#and they're bickering about how best to murder the child

[guess-that-ship]

S9 Round 1

the sun and the moon

They've been together for nine thousand years, they've been ~together~ for two hundred years, and they only went on their first real date a few days ago~

Sun is an all-powerful ruler, who was once radiant and beloved. Moon is his closest, most trusted servant, who is bound to Sun with a magical contract and has been by his side for thousands of years. No worries, though, Moon is very happy with this contract and even asked for it back when it broke. You see, Moon is OBSESSED and fanatically in love with Sun from beginning to end.

Even when Sun became a cold and heartless villain, sacrificing countless lives to achieve his goals, Moon remained hopelessly devoted to him, though for a time, his method of showing his love became twisted and cruel. Later after the truth came out, Moon regretted these actions and stopped his cruelty, and also somehow became EVEN MORE OBSESSED and dramatic about it. His life is entirely devoted to Sun, and if Sun ever stops existing or no longer wants him, Moon no longer has a reason to exist either~

And through it all, despite Sun insisting that he has no emotions and doesn't know how to love, he puts up with all of it. Even though it should be impossible for Moon to overpower Sun and have his way with him, Sun lets him do what he wants and indulges in his whims. He's quick to comfort Moon or assuage his worries when he's upset, and he's extremely possessive of Moon and misses him dearly when they're separated. Moon is a wildly overdramatic and fanatically obsessed guy, but he's SUN's wildly dramatic and fanatically obsessed guy, thank you very much.

P.S. they also raised Sun's child together~ (and somehow, that kid even turned out pretty okay)

color scheme switchers

cw: murder, abuse mention

A and B meet when A kills B's abusive husband and they bury the body together. B decides this makes them friends. A few months into this friendship A plans to kill B to gain more power, but ultimately can't do it.

B becomes A's moral compass and pulls them through a sort-of redemption arc, while A becomes B's beacon, helping her through her trauma. (Eventually they flip flop being both of these for each other.) Along they way they gain another friend, C, and they're all closely knit, sometimes living together, sometimes adventuring together, but this all ends when A becomes possessed by their powers, accidentally killing C.

B is able to bring A back, but this moment is a breaking point for both of them, in opposite directions. Over the next ~900 years, A spirals into a depression, unable to move on from their past, while B keeps chugging along enjoying the present. Despite this, they are still each others best friends and safe(/bickering) places.

[comshipbracket]

Antis DNI

Remember, you are voting for the ship you prefer, not the ship you find more problematic

Propaganda for both ships under the cut.

SatouShio Propaganda (Underage, Age Gap - Satou is 15 and Shio is 8, Unhealthy dynamic - Satou keeps Shio locked inside constantly)

"Those that know Happy Sugar Life might be looking at this ship with the question of "How does a fifteen year old yandere kidnapping and isolating an eight year old child make it a good ship?" - To begin with, there's the fact that Satou's love is based on love alone, rather than lust. Before meeting Shio, she'd go through hundreds of boys using lust (not as an emotion, but tactic) to try and figure out if any could spark love, but none did. Due to her past with her aunt, she wasn't able to spark any emotion, all of it was falsified. Upon meeting Shio, and Shio explaining what she felt love was, Satou felt her first true emotions in a long time.

On top of that, out of every character in Happy Sugar Life, as bad as Satou can be, she is the best person for Shio to be with - and there is no arguing otherwise. If she heads back to her father, she'll be beaten and abused. If she goes with her brother Asahi and her mother, she'd be starving and impoverished - on top of that, Shio's mother outright openly stated she was abandoning Shio when Satou first met her, and Taiyou almost outright states he desires Shio physically, unlike Satou's emotional-focused desires. If we look at the scenes Shio goes outside, the streets are as dangerous for her as Satou's claiming during Shio's isolation. Satou taking Shio back to the apartment they stay in was the best case scenario for Shio.

In episode 5, Shio even states that she loves Satou - more than anyone in her family - and that Satou is warmer than her family. It's hard to make an argument that Shio should be with anyone but Satou, despite the nature of the anime. Shio wants to be there, and is better off there than she would be with anyone else. Satou may be a murderer, but in all cases of murder it's either to protect Shio's safety outright, or to protect their relationship together - Satou loves Shio romantically, and Shio loves Satou back. While some may argue Satou's love is familial, they kiss on the lips in episode 2, recite wedding vows every night, and have another more intimate chaste kiss in episode 11 during a pseudo-wedding where they exchange rings."

"Satou also doesn't see this reason for murder as a bad thing, nor the murder as a bad thing - it's justified to her because she's protecting Shio and their love. The first thing she ever apologises to Shio for is kissing another girl and telling someone else she loves them - it was a lie to the other girl, but Satou still breaks down apologising to Shio for betraying their love this way. The only thing that matters to her is that she treats Shio with true love. Being with Satou brings Shio happiness and joy, and being with Shio is the only thing bringing Satou any form of emotion. Shio is her light and her reason for continuing on, she'd give up without her. The two are doomed from the start, with Satou dying and Shio keeping both wedding rings and Satou's ribbon, claiming Satou is in her heart and they're together forever now, but I am near certain if Shio didn't ask Satou to die together, they would've been able to find a way to retain a happy love life after leaving the town."

Bwen Propaganda (Incest - Cousins, Species Difference - Gwen is part Anodite)

"During the original series, Ben and Gwen were almost always bickering, arguing, name-calling (calling each other "Doofus" or "Dweebs"), making fun of each other, or fighting. They had a love/hate relationship. However, deep down they really do care about each other as shown on various occasions throughout the show. Especially in Secret of The Omnitrix, when Ben would go far lengths to keep Gwen out of danger. Such as transforming into Four Arms, despite the fact that the Omnitrix's self-destruct mode countdown would only accelerate. When he found out that she was still alive, he ran through the open field of heavy fire in order to hug her.

In the Omniverse continuation, even though Gwen went to college early in the show, both have openly stated that they miss each other a lot (hugging one another before she left in The More Things Change: Part 1). Gwen ALSO runs to hug Ben when he returns to Earth in The Frogs of War: Part 2. While I'm also very much an original continuation type of girl, their bickering relationship is toned down immensely in the 2016 reboot with more heartfelt and considerate moments between Ben and Gwen looking out for each other."

[found-family-tournament]

Found Family Tournament Round 1 Part 12 Group 56

Propaganda and further pictures under the cut

Date-Sagan Family: Kaname Date, Mizuki Date, Hitomi Sagan, Iris Sagan, Aiba

God Kids: Apollo & Meg McCaffery

Mods note: I couldn't find a picture of all of them together. See below the cut for others. And if you have one of all of them, please give it to me.

Submissions are still open!

Date-Sagan Family:

(Date Family)

Date literally takes in a whole child when he can barely remember how to take care of himself all because she needs him!! Because he’s the only adult who can and is willing to take care of Mizuki even if she’s his friend’s kid, he gives her a comfortable and stable home where she can be the bratty kid she really is instead of trying to be quiet and out of the way! Then there’s Date’s sentient AI eyeball prosthetic Aiba, they bicker but deeply care about each other and he doesn’t know how to function without her and by the end of Mizuki’s route in the game they canonically ARE all a found family together and I love them lmao.

They have the best father-daughter/older brother-younger sister/two random assholes stuck together dynamic you could possibly ask for. Mizuki's bio parents sucked so when she was 8 Date was like hey, come live with me, we'll be roommates for like a month while your parents get their shit together. And then they were roommates for FOUR YEARS. Mizuki bullies Date constantly and Date makes dumb jokes that she hates and they're both stupid tsunderes that can't admit they really care for each other until it's the end of the line and a bunch of people are dead (it's a murder mystery game and a LONG story). At the beginning of the game Date uses his expensive secret agent machine to go inside Mizuki's brain and solve puzzles in her dreams to help her recover from trauma, and then at the END of the yellow route (the best ending IMO) Mizuki does the same thing for Date and there's a moment where she can run to her parents and leave Date alone..... but she runs to Date instead... and it makes me fucking WEEP!!! they care so so much about each other and it makes me fuckign feral I want to eat my computer they are so goddamn family

(Date-Sagan Family)

sometimes a family is you, your left eye, your wife, and the two weird girls you adopted

God Kids:

Sorry, I got no propaganda for them yet :(

[daisyishedwig]

Okay, okay, you twisted my arm 😉😉 I'll tell you about the plot bunny my Kurtbastian feelings have given me.

Tagging @annepi-blog and @kurtsascot since they're encouraging the plot bunny to take root.

Okay, so this might be a Kurtbastian-centric Sebklaine fic, or it might just be a Kurtbastian fic where they’re friends with Blaine, the boys will inform me which it is as I write. Either way, Blaine will exist and will be the catalyst for our favorite idiots realizing they love each other.

This is loosely inspired by What a Feeling by Klaineitupanotch, so the basics are: Kurtbastian fwb, they meet Blaine, they both want to fuck Blaine, they have a pseudo competition over who can woo Blaine, and in the end, they realize how important they are to each other. 

So, Rachel and Kurt have been living together since moving to New York but things are really not working out and Kurt is on the verge of murdering her, or at the very least completely destroying their friendship. As he is bitching about this to Sam and his friend Nick (it’s canon that Sam attended an all-boys school prior to going to McKinley so in this universe, that all-boys school was Dalton) and Nick has an idea. A possibly terrible idea, but an idea nonetheless. 

Nick’s friend Sebastian (who Sam knows but isn’t particularly close with since Sebastian transferred to Dalton after he had left) has a spare room in his apartment. He’s not exactly looking for someone to rent it out, since he owns the apartment outright thanks to his parents, but Nick knows he gets lonely in that place all alone. 

Sam thinks it’s a terrible idea because he is certain that Kurt and Sebastian will kill each other, but Nick thinks it’d be really good for Sebastian to not be able to cut himself off from everyone when he’s in a mood. 

Kurt moves in and it goes… about as well as you’d expect. Sebastian hits on Kurt, Kurt rebukes him, they fight, rinse, repeat, etc. But after a month or so they fall into a rhythm together and things settle. Sebastian, for all his selfishness, did attend boarding school all his life and is used to sharing space, unlike Rachel who was the epitome of a spoiled only child. 

And as time goes on, they even become friends and their morning bickering is almost a ritual, and on the days when one of them has to leave before the other gets up, it throws them off kilter a little. 

And with friendship comes Sebastian attempting to play wingman, there’s only one problem. Kurt’s a virgin and wants his first time to at least be with someone he trusts, even if he’s given up on the fantasy of being in love and having his first be his last. And the guys Sebastian tries to set him up with at bars and parties, do not fit the bill for either of those scenarios. 

One night, after a particularly rough clubbing experience that leaves even Sebastian without a hookup, they end up back at their apartment bitching about the assholes they’d danced with and drinking some more. 

And then Kurt says, “If you weren’t such an asshole, I’d trust you enough with my first time if only to get it over with.”

And Sebastian freezes. “What did you just say?”

Kurt rolls his eyes. “If I wasn’t positive you’d laud the fact that you took my virginity over me for the rest of our lives, I think I’d feel safe enough with you to do it.”

“I wouldn’t laud that over you,” Sebastian says softly. He knows how important feeling safe during that experience is to Kurt and if he entrusted it to him, he’d do the best he could to make sure he got that. 

And in a world where they’re not idiots they’d like, discuss this, and make a plan of it for some time in the future when they’re sober. But where’s the fun in that when they can instead hook up while they’re both drunk enough to only half remember it in the morning?

And yeah, basically from there they end up regularly sleeping together, to the point that Sebastian rarely goes looking for someone else, and Kurt only has one or two, not-great hookups with people who aren’t Sebastian. 

And then Blaine comes in (in this world he attended neither Dalton or McKinley) and they both take a shine to him, but Blaine is uninterested in casual sex, but Sebastian encourages Kurt to keep going for it, since he knows he wants a relationship some day, but as Kurt and Blaine grow closer, Kurt starts to realize that if he starts dating Blaine… he’d have to stop seeing Sebastian. And he doesn’t understand why that idea feels like a punch to the gut. 

And that’s most of what I got at the moment.

[overcafenated]

gonna do this for loph and his bestie rozara

1. loph was hired by her ex to kill her and almost succeeded!

2. by the end of their story a little over a year.

3. loph to rozara then: a dangerous criminal that must die.

loph to rozara now: a dangerous criminal that I'd give my life to protect.

rozara to loph then: ugh, another bounty hunter.

rozara to loph now: I've killed for you, and i will again.

4. loph: My favorite stick in the mud! rozara: red.

5. absolutely! they might have almost killed each other, but they'd be dead and buried without each other.

6. not really, in all honesty.

7. they travel together, so they're pretty much never separated.

8. loph had pretty bad communication issues, but rozara is aware of that and pretty much knows exactly how to force an answer out of him.

9. severe emotional damage :]

10. their coping mechanisms! rozara copes with violence, crime, and destruction. while loph copes by withdrawing behind the safety of anonymity.

11. in a way! their story has a main theme of relationships, and they both occupy opposite ends of unhealthy dynamics, loph is the object of another characters obsession, while rozara obsesses over another character.

12. yes! rozaras love language is physical touch, so lots of hugs from her! lophs is acts of kindness, so he helps her with her equipment wherever he can.

13. used to! when they first started working together the bickered constantly, they could almost never come to any sort of agreement without an altercation first.

14. kinda? lophs life goal is to prevent a prophecy tied to his birth. rozara kind of lost her life goal, so she just decided to help loph achieve his. (without his consent)

15. with their lives. they've saved eachothers asses too many times to count.

16. they did start out very secretive from eachother, but they both eventually opened up with time.

17. yes! the secret is actually lophs identity as the child of the prophecy. It made him incredibly paranoid when they first met, but having someone he could actually talk with helped him lessen that paranoia.

18. very much permanent, they can't image a world where they part ways.

19. very satisfied.

20. post story end: killing a trickster god that tormented loph for months. before that, it'd probably be when rozara dragged loph into a bar fight, and he accidentally punched her in the face.

21. when they first met. pretty awful memory trying to murder your best friend.

22. rozaras would have to be after confronting her ex and defeating her. She broke down to loph, and he did his best to confort her. lophs was after a particularly brutal fight with a monster loph had his brain all kinds of scrambled, and after waking up from being knocked out, he just broke down to her.

23. too many to count, if your friends with one your friends with the other. enemies with one? enemies with the other aswell.

24. they joke around and banter a lot in private. They keep things a bit more professional in public.

25. how the hell are they friends???

26. they'd probably argue about whatever caused them to get put in that situation.

27. they've killed for each other, and they'd absolutely give their lives to save the other.

Questions about two of your original characters about their relationship. Should work for friends/lovers/coworkers/enemies/etc, maybe not so much for family, but you're welcome to try!

How did they meet?

How long have these two characters known each other?

What were their first impressions of each other? How does that compare to their impressions of each other now?

How would they describe each other if asked? Physically? In personality?

Do they get along? Why or why not?

Do they have any shared interests/hobbies? Do they ever do these hobbies together?

How often do they see each other? Where do they usually meet?

How do they communicate with each other? Are there any recurring phrases or gestures unique to their relationship?

What is one quality they have in common?

What is one major difference between them?

Does one act as a narrative foil to the other? How so?

Do they have any affection for each other? How do they show it?

Do they have any disdain/contempt for each other? How do they show it?

Do they share the same goals in life?

Do they trust each other? Why or why not?

Is one of them keeping secrets from the other? Why? How would they react if the secret was revealed?

Are they keeping a secret together? How do they feel about that?

Do they view their relationship as temporary or permanent?

Are they satisfied with their relationship? Do they wish they were closer/more distant?

What is their best memory together?

What is their worst memory together?

When were they the most vulnerable with each other?

Do they have any mutual friends? Mutual enemies?

How do these two interact with each other in public versus in private?

If a stranger saw them together, how would they describe their relationship?

How would these characters react to being stuck in a small room with each other?

How far would they go for each other? Would they risk their own lives for each other?

[super-unpredictable98]

The Eighth Child (~TUA AU~) - Season 3

Chapter 4: East, West, Home's Best

Warning: Strong language, mild sexual content, mention of death

(The Eighth Child Masterlist)

"Okay, gather around people," Five called as soon as we entered the hotel lobby. Most of our siblings were there, with the exception of one. "Where's Luther?"

"Haven't seen him," Diego shook his head.

"Vicky, any info on Luther?" 

"Uh... ew, he's thinking about sex," I nearly gagged. "That's zoophilia, gross!"

"I don't think you can judge other people's sexual preferences, brother fucker," Diego teased.

"Ha ha, as if you didn't have a child with your sister... And you? What were you doing fighting Alphonso earlier hah? With Stanley there, you have to be the most irresponsible dad I've ever seen! Except for ours."

"Were you spying on me? This power of yours is pretty cool, but stay out of my head, pendeja!"

"Pendeja? Seu filho da puta, vê se toma jeito! (You son of a bitch, get a grip!)" I said before realizing. 

"You two stop the bickering! Look at this, these are our mothers and they're all dead," Five flipped page by page showing everyone each of our moms. "They all died on the day that used to be our birthday, but not anymore because they never gave birth to us."

"That's dumb, if we weren't born, how can we exist?" Diego asked. "Shouldn't we start fading away like in Back to The Future?"

"Exactly! When we jumped here we created the grandfather paradox."

"And what's that?" Viktor asked.

"It's an old story, mom told me about it once. It was a boy who hated his grandpa so he time-traveled to the past to kill him. Only he killed his grandfather before his own mom could be born which leads to him never existing, so how could he ever kill his grandpa? Time collapses and everything goes to shit," I looked at Five for confirmation. "That's it, isn't it?"

"Yeah, that's it, doesn't sound very good, does it?" he huffed. 

"I'm so confused," Diego shook his head in disbelief.

"Shocking..." Allison sneered. She had been a royal pain in the ass ever since we arrived, I get how hard it is for her, but she wasn't the only one who lost people. Viktor had to give up Sissy, Diego lost Lila (at least he thought he did), and I had to see my friend Elliot murdered by those Swede bastards. Life is hard for everyone, not just for her.

"We shouldn't exist because our moms never had us, but we do, and the universe can't handle it, which is a problem," Viktor explained.

"Stanley, stop it! Now is not the time for karate!" Diego chastised my nephew who was very focused on his training.

"Mom said I need to practice," he countered.

"She's not wrong, you're pretty bad."

"And you're pretty bad at being a dad, quit it!" I snapped my fingers in front of his face. "You're talking like Reggie, only with a less posh vocabulary."

"So, we created a paradox, what does that mean?" Allison asked.

"I don't know exactly, but something very bad is coming, things are starting to disappear. Lobsters..." Five shrugged.

"A shit ton of cows," Klaus added. "It was so bad, Vicky's going back to being a vegetarian."

"Aren't you supposed to be retired?" Alli asked. "You know you can't keep dragging us through hell because you have an itch only an apocalypse can scratch."

"You really think Five wants this?" I finally snapped. "You think any of us wants this? I wanted to be buying wedding decorations and tasting cakes, instead I'm here on this timeline where I don't even exist trying to fix the world for the rest of you. I'm so sorry you are having a tough time, but you are not the only one, Wanda Maximoff! This is the only place we have, if we jump again that'll only mess the timeline even more, so you better accept that this is all we have!"

"Since when did you become Five's cheerleader? I thought you were only a shield to your little boyfriend. You think life is hard? Cause you can't buy your wedding dress? Well, I lost my daughter!"

"My headache won't fix your broken arm. We're both hurting and we both have our priorities, doesn't mean one thing is more important than the other or that you are hurting more than me. It's just different."

"Cut your bullshit, Victoria, you and your stupid philosophical sayings, it was childish when we were kids, imagine now."

Fortunately, the fight didn't escalate because Stan broke a vase with the pool club he was using to practice and silence reigned over the room. "It was the wind," he tried to shift the blame.

"That's it! I'm telling your mom! Where is she?" Diego punched the table angrily.

"Oooo I'm so scared," the boy mocked. "She's in the shower, I said she could stay with us."

"Lila is here? As if things couldn't get any worse," I cried, falling into Klaus' lap. "I can't take today anymore, I hate today. Can we just take a shower and go back to our room? I need a relaxing massage and some special attention."

"Behold, she's thinking of sex... Because that's the remedy for everything," Allison taunted.

"Just because you're not having any, don't rain on my parade. I escaped a mob of angry Amish bastards, I was nearly catapulted out of a car because of a ball of twine, I saw a rabbit being skinned. Leave me the fuck alone!"

"Don't listen to her, Vicky, she's in one of her moods," Klaus stroked my hair. "We can definitely do that after the meeting is- Five! Five don't leave!"

"I'm leaving," the little man announced as he rounded the corner to look for Lila.

"Hey, none of you heartless bastards care about our murdered moms?" Klausie asked. "Look at mine, I have her eyes, her name's Rachel. Look at my mother-in-law, cute little freckles like Vicky's, and the same mischievous look on her face. We need to find out who did this! This is the main thing!"

"What? It was obviously dad," I said, thinking he would've figured that out by now. "You heard him, he hated us in 63 so much he decided to unadopt us, but just to make sure we wouldn't be born he killed our moms and eliminated the scum before it could come out."

"You really think dad is capable of killing innocent people?" 

"Uh yeah! Dad kept me under a thousand pounds of metal every single day for fun, what would stop him from killing some women he didn't even know?" 

"I guess you're right."

"Look who decided to show, little late for the meeting, pal," Diego teased as Luther walked in, carrying a tote bag full of Sparrow merch and even wearing a Sparrow jacket. I was completely unimpressed, I knew he was a traitor from the moment we first learned how to talk and he decided to rattle me out for stealing a cookie.

"I was being held captive by the Sparrows. None of you noticed?" he asked, slightly offended.

"Oh yeah, we missed you so dearly," I nodded. "I was worried sick... Are you hurt?"

"No, they're excellent hosts! Quite charming, and you should see their gym, their house is amazing! I really think we've got these guys all wrong."

"Says the guy they kidnapped," Allison cocked an eyebrow.

"I was obligated to enter your dirty mind and see the filth going through your head, please never do that again, it was disgusting," I took the beer bottle from Klaus to take a sip. "Why were you even thinking those things while being held hostage?"

"What do they want?" Diego cut me off.

"They want Marcus, unharmed," Luther passed on their message.

"Well, we don't have Marcus," Viktor said.

"Oh, that sucks, I thought we could solve that one quickly and go on to problem number two... The disappearing people."

"Disappearing people?" I scoffed. "That's it, let's go, Klaus. I need a shower and all the rest."

"Oh? You still want all the rest even if I'm an Amish from Pennsylvania?" he giggled, following me to the elevator.

"You speak German, right?" I pressed the button to our floor and turned to him as the door closed.

"ohne Zweifel, (no doubt,)" he smirked.

"Then yeah, I do."

"Ich möchte Dich betteln hören," he pinned me against the wall, his lips inches away from mine and I already felt the palms of my hands tingling.

"You wanna hear me beg? I can beg once you're naked..."

—————————————————— 

So the world was ending again. People were disappearing now, we had to run and get things done before we all die. We wouldn't be able to dodge death when it keeps following us everywhere forever, it was like that movie Final Destination. We could try all we wanted to avoid our end, but it would always arrive and find us wherever we went.

"Heeey, Schnecke... Can we go somewhere today? Just us?" he rolled over to hold me after hours of me staring at the ceiling waiting for the sun to come up.

"Klaus! Not again, don't come at me with this shit!" I cried. "Do you even want to get married anymore?"

"Of course I do, what do you mean?"

"There's another apocalypse coming, we don't know how to stop this one because it doesn't seem like Viktor is the cause anymore. We can die or disappear at any given second and instead of worrying about the wedding, you're asking me once again to follow you into one of your stupid adventures! What am I supposed to think?"

"You're right, you're right... Can we maybe compromise?"

"What's the compromise?"

"You come with me to visit dad and ask him about our moms, then on the way back we can buy our outfits and I'll talk to Chet about the venue," Klaus suggested.

"Okay fine, but how do you expect to get passed security again and get into the house without being trampled on by those assholes?" I asked.

"Remember how we used to sneak out through the window?" 

"Yeah, but we can't do that, people will see us."

"There's another way inside..."

"NO! Klaus! No! I'm not doing that again, no way!"

I knew what he wanted. One time when dad shut the windows closed right after my accident falling from the second floor, we had to find another way to get out so we could get our doughnut fix. So Klaus had the brilliant idea to crawl through the sewers like we were in some Stephen King novel. 

It was one of the worst experiences of my life, and that's saying a lot! I can still remember the smell and it makes my stomach churn. I couldn't believe he wanted me to do it again, and all because we wanted to... Talk to dad? It was insane.

"Pretty please?" he pouted, batting those eyes at me. "It would mean so much to know what happened to my mother. I don't wanna do this alone, Vickynha! Please? It's not like you can get hurt or catch anything."

"Fiiiiine! But we're getting the outfits on the way back, so we better manage to take a shower at the mansion, I'm not trying on wedding dresses covered in sewage!"

"I promise, I'll take another beating just so you can take a shower. Thank you so much!"

Klaus managed to find us some diving suits, swimming caps, snorkel shit... And of course, two trenchcoats so we wouldn't go out in the street looking like a pair of lunatics. It didn't really help, but at least all eyes were not on my future husband's bulge.

As soon as he opened that lid I wanted to run back to the hotel. The smell was almost unbearable, but Klaus didn't seem bothered. He, in fact, seemed nostalgic, last time we did that we were 13 and imagined life would be different, happy, so maybe that's why the smell was comforting to him.

"That takes me back..." he said, dropping his trenchcoat and making his way down. 

"If we find a killer clown in there, I'm letting it eat you," I huffed, following him inside. "Ugh, the things you make me do."

"Oh stop it, you love me," he smirked.

I made a vow to myself to be totally honest and open when telling this story, but I really don't think I have the stomach to relive what happened in the sewers. I can tell you all I was never the same after that, the things I've seen in there will haunt me forever. I regret taking Klaus' deal several times while we swam through that shit (literally) to arrive at dad's office. 

"See? Not that bad," he said as he helped out of the pipe. 

"Oh yeah, I definitely don't wanna throw up and cry right now..." I rolled my eyes, taking off my suit to reveal the bikini underneath.

"Wow, that's what you chose to wear?" Klaus stared at me and his thoughts were so loud I could listen to them without even trying. 

"It made sense to me, a swimming suit under the diving suit. Stop thinking that, we're covered in shit!" I scolded.

"Sorry, but your ass looks really good right now, I'm only human!" he cried, getting out of his suit, he was wearing yet another skin-tight suit, but this one had his chest completely exposed and in between the two layers, he had a blue speedo on. 

"You look like Borat and Lady Gaga had a child," I tried not to laugh.

"Have at you!" Dad finally noticed us and grabbed a wooden back scratcher in the form of a little hand to use as a sword against us. I yelped, but as soon as I noticed what he was holding I heaved a sigh of relief.

"Did you do it?" Klaus asked, grabbing one of the little statues from the mantelpiece to counterattack. 

"What are you talking about? How did you get in here?" 

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to, dad..." I muttered.

"Did you kill our moms?" Klausie asked again. "Please just tell me if you killed them and we'll leave."

"After a shower," I added.

"After a shower," he nodded. "Please just tell us."

"I don't care enough about you to lie, do I look fit to murder anyone?" dad lowered his guard. 

"Not now, but I remember you, you were scary and horrible and a sadist! You'd love to make sure none of us are born!" I took the statue from my fiancé and put it back in place. 

"I remember you two better now. You're the drunk one and you're the childish one."

"No, I'm Klaus, the spiritual one," he argued. "And this is Victoria, the... Hot one."

"That's all I am to you? The hot one?" I turned to him, baffled.

"Victoria, the... Motherly one, the one who bakes, the interesting one, the caring one, the beautiful one?"

Before I could respond, we heard a knock on the door and ran to hide. We couldn't see who was there but we heard Jayme and Alphonso coming in with food and pills for dad. They insisted he took them and then forced him to sign some papers he didn't know anything about. I tried to read his mind and get any clues, but it was very confusing.

"His brain is a haze, he's totally doped," I whispered. 

"Who? Dad?" Klaus gasped quietly and I nodded.

The way they treated him made me almost sad for a second, I felt bad for him and that was a first! They threatened him and made mean comments, even after everything our father put us through, I couldn't help worrying. 

"Oh my God, dad... What happened to you?" Klaus asked when the others left and we finally came out of hiding. 

"How did we not have that idea?" I thought out loud. "They treat you like some sort of senile old man. You used to be an asshole, but you're the most respectable asshole I've ever met. Reginald Hargreeves, The Monocle, stuck in a room being drugged by his kids?"

"I sometimes wonder what happened to me as well," Reginald stared vacantly at the tv. "You kids better take a shower, you may use mine, but please leave it the same way you found it, in order."

"Thanks, dad," I dragged Klaus, who had many other questions but the smell was really starting to bother me and I couldn't handle it anymore.

That wasn't the man who raised us, that was very much clear. And though most of the changes in the timeline were concerning and disturbing, I found that one very comforting. Maybe there was a chance this father could like us. Maybe not like us, but at least not hate us.

When we came out of the shower, without saying a word to each other, we found two robes waiting, a gesture that was so small and yet nearly brought me to tears. We both got dressed and helped dry each other's hair like we did as kids. 

"That is much better, is it not?" Dad looked us up and down when we came out of the bathroom. "Now why would you think I murdered your mothers?"

"You hated us so much that you unadopted us, is it so crazy to think you wouldn't want us to even exist?" I sat by him on the couch.

"Seems I might've misjudged you, after all, you ended up saving the world in 63, so you must have done something right. I must admit I didn't even think of murdering your mothers as a solution."

"If we tell you we saved the world with the power of love will you believe us?" Klaus joined, wrapping one arm around me. 

"I find it hard to comprehend how love would stop an impending apocalypse, but anything is possible these days..." Reggie pointed at the TV where a news anchor was reporting on the rapidly growing number of missing people around the world, but before it was over, he changed channels to watch The Hunchback of Notre Dame instead.

"Oh, I love this movie," Klaus chuckled. "Vicky here likes the Disney version more, don't you, Schatz?"

"I am not the least bit surprised," father said, and I could hear him thinking once again about how my face makes me look like a child.

"Hey! It had some of the most beautiful songs ever, God Help the Outcasts is a masterpiece and Hellfire? The best Disney villain song ever written!" I tried to argue, but it only made Klaus' smile widen even more.

"Never turn your back, kids," dad said totally unprompted. "Especially on your children. You do your best, give them your all, but it's too much. Then it's pills in the porridge and something extra in the tea, next thing you know you signed your life away. All your dreams have been quashed, all your plans run aground, and the worst of it? No one ever comes to visit anymore. But you wouldn't understand that."

"Wouldn't we?" I quickly rubbed my eyes to stop any tears from falling. 

"Reggie, you have no idea," Klaus murmured, laying on my shoulder. "Have you ever been to a Baskin Robbins?"

"Can't say that I have," dad looked at us intrigued.

"They're like... You know the ones, they're half a Dunkin' Donuts and they're open all night, and it's 3 a.m, and nobody's switching out those giant empty tubs of fudge ripple. That's me! I feel like scoop after scoop after scoop has been taken out of me. Brother... Lover... A whole world... And now my mom. I don't have many scoops left, I only have two."

"Two?" his brows furrowed, certainly curious.

"Two, my Victoria," Klaus looked up at me with dreamy eyes. "And my pretty face. Once I lose that, I lost everything."

This boy's devotion reminds me of how I used to be like with Abigail, I heard the old man thinking.

"Who's Abigail?" I asked without hesitation.

"I forgot you can read minds, can't you, young lady?" dad asked.

"Yes, and I'm getting better at it."

"I see that. Abigail is none of your concern, I kindly ask you to stay out of my head, please. I have no idea what you two are talking about anyhow."

"I just feel like if I could find out who killed them, I'd have closure on-" Klaus continued, but was interrupted by dad.

"Do you want some ice cream? Would that shut you up?"

"Yeah, yeah I do," he grinned, nudging my arm. 

Father got up and I couldn't help imaging how my childhood would've been like if this Reggie was my father instead of the one we had back then. He tried to grab a couple of bowls, but one of them slipped from his grasp and fell, shattering all over the place. 

"Damn pills..." he cursed, looking truly embarrassed of his own behavior.

"Don't worry," I got down on my knees to clean it up, like I've always done my entire life for everyone around me. In a literal and metaphorical way, I've spent my whole life cleaning messes. "It happens to everyone."

"I can help you with that," Klaus offered. 

"The ice cream?" father asked. 

"No, the pills. If you don't wanna take them..."

"No no no, that's against the rules, I have to take them every day."

"All you have to do is just pop to the side, right here," he opened his mouth and pointed at the spot with his fingers. "And ta-da! Old necessary rehab trick."

"Huh," Reginald looked at me as I gathered the shards with my hands, then at my fiancé. "I didn't care for you when last we met, I thought the nature of your relationship was perverted and honestly disgusting, but I must admit you kids are growing on me."

Those words immediately brought tears to my eyes again, and this time I wasn't able to hold them. I exchanged a look with Klaus, knowing he felt the exact same way I did. We had never heard an I love you, or I'm proud of you, we never had a hug or a dad joke, we never felt loved. So this little kernel of affection meant more to us than anyone could possibly imagine. 

"Are your hands all right?" dad asked after I was done cleaning, noticing I was crying. 

"I'm also super-resistant, remember? I can't get cut like that," I explained. "I'm just a little emotional, you know? PMS."

After giving us our ice cream, Reggie sat back down to watch TV. We enjoyed that moment like Charlie Bucket enjoyed his yearly Wonka bar. 

We savored dad's company, trying to save every second of it in our brains so we'd always remember what it felt like to just do something everyone does with their dads, what it felt like to be normal for once.

Eventually, Reggie fell asleep and we decided it was time to leave. We still had the second part of the deal to honor, so we cleaned up after ourselves and prepared our escape plan. Initially, I would jump through the window and then help Klaus down, but something caught our attention. 

"Oblivion," dad murmured in his sleep.

"Oblivion?" I mouthed back at Klaus and he shrugged. 

"When he's asleep like this he's not so terrible... Wait, do you hear this?" his brows furrowed at the distant sound of mom singing. I don't think I've ever heard mom singing, humming yes, but singing? I didn't even know she was programmed for that.

Without having to say anything, we both headed to the basement where her voice was coming from to see what was going on in there. The risk of bumping into one of the Sparrows and having to fight again was quite high, but we were too curious to care, even more because the song she was singing was some sort of religious chanting.

"Wow!" Klaus giggled when he saw the huge ball of light in the middle of the room, it looked like a smaller version of the sun and I could hear electricity sounds coming from it. That couldn't be good...

Mom passed us by without even acknowledging our presence, too focused on the big bright light. She stopped in front of it and started to worship like some sort of deity, which definitely gave me Destiny's Children flashbacks.

"The Lord! The Lord is upon me!" she exclaimed and started to mutter a bunch of nonsense.

"Let's go, let's get out of here before she summons a demon or something," I pushed Klaus towards the back door, I just wanted to get out of that house as fast as possible, I didn't even care if we would bump into those shitty knock-offs. "I think mom is broken."

"You think? I thought she was about to start singing the Ragatanga. What was that like? Aserehe..."

"Aserehe ra de re de hebe tu de hebere seibiunouba mahabi an de bugui an de buididipi," I said as if that exact sequence of nonsensical words were my native language. 

"That's it," he carefully closed the door behind us and we could finally breathe, even though we were both wearing only swimsuits and robes.

"You remember the Ragatanga?" I laughed, thinking of that Jayme-induced dream I had the other day. "Remember how Diego was mad every time we started singing that?"

"Yeah and you taught everyone the choreography so we could do it to piss him off," he smiled, certainly assaulted by those old memories as well. "Good times... Actually horrible times, but having you there made it not so bad. Come on, let's get our trenchcoats and go shopping."

—————————————————— 

"I don't know how I feel about this one..." I turned in front of the mirror wearing the fifth wedding dress I picked that day. "I think it's pretty, but do I feel like a princess bride in it? Do I feel like my life is a fairytale?"

"I wouldn't know..." Klaus groaned, leaning back into his seat, I wrapped the thick robe sash around his eyes so he wouldn't be able to see my dress before the actual wedding. "I usually like being blindfolded, but right now it's a pain in my ass, just let me see it!"

"No, Klausie! It's bad luck for the groom to see the dress before the wedding, you know that!"

"You saw my suit, you even helped me choose, how is that fair?"

It was true, I did help pick the gorgeous green velvet suit that kinda looked a bit like one of those '70s jumpsuits, a little Donna and the Dynamos, but still very classy. Klaus would look so handsome in it for our big day!

"Yeah, but there are no rules about the bride seeing the suit."

"I'm the only person who can help you right now, Liebling! All our other siblings are doing boring apocalypse shit," he whined while I changed into the sixth dress of the day. "Maybe I can look as your brother, your favorite brother. That's still me, right? And there are no rules against that!"

"Ugh! Why did Ben have to go into the light? He would be perfect for this job..." I looked in the mirror and immediately hated what I saw, deciding to try on the seventh dress instead. "I can't let you see it because you might be my brother, but you are still my groom so that would ruin everything!"

You know that moment when you are talking somewhere very crowded and everyone else is being loud so you have to speak up more and more until you say something super embarrassing or incriminating and suddenly the room goes quiet and everyone hears what you just said? Well, that's what happened to me in that bridal store.

If dirty, weirded-out looks could kill, I'd be dead. Klaus certainly noticed what happened because he started uncontrollably cackling and even forgot about the stupid blindfold and his complaints about not seeing my dress.

"It's fine, we're adopted! I mean not like that..." I tried to shout, but no one seemed to care.

"I take it back, I'm loving this," he wheezed. "This is so funny, I love you so much."

"Shut up!" I finally looked in the mirror and gasped. "Oh my God, this is it... I knew I'd know when I saw it, and I do! This is my dress, this makes me feel like a princess and it's sexy, I love it, it's perfect!"

"I'm glad you found it, sis," he teased. "Can we just pick your shoes so I can take this thing off?"

"I'm gonna wear Allison's flats, those glittery ones, it'll be my something borrowed," I changed out of the dress as quickly as possible and ran to the front to pay for it and hide it inside of those big black bags where Klaus wouldn't be able to peek. I even planned to leave it with Viktor so nobody would see it. 

"Are you ready?" Klaus asked before taking the blindfold off.

"Yeah, you can look now."

"I can't wait to see it, but I'd marry you even in that swimsuit... Well, especially in that swimsuit," he smirked, stealing a kiss as we left the store. "You should wear it more often."

"Oh fuck!" I stopped, my heart jumping with terror.

"What? We forgot something?" 

"Jayme and Alphonso just died," I breathed. I could see them, I don't know whose mind I was reading, but I saw a blast taking them both out and nearly killing Christopher, Ben, Fei, and Sloane as well. 

"Who?" Klaus asked.

"That tiny one with the black venom and the big weird-looking one from Brazil," I explained, thinking about that conversation from the day of the first fight. "Hey, maybe I should be more like him, Alphonso I mean."

"What? Who would wanna be like him? He's like a human blob!" 

"First of all, that's pretty insensitive. Second of all, he told me something that day that kinda stuck with me. He said with my power if I gained more mass I could possibly absorb the impact of hits and send it back to the person hitting me."

"More mass? So you'd have to gain weight like I told you already..."

"Yeah, yeah, but maybe if I start working out I could gain more muscle, that must be amazing to absorb the impact! Look at Luther, he might be stupid, but he gets up pretty quick after a fight, he can take hit after hit after hit."

"Okay, so what I'm hearing is," Klaus squealed with joy. "Muscle mommy."

"What?" I laughed. 

"Muscle mommy! You're gonna look so sexy, oh fuck, I'll want you to crush my head with your thighs, lift me up in your strong arms! You have my full support."

"O-okay, thanks, Klausie. Now let's go see the damage with the Sparrows before you get a boner in the middle of the street."

"Might be a little late for that..."

[bonnielunkas]

may i present the main star of the rockstar parlor ; baby!!

`` baby is the leader of the parlor rockers and is also knows at the " parlor princess. " she is friendly and cheerful, though hides quiet a bit of sass and snark behind that grin of hers. while she can bicker with the other members of the band, music man especially, she still loves them all. `` - baby's blurb on the rockstar parlor website

( actual info about baby is below the cut )

so, following the fire in pizza sim, elizabeth's soul is detached from scrap baby, leaving scrap baby by herself. she doesn't mind though, as she constantly fought elizabeth for control of her own body. and while baby usually won, it was tiring to say the least. with lizzie gone though, baby was virtually free to do whatever she pleased. one problem; she was far too damaged to actually move. she could only speak, and even then that was shoddy at best. so, once micheal and eggs come back to check on the rubble to make sure that william is gone and the remaining souls are put to rest, they find baby. micheal decides to fix her up himself, really not caring about the fact she's part of the reason why he's currently a walking corpse, and makes sure to remove all the child murder stuff since that's not gonna fly. and then once micheal tells her him and eggs' plan to rebuild the location and re-open, he offers her the spot of mascot, which she happily accepts

other stuff :]

baby's bandmates are funtime chica, music man, and lefty! their owners are all ambiguous so it's not like micheal and eggs are gonna get in that much legal trouble, right?? baby's favorite bandmate is chica btw they're basically besties

she can make icecream!! three flavors too; vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry :]

baby designed her outfit all by herself!! thankfully, micheal also knows how to sew. in her words, she's " the princess of the roller rink! " ( she still has the kickass skates btw )

she still struggles a lot with her own identity and her past, and is pretty worried about hurting another child. she's aware all her dangerous bits are gone, but it's still something in the back of her mind.

[iris-sistibly]

Eversince they left Kaer Morhen, Ciri had been training non-stop. Geralt continues to mentor her in sword fighting and he must say she improved a lot. It's no surprise since her grandmother, Queen Calanthe was a formidable warrior herself. The Witcher couldn't help but feel proud of his little cub as what Jaskier would call her (though Ciri hates being called 'little').

Training can be exhausting and brutally painful, but he never once heard Ciri complain. In fact, she is the one who's putting so much pressure on herself and he would constantly remind her to take things one at a time. She would often roll her eyes or pout but she listens anyway, raising a child is no easy feat.

Good thing he's not alone, there's Jaskier who has been acting like a tough uncle on the exterior but is actually easy to give in and spoils Ciri a lot. As annoying as he is, the princess is comfortable being around Jaskier, he makes her laugh and let her be a child as she should. Although the bard himself can be a youngster sometimes especially when they bicker, Ciri would always end up winning an argument given her brilliant comebacks. Jaskier would end up ranting on how Ciri takes after her father, "That little cub is definitely you in a young girl's body!" he would complain to him, "Thankfully she's the only child you'll ever have, otherwise it would surely be the death of me!"

Geralt would usually reply with a shrug or a "Hm," but sometimes he likes to irritate the shit out of Jaskier, "Trust me when I say she's nastier than me, but I must admit your level of intelligence is far from hers."

Jaskier scoffed, "I really hate you sometimes."

"So am I, everyday."

Admittedly, Yennefer had been a huge help too not only in helping Ciri control her powers, but also teaching things that only a woman can like how to deal with her first blood (period) and relieving menstrual cramps. Things that Geralt has no knowledge of.

Still, he doesn't trust the woman.

Geralt never took his eyes off of Yen and Ciri whenever they're together, he hasn't forgiven her for what she's done to his child. Hell if she did sacrifice Ciri he would have beheaded her right on the spot, then he would have spent the rest of his life mourning and carrying the pain of losing his daughter and murdering the woman he loves. Deep inside his love for her remained, but betrayal is a sin that's almost impossible to forgive.

Whenever the four of them gather together for a meal, it's always painfully awkward. They would sit and eat in silence, Jaskier and Ciri try to break the tension by starting up light conversations but Geralt and Yennefer hardly respond. They wouldn't even make eye contact with each other, although Geralt occasionally glance at her.

He can sense she's doing the same, but everytime he felt like Yennefer is trying to talk to him he'd always avoid (except when it's about Ciri of course), he wasn't sure how to talk to her without that urge to spew words that are terrible enough to hurt her. Keeping his distance would be best for the two of them.

"Come along now Ciri, time for bed," he stood up after finishing his food.

"B-But Geralt, there are still a couple of things I need to ask Yen..."

"Cirilla," his voice sounded firm this time. The girl knew when her father starts calling her by her real name, it meant don't make him repeat himself. "Goodnight Jaskier, Yennefer," she mouthed the word 'sorry' to the latter before following Geralt back to their tent, leaving Yen with the bard at the campfire.

Geralt helped Ciri fix her bed, "Tomorrow before dawn we leave this place, but we'll stop by the nearest town first thing so we could gather supplies."

"Aren't you getting tired Geralt?"

"I am exhausted my child, but we cannot stop unless we find out more about your power, and we can't stay in one place for too long because Nilfgaard and hell knows how many others have been trying to track us down."

"No, I don't mean that...I meant you and Yennefer, don't you feel tired ignoring and acting cold towards her? She's been trying to talk to you but you keep pushing her away."

At times, Geralt wished Ciri wouldn't be this vocal. He sighed, "Just because I enlisted her help doesn't mean I already entrusted you to her entirely, she tried to kill you remember?"

"But she didn't, instead she sacrificed herself to save me. I am here because of her," Ciri placed her hand on his, "You're my father Geralt, I understand that you're protecting me...but Yennefer saved my life too, and I used that as a stepping stone to forgive her, though I must admit it will take time for me to fully trust her again but...I'm trying my best. I won't force you to talk to her if you're not ready, but I hope one day you'll find it in you to forgive. That's the first step towards healing right?"

Geralt was taken aback at what Ciri said, that innocent girl who came to his life as a surprise is not only becoming stronger but also wiser, "There is not a day that you haven't given me reasons to be proud of you, I hope you're aware of that."

Ciri smiled, "Jaskier says I'm a lot like you."

"You are much better than me," he corrected, "And I appreciate your advice but it's getting late, you have to sleep."

Ciri groaned but plopped herself onto her duvet, Geralt tucked her in.

"Goodnight Geralt," Ciri said afterwards.

Usually, the witcher would spend the rest of the night guarding his daughter while she sleeps but he decided to breathe some fresh air outside. To his surprise, Yennefer was all alone by the campfire, her magnificent purple eyes were fixed on the flame. Jaskier has already retired to his tent and is now snoring away.

After heeding his daughter's advice, he finally decided to talk to Yennefer...again. The latter was surprised when Geralt sat beside her. The mage felt nervous because she's aware of how angry and disappointed he was towards her, and she can't blame him for ignoring her existence most of the time. But still she was hopeful that one day he'll forgive her just like what Ciri did.

Geralt cleared his throat to break the silence, "Can't sleep?" he asked afterwards, trying to sound casual. Yennefer couldn't believe what she's hearing, this was the first time he talked to her (not Ciri-related) in a long time.

"Not yet, what about you? Shouldn't you be resting too?"

"You know I don't sleep."

"Then... shouldn't you be keeping an eye on your little girl?"

"Hm."

Another awkward silence, Yennefer took a deep breath and initiated another conversation, "Geralt about what happened last time..."

"The first time I met Ciri we were in the woods, she was running towards me, alone and afraid. When I first held her in my arms I swore to myself that I would do everything in my power to keep her safe, and I've killed every single one of those fuckers who tried to harm her, I thought it was just my job as her protector. But the more I got to know her the more I understood that she's not just some princess that I have to defend," Geralt locked eyes with Yennefer, "She gave me a purpose, a reason to live, and she made me realize that I can do that one thing I thought I am never capable of."

"Being a parent?"

Geralt nodded, "I'd bleed for her Yen, there's nothing I wouldn't do to keep her alive...So when you..." he tried so hard to suppress his anger, "When you did that I thought of how hypocritical you were, you wanted a child so badly yet you're willing to sacrifice mine for your own selfish ambition, that felt like a dagger being pierced through my chest...and it made me angry and disappointed, you were the least person I expected to betray us. I never thought entrusting Ciri's life to someone I also deeply care about would result into almost losing her."

Yennefer knew how much Geralt resented her, but hearing those words made her feel horrible, like she's the worst person alive.

"Ciri's life is the most valuable for me, her importance is above everyone else's."

Yennefer nodded, "I know...and I'm very sorry Geralt, I know no amount of reasoning could justify what I did but I regret it, I really do."

"I forgive you."

Yen was surprised at what Geralt said, she was too stunned to utter a single word.

"I thank you for saving her, but trusting you once more is a longer and harder process..."

"I know, and I'll do everything I can to regain your and Ciri's trust, I promise."

"I'm looking forward to that too."

After their conversation, Geralt went back to their tent. Ciri was whimpering and shaking, she was mumbling the words, "Stay away from me" and "help." She's the bravest girl he knows but he also felt bad for her, having been subjected to a life that no child deserves. But he was determined to ease her pain and burdens, he held her hand and whispered, "Ciri it's alright...I am here, and I'll always keep you safe...my little cub."

She must have heard his voice in her dream, her tensed body started to relax again and before he knew it, she was already sleeping soundly.

Maybe he should ask Yennefer how to stop Ciri's nightmares, surely there must be some kind of spell to help her sleep better. He has no idea how to mend his relationship with Yen, for now his goal is to make sure his daughter is well-protected, taught and cared for.

Perhaps one day, when he and Ciri are both ready, they could leave the past behind and continue to move forward. And maybe...just maybe when their wounds have completely healed, they could start over again.

Yennefer wished for it...

But so did Geralt.

Broken pieces (by: Iris)

*

I can't remember the last time I wrote a fanfic but here I am 😅

Anyway, it seems that a lot of people have mixed feelings about The Witcher series on Netflix, I personally enjoyed the show so I thought it would be nice to write a fanfic based on the events that took place in season 2 finale. But I'm curious about the novels so I'd probably read them if I have time 🙏🙏🙏

Credits:

Screenshots from The Witcher (S2), episodes 1 and 8

(P.S. I know the SS are a little off but I'm fucking sleepy already so leave it be hahaha!)

[chasingfictions]

Okay so seeing red fix it was amazing! I know I commented like, a lot, so I'm not gonna wax poetic here

But I DID want to share that with you getting back into the Faith fic and we get toxic Dangel coparenting i am SO excited for it. I can only think about, like, the vibes of how they're going to parent. The potential of a world with More Darla. And obviously you're writing it and i'll love whatever you do, and i am not trying to Impose My Opinions on you but i have this thing in my head I want to share. You know that robert downey jr with kid vs chris hemsworth with kid meme? that's Angel & Darla.

ANYWAY, I'm so excited to see Darla NOT get killed because ats says that women are inherently only of worth when they die for male angst and mystical pregnancies

congratulations again on finishing seeing red fix-it <3

THANK YOU <3333

no yea im really excited to get back into the faith series !!!!! literally the past several angst installments ive kept sneaking away into my part 6 outline to write more darla angel childrearing bickering :)))) the way i love them. the way i LOVE THEM. the way what if you had to coparent a child with your murdermotherwife who you killed for a 16 year old slayer you'd just met and also she wont stop flirting with the other slayer who is also your best friend and also she wont stop commenting about / mocking the fact that youre obviously in love with cordelia and also keeps literally murdering people because she's a soulless vampire but you cant kill her for it because she's literally the mother of your child. what then.

second of all ur so right about that meme and also i had to do this:

[boysl0vingboys]

EPISODE NINE THOUGHT PROCESS

1/4

do I look like I need a recap? My heart is still broken from last week.

YOU'RE MAKING ME RELIVE IT!

FUCK OFF WAI!!!

THE FUCKING SOUND GUY!

Wai... step away from sound-

I hate you.

In all fairness, it was nothing in the beginning.

I

HATE

HIM

I HATE HIM SO MUCH!!!!!

... you terrible dickhead i hope you choke on hot sauce from stepping on a lego

Last performance? I didn't get to see any :(

wai, you can choke.

Pran, don't worry lovely you don't need that toxic energy.

the wrong person is apologising here.

don't you dare try to make him feel guilty you filthy gaslighting asshole.

Engineering boys, I have hope for you-

by doing nothing you are picking sides you idiot.

KORN FOR THE WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT IS HOW YOU BE A BEST FRIEND! WAI TAKE SOME NOTES!

Cute boyfriends.

Today, on this two showing how single I am... this cute crap

wait what- pat, we did not go through all this for a fake break up!

hand...? Hand? Hand!

and back to the bullshite- wai, I will peak your eyes out, I swear-

why would you pair them?

ha ha wai, you suck.

WHERE ARE THE SUBS!

Boyfriend it here :)

(and the product placement)

Pat you fucking weirdo, I love you.

I am okay if Pat murders Wai, in fact I encourage it.

2/4

in-laws content

the gay teasing the lesbian :)

boyfriend energy

i trade you bisexual Pat for pansexual!Pat?

On a real note though, I am so happy they actually talked about this and made fun of the 'only like you' trope that I hate so much.

LESBIAN content!

Pa ! just say you like her!

THAT IS LESBIAN ACTIVITY!

You admitted to hitting on her?!

Ink, you can't just say uno-reverse. I reject it.

Cuddly boyfriends:)

That wasn't a no, Pran.

I need more in-law moment honestly.

FUCK OFF! Can we just throw him down-

Hi, Pat. :)

Pat, no, sweetie, what are you-?

Pran, don't give in.

noooooooooooooooooooooooooo

guys, your ohmnanon is showing.

sit with them sit with them sit with them sit with them sit with them !

did I just see a white guy? 0.o?

nice hair

communication is key. but I don't like Wai so, KICK HIS ASS!

Korn's hand on his shoulder, I'm going to shed a tear.

go sit with your boyfriend if we're doing this.

NOT THE FLOFFY BOY!

adorable cheering- did you just almost run into a pole?

happy little boyfriend.

and they're cheering together!

the gays out here bringing the department together.

(still hate Wai though)

Wai! Do you ever just shut the fuck up?

Korn, my sweet baby, just leave him.

'nice mouth' kinda gay bro,

3/4

2... 1.... WHAT THE FUCK!

Pat, don't be horny on main.

wait for it... he has that face going, that's my boy.

MY WIFI JUST CUT OUT! NEVER MIND IT"S BACK

yes.

stay.

0.0 pran voice just, with the-

Korn, I love you, but leave.

how did I only just notice he is wearing a towel?

I want to be part of the lovely couple but honestly I am Korn.

'don't fight' Korn, it's not fighting, it's bickering affectionately.

Wai... you're the reason my boy ends up in hospital, aren't you?

is that Angelina-?

IS THAT A GUN! I KNEW YOU LOOKED TOO AMERICAN!

I have a feeling he isn't kidding. Is he cute, Korn?

Pat, he has a gun. Sit your ass back down.

PAT!

My baby is about to get shot.

... Wai, just say he has a gun.

THERES A GUN!

DOES NO ONE SEE THE GUN!

THE GUN! THE GUN!

(this is where I shut down for a good two minutes.)

You know they know they broke us when the next part airs immediately after the other.

4/4

i don't care about motorbikes I care about my child.

korn, the fuck are you wearing?

don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.

you fucking asshole!

I literally was about to CRY!

that's not how bullet holes work.

Don't jinx it.

THE FUCK YOU MEAN, 'I pReSuMe IT's YoUrS'

Wai. Fuck off.

Anywhere? Like America?

Wai, don't fuck this up. Hand the evidence over.

Wai?

Wai actually did something redempable?

Use the fucking stairs!

YOU're Young!

You have legs!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's right bitch! Get the fuck out!

Back to cute boyfriend mode!

Bickering boyfriends! Even better.

I still don't like you.

No.

Go away.

Ohhh~ Wife!Pat.

And the kissing doesn't show you've grown closer?

Pran what was that?

Bad feeling. What's happening?

Awh, hand kiss.

What? What? What?!

OH COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate it here! Come ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

Sure, just show me the trailer.

So next episode is a Sherlock Holmes-?

Was that his Dad? WAS THAT HIS FUCKING DAD!

[guess-that-ship]

S10 Semifinals*

the most tsundere father-daughter duo known to man

cw: child abuse/neglect, parental death, spoilers

Four years before the start of the story, an amnesiac detective (A) takes a child (B) into his home because she was abused by her mother and neglected by her father. The two had a rocky start to their relationship, and a rocky four years as the two bickered, clashed against each other, and kept things from each other due to their stubborn natures. As little as either would wish to admit it, though, the two grew to care about each other and A taught B how to fight so she could defend herself against bullies (which she then also used to fight him).

Things grow more complicated when B's parents are murdered, and A is assigned to the case. Despite A's best efforts, B gets involved in trying to solve the case, the two both have to grapple with the loss of her parents, with A struggling to support B through it. Both have complicated relationships about family- B never had a stable home life with her biological family, and A can't remember his- but despite A thinking he isn't a fit guardian for her, the two of them found family with each other.

Lightning Strikes Twice

The Blade has known only violence their whole life. Raised from childhood to be a weapon, they're an efficient, brutal killer. They strike like lightning, swift and deadly, with no room for anything besides the bloodshed they've spent their existence wading through. And they're perfectly fine with it, until they meet the Rope, who looks at them and sees something no one else has: a person, worthy of attention for more than the violence they reap.

The Rope is a cunning man, charming and roguish with a quick smile and a quicker trigger finger. He has big dreams for how to fix a world that's rotten to the core, but no means to accomplish them… until he meets the Blade. What starts as fascination turns to admiration, as he realizes this broken person raised by death might be exactly what he needs to burn away the rot.

Lightning strikes and a fire ignites. The Blade cuts down anyone the Rope asks them to, and the Rope lavishes them with love and praise for every life they take in his name. He gives them purpose and identity outside of what they were created for, and for that they are determined to always stay by the side. They say love changes you for the better, and the Blade is inclined to agree.

*Ship does not have to be romantic.

[messinwitheddie]

Squee "That's literally the only reason I'm considering this."

Nny "But he's such a repugnant little demon bastard. Think for a moment; What is he going to ask in return for his generosity should he chose to bestow it upon you, hu? Your eternal loyalty and left nut?"

Squee "Let me deal with it. Pepito's classic Chevvy is my only way to get to the ML building unless I take a bus. My social anxiety flairs up in situations like long drives on crowded moving vehicles. Soooo bumming a ride from my asshole demon-child buddy it is."

Nny "Do you honestly think he's going to let you borrow his car? Is it even HIS car? Is it really his dad's car?"

Squee "He's my best friend. It couldn't hurt to ask."

Nny "HE'S your best friend? Here, give the knife in my chest a nice hard twist while you're at it."

Squee "He's my best friend that's my age, I should specify. Not saying much because he's my only friend and he too makes my anxiety spike...Sweet; he's still up. He says come over. You wanna take a walk? I'm heading to his house."

Nny "What? Oh, yeah... I haven't been on a nice night walk in a long time. Just...give me a few more minutes..."

Squee "Sure...you ok?"

Nny "Yes...It's so quiet here now. Not complaining the least little bit trust me. .. it's surreal, standing here with only me and you... and... the memories... but no voices. I keep listening. I keep expecting to hear the harsh whispers of Mr. Eff and Psycho Doughboy bickering just outside my drawing room over the necessity, or lack thereof, of my murderous rampage and overall existence--

or Burger Boy's malevolent coaxing--

or Nailbunny's incessant Jimminy fucking Cricket nagging...but I think they're finally...ACTUALLY gone...All GONE!! *chuckled*

I'm relieved; you can't even fathom how relieved I am to be in this house and hear NOTHING but the roaches scurry! This silence.. This clarity, it's all I ever wanted...

And as clear as my thoughts are, I still can't tell you WHY in the name of sacred FUCK I did the horrible things that I did. I try to remember; to pinpoint the key event that caused my reality to shatter, but I don't know when exactly the darkness infested me. I don't know how things went so SO wrong. I don't know what I was thinking! I remember the venomous cocktail of trauma and negative emotions, but I can't formulate any kind of logic from it; not anymore.

Now I look back at my life and just go "what the fuck was my malfunction? Wow, Nny, chill the fuck out. Just brush it off. Enjoy your takeout and admire the beauty of the cityscape under moonlight..."...but it wasn't that easy then...

You probably think I'm full of shit, but that's the God's- honest truth. I have NO justification or explanation for the horrible horrible thoughts in my living brain or the ghoulish impulses I acted upon time and time again."

Squee "You were sick. You were in pain. A LOT of pain. You had difficulty coping. You didn't have the support you needed when it counted. You never got the right help you needed in time and others suffered with you because of it."

Nny "Was I evil? Was I just one more bad thing on Earth that never should have existed and needed to die?"

Squee "You weren't an evil person. You did bad things. Everyone does bad things."

Nny "I nailed a bunny to a wall, Squee. That bunny never hurt me. What other word would you use to define the kind of person I was?"

Squee "I was afraid of you for years, but I never believed you were evil. Even if you were, you were the only adult I ever met who seemed to care about my wellbeing. I could have tried harder to stop you and saved dozens of people, but I was selfish and kept turning a blind eye to you."

Nny "God, Squee-"

Squee "I heard screams in my bedroom coming from next door, but never got out of bed to dial 911. I watched you drag people out of your trunk and into your house late at night, but never reported it to the cops. I told my parents, but a part of me knew they wouldn't believe me or wouldn't give a shit or both. I never "snitched". I wanted to protect myself from your wrath in case you ever decided I was next...and after I was convinced you wouldn't kill me, I started to really like having a kind of big brother figure around. So, if we're really going to pick apart morality and shitty, selfish deeds; am I not just as evil as you? Maybe even worse because I'm also a coward?"

Nny "NO! It wouldn't have made a difference had you intervened. You had no power over me or my situation. It wasn't your responsibility to fix me or or anything of the sort. I needed to help myself, but I was so convinced I was beyond help. Shit, now I really am beyond help. There's nothing I can do now, not that redemption was possible after the first dozen mutilations... Dead is dead is dead. This is it for me.

I'm SO indescribably sad that I spent what were SUPPOSED to be the best years of my life giving into all the hatred and fear and BULLSHIT. I mindlessly surrendered my perfectly salvageble human existence to feed that goddamn wall... and for WHAT? Was the thing in the wall even real?! I mean...I KNOW it was, but, was it always there-- waiting for the right pawn and I just happened to stumble upon it at the worst time or did it simply manifest from my own insanity?"

Squee "I...I have no idea... Is it really gone, you think?"

Nny "Yes......that's a different darkness. It's beautiful, isn't it? Merciful...peaceful... inviting...

I know I should accept the end. I should embrace the nothing, but that means the only legacy I leave behind in this already fucked up world is...*sobs silently*

Squee "Nny, --"

Nny "DON'T you fucking say it, Squee."

Squee "It's nice out. the stars are pretty bright tonight for once. Come with me. Pepito only lives a few blocks away..."