#and thought of lupe and esti

[a-lesbianshadowinthenight]

this turned out way sadder than i expected

lupesti: to be seen

[alotogifs]

#i think a lot of ppl just go. shes annoyed with esti. she hates esti. she doesnt want to parent esti. but theres more to it imo. #also possibly another level #is that she wants esti to room with the other girls so she cant rely purely on her spanish #and will have to practise her english which lupe wants her to do for the same above reasons #and for her own safety in the US (op's tags)

i actually think the main reason as to why lupe was annoyed at the idea of rooming with esti again on the bus is because so far the entire season shes been ostracised and not had the chance to connect with the other girls and when we see everyone that night theyre all getting to know eachother on a deeper connection which shes missing out on

[theresstillgrowinghere]

I don’t know if I have it in me to write a decent enough AU right now, but the phrase “EMS Jess” has entered my brain and refuses to leave. Picturing Esti dragging Lupe to a concert or festival, and Lupe slips/falls/gets caught in the wrong way that absolutely fucks with her old elbow injury. She tries to hide/push through the pain, but it’s not only quite painful but also pretty panic-inducing in terms of her career as a ball player. So she goes to the EMS tent with hopes of ice or a sling or honestly just some reassurance from a medical professional. But soon after she gets there, every thought about in her head about her injury gets overshadowed by the blonde butch paramedic who Lupe is pretty sure is flirting with her

Lupe leaves with ice and a sling but disappointingly no number or plans to see her again. But she knows very well about professional boundaries so she’s not surprised, just preoccupied by the thoughts of crossing paths again in a more neutral environment

Towards the end of the night, Lupe goes to smoke, and Jess approaches her, bag of ice in hand. “Thought maybe you could use a refill.”

Lupe raises an eyebrow. “You give all your patients such good follow up care?”

Jess laughs. “No, nah, not usually. Usually we hope we never see our patients again, you know, for their wellbeing.”

“Ah right,” Lupe says between drags. “But there are unusual circumstances?”

“Sure,” Jess smirks with a teasing lilt in her voice. “If Fire gets called for someone’s cat stuck in a tree, we might follow up to make sure the family didn’t suffer catastrophic injury from all the stress. Or to see if they need a number for a good vet.”

“I see.” Lupe nods slowly. “Well, thankfully there’s no catastrophic injury here, but you know, come to think of it, there might be a number I need.”

Jess grins. “Oh yeah? That’s great news because the vet has really been pushing for more referrals.”

Lupe groans and rolls her eyes, but Jess is already pulling out her phone and handing it to Lupe to put in her number. “First drink’s on me for the bad joke.”

“Oh absolutely, at least the first two.”

Jess chuckles. “Fair enough.”

Lupe hands the phone back. “But I’ll get the one after that as a thank you for the luxury of fresh ice and a generous follow up.”

“Deal.” Jess bumps Lupe’s shoulder lightly. “Well, I gotta go help wrap things up, but” - she throws Lupe a wink - “See you soon, Lu.”

[youmearepeaches]

I’ve just read a post about Esti having fun and the peaches including her and laughing together during the first episodes, even thought the language barrier. And I’m very confused because I didn’t perceived that at all. 

In fact, I don’t think we see anyone talking/interacting with Esti in the first few episodes. Except Lupe (because of the language), Greta (to invite her to night practice) and Jess (howling together into the night and codito codito at night practice). And sure, we see her smiling while night/morning practices but we also see Shirley kind of dismissing her while they ride the bikes. And we see her sad as soon as episode 3, first because they got her name wrong on the check, and second when she tries to bond with Lupe over a letter written in Spanish and Lupe shuts her up and is being a bitch to he.

Then there’s that night scene when Lupe confronts her about night practices. I’ve always perceived that scene with Maybelle, Jo and Terri as them laughing at Esti, not with her. Like that bit when we get Maybelle, Jo and Terri on the front and Lupe and Esti looking at them? It didn’t feel like just about night practices but also about language/cultural barrier.  

And I might be projecting here? But that feeling when you realise they’re not laughing with you but AT you, and that they’re using you just because you talk a different language and that can be “exotic” and “funny” to some people for a bit, it’s devastating. And I feel that’s also the moment Esti kind of realises where she is and that she’s completely alone (because who she thought was gonna help her out -Lupe- ignores her most of the time).

[ukulelekatie]

re: the fanfic lore post—how did you decide which pieces of clothing to highlight in your recent fic? I loved them!

Ahh thank you!!

(Spoilers ahead for my fic Cardigans & Collegiality)

For Carson and Greta, I knew I wanted to play up the red/green color scheme. Carson’s sweater was specifically the one she wears in the beginning of episode 4. Greta’s red cardigan ended up being a bit of a Mandela effect, I could have sworn she had one but I looked back at all her outfits and couldn’t find anything that suggested she did lol

The others took a little more thought and some help from friends. Like several of my stories, this one started with me throwing a half-baked prompt into a discord chat and discussing it until someone shouts “KATIE WRITE THE THING”, so several of the clothing pieces were adapted specifically from that chat!

With Esti and Lupe, I loved the idea of Esti misguidedly trying to help Lupe follow the hip new fashion trends the youths are following these days, but not quite grasping that Lupe dresses the way she does for a reason, not because she’s unaware of what’s in style.

I also wanted to highlight the body diversity of the characters, which is where the bit about Jo and the shoes came in. As a larger person myself, shoes and accessories are the easiest articles of clothing to share with my smaller friends, so I wanted to make sure to include something along those lines for her.

Jess and Lupe’s swaps were an opportunity to make commentary on how their experience differs from Greta’s. As butches, they (and Jo) stick out from the group, but find safety and solidarity in each other. For Jess, wearing pants is already a wardrobe violation in the League. It’s a double-edged sword in a way, she figures that people are more likely to notice that she’s wearing pants than to notice that they’re Lupe’s.

Also, the cap swapping ritual was just a fun little detail I wanted to include! I think I might try to work it into a future fic as well.

The part about Jess wearing Lupe’s skirt was a really sweet suggestion from diamonds_and_dynamite, my number one jesslupe consultant. There’s something really endearing about Jess being uncomfortable with skirts and dresses but the one exception being an item she got from Lupe, especially one she can use as protection from the shitty no pants rule.

And then of course, Maybelle wearing Jo’s shirt as pajamas was a little nod to jobelle as a ship, which I think is such a fun pairing! I was aiming for the suggestion that this is maybe something they’ve been doing all along in secret since they have the privilege of being roommates, and that Greta’s idea provided them with an alibi to be a little more open about it.

Thanks for reading!

[merelypeachy]

hi!! did you hear about the season 2 news? what are your thoughts?? love your writing <33

OMG I DID NOT??? i just looked it up and i am so excitedd even if it is going to be apparently only four episodes (which is a bit short but they better be going for quality over quantity). honestly, tho, as long as i get to see more of lupe, jess, and esti together, i’ll be satisfied bc i absolutely adore their relationship

and thank you so much! <3

[ray-vnn]

Watching aloto in Spanish

Episodes 1 and 2

Some other thoughts x xx

Lupe’s letter Eng and Esp

Idk how to format stuff here and am too useless, but here, have my notes on the Spanish dub for episode 3:

Something funny, or interesting given that I see no reason for it, is that to work around the fact that Lupe speaks English and Spanish they swapped English for Italian. So since the “main” language is Spanish and everyone speaks it, they had to give her another one for her telling Esti to mind her business and Maybelle asking for that “I’m a happy lady” line. Hope there’s a reason somewhere for it being Italian lol so instead of saying “soy una mensa” (I’m an idiot/stupid) she says “sono una merda” which according to google means ‘ I’m a shit ’

The Shellfish wordplay. This one was weird 😭 I kind of get it, I think. But it doesn’t make A LOT of sense. Ok so, In English it says ‘shellfish’ bc they were talking about the clam with the machine gun, right? So it’s about sea animals or whatever, I’m an engineer not biologist🥲 Now, in the dubbing it doesn’t really make for a wordplay with those words. Bc Shellfish and selfish are pretty similar. But in Spanish Shellfish is ‘mariscos/moluscos’ and selfish is ‘egoísta’ so not much to go by, right? Right. Instead they use the word ‘Protagonista’ (protagonist) which wreaking my brain, I’ve come to the conclusion that it tries to play with the fact that Stars (like yk famous people AND constellations) are pretty much as close to a protagonist as one can get. So Greta kinda says ‘you’re a Protagonist’ instead of ‘plain old shellfish’.

THE BEST ONE, me thinks: Greta’s date after the whole “I’m normal” fiasco. So when Greta asks Vernon what he does when he’s not watching her play and yk Carson says “Well I’m sure he does a lot of things bc the world does not revolve around you” (shut up Carson, it absolutely does 😭) Greta nonchalantly answers “I’m so excited to find out from him, though” a bit aggressive but just like friendly banter right? WELL in Spanish this gorgeous gorgeous woman fires back to Carson “AMIGA, me encantaría que me lo dijera él mismo” which translates to “Friend, I would love to find out from him” not that different but that “friend” makes it so much heavier after Carson says she wants to be just friends. A BURN (in my book, at least).

The one that hurt me in the end: Max and Toni. That scene where Max tells Toni she got a job at the factory and then says that’s the only way she can get to play baseball and that she HAS a gift. And if she isn’t meant to play why would God give her that? Well, in English. she just says “I have a gift”. Like just a fact. In Spanish, though, she says “Tengo un don y lo sabes” (I have a gift and you know it). The part that hurt me about that is that she says “you know it”. She voices (and lets us know) that her mom knowssss that she’s really good at baseball. But she won’t accept that it’s something her daughter wants. And Toni doesn’t say anything. She just leaves. I swear every time I watch that scene I can hear Max calling after her mom. And it makes me so sad and want to hug her so tight.

This dub is really growing on me and since I need as much ALOTO content as I can get my hands on, I’ll keep doing it. Lol.

As a side note, I said that I didn’t quite like Dove referring to the team as ‘fruits’ in Spanish (episode 2). And he keeps doing it throughout episode 3. In fact, everyone does and I don’t like it. It feels like an invasion of privacy.

(Also, maybe I’m wrong but Priscilla’s voice sounds a liiiittle different. Maybe she’s not trying the Cuban accent as much as in the original)

[thecompetition]

cackling as a response to my own genius

[oh-jail-for-mother]

LET'S TALK ABOUT ESTI. THIS IS HER FACE WHEN SHE MET LUPE, THINKING SHE FOUND HER BLESSING. THIS IS THE KID THEY DID NOT TAKE TO THE MOVIES. LOOK AT HER. SHE IS ONLY A BABY AND SHE HAD TO GROW UP SO FAST BECAUSE EVERYONE MADE HER FEEL SO OLD OKAY NOW I'M HAVING A BREAKDOWN

[somethingclever666]

I just finished league of their own and god if you haven’t seen it PLEASE DO!!! It’s so incredibly good and it’s probably my fav show now!! Apologies in advance because I most definitely will be spamming about it!!

[7central]

I just love the different ways that aloto approaches queerness and parenthood.

Toni recognizes Max’s queerness and fears it, but mostly she fears her daughter being hurt in the way that she’s undoubtedly seen happen to Bertie.  The core of their conflict being that she wants to provide for Max, since she’s a pillar in her community and she provides for everyone, at the salon, ushering at church, being motherly towards people like Clance who need it.  She does like Max as well as love her, but she can’t see Max living a future with the way she is, so she wants her to change all the same.  It’s such a realistic conflict with so much urgency in the time (and now too).  Edgar is much more accepting of Max’s reality because he didn’t experience losing Bertie the way that Toni did, and his family has been settled in Rockford for much longer, so he’s farther removed from the immediate need to establish himself in the community the way that Toni has.  Toni, on the other hand, knows how hard it is for Black women, and she knows how much more dangerous it is for people who are gender non-conforming and queer.  On the flip side of the coin, there’s Bertie and Gracie, who are pillars in their own community, who bring Max in and encourage her to learn of the world beyond Toni’s sphere.  All of them love Max, but none of them can tell her who she is.

For Lupe, motherhood is a complicated obligation.  We see her sending money home, so there’s someone she’s providing for, but we never find out who exactly that is to her.  From what she tells Esti, her family intervened and took her daughter from her because they thought she would be a bad influence in some way.  Bad influence in that she was a young, single mother?  That she was queer?  Something else entirely?  It’s not clear.  But whatever it was, Lupe recognizes, and regrets to an extent, that she has benefitted from being relieved of the responsibility of motherhood.  So when she’s forced back into a caretaker position, expected to meet all of Esti’s needs because she is the only one who can communicate with her, she resists.  It’s cruel, yes, to contribute more directly in Esti’s exclusion, while the others do it carelessly, out of ignorance and lack of effort.  But it’s an understandable response to the unfair expectations placed on her, especially given that she’s harshly scrutinized by her teammates and subjected to casual racism on a daily basis.  That’s not even getting into the ways that Esti reminds her of her daughter, and of the youth that she herself was denied, having a child at that age.  It’s all been denied to her, because, in letting go of her daughter, she lost all claim to those feelings.  In deciding to go find Esti, deciding to open up to her about it, she gets just a little bit of that back.  Her motherhood is inextricable to who she is, and so is her queerness, and so is baseball.  She’s never been allowed to have all three.  And opening up about it doesn’t fix that, but it’s something.  Esti’s forgiveness is something that Lupe rarely receives, but constantly gives.  And forgiveness is something we constantly deny mothers who give up their children.

Carson’s sister immediately mentions the absence of their mother on the phone and half-accuses her of leaving Charlie.  It’s not until later that we find out that Carson’s mother left when she was young, probably forcing her sister into that motherly role.  Carson clearly misses her mom, maybe idealizes her more than you’d expect from a kid who was abandoned.  I don’t know if Carson ever realizes it fully, but I think she takes comfort in knowing that, even if her sister and husband are disappointed about her running off to play pro ball, putting off having children for it, her mother would probably be proud of her decision.  Charlie’s accusation that “whatever made your mother leave is in you,” is heavy with the implication that her mother was queer.  That it was selfish to choose that over her family.  And it was.  But Carson decides to do it, too, because the newfound sense of self she has is more than any of the stability or love that her husband could give her.  In a way, it’s just the same as Greta confiding that she’d like to have children but could never put herself through commitment to a man.  I think a part of Carson knew that about her mother all along, which is why she shows such an unexpected amount of grace about being left behind.

It’s just so intense to see these different ways that queerness intersects with and complicates parenthood, especially in this time period, when the expectation of women to become mothers was even more prevalent than it is now.  The strangeness of having so many men off at war is enough to shift the perception just slightly enough for something like the League to exist, but it’s all about to snap back like a rubber band during the baby boom to come.

[a-lesbianshadowinthenight]

i don’t think this scene will ever stop emotionally obliterating me. there’s so much that builds up to this moment, you can almost see the moment lupe knows that she has to talk about it, and you can see how painful it is, how it’s still painful to think about her daughter, so much so that she pushes away and dismisses esti because she reminds lupe of her.

in the earlier car scene, before esti crashes, it’s like lupe finally sees how much she’s been contributing to esti feeling alone, that it’s been hurting her. she seems surprised to even learn that esti just turned 17, and you can see the moment it clicks for her. she could have been thinking about herself at 17—how much she needed someone the way she could have been there for esti. but it was too painful for her, it might have felt easier to pretend she didn’t care, to keep her distance, to hide away her pain behind anger.

but she realises the impact that it’s had, how esti had to grow up too fast just like she did, but she’s still a kid who just wanted to feel less alone. who saw lupe and thought lupe would be just as excited to have someone on the team who speaks spanish. except she ends up feeling more alone because lupe brushes her off time and time again, even when esti is trying to help her.

“it’s like seeing her and not seeing her.” is the most gut wrenching line—she’s reminded of alma but simultaneously reminded that she can’t see her. having that reminder be constantly present would have been hard to handle, how difficult it must have been, to be expected to care for and be the sole person responsible for esti when she was told by her parents that she would screw up her own kid, when esti’s a reminder of that child that got taken away.

the way lupe looks at her kills me, because it’s like she finally lets herself feel the pain of it, without the anger, without the defence mechanisms that she normally uses to disguise it.

then esti hugs her and lupe doesn’t expect it but she realises how much she needed it. it shifts something, because she immediately jumps into caring mode when esti is cold, and you see so clearly the change in their dynamic. the start teaming up with each other, lupe looking at esti like a proud dad when she does her pep talk.

anyways, this scene is as beautiful as it is devastating, and i think just a really important moment for both lupe and esti. roberta and priscilla’s acting is just perfect in this scene, they both have such good control of their micro expressions. roberta conveys such deep pain and sadness with very subtle facial acting, priscilla crushing your heart without a word of dialogue is mind blowing. i wish we got to see more of their dynamic as it changed

[anomyn]

[ID: a conversation between esti and lupe from a league of their own as their sitting on the ground next to a car outside. lupe, to break the silence, says, “I had a daughter. When I was your age. I was too young,” esti turns to look at her in surprise in response. lupe continues, “I didn’t have a partner. My parents thought if I raised her I would screw her up so...They took her from me. Well, really, I let them... because I knew that, with that freedom, I could finally escape... from everything. I haven’t seen her since then." esti looks down with a sad expression. lupe looks at esti and esti looks at lupe as lupe says, “You have her eyes. That’s why sometimes when I look at you... you don’t know how it makes me feel. It’s like seeing her and not seeing her.” esti moves to hug lupe as lupe looks very emotional. caption plaintext: Even if you don’t believe me, I do feel bad that you had to grow up so fast. I know how that is. A league of their own (2022-) Full count. 1.07. end ID]

EVEN IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME, I DO FEEL BAD THAT YOU HAD TO GROW UP SO FAST. I KNOW HOW THAT IS.

A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN (2022-) FULL COUNT | 1.07

[elizabeth-mitchells]

hold on hold on i'm having thoughts about Lupe and Jess, the butch duo, possibly the two team members most intensely passionate about baseball itself and winning, actually being the ones that are closest, most protective, nurturing, and kind to the youngest member of the team Esti

like, yes, everyone else should've done better, and Lupe had some stuff of her own to deal with first, but it's them, it's not the main characters, it's not the one who's actually a mom, it's not just anyone it's them

[youmearepeaches]

A little collage-birthday card for the JessLupe truthers server pride event. Prompt was birthday (click to enlarge!)

Lupe's birthday is approaching and she's been very explicit she doesn't want to celebrate or get any presents. Jess and Esti, shockingly, try to respect her wishes but they can't help themselves and make her something. They figure if it's something little that they make together, Lupe won't be too mad. So they combine their crafty skills and make her a birthday card using cuts from magazines and old birthday cards, and pictures of their faces Lupe has taken over the years (unfortunately, all Lupe's pictures they find are of her scowling, which is fitting anyway since this is how she feels about birthdays). Esti is very proud of their work and is convinced Lupe will love it right away. Jess knows she will pretend to hate it but will keep it in her especial things box. She's not very worried though, she knows Lupe will forget all about her birthday when she gives her the real present, when they're both alone in their bedroom. (When Esti asks why Jess is using random pictures, Jess says it's a secret message for Lupe. Esti looks at it for a long time and doesn't really understand the secret part, she thought everybody knew already?) Esti's message translation: Dear Lupe, Happy birthday! I know you didn't want any presents, but please don't be mad, it's rude not to give presents, even if it's just a card. We made it with Jess for you. It was my idea but Jess insisted in using that picture of your face, she says it's "hilarious". I hope you like it. I love you!

Edit: you can get a birthday card like this here <3

[moghedien]

Thinking about how Bev had to have known about the raid pretty soon after it happened to have arranged for Jo to get released and traded so early in the morning.

Meaning that at some point in the night after she heard about it, however that was, she would have probably gone and looked to see if all of the girls were there, and she would have found Jo gone, Lupe gone, Jess gone, Esti gone, maybe Carson and Greta gone depending on when they made it back to the house

Like if Bev wasn’t called by the police and told that they had Jo and only Jo, and she instead went and investigated herself, then she might have legit thought she lost half the girls in one night when she realized what happened