#and you’re not considering it as an abstract concept

[itspileofgoodthings]

in my coming to terms with things era

[hildadoll]

Understanding Awareness and Reality Shifting

Awareness, at its core, is simply the state of being—a condition where you observe everything without attaching to thoughts, feelings, or sensations. It is often described as pure consciousness or being; a realm beyond the ego and identity. However, when we consider this concept in the context of reality shifting, especially in relation to the five senses, it becomes more practical rather than an abstract idea.

To put it simply, the awareness you're referring to is the ability to observe both internal (your imagination, thoughts) and external (your current reality) things without judgment. In the understanding of Advaita (non-duality), it means realizing that everything exists within this awareness, and there is no real separation between you and the reality you experience—you're not "in the world"; the world exists in your awareness.

So, what does this mean for shifting?

When it comes to how aware you are in your current reality, it’s because your consciousness is focused on the sensory inputs of your present—your body, environment, time, and space. However, when you shift, you’re redirecting your consciousness from these inputs (your current reality) to another input (the reality you desire). The awareness remains the same, but it’s like tuning a radio to a different frequency. Shifting isn’t about creating or reaching something external—it’s about adjusting what you’re aware of.

Regarding who succeeded using the five senses method, yes, they likely practiced awareness actively, even if they didn’t call it that. By focusing their five senses on the desired reality, they redirected their awareness there, which is why it worked for them.

Now, about focusing on your imagination and not being able to see it manifest, this is a key point. Awareness involves not just "seeing" it in your mind, but fully immersing yourself in that version of reality. It’s not just observing, but your belief system also needs to align with that reality. The combination of being aware of something and believing it to be as real as your current experience brings about change. The reason you might not be able to "see" your imagination as clearly as your current reality could be due to still holding onto some belief in the rigidity and permanence of your current reality.

When shifting, practicing awareness means consciously focusing on your desired reality, feeling it, using your senses to make it tangible, and embodying it as if it is already happening. The more you do this, the more your awareness naturally aligns with that reality.

From this point on, we can develop a deeper understanding of what awareness really is and how it can be applied to shifting. Awareness is not merely a passive state of observation; it is an active process of directing your attention towards the desired reality. In other words, you need to consciously focus and use your five senses to exist within that reality.

The question of why you might not see the reality when you focus on and observe your imagination is likely related to not fully "embracing" that reality. It is not enough to simply imagine a reality; you need to feel as though you are experiencing it, to live within it. The point at which you accept that what you imagine is as real as your current reality is when your awareness aligns with that reality.

Many people, consciously or unconsciously, apply this awareness while shifting. For example, those who shift by focusing on their five senses add a layer of conscious awareness to the process of experiencing a new reality. Those who truly shift do not merely imagine the reality; they accept living within that reality. It is not just about observing a scene but about taking part in that scene.

The Relationship Between Awareness and Belief:

In shifting, awareness is not just about observing; it also involves believing in the reality you observe. For awareness to fully manifest, you need to feel as though you are there both mentally and emotionally. Simply paying attention and observing is not enough; you must believe in and internalize that reality.

This means: If awareness perceives what you observe as temporary or imaginary, it does not change your perception of reality. However, when your awareness accepts that the imagined reality is as real as your current one, then shifting occurs. Thus, awareness is a mixture of consciously directed attention and belief.

When you combine this process with a method, it might become clearer how to use your awareness in the desired reality. For example, by selecting a method and focusing your five senses on that reality, consider it not just as visualization but as a genuine experience you are living. Accept the reality as if it were a moment you are present in, not just a scene you are observing.

Awareness is a mental transition. The more you immerse yourself in the new reality both sensorially and mentally, the more your awareness integrates with that reality.

Let's delve into a deeper analysis of reality and awareness. In our current discussion, we focus on the role of awareness in the shifting process. This is a mental and spiritual journey where we aim to understand concepts of existence and consciousness. However, the most crucial aspect here is to set aside these theories and transform them into an understanding you can truly experience.

What is Awareness and Why is it Important?

Awareness is often something overlooked because it is always with us. Yet, we are lost in what we are aware of—whether it be thoughts, emotions, or even external objects. Take a moment to pause and simply notice that you are aware of everything around you. Your thoughts, body, senses… Yet none of these define you; they are merely what you are aware of. This point is critical: You are the observing entity, not the observed.

This is the same for shifting. Your current reality is simply a scene you are aware of. However, as long as you accept this scene as “real,” you remain attached to it. Transitioning to another scene (shifting) is merely about shifting your awareness to a different reality.

Now a deeper question: How does Awareness Form and How Can It Be Managed?

To be aware of something, there are two fundamental elements:

Attention – The direction of your awareness.

Belief – The acceptance of the reality of that thing.

These two elements are crucial in the shifting process. The reason you are aware of your current reality is that your attention is focused here and you accept it as real. However, when you direct your attention to the desired reality and accept it as real, your awareness shifts to this new reality.

How Can We Practice This Process?

It is essential to move from being a passive observer to an active creator. Consider these two important stages:

1. Directing Attention

By focusing your attention on a specific reality, you can move your awareness into that reality. This is a critical step in shifting. Your mind constantly directs attention to a point, which determines the direction of your awareness. Once you clarify the reality you wish to achieve, you must direct your attention to it. The five senses method comes into play here. Experiencing the sounds, smells, and textures of the reality you imagine—these are ways to focus your attention on that reality.

2. Integrating Belief

Once you direct your attention to that reality, the second step is to accept it as a real experience. People often struggle here because the mind continues to believe that the current reality is more real. However, when you combine attention and belief, your awareness fluidly transitions between the two realities.

Let’s explain this:

You are visualizing a scene you want to create. When you fully observe it, you direct your attention to it. But if your awareness isn’t fully there, you will only see it as a thought. To truly shift, you must believe that the scene is real. Mentally and emotionally accepting this new reality leads to your awareness shifting there.

The Harmony of Awareness and Belief:

Here lies the secret of shifting: the combination of awareness and belief. Awareness is not just about observing but about believing in what you observe with your entire being. The scene is no longer a thought in your imagination; it becomes your reality. This reverses the concept of “seeing is believing.” When you believe, your awareness begins to see that reality.

Returning to your question:

“Why can’t I observe my imagination as I am aware of it?”

The reason might be that when you merely observe the scene, your awareness might still be tied to the current reality. However, when you accept the scene as real, your awareness transitions to this new scene. At that point, “imagination” is no longer a thought but a part of your existence.

Ultimate Question: Awareness or Belief?

Shifting is not just about observation but about combining belief with awareness. The more belief you add to what you observe, the faster your awareness shifts there. Therefore, awareness is not just about watching but also about existing within that reality through belief.

Returning to the question: Is it just being aware or adding belief to what we observe?

The answer is: Both. When you add belief to what you observe, your awareness fully transitions to that reality.

This is the deep secret of shifting: the intertwined dance of awareness and belief.

Philosophical Foundations: Existence, Awareness, and Reality

The Nature of Existence and Awareness:

At its philosophical core, shifting is rooted in the nature of awareness and the essence of existence. Awareness is a fundamental force underlying all experiences. We are constantly aware—whether consciously or unconsciously, it does not matter. Our existence is made possible by being aware. You are aware of the world around you, your thoughts, and your feelings. But here’s the intriguing part: you feel like you are the observer, not the creator of what you observe, as if you are separate from them. Yet, when we delve deeper, we realize there is no distinction between the observer and the observed. This understanding is particularly grounded in nonduality philosophy. You and the world you experience are two aspects of the same awareness. Therefore, shifting can be perceived as moving from one aspect of existence to another. The true realization is that awareness contains every reality, and wherever you direct your awareness, that reality emerges.

The Flexibility of Reality:

Many philosophical teachings suggest that reality is neither rigid nor immutable. Particularly in quantum physics, concepts related to the observer's role reveal how consciousness affects reality. This forms the basis of shifting. Whatever we focus our awareness and attention on becomes our reality. In other words, there is no solid world; there is only a field of experience that flexes based on the focus of awareness and changes when we shift that focus. Thus, shifting is about consciously directing this focus to a different reality.

The Role of Belief Systems:

A common topic in philosophy is how our belief systems shape reality. Plato’s "Allegory of the Cave" is a prime example: people chained in a cave see only shadows on the wall and accept them as reality. However, when they step outside and see the light, they realize that their perception of reality was entirely an illusion. Similarly, we live in our inner caves, constrained by our beliefs. The essence of shifting involves breaking this belief structure to step into a new reality. The core of this practice is for awareness to move beyond beliefs and orient towards a different reality.

Practical Application: How to Implement It?

Understanding the philosophical foundations is the first step; applying this understanding in practice is the next. The practice of shifting is a way to materialize theory into action. This process can be applied step-by-step mentally, emotionally, and consciously.

Managing Awareness:

The first step in shifting practice is to become aware of where your attention is. In daily life, your awareness often automatically stays within your current reality. However, consciously directing your awareness to the desired reality is the first step in shifting.

Calming Awareness with Breathing Exercises: Start with breathing exercises to clear your mind and distance yourself from the hustle and bustle of the current reality. Take deep breaths and bring your mind to the present moment. Focus your awareness on your current bodily sensations, as this strengthens the foundation of your awareness.

Focus Exercise: In the second step, begin visualizing the new reality you desire. Use your five senses to feel what that reality is like. Here, imagination and awareness come together. This practice enhances your ability to manage awareness.

Transforming Belief Systems:

Belief is a critical element of shifting. Your mind may be tightly bound to the current reality because you subconsciously accept it as more "real." At this point, it is essential to form a belief in the new reality.

Recognize Your Inner Resistance: When imagining a new reality, you might notice resistance from beliefs about the current reality. Questions like "Is this possible?" are signs of inner resistance. Once you become aware of this resistance, remind your subconscious: "Reality is flexible and changes according to the direction of my awareness."

Affirmations: Use affirmations aligned with your desired reality. Powerful statements that remind your subconscious that the new reality already exists will help restructure your belief system.

Sensory Experience and Manifestation:

Instead of just visualizing the desired reality in your mind, make it real with your senses. This allows your awareness to fully integrate with that reality.

Experiencing with the Five Senses: Instead of just thinking about the reality you imagine, experience it with all your senses. Consider the feel, smell, sound, and even taste of the things in your imagined reality. Experience the scene in your mind not just as an image but as a complete sensory experience.

Embodiment of Reality: At this step, you should not think of the reality as just imagination. Immerse yourself completely in the scene you’ve created. Feeling as if you are living in that reality and moving, feeling, and acting as if you are there makes your awareness integrate with that reality.

Deepening the Practice:

Connecting with Meditation: Meditation is a powerful tool for managing awareness and consciously directing it to the new reality. Sit quietly, calm your mind, and then consciously direct your awareness to the desired reality.

Using Dream States: You can combine shifting with dream states. Lucid dreaming practice allows you to delve deeply into your subconscious and begin experiencing your desired reality there. This strengthens the connection of your awareness with the new reality.

In summary, the philosophy and practice of shifting are interwoven twofold processes. Philosophically, understanding that awareness is an unlimited and reality-shaping force allows you to materialize this in practice. Managing awareness and integrating belief are the fundamental elements of shifting.

Who Manifests the Manifestation?

Manifestation is often linked to the individual's ego and its desire to produce a particular outcome through the "I" consciousness. However, in deeper spiritual understanding, the ego is seen as an illusion; thus, the idea of manifestation is considered an extension of this illusion. From this perspective, true liberation means there is no individual desire left, and thus no need for manifestation efforts. In other words, there is no "I" behind the manifestation.

At this point, the "natural flow of life" comes into play. A liberated being is in harmony with the rhythm of life without ego. As a result, actions arise without great effort, and this state of harmony may be misunderstood by others as "manifestation." However, this is not a manifestation of desire but a result of pure awareness and alignment with life. Therefore, no one actively manifests; life simply flows, and awareness witnesses this flow.

The "Neti, Neti" Practice

The concept of "Neti, Neti" (Not this, not that) plays a crucial role in spiritual inquiry. As Nisargadatta mentioned, this method is aimed at finding the non-subjective reality behind all perceptions and understandings, beyond both the mind and the senses. Theoretically, "Neti, Neti" involves setting aside all forms of thought, belief, and awareness to reach the remaining pure awareness. Everything is seen as transient, disposable, and ultimately a means to reach the final nature.

This leads us to the question: "Who practices 'Neti, Neti'?" Questioning who is applying this method leads to a state of awareness where the concepts of mind and self dissolve. The mind attempts to go beyond itself, but paradoxically, it is the mind itself that is doing this. Thus, although the mind cannot ultimately transcend its own boundaries, true awareness emerges.

States of Samadhi and Liberation

Samadhi, while a significant experience on the spiritual path, is not the final destination. These states play a crucial role in dissolving the individual's mental constraints but are still tools for achieving self-realization. Samadhi is a state where the person transcends the mind and reaches conscious awareness, surpassing the limits of the ego. However, even this state is transient; true liberation is beyond surpassing all these states. In other words, samadhi is a mirror, but identifying with the mirror is still a trap.

The Paradox of Transcending the Mind

Ultimately, transcending the mind and achieving liberation begins as an effort of the mind, but this effort itself continues until it is understood to be futile. As Nisargadatta said, effort must be made, but this effort will not take you anywhere. The mind believes it is a solution, but ultimately, the mind itself is an illusion. Thus, transcending the mind requires a complete understanding of its structure and nature.

The phrase "the mind is devoid of mind" summarizes this paradox. The mind only produces thoughts and concepts; pure awareness is beyond these. In the end, shifting, manifestation, and awareness—all these are concepts perceived through the mind. True self-awareness is beyond all these, a state of silent and pure existence.

In this context, concepts like shifting or manifestation can be seen as mere "shadows" of ultimate awareness. They are reflections of the mind's operation, but true liberation is about going beyond these reflections.

Understanding the Connection Between Shifting and Non-Dual Awareness

Understanding the connection between shifting and non-dual awareness can help in grasping how conscious experiences and levels of awareness function. Shifting typically involves moving one's conscious existence from one "reality" to another, while non-duality implies returning to a state of pure awareness. Both concepts share a similar foundation from different perspectives: both involve consciousness and question the perception of reality.

Connection Between Shifting and Non-Duality

Conscious Awareness: Non-duality is based on the "awareness of consciousness." Consciousness is not an object of its own awareness; it simply "is." Shifting also relies on changing the level of consciousness to experience existence in another reality. In this sense, the essence of shifting is actually non-dual consciousness, which is always present regardless of which reality is being experienced. The essence of shifting is to move awareness through a particular "state" or "reality," but this awareness is always there.

The Illusion of the Self: Non-dual awareness points to the notion that the self is an illusion and that pure consciousness exists. During shifting, the concept of identity or personality is dissolved to allow pure consciousness to be experienced in a different "place" or "reality." This shows that the self or identity is not fixed; consciousness can shape any experience. While shifting, the realization that the conscious mind is an illusion allows consciousness to step beyond this illusion and enter a new reality.

You Are Already There: The phrase "you are already there" is frequently used in non-dual teachings. This applies to shifting as well. The key to successful shifting is realizing that you already contain what you are seeking. Changing your reality is simply about experiencing different aspects of consciousness. Therefore, shifting means becoming aware that you are "already always there" and expanding consciousness in that direction.

Awakening in Consciousness: The essence of non-dual awareness is maintaining conscious awareness. Shifting requires directing this awareness to another state of consciousness or reality. Practices such as meditation and mindfulness can help sustain this awareness in consciousness and make the shifting experience easier.

Practical Approaches

Focus on Consciousness: Observing conscious awareness is crucial in both shifting and non-dual practices. During meditation or preparation for shifting, observing pure consciousness and questioning "who you are" can lead to a deeper state of awareness during shifting.

Concentration on the "I-ness" Feeling: In non-dual awareness, suggestions like Maharaj's observation of the "I-ness" feeling can also be applied during shifting. Creating awareness around the question "Who am I?" and focusing on this feeling can serve as a bridge for directing consciousness to the desired reality.

Liberation from Concepts: In non-dual teachings, freeing oneself from the concepts created by the mind is important. During shifting, it's necessary to transcend the conceptual framework that shapes the current reality. This means removing the boundaries created in your mind to develop the ability to exist in a new reality.

[greenbubblefactory]

Matchup for @marzshin

Congratulations you have a match with..

Riddle Rosehearts !

★Riddle is a natural leader who thrives on order and discipline, and his ambition to uphold rules and structure aligns with your own strong desire to make a difference in the world and achieve your goals. Your mutual drive to succeed could create a deep understanding between you two. As someone who is driven and career-oriented like you, Riddle would respect your independence and ambition. He admires intelligence and would likely be impressed by your focus on forensic science and chemistry, as well as your general curiosity for the world. Riddle might not fully share your passion for mycology or zoology, but he would appreciate the dedication and thoughtfulness you put into your interests, and he’d enjoy engaging in conversations about your hobbies, learning more about them along the way.

★Riddle’s love for structure and attention to detail would complement your own perfectionistic tendencies. He would understand the frustration you feel when things don’t go exactly as planned and could offer you advice on how to channel that energy productively. His problem-solving mindset would also be useful when you’re feeling distracted or unmotivated, as he’d encourage you to push through those moments and get back on track. If you ever feel overwhelmed by the pressures of your studies or life in general, he’d likely be the one to gently remind you that it's okay to take breaks and focus on balance, ensuring you don’t burn out. His calm and methodical approach to life would help you find the structure you need to navigate your day-to-day challenges.

★Given that you value independence, Riddle would appreciate that you can handle things on your own. He isn’t the type to constantly hover, but you’d notice that he’s always keeping an eye on you, offering support when necessary, especially during tough moments or when you're feeling uncertain about your path. He may not express his care in the most obvious ways, but his thoughtful actions and dedication to your well-being would never go unnoticed. Riddle’s quiet acts of service, like bringing you your favorite snacks or helping you with something you’re working on, would be a subtle yet strong way he shows his affection. He might also leave you small notes or messages of encouragement, affirming your worth and reminding you that you’re capable of achieving anything you set your mind to.

★Your shared intellectual pursuits and love for discussing complex subjects would also make for hours of interesting conversation. Whether you’re delving into topics related to your major, science, or even abstract concepts like astral bodies, Riddle would love engaging with you on a deeper level. He’s the type to be fascinated by new knowledge, so he’d likely ask questions to dig even deeper into the subjects that intrigue you, giving you the chance to explain and expand on your passions. These intellectual exchanges would strengthen your bond, as you both value knowledge and would constantly inspire each other to grow in your respective fields. Riddle might even take a quiet interest in topics like forensics, wanting to learn more about them to keep up with your academic journey.

★Riddle's love languages of acts of service and words of affirmation align closely with yours, which would foster a strong connection. He’d likely show his affection through thoughtful gestures, such as helping you with tasks or taking care of something for you without you having to ask. His dedication to service would not only show his love but also his respect for you and your goals. When you're feeling unsure or having a hard time, his words of affirmation would come through in the form of carefully considered compliments and encouragements. He might not speak often, but when he does, you’d feel his words are meaningful and heartfelt, making you feel reassured and supported. For example, he may remind you how far you’ve come in your studies or how proud he is of your accomplishments, letting you know that your hard work has not gone unnoticed.

★In terms of conflict, Riddle can sometimes be a bit rigid in his approach, given his strict adherence to rules and order. However, he would make the effort to understand you and find a way to make peace. If you ever got into a disagreement or felt like things were out of balance, Riddle would approach the situation with a calm demeanor, trying to make sure you both see eye to eye. While he can be strict with others, he’s also someone who values growth and learning. So, during conflicts, he would likely take the time to reflect on his own actions and ensure that his words or behavior didn’t make things worse. He would likely expect you to do the same, and through this, you’d both learn how to communicate better and maintain a healthy, balanced relationship.

★Riddle's nurturing side would come through when you’re struggling with trust issues or need reassurance. He might not be the most outwardly affectionate or emotional, but when it matters most, he would show up for you, proving that his care for you is unwavering. As someone who values words of affirmation, you’d find comfort in his quiet yet sincere words of encouragement. His presence would be a steady one, always available for you when you need him. Whether it's offering advice, providing a safe space to vent, or helping you work through a tough moment, Riddle would be there for you in a way that makes you feel seen and heard.

★Riddle’s quiet strength, intellectual prowess, and nurturing yet firm nature would create a steady, reliable relationship that allows for both emotional growth and mutual respect. His support would give you the confidence to pursue your ambitions while making sure you don’t lose sight of your own well-being. Together, you would form a team grounded in shared values of ambition, intelligence, and respect for each other’s unique qualities.

English is not my first language so I'm sorry if there are any spelling mistakes!

[howtofightwrite]

So in a lot of RPG-inspired fantasy, you’ll see this idea that squads of adventurers will have their members specialize into combat roles with one person being good at defending against hits hit and one person who attacks a lot and one person who hangs back at range etc. Is this totally made up for RPGs? Or is there a historical basis for small-unit tactics with specialization before the modern era?

No.

Specialized combat roles existed, in full battlefield combat. Groups like line infantry, skirmishers, archers, and artillery all existed. The thing is, those were entire units of troops, not individual roles, and combat doesn't really scale down to individual characters.

The tank/DPS/healer trinity is entirely an RPG construct. This actually makes some sense when you consider that the first RPGs grew out of tabletop wargaming. So, seeing battalion level combat reduced to individual characters isn't quite as weird as it first appears. Since then, games have adapted to better fit those roles.

So, the end result is that, the combat roles you see in modern RPGs came out of an abstraction of an abstraction of battalion level combat, and then it started evolving into even more specialized roles. Beyond that, concepts like taunts and crowd control only really make sense within the power fantasies of those games.

In a modern context, mixed combat units with a few specialists mixed in do make sense, though, again, it's not the tank/DPS/healer structure of games, because that is still completely artificial.

So, if it's so utterly divorced from reality, why does this model survive? Because it does accurately replicate how fantasy stories frequently fit together. You get a reasonably distinct mix of character archetypes who can work together, with each contributing something unique to the effort as a whole. And, while you're not going to find an example of the Tank/DPS/Healer squad out there in the wandering in the world, you don't have to look too hard to find stories with a warrior who's able to bare almost any punishment, a sage who advises and assists, and a hero who has a nasty habit of striking the killing blow, and, really, doing the bulk of the punishment.

Accidentally or intentionally, the trinity nails how stories are often told.

Distinct roles in a tabletop RPG also, arguably, provide more range for a group of players to have roles that appeal to them, without requiring them all to conform to a single character type. Not everyone is going to want to be a hulking brute with anger management issues, just like not everyone is going to want to play a character who's instantly deleted half a second after an enemy spots them. The trinity gives both of those players a way to participate in the same adventure without making either of them useless.

The roles have become even more entrenched in MMOs because it provides a shorthand for players to organize themselves for group content. At that point, roles like Tank/Healer/DPS become very useful shorthand for knowing what a random stranger will bring to the group, and a way to quickly assess what you still need before the group is ready to go.

So, does this have any historical basis? Yes, sort of, but in a literary context, not from martial combat.

-Starke

This blog is supported through Patreon. Patrons get access to new posts three days early, and direct access to us through Discord. If you’re already a Patron, thank you. If you’d like to support us, please consider becoming a Patron.

[cawslew]

ooo, i didn't fully consider that. ikind of overlooked how he was contending robbing dazai earlier and wanted to be rewarded for "doing the right thing" because, to me, his action is still a selfless act, even if it is selfishly motivated, due to the extremity of his situation, which honestly makes him kind of captivating because it's a very?? human?? struggle?? what makes someone worthy to live? is a selfless act tainted if it's motivated by selfish desires? is selflessness something someone is born with or is it something someone works towards. honestly, it helps me kind of distinguish him from kunikida, who dedicates himself to the betterment of other lives, but (to me at least) he agonizes over his schedules because he thinks heavily about what *is* the right course of action. anytime he fails, it's internalized as if kunikida himself took an action that failed to prevent the death of someone in front of him. it's interesting to me that, while atsushi is constantly contending for his life, that i find kunikida the living magnet of death flags. i just stumbled into your blog my happenstance the first time honestly, since i'm kind of new to bsd since i only watched the first three seasons and i am going off vibes alooone, BUT!!! thank you for entertaining my anon rambling and i look forward to what things you may put out in the future. o7

Oh no, I do agree that an act of selflessness is still an act of selflessness even when the motivator is selfishness! I just personally do not like how fandom often glosses over Atsushi's more "ugly" traits (selfishness is a natural and even healthy trait, so it is not technically wrong, yet it is still regarded as an ugly thing by society. Atsushi in no way was wrong for thinking what he thought). The symbolism of Atsushi’s character with Akutagawa is Yin and Yang: in good, there’s bad, and in bad, there’s good. Even Akutagawa, who’s, well, a mafioso and a murderer, is the opposite of what Atsushi is.

So it’s always important to me that both Akutagawa and Atsushi, as a whole, represent the concept of selfishness and selflessness. They’re both, not entirely exclusive. I think of it more as Atsushi’s selflessness actually pushing toward selfishness, whilst Akutagawa started selfless and had to become selfish to survive. (I could actually go in-depth about the canonical implications of this, but I don’t think that actually matters overall, and definitely not really in this conversation haha).

Atsushi’s character overall is a selfish desire and a selfless action. That is the whole struggle of Atsushi overall (and exactly the reason why Atsushi as a character won me over).

“Is a selfless act tainted if it’s motivated by selfish desires?” This. Literally this. It’s so fascinating because it’s exactly the kind of moral ambiguity that makes BSD’s characters so compelling. Atsushi’s kindness always feels so raw and unpolished. It is not rooted in the abstract morality that someone like Kunikida embodies. It comes from survival and necessity, born out of his suffering.

Comparing him to Kunikida is an interesting take, actually. Since you’re totally right about him meticulously planning and agonizing over the right course of action. His failures are internalized heavily, to the point that it’s actually a form of self-punishment. Meanwhile, Atsushi is more instinctual; from the beginning, his choices were driven somewhat by survival, as proving his worth is, to him, the only way he’s allowed to live (totally subconsciously).

Kunikida’s idealism does clash with reality a lot of the time, and it is actually a ticking bomb. This is why the Azure King was supposed to be a foil to Kunikida, to let us see how far ideals can go if you’re not fully realistic about them. And also, the grenade scene... Kunikida’s realism isn’t bad if he has a realistic approach to it. He doesn’t want anyone to die before him, but in his line of work, that’s not always possible.

Also, welcome to the BSD fandom! It’s always fun to see how other people interpret the characters. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Your ramblings are anything but ramblings, honestly. They’re such a joy to read and respond to, I’m always happy to chat about anything BSD-related overall.

[makingspiritualityreal]

Nakshatra Gana - Deva, Rakshasa, Manushya

According to Vedic Astrology, Nakshatras all possess a temperament, that is translated to Divine, Human or Demonic. These names however are clichés, and have a deeper meaning and application.

Deva, besides the direct translation divine, also means "amongst the gods". The true meaning of these Nakshatras is "blessed because of their higher nature, that allows them to dwell among the gods", and as a result, blessings come into physical life.

Manushya doesn't mean just human, but also "part of humankind", emphasizing the collective aspect of these Nakshatras of contributing to human achievement in various fields. Even the other word used for that Gana, "Nara" means "of the people". Yet again, the aspect of belonging and contribution is emphasized.

Rakshasa, although scary sounding, doesn't mean that the person is an incarnated demon. It's translation is more akin to "demon abode" or "infested by demons". This is a soul, that picks up a heavy load of karma in specific areas, that only flourish and progress, after these "demons are expelled" = karma is dealt with. This progress translates to a high level of achievement, mixed with feeling enormous spiritual relief. Rakshasa souls are daredevils, not afraid to undertake such a challenge.

The most complicated aspect of analysing results of Gana in a horoscope, is that people are a mix of all 3 Ganas. Classical Vedics swear by doing most predictions based on the Moon Nakshatra, but when your Dasha periods change, different planets will activate, and a different side of you will come out. You’re gonna find Gana themes mixed in a personality, and planets will indicate the precise colour of that personality, as to the areas of people’s problems.

The popculture examples that I give below are clichés, designed to help you understand each Gana in stark contrast. You will feel the description matching you the strongest, if you are a very clear cut type chart-wise, for example sun, moon and ascendant all in one Gana.

Deva

Are unconditional givers because they don't understand human limitations, and as a result they get cheated, bullied and taken advantage of. Their task in this lifetime, besides using their luck and gifts to create and spread abundance, is to learn how to place boundaries with other Gana types. When they're born, they start off as naïve, not really caring about human concepts, and as a result they're often misfits in social environments. They’re typically born into some form of privilege, even if it's just emotional. They are raised already in a place that was good for them one way or another, gave them some long lasting worthwhile characteristics they will take forward in life. There is an element of comfort in their existence. Their basic impulse is truthfulness, innocence and straightforwardness, because they simply want to pour out and consume higher vibrational energies. As a result, they're interested in higher concepts that help them manufacture these sensations. The most abstract of all, loves discussing theoretical, spiritual concepts even if they're based on science (Neil deGrasse Tyson, theoretical physicist, Bjork, abstract artist). They want to bring heaven on earth and have an easiness in manifesting the physical means to realise their larger vision for the sake of higher vibrational sensations, or creativity. They are protective and carry other people a lot because of their blessings, since they consider that they should share what they have. Over time, they learn that if they don’t channel themselves into their creativity and higher pursuits, they attract a lot of difficult types that they end up “saving” at their own detriment. They are always looking for abstract solutions and more expansion, and are disinterested in the mundane, physical world, looking for a more grandiose purpose. Even if they do pursue physical things, it's for an abstract reason, like feelings or atmosphere.

Rakshasa

They either become perpetrators, if they fail to tame their own transformative power, or they are people that empower themselves through overcoming perpetrators. Fierce, seeking power and dominance, energetically ladder climbing. Example in pop culture - Katy Pery, Vishakha Moon creates inspirational music videos, where she joins the military or becomes jungle queen, after dumping an abusive partner and suffering a lot. The theme of this Gana is self destruction or self empowerment. Unlike Deva, there is no inherent comfort given at birth, but a fight for survival and achievement for one to be able to express oneself and their gifts. That is for a reason, as these types are most prone to being destructive and blind in their pursuits or restless without an outlet. They have a hunger in themselves, that needs challenges and obstacles to overcome, so that they can feel like they're climbing, and as a result they often start at the very bottom in the planet area dominated by Rakshasa energy. Deep down, these people want to prove themselves and feel satisfaction from the process of purification. They are either completely misunderstood by other types and vilified by them, or extremely charismatic and gifted at attracting a following of people, who admire their challenging journey. As much as Manushya types are interested in science of psychology, and Deva may use spiritual concepts to share higher sensational pieces of self expression, Rakshasa people are those who need spirituality the most for the sake of healing. They need to truly understand and apply these concepts in order to be able to survive their journey at all, as their inner demons and traumas go deep, and without self awareness they have no chance of success.

Manushya

Concerned with refining human societal concepts and achievements. Psychology (the scientific practical variety), technology, social rights, women’s rights, activism, feminism, economy. Deep analysis of the human condition and its animal impulses. Interest in humanity for the sake of humanity itself. Down to earth, detail oriented, interested in mundane challenges that bore the other two types. Involvement with institutions, attachment to these institutions, contributing to them. Morality is wavering and relative here, as they are not as fierce as Rakshasa, but they are prone to pettiness, being so absorbed into the human world makes them prone to human flaws. They are not strictly immoral, but more expedient and result oriented. Example - Bharani Moon Demi Moore in "Striptease", her character suffers from money problems, child custody problems, government sourced problems, as she explores themes of objectification and female empowerment. These natives are prone to status and wealth comparison, and as a result are also most prone to being shallow and judgmental on that basis, they simply don't bother to try to look at people from a deeper perspective, because the surface practicality is their area of interest. They learn everything by comparing themselves to the external world. To them, society is their parent and measuring stick.

[liketwoswansinbalance]

Smeared Hearts

Credit to @rosellemoon for this oddly, insanely compelling idea about the fluffy, rainbow Storian. I couldn't help myself, so I took her ideas and ran with them.

Here is the link to the original post.

@heyo-428 @cetastars @harmonyverendez Read this, if you’re still interested in the fluffy pen story!

Note:

I did toy around with the order of Rise’s series of events a little, and included elements of Fall. So, be warned: the continuity is by no means perfect, the tone is intended to be more comedic (and sometimes more modern?) than usual, and I wrote this more for the concept than the plot at first. You could consider it a loose chronological series of vignettes, if that’s easier to understand because it isn’t quite a full story. It cuts from scene to scene. Or, rather, it is a story with a lot of scene breaks. Also, this was kind of an impulse fic, so I didn't start with a plan until a little later, but I did edit.

⸻

When Rafal agreed to be named a School Master of the renowned School for Good and Evil, he hadn't expected to become a pet owner, or something of that ilk.

When he initially saw it... it was fluffy and rainbow. Oh, the indignity of it all, of his life. What had he agreed to?

He groaned. The Storian wouldn’t have been his first choice of godlike pens, but he supposed a magical, fluffy pen was better than no magical pen at all.

The Storian drew a heart on Rafal's hand. It was about the size of a coin.

He grimaced.

Why couldn't the pen have chosen a more tasteful mark? A crown, or an ace of spades perhaps. Even an abstract scribble would have been fine, preferable even.

When the Storian drew his brother's heart, Rhian had laughed at its tickle, and the Storian had taken his response as a sign that it was welcome to snuggle up with Rhian every night, beside him in bed like a beloved pet.

Rafal slept alone.

⸻

Rafal had lost all faith in the Storian.

The irritating pen knocked things from tables. It beat Rafal's dish-breaking record within a week. And, it mussed up his hair, and shed all over his robes, slacks, and jackets. If any comparison could be drawn, it was most like a recalcitrant cat, an everlasting thorn in his side.

He couldn't face his students covered in feathery scraps of rainbow fur! The Nevers would ridicule him.

Invest in a lint brush, he noted to himself. That would settle it.

And shave that pen to boot. Not that he could. The little devil was fast, and would punish him for high treason.

Rhian wouldn't mind, he told himself. But, his brother loved that worthless thing. Of course he would mind. The Storian was practically Rhian's child. Rhian's baby talk drove Rafal up the wall. He was so mawkish and cuddly with it, as if it weren't already a combination dust magnet and feather duster that aggravated allergies.

No way would anyone ever see him petting the thing. It was an object, not even a living object, just unusually sentient. It was a patently false imitation of a real animal.

Rafal’s Stymphs were far superior to the pen, and they obeyed him and his commands as any good pets ought to do. Though, he considered the Stymphs more akin to his faithful soldiers, pledged to serve his eternal cause of Evil than well… pets, or whatever the pen was to Rhian.

⸻

Lately, Rhian was becoming obsessed with the Storian, and it worried Rafal.

At least he wouldn't have to worry about Rhian getting attached, only to catch it belly-up, and be forced to fly to the nearest pet store and cosmetic apothecary to replace it with a magic-surgery-modified duplicate before Rhian saw. Getting the last fish to look identical had been one hell of a sleepless night he’d spent in a race to preserve Rhian’s feelings. He’d stayed up to ensure the new pet was in place, and had to bury the old one at the crack of dawn while Rhian was still asleep.

But, with a pen, that couldn't happen. What could possibly go wrong?

Well, he knew the worst had happened far too many times. Rhian tended to kill things with too much love. It was absolutely sickening. He'd overfed goldfish in the past, almost the Wish Fish too, if Rafal hadn't put an immediate stop to it, and he had overwatered various hydrophilic plants from humid, tropical climates.

Rhian didn't have the best track record when it came to pets. Or self-preservation for that matter. He’d struck up conversations with strangers left and right.

A pen could be good for him. It had no expiration date. It didn't even have a mortal life, so no matter how incompetent Rhian was, he couldn't kill it. No responsibility aside from keeping it entertained, no risk of accidentally killing it, something to distract him from Rafal's own wrongdoings. The pen could prove useful in that regard. Yes, he could live with it, he decided.

Then again, maybe the right question to ask was whether it had feelings. Could he insult the pen? And what would happen if he did? He was sure Rhian would be none too pleased. But what about the Storian itself?

⸻

Rafal eyed the heart on the back of his hand. It was glaringly obvious and far too… sentimental. He had to do something about it. Scrubbing vigorously hadn't worked. He'd only succeeded in scrubbing the skin of his hand red, raw, and dry.

Rhian had haughtily told him he needed moisturizer.

Rafal snapped back that he knew. “Go bother someone else with your fussiness, Rhian!”

In the end, he'd bought black, supple, leather gloves, fitting of his look. They molded to his skin perfectly, and they didn't clash with his typical mode of dress.

Rhian accused him of being needlessly "edgy." Well, there was just no satisfying him, was there?

But, Rhian was a squeamish fussbudget, and his opinion held no weight here. So, Rafal wore the gloves. And soon, the years turned to decades, decades turned into a century, and the Woods kept living.

⸻

Rafal wore his gloves every day without fail—until he needed the additional dexterity that could only be afforded by flesh and bone fingers while drowning in the sea amid Night Crawlers.

He tore off the gloves, and in his haste, flashed the rainbow-inked heart at James, James who began to snicker at the thing like it was the most contemptible mark in the world.

"Thought you were Evil. Eh, Master?" James taunted.

"Shut up. It's-it's Rhian’s,” Rafal lied, stuttering through his embarrassment. No need to explain a fluffy pen of all things to James. He'd only think Rafal a dolt.

The heart was so cloyingly sweet, but it still made him feel vulnerable when it was seen, out in the open.

Astonishingly, James’ previously murderous expression softened and its matching intent evaporated. "Guess you wear your heart on your sleeve then. Like the Good do, or as close to Good as you can get, huh? Wouldn't mind saving me then, wouldja?"

Rafal gave the heart a sidelong glance. “Fine,” he muttered unaffected with marked disdain.

In the end, neither of them made it to the underwater prison of Monrovia, which contained the infamous Saders, but no matter. They were both out alive, albeit drenched.

⸻

Suspended aloft, ever an eye, the pen bore witness to a stalemate between the School Master brothers and the Pirate Captain.

The Pirate Captain loped forward. “So, you've got a pen that draws maudlin hearts?” he drawled.

"Yes,” Rafal said through gritted teeth. The leather of his gloves was cracked and split by this point, and creaked when he held a staunch grip. He’d formed fists, but he held himself back. The man didn't deserve a blow to the jaw, yet.

Off to the side, James winced, and drew a great step back to distance himself from his sorcerer friend.

Ferret-boy lolloped into the fray. “Yer magical pen does what?” he piped up, as if he'd been deaf to the Pirate Captain's question.

Him on the other hand—he had it coming for him. Rafal bristled, clenching and unclenching his fist instinctually. His dispassionate gaze morphed into a glare.

“It be drawing that craven, girlish thing on ya hand? Gotta be stark raving mad fer that to ’appen,” Ferret-boy quipped again.

Rhian stiffened, face heating.

Rafal defended, “It's not stupid, fussy, or effeminate. Even if it is, it's my only tie to Rhian at the moment, and I, for one, would prefer to keep it, along with my immortality, if you'll excuse me, pests.” He nodded at James, and turned to leave.

The Pirate Captain lunged for the pen without warning.

The Storian darted away, answering with a sugary jingle. Then, it coiled like a spring, launched, and jabbed the Pirate Captain viciously in the chest.

"Oof," the bested Pirate Captain breathed, clutching his torso.

A true pity that it hadn’t drawn blood, Rafal carped internally.

Self-satisfied, the pen twirled in the air, and flew back to the brothers. It curled up in Rhian's waiting hands like an overgrown, weaselly, color-dyed rodent, its noodly form like a piece of rope gone limp.

Rhian headed back to the School, safely cradling the pen.

Rafal stayed back on the dock to deal with the pirates, and give James a proper send-off.

⸻

Rhian had never taken an interest in women’s undergarments until now, but he was desperate.

He had already sifted through the Beautification classroom’s storage, and had come up with nothing. So, now, he was knee-deep in Dean Mayberry’s dresser drawers that he’d pulled out entirely, and he found himself rifling through her delicates at an alarming rate.

He soon chanced upon what he was searching for, and fished out a pair of airy, white gloves trimmed in lace that she’d worn to a recent soirée. He pressed his lips together grimly. They would have to do. Hopefully, Rafal would be distracted anyway. His new attire could divert Rafal’s attention.

He reasoned to himself that a smudge meant nothing, and hummed to himself nervously. It couldn’t be covering up duplicity. That would be Evil.

He wasn’t Evil.

He buttoned the gauzy, eggshell white gloves up high with their glossy, pearl buttons. Then, he went on his usual rounds over the School grounds, pretending nothing was wrong.

Rhian should have known his brother would first set his eyes on his hands. His glove-covered hands.

⸻

As Rafal flew overhead, approaching the School's clearing, he roughly tugged on his gloves again. Then, he saw something had gone wrong as he glanced down at Rhian from afar.

Rhian clearly had a new, downy, swan-feather outfit, a cloak of pure, shining spun-gold, and something else. Something new. He was wearing dainty, white gloves.

Rafal caught sight of another, unsubtle change through the tower window. He was horrified to find that Rhian had apparently commissioned a golden cage for the Storian while he was gone.

Seemingly, Rhian now tended to it even more regularly, as if he were sure it would grant him a favor, like a genie or a magical creature of that sort would, once caught and released for a wish in exchange for its freedom.

How childish could his brother get?

The moment Rafal's boots hit the windowsill, he peeled off his leather gloves, and noticed that for once, from just minimal friction, the interference of the glove’s coarse fibers, the seawater and his sweat, his heart had smeared.

His heart looked more scrawled than deftly inked. It was a messy blur of rainbow splotches on his pale skin. It didn’t look right, smeared like a stain, an iridescent oil spill, formless and hazy, like liquified beetle wings and mercury.

It was supposed to be as permanent a mark as one from a branding iron. It was a fixed tattoo! It couldn't just be wiped clean away!

Rafal blinked, rubbing at his eyes, trying to clear his tainted vision.

The smudge stubbornly remained.

Something had gone wrong while he was gone. Something sinister.

Rafal stepped into the tower chamber, legging it over the windowsill. He did not observe the cloaked, vampiric man fleeing the scene, memento mori etched on his skin.

Rafal reasoned these circumstances out to himself slowly: Rhian had probably figured that because Rafal never took off his gloves, except in the dark, at night, to sleep, that he'd never notice anything was amiss. But something was. Something grave enough to compel Rhian to cover it up, to erase his mistake.

Their bond had been besmirched by something. By someone. A stranger Rhian had opened his heart to. But was their bond broken?

The implications sank in. If it was broken, he could now be killed.

Rhian flung open the door, and greeted Rafal with cheer, yet he seemed wary.

Uncharacteristically, Rafal reached out to Rhian for a hug, and used the rare moment of closeness to yank Rhian's glove off.

The seams burst with the amount of force he applied and the pearl buttons popped off, catapulted in all directions, clattering to the floor, bouncing and rolling between the stone tiles into every last crack and crevice.

Rhian gasped and tried to shove his hand into a pocket.

Rafal trapped him by the wrist.

Beheld, as sure as day, was a bloodred V slashed in ink, like a scar of rouge in Rhian’s disfigured, melted, rainbow heart stamped around it.

Rhian's hand turned gelid, clammy, and slick in Rafal’s grip.

Someone had replaced him, Rafal concluded, without a word.

Rhian did not even try to offer excuses. It would be too humiliating to explain how he’d let Vulcan violate him during one of their dinners. He blushed at the candlelit memory.

Rafal dropped Rhian’s wrist. “Woe are we,” he sniped bitterly.

Rhian’s eyes welled with tears, but Rafal wouldn’t look at him.

Rafal couldn’t look at Rhian.

In fact, both brothers had fallen silent as the pen scratched away, swishing back and forth like a pendulum.

Rafal glared at the fluffy pen that shivered and flounced and puffed itself up like a fox's tail in the breeze. From across the room he could sense the pen's swift movements as it whisked through the air.

Wisps of shed fluff floated in the sunlight filtering through the silver curtains in spotlit shafts.

He felt the swoosh of the pen's fluff.

It twitched like it was winking at him, and slunk towards his legs like a cat. The pen twined itself around his legs in greeting. For several rounds, it wound itself around him.

He stood uncomprehendingly until his rage got the best of him. He extricated himself from the pen, and couldn’t bring himself to care about brushing the fluff from his slacks.

Rafal jumped out the window, to fly off, and figure things out for himself. The crisp air stroked his bare hands for once, and the sharp wind ripped away the excess fluff, battering his clothes and rippling cloak.

Now, he had to keep his heart in sight at all times, until he reversed this curse. No matter if anyone thought anything while his heart was exposed. They could all go to Hell for all he cared. He was doing this for Rhian.

And to save his own lost heart as well.

⸻

He flew away at full throttle, landed, and set off at a brisk pace, slamming into a boy with golden curls, grey eyes, and a cherub-like face. The exact sort of fellow Rhian would crush on!

“Who are you? Are you the V?” Rafal demanded.

The boy looked confused, and narrowed his eyes, fuming. “Name's Midas," he gruffed, putting up a front. “Who're you?” He stabbed a finger at Rafal's chest.

“Your worst fears,” threatened Rafal placidly.

Midas’ eyes widened.

Rafal shot back up the silver tower, and hurtled through the window, Midas in tow, grasped in his iron grip over the starchy fabric of the boy’s shirt. Coolly, he tossed aside a squirming Midas, who scudded across the room, aided by his sorcery, and left the boy for a moment, vowing to deal with him later.

He turned to Rhian, who stood agape, next.

⸻

Rafal marched deeper into the stone chamber, snatched Rhian's wrist, and dangled his limp hand in front of their faces. “What's this?” he said quietly, menacingly, pressing down on Rhian’s pulse.

He dragged Rhian up to the Storian, and released him.

Rhian stumbled forward, only managing to stay upright with Rafal’s firm hold on his shoulder.

“WHAT'S THIS?” Rafal shouted at the trembling pen, now thrusting his own outstretched, ink-stained hand at the pen.

The Storian, previously backed up against a bookcase, leapt into its cage, and rattled around. It cowered at the back of the cage, against the golden bars.

“This can't be what I think it is. I love him,” Rafal assured the pen feverishly. He sank to his knees in desperation, casting his gaze up at the pen.

Rhian dropped to the floor with him, and looked pleadingly at his pet.

Long and sinuous, the pen performed a twist in midair with a light jingle, as if considering the chastened School Masters before it, contemplating their tale. It moved with broad brushstrokes, white streaks of erasure, fine, gossamer threads spinning through the air, weaving around the brothers’ forearms.

The hearts vanished off their hands.

Rafal flinched, and shielded Rhian.

Rhian quivered, his heart throbbing against Rafal's own pounding rib cage. He gripped Rafal's upper arms, bracing himself behind his brother for the worst, for his precious pet to turn on him.

Yet the pen forgave.

It hovered over their hands, and drew new hearts, the same as it had done a century before.

⸻

Note:

I'd love to know your reactions and thoughts, or if anyone laughed. What specific parts got a rise out of anyone? Did I manage to shock anyone, with anything? I’d love to know what. Feel free to comment anything and ask any questions if there’s confusion.

I hope everything’s up to par. Did anything (specific or not) feel out of character? I didn’t check the books, and I sort of forgot what Hook’s, the Pirate Captain’s, and Midas’ dialogue sound like. If anyone catches any inaccuracies, feel free to let me know. Also, if there's anything else wrong grammatically, or in terms of clarity, please tell me.

[specialagentartemis]

your angry becky chambers posts crossed my dash and lol the fish scene!!! it reminded me of this post-apocalyptic dog series I read one of my kids for bedtime except the takeaways were completely different.

The pack had a fight with another pack (lead by a Tyrant Dog) and the Tyrant Dog was mortally wounded and the MC pack (who had all been pets pre-apocalypse) were going to just let him bleed out and they were horrified that the one dog who had been born post-apoc went ahead and killed him -- the POV dog was highly conflicted about it ("he was gonna die anyway and killing non-prey is bad but....maybe it was merciful of her to give him a quicker death? but she didn't even hesitate to kill another dog and that's scary to me" but it was so clearly framed by the narrative that mercy killer had made the ethically correct choice.

Later in the series, one of the clues that a dog is a Bad Dog is that she's seen hunting prey without going in for a clean kill, so the prey suffers.

it might be bc I'm sleep deprived rn but this felt very relevant to share

That sounds like a really sad and compelling book! And. Yeah. It really seems to come down to how much thought the author is actually putting into what suffering and killing mean. And I think in A Prayer for the Crown-Shy, Chambers just… wasn’t thinking about it. A fish suffering and dying in the air isn’t really about the fish’s experience, it’s about how the abstract concepts of life and death make the characters feel. Despite the concern given in that scene to the bittersweetness of a life having to end to continue the cycle of life, of watching the fish’s death and mourning the loss of life even as you know that things have to die for other things to live (and the robot character kind of… learning and addressing this for the first time?), it’s very abstract. The fish isn’t treated as an animal that is suffering, it’s treated as a symbol of the inevitability of the cycle of life. It’s not so much that suffering is treated as intentionally better, it’s more that it’s so abstracted it feels like Chambers kind of forgot that there is an actual animal involved rather than a philosophical symbol. Also that I suspect she just doesn’t know what is involved in fishing and was not curious enough to find out.

Actually considering the animals (or people) in question to be animals (or people) who are experiencing the world right now goes a long way. Actually recognizing what it is you’re writing also goes a long way :’)

[toyybox]

Spiderwebs #40: Parasite

Masterlist

content: lab whump, organs, starvation

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

However disastrous his attempt to leave may have been, it didn’t change a lot between them. Heather was upstairs all the time, so he was left to his own devices. They eventually returned to a sort of peace.

That morning, Jackie was curled up on the sofa, reading and gazing out the window at regular intervals. He had not spoken to Heather for about a week now, so he was startled when she burst into the living room.

She seemed to be preoccupied, with her hair in a rough ponytail, her white lab coat somewhat disheveled, absent-mindedly holding a pen in one hand. “Jackie, I’ve figured it out.”

He relaxed a bit, once he realized she just wanted to talk. “Yeah?”

“Yes, I’ve got it.” She hovered by the doorway, leaning one hand against the frame and clicking the pen with the other. “I think it’s a type of chemosynthesis. Wait, I’m sorry, I’m rushing—“ She held up a hand to pause him. “There’s parasites—actually, they’re probably symbiotes, but that’s not relevant. Microscopic ones. Inside you.”

“There is?” He frowned. “Can we get them out?”

“No, Jackie, you don’t understand. I’ve figured out why you’re immortal. The—the organism, it’s adapted for a specific purpose, and—“ She made a few grand gestures, trying to explain whatever abstract concept this was. “It’s… stem cells, you know?”

He did not, in fact, know. He shook his head. 

“It’s—never mind, I’ll explain it later.” She ran a hand over her hair, which only messed it up further. “I need you to come upstairs with me. To the laboratory.”

“You have a laboratory?”

“Yes, it’s upstairs.” She was already turning heel and making her way out. “Hurry up, this is absolutely crucial for my studies.”

“Okay, okay, give me a moment.” He set the book down and hurried after her, since she’d already reached the hallway by that point. He did wonder what she was doing up there. It must have been important, considering how impatient she was acting.

He followed her up the stairs. The second floor was similar to the first, with a hallway leading to three different doors, plus a hatch in the roof above a folded ladder. He had only been here once, and he was blindfolded then. Heather stepped into the farthest door.

Jackie had been expecting something more theatrical, neon acids and smoke wisps and heavy-duty machinery, but it was a clinical place. Mostly clean slates of white, flat tables and counters. Very sanitized. She kept it tidy. It smelled overwhelmingly of chemicals, the same chemicals she cleaned her surgical tools with, which he recognized instantly. There were a few microscopes and sets of glassware, and other instruments he couldn’t name or recognize. Behind another door was a smaller area, what might have once been a walk-in closet or perfume room. There stood a deep freezer, buzzing and humming in the background, and shelves of storage, even more tools and containers all neatly lined up.

“Nice place,” he told her.

“Thank you.” She turned to him, holding a scalpel. “Don’t worry, I just need your skin.”

Ah. His… skin. “All of it?”

She shook her head with a slight, amused smile, before returning to neutral professionality. “A very small amount. I’m studying your cells, you see. I wanted a fresh sample.”

He did not trust her around scalpels, but it was better to just get it over with. He held his arm out. “Go ahead.”

She nodded once, then slid the blade across the side of his arm, where the skin wasn’t so close to the bone. It was a quick and precise motion, like ripping a sticker off. He winced and bit back a hiss of pain. She then placed the cut of skin onto a small, transparent plastic rectangle. It must have been satisfactory, because she nodded in its direction and set it down on a table.

Jackie watched blood well up in the wound, shallow though it was. Heather reached over and pressed a cotton band-aid over it.

“Thanks.” He lowered his arm. “Was that all you needed me for?”

“Yes, but you’re welcome to stay, if you’d like.” She moved a few things around, set a few things up—he wasn’t sure what exactly she was doing, as she had her back turned to him. “As long as you’re quiet. I prefer working in silence.”

He entertained her offer for a few minutes but quickly grew bored. Whatever she was working on, he didn’t understand any of it. He didn’t even know where he would start asking questions—maybe why do I have a parasite in me, for starters. But he was sure that she would explain it all in good time, once she finished her examinations. 

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Then they were back to their normal routine, back to the experiments, though Jackie thought these ones were much more pleasant than the drugs and the cassette tapes. They mostly did not involve him. He spent his days like that, reading or lounging by the window, sleeping on the couch or in the basement, killing time. He was allowed to wander around and do as he pleased, though he did visit Heather from time to time.

The organism, as it turned out, was what allowed him to heal so quickly. It had something to do with stem cells, although she couldn’t give him a straight answer. The important discovery, so she said, was that the organism could only exist inside his body. There was some special thing in his tissues that it needed to live. That was why it was keeping him alive. But she couldn't say what that special thing was, not for certain. Not yet, anyway.

“I don’t think you’ll age,” she told him once.

“Really? At all?”

She gave a noncommittal shrug. “I suppose you might age until thirty or thirty-five, but you won’t grow old. Aging is a form of tissue decay. If your cells can regenerate, they should be able to repair that damage. But I guess I wouldn’t know. We’ll see.”

Alive, even when it was inconvenient for him. Parasite was the right word. It was not symbiosis. 

“That’s cool,” he said.

“Yes, it’s all very fascinating.” She continued musing over a few microscope slides.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

She explained how the organism’s eggs hatched within seconds, the way it could multiply like a hutch of rabbits given a few minutes. The mature specimens could be killed with prolonged pressure or radiation, but the eggs were much more difficult to get rid of. Unless they left his body, at which point they would promptly die. She explained the marvelous regeneration of his stem cells, their undifferentiated, pluripotent, embryonic nature. She spoke of how it was nearly impossible to separate them from his tissues to prevent healing, how a lone cell could divide itself until they repopulated. He was even present for a few of her more exciting experiments.

“Wait behind me,” she said.

She had allowed him to follow her outside, where she had set up a Roman candle. She lit the base of a punk-stick with a lighter then tipped it forwards.

The Roman candle smoldered for a few seconds. She stepped back at a safe distance, meanwhile, putting her arm against his chest so he would do the same.

The explosive set off, amid a patch of ground cleared from snow. His heart—removed from his body, of course, and placed beside the explosive—was decimated to a few chunks of char. Bright sparks popped in the sky above them. And then, slowly but surely, the marred lump reformed, cracking and blooming into another heart. The flesh was rather discolored and misshapen. It wasn’t a pretty thing, but it was there.

“It would heal better in your body,” she explained. “The other tissues could provide healthier cells. It’s the same thing with low levels of radiation—it’s replaced your natural immune system, by the way.”

“Oh?”

“That’s why you never get sick. Even if something gets damaged, its destroyed and replaced. That does leave the possibility of autoimmune diseases and allergies, but you were lucky in that regard.”

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Unfortunately, not all her research involved organs safely separated from Jackie. He enjoyed his break from being a subject, but there were some things hearts and skin samples couldn’t test. 

They were in the kitchen, about a week later. Or, Jackie was in the kitchen, and Heather had just entered. She was hovering near him with a conflicted expression, which wasn’t making it easy to enjoy his breakfast.

“Do you need something?” he finally asked her.

“Yes.” She hesitated. “I need you to not eat anything for three days.”

He glanced at the open pantry. “Starting now?”

“That would be ideal.”

He pushed the pantry door closed with a disappointed expression. “Whatever you say, doc.”

It was a great contribution to science, she told him. It could help a lot of people, she told him. It could be incredibly valuable! Really, what was three days when compared to this piece of eternal knowledge? They could learn how he managed to survive without food—they could discover how he accomplished the impossible! It was a small sacrifice in the grand scheme of things. Still, whatever she told him couldn’t change the fact that he had to starve for seventy-two hours. He had done it before, and he could do it again, but he wouldn’t enjoy it. 

During this period, he mostly lay in his bed in the basement, trying not to think of the kitchen with all its glorious treasures, every piece of food just out of reach. He considered stealing, but ultimately decided against it. Mainly because all the food was locked away. A padlock on the fridge, and one on each pantry door. Where Heather got all those locks from, he had no clue. But he would have given in if he could. The first hours of hunger were always the worst.

By the end he was rewarded with a bowl of pasta, and Heather with her answers: the organism produced energy for him when his body starved. It could create the necessary substances under certain circumstances, using certain chemical reactions, although it was only enough to keep him alive. Hence, the headaches and the fatigue. Jackie barely listened to any of this, however. The food preoccupied all his attention.

In the end, Heather might have thought these things were crucial discoveries, the crux of scientific knowledge, but he couldn’t care less. His worries had narrowed mostly down to base needs—food, water, shelter, a safe place to sleep. It concerned him a little, that he had reverted to such an undignified state of mind. Only animals thought of survival. People thought of living beyond that, to understand their nature, to have awareness and choice. But he wasn't in a position to want something more.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Taglist:

@theelvishcowgirl @lthrboy @whumpy-wyrms

@yassifiedinformation @creppersfunpalooza

@vidawhump

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/736934958092959744/ive-actually-been-genuinely-wondering-how-greek

Yeah, sorry, but this is one of those situations where people really need to consider where these “cultural appropriation” discussions started before (heh) appropriating these terms to talk about stuff like Ancient Greece.

Cultural appropriation came out of discussions of cultural imperialism, and particularly the way that empires would deny non Western and indigenous peoples their own cultures while stealing those cultures to profit off of themselves. That’s what appropriation is. But while they were taking those original cultures they were also imposing Western cultural values, including teaching people to value its history and its literary, artistic, mythological etc. canons, which included the ancient Greek pantheon and their associated stories.

Which is to say… idk, i find it super rich that someone growing up in, say, an Asian or African country, learning about Greek mythology because the history of that colonial education system making it An Important Thing to Learn In Every Culture (because references to it are common knowledge now that people mention and art draws on and so on), and then connects really well with, say, Orpheus and Eurydice, or the Iliad, or Herakles, or whichever and whomever as kids often do when learning about cool ancient mythologies in school… and then as an adult they write a book on it, and then some white American who has some Greek ancestors or whatever, a white person from a country that played and still plays a huge role in spreading that cultural colonialism — that person has the AUDACITY to tell this Asian/African/whatever author that now THEY are the colonizer engaging in cultural appropriation for doing their spin on Orpheus and Eurydice. That this colonized person making the best of their colonial education system is actually the one doing a colonialism now — which is what they’re saying by using these terms even if they don’t realize that. Like do people get the problem with abstracting away the concept of “appropriation” so hard from its colonial roots, means a Greek-American can accuse someone from, say, the Philippines (once colonized by the USA) of “appropriating” religious beliefs that that Greek-Americans’ ancestors haven’t worshipped in nearly two millennia?

And if this sounds like some ridiculous hypothetical it isn’t — I’ve already seen the “invoking classical Greece if you’re not on Greek ethnic origin is appropriation” type crap start popping up on book social media, with even one author invoking her identity as a “Greek person” to claim that it was racist to criticize her bad YA novel styles of “being a Percy Jackson ripoff”

--

[skullhalo]

Hey what if you were hundreds of people and souls at some point and because of some huge massacre you all got stuck inside of sculk after violently passing. And you were there for more time than you were ever alive. Then one day through a botched resurrection ritual you become apart of someone. This body is so easy to spread and survive and *live* in. You consider yourself lucky, and take the opportunity. And you are forced a name, and you are all addressed as one. And your actions are contradictory and confusing and *primal* and the hundreds of you inside of this one identity can’t seem to agree on a singular thing. And you can’t do what’s natural to you, what isn’t wrong to any of you, and you get persecuted for it. And maybe if you were the person whose body you’re overtaking people would finally accept you, if you became them in their place. And you meet a child who gets it, who you’ve oddly become attached to, who you find yourself wanting to protect. You hear and remember whispers of the past, parents are an abstract concept by now, one of you must have liked baking when you were alive. You could find this out again, you realize, staring at the little kid in front of you that’s once again given you valuables after you’ve died. Digging a home with them, where you both can be safe. You can’t leave this body now, not after the combining of souls, not after you’ve started to care about others.

You *have* to stay, this is your second chance at life.

[cebomar09-blog]

The Spirit Of Ideas, The Death of God, and the Crisis of Truth

"In those days there was no king in Israel: every man did that which was right in his own eyes." -Judges 21:25

The same idea can lead one group to justify the enslavement of people based on the color of their skin just as effectively as it can spark an abolitionist movement. Take the grand narrative (universal truth) of Imago Dei—the idea that all of us were made in the image of God. You can use that to say that everyone is equal no matter what. One can also say, “Everyone is made in the image of God and therefore equal, except you people.”

An additional illustration is the social constructionism put forth by Michel Foucault and his peers in 1970s France. This concept posits that ethics, morality, identity, knowledge, and social norms are shaped by historical and cultural contexts rather than being inherent or universal truths. Foucault, Derrida, and Sartre signed a petition supporting the decriminalization of consensual relationships between minors and adults…

If each person’s individual truth is considered The Truth, who are we to deny them? 

Conversely, Derrida’s relativism possesses a certain brilliance, making it quite suitable for career counseling and other areas of counseling. The postmodern constructivist perspective encourages individuals to reflect on the various factors that have shaped their current life circumstances, offering them the possibility of escaping a fixed narrative. This approach fosters insights far more effectively than a generic method, especially in an age when people can no longer depend on predefined identities or linear career paths.

The point I aim to drive home is that ideas, their development, and how we use them matter. Philosophy, theology, and the social sciences aren’t simply a matter of people having abstract discussions for the fun of it. The discourse of ideas shapes humanity, and if you’re reading this, you have a worldview that affects you and everyone around you. 

The Spirit of Ideas

Nietzsche begins Beyond Good and Evil by critiquing philosophers by pointing to their arrogance. They lack the humility, he says, to admit that their ideas come, in large part, by way of their own psychophysiological societal constitution. “...the greater part of the conscious thinking of a philosopher is secretly influenced by his instinct and forced into definite channels.”

Nietzsche seemed to understand that ideas are not formed in isolation; rather, they are like seeds that carry the imprint of the environment in which they were conceived. Just as DNA encodes the blueprint for a living organism, ideas are shaped by the psychological, cultural, and social forces that give birth to them. These forces—what might be called the spirit behind an idea—guide its development and influence the direction it takes in the world.

Additionally, Nietzsche prophetically lamented what would happen when grand narratives collapse, leaving humanity in a state of moral and existential disarray. As the death of God looms over modernity, we see ideologies emerge that seek to fill the void. The rest of this post will showcase examples of important ideas that started as seeds, the soil in which they flourished, and the fruits they produced.

Example 1—From Karl Marx to Soviet Russia and Mao Zedong: Communist Atrocities and the Influence of Postmodern Neo-Marxism in Today’s Discourse 

Karl Marx had an obsession with destruction that was not solely intellectual; it carried a psychological weight. His works often reveal profound disdain for his surroundings, a fixation on chaos, and a compelling urge to witness the downfall of established institutions. This sense of negation is intertwined with his personal life—his estrangement from family, inability to find personal stability, and a disordered lifestyle mirror the decay and turmoil he sought to inflict on society. Considering Nietzsche’s view that philosophers' ideas stem from their personal instincts and experiences, Marx’s preoccupation with destruction, rebellion, and dark imagery becomes particularly telling.

Dr. Paul Kengor, author of The Devil and Karl Marx (2020), notes that Marx was fixated on Faustian themes and Hell, despite his declared atheism. He famously stated, “Thus Heaven I’ve forfeited, I know it full well... My soul, once true to God, is chosen for Hell.” For those unfamiliar, Karl Marx, along with Friedrich Engels, profoundly influenced modern communist ideology, laying the groundwork for many 20th-century communist movements, including those responsible for over 100 million deaths. No other ideology in history has caused such widespread loss of innocent life. Marx also advocated for the dissolution of the nuclear family and encouraged ruthless scrutiny of everything—ABSOLUTELY everything. The Communist Manifesto explicitly calls for a violent overthrow of the current state of affairs, including private property, capital, the family unit (yes, the family unit), and entire societies. He glorified destruction.

I encourage you to look into the terrifyingly strong positive correlation between dark triad (now tetrad) personality traits and left-wing authoritarianism.

What about the origins of this spirit of destruction?

These ideas originated from a deeply unclean man who led a chaotic, financially unstable life, constantly borrowing money and failing to repay his debts. Marx exploited his parents' generosity and was widely disliked, even by his partner, Engels. He refused to bathe, and his squalid living conditions reflected a deeper disorder that manifested in his revolutionary vision. Marx’s life embodied his ideas—marked by disarray, dependency, and self-inflicted misery. Just as he sought to abolish the social order, he rejected personal responsibility and hygiene, living in perpetual financial and physical distress.

He suffered from carbuncles, which were at their worst while he was writing Das Kapital (his magnum opus), a lengthy and painful read (I’ve tried). His carbuncles on his privates were particularly severe during the writing process, sometimes triggering fits of rage. In a letter to Engels (co-author of The Communist Manifesto), he noted a boil between his upper lip and nose, stating, “It's as if the devil has been hurling shit at me.” It is not unreasonable to suggest that Marx’s bodily suffering found expression in his work—his pain, both physical and psychological, sought relief through the destruction of the societal body. His boils, which tormented him as he wrote his magnum opus, can be seen as a metaphor for his ideas themselves: festering, painful, and ultimately destructive.

Karl Marx’s perspective views consciousness as a collective social phenomenon heavily influenced, if not determined, by material, particularly economic, conditions. He argues that societal superstructures, especially economic and religious ones, manipulate the working class (proletariat) to benefit the ruling class (bourgeoisie). He wasn’t entirely mistaken. History indicates that religion can indeed perpetuate oppression, as seen in the papal states' influence over politics, the harshness of the Inquisition, and the collaboration between religious institutions and colonial powers. However, to limit human history solely to class struggle while neglecting the positive aspects of the subjects he criticized oversimplifies the intricate nature of human experience. I think this quote from The Communist Manifesto sums it up: “The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggle.” History, for Marx, is defined by conflicts between classes with opposing interests, and the mode of production in any given society determines its social structures and relationships. That’s it. It’s all about power.

If that sounds familiar in today’s discourse, it should. The dominant view of universities, which has so thickly seeped into every nook and cranny of sociopolitical life, has become an adaptation of this same Marxist framework—only now, class struggle has been refashioned into an endless struggle of identity categories. There are the privileged people and the oppressed people, and they are demarcated primarily by race, gender, and sexual preference. If you are a member of the oppressed class, you are de facto morally superior to your oppressors. Some people go as far as to suggest that being wealthy or white means you must be morally corrupt. And if you happen to be a wealthy straight white male, well…

What I’ve just described is often referred to today as postmodern neo-marxism. It denies the existence of universal truths and grand narratives while paradoxically operating religiously (wink) under its own rigid, unquestionable dogmas. But some ideas seem to eat themselves alive like a snake. This intellectual ouroboros fuels a cycle where every institution, relationship, and belief is viewed through the lens of power dynamics, often leaving little room for nuance, complexity, or alternative interpretations. Ironically, while striving to break down hierarchies and absolute truths, these ideologies establish new, rigid orthodoxies that replicate—yet corrupt—the systems they aim to dismantle. This creates a continuous cycle where skepticism becomes self-destructive, eroding the very foundations it relies on. Consequently, we find ourselves in a culture dominated by deconstruction, which allows scant opportunity for genuine reconstruction.

In the end, Marx’s philosophy of destruction did not arise from an objective analysis of history but from the chaotic, festering spirit of his own life. His call for revolution was not just theoretical—it was deeply personal.

Example 2—John Money, Alfred Kinsey, And The Spirit Of Hate And Deception 

John Money

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Ideas do not emerge ex nihilo. Their existence embodies the essence of those who conceive them—molded by personal experiences, trauma, biases, and disturbing motivations. This was evident in Marxism, and it holds true in the work of John Money. 

Money’s childhood in rural New Zealand was marked by early failures, anxieties, trauma, and personal tragedies. He was thin and delicate, raised in a home of strict religiosity, or what he would later call “tightly sealed, evangelical religious dogma.” He had a terrible relationship with his father. Many decades later, he wrote about his father, describing him as a brutal and heartless man who gave an “abusive interrogation and whipping” to his four-year-old son over a broken window. Money famously indicated that this event contributed to his enduring rejection of “the brutality of manhood.” After his father’s death, he wrote, “My father died without my being able to forget or forgive his unfair cruelty.”

Money was thereafter raised in a strongly feminist atmosphere, shaped by his mother and single aunts, whose critical attitudes towards men had a profound effect on him. “I suffered from the guilt of being male,” he wrote. “I wore the mark of man’s vile sexuality”—referring to penis and testicles. Considering Money’s forthcoming notoriety in adult and infant gender reassignment, his subsequent remark carries a disturbing tone. “I wondered if the world might really be a better place for women if not only farm animals but human males also were gelded at birth.”

Fifteen years after starting at Johns Hopkins University, he became known as the individual who introduced the term "gender identity" to describe a person’s internal sense of being male or female. He was also recognized as the foremost expert on the psychological effects of ambiguous genitalia and garnered international attention for establishing the pioneering Johns Hopkins Gender Identity Clinic (presently known as the Center for Transgender and Gender Expansive Health). 

I’ll provide some direct quotes and tidbits from Money.

"If I were to see the case of a boy aged ten or twelve who's intensely attracted toward a man in his twenties or thirties, and the relationship is totally mutual, and the bonding is genuinely totally mutual, then I would not call it pathological in any way," he told the journal, and added, "It’s very important once a relationship has been established on such positive and affectionate grounds that it should not be broken up precipitously."

In 1987, Money wrote a foreword to a work published in Denmark entitled Boys on Their Contacts with Men: A Study of Sexually Expressed Friendships by Dutch professor Theo Sandfort. The book presented what purported to be verbatim testimonials of boys as young as eleven years old describing the delights of sex with men as old as sixty. "For those born and educated after the year 2000," Money wrote, "we will be their history, and they will be mystified by our self-imposed moralistic ignorance of the principles of sexual development in childhood."

A childhood sexual experience," he explained to Time magazine in April 1980, "such as being the partner of a relative or an older person, need not necessarily affect the child adversely." 

He granted an interview to Paidika, a Dutch journal of pedophilia, which carries ads for the North American Man-Boy Love Association and other pro-pedophile groups.

Under Money’s influence, the Johns Hopkins Medical School curriculum in 1971 featured explicit photographs of people engaged in bestiality, urine-drinking, feces-eating, and various amputation fetishes in order to desensitize medical students to sexual perversions.

During a lecture in Winnipeg, Money screened a stag film of five women and three men having group sex, then followed the screening with a speech in which he informed the assembled professors and first-year medical students that marriage was simply an economic compact in which the “heart follows the wallet”; that incest should not be prosecuted as a criminal offense; and that in cases where stepfathers sleep with their stepdaughters, the mother is often “happy” because she “is glad to have [her husband] off her back.”

[W]hat happens in our culture?" he wrote. "Children's sex explorations are treated like a contagious disease... [D]on't let them see the incontrovertible differences in their genitals, and don't, at all costs, let them rehearse copulation—the one universal human activity that still imperatively demands that the two sexes behave differently and harmoniously!"

In an interview with the pornographic magazine Genesis in April 1977, Money vented his frustration against the prohibition against childhood sexual rehearsal play and a psychologist's right to observe it. “The number of studies of the effects of depriving human infants and juveniles of sexual rehearsal play is exactly and precisely zero,” he said, “because anyone who tried to conduct such a study would risk imprisonment for contributing to the delinquency of minors, or for being obscene. Just imagine the headlines and the fate of a research-grant application requesting funds to watch children playing fucking games!”

Note: Information about Money is sourced from As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised As A Girl (2000) by John Colapinto.

His influence on the fields of gender studies and human sexuality extends far beyond the walls of Johns Hopkins University, where, like a seed planted in fertile soil, his ideas have taken root and flourished, influencing generations of scholars, clinicians, policymakers, and the political landscape of modern discourse. Many of his students and proteges, educated in his theories of psychosexual differentiation, have risen to prominent roles at some of the nation's most esteemed universities, research institutions, and scientific journals. Among his former students are Dr. Anke Ehrhardt, a senior professor at Columbia University; Dr. Richard Green, director of the Gender Identity Clinic in London; Dr. June Reinisch, who led the renowned Kinsey Institute (remember that name) for many years; and Dr. Mark Schwartz, director of the influential Masters and Johnson Clinic.

The spirit of his ideas, born from personal turmoil, radical ideology, and an explicit disdain for men, continues to shape policies, academic curricula, and society's perceptions of gender and sexuality. However, John Money was not an anomaly. He was part of a larger intellectual movement determined to dismantle long-standing notions of sexuality and morality under the pretense of scientific inquiry. To grasp the full extent of this ideological shift, we must also consider another influential figure whose impact parallels Money's—Alfred Kinsey. If Money’s theories sowed the seeds of gender fluidity, Kinsey’s work laid the groundwork for the sexual revolution itself. Like Money, Kinsey's research did not arise ex nihilo; it bore the unmistakable mark of his personal obsessions and biases, which continue to reverberate through academia and public policy today.

Alfred Kinsey 

Alfred Kinsey's work on human sexuality was deeply influenced by his personal history and upbringing. Born in Hoboken, New Jersey, in 1894, Kinsey grew up under the watchful eye of his father, a strict Christian disciplinarian who saw Sundays as sacred and tightly regulated his family's activities. Conversations about sexuality were virtually non-existent in his household, leaving Kinsey grappling with feelings of repression well into adulthood. In fact, by the time he met his future wife in 1920, he had never been on a date or engaged in sexual intercourse—a striking testament to his sheltered upbringing.

Kinsey’s early years were further complicated by a series of health challenges, including rickets, rheumatic fever, and typhoid fever, conditions that left him physically frail. The combination of his father's rigid expectations and his own physical vulnerabilities may have fueled a deep-seated desire to push boundaries and challenge societal norms. His fascination with biology and the natural world provided an escape, offering him a lens through which to explore life beyond the rigid confines of his upbringing. Eventually, this scientific curiosity led him to one of the most controversial and influential fields of study: human sexuality.

Initially trained as an entomologist, Kinsey’s career took an unexpected turn when he founded the Institute for Sex Research at Indiana University in 1947.

Kinsey’s personal experiences with repression, combined with his relentless pursuit of scientific understanding, fueled his advocacy for a more nuanced and inclusive perspective on human sexuality. His work not only ignited academic discourse but also played a pivotal role in reshaping societal attitudes, paving the way for modern discussions about sexual fluidity and orientation. Whether hailed as a visionary or criticized for his methods, Kinsey undeniably left an indelible mark on the study of human sexuality.

The Kinsey Scale and Its Influence

Kinsey's most famous contribution is the Kinsey Scale, introduced in Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948). The scale ranges from 0 (exclusively heterosexual) to 6 (exclusively homosexual), with intermediate numbers reflecting varying degrees of bisexuality. This scale critiques the binary perception of sexual orientation, framing sexuality as a spectrum.

The Kinsey Scale is frequently used by LGBTQ+ advocates to highlight that sexuality isn't limited to fixed categories but exists along a spectrum. It provides a flexible framework for individuals to explore their sexual orientation, and it is often referenced in educational materials and awareness campaigns aimed at promoting acceptance of sexual diversity. Kinsey’s research significantly contributed to the concept of sexual fluidity, challenging the notion of static sexual identities. His work has been vital in LGBTQ+ advocacy, normalizing various orientations and addressing societal taboos. Much of Kinsey’s foundational work has paved the way for marginalized individuals, fostering a sense of welcome and inclusion in society. 

Let’s take a look at how he conducted his research, which was cited positively multiple times during my time at IUPUI from 2020-2024. What you’re about to read is deeply disturbing. 

In Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (which was reprinted in 1998 and is widely available), the Institute published the notorious Table 34, which documents the sexual responses of children from infants through teens. They conducted sexual experiments on hundreds of children by bringing them to what the experimenters called “orgasm”, timing these responses with a stopwatch.

Kinsey proudly asserted, “We have now reported observation on such specifically sexual activities as erection, pelvic thrusts, and several other characteristics of true orgasm in a list of 317 pre-adolescent boys ranging between infants of five months and adolescence in age.” Table 34 in Kinsey’s book includes an 11-month-old baby who had an alleged “orgasm” ten times in one hour; a four-year-old child and a 13-year-old boy experienced 26 such alleged “orgasms” in a 24-hour period.

For more information, visit: https://familywatch.org/fwi/Kinsey_fraud.cfm & https://stopthekinseyinstitute.org/ 

John Money and Alfred Kinsey's work illustrates how humans tend to develop new moral frameworks when traditional ones are lacking. Nietzsche's famous words — “God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Yet his shadow still looms” — effectively captures the contemporary challenge of replacing objective morality with constructs rooted in science and society. As Kinsey explored the complexities of sexuality and Money aimed to redefine gender, society began to forge new sacred values to fill the emptiness left by diminishing traditional values. 

The fundamental ideas promoted by John Money and Alfred Kinsey have had far-reaching societal outcomes. On one hand, their work played a pivotal role in advancing discussions around sexual identity and gender expression. Kinsey's research, in particular, helped to destigmatize non-heteronormative sexual orientations. His findings contributed to a gradual shift in public perception, paving the way for advancements such as the legalization of same-sex marriage and broader LGBTQ+ rights movements. Similarly, Money's introduction of the term "gender identity" laid the groundwork for the recognition of transgender individuals and the development of legal protections and healthcare policies aimed at supporting gender-diverse populations.

However, their work has also led to controversial and unintended consequences. Increasingly, gender-related concerns in individuals are being addressed through medical interventions rather than social or psychological support, resulting in a significant rise in treatments for minors, such as puberty blockers, hormone therapies, and surgeries. Rather than affirming the inherent connection between mind and body and reinforcing the intrinsic value of one's biological identity, these ideas have contributed to the erosion of parental rights—as seen in many cases in Canada—and the destabilization of the nuclear family. This has raised serious concerns about the long-term social and psychological implications of their theories.

While Kinsey and Money influenced important social progress, their legacy remains a complex and polarizing one—challenging society to continually navigate the balance between evolving scientific understandings and the stability of long-standing moral frameworks.

Did the spirit of their ideas require child sacrifice in order to flourish? Was that worth future social progress? I’ll let you decide. 

Final Thoughts

Nietzsche’s haunting question— “What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent?”— rings louder today than ever. The collapse of grand narratives and universal truths has left society in a frantic search for meaning, replacing once-sacred values with new ideological constructs. But what drives these constructs forward? The spirit of an idea, much like a seed, carries the imprint of its origin—its cultural, psychological, and historical context—shaping the trajectory of thought and action in ways both profound and perilous.

Ideas, as we have seen, are never neutral; they are infused with the desires, biases, and struggles of those who conceive them. The spirit behind an idea influences whether it will build or destroy, liberate or oppress. In the absence of universal guiding principles, we find ourselves in a landscape where ideas are constantly deconstructed but seldom reconstructed with wisdom and foresight.

As we strive to redefine morality, identity, and social order, we must ask: Are we creating a coherent framework that fosters human flourishing, or are we trapped in an endless cycle of ideological reinvention? True balance requires both order and chaos—an acknowledgment that while ideas must evolve, they should not detach entirely from the timeless truths that anchor our humanity.

In the end, the spirit of an idea shapes not just the world but the soul and psyche of those who embrace it. The challenge is not merely to invent new values but to discern which spirits we allow to guide us forward, for better or worse.

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits.

Matthew 7:15-16

[tedwardremus]

moodboard

Sirius and his best friend Pepto Bismol

please and thank ya, you know the food in Azkaban isn't good for the digestive system......

or

Sirius and his wedding with the Dementor/tattoo artist

Happy Monday to Sirius and Oberon the Dementor

Sirius Black never saw himself getting married. But then again, he never saw himself spending his entire life in prison, so who was he to predict how his life would turn out? It wasn’t like he’d spent his youth daydreaming about a white picket fence, a doting spouse, or children running around a sunny garden. His life had always been more about surviving the day-to-day chaos of being a Black, dodging family expectations, and eventually fighting in a war that nearly cost him everything. Marriage, in his mind, was something for people who had the luxury of thinking about the future—something Sirius had never allowed himself. Besides, he was never one for the conventions of society, always the rebel, the one who did things his way, for better or worse. But then, life threw him a curveball. After spending almost a decade in Azkaban, isolated and surrounded by the soul-sucking presence of Dementors, his perspective on many things had shifted. You couldn’t spend a decade in a place like that and not come out changed, in ways both obvious and subtle. And Oberon... well, Oberon was a decent enough bloke, as far as Dementors went. Sirius had spent countless hours in his company, and if he were honest, there were moments when the creature seemed more like a familiar presence than an ominous specter of despair. It was a strange thing to think about, and Sirius would never admit it out loud, but in the deep recesses of his mind, he found a twisted sort of comfort in Oberon’s silent companionship. When you’re locked away in a place like Azkaban, you cling to anything that can help you hold on to your sanity, even if that “anything” is a Dementor who seems just a little less eager to drain your happiness away. Maybe it was all in his head—a trick of his mind to cope with the endless monotony and despair. But for Sirius, it was a reality he lived with every day. And in that bizarre, twisted reality, the idea of marriage—of a lifelong commitment—became just another abstract concept, something as distant and unattainable as his former life outside those cold, dark walls. So no, Sirius Black never saw himself getting married. But life had a way of throwing him into situations he never expected, with people—or Dementors—he never thought he'd consider companions, let alone anything more. In the end, who was he to say what his future would hold? If life could lead him down a path that ended in Azkaban, who was to say it couldn't twist in even stranger ways?

Send me a character/pairing and an aesthetic/concept and I’ll make a moodboard based on the ask!

[heartbeatbookclub]

I absolutely adore all of your analysis so far, they are so indepth and it feels like you’re able to explain stuff that I’m only able to vaguely think in an abstract sense when it comes to ddlc and dhdhdj so so good

I do wanna say that for you mc analysis, there’s one thing missing. I’m someone who got into ddlc cause of plus so I have hyperfixated on all the lore. While the employees imply that Monika made MC, I don’t think that’s actually true based on what we know about Monika. If she could make a whole character then why couldn’t she make herself a route? Heck in one of her act 3 convos, she can barely change the music before saying “well I just break everything anyway”.

So I believe based on other emails, that it was Ive Laster who made MC since they were the one who wanted to make ddlc a game. In the first meeting notes, we are told that Ive tends to ramble a lot. But in the next one when MC is mentioned in a meeting, they are silent. Another thing is that in one of the ddlc plus trailers, ive is the name of the MC.

It could be said that Ive based it on the stuff in the control group, but the control group was made AFTER the main vm (That’s not how a science experiment should work but ya know, I don’t think they are smart). So really the control group is based on main game first. Honestly so much of the issue of the plus lore is how it’s so convoluted to get, but reading it all on the wiki helped me alot.

Plus seemed to add a new sense of horror to the og, the horror of knowledge that one plagued Monika is now plaguing the player as we have all this information but can do nothing to help them. I think the idea of MC being made by someone else adds this new layer to him along with this new layer of horror. But that’s more just my own thoughts on it that I thought you may find interesting along with all the lore from above.

Anyway, I hope you have a good day! Your post are great and I’ll make sure to keep up with coil more!

aw, thanks anon! i often find it difficult to find the exact way to explain what i'm thinking when i do analysis like i have on this blog, so i'm glad i can at least help to put it into words for other people who have even more trouble with it than i do.

as for the rest of your statement...i think you make a compelling point. full disclaimer; a lot of my knowledge on what's presented in + outside of the full text of the side stories is secondhand, and when talking about the original game, i think it's important to keep in mind that my reference for most of this is my playthrough with my friends back in like...2017-18ish a little after the game came out...? aheh, i won't lie, though i am rather obsessive in the course of scouring information i remember via the wiki/elsewhere to verify i'm not just making it up, putting off my replay of the og game has not been helpful for me.

i think it's very much up in the air as to how much influence that Monika actually has over the game, which is something i talked about in my analysis of Natsuki in the Side Stories. in my opinion, what + demonstrates more than anything is that in whatever she DID do in the main game, she mostly worked with material that was already there to make things easier on her. one of the things i based that claim on was the reference of the Protagonist in the Side Stories, but it's not a necessary claim, and in fact, i think you do make a good point in how it's unlikely that she'd be able to do this (at the very least, by herself) based on what's been shown of her ability in the game.

i think, in regards to your comment on the reference to MC in the Side Stories, it's important to consider the wider conceit of DDLC--i have a deeper analysis i'm tinkering around with on terms of it as an exploration of fiction vs the concept within the "universe", but that's another story--namely, all of the girls aren't (or at least, are heavily implied not to be) just static fictional characters following a pre-written script, they're genuine artificial intelligence!

this is part of what i meant when i said that the Side Stories demonstrate the raw character of each of the girls independently of any 4th wall shenanigans--within the world of Doki Doki Literature Club, they're essentially just people living in the confines of a computer, and therefore have essential, largely immutable character traits which exist within some fundamental essence of what makes them who they are. i think there are a shitload of really, really terrifying things this opens the door to if you really think about its nature (independently of DDLC, i've personally had longform discussions with a friend about the morality and potential horrors which would exist within a similar universe concept, and it's somewhat ubiquitous in a lot of sci-fi universes), but like i said, that's a different discussion entirely!

what i'm trying to suggest here is that it's likely that Sayori's relationship to the Protagonist is something inherent to her character, so it doesn't necessarily have to be something gleaned entirely from the Side Stories.

of course, this is all post hoc reasoning with what we're given! occam's razor suggests that it's actually just likely that (given that DDLC was written and released a long while prior to the Side Stories) they didn't necessarily plan every part of this from the outset, so some things just naturally seem to fit together a little weirdly, with little details added here and there just for flavor! i think that given the nature of the entire thing (and how Dan Salvato has talked about DDLC and the statements he's given with about in universe details in the past), it's unlikely that every single element of this was planned out from the word go.

this might be a bit of a controversial opinion, but there's a lot about how + handles the lore of ddlc that i didn't really like, just because it adds a whole new layer of lore and context, which soured a lot of my impressions, because the original game really flourished in its simplicity. that said, with all that's been given in the Side Stories and the deeper layers to the actual horror which are now visible in the original game, i think it pretty well makes up for it!

awa, i didn't plan for this to become an entire essay in itself...but i do appreciate this kind of thing! i really like digging deep into what's explicitly provided in canon to get a deeper understanding of the characters and universe as it's actually been shown, so any encouragement and correspondence related to either my analysis or my opinions in general are welcome! honestly, i'm also welcome to read others' analysis like this, because i like to see when people read deep into it like i do! typically it ends up reshaping how i see the entire thing, and it sorta just makes my heart happy to get people thinking about this stuff!

i think, as a last thought, if MC is actually conscious in any way similar to the other girls (which I think is a definite possibility, given his ability to respond in contexts impacted by Monika's manipulation, even if barebones), it actually makes him a very interesting character in his simplicity. i know that Dan Salvato doesn't see him as one, but i think it'd make for an interesting study in a fanfic or something.

i hope you also have a good day anon (even though it's 2 am here as i'm writing this...) and you BETTER KEEP UP W/IT I PUT MY HEART N SOUUL INTO THAT BABY (/lh /hj i'm just glad other people are liking it, even if it's just silent kudos :))

[kiarabiden]

A Comprehensive Guide to Mathematical Geometry Instruments

Mathematical geometry instruments are essential tools for anyone engaged in mathematical, engineering, architectural, or artistic activities. These tools are designed to help create precise and accurate geometric shapes, measure angles, and facilitate various mathematical calculations. Whether you’re a student, teacher, or professional, understanding the purpose and use of these instruments is crucial for success. In this comprehensive guide, we delve into the world of mathematical geometry instruments, exploring their types, uses, and tips for choosing the best tools.

What Are Mathematical Geometry Instruments?

Mathematical geometry instruments are tools specifically designed to perform geometric tasks such as drawing shapes, measuring angles, and dividing spaces proportionally. These instruments are widely used in schools, colleges, and professional settings for a variety of applications. From basic geometry kits for students to advanced instruments for professionals, these tools cater to diverse needs.

Common Types of Mathematical Geometry Instruments

Here are some of the most commonly used mathematical geometry instruments and their purposes:

Compass

A compass is a pivotal tool used to draw circles and arcs with precision. It consists of two legs—one with a pointed tip and the other with a holder for a pencil.

Uses: Drawing circles, measuring distances on maps, and marking equal segments.

Protractor

This semi-circular tool is used to measure angles in degrees. Protractors are available in various sizes and materials, such as plastic or metal.

Uses: Measuring and constructing angles accurately.

Ruler

Rulers, often made of plastic, metal, or wood, are essential for measuring and drawing straight lines.

Uses: Measuring lengths, drawing straight lines, and scaling.

Set Squares

Set squares come in two types: 45-degree and 60/30-degree triangles. They are used in combination with a ruler for constructing angles and straight lines.

Uses: Creating perpendicular or angled lines and ensuring accuracy in designs.

Divider

Dividers resemble compasses but have two pointed legs. They are used to measure distances or transfer measurements.

Uses: Comparing lengths, transferring dimensions, and plotting points.

Curve Ruler or French Curve

A French curve is used for drawing smooth curves and irregular shapes that cannot be drawn with a compass.

Uses: Designing patterns, drawing curved lines, and creating smooth arcs.

T-Square

T-squares are used in technical drawing and drafting to draw horizontal lines and serve as a guide for set squares.

Uses: Drafting technical drawings and ensuring straight and parallel lines.

Importance of Mathematical Geometry Instruments in Education

Mathematical geometry instruments are integral to education, especially in subjects like mathematics, engineering, and physics. Here are a few reasons why these tools are essential:

Precision and Accuracy

These instruments help students achieve accurate results in geometric constructions and measurements.

Visualization of Concepts

Geometry instruments enable students to visualize abstract concepts by constructing shapes and angles.

Skill Development

Using these tools enhances students’ spatial reasoning and problem-solving skills.

Foundation for Advanced Studies

Geometry tools lay the groundwork for advanced subjects like trigonometry, calculus, and engineering.

Tips for Choosing the Right Mathematical Geometry Instruments

Selecting the right mathematical geometry instruments is crucial for ensuring ease of use and accuracy. Here are some factors to consider:

Quality and Durability

Opt for tools made from high-quality materials such as stainless steel or durable plastic. They should withstand regular use without losing accuracy.

Precision

Ensure the instruments are designed for precision. Check for clear markings and accurate measurements.

Ease of Use

Choose ergonomic designs that are easy to handle, especially for young students.

Purpose

Identify your specific needs. For example, a student might need a basic geometry box, while a professional may require advanced drafting tools.

Brand Reputation

Trusted brands often provide better quality and after-sales support.

Budget

While quality is important, consider your budget and choose tools that offer the best value for money.

Maintenance and Care for Geometry Instruments

To ensure the longevity and accuracy of your mathematical geometry instruments, proper maintenance is essential:

Cleaning

Clean your tools regularly with a soft cloth to remove dust and debris.

Storage

Store your instruments in a protective case to prevent damage and ensure all components stay organized.

Handle with Care

Avoid dropping or mishandling the tools, as this can affect their precision.

Check for Wear

Inspect your instruments periodically for signs of wear or damage. Replace worn-out tools promptly.

Innovative Uses of Mathematical Geometry Instruments

While geometry tools are primarily used for academic purposes, they also find applications in:

Art and Design

Artists and designers use these tools to create intricate patterns and designs.

Engineering and Architecture

Professionals rely on precise instruments for drafting technical drawings and blueprints.

Crafts and DIY Projects

Hobbyists use these tools for crafting and DIY projects that require accuracy.

Astronomy and Cartography

Geometry instruments are crucial in mapping celestial bodies and geographical locations.

Advancements in Mathematical Geometry Instruments

With the advent of technology, traditional geometry instruments are evolving. Digital tools such as electronic compasses and software applications now complement physical instruments, offering enhanced precision and flexibility. These advancements cater to modern needs and are particularly beneficial for professionals.

Popular Brands for Mathematical Geometry Instruments

Several brands are known for manufacturing high-quality mathematical geometry instruments. Here are a few:

Staedtler

Faber-Castell

Maped

Helix Oxford

Classmate

Conclusion

Mathematical geometry instruments are indispensable tools for learning, teaching, and professional work. From basic tools like compasses and rulers to advanced drafting instruments, they play a crucial role in ensuring precision and accuracy in various tasks. By understanding the types, uses, and maintenance of these instruments, you can make informed decisions and maximize their potential. Whether you’re a student mastering geometry or a professional creating technical drawings, investing in the right tools is a step toward success.

[troius]

Of Swords and Masks

The Arrancar Arc is something of a mess. It takes 240 chapters, or over four and a half real-world publishing years, to cover what is in-story a couple of weeks (and the majority of that, everything after Orihime is kidnapped, happens over one day). It’s crammed with so many new characters and themes that half of them just wind up getting dropped or forgotten about. And it contains the first instances where, for long stretches, the manga just does not work.

But rather than talk about that, I’m going to talk about what I liked about this arc, which I consider to not just be objectively good as a whole, but also contains by far the most development of Ichigo Kurosaki, our protagonist, to the point that the whole 500-page arc is structured around it.

The first portion of the story, dealing with Ichigo and co.’s return to Karakura town, is nearly flawless in its execution. We reestablish our human characters in their everyday lives, showing how Soul Society changed them and their relationships. We reunite with our supporting cast of Soul Reapers. We establish Ichigo’s struggle to control his inner hollow, which will drive his character development for the rest of the arc. And most importantly, we are introduced to our two new concepts for this arc: the Arrancars and the Visoreds.

Back when Ichigo was first flailing around with his large but boring sword, we’d established that Hollows are spirits who have lost their moral center, and so wear a mask to conceal themselves from the world that they’ve come to despise. Soul Reapers, we learned, were the inverse—their weapon is their identity, their swords literally channeling the essence of themselves into a weapon. Ichigo learned to use this weapon himself, but in the process of doing so, also unlocked that darker part of himself that preferred to operate behind a mask.

We gain power, in a very abstract sense, from developing ourselves. The surer you are of yourself, the more you are able to affect the world in the way that you wish, even to the point of developing and changing your very self. But to use that power, and specifically to use it to harm others, is difficult. Often it’s going to clash with the compassion within us, because most of us haven’t built our identities around hurting other people. It’s very difficult to look somebody in the face, recognize their humanity, and still wish to harm them. So the mask becomes attractive. You want to put on that façade of the ruthless killer, because it makes the doing of violence easier. You’re not looking them in the eye, and perhaps more importantly, they’re not looking you in the eye.

So the Visoreds become Ichigo’s mentors. They help him control his power, and yet in doing so, lead him further along the path of embracing it completely, of losing that moral center. Because Ichigo’s Visored powers are fundamentally incompatible with his moral center, the care and love he has for others.

And that’s where the Arrancars, the namesakes of the arc, come in. Their struggle is the exact inverse of Ichigo’s—they are struggling to reconcile their lack of a moral center, their nature as depraved beings, with the desire to connect with others, to have the sort of meaningful relationships that would eventually make them whole. There’s a certain misery to each of them, they’re all predators at heart, who know nothing other than killing and domination. And yet, in each battle with Ichigo, we see the deep anguish inside, the yearning for meaning in life beyond struggle. And this, of course, has tremendous meaning for our main character: this is what he’s cutting himself off from!

At Ichigo’s emotional nadir, he’s realized this. He can’t bring himself to further alienate himself in the pursuit of power, turning away from the final battle in part because it seems hopeless, but also because he now knows the sacrifices inherent to seeking untrammeled levels of power, and he’s not willing to make them. He wins the final battle not by conquering Aizen, but by making him weak enough that another party can take him down. And in doing so, he sacrifices all of his powers, ensuring that he will not be able to abuse them again.

Ichigo ends the arc, funnily enough, in the place that Uryu started it. He’s found his moral center, found what he will and won’t stand for, at the cost of his powers. But sacrificing his powers was a bit of a cop-out. At some point we all have to decide how we want to affect the world, for better or worse. I don’t doubt that Ichigo’s going to want the power to protect those close to him, just as Uryu did. We’ll see what choices he makes, and how he navigates that tense relationship between using and wielding power, and maintaining equal, loving relationships with the people around him.

The Lost Agent arc begins tomorrow.