#and they were so scrunkly and silly and i loved them but now no more

[the-incorrect-quotes-show]

Update: bloodmoon is back and he has a knife

also he can drive now

well they cant do that now th eyre fucking dead

[kuroneko1815]

The maze scene but make it silly and with innuendos

Because I always make fun of Callisto being the one to instigate the silly, I want Penelope to do it this time. This came about after re-reading that scene when they first meet and I thought… what could she say differently that was just so silly. With help from @eloise175, also… we really shouldn’t be left alone together.

Callisto holding a sword to Penelope’s throat looking menacing and mocking: Why do you love me? Go on, tell me why you fell in love with me?

Penelope: Because you’re shiny!

Callisto freezes in shock: Shiny? (He’s been called many things, most of them weren’t good but never shiny!)

Penelope thinking back to her reputation: I like shiny things and your hair looks like spun gold and your eyes look like rubies.

Callisto: ??? (Just stares at her, sword steady and level as he tries to process what happened.)

Penelope internally: Oh thank god, I can escape now. (Tries to back away subtly but is foiled.)

Callisto: What else?

Penelope thinks back to all the stereotypical western teenagers and in Korea from her world and time, all those things she studied to fit in with her new classmates at university: You’re hot.

Callisto: I’m what?

Penelope: You have a handsome face and probably a fine body under those clothes from all the training you do. It makes me drool just thinking about it and I want jump you. (Penelope in her mind: maybe I should just die, it would be better if he killed me now.)

Callisto: … (Callisto.exe has crashed; please reboot)

Callisto tries to save face: It seems more like you’re in lust with me, rather than in love.

Penelope: Is there a difference right now? I haven’t talked to you, and I’ve only seen you in passing. Love and lust are the same right now.

Penelope: Also, your voice is fine and smooth like butter.

Callisto: I don’t understand?

Penelope: It means I like your voice, it’s nice and seductive. (Penelope eyes possible exists and just keeps saying things without thinking them through.)

Penelope: You’re such a babygirl

Callisto: Did you just call me a babygirl? (Now he does feel some indignation)

Penelope: Yes I did, you know, you’re so good looking I just wanna take care of you. You’re so scrunkly.

Callisto: What does that even mean? I think you’re just making up words.

Penelope: Scrunkly, an animal or creature that’s weird or unorthodox but still so cute.

Callisto: Did you just… just call me an animal?

Penelope: Well, if you’re an animal, I think mating season has come. (Penelope is dead, very dead. She can feel her soul leaving her body with each word she says and yet she can’t stop. Still, she’s resorted to dropping innuendos in hopes that he’d be so weirded out that he’d walk away without killing her.)

Callisto is shook. He knows the adopted daughter of Eckhart was crazy but not this crazy or wanton… and yet… it was appealing and exciting.

Penelope gestures to his pants: Well, I don’t much care for the sword at my neck, but you can definitely pierce me with the one down there any time. Think of me like something to conquer. (Abort, abort, abort. She thinks desperately. Shut up.)

Despite her wishes, her mouth keeps moving, and not towards rationality, it just prolongs her torture. Death by beheading wasn’t so bad, at least she’d stop talking.

Penelope: If someone asked me what I wanted for dinner, it’s you. I’m so hungry, I want a taste.

Callisto eyes her in shock. These were not words that should be coming out of a Lady’s mouth, he didn’t think he’d ever heard phrases come out of anyone’s mouth before. It was bawdy without actually being too vulgar. He wants to be offended, he really does, but…

Penelope: Please? I’m thirsty, can I have a sip? Just a sip, please? I promise I don’t bite… much. (Penelope internally: Can I turn on that damned game system now? Please?)

Penelope: If we got stuck in a closet, one of us would be walking out pregnant, and it wouldn’t be me.

Eventually, Callisto lets her go, too surprised and shook to actually process everything, especially the last part because that wasn’t possible at all, unless she was a powerful mage. And Penelope leaves no worse for wear, except her dignity, that died a traitor’s death.

-

-

BONUS: The Cave Scene: Or Callisto gives his rebuttals because you can damn well know that he’s not letting this go and it’ll live rent free in his mind. And she’s avoided him when he tried to press her for more coherent answers, had even neglected to reply to him.

Penelope waking up in the cave: GAHH!!! Why are you naked? (Covers her eyes)

Callisto: Why are you covering you’re eyes? You wanted to see what was under my clothes anyway, and I hope it doesn’t disappoint. You certainly didn't.

Penelope: You… you shameless pervert.

Callisto: Oh? I'm the pervert now? What happened to the audacious woman who kept saying such filthy things to me to seduce me?

Penelope stares at him with a look of disbelief.

Callisto: Oh? How could you be so cold to me? Aren’t I scrunkly? Aren’t I your babygirl?

Penelope: … I'm going back to sleep.

Penelope can't actually sleep and keeps having flashbacks to it, Callisto hugs her, and tells her the story. And the conversation proceeds the same. Except instead of asking her what she liked about him…

Callisto: So, is your assessment correct, Princess?

Penelope: What?

Callisto: Is my body as 'fine' as you thought? Am I really that hot?

Penelope without thinking: Yes (Realizes what she said and blushes and buries her face into his chest and then almost dies of embarrassment when she realizes what she just did)

Callisto: It certainly seems like it based on how you're reacting.

Penelope: …

Callisto: My sword is ready for the piercing and the conquests.

Penelope bites her lips unable to say anything because he’s responding to everything she’s saying. She realized he’s pulled the ultimate reverse uno on her, and weeks after the fact too.

Callisto: Are you hungry? We can have a small snack if you want. But why stop at a sip and a taste? Let’s make this into a full meal!

Penelope: …

Callisto: Perhaps my voice alone can get you ready, we’d need to mop up after we’ve spilled our drinks.

Penelope admits to herself that he does have an amazing voice. But she’s still refusing the temptation. She wants to live thank you very much.

Callisto: We’re both still overdressed it seems. We really need to read the invitations carefully. This cave has a zero clothing policy.

Penelope tries to shut him up, when he stops her from slapping him, she kisses him which was the wrong move, or maybe it was the right one? Because it eventually devolved.

Callisto when they finally stopped: Respectfully, Emperor Claudius himself couldn’t pull me out of you. (Callisto thinks of his famous ancestor, an accomplished general, who had a story about a sword in a stone who won the throne over his half brother.)

In the aftermath, Penelope would wake up in a tangle of limbs, naked, and very well ‘conquered’ by the Crown Prince. She also gets to live, survives the game and all. And… exactly nine months after that night, a little dragon like girl was born to them. They named her Judith.

But Callisto, the new Emperor had one last thing to say to his wife as they hold their new born later not even minutes after she’s handed to them: Well, it wasn’t exactly locked in a closet, but I wasn’t the one who walked out of there pregnant.

Penelope smiles sweetly at him, motions for him to come closer so she can kiss him. He leans forward eagerly, closes his eyes. Penelope taking advantage of it, shifts Judith in one hand and slaps him hard.

[thehistoriangirl]

my mexican twin.... I DEMAND MORE LATINX READER X VIKTOR!! (politely) i think its just fun to see representation even in lil silly fics hehe

TWINSIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I SUMMON YOU!!!!!

For now I have some headcanons I would love to write into fics but I haven't had the inspiration to do it as prettily as I wish to 😭😭 I hope you like them 💛💛💛

Okay so the headcanons:

Viktor x Latinx gn!Reader (SFW)

TW: These are Mexican-related (bc I'm Mexican lol), but some can apply to different Latin cultures! :3

He DEFS gains a few pounds once you two start dating

Like either because YOU feed him (sometimes against his will bc he's """soooooo busy""" (shoving him a torta de milanesa during his lunchtime)

Or because YOUR FAMILY feeds him once you present him over. Imagine your cool grandma/cool aunt inspecting it with 😱😱😱😱 faces because MY MAN IS SO SCRUNKLY. It's a family's duty to up some pounds on those bones

And he enjoys to be being pampered you know, I imagine him like the classic "Oh but I'm full already 🥺" when you put another bowl full of pozole in front of him, and then he says he's only eating it for peer pressure around the table--but that's. a LIE!!!!

Yall can't tell me he doesn't get a round bump after a particularly yummy party. He's like starting to doze off on the table like a baby after eating his fourth tamal during your cousin's XV años.

Even if at night he's like 🥺🥺🥺 "my love my tummy hurts" (for the spice, idk why i headcanon he can get gastritis really easily lkfhjdklfjf) and here it goes the milk remedy winkwink

Also pan de dulce 👀👀👀 he falls in love with pan de dulce istg, and he can eat it with milk????? sign him the fuck up. The same with pastel de tres leches

Also he starts to mumble songs in bad Spanish--an idea @apuwu had talked with me over Discord before JKDJHDFJKFJH. My man is just vibing without knowing the grisly lyrics behind a seemingly happy tune

But you prefer not to tell him because he just looks so adorable mumbling it mindlessly while working <3333

He doesn't dance much bc his legs hurt if he keeps putting pressure on it during too long, but you can definitely coarse him into dancing one or two.

Otherwise he just likes to watch you dance, even if you don't really know how to/are a lil bit clumsy. You look very happy dancing with your family/friends that he gets smitten all over again

He's kinda scarred for life once he saw kids breaking a piñata during one of your nephews' birthdays & un bolo during a baptism (where the hosts throw money so the guests could pick it up) (iykyk)

He started to watch telenovelas by mistake. Like maybe you were watching one or just putting it like white background noise while doing something else.

And at first he was like 🙄🙄🙄 "if the characters would do X thing or Z, this problem would be easily resolved/this problem wouldn't exist", and you tell him that it is for the 💥d r a m a💥

As it happened to the best of us when you're hanging out in the living room and your mom is watching a telenovela---Viktor just gets HOOKED. He doesn't know when it happened or how but he is invested

Sometimes you arrive home from a date with your friends and find Viktor and Jayce watching a telenovela on the couch

[For context, in my lil derange mind, in a contemporary AU Jayce is Latino. No i will not elaborate thank you]

He helps you make the Día de Muertos ofrenda <3333 he just loves to gets all craftsty and he's so interested about the concept that he even brings a photos of his passed family members. May even cook something they liked to put it in there alongisde yours :3

For now that's all! I hope to make some short fics with these soon! Like during Independence's Day KDJFDJKFJHF <3

[lucabyte]

your ocs!!!!! please ramble about them!!!!

i love your art so much

(GRABS YOU) H. CAN DO BOSS.

So ! My ocs. I guess I'll do an overall explainer for the overall groups. If you check out my Toyhouse (LINK!) there's a bunch of folders up top that are how I categorise them. It's primarily by universe except for the folders that are just "misc."

So folder 1: Blatant favouritism:

These are silly little guys that don't fit in any specific wider universe, but I really really like. So I'll spotlight the two important ones before i get real in the weeds with my main universe.

In here are notably, my Fursona (self explanatory), Ali and Pittsburgh Cincinnati. There's also Hauntkit and Clearpelt who are warriorcats ocs that *is dragged away by airport security*

... So, Pittsburgh, lovingly sometimes called pissbug, is a weird little Thing who I made as like, an homage to characters like happy bunny and Sweetypuss. She (and her weird dog) exist to stand next to strange and offputting captions. I love her. No further context. She's just silly. and violent.

Now. Ali.

Ali Alighieri has thoroughly stolen the show, and also ties into the next folder along, Making Your MK.

With over a hundred extra images compared to second place (Sorry, Tabitha). Ali is my fucked up little scrunkly. My little baby guy. They're a shared character of mine and @samhainian's, and is from their Creature Feature setting (A modern fantasy setting wherein Cryptids and Magic are real but in our modern world.) They are as such, a modern human young adult... Who is also a demon + magic user.

Strange little pansexual altersex genderqueer poetry-nerd that they are... The modern setting also means they are literally just a tumblr user. A fellow countryman, so to speak.

HOWEVER.... Ali's true origin was in *Purrgatorio*, a scrapped visual novel of mine set in the MYMK universe! They were simply retrofitted into CF as the joke with Purrgatorio was that a regular human had mysteriously just shown up in MYMK's pure-furry setting.... And then when we scrapped the project we got all attatched to our little not-so-blank-slate protagonist. But I'll put a pin in Purrgatorio for later.

Making Your MK.

(Guest of honour: My super unfinished website <3)

Okay so here's the big one. The setting with.... (looks at spreadsheet) 109 characters not including so-called incidentals. At time of writing.

MYMK is home to... Multiple stories. As you would hope when a setting has 100+ characters. I'd wager each story has about 10-20 relevant characters tops but with a big shared universe like this there gets to be overlap between casts!!! Yay !!! 😊😊😊

MYMK is the name of the main story in the setting. Pronounced "Making your Mark", it is centered around Markus Felidae (The purple one) and their family. It's very action-adventure-y. It's also the plot I'm most secretive about the backend of since I WILL!!!!! Turn it into a nice prose story with pictures SOMEDAY!!!!! But for now tee hee hee secrets secrets. Markus' family is strange and ragtag and is keeping something from them... I can't ramble on too long here unless further prompted in asks about specifics but!!! Everyone in the MYMK folder has a fully furbished little profile with a blurb about them. So if you're curious....

But yeah, I tend to think of the MYMK setting more in terms of its Locations than its Casts, due to the overlapping nature of them all. The Malbranche may be the villains of the main plot, but they're also major players in relation to The Palsgrave who are the antagonists of Moraine, etc etc,

The country everything in MYMK is set in is called New Orphidian, Southern hemisphere little thing, here's a very cartoony map of it.

Um. Cliffside!

Since it's the best map I have... Here's an exclusive sneak peek of a Zine I'll be getting back to once the fandom brain cools down a bit.... :3c

(... I REALLY NEED TO DO A TOUR AROUND THE MINECRAFT CLIFFSIDE SAM AND I BUILT..... IT'S SO CUTE....)

Cliffside is situated on a big ol' Cliff.

A tiny hamlet of a place, it used to have reason to exist, and now does not. It's not even a good tourist locale, as the cliff is much too dangerous compared to the nicer tourist spot of Welkin just a little north. Not to mention nearby Moraine's allure as a tax haven with no labour laws place where a bunch of TV and Movies are filmed!

It's where most of MYMK's main cast reside (except the antagonists from the Big City Varmonte), and is as such a location I have a lot of tiny little worldbuilding thoughts about :)

I won't go into the other locations here just because then this post will SUPER get away from me but... I think most importantly for Cliffside right now...

Is that it's where Purrgatorio is set. Yes, that VN I said got scrapped. It's not dead. It is in fact serving it's original intended purpose as "A (mostly) noncanon exploration of character voice and setting"

It's back and its prose babeyyyyyyy!!! (A BUNCH OF THE EARLY STUFF IS ME BEING SUPER RUSTY ... BE WARNED)

Purrgatorio is currently the most publicly available coherent work I have out of my ocs! It's very low-stakes and serves mostly to bash my toys together and see what character dynamics come out, but you can look if you want to!

(There's also a whole THING on the meta of its Canonicity... It's not canon, but it's also not NOT canon. But if I talk about Metanarrative Timeline Collapse in my normal mundane non-magic setting im gonna sound bonkers ✌)

Ali's dynamics with the MYMK cast are so goddamn funny to me. Like I literally just handed my OCs some ET shit but ET is a sexually repressed tumblr user with a mood disorder.

But yeah I don't think I can coherently string together much more about MYMK without just actually explaining THE WHOLE PLOT.... Though I will absolutely elaborate on any given character's Whole Deal if i'm prompted. (OH MY GOD I DIDNT EVEN TALK ABOUT CHROME AND TABITHA. WAIT. OKAY THERE'S. OK NO IF I TALKED ABOUT THEM IT'D JUST END UP AN ESSAY ,SORRY..)

So here's some bonafide classic images for the road.

(IF TUMBLR BREAKS THE FORMATTING AND JUST PUTS THESE ONE AFTER THE OTHER INSTEAD OF IN A GRID IM SO SORRY LMAOOOOO)

... And as for the other folders on my toyhouse!

Misc and Fandom are what they sound like. Self explanatory,

Then, Ysden is @samhainian's fantasy setting. It's where our DnD games happen to be set but it's also a general fantasy setting :)

and Monster of the Week... Is currently being revamped! It used to be a modern world setting with hidden magic, now it's going to be more... Adventure Time-y. Fantasy world get iphone. Yknow. It has a lower Age Rating than MYMK's "anything goes", as it started as a Pitch Bible Project in my animation class. They're a little neglected but I still love them :) The revamp is extemely recent and not reflected in any of the art/writing yet but I'm workin on it. It still doesn't have a proper title..... OTL

So yeah!! Uh. This wasn't as comprehensive as I was hoping but it turns out I have way, WAY too many thoughts on my guys. And no idea what to do when im actually asked about them so !!!! This was not a very coherent ramble but it was a ramble !

There's things like essays on Chrome and Tabitha (Link) and also The Queer Gender Identities Of The Whole Cast (Link) hiding around on my toyhouse, and once again, Purrgatorio (Link) serves as my sandbox for playing with how these characters act in situations.

But..... ! I did try to make my toyhouse approachable for the average layman. Every character in the MYMK folder (Link) has a *blurb* of information, rather than a giant wall of text explaining everything about them. I want people to be able to understand their general vibe at a glance rather than be overwhelmed.

In any case ???? Uh. Fun game for everyone: If you know your homestuck classpect, every single MYMK character has a classpect and lunar sway. and a birthday. Try and find your andrew-hussie assigned kin! As a Prospitian Witch of Heart, I share my classpect and lunar sway with Chrome. No I don't know what this means. It worries me honestly he's kind of an asshole.

[vampypurplequ33n]

HAPPY 8 YEAR ANNIVERSARY SANDERS SIDESS!!

I wish I could do more for this anniversary celebration but I have to go somewhere today and probably won’t have time to draw anything special. However, this is what I have time for since sanders sides was literally one half of my childhood and I recently got back into the hyperfixation of it. I love each of these characters to death and I’ll explain each of them in detail during this post <3

Logan: He is the best “teacher” ever! I wish he got more love from the other Sides, but the fandom definitely makes up for it. He’s a sucker for Crofters, got me into that jame btw, and he helped me learn a lot of new things! During one of my classes a teacher asked if anyone knew what a “Yerkes-Dodson Curve” was and let me tell you how I raised my hand so fast…. LOGAN MY BOI WE ALL LOVE YOU😭😭

Roman: The Man, the Prince, the Legend. He is so flamboyant I love him for that. He is the embodiment of “drama queen” and he definitely deserves that title. I loved this man to D E A T H since day one. I feel like half of me is literally his personality, and since I’m also insecure it checks out pretty well! If I was forced to only draw one Side for the REST of my life, it would be Roman in a heartbeat.

Patton: HES THE BIGGEST PUFFBALL WEVE GOT IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD AND EVERY CAN AGREE HES AMAZING AND OMFG HES SO ADORABLE AND EVERY BAD THING THAT HAPPENED TO HIM THAT HE COULDNT CONTROL SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED AND I ONLY WISH THE BEST FOR HIM AND HE DESERVES ALL THE COOKIES IN THE WORLD OMGGGGGGGGG- Ahem, aside all that… I do love Patton! He is like the father I wish I could have, and the childhood imaginary friend you had what you were a toddler as well! I love you to bits Patton!

Virgil: He’s a fan favorite, which is understandable. A ton of people deal with anxiety, and a lot of people love the color purple. I.. am in that group but in a slightly insane level- Not the anxiety part that’s being dealt with, but the P U R P L E. He’s my favorite BECAUSE he’s purple. When he was just black I didn’t really like him THAT much, but I saw the appeal. Once he got the purple tho, I LOVED THAT MAN. He really is a big fan favorite and I understand why. Plus he’s a silly little emo gay, who doesn’t like that?

Janus: MY SASSY BOII!!! We love to see him! We all know he loves wine, we all know he definitely needs some validation, and our boy deserves a hug. We love him, and as the saying goes “She is beauty, she is grace, she will lie right to your face.” And he is also the embodiment of…. “Girlboss, gatekeep, gaslight <3” And all of this is the truth, which is definitely gonna mess with him a lil bit :3

Remus: How do you describe your love of a character without it getting to redundant? I love this fucking trashy rat man to death and nothing will change my god damn mind. HES SO SCRUNKLY I LOVE HIM!!! HE IS THE ELBODIMENT OF THE OTHER SIDE OF ME, IM BEING DEADASS RIGHT NOW. I WILL ACTUALLY KEEP RANTING AND RANTING ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS GOD FORSAKEN MAN. I WILL FUCKING KILL FOR HIM (if he doesn’t do it first) His outfit, his personality, HIS FUCKING MACE. HE IS THE EMBODIMENT OF CHAOS AND I LIVE FOR IT!!

Thomas: Him. Just, Him. He deserves all the love this world can possibly give him and more. Whenever he posts is always, and I mean ALWAYS during a troubling part of my life. And he can get me through any bad days I may be having. I swear this guy knows when we are sad and posts RIGHT when that happens and it brings a chuckle to us, making the day MUCH BETTER. He is an inspiration, a goal, a dream, a PARENTAL FIGURE to most of the community and I want him to know that.

@thatsthat24 HAPPY ANNIVERSARY FOR SANDERS SIDES YOU DESERVE ALL OF THE GIFTS AND LOVE THIS COMMUNITY HAS GIVEN YOU!!!!

[cebwrites]

UH AH UH Gender Neutral with Crocodile? Sorry I’m just nervous, I hope you’re having a good day! I uh was wondering if it could be like how Crocodile might deal with a GN S/O who has extremely bad self esteem about everything about themselves idk I guess comfort hcs! Idc if you throw in NSFW or something this is YOUR blog and stuff so I’ll be happy with whatever (*'▽'*)> I love the way you write! Sorry if I’m bad at explaining or if you don’t want to do this request, Thank you again! Sorry aaaa

hii anon, no need to be nervous! i don't bite ᵕ꒳ᵕ i'm really glad you enjoy what i've put up here!!! hoping this one will be one of those too 💕

(putting in the fav scrunkly to fill up space aejdhfbsg)

comforting a s/o with low self esteem (Crocodile, Law)

gn reader, he/they law word count: 0.6k

Crocodile

Croc isn’t... the best at showing affection, much less comfort - if he’s this far into a relationship with someone for them to mean something that’s more than stress relief, though, he might as well give a go at it

He’s very stiff in the beginning, maybe even a little frustrated because why else would he even allow someone to get this close to him if he didn’t see their innate value?

Crocodile thinks if he throws enough shiny material possessions your way that these feelings will just go away after a while or you’ll be too distracted or busy with other things to pay any mind to them - spoiler alert: they don’t

Not everyone can simply repress everything away on command, Croccy

There’s a genuine attempt being made though, however misguided, you can give him that at least

I’d hesitate to say that Croc would open up about his own worries willingly; he’s got so many skeletons in the closet at this point that he’s taking them to his grave, but he’ll sometimes talk about old aspirations he used to have, when he sees that your distress getting really bad, silly things that young boys would dream up in their bedroom and share under the covers, things that were never really meant to come to fruition, just to take your mind away from the upsetting thoughts in your here and now while he’s got a strong, protective arm around you in his lap

Maybe you’re lulled by these impromptu (almost bedtime) stories, drifting away against the steady beat in his chest, or maybe you feel inclined to encourage him to chase those dreams again, that you know him of all people would be able to reach those goals more than anyone

Crocodile would sigh and pull your head back down against his shoulder and tell you that it’s time to rest, sounding far wearier than you’ve ever heard him before

Law

See, Law knows that he’s supposed to be comforting and reassuring - the problem is that he’s not exactly sure how

They’re not the best at emotional stuff and honestly Law might pass you off to Bepo, Shachi, or someone else at first because he’s not entirely comfortable doing this without being sure that he won’t fuck up

Like Crocodile, he’s willing to try, though, for his partner

Law goes about things a little clinically at first, explaining how everyone on the crew gets along with you, that your presence here is appreciated, how you’ve positively impacted those around you, etc, and then... traits that they personally admire about you, even if it does make the blood rush to his ears and your partner himself all huffy

Be patient with him, he’s trying his best, Law will come around eventually

In the privacy of your shared room, the best comfort they give is nonverbal; he’d pull you into bed with him, or maybe their lap in his office, locked, and just hold you close, nose buried in the crook of your neck, arms around your waist

They’re hesitant to show it, especially in public, but touch is a really big love language for Law, just being able to feel your skin against his own in a strictly romantic way does so much to ease the stressors of his day and Law hopes that by doing the same it’d be able to calm you, too

Your weight in his lap is comfortable while he works, but if your body so happens to obscure his vision, Law’s (sometimes) content with simply cuddling on the private couch in his office, too

[phantastragoria]

1, 10, 21, 25, 28 for the comic ask game 👀

1. Who's your favorite character and why?

I love all of the five main Guardians equally (plus associated others to varying degrees) but Peter Quill is my little silly man who I want to put into an enclosure so I can study him through a glass wall. I could write various essays about his character and WILL whenever I get some free time because the world NEEDS to understand him the way I do...

Despite his many inconsistencies in personality due to inconsistent writing, I find him to be a very fascinating character with his usually bright exterior but inherent loneliness even as he constantly surrounds himself with groups of people... the never-ending cycle of reinventing himself because he never seems quite comfortable in his own skin for prolonged periods of time... his abilities that I don't think anyone else quite understand because it's too complex... No matter how many times he gets his ass beat or fucks something up he always manages to find a way to continue on even if he really doesn't want to :'/ my scrunklie...

10. Share a favorite comic panel.

Annihilation: Conquest - Star-Lord #1 and Guardians of the Galaxy (2020) #10

Sorry you're getting 2-for-1 pages because I CANNOT choose between the two nor just pick panels. The first I genuinely love just because it's soooo mundane... is there anything better than a suiting up scene... Timothy Green/Victor Olazaba really got across with so little just how completely tired he is of the universe's bullshit while contemplating alone.

The second is because that page is just the coolest with everything coming together... the payoff to Peter returning with the gained knowledge of his sun-elemental abilities... getting part of the gang together to take down a space weirdo... Juan Cabal's composition & Federico Blee's coloring are just SO good. All their issues on GotG (2020) were fantastic but shout-out to the last few they worked on together and especially with #9 as THE standout in my opinion.

21. Share a favorite piece of comics lore.

The most important lore ever is that Drax/Arthur Douglas' favorite meal was macaroni and cheese... we stan a simple king.

25. Who's your favorite villain?

This one is hard because I don't tend to keep up with any of the villains just on their own. I want to say Mysterio SO BAD but I'm not even a hardcore Spiderman reader, and he's done nearly nothing in the grand scheme of things, the mere concept of him is just so funny to me... But hmmmmm, I enjoy Galactus + some of his heralds, I have complicated feelings on Thanos... I find Shuma-Gorath interesting but his appearances are so inconsistent and lacking in giving him any real character of his own...

I actually really enjoy when the various Elders of the Universe show up. I think they work well for setting up an ongoing arc and or just to be a villain of the week thing, there's just such a big variety of extreme hobby fanatics to choose from for any occasion. I don't have a specific favorite out of them all though, maybe En Dwi Gast?

Now, specifically a favorite villain for the Guardians? I really liked the #evil Olympians in Ewing's GotG (2020) and part of me wishes they had been the main threat for a little longer. Greek mythos mixed with cosmic stuff is fun! Plus I feel they were thematically appropriate and a good foil for the team as a whole while also tying back to Peter with the usually forgotten Spartax stuff, the final battle/confrontation with them was great. Ultimately however I think Adam going Magus Mode in the DnA run and the tragedy of him turning after dealing with the fissure Fault and the team trying to do everything to prevent it, failing to do so and then Magus fucking with all of them, is still the most directly personal/effective threat they've had to deal with before or since if that counts for this... I know Magus wasn't directly their problem for more than a few issues but still.

28. What got you into comics?

I was super invested in the Archie Sonic the Hedgehog comics when I was way younger after getting a free comic book day issue LOL that eventually faded away as I grew up and then my timeline was essentially:

Saw the first GotG film > read the current (at the time) comics and was like ehhhhhhhh and fell off for a bit >> eventually went through and read the Annihilation era stuff and then went further back for individual characters >>> by that point All-New Guardians launched in 2017 and I LOVED the first half of that run >>>> Then it devolved into mass crossover event insanity and completely dropped Gamora's personal stakes in the plot to have a random soul stone monster being the mastermind of it all >>>>> Saw IW + EG and was SO HEARTBROKEN by the Guardians treatment in those movies that I completely put off reading anything Marvel related for a while LOL >>>>>> then the Eidos game came out and broke me and I read thru all the stuff I missed after Infinity Warps/etc and now I'm here.

[giuliano-fan-account]

NEW CHAPTER

new chapter alert 

I am.. I cant EVEN OH MY GOD ANYWAYS

If you dont even want to hear or see anything of the new chapter i dont reccomend looking as I’m gonna talk about some things during this chapter, things that could happen after this chapter and things from clash pt 1 (ch 390).

But anyways...

This was probably my favorite part. Lynch and Zakuro have such a good dynamic im crying I cant have yet another duo in my head but yet here they are.

Seeing them again in general in a new chapter was just magical in and of itself. like dude. THEYRE BACK  . AND ITS REAL AND WOW...

“HOW CAN I GET IT TO DIE?” I LOVE LYNCH SO MUCH HELP SHE IS JUST SO BLUNT AND AND ANWYAYS.

I also love the introduction to another aspect of Zakuros ability and just the sheer amount of personality both of them have been given in the short amount of time they’ve been introduced. 

And like how does Zakuro know who Hisoka is? Do they even know??? I’m guessing that their funky little blood pellets won’t find Hisoka, but will instead find a phantom troupe member.

Give me a minute to see where everybody was the last time Togashi showed the map. (I’m hoping they’ll find machi bc... machi fan reasons)

Theyre all on teir 3 (Zakuro, Lynch, Hinrigh) in a food/shopping court, then Zakuro and Lynch go into a hallway somewhere, but other than that I dont know.

Map without locations of people: (Ch 358)

Map with loactions of people: (Ch 380)

Ok, so if Machi stays in teirs 4/5, then it’s unlikely that she’ll come across Zakuro and Lynch.

I think there could be 3 things that could happen:

1. They may run into more Heil-Ly associates such as Luini or Cashew, but Hinrigh is already kind of dealing with those people. 

Maybe Hinrigh will run into Luini and Zakuro and Lynch will run into Cashew or vice versa. Depending on how their ability works and the descriptions they were given, Zakuros ability could very well mistake somebody else for being Hisoka, as they’re just looking for anybody ‘suspicious’.

2. It would be interesting to see if the Illumi = Hisoka theory could come into play. Zakuro and Lynch are hunting down Hisoka, but what if they run into Illumi instead because Zakuros ability spotted him and recognized him as being Hisoka... Though I think Mizai and Botobai intervined this in previous chapters. The lockdown was lifted, so there’s a possibility that Kalluto and Illumi could have been released, but iirc we haven’t gone back to their perspective since.

3. Chrollo, Bonolenov, and Shizuku are at the bottom of the fourth teir, but aside from Illumi and Kalluto, they are the closest members of the troupe. Since they’re both hunting down Hisoka, a matter of things could happen. I doubt that they would want to team up, and instead, I feel like tensions would be made, as the troupe’s (specifically Chrollo’s) interaction with the Cha-R group (I think) at the dining hall wasn’t very amicable, and the associates even noted that they were trouble. Chrollo seems to REALLY want to be the one to kill Hisoka as well, so I can imagine he would have mixed feelings on two people he has no idea about looking for him, and possibly looking to kill him before he does.

Any way it goes, I can’t wait for the loose threads in the storyline to be actually tied.

Anyways, enough of going into that part of the chapter, I want to talk about Hinrigh’s ability now.

At first, tbh I didn’t think that I would be very invested in Hinrigh, but this chapter saved my opinion because like.

HIS ABILITY IS SO FREAKING GOOFY LIKE. HE JUST MAKES A CAMERA INTO A CAT AND THEN PUTS ‘EM ON “RECORD MODE”. It’s so silly but in all seriousness what an amazing ability. It’s so convenient, and the fact that he can make full on animals out of everyday animals is pretty astonishing. Imagine the type of training and how much of it you’d have to do to master that ability. 

+ The cat is so scrunkly i love it so much I would die for the RECORD MODE cat. It reminds me of those videos on youtube where the people put the cameras on the cats collar. I wonder if that was the inspiration for this, because a cat isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when you think of recording or having another pair of eyes or whatever, and I wouldn’t put it past Togashi. Our man full on made an ability (Silent Majority) out of a song name, and put in facts about the weight of bowling balls just because he likes to watch bowling. 

MEOW... BIP

I also like to think that he just makes companions for when he’s alone on the job. Like he makes a dog out of a machine gun and bonds with it and if somebody tries to attack him because they think he’s distracted he’s like “aha!!!” and shoots them with his machine gun dog.

I cant wait to see the next chapters, even though I doubt they’ll be for free on viz, I’ll find another way to see them. I’m so excited to be experiencing the comeback of my favorite series!

Anyways you all keep being funny like that record mode cat

Those Pigeons are a Serious Problem.

[somelazyassartist]

Okay so!! I haven't finished digitizing the three Player Characters (I've been working on these for a few weeks now and I only finished them tonight, I'll try to see if I can get the PCs done tomorrow now that I have sketches done of em) but!!!! These were the five Sidekick options I gave my players to balance out their campaign a bit!!! And all the ones they didn't choose are gonna be NPCs throughout the adventure so they're not just disappearing :) but uhhhh yeah basically I just tried to make Weird Little Fellas because all the player characters are Weird Little Fellas and I wanted the sidekick to fit in with them as basically "I don't belong here and I need to get the hell out of Barovia" ya know lol

This one's Acro the Bat, the Acrobat!! (They/them) They're an Orc-Werebat Monk who used to work for a circus before they got separated from their troupe and accidentally wandered through the fog into Barovia :)

This one's Kruggus!! (He/him) He's a Goblin Barbarian who used to be a gladiator before he was framed for a crime he didn't commit and was kicked out of his guild, and stumbled into Barovia while he ran away

This is the Human Wild Magic Sorcerer Serenity Redheart!! (She/her) She's a noble from Waterdeep whose wild magic accidentally malfunctioned and left her looking a lot younger than she really is (the Wild Magic table doesn't lie, it really does have some wild results), and she's trying to get out of Barovia and back to her mentor in the hopes they can get her back to normal!!

And this is Llaulumyn Lastname the Drow Artificer and I love a him,,,, (He/him) He's a researcher that purposefully came to Barovia for a book he's writing, buuuuuuuut he's sorta been there for like 400 years more or less by himself and has definitely tried walking in the poison fog one too many times For Science so like,,, he's not like a Mad Scientist™ but he does have a few screws loose here or there just cuz like. If you were stuck by yourself in a random demiplane for hundreds of years with only books a grumpy ghost and a living ventriloquist dummy to keep you company you'd probably be a little quirky too, wouldn't you???

And then of course there's Daubble Antondre, the scrunkly, my little skrimblo bimblo <3 (he/him, she/her) Y'all know Daubble,,,, the Half-Eladrin Bard that is just a Silly Little Guy :) and also during our session we apparently established that Daubble likes virgin piña coladas which apparently exist in Dungeons and Dragons now because I said so

[helenas-crashed-car]

river rambles about viktor (real) (not arcane)

viktor. viktor mazur. envy. feliks' really tall spider freak boyfriend. spider dude taylor exploded into a bazillion bajillion pieces. viktor has a lot of silly little things I could call him! he's a lad. a very big lad. a very big spider lad. i adore him. i really shouldn't, because he's one of my main villains for my first comic part, but wow, he's one of my favorites!

as you can tell from my penchant for drawing him, I have problems in my brain. one of them includes liking a polish guy who bisected himself and attached him to a giant spider. he's probably my favorite antithesis villain, because I think jesse takes the spot as my favorite villain overall. jesse is just TOO funny to kill off. they say "slayyyy" and then shoot someone. viktor on the other hand? he kind of just... sulks in his cave all day, sometimes eating people. such a lad. love them both.

perpetually 24, viktor mazur is a former polish prince who has been confined to a cave for 500 years. he used to be a man who prided himself on researching anatomy and the body, seeking ways to improve his and others' health, but ultimately 500 years of being trapped in a cave have worn him down to a pallid man starving for a meal. feed this lad. he is a very jealous person, stewing in rage at seeing friedrich's collection of notes he isn't allowed to touch despite being accomplished in the medical field, or watching karlis pull bitches he could never get. his jealousy often boils over to hate or at the very least violence (sorry, feliks). it didn't help that he spent a good chunk of his adult life hanging out with the worst people in Europe in the 1500s, the Sins. there are a lot of reasons why viktor took the moniker of Envy.

one of viktor's closest friends was a latvian man, andris. andris is karlis' brother, but so, so, *so* much more tolerable. i cannot tell you how much I hate karlis. andris and viktor were the... most normal. of the sins, I guess. i mean, they weren't karlis, who valued pleasures of the flesh more than people. andris and viktor often worked together, although andris more assisted viktor with his research of the body than andris coming up with his own discoveries (andris is not very scientifically inclined). outside of scientific settings, they did both value each other. i bet they went to festivals together.

don't ship them together, though, andris is heterosexual. plus viktor already is dating a man named feliks, although feliks comes around 500 years later and andris and viktor haven't seen each other in also 500 years.

honestly, in an alternate universe, viktor would have been completely against friedrich. friedrich hoards knowledge, seeing himself as the only person fit to distribute or consume it (which isn't something shared by his descendant jesse, but they go to pretty wide lengths to obtain arcane knowledge they seek). he would not have been against him for moral reasons ("killing gods to try and obtain godhood is not right!"), but more "you're a nasty bitch let me into your library". i mean, he already disliked Friedrich because of his habit of hoarding knowledge, but *he* chose to follow him. and viktor *did* want to do the whole godhood thing.

viktor laments his decision to edit his body with a giant spider, and try and ascend to godhood, but honestly... yeah, it was his fault. the sins weren't a cohesive group, but they wanted the same thing. the only one who could get 'justified' would be andris, with karlis goading him to join him in godhood. but really, yeah, the sins are to blame. i love viktor as a character, absolutely adore him, but you have to understand: viktor helped kill several gods, killed the magical beast he was bonded with, grafted it to his body, injected himself with ichor, and now waits in a cave sticking people with his webbing then eating them later. he's a great character, but don't go around calling him the scrunkly. rotate him in your brain while keeping in mind of his crimes.

he will not stop rotating in my brain. i can't stop it. i might as well become a viktor mazur blog he is stuck in there. like a spider in a web... omg spider reference.

[neriumdelusion]

TMA for the ask game!

HOOOLY SHIT OKAY!!! Mwah kisses you on the forehead/p

Blorbo - my blorbo is probably Michael! I was absolutely obsessed with that guy and the system decided to fuck around and get a fictive of him so that was a time! He’s got such an interesting character I love all the discussion around identity and if you have a self. Ot hit very close to home and he is very dissociation actually so that was relatable! Michael Shelley is great , on of the most anger inducing things is people infantilising Michael Shelley. He’s not a kid you absolute dipshit. The distortion itself is such a cool concept and I’m obsessed. Michael distortion is both but also not really either and waaa I love them<3<3<3 ALSO Melanie king! I cannot talk as much about her I have strong incoherent thoughts about her she is wonderful and probs the smartest archive assistant in the show. (Sasha was not ‘the brain cell’ actually she followed some blond weirdo to an abandoned pub) and her and Georgie are so much to me! BUT LIKE…Michael , Melanie and Sasha James too if I had to pick. Sasha means a lot to me and I disagree with the fanon of ‘oh she’s the brain cell’ no the fuck she is not, let a girl be a lil silly omg you guys hate to see a girlboss winning.

Scrunkly - hmm. You see all of them are just SO. I think if I was forced to choose I would go Jane Prentiss! I’m a strong believer she did nothing wrong, her arc hit very close as someone with bfrbs and dependency issues! She is wonderful I’m corruption aligned. I think a lot about her pre corruption and what she said in her statement about going to the park in the sun and drinking wine. It’s healing to imagine her doing the same while with the hive, or post-hive (I read a fic and it was good so now it’s canon) I think she is wonderful! And gorgeous with the worms btw, only lame people don’t think she’s cute with the worms.

Scrimblo bimblo - OLIVER BANKS. Get fucked he’s like sexiest best most epic guy ever he committed identify theft to take a nap and I felt him! Epic guy wonderful I don’t know too much about him but Oliver banks is one of my favourite characters! Not to mention I love end avatars, not aligned with it much myself but it slaps!

Glup shitto - RYAN (mentioned in episode 101, Michael’s statement) AND GABRIEL THE WORKER OF CLAY (I think he’s mentioned more than once but mainly ep 101 again) my lord I have so any thoughts about how Michael and Ryan’s childhood friendship literally lead to Michael becoming the distortion! What if Ryan’s not dead hmm? What I’d they reunited hmm? What if they were besties again hmm? Also the worker of clay is such a cool character, he basically worshiped the distortion and “dissolved his veins in crimson mud” when the great twisting failed. I’m obsessed. Since people like religious themes in relationships so much JUST LOOK AT GABRIEL WORKER OF CLAY!!!! So many opportunities here you’re all sleeping on them.

Poor little meow meow - Jon sad guy Sims my favourite pathetic archivist <3<3<3<3 he’s just sopping wet!! Love him!! Quite relatable but like specifically in seasons 2 and up. Don’t relate much to academic nerd my test week starts tomorrow and I haven’t done any revision. I can however relate to paranoia and suspicion of those who care about you <3 ! Idk if I have a problematic fave? I genuinely dislike Gertrude Robinson but I’m not like weird about it. System Michael feels quite strongly about it and I always disliked the fact she is reminiscent of adults I tried to gain the approval of and failed and got upset. Soooo I don’t like gertie but if you do good for you ! So Jon is my most pathetic guy I like methinks.

Horse plinko - my hc and fic track record would suggest Michael and Jon! And Tim! I love me some good Tim after realising not-Sasha isn’t Sasha! I love Tim but oh my lord that is the good shit. I would torment Elias bc fuck him (mad at what he did to Melanie and Martin specifically I don’t care if he kills people or is evil I’m mad at two very specific events).

Eeby deeby - we’ve already talked about my feelings on Gertrude. I hate her but that’s entirely for bias and personal reasons and she’s a well written and compelling character. I’m not like overly big on hating Elias he’s whatever, I DO hate Peter Lukas, I think people really minimise how awful he really was. He did what Gertrude did but he never had any good intentions! At least gertie was trying to save the world. Peter was just a dick. Of course he’s still funny and I like that he got PLAYED by Martin WOOO go Martin (didn’t fit any of the categories but Martin is very important to me and he’s a badass and cool stop being like ‘soft boy’ bc my lad he is a full grown man you’re just fatphobic.) anyways! Answer? MARY KEAY. I cannot believe I haven’t mentioned my hatred for her before. (She’s again well written the podcast is good so like obvs) BUT MY LORD. she is quite like our mother in some aspects and Gerry’s statement hit quite hard. She’s a bitch with do redeeming features no good intentions I would happily see her rot <3<3

And on that note!!! Thank you sm for the ask bestie I love an excuse to go back to my roots and talk about my lovely archives guys

[rubykgrant]

(This one is RVB-themed, just for the heck of it~)

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

Church. Epsilon and Alpha, all both of him. I can’t pick who I like more between Alpha or Epsilon, not because they aren’t different from each other (because they ARE), but both of them have done so many things that I find equally hilarious/entertaining. Also, Grif and Simmons, who are lumped together for different reasons (they’re funny individually, but the humor levels increase by proximity... they’re just so stupid for each other, I love it)

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

Theta~ Listen, half my reasons for wanting to un-kill Church somehow is just so I can save ALL the AI Fragments, because I miss Theta the most. Awesome little skater dude, who is also super smart and clever, and he never did anything wrong, I know this and I love him. Also, Tucker Junior, who is LITERALLY a baby! Or at least, we’ve seen him since he was born, and he might be extra-big now, but he is still a good little guy, y’know? Baby boy, baby

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

The Flag Zeaolots... they’re endlessly entertaining. I guess they’re not TOO underappreciated, because who doesn’t remember these goobers, but man... it was beyond funny when they first showed up, and then it was really cool when they returned in later seasons... I feel like they had so much potential to be ACTUAL THREATS that wasn’t explored enough. I’ll also never forget the the line “Everyone, look unto me!” it just cracks me up. Oh, and Gary, when we only knew him as the talking computer! The fact that he just... hung out with Church for so long, who knows how long it really was, and it was evidently a trick, but all their little exchanges were so silly

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

That dude Phil who Wyoming killed. I just love his line “Stupid sucky wind” when he hears a noise. He sounded like such a pouty little punk haha. There’s a lot of other characters I like too, but they at least are in more than one scene; like the volleyball girl on Chorus, and Sharkface (because fire is COOL)

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

Hmm... that’s honestly tricky to figure out... I like a handful of characters who are kinda a-holes, but I don’t know if I’d call them “my poor little meow meow”. I guess, South, Maine AND the Meta; honestly, if other characters hadn’t pushed them into various corners, they wouldn’t seem so “bad”, but at the same time- I kinda root for them to win, even in the situations where they’re kinda being jerks (because they sorta deserve a win... and they aren’t like some of the other mean characters, South wasn’t gonna go on a universe-wide killing-spree, Maine had these little moments where we see he’s a decent guy, and even the Meta had intentions that weren’t “evil”... just had some extreme ways of going about it)

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

I almost wanna say Felix, but he’d probably enjoy it... actually, I like imagining all the characters in various stressful scenarios, but then I’m nice to them. Sure, I torment everybody, but eventually I make happy stuff happen. Oh, but I do like the idea of Gene surviving the volcano, returning and trying to be a solo-villain, and he just... screws up. He constantly shoots himself in the foot (figuratively and literally). He also just won’t STOP, so his suffering never ends. This amuses me~

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

Dr Sadboy McDeadwife is probably already there, so... y’know what, Hargrove can just go there too. Plenty of room in superhell for them both

[girlwiththegreenhat]

someone already sent portal so deltarune for ask meme

blorbo: not even a question, it’s queen. if i hadn’t already talked at length about her numerous times i’d do it again but y’all should know Exactly how much i love this idiot woman by now. holy shit. the miss blorbo from my games 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙 not only is she my blorbo she has solidly put herself among some of my Favorite Characters Of All Time Ever. marry me maybe?? 😳👉👈

scrunkly: LANCERRR LANCER LANCER LANCER LANCER THROWS HIM INTO A WALL (WHICH HE HARMLESSLY BOUNCES OFF OF) LANCERRRRRRR SHAKES HIM LIKE A CAN OF SODA MY SILLY ROUND BOY LANCER. BABY BOY. LIL DUDE REALLY DOES GIVES ME CUTENESS AGGRESSION. I AM TAKING HIM TO MAC DONALDS. SILLY LITTLE SCRUNKLY <3 i can’t believe nobody in card castle liked him except for his dads, he is Such A Fella. if i worked there he would be the highlight of my day. i love lancer he’s my son i’ve signed up for the lancer dad club 

scrimblo bimblo: sweet cap’n cakes my darlings they should have had a bigger role in ch2 ✨ they get some fandom love but they were underrated as far as canon goes. i even see some people calling them annoying or pointless, which... 🔪 Shut. it’s not their fault they were put in a little haphazardly. i think another appearance or two could have helped them a lot there. but also like, the concept of a rebellion against the queen? that had Potential. i love and adore funny robot (or robot-adjacent) characters and i REALLY like their designs, their personalities are fun and play off of each other well, and also cap’n has good taste he calls queen a hot mama and He’s Right!

glup shitto: METTATON. or, i guess, the ghost that’s Supposed to become Mettaton? it’s as weird as it is sad that, because there’s no one to build his cool robot body for him, he’s just... a shut-in now :( you don’t even see him but his few lines of dialogue are so unhappy and it Hurts Me! it’s such a weird shift from how he is in undertale. and the whole “neo body in queen’s basement” thing, the fact that he still designed it and still has those dreams... i really hope there’s some solution for his situation by the end of the game, even if the robot angle isn’t feasible.

honorable mentions go to seam, swatch, and The Original    Starwalker. seam will likely be lightly relevant again given their knowledge of the secret bosses and the crystals but swatch is probably stuck in the cafe now and Starwalker is. well. Starwalker. i will be stopping by the cafe at all opportunities every chapter to talk to the funny bird. i hope they tell you about stupid shit that happens in the cafe when you’re not around. give me the castle town tea.

poor little meow meow: not controversial (does DR even have controversial characters?) but wins by the pathetic qualifier alone - rouxls :) i’m pretty sure i have actually called him a poor little meow meow before dfjkjdlkfldkf. wheatley 🤝 rouxls: being pathetic and stupid. he wants to be a cool bad guy so much and impress people but he’s actually a big dumb baby. instead of fighting you he either makes other people do it or makes you play a minigame. it’s genuinely surprising that hitting him in ch2 doesn’t immediately end the fight and make him lay down and cry. i am going to steal this grown-ass man’s lunch money, there’s something wrong with him 💙 (he can have half a scrunkly point too on account of Also being very shaped)

i don’t know if i want this section to age well or not

horse plinko: not that spamton needs more torment in his life but i would bully him and then buy him lunch (with the money i stole from rouxls). kick him like a soccer ball at 40mph but into a nice bed. i would put him into an actual plinko machine too except i take out the fire pit. there is no nice ending to that one aside from the fact that i took out the fire pit. maybe i’d replace it with legos instead idk i want to torment this little freak but then be nice to him

snowgrave spamton though i would steer to hit with my car and not even look back

jevil can go in the plinko too actually he’s a Funny Little Dude but i’m still sore over being stuck on his boss fight for a month. i would like to torment that clown for the same amount of time i spent fighting him

eeby deeby: i will find the edge of hell just so i can personally kick spade king into it sparta-style. it’s funny, he’s not even that bad of a guy but he threatened and neglected my boy lancer and tried to kill his friends so. y’know. it’s a personal vendetta. that i have. against a fictional character. unless he comes around he can stay in gay baby jail

... huh. come to think of it, i wonder if recruiting all the enemies in the game is the key to turning him into an ally? you don’t get the Silly Dialogue in ch2 unless you do, otherwise all he comments on is “leaving them behind”. and that’s his whole beef with lightners, that he was once left behind. interesting! maybe the lancer fun squad proving not all lightners are the same and that they care about darkners is what gets him to change his mind. still sending him to eeby deeby though Goodbye Fucker!

[pelman]

my actual legit review which does have spoilers so it will be under the cut (also this is just about the story mode):

i really really liked it!

having played octo expansion first, i definitely had a big "holy shit!!" moment when i realized that alterna is structured like octo expansion. it doesnt really feel like a total REPEAT though which is a plus. theyre the same structure, but both with their own ideas, yknow?

there definitely could have been like.. different challenge levels, though. maybe dont put a 50 egg 1 try target busting course in thank you i suck at aiming even with a blaster? i liked the splat 3 "dont touch the enemy ink" level more though personally even if it was a lot more frustrating. the "1 curling bomb per area" gimmick was interesting, at least. there could have been less zipcaster levels imo but i understand WHY they spent like 4 levels orienting you with the zipcaster. more on that later.

lil buddy helping you out was really fun! i didnt like the seemingly arbitrary amounts of eggs tied to each ooze pile but i didnt have to go back to gather more eggs from kettles id already done more than once, either, and that was only because i was impulsive with clearing too much out at once. having to find all the power egg packs fucking sucked though. i spent like 5-10 minutes trying to find ONE LAST PACK in site 4 because smallfry just WOULD NOT FUCKING PING FOR IT. it was annoying as fuck. i liked finding the decorations all over though; it was always exciting to see what would be in the next capsule. the sunken scrolls were also a LOT easier to get this time around; i still dont think ill ever end up finding them all in the spla2n story mode just because they feel so much more tedious to get.

DEEP CUT was SO FUCKING FUN to fight. the fact that each one had their own unique gimmicks was so so fun and i love how it let their individual personalities shine so brightly. shivers little tongue out manic face was so silly and cute and i love that big mans ink had the deep cut logo as a pattern! speaking of big man was fucking TRIVIAL. easiest boss fight out of all of them. if you want to "cheat": get the sensor and look for the red reticle when you submerge. he also throws bombs at you. so like. not hard to track him at all. i had the most difficulty with shiver, out of the 3 deep cut members

honestly i thought that when grizz was talking about taking craigs brain that he was going to fucking LOBOTOMIZE the man. like. i literally said "DID HE JUST LOBOTOMIZE HIM???" out loud but no craig is just small now. scrunkly, if you will. will he ever transform again? probably not hes just small now. lil baby man

speaking of grizz. why does he look like that. he looks like this

but like fucked up. at least this eliminates the evil off the hook and evil sheldon theories entirely! speaking of i love that sheldon is a respected member of the community. ik thats unrelated but i love sheldon ok.

but like. How is this man. also small fry becoming huge fry was funny i love that it preserves the haircut you choose. my bobcut ass fish boy taking down a massive grizzly bear

anyways official rating:

it good

MY OFFICIAL SPLATOON 3 REVIEW

it good