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captain-aralias · 5 years ago

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Hi, 1,7 and 22 from the fic asks please 💕💕💕

hooray! asks. these are some of the best ones too and it’s 11pm at night... basically, if you want to ask these questions again at the weekend, i will probably answer them better.

1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.

fake relationship, possibly outside of the main ship (that penny/baz prompt today has my name on it. i almost wrote this exact fake relationship into ‘keep calm’ to get the two of them to the cottage, but i removed it because i JUST NEEDED TO GET TO THE PLOT).

in ‘carry on’, my comfort zone is - something about vampires and how sad baz feels about being a vampire, it’ll be about 10k, and will alternate between only the two main characters. at some point someone will point out that baz is rich and maybe he should feel bad about that too. maybe our heroes will have sex.

i’ve said before that i find writing smut hard. i also find it easy, despite that being a contradiction, because you know what the fic is about - it gives it an easy, safe arc, a beginning and an end. so that is helpful - the problem is having to write the actual shagging.

17. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

i’m not a great prose stylist - i’m a writer of dialogue/i always wanted to be a playwright. i’m also pretty good at picking up an mimicking stylistic quirks. so you’ll see what i mean when i say, ‘carry on’ really plays to my strengths.

a few years earlier, i had a great time writing first-person fics in ‘blake’s 7′ fandom where there were basically none. it seemed incredibly frightening before i started (and i still never wrote blake first person, too scary), but actually i loved it.

if you like the things i write for baz, now, a lot of it is probably because i wrote this kind of thing for avon first:

I realised belatedly that Blake had asked this because the hand I'd left on the back of the sofa hadn't stayed where I'd left it. It had crept upwards, and twisted itself into Blake's hair. I must have been toying with his curls. He was right – I must be very drunk. More than I realised. I have no idea how long my hand had been there. I began to draw it back, but Blake seemed to follow it, though I were tugging him towards me, rather than releasing him. By the time my hand had returned to my lap, Blake was most of the way onto my side of the sofa. I opened my mouth to protest, and found myself pushed back by Blake's body as he kissed me. Blake kissed me. Blake kissed me.

I have no idea why he thought this would be welcome, or even whether he’d thought that far ahead. Until that point I had no idea he was attracted to me, or even that he was attracted to men. I am not attracted to men, and I'm certainly not attracted to Blake. He— That is— Well, I can see why some people – some women – might be attracted to him, but it's an objective observation. I can see why women might be attracted to me, and I'm not attracted to myself. Most of the time I don't even like myself. Most of the time I don't like Blake. I certainly don't like him – it's nothing personal. No, it is personal – the regular dislike is, the dislike formed around the fact that a dangerous maniac who endangers my life on a constant basis – but my disinterest in him sexually is not personal. I'd just never thought of him in that light before. Why would I?

So I have no idea why I kissed him back, clutching at his hair with the hands I'd only just managed to remove from his curls earlier.

- Roj Blake and Other Phobias (2015)

a lot of what i wrote for avon is unreliable narrator but very VERY obviously unreliable, so the audience is very in on the joke that he’s kidding himself. for thousands of words. (in this, he is not like baz, who at least knows himself.) this was really good fun, and i think it’s fun to read. i think this kiss is quite sexy (i cut it before we got to that part, but it is) and i also like... even though it’s a cheap device... that i played on quite a famous line for this pairing - have you betrayed me? have you betrayed me? both obviously at the end of the first paragraph, but at other points throughout the bit i quoted where avon tries to clean up after himself even inside his own head by (here) emphasising different bits of the sentence. or correcting himself to make sure he is completely understood...

and obviously he is completely lying.

22. Choose a passage from one of your earlier fics and edit it into your current writing style.

this is my favourite question from the meme. i don’t think i’ll do it justice.

i thought i’d go really early - because all the Blake stuff is still pretty much as i would write it (if not better).

this is one of the last Harry Potter fics i ever wrote: Enslaving Fireflies (2005).

May the first, 1972. “I’m not having any fun,” Peter said for the fifth time, lunging dangerously at another firefly that hovered five feet about his head and almost falling to his death. “Go inside then,” Sirius pointed out mercilessly, as he had done every time Peter had suggested that standing on a roof in the early hours of the morning trying to catch glowing insects was not quite as thrilling as James had made it seem inside the common room an hour ago. Peter scowled in his general direction, but stayed where he was. Sirius smirked and Remus rolled his eyes: after almost a year he, at least, had learnt that it was unwise to let Sirius know he’d won, even if Sirius already suspected as much. There was five minutes of silence and then Peter spoke again. “How many of these things do we need to catch?” “A hundred and fifty,” James informed him for the third time. “Thirty for will, twenty-five for you, fifteen for go, twenty for out, thirty-five for with and fifteen for me and ten for a question mark.” Peter considered this. “And how many do we have?” Remus lifted up the large glass jar that they had ‘borrowed’ from the kitchen that morning and which now held the product of the last hour’s work. “Four,” he said, seriously, “and I think this one’s dead, so that’s three.” “Only another forty-nine hours to go,” James said happily waving his net enthusiastically in the general direction of some more fireflies, “which means, minus the time we have to be in lessons, we should just be in time for her birthday.” Remus put down the jar and set to work again. Another five minutes passed and then Peter said, “I’m really, really not having any fun.”

i dont know if everyone else also had this phase, but at this time (and i was in university by this time - first year, but still) i had this crazy perception about how paragraphing worked. informed, admittedly, by reading books where this does happen.

anyway - the first thing i would do to this would be to put line breaks in between the dialogue.

i chose potter because i thought it would be fun to edit it into first person, given the above/it’s connection with ‘Carry On’... i don’t know if that’s the case, though. er...

1st May 1972 REMUS

We’ve only been at Hogwarts a few months, but I’ve already learned a lot. Like what a bezor is. How to get to the Shrieking Shack without waking up any of my roommates. And that if James Potter says something will be ‘fun’, you should be prepared for both pain and suffering.

“I’m not having any fun,” Peter says for the fifth time as he lunges for another firefly. It’s not the first time that he’s said this and it probably won’t be the last.

“Go inside then,” Sirius says (also not for the first time).

When Peter doesn’t, Sirius grins me - because of course, he knew Peter wouldn’t leave. But another thing I’ve learned is not to tell Sirius he’s right, even though - of course - he already knows he is. The gloating can last for hours.

etc

#my content #carry on

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blackcatanna · 5 years ago

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Playing Kazama's Route Because I Guess I Hate Myself Part 1: Kyoto Winds

So, I'm going to play through everybody's routes on Hakuoki and vent my feelings and frustrations on here! I've already done Saito and Iba but I will play them again soon, too. Next up is Kazama, mostly because I'm curious to find out if this fucker has any redeeming qualities. Maybe if you're into nonces. Idk.

Wow, I had forgotten how gloriously campy this intro is :') I love it so much!

Playing through the prologue because it sets the tone of blood, death and assholes. This game is much more violent, tragic and much less horny than I had predicted and I guess I'm into that.

Aw, Chizuru bae is so lonesome and vulnerable <3

Kodo flashback! HIIISSSSSSSSSS!!! >:(

Just taking a moment to appreciate how beautiful and romantic the nighttime environment and music is <3 At least, until people start getting slashed up X_X

OKAY GAME, WE GET IT: CHIZURU IS HORNY FOR HIJIKATA. GOD.

Okita is enjoying this waaay too much X_X

Chapter 1

WIGGLE WIGGLE WIGGLE

Thank you for untying me, InouBAE!

THEY'VE BEEN DISCUSSING THE SITUATION SINCE MORNING BUT NOBODY THOUGHT TO SUGGEST MAYBE NOT REVEALING MORE SENSITIVE INFORMATION WHILE I'M IN THE ROOM?! I'm surrounded by idiots -_-

Apparently, "They are all truly gentlemen." Uh-huh.

Hooray for Chizuru calling out Okita for being a douche. And Hijikata for calling everyone a bunch of kids! Where is the lie? :')

Um, why has the camera zoomed in on Nagakura's crotch? Chizuru, please control your thirst. This is a life or death situation.

Now Saito's telling Okita to stop being a prick and Okita's response is, "hehe." X_X

Casual suicide jokes... Reminds me of my friends at uni X_X

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE 8O I can't see how this could possibly backfire...

OMG Kondou describing not recognising a girl as "The shame of a lifetime!" XD

"Maybe it's time you spilled your guts, kid." Is he... Is he telling me to commit seppuku?! O_O "I looked at him and nodded." GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD.

Although, with Harada threatening to strip me, suicide doesn't look like such a bad option X_X Tell me, Inoue, WHERE ARE THESE GENTLEMEN YOU WERE TELLING ME ABOUT?!

Feminist Hijikata wants to kill me regardless of gender :') We stan a woke queen.

Feminist icon Sanan also thinks that gender is irrelevant but doesn't want to kill me because THEIR JOB IS LITERALLY TO PROTECT PEOPLE.

You search so hard for Kodo and he turns out to be such a treacherous snake :'(

Bad feminist Hijikata calls the Shinsengumi "sons of bitches" for feeding me to him as his page. The Shinsengumi are strong, independent bitches in their own right.

Escaping execution but being quietly upset about having to wear ugly boy clothes for the foreseeable future is a mood.

More of Hijikata threatening to cut off Okita's tongue, please!

What does Chizuru have against afternoon drinking :P Clearly she has never enjoyed a long glass of Pimm's on a warm Summer afternoon! I guess she is pretty young...

Hijikata isn't here so can I please sneak out with you guys instead of staring at the wall all day?

Reeeeeeally want to pick the yes to dressing like a girl option but apparently that's not what Daddy Nonce wants :( HE'S NOT EVEN SHOWN UP YET AND HE'S ALREADY RUINING MY FUN! >:(

Well, now we're literally running away from Nagakura and Inoue. I'm getting High School flashbacks.

Wait, why is Heisuke being weird about Saito being in my room? Did this happen last time too? Maybe I just forgot or maybe it's because I was hanging out with Heisuke and Harada before...

This dinner is terrifying.

Survival of the fittest? More like survival of the FATTEST! Amirite? Anyone? No? I'll stop.

Takeda admittedly has a point about you not earning your place in the Shinsengumi. And he has great hair. So I can almost forgive him for being a mega bitch.

"His swordsmanship is decent, BUT he is well read and possesses a cunning mind for military science." Not sure if a translation error or Hijikata just hates nerds?!

Does accompanying Hijikata as his page get me bonus Kazama Sexy Points purely because it pisses Hijikata off?

Chizuru once again being in mortal peril but getting distracted by Iba's beautiful face is relatable af.

"Takeda huffed smugly to himself and WADDLED out of the store." What a majestic image we have been blessed with :') The bitchiest penguin ever to waddle this Earth!

Iba happily munching his bean jelly is a MOOD.

Chapter 2

Okita telling you that you're here to keep him company on his rounds is exactly the kind of bullshit that I'd expect from him X_X

Guess I'm just running into a battle...

Oh, it's Kazama. Sitting on the windowsill like the edgy bastard he is.

Aaaand he just killed a guy on his own side. Classic edgelord move.

And apparently I have to thank him for this display if I want him to be my waifu.

Seemingly, Chizuru is thirsty for this slut and is being REALLY FRICKING OBVIOUS ABOUT IT X_X

OH HE DID NOT JUST CALL ME THE SHINSENGUMI'S BITCH. Although, it is somewhat accurate XD STILL A DICK MOVE AFTER I THANKED HIM SO NICELY, THOUGH.

AND HE SAYS THAT I HAVE MANNERS, BUT WHERE ARE YOUR FREAKING MANNERS, YOU EDGY THOT?!!!

I have a feeling that a lot of this will be typed in caps from now on -_-

Oooh he winked! I cannot handle this intense eroticism!

Surprise Saito! My favourite flavour of surprise (see, "Shinsengumi's bitch")!

The Shinsengumi are grateful for my efforts and, thus, have gifted me with the great gift of sweeping <3

Hijikata and Iba are so cute <3

Kazama's being edgy again X_X and murdering people. Classic Kazama.

Oh wow, he's actually calling us peasants.

Aw, we're talented peasants <3 How generous of him!

HOW DARE HE TRASH TALK OKITA LIKE THAT! Wow, I'm actually defending that asshole X_X

Hijikata baring his teeth like an angry doggo XD

I'm super mad at Kazama for killing that poor Shinsengumi guy :'( Such a thoughtless waste of life :'(

Now he's mocking Nagakura's obedience to the Shogun. What are your lofty ideals, Kazama? Ah yes, you want to subjugate and enslave the human race. How... noble...

Okay, so, apparently, Kazama is being a huge, murderous pain in the ass because he's just OH SO CONCERNED for the pride of his human allies. I don't buy it.

Ah, Hijikata called Kazama a petulant child :') Truer words were never spoken!

Okay, now Hijikata is saying that they don't deserve an honourable death?! Wow, Hijikata. That comment is not going to age well, I can tell you.

So maybe I agree with Kazama here!? He still shouldn't have murdered that guy, though.

I seriously don't understand why Hijikata is so keen to slaughter these guys and potentially lose more of his men just to force them to suffer a shameful death?! Maybe he doesn't see dying that way as dishonourable but I have no patience for people forcing their ideals onto others.

Aaah! Kazama throwing Hijikata's insult back in his face is pretty brilliant!

Kazama just sliced me in the face! Sexy?!

Sexy Points with Kazama because he's confirmed your full BROOD MARE potential.

Kazama likes calling people bitches so we have that in common.

So, now Hijikata respects them for committing seppuku?! I am CONFUSED.

Oh, now I'm getting Itou's origin story?! This is unexpected!

Wait, have I broken the game and accidentally romanced Kondou?! What is happening right now?! X_X

Oooh! I'm getting sword training! Yes please! This is better than sex :D

Feminist icon Kondou isn't going easy on me just because I'm a girl :D

Chapter 3

Aka: Sanan's breakdown!

"Those were his last words." O_O I... hope that that's not true...

Okay, now he's throttling me! I take it back! Somebody fillet this crazy fucker!

OMG WAS THAT CRUNCHING SOUND MY NECK?!

But why is he choking me when he could be sipping on my delicious blood? O_o

The awkward moment when your creepy brother is a hotter woman than you X_X

Apparently, Kazama's gazing at me with bloodlust. How romantic.

Haha! Apparently Kazama's hand is "pale and grasping like the tentacle of some hideous subterranean monster." X_X Hot.

Yay! Rescued from tentai boi by HajiBAE and SanoCUTEY! And Harada is calling out Kazama for being a creep :') This is a good day.

Kazama's response burn is weak. The culture and the nose of a dog? What does that even mean? Even if Harada's nose looked like a dog's, that'd still be pretty weak, imo.

Ha! Saito's response is basically just an Uno reverse card but I'm always here for calling Kazama out on his hypocrisy.

Omg, now Yamazaki is kidnapping me and Shiranui's calling him out! None of these hos have any chill!

Amagiri is taking a break from fighting to read Shiranui for being a hotheaded pain in the arse.

Hijikata is rightfully calling me an idiot for drawing my sword on Kazama :')

Kazama's insults are so blunt and childish but it's so funny! He just called Hijikata a weak shit! Apparently, fighting him is an honour and Hijikata isn't giving this diva the attention he believes he deserves.

Hijikata needs to stop calling me Kid X_X

"Sleazebag" = accurate.

Ooh, Sanan is paying me a late night visit! How risqué!

Of course I want to learn more about the water of life but The Grand High Nonce would apparently disapprove so I guess I'll have to wait until another route to find out :'(

Apparently Kazama's not going to abduct me TODAY. How reassuring.

I relate to Kazama admiring the beauty of the temple but he lost me by being a hypocrite again. Apparently, he doesn't understand how humans can destroy their creations with their wars. KAZAMA IS FIGHTING WITH THE PEOPLE WHO WANTED TO BURN KYOTO AND THEY PARTIALLY SUCCEEDED. Kazama can only destroy things, as far as I can tell.

Now he's ranting about how they lie, deceive and kill. Pot kettle black? "If they want something, they'll steal it." UGH, KAZAMA, YOU HAVE REPEATEDLY TRIED TO STEAL ME YOU HYPOCRITICAL FUCKWIT. HE'S SO FRUSTRATING. SUCH AN INSUFFERABLE COMBINATION OF PRETENTION, HYPOCRISY, CRUELTY, HUBRIS, I could go on XD I should stop... For now...

AAAAAH HE JUST SAID NOT TO TRUST THE SHINSENGUMI BECAUSE THEY KILL THEIR OWN MEN WITHOUT BATTING AN EYELASH. THAT'S WHAT KAZAMA DOES WHEN YOU FIRST MEET HIM! BUT I GUESS IT DOESN'T COUNT TO HIM BECAUSE THE MAN WASN'T PART OF HIS SUPERIOR RACE!

Sen = <3

Chapter 4 (This is where I went to sleep)

I feel like we could have got away with killing the guy who was SENTENCED TO DEATH if fricking Sanan hadn't shown up and revealed his alive-ness!

Aw, Itou is concerned about my arm!

Aaaaand he's ruined it by being a cunt XD "Would you like to know?" "Yes." "I won't tell you." X_X

Heisuke, Saito... HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME... WHEN I NEEDED TO... POSSES YOU... I HATED YOU; I LOVED YOU TOO... BAD DREAMS IN THE NIGHT.... *Continues singing Wuthering Heights and dances around the room dramatically*

"And then they were gone" :'(

Tbf, I'd be pretty mad if my comrades had been doing such dangerous, fucked up experiments behind my back.

"I am more concerned about the soldiers being left behind." - lies!

Wait, Sanan knew Itou "really well"?! Their only interaction until now was Itou being a mega-douche to him. I have so many questions!

Aw, Sanan trusts that our friendlings will return <3

Ooh! Going on a manju adventure with YAM!

Kazama strolling down the street and everybody being pushed out of the way by the douchebag waves rolling off of him.

Okay, so Kazama has come here alone to get pissed amongst humans?! That seems implausible...

"I might even allow you to pour me a drink." BLEUGH BLETCH BLUUURGH.

I CANNOT WITH THIS THOT AND HIS HYPOCRITICAL BULLSHIT. HOW DARE HE BRAG ABOUT HOW COOL AND DOWN WITH THE KIDS HE IS TO BE DRINKING WITH HUMANS AND THEN SLAG ME OFF FOR ASSOCIATING WITH HUMANS?!

If I'm supposedly so curious about the demon lifestyle, can I PLEASE just run away with Sen? :'(

WHY IS NOBODY ASKING WHAT I WANT?!? X_X I WANT TO GO WITH THE COOL DEMON LADIES!!!

"Yukimura. What do you have to say about this?" FINALLY!!! THANK YOU, KONDOU!

I really want to go but the game won't let me XD

Souji is correct. I clearly have rocks for brains XD

"Gosh" Appropriate reaction.

AAAAAAAAND MY BELOVED SHINSENGUMI IS IMMEDIATELY ENDANGERED BY MY POOR DECISIONS.

Ooh! Physical contact with Kazama! Sure, he's violently grabbing me but this thirsty bitch will take what she can get XD

Harada has the best put downs :') "Barging in here to get yourself a wife! You think you'd get the point by now after all these rejections..."

"You fools have no idea of her worth." BITCH I AM A well, not human but SENTIENT BEING! THEY TREAT ME WITH MORE RESPECT THAN YOU EVER DID YOU MASSIVE CREEP. I AM MORE THAN JUST A WOMB, YOU HO!!!

"She is most valuable when used by a fitting partner." THA FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY?!???! NOPENOPENOPE. A FITTING PARTNER WOULD NOT "USE" ME, BITCH.

"HA! So you decide to take her against her will just because you're too scared of the rejection you'll get from flat-out asking her out, huh?" YES HARADA!!! YOU CALL OUT THIS FUCKING NONCE!!! ALL RAPISTS ARE COWARDS!!! "You're so lame and creepy." WHERE IS THE LIE?!??

Meanwhile, Hijikata just makes it clear that he'd happily slice through me. Good to know.

I shall WIGGLE my way out of this situation! What do you mean it didn't work?!

YAAAS KONDOU! YOU FIGHT THAT BITCH!!!

OMG I JUST FELL ON TOP OF OKITA AND NOW HE'S SLUT SHAMING ME! XD

"Tell me... How is it? On top of me. Does it feel good?" O_O O_O O_O This game just got a lot more spicy!

Just fuck already! If only to piss off Kazama X_X

Aw, poor sick Okita <3

How dare they mention that the new HQ has a huge bath for warriors to bathe together and not have another thirst scene :P

Now Harada and Nagakura are slut shaming each other for having their tiddies out in Winter :')

Does this count as sexposition? Politics + tiddies?

"Itou dies." This is what happens when you base a game around true events! Problems aren't solved with the power of love and friendship! X_X

YES SAITO, PLEASE PROTECT ME FROM THIS MURDEROUS NONCE!

Chapter 5

At least in the normal route where nobody loves me, I don't get shot at by cannons O_O

There are a lot of typos in this chapter already. Perhaps the developers didn't expect anyone to be INSANE enough to romance Kazama.

DON'T TELL THIS RANDOM GUY YOUR PLANS YOU FOOL!!! IF THIS GETS INOUE KILLED, IMMA BE SO MAD!!!

NO INOUE!!! DON'T DRINK THE CRAZY JUICE!!!

NOOOOOO!!!! INOOOUUUUEEEE!!! :'(

Yes Queen, you call out those murdering cowards :'(

FFS I just got hella shot X_X

NO YOU GUYS ARE THE MONSTERS!!!

Apparently, I'm a "Noble Demon specimen" BITCH WHERE?!

"Why was Kazama helping me?" UM, HAVEN'T WE BEEN THROUGH THIS?! BECAUSE HE WANTS TO "USE" YOUR FERTILE WOMB TO BREED A NEW LINE OF DEMON CHILDREN.

"Shoot me? To death?" XD

"Kazama glared coldly at the pile of dismembered corpses on the floor" :') So romantic!

OMG IT'S THE BETTER DRESSED VERSION OF ME!!!

"Actually a man." UM, A CHILD, SEEMINGLY.

The whole creepy demonic family together at last :')

STOP CALLING ME ADORABLE AND LITTLE YOU CREEPY DEMON CHILD.

"What you're doing is disgraceful." YOU TELL HIM KAZAMA.

"Mind if I kill your family, right here and now?" O_O Kazama has zero chill! Thanks for asking, though, I guess. Go for it, Kazama XD

Oh, apparently I'm going to "talk to them" X_X

"Kodo, I could murder you over a thousand times, and it still wouldn't be enough for me." This is the most I've ever liked Kazama.

Doesn't Kazama work directly with Kodo in various routes?

Why can't I vanish like smoke? :'( Where are MY cool demon powers? :'(

"Turns out the only one capable of keeping you safe when you needed them most was me -- not them." HOW DARE YOU!!! INOUE GAVE HIS LIFE PROTECTING ME AND YOU'VE NEVER PUT YOUR OWN PRECIOUS NECK OUT THERE FOR ANYONE IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE YOU POMPOUS ASS!!! YOU'VE NEVER HAD TO WORK FOR ANYTHING IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE, HAVE YOU?! YOU WERE BORN A DEMON PRINCE AND THAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT YOU'RE BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE?!? BECAUSE YOU HAVE POWERS YOU DIDN'T EARN?!

"If your idea of a good time is seeing the rotting corpses of your friends, be my guest..." 8_8 :'( No, they can't all be dead! Surely not! Kazama don't say things like that!

The Yodo are going to betray the Shogunate?!? I must warn them D:

Wow, this just got heavy and real sad.

Wait, did he just admit to meddling in the war?! He is such a hypocrite!!!! Aaaaaaah!!! Somebody call him out on his bs!!!!

SEN AND KIMIGIKU <3 SAVE ME!

Even Shiranui sees that humans have a variety of complex motivations X_X

I AM NOT YOUR FUTURE WIFE!!!!

Do the Shinsengumi just assume that I'm dead?!

Great, now I'm on a road trip with this cunt.

"I've never actually been this close to a man before..." Calm down! That horse is third wheeling so hard right now. And what about that time you fell ON TOP OF Okita?!

Welp, that's it for Kyoto Winds! Onwards to Edo Blossoms! I still don't like Kazama but at least murdering the ever-loving FUCK out of Kodo is a cause that I can believe in. Although, one of the reasons that I hated Kodo in Saito's route was because he was helping the same sex pest I'm now galloping across the country with. Huh.

This is the most that I’ve ever used the word, “nonce” in my entire life and this is only the first game.

#hakuoki #hakuouki #kyoto winds #kazama chikage #watch me lose my marbles #Spoilers #sorry kazama fans #so many words

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bazypitchandsimonsnow · 6 years ago

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Watford Cove

Chapter 5: not so typical love song

Rating: T

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Word count: 5365

Chapter: 5/13 [All chapters]

Summary: Baz goes to Simon's house to work on the project.

Read on AO3

AN: So as some of you may know/remember, I work at an amusement park. I was supposed to work today but it's literally raining all day so the park is most certainly closed. Which means I can post early! Hooray! This is personally one of my favourite chapters. I enjoyed writing it quite a bit, though I had trouble writing Baz's emotions. The boy is a weird self destructive mess and it's difficult getting that across lol. Finally, we learn a bit more about Simon. Plus some fluff, of course. Hope you all like it!

Tagging: @wayward-son-61 @lunar-lover394

———————————————-

“Where are you going?”

I lazily turn towards Mordelia. She’s standing next to me with her arms behind her back, rocking on her heels. The picture of an adorable, unassuming child. You can hardly tell she's a brat.

“Out,” I reply.

“Mum says you go out too much.”

I do feel a bit bad about that. Daphne does legitimately care about my well being. “Well, you can tell her I’m not going out drinking. She can stop worrying.”

“Drinking what?”

I sigh. Right, she is still seven years old. “Nevermind. I’m just going to do schoolwork at someone’s house. I might be home for supper or not, I don’t know.”

“Okay. When can I ride on your motorbike?”

I smirk and buckle up my helmet. “Let's wait until you can reach the pedals. Then we’ll talk.”

Mordelia pouts pathetically. I ruffle her hair, which only makes her pout become an impressive scowl. I flip down my visor with flare and rev my engine. I give Mordelia a salute before driving off down the country road.

Simon’s house isn’t that far from mine, actually. Maybe a twenty minute ride, the way I break the speeding laws. I zip down the hill at ludicrous speeds, and keep that pace up across the country roads until they become moderately paved. Soon I’m on the sparse outskirts of Watford Cove, not the bloody fucking wilderness like mine. A much nicer place to live in my opinion.

Only a few minutes in, I arrive at the address Simon texted me. The house is actually quite posh. It’s not the terrible extravagance of the Pitch mansion of course, but it’s nice. Red brick, white shutters, some fancy curtains. There's a silver mailbox at the end of the drive with "Salisbury" painted on it in annoyingly bright green letters. The handwriting looks childish, as in a child probably wrote it. The initials "LS" are under the words like an artist's signature. Hm, interesting.

I park my bike in the driveway then make my way to the oak door. The doorbell chimes deep and loud. There’s some steps and soon it swings open. Oh. This is...not Simon. Because Simon is not an older greying-blonde woman.

This woman reminds me of portraits my own grandmother. She was also tall, straight backed, and respectful looking. But my grandmother never showed an ounce of happiness. This woman has a very kind smile on her face though, her wrinkles more from the expression rather than age.

“Hello,” she says kindly. “May I help you?”

“Um, I’m here to see Simon.”

Both her blue eyes and smile widen. “Oh right, Simon said you were coming. Simon! Your friend is here!”

There’s a crashing sound, like someone falling on the ground. Rapid steps come down the stairs until a beaming Simon jumps to the bottom.

“Hi Baz,” he says breathlessly. “Glad you found it.”

“I have Google Maps, Salisbury,” I deadpan, but with a smirk.

“Oh yeah, right, let’s go.” He motions for me to follow him inside. I nod to the woman. She looks up towards the stairs, hands on her hips.

“Simon,” she says with mock accusation, “are you not going to introduce me to your friend?”

Simon freezes halfway up the steps and whips his head around. “Oh right! Sorry, Gran. Um, Gran, this is Baz. Baz, this is my grandmother, Ruth Salisbury.”

I reach out my hand. “Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Salisbury.”

Her brows rise up in surprise. I suppose she didn’t expect politeness from a guy wearing a black Ramones shirt, leather jacket, and ear piercings. But she still takes my hand. “Pleasure to meet you as well, Baz. You two have fun.”

Simon scoffs. “It’s school, Gran. We’re not supposed to have fun.”

“School can be fun if you try, darling. Maths has made me very good at cards.”

“And you fleece Mrs. Jones every week at your games, I know. We gotta go.”

“Yes yes, go do your schoolwork. Don’t break anything.”

Simon and Ms. Salisbury smile good naturedly at each other as we go upstairs. He runs at a breakneck pace, nearly tripping over the green carpet. I follow more slowly, looking over the walls. Unlike my house, there are many personalised things. Landscape art, funny knick knacks, and some pictures. There’s one of Ms. Salisbury with an older man, who I assume to be her husband. Next to that, there’s the couple again but in their younger years. A boy and girl stand in the foreground, both as blonde as Ms. Salisbury. The last one at the top of the stairs is obviously the two kids as teenagers, grinning with arms around each other. The woman looks weirdly familiar. Her freckles, they remind me of...stars.

“Baz, c’mon!” Simon yells.

“Yes, yes, I’m coming. You’re quite bossy today, darling,” I say teasingly. I hear his gasp, then fall into a coughing fit.

“I-I just want to start working.” His voice is still a bit hoarse.

“Alright.”

I saunter down to the hall Simon went down. I step into his room, and...well, I’m not sure what else I expected. The bed and desk look old, but everything else is new. The floral blanket, the multicoloured rug, the IKEA shelf filled with comics, all quite fresh. The walls are bright blue and covered in posters. Troye Sivan, Lana del Ray, Hayley Kiyoko, and assorted pastel coloured art. Equally pastel clothes are spread out across the floor. The whole room is so...bright. It sort of hurts my eyes. I’d prefer everything a bit darker. I guess I like Simon’s colour palette in small doses, just not all in one room.

I look up. Simon’s at his desk. I finally notice that he’s wearing a new shirt. It’s like the sunflower one, but pink and with bright red rosebuds instead. It works with the copper undertones of his hair. He looks perfect in it.

“Pretty,” I whisper.

“What?” Simon asks sweetly.

Fuck, I hope my face isn’t as red as his shirt right now. “Um, nothing.”

He looks confused for only a moment then shrugs. “Okay. I woke up late and forgot breakfast, so I'm starving. Want some of this? For brain food and stuff.” He holds up a mint aero bar. My smile is instantaneous.

“Sure. Mint aeros are my favourite.”

He grins to his ears. “Mine too!

I sit in the chair next to him. He breaks off a large piece for me. We eat the chocolate at the same time, but Simon gets some around his mouth. (Of course he's a messy eater.) I want to slowly lick it off his cheek then kiss him so hard we run out of breath. I quickly look away to resist temptation. “So, you got the project up?”

“Oh yeah!” He turns back to his laptop. I see that the desk is covered in scribbly note paper, candy wrappers, and nail polish bottles. He’s got almost every colour in his preferred pastel shade. He’s actually wearing the pink one right now. It matches his shirt. I have to keep myself from making an out loud comment again.

“So I’ve started making the powerpoint,” Simon says, bringing up the application. “And I think we should start with Watership Down. The actual place. Cause it’s like, the most important setting right?”

I bite my tongue, because I...disagree. Strongly. Watership Down should be in the middle, because it is the end of their first journey and the beginning of the next. It’s important to illustrate that, I think. But he doesn’t know I would think that.

“Sure, cool,” I mutter.

“O-Okay. Then, uh, for characters, we should start with General Woundwort.”

Wrong, very wrong. He’s important, sure, but others should be discussed first. Maybe Hazel, Bigwig, or Fiver. Fuck, Bluebell should come before Woundwort.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” I hope there isn’t a strain in my voice.

“Awesome! And I thought for analysis, we could talk about the archetypes and shit.”

No! Archetypes are Jungian! We’re supposed to do Freudian! Oh, fuck it.

“Give me that,” I hiss, snatching the laptop away. Simon blinks at me confused. I type furiously, barely thinking really, just spouting out the knowledge I have onto the slides. Some of the stuff is very smart but not well put, so I redo the wording. Not good with words, just like Simon said. I don’t know how long it takes, but when I’m done, I put the laptop back on the desk with my arms crossed.

“There,” I say curtly.

Simon looks through it, jaw falling open wider and wider with every slide. I shift away. Christ, this is embarrassing.

“Holy shit,” Simon whispers. I wait for him to start laughing, or yelling because I change his work. But he just turns to me with big awe filled eyes. “You’re...really smart.”

My cheeks must be as red as tomatoes now. I scoff and look at the Hayley Kiyoko poster. “Yeah, whatever.”

“No, no, I mean it, Baz. This is bloody brilliant! You’re super smart!” His brow furrows. “Why do you never show up to class? You could be getting As in like, everything.”

I press my lips together, digging my nails into my bicep. “I don’t care about school or grades. That’s all.”

“Really? You just, don’t care?”

“No, I don’t.”

Simon sighs, and I hate how close to pity it sounds. I don’t need his pity or anyone else’s. I made my choice a long time ago, and I don’t regret it. Well, I mostly don’t regret it. Certainly don’t regret because of where I’m going when term is done. Not at all...

“So, uh,” Simon says rapidly, obviously trying to break the forming tension, “I'm also mostly done the drawings. I’ll scan them later and put them in the presentation if you like them.”

He pulls out a sketchbook from his desk and flips through the pages. He shoves it in my face once he’s found the right one, making me jolt back in my chair. I snatch it from him.

“Christ, Salisbury, let me actually look,” I chuckle.

“Oh, sorry, sorry.”

I look at the picture, and it’s my turn to be awestruck. It’s...amazing. Rough, raw, a bit messy, but amazing. He’s captured Watership Down in just pencil. Sure, it’s just a hill, but Simon has drawn it from the perspective of the rabbits, so it looks looming and majestic. There are little shapes at the top, and I realise it’s a few of the rabbits looking out into the distance. A cute and perfect addition.

“Wow, this is incredible,” I say with absolute reverence.

Simon blinks at me. He seems genuinely surprised. “R-Really?”

“Yes. You’re very talented, Simon.”

“Oh, uh, well, thanks. I’m...really glad you think so.” He fiddles with his fingers nervously. “There’s a-a couple more if you want to see them. Three pages after.”

I flip through a few more pages. There are a lot of rough, abstract sketches. They look more like feelings than specific things. Waves of smoke, angry scribbles of pencil, over and over. He must do that a lot. Eventually, I land on what I think I'm supposed to see. It's obviously Fiver, based on the photo he showed me. But it's not an exact replica. It's a gorgeous interpretation. He's emphasized Fiver's large, sad, all knowing eyes. You can almost see everything terrifying and wonderful happening in them. To say I’m impressed doesn’t really cover it.

I go to the next page, and I immediately recognise it as a scene from the animated movie. When El Ahrairah, the first rabbit, was given physical gifts to survive predators from their fictitious god Frith. This one is in colour, and somehow even more stylised than the movie. El Ahrairah himself is a deep rich brown with grey loops, the sun is swirl of orange and yellow, and the sky is ripples of vibrant blue. The same colour as his eyes.

“These,” I say, “are perfect, Simon.”

Simon chuckles nervously, fiddling with his fingers. “I’m glad you think so. Think Miss Possibelf will approve?”

“If she doesn’t, she’s completely incompetent. And I don’t think that’s true.” I absentmindedly turn to the next page. It’s the start of another unfinished drawing. It’s of someone’s face. Someone with sharp cheekbones and dark wavy hair. Wait, is that-

Simon snatches the book and quickly flips it closed. He hides half his scarlet face behind the leather cover for a long moment, until he nervously coughs and lowers it. “Okay, good,” he stutters. “Glad you think so. I, uh, guess we’re done now. Man, we really could just do most of this over text.” Mother of God, must he keep doing that hair tuck? It’s torture.

“I suppose that's true," I chuckle.

"Wanna hang out?" He asks very quickly, gripping his sketchbook with ghost white knuckles.

I shouldn't. Fuck, I really shouldn't. I should go home, avoid him, keep my toxic self far away from Simon. But fucking hell, I'm weak for this boy, and just weak in general.

"Sure." My voice stays impressively neutral. "Any ideas?"

Simon twists his lips, looking around the brightly coloured room. His eyes drift down to my hands and he smiles mischievously. “I could redo your nails.”

I look down at my hands. Well, my nails are definitely chipped. I forgot to repaint them a few days ago. I look back at him with a raised brow. “I doubt you have a bottle of my ‘Chanel Le Vernis in Gris Obscur’, Salisbury.”

“Nah, definitely no Chanel. But I got some pretty good stuff from the drugstore.” He lifts up some obviously cheap but pretty nail varnish bottles. They’re all his pastels colours though.

“Not really my style.”

He shrugs. “Maybe you’d like to try something new?”

I bite the corner of my mouth. The colours hurt my eyes a bit. But he looks so adorable with that hopeful grin and glint in his eyes. I sigh, and put my left hand out. “Very well. I want your darkest shade though.”

Simon literally bounces with excitement. “Awesome! So, uh, how about...” He messes around with the bottles, almost dropping a few. Eventually he settles on a pale blue. “This one, and,” he holds up a unused looking dark grey, “this one? We can alternate.”

“Hm, sure. That grey doesn’t really match your style, though.”

He shrugs. “Eh, came with the set. Glad it did. It, uh, matches your eyes.” He looks pointedly at the desk instead of my face. That’s good though. I don’t want him to see the blush that’s spread across my cheeks. “Now gimme your right hand.”

I do as he says, placing it on the desk. He puts down some paper towel then pick up his nail polish remover and cotton balls. I have the exact same supplies at home. He reaches towards my hand, but quickly hesitates. He’s shaking actually. I can’t blame him. Every time we’ve touched, it’s been accidental or very quickly. This is different. This isn't a shoulder pat or playful shove. This is long and sustained and purposeful. And I may not be showing it, but I’m just as nervous.

“I can take it off myself,” I say quickly, reaching for the bottle. But Simon pulls it away.

“No no, I’m good. Just sit there and look...badass, alright?”

My lip twitches up. He’s so sweet. I leave my hand where it is. “Very well.”

Slowly, shakily, he slips his finger under mine. His skin is callused but still much smoother than my rough palms. It feels weird, but very nice. Almost electric. He dabs the cotton ball on the nail, rubbing off all my high end black nail polish. Huh, they look odd. it’s been awhile since my nails have been clean. After wiping them dry, he starts on with the blue. It’s a nice colour. Not something I would pick, but I can see the appeal. Simon drags the brush against my nail slowly but surely, making sure the coat is even.

“Hm,” I say, “you’re good at this.”

“Thanks,” he chuckles. “Self taught. A lot of trial and error, y’know? Took me ages to figure out how to do my right hand.”

“I learned from YouTube videos. Those makeup gurus know their shit.”

“Huh, smart. Oh, y’know what.” He stops painting and spins in his chair. Even with his back to me, I now he’s fiddling with his phone. Suddenly, the honeyed voice of Lana Del Rey is resonating through the room. He spins back with a grin.

“Your weird music is necessary?” I raise an eyebrow for sarcastic emphasis. Simon chuckles.

“Yeah, helps me concentrate. And it’s part of my continuing effort to convert you to good music.”

“Oh, is that your grand mission?”

“Yup! Slowly pull you away from all those screamy boys with bad haircuts and towards the beauty of Troye and Lana.”

I scoff. “You keep trying that, darling.”

He gives me a shy but sort of playful look from under his long eyelashes. “I certainly will...darling.”

Oh shit. I hope my complexion hides my blush enough. I smile back and try to look calm, hiding the storm in my chest.

We switch between chatting and companionable silence. Though Simon is never truly quiet. He hums along with the song, or makes noises of contemplation and frustration while trying to get my nails right. His hands slowly get less shaky, which helps. When we’re not talking, I take the opportunity to just watch his expression. How he sticks his tongue out in concentration, and his brow pulls together, and his face adorable pinches together when he gets something wrong. He always tries his best to fix it though, even with his clumsy fingers. It’s really sweet. Just like him.

I'm so unbelievably fucked.

“And...there!” He pulls back with a flourish. “Topcoat and everything. What do you think?”

I examine my hands. Huh, the blue is actually nice on me. And he’s right, the grey matches my eyes. It’s very well done. Maybe black isn’t the only colour I should use. I look up. Simon is staring at me wide eyed, chewing on his lip, leg jittering.

“It’s wonderful,” I say. “You did a marvelous job, Salisbury. Maybe you have a future as a nail artist.”

His nervous expression breaks, thankfully. I’ve found I prefer his grin to his genuine agitation. Blushing smile? Adorable. Wide eyed leg jittering? Not so much. “T-Thanks. Maybe...you could do mine sometime?”

Our eyes meet, and there’s no deception there. He’s always so genuine. It’s amazing. “Sure," I say before thinking. "If you can learn to like black.”

She shrugs. “Well, if you can learn to like blue, I guess I can try black.”

He grins, and I grin back. There’s a stretch of silence. It builds between us, making the air thicker and thicker. I’m torn between what I want to say and what I should. That I want more from this, more than just winks and smiles and “darlings”. But I know it can’t work. Simon should know that. I should tell him, all of it. But...he'll hate me. For not telling him about Switzerland, for using him like a plaything, for being an utterly stupid reckless prick. Can I handle him truly hating me?

“Simon, love! It’s nearly supper! Are you and Baz done your work?” Ms. Salisbury’s voice carries quite well. It jolts me from my depressive pit. Simon sighs and leans out towards the door.

“Yeah! Be down in a minute, Gran.” He looks at me, and I swear I see genuine sadness. “Looks like it’s time to say goodbye.”

I try to hide my own disappointment. “Yeah, looks like it.”

He bounces out of his chair, then offers his hand. I inhale sharply. Did not expect that. But after only a second of hesitation, I take it. He pulls me to my feet with ease. I’m still disturbed by how much his strength excites me.

“C’mon, let’s get you back on your motorbike, Pitch.”

“Should get you on it one day,” I say under my breath.

“What?”

I straighten up, hands in my jacket pockets. “Nothing, Salisbury.”

We walk down the stairs quickly. Well, Simon more jumps down them. He’s a never ending ball of energy. Ms. Salisbury is at the bottom.

“How was the work, you two?” she asks sweetly.

“Wonderful!” Simon chirps. “Talked about bunnies and stuff, and Baz let me do his nails.”

My brow shoots up to my hairline. I can’t believe he’s so open about this. If I told my father or Daphne the same, they would not say anything at best and lecture me at worst. But Ms. Salisbury looks positively elated by Simon’s words. “Oh, marvellous. Finally you can practice on someone other than me, love.”

Simon rolls his eye. “Yeah, like you don’t like it.”

“Of course. But it’s good you have another guinea pig. May I see your work?”

Simon looks at me in silent question. I shrug in response, then hold out my hand for his grandmother. She flips the glasses down from her head. “Amazing job, Simon. You’ve gotten so much better. And it looks great on you, Baz.”

“Thank you, Ms. Salisbury.”

She pulls away, waving dismissively. “Please, call me Ruth. Now, Baz, will you be staying for dinner?”

“Uh.” I turn to Simon. “Am I staying for dinner, Simon?”

Simon’s face turns red. “Oh, sure, if you want.”

I shrug. “I’m certainly in no rush to get home, and if it’s no trouble.”

“Oh it’s none at all,” Ms. Salis- Ruth says, waving her hand dismissively.

“Then I guess I’ll stay for supper.”

Ruth claps her hand once loudly. “Wonderful! Let me put out another setting.”

She saunters off to the kitchen. I decide to actually take off my jacket and boots and stay awhile. Simon leans in close to my ear, making my pulse spike.

“Hope you like roast beef,” he whispers. “It’s the only thing Gran knows how to cook well. Grandpa was a chef, and she’s been on her own since he died, so she’s never had to cook anything else. But she’s been learning more since I’ve got here.”

I shrug like he does. “I think I’ll live.”

“Good to hear.”

Simon leads me to the small dining room table. When I go to the left side, Simon grabs my hand and drags me to the right. I jolt slightly. Wow, that’s bold for him. Not that I’m complaining. I sit next to him as Ruth brings out a platter of delicious smelling meat and mash potatoes. Simon immediately shovels the food on his plate, licking his lips like a starving animal. I on the other hand take only a few slices delicately just like my mother taught me. But Ruth gives me an odd look.

“Are you not hungry, Baz?” she asks.

“Um, no, I am,” I reply slowly.

“Then please, take as much as you like. I always make a lot because of Simon’s endless appetite.”

Simon rolls his eyes, speaking with a mouth full of roast beef. “I’m a growing boy!”

“Growing monster more like it,” Ruth chuckles.

Huh, okay. I decide to be polite and take some more. Dinner proper starts, and it's...weird. My family is never this talkative at supper. We’re mostly silent and sullen. But the Salisburies are the exact opposite. Ruth and Simon chat, though Simon has trouble responding through all the the food in his mouth. (The boy has zero manners. It’s adorable.)

“So, Baz,” Ruth asks, facing me, “how’s school for you? I’ve only ever heard about it from Simon and Miss Penelope.”

No one’s ever asked my opinion of school either. I shrug. “It’s alright. Not my favourite place to be, of course. I think English is my favourite subject.” I tap Simon’s foot under the table. His breath hitches slightly, and he flashes me only a small smile. But it’s enough.

“Glad to hear so. Simon loves English too. He’s always eager to get to first period for Miss Possibelf’s class every morning.”

I flick my eyes over to Simon. His cheeks are flushed as he bites into his roast beef.

“Hm, glad to hear I’m not the only one who loves literature.” I let my voice drawl a bit, hopefully enough for Simon to notice but not Ruth. He doesn’t look up from his food, but I feel his toe tap my foot. And once again, it’s enough. Everything Simon does seems to be enough for me.

“I’m just glad Simon’s adjusting to Watford,” Ruth sighs. “It’s not easy moving schools most of the way through the year.”

Simon sighs in return. They sound almost exactly alike. Though Simon is more exasperated. “I told you, Gran, I’m fine. My grades are much better than last term.”

“There’s a good reason for that.” Ruth aggressively stabs her beef, and Simon looks sad as he nods slightly. This is the only crack in Ruth's kind demeanour I’ve seen all day. It’s strange, and the curious brainiac in me wants to know more. But the sensible part knows to just keep eating my food.

“Hey,” Simon chirps, “did I tell you about the kid who gave himself a wedgie in gum class yet?”

Ruth’s playful smile immediately returns. “No, I don’t believe you have.”

“Oh man, it was hilarious! Baz you’ll love this too.”

I lean my cheek into my palm. “I’m sure I will.”

Simon launches into the rambling anecdote, using mostly weird noises and illustrative hand gestures instead of words. Ruth and I both laugh along genuinely. This is the first time I’ve enjoyed a family meal in ages. It may be unusual, but it’s certainly not unenjoyable.

Soon enough, dinner is over, and Ruth brings out dessert. They’re sour cherry scones from Pritchard Bakery. Simon takes three immediately and starts slathering butter all over them.

“You like scones?” I ask mockingly.

Simon nods, scone crumbs all around his mouth. “Uh-huh. Gran got me some my first day here. They’re absolutely incredible.”

“My cousin owns the bakery, you know.”

His eyes go impossibly wide. “Really?! Could you get me some free samples?”

I shrug, a playful smile on my face. “Maybe.”

“Simon, you eat enough, you don’t need any more,” Ruth kindly berates. Simon frowns.

“There’s never enough scones, Gran.”

Ruth and I exchange an understanding look. Maybe I will bring him to see Cousin Pritchard before I go though. Something to make him happy before I’m gone.

Soon enough, Simon’s eaten all the scones, the dishes are done, and it’s my time to go. I’m a gentleman, I know when to take my leave. Simon and Ruth walk me out of the house.

“It was lovely having you, Baz,” Ruth says. And I have to admit, I’m a bit taken aback. Most parents and/or guardians aren’t this friendly to me. Dev and Niall’s parents barely acknowledge my existence nowadays, and they’ve known me since I was a baby. It’s a warm feeling I never thought I’d miss.

“Thank you for having me, Ruth,” I reply, smiling graciously.

“Anytime. Simon, feel free to invite him over again.”

Simon smiles sweetly at me, cheeks unabashedly scarlet. “Yeah, okay. Maybe we should meet up before the presentation on Wednesday?”

I nod, hoping my cheeks aren’t as bright. “I think I’d like that.”

Because I would. I regretfully very much would.

“Awesome! See you later!”

My lip twitches up without thinking. “See you.”

I get my helmet on. I don’t rev my engine as loud as usual to be respectful. Simon waves with his entire arm, while Ruth’s looks more like the queen. I salute in return. (That seems to be my thing now. I’ve embraced it.)

As I drive back towards my home, my mind stays with the Salisburies. With nail polish, roast beef, and a sense of peaceful happiness that lingers in me long after the house is in the distance.

I get to the Pitch hill and just sit there, looking up at the looming little bastard. I know what I’m supposed to do. Go back to all the misery there. But fuck that. I turn to the left, not back towards Simon’s, but at least somewhere my father isn’t. Somewhere I can keep this feeling for a little longer. And maybe get really pissed.

———————————————-

“Basilton! Where have you been?!”

If I didn’t already have a migraine, I’d assume my father’s voice had just given me one. Going on a two day bender will do that to you. I stop walking but don’t turn around. Honestly, I look like a wreck right now, and I don’t want him to see it.

“Away,” I say curtly.

“Away where?! We haven’t seen you in days! No calls, no mail. We’ve been worried sick!”

I groan and turn on my heels finally. To my utter surprise, he looks genuinely concerned. His eyes are wide and his hair is disheveled, like he’s been running his hands through it. Huh. Actually worried about where I’ve been. That’s a first.

“Well, I’m home now,” I sigh. “Happy?”

“Certainly not.” He puts his hands on his hips like a pissed off school teacher. “I’ve been getting calls from your school. You’ve missed almost all of your classes, including tests and projects. I thought we had an agreement.”

I whip around, scowling with as much menace as I can muster with a hangover. “No, you gave me an ultimatum. And I refuse to be threatened into doing what you want, Father dearest.”

I start stomping away again, but we Grimms refuse to not have the last word. “Are you sure you haven’t just been...distracted, Basilton?”

I stop halfway up the stairs. The tone of his voice could imply many things, but I have a sinking feeling I know what he means. I chuckle, shaking my head. “Daphne told you about Tuesday, I suppose.”

“That you brought a boy over to our house without our knowledge? Yes. And I find it a bit disrespectful that-”

“That I what?!” I yell, probably louder than I should, considering it’s late at night and I have four younger siblings. “Dare to be gay?! Sorry it’s harder to ignore my sexuality when I’m actually acting on it.”

My father takes a deep breath, something he always does when he’s trying to keep his slipping composure. “Basilton, that is not what I meant.”

“Oh really? So you’re actually okay with me bringing guys around? Maybe I’ll start having big gay nightclub parties in the receiving room.”

I can see my father losing his cool. Bit by bit, his perfect British man composure is slipping. It’s the effect I certainly have these days. “That would not be appropriate, Basil. And I merely meant that maybe this ‘Simon’ is distracting you from your studies and causing your poor grades.”

For a second, I don’t know whether to laugh or be furious. Fire bubbles in my gut, my fingers curling on the bannister. Yup, let’s go with righteous fury. I stomp down the stairs and push my face into his.

“No,” I growl, “Simon is not at fault. You are. You are the catalyst for all the things I’m doing now, Your bullheadedness, your pride, your prejudi-”

“Oh for God’s sake, Basil!” He roars. “For once in your life take some goddamn responsibility for your own actions!”

I step back a bit. I haven’t seen him this outwardly angry in a year, but he’s practically seething. If he was the kind of man to throw a punch, he would have just clocked me. But instead he just stares me down in an attempt to intimidate. That won’t work.

“Fuck you,” I mutter, turning on my heels and stomping towards the door.

“Where are you going?” he calls after me.

“Out!” I turn to glare at him. “And I’ll be back when I feel like it!”

I make sure to slam the door very loudly, hoping my message is clear. I know exactly where I want to go. And who I want to see.

———————————————-

AN: Is Baz being a total brat here? Yes. Is his bratiness sorta justified? Also yes. Things are complicated. And finally we meet Ruth! I loved reading everyone's comments speculating about Simon's home life cause this was planned from the start lol. But why is Simon living with Ruth? Well, that will be explained shortly. Tune in next time for answers :)

Chapter title is from "Alfie's Song" by Bleachers.

#carry on #snowbaz #simon snow #baz pitch #ruth salisbury #fluff #angst #punk/pastel #mysnowbazfanfic

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listoriented · 7 years ago

Text

Bob Came in Pieces

and not an ejaculation joke in sight

When/Where/Why: Working out the origin of this one gave me a bit of a headache. Turns out I got it in something called “Northern Lights Indies Summer 2010”, a five game bundle that also came with Crayon Physics Deluxe, Saira, Plain Sight and Blueberry Garden (of last week’s fame but already owned). I paid US$20 for this bundle in July 2010 and let this be yet another reminder that ideas of what was considered a “deal” have changed significantly since. It’s frankly astonishing that anyone still makes money from games.

At the same time I also apparently bought Beat Hazard, which we’ve been over, and two packs of DLC for Borderlands, which we’ll get to, like, soon enough, because oh it’s the next game, how’s about that.

What/Who: Bob Came in Pieces is a 2D physicsy puzzle-platformer. You play as Bob, an alien call-centre worker who accidentally crash-landed on earth. Bob needs to find a particular piece of hardware in order to get home, a hyperdrive somethingarather, so you fly Bob from place to place in their little spaceship, looking for it. The game is divided into chapters, each of which (after the first couple) requires you to do some amount of envionmental puzzle solving in order to get to the exit. Each chapter also contains five other spaceship parts which you can collect (sometimes themselves hidden or requiring extra puzzle-solving to get to). The kicker is that these spaceship parts can be tacked on and off Bob’s spaceship at numerous spots throughout each level - pretty much at any time you have to solve a different puzzle, actually - so you have to kind of build and dismantle the spaceship as the situation changes.

It’s by Ludosity [official site], who are frommmm Sweden! (Fun Fact: this is the third game in a row by a Swedish developer, and the game before that sort-of pretended to be made by a Swedish developer. What does this tell us about Sweden, games and this part of the alphabet? Almost certainly nothing.) Ludosity have made quite a few games by now. I haven’t played any of the others, but I have heard of Card City Nights and Ittle Dew (heard of them, in fact, because I apparently own them). Bob Came In Pieces was Ludosity’s third game, and it came out in 2009.

Prior exposure to pieces: Never installed.

Duration: 4ish hours.

Finishment: I finished the 14 chapters that constitute the games normal adventure mode, hooray for me! I didn’t bother trying to speedrun any of the levels or to collect all the extra optional space-ship parts though. This game has a heap of achievements, probably for these very things. I only have 17 out of 81 of them.

Whole-some fun: Here we are, game number fifty, List Oriented’s half-century, and I feel blessed and lucky because this old indie was, despite my expectations, both enjoyable and doable.

Out of the blocks it looks a bit rubbish, dominated by large angular polygons and not a lot else, that awkward style that is neither old nor new, here nor there, suffering with time rather than retro chic. But by the end I came to be quite fond of the game’s environments and the shitty graphics that house them, having gone from wooded to slightly industrial to subterranean to snowy, all occasionally dotted with endearing background doodads, stick-figure cave drawing, homely nooks and crannies amid the large puzzle contraptions, other little splatters of personality. Maybe it’s the colours or lighting, I don’t know, but it often seems suggestive of warmth in what might otherwise be quite cold, lifeless, mechanised settings, and this warmth reaches deeper than you’d expect.

This is helped exponentially by the music, which is understated and simple but honestly pretty great. It’s all floating ambient synthwave, high notes climbing for the sky, yearning and optimistic. I mean, I -probably- wouldn’t play the game just to listen to the soundtrack, but it works well because it’s not easy to get sick of and the loops aren’t super obvious (at least, not in passive listening terms).

And then there’s the platforming AKA flying a tiny spaceship around, which is surprisingly stupid-good fun. Gravity and (ahem) thrust have been worked out so everything has a real weight to it, but given enough space and power the ship can build up some real reckless and joyful speeds. Needing to augment your ship with parts for different puzzles is less tedious than it sounds, too, with a lot of the extra parts being superfluous flotsam that really just seems to be there for the extra collectables rather than the practical utility, so you’re only really changing out a couple of main attachments and occasionally building like, e.g. an extra-long arm to solve a puzzle where you have to reach for a thing through a small gap.

Because of the physics, the ship becomes a lot harder to control when you start adding extra random parts on, which is discouragement enough from overcomplicating things. Some of the puzzles from the mid-game onwards require the use of a gravity ray, which is perennially awkward to use, with heavier items physically very difficult to pick up and manoeuvre into the small spaces the game sometimes demands. I found this annoying at first, but it’s one of those “the more you learn” situations, and it was eventually pretty satisfying when things did go according to plan.

I also enjoyed that the puzzles were on the easier side, at least so far as progression went (obviously I didn’t get all the collectables so there’s a lot that I didn’t solve and therefore can’t say much about). I won’t deny it. Sometimes it’s just nice to get things done. The levels themselves are pleasingly bite-sized. The game has a nice casual rhythm where you can jump in for half an hour, get a couple of levels done and then go do something else for a bit, until there’s no more game left and it’s time to write your blog post about it (or whatever).

Anyway: Fifty games! A little milestone for you and I. There’s still a long way to go, but we may as well pause a little here and observe this moment (much like how in cricket a batsman raises their bat when they reach fifty runs), because due to the longish nature of the next game and some other plans I have in the interim it might be a few weeks before I get to post again.

Two more things unrelated to this game or even games in general: One is that recently I put together and edited a bunch of music I recorded back in 2010 into an album, which I released last week. It’s insular, lo-fi bedroom pop and I understand that’s probably not your thing, but feel free to check it out if that is your thing. Sales so far suggest my music career poses no threat to my writing career, so don’t be too concerned.

The other thing is that Octopus Pie came to it’s conclusion today. Octopus Pie has been my favourite webcomic pretty much since I started reading it in 2007, and I wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone and everyone. It portrays a lot of very relatable experiences of life as a twenty-something in subtly poignant and funny ways. I’m very sad that there won’t be any more of it, and excited to see what the author does next. Borderlands is next on the list.

#game50 #northern lights indies summer 2010 #ludosity #sweden #bob came in pieces #2009 #puzzle platformer #physics #2d #cold noodles #octopus pie

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