#and yes mcr would be mcr either way

[awsugar]

@mulkadesa exactly!!! exactly, i think this was something i was like tapping in to when i made this post but i was too sleep deprived to really get there. but exactly, like the time period is part of the reason those things will never happen again. a huge reason. but i guess the other thing that makes it soooo crazy to me! is that that time period obviously existed and like cooked these three things in such a concentrated and unique broth. to make them this way. and to make them so unique. but like that time period EXISTED! and yet it didn't cook up anything that quite matches the engaging allure and specificity and sometimes tragedy that is destiel and frerard and phan.....and people can try to argue with me about including frerard in this list but you're wrong. YOURE wrong. even ryden is probably real but it's it as prolific? no one gaf about ryden anymore. everyone knows larry is crazy. and despite all of the hemming and hawing of teenagers on the internet ALLLL of the adult mcr fans i know just KNOW that there is something to it (frerard) like. even if it's just franks emotional torment.

so like i'm just saying yes like the time period of like gay becoming mildly ok but also like the strong armed homophobia of general society created some very unique things BUT. you would just think that since that's the case that there would be more instances but there's not. like not to the scale that these are. this IS the supernatural my chemical romance fan and phil website. literally always has been.

i can't sleep my brain and body have been all fucked up this week and i'm laying here at 430 being so PLAGUED by the fact that my life's 3 main hyper fixations have been mcr spn and dnp and not only that but the fact that fiction as a whole will never have anything like destiel again, the internet will never reproduce something like phan. celebrities will NEVER be able to do frerard again. i'm not insane. these are the big 3 and not just because these are my favorite things. there are endless amounts of ships and pairings and fics and lore but literally. the specific experience of living through all of these in one lifetime. no one else will ever have that...except us

[wonysugar]

hate rodrigo (literally) | aeri uchinaga

a/n: this is not even a fic this is a tiny little one shot that i wrote yesterday night AT LIKE TWO AM due to thoughts we had in a discord server ahem anyways I FELL ASLEEP THO. soo have this now!!

genre : really bad crack smut like i genuinely have no idea how to describe this

word count : like 600 something?

tags : one shot, smut (obvs), crack, ptv mention, falling in reverse mention, olivia Rodrigo mention, mcr mention, taylor swift mention (sorry @pupyuj)

pairing : angsty!giselle x whitegirlmusic!femreader (I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO LABEL THISSFJEKF)

your music taste wasn’t something you particularly shared with people, but you didn’t hide it, either. to you, it was music, nothing more, nothing less.

however, one of your friends, aeri, took music very, very seriously, and it really showed. she had a certain aesthetic, she wore certain things and god, did she listen to certain music.

“no like i genuinely can’t grasp the fact that you unironically listen to olivia rodrigo?” she laughed, leaning back on her bed as you stared at her in disbelief.

“god aeri, some of her songs are good, you just haven’t tried them.” you snapped back, wearing a convinced smile as you proceed to jokingly hit her arm.

“okay, sure, whatever. but just imagine getting to know someone, going on dates with them, all the sha-bang. then, when it’s time to get down and freaky, they turn on their sex playlist and motherfucking driver’s license starts playing??”

she was basically cackling at that point and you couldn’t do anything to stop it. defending your cause seemed like it would’ve been difficult, with how far up her own ass she was.

“yeah, because that isn’t a sex song? olivia rodrigo doesn’t make fucking sex music?? try putting a falling in reverse song while you get naked, see how that works out for you.” you fight back.

“oh i don’t know about you, but i’d be soaked for sure. plus, anything would be better than hearing young adult women sing about their previous relationship like it was a war they fought in.” she kid, crossing her arms in victory, as if she even won the argument in the first place.

“i’m gonna make you swallow those words right back up, uchinaga.”

“try me, l/n.”

-

“f-fuck y/n, go- mmh- slower..”

so, it wasn’t supposed to happen this way!

it originally was just the both of you, taking turns and putting different songs on the bluetooth speaker and rating them based on ‘how wet it got you’.

turns out, while that was a theory stage, there seemed to be a practice one too, and you’ve been in it for the past 10 minutes now.

thrusting your fake cock in and out of her, paying no mind to the very loud, very obnoxious pierce the veil song that was playing in the background, you pinned her hands above her head. your pace increased with time, and the decibels of her voice increased with the pace.

“oh my god y/n pleasepleasepleasepleasee i’m s-so sorry i- fuck me- i didn’t mean-“ she cried, poor thing probably didn’t even realize that her black eyeliner was running all over her cheeks. her arms and legs wrapped around you,

“shut your fucking mouth and take it, you emo fucking cumslut.” you slammed your strap into her as she yelled out your name. while she was pleading and begging for something, you were on top of her perfect laying-in-mcr-bedsheets body.

she, herself, wasn’t aware of what she was begging for, her mind was completely blank. all she could think about was how good her pussy felt when you pounded it so violently, when you were being so aggressive with her that you just used her body however you wanted.

you thought that whole thing would be a one-time occurrence, but no, it happened a second time, when she said that taylor swift had mid music. was she doing it on purpose or something?

anyways,

yes, you fucked her with the 1989 album playing.

[insert-stupid-username]

Ranking drivers based on how badly I want be there friend. Dont hate yall this is soley for fun:

Max Verstappen: I feel like he would enjoy the random tik toks I send him, also I think we would have so much fun playing minecraft and I want to introduce him to the sims. also I really want to be able to send him the really bad f1 POV's on tik tok, like the funny joke ones where the drivers say pookie and baby girl every single line and it ends with kimi or oscar going I am here also

Lewis Hamilton: Roscoe. I want to meet and play with Roscoe so bad. Thats like the main reason. My side reason is so I can ask him so many questions about brosadies. Also wouldnt it be hilarius to find and send like nico rosberg edits...OR HAMILTON EDITS TO HAMILTON

Alex Albon: his animals. I think he would be a good freind to have and that he would care and listen but I REALLY love animals so the main reason I want to be friends with him is for his pets

Charles Leclerc: leo leclerc. that dog is amazing. Also if Im friends with Charles that means I can become frineds with Alexandra. Like she is so amazing and I want to be her friend so bad. If i have to go through charles I would.

Liam Lawson: I want to watch cars with him and also share my realisation that there was a cars 9/11 and cars mcr and cars twilight and cars fanfic and cars fifty shades. I know this all becasue in cars 2 there was TSA and TSA was created becasue of 9/11 I feel like he would either be horriffied or delighted that cars smut exsit both smut of the cars in the movie and smut in the cars universe. (side note but wtf would that even be like?) (if you want more cars implications let me know I WILL go down the rabbit hole) I just want him to thinkabout the implications (yes this was all realised at a very VERY late night strike a few years ago)

Carlos Sainz: I feel like if I tried to have one deep convo with him he would no longer be attractive to me. I dont even like the dude but holy hell he has some attractive moments where I forget that I dont like him

Oscar Piastri: I want to meet lily. Also I think based on the few irl freinds I have that we would get pretty good. Also I want to show him the sims, I think he would be a nice person to rant about my fixations to

Logan Sargeant: I like swimming and like tubbing, I think it would be fun to convince him to try and kill me while tubbing. Given the fact that he does race fast cars I bet he would drive a boat fast and fun ESSPECIALLY when I want to get dumped in the water. Also I feel like he would like he would have some fun random opions on things. like have you met frat guys? there so hit or miss but when they are hit they HIT

Yuki Tsunoda: I want to swear with him. I think it would be fun. Immagioning the stuff we could get up to sounds like so much fun

Franco Colapinto: Dude being friends with this guy would either help my celeberty crush or hurt it. he flirts with EVERYONE which can be so fun, but like if he flirted with me even as a joke it would be so awkward.

George Russell: I just want to see how long hell last until he gets too annoyed and leaves

Lance Stroll: I want to see how long I last before I say something rude and a tiny bit mean, cause if anyone can push my buttons in a way that gets me talking its rich people. even if they are nice rich people I still get annoyed

Zhou Guanyu: he seems like a nice lad but Im not sure what we would talk about

Daniel Ricciardo: I want to know EVERYTHING I feel like I could get him to spill so much info, but also that shouldnt be a reason to be friends with people cause thats not nice

Valtteri Bottas: I would like to introduce him to martial arts than sit back cause I will either laugh or be impressed

Fernando Alonso: I want to know how long I could go before I want to punch him

Checo: How long could I resist the urdge to start yelling and storm out the room

Nico Hulkenberg: I cant think of anything good or bad he just reminds me of my father

Esteban Ocon: I dont know why but I think we just wouldnt get along

Kevin Magnussen: again he reminds me of my father. Nico and Kevin are like the same person different fonts to me

Pierre Gasly: I think I would try and punch him too much, like all the f1 videos hes in I just find him pretenshus and a bit rude

Lando Norris: I just dont like this man. Everything he says gets on my nervs. The only reason he is not booted from my list is cause I think SOME of his friends seem like people I could mabye get along with

We have discovered that I really like animals and want to be friends with most of the drivers soley to pet there pets and send them annoying tik toks

[runningfreetoday]

“When We Were Young Fest is a cash grab!” - If you think this, I can’t wait for you to find out about other festivals because that’s pretty much how they all work. They get your money, you get your money’s worth. Festival money (which is not an insignificant amount of money) helps bankroll bands so that they can live and keep making cool shit instead of having to do only “real” jobs forever (you would be surprised by how many musicians from major emo bands have had to get normal-people jobs when they’re not on tour. some even left bands because they can no longer afford to be in them). Sadly, a lot of people in this scene are covertly kinda broke. MCR doesn’t appear to be scrounging between couch cushions for loose change so I don’t think they need this gig to live but either way, doing this festival was their choice. I’m slightly surprised MCR agreed to the one album play-through concept because they’ve never been the type to do an anniversary tour for a specific era before (the original self-imposed cash grab) but I think it’s clear that no one’s forced them to be at WWWY (twice!). Fall Out Boy’s there and they’re not limiting themselves to one album. So again, MCR chose to do things this way. I’ll be honest, more of often than not, I think old album-centric performances and tours can cheapen a band’s image and stunt growth by not focusing on building interest for new material BUT My Chem fans are obsessive, hyped about new material, and many never got to see My Chemical Romance on The Black Parade tour. In this specific case, the actual artistic choice of doing one single album as a one-off thing at a festival is kind of a win for MCR fans rather than the actual band. Personally, I don’t totally hate the idea of being able to experience the vibe of that era in 2024 and, because it’s MCR, I’m sure they’ll do something a little different with it. Anyway, I might be in the minority but I wouldn’t even go so far as to call festivals a necessary evil. Festivals are fun! Your high horse will not save you from the inevitable heat death of the universe! Enjoy things before it’s all over!

“MCR made fun of WWWY Fest therefore they HATE WWWY Fest” - You can poke fun at something without actually hating said thing. I know that you all know this in your hearts because y’all make fun of your favorite bands all the time. Yes, When We Were Young Fest is a name that grounds these bands in “the past” which might feel a little silly when much of the community are new fans, when older fans are still actively listening to these bands, when these bands are still making new music, etc. Ultimately, the branding is about nostalgia. I hear the frustration with that but consider that the reason you keep consuming emo music, a genre that you more than likely began listening to in middle school or high school, is not totally detached from that sense of nostalgia either.

[loverboy-havocboy]

infodump at me about aliit au tattoos? please?

kissing you on the mouth about this, if i may. long post ahead, i imagine.

starting with comet:

starry night tattoo - comet is a painter and his favorite artist/main stylistic inspiration is van gogh. i think this is one of the first real tattoos boost did after beginning his apprenticeship in keldabe

honeycomb - this is the testosterone symbol! it's also a matching tattoo with his ori'vod thorn, who was (likely) the first other transmasc he ever met and whose non profit helped pay for comet's top surgery.

art is the weapon - a reference mcr's danger days album and a quote by either frank or gerard: art is the weapon, your imagination is the ammunition, stay dirty and stay dangerous, create and destroy as you see fit. i think that speaks to comet both as an artist and as a queer person, and i think the whole pack is insane about mcr. boost probably gave him this one in high school.

trans symbol - this commemorates his first hrt injection! boost did the injection and the tattoo a week after comet turned 18.

phoenix - this is a huge part of comet's character, and is done in out of the ashes. it's a cover up that helped him let go of an abusive relationship and reminds him of what he's capable of. it's also dedicated to/inspired by @brokenphoenix99, who's been around for comet since day one.

cowboy star - sinker gave him this tattoo under boost's very careful supervision!!

flowers - suggested by phoenix when i didn't like his old chest tattoo, these accentuate his scars rather than distract from them. they're something he's very proud of, so that makes much more sense for him. the flowers represent growth, new beginnings, and him finding the comfort in himself he needed to embrace his femininity. the butterfly is for change/transition.

pack tattoos (dog, sun moon stars, swords) - i'd say all of these are probably from high school if not very soon after. the wrist tattoo was the first tattoo any of them ever got and the first boost ever did. it was a stick and poke and they were around 14-16. sinker's given name means sun ray, boost has always been caught in his orbit (yes, we're excluding earth for this metaphor) and is the more quiet/reserved, so has always been his moon. idk yet when comet chose his name or whether he was already their star at the time, but this became Their Thing. the dog is because they were so rabid/feral in high school (and because comet drew blood biting another kid in a fight) that they were dubbed a pack of wild animals/dogs. they took that and ran with it, calling themselves a pack. the swords are an all for one and one for all kind of deal.

i am creation & lightning bug - i am creation is a lyric from creature by half alive which is transgender To Me. the lightning bug was just cute and comet likes bugs.

sinker:

moths: obligatory sun and moon tattoo to symbolize him and boost. these were really fun to do, i just feel like he's a moth tattoo kind of guy, you know?

darasuum: mando'a for eternal/eternity. this is in boost's handwriting, over his heart.

snake: much like with the moths, he just gives me snake man vibes? i think he likes snakes a lot, as he's a friend to all creatures. the snake has a pattern of suns, moons, and stars.

hip star: i think comet probably did this one! either way, it's dedicated to him.

baby/doll: boost calls him babydoll sometimes. they both have other partners (mostly hook ups for boost, sinker goes on a lot more dates/has other relationships), but babydoll is something just for them. the baby tattoo spends a lot of time under collars (or boost's hands).

others: he's got a lot of random ones because he's been boost's practice body for almost a decade!

boost:

his tattoos would need their own fucking post, and some of them can be explained by comet and sinker's, so i'm just gonna hit a few.

dinosaur: sinker did this one!

"i'm here" star: comet did this tattoo! i'm gonna say maybe in high school.

lighter: "ni partayli gar darasuum" is mando'a for "i remember you, so you are eternal", which is part of the mandalorian death remembrance. this is a memorial for his parents. they died right before the pack started high school, and he was adopted by sinker's parents, who were already his godparents.

molotov cocktail: lyric from baby, i'm an anarchist by against me.

tic tac toe board: this is for sinker to play with when he's board. sometimes boost plays with him, sometimes comet.

gregor:

tallies: coric gives him a new one every time he does something stupidly risky that lands him in medical (which gregor generally just considers victory tallies, much to the medic's chagrin).

212: for his battalion!

bicep tattoo: foxtrot squad symbol framed by the words "jatnese be jatnese", mando'a for "best of the best". i'm gonna say his whole squad probably has this one!

[darkurgetrash]

Get to Know Me Tag ~

Hiya! I got tagged in a few different 'get to know me' tags so I thought I'd just combine them here, hehe. Thank you so so much to @dutifullylazybread @weaveandwood @orangekittyenergy and @blackstaff-blast — I really love these tags, both answering and reading others'. What can I say? I'm a gemini.

No pressure tags! ~ @lemonsrosesandlavender @savriea @graysparrowao3 @heytheresunflower

Do you make your bed?: Yes! I'm not a neat-freak, but I consider myself quite neat

Favourite number: When I was a young child someone asked me this and I didn't know what to say so I pretended it was '86'. Since then, that's always just been what I've said… couldn't tell you why lol

What's your job?: Between roles atm, but usually a copywriter

If you could go back to school, would you?: For sure. I was really let down as a kid by the system, if I could go back but with the wisdom I have now, I would love to. As for further education, I loved my undergrad but I can't see myself realistically studying more on account of chronic illnesses

Can you parallel park / Can you drive a manual car?: Nope. I was good at parking and driving back when I was first learning over 10 years ago but never took my test because I got a lot of anxiety driving. I live in London now, so there's no urgent need to learn, but I will have to some day.

Do you think aliens are real?: Yes. Ain't no way we're the only life forms to exist in the whole universe, pleaseee

What's your guilty pleasure?: I love Britney Spears 💁‍♀️

Tattoos?: A small one, on my ankle. Two hands in a reference to Twin Peaks. I also just love the design — even if my tattoo artist did a slightly shoddy job and told me they did the exact same reference on tonnes of people ayyy lmao

Favourite type of music?: Easy answer is indie, though even that is a huuuuge umbrella. Some of my fave musicians are Mitski, Bright Eyes, AURORA, Radiohead, EELS, and Thumpasaurus. Also, a long-time MCR fan.

Do you like puzzles?: I'm wayyy too ADHD for them tbh but I don't mind some types of puzzles, like in video games. But even then, they can't go on for too long, lol

Any phobias?: Crowds are def my biggest one. I’m scared of pretty normal things I’d say, like hornets. I do have a lot of sensory issues though that give a similar feeling, the most unusual being cardboard. Do NOT touch it near me, I WILL scream. And slight trypophobia… 🤢

Favourite childhood sport: Always hated sports and exercise, even as a kid

Do you talk to yourself: I sing to myself (and in general) a lot and have big echolalia, but I don't really talk to myself in the traditional sense. Now my partner on the other hand… he does not stop yapping for even a second in the day.

What movie(s) do you adore?: The immediate go-to's in my brain are The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Pride and Prejudice (2005), Your Name, and… Shrek. Non-ironically.

Coffee or tea: Earl grey tea with oat milk, please! If not an option, I'll go for an oat milk mocha.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?: I… okay. I don't even know if I should admit this, but it's kinda funny… but remember, I was a CHILD. like, FIVE. My sister wanted to move to Africa and be a mango farmer (???) and I wanted to go with her so I said I wanted to sell shoes there because I saw a gap in the market. 😭😭

Last song I listened to: No You Girls - Franz Ferdinand

Favourite colour: Lavender

Favourite flavour: Depends on what it is, but most likely either chocolate or strawberry

Current obsession: BG3, if y'all couldn't guess. 😂

Last thing I googled: 'Sacrum'. Girly doesn’t know what body parts are called.

Favourite season: Late autumn

Skill I'd like to learn: I'd looove to be able to sew and make clothes but I am the most cack-handed person you will ever meet. I literally got kicked out of textiles class when I was in school because I was so bad they thought I was messing about on purpose 😬…

Best advice: Be cringe, be free. People will either not care or think you're cool for your authenticity.

Currently watching: I don't really watch TV! Still getting through Dungeon Meshi, lol

Currently reading: I've been trying to read 'Interview with a Vampire' since the start of the year, but my brain only has room for BG3 fanfic it would seem… SO, here's a list of my current bookmarks hehe. Special shout-outs to @lemonsrosesandlavender @crystal-overdrive @ghostcouncil @weaveandwood @sinelaborenihilsr2 @dutifullylazybread @notlikeparis

Relationship status: Been in a relationship since 2016! Also, taken by Gale Dekarios in my head. 💜

Sweet/savoury/spicy: Big, BIG sweet tooth.

[wonderbutch]

genres and bands i listen to and how i got into them: an entirely too long useless list i made instead of sleeping

celtic punk

shoutout to the genre ever? i grew up listening to celtic punk literally since i was born. my dad sucks but his music taste does not. this genre is 32% responsible for my leftist punk attitude, which is ironic if you know anything about my father.

- the dropkick murphys: first band i can ever remember hearing. as a toddler i called them “the bastards”. still a favourite forever and everrr. their newish album “this machine still kills fascists” fucks HARD. the band will forever be a formative reminder of my working class upbringing in a miners family

- the rumjacks: late nights and early mornings in my dads car introduced me to this band. i really will tell me ma when i get home and i wont feel guilty about it

- paddy and the rats: one of the only celtic punk bands i actually discovered on my own. in 2018 i went on a sailing ship for a week and that got me rlly into celtic punk again LMAO. this band is so fucking good

emo/pop punk

i was 13 and tbh it was a phase but i still love listening to fob and mcr and sws

- my chemical romance: unironically i think i got into them through band memes

- fall out boy: literally just thru scrolling through youtube when i was 12

- [REDACTED]: [REDACTED]

- sleeping with sirens: this band shaped me as a person. kellin quinn the original gender envy. ohhh i miss this band sm

- all time low: a kid in my class in year 7 introduced me to all time low and ill remember him forever for it. hope youre well, jaiden.

- la dispute: got to see them live last year after @starcam413 got me into them! theyre kinda more screamo like sws but not in the same way as sws but definitely emo too

- set it off: this band is still SO GOOD. so fucking good oh my god. truly the fucking era

- the score: i was a greek mythology nerd as a kid (its my major now!) of course i listened to the score. i miss being 13 and listening to the score on youtube on my laptop at 3am so bad

folk punk

celtic punk and folk punk are very related, and i grew up listening to bands like the pogues and the violent femmes. is it really any wonder how i ended up Like This

- the violent femmes: as a child my dad would play country death song in the car. yes i am mentally ill and have daddy issues can you blame me????? (the song is literally about killing your daughter and then offing yourself)

- toby foster: really one of my proper introductions to the genre and what ultimately led me to discover bands like ajj and pat the bunny. found him on youtube through his song tennessee. i was 13 i think?

- pat the bunny: after toby foster i was completely hooked on the genre and of course ended up listening to the king himself, pat the bunny. your heart is a muscle the size of your fist is such a comfort song to me even now. it sucks he no longer makes music but im very happy he got sober!

- schmekel: im trans and punk of course i listen to schmekel. fantastic trans and jewish band that helped me a lot with my transness as a young teen

- mal blum: im counting his music as folk punkish, sue me. no idea how i got into them either. their song new years eve is the song i listen to on repeat every single new years eve, and i have yet to change this tradition. Help Me.

- the front bottoms: I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS. THEIR EARLIER ALBUMS ARE FOLK PUNK AS HELL. genuinely my favourite band ever. i can’t remember how i got into them but is how i ended up friends with @starcam413 (hi jon!)

- she/her/hers: sooo formative to me when i was 15/16 struggling with being trans.

- harley poe: ohh i love this guy so fucking much. why do i relate so much to a middle aged divorced man????

- days n daze: one of the most popular folk punk bands so i mean. Duh. sooo good i love them.

punk

- the sex pistols: listen. listen to me LISTEN TO ME. LISTEN. i dont even fucking like this band. in fact i despise it. but because my dad is an idiot, he loves this band and played it a lot when i was a kid.

- the queers: i think i heard them on a spotify playlist last year? big fan.

- the muslims: i believe this was recommended to me on reddit?? amazing black and brown queer band, i love it a lot

- tribe 8: im a lesbian with a complicated gender identity of course i listen to tribe 8. trans queer punk band that i listened to a lot when i was like 15 i think

- against me!: listened to them a lot when i was 15

new wave/post punk

got into this genre in 2022 and Hella into it late last year. blame paper girls brainrot.

- devo: got into them in 2022 thanks to an online friend hi ira 🌀 theyve never made a single bad song

- the cure: once again my dad showed me a lot of the cure when i was a kid and getting into music

- blondie: ….have you seen the batman and harley quinn movie….please dont make me say more. the first cassette in my collection is from this band!

- new order: one of my favourite bands right now. like most things for the last three years of my life, i got into this band because of a comic book. the tv adaption of paper girls features two new order songs and it got me absolutely hooked on this band.

rock/all that shit??

- danzig: once again you can blame paper girls for this

- bon jovi: also paper girls. i am obsessed with jon bon jovi’s hair in the 90s. gender envy as fuck

- queen: when i was 14 i found my grandpas mp3 player from the 2000s, he was a big fan of queen. i ended up putting all my music on the mp3 player and ive used it every single day since.

- billy joel: i was raised by my grandmother of course i listened to billy joel. played a lot on our old radio with my nans ipod when i was a kid. apparently my nan isnt even a big fan of him so i guess he was only formative to me lol????

indie

probably one of my most listened to genres just because. i have no reason. ive come to realise that most of my indie music taste is stolen from aura.

- girl in red: shoutout to discovering im a lesbian in 2017/2018 and to my best friend @vampoholica for introducing me to girl in red

- bastille: i love bastille sm icarus is such a good song and as a greek mythology kid i was so obsessed. bad blood youll always be famous to me

- mitski: oguhfhgh i dont know how i got into mitski but good lord. literally life changing.

- the smiths: fuck morrissey. i think this too was aura’s fault and i forgive them bc i love the smiths

- chloe moriondo: ahh the youtube ukulele era how i miss you

- alex g: i can’t remember how i got into alex g but i got into his music in 2022 and now im obsessed and unwell about him

- adrienne lenker: again this is aura’s fault and i am so fine with that. music sooo devastating it makes u wanna throw up and sleep forever

- elliott smith: i started listening to him because of simon vs the homo sapiens agenda

okay thats it thank u for reading this stupid post lol

[joanofarcisdead]

ok i changed my mind. i'm gonna make this a real post. as much as i’m hesitant, i'm writing this as someone with LIVING family members who either directly witnessed japanese imperial war crimes or were part of resistance to japanese imperial occupation, i want those of you in mcr fandom who are not part of those diasporas would take some time to step back and ask yourself if what you are doing is not directly reproducing the exact behavior you claim to be working against.

informative posts are great, but when you situate yourself as one of the primary authorities/speakers on or even THE primary authority/speaker on the violence that is reproduced through fetishizing the imagery of the imperial japanese flag, that does not allow for people in these diasporas to speak for ourselves. that does not uplift our voices. that re-centers your own voices, voices that are not directly shaped by the violence of japanese occupation. 

yes, white people need to be willing to show up for Black and brown and Indigenous folks in fandom, but after a certain point, it becomes a re-centering of whiteness generally and a speaking over of those voices directly effected by any reproduction of violence specifically. so maybe before making a post reiterating the problems of the imperial japanese flag, take a step back and ask yourself why YOUR voice, a voice not shaped by the generational traumatic inheritances of imperial terror, needs to be the one that declares how bad the imperial japanese flag and does the speaking on it. maybe ask why YOU need to be the one doing the “educating��� over anyone else. 

maybe instead of centering your own voices, you can just circulate information about the terrors of japanese occupation and the problems of the rising sun motif, written by folks in southeast and east asian diasporas. this, after all, has been an issue for years and it is no way restricted to the mcr fandom--and so bloggers have written about this for years. 

maybe support folks from southeast and east asian diasporas who are in/were in the scene by listening to their music instead of nebulously saying that we exist and are being harmed, but not acknowledging that we’ve always been here and actually make things (shocker). aye nako and beabadoobee might even be a start. 

sometimes actually showing up for us (or any community that is directly being harmed) means changing behavior to do things that are less visible, but idk maybe it’s the long haul of allies actually learning to change their behavior that has the most material impact on those of us living in the long shadow of imperial violence

[3m0n3rd]

Atuff abt my turtlez that I wrote on a discord sever once but changed sum stuff

Tw for rap3 and abus3

okay so Lee/Leo goes by she/him- shes REALLY masculine physically but like he wants to dress up and act pretty a lot of the time. Leo is (and I'm debating this) bisexual or saphic! Lee has Anorexia and PTSD. She really tries to be an older sibling like RISE! Lee tries be there and present, trying to make his siblings forget about their childhood so that everyone is just happy! which doesn't really work... But again he is just trying her best. -- Lee's love life is wonky, before Usagi came, he was in LOVE with karai and soon started dating her. But when Usagi came, Leo started to feel some stuff but not strong enough for him to leave Karai. So he's always felt shitty about hurting yuichi because he's a dear friend to her. I feel like his VA would be like Pearl from steven universe or something like that.

donnie is like the one who I heavily based off of my but still gave them their own personality uh they/them (and sometimes He/him) Bro is t4t and bisexual and nonbinary. So Don boy is rlly emo.. But like most of the other four, they don't really dress up since no one is there to see them. BUT many ppl don't know this abt donnie but the spike choker he wears, they only wear it around Arrow, if they wear their googles that means their in their lab. But if they aren't wearing those accessories their just hanging with their bros. Donnie has AFRID, OCD, and schizophrenia. Which this causes a lot of difficulties in his life. Arrow in his mind Is their savior, basically their nothing without them. So Donnie tries to change everything about them to make Arrow like them more. ex. He says their fave artist is ICP, Arrow's fave duo. But in truth his fave band is MCR. I think Don's VA would be 2012 Donnie in some sorts of dib from Invader zim.

Mikey is so kawai-chan from aphmau, yes call me cringe idc. any but mostly he/him. Mike in the earlier seasons would be straight, until he realizes he's asexual!! But other then that, HES SCENE!!!! but again like everyone else he doesn't rlly dress up. Unless he wants to. Mikey loves april! their like BFF's for life! Fun silly fact, Mike was originally was suppose to HATE April, but later I got into the 'moon and sun' duo more. Oh mike has adhd, autism and dyslexia. Mikey is really the glue to their family much like in RISE!. So he tries to keep everyone happy like Lee. Mikey has never really told ANYONE this but while splinter never hurt Mike when he was younger, he treated him as the favorite child because occasionally he would ||Rape him.|| Which didn't effect Mike that much because he just blocked it out of his memeory. Mike's VA would DEFFINATLY be something like honey senpai dub from Ouran High school host club or like Beast Boy from Teen Titans Go!

I hate raph/hj. I really just don't know how to feel abt him because he reminds me of me a the most, in the worst ways too. okay he/him and ally! but later become poly and bi with Casey and Mona Lisa. (this was because I REALLY couldn't decide who he should end up with lol) Raph is basically a dick half the time and not in the way people like. He's easily irritated, makes fun of others for no reason, and will just hurt someone cuz he wants to. But deep down he tries his best, he just hates that everyone can act okay with what happened while they were kids. - Raph has PTSD, anger issues and autism - Lee was the one who got hurt most of the time, Raph was the one who was hurt the worst once. Splinter straight up put BOILING water on him because he wouldn't stop picking on Mkey. (this also leads to Raph being very distant from Mikey) So a way to relieve his PTSD is to just either hit shit really hard or just sleep with the million stuffed animals around him. Idk wut his VA would be, maybe Damon Salvatore from the vampire diaries or smth like that

[ashpkat]

i’m making a personal first gen hc post bc i’ve been thinking of TDOJ and my own fic for a lil bit so

- declan and constantine did not get along at the trials and continued to not get along until mid copper year when constantine became a makar

- they didn’t get along because declan + sarah did not come from much; their father physically wasn’t there and their mother wasn’t mentally there and they didn’t have much money. because of this, to him constantine and jericho were nothing but stuck up prissy kids that could and would walk all over declan.

- but why constantine specifically and not jericho? because constantine has trouble with a little concept called empathy. and it took constantine becoming a makar and seeing that money and status couldn’t protect him forever for him to finally develop some empathy.

- sarah was alastair’s first friend ever. alastair felt very out of place on his apprentice group, he was the only person who was a pair of twins and also didn’t score nearly as high as the other four.

- for extra classes/ “electives”, sarah and alastair took up metal magic together.

- yes i know canon says constantine was “charming” and stuff, but consider: jericho being the more popular twin (it’s cause he isn’t two faced and is real)

- declan punk rocker is REAL

- declan gets jericho into a lot of punk rock stuff, which pisses constantine off to his wits end because him and jerichos room is RIGHT next to eachother and the music bleeds through.

- he also annoys the shit out of constantine by singing 21st century digital boy (bad religion). and it actually makes constantine like the song. it’s catchy!

- sarah and her brother are outwardly very similar. but in reality, they have very few things in common.

- sarah loves michael jackson, celine dion, kate bush, the works— these bands declan cannot STAND and it causes arguments .

- constantine ends up running a Real (not cave food) Food black market. how does he get his hands on so much outside world food? because after he becomes a makar, master joseph brings him protein bars n such and eventually constantine is able to weasel his way into getting any type of food from him

- exterior wise, constantine is the most calm and collected. interior wise, he is not. if there is every a person to NOT get in a screaming match with, it’s him. he will win.

- sarah falls first but alastair falls harder

- in my eyes, constantine is either aro or gay— no in between

- other students air magic the fresh prince of bel air in the gallery and it’s the one thing the whole apprentice group can agree on watching

- rest in peace declan novak you would’ve loved Step Brothers (2008) and probably MCR

- constantine is convinced by jericho (+declan) to split dye his hair his natural brown and bleached blond.

- eliza hates it. she’s not able to properly color match his natural brown and doesn’t want to spend time nor energy going to the salon to fix it, so she makes constantine bleach all his hair

- declan and sarah hadnt properly celebrated their birthday in years till they came to the Magisterium. it was alastair and constantine who planned the party together

- because wasn’t that a thing? in the books? constantine and alastair were canonically best friends and closest? i think master rufus said it in either book 1 or 2

- anyway

- best friend shenanigans with alastair and constantine lead to one-sided alastine (on constantine’s half)

- Constantine made a chaos ridden wolf to cheer Jericho up after makar lessons became too draining on him. it became an emotional support dog for the whole apprentice group (master joseph ends up killing it in the name of science)

[sometimesiammybpd]

this one is a rough one to talk about. that's how i'm gonna start this.

i've only ever been in one real relationship. i had no luck in high school and to be fair, my method was pestering people over and over again until they usually stopped talking to me. safe to say it didn't work out all that well. it also was the aforementioned "toxic era" which to me says that even if i had gotten lucky enough to have someone date me, i probably would have been extremely emotionally abusive at the time because in hindsight, i was to a lot of my friends. so unlike most, i'm grateful to not have dated anyone in high school because i just . . . didn't know myself and wasn't ready to change. and putting that on someone like it's their responsibility now would not have been okay. and yeah, it sucked at the time because i was so unwilling to accept i was in the wrong at any point that i believed there was no genuine reason for people to not want to go out with me. and of course, i was always wrong. like so badly wrong it's not funny. either way, that's how it was until the end of senior year for me. that's when i met my now ex. we're gonna call him nathan for the sake of the post because this isn't going to be me shitting all over him and i don't want to leak his info anyways.

nathan and i met through an instagram comment section of all things. i don't remember the specifics outside of us talking because i thought he seemed cool. neither one of us thought it'd ever go anywhere and i honestly never even saw us being friends for that long as it was. except that we kinda just hit it off from the start. the usual awkwardness was there at first, but i mean it was smooth sailing. and then i realized i liked him. with bpd, it was pretty early on for me and he did NOT like me back. at all. but, this was still in the point of time where i never let it go until i got an answer and i effectively pressured him into saying yes the first time. i didn't know this until later because nathan told me himself. i still am so mad at myself for doing this and trust me when i say, i wish we could go back to before either one of us ever crossed paths with the other. for his sake more than mine. we only lasted a week after he said yes because of a big reason. up to this point, nathan and i talked all the time and i knew things about them that they didn't tell anyone else. obviously would not reveal any of those even if it was to save my own life. but the important detail here is for reasons i will not say, nathan was not comfortable with sex to a point he had ptsd because of it. i have to also make it clear that he did NOT ever get an official diagnosis, at least as of when we last spoke. it's briefly important now but becomes unfortunately really important later.

so, we broke up after a week. nathan wanted to show me that he trusted me and offered to spend the night at my house, which was a fucking huge thing for him. i said i'd like that and we made plans for that friday that he'd come and sleep over. he'd take my bed upstairs and i'd sleep on the couch because i did really want him to feel okay and comfortable. for most of the relationship's life span (all four times we dated, not just the first), i never even saw him sexually. i never had sexual attraction because he was not comfortable with it and all that mattered to me was that i liked him romantically and he kinda seemed to feel the same way. anyways, the friday comes and we go to the mall first as a date. that part was fun and fine. we went to hot topic and i got my first ever MCR shirts. still wear the hell out of the basic fan "black parade" shirt. and then we went to my place. the mall went fine. the drive went fine. but once we were alone in my mom's apartment, he shut down because of the ptsd. i knew something was wrong immediately because he fell silent instantly and froze up. after ten minutes, maaaaaybe a little bit more(?), i asked him "do you want to go home?" and of course he did. so i took him home. i felt so bad for him and he kinda came out of it at the very tail end of the drive when we were by his house, but it was clear he had shut down mentally and there wasn't really anything i could do. i was 18 here and on the drive home, i cried my eyes out. i felt really bad for him but i was also afraid he was going to want to break up. it was one of the worst days of my and i'm sure his life. when i got home, i messaged him on insta saying we should break up and we did. and i ended up falling into my worst habit at that time and writing a bunch of cryptic posts that were clearly directed towards him but i wouldn't say it to him. and the next day, he texts me telling me that he couldn't forgive me because i manipulated him and turned his ptsd into my issue. that's how breakup one ended.

before i go into anything else, this is how i'm gonna handle this post. everything i just told you was past me. that's how it was for me in the moment. present me sees it differently. i don't think i could have helped the crying because it really did freak me out. but everything after? i so wish i could undo. it was not okay for me to tell him i cried, or tell him we should break up, or write the posts that i did. i don't actually know if i mentioned the "telling him i cried" thing above but that was also a big part of it. i did make his ptsd about me and i don't excuse that. i really don't. i don't even think we should have dated because i really did pressure him into going out with me and he didn't even like me at the time. i thought he did but he didn't. and he made that clear later on because all of this kept coming back up.

there then was in-between time where i did spend a lot of it trying to repair what i damaged or broke after that day. and i meant everything i was doing. i didn't want to lose him because he was the most important person in my life for over a year. but eventually nathan said he'd give me a second chance and we started dating again for the second time. the key difference this time was he actually liked me back. and it was fine for a while. this one lasted almost seven months. his love language was insults and nothing else and i took it because i really did love him. i was also so infatuated with the idea of being in a relationship that i didn't care that we had nothing in common and all of that shit. this is not me dragging him either. it's just that we really were never compatible.

nathan had a lot of issues from things that happened that were not his fault. but it fucked him up and he didn't want to deal with it. his main coping mechanism was drinking and smoking weed. mainly drinking. and i don't mean he'd get drunk every night. he'd be drunk by morning. he'd be drunk all day and night but would only drink more as the day went on. and i ignored it for a long time because i didn't want to upset him. he didn't really ever take the issue of his alcoholism lightly. mainly because he didn't want to admit he was one. anyways, that's not the point. we broke up twice during this period. i say four times in total because it was, but i considered both of these to be the second time because i don't remember us staying broken up with for all that long after the second time into the unofficial third. to explain why we broke up the second time, i have to explain one other very important thing about him.

without further details or context i refuse to give because it's not my story to tell, nathan did not like people touching him especially in a romantic way. hugging, kissing, all that stuff. and i knew this. i have always been a physical attraction = love kinda person, so it wasn't easy but in the end i didn't care because i just wanted to be with him. and when we broke up the second time, it was after we saw sonic two. we had talked about us holding hands because it was the one thing he was okay with doing. the day of, i made sure of it and then went to go get him because nathan couldn't drive. and when he gets into my car, he reveals that he doesn't want to because he's germophobic. this one is harder to talk about because i was in the wrong for being mad at him for saying no. but at the same time, i was told over and over that yeah we can. it was the one thing i thought we could do, physical attraction wise. i never had my first kiss at this point. i had never hugged someone outside of my family or held hands with anyone. and y'know, it was exciting for me. but when he told me this, i kinda just shut off. we watched the movie and then on the drive home, i was so pissed that we broke it off either that night or the day after.

our timeline is so messy that i don't remember when this happened but we had another break up (pretty sure this was the unofficial third one). this one was weird. i had severe anxiety and insecurity issues during this and with undiagnosed bpd, it only got worse. i had a habit of apologizing for nothing, except for one time. i had sent a text before going to bed and after he was asleep that read something like

"i'm sorry i'm not a good girlfriend. i'm really sorry i'm not good enough for you.... and a bunch of other shit i don't remember."

and i went to sleep. i woke up to paragraphs up on paragraphs of messages from him. nathan kinda just laid it all out there. he told me i had been making him upset for months, but that he didn't want to tell me or upset me. so he ran to his friends behind my back and was venting for months which led them to say to him that i was a "manipulative, abusive piece of shit." honestly, i still don't know if they were right about that or not. but i remember him ending all of this. paragraphs and paragraphs of soul-crushing shit with "don't worry, i won't break up with you." i almost didn't respond because i didn't know what i was supposed to say. i pretty much had assumed up to that point that everything was fine and it wasn't. i kinda lost myself at that point and a certain friend of mine could easily recall the conversation that followed the receiving of those messages. i ended it that time.

the real third time we dated, it was... the worst time. because at this point, i was losing feelings for him. and this time, he initiated it. this is really the point it all went to hell. somehow, i made him comfortable enough to want to try and have sex again. although, i'll explain in a bit what he told me about how he wanted it to go down. it was not okay. it started with him sending me a series of nudes and led to him asking if i'd be okay having sex with him. i had no feelings for him and a lot of my feelings that still existed were mostly frustration. but i said yes. and i want to make this clear: originally, i did NOT say yes because i was sexually attracted to him. i was so used to doing whatever i could to help him and this was a big deal for him. i had no intention of doing this because i just wanted to lay him. and this is where my biggest issue came in that i honestly didn't even know i had at the time.

a big thing that comes with most people who have bpd is something called hypersexuality. if you don't know what that is, basically it's like a sex addiction. when you're horny, it's all you can think about to the point that most people with bpd will go out of their way to get sex even if it means putting themselves in horrific situations that could get them hurt, killed, given an std, whatever. and for me, i have come to learn that with mine especially, once someone introduces sex into the relationship, i literally cannot view it the same no matter how hard i try. cause all i can think about is the sex. and most if not all of the time, i'm NOT sexually attracted to whoever it is. i rarely get down peoples where i'm repulsed by it which is also what happens with people with hypersexuality. and it fucking sucks. it makes things so difficult and drives people away. i want to go into this more in its own post, but that's what's important for this. and one more very important thing: me knowing this doesn't excuse what i did then. and no. it's not what you're thinking most likely.

so nathan wanted to warm up by sending nudes. getting comfortable showing me his body, i guess. and i was at first saying fine because he said it helped and that's all i cared about. but then the hypersexuality started to take over and all i started to want was the sex. i was still not sexually attracted to him. i never was. i know that sounds like it makes no sense or isn't really the truth, but it is. it happens so much more than i want to admit. so he kept sending nudes except that i started to ask for a lot. he told me at first that i could ask for some. and because all that stuck in my head was sex, i asked him for a lot and the worst part for me that i did to him was basically only talk to him for it. the explanation is that i started to seriously resent him because for over a year at this point, all i felt like i did was take care of him and basically try to fix him myself. and it wasn't like he didn't lean into it himself which only solidified that that had to be my purpose in the relationship. it's why i said yeah initially to him asking if we could fuck. it's why he wanted to date the final time because he told me himself that it made him feel better about it than if we were just friends. we never had sex and i never forced him to have sex with me. i need to make that clear. i would fucking never and i don't take that shit lightly. but i went way too insane with the nudes and i made him severely uncomfortable and kind of didn't realize it ever. he had to tell me when it was beyond too late to stay friends that it made things worse. but besides all of that, the way it ended is all i remember.

and before i say that, i want to tell you what he wanted in order for him to be okay with us having sex. i couldn't ask if he was comfortable or if what i was doing was okay. he told me he'd immediately shut down once we got into it and i had to basically just . . . go through it with it anyways. he told me he wouldn't be speaking and i kind of had to r-word him basically. i'm not even kidding. this stuff i don't remember agreeing to because it came after the initial "would you have sex with me" question. because it made me severely uncomfortable for him to unironically say i'd basically be r-wording him but somehow it was okay.

this entire thing makes me . . . really uncomfortable to relive. uhm, so, uh. i wanted to take him to kings island. we both were not the biggest fan of roller coasters, but i thought we could ride some of the smaller ones together. i thought it'd be sweet. and i feel like if i didn't miscommunicate things, it would have been. because i do remember telling him he didn't have to ride rides if he didn't want to. i meant to say the real rides as they're called. rides like diamondback, vertigo, the beast. not shit like shake, raddle, and roll (which is a contained ride where you go in circles until it slows down. it's fun and only lasts like five minutes, give or take). that day, i asked my best friend at the time to come with me and him. i knew it wouldn't end well and yeah, it didn't. he agreed to and we went to go get nathan. the ride there was fine, but after we got him, it wasn't. nathan had an abusive father, so any signs of anger shut him down and a particularly stupid mother fucker got me to scream for a second because he didn't know what he was doing and almost got us killed. actually. nathan freaked out thinking i was going to hit him and i had to calm him down. the rest of the day was a $200+ waste of money (i paid for both his ticket and mine). from the getgo, it was clear he wouldn't even try the effective kid (or "all ages" depending on who you ask) rides. it made me so angry because at the time especially, i thought i had communicated it well and didn't get it. in hindsight, i could have done it better. infinitely better. but i don't excuse him letting me buy him a ticket just for him to not effectively using it. every time we went on a ride, he'd sit on the curb like a child in timeout and it just . . . yeah. after two rides and a meal, we left because i couldn't do it anymore. i still remember him asking me if i was mad at him when we were leaving. this is another "i don't really know who's at fault" one or if there is even a right answer for that.

there's more that happened after we broke up, but i wrote the stuff regarding sex last and i don't like to think about that. because i don't like how bad i was then. how desperate and how i treated him. because i apologized a million times, but it does a lick of shit. and i didn't deserve for him to accept the apology anyways. i still don't and i don't want him to. in his story, even if i never crossed that line physically, i did with the nudes. i made him feel like he couldn't say no and i will never be able to undo that.

the overall point of sharing all this because for all the stuff he did do in return, to me, nothing comes close to our final time together and the way i acted. and it's something i think about every day and something i probably will til the end of my life. i have brought this up in therapy and the hypersexuality. it's one of the things i am trying so hard to understand and control since i can't afford medication. but i have nothing since then but try and change and stop myself from ever doing that again to someone else.

there's no positive message for this one. so, uh, yeah.

[jerseymuppet]

i might be stupid but. is the gothamverse a muppets batman au? is that what the thing in ur bio means? (either way plz do tell me abt it)

That would definitely be infinitely cooler than my idea! Gothamverse is the beautiful result of me playing arkham knight while waiting for an mcr livestream to start up and thinking ‘damn bitches from jersey are fucking insane! ....wait a minute’

It’s basically a silly little idea I came up last March with where all the mcr guys are from Gotham and what their villain origin stories would be etc. I followed the main Batman villain archetypes: extremist, anti-hero, camp, and serial killer, and I had a fucking blast! It’s very silly and just something I did for fun. I guess I can go a lil bit into it here.

full disclosure, I am psychotic and disabled and I do not believe in the vilification of mental illness or disability in media, all of these characters will eventually get the help they need. Batman at its core is about a mentally ill man helping others who have been failed by society and I will never forgive dc for making him into an overpowered, glorified cop.

Frank’s character (Francis ‘Frankie’ Stein) is the extremist (duh). He’s the son of a mafia boss who is steadily ruining their town with crime and Frankie just kinda snaps and kills him to take his place as the head of the family and try to undo some of the damage done. He has great intentions, he’s just very unyielding and kind of insane 💕 his moniker is Frankenstein! And his whole schtick is that he’s very hard (if not impossible) to kill. He’s also chronically ill and Jewish, these are not important to his character but they are important to me !

Mikey’s character (Micheal Way) is the serial killer. He’s a ‘sociopath’ (theres nothing actually wrong with him, people just suck and made him feel lesser and out of place :/) trying to fit in with everyday society but he always feels like something is missing and becomes a neuroscientist to try to find what exactly it is. He invents a machine (the empathsizer) that allows him to experience other people’s memories and emotions as though they are his own. From there he accidentally gets addicted to the chemical responses his brain has to doing that. And keeps doing it. Even after the testing phase is no longer accepting applicants. It gets worse after he experiences someone’s near death experience and starts chasing the high it gave him. Idk what his moniker is? It’s sandman for right now but that’s honestly so boring and uninspired.

Ray’s character (Raymond Ortiz) is camp but very loosely. He’s an engineer by day and a rockstar by night! He’s really only an engineer to save up enough money to pursue music full time but it’s hard because he doesn’t get paid that much. Winter hits and with it, cuts to his hours! So he’s forced to choose between rent and electricity. When he gets really sick as a result, he can’t afford a doctor. And when he wakes up with his hearing gone as a result, theres nothing he can really do but spiral into a depression. Until he realizes he’s a literal biological engineer. If he can’t fix his problem he can at the very least prevent it from happening to someone else! Research does cost money, so it’s very fortunate that Gotham has so many banks. His moniker is Dr. Megahurtz! His weapon of choice is his guitar, which has been retrofitted with sonic emitters to amplify and weaponize the hertz. Not enough to hurt, but enough to incapacitate.

Gerard’s character (Jules Moss) is the anti hero! She’s (yes I made Gerard’s character a trans girl, they took too long to make a trans character so I did it for them) has the same backstory as Gerard actually! On her way home from work she witnesses a terrorist attack, but instead of starting a band she decides to fight crime instead. She does so bad. Literally her first night out patrolling she gets killed by some priest who’s been driven insane by what he claims is an angel that’s ‘chosen him to impart gods will’ but it’s just a fallen star looking for a vessel to possess and the first guy it came across wasn’t dead lol. The star turns into a sword of pure light and that’s what Jules gets stabbed with, but also it fuses itself to her dna so she wakes up a few days later, schrödingers girl, with some scary new abilities and a voice in her head that definitely wasn’t there before. Her whole arc is her trying to find the guy that killed her and get revenge. Her moniker is stigmata! Because when she gets impaled it also goes through the palms of her hands and the wounds don’t heal.

but yeah that’s the bare bones of it all! I’m planning on making this into a comic series but the script is still being written at the moment! Thank you for letting me ramble about it 💕🥰

[m00ngbin]

hey......... itd be a real shame if you started ranting about the demolition lovers and the stories and lore behind the mcr albums.........................

OH MY GOD YES IT WOULD BE. SUCH A SHAME.

Ok so everyone already knows that mcr like originally started in September of 2001 because Gerard Way and his brother Mikey Way were living in New Jersey when the twin towers fell and Gerard saw it happen because allegedly he was meeting with Cartoon Network executives about a cartoon idea he had and he was like "this was super traumatizing I'm going to start a band where I can vent everything out through songs." (Great idea)

So he starts the band with his brother, (bass), Ray Toro, (main guitarist and backup vocalist), and Matt Pelisser, (drummer), (mainly Matt Pelisser), and in 2002 they release their first album, (MY FAVORITE), I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. (Eventually Frank Iero, (backup vocalist and rhythm guitarist), joins the band but he wasn't there when they formed. He WAS featured on two songs in Bullets though, Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For Both Of Us and Early Sunsets Over Monroeville).

The first song they ever wrote, Skylines and Turnstiles, is about Gerard's feelings about 9/11. It's technically the seventh track on the album but yk. STILL THE FIRST.

Most of Bullets is ab the band members' lives growing up and their experiences watching 9/11 but it's also where they start coming up with the storyline for the Demolition Lovers. ANRJSHEKRJ I LOVE THE DEMOLITION LOVERS

Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge/Demolition Lovers

Ok so the Demolition Lovers storyline is a little confusing and mostly up for interpretation. MY interpretation is that in the song Demolition Lovers, (from the Bullets album), the Lovers are running away from unknown people in the middle of a desert, where they're both shot.

The Demolition Man dies and goes to hell, while the Demolition woman ends up in a coma. (I THINK SHES IN A COMA BC OF THE DRAWING IN THE LINER ART FOR REVENGE WHERE SHES IN THE HOSPITAL).

Then the Revenge album picks up where Bullets left off and we learn that the Demolition Man is told by the devil that if he goes back to earth and kills 1000 evil men he'll be allowed to see the Demolition Woman again.

Of course the Demolition Man is so desperate to see the Demolition Woman again that he says yes, so he goes back to Earth and Give 'Em Hell, Kid starts the story.

He starts in New Orleans and takes a train to an unspecified other place to begin the task. He's really remorseful about it, but he gets super drugged up to stay awake while he finds these 1000 evil men. Atp the Demolition Woman starts feeling kind of abandoned bc I guess she never realized that he had died and she has no clue what he's doing.

The next song, I'm Not Okay, is supposed to touch on how the Demolition Lovers' relationship was kind of toxic and ALLEGEDLY this was originally supposed to be the last song on the album, where it ends with the Demo Man's suicide. Obviously we knew that the Demo Lovers didn't have the most stable relationship but this song was supposed to highlight how bad it was

In the song Ghost Of You, the Demo Man starts reflecting on his actions and how much he misses the Demo Woman. At this point he's worrying that either he won't be able to kill enough people or he'll just never be able to see her again.

Jetset starts with the Demo Man finally getting out of jail and finding a new partner for his killing spree. She wants the relationship to be more, but the Demo Man is still hung up on the Demo Woman. (Obviously, if he wasn't he wouldn't be doing all of this.) Both the Demo Man and the partner are addicted to drugs at this point, the Demo Man mainly so that he can stay awake and cope with what he's doing.

In Hang 'Em High he starts doubting that he can go through with killing all of these people and starts thinking that if he fails, the Demo Woman should go on without him. In Fashion Statement/Deathwish, he regains his confidence and gets much closer to his goal. He realizes though, that even if he does succeed death will eventually bring the Lovers apart again.

In between Fashion Statement/Deathwish and Cemetery Drive the Demolition Woman gets out of the hospital and kills herself. (Helena doesn't technically fit with most of the story but I like to think that it's the Demo Man going to her funeral).

In Cemetery Drive the Demolition Man visits her grave and finally gets to 999 evil men. It's at this point that he realizes that he's been tricked by the devil. He'd killed 999 evil men, but since the devil made him a murderer, he was the 1000th.

In For A Living the Demo Man accepts that he'll never be able to see the Demo Woman again and kills himself. He finally reaches 1000 evil souls and so he actually IS able to reunite with the Demolition Woman in hell.

ARKAHSGFJS. I LOVE THE DEMOLITION LOVERS STORY SO MUCH YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I LOSE MY MIND THINKING ABOUT THEM EVERY DAY. Also like. Disclaimer you don't want a relation like the Demolition Lovers had. I didn't get super into it but their shit was FUCKED UP. Every time I see someone say that they wish they and their bf are just like the demo lovers I have a "hm." moment bc like. Did you even listen to ANY of the songs mentioning them?? Did you read ab their lore?? Do you know ANYTHING about them???

I'm not a gatekeeper or anything I swear I just don't think people should be saying that they want a relationship just like that

OH I TOTALLY FORGOT, during the Bullets tour era Gerard had a faux leather jacket that he wore so often and didn't wash that it literally disintegrated because of his sweat. I think most people know that but what they don't know is that there were TWO leather jackets that he disintegrated. One of them completely fell apart and the other one just lost one of the arms

THE BLACK PARADE

Ok listen I love the back parade but I'm not going to say AS much about it bc I spent most of my time hyperfixated on the Demo Lovers story and Danger Days so I don't know everything. (REMEMBER EVERYTHING I SAY IS AN INTERPRETATION DONT YELL AT ME IF YOU THINK SOMETHING ELSE)

Ok so the album starts with The End, where we learn about The Patient. He's dying and he probably won't be missed, and we get a reflection of his life and his fear of dying.

In Dead!, we learn about The Patient's diagnosis and prognosis. He has cancer and he doesn't have very long to live, maybe two weeks at the MOST. The first verse of the song, ("Did you get what you deserve? The ending of your life," (not said by him)), suggests that maybe The Patient is kind of a piece of shit and he deserves to die. The Patient is deep in denial atp, he's refusing to acknowledge that he's dying but he also wants it to be over.

This Is How I Disappear has The Patient reach out to a past lover, letting them know that they'll be the only one to remember him, and he begs them to keep his memory alive. It's mentioned again that this guy has done horrible things, but we still don't know what yet.

In The Sharpest Lives, we see The Patient start trying to distract himself from his imminent death by partying and drinking. He wrecks what's left of his life and it ends up dragging other people down with him.

After this song, he sobers up and goes to the hospital, where the rest of the album takes place

WTTBP is where he starts reflecting on his life again and accepts that his life is about to be over. Death comes, but in the form of his favorite memory: a parade The Patient's dad had taken him to when he was younger. The Patient's dad had told him that he wanted him to grow up to be a good person, (whoops), and that he can't be by The Patient's side forever.

I Don't Love You has The Patient desperately trying to break off his relationship with his current partner. He knows that his death will be painful for both of them and he doesn't want his partner to have to watch him rot away. (He's being selfless?? Shocker)

In House Of Wolves we get a description of how he sees hell, where he knows he'll end up. Despite everything he doesn't want to burn for eternity. He knows he's a bad person, but he spends the song INSISTING that a lot of people aren't better than him. (Dude🧍)

In Cancer, now that his treatment has started, he feels ashamed of how the chemo is making him look. His hair is falling out, his lips are chapped and faded, he's pale and gaunt, etc etc. He looks like shit pretty much. He already feels dead. He starts thinking selflessly again, trying to say goodbye to his loved ones in a short heartfelt way so that it doesn't have to be long and drawn out and painful. He doesn't want to leave them behind but yk. Life's not fair and he knows it.

Mama FINALLY gives us what he did, and guess what it is. War crimes. He was involved in a war where he committed terrible acts. Things so bad that even his own mother rejects and disowns him. At the point he's at in Mama, he decides to write her a letter where he admits that he's a terrible man and a terrible son, and since he's dying he would like it if they could reconcile and talk.

In Sleep The Patient says that he doesn't regret what he's done, but he wants to leave it all behind and end his life on a high note.

Teenagers is a song that doesn't really fit with the rest of the album, and I'm pretty sure Gerard Way says that it's not the most relevant to the story. There's a couple lines about how The Patient was an outcast in highschool, but most of the song is ab the system trying to control kids and get them to conform.

In Disenchanted, his life starts flashing before his eyes and he reviews it like a movie. He gets really disappointed about his life and how it's ending. He talks about how he could have changed things and that honestly his life was pretty worthless bc he just waited for death.

In Famous Last Words, The Patient is supposedly talking to a loved one, but he's not sure if he's dreaming it bc he doesn't know if he's dead or alive atp. Either way he has accepted that he's dead or about to be and he's at peace with it. (Or as at peace with dying of cancer as you can be)

NOW HERES WHERE IT GETS SUPER INTERESTING. THERES A SPLIT ENDING. Blood is the one that Gerard Way considers the ACTUAL ending, but they also wrote Heaven Help Us as an alternative ending that's technically just as correct as Blood

In Blood, The Patient chooses to stay alive, even though he knows that there's no way he's going to get better. The doctors and nurses that are taking care of him pity him and are only keeping him around for the money.

In Heaven Help Us, he DOES end up dying. Atp he's waiting in purgatory for the verdict on whether he's going to heaven or hell (it's going to be hell)

YAYY BLACK PARADE DONE

Danger Days

AKDOFHADORN OK SO THE STORY LINE FOR DANGER DAYS IS KIND OF CONFUSING BC THERES THREE: THE ONE FOR THE ALBUM, THE ONE FOR THE MUSIC VIDEOS, AND THE ONE FOR THE COMICS

DID YOU KNOW THAT GERARD WAY IS A COMIC BOOK ARTIST AND AUTHOR TOO?? HE WROTE A COMIC BOOK FOR DANGER DAYS AND HE MADE UMBRELLA ACADEMY AND PENI PARKER IN THE SPIDERVERSE MOVIES

So in the album, the first half basically talks about fighting in the desert and recalling the events of the Helium wars (The Only Hope For Me is You). Pretty upbeat.

Then in the middle of the album (Traffic Report) Jet Star and Kobra Kid are apparently killed, leaving Party Poison and Fun Ghoul alive?

The second half of the album deals with more serious themes of sacrifice, the "message", desperation, and, (obviously), sticking it to the man. Vampire Money is the only track set in the "real world," which gets proven by the use of their real names in the opening.

The EP, The Mad Gear and Missle Kid, contains three songs by this fictional band that the Killjoys would have listened to while driving around. The three songs on it are: 1. sex with porno-droids, 2. hooking up with older men in punk clubs, and 3. makes a reference to drinking juice while killing, which is what Val Velocity says in the comic. She might have been copying Party Poison but idk.

In the music videos, (Na Na Na and Sing), the Fabulous Killjoys run around the desert with The Girl, killing dracs. Korse eventually catches up to them and there is a shootout where the Killjoys get stunned and The Girl gets kidnapped.

Then the Killjoys go on a suicide mission into Battery City to try and get her back. They find The Girl who has been held by The Director and fight to escape. During the fight, Party Poison realizes that there are actually people under the drac masks, (one is implied to be Cherri Cola, who was played by Jimmy Urine (ew)), and he freaks the fuck out.

Korse kills him first, and the other three are also killed while trying to escape. The Girl is rescued, (by DJ Hot Chimp? I think?), and goes back out to the desert.

The Killjoys are wrapped up in body bags, but there was supposed to be another music video after Sing (which was cut due to budget issues), and Gerard mentioned in an interview once that he thought the Killjoys never really die because they would sort of spontaneously regenerate like in a video game or something.

There are three parts to the comics. The first is about The Girl, and reveals that the reason the Killjoys protected her was that they believed she was like a messiah. The Killjoys are all long dead by now. This group of teenagers, the Ultra V's, has decided to model themselves after the Killjoys, and the story talks about The Girl's interactions with them and coming to terms with her destiny. It's a coming of age type thing.

The second part talks about two android prostitutes from Battery City, and how they escape.

The third part has Korse as the main character, and reveals that he is gay and he has to hide this from Battery City officials. It's mainly ab him trying to get freedom and escape as well.

The Foundations Of Decay

NEWEST MCR SONG OMFG. It came out in 2022 following MCR's 6-7 year hiatus and URGAHDHFJS ITS SO GOOD. From just the lyrics

"He was there the day the towers fell

And so he wandered down the road

And we would all build towers of our own

Only to watch the roots corrode"

I think at least that part is about Gerard and a callback to why he started the band in the first place.

The whole song is kind of about the band and their history and everything and URGAJHDHFISSH I love this song so much you don't understand. It's very reminiscent of the Bullets era but it's a lot more mature I think.

NOW FOR MY FAVORITE SONG EVER OF ALL TIME: OUR LADY OF SORROWS

Our Lady Of Sorrows is on the Bullets album and it's the best song from any era imo. It's about how far someone will go for their friends and it's a really aggressive way of basically saying that you would die for someone and that you would stand with them against anything.

The song was originally a demo called Bring Me More Knives, and it only had Gerard, Ray, and Matt playing on it. Allegedly Mikey loved the song so much that he managed to teach himself to play the bass decently enough in four days just to join the band and play it.

Some of the demos from (mainly) the Bullets era were called the Attic Demos because they were recorded in the Matt's attic

Matt got kicked out of MCR in 2004, (just after the Revenge album came out), because apparently he was caught stealing. He was replaced by Bob Bryar, and currently Jarrod Alexander is the drummer for MCR

Oh I feel like I should mention that nothing was glamorous ab any of the tours or the band members while they were touring before the hiatus. These were like traumatized 20 something year olds touring the country and doing drugs and becoming alcoholics and it pisses me off so badly when people try to make that era seem so great. There was an entire chunk of the Life On The Murder Scene documentary about Gerard Way struggling with alcoholism and how his hygiene was so bad bc he couldn't take care of himself. That's part of what that jacket disintegrated. Ofc it was also bc touring is disgusting and you don't get a lot of chances to shower and stuff but nothing ab any of that is glamorous

Oh but they're all a lot better now I think. Obviously I don't KNOW bc idk any of the band members but from what I've seen they all at least look better

[gerardpilled]

have you seen that twitter is convinced mcr is breaking up again lol

Yes lol and from what I’ve seen it’s entirely based on a “hasitleaked” account tweeting that they have mcr news that isn’t good. Even if that account was accurate, I saw another rumor saying mcr dropped out of a latam tour so that could be the bad news? Either way I’m not worried about it. I would rather them break up if they thought it was for the best.

[sigynpenniman]

does anyone else genuinely wonder how on earth Gerard disappears so completely for such a long stretch of time. Like YES I understand they’re not as recognizable as they used to be. However. I see approximately 3 people a week in MCR shirts. About 10% of those are return tour shirts and a further 30% or so are at least aware of the return tour or went to a show(s). And not everyone who would at least recognize them is a big enough fan to wear a shirt. And not every fan is wearing a shirt every day. So let’s do some simple math and assume if Gerard goes out in public a normal person amount they’re probably running into about 2-3 people a week who would theoretically recognize them as they currently appear. Even if they’re wearing sunglasses or whatever their speaking voice is also INCREDIBLY distinctive. and yeah okay maybe they’re turning down all requests for autographs or photos but do you think we wouldn’t hear about THAT? Like no matter how much it is their right (which it is) there would INEVITABLY be an asshole or three who want to RUN to the internet screaming I MET GERARD WAY AND HE WAS AN ASS. Even if they take photos with people ask them not to post them not everyone is going to listen. SOMEONE is going to disrespect that eventually. and there’s. Nothing. For months. months and months at the time. Gerard Way is one of the more recognizable people on earth and they are better at hiding than your average most wanted list fugitive. Either they literally never ever leave their house (seems unlikely and impractical?) or they’re on some hiding in plain sight shit you’ve never even conceived of bc I cannot wrap my head around how they can move through the world, security or no security, whether they’re talking to fans or straight up turning them down, and leave literally no trace whatsoever

[loverlylight]

So, I had an idea and wanted to see if it would be something people would be interested in; a Richard Maxwell relationship dynamic tournament. Not only because Richard Maxwell's one of my favorite characters of all time, but he has so many intricate and interesting relationships I thought it would be fun to find out the opinions of the greater Odyssey fandom on the subject. A few thoughts about this idea:

1. This would not be a romantic relationship tournament. While some of the relationships you could interpret as either romantic or platonic, this is meant to extend to all kinds of relationships; romantic, familial, friendly, positive, negative, you name it.

2. While anyone can of course vote any way for whatever reason they like, the initial intention is more for how compelling you find the dynamic versus how good/healthy/positive the dynamic is. Richard might have a healthier relationship with Joe than with Osgood, but his relationship with Osgood might be considered more interesting (unless you're super invested in Richard's relationship with Joe, which hey, that's totally fine!)

3. I'm only included characters who have directly interacted with Richard in canon (and I am counting the books as canon). As much as I love the idea of Richard meeting Edwin or Tasha or Buck, that would both get too unwieldy and not have an existing dynamic to go off of.

4. For the logistics of the tournament itself, I'm thinking of a 24-seed tournament, with a three-way poll for the semi-finals and a four-way poll for third place. I'm also thinking of having each poll last a week, since with the size of the fandom I think only one day could cause people to miss it. I'd also make a side blog for this, in case people would like to follow the tournament account but don't want to deal with dozens of MCR pictures.

So yeah! I'm adding a poll here to gauge interest, since I feel like even if I'd like to do this in any case, if only three people wanted to participate I don't know how fun it'd be for you guys. If you have any questions or suggestions, please let me know! And apologies for the wordiness.