#and wow i have never ever at all once thought about how me killing myself would affect other people or whether it would at all what an idea

[cetoddle]

okay what i have to say is lowkey embarrassing but i wanna bitch and it’s probably only embarrassing to me bc im shy about this stuff anyways the moral of the story is i wanna bitch and u should probably just ignore me. god bless

[titaswrld]

deadpool!

….as your boyfriend.

description: deadpool as your boyfriend!

pairing: deadpool x you!

contains: 18+, mentions of sex!

|an: just saw deadpool & wolverine.. couldn’t help myself.

- awful with emotions but always finds a way to make up for things whether through humor or sex.

- speaking of humor you’re never not laughing with him, or bickering, or fucking

- you’re the only person he can actually feel vulnerable and comfortable with, he cherishes that and he loves you so much for that.

- you’re his person, he would genuinely kill for you if it meant he would lose someone so important in his life.

- if someone makes you sad, mad or uncomfortable ooo…not his babygirl.

- he usually doesn’t keep people or friends in his loop often, they could find him annoying or over the top but not you.

- you love absolutely everything about him, his outlandish humor, his extroverted personality, his big ol’ mouth. you think it’s so hot.

- so hot when he’s mean to you so hot when he’s soft with you

- you literally bicker like two teenage girls all the time and he always somehow clocks your tea it’s ridiculous but you also find it impressive that he always has something to say that you cannot come back from😭

- god you need to pray that no man ever even has the thought of coming on to you… he’ll experience some banter with your boyfriend before it’s lights out.

- not only are you his but he’s yours! he’s super loyal and if he can’t get someone to back off , you sure will!

- you’re always having fun with him date nights are some of the best times of your life, he always finds a way to entertain you no matter what you’re doing.

- always gotta hand somewhere, your ass, a singular cheek, a titty, somewhere. how could you expect him not to! you’re all his.

- you literally have him wrapped around your finger, he’d do absolutely anything for you.

- also always bullying you he is so straightforward😭

“hon that has got to be the ugliest shirt i’ve ever seen on you”

“wade-“

“i know you got better in that closet that i snoop through and try on all your clothes when you aren’t home now go!”

- he’s so tall so if you’re short oh wow…you’re never catching a break

“soooo how’s the weather down there.” wade said, placing his elbow on the crown of your head.

“prick…”

…

“yeah that’s enough of that dirty mouth!” your boyfriend had announced before bending down and wrapping an arm around your behind, throwing you over his shoulder and positioning his palm on your ass.

“god, wade put me down!” you’d laughed playfully hitting his back.

“don’t make me have to spank you!” he said, lighting pinching your ass.

- do not get an animal bc it will quickly become his center of attention and he will defend it over you.

“wade, we’re having my mom over please put it in the room”

“ugh…she’s so mean isn’t she sugar?” he’d said stroking your pet, followed by a “yes she is yes she is!” as the animal licked his face.

sigh.

- good lord we got a cuddle monster on our hands!

- absolutely adores any type of affection and practically begs you for it 24/7. he loves being little spoon specifically. also loves it when u scratch or message his back, bc that also gets him going..

- speaking of, you got this guy rock solid 24/7

“hungry for seconds?” he joked, hugging you from behind and pressing his hardened cock against your ass.

“we literally jus-“ you’d started just to be interrupted mid sentence.

“so! cmon baby throw a dog a bone.” he muttered, hand already gripping your inner thigh.

you’d sighed, god you can’t resist him.

- it doesn’t matter what you’re doing he finds anything you do hot i stg

- a M-U-N-C-H! for life, literally came in his pants from eating you out once! he loves making you feel good.

- a goofball during sex he cannot do shit seriously😭 he be talking you and your pussy thru it!

- again, if you’re petite god help you bc he is large.

- babe, you better match his freak because yall doing anything.

- trying a new thing every night multiple times bc that sex is never vanilla and that dick is never tired! at some point he’s just making positions up😭

[fanficsformyfaves]

Reunion

Shaggy Rogers x Daphne Blake's Sister!Reader

WARNING: Nothing but Fluff <3, Mutual Pining, Reader is a Black Belt in Karate

PREFACE: When the gang first split up, of course Shaggy was devasted, but he was more upset that he would never get to see Reader again. That was until they all reunite in the airport for a mystery they were invited to solve two years later

A/N: Flashbacks in Italics!

There aren't any stories about my husband and I am deeply appalled!

SHAGGY'S P.O.V.

"Come on, Scoob. Like, we're gonna be late for the flight", I say,

Packing up our Scooby snacks for the trip, while he dealt with our clothes.

"Oooh, Rooby Snacks"

He says, trynna grab a piece, to which I bat his hand away.

"These are for the trip, man!", I scold,

As he huffed, zipping up our bags. We hail a cab, toss our luggage in the trunk and hop in.

It's been a while since we had a totally rad mystery to solve. Like, as terrifying as those creeps were, I miss getting to work on cracking the case...and getting to hang with (Y/N).

She was like, the most perfect girl in the world. Like, imagine all the best things in one person. Even all the hotdogs, sundae ice creams and rollercoasters couldn't come close to how beautiful she was. She never failed to make my heart do summersaults inside my chest.

But I never had the guts to tell her that. I mean, she was super cute and I was the goofball of Mystery Inc.

So, I knew I had no chance.

"Raggy!", Scoob snaps me out of my thoughts,

Nudging me with his elbow and letting me know that we made it to the airport. While grabbing our bags, I look over at the large tree by the entrance and my heart drops like a sack of potatoes.

There she was in all her glory. With her pretty hair and eyes that shined like gumdrops. She was just as pretty as I remembered. I could already feel the goofy grin settling on my face.

YOUR P.O.V.

"Want anything from the gift shop, while I'm in there?", Daphne questioned,

"I'm good- oh! Maybe food from the McDonald's next door?", I request,

Looking up from the book I bought prior to getting here. I watch as my sister gives me an unimpressed look, placing a hand on her hip.

"What? I missed breakfast!", I retort at her reaction,

"And who's fault is that?"

"Um, yours? If you hadn't hogged the bathroom all morning to do your hair, I would've had enough time to make some food"

"Well, excuse me for caring about my appearance. You think all this takes five minutes?", she says,

Gesturing to herself. Once she realized there was no getting through to me, she accepts defeat by sighing to herself and rolling her eyes.

"Fine, but just this once. That stuff will kill you"

"Not fast enough, apparently", I answer,

Getting back to my reading. She shakes her head, before walking off.

"Be back soon, ciao"

"Ciao", I replied,

Without averting my gaze from the pages.

As I was waited for her to get back, I decided to grab the water bottle I had in my backpack. Just then, my journal falls out from one of the compartments

Jeez, it must've been a while since I've cleaned this out.

I flip through the pages and come across one that was covered in hearts with arrows shot through them. The letters (Your First Initial) and S added together on the insides.

I've always had a thing for Shaggy. He was always such a sweetheart. I remembered how he would always give me the cherries off his sundaes, regardless of how much he wanted them.

"Shaggy, you don't have to keep giving me the cherries, if you want them", I say,

"Like, I know you want them, so...let me be a gentleman", he says,

Picking one off the vanilla ice cream and handing it over to me. For the first time ever, I decided to rid myself of the familiar shyness I was always plagued with and take it from him with my teeth, causing a bright red hue to brush against his cheeks.

"Like, wow", he giggled shyly.

Not to mention, how incredibly cute he was. I couldn't help but sigh at the memories of those pretty blue eyes staring back at me.

I knew I should've said something before we all split up, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it and besides, he probably didn't feel the same way.

As I was strolling down memory lane, I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"HiYAH!", I yell,

Hitting whoever it was in the shin, before pinning them to the tree by their throats. Once I realized who it was, I gasp.

"Like, wow", he grinned,

I couldn't help but feel a weird sense of Deja Vu when he said that.

"Shaggy! I am sorry!", I apologize,

Pulling away and fixing his shirt.

"Just as strong as I remember", he says,

Rocking back and forth on his heels, with the same old laugh I remember falling for. I chuckled and bent down to pick up my stuff.

"Oh, let me help you with that", he says,

Getting down and accidentally butting me in the head with his, causing us both to fall backwards, exclaiming in pain.

"Owie!", he whines,

Grabbing his forehead, as I laugh doing the same.

"Good to see you again, Shagster", I say,

"(Y/N)", I hear a familiar sound coming from behind me,

I turn around and see the best boy in the world.

"Scooby!", I yelp in excitement,

As he ran over, barking and greeted me with a lick to the face.

"Hiya, boy!", I scratch at the back of his head,

Whilst his tail wagged and foot tapped softly on the grass.

"Like, he really missed you!", Shaggy says,

Making me turn to face him.

"We both did", he admitted shyly,

My heart skipping a beat listening to his words.

"I missed you too, you screwball", I kid,

Getting back on my feet and finally embracing him. At first I felt his body stiffen against my touch, but he eventually melted into me and his arms go around the small of my waist.

We pull away and our lips were merely inches apart. It felt like time stopped and everything else disappeared around us. In that moment, we were the only people to exist.

"(Y/N)?"

"Shaggy?", I whisper,

Feeling the magnetic current pulling me closer towards him. Just as we were about to close the space between us, we were interrupted.

"Oh my god", Daphne says,

Carrying my food in her hands, watching us leap out off each other's arms.

"Shaggy?", she calls out,

"Oh, like, Hi, Daph!", he says,

"What are you doing here?", she chuckles,

Walking closer towards us and handing my the paper bag and drinks.

"Well, Scoob and I got this super creepy invitation to solve a mystery on-."

"Spooky Island", they both say in unison,

"Like, how groovy, man!"

My head snaps in his direction.

"Wait, you got invited too?", I ask,

"Well, yeah! Didn't you hear about the all-you-can-eat buffet they're hosting?", he questions,

Making me laugh to myself. Of course, he would go for the food.

"Well, let's hope we're the only ones who got the invite", Daphne says,

Walking into the airport. We take a moment to look back at each other, before shrugging and picking up my belongings. We trail behind her and made our way through the bustling crowd. I take a bite of my burger, before looking over and finding Shaggy ogling at it.

"Hm?", I hum,

Offering him a bite.

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly-"

"The plane won't be serving food till three", I interrupt,

"Who am I to deny such a gracious offer?", he jokes,

Making me chuckle to myself.

"Wanna go halfsies?", he asks,

"Sure", I agreed,

Watching him split the burger in half and handing me the bigger piece.

"Thank you", I say,

Continuing to enjoy my share, along with the fries I was already sharing with Scoob. I throw a fry in the air and laugh as the pooch jumps up to catch it.

While walking, Scooby grabs the dufflebag Shaggy was holding and made his way to the bathroom.

"Where's he going?", washing down the last bite down with my drink,

"Oh, you'll see", he replies,

It takes us a while, but we finally get to the check-in, where Daphne proceeded to argue with the man behind the desk.

"What do you mean I can't have seven carry-on bags?! That is so economy!", she complains,

"Yeesh", Shaggy muttered to me,

"Oh, that's just her makeup. You should see the suitcases full of costume changes and hair products", I say,

Making the tall geek laugh at my joke. I look around and my eyes fall on two very familiar faces.

"Daph?", Fred called out,

Catching my sister's attention.

"Crap", Velma muttered to herself,

"Oh, no. I'm not talking to you guys", she snapped,

Pretending to zip her lips shut and throwing away the key, but alas, she could not control her anger.

"What the heck are you doing here?", she questioned,

Watching the pair make their way over to us. That's when Fred eventually notices me and Shaggy.

"Oh, hey, you two", he greets,

We couldn't do anything but wave awkwardly.

"Isn't it obvious? We all received the same letter from one Emile Mondevarious...the reclusive owner of Spooky Island", Velma explained,

"It's not fair! I was gonna solve the mystery all by myself for the first time ever", Daphne argued,

As Fred scoffed. Oh no.

"How are you gonna save yourself when you get caught?", he poked fun at Daphne's past of always being the damsel in distress,

"I'm a black belt now. I've transformed my body into a dangerous weapon", she answered,

As him and Velma laughed at her response.

"It's true!"

"Far out! I guess we're, like, all going to Spooky Island, man!"

Daphne rolls her eyes and returns her attention to the check-in employee.

"Hey, where's Scooby?", she asks Shaggy,

Just then, the Great Dane, or should I say, Great Dame, emerges from the crowd. All dressed up in an long-sleeved dress, cheetah print reading glasses and a straw hat.

"Hello, sorry", he says,

Navigating his was through the fellow airport patrons.

"They don't allow big dogs on the plane", Shaggy explained nonchalantly,

As I let out a shocked laugh.

"You've got to be kidding", Velma protested the ridiculous disguise,

"No one is stupid enough to believe that", she added,

"Who's the ugly old broad?", Fred asks,

Leaning over to Shaggy. Velma shakes her head at Fred's naiveness and folds her arms over her chest.

"Say hello to Grandma", Shaggy announced,

"Attention. Flight 3774 to Spooky Island is now boarding", the announcer alerts through the telecom,

Everyone, besides Shaggy and I, groan before heading towards our terminal.

SHAGGY'S P.O.V

"Shall we?", I move over and gesture for her to step in front of me,

"My my my, what a gentleman. Just like I remember", she smiles,

Walking ahead.

"Nailed it", I sing to Scoob,

Before following behind her. We arrive inside the plane and take our seats. A moment passes and Scoob nudges me, before holding up the neck pillow we brought.

"Aaah"

I quickly picked up what he was putting down.

"Say, (Y/N)", I call out,

She turns back to me.

"Could I interest you in some in-flight comfort?", I ask,

Offering it to her. She grins to herself, before taking it.

"Why, thank you, Shagwell", she says,

Putting it on. I turn to Scoob and he raises his eyebrows at me.

"Butt out, Scoob", I scold in a whisper,

Before looking back at her. I swear heaven was missing an angel. Like, how could someone be this perfect? I could feel the blood rush up to my cheeks every time she spoke. It always felt like that one time with the cherries. Oh, man, did it make my heart go all squirrely.

I was never man enough to tell her how I really felt back then, but those two years without her was pure torture, man. It made me realize that I couldn't put myself through that again.

So, I take a deep breath and finally plucked the courage up the guts to come clean.

"(Y/N)?"

"Yes?"

"If we ever make it out of this, you know, with our head still attached to our necks"

Making her laugh. Gosh, were her little giggles music to my ears. Focus, Shaggy, Focus! I shake myself out of my distracting thoughts.

"Would you maybe wanna...I don't know...like...go out with me?", I ask,

Cringing in anticipation for the let-down of a lifetime.

YOUR P.O.V.

Was I hallucinating? There was no way on God's green earth was the man I'd been crushing on for literal years now actually reciprocating how I felt.

I pinch at my arm and hiss at the pain that brought me to the realization this wasn't just a scenario I dreamt up.

"Ow!"

"Like, what was that?", he yelped concernedly,

"Uh, nothing, it's just...", my sentence trails off into an awkward silence,

"I would love to!"

"Really?", his eyes widen,

"Really?", Scooby repeats,

"Really! I mean, I don't know if you've ever noticed, Shaggy, but, I've always liked you", I admit,

"...Get outta here, like, me too!", he responds,

"Wait, what?! Why didn't you say anything?!", I questioned,

"Well, I mean...look at you", he blushes,

Making the heat rush to me cheeks too, as I pout in awe.

"You're so pretty and smart and nice...and you share your food with me! I mean, that takes a whole lotta moxie!", he explained,

Gosh, was he freaking adorable.

"That totally puts you out of my league!"

"Oh, Shaggy", I sigh,

Taking his scruffy face in my hands.

"You're the best guy I know", I reassure,

"Which is why I'm gonna do what I should've done a long time ago", I say,

Closing the gap that wedge us apart for years by pressing my lips against his.

[spineless-lobster]

Fuck me okay it’s 12:50 and I have to wake up early for work tomorrow but I don’t give a shit HERE ARE MY INCOHERENT THOUGHTS ABOUT THE WISDOM SAGA

Legendary:

- TELEMACHUS IS SO ADORABLE OH MY GOD I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!

- FULL SPEED AHEAD!!!!

- ARGOS!!!! ARGOS MY BELOVED!!!!!

- bro just wants to see his dad is that so bad?

- WATCHU GONNA DO ABOUT IT CHAMP?????

Little wolf:

- AS MUCH AS A BANGER AS I THOUGHT IT WAS!!!!

- Antinous is such an asshole I love him “your mom’s a slut your dad left you and I’m gonna beat the shit out of you now”

- TELEMACHUS IS SO CUTE!!! Athena does quick thought and he’s like “WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING????” and when athena explains it all he’s oh “wait this is sick as hell!!!!” I love him your honour

- Rip telemachus still got your ass beat womp womp

We’ll be fine:

- THEY’RE BESTIES!!!!!! ATHENA AND TELEMACHUS ARE BESTIES WOOOOOO!!!!!!

- “I had a friend like you once” that reminds of how in the odyssey EVERYONE is like “wow telemachus you look just like your dad lol”

- they’re such cute besties I sure hope nothing bad happens to either of them! 😁

Love in paradise: (what the fuck)

- NAW WHEN ATHENA DID TIME DIVE AND ALL THE MUSIC PLAYED SUPER FAST ARE YOU BEING FOR REAL RIGHT NOW?????

- “Who’s penelope? 🥰” “my wife 😔” “😐”

- You can’t kill a goddess! *stream fucking dies*

- “I’m not your man” as “I’m just a man” what if I threw up

- y’know if calypso didn’t imprison odysseus on his island and harass him all the time I think I would like her

- also her voice is beautiful!

- NOT HER CALLING HIM ODY YOU CANT CALL HIM THAT!!!!!

- ody at the edge of the cliff… this part fucked me up

- SHE SAYS OPEN ARMS!!!! YOU CANT SAY THAT!!!

- POLITES!!!!!! 😭😭😭

- ALSJGLJSKFLFNGLSJFLSHDKSHDLSHDLAHDLSHDLSJGLSHDLSHDLSJFLSKDKDK ALL OF THE MOTIFS ALL AT ONCE WHAT THE FUCK NO NO YOU CANT DO THAT YOU CANT FUCKING DO THAT!!!!! STOP FUCKING STOP RIGHT NOW

- what if I killed myself then what

- jay when I find you it’s on sight

- straight up if I imagine ody’s pain for too long I get so incredibly sad it’s not even funny

- FREE MY MAN ODYSSEUS HE DID ALL THAT BAD SHIT BUT I DON’T CARE!!!!!

God games:

- LETS GOOOOO ANOTHER FUCKING BOOPPPP!!!!!!!

- APOLLO!!!!! <333

- I love songs with clanky bits like heph’s part it makes me :DDD

- Aphrodite’s voice is >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

- Ares’ flow is so insane I have it stuck in my head I love it

- beat the shit out of your brother athena lets goooo!!!!!

- HERA!!!!!! 🪩🕺🪩🕺🪩🕺🪩🕺

- GROOVY!!!!!!!

- “He never once cheated on his wife!” “…release him.”

- BEAST MODE ZEUS HOLY SHIT BEAST MODE ZEUS!!!!!!!

- SERIOUSLY THATS THE SICKEST THING EVER LUKE HOLT’S VOICE IS KN ANOTHER FUCKING LEVEL!!!!!!!

- TEAGAN’S VOICE TOO HOLY SHIT THIS SONG DEFINITELY HAS THE BEST VOCAL PERFORMANCES!!!!!!

- SHE CAN’T BE DEAD YOU CAN’T KILL A GODDESS SHE’S JUST TIRED SHE’S JUST SLEEPING!!!! EVERYTHING IS FINE!!!!!

…anyways so if you guys don’t hear from me it’s because I’ve run away to an isolated convent and have dedicated my life to god

Fuck what a good saga this was

[sweetdreamr]

if everyone in ragnarok had been in character

*Surtur scene*

Thor: Wait, is this a thing I do? Talk to myself? Have I always done this? It seems rather unhealthy.

Peter Parker: WOW, that’s judgey.

************************* *The Tragedy of Loki scene*

Loki as Odin, lounging around eating grapes: And that, my subjects, is how a total dipshit would impersonate me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have actual ruling to do.

**************************

*Tragedy of Loki Part 2*

Thor: Nothing will stop Mjolnir, even your face.

Loki as Odin: That would be terrifying if I didn’t know how to do this *fucking vanishes*

Thor: Fuck, I forgot he can do that.

**********************

Sidewalk scene:

*portal opens up underneath Loki*

Loki: *turns into a bird and flies above said portal*

Dr. Strange: Fuck, I forgot he can do that.

***********************

*Odin’s death scene*

Odin: I love you, my sons.

Thor: ....are you telling me, Father, that you made no plans in the event of your death? Which was inevitable, because as you yourself once said, “We are not gods. We are born, we live, we die.”????

Odin: *fucks off into glitter no that is seriously what happened*

Thor: That’s very pretty, Father, but I’m still angry.

Loki: Now I’m REALLY not sorry I sent him to Shady Pines.

**************************

*after elevator scene*

Thor: Hey, what’s that on your back?

Loki: Oh come on, that’s the oldest trick in the---

Thor: Never mind, it’s just your hair. *picks it off Loki’s shoulder*

Loki: For a moment I thought you were going to attach an obedience disc to my back and leave me convulsing for the Grandmaster to find and presumably melt.

Thor: That greatly offends me! Only a complete ass would do such a thing! The only way it could be worse is if I made a self-aggrandizing speech about heroism and change while engaging in an act of torture!

Loki: That would indeed be nonsensical. Nearly as bad as me plotting to betray you for mere coin. And confessing to it, before I am safely out of the way of your inevitable counterattack.

*both stare at the camera like on The Office*

**************************

*Hulk turns back into Bruce*

Bruce Banner: *completely freaking the fuck out* Wait, what do you mean I’ve been murdering slaves for the past to years? The whole reason I left Earth was to keep from hurting anyone else! Are we going to address this at all? At any point? Ever?

Thor: No, apparently we are to engage in ten minutes’ worth of jokes about the anal cavity of one called the Devil.

Bruce: .....wHAT?

****************************

*after being promoted to Executioner* Skurge: Um, my queen?

Hela: Yes?

Skurge: Why does the Goddess of Death need an Executioner? I mean, you can pretty much kill with a touch, right? You rule over the realm of the dead?

Hela: ...you know what? I’m honestly not sure.

Skurge: I mean, if having a fuckton of swords makes you the Goddess of Death, does that mean that if I  go to CostCo and get a cartload of drain cleaner, I’m the God of Death?

Hela: .....

*********************************

*Surtur destroys Asgard*

Korg: Whoops there goes your foundation.

Asgardians: Who the fuck is this asshole can we just grieve for our entire civilization in peace for ten seconds

[edensgaia]

Kaboodle [talking about Zam]: "We're not similar because we both have bloodlust, we/re similar because we both get– we both get picked on by the strongest people on the server, and fuck I wasn't any better. I'm not any better. If I'm picking on Zam too man, it's the same shit Mane did to me. What's the point, right?"

Kaboodle: "I'm a lot more similar to Zam than I thought I was, but not, you know... not because of who he once was."

Kaboodle: "[Reading chat] 'It comes full circle' Yep, I guess so! I guess so. [Laughs at the messages in the game chat] But, listen, I need to re-evaluate my goals a bit cuz yeah, it's fun, it's fun blowing stuff up, I agree, it's fun putting people in bad situations where they have to make tough choices and I enjoy all of that, but... doing that to Zam... It's not– It's not the morality of the situation that I wanna, you know, reconsider, cuz there's definitely some people that fucking deserve it, and... maybe some people that don't that I would still do it to anyway because it's fun, but... Zam's a weird case, cuz... he's... he's like me. He's like me. I don't know he... he's being harassed for weaknesses by Mane and– and Wemmbu and Flame. Which is the same shit Mane did to me. I don't think I quite realized that until he said it yesterday about why he does this stuff and why he's like this.

"[...] Yeah, it's uh, it's a weird situation chat, cuz it's like, I really enjoy fucking with Zam, I really do, but– it's not right. And beyond being not right, that I'm not willing to do, because it's literally just the same shit that I've been fighting against, and now I'm just– it's just generational bullying, that's what it is, it's just– Mane bullied me, I'm taking it out on Zam, and... the cycle never's gonna end if I keep doing that. Out of everyone, Zam is the last person to deserve that at all, honestly. And I need to solve that, I need to stop it, because right now, he's– you could see his fucking tab list [talking about Zam's skin, wich has one eye that is patched and the other one visibly bloodied], he's having a bad time. I mean he– he's never gonna trust me ever again, but... I guess the best I can do is leave him alone and– get myself in check, because I have other people to deal with.

"I have other people to deal with, I have a ManePear still to deal with, and that should be my priority. I'm not gonna have fun killing Mane but... there isn't a point going after Zam, it's just... he's just like me, and there's no point pilling things on top of each other, I don't know. I still believe that he's got the fucking evil inside of him, I still believe that, and I want to exploit that from him, but... not now. Cuz I wanna do it in a way that's fun, that's enjoyable and... kicking him while he's down makes him more miserable, and it's– it's not fun for me at all, right, what's the point in tearing someone down if you– oh my goodness, wow [looking at the damage done at spawn] Hmm, I did not realize how severe this was, holy shit. Wow. Wow. He's gonna have a rough time with this uh... but that's– that's not my jurisdiction anymore. I– I don't– I don't wanna talk to Zam [laughs] Honestly in any of the lights, I don't wanna speak to Zam, because... I don't know– it's... it's weird– it's– it's a weird thing, because it's like, I don't– I don't... I don't wanna trust people again, uh, like I trusted y'know, the Mice, and Red, but... [laughs] fuck, I don't wanna be alone again. And yeah I have my team, but is my team really a fucking team, are they really a team, let's be so for real.

"[Looking sadly at Zam's destroyed house at spawn] Oh Zam. I don't know. I– I empathize with Zam, I care about Zam more than I probably should, in all honesty. [Looking at spawn] Fuck, this is rough though. But he doesn't want my help and... I gotta respect that. And I don't wanna talk to him either because... he is scary. [Laughs] In all honesty, hes scary, cuz he makes me let my guard down, and I don't like that, so..."

[sardonic-the-writer]

—amsterdam

SUMMARY | agreeing to come along with the group to amsterdam to participate in not one, but two tom simons videos, can get a little crazy

PAIRING | cc!tommyinnit x reader

REQUESTED | no

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This was the third time Charlie had destroyed your lego creation, and you were this close to locking him out of the room.

"I swear to god you fucker—" Another blocky build crumbled to peices as the brunette slapped his hand down on your own pair, laughing good naturedly all the while.

"Phiiiiil!" You turned your torso halfway to whine at the other man in the generic hotel room, who was looking at his phone blandly while resting on the foot of a bed opposite you. "Tell Charlie to stop being an asshole before I bite him!"

"Stop being an asshole to them Charlie before they bite you. And they will, it's not just a threat mate." The middle aged man echoed back without so much as looking up from his phone.

"Wow. Gee thanks Phil. Glad to know my pain and suffering is less important than your phon—Charlie I swear to fucking god!! One more time, and I mean it, one more time and I'm going to sic Tubbo on you in the video tomorrow!" You had since stopped looking at Phil, now scooping as many stray legos as you could close to your chest while Charlie attempted to steal them away from you.

"I paid for these with my own twitch prime! Back! Back, I say."

"Noooo." Charlie made a sound that reminded you of a gremlin, wiggling his fingers comically while trying to take more out of your pile. "The lego goblin must have his legos!!! Otherwise he may become, the tickle monster!"

"Oh no he fucking wont." You deadpanned at Charlie. He just smiled back at you innocently before wiggling his fingers once more and lunging for you, nearly knocking you both into Phil on the other bed with the effort of it.

"Take that, you hoarder!" He laughed, glasses knocked askew as his hands viciously attacked your sides with pokes and jabs as you screamed.

"Jesus fucking christ you two!!" Phil was looking at the both of you on the floor, clutching his phone to his chest in surprise while laughing.

"Phil! Help me! I'm dying! Tell my wife that—that I love her." You choked out a surprisingly loud and shocking gasp before going limp, your tounge dramatically lolling out of your mouth the way a cartoon character's might.

It was a lot harder than you thought it would be to hold in your laughter as you watched Charlie fall to his knees somberly, listening as he wailed on about how he had 'killed' you. It was even harder when you got a glimpse of Phil sitting above you, stuffing his fist in his mouth to try not to laugh at the two of you.

"—ow will I ever redeem myself!? I'll be tried in court, given years of prison time! I'll never make it in there! I'm too soft, too—oh hey Tommy."

You immediately scrambled to get to your feet alongside Charlie at that revelation, the both of you adjusting your disheviled appearances the best you could all while Phil cackled.

"Hey Toms." You smiled crookedly, trying to look nonchalaunt as possible while looking at the confused face of the boy currently peaking his head into your hotel room. Light from the hallway was now peaking into the room, washing over the few shadows left from spare luggage and souvenir bags people had left lying on the floor.

"What the fuck are you guys doing in here?" He furrowed his brows, laughing lightly at how put of breath everyone was. "We can hear you all the way across the wall. Wil sent me over here to get you to shut up. Managment was looking pretty upset when I was making my way over here too. Might be because I stole some candy from the reception desk earlier too though." He muttered the last bit quieter, covering it up poorly with a cough before looking back at you.

"Oh. Uh, sorry about that. Well, I died for a little bit, I think?" You scratched the back of your neck. Charlie nodded vigorously. A bit too vigorously to be discussing the topic of your supposed death if you were being honest.

"Yes. And from natural causes. Definitely not murder of any sorts! No, not at all! An all natural one. All natural death that is."

Tommy just tilted his head in Phil's direction, clearly not believing either of your very convincing tales.

"They were having a tickle fight over the legos you lot bought earlier." He ignored you and Charlie's whines to shut up as he talked to Tommy, who by now was laughing.

"A tickle fight?" He stepped forward and closed the door behind him, blue eyes shining with mischief as he grinned. "Without me? For shame you bastards."

"No. Tommy dont you dare, I know what you're thinking, mate. No no no I'm not about to let all of you just—and there you go. For christ's sake, Wil's going to kill me."

Phil backed away further on the bed, just nearly being missed as Tommy jumped onto Charlie and sent him sprawling, the two of them rolling around in a blur of colors in the hotel room while each tried to overpower the other.

You yourself were practically kneeling over with laughter, pumping a fist in the air while rooting for Tommy, only stopping at one point to pick up Charlie's glasses off the ground so they wouldn't get crushed in all the chaos.

It didn't last long, really, before Charlie let out a guttural cry and replicated what you had done earlier, falling limp as if he was now nothing but a corpse on a battlefield.

"And the winner is Tommathy Innit!!" You hollered cheerfully despite the groans of Phil to shut up, beaming at Tommy as he stood triumphantly, Charlie laying on the ground below spread out like a starfish. A very sweaty, very exhausted starfish. You imagined that you didn't look much different from him at the time though.

"Thank you, thank you! Really!" Tommy was now parading around the small confines of the room with his nose in the air. Doing what sounded like a very bad impression of a snooty car salesman as he went. "I'd like to thank my many wives, including Philza Minecraft's, and—oof!"

Everyone laughed as they watched Tommy shakily raise a fist from where he was now lying face first on the carpet, shooting a thumbs up to let you all know that he was okay from his sudden trip over a luggage bag.

"Graceful mate. Real graceful. Watch out for the suitcases next time though, Tommy."

"Fuck you lot." Was all he said before dissolving into laughter, most everyone following suit.

[brooooswriting]

Prompt list

My first prompt list and I’m honestly not quite sure how this works. But send me a prompt and a character (you can find the characters I write for in my guidelines) :) I’m happy about request and recommendations

1. “I’m not stupid, who is s/he?

2. “I’m not flirting with anyone”

3. A: “We have a problem”

B: “no, you got a problem. I got you”

4. “If I could, I would kiss all your scars away”

5. “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this”

6. “I don’t want to think about what life would be like without you”

7. “Do you want to stay tonight?”

8. “I killed him and I’d gladly kill him again”

9. “Don’t panic, but I think there’s someone in our house”

10. “How bad is it?”

11. “Cmon, I’ll carry you”

12. “I can’t get up”

13. “I threw up”

14. “You’re burning love”

15. “I can protect myself”

16. “Don’t touch me! GET OFF”

17. “You look beautiful”

18. “You left me. I stayed, I waited”

19. “You have the most amazing eyes”

20. “How’d you this scar?”

21. “We have time”

22. “You can still use your legs, so don’t say that I was jealous again”

23. “If even one of them touches you again, I’ll make sure they aren’t able to ever again”

24. “I’m overreacting?”

25. “Don’t cover my bite marks, or I might just have to add more”

26. “Wow, you really thought you could trust me?”

27. “You belong to me”

28. “I dare you”

29. “You can’t restart life once you make a mistake”

30. “You should be with someone who values you”

31. “I do not like (x), I like you you idiot”

32. “(X) doesn’t understand what they’re missing”

33. “If I was your girlfriend, I’d …”

34. “Can you picture me and you together?”

35. “My grandma thinks we are dating”

36. “Can’t sleep again”

37. “It’s past midnight, why are you still up?”

38. “Let’s get you some sleeping pills”

39. “She’s not your property”

40. “There is us, there never was”

41. “Keep lying and I’m out”

42. “Is this all I was to you?”

43. “You thought this was real?”

44. “All they ever did was take advantage of you. Why can’t you see that?”

45. “Tell me a story”

46. “It’s time to move on”

47. “I’m gonna take a shower, you should join me. You know, save water”

48. “Calm down! You’re scaring me”

49. “I’m done trying to fix you”

50. “I see your face everywhere… don’t you understand that?”

51. “I wasn’t enough for you, you made that clear”

52. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake to. Go back to sleep my love”

53. “Can I borrow your hoodie?”

54. “It kills me to imagine you with somebody else”

55. “You don’t own me”

56. “Can you come and get me?”

57. “You’re freezing, let’s go inside. I don’t want you to catch a cold”

58. “I don’t want you to be disappointed”

59. “It’s cute, this thing you’re doing”

60. “You should eat something”

61. “Who did this to you?!”

62. “You look like you need a hug”

63. “I love you, but you need to shut up”

64. “They’re coming. Kiss me”

65. “I’m flirting with you”

66. “I’m just so tired all the time”

67. “Would you like to take a nap with me?”

68. “Can I braid your hair?”

69. “You’re not your past”

70. “That’s not what I meant and you know it”

71. “You can cry, there’s no shame in it”

72. “You don’t do that with me”

73. “You’re not making sense dear”

74. “You feel like home”

75. “Is s/he really just a friend?”

76. “I promise I am trying”

77. “I can fix it, I will fix it”

78. “I can’t breathe around you”

79. “Don’t give me space. That’s the last thing I want”

80. “If you were any less threatening, you’d be a dandelion”

81. “I just adore you”

82. “Did I do good?”

83. “Let’s run away then”

84. “You shouldn’t trust me”

85. “What if you get hurt?”

86. “I like to do it for the plot”

87. “You are ticklish, that’s so cute”

88. “Can you warm me? I’m freezing”

89. “If you steel the blanket I’m gonna put my cold feed on you”

90. “This is low, even for you”

91. “I promise it didn’t mean anything”

92. “How much cold medicine did you take?”

93. “Get behind me”

94. “Touch her one more time and I’m gonna kill you”

95. “I want a family… with you”

96. “You’re more than a one night stand”

97. “Say that one more time and I’ll whoop your ass”

98. “My family likes you more than they like me”

99. “Every day feels like a burden”

100. “I may be a hero but I’d end the world for you”

[perpetualexistence]

Remember Total Drama Action: Best Game Ever?

In case you don't, it was a flash game that came around when Total Drama Action was airing live. You play as an intern who got to interact with the cast on TDA. You could make alliances with contestants by performing tasks for them, and certain alliances would damage your relationships with others. You'd also perform tasks for Chris. You also had constant enemies that you could beat with weapons that you could upgraded the more tasks you did for Chris. A fact I'd COMPLETELY forgotten about until now. When it was live, you'd get new tasks each week, and you could save your progress by making an account on Cartoon Network.

When I was watching TDA and way, WAY before I was in the fandom, and before I even knew what fandoms WERE, I remember playing it. My favorite character actually used to be Leshawna. I barely even remembered Noah existed, sweet little naive child I was. As a result, I of course immediately made an alliance with her, and thus got Heather as an almost instant enemy. It was great, and I've got very fond memories of it.

Why do I bring this up?

Well, thanks to @wheredidalltheusersgo, I managed to find a working link of the game: https://www.numuki.com/game/tda-best-game-ever/

You can only play as a guest since the original server is long since gone. But as I've found through trial and error, the site actually DOES save your progress even if you close it.

So obviously I had to play it again. I was having so much fun I started taking screenshots because of how wild certain things were. I thought you guys might enjoy them as much as I did, so I figured I might as well post them here.

I'd also completely forgotten you could customize your character. Got to make sure she looks Fresh for FreshTV.

Perfect. We're serving off-Izzy vibes and are rocking a fedora. Time to get through this tutorial shit so I can talk with the besties.

Cue me doing a bunch of fetch quests for Chris. Most of them require going into little studios based on each of the episodes. I'm pretty sure when it was live each studio was closed until the corresponding episode aired, and then would open up once the episode released. In this version though, they're all open.

There's also a lot of beating critters up with a stick. Like for the alien studio they're guys in alien costumes, for the beach it's a bunch of crabs and sharks, etc. You can avoid most of them by running around them, though you only get money for beating them. Which you of course need to get newer outfits to look Even Fresher. So death to all who oppose me I guess.

Through me trial and erroring if this game did save, I accidentally screwed myself out of getting into an alliance immediately after I was done with the tutorial. Once you get started on one of Chris's tasks, you have to do them to completion, and they usually come in groups of threes. No big deal though. Just have to do the last one for this second wee-

Jesus CHRIST Heather, you seriously take no survivors.

Either way, tasks are done, now time to choose an ally. The options include all of the TDA contestants, plus Geoff and Bridgette. None of the peanut gallery for that season sadly.

I could just do Leshawna for old time's sake. Or I could have this be the start of my villain arc and go with Heather. Hmm, decisions decisions...

Well, I already look like off-Izzy, might as well pair up with actual Izzy!

Wow your pixels are so crunchy, Izzy. Especially compared to my character's.

Still, I knew I made the right choice with you, Izzy. Out for blood from the get go. Never change. Time to go ruin Heather's day.

Heather's are even CRUNCHIER.

Also, is that genuine gratitude? From Heather? Receiving what she thinks is just a regular gift box?

Guys, I just might be the monster here.

And after killing some crabs for Izzy, my rampage of terror shall continue! Somebody's really got it out for her ex.

I didn't take screenshots of it, but after completing each of the antagonizing tasks, both Heather and Justin came up to us swearing that we would pay. Which means now the top right of my screen has this on it:

At least here the pixels are a lot less cronchy. Still, Justin's angry face is Sending Me. I can't explain exactly why. Maybe it's because it highlights just how much of his face is CHIN.

Still, I have done what is required for my new bestie, time to reap the rewards.

Yeah this feels about right.

And that's all I did before I decided it was time to take a break before I got in too deep! (I already am, but shhhh don't tell me-)

If you guys are interested in seeing more of my shenanigans, let me know. I'm probably going to keep playing and taking screenshots as more wild things happen.

But for now, I need to actually go eat dinner. I seriously need food, the allure of nostalgia was just too strong.

[papermint-airplane]

Eleanor: Whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean 'who is Aiden'?! He's the Bachelor! You know, the whole reason we're competing in the first place?!

Angela: Surely you can't be serious!

Rose: I am serious! 🤭 And don't call me--

Viridia: IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE, I WILL END YOU MYSELF.

Eleanor: Gaaaaaaah, I hate you people.

Angela: Then I guess I need you to explain a lot more than the murder attempt because if you aren't competing for Aiden's heart -- the alleged premise of the show -- what are you competing for?

Rose: I. keep. TELLING YOU! I want to WIN! 😠

Angela: Yes, but win what?!

Rose: Uggggh, you're so dense, it physically hurts. 😩

Viridia: STOP TALKING IN CIRCLES AND JUST EXPLAIN SOMETHING FOR ONCE!

Rose: Haven't you ever heard the expression 'winning isn't everything, it's the only thing'? 🙄

Angela: Yeah, I've heard toxic Little League coaches say that to crying seven year olds. And?

Rose: Seriously?! It's the principle I've based my entire life on! It's my mantra! My raison d'être! 👿

Viridia: WATCH OUT, SHE'S GOING FRENCH AGAIN.

Angel: So the whole reason you snuck back into the house, disguised yourself as a mime, sloppily painted your blue stripes purple, tried to kill Angela, and potentially scarred Aiden for life was...because of an expression everyone uses ironically?

Rose: It's not ironic to me, dammit! It's my sole purpose in life! Everyone knows that, even the Watcher! And she...she used it against me. 😓 She promised me that if I made the competition interesting for her, she'd let me back into the house.

Eleanor: Wait. What?! Say that again.

Rose: When I broke into her control room, she made me an offer: I'd get to come back and compete again as long as I did something to shake up the status quo. She was getting bored of you idiots. 🥱

Angel: I-I can't believe this.

Bailey: I know what you mean...

Angel: One of us got to meet the Watcher in person and it wasn't me.

Rose: Look, Angel, if it makes you feel any better, she's not what you think. She's...crazy. 😦

Bailey: High praise coming from you.

Rose: And not only that, she seriously doesn't know how 'Earth reality shows' as she calls them work because holy shit, this whole thing has been one clusterfuck from the beginning. 🙄 She says it's a Bachelor-type dating show but she's run the whole thing like a survival show with the challenges and eliminations. I mean half of us haven't even met this Arwin-or-whatever, let alone been on a date with him. What sense does that make?! 😵

Aiden: It's Aiden. I'm Aiden!

Eleanor: You're right. I thought this whole thing was shoddily arranged but I've never seen any reality dating shows. For all I knew, this is how they're supposed to be.

Rose: Well I've seen hundreds of them, and believe me, this is not how they're supposed to be. Arlo is supposed to spend time with all of us one-on-one, not be shoved into a pod by himself ninety percent of the time. 😣 I don't know how they do shows like this back on her planet but it's not how we do it on Earth. 👽

Eleanor: On...her...planet? The Watcher is an alien?

Rose: Well duh. 😑 You couldn't tell? Why do you think she abducted us all at the casting call? She had to get us on more familiar turf.

Angel: That doesn't make any sense. The Watcher can't be an alien. She's an eternal extra-dimensional being of pure benevolence.

Viridia: WILL YOU SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR RELIGION, ALREADY?! CLEARLY SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON.

Eleanor: I knew it, we really are in the Lunar Lakes moon settlement. I could tell from the trees. But...why are we the only Sims here?

Rose: I don't know and I don't care. 🤨

Wow. You really exposed me to everyone, huh, Rose?

Rose: You exposed yourself! You should have just let me win from the jump and I wouldn't have had to tell everyone what I knew. 😖

I guess it really is a good thing I didn't tell you the whole plan, then, huh? Otherwise you'd have run your mouth to Aiden.

Rose: Yeah yeah, Argyle or whoever-the-fuck. Well, I held up my end of the bargain. You're going to call this whole thing off and just announce me the winner, riiiiight? 🤤

Why would I do that?

Rose: Because...I made things interesting for you, like we agreed on. 😕

Then why am I still bored?

Rose: I-- 😶

You haven't won anything, Rose. You're still the same loser you were when you walked into this place on the first day. And that's all you'll ever be.

Rose: ...

Nothing to say to that?

Rose: I am going to kick. your. ass. 😡

[Beginning] [Previous] [Next]

[misc-obeyme]

that fem villain mammon art makes me feel so many things, i went crazy when i saw it and my tags for it reflected that

LIKE I'LL JOIN YOUR SIDE ANY DAY MA'AM, JUST ONE CHANCE IS ALL I NEED PLEASE INCAN MAKE YOU SO HAPPY

if there was ever a curse where mammon got turned into a woman, I'd die on the spot. Solomon had an experiment that went wrong and now him and Mammon are affected (mcsolomams heart says it's because they were all hanging out together in his room)

I can only imagine what they would do if they both got turned 😭 team up and mess with me probably. please guys i am fragile, and i WILL run away and hide for my own sake. Like they think i get flustered now?? crank it up to ten. THEY'D GET A KICK OUT OF IT TOO !!! i hate them (said with sickening affection)

like the dame events had me in a chokehold. I can tell you I definitely dropped my phone and yelled when I saw the mammon card like HE HAS A THIGH ACCESSORY AND MESH PANELING AND LIPSTICK that i want to ruin WHO SAID RHAT

i am just a weak woman when it comes to pretty women *head in hands* it's the bisexual in me

anyway HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL !!! work is breathing down our necks to meet our credit card goals, and my store manager is trying to plead for me and the replen manager to get a raise so HOPING !!! (IT WASN'T A RUMOR TECHNICALLY YIPPEE)

I've started giving my cashiers stickers for getting any kind of sign up or application and 😭 it's kinda endearing how excited some of them get. Like even the one's who seemed kinda skeptical/thought it was silly are immediate telling me over the walkie when they get something

barbatos giving mammon stickers when he gets good grades, or a shiny sticker and a kiss when it's an A grade

ALSO MY STORE MANAGER GAVE ME A $25 GIFT CARD TODAY AND BOUGHT US PIZZA BECAUSE I WAS WORKING THE MORNING FOR ONCE 😭 HE SAID THEY REALLY MISSED ME WHILE I WAS ON VACATION LOLOL

okay im done I think HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT/AFTERNOON!!!!

OKAY RIGHT. The bisexual in me was also freaking out lol. I was like wow I don't think I've ever wanted anyone to step on me before, but FOR HER-

They would absolutely mess with you, there is no way that scenario could go down any other way lol. Like oh? You like us this way, huh? Let us show you just what we can do~

Cue heavy flirting and teasing and wow I would not be strong enough to resist them.

Oh yeah Mammon's dame card nearly killed me with his stupid thighs I was like EXCUSE YOU. How dare you, you were already pretty enough as a man, now you're gonna go ahead and hit me with the thigh bling??

OH YAY I hope they get you that raise!!! You deserve it!!

Listen, I would be thrilled if someone was giving me stickers for doing a good job. It's the simple human brain, we like rewards. I have a sticker system for when I'm actually writing my novels where I award myself a sticker for every 500 words I write. Needless to say they haven't seen any use in ages because I abandoned my novels for fanfic lol. I tried using them for that instead but it was harder because I never know how many words things are gonna end up. At least with novels I know it's gonna be over 50k so like 500 is a good goal for a daily amount. (And I always wrote more than that anyway so my little section gets full up with sparkly stars tee hee~)

Anyway, the point here is that stickers are fun and make people happy!

Now listen... Barb's rewards for Mammon are officially in smut town because of the tags you left on that fic, by the way. I was like OH. That's right, he did abandon his homework to come be with Barb and if Barbatos knew that...? Anyway part two is going to be posted soon and you'll see. Not me already thinking about part three, I have a problem.

YESSSS pizza!! This is the thing, employers don't know how much they rely on you until you're gone! LOL!

I hope you have a lovely day/night as well! 💕

[deludedfantasy]

Trimax Vol 12 Ch 5-9

Alright, here goes, second half of the volume. As always my suffering continues and I wanted to shake Vash the Stampede because he has no sense of self-preservation.

Ch 5 

Listen, I’ll never be able to shut up about how much Vash loves humanity despite how terrible they’ve been to him. He knows!! He knows how awful people can be! He’s witnessed it firsthand. But still, he says, “I can’t judge them. I don’t know what they’ve been through or what led them here. Because there’s always a reason.” 

It reminds me of the ultimate thesis of The Good Place: That people can only be judged by the circumstances and the world they were raised in, because that influences so much of how we act and the choices we have about who we are and who we can be. 

I can’t believe Vash stayed with Knives for 80 years after the Fall. Considering how angry he was at his brother, it’s mind-boggling. On the other hand, he didn’t have anyone else. Vash, at this point, didn’t know or understand humanity beyond Rem. All he has in this world is Knives, so he can’t leave him. That knowledge that they’re stuck together even though Vash doesn’t want to be is what makes them grow apart. 

Can’t believe Vash has had the same backpack for 70 years. That bag must be indestructible or something. 

They’re still so young is what gets me. They might be eighty, but they still look and likely act a bit like children. Is it an Independent Plant thing or have they been stunted, only spending time around each other for so long? 

Also, love that one day Vash just decides to get in a stranger’s car to get away from Knives. 

Once again, Vash points a gun at Knives…and he doesn’t shoot. Knives get in his face and puts his head to the barrel and still, Vash doesn’t shoot. 

Knives has never had a problem killing, especially to protect his brother, who he thinks is a naive idiot. He murdered an entire village, adults and children, just to protect him from whatever they were going to do to him. 

How does Knives manage to look so young and innocent after murdering an entire town?

So interesting to me how Vash asks Knives to stay with him when his brother walks away. If I’m reading this right, Knives decides to leave him once and for all, because he’s done dealing with Vash’s human sympathies. But even though Vash was the one who walked away first, he doesn’t want his brother to go. If it was just about not killing people he would’ve just said, “Don’t go.” But instead, he says, “Stay with me.” Stay with me, don’t leave me by myself. Somewhere deep down, Vash still loves him and he doesn’t want to see Knives become this. 

Is this the first time Vash shoots somebody? It’s so brutal that the first person he ever shoots, the reason he picked up a gun in the first place, is his own brother. 

It doesn’t even seem to do much to him. It’s more of a nuisance. But Knives lobs it back at him tenfold. Because he doesn’t really care about Vash. He casually chops his entire arm off just to teach him a lesson. That a gun—a human weapon—will never be as powerful as the blades of an Independent Plant. 

Then, Vash spends the next 70 years training to prove him wrong. This moment, this failure, it’s what sits at the core of Vash and what motivates him to become the gunman, Vash the Stampede. Because next time, he won’t miss. 

Though I don’t actually think he was shooting to kill in this moment. That was the intent Knives put on him. I think Vash just wanted to get his attention, but Knives turned it into that and Vash ran with that because that’s a lot simpler than the very complicated feelings he has about him.

“Don’t worry, Knives. This time, when you go, I go.” Vash…please don’t say that. He’s so ready to die for this. He doesn’t see a future for himself anymore. 

Actually, what is Vash doing? He doesn’t just miss, he’s too good to do that. He’s up to something. 

Wow, I hate how right my last thought was. Vash, stop talking like this! I think there are many people that would disagree with this statement!

Ch 6

Is Knives creating holes in his body to dodge Vash’s shots? Because that’s…urgh. That’s a lot. 

Ah-ha! Vash does have some other plan in the works that doesn’t involve outright killing Knives. And Knives is just now starting to get it. The way he looks down on Vash and humans will ultimately be his downfall. He thinks the fact that Vash won’t kill is stupid and naive but then also thinks that humans are terrible because they’re nothing but murderous scum…while he also goes around murdering people left and right. Ah, Knives, your hypocrisy knows no bounds. 

Oh, they’re trying to communicate with the dependent Plants! This has never been brought up as a possibility before. Is that what the conversation in the Plant room a couple chapters ago was about? 

Knives just doesn’t get it. It’s not necessarily about forgiveness (though Vash certainly has thoughts about that too). It’s about understanding, and not letting your impulses and first impressions cloud your judgment completely. As the story Vash then tells goes on to prove.

Those people were preying on travelers for a reason. They’d been turned out from everywhere else because they were contaminated. They had no other way to survive. If I’m reading this right, those people in the village were the same ones that had fought so hard to keep the contamination from spreading so far. In doing something noble, they damned themselves. It’s the tragedy of human existence collapsed into one story.

And that poor girl. She survived the contamination and Knives’s slaughter. She lost everyone she cared about because she refused to shun them as everyone else did. Being a survivor twice over is a terrible thing. But also, she’s the embodiment of human love in the midst of tragedy. She didn’t dismiss them, despite the contamination and what they did to survive. She loved them because they were hers, and it didn’t matter what had become of them. 

The fact that Vash stayed and listened, tried to understand, says a lot about him. He has always wanted to understand humanity, its good parts and its bad parts. That’s why he defends them so fervently, because he has experienced the whole of the human condition, unlike Knives who is so stuck on only the worst of humanity, refusing to see the good that survives despite all the tragedy. 

You say it, Vash! Knives is ignorant. His arrogance is a shield that protects him from harm but also keeps him from seeing the hard truth. 

Goddammit, it’s the military! I completely forgot about them. Thank God for whoever is driving that shuttle, otherwise Vash would’ve had to spend much more of himself stopping the Plants from getting hurt than focusing on Knives. 

Ah, yay, Meryl and Milly to the rescue! Causing chaos in the name of Vash the Stampede, as they should. 

Don’t be sorry, Brad! Vash is grateful (and also probably thinking how much he doesn’t deserve it, but we’re gonna ignore that) and it’s exactly what he needed in that moment. 

Being reminded that he has friends to help him will only give him the strength he needs to keep fighting. 

Oh no, I feel so bad for Chronica. She’s lost her friend. And obviously, Domina was much younger than her, someone with a bright future that Chronica was so looking forward to seeing. Now, Knives has taken that away from her. Except it’s only strengthened her will. She’s about to go all out in the name of revenge, I can tell. 

Ch 7

Oh no, Meryl and Milly are in trouble! Not my best girls!

Was that Vash’s blood? What happened? Because it doesn’t look like Knives actually got a hit in. 

Oh…he’s bleeding from the eyes and the everywhere? I guess? Because he’s pushing himself to the brink of death and using up all of his power. 

I need to include this panel because…just look at him! He’s bleeding from the eyes again, this time because he’s pushing himself to the brink of death to fight Knives. And he’s so determined to do it. There’s nothing in those eyes but raw will and hatred. 

So the Earth fleet isn’t aware of Vash’s presence at all! They’re gonna be in for a big surprise when they realize there’s another Independent on the planet and he’s trying to stop Knives. 

Yay, Livio to the rescue! He’s helping out the girls because they’re Vash’s friends. He’s so nervous though, and I totally get it, but he’s not messing anything up. Livio is so hard on himself because he wants to do better, but Livio, my friend, a little awkwardness never hurt anyone. 

Livio has turned over a new leaf, but he’s still gonna do things his way. Which means not tip-toeing around talking or negotiating, but acting. But he’s right. There’s only so long they can keep the military distracted. They have to find a way to stop them so they don’t keep interfering with what Vash is doing because he can’t afford to be distracted from his fight with Knives for a second.

Ahhhhh, Vash is running out of time! Knives knows it too and he’s using it to his advantage, tiring him out rather than killing him, because Vash is basically doing his job for him. 

Also, I remember someone mentioning how Nightow doesn’t use the character coughing blood/bleeding from the nose trope often so it’s really significant and shows how dire things are when they do. And when was the last time we saw someone bleeding like this? When Wolfwood was on the verge of death…

Ch 8

We’re receiving so much Plant lore here. It’s so interesting that they apparently don’t have a sense of self. But from what I understand, they aren’t a hive mind either! They’re like a collective consciousness, each individual adding up to a whole. Add Independents into the mix though and then things get a lot more complicated. Because it seems like they’re the ones who are behind all the fusing even though dependents Plants are probably capable of it on their own.

Vash, no!!!! I can’t tell, did Knives hit him with something or did Vash just overextend himself and collapse in a bloody heap? Either way, he’s just spurting blood everywhere and I’m scared. 

Meanwhile, Livio is out here serving absolute cunt, if I do say so myself. 

Oh Vash…despite how hurt and exhausted he is, he’s still trying to get up. He’s sees the world and the city, and it’s enough to remind him what he’s fighting to protect. All those people huddled down there, all of his friends. He’s not done until he knows they’re safe. He has to see this to the bitter, bloody end. 

Elendira? Chronica?? Legato??? What’s going on? There’s a lot of people popping up out of nowhere!

Though it seems like connecting with the Plants gave Chronica a better view of the situation on the planet because now she knows Knives’s name and is apparently going after him directly. 

Also, who was Vash planning to shoot? Knives? Is that why Legato finally makes his appearance? To keep Vash from killing Knives? 

Ch 9

And now we briefly return to Vash in the oubliette. Sorry, I still can’t get over that Knives get him locked in a glorified hole in the ground for 7 months. 

Apparently, during that time Vash tried talking some sense into Legato and learned how pointless of an exercise that is. Because Legato is devoted. His life doesn’t matter, only serving Knives does. And this chapter, we’re gonna find out why that is.

Oh boy, I’m not prepared to read this again. I was truly not expecting what I found out the first time and it’s haunted me ever since. 

Suddenly, everything about Legato makes sense. Of course he hates humanity. He watched them pass him by every day as he suffered, as he was used. It takes a special kind of rage and hurt to produce the kind of hatred in a person that would lead to them using their powers to slaughter an entire city. 

Something in me also squirms uncomfortably at the idea of Legato wanting to serve him after all he’s been through. But then again, at least this time he gets to choose who he serves and what he does. This being had the power to decimate all those people Legato hated in an instant. He gave him the revenge he’d craved for so long. All that power Knives had, isn’t it what he’d dreamed of having himself when he made his plans to slaughter that town? 

And how strange that must be for Knives. A human wanting to serve him, being awed by him. Does he think this is the treatment he deserve as a Plant? What exactly was going through his head when Legato sank to his knees and offered him his service? This is likely the first time he’s let a human get so close to him on their own. It’s such an intriguing meeting that leads to an even more intriguing dynamic. 

A lot of people have said it better than I have, but Knives does seem to care about Legato. He probably recognizes in him the way humanity uses and discards things so easily. In a way, they’re kindred spirits. But the downfall of their relationship is that Knives ideology keeps him from truly getting close to Legato or letting him in. Because all humans are bad and evil, and in the end, even Legato has to die. 

Hang on, is the implication here that Knives was the one who named Legato? I can’t even put into words how big a deal that is. A name is huge, it’s a marker of individuality and humanity and the fact that Knives gave that to someone, let alone that he did that for a human, is kinda insane.

[therealtsk]

Destiny's Lore, and Why It Didn't Need The Witness

So, I know most of you follow me for Worm or DC stuff, so here's an admission of my tragic past: I used to be a big Destiny fan! I know, I know, i'm losing followers by the letter, but in my defense, I dropped out years ago, around Shadowkeep. I briefly checked the game out again during the Witch Queen but never actually finished the campaign since I didn't have any friends to play it with at the time and so I couldn't force myself back into it's goddawful grind. To be clear, I've never played Destiny for the gameplay. I'm one of those weirdos who actually really, really liked the setting's lore and world building. It was one of the most unique things I'd ever seen, this really engaging mix of high fantasy and sci-fi all at once. And you know what? Some of Destiny's lore books are honestly incredible! The writing is emotional, the prose evocative, so many alien perspectives expertly captured. The Books of Sorrow, Thorn, Truth to Power, Book of Unveiling, The Ahamkara gear...goddamn, they're so good. But I got caught up on Destiny lore a little bit ago, and...wow. Bungie did it. They killed the last thing I still loved about Destiny. And they killed it with the Witness.

Let's talk about the Witness for a bit. The Witness has taken the slot of the new Big Bad for the Destiny universe, previously held by The Darkness. Their backstory is that they used to be individuals of a race that was the first to be blessed by The Traveler, Destiny's slated Big Good. This race proceeded to have a golden age that lasted for eons, with them eventually running out of things to do, and thus asked the Traveler to tell them what their purpose is. Obviously, the Traveler didn't answer, and their entire civilization had a collective existential crisis so hard that they decided that if the universe didn't come pre-built with a purpose, they'd just kill everyone and reboot the universe so that it did. To accomplish this, they tracked down the Traveler's never-before mentioned Dark counterpart and all fused into a single being, seen here. And on the topic of the Witness's appearance, I'm sorry, but the visual design here is just...bad. It's just bad. It's almost painfully generic. They have a geometrically rippling long black coat with no defining features, a pale human-ish face, and their brain appears to be leaking other faces in a smokecloud constantly, which i think looked far cooler on paper then it did in a render. Compare this to Savathûn or even Oryx's visual designs and they don't hold a candle. Speaking of comparisons to the Hive Gods, this is where my rant truly begins, so buckle up.

The fact that the Witness has all but replaced the Darkness- newly released lore suggesting every time we thought a character was interacting with the Darkness itself, it was really them talking to this character- that the Darkness is now stated to be completely apathetic and unintelligent, nothing more then a power source to draw upon- not only runs directly counter to some of my favorite lore in the franchise but cheapens every other Darkness-affiliated plot line and character. Not only does the Witness not speak at all like The Darkness has in the past, making the claim of them being one and the same dubious to me, but it also results in all of the Witness' Disciples (their right-hand men) being shoehorned into storylines in ways that feel almost painfully lazy. Case in point: The Lore of the Hive. As mentioned above, The Books of Sorrow is some of my favorite sci-fantasy with fantastic horror elements and incredibly evocative bits of prose. It's a gripping narrative how in the face of utter annihilation, a group of siblings make a desperate bargain with unknowable creatures once kept buried beneath the earth...and how their once noble efforts to save their people from death turns into a bloody conquest across the stars. It's an excellent tale, showing us how the truest test of character is who you are when times are hard- will you let those hard times twist you into a foul shape, or will you endure in spite of them? It establishes the cosmology of Destiny, with the Hive and Worm Gods being established as some of the most powerful and important beings in the story, powerful disciples of The Deep. With the new retcons, Rhulk (a Disciple of the Wintess) shows up, basically tells the Worms to shut up and listen cause he's the real Disciple of the Darkness, not them, and they're going to fall in line now. Because now, instead of the syzygy being a real threat that did devastate the planet the Krill lived on, Bungie's saying that the entire thing was a lie created by the Witness and the Worm Gods. Which takes the aspect of "sometimes bad things just happen but it's up to us to choose how we will let those things change us" that's key to the narrative and completely removes it- which is so backwards from how this all works! Evil lives in all of us, waiting for when we're weak to tempt us into doing what's wrong in the name of survival or pleasure or whatever virtue it disguises itself as- it doesn't stroll up out of nowhere and create a twelve-step-point-plan to ensure that we become evil too! Putting aside that, as I admit it's a subjective criticism based on my own perspective on the nature of morality, I think it greatly cheapens multiple other stories. Now that the Darkness is completely amoral as a force and it's just the Witness who is corruptive, I guess Dredgen Yor, Jana-14 and all of the other guardians we've seen fall were all getting brain blasted by this one dude, instead of their falls being a result of being seduced by power they should have known better then to touch blindly. Now, I can already hear people saying "But what about Stasis!" And yeah, I have Thoughts on Stasis too. I don't entirely dislike it, but I do dislike how it's been executed. Sword Logic works- or worked- by basically asserting yourself above physical reality. "I am the strongest thing alive, and I prove it thus." You defeat a powerful enemy and take their strength for your own. That's something you can work as being doable without inherently corrupting you. After all, it's not considered evil to fight for your own survival or for the protection of others. It just so happens that constantly introducing your brain to the idea that killing other things will make you objectively better then them is bad for you even if those powers weren't sourced from a primordial consciousness that has and will try to influence you for it's own ends.

To use a metaphor, Sword Logic is akin to something like nuclear power- sure, it's got one hell of a kick, but if you let your guard down around it, not only will it fuck you up but it'll contaminate everything around you with the fallout. But now to say that "nope, the darkness is totally fine and not even alive and aware it's just the same thing as the light but different colors and this whole time it's just been this one guy who's been ruining it for everyone else" is so...god, it's so much less interesting. And I think ultimately, that's my problem with the Witness. As a whole, they are just so much less interesting then what we had before! I loved the Books of Sorrow and Unveiling so much because it was such a fascinating display of completely alien thought and genuine nuance. The Darkness doesn't do what it does because of any tired trope of "evil nihilist" or just might makes right, it's a living embodiment of a cosmic philosophy in a war with another, both of them arguing for how all of creation should work. Whether or not the only things in life that matter are the things that live, and that to live is to suffer so ergo only that which cannot break should live, so you must break everything until only the absolute strongest shapes remain- or if it is possible for creativity and diversity and soft things to exist and create a life that is worth living in spite of the inevitable pain we all go through. That is so much more interesting then a bunch of dudes who are ultimately just mad about the fact that there's no easy to find and read manual for our purpose in life! It's such a basic, not to mention human motivation in comparison to what The Darkness had when it was a character in it's own right. And so...yeah.

[miqo-tales]

Jobs at 100 - CASTING

RDM

Dunno if I like Grand Impact. Feels awkward? It is pretty high potency though, so I just need to force myself to use it when it's up.

Manafication giving a free use instead of gauge is nice. Once again I'm confused that some jobs get that and some don't.

...not much else to say, really.

LVL100 AF thoughts: Very swashbuckler/pirate-y. The gloves are kinda boring and I'm not sure about the hat, but overall it's really nice.

************************************************

SMN

Third verse, same as the first.

So, it's been more than 10 years with Big Red, Big Yellow, and Big Green. It is long past time for the other three to show up.

So I really hope that by lvl 120 or something, SMN alternates between access to Ifrit/Titan/Garuda and Ramuh/Shiva/Leviathan.

So Bahamut, I/T/G, Phoenix, R/S/L, YugiOh Bahamut, I/T/G, and so on.

Alternatively, SMN could get something like PCT's Subtractive Palette that swaps Ruby, Topaz, and Emerald Arcanums for Amethyst, Diamond, and Sapphire Arcanums (or whatever gemstones might fit).

LVL100 AF thoughts: Looking back, SMN has had a weird mix of styles for AF. And none of them have really been any good, have they? Whereas this is another of the "wow it's an actual outfit" ones for this expansion. I mean it's just so startlingly practical; I wish every job got this look. I don't like the head piece that much though? It's the one thing in SMN AF that shouldn't be understated.

************************************************

PCT

Really don't like this job sub-60. Not having subtractive palette kinda sucks.

Can we all agree Hammer Stamp is the best thing ever? Yea whatever cute moogles, I just wanna go all Akane on mobs all the time with my interdimensional cartoon hammer.

As big as the AoE for Starry Muse is, you'd think I wouldn't have trouble staying inside it for 5 casts and yet, somehow...

The animations for this job are so good. As much as Viper is the poster-job for Dawntrail, I think Picto is arguably a better one. This job could not have been released before now. This job is your character having fun.

Also, yeesh, the damage this job can do sometimes, particularly in lower level content. "Hits like a truck" is not descriptive enough. This job reincarnates mobs to different worlds. Every time you kill something, a new light novel is created.

I dunno what this job's optimal rotation is, and I'm not sure I wanna go find out. I suspect playing it optimally will ruin it for me.

LVL100 AF thoughts: Kinda wish we'd gotten Relm's mantle/cape instead of the jacket, but not a big deal. In any case, it's cute and I like how it dyes. However, I gotta say, I'm not impressed with any of the in-game brushes.

************************************************

BLM

As I thought, the change to how you regain MP is a major bonus for me. I could never get a handle on the old way it worked.

I can actually play BLM now, which is nice. Though I'd only qualify as "okay" in most content, so not like I'm gonna use it a lot all of a sudden.

I wish the Thunder spells were genuinely oGCD (meaning they didn't reset all other ability timers). Also kinda wish Flare got upgraded to Despair instead of it being a separate ability.

3 polyglot charges is kinda disgusting.

The revamp to Manafont is pretty cool, but damn, the updates to Umbral Soul are maybe the best thing ever. Just straight up stopping the Enochian counter? Full umbral hearts outside of combat? Yes thank you.

Flare Star is pretty cool.

LVL100 AF thoughts: Like so many others, it's an actual outfit! Easily the best looking AF so far. It's not even close.

************************************************

[pastelwitchling]

If you’re still taking prompts can I please request anything involving Malex and Sanders..? Because Sanders is just the best and he’s so happy that Michael is happy! I feel like he and Alex would get along really well and team up to give Michael grief hahahaha this is a very vague prompt but there’s that Sanders gif set going around and it’s giving me all the feels 💛💛💛

***

When Alex got a knock at his door, he hadn’t expected to find none other than Sanders on the other side. He stilled, hand falling slowly off the doorknob. He didn’t know why he was shocked to see Sanders, but he thought he understood his own anxiety about being alone with the old man. This was, after all, as close to Michael’s father as anybody had ever been.

“Er, hello, sir,” Alex said at once.

Sanders raised a white brow and scoffed. “‘Sir.’ Boy, you really are military.”

“Ex,” Alex confirmed and stepped back. “Please, come in.”

“No, no, I, uh,” Sanders looked down at himself. “I just got back from the junkyard, I’m—I’m covered in grease—”

“Please,” Alex insisted, and his lips quirked into half a smile. “Unless you’ve forgotten, my husband’s a mechanic.”

Sanders looked down, away, and Alex understood how he could be uncomfortable. He himself didn’t really know how to react to a family member that wasn’t actively trying to kill him.

“Yeah, well,” Sanders cleared his throat, accepted Alex’s offer with a nod, and walked in past him. “I just realized I never gave you a wedding present,” he said when they got to the living room, and offered Alex the gift-wrapped box he’d been holding. “I know it ain’t much, but I think you could get some real use out of that.”

“Wow, thanks,” Alex said, albeit awkward himself. “You really didn’t have to.”

Sanders waved off his gratitude and gestured at the gift. “Go head, open it.”

So Alex did. It looked like a vase. With gears.

“Uh,” Sanders started, “it—it’s a—”

“Self-gardening mechanism,” Alex smiled. “Thank you, sir. I don’t have the green thumb Michael does, now I finally have a way to save the flowers he gets me.”

Sanders blinked, startled, and smirked. “You know your stuff, huh?”

“Michael loves everything to do with plants,” he shrugged. “I’m a quick study.”

He stared. “You really love ‘im, don’t you?”

“Always have,” Alex said. He looked down at his new gift, clearly made with a lot of care and detail. “I . . . I think I know why you’re really here too.” At Sanders’s confused look, Alex smiled sadly. “I know you probably don’t love the way I treated Michael at the beginning of our relationship. I . . . put him through a lot—”

“And he put you through a lot,” Sanders said, frowning. “Son, I ain’t heartless. I love that boy, and for the most part he’s a genius, but he can be a real dumbass when it comes to what means most to him. Which is why he talks back to me,” he said with a fatherly edge, then softened, “and hurts you so much.”

Alex started to shake his head. “H-He doesn’t—”

“Don’t you start now,” he heaved a sigh. “Where is the dumbass anyway?”

Alex couldn’t help but smile. Maybe it was because he knew Sanders meant it with an exasperated fondness. Maybe because Sanders was giving him permission to be angry and sad with the man he loved. Or maybe it was because no one had ever stood up for him and for it to come from Michael’s father felt like a kind pat on the head.

It’s okay to be upset, I’m giving you permission to be upset, he seemed to be saying.

“He’s getting some work done with Max and Isobel,” Alex said. “Something about Max’s work in Oasis.”

Sanders scowled. “And you’re not in on it?”

Alex fidgeted. “I, uh, overdid myself a bit at Deep Sky. I’m on Guerin’s version of a recommended house arrest. He’ll fill me in when he gets back.”

“Ah,” he nodded, “so you nearly worked yourself into a grave again, and Michael freaked out and forced you to rest, huh?”

“You’re pretty good at picking up on our dynamic, I see,” Alex tried for an amused smile, and went to set the vase on the kitchen counter.

Sanders said nothing as Alex busied himself with placing the sunflowers Michael had brought him just yesterday inside the new contraption. He watched as the gears turned and water filtered through from somewhere inside the vase. He smiled to himself. He’d seen every evil machine there was to see, he’d seen alien magic put to dark use. There was something refreshing about watching the workings of such a simple and good invention.

“You don’t owe anyone an apology, son,” Sanders said suddenly. His voice was softer than Alex knew it capable of being. “You ain’t your father and Michael knows that.” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Despite what the beginning of your relationship looked like. He loves you, and he don’t need you to hurt yourself to prove you love him back.”

Alex kept his eyes on the sunflowers for a moment longer, then he looked to the vase. Then he smiled over his shoulder at Sanders. “He’s really lucky to have you, Walt.”

Sanders blinked, then looked away. He cleared his throat again. “Yeah, well. Mm.”

With a pat to Alex’s shoulder, Sanders turned to leave. Alex didn’t move away from the kitchen counter even as he promised Sanders that they’d come over tomorrow night for dinner. He didn’t move even as he watched Sanders head out. If he had, if he’d been proud enough of himself or believed enough of what Sanders had told him to see him out, he might’ve seen Sanders pull out his phone. He might’ve seen him text Michael with a smirk at his lips. He might’ve realized how honest Sanders had been with him.

But he hadn’t. Instead, he stood there, only able to hope that he meant as much to Michael as Sanders made him out to. In that same moment, Michael checked a text he’d just gotten from his father.

You’re luckier than you know, kid.

And then maybe it wouldn’t have surprised Alex at all that Michael had smiled at the words, knowing exactly what Sanders meant.

***

Happy Malex Monday ❤

[thessalian]

Thess vs Plainsong, Again

One thing I do like about this game is that it does encourage you to go back to previously visited places, so you don't necessarily miss out on side quests. Not that I wouldn't have wound up back in that area anyway, but not necessarily Plainsong.

Right; Scalding Spear. Hi, Sokorra You want me to deliver a message to your brother? Sure; I could do with checking how things are in Plainsong anyway.

...A forest of green exclamation marks. So the answer to that is, "Not well". But let's check on Korreh first.

Hi, Korreh; your sister's gone to war again aaaaaaaaand... That's not what you're depressed about. Ah. You need a Longleg part. I feel you, fam.

Hey, Jaxx, any chance we-- Yeah, good, we're on this. And it helps a village too, because-- It looks purple and weird, right; HAEPHESTUS is being a dick again. Lemme just check on the rest of the mess in this area and I'll meet you there.

Okay ... new Chorus member-to-be went missing, presumed dead, and... Y'know, you Chorus guys are assholes. I will go look for her because I wouldn't put it past one of you to have seen to her disappearance. Because apparently even the largely peaceful vegan farmer types aren't above political fuckwittery.

So ... you guys are so desperate for food that you're willing to give up the whole vegan thing? ...Wow, you guys are way better about that kind of thing than the ones in the far past. But ... your hunters got into a mess. Lemme see what I can get from one of the survivors.

...Hi, Ven. Oof, that is some PTSD right there. Just ... take it easy and-- Oh for fuck's sake, HAEPHESTUS, chill the fuck out. Okay, I will deal with the Clawstrider.

Gonna go with the Clawstrider first, in point of fact, because you never know; Lao might not be as left-for-dead as you thought, Ven.

Oh, hey, another Utaru in my path. Not Lao, apparently, but ... in trouble. Lemme see if I can help.

...They're ... really focused on him. I wonder if--

Silent Strike one...

Silent Strike two. I rock.

Huh. I'm going to end up with my first adhesive weapon out of this, aren't I.

One ... two ... and three Skydrifters, one-shot kills from stealth. Woo!

Hi, Lao. Yes, I am hunting the-- Clawstrider, there we go.

"Don't fire until I do--" OMG YOU LET ME START FROM STEALTH THANK YOU.

Aaaaand that's a one-shot kill. So much for "don't fire until I do".

I love how the game just assumes I needed the adhesive. But it might come in handy, so thanks, Lao. Now go home. I'll bring the seed pouches back once I'm done with all the other errands.

Interesting processional path going on here. Aaaaaand ... yeah, we're leading up to murder mystery, aren't we.

I ... had been kind of half-hoping that we'd find Kalae penned in by machines, hurt, hiding ... but nope. Strangled to death by unidentified Utaru girl--

Whoooooooooo apparently got mauled by these assholes. Hi, Stalkers. Bye, Stalkers!

Right. All of the seed pouch delivery can wait. I'd rather not keep Jaxx waiting long than necessary, because he might get into trouble without me.

Yep. And it's fucking Leaplashers.

Okay. Let's go hunting a Longleg. Up the cliff we go.

Awwwwww. Isn't it nice that there are all these things that could crush these creatures for me? Shame I'm going to ignore them. POONK.

Right to the chest compression sac. Right to the damage dampener sac. Right to the damage dampener sac. And done.

Why, thank you, Jaxx. I am rather good with a bow if I do say so myself. You do right by the people of this village; I'll go back to Plainsong to deliver ... mixed news.

Here you go, Korreh.

.........Oooooooooh. Pretty.

Here you go, Shael. Seed pouches. Oldgrowth is ... as safe as it ever gets. I'll check in on Lao later; I've got a murder mystery to deal with.

Yes, Fane, I know your search party didn't find anything. Have you forgotten that "She Who Sees The Unseen" is one of my titles at this point? Look. Seed pouch of the killer. ...Kel's apprentice. I'm not surprised, honestly. Fane was at once too obvious and too ineffectual to be responsible for this. Over to Summerwind.

Ah. Had Kalae killed because you can't accept change, and poisoned yourself to spare your self change and consequences, huh? I guess this saves Bree from having to answer hate with hate.

Fane ... see what comes of being too rigid? The reed that bends in the wind survives the storm, asshole.

Okay, done with this. I will hit up a couple of metal flowers I missed and then go help out Talanah.

...Well, that's the idea anyway. Except that my neighbours are doing this big music thing which is about 90% evangelical stuff and 10% Bob Marley. It's loud enough that I can feel it in my chest, and I can't just close the windows because a) it's 26 degrees and b) ... again, I can feel it in my chest so I doubt that'll help. And now on top of everything else, I have a migraine. Do they have to have it this fucking loud?

...OMG THEY JUST TURNED THE VOLUME UP! This entire weekend is going to suck ass.