#and yes I am playing as Nadya

[rainwingmarvel7]

Y’all I caved and finally downloaded Game of Thrones: Conquest and it’s actually… kinda fun?! Reminds me of a game I used to play as a kid.

Anyways, if anyone wants to join in my quest to conquer Westeros, lmk…

[minato-division01]

Results!

It's now time to reveal who's the most popular member of Oculus! Truthfully, we would have released this earlier in the week, but, as usual, life got in the way, so we decided to just wait until now, when the anniversary is over.

But anyway, here are the results! The fan favorite for Minato Division's Oculus is...

Aika Yumi!

She led the majority of the race throughout the entire week, earning five votes with Nadya getting one, and Meari having none.

We're happy to see Aika is so popular by many of her fans! Truthfully, she's exactly what we had in mind when we created her. A large part of her personality and character is based off of Jessie Maye from Huniepop (If you haven't played it, we highly recommend it), so we're glad we did her justice. Although, we are a little shocked that Meari didn't get any votes, whilst Nadya got one. As much as we like Nadya, we definitely have more fun writing with Meari cause its easy to memorize what she is going to say and do, whilst with Nadya we have a little more trouble.

But in any case, thank you to all who participated in the poll. We truly appreciate it.

Meari: "Are you fucking serious?! How the hell does the Doc here get one vote, while I don't have any?! What kinda bullshit is that?!"

Nadya: "Perhaps you aren't as popular as you seem to think you are, Ruffian. Or perhaps the people of this country are as tired of that insidious noise you make as I am."

Meari: "Yeah, screw you, Doc. I don't know what kinda bullshit fraud you pulled off here, but..."

Nadya: "Ha! Ruffian, if you honestly believe in that empty head of yours that I had anything to do with you not receiving any votes, then you're even more of a simpleton than I'd originally thought, if that's even possible."

Meari: "Oh, fuck you!"

Aika: "Ladies, please. Regardless of who received votes and who didn't, it was still a good competition."

Meari: "Oh, please. You're only saying that shit cause you not only won, but was in the majority of the lead the entire race."

Aika: "I'll admit, that may have something to do with it. But regardless, it's the end of our anniversary, sadly. So, let's try to leave on a positive note, okay?"

Nadya: "That's fine with me."

Meari: "Yeah, I guess. ...I still want to know who was the idiot that voted for the Doc, though."

Aika: "...That is a valid question, Nadya. Who did vote for you?"

Nadya: "Why do either of you assume I would know who voted for me? I do not know, nor do I care to know."

Meari: "Ha! The Doc's not used to being liked, so she's trying to play it off like it means nothing."

Nadya: "And remind me, Ruffian, which of the two of us received one vote, whilst the other received none?"

Meari: "..."

Nadya: "Yes, my thoughts exactly."

Meari: "Oh, shut the hell up!"

[luneevenfall]

Nano day 14! Now with chess :D

Shortest day so far. I need some time to think before writing that dinner scene lmao

“Are you good at chess, Nadya?” “I would consider myself… competent.” She said as she looked at Blanche. “But looking at you, I have a feeling that I am going to lose.” “Hm? And why would that be?” Blanche’s devious smile only told her that she was right on the money, and she gave a resigned sigh, only making Blanche smile even wider. “Yes, that is exactly why. That reaction.” “If you can read me this well, you may have a chance to win, you know?” “I am not that foolish. I think you’re trying to lure me into a false sense of security only to crush me.” “Oooh, starting the scheming before the game even begins! I should start doing that.” They laughed a little about it before setting up their pieces. It took mere moments for Nadya to be sure that she was getting nowhere with this. She floundered through the match trying to keep up with Blanche’s attack, but in the end, the checkmate was hers. “Checkmate! Try again next time.” Blanche said, sticking out her tongue. “I don’t know if there is much point in trying to beat you, if I’m honest.” “How about I coach you?” Blanche suggested, playing with the queen piece; it was a rather unique set of chess, with the pieces made out of tinted glass. Blanche was looking at the piece as the light played with it, and Nadya followed it with her eyes as well. There was a moment of silence as they just watched the glass, reflecting the light coming down from the chandelier. That silence was broken by footsteps entering the room.

[werewolfdays]

How the hell did I miss the fact that you have an AO3 account???? Care sharing your username or a link? (also yes yes yes tell us more about dem delicious AUs)

Yeah I do have an ao3! I’m not really a fanfic writer tho so there’s only a couple fandom things on there, one of which is the unfinished Dragon Age AU that I wrote in like 2017 and the other is a Cyberpunk 2077 one shot for fem!V and Panam.

If you haven’t seen it, I am actually posting the edited/revised version of Jayde x Nadya’s story on there! First five chapters are up if you wanna read it. I’ll be updating it as regularly as I can!

As for the AUs, I’ll talk a little more about them under the cut!

The only AU I've actually written for is the DA one! Also, it's the first bit of writing I actually did for Jayde x Nadya. I sorta used the fic as a tool to jumpstart my motivation for their canon story and it totally worked. I wouldn't have this blog if it weren't for that fic. But it is objectively bad/cringey cause that's literally the first time I wrote something in years. I still keep it up though cause it's cool to see how much I've improved.

Anyway idk how familiar you are with the games, but Jayde is Hawke from Dragon Age 2 and Nadya is the Inquisitor from Dragon Age: Inquisition. I just loved playing them in the games so much and it actually fit them really well. But then I was frustrated that the Inquisitor couldn't romance Hawke when they made an appearance in the game. thus the fic was born.

I was drawn to it cause of the angst potential too. Particularly in the Trespasser DLC cause the Mark on the Inquisitor's hand starts growing and is slowly killing them until they ultimately lose most of their arm. I never got far enough to write that in the au, but the Mark was Jayde's biggest fear for that very reason and she would have done anything to spare Nadya that pain. So she has it out for Solas BIG time lmao. Maybe I'll revisit the au when DA 4 comes out!

My current au obsession is The Quarry! I didn't expect to have so much fun with that game, but I did and SPOILERS since it's werewolves at a foresty summer camp lodge, my brain immediately went to Jayde and Nadya. Nadya canonically was a summer camp counselor too and I really ran with the idea. I haven't written anything yet, but it might be a fun exercise when I need a break from working on the main story.

The thing about the werewolves in The Quarry is that they're really terrifying and dangerous because they have no control of themselves whatsoever. Also they look gnarly af. Jayde is definitely getting bit saving Nadya and I am 100% adding a scene in there where monster Jayde is gonna go in for the kill, but Nadya calls out her name and makes the werewolf hesitate for just a second. Nothing like that happened in the game, but if Josh from Until Dawn can get through to W*ndigo Hannah then I can have this lol

[therehereeverywhere]

The Light at The End of The Tunnel

As I'm sitting here at my usual Starbucks, I stumbled upon an article in Buzzfeed on people witnessing death. Which is silly, since I should be researching for my final essay. After reading the article, I am reminded by my own near death experience, too many to count. However, of all the experience that I had so far, the one that I still vividly remember was the one when I was barely 7-year-old, when I almost drowned in a hotel pool. I was there with my then best friend, my younger sister, and our nanny. When Nadya, the name of my friend, asked to swim across the deeper side of the pool, I already felt hesitant. My swimming skill was sketchy at best, and there was no lifeguard present. Still, I said yes, and although it was okay at first, in the middle of our crossing, right at the deepest part of the pool, something snapped in me and I panicked. I started to drown, and water got into my lungs. I remember seeing my friend screaming for help from the other side of the pool, and my nanny as well. When the water got into my lungs, it was so painful to breathe. I told myself not to panic, but I was desperate for air, kicking the bottom of the floor as hard and often as I could. I remember thinking, God if I have to die right here, right now, please do it rightaway. I honestly thought that was the end of me. I even stopped kicking. And then out of nowhere, a man came rescuing me, right when I lost all the air in my lungs.

And when I was a bit younger, maybe around 4, my family was on a holiday trip to this small city, Penang. My parents were checking out of the hotel, and my sister and I were playing on the stairs in front of the hotel. Just like any other hotel, there was a slope near the stairs for luggage and whatnot. I remember walking up and down the slope, until suddenly my feet slipped and I fell face first on that slope. The first thought was pain, and then panic when I could not breathe. I tried reaching for my sister, but she thought I was joking. When finally the doorman saw me blue and choking, he called out for help, my parents running toward us. I remember again that feeling of not able to breathe. I truly, definitely was going to die. My lips were blue, my eyes unfocused. And then again, a man just got off the car, and when he saw the commotion, he told everyone to turn my body face down and insert fingers into my mouth to induce cough. He was mute, so it took some time for people to understand what he was trying to tell us. But again, I was saved, at the very last seconds. No one really knows, not even the doctors we went after that accident, why I could not breathe after the fall. Although it did not impact my lungs or ribcage, to this day I have this fear of slopes or slippery surface.

Although I managed to conquer my fear of drowning and actually love swimming now, I never really got over my fear of slopes and slippery surface. Sometimes I wonder why, but I don't really dwell on these stuff anyway.

To this day, I try my very best to help others, because really, the reason I'm still here, posting this is because of the kindness of those two men. I would 100% be dead had they chose not to care, something that I sadly see way too often these days.

I cannot help but wonder, does my existence make this world a better place? Does anyone feel blessed with me living, walking on this planet? Have I done enough with what I am given in my 32 years here, or does God regret giving me so much?

At the end of the day, I want to be the light at the end of that tunnel. I want to be useful, I want to help. I hope that God did not make a mistake when He decided that I should live longer.

[coeurvrai]

We return to Wicked Saints with Chapter 23, a chapter that is - unfortunately - a Nadya chapter. We open with, oddly enough, a Book of Saints excerpt rather than something from the Codex of the Divine. In a better book, this would mean something. In a better book, all of these excerpts would’ve meant something.

Svoyatovi Yakov Luzhkov: The founder of the Selortevnsky monastery in Ghelovkhin, a place where clerics were trained in secret to fight in the holy war. When the monastery was destroyed in 1520, Yakov burned with it.

Okay... great? Thanks for that information that was totally necessary and will be relevant to the current chapter, I’m sure.

Again, using dates when you haven’t established a proper timeline is meaningless, because we don’t know how long ago these events were in respect to the present. Sure, it’s a bit more specific than the others because we know that by the events of the start of the book, the war between Kalyazin and Tranavia has been going on for about 100 years, but still, meaningless.

Everyone is still at dinner and Nadya is, surprising to herself, having a pretty good time, all things considered.

The High Prince of Tranavia was a charming boy who enjoyed self-deprecation and complaining. Nadya found herself laughing at his jokes and responding in kind as the evening went on. Żaneta was equally engaging, with biting wit and a keen intelligence that Nadya had not expected from one of the most impressive blood mages of the court.

Well, this is fast becoming a nightmare, she thought as she swirled her spoon through a bowl of borscht. There was soft music playing in the background, airy and light, and the atmosphere of the room didn’t feel nearly as oppressive as when the king had entered.

Nadya is, however, getting along a bit too swimmingly with Serefin for my tastes, considering she’s supposed to have - to put it mildly - a grudge against him for leading an assault on her home and, to Nadya’s knowledge, hurting and killing the people that she supposedly cares about there, including Kostya. She was so afraid of him when he rocked up at the monastery in Chapter 1 and now she’s just totally fine with him and considers him charming and funny.

If Nadya was clever and seriously cared, she’d attempt to talk him about his efforts in the war and in Kalyazin to try to covertly find out what happened after she fled the monastery and if any of the people she’s supposed to love are alive.

Also that description of Żaneta has me side-eyeing and I can’t tell that whether that’s just me and my heightened sensitivity due to how xenophobic and discriminatory Nadya is supposed to be. Like, is she surprised that Żaneta is intelligent and witty because she’s a Tranavian? Is it because she’s a Tranavian and she’s a blood mage? Is it because she’s accomplished? I can’t tell.

Either way, it’s not necessarily an unsurprising implication from Nadya all things considered but the fact that Nadya is supposed to have evolved so much that her views on Tranavians are... let’s say more progressive, the inherent judginess of what she’s saying leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Maybe that’s just my mixed race ass reading too much into it, IDK.

Also this book itself is a bloody nightmare, both literally and figuratively.

“A nightmare that you are making for yourself.” Nadya almost dropped her spoon when Marzenya’s voice rang through the back of her head.

Not now, she pleaded. She couldn’t keep this up and have a goddess pulling her apart for what she had done at the same time. Admonish me all you like later but not here.

“You are treading dangerous ground, child.”

Dangerous ground that she was only making worse. Marzenya required full devotion. Nadya never could have dreamed that would be an issue. Yet here she was, a few days into Tranavia and already full of conflict.

Well, Marzenya is apparently getting through okay, because she’s able to talk directly to Nadya at dinner. This is like, the second or third time. I didn’t really believe you when you said, book, that the connection between Nadya and the gods would be strained and difficult due to the nature of her being in Tranavia, and I still don’t believe you now.

Also, “keep this up”? You’ve been a grand ol’ time apparently at dinner, besides glaring at the king and getting caught by Serefin glaring at the king. I don’t know what the difficulty would be, really, besides paying attention if anyone tries to talk to you. It’s not like it’s taking all your energy to stop yourself from murdering everyone you’re sitting beside with a fork or something.

Also, we’re not going to really unpack that last paragraph because I feel like I’ve commented on it enough and about the bullshit nature of this whole fucking thing as is. I’m just going to happily continue eating my dumplings because dumplings are delicious.

Anyways, the king gets angry at a servant, throws a goblet at the wall, and the servant runs away. A Vulture goes after them and ,ost of the people at the table aren’t exactly thrilled at that. 

Ostyia comments to Serefin that the king’s temper is worsening and Serefin tries to temper his discomfort with more alcohol, but his glass is empty. Thank fuck for that. Serefin asks Nadya to call him Serefin instead of “Your Highness” and she just rolls with it.

“Trade places with me,” the one-eyed girl demanded of Serefin.

“You can’t flirt with every girl here, Ostyia,” Serefin said.

“I can and I will,” she replied primly.

He rolled his eyes and��casting another anxious look toward where his father sat—stood up and traded places with the girl.

Ostyia had a glittering eye patch covering her right eye in place of a mask. Her smile was electric, and she shined it Nadya’s way.

For some bloody reason, Nadya refers to her as “the one-eyed girl” despite knowing and using Ostyia’s name the sentence before that and then preceding to use it straight afterwards. Like, that’s not necessary, just use her name again!

Also, I’ve said it several times to @jefflion but Ostyia is quite literally the only one in this book who is explicitly queer so far. ED has gone on and on on her tumblr and her twitter talking about how basically everyone is queer and like how all the main Tranavian characters aren’t straight; that Kacper and Serefin are gonna have a romance in the later books but like??? Bitch, where?!

You can’t say that Nadya and Serefin are queer, when they have not commented on women and men, respectively, the same way they have commented and been explicitly attracted to men and women, respectively.

Look, I am bisexual. If you meet me for even two seconds online and/or at uni, I make it pretty fucking clear that I am attracted to girls too. I will take notice of girls I think are pretty or cute. Not always, but I do do it.

And the fact that there’s no build up for Serefin and Kacper either, even though there should be if she’s intending for them to have some romance in Ruthless Gods and the third book is just... fucking lazy. Like yes, there’s a couple of scenes in the book that you could technically say might have romantic undertones but the point I’m trying to make is the lack of explicit queerness.

At this point, ED is no better than JK Rowling with her whole “Dumbledore is gay!” shtick. Or rather, she’s barely better, but it’s a fucking low bar.

Also, as an aside: earlier, Serefin has Ostyia flirt with Żaneta as a distraction, but we never really get a reaction from Żaneta. ED nominally says that Żaneta is bi, but we don’t get a reaction from Żaneta in the text. For all we know, Żaneta could be uncomfortable with her flirting. Or she could be into it, but we just don’t know! 

[borealtwilight]

OC Muse Meme

tagged by: @corey-067 ( thanks my dude :D ) tagging: @epsiloneridani07, @jackalopingintothevoid, @pantheris... if y’all wanna do it. you don’t have to; it’s just a bit of fun! I think I’ll go with Nadya, just for a bit of a change

APPEARANCE

I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses I have at least one tattoo I have at least one piercing I have blonde hair I have brown eyes ( well....when she’s thrown back in time she wears brown contacts ) I have short hair My abs are at least somewhat defined I have or have had braces

PERSONALITY

I love meeting new people People tell me that I’m funny Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me I enjoy physical challenges I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it There is something I would change about my personality

ABILITY

I can sing well I can play an instrument I can do over 30 push-ups without stopping I’m a fast runner I can draw well I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling  I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch I know how to throw a proper punch

HOBBIES

I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month I enjoy writing I do or have done martial arts

EXPERIENCES

I have had my first kiss I have had alcohol I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country/Planet/Galaxy/Universe I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts

RELATIONSHIPS

I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships   I have never been in a (serious) relationship I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year I have been in a relationship for at least a year I have had feelings for a friend  

MY LIFE

I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” I live close to my school My parents are still together I have at least one “sibling” There is snow right now where I live I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a datapad I share(d) my room with someone

RANDOM

I have break-danced I know a person named Jamie I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce I have dyed my hair ( when she gets thrown back in time, yes ) I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone  I have eaten a waffle today I know what I want to do with my life I speak at least 2 languages

[sidekickhq]

selina is cuban. so why does the family page make her mexican? mexican = / = cuban its gross and disrespectful

hey there! admin l here, aka the local authority on latinx fcs. for context, i was born and raised in puerto rico; i only moved away 5 months ago ( and i miss it terribly ). so let’s just say i know what i’m talking about here.

let me start by saying that selina’s ethnicity is not common knowledge. most of us didn’t find out until very recently ( i just found out today ), but don’t blame us. blame the film studios and directors that constantly whitewash her. her ethnicity isn’t exactly prominent in her character, and i’ll get into that in a bit. there’s a serious problem with the representation of latinxs in the media. i’m not super well-versed in the dc universe, but i’ve done my research. like i said, selina’s enthnicity isn’t really prominent with her as a character. she doesn’t embody anything particularly cuban, she doesn’t really show she’s a part of that culture in anything she does. and i’m not saying she should put on a headrwap, light a cigar and start singing a celia cruz song. all latinx experiences are different, and we express our culture in different ways. what i am trying to say is that this was never something vital to selina’s character. her origin has been rewritten, questioned, and blurred. she doesn’t even remember parts of it. some people claim that making selina’s mom latina out of the blue and rarely even mentioning it is “ lazy lipservice to actual diversity, ” ( like i said, i did my research). if we want actual diversity in all media, but especially in comics, we need to do more. but i digress.

the origin story that you’re referring to is strong evidence to suggest that maria, selina’s mother, is latina. it’s a narrative specific to latinx women with abusive, white partners. there’s no confirmation that she’s cuban, specifically. when harley retells selina’s origin, she says her mother was “ cuban or something, ” and being harley, we don’t have to take that at face value. but this is just me trying to analyze the situation as a writer and as a latina. making stories more diverse takes more than just saying “ cuban or something “.

but let’s say selina’s mother maria is, in fact, unequivocally, irrevocably cuban. she’s a “ refugee “ who feld cuba after the revolution ( a common narrative, i myself know many cubans who moved to puerto rico in the late 50s and early 60s, escaping communism ) and married an abusive, white man, which is implied to be a marriage of convenience. his prejudice against her implies that she married him, a “ white joe “, for a green card. but that could be me reading too much into it. i am a lit major, after all. but yes. maria kyle is cuban. selina kyle is ½ cuban. if someone were to apply as her in this roleplay, she would be mexican. now i agree, mexican =/= cuban. the mexican and cuban experiences are different. of course. here’s the thing: in this roleplay, a next gen rp, selina has a daughter, nadya. if we were to stick to this specific origin story, nadya would have to be ¼ cuban, and there are little to no ¼ cuban fcs with enough resources, that fit nadya’s age or personality. not even ½ cuban fcs that fit her. that points to a much larger problem with representation in the media. lack of resources = lack of cuban actresses and models. and that’s not our fault. it would be a disservice to the character to stick her with a subpar fc for the sake of accuracy.

my opinion would be different if we were talking about a movie, or a tv show ( like dynasty, for example. i mean, yikes. a peruvian actress and a mexican-american actress playing venezuelan sisters. latinxs pick up on the chopped up spanish, and inaccurate accents. and that’s disrespectful ).

latinx ethnicities are not interchangeable. that’s not what i’m saying. i’m still pissed that in west side story there’s only ONE puerto rican actress playing a shark, ( natalie wood was russian and ukranian. russian ! and ukranian ! ) and that movie was released in 1961. it’s been 57 years and i’m still not letting go. hell, i’m pissed that they cast a white brazilian actress to play cecilia reyes in the new mutants movie, a black puerto rican character ( which is not something you see very often in the media. remember kids, there are white, brown, and black latinxs. latinx is not a race, it’s an ethnicity. you want a character whose race and ethnicity is prominent in her story? go look her up ). there are some cases where this is done respectfully, like one day at a time, for example. you have three puerto ricans and a colombian playing a cuban family. it’s done with respect. it deals with the specificity of the cuban, and the cuban-american experience. doesn’t treat latinx experiences as interchangable.

but back to the roleplay. there’s a lack of fcs and a lack of good resources. keeping selina latina was important to the admins. the faceclaim that best fit her daughter, nadya, was eiza gonzalez. in order to be respectful of her ethnicity, that would make selina kyle mexican. end of story.

[valkyrie-echo]

Project Echo, Part 2: Chapter 20 (JARVIS Is My DJ)

Part 2 Summary: A new enemy surfaces with a team of the Avengers’ greatest foes, hand-picked for their destruction. Meanwhile, Inessa’s pre-Hydra past begins to surface, casting doubt on where her loyalties truly lie.

Chapter 20: JARVIS Is My DJ

"Entering the arena, the still-undefeated champion of Avengers Tower- Loch Nessa Ryker!" Tony was sitting at Inessa's bedside when she woke around midday. She tried to turn her head to see him, "Nope, you've got to keep still. The back of your neck was torn clean off, remember?"

Inessa tried to reach out with her other senses and see through the shadows of the room- nothing. No Nadya, no Valley. She sighed, frustrated.

"Oh, yeah, sorry about that. Grounding still stands. Until we can safely reattach this," he held up the discarded implant, "JARVIS is your DJ."

"How much trouble-" Inessa's throat was dry, scratchy, and raw. Speaking set off a small coughing fit- which only agitated the oozing scabs on her neck.

Tony winced in sympathy, "Not envying you right now, kiddo. If you were asking how much trouble we're in, we don't know. The med Suits were blown to hell on their way to the hospital with the little assassins still inside. JARVIS is analyzing the data and security camera feeds now and we should have a rough idea soon enough. If, on the other hand, you were wondering how much trouble you and Bucky are in-" he waited to see Inessa's response. She did what she could to indicate a nod, "none at all. There were no rules against walks- even though there damn well are now. Pulling the implant probably was the only call that could be made, so yeah- you're both off the hook."

Inessa nodded (sort of) and swallowed several times before trying to speak again, "How is Bucky?"

"Bitchy, brooding, grumpy- nothing new."

"I heard that," Inessa couldn't turn to see him, but Bucky was propped up in the bed on the other side of her from Tony. He'd been awake for an hour or so already.

"Oh, good, your hearing is alright. JARVIS, add that to the med file."

"It was never not alright," sometimes he understood Steve's frustration with Stark.

Tony stood up with a smirk- he liked Bucky. He was almost as fun to needle as Steve, but tended to take it better. On a good day he'd even dish it back. "I've got work to do on this thing," he held up the implant, "and you two are on lockdown in here until JARVIS gives you the all-clear, so hang tight."

"JARVIS, give me the all-clear."

"I cannot do that, Mister Barnes, bed rest is still advised for one in your current condition."

"I'm coming after your hard drive with a magnet," Bucky grumbled.

Something low came over comms, Bucky wasn't entirely sure he'd heard it right, but Inessa's suppressed giggle (and groan from the pain that caused) made him think the A.I. really did just say "Good luck getting it off your arm first."

A knock on the door stalled Steve on his way to the meeting room, "JARVIS, who is it?"

"Doctor Pryor to see you and Miss Inessa," Steve sighed, he didn't have time for this right now.

"Hold on for a few minutes, I have to deal with something," he waved off Tony and Sam as they headed in. Before opening the door, Steve plastered on a courteous smile, "Doctor Pryor, how are you?"

She came in quickly, before he even had a chance to turn her away. The doctor seemed agitated, "I saw a news story saying someone destroyed several of Mister Stark's suits and Inessa missed her appointment- naturally I was worried for the well being of my patient."

"I'm going to have to ask you to come back tomorrow, now isn't a good time," Steve blocked her path before she stepped further into their home.

Pryor immediately began to push at Steve's mind with her gifts, "Why isn't it a good time?"

There's no harm in telling her, he thought suddenly, she just wants what is best for Inessa, "Inessa was injured last night, not critically but she does need her rest. I'd speak with you but I'm on my way into a meeting with the other Avengers to decide how we are going to respond to the attack on those suits as well as the deaths of the teens inside. If you'd please just bear with me, I'm sorry that I forgot to call and tell you she wouldn't make it today."

"Swear to me I will be permitted to see my patient tomorrow? You won't send her out of town? I don't have to tell you how detrimental that would be to her treatment at this time." she nudged at Steve's mind again, making her words lock in place.

"Y-yes," he felt odd, slightly dizzy and dazed, "I promise. Now, please," he stepped around her and grabbed onto the still-open door.

Doctor Pryor checked his mind one last time to make sure her puppet would play his part, then smiled, suddenly friendly again, "Of course, pardon my intrusion. Have a nice day, and I hope nothing is too amiss."

"Thank you for your understanding doctor, you have a nice day as well." Steve closed the door, shook his head to dis-spell the fog, and returned to the meeting room where the four at the farm were already on the screen. He'd intended to send Inessa back as soon as possible, but maybe he was being too hasty. Maybe the city really was the best place for her right now.

Sebastian Morris' Base - Location Unknown

"Tell me Ryker, what would your next move be, if you were them?" Albatross was reclining on a small sofa while the (now much younger) General cut up an apple at the kitchen table nearby.

"They would be fools to not see this as a declaration of war," Ryker remained focused on peeling the skin away from the apple. "They should gather in one place and dangle Nadya out for all their enemies to see. If they were convincing enough, even Morris might buy into the illusion. Then, once we attack, they should scramble their lineup, keep each of us from ever seeing our targets, and hope that is enough to stop us."

"And what is it you believe they will do?" Albatross liked Ryker, he reminded him of his favorite KGB leader from back in the good old days. Competency was so hard to come by.

"They will continue to keep secrets from one another, allow their ranks to become weak, focus on all the wrong problems, and when we do attack, they will die. Disappointingly quickly."

Albatross grinned, "Not my Natasha. I've known her since she was just a wee lass- she'll die, but I bet she puts up a hell of a fight on her way out the door."

"You believe you can beat her this time? You've been in prison for twenty years, she has continued to train and fight all that time."

"Natasha used our friendship to lure me into a trap, this time that will not be possible. Besides, her mind will be so muddled and confused by the time we are unleashed she'll barely be able to muster a defense, let alone an offense."

"Compared to the rest of you my job is easy- lock Banner down before he becomes the Hulk, then let that green bastard rage and test the strength of his prison until he becomes the man again. He'll provide me with plenty of blood to analyze, then Morris will take him as a gift of thanks from me to his master, along with my disappointing granddaughter. Hopefully he'll be able to make something remotely respectable out of her, unlike my idiot son. Sunshine and rainbows all around."

"Ideally," Albatross agreed, "but don't get ahead of yourself. Hubris is as dangerous an enemy as any. Remember how Banner defeated you in the past, and what it cost you. Make sure he isn't in a position to do that again. And we will need to be patient and evaluate the others Mister Morris brings in on this venture- three Avengers are still without enemies, and I do not like the idea of trusting the brother of the Avenger to take part in his assassination."

"Family makes the best enemy sometimes," Ryker for one didn't doubt the hatred Berny had for his elder brother.

"I do hope you are right."

Morris cleared his throat as he entered with a large and very old man- at least seven feet tall, "Gentlemen, allow me to introduce Cul Borson, the Serpent of Asgard." he snapped his fingers and two dozen Hydra agents entered the room and lined up neatly against the far wall, "Will that be enough? I can find more."

The man spoke with a frail, strained voice, "They'll make a good enough start." He held out a grizzled hand towards the soldiers. A black mist poured from him and slipped across the room. Albatross casually lifted his feet to keep the mist from touching him and watched. As it touched the Hydra agents they seemed confused- clearly they hadn't been told what kind of assignment this was to be. Ryker was intensely interested as the men began to scream and tried to break ranks. The mist acted like concrete and locked them in place. One by one the light in their eyes faded, their irises became milky and opaque. Some lines appeared on their faces as the skin sagged and hung limp.

Albatross turned from the spectacle to watch Cul Borson himself. All of the Hydra soldiers had withered to the half-alive state, but he was now quite the opposite. His white, thin hair was growing thicker and darker, the hunch in his spine straightened out, and he seemed to glow with an otherworldly youth. His face was quite peaceful, whereas his victims looked dead at best. Walking corpses. "Welcome to our merry band, Mister Borson," he wouldn't stand and risk the mist, but Albatross nodded his head politely to their new teammate.

"Take care how you address me Midgardian," the man's voice boomed, filling the room- a voice meant to be heard over large crowds, "I am a God."

"My most sincere apologies, your holiness," Albatross tried his best to mask the sarcasm in his voice. He half-bowed, still refusing to stand from his chair, "I look forward to our partnership moving forward."

"Tell him your line about hubris," Ryker mumbled under his breath. Morris escorted Cul Borson to another room in their little base, leaving him and Albatross with the zombies in the corner. He didn't like the attitude- anyone who declared himself a god was closer to the nut house than Olympus or Asgard or whatever the hell he thought he ruled, but he had to respect the display of power. Suddenly this venture was looking much more promising.

Albatross was eyeing the soldiers in the corner, still vacant and staring, "I hope they don't begin to stink."

Chapter 21: What Morris Built

[anwenwrites]

My Own Best Friend--Chapter 5: Misunderstood

NADYA POV

“Oh great, now where did I put it?!” Duncan goes red and fumbles around in his pockets, making me giggle. I don’t think he realizes how easily he gets embarrassed. Or how cute he is when he does. 

Duncan digs anxiously into his last pocket and his face lights up. “There they are!” he exclaims, pulling out an envelope. He opens it and takes out a long, white strip of paper, which he hands to me. I read the small print on it, and realize it’s...a plane ticket...to Australia?

“Duncan, what is this for?” I ask. Surely he can’t expect me to run off with him. I shudder, thinking about how my dad would stop at nothing to hunt me down if I ever did run off.

Duncan says, “Nadya, I’d like you to come with me to my old house in Australia. This trip is going to be...hard, to say the least, and I could really use the moral support.” 

I sigh. I want to go. I want to be there for Duncan. I want to get away from my dad, even for just a while. But I feel stuck. Trapped. 

I avoid meeting his eyes and say, “Duncan, you know I will always help you in any way that I can. But my dad...I just don’t know how this will go over with him.” I peek up at him through my eyelashes, knowing it’s not what he wanted to hear. 

Duncan narrows his eyes. The very sight fills me with dread. 

“Come on, he can’t control your life forever!” he insists. “You should be able to go somewhere without asking his permission.”

“I know,” I agree sadly. “It’s not fair at all.”

“Well then, you do what is fair. Tell him you’re going to Australia with me and you’ll be back when you’ll be back.”

I shudder, horrified at the idea. It’s unfathomable, actually. My dad’s never been Duncan’s biggest fan to begin with, but ever since I told him that Duncan and I wanted to make things official, I can’t even go to Mikha’s without him calling me every hour to make sure I’m really with her. I have never lied to my dad (apart from failing to ever mention Duncan to him when we were together the first time), but the more he acts like this, the more I feel like I have to. 

“Please.” Duncan looks at me with his gentle honey brown eyes, and his lip quivers.

At this sight, tears prick my own eyes, and I cave.  “All right. I’ll come.”

“Oh, Nadya, thank you!” Duncan crushes me to his chest. 

“Can’t...breathe,” I wheeze, struggling to loosen his grip just a little.

“Oh! Sorry.” Duncan releases me and strokes my cheek instead. “You mean the world to me, Nadya.”

“And you to me,” I say, but I look at him sadly. I have no idea if I’m actually going to be able to follow through with this or not. 

“Will you tell your dad now?” Duncan asks me.

I hesitate. “Um, yes. He should be home from the fire station by now.”

Duncan kisses me quickly before squeezing my hand goodbye. “Text me when you get home.”

“I will,” I promise, then start the ten-minute walk from his place to mine. 

As soon as I reach the house, a sense of dread fills my entire body. The house suddenly looks huge, and the shadows of the trees are elongated by the setting sun, making me feel as though they are about to swallow me up. A chill creeps through me, and I look down at my hands. Am I...shaking?

“Mikha’s dad doesn’t make her feel this way,” I mutter to myself as I brave the short walk down the driveway to the doorstep. 

With clammy hands, I open the door and step inside. “Dad, I’m home!” I call in Indonesian.

“In the kitchen!” he replies.

 He doesn’t sound angry that I wasn’t home when he came home, at least. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.

I go into the kitchen to find my dad poring over the newspaper. He looks up when he sees me, his severe dark eyes boring into mine. I shrink, even though he hasn’t even said anything to me yet.

“How was your day?” he asks. It sounds more like an inquiry than genuine interest.

“G-good,” I reply, starting to shake again. Thankfully he doesn’t notice, for he gets up to retrieve two plates from the cabinet. He begins to pile them with rice, meat, and vegetables.

“Not too much for me, Dad,” I say. My stomach is in such a knot I know I won’t be able to eat. I don’t want to waste it.

“But it’s your favorite,” he says. “Nasi goreng. Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m fine, Dad,” I say quickly. I don’t want him to see how nervous I am.

“If you say so.” His lip curls into a smile. “Just like your mother. Never lets on when there’s definitely something on her mind.”

I’m used to comments like this. My dad never did get over my mom. And how could I blame him? One morning, she was packing my lunch and kissing him goodbye as he left for the fire station, and that afternoon, her body was left mangled after the orangutan attack. We never got to say goodbye. Sometimes I still can’t believe she’s really gone.

“So, how is Duncan?” my dad asks, setting my plate in front of me.

I bite my lip. He’s trying to act interested, but I can tell he’s just trying to find out whether we’ve become boyfriend and girlfriend yet. 

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that, Dad,” I say, my palms sweating harder than ever. I swallow hard and continue, “Duncan’s mom’s old landlord died and left the house to him. So Duncan’s going to go to Australia to fix it up. And he wants me to—I mean, I’m going with him.”

“LIKE HELL YOU ARE!” my dad explodes suddenly, making me jump and nearly stabbing me with the fork he was just about to place in front of me.

“Dad! My face!” I cry.

“I can’t believe you!” he yells, slamming the fork on the table. “You come home late, you don’t want the dinner I spent an hour making for you, and now you think you’re running off to Australia with that dope?!”

My first instinct is to defend Duncan. “Duncan is not a—”

“You think you can just leave the country without my permission?” my dad demands.

“I didn’t ask your permission because I knew you’d say no!” I cry, tears welling up in my eyes and finally spilling over. “Besides, I’ve already got the ticket.” I pull the ticket out of my pocket to show him, and he glares at me.

“You will return that thing tonight,” he implores, “and then you will not see or speak to Duncan outside of work.”

I’m furious at my dad, but I know when I’ve been beat. “Okay, Dad. I’ll go after dinner.”

We eat in silence. The only sounds are those of my dad’s fork scraping aggressively against his plate, piercing the air. Even though I feel like I’m going to throw up, I somehow manage to clear my entire plate, probably out of fear of what else my dad might say if I don’t eat the meal he’s fixed.

My dad finishes his last mouthful of rice and pushes his chair back. The chair makes a loud screeching sound.

“You go return that plane ticket,” he says quietly, which somehow scares me even more than the yelling. “I’ll clean up.”

I hurry out the door and text Duncan to come to me. My legs are shaking so bad I can’t possibly walk all the way to his place and back. I can’t believe my dad would leave me to go walk in the dark at this hour either.

Five minutes later Duncan stumbles out of the woods, sweaty and out of breath. He must have run. And taken his forest shortcut that I can never figure out.

He takes in my trembling frame, and his eyes go wide with concern. 

“Nadya, what’s going on?” he asks, reaching me in two strides and taking me gently into his arms. 

I tell him the whole story. His brown eyes harden into daggers. “I could kill him,” he spits.

I shush him. “Don’t let my dad hear you say that. He will use it against you.”

“I don’t care,” Duncan growls. 

I stare hard at him, annoyed. He shouldn’t have been pushing me to come to Australia in the first place. I told him my dad would say no. 

“You need to care a little,” I say. “You’re pushing me into doing things I know will make him mad, and you won’t listen to me when I tell you so.”

Duncan takes a step back, hurt. “How can you say that?”

“Can’t you understand, Duncan? You’re playing with fire. If you keep this up, it could mean bad things for both of us.”

 “You know he’s the unreasonable one, so how can you blame me?” he demands.

“Please, Duncan, I can’t deal with any more guilt right now,” I plead.

“If that’s how you want it,” he snaps. 

I feel my cheeks get damp yet again. “I’m sorry, Duncan.”

“I take it this means you’re not coming to Australia, then.”

“That’s right,” I say, producing the plane ticket out of my pocket and pressing it into his hand.

“I can’t believe this,” he snaps. “Your dad treats you horrendously, and I’m the one who suffers.”

Then he turns his back on me and sprints into the forest without kissing me goodbye. I watch helplessly as he disappears into the endless woods, now-angry tears distorting my vision. It’s bad enough that my dad won’t let me see Duncan, but I expected that. Knew it even. But Duncan refusing to listen to me and getting mad at me for his own stubbornness is far worse. I thought at least he would understand. He always had until now.

[bilingualplots]

That concert crazy me!

Well, short-long story. I am a huge and mega fan of one direction but actually I fond of Harry the most. The curly, green eyed member. I’ve been the fan from a long ago. I had been their concert once, when they came to did some tour on my country. I was crazy as hell and excited for that. That time, I was a freshman year of college and it was hell, sleepless and tiring period especially when you join in medical department. No time to play, going around even in a weekend sometimes you have lectures and have to do some shits. So it challenged me to go to that concert. I didnt know my schedule when the concert held. But I bought the tickets anyway. I got the vip tickets well I bought it from my own money. No, I didnt work or earn money I mean I dont have time to do that. That money was from scholarships I got. I spent the whole money for the concert without even thinking. I was so glad I didnt spent the money yet cause before I knew that One Direction would held a concert, I was planning to buy some woman things to spend that money.

My senior high school friend who also adore One Direction, asked me to go to the concert together. I agreed of course cause the concert didnt held on my city its miles away from the city I lived but still It didnt down me at all.

So I gave it all to my friend. Nadya–well but I call her Lia. She bought the tickets, I just needed to transferred the money to her. And yup. We got the freaking tickets. Yeay!

Days after days went. And it was a couple days from the day of the concert. And guess what, a day before the concert I was going to have a test. Practice test. Shit man. I was crazy I even wanted to cry but I decided to stay cool. The test’s day began, I finished the test and felt good cause the test went well. It was over around four or five in the evening and guess what again? my plane fly at six and I hadn’t even packed my things. I just had one shirt in my mind, the shirt that written “Harry Styles’s wife” that I was going to wear for the concert.

After doing the test, my lecturer suprised me by saying she wanted to say something so we have to wait her. And the clock was never stop and it taunt me in every seconds it ticked. My friend, Lia had been calling me all the time and all I could do was just make her calm her tits.

My lecturer was so long and I just couldn’t stand it. So I decided to just go and didnt mind it. I was just guessing that she wont even checked the list of attendance. I drove the car so fast to my home and pick my things. It felt so relived when I arrived at home and find my mom help me to packed my things.

My dad drove me to the airport and when I was on my way, my classmate called me. I pick the call and she sounded like she was wispering. My heart beaten so fast when she said that the lecturer was calling us one by one and check the list of attendance. I was freak out cause I didnt want my lecturer missunderstood and think that I dont attend the test. But what can I do. I was on my way to airport and my plane was flying in half hour.

When I arrived at airport I was acting crazy and run to my senior high school friend. My mom and hers doing the mom’s thing. Kissing cheeks, hugging in mother way and all.

We said good by to our mothers and passed the gates, my phone was ringing and I pick it up found massage from my classmate said that the lecturer had stopped calling the students name right before my names turn. Maybe two couple of name left until my name called but she decided to just stop and say that she believed all the students attended the class. And bye that, I thanked God. It was like God indeed had planned that I was allowed to go to the concert and meet my idola.

I and Lia, we both arrived around 8 night or 9 I’m not so sure, and we got picked by my other friend who also wanted to go to the concert. Her name was Mia. She lived in Bandung cause she studied there and what another lucky I got was Mia’s mom treated us by booked two rooms in a hotel near GBK (the place that held the concert) and not only rooms, she also sent someone to guide us around the city with car, so we didnt have to use public transportation and all, pluss I could save my money.

We checked in and going to the room directly. My friend Mia thought that Lia wanted to bring her friend so Mia booked two rooms but Lia’s friend cancelled and sold the ticket to stranger.

Three of us stayed in the same room cause Mia was scared to stay alone in the other room. And yes that one room was useless. At midnight we decided to order food, we chose Bonchon but ended up ordered KFC cause Bochon didnt pick the call, I assumed it was already close.

The delivered man was so long and we ended up sleeping until he arrived and I didnt realize the delivered man already standing in front of our room for maybe hours. I’m not sure how long. I took the money and handed it to him. Said sorry multiple times for making him wait for too long. We didnt forget to give more tips for the mistake we made.

We ended up ate the food maybe at 2 or 3 in the morning and go back to sleep with leftovers which I ate at 6 in the morning and went back to sleep again. I know you felt disgust but I dont care. I’m still alive any way.

We wake up at almost 10 in the morning and rushed to lobby to take our breakfast. Cause it was closed if it was up 10 morning.

After that, we decided to get ready. We went to change the voucher to the real ticket. When we arrived at ticket changer, we saw so much people I mean really much people who queued to change tickets like us. We were like going to die standing in a very long line, stress out until securty came and asked us to show our voucher. Lia took it from her bag and that security told us that vip gate wasnt where we stand. He took Lia to the other gates and went through and disappeared. I and Mia waited outside cause it wasnt allowed us to come, the three ticket was named by Lia and her guess so she had to take it by her self.

I took a seat with Mia and not to long after sitting, Lia came from that gates with big smile and tickets along with the handband in her hand. Gosh! I couldn’t believe I was on my way to see my Idola. The Idola that I only see through the glass of television, laptop or phone. And in some hours later, I was going to meet him and inhale the same air with them.

Dont tell me that Im so naiff or Lame cause I’m not. You dont know how it feels when you finally got to meet the people who gave you so much changed. In a better way. I mean, without fangirling 1D I would probably doesnt speak or write english things like now, like this, or I couldn’t knew or have friends abroad or anything else. This fangirling made me alive. So just shut the hell up and dont judge me.

The concert would be held on 7 evening and it was like 12 afternoon when we had done change the voucher into real freaking tickets. So we decided to go to mall cause Mia need to buy some clothes. We arrived to the Mall, I foget what Mall and going to Zara. Mia and Nadya bought shirt, well Mia bought bunch of clothes and a couple of pants and if I’m not mistaken she bought a couple of shoes too. In Zara I met some famous people who always showed in local tv. Such a Najwa, the owner of Mata Najwa show or some of Ftv actor, I was not sure who, cause I didnt pay attention to them. It was just Lia who said that.

After that, Mia still went through the shop find something else to buy. I didnt know what it is. So me and Lia decided to just go around the mall, we stopped to buy some ice cream and at CD shop. I bought two cd of one direction and some books of it while Lia was busy to take pictures from the architecture of the Mall and all. Yes, she is that girl who are great with pencil, pen and all, drawing and made house in a paper. Architecture people said.

After that we went back to hotel, we decided to have lunch, wanted to have delivery again but Lia againts it so we went to the restaurant near the hotel and had some yakiniku. After that we went back to the hotel and had some rest until we wake up in the evening maybe it seven and it was so late, so we prepared as fast as possible.

We ended up arrive at 8 night with clearer way to the gates. Cause people is already in the stadium. I know. We were late. It was sucks!

Then, we ran before that I bought some bandana with a light in it and some small posters. We went to the gates. I bought mineral waters which was so expensive but I didnt mind at all cause I was thirsty and It was impossible to go out for just a bottle of mineral water.

We went through the door the vip seat and saw tons of people. I didnt see any seat at all so we went out and take the other door. I saw the yellow area and already knew it was Vvip seat cause I saw some famous people there too, like actor and singers of my country. we got exactly three seat right besode the vvip area and it was so good for view. We got another lucky again.

Another of another lucky we got was the stars hadnt come out yet. The stage still play some song from 5Sos and play the commercials tour of 1D itself. We didnt late.

And time flies I grew crazy on my head. Shit. I cant stand my self I was so nervous, they always played us by act like the stars was going out but actually no. And it was getting crazier when we saw Niall run across and went back to the backstage. There was so much noise and loud that made me goosebumps. Until that time, that time i couldn’t forget until now. That time when I cried, shit dont judge me for being so exaggerated cause I did admit that I had this fascinated and butterflies feeling.

One direction came out, with the intro of Clouds. I was screaming like crazy until some bodyguards who suited like army looked at me like seriously girl?! But I didnt care at all.

I jumped and scream along the song and all very time Harry great in my way I scream again and said that, those greating were belong to me like he looked at me directly. I didnt even put single care when some girls gave disgusted look. I just enjoyed the show.

All I did was cry and scream along to the song and thats all, I didint even care to record cause I was just to happy and need to enjoy the music and show. Lia was screaming like me, but she scream for Liam and I scream for Harry. Then Mia was so crazy with Zayn but yes, Zayn didnt come up to the show. But still she loves 1D maybe Niall, I think.

We sang along didnt mind our bag which were in the seat, possibly could be stolen anytime but I didnt care. All my focus went on the staege, I couldnt even wanted to blink. Gosh! That was so amazing, I could feel my heart beating so hard right now writing this thing.

After that, I couldn’t tell you the details of the concert cause it will need the whole day to write it. All you have to know is directioner are crazy, I never stop to get goosebumps cause the crowd never stop to sing along the star on the stage. Even Liam and Niall admitted our noises was so loud than other. Aside from that, all I could feel was joy, happiness, exited, crazy, amazed and some kind of that been mixed make my body turn, my eyes burned from crying. Happy crying.

We went back at 12 night and directly to the airport cause my plane flight on 1.45. We arrived at maybe 1. I both with Lia said goodbye to Mia, shared hugs and kisses then left. We waited for 45 minutes. When I was waiting I was so tired from the jumping and screaming so I decided to lay down at the chair, didnt care about people looked like I was grazy girl who lay to the 3 seats.

I close my eyes but interupted by Lia who screamed like hell. I asked her why and she answered me by saying that Zayn left the group. Officially. I didnt believe her until she showed me the statement on official facebook of 1D it self. I was shocked cause I love Zayn. He’s good and had the highest note from all.

But yup. It didnt bother me that much cause all I loved was about Harry who is still in 1d until now.

We landed on my city right about 5.30 morning. I was rushed cause I had to go to school 7 cause there this assistant of lecturer who was scared and I just couldn’t be late. My father picked me and I couldn’t go because I didnt want to left Lia alone. Until her father come up so I went back home asked my dad to rush.

Arrived at home I run to my room and had a fastes bath of my life. Rush to the school. I was so glad I didnt late and some of my friend was late. They were shocked saw me sitting on my chair. I mean, last night was the best night I’ve ever spent and here I was going school and all.

Yes that was amazing. I know.

Oh yeah. Not forget another crazier that happened. Lia, my friend was having final test at the exact day of the concert. And no one expect what she did, that was.. she asked her friend to pretend to be her and doing her test.

Yah that was crazier than me. But she ended up passed the final test well.

[werewolfdays]

5,8, 12 for the touch prompts?

god sorry I’m taking forever to answer these, but here ya go!

5. With an apology:

(I couldn’t resist a little pre-relationship adorableness with this one)

“Have you ever hit someone?” I asked Nadya as we faced each other in the middle of an abandoned park we picked out for a short training session. 

She shook her head, looking slightly embarrassed, “I’ve never really had the need to.” 

A hint of a smirk tugged at the corner of my mouth. There wasn’t any reason for her to be self conscious about her lack of physical confrontations, I was actually pretty relieved that she hasn’t been forced to defend herself, but the way her cheeks flushed even more was too cute to not take some pleasure in.

I pushed my amusement aside and patiently nodded, “Well, I hope you won’t ever have the need to, but it can’t hurt to know the right way to throw a punch.” 

“I guess so.” Nadya said, still sounding a little unsure. 

“It could save your skin one day.” I pointed out. 

The bright smile she gave me lightened the mood, “I know. You’re right.”

“Okay,” I said enthusiastically and grabbed her hand. Once I brought it up, I put my hand over hers, gently urging her fingers to close into a fist. Then I grabbed her thumb, “You always want your thumb on the outside, not the inside. Like this.” I placed her thumb on the back of her fingers, “That way you won’t accidentally break your own thumb when you deck someone or something.” 

Nadya had gone almost completely still, only managing a curt nod. That’s when I realized I had touched her without thinking. I was still touching her without thinking. Now that I noticed our contact, my skin started to tingle and prickle, my wolf becoming a bit restless under my skin. I tried to play it off like it was nothing, but I was unsure if I should let her go or not. I knew I didn’t want to let her go, though I also didn’t want her to be uncomfortable. After a prolonged awkward moment, I released her hand and swallowed hard before taking a step away from her. 

I cleared my throat and held up my own fist to show her, “And, uh, don’t bend your wrist.” 

She blinked at me for a moment and I saw something flicker in her eyes. Could it have been… disappointment? Before I could think about it too much, she shook the moment off and looked down at her fisted hand, flicking her wrist back and forth with a frown, “I thought you wanted to hit with your knuckles?”

“You do.” I confirmed.

“When my wrist isn’t bent, it’s the back of my fingers. That’s pretty flat.” Nadya showed me what she was talking about. 

“It’s about the angle you punch at. Here,” I risked stepping into her space again and tentatively reached for her, “Can I?”

This time I was positive I heard her heart pick up for a few beats, but she still nodded, “Sure.” 

I grabbed her forearm and straightened her wrist, trying not to be distracted by being in contact with her again, “So, you keep it straight—”

“Unlike me?” Nadya quipped. 

It took me off guard enough that I barked out a laugh, “Yes, the only part of you that has to be straight is your wrist. And only when you punch someone.” 

“Well, I was never very good at it, but I’ll try.” 

My chuckle lingered and I angled her arm in the right way to utilize her knuckles. She nodded and I went on to the next step, “When you’re throwing a punch, you wanna put your weight into it. That’s part of what can make a blow powerful.”

“Makes sense.” 

“Mhm.” I fit her fist into the palm of my hand that I held in front of her, “Go on, use your weight to push against my hand.” 

Nadya leaned into her arm and pushed. If I had used my full strength, my hand would not have budged at all, but it was important for the lesson that I eased up. It amused me that I could feel Nadya hold back because she knew exactly how strong I was. But I could see in her eyes that she still didn’t want to risk hurting me. 

“Keep it up.” I urged. 

With my words of encouragement, she pursed her lips and finally gave it all she had. My hand trembled slightly under the strain as it was gradually pushed back towards my shoulder. Her smile grew into a grin at the same time mine did. 

“Good.” 

My praise kept that stunning smile on her face when she relaxed. “I can feel the difference.” 

“Told you. Let’s work on your stance.” I squared up to show her what it should look like and Nadya mimicked me almost perfectly. “Nice. Make sure your feet are shoulder-width apart.” I started to slowly walk around her to get a better look at her form, “Bend your knees a little more. That’s it. Keep your left shoulder facing your opponent.” 

“I didn’t think there was so much to this.” Nadya commented. 

“Don’t worry, it’ll become second nature once we train more.” Satisfied with her stance, I made my way around to face her and held both of my hands up, offering them as targets, “Now, give it your best shot.” 

“Are you sure?” 

I raised an eyebrow, “Don’t hold back.” 

Nadya hesitated for a second and then swung her fist towards one of my hands. It connected with a smacking sound, the force of which stung just a tiny bit. I smiled and nodded her on. Another punch was laid into my other hand with her non-dominant arm, but it was still a pretty solid hit. 

It didn’t take her too long to fall into an almost mindless rhythm. Of course that gave me the opportunity to get distracted by her presence. The determined furrow in her brow was something I very much enjoyed looking at, and she was close enough for her scent to envelope me. Comforting autumn spices paired perfectly with the scents of nature around us, filling me with a sense of contentment in this moment with her. Then a strained breath escaped her mouth and I felt my body grow weak. 

Not only did it lower my guard, but it started to lower my hands. Nadya was mid-swing and didn’t notice in time, her flying fist scraped past my hand and connected with my jaw. I grunted and stumbled backwards a single step, not expecting her strike to be that hard. Nadya’s eyes widened in shock, snatching her hands back to cover her mouth as she gasped sharply at her misfire. 

I touched the area she hit, chuckling at the slightly numb feeling. If anything, this made me even more attracted to the human. 

“Oh, my god.” Nadya quickly reached for me, “Jayde, I am so sorry! I swear, I didn’t mean to.” 

“Nadya, it’s okay, it’s fine.” I reassured her through an amused laugh. 

Her hands carefully cupped my face, causing my whole body to stiffen while she inspected the reddening spot, “No, that was all my fault, I’m so sorry.” 

My breath caught in my throat when I felt her thumb caress my jawline, as if to soothe away any potential bruise in an apology. The sensation felt better than anything I could have imagined. I wanted to close my eyes and feel it with more clarity. I wanted to touch her in the same way, see those warm brown eyes soften under my caresses. 

It took me a few seconds to compose myself enough to reply, “Really, it’s fine. I’ve had worse, I promise.” 

“Are you sure? God, what if there’s a bruise?” She continued to fuss over me like I had been gravely injured. 

I hated to do it, but I gently grabbed her wrists and pulled her hands away from my face so she would meet my gaze, “Nadya. I’ll live.” 

Her cheeks flushed in embarrassment once more, “Okay… I’m just… I’m really sorry.”

“Don’t be.” I told her with confidence, “It was a damn good hit.” 

I watched as a smile slowly formed across her lips. “If you say so.” 

“I do.” I reluctantly released her and returned to my position as a target, “Ready to go again?” 

“What if I accidentally hit you again?” 

“Then I’ll congratulate you because I’m on high alert now.” I said with a wink. 

Nadya rolled her eyes and raised her fists. “Okay, I’m ready.”

8. To protect: this one was answered here!

12. On a scar:

(This one could technically be called a part 2 to this snippet I posted almost two years ago. I’m a sucker for angst and was thinking about this part of their timeline again)

“It started off as mostly just me working the clinic on my own, but soon others that have medical training decided to help me out. There’s this guy, Malcolm, that’s been a big help. He’s actually more trained than I am, but he can’t be on site very often, so he teaches me sometimes and gives me things to study.” 

Jayde silently nodded beside me on the bed. Being alone again, after a long day of reunions and catching up with everyone, finally gave us some more time to catch up with each other. I still couldn’t believe she was here. I was expecting to wake up and find that all of this wasn’t real, like all of the dreams I’ve been having lately. Being able to touch her and talk to her and see her smile, was something that even these long months of mourning couldn’t make me stop missing. 

God, I missed her so much. 

I had no clue I could miss another person as much as I missed Jayde. It was the most pain I have ever been in because I was certain I would never get to see her again. She was someone I thought would never go away— I needed her to never go away, and then I lost her just like that. I knew that there would always be something missing inside of me as soon as she was gone. A large dark pit that I would feel every moment, through every heavy breath, that would never be able to heal. 

But she was here, laying beside me in bed, and staring up at me so intently like every single word I said, no matter how pointless, was the most important thing for her to hear. This was obviously too good to be true, but maybe… just maybe, I could allow myself to believe in it for a little while. Because having her back, even in a dream, was better than being without her. 

“I try to keep my training up when I’m not at the clinic or studying.” I played absentmindedly with her hand in my lap. It felt so good to touch her again. I traced every line in her palm while I continued, “I knew you’d want me to be safe and ready for anything.” 

“Yeah,” Jayde agreed softly, a small smile coming across her lips, “I’m really proud of you, Nadya. I was so worried about holding you back, but I should’ve known better.” 

I didn’t really like that last sentence or the flicker of guilt I saw in her eyes, “You’ve never held me back, Jay. You’ve always pushed me forward. I haven’t made it this far in spite of you, it’s because of you. Don’t you ever think otherwise.” 

Her gentle smile grew, “I didn’t mean for it to sound like that, I just…”

“I know.” I nodded in understanding, bringing her hand up so I could kiss her scarred knuckles, “Just remember how much I’ve always needed you.”

“You’ve never needed me.” 

“You’re wrong.” I replied, not breaking our eye contact. 

After a beat, Jayde looked away to fidget with my fingers, “Maybe we both have always needed each other.” 

I nodded and the room grew quiet. Jayde seemed to melt into the bed even more and I knew she had to be drained from today. There were so many emotions being felt from everyone, I can imagine that it must have been a lot for her to take in right now. Especially after everything she’s been through just to get back here. Jayde deserved to have as much rest as she needed, and as much as I wanted her to stay up with me, I wanted her to get some sleep even more. 

“Why don’t you close your eyes?” I urged with the back of my finger brushing against her cheek. 

She hummed, tilting her head towards me and wrapping her arm around my lap to pull me closer, “Aren’t you tired too?” 

I shifted my body down from my sitting position so I could lie next to her and simply shook my head. 

We stared at each other for a quiet minute and I took the time to study her features yet again. I had been relieved to see that she mostly looked the same. The only thing different about her were the signs of damage that have healed since I last saw her. My hand came up to trace a new scar across the bridge of her nose with the tip of my thumb. A part of me tensed, remembering her bloodied face when I found her on the street that night, remembering the blood all over my hands, and I started to feel that fear creep up my throat again. 

What if this isn’t real?

“What is it?” Jayde asked while she studied my expression, pulling me away from the darkness. 

I shook my head again, feeling more relief when her hand worked its way under my shirt to caress my side, “It’s nothing.” 

“Nadya.” She said knowingly. 

“I had a dream about you a while ago.” I started after a long pause, “I woke up beside you and started crying because you were here. You asked me why I was crying, so I told you that I lost you, and you told me that was ridiculous because you would never leave me.” My voice cracked at the memory of that pain, so fresh that I could still feel it constricting my heart even though Jayde was right in front of me, “I said that I didn’t think you wanted to, but you were still gone anyway. You tried to convince me that it was just a dream and told me to go back to sleep, only, when I did, I woke up to realize that you really were gone.” 

“Oh, Nadya…” Jayde whispered, sounding incredibly pained. She reached out to wipe away a couple of stray tears that fell from my eyes before setting her warm hand on my cheek. 

“So,” The simple touch made my voice waver even more and I squeezed my eyes shut, “If I go to sleep and wake up to see that this isn’t real… I don’t know how I’ll...” 

“Nadya, look at me,” Hearing my name come out of her mouth again tethered me to her like gravity tethers me to the earth. My name flowing so gently out of her lungs reminded me that I wouldn’t float away into the emptiness. I opened my eyes to gaze into those gorgeous midnight blue irises as they were glittering with her own tears, “You see me? You feel me?” Her thumb caressed my face and she waited until I nodded, “This is real. And it’s not going anywhere.” 

“Yeah… yeah, okay.” There was still some reluctance within me, but I took solace in our contact. I missed the comforting heat of her body and the way her scent soothed my soul. If all of my senses confirmed that she was in front of me, then it had to be true. Right? 

“I’ll stay awake with you.” 

“No, no,” I replied quickly, feeling guilty for making her feel like she had to cater to my needs when I should be the one to take care of her after all she’s been through, “You get some sleep, I’m fine.” 

“I don’t mind, Nadya.” Jayde said warmly. 

“I know you don’t,” I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers, becoming instantly overwhelmed with the sensation of kissing her again. I never wanted to stop kissing her. We had six months to make up for. “But I do.” I muttered against her lips, “You need to rest.” 

“Well, how can I now?” Jayde replied with a smile that I felt in between kisses, and she pushed me on my back to settle herself on top of me. 

I giggled as she started kissing all over my face, unbelievably happy that she was being a little playful again. I wrapped my arms around her lower back to hold her to me and my hands wandered under her shirt to feel the way her skin grew warmer under my touch as her wolf stirred within. Her lips traveled downwards, dragging lightly along the sensitive skin on my neck, causing goosebumps to prickle all over my body at the sensation. Then I felt her teeth and tongue make the barest and gentlest graze against my throat, a shiver starting at the base of my spine and cascading upwards to my chest where I held my breath. 

All I wanted was to let myself get lost in her like I had earlier, let every single one of her touches convince me that this was real, but I didn’t want to be too selfish with her when I knew she was tired. 

I sighed and brought her up to kiss her again, allowing myself just a bit more time to indulge in everything I missed about this, and then pushed her back a couple inches. “Sleep.” I commanded softly. 

Jayde smiled down at me and gave me one more long peck before saying, “Okay,” and burying her face in my neck. She inhaled deeply and released a sigh that seemed to deflate her whole body until she was completely slack on top of me. “I love you.” 

The words were quiet and somewhat muffled, but I still heard them clearly. The large wound in my heart from losing her healed some more. Having her back wasn’t an instant fix for my pain, but every single moment with her, every touch and every word, began to refill the empty pit inside of me. I held onto her tighter, afraid that she would fade away and set my recovery back to zero, “I love you too, Jay.” 

It would be so easy to let myself drift off with her, and I wanted to so badly, but I knew I could not allow myself to. If my eyes were closed for more than a few minutes, my fear would bubble up from my chest, making me hold Jayde a little tighter and force my eyes wide open. I stayed up for hours, occupying myself with watching her sleep or lightly caressing her to make sure she remained lulled. It wasn’t so bad when she looked and felt so peaceful against me. 

Eventually, she rolled over to her side of the bed, and I took some freedom of movement to pick up the book on my nightstand in an effort to make sure I stayed awake. I knew I’d have to sleep eventually, but not tonight. Maybe a full twenty-four hours of her in my sight would be enough to reassure my deeply rooted anxiety. 

I started to really feel exhaustion tug at me once the first signs of dawn illuminated our room. My eyelids grew heavier the harder I tried to fight it off. I knew the battle was lost as soon as I noticed my novel slowly tipping downwards onto my chest. It wouldn’t matter how much I felt like I needed to stay awake, my body was persistent in its call for sleep. I gave Jayde’s unconscious form one more glance, letting myself see that she was safe and sound right up against me, before I finally allowed my eyes to close. 

After an undetermined amount of mostly dreamless sleep, I woke up and instinctively reached out for Jayde beside me. It was a habit I picked up when we first got together and one I couldn’t shake after I lost her. Even after months and months, I would still look for her when I awoke, only to have the memory of her loss hit me like a truck all over again once I realized she wasn’t there. This time she would be though. She had to be. 

But my hand found emptiness on the bed beside me. 

No, no, no...

A panicked jolt immediately went through my body. Please, don’t do this to me again. I turned over to frantically search for her, but my vision confirmed that Jayde wasn’t where I last saw her. The space next to me was barren and cold, just like it’s been for the past six months. Just like every morning I woke up hoping she was by my side. 

The grief came crashing down on top of me in a massive tidal wave, utterly crushing me down to my very soul. This time it was just as painful as the day I was dragged away from her broken body lying in the darkened street. Every inhale I took was suddenly excruciating, as if the simple act of breathing oxygen would kill me, and my heart ached bad enough that I almost wanted to beg for it to stop beating just so I could be free from it. It was the cruelest thing the universe could make me feel, but I only had myself to blame for being dumb enough to believe she was actually here. 

“Nadya?”

Everything within me stilled, besides the tears that rolled down my cheeks. Then I willed myself to turn towards that beautiful voice. Jayde was coming out of the bathroom, looking slightly ragged with water dripping down her face like she had splashed herself with it, but she was very much alive. Very much here. 

Profound relief washed over me so powerfully that I released my breath in a choked sob and reached out for her as she made her way to me, “I-I thought you were—” 

“No.” Jayde said firmly with a quick shake of her head and fell to her knees at the edge of the bed, “I’m here. I’m right here.”  

One of my hands tangled in her hair while the other gripped her shoulder until I hand a fistful of her shirt in my grasp. I pulled her close to rest our foreheads together and tried to regain control of my rampant tears, but even the physical reminder of her presence couldn’t banish them quite yet. Jayde held on to me too, her body tensed as I rode out this moment of incredible pain mixed with intense relief. 

Then her lips were on mine in a fierce and uncomposed kiss. I struggled to return it for several moments, as I was caught in between sobs, but being distracted by her passionate reassurance was gradually calming me down. After a minute, I felt myself soften against her and was able to deepen the kiss by slowing our cadence down and parting her lips with mine. Her taste melded with the saltiness of my tears, but it was still her that I was tasting and I wouldn’t let myself forget that. 

“I love you.” I whimpered against her mouth. 

Jayde pulled back to look at me and I gazed right back at her. Her face was still a little wet, but my eyes were drawn to the scar I traced earlier on the bridge of her nose. Something about it was somehow reassuring. I guess knowing that I committed it to memory it before I fell asleep made her seem more real to me now. I mimicked that gentle touch again, this time brushing the tip of my index finger over the small marred line, and then went to trace another one. Mapping the remnants of damage on her skin grounded me further and reminded me of all that she’s survived. Reminded me that she was still alive. 

It took me a good minute to notice my breathing and rapid heart rate had returned to normal. When I did, I sighed heavily and leaned into her again, “I’m sorry.” 

“There’s nothing to be sorry for.” Jayde replied quietly and kissed my forehead. 

The expression I had seen on her face when she came out of the bathroom finally caught up with me and I pulled back, “Are you okay?”

She gave me a small sad smile, “I had a moment.” 

That explained why her face was wet. I’ve seen her use cold water to try and bring herself out of a panic attack in the past. My hand cradled the side of her face and she reached up to wrap her fingers around my wrist. “We’re both messed up, aren’t we?” 

A quiet beat passed between us and then we both let out soft chuckles. 

“I guess we don’t really have a choice then.” When I gave her a curious look, she continued, “We’re just gonna have to get through this together.” 

My grin grew wider, my heart feeling full for the first time in a long time, “I guess you’re right.” 

[clansayeed]

Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ― Chapter 3: The Truth

PAIRING: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Nadya Al Jamil) RATING: Mature

⥼ MASTERLIST ⥽

⥼ Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ⥽

While struggling with nightmares of lives she’s never lived, a shadow from the past looming over her city, and the proposed idea that her life may just be a little bit too weird to handle alone, Nadya makes sure to tell herself that everything is perfect just the way it is. If only. When the self-proclaimed King of Vampires (and Maker of her sometimes-girlfriend and always-boss, can’t forget that little tidbit) Gaius Augustine returns intent on claiming Manhattan as the throne that was promised, she and her friends find themselves forced into the task of saving the world. But with millennia-old vampires and an Order of hunters on their heels as well as allies hiding catastrophic secrets at their backs… it won’t be an easy task. Too bad destiny didn’t exactly ask for her input.

Bound by Destiny II and the rest of the Oblivion Bound series is an ongoing dramatic retelling project of the Bloodbound series and spin-off, Nightbound. Find out more [HERE].

*Let me know if you would like to be added to the Destiny II tag list!

⥼ Chapter Summary ⥽

As it turns out the Trinity is still in New York. A desperate Nadya agrees to meet Valdas and his promise of answers, but is she ready for the truth behind her visions?

[READ IT ON AO3]

Nadya, Lily, and Jax agree to wait until the seventh and final night of Valdas’ offer.

So, naturally, Nadya goes the night before on her own.

The vampire watches her with an uncomfortable curiosity. It doesn’t carry the usual weight of immortality she associates with him. A year ago he moved like every limb was dragging Atlas’ burden by iron chains but now he’s… well he’s just different.

“You know, I was convinced you would wait until the last day to come.”

Nadya shifts uncomfortably in her chair. “I can go if you want,” though she really can’t and hopes he doesn’t take her up on it, “and come back tomorrow.”

“No no, that isn’t what I meant at all. I’m merely surprised. Help remind me to ask for cash back when we’re finished here, would you? I owe Isseya a few hundred for the bet.”

There’s something just… so wrong about a man over two thousand years old talking about ‘cash back.’  Maybe that’s why Kamilah always insists on paying where Nadya can’t see.

But the mention of his partner makes Nadya uneasy. They’ve always been joined at the hip. “She won’t be joining us?”

Valdas shakes his head. “No, not tonight at least. I thought it best we keep this an intimate affair.”

“Ew.”

He gives her a chastising look but says nothing more on it.

Nadya doesn’t know what she was expecting; what she would have done if she had waited for her friends to come along as backup, or if she’d sucked it up and told Adrian and Kamilah about going behind their backs in the worst way. It’s not hard to imagine their looks of disappointment.

Even not knowing what to expect, though, didn’t mean Nadya had prepared herself for a place that’s actually kind of cute. An inside that smells like fresh coffee grinds and vanilla and a surprisingly decent bit of sidewalk real estate gated off with a wooden fence painted glossy black.

Not that any of that eases her worry. She’s prepared herself for the worst — tenses up at every passerby, catches herself halfway reaching for the stake in her purse when the vampire across so much as shifts in his seat.

Only Valdas is the epitome of a gentleman. He plays the part he’s dressed for almost too well. Still, Nadya reminds herself not to be fooled, not even for a second. She’s seen what he can become; what he can do. Sometimes she still tastes Vega’s ashes tickling at the back of her throat.

He glances up at the strings of yellowed lights crossed aimlessly over their heads. “It’s a rather charming place, wouldn’t you say? And, I hope, agreeable to your anxieties. Though I wish you would have let me take you somewhere —”

“Somewhere what,” interrupts Nadya; words bursting with accusation, “somewhere secluded and private, or with leather and torture devices?”

Valdas raises a single dark eyebrow in an ‘are you quite finished?’ way and no, she’s not — not by a long shot. But she’s willing to admit (silently, to herself, not out loud whatsoever) she might be making it worse for herself at this point.

Especially when he answers.

“Somewhere proper; with enough courses to get us through what I’m sure will be a difficult if enlightening conversation for you and I to have, Nadya.”

Yeah, especially then.

“Oh. No — this is fine.”

Someone clears their throat behind her; makes Nadya almost jump out of her seat in a heart attack. The barista does his level best not to laugh at her while he adjusts his tray bearing a steaming mug on a saucer and a plate of tiny finger sandwiches. “Oh, we didn’t —”

“Here will be fine,” Valdas pushes his folded newspaper aside, “thank you.”

He’s young; one of those obviously-New York types with several studs in his ears and a streak of blue in his blond hair, and likely a long-time server judging by the way his face goes red at Valdas’ simple act of common decency. Run, she wants to shout because she’s seen that darkly alluring smile before and nothing good can come of it, run while you still can.

Instead Nadya mouths a voiceless thanks. They are left alone.

“I didn’t order anything.”

“I took it upon myself.”

“But you didn’t know which night I would show up.”

“Indeed. After the third night they knew my order by heart.” He glances appraisingly towards the inside cafe — Nadya on the other hand can’t focus on anything but their reflections in the glass. “It’s hard to find attention to detail like that these days outside of hired help.”

With pursed lips Nadya pushes the latte away. “You really shouldn’t have. I can’t —”

“It’s soy milk, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Uhm, what? Yeah — only one of them finds her surprise funny and hint; it’s not Nadya.

“At the Awakening Ball, shortly after our first introductions. You were rather loudly threatening Raines and Sayeed with what I believe was a platter of artisan cheeses?”

“That’s… very diligent of you.” Creepy. It’s creepy. It’s so so freakin’ creepy.

Valdas gives a soft snort of amusement. “I’m old, Nadya, but not antiquated. In fact I’ve been looking for someone to discuss the latest season of The Crown & the Flame with, should you have time after our business is concluded.”

“That’s not —” This is so getting out of hand; more than that its wasting time.

She can’t let this chance slip through her fingers. “What are you trying to do? I didn’t come here to have small talk or drink coffee or talk TV, and I’m pretty dang sure that’s not why you invited me but if it is then tell me now because I don’t have time for it.”

“Very well,” he says just a little too flippantly for her growing irritation, “I thought you might be more comfortable this way. I apologize.”

“Apology only accepted if you start talking.”

The vampire leans forward a little too quickly for Nadya’s liking. All that arrogance, immortality; suddenly so plain on his expression he might as well have ‘VAMPIRE’ painted on his forehead.

It takes everything in her not to move away.

So many questions and now she can finally get her answers. But it leaves Nadya a bit stalled on where to start. But Valdas stays eerily patient.

Okay, big questions. “Am I dying?”

“You’re mortal, you are dying from the moment you’re birthed.” Which is not the answer Nadya’s looking for and he knows it. “But no, not more than any other.”

“Do you plan on killing me?”

“No; you are far too valuable for that.”

“What does that mean?”

Valdas carefully chooses every word to answer; “It means… that we are very happy you are alive, Nadya.” And his not-answers feel a little too close on the family tree to Nadya’s mostly-truths.

Though if he thinks she missed that “we” thing he’s very much mistaken.

“So my nightmares, what exactly are they?”

He’s too casual — plucking one of the sandwiches on the tray and nibbling it idly. Nadya entertains the image of her throwing it in his face… it’s a nice one.

“Nightmares, you say? So the visions only come to you when you sleep?”

“Visions?”

“Visions, mental images, nightmares — name them what you will but they are the same thing. Events you never witnessed, lives you never lived…”

“People I’ve never killed?”

The words come out of her so scared, so broken; and Nadya’s almost angry for it. A sound so pitiful that even Valdas — the same man who threatened Jax so easily, hurt Adrian and Kamilah so easily, killed Vega so easily — lets sympathy slip through the seams of him.

“And those, yes. They are all a part of you; they have been all your life even if you were once unaware, and they will remain that way from this day to your last day.”

Nadya shakes her head so hard it hurts. “No. No way I — I can’t feel like this forever. I won’t survive it. I… I won’t. I feel less and less like me every time I wake up. There won’t be enough of me left.” I worry there isn’t enough already.

And he really sits there without an answer for her? Two thousand years and this is all he’s good for; making her feel like her life is already over? What good is it to live for so freakin’ long if it can’t help her; save her?

“What did you do to me,” it feels good to ask; really good — better than she’s felt in a while, “why did you do it? How do I stop it, or make it hurt less, or make it happen less, or —”

“Forgive me —” —she doesn’t— “— but… you believe I am somehow responsible for these visions? When I just told you they were yours from your first breath.”

“Well what else am I supposed to think?” Nadya snaps. “My head almost explodes, you do some weird psychic mojo that makes it better but also makes it worse, and the last thing your bonkers girlfriend—who conveniently isn’t here—says to me is “enjoy my gift?” I gotta say — that all seems pretty freakin’ responsible to me!”

The last time she raised her voice at Valdas, Nadya had Kamilah and Adrian combined to back her up. Yet here she is, no immortality at her back, and honestly she doesn’t even care.

“I am scared, okay? So, so scared — scared enough that I’m doing stupid things that I know I shouldn’t be doing, lying to the people I love, going behind their backs and putting myself in danger and you know why?”

“Because fear is an irrational motivator.”

“Shut up. It’s because I would do all of that again and again and again if it helps me find a way to make this stop. If it takes away all of these horrible feelings that aren’t even my own and… and stops tearing me up inside.”

Who are you, Nadya asks herself, because they may be her words in her voice but they’re so wrong — so not Nadya. And that just adds onto her already existing fear.

It’s not fair.

None of this is fair.

Valdas waits until Nadya catches her breath; until he can hear the slowing down of her heart. “Are you quite done?”

“I dunno,” her face is still flushed, “but… sorry.”

“Whatever for?”

“For telling you to shut up.” Because she’s pretty dang certain if anyone else had tried that they wouldn’t have gotten to finish saying their piece.

But she did. Valdas let her get it out until she was pink in the face and more than a little hot under her coat collar despite the bitter night breeze. Why?

“No one should ever feel the need to apologize for their grief.”

Nadya glances up from her white-knuckled hands; but Valdas isn’t there — not mentally, anyway. His focus is far off and distant… millennia away. “Grief is a complex thing felt in complex ways. It kills us inside… but the pain of it is proof we are alive, too.”

“I’m not grieving though. I can’t grieve. I have to hope there’s a way to fix it.”

“If my efforts to ebb the storm still leave you this way Nadya, I must admit I’m doubtful of it.”

How is it something so bleak leaves her so breathless?

“What do you mean,” she chokes out, “what—what efforts?”

“The ones you would so quickly write off as malice. Though I suppose I’ll give you one thing — my beloved Iss’ has a knack for making most things sound malicious.”

“That’s an understatement…” and apparently the only bad thing he’ll ever say about her, “so—so wait. I don’t… I don’t understand.”

Valdas does the decent thing and turns his face away, but that doesn’t mean Nadya misses the color me surprised raised brow.

“Psychic prominence can be innate, yes, but when you reach a certain age most talents are easily learned. I had hoped the web I was allowed to spin in your mind that night at the Musea Sanguis would hold long enough to bring us to this point naturally. Sadly this was not the case.”

He offers his hand out palm-up between them. He could just as easily take what he wants from her but no, he’s offering.

And the more she thinks about it the more Nadya realizes Valdas had done the same that night. “I thought… when I touched this—this column I could’ve sworn I… that something to do with you had…”

Valdas nods with growing understanding.

“Well that’s to be expected. When psychic abilities grate up against one another it’s a bit like grit-paper on stone; the outer layer of the stone crumbles into a fine powder, yes? The influence that was being pressed unto you turned you into the grit — the rest of the world; your stone.”

“So it’s all in… in touch?” Nadya looks down at her hands as she asks.

“No, but given the borders of your capabilities…” The curl of his fingers draws them both down to watch. “Physical contact is a tether in any instance. But objects have memories just like people do, Nadya. And we vampires are an odd in-between of the two.

“I could show you — if you wish.”

Their fingertips couldn��t be more than four—five inches apart. But to Nadya it looks like miles; like ages stretching out across the tabletop.

Two thousand years of history, of life; of love. And the very idea of inducing this terror upon herself has Nadya actually questioning her sanity — and rightly so. But there’s a power in it, too; in controlling it, not letting it control her.

The last of her reservations are dashed when her mind unhelpfully supplies the memory of Kamilah in the penthouse kitchen — hands hesitant to hold her, to hurt her; fear hidden in the familiar dark of her eyes, fear both of and for Nadya. Because she’s not torturing herself enough already, apparently.

“You don’t have to. The choice is yours.” Really though — is it?

No. “No, it’s not.”

Nadya sucks in a deep breath and dives in headfirst by giving Valdas her hand.

In his dreams they do this bathed in sunlight. But dreams are for the young and the innocent. He is the Made-God Valdemaras and he is neither.

The rapier catches in the grooves of his vest and bends dangerously close to snapping. Behind him, Isseya laughs giddy and without care.

“You know, you really should be cheering on your Maker, darling girl.”

Valdas rounds on her but she meets him petulantly prideful. “Should I? Lucky for me that I am free to champion whomever I wish.”

“Fair enough. I would champion him too, if I could.”

They both look to watch him pull the ribbon from his hair; it falls damp around his shoulders — little golden wisps clinging to the sweat on his forehead. The exhaustion of his efforts flashes bright in the deep red of his eyes but his smile is as unwavering as his beauty.

“I’m flattered, truly,” Cynbel croons to the pair of them, “but that would leave me with no one worthy of a good spar and you know how troublesome my spells of boredom can be.”

Likely that he thinks the wink he gives their girl is a charming one. But taken with him as they are their love does not blind them — not anymore.

“Indeed.” Valdas clicks his tongue and begins to undo the clasps of his suit. “But that is enough sparring for tonight, I think.”

“And what of my prize?”

Before he can say another word strong arms embrace him close; hold him in the rough-hewn fingertips that claim Valdas’ body as easily as they cradle it. When he looks up it’s to the familiar sight of adoring eyes; of endless devotion.

As if the kiss Cynbel steals from him doesn’t say as such enough on its own.

“Satisfactory?” Valdas asks his Golden Son — though he already knows the answer.

“Rather I would call it divine.”

He decides he will commit this, right here, to the parts of his memory that will never wane with the ages.

At the very least he is owed that. They all are.

Nadya and Valdas realize it at the same time. The trembling of their joined hands isn’t Nadya’s fault at all, but rather the rarest and greatest slip of the vampire’s composure.

But he doesn’t let her go. He can’t, she accepts solemnly, because this wasn’t about showing me anything. It was about seeing.

It was about him.

So Nadya spares him the indignity and brings her hand back to rest in her lap. Valdas startles as if from a deep sleep; runs his hands over his face and Nadya can’t help but hurt for him as she watches that careful mask slide back into place.

“Forgive me,” he clears his throat abruptly, “I wasn’t expecting you to be this, ahem, advanced — for you to be able to project the, erm —”

“‘No one should ever feel the need to apologize for their grief.’”

The vampire focuses on her sharply — the look he gives her makes her feel complex and worth studying. Or maybe she’s just feeling him still; feeling the things that break his heart with every passing day. When he realizes then that she’s sincere — that Nadya repeats his earlier sentiments because she believes they will heal him somehow — he visibly eases.

“You are wiser than your years, you know.”

“Lately they aren’t exactly my years though, are they?”

In her lap Nadya digs around in her purse and pulls out a small journal. Even just the sight of it makes her queasy but she has no one to blame but herself. When she tries to toss it down between them Nadya finds her grip only tightening — her fear of its discovery so innate she has a hard time letting it go even willingly.

Valdas sees this and reaches out; strangely careful to avoid touching Nadya directly as he pries it free. “What is this?”

“A journal.”

“Yes, I can see that.” He begins flipping through the book; eyes roaming over Nadya’s neat scrawl. Page after page of it; filled from top to bottom in various colored pens and then some. Tabbed notes and scribbled margins — but the closer he gets to the end the more chaotic the entries become.

Careful recall hours later turned into hasty ramblings in the throes of panic. The ravings of a mad woman.

“I don’t always remember,” explains Nadya, “but I write down what I can.”

“What you can remember?”

“What I can stomach.”

If anyone understands it would be him. He’s practically dripping in blood; it oozes from his pores just like his infallible persona. And Nadya hates that she knows this with certainty.

Valdas stops on a page near the end; leans forward intensely as he tries to decipher her cursive’s best impression of wet noodles. Do you know how hard it is to write with gel pens, hands shaking and slippery from sweaty palms, in a blacked out room when you can’t tell the difference between the pages and the bodies piling up before your eyes?

Pretty freakin’ hard.

The way he reads it though — like some riveting tale to stand the test of time. In a way it does, maybe. “I was here for this,” and he sounds a little too amused for her liking; nothing in that awful book is amusing, “we all were, even dear Kamilah. From the tone with which you write I would say this is the petit Lafayette’s account of the siege of his township.

“You write with great passion; ever considered a career in fiction?” He pushes the journal back her way with a single finger. Nadya practically snatches it up to be buried back in her bag. Underneath the work notepad and pens, her glasses case and the stake she is never without.

Only when her secrets are six feet under does Nadya relax.

“I wouldn’t dream of exposing the world to those terrible things.”

“The world has already been exposed to them.”

“Well I shouldn’t have been, but I didn’t really get the chance to choose did I?” Nadya stares at him hard. Valdas has the good sense not to justify a reply.

Already the city is well into bed with the night around them. The cafe window bathes the pair and the sidewalk in soft yellowing light but directly across the street neon pinks and blues flicker out of the corner of her sight.

How long have they been here, she wonders, but can’t muster up the courage to look at her phone. They have to know by now; they have to. Lily’s probably already GPSed her and they’re all on their way, crammed into Jax’s fake plumbing van, ready to jump out and hog tie Valdas while shoving a dirty rag into his mouth… actually maybe he’s on to something with this ‘fiction writer’ idea.

“Why didn’t I get to choose, Valdas?” Because he’s old — he’s so old which means he has to know. He has to. That’s why she’s here. That’s why she’s risking everything to be here.

“Rarely are we given the opportunity to choose our own destiny.”

“But it’s possible, right?”

He gives a reluctant nod. “Yes… for others. But not for you, Nadya. I would have thought this, here—tonight—had given you clarity of that.”

Clarity? More like the exact opposite. Nadya feels deeper in the fog than ever and that’s just fact. But is it so wrong for her to hold out even a crumb of hope?

Valdas sees this — her resistance — and maybe he even admires her for it. The man lifts his hand and Nadya readies herself to flinch away—don’t touch me pleasedon’ttouchme I don’t want to see any more please—but he hovers it just shy of her skin. So close he can feel the heat of her cheek against his palm.

“It’s unfortunate what little control you did have was taken from you so soon.”

“I don’t understand.”

His brow furrows. “I said as such, remember? You were always meant to walk this path but Jameson’s influence sped the world up beneath your feet; sent you along farther than you were meant to be.”

Shut the front door.

Nadya recoils so hard her chair legs scrape against the concrete loud and jarring. Suddenly all the little beautiful things around them — the lights, the baristas winding down inside, even the people just passing by beyond the gate — seem dull; lifeless.

“Ja—Jameson? What are you talking about?”

He had even agreed with her: it made sense to think Valdas was the one doing all the pulling of the strings. But okay — so it isn’t him. Jameson, though? “Jameson. Jameson, Jameson. Like the weird little librarian guy; the one from Adrian’s trial. That. Jameson.”

“Yes…” answers Valdas, and Nadya really isn’t a fan of how hesitant he says it, “He’s the only prominent psychic in the country. Moreso than myself, even.”

Holy… crap. Totally not a conclusion she would have even put under the ‘Extremely Unlikely Possibilities’ category — like at all. But the wild thing is the more the idea has time to marinate the more Nadya’s starting to get it. The more she’s starting to believe him because somehow it makes… sense?

“No,” no, remember who this is, remember how he lied so easily and condemned Adrian to death, “no no, that’s not… he’s a member of Kamilah’s clan!”

Which apparently is news. “Is he really? That’s surprisingly deceptive of him.”

Surprisingly deceptive. Ha!

This is too much to process. Nadya’s still reeling — she’s still him in a way, still feeling the pressure of his eternal life crushing her own heart in a stone grip. It doesn’t make sense and it also makes total sense; she just isn’t certain which one of them is real.

That doubt screams at her through the pain still growing. How dare you trust him, it growls; a monster hiding under the bed, after what he did to Adrian, after what they did to Adrian, to Kamilah, to you! Are you really so desperate and so far gone?

Of course she remembers his lies. So easy and flawless and done on the thinnest whim because of what — a rumor; a ghost hidden behind another man’s face? The pain he’d caused them all…

“You can’t expect me to trust you.”

“Perhaps not ‘expect’ so much as hope I’ve proven enough to you tonight that such trust comes willingly.”

“Do you really think it’s that easy?” She bites the words off her tongue in chunks of anger; frustration. “Or is it that you think I’m still just some dumb human who will believe the scary old vampire without even a question otherwise.”

“Quite the opposite. I think you resilient, resourceful, and yet reticent to act on impulse — when you’re of sound mind that is.”

“So you’re calling me nuts.”

“I’m saying the fault isn’t yours. And if you’re still hesitant to believe me then there’s a very simple way to prove the truth.”

The second time Nadya holds his hand is much less reluctant. Maybe part of her wants to get it over with. Maybe whatever’s left hopes she’ll find something wrong in him; his intentions. Like a validation.

She squeezes so hard it hurts her palm but what is feeble mortal strength compared to, well, him? And…

“Nothing?”

He keeps them connected — really just completely dedicated to this whole proving himself trustworthy thing, apparently. “Don’t sound so disappointed.”

But really; there’s nothing. Not the low-key anticipatory bombardment of visions and the feelings that come with them. Not voices or sensations that aren’t her own. And not even some weird warm glow of altruism either.

It’s comforting as much as it is worrisome but in the absence Nadya realizes just how tired she is.

“You’ve helped me, tonight.” There are so many things to tell Kamilah, Adrian. Finally a step closer and she gets to rub being right in their faces on top of it. “Really… really helped — maybe more than you know.”

His chin raises slightly. “Is that a ‘thank you?’”

“It’s a question.”

Why did you do it?

Valdas’ thumb tickles the bare skin of her wrist in gentle motions. It’s intimate — weirdly so. Which means Nadya is completely justified when she takes her hand back.

Until he squeezes tighter, that is.

“This was the last act of my own free will. Perhaps not forever—hopefully not forever; I’ve had quite a few forevers already and they are dreadfully long.”

Nadya tugs again in vain. It’s like a completely different man sitting across from her, now. Darker; deeper and digging deeper still. She doesn’t want to dig deeper, though, but the longer Valdas holds on the more the choice is taken from her.

Another thing taken from her.

Her voice cracks slightly. “Valdas… please let me go.” They’re still out in the open air but it breathes heavy and stifling in her lungs. Reeking of dust and mothballs and other old, ancient things.

It’s the Musea Sanguis all over again. The onyx coffin that haunts her nightmares — the ones that belong solely to Nadya Al Jamil.

She meets Valdas’ eyes and the fathoms of them are too many to count.

“I wanted to help you, Nadya. I wanted this, the act before the sin, to be one that mattered — one that meant something.”

“W-What sin?”

“Forgive me.”

“Val—”

He’s holding her too close — Nadya can’t pull back far enough. But someone, probably Kamilah — definitely Kamilah, should be proud of her that she struggles every moment.

“You don’t have to do this.”

“I wish that were the case.”

All the way up until his fingertips brush her temple and the world goes dark.

LINEHERE

In between waking and being awake there is a place where all is calm and well. Where she feels safe and warm and at peace. How often does she get that these days? Is it any wonder she clings to it desperately?

Long fingers brush through her hair. There is a warmth about them, even dark as they are — even though they haven’t seen the sunlight in so many years.

Lost, lonely — yet they comfort her even now.

Nadya opens her eyes and the first thing she sees is the shifting canopy of leaves overhead. No—not leaves. Dark green fabric, sheer and draped around the four posters at each corner of the bed and over her head like an old ritual dance. One that called upon forgotten things and spoke in relic tongues. She can taste the words of them; bright mint and heavy sage. All she need do is open her mouth.

“Ssh… not yet, my darling.”

The hand slips from her hair and Nadya keens at the loss. Turns towards where the touch might have come from like a child comforted in a storm.

The woman beside her has been wandering the dark for so long. Nadya can smell crisp groundwater on Her skin; salt on the back of Her tongue. The rich caramel of Her covered in the brightest white she’s ever seen.

“I’m scared,” Nadya tells Her. Is it possible to know a stranger all her life?

Perhaps it is. Just as it’s possible for the woman to laugh above her, face just out of sight, and for it to sound like every song she’s ever known or loved and also like nothing she’s ever had the luck to hear before.

“I know. But you must be brave.”

“I’m tired of being brave.”

“I was, too,” Nadya sighs as she feels an arm come around her shoulders; strong and more certain than she’ll ever be, “but that does not mean your trials are done. Be brave for yourself; and be brave for the both of us.”

She’s about to protest when the door opens on the other side of the room.

Nadya sits upright at the sound; fights through the waves of nausea and vertigo that wash over her and blind her with colorless spots of light behind her open eyes. She reaches out — waits for the stranger woman’s touch — but it doesn’t come.

When she can see everything right again Nadya doesn’t understand why she was waiting for someone there, anyway. The bed is barely rumpled. She’s alone.

“Ease yourself, Nadya. Your heart sounds like a racehorse.”

Oh, hell no.

She doesn’t have to see him to know the dark figure that watches her with the closed door at his back.

Valdas crosses the room in several long strides and holds something out to her. She knows the glint of her glasses in the otherwise dim light and snatches them from him; but tosses them onto the bedspread to be abandoned.

She doesn’t want to see him; the false sympathy in his eyes. He’s lied to Nadya enough already.

“Where am I?”

“Putting your glasses on might help.”

“I don’t want to look at your face.”

Valdas sighs. “Nadya…”

“Don’t you dare,” the rage that seethes from her clenched teeth surprises them both but gotta say — Nadya’s kind of a fan of it, “don’t. you. dare say my name like that. When you…”

She looks around again. Tries to keep dignified through wide eyes even though everything is a blur. Now it’s the principle of the thing. She can just make out the cut frame of the door beyond him.

Nadya spreads her fingers out on the coverlet like she’s searching. Can’t see Valdas’ face but she knows—she knows him maybe a little better than she knows herself right now. Just like she knows when he thinks he realizes what she’s doing and reaches out to grab them; to help her.

She clutches a blind hand desperately around the tassel of a pillow and whips it at his face as hard as she can.

“Asshole!”

The pillow does about as much damage to the millennia-old vampire as, well, a pillow would. But it gives her an opening and Nadya takes it.

Launches herself from the bed and hits the ground running; stumbling — her depth perception absolutely shot — but clear of him and with the black seam of freedom just barely in her sights.

It takes two steps for her to feel an ironclad weight clasping around her arm to pull her back.

“No—no nono!” Nadya screams; struggles against Valdas’ hold but the vampire is too strong. She might as well be trying to tear down a skyscraper with her bare hands.

He wraps both arms around her middle and knocks the breath from her lungs. But desperation — it’s a funny thing. Gives Nadya just that little kick of adrenaline she needs to keep fighting even if she chokes on every effort.

“Please stop this,” he growls in her ear, “the only one you’re hurting is yourself!”

“You’re insane. You’re a psychopath!” I’m a fool for trusting you.

“Nadya I can explain —”

“Don’t wanna hear it! Guh— lemme go!”

“I was the lesser of two evils I assure you!”

“Bull!” She pops her ankle and feels it collide between his legs with a fleeting satisfaction. Valdas crumples slightly, hisses at the pain that lances through him. Just enough for her to pry free and make another, equally mad dash for freedom.

The moment Nadya clutches at the door handle it jerks open; sends her flying backwards where she collides painfully with the rug.

“Grief, Valdas, she’s a fucking human child. How hard can it be?”

She almost doesn’t recognize Isseya at first — the proud woman of the abyss Nadya had last seen in the Council Chambers barely even a shadow flickered on her face.

In the time it takes the other vampire to assess the situation, though, Nadya is already scrambling ready to crawl her way out if that’s what it will take.

Valdas growls around his injury. “Iss’—”

“Yes yes, I’m not a fool.” Then Nadya screams, loud as she possibly can — tries to tear through the claw raking its way through her hair such a violent touch where was the kindness of the dark from before but it hurts too much too much and no matter how hard she hits Isseya’s grip doesn’t let up in the slightest.

She yanks Nadya up by her hair like a puppet on strings. “And I think you’ll find it a little bit harder to incapacitate me in such a way.”

“Let me go!”

“Need I even humor that with an answer?”

Valdas comes into view through the pain prickling at the edges of her vision. “Let her go, beloved.”

Behind her Isseya’s voice drips with irritation. “But —”

“Isseya. You know our orders.”

“Well I’ve harmed more than a few hairs on her head. Better to ask forgiveness, no?”

“No.”

Finally she’s released and the suddenness of it sends Nadya flying forward. Her hands and knees burning against thick wool fibers everything blurrier than blurry from the tears and she tries not to think too hard about the hairs she had felt torn from her head.

But, really, it’s her fault in the end — for thinking it was gonna be that easy.

When is anything ever that easy?

“Are you mostly unharmed?”

His legs come into her smudged view before Nadya can even blink. Valdas reaches out a hand in offering; she smacks it away instead. “Like I’d fall for that twice,” she mutters ragged; feels the last breaths of her screams for help itching in the back of her throat but knows, ultimately, they’re of no use. Standing alone is an effort but she manages it because she will not look weaker than she already is.

“Am I…” Nadya’s scoff is a bitter surprise in her mouth, “are you really doing this right now? Good vampire, bad vampire?”

“You think this is bad, just wait until the appetizer,” says Isseya — too close says Nadya’s entire nervous system and every hair on the back of her neck; has her jumping back but that puts her closer to Valdas and crap on a cracker they have her pinned.

“The appetizer being me, I’m guessing?”

To her surprise, the vampiress laughs. “No, I’d be looking forward to the evening far more if that were the case.”

The evening. It has Nadya running across the room to the large fuzzy shape of floor-to-ceiling curtains. There’s no way — absolutely no way it isn’t dawn yet.

And she’s kind of right. But this is one of those situations where that means about as much as being wrong.

The sherbet gradients of the setting sun bring a fresh wave of tears to her eyes. “It’s been… a whole day?” And they haven’t come for me? Not Adrian, not Kamilah… nobody?

Valdas, ever vigilant of the sun, is careful as he comes up beside her. Nadya’s glasses catch the light in his hand.

He almost sounds relieved when Nadya finally takes them, practically crushing the lenses against her face. “I confess I had hoped extending our evening would give them time to find you. But the years have made your friends soft and trusting.”

“What does that mean?

Isseya comes around to join them — awkward, all of them, too domestic for the pain she still feels at her failed escape — and keeps to the shadows too as she sits. She nods to the window. “Open your eyes, see for yourself.”

Nadya has to shade her eyes with her hand to see much of anything. Wherever they are there aren’t any buildings to block the path of light.

When the garden finally comes into view down below Nadya chokes on her own breath.

It takes a bit of searching but she finds the bridge and familiar pond just at the edge of her window’s view. It had been over a year now but suddenly it feels like no time has passed at all; like the Ball is still in full swing and she’s still Cinderella before the apocalypse.

At least she knows where she is now. Upstate New York; five hours’ ride by old-fashioned locomotive. She remembers the journey to Marcel’s castle and the Awakening Ball like it was yesterday.

[clansayeed]

Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ― Chapter 9: The Matriarch

PAIRING: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Nadya Al Jamil) RATING: Mature

⥼ MASTERLIST ⥽

⥼ Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ⥽

While struggling with nightmares of lives she’s never lived, a shadow from the past looming over her city, and the proposed idea that her life may just be a little bit too weird to handle alone, Nadya makes sure to tell herself that everything is perfect just the way it is. If only. When the self-proclaimed King of Vampires (and Maker of her sometimes-girlfriend and always-boss, can’t forget that little tidbit) Gaius Augustine returns intent on claiming Manhattan as the throne that was promised, she and her friends find themselves forced into the task of saving the world. But with millennia-old vampires and an Order of hunters on their heels as well as allies hiding catastrophic secrets at their backs… it won’t be an easy task. Too bad destiny didn’t exactly ask for her input.

Bound by Destiny II and the rest of the Oblivion Bound series is an ongoing dramatic retelling project of the Bloodbound series and spin-off, Nightbound. Find out more [HERE].

*Let me know if you would like to be added to the Destiny II tag list!

⥼ Chapter Summary ⥽

Cadence reveals the last person to hold the Amulet of Nero was Isadora de la Rosa; unfettered mafia boss and matriarch of the New Orleans vampires. And she isn't happy about a couple of out-of-towners wandering around her territory without permission.

[READ IT ON AO3]

Some might say Lily enjoys it a little too much.

Before they even step foot in Flechette they have to stop no less than five times to get her to calm down.

“Calm down — calm down?” The last time Nadya saw her like this was after Maricruz’s birthday, and no matter what Jax said she’s still not unconvinced a couple of the Shadow Den’s donors weren’t on something; if you catch her meaning.

“How could I possibly be calm at a time like this? Don’t you realize what’s happening Nadi’? We’re living a real life True Blood fantasy right now.”

“Yeah, see — don’t even think about mentioning that once we’re inside, please?” Cadence tugs at the collar of his shirt uncomfortably. “They know every reference, no matter how obscure. There are no strikes in a place like this; if you bring pop culture into their world they will kick us out — and that’s only if Izzy’s feeling generous.”

“Why do they care?” asks Nadya.

“For the misconception of it all. Flechette may be a cover, and Izzy is certainly no dominatrix. But most of their money these days comes from loyal customers and members. The de la Rosa dynasty is accustomed to a certain amount of wealth and status. Risk that… and it isn’t uncommon for you to go ‘missing.’”

Adrian’s surprise is quickly clouded by narrowed eyes and a stern frown. “That’s against your Accords, though, surely.”

“In the same way unauthorized Turning is against the rules of your Clans.”

That sobers Lily up pretty quickly. She and Nadya exchange glances; both trying to hide their worry from the other. But Lily pulls her a little bit closer by their linked arms and Nadya doesn’t exactly stop her.

Admittedly Nadya would feel a lot better if Katherine had joined them for this, too. But only claimed humans were exempt from what Cadence describes as a pretty lax ‘feeding policy’ beyond the club’s front doors. “And no,” the huntress hadn’t even given Nadya the breath to ask, “that’s not a thing Cade and I have done. I like my freedom a little too much for that.”

He looks her up and down warily; eyes lingering on her very healthy and very not-bitten neck. “You are claimed, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t feel a —”

“I said yes, Cadence,” she lifts her bracelet and lets the compass-esque charm of Clan Sayeed catch on the nearby neon lights. The hardest part is not letting it feel like a ball and chain weighing her down and reminding Nadya of her problems back home.

She’s got enough of those in front of her at the moment.

He acts as their local tour guide along the way; pointing out places and spaces every once in a while with a fun little factoid about the city’s histories; the ones both human and supernatural. It’s a good front — for most of their trip Nadya’s so interested in listening and imagining that she almost doesn’t notice what Cadence is really doing. It doesn’t hurt that the vampire sounds so sure of himself, too.

But then he’s halfway through a story about some stone troll (still yet to be seen, still yet to be believed) that tried to run for city Mayor and that’s neither distracting nor interesting. It’s just talking for the sake of talking.

“You’re rambling,” Nadya realizes — and realizes at the same time it was a much more astonishing revelation in her head than it is out loud, “like… nervous rambling.”

The blond scoffs. “What? If you weren’t interested all you had to do was —”

“Nope—I hear it too.” Lily’s eyes narrow, and beside her Adrian looks like he’s playing everything back on a mental tape recorder. “Trust me — I’ve lived with it long enough. That’s some Grade A tongue-twisting. Why’re you nervous?”

“I’m not… going to be able to convince you, am I?”

His blue eyes flicker to Adrian; some kind of Older Vampire Solidarity thing, but if Nadya and Lily are suspicious then Adrian sees no reason not to join in. Broad shoulders slump in his sweater and Cadence gestures for them to keep walking.

“I don’t hide that I have a history with the de la Rosas. When I first arrived in New Orleans the laws were far more lax and by all accounts Carlo let me off easy for coming onto his territory in secret.”

Lily’s eyebrows raise. “Even if you didn’t know what you did was wrong?” And Cadence nods.

“Even then. I served my dues and paid my debts. In his last days I would have even called him an acquaintance — which is saying quite a lot if you ever met him.”

“I did,” Adrian nods in agreement, “and that’s… high praise.”

“Isadora took over the Family affairs in the middle of the Mardi Gras crisis. We worked together then because we needed to — and because Izzy’s a cunning woman.” A strange look glazes Cadence’s eyes behind his lenses; something Nadya might almost call nostalgic. “She has an acute sense of smell for power; when it shifts, where it goes, and how to attain as much of it as she can. A short while after Kathy and I returned from New York she paid me a visit at my office.”

“Not for tea, I’m guessing?”

Of course not. “The overall purpose of it was a goodbye. All debts, no matter how small, were cleared. She made it clear she would have nothing more to do with me — and by extension, neither would the Family. The New Accords bind us legally and magically; through them I will always have a say in matters concerning the vampire community here. But beyond that…”

His words trail off into the night air but they don’t need to be heard for the visitors to understand them clearly. Beyond that, Cadence is risking a lot to bring them to Flechette; to Isadora.

It’s a knowledge that clearly makes Adrian uneasy. “Once we arrive, if you need to leave — it might be better that way.”

“Without me there’s nothing tying you to the city. The moment you step inside she’ll already know when you arrived. And the first thing she will want to know is why you didn’t declare yourselves until hours later. You may be spared, Adrian, for your title up North. But I don’t see Lily walking out without at least a decade of service to the Family dragging her down.”

Cadence pushes up his glasses with a resigned sigh. “This is the best way. But I know the risks. Don’t worry about me.”

His smile is strained and doesn’t last long — quickly he turns and resumes leading them on but this time in a stony and stifling silence.

Nadya feels a squeeze on her arm and finds Lily’s eyes completely devoid of their earlier delight. It’s a look she recognizes; one similar to the moments before their descent into the Council Chamber.

Just like then, she squeezes back. Their pinkies linked in a silent promise to one another; I’ll keep you safe.

They go down a block or two more before Flechette comes into view around the corner. Actually — it’s pretty hard to miss. It stands at the end of the street, borders the last of the buildings distinct to the French Quarter. This whole time Nadya’s been under the assumption that without Cadence guiding them they might not even know what to look for.

But now she’s pretty sure she could have found the place without her glasses.

There’s no ignoring the club bass pounding so loud it almost shakes the pavement. Like he reads her mind Cadence immediately explains in a lowered voice; “Fae wards seal the sound around the block. Works great for the music… and any other noises that might draw attention.” Thick black metal bars seal off the windows. Nadya and Lily exchange half-chuckles; reminded of the city.

Two men in suits stand on either side of the entrance. Nadya watches one with a clipboard in hand undo the hook of a velvet rope and allow a couple inside. She pretends the dark stains on their clothes illuminated by the neon lights are fake campy homemade blood. For her own sanity.

A large rose hums with electricity over the second floor windows. Below it; Flechette in large blocked capitals.

“What’s it mean in English?” Lily asks with a nudge to Adrian’s shoulder. Because of course he knows French. Nadya once watched him spend an entire work evening on a conference call with some biotech company in Lyon. He’s actually pretty good.

“It means dart, or arrow, something along those lines.” But the translation is nothing without the answer, so they all turn to the nerd.

He surprises them with a shrug. “Hell if I know. It’s always been the name of Carlo’s business. It was a photo house when I came to town; specializing in ones you definitely didn’t want to show your mates on the front lines. Catering after that, hired performers after the second war, and an escort service briefly when the dot-com boom hit nationwide. The club was actually Izzy’s idea after she came back up from Miami. A small group of our kind pitched in to own one together for an unlimited feeding source. It’s definitely been their most successful venture.”

“All of which had to do with sex; in one form or another.” Adrian states dryly.

“Sex sells, baby. Even sexy caterers.” Lily bumps her hip into his — he’s so taken aback that he nearly stumbles off the curb. Nadya doesn’t even try to hide her laughter.

The hairs on the back of Nadya’s neck stand up alert as they pass the queued line. Envious eyes drilling holes right through her; judging her and Lily and Adrian and Cadence, too. All of them like they’re on a shiny silver platter.

She makes the mistake of looking back when a scoff catches distant in her ear. The offender couldn’t be older than a college kid — obviously shirtless underneath his black leather jacket and for a moment she sees something glinting near his upper lip and it almost makes her stumble. But a quick look into his eyes and Nadya notices right away they’re the wrong shade of red. Too bright, too wide, too human.

He blinks and the colored contact shifts in place.

“Nadya, come on.” Adrian calls; and Lily tugs at her sleeve until the pair of them fast-walk passed the rest and through the sleek black door held open for them begrudgingly.

She looks into the doorman’s eyes, too. Those aren’t contacts.

“What happened back there?” Lily whispers at her side. Up ahead Cadence starts to lead them down a short hallway and in the dark humidity Nadya has to make a conscious effort to remind herself she’s not going to find the Baron at the end of this tunnel. “Did that kid say something to you?”

Nadya blinks back to reality. “What — no, no. He… he was wearing colored contacts.”

“So? I have every color of the rainbow back home. You’ve seen me in ‘em.”

“Yeah…” and Lily’s talking sense; they both know it — but the knowledge doesn’t shake the unease from her bones.

“What was it then?”

“He was doing it to look like one of them.” One of you. “Did you see his face, Lil’? He was so young.”

He makes Nadya think of who she was at that age. How little she knew about the world — not even counting the vampires, the Ferals; the scary truths hidden in the dark. She’s a good person — she surrounds herself with good people. But the Vegas of the world; the Lesters and the Priyas and anyone else who would even consider the awful act of Turning someone that young? They’re all too real.

When will I start to see those memories, Nadya wonders, how long until they tear me in two?

Lily’s steps falter; she hesitates. “Are you sure you can do this right now?”

It doesn’t matter whether she can or not. “It’s something I’ve gotta do anyway.” Luckily they follow Cadence and Adrian through a doorway covered by a velvet curtain shortly after; so she doesn’t have to keep talking about it.

From the outside it definitely didn’t look like Flechette could hold this many people. The building has several stories but only one floor — she has to crane her neck up high to see lights in iron-wrought fixtures all the way up top. Between the floor and ceiling various cages hang on heavy chains; scattered for space and each one with a dancing individual — a big one a little too high up for Nadya’s comfort sports three.

Servers in different states of undress — but all bearing the same thick black collar and silvery rose-engraved pendant — flit back and forth through other similarly curtained entrances with trays. Trays of drinks, one passes with three glass bowls of multicolored pills, and oh look that one has a fancy assortment of plugs… the use for which Nadya will very happily keep from her head.

Some members are dancing, others are grinding — all of them care about themselves, the person(s) they’re with, or the ones closest to them giving a show. She had expected to feel a lot of unusual things here but relief was not one of them. Not that she’s complaining.

But even though Nadya can’t tell by first glance who here is human and who is vampire; she knows for a fact the last time she was in a room with this many of them things were drastically different for her. She wasn’t a Bloodkeeper back then. Well — she was, but none of this was happening to her.

So it comes as no surprise when she locks eyes with someone—certainly a vampire—and feels something wet in her mouth that definitely isn’t there. Slick and succulent and all she has to do is bite — harder this time…

Nadya forces her eyes down and lets Lily weave her through the path Cadence carves for them. “Do you think this place is campy,” Lily calls over the music only growing louder the deeper in they go, “or do you think camp is based on places like this?!”

“I think we need to hurry up!”

“Spoilsport!”

Everything’s going just great until she’s yanked to a halt.

With one hand as a blinder Nadya shakily raises her eyes to see what’s happening.

Just up ahead Cadence and a short and balding man are locked in heated debate. The music mostly drowns them out but she catches an angry “bastard” and Cadence’s accented “demand you let us through” before it all dissolves back into noise.

“Adrian,” Lily hisses, and even that makes Nadya feel a little fuzzy, thoughts that aren’t hers starting to filter in through her best friend’s touch. Lily somehow keeping her grounded and making her feel less present at the same time, “we gotta get her somewhere — I don’t know, just somewhere not here.”

Somewhere not here sounds amazing. Yes please!

The sleek black shoes step out of Nadya’s sight — there’s a thud and the nearby laughter and conversation goes quiet. Which, of course, somehow makes Nadya’s situation feel worse.

Adrian holds the smaller man up by the front of his ruined suit; feet dangling a good foot from the ground and up in his face, words she can’t understand because she never mastered the art of lip-reading hissed between his fangs.

Cadence tries to push him back but Adrian snaps something that gets him to back off. He jerks his chin in Nadya’s direction and for a moment she holds his red-eyed gaze and doesn’t… quite recognize who she’s looking at.

And that has nothing to do with her pounding head. It has everything to do with Adrian — and Adrian alone.

Sweat beads on Nadya’s brow and stings in her eyes — she’s five solid seconds from passing out when the curtain Baldy is guarding gets pushed back and a woman dressed like she’s ready for a Victorian funeral stands as barrier. She observes each of them silently — or Nadya doesn’t see her lips move anyway — before her eyes fall on Cadence and grow hard.

Adrian drops the doorman and gestures for the two of them to come forward. It’d be a real freakin’ help if she could hear anything right now.

It helps that once they’re off the main club floor and the (surprisingly sound-muffling) curtains are closed behind them she finds immediate relief. She can hear again (and not the echoes of memories — all the better) but boy does her head hurt.

While Lily rubs the small of her back, one of the collared servers offers her a tray with a glass of water and three white pills.

“You have no reason to worry, they are for the headache; nothing more.”

The woman speaks out of sight which is ominous enough but Nadya really could care less. She’d do anything to stifle the pain, the memories; and practically launches the pills into her throat before chasing them down until the water glass is empty.

“Th—Thank you.”

“Of course,” Nadya hears the shifting sound of cloth on leather while she rubs her eyes with the heels of her palms, “I would have you collect yourself before we proceed.”

She goes to lean against Lily — where’s Lily?

“Wait, what do you mean pro—ceed…”

A larger and rougher hand than Lily’s comes down on Nadya’s shoulder. Strong enough to hold her back; keep her at bay. And when everything, including her full range of sight, finally comes back…

She really wishes it hadn’t. She’d like to take her thanks back too, while she’s at it.

Isadora de la Rosa sits as a blooming rose on an onyx canvas; dark waves of hair almost blending in except where the shine catches the light. The brightest part of her (and the room at large) is the crisp white of her pinstriped pantsuit. She watches Nadya with an unreadable deadpan and a cigarette between her long fingers. With all the black in the room the smoke can’t hide as it curls up into the air and dissipates.

Her desk, large and not unlike Adrian’s back at the office, is flanked by the Victorian funeral woman and another, much younger girl dressed similarly. She can’t be more than Nadya’s age. Maybe closer to the human boy back outside in line.

Nadya could do without the three large suited bodyguards holding three stakes to her three friends’ hearts though. If there was one thing she had to complain about, it would be that.

“You’re really leaning into the whole mafia vibe now, I see.” Cadence quips, and there’s a little quirk of his lips as the (much shorter) man behind him struggles to keep the blond held back with the stake right over his heart. It wavers and ends up more near his stomach.

He throws a look down behind him. “Looking well, Tony. Be a peach and push up my glasses for me?”

‘Tony’ hesitates — then slowly pushes them up from where they were perched dangerously on the tip of Cadence’s nose.

“Thank you.”

“Shut it.”

It’s not unlikely that the man restraining Nadya is a vampire too; but there’s no harm in trying to get herself free, right? She wiggles — the grip tightens so hard her knees almost buckle. “Ow ow owowow!”

“Get your hands off of her!” Adrian barks; and judging by the shadow that flickers over the dark, crow-like features of the vampire holding him, he’s giving her the best fight of everyone.

Lily immediately goes for some part to bite — Nadya’s got some serious respect for that. But not if it costs Lily her life—er… undeath.

And all the while Isadora de la Rosa just looks on. Not with amusement, not with malice; more bored than anything. The perpetual exhaustion with everything she must witness reminds Nadya, achingly, of Kamilah.

Cadence sighs. He’s the only one who hasn’t bothered with even the slightest escape attempt. “Adrian, stop.”

“Listen to him, Mister Raines,” Isadora finally says; but instead of looking at him she’s focused on snubbing her cigarette in an ash tray so black Nadya almost thinks it’s the desk, “you aren’t exactly giving the finest impression of your so-called revered Council of vampires. Compose yourself — and die with dignity.”

I’m sorry, do what with dignity?!

She raises two fingers as if to signal, but in a panic Nadya cries out before she can bring it down to act.

“Wait—please Miss de la Rosa, please don’t hurt him—them—anyone!”

It would have come off less whiny and beg-y if Nadya had some plan to distract Isadora, all of her vampire mafia guards, all the vampire mafia fetishists on the other side of the curtain, and get everyone out alive and intact. But she doesn’t — so the look the vampiress gives her — the one that screams ‘I had no respect for you to begin with but you’ve definitely lost some regardless’ — is justified.

Finally Isadora raises a single brow. “Well?”

“W-What?”

The younger of the women near her desk giggles under her shroud. The other shoots her a look — maybe? She definitely looks that way and it definitely shuts her up.

“I assumed you had more to your impassioned plea,” de la Rosa leans back in her chair, “but if that is not the case…”

Nadya opens her mouth but all that comes out is a long, deep, and extremely masculine groan. Oh thank god that wasn’t her.

“Why are you pulling this, Izzy?” Which is apparently not a nickname that’s public knowledge because oh dear god they are so going to die right now. “This is a stunt your father would pull.”

Isadora’s features flicker in obvious annoyance. “Did anyone ask you, Cadence?” She snaps. “Tony, cut out his tongue.”

“Tony don’t you dare.”

Tony probably would — if he could reach that high. “Didn’t I tell you to shut it?”

“Anthony.”

“Y-Yes ma’am!”

Calling it chaos would be a kind understatement. And Nadya can’t even tell if Cadence is doing anything on purpose; all of these little irritants that make one woman laugh and distract another and fluster Tony and make Isadora look ready to—

Nadya blinks and Adrian’s a blur — then he’s a blur with a stake that he hurls to the floor before taking his captor’s head in both hands. He doesn’t look like Adrian again and the sight of it has her more terrified than anything that’s happened so far.

“Let. them. go.” He grits in even measure. “Or I rip her head off.”

To her credit Isadora takes the threat coolly and in stride. “Will you now?”

“We came here willingly, Isadora. None of this hostility is necessary.”

“We shall have to agree to disagree on that.”

“Let them go and we can talk — like civilized people.”

Slowly she stands, does up the button at the bottom of her blazer and smooths down her skirt. More Wall Street than kinkfest. “What about this has given you the impression I want to talk about anything? You have power, Raines, I’ll give you that. So I forgave you for slighting me once. But you know what they say… Happens once, shame on me. Happens twice… ensure it doesn’t happen a third time.”

Lily squirms. “That’s… not a thing people say, like at all.”

“Lil’.”

“Well it’s not!”

But thankfully Isadora is too fixated on Adrian to have noticed.

“Examples have to be made,” she continues, “and what message would I be sending my Family if I were to let you wander my city unpunished?”

Adrian growls. “There were extenuating circumstances.”

“There are always extenuating circumstances with you.” But Isadora doesn’t meet Adrian’s eyes as she says it — Nadya catches her looking away from Cadence with a sigh. “I have a responsibility to keep me and mine safe.”

“We aren’t the threat.”

She answers with silence and pursed lips. The tension in the room shifts uncomfortably — and just like that Adrian seems to realize he’s the one holding a woman hostage. Conflict paints thick across his face as he takes in their options, the faces of the foreign vampires watching his every move.

Resigned, he lets the de la Rosa vampire go. Steps back with hands held up.

Nadya lets out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. It sends her into a coughing fit and draws his attention — distracts Adrian just enough for the older of the veiled women to come up at his side with a new stake sharp at his ribs.

But it’s with an unparalleled relief that she sees her Adrian again in his concern.

“Nadya, are you okay?”

She nods and swallows air like it’s in short supply. “Fine and dandy. Are you?”

He doesn’t answer.

Only now they’re back in the same predicament and this time without any element of surprise. And she does not want to die in a fetish club in New Orleans…

At least not without telling Kamilah how sorry she is.

The dark rug muffles the tap-tap of the Southern vampire’s heels as she approaches Adrian; closes the space between them. “If you’re going to threaten anyone, Raines, next time it had better be me.”

“Noted.”

She clenches a fist at her side but has the willpower not to raise it. “Why are you back in my territory anyway?”

Behind her, Cadence swallows audibly. Before Adrian can even open his mouth she’s turned her back on him. Knows now he’s not the one she should be questioning.

The pained frustration of decision furrows Isadora’s dark brow. “You idiot… can’t you see, Cadence, that this is exactly what I meant when I said I wanted you far away from us? You invite trouble — worse than that, you are oblivious to the fact.”

His broad shoulders slump. “You’re the one who brought out the stakes.”

“I gave you what you wanted. Why do you insist on complicating my life? Why could you not take your lead and leave the Quarter?”

He recoils, affronted. The thought hadn’t even occurred to him. “What? I — this is my home just as much as it is yours.”

“I think we both know that not to be the case.”

“Izz—”

“No, not you,” she presses a finger to his lips; Cadence falls silent, “someone else… you.”

Nadya’s nerve drops out of her stomach when Isadora decides to round on her. Nadya does not handle herself well in front of powerful women in business attire, and if her current track record is anything to go by she’s not exactly going to be their saving grace here.

“Me?”

“You, yes. What was your name again?”

She feels like she’s eaten fancy cheese; but she endures. “Nadya, I’m Nadya.”

“And why do you keep such unusual company, Nadya?”

Well that’s not what she was expecting. “How do you know it’s not the other way around?”

“Because you don’t look like a pet human. At least not like the ones out there.” Isadora waves a hand towards the main club. “And because you seem to have an acute understanding of what is happening here. You have not dissolved into panic, and you wear the claim of a vampire not present with us on your wrist.”

The heavy hand leaves her shoulder and Isadora approaches sultry; catlike. She reaches forward and takes Nadya’s hand in her own — strokes her thumb over a knuckle and for a moment she almost thinks the vampiress is going to kiss the back of it.

Instead she turns Nadya’s wrist up and examines the way the dim lighting catches her bracelet. Isadora speaks low, now; so low Nadya strains to hear her.

“Is Kamilah Sayeed here, as well? How is she doing these days?”

“You know Kamilah?” Of course she knows Kamilah. Why are you even surprised?

Isadora doesn’t break her hold. Nadya knows exactly what will happen if she tries to take it upon herself to separate them though. “That was not an answer.”

“No — No she’s not here. She stayed in New York.”

Isadora seems amused, which in Nadya’s opinion is a welcome change from murderous. But they definitely can — and probably do — exist in the same house.

“Why are you and your friends in my city?”

Nadya tries to look over her shoulder to Adrian. Hoping; praying he could somehow give her something to say. Because all she can think is the truth and telling everyone the truth isn’t exactly part of the plan.

Adrian sees her panic. “She’s got nothing to do with this, Isadora. Leave her alone.”

“See the more you say that, Raines, the more I think you’re not telling me the truth. So, Nadya, I’ll ask again.”

“Isadora —”

He’d probably do better yelling at a brick wall. She finds it all too easy to ignore him; let him fade into the background as she leans down and close to Nadya’s face. Tilts her chin up with a dark and manicured fingertip.

“Why are you and your friends in my city?”

Vampires can’t hypnotize people, right? Like, Adrian and Kamilah would have made it a point to tell her if vampires could hypnotize people, right? If Jax and Maricruz had shared some innate vamp-y hypnosis secret with Lily, then Lily would have told her, right?

Nadya can’t say she’s ever been hypnotized before so she isn’t certain but wow does it feel like Isadora’s trying to hypnotize her. Making her look deep into her eyes, red and practically glowing with pupils narrowed into slits and the way her voice curls around her words is… is really pretty and…

Holy mother of crap can vampires hypnotize people?!

While Adrian struggles to peer over Isadora’s shoulder to see exactly why Nadya’s gone so quiet, Cadence doesn’t have to. He’s had enough of whatever the heck this is, apparently, and pushes Tony off of him and into the nearest wall with startling ease.

“No — this is too far, Isadora, she’s human for god’s sake!” He gets to them before anyone else can stop him. “Get out of her mind before you do any damage.”

Not that she listens. Maybe she can’t listen. Nadya’s definitely having a harder time hearing the room around them so suffice to say it’s the same for Isadora, right?

Get out of her mind.

Oh god. Get out of my mind. You can’t see what’s in there.

She feels frozen, trapped and bound in a vice of her own skin. But it isn’t something she’s never felt before. She has, and rather recently too. The only difference is Jameson connected them at her temples. Isadora de la Rosa does just as well using only her eyes.

Get out, please. You can’t see.

Why can I not, Nadya? Show me.

I just can’t. You — You won’t like it. She doesn’t like it. She doesn’t like it one bit.

How about I make that decision for myself?

“What are you standing around for?” shouts Lily. “Get her away! Nadya, can you hear me? Nadya!”

But Cadence hesitates; hands hovering just over them. “If I break the connection while Izzy’s pressing in… it might not go well.”

Lily looks to Adrian in a panic. “Dude!”

“Cadence, it’s okay. Do it.”

He frowns at Adrian; his glasses slip down his nose. “She’s a powerful psychic, Adrian. I don’t want Nadya to get hurt.”

“She won’t be. Break them up.”

Can someone break us up, please?!

Why are you resisting me? What are you hiding?

“But —”

“Nadya’s not the one who’ll be hurt! Just—listen to me and do it!”

Convicted and terrified, Cadence places his hands on the backs of their necks and pulls.

When Nadya opens her eyes she knows, objectively, that there’s been a passage of time. But the usual sluggishness, the feeling like she’s emerging from a pit of black sludge isn’t there. Somehow, she was both conscious… and not.

The carpet is itchy under her palms and Nadya might have shattered her tail bone into a thousand pieces. It sure feels that way. Adrian holds her halfway upright with a hand firm in the middle of her back. She’s grateful that he’s both worried and cautious enough to keep from touching her directly; and instead his hand hovers just shy of her face.

“Nadya, can you hear me?”

But that’s Lily’s voice — oh, Lily’s there too. She speaks again but slower; “How many fingers am I holding up?”

She squints. Everything is still blurry.

“I don’t… I can’t…” then it hits her, “you’re holding up my glasses, aren’t you?”

They fall into her waiting hand. When everything comes into clear (if smudged with a stampede of fingerprints) view Nadya looks up to see Lily beaming.

“She’s in the clear.”

“No,” comes Isadora’s growl from somewhere not in her immediate reach—thank god, “none of you are.”

It’s a little relieving that Nadya wasn’t the only one thrown on her butt. But Isadora’s recovery is faster and that’s a big yikes. She pushes the worried faces and reaches of her subordinates aside and stands on her own. She tries to smooth herself back to her previous perfection but the damage is done — there’s no changing the tension coiling tightly inside her, or the wild uncertainty in her eyes.

Something happened — Nadya’s foggy on exactly what but she knows that much. Just like she knows the look Isadora’s giving her.

She knows.

A ragged groan breaks the silence and all eyes turn to Cadence who was somehow also thrown off his feet; only he doesn’t have anyone to check up on him. Nadya gives a pleading look to Lily and immediately she’s at his side. He’s groggy, but despite the shaking in his arms he can hold himself up. He’ll live — long enough for her to thank him anyway.

Isadora has never been the type to be at a loss for words. Nadya can see it now; decades of being loud, being harsh; whatever it took to be respected in the world. Whatever it took to carry on the de la Rosa name and legacy.

The city hadn’t even given her the chance to mourn him.

“You shouldn’t be possible,” she whispers, and Nadya laughs — says the vampire.

Adrian looks between them with growing confusion. “What happened?”

She pats at his arm and he gets the hint; helps Nadya and her knocking knees to stand. She’s tired of being looked down on by them, believe it or not, so if she can look Isadora in the eyes then she’s going to.

“You wanted to know why we were here, in New Orleans,” Nadya speaks slowly to keep her voice from betraying just how shaken up she really feels, “well now you do.”

When Nadya closes her eyes she can see it; the Amulet of Nero. In flashes of printed-out pictures on Adrian’s office wall and resting cupped in Cadence’s palms and held dangling by the chain up to the light of this very office; reverent — and solemn, too. A gift from someone given up a long time ago.

All that through Isadora’s eyes.

Nadya sighs and rubs her aching temple. “She doesn’t have the Amulet.”

Neither Adrian nor Lily hide their shock. “How do you know?” he asks. But how can she reasonably say she just does?

When Isadora steps forward one of the veiled women reaches out to try and stop her. Nadya can feel the energy—uneasy-uncertain-doubtful-fearful-of-the-unknown—coming from the Southern vampires like waves of endless nausea. But her hand is batted away. Isadora is the only one certain of anything right now.

“You’re right,” she answers in measured caution, “the Amulet is no longer in my possession. But I can tell you where it is… and, should you be willing, try and help you get it back.”

Murmurs of confusion ripple out from the other vampires. Isadora shrugs them off — her intense focus on Nadya strong; stalwart.

You’ve seen what’s at stake. What could—will—happen if we don’t.

Yes, I have.

Nadya nods.

“We could use all the help we can get.”

[clansayeed]

Bound by Destiny ― Chapter 16: The Throne

PAIRING: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Nadya Al Jamil) RATING: Mature

⥼ MASTERLIST ⥽

⥼ Bound by Destiny ⥽

Nadya Al Jamil (MC) has been struggling from the day she moved to Manhattan, but her new job as assistant to the mysterious CEO of Raines Corp was supposed to turn her luck around. Until she finds herself caught in the middle of a war involving the Council of Vampires who secretly run the city. An evil from the birth of Vampire-kind stirs beneath, feeding on the conflict, and finds Nadya bound to a destiny she never asked for.

Bound by Destiny and the rest of the Oblivion Bound series is an ongoing dramatic retelling project of the Bloodbound series and spin-off, Nightbound. Find out more [HERE].

*Let me know if you would like to be added to the Destiny tag list!

⥼ Chapter Summary ⥽

Kamilah and Nadya don’t deal with the day after. Together the girls journey to the Council Chamber for Adrian’s trial. Nadya is shaken when she comes upon a throne she shouldn’t know.

[READ IT ON AO3]

"You would do well to hold your tongue.”

“Forgive me, my King. You know I don’t mean to speak out of turn —”

“And yet you persist in doing so. I would have thought your disposable nature would be cemented in your mind after your ascension to the role at my side.”

“Yes, I—I understand. But what you’re suggesting is…”

“What our King suggests is not our place to question, Adrian.”

“Of course, Kamilah. I understand. My apologies, my King.”

“As always you are forgiven. How could I not forgive you in your youthful ignorance? One day you will have lived as long as I do now. You will have seen empires of mortals rise and fall and know that we are that which remains.

One day you will understand. For now… begone. Both of you.”

“Yes, my King.”

“Yes, my love.”

Nadya doesn’t know which is more terrifying to think about; that she’s getting used to these nightmares or that she’s come to expect them.

But sitting on a gilded throne in a cavern… being both herself and someone else — and an awful someone else at that — at least it’s getting easier and easier to wake from the dreams. She just wants them to go away.

She’s alone in her bed. She’s in her bed at Kamilah’s penthouse. Her hair is still damp but the sheets underneath her body have long-since dried. When she moves something tugs at her arm — she looks to see the remains of a shirt sleeve still clinging to life on her shoulder.

That, too, Nadya might accidentally convince herself was a dream if not for all the worldly evidence that said otherwise. Screamed it, even.

Her legs feel like jelly but Nadya forces herself up and into a shower. Relishes the fact that it’s not the awkward carved-out space in Lily’s place — however homey it was and however generous she was to share it — but an actual, tile-and-tub shower with more than five minutes of hot water to help her wash sweat, rain, and her nightmares off her body.

Maybe Kamilah didn’t stay until the morning (afternoon? she can’t tell anymore) because she wants to forget it happened.

Regardless of Kamilah’s thoughts on the matter, though, judging by the wide every-tooth-accounted-for grin Lily gives her best friend when the smell of fresh coffee coaxes her into the kitchen she wants to know everything.

“It’s too early for this,” Nadya protests; rubs her temples with her eyes closed and when she opens them there’s magically a mug of coffee within reach. Maybe the Gerard-fairy could get her that pony she wanted when she was ten…

“It’s never too early to get into the juicy details,” Lily props her chin on both hands, “you’re glowing, babe.”

“Am not.”

“Are so.”

“I am not!”

Lily throws her hands up with exasperation. “Ignorance must be so fucking blissful! I’d give my left nut to be able to bone my girlfriend right now!”

There’s a clatter by the sink and they both look to see Gerard fumble with a piece of cutlery and his favorite scrubbing sponge. He tries to play it off cool but Nadya knows better. “Let’s try and calm it down with the skanky talk, Lil’.”

“Not skanky if it’s how I feel.”

Gerard chuckles. “Oh don’t mind me, ladies. At my age a shock to the system keeps me on my toes.”

He wipes off his hands and gets about preparing for Kamilah’s arrival the usual way; a folded newspaper and espresso cup with saucer set immediately to Nadya’s left. And before she can ask — Kamilah herself walks in with the same purpose and intent she does everything else.

Including desperate rain-soaked sex.

Did she expect to be swept up in Kamilah’s strong arms and bent over the table in a passionate kiss; no. Did she hope for a little acknowledgment at the very least; well, certainly more than the big bucketful of nothing her way as Kamilah takes her usual seat, sips her usual coffee, and opens her usual evening edition.

Lily makes a face at her that is hidden by the Stocks. Nadya silently tries to admonish her but, well, Lily does what Lily wants whether she’s a vampire or a human.

Silence. Silence. Nadya tries to break it as best she can.

“So Kamilah, this is —”

“I’m well aware of who she is.” Kamilah flicks the paper in half and appraises Lily with cold nonchalance. “And what she is, is a liability.”

Lily huffs. “Just because I’m not in your Clans doesn’t mean —”

All Kamilah has to do is hold up a finger. There’s a part of Nadya that’s trying to find even the smallest thing to keep her optimistic and apparently that part is a horny little monster; since it makes her look at the finger and go pink in the cheeks.

Kamilah either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care. Her only concern is Lily.

“You are a prime example of the prosecution’s case against Adrian; by virtue of his blood you were Turned. Rather than go through the proper channels to instill you a premature spot in his Clan he was content to let you disappear and sweep the matter under the rug.”

“That’s not — that’s not what happened, not entirely! It isn’t the whole story.” Nadya raises her voice to try and get Kamilah to look at her.

It works; a brief flicker of dark hues that has her heart racing and no doubt the vampires in the room both catch it. But it’s not something she can control. It might not even be for Kamilah — she’s definitely angry enough.

“Kamilah, you know that’s not what happened.”

“Yes, I do,” she sips her coffee, “yet what should we say otherwise? Either we let that be the case made against him on this act alone or we reveal to the Council any knowledge we might have regarding the Clanless, their operations, and where they might be hiding. Which is worse?”

It’s a question she doesn’t know the answer to. Judging by the look Kamilah gives her — she doesn’t have any answers either.

“I can’t risk them, Nadi’.” mutters Lily.

She looks across the table; reaches out and takes Lily’s hand in hers. “I know — we’re not doing that. I’m not gonna sell out the Clanless.”

“Even if it leads to Adrian’s execution?” Kamilah says it only because it’s something they need to take into account; she knows that. But it’s the way she’s talking that keeps adding fuel to the fire inside her belly.

“And I won’t let that happen, either.”

“My point remains the same; having this girl there would only jeopardize Adrian’s already thin defense.”

Already thin defense. God, it makes her head spin around backwards.

“What is he being charged with anyway? Last I saw you guys everyone was on the same side.”

As Gerard comes around to pour more coffee she catches his expression; his normal ease replaced with stiffness and more lines than usual etched into his furrowed brow. It makes Nadya’s stomach upset.

She tries to backtrack. “Never mind, we can talk about it later, or…”

“No, you have a right to ask. And I would rather you know what you will be walking into” Kamilah sets her paper aside to give them her full attention. “You don’t know the whole story — everything that’s led up to this point. From small deals and micro-aggressions to spats both behind closed doors and within Council Chambers. I’m afraid this has been a long time coming, Nadya. And the events of the Ball were all that was needed for… shall we say certain parties to enact plans that have merely been lying in wait.

“It’s no secret that Adrian hasn’t always seen eye-to-eye with the rest of the Council. You’ve met them. I think you can draw your own conclusions. The more Adrian has pushed for progress and integration into human society the more resistance he’s been met with — even from those we thought saw our way of things at the very least for their own gains.”

Nadya brings one leg up to her chest. “Why do I feel like you’re trying not to say Lester’s name?”

“Castellanos and Adrian have always had a tense partnership — only as strong as what they both got out of it. But that isn’t uncommon for our kind; especially for those who have lived as long as we.”

“So Lester stabbed him in the back.”

“Yes, and no,” Kamilah’s jaw sets; her teeth grinding together like slabs of stone, “They all did; the entire Council — save myself.”

“And we’re sure about that?”

Both Nadya and Kamilah look at Lily like she’s grown another head. Nadya quickly dissolves into panic; reaches out and grabs Kamilah’s upper arm even though she knows it’s about as effective as a blade of grass trying to stop a hurricane.

There’s no mistaking Kamilah’s tone — she is and always will be the calm before and the storm itself.

“I suggest you refrain from speaking again should you value the lower part of your skull, newborn.”

And Nadya wants to actually smack Lily upside the head for having the gall to snap back; “Well you keep saying the Council are the bad guys. Except you’re on it, too. You’re the one we should be rooting for? The Kingsley Shacklebolt of the Ministry working on the inside?”

“You dare…”

“Lily, stop!”

Nadya’s voice hurts her own ears; even the thought of raising it at Lily especially after their confrontation in the Shadow Den… she’s been walking on eggshells made of tissue paper around her best friend. And, really, she’s doing it to keep Lily safe in the end.

The muscles under Nadya’s grasp shift, though. She has a chance to keep this from getting very bloody very fast.

“Please, Lil’,” she continues, “I get why you’re thinking like that — I would too if I didn’t know better — but Kamilah and Adrian are more than just ‘on the Council’ together. They’ve been through everything and stayed at each other’s sides. Kamilah was there when Adrian was Turned — and—and they stayed together even when it meant betraying their Maker. She wouldn’t turn on him — ever. Just like you wouldn’t tun on me.”

It’s enough to satisfy Lily — or her version of satisfied in which she goes to dig in the cupboards for something to munch on and help her think.

But her victory is short-lived when she looks at Kamilah with relief and is met with a clouded anger. Disbelief.

“W-What’s wrong?”

The vampire regards her carefully. How one would behave next to a wild tiger. Only out of the pair of them it’s not Nadya who is the dangerous one.

“I was not aware Adrian had told you so much of our shared history. Particularly that which involved…” she swallows the words on her tongue like bile, “our Maker.”

He didn’t, she’s ready to say — an automatic response. But it made sense given Adrian’s reaction to the man’s portrait at the castle. Gaius Turned Kamilah and Adrian…?

But how did she know that?

She doesn’t know how; she simply does.

Yet something tells her Kamilah would, after being equally unsatisfied with such an answer, not be as content as Nadya to let it go. Not at all.

So she shrugs, mutters “Late nights at the office… he said not to tell you I knew,” and hopes even if her lie isn’t convincing enough that there’s more on Kamilah’s plate than pushing the issue.

Kamilah turns away curtly.

With luck like this she’s really gotta go buy a lottery ticket soon.

“During the Council and tribunal held against him I must remain impartial. As the eldest member I have the immediate authority regarding his case but, as with all things, it will come down to a vote no matter my ruling.”

“So no chance you could go all Judge Judy on them, then, huh?” Lily asks around a mouthful of saltines. Kamilah’s look is answer enough.

“Kamilah,” Nadya touches her again, wary this time. Glad she doesn’t pull away or look ready to strike. “If you’re gonna be in charge of everything I’m going in there alone. And as much as I trust you… and Adrian, for that matter, I just…”

“No, you’re right to be cautious.” The woman’s lips quirk in the barest of smiles — but Nadya is too focused on the sudden warmth in her gaze. It feels like a spotlight under the moon. It feels like last night. “And Adrian will be in no position to help you, I’m afraid.”

“Then let Lily come. She risked enough coming up here anyway — it’s not fair to leave her hanging.”

“I dunno mami,” Lily’s imitation Mari accent is somehow made better by a mouthful of snack, “I’m kinda digging this place —” she rolls her eyes at Kamilah’s glower, “—I’m kidding, jeez. Like I’d leave my girl hanging in a den full of Dracula wannabes.”

“I’ll forgive that insult only because of how little you know.”

“Insul—wait. No freak-fuckin’ way. Is he real? Is Dracula real?!”

While Lily copes with the realization of Dracula in her own unique way Nadya takes the moment of distraction to slide her hand down Kamilah’s sleeve — to ghost her fingertips over the back of her hand.

Kamilah looks back as if to question it but the look in Nadya’s eyes is enough.

She lowers her voice to a whisper. “How long did you, uh… I mean how…”

“How long did I stay with you last night?” Kamilah finishes for her and despite her flush Nadya manages a nod. “Long enough for you to go into a deep slumber. Then I returned to my room.”

“You could’ve stayed. It’s technically your room, too.”

Kamilah purses her lips. “No doubt you wish to discuss it; what happened.”

“Well, yeah,” she shrugs, “kinda.”

But the energy radiating off of her says it’s not a desire they share. It’s in the loose hold of the vampire’s fingers and the way she looks at Nadya without seeing her. It hurts.

Makes Nadya pull her hand away, stuff it in her lap. “But I get it. Not a big deal.”

“I’d ask you to at least give me the courtesy of honesty.” Nadya exhales a shiver as she feels cool fingertips brush her hair back; tuck it behind her ear and keep her from hiding her face to Kamilah’s eyes. “As I… might like to give you the courtesy of a discussion — when all is right and Adrian is safe. Something we both should see as a priority, yes?”

Oh. She nods. “Y-Yeah.”

Then Kamilah’s standing and bringing Nadya up with her by the elbow. Enough to draw Lily’s attention away from the different types of tea Gerard’s hoarded over the years.

He went over them all with her once. She tries to pretend it doesn’t exist since there’s no rhyme or reason to his organizing.

“Too much time has been wasted already. The tribunal will begin at midnight — with or without our presence. I rather think we’d prefer to be there.”

This time when Nadya shivers it’s like someone’s just walked over her grave. Makes her wrap her arms around her middle.

“Do you really think my testimony will change anything? The Baron hates me, Vega’s threatened me, Lester… is Lester. And Priya doesn’t seem to like anything at all.”

Kamilah’s hand shifts, touches becoming a caress on her arm. “Better to try than to do nothing.”

“Right.”

Someone walks over her grave again. Nadya hopes it’s somewhere pretty.

“Does it help if I do this?”

“Lil’ I love and appreciate you but you’re as cold as the outside air right now. I think that’s actually making it worse.”

Lily backs off of her hug but takes Nadya’s hand instead. She really doesn’t deserve a friend like her but here she is, risking her afterlife — and so far the only way she’s thought up to repay her is buying the next five games Lily loves on pre-order the moment they’re available.

Ahead of them Kamilah calls back, “We’re almost there,” and hastens her pace.

Frankly three women walking around the dark and hidden paths of Central Park at night should be the beginning of the end but the only thing that makes her laugh right now is how much she pities the moron who messes with Lily and Kamilah thinking they’ll win.

They finally come to a halt in front of a statue; Nadya peers at the inscription at the base like it’s supposed to clear everything up but it does the exact opposite.

“Uh… Why are we paying Chris Columbus a visit?” Lily asks for her.

Kamilah trails her leather-gloved fingers around a dip in the base with a scornful huff. “I’ve been petitioning to have this atrocity removed since it was commissioned. Nearly had it five years ago — the young people of the world did good work in spreading the truth behind the pretty lies of historians and other members of the victorious parties. But this country has a hard-on for it’s white founders no matter how many corpses their legacy was built upon.”

“Amen, sister. Preach!” Lily pounds her fist into the air unabashedly.

“Still,” Kamilah continues, “if they refuse to tear him down then I shall use him to my advantage.”

There’s a click and the statue begins to slide aside of its own accord. Nadya and Lily look around wildly to make sure no one else sees but Kamilah remains unperturbed.

When the statue has gone as far askew as it can go there exists in its place a descending stone staircase — narrow near the surface but judging by the torches flicking soft orange light further down it empties out somewhere large.

“This is the single best Tomb Raider shit I’ve seen in my whole life!” Lily squeals in delight — doesn’t wait for Kamilah’s invitation to hop and skip her way down the steps. Her voice echoes on the stone; “This is so cool!”

Well, at least someone is having a good time.

“Uh… secret tunnel, huh.” Meanwhile Nadya processes it in her own wild way. Tries not to jump when she feels Kamilah’s hand on her lower back nudge her forward.

“Did you think we met in some city hall chamber?”

Since she has a feeling this might be the last time she sees anything resembling mirth from Kamilah for some time Nadya, spurred by adrenaline and fear and other bad things warring with the optimism she’s practically forcing on herself, stands forward on her toes and kisses her.

At first she’d likely get the same effect from kissing Chris Columbus behind her. Then Kamilah yields — out of pity or passion she can’t tell, doesn’t want to know — and rests her hands on Nadya’s hips to kiss her back and guide her away.

Kamilah doesn’t say anything — doesn’t need to. The question is there in her eyes.

“Because,” Nadya answers in her softest voice, “I was running out of good things to keep me believing we can win this.”

Before her Kamilah pulls off her glove; cards her fingers through Nadya’s hair just like back at the penthouse. Only this time she allows herself to savor the touch with closed eyes intent on snapping a still of this moment for all the awful things to come.

“Should you find a way to share your optimism… I would not turn it away.”

Kamilah’s breath is warm but her lips are cool against Nadya’s forehead. She curls her fingers in the fur lining of her coat lapels and uses up all that good luck she’s had in the little things to wish with all her might that everything was okay; that Adrian was safe and sound and they were in the park because it was a nice date spot — rather than where they might descend into their literal deaths.

Apparently she’s not saved up that much good luck just yet. Since everything is the same when she opens her eyes to watch Kamilah stroke her cheek with the back of her hand.

“Come. ‘Once more unto the breach,’ as they say.”

Kamilah doesn’t stop her from taking hold of her arm so she clings without care. Ducks when Kamilah tells her to watch her head and turns to see the base of Columbus slide back into place and plunge them into stifled darkness.

They catch up with Lily at the bottom of the steps. At first Nadya’s ready to make a joke about picking her jaw up off the dirt floor but that’s dashed from her mind the moment she catches a look herself.

Crumbled ruins in columns, archways, effigies with worn faces and broken limbs. Like a civilization once flourished underneath the streets filled with careless conversation and pigeons by the dozens.

Large fire pits — some made of twisted metal and others mere stone bowls — dot across the ground where footsteps have tamped down the earth with time. Nothing grows here from below but trickles down from the sun and sky above in long tendrils of ivy. If the moss is waging a war on those who once called this place home — the moss has definitely won.

“Final boss encounter…” Lily whispers in awe. Smacks Nadya’s arm gently and points forward. “And there’s even a bitchin’ throne!”

It was like she was doing everything she could not to see it. But once Lily draws it to her attention she can’t look at anything else.

The throne sits at the farthest end of the hall; small from this distance but imposing up close, on a dais of a stone slab with runes and glyphs carved along the ridges. It’s the only thing in the cavernous chamber that doesn’t appear to have suffered the wrath of time.

On either side sit the largest of the fire pits; flickering heat that Nadya can feel even from far back. Her eyes sweep over every golden, gleaming inch of the chair and foreboding settles deep inside her — branches out not unlike the ivy hanging from on high — from her gut to her limbs and so powerful she’s choking on it.

When she doesn’t get the reaction she wants Lily turns to face her. Grows rigid with concern when Nadya’s tears catch the firelight as they fall and drip down her chin.

“Nadi’? Nadya? Shit Nadya what’s wrong?”

Only when Lily grabs her by the shoulders and turns her bodily does the spell break. Eyes tear away from the throne and her knees buckle — without Lily there to catch her she’d fall.

Kamilah, already striding towards the end of the hall, turns back sharply.

“What’s the matter?” She’s back at their side in a beat. Looking Nadya over with concern bordering on anger. “What’s happened?”

“Nadya — hon — talk to us.” Lily cradles her head on her shoulder and Nadya wants to thank her for the gesture but she just can’t find the words.

Then Kamilah comes into blurry, teary view. Cups a hand along her jaw.

“Please. What is it?”

“The… th-throne,” she manages to gasp; both vampires spare it a glance like it doesn’t want to crush their very souls and she’s jealous of their ignorance. “I—I—it…”

She takes in a sharp breath and the words tumble from her unbidden.

“It’s mine. That throne is mine.”