#and they weren't that important for this story anyway

[autistichalsin]

Halsin Silverbough was born to be a daddy, not just because it helps heal him to be a family, but also because he knows better than anyone just how important it is for those orphans to have a new found family to rely on. He says it himself, "the Grove became my family, with Silvanus as my teacher. And now, I have you." But he combines this with an acknowledgement of his pain: "the wounds don't heal, but they become more bearable." "I hope [I am better off with you anyway. But I won't turn my back on the past- it made me who I am today."

Which to me is a good indicator that he won't expect, let alone be upset, if any of the children don't consider him a parent, just a guardian. He is delighted at the ones that do, but if there were some who said "I had parents, and you aren't them," I honestly don't think he'd mind as long as they weren't mean to himself or others. Mostly, he just wants to be a strong and steady presence in their lives, helping them to find their way, and while he is delighted if that comes in the form of parenthood, guardianship is just as good if that's what any of the children prefer.

And for the ones who do consider him Daddy Halsin, I think he'd be thrilled to slide into the role he's always wanted. He loves telling bedtime stories. It's probably his favorite part of his day. He also loves giving them rides- especially in bear form.

How many other things must just make him burst with happiness? Helping show the little ones that there's no monsters under the bed to be scared of- and then transforming into a bear to show that if there are any, he can scare them? Making up games for the little ones? Talking to the schoolteachers and hearing about their progress? Hearing about loose teeth and growth spurts? Watching babies teeth and take their first steps?

This is a man who will delight in literally every milestone taken by every member of the commune. He was BORN to be a dad.

[raleighrador]

Most fics I have read - even/especially the very good ones - that include Anakin having a relationship with Obi-Wan after Mustafar (or AUs where something similar to Mustafar occurred) are almost always frustrating to me. At least unsatisfying.

Anakin having any kind of positive relationship with Obi-Wan post Mustafar always seems to rely on a level of introspection and self awareness that frankly my head canon of Anakin is totally incapable of.

Anakin is not a forgiving person, even at his best. He is kind and generous but not forgiving. He remembers every slight (real or imagined). He holds onto those memories and lets them fester.

He also remembers all the good. He never forgets them. He cherishes them and polishes them and places them on a pedestal.

It's why (and a symptom of) he's so fucked in the head when it comes to his most important relationships.

He has no synthesised view of Obi-Wan or Padme or Palpatine or Luke. They are all of the things they have ever done to or been to Anakin.

What changes is the weighting Anakin gives to each of these things, with a massive recency bias.

I don't see how Anakin, in the full knowledge that Obi-Wan is the man who cut off his limbs, set him on fire, left him to burn, left him for Sidious to find, and then stole and separated his children before Padme's body was cold...

Could ever forgive him.

The why's and the intentions and who deserved what just wouldn't matter to (my head canon) of Anakin.

In lieu of self-awareness many fics give Anakin basically limitless self loathing. So instead of dealing with Obi-Wan or Padme or whatever he just hates himself so much that he doesn't have time to hate Obi-Wan anymore.

There is a lot I like about this (narratively/as entertainment) but I think the thing it misses is that is how Anakin worked prior to Mustafar anyway. He already hated himself almost limitlessly and he still found the time and energy to hate Obi-Wan.

After Mustafar he would have so much more justification for that hatred and resentment. So why would his self loathing get in the way?

The longer the timeline of these stories aligns to canon the more true this becomes.

I think by the time you get to Ghost Anakin at the end of ROTJ the things he would regret most are (in no particular order): choking Padme, handing Luke to the Emperor, torturing Leia, chopping off Luke's hand. MAYBE he regrets Alderaan but only in as much as it made Leia sad and means she hates him.

And he would likely blame everyone and anyone but especially Obi-Wan for this.

If Leia's surname was Skywalker, if they weren't separated, if Luke wasn't lied to about who Vader/Anakin was, if the Jedi hadn't filled Luke's head with lies and trained him as a weapon etc.

The rest of it? I just don't know that Anakin would really regret that much of it. I don't think he would see much difference - even with hindsight - between what he did as Vader in service of the Empire and what he did as Anakin in service of the Republic.

Killing the Jedi younglings probably sits in its own category. However, I maintain that Anakin would believe this was an acceptable price to save Padem IF it worked.

That might be his biggest regret - that none of it worked, that he lost Padme and his children anyway.

But any time travel force shenanigans where Vader uses the dark side to yeet himself into the past such that he can save Padme etc.

He would think that was a good deal.

There is the final (meta) element to all of this which is that Anakin's eventual forgiveness of Obi-Wan seems to generally function more as a narrative tool to assuage Obi-Wan's guilt, rather than some kind of real character development for Anakin.

And TBH I just want Obi-Wan to suffer/don't cate about him but that is another post.

I do however have sympathy for this - because I think Anakin is really, really hard to write.

A "redeemed" Anakin in my mind isn't one who suddenly becomes some kind of virtuous rules based utilitarian like the Jedi aspire to be, like Obi-Wan is.

A redeemed Anakin is one who chose his son, chose his family. A redeemed Anakin is one who was finally put in a position where choosing his family WAS the greater good. Anakin chose to save Luke - and kill Sidious - for the exact same reason and applying the exact same logic he applied to every other major choice he ever made.

And I don't see that Anakin as ever getting over what Obi-Wan did to him and his family. At best I see him not killing Obi-Wan because it would make Luke sad.

[gamebunny-advance]

Random Thought

So, a while back I posted a pic of all the Pokemon dudes that I like despite knowing basically nothing about Pokemon, and it's become a very shocking fact to me that despite their apparent popularity, the train dudes do basically nothing in their home game.

[solradguy]

Mr. Rad Guy, I've wanted to get your opinion on something for a while now, and finally snagged what I was looking for on twitter. I normally don't pay any of those transphobic Bridget discourse peddlers any mind, but they bring up her appearence in the canon pachinko game Vastege as supposed "proof" that Strive's story direction for her is a contradictory retcon. This game's plot takes place just three months before Xrd's, and they claim that through her voicelines she is still insisting sternly that she's a man and not to call her cute, but also that she STILL hasn't broken her village's superstition at this point in time. This is the only image they ever have as so-called evidence, so I wanted to see if you know if these lines are legitimately in the game, scrapped content, or made up altogether. I don't trust these lunatics as far as I can throw them when it comes to telling the whole truth 🤨

This screenshot is from same manuscript of dialog that is in the lore server archives and in the GG VXT archive pack that I compiled and uploaded to Archive.org. As far as I know, these lines were all used in the game and no unused lines have been (or even could be) datamined. Two of the lines here are highlighted so I'm assuming they're the ones these dorks are using to try to prove their point. I've translated them.

First line:

I want to break the village's rule/law*, and return to the village as a young man.

*In the official localizations I think they might translate this as "tradition" or "superstition" instead of rule or law.

"Young man" in that line is 男の子 (otokonoko). Do not let anyone convince you Bridget is using the other otokonoko there (男の娘；"young man with a feminine aesthetic"). They like to do that a lot, argue that it's the one that uses 娘.

Second line:

Cute is uncalled for... I'm a man.

In conclusion: Yes. Bridget is using almost 1:1 recycled dialog in Vastedge that she used in XX and the spinoffs. The Twitter grifters' Google Translating was correct this time.

Vastedge's plot may take place only 3 months before Xrd, but Vastedge itself came out in 2013—8 entire years before Strive released in 2021. A lot can change in 3 months in real life, but after almost a decade most people are entirely different altogether (wrt Daisuke and his plot decisions). Also it's a friggin pachislot machine lmfao Like, are people really expecting something as earth shattering as a character as irrelevant to the general plot like Bridget suddenly stopping all of the action to explore her identity on a slot machine? I have no patience for these people anymore. They're just stupid and arguing because they have no hobbies.

There's also the fact that Daisuke originally planned for Bridget to be a cis girl until the very last minute. So if anything her coming out in Strive was just returning to the starting concept. He mentions this in the interview in the back of Artworks of Guilty Gear X 2000-2004. Translation by fairymisao.

(27)---The character Bridget, introduced in Guilty Gear XX, looks like a girl but is actually a boy, right? What was your intention in deciding on creating this kind of character? Ishiwatari: The creation of Bridget as a boy happened at the very last second; during development I was drawing him as purely a girl. It's just that when there is a need to give a worldly backbone (to the game), in order for me to try to not forget each character, and in order to revive the character, I give them my very heart. As a result, the creation of Bridget as actually a boy instead of a girl was because I thought he could become my alter ego. [...]

It's also important to note that Vastedge was the first thing ASW made for Guilty Gear after getting the full rights to the IP back from Sega after the Sega-Sammy merger in 2011 (which they had started to lose a bit before Overture's release in 2004). They were absolutely more focused on making something that would generate income and looked flashy than they were a compelling cinematic experience.

[guqin-and-flute]

OKAY. I have been doing some really good blocks of writing over the past few weeks--like several sessions with ~2000 words. Unfortunately, a lot of it has been skipping around on different fics (I'm trying to be better about unhealthy sleep habits, so I'm not writing in huge, hyperfixated chunks. Or trying not to 😬).

So, if you would like, feel free to poke, request, remind so it stays on my conscious mind! Do not feel obligated, this is only if you feel the urge, it will get done either way!

[kareenvorbarra]

read the beginning of a popular book out of curiosity and something happened in the first few pages that made me realize it might be least For Me book ever written

[void-botanist]

Happy STS!

How do you structure your cast? Do you like throwing in a character as soon as there's an opening for one, or do you aim to reuse them as much as possible? Does your cast grow organically or is it a result of deliberate choices?

Many thanks for this (now well-aged) STS! It's such a funny question for me because the answer is yes.

I've made more of an effort lately to keep casts smaller and be more careful with them, but I love making characters and I seem to endlessly make side characters that don't always stay as much to the side as I intended. I also will sometimes reuse characters that in a previous version were doing something completely different, so I'm not making up a net new character, but I'm still adding someone new to the cast. But I guess in general the cast grows organically and then I say, wow how did I end up with this many lil guys in one story? Is this too much? And then I remember how soap operas work, where you're keeping track of storylines for like fifty different characters, and I say, nah this is fine. If it's too many you can cut some out later.

[francisforever2014]

i hate the term “female friendship” like it annoys me

[cheriafreya]

this was painfully slow to go through, please don't ever do this again Hoyo :_)

[wanderingandfound]

Yesterday, a few hours after I listened to the season twelve finale, I snapped at my father the same way he snaps at others in the family and he snapped back. We were both only mildly stressed. But we both hate to be talked to in that matter, so it just got worse and worse. I learned it from him, but I don't know how aware of that he is because nobody else mirrors him so well. My mom refuses to fight. My brother and sister..... I don't know. They don't seem to get in these situations. Sometimes I feel like I've inherited all of his bad parts and none of his good parts.

My father is not abusive. We both love each other very much. I am deeply aware of these flaws and like... I try to be better. Or at least I want to be better.

Wanting to be better is not enough.

Maybe my personal experiences are not relevant. As I said, this isn't abusive and even if it was we aren't talking about torture and premeditated bodily harm.

But reading everybody have a viscerally bad reaction because they think Kevin would never be his father? Would never subject his children to the abuse he went through?

Well, I don't feel like I've seen the character development from Kevin to make that a believable statement.

It takes a lot of work to make the worst parts of ourselves, the parts that come out under pressure, the parts that come out when you can't run away, the parts that come out when it matters, better than how we were raised.

Or maybe I'm just making excuses for my bad behavior.

[celestial-kestrel]

It's that time of year again where Mari Lwyd starts to be talked about and shared around and an INCREDIBLY misleading post gets shared a lot. As someone who grew up with Mari Lwyd I wanted to clear some things up.

Also hello, if you are unaware who Mari Lwyd is. This is about the Welsh tradition of the horse skull who visits houses during the Christmas to New Years period in Wales asking for alcohol.

First off and probably the most important one:

Mari Lwyd is not a cryptid!

I can not emphasise this enough. She. Is. Not. A. Cryptid. There is no story or mystery about a ghost or zombie horse roaming the Welsh valleys. She's not even supposed to be a ghost or a zombie. It's just a horse skull on a stick with a guy under a sheet. She's a hobbyhorse and a folk character used to tell Welsh stories and keep songs alive. When people spread the misinformation that she's a cryptid, it's the equivalent of saying Kermit the Frog is a cryptid.

She is actually only one character in a wider cast of characters who go door to door or, in more modern times, pub to pub. The cast of characters can change town to town and village to village but there are some common ones I see time and time again. The Leader, the Merryman, The Jester and The Lady are just some I see regularly. Punch and Judy used to be more popular a few years ago but I haven't seen them in a while as their tradition has mostly fallen out of popularity. In most cases, almost the whole cast will be played by men. Even the characters are considered and referred to as female. Though this again depends and varies by which group is partaking in the Mari Lwyd tradition.

This point also goes onto my second point,

Mari Lwyd does not rap.

I think this comes from a very common misunderstanding of what rap is vs spoken word. Rap is a very specific style of music originating from the African American communities of the USA and has it's own structure and motifs unique to it. It's a lot more complex than people give it credit for as a style of music and just flippantly assign anything similar to it as being rap. If someone is talking fast or reciting poetry, it is not rap. Or anything that is an exchange of words between two people is not a rap battle. Mari Lwyd does not do rap, actually something that gets left out of these posts is the fact Mari Lwyd does not even speak. It's actually the Leader, who does all the speaking and song based banter between the house/pub owner for entry. Mari Lwyd just clicks her mouth, bites people and bobs her head around.

I think Mari Lwyd is a really beautiful and unique part of Welsh culture. She's not actually as wildly celebrated as a lot of the posts make her out to be. Actually, I think most Welsh people themselves learn about Mari Lwyd through the internet as well. Her popularity is increasing thanks to the drive of local groups wanting to keep the traditions alive and a renewed desire to document Welsh traditions before they're gone. Which is why it's such a shame that she's turned into something she's not to earn horror points on the internet. I think this is why it bothers me so much to see the misunderstandings of the culture and the folk tradition. Mari Lwyd's origin is very hot debated as well as how long it's been going on for. But I think it's thanks to a lot of traditions like this that the Welsh language and our stories weren't lost forever. Welsh culture is recovering as is the language. But it's still in a very fragile place. I think it's why it's important to document and correct information when it's spread.

Anyway, if you want to see the tradition in action, here's a lovely video from the Cwmafan RFC going to one of the pubs for charity. It includes the song exchange with the pub owner for entry and the whole pub singing and joining in once Mari Lwyd and the rest are inside.

As well with another video from St Fagan's showcasing the more traditional and door to door form with the larger cast.

[neverendingford]

.

[boilingrain]

I’m almost completely done with the allegiances for Floodwaters but I have run into a small problem

So I decided to have one Main/POV character in each clan and I’ve already decided the POV characters of Thunderclan, Shadowclan and Windclan (Hawktail, Blackberrynose and Snowfeather respectively) but I can’t decide which Riverclan cat should be the POV character

With the other POV characters, I decided while writing down notes about their personalities that I wanted to show things through their eyes. I didn’t really go into this with plans about specifically who would be the main characters (since the main characters from the original version, After the Flood, have been deleted from existence because the original draft of the story with the allegiances was lost when I moved computers and Minnow is really the only remaining character from the original because I forgot everybody else)

I’m considering Aspennose but idk

[visenyaism]

jaehaerys administration dashboard simulator

🫧maidenpooled Follow

listen i know all kingsguard are bastards but jonquil darke put a cigarette out on me. i think i huave shivers

♟️redwhine

ok bootlicker. you know what she did

🫧maidenpooled Follow

boots not the only thing id lick

🌸queencrowned Follow

this could literally be me and my brother if it weren't for my bitch mom trying to send me to the other side of the fucking continent

🍒saerious

GIRL STAND UP

🤎bowlofbrown

doctrine of exceptionalism meatriders when someone asks them why 75% of dragonstone is blonde and me and half of flea bottom have gleaming amethyst eyes and/or beautiful delicate cheekbones

🥀maegorwife Follow

that's different...targaryens are literally divinely ordained by the seven to rule because they're stronger and better than us...that's why they have the dragons it is in their sanctified valyrian blood

🩸knifeinthedark

SO TRUE...THEY WANT TO ABOLISH THE RIGHT TO FIRST NIGHT BECAUSE OF WOKE. AND YET THEY STILL DO IT. BUT NO ONE CAN SAY ANYTHING ANYMORE OR THOSE GENDER-NEUTRAL DRAGONS WILL BURN YOUR KEEP DOWN

🤎bowlofbrown

cannot stand this fucking website. spending my last silver stag on tyroshi blue hair dye im not going to be associated with you people.

🍒saerious

oh so when maegor has seven wives he’s “aegon’s true son” and “cool” but when i have three boyfriends suddenly im a “whore”

🫀lustywench Follow

op i support you but they did call him “the cruel” for that it was a very important part of the story that he was in fact maegor “the cruel”

🌟sevenpointedstar

🌗maidensgrace

doing all of this with a FAITH OF THE SEVEN URL...girl you better pick a hell and start hoping

#bring back the faith militant

❄️theythemderly

hey isn’t it weird that so many of the king’s children have suddenly and mysteriously died lately. under the care of the maesters. what if they’re planning something…,

🕯️glasscandled

ugh i wish🙄 speed that shit up fr

🥵ullerscorpion

likes charge reblog cast

😈themarcherrrrrr-deactivated5699

me when im in a being dead combination and my opponents are jaehaerys' whole army of childraeyn of the corn

🙌fleabottomtop

yoooooooo theyre quarrelling again.

🙌fleabottomtop

alysanne targaryen if you're reading this i could change your life just give me one chance let me hit

🙌fleabottomtop

there are gold cloaks outside of my house

⚔️errantmaid Follow

kingsguard dick is good as fuck when you don't have a motherfucker in your ear saying it violates a sacred vow made in the eyes of the king and the seven😜

⚔️errantmaid Follow

the king chopped it off and sent him to the wall i fucking hate this place can't have SHIT in king's landing

🏵️floriansjonquil

hey has anyone seen princess gael. it's been literal months and she seems to have up and disappeared with no official announcement from the palace? would be the third female relative to go missing in the king's custody after aerea and saera....

🐝beeeeeeeeeeeeesbury Follow

damn that's crazy. im sure shes fine though anyways i'm a big fan of this new road the king built theres a lot of nice new roads does anyone else like the roads

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

day 18262 of not fighting the brackens. this is boring as fuckkkkk what am i supposed to do. pretend to care about the triarchy?

🐎brackennation

kill yourself

🐦‍⬛cloakedinfeathers Follow

192.158.1.38. doxxed. get your dumbfuck horse breeder knights ready because our strongest and noblest raven warriors are on the way to your nasty ass keep right now bitch

[daydreamerwoah]

Love Through It All Pt. 5

tw: mentions of cheating, mentions of divorce, hurt, angst, rollercoaster of emotions, sadness, therapy/counseling, violence and abuse (talk of y/n past relationship)

Read Part 1 for author notes for the beginning of this story if this is your first time here.

When it came time for your next therapy session with the chaplain, you were nervous. It was the first individual session you were attending, and god did you want to throw up from the anxiety.

Simon had asked you several time in the days leading up to the appointment what day and time were you had to go, but you refused to tell him. You didn't want him to be there when you went in... but somehow you knew he would figure it out anyway.

You weren't surprised when you walked in the building and saw him standing there waiting in the lobby. You couldn't help but roll your eyes as she walked up to you like a skiddish cat.

"What? Think I wasn't gonna show or something?" you bitterly asked.

"No. Just wanna make sure you didn't have any issues getting here."

Issues getting here. You weren't stupid.... well maybe staying with him you might have been.... but you knew your husband. The issues that he meant was if nobody bothered you. But it went deeper than that.

Simon began noticing your new clothes the day after you bought them. He came home from work before you, so when your feet walked through the front door of the apartment, he immediately heard the soft clicks of your heels on the hardwood floor before you took them off. His head turned as you walked past the living room, offering a brief hello before continuing into the bedroom. He saw your outfit, and he found himself swallowing the lump in this throat.

He was a soldier after all - an SAS soldier at that. He was trained to pick up on things.. and he certainly picked up on the change in your wardrobe. He also picked up on the makeup you wore. You'd gone from wearing barely any to having smokey eyes with a dark lip color every time you left the house. He was afraid to admit it, but he was worried. For all he knew, you might have started seeing someone at work, and he wouldn't have a clue who it was. It wasn't like he met your coworkers before, other than Ava.

So that's why he stood there, waiting for you to arrive at your session. He would have broken a man's jaw if he found them eyeing his wife like she was a piece of meat... especially because of what you had on too.

"I didn't," you sighed, making your way to walk past him.

Before you could, he stopped you, gently grabbing your hand and lightly squeezing it, "Let me know when you're done yeah?"

You nodded, pulling your hand away before walking down the hall to Lt. Jones's office.

Therapy.... something that made you feel queasy when you thought about it. But there you were, sitting on the couch in the man's office as he wrote notes about the previous topic you spoke on - your childhood. It wasn't that interesting, certainly not worthy of discussing, you thought, but according to him, it was important.

"Can we talk a little bit about your previous relationship? Before your husband?" He asked.

The way you paused and tensed, Jones knew he hit a sore spot. But it had to be done. His soft gaze remained on you as you looked at everything but him. The floor, the wedding ring on your finger, the ceiling, the wall.... anything. But when he continued to give you time, you let out a shaky sigh before nodding.

"What do you want to know?" you asked.

"Whatever you're comfortable with.... but how about you tell me how you found out that he cheated yeah?"

Shit.

You closed your eyes, thinking back to that time in your life when everything felt confusing. When you didn't even know if you'd make it to the next day.

"I-I went through his phone," you started, "I didn't mean to, though. I was plugging it in to charge, and a text came through from some girl saying she had a great time with him," Nervously rubbing your hands on your pants, the chaplain encouraged you to take breaks if you needed, but you shook your head "I was curious... so I opened the phone and that's when I saw the messages."

Jones wrote in his notepad before looking back at you, "Then what happened?"

"I woke him up... he was taking a nap. But I woke him up. I started screaming at him and showing him the messages," You opened your eyes, tears forming, "My ex was a dick... didn't care about anything in life except for himself. He did drugs. Hard drugs. And it was toxic.. our relationship. I should have seen the signs in the beginning... but.. I didn't. When I woke him up, I didn't think things would get so bad, but they did. He didn't even think twice before he punched me.... I just remember falling to the ground before he kneeled over me and punched me over and over. Next thing I knew..... I woke up in the ER."

You wanted to tell the chaplain to not look at you the way he did. The sad look in his eyes. The pity. Even if he was remaining professional, he couldn't hide the fact that he felt sorry for you to have gone through what you did. And by the look on your face as you kept trying to fight back the tears, he knew what his next question had to be.

"And you stayed with him after that... didn't you?"

A choked sob left your throat as you put your head in your hands, "Y-yes. I had nowhere to go. I didn't have anyone I could turn to. So I stayed.... I stayed until I saved up enough money to get the fuck out of there."

By now, Jones had removed his eyeglasses from his face and set them down on the table next to him. "It's why you're afraid to stay with him isn't it?"

Goddamn he was reading you like an open book. Even though it was his job to do so.

"Yes," you sniffled, "But I know.. I know he won't hurt me. I know that. But I can't help but be afraid... I can't help but think about my ex and what I went through."

A moment went by as Jones wrote more in his notepad before he spoke, "Mrs. Riley... I know it's terrifying to feel like the past will come back again to you. But I don't think that's the case here." You wanted to believe him, you really did. But it was scary to think that. "I'll see both of you in a couple of days. I want you to think about everything that you've told me today... but I also want you to think about everything I've said yeah?"

You nodded as you tried to wipe your face with the tissues he'd given you before the session started. After pulling yourself together a bit more, you left out of his office and made your way to the exit. A part of you thought Simon would have waited in the lobby for you to be finished, but you were relieved to find the place empty. When you got to your car, you sent a quick text to Ava telling her you were on your way to work. You thought about texting Simon as well, but you decided to do it when you got to work... eliminating the opportunity for him to ask you any further questions.

************************************************************************

Simon was a nervous wreck.. so were you, rightfully so. The last couple of days had you both on edge. Neither one of you talked about your individual sessions when you saw each other at home. He thought about asking you, he wanted to so bad. But Lt. Jones gave him his homework - don't bother you about the session. Give you the space you need in the house. That worried your husband so much he hadn't slept hardly in the past 48 hours.

Even though Pvt. Williams was now gone, he still had to stay at work a bit late at times.. especially the past two days, as Taskforce 141 was gearing up to go on another mission soon. When he came home, you were fast asleep.. thankfully in the bed. He would stare at you, thinking about everything. He did that a lot.. more so after his individual session. He thought about when he first met you, about when he asked you to marry him, even about when he kissed you the first time.

But he also thought about how now every time you looked at him, he could see the puffiness in your eyes. He thought about how you were starting to change right in front of him... the outfits becoming more..... sexy? Revealing? He couldn't figure out the word for it. But while he loved the way you dressed... he wanted to know why you changed. Well, no... he knew why. He fucking knew why you were changing. But he didn't want you to stray away from him, as selfish as that was.

Once more, you fidgeted on the couch while Simon sat up straight on his side of it. Lt. Jones wrote a few lines in his notepad before he straightened his eyeglasses and glanced towards both of you. "Thank you for being here. It's about the stepping stones yeah?" He grinned. He was trying to ease the tension, and it worked... a little. "Today... let's discuss the word why."

Oh no.

Why?

"What'd y'mean?" Simon asked first.

The chaplain cleared his throat, "I want you to tell each other why... Lieutenant.. your wife deserves to know why you cheated on her. Why you didn't tell her-" he turned his attention to you, "-Mrs. Riley, if you can... let him speak. Get everything out in the open."

That word... why. It was about to send into a panic attack.

It felt like an eternity before Simon said anything. Before he told you the full story. You grabbed the box of tissues before he was even halfway into it, and god, did you break down in tears. Simon tried to reach out to you, but you weakly slapped his hands away, ushering the chaplain to command that he didn't try to touch you again. So he continued... leading up to the point where he explained - in so many words - about how sex with her was different than it was with you.

And fuck was that the last straw.

"You never even asked me if I would be into that Simon!" you yelled.

"Mrs. Riley-" Lt. Jones tried to stop you, but you didn't.

"You fucked her again and again because she like it rough? You never even asked me to try it with you! You wanted to take out your frustrations... why not with me? I-I'm your wife, Simon! I can be your slut, too... anytime you want it. How you want it. You-" a choked sob escaped, "-you never even tried to talk to me about it. About anything."

Simon's eyes widened a little at the realization of how truly fucked up he had become. The chaplain's eyes - while somewhat remaining unfazed - he felt just a tad bit awkward at your choice of words in response to why your husband had cheated on you. "Let's come back to that later yeah?" He quickly changed the topic. "Mrs. Riley... can you tell your husband why you are having this battle between your thoughts of divorcing him and staying with him."

Crying still, you tried to get the words out as best as you could, "B-because I'm a fucking idiot. I should leave... but no.. I-I want to work on my marriage like-like an fucking idiot. We need to get a divorce."

"No," Simon jumped in. "Love, please-"

"I can't do this," you cried.

Before you tried standing up from the couch, the chaplain asked you to sit; to work through your feelings before letting them control you. Simon watched you with tearful eyes as you tried to calm down, but he was on the verge of breaking down himself.

By the time the session came to an end, you two left with more homework to do - think of a special moment in your marriage and you'd talk about it the next time you met Jones individually. You tried to run out of there, but of course, Simon pulled you into a secluded area, trapping you between him and the wall as he looked at your red eyes.

"Simon, I have to go to work."

"Love, listen to me... I'm so fuckin' sorry," he said, voice cracking a little.

That made you stare into his dark eyes, seeing the redness in them as he stared back into yours. Simon hardly cried, you had only seem him look sad.. but never cry; truly cry. Yet you caught the lone tear fall from his eye before disappearing behind his mask.

You tried to leave, "I can't do this."

"I should have talked to you. I should have told you how I felt-"

"But you didn't," you cut him off. "Why are we doing this? Why won't you divorce me? You can be happy with her-"

He didn't even let you finish that thought, "I want you. Only you." he retorted, voice thick with anger and desperation, "She's gone. I made sure of that. I don't want a divorce from you."

"What do you mean she's gone?" your eyebrows drawing together.

He sighed, "I got her transferred out. You.. nor me... will ever see her again."

His words weren't making any sense, yet all the sense in the world. He got her to leave? For you? For your marriage?

"Why?" you whispered.

"Because I wanna make this right sweetheart. You're the only woman I want. God I know it sounds like I'm lying, but I mean it."

Torn. That's what you were. Torn between believing him and wanting to get away from him.

"I have to get to work Simon. We can talk about this later," you said.

He didn't want to, but he stepped back allowing you to leave him standing there staring at the wall. He could only hope that you'd want to talk about it when he got off work.

I just want to say THANK YOU to all the likes, comments, and messages! I'm so glad you all are enjoying my story. I know it's a sad one :(

Taglist: @kalypsoox @kylies-love-letter @xrosegoldwolfx @linaaaaa654 @jessicab1991

[et6rnalsun]

LET ‘EM KNOW, chris sturn

𝜗𝜚 pairing: chris sturn x fem! reader

warnings: 18+ smut, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it up) literally js sex, chris being rough as always, slightly toxic! reader & toxic! chris

posted this cuz i needed to post something so here u go sum freaky smut. there’s a small time skip directly to the sex, hope it’s clear

your relationship with chris was complicated — and it couldn't even be called that.

something unfinished, that neither of you wanted to end. something that you had to let go but were too attached and dependent to the toxicity of the entire thing. you fucked, argued, argued while you fucked. it was a cycle that repeated itself, threats of never seeing each other again and then ending up in each other's bed with sinful moans escaping from swollen lips.

you weren't a jealous person, never been, especially towards him. you knew perfectly well he fucked other girls and pride ate you up completely before you could make a scene or something. but there was one of his hoes in particular, who made your hands tingle with the desire to beat her ass, that kept hanging around on him as if he was hers.

you fought the urge to nibble on your freshly manicured nails as you stared at that photo posted on his instagram story, their faces too close for your liking, clearly laying in his bed. so, you didn't think twice before clicking on his number, calling him. you waited one ring, two rings, and at the third he finally answered, his raspy voice saying your name slurredly.

"can you come over?" you asked shortly, getting straight to the point as you sat on the edge of your bed. chris sighed, knowing where you were going with this. "i'm busy right now, i think you know that"

"do you think i care? drop this bitch, chris, we both know you're dying to come here anyway" you huffed, not caring in the slightest that maybe you sounded too cocky. then your voice took on a more pleading tone, trying to get to him. "please, i need you. i’m not even kidding"

you could practically hear him wavering, his silence the answer you needed while you were already smiling in victory. "i'm coming. i fucking hate you" and hang up.

you then stood up, walking to the bathroom as you changed out of your underwear into his favorite thong, a smirk on your glossy lips the whole time. you had won, as always. you had confirmed that chris couldn't even resist you and your sweet voice of yours that begged him so subtly.

you didn't care if you sounded pathetic, or if you wouldn't do it for any other man anyway. you wanted him and had him again.

and then you didn't care even more as your fingers continued to pull the long curls of his hair to draw him closer to your neck, already tortured by marks and hickeys. your other hand gripping the crumpled sheets of your bed due to the inhuman rhythm of his thrusts. your moans were like music to his ears, especially after not hearing them for so long.

the tight, pink thong you had worn a few minutes before his arrival had been thrown to the floor without the slightest importance or care, like the rest of your clothes, only that one had been completely torn by chris's fucking impatient hands.

“you're such a needy slut,” he murmured through gritted teeth, one of his hands resting on your neck to keep you still. "you couldn't stand the fact that i was with someone else, huh? admit it" to those last words he added a thrust that hit right in that sweet spot, making you whimper.

“shut the fuck up” you managed to breathe out, your thighs tightening around him as you were desperate to reach your orgasm. "you didn't even - ah- didn't even hesitate to come here, didn’t you?”

he tightened his grip on your neck, lifting one of your thighs onto his shoulder with his other hand as he groaned. "fuck you" small beads of sweat had formed on his forehead at that point. “no one, no one has a pussy as fucking tight as yours” he felt like your walls were about to snap him in half, his eyes nearly rolling into the back of his head. "you drive me so crazy"

your moans had increased, feeling that pressure starting to persist more and more. “admit it” you whimpered, your long nails scratching his back as your arched yours slightly in pleasure. "admit that no one is like me"

his lips had found your bare shoulder, his teeth digging and biting into the sensitive skin as he whispered and moaned shamelessly into it. "no one makes me feel like you do, ma, i would gladly die inside this pussy if i could."

and you're cumming around him the minute the words leave his lips.