#and thus don't know if they're actually true or not

[splinter-cat]

I don't know enough about our history/history in general to answer many of the questions, sadly, but I'll try for a couple:

4. Honestly this is hard, because I love inserting trans OCs into any historical show I watch and they all have different challenges that would be interesting to see. I think what I come back to most though is something like Downton Abbey.

So for example for a Downton Abbey like setting, I picture a trans man as one of the footmen. I'm not much interested in the noble/upper class characters tbh but to see how he navigates being around them would be interesting to me, especially where the jobs themselves were so gendered (to my knowledge). I've heard (though not confirmed) that many footmen were queer because nobles wanted less risk of their daughters getting with the servants/getting pregnant, so I'd like to see him interacting with other queer men, too.

The thing that makes a Downton Abbey setting more interesting than say a Bridgerton setting to me is WWI. So if that happened during the series, what happens to our lead? Does he sign up and go to war? Or does he not want the risk of being discovered? How does he deal with people who question why he's not going? Etc.

I'd also be interested in a broader look at the era, too, like comparing and contrasting the experiences of the trans man working as a servant to nobles vs one working in a factory, because the cultures were very different.

7. I honestly don't know, like I did have a couple incidents when I was younger where I might have just died without modern medicine sooooo setting those aside I'd probably go for... probably post Civil War and pre WWI? If I had a to choose a time in American history that is, I don't know enough about world history other than "a lot of it sucked for a lot of people." I'd much rather avoid any major wars, idk. I honestly probably wouldn't have figured myself out, I'd just know I had the desire to wear and do "men's" things but the fear that I wasn't allowed them would probably have outweighed that without a community around me (I didn't even figure myself out until after years and years of being around online trans communities). I think I would have avoided having kids as much as possible.

8. Hopefully my writing, I'd like to break into screenwriting one day and it'd be cool to be known for creating/running TV shows about queer characters.

since October is queer history month:

who is your favorite historical trans man/transmasc?

what areas of transmasc history do you wish were more discussed?

which historical trans men/transmascs deserve more attention & praise today?

if you could have a period drama starring a transmasc main character, where and when would it be set? who would the character be?

who is your favorite transmasc activist from history? what did they do?

what are some things you think people misunderstand or don't consider when talking about transmasculine history?

(for transmascs) If you had to live in a different point in history (pre-1950s!), where and when would you choose? how do you think you would have navigated life as a transmasc?

(for transmascs) if you became a famous transmasc icon, what would you be known for?

answer in reblog and tags, @ your friends, use this as an ask game, whatever you want!

[ofpolitics]

me desiring to be a smol menace on the dash vs the fear of accidentally being mean instead of funny: a constant battle.

[theflyingfeeling]

I think Niko is shipping Olli and Aleksi…👀

oh, for sure 😌 and he's absolutely right to do so as well <3

so yeah who else tried googling 'michael jackson anti-gravity lean meme' or something to figure out what the hell that was all about. I mean not meeeee

[unproduciblesmackdown]

already was musing on how like, here's an intro that's Establishing Things, and it's like, does it matter that we were given a quants interaction of winston being like "hey you were nice to me there, actually. it reminds me of how" only for rian to pull the nice maneuvers of not wanting to listen to him share anything, being willing to just issue an order to someone about what he gets to do (talk for ten seconds) and doing so, then some underwhelming flair used to insult him surely, i guess that he's so stupid(tm) or whatever. like, wondering does that mean anything really that that was just about rian being an asshole, as has been sprinkled in before, just little moments that deadend with winston just feeling Disheartened b/c rian was shitty for no reason. does it mean anything that she did anything for the quant duo before that in refusing a chance to not sit next to him. theoretically just a [we're still tmc] kind of choice to stick together, and sure didn't move her to even treat him like a person she dislikes, just a nonperson she also dislikes

and relatedly it's going to be just as hilarious as rian, what, implying winston hasn't heard / of the french language, that the theory that rian and dollar bill become some kind of duo based on being Hilarious(tm) but also just terrible to any & everyone and bullying people has only more plausible, And that this episode of billions' introduction / establishment of dollar bill is decidedly centered around "yeah nobody likes this guy or can stand to deal with him. not even the people paid to be there, not even the self-declared Too Nice guy who kept choosing hanging out with dollar bill & his bullying over working & hanging out with his friend taylor" so it sure doesn't seem like that's leaving much room for [oh that was an oversight] if dollar bills going to fuck off into mpc hq on the regular and rian's immediately going to be like of course i can roll with this fuckin asshole

and truly a distillation of "rian's supposedly gets the 'good' treatment of More Material & being taken more seriously by other characters, but this only meant that instead of any sense of character &/or her own actual subplots ever, she's whatever a different more prominent character needs for their plot at any given time; winston's peripheral funny little guy unimportance & insulting treatment is still so much better re: being a character" if winston gets the worst treatment of being shoved out of mpc by episode three and rian is graced with hanging around most or all season only to be judged & condemned to now have that loss of [quant duo] replaced with being insufferable bullying horrible person dollar bill's New Friend and like, right away, with ease. and like i was saying like i would not argue with that, if rian had the consistent principle of treating anyone with basic respect she wouldn't be treating winston as a nonperson, and of course she has a broader capacity for being an asshole to anyone at any point that's just drier and less [outbursts of physical aggression] than dollar bill's style.

no idea what rian's overall arcs could be when yknow, why is she here, why has she stayed here, her most relevance right now gets to be "has the dialogue capacity to talk about getting prince with a sex scandal. also has zero thoughts on how power factors into one rather than that you just need to be polite about it?" which only feels truly character specific when held up against "rian was supposedly bullied but also Above even hating the people who did it. but she is also a bully and not even especially emotionally detached about it, even though how she treats winston is more important than how she feels about it" like basically "also a bully" is her most coherent deal. and it's just Interesting that simply being mean to winston is again basically pointed out, and her future bestie or [put in the same shots duo status] dollar bill is Impending but the episode was like "yeah of course everyone hates this guy, for being awful" and the joke nonjoke the whole time that unfortunately rian might get along just fine with bill as workplace (and probably also life in general, it's not a honed strategy they limit to the office) bullies

so that That's what rian gets for getting to stick around, while winston Might get to be shoved out of the fund hq with any character flair from him and, i do unfortunately have to wonder harder now, maybe any relevance afforded to the way people have treated him, indeed maybe rian especially, his personal bully and abusive friend. and because other people also see rian as better than him & maybe also winston as [not a person], if winston does anything that's indeed deliberately petty, mean, Angry, etc, towards rian, That will be seen as unacceptable vs the yknow checks notes years of cruel interpersonal treatment from rian to winston, but nothing hangs in the balance on that front, people won't suddenly be like "nice. winston's a person to me now, which, why am i even in a position to Decide that" if he's shoved out & goes quietly & politely and creates no problems in return. and, very much like dollar bill, i don't think rian will change, but for winston's own sake it would be Heartening if he voices his experience such that we know he knows it was bullshit, even though of course rian, and probably anyone else, isn't going to choose to listen past 5 seconds, least of all when he's clearly indicating a general state of irritation. rooting for flair and idiosyncrasy for him and indeed that the best sources for that could be with taylor, please, the person he's always been here for, rian, the person for years now bullying him more than she does anyone else or more than anyone else does to winston, and even fun if there's anything with tuk his apparent genuine friend tuk, and by "fun" i mean "such a delight i daren't really think much abt it From Canon"

anyways the tl;dr i suppose is that winston getting apparently thrown away in the first third of the season is insulting treatment but rian getting to stay and be dollar bill's wretched bestie is truly the worse fate and basically that distillation of like. oh winston's bringing it on himself he's so annoying nobody likes him, while in actuality all the ways he's never fit in or done things "right" and how he would never have been hired if taylor hadn't done it are all compliments and endorsements. while rian's been viewed as a capable valuable person by all from the start and treated as Better Than even others who are still also seen people, but her "success" and the shit she gets to continue to do in how she treats people b/c nothing about being at work stops that and some things facilitate & reward it, see: also dollar bill being around the whole time & now also back, definitely include treating a friendly coworker any which way, which she usually chooses to be: badly. and of course shoutout to the thread of taylor being like "if you stay btw you'll probably get all fucked up" but like also rian just Brought the [i'm a bully but it's fine when i do it. it's bad when it happens to Me] stance from the start, but like, obviously always the opportunity to get worse and just be left off with that implication of Never Trying To Learn, just like your new good friend dollar bill

real tl;dr As Fates Go winston being shitted on & fired / driven to quit >>>>>>>> rian sticking around, befriending dollar bill. and like not in the way i'm arguing that the fate is worse like In Conceptual Quality. it's just a hell of a potential condemnation / indirect illustration of like, here's this person it's horrible to be around, here's a reminder rian is cruel to this coworker on a dime anytime, here's rian deciding the horrible person is Alright anyways. maybe they'll be busy with a bullying power struggle the whole time. and maybe winston will get to appear outside the fund actually. just really something to be going like "oh my god lmao rian and dollar bill might actually be specifically getting along well as fellow [be horrible to coworkers] bullies and assholes who feel Above It, it being many other people, this being a kind of requirement there" and to be wondering if billions will make this fact that rian's job is being an asshole more relevant at all, if even to be like yeah leaving off with a lost cause here, including that i really doubt winston can Get Through To her even with his ability & willingness to air his grievances, and like, as though oh actually winston brought it upon himself b/c rian just didn't knowww, that's on him and his visible pain & verbal expressions of that pain & requests that she stop which Weren't Enough, and as though maintaining that onesided dynamic for bullying and demeaning and shutting down and abusing was like an unconscious accidental coincidence every time and not its own Active Process, regardless of what the other person does or doesn't do, and with the agenda of maintaining that [i'm the person who chooses how things go; they're the object that reacts accordingly like it's laws of physics level of demands of reality] one-sided relationship, so they'd only just be looking to react to what that other person does or doesn't do in ways that serve those purposes anyway. sometimes rian's "nicer" but she's still the one deciding how everything goes, winston can only roll with it like a ball at the top of a ramp like, of course, unquestionable. cue space winston, zero gravity

haha another tl;dr. winston being disposed of is a warmer Fate to assign a character than rian's potential "of course she's friends with dollar bill now" like lmfao Ouch. but yeah of course.

[beatrice-otter]

You’re seriously still blaming Trump on “Bernie Bros”? Time for democrats to start taking responsibility for putting up shitty candidates and deflecting blame toward everyone else, for once

Trump was elected by a very narrow margin. And there was a ton of polling and data crunching and statistical modeling going on during and after the election, so we actually know what the factors that tipped the needle Trump's direction are.

One of the biggies is leftists who thought Hilary was insufficiently far left. If every leftist who loved Bernie and disliked Hilary because she wasn't perfect enough had held their nose and voted for Hilary, Trump would have lost. They're not the only demographic that's true of; there are a number of others who, if they had turned out in force, would have turned the tide of the election. For example, if a higher percentage of Black women had voted, Trump would also have lost. You know what the difference is between your average Bernie Bro and your average Black woman? Your average Bernie Bro is white and thus a hell of a lot less likely to have his vote suppressed. He is a hell of a lot more likely to find it easy to vote. This is not me saying this because I don't like them, or because I think Hillary was a perfect candidate. This is me saying that when you look at the actual numbers, leftist ideologues who refused to vote for a candidate who was not their perfect choice was one of the main reasons Trump got four years in the White House.

In general, regardless of the candidates involved, if 55% of American adults vote in a national election, the Republican wins in a landslide. If 60% of American adults vote, the Republican wins by a bare margin. If 65% of American adults vote, the Democrat wins by a bare margin. If 70% of American adults vote, the Democrat wins by a landslide. If 75% of American adults voted--and voted regularly in every election--the Republican party would cease to be a significant force in American politics.

This has been known for decades. Republicans will show up and vote no matter what; a very high percentage of Democrats and left-leaning voters will only show up if the candidate in question is perfectly in line with their views. That's why we have a Congress that is dominated by Republicans despite most of the country not liking them, and that's why we have most of the political problems that they do. By waiting for a political candidate who is good enough, you are directly ceding power to the people who are making the world worse.

Elections are decided by the people who show up. If you do not show up to vote, your vote does not get counted. If politicians want to get re-elected, they have to listen to the people who will vote for them. If they try to listen to the people who don't regularly vote, they are far more likely to lose re-election than if they listen to the people who show up every election. And conservatives show up every election. If liberals and leftists changed our voting habits and voted in every single election--voted for the furthest left candidate in the primary, and whoever got the Democratic nomination in the general election--we would prove ourselves to be a voting bloc worth listening to and the party would move left in response.

You want a candidate who perfectly fits your vision and ideals for what America should be? That doesn't happen in a vacuum. That takes work, and the most basic level of that work is showing up to vote now and every time there's an election to vote in.

[yumeka-sxf]

Well, seems like something that was just a theory before has come very close to truth...

Because of this major revelation, I wanted to take a deep dive into what we know about Donovan so far and how hints throughout past chapters could indeed indicate that he can read minds. While we still don't have concrete proof for this other than Melinda's word, I don't believe there's anything that discredits this idea, either. In fact, many things throughout the series support it.

First we have Loid's encounter with Donovan way back in chapter 38. I always found it strange that we never got insight into Donovan's thoughts throughout that whole exchange. We always get to know what characters are thinking, even without Anya's mind-reading support. It's not an uncommon storytelling mechanic in general after all, especially for manga. Yet, Endo chose not to give us any insight into what Donovan was thinking. I figured this was simply to avoid spoiling anything about what his exact plans and motives are for future stories (also why Anya was absent for this). But now it seems like this could have also been to hide the fact that he can read minds. If he can read minds, certain things he said during that exchange take on a more ominous meaning. For example, what he said below about how people can never truly understand each other.

It's been a headcanon of mine that the reason why Anya, and perhaps Donovan, were given mind-reading powers, stemmed from the desire for world peace...the idea being that if people could read each other's minds - in other words, always know what others are thinking and feeling, sympathy and understanding would abound.

We learn later on that Donovan had ideas like this even as a kid when he made a similar comment during his debate competition speech. He said that it's impossible to know the true intentions of others so people will forever doubt each other, thus war is inevitable.

We also have the little detail in today's chapter that Donovan did not have the scars on his head during Melinda's flashback (of course, he didn't have them as a kid in chapter 99 either).

Now this is totally my theory, but if we take Melinda's words as the truth, without any misunderstanding, then sometime in Donovan's adult life after he married and had a child, he was experimented on and was given mind-reading powers, perhaps by force but most likely by choice. Now that he has these powers, his laments about people not being able to understand each other are no longer true, at least not for him. Perhaps the experiments done on Anya were preliminary tests that he put together to perfect the mind-reading implementation science before actually doing it to himself. Again, totally just speculation, but not out of the question.

Then we have Demetrius...we learned in chapter 93 that Anya has trouble reading his mind.

If we put that together with Melinda's comment in today's new chapter, that Demetris also took note of Donovan being able to read minds...

...then perhaps Demetrius conditioned himself to think in ways that would make it difficult for his mind to be read, specifically to thwart the "alien" that's impersonating his father. I mentioned last time that I don't think Donovan is actually an alien, and that this description is the only explanation Melinda could come up with to explain his mind-reading powers. If this is true though, it really does make the Desmond dinner scene all the more telling...that throughout all those panels without dialogue, Donovan was absorbing the deepest inner thoughts of his family members (and again, no insight into his own thoughts, just like in chapter 38).

But if the "Donovan can read minds" theory holds true, then the most disturbing idea of all is that Donovan knows that Twilight is a spy. He knows that he's the target of Twilight's mission, and that Twilight seeks to thwart him. Not only that, but depending on what he's read of Damian and Melinda's minds, he knows that they're fond of Anya and Yor, respectively - people who are close to Twilight. Mind-reading powers in the hands of a child are one thing, but in the hands of a shrewd and power political figure...I'm both excited and anxious to find out what Donovan's next move will be!

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Love when people belittle resistance to nuclear plants by pretending the only concerns people have are "nuclear fallout" and "toxic waste" rather than,perhaps, the massive clusters of birth defects that pop up in the wake of a TON of industrial industries, including nuclear, all of which are often defaulted to THE SAME SMALL RURAL TOWNS thus ensuring that those towns are subject to a cumulative level of toxicity that can be seen in the physiological prognosis of the entire town for literal generations

Like I'm sorry. Sometimes a logistical concern isn't as simple as "those dumb hicks don't know nuclear plants are safe now". I always remember the hullaballoo folks made about "but what if solar fields kill all our fields and the sheep have nothing to graze", accusing them of believing the solar panels would "absorb too much of the sun" rather than the more complex (and if not exactly reasonable, at least an understandable conversation to need to CONFIRM UNDERSTANDING OF before acting on) "hey a lot of the parts in this are heavy metals, and you're asking us to alter large amounts of terrain in ways that could disturb root systems and if that mixes badly this could kill our crops, can you confirm that won't be an issue?"

And like. I dunno. Maybe interconnectedness means that when someone says they're not sure they agree with you that the pros outweigh the cons, you need to consider the possibility that could actually be true.

[bamfkeeper]

SFW Headcannons: Kurt and his Bamfs

a/n: Obviously I love the bamfs, and I had to do some of these with them because I adore them and I want my own army of them, damnit. Depictions heavily taken from Nightcrawler (2014) comic series. Pretty hasty, just a fun little set of headcannons. I hope you enjoy <3

The bamfs were something you hadn't anticipated, there were so many and their origin was difficult to wrap your head around. Kurt tried to explain it, but you were distracted by the curious bamfs staring at you.

They were adorable, about a dozen? Maybe more? They all were curious, they looked at you with big, round eyes. They seemed so innocent, and you couldn't help but smile.

Kurt was skeptical, they usually weren't this well behaved. You adored these little guys, and welcomed them like a horde of puppies rushing to you. They all jumped on you and made cooing noises as they played, like actual puppies. They were so playful, you didn't understand why Kurt was confused.

That was until you realized that the bamfs were as mischievous as they were playful. They were little gremlins, slightly destructive, and they tended to get into trouble like toddlers.

The bamfs don't speak, but they make an array of noises. Coos, squeaks, hisses, trills, etc. They communicate mostly through noises you come to recognize and body language.

They were a handful, they would make messes and look guilty after. You wanted to scold them, but their big round eyes looked up and that guilt got to you. You forgave them of course, Kurt sometimes says you have to be a little more firm with them or they will always guilt trip you to get away with things.

You didn't care. They practically adopted you as their mama.

There are lots of them, but you always show them equal love and affection. They are pretty needy for it, and like feeling pampered in the way that you treat them.

The bamfs get jealous easy too.

They are protective of you, just like Kurt, and they won't hesitate to keep you safe the best they can. They hiss and the fur on their backs raise a little.

Don't be fooled by their small size, they are like blue darts, they are incredibly hard to fight if they attack.

Each one has their own personality. They are all playful and a handful of troublemakers, but each one has something that makes them unique. More sensitive, more artistic, more sneaky, etc.

You love sleeping now because you have a big nest full of small blue bamfs curling up against you. They're so fuzzy and warm, you hold as many as you can to your chest while they rest pile around you.

Some bamfs stay behind when Kurt goes away just to keep you company.

You really do love taking care of them, and Kurt loves to watch you love on the bamfs. He thinks it's endearing and sweet.

He doesn't understand how you seem to get the bamfs to do what you say. They listen to him, but normally he has to say something over and over before they decide to listen. With you, it's instantaneous. You ask them to calm down, they do. You ask them to stop fighting, they do. It boggles him how they just obey you so easily.

Part of him thinks they only obey you to annoy him even further, and that might be true, but they also care a lot about you and they want nothing but to see you happy.

Also these things can EAT. They consume so much food you think their little tummies are going to explode. They have a strong liking for popcorn and sweets, to which Kurt tries to limit because hyper bamfs are extremely difficult to deal with.

However, a dozen or so begging you with their eyes is so hard to say no to.

And thus, you have a house full of bamfs bouncing off the walls.

You have a lot of fun with the bamfs, they can be a bit overwhelming from time to time, but at the end of the day when you get into bed and they all come snuggling close to you, you know it's worth it.

Thanks for reading.

*BAMF*

dividers by @/adornedwithlight

Cover photo from Nightcrawler #1 (2014)

[discodeerdiary]

There's a good reason why I try not to argue publicly with anyone under 18, and it's not that I think they're inherently stupid, it's not that I think their brains are "underdeveloped", it's not that I think they can "do no wrong", it's that I never know how much freedom they actually have to think freely, or how many of their opinions are actually their own. Of course, under-18s *can be* capable of thinking for themselves and developing their own opinions, but (here in the US at least) law and culture put a lot of roadblocks on their ability to do so.

Of course parents and teachers cannot actually control the inner thoughts of the children they wield power over, but they can restrict the information that they have access to, can punish them for saying the wrong things, can cut them off from healthy diverse social groups, and can convince the child their thoughts are being monitored through religion, psychology, and other appeals to higher authority.

Thus if a random teenager says some headass shit in my mentions I have no way of knowing if these are opinions they arrived at on their own, or if they are dogmas forced on them by the people holding food and shelter over their head. If it's the latter, there's nothing to be gained from a public confrontation: people are generally unwilling to change their opinions in a direction that threatens their social support system, and they are especially unwilling to do so at the behest of an internet stranger who cannot offer alternative forms of support. If a teen is genuinely curious about my opinion (that is *if they consent* to a discussion of disagreements) and if I have the mental bandwidth for a potentially emotionally loaded conversation, yeah I'll have it, but I'm not gonna maintain any illusions about my ability to change their mind until they can find a way to live independently.

This is also why my leniency toward the not-yet-adult tends to also extend to the recently-adult. Coming up with a system of beliefs that you're actually willing to stand behind? Shit takes time, and I'm not necessarily gonna expect it of a 20-year-old who may, for all I know, have been living under conditions of near-absolute control up until their 18th birthday. Sure they may be opening their mind in college, or college may be their parents way of keeping them too occupied with busywork to develop new opinions, as they continue to hold financial support over their head. It's around their mid-twenties that I'm willing to go full gloves-off antagonistic with strangers, knowing that they've had a few years of legal and social adulthood under their belt, and that even if they're still financially dependent on their parents it's a different sort of dependence, one where they're given default legal permission to run away from home.

A lot of people are deeply uncomfortable with this line of thinking because if you look too far into the factors that influence young people's thoughts, you eventually have to start asking yourself which forces of dependency are influencing your own beliefs and opinions. Yeah, as an independent adult you may have the option to quit your job, divorce your spouse, ditch your friends, move to another country, but realistically how many of these can you accomplish at the same time? How many do you even want to? And how are all of these forces *in aggregate* setting the acceptable limits of what you're allowed to think and feel? It can be upsetting to think of yourself this way, it can be easier to think of yourself as a true free thinker and children as mindless automatons, but I urge you to think of mentally coercive environments as a continuum rather than a binary. The point is not to free yourself from all influence, but to gain the ability to see yourself as an influenced mind, and to have compassion for those dealing with all the bullshit you don't have to anymore.

[lawofangie]

the law is always working

i get so many questions about why the law isn't working for people, and i've come to the conclusion that there is something you all aren't understanding.

the law of assumption is a law. a law that states that whatever you assume to be true will be true. the law of assumption, like i've said many times before, requires you to assume.

to many of you, an assumption is hoping something happens or constantly checking to see if something is true. what you fail to understand is that by definition, an assumption is something you believe to be true without proof.

a law that states "whatever you assume to be true will be true" clealy requires you to assume first, otherwise, you're not even using it. you have to wholeheartedly believe that whatever you decided to believe is the truth.

this is not a foreign concept, it's something we do all the time. we believe in things and decide things are a certain way without seeing them all the time. you just don't realize it.

when you say "the law isn't working for me", what you're actually saying is "i haven't been assuming good for myself" or "i'm waiting for something to happen but nothing is" because again, all the law simply does is require you to assume. you can assume something good, bad or indifferent. the law doesn't care. WE care, which is why we're telling you, regardless of what your eyes are currently being shown, to assume in your favor.

and you have to believe it first before you get the proof. that's the way the law works. that's literally the only rule, the only requirement, the only way to even say you've been using the law and you're allowed to bend it however you want. just believe something, i promise you it's not as hard as you make it seem. you just like being told what to do instead of deciding things for yourself.

your assumption has to be true, has to materialize, no matter what. it's a law. it has to happen. there are no what-if's, no exceptions, no delays, because they're all decisions you're making anyway. if you decide "this won't happen", it is no different from deciding "this already did happen", the only difference is your personal choice on what you choose to assume. the law isn't going to congratulate you for making a good or bad choice.. it never has (again, the law is simply making assumptions, just used in a different way.), nobody is going to reward you for it, you're simply just making a good decision for yourself.

there is absolutely nothing stopping you from turning your life into a hell or a heaven. our words are just mere suggestions. it's always your decision in the end.

and i know circumstances can be scary, but nobody can coddle you or help you but you. you are valid, but no amount of dwelling on the present/ current circumstances can help you. dwelling on these things keeps them alive in your mind, thus keeping them alive in your external reality.

you have to stop putting your external reality above you and stop accepting it as absolute, again, accepting it as absolute is your decision. it is not the truth, you only feel it is the truth. there is nothing physically stopping you from doing the opposite.

so, if you want the change, you have to be the change.

[ceilidho]

This is in no way of hating but i want to know why do you enjoy writing noncon/rape? When I first downloaded tumblr which was couple of months ago i was surprised by the amount of noncon fics here. I eventually came to enjoy them which makes me question myself. Whenever i read a noncon fic and enjoy it i feel like im betraying women who actually went through those traumatic events. Plus I actually don't really like dark romance books? I love cod dead dove and that is mainly because i really love the characters and the authors are so talented. I rambled so much and i hope you don't get this in the wrong way i don't mean to hate AT ALL i love the stuff you write. Maybe i shouldn't think too much and let myself enjoy what im reading lol

first of all, no worries! i wasn't sure about your tone/intentions at first, but by the end i was totally fine with the question.

i actually don't mind talking about this stuff - i just sometimes avoid it on main because i prefer chatting about it privately.

second, i'm no psychologist or sociologist, so i probably won't be able to give you the most satisfactory answer, but i think there are a lot of different reasons. i can only name a few. one thing i should mention right off the bat is that rape fantasies are very normal (and this is true whether you're a survivor of SA or not) and writing/reading fiction can be a safe way to process those thoughts/feelings.

one of prevailing reasons is, of course, that many survivors of SA use noncon/dubcon literature/art as a way of processing their experiences and taking ownership of their trauma.

and look, people are going to go back and forth on this point (i've seen it all before - many people refuse to believe that engaging with noncon lit/art is helpful, and in fairness, it's NOT helpful for everyone because every person is different), but at the end of the day, if a survivor tells you "writing/reading this was helpful in my recovery" then that's that!

additionally, for many women and non-binary folk (i can only speak as a cis woman, but i'm sure this is a shared lived experience across many different people), we're also taught from a very young age to suppress our sexual desires / that being open about our sexuality is morally reprehensible and shameful. and a lot of people carry that shame for years, impacting them well into adulthood. so dubcon/noncon fantasies can be a way of being able to enjoy sexual scenarios where you don't have to be the initiator, thus taking away some of the emotional weight and shame.

plus, at the end of the day (and im sure many people will disagree with this take, it's something that i'm still figuring out myself), there is a kind of weird underlying consent implicit in dark fics. like, you might be reading a fic or novel that's ostensibly noncon, but you're also actively seeking out that literature (hopefully it's not just sprung on you - i do very much agree with tagging to the fullest extent and my lukewarm take is that I think all books, even traditionally published ones, should come with content/trigger warnings too).

there are a medley of reasons why someone might write or read dark fiction/dark romance. again, i'm just one person and i can only speak from my own experience!

i think at the end of the day, the important thing to realize is that fiction is fake, and as long as the writer appropriately tags their work and ensures that the audience is aware of what they're getting into when they start reading, they're not coercing the reader into something they aren't prepared for.

and it's totally fine if you have limits (like, you can read and enjoy dubcon, but not noncon) or can't engage with the material at all, but it's also unfair to say that it reflects someone's real life values - the same way that we don't say that the people who enjoy crime fiction must love murder.

and the last thing i want to say because this got a bit out of hand lol, is that, yes, for some people dark fiction is genuinely harmful, whether or not they're a survivor. it's not for everyone and that's completely fine and i'm aware of that, which is why i agree that you should tag as much as possible (even if you feel like you're overdoing it sometimes), but someone else's discomfort doesn't give them the right to tell you how to process your own emotions/experiences/desires/etc.

as long as no one's getting hurt, there's no issue as far as i'm concerned. and sorry but, no one's getting hurt by reading a fic or a novel unless the author didn't give proper content warnings - if you "forgot" to read the tags or read anyway DESPITE being warned, im sorry but that's life.

[fishtrouts]

I'm noticing something interesting about Swordfish, and what I noticed seems to tie into the recent lore you've revealed about Avoryx and what she believes Hopper is going to end up doing someday. (The whole eating all her friends and terrorizing the countryside thing.)

It seems plain to me that Swordfish doesn't value material things, and instead is fascinated with the living, breathing creatures of the world. Hopper contrasts by loving all things associated with being a 'true' dragon such as material wealth and magical artifacts. All I've done thus far is state the obvious, but here's my actual point:

Could Swordfish's destiny be to right the wrong that is Avoryx's legacy of avarice, murder, and cruelty, by showing Hopper (even if Swordfish's curiosity and interest in the smaller, ordinary fauna of the world is childish now and not rooted in any kind of 'personal philosophy') that there are things to value other than hoarding inert trinkets, that the little wonders of living are worth cherishing and guarding too?

WOW!!! I very much enjoyed reading this analysis! It's such a joy when my silly comics invoke deeper thoughts and theories like this. Both Swordfish and Hopper are a part of me and my experiences, so many of their adventures are directly or indirectly inspired from my life. And many times I don't realize these parallels myself. Sometimes I just draw and write what I subconsciously know, but don't acknowledge to myself out loud. How parents, siblings, friends can affect you, shape your future etc. How every generation is hopefully better than the last. Your take is absolutely correct in that Swordfish's influence could change Hopper's future, but in the end it's Hopper who makes the choices. She admires her mother so much that she might be blinded to paths other than the traditional dragon tyranny.

But they're just hatchlings atm, so nobody knows what the future holds :P

[waokevale]

The Overlapped AU [Aka Superhumans disguisted as Dinner Theater workers]

The Owners

The Managers (Engineer & the HR person)

The Waiters

The Security

The Performers (Wes is mostly on cleaning duty though)

The Kitchen staff (the others are usually tasked to help, though very few are actually trusted at all times to be there)

The Bartender and the Host

The Dishwashers

The Clerk & The Supplier

So this AU came to me upon a dream, and I just had to make it real...

The synopsis below:

The event of April 17th 1906 does happen, however instead of Charlie and Maxwell being kidnapped into the Constant, the Constant overlaps with the real world and spreads itself onto Earth.

Charlie and Maxwell in the process become corrupted and have to hide away temporarily. Both of them soon began to hear strange voices, source of which neither is quite sure, telling them, compelling them to hide the corruption's effect from the publicity, for the time being.

They come to a mutual realization they have to fix this mess somehow and hunt down any and all corrupted by the tome, by any means necessary.

(Maxwell still has codex umbra, but it is sealed shut for the time being until he's sure it won't spread more if Their influence. )

But the corruption didn't just appear out of nowhere, it's been leaking way long before Maxwell found the Codex, if to a less prominent extent.

Thus, in few years passing, they form a Dinner Theater, a rather inconspicuous establishment from the first glance. Very quickly they began "hiring" employees, which in reality means tracking down and blackmailing those who have been corrupted but not fully lost themselves to its effects, in order to hunt those who had.

Winona was against the idea at first, as she found out. But seeing the effects of corruption first hand, she quickly had a change of heart and integrated herself into Charlie's new environment.

Eventually they gathered a rather generous amount of people. Once a person's proven to be trustworthy to a point, they're give higher positions in the company.

However those who aren't, are likely to be shunned or "fired" which...you could probably guess what that means.

Many of these people gradually come to terms with the reality of their situation and accept their newfound purpose, being thankful that at least they still have a roof over their head and a warm meal, instead of being viewed as monsters or outcasts to the greater society.

(Wilson though, can't quite accept this notion. He keeps claiming that "this is just a big misunderstanding, I'm just a normal guy!" Yet the truth could be far from it.)

When Maxwell and Charlie hear of the danger looming, they immediately inform their "staff" of the matter. Those who are more experienced in combat come along to face whatever opponent may cross them, while those who aren't, stay behind, to be an additional aid or a medic in case the battle gets too intense.

Whenever any suspicion arises in the town about the shady business going on in that particular building, the two owners alongside their employees practically gaslight anyone and everyone into believing they're but the most regular entertainment center.

The characters who have either willingly or unwillingly lost their humanity, mostly in the physical sense, are given special devices constructed of Thulecite and bits of nightmare fuel (made by Winona, Wicker and the main two), which effectively hide away their true identity, or surpress the effects of their ailment.

There's also a few other people important to this story, especially the One, which even Charlie and Maxwell refer to as "The Boss", though what many most recent hires don't know, is that there's someone who's in a position much higher than the owners themselves, controlling their every move.

Correlating to that, another person, or rather, a set of people per se, working for a much different cause. Though most of them are "people" in only a visual sense of the word.

And while, there might be someone inside the well-known around town diner, who just might be more than what appears on the surface, literally and metaphorically this time.

__________

If you're interested to learn more about this AU, do let me know. If you have any questions, I'm happy to hear and answer them!

[dvilsdesire-a]

// Unless there is some form of being sworn to secrecy when entering Raphael's House of Hope, Haarlep is not a secret.

Both the Archivist and Nubaldin point you in the direction of the boudoir, telling you that the true pleasures of the HoH is within the boudoir (meaning Haarlep as we encounter them).

(sorry had to get the Archivist off YT cause apparently I didn't save my vids of him?)

It also is a pretty big indication that Haarlep gets visitors from time to time and is allowed to share pleasures with them. And that there's a secret way in (lol yeah big secret a whole open balcony lol), which means others have likely used that path if they can't get an invite.

Raphael also has personal visits within the boudoir logged in his logbook:

Obviously, as the player, we nab the High Inquisitor's invitation, but there are clearly other guests that are allowed to venture into the boudoir. While my little personal hc is that Raphael likely has an office somewhere he could talk to people about work/contracts/all that serious business, I'm assuming in game the boudoir is ALSO Raphael's office.

Either way, Haarlep has likely been lounging about during some of these visits. He's literally called the "resident of the boudoir", meaning that's pretty much Haarlep's home. There's always the indication that they venture off when it's something more serious, but I really can't see Haarlep being seen as some secret that no one knows about. They might be bound to the HoH, but they're not a secret. And why would Raphael hide Haarlep anyway when he thinks so highly of himself? If anything, Raphael would show off his prized sex toy, his beautiful incubus that takes on his glamour.

The Archivist also gives the indication that what happens in the boudoir is pretty intense (as we all figured), when you come back to him and he says you're still in one piece. Unfortunately, I don't have the vid, but you can talk to him again, and he says basically along the lines of you're either stronger than you look or haven't been to the boudoir yet.

I recall seeing somewhere that there was the possibility that the boudoir wasn't Raphael's actual bedroom as well but uh... I'm about to debunk that with this lovely little screenshot I took:

That, my friends, is indeed, Raphael's bed.

So from this, we can pretty much gather that Haarlep lives in the bedroom (as he's the resident), it's legitimately Raphael's bedroom (even tho it's called the boudoir and holds private social meetings as much as pleasurable ones), and that others visit Haarlp and Raphael within the room.

Thus, I'm concluding that Haarlep is not a secret. Though they may be bound and the resident of the boudoir (although the fact that once you've encountered him, he legit disappears and can't be found says otherwise), there's no way that the incubus is a secret. Devils also talk, so even if Haarlep was supposed to be, I doubt that it's been kept within the HoH.

Haarlep is basically a big house pet (spy from Daddy).

[capricorn-0mnikorn]

How much of our scientific thinking has an unconscious religious bias?

This is in response to this post, from @headspace-hotel, about campaigns to eradicate Hybrid Cattails as an "Invasive Species," even though both individual species hybridizing themselves are native plants (But I didn't want to muddy a discussion about science with a rant about religion. So: a separate post it is)

I sometimes wonder if our dominant views of "natural vs. unnatural/invasive" were shaped, are shaped, by the particular theologies of Protestant Christianity...

You Know, the theology that teaches / believes:

Our world was created by a single, all-knowing god

Humanity Fell by disobeying that god, and thus tainted the world with Sin (so Humans are now apart from Nature [aka the Garden of Eden])

The Protestant Christians fetishized the North American Continent as an example of what Eden was like "Before the Fall," and the people who were already living here were Noble Savages.*

So now, anything that evolves in response to human influence (such as brackish cattails hybridizing with freshwater cattails), is considered "unnatural," as if it's been tainted by our sin.

I sometimes wonder what our environmental understanding would be like in an alternate universe where the sciences had evolved in a polytheistic culture.** Would we be more generally accepting of the idea of coexisting forces constantly intertwining, and changing, rather than there being a single, fixed, "pure" world, that must be protected from contamination?

[BTW. I've become an atheist in this last third of my life, so I don't think any one religion is "more true" than any other: they're all metaphors that help us frame and understand the actual world we live in; they are very powerful metaphors, and for some, can be helpful and emotionally healthy ... for others, not so much.]

*(even though the abundant environment the colonizers found here was actually deliberately managed and curated by humans -- it's just that it wasn't managed in the form of fenced off square plots, and straight rows of crops).

**If you don't believe scientific thinking can evolve within a polytheistic paradigm, check out (what survives of) the writings of Democritus and Epicurus. Their philosophies weren't following what we now consider the Scientific Method, but they were already drifting in that direction.

[thewertsearch]

EB: but in the end, you did it to help me, didn't you? EB: really, i should probably be thanking you! EB: uh… EB: are you there? AG: Yes, I am here. AG: Sorry, I wasn't sure what to say for a moment. AG: I am just so incredi8ly relieved you are not angry with me.

This is probably the first time anyone's ever appreciated Vriska’s 'help'.

She's used to (justified) hostility from the trolls. The idea that John would thank her is as alien to her as he is. She can barely comprehend it.

AG: I don't know, John. You'd 8e surprised how often people resent it when you try to help them! AG: 8ut see, you really get it. That's why you're special.

Well, hang on a second, Vriska.

Tavros resented you for a good fucking reason. Things aren't different because John's 'special', they're different because you're actively treating him better than your last apprentice.

Vriska enjoyed torturing Tavros. Maybe she did think she was ‘helping’ him, but she also knew it was a miserable experience for the guy. There was an undertone of sadism to it that can't be denied, no matter what her true intentions were.

Contrast this with John, who she killed painlessly in his sleep. She didn't torment him, she didn't gloat or insult him, and she went out of her way to make his death as comfortable as possible. Unlike Tavros, Vriska actually cares about John's well-being, and that's why he's more receptive.

John's thankful because he can tell that Vriska cares, and Tavros resented her 'training' because he knew she didn't. Does she really not grok the difference?

AG: I know how this is pro8a8ly going to sound, especially to a human. AG: 8ut I just killed someone.

And I think you’re having some very unwelcome feelings about it.

Just what is happening to you, Vriska?

AG: He was a friend. AG: Someone from our team. […] AG: The truth is I killed him 8ecause at the time, I thought I wanted to, and sort of felt like I finally had to.

I think you killed him because that's what you're trained for. Years of FLARPing with Terezi has trained you to deal with problematic trolls decisively and violently, and years of feeding your lusus has taught you that being a murderer is what defines you. From multiple directions at once, your instincts were screaming that it was time for Tavros to die.

And yet... you're saying you thought you had to kill him. You're not sure anymore - and thus, a small crack begins to form in your worldview.

Vriska Serket is beginning to change.