#and we’re like uhhhhh i don’t think it was me

[iguessitsjustme]

urm sorry i called you rel it was a typo! (rae my beloved)

You’re all good! I actually lowkey like Rel as a name. Its solid. If I hadn’t already decided to go by Rae here, I would like Rel lol. It’s much better than the last name someone accidentally called me which I can’t say without giving away my irl name alas. But just know I put up with being called this name on and off for about a year by my manager at a Dairy Queen I was working at. It was very much a “if I tell them I hate it, it will get worse” type of thing.

But Rel is good. I don’t mind being called Rel. I actually don’t really mind being called anything at all. As long as it’s not malicious, I do not care. I appreciate the apology for it though. But the typo made me laugh a whole lot. I hope you have a great day :)

[roylustang]

A mouse chewed my headphones 😭

[fingertipsmp3]

SOS two of my coworkers swapped shifts and now I’m worried tomorrow is going to be awkward and bad

[ludwigplayingthetrombone]

Finally finished the first part of gai’s 8 gates coma and how kakashi dealt with it rewrite people have been requesting. [tw blood, injury, coma, death discussions, grief]

Kurenai: Kakashi Kks: Ah. Kurenai and...baby, what’s up? Kurenai: You mind if I come in a moment? Kks: Uhhhhh I-

Kks: So what did you need to speak about? Did something happen? K: No, Nothing’s happened. You haven’t gotten to properly see and bond with her yet. Here Kks: You know I’m not fond of kids. K: That’s why I didn’t ask. Hold your arms out. Ok, now, don’t look absolutely petrified.

Kks: She’s ok, I guess [YELP] Oi! Don’t pinch me while I’m holding your baby! K: You wouldn’t drop her. Asuma would haunt you forever! Kks: Terrifying thought, Mirai.... How are you feeling? K: Exhausted. Do you really want to hear how horrifying having a baby is? Kks: No, please don’t tell me.

K: I came over to check on you as well. Any news? Kks: No. He’s still the same. K: Is that why it looks like this in here? Kks: ...Yeah. Doctor said he may never wake up. Since we’re eachother’s medical contacts, Tsunade told me I had to prepare to make hard decisions should it come to that.

Kks: With the council breathing down my neck over a job I don’t want, I had... A bit of an outburst. K: I don’t even blame you. That’s... That they expect you to carry on like normal. Still grieving. The person you love most is gone. But you’re still here. Don’t let them just dust you off and move on again. I’ll always have your back. Kks: You and Asuma always did. Even when I wasn’t grateful for it.

Kks: I can’t tell if they just don’t care or didn’t realize, Gai’s the one who held me together all these years. Only reason I’m still here at all is because of him. I don’t think tenzou, the elders, or the village are prepared for what’ll become of me if I lose him. So, I don’t care anymore. Let them be mad. I won’t give up on him. K: You should talk to him. Kks: huh K: Talk about anything! I’m sure the sound of your voice will help him find his way back. Especially if you sound sad, Kks: uuh

K: I can hear it now, “My eternal rival is sad? Not on my watch!“ Kks: Pretty accurate impression. K: There’s been lots of source material! Kks: Maaa, Your mom’s a huge dork K: Oi! [kakashi chuckles]

K: He’ll be so upset he missed her birth Kks: Oh, devastated. I can’t wait to see the look on Gai’s face, Mirai, when I tell him /I/ held you first! When he wakes up

Kks: Hey, Gai. Kurenai said i should talk to you.

Kks: Feels weird. Most of the people I’m used to talking to like this are all... Dead.

It’s so eerie how silent you’ve been for so long. you’re not even this quiet when you sleep. Your kids come everyday to see you. Naruto and sakura when they can. Lots of others. I’ve been telling them embarrassing  stories from when we were kids since you keep making them wait. Do you remember when I came over while you and Dai were making supper

Dai: Kakashi! Good to see you, my boy! Kks: Id Gai home? Dai: He’s helping with supper! Go on, inside, you’re always welcome! Kks: Ok Dai: Atta boy Kks: Hey, G- !? ummm? Gai: OH!! Rival!! Kks:  Is that a lid?! Gai: Correct!! It stops me from crying while cutting onions! A win for me!!

Kks: Against.... the onions? Gai: Yep! KKs:[snicker] Gai: Laugh all you want! Not everyone can comprehend innovation. Kks: Whatever. You forgot this at the training grounds. I know it’s yours there’s a turtle on it. Gai: See! You’re already tearing up! Kks: Am not Gai: Also, thankyou so much! Kks: Bye, I’m leaving. Gai: Could it be? You’re scared I can cut much faster than you! Kks: I am not scared. Gai: Good, I think we have another lid! Kks: YOU-!

Dai: Great to see growing boys with such a hunger! I’ll never have to prep onions again! Kks: I think about that everytime I chop onions now. You’ve altered my brain with all the ridiculous things you’ve done. Can’t even look at the toys you’ve gotten the dogs without getting emotional

Kks: Just knowing you’re here still, I can barely function. It’s pretty pathetic... Your hair’s getting long. Turning into your dad.

[gai’s heartbeat] Kks: Gai

[gais heartbeat continues]

[gai’s heartbeat continues] Kks: If anything should happen to me, you’ll rush over, right? Gai: Damn right, I will. Dont you worry about that.

[Gai’s heartbeat]

Kks: I miss you

[miniwheat77]

Sizes. (141+Alejandro x Reader.)

!NSFW, gang bang, rough sex, double penetration, pretty much porn without plot, read at your own risk. Minors DNI!

A laugh leaves your lips as Gaz jokes with you. He’s been chatting you up for a while. A mission went a little south, everyone had been battered and bruised but everyone made it out alive. Which is the important part.

Price decided to let everyone have a couple days to themselves to heal and feel better, which meant everyone gathered up every bit of alcohol they could find and met in the lunch room to drink.

It had been a few hours and everyone was drunk. Glossy eyes, red cheeks. Lazy smiles. Everyone talked and laughed together. You and Gaz were listening in on a conversation Soap and Ghost were having, a debate. On which of them had the biggest dick.

You sent Gaz an awkward laugh. “What the hell are you two on about?” He interrupts their conversation. “We’re talking about who has the biggest dick. I think it’s me.” Soap crosses his arms. Gaz smirks. “Mmm. I think you’re wrong. I think it’s me.”

By now, everyone’s attention had been grasped. “Let’s make a bet then. Who has the biggest dick?”

“Yeah, but how are we going to know?”

"Uhhhhh. Y/N! Y/N can be the middle man, ah? How does that sound?" Soap says. “Um. Excuse me?” You laugh. Looking up from your drink.

"We wanna know who has the biggest dick between all of us." Your eyes widen. "Yeah. Me too.” Price says, walking toward the table. “Christ in heaven, you’re all just a bunch of teenage boys in adult male bodies.” You cover your face. “Come on Y/N. Help us out.” You roll your eyes. “Fine.”

------

"Alright. So.. In order. I don't know, do you want details?" You ask. "Sure." Alejandro asks.

"Alright, Ghost won by a landslide. I'm just gonna say that now. As for the rest of you. Soap and Price have almost the exact same size, Price has a little more girth on Soap, but other than that.. Alejandro and Gaz are pretty close too, but where they lack in girth they pick up in length so. I don't know. All of you are 6 inches and above."

"Soft?" Gaz asks.

"There's a woman playing with our dicks, Gaz. Full confidence I'm above 6 with a semi." Soap laughs. You roll your eyes. "Anything else you need me for? Or can I go wash my eyes out with bleach?” You laugh. All eyes are on you, a break of awkward silence. “I’m gonna take that as a no.” You laugh awkwardly, pushing passed Soap.

"Wait." Soap grasps hold of your arm. "Need ya for one more thing." He smiles, pulling you back. Each of them moving toward you, forming a circle around you. "Uh.. What is going on?" You ask. "Trying to give you a couple more sins to wash off, señiorita." Alejandro smiles. "What?" You look completely confused.

Soap pulls you into him, breathing up against your ear. "We already know what we need to know. Just want to know, which of us can make you cum the hardest.” He breathes. “I-I” you blush. “Shhh. Relax sweetheart.” He chuckles. “You’re so tense.” He breathes out, nose brushing up against you cheek. “I.. I don’t think I understand.” You breath. He pushes you back up against the table behind you, lifting you up onto it. “We’ve talked about it. A lot.” Alejandro smiles, brushing his hand up your thigh. Soap still has his hands on you. They’re all staring at you like a pack of wolves, ready to devour their prey. “I just don’t think this is a good idea,” you try to stand up but Soap pushes you back. “Relax. Nothing to be nervous about.”

“Here.” Price passes you a cup. It’s full of some kind of liquor. “It’ll help.”

Your chest raises and falls, nervousness settling into your chest. All of their eyes are on you. You stare between the cup of liquor and them. This was their way of asking for consent. If you take the cup, they’re going to ruin you.

Who are you to ruin their fun?

You take it from his hand and tip back the entire cup of liquor in a few huge gulps, flinching. Each of them getting an evil grin on their lips.

Soap helps you undress, grasping the hem of your shirt and raising it up over your head. He watches the way you start to relax into his touch, the liquor you had helping ease up your nervousness. “Lay back.” He mumbles, you obey immediately, something he takes a liking to right away. He grasps your pants, unbuttoning them and pulling them down your legs, panties going down along with them. You’re completely exposed to them, and you can hear their bodies moving around, belts coming off, clothing moving against clothing as they undress themselves around you.

“Gonna ruin you, Cariño.” Alejandro mumbles, he’d moved around the other side of the table, his face near your head.

Gaz stood to your left, still undressing himself. Ghost to your right, Soap between your legs. The only person you didn’t see was Captain Price, maybe he’d changed his mind. Soap slides into you unexpectedly and a gasp leaves your lips, but gets muffled as Alejandro slides himself into your mouth. You moan around his shaft as Soap starts to hammer his hips into yours. You swallow him up, he groans at the tightness he feels around him. Gaz moves toward you, lifting up your hand to place it on his cock. Ghost doing the same to your other side.

For a few minutes, the only thing you hear are moans and groans, coming from each of them. They’re so touch starved that even just small brushes against you have them groaning out. Ghosts head is tipped back as you move your hand fast against him, he’s holding his shirt up over his stomach, watching the way you pleased him. Gaz is doing the same on your other side. “Fuckin hell.” Soap gasps, holding your thighs up as he fucked his himself into you. “You’re dripping around me sweetheart. So perfect.” He gasps, rubbing the pad of his thumb over your clit as you squirmed around him.

Alejandro is still fucking himself into your mouth, you’re sucking back as hard as you can and his thighs are shaking, trying desperately to hold himself together. “Little slut is good at this ah?” He smirks. Hand moving down to cup your breast, giving it a small squeeze. “Getting me close already, you want me to fill this mouth?” He breathes. You moan around him and he smiles, gripping into the table. You could feel the table shaking violently underneath you at Soap’s hard thrusts. He’s fucking into you steadily, and you can feel your first orgasm growing in the pit of your stomach. You’re wrapped so tight around Soap, pulling him closer to the edge with each thrust he took. “Shit..” he moans out, eyes screwing shut. Alejandro is holding a death grip on your hair, holding your head steady as he fucks your throat. The back of your throat would surely be bruised from his assault, but the only thing you could seem to think about was Soap, pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

You’re balancing on a tight rope, and right as you’re about to fall off, Soap moans out, sliding out of you and pumping his cock. Watching you be used like this has him about to cum already. He pumps his hand up his cock quickly, groaning out loud as he finishes up your stomach and chest. You’re whimpering around Alejandro, at the emptiness you feel. Desperate to feel it again.

Gaz is quick to swap him places, sliding himself into your tight hole. You moan around Alejandro again, eyes rolling back as Gaz bottoms out immediately, hips snapping into yours. Soap leans down to latch his mouth onto one of your nipples. Alejandro’s hips halt and he holds you down on him, your skin turning red as your air was cut off. He finishes down your throat, cock throbbing hard and you swallow it down quickly. He’s loud when he cums, holding your head still as he abuses your throat. A gasp leaves your lips as he pulls out of your mouth.

You’re panting, taking in breaths like the air is limited. He leans down, looking down to see Gaz fucking you. You’ve still got a tight grip on Ghosts dick, pumping him hard and fast as you’re getting filled. You try not to move too quickly, keeping your hand at a steady pace, Ghost can’t help but admire how you pace yourself even under this amount of pressure. He smiles down at you. “Fuck she’s tight.” Gaz laughs. Tilting his head back. “Yeah she is.” Soap whimpers, smiling against your skin. His lips have attacked you, leaving love bites all over your chest, sucking at your nipple until you squirm. Alejandro is still watching Gaz fuck into you, lips near your ear as he mumbles into your ear. How good of a girl you are, letting them fuck you like this. Use you like the toy you are.

“I’m gonna cum!” You cry out, and they smile at your sudden outburst. Soap leans down, rubbing his fingers fast over your sensitive nub until you’re crying out, orgasm hitting you like a massive tidal wave. A cry leaves your lips, drawing laughs out of each of them. “That’s it. Milk my fucking cock like that. Throbbing so hard around me.” Gaz gasps. Ghost swaps Alejandro, sliding his dick into your mouth. You were nervous for when he was going to fuck you. He was massive and he’d stretch you more than anyone else. Your lips were being stretched, you could feel them stretching around the sheer size of him. He fucks himself into your throat and keeps you focused on him. Ghost plays with your other breast, Soap still assaulting your other with his lips. He pinches your nipple hard, pulling a cry from your lips, smiling as it gets muffled around him. “Such a good girl.”

Your hand is working up Soap and Alejandro’s shafts, moving at a steady pace. They’re both so sensitive but enjoying the overstimulation from you. You’re covered in cum and lube, hands had been drenched at some point. Their cocks were slick with it as you pumped them fast, squeezing with the perfect amount of tightness. Dog tags and belts rattled throughout the room. Dangling in front of you. The light was bright, dizzy from being drunk, eyes watery and blurry from being fucked so good.

Gaz slides out of you, hand working the same as Soap had, until he finishes on your chest with a groan. Letting himself go. He backs away and disappears from the table, but you don’t notice. Ghost still filling your mouth full, pushing you to your limits. Alejandro is next, hands gliding up your thighs. Your pussy is blushing from getting fucked, throbbing and dripping and he smiles, grasping his cock in his hand. He lines himself up with your entrance, tip pushing your folds apart as he slides in. “Fuck.. she is tight.” He growls. Saving no time to fuck himself into you. He holds your thighs with his arms, squeezing them maybe a little too hard as he pounds into you. You moan around Ghost, hand still stroking Soap. “Fucking hell you are sweet.” Ghost groans. “So fucking.. perfect, such a filthy mess.” He gasps out.

Alejandro feels a little pathetic. Maybe it’s how sensitive you’ve made him, but his high is approaching quickly. He tries to slow his hips, your free hand clutches the table in a death grip, and your hips lurch into Alejandro. “Gonna cum again sweetheart?” He smirks. Ghost keeps your mouth full, but your body shakes violently as Alejandro fucks you. “Fuck.. your tightening around me has me so close.” Alejandro groans out, pulling out of you, and just like the others, finishing on your chest, groaning out, hand getting covered in his own cum. Ghost slides himself from your mouth, Soap switching him places. You hear his heavy footsteps moving to your feet and you pant heavily. Your raise yourself up onto your elbows, watching him pump his cock, moving to your entrance. “Shhh. Relax.” Soap mumbles into your ear. “You can take it sweetheart. Promise.” He kisses your cheek, kissing your jawline and down your neck, sucking and biting at the skin there.

You feel the tip of ghosts cock start to stretch you and you gasp out, a cry leaving your lips. “Ah, I can’t- I can’t take it!” You cry. “Shhh.. Relax.” Soap tries to soothe you, running his hand over your hair. “You can. You can take it, and you will. Just relax.”

Ghost pushes deeper and you lay flat on the table, clutching at the sides. Tears filling your eyes as he filled you. You were fucked out and overstimulated. There wasn’t an inch of your body that wasn’t covered in sweat or cum. Your hair was damp with sweat, face beat red.

Soap could see the small blood vessels broken in your cheeks, little red spider lines covering them. Lips were split and slightly bloodied from being stretched. You were covered in love bites from him, all over your neck and chest. It was a sight for sore eyes. When Ghost bottoms out, he tears a cry from your throat, tears streaming steadily down your cheeks. “Yeah that’s a good girl, take him.” Soap mumbles into your ear. “Watch sweetheart.” He helps you prop yourself back up. “Watch him fuck you.” Soap reaches down across your chest, fingers pressing against your clit. You rest yourself against Soap’s chest.

You’re unsure where Gaz and Alejandro have gone, probably to clean up and call it a night. You still seen no sign of Captain Price.

Soap rubs fast circles against your clit, Ghost hammering his hips into yours. “Such a pretty girl sweetheart.” Soap whispers into your ear, reassuring you and egging you on to take it further.

“So fucking tight.” Ghost groans out. Voice deep as he does. Your eyes stare down to where Ghosts massive cock disappears into you and you’re silent, body shaking each time he thrusts his hips into you. You’re right on the edge again and he can feel it by the way your pussy clenches tight around him, milking his cock. His eyes stare into yours, and you watch him stare at you, you can tell there’s an evil smile on his lips by the way his eyes are. “Those are some dangerous looks you’re giving me, princess.” Ghost laughs. “Looks like you wanna devour me.” You don’t say anything, don’t even move. Your eyes fixated on him as he pushes you closer and closer to your orgasm. Soap draws his hand back, but you stop him. “Damn.” He laughs nervously. “She’s really into this. Look at her.” Ghost chuckles. Your eyes screw shut. “Goddamn!” He yelps, eyes widening. You reach another orgasm, tightening and throbbing around Ghost. A mewl leaves your lips and Ghosts eyes roll back. Once he’s ridden our your high, you’re squirming from Soap rubbing at your clit. “Gotta stop, she’s gonna make me cum already.”

“Captain, you ready?” Soap pulls his hand away from you, and you whimper at the loss, Soap smiling. He returns himself, seeing Price tip back the rest of his whiskey, putting out his cigar.

He starts to undress himself and Soap returns his hand, rubbing fast circles on your clit again. “Can feel you throbbing around me. Gonna cum again, already?” Ghost looks down at you. You nod your head, cheeks still stained with tears. Your eyes roll back, resting your head on Soaps chest since he was bent down near you. “That’s it. That’s a good girl.” Soap smiles. A gasp leaves your lips and you take in another breath.

Ghost slides out of you after he’s ridden out your second orgasm, looking forward to the way you’ll have a 3rd around him. “Lay on your stomach.” Ghost says, grasping your arm. You do it immediately.

Soap passes Ghost the bottle of lube they’d gotten for this. He squeezes the bottle, getting maybe a little too much on his hand as he circles his finger over your puckering hole. “Relax.” Ghost says. You take a deep breath, looking to the side as he slides his finger into you. It’s an unfamiliar feeling, you hadn’t felt it before. You moan out as he draws his finger back, adding a second. You gasp out, clutching the table. “Oh fuck!” You cry out. He gives you a few minutes to adjust.

“She’s ready, Captain.”

You hear heavy footsteps coming your way. “Can you stand sweetheart?” Price asks. Pulling you off of the table. Your knees buckle underneath you, and he laughs. He lifts you up, walking along with you until he reaches the chair in the corner of the room. Ghost sits down and Price helps you sit down onto him, straddling his hips, and he helps guide you back into him, a whimper leaving your lips. “I can’t take it-“ you shiver. “You can sweetheart.” Price smiles, slicking his cock up with lube. He’s standing behind you, Ghost is fucking his hips up into yours. “Just a little more sweetheart.” He reassured you, running his fingertips across your back to soothe you.

He presses his tip against your hole, your ass stretching out around him. Your body tremors as he pushes into you, crying out. When you finally feel his skin against your back, he’d slid in all of the way, your lips are parted, eyes glossed over. You’re in a different world of pleasure.

Ghost filling your pussy, Price filling your ass. You lift up on Ghost, testing the waters. Price slides back out of you, adding more Lube to slide easier.

You can’t focus. Can’t think straight. You’re panting, your skin is beat red. Your face is flushed and you can’t stop blushing. You straddle Ghosts hips and lower yourself onto him once again, feeling him stretch you out. “Fuckin’ hell you’re a minx.” Price breathes out from behind you, a gasp leaving your lips as you feel his cock brushing against your back. Ghost adjusts himself on the chair and you feel Price lining up with your ass again, leaning into the chair from behind you. You felt him slide into you, stretching you even further. The fullness you felt had your eyes watering. It hurt just a little bit as he stretched you out but the burn and feeling of fullness numbed you.

You were fucked out already, unsure of how you could push your body to such limitations. You wanted them to use you just as they were, wanted to be a toy for them to use as they please. As they both began to thrust into you, you couldn’t keep quiet. Strings of moans and pleas left your lips like a poem. Price lifts your chin, forcing you to look at him. “You’ll be a good girl, yeah?” He bites his bottom lip. “Yes s-sir.” You can barely get it out. “That’s it.” He smirks. Ghost grasps a handful of your hair, pulling you up, his warm breath against your ear. “You’re our toy, ours to use and fuck as we please.” He growls. The way they stretched you, pushing against each part of you that you never knew could feel so good. “Just one more time sweetheart. Cum for us one more time.” Price mumbles.

“I can’t-“ you cry. “It’s too much!”

A deep chuckle comes from Price’s mouth. “You can sweetheart. Just one more.” He mumbles against your ear, moaning at the way you tightened around him. “Such a good girl, letting us fuck you like this. We’re going to give it to you sweetheart, gonna make you cum so hard.” Price mumbles into your ear. Ghost has his head tilted back, resting on the couch. Hands on your thighs. Price has a tight grip on your hips. Steady thrusts into you as ghosts thrusts up into you. The both of them overstimulating you. “So tight around me again. You’re close hm?” Ghost runs a hand through your hair. “Cum on my cock, you can do it.”

A sob tears it’s way out of your throat when you reach another orgasm, body shaking violently when you do. Your knees give out, but Ghost holds you up, still fucking himself into you. You’re crying, tears streaming from your eyes again. Body shaking with sobs, so overstimulated you felt like you were going to explode. “S’okay sweetheart. Do you want us to stop?” Price moves your hair from your faces. “No-“ you cry. Price smiles. “Such a good girl.” He mumbles, hips still hammering into yours. “We’re gonna fill you full sweetheart. Gonna fill this tight ass.” Price groans out. “Fuck- fuck I’m going to cum.” Ghost groans out. Hips thrusting up into you harder and faster, holding you up since you were too weak. When he finally cums, he moans out. You expected him to pull out but he doesn’t. He lowers you onto him, letting you rest your legs onto the couch as his cock throbs with each spurt of his cum that fills you until you’re dripping back out around his thick cock. The groan he lets out is sexy, your eyes rolling back as you hear it.

Price tilts his head back, cock twitching inside of you as he reaches his high too. Throbbing hard as he finishes, his cum doing the same. Spilling back out of you as he cums. He gives you a minute before he slides out of you, watching his cum spill back out of you. Ghost lifts you off of him.

Price buttons his pants back up, lifting you up so that Ghost can clean himself up.

Price carries you back into your room. Your skin is flushed and abused. Pussy throbbing. You have bruises on your thighs and hips from their hands on you. Lips split and swollen. A sight for sore eyes. “Did such a good job for us dove.” Price mumbles.

“Such a good job.”

[hunterofartemis7]

Pt.11

*at the police station*

Bruce: do I even want to know how you ALL got arrested?

Jason: we have a very good reason!

Bruce: oh I’d love to hear it

Jason: a doctor was very rude to raven and made her cry

Tim: and he had so many complaints from different female staff and female patients so we took matters into our own hands

Bruce:…yeah that’s a good reason. *pays their bail*

Cop: *lets them all out*

Dick: btw, where are the birds at?

Bruce: outside with Kori and Selena

Jason: cat moms here?

Bruce: yes

Jason:….put me back in the cell

*outside*

Raven: I didn’t think they would get arrested

Damian: I did

Selina: I mean, they had a good reason.

Kori: you think the doctor will sue them?

Selina: he can try, but Bruce had better lawyers

Raven: how much was their bail?

Selina: probably a couple hundred a piece. Why?

Raven: cause I need to know how much to pay Bruce back for

Bruce: *coming out of the jail* you’re not paying me back for anything Raven.

Raven: but they got arrested because of me…

Jason: no we got arrested because no one fucks with our family.

Raven:..thank you, for sticking up for me

Dick: anytime Rae.

Bruce: so what exactly did he do to make you cry and make them THAT angry?

Jason: uhhhhh…..

Raven:…..

Tim: *gives her the “we say nothing if you don’t want us to” look*

Selina: well??

Raven: *mumbles* he..was saying awful things about me..and my baby..

Selina: BABY!?!?

Bruce: your pregnant?

Raven: *nods* I..I’m sorry I didn’t tell y—*gets tackled by Selina*

Selina: CONGRATULATIONS!!!! MY WORDS IM GONNA BE A GRANDMA! 🥹

Bruce: *hugs her as well* congratulations my dear! I’m so happy for you! *turns to Damian and hugs him* congratulations son

Damian: thank you father

Jason: B this is your first grandchild

Bruce: I know.🥹

Dick: so we’re celebrating now..okay. *takes a breath* IM GONNA BE AN UNCLE!!! *bear hugs Damian*

Damian: UNHAND ME GRAYSON!

Jason: I’m really happy for you two but also…*punches Damian in the arm* WHAT THE HELL MAN?!

Damian: what was that for!?

Jason: uh maybe for not telling us sooner!! Our baby brother is having a baby and you didn’t tell us immediately! How long have you known!?

Raven: little over a week…

Jason: REALLY!?

Damian: we were going to tell you!

Tim: when?

Damian: in like…3 months

Selina: THREE MONTHS!?

Kori: guys, stop yelling

Jason: give me one good reason why!?

Kori: *motions to raven who’s tearing up*

Raven: I’m sorry…😣

Jason: Rae…no no sweetheart it’s okay, don’t apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong

Raven:😖😭 *hormones suck*

Damian: way to go asshole *hugs raven close, rubbing her back*

Dick: Rae were not actually mad, we’re just giving Damian shit.

Tim: yeah we didn’t mean to make you upset.

Jason: *looks at Kori like “this will be a long few months”*

Kori:😑

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Dollhouse 2

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as fear, coercion, violence, noncon/dubcon, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk. 

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you. 

Summary: Five girls move into a shared residence for the upcoming school year but not all is as it seems. 

Characters: Jonathan Pine, Captain Syverson, Steve Abnesti, Lloyd Hansen, and Peter Parker 

This fic features five named readers; Ann, Lulu, Polly, Barbie, and Molly. This chapter features Ann and Lulu. Please note that characters may switch but will maintain second-person POV.

Note: It's thirstday.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. Thanks to everyone who reads this one and thank you for all your energy.<3 

Love you all until you can’t stand it. Take care. 💖 

You’ve been waiting all summer to come back. Campus is like paradise to you. Sure, it’s fun to party but there’s also all the clubs and the general sense of community. You always manage to find your way right into the heart of it all. 

You’re a bit disappointed to not be living on campus itself but you found an alternative not too far away, and in a nice neighbourhood too. Not to mention, your best friend ever, Polly, will be living with you! 

The uber pulls up to the front of the idyllic building and your cheeks bloom with excitement. You spent the extra money to haul all your bags from the station, and it was worth it. You couldn’t have dragged it all that way, even on the bus. 

The driver helps you get everything onto the curb. You thank him and tip him on the app. He looks at you with that fogginess that a lot of guys get. He asks if you need anything else and you assure him you’re just fine. He seems almost reluctant to go. His spindly fingers twiddle at his side as he slinks around the hood. 

You stand with your bags and take out your phone. Polly said she was on her way. You don’t want to go in without her. You send her a message asking how close she is.

“Hey, what’re ya standing in the middle of the sidewalk for, bitch?”  

You wince as you spin to face the grizzly snarl. You harrumph and scowl at Polly as she cackles. It’s funny to think she could do such a scary voice considering she always looks so dainty and perfect. Even then, she wears a blouse and skirt, with a scarf that reminds you of an Audrey classic. Never a stitch out of place with her. 

“You sure are dressed for moving day,” you remark dryly. 

“Mm, don’t talk to me Barbie Doll,” she tosses the derisive nickname at you, “I see you have on the classic Mattel shade today.” 

You pout your pinkened lips at her and roll your eyes, “whatever! Pol! We’re gonna be roommates!” 

You squeal together and she lifts her bag over the lip of the pavement, “hell yeah.” 

You giggle and look up at the house. You went there once before for the walkthrough and it’s even more perfect than you remember. You bend to take your smallest bag and Polly shakes her head. 

“Really? You brought all that? I hope you don’t think I’m gonna be your personal camel and carry it.” 

“Don’t be such a downer,” you stick your tongue out. 

“Excuse me,” a deep timbre rolls over as the front gate squeaks. You and Polly share a startled look then turn to the large blond man as he steps through. That isn’t Jonathan... “Are you girls here for moving day?” 

“Uhhhhh,” you drone out and once more glance at your BFF, “we are.” 

“Oh, let me explain, Jonathan can’t make it. He has an emergency at another property. He left your keys with me to deliver,” he stirs around in the pocket of his blazers as he stands across the pavement. 

He's taller than the building manager you met in July, broader too. He’s bigger in every way and just as blond. He wears a pair of square glasses and only a plain tee under his suit jacket. He fishes out two key rings and shakes them. 

“Here we are,” he grins. He steps forward and offers you one of the fobs. “Front door is a censor. All new system.” He gives Polly the other dongle. “By the way, I’m Steve. I help Jonathan with security. I’ll be popping in for routine measures but I shouldn’t bother you too much.” 

“Oh thanks. I’m Barbie, this is Polly,” you squeeze the fob and smile at the grand facade of the building. “Awesome.” 

Polly toys with her keyring and stays quiet. She’s usually a riot but around men, you’ve noticed she gets a bit shy. You don’t blame her. Steve is a big guy and his gaze doesn’t falter for a single second. 

“Well, that’s great,” you continue, “good to be safe.” 

“Yeah, especially with a house full of girls. You never know,” he says. 

You blink at the subtlety of his suggestion. Obviously, there’s always those who will have the worst intentions but you try not to think of that. Besides, you’ve been around the block and it all looks very ordinary to you. 

“Anyway, let me show you inside. You’ve already got a roommate waiting on your girls,” he announces and claps his hands. “Can I help you with some of this?” 

He nods to your bags and you shimmy as you laugh at yourself, “oh, yeah, aha. I wanted to make sure I had everything.” 

“No problem, think I can handle it,” he bends and picks up your two largest bags. He doesn’t struggle at all. You gather up the three smaller ones and Polly rolls her suitcase with her. 

He stands inside the gate as he waits for you to enter. You lead the way up the walk as Polly clicks behind you. You climb the steps and strut across the porch. 

“Go on in,” Steve calls from behind. 

You do as he says and set your bags to the side of the entryway. You pause to take off your shoes as you see another pair on the mat. A pair of round-toed flats with bows. 

“You two are upstairs,” Steve says, “at the top, rooms at the end of the hall. Do you want me to bring your bags up?” 

“Oh, no, you can leave them at the door,” you face him again. “This is so lovely. Will you let Jonathan know we got here or should I call him?” 

“I can take care of it,” he says. “I’ll be headed to him once the rest of you show up. My partner’s out of town so we’re short right now.” 

“Your partner?” 

“Like I said, security.” 

“Ah, right, ha,” you rock your shoulders and he puts your bags down lightly. 

“Sure you don’t want some help,” he peers upstairs. 

“Really, we’re all good, right Polly?” 

“Mhmm,” she nods and looks past him. 

“Right, I’ll be outside. There's three more coming.” He nods and turns to go. 

You wait until he’s out the door to proceed upstairs. As you do, Polly sighs. 

“He was nice,” you say. 

“I guess,” she agrees dully. 

“He’s just doing his job.” 

“I know, it’s just, boys, guys, or whatever, standing next to you with them is like being invisible sometimes,” she mutters. “Not your fault but... yeah.” 

“Whatever. He’s a bit old for me,” you scoff as you get to the second-floor hall. You forgot how wide it was. Probably a good thing knowing it will be a full house. 

As you come to the end of the hall, a door opens and you see a single eye peer out. You stop short and Polly hits your back. The girl shifts the door and sticks her head out. 

“Uh, hi,” she squeaks, “I’m Lulu.” 

“Hey, uh, we’re... Barbie,” you point to yourself, “and Polly.” 

Polly leans around to wave with her free hands, “hi, Lulu.” 

Lulu lets the door go and steps out, “it’s been so quiet around here. I got here last week. It’s so nice to have people around.” 

“Oh, really?” You wonder. 

“I’m on exchange so... yeah, had to fly in,” she smiles sheepishly. “Anyway, sorry to bug you. Just wanted to say hi.” 

“You’re not bugging us at all! We were just chatting with Steve--” 

“Steve?” She frowns, “oh, the big bald guy? That’s Sy.” 

You frown and look at Polly, “no, Steve. Blond hair. Big.” You make yourself wide as you say the last word. 

“Ohhhh, sorry, I haven’t been out of my room. I’ve been so nervous,” she giggles and it sounds like a tinkling bell. 

“He’s the security guy or something,” Polly says. 

“Right,” Lulu’s lips tremble, “cool. Um, anyway, if you need me to show you around...” 

“Um, sure. We’ll drop out things off then I want to have a look at the kitchen. I was thinking of having some drinks once the rest got here. Maybe we can do a housewarming,” you chirp. 

“Oh, that sounds fun,” Lulu laughs again and it seems to clog her throat. She clears it and blinks, “sorry. Nervous.” 

You smile. You like meeting new people and the most exciting part for you, is all the different personalities coming together. And there’s still three more girls on the way. 

New things are always scary. For you, even the familiar is frightening. Sometimes what you know is the most dangerous. Like the bullies you went to school with for years.

Transferring to a new college is enough stress on its own but moving to a whole new city, that’s another beast on its own. Just like a dragon on its hoard. You clutch your worn novel to your chest as you walk down the street, your bag bouncing on the cracks in the sidewalk. 

You should’ve written this down. You think you’re going in the right direction. After the greyhound, you counter the city transit into the core and from there, you’ve been walking in circles. Finally, you recognise a street name and stop to turn on your data and spend a few MBs on confirming your destination. Just at the end. Phew. 

That gate was in the photos, those hedges too. Wow, it looks so much better IRL. You slow down in disbelief as you stare up at the siding. This can’t be. For the price you’re paying, you have to have taken a wrong turn. 

“Moving in?” A chipper voice asks as a shadow skews over the pavement next to yours. 

You blanch and look over at a boy about your age with reddish brown hair and warm amber eyes. He grins as you lower your chin then turn back to the house, “uh, yeah?” 

“Me too,” he says. “Peter. It’s a pretty cool building, huh? My aunt knows the owner.” 

“Mr. Pine,” you murmur. 

“I call him Jonathan but, yeah,” he chuckles. “You’re a Thrones fan?” 

You furrow your brow and glance over again. Then you check the book in your hand. 

“I’ve only read the books,” you say. 

“Ah, I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.” 

“Molly,” you answer and sniff. You stare up at the house as it sinks in. You’ll be sharing a space with him. Not only him, but four others. 

“Should we go in together?” He offers. 

“Sure, why not,” you clutch your phone against the book and drag your bag forward. “Um, Mr. Pine said we should call--” 

“Yeah, that’s whatever. Like I said, I know him,” he insists as he goes ahead of you and unlatches the gate. “Come on.” 

You come forward as he hitches up his duffle bag. Your suitcase rattles over the threshold as another figure appears from the porch, “Pete, didn’t say you were bringing your girlfriend.” 

A large blond man, built like a warrior in a fantasy novel, descends the steps, “don’t think the roommates will be very happy about that.” “Whatever, Steve. She’s one of them. We just met.” 

“Ah, another one,” the man says, “great, just one more then.” The man digs in his pocket, “Jonathan left the keys.” He takes out two fobs and doles them out between you and Peter, “I’m Steve. Security.” He explains. 

“Oh, uh, nice to meet you,” you eke out. 

“This is Molly,” Peter intones and you give a bashful look. Oops, you forgot that. 

“Right, you two are on the first floor,” Steve says, “you wanna show her around, Pete?” 

Peter clucks, “Peter,” he corrects, “Steven.” 

The large man chortles and nods at you, “let me know if he gives you any trouble. It is my job to deal with the rabble.” 

You smile tightly and Peter waves off the other man, “come on. I’m sure you don’t wanna stand out in the sun with this lump head.” 

You show your teeth apologetically before you follow Peter. He strides down the walk and up the steps. You’re a few feet behind him. 

As you enter the house, you hear voices. They hush and you listen for them as they seem to do the same. Peter stands on the mat as you unlace your sneakers. 

“Hello?” He calls out, “anybody here?” 

There’s some noise before footsteps come from somewhere deep in the house. You look up to the top of the stairs as a figure appears above. The girl bounds down as two others loom behind her. 

“Helloooooo!” She trills, “I’m Barbie!” 

“Barbie,” Peter says, “hey. I love your lipstick.” 

“It’s gloss, actually, honey,” she winks, “you two are moving in? You’re friends too?” 

“Oh, uh no,” you shake your head, “we just...” 

“Good timing,” Peter says, “Peter, Molly.” He points in tandem with his introductions. 

“So cute, Molly, well up there is Polly. That rhymes! Polly and Molly, and that’s Lulu,” she gestures up behind her as the girls wave, “think there’s only one room left.” 

“What are we thinking?” Peter asks. “Party tonight? Ice breakers?” 

“Something like that. Drinks?” Barbie suggests. 

“You’re my kinda girl, Barbs.” 

“Barbie, hon,” she chides with a wag of her finger, “anywho, I’ll let you two get cozy while we wait on the last one.” 

“I hope it’s a dude,” Peter mutters as he turns away.  

You smile at Barbie then follow him. You’re not sure where your room is but he seems to know exactly where he’s going. You wouldn’t mind a door to hide behind. 

[yorshie]

Pick Up The Phone

Bayverse x FemReader PART TWO

tags/summary: violence, torture, cussing, hurt reader, angst, uhhhhh symptoms of shock? (I'm not to the point where I am writing an outright relationship but the undertones are there)

Reader has a date go sideways and the turtles come to the rescue, but there's a difference between seeing violence on tv and seeing someone you care for commit it.

Set in 2023 (Turtles aged up)

Leo would have called this an 'I told you so moment’. 

You wished he was here, would have listened to his lecture on being more careful and not letting your guard down, if only for the fact that suffering through a powerpoint on ‘fifty ways today could go wrong’ would be happening on the way to the med bay, where hopefully Donnie would inform you that your arm was, in fact, not broken, and you were just being a little bit dramatic.

You deserved a few moments of dramatics at this point.

Your phone buzzed again, loud and angry in your hand, but you ignored it, knowing it wasn’t the number you wanted, needed. The screen was cracked, half the touchpad dead, and you weren’t even going to try to answer unless it was one of your friends. 

Your face felt hot, sticky, but it was your arm that gave you worry. It had settled into a prickly pain that felt like a coiled snake, skin feverish and swelling quickly to the point your long-sleeved shirt felt constricting. Thank god it was dark outside, not many people around, easier to hide the side of your body that felt like it had shattered when you went down the stairs.

You paused under a street lamp, looked left and right, behind. The coast was clear, you felt far enough away. Your right hand pressed, shaky, on the screen, and you cursed, your fingers catching on the cracks as you fought with the half dead technology to hit a number, any number, on your short list.

Finally, failing, letting out a rough hiss, you jammed the phone on its side against your chest and held the button for assist.

It dinged, and you tucked your chin, whispering, “Siri, call Leo.”

“Sorry. Did you say ‘Call Leo’?” The answer, loud, carrying, had a shiver break across your shoulders, a cramp starting in your neck as your body tried to compensate the weight of keeping one side stationary.

“Yes.” It came out angry, even quieter, but the phone heard, and you watched as the screen changed, for once not trying to hit the speaker button.

The damaged screen was hot against your face, and you cradled it against the right side, unconsciously moving away from the light as you caught the distant shadow of a figure moving towards you.

The voicemail beeped, and you felt your face fall, not bothering to listen to the whole automated message. You set the phone back on your chest, pressed firm on the half lit ‘hang up’ button, fought a sniffle as it didn’t work. 

You hissed out a breath again, pressed your forehead against the screen, and gritted out, “c'mon Leo, please- please, get your phone, please.”

---------------------------

“Hey, we on for movie night tonight?” Raph’s voice echoed throughout the lair as he hopped the turnstiles into the main room, depositing a pack of soda onto the common area table as he went.

“Don’t know,” Mikey’s voice floated from far above, and Raph ducked as his brother swooped down, the propulsion on his skateboard whining as he banked hard and jumped over a pipe. “Babycakes said something about having plans, told me and Donnie to not wait up.”

“Plans?” Raph frowned, cast his brother a look over his shoulder as he paused.

“Yea, Dee thinks it’s that guy we’re suppose to pretend to not know about.”

“Well, you’re doing an excellent job of that,” Raph sassed, already moving, knowing a lost cause when he saw one. He stuck his head into the lab, careful not to move past the neon tape marking the entrance. “Hey, Don? You hear from girlie tonight?”

“No, not recently, but that’s not surprising.” Done answered, popping up from a workbench and moving towards his brother. “I sent a couple messages to her earlier, but I think she muted her phone, hasn’t answered.”

Before Raph could comment, he heard Mikey’s voice again. “Yea, she hasn’t even responded to the epic battle of cat gifs today, and we’ve had that thing rollin’ since Tuesday.” 

Raph snorted, loudly, just to let Mikey know he was ridiculous, but Donnie hummed, brows shifting in confusion. “Hm, well… maybe Leo knows something.”

“Knows something about what?” Came the reply, the eldest stepping out from the dojo, swords clasped in his hand instead of strapped across his shell. 

Raph jerked his chin towards him, “You talk to princess today?”

Leo paused, looked from Raph to Donnie. “No, but my phone’s been up in my room. Usually if she wants to talk, she does it in person.” 

“Just go check your phone, numskull.” Raph gestured, and Leo scoffed, walking up the ramp to his room. 

Donnie was already returning to the lab, grabbing his phone where it sat on the main desk. He frowned at the screen, calling back over his shoulder to Raph. “Got a missed call from her, just now.” The phone buzzed again, lighting up slightly brighter in his face. “Aaand now a voicemail.”

Raph moved to Donnie’s shoulder, crowding up into his space, as Donnie flicked the device open and navigated to the phone app.

“Donnie?”

They both froze, twin shivers working across their shells and down their legs like ice water at the hissed voice.

“Donnie, please, please- I need help-.” 

It sounded like - like crying. 

Raph was suddenly alone, a Donnie shaped hole next to him, as the taller brother all but teleported to his main station and started typing furiously on one keyboard. 

Muffled, a harsher voice in the distance, and then your breath heaved out across the speaker, loud and uneven, the slap of footsteps echoing in the background. Raph could hear the next words from clear across the room. 

“I’m not going back with you, leave me alone!”

“Donnie! We got a problem!” Leo was back. Raph spared him a glance, feet cemented to the floor, and saw the flash of an Otterbox in his hand.

“She called you, too?” 

He saw Leo mouth the word too, before Donnie’s voicemail started up again, and he went silent, still.

It was that harsher voice again, this time clearer, closer. “Hey, c’mon, at least let me take you to the hospital-”

Raph felt something knock into him, saw Mikey shrug his shoulder out of the way, uncharacteristically solemn as he asked: “Donnie, where we goin, bro?”

A loud ringtone blared throughout the lab before Donnie could answer, and Raph all but ripped the seams on his pocket trying to get his phone out. He cut off the cheery jingle about sunshine, Donnie’s hissed “speaker, speaker” reminding him to hit the extra button instead of just screaming into the receiver:

“Princess!?”

“Raph?” And oh, the pain in his chest at that one word.

“Where are you, talk to me.” He felt crowded, Mikey against one shoulder, Leo at his back, but he fought the urge to shake them off.

“Who the fuck is Ra-”

“Your worst goddamn nightmare, if you don’t quit following me, asshat!” He could have kissed you for that, but that ball of ice in his gut solidified at the angry answer fired back:

Oh, so this is why you were guarding your pho-” The voice cut off, and they all heard the painful gasp that followed, your hiss audible.

“Donnie, work faster!” Leo all but shouted, but Donnie was already flying, grabbing gear as fast as he could. They scrambled out of the lab, Raph and Mikey racing for the dojo, hot on the others’ heels as they leaped the turnstiles and raced to see who would get out to the tunnels first.

----------------------------------

Your call with Raph got disconnected in the struggle, but at that point all the despair, all the pain, got balled up in the center of your chest and turned into rage. You had minutes, maybe fifteen at the most, before the calvary arrived, and the idiot currently trying to haul you back to the street by your good shoulder would be in for a world of hurt.

“Stop! I don’t want to go anywhere with you!”

He ignored you, still pulling you away from the alley, from the manhole cover you’d been trying to pry open.

“You aren’t thinking clearly, why the fuck are you trying to go down into the sewer?” 

“Let. Me. Go.” You stepped forward quickly, stomped his foot, jerked back just as fast. 

“Fuck, you little bitch-”

The manhole cover behind you rocketed off the ground, disappearing into the dark with a loud crash and you felt like laughing at the sheer relief, your arm suddenly free as the man grabbing you was unceremoniously jerked away.

He was emitting a high pitched whine, the sound disappearing the harder Raph squeezed.

That relief bubbled away at the sight of violence, big hands slowly squeezing. You looked up at his face, expecting murder, bracing for it.

Devastated by the look of hatred in its stead.

Someone's arms wrapped around you, Mikey, you distantly thought, but you pulled against the warm push of muscle. “Stop- stop him-”

“Back off, Raph,” Leo barked, and you shivered as Raph dropped the man with a thud.

A quick glance around made you realize that, while relief had been your first emotion, something much darker had a hold of the turtles.

Donnie took up your vision as Leo moved past, large hands cool as he took your face between them and together with Mikey tried to turn you away.

Craning your neck, you could just make out the hiss of steel being drawn as Leo stopped over the crumpled figure on the ground.

A fear wormed its way into your heart, beating louder and louder. “Wait, wait- stop. Leo! Stop!”

He pulled up short like a puppet on strings, and you curled your good arm across Mikey’s bicep, trying for just a little wiggle room. Donnie’s thumbs still tracking across the bad side of your face as you fought to keep your eyes open.

“I need-I need you guys to take me to the lair.” The words left in a rush, your tone almost panicked, desperate that they take the bait. “Please, Raph. Leo. Please, I need you all to take me to the lair.”

“She’s got a broken arm,” Donnie called, as if you hadn’t spoken. “The head wound seems superficial, but it’s a lot of blood.”

You swatted away his hands, kept your eyes over his shoulder, tip toeing, pulling against Mikey. “Leave him, its not worth -”

Wrong thing to say. Raph moved faster than you could think. The crunch of bone against pavement the only warning before a high pitch scream left the man still on the ground. 

The near growled whoops was darker than you had heard his voice before, but Leo only huffed a low chuckle that did nothing to ease your fears.

“Don, She’s nicked here,” Mikey’s murmur jerked you back, made you realize the calloused hands on you had moved. His grip had shifted, one arm across your chest, the other pulling at the hem of your shirt, thumb tucked into the crease of your hip.

Donnie’s finger moved to cover the broken skin, and you hissed, breath broken, babbling: “Stairs. Stairs- I fell down the stairs leaving-”

“Oh?” Leo’s voice reached you, and you cut yourself off, jaw snapping shut despite the fact that the tone wasn’t aimed at you. “I didn’t know you were called ‘stairs’. Nice to meet you.”

You couldn’t see what he did, but whatever it was pulled out a gargled whine. 

Your hand finally unlatched from Mikey’s wrist, grabbed a hold of Donnie’s arm, tightened until you knew your nails were digging in. “Donnie- Donatello! Listen!”

Hazel eyes snapped to your face, and you continued, desperate to establish contact. “You are better than this, you all are better than this. Call it, Dee. Get me to the Lair."

His eyes flickered, you felt hope. “I’m really tired, Dee. My arm hurts so bad, please.”

His mouth pulled up at one corner, as if he knew what you were doing, saw straight through to the panic. He straightened to his full height, and you let that relief blossom, felt the pain in your arm again as he turned.

He whispered something, low, to Leo, and you watched, helpless in Mikey’s grip, as they turned in unison to your failed date.

“If.” Leo lowered himself, and you saw the sway of the blade in his hand, saw the way the man seemed hypnotized by the threat. “You. Ever. So much as think ill of her, we will know. And we will find you.”

Mikey’s chest vibrated under you back as he chuckled, his lyrical tone causing you to shiver. “Look at the big man quiver. Fucked up the wrong tree, bro.”

You bit your tongue, hard, fighting the urge to try and hurry them, goad them into leaving faster, knowing it might snap whatever hold you had and they’d go back into torment mode.

You didn’t release your breath until you all were in the tunnel below, good arm coming up to wrap around Mikey’s neck as he shifted you, careful of your bad side, gait long and even as they ate up miles.

Finally, a good ten minutes in, and you finally raised your head from his neck to ask, “Is my arm really broken?”

Heard Donnie hum an affirmative, and lowered your nose back to tuck against the juncture of Mikey’s neck. “Just one break, in your forearm. I’m hypothesizing you stuck it out to break a fall?”

“I really did take a trip down the stairs,” it felt wrong to try to inject humor, but they were so silent except for the sound of their feet on the cement. You tried to fill the silence again. “He only pushed me against the wall, only tried to get my phone. If I’d been smarter-”

A heavy hand, finger curling under your chin, and you let him, met Raph’s gaze, “If you say ‘only’ one more time, I’m turnin’ round.”

You made a strangled nose, disappeared back into the safety of Mikey’s hold, felt his hand soothe the shiver that had started in your shoulders, down your spine.

Donnie kept the med bay sterile, bleach clean. The white tiled walls boxed you in as Mikey set you on the patient bed, gently removing the grip you had on his wrist so Donnie could take his place.

They filled the room til the space was fit to burst, and you felt the tension, drowned in it with every pass of the soft cloth Donnie rubbed across your face, every brush of your knee against his leg. You had no idea who was wound tighter, you or them.

Finally, when Donnie moved back and you blinked at the harsh light after minutes of keeping your eyes clenched tight, Leo sighed. A deep, chest rattling exhale of breath, and it was like those imaginary puppet strings were finally cut, and you slumped your good shoulder against the wall behind you.

You could almost see him open his mouth even though you were faced the opposite way, and belatedly remembered how you had looked forward to his powerpoint presentation earlier. A smile worked its way onto your face, a twisted thing, gone as soon as you felt the atmosphere shift again.

“The fuck you smilin’ about?” Raph. And you swallowed heavily, mind flickering back to big hands squeezing.

“Raph.” Leo’s reprimand was soft, different from the bark earlier. You suddenly wanted him to snap, wanted the anger. Wanted them to at least stay on one page so you had a hope of processing it.

You felt tears, now of all times, escape their ledge, start tracking down your face as Donnie moved to your arm. You stared at a point over his shell, where the wall met the ceiling, and held it.

“Ah, shit, princess. I didn’t mean to snap at you.” That big hand again, cupping your cheek, and without thinking you curled your face away, heartbeat painful, imagining the strain to squeeze the life out of a man with one grip.

His hand hung in the air, suspended, then dropped, and you tracked it all in slow motion. 

Donnie interrupted, “I’m gonna look at your ribs now, kay?”

You nodded woodenly, sucked in a breath at how cold his hands felt against broken skin.

“You’re gonna feel a little out of sorts for a bit,” he continued, and blessedly Raph moved away. For a heart stopping moment you thought he was leaving, but he only leaned back against the closed door. You tracked over him, then around the room, realized he had gone to the wall furthest from Leo.

Donnie pulled your attention again, “you’re likely already experiencing some shock symptoms-”

Donnie was almost always right, you realized, because at that moment you blurted out: “Thank you, for- coming to-” The words stuck, and the tears wouldn’t stop, and you could still see Raph’s hand hanging in the space next to you. Your arm burned, your ribs ached, but you needed to say it, needed them to know that-

“Hey, babycakes, it’s ok. It’s ok.” Mikey was on the bed behind you, legs sliding on either side of yours, holding you steady with a warm hand on your good hip, and you breathed in sharp, your shiver turning into full body quakes.

Donnie kept a hold of your bad arm, held it out, kept it steady as he continued to work on it, probing the break carefully.

Leo moved, silent, in between a long blink, grip on your calves soft as he dropped to his knees, caged you in between Mikey’s thighs and his plastron.

Raph sighed from where he stood, and you heard more than saw him push off the door, steps loud as he moved to your free side and once again raised his hands.

They curled along your jaw, too big, too strong. Grip careful as he wiped away the tears, cradled your head to keep your chattering teeth still. 

An echo of the earlier violence, but at this point you didn’t care.

[doc-pickles]

watching him with those eyes | mat barzal x reader x anthony beauvillier

summary: after you wear tito's jersey mat decides you need to be punished

warnings: mat is a little bit of an asshole, smut (spanking, fingering, p in v unprotected, degradation, threesome, voyeurism), brief blackh*wks mention

a/n: soooooo I wanted to do 12 days of smutmas but my brain no work so this is my last smutmas fic HAHA unless I somehow regain inspiration before christmas. but I really love this one so uhhhhh have fun and enjoy!

xoxo

nina

You knew it was a risky move, knew you’d piss Mat off. But you couldn’t help yourself, slipping on the #18 jersey before you left your apartment. The Islanders were facing the Blackhawks tonight and despite Mat being your boyfriend Tito was your best friend that you hadn’t seen in months. 

Tito’s face had absolutely lit up when he saw you during warm-ups, skating over to you with a grin. You’d wished him good luck and he’d skated off. 

Then Mat had seen you. And he was not happy. 

Mat wasn’t an overly jealous person but he’d always envied the bond that you and Tito had formed over decades of friendship. You assured Mat that he had nothing to worry about, Tito had introduced you two after all. But you knew that Mat was still on edge. 

After the game you waited for Mat, your feet tapping anxiously against the linoleum as more and more players trickled out of the locker room. When you finally spotted him you plastered on a smile but Mat didn’t return the sentiment to you. He accepted your chaste kiss before tightly gripping your waist and leading you down to the parking garage. 

“Mat-“

“Don’t,” he growls as he presses you into the side of his car. “You think you’re so cute running around with his number on, huh?”

You gasp as Mat’s fingers wrap around your throat, the pressure making you blink back tears. 

“You’ve been naughty baby. Do you remember what happens to naughty girls,” Mat asks as he squeezes just a bit tighter, your eyes rolling up to meet his. 

“They get punished,” you choke out just as Mat lets go of your throat. 

“Get in the fucking car,” Mat spits out as he gets into the driver's seat. You obey, silently following and buckling up as he pulls out of the parking garage. 

The entire drive is silent and seems to take twice as long as usual. There’s no casual conversation or music, just you and Mat as he drives you to his apartment.

You bolt from the car as soon as Mat puts it into park. When he catches up with you his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you into his chest. 

“Oh baby… You can’t fucking run from me,” Mat coos in your ear, his breath fanning across your skin. “You want me to take you over my knee?”

“Mat…” you groan as he slides his hand down to cup your heat over your leggings. “We’re in the hallway, anyone could walk by.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Someone watching me take this sweet pussy,” Mat growls and bites into your shoulder making you gasp. “Mmm, that’s my girl. C’mon baby, time for your punishment.”

Mat drags you down the hallway and makes quick work of unlocking his door. As soon as you’re inside he’s got you up against the wall, pressing his hips into yours as his hand finds your throat again. 

“My baby wants to be watched? Want someone to know how much of a whore you are,” you moan against Mat as he brushes his lips against yours. You can feel his fingers ghosting across your leggings, coming closer to the apex of your thighs. “Yeah, you’re a little slut, aren’t you? Wearing my best friend’s jersey? You want Tito to watch me fuck you so he knows you’re mine?”

“Holy shit Mat,” you cry out as he finally cups your pussy through your leggings and squeezes your throat tighter. “Fuck! Yes, I want it! Please, baby!”

A dark chuckle leaves Mat as he lets you go, your chest heaving as you stare up at him with wide-blown pupils. 

“Careful what you ask for baby,” he whispers against your lips before throwing you over his shoulder and walking you down the hallway to his bedroom. 

Mat sits on the bed, not giving you a chance to acclimate before he throws you over his knee. Your heart is racing as he harshly tugs your leggings and panties down, exposing your ass to him. 

“You’re so fucking wet baby,” Mat groans as he runs his fingers through your slick folds. “God, is this all for me?”

The only thing you can do is moan, savoring the feeling of his fingers teasing your entrance and the fact that you’re completely exposed as you lay across his lap. 

“Or is it all for Tito?” Mat asks as he shoves two fingers into your dripping cunt. “God I bet you’d love to be watched by him. Let him hear how fucking wet you are?”

“Mat,” you cry as he plunges into you again, his other hand coming down to slap your ass. Your body is already overstimulated and the night has just started. “Oh my god!”

Mat delivers two more smacks, his fingers still inside of you as he doles out your punishment. Your breath comes out in whimpers as he holds you in place, his hand continuously smacking your ass and sending electric jolts through your body. He pauses his slaps, instead moving his fingers in and out of your cunt making the most lewd sounds.

“So loud, so wet. You’re doing so good” Mat chuckles as he continues to fuck you with his fingers. A pathetic moan leaves you as you thrash around on his lap. “Putting on such a good show, showing Tito how wet you are for him, how you’re a slut for him. God baby he looks like he wants to eat you up.”

Your head immediately pops up at Mat’s words, stilling when you meet Anthony’s eyes from across the room. He’s standing in the doorway of Mat’s bedroom, eyes wide as he takes in the scene before him. You flung over Mat’s lap, your dripping cunt on full display, and his name on your back.

“Tito-”

Mat shoves your head back down before either you or Anthony can say anything. His hand comes down on your ass and you can’t help the whine you let out, “Love it when you’re loud, baby. Show Tito how good you are for me.”

The thought of Mat’s best friend watching you has you on full alert, your body thrumming with excited energy as your boyfriend continues to spank you. His fingers come back to your cunt, pushing in roughly and catching your breath on a gasp.

“So close, Mat,” you cry out, clenching around his fingers as he continued to mercilessly fuck you. “Please, baby!”

“Come for me baby, let Tito see how pretty you look when you coat my fingers with your cum,” Mat’s words trigger your orgasm, a series of moans and gasps falling from your lips as your hips jerk against him. “That’s it, baby. Doing so good for me. Fuck Tito, she’s so tight. Squeezing the life out of my fingers.”

A low groan escapes Tito and the sound makes your pussy clench against Mat. He lets a chuckle out before pulling his fingers out of you and giving you one more slap to your already red ass. Without warning he throws you onto the bed and you scramble to your knees before he can sit up.

“All fours baby,” Mat commands as he pushes your shoulders down. “Want Tito to see your face when I fuck you.”

Falling onto your hands you look up and meet Tito’s eyes. He’s sitting in the chair Mat has positioned in the corner of the room now, eyes never leaving you as Mat rips off your panties and leggings. His erection is straining in his dress pants, the sight fueling your aroused state.

“You eye fucking my best friend over here?” Mat whispers in your ear, his body encasing you as his hard cock ruts against your core. “Knew you were a fucking slut. You want him to fuck you instead of me, don’t you?”

“Mat, baby-,” you gasp as he pulls back, his hands gripping your waist tightly. His dick is prodding at your entrance and you thrust your hips back into him, eyes still locked with Tito’s. “Want him to watch you fuck me. Please, baby.”

At your words Tito groans loudly, hand coming to palm his erection as his head lolls backward in lust. Mat pushes his cock into you with a rough thrust and you’re crying out in pleasure. Your hips buck back into him as he bottoms out, his hands on your waist squeezing hard enough that you know you’ll have bruises in the morning. 

“So fucking tight, so perfect for me,” Mat groans as he thrusts into you, one of his hands slapping your ass again. “Look so pretty taking my cock with his number on your back.”

You realize that you’re still wearing Tito’s jersey and you let out a breathy moan of pleasure, your hips thrusting back into Mat. When you look up to meet Tito’s eyes you nearly collapse at the sight of him watching you and Mat with his hard dick in his hand. He’s not as thick as Mat, but his length makes up for it. Tito meets your gaze and you groan at the connection there.

“Beau, oh fuck,” you cry out as Mat slaps your ass again. “Oh my god, so good baby. Fucking me so good for Beau.”

Both men loudly groan at your words, Mat’s thrusts speeding up as Tito jerks his cock harder. The sight and feeling of both of them has you reeling, your overstimulated body bowing to Mat’s hold on you. Your eyes are locked on Tito’s as he watches the two of you fuck with reckless abandon.

“So close Matty,” you gasp out as Mat’s hand wraps around you to shove roughly at your clit. “Baby, I n-need Tito. Please Mat. Fuck! Want you both to cum on me.”

Carefully you watch as Tito meets Mat’s gaze. You can’t see your boyfriend from this angle but you know they’re silently deliberating something as Mat continues to fuck you. Without a word Tito stands and comes to the edge of the bed, hard cock still out as he jerks it roughly just inches from your face.

“I knew my little slut would want this,” Mat breathes out as he pulls your hips up, tugging at your hair with one hand so you’re face to face with Tito. “You want him so bad, you take him. Show him what I get every fucking night.”

There’s only a moment of hesitation between the two of you before you lean forward and lock your lips with Tito’s, one hand coming up to wrap in your hair while the other continues to jerk his cock. You moan into his mouth, reveling in the feel of him on your lips and Mathew pounding away at your pussy.

“Fuck,” you gasp against Tito’s lips. “So close… So… Fuck baby please!”

Mat works your clit furiously as you cry out your release into Tito’s mouth, his hand in your hair pulling your head back so you were facing him head-on. Suddenly he drops your hair right as Mat pulls out of you and both of their cries of pleasure fill the room. With a pleased smile, you realize that they’d both dirtied the back of your jersey with their releases, your knees giving way so you can collapse on the bed as they both finish themselves off.

You’re dazed for a few minutes until you feel a warm washcloth between your legs just as Tito crouches in front of you, wiping your hair away from your face, “Let me take this off of you, yeah?”

Tito pulls the jersey off of you, throwing it into the laundry basket as Mat finishes wiping you up. You reach up for Tito but he brushes you off, kissing your forehead instead of holding you like you had implied, “Early flight, I have to head back to the hotel.”

With a slow grin you watch as Mat and Tito say goodbye to each other, not an ounce of awkwardness between them despite what they’d just shared. After the front door closes Mat crawls into bed next to you and pulls your naked body against his.

“How you feeling baby,” Mat asks into your shoulder, lips brushing your skin. “Like your surprise?”

“Mmmm yes thank you,” you grin as you lean up to kiss him, one hand tangling in his hair. “But I like just having you here, baby. I love you.”

“Love you too,” Mat whispers as he strokes a hand across your cheek. “Should I just block off the whole weekend next time Tito is in town then?”

“Mathew!”

[avocado-writing]

Hello! Today is my birthday (well, in one hour it will be) and I was wondering if you could write a story with Crowley and Aziraphale with reader perhaps set in the tltdatsib series/world where it’s like the past sometime (whenever you’d like) and maybe Aziraphale (or Crowley) gets jealous that reader is paying more attention to the other and angst to fluff perhaps with makeup sex? Thank you! New to the fandom and love your work!

notes: I’m certain it was your birthday like two months ago by this point but uhhhhh enjoy!

pairing: aziraphale x reader x crowley (tltdatsib-verse)

rating: E

Crowley is jealous. 

He thinks he’s doing a pretty good job at conveying it: huffing, sitting down heavily, crossing his arms (though definitely not pouting) but you and Aziraphale haven’t picked up on it. 

For the amount of time you’ve been together, sometimes it does end up that two of you will spend more time together than all three. He’s had countless times when he’s headed off with Aziraphale around the world for work reasons, and he can firmly remember some stints in the seventies when the two of you hit the road to follow your favourite bands on tour. 

Still, though. He doesn’t like it when it happens to him. 

You and Aziraphale have been going to night time classes. He’s not quite sure what classes, neither of you have let that slip, but what it has meant is that you and the angel have been around each other incessantly. Together. He feels a bit elbowed out of it all, like the two of you have some little secret to giggle over. 

Crowley swirls his wine in his glass and mopes a bit before swallowing it down, harrumphing quietly to himself as he hears the two of you open the door to the shop and walk in laughing. Probably at some private joke that he won’t be privy to. 

“And I was just— oh, hello, Crowley. Why are you sitting in the dark, my love?”

He looks over to you and notices for the first time that he’s not bothered to put the lights on. He flinches as Aziraphale hits the light switch and the bookshop is bathed in a warm glow. The two of you carry on as if nothing is amiss; Aziraphale puts the kettle on, you hang up the coats. 

“Have you just been there since we left?” you asked, concern creeping into your voice. Crowley takes another quaff. 

“Maybe. Not sure why you’d care.”

He sniffs loudly and out of the corner of his eye he can see your confusion. 

“Love, what’s the matter?” you ask, crossing your arms, fully in no-nonsense mode. Aziraphale pokes his head out of the kitchen. 

“Is something happening?”

You gesture for him to follow you. The kettle sings and turns off, ignored, and the two of you plonk down on the sofa either side of Crowley. 

“What’s wrong?” you ask, gently but firmly, laying your hand on his knee. 

“Well, maybe you’d know if you weren’t constantly disappearing off to your evening classes without me…” he knows he sounds petulant but honestly he sort of doesn’t care. He enjoys being petulant sometimes. 

“Oh, Crowley,” you say softly, “we didn’t think you’d want to come, my darling.”

“I don’t want to come!” he snips, then deflates a little, putting down his wine, “But I would have done it if you asked.”

You and Aziraphale exchange a look. Ah. There it is. You’ve been around long enough to know that misunderstandings happen when communication doesnt. Either side of Crowley, you both take one of his hands. 

“Crowley, dear. We weren’t excluding you to be unkind. We just didn’t want you to come because… well…”

“Look. We’ve been going to swing dance classes. And we’re really bad at it,” you finish. Aziraphale shrugs and nods. Crowley furrows his brow. 

“What?”

“We’re so utterly pants. We can’t swing dance to save our lives and we’ve been going for weeks now.”

“We’re getting better!” Aziraphale says, “We don’t stand on each other’s feet half as much any more. But truth be told we are the worst in the class by a large margin - and we don’t want you to watch us dance until we’re worth watching.”

“It’s pretty humiliating. We were hoping one day we’d be able to show you properly. We wanted you to be impressed.”

Oh god. Crowley feels awful. The two of you weren’t trying to exclude him, you just wanted to be good enough to show off. He groans and buries his face in his hands. 

“I’m an idiot,” he sighs. 

“Well…”

He shoots you a withering look, but ends up smiling. 

“My dear, you have to tell us if something is bothering you. Neither of us would want that,” Aziraphale says. 

“If you’re feeling neglected you just need to say, and I’m sure we can make it up to you…”

This is all the incentive Crowley needs to allow the two of you to begin to touch him. 

You kiss him first, long and slow, before freeing his lips for Aziraphale. Crowley loves the slick slide of his husband’s tongue along his, the way the angel’s warm hand skims the plateau of skin revealed as his shirt is lifted up. You work your way down Crowley’s body and end up on your knees between his legs, your hands making light work of his jeans. 

“Ahh, there we are,” you sigh, finding him half-hard and stroking him to his full length. You take a moment to inhale the musky scent of him before you touch your tongue to the tip of his cock, and he bucks as if you’ve run a thousand volts through him. 

“Shit—!”

“Language,” Aziraphale mutters against his lips. The demon’s shirt is hitched higher, Aziraphale begins to run his thumb in a circle around the peak of his nipple. 

“Such a lovely boy,” you hum as you press kisses down the length of his shaft. Crowley doesn’t identify as male necessarily, but he does enjoy hearing you call him a ‘lovely boy’. It makes him feel small and safe, adored. 

He relaxes into the couch and lets you both take care of him. By the end of the evening, and several orgasms later, he can tell you’re both very sorry for making him feel ignored. But if this is the way you make it up to him, maybe he doesn’t mind too much…

tags: @angiestopit @foolishprincipalitee @smile-eywa @staygoldsquatchling02 @underratedboogeyman @specter-soltare @candlewitch-cryptic @cool-ontherun-world @emilynissangtr @willbedecided @bdffkierenwalker @cool-iguana @ilyatan @civil-groupie @willyoubethepookietomypookster @lxsm2 @clarina04 @wtfhasmy-lifecometo @mrgatotortuga @wereallbrokenangels @night-affiliate @silcosmoke @kimqueenofhell @chewbrry @bajablast23 @h3k3t @am-i-obsessed---maybe @bakerstreethound@a-mediocore-writer@darktealrat @chaospossum @belilwen @rex-ray @hunterispunk

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

hiii :3!! Could you do a gn!reader x geo one bed left trope pls :3? (IM A SUCKER FOR TJAT DYNAMIC PLS ☹️)

A Lone Respite (Geo x MC/Reader - One Bed)

Hope you enjoy Annonie.

You're in an established relationship with Geode muahahaha

Anyway uhhhhh. Yuh.

- Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer

Lone: having no companions; solitary or single.

Respite: a short period of rest or relief from something difficult or unpleasant.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

You and Geo had decided...well, you decided — you just had to stubbornly convince him — to go travel places after school. Specifically Japan and possibly parts of Europe.

So when you both finally flew there (on Geo’s private jet of course), it mostly entailed him just taking you to all the fanciest places (because he’s 110% new-money-rich...or old money idk) and just showing you around. 

Most people actually don’t side eye you (because you know how some tourists like to assault the Geishas and all that? I don’t blame the Japanese personally), and some are just happy that A. (at least) one of you two speaks the language and knows the culture well; and B. that you (if not of Japanese descent, which I know is most of you readers), are trying to speak their language. 

I’m 99% sure Geo has Japanese citizenship, so if –when– you get married, you bet your ass you’re getting one as well (muahahaha)

You both are just going to places he knows are good, mostly in the more urban cities, like Tokyo,�� until you both decide to visit the more coastal regions.

Geo does not live near the beach, so you’ll have to book out a hotel (this mf will book everything reluctantly lol; he’s not a fan of hotels at all, he probably thinks they’re filthy).

Anyway, after you both just wander around a beach (probs the Ishigaki one idfk), you return to the hotel you guys booked and…well…you get your keys, go to your room and...

One bed.

One single bed (heheheh imagine making your requester suffer couldn’t be me).

And Geo is malding. Very very stoically.

He’s death-staring the bed, a very cold, menacing glint in his ocean eyes.

You’re a bit concerned, because you know Geo isn’t gonna share a bed with you; and annoyed, because now Geo was probably gonna lose his McMarbles™.

So, you both take your stuff and leave to the reception (mostly him stalking out, vehement ornery in the rigidity of his posture).

You stayed behind to watch over your things, in case Geo deemed this place unworthy and dragged you both out.

And, well, that’s exactly what happened.

He came back and proceeded to bluntly state you’re leaving.

“We’re going, they refunded us.”

“Geo what-”

So you both go somewhere else, because, apparently, they didn’t have other rooms to spare with a double bed, then the staff started claiming he hadn’t even paid for it, so he got his money-decked ass (and yours) outta there ASAP.

Anyway, by the time you get to another hotel, Geo states, in Japanese, something that seemed formal, at least it sounded formal, you didn’t know lmfao.

Due to the fact it was getting later in the night, and Geo is a very big fan of beauty sleep, the first thing he does is check the bed.

A n o t h e r   v e r y   l o n e l y   b e d. (can we have 100 likes for the lonely bed thank you😔)

At least it was a queen sized bed this time.

It takes 27 minutes of pure debate, but you convince Geo to just sleep, because you’re both tired —and you told him people who get stressed get wrinkles and he doesn’t want those lol–.

So he pulls out one of those weird lights that reveal stains on bedsheets and whatnot (you know those janky ones that people use to check if their bed is actually clean or not?). And he’s *very* paranoid about cleanliness. He hates dirt.

Thank God the bed is actually clean, so Geo immediately unpacks the bare necessities and steals the bathroom (dw he already checked it as well it’s clean).

Yeah bro I’m sorry this man won’t let you wash up before him.

He might even be a germaphobe tbh.

Anyway, after his very long, very amazing skincare routine and shower, Geo emerges, his hair loosely falling down his lanky frame (omg omg omg bark bark woof?!?!?!?!!?!?!).

He tells you to hurry up and usurps a side of the bed (probably the one nearest to the restroom so he can freshen up bright and early).

So when you shower and get out of the restroom, he’s telling you to sleep. (also btw, he’s gonna crack all his joints before sleeping, he probably even meditates, so be quiet when you’re in the restroom).

You better make sure to not snore or kick in your sleep though, this man will throw you off the bed if he has to, sleep is superior to relationships for him (such a mood tbh).

But usually when it comes to one bed, he’s gonna take it from you. (He’d have to really like you to share a bed with you in the first place).

If you are the type to get nervous when sleeping in an unfamiliar place though? He’ll “reluctantly” offer his arms and you squish into him. (don’t push it guys I know it’s tempting ngh)

He’ll also be the type to go to a buffet (there is definitely gonna be one, he refuses to go to anyplace that doesn’t have one, especially in the more remote areas of any country).

So expect, when he wakes you up at like 7am, to be served food at a table. He won’t allow eating in bed, both from the fact it’s weird to him and also just…what if you drop some food or something??? He’d get embarrassed on your behalf…

But after that funny time is over, you both continue to traverse Japan, deciding to put that time behind you. Well, Geo does. You 110% are gonna try and sleep in his arms more often now. >:)

[himbo-ford-pines]

Hello stanbel shippers I’m here to f e e d you. This is for a fic trade with @baddog-nobiting !! They ordered something pretty yummy and cute and uhhhhh yeah 🙈🥵👉👈 here u go babe

————————

“Mabel, the remote.” Stan grunted, pointing at it across the room while doinh his best not to move from his spot in the worn recliner.

Mabel got up from her spot and grabbed it. “You have to say please, Grunkle Stan, we talked about this.” She stood in front of the tv and crossed her arms.

Stanley scowled. “Mabel, it’s my house. My cable, that I pay for. Hand it over.” He held out his hand, looking at her with his infamous “no buts” expression.

She huffed and climbed into his lap, pouting at him and giving him her best doe-eyed baby girl look. “Well can I at least sit up here with you?” The gears were turning in her head. She would get a please out of him whether he liked it or not.

“Course sweetie.” He kissed her hair and plucked the remote out of her hand, noting the (slightly smudged and fingerprinted) rainbow nail polish on her fingers. “I like your nails. You gonna do mine?” He joked, pinching her side.

“When you ask me politely.” She crossed her arms defiantly.

He rolled his eyes and changed the channel, pulling his girl closer to his body. He kept a firm hand on her hip.

After a few minutes, he began tugging at her skirt, nuzzling and mouthing at her neck and jaw.

She laid her head back, baring her neck to him and humming happily. His hand started to snake into her star-printed panties and she grabbed his wrist. He looked at her in surprise. “What? Not in the mood tonight pumpkin?”

“You didn’t ask, Grunkle Stan.” She grinned innocently at him, showing off her rainbow braces that matched her rainbow nails.

“I never ask.” He teased. “I’m your Grunkle, I don’t have to.” He started to rub over her crotch. “Besides, you’re sitting here soaking wet, princess. Why don’t you let me fix it.” He started trying to get into her underwear again and she leaned down and bit him solidly. He pulled back, rubbing spit his forearm. “Ow, seriously? Fine, then you can just sit there.” He adjusted so his hard cock that sat tenting his boxers was pressing right down the middle of her ass and they sat in silence like that for a while, watching tv until Mabel fell asleep. When Stanley noticed, he picked her up and carried her to bed, muttering about having to take care of himself.

He was irritable the next day, scowling while he made breakfast. Stanford came in from a long night downstairs to refill his coffee. “Good morning.” He kissed the back of Stanley’s neck and wrapped an arm around him, resting his large hand on his brother’s chest. “What’s wrong? You’re burning your pancakes.”

Stan cursed and shut off the stove. “…. Mabel wouldn’t put out last night.”

“That’s what you’re pissed about? She has a right to say no.”

“It’s not that. She didn’t say no. She… said I had to ‘ask politely’. You know, say please.”

There was quiet for a moment before Ford laughed loudly and let go of him. “You know, I was gonna take care of that grouchy attitude but… I think I’m with our great niece on this one.” He smirked in satisfaction when Stan blinked.

“Wha- fine! I don’t need you, I have old righty here!” He held up his right hand. “And he never says no!” He huffed and started breakfast over, and Ford left the kitchen snickering.

Needless to say, Stan’s hand didn’t do the trick, it didn’t even touch the carnal need in his pants. He sighed and trudged into the living room after trying to finish in his bedroom for the last hour, pausing at the sight of the kids playing video games in their underwear. His cock twitched. Goddammit. “Okay, shoo. Get.” He started waving them out of the living room. “Go hit each other with sticks or whatever it is you do.” He plopped down in his chair, eyeing them both. “Why the hell are you naked anyway?”

“We’re not naked, and it’s like a bajillion degrees in here dude.” Dipper crossed his arms. “Can we please turn the AC up?”

“When you start-“

“Paying the electric bill, I know I know.” The tween rolled his eyes. “Come on Mabel, let’s go to the creek.” They ran upstairs to get their bathing suits on and Stan leaned back, reaching into his pants to try again to rub one out. By the time they came downstairs he was sweaty and irritated, watching tv with an insipid look on his face. Dipper yelled up to Mabel that he would race her outside and he bolted through the living room without a second glance at Stan.

“That’s not fair, I’m still tying my swimsuit!” She whined at her brother as she followed him down. Stan looked up, taking in the young girl in her fucking red and white polka dot bikini. God. Dammit. he grabbed her wrist as she ran by.

“Hey! I’m gonna lose!”

“Please.” He muttered through grit teeth.

Mabel blinked at him then squealed and grinned. “Say it again!”

“Oh come on!”

“Do iiiiiit.”

“…..” he sighed heavily. “Please Mabel; please, please, please.”

“Please… what?” She bit her lip, still grinning. She was eating this up.

“God- please get your hands dirty for me.” He covered his face with one hand, bright red.

“Okay! Since you asked sooo nicely.” She kissed his cheek and got on her knees on the carpet in front of him, before wrapping both her hands around his cock and squeezing. He moaned lowly, leaning his head back. “Fuck… thank you…”

“You’re learning so fast Grunkle Stan.” She kissed the tip of his cock before going down on him.

[goldensunset]

for drawing requests, perhaps the khux gang with what pokemon they'd have? (or maybe just a few of them lol)

ok i would Love to actually draw this kinda thing someday but it would take more than i have in me atm so i will simply ramble about it. some of these are what i think they would realistically have in some sort of pokémon au and half of these are just like pokémon i think match their vibe

first off. the entire porygon line fits brain PERFECTLY. it’s like an artificial computer program thing (also its existence is meant to be an ironic fourth wall break lol). meant to be a helpful program that fights bugs and viruses in cyberspace. its final evolution porygon-z is where it gets interesting… it has grown in power, but it’s been corrupted by dubious data itself…….. as another option uhhhhh gallade. a very noble and mindful and steadfast soldier. i just love gallade. he also deserves a steel type. screw it klefki the literal key ring pokémon

lauriam was born to have a roserade let’s be so real it’s grass/poison… looks like a lovely bouquet of flowers but it can Kill you… plus it even has like the dapper cape thing. it’s a no brainer from me on this one. but i’ll give him a runner up or two. he deserves some ghost types too, becoming a shell of himself… i’m feeling poltchageist/sinistcha. grass/ghost types associated with like hospitality and seeming all proper but also it’s a ruse and they will kill you. cofagrigus is a consideration almost entirely only for its pokémon sword entry that says it ‘no longer remembers it was once human’ and also like grabbing and trapping the living. marluxia…

would it be funny to give strelitzia a grass/ghost type like phantump (dead child) or is that too sad. ok how about she gets lilligant. very beautiful elegant grass type with an orange flower. alternatively she gets floette- it’s not a grass type but like very clearly associated with flowers (and also. dying. if we’re taking gen 6 lore info account. and then being brought back to life but at devastating costs and turning the person who was desperate to do so into a monster)

skuld……… i’m really indecisive here. i think psychic and fire and steel are all good choices. first thoughts here it’s gotta be something to do with stars of course. y’know what? i think she deserves cosmog privileges. little star baby that can evolve into one of two legendary pokémon. she has that aura. (if i don’t just straight up give her necrozma lol). but also gothitelle is a really good pick for her bc it’s associated with both the stars and with seeing the future (although the emotional detachment and terror don’t fit that well). maybe delphox? but also she deserves a sword. honedge. screw it. zacian. skuld deserves a legendary

ventus….. if we’re talking khux era specifically my immediate thought was mimikyu. it’s Gotta be mimikyu. desperate for love and attention, taking the form of someone else and trying to fit in…. and zorua of course!!! i mean ig it’s more like zorua would be his darkness that shapeshifted to deceive him but like that works!! that works. the tricky fox pokémon… and because i’m not done being evil i want him to have a pokémon with the ability infiltrator. cute option is whimsicott. option relevant to vanitas’ later existence is ninjask (bc think about shedinja…) option relevant to him probably deserving a flying type is the hoppip line

elrena gets electric types obviously but she isn’t quite as vicious as larxene so she gets like. pachirisu. plus the color scheme works. or shinx

and last but not least ephemer the guy of all ever. this one is really hard….others have assigned him pokémon before that i agree with, such as rosie giving him arcanine (he deserves an Ouppy and it’s a noble majestic beast) and roadie giving him eldegoss (dandelion seeds….). it’s a wild thought but i also kind of think of mew… bc it’s said to be kinda like the genetic ancestor of all pokémon… the nexus from which all worlds spring… i think ephy deserves some sort of mythical or legendary. i’m feeling victini… he always wins somehow am i right… and he’s like sora’s good luck victory charm in kh3… but also i think he should have a water type. suicune privileges be upon ye. no yknow what he gets volcarona it has the fire type and it’s like worshipped as a sun deity for having saved the land. idk. half this post is me trying to justify giving my favs to my characters lol

oh and how could i forget the player… immediate thought is spinda. there are something like four billion different forms right. representing how player is a customizable avatar. for deeper lore reasons how about basculegion the ghost fish. ‘clads itself in the souls of comrades that perished before fulfilling their goals of journeying upstream’ those who didn’t make it out of the keyblade war or out of the fall of daybreak town etc still remain with them in spirit giving them strength, although they were the only one strong enough to survive…. (also it evolves by taking a ton of damage without dying. well it kinda does die but that’s beyond the point right)

i could probably say more and make this more coherent and provide better choices but unfortunately i think the sickness brain has finally caught up to me so i’m gonna finally hit post

[noonaishere]

Online/Offline [C.S] - one hundred and two | now you *have* to explain

“I don’t know, auntie.” 

A customer walked up to the counter.

Minsoo covered her phone with her hand. “Y/n?”

You came out of the kitchen. “Yeah?”

“Can you help this customer? My aunt is on the phone.”

“Yeah, you can take it outside if you want.”

“Thank you.” Minsoo said to you before replying to her phone, “I said I don’t know, auntie.”

You helped the customer and about ten minutes later, Minsoo came back over to the counter looking frazzled. “Sorry about that.”

“What was that about?”

“My aunt - San’s mom - was asking me if I’ve seen San and what he was up to and everything. Apparently she heard something was going on with him through her lawyer because he knows someone who knows San’s lawyer.” She rolled her eyes with a sigh.

“Oh? He doesn’t call her?”

Minsoo shook her head. “Not since the emancipation.”

Your eyebrows shot up. “The what?”

“Uhhhhh.”

“I mean, I guess you don’t have to tell me if--”

“San was a Chaebol heir!”

You choked on your own spit. You had no idea how you inhaled it, but you were so surprised you started choking. “A-- what?!” You coughed.

“Shit, I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone,” Minsoo whined.

“Then why did you say it?!”

“I don’t know! His mom always plays with my head! I’m sorry!”

“Don’t apologize to me!”

“Ahh!” Minsoo whined.

You laughed. “Well, now you have to explain.”

“Ugh, okay, but don’t tell him I told you.”

“Fine, I won’t.”

“So… ugh, okay. So when San was maybe sixteen, he met Seonghwa in school.”

You nodded.

She nodded. “When San was eighteen, there was this whole big fight in our family, because his dad is the current owner of Choi Electronics - which is like, electronics mostly, but a whole bunch of subsidiaries - and they wanted to merge with another company when he turned twenty.”

You nodded.

“They actually could have merged when he was eighteen, but they decided that he and the daughter of the owner of the other company should be married for like… I don’t  know, security or something, so they had to wait until they both turned twenty. But they made them meet when they were both eighteen.”

“Holy shit. The lives of rich people are insane. That sounds like medieval kingdoms allying with each other.”

“Maybe, I don’t know. A lot of families do it but it’s so archaic.” Minsoo took her phone out of her pocket.

You looked at her quizzically.

“I’m making sure the call ended. If my aunt heard me say that, she’d kill me.” 

You nodded. “Are your parents like his parents at all?”

She put her phone away and grimaced as she thought. “Not as much?”

Your eyebrows lifted in silent questioning.

“Like, my mom is his dad’s younger sister, so she works for the company but never had that kind of pressure, and I never had it either. We’re just not that important.” 

“That must be nice. You get the money but not the responsibility.”

She seemed to weigh something in her mind before continuing. “But… once I tell them I’m dating Seonghwa, we’re probably going to get into a fight… and there’s a good chance I could get cut off.”

“Oh my god. They don’t know?”

She nodded.

“I mean-- not to derail, but would you break up with him for them?”

She looked at you flatly, a face you’ve seen Seonghwa make multiple times when he was displeased by someone or something. You raised your brows in surprise.

“Break up with the lovely nerd-man who’s helping me learn to stick up for myself and who thinks my being chubby is cute or neutral, so I can stay with a family who calls me fat and wants me to be a doormat?”

You pointed at her aggressively. “I TOLD YOU he’d think it was cute!” And banged your fist against the counter in excitement.

“When did you say that?” She laughed.

“Didn’t I? I don’t know, maybe I just thought it. But whatever, I was still right! You’re adorable.”

She laughed bashfully.

“But yeah, don’t break up with him for them.”

“I don’t want to, but I get the feeling that they’re going to give me an ultimatum and I’m going to have to find an apartment soon.” She sighed.

“Maybe you can move in with him; combine your Gundam collection.”

She chuckled.

“But yeah, the San thing, go ahead.”

“So anyway… the fight started because San and the girl had an official meeting - it’s a blind date - and he came back from the meeting saying that he hated her. I never met her, but San called me afterwards and told me everything she said, and she seemed like, uh…”

“A heinous human being?”

“Yeah. Like a real princess who’s used to everyone waiting on them hand and foot, you know?”

You nodded.

“So then he went to his parents and was like ‘I’m not marrying her,’ and they were like, ‘What about the daughter of this other company?’”

“And that obviously wasn’t the point.”

“Yeah. So he told them he didn’t want to marry someone they picked out for him because her dad’s company was doing well because he didn’t want to be miserable for the rest of his life… And they fought for weeks. He got his own lawyer, and this whole court case happened, and he basically had himself legally estranged from the family and got some amount of money from them that I don’t know, and then they cut him off.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, he’s not in any wills anymore or anything.”

“Holy shit.”

“Yeah. I actually uh… I helped my grandma do a sneaky thing and she made my amount of her will larger so I could give it to him.”

“Did you?”

“Of course.”

You held up your fist for her to pound it and she did.

“You’re a solid girl, Minsoo. I’m surprised you weren’t too scared to do it.”

She shook her head. “I’d do anything my grandma would ask me. She was such a beacon of love in our family… and sense.”

“Shame no one else took after her.”

She nodded sadly.

“So were the results of the case their retaliation? Or is that what San wanted?”

“Being written out of the wills was his parent’s requirement. He got whatever money was legally in his name, and gave some of it to Seonghwa to start this café.”

“Oh, wow…” 

You looked around the café. It had never occurred to you that someone as young as Seonghwa being a café owner meant that he had to have a nice chunk of cash on hand to make everything happen. 

“I had no idea. Why has he never said anything? Also… I thought Seonghwa was the owner?”

“He is. San is his investor.”

“Holy shit, I had no idea.”

Minsoo nodded. “Yeah.”

“Did he ever say why he emancipated himself?”

“Not to me. But it’s pretty obvious, I think. He wanted to be in charge of his own life.”

You nodded. “Yeah, I guess all that money is kind of pointless if you can’t live the way you want and are forced to marry someone you don’t even like.”

Minsoo nodded.

The two of you stood in silence for a bit.

“You can not tell him I told you.”

“I won’t, don’t worry.”

Obviously, you had to talk to him about it.

   previous | main cast | masterlist | next

a/n: Y/n is finally learning all his secrets!

Send an ask or leave a comment if you want to be added to the tag list! 🧋 Any comments, reblogs, or asks are appreciated! I love talking with you guys and seeing what you’re saying about the chapters, it keeps me going 🥰

@rachs-words • @stayatinykatsy • @dinossaurz​​ • @conwunder​ • @tinyelfperson​​ • @anythingrelatingtojinyoung​ • @jaytheatiny​ •

[dont-touch-the-phlebotinum]

Head Over Heels

@steddie-week Day 3: Discover | 1.7K words | Rated T

Metal clangs loudly against the side of Eddie's van as he clips the trash cans. He is better these days at remembering to drive carefully when the kids are around, but he'd rounded the bend right as The Trooper playing on the stereo had reached the guitar solo and, well, he can hardly be blamed for being a little distracted.

"You know you're supposed to avoid those, right?" Dustin says beside him.

"Wait, really?" Eddie deadpans. He shoots Dustin a sidelong glance. "Don't tell Harrington."

"You're afraid of Steve?"

"No, man, I just don't want another lecture about endangering you little kiddies with my reckless driving." Also, Eddie can still very vividly remember Steve ripping apart that Demobat with his bare hands last year. He is a little bit afraid of Steve.

He can still feel Dustin's eyes on him, studying him like a brainteaser to be deciphered, like he's about to uncover all of Eddie's secrets. Which he wouldn't usually mind, except when the subject turns to Steve. He swats Dustin's arm to hopefully distract from the flush Eddie can feel creeping to his cheeks, the box of cassettes on Dustin's lap jostling with a plasticky clatter.

"C'mon, dude, how long does it take you to pick a tape?" Eddie says. "We're almost there."

"I'm trying, okay? There's a lot of shit in here!" Dustin turns back to keep rooting through the box, inspecting a couple of tapes before tossing them back to join the rest. He's quiet for a second, the only sound in Eddie's van the frantic, galloping guitars that Eddie's trying really hard not to headbang along to, and then: "Uh, Eddie?"

He stops bouncing in his seat to look back over. His eyes go wide when he notices what Dustin's holding.

"Why do you have a Tears For Fears cassette in your van?"

Shit. Shit! "Uhhhhh…" he manages while he tries desperately to force his brain into action. He'd thought that tape was buried well at the bottom of the box. But it's fine. Don't panic. Just play it cool, Munson. "I guess Steve must have left it in here."

"You let Steve play his own music in your van?" Dustin says incredulously.

"Yeah, well, he's beyond my help. There's still hope left for you, young grasshopper. You, I can still save from the curse of the Top 40."

"Uh huh, if you say so."

And that, it would seem, is that. Eddie lets out a breath as Dustin snatches up a cassette at random and jabs it into the tape deck, crisis apparently averted.

Okay, so maybe Eddie's been listening to Tears For Fears, just a little. Maybe he doesn't entirely hate it. Though mostly that's just because he knows how much Steve loves this crap, and it brings a smile to Eddie's face to think of Steve singing along, lips pouting as he croons tunelessly just to make Eddie laugh. And even when he's not hamming it up for Eddie's benefit, there's this look he gets on his face sometimes when he's listening to Tears For Fears, or Springsteen, or any of his other mainstream junk. It's as if, for as long as the song's playing, Steve's no different from any other teenager in Hawkins, fighting acne and exam stress instead of monsters.

Eddie would gladly suffer through far worse than pop music just to see that look on Steve's face.

"Wait a second…" Dustin says, and Eddie's stomach sinks once again. He should have known Dustin wasn't going to let it go so easily. "Why are you giving Steve rides?"

"I'm giving you a ride right now, Henderson."

"I don't have a license, Munson. Since when did you two hang out together?" he says. And if Dustin is this outraged by the prospect of Eddie driving Steve around town, Eddie's probably better off not mentioning the afternoons he and Steve spend shooting hoops together in Steve's back yard. Or the movie nights. Or any of the, uh, other stuff they've been up to while the kids aren't around.

"I thought you wanted me to like Steve," Eddie says. "You never shut up about him, man!"

"I didn't mean for the two of you to start hanging out without me!"

Eddie grins and reaches over to ruffle Dustin's hair. "Are you feeling a little neglected, Dusty Bun?"

"Asshole," Dustin mutters, but by the time they reach Steve's all has been forgiven. He's headbanging along with Eddie when Eddie pulls into the driveway – careful to stop before he reaches the discarded bikes scattered across it – and kills the engine.

Steve's already there waiting for them. "I thought you guys said five," he says as Dustin and Eddie spill out of the van and Eddie grabs the duffel bag full of his supplies from the back.

"Eddie couldn't find his keys. Why, do you finally want to join our campaign?" There's a hopeful uptick in Dustin's voice as he says it. No doubt he's already got a character prepped ready for the day Steve finally relents and lets himself be dragged into it.

"No, I just think if I'm going to the trouble of hosting your little nerd nights you could at least show up on time."

"Like you've got any other plans," Dustin scoffs. "Here, you forgot this." He slaps something into Steve's chest as he takes a step past him towards the front door. It's the cassette he found, Eddie realises with horror.

Of course it is.

Maybe it's not too late for Eddie to dive back into his van and pretend they haven't seen him. He bites his knuckle as Steve looks down at the tape with a frown.

"This isn't mine," he says. Beside him, Dustin pauses mid-step and turns back to face this development with renewed interest.

"Sure it is," says Eddie. Unfortunately Steve's too busy still studying the tape to notice Eddie's frantically wiggling eyebrows and take the damn hint. It'd be bad enough just explaining this to Steve; trying to explain it to both Steve and Dustin together is going to kill him.

He never thought he'd say it, but honestly, if the Upside Down wanted to open up again and send another flock of Demobats to finish Eddie off, he wouldn't mind it.

"No way, dude. My copy's inside."

As one, Steve and Dustin slowly turn their heads to Eddie, twin expressions of dawning realisation on their faces. Dustin's the first to open his mouth, but before he can get the words out Eddie shoves the duffel bag into his arms with enough force to unbalance him.

"Henderson, go get us set up, okay?" The words come out a little more like a squeak than Eddie would have liked, but hopefully the reminder of their campaign will be enough to distract Dustin. "And Dustin–" Eddie catches him by the shirt collar before he can disappear "–if any of you little shits take a peek at my notes, I will know."

"Yeah, yeah, pain of death. I know."

Behind Dustin and Steve the front door opens and Sinclair pokes his head out. "What're you guys doing?" he says. "Is something wrong?"

"Lucas!" Dustin's eyes gleam at the sight of him.

Eddie watches Henderson go bounding into the house, practically fizzing with glee over the discovery of Eddie's guilty secret. There's no point in fighting it. The others will all know long before Eddie reaches the door. "Shit," he says flatly. The one edge he had over Steve was that, monster fighting aside, in the kids' eyes Eddie was still cool. He can kiss that goodbye now.

It's going to be a long evening.

Steve's still watching him with barely restrained amusement when Eddie looks back at him. "So… Tears For Fears, huh?" he says as Eddie buries his face in his hands and groans. "I mean, they're pretty good, man, but they're no Sabbath."

"I'm not gonna live this one down, am I?"

"What, Mr. Metalhead having a secret pop music collection? Not a chance."

"Look, maybe it just reminds me of you, okay?" Eddie says, and immediately realises that confession is even more embarrassing than just admitting Steve's taste in music doesn't suck quite as much as he likes to make out.

Steve's smile loses its playfulness, turns into something softer that soothes the hot edges of Eddie's shame and makes his heart swell in a way he's not quite ready to investigate too closely.

"You're so cute," says Steve.

"Shut up, dude; no I'm not."

Steve rubs his thumb against Eddie's hip as he leans in a little, like he's thinking about coming in for a kiss – which Eddie would normally be totally on board with, but–

"We've got an audience," he says, sliding a hand between them before Steve can move in any closer, and Steve follows his gaze to Dustin and the others with their faces pressed up to the front window. They disappear the moment Steve turns his glare on them.

"Thanks for doing this again, by the way," Eddie says as he and Steve step back to a respectful distance. Neither of them are stupid enough to believe the kids have really stopped watching them. "There's still a seat open if you want it."

"Nah, I think I'll leave you guys to it. I'll call Robin when she gets off work; that'll keep me busy for a few hours." He smiles back at Eddie again. "You're coming back here once you've dropped Dustin home, aren't you? You can thank me then."

Fortunately, before Eddie can get too caught up thinking about how exactly he's going to do that the front door swings open again, violently enough this time to bounce back off the wall and give both of them a start.

"Guys!" Dustin says, his voice dripping with exasperation. "What the hell is taking you so long?"

"We're coming, geez!" But instead of heading for the door Steve turns to Eddie again. "Here," he says, his eyes fixed on Eddie's as he slides the cassette into his front pocket and gives it a gentle pat. His hand lingers for just a moment past casual. "Wouldn't want you to lose this."

[puckpocketed]

bonjour, i'm from vancouver but i have the worst sleep schedule ever so with onhockey dot tv by my side i'm abt to get into the aihl. who should i root for

BONSOIR!!! rip sleep schedule . I am a devout CBR Brave blog so, there’s only one answer here <3 some propaganda for you

i have personally met our starting goaltender Aleksi Toivonen and he’s a big sweetie . it was during this year’s off-season in uhhh february? and he was hanging out at our rink getting his reps in. i barely knew about the team back then so when he said he played for them i was like !!! and he let me take a very blurry photo 🫶

we’ve always been kinda good in a way that makes people a bit mad LMAO!!! won our first Goodall Cup 2018? so if you wanna root for the team where everyone’s praying for your downfall… get in here <3

on the topic of always being good; we’re so stacked that when IIHF Worlds is on, our roster gets STRIPPED because we have a lot of Australia’s best players! this year it happened and resulted in . um. a 9 game loss streak? <3 we were DEAD last in the league for a while. but the boys came back and we clawed our way to 2nd place in our conference pretty neatly

despite being so good, our rink is SHIT. i’m so serious. as a local, i’ve been to it and skated on it. god. soft, bewretched, small ice. there’s a fucking TRENCH between the boards and the ice too… like you could lose a small earring down that gap 😭 AND during intermission our zamboni does her best but often we have issues with flooding. smallest ice surface and smallest barn in the AIHL i do believe! this is because there’s been a decades-long power struggle between the owners and the government. (the streets are saying it has also historically been a pretty unfriendly place to the hockey players because the owner’s wife was a figure skater so her and her people always got preferential treatment LMAO) ANYWAY the propaganda part is . we play and practice on this ice and in this shitty old barn and we are still TORCHING the league <3 in a way i feel like we are the scrappy underdogs (we are not. but. we are to ME!!) anyway imagine what we could do with real facilities jskdjshsklff

canberra’s a small world so this team is just a bunch of brothers playing hockey together,, i’m SO serious. we got FOUR kubara brothers !! TWO miettinen brothers. and 2 Yorks !!! GONGEOUS NEPOBABIES..!!!

we just signed Austin Cangelosi and he’s boybestfriends with our guy Jake Ratcliffe and i love seeing them gossip on the ice like two girls at a slumber party. Cangelosi is 5’7 and got 🤏 this close to the NHL during a time where size was absolutely everything. i have the scouting notes from his draft year, and his overage draft years — i think if he’d come up in this era somebody would’ve taken a shot at him in like the 5th-7th round?? but alas. smash cut to now: he’s a small, fast, skilled player and has a relentless motor. if he stays with us next year he probably contends for most points in the league. he’s very good and fun and i louve heem…

i was talking shit about the Brave Cave but i love her so bad. we have new management who i deeply despise on a moral level because they’re a property development/building company, but aside from that they’ve put staff in place to make the vibes of pre/post games SO good. we’re hoping with this acquisition we will finally get the new rink we were promised in uhhhhh 2017. but who CARE!!! right now the capacity in the Cave is about 500, but it is apparently THEE most miserable place to play in as a travelling team. we’re a very rowdy crowd. we don’t boo our guys. we are deeply intimidating down to the last small child in CBR Brave facepaint.

on the topic of vibes: there are a few personalities at the rink who are pretty much fixtures. 1) the Cow Bell Guy; which is what it says on the tin. he brings a cow bell to every game and clangs it whenever something cool happens. when i say every game i mean like. i’ve seen him on monday nights when our beer league teams play godbless. (chatted to him a few times, his kid is a hockey fanatic and an ipad baby LMAO). 2) the Screamer; also what it says on the tin. Legend has it about 15 years ago she discovered hockey in an Autism Way and now she attends every home game and stands in the exact same corner. she heckles the SHIT out of the opposing team and honestly it would be kinda offputting if it was my team she was yelling at but she’s on MY side and so she’s a hero to me <3 i initially thought she was an overenthusiastic WAG or something but. no. she’s just on the hockey freak juice.

anyway. root for MY team. CBR BRAVE BEST TEAM OF ALL TIME EVER EVER EVER AND WE GOING TO THE CUP!!!!!

jokes aside please choose whatever team u like and have fun <3