#and yet the tenderness?? the care?? goddd

[vanmarkus]

we talked about Eddie holding Buck's hand, but not about the gentleness of his other hand on Buck's ribs and I'm crying into my pillow as we speak

[kevinsdsy]

(Kevin and Renee anon again... Sorry) I agree with that other anon's hot take so much because it's true and I love how they pointed out the fact that he portrys his care via exy. And to expand on your point about the team for Jean, not only did he find him a team opposite to the Ravens, but he's been helping them help him adjust as well. He found Jean a team with people he trusts to be able to actually help him. Jean even protested it but Kevin knew it was what would help him.. And I'm always thinking about the scene of him asking for Jean's hand to check it, making sure he could still close it and mobilize it, I'm not sure if it's because of what happened to himself but augh, the way he knows Jean so well makes me ill. Any question Jeremy has about him, he's answered easily. His conversations with him are so tender and just....he really cares about Jean. Random head canon but I think his love language could be gift giving because of the trinkets and post cards he'd get Jean from his travels. Plus, in when he bought Neil the racket and I know it was with the team's card but I'm under the belief he just likes buying stuff because it's easier to express that he cares and notices those he loves through buying them things he knows they'll enjoy/like. Not to mention he allowed Neil to fully be sure of his choices instead of going by himself and just getting a racquet he deemed the best.

Somebody fucking talk about History with him right now, I just know he'd be so animated while talking about it. It's literally an important interest that's set aside exy and yet they ignore him to then complain he's "all exy" 🙂‍↔️.

I can write much more and more coherently but it's 7am and I'm running on 2hrs of sleep and m&m's myb 🙂‍↕️ I can't promise this is my last Kevin Day anon but uhm I'll stop being annoying for now 🧎

GODDD THE SCENE WITH HIM ANALYSING JEAN’S HAND AND HIM TAKING THE TIME TO PREPARE JEREMY TO JEAN’S ARRIVAL IS JUST SO !!!!! makes me cry just thinking about it actually ntm when jeremy calls him asking if riko broke kevin’s hand and it’s so noticeable how kevin is jumping around the topic a bit. instead of immediately answering he asks if jean has told them about it and then he finally admits the truth and tells jeremy it’s something he doesn’t tell people since the issue is resolved now anyways and it’s all just so !!!!!

his love language being gift giving/acts of service is also such a good headcanon and i think it fits him so well especially like !!! especially because he went out of his way to buy jean magnets & get him postcards whenever he was away

HISTORY KEVIN DAY IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME!!! like the nerd is reading history books for fun and watching every history documentary he can get around to and i think he will go through phases when he starts hyperfixtating on specific topics (but i’m not as familiar with a lot of history topics so i can’t really give my take on which topics that would be) which also leads to my headcanon of him needing glasses, but hiding this fact by wearing lenses, because why would we not want to make him a history nerd wearing glasses and carrying books around him at all times like

AND PLSSS you’re MORE than welcome joining me in my inbox i LOVE talking about kevin he’s fr the loml

[kithtaehyung]

Ryen, omg! What made you think it is okay to start with "come shower with me" ? Huh? Ahmrghhhhhhh this is so good I'm afraid I can't survive the whole "flutter"! But, why do I think that you once wrote a "flutter" too? Oh maybe that time you're just revealing the title? It feels like a deja vu.

I love this aftercare things. I'm a sucker for aftercare 🥺. This is too sweet. I love it when you wrote Yoongi just "ignore" the sniff and all, and he just continue taking a very good care of her. And when he asks for permission, "can I"? Hell! Ahhhhh I love that shit! And the stray kiss. Gahhhhhhhh. I was blushing and having short breath reading this. I paused few times, i need to calm down because the butterflies in my stomach reacted too hahahahha. I can feel the hot flushed rushed to my face wth! 😭

LMAO oh my goddd the first line😭 i knew it was gonna be beginning with a bang but it's the last line before the timeskip in forfeit! had to set the scene so we knew where we were<3 and i haven't written a flutter yet, so you may have just seen the title card in a previous post!

ah, yes. the tender moments we haven't really seen at this level yet.. yoongi doesn't say too much right now in the teaser, does he? he's mostly just there and letting reader think, and it isn't until they get inside that he says a lot at once. :')) must've been on his mind ever since that first time.. 😭

omfg i understand you completely! i'm needing to take breaths while writing this, as well lol this is way too much for even me to handle! butterflies everywhere are you kidding🦋 everyone is crumbling and it's all their fault UGHHH

[dragonspine-jpg]

what do you think ab kamisato ayato?? personally i want him to degrade me and use his status against me all the time 😭 also can i be ☁️ anon

OMG i just know he's so hot. i've seen so much attractive fanart of his potential design and PHEW he already owns me. tall sexy clan head?? ayaka's older brother?? soft but commanding at the same time?? i don't always want to bottom for men, but i'd let this man rail the hell out of me 😩

YES i can picture him using degradation in bed, and making you call him titles (like 'master', or 'sir', etc) while he fucks you. he probably has a corruption kink too? and the status thing FOR SURE. he'd remind you of your place and all that. also this is a super random headcanon but i feel like he'd touch your face a lot (e.g. cupping your cheeks in both of your hands when he's soft and in love) and specifically when he's commanding and filthy he'd hold your chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilt your head up. (also opening your mouth with his fingers but woahh let's not unpack that rn).

i also feel like the degradation thing would be a total switch-up in his personality too?? like i imagine he generally has a softer, romantic and tender personality (it's canon that he's very kind). but then the moment he's in a sexual situation he's filthy as hell, and super degrading. it's a total 180. it would be so hot oh my goddd. i bet his aftercare would be godly then. very soft and he'd take very good care of you. would definitely light candles and run a bath and carry you in his arms.

as for his apprearance, i personally imagine that he'd be very tall and super pretty, with long pale blue hair like ayaka's put up in a high ponytail? (i hope he gets zhongli's height model). i wistfully imagine that he's a mixture between like really beautiful and ethereal, and a commanding aura. also i hope he wears eyeliner/eyeshadow like xiao and zhongli, as a treat 🤲

here are two pieces of fanart of him that i love: one, two.

no bc why am i so in love with a man who hasn't even appeared in canon yet, help meee

and of course you can be ☁️ anon !! it's nice to meet you ♡

[bisexual-horror-fan]

Oh my god so this is going to be hard to come up with something you would write mostly because you have gone OFF writing some of the kinkiest shit so trying to come up with something new is a bit hard but LETS TRY IT

So. This is for Freddy because Obviously. I can definitely see you writing some Freddy with a heavy bondage element, like Freddy tying the reader up with whatever sort of dream powers he has whether it's something from the environment or actual ropes and such. And THEN we get into bastard time, essentially Freddy having you spread and easy access for him to tease and fuck and do whatever he wants to you while you squirm and beg. But he just edges you for HOURS as the bastard does. And then at the very end, because you fucking love that shit, he either makes you ruin your orgasm or edge you and not let you come and you wake up like that, having been so fucking close the entire night and basically needing to take care of yourself on your own without him like you wanted. Because he is a Bastard.

So how well did i do? ;P

YOU!

Lottie!?

How fucking DARE YOU!?

Okay so you wanna know HOW fucking much this is my kinda shit? How agressively and personally this is tailored to my tastes? I was just going to do a snippet! A taste, for the flavor, for FUN! And INSTEAD! It evolved into a 1k oneshot so here it fucking is! My favorite man with some of my faveorite fucking kinks. I love ya, I hate ya, God bless ya Lottie.

---

Rating. Explicit. Length. 1K. Freddy Krueger X AFAB! Reader. Warnings. Rope Play. Restrained Reader. Extreme Frusteration. Orgasm Denial. Edging. Begging. Vaginal Fingering. Teasing. Mocking. Crying Reader. Ruined Orgasm. Bexxx Feeding Her Own Kinks And Extreme Self Indulgence.

---

All Night Long.

---

You groaned, struggling against the ropes that were biting into your tender and sweat slicked skin. He actually used ropes this time, normally he didn’t but this time he had taken the time to tie you up and it made all this so much worse, the build up was so slow, drew the whole experience out.

It had been hours.

Literal hours since he first tied you up and started this. So there he was, settled between your legs, leisurely fingering you, two fingers fucking in and out of you at a steady pace, hitting that sweet spot over and over. His gloved hand rested on your mound, blades splayed out, thumb flicking over your clit and you were approaching that edge, yet again and you cried out, “Please! Fu-fuck, ple-ase! Goddd-”

“I knew I was important to you but calling me God? That is a nickname I could get used to.” You groaned even louder at how fucking awful he was being, hips tried to stir but you were tied far too well, he hadn’t stopped or slowed, you were getting closer and closer, panting, nearly there, “Please?! Fr-Freddy, please?”

It left you so frantically and he cocked his head to the side, smirk on his face as he said, “Awe, did I already lose my new pet name? Terrible.”

“Shit, nearly-ah! Ple-please?!” He hummed in consideration, really thinking about it, another curl of his fingers and you gasped, then he said simply, casually, as if it wasn’t a massive deal and would bring literal hours of your frustration to an end, “Sure, you can cum.”

“Really?!” You couldn’t believe it, but it had been ages, you had definitely earned it by now, had probably paid your dues, had suffered and sweated and nearly leaked your brain out of your cunt. “Really.” He said with a confident nod and you moaned out, “Tha-thank you!”

So close, now that you knew you had permission you really allowed yourself to enjoy this, every single second of the climb, moaning and panting, eyes shut tight, so consumed with the feeling, his touch was just fucking right, hands working both of those spots just so, “Yes! Yes! Yes, gonna, M’ gonna-”

And just as you were about to tip over his fingers were ripped out of you and his other hand was off of you and your eyes flew back open, fists clenched, fighting against the ropes as you cried out, “No! No, no, no! Fuck-” He was laughing, watching you struggle helplessly and you were quickly rambling out, “-you sa-said! You fuckin’ said I could-”

“Oh I know just what I said. That hasn’t changed. Go on! Cum.” Son of a fucking bitch. He knew what he was doing. How were you supposed to cum with no stimulation to carry you over? What he said made you suck in a harsh inhale through your teeth, at the pulse of heat that ran through you and straight to your clit. No, no, oh God fucking no. This couldn’t be happening, your nails were biting into your palms and your eyes were wide with fear, every muscle in your body tense.

He was still watching and he was almost grinning, “Need a bit of help to get over?”

You shook your head, staring up at him, “N-no, no, Freddy please-” You could feel it. How close you were to absolute ruin. You begged, so quiet, breathless, and he said oh so confidently, “No it’s okay, don’t feel embarrassed. We all need a bit of help sometimes. Let me-” His gloved hand lowered and went right back to where it had been previously, his thumb flicked over your straining clit and you bit your lip so hard it almost bled, eyes pleading, whimper tearing out of your throat, you were still right fucking there, even after him stopping, the edge hadn’t backed off at all.

He finished that thought with another pass of his thumb, “-provide.”

Your head tipped back, thighs were trembling, chorus of ‘no’s’ still spilling from your mouth and he said, “Ooo almost. One more?” He asked in that awful mocking way of his and true to his word there was one more rub of his thumb and you tipped over, the second he felt that first throb of your clit and saw your cunt clench he pulled back, hands off, his eyes staring between your legs as he watched the reward for all his hard work and effort.

A sob ripped from your throat as he ruined your orgasm, tears spilled forth, running down your face as you cried, feeling yourself clench and pulse around nothing, trying to wiggle your hips, gain even the slightest bit of stimulation but the ropes held true and you got nothing. Feeling the pleasure slip away, like sand through your fingers, lost, fading to nothing. You were sobbing now, your whole body would be wracked with them if the ropes weren’t so fucking tight.

He ruined your orgasm.

Perfectly.

“Must have been a good one! Look at you, came so hard you're crying.” You knew his angle all too well, that phrase he has told you so many times previously is still stuck in your head, “A cum is a ruin and a ruin is a cum.”

You groaned in frustration, fists unclenching, hands hanging loosely, as you shook your head. “No? Wasn’t good enough? Do you want another one?”

Before you could say another thing his non-gloved hand was between your legs, two fingers sliding inside of you, “What a greedy little thing. So selfish-” a weak moan pulled from you and then his two fingers hooked and found that spot that immediately made you tense again with a gasp. “-I think I know the problem-” You couldn’t look away at his hand between your legs, watching his fingers plunging in and out of you, mouth hanging open, panting breaths spilling out, mind was practically blank, couldn’t string together a sentence, barely able to listen to him, and yet you still registered what he said next, “-you didn’t make a mess. Not a REAL orgasm unless you squirt, am I right?”

The only thing worse than a ruined orgasm was a squirting ruined orgasm. And he knew that. You sobbed again, and he said in that overly sickeningly sweet tone, “Awe I know. I’m just so generous, too good to be true, hmm?”

Yeah that was one way to put it.

“You’re lucky I love to spoil you.”

Lucky, lucky you.

[basket-of-loquats]

hello! I will begin by saying I LOVE your art and aspire to be anywhere near as good someday. Also, I've seen you draw a lot of songxiao. So if you know any good fics with them could you please recommend? Thanks!

AHHH THANK YOU!!!! goddd my fucking heart...

also, DO I??? holy shit ok *cracks knuckles*

(this got a bit long haha WHOOPS so adding a cut) (it’s worth it tho)

some amazing and popular songxiao fics that any basic songxiao fan HAS to read:

Cultivation No. 6 by Irrelevancy (Desc: His was a boutique-y set-up, the sixth branch of Cultivation, a fairly successful local corporation, tucked away in between the hills of their city.Song Lan owns a plant shop and takes care of all things living. A reincarnation AU.)

Ok i don’t even like reincarnation aus that much but FUCK, this one got me. super super cute and sweet with a touch of angst and fantastic but not too agonizing slow burn.

through carrion glass, the stars by tombenough_and_continent (Desc: Wei Wuxian does not walk out of the Burial Mounds after three months.Instead, Xiao Xingchen does.)

i’m. pretty sure that every songxiao shipper has read this one. but putting it here just in case because you need to read. 

We built our own house (out of sweat and dust) by Irrelevancy (Desc: Song Lan gets to Yi City just a bit earlier, and A-Qing asks her Daozhang some very pressing questions about the Stranger. This changes everything.Yi City fix-it.)

holy mother of god. i can’t even begin with this one. read it. just read it.

two corpses we were (two corpses i saw) by punchmonk (Desc: “Xingchen,” Baoshan Sanren sighs. “He only needs one eye to see.” OR: A look at Xiao Xingchen and Song Zichen's relationship through the eyes of the women around them.)

songxiao fix-its with hozier lyrics in the title is something that can be so personal actually,

palm to palm is holy palmers’ kiss by iodhadh (Desc:The realization strikes Song Lan like a bolt of lightning: Xiao Xingchen laughs, and he wants with a sudden, stunning desperation to kiss the mirth from his beautiful mouth. How, precisely, he is meant to manage that—that, he has no idea at all.Or: introspective meditations on touch, trust, and the problem of desire.}

you looking for a canon-compliant get together fic that is beautifully written, full of yearning, and just altogether fantastic? this is it baby

some underrated but fucking fantastic fics too:

every brittle marvelous breathing by Irrelevancy (Desc: They returned to the campsite at the same time, and Song Lan automatically tucked his hands behind his back.Canon era winter time fluff)

this is one of those fics that had me literally grinning the entire time i was reading. very well written, super soft and fluffy

coming up lavender by thistleghost (Desc is too long for me to put here, but it’s a xxc survives yi city au where they’re both hurting a lot but sticking together despite it)

I DONT CARE WHAT I HAVE TO SAY TO GET YOU TO READ THIS ONE, BUT PLEASE DO. it’s not finished yet, but i don’t care. it’s AMAZING. the writing is beautiful, the yearning is UGHHHHHHHH, the tenderness, the soft moments of levity where they let themselves smile again??? don’t touch me ok i hurt

wait for me (we’ll meet again) by oliviadalstonbrowning (Desc:  Song Lan goes to Cloud Recesses looking for answers.)

So uh, this fic. to this day, this fic is the only fanfiction that has made me cry. real, actual, tears pouring down my face, shaking breathing, ugly noise crying. this hurt me so so bad but in such a good way. please. read. 

Trying to Move Forward, Together by GrapfruitSketches (Desc:  Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen are alive, healthy, and most importantly, together. But they still have a long way to go.)

i wasn’t sure whether to put this up with the popular fics cuz it has almost 2,000 hits which is lot for songxiao fics, but like. that’s STILL SO underrated with the majesty which is this fic. this author writes xiao xingchen’s healing process so beautifully, not taking any shortcuts and giving us the full experience of xiao xingchen healing from his trauma and songxiao simply flourishing together. this was one of the first songxiao fics i read and to this day is one of my faves.

In Your Touch is Beauty by Wei-Zhan (Shortened Desc:  'Xiao Xingchen does not lie.' 'Xiao Xingchen thinks we would make a cute couple.')

at the end of the day, i always, always, always come back to this fic. it’s sweet, fluffy, in character, just. everything you could ever want out of a fic, and it’s criminally underrated. again, this is one of the first songxiao fics i’ve read and it’s always stuck with me and it makes me smile so much. 

OK THAT’S ALL FOLKS! i actually have more fics than that i wanted to suggest but this was just getting too long lmao. if you want my FULL rec list here’s my bookmarks on ao3! Just filter them for songxiao.

[imagine-organization-xiii]

ranking from best to worst at eating out s/o

this is another one that sam did when she wasn’t busy. she’s honestly such a queen, y’all should all go give her some love at nopantssaturday

this post is nsfw so read with caution! the naughtiest bits are below the cut. Enjoy!

oOoOo

Pussy Professional: Larxene, Saix, Xigbar, Axel

Not a pro but a really fast learner: Marluxia, Luxord, Zexion

Prefers to work with their hands: Lexaeus, Xaldin, Marluxia, Vexen, Xemnas

Loves the mess: Xigbar, Luxord, Axel

Thinks they’re hot shit but could use some work with technique: Vexen, Demyx

Does NOT like the mess: Xemnas, Marluxia, Vexen

What the heck is eating out? Are we going to McDonalds or something?: Roxas, Xion, Demyx

1) Saix - the man just KNOWS what he’s doing. How much experience does he have?? Goddd he is rough and quick but he can have you reeling in no time at all.

2) Larxene - Listen. LISTEN. She has been AROUND the BLOCK. And she KNOWS what women want. This bitch will too you and have you screaming out. And she just adores the sounds you make.

3) Axel - Honestly just loves making his partner cum over over over again if he can help it?? He is an affectionate lover and just loves to show his appreciation for you. Also just a silver tongue. And that shit goes hand in hand. He’s smooth. But don’t get him emotional or he’ll start tearing up and then it’s less foreplay and more tender sex.

4) Xigbar -  the man just loves eating pussy. He loves the mess. He loves it when you sit on his face and he drowns in your essence. He loves it all. Only loses points bc 1, he gets real cocky, and 2, bc he gets so into it he almost forgets why he’s there. But he is still a top contender

5) Xaldin - picky about who he takes to bed with him. He usually will only take such a step with someone that he really and truly feels connected to. (He’s had a lot of heartbreak before. You get it.) The man is weary in love but when he loves you, He really loves you. Wants you to feel in ways that you have never felt before. He’s out of practice and much prefers you cumming at his hand but he will provide. 

6) Marluxia - the man is still a quick learner and loves picking up what his partner reacts most to, but really does not enjoy the mess on his face. The man likes cleanliness. But in return he will work you over your petals with his delicate hands until you’re a mess.  Lower on the list bc you can tell he isn’t enjoying it as much as he could be and it brings you out of it a little bit.

7) Luxord - A passionate man. Wants to please his partner any way possible. He loves being messy and loves having his way with you. Objectively still good. Adequate. But is not as well versed in the art as his fellow members. Also loses points because his goatee is scratchy. Some people like that though?

8) Lexaeus - Soft passionate man that wants his partner to feel as good as can be. But he is cautious. He doesn’t want to hurt his SO and being a man of his size has led to him being cautious. He’s very slow. And you almost want to push him to go quicker but don’t want to push him from his comfort zone. Honestly much better with his hands, and would rather you perched on his thick, calloused and agile fingers.

9) Zexion - he’s young and in love. He’s probably never done this before. And no matter how much research you do and people you ask, it all relies on experiences he hasn’t had yet. But if you’re patient, and willing to show him the way, he has the potential to work his way to the top of this list.

10) Xemnas - you’re probably thinking “oh he’s the man in charge he knows what he’s doing.” Well listen, if the foreplay isn’t some grandiose form of power play, Xemnas isn’t much into it. He’s busy. He likes to get to it if there isn’t much in it for him. It’s just how he is. So.. it isn’t that he is bad and eating out, it’s just that he never does it so we actually don’t know?? He could be number one. But we really aren’t sure. Jury’s out on that one.

11) Vexen - okay sure he’s been around the block a few times, but Vexen is a man of science and a man of HIGH work ethic. Even in his youth he wasn’t one for... romantic exploits. But he’s trying. He’s nervous and embarrassed but he’s trying for you. Because he cares. And you of all people know that when Vexen tries to perfect something he will not stop until he does so. Sadly he hasn’t gotten there yet. But one day. For now? yeah it’s not pretty.

12) Demyx - this boy barely knows what a pussy looks like let alone how to eat one. He doesn’t even know most vernacular for the act. He just calls it a blowjob. He has no experience and does no research to learn what to do. He just jumps in and thinks he’s hot shit. You better tell him what to do or else he’s gonna get you nowhere and think his king of the rock. Luckily he’s got those sitar string fingers so it’s not a total loss. He got lucky this time.(edited)But of course with ANY of these men, they have space to improve. It all depends on time and communication.

[letters-from-the-three-houses]

GODDD I /LOVE/ your edelgard x dimitri stuff so much omfg... all this potential for tenderness and angst between these two is just so *chefs kiss* im shy but can i request a deeper look into what edelgard might like about dimitri (physical, personality, etc) i imagine being the heiress makes her a bit detached, and she never got to feel like a normal girl with a crush... let her love and my poor soft boy be appreciated

thank you!!!! i’m grateful for the praise, anon, but that explanation of yours is a chef’s kiss all to itself! claude would know and he would be entertained by it. in the original draft of the other post, i said he’d think of eddie/dimitri as his favourite source of melodrama, but i got rid of it bc it didn’t flow well with the rest of the hcs

this turned out to be longer than i expected (holy smokes), so thank goodness the read more finally works again

enjoy!

p.s. for those who don’t know yet, it’s currently my fourth favourite season of the year—midterm season—hence why the blog’s been running slow these days. i’ll be back to normal speed once the second week of july rolls around. so just in time for the two week countdown! i’ll still doing my best to work on requests in my spare time, but studying’s important and i’m going to get me some good grades 🕶️

edelgard’s initial impression of him was that he was much too like herself

with a slight frown and a straight stature, he looked regal, imposing, and dignified

calculating and cool, wary and doubting

she could see herself in him and it put her on her guard

so when she introduced herself for the first time, she made sure to act as aloof at possible

“i am edelgard von hresvelg,” she said, a hand on her chest as she bowed. “it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, prince dimitri”

she expected him to do the same, a well-practiced propriety that only the heir of faerghus could have

so when he grinned, she froze

“well met,” he told her, genuity dripping from his voice. “but really, the honour is entirely mine. i’ve heard only the best things about you, and though i had no doubt they were true, your prowess against those bandits only solidified the claim”

it made her more uneasy than she’d admit, but she masked her discomfort with a passive expression

and during their entire trip to the monastery, she stole secret glances his way, still confused and trying to understand their interaction

whenever he caught her eye, he simply smiled and nodded at her

it was all so baffling

and it bugged her so much that when they were already in the academy, she continued her habit of studying him

she couldn’t understand how someone so…innocent could make it this far on their own

she got her answer one day when she found him laughing and joking around with his housemates

and realization clicked

there, she thought

he could act so open because he believed he had people he could trust to watch his back

and for a moment, all she felt was pity

it was foolish of him

naive

didn’t he know that putting too much faith in someone made it easier for them to stab you in the back?

whenever he was around, she couldn’t help but watch him—like she was waiting for a train wreck to happen

surely this would all fall apart

sooner or later, his so-called ‘friends’ would show their true selves and intentions

but no matter how long she waited, nothing happened

and she began to think

maybe

just maybe

his housemates really treated him like he hasn’t the prince of faerghus

but instead, like he has their equal

like he was just…him

the idea was rather foreign to her, but if she was being fully honest, it was intriguing

she still thought it was unwise

but she was curious to know how it was possible

was it something about dimitri in particular? or was it perhaps because the people in faerghus were just more trusting in nature?

she wondered what it’d be like if adrestia was like that

(and at that, she shook her head and forced herself to turn away)

(nonsense; that line of thinking would surely get her into trouble)

(and yet, she couldn’t help but sneak another glance, watching the way his face brightened when he laughed)

because of interest, or perhaps habit—what else would it be?—she continued studying his every move and mannerism

whenever she talked with him, she memorized his expressions

in an argument, his brows pinched together as he frowned, showing every crease and wrinkle of disagreement

when he was taken aback, pale skin giving way to a warm blush, he stuttered and stumbled on his words

when she quipped a joke, rare as it was, his eyes shone in awe, mouth slightly ajar, before he schooled his features into a smile

it was hard to look away from

and the image of him, light and happy, would remain at the forefront of her mind for the rest of the day

from then on, she sometimes daydreamed about him

reimagining the emotions that would flit on his face

and how, even if he’d try to hide them, they would bleed through with his bad acting

how he’d try to pretend he hadn’t just jumped five feet in the air in surprise

or how he’d clear his throat to divert the attention from his reddening ears

she’d breathe out a laugh before realizing what she was doing, and she’d snap out of it to redirect her thoughts elsewhere

it didn’t stop people from noticing

whenever she was in that mood, staring out into space with a pensive look, hubert would ask, “my lady, are you alright?”

and she’d jolt back to her senses, replying with a “most certainly” before going back to her book

or petra would look on, quizzical at edelgard’s constant sighing, and say, “distraction by something, lady edelgard?”

“no,” she’d say after a moment’s pause. “it’s nothing. sorry, petra, what were you saying about practice?”

it was rather subtle, but the moments and slip ups compounded as the days went on, and the eagles were all worried about what was happening

they finally realized what it was during one of the house tournaments

usually, when the match was against the deer, edelgard would study her housemate’s every move, noting any mistakes and areas for improvement that she’d touch upon later

but when it was against the lions, their leader seemed almost…expectant?

even when the match was bernadetta vs. mercedes—and edelgard was taking careful consideration to make sure bernadetta got the encouragement she needed

her gaze would keep sliding over

so, following edelgard’s line of sight, they noticed she was looking at dimitri

dorothea gasped

caspar elbowed linhardt so hard he almost toppled over

hubert and petra blinked in realization

and ferdinand, disgusted, had a look on his face that said, ‘out of all the people she could have chosen, she chose him? seriously?’

but they watched in silence, eyes flitting back and forth between the two leaders

meanwhile, edelgard was unaware of what was going on behind her

and when bernadetta won, she stiffened as dimitri came over to relay his congratulations

he grinned, almost cheeky. “as expected from your members, edelgard. after all, they learn from the best”

she stared for a moment, a bubbly feeling rising up in her stomach, before she turned her gaze to the training grounds. “yes, quite. you’d best keep up lest you get left in the dust”

“of course. i suspect we’ll be training hard for the next few weeks.” he laughed and it was light, like cold air on a winter’s morning. “still, it’s no loss to lose to you”

her eyes flashed at that, ready to retort

was that an insult?

was he implying they were too insignificant to even be considered proper opponents?

but when she focused on him, she stopped, the argument dying on her lips

because once again, dimitri was staring at her with an earnestness that told her he had utmost faith in her abilities

again, he didn’t bother to hide the full extent of his feelings

but unlike the first time, it didn’t make her uncomfortable

instead, it made her feel…warm?

almost happy?

she softened, about to respond in kind when she realized what was happening

and she hardened her expression before clipping out, “then i suppose matches aren’t the only thing you’ll lose, if your pride has already slipped from you. farewell”

then she turned around, calling to her house to tell them they were leaving

(caspar almost screamed, “what are you doing?!” but linhardt clamped a hand over his mouth)

for the next few days, the eagles secretly monitored edelgard, noting the times when she stopped in her tracks to stare at something

or when her lips would twitch upwards

or when she’d look almost…longing

and they would find dimitri in the area

but whenever they tried to subtly talk about it—"so, have you been thinking about anyone lately?“—edelgard would look at them like she didn’t understand

finally, it dawned on them: he was her first crush

(ferdinand sighed and said it wasn’t worth the effort, but dorothea dragged him along anyway and told him it was for the greater good)

they began to be more overt, name dropping dimitri into conversations and saying good things about him

“he’s talented and smart. he gets top marks in his house, doesn’t he?”

“yeah. and he certainly doesn’t slack off in training”

“he’s also really considerate! just the other day, i saw him help someone who tripped and had all their books flying all over the place. when they tried to apologize to him, he said it was no trouble and even offered to carry some of their stuff to their next class”

“huh, he’s pretty cool”

edelgard would nod along, a smile playing on her face as she felt proud that people were acknowledging his strong qualities

one day, they asked back, “what do you think about him?”

and she stopped in her tracks, heart in staccato, as she simply said, “he’s much too nice for his own good”

too trusting

too honest

too expressive

she thought of his eyes, always crinkled at the corners when he looked at her

his voice, smooth and velvety, when he leaned over to speak in her ear

his awe, clear and evident, when he praised her for her hard work

it made her insides all warm and fuzzy, but she didn’t say that out loud

(it was hard for the others to really guess what she meant by that, though they supposed her wistful tone was answer enough)

and they continued upping their game so she could finally realize that she liked him as more than a friend

dorothea lent her some romance novels, making her listen to explanations of how wonderful it would be to fall in love, all the while ranting about the symptoms that edelgard herself had shown

“sneaking glances when you think they aren’t looking, holding your breath when they get too close to you, straightening your clothes when you see them at a distance—”

caspar would try to make her jealous by relaying gossip about the other people dimitri was close with

“his childhood friends must know a whole lot about him! do you think they have some embarrassing stories they can share?”

bernadetta, cooking way too many extra sweets, would say, “maybe you could give this to someone you know? there are too many to eat by myself…”

(edelgard shared it with the rest of her housemates first, then the professors, then claude, then dimitri, who gave her such a sweet smile in return that her skin turned warm)

(her housemates only shook their heads and sighed, but at least it was progress)

(and by this point, claude picked up the signals, sending the eagles a thumbs up in solidarity to tell them he’d do his part whenever he could)

it almost seemed hopeless, really, because edelgard just didn’t seem to understand her own feelings

but claude would have none of it

and instead of all the secretive mumbo jumbo, he went straight for the kill

“hey,” he whispered one day, after one of the interlord meetings, “do you like dimitri?”

she glanced at him, then the boy in question. her heart pattered at the word ‘like’. “of course i do. don’t you?”

“that’s not what i meant. i meant, you know—” he leaned in like he was going to tell her a secret, eyebrows wiggling all the while. “—romantically”

she almost choked. “what?”

the outburst caused dimitri to look at them, concerned, the question on his face asking, ‘are you okay?’

and she nodded at him, a bit embarrassed, before turning back to claude. “where did that come from?” she hissed under her breath

he chuckled. “don’t tell me you thought i didn’t notice. you sneak glances whenever you think he isn’t looking and you hang onto every word he says. it’s pretty obvious”

“what does that have to do with me liking him like…that?”

“um, because people who like someone act just like that? so you like him?”

“that’s…that’s nonsense”

he slung his arm over her shoulders. “oh come on, eddie—”

“don’t call me that”

“—i know you’re smarter than that. you’ve probably already figured it out but you just don’t want to admit it. ’course, i’d be bummed out myself if i found out i had a crush on our resident noodle boy—”

“don’t call him that”

he eyed her glare with amusement. “wow,” he chirped, “i knew it was bad, but i didn’t know it was this bad”

“is something the matter?” dimitri called from the other side. “the two of you have been whispering furiously to yourselves this past little while, and it’s showing no signs of stopping.” he frowned and tilted his head. “is it something i should know about?”

claude grinned. “yeah, definitely, we were talking about—”

“claude!”

“—the fine intricacies of human emotion. fascinating subject. very deep. the two of you should discuss it sometime”

then, with a wink and an exaggerated wave, he said “ciao!” and made a speedy getaway

whether it was because of the awkward conversation she just had or because of the fact that dimitri made his way to stand much too close to her, she couldn’t get the heat off of her face

“that was odd,” he said. “though to be fair, he’s always weird”

“quite,” she mumbled

he sent her a sheepish look. “i’ll apologize on his behalf”

“it’s not you who should be sorry. you don’t even know what you’re saying it for”

“yes, but it’s for the discomfort you felt. it’s not something i enjoy seeing on your face”

why was he so nice? claude’s words repeated over and over and over again

“thank you then.” she tried to keep her voice even. “i appreciate it”

he returned it with a soft smile. “it was the least i could do for you,” he told her, voice no louder than a murmur, and all she could do was curl her toes. “well, i best be going. i won’t be able to win against you if i idle around, yes?”

you don’t have to, she wanted to say. you could stay here with me

instead, she nodded. “of course.” and in spite of herself: “do try your best, dimitri, but i’m afraid the future is already set in stone”

it was playful, a rarity from her, and his eyes widened for a moment before he laughed. “then i suppose i’m unfortunate enough to attempt defying the fates.” he bowed, low, with only the deepest of respect in his stance. “until then, my lady”

when he left, her mind raced through all that had been said and done

from the moment she had laid eyes on him

to her growing fondness

to her housemate’s hints and claude’s words

to now, heart beating wildly against her chest

she couldn’t deny it any longer

she liked him

and for the first time in her life, within the quiet walls of a room she had all to herself

away from the eyes

away from the judgments

away from the adrestian throne

she let herself grin silly

a/n: dimitri is unknowingly smooth. but for everyone’s sake, do not tell him how smooth he is. because once you do, he becomes way too self-conscious about it and turns into a bumbling mess

[asks are open!]

[icharchivist]

(spoilers for every games in the ffvii franchises including the latest expansion and esp main game/end of CC spoilers)

and it’s me just rambling but i’m djhfjdlkfjdf

goddd just. just. god. like. 

Zack was one of the first character i’ve ever really Really Loved, like, crushed on, and playing CC is so heartbreaking and i know all of his scenes so much and all i still get filled with love everytime i see Zack.

and when the remake was announced it’s like. If it stuck to the OG, and with the announce of parts, i was just resigned about not seeing him for a long long while since his existence in the OG is a plottwist to start with. I was just hoping that once he will be mentioned they may just put more flashbacks from the CC time period, eventually something new in that, but i was so resigned and just. happy to be able to see him in HD.

but with the direction the remake took, full Alternative Universe wise, and the way it ended??? the fact we are getting new Zack’s scenes that we Don’t Expect?? that aren’t flashbacks??? that show us what he would have done if he hadn’t died on that hill that day???? 

Like. DECADES of imagining fix it of how he would react to the OG’s plot and. We’re actually getting it???? 

LIKE i still don’t know how i feel about the remake being an alternative timeline, like i admire the attempt and the direction of the plot but i am still picky about it being called a remake while it’s a new story all together and while i understand they don’t want to do a 1:1 remake i am kinda huh... disappointed is too strong of a word, but similar, to the fact that we’ll never have the OG plot in HD per se (unless once the “remake” is done they’ll do an “OG cut” dlc or something in which case y’know what i’ll forgive anything).

but. Zack being alive. Zack growing and evolving from the events that would have caused his death. Him being able to eventually reunite with the people he cares about. and Zack having NEW SCENES, NEW DEVELOPMENT, stuff we’ve only ever imagined in fanfictions!!! actually happening in canon!

like the latest spoilers are fucking me up so bad because we’re just. having NEW Zack content. NEW “Zack won’t die” content???? Like??? I feel so high. It’s a dream.

and again i’m so TORN because Zack’s death and disappearance is so important on Cloud’s character development and everything, but also like, i’ve never finished watching that playthrough of the remake (it makes me want to play it so bad and i just end up wanting to turn it off to play it instead but i don’t have this moneyyyyy....) so i’m still not sure how they’re dealing with the “Zack survived” plotline exactly (like i think (?) he’s not from the timeline we’re seeing with Cloud and the gang so the Cloud we see IS a Cloud who experienced Zack’s death, but what we follow with Zack is a whole other timeline completely, so we can have both Cloud “suffering from the grief from losing Zack” AND Cloud “being by Zack’s side” and all of that) so everytime i am just. whines.

but meanwhile Zack brain goes brr i’m just so happy to see NEW scenes of him being happy and alive in the very timeline i always wanted him to survive through!!! 

like holy shit for YEARS i was having dream fanfic scenarios of Zack surviving, i was especially using deepground for that bc like, there is a golden opportunity for a post-DOC event where GASPS everyone learn that Zack’s body has been retrieved and experimented on in deepground all that time and maybe he was in a vegetative state and/or brainwashed during all those years until he was found again by Cloud and the gang and LOOK. if not for the fact it doesn’t save Aerith i loved this idea. So like. I have had SO many thoughts about Zack Lives AU and now it’s a Canon Alternative AU EXCEPT Aerith may survive too??? like????

i really don’t know what to think of the remake bc my brain keeps going from “how the hell are they going to keep up with the canon thematic” and “WHO CARES THIS IS MY CANON FIX IT NOW” while also having the fear of “wait what if it’s not a fix it and they’re pretending they’re fixing it to hurt us again if they return to canon hold on”

BUT YEAH ALL I MEAN IS THAT i see Zack in the remake, living past the time he was supposed to die, being able to do the things he wanted to do before he died, i see NEW Zack’s scenes, and i cry. 

Zack was such a minor character in the OG that i remember some people not knowing his existence bc they failed to find the memory cutscene and didn’t remember the other scene...  and then between Last Order and Crisis Core people fell in love with him so much so he’s the most popular male ff character???? and like, deserved but???? crying???

and they saw that and they went “let’s not kill him this time. at least for now.”

and godd it reminds me of the fact before the remake came out Kitase (who, in another interview, expressed that he didn’t like Zack much (since he didn’t work on CC) and didn’t understand why people liked him so much),  did an interview saying “we know that people are expecting to see their fav characters like Cloud, Zack and Sephiroth, in all their glory again” and my brain went HAYWIRE then because, Kitase is a massive Sephiroth stan and said those things about Zack and yet??? he worded it like this??? and i was “what are they going to do with my one true love”

and i’m just. god. goddd. Like seeing those new Zack scenes are messing me up so bad. I’ve got into VIDEO GAMES all together because a friend forced me to sit through Zack’s death and i cried SO HARD i had to play the game and this is what Made Me a Gamer, and Zack my beloved <3. Since 2007/2008 i live with this scene haunting all of my thoughts... Constantly having to remember it, crying over it again.... the fact the url i used for the longest time before this one was a reference to his dying moments and his relationship with Cloud and his dream.... Years where i just, come back into ffvii every once in a while and cry because, Zack, amn’t i right.

And it’s. messing me up so bad how this one new scene of Zack is making me go completely haywire.

add to the fact that the remake is making me lose it because it really develops my precious girls more and more too but like, at least this i was prepared for!! i didn’t expect them to give us this much tenderness between them but at least i did expect them to further their development since they’re main characters... I was prepared (lies i watched 7 hours of playthrough and cried everytime Aerith was on screen because i love her so much and it hurts so much).

but i was not prepared for NEW ZACK CONTENT. in 2007/2008 when i joined, the Zack content was done with... except for like his cameos in spinoffs, i’m talking canon storyline. since 2007/2008 i’ve been living with all those memories of all of Zack’s content..... 

and now we’re getting new Zack content. All new. brand original. Canon content for part of the stories we could only ever fantasize about. 

unparalleled media experience actually.

anyway seeing this Zack scene in the expension going around is messing me up so bad i’m akjdhflkdjf??? 

my love.