#and they’re always going to the temple and listening to Good songs

[myexmosafespace]

I don’t mind if people are religious. They can believe what they want. But WHY must they make it their entire personality?!

[i520u]

⌕ dates with riize 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

hello briize hello riize lovers i’m one of you please keep the requests coming

PAIRING riize x gn!reader (not proofread!)

TAGS sfw, fluff, headcanons

OSAKI SHOTARO ༄

literally all sunshines and rainbows throughout the rest of the relationship

if you get into an argument with him that has GOT to be your fault idk what to tell you

i feel like he’s the type of boyfriend to teach you how to drive

and when you hit the curb he’s like “that’s okay! we can try again when i fix the car!”

but at the same time he’s gripping that roof handle in the car for dear life but he’s just too sweet to tell you that your driving’s horrible

he never lets you drive again btw

HE’D FILM SOOO MANY DANCE TIKTOKS WITH YOU!!!

also i feel like instead of a gf effect, it’s the opposite with him because he gives you the bf effect

your entire fashion style is gonna change for sure like have you seen this man? that is a man of AESTHETICS

would be so enthusiastic with teaching you all the tiktok dance steps

and none of these tiktoks are cringe they’re actually those cool ones

the type to hug you at the end of the tiktok video or kiss the temple of your head idk…

i imagine his ideal dates might be cafe hopping/cafe hunting all across tokyo or just shopping around shibuya

takes you to one of those claw machines while you’re shopping and he’ll try winning you a random plushie of an anime that neither of you watch

so now you have a random plush of like… some dude from haikyuu

would pay for your drinks btw (coffee, milk tea, matcha)

SONG EUNSEOK ༄

OK LISTEN.

cake decorating

he just looks like he’d enjoy doing that like did you see how proud he was wearing that hello kitty hairclip

please this man is gonna hear you suggest it and he’s like “LET’S GO!!”

craziest part is that he’s gonna eat you up at decorating it too

you’ll see him make a cute flower on his cake using the cream and you’re like “how did you do that :( how dare you be better than me :(”

and he’s gonna giggle nervously and his face is gonna turn a light shade of red while he helped you out

“i’m not better than you, we’re equally good.” and then he compares your cakes together and the only reason why yours looks ok is because he helped you for the most part

if you genuinely feel a little gloomy that yours looked bad he would purposely mess up on the rest of his cake

because eunseok will never be caught dead leaving his beloved partner unhappy, no matter how small the issue might be

i feel like he would notice those little shift of emotions that you have that even you barely notice

and he’d do his best to cheer you up because you’re just his everything </3

after the cakes are done he takes 282629 pictures of you and your cake and then he’d probably say things like “keep posing, you’re so pretty”

i think most of his dates would involve domestic things like that

if you don’t live together he’d crash to your house, help you deep clean the entire house and he considers that a date too

a little bit more low maintenance when it comes to relationships if that makes sense

also i think he’s not very clingy but he LOVESSS a clingy partner even if he doesn’t verbally say or show it

he’s always have a light blush on his face whenever you just cling on him

so please cling onto him as much as possible

JUNG SUNGCHAN ༄

just a feeling… but

gym dates 😭

and he’s so cheesy about it okay like at first you’re reluctant because the thought of going to a gym scares you

but then the first time you go there and he’s like so touchy with you in a good way

purposely standing so close to you while he helps you out with the equipments

maybe at one point he’s even like “yeah just do it like that.” while helping you out with the weights and then giving you a kiss on the cheek

which catches you off guard you almost dropped the weights but he was holding it with you so you’re good

when you blush he would let out a flustered giggle and won’t comment on it

and then you make it even worse by saying something like “i’m just flushed from the workout” and he’s like “sure babe”

would always be close to you just in case you’re caught underneath the weight and you can’t lift it up anymore

at the end of the date you’re like “i can’t move my legs” and then he just carries you

takes you out to eat something sweet afterwards

he’s going to be all smiley the whole time too

at the end he’s like “didn’t i tell you it would be fun? do you wanna go to the gym with me again next week?”

if you say no he’s not gonna sulk and punch the wall or something he’s just gonna be like “aww that’s alright too.” and then kiss your head

then he would say something like “you were incredible on your first try though, i’m proud of you.”

clenches fist i want him so bad…

PARK WONBIN ༄

i swear wonbin’s a little weird

like have you seen his tiktoks… something’s strange about that man

i think he stated before that he loves shopping so you KNOW what that means

always send you vids he sees on the internet about some new shop opening up in hongdae or something and he’s like “let’s go bae”

sends you the weirdest tiktoks and is like “you”

and then you’re like “wonbin what”

and he won’t elaborate

sends you his fit checks

if you don’t approve he will actually sulk i’m not kidding

sometimes when he’s bored he’d write a song for you

like not a singing song but a musical one from his guitar if that makes sense

he loves matching with you. matching earrings, matching clothes, matching beanies.

ohh i feel like he’d also do those cute couple videos on tiktok like you know he would slow dance with you in the snow and post it for everyone to see this man LOVES soft launching you

his soft launches are also by no means him trying to hide you or keep you a secret, it’s more like… he just likes to have a mysterious vibe to his online person 😍

also i think he loves leaving kisses on your neck whenever you snuggle up to watch a movie or something

like you’re talking to him while you’re on his lap and he’s just like “mhm, and then what?” and then he gives you kisses down your jaw and neck

he’s all over you PLEASE no matter in public or private and it’s even worse (or better 😜) in private too

HONG SEUNGHAN ༄

definitely a gamer bf

dates with him involves him going out to see the sun for the first time that week ❤️

i’m just kidding but your dates probably involves a lot of going out because you feel like this man NEEDS to get some sunlight

also one of the guys that enjoys PDA

he wins the idgaf war he would kiss you at any point of time if he suddenly feels like it

you can just be talking like straight up gossiping about something that happened between your aunt and a scammer and he would just…

he would just grabbed the sides of your face and plant the deepest kiss ever

and then you’re all flustered and he would burst into laughter

he’s the biggest flirt ever he has this one stare that would leave you WEAK in the knees

definitely has a habit of staring at your lips when you talk which makes you SOOO nervous

plays with your hands or hair while you talk

just a thought but he’d definitely run his thumb over your lower lip after he kissed it WOAH

calls you with the most generic pet names but god it makes you run LAPS

also when you come over his house he’d make you pull for him on that FIFA game idk how the game works but i hope you get what i’m trying to say

LEE SOHEE ༄

AH i feel like him as a bf is so fun

he looks like so much fun from the instagram/tiktok posts tbh

the most normal boyfriend ever help idk how to explain it

sends you pictures of him at work with captions like “fighting my hardest battle (i’m at the work i willingly applied for)

various dates

he doesn’t always suggest ideas for dates but he goes ALL out for you when you suggest them

you want to watch the sunset? best believe he’ll take you to the prettiest beach he could find for you to enjoy

you want to have a movie date? he’s gonna set up the projector at his house HIMSELF

i don’t think he’s very keen on kissing in public but he has no problem holding you close to him

holds your hand, holds you by your waist, EVERYTHING

takes 0.5x pictures of you from your forehead

he has a picture of the two of you completing a heart drawn on your cheeks as his lockscreen

always yapping about you like

“my lover made me this lunch”

“my lover gave me this for my birthday”

“my lover tied my tie for me today”

his favourite type of dates are karaoke dates sorry like this man is beyonce’s son he’s GOING to use that godsent vocals of his

also i feel like anniversary celebrations are so grand with him his love for you is so genuine he wants to give you the world and more

i want him so bad… he’s my goat

ANTON LEE ༄

dates are SOPHISTICATED

he’s bred in BOSTON you know he goes crazy with that shit

make you dress up fancy in silk and satin and stuff everyone once in a while to take you to a fine dining i’m so serious

takes you on concert dates too

like… mitski or laufey or niki zenfaya concert dates

he would lift you up on his shoulders during these concerts so you would see clearly

also likes backhugging you

he’s so soft spoken so you don’t have the heart to ever start any arguments with him

when he was a swimmer he’d give you those vip pass or something (idk how dating an athlete works oops)

after his competition finish and he’s still wet from the water and its just covered by his towel and swim attire, he would go up to you with a flushed face and would ask you if he looked cool or not

i think he’s the type to enjoy talking to you most of the time during dates or just like an everyday occurrence

like he loves staring into your eyes as you speak he loves you so much but he’s too shy to tell you that so often

he’s not the type to just blurt out “i love you” but you can just tell that his feelings for you are true from the way he stares at you

would let you decorate his hair with your hairclips and would wear them out for the rest of the day

he’s soooo smitten by you it’s crazy

[vinylfoxbooks]

25 Days of Jegumas | Day 1 | Day 7 December 8 - Holiday Music | @noblehouseofgay | wc: 657

“We’re home,” Regulus hums, walking into the room with his son in his arms. James doesn’t respond verbally, but there are some sounds coming from the living room, and words that he can’t quite decipher.

There are a myriad of things that Regulus can walk in on with his partner, and most things he has seen already. So he’s not shocked when, of all things, he walks into the living room and James is playing Christmas music loud enough to not be heard from the entryway, but absolutely loud enough for James to be nearly belting too -- which makes sense what he was hearing upon walking into the house. They’re dancing around with a broom, singing into the end of it and twirling around the living room. 

He watches them for a while, smiling gently at their partner’s antics fondly, before he clears his throat to make himself known. James pauses in the middle of their dramatic rendition of White Winter Hymnal to whip themself around to see him, grinning brightly, “Hello the my favourite people in the world.” They do a funny little shimmy dance towards them, bringing their arms to wrap around Regulus’ waist, “My love, light of my life, my star.” They kiss him softly, pulling back and pressing a kiss to a very sleepy Harry’s head, “My world, my baby.” And they bring one of their hands to push little curls out of the way so they can kiss his temple. 

Regulus laughs softly, “You’re in a good mood.” 

They grin, “Christmas music always gets me in a good mood, my love. Was the playdate good?” 

Regulus nods, “Draco is definitely more haughty than Harry, but they warmed up to each other well.” 

“That’s good,” they smile, “It’s been so long since the last time they’ve seen each other. How was Narcissa?” 

“She’s doing well, I can’t tell what’s going on with Lucius, but that’s not my business.” 

They hum, “I see that it tuckered the boy out.” 

Regulus nods, “Mhm, I’m not sure if we should let him nap though, since it’s so close to bedtime.” 

James nods and gently runs their fingers over the little boy’s brow, “We can figure it out. Did you have fun, Haz?” Harry gently nods, eyes lidded with sleep, “Well, we don’t want you going to sleep right now…” they think for a moment before humming, “Do you two want to dance with me?” 

Regulus rolls his eyes but nods, and James moves to his side, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him into the center of the living room just as the song switches. Deck the Halls. Where James starts bouncing around and singing loudly, Regulus just bounces a bit, singing as well and trying to keep Harry as awake as possible.

They go through songs like that: You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch, Here Comes Santa Claus, Joy to the World, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, Up On the Housetop, the list goes on. And eventually Harry begins to perk up, squirming to get out of his dad’s arms and be let down so he can dance as well with the two. They take a break to eat some of the leftovers that Effie left when she came to visit earlier in the day and go back to their listening to music, though they all settle down with a board game that Harry can play.

And when the boy is in bed, after passing out as soon as his head hits the pillow, James and Regulus settle on their couch, the fire roaring. James has turned down their music and switched to the softer Christmas music, playing it low enough that they can hear it but loud enough that it can fill the silence between them. 

“You and your little obsession with Christmas music is something special…”

“Hey, it helped keep our son awake, didn’t it?” They push him with their shoulder.

Day 9

[vilf-lover]

i’m not one of those cool fanfic writers so don’t expect greatness and i’m idk how to make a title and fancy specifications but

this is how i imagine darlin getting everyone kicked out of the club because of them fighting went down ⭐️

gn!darlin

1400 words 😭😭😭 certified yapper

“I LOVE THIS SONG!!” angel shouted into darlin’s ear while an intense edm rendition of ‘baby’ by justin bieber roared from every crevice of the club

they were wondering if anyone was going to be able to hear after tonight, but they didn’t care because of how much fun they were having. though, they were questioning angel’s taste in music…

“OKAY I AM GOING TO GO GET A WATER AND GO SIT DOWN WITH MR PARTY POOPER OVER THERE” obviously darlin was referring to their wonderful mate that just happened to come to the club again- even after last time ;))

he claimed he came again for safety reasons but they knew it’s because he had a blast, even before their “dance lesson”. sam may not be a dancer, but he always talks about how music makes him feel truly alive, how he felt when he was human. a reminder of his livelihood.

darlin ends up sitting next to their mate the rest of their night as they both enjoy shirley temples and nice cold waters.

as the night grows older, the pack decides they’ll stay for 30 more minutes before leaving.

about five minutes before they plan to leave-“darlin’ i’m gonna use the restroom before we head out. don’t get in any trouble without me.” he chuckles as he jostles out of his seat and makes his way to the back.

about a minute passes before a man, about 6’0, shoulder-length hair, one full sleeve of tattoos sits on the chair next to them; in the seat sam was occupying.

“so gorgeous, you leaving here with that guy? because i know something that would make you much happier” he smiles smugly as the words leave his lips

they’re a bit taken aback. while this was not their first rodeo, no cowboy pun intended, they now felt way different when being hit on. as though it was an insult to them and sam.

“oh really.” they say in such an unenthused tone that most people would stand up and walk away right then and there.

it seems as though he takes this as a challenge. “yeah hun, i’m sure i could treat you better than he could. tenfold. how about i prove it?” you can hear the smirk on his face.

this is when darlin’ decides to stop being civil. there is nothing they hate more than a person that won’t take no for an answer. they would know after being in a relationship with one for way too long. boundaries are boundaries.

“listen. i am trying to give you the chance to leave this conversation right now. rejection is hard, i know. i’m sure you’re horny and lonely, but i’m not. so leave me alone.” they scoff and turn their chair back to the bar

“well didn’t know you were such a fucking bitch who didn’t know how to have fun but whatever” he starts mumbling to himself as he walks off, head hanging low

sam appears in the crowd of people, making his way back to his seat. “phew- sorry, the line was so long. how’re you doin’ darlin?”

“well- other than a guy poorly hitting on me, i’m doing okay” they scoff thinking about the interaction

sam is puzzled. “who did what? i left for like two minutes and you’re being ambushed. what am i going to do with such a fine specimen of a mate”

he leans in for a kiss as they both laugh and get up from their seats to meet everyone at the front

darlin and sam are walking out of the club with ash, milo, david and their mates when they hear something behind them

an agitated voice yells at the group, “oh so you have a little posse. and there’s your little boyfriend too. cute.”

confused, they all give glances to each other before darlin’ says to just keep looking forward and walk.

soon it would become obvious that this was not the end of the interaction.

“ignoring me? it’s good to know they’re all fucking bitches! just like you!” the man slurring his words and getting progressively louder as his sentences drag on

darlin’, upset, turns around and approaches the man while still keeping a good five feet of distance to try and maintain some civility. “can you leave me and my friends alone. you are obviously tipsy so i’m giving you this last warning”

they go to turn around before getting kicked in the stomach

“i’m not scared of you or your little friends! and i won’t take a pathetic ass threat!” he says, now screaming.

everyone is in shock- a person they don’t know is now attempting to hurt the person they all know won’t take shit.

“holy shit!” milo gasps, possibly for dramatic effect

david sighs while rubbing his temples, “this is not going to end well for him”

darlin is now standing up after falling into the ground, brushing the rubble off of their hands. there’s an annoyed look on their face as they walk over to sam. “i really did not want to do this tonight but can you take my bag and my rings?”

the man is standing there distraught, wondering why they are acting so leisurely after getting kicked.

darlin’ gives sam a kiss on the cheek and looks at the pack, “enjoy the show, i guess” they roll their eyes before turning back to the man

“what the fuck do you think you’re doing, you think this is some kind of jo-“ he tries to mutter a sentence, before getting punched square in the face

usually, darlin likes making fighting a game. something they can drag out and feel some adrenaline before ending it. but tonight? no, not tonight.

the man looks up, his nose is bleeding immensely. he looks terrified, skittering back on his feet and hands as darlin’ approaches them.

darlin’ is now towering over him, the dim illumination of a streetlight overhead creates a silhouette of their figure thats spine-chilling, they look menacing as ever

“i’ll let you stand up once.” they say under their breath, “give you some dignity. so it won’t be so embarrassing to remember tomorrow.”

they walk back as he very slowly gets up

the man laughs, “giving pity? not a good idea. i can destroy you hun. i just wasn’t prepared.”

he goes to throw a right jab after swinging his left leg in between their feet to knock them over.

in theory, it’s a good idea. make them unstable then hit them when they’re not excepting it. unfortunately for him- that’s not how it went…

darlin is not affected by the leg, and instead squeezes his leg in between their feet. making him stuck- falling directly on his side. a painful landing to say the least

as the pack is watching, they’re also making full commentary. not loud enough for them to hear, as that would be a detrimental mistake.

“do you think they’re going easy?” david asks

“oh absolutely” sam chuckles, “this is nothin’”

asher laughs, “yeah i think they’ve thrown a punch harder than that at me!”

the man is now in fetal position on his left side, wincing in pain.

darlin’ leans down to a crouch, frightenly close, and whispers, “next time, know. no means fucking no. don’t do this ever again. prick.”

the emphasis of their words would’ve been enough to make him topple over in the first place

he does nothing but nod as they walk off.

with impeccable timing, the security guard from the back of the club walks up to the group.

“i’ve been asked to escort you and your party off of the premises.” the man had a deep voice and is quite taller than anyone in the group.

darlin’ chuckles, “are you joking? i mean- this dude was harassing me and then my “party” this whole time and you didn’t feel the need to interject.”

the guard seems to give a glance that says “yeah, i know. i’m just doing my job” which everyone in that group has given before.

“okay. we were just leaving anyway. thanks sir, have a good night” david seems to be the only peaceful one at the moment. at most moments actually.

there’s silence in the pack as they continue walking away from the club until a overly-enthusiastic “wow! that was awesome!” spouts from asher

i am not a fic writer to say the least but i have a very active imagination and i hope this lives up to standard in one way or another

@rarelyisa

@infinitelovewithoutfulfillment

@aimedis

i hope you guys enjoy :>>

[embrosegraves]

𝕀 𝔾𝕦𝕖𝕤𝕤 𝕀'𝕞 𝕀𝕟 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖

Pierre Gasly x Fem!Reader You ever get a fic idea that just.. refuses, to leave your brain until you get it done?? yeah that's what this is

Warnings: None :D maybe some spelling and grammar errors, google translated French

Love was different for everyone. It means something different for each different person. Everyone has their own version of love, whether they’re aware of it or not. Everyone displays love differently. For some, love is about spending time with those around them. For others, love is giving things to show the intensity of their affection. There are many ways that people show their love for the people around them and Pierre Gasly is no stranger to many of them. 

When Pierre Gasly approached you with the intent to start dating you, you had made it clear that you believed there was no limit to show how you loved. So he formed a plan. For every date, he would bring you a gift. Showing you his budding love with material objects. Alongside the gifts he would give you a note, telling you how much his love was growing. For every holiday, Pierre would make sure to prioritise his time with you. Whenever he could, he would make sure that he was doing everything for you. His favourite way to show his love for you was taking you by the hand and giving a kiss to your temple at every chance he got. 

Pierre made it obvious with every chance he had, that he was head over heels in love with you. And while you could not match him gift-for-gift, you could do one thing that he couldn’t. You had decided a while ago, even before dating Pierre, that along with modelling you would start dabbling in music. You had grown up playing the piano, as many of your following already knew, but not many knew that you had also taken vocal lessons as a child. Pierre was also no stranger to your piano playing abilities. Often coming home from a race weekend to hear the soft sounds of the piano in your large living room. 

The thing about Pierre is that while he was a very attentive boyfriend, he wasn’t always the sharpest tool in the shed. It was this fact that let you practise and compose the piano melody for his gift even if he was in the room with you. He would sit and listen to you play and figure out what notes worked and what notes didn’t, complementing your playing all the while. The part that was trickiest when making the song, was finding the time to rent out a studio space so you could record the vocal tracks. As much as you could between photoshoots and brand promotions on your socials, you usually planned for your studio time to be when Pierre was at a race that you couldn’t attend. On such occasions you would bring along your mother (if she had the time) or Pierre’s mother. 

It was always special (and important) to spend time with Pascale. As much as Pierre joked that his mother was stealing his girlfriend, you never turned down an opportunity to be around the woman. She was one of the most comforting people you could be around. So it felt incredibly special for her to come with you as you poured your entire soul into showing how much you loved her youngest son. It was also your way of reassuring her that he was in good hands and that she could rest easy knowing her baby boy was being looked after. After all, if you had a son you’d want the same reassurance. 

It took everything in you to not show her the full song once it was completed. You wanted Pierre to be the very first person who heard the song in its entirety. You also weren’t sure when exactly to show him. It was by pure coincidence that you completed the song two days before your 3rd anniversary. It would be the perfect time to show him. You brainstormed ways to show him the song until you finally decided that you were going to compile a video of clips that showed your relationship with Pierre. 

Pierre would get home the night before so really you only had tomorrow and the morning after to make sure it was done. You were a little pressed for time but you were determined to have it ready for your anniversary. When you woke up in the morning you spent hours going through all the videos you had and picking out the ones you wanted to use. Taking a break to have some lunch and make yourself a hot drink about halfway through the day, you soon started to organise and arrange the videos to be exactly how you wanted them. After dinner you spent your time making sure the whole thing would last the duration of the song. Before calling it a night and going to bed. 

The next morning, you were quick to get out of bed and make a coffee, knowing that today was your last day to work on Pierre’s gift. Booting up your computer, hot coffee on the desk, you opened the editing software and got to work. You were glad that you had done the majority of the editing the night before as you only had to make a few last minute adjustments. To tie it all off, you added the audio file to play over the video. Not wanting to waste a minute of your day, you quickly saved the finished product and started to tidy up the apartment. On the rare occasion that Pierre would be home without you, he always made sure the apartment was clean for you, so it was only fair that you maintained that cleanliness as much as you could while he was away. Plus it was always nice to come home to a clean space. 

Getting into bed that night, you were almost too jittery to fall asleep. Too excited for the day to come. Eventually however your mind and body became too exhausted to stay awake and you fell into a blissful sleep. Only slightly stirring when Pierre quietly climbed into bed beside you. Still asleep, you snuggled closer to him and slept soundly until morning. Pierre’s arms around you, face nuzzled into your hair. 

It was Pierre who woke up first the next morning, just as he’d planned. Every big event, Pierre was determined to serve you your breakfast while you relaxed in bed. He went full out as he always did with these things. He made you a full breakfast, a perfectly made coffee and a thornless rose with a sweet note and arranged them all neatly on a tray. He carefully carried the tray to the bedroom just in time to see you sitting up and stretching your arms above your head. 

“Bonjour Chérie.” His voice was soft as he knew that loud noises in the morning often irritated you. He placed the tray on your lap and moved to sit down in front of you. “How are you this morning?” 

“Hello Darling.” Barely a whisper, you answered him. “I’m doing perfectly today.” 

Pierre leaned in and gave you a kiss. “Joyeux anniversaire, Mon Amour.” He gave you another kiss. 

“I have something to show you later.” You said after drinking some of your coffee. “A gift for you.” 

“You are my gift.” 

“I can’t exactly put myself in a box and gift wrap it, can I?”

He laughed. “No, but I wouldn’t be surprised if you tried.” 

You spent the morning with Pierre. Talking with each other, laughing and catching up on any gossip either of you might’ve missed. This was your favourite way to spend time with him. Comfortable, at home and just being the best friends a pair of lovers could be. At around lunch time, you had finally managed enough courage to give Pierre the gift you made. 

“Mon Amour?” You were sitting at the kitchen island, watching as Pierre finished the dishes he insisted he did. 

“Hmm?” He turned the water off and turned to face you. 

“I still have something to give you.” You said. 

His face lit up with a loving smile. “You didn’t have to buy me anything, Chérie.” 

You shook your head, “I didn’t buy anything, I made something. And I did it because I wanted to.” 

You stood up and gestured for him to follow you to your shared office. Confused but curious, he wiped his hands dry and began to follow you. You told him to sit down while you dragged a chair to sit next to him. Turning the computer on, you navigated until you found the video file you were looking for. 

“You just have to double click on this one.” you said, pointing to the file labelled ‘pour-mon-amour.mov’. 

Excited at the idea that you had made a video, Pierre eagerly did as instructed. You were a little nervous about how he would react. You hadn’t ever done something like this before. 

The video started with a clip of you recording yourself while at the beach. In the clip, Pierre had come up behind you and lifted you into the air. You laughed out in surprise as Pierre had spun you around in circles. The piano had started playing and soon after, Pierre heard your voice singing. 

“Oh I’m obsessed.  With the way your head is laying on my chest. How you love the things I hate about myself.  And no one knows, but with you, I see hope again.” 

The next clip to appear was a video that Charles had sent you. He had recorded Pierre’s reaction to you showing up in the paddock after you had previously told him you wouldn’t be able to make it. Pierre had stopped in the middle of his sentence and started running to you. He had engulfed you in a hug and started rocking the both of you side to side. Squeezing you tightly, he had started speaking in French, telling you exactly how much he loved you. 

“When I overthink the little things in my head You seem to always help me catch my breath But then I lose it again When I look at you, that's the end.”

Now the video showed a montage of clips. Small videos of Pierre giving you a kiss on the cheek or spinning you around like a princess. Pierre helping you tie your hair up. A video of you beating Pierre in a game while he just smiled at you. Even a video that Yuki had taken of Pierre laying on his back with you laying on top of him. The two of you just gazing at each other. 

“And why do I get so nervous when I look into your eyes? Butterflies can't stop me fallin' for you

And darlin', this is more than anything I felt before You're everything that I want, but I didn't think I'd find Someone who is worth the wait of all the years of my heartbreak But I know now I found the one I love.” 

A video of you dragging Pierre to the middle of your open living room to start dancing with each other. He spun you under his arm and then pulled you in closed to start swaying with you cuddled close. Your arms had wrapped around his waist, your chin resting on his chest before you stood on your tiptoes to give him a kiss. 

The video continued to show bits and pieces of your entire relationship with Pierre. You were incredibly nervous to look at Pierre as he watched. You could bring yourself to look at the way his eyes were glued to the screen or look at the way his mouth was hung open in disbelief at the whole thing. You had looked firmly at your hands and played with the bracelet that Pierre had given you just that morning. 

You hadn’t even noticed that the video and song had stopped until Pierre took your hands in his. You looked up and saw his eyes closed as he brought both your hands to place a deep, lingering kiss to your knuckles. 

“Did you like it?” You asked timidly after clearing your throat. 

Opening his eyes, Pierre quickly and urgently brought your lips to his. His kiss was almost feverish, as if he was trying his damned best to pour every ounce of love he had for you into it. It took your breath away. As the kiss became more gentle, you both slowly pulled apart. 

Catching your breath you looked at Pierre. His eyes bore straight into yours as he whispered. “Je ne peux pas expliquer exactement combien je t'aime. Je ne pourrai jamais assez vous remercier pour cela.” [I can not explain exactly how much I love you. I will never be able to thank you enough for this.]

You wiped the stray tear that had fallen from his eyes. “Joyeux anniversaire, ma chérie.”

I'm literally so in love with this, I'm getting jealous of the fake romances I write lmao

This has been rattling around in my brain for so fucking long you guys have no idea. If you couldn't tell, the song is I GUESS I'M IN LOVE by Clinton Kane.

Likes, replies and reblogs are always welcome <3

[tisayemate]

The Life I Never Led

Obi Wan Kenobi x Padawan!Reader

Fluff, comfy cozy comfort 🥰

Summary: Obi-Wan begins to notice the quiet weight his Padawan carries, and in his own way, makes sure she doesn’t carry it alone.

Inspired by:

AN: I just auditioned for a role in a play using this song and I’ve just been so obsessed with it! Please, please go watch Sister Act if you haven’t or even just listen to the soundtrack because it’s so damn good 😭 I was inspired by this song and thought, hey. Why not write something based on this? Anyways, please enjoy.

Story under the cut

Obi-Wan had never been one to eavesdrop. It was unseemly, unbecoming of a Jedi Master.

And yet, as he passed by her quarters that evening, he found himself pausing just outside the door, breath held.

Because she was singing.

Not humming absentmindedly, not muttering a tune under her breath, but singing.

“I’ve never talked back, I’ve never slept late…”

It was soft, almost hesitant, as if she weren’t quite used to letting her voice carry. But it did. And it was full of something else, something he rarely ever saw in her.

“I’ve never sat down when told to stand straight…”

Longing.

“I’ve never let go and gone with the flow, and don’t even know really why…”

His fingers curled slightly at his sides. Force.

Obi-Wan had always known she carried… something. Not anger. Not defiance. But a distance—a quiet resistance that never quite settled. She trained, she listened, she fought when she had to, but she did not believe in the way Jedi were supposed to.

“I’ve never asked questions or taken a dare…”

That was untrue. She asked questions all the time.

Just never the ones that mattered.

“I’ve never rebelled or stood up and yelled, or even just held my head high…”

His jaw tightened. She did hold her head high, even if she thought she didn’t.

“And all of the feelings unspoken, all of the truths unsaid, they’re all I have left of the life I never led…”

Obi-Wan exhaled quietly. So that’s what this is.

He had suspected, of course. It was hard not to. The way she lingered when the Temple doors opened to the bustling city beyond. The way she watched non-Jedi with something unreadable in her gaze. The way she trained—not for peace, not for duty, but because she had been given no other choice.

And the way she never spoke of it.

He could have stepped inside. Could have said something.

But no. This was hers. A moment she hadn’t meant for anyone to hear.

So, silently, Obi-Wan turned and walked away.

The next day, he watched her.

Not openly, not in any way she would notice, but watched nonetheless. The way she fought during sparring. The way she moved—sharp, disciplined, but always holding something back.

Not her skill. Not her strength.

Something deeper.

The match ended with a sharp clang as their sabers locked. She was breathing heavily, strands of hair falling loose from where she had tied them back. But there was no fire in her eyes, no satisfaction in the fight.

There never was.

He deactivated his saber first. “You never fight for the sake of victory.”

She blinked at him, still catching her breath. “What?”

Obi-Wan tilted his head slightly. “Other Padawans fight to win. To test their limits, to sharpen their form. But you—” He studied her, watching as she stiffened under his scrutiny. “You fight because you feel you must.”

Her grip tightened around the hilt of her saber. “…Isn’t that what Jedi are supposed to do?”

Obi-Wan hummed, expression unreadable. “Perhaps.”

She shifted uncomfortably. “Is this another lecture?”

He let out a quiet breath, then, in a tone far softer than she expected—“I heard you.”

That made her freeze.

Her eyes darted up to his, cautious, searching. “Heard me what?”

He didn’t answer immediately. Just looked at her, gaze steady, unwavering. Then, finally—

“Singing.”

She inhaled sharply. “Oh.”

Silence stretched between them.

She dropped her gaze, fingers fiddling with the edge of her sleeve. “You weren’t supposed to.”

“No,” he agreed. “But I did.”

She pressed her lips together, shifting her weight. “It was just a song.”

Obi-Wan stepped forward slightly, voice quiet. “Was it?”

Her breath hitched.

He saw it then—that flicker of hesitation, that warring battle behind her eyes. The part of her that wanted to say something, that wanted to let it spill free, but held it back as she alwaysdid.

So he made the choice for her.

Without warning, he reached forward and pulled her into his arms.

She sucked in a breath, body going rigid. “M—Master—”

“Shh,” he murmured. His grip was firm, grounding. Not a gentle pat-on-the-back hug, not an awkward one-armed embrace, but solid. Steady.

She didn’t move at first. Didn’t react. Then, slowly, something in her posture unwound. Her hands gripped at the fabric of his robes—not clutching, not clinging, but holding.

For the first time, Obi-Wan felt her breathe.

They stood like that for a moment.

Then—

“I thought you weren’t a hugger,” he mused, voice tinged with dry amusement.

She let out something between a scoff and a weak laugh, muffled against his shoulder. “I hate you.”

“Mm.” He smirked. “Sure you do.”

She didn’t pull away.

And he didn’t let go.

[ocean-armin]

THUNDER

Armin x Reader

Synopsis: Armin and reader attend an Ambassadors gala together after the war, inspired by…ANOTHER Lana song :)

Tags: armin arlert x reader, post-canon, post final season/ch 139, alluding to death, shameless fluff, fem!reader if you squint (mentions of being his ‘wife’), language warning?

enjoy <3 glad to be back!

When someone says that ‘they’ll only be a minute’, do they ever really mean it?

From what you’ve experienced, the answer is no. After the Rumbling, remaining society has subscribed to thinking that they have all of the time in the world. Whether it be lingering too long in the grocery line, or goodbyes that entail chatting in the doorway when all you want to do is shut the door. Time is no longer a luxury.

You wish it was. You and Armin were supposed to have left the Ambassadors’ gala about thirty minutes ago. Armin told you that he’d only be a minute, as he had to wish everyone a formal goodbye. Placing a soft kiss to your temple and a squeeze to your hip, he rushed back to the group of other ambassadors to shake their hands. You were dismissed from your duty of ‘Commander’s Wife’ for the night; and were left to observe the long winded formalities of politicians and world-leaders, when they could just say ‘goodbye’ instead.

Now, you’ve found yourself against the doorway with your heels in hand, still nursing a glass of champagne. If there’s anything you’ve gotten good at as a commander’s wife, it’s observing your husband.

How could you not observe him? Armin Arlert has always known how to light up a room. You watch the familiar way in which his bright eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles, golden strands of hair cascading into his eyes as he laughs. His cheeks still rosy with liquor, you smile to yourself. Such a lightweight. How lucky you were to call a man touched by Midas your own.

Armin’s ability to flip a switch in order to charm became evident at a young age, when you both served time in the Survey Corps. Even as a young commander, his charisma and implied innocence allowed for strategies of manipulation to come easy to him. Now, as his wife, you could distinguish this strategy from a mile away. You knew he was forcing his allure.

“Goodnight everyone, I’ll see you again at the leadership summit. Have a wonderful spring,” Armin beamed, offering firm handshakes and a final wave before he finally strode over to the doorway.

“Ready to go?” You asked, knowingly, placing your empty glass on a table. You stepped closer to loosen his tie, he nodded in response.

“More than ever,” Armin quietly murmured, taking your heels from your hands, and placing a firm hand on your lower back in return.

****

The crisp cut of the rain plummeted onto your skin as you two stepped outside, the chill aiding you to cut through Armin’s facade.

“…I know you were upset back there,” you mentioned quietly, taking his hand in yours as you walked.

“God, I thought I was better at masking it,” he groaned, giving your hand a squeeze.

“You’re pretty damn convincing, but not to me. You know that.” You smiled wearily at him.

“I know…those people are just…” he inhaled sharply, “so ridiculous.” His anger became apparent, clearing his throat as his voice wavered. “God, as much as they talk of peace and how ‘lucky’ they are, they’ll never really know, will they? They’ll never know what we went through. To lose so many people…to lose our families, to lose him.” Armin stammered.

You stopped your forward pace, standing on the cobblestone sidewalk in front of Armin to properly listen.

“They don’t, and they’ll never understand. It’s hard to watch you be so nice to them…but you’re always good at it,” you said softly, squeezing his hand in yours.

“Even worse, they’re all so fucking old! I’ve been a commander and politician since I was nineteen, fighting since fifteen! These people have been comfortable their whole lives, and they act like they’ve suffered? I’m just so fed up with being so jovial with them,” Armin’s voice cracked, wiping his eyes with the hand holding your heels.

“You don’t always have to be nice to them, Armin. They should know what you went through. For fuck’s sake, you’re a commander and ambassador at twenty-two. You shouldn’t have to be,” you hugged him. “I know it’s hard, I know I’m not the one to tell you that it’s easy to do, either. But respect and kindness aren’t the same.”

Armin’s back shook, body racking with sobs as he hugged back tightly.

“I miss him too. God, I can’t believe that people are so privileged to not experience what we have. But god, I’m the luckiest, so lucky for both of us to be alive. To love you, and to be your wife,” your voice cracked with tears. “To be able to see you actually happy, and not just the ‘Commander Arlert’ charm. To be with the real you tonight. All dressed up…sopping wet.”

Armin chuckled, hiccuping through his tears, pulling away to look at you.

“I love you, so so much. And I’m freezing out here…” he laughed, wiping his eyes.

“I love you too. Let’s go dry off, warm up a little. No more wasted time tonight,” you reach to cup his cheek, rubbing your thumb along it.

“No time with you is wasted.”

****

You act like fucking Mr. Brightside when you're with all your friends,

But I know what you're like when the party ends . . .

You roll like thunder, pouring all your drinks

The party's lit and you, my friend, half-cut when it begins

You roll like thunder, you're tryna catch that wind

That lightning in the bottle, that moonbeam in your hand

And you try to see the bright side when each new day begins,

But you're not satisfied at the rainbows end.

[not-a-matopoeia]

HEAD CANNON HILLS I PERSONALLY CHOOSE TO DIE ON:

Fight me (lol)

Bruce Wayne

Gray Hairs are mostly in and around his temples and beard- also he won’t dye it

Asexual but not sex repulsed (it just feels right)

Definitely experienced with makeup, sure to cover bruises and stuff but also he definitely had a phase where he wore eyeliner cause why not

Autistic

Dick Grayson

Crooked nose

Speaks some Roma still but has forgotten most of it, which makes him upset

People deffo thought he was gay all through school, and they weren’t wrong…or right (he’s some form of queer)

Gymnastics teacher as a side job

ADHD

Oldest Daughter SyndromeTM

Jason Todd

I think that Jason runs a book club with a bunch of middle aged women, and they talk about classic lit

Theater Kid (gay)

Good with kids, reluctantly

Has freckles

Hair is caused by Marie Antoinette syndrome

Struggled with body dysmorphia after being revived

Keeps all his receipts (they’re in a box in the kitchen) and is stingy with money

Tim Drake

Wears a Medical Identification bracelet for the spleen thing (it’s recommended guys I looked it up cause I’m normal)

Has acne

Chased Batman and Robin around with that damn camera (I fucking love this)

Has anxiety

Bisexual (not a HC but I thought I’d mention it)

Would eat the coffee grounds

Listens to video game osts

(Bring the skateboard back)

Damian

Strong nose

Just very strong features generally

Giggles, or full on cackles but there’s no In between

I think it’s be cute if he became an art therapist or a vet

Autistic

Cass

Cuts her own bangs, they look horrible<3

Lesbian

Tired to dye her hair once (with Steph and Babs)never again

Steph

Grew up in crime ally (idk where she lived so I choose to believe this- this could also be the truth, again I cannot remember rn)

Freckles

Butterfly Clips

Bisexual

Curly hair

Alfred

Had chased multiple people off of Wayne Manors premises with his shotgun ‘

Got second place in a chili cook off one time and still hasn’t recovered

Extra:

Dick and Jason are big into Taylor Swift, Jason because I think he’d like ballads/the lyrics in songs and Dick because he’s Dick

Selina Kyle actually likes the Robins, and her and Steph got along well

Jason and Steph have really thick Gotham accents, which I like to think is like a Jersey accent, Jason’s shows up more when he’s upset in any capacity, Steph’s is always there and was never trained out of her

Dick has this weird accent where it’s very clearly not anything American, but it’s not not American, and it’s because he moved so much and was around people woth so many different accents that his voice never settled on one

Damian talks to himself in Arabic- Jason knows a bit of it

Cass is a messy eater (this isn’t cannon is it?)

I think it’s be funny to imagine Tim, Cass and Steph going to High School together

Steph was that one girl in the Cookie Monster pjs in high school, and Tim was like this weird goth/skater kid

[marie-swriting]

Lose This With You - Katherine Pierce

Masterlist

Summary : you're in a relationship with Katherine but she's always starting fights with you even though you could have something beautiful.

Warnings : reader is a vampire, arguing, mention of Katherine's traumas, angst, good ending, consumming alcohol (be careful with your alcohol consumption), maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language so tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 2k

French version

Song inspiration : Afterglow by Taylor Swift

“Oh my God, I’m so sick of arguing with you. I just feel like I’m talking to a brick wall every time.” you exclaim, massaging your temples.

“So you think I’m the only one in the wrong in this situation ?” Katherine retorts dryly.

“I’ve never said that ! I’m sure I’m also wrong as well but it doesn’t mean you can accuse me of things I didn’t do ! Could we, for once, talk about it calmly ? The only thing we do is yell at each other then act as if nothing happened. We never solve the problem.”

“But I’ve been talking since the beginning.”

“No, since the beginning, you’ve been shouting and throwing accusations at my face, it’s different. At least, listen to what I have to say.” you beg, Katherine shakes her head.

“I don’t wanna listen to you.”

“Katherine-” you sigh, though she cuts you off.

“No ! Actually, I don’t want to talk to you anymore. Leave.” she orders, emotionless. 

“Really ? You don’t even want to try to sort this out ?” you ask, exasperated.

“There’s nothing to sort out. I don’t even know why I decided to get with you in the first place. I don’t even care about you.”

As soon as you hear Katherine pronounce these words, your heart tightens in your chest and you look down. Your eyes stings but you don’t let a tear roll down your cheek. You don’t want to show her she’s hurt you, though she doesn’t need to see your face to know it. Your shoulders down are enough. Even if a part of Katherine wants to take back what she just said, her anger is stronger so she keeps talking, twisting the knife in your chest.

“So leave, I don’t want to see you ever again.”

“Very well,” you start after taking a deep breath and looking up to her, “but don’t come back to me crying when you’ll realise you’ve fucked it up.”

“It won’t happen.”

“Perfect, then !”

You keep your gaze on Katherine for a few seconds before leaving your shared apartment. You slam the door and Katherine holds back her tears when she’s confronted by the silence. Your breath is heavy whilst you start crying. You wipe your tears with anger before going to the Salvatores’.

Your friendship with the two brothers is, additionally, often the object of your arguments between you and Katherine, your last altercation is no exception. You were supposed to meet them for a few hours and when she learned about it, Katherine started to scream at you while you were confused about the reasons behind her annoyance. Sure, you know they’re not the best of friends, but the tension between the three of them is not like it used to be. Furthermore, you've been friends with Stefan and Damon longer than you know Katherine. You had met them when they had just been turned into vampires. You had tried to help them thanks to your two hundred years experience as a vampire. Therefore, your friendship with the two men is important for you. As for Katherine, you met her only a few years ago and your relationship is even newer. Notwithstanding, the love you have for Katherine is just as important. For the first time in your long life, you feel like you’ve discovered the real meaning of ‘love’, however your numerous fights are slowly ruining everything. Generally, you never give up that easily when a conflict erupts. You tried giving her space and coming back to her later and even leaving her alone until she’s calmed enough to settle everything, yet there’s nothing to do. As soon as a tough time is behind you, she finds you a new flaw. 

Over time, you got used to the disputes. You’ve already said awful things to each other, you’ve already stayed several days without talking until you make the first step. Yet, you’re more and more tired of this situation and knowing she doesn’t want to see you anymore doesn’t help to save your relationship. The more time goes by, the more you tell yourself it’s destined to fail. You can’t spend forever arguing. It’s not what you want. So you decide to give up. You tried but she doesn’t want to make an effort so what’s the point of trying so hard ?

Once you’re at Stefan and Damon’s, you pour yourself a glass of Bourbon before greeting them. They instantly understand what happened. Damon doesn’t even react when he sees you pouring another glass. He knows his bottle is doomed for the night, this one and the next one he has in stock.

While you explain to them your last fight, Katherine hasn’t moved yet. She’s still in the middle of your living room, overwhelmed by her emotions. This time, she tells herself she probably took things too far. Deep down, she’s aware she’s the reason behind all of your problems in your relationship, even if she refuses to admit it to you. The look on your face when she implied she never cared about you is still engraved in her mind. She hates seeing you in pain and yet, she feels like she’s almost always the cause of it. Well, it’s not just a feeling, she knows she is. And she hates herself for it. Katherine doesn’t understand why she persists to destroy your relationship. You do everything to make it work. You love her, more than you should, according to her, and she loves you. You give your all for her and in return, she only gives you back baseless accusations. 

Katherine lets a small sob leave her lips before breaking down. Just like you, Katherine is tired of this situation. But above all, she doesn’t want to lose you. However, with what she told you and the way you left, she thinks it’s already too late. She keeps crying the whole night, mad at herself for everything she put you through. Katherine wishes to erase what she said, start all over again, however it’s not possible. She knows you guys have the potential to be something beautiful, if she wouldn’t let her fears speak. At first, Katherine is desperate, certain she has destroyed everything, then she tells herself she might have a small chance to fix your relationship if, for the first time in her life, she doesn’t run away. Determined, but scared nonetheless, Katherine leaves your apartment to find you. She doesn’t have to think to know you’re at the mansion. You always go to them after a fight. Katherine only hopes they won’t close the door to her face and you’ll like to listen to her.

You wake up when you feel someone shaking you. When you open your eyes, you see Stefan in front of you. Without a word, he points at something behind him and you notice Katherine on the doorstep, looking at you with an awkward and sorry expression on her face. You sigh loudly before meeting her. You cross your arms on your chest to show your annoyance. 

“May we talk ?” she enquiries with a small voice.

“I don’t know, you told me you didn’t want to do it anymore yesterday.” you retort, drily.

“Please. It’ll only take a few minutes. I really need to talk to you.”

When you see her pleading look, you decide to do it, not without rolling your eyes at your incapacity to go up against her.

“Alright, but not here, I don’t want any prying ears.”

Katherine steps aside to let you walk out of the mansion whilst you close the door behind you. You both walk in the forest nearby. 

On top of being silent, with your stance, we can tell you’re on the defensive, ready to attack if Katherine says something wrong. This doesn’t help Katherine to muster up her courage, but she knows she needs to do it. She needs to talk to you. She’s ruined everything, so she has to be the one to do the right thing.

“I am sorry.” Katherine starts, looking you in the eyes.

“‘Sorry’ doesn’t mean anything if you don’t fix your behaviour.”

“I am deeply sorry. Not only for yesterday, but also for all the other times. You’re right, we never talk. Or more precisely, I never allow us to communicate.”, she admits, surprising you, “Everytime we finish arguing or rather when I finish screaming, I act as if nothing happened, I don’t take responsibility for my mistakes and it’s not the thing to do. Besides, I know I’ve been hurting you since the beginning of our relationship. I’m always searching for every unpleasant vice to use against you, I do everything to push you away and I think this time, I’ve succeeded, but it’s not what I want. I care about you, more than you know. I don’t know why I always have to break what I love so much. I want to stop ruining our relationship, I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”

“It’s all well and good what you’re saying, but how can I be sure those aren’t empty promises ?”

“Yesterday, when you left, I realised I’m destroying our relationship and I want it to stop. It’s just, I’m not used to having a bit of happiness so whenever I do, I’m afraid to lose it. I always lose everything, since the day my daughter was taken away from me and I’m scared you’re going to give up on me or you’ll end up hurting me, so I prefer to attack first. I know it’s not an excuse, I shouldn’t put my fears and my traumas on you, it’s not fair. You deserve that I treat you as well as you do. I don’t want to keep hurting you. I love you and I don’t want to lose this with you.”, Katherine continues as she waves between you two, “If it’s not too late, I’d like to have one last chance to prove to you I can be better. And for that, I need to apologise first. I am sorry that I hurt you. And I am sorry for always avoiding conversations, for giving you the silent treatment when you tried to talk to me, but above all, I am sorry to not allow myself to trust you while you do everything for me. I’m to blame and I’m taking responsibility for all my faults now. If I have already destroyed everything, you can tell me. However, I hope I’m still yours like you’re still mine and I hope you can tell me we’ll be alright, even when I lose my mind and, despite all the times I broke your heart, I’m still all you want. If it’s not the case, I’ll understand. I didn’t do anything to avoid this situation.” she states with teary eyes.

“First of all, I appreciate seeing you come to me and I’m glad you’ve realised a few things. I want to believe you really want to change, but how can I know it’s true ? How can I know, two weeks from now, we won’t be at each other’s throat again like we’ve been doing since the beginning ?” you ask, sceptical, “I don’t want to stay in a relationship where we slowly kill each other.”

“I promise you, from now on, I want to and I will make an effort. I love you too much to see you go.” she says, taking your hands, “Yesterday was enough to make me realise I won’t be able to live without you. Give me one last chance and if I keep blowing things out of proportion, still blame you for things that aren’t true, I’ll let you go. But I believe this love is worth the fight and I want to do it now.”

When you hear her determined tone, you can’t help but admit with this discussion, Katherine just proved to you she’s genuine in her promise. She really wants to make an effort for you, for the both of you. A part of you still fears it’s only a temporary promise yet you want to believe in Katherine, you want to believe she really wants to try with you.

“I can’t deny, you seem sincere. For the first time in our relationship, we’re talking and I’m happy about it. I don’t want to lose this with you either. I’d like to try one last time.” you smile, stroking her cheek.

“You won’t regret it, I promise.”

And you never did.

Masterlist

{This is my side blog so I'll be answering comments under the username @marie-sworld}

[axtssmnfr]

Pictures from my most recent trip to Iunu, the temple of Hutheru. March 2024.

Every time i visit i think i leave crying… this recent time i wrote something in my notes on the drive back home. it’s not a very good piece of writing, fueled by blinding emotion.

A Lament for Dendera

O Hathor, Your temple is ruined.

The unfaithful walk in Your sanctuary,

Your pure place is filled with refuse.

Your high walls, these gleaming images,

are cracked and chipped away

by those who shall never comprehend

Your beauty, Your power.

Power here is held by the greedy,

who say I will let you in Her innermost shrine, for a price,

and the scholars misguide the pilgrims.

Lonely is Your shrine, with no gold,

with no lapis, with no carnelian, or turquoise.

The feet of the impure trod upon Your most hidden places,

and everywhere is the scent of absence and decay.

And the faithful, who come silently, are persecuted

Your followers are shamed and denigrated

as the lowest of beings,

by the keepers of Your temple.

Yet the lotus flower is still set in Your innermost shrine,

and prayers of Your praise and names are muttered

Quietly, in echoing halls,

once filled with priests of great devotion

and the fires of Your light.

The faithful come quietly

and bow in the shadow;

now a spectacle of humor

to the keepers and scholars of Your temple.

I leave my offerings and obeisances to You,

O Great Hathor,

whose shrine sits vacant and dim,

filled with singing birds

who fly through Your halls and nest within the walls.

I give my life and my heart to You,

O Beautiful Hathor,

whose temple is but a curiosity to the people of Your land,

who no longer know of Your glory

O Hathor, may You forever care for the birds of Your great temple,

may You forever tend to the cats who roam it’s halls.

May You halt the one who stops the songs of Your praise,

may You guide Your followers

to the gates of Your temple

and to Your vacant arms,

that gladly accept the joyous, and saddened, tears of the people.

^^^^^

Some personal thoughts:

Dendera is one of my favourite temples. Something always happens when i visit. The first time i went, i was able to sneak up onto the uppermost roof, where people used to come to sleep in hopes of being healed. This recent time i was greeted by a pregnant cat who curled up in my lap as i sang a hymn for our Lady Huther. i cried as she did. and, in one of the hidden crypts, i found someone had offered a lotus flower.

Unfortunately the experience is always tainted by people. “Guides” who want you to pay for things you don’t need to pay for. Who say you aren’t allowed to take photos, aren’t allowed to look at something or lie in the hypostyle hall and stare at the ceiling, without personally paying them. (You don’t have to pay them, they’re making it up, and they’ll go away if you tell them to fuck off. Or they will get the guy with the gun and then you have to pay both of them.) Then they lead you to the shrine room and tell you to touch the wall for ‘healing’. And there is a mark where the oil of everyone who listened to them touched, and it is degrading the paint and carvings. So i have a lot of detestation for such people. they upset my heart. and that is why i have written this lament. that is why i leave Dendera crying each time.

[chicago-pd-is-weird]

Oneshot - Hank Voight and The Crackhead Detective

Just a little oneshot based on what I think Hank’s retirement would generally be like! This comes from the co-written story called Hank Voight and The Crackhead Detective. It’s pinned in my profile right now!

“It’s a good gig, Hank,” Kate said as she sat at the table. It had been several years since she first met the Sergeant. “And it’s at the kids’ school. You’d see the three of them every day, along with all the other kids of Chicago. I know you love to help troubled youth here. This is a great opportunity to show them what a real policeman is. Not the crap they see on the news.” She sipped her hot cocoa as Hank finally settled across from her with coffee.

“I don’t know. I’d rather stay here and take the scumbags off the street.”

“Yeah, but they’re forcing you into retirement. You can’t hit the field like you used to. It’s either retirement or a place in the Ivory Tower until you die. Look, Adam is more than capable of taking over the unit, and I know you don’t want to be on a desk job. This is how you can still be out there and making a difference.”

Hank avoided her gaze, staring at the steam coming from his mug. He didn’t say anything for a while, contemplating the idea. Kate had been talking about this to him for months, weaseling the idea into his head every time they saw one another, which was quite often seeing as Hank was practically a grandfather to her kids. He let out a long sigh, then finally met her eyes. He felt he didn’t have much of a choice, seeing as they really were making him retire from Intelligence. He nodded. “Alright, set it up.”

—

Three months later…

—

Kate smiled as she walked on Adam’s arm into the school, looking around at the colorful displays and billboards the students had made. “You think Lillia will remember that one line?”

“If not, we can shout it from the audience,” Adam replied with a small laugh. “I think I have her entire song memorized myself at this point.”

“Aww, do you sing it to your unit at work?”

“I’ll admit, I’ve been caught singing a few times before I’ve had my coffee.”

Kate laughed and moved into the auditorium with Adam, taking a seat in the front row, instinctively closer to the doors. Despite being off-duty, the two were still police, and were ready to jump into action should something happen.

Just as they got settled, someone walked up to them, a familiar voice hitting their ears. “Well, if it isn’t the Ruzeks.”

Kate and Adam both looked up, Kate smiling and standing to greet him. “Sergeant Voight, to what do we owe the pleasure?” She hugged him gently, looking him over. He was dressed in his white shirt and tie. He wore his name tag on his chest and displayed the stripes on his sleeve proudly.

As she hugged him, he smiled widely and kissed her temple. “Just here doing my job.”

Adam was next, shaking Hank’s hand but going in for a hug afterwards. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy, Boss.” Adam still called Hank “Boss” despite the two of them being the same rank. In his mind, Voight would always be his superior.

Hank didn’t seem to mind. “I owe it to Kate. She pulled a lot of strings to get me here.”

Kate waved her hand dismissively. “Oh stop it, Hank. They needed a new SRO. I just highly recommended you to anyone who would listen. Same way I convinced you to take the job.”

“By talking about it at every opportunity?”

Kate laughed and nodded, sitting back down in her seat with Adam as Hank settled beside them. “Has it been alright?”

“It’s been… really great. Better than I thought it would be.” Hank smiled over at her. “You know me really well. I didn’t think I’d like it half as much as I do now.”

“Hank, I make a living out of reading people.” Kate smiled. “I clocked you the first week I was with you.”

“Except you thought you’d make him take furlough halfway through the week,” Adam chimed in.

Kate scoffed. “To be fair, I had no idea everyone in the Intelligence Unit was a misfit and an outlier. I mean, come on. Everyone I’d treated similarly had taken furlough. I think the record was two and a half days.”

“I shattered that,” Hank said with a smile. Despite the torture he’d endured after first meeting Kate, he’d come to love her that first week, though admittedly, not until the last day. He knew she was a person underneath her quirky exterior the morning of the fifth day, which made him warm up to her quickly after that.

“Exactly. There was you, and then everyone in your unit at the time. I mean, everyone laughed at some point, I think with the exception of Al, who was really tense, but after I brought him bananas and oranges, he opened up to me. Antonio invited me to his boxing gym after that. Jay and Kevin invited me out to Molly’s with Kim. And then Adam fell in love with me, for goodness sake.” She shrugged and smiled. “You just had a whole bunch of misfits that I happened to fit in with.”

Hank smiled. “I guess that’s just who I am - I’ve taken in strays since I was on the beat.” He shrugged a little as he stood. “Look, I’m gonna take another lap or two around to make sure everything’s alright, but save this seat for me when the show starts?”

Kate nodded. “Consider it done.”

Hank leaned down to kiss her head again, then shook Adam’s hand before leaving the auditorium. He roamed the hallways, watching the people as they filed in. He made his way out to the back of the auditorium, where the kids were lined up in the hallways, chatting as they got ready for the concert. First, Hank caught sight of Lillia, who walked over and hugged him. “Hi Grandpa Hank!”

“Hey Lillia,” he said softly, embracing her before pulling away to look down at her, hands on her shoulders. “Are you ready?”

“I… I’m trying to make sure I remember it,” she said, shifting her weight. “It’s hard.”

“You’ve got this, alright? Your mom is saving me a seat in the front row.”

“You’re gonna listen to me sing?” She smiled up at him.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Get back to your spot, okay?” He patted her back softly as she returned back to her spot. Hank walked further down the hallway, greeting a lot of the kids he knew, though he was seeking out one person in particular. He stopped to talk to Carter and Damien, who each hugged him and told him they’d be singing a duet. Again, Hank told them he’d be in the front row, beside their parents. He continued on, still seeking out one person. When he didn’t find him, he walked back through the hallway again. The kids started to file backstage in order as the show began.

Hank sighed, slowly moving through the halls as his mind raced with thoughts. He stopped at a corner just in time to see the kid he was looking for running up. “Hey, uh, Sergeant Voight, am I too late?”

Hank smiled down at him, putting a hand on his back. “Come on, everyone’s lined up backstage.”

“Are you sure I should do this? I don’t think-“

“Of course I’m sure, Camden,” he replied before letting him finish. “I’ve heard you sing. Look, I’ll be in the front row. Just find me, and sing to me. Nobody else matters.”

Camden sighed and stopped, turning to face him. “I don’t think I can do this…”

“Of course you can,” Hank replied, putting firm hands on his shoulders. “I’ll be watching, alright? I know you can do this. Just find me. Front row. To your left.”

Camden looked over Hank’s face for a moment, then slowly nodded. Hank smiled and adjusted Camden’s tie before pointing down the hallway. He turned and ran down it without another word to get his spot in line.

Hank smiled, then walked back through and into the auditorium just as the announcements were over. He sat down beside Kate again, watching the performances one by one.

.

When Camden took the stage, everything was quiet. He swallowed hard, looking like a deer in the headlights. His hands were by his side, gripping his pants tightly. At first, nothing happened as he looked over the crowd. The piano player took a long time to shuffle through the music before finding his piece.

Kate looked up at him, leaning over to Adam. “Poor thing looks more nervous than Lillia did.” She held his hand, using her other hand to rub his arm. Adam only hummed in response.

The piano music started, Camden looking out over the crowd. He seemed overwhelmed by the lights and the dozens of people in the audience. They could see his heart beating out of his chest, and he couldn’t hear anything but the thumping inside his own head.

When Camden missed his cue, it took him a moment to realize it before frowning as the piano stopped. The piano player looked to him. Camden cleared his throat and looked down, then back up.

Hank got up, standing and walking up to the stage, standing below it. “Hey, hey Camden,” he said softly. Camden’s eyes met Hanks as his face was illuminated. “Hey, don’t look at them. Look at me. It’s just me. Sing to me, okay? I’m right here, front row.”

Camden swallowed hard again, then nodded. Hank nodded to the piano player who started playing again. Hank slowly walked backward and took his seat in the front row, ignoring the knowing look from Kate and Adam. His eyes were locked with Camden’s as he began singing on cue.

Everyone in the audience was surprised by the melodious voice that came from the young man on stage. Even Kate and Adam were taken aback, seemingly entranced with everyone else in the audience as Camden sang “Africa” by Toto. When the chorus swelled, Camden closed his eyes and sang with deep passion and energy. Hank’s face split into a wide smile.

When the performance was over, Hank stood and clapped loudly, Kate and Adam following. Everyone else in the audience stood and clapped, cheering for the young man on stage. Hank cheered the loudest from the front row. Camden smiled widely, motioning Hank up on stage. Hank waved his hand dismissively, but Kate and Adam urged him to go. Hank reluctantly moved up the steps and into the stage, walking over and putting a hand on Camden’s shoulder as he smiled. “I told you you could do it.”

Camden smiled and hugged Hank. “Not without you.” Hank chuckled, but Camden grabbed the microphone. “Sergeant Voight believed in me. I think we’re all really thankful he decided to come to our school and be our SRO. Me, most of all. He believes in all of us.”

Hank walked with Camden backstage as the audience continued to applaud. When they were out in the hallways behind the auditorium, Camden hugged him again. “I meant it.”

“I know, kid. I know.” He smiled and hugged the boy tightly. “Now, you need to keep singing, alright? Sign up for chorus on Monday.”

“Yes sir,” Camden said, nodding and then taking his place backstage once more until the show was over.

Hank went back to the auditorium to take his seat beside Kate as the last few performances went. Then, everyone went out and bowed before the show was over. Hank stuck around with Kate and Adam as they greeted Lillia, Carter, and Damien. Camden came over to hang around them, and Hank introduced Camden to Kate’s children.

.

When they finally left, Hank watched everyone file out, doing one more round to ensure everything was good before the administrators locked up for the night. Camden sat outside on the steps as Hank walked out. He frowned. “Hey, nobody come to get you?”

“Ma prolly forgot about me again,” he said with a shrug. “She’ll remember eventually.”

Hank sighed. “You’re not going to sit out here in the cold?”

Camden shrugged. “Don’t really have a choice. It’s safer here than walking ten blocks home in the dark anyways.”

Hank shook his head. “Come on, I’ll give you a ride home.”

“Nah you don’t have to-“

“It’s on my way. Come on.” Hank urged the boy, who barely had a coat, to go with him as he walked down the steps. Camden followed him and got into the passenger seat of his SUV. Hank turned on the heat, allowing Camden to soak it up as he drove him home, not in any particular hurry to return the boy to his drugged-up mother.

.

When they arrived at Camden’s house, Hank looked to him. He put his hands on his shoulders. “Hey, look at me.” Camden met his eyes. “You’re better than your mom and dad. You’re better than drugs and jail and gangs and guns. You can have a better life. Don’t let them pull you into it. I’ve seen what happens to kids who let themselves get pulled in. Don’t let them, alright?”

Camden nodded slowly, letting out a small breath. “What if they make me?”

“Then- here.” He rustled around in his center console for a moment before pulling out a card. “Then you come talk to me, or you call the number on that card.”

Camden took the card. “Ruzek?”

“He’s my very good friend. You met him earlier. He’s a cop too, and if you can’t wait to see me, you call him, alright? You won’t be in any trouble if you call. We’ll protect you.”

Camden nodded slowly, taking the card and putting it in his pocket. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

That’s when Camden’s mother, in her nightgown, stepped out onto the porch. She waved at Hank in the car, urging Camden to come in. Camden reluctantly got out, saying bye to Hank and walking inside the house with his mother.

Hank sighed, waiting for a moment before slowly pulling out of the driveway. He’d seen that movie before, and hoped this time would turn out even better than Erin did.

[trashcanplant]

Many Well Wishes for the New Year

It was getting late as all of the neighbors piled into Paulette’s observatory. They greeted everyone at the door with a smile, all dressed in hues of blue and yellow and star themes. It was the yearly Turnover party after all!

He walked quickly up to the platform she had set up, decorated in silver tinsel and golden stars.

“Is everyone here? I’d appreciate if everyone would listen, please” Paulette began, holding a small cup of fruit juice in the air. She scanned the crowd, smiling at each of his neighbors and friends.

“I want to say that this year has been a very good one. I think we’ve all made a lot of friends, and in turn, grown for the better! I know that there are people who couldn’t be here tonight to witness the turning over of the morning star, but I believe that they’re here with us. In spirit.” They smiled, making eye contact with a morose Penny who was standing next to Poppy.

“I’d like to thank my cousin, Howdy, for helping me set up all these decorations. I’d also like to thank the Fruitbat family, who aren’t with us right now, but who gave us the fruit punch that we’re drinking tonight. And I’d like to thank.. you. Thank you for being here to witness this incredible celestial event with me. It means a lot that everyone has so graciously welcomed me into this neighborhood. I truly love each and every one of you.” She smiled and raised his glass.

“To the new year!” Paulette toasted, looking down at their neighbors as they cheered. She then turned his eyes to the skylight and watched as a colorful aurora rose across the sky. It cast blues and pinks and greens and teals all across the observatory. They smiled as shooting stars painted the night sky. The party could truly begin now!

Marnie sat down on one of Paulette’s couches, idly sipping her punch. She noticed that no music was playing, which was truly a disgrace. All this beauty with no scenic score? Marnie reached into her tote bag and took out a record. She walked over to the player and started spinning the songs. It was gentle instrumental music that had an heir of wonder around it. Light theremin followed in the song. She was sufficiently satisfied and sat back down. If someone wanted to talk to her, they would find her.

At the food table was Antoni and Dandy. They were laughing and serving their neighbors food. He turned to his sister for a moment.

“Hey, Dandy.” He spoke as a cheesy grin spread across his face.

“Yes, Antoni?” She asked, her rhinophores twitching slightly as she listened to the twinkling of the stars and the sound of her brother.

“What’s your plans for the new year?” He asked, taking one of the saltwater taffies from her side of the table. Dandy grinned.

“Well… probably not a lot. Maybe get out of the shop more often. But overall, I think I’m happy keeping you safe and making candy.” She replied, giving her brothers hair a ruffle.

“Hey! You stop that Candace Dandelion Pizzario!” He shouted with a tease. Dandy gasped at her full name being used before putting Antoni in a headlock.

“Only if you make me Antoni Bluebell!” She shouted back.

Frank, who just wanted some pizza quickly turned away and walked back over to where he was standing with Deirdre.

“Those two always play so rough, don’t they, Ms. Dewmoore?” He asked, rubbing his temple. Deirdre looked up from her book and over at the twins.

“I think they’re just like that. Similar to you and Julie, just more physical, wouldn’t you say?” She asked in turn. Frank chuckled lightly.

“I suppose you’re right. Speaking of Julie, where did she go?” He asked, looking around before his eyes found her talking to Marnie on the couch. The musician was braiding her hair.

“Looks like it’s a Turnover miracle. It seems our best friends are friends, Mr. Frankly.” Deirdre smiled, walking over to them and sitting on the couch with them. Frank followed in suite.

“—And I was telling Eddie that the right dance to do during a Turnover party is the Hokey Pokey! Oh! Hiya Frank! Hi Deedee!” Julie said, waving at them.

“It’s Deirdre, Ms. Joyful.” Deirdre said with a low chuckle.

“Right right, I’m sorry! Frank, Deirdre, what do you think is the right dance to do at a Turnover party?” Julie asked, tilting her head. Marnie looked on from behind the mass amounts of hair.

“Quit moving so much, Jules.” Marnie chided as she gently wrapped the braid in a hair tie. Julie mumbled an apology, looking at the academics.

“Well, I think it depends on the party, Julie. I like a dance like Ma Navu myself, but I think there’s plenty of dances that can be done at a Turnover party.” Deirdre said. Julie tilted her head and Marnie gave it a light pat as a reminder. Frank chuckled.

“Oh yes, a folk dance like that is perfect! Maybe that’s a bit slow though?” Frank asked while Julie rolled her eyes in boredom.

Sitting by the window and looking onward at the stars was Penny. She was waiting for Poppy to return from the food table when a gentle furry hand patted on her shoulder.

“Hey. You alright there, Penn?” Barnaby asked. Penny nodded slowly. She didn’t really talk to Barnaby often, and was confused why he was talking to her. He sighed lightly and sat down.

“I get how you’re feeling right now. That silly scarecrow just makes everything better, y’know? It’s been almost a month, but it’s like he’s still around. Just sayin’, he wouldn’t want ya to be all sad. So perk up, okay?” Barnaby spoke to her, patting her back before he noticed Wally in the corner.

“Hold on a second-“ Penny interrupted his standing. The comedian simply sat back down.

“Yeah?”

“Does Grover like Turnover? Is he… celebrating right now with his other friends?” Penny asked a bit sadly. Barnaby took a breath. He didn’t know the answer, really only knowing that Grover’s favorite holiday was Mail-In-Times day. But seeing Penny frown made him want to make her feel better.

“Of course he does! He’s sitting under the stars right now and celebrating with us. Just in his winter town. If he coulda been here, he woulda.” He said. The answer seemed to soothe Penny’s conscious and Barnaby left. Poppy approached her with a small plate with of star-shaped cookies.

“Peachpie are you okay? You look upset.” Poppy asked. Penny immediately took a cookie and felt better as she bit into it.

“I’m just peachy, dearie!” She responded with a smile. Poppy smiled worriedly and wiped crumbs from Penny’s lips.

Up the split level was Paulette and Howdy. The two caterpillars were clinking their glasses together lightly.

“I gotta say Paul, this sure is one good party! The whole neighborhood’s here!” Howdy said with a guffaw. Paulette smirked gently and put the glass against her lips.

“I certainly did my best. If anything, I owe this party to you! Thank you for advertising for me.” He thanked. Howdy scoffed lightly and pat Paulette on the back.

“Of course! I know how nervous ya get when ya have to talk to a lotta people. Nice job on the speech, by the way.” He complimented. Paulette smiled carefully and sighed.

“Happy new year, Howdy.” She said.

“Happy new year, Paulie.” He replied.

(penny and dandy belong to @cherrythepuppet)

[trickster-jpeg]

Just A Man, I'm Not A Hero. Just A Boy, Who Had To Sing This Song.

Summary: Marc just gotten the call that his mom had died, and he has no idea how to feel about it.

Warnings: Suicidal ideation, self blame, a lot of internal conflict, and references to child abuse.

Word Count: 983 It's On AO3 -> Here

His mom was dead. Gone, deceased, never coming back. He was never going to see her again and he felt physically sick. He’d just gotten the phone call about the funeral, about the shiva, and he was fucking terrified. How could she just be gone? He’d felt her lingering over his shoulder, his identity, his entire life, and now he was just supposed to accept the fact that she’d never be there again. He’d done everything he physically could to get away from her, and now that he knew that he’d never have to see her again, he was terrified. He wanted her back. He didn’t want her to be gone. He wanted his mom back.

He missed her. Missed the way she’d smile at him. The times she’d rub little circles into his back until he fell asleep. How she’d leave the door open just a sliver with the landing light on, just because he was terrified of the dark. She’d hold him and let him sleep next to her when he’d woken up crying his eyes out from a nightmare, singing to him in a soft and hushed voice. The way he’d try to squirm away as she’d fuss over his appearance before going to temple. Always making a show of singing him happy birthday, making sure he had a nice cake and a party. The way she’d smiled at him the first time he held his baby brother and made sure that he knew he’d always be there for him, to look out for him. Because that’s what big brothers did.

It should’ve been me. I should’ve been the one to die. I never should’ve brought him into that cave. I broke her heart by killing her son.

He had also been her son. Her first born. He’d been the one to survive, and after that she had treated him like he was dead to her. Like he’d drowned alongside his brother. That the boy that had survived wasn’t a boy but a creature. Some monster that had crawled into the corpse of the person he was, the son she knew, and replaced him to suck the life force out of the family. And he hated himself for it. He had hated himself more than he had ever thought he was capable of feeling anything before and it was all because she did.

Society tells children that their parents know everything. That they’re meant to be respected and listened to, that they pass wisdom onto their next of kin in the hopes that their children can be better people than they were. Kids are never told that their parents are wrong. Your parents are smart, they know a lot more than a child would so you should take their word as gospel. But what happens when the people that you’re dependent on to survive suddenly turn their backs on you? What to do when your mom starts drinking? When she suddenly starts to scream at you. To blame you. When she starts to beat you. Tries to abandon you. He was never told what to do when his mom threatens to kill him. When she tried to kill him.

“I brought you into this world and I can take you out of it.”

She made him feel disgusting. So fucking worthless. So small, so weak, so fucking scared. And so incredibly fucking angry. He hated her. Hated the way she made him feel. Hated the things that she did to him, the things she forced him to go through. How he had to stay quiet. How he had conditioned himself into being good and not talking about it just because her reputation would be ruined. Because it would make her look bad and he didn’t want her to look bad because he loved her. And any time he thought about telling someone, just to say something- anything, he just wanted to punish himself because of how awful a son he would’ve been to destroy her image and make people see her like that in that light. Because if he told people lies about his mom he’d be a bad son, and good sons don’t speak badly of their mothers.

The more he thought about it the sicker he felt. The emptier he felt. It made him want to scream until his throat bled. Made him want to choke on his own blood until he was gagging from the overwhelming iron taste filling his mouth, drowning his lungs. The urges he’d get to try and kill himself in the most painful, damaging ways and purposefully survive so he had to live with the things he’d done to himself. The burning desires to grasp at his hair and tear it from his scalp, to gouge and gnaw at the skin on his fingers until he’d peeled down to the bones.

All he could think about was the nights as a child that he’d spent wishing she would just die. He could only think about the guilt that choked him like a noose after realising what he’d thought, what he’d whispered aloud to himself as he lay in bed with the moon dusting a faint light across his face. The betrayal he felt in his mind at even considering that acceptable for a split second, just for a selfish craving to be released from the never ending nightmare of both his waking and sleeping life.

But now that she was gone, all he wanted was to hug her one last time. To apologise to her. To try and make peace. And deep down he was fucking ashamed more than he would ever fully be able to even comprehend. Because he was still just that scared little boy stuck in the water-filled cave, just barely able to keep his head up above the water level. That scared little boy who just needed a mom.

[andrevasims]

Question Tag Thingies

I kept forgetting to do these, but now I remembered lol

There was 2 different but similar tag game things, so I’ll just do them together!

Tagged by @pikselis @twofee @mdpthatsme @polynovskaya and @thesimofmanu! Thanks so much for thinking of me ^_^

Underneath a read-more cause it got kinda long :P

Rules: Tag 9 people you would like to get to know more/catch up with

Last Song: I was listening to a mix on YouTube of 2000s hip hop at work :P

I can listen to music while I’m working, but so I don’t pull my phone out all the time I try to find hour-long DJ mixes (in hopes that fast/dance-y music will keep my energy up as I do boring work all day lol)

I use the app PlayTube instead of the official YouTube app or YouTube Music, because it has no ads (for FREE!!) and also lets the video continue playing when I lock my phone or minimize the app. Its autoplay feature is actually pretty good at finding another similar hour-long mix to play after the one I searched, so I usually don’t even notice the video changed.

Though PlayTube is probably the 3rd or 4th unofficial YouTube app I’ve had in the past few years, because after a while they either must get Cease & Desist’d or something by YouTube, or they just end up doing what I’m trying to avoid and make you pay for things and/or show ads.

Last Show: Do web shows count? I don’t really watch anything else lol - For that it would be UNHhhh :P I think they’re so funny, and their dynamic reminds me a lot of my friend & me. My friend also watches them, so we’re always joking about who acts like Trixie & who acts like Katya lol

Currently Watching: Umm idk, gameplay videos on YouTube lol

Currently Reading: Not really currently, but I reread Ghost World by Daniel Clowes after getting a physical copy of it - idk if that counts because it’s a comic lol but it’s just my favorite.... thing in general, so I’m really happy I have a physical copy of it that I can see & hold & stuff lol

Current Obsession: I guess my PS2, but now that I’ve reinstalled TS2 it’s fallen a bit to the wayside :P I’ve had it on my computer desk hooked up to my monitor for quite a while now, just no active interest in playing my PS2 games. But then I got the first 2 Katamari games, and that’s been really fun!

----------------------------------------------------

15 Questions for 15 Mutuals

1. Are you named after anyone?

Umm well I named myself lol but it’s basically a shortening of my last name, so... I’m named after myself :P

2. When was the last time you cried?

When I got a migraine last week. It was this super intense aching pain behind my eyes & temples that lasted for hours/days, and I was woken up by the worst of it after the acetaminophen I took wore off.

Although it hurt, tbh I’m kinda used to just powering through pain, so I didn’t think much of it other than it sucks, but then I started crying as like an instinctive reaction to the pain? idk as I was crying I was like “What, this doesn’t even hurt that bad” lol it was completely automatic

3. Do you have kids?

Nope, I don’t plan on having any either - I’m getting an (elective) hysterectomy in a few weeks actually lol so if for some reason I ever change my mind despite never doing so yet, they’re not coming from me :P

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Pretty much never - I’m very literal about things, and although I can recognize when people are using it I just don’t really see like... the point in adding to it myself I guess? Like if we’re using sarcasm to “secretly” talk about not liking something, I’d rather just openly talk about not liking the thing instead of going “Ohh yeahhh this thing is sooo goood *eyeroll*” over & over lolsdfgdf

5. What sports do you play/have you played?

Roller derby, kind of? I’ve never done any sports even as a kid, but back in 2017 I spent a few weeks training with my city’s roller derby team. I didn’t know how to roller skate at all before I started, but as it’d be hard to find enough people to make a team otherwise they just teach everyone roller skating from the beginning.

I never got on the team, mainly because it involved time/money I didn’t really have at that point, and idk what my results on their final skill evaluation was so I’m not sure if I’d have made it anyway lol. I wasn’t that set on playing on the team though, I just thought I’d try something new for once and I got to learn how to roller skate out of it!

6. What’s the first thing you notice about other people?

Probably how they treat others, like if they’re talking to people or in a group nearby me I end up listening to their conversations - I mean they’re right there and I have no control over my sense of attention/focus sooooo lol

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I like both, only having one or the other gets a little boring :P

8. Any special talents?

idk how special I’d actually call it, but a lot of my coworkers point it out as something I’m really good at (which I think is weird because it seems normal but that’s just me lol) - I guess my ability to figure out solutions to things?

Like I’m not that smart tbh but I know the steps to basic troubleshooting, trial & error, process of elimination, etc.... That just feels like common sense to me, but apparently not everyone uses it lol

9. Where were you born?

Midwest US, where everyone used to joke about how cold it was but now they don’t because climate change yaaaay -_-

10. What are your hobbies?

Whatever lets me be creative, like customizing/decorating things I have, taking photos, drawing, and video games of course!

11. Do you have any pets?

Nooo, I love cats but my apartment is really small and since I’m at work all day I’d feel bad for making a cat live here lol

12. How tall are you?

5′5″, I actually thought I was 5′4″ until like 6 months ago lol - I swear I was before, though I’m not really measuring my height regularly :P

13. Fave subject in school?

Probably history, cause it’s interesting to learn about but mainly it had the least (or the easiest) homework lol

14. Dream job?

idk, I thought it was art but now every way that could go sounds like I’d hate it at some point lol - tbh I like what I do now, because it lets me do a lot of things the way I want to without being told what to do directly, and it involves a lot of organizing/categorizing which I really enjoy doing in general.

I don’t really want to do this specific job at this specific company for my whole life, but my dream job would be really similar to it I think

15. Eye colour?

Brown ^_^

----------------------------------------------------

Since I’m late to this I’m not gonna tag anybody, but feel free to jump on if you want!

[sistrrrenchantress]

6 Questions Tag Game

Thanks @dwellerinroots for the tag! I haven’t actually ever done one of these so here goes nothing.

1. Last Song?

Ughgh I think Malibu by Hole. I last listened to a podcast and I only use Spotify so I’m like 98% it was Malibu. Anyways I love that song. It’s hopeful and sad and when I was in high school I really wanted someone to whisk me away and we’d go live somewhere by the beach in like a van. You know like those kinda romantic, hazy dreams of van-life before you realize that it’s not realistic.

2. Last Show?

I was gonna say The Last of Us, but actually I watched Modern Family last night. TBH my partner likes TLoU a lot more than I do, but it’s got some scenes that melt my heart a bit. Anyways Modern Family always acts like a personal pick-me-up since it’s kinda nostalgic. Plus sometimes I wish my family was more like them. It also kinda helped me realize what wasn’t healthy about my own personal relationships and know that life goes on even if your family sucks sometimes so even if it’s a mess it kinda has helped me? Idk why I’m trying to explain myself here lmao. I had a class where everyone said it was problematic and I don’t want people thinking I agree with everything in the show or whatever.

3. Currently Watching?

I just finished watching Wakanda Forever so I think it counts since I started this before it ended lmao. Anyways I thought it was okay. Not good, but not terrible. But I also think it was closer to terrible than good. It just felt confused, like it didn’t know what message or arc Shuri was supposed to have so idk idk. I’m not a movie critic so… yeah

4. Currently Reading?

I’m still reading Hyperion. I know it’s been a month, but in my defense the blues have hit me like a truck and I’ve solely been focusing on keeping my GPA. I have one more short story left, which is the Consol’s. Also, I should’ve mentioned but it’s a collection of sci-fi short stories (Canterbury Tales style) taking place eons into the future after Earth has literally imploded. It follows a group of people brought together on a pilgrimage to travel to the mysterious Time Temple on the planet of Hyperion. There’s more but I really don’t wanna spoil anything for anyone who might want to read or was already planning. Anyways the priest’s tale is my absolute favorite, because I like it’s spooky vibe and other spoiler-filled reasons. However they’re all written really well and I would recommend this to just about everyone since I think it’s just a really fun read.

5. Current Obsession?

Oof I don’t really have one because I’ve been feeling down. However Cyberpunk 2077 was it for a while, then TES again, and I’m just floating now. Anyways I’m always interested in TES, the Witcher, Dragon Age, etc. It’s just not as intense as other people though. I feel kinda boring now. Well, at least I’ve been getting back into art and blender and messing around with trying to learn my father’s language again. And I love writing and creating generally so that’s really that.

6. Unrelated Stuff I’ve Been Doing?

I already talked about this a little I guess. I’m learning Polish again and watching more shows with the dub in Spanish so I don’t lose it since I just don’t talk to my family much anymore. I’ve been messing with blender and unreal engine. I re-started this art-schedule-thing that I got from a yt video. I really want to improve my digital art. I also have like 10 billion tabs open with videos on blender and unreal so maybe I’ll post what I’m working on one day. I kinda gave up on my NaNoWriMo because I’m too moody and I don’t know what’s wrong with my executive function but we haven’t been on the same page recently. However, listening to podcasts (like Unresolved Textual Tension or You’re Wrong About and Rotten Mango) has kinda helped my mood a little. But if I’m being real here, real life kinda takes up most of my time. So school (gotta love deciding for a dual degree really late in my undergrad) and all the volunteer/internship things I have to do kinda just take up most of my life. That’s a little depressing lmao, but it is what it is.

Anyways, thanks for the tag! I don’t feel like I’m active enough to tag anyone and I’m shy so anyone who sees and wants to do it, feel free.

[estrellami-1]

I listened to that song like 5 times back-to-back thinking about this the entire time. OP, I’m kissing your brain. I hope you like it.

~~~~~~~~~

Eddie looks like sin. He’s debauched. Eyes wide, chest heaving as he pants, sweat beading at his temples, hair wild and in his face, flushed down to his chest. He looks Steve directly in the eye as he speaks. “Thank you, Hideout!” He says, grinning wide, and right, they’re in public right now, Steve should maybe not be eye-fucking his boyfriend.

He tunes back in as Eddie takes a deep breath and holds it for a second before releasing it, his breathing coming easier. Steve smiles as he recalls the day he’d taught Eddie that trick. “Now, I know many of you might not think of our guest for this next song as being very metal, but forgive me this once. This man is very important to me. Took me in when I was a wee lad-“ here he adopts an absolutely atrocious Scottish accent which really just makes Steve fall in love with him even more, because God, his boyfriend is such a dork- “and raised me as his own. Not to mention he’s got the sickest skills I’ve seen in this podunk town of Bumfuck, Indiana. So, without further ado, please welcome my uncle, Wayne Munson!” He grins even wider and throws an arm behind him as Wayne emerges from the curtains, holding a fiddle.

“I didn’t need all that, boy,” Wayne grouses, but Steve can see the pleased flush to his cheeks, knows Eddie can see it too. Knows that Wayne knows they can see it.

“Alright, boys,” Eddie says, turning back to the small crowd that had gathered. “Hit it!” He slides his fingers down the strings of his guitar, using that as the opening for “The Devil Went Down to Georgia,” and then the drums kick in. Wayne raises the fiddle to his chin, waiting for his cue.

He starts a second later, fingers flying over the strings, bow moving so fast Steve’s almost scared it’ll break or start a fire, just from the friction. He’s good, really good, even Steve’s untrained ear can tell, and he grins and joins in when the crowd starts clapping to the beat.

Then Eddie starts singing, and even though it’s little more than rhythmic talking—he’d done more vocally-complex songs already that night—Steve was hooked. Then again, he was always hooked when it came to Eddie.

When it comes time in the song for the devil to play his fiddle, Eddie and Wayne play together, electric guitar and fiddle, fingers a blur as Eddie complements Wayne’s playing, the guitar somehow only adding to the fiddle.

Steve is awestruck. He’s heard Wayne play before—the tail end of slower songs—and he knows he is good, but to know he has this kind of talent, and to know that he and Eddie had practiced this… Steve is about four seconds away from stomping up onto the stage and pulling Eddie into a bruising kiss.

After the next verse, when it is Johnny’s turn to fiddle, Eddie lets Wayne have the spotlight, simply strumming complementary chords.

The crowd is going wild, and Steve is halfway there with them. Wayne adds on to the original song, a slight riff here and there, different, more complex-sounding fingering than the original. Steve is obsessed.

Far too soon, the song is over, and Steve slips to the back to congratulate Wayne as he walks off stage.

He grins and hands the man a glass of whiskey in exchange for the fiddle, carefully laying it in its case, smiling when Wayne groans about being too old for this shit.

“You say that every time, Wayne,” Steve reminds him. Wayne shoots him a rude gesture in return, and Steve laughs out loud.

A few minutes later, Eddie comes bounding into the back after their last song, pouncing at Wayne and wrapping his arms around his uncle’s torso. “Wayne! Holy shit, that was great, thank you so much! The crowd loved you!”

“Well of course they did,” Wayne mutters, but he looks pleased regardless.

“Eds,” Steve murmurs, gesturing him over with a flick of his head. When they’re standing in front of each other, he lets a grin fill his face as he leans forward to whisper into Eddie’s ear his exact plan for that night.

He delights in the shade of red Eddie turns, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek before cackling as he walks away.

Guitarist Eddie, nephew son of fiddler Wayne