#and while i wait on some votes i'm going to attempt!! some writing!!

[ayakashiz]

Alien Stage R6 Analysis

VERY LONG compilation of my interpretations, impressions and unanswered questions about Round 6 of Alien Stage. I just wanted to write this to put all my thoughts in one place so I can finally rest (in pieces). TW for mentions of suic*de/suic*dal ideation.

The most debated is no doubt the kiss/choking scene and Ivan’s motivation for doing so in the first place. 

I think from the very beginning, even before R3, Ivan was planning to go out with a bang. That’s the immediate impression I got from the comic where he mocks/criticizes Sua for planning to “selfishly” die for Mizi and feel good being the “heroine” rather than having to deal with the trauma of being the one left behind. 

(I'm too lazy to edit the whole translation as of now, but might do so when I have more time.)

Ivan tells her how he’s “relieved that he’s not the only who’s that twisted” = He’s comparing himself to Sua. He thinks they’re both ‘twisted’ for planning to do the same thing, but from Ivan’s perspective, he at least isn’t fooling himself into thinking his motives are altruistic. He tasted the feeling of being ‘abandoned’, and he knows he doesn’t want to experience it twice. 

He also probably thought that his death wouldn’t be as impactful on Till as Sua’s death on Mizi, and therefore his own selfishness is more justified in his mind. This most likely plays a role in how cold and biting his words are towards Sua –he’s jealous of that difference between them.

I hadn’t noticed this detail the first time I watched the video: Not only did Till look absolutely miserable and defeated from the get go, but he completely gave up and stopped singing at some point. If you look at the video, we can hear the audio that was supposed to be sung, but Till is quiet and still, and THIS is the moment Ivan chooses to act.

Although they do not show the votes at that particular moment, stopping mid song would have definitely taken a hit to Till’s score as it’s basically forfeiting –a huge contrast to his previous match where he didn’t even let his opponent utter a single line.

In response, Ivan doesn’t just walk towards him but throws his microphone to the ground, explicitly forfeiting as well in order to then pull a drastic move like it was foreshadowed in his interview.

The kiss itself imo was the less calculated/arguably unplanned part. He could have just choked Till from the start and it would have gotten him the same if not better results (since it was the act of violence against another contestant that ultimately lowered his score and got the counter to stop). 

That kiss was authentic and for himself entirely, both as a last desperate attempt at conveying his feelings and a selfish way of leaving a strong impression on Till that he wouldn’t be able to forget (a hypocritical move going back to how he criticized Sua). In that sense, I don’t think Ivan was seriously trying to take Till down with him –although that’s up to interpretation. As I see it, that would contradict his actions up until that point.

Till was VERY CLEARLY suic*dal (once again, he gave up singing), and after the initial shock of Ivan squeezing his neck, this fiery, rebellious man who is KNOWN to fight tooth and nail, simply closed his eyes and relaxed his body, waiting for Ivan to end him without fighting at all. 

The thing is, no matter how suic*dal one may be, the fighting response when being actually suffocated is automatic and completely involuntary. People mention there not being marks on Till’s neck but I think the most telling sign is him not going red, not squirming, not struggling or holding onto Ivan’s wrists (again, expected involuntary responses), his eyes not watering or having blurry vision while we see Ivan from his POV, not opening his mouth even a little to gasp for air and not coughing or gasping either when he was finally released.

Ivan definitely had him in a strong grip, might have even made him a bit lightheaded, but the reason why Till could look so relaxed in the first place is because he had given up and was waiting for Ivan to go ahead. If his closed eyes and limp posture were due to the choking itself, he would have fallen or stumbled when being let go, but we see that his eyes open as soon as he feels Ivan’s hands slipping away and he looks shocked instead.

So then what was Ivan’s motivation, if not to kill him? Yes, there’s the already discussed plan to get himself disqualified. But Ivan glances at the screen only a few seconds after he starts the choking, confirming that the voting had in fact stopped with Till having the higher score. He then goes for one last ‘goodbye’ kiss before continuing to choke him, holding his grip even as he starts getting shot.

We see a closeup of him, his eyes and hands trembling, looking more frustrated/emotional than in Till’s first POV where he looks rather stoic. It makes me think that the reason he refused to let go was simply because he wanted Till to look at him. 

They strongly imply throughout the whole video that being annoying or mean or violent was the only way Ivan learnt how to make Till focus his full attention on him, but now even as he’s threatening his life, even as he himself is dying, even after that kiss, Till wouldn’t look. 

It took him getting fatally wounded and realizing there was no turning back to reach a state of acceptance. His bittersweet expression here reminds me A LOT of his smile after Till runs back during the meteor scene, although this one seems a lot more tender. He seems to accept the fact that Till will never love him back, but Ivan cannot stop loving him anyways and he at least got to put his feelings out there. 

(The parallels here are driving me insane. The way there is light in his eyes in both instances as he looks at Till even while 'losing him' in a way. The struggle between wanting to posses him yet realizing his free spirit/strong will is part of what he loves about him. That last genuine gaze from a character who spent his whole life putting on a mask. Yes I am very normal about this.)

Until then, Ivan’s more tender/vulnerable side is only shown while Till is unconscious or looking away.

(That soft, loving nuzzle to Till's face has me in SHAMBLES.)

But ironically, it’s only when he releases him and shows him this vulnerability without a mask that Till really looks at him for the first time. I’d go as far as to say that it was this moment, and not the kiss, that finally made Till understand Ivan’s feelings. And in turn Ivan gets that little shot of euphoria as he falls to the ground.

Going back to the survivor’s guilt… I can only imagine it’ll go completely downhill for Till from now on. Not only does he already think Mizi might be dead and is angry at himself that he couldn’t save her (as seen in the shot where he punches his own picture), but now he has most likely realized that Ivan intentionally fumbled their match for his sake –which would lead to the realization that he was the reason why Ivan chose to run back to Anakt Garden after him in the first place, and that choice ultimately lead to his death. 

Even though we see them fighting a lot as children through the videos and comics, it’s also implied that they were always together and they shared some quiet moments –the “Mizi didn’t play with you, I played with you” art, all that art of the main 4 playing together, those bright smiles as they ran away together during the meteor shower scene and Till looking so guilty when he let go of his hand. 

There are a few cute doodles of them for those who are on Patreon, and some more lore in the Anakt Garden kit –so they were at the very least friends in their own way (as best as 2 very traumatized and abused children could), constantly fighting and making up. Which God… it shows that despite appearances Till must have actually had the patience of a saint when they were little lmao.

But what I’m trying to say is that despite what Ivan may have thought, his death will most definitely have an impact on Till and the narrative going forward, and I’m excited to find out how that reflects in the final round (if the resistance doesn’t manage to get back up in time to disrupt it). 

Despite how much I adored (and SUFFERED WITH) this round, I still have MANY questions that were left unanswered, both about Ivan and Till, and the lore in general, and I wonder if there’ll be time to answer them all, as I can imagine the next MV will be focused on Luka’s perspective, the only one we haven’t been presented with.

One of the most pressing questions being: What’s the relationship between Ivan and that alien dog? Did he tame it? It is implied that it was Ivan who somehow led Till and Mizi to it in the first place in that one scene, and if so I wonder what his motivation was? Normally jealousy would be the first thing to come to mind but Ivan wasn’t interested in Till until AFTER he saw him stand up to the beast to protect Mizi, so it couldn’t have been that. 

This is something that was also teased on Patreon and I was looking forward to the explanation on the MV, but it never came, and now Ivan is dead, so the next video will most likely not be too concerned with his backstory any longer. (Which, also, I was really curious about his life in the slums before being captured, auctioned and brought to Anakt, as that would have played a huge role in his twisted personality/dark tendencies –once again teased on Patreon very briefly, but not explained beyond that frame of him looking famished.)

The second is, how is Ivan able to open Till’s collar/muzzle so easily? This is a question I’ve been having since R3, but chalked it up to Ivan being sneaky and figuring out some kind of code to the cell door and that somehow automatically deactivating the locks on the restraints… or something. But with how many times he does it in R6 with just a touch it’s very clear that that isn’t the case and also imo they’re trying to point this out as a significant detail. 

It may turn out that I’m just looking too much into it, but I find it really curious and interesting. Not only is he the only child without a collar (Mizi and Sua still had them despite being just as well behaved as him), but he seems to be the only one able to take them off –or at least Till’s. I’m pretty sure the children wouldn’t normally be able to remove them by themselves as it seems to be a control mechanism. So how can Ivan? This might explain a lot about how they were able to escape, and also add a layer of tragedy knowing that Ivan could have chosen to escape by himself at any point, but refused to leave Till behind.

Last but not least there’s all the human experimentation Till was subjected to, which was the main topic of the teaser and we see the same images show up in the very beginning of the MV. They help emphasize Till’s suffering and distressed state of mind, but then they’re never expanded on or mentioned at all for the rest of the video. That’s a huge piece of lore that I also hope isn’t forgotten.

I mean, I really doubt it will. So far VIVINOS & co. have been incredible with their ability to hold back information and release it at the moment where it’s the most impactful, which is refreshing to see. So I trust we’ll get some answers eventually. 

Really curious to know why they would experiment on an ALNST contestant in the first place, especially one that is undoubtedly talented and described as a musical genius (aka. has good odds of doing well on stage and earning the segyein revenue). A very plausible theory might just be that he was just getting constantly drugged to make him less of a threat/more submissive –like we see on the karaoke room scene. But it might as well be something bigger.

As for my expectations for the next round… I’m still just trying to process this one, as you can see by the sheer amount of text. There are many things left to address, and the Hyuna/Luka confrontation has been strongly teased. I wonder also, if the round goes on without interruption, what would Luka’s strategy against Till be? Would he go for provocation again, trying to imitate Mizi/hint to his recent trauma with Ivan? It probably won’t be that simple.

I mean, VIVINOS has been known for subverting our expectations with each round:

The ominous/callous framing that was given to Ivan by the end of Black Sorrow and the art that followed, making us suspicious of his intentions, only to have him die for love. The lifeless/doll-like framing given to Luka, vulnerable and cornered by flashing lights, only to have him be the cruelest/most calculating one (that we know so far). The rebellious, rowdy, willing to do anything to survive framing given to Till, only to have his fighting spirit completely break and willingly waiting to die by Ivan’s hands. The naive, complacent and passive image given to Mizi, only to have her snap, beat the shit out of Luka and join the rebellion –and with how things are going (and her being the protagonist) I wouldn’t be surprised if she, and not Hyuna (the one who was framed as the most strong and reliable, giving us a false sense of security going into R6), is who will have to try and rescue Till (and Luka???).

There are still a ton of things that keep me awake at night about R6 –my favorite character dying aside. I could talk about it forever, but I’ll leave it here. 

Feel free to share your theories, delusions, interpretations or any detail I might have missed with me. God knows we need group therapy after this as the cute chibi keychains can only heal us so far. Thanks for reading my rambles if you made it this far. :’)

[grahstumhurts]

1. Ignition

Cheerleader!Megan x Loser Band Member!Reader

a/n - n/n basically means nickname

Rekindling Masterlist

“Hey” Lara waves a hand over your face “You good? Zoned out for a good five minutes. Anything you wanna talk about?�� She questions the look on your face, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. Noticing the deepness in your thoughts in the way your face had scrunched up.

“I'm good, Dont worry about me.” You shrug her hand off your shoulder, standing up to put your guitar strap on. “What are we working on today?” All four of your band had gathered in Dani’s garage, which had become a tradition ever since forming your quartet. Meeting up every Tuesday and Thursday to work on music together, With Lara as vocals, Dani as bass, Yoonchae on drums and You on guitar and main songwriter. 

“We are voting on prom performance songs” Dani grins, “As the leader of our band, I say we should do either Still into you or Fender. if your done that is.”

“Either one works for me.” Yoonchae chimes in, quietly tuning her drum kit.

“I'm down to sing still into you” Lara shrugs and looks over at me expectantly. “What bout’ you? Still into you fits your vibes currently since you're still not over megan.” Dani slaps Laras arm, “Ow what its true!” She rubs her arm. 

“Fenders my vote, Dani?” you glance over at dani who is still glaring at Lara. “For the record I'm over her.” You go back to playing around with your pick, One that Megan had given you when you were kids. A pink hello kitty one with her worn out initials on the back. 

“You still using that pick says a lot, Yn” Dani scoffs “But i can ask if we do both? I’m sure Ms Grant wont mind us doing two” She shrugs, 

“Well some of the lyrics on fender need some reworking since i haven't finished it.” you add in, “I’m like, 80% done though. Shouldn't take too long” you glance into your notebook, the lyrics scribbled in, varieties of different coloured pens from when you had woken up and scribbled something down. You hand it over to Lara, who takes a quick read and nods. 

“This is probably some of your best work so far, Personally.” She smiles, “No offence to the other songs in this tragedy of a notebook”

“None taken, Some of those were horrid” You chuckle. “Lets work on still into you first though, I’ll finish up fender in the next couple of days.” You strum your guitar to check its tuning before turning on the amp. 

-

Wednesdays were always the worst. You shared one class with Megan and that was Psychology. On Wednesdays Psych was always first period, which means you had to see her with Greg. Greg is an asshole to say the least, He always teases Yoonchae, who's a sophomore while he's a Senior. Calling her a bunch of racist slurs and other things cause she's a transfer student from Korea, Not sure he realises Megan is also Asian. Pretty fucking ironic honestly. Greg always flirts with Megan any chance he gets. It's hard not to pay attention to his poor attempts at flirting with her when he's so bad at it. 

You sit in your regular spot waiting for Ms Ginberg, You open up your notebook and work on changing up some of the lyrics that didn't work. 

“Im hiding in the trunk im crossing my legs,” You mumble under your breath, “What's another word for crossing?” You rub your forehead as you repeat your question aloud.

“Pretzeling is a good word. If that's what you're looking for?” Megan stands by your desk, Close enough to notice the scent of oranges and persimmons, Her favourite fruits. “You write music now, That's pretty cool, N/n” She smiles at you, as if she hadn't been ignoring you for the past year.

“Thanks,” You avoid eye contact with her, scribbling down the word in place of crossing. “I'm hiding in the trunk, I'm pretzeling my legs. Sounds a lot better.” 

“Whats this song even about?” She questions you, looking into your notebook glancing around at the different lyrics. 

“Its nothing, just something i'm working on” You hastily close the book and shove it into your bag. “Since when do you care what i'm doing?” You scoff under your breath as Ms Ginberg walks in, Megan returns to her normal seat next to Greg with a slightly hurt expression.

-

Class goes as usual, Ms Ginberg teaches nothing, Greg flirts with Megan,Ms Ginberg assigns you way too much homework, and the list goes on. You gotta give it to Greg, he is persistent. Megan comes up behind you after class ends, Taps your shoulder to get your attention.

“Hey, Can we talk after school?” She asks, with a seemingly large amount of sincerity “I owe you an apology and an explanation.”

“What makes you care now?” You cross your arms over your chest and give her a disappointed look “You haven't seemed to care for two years, Megan.” It hurts to call her that when you’ve known her for all your life as Meg or Meimei. 

“Look, Just hear me out. You don't have to do anything afterwards, I'll leave you be. But just take a chance on me okay?” She pleads with you.

“Fine, I’ll meet you outside the gate and we’ll talk there.” You sigh deeply, “I’ve gotta go to my next class. I’ll see you around, Megan” You walk off, knocking your shoulders together as you push past her to your second class of the day. Lara ambushes you on your way to your shared ceramics class. 

“So, what's the deal with you and Megan anyway?” She gives you a knowing look “If you're not over her just say so, Saw you talking to her earlier.”

“She wanted to talk, I dunno what about but it seems important I guess.” You shrug “I’m not entirely sure if I'm totally over her now.” You sigh again and Lara rolls her eyes

“I knew it, Dude, seriously its not that embarrassing as you think.” She pushes your shoulder playfully “First girl crushes be like that for real.” she laughs after her last comment.

A/n EEEK SO HAPPY WITH HOW THIS FIRST CHAPTER CAME OUT WOOOWOWOOO

[caramel1mochi]

One Hazy Winter [Iso x F! Reader] [End]

[ Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 ]

Genre: Angst, fluff ‎ 

Words: 3k ‎ 

Synopsis: One winter before his disappearance, you told your boyfriend Yu about a question you’ve had for so long; one even he could hardly respond to. It took many more hopeless winters for you to finally have your answer.‎ 

Note: Please don't copy or steal my work and pass it off as your own! If you'd like to use one of my headcanons or something, I'd love it if you tagged or asked.

We're done with Iso!! As per the vote, I'm moving on to Yoru once everything's ready. And man is he as painful to write as I remember haha

‎

。+❤ฺ·。❤ฺ·。+❤ฺ· +❤·。❤ฺ·。+❤ฺ·

Spring, present day.

ㅤㅤ

It took you a long while to decide on whether that was one of the worst or best months of your life.

On one hand, you came back with a quarter of the harvest you were supposed to get, and you had to wait for a while until your lemon trees would bear fruit once more. That, and working with only thirteen lemons turned out to be much more difficult than you thought when it comes to baking.

And on the other hand, it was fun attempting to come up with workarounds with Ying. That, and you woke up the next morning with a new sensation that wrapped around you like a clingy lover. And it wasn't anything like the miserable pessimism you hauled around, or like the apathy that…

No, no. It was apathy. 

But a more positive kind of apathy. One that beckoned you to come to terms with many dilemmas in your mind. One of them being that winter was just... winter. A season. And like every other season, it had its ups and downs. It wasn't some omnipresent being out to get you, or whatever.

And quite frankly, this apathy was the best feeling you've ever had in a long... well, in your entire life. You woke up looking forward to the day, with a desire to actually get things going.

And that's exactly what you did.

You spent the past three months selling those plants back in your apartment at that nursery, you made friends with that lady who recommended you do such a thing, and now you were back at Yu’s house to check in on your growing orange trees. Heck, Yu’s neighbours even started greeting you whenever you came by.

They definitely saw you carrying the baskets of fruit and wanted some. Maybe you should use this wealthy neighbourhood to your advantage, you mused.

ㅤ

Ying called you earlier and mentioned discussing the state of her café with you since she had ‘more important matters to get to’. And you didn’t really mind, despite still being a mere barista, but she said she’d discuss the details by afternoon… But the location? Yeah, she promised she’d get back to you on that after she’d decided.

You moved down the short corridor, your eyes taking a moment to adjust to the strong rays that poured through the windows of the doors. The darkness around you did not help ease the pain of such a bright light. But even then, you wrapped your free hand around the handle and forced the door open, allowing the brightness to finally balance itself out.

You noticed something yellow out of the corner of your eye. And you would’ve dismissed it if you hadn’t turned to look at what it was. It was… inside the basket. There was one Meyer lemon, probably from that harvest months ago that the two of you missed. It kind of made sense that you’d forget it. You haven’t really visited this house after that day, not with the ongoing streak of snowstorms. And, you know, Ying’s persistence on keeping you safe.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the buzzing of a nearby mosquito. And immediately, you dropped the watering can and crushed the bug, instantly killing it. Now that you considered it, the one good thing about winter was the lack of annoying insects. That, and the fact it helped plants rejuvenate after a harvest, and that it kept earth’s temperature in check, and… 

No, nevermind. You didn’t want to be warming up to winter. Pun intended.

You moved back towards your growing orange trees and observed their shape for a moment. And like the row of lemon trees right behind them, they looked as otherworldly as they were. The white flowers on it looked even prettier under the sunlight’s strong glare. Much prettier than in the winter, but they both had their charm. Super photogenic.

Just as you grabbed the watering can up from the ground, your phone vibrated with an embarrassingly loud ringtone, and you pulled it out of your pocket only to discover that Ying was calling. At the worst time as well, you thought as you answered and held up the device to your ear.

ㅤ

"Hi."

ㅤ

"Y/N, I've decided!"

ㅤ

Her voice took you by surprise more than the ensemble of loud chirping birds around you.

ㅤ

"Decided?"

ㅤ

"We're going to meet up on the bridge. Do you remember it?"

ㅤ

You kept the phone held up against your ear with your shoulder, grabbing one branch and gently pushing it aside so that the water from your can could reach every crevice of the tree.

ㅤ

"The bridge...?"

ㅤ

"Yes! I was told it looks ethereal in the spring, and it truly does! Ah, and it's closer to the train station than I thought. We can use it as a landmark for when we leave. What do you think?"

ㅤ

You continued watering in silence for a moment. It looks ethereal in the spring? Who the heck told her that?

Whatever, it wasn’t your job to question everything.

ㅤ

"That can work. When do I come by?"

ㅤ

"Actually, I'm already here."

ㅤ

You immediately stopped watering.

ㅤ

"Already? Ying, the least you could've done was give me a heads up."

ㅤ

“I’m sorry, but I have something scheduled for sundown! I’ll see you there, okay? I promise you, it’ll be worth it!”

ㅤ

She closed the call before you could retort.

She was probably going to promote you or straight up just hand you the café. What with how busy she was starting to get and how much she disappeared, it wouldn’t surprise you if it turned out to be actually that. You didn’t really mind taking control of the café, now that you thought about it… Oh, but the idea of dealing with your co-workers’ minute problems sounded like pure torture.

You sighed and continued watering your plants in silence, quickening your pace so that you’d be able to make it to her in time.

ㅤ

ㅤ

It took you a while, but eventually, you made it. And the only guidance you used was the pitter patter of the children’s feet as they ran around and cackled, alongside the melodic chirping of the birds. The bus left a trail of smoke as it sped off, but this one mild inconvenience was immediately drowned out by the sight before you.

Ying was right, the place looked like paradise on Earth now that it was spring.

The waters were crystal clear, the trees were full of life and the grass on the ground vibrated with an enigmatic amount of cheerfulness. Almost like they were harmoniously swaying to a tune you couldn’t hear. Had someone taken a picture of this place, you would’ve convinced yourself it was just editing and that there was no way Earth would look like this.

But it did, you mused as you approached the bridge.

It didn’t take long for you to arrive at a comfortable spot and rest your arms on the warm railing. Thankfully, despite your short height, the railings weren’t too tall and your loose clothes allowed you maximum flexibility to peer through to catch a glimpse of the waters. Short enough for you to be able to comfortably lean on it, but not so short children could fall down.

Your eyes were firmly fixated on the lake. And for the first time in so long, you felt... content.

You still didn't know what your goal in life was. You still didn't know why you should keep going, among many other questions like that. But all you knew was that the path your life headed in... Well, you didn’t want to change anything about it.

What would tomorrow look like? You pondered with a fond smile, holding up the Meyer lemon just above the lake and allowing the sun's light to shine in on it. And it beamed. It beamed with celestial beauty unfathomable to the human mind. 

This was your harvest.

You put down the lemon with an even wider smile and stared at the lake instead, the fish that swam by. Tomorrow sounded amazing, now that you thought about it.

And you looked forward to it.

ㅤ

"Y/N?"

ㅤ

A soft voice promptly came up from behind you. You sighed and stuffed the lemon back into your pockets, before turning around to meet her gaze.

ㅤ

"What took you so long? I thought you were in a hurry–"

ㅤ

The moment you locked gazes with a familiar pair of lilac eyes, your breathing hitched, and time stood still. 

It took a moment to comprehend that this person wasn’t Ying. It wasn’t Ying at all. It was… You felt your heart drop as you rapidly looked the figure up and down.

Broad shoulders, purple eyes, black hair, tall stature…

It was Yu. He stood only a few feet away from you; and he donned a meticulously designed hoodie with collars tall enough to conceal the lower portion of his face. One you had never seen before.

The words were lodged in your throat. Scratch that, no, your mind went completely blank, and the world felt like it started breaking apart.

ㅤ

“Yu…”

ㅤ

"Y/N, I..." He took a step forward, the floorboards audibly creaking under his weight. "I'm so sorry."

ㅤ

His voice had a sombre undertone. Slight and drowned out by the mirth that surrounded the both of you, but it was still telling. It was one that successfully let you know that he drowned in regret, all without saying a single word.

And yet, you still weren't sure how to feel about this. Sad? Happy? Furious? The second option was the most obvious one in your mind, but for the love of God, you just couldn’t form a single thought in your head. Heck, you couldn’t even comprehend the situation in general. All you knew was that Yu was here. And that was… No, wrong wasn’t the word.

His hand gently clasped your shoulder, and a familiar warmth landed alongside it.

ㅤ

"I'm sorry it took so long, but I- I was caught up in so many things, and it all just..."

ㅤ

He then pulled you into a hug. Your cheek slammed against his chest, the impact only cushioned by his thick hoodie.

ㅤ

"I missed you."

ㅤ

You didn't react.

For a few seconds, you stood there with a stiff posture as you stared into space, unsure whether you should return the hug or just stay silent and not do anything. This whole situation felt unreal. It felt like one of those hyper realistic dreams your brain would conjure up whenever it decided it wanted to escape your pitiful life, but that sprinkle of hope always scattered the moment you woke up. But it wasn't. In fact, he stood right there, the familiar scent of lemons taking over your nostrils on account of how close he was.

Yu was here… He was present. He came back.

Though you shut your eyes as hard as you could, tears still formed against your will, and they were quick to stream down your cheeks.

ㅤ

"Where..." you started, "Where were you...?"

ㅤ

You weakly pulled away, but Yu still kept you in his grip. And you immediately took this chance to observe him all over again despite your incredibly blurry vision. It was as if those years had never passed given his features. He still had that same enchanting face, and those pretty lilac eyes that always tore away at your stress with just one glance.

ㅤ

"After all this time..."

ㅤ

You held his cheek and caressed it. His pale skin yielded under your touch, and the palm of your hand outlined the sharp structure of his jaw. The softness of his skin, the flicker of vulnerability in his eyes juxtaposed to his stony expression… All of it was all so familiar.

ㅤ

"Why did you leave me, Yu?"

ㅤ

"I'm– I'm sorry, Y/N. It wasn't my choice. If I could take it all back, I would–"

ㅤ

"Why did you leave me?!"

ㅤ

You burst into tears and clutched his hoodie, burying your head in his chest.

ㅤ

"I thought you were dead! I– I thought that– I thought... I thought I lost you...!"

ㅤ

Out of pure instinct, Yu was quick to bring you closer and tightly hold you in his arms.

ㅤ

"I'm here, I'm here, okay? Nobody's dead."

ㅤ

"I thought you died, Yu! I thought you were dead, I– thought you were..."

ㅤ

Your sobs and nonsensical babbles continued. It was all the same repetitive questions about his well being, and more specifically, how you thought he was dead. Each sentence you managed to complete felt like another blade plunging his heart, only further drowning him in guilt.

And unfortunately for him, the only thing Yu knew to do in this situation was hold you and gently caress your back.

ㅤ

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I– I should've explained it all from the beginning. But I... didn't want to lose you if I ever did."

ㅤ

He knew how stupidly soft you made him. How he'd stutter when speaking to you, and how wide his smile had gotten when you two first hugged, your arms squishing his thick white hoodie just to reach his form. The same hoodie he spent hours washing blood off of the night before.

Maybe he should've told you.

ㅤ

"I thought you were dead, I– I thought... that gun, you–"

ㅤ

Though you followed these loosely strung sentences with a curse, one specific word successfully pierced his bubble.

ㅤ

"Gun? What gun?"

ㅤ

This question seemed to bring you back as well. You pulled away, and just the sight of your red cheeks and shimmering eyes, aching with raw emotion, all of it was enough for him to understand how much this impacted you.

ㅤ

"I saw that gun. N– next to that medallion." You furrowed your brow, the sun sharply highlighting your tear-stricken face. "Is that it? Are you in a gang, Yu? Is that what you couldn't tell me?!"

ㅤ

"No! I– I wasn't in a gang, Y/N. It's..."

ㅤ

Yu's gaze fell. Unintentionally, he instead eyed your trembling hands.

He couldn’t hide this anymore, could he?

ㅤ

"I– I'm... Look, as unbelievable as this sounds, I– I was a… I was a hitman."

ㅤ

"...You were what? A hitman?!"

ㅤ

"Yeah. I… That’s the truth."

ㅤ

You narrowed your eyes. It really was unbelievable. How could someone like him be capable of killing someone? No, not someone, but people? And for a job?! You would’ve labelled him a liar if it weren’t for that blasted gun.

Then, a name popped up in your mind, one that seemed to support this idea.

ㅤ

"Iso...?"

ㅤ

He went blank for a moment.

ㅤ

"...That's, uh, no, that's a code name. I switched to a profession less... suffocating. That's what they call me now."

ㅤ

"Ying was in on this?"

ㅤ

Yu's face blanched. But quickly, he held your hand and firmly kept it in your grip.

ㅤ

"She was my only way of knowing you were alive! There wasn't any– Y/N, look, none of this should've happened, I know I should've been honest from the beginning, but I didn't want you to leave if I ever told you!” His eyes darted elsewhere. “Ying wasn’t happy when she found out, but I–"

ㅤ

"I’m not like her! I never would've gone anywhere! You could've been the devil and I still would've stayed because I wouldn’t have kept going if you weren’t there!” You furrowed your brow. ”But that's not the case anymore. I still love you, but I know what I deserve, Yu. I know I deserve a relationship that isn't... one-sided..."

ㅤ

You suddenly choked on your words. Yet, he was quick to respond when he could.

ㅤ

"But we can have that, Y/N! We can start anew, no more secrets. Nothing between us, okay? Nothing but the truth. Just, please..." he squeezed your trembling hand, "give me one more chance. I promise I'll make you the happiest woman on Earth."

ㅤ

Tears began to flow once more, tracing the same path as the ones that had dried out mere seconds ago.

For a moment, your eyes slammed shut, and you used this pause to both catch your breath and comprehend the situation. It was hard to make a decision. Sure, you were unbelievably mad at everything. At Ying, at Yu, at the world, and especially those people who held Yu hostage, if his words were to be believed.

But, Hitman…? It sounded so unbelievable. Yu was just way too kind and pacifistic to commit murder. It sounded impossible.

Almost mechanically, You rested your head on his chest, lying limp as he wrapped his arms around you. The lack of aversion on your side registered as permission for him to hold you. Not that he still didn't remain incredibly cautious.

ㅤ

"Happiest woman on Earth..." 

ㅤ

You muttered ponderously to yourself. You were already happy. But you knew you’d be happier with him. Even after everything that happened, you missed having him by your side again. You missed his curious little questions about things you considered mundane, and that endearing look of realisation as you explained it to him…

Then, a smile lifted your lips.

ㅤ

"I missed you, Yu." You hugged him back. "From now on, you’ll be honest with me. About everything."

ㅤ

Being this close to him, you felt the jump in his palpitations as he registered these words.

ㅤ

"I will! I will. I promise."

ㅤ

You closed your eyes, allowing the familiar scent of lemons to enter your nostrils and put your mind at ease once more. The two of you stayed like this for a second. It felt like this embrace’s sole purpose was to make up for how much you two missed each other. Of course, he knew he would’ve lost a bit of his sanity had he not known about your whereabouts, but he also knew that saying that probably… Maybe it’s best to keep quiet. Thank God for Ying’s updates…

Then, his eyes shot open at the mention of the healer.

ㅤ

“Hey, let’s go home. I have so much to tell you.”

ㅤ

You pulled away and wiped your cheek once more, noticing the eagerness etched on his features. You nodded.

ㅤ

“I’d like that.”

ㅤ

With that, he held your hand and helped you stand up, and the two of you began walking away from the bridge. His thumb promptly began tracing the lines on your palm all on its own. And of course, you couldn’t help but wistfully smile at this familiar

Despite everything, you couldn’t truly hate this man, no matter how much you knew you had to. You just wanted to know how this gentle giant was supposedly a hitman.

You rested your head on his shoulder as you moved.

[bigfan-fanfic]

Writing Game 1.1: Simple

Prompt: Picnic Pairing: Bruce Wayne/Clark Kent

Thank you to the 87 wonderful freaks who voted on my lil poll! I hope you enjoy the first of nine little short fics for this first round!

"Y'know, traditionally, picnics don't involve so much... silver." Clark chuckles, gesturing at the chilled silver tureen of fruit, the mahogany charcuterie board, and the few cloche-covered platters of sandwiches, profiteroles, and chocolate covered strawberries laid out as they take a picnic in the gardens on the grounds of Wayne Manor.

Bruce gives a smirk, his dark blue eyes twinkling. He leans across Clark, enjoying the way the farmboy blushes as he glances down where Bruce's shirt creases at the open button. "That so? I wasn't aware you were a picnic aficionado."

"Oh, hush." Clark chuckles, pushing ever so gently against Bruce's chest to move him back to his side of the plush red patterned carpet laid down beneath them in the garden - probably some material like cashmere.

"Truthfully, I... may have gone a bit overboard." Bruce admitted. "Despite my extensive training, I am... rusty with my culinary skills."

"Wait, you're telling me part of your Batman training was cooking?"

Bruce levels an unamused look at the astonished Kansan.

"Sorry. Carry on."

"I just... sometimes I can go overboard when it comes to extravagance, to cover up the inadequacy I feel at the basic level."

"You're charming enough at parties." Clark muses, observing Bruce, watching him make a conscious attempt to remain open in his body language, to defy the instinct telling him to conceal his emotions. It was adorable how hard he had to try to be vulnerable.

"It's easier when I'm playing a role. When I'm Bruce Wayne, the socialite, the Prince of Gotham, it's no different than playing the role of Matches Malone, or any other aliases. I can throw myself into the character. When I'm stripped of pretense... I'm woefully incomplete."

"Well, that's just not true."

Bruce rolls his eyes. "You really think that? My deficiencies in simply making a meal for myself without Alfred's aid, my failures as a parent and mentor, my lack of skill in basic socialization-"

"When you make yourself into a checklist, you're bound to leave some stuff out. You look at yourself with such a critical eye, you're bound to see all the flaws before the good. If nothing else, that just goes to show how self aware you are." Clark smiles, gently plucking a chilled square of watermelon.

"Leave it to you to turn my self-pitying musings into a complement."

Clark smiles, using a black cloth napkin monogrammed with a gold W to catch the juices of the fruit running down his chin. "Pa always used to try and freak me out. He said if you swallow a black watermelon seed, you'd grow a watermelon in your stomach."

Bruce raises an eyebrow. "I haven't heard about that."

"It's not true. In fact, it's not even anecdotally true; nothing will happen, they're not even slightly toxic, like apple seeds. It's just some random thing we used to say or believe. Like that you shouldn't swim right after eating."

Bruce doesn't talk about his parents. Just as a general rule. And he doesn't now, even though he can probably tell that Clark is wondering if Bruce's dad would've told him these silly little lies, or any of the other countless common parental platitudes. Clark is a deeply empathetic person, and it hurts him to imagine that Bruce never got to be with his parents. It's not even the same kind of situation as him with Jor-El and Lara, who are still somewhat strangers to him - he still had parents. Still had Ma and Pa. And Bruce had Alfred, but it couldn't be the same.

Clark looks at him and instead says, "Can I have a hug?"

And Bruce looks startled, but obliges him. Gracefully, fluidly rises and practically straddles Clark, embracing him. Clark sighs happily and leans back until he's lying down, Bruce on top of him, pulled into an inadvertent kiss.

They kiss for a while, then lie together looking straight up, watching the clouds drift by in the sunlight. A brilliant day, not even just by Gotham standards. Bruce still isn't sure that Clark didn't fly up there before the picnic to ensure the perfect weather.

"I don't mind how extravagant you are. I think it's just how you show love. And besides, I know you don't really mind how plain I am."

"I envy it. I wish I could be simpler, I just... don't know how."

"I don't need you simple, silly. I just need you."

"That's exactly the kind of sugary sweetness I expect from you."

"Why, I do believe I'm growing on ya, Mister Wayne."

Bruce looks at him. Clark looks back. He can see Bruce steeling himself, preparing. And he lets out a very, almost comically, serious...

"I love you."

Clark allows himself one second of pure shock, realizing just how much it took from Bruce to say that, finally.

"I love you too."

Bruce's hand finds its way into Clark's, and they stare into the sky until the sun starts to set and the honeybees start coming for the fruit left uneaten.

Some things, it seems, truly are that simple.

[pabtsblueliving]

Hot Summer Georgia Nights

Really wanted to write this from the poll ( it had the most votes ) even though i left voting up for a few hours LOLLL

Here’s how you and Daryl met :) Enjoy <3 xoxo

warnings: mention of abuse, cigarette smoking, and slightest mention of drugs/alcohol.

pabtsblueliving © 2023

Your sitting in the hot sun on the porch with Judith, sun beating down and the summer bugs chirping reminded you of those times that felt almost like yesterday.

You had known the Dixon brothers from the oldest boys endeavors; drugs, drinking, girls, and trucks. You never knew him well though, You had grown up a few homes down from them, and you were the same age as the youngest, Daryl. 

You were in a lot of the same classes as Daryl in high school. He was quiet, reserved, has a few friends but never made himself too known. You often took walks around your neighborhood when the heat was too much to bear in your home, often walking by the Dixon residence…sneaking a peak at Daryl, crouched down next to a motorcycle with a cut-off button up shirt.

Not to his knowledge, at least then, you had always had a thing for him. His eyes, his spikey unruly hair, his muscles, his voice. Everything, You’d just been afraid of rejection.

There was a particularly sticky day, and luckily there was a public pool open during the summer a few blocks away from your home. You and some friends had to head over to beat the heat.

You were perched on a towel, feeling parched. Your two girlfriends face down, attempting to gain a sunkissed tan while sitting by the side of the pool. 

“I'm gonna go grab a soda, you guys want?” You asked, putting your sunglasses on top of your head.

They both smiled and declined, thanking you. You adjusted your suit and made way to the snack bar. You were waiting in line when you saw him. Daryl. He was with his two other friends, heading your way. You looked over, then went back to paying for your soda.

You turned around to walk back to your friends when your and Daryls’ shoulders knocked together, your soda flying out of your hand. You sighed and knelt down and he turned around quickly. 

“Sorr’ bout’ that…” He spoke quietly, he scratched the back of his head.

“No…I…Didnt see where I was going.” You said, a rose color spreading across your cheeks.

He looked towards his friends, they shook their heads and had a questionable look. Daryl looked towards you as you picked up your cup.

“Le’ me just…get you nother’ one. I owe you…” He dug his hands into the pockets of his swim trunks, pulling out a few dollar bills.

“Wait, no its ok seriously…I didnt wan-” He cut you off, handing you a new soda. 

“I don’ mind” He gave you a small smile. You returned it.

“Thanks” You blinked and he continued on to his friends, and you did to yours.

A few hours later, you were on your porch, smoking a cigarette. You heard crashing and yelling a few houses down, you tried to look, but didnt feel like moving from your spot. 

“...Yeah, and screw you asshole!” You heard a familiar voice yell, and then a door slam. 

Your eyebrows furrowed, and you took another drag turning your head, then you saw him under the street lights,

He gruffed and rubbed his eyes, then feeling your presence. He turned to you and walked over,

“Hey, could’ I git on’ of those?” He mumbled

“Yeah, sure” You gave him a smile and met him at the broken gate of your front yard.

You handed it to him, and gave him a light.

“Wait…I kno’ you.” He looked at you.

“You made me drop my soda” You chuckled

He shook his head and sighed, “Damn, yeh. Sorry bout’ that…” He blushed a bit and took another drag.

“Do you…” You pointed to your porch, “wanna sit?” You asked, this was a long shot. 

He looked over to his house, then back to you, and looked down. He rocked on his feet. On the inside you screamed at him to say yes.

“Beats goin’ back there.” He mumbled. You smiled and opened the gate, letting him in. He sat on the steps.

You both sat, and smoked in silence before you spoke up.

“Ive seen you around, youre Merles brother right?” You asked

“Jesus, unfortunately…” He said, chucking his cigarette. “But uh…yeah, youre in my history class, I seen you too.” He said

“So you do recognize me…not just cause you spilled my soda…” You smirked a bit, and lit another cigarette, handing it to him.

“Yeah I guess, whatever.” He scoffed, and smiled a bit…

Present Day: Alexandria

“...Y/N…Y/N!” Daryl snapped his fingers.

You shook your head, “what?” you asked looking up at him, judith playing with a set of cars next to you.

“You here? You looked like you were on another planet.” He stated, taking a seat next to you.

“Yup, just…reminsiting.” You smiled, and Daryl gave you a sweet smile and gave you a kiss on the head.

“What? The heat reminding you of those hot summer georgia nights?” He raised an eyebrow. 

You looked at him, and gave him a kiss.

“Exactly.” You smiled.

[agirlandherquill]

Written In Smoke - The Letter Stained In Ink

this week's letter comes to you fresh off the high of finishing reading a book, which i'll be sure to ramble about a little later on so bear with me, a few things have happened this week so here goes!

A Glimpse Through Time - little bits about me and what I’ve been up to this week

the past few days at least have been a lot, a good lot don't get me wrong, but a lot, now here's what I've been up to

A great chunk of my Saturday afternoon comprised of watching F1 (slipping in another fact about me, i'm a big fan), watching the practice, then an F2 sprint and then the F1 Qualifying for the big race - and i'm so freaking happy because my two favourite drivers are in the top 3 positions for tomorrow (you can tell this is written mere minutes after watching the madness) - it's also pretty cool because the track for the UK's race isn't all that far from me, and I'm hoping to grab tickets for next season

While I was watching the incredible chaos of F1, I was also reading, bit more on that below, but the universe must love me because the race finished the same moment that I read the final sentence of my book - talk about timing

I BOOKED MY TRIP TO BATH - I'm so so excited to go and see the Jane Austen Centre and Mary Shelley's House of Frankenstein, issue is I have just over a week to read 4 more Jane Austen books (I've only read persuasion and pride and prejudice, both twice) and Frankenstein (this is my motivation to finally read it haha), but it'll be doable for sure

This absolute genius was 3 hours late (cough, attempting to renew at 2am, cough) returning library books, but the people at the library were so sweet and got rid of the 15p charge and renewed them for me instead - first, and hopefully only time I'm late with library books fingers crossed

Books - This week's been a bit more productive writing-wise, so I only had time to read one book this week, and I finished it today (saturday, incase I take too long to write the rest of this week's entry and send it off tomorrow instead, and let's be honest, it's likely) - You, by Caroline Kepnes, and I've seen the show many, many times, and the book was just as addictive, I'm thinking of reading the rest but that might be a plan for the future since my bookshelves and kindle library are begging me to read the books i own and have yet to read rather than buying more - I did however grab a copy of P.S I Love You in a charity shop and I can't believe it, it literally looks NEW, so I'm going to look forward to reading and watching the movie at some point - I'm also halfway through Love, Theoretically and I am OBSESSED, that and Love Hypothesis were the only books I was planning on reading by the author but now I'm not so sure, they're so GOOD

Shows/Movies - My. Lady. Jane. SPEECHLESS (as of writing this I'm only on episode 5, but I'm hoping to finish it this weekend) and I can't wait to devour the book when the tie-in edition comes out (this is one I NEED in paperback, sorry bookshelves), I also watched Empire Strikes Back this week and can I just say I'm more of a Leia and Han fan than I expected to be - they're so good

Music - us. by Gracie Abrams (this is one of very few of her songs that I know but it is so good to write with, on loop, or it was for the scene I was writing, but that's just what it's like being a writer I suppose, music changes with each scene and some songs fit better than most), Chlorine by TOP - my friends introduced me to them and this is probably my favourite song of theirs, and that's it for this little segment they're the two main songs I can think of

oh and I can include a slightly major adulting achievement - I voted for the first time this week, it was a strange, strange feeling but it happened - I'm not big on politics, not at all, so I won't say too much about it but the thought of crossing a box to decide a country's future is really funny to me, I could not tell you why, but it makes me laugh

Spills From The Ink-Pot - writing, writing, and more writing

this is England, it may be July but the skies sure do know how to pour - which means more time indoors for me writing (I do love writing outside, when it's not too cold, but the rain's brought a little bit of an anti-summer chill, shocker, so this week's been more of an indoors-y one for me)

The current draft of Ruin's Reprisal took a bit of a hammering, as did my keyboard - in the last 3 days alone I've written 6,000 (ish) words, which is a lot for me recently, and it's only going to be more still throughout the rest of this weekend - people ask me why I have a keyboard cover on my laptop, this is why, I hate the thought of wearing down the keys and leaving fingerprints on my screen when I shut my laptop- and with a keyboard cover none of that happens, and my keyboard survives just a little longer (pray for the poor thing, I know I am) - at the time of almost publishing this letter I'm now sitting at 12,000 words written by the end of the weekend (whoops)

Current Word Count is sitting at 212,525, but that's with me having edited up to halfway through Part Two, it's by no means a set number given the amount of chapters I still have to go through, but it's progress (and i love progress)

I'm thinking of making a checklist in these letters to encourage myself to do more writing things in the next week, so here's next week's goals:

Come up with Part Titles - I have Chapter ones, why not for Parts too?

I want to finish Part Two by next week - that's 5 chapters away, possibly doable?

Slightly bigger goal than just next week - I want to write a short story, or a story, maybe not so short, but I want to write start to finish over the summer (maybe it'll be a novella?), it's a challenge I'm setting for myself alongside writing Ruin's Reprisal, and it starts with the little snippet I released earlier this week - writing on a clueless whim becomes an actual, surprisingly good thing, who knew?

I have plenty to show you this time around dear reader, so here's a few snippets for you to sink your teeth into:

She grabbed his hand and pressed it over her bleeding thigh. “Do it. Heal me.” Fenley frowned. “Edeva-” “There’s no time. They’ll find us. I need you to do it.” His brows furrowed, he watched her carefully. “You’ll reject it, won’t you?” He’s figured it out, or he thinks he has. Either way, it doesn’t matter. “This Exilza will survive.” Fenley’s jaw tightened. “I’ll hurt you.” His eyes swept up from her leg to her face. She caught his stare, and she held it. “Then hurt me. I know you’ll make it right.” “…But I can’t.” She watched his throat bob up and down. He’s not willing to hurt me more before he heals me. Her fingers twitched by her sides. It’s going to take drastic measures to make him do it.  She reached up and slung her arm over his shoulders, drawing him in close, Fenley grunted in shock, she used his distraction to grab one of the knives from his coat, he jerked back, his mouth hanging open as she buried the blade in her thigh, close to her wound, and buried her face in his chest to muffle a cry of pain. She breathed deeply and braced herself to rip out his knife. She pressed it into his hands.  “Until I bleed out, my life is yours. Decide.”

This was not hunting, this was not defence, this was murder through and through.  Edeva had taken a life, and now the epithet hanging over her name was true. I am a murderer. Vanquisher. Slaughterer. Monster. She sank to her knees, clutching her head, as the names began to swirl, over and over until they blurred, becoming a perpetual scream in her mind, she could think, still she could not breathe, she could not move. The ground shook, the Oksa were coming for her. She did not look, she did not lift her chin from her chest, she remained still on her knees, succumbing to her fate, her punishment for what she had done. I deserve it. I took a life of theirs and they’ll take this life of mine. The darkness crept in, it took over her, numbing the world until all she could see was the dark, shrouding her like a cloak. Her heart stuttered in her chest. This was not death, this was Shael. “Edeva.” Fenley’s whisper forced her to lift her head. He was on his knees too, one hand on her shoulder. “What are you doing?” “Accepting.” She hadn’t the strength to say more, or the strength to look him in the eye, but he stopped her, he made her, his fingers grasped the hair at the nape of her neck and pulled back sharply enough to force her to meet his gaze. “There is nothing to accept and I will not see you give up, I will not see you submit, not to them. I will not stand around watch your neck break - I won’t,” His jaw clenched. “I won’t, and you won’t either.” The hand on her shoulder pushed roughly and she fell, she fell from the ethereal cloak of Shael and back to the world, back to the fighting. Where Oksa had been there were now smoking remains, such smoke wasn’t normal, and she realised it wasn’t. It was shadow. Whatever Fenley had done she was glad she hadn’t seen it, but he had done it to help her, to save her, to help her save herself - for just a little longer.  Something glinted to her right, it was her sword, sticking out of the dirt. Fenley. He wants me to fight. He wanted her to do the impossible. “I can’t.” She closed her eyes, her fingers curling in on themselves as her hand hung limply by her side. Vitaires do not fall. We stand. We stay standing.  Her Mama’s words had never been so loud in her mind. They were true, they were everything she needed, much like Fenley’s push. I am Edeva Vitarie and I will stand. She took her first breath, then another, I. Will. Stand.

and this next snippet comes from the short story i'm writing (alas yet to be given a title): “It isn’t very often someone gets away with saying no to me.” She startled at his voice. She turned to see him squatting atop a large bin, crammed against a wall, overflowing with rubbish, none of it seemed to bother him as he prowled over its lid and crept down to her level. Her fingers stilled against her laces. “Have I?” “Not quite.” “I should warn you I’m expected somewhere.” “This won’t take long, I came only to give you this.” She flinched at an envelope hitting her lap, she hadn’t felt him move, let alone seen it.  “If I open it, will it kill me?” “That envelope contains ink and paper, nothing more.” “Nothing less, either.” She mused, slipping the envelope into her coat. “Your stationery is what most would die for.” “Really? I thought I was using the cheaper stuff.” “Rich, are we?”  His laugh almost tempted one of hers. “Not quite. Save your questions for another night, I trust we’ll have one.” He sounds more self assured than the corporate suits that rule the city, is such a thing possible? She stood, laces tied, envelope secure, and hugged herself. The chill of the night had never been so clear to her as it was now.  “If I tell you no, again, will you seek me out?” “You sought me first, I only thought to return the favour.” Is that… A touch of defence? How interesting.  “Very well, I-” “I thought I’d lost you for a minute there, everything all right?” The Assistant’s voice cut through the alley, she turned around, putting on a reassuring smile. “I needed to tie my laces that’s all.” She took a few steps toward him, only glancing back as they went to turn back onto the street. The alley was empty, he was gone.  His letter seemed to weigh more in her pocket before, she placed a hand over it to steady it, and herself. My refusal paid off, he’s more interested than ever before. The more interest, the more willing he is to tell his story. He wanted another night, she sought out plenty more - and she would have them. She had him hooked, and she knew it. 

good grief this week's one is LATE (apologies dear reader, these past few days have been busy ones) but here you go! this week's letter is all typed up, compiled and heading your way!

~ A Girl and Her Quill

Tag List! (if you want to be notified when a WIS post comes out, interact with this post :) )

@lead-to-code @catwingsathena @nothoughtsjustmhaandotherthings @thestorywitch @lunaeuphternal

@theaistired @frostedlemonwriter

[threeletterslife]

Update

TL;DR: below the keep reading, vote on my update schedule

Hey everyone :) It's been a while—five months since I've last posted on this account and nearly a year since I've posted the 35th chapter of LOD

First and foremost, I want to apologize for being gone much longer than expected, and I will apologize again for being unable to offer more clarity about my absence, for now and in the future. Thank you to everyone who sent kind asks/messages checking up on me and to everyone who was invested enough in LOD to inquire about an update schedule. I felt a lot of guilt for not being active and for not delivering or meeting expectations, so just wanted to send out my sincerest apologies :')

I will attempt to answer the three most commonly asked questions I've gotten during my hiatus in this post:

Will you be continuing LOD?

Yes. As I've said time and time again, I will never abandon a story that I've invested so much of my time into. Call it sunk cost fallacy or delusion but I will finish LOD if it's the last thing I ever fucking do lol. Updates will be slow, however. But I promise you now that I will never actually leave. If I do suddenly disappear for years, that honestly means that I've died lol

When will you be posting a new chapter?

This depends on you guys. In all honesty, I have chapters 36 to 39 "ready" to publish. I am not in the position to write at this moment in time, so this would mean after I post chapter 39, there's no telling when the next update will be :( I have two options for you guys:

OPTION 1: I can post all of the chapters I have written in one go

Pro: You'll have access to all of the existing (and finished) LOD content, which is very well-deserved, so you can binge-read to your heart’s content

Con: You'll probably have to wait over half a year for chapters 40 and beyond

OPTION 2: I can post one chapter monthly/bi-monthly on a consistent schedule

Pro: I'll be able to buy some time (it'll take 4-7 months to post the remaining chapters) to write so that by the time I post chapter 39 (later this year or early next year), I'll most likely have chapters 40+ ready so you won't be as much in the dark about my future update schedule

Con: You'll only get one chapter every ~1.5 months. I also can't guarantee I'll have chapters 40 and beyond ready to go after I finally publish chapter 39 but I'd try my best

Are you alive? How are you doing? Are you okay?

I'm managing, though it's been a while since I've felt like I've been living. I've been in survival mode constantly for the past year, and it's quite draining. But the good news is that I'll be graduating next year with my degrees, so I expect I'll be freer then. I'm currently taking classes and working at my internship so I'm constantly inundated with projects and exams

I have been writing, though. That's one thing in my life that will never change. College has been hard on me, though it has also been such a privileged, fun, and rewarding experience. It helped me grow up or maybe even devolve in some ways. I've met some diabolical people around here, and have had not-so-great experiences that definitely forced me to become less trusting and stern. Sometimes I miss my old self, but I also know that I've grown into someone who can be more tolerant of the complete BS that is occasionally adulthood LMAO

Anyway, I'm extremely oversaturated with STEM everywhere I go, which given my majors, is a no-brainer. But I find great reprieve in art, especially art that I create to heal myself. So I've slowly come to realize that the content that I want to create—and the content that makes me happy to create—is not well-aligned with LOD. Over the past year, I've been working on small side projects, such as an original collection of short stories that I feel really at peace with. I've said it before and I'm saying it again, but LOD has always been my challenge piece. I don't dabble often in fantasy, and I wanted to give it a go; I'll finish what I've started. But I would also hate to reduce what LOD is to a simple word like "fantasy," though that was my excuse to avoid writing it for months. I actually think LOD's a lot more than that. In a way, it's a character study; it's not purely about the magic systems. In fact, I don't even think I put that much emphasis on the magic systems in the first place. It's more about the characters, and what the people have to go through during a war, which I've also realized becomes increasingly pertinent given the political climate right now

I'm getting into ramble-town territory, so I'll stop for now. I think with all that being said, I'm doing okay. I'm exhausted, but I'm also an incredibly privileged person, so I should be grateful for where I am in life right now and the people who have helped me rise to this level (you included!)

I'm excited to graduate, and I'm excited to write every single day once I start my full-time job. My life goal is to publish a book, though I don't think it'll be a novel—either a novella or a collection of short stories. Anyway, if you've come this far, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I will forever be grateful for this platform that I have and also be incredibly honored that people read what I put out here. I'll begin posting as soon as the poll is completed

Thank you for being patient with me, and I hope you stay happy and healthy <3

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

6, 7, 10

WOW THAT WAS FAST

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

whew getting right to it, huh?

hmm...i guess there's always a sense of imposter syndrome, you know? like i've had people tell me "you're such a great writer!" and "i can totally see you publishing one day!", from family, friends, and teachers. i was even voted "most likely to write a book" for my sophomore year yearbook.

and yet. there is always that lingering sense of what if i'm not that good? What if nobody likes it?

believe me - i know the saying "write what makes YOU happy" and i stand by that! but there is also going to be that itty-bitty feeling of hurt if somebody doesn't like it (and tells you it. which is very rude btw don't do that.)

I guess it stems down to the fact that while I like writing for myself, I also like that positive encouragement from the readers.

which does happen a lot XD i'm flooded with comments the next morning after i post a fic and i rarely - if ever - see a rude/criticizing one. Screams? Oh yes. I savor those screams. But I haven't read a criticizing one on any of my ToA fics (BT? A fair few. Lolling usually got there first though and deescalated the situation much quicker than I would have.)

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

MAKING MY READERS SUFFER!

...jk. but also not haha <3

I really like piecing together all these myths and getting a coherent plotline out from them. Also, absolutely love writing Apollo he's the best <3

also, the enjoyment of the readers are always great too. there's bonding to be done in the comment sections of fics, and i love to ramble about the fic process XD

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

absolutely.

there's been many things that have occupied brain-space. But Trials of Apollo has taken the cake.

I tried to write fanfiction for PJO in middle school. dropped it after a couple fics. deleted them too because i was very cringed out by them XD

attempted a PJO/HP crossover. trashed that too.

tried just HP. nothing ever came of it.

Warrior cats i made a cracky Time-Travel AU but also Lolling and I smacked out heads together and made Burning Thistles (still in progress btw - 170 chapters in) but it didn't exactly...haunt me, ya know? I love BT, and I really should get to the next chap soon, but it wasn't quite haunting me.

Star Wars infected me during Quarantine and I pumped out like. 30 fics in Whumptober plus a few others, but then steam kinda died out.

Until...ToA.

It haunts me. No other series has done this. It occupied my thoughts. My actions. My homework. My music. Everything I see, do, or think has some thread of ToA in it.

As for my own writing...heh. anything Copollo. they have permanent headspace and i have no intent of giving them the boot anytime soon.

Also...my Hunger Games AU is very very juicy. i can't wait until it's all done so i can finally share it! about 10 chapters left <3

and well. ^ i think it's pretty obvious what I think haunting means lol

it never leaves your thoughts

[chongoblog]

Valentine's Day OC Ship Gushing: Dancefloor

So my poll has been up for about 20 minutes, and (despite where I placed my vote, it was mostly there as a placeholder), I'm incredibly happy to see that both of the top spots are from The Red Kraken, which is the story I've been excited to write about for the last, like, five years.

Now maybe it's because you all loved the names or maybe you guys just love pirates (which mood to both), so I'm just gonna get it going because I want to talk about Dancefloor. The cute ship between the two furries, because I've been thinking about them a lot. Continuing under the readmore

So first things first, this is for a series that I've been meaning to write, and unlike the other Red Kraken ship, this is a relationship that develops over the course of the story, so for both of the RK ships I'll have to be brief with some of the details, seeing how I'd hate to spoil too much of the story. Also, everything is still technically a work in progress, so even though I'm speaking pretty broadly, some things may change somewhat. That said, let's talk about Them.

(art being post is by @stoatunquote who has created some Good RK Content and they are very awesome and swag)

So first we have Disco

Disco is a new recruit to the crew of the Red Kraken, a pirate crew that, in the story, is exploring a newly revealed world full of mystery and adventure. Specifically, she convinced a newly made friend to help her stow away at the last second before they set off. Having lived most of her life on the streets, she's always hungry for adventure, jumping into new experiences without a second thought. She's incredibly confident, believing herself to have a silver tongue, able to convince anyone of anything with her charisma (despite the fact that she usually cannot), and she is also something of a kleptomaniac, enjoying theft as if it were a craft in and of itself, sometimes preferring stealing something than having it be given to her.

And then the other half, Tap

Tap is a woman of few words. She prides herself on her skills with the bow and arrow and her abilities in stealth and scouting. She had joined the crew a few years ago, and even now, there are a few members who have yet to fully earn her trust. Granted, earning her trust is incredibly difficult to do. Without going too deep into it, her backstory, which includes losing an enormous portion of her large family after being betrayed by someone she had trusted, lends herself to being not trusting in the slightest. Her reason for joining at first centered around getting revenge, and while she still thinks about getting that revenge, she's come to adjust to life on the crew, willing to wait for the moment she can get that revenge. She also attempts to keep a cold and serious demeanor, although she is not very good at hiding when she is legitimately excited about something, usually outwardly denying said excitement.

Tap is the first member of the crew that Disco meets, being held at bowpoint by the bunny with an icy glare. Disco falls in love almost instantly, at first mostly as just attraction. Because there's something about being held at bowpoint. As Disco and Mac (the other guy) are brought on as new recruits with Tap assigned to watch over them. Over time, that attraction turns into a more genuine and more heartfelt caring. Tap finds herself constantly annoyed by Disco at first, slowly also growing to care for the other.

So why do I love this ship so much? First of all, the dynamic in the way they act with one another is very playful one, with Disco constantly trying to sweet-talk Tap, only for her to be completely immune to her "silver tongue" or attempting to steal little trinkets from her only to be stopped by Tap's incredibly acute senses. On the other hand, Disco also enjoys the challenge of trying to get her to show excitement past the cold demeanor, and she can tell that deep down Tap enjoys these little challenges, sometimes giving equally playful retorts (each one driving Disco absolutely crazy)

But on a bit of a deeper level, they have a lot of similarities and differences that really serve to help each other as they grow closer. In terms of similarities, both of them have experienced a level of betrayal in their past. Also they're both Beastials (which is the in-universe way of saying they're furries), and while I'm not sure how much I plan to dive into the Societal Implications of that (because that sort of thing can get allegorically complicated very fast, oh hi Zootopia), being a Beastial definitely has an effect on their backstory. They also both hold a lot of passion and excitement for the little things in life (no matter how much Tap tries to hide it).

But the most important part about them is that they act as a foil for one another in a very important way. The best way I can describe this is they differ in the idea of the journey vs the destination. Due to Disco's past, she believes herself to be powerless against the sheer scale and power of the rest of the world. So her approach to that is to live out the rest of her life simply enjoying the journey with no thoughts to where it will lead her. After all, her actions won't have an effect on much, so why have any sense purpose behind her actions outside of "here for a good time, not a long time"?

Tap, on the other hand, believes that the ends justify the means, completely unfocused on how things get done, moreso focusing on what the result will be. After all, she joined the crew first and foremost to get revenge. And for the first few months on the crew, she likely had that solely occupying her mind. There's no time to smell flowers when there's work to be done.

And I'm hoping that as I write the story of these two growing closer that they can learn to grow from one another. I've known for a long time that Disco's arc is going to mostly include her learning to have a purpose behind what she does and slowly learning what that purpose is. Tap's arc I'm still trying to get a firm grasp of, but I imagine in large part it will be learning to let herself enjoy the little things through life and learning to not deny herself that pleasure.

Anyway, I think out of all of my ships, this one is actually my favorite. I really hope that I can make it a reality, and writing about it has only fueled my passion to write about the Red Kraken a little bit more. I really really REALLY hope that I can use this energy to do this. MY New Years Resolution this year was to make them real to some extent, so here's hoping I can focus on doing exactly that.

And as a final touch, even though I cannot draw, here They are

[sukisdeliveryservice]

back to you.

✎ pairing — spiderman!chan x school reporter!reader (terms are gn but chan calls the reader pretty and there is a mention of them wearing a dress at the end)

✎ genre — spiderman au, fluff (lots of it), tiny angst, an attempt at humour

✎ warning(s) — swearing, a brief mention of blood, poorly written fight scenes, a poor understanding of how chemistry and injuries work (i'm so sorry)

✎ word count — 9.2 k words

✎ synopsis — it’s not easy being your friendly neighbourhood spiderman, not when you have a crush on a very, very cute reporter.

↳ this is also for ficscafe's dpe event! using prompts #31 & #13!

✎ a/n — thank you @starlightjoong for helping me bring this idea to life! while i was writing this fic, she was writing the secret language of flowers !! ily bestie! 💖 also @minghaofilm !! it's finally complete :) thank you for crying over chan with me.

this is my first long oneshot, and to be honest i'm kind of unhappy with how the middle portion was written? 😭 a lot of parts are kind of vague and probably inaccurate and i'm sorry for that, i'll work harder to do better research and improve my writing! all feedback is appreciated~ ily guys!! 🤧💖

“Gooood morning Diamond Hill High! This is your host yn speaking—”

“—and their co-host Soonyoung speaking!”

“And welcome to the DHH Show!”

Soonyoung gives you a sideways grin, this was always the highlight of your mornings. You twirl your pen and grin back as Soonyoung raises the enthusiasm in his voice for the camera. “For today’s agenda, we are going to be talking all about superheroes!”

“And for our first guest, you know him for writing the script for our upcoming production of Beauty and the Beast—”

“—Tickets for Beauty and the Beast go on sale next week!”

“That’s right Soonyoung! Now please welcome...Joshua Hong!”

The hushed claps coming from you and Soonyoung, as well as that one kid from the AVI club you could never remember the name of, echoes throughout the school’s storage room as Joshua makes his way into frame and sits on the small chair placed at front of your desk.

“Ah, for the record guys, next time can I be introduced as the head journalist for the school newspaper instead?”

“You got it Joshua! Now, the students of Diamond Hill High voted on superheroes to be this week’s topic. Would you please walk us through a little bit of what the newspaper team had in mind for the next issue?”

Joshua takes the makeshift mic from your hand and tries not to show his surprise at its quality. It’s a real mic, it just appears that you’ve wrapped some cardboard around it and pasted the school’s logo on the front for a...professional feel.

“Right. So this month the newspaper team decided to coincide the special additions page with the theme for this month’s DHH Morning Show—”

“This was all yn’s idea by the way!” Soonyoung pipes in, and you try not to smile too wide as to appear cheeky.

“And she’s also one of our journalists! We’ll be featuring all sorts of articles and anecdotes about the heroes in today’s modern society, so be sure to check it out!”

“Thank you Joshua! You heard it here first folks, the Diamond Hill High Newspaper Club has all sorts of juicy stories coming your way. Now, back to you Soonyoung— ! Oh wait, first and foremost the joke of the day...”

Chan grins up at the fuzzy television screen that was hung above in his homeroom’s hallway. One of the few reasons he always came to school on time was to see you start everyone’s mornings with your cheery personality. Others found the DHH Morning Show to be corny, but he thought that your personality made it exceptionally charming.

Upon hearing you tell the joke of the day, Chan shakes his head and laughs quietly to himself while putting his skateboard into his locker and slinging his backpack onto his shoulder for the first class of the morning.

“I have a plan.”

Chan falls back into his chair and finishes scribbling down the last of the notes from today’s class. As the bell rings to signal the end of the school day, he nudges his best friend until said friend pulls out the headphones he had been hiding under this sweatshirt.

“You have a plan?” Vernon says, barely audible, already half asleep and completely ready to head home, but Chan chooses to ignore his friend’s half-lidded gaze and taps the table impatiently a few times before sliding over a notepad. “This is how I’m going to confess.”

“Sorry but, how many of these have you gone through with me? And how many have been successful?”

“This is the one! Let me run this through with you on the way home okay? I'm going to ask them to prom, and there’s one month for it to happen.”

Vernon only squints and tosses Chan his jacket, which had slid off the chair unbeknownst to Chan’s excitement. “Which is just code for you saying that you want to procrastinate a little more right?”

Correct. Chan huffs and swings his backpack over his shoulder. Vernon was right, but he would never admit it out loud. He can only mumble instead, “No, that’s not it...”

“Just, run it by with me once we head out okay? We can even stop by the skate park if you’d like.”

Yeah, I would like that. Chan nods and turns back to do a quick check of his things before turning on his heel facing the door, on his way to grab his skateboard from his locker.

“Hey!”

Chan almost drops his notebook and curses as he fumbles with it rather lamely while you hold your hands out trying to calm him down between giggles. “Sorry, sorry!” You laugh some more, but Chan doesn’t find himself getting bothered by your reaction. His hand finds the back of his neck while he tries to slow down his heart rate. He feels the hints of a blush begin to creep upon his cheeks and he turns away from you promptly to avoid your gaze.

Vernon, is nowhere to be found. And Chan doesn’t know whether to be thankful or terrified that his friend just left him alone in an empty classroom with his crush.

“Hey! Umm did you leave something behind?”

Lame. So lame. Why couldn’t he have replied with something cool? Like—

“Not really! I just wanted to talk with you, Vernon actually suggested that I should for this idea I have...”

Vernon? Vernon actually talked to you, for him? Chan glances at his phone and makes a mental note to buy Vernon food from the cafeteria during the next lunch period they shared. He quickly turns back to you however, not wanting to look uninterested when it was actually the opposite, “Oh! What’s it about?”

You grin and take out your own notepad. Chan tries not to notice how cute you look, tapping the pen on the edge of the paper like a real reporter about to get filled in on some juicy details. Your twinkling eyes and bouncy steps distract him from the fact that he was going to be the first subject for your questioning.

“So I’m writing for the school newspaper right? And I was thinking...”

“You did not just set me up for self sabotage!”

Chan presses his wrists into his eyes and groans, falling onto the bench and nearly sending his skateboard flying into a child after he kicks it accidentally out of exasperation. He bows his head in apology when he ends up being on the receiving end of a harsh glare from the mother.

“Well I didn’t know that they were going to ask for your help for an article about yourself! They just asked if I knew anyone who wasn’t paired up with a writer yet so they could take the photos.”

Joining the photography club was probably the best decision Chan has ever made in his high school career. Not only did it allow him some leeway between classes, but it also allowed him to meet you. And seeing you in your element, excitedly directing the writers, editors and photographers to their stations and assigning projects, made him excited to work.

“How. On. Earth. Am I supposed to take photos for an article about Spiderman?” Chan takes his head into his hands as Vernon pats his back. It was frustrating that his only chance of working with you closely was for a project that was impossible for him to take part in.

“Sorry dude, but next time they asks I’ll definitely ask what it’s about first before turning them to you.”

“No, no, I’m really grateful for what you did by the way. I just really wanted to say no but—”

“Wait, you didn’t turn down their offer?” Vernon abruptly pauses before his kickflip to stare at his best friend and Chan rubs the back of his neck while avoiding the gaze of disbelief that was aimed his way. “I may have said I was going to meet with them this weekend to brainstorm some ideas?”

“Dude, you’re so whipped.”

Chan runs a hand through his hair and sighs. He doesn’t know if it's out of amusement at his own actions, or stress from the new situation at hand. He decides that it’s because he’s going to meet you this Saturday, and he can’t wait to see the outfit you have planned.

“Yeah, I am.”

When Chan walks into the cafe, the scent of coffee and baked goods hits him before the warmth of the cozy ambiance, the sound of muffled chatter, and the calls for order numbers register within his mind.

He easily spots you in the corner, typing away at your laptop whilst sipping on what he would assume to be a triple mocha. You see, he's remembered your order by heart ever since that one time he and Vernon were assigned to food pickup duty during a newspaper jam session.

It’s not like Chan has never spoken to you before. You’ve had your fair share of conversations while putting the newspaper together. It was just that he never had any real excuse to spend more time with you.

You didn’t share any classes, and whenever he wasn’t swinging around the city, putting stops to robberies and saving cats from trees, you were hustling under tight deadlines and coordinating with the heads of all school activities.

In short, Chan wasted no time jumping at his first opportunity to get to know you better. And he was yet to figure out a solution to the problem that came with that.

Once you spot Chan, you give a small wave to beckon him over and Chan quickly hurries to your table, sliding into the chair in front of you. While removing his jacket, you slide a mug towards him, and Chan immediately recognizes the drink when he catches a whiff of the steam still blowing out.

“How did you know that I liked lattes?”

“I think I was on food pickup duty for our last jam session? Well you ordered this for the all-nighter, so I just thought you might like it again today.”

You have an eye smile, Chan notices. And he adds that onto the mental list of things that he likes about you. “Yeah,” Unbeknownst to him, you’re also noticing the way he smiles for the first time, “I do.”

“I guess you can say that I’ve noticed a latte— Ah! Sorry that was terrible.” Chan begins to laugh at the way you cover your face with your hand out of embarrassment. So maybe you were a bit of a dork too. He likes this side of you a lot.

“Anyways! Let’s get started.” You take another sip of your drink and Chan tries not to wrinkle his nose at the fact that he could practically smell the sugar steaming out of the lid. He was in no position to judge coffee orders, as he had his own fair share of energy drinks before night patrol. It amazed him how his mind perceived everything you as endearing.

“I’ve been doing some of my own research, and have found a few areas where frequent sightings of Spiderman have occurred.”

You whip out your phone and lean closer to Chan’s side of the table to show him some photos. Chan tries not to notice how you smell like strawberries, and he wonders if you had tried a new shampoo recently.

His heart starts to feel heavy when you start swiping through photos of Spiderman, to no surprise hanging around the places Chan liked to frequent, including the top of the city’s conservatory building, the stairwell behind his favourite local sandwich shop, and the library by the corner on the same block of the school.

The city’s conservatory building always had the best views, and Chan liked to sit there to admire the bustling streets of the city and observe the little people, wondering what kind of lives they led that was beyond what his eyes could tell. The spot was very open to the public’s eye if he sat on the ledge, but he didn’t mind if it made people feel safe to have someone watching over them.

The local sandwich shop was run by a kind old man who used to give Chan free snacks and drinks after classes, during his middle school days. He liked to keep his change of clothes in the alleyway next to the shop. Chan isn’t sure if the owner was aware of his hidden storage area, but he doesn’t feel like bringing up that conversation.

Now the school library. Chan doesn’t spend much time there other than to pick up the occasional comic book. But he knows from his routinely city patrols that you go there after school almost every day, presumably to do some further research for the next article you were writing. Chan knows that you are perfectly capable of handling yourself, but that doesn’t stop him from lingering at that spot a little longer just to check if you made it home safely afterwards.

“—These photos are too blurry to use, so I need you to take a few clear pictures around these spots for the article. They don’t have to be while I’m interviewing of course, candids from any time will work. Does that sound good Chan?”

I can do this, Chan figures that he could take a few of his own candids during patrol before the time you were planning to do your interview. There was no need for him to take pictures of Spiderman, so the plan was perfect. The one thing that he cannot pinpoint for the life of him is why you were so adamant on this particular project.

“Gotcha, although may I ask why candids from these specific spots? And why Spiderman of all people? He’s a pretty busy guy you know— swinging around, doing cool stuff, like fighting…”

You purse your lips, and for a moment Chan thinks that you’re going to say something obvious like: Spiderman? Of course I’m going to write about him, he’s always saving the day and who wouldn’t want to read about that?

“Because,” You finish the last of your coffee, and the sound it makes when you place it back on the table brings Chan’s attention back to your storming irises, partially dreamy and fully determined.

Like a true journalist. “Spiderman’s a person, someone who probably hangs around these spots when he’s not in costume for a reason. He has a life and he has a story. But he’s still risking everything for this damn city, so I just want to ask him, why?”

You break eye contact to call for another order of triple mocha. This time, with extra sugar. Chan is at a loss for words because his mind was still pondering over your last comment. You didn’t seem to notice, as you continued rambling all of your ideas to him while occasionally typing in new ones into your document.

Chan doesn’t mind, he likes hearing you talk.

Unknown ID : hey Chan! this is yn speaking~ i asked Vernon for your number if that’s okay?

Unknown ID : remember when i said candids of those spots from any time will work? well I was thinking that maybe the article would feel more authentic if we had a few shots with Spiderman in it!

Unknown ID : what do you say about going on a little search for spidey?

Well, shit.

The cool spring breeze tickles Chan’s face as he walks with you side by side along the streets of South Korea. It has been approximately one hour since your “search” for Spiderman had begun, and Chan feels extremely guilty as he sees you get more and more ansty.

“I swear he’s really easy to spot, sometimes I feel like he does it on purpose. I’ve even seen a few glimpses of him swinging by buildings after school.”

You’ve noticed when Chan was watching over you after school? The other times, yes he was trying to be a little more public about his appearance. But after school? He really needed to work on his stealth training.

“Maybe he’s busy? Saving cats from trees or helping old ladies cross the street?”

You laugh for the first time since you started searching, and Chan immediately wants to hear it again. “You’re right, I can’t expect him to appear just because I want him to. We can go looking another time.”

“Yeah, we can.” Chan tucks his hands into his pockets and tries to focus his attention on the street you’re about to cross instead of seeing you disappointed because of him. “Why don’t you give up on Spiderman and go chase after Iron Man instead?”

He meant to say it as a joke to lighten the mood, but he doesn’t expect you to look down and fiddle with your hands. You had a habit of playing with your hands, which only makes Chan want to hold them more. Your voice is quieter, and he swears you almost sound shy, “But I like Spiderman.”

Chan momentarily freezes in his place. “You like Spiderman?” God, why did you have to look so cute smiling at the ground as you swing your hands back and forth like an excited child. “I mean, he is pretty cool I guess but Spiderman? Of all the superheroes?”

You look like you’re about to say something else, but aren’t able to finish your thought when the sounds of sirens start to echo across the city, the noise reaching closer and closer to your ears by the second.

A loud blast follows the sound of the sirens and Chan immediately drags you by the hand across the street and pulls you behind a car. You peek from behind the vehicle just to see a truck crash onto the pavement along the very sidewalk you were just walking on.

The sound of the blast rang through your ears as you scream out of panic, not being able to process your surroundings or move your legs. You see Chan’s lips moving but you can’t make out what he’s saying to you. You’re immediately pulled into his chest and you squeeze your eyes shut.

You were used to seeing stories on the news about events like this, you’ve even written a few articles about them yourself. But you never imagined that you would find yourself in the middle of one. You’re only allowed a few seconds to bury your face into the soft material of Chan’s shirt before you regain your hearing.

Chan has to pull you away and hold you by the shoulders. There are a million emotions flashing across his face but you could only make out the way his eyes just look so guilty.

“Yn, I’m going to need you to head over to the sandwich shop across the street by yourself okay? You’ll be safe there

For the first time, you are at a loss of words. Was Chan really going to leave you here when both of your lives were in danger? You could only focus on the way Chan rubs the sides of your arms and pleads to you with his eyes. You snap back into reality when Chan gets up from your hiding place and you are quick to grab onto his sleeve. “Wait! Please don’t leave me here— Chan I’m— I’m scared.”

“I’ll come back to you right away, I promise. Just— Just do this for me please okay yn?”

Maybe it’s the urgency swimming through his eyes, or the shouts of people from the distance that urge you to slowly release your grip on Chan’s sleeve. He gives you a small reassuring smile and squeezes your shoulders one last time before booking it down the street in the direction of the commotion.

You regain the feeling in your legs again and start running.

The sandwich shop owner lets you in without hesitation and ushers you into the back room along with a few other customers. He didn’t look scared at all, as if he knew the protocol like the back of his hand.

You don’t know how long it is before the sounds disappear from outside, but you stay in the sandwich shop for a few more hours. You don’t move places because Chan said he was going to come back.

When you don’t see the familiar brunette boy enter the shop after another hour, you head out and look for him yourself. The sandwich shop owner and customers don’t notice you sneaking out of the backdoor amidst their hushed conversations.

You were going to look for Chan and bring him back with you. Doesn’t he know how dangerous it is to be running off in the middle of a city wide lockdown?

The streets are eerily quiet. The city looks like something straight out of a dystopian novel from the way the cars are flipped over, debris from neighbouring buildings are scattered amongst the roads, and there are no people whatsoever.

Despite your initial terror, your mind couldn’t help but construct a headline from this event. Perhaps Spiderman— No. The school newspaper was not a priority right now. You needed to find Chan, and Chan needed to be safe.

You don’t even make it to the end of the block before you hear the first siren after many hours. This was a mistake. You needed to keep searching for Chan. Should you head back to the sandwich shop? Your mind was telling you to head back to safety, but your feet wouldn’t stop moving forward. Where was Chan?

The sounds of your footsteps come to halt when you round the corner and are met face to face with someone who definitely isn’t Chan.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Standing before you is a man wearing an all black suit made of what appears to be the skin of a reptile. You stop breathing when the man morphs into something unrecognizable and protrudes a veiny neck that turns towards your direction. You aren't even given time to think before it lets out a gut wrenching screech.

You stumble backwards and hit the concrete while pressing your hands over your ears, you swear they’re about to bleed. The sound feels like it’s piercing through your body and you start to see stars in your eyes. Amidst your hazy vision, you see a body on the pavement behind the creature, you hope yours isn’t going to be one of them.

As if on cue, a web shoots from behind you and a flash of red whips past your figure.

“So there you are! I thought I was going to have to— wait m- ma’am?”

“A friend of yours Spiderman?” The creature takes a step towards you and you flinch, but Spiderman immediately covers you from its gaze with his body. When it bares its teeth and you try not to look at the blood dripping from its fangs.

There is a throbbing sensation on your ankle, probably from your fall. But all you could do was stay paralyzed in fear as Spiderman and the creature circle each other in the middle of the tight spaced alleyway.

Something lunges forward. You aren’t given time to think before Spiderman takes you by the waist and swings into the air.

“Didn’t I say— why aren’t you in hiding with the rest of the city?” Spiderman zips through the city swinging from building to building as the creature tails closely from behind. You don’t have the strength to open your eyes as your arms wrap limply around his neck.

At some point, Spiderman sends you both spinning through the air and you use all of your willpower to swallow the vomit rising in your throat. “I’m sorry,” you whisper. Spiderman probably could have defeated the villain long ago if you weren’t too nosy for your own good. You were sure he couldn’t hear you, but you feel a hand squeeze your waist reassuringly.

He drops you off on the rooftop of the city’s conservatory. The creature is nowhere in sight, but you know he’s going to have to get back to the fight as soon as possible. “Stay here this time okay? Don’t go anywhere and I promise that I will come back for you.”

“Wait!” Spiderman freezes at your voice. When he turns around, a familiar feeling settles within your gut and you cannot pinpoint where it comes from. “My friend, I was looking for my friend Chan. Have you seen him? He just ran off and I don’t know if he’s okay. He’s about this tall, has a really sweet smile and he’s always holding a skateboard and—”

“He’s safe.” You bounce on the balls of your feet, not entirely convinced yet. “I made sure that everyone in this city was settled into a hiding space beforehand.”

You slowly nod, and Spiderman proceeds to launch himself off the building. This time you are set on believing the last words spoken to you before being left behind.

You start looking for a place to hide, but almost trip over something slippery stuck to your shoe. You rub it against the ground vigorously, but it only releases a stench that you could only recognize from chemistry class. You run to the edge of the conservatory roof and muster all the breath you can to call out.

“Spiderman! Spiderman! Use water! This— this thing, is hydrophilic! Ms. Kang from eleventh grade chemistry said so!”

You were on top of a conservatory. There had to be water somewhere. Ignoring the pain in your ankle, you hobble over to the stairs and start desperately searching for a source of water.

It looks like Spiderman’s fight with the creature had moved the bottom of the conservatory building. You bid Spiderman a silent apology as you run past the scene. From the corner of your eye you see Spiderman take another blow to the chest. You wince and start praying to the gods that somewhere there would be— aha.

When you turn around, Spiderman is lying limp on the concrete. If it wasn’t for the faint rising and falling of his chest, you would have thought he was dead, but you don’t even want to think of that possibility right now.

“All worn out Spidey?” The creature’s voice comes out in hissed breaths as it begins to take the form of a man again, and your hands start to shake as you watch Spiderman try and fail to get up. “I wonder...” It drawls its words in slow, panting breaths, "What your little friend would say if I happened to lift that mask." A slimy gloved hand reaches out to dig its nails into Spiderman's neck, you see a flash of pale skin underneath—

You twist the valve with all the strength in your body.

Your body shakes as water blasts out of the nozzle with overwhelming pressure, you were pretty sure that the ruckus around the conservatory’s area may have damaged some of the equipment.

The man-creature falls to the pavement as you carelessly increase the valve’s pressure and aim it in his direction. The source of the water explodes and you feel a cold shock hurl you backwards, you pray that the blast reaches the enemy.

You’re pretty sure that you were knocked unconscious, because the next time you open your eyes, you are lying in a puddle of something sticky and the man-creature is nowhere in sight.

The sounds of police sirens snaps you out of your daze and you turn to your side to see Spiderman still in his spot, this time, you aren’t sure if he’s breathing.

“Spiderman! Wake up, please Spiderman! The police are on their way!”

Spiderman stirs a little, and you almost engulf him in a hug, that is, if you knew for sure that he didn’t have any broken ribs. On instinct you take his hand, you hope that somehow your energy would transfer over to him. You squeeze it and rub circles into his palm, it probably does more comfort for you than him.

Nevertheless, it works. You breathe out a sigh of relief when Spiderman stirs from his spot and immediately sits up. He takes you by the waist again, and swings you somewhere far away.

You don’t question it when Spiderman drops you off at your exact address, there are some things that are not worth questioning at the moment. You both were a soaked mess. But you’re pretty sure Spiderman had it way worse than you from the way he sways back and forth on your window’s ledge.

“Spider—” Spiderman falls forward and you catch him. His weight causes you to tumble onto the floor but you don’t let go of your arms around him.

“I’m sorry— ” he begins, but you shush him. “Don’t be. Thank you for saving my life.” He says something else but it only comes out as a mumble as you usher him to lean on you for support, but you’re also wincing at your ankle.

Somehow, you’re able to place him in a lying position and are about to lift your arm, but you hesitate, not wanting to take off his mask without his permission. You knew he could get into serious trouble if you did. Sensing your hesitation, Spiderman reaches for his mask and does it for you.

Chan.

You try your best to keep a composed figure for the injured boy lying in front of you; but all your mind can do is spin in circles at the fact that the sweet boy from the photo club is the very superhero that has been swinging around your city and defeating villains. You may also be try to process: what the actual fuck is Spiderman doing in your bedroom.

The article. No wonder Chan always looked so nervous whenever you asked him for his thoughts about the article. It all made sense now, and you feel guilty for having been so pushy about it, even though you had no way of knowing that he was actually Spiderman.

“I trust you,” is all he says. His eyes are closed and there’s a fresh bruise forming on his cheek. You will yourself to stay calm, and you sigh in relief when the injuries don’t look as bad as how you originally imagined.

This wasn’t the shy, sweet Chan you were used to seeing riding to school on his skateboard and bringing in snacks for the newspaper club. This was a defeated Chan who was no longer trying to move, he was alive, but he just looked so helpless.

“Are you able to breathe okay? Any swelling around your ribs?”

“They’re not broken,” he croaks. You trust him, he would know a lot more about injuries than you do.

“I’m going to just clean you up okay? We have a first aid kit in here somewhere and I can definitely wrap those bruises up and—”

“Thank you.” Chan’s eyes are still closed but his voice is stronger now, almost as if he’s trying to reassure you that he was going to be okay. You squeeze his hand and muster a small smile, even if he wasn’t going to see it. He’ll be okay.

Chan wakes up in a room that most definitely isn’t his. There’s a throbbing pain in his arms but he thinks that’s just from overworking his webs. Exhaustion fuzzes his memory and he tries to get a hold of his surroundings.

The star decals stuck to the ceiling are the first thing he notices, and he almost smiles at the childish charm. When he sits up and he also notices that he’s wearing a hello kitty shirt? Okay, so he’s not wearing his clothes either. When he lifts the blanket he's relieved to see that he’s at least wearing a pair of basketball shorts.

He feels something scratching his chest, and lifts the shirt a little to see it wrapped neatly with a bandage. There's a bit of a soreness when he moves, but he feels much better than yesterday.

The room is pretty neat for the most part, except maybe for the pile of papers scattered across the desk in the corner and the heaps of sticky notes scrawled with little notes Chan can’t make out pasted all over the wall above.

The sound of the door creaking snaps him out of his thoughts and he almost faints at the sight before him.

He sees you shyly peek around the doorframe offering a tiny smile while holding a tray of what seemed to be pancakes? Chan’s mind immediately goes into panic mode, but when he jolts into a sitting position and hears you let out a small giggle, he relaxes a bit as his mind replays the events from the previous day. You must have taken care of him and let him stay over, he thinks. He feels guilty for putting such a burden on you.

You were wearing your own Hello Kitty shirt, but along with a pair of pajama bottoms to make the matching set. Chan doesn’t fail to notice your ruffled hair and the way you try to use your elbow to cover a yawn that overtakes you.

His heart falls when he sees you leaning on the door for support, and the way you use the walls to help you hobble over to his side.

“Hey,” you say to break the silence. When you woke up your ankle was throbbing more than ever, and you regret not finding a better way to handle it before falling asleep.

“Are you hurt?” is the first thing Chan asks, but you shake your head and try to smile through the pain.

“No, I’m okay.”

“But why were you limping?” To be honest, you thought that Chan was in a more dire situation than you were. Last night, you remembered him fading in and out of consciousness and mumbling about the pain in his chest. He assured you that he didn’t break anything, but you still worried that there was something serious.

“I may have twisted my ankle but that’s all really,” are the only words you supplied him with. Was it a stupid decision to not have gotten it checked immediately? Maybe, but you didn’t want to leave Spiderman alone and unconscious in your bedroom either.

“You can’t call that nothing yn, let me have a look.” Despite your protests, Chan takes the tray of food from you before ushering you to switch places with him.

He kneels down in front the bed, and you’re grateful that he was looking a lot better than yesterday. When he gently lifts your foot you can’t conceal the faint gasp that leaves your lips at the pain that shoots up your leg.

Chan glances up and gives you a knowing look, but you only huff and wrap your arms around yourself as he grabs the first aid kit you set aside last night. He begins to wrap it carefully, and you’re grateful that he’s way too focussed on his task to see the way your cheeks begin to fill with warmth.

“Promise me that you’ll get this properly checked out at the hospital okay? I don’t want it getting worse.”

“Then we are both going, no excuses Chan, you don’t look like you're in a better state than I am.” You give Chan your best pointed look, but it ends up coming out more like an upset pout. Chan has to hold back his smile. “Deal.”

Chan moves back to sit next to you on the bed and a comfortable silence passes between you both. You’re about to offer Chan the breakfast before he says something else, “So…”

You, having a feeling about what he’s going to bring up next, offer a small smile in his direction, “So…”

“I’m Spiderman.” Chan drawls out his words slowly and carefully, and you laugh at the way he seems more in shock than you do.

“You are.” You take the tray of food and place it over his lap, nodding your head for him to start eating.

Chan obliges, taking a slice of the pancake (that you cut for him) and shoving it into his mouth as he looks at you in disbelief. “You’re not surprised at all?”

“Well I had all night to mull it over when I was washing your suit,” You’re speaking in between giggles now, and Chan doesn’t think he’s ever seen a human as precious as you are. “I’m glad you are though, I mean— being Spiderman and all. I feel much safer knowing that someone like you is watching over the city.”

This time it was Chan’s turn to blush, and mumbles out a quick thank you while looking down at his food. You fiddle with your fingers while sitting on the edge of the bed, you're smiling but you don’t dare to meet Chan’s gaze, in fear that you might go into cardiac arrest.

“Is the food okay?” You say while keeping your eyes facing downwards. From the corner of your eye, you see Chan take another bite before answering your question.

It’s a little burnt, Chan thinks, but it tastes nothing but delicious to him. “It’s perfect.”

“That’s good.” You gently lift your legs to the bed and wrap your arms around them. You let your eyes fall shut for a moment, as you were just beginning to reprocess all the events that had just occurred in the last 24 hours.

“Um,” Chan scratches the back of his neck as if he was just remembering something, “Do your parents know that I’m here? Or do they know that Spiderman was just lying around in your bedroom last night?”

You give Chan a strange look, but it doesn’t last very long when his eyes widen and you start laughing at his reaction. At this point you’re starting to get an idea of what exactly the boy feels for you, but you want to tease him a little bit before you return your own feelings. “It’s just me and my mom actually, and she’s away on a business trip. She knows I’m okay though.”

“Oh so it’s just us here?” Chan immediately regrets the way his words come out, “Not that there’s anything wrong with that! I was just curious, I hope you know that I’d never try anything—”

“I know wouldn’t Chan," His expression falls into one of relief. "—and I understand just being curious. I also hope you know that I wouldn’t say anything about this right? I really appreciate that you trust me.”

Chan's face morphs into one with a smile, you think he looks best smiling that way. “Yeah, I do.” The room falls back to comfortable silence again, and you lie down on the bed to gaze at the stars on your ceiling as Chan finishes his breakfast.

“Also, nice shirt.”

Your eyes flit to Chan and you grin at the way he pinches the material of the shirt he’s wearing and how adorable he looks sitting on your bed with rumpled hair and cheeks puffy from the food in his mouth. “Yeah? It was the largest one I could find, the shorts too.”

Chan makes an appreciative nod at your answer. Two weeks ago, if someone told him that he would be sitting in your bedroom, wearing your clothes, and eating the breakfast you made, he would have most likely passed out on the spot. But he’s glad that he could even call you his friend now, and the fact that you two were able to hang out in such a natural comfortable way brought him immense joy.

“I don’t mean to bring this out of the blue but I was wondering by the way...that maybe you would- I mean if you would like to—”

“—go to prom with you?” You finish for him, and you try not to smile too wide at the way Chan’s jaw drops open.

“How did you know?” Chan’s mind races through a million possibilities. There was no way that you were a superhero too right? Maybe you were—

“Maybe next time don’t keep your confession plan in your suit’s pocket.”

“Ah…” So much for the element of surprise. “So um, would you? I mean, like to go to prom with me? I didn’t mean to ask you this way but I really like you and—”

“Yes”

Chan almost can’t believe it, and he would have reached over to hold your hand if it wasn’t for the fact that you had used them to cover your face as you squealed in delight, “Yes Chan! A million times yes! I would love to go to prom with you.”

You reach over and squeeze Chan’s hands; you had a habit of doing that, and Chan hopes that he’ll be able to see you do it more. "And..." You're having trouble meeting his eyes, but you're able to do so with a warmth to your cheeks. "I also, really like you too Chan."

Chan’s too distracted by your sparkling eyes and blinding smile to even ponder the bizzarity of the current situation. You continue to ramble a little bit more. "Before we go though, can we like, go on a few dates or something? There's still a few weeks or so."

Chan is a little surpirsed at your eagerness, but he is quick to nod and reply with a soft yes.

“And! One more thing,” Chan is in too much of a daze to register everything that was happening at the moment and he replies with another yes without even thinking.

“Are you gonna set me up with an interview with Iron Man or…?”

The room is filled with your giggling protests as Chan pouts and threatens to take back his prom invitation.

You have never felt more confident walking into the school on newspaper release day with a cast on your foot and a Lee Chan holding your hand.

The article turned out even better than you could have ever imagined. Of course, having Spiderman as your boyfriend did give you extra brownie points.

“So umm, how would you describe your...umm your motivations for keeping the city safe?”

“Why are you being so awkward?” Chan reaches over the table and pinches your cheeks, you can't see it, but his smile is so wide that it reaches his ears. You whine and swat his hands away.

“This interview is supposed to be professional Spiderman! No harassing the interviewer with cheek pinching!”

“You know you love it.” Chan leans back on the chair with his hands behind his head and you swear that he’s smirking underneath the mask. He has definitely gotten a lot more comfortable with teasing since you’ve started going out, and you often find yourself finding a reason to be flustered at least once a day. So much for being shy and awkward at first.

Getting the photos was much easier as you and Chan wasted no time in going on your first date, where there was plenty of time to take photos as Chan had decided to take you to different spots around the city.

You were happy to say that the article was a hit. The never-before-seen photos of Spiderman along with the casual interview got multiple shares across social media platforms that weren’t even associated with your school.

You grinned up at the TV screen as your interview with Spiderman played above the hallway on the way to Chan’s locker.

“So Spiderman, I wanted to end by asking; why? Why do you do all of this for the city?”

“Well,” Chan leans over with his elbows on the table and you can see yourself trying to avoid smiling and rolling your eyes. “For people like you."

"Hm? What's that supposed to mean?" You try to conceal the suprise that becomes evident in your body language, but Chan can tell that he's made you a little flustered. He smiles underneath the mask and continues.

"People have lives and they all have stories to tell right? When people like you are so passionate to share what makes the world so great, it pushes me to do better."

“Hey yn!” You see Chan running towards you with his skateboard under his arm. “Are you ready to let me teach you how to skate at the park today?”

His hair is ruffled, and he’s slightly panting. It looks like he just ran out of class to get to you. Every day you find another reason to love Chan, everything about him was so endearing. You take his hand in yours and squeeze it, he squeezes back.

“Of course.”

A FEW WEEKS LATER~

Channie ♥: yn!! yn!! i’m sososo sorry but i don’t think i’m going to be able to meet you at your house tonight because of...you know. i’m so sorry.

Yn ♡: don’t worry about it! i understand completely. I’m just going to carpool with soonyoung and his date and if you finish early, you can meet me there okay?

Channie ♥: i love you.

Your heart warms at the last text, and you reply with your own i love you before texting Soonyoung for a ride. It took a while in the beginning of your relationship to get used to Chan’s spontaneous schedule, but you were more than willing to work things out with just a little more effort.

Some might say that you and Chan had exchanged I love you’s too early, but you got closer in a shorter amount of time than you expected. Maybe it was also because of the fact that your bedroom window was one of his go-to spots after city patrol.

That, and Vernon’s, who you’ve also gotten better acquainted with. Vernon liked to call you his co-person-in-the-chair whenever you two would team up to help Chan get out of class early, or to assist in surveillance on one of his missions.

Prom is pretty boring. Not just because you were the only one without a date, but also because you were the only one without a date. You take your sad place next to the fruit punch stand and watch all the couples sway under the dimmed lights.

If Chan were here, you were sure he would have taken you dancing almost immediately. You’ve had plenty of dates in each other’s rooms when he wasn't busy doing Spiderman stuff where you’d just let the music and play and spend the time jumping around and singing along. You check your phone regularly for any updates as you swallow your disappointment.

You glance down to check the cast on your foot. You were actually on the cusp of getting rid of the cast entirely, but part of you didn’t want to take it off. The little sharpie doodle of a Spiderman mask on the side kept you from getting rid of it entirely.

“Spiderman says to get better soon.” Chan says while adding the finishing touches to his design on your cast. You plant a kiss on the side of his face and his cheeks tinge pink as you both admire his work.

“Yeah? Tell spiderman I said thank you.”

An alert jolts you out of your state and your eyes widen to see a video of Chan- no Spiderman, beating the crap out of some supervillain. After you see him take a fatal blow to the head, you suddenly find yourself chugging the last of the fruit punch and running (more like: hopping) out of the event centre as fast as you could.

“Can I just ask one thing yn?” Chan tries to keep his tone light as he guides you along the paved area of the skatepark. Your hands steadily grip his as your feet remain planted on his skateboard.

“Hm?”

“I need you to promise me that whenever you see me on the news fighting someone, please do not try to go where I am, okay?”

You momentarily look up to meet his eyes from concentrating on your foot placement. “Chan, you know I can’t promise that sort of thing to you…”

Chan knows that this was a difficult thing to ask. He wants to find a solution so, so badly. “Please, please, please yn, I don’t ever want you to get hurt again.”

“Chan I’m going to be a journalist when I leave school, what are you going to do when I have to be where all the action is?”

“Hmm, what are you doing here?”

Spiderman swings down from a building and approaches you while you casually stroll around the park near the scene. The fight barely lasted more than twenty minutes. You were proud to say that your boyfriend's improvement had been accelerating since the last time you saw him fight.

Chan ushers you to follow him while the police are still occupied with the situation, you see someone being handcuffed and someone else being urged to go into the police car. You had already taken a few pictures yourself for an article, but you were more focussed on catching up with your boyfriend.

You didn’t need to answer his question, Chan knew that you were coming.

“Chan I’m going to be a journalist when I leave school, what are you going to do when I have to be where all the action is?”

“I really don’t know to be honest, but I’ll respect whatever decision you make.” Chan smiles and squeezes your hand to reassure the truth of his words. "We have lots of time, we'll find a way."

“Then…” You move closer to rest your head on Chan’s shoulder and play with his fingers. “You’ll be stronger by then right? You’ll be able to protect me and the news crew even better than how you’ve been doing right now.” You feel Chan rest his chin on the top of your head as he silently urges you to continue.

“For now...what if I go meet with you when everything is over? I can still stay with you and get what I need for the newspaper.”

Chan wraps his arms around your waist and sways your bodies side to side. You can’t see his face, but you can hear the satisfaction in his voice, “Sounds like a plan.”

You find yourself in the alleyway behind the sandwich shop you hid during the first day you and Chan went out for Spiderman hunting. Chan grabs a backpack hidden underneath the stairwell and starts changing out of his suit.

You’re facing towards the wall as you hear the rustling of clothes from behind you, “You’re okay right Chan? I know you beat the crap out of that thing in no time but no injuries? Like at all?”

“For your information, I have gotten a lot better since the last time you saw me fight,” Before you’re able to reply, you feel something wrap around your shoulders and you turn and see Chan covering you with an oversized flannel shirt. “It’s cold, and you’re wearing your prom dress, which looks amazing on you by the way.”

Your cheeks warm at his last comment, and you wrap the article of clothing tighter around yourself and inhale the familiar scent. Chan reaches into his backpack and pulls something else out.

“I got you flowers. Sorry they’re uhm… sorry they’re all crumpled.”

It can’t be easy being your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman and a full-time boyfriend to a school reporter. You inhale the sweet scent of the daisies rearranged within the magnolias. “Don’t be sorry, I love them.”

You move closer to adjust his tie properly, and he sneaks a kiss on your nose as you do so. He’s about to go in for another until he freezes in place, and you hear him mutter out a string of curse words.

“What’s the matter?” Chan looks at his watch and groans. "Is that your Chan-tingle telling you something?" Chan nods his head, not without giving your cheek a little pinch at your last comment.

“The villain escaped, I’m gonna have to run back there again. Do you wanna wait here or—”

“Or how about I do a livestream as you beat that thing? You did it last time pretty easily right? What do you think?”

“Yeah, I’d like to see that,” Chan's hand moves to hover above your head before hesitating. See, he would normally ruffle your hair but this time it's all done up and you just look so pretty. Instead he gives you one last grin before pulling the mask over his head and swinging out of the alleyway.

“Soonyoung! I need you here pronto! Spiderman just blew the shit out of that scary looking thing and I need coverage! Take the camera from the record room and get here now!”

You can hear Soonyoung groaning through the phone, and if you weren’t literally about to cover Chan’s biggest fight you would have laughed. “Soonyoung!”

“I heard you! I’m on a date right now you know that yn?”

You now hear Soonyoung hastily explaining to someone on the other side of the phone. It’s muffled, but you can still hear the conversation. “Sorry, sorry, this is really big, and I need to cover the story since no one’s arrived at the scene yet.”

More muffled chatter, and you hear Soonyoung sigh. “It’s for Spiderman. You’re okay with me leaving you here for Spiderman?”

“UH HOLY SHIT IT’S FOR SPIDERMAN? Babe what are you doing? Go now!”

Turns out, you both completely missed prom.

Chan doesn’t really mind, he smiles admiringly at the footage of you doing a broadcast at the scene. You’re sitting down because of your ankle, your hair is windswept and your makeup is smudged from all the running. His favourite part however, is the oversized flannel wrapped around you over your dress. He doesn’t think you could get any prettier than this.

“And there you have it folks! Our friendly neighbourhood Spiderman strikes again and saves our city. We always knew he was reliable. Oh and if you’d like to see some exclusive photos from before and after the fight, you can check out our blog…”

Chan looks up from the camera to see you sitting on the ledge of the conservatory. The wind is tousling through your hair and you sigh while pressing the flowers he gave you close to your chest. It’s not like Chan was expecting a magical night under the hazy lighting within a gymnasium filled with sweaty teenagers. Prom was a little overrated anyway.

Chan joins you on the ledge, the city lights illuminate the serene smiles on your faces, and he makes it a point to take your hand in his and rub circles into your palm.

“Dance with me.”

“But…there’s no music.”

Sometimes Chan wonders if you ever thought about what it would be like to be with him in another life. A life where you weren’t always on your toes waiting for him, or worrying about where he’s gone off to. One where you weren’t always in uncertainty.

But he sees you looking at him expectantly tonight, and the stars in your eyes wash away all the doubts in his mind.

“I don’t mind. Do you?”

[ladyc0312]

A Jikook Guide to RunBTS: 112-121

Yes, I'm still doing these! It's just happening more slowly than I'd like because writing for work + writing fic + trying to go to bed before midnight + so much amazing content being released that clearly must be poured over and dissected = less time to make guides. For anyone still with me, he's the next section!

Ep 112 “Dalbang School Part 1” (Ep: 5 / KM: 4)

The ones with BTS in a classroom driving Teacher Jin insane

5:58 - JM declares that he and Taehyung will pair up (by being the first to hug each other in a game), but then when Hobi blows the whistle at 6:38, JK runs over to hug JM before Tae can get to him.

6:58 - Jin asks why JM said he wanted Tae and then hugged JK. JM explains that he didn't hug him, he just found himself in JK's hug as JK cackles in the background.

7:24 - When Jin blows his whistle at the class, JK and JM mirror each other in putting a finger in one of their ears.

7:35 - Teammates JK and JM are immediately on the same page about wanting their team name to be Kim Seokjin. When they have to change it, JM quickly picks up JK's suggestion that they call their team Bang Sihyuk. These don't sound like particularly unique moments, but when you watch it, it just really strikes you how in sync the two of them are in terms of physicality, ideas, and sense of humor.

9:52 - After Jin comments that he heard JM did very well in school, JK adds that JM was the top student. When someone else asks if JM was the best or second-best, JK forcefully reiterates that he was the best student.

12:45 - When they get a question right, JK and JM clasp hands and bump their shoulders together.

13:10 - JM and JK both goof around, speaking in satoori and challenging JHope to a fight of sorts.

13:27 - When Jin repeats that they got the question right, JK and JM do exactly the same as 12:45, but seated this time.

14:22, 14:36, 15:13 - In all three of these moments, JM nearly falls over laughing at something JK did that no one else found anywhere near as funny.

23:36 - When JK says he's good at this game, JM laughs and pokes JK in the chest with a marker.

BEHIND 2:30 - JM takes a selfie of him and JK with his personal phone while they're supposed to be paying attention to Jin.

6:35 - JK cheers on JM and calls him Jimin-ssi when JM announces he's doing well on this spot-the-difference round. When Jimin modifies the brag to say he only found four, JK says "that's still quite impressive."

Ep 113 “Dalbang School Part 2” (Ep: 5 / KM: 4)

4:50 - We all know how JK is when he gets into his "focus" zone, especially in a competitive environment. But here, when JM rather rudely interrupts JK's melodica practice, JK just starts playing around with him and giggles.

7:41 - As RM & JH take their turn, jikook are whispering to each other in the back row.

11:42 - After quickly agreeing on a lunch option, jikook do a high five / handshake thing and then JM says "we think alike" and "we get along pretty well." JK responds "that's exactly it" and the on-screen captions tells us they are a "good match."

22:20 - This is where JK and JM start switching back and forth carrying each other on their backs to get under a limbo stick.

They go again at 23:35, 26:11, and 28:13.

And again at 30:22 and 32:16 and 34:30 because, even though they lost, they want to try to do it again to show that they can as a "matter of pride."

25:00 - JK points something out to JM and then pats his butt.

33:33 - JM announces they lost, and then jikook do another handshake / high five thing.

34:33 - JM does an... interesting pose for the camera where he puts his hand on a bent-over JK's back and smirks.

34:56 - Yet another handshake and JM pats JK on the back when they finally pass the limbo challenge.

BEHIND 5:55 - While examining the limbo setup, JM comments that JK is good at this. JK comes over to give a demonstration and JM watches him be silly with it and says "he's a strange kid" fondly.

6:21 - Another jikook limbo attempt - this one was cut because they did it too easily.

Ep 114 “League of Number One Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 1)

The ones where BTS play games with League of Legends world champions

3:55 - After Jimin protests that he shouldn't be out, JK tells his hyung to turn around and face the back.

14:40 - JK fake-boxes JM after losing the hammer game.

18:18 - JK mimics Jimin's BWL intro.

Ep 115 “League of Number One Part 2” (Ep: 2 / KM: .5)

BEHIND

7:05 - JK comes over to check on Jimin's phone to make sure he's actually visible in the selfie the teams take.

Ep 116 “Team-Building Special Part 1” (Ep: 4 / KM: 1)

The ones with random games in that rec room-looking place that are a lot more fun than they sound

22:14 - JM and JK play around with the jump rope during breaktime.

22:26 - JM and JK play around like they're boxing with each other.

BEHIND 5:15 - JK appears to take an interest in watching JM's... back as he moves around acting out potential poses.

Ep 117 “Team-Building Special Part 1” (Ep: 4 / KM: 2)

5:30 - Despite showing pretty much everyone else touching everyone else in the pose guessing game, we don't get a single shot here or in the behind of JK feeling up Jimin. The above photo proves that it happened, though, so definitely side-eyeing the editors, here.

BEHIND 5:35 - JK keeps throwing water bottles when they're supposed to be taking a group photo. Jimin pulls him back next to him and puts an arm around his neck. JK puts an arm around Jimin's shoulders in return.

7:51 - After it's explained that JK is staying late to watch Jin do his penalty, a packed-up Jimin comes over and stands next to JK, waiting until they're done to leave.

Ep 118 “Photo Story Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 3)

The ones where BTS play a Samsung-sponsored game involving getting specific pictures while a spy tries to ruin the fun

4:22 - JM appears to direct JK to go punish Tae and pats JK's back when he starts to obey. Something happens that we don't see when the angle changes - next thing we see, JM seems to be pushing JK? JM then giggles at JK pretending to beat up Tae. (After this, JK spins around like a ballerina. Not jikook-related, just adorable.)

29:51 - JK calls Jimin twice without adding "hyung."

32:28 - JM pulls JK along by the wrist. Meanwhile, J-Hope once again mixes up their names.

32:44 - Though there is now a group walking slowly together and he doesn't need to pull him along anymore, Jimin takes JK's hand again.

37:02 - There are a bunch of seats open in the room, but Jimin walks over to sit right next to JK.

BEHIND 5:40 - When JM tries to steal a post-it from JK, JK scolds him in satoori banmal. JM calls him out for not calling him with hyung and JK quickly apologizes (in a way some k-army jikookers have said is like how a married person would respond to their nagging spouse!).

6:09 - JK and JM meet up and JK tells JM he's exhausted. There's a kind of weird moment that I fully admit I may be reading too much into where JK seems to be walking right towards JM, then abruptly stops and turns, looking at the camera, before walking with Jimin in a different direction than he had been heading. Then, JM says he thinks their matching shirts are hilarious and that it's funny they're wearing them for the show.

Ep 119 “Photo Story Part 2” (Ep: 4 / KM: 3)

8:21 - "You are me, I am you" moment: Jimin does a ballet spin the same way JK did in part one.

11:18 - JK is the only one to vote for JM to be able to keep a picture in other than Jin (who has nefarious reasons for doing so).

29:40 - JM goes over to help JK see how many of his photos the spy ruined and almost falls over laughing when it becomes clear it's nearly all of them.

34:21 - JM puts his hand on JK's shaking leg to help calm him (see above photo), but JK is so irritated that it doesn't work like it usually does. Poor bunny!

35:17 - JM pulls at JK's shirt and hand, then folds over his back while trying to get him to confess that he actually lost.

38:24 - JM has a comforting hand on JK's neck when he's acting upset about losing.

38:32 - When it seems like JK is struggling to come up with an ending statement, JM helps prompt him.

BEHIND

0:55 - JK talks about how amazing it is that Jimin found so many cards.

3:51 - When JK is playing with the sequin art on the front of his shirt, JM leans over and starts rubbing on them, too.

5:11 - Jimin tells JK that, if he wins, he's going to make the loser hike Mt. Achasan. JK asks why he's looking at him when he says that and they both laugh. Jimin pats JK's chest and they laugh even harder. Jin and Tae both have "omg, these two" looks on their faces.

Ep 120 “Reply BTS Village Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 2)

The ones with a real-life Mafia game inexplicably set in a 1970s village. It's... fairly difficult to follow, but the guys are into it and the outfits are great!

24:40 - Jimin breaks character and laughs when asking JK if he's the culprit.

29:40 - Caption: "The air is undeniably tense between Gamer Jeon and Chief Park." Not explicitly jikook, I just find it funny that the writers seem to be playing with some real life relationships, making sope best friends and jikook have tension that leads to banter...

BEHIND

5:34 - When Jimin is playing with the yo-yo, JK expresses concern that he's going to hurt his fingers (caption: Kook is just worrying for his hyung). Then, JK asks poutily and in banmal if he can play with the yo-yo multiple times and Jimins says no. Like, JK straight-up gives his hyung a command ("let me try that") using informal speech and no one bats an eye!

5:58 - Jimin starts singing a song about an ants. JK watches him. JK initially says to Hobi "look, he's a fool/dummy!" (in banmal again), then starts singing along. He jokes that JM doesn't know all the lyrics and Jimin says back "quiet, you."

Ep 121 “Reply BTS Village Part 2” (Ep: 3 / KM: 2)

38:48 - After having asked for it a bunch in the Behind of the previous episode, JK now has Jimin's yoyo.

non-jikook note: At the end of this one, they "time travel" to solve a mystery in Joseon-era Korea and I can't express how badly I want to see that. Please come back to that, Run!

BEHIND 0:58 - Jimin and JK play around accusing each other with exaggerated accents and formality. Jimin comes up behind JK and reaches out to touch his shoulder, but stops when Tae joins them and accuses them of plotting together.

9:05 - When JK says everyone else is so good at acting, Jimin compliments him that he was very funny towards the end.

[sanstropfremir]

would love to hear ur thoughts re. these street woman fighter's performances and who you would personally vote as the "better dance crew" in how they interpreted each other choreos and the song.

this was for their first elimination round (ep4) and it was interesting to hear from the judges + why they gave the points they did. (i'm not entirely sure if you're watching the show's episodes. they are roughly 2 hours long. so if you would like more context, pls let me know! i wrote brief comments underneath each one as well as the winners [spoilers ahead!]. assuming you are not: for this mission, each crew is paired with another crew and they have to choreograph one of the soloist songs. songs were "split" into two parts: part one [would be one song] and part two [another song]; one crew would choreograph one part and follow the other's crew choreograph for the other part.)

1. boa - eat you up (want choreo) + better (ygx choreo). dance crews: ygx vs want

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCfK_qWAhM0&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: ygx. boa gave 151 pts to ygx and 49 pts to want (the biggest gap in points between crews), sharing that although want choreographed eat you up, ygx was more cohesive (pointing to how want wore hats and it was messy). additionally, ygx had better stage presence and was able to capture the camera more. also, because ygx is the only crew to have a b-girl and use it in their routine, the judges applauded want for doing the best they can.

2. cl - doctor pepper (wayb) + hello bitches (prowdmon). dance crews: prowdmon vs wayb

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEEpZ9SrvaE&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: prowdmon. judges shared that doctor pepper's routine is a trademark of wayb and that they should have been the standout. however, they felt like prowdmon did it better.

3. hyuna - crazy (4minute) (coca n butter) + i'm not cool (hook) + lip and hip (hook). dance crews: hook vs coca n butter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1ikpPKEA30&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: hook. the two dance crews are VERY different in terms of style. coca n butter is described to be more hip-hop while hook is definitely more reflective of the current/newer trends. (when hook was first introduced in the show, they were known as the crew who was famous only for tiktok dances.) the judges shared that hook was more fun and interesting, given their stylistic choice of wearing the pink wigs. whereas it seemed for coca n butter, they felt like something was lacking (they showed something but it didn't feel they did.)

4. jessi - what type of xx (lachica) + nununa (holybang) + gucci (holybang). dance crews: holybang vs lachica

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtZzI11oyqc&ab_channel=MnetTV

winner: lachica. (this was the only battle where both crews came in v close pts. whereas for the other crews, there were huge point-gaps.) judges had a hard time choosing, sharing that for lachica they were more detail-oriented while holybang had better teamwork.

-

imo, i agree with the judges' choices. though i would have to say i think wayb did their routine (doctor pepper) better than prowdmon. they stood out to me then, but when it came to the second part (hello bitches), prowdmon was better. i loved lachica's performance - it was v clean + reminded me of something a kpop group would do (which like, the crew largely works with kpop acts like chungha, boa's better, etc. so it makes sense).

-

this was LONG. thank u if u do read it and post! i miss the kingdom "era" when u would post weekly reviews. the two are v different but this new mnet competition show is the only one i'm invested in. i'm not sure if it's big internationally? i know it is v popular in korea right now. while i've only seen i-fans talk about the show as it relates to chaeyeon (want) because she's an idol. - swf (streetwomanfighter) anon :]

omg this is so long and well organized, forget me writing reviews anon you should do it!! i'm not currently watching the full episodes but i've been catching the few clips that pop up in my youtube recommended occasionally, so i definitely don't have all the context but i'll take a crack at it!

ok so my assumption/from what i can tell, they have a bit of leeway to alter the competing group's choreo as needed to better suit numbers and formations. i also went and found the individual versions of these because why did they make them so small on the split screen, don't they know i'm old and wear glasses. also: MNET FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY STOP MOVING THE FUCKING CAMERA. WE DO NOT NEED SCROLLING VERTICAL BOOM SHOTS OF THIS. just keep the same lens at eye level it's really not that hard. this is like, one of the worst possible ways to shoot dance it is SO annoying. ok i'm done bitching about that let's go.

1. boa - ygx vs want i agree with the big point gap on this one, and i think want made a couple of choices that were not cohesive enough, and obviously they also got set up to fail by ygx. actually i think both groups made choices that were not particularly good, but ygx had more of the skills to back up what they were doing than want did. breaking is very difficult and requires a lot of upper body strength and a higher centre of gravity, which are two physical traits that are less common in women. personally i wouldn't have tried to break to better because although boa songs do have more of a beat than other idol music, it's still not at all the right type of music for breaking. it's gotta be fast, breakers rely on speed, because it's all about momentum; they're literally throwing themselves around the stage. here's the final from battle pro 2019 for example. the music is basically beats only; heavily lyric based music, like idol music, is bad for battling in general because there isn't a lot of consistency. i have more to say about this but i'm getting off track. basically by choosing to handicap the other team (because they don't have a bgirl at all) they shot their own bgirl in the foot because the song is too slow to properly show off her skills. i applaud want for making bold choices, like the hatwork and attempting the breaking, but ultimately when combined with their styling the performance looks disjointed. also they have some formation cohesion issues that make it look a bit like they'e struggling to keep up, even with their own choreo.

2. cl - prowdmon vs wayb i agree with the judges, i think prowdmon bodied the wayb choreo. i actually thought that was their choreo at first. they have the best presence that i've seen of all the groups and the performative "hard bitch" attitude fit in with their genre setting. wayb had several mistakes and synchronization issues that in my opinion made them look sloppy in comparision to prowdmon, who were sharper and had two more people to put into formations. 3. hyuna - hook vs coca n butter ok personally i don't like either of these choreos, but i'm agreeing with the judges here, i think hook's was the mildly more engaging. i can tell that they're very young and do mostly short form tiktok content because i see a lot of eye catching moves, but i don't see a lot of strong connective tissue between those moves. they have good ideas but they also really struggle with putting people into formation and balancing it out well. it doesn't help that they're a seven member crew going up against a four member one, so they have three extra people to figure out what to do with. there's a lot of empty space where there are members waiting in position for a group formation. it also doesn't help at all that they (mnet) appear to just be rawdogging the songs together without any kind of mixing, which is a huge detriment to groups that have to choreograph for two in their section. i'm not cool and lip and hip have two totally different feels and kudos to hook for at least trying to get them to at least visually be cohesive when mnet is go girl giving us nothing sonically. coca n butter has much more of an old school hip hop style, so putting these two up against each other was (probably a random lot draw) an interesting choice. personally i would have been more interested to see hook against want with the boa tracks and ygx against coca n butter with the hyuna tracks. however, i think the reason why coca n butter's stage felt like it was lacking is because they tried to emulate hyuna, without having the stage presence or the weirdness of hyuna. it feels like they're trying too hard and there isn't really any personal character in the piece, versus with hook, who embodied hyuna's weirdness a little more authentically and took a completely different direction. 4. jessi - lachica vs holybang lachica took this one easily, although their formations were a bit wonky for nununana, they covered it fairly well and i think they managed the best transition between songs (between nununana and gucci). they were sharper with good stage pictures and had a good gimmick with the double fringe on the gloves and hats. holy bang had some issues fitting their extra person into the what type of x choreo, but they did well with their own choreo. however, like with coca n butter and hook, because lachica took a new visual spin, this felt too derivative of jessi, so it wasn't that interesting for me to watch. i do think they are one of the groups on the stronger end of skills and presence. --- as far as visually what performances i liked the best, since would this even be a writeup by me if i didn't talk about design, here's a quick breakdown:

prowdmon - got some rudimentary setpieces, got a theme, got some fun variations on a uniform look; excellent for what i assume was limited budget capacity and also it's a dance crew show.

lachica - great continuity of effect in costuming with the fringe, and using the gloves as a mouth/lip effect was one of the most interesting choices of these routines.

hook - the pink wigs and the black latex on the checkered floor was a nice gimmick that was a bit of a nod to hyuna's weird without being too derivative. i'm not expecting a whole lot because these are dance crews but i think this was a decent amount of styling effort.

want - they made a bold choice with the hats and even though it didn't quite pay off for them i still respect it.

coca n butter/ygx/holybang/wayb - ygx and wayb did basic hip hop type styling and while it's absolutely fine, it's just boring. holybang went for a directly inspired jessi look, and although yes bodysuits, overall it wasn't that interesting either. coca n butter get props for doing a costume change and actually incorporating that into the choreo but it feels too much like it's trying to be hyuna weird with the caution tape strapped over their tits and asses.

---

as a final note/question to you, my lovely invested swf anon, what's the format of the show? are there stages like this every episode to review? if these were from the fourth one only, is there anything worth me reviewing in the first three? i'm not particularly interested in the aggressive competitive nature of the show and editing so i don't particularly want to watch the full two hour episodes, but if you think it's worthwhile for me to review stuff then i will. otherwise if there's a set structure (like with kingdom) i can seek out the stages specifically and review them if i know what i'm looking for.

[v-hope]

You're his celebrity crush and meet at an awards show

Pairings: OT7 x International Artist!Reader

Genre: Fluff, crack ig

Request: "hii ! i love your work and i've been having major feels with the boys at the bbmas so i was wondring if you could write a reaction for u being an artist they have a crush on and they meet you at an awards show and it's all cute and stuff?? 💜"

A/N: I really loved writing this! I'm just gonna do what I do with Shipping Material, for those of you who don't know hahah:

“English”

«Korean»

Kim Seokjin

“You know BTS?”

You couldn't help but giggle at the man's words, nodding your head right after, for there was really no other answer to that.

When you had gone to the restroom earlier that night, only to find people waiting outside of it because of how full it was, you had considered turning around and coming back some time later, but it just so happened that no other than Kim Seokjin had arrived two seconds after you, and had decided not to let his chance to talk to you slip away; even if he didn't have Namjoon to translate for him.

So now here you were, both of you not even bothering on lining up anymore, and instead moving aside not to block the way.

“Who doesn't know BTS at this point?” you answered after having uselessly tried to conceal your smile, raising one of your eyebrows and earning a proud yet shy smile from Jin. “You know Y/N?” it was your turn to cheekily ask.

He stretched his arms out before folding them over his chest as he leaned against the wall. “Ah, yes” he tried to play it cool, “very beautiful” he nodded like it was a fact, bringing immediate heat to your face, “voice… yeah” he emphasized, holding one of his thumbs up.

You gazed down in embarrassment, allowing another laugh to escape your throat – an action of yours he found to be quite adorable.

“I'd have to say the same about Kim Seokjin then” your eyes locked with his once more, ones that had sparkled at the fact that you actually knew his name. “10/10 vocals and looks”.

At that, he unsuccessfully tried to erase the smile that had already formed on his lips – his ears turning a furious red.

“Me? Oh, no” he denied, waving his hands in front of him, “no... you are best”.

Out of your mouth came what was a mix of a scoff and a laugh. “What? No way, hear me out–”

Who would've thought your first interaction ever would turn into a ‘no, you're better’ contest. At least you made him comfortable enough to fight you from the beginning.

Min Yoongi

“You mind if I join you?”

Yoongi's head snapped up at the sound of an unfamiliar voice, his eyes opening wide in shock when he realised he had no other than you in front of him.

Being too caught up in the sight of you, he could do nothing but absently shake his head, moving a little to the side for you to sit next to him.

“Why are you here and not inside?” you wondered in an attempt of making small talk.

“Um, air” he motioned around.

“It does get a little suffocating inside, huh?” you leaned back to take a better look at him.

He simply nodded his head, gazing down to his lap before a small smile took over his factions.

“You're sure I'm not bothering you?” you worried, noticing how quiet he was. “I didn't know you'd be here, I can leave if–”

“I'm just…” he interrupted you, looking up to lock eyes with you, “shy...” he admitted sheepishly.

Not only because he was insecure about his English, but also because it was you.

Your lips curved up as you stared fondly at him. “Okay then” you looked ahead, “let's just stay quiet for a while if that makes you feel better”.

So the two of you did just that; remaining silent for a little while, doing nothing but enjoy each other's company. Anyone who saw you would've thought it was such an awkward scene, but it was the complete opposite, actually. It was weird to find a stranger you could be so comfortable around with. It was nice, for both of you.

«Yah! Yoongi, we've been looking for you everywhere» the quiet atmosphere was disrupted faster than you'd have wanted to by Seokjin. “Oh, hello…” he awkwardly greeted you, receiving a smile from you before his eyes were back on Yoon. «They're announcing the Top Artist Award, come on!»

At the sound of that, Yoongi stood up immediately. “Sorry, I have to go, uh– award...” he spoke softly, almost scared of messing up his English.

Biting your lip, you squinted your eyes as you looked up at him. “Go get ‘em, tiger” you encouraged him with a grin, watching for the first time in person his signature gummy smile.

Thinking for a second before turning around to leave, he digged his hands in his pockets, staring down to you. “You don't... wanna come?”

“Um…” your eyes travelled from him to the door. “You know what? Yeah, I do” you stood up as well, a smirk forming on your lips before you added: “I don't wanna miss all the madness when you guys win”.

If you hadn't won him over already by being understanding about his shyness, with that vote of confidence you sure as hell had.

Jung Hoseok

“Y/N!” he enthusiastically shouted the answer he had been saying over and over every single time the interviewers asked them who they wanted to meet that evening.

Only this time you heard him.

Your head had snapped up at the sound of your name as you walked past them a few meters behind on the red carpet, looking around before your eyes locked with the guy's who was currently interviewing BTS.

“Y/N, hi!” he waved for you to go over there. “Come here, someone wants to meet you!”

Not only did you freeze at that invitation, but so did Hoseok, earning loud laughs from his members as you got closer to them.

“Hi, guys” you shyly greeted with a smile, receiving instant cheerful replies before you stood by Hobi's side, since Joon had stepped aside for you to be in the middle.

Hoseok's eyes were soon to lock with yours – a shy smile parting his lips as he quietly admired your factions, having you unconsciously do the same.

“So, J-Hope right here just told us he was excited to meet you” the interviewer informed you with a smirk, causing Hoseok to tilt his head and turn to his friends as he complained in embarrassment.

Your reaction, however, was something Hobi did not expect at all; for not only did your lips part in what the thought was the brightest, most beautiful smile he had ever seen on you, but you had also covered your face with your hands, letting out a giggle that was soon followed by one of his own.

“Ah, don't tell me that” you told the guy holding the mic in front of you, “he's my favourite, my heart just did a thing”.

«Did she, did she say I'm her favourite?» Hoseok turned to ask Joon with pouty, incredulous lips; later giggling like a little boy on Christmas when their leader confirmed his beliefs. «She did?!» he covered his smiling mouth with his hand.

“Aw, that's so cute!” the other guy gushed at your previous words, for neither of you had any idea of what Hobi's previous gushing had been about. “So you'll be cheering for him tonight?”

“Of course!” you turned to the seven guys. “I mean, I'll be chanting for all of you guys, but if you hear someone screaming ‘J-Hope’ at the top of their lungs, that's probably me”.

And later that night, when he did indeed hear someone screaming his name somewhere in the first rows during his part, his heart sped up uncontrollably, and not precisely because of all the dancing around.

Kim Namjoon

“Oh, f– I'm so sorry” he apologized as soon as his foot had stepped on your long dress, causing you to stumble over.

Luckily for you, just like he almost made you fall, he had also been the one to make sure to catch you – his hands being quick to hold you firmly by your arms, and staying there for a little longer so you could regain your balance.

“It's okay” you let him know with a shy smile, “I've been stepping on it all evening as well” at that, Joon exhaled the air he had been holding, gently letting go of you for once and for all. “It's such an awful, uncomfortable dress. I hate it”.

“Oh” he pursed his lips, eyeing up and down the dress he believed so perfectly hugged your body, “this might not help at all, but I think you look beautiful”.

It did help. Quite a lot, actually – that simple statement itself being enough for a shiver to run down your spine.

“Thank you” you replied, feeling yourself once again becoming shy. “I'm Y/N, by the way”.

“I know” he answered with an obvious tone, later letting out a breathy, nervous laugh, at the realisation of how he had exposed himself. “I um, I'm Namjoon”.

“I know” you repeated his previous words, biting down on your lower lip in response to his dimples showing up as he smiled.

Just like that, your manager called you from the other side of the hall, for you to go change into the outfit you'd be wearing for your performance.

“Seems like I'm finally getting out of this dress” your voice came out with a tone of relief, grabbing the sides of it and pulling it a little bit up so that you could walk properly. “It was nice getting stepped on by you, see you later!”

“It was my pleasure, I hope we can do this again sometime soon!” he played along as you walked away, smiling widely after watching you tilt your head back to let a laugh escape your throat.

Clumsiness? That he could always count on.

Park Jimin

Taehyung sneakily nudged Jimin as you got closer to greet him, for he had frozen on his place as soon as he heard you call them from the other side of the hallway – his eyes in absolute awe as he watched you hug his members one by one.

And when you finally got to him, he didn't really know which one of you was shaking more.

“Sorry” you apologized to all of them once you had pulled away from him, knowing well enough they had all noticed your body slightly tremble, “I'm really nervous, I'm a huge fan of you guys”.

A unison “aw” came out of their mouths.

“Don't be nervous” to everyone's surprise, it was Jimin the one to speak up first, with what you thought was the cutest of pronunciations.

“Yeah” Namjoon backed up his friend, “we're huge fans too, so we're just as nervous, to be honest” he laughed, making you laugh in a way that had Jimin staring with even more admiration.

“Yeah!” Jimin spoke up again, “your voice!” he paused, pressing his lips together and effusively nodding his head to let you know how much he liked it, bringing instant heat to your face as you blisfully thanked him.

He wanted to say something else, to talk more to you, but you were interrupted by your manager tapping your shoulder to hurry you up.

“Oh, um…” you looked around, “I wish I had more time but my performance's about to start” you stuck your lower lip out. “I just wanted to wish you guys the best of lucks later tonight, you're gonna kill it”.

“Ah, thank you!” they all answered once again, with grateful smiles.

“Wait, let's take a picture!” Joon proposed out loud after one of their staff members showed him a camera.

You didn't have to think even once before accepting, turning around to look in the same direction as them. On the other hand, Jimin didn't even try and stop his legs from moving closer to you in the middle, quietly asking Hoseok to move over and let him be by your side – placing his hand over your shoulders without getting to touch you as he smiled brighter than the camera flash itself.

And so when you turned around to say goodbye, he opened his arms to quickly hug you once more before you took off to the stage.

«Aw, she's so beautiful, how's that even possible» he gushed to his members, receiving multiple amused smiles when his smile turned into a pout. «Why'd she have to leave so soon?»

Little did he know that was far from being the last time you met each other.

Kim Taehyung

He was dying to talk to you.

The moment they were guided to their seats and he noticed one of them would be sitting next to you, he had rushed over there to claim it as his. However, just as much as he was dying to say something to you, his confidence was betraying him.

From time to time, he'd turn to you with the intention of starting a conversation in between performances, but nothing would come out of his mouth, turning his head in the opposite direction before he could make a fool of himself. You had said “hi” to each other already, why couldn't he bring himself to say something else?

It was when he noticed you were asking someone for some water, that he decided to take his chance – picking up the bottle of water under his seat to hand it to you.

“Have it” he spoke after your dumbfounded eyes travelled from the item to fix on his. “Is not… open…” his eyebrows knitted together as he looked up, wondering if he had managed to make his point clear.

An understanding smile curved up your lips, taking the bottle from his hands and thanking him before you opened it and took a sip.

Say something else. Tell her she looks pretty. Make small talk. Anything. He repeated over and over in his head, yet nothing came out. So, he smiled once more and turned his head back away from you, internally beating himself up for it.

It was you, later that night, the one who made his wishes come true; when you noticed how one of his members had taken away from him the popcorns he had been munching on, leaving him sulking with a pout on his lips.

“Here” you handed him yours, receiving a baffled expression from him. “You can have mine”.

In the end, what happened was that he did not take yours, but accepted to share them instead – leaning over to your side and finally relaxing next to you as the two of you ate and commented on the show, which lead to lots of laughter througout the night.

Never had he ever thought he'd thank Jeongguk for stealing his food.

Jeon Jeongguk

“Don't be so nervous” you tried to encourage him with a small smile, having his eyes move up from the paper note he was tightly holding to focus on you – a smile of his own curving up his lips as well.

“My English…” he begun, trying to translate the right words in his head, “is not... good”.

“It's pretty good, actually” you once again tried to make him gain some confidence.

Neither of you understood why they had settled things up this way – each one of the BTS members having to present an award with someone else, instead of doing it all together like they always did. In Jeongguk's case, he had been paired up with you, which is why here you were now, both of you sitting backstage, going over your dialogue a few times as you waited for your turn to come.

And he didn't know if it had been a blessing or a curse, for he had gotten to meet you, the one artist he had been crushing on for years… but, at the same time, there was a high probability of him messing up at some point and make a complete fool of himself in front of you.

“You know what?” you spoke after taking in his uncertain eyes. With a raised eyebrow, he let you know you had his attention. “If it makes you feel any better, I can make a fool of myself in front of everyone”.

His eyes opened wide. “W-What?”

“Yeah” you nodded your head, “I'll just mess up the words or something and then you'll have nothing to worry about!”

“No, no” he shook his head, holding his hands out as if to signal for you to stop. “You don't– have to…”

“Oh, I will do it, my friend” you raised an eyebrow in determination. “I already thought of it, there's no turning back now”.

That serious statement of yours managed to get a breathy laugh out of him.

You were his crush for a reason, but knowing you were willing to sacrifice your public image just to help him out with his nervousness? He might as well have fallen in love right then and there.

[lilchangbinnie]

Fic Recs ❀

okay so, dis gonna be my faves I’ve read recently with a variation of series, oneshots, smuts, fluffs, etc… None are mine, the url of the author will be by the title of the writing. Also, I'm a multifandom hoe so, I’ll try to have a mix of my favorite groups in the list, but for now its mostly exo and bts. Enjoy ya nasties xoxo.

about a girl (8 part series) - @rudeboywonho

dad!namjoon, CEO!namjoon, reader becomes his daughter’s nanny, a little angsty but also fluffly so is worth a read and his daughter is such a gem

vibrations (M) - @seokvie

sub!jimin, ass play, vibrating butt plugs, hot as shit… I’m sweating

owned (12 part series) - @ibangtanthings

reader marries cold rich namjoon to save her family but in the time being, they both get to warm up to each other slowly, angsty at first but has a really heartwarming ending

zipper (M) - @jiminniemouse

bestfriend!jungkook, this boy convinces the reader to watch porn with him and you already know how this ended, obviously smut

buzz (3 part series) (M) - @floralseokjin

it all starts with yoongi bursting into the reader’s room when they were about to masturbate with their new vibrator, smutty as heck

aquiver (3/9 part series) (M) - @floralseokjin

after many attempts to orgasm by himself and failing, yoongi follows namjoon’s advice and goes to a sketchy place for his solution and there he finds the reader

spill the tea - @jae-bummer

reader talks about her feelings about jooheon to his members and he overhears the conversation, cute and funny, kinda short but it’s still one of my faves

where is my mind (M) - @tayegi

werewolf!hoseok, can’t handle himself when he sees you because of his heat but you don’t seem to mind, cute ending

for a good time, call: the horndog (M) - @tayegi

lengthy jimin smut, sex in the studio, hilarious ending

cabin (M) - @krismebaobei

you spend most time with jongin in your stay in the cabin with exo and this makes Chanyeol a bit jealous but when y’all get a moment alone, you let him know you are his, plus a funny ending

class president (M) - @btssmutgalore

“class president candidate jimin would do anything to get your vote” fuck.

captain (M) - @suho-mochi

footballplayer!suho, basically his team loses the game, he’s frustrated and fucks the reader against the lockers, hot shit

sin city (10/? part series) (M) - @btssmutgalore

reader applies and gets a job at sin city, her sweet and dangerous moves make the owner jimin break some of his own rules because of his attraction to her, 10/10 would recommend to anyone in the kpop fandom, favorite series ✩

pop up - @yeolology

teleportor!jongin, you have seen the same boy pop in and out of your life twice and you are devoted on finding him, and you do

watch me (M) - @taecup

jungkook x reader x taehyung, hot as shit, bitch I’m quaking

neither innocent nor guilty (M) - @won-heol

lawyer!wonho, infamous prosecuter Mr.Shin has his eye on the reader during court and he can’t wait to get his hands them even if he just lost the case to her, dAMn

castaway (M) - @kpopfanfictrash

airplane crash au, you’re stranded with Jongin after being the only survivors of the accident and learn how to live with eachother but feelings get caught up in the middle, smut torwards the end, amazing plot

a good day to save lives (4/? part series) - @mxn-yoongi

bts doctor au, nonsense but its pretty funny nonsense, reader is an intern along with jungkook and taehyung while the rest are mostly doctors in different areas

safeguard (3 part series) - @thesammtimes

plushie!jongin, very unique and cute plot, I dream of this happening to me

no strings (10 part series) - @kpopfanfictrash

fuck buddy jimin, from friends with benefits to lovers, fluff ending but has smut throughout the story obviously

nerves (M) - @tayegi

thanks to an experiment the reader’s nervous system is emerged with kim taehyung, weird ass plot but I think its cool, its funny too tbh

higher (9/? part series) - @3kpop2jagi1

really good story, it doesn’t help that i’m suho biased, yixing is my favorite character in the story and if you read it, you’ll know why

taken (11/? part series) - @kimjongdaely

i started reading and now I’m desperate to see how it continues, gangleader!suho, harsh themes & much angst, stockholm syndrome?

go with it (M) - @rapmonluv

sub!namjoon, he expected to have you in the palm of his hand but by the end of the night it turned to be the way around, i need a large holy water after this and you’ll do too

perverted bunny mask (13/? part series) - @btsinned

assassins au, harsh themes (murder, psychopathic tendencies, sexual harassment, etc…) very interesting tho i was waiting for that smut with jungkook

a cinderella story (1/? part series) - @1honeypot

fratboy!yoongi, while you struggle with your crush in real life, little did you know you were sexting him via adult chat

across the hall (3/? part series) - @the-porcelain-doll-xo

neighbour!chanyeol, reader gets tired of her sister pairing her with guys so she lies about having a bf and now is faking a relationship with her cute neighbour

meddling (M) - @ffsjjk  

for once you are grateful for your best friend taehyung and his meddling because it brought you to this gentleman named park jimin 

sexting (M) - @lilyjhs

sex over the phone, you had known jimin in real life as a fuckboy, n u t

who are you? - @8bityeol

reader becomes invested on the anonymous letters of a fan and wants to find him, “happy delight”, the reader is a thriller book writer, I want a mango slaw

rent-a-boyfriend - @jimlingss

your friend hoseok literally rents you a boyfriend for a month to change your dull mood but he isn’t even your type, very fluffly/creative plot

la douleur exquise (M?) - @cinnaminsvga

incubus!yoongi, you summon a demon just for funs and now he’s stuck in the ground half naked and he’s obligated to stay with you until he sexually satisfies you, read it even if you aren’t a yoongi stan, this had me laughing so hard

handmade gold - @btsxexoxtrash

soulmates!jongin, in a world full of people with their true love, you and your boyfriend go against the odds and continue dating and as he finds his soulmate, everything gets tougher but not all hope is lost, angsty fluff, its really good I promise

camera (M) - @exostace

the reader is a cam girl and her friend sehun wants to help her but when practicing what to do when the camera is on, things get hOT, I imagined this very vividly in my mind and I am fukked

temptation (M) - @exostace

fuckboy!chanyeol sends you a dick pic because he got hard thinking of the time you  sucked his dick in Baekhyun’s room, n u t

new nEw NEW!

hey, neighbor - @whimsical-ness

neighbor!baekhyun, reader falls for him, it’s pretty cute

she’s testosterone (2 part series) - @jimlingss

yoonji/yoongi, crack fic, you’re bestfriends with yoonji but later you realise yoonji has a dick, slight smut sprinkled at the end

on the verge (M) - @xhixtape

yoongi suggests the idea of being submissive for once and you both play with the roles, h o t, straight up smut without plot

fantasy (M) -  @xhixtape

optional male bias, reader plays with their bias, cockring and teasingggg

quivering, whimpering (M) - @xhixtape

bestfriend!jungkook, he convinces you to help him out since you like being dominate already, he’s willing to be a good boy for you

 FIC RECS 2 (I made another list)

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

So,apparently there was some thing wrong with the satellite receiver ... Not the missle ... Although Kim Jong-Un has been making plans for a replica that will work right with no interference...

While the leader of North Korea worked with the original information from 2002 that I wrote while I was pregnant...

Okay 1st let me say we all know I'm not a coward. 2nd let me say we all know i am very angry. 3rd let me just say when pregnant shit gets intensified by 9000%

Okay. So in Kim Jong-Un's work he uncovered that the missle isn't inaccurate. There's a specific satellite that actually works with my GPS coordinates, in case i am making last minute deals with qE2 and i don't get dust in my eyes when she's blasted and i can expell her secrets from her brain as fast as possible.

Which everyone has known that informational coding... But the way it's worded sounds like I don't like fighting around me and it sounds like i don't know how to protect my kid. Because people read my writings with an attitude and mind set to protect me. Not that I'm giving militant orders like i can rule the world and no one know.

Like literally "Sabrina would kill No one and she would never order that and so we need to work arounf her to protect her because she doesn't know how to do it herself"

When i clearly state, "i will do Any thing to protect my kid, remove me and the battle will commence"

Like who built the missle?

"Yeah you called it a batteryless missle and Kim Jung-On called you and told you. Okay i built it how do i make the missiles and you say it's a Care Bear invention. Yeah fuck you, yes we're gonna go around you! Because he went and told Every body you were insane!"

And yet the proof is in the pudding and im still stuck here for Christmas and they're putting Every one in danger! Duh.

So but i began to write to make fun of William... I got interrupted to prove my point and let Wiliam know "United They Stand"

And so I tell William where have you been the last two nights that allowed this creep to be all up on me? And I word it as running around being a tramp.

And he's all "if you call creating a satellite being a tramp"

And then Matt informs me there was nothing wrong with the satellite initially but i got into a fit of rage because no one would tell me my husband was dead or who he was and so I used a comet to break it on purpose and called New Mexico nothing but hoes and cunts

"Lets continue, but i was wrong" says Matt now.

And so I had asked William where he had been the last 6 years. And he was all "there was shit you had me do that I didn't want to do Because I told you it would take me 9 long ass years but you insisted because you had deep PTSD and you said people needed individual therapy because you did and you wouldn't get it so thats what i been doing when other people were fucking with you and you wouldn't interrupt their therapy to help yourself belittle others. You said you could do it all on your own"

And so there was always the blame of time in confusion. Why it's taken so long and I said we just had to wait for the right President.

And then im told the DNA system has only been in effect for the last two years "because of This" and I'm directly pointed at. Which is quite funny. I'm much too much to be a you.

And a little about the electoral votes... Russia was the one country that unanimously elected Uncle Donald to be President. -- the United Nations uses diplomats from other countries to vote for the President. The President represents us but the President interacts internationally. So the entire world gets to vote who they want to play with.

This is why every Russian Diplomat voted in Uncle Donald:

Because Russia used to be the USSR in the pre-1990s.

As many people can grasp I learned of the eQ2 shortly after my dad disappeared in 1986. I was 2, almost 3. People like Lucas told us the truth and attempted to save us. And did. And i fought her because she came down to learn why we kept being obtrusive so she could gain control.

But luckily i had a twin that was so angry that his dad was gone he began flushing every non Darth Vadar toy he had down the toilet because all he wanted was his dad.

And earlier today he was doing reps with weights in case he had to beat up William for being a tramp. Just in case.

And i had a mom that loved me. And a whole neighborhood full of people that had relatives nearby. Like Alex Laughlin in our trailer park and Channing Tatum that was relocated a few towns less than an hour away. Our trailer park was primarily military families that worked the river.

So my brother in his anger couldn't deal with the bitch. My mom in her horror and sadness needed protection. That left me.

In my house I was alone. Sadness of my family and friends bathed me like the miracle waters of Truth or Consequences heals, their tears and heaviness of their heart fed me strength.

I knew i had to do anything, like Lucas to help save the little Alabama town.

I saw how my brother would upset my mom because he would flush brand new toys down the commode but when i told her the story line and he recreated it for her with a new toy, she laughed and i saw her heavy heart lift and be able to live and be my mom again for a few more days. Days we didn't expect to have. Because we became accustomed to a sad and depressed mom.

I saw how he could be bad but I could explain it to her later and we could be a small without a dad normal family. And talk with each other.

So one day while Care Bears was on and i did my usual sitting across from my mom staring at her while she read and cried to analyze her emotions to see if she would be mom after she put down her book. To see how much work I'd have to put in to see my family and the sun shining on them, i was reminded of Lucas. I was reminded of Channing who was taken away by standing up to eQ2 and I began kneeling in front of the TV every time the Care Bears blasted love and protection from their tummies.

And my little twin Brother Matt Hagan began filling his stomach up with tension and telling me he could too. And so he and Alex Laughlin went round the neighbourhood teaching about the Care Bears and how we could fix everything if we just cared. And so people would literally bend over backwards all the time.

To enhance their stomachs to show we were United. And we would not fail. United in Silence. United in suffering. United in the fight.

So i told my mom one day while she was smiling and reading. "Mom i have to help save you but i have to lie. But I'll only tell you the truth"

"Samantha don't you dare lie to good people"

"Mom, let me watch the TV and I'll decide"

And i cried. I was scared.

"Mom. I only told you that because Darth Vadar said i should. But i don't know how to lie and not only tell you the truth but to tell everyone else. I don't know its safe"

She laughed "Darth Vadar, huh? You mean your dad. I can hear him, too. Next time she comes to town. I'll invite her here for tea and ill see you in action"

No. But she prepared it all then went to town and left me alone with her, the neighbors all on high alert and ready to pounce if I left the house with eQ2. And I bequeathed the eQ2 on my own and finished up what my mom had prepared and served it in the kitchen where there was less Windows but a man standing on his car and 2 others on their houses across the dirt road to watch for me. And I sat in front of the open window knowing I just had to push out the screen and jump out and I would be safe And i could pretend to fall out and kick and punch the screen in my panic of "falling" as suggested by a neighbor. As long as I didn't hear mom's car i wouldn't get hurt much.

And so thats how at the age of 2 I infiltrated the eQ2's circle because of Channing Tatum and my dad and the unbearable sadness I saw daily.

And heroes like Lucas and attempted heroes like Channing and the town's bravery and support.

I learned to Sleigh. Sit back and ride the ride, controlling the reigns with delight. And fear. Dread.

Each meeting i took the heaviness in the air around me and put it in me as much as possible. All the Care Bear sadness not in their belly but their hearts and minds and the rest i hid around me, under the table, under my shirt, in my hair.

Then every time she left i measured the heaviness to see how good of a job I did. Nearly every time it was light enough to easily dance a jig.

Merry Christmas to All, once and for all!

So this shirt... Its me hugging my mom to make her feel better about my crazy Darth Vadar loving brother sneaking up behind her chair to check on her and not to check if he was in trouble, but to hear her laugh

Its me hugging my mom while my brother Matt is in the bathroom flushing his toys or taking a nap and all his dreams come true when our dad comes in behind us, says the desiger Jesse James whom also used to live in the trailer park. Whose dad used to kill the kidnappers.

Not that my mom is fat or waddled. But as adults saw everything in black and white, couldn't fly or run like we could due to paralyzing sadness. But had full unbranded Care Bear tummies just like the rest of the neighborhood.

And my dad sneaking up has a Darth Vadar helmet on his tummy for representing all human trafficked dad's.

We decided mom would get an open book and a magic wand for hers because she became a high school teacher and she always drowned her sorrows in an open book she read that took her away to a life that filled her with imagination and other worlds.

Merry Christmas, mom. From Jesse and all the team.

..

I'll come back with Russia after i eat.