#and we do what we can. with the best intentions
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gorillawithautism · 3 days ago
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the autism in me can't tell if you're trying to be snarky about it or if you're genuinely asking so if this backfires on me i'll just block and move on but i'll try to act like you were being genuine and not just giving sass to a palestinian for no good reason :)
olly (a palestinian) made a post is discussing the fact their culture is just that: a culture. it is rich and it's meaningful. it's nuanced and diverse. however, olly has also noticed that some people who aren't palestinian take this culture and flatten it. they appropriate it. they wear it like a costume. using aspects of the culture to signal in a two dimensional way that they are Morally Upright by (theoretically) Supporting Palestinians. however, it's impossible to tell how much someone truly supports palestinian liberation and decolonization from just a garment of clothing or something similar. that means that these people are not doing anything substantial for the cause by appropriating the culture in this way. they oversimplify and misrepresent it. and this behavior ultimately harms palestinians. because olly is palestinian, they know exactly how much this hurts them, their people, and their liberation.
now that i've so kindly explained what cultural appropriation and virtue signalling are, we can move on to how your responses were unhelpful at best, and actively antagonistic at worst! :) isn't that exciting <3
you posted "No. Stop this. When a culture is on the receiving end of a genocide, that is not the time to stop and consider the purity of your intentions. Of course it is important, but wouldn't you agree that celebrating any shred of Palestinian culture is what is important right now? Liberals love making perfect the enemy of good. Get out of your head and do whatever you can. This isn't the time for this kind of nonsense."
in the first two sentences, you commanded them to stop. you positioned yourself as more powerful and more knowledgeable than olly. this established two things right off the bat: that you do not know anything at all about olly and that you believe yourself to know better than them despite this. in the third sentence, you act as though it is unquestionably impossible for nonpalestinian antizionists to truly have pure intentions when engaging palestinian culture, community, and liberation. there are people out there who listen to palestinians when they speak. there are people out there who believe that being kind to palestinians is just as important as ending their genocide. there are people out there who know that just because the nature of genocide dehumanizes its victims, that does not mean we must also treat them as though kindness is not a priority. in the fourth sentence, you pose a question. a question that acknowledges that kindness and sensitivity is important in one breath but then acts unkind to olly in the next. you act as though "celebrating any shred of palestinian culture" is a service, regardless of whether that celebration is a respectful one or not. you act as though respect is not important, despite starting the question itself with "of course it is important" which tells me that you don't really believe that yourself. respectfully engaging with palestinians as though they are real people living real lives with real families and real cultural history is clearly not as important to you as being a Good Person who (theoretically) Supports Palestinians. that is exactly the sort of virtue signalling discussed above, both in olly's original post and when i (a nonpalestinian white person) re-explained it. perhaps some part of you realized that olly's target audience was people like yourself. or perhaps you missed that entirely because you weren't willing to try listening to them. either way that's kinda embarrassing ngl. i can see why you might get defensive instead of doing any amount of self reflection. finally, we come to the last bit of your initial reblog. honestly it's not that important to discuss bc i think i mostly covered everything but i do want to point out that it's kinda funny that you called olly a liberal. and you said that they are making "an enemy of good." who's the "good" in this? is it supposed to be you? are you the good guy here? is being disrespectful to palestinians on the internet something that good guys do?
anyway hopefulaly you now see that there was not a single person saying anything about "hesitation and inaction" since i was so gracious to do an analysis of olly's post :) one that you should have done yourself :) and next time, if that analysis is something that's difficult for you, i recommend asking questions instead of immediately jumping to being a dick. as long as you're cordial about it, i'm sure people won't mind explaining a couple things
palestinian culture isn't something for you to "consume". buying as many "palestinian themed" things as possible isn't being an ally. please focus on real life decolonization rather than being a performative ally. pay attention whether you are actually appreciating the culture or just consuming it for your own self interest and gain.
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cherrynflowergarden · 2 days ago
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જ⁀➴ bitter truths|| dealer!matt x doll!reader
sturniolo masterlist add yourself to the taglist
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she was laughing, leaning against her desk as she chatted with noah, a guy from her college. her eyes sparkled as she giggled at something he said, her entire posture relaxed and comfortable in his presence. but matt, standing by the door, could feel something dark twisting in his chest as he watched them. he didn’t get jealous—but he’d seen noah around. he knew the guy. he wasn’t some harmless friend and he surely didn’t have the best intentions. and watching her so openly enjoying his company made matt’s jaw clench.
he cleared his throat loudly, catching her attention. she glanced over, her big smile faltering as she noticed the coldness in his eyes.
“oh! matt,” she said, pulling herself away from noah. “this is noah, from my psych class. he’s been helping me with some notes.”
noah nodded politely, but matt didn’t return the gesture, his arms crossed tightly, eyes narrowing. “right. helping,” he repeated, voice dripping with sarcasm. her expression softened, her brow creasing slightly as she sensed his tension.
“can we talk?” he said, his tone stiff. “alone.” he added, bitterly eyeing noah.
she looked at noah apologetically. she barely had a chance to say goodbye before matt grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of the room. she could feel the anger radiating off him, heavy, simmering, the kind that made her stomach twist.
she shifted under his gaze, trying to hold her ground, but his intensity made her stomach twist.
“what the hell are you doing, doll?” his voice was cold, almost a snarl. “hanging around with a guy like him?”
she frowned, taken aback by his tone. “he’s just a friend, matt. he’s helping me with some notes—”
“a friend? you don’t get it, do you?” his voice was mocking, filled with a bitterness she hadn’t heard from him before. “people like him don’t want to be friends with someone like you. you’re just easy prey.”
her eyes widened, a hurt expression flashing across her face. “matt, why are you being so—”
“realistic?” he interrupted, eyes narrowing. “because someone has to be. you think everyone’s got some good in them, that everyone’s gonna treat you the way you treat them. but that’s not how the world works, doll. you’re too blind to see it.”
her lip trembled, but she took a shaky breath, trying to stay calm. “you’re wrong, matt. i know what he’s like with me. just because he doesn’t fit into your world doesn’t mean—”
“oh, please,” he cut in, rolling his eyes. “you really think you know what you’re doing? you don’t have a clue. you’re just letting him string you along because he’s nice to you. that’s all it takes, isn’t it?” his words were sharp, condescending. “anyone gives you a bit of attention, and you’re ready to trust them with anything.”
her face flushed, her chest tightening at his words. “i thought… i thought you trusted me, matt. trusted that i could figure things out.”
“trusted you?” he scoffed, shaking his head in frustration. “y/n, i’m just trying to keep you from getting hurt. but you’re too stubborn, too naive to see that half these people only see you as an easy target.”
the word naive cut through her like a knife, each syllable laced with disdain. “so that’s what you think of me?” her voice was barely above a whisper. “some… some helpless girl who can’t take care of herself?”
“isn’t that exactly what you’re proving right now?” he snapped, his patience finally snapping with it. “you’re so desperate for everyone to like you, so willing to see the good in people, that you don’t even realize they’re laughing behind your back. they see you as this silly soft girl they can use and toss aside.” his voice was harsh, each word landing like a blow.
tears pricked at her eyes, but she held them back, swallowing hard. “i… i thought you saw me differently.”
he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “doll, you’re… you’re sweet, alright? you’re too sweet for your own good. ‘t’s gonna ruin you if you don’t learn to see through people like him. and right now, you’re just proving me right. you’re proving you don’t get how people are.”
she flinched, his words making her chest ache. “maybe… maybe i don’t want to see people the way you do, matt. maybe i want to believe in people. i thought you’d get that.”
“get that?” he scoffed, crossing his arms. “’m done trying to understand why you’re so determined to get hurt. you don’t get it, do you? you’re weak and you refuse to see it. you refuse to admit that you need someone to watch out for you.”
the words echoed in her mind, his voice searing into her heart. weak. naive. silly. and what hurt her the most was how he addressed her by her name and not as doll. she felt a tear slip down her cheek and quickly wiped it away, but matt didn’t soften, didn’t reach out to her.
for a moment, she couldn’t even speak, her throat tight with unshed tears. “if that’s really how you see me, then… maybe you don’t know me at all.” her voice was shaky, laced with hurt she couldn’t hide.
he watched her, his expression unreadable, but he didn’t move. he didn’t apologize or reach out to stop her as she turned and walked away, each step heavier than the last. she kept her gaze down, trying to block out his words, but they echoed in her mind, relentless.
days passed. she avoided his texts, his calls, even ignored the harsh banging on her door and every attempt he made to reach her. every time she saw his name flash on her phone, her chest tightened and the hurt bubbled up again. she knew matt was protective, that he cared, but his words had felt like a betrayal, like he didn’t trust her to know what was best for herself.
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an; angst bc i'm sad(⁠。⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠。⁠) also tell me do we like this small title font more or the quote font one?
taglist; @mattsdolll @izzylovesmatt
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illbegottenfaith · 2 days ago
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2001 - theo nott x reader
Honey, what you runnin' from? When you comin' back to bed? Toss and turnin' all night long with me instead Honey, what you runnin' from? Where the hell you headed to? Do you like the way I run after you?
or, theo doesn’t understand what’s holding you back from taking things further
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a/n - I think I would classify this soft core smut at best? But adding an 18+ tag jic
tropes/warnings - 18+ MDNI, fluff
word count - 1.6k
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“Fucking hell. Hide me.”
You shrunk yourself down the best that you could behind your best friend, Ivy, laser-focused on the boy at the other end of the hallway. Ivy rolled her eyes, making no effort to help.
“I can’t believe you still won’t tell me what happened that night. It can’t have been that bad.”
“It was,” you muttered, stupidly trying to get Ivy to cooperate. It was no easy task, especially on days like today when she was feeling particularly stubborn, which was a problem since the boy looked fully intent on approaching them.
“Will you relax? You look like an idiot. Like an even bigger idiot than usual. He probably doesn’t even remember whatever-“
“Ivy. Happy birthday. Sorry I couldn’t make it to the party.”
Damn. You thought you had more time. Curse him and his unfairly long legs. Ivy did the grown-up thing, which was literally anything other than pretending she didn’t see him. “It’s alright, Theo. You can make it up to me next year.”
“How was it?”
“It was nice, actually. We got a discount on -“
Ivy was cut off by a gentle tug, revealing a hunched-over you. You straightened hastily, clearing your throat, refusing to meet his gaze.
“L/N.”
“Nott.”
“Planning on dropping by tonight?”
You put on a straight face, looking politely confused. “Hm?”
“The party. Tonight.”
“Oh. Where?”
Theo narrowed his eyes, and your face burned under the intensity of his gaze. It took everything you had to keep your features schooled while he shamelessly searched your face for what felt like far too long.
“The Slytherin common room,” he replied, finally tearing his eyes away from you. You relaxed, blinking hard and a little breathless, your palms a little clammy. “Can’t miss it. Just follow the stench of firewhiskey and bad ideas.”
Internally, you nearly passed out. Externally, you shrugged noncommittally. “Sure. Maybe.” Definitely not. You weren’t going to spend a second longer in Theo’s presence if you could help it. 
You and Ivy get to the party and, as expected, you’re abandoned the second she finds Ivan through the crowd. You wander around before you decide to join a group of Slytherins on the couches, next to Theo. You get handed a drink. It burns your throat and makes your eyes water. The loud bass starts to sound more tolerable. Another drink. Theo’s frowning at you. You wonder if anyone’s told him how good concern looks on his face. Everything is now ten times funnier. You press up against Theo, laughing yourself silly, leaning into his touch as he drapes an arm around you. Another drink. You’re more than lightly flushed. Theo places a hand on your thigh. You don’t move it away. 
Eventually, you end up pressed against the door of Theo’s room, your mouths a heady mess of heat, teeth and tongues, your bodies moulding to each other’s. Your eyes flutter shut, blissfully able to let go with your senses dulled by alcohol. You can’t tell if it’s the music or your pulse vibrating through your body, but you’re aching for his touch. He presses a knee against your core and you groan into his mouth, melting into a boneless mush in his arms.
“Theodore,” you sighed desperately, breath catching in your throat. It was enough to slow his ministrations on your neck which had been filling your head with the most delicious kind of static. You never used his first name despite your best friends being glued by the lips since sixth year, mostly because you never went beyond exchanging civil pleasantries. Occasionally, you’d have a chat that wasn’t entirely unpleasant, or you’d let your thoughts wander to his disarming blue eyes or wicked smile, but that was it. It never did, and it never could, go any further than that. You were too different. It would never work. You’d only be setting yourself up for heartbreak. Nothing good could come of entangling with the illustrious Theodore Nott, figuratively or otherwise.
And to use his first name was to acknowledge the existence of this softer, kinder Theo - a version worlds away from that Nott boy with the aloof face and the piercing eyes. He hummed against your neck, thumbs restlessly skimming the waistband of your skirt.
“We can’t - we shouldn’t,” you continued, once you were able to make sense of your fuzzy thoughts. You pushed him back gently, cool air rushing in to douse the heat of the moment. “Our friends have a whole thing. We’d only get in the way. It’s just a bad idea.”
His hands stilled on your hips. “I don’t understand. What about our thing?”
He looked so dazed and so adorably dishevelled that you almost felt sorry for him. It was late, Theo’s words sounded dangerously close to slurring, and if you were being honest, you should have left the party hours ago. You stroked his cheek absentmindedly before gingerly slipping out of his hold, recovering your shirt. You slipped it on, fumbling at rhe buttons with trembling fingers, and turned back to see Theo still watching you, uncomprehending, his swollen lips parted in confusion.
“Get some sleep, Nott. You’ll get what I mean in the morning.”
“Bye, Theo,” Ivy was saying now. “Give Ivan a kiss for me.”
“Should I feel him up while I’m at it?”
“It only seems right to give him the full experience.”
Ivy grinned as he walked off while you all but dragged her down the hall towards your next class.
“Aw, come on, Y/N, he’s not that bad.” She glanced at you, eyes twinkling with mirth. “You know, I always thought he has a thing for y-“
“Aren’t you late for Herbology?”
Ivy cursed as she fumbled at her wristwatch, hurrying down the corridor. In about a minute, she’d realise that she didn’t have Herbology today, but you decided to let her find that out herself.
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Hours later, you were holed up in the library, desperately trying to plug your ears with all the ruckus going on floors below. Trying to focus was a losing battle.
“I thought I’d find you here.”
Your head snapped up too see Theo leaning against one of the bookshelves. Busted. To be fair, she was nowhere near the world’s best liar, so it was doubtful whether he had even believed her in the first place.
“Nott,” you greeted, in a pleasant enough voice. “Is that the time? I hadn’t realised the party had already started.”
The music continued blasting, more than audible to the two of them. Theo arched an eyebrow, slowly walking over, and you had the decency to look embarrassed over your bald-faced lie.
“I was planning to drop by later.”
“Well, you should.”
“Maybe I will:”
“It’s almost as fun as that last party ages ago.”
You stiffened at the memory. “Ah. Yes.”
Theo leaned over you, broad-shouldered and hypnotising. He dragged his gaze across you inch by agonising inch, undressing you with his eyes. You were starting to feel uncomfortably warm in your uniform. He dropped his voice.
“First and last time I see you in my bed, hmm?”
You choked, failing to suppress the shiver prickling over your skin. “That’s - stop it.”
“Stop what?”
“Talking like…that.” You felt your face heat up all over again, cursing yourself for your inability to even pretend to keep your cool in front of him. “Looking at me like that.”
His gaze flickered to your chest, so brief you’d have missed it if you blinked. “Like what?” 
You let out a frustrated, overwhelmed sigh, your brain becoming oddly fixated on the memory of his hands on your hips, travelling up your ribcage, at the nape of your neck, grip tightening on your waist -
“Go on. Use your words.”
His breath tickled the shell of your ear, the closest he’d been to you since that night. 
“Like…like you actually want me. Like I’m something special.”
“You are something special.”
You groaned and looked away. “I’m seeing someone,” you tried, half-heartedly. Theo snorted.
“What, that Davies guy? Yeah, like that’s going to last.”
You couldn’t even bring yourself to feel all that indignant on Davies’ behalf. Not that you were going to let Theo know that. “I’ll have you know that Mac is a perfect gentleman.”
“My point is-“ Theo started, irritatedly. You took a perverse sort of pleasure in ruffling his feathers. “- why the fuck are we talking about Davies when you could be in my bed, doing far more interesting things with that mouth?”
“Or maybe it’s something else entirely. Perhaps you like having me run after you. Is that where you get off, hmm? The thrill of the chase? Being a tease?”
“I am not a -“ you began hotly, before you caught the mischievous twinkle in his eye. You rolled your eyes. “You’re too cocky for your own good,” you muttered. 
“I thought you like me cocky,” he teased. His expression softened the next second and you watched him trace lazy circles on your wrist.
“Besides…I’ve never tried this hard to get into someone’s pants.”
You gave a shaky laugh. Theo bent down once more, this time to press a kiss to your lips, then another, and another, until you were lying on your back on the table, looking sinfully ravished, blouse long forgotten.
One night couldn’t hurt, could it?
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gem-de-lune · 3 days ago
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Daily Vibe Check 11/12
Seunghan
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5 of Chalices + 3 of Swords + 3 of Wands + 3 of Chalices + 8 of Wands
There is a heavy emphasis on paper/mail/notices. He is waiting on something, such as a notice or news. We know that he has been waiting for quite some time now. Due to the lack of answers, he was able to really focus on being okay with that. But now I think since yesterday the anticipation after being fed a literal pea sized amount of not even good news but the THOUGHT of good news, has him dizzy with anxiety. He wants to be able to celebrate with his members and wants to quickly have this situation come to an end so they can move forward. His patience is being worn thin, waiting for a final firm answer, rather than feeling consoled. He feels desperate for everything to end and be okay. He wants things to speed up; he is doing his best to proactively make it happen, but it is exhausting. he is really tired lately.
What is primarily on his mind?
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10 of Swords
This is about rebirth from a terrible soul crushing situation. Just like above being how he feels. He cannot get his mind off of this situation ending so he can start anew and be vetter than before. He is really hyperfixating on resolution.
Bottom of the deck:
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2 of Pentacles
The overall energy he exudes today is very forward, somewhat controlled but intentional. He is desperately whipping something up and hoping it's the correct steps to take on the matter. But he is overwhelmed at all the other possibilities and what-ifs. He should seek balance today by mellowing out and relaxing, but he may struggle to do that.
Final Notes:
He is just anxious today. I know many of you read these for emotional support and motivation, but if you can, at some point during your day, just close your eyes and breathe deeply. Think about Seunghan positively and let him know that you are there for him. Energy is all around us, and if many of you do this, he will surely feel it on a subconsious level. Please send him those positive vibes today. He needs a hug.
He is still waiting for an answer, just like all of us. He wants all of it to end just like all of us. Please continue fighting for him!
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patchwork-crow-writes · 1 day ago
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Now you've got me thinking about the Deltarune shops... err, sorry, "seaps" and what they could perhaps tell us about the nature of the nested realities. Somebody mentioned Gerson's shop in Undertale, and about how he boasts that you can't touch him in a No Mercy playthrough because the shop's interface doesn't allow for it, and that makes me wonder if these "seaps" are in fact another instance of a nested reality within the dark worlds.
Consider the shops that exist in Deltarune. In their most pared-back forms, they consist of a menu interface, a background decal of some kind, and a shopkeeper. These three elements together comprise the space that we call a shop. A flattened space where we are unable to control Kris to the same degree that we can outside. In fact, everything is very constrained within this "space", including the shopkeepers themselves.
A shopkeeper thus stands outside of the typical gameplay rules of Deltarune's dark worlds, similarly to how Gerson is unable to be killed in Undertale. While in that space, the shopkeeper is for all intents and purposes a part of the scenery; a talking, posing backdrop giving context to the process of exchanging dark dollars for items. Their movements and abilities are heavily restricted to just a small looping animation. But when they exit that space, those entities are once again subject to the normal "rules" of the dark world - they exist in what we might charitably call three dimensions, they are able to exert (slightly) more agency upon the world, and crucially, the world/narrative is able to exert its agency more directly upon them. Think about Rouxls Kaard as a prime example of this - untouchable in his shop, very much a sopping wet failure outside of it.
Now let's consider Spamton's, err... "shop". You have your three components of a shop here, albeit in a heavily-glitched state, and you can do all the typical shop-type activities - buy items, talk to Spamton, run away... all the usual things you'd do in a shop of any kind. But here we see an example of a shop-space requiring a shopkeeper to continue existing properly, when we upload Spamton into the Empty Disk and the shop just... breaks. Stops working. We can still enter and exit this space, but it is for all intents and purposes completely dead. And to be clear, I don't think this is a case of "anyone else could step in and take the role of shopkeeper" - I think that a shop and its keeper are in effect one-and-the-same, the space existing as a living, breathing extension of that character. No-one else could possibly run Spamton's shop in his absence, because no-one else IS Spamton.
Question is, why does Spamton even have a shop in the first place? Or, to be more precise, why can't we just use the Empty Disk on Spamton outside of his shop? And I think the answer to that question is that the properties of the shop-space is the best way for Spamton to upload himself. He literally takes up less space - he has no model, no collision, no position in three-dimensional space. Think of it like rolling up a poster versus attempting to stuff a sofa into a suitcase. And the interface allows him to sell you the object you need to access the Disk, then provide the options necessary to execute that transfer, while at the same time minimising Spamton's risk of coming to harm - even if Queen's forces could find his shop, it's unlikely they'd be able to evict him from that space, if the Gerson example earlier is anything to go by.
Further, it's likely that attempting such a feat in the dark world proper just wouldn't work. Characters can insert themselves into Kris's pocket as items (which you could perhaps consider an extension or offshoot of "shop-space"), but taking Spamton himself as an item does not work for his purposes. And perhaps you COULD somehow insert Spamton into the Empty Disk through Kris's inventory, but crucially Spamton would not be the one orchestrating the process there - we would. And knowing us utdr players, we'd probably find all sorts of silly things to do with him instead, where he'd be entirely at our mercy. Him being able to control how and when he uploads himself, through the medium of his personal shop-space, ensures that his plan can't be interfered with by morbidly-curious players.
And now, finally, we can come to the "seap" in question. Using the framework of "shop-space" defined above, I think we can confidently answer what Seam means when he says "as long as I stay in this shop, these walls won't change!". As we've seen with Spamton, removing a shopkeeper from its shop effectively "kills" that space, rendering it completely inert, so it's likely that Seam is being entirely literal when he says that. It's also worth thinking about the assertion that a shop acts as an extension of its shopkeeper, so that when Seam is moved from the abandoned classroom to the storage closet, his entire shop moves with him. You can't have one without the other.
Further, being ensconced in shop-space like this suits his character very well, as it allows him to exist at a remove from the main dark worlds, and justifies his position of passive nihilism in the face of what he sees as an inevitable apocalypse - he cannot act upon the world, but at the same time the world cannot act upon him. Whether the protective/restrictive confines of his shop-space would actually serve to protect him from the brunt of said apocalypse remains to be seen... and I'm not certain he cares one way or the other, right now.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk about shop-space in Deltarune. I hope any of that made a lick of sense, I came up with it literally just now, so it might not be the most coherent thing you ever read. But thanks for inspiring me to think on the topic! :D
on the shopic (shop topic) of seam, something that drives me bonkers but that i have absolutely zero theories on is the line "as long as i stay in this shop, these walls won't change!" it feels significant to me.
in chapter 1, the entrance to the seap seems to be sewn into the fabric of the dark world itself, it's really weird.
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and in chapter 2, while all of the rest of castle town's new buildings have their own unique shape, seam's seap is just shaped like the building that preceded it, just with some redecorating
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(i love the way it looks btw. very cute.)
but when the shop changes locations, while the outside changes shape, the inside stays exactly the same. hence "these walls won't change", most likely.
and also, as soon as spamton leaves his shop, the wall behind him gets unpainted, and the table with the telephone on it disappears.
but i don't know what to make of any of this. like it feels like they must be trying to tell us something with all these little bits and pieces but i have no idea what
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dearmyloveleys · 10 hours ago
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RE: the absolute fascination (and adoration) I have with the symbolism of Zhu Yan's and Li Lun's weapons, how it reveals their respective characterisations and the discussion of humanity
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There are so many aspects that I love about FoF but I still believe how the show represents LiYan's relationship + worldview through their weapons is one of the best uses of visual storytelling and literary/visual devices I have seen in recent years. (long text ahead!)
A Gift and A Curse
Where did their complications start? The exchange of gifts. Why do we gift another presents? For affection. It's so ironically simple, free of malice and at its basis so, so human. For a demon like Li Lun who claims to not understand humans, he reciprocates the moment of kindness Zhu Yan shows him - the rattle to make him happy, and him giving Zhu Yan the umbrella to shelter him from rain.
There is something so beautifully ironic about two great demons eventually using ordinary, human household objects as their weapons. And items given to each other at that. When they first receive them, both the umbrella and rattle are just simple objects with no meaning attached to it, except for the goodwill of friendship. There is no inherent ill-intention and it is pure. Yet.
Li Lun ultimately only understands reciprocation, and not truly the innate kindness and affection which Zhu Yan demonstrates. Zhu Yan gave Li Lun the rattle to have him understand why he finds humans wonderful: Can any of our demonic powers have the ability to make someone happy just like this rattle does for a child? Li Lun gives Zhu Yan the umbrella because Zhu Yan gave him the rattle and made him happy. Li Lun understands the action, and does not grapple with its underlying intentions. He consistently struggles with this throughout the story, especially when actions do not match up with the speaker's reasonings.
Dissonance in character is an extremely human trait, and the understanding of this is where Zhu Yan and Li Lun’s stories and similarities diverge. Zhu Yan on one hand, understands the complexity of humans and is at terms with it. Li Lun on the other hand, never understands the ability to be complex and paints humanity black. Their gifts are still turned into weapons that will eternally curse them of their once-there closeness, because of each other and their inability to reconcile their ideologies. How they use the umbrella and rattle from here on, represents their differences in their views of humanity.
Double Edged
When watching any fantasy/wuxia/xianxia cdrama, everyone who is written as a fighter usually has an offensive weapon used and made for injuring and killing. But not when it comes to Zhu Yan and Li Lun - they are two individuals who will certainly be masters in weaponry if they wielded a sword or blade. But they don’t.
In the Wilderness, from what we see, none of the demons use weapons. Even Cheng Huang uses an hourglass. Both Li Lun and Zhu Yan do not own any weapons before gifting each other the rattle and umbrella, and these aren’t even supposed to be used as weapons. There is such an underlying innocence to demons that instead of choosing a blade to take as a weapon, they choose these essentially harmless items instead. Though, this innocence ends here. The concept of weapons is a human creation. The concept of making an item specifically just to harm others is an especially human conception. By adopting the identity of weapons onto their gifts, the multifaceted nature of weaponry and thereby humanity seeps into their characters. Weaponry is both ironically and ironically human, and their weapons represent both sides of human nature that Zhu Yan and Li Lun believe in.
A weapon is only causes harm in one's hands if you make command it to. Do you protect or do you do harm with it? I find it so telling and intriguing that Zhu Yan and Li Lun run off in either directions with the purposes of a weapon. Zhuyan has always been fascinated by the human world versus Lilun having apathetic views of the human world, and they reflect this in how they use their weapons.
Zhu Yan uses his umbrella to always shield his team, protect and deflect harm, while the harm he inflicts on others comes from his innate spiritual energy (one word spells). He protects this simple umbrella and preserves its goodness, indirectly making sure to not sully the goodness of humanity. Instead, he chooses to use himself as the offensive weapon. On the other hand, Li Lun turns his rattle into an offensive weapon, changing its tip into a dagger. Before it is destroyed, all his attacks are summoned from strikes against the rattle. He doesn’t care, and humanity is trash, therefore he treats this object of innocence with irreverence and violence.
Though, there still is Li Lun’s favourite question: Is it better to be a demon or human? He chooses human. Which at the very least, is interesting.
Who You Wish To Be
The thematic concern of LiYan's relationship is very much defined by this question they often pose or have been asked by others: Is being a human or a demon better?
On an even deeper level, the juxtaposition between Li Lun's use of the rattle and what he says, being a human is better, is even more encompassing of his character — driven, conflicted obsession. The same way he keeps trying to break Zhuo Yichen and Zhuyan, but manages to maintain somehow civil and emotional conversations with them, his treatment of his rattle but the fact he thinks being human is better, and his one-time statement “maybe the human world is interesting after all” are contradictory. He is never at peace with himself and cannot accept things the way they are. He is very much a child, misguided and believing that things are one-dimensional (all humans are bad, Zhuyan how could you hurt me for them) while things in reality are complex. Even his best intentions, from his line “I, Li Lun, will never run away from things (…)” is innocently one dimensional. He will never be the human he wants to be until he comes to terms with this. And most importantly, it's not even about being human. It's never about titles or names, it's about who he wants to be. Li Lun once again is fixated on surface levels that he doesn't grasp the depth of reality.
"Whether one is a human or demon, it's only a matter of titles. Just be whoever you want to be." - Zhu Yan, Ep 26.
Zhu Yan is the stellar opposite of Li Lun. He doesn’t sully Li Lun’s gift to him and uses it the way Lilun initially gave it to him for: to protect. And his answer to the Demon or Human question as written above is telling of his character, compared to Li Lun's set-in-stone answer. But despite everything, what makes everything so tragic is what started it in the first place: affection. One keeps that affection as a weapon to spread the same to others, while the other keeps and weaponises that affection to regain it all back.
Just like how he uses his rattle to relentlessly pursue revenge, Li Lun is so insistent on what should have been, that he doesn't see what can be, and it curses him. Zhu Yan sees the possibilities of everything, wants to protect the good, and it curses him. Perhaps its this inevitability of their separation and also the sliver of hope that they can reconcile, trapped in their shared respective curses, that troubles them deep down.
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Their weapons symbolise both their ideologies, and serve as physical reminders of their intertwined past. Regardless of how they use their weapons, they use a reminder of the other as defense and offense against the world. A diverged path still has met once before. The sharpest blade is still one crafted from the torment of memory.
On Visual Story-Telling
The use of these unusual objects in c-drama land as weapons is such a stroke of genius on the production team and writers' part. It gives so much more flavour and uniqueness to these characters instead of the usual sword or spear. Such small, precise, details with large implications on characterisation.
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wheredidhiseyebrowsgo · 22 hours ago
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Any Stefek fic that is based off the movie Dirty Dancing? A friend of mine said she read a few but I can not find any! Thank you!!!
Nobody puts Sterek in a corner!
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Awkward Dancing by StaciNadia
(1/1 I 1,193 I Teen)
Love and dancing come together at Argent's Resort.
I Can't Live Without Your Love by Val_Brown
(1/1 I 4,898 I Not Rated)
Derek stared out the car window as the green trees of the Oregon Coast highway rolled past. Every summer since he could remember they would head to a resort just outside of Bandon, Oregon. This was the last summer before he began college. The last summer before he had to start his future. He was going to make the most of it.
I Carried a Watermelon for Werewolf Equal Rights by alphasnark
(1/6 I 5,359 I Teen)
A Dirty Dancing AU.
feel the magic between you and I by stilinskisparkles
(1/1 I 11,432 I Mature)
“See?” Derek holds his arms out, “Everything’s working out great for you, and I still have no dance partner,” he turns to Erica, “Face it, no one is as good as you.”
“We still have one more,” she sing songs.
Derek peers over to the list, flinches when he sees Stiles’ name, “No.”
“You haven’t even seen me dance, and you’re already dismissing me?” Stiles sails into the room, tossing his bag in the corner as he does so and doing a dramatic spin to face them. “I got moves.”
Hot, sweet and wild by kishmet
(2/? I 14,665 I Mature)
When his father had announced the trip to the Argents' resort, Stiles had envisioned long days spent lounging on the beach with his laptop. He'd never imagined rigorous training sessions with the world's hottest, strictest dance coach.
Nobody puts Stiles in a corner by Stephaninnie
(7/7 I 39,565 I Mature)
Dirty Dancing AU where Stiles is Baby and Derek is Johnny and some things have changed but most things have stayed the same.
Certain Kind of Fool by saraubs
(1/1 I 36,530 I Mature)
Derek, who has been dragged against his will to the same resort his family visits every summer, is determined to spend the next two and a half months sequestered in his room. His only friend, his sister Laura, is preoccupied with her newly-bonded mate, and doesn't seem to care about anything but making him happy.
When Derek meets Stiles Stilinski, a sharp-tongued waiter, he thinks that this summer might not be a complete waste of time. There are only two problems: First, Stiles is human. Second, he doesn't believe in mates.
Dirty Dealing by lookslikenico, winglesswarrior
(13/? I 47,100 I Teen)
Stiles had a plan for his final summer before college. He was going to intern at the Sheriff's station, get ahead on the plans for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, his dad had some hazy idea of him having 'one last summer' as a lazy teenager. Now, he's stuck cooling his heels and feeling very out of place at some stuck up country club, where he feel he has more in common with the staff than the other members. Of course, that could be because the staff include his new 'how have we never met before' best friend Scott and the 'it should be physically impossible for someone to be that perfect' new crush, Derek. Who apparently hates him - but not enough that he won't swallow his pride and put up with Stiles' presence when he's needed to help get Erica out of trouble...
I May Be Naive But I'm Not Stupid by FelOllie
(18/? I 73,472 I Explicit)
Stiles Stilinski is the young, naïve high school graduate who's headed off to Columbia University (with every intention of going on to Columbia Law) because that's what his parents expect of him. Even though, really, all he wants to do is take after his father and become a cop.
Derek Hale is the sexy, mysterious, just-this-side-of-standoffish-and-rude dance instructor. He and his partner, Lydia Martin, work the summers at the playing-at-posh mountain resort teaching the over-privileged adults and their spoiled kids how to do the merengue.
The summer proves to be exactly what Stiles needs to finally learn how to take control of his life.
But, what happens when it's over?
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ramblinscramblin · 22 hours ago
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May I request scout and demo (and maybe heavy if you want) with a ftm reader??? It can be any scenario NSFW, sfw idc. I'm hungry and I need food 😭 (you don't gotta do this btw just a little thought ♥️)
-‼️
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→With a FTM reader!
Genre: slice of life, fluff! Male reader!
Characters: Scout, Demo, Heavy
Of COURSE I will write this. Relationship left pretty ambiguous. Hope you enjoy! Thank you again for the ask!
Scout
Scout definitely doesn’t realize without you spelling it out for him, no matter how “feminine” you may present.
Asks A LOT of questions, borders on invasive, but is just genuinely pretty confused and intrigued about it.
“So… wait, you were born a chick, but now you’re a guy? How’s dat work?”
“Scout, we have been over this. Literally ten times,” you say, exasperated.
After the initial long and honestly exhausting conversation, the two of you feel closer for it. He’s secretly sentimental as hell, so he appreciates you telling him so much, like it genuinely makes him feel so trusted.
When you come out to him, the support is not instant, as he tends to show these kinds of things in really covert ways, he doesn’t want anyone knowing he has a big heart.
But the second someone says something out of line that is when his support is the most apparent. Always corrects someone when they misgender you, but if they continue after he corrects them? Buddy, it’s over.
You tell scout you appreciate it, but you can stand up for yourself. He’s not really having it though, too hot headed to let it go.
Genuinely forgets your trans at time.
“Why don’t you ever use the urinals? S’weird,” the commented once as you left the bathroom together.
“Scout.”
“What?” He blinked at you dumbly for a few seconds, before realization dawns on him “oh shit! Dats right, sorry.”
He’s trying his best.
Demoman
Demo is part of team “not really my business so it doesn’t affect me”
As in it doesn’t really affect the way that he feels about you, or the way he treats you.
Doesn’t ask any questions unless it’s clear to him it’s something you’d like to talk about.
Depending on closeness he may even feel confident in making some jokes about it. Only if you find them funny though, absolutely wouldn’t do it if made you upset/uncomfortable.
Is big into giving you male experiences that you may have missed out on, mostly cliché and stereotypical things, some of which you have probably definitely done before.
“Demo, I think we’re a little too old to be playing trains right now,” you say, holding a train in your hand.
“Fine then, I’ll just clean it up then,” Demo said with a huff.
You stop him “well… I didn’t say that.”
Let’s you speak for yourself in most settings, but if you ever express your discomfort in a situation he won’t hesitate to remove you from it/remove the person causing this discomfort.
Doesn’t make a huge scene, will take the blame for you saying it’s him who’s got a problem.
Demo supports you when you need it, encourages you through your medical transition if you choose to do so/if you haven’t already.
Alternatively, reassures you that you’re not less of a man for not having surgeries or using HRT if you choose not to.
I honestly believe that Demo has been around a lot of queer people, he’s the world’s best trans ally.
Heavy
Heavy, like Scout has a lot of questions when you come out. Isn’t nearly as invasive and holds back anything that he thinks may make you uncomfortable.
It doesn’t change how he views you, thinks of you as man no matter what.
Really appreciates that he’s someone you trust enough to tell, even if he doesn’t fully get it, he understands that it can be a nerve wracking thing to talk about.
Recommends medic if you want to have any surgeries done, respectfully you decline. Fearing for the rest of your organs well being.
Heavy does a lot of reading to ensure he gets things right, but only brings up your transness if you do.
Loves hearing about your trans experience if you tell him about it, will listen intently taking mental notes.
Doesn’t feel the need to protect you, you’re a grown man who handled himself perfectly fine without him. But, like Demo, if he feels you getting a little out of your depth all he really has to do is come stand behind you.
Gender affirming nicknames, always. I feel like Heavy is big into nicknames some of his favorite for you is “big man” “guy” “handsome” if he’s feeling bold.
“How is the big man today,” he asked coming up to you one day.
You chuckle a little bit “it really should be me asking you that.”
Being with Heavy is a testosterone booster, just enjoy being masculine together.
OOOOO I LOVED WRITING THIS SO MUCH. I may revisit this idea later and add more of the mercs, for now I have more asks to get to! Thanks so much for the ask! (*゚▽゚*)
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atangledfate · 1 day ago
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The President of GUN? Lanolin's eyes seemed to shift and turn rapidly as her brain was running at high speed. GUN had no president but, then they worked for the United Federation of Nations. They did have a president and they were elected officials with alot of power. Before the war they made plenty of moves to make the world safer, but everyone always suspected that they never knew what GUN was up to. She had no idea that the former president from before the War was still in power--- she thought it all fell apart but it seemed that wasn't the case.
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" The President of the United Federation of Nations... before the War they were the head of the ruling body here on Mobius. They were an elected offical, but that all fell apart after the war started. I heard they went into hiding, and supplied alot of support to the Resistance at the time. But no one has heard much since the war ended... if its really the president... that complicates things..."
The sheep felt less inclined to fight back now, she understood that GUN was muscling in but! If the President was indeed making this move, they were the nationally elected leader. How could they stand against them? it didn't feel right to her and yet--- they hadn't fought in the war had they? she was conflicted.
Her thoughts broke as one of the soldiers ran up to her holding out a communications device.
" Commander! Coms is back! we even have access to the outside... i have no idea how or how long it will last..."
Lanolin took the device and paused clearly conflicted on how to move forward. If the president was alive, and well she had no intention of going against them. But until she had proof of that it was best to stay the course until she had further information.
" Attention all Restoration Units! This is Unit Commander Lanolin speaking! all Restoration forces are to return to base, form an active perimeter around HQ! Do not engage with GUN forces! but maintain your position until you receive further orders! To any GUN forces listening to this--- We are Restoration! and until i have orders to stand down from a superior officer i will defend this position! you have been warned! "
She released the button from the side of the device and looked somewhat apprehensive. She didn't know if that was the right call and now questioned her position. Her eyes went to Belle as if asking if she did the right thing.
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" Blaze... can you send a message to the GUN airship... Tell them if the United Federation President wants us to stand down. He has only to contact me directly... and Gaia i hope i'm doing the right thing..."
Maggie meanwhile remained close to the Mother Wisp knowing she could better direct her rage if she needed to. Yet she could sense Lanolins Distress and hoped everything was alright down below. Still she remained at her post, like a good solider she knew she had a to be part of this offensive if it came to it.
It seemed things were coming to a head fast... this might all end in an explosive confrontation!
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"It went less than ideal as he was willing to let us evacuate any injured we may have, and provide some of their own anti-fire suppressant units. However, he refused to budge on letting any members of The Restoration in with the claim that the President of GUN was who gave the order. I still find this all extremely fishy, though even someone of my diplomatic training couldn't make headway with the little information I have." Blaze was more than a bit frustrated, though there wasn't much she could do.
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"You haven't shoved anything on me as I offered to deal with Lupus while you got the forces in order so don't go thinking you did. As for Sonic and Surge, I can keep an eye on them, though those two have so much Chaos Energy I doubt I could connect to their minds to speak with them." Blaze's Sol Magic was far too different from Chaos Energy so doubt's it'd end will with how much Sonic and Surge have. "If I have to I can easily rush to Sonic and attempt to calm him down. Hopefully without having to use force." The feline didn't wish to fight with a friend.
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The knight had been lead to the opposite check point, seeing all GUN soldiers having set up from inside the base. She would simply walk out, making her way to a halfway point between the base and the check point they set up. Then she just stood there, staring at them and not saying a word as she had nothing to say to them.
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"If Blaze managed to get some help I can only assume they must be pretty strong too." Belle was only guessing, though the fact that Blaze only asked a single person to come and help made her assume they weren't one to mess with. The tinkerer was still extremely worried about Sonic losing his cool, though trusted Lanolin when she said Blaze would keep an eye on him.
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"I just hope GUN wouldn't be stupid enough to shoot at the Wisp. I've heard a lot of rumors of what they've done, though here's hoping chaos doesn't break loose." Belle had heard so many stories about GUN, even when she lived in the village which tended to be so far from conflict more often than not. The tinkerer could only hope for the best.
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The Mother Wisp was about to return back to the Shadow Void before sensing another Wisp flying up to her making her turn to look at them. After hearing them explain what was going on and asking for help she turned her attention downwards. It was hard to ignore sensing so many young Wisp scared or worried which only made her angry as while she wasn't the Grand Mother Wisp each Mother Wisp could still feel the emotions of all the children.
The Mother Wisp would then grow a size, a sign she was struggling to keep her anger in check, though was remaining mostly calm. She would disappear only to reappear right above the base. She'd then just angrily glare at the GUN soldiers, as if daring them to try anything and to see what'll happen.
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germhammy · 3 days ago
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“Fencing Team Practice pt 2”
Bianca: This is Pugsley Addams. He will be our stat keeper. He is a new member of the team but not yet eligible to be a part of the fighting squad
Xavier: again with the favoritism, Wednesday?
Wednesday: there is no favoritism here, Xavier. Merely a strategic move that frees up Illyana to be part of the fighting squad.
Illyana: thank you, Wednesday. I have been speaking with Marc. I think I can summon a few demons to keep watch.
Wednesday: Oh! I have forgotten about your ability to do that. After practice please find my grandmothers and mother.
Illyana: your grandmothers about the protections? And your mother about the Hydes?
Wednesday: correct. My mother will fill you in about Francoise. Enid and I will fill you in about her son Tyler
Illyana: wait. Tyler Galpin? The barista at the Weathervane? I wondered what happened to him
Wednesday: yes. That Tyler.
Xavier: I never could understand what you saw in him when you could have had me
Wednesday: although I am not sure it was just manipulate me or if he had any true intentions? At least he was helpful! He was forthcoming with information when I asked! Drove me and Enid to the Gates Mansion. You! You could have offered to come with me to investigate
Xavier: I showed up didn’t I?
Enid: just in time to make yourself look suspicious! And In hindsight? In time for Wednesday and I to gather clues, Tyler to chase up around and claw himself
Kylo: I may not always see eye to eye with Rey? But we share the same abilities. We could try to force ourselves into their minds?
Morticia: -entering the practice hall- I would advise against that. There is so much we do not know about the Hyde mind
Wednesday: Mother! -noticing her mother was dressed in a fencing lame-
Morticia: I am here to check up on team selection. Elphaba is going over the general campus protections. As well as what to do with the Hydes. We estimate they should be here in a couple of days. The production cast and crew has moved to Burlington
Bianca: is there nothing we can do?
Morticia: Elphaba has procured some swords. Mr Krelborn has prepared some toxins to lace the swords with. We have prepared several bows and arrows. Lurch is instructing a few stronger students in archery
Xavier: excuse me? Archery is my club. Why was I not informed?
Morticia: from Wednesday’s assessment of your strength? I don’t think your arrows would penetrate a Hyde’s skin
Pugsley: I wish to join the archery club
Xavier: absolutely not!! It’s bad enough you’re Wednesday’s kid brother. You’re my roommate? You’re of course on the fencing team! And now you want to take over my archery club too?
Pugsley: I never said anything about taking over the club! But that’s not a bad idea. Perhaps I can even form a team that can qualify for competition. Wednesday, think you can handle another extra curricular?
Wednesday: not a problem. But I do not believe it can be done before I graduate. Although? If I choose Goody as my spirt guide I do have reason to stay or at least extend my stay here in Jericho. There is much more I could learn here at Nevermore.
Xavier: Wednesday!! How can you betray me like that!! I’m your best friend!!
Wednesday: and Pugsley is my brother. If you know me as much as you claim to? Then you would know how much family means to us Addams.
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jiheiendonka7 · 14 hours ago
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the mischaracterization of jun wu by western tgcf fans, an epidemic
to illustrate with a metaphor, jun wu resembles the duality of a crying-smiling mask. while most western tgcf fans already seem to overlook the smiling half completely, i notice a trend of reducing even the crying half into nothing more than “unadulterated hatred toward xie lian".
this often results in takes -- such as jun wu doing xie lian favours so he can make xie lian feel indebted or bestowing symbols of xie lian’s country to provoke painful memories -- that can only be explained with an "evil for the sake of being evil" tag on jun wu, takes that don't make sense when scrutinized within the context of jun wu's purpose.
so what was this guy's grand objective, anyway? he wanted xie lian to come to his side. (and to limit the scope of this discussion, we're not even going to open the pandora's box of the smiling side -- a yearning for validation of the crown prince of wuyong's dreams. that will be a post for another time.) honing in on the crying side, jun wu wanted xie lian to become the second white-clothed calamity, to agree that the common people suck, that they aren't worth saving, and that he should just give up on his dream.
what exactly does making xie lian feel indebted to him achieve? it's not like he expects xie lian to come to his side as a form of debt repayment. if the argument is that jun wu's actions aim solely to degrade xie lian or cause him suffering, this view feels like a significant mischaracterisation. jun wu isn't the type of antagonist who torments xie lian at every opportunity simply for the sake of cruelty.
likewise, reducing jun wu’s replication of the xianle palace to a mere attempt to inflict pain oversimplifies the nuances at play. the glamorous xianle palace stands in juxtaposition to xie lian's humble puqi shrine. i argue that jun wu sought to present xie lian with a tangible vision of why his path -- the path of grandeur and power -- was superior.
curiously, mxtx's pen name means "the smell of copper coins and the fragrance of ink" because she wanted to major in literature while her mother wanted her to pick economics, for the latter secured a more prosperous career. ultimately, they agreed on the best of both worlds, "holding a pen in one hand and coins in the other", the third path.
but jun wu had suggested that xie lian become his right-hand man (when preparing to greet the rain master), and from the deal he was willing to cut yin yu, we can infer that if xie lian really came to jun wu's side, he would've helped cover all of his crimes. they would pretend as if nothing had happened, just as jun wu did all these years, hiding behind glitter and gold, masking away all the decadence beneath the surface.
the gilded palace is a reflection of such a path. it's a reminder of what could've been -- if only xie lian kept "pleasing the gods", wearing the mask, turned a blind eye to the suffering. if only xie lian had chosen jun wu's path, the one beaten by so many who came before.
but that's inauthentic. that's not who xie lian is. xie lian rejects the mask because he wants to be himself. he'd rather live in shambles than accept the riches of the heavens, than choose coins with no soul. even if there is a wall straight ahead, xie lian will walk straight into it if that's where the third path leads, because he refuses to veer left or right, to choose either one of two (that's actually where the proverb that inspired the head-smashing scene originates from, by the way).
jun wu doesn’t act out of a simple desire to witness xie lian’s suffering. seeing xie lian in pain brings him no joy. after all, bai wuxiang once hugged him. half of what jun wu does serves to draw xie lian to his side, to mould him into the perfect successor who will follow his path. that, at least, is the crying half of jun wu's intent.
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hrrtshape · 12 hours ago
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FAME DR — random things i catch myself doing
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⋆   checking my reflection in every reflective surface – not even trying to be vain; it just happens. windows, sunglasses, the back of my spoon in restaurants… gotta make sure the hair’s doing its thing!!!!!! can you blame me?? after scripting that im the most beautiful person in the galaxy world universe planet earth the extraterrestrial covering???
⋆  getting waay too into my own fan edits – i know, i know. i know !! but i can’t help it. cause why are some of these people lowkey bob ross’es…….. and god knows those iwishutalktalkwishutalktalkwishutalktalk edits slap!!!!!
⋆  making a mental list of all the celebrities i want to befriend – every awards show, it’s like, “ooooooooo, gotta chat with her next time. ye. ye,” or “could we handle being besties? or would she be too busy? would i be too busy??” 
⋆  doing my own mini-paparazzi test runs – i’ll walk down my hallway pretending it’s a red carpet, testing aaallll thé best angles and smiles for when the cameras flash. “which look is more it girl chic baddie mysterious diva core? do i give a little smile or keep it ice-cold? attitude?? fuck. what i do.”
⋆  googling my own name with random keywords – like “[…] + scandal” just to see what wild stories fans are spinning, or “[…] + best outfits” to remind myself that I AM…indeed.. that girl
⋆  pretending i’m on vogue’s “73 questions” while i do mundane stuff – loading the dishwasher or folding laundry, and all of a suddem i’m answering fake questions about my favourite ice cream flavour like the world is (definitelly….definitely…) watching.
⋆  using my awards as high-key decor – casually arranging grammy’s, oscars, tony’s and emmys’ on my living room shelf, so they’re visible for any.. unplanned photos. they might as well count as conversation starters.
⋆  accidentally stealing lip glosses from every makeup artist I work with – it’s not intentional! but I end up with an ever-growing collection of shades that accidentally find their way into my purse. oops ? the 11 year old kleptomaniac in me never left, i guess. 
⋆  tossing air-kisses to fans out the windows – dramatically waving out the window to invisible crowds like i’m on a royal tour. it’s mainly just for me, but I feel like the main character every single time.
⋆  practising my award speech in the shower – just in case, you know ? i’m running through all the thank yous and shoutouts, making sure the delivery is tear-worthy but not too dramatic.
⋆  catching myself using my best “signature” autograph – even when signing random receipts, i go full-on with my signature. i know it’ll end up on ebay one day, so i make it flawless every time.
⋆  overthinking my outfit to do something minor – even stepping out for two minutes has to look like it’s casual yet unbelievably chic. what if a fan spots me or a candid photo gets out? the pressure’s real.
⋆  choosing my airport outfits as if It’s a NYFW – the airport is a runway for the weary and jet-lagged, so i’m showing up in my finest oversized hoodie and designer shades, ready to be “spontaneously” photographed.
⋆  taking a nap between interview segments – there’s a tiny couch in my dressing room for a reason, and you better believe i’m getting that beauty sleep between each round of the press circuit. besides. it’s very convenient that i scripted i look angelic after waking up. so, yes! 
⋆  listening to my own songs on repeat (in private) – yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe it’s a little narcissistic, but when I’m alone, my music is basically my personal ‘bop-makker’ playlist. 
⋆  bringing little sweet treats to red carpets – you don’t know hunger until you’re in an all-day event in a tight dress with no food in sight, so yes, i stash some of those bombastic granola bars in my clutch.
⋆  updating my pinterest boards – 24/7 adding new aesthetics, vintage looks, moody photoshoots, and iconic glam shots for future eras. the grind never stops !! besides, it’s xtremely fun to find archival gowns that i could just be like… “yeah, i want it.” 
⋆  taking a pic every time i feel iconic !! – at the end of the day, it’s all about those little moments of mine. how could i not capture myself looking iconic with my hair blowing in the wind, or that one perfect winged eyeliner and i won an oscar. this is MY MOMENT. 
⋆  signing a signature with something xxxtra 4 fans – if i see a fan with my merch, i’ll randomly sign it and add hearts, sparkles, whatever i can just to make it extra special. just please don’t put it on ebay again with a doubled price 
⋆  giggling over my own wikipedia page – homemade margarita blender and a straw in it in hand, reading. yes. i do that. unemployed at heart. also sometimes raising an eyebrow when i encounter something false. like, no…i haven’t been dating dev patel. i mean, i wish ! 
⋆  humming my own lyrics while shopping — as if some people wouldn’t recognise them !! just a little “oopsy, did i just sing my grammy-winning chorus in the cereal aisle?”
⋆  leaving my phone on loud because it could be beyonce, for all intents and purposes — ready for all incoming calls. for interviews. for mysterious dinners. for my situationship to text me. for that movie role. but also probably just mom, calling to check on me.
⋆  breaking into runway walks — from the kitchen to the bathroom, because i !!!have!! to practice those killer strides. preferably in slippers.
⋆  complimenting my own acting in movies — like……“damn, i’m talented. i’m pretty good at this, huh..” lowkey shocking myelf during certain scenes, because yes, i went *THERE.*
⋆  collecting little trinkets from world tours — coasters, matchbooks, hotel room keys (should’ve probably given those back, now that i’m thinking about it), because each one is a time capsule from the adventure.
⋆  randomly testing my oscar acceptance expressions in the mirror — gotta know how much to cry, smile, or look truly humbled when the time comes !!!!
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0w0tsuki · 22 hours ago
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There's this backpedal stance TransUnity/Transandrophobia chuds tend to take once you've disproved the bullshit of "TME/TMA is just asking what's on your pants". And that's "We know who you REALLY MEAN when you say TME/TMA" the assertion that even though by definition TME/TMA includes cis people and people outside the queer community, that trans women who use the phrase must either be talking about trans men or AFAB trans people (depending on how bio essentialist the anti-transfeminists wants to paint us as) when she's discussing intra-community transmisogyny.
It's how I got a dude accusing me of secretly attacking trans men on a post where I was complaining about a trans woman getting a harrasment campaign/mass report banned for saying "hey maybe don't expect trans women to forgive and forget ex-terf queers" and another one accusing me of the same thing on a post whose main demographic I was talking about was mspec cis men who don't view trans women as women.
And honestly how self entitled do you have to be. For a group that loves to paint trans women as self absorbed victim complex bitches trying to make ourselves the most oppressed minority in the world who needs every discourse to be about us, they are unable to comprehend it not being about them. They are unable to consider that they aren't the only part of the community that transfems could hold ire with.
Sure it's a common talking point about how trans women are excluded from lesbian communities and we've voiced our discontent with all the cis mspec men who don't see us as women and see our bodies as the "best of both worlds". But suddenly all those communities vanish into the ether when a trans woman uses the phrase TME.
It's telling that you view yourself in such opposition against us that you can only imagine us having a problem with you. Despite your best intentions you have not monopolized the intra-community transmisogyny industry.
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jikooklove9795 · 1 day ago
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With the news just of JKs series, which seems to be the film split from the trailer, just with extras, am I wrong to pray that we don’t get a documentary for Muse?
I just have this really bad feeling that Jimin would say something more unhinged than he did during the Bangtan bombs we got and the interviews with p dogg, when he said he couldn’t remember the last time he had a crush, that he was alone, and he couldn’t relate to the love songs. That telling the producers what he wanted for Who was like them reading his diary, basically that whole segment is sus, and technically debunked Jikook. I can imagine him saying he’s never been in love etc. I just know he would do that. We’ve got Jimin choosing Who, about not having love, and JK chooses all songs about being with the one you love, so I wasn’t worried about him saying anything, just Jimin.
I am wrong to feel this way? I pray every night for it not to happen
Hi Anon!
First I need to tell you this before I go further on explaining why MUSE, the album as a whole does nothing to debunk Jikook:
As much as I love celebrating Jikook's bond and relationship I'm not someone who has any kind of expectations from both Jimin and Jungkook. I won't demand them to behave a certain way so that I get the confirmation my ship needs. Having such kind of expectations is not ony wrong but also unfair to them.
Anon, I hope I don't sound condescending which is not my intention at all. I'm just saying this in your best interest. I hope you'll take it in the right spirit.
Now I'll share my views on why MUSE does not debunk Jikook.
MUSE is a conceptual album as opposed to FACE which was autobiographical. As stated by Jimin and the producers they were following a storyline for MUSE. Also, when it came to MUSE Jimin had so much to share, ideas to give and discuss while for FACE we didnt get that, did we? Since FACE was about his own life and the struggles he went through, he was hesitant and holding back not letting us know much about it. Which was not surprising knowing how serious he is about his personal life.
And something which I think you're forgetting is that Jimin is an artist. An artist who will experiment with his work and explore diverse genres in order to bring to the table different stories for the fans. Stories which fans also can relate to. Stories which aren't about his personal life and experiences. His work is not always going to be solely focused on his personal life. So, try to separate his work life from his personal life.
Also, taking into consideration his situation (his country, the industry he works in) its highly unlikely for him to say "Hey! Jungkook is my bf. We have been in love for a long time now". That's not gonna happen anytime in the near future. So, what we will be getting instead is "I'm single for as long as I can remember. I don't even know how having a crush feels like".
This is the exact reason why "Letter" gets passed off as a fan song in the general fandom. Cause Jimin is not in a position to say "Letter" is for Jungkook. That's a sad reality. But its for their own safety and well being. Which provides them a cover, a protection. The same cover cause of which they were able to enlist together. Which in my opinion is the most important for them, I mean being able to stay together rather than risk everything and expose themselves.
However Jimin did provide a few hints here and there for those who are willing to listen.
And an even BIGGER HINT with this one here:
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The billboard falling at the same time Jimin goes "Who's my heart waiting for". Someone whose facial structure is not that of a woman but of a man. A man with doe eyes. A man who stole his heart all those years ago. A man with whom he's happy and very obviously in love.
Have a nice day Anon!
Credits to the owner of the video
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florainkingdom · 2 days ago
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"It's fine. I'd be dumb for me to be angry at you when you didn't know that I'm not big of physical contact. I used to be a lot worse before all the social condition and therapy." Kalak could only guess that if she was more like how she used to be then Tangle might be missing an arm completely right now, or worse. Best not think about that as the wolf was in far more control than she used to be.
Kalak then saw Tangles reaction and gets nervous. "Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to say we could deal with him. I mean, I'm not sure how I'd handle a fight with Metal Sonic. I was just saying what I heard Tall Lady saying and know she's pretty tough." The wolf didn't want to make the lemur made and it was making her nervous and anxious. She would then stop and take a few deep breaths.
"Sorry again. I can get super nervous sometimes if I think I upset or offended someone." Kalak's attention would drift back to her spider trying to get her attention. "It's okay boy, I just got a bit nervous," the wolf said, petting the spider on top of the head. "Rhy's here is always able to pick up when my mood shifts, despite never being trained to do that. Though I've had him since I was a cub so it might be something he picked up." She couldn't remember a time she didn't have the spider.
"You can pet him if you want. I promise he doesn't bite, though if he backs away then let him come to you. Mainly because we don't have any creature like you in our world." Kalak knew that Rhys had his more cautious side, though not every wolf is kind to spiders, and they've had a few close calls. The wolf also unsure how the spider would react to a creature he's never seen before. "Rhys, this is Tangle. She's a new friend and not food."
Rhys would look at Tangle with its eight eyes when Kalak mentioned her. The spider making no attempt to get closer to the lemur, though wasn't moving back. He was told it wasn't food so had no intention to attack the other.
She just could not imagine being all alone for so long. Her life had never been easy, and it was always full of strife of its own. But to think of facing that all alone without her Uncle, her brother, or jewel felt like such a scary scenario. She didn't want to imagine that kind of life so she naturally felt bad for Kalak and just wanted to change that part of her life. Or at least she wanted to be as much of a friend to her as Kalak would allow her to be. She knew from whisper that Wolves could be a bit fickle about opening up. Or maybe that was just whisper? she couldn't say for sure.
As for the Devas, she didn't know enough about them but it sounded like they meant well. A tough group of warriors and thinkers trying to look out for there world! Sounded like the justice hall! from one of her comics, only far more real and way more important. Though at Kalak mentioning she might accidently lash out from the touch, it made her think of how much alike she and Whisper were.
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" Ah! right Sorry--- I'm uhh, still gettin' use to that with Whisp, guess im to use to just huggin' or being physical with my friends. but i'll try and keep that in mind for the future! "
However at the mention of metal Sonic she gripped the back of her neck as if an old wound was bothering her. The memory of getting her ass beat by Metal was still kind of fresh! She survived and even got her licks in, but he was nothing to sneeze at. If anything Sonic told he was true she hadn't even seen a fraction of his full power and she likely just got lucky he didn't come at her at full power.
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" Dunno, you folks from Flora are pretty tough, but thing is... everytime Metal loses. Eggman just improves Metal a little more... so by this point... he's crazy strong. I can say that... cause i got put in the infirmary by the guy..."
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tan1shere · 7 hours ago
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Tattoos
A/n: Was just listening to Agora Hills when I just had to write a little something about it - sorry if this isn't the best. Have this while I work on her favorite. I didn't know what to do at the end 😔
Warnings - smuttyish content ?! || masterlist
You thought you hid it well but you guess not. You were currently on your way home from a long shift at work. It was currently 8 pm. You open the door to your home and head in. You see her standing there infront of you, loose sweats and a loose button up shirt. She had done a few things today so probably just wanted to be comfortable with that and the sweatpants on. You look at her confused on why she's just standing there. "Hi babe." You say with caution. "Licking on her tattoos, or even my own." Whyd that sound so familiar.
"Maybe hitting and smacking too." Your face stays the same, utterly confused. "Hello to you to?" You walk further in when she flashes a black book. Your sex book. It was just some silly thing you had written in for laughs, even if deep down those were some actual fantasies of yours. "Oh..." How'd she even find it. You don't even remember where you last put it, it had been that long. "Got home earlier today and wanted to clean our room a bit. Then found this. Is it true?" You didn't know whether to feel embarrassed or nervous.
Her head tilts at you and that's when your nerves kicked in. Billie would never ever make you feel embarrassed over anything. "They might be." You fiddle with your fingers. "Yeah? You wanna lick my tattoos? The one on my spine." Your throat closes that was the exact one you were thinking of. That and the one on her upper. Upper. Thigh. "Where else?" She walks over to you slowly. "I uhm.. uh-" "My thigh one?" You look into her eyes, hers were droopy. "You didn't read it all right?" She smirks.
How dumb could you be right now. "Sure did baby. Got some interesting desires in here." Your head spins at the closeness, her lips being so close to your own. "You know, I think I wanna lick on that one tattoo of yours. You know what one I'm talking about. It's almost like mine." You gulp loudly. You had a tramp stamp on your lower back, she was talking about that. "You can.." You quietly utter. "Can I?" Her tone was mocking. You stay quiet. "I mean, i was planning to do so anyway." Then suddenly you were being slung over her shoulder. Heading straight for the bedroom. She lays you down, hovering over you hungrily.
Your breath catches as she hastily takes your pants off. Her hands reach to lift your shirt up a bit. "Bills." You sigh out, really wanting to be the one to kiss her dragon tat. "Patience, I'll give you what you want." You let out an annoyed whine, wanting to now. "Hey hey, don't be like that. Just want to admire you first. Then I'm all yours." You nod slowly, taking in her words. Calming down just slightly as her fingers run over your body. But you get impatient again.
"Baby let me lick on your tattoos."
She smirks at you as you say that, grabbing your waist and flipping you so you're straddling her. Your hands retract to the sides of her stomach. She smiles up at you. "Go on then, take my pants off." You gladly obey, starting to pull them both off. Your eyes land right on the tattoo, big and beautiful. Her hand cups your jaw. Swiping some drool that had escaped in the process. "Look at you, such a mess already and we haven't even started. Cute." She smirks at you, loving how your face relaxes into your hand like putty. "Go on baby, know you're dyin for it."
You nod yet again, moving your face to her thigh, your tongue darting out and licking slightly over the ink. She watches you intently, moving her hand into your hair, lacing it throughout. "That's it.." She says more so to herself. But you clearly hear it. Going mental inside. It made you wonder what else she'd be willing to do in the dumb little book of yours. Your tongue eagerly moves all over the dragon, slowly becoming dazed as you can smell her so close, your head moves. Going to just have a little lick but she grabs your face. "Just the tattoo." She was messing with you.
She knew how badly you wanted to taste her with your raging oral fixation. "But please.. The smells going to my head." You whine. She chuckles at you, faking a sad look. "Naww, is it making that stupid brain go fuzzy?" Another nod. "Shame, tattoo. Keep doing what you were doing." She was so tempting, you just wanted to have a little lick of her. But you adored how much she was enjoying the show of your licks on her tattoo. It was different for the both of you, something simple yet still effective. "There you go, so good at listening huh?" Your teeth retract going to bite, she lets out a breath but she sure as hell enjoyed the action. Biting her lip in the process.
You may not of gotten a taste of her that night but she got a taste of an amazing show.
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