#and you were also probably looking for someone to commiserate with so apologies

[brizzlovesyou]

I’m really not a fan of a split season. Bridgerton kind of got away with it cos Nic and Luke were touring together and people were excited to see them and new content everyday, I feel like OBX is just lacking in promo, this tour starts a week before part 2 and I’m just getting impatient. I don’t know what it is but it’s just dampened my excitement, probably because the cast just don’t interact anymore like they used too, people love to see that and with the long break between with hardly any thing to go on it just feels flat…

oh really?? i haven't felt this excited about the show since the lead up to s3. like straight up spinning on my head discussing theories and character development and trying to figure out what the hell the sequence of events might be in part 2.

it's hard with the cast dynamic shifting, i totally get that. i think something in me broke with the s3 press where i just!!!! i got burned so badly that i was dreading this press tour and instead i've actually been watching interviews and not getting second hand. LIKE I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE THE DAY. i don't watch bridgerton so i can't really gauge what they did in their break between releases but i feel like there's been a lot??? or maybe my algorithm is just so heavily skewed.

the fact that they're sending the cast on this "tour", whatever the fuck it ends up being is wild. the fact that they did not only a much larger scale premiere in charleston AND now poguelandia again is wild. i'll be the last person to praise netflix and maybe the bar was just in hell but they kinda seem like they're putting their back into promo??

and then just on a personal note like if i'd gotten the "jj was never meant to be a maybank" reveal and was expected to let the credits roll into the next episode i would've done something drastic. like. i just wouldn't have had the willpower to stop watching and i feel like i need every second of this month inbetween to process that news?! it's also given me the chance to actually watch the episodes slower, differentiate, unpack a first half of the season that was a full fucking feast, especially jiara wise, i have friends who are writing again for the first time in months/years like!!!!! idk if that's the general consensus or not since i tend to stay in my little tumblr bubble but i'm personally fucking loving the two part release. it's woken up the fandom (and tbh the locals i know irl) in a way i was scared to even hope for.

ALSO if you love fanmade works there's a lil something getting cooked up that i hope will ramp that excitement back up!! 🌚

[fairestwriting]

Hey, hello, would it be possible to request the first years with a crush or s/o who's constantly very warm so they can basically act as a human heating pad but despite this they're very touch starved and basically melt into hugs and cuddles, gender neutral pronouns would be great, thank you very much and merry (probably late) Christmas if you do this and same to you even if you don't!

another oldie (Visibly. im so sorry anon. i hope an awesome holiday season) i just had to take...... in the name of all my fellow human space heaters

Ace Trappola

One day, his hands got cold, and you were nearby, neck fully exposed, and Ace did what he would obviously do in this situation. Except it turned out he was the one shocked by how warm you are, even though he did make you jump a bit.

He's a fan of the physical affection. He doesn't fluster easily and likes showing you off all smug, linking your arms together or putting his over your shoulder while you're with your friends. The warmth is a great bonus.

When you cuddle up in a hot day, he whines about how you're gonna cook him alive and will jokingly "attempt" to push you off while giggling, then turning on the AC of his room or dragging you both somewhere cooler.

Deuce Spade

The first time you hug, Deuce gets spooked because he thinks you have a fever. He fusses over you for a few good minutes before you can explain anything. Then gets embarrassed of his reaction.

Being Deuce, he'll randomly revisit this worry, but mostly he just eases into it rather easily. He's a little shy, whether you're in public or not, but you can tell he feels comfortable with the way he leans into you.

Feels so bad if you're holding hands and his gets sweaty. Apologizes a billion times while wiping it clean on his shirt. Nevermind that it'd happen even if you weren't so warm, he just doesn't want you to ever feel awkward when touching him.

Jack Howl

Also really warm because of his wolf beastman genes, also surprisingly touchy. It's hard to tell which one of you is warmer, actually? Which in the end just means you end up comfortably cuddled up very oftwn.

...whenever you're away from others, of course. It's not that Jack hates the thought of PDA, but he "prefers to take it slow" (Read: Makes him blush way too easy)

Commiserates in the summer and celebrates in the winter if you're not very tolerant to heat like him. Sometimes he talks about his family's trips to the north with a voice softer than usual, hinting just a little bit that he'd really love it if you came along one day.

Epel Felmier

He's also on the warmer side temperature wise, but he's small, so he ends up getting cold surprisingly easily.

At first he's a bit spooked with the touchyness, really just because it's his first relationship, but it grows on him. A lot.

Epel thinks him getting cold easy-ish is embarrassing, so he really feels like he won the lottery here. Now he gets to put his arm around your waist to stay warm and look cool with you by his side, boy's on top of the world.

Sebek Zigvolt

Runs very cold. The first time your hand is anywhere on him he jumps a bit. The situation's like the inverse of someone who gets startled by their friend's cold hands pressed to their neck.

He briefly questions if you're really human, stammering something about how only beastmen are so warm. He's too distracted by how nice your warmth feels to make much sense.

He's so easily flustered every time you get cuddly, but if he even tries to push you off (Which he mostly just does if you're in public) it comes out all feeble. Even if he's trying to keep up with etiquette and you two actually have to step away from each other, it's all over his face that he misses the coziness.

if you wanna support my work, you can buy me a ko-fi or commission me!

[penny00dreadful]

And They Were Roommates! - Part 2

Part 1 Part 3 AO3

Eddie had called out of work the next day. Steve could hear him making his apologies to Mrs. Henderson who'd taken over the running of the shop when her husband passed.

Steve knew she'd probably tell him to stay home for the rest of the week, probably longer if she could get away with it, but Eddie loved every second he spent working there. Adored Dustin. Adored the other kids, Steve's kids, who used the back room for their dice game after closing on Thursday evenings.

Eddie would have to be beaten away from the premises with a bat. A bat with nails.

Steve might just have to give it a try if the idiot refused to rest properly.

He wasn't mothering him.

He was like… distant cousining him.

When he heard Eddie retreat back to his room after the call and when a light rumbling of snores came through the wall maybe a half an hour later, Steve finally made his exit from his room.

He hadn’t wanted Eddie to think he needed to put on a brave face or act like he was okay if Steve was out in the public spaces while he made the call. 

Not because he cared.

Just so Eddie wouldn’t have to pretend.

And so he himself didn’t have to deal with the tension.

Yeah, right.

Also, it was the least he could do to complete Eddie's designated chores off the whiteboard that there had been war over. 

Robin and Eddie’s friend Chrissy had been forced to come in and mediate the whiteboard before one of them set the other's hair on fire. Though by the end of the day the two best friends had been too busy making eyes at each other to be of any help.

Steve was taking a risk; messing with the delicate whiteboard balance that stayed the same, week in, week out, lest another war start. But if Eddie wasn’t up for going to work, he certainly wouldn’t be up for sweeping, mopping, countertops and garbage.

And like, Steve could hardly blame him, he’d been through a lot yesterday, he’d been betrayed by the guy he’d cared most about. He was attacked and had his heart broken all in one night.

So it was whatever.

Just a few chores. 

Whatever.

At least he didn’t have to worry about keeping the noise down. Eddie could sleep through the apartment being ripped up by a cyclone then dropped into Oz.

He’d probably sleep through any and all musical numbers to follow, too.

Though he’d be bummed about missing them.

A few hours had passed by that point and Steve was just about to sit his lovely bottom on the couch to enjoy some good old fashioned thoughtless tv when there was a knock at the door.

He half expected Mrs. Henderson to be on the other side with half a hospital in tow behind her as well as, like, fifteen gallons of her famous chicken noodle soup. Which Steve would not turn down for love nor money and would steal a minimum 50% share.

As was his right.

But it wasn’t Claudia.

It was some guy. 

Some guy who had a bandage over his nose, a harsh purple colour blooming underneath, sitting a little off as though broken. Some guy who had cuts and scratch marks all over his face and neck.

Some guy who seemed to be affronted at the very sight of him.

But as he stood there Steve could see the clogged up gears working in his brain before the guy opened his mouth and said "You're Steve, the roommate."

Steve pursed his lips. 

Well, this interaction was off to a great start. 

Though if this was who Steve thought he was, he couldn’t give less of a fuck.

"I'm Steve. Eddie's the roommate.” He said with a raised eyebrow. “What was with the look?"

The guy blinked at him. "What look?"

"The look you gave me, when I opened the door. Like I'd shit on your shoe." He answered with a cocked eyebrow and a cocked hip.

"Oh, uh… I just thought Eddie had shacked up with someone already.” The guy laughed. “Bit soon.” He shrugged and smiled at Steve as though looking for some kind of commiseration for a good joke, two men giving each other nudges about how silly their wives were or whatever other shit straight people did.

But Steve had no commiseration to give.

So this was definitely the shithead, then. Rick.

Steve leaned against the doorframe, practically acting like a barricade, blocking off access to the apartment with his arms crossed. "Don’t like the idea of him having someone at home?” He asked in a light tone. “Bit hypocritical if you ask me.”

Rick’s face immediately soured. "That wasn't his business to tell."

“I think you lose the privilege to that kind of privacy when you fuck around on people you’re supposed to love.” Steve shrugged. “Or just people in general.”

“Who the hell are you to judge me?” Rick puffed his chest out. “You don’t know me.”

“And thank god for that. I don’t need to know you. I know you’re a cheater, that’s enough.”

Rick scoffed. “Whatever, man. I’m not here to debate morality or some shit with you. I’m here to see Eddie.”

“No.” Steve answered as simply as he could. 

The guy seemed to need things to be concise.

Rick looked bewildered. “Ex- excuse me?”

“You got cotton in your ears or something? I said no.”

“Who the fuck do you think you are? His keeper? You know he hates you right?”

Steve pulled his mouth down into a mocking pout. “Oh no.” He sighed, deadpan. “I’m so heartbroken.”

“Listen, I’m not getting into it with you right now, man. So call Eddie out or move.”

“Or what?” Steve leaned forward a little, feeling his blood light on fire. 

There would be nothing more he’d love at this moment than Rick trying to square up to fight. 

The guy was a little taller than him, but Steve was much broader, much stronger and though it wasn’t something he liked to do, he knew he could throw a decent punch if it was for someone else.

That much was obvious. 

Thinking back on the things Eddie had said last night, the things Rick had tried, the way he’d cried into Steve’s shoulder, Steve would break Rick’s nose all over again if given half a chance.

“Steve.”

Eddie appeared next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder and pulling him away from the door.

Rick looked between the two of them before his eyes landed back on Steve, snapping at him “You can fuck off now.”

Steve raised his eyebrows as if to say ‘oh, can I?’, but even so, he looked at Eddie, waiting for some sign of what he wanted, whether he wanted him to stay or go.

But Eddie gave no indication of what he wanted, wedging himself in between the two and pulling the door tighter to himself, his expression thunderous through the blooming bruises and angry cuts.

“The fuck are you doing here?”

Steve took that as his cue to go. Even through all the bluster and posturing and how much the two of them still didn’t like each other-

We barely tolerate each other, Steve insisted to himself, we don’t like each other. I don’t like him.

-he wasn’t going to force himself into this drama and if Eddie needed to tear this guy to shreds on his own, Steve would let him.

But he had barely taken a step back before Eddie’s hand shot out, grasping at what he could until he had a fistful of Steve’s shirt, white knuckling it and stopping him in his tracks.

The movement was hidden by the door, Rick wouldn’t have been able to see it and Eddie didn’t acknowledge that he’d done anything, still staring his ex down.

Steve stopped dead where he was and when Eddie seemed to realise that he wouldn’t be moving, his hand loosened, coming back up to rest against the door.

“I’m here to sort things out between us. Try to fix it.” Rick said, his voice going soft.

Eddie exhaled a derisive laugh through his nose. “Why don’t you go and ‘fix’ your wife?”

Steve crossed his arms, standing guard in the back but still mostly out of sight.

“C’mon babe…” Rick reached out, attempting to grasp at Eddie’s fingers but Eddie snatched his hand back. “I think you’re just… making a big deal out of this when you don’t need to.”

“A big deal?” Eddie snapped, leaning forward. “Not only have you been cheating on your wife but you’ve been cheating on me too.”

“You?” Rick sputtered, incredulous.

He exhaled with an eye roll and only then noticed that Steve was still standing there.

“Are you serious?” Rick almost shrieked. “What the hell are you still here for? Show’s over, normie!” He waved his hand in Steve’s direction as though dismissing him.

Steve raised his eyebrows and smiled back, not moving an inch.

Rick looked back to Eddie. “Are you not going to do anything about him? We’re in the middle-”

“Oh my god.” Steve injected as much sarcasm as he could. “Is this a private conversation? I had no idea.”

Rick’s face was turning red with frustration. “You got a real attitude problem, man.”

Steve turned his mouth down in a pout. “Oh no.”

“That’s it.” Rick slammed against the door all of a sudden, wrenching it from Eddie’s grip and almost blowing it open if it wasn’t for Steve’s hands stopping it in its tracks.

The sudden stop jostled Rick, sending him slightly off balance and Eddie took the opportunity to kick out hard, swinging his leg up until it landed in between Rick’s legs. 

Eddie retracted his foot for just a second as Rick crumpled with a scream of pain before kicking out again, catching him in the hip and shoving him back into the hallway, sending him sprawling.

“Lose my fucking number, asshole.” 

Eddie spat down at Rick before turning back inside and slamming the door behind him.

His eyes were still narrowed and furious as he glared at Steve who could do nothing but stand there.

The sound of Rick’s groans were still echoing beyond the door as the two of them looked at each other.

The silence stretched on as Eddie heaved heavy breaths in and out and Steve stared dumbfounded.

There was a glossy sheen to Eddie’s eyes by the time Steve opened his mouth, not sure of what he was going to say.

But it didn’t matter.

Eddie stormed past him without a backwards glance, his hair just disappearing behind the door before he slammed it closed and the wailing of a guitar and the crashing of drums started to scream out of the speakers in his room.

He didn’t see Eddie for the rest of the day. Didn’t knock on his door to try to pull him out and didn’t try to get him to talk.

Steve was only just waking up the day after when he heard Eddie’s bedroom door open and shuffling coming down the hall towards the phone.

He twiddled his thumbs, waiting in his room while he heard Eddie’s muttered conversation. 

He didn’t want to interrupt, didn’t want to have to force his presence on Eddie before it was necessary but he really had to pee and he’d have to walk past the phone to get to the bathroom.

Thankfully the conversation didn’t last long but then Eddie shuffled away from his own room towards the bathroom and Steve had to take some very deep breaths.

He couldn’t really be mad at him for it, the guy hadn’t come out of his room at all yesterday after the confrontation, he deserved to pee but Steve felt like his kidneys were gonna start failing at any second.

When he heard Eddie shuffle back into his room Steve nearly cracked the wall with how hard he threw the door open, rushing down the hallway and into the bathroom before he exploded.

Eddie hadn’t made another appearance by the time Steve was grabbing his keys for work and as much as it irritated him, he was feeling a little wary about leaving him all alone for most of the day.

Turned out he didn’t really need to worry about it.

Just as he had turned back towards Eddie’s room, there was a knock on the front door.

He swung it open to find bouncing blonde curls and a bright perky smile.

“Hi Steve.”

“Oh, hey Chrissy.” He stepped aside, allowing her to sweep inside. Her sweater was very unusual. Dark blue and baggy and tucked into her light wash jeans. Steve could have sworn he’d seen it before. There was a large plastic bag in her hand that a glance inside told him was filled with every tooth rottingly sweet thing she could have scooped off the shelves at their local store.

She placed the bag on the kitchen counter with a light clink of glass against glass coming from inside.

Maybe it was also a day-drunk type of visit.

“How is he?” Chrissy asked, blinking up at him with her big earnest eyes.

“I’m… not sure?” Steve shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck a little embarrassed. “I haven’t seen him since yesterday.”

She nodded. “Okay. That’s okay.”

“I think I’m probably going to call over to Robin’s after work.” He muttered, trying to keep his burning blush down. “Hang out for a little bit.”

He didn’t think he needed to say he was doing it to give Chrissy and Eddie their space, to do their ice-cream and chocolate and alcohol and talk about how terrible men were without him hovering. But thankfully she got it, smiling at him so bright it almost hurt to look at.

“Could you…?” She hesitated, pulling the sleeves of her sweater over her fingers. “Could you ask Robin- never mind.”

Steve opened his mouth to assure her it was okay to continue but she barrelled on.

“The boys are coming over later too. Is that okay?”

“The boys?” Did she mean the kids?

“From the band.”

“Oh! Yeah I mean why wouldn’t that be okay? Eddie lives here too.”

“Yeah. I just wanted to check in case-”

“In case I complained about it later?” He tried to ask in his kindest tone. Maybe he’d been guilty of bitching about them in the past but he would never deny Eddie his support system, not at s time like this.

Even if he did… dislike him?

Did he still dislike him?

What was he talking about, of course he did.

“I’m sorry.” Chrissy looked incredibly guilty and Steve couldn’t stand it.

“No, you were right to ask. I haven’t- I’ve been a bit rude in the past.”

She looked like she wanted to apologise again so he shot her a warm smile and patted her on the shoulder. “I have to get to work, but take care of him, yeah?”

She gave him a curious look but nodded, sending him out the door with a wave of her hand, her sleeve following loosely where it was still pulled over her fingers.

Steve was halfway through his shift by the time Robin came in. She worked shorter hours ever since she’d taken that part time internship as a translator.

They’d just gotten past their mid-day coffee rush by the time they had a chance to talk.

“Are you doing anything after this?” He asked her, leaning back against the counter.

“Is this your way of asking me out?” Robin was rifling through the under counter refrigerator next to him, throwing out any old stock that had gone out of date.

“Yes.” Steve nodded. “I’ve been hopelessly in love with you for years and I thought now was the best time to confess.”

“You could have picked a more romantic location.” She sniffed at a container of strawberries, considering before shaking her head and dumping them.

“But my heart told me it had to be now, Birdie.”

Robin just rolled her eyes at him.

“So?” He nudged her with his foot, very nearly sending her off balance. “You, me, two of the best subs this city has and your couch. It’s my best offer.”

She shut the refrigerator door, pushing herself to stand, using the counter for balance. She nearly jumped out of her skin when Steve absentmindedly snapped his fingers at her, remembering.

“Oh! You have a date tonight, right?” 

“I did have a date tonight but sh- he cancelled.”

“He cancelled, did he?” Steve smirked, trying not to enjoy the poorly masked revulsion on Robin’s face at having to pretend to be dating a man.

“Yes. He did. Rain check for another time.”

“Bummer.” 

Robin hadn’t told him much about the girl she was seeing and Steve hadn’t pushed for any more information than she was willing to give. When she wanted him to know, he’d know.

“But-” he continued “-that leaves your schedule wide open for a date with me.” He spread his arms wide open and smiled at her.

“Well, aren't I just the luckiest girl in the world?” She batted her eyelashes at him.

“The luckiest. Any reason for the rain check?”

Robin nodded. “Friend emergency.”

“Oh. That’s sweet.”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “He’s a very sweet…” her nose scrunched up, “boy.”

“Very sweet boy.” He repeated with a smile. “So can I steal your keys? Have everything all spread out for you when you get home?” He dragged his hand down his chest, wiggling his hips.

“God, Steven.” Robin shuddered. “You’re repulsive.”

“Wrong. I am a dish.”

“Ugh. Gag.”

Steve pouted at her. “I’ll get you a milkshake too, how about that?”

She crossed her arms and stuck her nose up. “Fine.”

She could only hold for so long before she started to break, cracking a smile.

“If you two don’t mind,” a voice next to them said and they both jumped, seeing Mark their manager standing there, “could you stop flirting and get back to work?”

Neither of them even bothered arguing that they were not flirting anymore. They both knew the rest of the staff had a betting pool going on when they would get together.

They would be waiting a very long time.

By the time Robin got home, Steve had himself swaddled in her blankets and had stolen her best hot water bottle.

Why did she live somewhere so cold?

His toasty warmth didn’t last very long, however. 

She wrestled the hot water bottle from his grip by resorting to dirty tactics, pulling at his hair until he let it go. 

“How many times have I told you the hair is off limits?” He hissed at her, trying to fix it. His hair was his fucking signature, how could she be so rude?

“That is exactly why I go for it every time. It’s your weak spot.” She grinned, smug in her win and attempting to pull the throw off of him as well.

“Go get one of my sweaters if you’re gonna be such a big bitch baby about it. I just got off work.” She pouted, batting her eyelashes at him. “I’m tired.”

“I brought you subs and milkshakes!”

Robin heaved out a heavy, put upon sigh. “Fine.” She heaved herself up from the couch, still clutching at the hot water bottle and disappeared inside her room.

Steve took the opportunity to swaddle himself again, just getting cosy when he heard Robin call out, “Evie, did you steal my sweater?”

“Which one?” He shouted back. He probably had five or more of hers at home and he wasn’t even sure if all of those had started out as hers or his.

“The blue one!”

“Which blue one?”

“The new blue one!”

“What does it look like?”

“What do you think it looks like, it’s fucking blue!”

Steve rolled his eyes and tried to remember any blue sweaters that existed within his own apartment. 

“I’m pretty sure I don’t have it. I don’t even remember you getting a new blue sweater.”

“Well where the hell is it then?”

“How am I supposed to know? I didn’t even know it existed!”

“You’re supposed to know these things!”

“Maybe the sweater fairy stole it.” He snickered to himself until a dark red sweater that had definitely belonged to him first hit him in the face.

“You are the sweater fairy.” She pouted, sitting back down and stealing the throw from his lap.

“Don’t hate crime me. It’s rude.” He tugged the throw back over his legs, leaving her enough slack to cover herself as well.

Robin reached over to snatch her sub from the coffee table. “So.”

“So.”

“Something’s going on with Eddie.”

“What?” Steve ran through the entire day in his head. He didn’t think he’d mentioned Eddie once. “When did I say there was something going on with Eddie?”

“You didn’t.” Robin’s mouth went slack in the way it usually did whenever she was hiding something but she covered it up with a large bite, speaking through a full mouth. “But you’re here and not at home so…”

“That’s not that unusual.”

“No, but what is unusual is that you asked if you could steal my keys instead of just taking them.”

“Oh.” Yeah. That was not the norm. “Um, well it’s not really my place to say-”

“Who am I going to tell?”

“That’s besides the point.”

“Tell me.” She jabbed him with a sharp elbow.

“I don’t know if I can.” He said, running his hand through his hair.

“I mean, nothing too personal, if you don’t wanna.” She backtracked with a shrug.

“Doesn’t matter what I want. The thing is it’s not my business, it’s Eddie’s.” He shrugged. “But there was some… relationship drama the other night.”

“Ooh. Juicy drama?”

Steve winced. “Not exactly. More like… red flag drama.”

“Oh shit. Chr- I didn’t know that.”

Steve looked at her, bewildered. “I wouldn’t expect you to, how would you know?”

Robin just shrugged, shoving another large bite into her mouth. 

“I don’t really… I’m not comfortable talking about the things Eddie and I talked about but I do need you to help me… figure myself out.”

“Okay, that I can do. I’m an expert at it. I helped you find your sexuality.”

“Find it? It wasn’t fucking lost Birdie.”

“Yeah, but I brought it out into the sunlight.”

“Jesus, you’re acting like you released it from captivity. I knew. I’ve always known. Just because you didn’t know that I know, doesn’t mean I didn’t know.”

She shoved his arm. “I unlocked it.”

He shoved her back. “You didn’t unlock shit.”

She shoved him again. “I unlocked it. You’re welcome.” 

He gave her a final shove with a huff to go right along with it. “Whatever.”

“Okay, no more side tracking. Tell me your scrambly brain thoughts.”

“Alright. Um. Okay. So.” Shit. How much could he tell her without either breaking Eddie’s trust or revealing too much. “So there was drama the other night, between Eddie and the boyfriend, you know that much. I won’t say what happened but he didn’t get home until like four in the morning and he called out of work yesterday and today-”

“He called out?!” Robin shrieked, open mouthed. She’d lived with Eddie long enough and been through enough of Steve’s bitching to know just how much Eddie loved that job.

Steve nodded. “Yeah. It was… it wasn’t good, Birdie, what happened. It was actually really fucking fucked up.”

She nodded, encouraging him to continue.

“So then yesterday he’s trying to sleep it off pretty much and there’s a knock at the door.”

“Oh no.”

“Yeah and I go get it because I had assumed it would be Mrs. Henderson with some chicken noodle soup and you know I’d kill my own mother for some of that soup-”

“-I’d kill your mother for some too, yes.”

“-yeah. But it wasn’t Mrs. Henderson, it was Rick, the boyfriend. Or ex-boyfriend, I don’t know and he was trying to like, bully his way into the apartment to see Eddie and I don’t know what happened with me but-”

“-you went full guard dog protector mode didn’t you?”

“I…” Steve sighed, looking down at his hands. “Yeah, I did. Why did I do that? It’s none of my business. I don’t even like the guy. Why would I care?”

“Because you always care, Evie. You saw someone who needed help and you helped, it’s what you do.”

Steve scoffed. “Hardly. It’s not like I’m some fucking selfless hero for doing it.”

“Nah, you kinda are.”

“It was just some guy!”

“And you’re just some guy too!”

Steve glared at her, offended. “You take that back.”

Robin looked at him for a moment. “Okay, fair, retracted.”

He gave her a small grin and dragged the sleeves of the sweater over his fingers.

“Hey! Stop, you’ll stretch it!”

“What does it matter if I stretch it, it’s mine.”

“It is not.”

“It is too!”

“Is not!”

“Is too!” He jabbed her in the side, knowing full well that if they continued the way they were this could go on all night. It had gone on all night more than once.

Robin squawked and immediately lunged, her hands grabbing at the top of his head. 

“No, no! I told you not the hair!”

“And I told you it’s your weakness.” She hissed, her eyes flashing as he scrambled at her wrists before she could get her fingers buried deep enough.

“Boobies!” He shouted, as loud as possible. The effect was immediate, Robin tried to cringe away from him with a look of disgust. “Boobies, boobies, boobies!”

“Oh my god are you five fucking years old? Can you not say tits or breasts or fucking mammary glands or something like a damn adult?” She wrenched her wrists away from him. “I’m so embarrassed for you.”

“I’m embarrassed of your face.”

“I’m embarrassed of your weird man hair.” She scowled, patting at his chest. 

“You shouldn’t be. Everyone loves the chest hair. Even the lesbians. It’s like a respect thing.”

Robin rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

Steve pouted to himself.

He just wanted to help. He wanted to make sure Eddie was okay, that he would continue to be okay and there was this horrible little part in the back of his head that also wanted to make sure that no one would put their hands on Eddie ever like that again.

It was weird and possessive in a way he really shouldn’t have been feeling about his irritating as shit roommate who didn’t even have the courtesy to play guitar with headphones on half the time.

No matter how good his playing was.

“I can smell your hair burning.”

“What do I do now, Birdie?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like… I want to help, I guess. But I don’t know how. We don’t even like each other, why would he accept my help?”

“Well… how did he react when you did what you did?”

“He… I guess he… I was going to leave when Rick came to the door and he stopped me. He didn’t say anything to me, he didn’t even look at me but he grabbed onto me and… I think he was scared, Rob. I’ve never seen him scared.”

“Well Steve, I think you’re gonna do what you always do. Help. Whether you know you’re doing it or not, whether you even really mean to, you always help.”

"You're making me out to be some sort of saint."

“I’m really not.” She shook her head. “You’re just… you.”

“Wow, incredible observation there, Birdie.”

“Oh, fuck off and finish this for me.” She shoved the rest of her sub into his hands.

Part 1 Part 3 AO3

@augustjustice @geekymagicalpotato @wormdebut @eddielives1986 @releasethexbarakat @a-little-unsteddie @steddietogo @steddiehyperfixation

Big thanks as always to @hbyrde36 for her magnificent beta work and to the @strangerthingswritersguild for their motivation.

Divider by firefly-graphics

[womanofwords]

STEM Kids Shenanigans: Chapter 9

Chapter 9: The Unseen

Layla Ismail was good at being unseen. She had perfected it until it was an art form. Or maybe it would be better to call it a science, considering it relied upon strict rules being followed, formulas being created and discarded, and experiments carried out. Although she was sure that her mother would strongly disapprove if she could see how she acted in school, there were some advantages to not being noticed. To not be seen was to not be bullied, to not be seen was to not be singled out, to not be seen was to not be interrupted when she enjoyed her own company.

But then she did something that she thought she would never do, that nobody thought she would ever do.

She made friends.

Now there were three people at school that consistently noticed her. They talked to her and waved at her from the other side of rooms and said her name loudly so people turned to look at her. She was eating lunch faster to be with them and was sitting with them instead of her own little bubble. It was nice to spend time with them.

They weren't the only people that were noticing her. There was also Melanie, the nuisance prefect and teacher's pet that insisted on meddling in their meetings, even though they had done nothing wrong. What was her problem?

She would have to use her very best stealth skills to find out.

(PAUSE)

That Thursday, Layla followed Melanie around the school as she did her prefect duties. So this is what it's like to tail someone, she thought to herself. I know what she's like with her enemies. Now let's see what she's like with her friends.

Melanie confidently strode up to another prefect that was smaller and looked younger, opening her mouth to start a conversation. But she was shut down before she got a chance to speak. "Leave me alone, Sainsbury," he said abruptly, moving away hurriedly and with disgust as if she was a stray dog begging for scraps. "Talking to you is social suicide."

That was not what Layla had been expecting. She'd figured that behind the little room where the prefects had their meeting (wherever that was in the wretched dump they called a school), the prefects were all best friends who laughed together about all the power they had and celebrated victories and commiserated losses together. Although now she had had that thought in full, it did seem rather childish to believe that everyone was buddies.

As she followed Melanie around school grounds (from a safe distance so she wasn't spotted), she realized that the scrawny male prefect wasn't the only one to have that reaction to the brunette prefect teacher's pet. Melanie Sainsbury was probably the most unpopular person in school. It showed up in the arrogant way she talked down to students, in the way she called out people for the slightest infraction and continued to scold them even while they corrected their mistake and apologized, the way she wouldn't even give you the time of day if she was too busy.

"Dante was right; the nickname Snitch Sainsbury fits Melanie really well," Layla said to herself, as she watched Melanie drag some unfortunate wrongdoer to a teacher so they could be berated and humiliated a second time.

At the end of lunch, Layla spied Melanie eating a sad-looking pizza slice and drinking something out of a thermos on a bench near the library's entrance.

I almost feel sorry for her, Layla thought, as she snuck off to afternoon registration. But then I remember that she's Melanie Sainsbury.

To read the other parts of this fic, see Masterlist.

[sockablock]

When Essek's old alter ego is suddenly asked by Da'leth to work at Soltryce Academy, nine semi-retired adventurers are thrust back into a web of danger, intrigue, and wizardly shenanigans. (Surprise, surprise! I’m back with another Shadowgast WIP)

Chapter 1: The Worst-Case Scenario

Caleb watched Essek hover back and forth like a miniature, panicked storm cloud.

“This is ridiculous! It must be some kind of joke. We haven't had any contact for years, and now he expects me to believe him? What is he playing at?”

“Breathe, Essek, breathe. You will not solve this mystery by wearing a hole in—above—the carpet.”

“What?” Essek looked down, then stopped floating. “Oh. My apologies. I’m a bit…well, you know.”

“I would be too.” There was urging in Caleb’s voice. “Take a seat, Schatz. Let me see the letter.”

Essek obliged, handing over a crumpled scroll right before collapsing heavily into his chair. The fire of a cold late-autumn evening cast their den in gold and orange light.

“Does he explain himself?” Caleb turned the scroll the right way around. “Does he say why?”

“Has Da’leth ever done that?” Essek snorted. “All he wrote was that I—rather, that Thain, had been selected. And I only have two days to respond.”

Caleb waved his hand, and a glowing orb appeared. He brought it closer to the parchment. “May I?”

“Please.”

“To the esteemed Lord Dezran Thain of Nicodranas—good grief. He really isn’t subtle.”

“Tell me about it,” Essek said.

“Perhaps,” Caleb continued, “you are aware of the ongoing investigations into the Cerberus Assembly. If so, then perhaps you have also heard that Archmage Tversky and Archmage Margolin will be leaving our ranks by the end of the week—ah yes, Beau was quite proud of that.”

“She should be,” Essek said miserably. “It’s about time. Read the next part.”

“And so it falls on the surviving members of our organization to fill these vacant roles. We believe, for the safety and stability of our country, that the next Archmages of Conscription and Dysology should come from within the Empire; however, it has been brought to our attention that adding a Nicodranian mage to our ranks could be quite valuable. Such an alliance would strengthen our ties to the Menagerie Coast, as well as assuage any concerns that the Empire is isolationist or inflexible. Therefore, as we have been friends for some time—really?”

Essek made a face. “I would not have called him my ‘friend’ in any form, but we have known each other for a few decades. Unfortunately.”

“Unfortunately,” Caleb commiserated. He smoothed out the letter and found his place again. “—I wished to have the pleasure of informing you that on behalf of the Cerberus Assembly, you, Lord Dezran Thain of Nicodranas, have been extended the honor of replacing Archmage Margolin in his secondary capacity—as the distinguished and peerless Headmaster of the Soltryce Academy. Oh. My gods.”

Essek groaned. He had his head buried in his hands.

“You Identified this already?” Caleb managed eventually.

Essek nodded. “I wish I hadn’t.”

Caleb continued to stare at the letters. The fluid, curving script seemed to blur all together. “That’s…gods,” he said again.

“Agreed.”

“I…can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now.”

Essek snorted. “Actually, if anyone could, it would be you.” Then something occurred to him. Suddenly, the hearth shone an odd color in his eyes. “This was delivered to our home. To this house, in Rexxentrum. Yours. That…bastard.”

Caleb was quick to understand. He took a deep breath, then reached over for Essek’s hand.

“Maybe it was just enchanted to find you wherever you are. Like a Sending spell.”

“I’d hate to think otherwise. That would mean—”

Caleb interrupted him out of mercy. “Every inch of our tower is warded from divination. Besides, you’ve adopted an endless array of personas. I don’t even think we’ve been seen together with you as Thain, not since the party years ago.”

“Still.” Essek rubbed his eyes. “The timing makes me think he knows something. That, and the fact that it’s for Thain, I mean—what has Thain accomplished? I don’t even remember telling anyone I was a mage!”

“That, ah…that might have been Jester’s fault. She really enjoyed adding to your personas. You needed a past, after all, otherwise you would have just appeared from nowhere.”

“So she told everyone that Thain was a famous wizard?”

“The best lies are often true,” Caleb shrugged. “Though I admit that she might have gone a little overboard. You know how much she likes to praise her friends.”

It was a testament to Essek’s troubled mood that he barely acknowledged this. Caleb squeezed his fingers. “They said…they did say you could reject them. And their political reasoning is not unsound. Maybe that is all there is to it—the Assembly needs someone to be the Headmaster, and they thought of you.”

Even after so many years of trying, Caleb’s reassuring voice still left some things desired. Essek shut his eyes.

“My love, the very idea that the Cerberus Assembly is even thinking of me is a nightmare.”

 “Fair enough.”

“I just want to know why,” Essek muttered. “Why now? Why me? What is he after?”

“I don’t know,” Caleb said. “I wish I did.”

Essek suddenly turned toward him. “I—I hate to ask this, but can you find out? You know…ask our old friend the newest Archmage.”

“Ah.” Caleb’s face gave a complicated shuffle, one common these days when Astrid was mentioned.

“If you don’t want to—” Essek hurried.

“No, no, I can…try.” He scratched his chin. “She’s just been less open, lately. She’s not…pleased by how thorough the Soul is being. Beauregard is relentless.”

“It has been seven years. That’s a lot for your kind, but probably just enough for Da’leth to finally realize they mean business—” Essek blinked. “Do you think that’s why he picked me?”

“We don’t know that he’s behind this,” Caleb said lamely. At Essek’s expression, he relented. “Alright, alright. I’ll stop suggesting otherwise.”

“It’s not unappreciated, I just prefer to be direct. It is clear that Da’leth is trying to use me again. This time, in order to hurt you and the Cobalt Soul. There is no point in believing otherwise.”

Caleb brushed Essek’s face. “No, that would require him to think he could use you in the first place. But that is impossible, because Thain does not know Widogast.”

“He does, though.”

“Yes, but is Da’leth aware of that? He cannot be.”

“I thought we put an end to that.”

“Only to statements of idle hope, not facts.” Caleb was now holding both his hands. “The truth of the matter is that…yes, perhaps the Martinet does want you for some devious plan—”

“Oh, lovely—”

“—however, any plan he has cannot be based on our connection. We have been doing this…being us, for seven years now, Essek. If he were going to play against that hand, he would have done so already. This must be something else.”

Essek huffed. “What, though? What reason does he have? I haven’t been important to the Kryn for years. I resigned, I’m virtually a stranger there, and I certainly don’t have any more secrets for sale.” He paused. “Well, ones that Ludinus would desire. I’m useless to him.”

“I highly doubt that,” Caleb said. And his voice, while kind, had a faint edge to it. “You are right in that there probably is some motivation here. It might be related to the investigation in other ways—after all, two members of the Assembly are leaving. That makes four upheavals in under a decade. And if the Soul and the crown are both pushing for the appointment of more partial Archmages, then it might very well be the case that Da’leth just wants someone he can control. In your case, through blackmail.”

“Hooray for me.”

“He probably wouldn’t, though,” Caleb said. “Since, as you said, this is a situation of mutually assured destruction.”

Essek grimaced. “I have been somewhat wishful in that department. Even with your support, it is still my word against the Martinet.”

“Our word. That includes the Cobalt Soul.”

Essek shook his head. “You’ve seen how well he’s stood up to them so far. Can you honestly say that my safety is a sure thing? Don’t lie to me, Caleb.”

There was a pause.

“Essek, I will do everything in my power to protect you.”

"I know." He patted Caleb on the hand.

Outside their tower, far away, the evening bells of the Rexxentrum began to ring. One, and then two, and then almost a dozen, loud and bronze across the dimming sky.

“There is one way to find out for sure what Da’leth is planning.”

Essek sighed. “I know. But I don’t like it.”

Caleb leaned back in his seat. “Neither do I.”

The cry of the great bells waned. In their den, all around the wall, points of magelight flared to life—flickering and purple harbingers of night.

“Will you do it?” Caleb said.

“I don’t know if I have a choice.”

“You do,” Caleb said. “The worst-case scenario is that Da’leth tries to talk, and we…deal with that.”

“We’ve been trying to deal with him for years,” Essek said. “And…maybe this is bold of me to say, but the worst-case scenario isn’t that—it’s not knowing. Maybe I can…maybe I can find the answers here. If Da’leth thinks he is controlling me, if he trusts me to do his bidding, maybe I can finally learn something to break his hold.”

“As long as he never truly controls you,” Caleb said. “That is a risk I cannot accept.”

This time, Essek was the one to offer assurance. He gently pressed a kiss to Caleb’s hand.

“You forget,” he said wryly. “I am a powerful wizard. Haven’t you heard my title?”

“Shadowhand?” Caleb said. He did not look fully mollified, but he managed a chuckle. “I thought you were retired.”

Essek smiled. “I was, my love, but now it seems that I have a new role. Starting soon...you will be sharing your home with the next Headmaster of the Soltryce Academy.”

—

✨ Ko-Fi Link in Bio! ✨ | Requests are OPEN :3

[britishassistant]

I wonder what the supervillains (the dorm leaders) would do if they get switched with their other self in Twisted Wonderland.

They'll meet a younger Yuu calls them senpai and probably get shivers when they hear someone shout Prefect but then realize its Yuu's role in that world.

Bonus would be if Yuuken's there too, sharing the dorm with Yuu.

Thank you for the ask, dear anon!

I decided to take a little inspo from my Villainous Paranoiac series for this one! Not a whole lot, but the idea of Twisted Wonderland Yuu being put in the infirmary after the events of Chapter Five!

(Also consider it non-canon, since it kinda involves everyone’s identities being exposed!)

Basically imagine that the supervillains find themselves in what looks like a private school infirmary, late at night. The air is buzzing with a strange energy, almost like the powers back in their home world, but...different, somehow.

The room nearly empty, save for one occupant in a cot close to the door.

Poison Queen and King immediately begin bickering over whose fault this mess is, while Royal Flush tries to get them to keep their voices down or else they’ll be detected. Charon is half a minute from going to curl up in a corner, clutching his freeze ray like a lifeline, while Octo Dealer and Snake Charmer are busy inspecting their surroundings for anything of value or that can be requisitioned into a weapon on short notice.

Tsunotaro has wandered over to inspect the sole other living being in the room with them.

He is pleasantly surprised to see what looks like a younger version of the reporter he’s so fond of, fast asleep in the infirmary cot. Their cheeks still retain the last bit of baby fat from childhood, and there’s some acne left that will fade with age. He may give one cheek a gentle poke, just to satisfy his curiosity. The sleepy mumble they let out is a little more high pitched than normal, but that’s the reporter’s voice alright.

He is less pleased to see dark circles under their eyes, or the bandages around their throat that stink of medicinal salves. If this truly is a younger version of his child of man, then why do they look so worried, even in sleep? Why are they injured and sleeping in this place of healing in the first place? They’re a mere child, barely old enough to operate a vehicle or live alone. Their only worries should be trivial things, not whatever is causing this furrow in their brow and hunch in their shoulders.

The other supervillains have begun to migrate over to where Tsunotaro is crouching in silent contemplation. King flips his eyepatch up to get a better look, whistling lowly. Octo Dealer busies himself with refilling their water glass, sneaking glances at them as he places it within easy reach. Snake Charmer pulls their pillow more under their head from where it’s almost slipped off. Poison Queen straightens the arrangement of the very tasteful bouquet on the bedside table, so the flowers’ best angle is shown to the bed’s occupant. Royal Flush carefully tucks their covers in over them.

Charon takes a picture with his tablet.

He forgot to turn off his flash.

Yuu cracks their eyes open...

To see seven adults looming over their bed in masks that resemble the ink from the overblots that haunt the Prefect’s nightmares.

Cue terrified screaming.

Snake Charmer lunges forward instinctively to cover Yuu’s mouth—

It’s only thanks to Poison Queen yanking him back that he doesn’t end up with an arrow in the shoulder.

Several more follow the first one through the window above the prefect’s cot, cold iron sharp and perfectly aimed to seriously maim if the supervillains don’t immediately get away from the screaming teenager. Rook was lax in protecting the Trickster after VDC ended, assuming there was no more danger after Roi du Poison’s overblot was saved. He will not make that mistake again.

The infirmary doors burst open, a younger Yuuken in a sleep-rumpled uniform barging in from where he decided to sleep outside because Ramshackle felt too empty and quiet to bear, but was forbidden from staying in the infirmary himself. He only has a pillow, but he brandishes it at the strange adults, fully willing to defend his dorm mate in whatever way he can.

The vanguard appears in a flurry of bats though, too many to fight off, small and vicious and furious. Their commander materializes in the center if the swarm, hovering over the head of Yuu’s cot, pink eyes brimming with a cold rage that makes his small and cute form look like it’s bursting at the seams holding something much older and angrier back. He opens his mouth, fangs long and glistening—

Only to stop short at the sight of one of the supervillains. “Malleus? Malleus Draconia?”

Tsunotaro nods warily.

“Wh-What in Twisted Wonderland are you wearing??”

Tsunotaro ducks his head like a chastened child. “I could say the same thing.” He mutters sullenly.

From there the lights get turned on, and the seven supervillains are made to explain themselves to the sleep-deprived students and staff who trickle in to see what’s going on. All six dorm leaders and one vice dorm leader vanished from their beds, setting everyone on high alert until news of these...alternate versions spread.

It is very weird for the supervillains to see all their minions as teenagers (again in some cases). It is only surpassed by how weird it is for everyone else to see their dorm heads and vice head all grown up and adult, even if they are dressed weird.

Ortho still wants to shoot them with a beam until they bring back his nii-san. Luckily Charon is able to convince him that Idia should be fine if he’s in Charon’s lair—he’s got plenty of the latest games, manga and tech for him to play with, so that should keep him occupied for a while.

Sebek is in a state of Malleus awe. He has shut down and will not restart. Silver has taken to pinching himself just to make sure this isn’t a Lilia’s cooking induced fever dream, while Lilia himself scolds Tsunotaro that he raised him better than to go around watching people sleep like that! Tsunotaro tries to use the “but I’m a supervillain” excuse, only for Lilia to shoot back “and I’m a war criminal in some nations, what’s your point?”

King is enjoying watching the overgrown lizard get scolded. Now if only the tiny Ruggie would stop asking him what injury the eyepatch is for, and making remarks about how embarrassing it would be if it were totally pointless—King does not pay his adult self so much to put up with this shit. The baby Jack also needs to stop demanding to know if his adult minion self can pull a sled faster than a moose or something...

Jade and Floyd are attempting to wind up the adult Octo Dealer, trying to see how much they can get away with compared with the normal Azul. Octo Dealer is legitimately at a loss as to how this world’s Azul doesn’t keep them in line without letting them turn to a crime or two. Then he learns about Azul’s contract business and feels a pang of commiseration and understanding.

Poison Queen, Royal Flush, and Snake Charmer are unpleasantly shocked when their dorms address them by their respective secret identities in front of their fellow supervillains out of the blue.

Poison Queen has to put up with King’s uncontrolled laughter as he finally understands the full extent of the incident with White Neige so long ago, while Tsunotaro tries to tell him he liked Schoenheit in his role as the evil dragon prince in the GaoGao dramatization. Royal Flush is about two seconds away from throttling Octo Dealer if the bastard doesn’t stop trying to make a deal to guarantee his mother doesn’t learn about her son’s private activities. Snake Charmer’s just glad his civilian identity flies under the radar enough that Charon has to try and look him up to understand who he is (and fails because he’s not on school wifi and his cellular data is bust).

Poison Queen is also getting a headache from Rook rhapsodizing about how his villain form is another, enhanced mode of beauty he is fortunate to lay eyes upon, as if he hadn’t been willing to skewer Poison Queen along with the rest of the supervillains five minutes ago. He’s at least able to amuse himself by letting Epel run away with his speculations about how he’s the buff hyper-masculine muscle for Poison Queen.

Kalim is crying that Jamil had to resort to becoming a villain in his home world! He must be so sad if he has to do that! He’s mildly cheered up when Snake Charmer tells him they work together on schemes, and that Snake Charmer is actually reasonably happy with his chosen vocation—and then he begins panicking that Jamil will like that world so much, he won’t want to come back.

Royal Flush is glad his counterpart at least has good people around to look after him, even if it is odd to have young versions of Trey and Cater trying to mother hen him despite the fact that he’s the older one now. At least Ace and Deuce acting up seems more fitting now considering their age than it ever did on their adult selves.

Ace huffs a sigh and leans on Yuu’s shoulder. “This is a mess, huh Prefect?”

“You said it.” Yuu replies. “I just wanna sleep forever.”

The supervillains go still.

“I’m sorry,” Snake Charmer says carefully. “But isn’t Enma-san the Prefect?”

“No?” Yuuken replies, confused. “Yuu’s the prefect of Ramshackle Dorm. I’m their vice— or would be, if we had any other students apart from them, me, and Grim.”

Octo Dealer laughs, sounding slightly strained. “Ah, apologies, but you see, that isn’t possible. It can’t be. Yuu isn’t—”

“But I am the prefect, Azul-senpai.” Yuu the Prefect says. “I’ve–I’ve always been the prefect.”

There’s a stunned silence.

Royal Flush places his head in his hands. “What the fuck.”

Back in the Supervillain AU universe, Yuu the Reporter sneezes sharply while trying to wrangle five frightened teenagers, one frightened-but-playing-tough twenty year old, and one confused however-old-he-is-but-younger-than-Tsunotaro fae.

They wonder what the chill down their spine is.

[jayeray-hq]

How He Shows You Affection: Sugawara Koushi

Requested by the wonderful @lavenderpup sorry it took so long! I took a hiatus for a while, but I hope you still enjoy it! 😊💖

Post Time Skip/Manga Ending Spoilers!

Warnings: Slightest itty bit of hinted NSFW!

How He Shows You Affection Master List - Character Masterlist

He Rubs Your Cheeks Together

“Hey, sorry I’m late!” you told the group, as you hurried up to them, “The trains were running behind schedule!”

“Don’t worry,” Kiyoko assured you, a kind smile on her pretty face, “You’re not the last one to arrive.”

“Is Koushi not here yet?” you asked glancing around the group. This was meant to be a reunion of the third years from the Karasuno volleyball team, but considering Kiyoko was engaged to Tanaka, and Asahi was dating Nishinoya, it had turned into more of a second- and third-years thing.

A familiar pair of arms around your waist answered your question as you were tugged into a firm chest, your boyfriend’s face rubbing up affectionately against yours as he asked teasingly, “Are you gossiping about me already, honey?”

Tanaka, who’d been standing surprisingly quietly next to Kiyoko politely holding her hand looked utterly scandalized at the display of public affection. If he was a sixties housewife he definitely would’ve been clutching at his pearls, though Kiyoko just looked amused and fond.

You’d grown used to how affectionate your boyfriend was, even in public and didn’t even blush nowadays, which always made him whine a bit, claiming he missed the good old days where you got flustered and stuttered every time he did it. However, you knew he didn’t actually mind given the smitten look he gave you every time you melted into his hold instead of stiffening up the way you used to.

His favorite move, and the one he almost always used to greet you was wrapping you into a hug from behind and nuzzling his face against yours, rubbing your cheeks together in a sweet affectionate gesture that never failed to make you melt.

You’d been a little self-conscious about it at first, especially since you’d gotten a lot of scandalized looks like Tanaka’s given Japan’s views on public displays of affection. However, the few times someone had actually said something about it, somehow your boyfriend had talked circles around them, and in the end, you’d get away with it, sometimes even getting fond looks instead.

A good example of this was your landlady, who’d glared and sniffed every time she’d seen the two of you when you’d first moved in. One conversation with Sugawara later and she’d changed her tune, claiming the two of you reminded her of her and her husband back in the day. Now you got fond looks, indulgent smiles and even cookies from time to time. She even went so far as to scold others who looked sideways at the two of you.

It was completely and utterly ridiculous, something you’d commiserated on with the other third years more than once. According to Kiyoko, Sugawara just had one of those faces that let him get away with anything. Given that she also had one of those faces you took her word for it, and for the most part let him do as he pleased, though you did try to stop if it looked like someone was genuinely uncomfortable.

“Koushi,” you scolded lightly, “You’re upsetting your kouhai.”

“Eh, he needs to toughen up some,” Sugawara told you, snickering slightly at Tanaka’s expression, though he did let go of you after one last affectionate rub and instead laced his fingers together with yours offering you an affectionate smile, “Especially if he’s going to do a good job taking care of Shimizu.”

“Suga-senpai!” Tanaka protested as Kiyoko giggled into her hand.

“Koushi, you know Shimizu doesn’t need him to take care of her, if anything it’s going to be her taking care of him,” you teased lightly, making your boyfriend and Kiyoko both laugh brightly.

“Your girlfriend is just as bad as you are,” Tanaka informed your boyfriend, though there was a definite smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“I know,” Sugawara said, clear pride in his voice as he pressed an affectionate smacking kiss to your cheek, “Isn’t she just the best?”

“Really Suga, you shouldn’t tease our kouhai so much,” Daichi intervened, though he also looked incredibly amused by the whole exchange.

“Tanaka makes it too easy,” your boyfriend told him with a shrug, “Besides someone’s got to give him a hard time now that Kiyoko’s given in to him, that and none of the other second years are nearly as fun.”

“Speaking of second years, where are Nishinoya and Asahi?” you asked, chiming in to save Tanaka from Sugawara’s ruthless teasing as you finally realized who was missing from the group.

“We’re here!” A familiar voice called, and you turned just in time to see the rather comical sight of Nishinoya tugging Asahi down the street by his hand, practically dragging the larger man behind him, “Sorry we’re late we got distracted!”

“We can see that,” Sugawara stated dryly, his eyes tracing over their clearly rumpled and hastily put together appearances, “Asahi, just what have you been doing with our precious kouhai?”

The long haired third year immediately began to splutter as Nishinoya laughed loudly, clearly unbothered at the implication. The group of you set off together, headed for dinner, all of you laughing and smiling as your boyfriend teased his newest victim, with Sugawara’s fingers laced affectionately with yours, refusing to lose contact for even a second as you went about your night.

He Tells You He Cares

“Have a good day at school, and say hi to your class for me,” you told your boyfriend as you casually straightened his tie, and pressed a quick kiss to his waiting lips.

“I will,” he assured you with a bright smile as he scooped up his suitcase though he paused in the doorway to turn back and tell you, “I love you!”

“I love you too,” you assured him with a soft smile, watching as he walked out the door with a cheerful bounce in his step.

It was a routine that the two of you completed every morning almost without fail, and even when you couldn’t Sugawara always made it a point to tell you he loved you before he left to go anywhere. Even if you were asleep or he thought you were sleeping he’d still press a tender kiss to your forehead or cheek and whisper how much he loved you before walking out the door.

With so many repetitions and routine you’d think the words would lose their meaning, just a ritual part of your day with no thought or true emotion behind them. However, it simply wasn’t true.

You’d asked your boyfriend before why he insisted on saying it so often, you’d been curious, especially since Japanese culture didn’t put a large emphasis on saying the words out loud the way other cultures did.

As a teacher your boyfriend was incredibly articulate and usually able to express himself incredibly well. When you’d asked though he’d seemed to struggle to find the right words. He had gotten very thoughtful, and told you that it was because he wanted to remind both of you that at the end of the day he loved you no matter what was happening in your lives.

You’d been a bit confused about his reasoning at the time, and a little unhappy as well. You could understand maybe needing to remind you that he loved you, he shouldn’t need to remind himself that he loved you right? It just hadn’t made sense, and your boyfriend wasn’t able to properly explain, just insisted that it was important to him. You certainly hadn’t minded, and so figured there wasn’t any harm in it even if you didn’t understand.

You kept that mindset right up until your first fight as a couple after you’d moved in together. Sugawara had headed for the door to leave for a while to clear his head and let both of you calm down. However, he’d paused in the doorway and looked back to tell you he loved you.

It had taken away all the sting of him leaving for a bit, and reminded you that not only did he love you, you loved him too, and at the end of the day that was what mattered most, not whatever petty thing you’d been arguing about. The reminder was enough to help soothe you into a better frame of mind for when he returned. The two of you had been able to resolve your fight calmly and rationally after that, with apologies and ‘I love you’s on both sides.

His words about it being a reminder had clicked for you then, and from that point on you made it a point to tell him you loved him before you left too, something that never failed to make him beam at you, warm and full of affection.

It helped that you’d both promised that if ever there was a day when you didn’t actually mean the words that you wouldn’t say them at all. However you were rather almost certain that day would never come. You couldn’t imagine someone better suited to you than Sugawara who reminded you each and every how very much he loved you, and how much you loved him too.

He Surprises You

The sound of someone knocking at the front door pulled you away from the mindless scrolling you’d been doing on your phone and prompted you to pull yourself up from the couch, confused about who might be interrupting you on your day off. Your normal suspect would’ve been your boyfriend, but not only did he have a key, he was at school much to your mutual disappointment. However the day off had been unexpected, so he hadn’t been able to take a vacation day in advance and was not so irresponsible that he would call in sick when he wasn’t. He loved the kids too much for that.

It turned out you probably should’ve continued to suspect your boyfriend, as he was the culprit behind the interruption, if not the culprit himself. The delivery guy kindly passed you a bouquet of your favorite flowers, just the sight of them bringing a smile to your face as you signed for them, and then brought them into the kitchen where you could admire them.

The bouquet came with a handwritten note that read…

I hope you’re enjoying your day off! When I get home, let’s go on a date okay?

Love,

Koushi

You smiled a little helplessly at the familiar writing, realizing your boyfriend must’ve stopped by the shop personally to pick something out and leave a note for you to read. Your heart felt close to overflowing with affection for him as you snapped a quick picture of your flowers and sent him a quick text to thank him and that it was a definite yes to date night.

Your boyfriend had always been a thoughtful person, but sometimes it still caught you by surprise just how thoughtful he truly was. Sugawara liked to surprise people, and he’d told you once that sweet surprises were the best kind. Looking at your flowers you couldn’t help but agree with him.

He was always doing things like this for you, sending your favorite flowers, making you a cute lunch, buying something small that had reminded him of you and bringing it home as a gift. It never failed to make you feel soft, especially since it proved that he was always thinking of you. You loved it, though you’d told him more than once he was spoiling you.

Sugawara had just shrugged at the accusation and sent you one of his beaming smiles, the kind that never failed to make your heart flip over in your chest, and told you, you deserved to be spoiled. It made you want to spoil him too, the look on his face always worth it when you took time out of your day to make or buy something for him.

With that in mind you quietly began to plan a surprise or two of your own, your previously rather boring, if productive day brightening as you daydreamed about the things you’d like to do for your sweet boyfriend, coming up with several interesting ideas. Time practically flew by, and before you knew it, it was getting close to the time school was letting out.

Carefully you snagged one of the pretty blooms from the bouquet you’d been sent, and tucked it behind your ear, grabbing your things as you practically danced out the door. Sugawara was right after all, pleasant surprises were the best, and you were going to start by picking him up from school. You couldn’t wait to get started on all your ideas, hoping you could make Sugawara feel just as loved as he always did for you.

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[kravkalackin]

Lup had told him that sneaking into the gala at the palace was only a bad idea if he got caught. Taako had agreed at the time, but now he was willing to adjust that claim slightly. 

This was only a bad idea if he got caught and wasn’t able to get himself out of it. 

He was desperately looking for that out now as the security guard had him cornered in the hallway, up against some wallpaper that probably cost more than their entire apartment. The stuff he currently had shoved in his bag definitely cost more than he could afford if this douche decided to search him. 

“I told you, I’m just waiting for my fiance,” Taako insisted, and the old guard didn’t look like he believed him any more than he did the first two times. 

“And I told you that visitors are not allowed in this part of the palace. Now please show me some sort of identification or I will be forced to remove you from the premises,” the guard said, his hand resting oh so casually on the hilt of his sword now. Taako nodded quickly, moving like he was going to grab an ID out of his bag. 

“Of course I can show you some- oh!” he stopped, something akin to hope starting to come back to him as he heard someone walking towards them from further into the castle. He’d mostly been hoping for a distraction, but when he saw the guy who turned the corner Taako figured that yeah, okay, he could work with this. 

“I told you I was just waiting for my fiance! Babe, tell him this is all just a huge misunderstanding,” Taako said, and the guard turned to look at who Taako was speaking to. He was probably the most handsome man Taako had seen tonight, which had so far been a night of some exceedingly handsome men. His hair was braided back into a neat bun, decorated with gold that matched the rather modest make up he had on. His suit was also simple, but Taako wouldn’t have been surprised if it out cost everything in Taako’s bag. 

He also looked thrown completely off guard by the situation, which Taako couldn’t blame him for. Still, Taako flashed him what he would consider a very winning smile, winking as the guard was still looking away. 

And then the old guard dropped to a knee, and it was dawning on Taako that he might have miscalculated here. 

“Prince Kravitz, I am terribly sorry for the disturbance. I do not know who this is but I will remove this liar from the castle immediately,” the guard said, and oh yeah, this was not his best move. Taako couldn’t do anything as the guard quickly got back to his feet and went to grab him. 

Before he could though the prince walked forward, an amused grin on his face as he put a hand up for the old guy to stop. 

“There’s no need for that,” he said, walking right up to Taako now. “Darling, I thought we both agreed to keep the news to ourselves until the public announcement,” the prince said, and it took a few long, dumbstruck seconds for Taako to realize what was happening. 

He was actually playing along. 

“I know, but he wouldn’t stop pestering me!” he whined, pouting a little and moving to wrap himself around the prince’s arm. Because hey, he wouldn’t get another chance at this, might as well take advantage for all it’s worth. 

“I apologize my liege, I did not know,” the guard said, and Prince Kravitz turned back towards him. 

“That’s quite all right Leon. Your dedication in keeping the castle safe is appreciated,” he said, and Taako stuck his tongue out at the guard while the prince wasn’t looking. He quickly schooled his face back into something more mature than a six year old when he turned back towards him. “We haven’t had a chance to introduce you to the security staff yet, have we?” he asked, and Taako grinned as he shook his head. 

“Yeah sorry, the uh, chariot traffic was real bad on the way over,” he said, turning back towards the guard with as smug of a look as he could muster. “I’m Taako, from uh, New Elfington,” he added, and the guard did not look very impressed. 

“Shall we get to the party Taako? I’m sorry to keep you waiting, they like to insist on the royal family entering last,” he said and Taako grinned at that. 

“Don’t even worry about it babe, let’s go,” he said, and well this day had certainly turned around. As they walked the guard followed along, and Taako got the sense he still didn’t entirely trust him yet. They were walking arm in arm though, and Kravitz seemed to take that as an opportunity to lean down, whispering in his ear. 

“New Elfington huh? I wonder what kind of trade deals our marriage could arrange with such an exotic place,” Kravitz said, the sarcasm clear in his voice. Taako didn’t expect the prince to have such a sense of humor, he was into it. 

“I’ll tell you all about em over some fancy cocktails, what do you say?” he asked, and Kravitz grinned at that. 

“I’d say we have quite a bit to discuss, yes,” he said, which was fair. Taako was lucky as fuck that the dude was apparently willing to just fuck with some random guard instead of throw out an obvious criminal. 

When they got to the entrance to the ball the guard quickly stepped in front of then. 

“My lord, allow me to introduce the both of you to the guests,” he said, and the panic was starting to come back again. 

“Oh that’s not-” he started, Kravitz quickly shaking his head as well. 

“There’s really no need,” the prince insisted, but with a pointed look at Taako the guard quickly went through the door, and the two of them were left frozen in place as they heard the guard loudly announce to the ballroom full of the most powerful and influential people in the surrounding kingdoms. 

“Everyone! Please welcome your Prince Kravitz,” he started, and Taako should run at this point but all he could do was listen in horror as the guard continued.  “As well as his fiance, Taako of New Elfington,” he finished, and even on the other side of the door they could hear the shocked murmurs. 

“My mom’s going to kill me,” Kravitz muttered, a dread in his voice that Taako could feel down in his soul. Before he could commiserate on his similar upcoming death at the hands of his sister the large double doors were opening in front of them. 

Standing at the top of a staircase now, Taako could see that quite literally every eye in the ball was on the two of them. Kravitz put on a clearly fake grin and Taako could do nothing but follow along as he led them both down the stairs. 

He was starting to think this might have been a mistake. 

There was no fucking way he was getting out of this one. 

[multimetaverse]

HSMTMTS 2x09 Review

Spring Break was a bit of an odd ep but helped move some key plots forward. Let’s dig in!

Well people can no longer claim that Portwell is one sided. We finally got Gina’s pov and she starts off the ep uncertain whether the shift in their relationship means that EJ likes her but by the end of the ep she seems sure of herself and that EJ likes her back. I liked that she didn’t try to pretend that nothing had changed or that she hadn’t noticed potential signs that EJ might like her; it always sucks when tv characters act like idiots. 

Perhaps the most important reveal of this ep was that Gina has a much older estranged brother who left her and her mom many years ago. That certainly makes her backstory more tragic and is definite set up for her brother to eventually return.

The writers continue to give Portwell great tropes, capping this ep off with an airport rom-com trope that also calls back to EJ getting Gina the place ticket so she could come back in S1. Not only did Gina keep EJ’s Duke sweatshirt but she altered it to fit her better which is both sweet and bold in the assumption that it was hers to keep. Gina got her sign when not only did EJ show up to drive Gina home and take her luggage but he brought her the granola bar that she had wanted but forgot to pack. I wonder if her posting on her story that she was ubering home after her flight was cancelled was intended to see if EJ would show up since the camera focused on her posting it. Also sweet that she’s taken to calling EJ, ‘ Eej’. 

EJ’s opening was good, shows a lot of his character growth from the selfish guy he was in S1 and how he’s learned to value other people which of course leads into his feelings for Gina. We got another great use of the camera as character tonight when Gina was laughing after her facetime call with EJ until she realized that the camera was on her. 

Jack was a lot of fun. Though he didn’t really change Gina’s mind over anything like the ep description said he would.  Seemed like Gina was largely over Ricky and wondering about EJ at the beginning and the end solidified her feelings for EJ but Jack didn’t really play a role in that, it’s not like he encouraged Gina to reach out to EJ or anything. There’s a vague sense in which Jack being nomadic linked him to Ricky’s unreliability in Gina’s eyes with her craving stability but that’s a stretch. Jack mentioned that the second most dangerous part of a plane ride is when the plane takes off, a hint to the blossoming Portwell relationship where in order to take off one or both of them has to risk a confession even though they could be turned down.

This ep might seem a bit weird in hindsight. The zoom parts probably won’t age well and five years from now people might be wondering why they had Gina hang out with a manic pixie dream boy of sorts for an ep.

The path is clear for canon Portwell in the finale with EJ being Gina’s second chance at romance and her first kiss since they clearly telegraphed it out of nowhere. I’ve been impressed with the great work the writers have been doing since 2x05 to build up Portwell as a ship but also work on Gina and EJ as individual characters; they’ve been the highlight of the season so far. 

There was discourse this past week over how well or poorly Portwell has been set up. Objectively very few ships on this show get much in the way of set up or consistent writing. Redlyn and Kowie had barely any set up before getting together. Seblos had none (though in fairness that was due to Disney restrictions) and Miss Jenn and Mike Bowen didn’t have much set up either. Rini did get lots of development in S1 but that’s because they had already dated and were the main ship of the show. The show’s not really about slow burns, if Jenzzara canons in the finale they’ll count and if Rina ever got together they’d also count but neither of those ships have gotten consistent development with Mazzara not being in several eps and Gina and Ricky not even interacting for the past 3 eps. 

Is Portwell a slowburn? In a sense since they did feature quite a bit in each other’s S1 plot lines and even had a fake dating plot but it is true that they were platonic and not that close in S1 so it’s a wash. There was clear set up for romantic Portwell in 1x10 with team wonderstudies and Gina staring at EJ (which interestingly enough looked more like set up for Gina to pine over EJ). I think the main problem is that even though we saw Gina and EJ hanging out in the background we didn’t get any scenes of substance between them until 2x05. It was a mistake and there should have been some scene, like EJ and Gina commiserating in 2x03 over being single on Valentine’s Day or something like that. Hell there was even that still from 2x01 of EJ and Gina looking at each other at the piano while they were in the frame between Ricky and Nini singing and having a moment  which would have been good foreshadowing but that shot wasn’t in the ep.

Whether Tim just really wanted Portwell to be a surprise in 2x05 as a mid-season twist to throw the audience off of what looked like a Rini/Rina triangle or he was unsure as to whether he wanted to go with Portwell or if he just planned it out poorly we may never know. Regardless they’ve had great writing for 4 eps in a row now which puts them slightly ahead of the 3 eps in a row of development Rina got in S1. I’m sure if someone added up their screen time they’d find that Portwell has more screen time this season than Kowie and more screen time than Redlyn or Seblos  got in S1. 

Caswell cousins was fun and Ashlyn did in fact paint EJ’s nails. 

Set up for Seblos drama next week, it’s refreshing to see Seb being jealous over Carlos flirting with other boys that’s definitely not something you see on Disney shows.

Ricky got some healing done with his mom. Enough to cover their issues? No but this is probably the best this show is capable of. There was a brief mention of therapy sandwiched between other options which sounds more like checking off a box then setting up Ricky actually going to therapy. I noticed Lynne was smiling at odd times like when she told Ricky she knew about his breakup with Nini; whether that was poor directing or acting I don’t know. Who knows if we’ll see Lynne again. As an aside still so wild that Tim named Lynne who’s been a kinda shitty mom after his own mom who he seems to be fairly close with.

Really liked You ain’t seen nothin as a song but not a fan of the Tiktok style vid. I’ll level with you wildcats, I’m too old to really get Tiktok, it just seems like a crappy version of Vine to me. Let you go was good, seemed better fitted for Joshua Bassett’s voice than some of his previous songs. A big sign that they’re not circling back to Rini for a long time for sure. Though on that note we got a bit of a hint that Ricky was Nini’s muse which may one day come back as a way to help bring them back together. 

Looking Ahead:

If there’s only 3 weeks left till the Menkies, with only 2 weeks left for rehearsal due to spring break, it’s hard to see East High winning unless North High is disqualified or has to withdraw. 

Lily is in a promo photo so she’s likely the unexpected facetime Ricky gets which is what I had theorized. Also makes it much more likely that she’s the party crasher Ricky re-evaluates in the finale though what Tim actually wants to do with those two I do not know.

There’s little point in bringing back the Valentine’s chocolate since there’s no real stakes. Rini are already broken up, Gina hasn’t spoken to Ricky since 2x06, and it’s not like Nini and Gina were ever close so even if they stopped talking to each other it wouldn’t really affect the show in any way. 

Seems pretty likely that Second Chances refers to Gina realizing that her first try with Ricky failed but her second chance with EJ won’t and that leads to her sharing her truth and cue the Portwell confession and kiss, perhaps with an assist on EJ’s end from Mazzara. We’ve gone well past the point where Portwell can be brushed off as just a plot device to help Rina but Tim is playing with fire by getting the audience so on board with Portwell if he’s once again going to have EJ lose a girl he likes to Ricky in S3.

Gina certainly needs to talk with Ricky and I do think that happens in ep 11 or 12 and leaves them on better terms. As I mentioned last week, if Tim was smart he’d slam the door on Rina if he’s going with canon Portwell or vice versa. If he wants Rina to be a slow burn he’s really botched the writing this season, it’s been too one sided and too angsty to sustain any kind of momentum or audience interest. They haven’t even interacted for 3 eps now and not only has it not affected the show but it’s inarguably made Gina’s story line much better.  Again I don’t think he’s smart enough to not try and do Portwell and then later Rina but he’s accidentally set up the Rina story line to quite easily slam the door permanently on them by having their conversation be closure for Gina who’s moved on and an apology from Ricky who never liked her back as much as Gina liked him.

Not looking forward to seeing Nini basically live out Olivia Rodrigo’s life in future seasons

Curious to see Carlos’ apology song to Seb. Ricky helping him with it is a great way to help start redeeming Ricky’s character in the audiences eye’s. According to Matt there is a bit of a Ricky/EJ rivalry this season and if it’s really happening the sleepover would be a good place to do it though I hope it’s not about Gina. 

Until next week wildcats.

[kpop-zone]

Twice reaction to slapping their s/o

Nervously, you leaned to the side to be able to look past the driver at the dashboard clock.

2:47

“Shit...Can you drive a little faster please?”

You asked the driver panicked who gave you a look of commiseration through the rearview mirror.

“I’m sorry, I’d love to but I’m already driving as fast as I can.”

He replied apologetically and you forced a smile to thank him for his effort. You were tempted to offer him some money to make him rethink his reply, but then you figured that you had already messed up enough for one night. You couldn’t afford to get in trouble with him or the police. The only thing that was left to do now was to pray. Pray that your girlfriend had already fallen asleep and hadn’t noticed that you were missing for nearly five hours without any sign of life. You had left your apartment around 6pm to “grab a quick drink” with a few friends, but then one thing had led to the other and now it was almost 3am although you had told your girlfriend that you would be home no later than 10pm. The time had just flown by without you noticing and when you figured that you could sent your girlfriend a sign of life at last, you had realized that your phone was dead. You were sure that she had probably tried to reach you a million times already to no avail and was close to calling the police right now. You just needed to get home as fast as possible.

As soon as the driver pulled up to the building, you threw some bills to the front before bolting out of the car, not caring that you had probably just given him a tip of ₩50,000. The only thought that was left in your brain was to free your girlfriend from the anxiety that she was probably feeling right now. By the time you reached the front door, your lungs were slightly burning and you were panting like you had just run a marathon, but you didn’t give yourself time to catch your breath before quietly unlocking the door, just in case your girlfriend was asleep already. As soon as the door swung open though you could see that the light was still on in the living room and you knew that she must have been waiting for you.

Your suspicion was proven to be right when you heard loud footsteps nearing the door, causing you to mentally prepare yourself for a good scolding. But nothing could have prepared you for what was about to come. As soon as your girlfriend stepped into your field of vision, you could see that she was more than just angry. Her eyes seemed to be spitting fire and you gulped intimidated. Automatically, your mouth opened in an attempt to calm her down with an apology but before you even had the chance to utter a single word, you could suddenly feel your head being whipped to the side due to a painful force. Dumbfounded, you touched your cheek and looked at your girlfriend. That had been unexpected...

Nayeon

Perplexed, Nayeon stared at her own hand, not having expected herself to slap you. But she had just been so angry when she saw you standing in the door, being totally fine. How could you have consciously put her through so much agony? Torn between feeling guilty and angry, Nayeon stood in front of you, opening and closing her mouth without making a sound, not knowing whether she should apologize or scold you for your reckless behavior. When she looked into your eyes that were filled with utter disbelief though, she automatically reached out to touch your arm.

“I’m sorry.”

Nayeon mumbled ashamed, feeling how a blush rose to her cheeks.

“But do you know how worried I was?? Why didn’t you just send me a text?”

She added, not being able to fully spare you the accusations.

“I know that I’ve messed up. Time just flew by and I didn’t notice that my battery had died...”

You answered sheepishly while showing her the black screen of your phone, causing Nayeon to sigh.

“I swear to god, Y/N, if you scare me like that one more time...”

She threateningly put her hands on her hips and stared you down until you lowered your head bashfully. Her own guilt, however, forbade her to make you feel bad any longer. It seemed like both of you had simply allowed your emotions to get the better of you tonight. Hesitantly, Nayeon took a step closer to you, causing you to look at her. Carefully, she cupped your cheek and stroked it apologetically.

“Does it hurt?”

She asked with her voice dripping with regret.

“A little...”

You admitted and Nayeon immediately grabbed your hand to pull you to the kitchen. After asking you to sit down on the kitchen counter, she pulled out a bag of frozen peas from the fridge and gently pressed it against your cheek while standing between your legs. Fueled by her bad conscience, her hands didn’t stop caressing your skin; not even for a second.

Tonight, both of you had probably learned a lesson that you would never forget...

Jeongyeon

“Do you know what cellphones are for?? I was about to call the police!”

Jeongyeon yelled at you, blinded by her rage that had replaced the immense worry that had tortured her the past five hours the moment she had seen you standing at the door completely unharmed. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly, and she had to suppress the urge to rip your head off. Never had she ever been so scared before. The voices in her head had told her over and over again that you had been kidnapped or hit by a car. If you had needed one more minute to come home, she had probably completely lost it.

“I-I... lost track of time.”

You stuttered dumbfounded while rubbing your cheek. Only now Jeongyeon realized what she had done, and she exhaled shakily, feeling how her anger slowly left her body.

“So, nothing bad happened?”

Jeongyeon reassured herself and you shook your head sheepishly, causing her to feel relieved, but also disappointed by your selfishness at the same time.

Awkward silence settled between the two of you while Jeongyeon tried to get a clear head again. Slowly her heartbeat reached a normal rhythm again and the uncomfortable feeling of regret formed in her stomach. Hadn’t she overreacted a bit? Shyly, she looked at you but you barely dared to meet her eyes, causing her heart to ache. Her bad conscience had finally caught up to her, leaving her with nothing but an urge to make it up to you.

“Come here...”

Jeongyeon mumbled before nodding her head towards the kitchen. Hesitantly, you followed her and sat down at the kitchen table, waiting for her to give you an ice pack. While you cooled your cheek, Jeongyeon awkwardly stood beside you, knowing that she had to apologize to you, but also feeling too proud to do so after what you had put her through tonight. Somehow she still needed to make you feel better though...

“Are you hungry?”

Jeongyeon asked, hoping that you would understand her without words.

Momo

Perplexed, you looked at Momo who simply stared at you without uttering a single word. Her face was almost blank, making you wonder what was happening in her head right now. You, for your part, were too speechless to apologize. Had she really slapped you? You were aware that you had upset her tonight, but you would have never thought that Momo would ever physically hurt you. Instead of giving you an answer to the thousand questions that were racing through your head though, your girlfriend suddenly turned around and walked away, leaving you behind with an open mouth. What a great way to resolve a conflict...

After squandering away at least half an hour in the living room in order to avoid another awkward encounter with your girlfriend, you eventually followed her to the bedroom. To your surprise, the lights were still on in the room and Momo was leaning against the headboard with her arms crossed while staring ahead vacantly. Unsure you lingered at the door for a bit before shuffling to your side of the bed. Several minutes passed in which neither of you spoke. Eventually, however, Momo’s voice cut through the heavy silence, causing you to flinch slightly.

“Why didn’t you answer my calls?”

She asked, the disappointment in her voice being unmistakable.

“My phone battery died...”

You mumbled sheepishly before painful silence surrounded the two of you again. You were about to flee the scene, unable to bear the tension any longer, when Momo finally decided to end your torture.

“I-I didn’t mean to slap you.”

She stuttered almost too silent to be heard and when you turned to look at her, you saw that she was hanging her head bashfully. Automatically, your hand reached over to grab hers, causing her to look at you.

“I know.”

You smiled slightly and Momo exhaled relieved.

“I’m sorry.”

Both of you said at the same time and you giggled sheepishly. There were still a few things unresolved, but at least you had finally managed to cut through the tension...

Sana

Frozen you stared ahead while trying to find an explanation for your stinging cheek other than that your girlfriend had just slapped you. This was Sana after all...the most loving person that you had ever met. Your frozen state, however, was suddenly disrupted by the hysterical voice of the person that had left you speechless in the first place and you shook off your trance to be able to focus on her.

“Where were you?? I was so worried, I thought someone had raided you and you wandering around the city hurt...”

Sana sobbed and only now you realized the miserable condition that she was in. Her hair was completely disheveled, and her face was puffy as if she had cried for five hours straight.

“You said you wouldn’t come home late! Why didn’t you let me know where you were?”

She continued although it was hard to make out her words between her sobs. Not being able to stand seeing her this way, you quickly took a step forward and wrapped your arms around her body. Sana buried her head in the crook of your neck without hesitation and started soaking your shirt with her tears while you tried to calm her with a thousand apologies. It needed a while till Sana’s uncontrollable sobbing turned into light sniffling, but eventually she loosened her tight grip around your waist and leaned back to look at you. Her gaze immediately zeroed in on your cheek and she reached out to stroke it gently.

“I’m sorry.”

Sana mumbled bashfully after examining your cheek and wincing when she noticed a red mark.

“I’m sorry...I’m sorry...I’m sorry.”

She kept on whispering while placing a kiss on your burning skin between every apology.

How could you stay mad at that?

Jihyo

“Do you know what time it is?”

Jihyo yelled at you, not caring about the neighbors that could probably hear her.

“I have no problem with you going out, but would it have been so hard to send me a text telling me that you’re late??”

She continued, needing to vent the immense anger that was seething inside of her. If she hated one thing, it was unreliability. You could pull an all-nighter for all that she cared, but she would want to know that beforehand. Because without a heads-up, she had worried the whole night and hadn’t been able to sleep a singly second although she had an exhausting schedule ahead of her.

“I didn’t think it was this late already...”

You mumbled sheepishly, causing Jihyo to scoff in disbelief. How delightful to hear that you seemed to have had fun... Without giving you the chance to justify yourself further, she simply turned on her heel and stormed to your shared bedroom. The anger inside of her was still seething, so she threw herself on the bed and buried herself under her blanket. It didn’t take long till she heard you laying down beside her and she huffed in annoyance. How could you have been so selfish? Usually you always informed her about everything. Which was probably the reason for her anxiety tonight. She had just assumed that something bad must have happened to you if you didn’t reach out to her.

The longer Jihyo thought about the events of the night, the more restless she felt. Even when she didn’t have to worry anymore now, countless other thoughts were still making her brain work at full stretch and sleep was a distant goal. Hadn’t she been too harsh with you? In hindsight, the memory of her hand colliding with your face caused her to wince and she tossed and turned for hours. If you would slap her every time that she didn’t pick up her phone, she would probably permanentely walk around with a swollen face. How could she have punished you for a misdeed that she committed almost every week? Oh how she hated when her temperament got the better of her...

She definitely needed to sort things out with you tomorrow.

Mina

For a second, Mina’s own action caused her to be speechless. It had been a while since she had lost control like that. If she was honest, Mina couldn’t remember a time that she had ever used violence to express her emotions. But what was done, was done. It was too late to backtrack now, so she decided to stick to the route that she had chosen.

“Do you know how worried I was?”

She asked calmly while putting her hands on her hips and staring you down.

“I didn’t mean to worry you...”

You tried to justify yourself, causing Mina to chuckle coldly.

“That’s good to know, because as I see it, I worried about you all night while you didn’t even waste a single thought on me.”

She replied, not knowing whether she was trying to make you feel guilty about your behavior or to make herself feel less guilty for slapping you.

“I...It’s not like that.”

You stuttered helplessly, proving to Mina that her strategy was working. If she wouldn’t feel so bad herself right now, she would probably enjoy seeing your bad conscience nagging on you. But under these circumstances, she just wanted the night to end as quickly as possible and to just forget about it. Therefore, she simply turned on her heel and walked towards the bedroom.

“Don’t scare me like that ever again...”

Mina said over her shoulder shortly before disappearing out of the room, not being able to leave this conflict completely unresolved.

Hopefully you could leave this night behind in the morning. She didn’t know if she could even bear to look at you if you ever brought it up again...

Dahyun

“Whoa, Y/N, I don’t know why I did that.”

Dahyun gasped before slamming her hand on her mouth in shock.

“D-did you just slap me?”

You replied dumfounded and Dahyun nodded hesitantly.

“I think I did. Oh my gosh...why did I do that?”

She still couldn’t believe that she had allowed her anger to get the better of her and she simply stared at you in disbelief. Eventually her shock died down, leaving behind nothing but a feeling of shame.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I was just so angry and caught up in the moment. Of course that’s not an excuse, but I guess that’s why I...slapped you.”

It was still hard for Dahyun to say out loud what she had done. Although she understood the reasoning behind her actions, she could not believe that she would ever turn to such methods.

“And I’m sorry for worrying you. I didn’t mean to vanish off the face of the earth like that.”

You replied sheepishly and Dahyun hummed understandingly.

“Yeah, I know that you probably meant no harm.”

She knew that she could not expect you to give her the benefit of the doubt while not cutting you some slack for your mistake at the same time. It was clear that both of you had done some things tonight that you would gladly make undone. Unfortunately, there was no button to rewind though and you needed to find another way to sort things out between the two of you.

“Let’s talk?”

Dahyun proposed while pointing towards the couch and you nodded in agreement.

Why couldn’t she have acted like this from the start?

Chaeyoung

Dumbfounded, you looked at Chaeyoung, hoping that she would be able to make more sense out of this situation than you could, but for some reason, she looked even more taken by surprise than you.

“What was that?”

You asked confused and Chaeyoung shook her head.

“I have absolutely no idea.”

She replied absentmindedly, looking like she was doubting her whole existence right now. Eventually, she snapped out of her trance and scanned you worriedly.

“Are you ok?”

Chaeyoung asked and you instinctively touched your cheek again. It was still stinging a bit, but if you were honest, you were more shocked than hurt right now. You would have never expected that she would hurt you.

“Yeah, I’m fine...”

You answered brusquely, but your girlfriend immediately picked up on your upset.

“No you’re not and that’s ok. I don’t really know how to make you feel better though... I’m sorry and I promise that I will never do it again, but I know that this doesn’t really fix things.”

Chaeyoung said pensively, sounding like she was incredibly disappointed in herself.

“It’s ok. Let’s just go to bed and talk tomorrow about it when we both have a clear head again.”

You proposed, trying to find a solution to this awkward situation.

“Of course, whatever you want.”

Your girlfriend immediately agreed, but you could see that something was still bothering her.

“Do you want me to sleep on the couch?”

She added conscience-stricken and you thought about her offer for a second before shaking your head. Judging by the look on her face, she was probably already punishing herself more than enough. There was no need for you to resort to any drastic punishments as well.

“No, you need your sleep. You have to get up in a few hours.”

You replied with a slight smile playing on your lips while pointing at the clock on the wall.

For some reason you already knew though that your girlfriend would probably not be getting much sleep tonight anyways, no matter whether she would sleep on the couch or in your bed...

Tzuyu

If the current situation weren’t so serious, you would probably laugh at Tzuyu’s puzzled expression. She was staring at you with wide eyes and her mouth almost formed a perfect circle. Both of you seemed to be waiting for the other one to break the silence, but neither of you seemed to know what to say.

“Y/N...”

Tzuyu eventually made the first step, but her voice gave in before she could utter a complete sentence. Instead, she started to fidget with her fingers and chose to look at the floor. Therefore, you decided to try voicing your feelings.

“Why did you do that? I don’t know you like this...”

You asked and your girlfriend finally met your eyes again.

“I-I don’t know. I wasn’t really thinking clearly.”

She furrowed her brow as if your question was painfully martyring her brain. Nothing was left of the fury from before anymore and she looked like your considerate girlfriend again, making you wonder whether the slap had just been a fever dream. But the weird distance that was gaping between the two of you told a different story. The unfamiliarity of this situation was unbearable, and you hesitantly took a step forward to get closer to your usual source of comfort. But instead of closing the distance, Tzuyu walked backwards to increase the distance between the two of you again. In defeat, you sighed and decided to give your girlfriend the space that she was apparently seeking.

“Let’s go to bed?”

You asked and Tzuyu silently nodded in response.

Without wasting your time on another attempt to get close to her, you walked to your bedroom and got ready for bed. Your girlfriend, however, took her time to follow you. Only when you were already slipping under the covers, Tzuyu finally entered the room. For a moment she looked at you as if she wanted to say something but didn’t know the right words. Patiently you held her gaze, but eventually your girlfriend simply sighed and shuffled to her side of the bed. She laid down all the way at the edge and turned her back to you, making it clear to you that she wasn’t interested in talking. Therefore, you reluctantly turned off the bedside lamp and tried to curl up in a comfortable position. Yet, the unsettled conflict between the two of you didn’t let you rest peacefully. You tossed and turned for what seemed like hours until the voice of your girlfriend caused you to almost jump out of bed in surprise.

“I don’t know why I did what I did, but I will find out and make sure that it will never happen again. I promise.”

She said determined, making you realize that she had probably not been able to sleep any more than you. Somehow the determination of her words gave you the comfort that you had been seeking though and you felt how the tension of the conflict finally left your body. You knew that your girlfriend would keep her word.

[extasiswings]

How we feeling clowns?  Wrecked?  Anyway, here, have an episode tag for both the crossover and Buck Begins.  Also on ao3.

Eddie’s driving nearly on autopilot, the roads familiar as they get closer and closer to El Paso. Part of him almost wishes he hadn’t taken the driving shift to get them to his childhood home, even if it made the most sense—he can feel the tension in his jaw and shoulders creeping in, curling tighter with every mile they come closer, and his fingers itch for his phone, for the commiserating sympathies of his sisters who understand what he’s likely to walk into much more than Buck or Hen. 

Technically they could have skipped the detour. Eddie hadn’t even planned on telling his parents he was coming to Texas at all—it was Christopher who let it slip, and then Eddie had been immediately put on the spot and he hadn’t been able to come up with a good way out of stopping by after his weak deflection that it wasn’t a social trip was met with well, you have to stop and eat somewhere, don’t you. 

Sophia told him to lie and say the department said no. But she’s always been much better at lying to their parents outright than he is. Adriana shrugged and said if he didn’t want to go he didn’t need to give them a reason and should just say he wouldn’t be coming. But then, that’s her tactic as well and always has been—putting her foot down to establish hard boundaries, forging her own path and bucking all expectations.  Eddie’s always fallen somewhere in the middle, which he supposes is fitting—struggling to set boundaries, often getting there only when pushed, wanting approval but lacking Sophia’s talent for gentle manipulation that usually leads people to think that whatever she wants was their idea. 

So. Here he sits. Driving to El Paso. 

“Eddie?”

He blinks and clears his throat as he registers Buck’s voice, the edge of concern that says it’s not the first time Buck has called his name. 

“Yeah?”

“I was going to ask if you could pass back the aux cord,” Buck says. “But now I think I should ask if you’re okay.”

Eddie glances over his shoulder—Hen is in the back of the truck, head pillowed against the window, dozing with her eyes closed.  He swallows. 

“It’s been awhile since I’ve seen my parents is all,” he replies. “And usually when they call it’s to talk to Christopher so...it might be uncomfortable.”

Buck’s voice drops. “Have you talked to them since the thing? Other than about this I guess.”

The Thing, also known as the huge fight they got into when Eddie decided that if he was going to keep working he couldn’t live at home for awhile and they tried to once again insist that he take Chris back to live with them. Like some terrible combination of the arguments they had before he moved to LA and after Shannon’s funeral, only even worse because Eddie had been raw enough over the decision to move in with Buck and let his abuela take care of Chris for awhile and really didn’t need to hear anyone tell him that choice made him a bad parent—

Sophia had been spitting mad when he told her and while he doesn’t know what she said in her own subsequent call to their parents, he knows that the next time they called him, the subject didn’t come up again.  Which, he supposes is as close to an apology as he’s ever likely to get.  

He probably could have used that as an excuse to not visit.  But then, that’s not really how they are.  Don’t apologize, pretend you don’t hold grudges, act like everything is fine, and repress until it feels like it is—the Diaz family way.  

Eddie sighs as he focuses on the road.

“Not really,” he replies.  “They’ve called Christopher every few weeks, but we’ve only talked directly...three times maybe since then?  Things seem to go south more quickly when we’re in person though so I guess I’m…”

“Bracing for impact,” Buck fills in quietly.  “I get that.”

“Yeah?”

Buck shrugs.  “I don’t talk about my parents,” he points out.  “Don’t talk to them either if I can avoid it because they always have a way of managing to just—anyway.  The last time I even called was after everything with Maddie and Doug.  Haven’t seen them since...since before I started with the 118 at least. So.  Yeah.  I get it.”

He hesitates, then adds, “You know I have your back, right?  You’re my best friend and you’re an amazing father.  I’m not going to let anybody get away with talking badly about you in front of me, even if they are your parents.”

Eddie glances back and manages a faint smile, some of the tension leaving his shoulders.  

“I’m glad you’re here,” he admits.  “Even if you did try to steal a fire truck in the middle of the night without me.”

Buck laughs and shoves at his shoulder.  “At least it wasn’t this truck.  Besides—you caught up before I did it anyway.”    

“Yeah, my Buck’s about to do something dangerous senses were tingling, couldn’t let that slide,” Eddie teases.

“Just give me the damn aux cord,” Buck shoots back, but he’s grinning.

And as they pass the next exit, Eddie feels like maybe things won’t be quite so bad.

***

Buck hates Eddie’s parents.  

It’s not the most charitable thing to think about someone you’ve only just officially met—he saw them at the ceremony when Eddie passed his probationary period, but he’d been on pretty strong painkillers at the time and Maddie had shuffled him back home as soon as possible—but he really does.

He hates the tense, anxious set of Eddie’s shoulders, hates the way his smile looks forced—it triggers the same fierce, protective instinct that rears its head whenever he gets between his parents and Maddie, and, well, he did promise, so—

He really doesn’t feel bad for interrupting the very first digs about how seeing Christopher over video isn’t the same as in person, but it’s nice to have the option and technology really is wonderful, Zoom calls must have been a great improvement from your army days, right son with—

“You know, it is wonderful isn’t it?  Did Eddie tell you how amazing Christopher is handling hybrid learning?  It’s really so great how his teachers have adapted, I can’t imagine he would have kept up so well anywhere else.”

Buck smiles brightly as Eddie’s mother’s lips thin.  Hen coughs and takes a long sip of lemonade.  Eddie blinks in surprise from across the table and clears his throat, grasping at the lifeline.

“Yeah, top of his class,” Eddie says.  

“He even has a reading group once a week with some of the other kids in his class that Eddie started to help them stay social.  I know a lot of the other parents appreciate it,” Buck adds, and Eddie rubs at the back of his neck.

“We definitely do,” Hen says, glancing at Eddie’s father as she clarifies, “I have a son Christopher’s age.  They used to play together all the time before all of this.”

“His therapist said kids are resilient, but I wanted to at least try and give him something normal,” Eddie replies, and his mother’s brows raise.

“Christopher is in therapy?”  There’s a note in her tone that makes Eddie tense and Buck’s hackles raise.

“I took him to see someone for a few sessions after Shannon died, mom,” Eddie says evenly.  After the tsunami, Buck fills in for himself.  “It didn’t seem like a bad idea to go back again to make sure he’s okay during a time that’s pretty unprecedented for just about everyone.” 

“Really, I think more parents should send their kids to therapy,” Buck interjects.  “If it’s a feasible option, I can’t see that it’s anything other than great parenting to make sure your kid has the best tools they can to take care of their mental health.”

God knows if he’d gone to therapy a hell of a lot sooner, he might not be struggling through sessions with Dr. Copeland now that he’s nearly thirty, but that’s not really the point.

“Well, some people feel those sorts of things are best taken care of within the family,” Eddie’s mother replies.

“With all due respect, sometimes the family’s way of handling problems just makes things worse,” Buck replies, his smile dropping briefly before he forces it back again.

“This lemonade really is delicious, Mrs. Diaz,” Hen jumps in as Eddie pushes his chair back and starts collecting empty plates.  “I would love to get the recipe before we leave.  If you don’t mind.” 

Startled, the older woman blinks.  “Oh.  Yes, of course.  I’ll write it down for you.”

Buck pushes back his own chair as Hen continues redirecting the conversation and follows Eddie into the kitchen where he finds his best friend gripping the edge of the sink.

“Hey,” he says quietly.  

Eddie looks over his shoulder and exhales heavily.  “Hey.”

“Sorry if I overstepped.”

“You didn’t,” Eddie assures.  “I’m just...exhausted.  And ready to get back on the road and home to my kid.”

He hesitates, then adds, “you know, my sisters would be impressed.  I haven’t seen someone manage our parents like that since they left.  I—thank you.”

“I meant what I said in the truck, Eddie,” Buck replies.  “You’re an amazing father and a great man and—it’s not right that anyone should pretend any different.  So.  I won’t let them.”   

Eddie glances at the hallway.  “Guess we have to go back eventually.  I didn’t quite think this escape plan through.”  

“Once more unto the breach?”  Buck offers.  The smile he gives Eddie is far different from the fake one he’s had up since they arrived, and when Eddie returns it, a spark returning to his eyes, it makes Buck’s stomach flip and his pulse race.

He tries not to think too hard about that.  They still have a long drive ahead of them—plenty of time to save it for later.    

“Yeah.  Yeah, okay.”

***

When they get home, Eddie barely manages to shower and plug in his phone to charge before falling into bed and immediately going to sleep.  When he wakes up, he finally checks his messages and sees several missed calls and texts from his sisters.

So? Sophia asks.  How was it?

<em>You were right</em>, Eddie taps out, and then waits. His phone rings a few seconds later. 

“I’ll save the I told you so in favor of asking if I should get Adriana on the line for an emergency Diaz sibling parental grievance vent session or if I’ll suffice,” Sophia greets. 

“It’s not that serious,” Eddie replies. “I’m okay—a little annoyed still, but...I’m okay.”

He’s not quite sure what compels him to add, “Buck was there. He, uh, he told them off about it a little actually. Politely, but that kind of polite...you know the one.”

“The one that’s basically go fuck yourself with a smile and/or plausible deniability?” Sophia fills in, and Eddie laughs. 

“Yeah, that.” He rubs at the back of his neck and leans back in his chair. “It was—he kept pointing out things about what a great dad I am.”

There’s something about the feeling in his gut that he can’t name. Something he wants to poke at, to explore, but that also makes him wary. Like a yellow caution light—it’s not a do not enter but it’s not risk free either—and he’s not sure whether it’s a risk he can take yet. 

Sophia is quiet for a moment. Then she says, “You are a great dad, Eddie. In spite of them. I’m glad you have other people in your life who recognize that too.  You deserve that.  You deserve to trust that you’re good at things, even if mom and dad say you aren’t.  You deserve to be happy, so...”

The silence that follows feels weighty.  

“What?”  Eddie asks.

“Is Buck—?”  Sophia cuts herself off.  “—nevermind.  Hey, the twins are calling, so I’ll call back again later, okay?  Love you.”

Is Buck what? Eddie wants to ask.  But he swallows it back.

“Love you, too,” he says instead.  “Talk to you later.”

As he hangs up and tosses his phone aside, his mind wanders back to that feeling.  Right up to the edge of warning lights and caution tape.  And Eddie wonders for a moment if he should—

There’s a knock at his door.  

“Dad?  You awake?”

“Yeah, buddy,” he calls back.  “Be right there.”

Later.  He can think about it later.  

***

Eddie figures it out at the worst possible time—in the middle of a five-alarm fire when Buck’s trapped inside and he doesn’t know if—

What do you do when you realize you might be in love with your best friend and they could die?

“We have to go back in there,” he says, before he can think of any reason why he shouldn’t.  “We can’t just leave him, we have to—”

“You’re right,” Bobby interrupts, and the other captain makes a noise of frustration.  

“Captain Nash—”

“You’re right,” Bobby repeats, holding Eddie’s gaze.  “We���re going to get him back.”

Maybe it’s stupid, four trained firefighters diving back into an active blaze in an unstable building with unclear direction, but Eddie can’t regret it when he sees the desperation on Buck’s face.  The relief.  The impending breakdown.

After, he’s assigned to take care of the victim and Buck’s carted off to the hospital to get checked, and Eddie thinks maybe that’s better.  It gives him time, at least.  Time to figure out what to say, what to do, whether he should say or do anything at all.  Part of him doesn’t know.  The rest is screaming I love him, I love him, I love him, wants to get his hands on Buck to verify for himself that he’s fine.  That he’s alive.  That he’s going to stay that way.

But when he gets back to the station, Buck’s parents are there, sitting at the table, and Eddie just—

He thinks about the look on Buck’s face earlier in the shift when he spilled everything, when he explained how he was apparently born just for parts and how he used to throw himself into bad situations because it was the only way to get their attention.

He could ignore them.  But he doesn’t.

“He saved my son, you know,” Eddie says, gripping the top of the staircase as the Buckleys look up.  And it’s probably somewhat insane to keep talking because he knows they don’t even know who he is, but he can’t help it because he just needs them to understand—  “Buck.  He wasn’t even working at the time, he was on medical leave and didn’t know if he would ever be able to be a firefighter again.  But he saved my son in the middle of a tsunami—my then eight-year-old son, and god knows I can’t imagine losing him, I think that would be the worst thing I could possibly go through, and I’m not sure I would survive it, but I didn’t have to because Buck saved him.  And probably twenty other people as well.  That’s just the kind of person he is.  The kind who saves people.”

They don’t say a word, so he keeps going.  “He could have died today.  Because he didn’t want to leave anyone behind.  Because he is a good man, even if he doesn’t ever feel like he’s good enough.  And he hasn’t said a lot about you, but he’s said enough for me to know that while he’s gotten the latter impression from you, he learned the former himself.  He built his life here himself.  So...I don’t know why you’re here, if you want to explain yourselves or just want him to forgive you because you feel guilty, but I just wanted you to know that.  That he’s a good man.  The best man that I know.  And if you’re proud of him for that, he deserves to hear it.  That’s all.”

Eddie walks away then, heart beating too fast, blood rushing in his ears.  

The best man that I know.  And I’m in love with him.

That wasn’t for their ears though.  

It thrums in his veins, the words caught in his throat as he showers, changes, waits for Buck to return to the station.  And when he does, Eddie almost—

But something stops him.  

“You have visitors,” he says instead.  And leaves Buck to it.

Buck finds him in the locker room after.

“So, my parents said they heard stories about me while they were waiting,” he says.  “When I asked them who from, they said they didn’t know, but that I saved their son in a tsunami—and trust me, that got a hell of a lot of questions.”      

Eddie is grateful for the open locker, the excuse to hide his face as he pulls out his street clothes.

“Yeah, well—just because they’re not going to appreciate you doesn’t mean that nobody else does.”

“Eddie.”

Eddie pulls back and takes a breath before looking over at Buck.  There’s a look in Buck’s eyes like he’s trying to piece Eddie together like a puzzle, to work out all the things he hasn’t said.  And Eddie suddenly feels exposed, far more than he had when Buck was sitting in his childhood dining room staring down his own parents.  

“You’re a good man,” Eddie says quietly.  “They should hear that.  And...someone should be willing to defend it.”  

Buck’s quiet for a moment.

“I have to go see Maddie,” he says finally.  “But maybe I could come by later?  And we could...talk?”

“You don’t have to ask, Buck,” Eddie replies.  “You know I—”  I always want you.  “—you’re always welcome.”

Buck watches him in silence for another long moment, then nods.  “Okay.  Okay, I’ll see you later then.”

It’s hours before there’s a knock on the door.  Hours in which Eddie burns dinner and then orders takeout because he’s too busy thinking, hours that he spends trapped in his own head, thinking through all the worst case scenarios, through every what if of how things could go wrong.

But also how they could go right.

And by the time he opens the door, he’s almost ready to just let the words trip off his tongue, but before he can, Buck says—

“Please don’t tell me I’m wrong about this.”

—and kisses him.

Eddie freezes, but before Buck can pull back, he slides a hand around the back of Buck’s neck and kisses him back with everything in him—every bit of thank god you’re alive and I was so afraid and I can’t lose you that he can muster.  By the time Buck pulls away, they’re both breathless. 

“I’m in love with you,” Buck admits.  “I’ve been—”

“Me too,” Eddie replies.  “I thought—I thought you were—”

Buck kisses him again.

“I can’t believe you told off my parents.”

“Well, you told off mine, so—”

Eddie pulls Buck through the door.

“Chris is in his room,” he says quietly.  “But...you should stay for dinner.  And…”

You should stay.  Just stay.

Buck does.  

[constitutionalweasleymonarchy]

ANDY: Sunday

From the flash fic collection Days That End In Y

prompt: fireworks

(This ficlet also submitted for @perceptual-prompts open prompt challenge - prompt card #3 lyrics "one of those nights when you feel the fire is burning." Apologies for submitting early for this prompt card - I'm also on this chronological posting schedule for my overall 30 days of Percy fluff!)

.

On the scale of how Percy would enjoy spending his time, a New Year’s celebration fell somewhere between sorting out an extreme doxy infestation and testing some of George’s products in development.

It was an inherently awkward holiday if you weren’t partnered off, even if you weren’t otherwise bothered about that. Not that Percy was exactly swimming in invitations — but even spending it with family could be tedious. And forget absolutely anything to do with being anywhere near a pub.

So as London sparked with revelry, Percy checked his letterbox in the foyer of his building (for appearances, and to throw out junk mail). Two women cackled and clambered down the stairs on high heels, and Percy returned their holiday greeting absently, flipping through the post — all adverts — and tossing it in the bin. The ladies continued outside, exchanging flirtatious commentary with someone else, and when Percy heard the voice that replied he glanced up again.

It was his upstairs neighbour Andy, making his way inside with two bulging bags of shopping in his arms.

“Alright?” Andy greeted Percy when he saw him there. His cheeks were pink from the cold and his knitted cap a bit askew as he balanced his shopping and caught his breath.

“Alright. Can I help you with that?”

“Thanks.” Andy allowed Percy to take half his burden as they made their way upstairs.

Halfway up, Andy glanced referentially over Percy’s attire — joggers and a pullover.

“No plans for New Year?” he guessed.

“Nah.” Percy didn’t elaborate. “You?”

Andy shook his head. “I was meant to go to a big do, but I split up with someone a few weeks ago and didn’t really care to find new plans, you know?”

“Seems to be going around,” said Percy by way of neutral but personable response — even though it had been several months now since he’d split up with Cecily.

“Cheers, thanks,” said Andy when they’d reached the top floor and he’d unlocked his door. Percy handed over his shopping, wished him Happy New Year, and headed back to his own flat.

Not twenty minutes later, Percy heard a knock at his door. On the other side was Andy, rocking back a bit on his heels, his hands tucked halfway into the pockets of fitted trousers.

“Hey.” Andy ran a hand across the back of his neck before gesturing over his shoulder with his thumb. “Look, I was just gonna put a pizza in and watch the BBC. If you want to…” He shrugged.

It seemed innocuous enough, and Andy seemed nice enough, and it wasn’t as though Percy was opposed to making friends, and anyway it would be a bit rude to refuse, wouldn’t it?, and it wasn’t as though he had anything else to — 

“All right,” he decided. He glanced down at himself, adding, “Should probably change, I suppose.”

“Not too fussed about it, mate. Dress code’s casual.”

“Right.”

The last few hours of Percy’s twenty-fifth New Year’s Eve were full of pizza (which did not set off any fire alarms) and beer and surprisingly easy conversation. Andy, it turned out, had three brothers, and commiserating on that topic alone could have fueled Percy for hours (or years).

Andy loved to talk — not in the way that Percy did, but the way some people have of cracking on about the smallest of things; unflaggingly cheery in a way that might become tiresome after a while but which was quite diverting in the moment.

Andy also got a bit giggly when he was tipsy, which was… adorable, frankly. Percy had never in his life applied that word to another man, but there it was, and Percy would have to sort out whatever the hell that was about later.

For now he kept watching Andy’s hands — gesturing as he talked, peeling the label off his beer bottle, resting carelessly at the end of an outstretched arm along the back of the sofa where they were sat; toned biceps flexing against the sleeves of his shirt. And when Andy clapped Percy on the shoulder as he got up to fetch another round, it sent a jolt straight down the centre of Percy’s body.

He tried not to think too much about it, but it was impossible in the hush that befell them at 11.59 — the air so thick you could get stuck in it; could do nothing but exchange flimsy smiles every so often as you waited for this moment in which you were not participating to pass.

The south-facing window was open a bit and it seemed Percy could hear the entire city counting down, and whilst the view was impeded, at midnight he could still see the glow of fireworks over the Thames.

“Happy New Year, hey?” he offered companionably as the streets outside erupted in shouts and cheers and song.

“Yeah.”

Andy’s hazel eyes met his brown and then they both looked away. Percy was sat very still, but he bit the inside of his lip, puffed up one cheek with air, concentrated on releasing it with a near-silent pop, because he needed to do something or else he’d — 

“Fuck it,” they blurted out in unison, turning and snapping together like magnets — an artless meeting of lips at first, but not an ounce of hesitation in the embrace.

They stopped, breathless, pulled apart just enough to lock eyes again.

Percy hardly knew what to make of this; could hardly name his own feelings. But he also couldn’t hear the fireworks over the sound of his own heartbeat, and Andy was warm and solid, and really it was impossible to think under these conditions.

It was Percy who came back in for more, and Andy who let him, sighing into one another as the world sang and cheered the new year. They did not break away until long after the fireworks had stopped exploding; the neon glow fading over the Thames but still burning in his cheeks under the inferno of Andy’s hands.

[amiechuchu]

Magic, Mayhem, and All Things In Between

Chapter 3: Background of the Study

[A/N: finally some y/n and loki development. soft loki moments. i am once again back with the self-indulgent fic and i hope you enjoy :’)]

other chapters can be found here

Weeks had passed since you had accepted Mr. Stark’s small favor. Weeks had passed since you began spending the majority of your time with the Asgardian brothers and dear Uncle Bruce. Though the days were filled with chatter, the late nights in the lab were quite the opposite. With only the low hum of machines to keep you company, you realized how lonely it can be. It was unlike the times you spent in the hospital, where you’d be surrounded by fellow doctors, nurses, and patients even at the dead of night. Despite how these late night duties meshed with early mornings, dulling your own sense of time, you didn’t mind it because of the company that you had. Research work, on the other hand, was a different story. Despite your years of experience, the burnout and loneliness that accompanied research work slowly made its way to the deepest parts of your brain.

“Hey,” a voice said as a hand waved in front of you, snapping you out of the trance you were in. It was Loki. “Are you okay, pet? You look rather dead.” The God held up a cup of freshly brewed coffee and passed it on to you.

“I’m fine,” came your quick reply as you received the cup from him, your hands nudging his slightly, “thank you for the coffee by the way.” You gave Loki a weak smile before beginning to sip from the warm cup of comfort that was given to you.

The lack of reaction was unusual. How many times has Loki seen you flustered with just the tiniest forms of physical touch? Probably every single time. Confused, he grabbed a chair and set it down beside you. “Are all you Midgardians always so dishonest about what you feel?” There was that usual bite in his manner of speaking. Though, no matter how hard he tried to hide it in his cold demeanor, he could feel the concern dripping from the words he uttered; the loneliness he saw in your eyes hit too close to home. Did he get too close? Maybe showing that he cared was a mistake.

Keeping your eyes on the warm mug, you hummed in reply, refusing to answer a clear yes. Your eyes glanced up at the God beside you, longing to understand why he’d even bother. Clearly, you were oblivious to any form of care or concern Loki has shown. It wasn’t as if you had your guard up, rather you were quite unfamiliar with the intimacies of talking about your own feelings. Although the question he asked was clearly rhetorical, you still wondered: Do Asgardians not repress their own feelings to prevent them from getting distracted from things that truly matter?

Green orbs stared at yours, noticing the ever darkening bags under your eyes. “I was just concerned,” Loki began, voice softening. The God looked away and focused on the variety of glassware set up on the table adjacent to them, “it has been a while since you’ve left the laboratory. You didn’t even sneak out to the medical wing for a little breather.”

You raised an eyebrow at him in disbelief. How could he have noticed all that? How could he have cared at all? After all, you were just a lowly Midgardian, as he put it, and he was a God, a deity, someone with power and importance. “How did you-”

“It pains me that you put me on the same level as them, little doctor,” the God interjected as he faced you once more, “out of all the weeks we’ve spent in this laboratory, you really believed I wouldn’t have noticed.” He noticed the closeness of your proximity; his form inches away from yours, yet your mind was elsewhere. 

“In my defense, everyone else I’ve met in this tower described you as a narcissistic asshole and a war criminal,” you shrugged, “so, naturally, I didn't think you would care at all about my well-being.” You took a sip from your cup, and indulged in the buzz the caffeine began to give you. “But I don’t think you’re as bad as they make you out to be. They just didn’t think of the whole story. Just took out a portion of it. It was unfair - what they did to you. It felt as if you always had the short end of the stick.”

Silence. 

Now, it was your turn to shock your Asgardian companion. Being on the other end of empathy was foreign to Loki as everyone treated him quite harshly. He grew up in the shadow of Thor, the more loveable sibling, and, as much as he wanted to show off his capabilities, that he was just as worthy as Thor, Loki was left in the darkness, to wallow in promises unkept, to wallow in dreams broken, to wallow in his own great tragedy. 

Eyes feeling heavy, You turned your head towards Loki, waiting for a response; though you were a naturally perceptive person, the look on his face was filled with emotions you couldn’t make out. Was he mad? Did you say too much? That analysis was unwarranted, of course he’d be mad. Embarrassed, you looked down on your cup of coffee once more, “I apologize if I said anything out of line. There are just too many things in my mind right now. I don’t think I was able to filter my thoughts very well.”

“Pray tell, dear doctor. What are you thinking of?” Loki replied, deciding to change the course of their conversation. With brows slightly raised and his gaze set at your exhausted form, you felt the God studying you, attempting to break down the essence of what makes the little physician tick. 

Deciding to be a smartass, you replied, “like I said, many things.” You set down your cup of coffee on the table and crossed your arms. “Why do you ask, Loki? These past few weeks you’ve been awfully helpful to the point that Uncle says it’s weird and unlikely for you to do that just for a human. I appreciate it though, but I just don’t see why you should go out of your way to listen to me.”

“Your words wound me, doctor,” Loki chuckled, emerald eyes piercing yours, “can I not be concerned? I see years worth of loneliness and unfulfilled expectations in your eyes to the point that you can’t even deny it. I’m sure you understand what isolation and over independence can do.” Your eyes softened, glistening under the incandescent lights. You were cracking slowly, and the God knew this. He knew what you were seeking: comfort, validation, a shoulder to cry on. It was clear as day.

“Well, I could see all the walls you’ve built. You know everything about everybody, but barely anyone knows anything about you,” you attempted to reply proudly; however, your words were breathy, already beginning to shake. So much for an attempted bark. Embarrassed, you looked away defensively, not taking another moment under his perceptive gaze. It felt as if all the skeletons you’ve kept inside your closet were being showcased all of a sudden, and you hated every second of it. Your stomach churned as your defenses slowly came undone; it wouldn’t take a while now for you to start oversharing, possibly even crying your eyes out. His hand tenderly reached out to the edge of your chin and tilted it towards him. It was warm, soothing. Comforting.

“I could say the same to you, darling. You act as if you don’t build walls around you, yet you keep everyone else at arms reach. I know what loneliness and distrust does to people, and I also know that you shouldn’t hold yourself accountable for all these expectations.” There was a slight pang in Loki’s chest as he said all these truths. He too bore wounds invisible to the eye. He too carried scars from the past. These emotions were far too familiar to the raven-haired God much like old friends, and he was afraid that, by reading these off your face, he’d become attached somehow, mended together by a mutual understanding of each other’s pain. What would become of his plan then? His glorious purpose?

Looking up to him, you realized how small you were, how fragile, how easy it was for him to see through your façade. It was oddly nice to have someone who had a grasp on your inner demons, albeit without consent. You felt a connection in the making.

 Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to trust him.

 *

Days have passed since the God of Mischief and the doctor have shared a portion of the thoughts they hid away in the darkest parts of their head. It was needless to say that the two now had an unspoken connection, a commiseration of loneliness, self-doubt, and crushing expectations. Often, they’d find their gazes focused on one another, with smiles shared and laughter exchanged. Other times, a helping hand would linger longer than usual atop the other’s. A gentle squeeze or the light encircling of one’s thumb, a sign of care and concern; these gestures only happened when the two were alone, knowing that dear Uncle Bruce would be highly against it. However, it wouldn’t be long before the others noticed.

You were grateful that today was a relatively slow day in the laboratory. Majority of the specimens that were scheduled for today’s tests were finished earlier than usual along with the case presentations and progress reports Mr. Stark had asked you to make. Though it seemed like such a small feat, you took it positively; today, you could finally take a breather. You hummed happily as you began arranging the mountain of paperwork around the main table.

Upon reaching for the next pile of papers, a familiar hand laid atop of yours. You smiled and looked at your raven-haired companion, admiring the way his tousled locks framed his oh-so ethereal face. 

“Do you need help, my dear doctor?” Loki asked as his thumb drew circles on your hand. Though his silvery voice tugged at your heartstrings as they always did, your cheeks were slightly tinged a light shade of red at mention of the pet name. The God never called you his doctor before.

“I can manage,” you replied as you turned your hand, interlocking your fingers with his. You kept your gaze on your hands intertwined with his, the way they fit together so perfectly. “It’s surprisingly not as busy today.”

Loki leaned down, his face close behind your neck. “A bit bold today aren’t we, pet?” he jested, breath tickling the side of your ear.

Thor observed the scene from afar, shocked. He never thought that his brother would’ve established a bond with the doctor, not in the way that Loki didn’t deserve any type of social interaction, but in the way that his brother wasn’t the easiest person to get along with. With arms crossed, the God of Thunder continued to watch as the two continued on with their intimacies, wondering when and how this managed to start. He watched the way your eyes lingered on his brother attentively; the way you were able to tug a smile on Loki’s face; the way his face lit up when you were around; the way your gentle touch was able to open a different side of Loki. 

Though he was wary of his brother and his antics, Thor disregarded his suspicions: the two of you were much too happy occupied in your bubble of… friendship? No, it was more than that. So much more. Something was blossoming, and the God of Thunder was sure of it. He was unsure of the status of you and Loki’s relationship, but nevertheless he was still happy. However, he wasn’t so sure if your uncle would be so accepting of it, knowing the bad blood between what had happened in New York.

The doors of the laboratory swept open, startling the two friends. Thor coughed loudly to alert his brother and the doctor, but it was already too late for them to fall back to a more believably platonic position. Out came Mr. Stark and Uncle Bruce from the elevators, both shocked at the closeness of you and Loki. Tony looked more curious than shocked at the development. Your uncle, on the other hand, radiated a crushing aura, and, although Uncle Bruce’s face seemed calm and collected at the moment, you knew very well that there was anger hidden underneath it. He always warned you about Loki and the danger he could bring if you got involved, so it was no surprise to you if his anger came from both concern and disappointment. 

Awkward air filled the room as the two made their way towards the laboratory’s main table. Loki stepped back away from you, whispering something along the lines of you being okay. You nodded in affirmation then looked down, averting any type of eye contact, and started to fiddle with the sheets of paper you had in hand. 

Sighing, you knew it was taboo to speak of the laboratory’s peace out loud since it always brought bad luck. Now, you’re going to have to deal with the consequences.

taglist: @gaycatlord-stuff​  @aces-tattooartist​ 

[auncyen]

"No one from the school's going to come, are they?" Shiho asks her parents, anxiety knotting her stomach. She doesn't expect caring from any of the faculty at this point, but she wouldn't put it past the principal to send someone with well wishes for appearances' sake--she wouldn't even want to see her homeroom teacher, but the idea of Kamoshida leering at her while she's helpless, too broken from her stupidity to even move--

"Shiho, sweetheart, calm down," her father urges, squeezing her hand. "What about your friend, Takamaki?"

"No, no, Ann's fine. The---the teachers. I don't want any teachers showing up."

Her parents exchange a look that's opaque to her. "That shouldn't be a problem, but we'll talk to the school to make sure."

When Ann visits, there are hugs and tears and apologies. And news.

"Did they tell you? Kamoshida is dead." Ann's blue eyes blaze, still bright with tears she hasn't yet wiped away. "He won't hurt you--or anyone--ever again."

Her expression would be striking if Shiho hadn't already been dumbstruck by her words. Kamoshida, dead. Kamoshida, gone forever. She'd thought she'd have to die to get away from him, but now he's just gone, like a dandelion's head blown away by a breath of wind. After a long moment, Shiho finally manages to ask: "How...?"

Ann's gaze shifts, and she fidgets uncomfortably. "They haven't said too much about it at school."

It makes sense the faculty wouldn't discuss a death any more than necessary, making Shiho wonder morbidly if they would have tried to hush up her death even with it happening on school grounds. Probably.

But she also wonders why it feels like Ann's lying. Maybe there have been rumors about Kamoshida's death, and Ann doesn't want to tell her something that might be wrong? Or maybe, especially considering how her parents are treating her, Ann's afraid of revealing something too disturbing.

Sakamoto visits her in the hospital too, and Shiho's touched by his kindness. They talk for a little bit, and he commiserates with her pain and dread of physical therapy. Then he asks, awfully hesitant for his own nature, "so, Takamaki tell you what happened to Kamoshida?"

"Just that he's dead."

"Yeah."

The silence that follows is downright unnatural for Sakamoto. "Are you...glad he's dead?" Shiho asks, wondering if the silence is because everything he could say is normally taboo.

Sakamoto grunts, shifting in the seat he's taken by her bed. "Glad that shithead won't hurt anyone else, yeah. But man, it didn't have to go down like that."

"How did it go down?" Shiho asks, and Sakamoto looks up at her, his jaw snapping shut as if he only just realized the implication of his own words. "How did he die?"

"I, uh--"

"I just want to know. You can tell me, I won't have a bad reaction. Just knowing he's gone is a huge weight lifted," Shiho says, trying to reassure him.

"No, I don't know anything," Sakamoto says, shifting forward in the chair. "Ignore me Suzui, I was just shooting my mouth off. Like--it's just a shame he can't do the jail time he should be doing, right?"

Right. That's a good point. It is a shame he won't know what it feels like to be trapped for days and weeks and months on end.

But Shiho thinks Sakamoto is as bad a liar as Ann.

Sakamoto doesn't visit again, which Shiho feels a little sad about, but--really, she should just be glad he visited even once. It's not like they were that close, but he was still concerned enough to check on her. Ann visits every few days, but she doesn't want to talk about Kamoshida except to be glad she's dead, and now that Shiho knows what Kamoshida was doing to Ann, she doesn't want to make her friend have to think about that man. Amamiya--no, Ren, he said she could call him that--visits with Ann sometimes, and Shiho manages to find a chance to ask when Ann makes a quick bathroom trip. Ren says he doesn't know, and then sets down his bag on the side of her bag and opens the zipper to reveal a cat that pops out like a magic trick. It's an adorable black cat, a bit on the small side with luminous blue eyes, that meows and chitters and absolutely delights Shiho in her surprise. For the rest of the visit, he's the highlight of her day.

The next day, it feels a little like the cat was a distraction, except the idea of Ren bringing a cat into the hospital just for a potential distraction seems like a stretch.

It's when Mishima visits that she finally learns something; he honestly seems eager to get it off his chest. "Someone plastered cards in the hallway accusing Kamoshida of--all the things he'd been doing," he says, "and they said they'd steal his desires. Then he just stopped coming to school. It was about a week later the news spread about him having died. The school's trying to keep up a cover story about him having been sick, but they can't even keep the details straight, and that reporter girl looked into it--he drowned in the bathtub. They think it was," and then he suddenly stops, blinking at Shiho and paling, his horror making it too obvious what he was going to say.

"They think it was suicide," Shiho says, just to get over the elephant in the room. She mulls it over. She'd thought she had to die to get away from him. There was no way he could have been going through anything nearly as awful, something he could only escape by dying. "He wouldn't kill himself just because he was accused. Not unless he thought he'd go to prison?"

"I think--I think I know who put up the cards," Mishima offers, scratching the back of his neck. "I don't know if..."

"Ann?"

Mishima looks surprised, but he really shouldn't. Shiho's had a hard time keeping herself occupied in the hospital, and observing people is one of the more interesting fallbacks, so she'd like to think she's getting better at reading them; plus, why else would he hesitate to tell her who did it? At least he ditches the hesitation after that, dropping his hand and nodding. "Yeah. Her, and Amamiya, and Sakamoto--n, not that I think they meant for this to happen! They were hanging out a lot before the cards went up, and they all had reason to be angry with Kamoshida, but the day after, when he stopped showing up, they seemed kind of...unsettled? Sakamoto's not even hanging out with the other two anymore. I think they meant to intimidate Kamoshida, but didn't expect him to react like that."

That...meshes with what Sakamoto unintentionally said, and Shiho feels better to finally know. She gets why Ann didn't want her to know, but she doesn't think any less of her for this. Ann had just been trying to make Kamoshida face some kind of consequence. He decided he couldn't. That's not Ann's fault, any more than it was Ann's fault when Shiho chose to jump.

[tossawary]

Chapter 25: “Home Sweet Home” of “pride is not the word I’m looking for” quotes and commentary. Not a full list of favorite quotes or full commentary. 

-

 Anyway, Shang Qinghua makes himself  so fucking sincerely annoying that the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators can’t figure out how to politely tell him to fuck off fast enough. Shang Qinghua makes outlandish assumptions about how many thieves there are (at least a dozen, he’s sure, probably twice that) and what methods they might be using (special invisibility talismans, he suspects); Shang Qinghua repeatedly apologizes for being too busy with important things for Cultivator O.B.B. at the last Immortal Alliance Conference, then tries to commiserate with the man about having to get important things done without getting any respect for it; Shang Qinghua also anxiously wonders if they should all go to Zhao Hua Temple Sect to report what happened here, since there’s a troublesome demon and also some sneaky rogue cultivator thieves on the loose out here! He gets turned down immediately, but assures everyone that he’ll at least let Yue Qingyuan know everything that happened here right away! 

 Liu Qingge pretty much just stands there scowling silently the entire time - he’s no Shen Qingqiu for sheer menacing  "I can and I will ruin your entire life"  glares, but he’s still pretty intimidating. He does a great job! No notes! 

 Shang Qinghua nearly pats himself on the back as he and Liu Qingge leave less than an hour after he arrives.  “Holy shit, I’m good,”  he thinks, a little giddy with the successful extraction.  “That’s a skill that good ol’ Liu-Shidi will never have!” 

 -

AN: Of course this has a high chance of backfiring. Is Shang Qinghua going to weave webs of lies anyway? Of course. 

Love the fact that Shang Qinghua can shamelessly act like a total pushover, while actually manipulating someone so that he gets the results he wanted. Some snobby sect leader walks into a negotiation room, prepared to use SQH as a doormat, and Shang Qinghua is probably internally like, “Bro, me and my jelly spine welcome you to hell.” 

- 

 He gives them the rundown on what happened, but, to his complete lack of surprise, that doesn’t seem to satisfy interrogators like his little sister-in-law and his fellow transmigrator. They have so many questions! And Shang Qinghua doesn’t have enough answers for them! 

 No, he doesn’t know what Huan Hua Palace Sect knows or thinks they know. No, he doesn’t know how they knew about that place. No, he doesn’t know whether the monster was just a local opportunist preying on distracted cultivators or something more sinister. No, he’s not experimenting with the creepy special item or discussing it at length here. No, Luo Fanli and Peerless Cucumber are not allowed to poke at the creepy special item! 

 Why the fuck would he ever let them do that?! 

 All Shang Qinghua knows is that Luo Fanli and Peerless Cucumber should eat their vegetables and then go to bed! Because they all have a long journey back to the sect in the morning! And also that words cannot describe how painfully old he feels as soon as he says this. 

-

AN: I’ve been thinking about a Demon Trio fanfic in which Mobei-Jun finds himself in a similar position with Luo Binghe and Sha Hualing. 

Mobei-Jun and Shang Qinghua are, like, bare minimum twice the age of Luo Binghe and Shen Yuan. Like, yes, neither Mobei-Jun nor Shang Qinghua are old old by the standard of the PIDW world. Yes, MBJ and SQH are stunted as all get out. But the fact that they have bare minimum 2x the life experience as Bingqiu is, in my opinion, funny as hell and severely underused in fanfiction. 

Like, imagine Mobei-Jun unintentionally dadding new demon LBH in SVSSS. Mobei-Jun being like, “Don’t eat the meat from this monster. It makes you hallucinate.” Or being like, “These people aren’t politically important enough to be shown this kind of respect. Look down on them properly and go sleep, or no one will ever respect you again in demon politics.” 

MBJ looking at SVSSS LBH and SHL like, “Damn, who raised you?” 

Because, like, I love to joke about Mobei-Jun being an oblivious fool, but that’s in regards to human culture. Mobei-Jun operating on demonic culture + his level of arrogance in regards to how he’s handling SQH suggests that MBJ can be politically savvy among demons when he wants to be. Also, the mental picture of MBJ being like, “Eat your weird demon vegetables, there’s nothing wrong with them, you picky half-breed brat,” is extremely funny. 

I’ll probably turn this into a separate post. 

- 

Shang Qinghua does  not  miss the man’s unconcealed  “oh, great, some of my favorite problem people are back, probably with bad news”  expression when they arrive. The man is not at all impressed to hear about the drugged-up Shadow Cave Wolf Spiders or the evil, murderous, madness-inducing plant they fought on their mission, but the Qian Cao Peak Lord is reluctantly, partially placated by the jar of three-eyed skeleton tears Shang Qinghua super thoughtfully brought back for his inspection. Mu Qingfang really likes his research projects! 

 Shang Qinghua lets himself feel kind of good about this gift - he’s the man who gets things and gets things done - and ignores the Weeper’s Eye whispering in his head,  “He has resigned himself to the untimely deaths of everyone he knows.” 

 (Wow. Oh, Shang Qinghua knows that feeling!) 

-

AN: Mu Qingfang doesn’t think that everyone around him is inevitably going to die, he’s just extremely aware of how dangerous the world is and how reckless cultivators can be. Also, for many years, he was fairly certain that Liu Qingge and Shen Qingqiu were headed for bad ends. 

This felt like a good place to insert some optimism back into the sect in general. Luo Fanli has been cured and is willingly going to visit her sister, Liu Qingge has got a hold on his self-destructive tendencies, Mu Qingfang thinks things are getting better, Shen Qingqiu’s health problems have been essentially fixed, Qijiu might actually work their shit out, Shen Yuan shares his real name with Shang Qinghua, and so on and so forth. 

It felt like a good contrast with and buildup towards Luo Binghe’s Skinner mistake (not everything is rosy yet, there are still growing problems), the secret basement, and the encounter with Bing-Ge. 

Only to flip that around and then bring some surprise Moshang into things! 

- 

“I have now been informed that, after learning that you had returned and, at the very least, completing the duties that were intended to have him reflect on his actions, he has disappeared yet again,” Shen Qingqiu continues. “This second disappearance has set some of the other junior disciples into a renewed panic, which has concerned some of the senior disciples, which was, apparently, cause to alert me.”   

 “Ah,” Shang Qinghua says. 

-

AN: Shen Jiu should not be in charge of a bunch of children, but it is funny to imagine him going through the same “be a less shit person” adoption process as Shang Qinghua. Like, oh, it would be so easy for him to be cruel about this situation, but fuck you if he’s going to be outdone in the recovery and redemption process by Shang Qinghua of all people. 

Shang Qinghua: *grows into a kind of decent person* 

Shen Jiu: “Fuck you. That’s not allowed.” 

Shen Jiu: “...” 

Shen Jiu: “Well, if THAT FUCKER of all people can do it...” 

- 

 Shang Qinghua doesn’t have to look long or far to find his nephew. He finds the young protagonist sitting despondently on the doorstep of his own Leisure House, sniffling into his sleeve. Peerless Cucumber of all people is sitting beside him and keeping him company. 

  “Focusing on other people’s lives is easier than looking at his own.” 

 “-think a drowning man first has to save himself… or else he’s only going to bring down the people he’s trying to save,” Peerless Cucumber is saying. 

 Binghe nods. 

- 

AN: Going by, like, the everything of SVSSS, Shen Yuan really is the asshole going, “I’ll die before I look inwards to recognize and deal with my own emotions.” Also, going, “Yes, I’m a hypocrite who won’t take my own advice. And what about it?” What a repressed nerd. 

- 

 Shang Qinghua clears his throat to get their attention. Both kids (well, teenager and young adult, but still...  kids)  look up and then stand up quickly. Luo Binghe takes a forgetful step forward, before he wobbles into an appropriate respectful bow instead. 

 “Shang-Shishu!” 

  “How dearly this boy is loved!”  the Weeper’s Eye declares, in its soft way inside Shang Qinghua’s head.  “More than life itself! More than death itself!” 

 “Ah, never mind all that,” Shang Qinghua says, and steps forward to wrap his nephew in a quick hug instead, keeping the creepy talking eye oriented away from his nephew. “You’re a little too late to talk to me about your mission before your shizun did.” 

 Binghe, who was just relaxing into the unexpected hug, freezes. 

 Shang Qinghua knowingly pats the poor young protagonist on the back.

  “Oh, shit” is right! 

- 

AN: Uncle Shang really is adorable. Still kind of knocks me for a loop writing it, though, given that the SVSSS SQH and LBH relationship is... nothing like this whatsoever. Look upon the field of SQH and LBH content and see that it is relatively barren except for the stubborn motherfuckers with excellent taste in character exploration. 

-

  “Ahhh, well, I’ll be there too for this potential family reunion, bro,” Shang Qinghua assures him. “Maybe we can finally get to the bottom of where this ‘Shen Yuan’ name came from.” 

 Peerless Cucumber makes a strange expression. 

 “What?” 

 “...It’s my name.” 

 “What?” Shang Qinghua repeats. 

 “It’s my name,” Peerless Cucumber says again, quietly. “It’s my real name.” 

 “Oh.” 

  “Huh,” Shang Qinghua thinks, having been operating on the assumption that the System made the name up for its mysterious backstory. Well, that gives new dimensions to Peerless Cucumber’s criticism of the scum villain! 

 “You can use it,” Peerless Cucumber says, with an air of determined nonchalance. “Everyone else is doing it.” 

 “Ah, alright. Thanks.” 

- 

AN: This is probably the part where I would have made Shang Qinghua reveal his original name in turn... IF HE HAD ONE. It drives me... kind of wild that we get the Airplane Extras and we STILL don’t get 1) Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky’s original name, and 2) MOBEI-JUN’s name. 

Which actually makes things a little more interesting here, in my opinion, even though not having those names gets a little frustrating in terms of fanfiction writing. With Mobei-Jun, you get to explore the fucked up possibilities of him not having a name outside of his identity as the future Northern King. With Shang Qinghua, you get to explore him being a squirrelly little fuck who refuses to let anyone into his life. 

So, because we don’t have Airplane’s name, we actually get this mildly interesting dynamic in which Shang Qinghua doesn’t even really think to reveal it to Shen Yuan. We don’t see this part, but Shen Yuan is actually a little miffed by this degree of secrecy, which is going to come up later. (Shen Yuan doesn’t like the fact that Shang Qinghua has as much power over him as he does.) 

I personally do not hold the headcanon that Airplane’s name was “Shang Qinghua”. It’s a little too on the nose for me. At that point, the only reaction to transmigrating into SQH kind of has to be, “Ah, well, I was asking for that!” Maybe Airplane projected his worst qualities onto Shang Qinghua, but I don’t think he went so far as to give the character his own name. 

Airplane’s main identity when he died appears to have been Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky, and we know that he wasn’t particularly close to his divorced parents and any step- or half-siblings. So, the only names that are really relevant post-transmigration are “Airplane Shooting Towards The Sky” and “Shang Qinghua”. By the time that SY gets here, he’s firmly entrenched in those identities, and his original name is completely irrelevant. I could honestly believe that Airplane just doesn’t think it matters anymore. 

- 

 Shang Qinghua’s nephew, in the way of a true young protagonist or  fucking cannon fodder, got the bright fucking idea to slip away to speak with the concubine called Butterfly privately. 

 “I thought: what if she didn’t want to speak in front of that lecherous old man? What if she wanted to get away from him?” Binghe confesses. 

 “She was the demon,” Shang Qinghua guesses. 

 Binghe nods, voice breaking. “It was…  I was  really,  really stupid, Uncle.” 

 “Well, at least you know that,” Shang Qinghua sighs, and pats his sniffly nephew on the back again. 

 Oh, he can see why Shen Qingqiu was  pissed the fuck off now. Shang Qinghua kind of wants to start yelling! Or maybe just screaming, coherently or otherwise! 

 Except yelling isn’t going to help much right now. 

 Shang Qinghua listens as Luo Binghe recounts being captured by the demon and then waking up bound by Immortal Binding Cables - of being so terrified that he could barely breathe with it. His only hope was Ning Yingying and Ming Fan tattling on his disappearance and a senior disciple tracking him down on time. The skinner demon apparently nearly killed Binghe, crooning over his young and beautiful skin, except a flash of warm light intervened and dropped an unstable part of the ceiling in on them before they could hurt the captured protagonist. 

 “Fu-Shijie and Shizun arrived after that and k-killed it,” Binghe says. “Uncle, it was all  stupid luck!  Shizun said I should have been dead and that, between my efforts and the demon’s, he had no idea how I wasn't! And he was right! It was  so close! If the ceiling hadn’t fallen in like that-! Fu-Shijie suggested the ropes might be faulty and it could have been an unconscious use of spiritual energy, but I didn’t do anything! It wasn’t me!” 

 It  sounds like the System to Shang Qinghua, intervening again at a crucial moment to prevent the premature death of the protagonist. Just thinking about how close his nephew came to dying without him knowing is nearly enough to inspire a cold sweat! Shang Qinghua can’t speak about the System, so all he can really do is keep hugging! Keep holding on for dear life and saying soothing nothings to his crying nephew! 

- 

AN: I wanted to include the Skinner mission, but I didn’t want to redo it onscreen because that’s been done in many fanfictions before and I felt that there was really no good reason for Shang Qinghua to be a part of it. The reason I wanted to include it is to show how the plot is off the track of the SVSSS (and PIDW) stories, with the changed LBH and the changed Original SQQ. 

LBH wants to be a hero, but he’s not there yet. 

- 

 “...Don’t put yourself above him… or below him. Tell him what you want and listen to what he wants, and don’t be surprised if things don’t change all at once,” Shang Qinghua advises and, at Yue Qingyuan’s look, quickly raises his hands. “Ahhh, not my business, I know! Not my business! I just… I hope it works out! I hope you two get something better out of this mess! Aha, make the sect meetings a little less awkward and… things.” 

  “He has never known what better looks like. He will always be Yue Qi, the slave boy. No matter what he does.” 

 “...Thank you,” Yue Qingyuan says finally, thoughtfully. “I appreciate your… restraint in this matter… in recent months.” 

 Aha, yikes. 

-

AN: I know that some people wanted more stomping on Yue Qingyuan, but... like... this man is as or nearly as traumatized as Shen Qingqiu. His childhood fucking sucked. He broke his own soul trying to save Shen Jiu and failed. He made some shit decisions where Shen Qingqiu was concerned, but the logic and trauma he’s operating on are pretty obvious. He was trying. 

Part of the theme around the Qijiu and Moshang arcs has also been “an eye for an eye”. Like, are you guys really going to keep on not communicating with each other and then fucking up and then taking chunks out of each other? How many misunderstandings and upset over misunderstandings are you going to throw at each other? Where do you put your foot down and say, “I don’t want to live like this forever. We can be better than this. I want better than this.” 

Like, it can’t just be hurting each other back and forth (this applies to Qijiu more than Moshang, in which MBJ definitely carries the weight of this fuck-up). It can’t just be privately nursing hurt feelings forever. The options here are “fix it” or “live like this forever”. Fixing it won’t happen immediately, but the other option fucking sucks, so every little step helps. 

So Shang Qinghua here is just like, “Bro, I’m tired. My anger has cooled a lot. I just want all our lives to suck less. I hope things work out for you.” 

[the-power-of-stuff]

Writing a little Suki meta because I’m working on a Suki-centric fic for the ATLA Big Bang and it’s honestly been a struggle for me to figure out how exactly I want to handle her character arc. And I want to explore a scene that always bothers me a little bit when I watch it, but that I think is really good fodder for whatever I’m trying to do with Suki in my story: the almost-kiss on a moonlit bluff scene from The Serpent’s Pass.

Don’t get me wrong, this is one of my absolute favorite scenes in the show and it’s such a beautiful and poignant moment for Sokka and Suki. There’s a lot to work with in this scene from the perspective of analyzing character development, especially with regards to Sokka coming to terms with his own trauma. However! It’s exactly that part — the Sokka coming to terms with trauma part — that lays the groundwork for what bothers me about the scene, and it’s this:

[ID: Sokka and Suki are seated side-by-side, bathed in moonlight. Suki is looking at Sokka, but Sokka is looking away from her. Sokka says, “Something happened at the North Pole and I couldn’t protect someone…” end ID]

[ID: Close-up of Suki’s face. She’s looking to the side out of the corner of her eyes, away from Sokka, who is out of the frame. She says, “I lost someone I cared about. He didn’t die, he just went away.” end ID]

Girl straight-up acknowledges that someone died because of whatever this thing was that happened at the North Pole, which Sokka takes responsibility for, and she blows right past that to start talking about how she’s been missing this boy she met all of once as if that’s somehow comparable. 

(Suki, honey, later when you try to tease your boyfriend about how you “didn’t know” he “made out with the moon spirit” — well, now, whose fault is that?? Hm??)

Look, the thing is, we all know people like this. You’re telling your friend about something shitty that just happened to you and suddenly they’re all, “Oh, that reminds me of this one time that…” and you’re like, “Hello? We were talking about me?” Sometimes people do this because they’re clueless and just want to talk about themselves. Often people do this because they think that by sharing their own experiences, they’re commiserating and showing you that they understand how you feel. I think what Suki’s doing is somewhere in the middle.

Suki unapologetically goes after what she wants. 

We know Suki’s not callous. She rescues Appa and is exceedingly gentle with him when she does so. She stays behind at Boiling Rock after Sokka announces his intentions to wait and see if his father will show up. And after Sokka pulls away when they’re about to kiss on that moonlit bluff, she respects his boundaries and apologizes for crossing a line she wasn’t sure was there.

In fact, Suki breezing past Sokka’s confession about losing someone in the North Pole is what creates the tension that leads to Sokka’s denial and her subsequent apology in the first place. If she had asked Sokka about who he lost, they would have gotten everything out in the open. They may have even kissed for the first time that night after discussing Sokka’s fear and guilt and reaching some kind of healthy resolution from which they could move on together. 

Instead, in that moment, Suki demonstrates an inability to put someone else’s emotions before her own desires. Because Sokka’s feelings around his loss are never confronted, they collide with his feelings for Suki, leaving him conflicted and ultimately unable to resolve either. 

It would be easy to paint Suki as insensitive in this moment, if not for the fact that she apologizes and stays put while Sokka walks away — he clearly has some shit to deal with and wants to do it without her, so she doesn’t push it. Rather, I think Suki was just single-mindedly pursuing something she wanted. 

I mean, she really just runs into Sokka for the first time in probably months, unabashedly flirts with him, then, what, takes PTO from her security guard position? so she can accompany him on a treacherous days-long journey across a deadly pass. She likes this boy, but they’re in the middle of a war, and who knows when or if they’ll ever get to see each other again, so, screw it, she is going for it. Can you blame her? Like...get it, girl.

But she’s too far inside of her own head.

Have you ever thought about someone in a romantic fantasy kind of a way for weeks (at least) and then when you’re finally presented with an opportunity to act, all you can think about is, “How do I make this happen?” I like to think that’s where Suki’s head was that night. She sees Sokka, she wants Sokka, she spends the day wondering if he really learned his lesson about women being perfectly capable human beings, and when he finally admits that he’s been annoyingly overprotective all day not because he doesn’t think she’s a strong and talented lady but because he’s afraid of losing her, she’s like, “Oh, thank god, let’s make out.” The fact that he’s afraid of losing her because he’s already lost someone else is, like...not the thing that sticks, because she’s so preoccupied with her end goal of the two of them acting on their mutual feelings for each other. 

Does that make it less of a gaffe that she doesn’t more sensitively acknowledge Sokka’s loss? No. But it’s also not as if her lack of acknowledgement occurs without consequence — Sokka ultimately cannot kiss her, which really means he cannot open up to her, even though he clearly likes her. 

Would it have been nice for them to have had an honest conversation about what actually happened that night? Yes. But that’s what fanfiction is for. ;)

And this is something about Suki that I’m trying to explore in my Big Bang fic: her tendency to single-mindedly pursue a goal to a fault, to the extent that it can create conflict with people she loves, even if her intentions are good.

So, anyway, wish me luck, because as it turns out, character development is hard.  😖