfilling

What’s your opinion on people who go hunting for sport? i live in a very rural area so i grew up with hunting for sport extremely normalized but once i actually developed and used my critical thinking skills i realized how morally reprehensible it is. literally just begging these people to use their brains.

Do you have a fairly fast or slow internet connection? eh its pretty fast

Have you ever been someplace tropical? florida lmao

Are you sensitive to caffeine? somewhat. i dont really consume it that much

How do you usually get around? driving myself

Have you ever been accused of being too clingy? no bc i’m generally pretty independent unless i reallyyyy like someone

What do you think about Kim Kardashian? neutral

Can you speak any French? je parle un peu français

Favorite yogurt flavor? i’m lactose intolerant so i recently tried dairy free yogurt and i hated it sooo i guess none

How much money do you have in your wallet right now? i dont have any cash in my wallet rn lol

What bottled water brand do you like? deer park or aquafina

Your favorite way to eat chocolate? brownies

How often do you listen to country music? sometimes.

Linkin Park or Avenged Sevenfold? neither

Last surgery you had? my wisdom teeth surgery

Have you ever played guitar? no but i wish i could

Is there someone in your life whose career/life choices you find immoral/unethical? Have you ever told that person your views? Do you find it difficult to support them (emotionally or otherwise) because of their choices? um i dont think so

What trait do you feel you lack that you wish you possessed? a little more confidence

Have you ever considered writing your memoirs? maybe

Do you find it difficult to stay invested in online relationships? i dont have very many online friends anymore but when i had a bunch i loved talking to them

Are you the type of person who pays close attention to the release dates of movies, music, etc., and will, for example, go see a movie or buy an album on the date it is released? If so, when is the last time you did so? only for something i really like.

Do you have any stickers on your laptop? a bunch

Would you rather have a job for which you had to go in early in the morning or one you had to stay late into the evening at? early in the morning so then i have the rest of the day to myself when i get off

Do you use any apps to track your health or medications? i have a workout app but that’s it.

Whose opinions/recommendations do you value most? my mom, sister, and my 2 best friends

If you could’ve been at any historical event, which would you have liked to witness firsthand? probably the women’s suffrage movement or the civil rights movement

Is there something that you really want to do but are afraid of doing? If so, why are you afraid of doing it?i want to tell him how i feel but i’m afraid i’ll ruin the friendship

What is something society “expects” you to do that you don’t want to do and/or don’t plan on doing? wear a tampon i’m sorry but i can’t do it

Have Jehovah's Witnesses ever come to your door? no

Are you well-known by people in your area? eh somewhat

Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? no and i dont want to

What's your favourite type of bird? owls!!

What tv show(s) have you been watching currently? i’m watching loki, hsmtmts, planning to watch s2 of never have i ever, and i started one piece but i haven’t watched in a while

Have you ever dated a smoker? no but that might change😳

Do you share a middle name with any of your siblings? no

Have you ever been a member in a band? No.

Can you cry on command? If so, have you ever used it to your advantage? No.

Do you have separate emails for personal and business? i have my school email and personal email

Have you ever missed a flight? no

Have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? i think so.

Have you ever taken a ride in a convertible? i literally rode in my best friend’s convertible last night lmao

Why did you last need to use a band-aid? i dont remember

What fruit do you eat most often? bananas and clementines

Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? maybe my great uncle?

Has someone ever tried to start an argument with you over Facebook? What happened? no but i’ve been in a few on insta and twitter.

Have you ever had an unusual type of milk (eg. oat, rice, almond)? i don’t straight up drink milk but i love things made with almond milk.

If you could experience life as a Disney princess for a week, which princess would you pick and why? elsa i want ice powers

When you’re at home, do you spend most of your time in your room? sometimes but normally during the day i’m in the living room with my family

If you like to sleep in late, have your parents ever told you off for doing so? No.

Do you find piercings attractive? Yep.

Do you like potato chips? Loooove 'em.

What’s the most stalker-like/creepy thing you’ve ever done? If you don’t think you’ve done anything like that, what’s the most stalker-like thing someone’s done to you? i’ve looked up a few people’s houses on zillow in my day.

Do you think it’s a double standard that a woman can hit a man and expect to get away with it, but if a man hits a woman it’s assault? absolutely, you shouldn’t hit anyone

What’s your favorite old Disney movie and favorite new Disney movie? my top 3 are princess and the frog, tangled, and frozen 2. i also love the little mermaid

Name something “trendy” or popular that you dislike. idrk

“Dirty talk” in the bedroom…love it, like it, don’t care, dislike it, or hate it? it depends on what it is. it should also be mixed with some loving or praise talk imo

What is/are your favorite type(s) of ethnic food, and what’s your favorite food within that type? i LOVE italian food specifically fettuccine alfredo and i also love asian food such as general tso’s, sweet and sour chicken, lo mein, shrimp fried rice, LUMPIA 🤤

How would you describe your relationship with your hair over the years? i’ve always liked my hair color and thickness. i always go back and forth between growing it out long and cutting it short bc i can never choose which i like more also it has lots of red undertones so i’m thinking about dyeing it a deep red

How do you feel about your SO daily/regularly checking up on a couple of his exes on social media? hypothetically it would be a red flag to me. a clear sign they haven’t moved on from the past

Do you prefer your guy to wear cologne or not? a good smelling cologne on a man will quite literally make me bust a nut.

Ladies, how important is it to you that your SO wears/would wear a wedding ring? i’d want them to unless it didnt fit or something

What was the turning point that led you to decide for or against having children? i’m very close with my family so i’ve always loved the idea of having one of my own with my future spouse

Is having your “dream” wedding really that important to have? i definitely have ideas for my wedding and i would want it to go a certain way according to our plan but in the end if things go wrong or plans change it wouldn’t matter as long as i’m marrying the loml.

Do you consider it cheating if your SO goes to a strip club and then doesn’t tell you? i wouldn’t consider it cheating if he was just watching but i would be angry that he hid it from me

How old is too old for trick-or-treating? i dont think it matters unless ur posing a danger to little children

Do you sleep with your arms over or under the covers? depends but mostly under

Do you own any t-shirts of your favorite band? i have nsync and harry styles shirts but thats it

Fries or onion rings? Fries.

True/False: you’ve had an odd dream this week. all the time but most of the time i forget them right after i wake up

Do you find tattoo sleeves attractive? depends

Do you like carving pumpkins? Yeah.

What’s an animal you want to have as a pet but can’t? i think raccoons are adorable but its kindaaaa hard to domesticate them

Have your parents ever caught you drinking? no bc my parents let me drink in the house and i’ve told them abt every time i’ve drank at college

How would you react if your celebrity crush came to your door? i would absolutely piss and shit on myself.

Has your mom/dad ever walked in on you kissing or anything more with someone? no

The person you have a crush on is drunk and goes to kiss you, you know they don’t realize what they’re doing, but do you kiss anyways? i would stop it even if i want to bc i don’t want them to regret anything and i wouldn’t want them to kiss me if they don’t like me bc it would hurt too much.

What would you prefer to get from a guy/girl: flowers, a hand written poem, a picture he drew of you or a nice night out? i would love them all but something abt a guy taking the time to write a poem for me makes me melt

Do you any shirts with any kind of images of food on them? no.

Which holiday is the most fun to decorate for? halloween

What was the first website you had an email account on? gmail

Have you ever written a fanfic? YES AHSHDH.

Tattoos or piercings? tats for sure.

What’s the last gross movie/show/video you saw? the scene where alexei breaks the inmate’s wrist in black widow is SO GROSS i cringe every time

Would you rather live in a huuuge house or a little cozy one? definitely a little cozy one

Do you have a tutor for anything? No.

Who’s the best kisser you know? i’ve only kissed one person.

Has anyone ever threatened you with a knife? No. I'd like it to stay that way.

(If you’re a girl) Has anyone ever called you "shortie" instead of girl? no and i hope they dont

Do you have a deep voice? not really

Do you play games with boys/girls, like 'hard to get’? no thats dumb

Is there a Sonic where you live? yes i’m a whore for sonic

What do you like on your pizza? pepperoni or sausage

[abri-chan]

great blog btw, weird question but I think your the best to answer it maybe, what is the deal with Gio's age,he is 15 during Vento but a lot of girls I know who are Jojo fans(mostly manga based ones if that makes a difference) are absolutely horny for him and get angry when I bring up him being 15 during Vento or say well in current day he would be legal now so it doesnt matter or he is drawn older looking, but they are still kinda lusting after him at 15, what are you thoughts on this?

If I remember correctly Giorno does look younger in the way, and everyone is kinda twinkier in it than in the anime, but by the end of the manga he looks a lot like Dio in part 6. Especially that panel where he’s holding the arrow after defeating Diavolo I think?

I think this is not an easy ask to answer, because there are several things to consider.

The important thing is that it’s okay to you feel uncomfortable with them lusting after Giorno. You don’t need an excuse to be uncomfortable and if you feel something is not right, it’s okay to express your dislike or disagreement. I know there has been a lot of pushback against antis but I want to reiterate that being uncomfortable with certain things doesn’t make you an anti. The word is unfortunate because you can be against age-up content (and although I am fine with aged-up, I respect your right to be uncomfortable), but that doesn’t make you an anti in the fandom sense. In the fandom sense of the word, an anti is someone that not only dislikes certain content or wishes the content didn’t exist, but they actively go and harass real people over fictional content. The second part is the critical ingredient to make an anti. As long as you don’t harass others over what they like or dislike, it’s your right to speak against certain content or avoid it.

I understand your discomfort, because I cannot say that fiction never affects reality. I know antis love to use this argument, and the problem is they’re not even wrong. The issue is that they take the relationship between the two to be very simple, when in fact there are academic books and papers dedicated to exploring the relationship. Some things can have a direct and easily measurable correlation: for example diverse fiction representation affects marginalized groups positively. Also the way women are portrayed in the media has a direct effect on how men can view women IRL. But it gets complicated because we have to consider who controls the mainstream narrative: for example pornhub will have more effect on normalizing incest than jonadio fanfiction. Then you also have to consider the purpose of a piece of work or media. For example, I believe writers should be allowed to explore certain topics for the sake of exploring, just as artists can do with colors. So are dead-dove topics used by a writer to explore, cope, instant gratification, shock, pushback? How much power does this writer truly have with regards to their position ins society?

Then there are times where fiction doesn’t really translate into reality: for example, are horror writers out there murdering people? Is thinking of a murder the same as murdering someone irl, is murdering someone in the fiction the same as murder irl? We can get violent and inhibited in videogames bc we know there are not real consequences; but wouldn’t IRL because we know you can’t just hurt someone and reset the game. So while fiction affects reality, and reality affect fictions, it’s not always easy to measure how, and it’s not always linear. Also why banning all taboos or trying to police what people like is doomed to fail bc it takes a very simplistic view on human imagination or psychology.

Returning to Giorno being 15 in the series, the aged-up argument is the easiest one to defend IMO, and one I don’t get why people have problems with. We have aged-up examples of characters in JoJo: Jonathan, Jotaro, and so on. If someone can imagine adult Giorno (and I’ve seen some amazing art of Don Giovanna), they are not lusting after a child... Despite what his canon age is, you can’t argue they’re pedophiles bc they are clearly into an art piece that depicts him as adult. Why would someone think of adult Giorno when seeing teen Giorno? Idk why is Araki concerned with making a handsome man out of teen Jotaro (his words, he’s actually very particular about his characters being attractive)? We have to measure the mangaka and the fans by the same ruler, else we are hypocrites. Sometimes imagination takes you there... but once you see adult Giorno, it’s adult Giorno.

Another thing is that in the anime, and later parts of the manga, the characters do act and look older than their canon age. If no one told me what the ages where in Vento, I’d think the teens were young adults, and the adults were late 20s, early 30s. So while Araki slapped an age onto them; as a viewer it’s hard to detach your experience of seeing characters that look and act like adults from some number that seems to have no grounding in the world. I read somewhere that age in manga is used a lot for marketing: if it’s published in shonen jump and it will be mostly teens reading, you slap a teen age on the characters. But maybe as adults, mangakas have a hard time to imagine actual teens (it’s hard to actually write good children characters, and I suppose it’s hard to write teens too). So they end up with adults, but have to somewhat label the characters as teens to get teenagers to read the story. Let’s take someone that we can all agree looks adult, Risotto. Imagine someone told you that’s a 14 year old boy. You have this abstract information of age, but your eyes tell you that is the face and body of a grown man. So what will be easier to process for your brain?

Sure IRL if you knew Giorno was 15 but he looked adult, you clearly don’t get involved. But since this is fiction, it is possible to detach the concept of Giorno acting and looking like an adult from his actual age, because there are no consequences. The age is very abstract in this case... and I feel that’s why some of these fans are doing. They see someone that acts and looks adult, and it’s silly to claim they are 15, because it doesn’t add up. The reverse is when mainstream anime draws lolis and calls them 100 years old adults... you feel uncomfortable bc even though you are given an age, the visceral aspect it’s that of a child...

Now if these fans really lusted for someone that looks 15, that’s another question. And it’s not the same as people writing underage content... bc we have to consider how it fits within the narrative (anyone remember Game of Thrones?).

[cs-discourse]

Reccomendations (V long sorry 😅)

I offer you all some shows to watch instead of hAzBiN hOtEL:                         

Epithet Erased (On YT I think. - Animation style is a little hard to get used to, but I love the chars and story line. Wholesome fun.)

Brooklyn 99 ( Netflix - please remember that real cops are not like this, it is a fictitious portrayal - the actors themselves donated 100,000 $ to support protesters against cops. Enjoy it but watch it as the fiction it is. Be aware that it’s copaganda.)

She-ra ( Netflix- we stan that lgbtq representation)

Avatar the Last Airbender (Netflix - Most of you have prbly already seen it but uh. If you haven’t, it’s pretty good. Definitely a lighthearted semi childish show.)

Daria (Crave - We stan unique poc representation. https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/59kp45/daria-jodie-landon-suburban-black-girl) 

Adventure Time (Dailymotion -free- or Google Play - Just google best episodes and watch those ones. The ones with Marceline + PB are my personal faves.) 

Magic For Humans (Netflix - Basically an interesting magic show. Fun activity: when I watch this w/ other ppl we try to figure out how he did the tricks.) 

The Fresh Prince (Netflix - A classic. Still know the theme song by heart.) 

Hilda or Kipo and the Wonderbeasts (Netflix - these two animated shows are new unique takes on fantasy adventures. ) 

IZombie ( Netflix - Basically a zombie detective, but better. Think Veronica Mars. -also a good detective show y'all should watch. *trigger warning: it’s a zombie murder show so it has some semi-realistic depictions of gore/brains.) 

Disenchantment ( Netflix -The closest thing to Hazbin on this list. An animated show with dark humour without being racist or homophobic. *some animated gore that some people might find triggering. It’s been a while since I watched so idk exactly what.) 

Final Space ( Netflix -like disenchantment, an animated show with an intended audience older than your average animation show. *again, animated gore.) 

Mods, if any of these shows are homophobic/racist/otherwise problematic -(ignoring B99 which is obvious copganda. Again: It’s fiction. Do not -I repeat, DO NOT- look at it as a real representation of cops. It’s not.)- please say so. We not here tryna recommend problematic shows. Or, if you have any other reccomendations?

ps: I’m Canadian, so some of these shows may not be on american Netflix, or some of the ones that aren’t may be on it. Idk. Stay safe y'all. Oof way too long submission finally over. 

-

if you like anime, here are things i watch:

blue exorcist - DEMONSSS (hulu and netflix im p sure)

scissor seven - its actually chinese animated, but its very well made and the production value goes up as the show goes on. i honestly rlly like the cliche anime backstory for the main char bc its also funny as hell (netflix)

saiki k - its like if one punch man was a teen who was also incredibly sarcastic. if you have adhd this shows p good for you too, it goes really fucking fast and you cant look away or youll miss something. its hilarious, go watch. (netflix)

also, some youtubers if youre feelin like that:

dream - minecraft youtuber, child friendly (not in the annoying way. just no cussing)!! hes like 5000 iq and holy shit his minecraft manhunts are insane. holds the mc speedrun world record POG. good coder, my fav youtuber right now.

hellfreezer - reading reddit stories youtuber. his voice is very nice, and videos are faily long. i use him as background noise when doing work.

TRO (the right opinion) - long commentary/rant videos on controversial topics/youtubers, like onision and yandere dev. sexy british voice ;)

mossbag - hollow knight lore and theories. i love hollow knight sm

penguinz0 - streams, commentaries, very short videos. one of the funniest men alive. absoultely incredicble. hes very quick witted and his insults make me scream laugh sometimes

joana ceddia - random life videos. full of personality! i love her honestly shes really chill but also gives off the energy of a thousand suns

pointcrow - gaming youtuber. makes a lot of insane challenge botw videos/zelda vids in general. he streams and then makes the videos.

jarvis johnson - makes videos like drew gooden/danny gonzalas do, but he is also a poc. his bids are entertaining and interesting!! i recommend greatly if you like shorter commentary videos.

.phe

my current faves are:

dorohedoro - anime about humans and wizards coexisting during a war against each other. the wizards hate the humans and curse them to experiment with their magic. all-powerful demons control the magic world behind the scenes. very graphic in regards to gore, some nudity on occasion. anime not finished adapting from manga.

hunter x hunter - anime about hunters who do just that-- go out into the world and hunt for whatever it is they want. examples include justice for their clan killed by genocide, a new family because the old one is a toxic group of assassins who believe you can’t have friends, friends to fill in for an absentee father, and a phd. somewhat graphic in regards to gore, especially so later on in the series. anime not finished adapting from manga.

what we do in the shadows - tv mockumentary series about vampires living in staten island. very funny but also VERY NSFW... lots of sexual references/content, gore and blood.

snowpiercer - tv fantasy series about the apocalypse in which the government fucked up and sent the world into a total deep freeze. 1001 train cars are all the life that remains on earth. VERY NSFW... sexual references/content, gore and blood. there’s also a movie adapted from the comic series by the iconic and incomparable bong joon ho on netflix which is good.

// Mod Peach

[vendettacanons]

Some Fun Facts About Antony

// Because I did a bit of research to develop him a bit more after that IMDB discovery and then kept writing-

It’s not made clear exactly what rank Antony holds in relation to others in the Legion but I have a deduction based off of some research, Caesar based his empire off of Rome. Antony is a reference to Marc Antony- Caesar’s Master of the Horse. Despite the title, according to my research, his actual rank was leader of the Roman Calvary and his rank would have been comparable to or directly below Brutus- you know, Caesar’s military leader.

Carrying that over into Caesar’s Legion, if Caesar is, well, Caesar, then that would make Legate Lanius his equivalent of Brutus (seeing as Lanius is next in line to be crowned and also at the head of seemingly all military operations under Caesar). And since Marc Antony was head of the cavalry and therefore just below Brutus, and Legion Antony is a direct emulation of him, that would mean he’s directly beneath Lanius in rank.

Looking at the Legion’s hierarchy those directly below the Legate are the Praetorians, which I personally put in a class of their own with Caesar since they’re basically his bodyguards. However, as we see with Lucius, they do have their own specialties. Theoretically, this means that Antony could be a Praetorian. The only problem is, Praetorians specialize and fight in hand to hand combat only. And Antony does have a gun and a machete in his inventory (additionally he’s wearing Veteran Legionary armor).

So really, it seems like it boils down to Antony being the same rank as one of Caesar’s Frumentarii. He is not a Frumentarii, but he has equal standing with them on account of being in charge of the cavalry, and he answers only to Lanius, Caesar, and the Praetorians really.

Going off of that, and basing it off of historical references, this means that theoretically, if Lanius was killed as Caesar Antony could become Caesar. Let that sink in.

For someone who works with dogs all day and does hard labor training them, Antony’s remarkably very clean. He bathes fairly often and stays fresh as he can. The tent where he sleeps and works the rest of the day is... less so. It’s not terrible nor is it unbearable (for most people in the Legion at least), but it’s definitely not as well-kept as he is. Thanks, Lupa.

I mentioned previously that Antony does have a machete and gun on him that he can use but in my portrayal, he doesn’t nearly use it as much as he could. Nah, Antony would rather wrestle someone to the ground and choke them out or fist fight someone to the death if he has the chance. Hell, this man will bite you if you get close enough to him.

Antony, much like Lanius, has no love for the Legion, and his opinions of it are overall very mixed but predominantly very negative. He has a begrudging type of respect for Caesar and what he’s built. He also respects the people that follow him so blindly for their loyalty and their dedication. But in all actuality, Antony does not like Caesar, doesn’t truly believe in his cause, and indeed he wouldn’t stay loyal to him if it weren’t for one thing: Lanius. He despises and is terrified of Lanius. Everything he does for the Legion, he does because he’s scared of having Lanius thrown upon him as a punishment. He’s seen first-hand what the Legate is capable of. He’s witnessed and experienced his callous cruelty and it is something that he fears with every fiber of his being.

Which is why when Caesar dies, if Lanius takes over he’s defecting. Caesar is the only reason Lanius has not obliterated him completely, and even now when he thinks Antony’s dogs do a poor job, he’ll have his men throw them into flames live for their failures and make sure word gets back to him out of spite. (And yes, Antony can, has, and will silently cry himself to sleep every time he hears that news bc fuck Lanius, those things are his spirit animals.)

Antony has a weird push-and-pull relationship with fire. Campfires and matches don’t bother him. In fact, he actually finds controlled flames very interesting and mesmerizing to watch and will easily become distracted by light sources in the distance (especially in the dark) because he’s become so sensitive to them. But larger uncontrolled flames terrify him. Wildfires or the kinds of scorched earth-style fires Lanius sets to try and erase things from the earth are just so scary to him. He doesn’t know why.

If Antony does not like something and it’s too close to him, he will bite it or smack at it. And not just regularly open palm smacks either. He curves his fingers so his nails are out and will actually claw at the thing bothering him and break flesh because his nails are surprisingly tough and catch flesh easily.

Antony gets a lot of looks and a lot of whispers about him for being so much more focused on his dogs than his comrades at times. He doesn’t really care what people say to him or about him. Now saying something about his hounds will draw more of a reaction.

If you think Antony spins around three times before laying down, you’re not entirely wrong. He actually checks everything in his tent three times before laying down.

Antony has a very sharp sense of direction. He’s very good at memorizing certain landmarks to indicate where he’s at. He only needs to pass through an area once to commit it to memory.

Likewise he’s also good at remembering names and faces. He has a habit of studying people’s traits and features and has an easy time putting names to their quirks. On more than one occasion, he’s found himself identifying the bodies of his comrades that either no one else can name or no one else can recognize for varying reasons.

Antony’s not the strongest swimmer but he makes up for it by being able to hold his breath longer than most. He can doggy-paddle and dive very well. It’s the coming back to the surface part that he has yet to master. Luckily, he’s learned that if he just holds still the air in his lungs will eventually cause him to float up to the surface.

He’s not great at climbing either. Lacks the balance and grip for it. Plus he get nauseated from being up high. He’s fine so long as he doesn’t look straight down. The problem is, Antony often gives into the temptation to look straight down.

Honestly, Antony is probably best on foot. He might not be as meaty as some of the other Legionaries, but he’s still a tough little bastard and his size gives him a remarkable advantage for being fast and agile. It’s harder to land a hit on him than you think, and even if you do, he tends to shrug it off and keep going. That’s not to mention Antony is hard to sneak up on.

Antony is a very alert person. Don’t let his odd demeanor or tendency to linger alone fool you. Tying into his memory, Antony has a habit of looking over his surroundings often. He counts the number of people around him and makes notes often of where they are. He also takes note of where things are (weapons or vantage points in particular), where sounds are coming from, and what is making them. He’ll notice if someone disappears or something suddenly starts or stops very quickly. The drawback to this is that his focus is immediately broken when he does... well, anything. And it kind of shows in conversation when he is not paying all of his attention. It’ll seem like he’s unfocused or spacing out. Luckily this is rare, as he was raised with some respect.

Whatever Antony doesn’t detect, Lupa and his dogs will.

Antony carries on some of the practices of his tribe in a secret. The Legion may boast that they assimilated him, but he refuses to let Caesar erase the Hangdogs completely. Especially because his old practices are something he clings to for comfort and security, just as much as he does his dogs.

Another cool thing about Antony is his ability to track things. Like seriously, this man could track a stray nightstalker pup across the Mojave. It’s not just because of his hounds either- Antony is great at picking up on tracks and footprints, determining how long they’ve been there, and following them. He can do it for days. He’d make a good Frumentarii for the fact that he can just go for weeks at a time tracking and following something undetected, studying its patterns and habits, and strategizing where the best opportunity to strike will arise. It’s because a part of the Hangdogs tradition was knowing how to hunt for yourself and survive on your own. If you could do that, then your dog would only make you more powerful. (They wanted you to have a symbiotic relationship with your sacred hound, not be completely dependent on it.)

For someone so good at keeping tabs on things and tracking things and being fairly decent in combat, you’d really think Antony is a well-rounded Legion soldier. But you’d be wrong. This man cashed out on luck and is only subpar on intellect. He’s only average intelligence but with how clumsy and ditzy he can be sometimes, it’ll leave you wondering if that’s the truth. And sometimes the things that come out of his mouth or the way he phrases them makes it hard to believe his Charisma is anything above a 2 (in actuality its a 5 but he hardly talks like it so-).

Antony is more emotional than most men of the Legion. He tends to think with his heart rather than his head sometimes (see: predominantly) and speaks out based on how he feels rather than what’s logical without saying it. (Ex: if something seems unfair or makes him angry, he’ll convey that without actually saying that he’s upset and simply try to intervene.) It also drives him to be a bit more interactive with others, especially if they’re distressed. His lack of experience leaves him a bit awkward about it, but he’ll do his best to comfort people and is actually pretty good at it.

Likewise, Antony’s strong emotions and quick-to-judge nature cause him to develop equally strong opinions of people fairly quickly. For example, he quickly began hating Lanius.

Antony has a tendency to throw his weight when he sits or lays down. Just a full body flop.

Antony doesn’t like having his hair touch unless it’s by someone he cares about. In which case, he loves having his hair touched. He loves being touched in general. He’s touch starved and very physically affectionate. He’s also big on giving gifts.

Antony knows how to carve wood and is fairly good at sculpting. He never gets to do it though.

He’s also fairly good at tanning, smithing, and sewing, and prefers to repair his own armor when it gets damaged. (And yes, he has tried making armor for his dogs.)

Antony has several tics that he does. He bounces his leg, taps his foot, curls and uncurls his fingers, cracks his knuckles and his neck a lot, taps his cheek or chin with his fingers, bites his nails, and tends to pace a lot. It’s not just when he’s nervous either. He just happens to do it a lot. Mans has too much energy.

Antony loves food. He knows how to cook a lot of things from his old tribe and cooks for himself mostly. Bring him ingredients and ask him to make you something new and he will love you forever.

Tying into that, Antony always has food and drink on him. Always. Like it is astonishing the ways in which he stores food and how much of it he can carry on him at a given time without anyone even knowing. It’s not like he has a super huge appetite either. Antony easily survives on just one or two meals a day.

Antony does have a regiment he follows in terms of walking his dogs. He wakes up early to go for walks out in the desert, gives them a small breakfast, trains the whole day, breaks for a walk or two, goes for one long walk by the river to drink and then take them out into the desert again, then returns them to the camp. He savors it too. He doesn’t like the feeling of being cooped up for too long. He prefers to be outside more.

Antony has a soft spot for children. So do his dogs.

Antony never took any slaves. He, like many who were brought into the Legion, could not bear the thought of taking any slave knowing that they could be one of his sisters or brothers. 

He might not seem like he ever runs out of energy but he does, and when the batteries are finally empty, Antony crashes. Hard.

For someone so tough and so brutish, Antony sure is good at giving puppy eyes.

Antony has jokes. Lots of them. They’re mostly stupid puns. And pranks if he feels close enough with someone.

[lanamemories2]

clip clops in on horseback wearing a pointy little dunces hat n sipping frm a rly long crazy straw tht says ‘goblin’ w all of the swirls. Hlo. i’m nai n it’s rly nice to meet u all!!! 23 n she/ha pronouns. i’m one of the three admins here (cleo lazuli on the main) n i’m literally So Excited to get started i cld honestly beat my chest like caesar the ape over it. more abt lana under the cut!!! also like this or hmu if u wna plot n her pinterest is here 👺🌚 

『KRISTINE FROSETH ❙ CIS-FEMALE』 ⟿ looks like LANA JAMESON is here for HER JUNIOR year as a DANCE student. SHE is 21 years old & known to be VIVACIOUS, ALLURING, CHILDISH & IMPULSIVE. They’re living in NOLAND, so if you’re there, watch out for them. ⬳ NAI. 23. GMT. SHE/HER.

AESTHETICS: 

scalding your fingers in shower water until they glow like rudolph’s nose, cherry red gym socks tugged high and nothing else, stepping out into a cold breeze in just spaghetti strapped silk, a red lightening stripe painted over your eye like a new take on the scarlet letter, crowning each finger with a miniature raspberry, hugging a knee close to lick a stripe of fruit juice off the bruised cap, doodling penises in condensation instead of sitting still, a water pistol topped with rum and covered in glittery pin-up stickers, believable smiles that feel more like baring teeth, playing where’s waldo with your lipstick in the crowd of a party and finding red on at least six people’s mouths, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘SCRAPPY DOO IS A FILTHY SLUT’, prancing around in your underwear to a vinyl record with the curtains open. 

HISTORY:

lana grew up in a big house in albany, NY. i picture it w dark oak floors n lots of light furniture. albums framed on walls. mayb some rolling stone covers too frm way bk when of the bands her dad’s label signed. kind of like… a rock star palace w no evidence of children at all. i think i described it best in one of lana’s self paras once when i said the garden ws “as big as it was unloved”

lana’s mum victoria (vic) ws a music journalist w a pretty fruitful career ahead of her when she met lana’s dad richard (rich). his record label ws jst starting out, founded on the coattails of his rich best friend’s (jensen peters) investment w his other best friend (who he jst calls knoxville). it rocketed to success when they signed poppy injects, a rock band w an electric stage presence, n victoria ws drawn to the glitz n glamour of a man tht ws at the helm of his aspiring industry. their love ws very impulsive, all or nothing right frm the start, n it ws almost like she ws mre in love w his accomplishments n what he represented than him. jst a leetle bit Fractured in its intentions.

anyway so jameson records repped a few big rock bands bk in the eighties, altho poppy injects r who they’re mostly known fr, namely bc of hw brightly they crashed n burned. they were a big chart success bt the lead singer hd quite an intense struggle w heroin (wsnt rly subtle abt it either while he ws in the public eye as u cn probably imagine frm such an on-the-nose band name) n he ws always in n out of the papers. it eventually brought down his career n it ws a big publicity nightmare

lana pretty much… grew up around figures like this throughout childhood. rly troubled characters who wld kind of… b extremely volatile n destructive abt their troubles. the jameson house was kind of an open one as welcoming clients went n a lot of parties took place there. a lot of the time musicians wld b snorting lines in the kitchen when she wnted to grab a bowl of cereal fr breakfast n it was just. a very strange environment fr a child to grow up in

her parents always kind of jst… didn’t like her much. her older brother caleb ws unplanned bt they sort of welcomed the surprise more bt… quickly realised they weren’t cut out fr parenthood n then when lana came as another surprise 3 yrs later they didn’t even try to hide their resentment abt the situation. her mum ws actually booked in to have an abortion bt cldnt go through with it at the last minute. once when lana asked her why shes so cold towards her she jst turned her head frm her dresser, looked at her, told her abt this n said “idk why i didn’t go”. lana didn’t kno wht to say to tht so she jst left her room n closed the door

(dissociation tw) bc of this growing up lana adopted this weird like…. she didn’t rly kno what it ws bt it ws a delusion of sorts where she thought she ws a ghost. she’d jst sort of… drift around the halls w noone acknowledging her n sometimes she ws jst convinced she wsnt actually there or they cldnt see her n she ws jst haunting the house frm a previous family

the one saving grace tho tht sort of?? gt her thru this n made her feel Seen ws caleb. lana quite genuinely hs always thought the sun shines out of her older brothers ass like she jst thinks. hes the best person in the entire world. wld b rly bewildered if anyone questioned tht. he wld always look out for her in the zoo they called a home n cut the crusts off her sandwiches (he’d cook fr them most of the time bc their parents were too busy/didn’t care to) n sometimes wld even sleep at the bottom of her bed curled up like a guard dog. it ws always lana n caleb n his best friend tommy against the world in tht house (tommy lived next door n was always over bc he had very strict parents including a military father tht he found suffocating)

SO when caleb n tommy announced tht they’d signed up to the army lana ws understandably…….. completely blindsided. she ws rly upset tht they were leaving bt she tried not to b mad at them n made them promise theyd b safe n back as soon as possible. she even asked if they cld somehow take her w them n they were jst like :/ it doesn’t work that way luv x

(death tw, ptsd tw, grief tw, trauma tw, hospitalisation tw, drugs tw) anyway caleb ended up getting discharged under grounds of severe ptsd when he witnessed tommy die in an explosion tht took place in a shock raid. caleb returned home sans tommy bt he was never the same after tht. he’s been in and out of hospital twice nw n he’s currently dipped off the radar after starting to use. lana kind of felt like two of her brothers died out there in a way n jst like tht it wasn’t them vs the world any mre, it was jst her. she doesn’t talk abt this tho. when she feels the urge to cry she usually jst smiles

ANYWAY whew tht rly…. took a dark turn there….. chuckles nervously at hw sad lana’s life is bt it’s fine it’s all fINE!!!!!!! ok. so on a mre lighthearted note the jameson family r pretty well off n bc of her relation to such a big music industry figure she’s hung out w a fair few relatively high rep ppl thru her teens. mostly kids of celebrities n stuff like tht. she amassed kind of an instagram following mainly fr her style (v penny lane-esque in some aspects aka lots of fur cuff trimmed jackets bt then also jst…. a wild combination of everything honestly. pastel faux fur coats, seventies style platforms, flame red cowboy boots, pink fishnet tights n glitter used like highlight Everywhere) n bc she’s undeniably Very Pretty

(trauma tw) after caleb got back he was rly withdrawn n depressed. he shut lana out n was kind of harsh to her a lot of the time, always telling her to leave him alone or pushing her away. it didnt help either tht lana had a rly traumatic experience w some of her dad’s colleagues at the label when she ws 16 n he was away n she cldnt even tell him abt it once he was bk bc of his own traumas. she kind of jst shut it all in n kept it to herself

(hypersexuality tw) this obviously?? made her spiral a lot. she was already a girl tht loved sex (she’d only rly done foreplay before tho) but since her trauma it got…. completely out of hand. it got to a point where she couldnt rly go 2 days without it, probably not even 1. her lowest point has probably been scrolling thru craiglist for anonymous encounters n meeting up w strangers on there fr a quick fuck jst for the thrill even tho it’s insanely dangerous n she cld wind up getting herself killed. it’s v clear at this point tht she has a sex addiction whether she’s ever admitted it or not. it kind of… almost mingled w tht same feeling she used to get when she ws younger of being a ghost?? like she jst. only rly feels Real when she’s being touched

(violence tw) a mre recent point of history is her involvement w danny nielsen (an evil npc of mine who is possibly the antichrist??? pending investigation). he attended radcliffe n lived in a house w a group of guys near campus. it wsn’t a registered frat bt he essentially…ran it like one it ws kind of a weird set-up where he ws the King Of The Roost. essentially he found out tht lana n a guy called zeke slept together n he ended up beating him to near death in front of her bc his pride ws rly bruised since they were meant to be dating (if u can call it tht bc danny’s idea of dating is very Warped). ANYWAY he ws found guilty n sent to jail so it ws like Intense n a gd example of the kinds of disastrous relationships she gets herself into. perks of being a wallflower voice: We Accept The Love We Think We Deserve.

PERSONALITY:

always smells vaguely of wild cherries or strawberry starburst or jst the candy aisle in general. if she ws a vinyl record she’d b this one n she’d only play good vibrations by the beach boys, dancing on my own by robyn, play that funky music by wild cherry, femme fatale by the velvet underground n (i can’t get no) satisfaction by the rolling stones 

growing up lana was always a huge social butterfly. knew everyone n everyone knew her. she ws one of those girls tht ws kind of impossible to ignore or forget. very animated, always made u feel like u were the centre of the universe whenever she spoke to u, always made it feel like u were best friends even if ud only spoken to her once. 

deliberately puts on tht kind of Magnetic Alluring Act tht femme fatales wear in movies w most ppl. kind of…. is always playing A Role of the person tht she wants to b seen as. chameleons to situations. feels like she’s performed as the vivacious n fun loving Lana Jameson fr so long tht she doesn’t rly kno who she is beneath tht bt she isn’t too keen to find out

she’s always been rly spontaneous n adventurous. always doing something weird n wild every weekend. she has ten thousand ridiculously absurd n chaotic stories

uncontrollably flirty. boundlessly confident. cld make a joke out a paper bag n her comedy is sometimes surreal / absurd. she tends to laugh when she feels like crying n has a smile brighter than a ray of texas sunshine. 

always dapples her fingers thru the breeze when she’s driving in a car w the window down. she almost always has some sort of sweet on her, whether it’s sour haribo cherries or strawberry lollipops. 

she adores david bowie n prince n madonna n anyone tht’s a vintage style icon w little care fr what ppl think. 

daisies n poppies r her fav flowers bc daisies r wild n overlooked n poppies r the first thing u look at in a green field. she’s had like 8472493874 ‘relationships’ n none of them hav lasted beyond a month / hav been terrible / hav seen her being treated badly / she’s cheated on them. i dnt think she’s actually ever been w anyone she hasn’t cheated on in some form or another

PLOTS:

exes tht lana’s fucked over hideously. she’d probably cheat a lot and it’d be a whole…mess. 

mayb someone tht flipped the switch and cheated on her? 

a cousin plot cld b fun too. a friend tht lana fel out w bc she slept w their significant other.

a fake dating plot cld b fun honestly 

someone tht’s getting lana into drugs?? she’s kind of impressionable/down for anything so tht’s a likely scenario she’d get into tbh

an unrequited crush!! (either way is cool)

someone tht is just hanging out w her/using her bc she has a lot of instagram followers or they want to b signed to her dad’s label

someone in a band!! she’d probably make like penny lane n b their groupie/sleep w them all fgjkshgkh

umm a good influence too mayb? 

oh and a past summer romance/fling tht cld either have meant a lot or not have meant anything at all. bonus points if both of them hav a diff viewpoint on it. 

honestly?? anything is fine i cld ramble for days. mayb even one of the high profile kids she grew up hangin w idk. world’s our oyster fellas!