#and when you have anxiety about anything reassurance as great as long as its true
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Still crying because I threw up yesterday night after my girlfriend reassured me I wouldn't multiple times 🥲
#'stop overreacting' shut up i have a phobia#and when you have anxiety about anything reassurance as great as long as its true#now im never gonna trust her about this again#not mad at her btw she is the actual best person to ever live#however#it just reminds me that this really is something outside of everyones control#theres nothing anyone can do#and that makes the phobia worse#also having flashbacks about the event that gave me the phobia so thags fun /s ���#it was the worst day of my life fr#i seen fine but only because the relief i feel after something traumatic is like some sort of dissociative high#idk how to explain it to anyone who hasnt felt it themselves but yeah
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
unwanted feelings
james potter x reader
description - You'd had a crush on James Potter for years and when he kisses Lily Evans in front of you, you are heart broken. Later you find that he didn't actually feel as you expected and he explains himself.
warnings - some angst, unsure reader, fem pronouns, self doubt, negative self talk, not eating for a day cause reader is avoiding someone
word count - 2800
A/N - so this one isn't my best work by far but i wrote it so looks like its getting posted. i don't know why all of my reader inserts lately are so fem and sort of bubbly, i guess it's sort of what i'm aiming for for myself right now but i'm sorry if it maybe isn't coming off as relatable.
MASTERLIST
Your throat tightened in anxiety as you watched James zoom around the pitch. He was reckless when he was playing quidditch and it was one of the things that made him great at the game and an excellent captain. It was also the thing that nearly gave you a heart attack every time you watched him play. You went to every one of his games and you always wore something of his with his colors when you were in the stands. You were stood up on your seat and a slightly bored looking Remus sat to your right, reading from a book you didn't recognize. You'd thought that Sirius playing would be enough to keep him interested but sports was just not something he enjoyed watching. You were usually that way as well but whenever James was playing, suddenly you were the most intent spectator in the stands.
You were more worried than you should have been. More worried than what was appropriate for a friend to be. That's what you were, friends. That had been reinforced many times by the shaggy haired boy and you tried desperately to get it through your head before you embarrassed yourself one of these days. Sometimes though, you just couldn't help it.
Really you might have thought he reciprocated if you didn't know any better. You often got comments on what an attractive couple you guys were but each time it was quickly corrected by James. Normally along the lines of 'Oh god no, we are just friends. Purely platonic' , sometimes followed by a shudder or a gag even. It upset you every time to no end but you played along. You rarely, if ever, contributed to the shooting down of any feelings but that was never noticed by the man you had feelings for.
You'd had a crush on him since you were probably in your second year and now you were coming to the middle of your seventh. There were a million times that you almost said something but every time there was a reminder that you were not the one he had eyes for. It usually took the shape of disgust at the thought of dating you or commentary as he pined over the Evans girl who you felt you could never compete with. How could you when she was just perfect. You saw her to the left of you as she stood in the stands as well and your hands shook with insecurity before looking back toward the game. Your heart raced nearly as quickly as James did around the pitch and you prayed that the snitch would be caught soon so that you could get rid of the stress surrounding you. You felt a hand on your right shoulder and you looked over to find Remus had stood and was looking at you caringly.
"Are you alright, Y/N?" He asked softly and you tried your very best to soften your gaze and calm your stance so you appeared less concerned with someone that you shouldn't have that much interest in in the first place.
"Of course I am. When am I not?" You smiled before looking out at the pitch.
"When youre watching the guy you're in love with play a dangerous game that you don't like." He stated simply in response to the question you meant to be rhetorical and your eyes widened.
"I don't know what youre talking about." You nearly whispered and Remus smiled.
"I'm not gonna tell anyone Y/N but its not exactly subtle. It probably doesn't help that I know the look on your face because it's how I feel too watching Sirius play." He was still smirking but your anxiety was far from eased.
"Oh god, does he know?" You asked scaredly, terrified that the answer would be yes and you would have to stop spending time with him.
"Shockingly, no." You sighed out in relief but Remus continued. "You should tell him though or else he might end up moving on."
"What do you mean? There's nothing for him to move on from. Everyone knows he's in love with Evans and he has made it pretty clear that he is opposed to being anything more than a friendly relationship with me." You choked out, struggling with the words leaving your lips but knowing them to be true.
"I mean he has a minor crush on Evans but it's nothing compared to the annoyingly huge crush he has on you. He's probably just overcompensating for the fact that he's insecure and doesn't want you to reject him."
"Why are you telling me this?" You asked sincerely. You were friends with Remus as you were with the rest of the marauders but it was nothing compared to the friendship they held within their group. You knew Remus was more loyal to James than to you so you couldn't understand why, if it was true, Remus would be telling you at all.
"Because he is trying desperately to move on seeing as he is under the impression that you aren't into him and I'd hate to see him throw something away that could be really good for him." Remus smiled gently and you looked at him gratefully.
"I really appreciate you telling me and all but I just don't think I can believe you. I can't even count how many times he has made a big show of not liking me. I love him too much to ruin what we have and I know that if I confessed and it went bad that I would lose him all together. I would rather have him in my life in a way that hurts than not have him in it at all." You stated sadly and Remus sighed but nodded in understanding.
"I get it but just know that I'm being honest and pretty soon he is going to give up on it. I just want to see you both happy but if its too big of a leap, I understand. That's exactly the excuse he tells the rest of us too."
Suddenly cheers erupted from the stands, cutting your conversation with Remus off as everyone ran to rush the pitch. The snitch had been caught and gryffindor won. You were excited for James but you were also a little terrified to walk onto the pitch to see him with the now conflicted thoughts running through your head. Your thoughts were stopped by the image in front of you which was causing the whole crowd to cheer. James had pulled Lily Evans into a kiss in his excitement and your heart stopped. You felt nausea rise in your throat and Remus caught your eye with a sympathetic look. You didn't look at him for longer than a second and you ran off the pitch with tears streaming down your face. You found your way up to your dorm, pushing yourself to get there quickly before the common room filled with students celebrating their victory. James was always one to love attention so he would be getting crazy after the game which he did just about every time they won.
When you made it to your bed, you hurried under the covers, throwing the shirt you were wearing which belonged to James onto the floor. You felt your heart clench at the despair you felt. You wanted to be upset at Remus for getting your hopes up but you knew he was sincere in his want to help. Still you felt that you would probably not be able to face James in the weeks to come. Maybe, given a little time, you could be around him and not be upset at the world for taking away your chance with him. As you laid in your bed, you stared at the ceiling. You felt tears streaming down your face and you grew angry at yourself. He didn't owe you anything, he wasn't into you. That wasn't his fault and it was so unfair of you to expect anything more from him when your feelings were not his responsibility.
You weren't sure how long you laid there but you could hear the party start and end in the common room. It must have been late. Sleep wouldnt come though, you could just feel your heart continue to break and you were stuck in a loop of self pity. You made the decision that the following days would be spent away from James if you could at all help it. That was probably what he wanted anyway and it was the only way that you would get over the pain you were feeling. At some point your roomates entered your dorm and sleep overtook you for a few restless hours.
When you woke up, the sun was barely on the rise. You hurried up and got dressed and ready. You were planning on getting to breakfast early to avoid running into any of the marauders. You found your plans were not going how you wanted when you entered the great hall to find a head of red hair next to a mop of black. Your throat tightened and you quickly moved to turn and head out of the great hall. You heard a familiar voice call your name but you rushed out before you could give it too much thought. You knew that if you let him try to convince you, you would end up having a very upsetting breakfast with your best friend and his new lover. You would rather avoid breakfast.
Throughout the day, avoiding James was proving to be harder than you had thought it would be. You had many of your classes with him and you even sat next to him in a few. He was insistently trying to get you to open up about why you were suddenly so closed off to him but you remained shut off, reassuring him that nothing was wrong and you were just a little tired from the game the day before. You avoided lunch for the same reason as you had avoided breakfast and you felt yourself starting to get a bit lightheaded. Your afternoon was spent avoiding James but soon he was preoccupied with Lily anyway.
You were hid in a corner of the library when a cough alerted you of someone's presence. You looked up to find the very eyes you hadn't wanted to see.
You pushed it down with a gulp and smiled a bit at him, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay but they were growing harder to hold back after keeping everything pent up all day. It probably didn't help that you were hungry and therefor a bit more emotional. You could feel the tears sitting in your eyes, waiting for something to go wrong so they had an excuse to escape you.
"I don't know what I did wrong." He mumbled while looking at the floor in front of you and you took a deep breath.
"There's nothing wrong James, I promise. It's just been a long day." You smiled and your heart picked up speed.
"Since when did we lie to each other?" He questioned and your heart stopped. You were left unsure how to respond.
"Since the truth would cause more damage than good." You spoke honestly. At this he looked up at you and your eyes met. A tear left you and James immediately moved to comfort you but you tried to move away, standing quickly to evade him. You regretted it as spots filled your vision, the lack of food catching up to you. You know that you turned a bit green for a moment because James looked slightly scared.
"Y/N I dont know whats wrong but you look like you should be getting to the hospital wing. You don't look well."
Before you could answer you felt your vision blacken and your legs give out before your consciousness left you completely.
When you woke up, you knew you were in the hospital wing. It smelled sterile and the bed was stiff underneath you. When you started to wake madam pomfrey came to check on you.
"You can't go around with an empty stomach like that again, do you hear me?" She scolded, though her eyes were soft. You nodded solemnly. "I was alerted that you hadn't been to the great hall to eat all day, you have to know that isn't good for you. I'm gonna have a prefect watch out for you the next couple days to make sure you're eating at meal times. Understood?" She asked again and once more you nodded before leaning back and sighing. You looked at your surroundings and were surprised to see the black haired boy next to your bed fast asleep. Your heart took off again and you felt trapped by your environment. As anxiety swirled around in your chest, James had woken up a bit.
"You're awake." James sighed, laced with relief. You still wouldn't make eye contact with him. You felt the bed dip as he sat on it and you looked up to watch him put his head in his hands as he leaned over. You felt guilt fill your chest more than it already had from hating that you felt any claim over the man in front of you. You knew you were in the wrong and the last thing you wanted was to cause him any pain. "Remus talked to me." He almost whispered.
At that moment, you wished you could have apparated to anywhere else in the world. You looked back down at your lap and tears were once again brought to your eyes. You felt betrayal that Remus would reveal your feelings to James.
"I'm sorry." You apologized and you fiddled with your fingers.
"Why are you the one apologizing, I'm the one whos behaved poorly." He assures and you shake your head.
"That's not fair to yourself. You're allowed to want to be with whomever you want and my feelings should have no effect on that. You've made it clear for years that you weren't interested in me and it is my fault that I couldn't take a hint. I'm so sorry." You gushed out and tears started to fall from your eyes. You felt James get up from your bed and you prepared him to leave but instead you felt arms wrap around you and a kiss came to your head.
"Y/N I have had feelings for you for years. I was just always too scared for myself to even consider that you might feel the same." He whispered out but you felt only a different kind of pain. Even though he had now admitted his feelings, he was still dating Lily. Not you. Almost as if he could hear your thoughts he spoke quietly. "I broke it off with Evans." You pulled away immediately.
"What? Why would you do that?" You asked quickly and before he had a chance to answer you feared the worst. "Oh god is it because of me? James please dont let my feelings have any bearing on who you want to date, I can't stand the thought of being the reason you broke up. Even if we do have feelings for each other, you deserve a chance with Lily if that's what you want."
"It was mutual, actually. She understood that I had feelings for you and she said she had a crush on someone else. It just seemed like I had kissed her a bit rashly on the quidditch pitch and we agreed that we shouldn't have gotten together in the first place. It was only a day anyway." He reassured as he explained himself and you calmed a bit.
"So what does this mean." You got out, almost inaudibly.
"It means that, if you'll have me, I'd like to take you out on a date." He stated as if it were the simplest thing in the world and you almost couldn't believe your ears. Before you were even thinking you were nodding quickly, causing spots to once again fill your vision and James grabbed your shoulders to stabilize you before you both laughed. He pulled you by your shoulders toward him and he caught your lips in a kiss that somehow expressed all of the years of repressed feelings. When he pulled away he smiled at you and sat back on your bed. He spent the rest of the day with you in the hospital wing talking about all of the places he was going to take you in the coming weeks.
#harry potter imagine#harry potter x reader#hp imagine#hp x reader#the marauders#marauders imagine#marauders x reader#marauders era#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter imagine#james potter fluff#harry potter fluff#james potter angst#hp angst#hp fluff
634 notes
·
View notes
Text
Shadowed Rationale
Characters: Albedo, Childe, Diluc, gn!reader
Word Count: 3,597
Warnings: Swearing
Premise: Some things aren’t terribly rational. And some responses are even less so. But what other option is there? Revealing yourself can be a terribly embarrassing thing, isn’t it better to hide it?
In which the reader is afraid of the dark.
Author’s Note: I’ve decided to write based off my own prompt every two weeks. Mostly because I realized I can no longer think of ideas, and also cause I’m a bit writer’s blocked and I’d feel bad writing requests right now. This premise is pretty cheesy, but sometimes simple starting points are the best to build upon! Besides it was a really a chance to work on my atmosphere, sometimes putting an image in your mind on paper is quite difficult, especially when it comes with an unsettling sort of mood.
All the characters I chose are characters I saw at least some point in the 1.4 teaser stream (Kaeya, Xiao, and Zhongli are tomorrow). I’m so excited! Although I have to apologize to Venti, sorry I have no idea how to write you so I chose not to.
I realize I idealize some of these characters (ie: Childe) quite a bit. I hope that they still keep their individuality, that they still stay in character. That being said I’m quite happy with how this turned out to be, so I hope you like it.
Albedo
It’s not that you didn’t trust Albedo. Indeed Albedo sometimes felt like the only person in the world you could trust.
It was simply that, though you two had been in a relationship for the past four months or so, you still wanted to impress him in some way. Or at least not seem like a total idiot. And to you the most idiotic thing you could think of was your fear of the dark.
It wasn’t that it was a totally irrational fear, of course humans were afraid of the dark, how else could they have survived this long? It was more that the fear felt irrational now. And besides, you had a vision. Your partner had a vision. You two were more than equipped for anything that might be lurking in the shadows. Besides it’s not as if your fear had a tangible image in your mind. It was more like a cloud, a miasma, which filled you with anxiety.
You knew you should tell him, knew he’d be nothing less than a perfect gentleman about the matter. But your pride was too great, or perhaps it was your embarrassment. Either you said nothing. And here you were now, in Wolvendom, in the middle of the night, desperately trying not to jump at every shadow you passed.
Albedo wasn’t paying the slightest bit of attention to your nervous disposition; once he’d found something to experiment with he developed the slightly unhelpful habit of blocking the rest of the world out completely. Not that that was terrible for you in current circumstances. Maybe you’d make it out of here with your dignity intact.
That optimism however was drowned out by the oppressive anxiety you felt. Though Albedo had assured you that his connections had managed to get Razor’s promise that no wolves would bother the two of you it was still difficult to contain the shiver up your spine every time you heard their distant howling. The landscape didn’t help, comprised of sharp drops and trees which seemed as if they’d never been alive in the first place. The long cavern in which you two walked seemed too vulnerable, too low to the ground with no way to protect yourself either from behind or above. The valleys were crawling with hilichurls, and you’d occasionally see the silhouette of a wolf or two. You could make out the old Monstadt as well, if you gazed westward, and the solitary, crumbling turret cut an eerie figure against the inky sky.
As Albedo studied the lamp grass that was the reason for your expedition – as he’d developed a curiosity in regards to their luminescence, how it was created and how it might be extracted and experimented upon – you looked around you. Though there was nothing in sight to be afraid of you still found yourself going to draw your weapon, though you were loath to actually do so, not wanting to look silly. After all, only a fool would attack the dark.
Luck, however, wasn’t on your side. You seemed to be spotting a figure, appearing at the other side of the valley in which you’d found yourselves in, walking straight towards you. You blinked rapidly, brain desperately trying to choose between whether or not it was a figment of your imagination. Surely it must be? What sort of cloaked figure would be wandering around in the dark? And yet the other half of your mind whispered that it must be something, something or someone, and that something or someone was fast approaching you. Was it? Or were you just imagining it? You truly couldn’t decide. Another howl echoed on the wind. Your senses were becoming too overwhelmed, too confused. Oh why were you there? Why oh why oh why?
You backed up slightly, brain now determined to see the shadow on the horizon as a human. Your hand clutched your weapon and you tried to remember if there was something, anything behind you. A ridge perhaps, so you might not have to worry about what was behind you, might be able in some ways to ground yourself.
Unfortunately luck wasn’t on your side, and instead of finding some point of security you found yourself tripping over your partner.
“Shit.” Albedo let out a curse as you fell backwards, hitting the ground with a loud thud. “My love are you alright?”
You said nothing, instead glancing back towards the other end of the valley. The figure seemed much skinnier from the ground, and for a moment you felt your brain cloud over in confusion. Then, as if all of a sudden your mind had put the pieces together, you felt a rush of relief, swiftly followed by embarrassment. A trunk. It was a tree trunk. Covering your face with your hands you groaned.
“Beloved?” Albedo asked once again. You looked up at him, a feeling of sheepishness and fondness washing over you as you saw the worried expression on his face.
“It’s nothing Albedo, I’m perfectly fine. It’s just… ah,” you let out a sigh, steeling yourself for the interaction you’d specifically hoped wouldn’t happen, “I’m, I’m afraid of the dark. My eyes were playing tricks on me just now, I thought I saw someone walking towards us. But it was just a tree.” You let out an embarrassed sort of sound, once more burying your face in your hands. Damn it. Now what were you going to do?
The feeling of fabric around your shoulders was a surprising one, and you quickly looked up. Albedo was crouching down beside you, having wrapped his coat around you. There was no sense of shame or embarrassment in his eyes, only love and a sense of caring.
“You should’ve told me.” He said, voice soft and warm. “I’m sorry I brought you along when it makes you so uncomfortable.”
“I’m sorry I’m being such a pain,” you replied, “it’s such a stupid fear of mine. That’s why I didn’t tell you. I felt like, like you’d think I was being irrational. Like I was being silly.”
“There’s nothing irrational about being afraid of the dark my love. It can be frightening after all, not being able to use all your senses to their full capacity. And even if it were an irrational fear, I wouldn’t look down on you for it. Alchemists, those who study the world, they cannot expect to always interact with what is perfect, what is always rational or what always makes sense. Neither are they infallible themselves. Besides,” he continued, brushing your hair out of your face, “I’d rather you be cautious over nothing than see you hurt.”
You found yourself unable to say anything, overcome by his words. It wasn’t that he’d said anything you hadn’t told yourself, you knew after all that being afraid of the dark wasn’t without a purpose, that it wasn’t utterly irrational in itself. But it felt different when Albedo said it. When you said it there was always your anxiety to counter it, when Albedo said it you accepted it as true. For it was Albedo who said it, and he’d never lie to you.
“Thank you.” You mumbled, hugging the coat closer around you, happy to be enveloped in something so familiar and comforting.
“Of course,” Albedo smiled, kissing you on your forehead, “I love you. So very dearly.”
The rest of the night you kept his coat wrapped around you. Although Albedo had quickly reverted to his informative sort of state he hadn’t forgotten what had passed, and every once in a while he’d give you a quick hug, or squeeze your hand in reassurance.
Overall it wasn’t such a terrible night.
Childe
There was no hiding your fears from Childe.
The man was the nosiest – or perhaps most observant – person you’d ever met, and he’d quickly put two and two together as soon as you’d started living together.
Unfortunately for you Childe also had the kind of work schedule that would make a surgeon’s job feel envious. And a part of that schedule entailed you staying up at all hours of the night, trying desperately not to jump at every sound.
You knew that it was going to be one of those nights, and as of such you’d decided to take a nap in the afternoon, so the lack of sleep wouldn’t weigh on you too much. The afternoon sun had been strong, and though you’d decided not to close the curtains you also didn’t bother to keep any of the lights on. After all it wasn’t supposed to be more than an hour long nap or so, and keeping the lights on felt like a bit of waste.
Your regret came the moment you opened your eyes to the pitch black of your room.
How did something change so drastically from daytime to nighttime? All the familiar figures around you seemed to have disappeared, or perhaps it was more accurate to say they’d been transformed. Now even your closet door seemed to have taken on a life of its own, wriggling within its frame as if possessed. The unobstructed window cut harsh lines along your floor, but it was a cloudy sort of night, and every once in a while even the moon would be snuffed out, sending your heart rate skyrocketing once more.
You were utterly and totally paralyzed. At first you’d drawn the covers over your head, hoping to block it all out, but it was a warm evening and quickly you found yourself throwing your blankets off, needing some unobstructed air, met once more with the terror of the dark.
Childe, you wished Childe were here. He always knew how to chase away the dark, how to make the books and the lamps and the dressers go back to their usual selves. His teasing annoyed you sometimes, but now you longed for the distraction. If only he weren’t so late. If only you’d paid better attention to the time, if only.
Your eyes darted around your room, as if seeking out something you knew wasn’t there. You knew that whatever you saw was an illusion, the result of your brain trying to piece something together, something to keep it from getting bored. You knew perfectly well that it was an explainable phenomenon. And yet fear is so very difficult to fight, so though you continued scolding yourself for your nonsensical actions, you also continued to look around, sure that you’d find something if only you paid enough attention.
Time had frozen along with you, and you were so preoccupied with your fear that the door opening came as a terrible shock. You jumped, adrenaline racing through your veins, but the muffled “I’m home” was what you’d been waiting for. You just needed to go greet him. The moment you got out of your room and to the light of the kitchen it’d be alright. But you were still frozen, and though your mind screamed at your limbs to move you found there was no escaping the sort of spell that had been cast by your fear.
The sliver of light from the hallway finally began to eat away at your trance. The door opening to reveal Childe was what completely broke it.
“Darling, what’s wrong?” Childe asked, a look of concerned plastered on his face. You let out a strangled sort of cry as an answer, fumbling off the bed before catapulting straight into his arms, burying your face in his chest. Childe immediately reciprocated the hug, stroking your hair in a soft, soothing motion. It hadn’t taken much to put the pieces together. What else after all could it be.
“It was the dark, wasn’t it?” He asked, whispering a faint “ah” in response to you nodding your head. “It’s okay my darling, I’m here. You don’t have to be afraid anymore, alright? It’s okay, it’s alright. It must’ve been very frightening to be alone.” His voice was almost melodic, the sotto tone slowly coaxing you back to yourself.
How confused would people be, you thought to yourself, how confused they’d be if they realized how kind Childe truly is. But you were grateful for that kindness. Right now it was what you needed. There’d be teasing tomorrow, teasing and bantering, and everything that was the usual Childe. But right now there was only comfort and softness, and you thanked Childe and the archons for it.
The rest of the night was a sedate one. You were both tired, Childe from his work, you from not only yours but the terrible fright you’d had. The two of you had eaten a late dinner, chairs pulled up next to each other, hands intertwining intermittently. There wasn’t much talking, instead you two enjoyed being in each other’s presence; the familiarity and comfort it brought.
Though the night was still warm you found yourself cuddling, arms wrapped around one another, legs tangled together. The beating of Childe’s heart steadied you, his breathing reminded you that he was there, that you were safe now. You didn’t have to fear the demons that your mind imagined. He’d scare them away for you.
It was difficult to keep secrets from Childe, and in the beginning the urge had been there. Who would want a significant other who jumped at shadows and was always spinning tales of the dark in their head? Especially someone like Childe who was so confident, so self-possessed. It was shameful, a part of you told yourself, how could he bear it?
But you were glad he’d figured it out, that you couldn’t keep secrets from him. Because at the end of the day Childe knew you best, knew how to keep the fear and the anxiety at bay, knew that being afraid of the dark, although worth a little teasing, didn’t make you any less of a mature and intelligent human being. And for that you loved him.
You loved him so much.
Diluc
“I know this might be sudden, but I want you to move into the Winery.”
That simple sentence had the adverse effect of completely messing up your life.
Your initial reaction had essentially been to buffer. Living together with Diluc, living with the person you loved above all others, it really seemed like a dream come true. Like something you’d wish to happen without any hope of said wish being realized. And yet it wasn’t a dream. He’d actually asked you. Diluc had actually asked you to live with him.
Once you’d gotten over your initial euphoria however a problem seemed instantly to present itself. That problem being that you were absolutely terrified of the Winery after dark.
I mean, who wouldn’t be? It was an old building, old enough for servants to whisper about lights that turned on without prompting, about footsteps coming down the empty halls, about people of old stepping out of their portraits and dancing the night away. It was absolutely terrifying to you, who already looked upon the dark with no little suspicion. And although the occasional night with Diluc was fine, you weren’t sure if you could deal with waiting in such a vast, creaking space alone.
But you didn’t want to tell Diluc that. Because though you were indeed a bit terrified, living with him did sound heavenly. It was something you dreamed of, and you didn’t want Diluc to come away with the wrong impression, the idea that you somehow thought he was being too familiar or going too fast. The thought of telling Diluc about your predicament never crossed your mind in the span of the conversation. After all it wasn’t as if he could do anything about it, he couldn’t very well redo the entire winery. Besides, it was such a silly fear, telling him about it would feel like you were making a mountain out of a molehill.
Eventually your mind settled on an answer: dragging the matter out. Professing your happiness at the idea you told him that it would require some mulling over, not to mention the paperwork in regards to the apartment you were currently living in. Diluc took it all with perfect understanding, assuring you that he could wait. “Besides,” he’d said, “what’s a little while when compared to the rest of our lives?” You’d blushed profusely at that, burying your face in Diluc’s neck. Yes, it would be alright in the end. And with that you pushed it out of your mind.
For the time being.
Although Diluc had many virtues patience was – perhaps surprisingly – not among them. Not more than three days had passed before he mentioned it again. Not that you were unhappy about it, no it wasn’t that. Nor did you feel pressured by him, you certainly didn’t. It was just the question of the Winery itself, and the fear that hung over your head like a sword. Just some time, a little more time.
The days turned into weeks, then almost a whole month, the whole time being wrapped up in your little song and dance. Diluc was evidently feeling dejected, but though you felt more than a little guilty about the whole matter, you still continued stalling.
Finally though things came to a head.
“My dear I understand if you don’t want to move in, but please just tell me!” Diluc burst out, voice dripping with frustration. “I understand if this is going too fast, I understand if you’re overwhelmed, I understand if you realize you’re not ready. But you must tell me, you must tell me what you’re thinking or else I’ll never be able to put this at rest.”
“It’s not that.” You assured him, shaking your head violently.
“Then what is it?” Your reply stuck in your mouth at his question. Why had it come to this? Conflicting emotions rose inside you, but all of them pointed towards one thing. You needed to tell him the truth. You needed to, or else this was going to turn into one of the stupidest rows you’d ever participated in.
“I… I’m afraid of the dark.” You replied softly, voice petering out to be no more than a whisper. Immediately the look of exasperation on Diluc’s face was replaced by one of concern.
“My dear?”
“I’m afraid of the dark,” you replied, this time with more force, “I’m afraid of the dark and I’m really afraid of the Winery after dark. So that’s why I’ve been putting it off. Not because I don’t want to move in, not because I think this is going too fast, but because the Winery makes me uncomfortable after dark. It’s so creaky and open and old and while that might be charming in the daytime, at night I feel like someone’s watching me.” You hugged yourself slightly, the image placed vividly in your mind. Yes, you did feel like you were being watched. Everywhere you turned you were surrounded by the eyes of those who were long gone, and it frightened you, how terribly it frightened you.
Diluc closed the distance between the two of you, wrapping you in his embrace. You reciprocated immediately, inhaling deeply, comforted by his presence.
“I’m sorry my dear, I didn’t know. If I had I’d have never proposed it.”
“You couldn’t’ve known,” your voice was slightly muffled by his jacket, “besides, I didn’t want to tell you. Because I knew you couldn’t do anything about it.” Lifting your head up you gazed at Diluc, who cupped your face with his hand.
“You don’t have to move in my dear.” Diluc’s voice was soft but firm, there was nothing but sympathy and encouragement in it. You smiled softly, leaning into the palm of his hand.
“But I want to. That’s the problem Diluc, I desperately want to move in. And yet I don’t know what to do. I can’t have you hanging around me each night. You’re the Darknight Hero. I cannot expect you to give that up for me. Even if you said you would I wouldn’t let you. I know how much it matters to you.”
There was a pause before Diluc spoke again. “Then let me suggest this. We see ways that we might accommodate. Perhaps a night lamp or some such thing. Or perhaps I need to pay more attention to the structure of the Winery. We’ll see what we can do together, and if nothing can be solved then we’ll find another way. Is that alright, my dear?”
“That sounds lovely.” You replied, finally smiling in earnest. What did you do to deserve such a human in your life? It felt like too much sometimes. You were experiencing such happiness as you seldom had before, not to such a degree. And you cherished it with all your heart.
It was the evening. You two were getting ready for the night, you preparing to go home, Diluc preparing for the task ahead of him.
“You spoil me terribly, you know.” You said, planting a quick kiss on Diluc’s cheek. Diluc smiled slightly mischievously, leaning down to give you a proper kiss.
“I don’t spoil you.” He finally replied, expression softening to one of fondness. “And if there was anyone in the world worth spoiling it’s you. I love you my dear, I’d do anything for you.”
“And I for you.” Your reply was soft, you yourself overcome by the love you felt.
It’d be alright in the end. If you knew anything, you knew that. It’d be alright. Because you’d have the one you loved most in the world with you every step.
#this title is so pompous...#the other option was 'irrational'#Blatant wish fulfillment when it comes to wearing albedo’s coat#Also is Diluc’s too rushed?#genshin impact#genshin impact fanfiction#albedo#childe#diluc#albedo x reader#childe x reader#diluc x reader#scenarios#my writing
323 notes
·
View notes
Text
Safety Net || part two (final). (m.)
all rights reserved © pradaksj
↳do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.
❧ summary ⟶ on new year’s eve, you and jungkook reflect on each other’s entire year together.
❧ pairing⟶ jungkook/reader
❧ genre⟶ enemies to friends, friends to lovers, fluff, angst, pining, smut, boxer!jungkook. two-part series.
❧ word count ⟶ 16,000+
❧ warnings ⟶ descriptions of an anxiety/panic attack, character death (non-major), smut which includes ... passionate to rough sex, oral (female receiving), penetration, fingering, unprotected sex (please have sex responsibly lol).
❧ music⟶ safety net, selfish, stuck on you, exile, +more
❧ a/n ⟶ I am still fairly new to writing smut so sorry if it doesn’t meet your expectations 😭 also to all my people who don’t like smut “*” signals where you can stop reading as the smut is really just a bonus scene at the end. and remember dark purple = entering/still in the past, light purple = present
01 | 02 (final)
“God were we dramatic,” you laugh, glad that the recollection of your big fight with Jungkook was something that could by now be laughed at rather than seen as something you’d dearly regret, “Don’t you think?” you ask Jungkook, concern immediately washing over you once you see the sad look on his face, “Jungkook?”
Jungkook stares blankly at the lake in front of him, surprised at the resurgence of the same heavy feeling in chest he had felt several months before, “Did I—Did I say something wrong?” you worry that you’ve hurt his feelings, that being one of, if not the, last thing you wanted to do tonight.
Quietly he nods his head no, “I just—” he struggles to voice his thoughts, “I was—” he shakes his head and you grab his hand in comfort, giving him a small smile.
“Hey,” you giggle, “what happened is in the past,” you reassure.
“I know but—” he sighs, pushing his hair back with his other hand, “I just still feel bad, you know? I mean we went a whole month without talking…. practically hating one another…”
August 2019.
It had been about a month since your explosive argument with Jungkook, and despite living together... the two of you had never been so far apart. Not only were you not on speaking terms, but it was as if neither of you existed in each other's proper world, completely avoiding each other at all costs.
One would think that because you two lived with one another, you’d be bound to have some kind of awkward bump ins from time to time, but somehow the two of you managed to steer clear of each other. From eating breakfast and dinner at separate times, to talking to Hobi at your own respective times, and of course the first thing Jungkook did the next day after your fight was move his things out of your restroom and into Hobi’s. You weren’t going to lie, it did sting just a little , but you were quick to get over it. The part that made Hobi roll his eyes even further back than they already did, was how quickly you two scrambled around each other whenever you did happen to coincidentally be in the same place such as the kitchen.
Originally Hobi tried any and every method possible to get you two to make up, knocking on doors and trying to trick you two into talking, faking handwriting, stealing personal belongings, and of course begging. Hell, he even tried confronting you two in one of the rare times you guys were in the kitchen at the same time, but all you two did was remain silent and go back into your respective rooms. Not bothering to even spare a glance at one another.
He had given up about two weeks in of trying, deciding that it was up to you two to figure out how you guys would make up. But it wasn’t until this Friday morning when he saw a certain letter stick out of the mail that he found himself loudly sighing.
“Oh Jungkook…” he whispers to himself, shaking his head as he read the letter in front of him. What was he going to do now?
It didn’t take long for Jungkook to get used to being the lone wolf in the apartment again, in fact it was easy for him to completely ignore your existence. It was easy to watch you struggle opening a jar full of kimchi. It was easy to catch a glimpse of you and Hobi watching One Piece on the couch whenever he was making his way out of the apartment to go and party. It was easy to hear you sing along to some new girl group song and not join along whenever he passed by your room. And it was very easy to hate you. Very easy indeed.
Gosh, who was he kidding? It was the hardest freaking thing in the world to do. Especially because he didn’t hate you at all. Pretending to? Yes. Actually? Fuck no.
If he was being honest, any hatred he had felt in the moment of the big argument had been rapidly washed away the moment he slammed his door shut. Instead it had been quickly replaced by the feeling of hurt and sadness. He even found himself sneaking into the kitchen that night to grab an extra pint of ice cream from the freezer and watch some stupid K-drama from his laptop back in his room. Even shedding a small tear when the male and female lead had to break up due to unforeseen circumstances. But of course if you asked him if it was true, he’d deny it in a heartbeat.
He’d often find himself zoning out and replaying the fight in his head. God, was he an idiot. What was he thinking destroying your painting like that? Did he really think you weren’t going to react the way you did? Sadly, the answer was a mixture of both yes and no. Yes, he wanted you to feel as hurt as he did, but he didn’t expect you to go fully ballistic on him. Did he blame you for it? No, of course not. You had every right to be mad at him as he had acted out in completely blind rage. Not bothering to stop for one moment and ask himself, am I okay with the possible outcome of what I’m about to do? Had he known it was going to be this, and well … he would’ve never done it.
It just happened so quick. One moment he was staring at the floor covered with broken pieces of glass and the next he had his fist going through the canvas of your painting, destroying the very thing he convinced you to work on. No wonder you hated him…
You hated him and you had every right to. He just wasn’t sure how long he was going to be able to take it anymore. Having to only catch glimpses of you from time to time and not being able to say anything because he was too ashamed to even look at you was truly killing him. And he could only imagine how you felt having to see him every day and night. Knowing the person you hated most was living under the same roof as you. Hell, if the roles were reversed he probably wouldn’t want you around at all.
Which is why as Jungkook currently stares aimlessly at the ceiling of his room, he knows he’s made the right decision.
The night of the fight between you and Jungkook, you had felt a range of emotions that honestly were quite overwhelming. Whenever you’d stare off into space you’d find yourself feeling very sad and reflective, but whenever you even caught a glimpse of your then destroyed painting on the floor you’d feel the rush of anger return all at once. It was like that the whole night, not even an episode of One Piece could cheer you up. If anything it made you feel even more confused because you were on the episode where (spoiler alert) *** dies, and well not only were you mad at how it happened, but sad because it was happening. Hell, that was probably the best way to describe how you felt about the whole argument.
The first couple of days had been hard to say the least, the dynamic between all three of you drastically changing in the matter of a couple days. No longer were there grocery shopping trips together, nor were there laundry days where you and Jungkook would compete to see who could fold the fastest, and of course there were no longer Netflix movie nights where Hobi would complain because you and Jungkook kept cracking too many jokes during the most intense scenes. Your laughs always echoing across the living room walls thus ruining the buildup of the scene.
You were good at pretending you didn’t care, in fact you were great at it. Maybe because a part of you actually didn’t care. You had long been fed up with Jungkook’s moody antics, and him destroying that painting was the final straw. Yeah, maybe you shouldn’t have gone into his room after he specifically told you not to, but you only did because you were worried about him and actually cared about him. Couldn’t he have seen that before he went full on rampage mode and destroyed your painting? He was wrong for what he did, and at the end of the day he had no right to hate you. Right?
These days you found yourself doubting it. It wasn’t like you were in the entire right, you mean you had invaded his privacy … you shake your head, begrudgingly getting out of bed before dwelling on your thoughts for any longer. The re-do of your painting, which currently sat on its easel, serving as reminder that you weren’t planning on talking to him anytime soon.
“Good Morning to you,” Hobi greets, watching you stomp your way into the kitchen, clearly running on an empty stomach. Jungkook was currently out, either working out or …. Hobi sighs recalling what he saw in the letter this morning.
“Good morning,” you mumble, the grouchy mood that Hobi found himself a little too used to making its morning return. In all the years he’s known you, to see you always this …. down …. was very unlike of you to say the least.
Whether you liked it or not, your fight with Jungkook had definitely changed some aspects of your personality, even if you didn’t want to admit it to yourself yet. Because no matter how good you were good at faking it, and trust him you were good (a professional indeed), behind that tough wall you had put up in the last month was a person who was hurt. A person who had their heart crushed right in front of them.
Grabbing two slices of bread, you place them in the toaster, preparing to make yourself some avocado toast. You sigh when you hear Hobi’s footsteps getting closer, not wanting to hear the whole “You need to talk to Jungkook” speech this early on a Saturday morning.
Turning around to face him, you’re prepared to protest against his usual lecture, “Hobi I don’t—” the sound of an envelope hitting the counter catching you off guard, stopping you from continuing any further. Furrowing your brows, your eyes glint with confusion. Hobi stares at you with a stoic expression, waiting for you to grab the letter from the island’s counter.
Slowly you grab the white envelope, extremely confused as to what this had to do with. The name on the recipient line reads, “Jeon Jungkook” and for a small second you feel your heart stop, but you’re quick to shake it off.
“This isn’t mine, if you can’t tell,” you scoff, preparing to hand the envelope back to Hobi.
Pushing your hand away, he says, “Read it,” his tone telling you that it wasn’t exactly an option.
Rolling your eyes, you pull out the single piece of paper that’s inside, unfolding the tri-folded letter. Your eyes quickly gaze over the subject line which reads, “Application Approval,” catching your attention. From there you continue to read…
Dear Jeon Jungkook,
We are pleased to notify you that we have received and accepted your application for the lease property of **** Jangsin-Ro, Apartment 32. Your lease will begin on September 28, 2019 and your rent amount is ₩**** for every 1st of the month. Any cancellations will result in a ₩*** fee. I want to thank you for your application and anticipate that you will have an enjoyable living experience in your new home.
If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.
Sincerely,
Bang Si-Hyuk.
Wait what? Your eyes reread the letter that’s in front of you because clearly you were reading something wrong. Your eyes must’ve been deceiving you because there was just no way…. Looking up at Hobi, you hope this was another of his attempts to get you to talk to Jungkook, but there he stood, straight faced as ever.
“He’s—” your voice whimpers like a little kid, “He’s moving out?”
“Ow!” Jungkook squirms, the feeling of your fingers pinching his arm hurting him, “What was that for?!” he yelps.
“For trying to move out without telling us! And don’t you dare ever pull something like that again,” you scold him, tempted to pinch him again.
Garnering a laugh out of him, you cross your arms like a kid and huff a loud breath of air, “Ah I won’t, I won’t,” he giggles, “Maybe…” he mumbles, but he’s quick to raise his arms in defense once he sees you ready to pinch him once again, “I’m just kidding,” he sings and you roll your eyes.
“Serves you right,” you mutter, letting out the hurt you felt that day to him because honestly, you had never gotten the opportunity to do so…
September 2019.
“Jungkook is moving out. Jungkook is moving out. Jungkook is moving out,” you think to yourself, having to come to terms with the fact that in exactly 48 hours from now Jungkook was officially going to be out of your life … for good.
You were shocked to say the least, when you saw the application letter, not exactly sure about what you felt. You mean, yeah you were definitely mad at Jungkook, but enough to the point where you wanted him officially out of your life? Hell no.
So then where the hell did he even get the idea to move out? It wasn’t like you two were being mean to each other, nor was there blatant hatred being shown on your part. All you two were doing were ignoring each other like two little kids. That should not be cause for someone to move out. Not at all!
A knock on the door catches your attention, “You ready?” Hobi asks, dressed in business like attire. His all black suit made him seem almost intimidating, that was until your eyes landed on his newly dyed cherry-red hair only causing you to stifle a small laugh.
Nodding your head, you look at yourself in the mirror one last time. Tonight was the night of the art exhibition, and you were very very nervous. You had turned in your piece a couple of days prior, but to have to later unveil it in front of everyone along with giving a small speech was nerve wracking. Especially considering you hadn’t involved yourself in the world of the arts for several years now, if anything you were used to constantly talking about accounting numbers and different business statistics.
“It’s either now or never,” you whisper to yourself, not knowing what awaited you.
“I just don’t get it Hobi,” you rant in the car, on your way to the galleria’s location, “he didn’t see me trying to move out when he was being nothing but a complete dick to me those first couple of months!” you pout, still not having accepted that Jungkook was moving out, despite constantly reminding yourself that he was.
Hobi sighs, feeling as if he’s heard you rant about this since you’ve found out … oh wait … you have! “Y/N—” he begins.
“No listen to me Hobi!” you interrupt, “Can he really not stand the sight of me that he feels the need to move out?? Was me going into his room really that big of an issue,” your voice wavers a bit, but you continue nonetheless, “And the fact that he hasn’t even bothered to tell you! So what? He was just planning on disappearing this coming Monday! Thinking no questions were going to be raised? I mean imagine you hadn’t seen that letter, he would’ve left thinking I hate him!” And to that Hobi lets out a scoff.
“What do you mean?” he scrunches his face, “He still is!” Hobi raises his finger before you could talk, “My turn,” he firmly states, only causing you to drop your defensive shoulders and roll your eyes.
“You two have not talked at all since your stupid little argument where clearly both of you were in the wrong!” he rants, repeating what he’s been saying for the last two months, the topic becoming tiresome, “And now one of you is leaving because neither of you can get over yourselves and just initiate some kind of freaking conversation! Just one conversation and I am one hundred percent sure everything will get cleared up and we can all go back to our daily lives, but nooooo both of you think we’re in some freaking K-drama, actually no, even K-dramas make up faster than the two of you!” he ends his rant on an insult, and you’re left there momentarily speechless.
“You are so—”
“I’m what?” Hobi glares at you, and you only narrow your eyes at him in return.
“You are so wrong,” you state, refusing to now look at him, instead looking out the window.
“I’m right and you know it,” you mumble something under your breath in response, “You invaded his privacy after he repeatedly told you not to, but for some reason you just felt the impulsive need to go into his room and find out what he was hiding. You know, I’m sorry Y/N but if Jungkook’s the biggest dickhead in existence then you my friend are the pushiest one,” he complains, finding his grip on the steering wheel becoming tighter. God, did the two of you get his blood pressure boiling up.
“You don’t get it, I had to go into his room,” you mutter, not exactly happy with the fact that Hobi is reading you for filth.
“No you didn't,” the two of you begin to go back and forth, voice raising with every sentence.
“Yes, I did.”
“No you did not.”
“Um yes—”
“Um n—”
“Yes, how else was I going to be able to find out what was hurting him?” you interrupt, turning to face Hobi, feeling the migraine in your head about to pop.
“And why would you need to know that?”
“Because I lo—” you quickly catch yourself before you could complete the sentence, crossing your arms and pouting. Like hell you’d confess in front of Hobi.
Hobi looks at you knowingly, “Because you what,” he taunts, knowing exactly what you were going to say,
“Just drive,” you mumble, your attention back to the window beside you, focusing on the view of the city streets.
“Ah Y/N, there you are!” Jimin greets you and Hobi, having barely walked in from your argumentative car ride, “You’re on in like ten minutes,” he nervously chuckles, worrying only minutes ago that you were going to be a no-show.
“That quick?” you ask in complete shock, barely having taken off your dress-coat. The churns in your stomach begin to make you feel physically sick and there’s now a certain dryness to your throat that you could only accredit to the tension you were now feeling. Your palms were even beginning to get a little sweaty. Why were you doing this again? Oh yeah … Jungkook.
“Come on let’s go and get you set up,” Jimin tugs at your hand, pulling you to follow him. With your other hand, you attempt to look for your flash cards, wanting to remind yourself of the specific points you needed to cover.
“What the—” your heart drops, unable to feel the flimsy piece of paper anywhere near the coat that hung against your arm, “Oh no,” you murmur to yourself, not wanting to panic Jimin, “No, no, no,” you repeat to yourself.
“Okay here we are,” he stops you two in front of your draped-covered painting, pulling out a lapel mic from his pocket, clipping it onto the collar of your outfit. Now that you weren’t moving, you were now barely taking note of just how many people filled the galleria, and it was a lot. There had to be at least 200 people, minimum. Each and every one of them slowly looking around at the already unveiled art pieces, their eyes doing the judging for them.
“Jimin I don’t know—”
“Hey, you’re gonna do just fine, it’s just a bit of stage fright I’m sure,” he reassures, and though you appreciate the gesture, coming from him it just didn’t mean much. You see, Jimin has always been what's called an optimistic person, similar to you in a way. Always trying to find the good in the bad. But in order for his words to really have some effect, it would’ve been better if he was a pessimist, someone who always saw the negative in everything because then to hear that you would do just fine would come more as a shock rather than as something expected, someone like—
You shake your head,“I’m just,” your outfit suddenly begins to feel as if it's squeezing the life out of you, “I’m really nervous,” you whisper to him out of breath, watching as people begin to crowd around your area. Were the walls closing in or was it just you?
He begins to test the mic, “Jimin—” you repeat his name, a cry for help, “I can’t—” but it’s too late.
“Hello everyone,” he speaks into his own microphone, and you scan the audience to see if you can spot Hobi. When you do, you notice the look of panic he has on his own face, probably aware of your distressed state, knowing that there was nothing he could do about it, “This artist I’m introducing to you, has been a personal friend of mine for years. I’ve known her since my first year in college, and I can vouch for just how talented she is,” Jimin glances at you, unaware of just how truly panicked you were, “So without further ado, y/n take it away,” he steps away, leaving you under the sole spotlight.
Remaining silent for a moment, you stare at the several pairs of eyes that had their gaze solely focused on you. “H-Hello,” you stutter into the mic, glad that it wasn’t a handheld one as you were sure that you would’ve been a jittering mess, “Um my name is y/n l/n,” you nervously smile, trying to find something to focus your attention on. Originally you planned on staring at Hobi the whole time, only to find out it made you even more of a stuttering mess. God, was it getting hot in here.
“So um I think we should um reveal the painting first,” you sputter out, signalling to Jimin that it was time. Slowly he removes the drape, the sound of clapping providing you a bit of a soothing effect. People liked it. People freaking liked it. It felt as if a brick or two had been dropped from your shoulders.
You gulp continuing with your speech, “So I um—” breathe y/n, “I call this piece safety net,” you turn sideways towards the painting, ready to explain, “I call it that because as y-you can see in the painting,” you mindlessly point to it as if the audience couldn’t see it themselves, “There’s the um the figure falling into what I call a safety net of flowers and—” you stare at the painting along with them, finding yourself getting lost in your own work, “well I painted this after—” you pause, the room completely silent, “after finding myself wanting to be someone’s safety net,” you mumble to yourself, a certain person coming to mind.
There’s an awkwardness to the room, the kind of stiffness you only find in tense moments. You weren’t sure if it was because the audience was trying to be respectful or you were just making a complete mess out of yourself, but either way Jimin awkwardly coughs, “So um we will now take questions from the audience,” Jimin hesitantly says, by now noticing the extremely panicked state you were in, but unsure of what to do.
A woman raises her hand, a volunteer for the galleria handing her a mic, “Hello,” she politely greets, giving you a warm smile, “So I was curious as to why you chose two colors that don’t conventionally go well together, I was wondering if you did that on purpose or…” and though you know her question means no harm, the voice in your head was convincing you that this was some kind of an attack.
“I um—” your breathing becomes heavier, “I—” Just speak, you keep telling yourself. Tell her that you chose two colors because they represented two different personalities. Say something you freaking idiot. “I um c-chose—” you begin to hear the sound of people murmuring all around you, their voices echoing loudly through your head. What were they saying? Did they hate your painting? Did they think it made absolutely no sense? Was it really that bad? What were you thinking when agreeing to do all this? How could you have been convinced to do this? You didn’t paint anymore for this exact reason.
With every thought that races through your mind, the sudden sense of impending doom only becomes stronger and your rapid breathing becomes louder. You had to be sweating because God did it feel like a fucking sauna in here. The tightness in your throat wasn’t helping at all as well only making the feeling of nausea further overwhelming. You needed to get out of here. Now.
And so without thinking… you run.
You yank out the mic and begin to run to God knows where, ignoring the shouts of your name along with the small number of gasps that could be heard.You needed to breathe again, and you desperately needed this feeling of danger to be gone.
Trying not to bump into too many people walking the dark city streets of Seoul, focusing on the sound of your heels clicking against the pavement, tuning out everything around you. “Just run,” you tell yourself, “Run until no one can find you.”
Soon the sound of your heels clacking against the pavement becoming the sound of your heels crunching against leaves. The pitch blackness of your surroundings causes tears to begin to well up, the trembling of your fingers along with the chills running down your spine making you feel as if you were running in an endless loop. Stop. Stop. Stop.
You come to sudden halt, pushing your arm against a nearby tree, desperately trying to catch your breath. You were alone now, isn’t this what you wanted? So then why did you still feel as if the world was crashing down on you. Why couldn’t you breathe? Why were hot tears spilling from your eyes? What the hell was wrong with you?
By now your sobs are in full force, your heaving chest only adding to its force. Because of your crying, you fail to hear a voice, “There you are!” Jungkook catches his breath, surprised at how fast you could run in heels. For a small second he thought he had lost you in the chase, with the way you maneuvered around everyone, he was thankful he hadn’t.
“Y/N,” he calls out, expecting you to turn, but he’s met with silence. You were having a panic attack, a bad one at that. Making his way closer to you, he’s careful in how he approaches you, grabbing your hand before you could run any further, “Y/N,” he repeats, this time turning you to face him, but you continue to cry in hysteria, your vision blurred by just how fast tears were falling from your eyes.
“Hey, hey, hey, look at me y/n,” he cups your face with his hands, a worrisome but firm look on his face, “I need you to breathe with me, okay?” your chest continues to heave, the rapid breaths of air coming from your mouth at an alarming rate, “Y/N!” he shouts, causing you to go silent, “Y/N…” he softly repeats, knowing he’s gotten your attention. You stare at him in silence, “One,” he inhales a big breath of air, “Two,” he exhales out, “Inhale,” he repeats his actions again, “Exhale,” he breathes out.
Slowly you begin to follow. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
In no time, your heartbeat begins to slow down, your mind focused enough on the task at hand that you begin to forget why you were ever panicked to begin with. “Hey,” Jungkook whispers, caressing your cheek with his hand, “You’re doing great,” he reassures you, providing you the words of comfort you so desperately needed to hear right now.
It had been so long since you’d gone through having a panic attack, almost forgetting just how bad they could sometimes get. But for now staring into Jungkook’s eyes and practicing some breathing exercises was enough to remember that no matter how bad they got, you’d get through them.
His fingers gently graze your cheeks, continuing to mumble small phrases of reassurance while you were getting control of yourself. “Has anyone ever told you,” you place a finger to the corner of his eye, quietly breathing your words out, “you have very round eyes,” you say and Jungkook lets a huffed laugh out in response.
He scrunches his nose and smiles, “Yeah, a lot of people have actually,” he laughs, a toothy grin spreading across his face while he uncups your cheeks, feeling a sense of tranquility wash over him as he knew you were going to be just fine, “I’ve been told they look like a doe’s eyes,” you quietly nod your head yes, agreeing with his statement, a warm smile on your face.
“Come on,” he intertwines your fingers, gently pulling you to follow him and leading you to a park bench that was near. But the thing was, it wasn’t just any park bench, it was the park bench from the night Jungkook was drunk and the two of you had gotten into the fight with that drunk man. What were the odds? You hadn’t even noticed that you ran this far till now...
He exhales a large breath of air once you two sit, allowing a neither comfortable nor awkward silence fill the air. Despite the heartwarming moment that happened only minutes ago, there were still things that needed to be talked about. Things that simply couldn’t be forgotten. It was the sole reason he had gone to the art exhibition because he wanted, no, he needed to talk to you.
He just hadn’t expected to see you running out in complete panic right as he walked in. The tears that were slowly rolling down from your eyes, causing him to feel a sudden sense of heartbreak. For the only reason you’d ever cry would be if your hard work were to be destroyed, whether physically or emotionally. It was the same despaired look you had given him that fateful day he decided to throw everything good that was becoming of his life out the window.
And so to see the scene in front of him play out had definitely caused both a mix of anger and sadness to boil within him. His urge to defend and protect you, almost overcoming his need to go out and make sure you were okay. That was until he found himself running out the door, signalling to Hobi that he’d handle it.
And so now here the two of you were, quietly sitting on a park bench with your hands being the only things physically touching, a comfort of its own for the both of you. It didn’t feel weird nor did it feel wrong because if anything it just felt right.
A part of you thinks and hopes it could remain like this forever, scared that if it didn't, you’d have to return back to the world where you and Jungkook were nothing more than strangers who were once friends. The world where acting as if one or the other didn’t exist was completely normal. The one where you’d find your heart selfishly longing for him despite stubbornly not wanting to. And so whether it be for a small second, a minute, or an hour, for now at least you just wanted to savor the moment because who knew what would possibly happen if he decided to leave and never come back.
“Y/N…” he begins.
“Shh,” you whisper, your puffy eyes softly gazing at the view of the trees in front of you, the silhouettes of trees as well sound of the wind softly pushing against the branches, a view you were once so scared of, not so scary anymore, “Just one more second,” you close your eyes, taking in one final breath of air. Jungkook feels his heart swell at the sight, remembering the scene from only months ago where it had been you doing all the staring. You pull his hand when you’re ready, your soft gaze now directed towards him.
“I just—” he begins to stutter, “I wanted to—” he feels his eyes get watery, the rush of emotion he was beginning to feel almost overwhelming him, “I wanted to say I’m sorry,” his voice slightly cracks, “for everything,” he whispers, allowing a tear to fall from his eye, feeling the weight he had been holding onto his shoulders now falling. The small leaks of vulnerability that you had occasionally seen now completely flooding through his walls of defense, that single tear becoming several, until soon you hear a sob emit from his mouth, but by then you have him wrapped in a hug, the sound of his sobs being muffled by your shoulder. Slowly you caress his hair, gently stroking and twirling the locks of his wavy hair in between your fingers, deciding that this time around silence was the best way to go.
“I’m so sorry,” he hysterically cries, holding onto you tighter, as if you’d go anywhere. He begins to shake his head, struggling to find the words that’d best describe how he felt at this current moment, “I’m—”
“Hey, hey, hey,” it’s your turn to say the words, gently pushing him off you so he could meet your gaze, “I know,” you reassure, “and I forgive you. The same way I’m sure you’ve forgiven me for snooping around your room like that,” you jokingly assume, and he smiles despite having red bloodshot eyes, “We were angry, and we said and did things that we shouldn't had but that doesn’t mean we have to hold them over our own heads for the rest of our lives,” you grip his hand tighter, “you made a mistake, and I made one as well. And rather than explode on one another and ignore each other, we should’ve talked about where we went wrong, and yeah,” you repeat your words from months ago, “maybe we didn’t get to do this as early as we hoped, in fact we’re quite late,” you giggle, “but we’re here nonetheless. And so let’s talk,” you say, ready to listen to the boy you had fallen in love with.
Jungkook stares at you in silence, a million thoughts racing through his mind, wondering how you always knew exactly what to say at the exact moment, “I,” he hesitates before continuing, “I need to start from the beginning,” he says, wiping any residue from the tears in his eyes, ready to open up the book he had kept closed for so long.
You nod to him, signalling that you were listening, “When I was a kid, I um,” he gulps, “I guess you could say I had a knack for boxing. Originally, my dad had taught me as a way to protect myself if I ever came across a situation that’d require me to defend myself,” his fingers begin to fidget within yours, a sign that he was nervous. Quick to soothe him, you rub small circles on the palms of his hands, his gaze occasionally avoiding eye contact.
“But I also think it was because my dad, who once wanted to be a boxer himself, saw me a way to vicariously live out his dream. Because soon he noticed that the knack I had for it was more of a talent,” a small smile appears on his lips, “and well by then he had begun to seriously train me… I remember always coming back after school and dulging right into practice, waking up on weekends and running laps at the park with my dad in order to gain stamina, and just,” he exhales a breath, “and just thinking to myself how proud I wanted to make him,” uncontrollably a tear falls from his face once again, and he tries to gain his composure before continuing, not wanting to begin the sob fest too early, “Once he thought I was ready, my dad had begun to sign me up for amatuer competitions, and well I did amazing,” Jungkook laughs.
“And soon boxing would become the sport I’d find myself building my life upon, but one day—“ he sighs, knowing the conclusion to his own story and well this was only the beginning, “one day during high school we had this um career day I guess you could call it, and well long story short after going around and listening to how passionate some of spokespersons were of their careers, I remember thinking, is boxing something I was doing for myself or for my father?”
A sad smile appears on his face, “I think the most confusing part for me was that I wasn't exactly passionate about anything else but I also just knew deep down in my heart that boxing wasn’t for me, you know? To this day I don’t know what exactly it is I'm passionate for,” he laughs, “and I certainly don’t see myself making coffee and flipping pancakes for the rest of my life,” he jokes around, an attempt the make the atmosphere a little lighter, “but I think with the help of someone I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s okay to be a bit of a late bloomer,” he winks at you, “one day I’ll wake up and just know…”
You give him a small reassuring smile, happy to know that he’s learned his own lessons along the way, even if it required a bit of pushing.
”But back to my story,” he awkwardly laughs, the small feign of happiness gone, “Though I had realized it already… maybe it was because I was scared, or maybe it was just—” he shakes his head, unable to find the words, “I just,” he sighs, “I just couldn’t tell my dad because for me telling my dad would feel as if I was telling him that all the years of hard work were going down the drain. That the endless nights of working out and exhausting ourselves to sleep were all for nothing. And so when my dad told me that managed to get me a spot at some training camp in the states, I took it. I mean it wasn’t like I had anything going for me here in Korea, and well I needed to guarantee my own future,” he shifts uncomfortably, remembering everything a little too vividly.
“I did pretty well for a couple years, slowly began climbing the ranks, and the natural talent I had for the sport was beginning to really shape itself, even catching the attention of prominent sport reporters. Long story short, I’d find myself surrounded with nothing but yes men and leeches who wanted nothing more than a piece of my so called success,” he gazes off to the distance, ashamed of the ego that had been built as a result of such people, “and well when you get told that you’re the best, that no one can stop you, that you’re untouchable, you truly begin to believe it,” he lets out a chuckle, “so when Brandon Star, a man who was nearly out of my weight class, began to provoke me for a fight on television after winning some match and I kept hearing from my so called friends that it’d be an easy match or that it was a guaranteed win, how could I say no? Of course at the time I didn’t know that they would be betting against me… so I said yes.”
A momentary silence fills the air as Jungkook had never told this whole story to anyone, the revealing of everything somewhat freeing for him, “A part of me knew I was way in over my head, it was like a gut feeling, you know? But I needed someone, anyone, to tell me the truth and to confirm what I was thinking. I needed someone who was going to criticize me instead of nodding their head yes and pretending that everything was going to be just fine. I think that’s why when I first met you, you reminded me so much of the people who were around me in the states, faking a smile in order to spare my feelings.” Sadness clouds his features, ashamed of how he took everything out on you when all you were doing was simply being the person you always were... kind. For that, he was truly sorry.
“Anyways,��� he continues, “that night of the fight, the feeling I had in my stomach was overwhelming. I told my dad, who was helping prep me backstage like he always did, that I felt nervous. That I was scared,” his voice cracks and he closes his eyes, remembering the scene as if it was yesterday, “and my dad well...he’s always struggled with separating being a father and being a trainer,” Jungkook tries to contain the sob that’s begging to come out, “but at that moment I just needed my dad. I needed him to tell me that win or lose everything was going to be fine. That he’d be proud of me no matter what,” he finally cries, and as you’re about to pull him into another hug, he vigorously shakes his head, stopping you from doing so.
“No, I need to finish thi—”
“Jungkook,” you softly interrupt because it wasn’t that you didn’t want to hear anymore, you just weren’t sure if you could hear anymore without at some point sobbing yourself, “you don’t need to, especially if you’re not ready,” you stare at him with a sad look on your face.
“No, you deserve to know,” he firmly states, “you deserve to know,” he quietly repeats to himself. You nod your head in understanding, waiting for him to continue as he wipes away his tears with the sleeve of his shirt, composing himself.
“He told me that I’d do just fine, that the son he’s trained so long for wouldn’t fail him now,” he mumbles, the words of his father still echoing in his mind, “When you go and box, you’re supposed to enter that ring with no concerns of the real world, you’re supposed to put any negative or anxious thoughts you had outside the ring to rest. Because the moment you let just one of those thoughts seep through, you might as well hang up your gloves right then and there,” his expression hardens, “I went into that ring knowing I was going to lose…”
“From there I don’t remember too much,” he bitterly lets out a laugh, “I just remember being on a gurney and feeling the heaviness of Star’s punches beginning to weigh down on my chest, clearly having done some damage to my ribs,” he sighs, “but the moment I remember so clearly is my parents trying to make their way to me, doing their best to push their way in an effort to see me. I don’t know if it was because I was just so mad at myself,” his voice shakes, “or because I confused the look of sadness on my dad’s face with disappointment, but at the time—“ his voice falters again, “At the time I thought how ashamed he must’ve been of me,” he fights through his tears, trudging through the story, “And so as I was being lifted into the truck, I kept yelling how this was his fault, that it weren’t for him I wouldn’t be in this position,” Jungkook lifts his head up, combing a hand through his hair.
“When I got to the hospital, I refused to let my parents see me, I was just too—“ God, did he sometimes wish he could go back in time and change everything, “I was too stubborn, too ashamed with myself to even look at them. So I ran,” he says, catching you by surprise, “I needed time alone so I ran,” he repeats, “I ran before they could find me, I just got up and ran,” there’s a haunting emptiness that lingers in his voice, one that brings chills down your spine.
“I called Hobi, and I told him that I needed to redeem a favor,” your mind flashes back to the night Hobi told you what he knew, “And I thought this is what I needed. That I’d be okay with starting anew, and that if I could firmly plant my feet in Seoul then I could visit my parents in Busan, and tell them how sorry I was without them having to worry too much about what the future would hold for me… and explain to them what happened, what I felt, and why I ran. That was my plan,” his voice cracks, “I was reaching a point in my life where I felt so content, so happy. I’d wake up to see you and Hobi making breakfast while imitating some random girl group dance and think to myself how things had managed to turn out so well for me despite my failure in the states. Or when we binged on One Piece episodes that whole night while stuffing our faces in tubed ice cream and I just felt like a little kid again without a worry in the world. But then …”
Jungkook feels the heavy feeling in his chest grow, “He passed away,” and just like that Jungkook feels as if the air has come out of his lungs, the same way it did the night he found out.
You feel your heart break at his words, recognition dawning over your face as everything was beginning to make sense. “My mom had managed to find my number in order to tell me there’d been an accident, and I just couldn’t believe it at first,” he attempts to hide his grief by stifling a sob, “I didn’t want to get up from bed at first because getting up would mean facing reality, it’d mean accepting that it wasn’t some kind of twisted fucked up nightmare but that it was real. That the last sight my dad saw of me was on some gurney,” his face twists, “that the last words I ever said to him were so—“ he breaks down, sobbing once again and this time you feel your own hot salty tears fall from your eyes, wrapping in such a tight hug that you weren’t sure if it was for his or your own sake.
He cries a sound so raw that it was almost as if the wound was still freshly cut, his hand clasping tightly onto your clothing for support. Any last defensive wall he had up was washed away by his salty tears, finally facing the final waves of grief, loss, and devastation in the arms of the person he had taken everything out on. The person he didn’t deserve at all, but had stayed nonetheless. You whisper sweet comforting words to his ear, wanting more than his grief to subside so that you could see the smile you loved so much appear on his face again.
“I just wish there was something I could’ve done differently,” he shakes his head, “so that he could know just how much his son loved and appreciated him,” he lifts his head up from your shoulder, wiping his tears away, and practicing his breathing as his chest had been heaving so bad because of his sobs, “And so that was why I completely changed that June and became cold. That was why I got so mad when I saw you in my room with the broken trophy I had gotten when I was a kid because I was just so reminded of everything,” he frowns, “and it had hit me like a freaking truck. To see my current world and the past one collide was just—“ he pauses, “overwhelming to say the least,” he concludes everything and you’re left there completely speechless.
You could’ve never in your wildest dreams even guessed that this was why Jungkook had come back to Seoul and why he had acted so cold for so long. His grievances had happened in such a short period of time, that all it took was one wrong move to set him completely off. No wonder he had kept himself so isolated … he knew he was ticking time bomb waiting to finally explode at any given moment.
The two of you stare at each other in silence, his words processing in both of your minds. You want to say the words that are currently repeating themselves in your mind, I love you. Three simple words that could make him forget his past, even if it was for a small moment in time. “Jungkook—” he looks up at you, “I—” you stutter, the words clinging onto the tip of your tongue, “I um,” you feel your chest become heavy as he stares at you in curiosity, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” you force out instead. He furrows his eyebrows, ready to protest against your apology, but you’re quick to interrupt before he gets the chance to.
“Since you’re being so honest with me, I feel like it’s only right I’m honest with you,” you bite your lip, disappointed with your cowardice, “So that like that we get a better understanding of one another,” you feign a smile.
“There’s a reason why I got so um…” you pause, “anxious before and during the galleria,” you narrow your eyes, it was now your turn to open a book that’d long been left incomplete. “I told you right? That I was an art student at Busan’s Art college but that I ended up transferring after an incident occurred…” He quietly nods, allowing you to continue, “and well I think I’m ready to talk about it,” you let out a breathy chuckle.
He stares at you in silence, ready to listen as well. “Growing up, I really liked painting,” you laugh, recalling the memory of you painting on the walls as a kid, “for some reason it was something I found myself falling further in love with every calendar year, but my parents, well they were on the more skeptical side of making a career out of it. I mean I don’t really blame them,” you sound unsure, “I mean I know that it’s hard these days to find success in the world of arts, or at least the level of success most people want to obtain but originally for me it didn’t matter,” you chuckle, remembering how naive you had been.
“Before entering college, I’d sell my little paintings and merchandise on those small-business centric websites like Etsy and stuff,” you say for example, “and you’re right, when you get told that you’re good at something, you really begin to believe it…”
Jungkook wants to interrupt and tell you that whatever your situation was, was much more different than his. That you were actually good at what you did, no, you were amazing at it. He wasn’t sure if he could listen to you talk down on yourself, but nonetheless he continues to listen.
“My first year of college I met people like Jimin who were so passionate about what they do that it really cemented the idea I had in wanting to turn my water painting into a career,” you sigh, “but in the back of my mind I always did have tiny doubts that lingered, and I always made sure not to feed them too much, but when you’re surrounded by people who are just as talented or even better than you, it gets hard not to.”
Jungkook completely understands where you’re coming from, having been in a similar position himself before. “And it didn’t help that my parents were constantly breathing down my neck about finding a different career to focus on,” you shrug “anyways,” you continue, shaking your head, “In Busan’s Art College, like many other colleges there are departments, like STEM and Business for example, but in this case things are separated by like dance, art, film, et cetera. And well if you can’t tell I’m a bit of a … pushy … person,” you laugh and Jungkook softly smiles, neither agreeing or disagreeing, “I think it’s due to me always feeling a need to overcompensate my insecurities, I guess. Like when you first moved in, in order to reassure myself that you didn’t hate me, the pushy side of me came out,” you explain, and the same way you began to understand Jungkook as he was explaining his story, Jungkook was beginning to understand you as a person.
“Well back to the focal point, I was a part of a committee club for painters within the art department, thinking that if I took charge of something, it’d increase my chances in succeeding in my career once I graduated. But the thing is, is when you join those committees I guess you could say there’s like a hierarchy of some sort, a cliché come to life,” you try your best to keep the conversation as lighthearted as you can, wanting the energy in the air to become one that was positive, a reflection of just how much you two had grown, “and well during my second year we were all assigned a project for some city poster in which we’d present to the committee’s leader, Nari, and where she and a couple of others would then choose which one was going to be used. And let me tell you, this was a career making project. The people who were going to be at the unveiling were names like Ji Hye Yeom, Haegue Yang, and more,” you sigh knowing you were coming to the rough part of the story.
“Nari had specifically told us that we were to only use materials she had chosen for us, and limited us to certain color schemes that in my opinion were the ugliest schemes I’d ever seen,” you scoff, “So me being the pushy person I am, I went ahead and continued with my original plan, which was making a watercolor painting because at the end of the day if my painting did happen to get chosen, I wanted it to be a genuine work of mine, not something that was limited by someone who was no more superior than me all because of some flimsy title,” you softly shake your head, “And so I poured my heart into it, working on it every chance I got during that school year in order to make sure that the committee would be so amazed , they’d have no choice but to choose it even if it didn’t exactly follow Nari’s regulations.”
A feigned smile graces onto your lips, refusing to cry at a situation from years ago, “I was so nervous that day to present it, but I was also so excited. Excited because I knew I created a piece that was so beautiful I—,” for a quick second your voice falters, but you’re quick to catch yourself, “I was just so sure they’d choose it,” you whisper, voice sounding frail and defeated.
“That day I presented it, I thought the silence that filled the room was because they were amazed,” you close your eyes for a moment, trying your best to push back any tears that wanted to make their way out, “God I still remember the extra specks of white and gold I added to it the night before, thinking those extra touches were really going to tip the scale in my favor,” you mumble, the embarrassment you felt that day coming back.
Jungkook feels his jaw harden, at this point an automatic response to the thought of your feelings being hurt. He didn’t know why, but to see someone as kind as you act out of character whether it be because you were mad or sad, always caused a heavy feeling in his chest. The only thing you deserved to feel was happiness and comfort, and though he wasn’t sure it was something, he, himself, could guarantee you … he’d be damned if he didn’t at least try.
“After what felt like 20 minutes, of complete silence she slowly got up in front of everyone,” you blankly stare at the trees in front of you, “I remember my heart beating out of my freaking chest for some reason, and the sweat beginning to form at my palms. And the moment she started speaking, I just went blank—” you turn to face Jungkook, who had a worrisome look on his face, “She started to berate me in front of everyone, insulting my hard work and telling me that even despite me breaking her guidelines, the painting still wasn’t any good,” you gulp, “But in fact, her words didn’t bother me at all,” you pause, “it was the comments from my supposed peers that really twisted the knife for me,” you scoff, “and then she did the unthinkable...”
Jungkook feels the heavy weight in his chest drop because he knows what you’re about to say. He knows what that woman did. And he knows why you were so hurt when he destroyed your painting, “She grabbed the canvas from the display board, and she ripped it,” you say, managing to muster up the smallest of smiles, but Jungkook knows that it's nothing more than a facade. An illusion so that he could think that you were no longer hurt by the actions of that woman.
“Once she did that, it just triggered everything else that followed after,” you furrow your brows, refusing to look at Jungkook, “I was being laughed at while having a panic attack,” you scoff, “I felt like I was in a scene from a high school movie,” you attempt to mask your hurt by making a joke.
“I ended up running out of the building, feeling as if my heart was going to explode from how fast it was pounding, and the compression in my throat was almost unbearable,” your voice cracks, “in just 20 minutes she took away any confidence I had in my artistic abilities, In just 20 minutes she made me question everything I knew about myself,” a tear finally falls from your eye, speaking the words you’d never said out loud before into the world.
“I attempted to stay at the school for a couple more weeks after that, but every time I picked up a paint brush, I just kept hearing her words along with the rest of my peers’ as well, second guessing every stroke I made on canvas. I had lost my spark,” you stifle a sob, “After that, I decided to transfer out and follow the plans’ my parents had always set out for me… and well, you know the rest,” you laugh in between your tears, wondering just how pitiful you must’ve looked. But soon enough you feel Jungkook's arms wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you into a hug so tight, you never wanted him to let go.
“Don’t leave,” you mumble into his chest.
Jungkook reassures you by cooing a small, “I won’t”, but gently you pull away once he does, holding onto his hand instead. A look of confusion washes over his face.
“No—” you shake your head, realizing he’s misunderstood, “I mean don’t leave our apartment,” you sniffle, giving him a small warm smile, leftover tears still brimming the corners of your eyes. His mouth gapes slightly open, taken back by your statement. He had completely forgotten that he was supposed to be moving out by Monday.
“We—” you shake your head, deciding that “we” wasn’t the right word in this case, “I need you,” you state, nothing but sincerity behind your words. Jungkook feels his heart skip a beat, the close-eyed soft smile that covers your face only making him smile in return.
He doesn’t need to say anything because you know … you know that he needs you just as much as you need him. You know that he’ll never leave your side from this day on because tonight was the start of a new chapter in your lives, one that included each other. Gently he pulls you into another hug, the warm fuzzy feeling in his chest being a feeling he could get used to.
“How did you even know where the venue was, or what the time the whole thing was?” you ask Jungkook, questions that hadn’t crossed your mind that day now forming.
“Hobi sent me a text that same night, very um … straightforward?” Jungkook chuckles, “It read, Art Exhibition. **** Namgang-Ro. 7:30 PM. Formal attire. You either go or you don’t. Up to you. Just don’t go crying later on that you regret not going. And well I had debated for several hours, originally chickening out and deciding to use me not having any formal suits as an excuse. That was until I walked into my room to find that Hobi had ironed one of his own for me to use,” Jungkook explains, “And well luckily I grew some balls and went and well now we’re here,” he smiles at you.
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t cut off too much of the story. We still have to remember all the good that came afterward,” you giggle, and he only flashes you an even bigger smile.
“Ah you’re right, you’re right. How could I forget?”
October 2019.
“Happy Halloween!” you and Jungkook wave to the kid dressed as Iron Man, glancing at the clock which currently read 10:00PM. Mm you’d give it one more hour before permanently closing your doors and calling it a day even if Jungkook protested for more time.
“Happy Halloween!” you and Jungkook wave to the kid dressed as Iron Man, glancing at the clock which currently read 10:00PM. Mm you’d give it one more hour before permanently closing your doors and calling it a day even if Jungkook protested for more time.
You see, tonight was Halloween, and for the first time since you and Hobi moved to your guys’ apartment, you were giving out candy to the little kids of your apartment complex who usually went floor to floor trick or treating and it was all thanks to Jungkook. You were surprised really, you would’ve never taken Jungkook as being someone who was such a kid at heart.
After weeks of begging, he’d finally managed to convince you and Hobi to not only dress, but distribute candy. Usually you and Hobi would turn off all the lights and ignore the knocks you’d receive on the door, choosing to have a movie night than to participate in Halloween festivities.
Realistically speaking, you sorta expected Jungkook to go out and party tonight which is why when he notified you weeks prior that all of you were going to be participating in giving out candy, you couldn’t find it in you to say no. Hobi on the other hand required a lot of convincing and though he wasn’t exactly helping with the distribution of candy, watching him dressed as Batman while lazily sitting on the couch with a glass of wine in his hand was a gift in its own.
Jungkook, who desperately wanted to be a male version of Harley Quinn, had made you help him with cinching his crop top, exposing his toned lower abdomen every time he even stretched the slightest bit. It was…. quite a site … even causing several moms with their kids to “accidentally” stumble on your apartment floor again after only being there 10 minutes prior, your own little green monster finally making its appearance ….
But besides that, your favorite part of his whole costume was definitely the face/eye makeup he had done. The smoky blue and red along with the fake tatted heart under his left eye truly acting as the selling point of his costume. It just made him look very hot, more than usual. Hobi had even caught you staring at the boy on several occasions, teasingly nudging you whenever he did.
With Hobi dressed as Batman and Jungkook dressed as Harley Quinn, that of course only left you, who was currently dressed as none other than a female version of the Joker from Suicide Squad because despite how shitty the movie was, the style in which they made the Joker was still indeed very cool. Jungkook had even lent you his own natural artistic abilities to draw the tattoos where your dominant hand couldn’t firmly paint, laughing at the “twinsies” jokes you made in reference to his own tattoos. It had even given you the opportunity to ask him what each one of his own real tattoos meant to him.
Most of his tattoos, he explained, were done out of impulse. A majority of them being done in the states on a complete whim, but a couple of them held significant meaning to him. For example, his tattoo of a bandaged hand clearly represented his history with boxing. He explained that rather than get the overused boxing gloves as a tattoo, he’d get a simple bandaged hand done, deciding that it looked cooler and that you agreed with. Another example was the tattoo that translated to “Life Goes On” which was pretty self-explanatory, but meaningful nonetheless. Jungkook explained that it was one his favorite mottos growing up, and well recently it seemed to weave perfectly into his life.
But your favorite tattoo? The small One Piece manga strip he had across his left forearm. The story behind it almost caused you to shed a tear, had it not been for your white powdered makeup, you probably would've cried. You see, when Jungkook was a young boy he’d always watch One Piece as a distraction from boxing, falling in love with the story and its characters.
His dad, who’d always scold him whenever he caught him late at night watching the anime, never understood why Jungkook liked the show so much. It wasn’t until one night he somehow managed to convince his dad to watch the episode he was on, and despite not knowing anything about what was going on nor the characters’ names, his dad ended up loving the show just as much as him. The show had acted as a new bond between the two, from buying the latest manga volumes to staying up late at night to watch the newest episode. And well the strip on Jungkook’s arm was from the exact episode he had managed to convince his dad to watch with him that night. The tattoo serves as a representation of a memory he holds dearest to him, a memory of his dad.
“Ah I think that’s the last of it,” Jungkook looks into the last bag of candy he had bought, absolutely nothing left inside, “Wasn’t this fu—”
“Let’s go get a tattoo,” you interrupt, the idea coming to you out of nowhere. Jungkook tilts his head in confusion, eyebrows furrowing. A tattoo? You? Ms. I do not even have a dot of ink on my skin?
“A tattoo!?” Hobi turns from the TV, now having got his attention.
Both men stare at you in silence, thinking this was all some big joke until you begin to nod, reaffirming your choice, “Yes! All three of us! Matching roommate tattoos,” you smile, not exactly sure what had gotten into you, but surprisingly... completely okay with it.
Jungkook, noticing just how serious you were about this, begins to feel a smile form on his face. It wasn’t like he minded, he just wanted to make sure you weren’t going to regret it the next morning, “Y/N, you sure you one? I mean … you’re not someone I picture getting a tattoo, I mean think of your job,” he chuckles.
“Yeah, think of your job!” Hobi butts in, clearly not in favor of getting a tattoo.
Vigorously, you nod your head, “I’m one hundred percent sure,” you laugh, “I promise you, I won’t regret it,” you stick out your pinky finger, and Jungkook is quick to hug it with his own.
“W-What the?” Hobi stutters, unsure if it was the alcohol or shock in his system causing it. Probably both.
You turn to Hobi, “If you really don’t want it, then you don’t have to get it,” you shrug, “But at least come with us,” you smile, hoping that once you were there at the parlor shop you’d be able to convince him.
Sitting on the leather stool with your forearm displayed, the tattooist begins to prep your skin placing rubbing alcohol on the area in which you had chosen to get your tattoo. Now that you are here, you couldn’t lie, you were a bit nervous. But mostly because you were skeptical of the pain the needle would give you.
Jungkook had described it as “a cat repeatedly scratching a sunburn”... as if you were supposed to know what that means. He also said that depending on your pain tolerance you’d either like the feeling, get used to it, or absolutely hate it. It just varied from person to person as well as the placement where you were choosing to get it.
Supposedly the inner wrist didn’t hurt, but with the sudden stinging sensation you were feeling, you were a bit unsure of that now.
“So is that your boyfriend out there?” the woman tattooing you suddenly asks, catching you completely by surprise. If she didn’t have a pricking needle against your skin , you probably would’ve jumped at the accusation.
Trying your best to keep your cool, you respond, “Oh um—” you shake your head, “No,” you awkwardly laugh, “I wish”, you think to yourself.
“Hmm,” she hums, the same smirk Jimin once gave you appearing on her face, “Sorta seemed like it out there, I mean I’m sure if he had the option he would’ve chosen to sit here right next to you and hold your hand,” she teases, and a blush appears on your cheeks.
“Oh that’s just how he is with everyone,” you reason, not wanting to feed into the delusions that Jungkook could possibly return any feelings for you, “He’s a very protective person, sometimes a little too much, but it has its benefits,” you joke around.
She shrugs, continuing to work on the small tattoo, “”Mm I don’t know, I mean the way with the way he looks at youuuu,” she sings, “because you clearly like him,” she laughs.
“No I don’t!” you pout, “We’re just close friends, that’s all….”
“Close friends don’t look at each other like that, and they’re certainly not as touchy as you two are,” she says, only causing you to scoff.
“You don’t know what you’re ta—”
“All done!” she smiles, wiping over the fresh new ink on your skin one last time, “Look how easy it was for me to get you to stop wincing so much,” she winks at you, and suddenly everything begins to make sense. She was trying to get you to relax. Was the topic she chose really the best one? No. But it worked didn’t it?
She places the plastic wrap over it, “So what do you think?” you stare at the new permanent piece of work on your skin, a small smile gracing your lips.
“Ah I—”
“Love it so much!” you flash Jungkook the two-month old ink on your skin, the digital numbers “00:00” acting as a permanent reminder of the day all three of you officially became roommates. It was small, yes, but to you it meant so much.
Jungkook pulls his own sleeve, showing you his own matching ink, “Zero o’ clock,” he hums, recalling a song he heard not too long ago on the radio.
“Ah too bad we couldn’t convince Hobi to get one,” you sigh, remembering how firm he was that night, “but we’ll get him next time,” you laugh.
Jungkook quirks his brow, “Next time?”
You nod your head, “I can see why people get addicted to these things,” you joke, “they’re like their own pieces of art,” you smile.
“Design mine next time,” he suddenly says, his statement coming off more as a command than a question. Turning to face him, you look for any small sign that he was joking.
“You’re kidding, right?”
“Nope,” he pops the ‘p’, “I think a watercolor style painting would look amazing rightttt,” he points to the side of his ribcage, “here.”
Eyes widening in shock, you’re in complete disbelief, “You—you’re crazy!” you laugh, refusing to take him seriously.
“Ah I’m being serious Y/N,” he pouts, “Come on you know you want toooo,” he sings, softly nudging you.
You stare at him for a moment, “Are you sure?” you ask, skeptical about his seriousness.
He nods, “As sure as you were about getting that tattoo that night,” he teases, and you only roll your eyes in return.
“Mmm,” you hum, “I’ll think about it.”
“Think?! I’m your roommate!” he dramatically complains, throwing his head against your shoulder, suddenly in a clingy mood. Maybe the tattooist was right… maybe you two were a little too touchy….
You mean, just last month during friendsgiving, Hobi just had to complain in front of everyone claiming, “If you two don’t get your own room—”
“Then I think at some point this turkey is going to come back alive just to tell you two himself,” he slurs his words, wine glass in hand.
Drunk Yoongi tags in, “How do you know it’s a he?” he squints his eyes, gearing up for a debate.
Hobi rolls his eyes and makes a dismissive motion with his hand, “Not now Yoongi,” he says, causing everyone sitting at the table to laugh, and he turns his attention back to you and Jungkook, currently sitting next to each other, “Are you two going to continue playing footsies or are you finally going to—”
Seokjin interrupts by awkwardly coughing and tapping his champagne glass with his fork, getting up from his seat in the process, “I think it’s the perfect time to do our annual “What am I thankful for” toast, so I’ll begin,” he laughs, all eyes on him, “So um this year I am thankful for all of my friends who continuously stick by side throughout the years, and for the wonderful woman I’ve grown to love more and more every day,” he warmly smiles at his girlfriend, the two already seeming like a married couple despite having only met this year. Seokjin turns his attention to Yoongi, signalling that it was his turn.
He groans before getting up, peeved as to why Seokjin always insisted on doing these things, “Okay okay—”
“This is gonna take a while,” you whisper to Jungkook, Yoongi’s speech now fading into the background.
Jungkook quietly chuckles in response, “You think? How long do you think it’ll take before he starts with his “back in my day” speech?” he jokes around.
Suddenly Yoongi’s voice becomes more audible, “Back in my day we didn’t use—”
You and Jungkook snortle a laugh, “Not long,” you respond, the two of you trying your best to keep your snickering at a low.
“So … got anything prepared?” he asks, this being his first year and all doing this kind of thing, he was a bit nervous as to what to say.
You shake your head, “Mm no, you just sorta say what’s on your mind? I guess?” you awkwardly laugh, “Trust me, as long as they have their bottles of soju next to them, whatever you say will go in one ear and out the other,” you reassure, remembering the first year you did this and gave a heartwarming speech, just for it to be ignored because Namjoon could’ve sworn he’d seen the “turkey move”. From there it led to an hour debate on whether a dead freaking turkey could still possibly be alive after having it in the oven for several hours.
He nods his head, noting what you’ve said.
After going around it was now the last toast of the night,“Ah and lastly onto our newest member in this friend group,” Namjoon, who had just finished his own speech, turns to Jungkook and pats his shoulder, “take it away,” he gives him a dimpled smile before sitting back in his seat.
Jungkook awkwardly blinks at him for a moment, not getting up until you nudge him to do so. “Oh yeah…” he forces a laugh, “Um so where do I begin,” you almost feel second hand embarrassment, if you thought you weren’t any good under pressure, Jungkook might take the crown.
“So… The first thing I want to say I’m thankful for are the new friends I’ve made since coming to Seoul,” he spares a glance to the boys, “um..” he bites his lip, “The second thing or person may I say, that I want to thank is Hobi…” he smiles at the drunk man, “well for giving me a second chance per say,” he chuckles, “I know I don’t say it often, but I’m truly grateful for you picking up my call that night,” Hobi gives a small warm smile, “And well the last person I want really want to mention that I’m thankful for is … you,” Jungkook suddenly turns his attention down to you, catching you by surprise.
Raising your eyebrows, you wonder where this is coming from, “I um—” he feighs a small laugh, “I know I wasn’t exactly the nicest person when I first moved in, but—” he exhales a breath, “But you gave continuously gave me a chance to prove otherwise every single time until I finally got it right,” he smiles, “and well last year I had a pretty rough year,” he jokes around, “and honestly I thought coming in 2019 it’d be just bad, but you single handedly proved me wrong and made sure this was going to be a year for me to remember and well for that I’m forever grateful,” you silently blink away any tears, not wanting to get teased at for crying after this his speech was done. He breaks away the gaze he held on you in order to finish his speech off, “So with that I say … cheers everyone!”
Everyone raises their glasses of whatever it was they chose to drink, clinking it all in the middle and repeating “Cheers!” before gulping down whatever was left of their drinks. The rest of the night is filled with nothing but laughs and joy, as well as the remainder of the month, every single day creating a new memory for the three of you, until you were left with nothing but...
“The present day,” you whisper to yourself, unable to believe that the year had gone by so fast.
“What a year it’s been huh…” Jungkook softly smiles, glancing at the time on his phone which reads 11:50. 10 more minutes until the new year. 10 more minutes until zero’o clock.
“Yeah…” a comfortable silence fills the air around you, how had the hour gone by in the blink of an eye? You wonder if it’s the effect Jungkook just naturally has on people because never did you find time going by so fast unless you were with him.
“I—”
“So—”
Your cheeks become a tinge of pink , “Oh you go first—” he shakes his head.
“No, no, go ahead,” he laughs, insisting that you go instead.
This was the perfect chance, the chance to tell him about the feelings you’d grown to have for him in the past year. You just needed to grow the courage to say those three letter words that were itching to be said. It was either now or never.
“I um, I just wanted to say thank you,” you chicken out once again, “I didn’t get the chance to say it on friendsgiving, but,” you gulp, “your speech it um meant a lot to me, and well I’m just as grateful for you,” you chuckle, “I think maybe even more.”
Had you noticed, you would’ve seen the slightly disappointed look on Jungkook’s face, “Oh..” he says, a small pout appearing on his face.
“What were you going to say?” you ask, faking the pep in your voice, ready to eternally scold yourself for being a chicken once you got back to the cabin.
He sighs, “It’s nothing really,” he shrugs, but you nudge his shoulder before he could divert the conversation elsewhere.
“Come on, just say it,” you tease, “because you either speak now or forever hold your piece,” you look at the time, “5 minutes till midnight.”
He stays silent for a moment, contemplating whether or not he should say what had been on his mind for quite some time, “I um—” fuck it, it was either now or never, “You know how I told you that I couldn’t sleep right? That it’s why I came out here…” you innocently nod your head as he continues, “well it’s cause I had already sorta been thinking about everything that’s happened this year…” he lets out a small chuckle.
“I mean isn’t it crazy?” he pushes his hair back with his hand, “Someone who was nothing more than a stranger before the clock hit twelve that night is now someone I can’t picture not being in my life,” you feel your heart flutter at his words, “And I mean to think we didn’t get along at first,” he lets out a breath of disbelief, “All because I was a person who was—” he pauses, unsure of how to describe himself from that time, “angry,” he decides to say, “I was an angry person who mad at the world,” he bites his lip in retribution for his attitude back then.
“No,” you laugh, shaking your head, “you were just someone who was… hurt. That’s all it was,” you say.
“You think?” you nod your head yes, “I never really thought about it like that,” he mumbles, “Would you do it all over again?” he suddenly asks, and you find yourself quirking your brow at his question, “Like if you had the chance would you do it all over again…” he further explains.
Without a second thought you say, “Yeah I would,” you giggle, “And you?”
He remains silent for a moment, pondering on his own question before nodding his head as well, “I wouldn’t mind doing it all over again because then I’d get to relive the process of falling in love with you all over again,” he finally says, “I’d get to pinpoint the exact moment this year that I fell in love with you.”
“In ten, nine, eight…” the families around you begin to shout the countdown, and all you can do is stare at Jungkook in disbelief of what you just heard come out of his mouth.
“Y-You love me?” you manage to stutter out, a smile now forming on your lips.
“Seven, six, five…..”
Silently, he nods his head, a loving smile on his face as he leans towards you, the flutter in your stomach only intensifying.
“Four, three, two, one….”
And as if time had stopped, his lips finally meet yours and the only thing you could feel were the placement of warm lips against yours, giving you a New Year’s kiss that would be remembered for years to come.
“Happy New Year!” the sound of fireworks popping are echoed in the background because the only thing you could focus on were the soft lips that were moving with yours. His fingers curl around yours, creating such an intimacy that you were sure you had to be dreaming. It wasn’t until you found yourself kissing him back that the reality of everything finally set in. Jungkook loved you.
Slowly he pulls away, savoring the kiss till its very last moment, “Happy New Years Y/N,” he whispers, a grin plastered on his face.
Laughing in return, you smile, “Happy New Years Jungkook.”
**
Once you and Jungkook returned to the cabin, you were met with several complaints from Hobi, “Finally! We’ve been freezing all night!” Hobi exclaimed the moment you two walked in, harshly grabbing the firewood from Jungkook’s hands. It wasn’t until he peeped your linked arms that everything began to make sense, “Ahhh,” he gives you two a toothy grin, “You guys, look who’ve finally confessed to one another,” he yells, catching the attention of everyone in the living room.
Suddenly the room is filled with several “finally’s” causing both of your mouths to slightly agape open. “What do you mean “finally” ?” you furrow your eyebrows, looking at Hobi for an explanation.
He scoffs, “Don’t act dense you two!” he laughs, “It was so obvious you two liked one another, you two were just too blind to see it yourselves,” he scolds both you and Jungkook by flicking your foreheads, “You just didn’t have to go confessing while all of us were freezing in here!”
Both you and Jungkook awkwardly laugh, a guilty look on one another’s face. “Well choo you two before I make you two clean everything up and babysit our friends!” Hobi makes a motion with his hands, and the two of you are quick to make your way upstairs into Jungkook’s room. Thankful that he didn’t punish the two of you.
Jungkook is quick to take off his puffy jacket, plopping himself onto the bed like a little kid, a loud breathy sigh following after. You stare at him for a moment, unsure of what to do, that is until you see him open his arms wide with a pout appearing on his face, “Come onnn,” he sings, “Let’s cuddle,” he shoots you a smile.
Playfully you roll your eyes before taking off your own jacket, plopping onto the spot next to him. Small feverish giggles escape your lips once he begins to give you tiny kisses all over, enveloping you in a hug so tight, it would’ve been impossible to ever doubt his feelings for you.
“Jungkook stop,” you laugh, the tickles he was now giving you making the sides of your stomach hurt, “Jung—” you attempt to push his hand away, face becoming red at just how much you were laughing, his own high-pitched laugh echoing across the walls of the room with you. From there he does a mixture of both tickling and kissing you, the two of you truly in your own world.
Soon though, your little game of tickles becomes a full on makeout session, not that you were complaining. Currently you lay under him with Jungkook leaning against you, using his arm that rested on the bed as support.
Slowly he slips his tongue into your mouth, gentle but demanding, nothing less than pure love behind the kiss. “Jungkooook,” you quietly whine once he begins to move onto your neck, every suckle lasting a little longer than the last. His hand interlocks with yours as he continues, you’re hand subconsciously playing with his hair from behind, making small twirls with the brown wavy locks of hair.
“I love youuu,” he cooes, a certain gleam to his eyes. Soon enough, his fingers were teasingly playing with the waistband of your leggings. And God, were you dripping. “Can I?” he innocently looks at you, licking his lips in the process. You’d be crazy to say no.
Nodding your head yes, he nudges your legs apart and begins to pull off the cotton fabric from your legs. You help him along the way, desperate to receive your own pleasure.
Teasingly, he swipes his index finger over the fabric of your underwear, continuing to pepper you with warm kisses on the underside of your jaw. The grip you had on his hair became tighter with every swipe, “Aren’t you wet?” he slyly chuckles, rubbing small circles with his placed finger.
“Stop teasing,” you whine, only causing him to muffle a laugh against your shoulder.
“I just wanna take my timeeeee,” he hums, placing a kiss to your cheek, “Can I take my time?” he pouts, only causing you to roll your eyes, agreeing nonetheless, “That’s my girl,” he whispers, pecking you on the lips before continuing, cupping your cheek with his … unoccupied … hand.
“God you’re beautiful,” he says staring at your pleasured expression, a result of the friction between his finger and your underwear becoming more intense.
“Jungkook,” your voice shakes, wanting needing him to do something before the muscles in your leg spasm any more.
“Shh shh not too loud,” he softly mumbles, because considering how drunk the boys’ were, any loud noise and you’d have someone idiotically stumbling into the room in order to find out whatever the noise was. Not wanting you to complain any more, he slips his finger under your underwear, pressing both his middle and index finger to the centerfold of your sex, “Look how wet you are,” he smirks, coaxing another moan from your lips.
Jungkook couldn’t lie, he’d envisioned this moment a couple of times before, but to have it becoming a reality was completely different than what he imagined. It was indeed better.
“I bet you’d love for me to take these off,” he teasingly pretends to pull down your panties, knowing exactly what he was doing.
“Please Jungkook,” you cry, how was it possible to already be on the verge of releasing when he hadn’t even done anything explicit yet? He begins to move his fingers up and down your clit, coating his fingers with your wetness, preparing to insert his fingers in your aching hole, “Please—” you attempt to whimper his name again, but his lips passionately kiss you before you get the chance to. It’s once he does that, that the energy in the room shifts, becoming one of playful teasingness to one of passion and love. It’s while he kisses you that he finally sinks his single finger into your pussy, your wetness helping him in gradually picking up the pace until soon enough he’s able to slip in another. Your moan being suppressed by the pressing of his lips against yours, softly nibbling on your lower lip.
“So fucking tight,” he mutters, the squelching sounds coming from your pussy bringing him a sense of pleasure, “Can’t wait to make love to you,” he whispers watching as your eyes lazily roll back, the sight being one he’d remember for a very long time.
“J—Just like that Jungkook,” you manage to stutter out, your arousal dripping in and out of your pussy as he continues with his motions. By now you feel his hardened member kneading against panties, his self-restraint holding on by a string. God, did he wanna fuck your brains out already. Had you been some kind of one night stand and he probably would already be doing so, but you, well you were different. You were his. And he was going to make sure you knew it to.
With his other hand he begins to slide his way under your shirt, caressing your breasts while fingering you, “Take off the shirt,” he mumbles while planting kisses on your neck, and you’re quick to obey, pulling the shirt over your head and uncaringly throwing it onto the floor.
By now you were dressed in only your underwear and bra, which to you seemed a bit unfair and so purposely you begin to play with the hem of his shirt, in hopes that he’d get the message. When he doesn’t, you momentarily stop him from kissing you any further, mumbling a tiny, “Mm take off your shirt,” causing him to let out a breathy laugh. He does as told, exposing the toned torso you’d find yourself frequently gawking over for in the past year. Because truly, his body proportions were insane.
Gently pulling him from his hair, you deepen the kiss by running your other hand across his bare back, the warm skin to skin touch providing another level of intimacy. “Let me eat you out,” he murmurs against your lips, waiting for a simple three letter word so that he can finally pull off your panties.
Instead you give him a small “MmHm,” with a small nod which in this case would suffice as he was sure you were too lost in your own world of pleasure to properly respond. Delicately he removes your underwear, parting your legs in between before lowering his head.
Without saying a word, he runs his finger against your slit, licking and sucking on the fluid that dripped from his finger. What. A. Fucking. Tease. “Jungkooook,” you whine like a brat, the heat you felt below almost unbearable at this point.
“What a pretty pussy,” he rasps, gives your clit a gentle kiss before suckling against it, his saliva mixing with your fluids. Immediately you feel a wave of pure bliss, your fingers slightly trembling at just how good the sudden sensation felt.
“Oh God Jungkook,” you needily whisper once he slips his finger back inside, pushing it deep into your core all while eating you out. Your breathy moans along with the sound of your wet pussy being toyed around with, fill the room. With your eyes half-open, you manage to look down at the sight of Jungkook licking through your folds, his messy hair covering most of his face until you use your hand to push it back, wanting to savor the view in front of you.
“Just look at you,” he groans, admiring the view of your back arched along with your thighs which slightly quivered at the flicks of his tongue, “All fucking mine, you got that?” he asks.
When you don’t respond, he inserts a second finger, catching your attention.
“Yes!” you cry at the sudden jolt of pleasure, his fingers scissoring inside of you, “I’m all yours,” you answer and to that he smirks, curling his fingers inside you. His ego at a level unthinkable. From there he continues to suck and slurp any remnants of your wetness, ignoring your warnings that you were about to orgasm.
It isn’t until he feels a quick rougher than usual tug to the hair followed with a gentle release that he knows you’ve came. Only then does he stop, quickly making his way to sweetly kiss you as you ride through your orgasm. You barely manage to kiss him back, too overwhelmed by orgasm he just brought down on you.
He cups your face once again, making out with you once again even if you were lazily kissing him back, “Jungkook,” you croak out, “Make love to me,” you dazedly whisper, recalling his words from earlier, and without a single word he begins to kiss you again, this time even more passionately (if that was possible) your words triggering a certain fire within him. And despite being in a post-orgasm state, you kiss him with just as much passion as he is doing to you.
By now the two of your hands’ were entangled with each others’ hair, Jungkook roughly pressing his clothed erection against the barity of your pussy. Releasing one of his hands from his hair, he smoothly travels down your back, removing the clasp of your bra with his hand. Deciding not to question his skills, you help further remove it until you’re only left completely nude. Your tits now on full display for him.
He soon begins to tenderly suck on your hardened nipples, one hand caressing the opposing tit whenever he was sucking on one, providing equal attention to both. You begin to play with the button of his black pants, desperately ready to have Jungkook completely inside you. Jungkook notices your lack of patience, deciding that just this time he’d give you what you want.
Pushing himself off you, he begins to unbutton his pants, your heart now beating out of excitement once you see the band of his black boxers. This was really happening. And though you’d seen Jungkook’s cock before, specifically with a woman having it wrapped inside her mouth, to see it this time around was definitely much more shocking than the first…. Was he always this big? The veins that run along his fair-colored cock only add to it’s intimidating appearance.
Pushing himself back on you, he sloppily kisses you all over, from your mouth to the side of your neck, slowly making his way downard. His cock teases the slit of your entrance, coaxing along the delicate folds of your pussy. Intertwining his hand with yours, he looks at you one last time, “You ready?” he breathes out.
Biting your lip, you slowly nod your head yes, his head then slowly pushing into your tight entrance, a groan coming from both of your lips, “God I fucking love you,” he breathily moans beside your ear.
“I love you too,” you whisper in return, his gaze never leaving yours as his cock tortuously enters you inch by inch, the grip you have on his hand tightening with every passing second, “Oh my god,” you whimper, his pre-cum along with your prior wetness making the push inside more bearable.
It isn’t until you’re completely filled up by his cock that he slowly begins to move. Each and every deep thrust garnerning both whines and mewls from you, “Fuck,” he moans, his voice raspy from pleasurable sensation he was feeling. Somehow he manages to continue to plaster kisses all over you, his hands tightly wrapped around your waist as he continues to grind his hips against yours, making nothing but love to you.
Your hot walls now take him with ease, the small pressure you had originally felt having slowly faded away. He keeps his thrusts at a moderate pace, wanting to savor the moment.
“J—Jungkook,” you cry out, feeling your second orgasm coming as you wrap your legs around his waist. He begins to pick up his pace, “Faster,” you moan, remembering that he was definitely okay with having rough sex, considering how many times you’d have to hear other woman moan just how harder they wanted back in the beginning of last year. Who said he couldn’t do the same for you?
“Faster?” he questions, a certain spark now in his eye, “You sure?” eagerly you nod your head yes, too lost in the idea of your possible orgasm to think of the repercussions of your answer. Because soon you find yourself getting completely fucked out, the pace of his thrust becoming almost uncomparable to the pace he was going before, this time not caring at all for rhythm. By now you're sure that your different number of cries and moans could be heard from downstairs, but honestly you could give less of a fuck.
The sound of your skin slapping with his echo against the wooden walls, your eyes screwing shut as you felt your high come. His rapid thrust continuing as he fucks you into oblivion, “Just look at you, creaming on my fucking cock,” he groans, by now sweat was forming on the creases of his forehead, “and to think I get to have you like this all to myself, every single day,” he chuckles, the tight feeling in his abdomen signalling to him that his own release was coming.
“Cum in me Jungkook,” you whine, and with that he does, his white milky cum coating your walls from the inside and out. He admires the view in front of him, the sight of you completely fucked out with his cum dripping from the entrance of your pussy, wondering how he got so lucky.
Out of breath, the two of you cuddle with one another, your eyes half closed, ready to knock out at any moment. But before you do, Jungkook peppers one last kiss onto your cheek, mumbling a final “I love you,” ready for the new memories this year would bring for the two of you.
a/n : ahhhhhh! finally finished with my finals so i was able to finally get this done! for some reason i sorta got attached to this couple, i think it’s because we got to see literally every month of their forming relationship so i just ended up really loving the dynamic between the two lmao. butttt all stories must come to an end :( and i’m very happy with how this story came out, but who knows maybe we’ll this couple again in the future. anywayssss like, reblog, comment, message me an anon or even directly! anything is appreciated (I swear im not a mean person) and ill see yall next time! 💞
mini taglist: @ggukkieland @unicornbabylover
#btswriterscollective#btswritingcafe#ficswithluv#bts fic#bts angst#bts smut#jungkook fic#jungkook fanfic#jungkook/reader#jungkook x reader#bangtan fanfic#jungkook two shot#jungkook one shot#jungkook complete fanfic#jungkook complete fic#safety net#Jeon Jungkook fanfic#Jeon Jungkook fanfiction#jeongguk fic#jeon jungkook#Jeongguk fanfic#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff
863 notes
·
View notes
Note
oh! its okay, i'll try to word it as close as possible to the first time.
may i please have the main group with a trans male reader who is stealth and kind of scared of how they'll react coming out to them?
(gosh i hope thats close enough, my memory is not the best,,)
thank you so much!!
thank you so so much for resending this!! I’m so sorry it got deleted the first time around, it was early in the morning and I wasn’t using my noggin when I was trying to draft it ;3;
for the kamaboko squad, I left it so it could be interpreted as romantic or platonic! for nezuko I did it more platonically, I hope that was ok! thank you for requesting and I hope these are enjoyable to read! I hope you’re well <3
꒰🌤꒱ — as it’s always been.
sfw scenarios + head-canons
➥ characters || kamado tanjirou, kamado nezuko, hashibira inosuke, agatsuma zenitsu
➥ warnings || none
➥ synopsis || the reader hesitantly comes out as trans to the kamaboko squad, nervous to what they’ll think and say; here is how they would react.
➥ kamado tanjirou:
- Tanjirou has a great sense of smell, so there’s no hiding your anxiety/nervousness about coming out. He’s most certainly going to ask you what’s wrong, nothing but concerned for your state of being.
- As you’re explaining and officially coming out to him, he’s very attentive; nodding and making sure you knew he was listening.
- He knows this must be very hard and nerve-wracking for you, so he lets you finish speaking before responding himself.
- Tanjirou, being the sweetheart he is, immediately reassures you that he thinks no different of you and still loves you through and through!
- If he’s honest, he’s a bit surprised. The boy definitely wasn’t expecting this, but regardless he’s very glad that you’re happy with who you are and honored that you trust him enough with this information.
- Expect lots of words of support and small actions of comfort/affection. Tanjirou immediately pulls you into a hug, rubbing your back as he tells you how proud he is of you, and how the information you told him will stay between you two (unless/until you tell the others; he knows it’s not in his place). He’d hold both your hands to his chest as he promises you that nothing has changed between the two of you, giving you his infamous gentle smile.
- Like he promised, nothing changes between you two. Everything is as it was before, and unless you want to talk about the topic at hand, he won’t even bring it up. It just goes to show he doesn’t mind what so ever and supports you all the way!
➥ kamado nezuko
- When it comes to Nezuko as a demon, she doesn’t really have a true understanding of anything that’s going on around her; she goes with her emotions and the emotions she’s picking up around her. Of course, she can tell when there’s danger and understand basic conversations. But other than that, all she really can understand is protect, sleep, and head pats.
- So you wouldn’t outright come out to her, knowing she probably wouldn’t understand regardless. It happens by accident, kind of.
- She spends her days in a dark room of the butterfly mansion as the others are healing, either sleeping or doing her own thing. You’re probably pacing around the room, trying to plan out how to officially tell the other boys and properly come out to them.
- Nezuko notices your distress from where she was playing with a handkerchief you gave to her after one of your missions.
- “Hmmmph!”
- In other words, she’s grabbing your attention, looking lost to why you’re pacing. In a “hey! what are you doing?” kind of way.
- When you didn’t notice her attempts, she huffs, hopping off the bed and making her way to you. She’s in her small form currently, trying to regain her energy but wanting to be awake to be in your company.
- You’d feel her tug at your uniform, making several muffled questionable noises at your pacing. If you tried to brush her off, telling her “it’s nothing”, she’s calling you out on your bull and tugging you to the bed.
- Sit criss-cross and watch her crawl into your lap as a toddler would do to an older sibling (for she saw you as another big brother), grabbing your arms and making it so you were hugging her.
- This gives you no room but to explain yourself, so you did. As you come out to her and explain how you’re nervous to tell the others, she’d.. not be the most understanding.
- Understanding as in she doesn’t comprehend what you’re telling her. But she does her best to listen, feeling how important this is to you and how anxious you’re reacting.
- She cuts you off of a nervous ramble of all the bad outcomes with a head-pat to your head, closing her eyes with a small “hmhmph!” coming from under her muzzle.
- Expect a good ole Kamado hug, tiny edition. And she’s not letting you go, not even when it was time for dinner.
- She calms you, knowing in your heart that even if she’s not completely aware, she still loves you and hopefully the others will as well (they will of course).
- Before you have to go, she grips onto your sleeve and pulls the muzzle off her mouth, giving you a sharp toothed smile. Before you can tell her to put it back on, that you don’t want anyone to see her with it off, but she gets one word out with the biggest beaming smile.
- “Oniisan!” (“Big Brother!”)
- .... and pats her head. She wants head pats too. Nothing’s changed, you’re still the best head pat giver she knows.
➥ !! spoilers for chapter 204 !! bonus: after the final battle, if you were to come out to a now human Nezuko, she’d react much like Tanjirou; just a lot more bubbly with more bright smiles. Unlike Tanjirou, she’d be more.. “aggressively” supportive. Basically, she wouldn’t hesitate to throw hands at anyone who says something purposely ignorant. It’s terrifyingly sweet; no one messes with her big brother.
➥ hashibira inosuke
- Inosuke has very sensitive skin, so he’s getting goosebumps from the anxiety your giving off. It annoys and confuses him, not understanding what’s going on for you to be so nervous.
- “Oi! You’re making my skin prickly!! Stop that!!”
- It’s his way of asking what’s wrong, wanting to know how to stop it.
- Your anxiety hits an all time high as you let it out, officially coming out to him.
- ... But he doesn’t know what “trans” means, so he’s confused. He stands there, blinking under his pig mask.
- “... What? What the hell is that?” He may sound brash, but he just hates not understanding things. He wants to understand more than everyone else, after all, so don’t take it personally.
- After a long bit of explaining it clearly to him, you two are sitting on the ground, Inosuke with his hands in his lap as he stares at you.
- He’s surprisingly silent the whole way through, and not being able to see his true facial expression just makes you all the more nervous.
- If you were to nervously ask him to take his mask off, you were expecting a hard no. What you weren’t expecting was for him to hesitate for only a moment before taking it off, setting it down in to his lap.
- Inosuke’s eyebrows would be furrowed, his mouth turned down as he looked at you closely. Bracing yourself, he responded.
- “So?”
- That definitely isn’t what you would be expecting.
- Now he didn’t mean this in any negative connotation at all. He fully understands what it means now and what you told him - and to note he’s completely fine with it - he’s just confused to why it’s such a big deal. (If anything he respects you even more, finding you extremely strong.)
- Inosuke doesn’t care how you were born or what you choose to be; at the end of the day you’re his favorite sparring partner! Plus, he has to keep you around. He wants to understand the warm fuzzies he gets in his tummy when you do nice things for him.
- “Doesn’t matter what you are, I can still kick your ass!!” He says as he tackles you to the ground.
- All’s well ends well, and much like Tanjirou, it seems nothing would change between you two.
➥ agatsuma zenitsu
- The high-pitched anxiety sound emitting from you is giving Zenitsu a headache; he’ll make sure to complain about it loudly so you know.
- If you apologized for it while fidgeting, he’ll soften his whining tone and ask why you’re so nervous anyways? It’s day, so it’s not like you have demons to fear.
- You hesitate, stuttering around the topic before officially coming out, explaining that to him and why you’re so nervous.
- Zenitsu.. definitely was not expecting that. He’d go wide-eyed, clearly shocked at the information.
- “HUH??? YOU’RE WHAT???”
- If you were to flinch at his shouts, he’d pause and look to you; watching how you curled up on yourself, scared you looked for a bad reaction.
- Instead he immediately goes to reassure you.
- “IM SORRY!! I-I didn’t mean it like that!! PROMISE! I just wasn’t expecting that!! I wouldn’t ever have guessed!!- I MEAN-!!” He’s talking way to fast for you to even understand, so the more you looked lost the more Zenitsu feared he messed up the trust you must’ve had for him in order to tell him that.
- Eventually he’d break down, getting on his hands and knees while bowing his head to the floor, gripping your pant leg all while begging you to forgive him.
- You’re the one who originally needed comfort here, not him. Smh Zenitsu.
- In all seriousness, reassure him that he’s ok. He meant no harm by his reaction, he just tends to be over-dramatic with his reactions and emotions.
- Once he’s calm, he’d sniffle and be sitting next to you, shoulder to shoulder.
- Zenitsu gives it a few minutes before asking questions, making sure he’s understanding 100% and not getting anything wrong.
- The blonde-boy knows about how hard struggles in life can be; he’s struggled his whole life when it comes to finding a home and a place of belonging, being homeless for the first 3/4’s of the life he’s lived so far. He knows he can’t compare his struggles to the things you must’ve gone through, but he can clearly and easily sympathize.
- He reassures you that he thinks no different of you, if anything he admires the way you could be so brave about it.
- It’s a quiet moment between the two of you as Zenitsu continues his rambles (still scared he ruined whatever is between you two a moment ago), circling over the same couple topics; how he supports you, will support you through anything, that he sees you no differently and that nothing will change.
- Please place your hand over his mouth or he’ll keep going all day; his anxiety rambles are said to last hours.
- This has only made you two closer, the others finding you and Zenitsu sticking/hanging around each other more and more frequently. In the end, your happy you told him.
#꒰👒꒱ — requests.!#꒰🌤꒱ — demon.slayers.!#sfw#scenarios#requests#kny#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#kny x reader#demon slayer x reader#kimetsu no yaiba x reader#kny x trans reader#demon slayer x trans reader#kimetsu no yaiba x trans reader#kny reader insert#demon slayer reader insert#kimetsu no yaiba reader insert#kamado tanjirou#kamado tanjirou x reader#kamado nezuko#kamado nezuko and reader#hashibira inosuke#hashibira inosuke x reader#agatsuma zenitsu#agatsuma zenitsu x reader
154 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fingers and Toes // H.P.
Request: heyy!! i’m not sure if you still take requests but i was wondering if you could write a harry fic as a dad? like make it all fluffy and stuff like that? thanku!! - anon
Summary: Glimpses into Harry’s life as a father.
A/N: I adore this request! Thank you so much for sending it, I hope you like!! Also I made some changes to canon, so in this there are only two children, not three.
Warnings: mentions of pregnancy, mentions of injury and nightmares. This is nothing but wholesome fluff.
Word count: 1.6k
On the eve that Harry became a father, he couldn’t quite believe the size of his son’s fingers and toes.
Ten tiny fingers.
Ten tiny toes.
As a whole hand of tiny fingers wrapped around one of Harry’s, Harry made a silent vow.
This vow he made as he glanced between his newborn son and you, sleeping peacefully after an intense delivery. This vow he made to remind himself of the importance of family.
The ten fingers and ten toes of his newborn son would never once experience the level of pain he had. His son would never go through the emotional torment of never knowing his parents; his son would never experience true loneliness.
Harry made the vow in utter silence, sealing it with a kiss to his son’s head. As if in response to the promise made, his son squeezes his father’s finger, gripping it with all the strength in one of his tiny hands.
Ten fingers, ten toes. All perfect, and all there.
-------
It’s a huff and a cry that follows that has Harry rushing from the kitchen into the back garden. Harry’s heart stops at the sight of his son sprawled on the floor; fat tears running down his face more from shock than pain.
He brushes his son down, checking for any major injuries as he does so. His heart returns to a normal rhythm once he realises that James is entirely uninjured, suffering shock more than anything.
“How many fingers, James?” Harry asks; reaching out brush the tears away from James’ face.
“Ten.”
“How many toes?”
“Ten.”
Harry kisses his son’s hair, “Ten fingers, ten toes. We’re ready to go. Do you feel better?”
James nods; wiping away the last of his tears and smiling shakily up at his father. Harry smiles back at his son; lifting him under the arms and settling him on his hip. “I think we’ve had enough of the outside for now,” Harry comments softly, “Will you help me make lunch, James?”
James nods once more, tucking his small head into the crook of Harry’s neck. Harry chuckles softly, heading back inside where he settles his son on a stool at the kitchen counter.
“What will it be, James? A sandwich or some soup?”
“Soup!” His son shouts, a smile on his face as Harry grabs the tins from the cupboard and sets the pan on the stove.
You enter the kitchen, pressing a lingering kiss to Harry’s cheek before dropping a kiss to James’ head. “What’s happening here?”
“Lunch Mama!”
You laugh, “I can see that. What are we having?”
“Soup,” Harry states.
Harry watches you with a warm smile. You pick up your son, settling on his stool before sitting James on your lap. Harry thinks back to his teenage years; to the years that he didn’t know whether he would make it through the school year never mind make it to having a family.
The rich laughter of his son brings Harry back from his memories; fetches harry back from the precipice in which he found himself teetering. He lets himself have his small panic; Harry lets himself fall prey to the anxiety that has unfurled in his gut. But he only lets it keep hold of him for the amount of time it takes him to count the fingers and toes on his son.
Ten fingers, ten toes. Harry’s mind calms and his smile returns to his face.
Ten fingers, ten toes. All will be well.
--------
Harry lurches upright. A hand to his throat as he drags in air; his mind rattled and his body shaking. It had felt so real. It had been real; he had experienced his nightmare before as a teenager, but now, knowing he had much more to lose, it felt even more terrifying.
He glances over to your sleeping body; a hand outstretched towards him even in sleep. His eyes run over you; watching your sleeping form rise and fall as breath leaves your body. Harry’s mind settles slightly as he sees you’re alive and with him. The silver wedding band on your left hand signally a happy future from the nightmare he had found himself in.
Harry presses a kiss to your forehead, brushing your hair back from your face before leaving you in bed. He shives against the cold air of the night; the landing freezing as Harry sits at the top of the stairs, hanging his head in his hands.
He knows logically that there is no threat now; he vanquished it years ago and there had been no signs of another uprising since. Yet, Harry spends most nights having to repress the urge to stand guard by the front door, wand at the ready for whomever should come crashing through posing a threat to his wife and his son.
James stands by his door; his teddy hanging from his hand as Harry tries to settle his breathing and heartbeat.
“Daddy?” He asks, voice quiet yet ringing through the silent house.
“James,” Harry says, a hand reaching for his son.
James goes into his arms willingly, yawning tiredly as he settles his head against his father’s shoulder. James doesn’t say a lot, even this young he knows that his father struggles to sleep on some nights. He had found him asleep on the couch downstairs more often than not, a blanket thrown haphazardly over his body as James hears his mother soft humming from the kitchen.
“How many fingers?” James asks, stumbling over the harder sounds in the words.
Harry swivels to face his son; the question being the last thing he expected.
“Ten, James.”
“How many toes?” James follows, kicking his feet in the air for emphasis.
The weight on Harry’s chest feels lighter as he answers his son, “Ten, James.”
Ten fingers, ten toes. James reminds Harry – ten fingers, ten toes, and we’re ready to go. As long as we have all ten fingers and all ten toes, we can do just about anything, even if it is defeating the terrors that haunt us at night.
-------
The very same vow is made when Lily Luna Potter arrives in the world on a sunny March morning. Harry felt sure that he had the same awe-filled expression on his face from when he first held James.
The pregnancy had not come as a shock to either you or Harry. The both of you had been trying for a second child for close to a year before being blessed with a positive test.
The nerves do not rack Harry as much as they did before James arrived. However, they still turn his stomach as he watches you go through the same experiences of morning sickness followed by odd cravings. For James, it had been chocolate with cheese and onion crisps. For Lily, it had been crackers slathered with butter followed by plain digestive biscuits.
Harry crinkled his nose at all cravings, but kept his mouth shut for fear of upsetting you. He would reassure your worries as you would reassure his. The both of you looking to James as an example that so far, neither of you had failed at parenting. The small boy turning into young child that knew his manners and was devoted to his mother.
It is James who whispers the vow. He stands over the cot of his baby sister, eyes wide in awe at the small bundle of blankets. He turns to his father; catching his attention from whatever conversation he was having with you.
“Ten fingers and ten toes,” James whispers, pointing to Lily’s hands and feet.
“Ten fingers and ten toes,” Harry states, the vow unleashed to the world and sealed with the very same kiss he had placed upon James’ head all those years ago.
----------
The Hogwarts’ Express hoots behind them. James looks toward the train before fixing his tear-filled gaze on his father. Harry is barely keeping it together himself; the first of his three children to be going away to school. He knew he would be emotional; he just didn’t prepare himself for the pit of dread eating its way through his stomach lining.
Harry reaches out to ruffle his son’s hair. His first born; his eldest – the one who made him a father, who had moulded him into the man he is today.
“Write to your mother and I when you get settled?”
James nods. “As soon as I get to my room,” He replies, voice quiet.
“Do not be scared of whatever house you are sorted in. Your mother and I love you either way.”
A weight is lifted off of James’ shoulder; he had been silently obsessing over that since the letter first arrived. His father, the great Harry Potter, was known for his strong allegiance to the house of Godric. James couldn’t help but panic if he was to be sorted into any other house; he didn’t want to think of his father’s reaction should he be sorted into Slytherin.
Harry pulls James into a hug; unable to let his son go without one more. As they part, Harry pats James on the shoulder, nodding towards the open carriage door, silently letting him know that it’s okay now. It’s okay to let go and board the train.
James does so with a wobbling lip; trying his best not to cry in front of those who could be his housemates for the formative years of his life.
“Fingers and toes,” Harry shouts, not caring about the odd looks from the other parents. These were his final verbal words to his son until Christmas. He would make sure they were those that he vowed over his cradle when he was only a few hours old.
James sticks his head out of the carriage window. “Fingers and toes!” He cries, throwing the promise back to Harry.
He would return in one piece.
All ten fingers and all ten toes.
*******
General (HP) taglist: @chaotic-fae-queen @theweasleysredhair @harrypotter289 @kalimagik @heloisedaphnebrightmore @nebulablakemurphy @figlia--della--luna @idont-knowrn @liilyevanss @big-galaxy-chaos @black-lake-confessions @annasofiaearlobe @imboredandneedalife @levylovegood @mytreec @haphazardhufflepuff @teheharrypotter @chaoticgirl04 @accio-rogers @starlightweasley @dreaming-about-fanfictions @lestersglitterglue @msmimimerton @obx-beach @izzytheninja @slytherinprincess03 @bbeauttyybbx @breadqueen95 @acciotwinz @kashishwrites @slytherinsunrise @kylosleftbuttcheek @remmyswritings @xfirstfemale-marauderx @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon @ria-rests-here @inglourious-imagines @superbturtlemakerathlete @ithilwen-lionheart @now-its-time-for-a-breakdown @ilovejjmaybank
461 notes
·
View notes
Text
regarding romance!
╒══════════════════╕
Used artwork credits
Hop
Bede
Leon
Raihan
╘══════════════════╛
———☆️
Hop🍀
It started as the cliché love story about falling in love with your very own bestfriend
Which, actually turned out great??
His Zacian/Zamazenta loves you as much as it's trainer does, and is willing to protect you from anything
Probably because it observed Hop being protective over you, and proceeding to do the same
Sure it might took a toll on him when you defeated him on the championship semi-finals, but he wanted you to be happy more than anything
He's such a sweetheart even if he doesn't show it much
The type to appreciate small little things, especially when it comes from you
"Let's camp together!!"
You camped together
He got chased by a wild steelix whilst trying to gather data for his research later
His Zamazenta/Zacian was busy playing with your own legendary
*from the distance* "GAH! HELP!"
You ran after him and calmed down the wild steelix
Then you walked to him and checked if he got any wounds or scratches, which leads you to cupping his face gently with a worried look on your face
Hop's blushing
He's freaking out inside
You didn't notice the tint of blush dusting his cheeks,which gradually reddens with each second that passes
"im okay, dont worry" he tried his best reassuring you
Even though he's blushing, he proceeded to press his forehead gently against yours, closing his eyes and smiling
oh no he's cute
You're blushing
haha blushy reader
You let him do his thing, its somewhat calming
He's warmm
His hands are calloused, different from yours; you just remembered this when he placed his hand on top of yours while you were checking for his wounds from before
This just shows how much he's been working off to reach the champion title
And yet he's completely alright with you taking the spotlight
After all, you're his shining star
And he wouldn't have it in any other way
You let him borrow your champion cape
And he lets you borrow his labcoat
It fits just right with you! And it got his scent, which calms you down whenever you're feeling anxious
When you wear his labcoat, you're 1000000000% irresistible to his eyes
"Don't be so adorableee" he said as he pulled you into a hug and burying his face in your neck
You only laughed softly at his reaction. He was blushing too,,,
You often waited for him to finish his lab work, even if it's until late hours
He's a really hard worker, no wonder he stayed until late
"Im sorry for making you wait"
He looks exhausted, but tried his best to pull a bright smile, not wanting to worry you
You only gave him a warm hug, which surprised him at first before he hugs you back and proceed to walk you to your house
💓💓💓 < your heart
Comfort time
There's usually some jerks who'd tease you for being the champion, or flirt with you in an impolite way
If Hop caught on to this, he would politely ask them to leave
If they still dont understand, his legendary comes out of his pokeball and growl at them
He'd ask them one more time to stop bothering you, but this time, with a menacing smile that says "stay here any longer and you wont get to see another daylight"
Then he'd check up on you, asking if you're alright, if they did anything to you or whatnot
Hed wrap his arms around your waist and drape his labcoat over you, because he knows his labcoat always manages to calm you down
"It's okay, you're okay, everything is alright now, c'mere"
You let him hug you as you feel safe around him, and you two stayed in that position until you feel alright again
💕💕
———☆️
Bede🍰
He's not the best at showing affection but at least he tries
You help him come out with quizzes for his gym challenge
And sometimes joke about the poses he makes when practicing
Sometimes, he gets reminded that you're the champion of Galar and he's way out of your trainer level
Which actually motivates him to become the strongest gym leader there is by pushing past his limits
"I'll show you how strong fairy types can be"
He said to himself as he was thinking about you
People kept misunderstanding fairy types after all, and thats a big mistake
You appreciate his efforts in maxing out his strength, and you show it by coming to his fairy stadium whenever he battles a challenger
You texted him "good luck, I'll be cheering 4 u!❤️❤️👍" before his matches start
And you looked at his direction after sending the message
He has just gotten your message, and opened it
Which leads to him blushing furiously as he covers his face with one of his hands
He took a deep breath and tried to regain his composure, only to fail miserably when he saw you looking at his direction with pure ambition and determined eyes as you grinned happily
All that i could say is, he's red as a beet
He wont lose this match, not when you're watching him.
He puts extra effort when you're watching his match, and made sure not to slip up. It'd be embarrassing if he did.
Opal notices this and only smiled seeing her successor acting out of his place whenever you're around
Opal knows something that you dont, and that's Bede's feelings for you
After his match ended, his Hatterene walked towards your direction, pulling you into a tight hug
You were surprised, but apparently Hatterene has grown to like you ever since she first met you
And when you look at Bede's direction, he was looking away with his arms crossed infront of his chest, visibly drowning in embarassment
,,,you wondered, is Bede projecting on his Hatterene or what,
Yes, yes he is
So you asked him if he also wants a hug, which of course he answered with "Why would i want a hug from someone like you? That'd be an insult to me"
You let go of Hatterene and hugged him anyways
He flinched when you hugged him, not knowing where to put his hands and just let them stay still in a defensive pose
Hatterene watched with a smile from behind you, seeing her master in such a flustered state was truly something new for the Pokemon
Not long after, Bede finally let his arms wrap around your waist, giving in to his subconscious and just hug you
he wanted to hug you anyways so thats a win win situation
You were actually surprised when he hugged you back
He smells nice!! Like perfume?? Cologne?? Floral scent
His Hatterene decided to join in and wrapped her arm around you both, making you all hug even more tightly
Bede cant handle this well.
No, not at all.
His face was really red and its hot— in all honesty, its cute, but he was burning
"Why do you have to embarrass me like this?"
You buried your face in his neck, which startled him as he couldn't think at all
"Y-you!!"
He feels nice and soft, so you're not planning to let go any sooner, likewise with Hatterene.
Bede's mind: ASDFGHJKL????—GODDAMMI—
OKAY NOW COMFORT TIME
His true nature would come out when you're not feeling yourself or when people would makw you feel like shit
"Hey.."
His face shows concern, but it still his usual look of coldness— however, his actions are warm despite his cold features
He'd let you wear his coat as he battles anyone who dared to hurt you
"Are you alright now..?"
He cupped your face and made you look at his face, swiping off the tears that stained your face with his thumbs delicately
He hated seeing you cry, and he'll try better next time to make sure you didn't cry
———☆️
Leon🌟
He's kind at all but sometimes he's just... "???????"
Training!! Dates!!
More like battle tower dates because he really admires your strength as a champion
Occasionally, he'd visit your house and check up on you, wondering if you're free for the day for "quality time"
At first, he was surprised to see one of the legendaries answering the door for you
And he couldn't resist to ruffle it's hair
your legendary on the other hand was kind of irritated by it
So it let out a displeased howl
Which leads you to come down stairs and see who is it
"L—leon?"
He looked up and greet you with a goofy grin as your legendary returned to your side, walking with you
He treats you like a gentleman, and sometimes is very strict with your training regimen
In which you usually whine about because you're the current champion and you have no business listening to him
But he'd swoon you with lovely words
And you would easily fall for it
you hate this
You hate him
No you dont
You love him, you could never hate a goofball like him anyways
Hey did i ever mention Leon's sense of direction is shitty
You went on a date in Wyndon a couple of times and he still gets lost everytime
"Ah!! Hey—....."
"Im lost again aren't i?"
He tried to find his way back to you but got surrounded by paparazzis
Even if he's not the current champion
You saved his butt since he couldn't say no to the people and his fans
He said thank you and hugged you, lifting you up to the air before pulling you close to him
This only made you laugh softly as you hugged him back, letting your fingers comb his thick lavender like hair
His body is warm and comforting, you really like his cuddles and hugs
He came into your house one time when you didn't answer his calls or messages, only to find you drown in your anxiety and self loathing
He pulled you in his arms and let you cry on his shoulder until you're all done and alright again
He'd draw circles over your back and tell you reassuring words— tell you that you're more than enough and he's grateful to have you here, alive and well
Your Zacian/Zamazenta got out of it's pokeball and helped you in calming you down too by giving you small licks on your knee
It'd whine whenever you're sad and climb onto your bed, nudging your arm afterwards as if it's asking what's wrong
You're lucky to have them both whenever you need them the most, and they're lucky to have you
———☆️
Raihan 🐲
It's finally the Character y'all been waitin for, dragon boi coming through
Okay serious talk here— Raihan is TALL
His hoodies makes you look smaller than you already are
You tried copying his "Gaooo~" pose a couple of times while wearing his hoodie
Its cutest thing he has ever seen his entire life
It makes him melt everytime
Okay aside from that, he's gentle and laid back, even if his personality is quite the opposite when he's on battle
He's cLINGY ASF
Don't forget his fangs, never forget his fangs
You're actually curious about his fangs since the first day you saw him
And he lets you touch it whenever you like
Youre still curious, because what the hell, its so cool
The first day you saw him after defeating him in a match and gain your gym badge, he immediately took an interest in you and your strength
"Hey Challenger!"
He called you before you tried to take your leave, gaining your attention
He then asked you if you want to practice with him next time, and have a rematch when you've become the champion
You agreed and exchanged numbers
What can i say, he spams you like?????? A lot
And casually sends you pictures of him and his duraludon
You love his dragons, especially flygon
Flygon loves you too, and one time it wanted to come with you
Raihan lets you keep his Flygon and you send him pictures of you with it
He sends emotes of duraludon crying, wanting to join you and your fun trip with Flygon to grab the Champion title
After you took the Champion title, Raihan greeted you with a big hug
And you hug him back with no hesitation
"Congratulations, may i have a selfie with the new Champion?"
He asked in a teasing manner, letting you down on your feet as you nodded
You took a selfie selfwith him numerous times before he posted it to his social media
He captioned 'First person to get a selfie with the new Champion'
He took pride in that, and some of his fans were jealous that you managed to get a selfie with him
From that day onwards, he'd have casual selfies with you, sometimes hilarious one and sometimes its just for showing off
You didn't mind it really, he's a celebrity anyways, so you understand why he does that
"Hey.. do stars have feelings"
It was three am what the fuck Raihan
You squinted at your screen seeing his message
"Why in the Galar would you be awake, dear Dragon tamer?"
You answered him
And immediately he answered "oh? The Champion is awake?"
You guys didn't sleep afterwards and was sending streaks of blurry selfies
It was fun and helped you cheer up
You got some of his blurry pics that he captioned "party rock in the house" when clearly its just him and his pokemons
What a goofball pt.2
You love him anyways shut up
Haha smol reader pt.2
#pokemon#pokemon sword and shield#pokemon sw sh#pokemon imagines#Raihan#Bede#Hop#Leon#Raihan/kibana#Raihan pokemon#Bede/biito#Bede pokemon#Hop pokemon#Leon pokemon#Raihan x reader#Raihan x gender neutral reader#Raihan x male reader#Raihan x nonbinary reader#Bede x reader#Bede x male reader#Bede x gender neutral reader#Hop x reader#Hop x male reader#Hop x gender neutral reader#Pokemon swsh#Pokemon sword#Pokemon shield#Headcanons#Pokemon headcanons
559 notes
·
View notes
Text
time travel snippet
little time travel au oneshot. season 5 jon travels back in time to season 1. from the perspectives of tim, martin, and sasha. 3.5k.
i dont think i need to tag anything, but please let me know otherwise.
Tim wakes up that morning, and it’s just like any other day.
Well—no, okay, that’s a bit misleading. Today is his first day working as an archival assistant, so he’s one part nervous, one part that breathless, exhilarated feeling you only get when you’re about to do something unfamiliar that may or may not redefine your life for the foreseeable future. When he says “it’s just like any other day”, he means that he wakes up, and he’s a normal person doing normal people things like eating a healthy breakfast and going to work.
(So, no. In short, he doesn’t realize that today is the day when It happens, that big, life-changing event that you think will Never Happen To You.)
He gets out of bed, stumbles into the bathroom. Washes his face of whatever residue that’d built up during the night, tries to scrape away the evidence of his nightmares, smiles big and bright at the mirror to see how successful his efforts were. He’s betrayed by the traitorous bags beneath his eyes, but that’s okay. Sasha taught him how to wield concealer as a shield whenever his past wore down his armor.
He shoots twin finger guns into his reflection, making soft pew, pew! noises that are almost too-loud in the hush of the bathroom. Then he turns on his heel and walks away, sauntering and humming along with the chorus of Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5.
He gets to the Institute twenty minutes before he’s supposed to—not because he’s trying to impress his boss or whatever (he and Jon have known each other long enough that there’s no point). It’s just, Jon will probably want to make some sort of game-plan before the actual workday starts.
The poor man had been relieved to an almost comical degree when Tim had said yes, I’ll come with you to the Archives. It’s painfully obvious how out-of-his-depth Jon is with the whole “Head Archivist” thing. Tim’s honestly baffled as to why Elias had singled him out for the position in the first place, considering his lack of qualifications.
But, whatever. It’s fine! Tim and Sasha will be there to help him—although the third assistant is a bit of a problem, considering that they know absolutely nothing about him. There’s no guarantee that this Martin Blackwood won’t report inadequacies or mistakes back to Elias. If that’s the case, Tim and Sasha will have to be Jon’s safety net, which is partially why Tim is hoping to talk to Jon before anyone else gets there.
He also wants to talk to Jon because he just knows the man is probably working himself up over all of this. Maybe reassurances won’t do away with the source of anxiety entirely, but at least it’ll remind Jon that he’s not alone, and that he can count on Tim and Sasha.
As expected, when Tim gets there he can see a sliver of light pouring out from the cracked door of the Head Archivist’s office. He selects a desk and sets his bag on top of it, noting a set of strange gouges in the fake wood with a raised eyebrow, and then an internal shrug. The Institute issued laptop is near the far edge of his desk, and his collection of pictures are strategically placed so that he can see them all clearly.
His eyes linger over the image of him, his mother, and his brother. Their smiles are almost perfect replicas of each other, like someone took a mold of one of their faces and recreated it twice over.
Briefly, he closes his eyes. Then he shakes himself, releases a slow, steadying breath, and goes to check on Jon.
Tim’s not sure what he’s expecting to see when he goes into Jon’s office.
(That’s misleading too, though. He’s not sure if Jon will be visibly calm or upset, if he’ll be on his laptop, if he’ll be picking at the skin around his fingernails, as he so often does when he’s stressed. He is expecting Jon as he is and always has been—a twenty-some year old going on sixty, who wraps his gruff, grumpy demeanor about himself to protect the soft, vulnerable core he likes to pretend doesn’t exist.)
He comes up to the door, and the soft rectangle of light that emanates from beneath the door paints the tips of his shoes gold. “Jon?” he calls softly, rapping his knuckles against the frame. There’s a soft rustling noise—papers maybe? but no audible response, so he shrugs and pushes the door open. “I’m coming in.”
Tim steps inside, a quip instinctively readying itself on his tongue—but then his gaze lands on Jon, and he freezes dead in his tracks.
Even years later, he still vividly, viscerally remembers the moment he saw Danny standing on the stage underneath the Royal Opera House, the way he’d looked...not quite right. The wrongness had been subtle, so much so that it had been unnoticeable upon first glance, upon second glance. The longer Tim had looked though, the more obvious it had become, exposing all the little faults in that almost-perfect recreation of his brother.
Looking at Jon now, it’s the first and only thing he can think of. Because—yes, there’s the long, silver-streaked black hair, there’s the rich brown eyes, there’s the pair of spectacles that make him look far older than he actually is. But that’s where the similarities between the Jon he knows and this Jon end.
Jon’s always been a small man, but his feigned haughtiness makes him seem much bigger than he actually is. Except—except this Jon looks smaller somehow, his shoulders curved protectively inward, like he’s trying to present less of a target. And there’s something about his face, too—his expression is too sharp, too much—
But the worst of it is his eyes. There’s something very wrong with his eyes.
Who the fuck are you, and what have you done with Jon? He doesn’t say it out loud though, just keeps staring at Jon, a heady mix of terror and horror making any sort of reaction impossible.
After a moment Jon’s lips thin, contorted by some distant cousin of displeasure, and he rises to his feet. Tim stumbles instinctively backward, his breath escaping him in a sharp gasp that’s immediately swallowed up by the apathetic stacks of books and papers surrounding them. He’s struck by the fact that if he dies here, it’s unlikely anyone will notice; he’ll become just another set of marks gouged into the desk, willed away with an uneasy shrug.
Jon freezes, lips parting subtly, as though he were about to speak. Tim feels his breath catch in his chest, unable to shake himself out of the clouded stupor his mind has fallen into.
In the end, Jon says nothing. Just releases a long, slow breath of air and sits back down, pushing his chair close to his desk. The motion looks heavy, tired, as though it takes far more energy than it should.
“You—you should go,” Jon rasps, and there’s something off about his voice too, though Tim can’t put his finger on why. He can’t cobble together enough of a train of thought to make sense of any of this, all he can think of is that clown ripping Danny apart—
He stumbles out of Jon’s office, sits down at his desk. Stares down at the cheap, fake wood, at the gouges that have marred the otherwise pristine surface. Puts his head in his hands, and tries to will his heart to stop pounding in his chest.
-0-
Martin’s heard things about Jonathan Sims.
He’s not usually the type to pay attention or encourage gossip, as the vivid memories of his classmates tittering cruelly whenever he walked by still leaves a sour taste in his mouth.The problem with the Institute is that the employees get bored pretty easily. Though most would consider academic research into the esoteric and the paranormal to be fairly interesting, it’s still academic research. And the subject content can get to be a bit...repetitive. There’s only so many gruesome statements you can read without thinking, oh great, more meat.
So the employees gossip a lot, and while Martin usually tries to keep his head down and avoid it, it’s difficult not to overhear some things. And from what little he’s heard, he’s...a bit concerned. Rude and unsociable has frequently been mentioned, as have arrogant and unnecessarily finicky, and worst of all, a bit of a stuck-up know-it-all.
Normally he tries not to put too much stock in office gossip—he’s well aware that the grapevine tends to exaggerate one’s most undesirable traits—but if any of it is true, then he might just be in trouble. It was hard enough being a library employee when his boss wasn’t even paying attention most of the time. If Jon is as exacting as they say, it might be enough to expose the fact that Martin has no idea what the fuck he’s doing. And if that happens, then he might get fired, and he can’t get fired, he needs this job, he can barely keep up with his mum’s medical bills as it is—
Calm down, Martin tells himself firmly, pressing his hand against his sternum, as though that will be enough to quell the rising panic. It’s only your first day. Maybe he’s nice, and we’ll actually be good friends.
(With his luck? Yeah, right.)
The Institute looms in the distance, growing closer with every terrified, grudging footstep. A shiver runs up his spine at the sight of its imposing presence, a dark, ugly blot of a building against the backdrop of the iron grey clouds.
If there’s one thing he’s good at though, it’s keeping his head down and muddling through until he’s able to figure out what is actually expected of him. He can twist and fold himself into whatever role they need him to fill, as he has done so many times in the past. Not easily perhaps, but he has always managed. The alternative is untenable, after all.
So he takes a deep breath, and shoves his panic down as deep as possible. Lifts his head and forces a smile onto his face, like a good attitude will be enough to protect him from his boss’s wrath.
He could really do with a cup of tea.
Martin trudges down the stairs, giving the blank walls, the old-fashioned carpet, a dubious look as he does. The Archives themselves are as he remembers it—he’s been down here a couple of times when Gertrude made a request for something specific, but—
He pauses when he notices a man sitting at one of the desks, his face buried in his hands. His shoulders aren’t shaking and his breathing is even, so Martin doesn’t think that he’s crying? He’s just….sitting there, his stillness so perfect it’s almost inhuman.
“Hello?” Martin calls softly, cautiously, shifting his weight to the balls of his feet.
The man looks up, revealing a very handsome face and brown eyes so dark they may as well be black. His cheeks are dry but his eyes are bright and a little wild, and his mouth is pressed into a small, tight line. He doesn’t speak, just keeps watching, blinking dazedly in Martin’s direction. Martin gets the feeling that this person isn’t entirely there at the moment, like a house in which every room is lit, but there are no people inside.
He swallows and shifts nervously back and forth, trying to decide whether or not to call for some backup. Eventually he sets his bag on the floor and shuffles a bit closer. “Um—are you—is everything okay?”
The man blinks rapidly, some semblance of awareness creeping back into his gaze. He shakes his head slowly, pushes his short, gelled hair back from his head. His hands are trembling. “I’m...yeah, I’m fine. It’s—everything’s, it’s…”
But then his gaze lands on something over Martin’s shoulder, and all the color drains out of his face, his mouth shutting with a painful sounding click. Martin quickly spins around, searching for whatever could’ve scared him so much—
There’s someone standing in the doorway of Gertrude’s office.
There are so many things that one normally takes in upon first meeting another person: their hair, their skin color, all the little wrinkles and marks that give you the briefest insight into their life. Martin looks at posture first, tends to check if a person is intentionally looming, or if they’re making themself smaller.
But all Martin can see are the eyes.
There’s—two of them he thinks, but two is such an arbitrary number when the thing you’re applying it to doesn’t ascribe to human values (he’s not sure how he knows that—how does he know that—?). That horrible, terrible gaze is an unerring arrow, all-encompassing, all-consuming, piercing the deepest corners of his mind. It hurts in some distant, nebulous way he’s not even sure he comprehends—
Then he blinks, and the sheer terror, that feeling of the horrible, violating exposure of everything that he is, abruptly snuffs out. What’s left is just a person, wispy and small, his slight frame fairly drowning in a chunky, cable-knit jumper. He’s leaning against his doorframe, his eyes—two big brown ones, rich and unfathomably sad and more than that, human—drinking Martin in, his lips parted in a soundless gasp.
“Um—” Martin glances over his shoulder, and almost leaps out of his skin when a land falls heavily on his shoulder. The man who’d been sitting in the chair is standing just behind him, a strained but polite smile on his face.
“Hi Jon,” the man says, an undercurrent of a warning in his voice.
Martin glances between the two, his confusion growing with every passing moment. This is not what he was expecting when he first came into work today, and the uncertainty makes him feel strange and off-kilter.
The person in the door swallows once, twice, then straightens, one hand still gripping the doorframe like it’s the only thing keeping him upright. When he speaks, his voice is soft, tentative, a little ragged around the edges. “Tim. It’s, um...it’s good to see you.”
“Martin Blackwood, was it?” Tim continues, injecting a bit of cheer into his voice. It takes Martin a moment to realize that he’s being addressed, and he shoots Jon—this is Jonathan Sims?—an uncertain look before nodding slowly. “We’re happy to have you on the team.”
“O-Oh?” Martin squeaks, then grits his teeth and bodily forces his voice back into its normal range. “I’m—um, I’m happy to be here?”
“Good,” Tim says through a grin that looks more like a grimace, giving Martin’s shoulder a friendly pat. The look he shoots Jon is a dark, mistrustful thing. The look Jon gives him back is fragile, vulnerable, that winds the tension in Tim’s shoulders so tight it has to be painful.
Jon’s gaze flickers to Martin, just for a second—and then he disappears into his office, leaving the door cracked behind him.
Tim and Martin stand there for a second, staring at the door. Tim’s still tense as a bowstring, and his grip on Martin’s shoulder is almost uncomfortable. The air in the Archives feels stuffy and too warm, and there’s a strange prickling sensation on the back of Martin’s neck, like he’s being subjected to close scrutiny.
Then Tim sighs and lets go of Martin’s shoulder, a little of the tension bleeding out of him, and without it he looks small, deflated. He goes back to his desk and sits down, booting up his laptop without a word of explanation to Martin.
Martin stares at the back of Tim’s head for a moment, a number of questions clamoring around in his brain—what the fuck was that? What’s wrong with Jon? Why are you so obviously suspicious of him?—but the words won’t come. Breaking the silence feels...sacrilegious, somehow. Every breath of air sticks against the back of his throat.
In the end, he doesn’t say anything either, just sits at his desk and takes out his Institute-issued laptop. Stares blankly at the screen as the machine slowly, laboriously, comes to life.
-0-
Sasha’s not entirely sure how to interpret the tense atmosphere that has descended over the Archives.
The first day she’d arrived a couple of minutes before she was supposed to, prepared to follow Jon’s direction and help him adjust as best she could. (Her feelings about Jon’s promotion...didn’t matter. She didn’t like it, but it wasn’t his fault that Elias was an old-fashioned misogynist.)
But when she’d come down the stairs, Tim and the assistant she didn’t know, Martin, had been seated quietly at their desks. They’d both had the same distant, shell-shocked look on their faces, like they’d received some shattering, horrible news. Sasha had sent Tim a confused look, but he either hadn’t noticed it, or hadn’t wanted to explain.
She hadn’t even seen Jon that first day, just received a polite email asking her to start organizing the statements according to the system which he’d devised.
It’s been almost three days, and nothing has changed. Oh sure, they’ve all started organizing the statements as directed. Tim cracks jokes, Martin tiptoes around them and makes copious amounts of tea. That strange tension that makes the hair on the back of her neck stand up, like the world is holding its breath in anticipation, hasn’t faded though. And while she doesn’t know Martin all that well, she knows that something’s still up with Tim. He seems more subdued than usual, keeps sending uncomfortable looks in the direction of Jon’s office—
—which hasn’t been open since that first day. She hasn’t seen Jon at all either, no matter how early she arrives or how late she stays. The only proof she has that he’s still alive is the polite email she periodically receives, detailing some specific task that he wants for them to do.
Even then, his emails are...odd. She’s not sure how she can tell, but they feel...awkward? Stilted? Like he’s only half-aware of what he’s typing, or like he’s only asking them to do things because he feels like he should, not because he has any actual goal in mind.
Normally she’d be frustrated by this, would complain bitterly to Tim about Elias passing over her for someone who obviously doesn’t properly appreciate the position they’ve been given—except that she knows Jon. He’d made a point to explain the situation to her himself, an apologetic twist tucked into the corner of his mouth. More than that, he’d asked her to follow him to the archives, saying that he wanted the two people he trusted most, her and Tim, to come with him.
He respects her too much not to take this job seriously.
The strangeness of the archives is only emphasized by Jon’s complete and utter lack of presence within it, but she doesn’t—she doesn’t buy that. She doesn’t believe that he’d just suddenly decide not to do the job he’d been so anxious to excel at.
More damning than anything is Tim’s complete, utter silence regarding Jon’s strange behavior, but whatever he knows about it, he isn’t saying anything. Martin is willing to talk, but he seems to be as lost as she is.
“I—that first day, Jon…” Martin shrugs, shooting a nervous glance toward the door leading to the archives. He’s been spending a lot of time hovering in the break room making tea, not that she can blame him. “He—I mean obviously I don’t know him very well, but he seemed...upset?”
“Upset,” Sasha repeats dubiously.
Martin lets out an exhausted sigh and turns away, waving a dismissive hand. “Look, I’m not entirely sure how to explain it. He just—okay, so, bear with me for a second, but he reminded me of this guy who used to live in my neighborhood.”
Sasha backs off, folding her arms and leaning against the counter. “Okay?”
“There was this little old couple that used to live in my neighborhood. They were—they were really sweet! The husband used to give candy to us younger kids. But um—sometimes you’d see him sitting in the rocking chair on his porch, and it was like...he wasn’t entirely there? Like, he’d just sit there for hours, rocking and staring at nothing. That’s—that’s what Jon’s expression reminded me of.”
Martin gets more animated the more he talks, Sasha notes; his hands move in broad, sweeping gestures, his expression twisting into an expression of extreme concentration. The moment he finishes he deflates again, tucking his hands into his armpits self-consciously, a hedgehog curling protectively in on itself.
“So, yeah,” he finishes eloquently.
“Huh,” Sasha says thoughtfully.
She gets back to her desk. Looks over at Tim, who’s studiously working through a box of statements, his mouth set in a neutral, concentrated frown. Takes a deep breath, letting the taste of dust and old papers sit heavy on her tongue.
Then she opens her laptop and starts looking through the catalog of cursed items that are currently being held in Artifact Storage.
(She doesn’t think that she’ll find anything, but—but just in case.)
-0-
They all get the call the next Monday morning: Elias Bouchard was found dead in his office.
#tma#iceeckos12 writes#my writing#just a little time travel au#probably wont continue this but i thought it was kinda fun
243 notes
·
View notes
Text
| ʜᴏᴍᴇ | ᴊᴊᴋ | ᴀᴏᴛ | ʜǫ | ꜰɪʟᴏ | ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛs | ᴍɪᴍɪ |
GUNI-GUNI // ARMIN ARLERT
translation of the title: hallucination/imagination
song inspiration: hanggang kailan by orange & lemons
event; piliin mo ang pilipinas by @lumpiang-toge
amihan’s note: thank you for beta reading bebs @/lumpiang-toge, love you so much 😚 honestly? not that confident with this entry fsjbfksd. third entry for the event, finally starting to clear my drafts. anyways, another angst :D happy reading!
summary: armin arlert and you are a married couple who lives a simple peaceful life until he got promoted.
husband!armin x spouse!reader
you lean to his touch, face resting against his warm palms. you smiled up at him as he did the same, “i love you” you said to him. armin cherishes moments like this, you always look the happiest when you’re with him. it’s not even his ego speaking, you genuinely just love him as a whole.
he loves that about you, he has never felt this way towards anyone, he’s always been afraid; afraid that maybe he will be showing too much affection, afraid of being called needy and worse of all afraid of eventually pushing people away because of those. he’s come to the point where he is comfortably living behind the shadows of his friends, however, you’re different.
you’ve come to notice him more than the others, he’s got used to being the last option for everyone. but you came and changed that. you’ve always put him first more than anyone, anything. his cheeks heat up at his thoughts, you have always been different from others.
the odd one out if you put in other words, but it’s not just you.. it’s both of you as a couple and he likes that. a soft smile starts appearing on his lips, hand still holding your face. “armin? sweetie? helloooo?” you wave a hand in front of his eyes.
he looked back at you, his brows rising up followed by a hum. “ah, sorry” he softly replied, you pouted, crossing your arms, his hand falling down from your face. “you’ve been awfully distracted for the past few days” his smile ever so slightly falters remembering why he went and had this day with you, “something wrong, baby?” you asked, concerned for his well being.
“were they overworking you again? i can always ask erwin-” he instantly shook his head, you’ve always become protective whenever it comes to his work. “no, it’s not that”
he took your hand in his, his thumb caressing the back of it, his eyes staring back at yours. you hummed, heart slightly picking up its pace. you suddenly have a bad feeling about this, uneasiness surfacing inside you.
“darling, i got promoted” your eyes widen in shock, not believing your own guts. you’re supposed to be overjoyed hearing this, your husband got promoted for god’s sake but anxiety is all you can feel. you forced a smile on your face, not wanting to ruin the mood.
“that’s great!” you shake both your hands in joy, you’re happy with his news but why are your emotions not cooperating? your guts still uneasy, “it’s overseas” his voice dejected, shoulders slouched. “but you still got a promotion! I’m happy for you baby!” he looks up to you, eyes glassy from the tears welling up, “really?” you nod smile still present on your face, “really”
“to armin!” jean’s slurred words echoed in the bar holding his cup of beer up in the air, the group rented the whole place for armin’s farewell party. which armin deeply disagreed with them doing, but once the group agreed on one thing there’s really no stopping.
the rest of the group repeated his words, cheering for armin who’s sitting beside you. your smile got wider, squeezing his hand, you leaned in and whispered “everything’s gonna be alright” your words reassuring him, his body relaxing almost instantly. he gave your hand a squeeze looking at you and mumbling a quick “thank you”
'umuwi ka na, baby
di na ako sanay nang wala ka'
translation: 'come home, baby
i’m not used without you by my side'
you stirred in your sleep, turning around and stretching your arm towards the other side expecting a warm body to snuggle with. you pat around the bed, brows furrowed in confusion.
you opened your eyes, sitting up straight looking at the empty space next to you. you groan reaching for your phone at the bedside table quickly tapping on his contact. “hello?” his voice laced with concern, you lay back relaxing from his soft voice on the other end.
'mahirap ang mag-isa
at sa gabi'y hinahanap-hanap kita’
translation: 'it’s hard to be alone
and every night, i miss you'
“what are you doing up? it’s the middle of the night there!” he lightly scolded you, your eyes closing picturing his cute angry face. “i miss you” his rant stopping after hearing you, he blushes and hides his face behind his hand speed walking to a room for privacy.
“don’t say those words so nonchalantly!” he whisper-shouted, causing your lips to turn upward, “you’re blushing?” he clicks his tongue, eyes darting every corner of the room he’s in. “armin we’re already married!” you teased hugging his pillow.
“so?” he weakly bite back, “that’s unfair, why are you always so cute?” you whined playing with the ring on your finger as it reflected from the moonlight. conversation flowed smoothly between the two of you, his voice unknowingly calming and lulling you back to sleep. your eyes drooping close, his story slowly fading away.
after some time of not hearing any response from you, armin chuckles imagining you adorably sleeping with your phone falling down on the bed. “see you in your dreams, my darling” he whispers on his phone before ending the call.
‘hanggang kailan ako maghihintay na makasama kang muli
sa buhay kong puno ng paghihirap?’
translation: 'how long will i wait to be with you again
in my life full of suffering?'
you held armin’s hands wrapping them around you, leaning in his touch as you took in his warmth humming in delight. he’s finally here, alive and in flesh. no more cold nights, the bed won’t feel big anymore.
“i missed you so much” you mumble on his skin, “i know” he said while stroking your head. “but you need to let go” he whispers, you shut your eyes tightly shaking your head.
‘at tanging ikaw lang ang pumapawi sa mga luha
at naglalagay ng ngiti sa mga labi
umuwi ka na, baby’
translation: 'and you are the only one who wipes away my tears
and puts a smile on my lips
come home, baby'
“no” you firmly said, hugging him tighter. “y/n, darling” his voice slowly fading “you have to” your breath hitched, his once warm body now feels cold. “armin no” your voice cracking desperately clinging to him.
“you need to accept it” he smiled sadly at you, “no no no, that’s not true” eyes still closed not wanting to face the reality.
“utopia district police chief, chief superintendent armin arlert died on duty…” the television’s static sound filled the room.
you felt your knees buckle, falling down on the cold floor of your shared apartment. your tears that you didn’t know you were holding back are now falling down your face freely.
'umuwi ka na baby'
translation: 'come home baby'
copyright © 2021 by love-amihan all rights reserved. do not repost in other platforms. reblogs are welcome and highly appreciated! <33
#🇵🇭 — piliin mo ako#aot scenario#aot oneshots#attack on titan au#shingeki no kyoujin au#snk au#aot au#snk scenario#snk oneshot#armin arlert#armin arlert x reader#armin arlet x y/n#armin x reader#armin oneshot#armin arlert oneshot#snk angst#aot angst#armin angst#fandom;aot#paradis;armin
91 notes
·
View notes
Note
Phoebes did you notice that most of the song prompts are odd numbers? I just think it's kind of neat! But for some lovely chaos in the stats, let us please have song no. 10? Also your doing this is a wonderful gift to the world and I adore you so so so so much
@rockingrobin69, Robin, my darling, hello. First of all, I'd noticed that the first ten or so were mostly odd numbers, but after you pointed it out, I realized how many odd-numbered ones I'd done! How funny. Also, before I get to tell you what song you've selected, I want to say that you and your writing are the true gifts and the feeling is very much mutual, my love. I cannot thank you enough for your constant love, support, and friendship. I absolutely adore you. <3
Another funny thing, Robin, is that you've managed to now select two out of my top three all-time favorite songs by Taylor Swift. (song prompt 3 was, ironically, my 3rd favorite TS song: "it's time to go.") But here, you've requested song 10, which is my number 1 favorite Taylor song of all time: "All Too Well."
The trouble is, I've already written one fic to this before. But no matter! I will persevere. This is technically a sequel to the original fic, but you don't have to have read it to understand this one! It is highly likely when the 10-minute version of All Too Well comes out that I will write a fic to that, but since it's not out yet, here's this. CW: post-breakup, potion/substance addiction, bad coping mechanisms, potions overdose; but there's a hopeful/happy ending!
Paralytici Memorias means "paralyzed memories" in Latin, if Google Translate is to be believed. And finally, an enormous, gigantic thank you to my big sis @avenueofesc for making this coherent and much better.
It wasn't a substitute by any means. It would never replace what it was made to mimic. In some ways, it was hopelessly inadequate.
But it was all he had: just the potion and his memories. If Draco's mind insisted on torturing him by reliving the best moments of his life in sepia-toned images, at least this way he could delay the crushing reality a little while longer.
Paralytici Memorias was his greatest triumph and biggest mistake. At first, he blamed it on completing his due diligence; every good potioneer should know and test the effects of their potion.
But then one test turned into two. Before he knew it, Draco spent the better part of his days coming in and out of deep periods of sleep, reaching for the vial every time his eyes opened to the sight of his empty flat, his engagement band on the coffee table next to him.
He wondered what Astoria would say if she could see him now. If their current level of communication as soon-to-be-weds was any indication, their marriage contract was more of a business venture than a romantic one.
After all, as long as he had a pulse, sperm for insemination, and a sound enough mind to sign over half his vaults, he'd have done his duty as her future husband as far as she was concerned.
"You'll forget about me, I promise."
His own words—written on the parchment he'd sent off with his owl before he could stop himself—were burned into his memory. He still remembered the searing pain in his chest as he promised the love of his life that what they'd had could be forgotten. In breaking Harry's heart, and in shattering his own, his only consolation was knowing that Harry would be happy eventually; that Harry would move on and find someone with the freedom to love him the way he deserved, someone who could offer the intangible riches in which Draco had always been impoverished.
As he reached for the vial that afternoon, it was to remind himself of the priceless love he sold for the price of his heart.
The potion’s effect was hazier than a Pensieve, but this way he could see the memories from his own point of view; could relive it in his own skin. Still, his mind couldn't do justice to Harry's eyes, the bright sound of his laughter, the warmth of his skin.
They were in Harry's car, the name of which Draco had never bothered to learn, too terrified and fascinated by the contraption. He yelped when Harry took a hand off the wheel to grab Draco's shaking one in a reassuring squeeze.
"Hands on the wheel, Potter!"
"I've got it under control, love. You watched me put the protection spells on the car myself, and it would be perfectly safe even without them. I promise I won't let anything happen to you," Harry said without an ounce of condescension.
Draco exhaled shakily, "If you say so."
"I do. Now, why don't you tell me a little more about where we're going?"
"Have you forgotten already? Honestly, Potter, your memory is abysmal."
"I haven't forgotten. I just like hearing you talk."
Draco valiantly didn't blush. And while he described the beauty of the Cotswolds, he found himself mesmerized at the red and orange leaved trees that lined the road as they drove out of the city and into the peaceful countryside, with its steady beeping noise.
Wait…that wasn't right. Why was it beeping?
"Potter, there's something wrong with the car."
"Draco?"
He squeezed his eyes shut tight before he opened them, blinking as the unfamiliar room came into focus. He could feel his pulse pounding in his head as his mind raced in a heady mix of confusion and anxiety. What happened? Why wasn't he in his flat?
"You're in St. Mungos."
Draco's head nearly snapped as he turned to look at a pale-faced Harry sitting in the chair next to his bed. Near Harry stood an unfamiliar woman scribbling on a clipboard. She reached over onto a side table and handed Draco a paper cup. The water was cool, a relief for his parched, sandpaper throat.
"Mr. Malfoy, how do you feel?" She asked after he handed the cup back to her.
Draco closed his eyes to stop the room from spinning. "My head is killing me and I'm dizzy, but I'm okay. What happened?"
"Your fiancée found you unconscious in your flat. We completed a blood test and couldn't match the substance to anything we know—"
"I invented it," Draco grumbled. "Where is Astoria? Harry, what are you doing here?"
The healer pressed her lips together. "I'll leave you to gather yourself for a few minutes, but I'll be back soon to ask you more about that potion, and next steps from there, alright?"
Draco nodded. "Thank you, Healer...?"
She smiled. "I'm Healer Rostova. Press that pager if you need something, but otherwise, I'll be back in a little while." With that, she left the room, the door clicking softly behind her.
Draco turned to Harry, who regarded him with wide, worried eyes. "What happened? Why are you here?"
Harry bit his lip. "Astoria found you unconscious on your couch. She brought you here and then she, well...She called me."
"She—what?"
"She called me. She said you were in the hospital, and I didn't really think much beyond Apparating here."
"Why did she call you?"
"She said you were...talking in your sleep."
Draco blushed. "Oh."
"Yeah," Harry let out a humorless, breathy chuckle. "She figured it out, I think. She said to tell you that she's having her parents terminate the contract."
Draco closed his eyes, letting his head thud against the headboard and then instantly regretting it, gritting his teeth against the sharp pain. "Great. I bet Mother's furious."
"She'll come around."
"You don't know that. You don't know her."
"No, I don't, but hopefully she'll want you to do what makes you happy."
Draco clenched his jaw and looked away. "Happiness is easier to manage when it's artificial. I ran away from the only thing that ever brought me close to real happiness. I can't handle it."
"Then let's manage it together."
Draco closed his eyes, kept his head turned.
"Draco, look at me."
Slowly, Draco forced himself to look at Harry, opening his eyes to let the other man see the tears beginning to well.
Harry's expression was as pained, yet kind. "Do you have any idea how agonizing it has been to miss you?"
Draco's chest seized, sharp with regret. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I thought it was what's best for both of us, I—"
"Shhh," Harry leaned forward, rubbing a soothing hand over Draco's. "We'll make it okay. We'll figure this out together, alright?"
Draco kept his eyes open, let himself enjoy happiness in full color. "Okay. Together."
Send me an ask about Harry Potter, broadway/musicals, The West Wing, and/or Taylor Swift! Or just about life in general :).
Also, I have a playlist of my 99 most listened-to songs of the year so far. Pick a number 1--99 and send me an ask and I'll write you a fic based on it!
#drarry#draco malfoy#harry potter#drarry fic#drarry fanfic#drarry fanfiction#draco and harry#harry and draco#draco x harry#harry x draco#cw: addiction#cw: post breakup#angst with a happy ending#hpdm#drarry squad
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
Under the Moonlight- Part 1 - Her
Once again, it was pouring with rain. You had been at the academy for a week, and every day had been much the same. Of course, you were happy to be here, it felt wonderful to be around other witches, to feel a true kinship to people, but something was wrong. Something inside of you was just wrong, and you didn't know how to fix it. It happened sometimes; you'd wake up and feel the familiar ache. The rain didn't help. You longed for a clear sky and sun. The memory of the sun beating down on your skin like a thousand sharp kisses made your soul ache with longing.
You'd made some friends in the academy, but mostly you kept to yourself. It's not that you didn't like them; you did. It's just something about connecting to people was difficult. The distance you had created was reassuring, and you felt slightly happy that you had protected yourself this way.
Bounding out of bed, you stretch for a moment and look at the clock. 5am. Why can't I sleep like an average person, you thought in frustration. Abandoning the idea of sleep, you throw on a thick cardigan and quietly head downstairs. Maybe there's a recipe for a sleeping draft you could find. You ponder the thought in excitement. The academy is entirely silent, the girls asleep in their rooms. Something about the academy in the moments you see it in silence makes you marvel at its safety.
A rustle in the kitchen makes you pause, someones here. You are filled with anxiety as your mind rushes through potential problems. Someone's broken in. It's a witch-hunter, the men Zoe told you about or something else wrong, but before you can get too worked up, you hear a familiar sigh. A voice you think you would know anywhere. Cordelia's. The headmistress and supreme of the coven. You'd only really caught glimpses of the woman in your week here. Zoe and Queenie had explained that some minor threat had kept Cordelia away from the girls.
The first time you saw her was in a transfiguration lesson. Zoe was showing the class how to change tulips into chocolates when a gorgeous blonde woman had whisked in, capturing your attention instantly. She pulled Zoe aside and spoke to her in a soft voice. You could only hear because you were sat quite close. You weren't really interested in the conversation, more the sound of the angelic woman's voice. It reminded you of beautiful music. The blonde stopped talking to Zoe and suddenly met your eyes. You turned away as quickly as you could and attempted to put all your focus on the tulip in your hand. When you were brave enough to sneak a look again, she was gone.
Every encounter since then had been much the same. Cordelia would whisk in for a moment and be gone in the next. Sometimes you noticed the other witches trying to get her attention and how she would smile lovingly but only engage in the shortest conversations with them. I'd learnt that this was unusual behaviour for her as the other witches complained about her sudden absence frequently. You felt mildly sad that you'd come to the academy at the only time this gorgeous woman seemed to be away from it.
Your mind snapped back as you heard her sigh come from the kitchen again. You debated going in and seeing her alone for the first time, but fear got the better of you, and you snuck past the kitchen and tiptoed into the greenhouse. It was a paradise under the soft moonlight, and instantly, you sighed in relief. The idea of a sleeping draft suddenly flooded back into your head, and you began searching through draws and under plants for anything you could use. Some of the draws were locked, and you realised you were making quite a bit of noise. The lack of sleep was making you clumsy. You sighed loudly in frustration.
You had an idea. You weren't untalented with plants; you knew they had energy, each different and unique. Maybe you didn't need a recipe and could make one on your own. An ambitious task, but you were bored of looking and besides, what else were you going to do.
Closing your eyes, you began to search for your feelings. The darkness behind your eyelids started to show colours. The plants began to hum in a way you could understand ever so slightly. You held your hands in front of your body and walked forward, quickly feeling lavender. Keeping your eyes closed, you picked a few stems of it. You became engrossed in this little ritual, moving amongst the plants, picking a leaf here and there. Only when you felt a considerable warmth behind you did you pause. Something light and powerful was pulling you back around, and keeping your eyes closed and your hands forward, you moved towards it. This was the final ingredient, you were sure. You reached up and felt something soft and hair-like in your fingers. You pulled at it to break it off.
"Ouch."
You jumped back, and your eyes flung open. Standing before you was Cordelia Goode. Dressed in a beautiful pink robe, she was rubbing her head and trying not to laugh.
"Cordelia! I mean Ms Goode. No wait supreme? Um.."
You were so shocked and embarrassed that your face burnt and you had no idea what to do.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't see you."
She looked at you curiously.
"One doesn't tend to see people with ones eyes closed."
You put the leaves you were holding on the desk behind you and used its weight to steady yourself.
"I didn't think anyone would be here. I was..."
Cordelia looks at you and then at the ingredients on the table.
"You were trying to make a sleeping potion?"
Through your embarrassment, you couldn't help but feel slightly proud that your intuition was correct. You let out a small laugh.
"Yeah. I looked for a recipe but I couldn't find one."
You gesture to the leaves and plants you collected. "I was just collecting what I felt drawn too."
You blushed once again at the thought of pulling her hair. She must think you're the craziest person ever.
"Well I'm impressed, you collected nearly everything."
Cordelia moves next to you to examine your ingredients.
"You're y/n right?"
You nod with a small smile.
"I'm Cordelia. I'm sorry I haven't been here to welcome you this week, there were some complications."
Her voice becomes dark, and it makes you shiver.
"Yes Zoe told me. Is everything okay?"
Her eyes soften as she looks at you.
"Yes dear, it's all sorted now. Nothing you need to worry about."
Cordelia sits down, and you watch the elegance in her movements, unable to take your eyes off her.
"Anyway, trouble sleeping?" She says with a small laugh that you echo.
"Yep. For the last 20 years in fact. I never could get that skill down."
Cordelia laughs, and you can't help but smile at the fact that you caused that laughter.
"Would you like some help making the potion? Well it's more of a face mask if we make the one I usually make."
You blush and shake your head.
"No no you really don't have too. I'm sure you're really busy."
Cordelia shakes her head and smiles the most beautiful smile, her lips captivating you.
"Nope. There's no threat to the coven so I'm free as a bird."
You laugh slightly at the expression you hadn't heard in so long.
"Aren't you tired?"
You ask, looking at the little dark circles under her eyes.
"I'm not a great sleeper either."
You search her face to see if she just feels sorry for you, but you see only honesty in her eyes.
"Then yes, I'd love the help. I have no idea what I'm doing."
You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding.
The next hour is lovely. You come to life in the presence of the supreme, laughing like you haven't in months. She asks about your interests and what you did before coming to the academy, and you ask her about herself. You talk about your greenhouse at home. She's very open, but you notice very brief when answering a personal question. You understand, though, she doesn't know you, and you're just her student. For a moment, you feel sad, but your face lights up again when she begins talking about how she discovered the sleep mask recipe. The awkwardness you initially felt evaporates, and suddenly you understand why the other witches missed her so much this week. She's like the sun. Completely warm and captivating.
"I think it's done."
Cordelia says, pulling her paste covered hands away. You look down at the brown covered paste she's made.
"Ew."
The consistency of the paste looks disgusting, and you frown at it. Cordelia playfully elbows your arm.
"Hey this stuff is a lifesaver, trust me darling you won't be saying that later."
Your heart stops at the pet name, and you think that if you weren't sat down, your legs would give way. Instead, you focus really hard on the horrible looking paste.
"We'll see. I've tried a lot of sleeping recipes and nothing has worked before."
Cordelia hums in acknowledgement.
"Ah but you've never tried anything made by me."
Once again, her voice makes you melt, and you try not to look into her eyes which only results in looking at her silk pyjamas which make your heart race. You look into her eyes now and see that she's looking at you softly.
"It's only 6 am. I think you could get a few hours of sleep in."
Cordelia takes the paste and puts it in a jar before moving to the sink to clean her hands. She moves back to the seat and opens the jar, taking a small amount and putting it on her thumb. She looks at you with her big chocolate eyes, and you melt under her gaze. You barely notice her lift her hand, but you shiver when her thumb traces a line on your forehead.
You hum slightly as a warmth encases your body and then blush before looking back at the stunning woman.
"It works quickly. Come on let's get you to bed."
You're about to protest and insist you can get there yourself, but your legs give way as soon as you stand up. Cordelia grabs your arms and holds you comfortingly against her body.
"I told you it would work."
You hum into her shoulder, your head struggling to stay up.
"Come on sleepy head."
Cordelia chuckles and puts an arm around your body, and begins leading you upstairs.
"Which ones your room? Y/N?"
You try to get words out, but for some reason, your mouth refuses to move. Everything is soft and dreamlike. You think you hear someone saying your name, but you're not sure. Your eyes flutter open, and you see yellow and pink before they shut again. You hum contently into the warm feeling inside your body and let your brain finally sleep.
Birds. You can hear bird calls. The noise is comforting, and you cuddle into it. You feel like you're in a warm cloud. You sink into the calm feeling and listen to the birds for a while whilst feeling comes back into your body. It starts as a tingle in your toes; you wiggle them contently. Feeling suddenly comes into your arms, and you feel yourself holding something warm. You hug it tighter in a state of bliss you've never felt before. This is the warmest perfect moment, the very moment you've been longing for. More feeling comes back, and you freeze up.
"Someone's awake I see."
Shit. Feeling starts coming back everywhere, and you realise it's not a blanket you're holding, but legs. You freeze completely as memories come flooding back to you: Cordelia, the greenhouse, the sleeping draft.
"Cordelia?"
You say softly and guiltily as if you're saying sorry. You peek open your eyes and see Cordelia's soft skin under your head. Her nightdress had ridden up, meaning you were holding her soft legs and laying in her lap. You felt fear and embarrassment seep into your cheeks until you felt her hand on your head stroking your hair.
"I'm sorry y/n. I didn't realise how strong the sleep mask was and I didn't know where your room was..."
Wait, you thought, she's embarrassed? You were literally clinging to her legs, and still, she thought she was at fault? The craziness of the situation gave you strength as you slowly moved your arms to free her legs.
"I'm the one who should be sorry. I've been holding you like a koala all night."
That earned you a soft chuckle, and you moved to sit up but ended up only lifting your head to look around. Taking in your surroundings, you saw that this was definitely not your room. It was sparsely but carefully decorated, light and open, and the bedsheets were the softest and comfortable you'd ever felt in your life.
"I like your room."
You mumble and rest your head back down. This time you move your head to lay next to Cordelia instead of on her.
"Thank you."
The husky but gentle way she says it makes you open an eye to look up at her. She's sat up watching you with wide eyes, and for a moment, you think you see the longing in them.
"Damn that sleep mud was amazing. I've never sleep that well in my life."
You don't know what possesses you to do it, but you wiggle your head slightly closer to her, so it's resting against her legs. You feel her hand return to your head again.
"I told you."
She says, and you can't be sure, but you think she's smiling. Keeping your eyes closed, you reach out a hand to feel the energy of the sun. By the angle of your hand, you deduce that it's almost nine o'clock.
"I have a class soon don't I."
You mumble in annoyance. You've just had the most perfect sleep of your life, and now you have to have classes. You sigh against Cordelia's leg.
"What did you just do?"
Cordelia whispers.
"Sighed?"
"No, how did you know the time?"
You freeze up as you realise what you have been trying to ignore—your gift. If any of the other girls had paid any real attention to you, they would have seen it, you weren't exactly hiding it, but you knew that nobody knew.
"I felt it. I felt the suns energy."
"Felt it how?"
Cordelia says in engaged wonder.
"It's how I found the ingredients for the sleep draft. The energy that every living thing has I can feel. It's better when I close my eyes, then I can see it."
You move your head to look up at Cordelia again. She's looking down at you.
"Amazing."
You feel your cheeks blush and move to sit up.
"I'm sorry if I caused you any inconvenience last night. I didn't mean to ..."
You trail off thinking of all the things you could apologise for, but she just smiles.
"Don't be."
Her voice is so silky and warm that it takes your breath away.
"I should go get ready for classes. Thanks again for the sleep draft."
She smiles warmly at you as you climb out of her bed and head for the door. You take one quick look back at her, and she looks like an angel. You pry your eyes away before you do anything else embarrassing.
A/n
If anyone’s reading this I really hope you are enjoying it! I have written quite a lot of this book and will post as often as possible. I’ll post it on Wattpad as well.
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
I Do (Again)
The last of the eight Bridgerton weddings.
Written in honor of the beautiful and lovely @jake-amy 💛
Themes: fluff, family, light angst, blatant sentimentalism, Bridgertons being Bridgertons
Length: 4.5k
ao3 link | masterlist | read under the cut if you want!
“Well, then you’ll never wake him up.”
“Why don’t we dump some water on him and get it over and done with?”
“Why don’t we dump some water on him and get it over and done with?”
“Hm, I think there’s a mug right-”
“Oh, bloody- Gregory, wake up!”
“Agh!”
The previously sound-asleep gentleman bolted into an upright position as a hand roughly shook his shoulder. With a low moan, he squinted into the darkness, allowing his eyes to adjust to the light. When they did, and he could clearly see the three silhouettes in front of him, he groaned.
“Good morning, sunshine,” Colin quipped, a huge, aggravating grin plastered to his face.
“Congratulations on the big day,” said Benedict.
Anthony nodded his agreement, lips perked up into a smirk. “Have a good sleep?”
Gregory looked towards the window, seeing dim orange light spilling into the room. “What time is it?” he asked, his voice still gruff with sleep.
“Mmm,” Anthony glanced at his pocket watch. “Quarter to six.”
The youngest brother stared at him, then back at the window, then back to the three wide-awake idiots standing before him. He then blinked several times before letting out a long sigh. “And why, pray tell, have you woken me up before sunrise?”
Colin stepped closer to him, grin widening as the other two looked to him to answer. All of them were practically bouncing with excitement. “Why, it is your wedding day, is it not?”
Gregory let out another tired breath, slumping down against his headboard. “It is.”
“Which means that it is Lucy’s wedding day as well, is it not?”
There was a beat of hesitation before Gregory flatly repeated, “It is.”
Colin nodded thoughtfully. “So, I thought that we’d continue our tradition, and, of course, wanted to give Anthony and Benedict the chance to join us in such brotherly bonding.”
Benedict leaned over to give him a heavy pat on the back, a lopsided smile so irritatingly placed on his lips that Gregory had the urge to knock it off. Meanwhile, Anthony’s smirk only grew as he gave him a solemn nod.
“Our tradition?” There was a small crack in his voice as he said it, dread washing over him as he looked between their disturbingly cheery faces.
This time, all three of them grinned and looked at each other for a moment before nodding simultaneously. And just a few seconds later, Gregory’s arms and legs were met by six hands, all hoisting him up and out of his bed with frightening swiftness.
There was a cry and some rather foul language grumbled, as well as some hearty laughter, but soon enough, Gregory had been pushed into the washroom, put into his wedding attire, and then placed into a carriage on its way to Fennsworth House.
“We aren’t really doing this, right?” he asked, still a meager smidgen of hope left within the youngest man.
“Oh,” Benedict laughed, one leg eagerly bouncing on his other knee. “We’re doing this.”
“We could have walked instead of taking the carriage, of course, but I’m afraid poor Anthony’s a bit old for all of that,” Colin teased, giving his older brother a nudge.
Anthony gave him a deadpanned look in return but simply shook his head. “I’m too old for your nonsense, that much is true, at least.”
“I really can’t believe this,” Gregory muttered, crossing his arms. “You’ve all really done this. And on my wedding da...” But he trailed off as his mouth curved into a small smile.
It was his wedding day.
Wedding. Day.
Him. Gregory.
And Lucy. His Lucy.
Lucy Lucy Lucy.
They were getting married.
In just about six hours, they would be married. And she would really and truly be his Lucy.
Gregory was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn’t notice his three brothers exchanging amused looks and prideful grins. All he could think about was Lucy, and how beautiful she was going to look, and how happy they were going to be.
When they arrived minutes later, the four Bridgerton brothers climbed up, by order of youngest to eldest, in the very same tree Gregory and Colin had sat in just a few weeks ago.
Once they were settled and decently comfortable, Gregory glanced at them reluctantly. “... We aren’t really going to sit here until Lucy leaves, right? Isn’t it bad luck for me to see the bride anyhow?”
“Oh, don’t worry, we’ve planned for that,” Benedict smiled, patting him on the knee in a mock-reassuring manner. “We’ll push you off and you’ll hide behind the tree until she’s out of sight.”
Gregory looked at him blankly, waiting for a laugh, but it was clear that none of his brothers were joking. In fact, Colin even brought out the bag Gregory hadn’t noticed him bringing and removed an impressive assortment of sandwiches, fruits, and cheese from it. When he noticed his younger brother gaping at him, he, taking a bite of the first sandwich before handing off the bag to Anthony, shrugged. “I certainly wasn’t going to come unprepared this time.”
“I think it’s rather nice,” Benedict said, biting into an apple. “Your last morning as a single man, spent with your three older brothers.”
And although Gregory murmured something like, “We could have gone to the club instead,” there was something surprisingly sentimental about it all, and it seemed to hang in the air for a few moments. There were no sounds other than those of the birds chirping, carriages riding down the road, and four men chewing on their makeship breakfast.
Finally, Anthony cleared his throat. “Now, Gregory. Is there anything you’d wish to know about marriage?”
There was a pause, during which everyone’s minds went to the most wicked of places. Gregory looked at him with a small smile, his neck tinging red, while Colin and Benedict both snorted.
“Oh, for God’s sake,” Anthony groaned, rolling his eyes, but no one missed the quirk of his lips.
They spent the remaining hours watching the sunrise and talking, sharing stories and jokes and “marital advice” (some of which Gregory stored away and some of which he knew was utterly useless). It was a bit surreal, in all truth. His three older brothers had always been lumped together, the notorious A, B, and C, whereas he’d always been at the end of the row, happy with his lot but separated all the same.
But that morning, he just felt like ‘one of the Bridgerton men’. It was as if he’d finally crossed from boy into man and was truly a part of them now.
Anthony, Benedict, and Colin, in the meantime, also took notice of how much their little brother had grown, shaping up to be another one of them. They’d all watched him transform from infant into man, but it was only that morning that they’d really noticed it.
The last of the Bridgerton siblings was getting married. A new part of life was truly beginning.
The food had disappeared long before the doors to Fennsworth House opened and servants began bustling out, but the excitement hadn’t stopped. And true to their word, the three older brothers pushed the youngest out of the tree once he’d made it onto the lowest branch, forcing him to stand behind the tree, facing away from the house and his bride.
It was then, while Gregory was standing with his back against the tree and listening for a specific voice, that fear materialized. He’d been distracted thoroughly enough by his brothers throughout the morning for his anxieties to hide away, but then, it was like he was almost alone. And suddenly, he pictured it. Servants exiting the doors, followed by Robert and Hermione, and then-
And then no Lucy.
Robert and Hermione showing up at the church alone, wearing somber expressions and pitying glances.
“She’s not coming,” Hermione would say, her voice soft and condoling.
She wouldn’t marry him. She’d reconsidered and realized that it wasn’t right- that she was making a mistake.
Gregory roughly shook his head, forcing his eyes shut. He was being stupid, he knew that. Lucy had done nothing to make him feel as though she didn’t love him as much as he loved her. She wanted to marry him just as much as he wanted to marry her, there was nothing he was more certain about in his entire being.
But he’d been there, just a few weeks ago, sitting and waiting for her to come out. And then she had, wearing a wedding dress and a smile on her face, absolutely no intention of calling off the wedding.
“Stupid,” he muttered to himself, just quietly enough so that none of his brothers heard.
He heard voices, ones that did nothing to reassure the groom’s failing nerves. He didn’t dare turn around nor look at his brothers, hearing little more than the sound of his beating heart.
But then there was something else.
Among the voices came a giggle, one that was giddy and lovely and made his heart sore like nothing else in the world ever could.
“Please, I don’t want to be late!” he heard Lucy say- his Lucy, her voice filled with joy and just the slightest hint of exasperation.
“She looks lovely, Greg,” Benedict said, the smile clear and bright in his voice.
“Yeah?” Gregory asked, his voice sounding so relieved that all of his brothers caught it.
Anthony, who was closest to him, placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “She really does.”
“Happy as well,” Colin added, grinning down at him.
And with that, Gregory let out a great breath, relaxing back into the tree. “It’s a fine day for a wedding, I think.”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was more modest than her first.
With the rush of the wedding, the decorations proved to be fair but sparse, the gown was pretty but not magnificent, and the chapel was nice but not breathtaking.
But it was better.
So, so much better.
Because the smile on Lucy’s face was so genuine and contented that it made her radiant.
They were in a small back room of the church, Lucy sitting serenely in a chair while Hermione flitted about and doted on her, doing little fixes to the bride’s hair and fluffing out her skirts whenever she saw fit. Every now and again, she’d look up at Lucy and give her a smile so beaming that it was almost overwhelming. “I don’t think there’s ever been a more beautiful bride,” her friend said, reaching up to squeeze her hand.
“Not since your wedding I think,” Lucy said before her lips pinched and her voice weakened, “Or mine, I suppose.”
Hermione tutted softly, standing up to fidget with Lucy’s veil. “Stop that, Luce,” she cooed, “none of that was your fault.”
Lucy glanced at her in the reflection before sighing. “Sorry,” she muttered.
Her maid of honor gave her a thoughtful look, but a knock came and the door opened before either could say anymore.
“I just wanted to take a peek at our blushing bride,” Kate said, affection bursting from her as she smiled at Lucy. “You look gorgeous,” she gushed. “The blue really brings out your eyes, you know?”
She gave her a tiny smile and a wobbly nod, knowing that it was too early in the day for any tears. “Thank you, Kate. Is everyone ready?”
And though she hadn’t meant for it, there was a hint of hesitation in her question, one that Lucy desperately wished didn’t exist. Despite knowing that it was ridiculous, a small part of her was terrified that it really was all too good to be true. That it wasn’t possible for her to really be this happy- that it wasn’t possible for her to get the life she’d only recently realized she wanted.
She hadn’t noticed that she’d tensed up until Kate’s hand met her shoulder, giving her a silent, reassuring squeeze.
Her smile was warm and happy as she answered, “They’re all in there eagerly awaiting you.”
Lucy let out a breath and nodded, relief flooding over her. Her lips curved upwards, and then, with a bit of irony, she asked, “Even Hyacinth?”
Kate laughed, giving her hand a light pat. “She’s not smiting the entire thing, which I think is good progress.”
The bride let out a small laugh and shrugged. She couldn’t really blame her future sister-in-law for the hostility, knowing that it’d be matched had the roles been reversed. Still, Lucy did hope that they’d be friends one day, at least ones close enough for holidays to be pleasant.
“Now, are you ready?” Kate asked, and Lucy blinked at her several times before her face took on a peaceful smile.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been more ready for anything in my life,” she said, absolutely sure in her answer.
She loved Gregory in the way that she had spent most of her life believing didn’t exist. She loved him in all the romantic ways poets wrote about, enchanting ways musicians played about, and impossible ways dreamers talked about.
It was unbelievable how lovely life could be with love.
So, yes, she was ready to marry him as long as he was ready to have her.
Kate squeezed her hand. “I’m so glad for you both, Lucy, I truly am. And I’m so glad to be able to call you family, as well.”
This time, Lucy had to blink to rid away the tears stinging the back of her eyes. “Thank you, Kate,” was all she could manage, her voice cracking on the word.
Kate smiled once again and nodded before ducking out of the room to take her seat in the chapel. And then it was time for Lucy and Hermione to make their way, meeting Richard as he waited for them.
He pecked his wife before turning to his sister with a merry smile. “A true vision in blue, Luce.”
She nodded at him as Hermione handed her a bouquet- delphiniums, ones that had been partially ruffled in the transport. It was absolutely different from the bouquet for her first wedding, which had featured perfect white and pink roses and peonies.
Lucy wouldn’t have traded her bouquet of delphiniums for all the money in the world.
She ran a petal between her fingers before she looked up, catching Hermione staring at her with her great big green eyes. “What is it?”
Her friend shook her head, wearing a smile so bright and soft that Lucy almost wondered if it was her wedding day instead. “You just- you look happy.” Hermione then sniffed rather uncharacteristically, “No one deserves this more than you, Lucy.”
And then she blew her a kiss and disappeared into the church, leaving brother and sister alone in the hall. Richard let out a quick breath before offering her his arm, his smile a bit sadder than that of his wife’s.
“Is something wrong?” she asked, worry sounding in her voice.
Her older brother looked down at her, lips pinching together. “I’m so sorry, Lucy.”
Her brows creased in concern and the hold on his arm tightened. “For what?”
He paused for a moment, his eyes moving across her face slowly. “For not stopping you last time. For knowing that you were unhappy and still letting you go through with it.”
“Rich, you didn’t know-” she started, but he hushed her softly.
“I may not have known everything, but I know you, and I should have realized. I haven’t always been a great brother to you- no, don’t try to deny it- but I’m going to try harder now. Now that I’ve seen you when you’re really happy, I never want to see you any less again.”
Lucy’s lip quivered, but still, no tears fell from her eyes. He smiled at her, wondering when in the world his baby sister had become so grown.
“Now, I believe that it’s your turn,” he said, giving her a pat on the hand. “Shall we?”
She chuckled and nodded. “I’d like nothing else.”
And then they entered the main hall of the small church, and Lucy’s heart instantly fluttered.
She didn’t look at him, not yet, for she was sure she might burst from joy and have to race down the rest of the aisle. So, she looked towards the guests, feeling an unfamiliar warmth wash over her. She had a small family and even fewer friends, and she’d expected her meager list of Hermione and her mother to be overwhelmed by Gregory’s never-ending family.
But the Bridgertons were a different sort of people she was beginning to learn, and they’d done something she hadn’t even considered.
They’d split themselves down the middle, giving her side just as much support as Gregory’s.
It was worth more to Lucy than a thousand prime ministers.
She blinked as she walked down, nodding politely to her newfound family and friends. Her eyes were dying to move- to see the one person she cared for most in the entire room- the entire planet, really.
And then she did it, and the symphony in her mind roared with all its might.
Gregory looked only at her, wearing a grin so bright and so large that it took up half of his face. There she was, in all her glory and wisdom, walking down the aisle to meet him.
He had no idea how he’d missed it when they’d met- how he’d been blinded from just how radiant and splendid and dazzling she was. She was like a tide coming in, subtle at first, but then so overpowering and all-consuming that one wondered how it had gotten there without notice.
God- he loved her so damned much that he was imagining poetry in her honor.
As far as he was concerned, there was no one else in the world as Lucy took the steps toward him, matching his smile with one that made her look even more beautiful than he thought humanly possible. And when she finally made it to him, it took all his strength not to take her into his arms right then and there.
He felt it though, behind her loving eyes and happy smile, the worry that held her. He saw it in her lips- though upturned, tight and burdened.
He smiled and leaned in just a few inches. “How many steps did it take to get to the altar?” he whispered as the priest readied himself.
Lucy’s eyes widened in surprise, but her mouth formed a bashful little smile after a moment. “Twenty-six,” she said, a small, eased sigh escaping her.
He nodded and gave her a small wink before turning back towards the priest.
Throughout the ceremony, though the couple exchanged adoring smiles and loving looks, they remained relatively composed. There were no tears or blubbers, no stutters or stammers.
That was, until the “I do’s”, when both bride and groom forgot their past and thought only of the future, and the tears freely flowed. (And trust that they were nowhere near alone in their reactions- for even Anthony Bridgerton was seen subtly dabbing at his eye with a handkerchief.)
And then it was all sealed with one perfect and loving kiss.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Lucy, Lucy, Lucy,” Gregory said in the bridal carriage as they rode to Bridgerton House, making her name sound as though it were a serenade.
“Gregory,” she whispered, staring at him with the sparkling smile that seemed to be permanently resting on her lips. “I can’t believe this is real.”
He grinned, “No annulment then, I hope?”
She giggled (actually giggled) with delight. “I don’t even think that would be possible at this point.”
“Fantastic, you’re stuck with me then,” Gregory said, pecking her cheek.
“Or you’re stuck with me,” she pointed out, a blush (my word- who was she becoming?) spreading across her cheeks.
“We’re married now, and Benedict told me that marriage requires compromise. So, then, can we agree to disagree, Lady Lucy Bridgerton?”
She laughed softly and nodded as he brought her hand to his lips. “I can agree, Mr. Gregory Bridgerton.”
“I love you, Lucy,” he said, pulling her close to settle themselves against each other.
“I love you, Gregory,” she whispered, laying a soft kiss on his jaw.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The reception, though planned hastily and kept simple, was elegant and lovely, made all the better by the enamored couple and their merry guests. Lunch consisted of foods poised for enjoyment rather than impressions, which proved overly splendid for the group. The newlyweds laughed and smiled over their own favorites- down to the delicious ham sandwiches provided by Anthony and Kate’s kitchen staff.
Cake and sweets following seemed to animate every child in the room (of whom there were many- far more than even dear Lucy could count), and soon enough, everyone was out of their seats and the happy couple had taken their place on the dancefloor.
“Have I told you how marvelous of a dancer you are?” Gregory asked as he twirled her around the room, feeling perfectly in place as he held her in his arms.
She beamed at him, seeming to cherish every word he said more and more. “Maybe, but I will never tire of hearing it.”
He grinned. “I love you, Lucy.”
She smiled. “I love you, Gregory.”
And he loved her when she left his side to comfort one of his nephews who had stubbed his toe on a chair. He loved her so much as she knelt down to meet little William without even a second’s thought about her dress, giving him her greatest smile and managing to say just the right thing to make the boy giggle and hug his new Aunt Lucy.
She loved him when he went to whisper something to Hermione, causing her to blush crimson and adamantly shake her head. But after a few more seconds, Gregory ultimately said the right thing, for her best friend gave him a conceding nod and took Richard’s hand, leading him to the dancefloor. She loved him so much when he laughed in her ear, watching Hermione struggle along with the steps but giggling and enjoying herself all the same.
The room was filled with so much love and happiness that it enveloped the very air, leaving nothing but merriment and contented sighs in it.
It seemed that every guest in the ballroom wanted to wish the happy couple their congratulations, sharing love and kind words.
Anthony and Kate looked onto the pair as if proud parents, promising that they would be around to support them however they required, and Anthony gave Gregory a handshake that was worth more to him than a thousand words.
Benedict and Sophie met them with hugs and an open invitation to My Cottage whenever they so desired, gushing at the infatuated pair. “I don’t think there’s a couple half as perfect,” Sophie whispered in their ears.
Colin and Penelope extended teasing smiles and knowing looks, reassuring them that their doors were free to use whenever needed. “I can respect anyone who enjoys a good kipper as much as I do,” Colin announced loudly to the slight mortification of both women.
Daphne and Simon granted them hearty felicitations, wishing a lifetime of happiness and kind hearts to the newlyweds in addition to their unyielding loyalty. “I’m always happy to extend the privacy of my dressing room,” Daphne said with a wink, causing Lucy to gape at her. “Secrets don’t last very long in this family,” Simon muttered to her before following behind his wife.
Eloise and Phillip gifted them lifelong encouragement and true disbelief at how perfect of a couple they were. “I swear you were in nappies yesterday,” Eloise said, shaking her head incredulously as she gave her baby brother a hug.
Francesca and Michael wished them love and unbreakable attachment, along with an offer to visit Kilmartin whenever England proved to be too tiresome. “Oh, you’ll see,” Francesca added as Michael laughed and gave a little shrug of agreement.
Hyacinth and Gareth offered mixed wishes- the former vowed her undying devotion (while watching Lucy with a rather harsh look), while the latter just chuckled, giving them both a pleasant smile and good tidings. “I’m sure we’ll all be great friends,” was Gareth’s final word before he pulled his wife to the dancefloor.
The little ones (those who were grown enough) came forth as well, led by Lucy’s newfound greatest fan, William. Caroline, in particular, took an immediate liking to her as well after the bride let out an endearing (and rather loud) snort. “Auntie Lucy!” she giggled, giving the new family member a tight hug.
And then, finally, it was time for the last of the Bridgerton brood to come forth, having waited her turn patiently that entire afternoon.
“My darling boy,” Violet cooed as he leaned down to kiss her cheek. She beamed at him, bestowing onto him with the warmth only a good mother can truly provide.
It made Lucy long for the mother she’d never really known, for the care and kindness that Gregory had grown up receiving. Her heart fell for a moment but rose just as quickly as Violet turned to her, and she realized that there was no reason for her to long anymore. The smile she was given was just as sweet as the one gifted to her own son. “And my darling new daughter.”
Though they’d begun with a rocky start, Violet’s kindness couldn’t be helped once she truly met the lovely girl in front of her. No family except for a brother, with late parents and an estranged (and partially deranged) uncle. No one there to offer her the love she needed.
And it only took one glance of Violet seeing the love Lucy bestowed onto Gregory for her to love her as well.
“I’m so pleased to see you two together,” she said, taking the bride’s hand and squeezing it with affection. “To the life you’ll build, and the children you’ll have, and to the love you’ll share.”
And with that, she kissed them both on the cheeks, eyes shining as she was whisked away by a grandchild.
Gregory turned to his new wife and was delightfully surprised to see her eyes brimming with tears. He smiled, taking her hand and pressing a slow kiss to it.
She looked at him through her own wobbly smile, reaching up to flatten his brow with her thumb. “I almost wish that this day could never end."
He raised a brow, a small smile playing on his lips. “Do my ears betray me or is Lady Lucina Abernathy being sentimental?”
“Oh, heavens no,” she shook her head resolutely, though her watery chuckle betrayed her. She looked at him with a sideways smile. “But I have a feeling that Lady Lucy Bridgerton might be an idealist.”
“I hope so,” Gregory said, his own wet eyes matching hers as he wrapped both arms around her, “because I certainly believe in happy endings.”
#bridgerton fic#my fic#grucy#grecy#gregory bridgerton#lucy abernathy#okay so we got!#absolutelyinlove!grucy#stressed!gregory#worried!lucy#annoyingolderbrothers!ABC#perfectSIL!Kate#perfectMIL!Violet#lucy getting everything she deserves in life!#gregory and lucy the happiest couple in london/the world!#also hi leah#I hope you enjoy this
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
Don Giorno fluff alphabet
An A-Z fluff breakdown of how it would be to love and be loved by this golden dreamboat. I may or may not have gotten carried away... *sigh* 🥺💭❤️
Cut for length
Activities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?
Giorno doesn’t have much free time, so the little he has available will be divided between going out to places where you both can enjoy the outdoors and feel the sunshine on your skin. He would also take you to art galleries and museums to indulge in the culture. Every so often, you guys will stay in and just bask in each other’s company.
Beauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?
Naturally he’ll love you overall, inner beauty, outside beauty, everything. However, he’s especially drawn to your eyes. They are the windows to the soul, he loves that he can always see your true feelings by observing your eyes.
Comfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?
The situation would determine Giorno’s actions. If you’re feeling a bit low he will make himself available to talk to you and help you work through your feelings. If you just need a cuddle and words of reassurance he will provide those too. If you’re being consumed by anxiety and panic he will try and calm your breathing to a more even pace and he will talk you down in a calming tone and reassure you that whatever it might be, he will always be there for you.
Dreams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?
Growing up, Giorno didn’t have the happiest childhood. I feel he would yearn for a family of his own. Even though the thought of having children might make him anxious, he would be determined to give them the life he didn’t get to have.
Equal - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?
Giorno would be the dominant one, but very gentle in his treatment of you. His natural charisma will have you submitting without you being aware of it, a perfect combination of Johnathan and Dio.
Fight - Would they easily forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?
Giorno would not want to fight with you. Conflicts will be handled by trying to come to a compromise. If emotions are running really high he would remove himself from the situation until he’s calm enough to discuss everything. If you were the one at fault and you apologized to him, he would forgive you, he can’t stay upset at you.
Gratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?
Giorno appreciates everything you do for him. Regardless of how big or small the gesture is, it means a lot that you’re being thoughtful of him.
Honesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?
Given the nature of what he does, there will be a lot that he would want to keep away from you for your own safety. He will keep the mafia business as separate from his home life as possible.
Inspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?
Giorno would learn how to be more outwardly affectionate and more expressive in general from his s/o. Not having formed secure attachments in his childhood, his s/o would be instrumental in him learning how to trust and reach that level of intimacy with someone.
Jealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?
He’s not someone who easily gets jealous, he trusts you completely. However if a situation does arise where someone is being a bit too familiar with you, he will come to you and casually rest his arm around your waist and draw you against himself. A simple, but clear message.
Kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?
The first kiss was sweet, albeit a bit awkward seeing as you were both young and inexperienced, as you both become more confident the kisses are passionate and leave you both yearning for more.
Love Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?
He would confess in a quiet setting, perhaps during a candlelit dinner, or on a long walk along the coastline, initially being a bit nervous, but generally he would hide his nerves well. He would be forthright but still very sweet and respectful, perhaps using GE to create a single rose for you. He wouldn’t pressure you for an immediate response either, rather giving you some time to consider everything.
Marriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?
Giorno would want to get married when the time is right. The proposal would be very intimate, just the two of you. He would have your ring made to your tastes which he has already discerned from how well he knows you. He would list all the reasons he’s thankful for you and end off with the big question as he slowly takes out the ring box from his pocket. The wedding would be everything you want it to be, he gives you free reign, offering his input when you solicit it. In the marriage, he wants you both to have a peaceful, happy life together, free from conflicts and drama, you’re his safe haven, he will protect that at all costs.
Nicknames - What do they call their s/o?
Mostly terms of endearment in his native Italian dialect. His favorites would be Tesoro, Amore, bella/Bello.
On Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?
People very close to him would be able to tell he’s in love by the softness in his eyes when your name comes up in conversation. Thinking about you instantly puts him in a better mood. When it’s just you two, Giorno in love is like the first sunshine after a storm, it quietly illuminates everything with a warm glow, making you ever so thankful for its existence.
PDA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?
While everyone who needs to know about your relationship does know, he’s not big on PDA or flaunting the relationship in front of others. Any PDA would be chaste, holding your hand every now and then, or putting his arm around your waist. Aside from keeping you safe from potential enemies, he just feels more comfortable being overtly affectionate with you in private. He has to maintain his image as a Don.
Quirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.
Over and above his stand abilities, Giorno has an uncanny ability to read people, so he will always be able to sense when you’re not okay.
Romance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?
He can be very romantic when it comes to showing you how much he loves you. He’s the type of lover to surprise you with something you’ve wanted but have long since forgotten about. He would arrange small, anonymous escapes for the two of you to the countryside. He knows that as much as he can give you material gifts, what you want most from him is his time, so he would think of creative ways in which you & him can escape.
Support - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?
Giorno is supportive of your dreams and goals, having realised dreams of his own, he understands how important it is to have the people closest to you believe in those dreams. So whether your goals are academically inclined, a charitable venture or any other goal, he will support you in any way he can.
Thrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?
Giorno wouldn’t mind trying out different things if you wanted him to, the busy nature of his work keeps things spontaneous though.
Understanding - How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?
Giorno can read you like an open book, he’s very in tune with your feelings and emotions, as mentioned earlier, he is a pro at reading people.
Value - How important is the relationship to them?
He places a large degree of importance on you and the relationship in general. You keep him grounded and he is able to be the truest version of himself around you.
Wild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.
One of Giorno’s guilty pleasures is baking with you. He has quite an affinity for chocolate, and he lives for warm domestic moments with you, so he can indulge in both by doing this.
XOXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?
In the beginning his attempts at physical displays of affection would be slightly awkward, but as he grows more comfortable, he grows to adore receiving as well as giving kisses and cuddles, in private of course.
Yearning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?
He understands that his job will most likely keep him away from you for periods of time. He will always check in on you even if just by text, to make sure that you’re okay, and to let you know how much you mean to him. He knows that he’s returning home to you, which encourages him during particularly difficult times.
Zeal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?
Giorno’s no stranger to being placed in dangerous situations. He will do everything in his power to keep you safe, if anything threatens your wellbeing, he will do everything he can to make sure you remain unharmed.
#giorno giovanna x reader#giorno x reader#giorno giovanna headcanons#don giovanna#don giorno#giorno giovanna#giorno#giogio#jjba giorno giovanna#jjba fluff#domestic fluff#fluff alphabet#jjba#vento aureo#golden wind#jojo's bizarre adventure#jojo no kimyou na bouken#my writing#valentines day
137 notes
·
View notes
Text
a baby and a bad dream
pairing: levi x reader, ft baby kaiya summary: [based off of this prompt request] baby kaiya has a nightmare. warnings: none
Levi had been reluctant from the beginning to leave Kaiya with Eren and Mikasa for the evening. On the flip side, it had been so long since you and Levi had been on a date together and you both missed each other. The longing glances, fleeting touches and cuddles weren’t quite cutting it.
Despite the delicious meal and glass of red wine in front of you, you both are thinking about Kaiya-
“Should I text Eren for an update?” You wonder out loud, “It’s been nearly two hours…”
“He would’ve texted us if anything was wrong,” Levi says unconvincingly. But he takes his phone out first to text both Eren and Mikasa. You roll your eyes fondly at him, reaching over to take some meat off of his plate when you think he isn’t looking. Of course, he notices. Eren replies instantly, with a photo of Kaiya looking at the camera with a big smile, all of her teeth on display. She’s in her favorite pajamas and they’re watching My Neighbor Totoro, one of Kaiya’s recent favorites. She even has a Totoro toy, tucked carefully in her lap.
“See? Everything’s fine,” You murmur but your anxiety is alleviated at the picture of your baby.
“Yeah,” Levi sighs in relief. He puts his phone down for the rest of the night, taking in the way the dimmed lights bounce off of your hair and your skin, making your eyes look like jewels. You had worn one of his favorite dresses on you, it’s a pretty lilac shade with balloon sleeves. The way he looks at you makes you feel beautiful, like you’re the only woman in the world.
You graze his calf with your heeled foot with a smile. “See somethin’ you like?” You ask with an obnoxious wink.
“Yeah, I think this tres leches cake sounds good,” Levi says, lips quirking up at your affronted whining.
“I meant me,” You roll your eyes, “Though, yes, that tres leches cake sounds way more tempting than even me in this dress.”
“Now that’s just not true,” Levi says, “You look lovely. I just know that you’re thinking with your sweet tooth, angel.”
“My man knows me so well,” You sigh dreamily, chin in the palm of your hands, “No wonder you got me pregnant.”
“Ma’am, I believe it was a mutual decision.”
“Ma’am?!”
Levi rolls his eyes at you fondly, reaching over the table to squeeze your hand. Once you both finish your plates and let the food digest, you order a slice of tres leches cake to share. Levi isn’t that fond of sweets, but he might risk it all for a bite of a good tres leches cake.
This restaurant had raving reviews over its tres leches cake, which is why you had chosen it for date night.
You moan happily at the first bite of the cake, feeding Levi a piece off of your spoon before you even finish your own.
“That’s damn good cake,” Levi murmurs, leaning forward to wipe a stray crumb from the corner of your lips.
“Even better than mine?” You ask coyly with a smirk.
“Come on, angel,” Levi says with a quirk of his eyebrow, “You know your cake is the only cake for me.”
The innuendo isn’t lost on you and your face heats up. When you leave, Levi walks with you with a hand on the small of your back and his blazer around your shoulders. You’re so irrevocably his, the scent of his cologne surrounding the both of you and encasing you in your own bubble.
Levi takes his time with you when you arrive home, his hands pliant but firm over your body. His touches light you up, his kisses feeding your flame. You’re reminded of his love once more, and he is reminded of yours.
By the time you go to Eren’s apartment to pick up Kaiya, it’s nearly eight in the evening. You’re certain she’s fighting off sleep, and from the picture that Mikasa had sent you, your suspicions were correct. She’s already asleep when you get to Eren’s apartment, tucked under her favorite blanket.
Levi interrogates Eren about Kaiya, making sure she had eaten her fruits and vegetables and hadn’t watched television until very late. She’s prone to nightmares when she watches tv late at night. Eren swallows nervously, reassuring you and Levi that Kaiya was nothing short of perfect.
“She’s a great kid,” Eren says, “Much like her parents-”
“Don’t be such a kiss ass, Eren,” You say, stifling your laugh. Eren looks at you with wide, green eyes, looking like a fish out of water.
“Close your mouth Eren, you’ll swallow a fly,” Levi says lightly, “Thank you both for watching Kaiya. We appreciate it.”
Levi tries to give them both money but they both refuse. You wish they’d accept it- after all, you had been a college student once. They’ve both helped you out more times than you can count.
Levi takes Kaiya in his arms, making sure the blanket is wrapped around her completely. You take her stuffed toy under your arm and wave Eren and Mikasa a final goodbye, with promises that you’ll take them out to lunch this week.
You’re fast asleep next to Levi in bed, having fallen asleep mid-kiss. But Levi is wide awake suddenly, hearing Kaiya’s rustling in her bed and her soft whines and whimpers.
He hears her start to cry and mutter in her sleep, and he hops out of bed instantly, sleep washed away at the sound of his baby’s distress. Kaiya is still asleep, her eyes squeezed closed. Levi’s heart lurches when she cries out again, crying out for him and for you.
Levi maneuvers himself into her bed, curling into her and cuddling her closely. He doesn’t want to wake her up abruptly and scare her more, so he waits for her to wake up on her own.
“Kaiya,” Levi murmurs, running a hand over her cheek and her forehead, “It’s just a bad dream. Gonna kill Eren for letting you watch tv late. Wake up, Kai. It’s okay.”
When Kaiya finally does come out of her nightmare, she turns her head to look at Levi with big, dark eyes.
“Daddy,” Kaiya coos sadly, “Bad dweam! Todo eat me, you an’ Mama!”
“Todo ate us? That’s okay. I’m not goin’ anywhere, sweetheart,” Levi says, rubbing her back. He sits with her for a few minutes, letting her get acquainted with being awake. Levi rubs her arm and brings her into his lap, brushing his lips over her hair and her forehead for kisses. Kaiya giggles softly when he tickles her belly lightly and she holds his hand.
“Mama? Where mama?” Kaiya whispers, looking around her bedroom.
“Let’s go find mama,” Levi says, scooping her up in his arms and bringing her Totoro toy with him.
“Daddy, that scawy,” Kaiya confesses and sighs when she sees you starting to wake up.
“What happened, baby?” You say, opening your arms to her. She jumps into your arms sleepily and you rub her back soothingly.
“Bad dweam,” Kaiya sighs, already being lulled into sleep.
“Totoro ate us,” Levi says flatly and you stifle a surprised laugh.
“Not Totoro…” You whisper and adjust Kaiya in your arms. She has your shirt fisted in her chubby fist as she sleeps quickly and you press a kiss to her forehead.
“It’s ‘cause Eren let her watch tv late,” Levi rolls his eyes. You swat his chest and keep Kaiya in between both of you, your hands intertwining with Levi’s over Kaiya’s back. You kiss Levi goodnight, snuggle close to both of them and Levi waits for both of his girls to fall asleep. He allows the veil of sleep to wash over him quickly.
tags: @simpingmaize @captainchrisstan
163 notes
·
View notes
Text
Personal Assistant pt. 1
Hi. I’m in complete and utter Obey Me! Hell Enjoy some Lucifer x MC smut shamelessly put into a modern day CEO!Lucifer AU. Many parts to come. I’m completely covered in filth and thirst. Unbeta’d because we die like heroes here. Let me go back to being a gremlin now.
Paring: Lucifer x MC Wordcount: 5,000 ish Genre: Shameless, filthy smut Tags: Multiple Orgasms, sex on a desk, Finger fucking, overstimulation
Part 2: here Part 3: here Part 4: here Part 5: Here Part 6: Here Part 7: Here Also found on Ao3: Here
Lucifer has been sent to the human realm to study them and acclimate to and learn about their behaviors. By some miracle, you landed a job interview with his illustrious company as his personal assistant. A lot of extra work not listed on the job posting is required of you, to say the least.
Part 1: Interview
Adapting to the human world wasn’t hard. Humans were after all, predictable little things, easily swayed by their desires, it didn't take much effort at all to make them bend to his will. Lucifer’s time thus far ‘learning’ about the human realm had netted him a sizable company under his control. It wasn’t long before he became bored of that. Being a CEO of Akuzon meant many things. One being that he was always busy and needed some help around his office. Previous attempts at having a personal assistant failed him as they never satisfied his needs and kept up with the workload.
Somehow, you found yourself looking at the ad in the paper and hastily applying to the job It seemed too good to be true. It paid well, was for a reputable company, was close to home, and you fit the criteria listed. It was a shot in the dark, you knew there must be hundreds of others clamoring for the position as well. However, much to your surprise only a couple of weeks passed when you received an email requesting your presence for an interview.
The office building was massive, fitting right in with the many sky scrapers of the city. After putting on the best interview clothes you had and making your makeup was on point, you had thought you were ready for anything. Seeing the building and stepping inside it’s grand spaces had you faltering for a moment, a shiver of nervousness running down your spine. Almost everyone in the vicinity stopped what they were doing to see who it was at their front door. The nervousness increased as their gazes bored down into you, making you think you had gotten the wrong building.
“Are you here for an interview?” A young lady at the front desk asked cheerfully, noticing how lost you seemed.
“Ah! Yes! I am! For the position of Lucifer’s secretary.” You explained, relieved that there were some helpful people there.
The lady raised an eyebrow, surprised that someone so green would be chosen for such a high ranking position, but didn’t press the issue any further. Dialing a few numbers into the phone at her desk, she made a quick call. “Yes, she’s here… I’ll bring her right up.” She looked up at you, a sweet smile on her face and got up to guide you to the elevators on the other side of the floor. “He’ll be ready to see you once you get to his floor.”
“His floor?”
“Yes. His office is one of the top floors of the building. As his secretary, you’ll be responsible for taking care of it as well as any other duties he asks of you.” She explained. “You’re so lucky… I applied for that position ages ago, but couldn’t pass the interview phase. I hope you fare better than me.”
“I hope so too…” You agreed, hoping to hide the shaking in your voice.
The trip to the top floor seemed to stretch forever. The light music in the background did little to soothe your anxiety as you watched the numbers climb higher and higher until they stopped at 60 and the doors slid smoothly open after a soft chime.
“Well, this is where I leave you. He’s right beyond those doors.” The lady gave you a small reassuring push forward and before you could have any second thoughts, the doors closed and you were left alone, facing tall frosted glass doors. Taking one last stuttering breath, you took the steps forward to push open the doors. They were much heavier than expected and after a bit of a struggle, you finally managed to open it.
Before you sat the most impeccable man you had ever seen. The very image of power in a young and handsome man. The name plate placed at the very edge confirmed to you that he was indeed to be the man who was going to be conducting the interview. It was difficult to get your mind past how handsome he was. His perfectly parted hair framed his face and its long, delicate features. He wore a black fitted suit, one that probably cost more than any number you could imagine. Each stitch in its place to accentuate the lines of his body and to cut an imposing figure, even when seated. Everything about him oozed control and power. You had every right to be nervous.
He sat behind a massive desk; the only documents in front of him were what you expected to be your files. Most everything else, save for his nameplate, had been cleared off. If he had done this to intimidate you, he was doing an exceptionally good job without even saying a damn thing. “Come in. Have a seat. I’ve been expecting you.” He beckoned and gestured at the seat in front of him, his eyes raking up and down your figure, assessing everything about you. All the while, you were powerless to deny his request. His voice was soothing, low and lulled you into a strange sense of security.
Sinking into the seat in front of the desk, you sat just at the edge, reminding yourself to keep your posture proper and to keep your appearance as professional as possible. You needed to employ every trick in the book in order to succeed in the interview; and Lucifer knew that. His expression was unreadable as he waited for you to settle in, his hands idly flipping through your resume. “So, tell me, what do you think you can bring to this company working for me?”
Ah, there it was, the interview questions. You had prepared for this and the answer you rehearsed fell easily from your lips. “I have a lot of experience in working as an office manager. I understand that my duties may extend past what was listed in the job posting. However, I am willing to take in the extra hours and to work whatever job is given to me to ensure that your position and your reputation remains as impeccable as it has always been since the start. I will bring a new level of efficiency in your workflow and I will be a great asset to your company as such.”
He hummed, seeming uninterested in what you had to say. You began to sweat a bit at the back of your neck. Perhaps he had expected something more unique? Once again, he flipped through the pages of your resume, not really reading anything, just looking at the information you had put down. “I see… And how do you deal with pressure or stressful situations?”
Again, another question you had prepared for. “The easiest way to diffuse stressful stressful situations or overwhelming workloads is to make extensive lists. I like to break things down into their basic components so that large tasks are much more manageable in a timely manner.
He hums again, a vague sound of approval this time, nodding only slightly before making a mark on the papers in front of him. “Very good. Final question. How do you like to be managed?” His eyes flick up to you and there’s something in the way he gazes in your direction that makes your heart beat faster. There was something in the way his eyes trailed up and down your body that had you sitting up straighter than before.
“As long as I have clear direction, I will be able to work independently or as a team as needed.”
Much to your surprise, Lucifer smiles at the answer, circling something on the paper before getting up and sauntering over to you. “That’s very good to hear.” he said quietly, turning to look out the floor to ceiling windows to the cityscape his office overlooked. “There will be a lot of times where I can be demanding and ask you to stay later than usual hours. Will your priority still be this job if I ask this of you?”
You swallowed, not sure how you felt about the question, his tone had an undercurrent of electric energy that had you heating up and shivering at the same time. “Y-yes.” You stated after a brief pause, entranced by the curve of his spine and how well his pants fit his ass. “I can do that. I plan on making this position more than a job. I am looking for a career here.”
Lucifer nodded again, still not making any eye contact with you, which gave you plenty more time to ogle at how his posture and his stance against the window struck such a formal and imposing figure. At this point, he could tell you to work three twenty hour shifts in a row and you wouldn’t complain. The prospect of a hot boss, great pay and a job that was close to home was too tempting to you.
“If you accept this position, you will be placed on a probation period, as is customary for this company.” He explained and your heart started to beat faster. Did this mean you landed the job? You couldn’t tell if he was psyching you up for potential disappointment or if he was genuinely starting to offer you the job. “Once I’ve gone over your performance during your probationary period, your salary will increase. Additional raises and bonuses will be offered as I see fit for… exceptional work.” You couldn’t see it, but rather, you felt him smirking at his reflection in his reflection. “Does that sound acceptable to you?”
“Yes…” You breathed, mouth watering at the aspect of being able to make so much money. It was more than any other job you worked for paid.
Humans were such easy little playthings to control.
Lucifer walked back to you, standing in front of his desk and leaning against the heavy wood. “Your job will be of course to do what I request, many times without question. There will be many sensitive documents that you will handle and that requires your utmost confidentiality.”
“I understand.” You said bluntly, trying to calm your heart and your breathing to no avail.
“You understand that this position also may also involve some after hours activities which I will ask for you to partake in. They are not written on the job description, but they are paramount to this position. Don’t worry… I’ll be sure you receive clear and concise directions on exactly what to do as my personal assistant.”
You blinked. The way he worded the phrase seemed off, but you couldn’t put your finger on what. It was odd, he had always referred to the job as ‘this position’ until just now. It was the first time the actual job title until he tugged at the cuffs of his suit, undoing the buttons. “Oh…” You breathed, eyes wide, cheeks blushing brightly when you realized what he meant, the bulge in his pants was all the proof you needed for there to be absolutely no miscommunication. From the looks of it, you could only surmise that he was barely half mast in that state. Fuck, what kind of monster is he hiding in there?
“Before we sign the papers and you accept the job, I would like to do a test run to make sure you’re a good fit for the company.”
“Yes… of course.” You were practically panting, eyes blown wide and cheeks flushed. You pressed your legs together trying to hide the arousal that started pooling there after the realization that you would be servicing your future boss in rather intimate ways. That fact alone had you ready to sign whatever contract he produced in a heartbeat.
“We’ll begin by seeing how good you are at following directions. Stand up, please.” He flicked his fingers upward, eyes traveling up and down your body, knowing exactly the kind of reaction he was pulling out of you.
You were upon your feet in an instant, hands at your side, back straight as a board and your legs together. You barely dared to breathe as he left his spot on his desk to circle you. You could feel his gaze taking in every detail. He was close enough for you to smell the cologne he wore waft past you as he passed your side and you suppressed a shiver.
“What kind of posture is this?” He chided, pressing the spot between your shoulder blades gently, pushing your shoulders back. “Just because you’re standing up straight does not mean you’re doing it properly.” Lucifer tsked, shaking his head slightly. “How do you expect to represent me and this company if you look like a cardboard cut out.” His hands left a trail of goosebumps across your skin as he adjusted your body as he saw fit. Your hands folded neatly in front of you, your legs now just shoulder width apart and your shoulders back, he took another circle around you to reassess your stance. “Much better.” He murmured. “It will do you well to remember how this feels. I won’t be so lenient if I see you looking so foolishly in front of a client.”
You nodded, memorizing just how he had posed your body, reminding yourself to practice in the mirror. You didn’t dare speak unless he gave you permission to, just something about how he stalked around you made it impossible to raise any objections.
“Stay still unless I say otherwise.” Lucifer commanded next. “It’s important that you are at attention no matter what the circumstances. When I ask for your… special services, you will refer to me as Sir.” His finger traced the hem of your pencil skirt, pulling it up just a bit and you fought back the urge to flinch. “But of course, I should say that right now, you have the power to stop this at any time. Understood?”
“Yes…”
“Yes who?” Lucifer’s tone was sharp and the hand playing at the hem of your skirt moved to place a firm spank on your ass. The pain coursing down your leg, you jumped a bit, but remembered his command to stay still.
“Yes… Sir…”
“Good.” He nearly purred, leaning in to kiss the shell of your ear, his breath hot against your skin and his hand once again traveled to the hem of your skirt, playing with the fabric and pulling it up until he got a good view of the lacy lucky panties you decided to wear that day. “Very good.” he praises, tracing his fingers across the flimsy fabric. Your breath hitches as he brushes light touches across your bare skin. You stay still, demanding that your body stop trembling, though Lucifer can clearly tell just how nervous you are, shaking like a little lamb at his behest. In a show of dominance, he lets your skirt fall back down, cupping your face to pull you into a heated kiss.
Your mind is practically blank at this point, hands still clasped in front of you, gripping each other like your life depended on it while he claimed your lips and took your breath away. At some point you had reciprocated, kissing him back and earning a low growl from the back of his throat as a reward. He pulled away, your lipstick smeared across his face and his eyes glittering in lust as he looked at your disheveled form in perfect posture. “Hmm… yes… I think you’ll fit right into my needs.” He appraised, rubbing his chin and smirking. The expression sends a shiver down your spine but you didn’t dare move.
His hand guides you two steps forward towards his desk. “Bend over.” He commands and you oblige, your chest laying on the surface of the mahogany desk. Your hips flush against the edge of it while your hands stretched out to grasp at what it could to stay still as he asked. He readjusts you again, spreading your legs further, straining the fabric of your skirt. With a tsk of frustration, he pulled the offending piece of clothing up to your waist, letting the cool AC hit the back of your thighs and allowing him to spread your legs even further. In your heels, you could feel your calves tremble as you struggled to keep the position he had set for you. Thankful for the desk to cling onto, you used it to ground yourself as your ass is exposed to him. Your legs spread to the point where you were bent sharply, completely level with the desk and your hot core could feel the air conditioning blow past your heated nether lips. “You look good spread across my desk like this. I’ll be sure to make use of this position often.” He commented, rubbing your ass gently, teasing you through the fabric of your panties. His fingers brush across the wet spot on your panties and you can feel the it mold against your wet heat. Embarrassed, you stifled the whine that formed at the back of your throat. Even if the two of you were on a separate floor from others, you didn’t know if there were others right outside those heavy glass doors.
His teasing seemed to last forever and you could just see how much he was enjoying it whenever you dared to glance up and see your lewd reflection in the mirror with that salacious grin on his face as he fingered you oh so gently and left you on the edge of wanting more. Every time you glanced up even briefly, he always made sure to make eye contact with you in the reflection, knowing just how much you were affected by his basic touches.
Of course, he wasn’t getting out of the exchange with nothing. The slight bulge in his pants earlier had strained into an impressive tent seeing his new assistant splayed out before him, eager to please. Humans were such predictable creatures. Predictable, yet so much fun to toy with. He couldn’t get enough of the soft sighs that came from your lips as you held back your noises. It only made him want to see break for him even more. His slender, manicured fingers finally gave you a little relief, pressing against the wet spot in your panties and following the curves of your pussy lips that had molded themselves there due to your slick. At that, your hips bucked back, urging him to give him more but a firm hand on your lower back stopped any further movements. “I did not say you could move.”
You whined, clutching onto the edge of the desk, your fingers sore and locking up from how hard you were holding on. You weren’t sure how you were going to handle this sort of treatment on the regular when the trial run was already driving you mad with need. As if he could sense your impatience, he finally pulled down your panties, allowing your legs a brief reprieve as he took them off and tossed them to the side before making you resume the position you had held for who knew how long.
“For a trial run, you’re doing very well.” He cooed, smirking as he saw your glistening folds. “I should remind you that there are people still working in the building. We may have a floor to ourselves, but please keep that in mind and don’t scream too loudly now.” He chuckled darkly, tracing the curve of your ass and finally sinking a finger into your heat. Just the feeling of being penetrated by something had you keening and you struggled to keep yourself from screaming. “Ooh, that’s a pretty noise you make… Please make more of those.” he encouraged, slowly sliding his finger in and out of you.
“Y-yes sir.” You panted, your legs ached, but the pain was absolutely nothing compared to the pleasure that was building up in your abdomen just from feeling a finger slowly fuck you. You had come in for an interview and your soon to be boss was unraveling you in ways you had only fantasized about. All the while, Lucifer remained the very image of composure, if it weren’t for his very obvious hard on being pressed against the back of your thigh, you would have thought he was impervious to the scene he had orchestrated. Every time his finger dragged itself out of you, you let out an appreciative mewl, mind reeling as he pressed every button he needed for you to submit completely to him.
You lost track of time and how many times he left you wanting more with how his finger moved in and out of you. At some point, he had added a second, then a third, deliciously stretching you out. You were so wet and ready for him, you could feel your essence drip down your thighs as your legs struggled to keep you upright. Lucifer was patient, he had lived several millennia already, edging you until you were a begging mess on top of his desk for a few hours was absolutely nothing to him.
In a show of surprising restaurant, he pressed hot kisses against the back of your neck, nipping at your skin whenever you let out a particularly breathy sigh. The scent of sex and his cologne enveloped you and you were practically dizzy with need. ���Sir…” You whined after he had curled his fingers in you, making you see stars and your walls trembled, clenching around his fingers. “Please… I need more…”
“Oh?” He asked, raising an eyebrow and removing his fingers, much to your dismay. He watched in amusement as your pussy twitched, clenching around air now that his fingers were no longer filling you. Glancing at the clock on the wall, he was surprised how long you had held out before you were begging for him. His erection had pressed against his impeccably tailored pants for so long, it was almost painful, yet, he couldn’t let you have your way just yet. Even if it was a trial, he still wanted to see just how far he could push you. “You think you really deserve more? You haven’t even gotten this job yet.”
His fingers were back on your wet, sopping cunt, sliding up and down your labia, rubbing slow, firm circles around your clit. You wailed, bucking your hips and forgetting the command to stay still until his other hand reminded you by spanking your ass cheek. “No moving.” He growled and you struggled to obey, stilling your body even though every part of you screamed to squirm and beg for him. “You will get more when I decide you get more.”
You could only nod in reply, letting him use your body as he saw fit. “For your next test. You will cum when I tell you to.” he breathed, pressing his finger against your clit, making you choke back a sob of pleasure. “After that, I promise you, you’ll be at the last part of the interview.”
“Yes, Sir. I’ll do what you want, Sir. Whatever you say, Sir.” You babbled mindlessly, your body aching for relief and release. The torture and pleasure he could pull out of you with just his fingers had your mind jumping to the future to what other things he could elicit out of you.
“Good girl.” He praised, patting your hair in a surprisingly soft gesture. He followed the gentleness with a chaste kiss on your lips before going right back to being the commanding figure you had met him as. He plunged his fingers into you again, knuckle deep and pumping in and out of you furiously, loving the way your walls fluttered and clenched as you held off on your orgasm until he permitted it. “You are so obedient… just what I like.” He praised breathlessly, working you closer and closer to the point of no return.
You couldn’t think straight, you didn’t care if others heard the lewd sounds coming from your lips as you whined, begging for release. You were so close, you wanted to cum so badly, but your determination to pass his test outweighed your desire and you held out until his silky voice whispered the blissful word into your ear. “Cum…” He purred and you gratefully crumbled, your body spasming around his fingers, milking it like it was his cock. Soft whines escaped your lips and tears of gratitude streaked down your face.
“Thank you, Sir.” You panted, blissed out and feeling weightless after such a powerful orgasm. Your vision blurred as you stared blankly at the wall, wondering if this was the end of the interview. Lucifer’s fingers leaving your sore pussy sure seemed to signal that things had reached a conclusion. Glancing up at the reflection in the windows, you flushed bright red when you saw Lucifer lewdly cleaning his fingers off with his tongue.
“Hmm… I think you would do well.” He said once his fingers no longer shone with your essence. He sauntered over to the other side of the desk where you clung onto for dear life. Sinking into his chair, he casually opened up one of the drawers, pulling out a contract and placing it in front of you. “If you believe you can keep up with my demands, then all you have to do is sign on the dotted line at the bottom. He slid you an ornate fountain pen into your hand.
Your trembling digits could barely hold onto the pen and you moved to start reading the contract, going over the terms and conditions of your new position. Most of it was the basic business jargon seen in every typical job. There were a few things that seemed out of place, but in your just fucked state of mind, it was very difficult to focus on what about them seemed wrong. Unable to really think straight about what you were getting yourself into, you placed the pen onto the paper, eager to start your new job.
Just as you the pen started to move, you heard the sound of a zipper being undone and the hard erection you had felt earlier on the back of your thigh now pressed up against your sore pussy. You gasped, eyes going wide at the feeling of being stretched out once again. “Well? Will you sign?” He asked casually, sinking into you inch by inch as you struggled to breath and think, let alone sign a contract.
“Yes… Yes, Sir…” you whined, starting to shakily write your name as he bottomed out inside of you. He hissed, taking a hold of your hips and roughly slamming them back into him to get as much contact as he could. You yelped, unable to write your name at all. Your hips banged against the edge of the desk with every one of his rough thrusts. No doubt, there would be dark bruises there the next day reminding you exactly what you did to get the job you were signing for now.
With each pass, Lucifer lets a little more of himself go, grunting in effort as he relished in the feeling of your hot walls surrounding him. He hadn’t found such an obedient human in a long time. It would be such a fun time for him to push your limits every day you were in his office. What he offered now was only a glimpse of what he had planned for you. Every time your hand stuttered in the middle of signing your name, his grin widened. The closer you were to sealing the contract with him, the closer he was to his own release that he had been holding back for hours now.
“Just a little more…” he urged, slowing down his thrusts so you had at least some time to get a few more letters of your name out. Just as you finished, he let out a primal growl, slamming his hips into yours, the sound of skin slapping against skin echoed in the room as he fucked you without abandon. The fountain pen fell from your fingers and you were back to clutching onto the edge of the desk as yet another explosive orgasm started to build in you.
Glancing up into the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of what Lucifer looked like while he was coming undone inside of you, you were surprised at the image you saw. It was only for a brief moment, but you swore you saw horns on him, and dark, feathery wings framing his body. The sound of the pen you dropped falling to the floor broke the illusion and the image of the prim and proper business man with an utterly feral look was all you saw.
He knew he wouldn’t last long once he entered you and so, he chased his release inside of you. As soon as the contract was signed, he was done for. His hand snaked around your abused waist to reach for your clit, bringing you to climax in time with his own. With a grateful groan, he released all the pent up tension in him, spilling his hot seed deep inside of you while your walls spasmed around him, milking every inch of him and accepting what he had given you. “Very good…” he cooed, his eyelids fluttering as he relished in the rush that came after such an explosive climax.
You whined, your body bruised and beaten, but also feeling absolutely boneless and euphoric. You hadn’t experienced anything like that before and it was all rather mindblowing to say the least. The contract in front of you with your shaky signature, ink blots from when you lost control of the pen and a fair amount of your tears stared back at you. This was your future. This would be a regular part of your life going forward; and you didn’t feel a shred of regret from it. You zoned out for a moment, hardly believing that it was all real.
Lucifer’s cock slipping out of you and the feeling of his cum dripping out of you snapped you back to reality. “Very good job. I’ll say you passed all the tests with flying colors.” He said, fixing his suit and continuing on as if he hadn’t just fucked the living daylights out of you. “I expect you to come in on Monday ready to work. I have a lot of filing for you to catch up with.”
He smirked, taking the signed contract and slipping it back into his desk. He cupped your chin in his hand and planted soft kisses on your lips, once again leaving you dizzy and breathless. “You are free to move now.” He said and you gratefully worked on closing your sore legs, wondering how you were going to make it out the office in the state that you were in. You weren’t sure you were able to walk, let alone get all the way home with how weak you were. Lucifer chuckled, dialing a few numbers into his cellphone. “I’ll arrange for a ride home for you.” He offered. “As a thank you for such a lovely interview.”
You breathed a sigh of relief, knowing you had a way to get back without catching too many unwanted stares at your disheveled state. “Thank you, Sir.”
“Lucifer.” He corrected briskly.
“Thank you, Lucifer. I’ll be sure to arrive on time Monday.” You sank into the chair to gather your wits about you, staring at your trembling hands.
“Good.” He said coolly and looking up at him, you gasped when you saw him casually twirling your panties on one finger as he looked down at you. “Your ride should be here shortly, please make sure you’re presentable, you do not want to dishonor me.”
“Yes. Of course, Lucifer.” you hastily combed your hand through your hair, hoping to take care of the worst of the flyaways. You glanced nervously at the panties in his hand, figuring they were a lost cause at this point and simply accepted the fact that you’d be taking this arranged ride with your boss’ cum dripping down your thigh. Carefully standing up, you remembered to assume the proper posture he had shown you earlier and he smiled in approval.
“Very good.” He gestured to the heavy glass doors, opening them as if with magic with a press of a button. “I’ll see you Monday.”
“Yes,Lucifer.” You replied obediently, taking the first shaky steps out.
“Oh, and one more thing.” he called out to your retreating form. You turned, blinking and wondering what else he could want from you. “Wear the same lipstick, will you? I’d love to see what that color looks like smeared all over my cock.”
“Yes, of course. As you wish.” You replied, blushing a deep red and rushing out of the office now, high off of getting the coveted position of Lucifer’s personal assistant and the prospect of what else he could ask you to do for him.
Watching you slip into the elevator, Lucifer smiled to himself. He reached into his desk and pulled out the contract, skimming the terms and conditions you had agreed to.
Humans were terribly predictable. Yet, they were also infinitely entertaining.
#Obey me#lucifer x mc#smut#obey me smut#my writing#i'm trash you're trash we're all trash#shameless smut
452 notes
·
View notes
Text
Childhood dreams
» Hitoshi Shinso x male reader
» Fandom: My hero academia » Summary: Shinso tries to reconnect with you after a fight » Warnings: Small Season 5/Manga spoilers! language, anxiety, overthinking » Words: 2.1k
You can find a link to my Masterlist and additional info in my bio and pinned post
“We are going to become heroes together.”
That is the pinkie promise Shinso has been holding onto this whole time. The promise that has inspired him, that has given him hope, that has made him want to do is very best. But in the end, it did not work out.
Every single time Shinso watches you walk down the halls among other students of class 1-A, your voice saying those words to him echoes in his head. He keeps his distance, since he does not want you to catch him staring at you, not after all the things he said to you.
Becoming heroes together was his and your childhood dream. Growing up, he and you watched the heroes on TV together, talked about the news, imagined yourselves as a duo of great heroes. You were one of the only kids in Shinso’s class who never shied away from replying to Shinso and he admired that about you. And whenever another child told him he would make a better villain, you always stepped in and reassured him.
However, the dream died quickly – at least for Shinso. He knew that there was no way for him to pass the entrance exam for the hero course at UA, but you seemed to hold onto that dream still. Long story short, Shinso ended up failing where you succeeded, leading to the very first serious fight in your friendship, that was also the last one.
Shinso does not remember anything as clearly as the words he said to you that day. When you told him you were sorry that he did not pass the exam and expressed your genuine sadness over that fact, he snapped at you.
“I can’t believe that you held onto this naïve dream all this time, that’s childish,” he told you. “I don’t need you to pity me, I don’t need you to look down on me like all the others do.” He can remember calling you childish, blaming you for the quirk you were born with that will make you a great hero, telling you that your promise was the reason why he was feeling so disappointed in himself after failing.
He still feels awful about it and he does not blame you for not talking to him again after that.
Shinso sometimes finds himself pitying himself for losing you. When he watches you in the hallways, he can feel his heart ache. He lost his best friend, his future sidekick – or according to you – the hero he would be the sidekick of. He lost an important part of his life. And that hurts. He misses you, he misses the days the two of you spent together, the way his heartbeat picked up in pace when you were around him and the way you never failed to cheer him up. There are things he never told you and now he regrets it.
He does not know if he would ever tell you any of this and the only thing that he knows for sure is that he wants you back. Though he is not sure about how to achieve that.
“Shinso! Watch out!” The voice of his teacher pulls Shinso back into reality but the wake-up call comes too late and he finds himself falling to the ground, tangled up in his capture weapon and unsure if he still has all of his limbs attached in the right places. “Ouch!” Shinso groans as he tries to untangle himself.
Instead of helping him, Mister Aizawa starts to lecture him. Having heard the same bullshit about him being very far behind class 1-A and thus having to train even harder, needing to concentrate and so on and so forth, Shinso decides to not pay too much attention to that. It takes him a few more seconds to finally free himself but he remains sitting on the ground, rubbing his hurting back.
“You are more distracted than usual, did something happen?” Shinso is surprised that his teacher would ever ask him something like that. “It’s nothing,” he replies dryly but that does not seem to satisfy Mister Aizawa. “I can’t help you train when you keep getting distracted, that’s a waste of time. So either you talk about what’s up and we continue training after you’ve got your mind clear, or you go home right now.”
Shinso takes a second to consider his teacher’s words. His eyes fall onto the capture weapon in his hands, his key to becoming a hero. And he needs to take this chance. He cannot waste any more time with distractions and dwelling in memories. This is his chance. His chance to finally tell you that you will indeed become heroes together, maybe he will make up with you. The thought of approaching you to tell you this both scares and excites him.
“There’s this guy in your class,” he starts. “Y/N. We wanted to become heroes together, but it didn’t work out. Said some pretty awful stuff to him. I’ve been thinking about how to tell him that our dream will come true after all.” His mentor looks a little irritated at that “Well, you are not in the hero course just yet, so you should do your best. Now get up again.”
Shinso groans once again bug gets up anyway. His legs are shaking a little from how much he has been straining his muscles, but he tries to ignore that.
“I encourage you to talk to Y/N and sort things out,” Aizawa continues after a pause. “He doesn’t seem like the kind of person to hold grudges, so it should be fine after you apologize.” It is not a lot of reassurance, but it is more than Shinso would have ever expected from his mentor, so he appreciates it. “I’ll try to talk to him soon,” he agrees. His mentor nods. “Now enough chitchat, let’s get back to work.”
___
Shinso stretches his arms out above his head, his muscles ache, and his joints crack. Everything in his body screams for him to go to his dorm and sleep, but he still has something to do. He checks his phone for the time once again. It is almost seven in the evening, he is a little too early, since he stopped in front of the 1-A Alliance right after his training and he did not even bother to bring his bag into his own dorm. Shinso is surprised that you agreed to meet him after all this time, and he is both thankful and relieved that you seem to be open to hear him out. That is what he needs right now, after all.
Even though he is usually calm and collected, Shinso feels his anxiety being on the rise. His heart is beating way too fast and he feels uneasy. He quickly wipes his sweaty palms on his pants. A few deep breaths. One, two, three. His mind spins. Four, five, six. All of the words Shinso has thought of disappear. Seven, eight-
“Hey, Shinso!” You close the door of the 1-A building behind you. You avoid his eyes as you walk toward him, hands in your pockets, shoulders tense. The fact that you called him by his last name hurts but Shinso quickly shakes his head. This is not what he should be thinking about now. “H- hey,” he greets you, trying his best to sound calm. “Do you mind if we walk for a while?”
There is an uncomfortable silence between the two of you and all Shinso can hear are his own and your footsteps on the gravel. You eventually sit down on a bench, a lot of space between you. Shinso stares at his balled fists in his lap, knuckles white and fingernails digging into his palm, trying to sort out his thoughts.
“Why do you want to talk to me?” you question after a while. Shinso sighs deeply. The phrases he has thought of and practiced in the mirror are not coming to his mind again. “I wanted to apologize,” he starts hesitantly, “for what I said to you after the entrance exam.” The scene replays in his mind once again and he shakes his head to push the pictures away. “I was in the wrong and I hurt you. I know that I’m extremely late with my apology, but I was so ashamed of myself for saying those things to you.” In the corner of his eye, Shinso sees you listen to him carefully, a thoughtful look on your face. “I don’t expect you to forgive me. I just wanted to get this off my chest. I’m sorry, Y/N.” There is so much more he wants to say, he just needs to remember it. It seems like you notice that he is struggling for words, so you wait patiently. So, this is not going terribly, right?
“I saw you at the sports festival,” Shinso finally continues. “And I saw how much you have improved. You will be a great hero, Y/N. I’m happy for you. I’m so, so happy for you.” Was that alright? Shinso has no idea. He finally opens his fists and stretches out his fingers, knuckles regaining colour, but he is sure that his nails left marks on his palms. “What I said was horrible. I’d understand if you’d want me to get lost. I just want you to know that I’m sorry.”
“I-” you sound unsure of what to say. “You are right, what you said hurt me a lot, you have no idea how much. But I appreciate that you apologized, Shinso, even though it’s late. And I want to accept your apology.” An incredible weight falls from Shinso’s shoulders. He breathes out deeply and lets the rest of his muscles relax. For a moment, Shinso waits for you to say something else. He does not want to be the first one to speak, and it seems like you do not want to be that person either.
The silence grows more and more uncomfortable. Around you, it is getting colder by the minute and at some point, the lantern above the bench turns on, attracting insects to its cold, dim light. You shiver and stuff your hands in your pockets, Shinso does the same.
“So where do we go from here?” You eventually ask and cause Shinso’s heart to skip a beat. Does that mean you still want him in your life? Does that mean that he can stay friends with you? “That’s up to you,” he answers while suppressing his excitement. “Hm,” you make a thoughtful face. “I definitely don’t want you to ‘get lost’. I would like to try to become friends again. How does that sound?” The softness in your voice almost makes Shinso tear up. “Yeah, I’d love that.” Even with only the dim light from above Shinso can see you smile, and his heart skips a beat. Unable to contain himself from smiling, he quickly turns away.
“I have something else to tell you,” Shinso admits. He grabs is bag and rests it in his lap before opening it. Your curious eyes are watching his every move and cause Shinso’s hands to tremble a little as he pulls his capture weapon and mask out of the bag. “After the sports festival Mister Aizawa reached out to me,” he explains. “I’ll take an exam to determine if I’ll be allowed to switch to the hero course.” Shinso watches as your eyes widen. “We’ll become heroes together after all.”
“Oh Shinso!” You let out a joyful laugh. “That’s amazing! I’m so proud of you!” A warm feeling spreads through Shinso’s body at your words. He missed your laugh and now that he hears it, it is even more amazing and heart-warming than he remembered it to be. “Thank you.”
You sit there for a while until Shinso notices the time. “We should go back. I don’t want to get my ass beaten by Aizawa.” You agree and walk next to Shinso back to the dorms. The atmosphere is a lot lighter this time. Instead of keeping quiet, you talk about being heroes, about what both of you have been up to in the meantime, and about how you want to rebuild your relationship.
The dorms are in sight and you stop again. You hold out your hand and extent your pinkie. “Promise me to pass the exam? So that we can become heroes together?” Shinso does not need to think about that twice. He links his pinkie with yours, just like he did when you were kids. “I promise.”
#shinsou x reader#shinsou hitoshi x reader#shinsou x male reader#shinsou hitoshi x male reader#bnha x reader#bnha x male reader
280 notes
·
View notes