#and thinks that ed is the only one who can relate and understand him

[cern1cal0]

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Okay, so, there's one thing that I'm kind of tired of beating around the bush with white fans about, and it's this: if you pretend to "ignore" race in OFMD, you will miss a lot of what the story is trying to tell you.

Now, I do not truly believe that race is something you can ignore in a story. I just don't think it's possible, and when you try, what you wind up with is something like the conservative worldview of "not seeing color." Trying to ignore race will make you sound racist and ignore important racialized themes.

You can't understand Stede's need for character growth at the beginning of the show if you just focus on how he's "cringe" instead. When Stede makes his crew members of color serve them at dinner when the English board, this is gross, and their faces tell us exactly how they feel about it. Stede unlearning his biases here isn't subtle (guy who called him and Pete "fucking racists" I love you forever), and learning to take all of his crew members seriously as fully actualized people, moving away from the sort of Kindergarten-teacher behavior at the start to truly valuing them as people and taking their input and suggestions, it's an important aspect. Stede asking Abshir for intel at the party isn't just funny, it's also proof he's learned to see value in people in positions like Abshir's.

You can't understand the motivations behind Ed's actions, especially the violent ones, if you ignore the racist overtones. Ed is not a randomly violent person - he gets angry at a captain for calling him a "rich donkey," and if you think it's unreasonable for a brown man to want to get revenge on a white man for calling him that? Then fuck I'm glad you can't see the conversations I have with my other black friends, man. Ed's anger and frustration at the party aren't just because he fucked up with some spoons, lol, you can't get it unless you realize he's the only brown guest in that room. Yeah, he's ignoring Stede's advice, but he's immediately under a pressure Stede never has been. Ed's wanted posters in s2, too, rely on heavily caricaturizing Jewish features to make him look grotesque and monstruous. We're supposed to be horrified by that aspect.

And, yeah, when we ignore the racist tones to Izzy's behavior, I think that's undermining an important aspect of who he is as an antagonistic character. Him buying Ed from the English should feel like a gross violation, because it is. When he sits in front of the crew eating and making Fang and Ivan serve him, I think it's a pretty obvious parallel to how the crew members of color were similarly insulted in the pilot. It's impossible to ignore race in the way he dehumanizes Ed and tries to force him back into a caricature of behavior he hates and is horrified by - when he calls Ed a "wild dog" in s2, if that doesn't cause a visceral reaction of disgust in you, I dunno what to tell you. This doesn't mean that Izzy is irredeemable - just as Stede wasn't - but it does mean that racist biases are things Izzy had to unlearn.

OFMD so often takes so much care with how its characters of color are depicted. We get thoughtful, relatable moments (those French boat people getting humiliated and setting their boat on fire after they'd tried to touch Ed's beard is so satisfying, guys) and excellent, supportive friendships between men of color. The characters of color on OFMD are clean, smart, respected, and it's wonderful. And just because these things aren't always relatable to you specifically doesn't mean they're not important parts of the story.

[red5tars]

been cooking some pricegaz x reader concepts (and one primarily pricegaz) bcs of @/fulltacs

cw; pregnancy, oral mention (m receiving), hannigram mention, denial of homo-erotic relations, mentions of kidnapping and semi-dark themes.

1) price who is about to retire confessing to gaz he’s always seen him like a son. he also confesses that he wished he had grandkids, his (few) memories with his gran the only highlight from his childhood.

“little tyke runnin’ around, spoiling them to their hearts content, doesn’t that sound nice?”

and gaz, being the good man son he is decides to see his wish through. two months later, he shows up to price’s door with you on his arm. he never knew gaz had a partner (he doesn’t), but price could care less when gaz tells him he’s gonna be a ‘pop pop’

2) established pricegaz but it’s a secret considering it’s against the rules and also the (smallest) power imbalance. newly sergeant-ed you ends up catching them in the act. despite the wrongness of it all, you promise not to tell. it’s their business! and it isn’t hurting anyone! still, your words are not enough so why don’t you put that pretty mouth of yours on your captain’s rim while gaz works on his balls. show them that they can really trust you.

3) established pricegaz BUT price is not out to his friends or family which is fine because they don’t even visit his side that much. until they visit him. price would be your dad’s best friend in this scenario, opting to stay with him while you explore london. and though he knows how accepting you are, he doesn’t say anything, doesn’t let gaz say anything.

cut to gaz viciously flirting with you right in front of price bcs his partner refuses to tell reader in fear of embracing an essential aspect of his life.

4) bratrecruit!reader my beloved. idc if i talked about it before i’m going to talk about it again. i want to clean up that post but yeah just thinking you’re better than them and that you’re protected by your name. this is loosely based off of what @/yeyinde had to say about price’s background (ty lev <3) with him also being a nepo baby. having a nepo off. only thing is he has gaz and you don’t.

5) reader who divorced price and wants nothing to do with him only to be with his left hand man, gaz. don’t even know the two know each other but gaz knows everything about you. besides, price just told kyle what he wants for christmas, and you happen to be on the list.

6) reader who was constantly picked on by kyle when they were cadets, forced to discharge because it always went way over line but their co’s just called them ‘too weak’. fast forward years later when the two cross paths and reader is honestly worse for wear but gaz seems better (he isn’t). reader is on the verge of homelessness so when gaz asks if they’re okay they just.. break down. ends up with kyle allowing them to stay at his and price’s place, saying they have a guest bedroom.

(gaz who has always been way too obsessed with reader but his attempts at isolating them for himself pushed them metaphorically and physically away. however, he is presented with another go at this. price’ll understand, he knows how much kyle needs his toy)

7) hannigram au pricegaz but gaz is hannibal and price is will graham. idk i feel like price would be more likely to witness the horrors of his own mind while gaz just sits in the back sipping on his wine and chewing an arm.

[miracleonice87]

behind the scenes at 30 rock

part of the kissing kelce universe

a/n: the newest installment is here! takes place during Travis's SNL appearance. includes guest appearances from jason, mama and papa kelce, and kelsea ballerini. enjoy!

warnings: mention of pregnancy / related sickness / babies, alcohol, swearing, i think that's it

word count: ~4,000

___

March 5, 2023 

Travis was mere hours from hosting Saturday Night Live, the biggest honor of his entire life and career outside of football. 

And you? You were sitting alone in his green room – an appropriate name, considering how you were constantly green in the gills these days – being sick in a trash can. 

Travis was rehearsing on stage, along with Jason and the cast, while Donna, Ed, and Trav’s management team were being toured around the studio. You had hung back after muttering a lame excuse about needing to call home and walk your parents through how to record the show tonight. Donna had eyed you suspiciously but let it go… and the group left you alone just in time for you to cough up your guts moments after the door closed. 

The wave of sickness lasted for a good three or four minutes, and as you sat up weakly, pressing the inside of your wrist to your sweaty forehead before reaching into your purse for your breath spray, you wondered how the fuck you were going to clean this up without anyone noticing. With a groan, you reached for some paper towels, crumpling them up and shoving them into the bag of the offending trash can, then tied the cheap plastic bag tightly closed and put it in another empty trash bag which, thankfully, you found inside the can. Somehow, you kept the gagging to a minimum as you picked up the bundle of bags and walked toward the door, taking a deep breath in when you reached it.

This is so fucking embarrassing. 

You cracked the door open just far enough to call out to a young PA walking down the hallway. As he drew closer, you called sheepishly, “Excuse me?”

He whipped his head up and stood straight, not having noticed the partially open door until you spoke.

“Oh, Mrs. Kelce!” he said with a polite smile. “Yes, can I help you?”

You winced visibly. “Actually, yes,” you admitted softly. “Please know that I absolutely hate to do this, but… I was just, uh, sick, in here and… I was wondering if it was possible to get rid of this for me?” You held the bag up a few inches and smiled at him apologetically. “I swear I’m not drunk, I’m just, uh… I’m not feeling well.”

He nodded and gave you an understanding smile. 

“Not a problem, Mrs. Kelce,” he said, carefully reaching for the bag. “Trust me, I’ve dealt with much worse than this,” he said playfully, and you were grateful for his assistance and his attempt to make you feel better. “You let us know if you need anything else, alright?” 

“Thank you so much,” you said quietly. You read his nametag before continuing. “I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this, Jeremy. And, um, one more thing…”

He nodded again. “Anything.”

“Keep this between us?” you said softly, lifting an index finger to your lips.

Slowly, a knowing smirk stretched across his lips. “Of course,” he assured. “My lips are sealed.”

You nodded, mouthing a final “thank you.” You closed the door and rested your head against the cool frame, closing your eyes and exhaling slowly, relieved that that hadn’t been as painful as you’d feared, and making a mental note to send Jeremy some piece of memorabilia signed by Travis as a token of your gratitude. 

You jumped when, just a few moments later, a soft knock came on the other side of the door.

“One second!” you called, ducking into the view of the lighted mirror to check your appearance, reaching for a tissue to wipe at the corners of your mouth. 

“Hey, it’s Kelsea,” a voice said quietly. “Can I come in?”

You smiled. Not only was it Travis’s first time on SNL, but it was also the first appearance for the musical guest, Kelsea Ballerini, who just so happened to be one of your favorite artists and one of the most-played on your Spotify account. You had briefly met her earlier and were able to tell her what a big fan of hers you were, and you were thrilled that she was back again, presumably to chat or maybe to take a quick photo before the show.

“Yes, come in!” you called cheerfully as you cleared your throat and tossed the tissue into the trash from three-point range, plastering a mega-watt smile on your features as if nothing at all had happened in the last ten minutes. 

She opened the door wearing a sweats set and carrying one of the SNL bags given to each special guest, and you noticed her freshly finished hair and makeup – the final step before the show would be to change into her outfit, which was sure to be stunning.

As you were about to open your mouth to tell her how beautiful she looked already, she shut the door and said abruptly, “Are you okay?”

Your stomach fluttered, this time due to nerves and not the baby in your belly. 

How did she know?

You swallowed hard and tried your best to play it off. 

“Yeah, I’m fine!” you lied through your teeth with a wave of your hand. “Why do you ask?”

She smiled and shyly ducked her head before meeting your eyes again.

“Well, my boyfriend Chase was just walking past and overheard you talking to the PA about being sick…” You pursed your lips, trying as hard as you could to keep a grin from your face. Kelsea forged ahead. “Now, listen, you do not have to tell me if you don’t want to, of course, but… I doubt you’d be here at all if you had the stomach flu, and you don’t seem like you’ve had too much to drink, so…”

You chuckled quietly, then nodded. After a long pause, you copped. 

“We literally just found out a week ago…”

Kelsea covered her mouth as she screamed silently and began hopping from one foot to the other. 

“Oh, my god, oh, my god! Congratulations!” she whisper-yelled as she wrapped you in a warm hug. In your wildest dreams, you could have never guessed that Kelsea Ballerini would be the second person – well, technically the third, if Jeremy had in fact caught your drift – in the world whom you told that you were expecting. Kelsea pulled away and held you at arm’s length. “Okay, well, I’m glad I asked – I had a feeling so I brought ginger ale and Jolly Ranchers. That’s what helped one of my girlfriends through her whole first trimester.” 

She reached into the bag hanging from her forearm and produced said items, and you pressed a hand to your lips as tears pricked your eyes. 

“Sorry, ignore me!” you exclaimed, laughing as you accepted the items. “It’s the freaking hormones. But that is so sweet of you. Thank you. You did not have to do that – you have a show to prepare for!” 

She waved her hand nonchalantly. “I know, I know, but this is just girl code,” she said decidedly. “I’ll run back out there in a sec but I wanted to make sure you were okay. Here, sit, sit,” she insisted as she motioned toward the velvet couch. 

You did as you were instructed and happily screwed the cap off of the soda, taking a few small sips. The coolness and carbonation of the drink were a welcome sensation on your tongue. 

“So nobody else knows?” Kelsea whispered excitedly, scrunching her nose with glee. 

As you swallowed, you smiled. “No,” you whispered back, and Kelsea squealed. “I’m only six weeks. We’re gonna tell my brother- and sister-in-law and his parents tomorrow when we go to Philly to meet the new baby, but right now it’s just us who know. And you!” 

She clapped her fingertips together enthusiastically. “This is the coolest thing ever!” she exclaimed, tipping her head back. 

“Don’t tell Trav that you know!” you warned as you unrolled a watermelon Jolly Rancher and popped it into your mouth. “He won’t be upset, but then he’ll wonder how you found out, and he’s been so worried about how sick I’ve been. I mean, he tried to cancel this,” you explained, motioning generally around the room. 

Kelsea held up a hand. “I swear on my life – again, girl code,” she promised. “But what I am gonna do? Is tell my boyfriend to keep an eye on you during the show and get you an out if needed. I don’t need to tell him why – he’ll listen.” 

You reached to rest your hand on her knee, squeezing it affectionately. “Thank you, Kelsea,” you said sincerely. “I really appreciate it. I’d say we’d name our baby after you, but that might be a little weird.”

Kelsea burst into a fit of laughter. “Yeah, Kelsea Kelce might be a bit much,” she admitted. “We can workshop it though.”

You giggled, then took another sip of ginger ale.

“Think you’ll be okay to sit through this whole thing?” she asked as you reached for the bag of salt and vinegar chips you’d stashed in Travis’s bag as you were leaving the hotel earlier. 

You nodded. “Usually I’m okay for a few hours once I’ve eaten something. Today’s just been so crazy that I hadn’t even realized I hadn’t eaten enough. I can tell you that won’t happen again,” you told her as you popped a chip into your mouth.

Kelsea tutted. “Girl, I get it. I get hangry so easily, and I’m not even pregnant,” she confessed as you beamed. “Well, I’m gonna get out there, but I’m glad you’re hanging in there. And I’m so happy for you and Travis, truly – I know we just met but it’s not hard to see how much y’all love each other and love your family, and you’re gonna be amazing parents.” 

Tears welled in your eyes once more as you wrapped your free arm around Kelsea’s neck, and she hugged your waist. 

“Thank you,” you managed, voice watery. You sat back and cleared your throat. “Now, break a leg! No pressure, but you’re technically baby’s first concert.”

Kelsea gaped. “I didn’t even think of that!” she said giddily. “Oh, my god, I’m gonna turn it all the way on then.” 

___

Backstage, a few hours later, Kelsea and Travis locked eyes in the moments immediately following the end of the live taping and the chaos that ensued. Over her head, she pointed both index fingers at him, doing her best to make a beeline to him through the sea of cast, crew, family, and friends. Travis danced toward her as though he had just caught a touchdown in the corner of the end zone at Arrowhead. 

“You did it!” he exclaimed, booming voice echoing throughout the short distance between them.

As she finally reached him, she extended both hands to high-five him, then the two embraced giddily. 

“We did it!” she shouted back, clapping him on the back. “You absolutely killed it out there!” 

Travis pulled back to point at Kelsea. “You were amazing,” he praised. “You sounded incredible!”

“Thank you, thank you,” she said, bowing playfully. “God, what a night!”

Travis rubbed his palms together. “What a fucking night indeed,” he concurred. “Now it’s time to celebrate – I’m gonna go find my family and get this freakin’ makeup off,” he laughed, then looked at her pointedly. “See you and Chase at the afterparty?”

Kelsea looked at him as though he were crazy. “Are you kidding? We’ll be there with bells on. I’ll meet you for shots in twenty,” she assured, then her expression grew more serious, and she leaned up to speak into Travis’s ear quietly enough so that no one could hear. “Just make sure you check on wifey first – and make sure she eats something before we go out.”

As Kelsea took a step back, Travis eyed her in disbelief. 

“Wait, how did you-”

Kelsea pressed an index finger to her lips. 

“I’m sworn to secrecy – girl code,” she whispered. Then, as she backed away, she mouthed, “congratulations.” 

He shook his head, a bashful smile on his face, and mouthed back, “thank you.”

___

Another hour into the night, after Travis had made sure you had your fill of the Chinese takeout he’d made certain to have a PA deliver to you right after the show, you were watching him hold court in the middle of Mermaid Oyster Bar in Times Square, simultaneously amused by and in awe of the way he was being doted upon as king of the city, even if just for the night. The poignance and ferocity of your first hug upon finding him after the show rivaled the embraces shared between the two of you after both Super Bowl victories, after your wedding vows, and, most recently, upon finding out you were expecting. 

But never in any of those sacred moments had you been so fucking tired as you were right now. Fighting against the exhaustion that threatened to overpower you at any moment as you watched Travis in a daze, you hid a yawn behind your palm and blinked furiously. In the corner of your private booth reserved for family, Donna sat sipping her cocktail, eyes never leaving you. When Ed got up from the table to meet someone at Jason’s behest, Donna scooted closer to you, leaning in so that she could be heard above the thumping music. 

“We should do a tequila shot together – I know it’s your favorite, and it’s a special occasion!” she suggested, nudging your shoulder with hers. 

You threw her a smile which you hoped wasn’t riddled with the anxiety you felt at the proposition. 

“You’re crazy!” you accused in jest. “It’s been such a long day, I’ll fall asleep if I take a shot.”

Donna nodded decisively, took a generous sip of her drink, and placed her hand atop yours on the table, studying you. 

“You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”

“Mom!” you suddenly heard from behind you, the single syllable tinged with a familiar northeast Ohio accent, and you and Donna both turned your heads to find her youngest son gaping at you, blue eyes wide with bewilderment and lips parted. “What the fuck?!” he spat as he hurried around to the front of the booth.

Donna guffawed. “Well, now I definitely have my answer!” she said, smacking the table gleefully before throwing her arms around you. “Congratulations, honey!” she exclaimed, kissing your cheek. “Oh, I’m so happy for you!” She reached for Travis’s hand as he tucked into the seat next to you, and you leaned against the table to allow mother and son as much space as possible to embrace behind you in the cramped booth.

“What’s happening?” Jason questioned as he approached alongside Ed, his signature brows furrowed as he looked at you accusingly. Travis and Donna parted and turned their attention to the other two Kelces. You pursed your lips before bursting into nervous laughter. 

“Well… our mother just accused this one of being pregnant,” Travis announced, wrapping an arm tightly around your shoulders as you offered a playful wave, watching Jason’s eyebrows shoot straight up, his color draining from his face at the perceived uncomfortable moment. “And as only Mom could be, she was 100% correct in that assumption.”

“Ayyyy-yyy-yyy!” Jason erupted, throwing his arms into the air before slinging them around both you and Travis at the same time, as Ed clapped in the background. “That’s fucking amazing! Oh my god!” 

As Jason made space for Ed to congratulate the two of you, Donna put a finger in the air. 

“I want to make it clear that I did not ask based on her weight or appearance or anything of the sort,” she insisted, one hand flush to her chest as if reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. “I only asked because she turned down a tequila shot for the first time in the many years that I have known her.”

Jason and Ed cackled, and Travis drew you even closer into his side. 

“Alright nah! That’s my girl,” he joked, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Only eight more months until your next one, sweetness.”

“That is very unlike her, I’ll give you that,” Ed concurred. “So, when are you due, sweetheart?”

You looked up at Travis and shared an elated grin. “Uh, November 6!” you announced. “It’s early – we only just found out last week.”

As Donna clapped furiously and Ed nodded, beaming, Jason held up both hands.

“Hold on, hold on, hold on… isn’t that the first day of Travis’s bye?” he asked incredulously. 

You nodded happily as Travis bobbled his head from side to side, pride and euphoria radiating from him, especially in his alcohol-flooded state. Jason stood still as a statue, gaping. “This is insane! You’re probably gonna get to be with her and the baby for, like, multiple days and not have to work or go anywhere,” he pointed out.

Travis nodded knowingly. “You’re goddang right, brotha – everything’s coming up Kelce! Ha haaa!”

Jason chuckled. “You’re unbelievable,” he said, shaking his head. “But shit, am I happy for you guys! Oh, my god, Ky’s gonna flip!”

Travis squeezed your bicep and implored, “Jason, please do not go back to your hotel and drunkenly call her, okay? We’ve been planning to wait and tell her in person tomorrow when we get to your house to meet Benny, which is when we were gonna tell all of you, but apparently Mom had other plans!” 

Jason crossed his heart. “Um, you might have to take my phone away from me to make sure that doesn’t happen, but I promise I won’t do it on purpose.”

___

You somehow managed to stay awake until four in the morning, largely thanks to the advice Jason had received from Rich Eisen to sleep in for as long as possible that morning in order to prep for the wild night after the show, but you realized you had finally hit your wall when the crew was ready to head to another location and you were not. Travis pulled you into his chest while the group discussed the route to the next party, his big hands resting on your lower back to keep you close. He ducked his head to speak into your ear, as private a conversation as could be managed in the midst of a gaggle of people.

“I don’t think I’m gonna go,” he said simply. 

You shot him a “yeah fucking right” look and immediately shook your head. “No, baby, you’re going – that’s not even a question,” you argued, smoothing a hand across his broad chest. “I’m gonna head back and get some sleep, you’re gonna stay out as late as you can keep your eyes open, and that’s final,” you said, poking him in the sternum. 

His fingers ghosted up and down your spine as you spoke, and he smirked in amusement, knowing better than to continue to fight you on this. 

“Are you absolutely certain?” he asked. “Because you just say the word and I swear to god, we turn around and walk out that door and go back together right now.” 

You shook your head again, toying with his silver chain. “Absolutely not, Trav,” you reiterated. “I’m certain. This is a once-in-a-lifetime deal, and you’re gonna enjoy every second of it. And to be frank, I’m gonna pass out the moment my head hits the pillow, so it’s not gonna make a difference to me whether you’re there or not. Until morning, and you can go back to holding my hair back for me.” 

Travis giggled, and his long arms wrapped you in an all-consuming hug as he buried a kiss in your hair. “Gladly,” he stated, and you knew he meant it. He dropped another kiss to your forehead and added, “I love you so bad.”

You hummed appreciatively and tipped your head up to peck his lips. “I love you so bad,” you echoed. “This has been incredible, watching you shine. You were amazing, babe. I’m so proud of you.” 

The humility and delight in his eyes was overwhelming, and he cradled the back of your head to thank you with a passionate kiss, the kind usually reserved for private spaces. But this was a special occasion, not to mention how much alcohol your husband had consumed by this point, so you simply smiled against his lips until he pulled away for air. 

“Couldn’t have done it without you, my girl,” he said warmly. “Be safe. Text me when you’re in. I’ll see you soon.”

You nodded, squeezing his waist. 

“I will,” you promised. “Have a ball, 87.” 

_____

But truth be told, Travis did not have a ball once you had left him. Admittedly, he had watched your location on his phone incessantly while you traveled the short distance from the Mermaid back to your hotel, grateful that his mom had accompanied you, having had enough of the party for the night herself. Once he had watched the blue dot representing you reach the front of the hotel, then become stagnant once you had apparently reached your room and minutes later texted him “made it back, getting ready for bed - love you ❤️”, he tried his damnedest to focus on being present and enjoying himself, reminding him that this night was special, just as you’d said. 

But with every drink that was poured down his throat, with every celebrity he tried his best to entertain, with every introduction by somebody he was supposed to recognize to somebody else he was supposed to recognize, his thoughts were always, only, with you – whether you were asleep yet, how you were sleeping if so, if you had had enough to eat, how you were feeling. He’d spent so much time away from you this week because of the rigorous schedule of meetings and rehearsals that he just missed you with every fiber of his being – he swore it had to be biological, because anyone who knew Travis Kelce knew that he loved a party, especially one celebrating him. Though he’d never quite felt this way before, his heart simply wasn’t in it. 

Around 5 in the morning, he locked eyes with Jason and gave him the high sign, hand gesturing at his neck to indicate that he’d had his fill of the SNL pandemonium. Jason gave a knowing smile and nod, well aware of what was coming next – an Irish exit by his younger brother. Travis knew he would be there for another hour if he attempted to say goodbye to each and every person at the party, even just the ones he knew personally, and with his one-track mind focused solely on his exhausted pregnant wife back in his suite, he made the executive decision to dip out through a side door near the bathrooms. He quickly made his way to the car waiting for him, shared a nod with the driver, and climbed into the backseat. 

“How you doin’, man? Back to the hotel, please,” he requested. 

“Of course, Mr. Kelce,” the driver replied. “Do you need to make any stops first?”

Travis smiled softly and shook his head. “Not a one – thank you.” 

Finally, after what had to be the longest day of his life, he snuck back into the hotel unnoticed thanks to the accommodating staff, slipped in the door to the penthouse suite, quickly shed his outfit leaving on only his boxers, and snuggled into bed behind you, pressing his chest against your back. At his familiar touch and scent, you inhaled deeply and moaned softly, glancing over your shoulder and throwing him a sleepy smile.

“Hey, superstar, you made it back,” you greeted him, voice raspy and thick with sleep as your head dropped back to the pillow.

“Mmhmm, and I have been dreaming of this all day long,” he whispered, kissing a line from your shoulderblade, up your neck, along your jaw and ending at your temple. “Go back to sleep, sweet thing. I gotchu.” 

“Mmm, ‘kay. Love you, Trav,” you all but slurred, instantly slipping back into your slumber. 

He smiled so big it hurt his face, completely, wholly, overwhelmingly, blissfully content as his hand settled on your lower stomach where a baby bump was still weeks from appearing, your warm fingers lazily covering his. 

“I love you, mama.”

[sugar-crash]

🍬King Candy (Wreck-It Ralph) x (gn) Reader👑

(Beginning Relationship Pt. I Edition!)

(I thought this song would be fitting considering King Candy’s voice is based on the vocal performance Ed Wynn did for the Mad Hatter… That and its… Nostalgic🔑 [I saw the animation meme culture rise and fall.] lol)

- So, as we all know, the more unpleasant parts of his personality (which could tie him to Turbo) are suppressed, and hidden, though they can still peak out when he’s feeling particularly malicious.

- He’s a slime, a real manipulative rat who’s so sure he can keep everyone in the dark, who takes it slow with you at first to try to maintain his hard work.

- There’s a clear wall between what he displays in front of others and how he is, just the way he likes it, but honestly— If you mean so much to him, you get a weird mix of the two (well, more than usual), a kind of sweet goofiness that’s followed up with a snide remark about being the most skilled in some specific topic.

- Again he’s not the best lover, though from his previous indiscretions he has learned to be more open to others feelings— But only for your sake, mostly cause he can’t stand anyone else besides you…. And Sour Bill sometimes, but he’s mostly the personification of a minimum wage worker.

- Spending time together after hours is a must, though he’s more understanding now than he was before, not demanding every moment of your time but relishing whenever you do.

- I think all that time alone before Sugar Rush got plugged in made him lonely, and less stubborn to admit that he wants that comfort from someone else.

- I don’t think it’s much of a far reach when I say maintaining the King Candy persona is something he is very fluid in, but it’s exhausting at times.

- When he gets that seldom time alone without any of his kingly duties he finds himself yearning for your comforting touch, that stubbornness making way as he makes Sour Bill retrieve you.

- I can see moments between the two of you to be on the tamer side, not as many arguments like Pre-RoadBlasters, little to none really, but there are these tense moments where you ask him something a little too close to home and he becomes stiff in your arms if only for a brief moment.

- As much as he wants to be, not only for himself but maybe even you— He isn’t perfect, he isn’t the person he tries so hard to be, that gleeful and peppy voice going flat the second he isn’t feeling it anymore.

- It becomes apparent the more you know him he’s far more serious than he lets on, puffing his chest up slightly when things don’t go his way and he has to play dirty, which he’s certainly no stranger to...

- In comparison to himself when the arcade first ever opened, he’s certainly grown from that childish hatred, for better and for worse.

- He’s more affectionate for one, providing you with comfort fitting to how you are feeling at that moment, little compliments, and gestures of affection to quell your anger and anxiety in a matter of seconds.

- Quick to learn every little thing about you to make sure he’s able to relate to you, though his intentions with this information go back and forth.

- He wants everything on a silver platter, not only for himself but also for you, making the other subjects of Sugar Rush bend over backward for you, even when you object to all the attention.

- I think one of the ways he dotes on you in a way is date planning, various areas in Sugar Rush vary which can be very nice date spots… He seems like the picnic blanket and tea liker as King Candy, as stereotypical as that is lol.

- Though if that isn’t your style, he can always do dates at the castle, like baking— chatting the night away, it’s the simple things in life <3

- Even with his character growth he is far from a good person, which we all know and love for the most part. He’s fully aware that the things he does to bar you, Venallope, the Sugar Rush inhabitants, and even the arcade entirely is cruel, spiteful even. But what could he have done? Let himself fade into obscurity and be characterized after one of his biggest mistakes?

- No, no, not when he still has so much to provide— He’s a person, just like everyone else, better yet he was programmed to be better. Why should he stand aside and let the world spin without him? Why should he look at you from afar when he has every right to want you?

- That’s part of the reason why he’s so adamant about keeping his spot as the monarch of Sugar Rush, he’s the rightful ruler after all.

(Cr cqh’r lncp, hjw cq cr?)

[deakwithit]

how can someone look me in the eye and tell me oswald doesnt have bpd guys pleaswe this shouldnt even be up for discussion....

i have bpd and ive never related to a character more, especially this scene

the ranting, taking everything personally (despite the context of the scene being a pretty obvious personal thing), the anger, spilling something and ed having to tell him to breathe (which, also implies this happens a lot, especially with ed's slightly annoyed tone).

in many other scenes, ESPECIALLY ones with isabella, it clearly shows him displaying traits of bpd and time n time again i see "hes crazy" or "hes a sociopath" (which makes no sense and is just ableist)

hes someone with likely multiple complex mental disorders, but bpd especially sticks out to me bc of how obvious his case is

like i was sitting there watching the isabella dilemma thinking "man hes so me" bc he was splitting just as violently as i do

and as someone with multiple complex mental disorders, i fantasize about killing people i split on too (he actually does it, i dont, but i understand it). ive had homicidal thoughts (not urges, thoughts, clear distinction guys im not gonna murder someone) about the people ive split on, ive thought about the things oswald does, though not as cartoony as some of his, considering theyre in a fictional universe.

i fully belive edward was not oswalds first fp either, his mom to me is the first who comes to mind as his attachment figure, the only person he can rely on, his favorite person but also in a way his only person. she gave him love, gave him care, gave him all he needed to survive, and oswald clung onto it.

edward gave him "love", attention, care, and after oswalds mom had been gone, he needed that. so he needed edward. boom, fp moment

we constantly see how emotionally invested oswald is in ed, how much he cares for him, how much edwards words control his emotions, and we see how he once again, violently splits on someone, but for the first time, its on the one he "replaced" his mom with.

i wqont even lie i might be lowkey headcanoning some of this maybe or making shit up cause i havent watched gotham in a long time but oswald so clearly struggles with emotional regulation and anger. its 0-100, its black and white, its night and day, he is always overcome by his emotions. the way he yells and rants with ed in the scene i shared, the way he felt learning mr penn had betrayed him, the way he felt when his mom died, the way he felt about edward, or even isabella, is so clearly the way someone w bpd, such as myself, would react.

anyway im crazy idk share ur thoughts

[triflesandparsnips]

I read this post by @notebooks-and-laptops about Stede knowing who Ed is, and therefore not being surprised by what happened to him-- and I agree, hooboy do I agree-- but I also wonder if... I wonder if Stede also knows because...

Stede and Ed are different men, right? They occupy the world in different ways, and they find different solutions to live in that world because of it.

But. Remember:

"You ever feel trapped? Like you're just treading water, waiting to drown?"

"Yes. I have... I very much have felt that way--"

They're different people, with different life experiences that lend different solutions to the problems they face, and in a story that wasn't a love story-- in a story that wasn't about finally finding a person who understands-- maybe that ask (do you ever feel--?) and that answer (yes) wouldn't mean as much.

But this is a love story. Or, more accurately, a love story. Because--

Because they're different people but they feel the same-- and I don't mean in relation to the other, or reciprocity, or any of the nicer, more true-to-life kinds of ways of describing love. I mean-- this is kismet stuff, this is one soul the gods split into two bodies, this is the unnerving tragedy of being narrative devices created to explore a theme (a lot of what we’re taught about being a man is wrong) and being wound up and set down in a narrative to see what happens-- and so one of the questions the story asks us is: what does it mean if this man, from a wealthy world of privilege, and this man, from a lawless world of danger-- what does it mean when they feel the same.

And what I think it means-- what these three episodes and the last from season 1 are showing us-- is that while they feel the same, it looks very different when they each finally break.

Ed's version of watch the world burn or die trying was to dig down into piracy so hard and so viciously that the only way out was death-- we see that now.

But Stede's version-- we saw Stede's version. We started the show with Stede's version. When Stede watches the world burn or die trying-- he left his life, his family, he burned his bridge back to that world in the first episode when he claimed the Badminton kill and he dug down into a pirate identity so deeply that he was stabbed and hanged for it before he ever even met Edward Teach.

Stede was drowning for decades, and in a few short months he burned the world to find an escape and died trying to achieve it.

So Stede knows Ed, oh yes. And he loves him. But I wonder if this moment in season 2 isn't about knowing Ed's mind because this is a story about love and acceptance-- I wonder if it's because this is a story where parallels are everything, where the exploration of how they react differently to the same plot is half the point, where--

--Where Stede can look at what Edward has done and instantly see himself.

[sixstepsaway]

I don't get why people want to pretend Ed wasn't abusive. Why do people insist on making everything into binaries? Yes, Ed has been a victim of abuse. Yes, he has been abusive. Both things can be true. I love him because I think he's in interesting and I understand where his pain is coming from (even if I think S2 was a missed opportunity in terms of character development). But anyway, thank you for writing about this because maybe some folks genuinely don't recognize abusive trends.

I think it has a lot to do with the fandom culture of only being allowed to like "wholesome" ships.

Look at it this way: when season 1 was airing, Ed and Stede were, in fact, very wholesome. Sure, they had some moments of lesser wholesomeness, but overall they were pretty wholesome and sweet and gentle. They were sweet and finding love in middle age and it was adorable. They had a general stamp of fandom approval that they were, in fact, Wholesome And Good To Ship™.

If you look at other fandoms, you'll see a lot of times there's the Good And Acceptable Ship and then there's the Bad Ship (or ships) and the Bad Ship is always slapped with the "oh that's actually incest!" label when they've, idk, grown up together, or "oh it's abusive!" because one of them one time made a bad joke or something, or "power dynamics!" because one is 27 and one is 25 or one is short and the other is tall or whatever, and yeah sometimes the Bad Ship is actually toxic or whatever (which is not a reason to not ship and enjoy it!), but they're put in neat little boxes: Good and Bad.

And for a lot of people, those boxes keep them safe. Last year, someone who was an Izzy Hands fan got doxxed because...? They liked Izzy Hands and shipped him with... I don't know actually. Ed? Stede? It doesn't matter, all I know is they got doxxed.

The side of fandom that thinks you should only ship the Good Ship are toxic and downright dangerous. It's happened again and again in numerous fandoms and just keeps happening.

So when at the end of s1, Ed turned around and cut Izzy's toe off and fed it to him, I think a lot of people panicked because shit, now Ed was Bad too, and if he's Bad then you can't like him or relate to him or ship him with the Good guy of Stede, so what the fuck do you do?

Obvious answer: Blame Izzy. Izzy's already classed as Bad, so put all the responsibility on Izzy for Ed's darkness and then it's safe to ship Ed and Stede again and no one can call you an abuse apologist or whatever for liking them together.

(To be clear: Shipping says nothing about your real morality. This is very clear for many reasons, one of which is... spend thirty seconds watching fans of the Wholesome Ships dox people and abuse people online lol)

So they spent all this time saying Ed was just scared and lashing out, and now s2 has come along and Ed is... well, abusive, canonically.

And for most of us, that doesn't really matter. We can still enjoy Ed and Stede or Ed and Izzy, we can throw ourselves into fanworks and enjoy the show for the things we like, and we can critique the things we have issues with (my problem is not Ed being written as dark and twisty and having a villain arc, my problem is the show writing it badly, exploring it badly, and then handwaving it, because it's shitty writing) and still really enjoy the vibes we got from the show.

But for people who are scared because they spent all this time saying Izzy fans should kill themselves for liking an abuser, well... now they have a choice: either admit Ed is an abuser and admit that liking a character doesn't dictate your irl morality, nor does it say anything about you aside from what you enjoy in fiction, or excuse away his actions, insist he's just a lil meow meow and continue feeling safe in their little bubble.

In a lot of ways I can't blame people for wanting to duck and cover from it. I mean, look at the shit people get for liking characters who aren't perfect, or talking about the imperfections of characters, or just enjoying complex narratives!

But what genuinely concerns me isn't anything to do with the fiction really, it's when people look at Ed's behavior in 2x01 and 2x02 and go, "Nah he's fine," because oh, honey, no, you are making yourself so vulnerable to real life abuse. That is what worries me, which is why I answered that one ask saying Ed wasn't abusive, it felt important to point out why he is.

Anyway, that's what I think is happening here. I think people are just scared that if they admit their fave has multitudes and isn't a perfect character who never does any wrong, they'll get doxxed and abused and harassed online.

I get that.

[allthegothihopgirls]

I love the asexual Bruce Wayne agenda and I totally agree with it. What I want to know though is how Bruce (asexual queen that he his) deals with his hormonal teenage boys?

Cause like Bruce never got the sex talk (I mean his parents died when he was young, and the family Buttler is Not giving his former employers son the sex talk) and that’s fine by Bruce. Cause he’s never felt these ‘urges’ that everyone talks about. Honestly, sex is overrated.

But, Batman prepares for everything. And one thing that people ALWAYS stress about parenting is having to give your kids the sex talk.

I just really want to know about the hijinks like;

Bruce: *Standing forlornly in front of a ‘Sex Ed’ PowerPoint* So, I understand that you probably have no desire for these… urges. That everyone talks about. But the parenting book (and society) decrees that to be a good parent, I need to give my children a proper education on sex.

Dick: *Very much not asexual* Yeah, no thanks dad this really helps!

Bruce: *Bewildered* How???

although the idea of bruce uncomfortably giving his version of a 'talk' is amusing, i don't think he'd give one at all. none of the boys would really give him any reason to, until he gets to tim at least (he's like, the only one i haven't fully projected my asexual agenda onto at this point).

dick's always been very responsible, so when he starts dating, maaaaybe bruce has like, a single thought contemplating whether or not to sit him down, but i think he'd get off with a "you know that you should always treat a woman right, yeah?" whether dick's actually dating women is up for debate but you get the point and a pat on the back. i believe that bruce operates predominantly under the 'if they have questions, they'll ask' mindset, so he trusts that if dick needs an answer to something, he'll come to bruce. (or just source an answer elsewhere)

i do also think that if anything, alfred would be the one to pull bruce up and ask if he'd adequately informed the boys of things 'one on one' (because he KNOWS that he hasn't). and even then, if bruce were to actually sit dick down, he wouldn't get so far as an introduction spent dancing around the topic because bruce is himself, mortified, before dick stops him and says that he doesn't have to give him this talk, because "wally already did" (much to bruce's disapproval).

as for jason, dying isn't great for a guy's love life. as i pretty much said previously, i don't think bruce would approach anything until it was absolutely relevant (when the boys are already in a relationship). so jason not getting a chance to really date before he died, means that bruce never had the opportunity to talk to him about it. i also believe he'd assume that jason already knows, with the crude jokes he makes, and the kind of people he grew up around on the streets. and obviously, by the time he comes back as red hood, he's too old to 'not know' and it's just presumed he knows his stuff.

i think tim might cause him a little bit (a lot) of trouble though. it definitely scares the shit out of bruce when he finds out about steph getting pregnant by her ex. it prompts him to fling fully into action mode to prevent tim ever being in that situation. that'd be the first time he's properly spoken to one of his kids about it, lots of emphasis on protection and what NOT to do.

however for any other talk pre-steph, i really do think he'd try to palm off the responsibility onto dick (he's very thankful that he's got kids old enough to do it for him), asking him to talk to tim. bruce would probably pull out all the cards "i'm too old" "he'd think it was less weird coming from you" "i don't know what you kids get up to, he's better off hearing it from someone who he can relate to" "i don't want to traumatise the kid" etc etc.

i do think the whole steph situation would be a bit of a reality-check for bruce though, and he'd have the realisation "that could have been any one of the kids" and he would be on his toes for a bit. especially with the amount of girls tim is rumoured to have relations with. him getting with bernard would be a big relief for everyone bruce i think.

once again when he gets with bernard, bruce is 100% palming off the responsibility of having that talk, onto one of his other kids. most likely jason. this is getting super far into my own personal headcanon territory, but literally none of them are straight to me, and i think jason would be the most 'comfortably' gay (mostly just his lack of care about the subject, being percieved as open-ness). bruce would 100% ask dick to talk to tim if it weren't for how private he tends to be with his love life in adulthood. (even getting him to just have the general 'talk' with tim was pushing it)

i don't think he'd ever talk with damian, the league definitely taught him (although objectively). i do think out of all the kids, he'd be the one to have questions though, mainly about the romantic aspect of relationships, as he struggles to wrap his head around the concept of 'love', (which really tests bruce's parenting abilities) i do think dick (having the bond he does with damian) would go out of his way to have a talk with him as he got older though.

as for cass, i don't think she would have ever been taught, with her irregular upbringing, as well as not going to regular school and all. but girls are new in the batfamily, and bruce doesn't want to touch that conversation with a ten-foot pole, so he calls diana in to do it for him.

final note, i also really do think a large contributing factor to bruce most likely never approaching the subject out of his own free will is just how private they all tend to be with their love lives. like i can see dick telling bruce that he's dating someone (as a teenager), but apart from a name and how he knows them, he's not really giving much else away. jason on the other hand just completely leaves it up for everyone else to figure out on their own (it lives entirely in my head that he's like this with his family, but is super close with his partner's family, which is a shock to everyone). if anything, tim's the only one who ever wants people to know about his relationships, for them to 'meet the parents' (bruce) etc etc. it probably all stems from bruce himself being a pretty secretive guy.

[beanghostprincess]

Sanji has helped me in so many ways. I will forever be grateful for the creation of this character. He quite literally means the world to me right now.

(TW: ED/Depression/Suicide attempt mention)

I've always struggled with food. Well, not always. But at the end of middle school (more or less. Give or take. Age 12/13) I became obsessed with what I ate. I still don't know exactly how it started, but I think it has always been a mix of my need to control my life when it's crumbling down and the necessity to look skinny (both things are my mother's fault, mostly. And also lots of things going on at the moment). So I started skipping meals constantly and throwing away food and throwing up. Not gonna get into details, but it ruined my life without anybody knowing until a huge depressive episode came and then I tried to off myself, yadda yadda yadda. Then I just stopped eating food and my meals every day were basically a monster and gum and maybe a piece of fruit. I couldn't even drink milk without crying. Then it got a bit better. Then a bit worse. It wasn't very consistent. And then I started doing exercise but that only made me even more obsessed with calorie intake and healthy food and I still can't drink milk or bread without at least feeling awful about it.

And then I watched One Piece.

I know it sounds extremely silly and dumb, but it has helped me in so many ways. I'm not gonna get into all the things it has done for me, because then I'd have to talk about Robin, Nami, Luffy, Pudding and Buggy which are, like, the characters that have helped me the most next to Sanji, and I would not finish this post.

But Sanji is just so, so important to me.

He speaks about food with such passion. His whole thing about not wasting food literally comes from an experience of starvation and because of the sacrifice his father made for him. He keeps saying he refuses to let people go hungry, no matter what. That we all deserve to eat. He relates food to love and cooking is his whole life. It kind of started as a joke when my brother said "nooo, now you can't waste food because Sanji would be sad" and I- That day I literally ate wayyy more than usual with that thought in mind. And I didn't feel bad afterward for once. And he's just- He just makes me feel so comfortable around food. Which is the normal amount of comfort somebody should have and sometimes it's not even that, but it helps. It helps so much.

Then his whole thing with Germa and the Vinsmokes. It killed me. My relationship with my mother is, uh, you can call it complicated but I fucking hate her so. Yeah. And Sanji's story about rejecting his blood relatives and finding better people who will love him hit so close to home. Him being different. Weak. More emotional. A good person. Sanji refusing to use the name Vinsmoke. It's my whole life. Sanji self-sabotaging himself all the time and constantly sacrificing himself, too? I just can't do it, man, he means the world to me. And then Wano happens and he turns out to have the same body as his siblings but he's still himself. He's still Sanji no matter how much in common he has with the Vinsmokes. And as somebody who's constantly dealing with people telling them that they look like their mom? I fucking love it. I know I look like her and I even act like her sometimes but that doesn't mean I am her. And it doesn't mean she deserves to be part of my family, because she isn't and I can't wait to get rid of her in my life.

It's not only food and family, though. Sanji has helped me accept myself in so many ways too. In the way I perceive others and in the way I act. He has helped me eat. He has helped me realize you don't have to consider your blood relatives family if you don't love them. He has helped me see that my kindness is a strength and not a weak spot.

Not to mention that his whole thing with gender and sexuality, how the fandom portrays him, and how I personally write him has been of so much help in understanding myself. I recently discovered I was a lesbian, and also being genderfluid I just- I just love Sanji so much I be projecting my gender issues and internalized stuff with comphet on him. And let me tell you, it helps.

This whole thing is just something short and sweet I wanted to say because media affects people. In the best of ways. One Piece in general has saved my life in many ways, but Sanji in particular is still helping me every day.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

I think the most interesting thing about Izzy in season 1 and early in season 2 is he so strongly considers himself someone who Understands Ed, but this not only isn't true, the more we take him at face value, the crueller his actions become.

Now, obviously, I do not think Izzy actually understands Ed very much at all. He thinks he does, at first! But he consistently fails to understand what makes Ed tick. He's so focused on his perception of Ed, which he's convinced is correct and right, that he can't see past it.

Izzy thinks that Ed is erratic and unpredictable, someone who is capable of great things but in need of being controlled. He consistently interprets Ed's behavior as insane and fickle, and Izzy himself is the force that can shape Ed's behavior into genius. He's so convinced in s1e4 that Ed is just wasting time and dicking around that he spends the whole episode nagging at him to come up with a plan, never once questioning his own unshakable belief that Ed, an extremely gifted sailor, starting to point out something to him in the clouds was just Ed fucking around. He is utterly convinced that Ed will not be able to get anything done if Izzy himself isn't right there making sure he stays on-task, when it's pretty obvious that Ed had his plan worked out from the start of the episode.

The nice thing is that Izzy is self-aware enough by the end of the show to apologize Ed for being abusive towards him for years. But this also means that he knew he was doing something wrong - he says on his deathbed that he knew Ed had long outgrown Blackbeard but he kept pushing anyway, because Izzy's whole deal in s1 is a chase for power. Being the one in control of Ed, feeling like Blackbeard was "us," it gave him that power - even if he wasn't, in truth, actually contributing anything other than stress.

I'm inclined to believe that Izzy understands as little as possible about Ed, because that makes Izzy's growth sit easier with me (he doesn't know about Ed's dad, obviously, but if he's somehow pieced together Ed's trauma related to killing, for example, then trying to get him to kill Stede becomes so much worse). But when he admits that he knew how much he was hurting Ed, that still makes everything in season 1 harder to swallow. It's still pretty clear Izzy doesn't understand Ed well, but he still did things like push Ed hard to kill Stede and threaten Ed at the end of s1 knowing that he was hurting Ed. Izzy's style of manipulating Ed isn't neat, it's quantity-over-quality, pushing over and over to hit the right notes until he gets a reaction, but he still knew Ed well enough to know he was being terrible to him for years (in his own words!).

And that's where arguments like "Izzy was just doing it because he thought he was doing what was right for Ed/because he loved Ed" start to fall apart for me, because not only does Izzy himself pretty clearly state on his deathbed that he was self-serving more than anything, but that's worse. I don't doubt that it's true! To be very clear, I think Izzy did think those things! Izzy doesn't know Ed on the level Stede knows Ed, he doesn't get him, but he knew him well enough to hit him where it really hurt. And that's worse than if he'd done the exact same things never understanding anything about Ed at all.

[erinelliotc]

What do you like about Eddy? Do you really think him and Double D will work out?

I think Eddy is the most interesting, deep, complex and well-written character on the show. It seems contradictory to say this, but even though Double D is my favorite character, I think Eddy is the best character. He's full of content for psychological analyses, something I'm passionate about doing because I love psychology and writing, I love analyzing human behavior, so complicated characters like Eddy are perfect to me in that sense (just as I am fascinated by Jinx from Arcane). I have so much to say about Eddy, I feel like every day I think of something new about his character, and I find this so exciting!

My analyses of each Ed will only be done in the future after I rewatch the show another two or three times, so I won't write here everything I have to say about Eddy. But you can find some of my EEnE analyses by scrolling through the posts in this tag. I talk about him in some of them.

But about Eddy and Double D... EddEddy is my OTP, you know? I've already talked a lot about them, and of course I'm going to talk much more in the future too. You can read a little about what I think of their relationship here.

In "short":

Eddy's backstory and his character development fascinate me. Characters who are emotionally broken to the point of developing a problematic personality fascinate me. Characters with mental disorders or traits of mental disorders fascinate me (I personally see him as ADHD with borderline and narcissistic traits, and perhaps a bit of histrionic traits too). I love analyzing and understanding what led them to that point, what made them so difficult to deal with, what hurt them so much that they developed an emotional armor and/or that makes them act like selfish jerks. The way Eddy's brain works fascinates me, his behavior, his defense mechanisms, everything. And to me the best part is seeing the little moments where the show shows us how he actually has a terrible self-image deep down and is not as confident and secure as he tries to show himself to be. I love seeing a character who isn't just a jerk, but someone who acts like a jerk because of things that happened that he tries to hide or that he doesn't even understand or realize happened (Eddy's reality denial defense mechanism is very strong, so I think a lot of the things related to his brother he genuinely didn't realize were problematic and had hurt him because his brain denied them to protect him. And it's common for our brain to block memories as a way of protecting us from the truth because it thinks we'll not have the emotional structure to deal with it, and I believe it may have happened to him), someone who is deeply hurt and does everything he can to hide it, someone who doesn't want to be emotionally vulnerable and tries to act like the most confident person in the world... Characters like this are the most interesting to me. And besides, I find Eddy extremely funny and annoying in an adorable way. I love his chaotic behavior, his voice and the way he talks (God bless Tony Sampson)

He and Edd were made for each other. Would they kill each other if Ed wasn't around? Absolutely. But their relationship is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen and the combination of their personalities is what makes them grow and have their character development. They mature and improve because of the influence they have on each other. Their personalities complement each other perfectly because one is good where the other has to improve. And the love and affection they have for each other is visible and makes me emotional

[ppeonppeonhan]

Songs That Remind Me of BL Characters & Couples

@zimmbzon kindly tagged me in their post, prompting me to share the first ten songs in my On Repeat playlist. Highly recommend checking theirs out, because mine is...rather basic. And becauuuuse it's basic, I'm gonna add another layer to this and tell you which BL character or couple perfectly matches the vibe of each song.

1 | "imperfect for you" by Ariana Grande: This one's off her new "please feel sad for me because even though I'm messy when it comes to love I still have feelings" album. I may have listened to this one "on repeat," because it's just cathartic to two-step to these lyrics: "I'm fucked up / anxious / too much / but I'll love you / like you need me to / imperfect for you." What's that? Self-awareness? Respect. I just know Ming from My Stand-In would have the audacity to sing this to body-swapped Joe.

2 | "Acid Dreams" by MAX and Felly: Could not tell you who either of these people are but this song is a snap-worthy bop that got me feeling myself every time it comes on -- probably because it opens with: "You look so good in a night gown girl / freckles on your face / lemme kiss each one." This was clearly meant for my generation, because there is not a single human under 30 in possession of a night gown. But Khem from Deep Night would 1,000% use this song to charm the pants off of someone.

3 | "Toco Toco To" by Dixson Waz: I'm Dominican. And even though I understand Spanish, I cannot for the life of me tell you what this man is saying, but I can assure you it is inappropriate. Rated NC-17 without a doubt. And for that reason, I'd pair this song with the entire cast of Playboyy -- just casually playing this in the background of one of their random, impromptu, midday sex parties.

4 | "Lie to Me" by Meghan Trainor: Obsessed. Not with her. With her music. She has so many non-butt-related songs that are worth a listen. I truly feel like she's underrated -- on par with Ed Sheeran -- and she doesn't get enough credit for it. In this track, she sings: "I don't want the truth / I want you." That sounds exactly like our lovesick boy Nick in Only Friends, thirsting after anti-monogamy Boston like he didn't know better.

5 | "Jealous" by Chris Brown, Lil Wayne, & Big Sean: While it is true that every single person on this track is problematic, including producer DJ Khaled, the swagger is immaculate. Every time it comes on, I, sincerely, close my eyes and just picture BTS's rap line to cleanse the beat. Not gonna miss out on a banger because men are the worst. Anywayyyy, the most jealous character I can think of is Way from Pit Babe, who tried to r-word his "bestie" because he chose a random nerd over him. He fits in well with these clowns.

6 | "Bounce Back" by Little Mix: The only British pop girl group I've ever intentionally streamed is Spice Girls, but the algorithm clearly thought it meant I'd like this group, and the track that hooked me was one that sampled the iconic Soul II Soul's "Back to Life." Instant replay. Someone I think lives and breathes the mantra "You can have me however you want me / however you need me" is the Sultan of Simp, Karan from Cherry Magic (Thailand). Achi could've asked for a kidney, and he would've delivered. But coming in a close second is obviously Rain from Love in the Air. Payu had to practically beat him off with a stick -- no pun intended.

7 | "Body" by Loud Luxury and Brando: It's the buildup to the chorus for me -- come to find out many listens later that it's about a guy who is begging a girl to sleep with him because he's been "waiting too long." 🙄 This one very obviously goes to Yuan from Unknown, who damn near disintegrated Qian's clothes the minute he saw even the glimmer of a green light. Talk about a slow build.

8 | "Into You" by Fabolous feat. Tamia: Back in 2003, rappers used to drop an R&B hit every now and then to remind women that they were romantics. The gaslight kings of the aughts. So in this track, this duo talks about an inexplicable-but-undeniable connection, which only makes me think of Vegas and Pete from KinnPorsche. Those two needed a PowerPoint presentation to explain to their friends and family how they went from hostage situation to star-crossed lovers. But we got nothing -- just good vibes and patricide.

9 | "i wonder..." by j-hope feat. Jung Kook: Do I miss them? Yes. Will I listen to any BTS track that's easy to Namjoon to? Yes. Now that we got that out of the way: This song is about enjoying the moment and not wasting the good times by dreading the future. And that just screams Be My Favorite to me. Kawi just kept trying to time-travel his way to a hetero fantasy, not realizing his queer happily ever after was standing right in front of him the whole time in the gorgeous form of the eternally patient Pisaeng.

10 | "MY HOUSE" by Beyoncé: Not to bring up BTS again, but 👀...j-hope would body any choreography set to this song. Without breaking a sweat. And mother would be proud. On this track, the Queen B speaks of once dreaming of the wealth, fame, and stability she has now, and making sure to only keep positive people around her, because love heals. Sailom from Dangerous Romance would certainly relate to having similar dreams and beliefs, and effortlessly exudes equally feisty bad bitch energy. I still can't get over how he disarmed his bully (and future love interest), Kanghan, by basically saying, "You clearly like me. Shut up." And saying it with tongue.

That was fun. 🤸🏿‍♂️

[broz0neglitters]

Keep me in the dollhouse

° ˛ ° ˚* Π☽˚ ˛ ✩ ˚˛˚*//__＼。✩˚ ˚˛ ♡ ˚ ˛˚˛˚｜ 田田｜門｜ ˚ ˚ ´´ ̛ ̛ ´´ ´´ ´´ ̛ ̛ ´´ ´´ ´´ ̛ ̛ ´´ ´´ ´´ ̛ ̛

-John Dory was all about being perfect. He would push all of his little brothers to be perfect on stage for the fans, but he would even push them harder when they were not performing; it soon overwhelmed the other brothers; His younger brothers felt like they're John Dory little dolls because John dory would keep dressing them up the way he wanted and tell them to act the way john dory wanted them to act But most of all John Dory wanted his four little dolls to be perfect-

----------------------------

Ever since Brozone made their Debut, the brothers felt like John Dory had got them in a chokehold with the amount of pressure put on them with practices, photo shoots, and so on. It was like John Dory had kept them all in the Dollhouse, dressed them up, and made sure they were perfect in every way possible

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"In some other lifetime, I roam free," Clay said to himself tired of being bossed around by his older brothers he wanted to be taken seriously

"Strutting down my own lane, my way, no kings, no slaves But right now." Spruce said

"He got us in a chokehold with all these stupid practices and stuff. We barely have time to do our things, and I can't even attend my sad book club," Clay said

"and I'm so hungry John Dory keeps making me eat all these orange slices. Even every restaurant I go to has orange slices on the menu named after me," Spruce said

Both clay and Spruce would always dream of one day just being free from John Dory control and just doing their own things such as Clay joining a sad book club; trolls taking him seriously and Spruce finally getting to recover from a ED And settling down with a wife and a kid and hopefully change his name leaving his boy band days behind him

Floyd also understands his two older brothers' pain he can relate to so much of it because John Dory doesn't give floyd enough credit because he was the one who made the Brozone album over while babysitting Branch and also wrote some popular Brozone hit songs (they were poppy's favorite)

"Guys; I know John dory is hard on us right now but we just gotta keep our heads held up high and plus is our only source of income." Floyd said

Floyd was right; Brozone was the only one keeping them financially stable. They were in a lot of debt before they formed Brozone, but they had to pay a massive price for their childhood and let John use them as his dolls for their income

John Dory wanted them to have the same hairstyle as Branch; He made them wear matching vests with different colors. He even took Clay and floyd to the hair salon to get their hair dye since it needed to fit the boyband theme. Clay didn't like his yellow hair; people kept calling him Banna hair and floyd. Well, he didn't mind the red hair, but still, he wanted his pink hair cause he felt like one of the girls. But John Dory didn’t want floyd to have pink hair since it is a girl's color

------------------

~Present day~

As all the brothers were sent to therapy thanks to Poppy, they couldn't look at John Dory. They all look so different from when they were in Brozone, With Clay being the tallest brother with messy green lime hair, Bruce no longer having the abs and settling down with a loving wife and 13 children, well, floyd got captured and almost die, but got save and well branch he was no longer bitty B...

"so boys is there anything you wanna say to your big brother?" Their therapist said to them

The room went silent for about 3 minutes straight as Clay cleared his throat " John Dory I don't know what you were thinking I think you sold your soul to the devil when you formed Brozone because I know for sure you wouldn't boss us around this much and set high standards for us sure it was our only way of income but because of you all of us are here in therapy." Clay said 

"Dollhouse, dressed up, perfect, messed up." Floyd said it didn't make any sense to john dory and the others but Bruce finally understood what floyd meant by that

"Floyd; right John Dory you're crazy for thinking that we were your little dolls so you could dress us up and make us act the way you want us to act it was like you're ashamed of us literally being ourselves so that why you push us to change our personality to match your perfect theme " Branch spoke for the frist time he was very quiet since after saving floyd he was still upset over what happened...

"John dory, we're not your dolls. We're your brothers. Even if we were in a band, you still shouldn't treat us like we're your dolls or your back up singers, but because of all the trauma you put on us, we have a hard time finding out who we are personally well it took years for almost all of us to be ourself again.." Bruce said

"All the trauma couldn't hold you down..." John said

"BUT IT DID JOHN DORY! BECAUSE OF YOU, I HAD AN ED BECAUSE OF YOU WE WERE FORCED TO PLAY DOLLHOUSE WITH YOU WHERE YOU DRESSED US UP AND MADE US PERFECT BECAUSE YOU WERE ASHAMED OF US BEING OUR TRUE SELVES." Bruce finally snap

"You're no victim. You guys don't know what I had to go through to get you to where you are today. Even if I did force you to dress up and act perfect, it was because we were under a record label. I personally never wanted to force you guys to do those things, but it was the company they say if I didn't do it then they will break up brozone and he will be in debt again" John said leaving the room

"well, I guess the session is over then I guess I can book you boys in for next week at 11:00 then." therapist said writing down a note

After John Dory left the room the 4 brother was speechless they didn't know to believe john dory or not it was hard because they haven't seen him in 20 year since the band broke up.....

------------------------------ I won't be opening requests due to time conflicts with my real life. I also have to tackle two jobs, and they do take time to write, but if you want to ask me any questions, feel free to private message me. I will respond to them :). Hope you all have a great day/night where ever you are <3 ---------------------

Like + Follow are very much appreciated! Also, check out my most recent works : -most underrated. Pls show it some love <3-

[oh-stars]

His Atlas

Love is taking care of the other person when they're having a bad day, they don't have to be sick just need some love.

a @steddielovemonth prompt | 830 words | CW: stroke patient, caretaking of a parental figure | Rating: T

--

This must be how Eddie felt all those years ago. Steve feels helpless as he watches Eddie run himself ragged, trying to do everything for everyone all at once – the same thing Steve was doing in their youth. Only, when Steve was playing caretaker to everyone, he was in his twenties and had way more stamina than he does now, even if he wasn’t in the best physical shape, what with his constant injuries and all. 

Now, Eddie’s dealing with chronic pain on top of burning the candle from both ends. 

Steve wants to help, and he is in every way that he can, but… they all know that Wayne’s a proud man. Since he had his stroke, he’s just not comfortable with Steve helping in the more intimate areas of care. Not like he is with Eddie. And it’s not that he and Wayne aren’t close or that Steve can’t help if Eddie isn’t around, it’s just a preference and one that Steve gets. He’s had this conversation with Dustin a few times now. He loves all the party, but he’d be way more comfortable with Dustin taking care of him than Lucas, even though he’s close with both of them. So he gets it. 

But that means it all falls on Eddie. 

He’s had to cut his hours at the shop, mostly just running the numbers and doing the boring shit he hates because his day is dedicated to helping Wayne. Eddie takes him to every appointment and physical therapist and spends hours doing things to benefit Wayne. And he does it proudly, never lets Wayne see the toll it's taking on him, because he feels like he owes him this. Which is something Steve can’t relate to. Not to the same level, at least. 

“Baby,” Steve says as Eddie changes the clothes over. “Let me take care of that.” 

Eddie waves him off. “You just got home. Go relax.”

“And you’ve been on your feet all day,” Steve says as his hands find their way to Eddie’s waist. He can tell his hip is bothering him from the way he’s standing, so Steve lets his fingers quietly dig into the sore spot, the one that always has Eddie turning to goo under him as the tension is released. 

“Wayne needs–” 

“He’s asleep,” Steve says kindly. “Let him rest. You both need to rest. Don’t think I don’t know how hard his physical therapy days are on you.” 

“It’s payback for the asshole I was when I was going to PT,” Eddie grumbles as he turns back to the clothes. 

Steve moves with him, hands still massaging. “Ed,” he says again, “let me help where I can. Please.” 

“I’m the one who was off all day–” 

“You weren’t exactly lounging on the couch with your hand in your pants–” 

Eddie looks over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow. “Is that what you do on your days off?” 

Steve smirks and leans forward to peck his lips. “Maybe. Maybe not.” 

“Naughty,” Eddie whispers against him, letting their lips press together longer, smoother. 

“I’m making your favorite tonight,” Steve says when he pulls away. “After I finish the laundry.” 

Eddie sags against him, sighing as he nods. “Fine,” he mumbles. 

“And I’ll wake Wayne in an hour to take his medicine,” Steve says as he starts to walk backward toward their bedroom. When they pass the threshold, he helps Eddie out of his clothes and snags the massaging oil that always helps on Eddie’s bad joint days. Wordlessly, Steve makes Eddie lay down and spends a few minutes rubbing the oil in, caring but still on the clinical side – he can give Eddie a more sensual massage when he’s feeling up for it later. “I’ll take care of him, baby,” Steve whispers as he kisses Eddie’s shoulder. “Just sleep for now.” 

“He won’t let you bathe him–” 

Steve shushes him. “I think Wayne understands you need a break, baby. Think of this as payback for all the times you’ve had to take care of me, huh? Let me take care of you right now. Just for the night, yeah?” 

Eddie doesn’t say anything, but the way his body relaxes deeper and deeper into the bed is telling enough. Just before he drops off, Steve barely hears him whisper, “Love you.” 

“I love you, too,” Steve whispers, leaning down to kiss his shoulder again. “Rest, baby.” 

He keeps massaging his back and hips until Eddie’s out, snoring against the pillow. Steve leaves the room, door cracked just in case for Eddie’s peace of mind, and washes his hands in the kitchen sink. Then he gets to work taking care of the laundry, prepping dinner, and getting all of Wayne’s medicine ready to go for the night. 

It’s not nearly enough, but all he can hope is this is enough to take the weight of the world off Eddie’s shoulders for a while. Even Atlas needed a break from time to time.

--

Thank you @lady-lostmind for beta reading!

Ao3 Link

[agirlwholovesrockstars]

𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖒𝖊 𝖋𝖊𝖊𝖑 𝖇𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖓𝖊𝖜

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓕𝓲𝓿𝓮

"𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴, 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦"

彡 𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 彡

✦ 𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 ✦

𝕾𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞 : in the midst of the possible destruction of your kingdom, you listen to your heart and what it wants before it's too late

𝖂𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝕮𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙 : I just hope it'll satisfy you on the right amount 🙏🏻

𝖂𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 : 18+ MDNI‼️Knight!Eddie Munson x Princess!FEM! reader, language, use of y/n, SMUT‼️, unprotected sex, p in v penetration, soft sex, aftercare, slight self-doubt, realizations, big reveal?!? 👀, mentions of brothel, forbbiden love, lost prince, d3ath, reports of missing people, reader and Eddie are both (21), Henry and Jason won't be in this part but they'll be back on the next chapter but still their names will be mentioned!, Enzo, Wayne, Dmitri, Gareth and Jeff reappearance!

𝖂𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖙𝖔 𝕰𝖝𝖕𝖊𝖈𝖙 : set in 17th century, dark fantasy, romance, upside down exists, fluff and smut but there will still be angst to this at some points but y'all don't worry because the angst is lighter on this! 🙏🏻

𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 𝕿𝖔 ��𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗 : I'm so very sorry that I took this long to write the next part because I'm making this perfectly written! I take time to think carefully of what I'm going to do on the next chapter, I'm a college student and also working and I have many personal endeavors, so, I hope y'all understand! 🥺🫶🏻

𝕬𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗 𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 : 2 more chapters left to go! OMG, I am not ready for this to be over! but I'm glad y'all like this universe that I created with my mind and so very grateful to anyone who joining in to my world! 😭❣️

"Eddie!"

"What?"

You're in the pavilion far from anyone who can see the both of you together

You're reading a fantasy book while Eddie is hugging behind you, he moved your hair on the other side to seal kisses on your neck

"It tickles!" You reason with him

He chuckles as he tightens his embrace to you as he nuzzles in aggressively on the crook of your neck causing you to laugh heartedness

You bring yourself to face him as you smile so brightly and he leans down forward to capture your lips for a kiss, you yelped but your eyes softens to his actions

You kiss him back as he holds you closer by the waist

When he pulls back "I'll never get tired of doing that to you all the time" he grins

You bite down on your bottom lips "I feel the same way"

Your smile falters a bit when you remembered that you're going to see Henry

You've been avoiding him like the plague, even after his invitation after the ballroom few days ago, no one knows that's also the same night you kissed Eddie for the first time

You only agree to his invitation when it's about priorities of your people needs or anything that it's related in your kingdom

You're sure enough that you want Eddie

If you say the words now, it feels too soon and a little fast

You just gonna have sometime to really think about it carefully

"Hey, you ok?" He asks softly, immediately holds your cheek and raises it up to make you look at his gaze

You smile sadly as you shake your head as you reached to his hand to where he holds your cheek "I just....I-I just wished we could do this all time without being scared about anyone seeing us"

"Yeah, I wanted that too"

"You do?"

"More than anything, Y/N"

The smile he always wants to see came back on your lips as you hug him and listen to his heartbeat

He tilt his head down as he rests his cheek on top of your head as he pulls you close to his chest

"Your heart beats so fast, Ed's"

He chuckles "It's because I'm with you, sweetheart" he pulled back to kiss your forehead and he tap your nose with his finger, his other arm remained around you

You giggle "Me too"

You both stayed like that for a moment as both of your minds at the same time thinking about everything

Eddie didn't care if you don't have each other in the end, he'll never leave you all alone, he knows you have so many things to dealt with

You already got a lot going on your plate, he doesn't want to be a burden, so, he set his thoughts and feelings aside

He is so willingly to wait for you

He doesn't care how long it takes, he'll wait for you

You wanted to speak about the important information about him so badly

It's like every piece of you is deteriorating every time you're not telling him anything

You feel guilty for keeping it

You don't know why there is something is telling you "not now" when you're about to tell him

You gotta find a way to make up for everything

You can't leave him hanging like this, you just can't do that to him, you'll never forgive yourself if you hurt him because of you

"Later?" You pulled back and so does he as he looks at you, he kissed your cheek

Before he could stand back, you hold his jaw as you plant a soft but yet promising kiss to his lips, it surprises him

"You know where to find me"

You nod as you held his hand as you both laced them together but slowly letting go as you walk away slowly

He smiles as you walk backwards with your book that you ignored close to your chest

The moment you're out of his sight of frame, he sighs sadly

God, he's so attached to you, he couldn't even understand how but his heart really tells speaks for you

He must find a way to get things done

So, that no more unsure thoughts and unspoken words that it will lead him to assume everything

Nothing will ever come out good when you're with Jason, you start marching out of the room and headed to your chambers

Henry, specifically asked you to see him

Not him

It's maddening, really, you have no clue about the missing cases that happening lately

What are they keeping from you?

You seriously need to know all about it before they could make you feel stupid again

You know they did it on purpose to make you feel like that but this time

You won't let them

From your deep thoughts something else caught your eye

A short cream paper is laying beside your hairbrush, you squint at it

You look around as you unfold the piece of paper

"Two childhood royalties are stitched together since the minute they're both born, but different paths crossed as they lost the thread with one another, will they find themselves before the time ends?"

The familiar handwrite, is it Wayne? You gasped

You tried to let him out but he wouldn't let you because it's too late for you to do it at that time

It feels like he already knows about Eddie, Enzo might've been mentioned about him

Eddie did mention to you that Enzo came to him as they look for you

Wayne always does this when you we're both kids, playing which one who'll find him first

He always give notes that there's no way or even indication that says that'll lead you both to him

You....just....both...know it

Your eyes welled up in tears when you finally getting the reunion that you always wanted

It's time for him to know it

"I don't even know what we're doing but I'm game for it" Enzo says as he folds the cream paper into by 4 as he cuts it using a paper knife

"She already read the first one"

"How do you know?"

"I can feel it....in my belly" he used the quill to point at his stomach

Enzo snorts as he shooks his head "I believe in you, man, glad to have you back"

Wayne looks hesitant to ask but he goes with it "What does he look like?"

"Who- oh- Eddie"

He nods as his eyes twinkle to Enzo's words

"He grew up like a great man he is, I don't even recognize him- he is an amazing kid, Wayne"

"Does he mentioned something about me?"

"That's the thing"

"What thing?!?"

"He doesn't even remember about anyone or himself"

"Even Y/N?"

"I don't know the answer to that, but, Gareth and Jeff told me that they met Y/N when she escaped from Jason's guards, they even mentioned that they're going to kill her and marriage-"

"Arrangement"

"Yes"

"So, he doesn't remember anything at all? he's only a teenager when they took him from me"

Enzo shrugs as he collects all of the cream paper and placed it on the table where Wayne is sitting

"I'm afraid, so, but the boys told me that Eddie always tries to remember his lost memory, the only thing that he can recall like really vividly? It's a young girl and he believes that he has a family member"

"Oh god" he crumples the scratch paper in anger

"I'm sure he's with Y/N, he is in good hands" Enzo reassures him as he gives an sympathetic smile

"I hope so, man, god- I hope so" Wayne laced his hands together in front of him as he leans down, shutting his eyes, as he prays for his boy

The most unforgivable that Wayne couldn't face is that he lost his dear nephew

Because of him, they taken him away from him, he hates himself because of his lousy parenting

He blames himself, he swore that he is just there and after a couple of seconds, he disappeared out of the blue

He knows that he is not perfect and he tries his best to be the parent that Eddie deserves to have

The screams and the cry for help from his nephew voice, it destroyed him, he searched far and wide to look for him

Until he has no choice but to look him for you, he grew hopeless when he couldn't do anything to help you that night

He lost his boy

He lost his dear girl, who he treats like his own daughter

It annoyed him when he couldn't figure out who is the cause of everything, who took Eddie?, why suddenly he couldn't remember who he was?!

Who is the culprit?

Who is the source of this madness?

This place was once a spectacle kingdom until it looses it's own life

When Jim goes missing, it's like a domino, everything falls one by one

He's got to have this reunion even just a glimpse or a minute to make himself full once again

To make him believe that there's still life that's left

It just needs a spark to make it alive

That's hope

"You got so drunk that you fell of the chair!"

"No- I did not!"

"Uh, yes, you do!"

Jeff continues to tease Gareth with each other as their mindless friend zoned out as he leans backward on the sofa close at the window

"I'm not dealing with your, bullshit, Jeff!" Gareth picks up his cloak as he exits the room while chuckling Jeff is left behind and about to follow him until he notices his friend

"Eddie?"

"Uh, yeah?" He straightens himself up to look at Jeff

"You good?"

"I'm-"

"Don't lie to me"

Eddie huffs but a smile tugs to his lips

"Just say what you feel about her, man"

"I-I don't know- she's-"

"What? A princess? That's what's stopping you? Do you think she cares for what she is?!?"

He sighs as he leans forward with his hands together "No, she's not, it's just that.... isn't it too selfish to get what I want when all of this chaos is happening at her life now?"

Jeff nods "What if, you'll make it better and easier for her when you say what you truly feel? Like right now, do it!"

He runs his palms through his face as his friend's words are making a point

It is indeed making a huge point

"And also, don't you ever thought about that maybe-"

"She's the mystery girl?"

"Yeah!"

"Get out of here!" He attempts to kick him but Jeff moves aside as he laughs

"Ah- I told you don't lie to me, I always remember that trait from you, if you feel your guts right, it's always right"

"Yeah"

"Y/N, trust you, Eddie, I mean- that girl has balls but when she trust someone like really every inch of you that she's counting on you? She's the real deal, man"

Eddie nods as he smiles gratefully to his friend as he watches him grab his cloak as well

"We're going out for a drink and also dinner"

"Delightful"

Jeff chuckles to his reply "You know, you're always welcome to join us"

"I think I'll rather stay for tonight"

"Sure, take care" Jeff gave him an encouraging smile as he closes the door behind him

Eddie chortled at Gareth's complaints about why Jeff is taking so long

He tossed and turn at the bed as he sits up and watches and listens at the cackles of burning sounds at the fireplace

He flopped back down at the bed as he groans about his mind, body, heart, is occupied of you

He read some books earlier before to clear his mind but nothing seems to turn it off

He removes himself off the blanket, he is now sitting on the edge of the bed

He wonders, if you think about him right now, you told him that you're going to see him later

It's always late at night where you could get together since everyone is asleep and you can sneak in to see each other

But, what if once this all over

What he'll do after?!?

He can't go home without you

Not only he wants you, he needs you

What he would be without you?

Can he survive?

Will you feel safe and sound without his arms around you?

He clicks his tongue as he goes back at the bed laying down on it again like it was minutes ago

You can't fall asleep too

You want to see him again, you told him truthfully that you will see him again

But, Henry forbid you to go out at night since they can't find the people who escaped from the upside down

He told it was dangerous for you to even go outside of your room when you're literally inside of your palace

If someone goes to your mind right now, they'll flee immediately at how your mind runs in the hills of how many you've been thinking throughout the day

Your whole body system is longing for him

You breathe deeply as your heart won't stop screaming for him

You've been twiddling with your thumbs, if you should see him at this hour

You're debating, if he's fast asleep or not

You also wonder if he thinks about you like this

God, you hate this, your face grimaced at it

You had fucking enough of it

You deserve to feel this, it's rare to feel something like this in your life

You remove yourself off the blanket, you reached for your robe and went at your vanity, you grab your hairbrush and spritz perfume on your pulse points

You checked yourself once in the mirror

You smile to yourself, you're not second guessing yourself anymore

As you quietly open your bedroom door

It's a chilly evening, walking towards your secret sanctuary room with barefeet

You take a one last breath as you turn the doorknob as you walked inside

Eddie heard the door clicked open as he sits up fast as he awaits someone at the door, he gasped when his eyes laid on you

He couldn't believe it that you're here

You've done both nights together

But this is far beyond different than those nights that happened

As you closed the door and locked it, you both didn't speak as you remained your eyes at him as you walk closer to him

His breath hitches when you started untying the knot from your robe as you let it fall on the carpeted floor

Your white nightgown is see-through and the neckline is deliciously falling onto the sides as you reached for it to place it back on to your shoulder

He can see the contours of your breasts and your waist

He watches you as you climb on top of him, he swallows nervously as you position yourself

Your nightgown feels so soft and so heavenly fitting to you as his eyes grows heavy at the sight of you

The moment you start reaching at the hem of your nightgown, he fumbles at the blanket and his bottom slacks

You stand up as you slowly sink down at him, he couldn't help but to hold your bare hips while you still holding your ruffled nightgown

He's so big and thick that you whimpered as he groans at how you take him

You hiss at it and the pain and the intrusion that you're feeling as your sopping cunt eating him inch by inch

As you finally sanked down at him all in, you both moaned

You finally let go of the riled up nightgown as you bit your lip at the pleasurable adjustment

You start bouncing on his cock at a slow pace, he grunts as he pulls you close, you gasped when he gives a heated kiss

He taps on your legs signaling you as he moved forward giving you space making you whine as you felt him inside of you as you wrap your legs around him, your throw head back at the sensation

Your eyes are squeezed shut as you ride him, your nightgown fell of your shoulder as Eddie hands goes under your nightgown as it goes all over your body

Touching your waist, kneading at your breasts as he smears love kisses at your collarbones and neck

He holds you close as he bucks his hips as your pace starts to go faster and faster

You moan at his ear as you grind against him

He gasps in shock when he shoots his seeds inside of you, he panicked, you shut him off with a kiss

A lazily smile is sitting on your lips when you also cum with him as well at the same time

He sighs of relief as he continues to fill you up with his load, you hummed in satisfaction

His eyes grew hungrier and he's more confident to hold you tighter by the waist as he pins you down on the bed

You got startled as you giggle as he smiles down at you admiring your pretty face as he runs the sides of his fingertips on your cheek

You placed your fingertips on your lips as he notices it

You licked your lips together as you smile naughtily, he grins as he dives down to kiss you like you both wanted

The way you can feel his lips moving onto yours is such a blissful feeling, it's like the perfect mold together, your lips we're made for each other

He got you distracted by the sweet kiss as you can feel him sheathing his cock inside of you

The kiss is cut off as you begin to withering beneath him, he smirks as he kisses your jawline

He reaches the end of your nightgown as he looks at you for permission, you nod, as he takes it all off leaving you naked on display for him only him

Your long locks of hair are completely disheveled as you both start to pant and building up sweat on both bodies

You remove his blouse as he helps you to take it all off

Even you're absolutely enjoying of how he takes care of you while loving you like this

You smile sheepishly as you both naked together for the first time, he is so god-like with his biceps appearing as he held you to love you like this

He holds your hips as he pounds at you mercilessly, your face contorts in pleasure as you gripping the sheets

Oh, he is so cloud nine at how your cunt swallows him whole at how wet you are that he can easily slide in and out of you

The arousal and your juices are squelching as your bodies making slapping sounds

Your mouth is covered behind your hand as you move your head aside

You're an fucking angel beneath him, not even an angel, a goddamn princess

You thought only his undeniable good looks and charm can make you turn on but when you saw his tattoos completely uncovered for the first time makes your head spin even more

He takes off the hand from your mouth as you couldn't close your mouth hanging open without any sounds that's coming out of it

He intertwines both of your hands as he rolls his hips as he goes deeper and deeper inside of you

Making you realize the spots that he's reaching won't let you stop from moaning

It became a higher pitch when he laced your fingers tighter as he slip on and off at you at a brutal pace

Gosh, he is relentless and ruthless, the way he moves at your velvety walls is making your head spun as you start to clench around him

Your breasts are jiggling as he kisses you sloppily yet so lustfully as he grabs your breasts as you throw your arms around him making him rest at the crook of your neck

He thrust once more as you screamed harder, you're both breathing heavily when he gave you another best orgasm of your life

Your body jerked up as he pulls back to look at you, he smiles as he leans down to kiss you again

You both looked at each other while having a silly fit of giggles

He carefully pulls out of you as you winced, he covers your body with a blanket, he takes a sanitized cloth as he cleans you up

The midnight is so peaceful and quiet as you looked outside at the window, even just for a moment, you feel contented at this

You blushed at his actions as he purses his lips together in concentration making sure you're clean enough

It's making you emotional too, he really does care for your well-being

He lets you borrow his blouse for the night as he stays in with his slacks as he lays beside you

You rest under his shoulder as you lay your arm on top of his stomach on the side

One of you has to say something, but someone needs to make the first move

"Are you-" you're both in synch as you crack up a laugh

"I'm okay, if that's what you're asking, Ed's" you say with a lingering smile on your face

He nods "It's so unbelievable that you're here right now, Y/N"

"My first and my great experience of an orgasm, really"

"What?"

"Yeah"

"How did you do that, Ed's? I just feel so good"

He became a flustering mess as his cheeks turned red "You're a-also my first, Y/N"

"You're bluffing!" You poke his sides as he chuckles

"No- I am not!" he defends himself

"Well, it's such a long time ago before I even met the guys, I was travelling and I stopped by for a meal and I picked up and learned some info at a brothels before but I didn't do anything at that time"

His words are so honest without anything making you feel mad

"Oh"

"Since it's your first, wait- did you get hurt?!"

"Yes, it hurt but not so much at all"

He kisses the top of your head as he runs his hands at your arms up and down

It went silent for a bit as you ask him again

"Eddie?"

"Hm?"

"Why didn't you get a girl in there?"

He looks back at you "I wasn't looking for it and never did think of it, I don't know why but it doesn't feel right to me like there's always someone that is made just for me, so, I waited"

Oh, don't you just love him even more?!?

"Not even an admiration to someone else before me?"

He chuckles "Y/N, I don't have time for those since I lived at the upside down, did you think that I have time for those kind of stuff?!?"

"No" you whisper

"Besides, even when there's no upside down I'll still wait for the right girl for me"

You don't even notice your tears are now falling from your eyes as he felt it on his chest, you became overwhelmed at his underappreciated wonderfulness

He sits up as you reach at the blanket

"W-What- I'm"

"Don't be sorry, Ed's" you sniffle as you smile with tears on your eyes

"I'm just so unexplainably happy right now" you laugh as you continue to sob

He smiles as he wipes your tears using his thumb as he kiss on your lips and cheeks

Before he can even stop himself, the words fall out from his lips

"Y/N, I can't search for the right words to tell you how I feel"

You gulped as your eyes starts to well up again

"God, it's you, Y/N, you make me feel whole and as I am, I love you"

You're stunned completely, your eyes went through all over his face, his chocolate brown eyes speaks the same thing

Your tears streaming down at your face

"I have loved you from the moment I saved you"

You have no other choice but to kiss him again, he cups your jaw as he kisses you back

You both fall back down as you stare with one another

"I don't wanna fall asleep"

"Why?"

"This might be a dream"

"You think I'll vanish?"

"Yes"

"I won't, Y/N, I would never"

"You won't?"

"I will never make you feel hurt by anything"

He reassures you as he pulls you by his side as his scalp soft massages circling motions helps you fall asleep as you drift away

Eddie smiles to himself and to you as you sleep peacefully, he can feel his eyes tiring as he goes to sleep

He stirs up at airy morning as he starts to search with his hand and when he felt the cold empty bed, he opens his eyes wide as he worries and sits up on the bed

"Woah, woah, calm down- before you can hurt yourself, Eddie!" You reappeared before he can look on the other side

He let out a heavy sigh as he embraces you, you lean down to kiss his shoulder "I'm here" you whisper softly

He notices you're still wearing his blouse with your robe on top of it, he smiles

You pulled back as you kiss him on the cheek, he smiles as you showed him your breakfast tray

"I sneak outside before the sun shines to get it" you shyly said as you flick your hair

He tucks your hair behind your ear as he holds you by the tip of your chin to kiss you on the lips "What a perfect morning" you giggled

"I was there by the window, I didn't want to wake you and I also don't wanna eat alone, so, I waited for you" you shrug as you scrunch your face with a dazzling smile

He caresses your cheek with his thumb as he looks deep into your eyes, your gaze softens

You both eat together on the small table near at the window as you share the same teacup, it's bacon, scrambled eggs, toast and bowl of strawberries and blueberries with cream on the side

You never eaten any food with such happiness, he feels the exact same way

It's the same giddy feeling that you felt when you had your first meal with him

When that's done, you don't wanna leave just yet, so, you both get cuddle up by the fireplace on the sofa

As you lay on top of him while wraps his arms around behind you

"Are you gonna keep my blouse so I'll stay naked?" His tone sparks mischief

"Maybe" you tease him

He tickles your sides as you protest "Stop!"

"You're so pretty, my pretty princess" he whispers to your ear as he makes loud kiss noises on your shoulder and your cheek

Your eyes flashes with sadness not because you're with him, it's because he still didn't know after all this time, not even realizing it

You peel yourself off of him as his smile never left on his lips

You blink too many times for not turning up the waters on your eyes as you smile at him

You graze your fingers on his long bangs as your eyes halted at the familiar scar on his forehead

You pursed your lips together as you flush down on him, he chuckles slightly

You bring yourself to face him again

"Eddie, I wanna tell something about you"

His demeanor became focused on you, his eyes are so comforting and safe as he sits up properly and holds both of your hands

Your eyes flit back on his scar and back to him

"There's this young boy that I grew up with, he is so kind, thoughtful, courageous, wise beyond his age, my nemesis at swords fight" you chuckle lightly at that as he listens carefully

"Most importantly, he's the only boy that has a heart like no other, so selfless and a gentleman, we didn't talk much because he's building himself to become a well respected lord on his place" you paused as his forehead creased at your story

"But everytime he came to visit, even just for a while, I didn't forget those moments of how beautiful his characteristics are and he treats me like the way that princess needs to be treated, it's also the very first time that I ever felt like a princess" your eyes shines with so much loveliness

You scoot closer to him, you didn't miss the way his eyes are suddenly are covered by a cloud as his mood changed

"I didn't courted anyone, even my suitors, I am displeased with all of them because I have found my prince"

His eyes snapped back at you as his eyes pleads for you

"It's you, Eddie, you're my prince, you're that boy that I grew up with" your voice cracks as you couldn't stop holding back your tears anymore

As his eyes are rimmed with tears as he lets them fall in front of you, he is appalled, his eyes searches on your face to find more answers and the fact you chose him

He felt his heart jumped out of his body

He laughs in belief slightly "So, it was you all along?! I was right?!"

"You knew?!"

"My vision is not so clear but I was certain that it's a young girl and I know that I still have a-"

"Uncle"

"What?"

"Uncle Wayne, he's friends with my father, trusted advisor"

"I have an uncle?!" he saids so happily as he falters again quite a bit

"Where is he?"

"Eddie, I tried to help and get him out but I was running out of time, I was in the dungeon"

He squeezes your hands as he realized something again the other day "I-I saw him"

"You did?"

"Briefly, no wonder why my heart tugs for him, it's immediate connection that I felt once I saw him that's when I was out looking for you but I hid since you're with Henry at that time"

"Oh"

"I'm a prince?!"

"Yes, you are, Eddie, I know Wayne couldn't forgive himself for what happened, god, someone took you from him, Eddie, I was so heartbroken"

"You are?"

"Of course, you're the only one that I ever loved since the beginning, I didn't realized it at that time but when we reunited again and my memories flooded back to me after the accident, the feelings never faded it's still there"

"The scar?" He lets go one of his hand on you, as he reaches it to touch it

You chuckled at the memory "We we're 14 at that time, you're going to give me this unique but delicate flower but it's hanging from a tree, which is so high, you climb it nicely, the thing is that you succeed taking it but you tripped and fell over and hurt yourself on the branch and hit your forehead first, you we're bleeding and-"

"you scolded me for being careless but still you aided me after the incident" he laughs as your eyes go big

You gasp in shock "Yeah, that's what happened!" You giggled

"Wayne is mad at you that he forbids you to talk to me for a whole day!"

"With a freaking bandage on my forehead" he pauses and even him surprised that he can say what happens next with him trying to guess

"And whenever I walked down the halls, my eyes are always glue to you" he adds and you nodded at him aggressively

"The only interaction that I can give was just a small wave" you tried to reenacted at the old memory as you both burst into laughter

When your both of your laughter's died down "It's the odd sense of comfort, Ed's, it feels so natural whenever I'm with you"

He exhales as he tilts his head at the side as he kisses you lovingly, you cup his cheeks as you both kiss each other, you mewl and his hands goes under your robe and his blouse

Knowing that you're naked underneath

He holds your waist as you start moaning into his mouth as he smirks when his fingers runs through your dripping cunt, you gasp at the action, he pushes his index finger inside as you look down and position yourself, he grunts at his fingers that you're clenching on him

He pushes another finger inside, you support yourself by placing your hands on his shoulders, he slides in and out and his finger reaches that soft spongey spot that making your head fall back as he fingerfucks you

He removes the knot from your robe, as he dives into your chest, you moan and tug at his hair

He curls his fingers up once more and he starts scissoring you, you start grinding against his finger as you pull him closer to you

You slapped your mouth in a cry of pleasure as you release and squirted on his fingers, you breathe heavily as you flash him a lopsided smile

Pride swells on his chest, proud that he's the only one and first to see you fall apart for him, he's so lucky he got to hear those noises and unholiest sounds that you make

As your legs tremble as you calm down from your high, your eyes widen when he licked his fingers cleaned off that once inside of you, he hums at your sweetness

"Lovely dessert" he makes his classic antics

You chortled as you push him playfully by the chest "Eddie!"

You look at the window, you notice is getting noon already, you really don't want to leave

"I should depart now"

He frowns but you needed to go back before they found out that you're missing again

You stood up as you reached out to grab your discarded nightgown but you're undressing behind him

"Can I watch?"

You craned your neck to look at him, you smile "Yes"

You turn around at him, standing in front of him as you move closer as you start removing your robe first and took off his blouse and gave it to him

You appear naked again for him at the third time

Wow, you're literally out of this world

The way his eyes rakes all over your body, it's not disrespectful, but he's taking you in and drinking you in admiringly with a sign of contentment on his eyes

He grumbles making you jumped at his action as he pounce at you after you're done putting on your nightgown making you both fell down on the bed

You laugh as he kisses you all over again

He helped you sit up on the edge of the bed as he picked up your robe on the carpeted floor, he helps you to get on it as you muttered a small thank you as he dresses himself as well

"Eddie"

"Yeah?"

"Be careful"

Small words yet holds a deeper meaning judging by your tone

Eddie looks at you waiting for you to elaborate as you let out a defeated sigh

"It's Henry-"

"Did he hurt you?!"

"No, no, but- I think he might be"

Before Eddie can angrily reply, you dismissively wave your hand at him

"Eddie, he's-" you shut your eyes for a second as you couldn't recognize your small voice

"I don't think he's a human"

He furrows his brows as his eyes looked directly at you "What do you mean?"

He felt that you flinched slightly as you try to remember the memory, he holds you close

"I-I'm sorry, I- he- he almost killed Jason some nights ago, knocking him unconscious he has this force just by using his hands, it's so powerful" you start shaking and Eddie notices it as he held you it calmed you down

"I don't want to lose you again, Eddie" you hug him again as he smiles down at you

"You believe me? don't you?"

"Yes, I do, Y/N, with upside down existing and those monsters? I mean- anything that is unlikely to be real can be real at this rate"

You nodded at his words, he's right, anything is possible since upside down happened

"I fear they might be hiding something else from me"

Eddie nose flares in anger as he remained his arms around you

"I think so too"

Your eyebrows quirk in interest as you await for him to reply

"Remember when they inspected the house in the upside down? Jason, he always throws this words to me that I can tell that he has a secret"

"A deep dark secret"

He nods "Don't you think they're the main reason?"

"Of what?"

"Why everyone suddenly disappeared with no explanation?"

"They might be, but we're not sure of it too, since we don't have evidence"

You scoff "They're number one suspect on my list"

Before he can reply, Jeff and Gareth are banging at the door, you jumped at the sound as you quickly swing the door open as you unlock it

"Hey, Eddie-"

Jeff darts his eyes to you and to Eddie

"Oh" Jeff looks at you from up and down as he enters inside

He saw the messed up bed

You covered up your face in embarrassment as you giggled

"Oh" his eyes are glint with a knowing look as Eddie rolled his eyes at him

Meanwhile, Gareth's mood is a total wreck as he keeps on waiting to get in

But he saw you and Eddie as he went in, he uses his foot to close the door behind him

Somehow, the presence of you, his attitude changed

"Good day, Y/N"

"You too, Gareth" you're surprised to his genuine greet to you

Jeff tears his eyes away from you and Gareth as he gave Eddie the same cream paper

"Someone slip this note under our pint last night"

"Beware, beware, there's a traitor on the loose, the two young lovers can they make their way to peace, justice and harmony once again? Could they be with their friends and family like it was before? Hope and Faith is the only way to survive, be strong, young ones"

Eddie reads it carefully as he thinks, why does suddenly felt that this note is written by his Uncle?

You noticed the cream paper as you reached for it, Eddie gave it you

The moment you finished reading it your face is horrified

"Dmitri" you say plainly but you're also confused

Why is Wayne giving you a warning to a person that your father trusted so much?

"What?" Gareth comes closer to where you all circled around together

"I also received a note like this too, just recently, I think Wayne is giving hints to where to find them him and Enzo"

"From what I know is that Enzo, Wayne and Dmitri are the only ones that are very close to my father, I just don't get it why all of the people? Why Dmitri? It's seems too impossible since I can't even imagine how Dmitri will betray us"

"Maybe he snitched on you, Y/N, or they find out something about him" Jeff spoke as he turns to look at Eddie who light up at the recovering memory

"Listen up" Eddie clasps his hands together as he smiles cheesily

You, Jeff and Gareth looked at him in anticipation

"I think I know where to find them"